#i dont wanna hear the whole “god doesnt make mistakes!”

[multifandomhallucinations]

yall ever just wake up in such a piss poor mood that you feel like if you go into headspace you'll punch a persecutor? - Alex/Topaz

[pumpkinsy0]

Hcs for if Johnny didn't fw Curly??(I kinda feel like they wouldn't get along too well)

another day of ppl not rockin w curly whats new for the curtis gang🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

•if johnny dont fw curly, curly aint fuckin w him either, hes not kissing up to johnny of all ppl

•ive seen some ppl hc that johnnys being more assertive and more combative w curly but tbh??? ion think thats happening, johnny is like a scared cat who sometimes claws, i feel like he tries backing away from curly

•on top of that i genuinely think hes afraid of all the shepards, theres no way in gods almost green earth hes taking his chance and fighting one of em in any way of the word

•he only makes comments when he KNOWSSSSS curly wont hear, he made the mistake once and was mute almost the rest of the day bc the glare curly gave him was actually insane😭

•curlys a dickhead he likes scaring johnny and pony constantly has to tell him to quit it, and this is one of the rare times curly does bc theres a tone in ponys voice that means to back off, yes curlys like “😏😏😏” cause pony u can b slightly intimidating when u wanna b, but hes also thinking “boooooo fun ruined🙄🙄🙄”

•johny is sick and tired of hearing curlys name from pony, he’d let pony say what he wants to say, but if u think johnnys gonna sit here n let their whole time be spent talking about that guy, ur wrong

• pony🫱🏻‍🫲🏽johnny

hating the fact that despite being around their own age curly still scares em at times

like ikkkkkk they bond over that a lil bit

•ok just imagine curly wasnt locked up, if tim took curly w him to the hospital, i DO think they would stop at johnnys room and that would b the first time they genuinely spoke to each other, and it would b so awkward and only last like 5 minutes

•hes not trying to break them up, obviously pony sees something in curly johnnys not seeing, but johnny is still protective of pony and only kinda accepts him for ponys sake

•realistically, johnny COULD get curly roughed up (not beat up tho) through dally, dally already doesnt think too highly of curly so if dally heard what curly said/did to johnny, he COULD go out for him, but curlys LUCKY johnny aint that kinda guy🙄🙄

[mapliusoup]

my big theory about whats going on in the bp universe- pt1

hey guys!!!! im just so excited abt the whole tour and the possibility that theyll release new stuff so i thought. why not share the brainrot with the swarm!!!

this is gonna be a i think 5-part (maybe more, maybe less) series of theories im gonna be doing :)

i also wanted to clarify that these are my theories and i am not in any way claiming they are true! im just having some fun lmao, if u wanna add anything just share with me im curious

(i dont include house of wolves and teenagers in the story btw they just dont fit in for me)

this is the part 1, the beginning.

the black parade, for me, is about death. and coming to terms with yourself. i am going to tell the story how i view it.

the story is about the patient, a man dying of terminal illness, most possibly cancer. he is alone, he is sad, and he has nobody to spend his last moments with. this is about him. and death.

his story starts with i dont love you. his partner has had enough of him: he is selfish, broken, and they dont think they can fix him. so they leave him. and he is alone.

the patient never had anyone he could remember of apart of them: his family? he didnt remember them.

in between that and the next song of the album, his fate is sealed. he gets diagnosed with terminal cancer and admitted into hospital. he has no one there. he cant remember anything about his past, in between these white walls.

the sharpest lives, the next song of the album, is the patient being angry. he is angry, at his partner, at the hospital, at himself, at the non-existent god that cursed him to this fate. he cant die, he does not deserve to. he complains, shouting at no one, about his unfair fate.

in this is how i disappear, his anger slowly starts to dissipate, shifting, and turning into slight sadness, maybe even remorse. he misses his lover: he wants to be normal. he wants them back. he doesnt want to go just yet.

in cancer, the patient is starting to realize his fate: hes dying. and there is nothing he can do to stop it. hes regretting every single mistake he ever made. the patient hates himself. he is alone because he deserves it: dying will free him for all this loneliness. he says his goodbyes to no one. and then he dies.

the end.

he opens his eyes, and he is in a place he does not recognize. a land of gothic infrastructures, tall and cutting the horizon into strange shapes. (we'll talk about this landscape more in the future; remember it.) he is surrounded by silhouettes, faceless people he does not know, but that yet seem so familiar. a young white-haired man approached him, smiling. "welcome," he said. "to the aftermath of your life."

the young man, the parade leader as he calls himself, explains to the patient that he is dead. he tells him that because of what how much of an asshole he was when alive, he is here, now.

in welcome to the black parade, the parade leader tells the patient about this place.

the parade, for me, is the purgatory: they send lost souls there to repent themselves- or, alternatively, to get them to hell. the parade leader and his band sing for them, they sing for them to make them remember all their past mistakes and to decide of their fate. the band is stuck there, in this limbo, forever: what got them here, they do not know. maybe the tour will shed some light on the origin of the parade.

then comes dead!, where the parade leader laughs at the patient, explaining to him that he made these mistakes, that he is unloved and he deserves whats hapenning to him now. the patient tries to deny it so hard, but he knows its true. he knows he fucked up.

in a burst of pain, for knowing that this is his fault, the patient has a vision.

he lays in wet dirt, the smell of blood and death in his nostrils. he hears screams and gunshots all around him.

suddenly, he remembers. the patient went to war, probably world war two (i like to think he went there because of the ghost of you music video. maybe im overthinking it lmao), and killed people there. a lot of people. it was normal to kill people at war, of course. but it haunted him. during the battles, he lost so many friends. so many brothers. the only person he had left was his mother.

mama.

his mother cried when he came back. because she could see the blood on his hands. she cried because her own son had murdered other women's flesh- their families.

she died quickly, too sad to live like this.

from that moment and then next song, there is a big gap that im going to try my best to explain.

basically, after the patient recovered his memories of his mother and the war, he started regretting all that he did even more. at the same time, he accepted it: everyone was imperfect. everyone was human. he comes at peace with himself, and prepares to die. i mean yeah he already died but like just his mind died? like he was still technically alive because his old memories still attached him to the living world.

in famous last words, the patient tells his last regrets to the parade leader: how he couldnt tell his mother and his partner that he loved them: that he couldnt live a long healthy life: that he couldnt say sorry to the mothers of all the men he killed.

but in disenchanted, he comes to terms with that: it is sad, but it is how it is. just a sad song, with nothing to say. there is nothing he can do to stop it, so he might as well go peacefully.

the parade leader, himself, had grown attached to this man: the patient was like him in many ways. he couldnt quite explain it, or understand it, but it hurt to let him go.

and so, in sleep, the parade leader sets him off. his song comes from deep inside, from his guts. it hurts. it hurts so bad to let him go. as he screams at him to go to sleep, there is a flash of darkness. and so the patient ends.

thats kind of my interpretation of the story! a man who is broken and does not know why, who is going to suffer an unfair end, and who finally comes to terms with who he is thanks to another lost soul. ofc, thats just how i personally see it!

last little thing before he start working on the next parts, for which i have wayyy more evidence for what im gonna speculate hehe

blood is the "transition" to the next part of the story. the parade changed after the death of the patient. it wasnt the patient directly, but something had changed after he left. the parade had become more defiant, more unstable, more resisting. so someone had to stop them.

thats when swarm comes in.

feel free to share ur theories with me!! i love to hear them :3

[aaasdgnklm]

hey hye wanna hear my epic rant too bad ur gonna anyways

spoiler warning for epic: the musical, the thunder saga

Ok so the thunder saga. genuinely I’ve been shaking so much every time I’ve heard it. I’m gonna go song by song and this is a rant so theres gonna be a shitton of tangents sorry

1. suffering

this title scared me SO MUCH when I heard it cause like oh fuck my poor little guy(hes a king and has fought multiple wars and killed thousands of people) doesnt need more shit happening to him like leave him alone and then the melody was so upbeat and I was like huh?? and then ‘penelope’ starts talking and I’m like. pardon. what. sorry?? I was confused as shit, mostly at how nonchalant ODYSSEUS was. my first assumption was its gotta be one of the gods fucking w/ him but then why is he so casual? so I thought it was a dream. but then there were little things, penelope’s asking him to get in the water(which. reminds me of. someone HAHSBHADBH), and then he says hes scared of the water and I’m like. my guy I hope youre not afraid of the water youre a captain on a ship. but then I realized theres no way odys afraid of the water unless its bcuz of posideon, and penelope WOULDNT KNOW ABOUT THAT so he wouldnt say “you know I’m afraid of the water”. and then ofc shes like “daughter” and I’m like nope. this aint penelope and its not a dream cause then it would be odysseus’ mind making her up and hed never think daughter. And then odysseus asks how to get home and at this point I’m like hm. ok. so this is some kind of water based monster trying to pretend to be penelope to lure him in, right? (ALSO the fact that the only time in the song odysseus drops the act is when he says “but scylla has a cost” is so mmmmmm)and then. and then.

2. different beast

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT THIS IS WHERE THINGS GOT GOOD. like I love suffering but different beast scratches my brain SO GOOD and the rest of the saga was uphill from there I ahhhhhhhh. initial reaction: odysseus’ explanation that he knew what had been happening the whole time was SO GOOD and had my mouth hanging open the whole time. and then when he says “cut their tails off, we’re ending this now. throw their bodies back in the water. let them drown.” ohhhhhhhhhh my god holy fuck this was when it kinda hit for me- odysseus was not fucking around in monster hes actually BRUTAL in the thunder saga and I honestly hope it continues cause fuck yeah character development. also there were SO MANY lines in this that are just SO GOOD. “youve been tryna take my life this whole time” “I know exactly what you are, youre a siren.” “my real wife knows I’m not scared of the water, and my real wife knows I dont have a daughter.” “we found a ship with no crew” “sirens know about every route and horizon now I know how to get back to my island!” “so you can kill the next group of sailors in this part of the sea? nah, you wouldnt have spared me. I made a mistake like this once it almost cost my life, I cant take more risks of not seeing my wife. cut off their tails!” “kill them all!” and then the “odysseus” at the end I’m like why does that sound familiar? MFER ITS CAUSE ITS IN THE “You dont think I know my own palace? I built it.” SOUND CLIP IM

3. scylla

silly little sounds. silly little men. silly little deaths. ok so I watched the livestream so I saw the anamatic and holy SHIT the moment that eurylochus realized why odysseus had him light six torches was BRUTAL. also eurylochus’ confession that he opened the wind bag? ohhhhhhh ok MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH also when odysseus said “not much to say” god he sounds so tortured I cant with this. and scyllas voice in general is so ahhhhhh ESPECIALLY the “Hello.” and DROWN IN YOUR SORROW AND FEARS. CHOKE ON YOUR BLOOD AND YOUR TEARS. BLEED TILL YOU RUN OUT OF YEARS. WE MUST DO WHAT IT TAKES TO SURVIVE. GIVE UP YOUR HONOR AND FAITH. LIVE UP YOUR LIFE AS A WRAITH. DIE IN THE BLOOD WHERE YOU BATHE. WE MUST DO WHAT IT TAKES TO SURVIVE. with the fucking crunching and screaming in the background lik e ok. I needed this in my life.

4. mutiny

THIS IS MY FAVORITE. eurolychus’ confrontation with begging odysseus to tell him hes misinterpreted the situation, comparing odysseus’ past actions and fights to how he dealt with scylla, finally ending with him yelling at odysseus to “SAY SOMETHING!”, odysseus’ “I CANT.” and the looong pause before the boss battle starts. odysseus and eurolychus’ fight, both of them clearly not wanting to but knowing they have to. the chanting their name in the background. and then when odysseus says “I am not letting you get in my way!” and the sound of a stab- I was so scared hed actually killed eurolychus(yes I knew he dies I watched the overly sarcastic productions video on the odyssey too) and then ODYSSEYUS’ labored breathing and asking “why?” like I’m sorry jorge DID THEY STAB YOU TO GET THIS LYRIC WHY DOES HIS PHYSICAL PAIN SOUND SO GENUINE and then the. the fucking. the fucking luck runs out reprise. the MOMENT I realized it was the melody from luck runs out this is when I started crying.(dw past me it gets worse) the way that the crew is basically like “yeah remember when we asked what would happen if you fucked up? well you fucked up. and now youre finding out.” plus the fact that they are so clearly driving home we dont trust you. you failed to keep us safe. basically telling him ‘youre a bad leader’. that must have HURT. and then the fact that eurolychus bandaged him up and was waiting for him to wake up ough my heart. but also the fact that hes tied to helios’ statue? like. um. buddy. looking an awful lot like a sacrafice there. hahahahahah I’m loosing it. anyways, the luck runs out reprise hitting hard once again. like HARD. holy shit, odysseus’ “please don’t tell me you’re about to do what i think you’ll do” when that was what eurylochus said to him and then EURYLOCHUS CALLED HIM “ODY” I CANT and the eurylochus clearly being fed up(but not fed) while odysseus is actually begging him to please please think about this you can HEAR the desperation the need to get home and knowing if eurylochus kills the cow they probably wont? and then odysseus’ scream of “euRYLOCHUS NO!” cut short by the sound of eurylochus killing the cattle. and then the instant ‘oh no.’ like just INSTANTLY knowing they’re fucked and eurylochus STILL LOOKING TOWARD ODYSSEUS FOR GUIDENCE EVEN THO HE LITERALLY MUTINIED AGAINST HIM LIKE A DAY AGO AND HAS ODYSSEUS TIED UP AND AT HIS MIRCY AND HE STILL DEFAULTS TOWARDS ODYSSEUS FOR LEADERSHIP CAUSE HE STILL TRUSTS HIM and odysseus IMMEDIATELY taking charge and trying to get them out. the rushed full speed ahead melody, the boom of thunder and odysseus’ dread-filled “we’re too late.”

5. thunder bringer

IT LIVED UP TO THE HYPE GUYS!! sure enough the teasers we’ve seen are FUCKING AMAZING in the context of the song, zeus having an inflated as shit ego and taking up SO MUCH space, just like constantly talking about himself even tho IT AINT ABT HIM its so in character for what a massive dick he usually is in the greek mythos. and zeus deadass saying “if i were to make you choose, the lives of your men and crew or your own why do I think theyd loose?” right before MAKING ODYSSEUS CHOOSE. I’m. also odysseus sounds so.. small in this song. I dont know if its the fact hes literally having a mental breakdown or that zeus needs to be the biggest cock in any room he walks into but odysseus’ little “choose?” and him asking “please dont make me do this” JUST LIKE WHEN HIM AND ZEUS FIRST MET, the when does a man become a monster melody playing as odysseus tries to decide with penelopes voice asking him to come home pushing him over the edge wow. just wow. and the the conversation between odysseus and eurylochus? “captain?” “I have to see her.” “…but we’ll die.” “i know” I’m SORRY I CANT FUCKING DO THIS WHY DOES HE SOUND SO BROKEN AND REGRETFUL AND SAD AND OH MY GOD. AND THEN THE FUCKING ANIMATIC SHOWN IN THE TRAILER THE WAY HE JUST POINTS TOWARDS HIS CREW AND THEY ALL LOOK SO BETRAYED AND LOST BEFORE THEY START ATTACKING HIM AND THE LAST SHOT OF HIM CLOSING HIS EYES AS THEY PIN HIM TO THE MAST BY THE NECK WITH THEIR SWORDS AND THEN LIGHTNING STRIKES THE SHIP HOLY. also if you think about it this choice was kind of the final stress test for odysseus, because this is the ultimate decision: should he be a good king, captain, and friend or should he take the small chance to see his wife again? cause its not just about who lives and dies, its about who gets to keep going, who gets to see home, who gets a chance and who looses right now. and how could he choose the people who just stabbed him in the back and have doomed them multiple times over seeing his wife whom he loves and would do anything for? honestly, with what I know about how odysseus is, I wouldnt be very surprised if he was weighing the choice both from the emotional (seeing his wife or saving his crew) and factual (hes probably the strongest and most fit leader among them, they might not do too well on their own, ithaca needs a king and he doesnt know if telemachus can be that, one person has a higher chance of surviving than a large group in a journey(ingreekmythologyanyway), and they did just make a really dumb mistake that odysseus wouldnt have made himself and yeah ok maybe hes a little salty but still.)

genuinly the whole saga is so amazing and I’m so looking forward to the wisdom, vengence, and ESPECIALLY ithaca saga. by the way I could actually do this for every song in the musical/every saga tbh

thanks for coming to my tedtalk, I fucking love epic: the musical

[perpetually-sad-but-its-fine]

chicago pd 10x11

GUYS

IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS EPISODE

I WANNA LEARN MORE ABOUT KEVIN

WE GET TO MEET HIS DADDDD

ahhhh

im so nervous

oh yippee

it start w/ a funeral

im already invested

‘its all politics kev’

‘okay, i hear you over there being a cynic’

but is she wrong kev?

is she wrong?

no

she's not

oh no

NO

COME ON

KIM

THEY CANT LEAVE HER ALONE

and oh my god

chicago pd writers not ignoring the trauma that kim went through????

*gasp*

that's a first

‘its just too much caffeine’

‘mhm’

kev not buying her bullshit

i miss my patrol buddies

back when they were so innocent

‘i raise you, its a little bit of both’

‘mhm’

best buddies

ahhhhhh

KEV AND KIM GETTING TOGETHER AND SHARING THEIR FAMILY

I LOVE ITTTT

I WANNA SEE IT SO BADLY

ohhhh

this is his father isn’t it????

ITS HIS FATHER

OH MY GOD

I KNEW ITTTTT

I FUCKIN KNEW IT

aw no

im not prepared for this

aw kim looking out for kev and kev looking out for him

i love it so much

oh my god what the fuck

THAT CAR CAME OUT OF NO WHERE

OF COURSE IT STARTS SHOOTING

OF COURSE

my god

bro

come on

kev’s vest isn't even on properly

I DONT WANNA THEM TO GET HURT CUZ THEY DIDNT PUT ON THEIR VESTS PROPERLY

kev looking for his dad

im not prepared for this angst

please tell me he doesn't do something stupid and delete the photo

kev is a good cop

oh noooo

hes close to crying

noooooooo

my baby

my poor baby

‘for good behavior’

im excited to find out why that's such a surprise

kev doing his job like a good cop

we love to see it

oh no kev

what're you gonna do now???

IS HE GONNA TELL VOIGHT

ohhhh that poor boy

this poor child

i feel so bad for this kid

oh kim letting kev take the lead

we love to see it

KEVINS SO SWEET

hes so understanding

and i love him

so so so so so much

hes amazing

chicago pd please give kevin a good storyline

please give him a love interest that deserves him

please let him be happy

please

oh this big guy is gonna be kevin’s father i can feel it

oh nvm

torresssss

my bby

adammmmmm

my loveeeeeee

haILEY

SHES SO PRETTYYYYYYYY

im not okay

im not

BURZEK

my babies

please let them be okay this season

ohhhhh

this is gonna be an interesting conversation

kevin and adam and kim are besties

and i want them to spend more time together

‘i'll let you know, promise’

‘oookay?’

he says very confusedly but lets her go anyway

kim looKS SO FUCKIN GOOD

oh we love to see the patrol babies looking out for each other

voight and atwater

the father-son duo that we love

see, this is why i love kevin

hes a sweetheart who's doing his best

he recognizes when to lie and when to tell the truth

he knows the value of his job and doesn't want to unnecessarily endanger that just bcuz he doesn't like the truth of whatever’s happening

he has strict morals that he follows and he acknowledges that he makes mistakes and knows that he can improve

he also

doeSNT FUCKIN KEEP SECRETS FROM VOIGHT

FUCKIN EVERYBODY ELSE

FROM ANTONIO TO JAY TO HAILEY TO KIM TO VANESSA TO ADAM TO ERIN TO AL

E V E R Y O N E

HAS KEPT SOMETHING FROM VOIGHT

EVEN TORRES HAS

THE WHOLE THING WITH DETECTIVE DICK LAST EPISODE????

YEAH HE KEPT THAT FROM VOIGHT

KEVIN IS THE ONLY ONE

WHO

HASNT

LIED

TO

VOIGHT

he deserves so much better

and ik for a FACT

that chicago pd writers are going to ruin his character

i fuckin know it

okay

back to me being dramatic about the show

now

voight is asking questions about kevin’s father and im interested

poor kevin

he deserves so much better

voight looking out for him is so sweet

‘ill tell ‘em’

is amazing

bcuz the team is his family

the family that he deserves

and the family that loves him

god im so nervous for this part

oH MY GOD

THEY HAVENT SAID ANYTHING

BUT IM ALREADY CRYING

ohhhhhh

im so scared for how this is gonna go

this conversation is unsettling to me

‘i know that's not the truth’

come on man

tell himmm

TELL HIM THE TRUTH

poor kevin

they keep hurting him

and me

i can't

kevin can never get a break can he?

thank you kevin’s father

oH SO NOW YOU WANNA ASK ABOUT JORDAN AND VANESSA???

NOW YOU WANNA ASK

oh mY GOD

laroyce hawkins is an amazing actor

that break in his voice kills me

oooo

this'll be fun

ITS ONLY FIFTEEN MINUTES INTO THE EPISODE AND SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED

oH MY GOD

THATS SO FUCKIN VIOLENT

HOLY SHIT

oh nooooo

thERES A BABY

THAT POOR CHILD

AWWWWW

I WANNA CRY WITH THIS KID

THIS POOR POOR BABY

aw kevin covering the child of this baby

im soft

'emphatic no’

we love to hear it

kevin

my poor sweet child

kim doing her best to distract kevin and then giving up and just straight up asked him

we love it

i wanna see kim and kev and adam go out for drinks and talk about the terrible shit that's gone on in their lives and i want kevin to be okay

i need it actually

god

im dying here

chicago pd writers need to stop hurting me

seriously

im too sensitive for this

oh no

his dad’s here isn't he

oh fuck you kevin’s dad

fuck you

how dare you

kevin still doing his job

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

kevinnnnnnn

im so sorry my love

kevin my dearest child

i must hold and comfort

i must

goddamnit kevin’s dad

you better be telling the truth

why do i feel like hes hiding something

GODDAMMIT KEVIN’S DAD

YOU WERENT EVEN THERE FOR MAJORITY OF HIS LIFE

YOU DID SOMETHING STUPID

AND THEN HIS MOM DIED

AND HE HAD TO RAISE VANESSA AND JORDAN

AND YOU WANNA PLAY THE GUILT CARD????

NAH MAN 

YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF

‘do i look angry right now? i don't got time for that.’

mY POOR CHILD

stop this hurt

stop it

hes juST

nO

I HATE THIS

SO MUCH

poOR KEVIN

adam and kevin

my loves

they are brothers

kevin

please

for the love of god

TALK TO ADAM

kev

the fuck are you doing

kevin

please

ik hes doing his job

but like

I DONT WANT HIM TO GET HURT

voight looking out for kev

again

I love it

THE USAGE OF HIS FIRST NAME

GODDAMMIT

torres

my boy

kev and dante

i love it

dante reassuring kevins father

idk how to feel about that

TORRES IS STEPPING UP

MY BOY

this meet is scaring me

oh wait

kevin’s father is telling the truth

oh my god

he was telling the truth

waIT

HOLD ON

OH MY GOD

SO HE WAS A GOOD FATHER??????

this meet isn't gonna end well

danteeee

ma boi

i love you

god 

i love him so much

hes great

ilovehim

now i feel bad for kevin’s father

im not okay

aw my poor kevin

my poor child

my poor poor child

‘hm’

‘hm’

we love the communication guys

adam and kim

looking out for their brother

i want a heart to heart with them

but i also don't trust kevin’s dad

im conflicted

WHY WONT THEY MAKE KEVIN HAPPY

WHY

oh comE ON

thEY WERE STARTING TO TALK IT OUT

GODDAMMIT

STOP

I DONT LIKE THIS

*gasp*

waIT

IS KEVIN’S DAD GONNA DIE?????

I DONT WANT HIM TO DIE

I DONT LIKE HIME

BUT I DONT WANT HIM TO DIE

i dont like how this is playing out

kevin’s dad, tf are you doing man

torres

be smart

oh good god

im too scared to watch this

‘i get the whole story playboy’

bitch i will smack you

upton and ruzek in sync

thEY BOTH GOT OFF THE BENCH AT THE SAME TIME AND IN THE SAME WAY

I CANT BE THE ONLY ONE WHO SAW THAT

bruh what is this nonsense

whats happening

im noT READY

god

kevin’s dad is gonna die

i can feel it in my bones

they won't let kev be happy

they never will

goDDAMMIT

IM NOT PREPARED FOR THIS

thiS IS SO INTENSE

AUGEVPIWE

IM NOT READY

trudyyyyy

my mother who raised me

i need more of her

ooooooo

ITS SO INTERESTING

come on

please don't kill kevin’s father

kevin

please tell me that youre thinking clearly

kim’s face just reads ‘somebody fucked with my best friend and they’re gonna die today’

and we love her for it

where the hell is kevin’s father

where is he

whERE

W H E R E

oh thank god

hes there

hes not dead (yet)

can't wait to see how this goes

‘i aint never seen him before in my life’

adorable

so believable

kevin’s dad

please

be reasonable

god

i can't handle this angst

I cannot

im not strong enough

nowhere near strong enough

god

please

this is K I L L I N G  M E

kevin

please

im crying

im sobbing actually

my poor child

finally admitting his feelings

my poor baby

please

solve this

its too much

kevin’s dad please

im begging you

OH MY GOD

STOP IT

HIS VOICE IS CRACKING

AND IM BREAKING

I NEED HIM TO BE OKAY

oh shit

this is

stop

stop

stop

stop

stop

stop

stop

no

no

no

no

no

no

no

no

no

no

COME ON

THIS IS SO MUCH HURT

THE LOOK IN KEVINS EYES

THERE ARE TEARS

AND IM FULLY SOBBING

OH MY GOD

COM E O N

his voice

stOP

PLEASE

thiS IS NO LONGER A JOKE

IM FUCKIN SOBBING

PLEASE JUST GIVE KEVIN A LOVING FATHER

HE DESERVES IT

LAROYCE HAWKINS IS AN AMAZING FUCKIN ACTOR

AND HIS PERFORMANCE IS MAKING ME CRY

P L E A S E

SIR

kevin’s dad im so sorry i ever doubted you

please hug

please

cOME ON

NO

‘it was too late, son’

im numb

i. feel. nothing. 

THEY DIDNT EVEN HUG

GODDAMMIT

stop

PLEASE

THIS POOR CHILD

THIS POOR MAN

HE WAS FORCED TO GROW UP TO RAISE HIS SIBILINGS

AND HE LOST HIS FATHER

AND HIS MOTHER

AND HE HAD TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING

AND HES STILL NOT HAPPY?????

CHICAGO PD WRITERS

DO YOU ENJOY MY PAIN??????

ITS NOT FUCKIN FUNNY MAN

[rint4rous]

hogwarts au! oikawa

a/n: wrote this with a bad headache LMAO so if you see mistakes no you didnt <3

yeah help

anyway

oikawa toru

sixth year slytherin

captain of slytherin quidditch team

this one. very popular with the girls.

always gets gifts and confessed to, he turns them all down nicely tho

he flirts with them a little but never goes out with anyone

thanks but no thanks, hes focusing on quidditch

mostly hangs out with hanamaki, matsukawa, and iwaizumi

you, sixth year gryffindor

a chaser for the quidditch team

actually you and oikawa had a bit of a rivalry thing going on

because oikawa was getting good grades AND is good at quidditch

and it doesnt even look like hes trying.

and he lowkey comes off as arrogant sometimes

and youre like i hate geniuses

the two of you met during first year when he tried playfully hitting iwa in the hallway but iwa dodged

and you happen to be speedwalking past and then next thing you know you get slapped???

you stop walking and turn to oikawa

hes like HOLY CRAPDFHJSHJR

“I AM SO SORRY-”

“it’s alright!”

“are you sure??”

“yeah, it was an accident, right? …. unless it wasnt?”

“NO I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT”

“i thought so! see you ‘round!”

then you skip away

yeah. yall dont really start competing and shit until you found out your mom and his mom had BEEF??? WHEN THEY WERE IN SCHOOL????

you found that out at the end of first year

“i heard tachibana’s son is in your year. or i guess she’s oikawa now.”

youre like yeah what about it

“my dearest y/n, you’re a smart little girl, okay?”

“so make sure you’re better than that oikawa kid, alright?”

and little innocent you is like “ok”

so start of second year, you study and work extra hard

but here’s perfect little oikawa who always knocks you down to second place

at first youre like. i’ll just work harder!

and he joins quidditch and so do you

so you try hard at that too

you’re not like a sore loser or anything so when slytherin wins you shake his hand with a smile

but by the end of the year you’re just kinda :/ now because you never see him studying or practicing spells so how the fuck is he BETTER THAN YOU AT EVERYTHING!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!!

third year you come into school with like not very good feelings abt oikawa

and your mom was on your ass about your grades and you’re like omfggg im TRYING OKAY IM TRYING SO HARD

too bad tho thats when he starts liking you …

middle of third year is when you start expressing those feelings for oikawa out loud

“i hate self-centered geniuses. come back down to earth, will you.”

he heard you say when test results came back

and hes like is she talking abt me? lol nah shes probably talking about stupid ushijima over there

and then he finds out you were in fact talking abt him

hes kinda hurt lol

then when the new term rolls in

and the two of you just start talking shit about each other and start arguing all the time

“what’s the answer, l/n?”

“fairy wings.”

“oh my bad, i didn’t realize she said oikawa, and not l/n.”

“oh sorry, i thought you wouldn’t know the answer so i answered for you! i saved you from embarrassing yourself. you’re welcome~”

your seatmate yaku was holding you down with all his might and HOW IS LITTLE MAN ABLE TO HOLD YOU BACK HIS GRIP IS STRONG BRO

the whole class s ighs here we go AGAIN

the teacher doesnt even bother sending you guys out to hall anymore because this happens so much

you always try to sabotage each other in potions

one time his eyebrows almost burned off after his potion exploded in his face

makki and mattsun like LMFAOWFEHERGUYER

then when the year ends you’re like ranting to your mom like “i hate geniuses. who does he think he is? just because he can beat me at everything?? i’ll show him. i’ll make him eat dirt in the field. i’ll wipe that dumb smirk off his face. i’ll-”

your mom: omg my little baby so full of hate just like her momma

fourth year you’re so determined to beat oikawa at something

he sees you in the library, unprovoked, once and he comes up from behind you like

“aw, is l/n gonna try beating me again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

you: hold it in hold it in hold it in YOU’RE MATURE NOW Y/N L/N. YOU SHOULD BE MORE MATURE THAN THIS DIMWIT IN FRONT OF YOU. inhale exhale inhale exhale

“aw, is oikawa gonna try beating ushiwaka in quidditch again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

way to be mature

poor oikawa tho you pressed a wrong button so he just leaves silently

you kinda regret it after

so this year goes like the last and so does the next

“arent you tired?? of competing with oikawa all the time??” your friend semi asked you

“kind of”

“then stop?? you dont have to fulfill your mom’s high school revenge lmao”

“ughh eita i know but im too far in”

one time you were out breaking curfew #savage

no but seriously you couldn’t sleep so you thought some fresh air will help, the dorms were super suffocating right now

you were stressed after your mom’s monthly letter

beat oikawa this beat oikawa that

you turn at a corner and you see the man himself, ALSO BREAKING CURFEW

now the both of you are looking at each other like 👁👄👁

“GOD L/N I THOUGHT YOU WERE A TEACHER I NEARLY DIED FROM A HEART ATTACK”

“shush before we both get caught”

“right sorry sorry”

“so what the hell are you doing breaking curfew.”

“what are you doing breaking curfew.”

“i asked you first”

“so?”

“just answer the question, oikawa.”

he looks around, making sure the coast was clear before he motions you over to him and as you walk towards him

you see the door hes standing in front of

he drags you in there and what you see is

a bunch of practice dummies

“yeah i,, practice my spells here at night. contrary to popular belief i’m not a genius like ushiwaka or tobio. i’m flattered you think so, though.”

and youre like he... actually practices?? he is actually human?

“what’s with that look? you wanna join me practice at night?”

“as if-” and then you see the book of spells and you guys aren’t even learning any of this YET. and you are determined not to fall behind oikawa “sure.”

oikawas like pardon?

you: i SAID SURE.

and so now at night you practice spells together

only because you want to beat him as if

the arguing goes down a little because you get caught up in beating each other at who gets to do the spell right first that practice runs super late sometimes and you dont have energy to fight with each other that early

everybodys like ??? huh????

but then you’re back to the usual bs in the afternoon and everybodys like oh okay so the world isnt ending yet

so anyway !! yall are practicing again

you’re pointing your wand at a practice dummy and trying to focus so you dont accidentally do something dumb

"hey why do you hate me so much?”

LITERALLY CATCHES YOU OFF GUARD AND BREAKS YOUR FOCUS

“it’s not because i hit you when we were first years right? it really was an accident i swear-”

“you still remember that?”

“well yeah… because i cant think of any other reason why you don’t like me.”

“um… trying too hard to please my mom, i guess. what about you? why did you try so hard to beat me at everything?” you ask, regaining your focus for the charm

“idk, you never paid attention to me unless i did.”

you scoff, “why? you don’t like me or anything, do you?”

“i do tho??”

he literally said that just before you chanted the spell and you got caught off guard and

“stupefy!”

it almost hits oikawa

oikawa: WHAT DID I DO

you: SHITHEAD DONT SAY THAT WHEN IM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHFIBEFH

“HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN???”

“I DONT KNOW IT WAS FUN COMPETING WITH YOU WHEN WE WERE SECOND YEARS AND IT JUST DID?? I TRIED SO HARD SO I CAN IMPRESS YOU AND I GUESS MY PLAN BACKFIRED BECAUSE I DONT THINK YOU LIKE ME VERY MUCH”

now youre staring at each other and you’re both red

he kinda quiets down “and you’re a better rival than ushijima anyway. i don’t mean any of the stuff i said, i swear. i know you don’t like me but i just needed to let that out or i will go insane.”

and hes just looking down all shy

at this point you actually dont know if you like oikawa or not

i mean??? you spent like 3 years butting heads with this dude

and he liked you the whole time?? hes crazy this man is crazy.

maybe you were just in denial the whole time

because?? you could’ve stopped competing with him at everything

maybe you did enjoy it somehow

he did make your life at school interesting

“let’s go out on a few dates and we’ll see.”

his head just whips up and his eyes like light up and hes so EXCITED

in the time before you officially started dating

you find out from iwaizumi that even tho he smiles at a lot of girls its actually rarely genuine the only girl hes ever seen oikawa smile about genuinely was you

and that his mom actually didnt approve of him playing quidditch at first because he had a bad knee but he pushed for it because he really wanted to

he has like a smug and a flippant demeanor but hes very attentive and super caring !!

hes super passionate and hard working at what he does and

i guess now you finally realize you are falling

it takes five dates until the two of you officially start going out

if you tell third year you that you were dating oikawa she would never believe it but here you are, walking to class with him

when the two of you walked in the classroom talking

like TALKING NORMALLY AND NOT THE USUAL “i will choke you in your sleep” “ooh, kinda k-” “don’t”

it was already sus when the arguing toned down a bit but now that its like. REALLY GONE?? everybody is so confused

LMFAO matsukawa asks like “what happened?? are you guys broken?”

“no???”

“how rude! dearest y/n and i are dating now!”

everybody in this class: see now thats crazy. that is crazy.

makki: maybe we didnt hear him right. say that again oikawa

oikawa: me and y/n are dating.

everybody: oh okay bc we thought you said you and l/n were dat- WAIT SO YOU AND L/N REALLY ARE TOGETHER??? 

you: unfortunately

oikawa: h-hey :((((

everybody: SO WE DONT GOTTA LISTEN TO YALL ARGUE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING??? YOU HAVE TO TREAT THE WHOLE CLASS TO BUTTERBEER I THINK WE DESERVE IT AFTER THESE THREE YEARS OF CONSTANT YELLING

nobody was as SHOCKED as your moms

“y/n, baby, i know i did not just hear you say you’re dating the oikawa kid. repeat that for momma again.”

“i’m dating the oikawa kid.”

like?? MOM THIS WAS TECHNICALLY UR FAULT

“so toru, what did you wanna tell me?”

“i have a girlfriend now! her name is y/n l/n.”

“l/n? surely not THAT l/n’s daughter, right?”

“oh it is that l/n.”

when your families have dinner together for the first time

THE TENSION LMFAO

but they do try hard to get along. they try super hard.

they start getting along because MAN YOU AND OIKAWA WERE SOO CUTE AND THEY WANT YOU TO GET MARRIED AND THEY HAVE TO GET ALONG IF THEY WANT IT TO HAPPEN. THEIR GRANDKIDS ARE GONNA BE SO CUTE!!!

“ma, we haven’t graduated yet-”

your mom, ignoring you: THEYRE GOING TO HAVE THE CUTEST HAIR

oikawa’s mom: AND THEY’RE GOING TO BE SUPER SMART LIKE THEIR PARENTS!

your mom: AND WE’LL BE THE BEST GRANDMAS.

momma oiks: PERIOD!

steals your books from you in the halls so he can carry it for you

you tease each other with pet names and shit???

he’ll try to kiss your cheek in the hall but iwa grabs the back of his robe and pulls him away “you’re gross”

“you’re just jealous iwa!!”

when your houses arent playing each other, he goes to your games and vice versa!

tries to distract you in the field

“hey beautiful”

“toru don’t or i will make iwa knock you off your broom.”

“you're so mean”

so anyways yall r couple goals

"listen well, kindaichi, kunimi, your senior is showing you how to get girls.”

kunimi, without looking up from his book: what are you gonna teach us? accidentally slap the girl and get her to hate you for three years while you secretly pine over her during that time before confessing that you liked her the whole time and you go out on five dates and officially start dating? too much work

oikawa: LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT

[merlinssaggyyfronts]

BBC Merlin Rewatch:

01x01: The Dragon’s Call

—

FIRSTLY THE FUCKING DESCRIPTION LMAO “Merlin, a young country boy” COUNTRY BOY AHAHDHSNDH IF ONLY YOU KNEW!!! ITS LIKE SETTING SOMEONE UP FOR DISASTER BUT THEN AGAIN THEY WERE SO LIKE I MEAN-

aw look at merlin all happy and smily, walking into camelot like he isnt going to witness the death of his best friend/king and basically everyone he loves

LOOK AT HIM HES SO HAPPY!!! HE DOESNT KNOW YET

“like everyone, he must live and learn” yo shut ur bitchass up lizard man u literally tried to murder everyone in camelot that one time

“his name: traumatised 😍😍”

AH YES THE OPENING!!1!1!-!-! AHHH THE AMOUNT OF HAPPINESS I FEEL HEARING THE OPENING

fuck ur bitchass uther no one likes u

“i pride myself as a fair and just king” sir didnt u like basically kill ur wife... and thousands of peo- OH MY GOD MORGANA BB ILY

oh jesus okay hes dead um chile-

“when i came to this land” wait i thought he was raised kn camelot brb i forgot im an idiot wait,,, does this mean before this it was the du bois family on the throne of camelot?? also, mired in chaos? u mean like.... before ur wife died and everyone was living peacefully? ....okay

“merlin, seeing a person who's been stated had been studying magic get beheaded: [a magical being himself] ah,, welcoming.” -my gf

“since the great dragon was captured” ....so did no one think about where they put a dragon?? a captured one at that. ud think he’d be more smart but nah he just left a random ass dragon under his castle like THAT is going to end well

YUHH MARY COLLJNS HATE HIM!!! YELL BABEY YELL!!! “you took my son!” YES MURDER HIM OMG I CAN FEEL HER PAIN

“a son for a son!” omg why couldnt u have killed uther bb ur the perfect villain i love u ur literally just a loving mother i-

OOOOO GAIUS

.....why is there a bunny mask in there

why is thERE A BUNNY MASK-

why didnt merlins eyes glow when he dragged the bed to gaius to save him

also whats this slomo magic why didnt he do this after this why did season one haveso much magic and like every other season was just everyone throwing it back

like i get instinctual magic but like.... if its instinctual wouldnt it happen more especially when his powers get stronger-

gaius: what did you just do?!

also gaius, five seconds later: i know what it was!! i just wanted to know where you learned it

merlin: 😐

merlin, about his magic: i was born like this

gaius, who knows full well warlocks exist: impossible!

(are warlocks naturally born knowing how to use magic without learning? i mean if u have to learn magic like a sorcerer then whats the difference between a warlock and a sorcerer cuz wouldnt sorcerers atleast have to have some magic in them to actually cast spells? am i dumb or do i just not get it)

wait so merlin arrived in camelot on a wednesday

merlin, walking into camelot: it is wednesday my dudes

merlin: [witnesses an execution] aaaAAAAAA-

“someone that might help him find a purpose of his gifts” oh honey he’ll get something mUCH LARGER THAN THAT-

—

oH MORGANA

SHUT UR BITCHASS UTHER SHE WILL KILL YOU-

“the more brutal you are, the more enemies you’ll create” oh the waY SHE PREDICTED THEIR FUTURE OO

ah bless u lady helen/mary collins we love them spicy villains

...why do you have a dressing table in a tent

[watches mary collins murder lady helen] i never snitch on dadd- ...someone pls delete me

merlin, about his instinctual magic: i just do it!

gaius: ...lord have mercy what did i just sign myself up to

what ever happened to sir olwen did he die from accidentally overdosing

—

oHHH THERE HE IS THERE HE IS THERES MY BOY!!! MY LIL PRAT MAN!!!!

merlin looks so offended, oh god i could watch this whole scene for HOURS

oooOOOO YES MERLIN FUCK HIM UP!!! SHOW HIM WHOS BOSS

“do i know you?” “im merlin” “so i dont know you” ugh theres already sexual tension

“i would never have a friend who could be such an ass” “or i one so stupid”

also them, ten years later: “i use my magic for you arthur, only you” “just hold me” “i cant lose him! hes my friend!” “thank you..”

“tell me merlin, do you know how to walk on your knees?” OOOOH THE BOYS ARE FLIRTING

NOT THE “would you like me to help you?” SIR YOU ARE FLIRTING SO INTENSELY AND DONT EVEN REALISE IT SIR DO YOU KNOW YOURE FALLING IN LOVE

im convinced atleast half the knights with arthur were like “ayo thas kinda sus bro 😳😳 ayo 😳😳”

arthur: tell me merlin, do you know how to walk on your knees? would you like me to help you?

merlin: ....i really dont know how to answer that

imagine being paid to throw fruits at colin morgan omg id be so thrilled

OOOH HERE COMES OUR QUEEN GWEN!!! MY LOVE MY EVERYTHING YES ILY

gwen: well, arthur looks like one of those, save the world kinda men... and you dont

merlin, 1500 years later, having failed his destiny: well i mean you’re not wrong

—

gaius: uther banned magic a long time ago

merlin, flabbergasted as if he wasnt raised on tales of the death of his kind every day in the kingdom right next to his: why?!?!?

gaius: the dragon is imprisoned where nobody can free him

merlin:

(that is the face of someone knowing full well hes going to free that dragon. look at him. he’s already made up his mind.)

—

[sees merlin and arthur in the marketplace] oh heres he is again heres the lil bitxh ooo theyre about to FIGHT

god hes flirting so hard without even realising it, oh my god

“i could take you apart with one blow” “i could take you apart with less” um sirs this is a mcdonalds drive thru 😃

arthur: ahah, you’re in trouble now~ 😏😏

i had to pause cuz wHAT THE HELL WHY DOES HE SOUND LIKE THAT-

—

....yall are yelling very loudly, um, arent there guards near yall? people passing by? please relax

“im just a nobody, and i always will be” OH IF ONLY YOU KNEWWW

“if i cant use magic, i might as well die” ....well, ive got a surprise for you-

“maybe theres someone with more magic than me?” like... a whole dragon? i mean if you say so 👀

merlin about why he was born like this: if you cant tell me, no one can!

a fucking dragon, basically every magical creature and the druids: WELL-

the camelot guards are so stupid how the hell is this kingdom still standing

how does kilgharrah know merlins name? in prophecy hes known as emrys (and we see basically every magical being call him emrys and not merlin,, i think). so how does he know? did he stretch his neck long enough that he could somehow hear merlin? is it cuz theyre kin? is it cuz merlin and gaius were yelling so loudly that kilgharrah could hear them all the way in his cave? ig we’ll never know 🖐

merlin: where are you?!

kilgharrah:

kilgharrah: without you, arthur will never succeed.

merlin: ....oh look, im already paranoid

the amount of sadness i feel hearing kilgharrah say “none of us can choose our destiny, merlin. and none of us can escape it” is INSANE cuz in season one you can SEE merlin trying to escape it. hes doing his damned best trying to have some control over his life. and then in later seasons you can see the light slowly drain from his eyes as he becomes just another toy for the gods to be entertained by. he realises he cant control a single thing about his life so he does the one thing he can: protect arthur. and he loses SO MUCH because of it! its not fair, he deserved so much, and when he finally got everything he could ever ask for, it was taken away from him by his own mistakes.

arthur, seeing morgana in a beautiful dress: god have mercy 😍

uther: .....um

the way they set arthur and morgana up as if they arent gonna make them siblings i- what the fawk 😄

person A, who knows arthurian lore: oh no! arthur is going to have an affair with morgan(a) and have mordred! oh no!!

person B, whos seen merlin: oh no in this show its worse

person B, knowing full well theyre siblings: much worse....

gwen: who’d wanna marry arthur? 🙄

-

gwen, getting crowned queen of camelot: well fuck

hhhnghnh yes queen sing them to sleep yes murder his bitchass (and fail but like its the thought that counts)

on a sidenote tho this is such a fun way to murder someone, id try this

the absolutely OFFENDED “FATHER!” and the horrified look in arthurs eyss when uther announced merlin would be his manservant is PRICELESS OMG

oh the way uther unintentionally plants the first seed of his sons love story omg 😍😍

Conclusion: this episode is a 10/10 greatest episode with so many iconic scenes omg. mary collins u will forever have my heart for unintentionally kickstarting merlin and arthurs relationship destiny. i loved the whole thing and oh GOD does it already hurt knowing full well how the show ends

[tendoki]

hug prompt 5 with tendouuuu

┏━━━━━━•❅•°•❈•°•❅•━━━━━━┓

angy tendou kinda makes me 😳 ngl. this has a lot of build up? I left the ending VAGUE because it just seemed right yanno? this was fun and cute to write though :)

┗━━━━━━•❅•°•❈•°•❅•━━━━━━┛

Tendou . S - Snapmaps

-> genre: comfort

-> prompt: angry hug (not at eachother)

-> warnings: swearing, reader is lowkey horny for tendou, again I wrote this at 5am and projected my thirst onto y/n so my bad lollll, bad grammar maybe?? dunno

not sponsored by snapchat <3

He was pissed off.

Like, super pissed off. You could see it in the way his shoulders were tensed and how his leg bounced under the desk, the furrow of his brows and dark lines under his eyes screamed 'i am three minutes away from committing a murder'. His breathing seemed to be heavier too; and you guessed you wouldnt get much of a chance to talk to him once class was over if the way his eyes seemed to flicker to the clock every few seconds was any indication.

You werent anyone particularly close to Tendou Satori, though you'd consider the two of you friends if asked. In truth, you never thought you would get this far with him, the guy seemed to disregard anything that his teammates werent already fond of; you were lucky, in a sense, that as Goshiki's tutor you were deemed worthy of his attention.

Of course, occasionally your mind would slip, sliding down a dangerous path of 'what if?'s and 'why not?'s. Tendou was attractive, in that weird way, where your friends sorta make fun of you for liking him, before they turn and take a second look themselves. He intrigued you, the way he was so observant as to even bag a friendship with the ever elusive Ushijima kun.

You supposed that's why you bothered to chase him after class ended.

You had lost him pretty quickly though, thinking about it, you seriously wondered how in the hell you could lose a six foot, two inch, scarlet haired loudmouth like Tendou, as if slipping into a crowd and being invisible was something he was used to (something else to add onto the 'Mysteries of T.S' list you had compiled).

After escaping the crowd and seeing no sign of him outside, you relented, recognising that this was a losing battle. With a huff, you pulled out your phone to check his snap maps; he'd always turn them on once he got into school, claiming that it was to make sure if he skipped practice then Semi could track him down and beat his ass with no hassle.

Ramen shop

For the better, you were starving anyway. immediately picking up the pace, you took the 10 minute walk it would take to get there.

how did he manage to go so fast? damn him and his stupid long legs

You arrived, and the place looked empty, probably because of the sign on the door, stating that it was closed for the day. Looking down at your phone again, you confirmed that this was the right address, seeing your own bitmoji stood near Tendou's.

Then the door opened, Tendou, in all of his sweaty, (guess he mustve ran) brilliance, looked you up and down, an action you're ashamed to admit caused a jolt in your stomach. He looked suprised to see you here, but seeing your phone lit up with the familiar interface of Snapchat maps, he smirked.

"What brings you here?"

He sounded amused, though you could still hear his aggravation in how throaty his voice was, you werent used to hearing him speak so roughly, and part of you wondered what it would take to hear that kind of tone from him more.

"You uh seemed pissed off earlier, in class? and I wanted to check up on you. Why... are you in an empty, closed ramen shop?"

"Family owned joint, 's empty 'cause we're closed, and its closed 'cause it's empty"

"Doesn't closing it because its empty make for bad business practice? you're not even giving people a chance to enter, Tendou"

He jolted at this, you were usually so formal and appropriate with him, that hearing you challenge his logic so openly and speak without honorifics was unexpected; his shoulders sagged a little, tension easing from his body as a bemused smile made it's way across his face.

"Huh, guess you're right. Well, since ya here how 'bout coming in and taste testing some of our food before we open to the public again, for safety", the last line was spoken differently, as if he was daring you to say yes, like agreeing on a totally-not-date with Tendou Satori would be the worst mistake of your life.

So, naturally, you bit right back.

"You askin' me on a date now, Satori?", using him first name was dangerous, but you figured he'd get the message that you were trying to be playful, while giving him the ultimate choice of what would happen next.

Once again he was taken aback, before another sag of his shoulders and spread of a smile took over his body; he wasted no time in gently grabbing you by the elbow and ushering you inside.

The interior was gorgeously decorated, the tables scrubbed clean and the whole place smelt like heaven, Tendou sat you down on the nearest chair and rushed off to the back, promising to make you a ramen anyone would consider to be 'better than sex'

It was an hour later you still sat in the shop, laughing with Tendou about whatever tiktok trend he had roped his team into this week, you had texted your parents to let them know you were with a friend, not keen on making them worry and get the entirety of the Miyagi police force interrupting your totally-is-a-date.

Things were quiet for a moment, as you sat and drank some pop Tendou had offered you. You took the silence as an opportunity to appreciate the view; Tendou Satori, in the golden light of a 6pm sun, with his hair down in sweatpants and a graphic tee designed off of one of his favourite anime. You had been nervous when he excused himself to change and 'let his hair relax', but now thanked every and any god in existence for giving you the chance to see him looking so dearly delectable.

Your thought process was disrupted, however, when your eye candy spoke;

"Thanks. For coming, I mean. I've had a pretty shitty day and it means a lot to be sat here joking around with you"

He smiled at you, an intimate one, not mocking or sardonic in anyway, you, of course, locked this moment into your mind, committing the gentle red of his bitten and chapped lips, sloping so carefully, to memory.

Then you registered his words, your brows pinching together in concern, as you reached across and grabbed his hand.

"You wanna talk about it? I'm here to listen and I dont have anywhere to be for the time being"

He looked shocked for a moment, scanning your face to maybe check if this was some cruel joke, like he was going to start telling you and you'd laugh and walk away. After a few moments had passed of him studying your expression, he turned, heaving a sigh and standing up to go to the back, presumably preparing another two bowls of ramen.

He returned not long after, placing the bowls on your table, he began pacing, annoyance rushing back to him as he recalled what had him wound up so tightly earlier.

"... and now he's back in town! God, whatever, I just hope his stupid ass doesnt end up in the same classes as me, I dont wanna see that prick's face again", he had been bullied as a child it seemed, a detail that explained most of the contents in your list of Tendou mysteries, the bully was back in town, and your companion had ran into him when he had left school grounds for a moment; it seemed the boy's attitude had not changed, he had recognised Tendou and began layering on the taunts once more.

He was mad again, you could see it in how his shoulders tensed and his mouth now curled into an ugly sneer while venting.

You sighed before standing up, he needed some comfort, and the worst that could happen is that he pushes you away. You could always just excuse it by saying you have an affectionate family or friend group, and that it's just nature by now to give someone a hug when they're upset. Though there was every reason to think that he wouldnt fall for that, and you could make him uncomfortable. After such a huge leap in your progress with him, taking such a big risk is hardly smart or sensible-

fuck it.

But before you could move, his arms instead encased you. His body shook with brimming rage as he burrowed his head into the crook of your neck, bending awkwardly to properly reach. Hesitantly, you reached your arms up, one hand going to rub circles across his back and the other pulling and playing with the red locks of hair by the nape of his neck. The two of you stayed like that for a while, you leaning on the table once your legs got too wobbly to be trusted. Every so often you'd press a kiss to his shoulder, letting him know that you were accepting his affection wholeheartedly, not just reciprocating out of pity.

Despite the hug lasting longer than any other hugs you had given to friends and family, it still felt like it was too soon as Tendou began to pull away, standing back to his full height, though, his arms remained around you.

"Thanks, I needed that"

"yeah, uh, no problem, Tendou kun"

[nanbaka-82]

No one asked and no one will probably read but here’s songs that remind me of some of my most beloved hypmic boyos (Yes I wrote this at five am and I was being biased) Alert this is very long and shitty don’t read if ya don’t wanna get a brain rot and I advise you not to break your mind before 2nd drb.

Bonus up top:

All Stars + Kotonohoto:

- This Is The Moment - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

CLASSIC LOVE IT KEEP GETTING DRB VIBES

- I’m Ready - AJR

THIS IS LIKE DIVISION ALL STARS VS KOTONOHOTO

Yotsutsuji:

- Three Thirty - AJR

IM NOT SURE ABOUT THIS ONE AT ALL but since he’s a character that we never really got to understand and analyze, or maybe the fact that he was put falsely into his comatose state pains me.

“You start thinking about the clock ticks, you get nervous, you start stressing, so how am I supposed to fit this, in three minutes, and thirty seconds?”

“Listen to my aching heart. Quick before you skip the song. We are human after all. And we. Don’t. Stay. For. Long”

Naughty Dialogue/MCD +:

- Bang - AJR 

JUST LOVE THE VIBE 

“I’m way too young to lie here forever (IchiKuko) I’m way too old to try so whatever (SamaSasa) so come hang! We’ll go out with a bang!”

- Partners in crime - ft. Ash Costello

The vibe too! Idk I really like it!

- A Bud Like You - AJR

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH IT FITS THEM EVEN MORE HELL YES

Naughty Busters: 

- Rope - Kulick

“I keep slipping on down but I can’t let go yet”

Pain 

- Kids In The Dark - All Time Low 

 “They left us alone, the kids in the dark, to burn out forever or light up a spark, we come together, state of the art, we’ll never surrender, so let the the world sing”

More pain but cute 

Mad Comic Dialogue:

- I’m Not Ok - Weathers 

HHHHH THIS SONG IS ONE OF MY FAVES

“IM JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE FUCKED UP LIKE EVERYONE ELSE”

- Weak - AJR 

“But I’m weak, and what’s wrong with that? Boy oh boy I love it when I fall for that” (fall for each other those Lil gay boiz)

- Broken -lovelytheband 

“I like that you’re broken broken like me, maybe that makes me a fool?” (sasa)

“I like that you’re lonely lonely like me, I could be lonely with you” (sama)

“There’s something tragic, but almost pure, think I could love you, but I’m not sure” (sama)

“It’s something wholesome, it’s something sweet, tucked in your eyes that I’d love to meet” (sasa)”

- Rose Colored Boy - Paramore 

Y e s 

- Sober Up- AJR

“Hello hello, I’m not where I’m supposed to be, I hope that you’re missing me, cuz it makes me feel young”

*Cries in SamaSasa*

“Won’t you help me sober up? Growing up had made me numb, and I wanna feel something again. Won’t you help me sober up? All the big kids say I’m drunk and I wanna feel something again. Won’t you help me feel something again... how’s it go again?”

“And I wanna feel something again. I just wanna feel something again. (My favorite color is you)”

“Can I finally feel something again?”

*Cries in SamaSasa again*

Otome (I’m so in it for her):

Dollhouse - Melanie Martinez 

Just. Her backstory. Shit. 

Fling Posse:

- TMD (Talk Me Down) - R & R 

This song just reminds me of the overall relationship between fling posse! I’d make an edit but I’m lazy and sad 

- It’s On Us - AJR

(Honestly AJR is my emotional anchor and it’s obvious)

“It’s not your fault you don’t feel safe it’s not your fault so don’t take blame (no it’s on us)”

“We can try together, make it right together, we can fight together, it’s on us, though your trust is stolen, though your heart is broken, you are never broken, it’s on us” 

“We know what we need to do we’ll be there it’s not on you”

Now da main course:

Samatoki Aohitsugi:

- Karma - AJR : 

THAT PART WHERE ITS LIKE “Where the hell is the karma?” HNGGG

- Can I Get a Witness - Sonreal :

OKAY hear me out:

“I fell in love with you cuz you made me feel, I fell in love with you cuz you kept it real, but you changed up on me, you changed your flow, and now I’ve been hating on you every where I go”

BASICALLY YEAH AND THE REST OF THE SONG TOO

- Honest - Nico Collins 

No comment... 

- Middle Finger - BOHNES 

Oh god I love this song 

“But I refuse to let you make me feel like I can’t fly, not only will I soar again, I’ll own the fucking sky” 

“Livin like a riot, setting off the sirens, fists are clenched I’m fighting, soul has been ignited, ain’t got time for dying, I’m too busy thriving, more than just surviving, heart is beating violent”

And just so much more, this song reminds of his spirit that no matter how many times it’s been broke down just won’t give up, and I love it

- Little Poor Me - Layto 

“I tried hard you know I care, I care, I care, just a little poor me, just a little poor me”

The way he protected what he loved with all his heart, Sasara and Nemu, yet, he still lost them at the end. 

Jyuto Iruma:

The Car - Nightly 

Idk why it fits him—the feel of it I guess 

Ramuda Amemura (maNy but I chose):

- Rabbit Hole - AViVA 

Gives me the feel where he drags people down with him but wants to escape 

- Hypnotized - AViVA

I DONT EVEN GOTTA FUCKIN SAY IT

“Can’t you see you’re hypnotized? Locked inside those eyes. Now don’t you go out at night, you’ll end up hypnotized”

“Look into my eyes find it so appealing look into my eyes send your body reeling, now you’re hypnotized, drag you down down down”

Gentaro Yumeno:

- The Way - Layto

Not so sure about this one—but 

“New Speak, show and tell, this will be my hardest sell, wise men, always say, sadness raps in golden plate” 

Reminds me of how he was bullied and unsocial in school, also how his care takers were elders and made him happy 

- 100 Bad Days - AJR

“A 100 days made a hundred good stories, a 100 good stories make me interesting in parties” 

NSJSBSJJSISS LISTEN IT F I T S

Dice Arisugawa:

- Disaster Party - MAGIC GIANT

FUCKIN-THIS SONG IS SO DICE STFU AND

“You’re a brave heart, but you’re broken, and an Angel, but you’re choking”

THIS REMINDS ME OF HOW DICE SILENTLY ACKNOWLEDGES GENTARO AND RAMUDA BUT DOESNT PUSH INTO THEIR BUSINESS! WHAT A GOOD BOY WE HAVE oh and

“Throw away all your money” hhhhh

- I’m Not Famous - AJR 

Reminds me oh how he could have been literal royalty but decided to say fuck it

Hifumi Izanami:

- Echo - Crusher-P

We don’t talk about why I link this to fumi 

- Oh oh and there’s this part in Parents - Yungblud, “Hi nice to meetcha! Got nothing to believe in! So tell me when my breathing, stops-“ idk it reminds me of his phobia and past 

- Make you Mine - Public The Band

HHHH HES SOFT BBY OKAY 

Doppo Kannonzaka:

- Isolate - SubUrban

“Segregated, situated, hanging on, sophisticated, liberated, nauseated, I just want my medication, individuality and blue lights give me headaches, I’m not changing for the better, I’m just changing clothes on weekends”

Need I say more?

- Come Hang Out - AJR

I personally love this one 

“Come hang out cuz you’re outta your mind, you’re working so damn hard, you forgot what you like, come hang out, don’t you leave us behind. But, I’ll be there next time”

“Come hang out cuz you’re missing your life”

“Should I go for more clicks this year? Or should I follow the click in my ear?”

I feel like this song is from everyone who cares about him which is also me—

Jyushi Aimono/Hitoya Amaguni:

- Crybaby - Melanie Martinez

ABSOLUTELY NOT SHIPPING but the part where it’s like 

“I look at you and I see myself”

Makes me cry because I remember how Hitoya lost his brother to bullying then you have Jyushi so he wants to help the little boy live his life and achieve his goals, unlike his brother, sadly

Sasara Nurude:

- My Play - AJR 

Fucking. Just watch the official vid. That’s all. It’s about parent divorce and slaps.

“When I show you my play, will you pretend you didn’t know, if I make a mistake? It’s gonna get really really really really bad, before it’s okay. But maybe you’ll forget it all, while you’re watching my play” 

- Rose Colored Boy - Paramore 

OHH BOY I WROTE A WHOLE FIC ABOUT THIS ON WATTPAD 

- Istanbul (Not Constantinople) 

FUNNY FUNNY SONG CLOWN LIKE FUNNY FUNNY 

Rei:

- Hushh - AViVA 

Fucker got one. 

“Hush Hush, keep your pretty mouth shut, hush hush, lose your inhibitions”

- This Ain’t A Scene It’s An Arms Race - Fallout boy

Like HeLL.

“Fitting you with Weapons in the form of words, and don’t really care which side wins, as long as the room keeps singing that’s just the business I’m in”

“I’m not a shoulder to cry on, I digress, I’m a leading man, and the lies I weave are so intricate, oh so intricate” 

If you read this then congratulations why the fuck did you waste your time

[theworldsoul]

Uhh warning VENT!!! Talks about self harm and shit... also religious bullshit and gender bullshit??? Like I'm really trans and also Catholicism really fucked me up so if ur uncomfy with that just... skip this post. Also if ur Christian and can't handle seeing ur shit defaced then skip this post. Also if ur gonna clown on this post as "cringe atheism" then fuck you because I'm literally coping with pain lol

:readmore:

Anways now that the disclaimer is over... here comes the real shit.

I... have been going through a LOT lately, jesus christ. I was HAPPY today, yknow? I thought I was gonna be happy the whole day.

I was dancing today. That's how happy I was. For the first time in like... a whole year... I was really so happy. I thought I was gonna cry. But then I got home. And well,,,, I did cry. But not from happiness. I just got my math grade back. A fucking 49 percent. MY AVERAGE RIGHT NOW IS A 57 PERCENT. I MIGHT FAIL MATH 20. I MIGHT HAVE TO RETAKE IT. oh my god I'm such a failure I cant do anything ever i try SO fucking hard but honestly??? I cant fucking do this. I can't, I'm not mentally capable. "Just work harder"... BITCH I AM WORKING AS HARD AS I CAN. I AM SPENDING HOURS AND HOURS OF MY LIFE STUDYING AND PRACTICING. I'm starting to think that how hard i try doesn't even fucking matter because I'm STUPID and all i know how to do is PAINT SHIT!!!! NOBODY CARES ABOUT ART!!!! IF I FAIL THIS CLASS I MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO HAVE A HOUSE IN THE FUTURE!!!! A HOUSE!!!!!

I dont even want to be a fucking orthodontist. Okay??? I wanna do what I love: painting. But NOOOO. I have to get a "respectable" job that will "pay me enough money to live". WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO MAKE MONEY TO LIVE??? WTF??? THATS LITERALLY SO FUCKED UP. everyone deserves to live (unless they like murdered someone? I guess? Idk) BUT LIKE I DIDNT KILL NO ONE SO WHATS ALL THIS BS ABOUT WORKING TO LIVE???? WTF??? I rly gotta do all this shit I hate, all this shit I'm mentally incapable of doing... so i can have a house. Fuck this. Yknow with my average at a 57... I might fail this class even if I get a really good grade on my next quiz. Can you fucking believe it??? I'm literally so fucking stupid I cant even pass a dumb fucking math class god i hate myself. I cant fail this class. I've NEVER failed a class. Almost failed... but never HAD TO RETAKE A CLASS. that's the ultimate failure. I think my parents would hate me if I failed this.

And on top of that... I'm really struggling with uhhh, dysphoria and body image... and it's so fucking horrible man I want to rip all my skin off I want to suffocate god I want to KILL him I want to MAKE HIM SUFFER. I want to gouge his eyes out and force him to eat them. WHY WOULD HE MAKE ME LIKE THIS????? WHY????? WHATS THE POINT IN MAKING A CHILD SUFFER SO MUCH???

What did I ever do that was so wrong I deserved all this punishment???

Well FUCK YOU and fuck your stupid book and FUCK THESE STUPID FUCKING SAINTS. WASNT THERE SUPPOSED TO BE A WHOLEASS ANGEL WATCHING OVER ME?? PROTECTING ME??? WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT BITCH NOW?? WHERE WAS THAT BITCH WHEN... when I was being bullied? When I literally wanted to kill myself?

Where was that guardian angel when I kept making THE SAME MISTAKE over and over again and I KNEW it was wrong but I kept doing it anyways because it was the only way I could feel like soemone cared about me????

I bet that angel motherufcker KNEW they didnt care. DID THE ANGEL EVER ONCE HELP ME??? NOOOO. all those times I was bruised and broken... all those times...

Man, I was just a kid. I was SO fucking young. And I would come like a lamb to the slaughter and kneel. I would pray... ask for guidance. I would pray the rosary too, I would read the bible and try my very best to understand it, I would go to church and volunteer at church and do my best to be a Good Boy and never sin. I did EVERYTHING right. I literally fasted at some point, like a religious fast. I was devoted...

Honestly though? I think it was the same mistake I make over and over again, except not with a real person.

And you have me NOTHING. GO GIRL, GIVE US NOTHING!!!!!!! I literally used to self-punish for the sins I couldnt bring myself to confess. At my communion, there was one sin I didn't tell because I knew it was unforgivable. I still hate myself for that. But man, I used to try and do all sorts of things to somehow cleanse myself of it. I figured THAT whole ordeal was why I was constantly being tortured.

But I was stupid and I am stupid and that makes NO SENSE because if the thing I'm being punished for happened when I was a child, WHY DID THE PUNISHMENT BEGIN AT MY BIRTH????

They used to tell me that god handcrafted every part of me specifically for some sort of grand reason.

Why.

Really? This bitch really "handcrafted" me just so I could cry and cut myself nearly every night??? Fuck that. Like why would you make me this way. It hurts more than you can IMAGINE. The only reason I'm not dead yet is because of ME, MY strength, not any of the bullshit YOU gave me. I hate when people say "oh, god made u so hardworking" or "oh, god made you so passionate/hopeful/full of love/fiery/whatever" LIKE STFU BITCH THAT WAS NOT SKYDADDY THAT WAS ME!!!

you wanna know what he made me?

dysphoric, ugly af, yeah.... but the worst part?

He made me feel.

That doesn't sound bad, right? Well it's the worst thing on the list. It is my downfall, my Achilles heel or whatever. This emotions shit??? It RUINED my life. My whole life I was cursed with a fucking monster inside me. I kept trying to tell everyone that it wasnt me!!! I kept telling them that it felt like I was being possessed. But adults are SHIT. I hate adults. I want to kill them all. They failed me and their god failed me. None of them every listened to me. All they knew how to do was punish, punish, punish.

It's like giving an allergic kid some peanuts and then getting angry at them for going into anaphylactic shock or whatever. Nobody ever thought "hey, why don't we stop giving the kid peanuts?"

ALL THE ADULTS AROUND ME ACT LIKE CHILDREN AND THEY ALWAYS HAVE ACTED LIKE CHILDREN FUCK ADULTS

Anwyays that's how I ended up with all these unresolved issues,.... emotion is a tough one, like I literally dont have the ability to control my emotions at all, I can try and like, repress them but I cant make myself actually feel less.

My emotion hurts more than anyone else's and nobody ever understood that. I would tell them that it hurts, it PHYSICALLY HURTS, and they would say I just wanted attention. I would tell them I literally couldnt control what my body said and did, I would tell them I felt like A PUPPET ON STRINGS and no one believed me. Fuck them.

Healthy coping mechanisms? I literally self ship with Snape to cope. I literally self ship with characters my brain made up and put in my dreams to cope. I used to hurt myself so much trying to feel loved and cared about irl. Fiction is so much better. I sound like a loser but its TRUE. The sort of thing I need, the sort of love I need is like... a parent. You can't go looking for a parent in a romantic partner, it fucks everything up and you end up... well, let's just say it proabbly wasnt the most legal thing, but I wasnt thinking strisght at all I mean dude I was So fucked in my head when I did all that...whatever...anyways so thank u for fiction!!! I love fiction. Want to kill someone? Draw it. Then you'll feel much better!!! And you dont go to jail!!!

Well the pics here... idk, it was really calming to do this. It's new, painting over religious shit. I was gonna do the whole bible but I already burnt that shit so.... and I was going to cut but I'm trying really hard to stay clean... like really hard. It's so weird and like, addicting, once I hit styro I don't want to stop, but also it kinda transfers the emotional pain to physical pain, making it way easier to deal with. I just can't keep doing that because I KNOW it's bad and look I thoguht I was clean for a whole year but then I fucked up and WOW, GUESS WHAT MADE ME RELAPSE??? MATH CLASS!!!!

Whatever anyways here are my wonderful works of art I made while crying and cursing god (like I'm so pissed at all this catholic bs I believed in him again just to swear at him lol)

.... but imagine for a moment, a better world. One in whcih these saints whose images I've defaced are actually good people... a world in which they SEE ME AND THEY HEAR ME... and I go unpunished.... and I am embraced by someone who UNDERSTANDS.

I think I would cry.

Too bad that world doesnt exist and I just made it up to try and feel a bit better. Whatever, whatever. I painted the things, they're gonna dry. I work hard, I'm gonna do good on my quiz, I hope. I just have to be making it through, that's all it is, work work work without a break but I can proabbly do it. I'm really slipping I admit like the mental health is slipping it's getting worse like I havent had a "fuck I am afab" moment in such a long time so yeah...

Anwyays I feel so much better now that I did my little art project yknow???

[maddiefriendlovesbilly]

Spencer x Ghost?

Spencer x Ghost

(AAAAA- it has been months since you sent this to me, and all i can say is im so sorry) Side note I have my friend @lethalbreadkills helping me with this one!

For reference: Maddie (maddiefriendlovesbilly) is green, Jimmy (lethalbreadkills) is red (((its 4:30 at the time i have joined this so im dead braincell wise sorry yall))) and Orange is stuff we decided together :3

Also this is so very chaotic im so sorry for this anon but this has been in my fuckin drafts for SO LONG and this is the only way its getting finished (its now 5 am uwu) im so sorry for all the shitposting i do its a mess. I shouldnt have been allowed here. (we finished at about 5:30 am its hell <3)

Sphost? Ghencer?? Sphoster??? I adore and despise them all equally.

We have decided that it should be BeanieGhost

Anyway I think this ship is really cute

They’re both so neurotic I can only imagine the chaos that would ensue

One of them starts a rant on some topic and the other joins the hell in

I’m an advocate of LETTING SPENCER INFO DUMP BECAUSE HE DESERVES IT OKAY

And Ghost would let this dream come true???

I would die for both of them and if Spencer told me I had to die I wouldn’t even complain, no questions I’d just be like “Aight.” I trust him that much.

(Not sure I trust Ghost’s judgment enough to do that unquestioningly; sorry Ghost)

Back on topic

I can’t imagine these guys on anything that comes close to society’s definition of a date

It’d be more like “hey you wanna come on this hunt with us?” “maybe, depends if there’ll be snacks” or like chilling in Spence’s room binging the entire star trek: original series in one sitting or “oops sorry about that level 11 entity that attached to my soul and is now wreaking havoc in your house, wanna make out later to make up for it?” “Fine but you also have to play three rounds of Call of Duty with me afterward”

They wouldn’t be romantic often but like highkey? I can see them throwing themselves into the line of fire for each other with a recklessness only they could survive

We can’t forget that Spencer is a more than 60,000-year-old overpowered demon/god/entity/thing, which, yes, could throw a slight wrench in this ship for multiple reasons, but I choose to make angst out of it instead.

Side note: Ghost is a chronic conspiracy theorist (and you can’t tell me otherwise) and every once in awhile Spencer will offhandedly say something like “Y’know I helped the Egyptians build the pyramids” and Ghost just goes fucking feral.

Look, I’m not saying Spencer IS touch-starved and most likely has issues creating and developing relationships and therefore avoids interpersonal connection, especially offline, but I AM saying he is prime material for it. (thats a lie thats exactly what shes saying don’t believe it) (I’m projecting okay dont judge me) (loser imagine projecting)

Imagine with me for a second: Why does Spencer willingly stay with a family who locks him in their basement with only minor complaining? He’s a near all-powerful entity just released into the world for Spence’s-sake - If he wanted to, there’s no telling what havoc he could wreak! So why doesn’t he? Why would someone so powerful, so terrifying, so dangerous that a group of people decided to seal him away forever stay with the first family he finds in sub-par conditions for years - especially someone who’s seen to be as high-maintenance as Spencer? Let me hit you with a theory: He’s chasing the feelings of validation, safety, and love - no matter how rarely it’s shown - that a family can provide. Being socially isolated for even a few years can do a number to a person’s psyche (I should know, I’m projecting onto this character right now), let alone thousands.

Now maybe Ghost can’t match thousands of years in isolation, but damn if he doesn’t have a few years of crippling loneliness on his record too.

I can see the two of them learning how to be vulnerable around others together, emotionally and physically; learning how to open up and how to talk through issues; and some third point, because points are better in threes.

(May I suggest that these losers are both trans but thats just me adding in my own projection lmao)

(You absolutely may)

Imagine the conversation thats just “so i have a murderer in my head thats an ass” “rip to u ig sounds like a you problem :///”

imo spence has trouble expressing emotions other than like,,, annoyance and haughtiness, its like sort of his go-to defence, so showing Ghost his emotions is a big step for him

I hear you, and i say yes good. (found this one headcanon that i kinda live by where he was uh, either autistic or adhd i dont remember but theres that too) OH yeah that would be at thing huh. Spencer: *is emotionally vulnerable @ ghost* ghost: oh shit im trusted??? Oh fuck uh.

Yeah so like…. Ghost and spence showing emotion at eachother is kind of :flushed: ghost be like: whats an emotion. Imagine having emotions fuciiing loser hhaha,,,, *laughs nervously*

Ghost is also very emotionally distant with most people so it would probably be like “what??? The fuck?? Emotions?????? You have those???”

Ghost and Spencer be like *gay*

So another idea is that maybe Spencer realizes Ghost doesnt play any games [like the uncultured SWINE he is] and decides he must [remedy] this and so he introduces him to like, nintendo first. (some bitches thought that said nintendo fortnite. Im bitches) and theyre playing like, mario kart or smash or smth and Ghost gets really [fuckin into it]

Ghost and spencer: *literally in eachothers laps playing fucking wii tennis*

Spooker: what are the- *TOAST FUCKING SLAPS A HAND ACROSS HIS MOUTH* shut up you dont wanna know what happens when its mentsonssbfdjfsd (sorry i had a stroke uwuwuwuw)

(Theyre in denial we don’t judge in this house)

They will not hesitate to play dirty either, they will straight up push each other over and vaguely flirt

Ghost is losing and straight up fucking goes “ur hot” and spencer actually dies and boom ghost is the winner. sparkle emoji Magic sparkle emoji

“I am Not a HomoSexual:™:” “Yeah, sure you aren’t” “Screw off”

Pet-names-ish: Asshole, Gaymer-Boy, casual insults, Mr. Spirit Bitch, Mistake, Loves Ghosts More Than His Boyfriend What A Fucking Loser aka Gay-ass

Pros:

They both open up a lot most likely. Gain someone to trust since they’ve sort of been through the same things (though on much different scales)

I can see soft hours of hanging in each other’s bedrooms

Spencer is a tsundere you cant tell me otherwise youre just a coward if you disagree

So is Ghost so this can only go well

Every time Ghost has to solve a case at the Acachallas Spence is just peaking out from his basement like “the fuck is this?? Hot Man??????”

Enemies to lovers 500k (Gets Hot and Steamy :flushed: NOT CLICKBAIT!!!!11!!!!! 18+!!!!!!! GAY LOVE StORY!!!!!!) Lemonz!!! Made from teh Sexiest of Wattpaders UWUWUWU YAOI Boys Love don’t like don’t read!! (this is so fucking stupid jkfnd) I hate this with a passion Q^Q. All my years of being a basic watpad fanboy have helped me to the moment i bring maddie to tears

The steam is just like,,,,, holding hands and being angy all the fuckin time the steam is literal because their anger translates into actual steam

Cons:

Their angst has nowhere to go and it just sits between them like two raccoons at a dumpster-style mexican standoff

They really start off hating each other huh. Like, I know this can still lead to healthy relationships but neither of them are very good at healthy relationships with people he hasn’t known for his Whole Life so that’s an Oh No.

They totally feed off of each other’s stupidity (but this could be seen as a pro too so take that as you will) as well as anger - im talking one-upping each other kinda shit

Its ridiculous honestly how intense it gets, like they straight up need intervention sometimes because they dont realize they can just STOP

Conclusions:

I think this would be a relationship that would that a lot of time and hard work to make work, but i think in the end it would be really super cute!! Like it would make no fuckin sense to anyone else but somehow they’d understand each other and help each other through their similar issues. Also theyre both big nerds in different ways and i think they’d have just ranting sessions back and forth over and over and it would be soft!!!!! So yeah, i think it would work, at least, i want it to :D

So. Maybe?? I feel like it could, but they’d need to work pretty hard to make it healthy and not constant fighting. Could be stupid amounts of cute and wholesome but also could be stupid amounts of oh no and pain, depending on how the two act. If they learned how to get along with each other and work past their differences it could be super cute and soft. Just a very, er, bumpy beginning. And middle. And end. (this makes me very nervous,,,,why did you mention an end) (wouldnt you like to know weather boy) (TvT) UFDUNS bumpy but soft . Agreeing with the loser gay, want this to work it’d be interesting :3

[sablesides-writing-corner]

For The First Sentence Starters List, Can You Do “You Dropped This.” But With Thomas X Roman?

Roman was a hopeless romantic, no one was going to deny him that. He'd worked at coffee shops, flower boutiques, all manner of fanfiction starters, yet nothing had come from it. He kept looking, waiting, begging for something to happen. At this point, after countless dates gone wrong and cheats and betrayals, he was starting to give up. His brother had already earned his happy ending, Roman had been the best man at their wedding. He was happy for Remus, of course, but it only served to make him feel even more inadequate.

"I dont know Logan, maybe theres just something wrong with me?" Roman said, poking the food in front of him with a sigh.

"Roman, we've been over this at least a dozen times, you're not unlovable, you just have to find someone that fits you, maybe let the feelings develop instead of assuming fanfiction tropes will help you," Logan said, thumbing through another page in his physics book.

"I guess you're right. . . well I'll see you later then I guess, dont spend to much time in the book of yours, you know Patton doesnt like it when you burn yourself out," Roman said, getting up from the table. Logan nodded and put the book back in his bag, opting to open up a laptop instead.

Roman hadnt gotten very far before he knocked into someone. The man was about his height, with both brown hair and eyes, and a classic steven universe t-shirt.

"Nice shirt, I love that show!" Roman exclaimed.

"Thanks, I'm Thomas," said the man, holding his hand out.

Roman shook it gladly, "Roman, Roman Prince," he said, flashing a grin.

They talked about the show for what seemed like hours, before Roman checked the time and decided it was time to leave. They exchanged numbers and went their separate ways.

Early the next day Roman awoke to a text message. He opened his phone to Thomas' number and an image.

Thomas S: I think you dropped this

Roman squinted at the image until he could make out the vague shape of a plush lion, the fabric was torn at odd ends, and there was a crudely drawn green mustache on its face.

Roman P: Oh gods, that is mine, thank you for finding it, it's a gift from my brother from when we were kids- don't know what I'd do if I'd lost it.

Thomas S: wanna meet up at my place to get it back?

Roman P: sure, I just need directions

The drive didnt take to long, turns out Thomas only lived a few blocks down. Roman checked his hair in the window reflection and knocked on the door.

"Welcome! I hope it's not to much of a mess," Thomas said after flinging open the door. Roman walked inside, immeadietly captivated by the plethora of cartoon merchandise and books that lined the shelves.

"Here's your lion back, why dont you sit down and I'll make you something to eat?" Thomas said, placing the stuffed toy in Roman's arms. Roman sat on the couch and watched Thomas as he worked. Now that they werent in public he wasmt as afraid to stare for to long. He could notice the way Thomas' mouth always seemed to be curled in the smallest of smiles, how carefully he would examine each detail of what he did for any sign of an error, the way his eyes sparkled when caught in the right light.

Roman snapped back to attention, he wasnt going to do this again, not after last time, he couldnt fall in love so quickly anymore.

"Is something wrong Roman?" Thomas said, beckoning him over to a table.

Roman shook his head and sat down, the bitter words escaped his mouth with all to much ease "I'm fine, thank you" and he began to eat. He and Thomas talked for hours once again, and barely noticed when the sun disappeared over the horizon.

"I guess you've gotta get home now, huh?" Thomas said, watching the sky with intrigue.

Roman pondered this for a moment "Not. . . necessarily. . . I could stay a little longer," he said.

"Really?" there was that spark in his eyes again, Roman could get used to that face.

"Yeah, not like I have anything else to do, no shift tomorrow," Roman grinned.

It was amazing, really, what a chance meeting could earn a person. It'd been months, maybe even a year at this point, but it seemed like just yesterday the two of them met in that store, and that lion had earned Roman what felt like his first real relationship. He finally found someone to talk for hours about disney with, to sing songs at 3am without yelling. Thoams was his everything, the match he finally needed to go from rogue knight to crown prince.

Now, looking at the photos of Remus and his husband Virgil brought less pain, he could talk to Thomas about all the dumb stuff they'd done when they were kids. Thomas could laugh and kiss him on the cheek and talk for hours about all the mistake's he'd made when learning new things like cooking, or about all the productions he'd been in. Roman loved hearing about those, loved watching Thomas' face light up as he talked about one play then the next, and listening to him sing the show tunes at the top of his lungs.

Roman finally had the thing he'd been waiting his whole life to find, he finally had someone who loved him not for looks or skills, but for just who he was.

[angeliclunaetic]

just thinking back to the day i met him, till now and,, there was always something about him. something that drew me in and everything just felt right. That day we met,, something about him just drew me in. idk if it was his sense of humor or just how polite n sweet and caring he was in general but it was,, something. idek why i even texted him in the first place. i just commented on his stuff and decided to text him. we talked for a few and then he showed me a pic of himself and i was just,, in awe. he really was the cutest thing ever. yes i had thought abt using him when i first saw him but,, i couldnt even if i had wanted to. i seen his pic and thought “yeah he looks like he’d be easy to use” but then by the end of texting him that night,, i fell so deeply for him. actually no. i already fell for him. way before we even met. that must be how everything felt so right. but just texting him a little bit that first night,, i just instantly wanted to know more about him. i never even talked abt someone else to my gc and for some reason i had the urge to talk about him,, like i knew he was the one but didn’t realize it. and then when we called for the first time,, i swear i had butterflies. even though i was otp with him and his friend,, i was so nervous to just talk to him. i had thought of him as my crush at that point. no one had ever made me feel that way. i never got so nervous to talk to anyone. i wanted to stay quiet that entire time so i wouldnt say something stupid and embarrass myself but something about him,, made me want to be so open. so i talked to him,, and when we got off the phone of our first call,, i was so incredibly sad. i wanted to talk to him more and more and i just wanted to call him again already,, but i wasnt sure how he had felt or if he even felt the same. i thought he did but i didnt wanna assume and make a fool out of myself. i wasnt sure if he had a crush or if he was just being nice. but after a while it was easy to realize. he was way too sweet and caring to me. more than a friend should be. he was there for me the night i was bawling otp w my ex. and he got mad and upset about how my ex was treating me in a way that was different than just my friends. and thats what made me fall for him even more. just him. being himself. him being so sweet. so caring. him just being there for me and not judging me and wanting others to treat me right. and when we videocalled that first time,,i was so nervous. i was worried he’d see what i look like and not be attracted to me anymore. but he still was. but i was so nervous anyways. but when i saw him on video call for the first time,, i was in shock. how could someone be so cute. so perfect. how could someone capture my heart just by simply smiling at me. i knew from then, that i, was in love with him. i wanted to be his so badly. but when he had asked me out i wanted to just scream yes at him,, but something in my mind told me to just calm down and wait,, however a part of me was worried that if i had made him wait that he’d find someone better and leave me. but he didn’t he stayed. even after that night i had told him everything. of how i used to use people and how i had originally planned to use him and he still stayed. i swear i felt my heart break that night and i was crying so much out of fear that he’d leave me before we even got together. i had such strong feelings for him and i wanted him to be mine. but i wanted to make sure i was away from,, that thing,, and that i fully loved him before i got into anything serious. i didnt wanna jump from relationship to relationship either. a part of me just wanted to be single and just have fun. but just,, talking to him and texting him,, i wanted him. i didnt care if i wasnt single. i just wanted him. but also a part of me didnt want to love again. or “love” as i should say considering i never loved anyone before him. i was mentally and emotionally exhausted and relationships are just so much work and you have to give someone such a large piece of yourself and i wouldnt be able to handle being broken again. so many thoughts ran through my head. “what if i dont love him, what if im just attracted to him because im going through things and he’s there for me” “what if he wont wait for me” “what if he doesnt like me “ “what if im using him and dont realize” “what if i get hurt” all these “what if’s” and i never once thought abt the reality of it all. that i, had feelings for him. that he felt the same. that he was willing to wait for me, even if it took years. that he would never hurt me and even allowed himself to be hurt by me if that meant even just getting a chance at me loving him. i guess i was just so worried and just in shock. no ones felt so deeply for me before.and that night that i had asked him out,,, i had seen a pic of my ex with this new girl and i felt absolutely nothing towards it. so then,, thats when i knew. i was over him. that emotional attachment was gone. and my feelings for sam were real. and we had called that night,, that entire night i was so nervous and got butterflies, and i realized i never stopped smiling once during that whole phone call. and after we got of,, i, once again, was extremely sad. i wanted to hear his voice talking to me for hours and hours. i wanted to smile and feel nervous and get butterflies. and at that point i was like,, fuck it. yes i was still worried that my feelings werent true. but what was the harm in trying. he was the only person to have caught my eye in like,, ever. he was on my mind that whole night and probably abt like 30 mins after we got off call i asked him out. my feelings for him were too strong. i was worried he wouldnt wait and i couldnt risk losing someone as special as him to someone else,, if i did, i wouldve never forgiven myself. im glad i asked him out. even though i had surprised myself by it,, i just couldnt wait any longer,, i needed to make him mine. and i did. and i wouldnt change it for the world. the first month for me was very,, rough. of course we were still getting to know each other and our boundaries,, and i of course made some mistakes. my fears of possibly not having true feelings were coming back. and it pushed him away because he didnt wanna get hurt. and he almost left me. those two nights that we had an issue and he had left me,, they broke me. they really did. that  was the worst i had ever been. the crying,, the screaming,, the anger and complete sadness i felt. i felt as if i had lost everything. i felt as if i had nothing left. if i didnt have him,, then,, who am i. im nothing without him. he’s my other half. my soulmate. and i thought i had lost him. im glad im so annoying and clingy otherwise i’d be so fucking heartbroken without him. we had only been together for less than a month those two times and yet i felt so strongly for him. nothing has ever made me feel this way. i had never wanted to keep someone in my life so bad before. it was like,, i needed him to breathe. i needed him to smile. i just,, needed him. i cant live without him. just thinking about a life without him makes me fucking sick. i want him and only him for the rest of our lives. no one can even compare to him. im just,, in shock. like im really in love with him and it just amazes me. im sitting here writing this as he’s sound asleep and i just. i miss him a lot. i guess all my feelings are coming out now since ive been distant the past month but,, i dont care. ill gladly shout from the rooftops how much i love him. god there’s so much more i could say about us. even before we started dating. i cant get over the rush i felt. the excitement, the nerves, the butterflies,, even all the “what if’s”,, i still get nervous and get butterflies when talking to him but ofc they’re not gonna be as strong as when we had met and declared our love for each other. speaking of love,, now im reminded of the day i had told him that i love him,, we had “argued” the day before and i thought i had lost him for good,, and that next day,,i wanted nothing more than to just hold him and kiss him and tell him that i love him. i know the words “i love you” is such a meaningful thing,, i couldnt help but tell him. its exactly how i felt. i loved him. i couldnt be apart from him,, even after only a week of dating him,, i was in love that night i thought he was leaving me for good,, absolutely broke me. and the next day i just wanted to hold him tight and never let him go. even though i was so nervous to tell him that i loved him,, i just,, i knew i was sure. no one had ever made me feel so strongly about them. yeah ive cried over my ex. but nothing could ever compare to just the complete distraught i felt that night. that crying so much it burned my throat and threw up,, the screaming,, just the complete sadness and anger i felt. after that,, i knew i loved him, and i wasnt afraid to tell him. i was nervous bc of how he’d react but i knew that i was never more sure of anything else in my life. i love him. and i want to be with him forever. 

[birdyverdie]

Positive vibes only bitches

seeing a lot of character hate in my dash and?? ew disgusting. so how about a post about why i love all the Marvel characters ey?

Tony: Pure bean nerd, so tired and so curious about the world around? remember that starry eyed look he had in im2 with the new element?? damn. Also do you not see him caring for inanimate objects like Dummy and U? like wow me too. he is so sentimental and cares so much but is emotionally constipated and can’t show it :/ Also just wants the world to be safe and sure, he makes mistakes but Tony Stark never makes the same mistake twice.

Steve: lawless righteous man. Loyal?? to like a fault but that doesnt remove how freaking powerful he is. he tries to do whats best for the team and it shows and he is really careful about everything. also that little weasle tried to illegally enlist his 90+ lbs asthma self to the army? wow. Steve Rogers is literally teaching us to follow ur dreams and one day you will achieve it. also? art goals.

Natasha: black widow queen baby! .like she’s so wary bcuz of red room and it probably still haunts her and she really wants to be a better person. Red ledger? she’s trying to grab a sponge and a hell of a lot of bleach to clean it out. Knows she made mistakes and is actively trying to fix it and is so strong by doing so <3 plus she will steal ur clothes if she likes you and will beat anyone up and it really shows

 Bruce: what a shy lil scientist boy. surprisingly witty and funny? like wow have you seen AoU and Ragnarok? a powerful man regardless of his green. insecurity that reeks across the room but can become so confident so quickly. 7 phds??? damn can you help me with my physics homework pleasE? also is teaching us?? that all things will get better soon and you can do it. Go past all your fears and insecurity because theres a strength inside of you that can be released so easily <3

Clint: what a hecking trickster, probably the super milder version of Loki because he has those™ vibes. honestly just tired and wants to go hope to his family and his dog named lucky. he’s?? so underrated?? and is funny and i really like this character and i hope we get to see more of him/ronin in Endgame <3

Thor: So sweet, like terrifying when he wants to be but such a bright and innocent soul. Definitely the light of the party. Im not gonna lie im really happy they took out his Shakespearean schtick and made him much more relatable and smart. like? “All words are made up” finally!! we can see him for who he really is!! 1500+ year old wise god with powerful skills but empathy. character arc!! used to be a screaming baby with goals of genocide but finally learned the true ways!! and damn if Marvel isn’t all about change. He sees a mess? and he goes and fixes it to the best of his ability

Bucky: haha 1942 science nerd. Legit went to a science expo because he likes it!! he’s also so loyal and confused and is really just tired of war and is filled with regret. He wants to be better and not be a tool. because no more! no more! he got brainwashed first so now he’s going to take control of his life and become the best person he can be!!

Sam: wow?? look at how strong this guy is. his partner died and instead of wallowing and turning to rage he just? decided to help people with PTSD? like thats some major strength right there. he literally is the type of “something bad happens to you? dont let it get you down and help others out” like wow so hecking powerful. quippy sarcastic but well-natured and i strive to be like him!! really underrated!!

T’Challa: Wakan’t do this forever but he tries. he?? took the mantle of King right after his father’s death because he knows he can’t fail everyone else. They need a ruler. And he provides that . freaking best older brother you can ask for, like?? he knows jack shit about Shuri’s references but tries to go with the flow.

Stephen: snark™ king 2.0. do no harm but take no shit. thats literally his character and i love it. really wants to try to find the most peaceful resolution to everything even though he is a major badass and can kill so many enemies so easily. character growth!! like damn he really taught us that it’s not about us. its about the others and it really shows. like wow wheres the love for this guys?

Vision: oh man everyone loves Jarvis and he?? is part of Vision and you can see the Jarvis reeking out. He’s so witty and powerful and damn. Absolute walking computer, you can ask him to play whatever song and he’ll somehow be able to do it. strikes me as a pinocchio kinda guy. i mean a sentient robot in a human world? must be kinda hard to fit in. 

Wanda: powerful goddess like damn have you even seen her?? she’s so angry with the world and with loss but is quick to change her views. she changes and thats all that matters. because people don’t stay the same way. She teaches us that it’s possible to change even though it goes against all of your beliefs. Everything that you stand for. she aims to fix her mistakes and learns from them.

Peter: PUREST BEAN. like so stressed with school, but so responsible. Well....unless you disregard all his missing backpacks. he honestly has one goal and that is to help the people. he’s literally the representation of everything we want for a leader. So capable and he knows it and just tries to reach his potential the fastest and quickest he can. plus vine refrences?? says “more expresso less depresso” despite probably disliking coffee. like damn no wonder why everyone just wants to adopt this kid. 

Rhodey: Will take none of your bullshit, he sees you with negative thoughts or whatever? will tell you that ur so hecking wrong and you better think better of yourself. so positive but so realistic. tries to do what is best and doesn’t let any silly thing like a disability bring him down. He out there ready to kick some ass and he will do it with style, man. nothing can bring him down.

Scott: World’s greatest grandma. have you seen how nice and parental he is with his daughter? like get me a dad like Scott please i beg. His whole characters surrounds around trying to be the best dad he can be to Cassie. He’s also  funny and witty and a goof but a planner. sees something that can help? will absolutely take it regardless if he knows what the hell is going on or not. he knows that people are smarter than him and won’t take offense because heck yeah you go support!! moral support!!

No hate please!! i will block anyone with any hate comments!! i dont wanna hear it!!! i love all the characters so take your hate somewhere else!!!

[flamebrain]

mattfoggy hcs, straight from the bastard empire sorry these all read like shitepostes(L O N G post under cut you’ve been warned)

WTNV au:

nightvale is just populated by like. vigilantes and other poewered people and foggy shoes up one day like. hey anyone need a lawyer? and the whole town falls in love w him

MURDERDOCK IS KEVIN

matt does radio and talks about foggys perfect hair and perfect teeth and foggy calls in like "heh, thanks dude, but aren't you like blind?" and matt shuts the call off immediatley

everybody knows matt is daredevil because he makes wink wink nudge nudge comments about it like 'ah. it appears that an entity has appeared near the dog park. castle appears to be on the scene now, and...ok, he's got a gun. i cant do anything about that, but my pal (noises of him scrambling and obviously knocking things over) daredevil might be able OKHERESTHEWEATHER" and it cuts off and like. he shows up 5 seconds later to kick frank in the face for using lethal measures AGAIN

EVERY TIME IT CUTS TO THE WEATHER AND THEN CUS BACK AND THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN SOLVED ITS JUST MATT. like. breathing just a little heavier than normal into the mic like. 'so it appears uh. the issue has been resolved thanks again to daredevil and his pal moon knight. such a shame i had to cower under my desk while the weather was on. ok goodnight'

the funky thing abt nightvale in this au is that it's basically just like. new york from 616 but foggy's like. from our earth so he's like HWAT THE FUCK AND AHIT IS GOING ON IN HERE ON THIS DAY AND WHY CANT I LEAVE he gets kidnapped by super villains on like his second day in town and immediatley regrets every life choice he's ever made

matt works at nightvale radio by day and conviently cuts to the weather every time something comes up so sometimes there's like. 7 half hour weather broadcasts a day and the townspeople just. humor him

foggy falls in love with matt after figuring out after .5 seconds that he's daredevil and he saved him from a bunch of baddies on like his second day and matt compliments him on the radio like every day and yeah they're fuckin good ok assorted stupid college hcs: matt and foggy like to chill in each other's beds. foggy doesn't notice that often because matt moves back b4 he gets back and matt pretends not to notice but  like. he can smell foggy was there. foggy. stop napping in this bed you're making my sheets smell like you, foggy, i KNOW they're silk and i know you think you're getting away with it but you're NOT,

matt, coming back into the dorm after being out for the day: foggy are you laying on my bed foggy, sitting up straight: nah pal. just sitting on the end for a minute hehe. just had to rest the old joints matt, knowing DAMN well that he was lying down a second ago and he's obviously lying but not being able to say anything; haha ok. move

hrnnn matt knows foggy is gay long before he tells him because he catches him in a lie about who he was out with but he can't say anything and like. he knows foggy is scared to tell him but he doesn't know how to bring it up and he's like. i want him to know he can trust me but i don't know how to tell him i know please foggy

foggys heart goes a mile a minute anytime the subject of being gay comes up around matt and matt wants to yell at him that it's OK and he doesn't care but his hints that he's fine with it seem to fly right over foggys head and so one day he gets so fed up with trying to convince foggy he's chill with gay people he just kisses him. wig

hrnnn. matt doesn't like the snow because it messes with his senses and he can't see but he can't say that to foggy so he just says he doesn't like the cold and foggys like "yeah doofus you weigh like three pounds you're skin and bone compared to me smh" and insists on cuddling him every time he sees matt get like That bc he thinks he's just chilly and it's. oddly comforting to matt because yeah. nobody really Holds him like that, and he Is Cold, and foggy is Warm,

matt gets Very touchey around people he's close with and so when he gets close with foggy he puts his arm around him a lot, rests his head on his shoulder, holds his arm even when they're not going anywhere, etc. foggys heart speeds up every time but matt just assumes that's what people hearts do when that happens because he doesn't really do that with anyone else and hey, he's happy when he does it and his heart maybe spikes a little too, but then he gets someone else's arm to lead him when foggys sick one week and their heart stays the exact same, what's up with that? so then he starts paying attention to all the people on campus, and the touching doesn't usually make the hearts go wild, but, well. matt 'sees' it happens and he's like HaHa, See, This is A Thing, and then he realizes that the people that have it happen to them? they're couples. and he just. freezes because first of all, Foggy- and at him- an- and second, his heart ALSO does a thing, so-

heres a rEALLY stupid unrelated au/hc i got after hearing a friends disater story hfdjhskja matt goes on a blind (hehe) date with a girl and it's pretty much a disaster, it turns out she brought her friend who is also meeting a guy at the same place, and like. she's obviously incredibly wack she says blind people are god's mistake and stupid shit like that so matt gets up halfway through their meal to go sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes while he thinks of an excuse to leave? and eventually a guy comes in and he's like 'uh hey, dude, you in here? your date grabbed her friend and left so we're both dateless now, thats a relief for me and unless you're just having incredibly bad bowel movements i think it's pobably one for you since you Have been in here for like half an hour uh im foggy by the way' and then they go back out and sit together and talk about how wack that fuckin was and like. inadvertent date

hey i can talk a lot of shit about how matt falls asleep on foggy but. sometimes foggy falls asleep on or next to or with matt and matt goes !!!! and he does not move and then he eventually falls asleep with foggy head on his shoulder and his head on foggys and when FOGGY wakes up and realizes matts still there and is ALSO asleep he doesn't move and eventually falls back asleep and then it's just like. waiting until the time aligns that they're both awake at the same time because neither wants to move and wake the other send tweet

SOULMATE AU:

foggy looks up from his college bed, sees matt, and suddenly EVERYTHING is fucking rainbow and he's like 'oh fuck. oh shit. wait. this is a dude' and matt's like 'is everything ok my guy?' because foggy's like. >:O and of course he has no idea because he's blind but foggy doesnt realise this and for a hot minute he;s like "OH FUCK. ITS ONE OF THOSE RARE OCASIONS WHERE HES PERFECT FOR ME BUT I'M NOT FOR HIM," and is about to s o b before he's like wait a fucking minute

yknow the au where like. the first words you hear from your soulmate are marked on your skin at birth? foggy's are 'excuse me', absolutley common, a chance meeting, and he stops jumping every single time he hears them after age 8 when he realises just how many times that phrase is said. matt's are 'yeah, who're you looking for,'  but he doesnt remember that, there's no constant reminder of it since he's blind, the nuns wouldn't tell him, the kids made up childish shit like 'poopoo', and stick DEFINITLEY wouldnt fucking tell him because hes stick and hes an asshead and eventually matt stops asking and caring. it takes WEEKS for after they meet for foggy to ask matt about his words and matt just says 'oh yeah, i dont remember. here" and shows foggy and when he sees them he's like. 'hm. sounds familiar' and forgets about it untill like two years later theyre drunk and talking about the first time they met and matt's like 'yeah you asked like 'who'm i looking for and then panicked because i was blind' and foggy's brain just like. short circuits for a whole ass minute and then when it clicks he just goes. "yOU"

TRANS MATT:

matt realises when he's still in the orphanage that mayhaps he hates being not a dude and haha! hes not gonna fucking come out to catholics he knows about That. he tries to tell stick, around the time their closest, and FUCK STICK he refuses to call him anything else or support him becaise stick is a peace of fuck shit FUCK STICK so that scars matt from coming out for a DAMN while so like. when he goes to college he introduces himself to everyone as matt and emails his proffesors like. 'hello please my name is redacted on your forms please call me matt its uh. a nickname' and he's not like. out to anyone but matt is close enought to his deadname that most people don't question it. foggy does, though, a little while after they meet, and matt is so fed up with not telling people and being called the wrong pronouns he just goes 'i want to be a guy ok' and goes absolutley APESHIT when foggy's like 'oh, cool. do you want me to use he pronouns for you' because wait. people are...ok sometimes? and matt's like. about to cry 

 alternatley: matt says "I don't wanna be a girl." and foggy goes "oh hey are you trans? same hat!" and then foggy tells matt like. binding tips and shit and theyre Good ok

deadpool kills transphobes, sm n dd just fucking beat the SHIT out of them in a back alley and like. they let DP know where they are but whatever happens happens :D

elektra, impaling two transphobes onto the side of a building with her knives: matthew, i know you can hear me, why

one day elektra sees matt has dumped a guy on her roof and just. sighs and goes back inside and matt waits for like 15 minutes before halfheartedly picking up the dude and dropping him off at franks.

matt dropped them off at nats One Time and she went apeshit and hunted down like 20 more of them.

foggy, holding a bat: cmon matt let me kill ONE matt: 'fine but if you get caught im not going to be your lawyer.'

INTO THE DEVILVERSE AU:

earth 14512/TRN700 (peni parker’s universe) matt murdock has a robot seeing eye dog who's also a vigilante

hddjdsjdhdn they all show up to earth 6's foggy and he just. sighs and all the devils start crying because He Is Here

hmm ok. canonically we know nothing about miles's matt but we know he exists and is known figure because miles knows of him but doesn't know he's daredevil i'm Prefty Sure so like. i'm gonna say he's just a successful lawyer who has radarsense but never got yoinked away from the orphanage by stick and never got training so like. hemndhdjsjnow the QUESTION is who finds that matt because there's a Very Different outcome depending on if like. murderdock meets him first or the matt from hobopeters universe does

hmm. murderdock comes in first like gwen does but doesn't out himself as competent w like swords and shit. but he OH HES THE OPPOSING FORCE FOR UH A COURT CASE MATT IS IN AND MATT HAS NO IFEA HOW SIMILAR THEY LOOK BECAUSE HES BLIND HRNNNNNHSHDHDHDJ and then matt from HP's universe comes in like HEY YOURE ME RIGHT. what the FUCK i need the laws in this dimension STAT and murderdock ':"sees" him and is like ah fuck. my goose may be uhhh cooked

ok mileses matt is like 'so what brought y'all here??? hhh????  and murderdock sighs and goes well my boss who's not really my boss from MY universe is doing something stupid here and opened a dimensional portal and it could maybe tear the multiverse apart which i guess i'm not stoked about' and matt's like 'who's your boss?' and murderdock begrudgingly says 'wilson fisk' and matt immediatley goes >:O because he's CONSTANTLY defending people who were injured as a result of what fisk and his company do

anyways. matt immediatley rushes to foggys because "foggys my partner, he's helped me deal with fisk, he knows him, he can help," and he swings open the door and like. one of two things happens actually either A: foggy is like matt. MAATT. AHAT IS GOING ON WH. WHY IS THERE A TALKING DEER WEARNING SPANDEX WHO CLIMBED THROIGH MY WINDOW MATT PLEASE HE SAYS HES Y O U or like. matt walks in and deerdevil is playing pattycake with robodog and daredevil noir is incessantly flirting with foggy and when matt comes in foggys like 'hey. i don't know what's going on but i think i'm trading my best friend'

murderdock is like...the cool college student who tells freshies about weed murderdock: so, you don't know how to fight right  matt: no??? i'm blind??? md: but you can kinda see right. matt: yeah like a radar kinda md: normal blind people can't do that you know matt: they wHAT md: you can listen to heartbeats if you try hard enough. you can tell when people are lying matt: i can W H A T md: yeah. what me to teach you how to kill a man matt: W H AT NO IM A L A W Y E R WH

hrnnn the matts in this universe push our matt away to stay with foggy because he doesn't deserve 2 die and you KNOW every matt pushes people away but foggy is like. matt i know you tried it's ok i lov you buddy and he's like HRGGHHHH FUNCK YOU and makes foggy tell him stories untill he can distinguish lies and hide in a place around their office untill matt can like. find him instantly and training montage shit you feel me and he rolls up to the collider in his black pjs like "hello my fellow devil men. i hear you all have no plan. well. i don't either but i'm here" and one matt is like. how did you go-OH YOU DID IT and all the mats high five and cry a littlethey're still reluctant to let matt come help but they're all like. "we're all depressed and suicidal anyways we all have big guilt and if we didn't let him i lnOW he's gonna have big guilt forever he can stay"

THE PENUMBRA PODCAST AU:

foggy is a private eye, kinda depressed a lil bit, and he works w his secretary karen who helps him with tech and stuff because he is god awful at all that 

"mike whatevermaggiesmaidennameis" is an occult specialist from dark matters agency assigned by an agent natasha of dark matters to help him with his current case. 

foggy does NOT want to do this with any damn occultist or whatever the hell but before he can escape mike shows up and god DAMN is he charming and catches him before he can climb out the window, so. that's that for introductions. anyways, hijinks, elektra is cassandra, if you care listen to the murderous mask, anyhoo foggy stars to notice something is kinda weird about matt but brushes it off. they finish investigating and retrieve an important artifact.

it's cold, mike says. sorry dude, all the places near here are closed, foggy says. is your place? mike asks. oh, says foggy they go back to foggys place and maybe make out a little bit, but foggy realizes oh shit, mike just tried to steal the keys to my safe where i stored the artifact, shit, and plaxces him under arrest before he can do anything, and calls the cop cops.

they come to take mike away, and minutes later foggy finds a note, scrawled INCREDIVLY messily, in his pocket. "sorry," it says, "i wasn't tricking you about anything i said, and i meant everything i did. -matt murdock ps. check around, say, X avenue. you may have to do a bit of cleanup." when foggy checks cameras that overview there, he find the officers that took murdock from his apartment hogtied together, and sees their clothes strewn on the ground - forming letters - with love. their car is gone. PODCAST AU:

matt listens to podcasts a lot right and so foggy is like hmm mayhaps this is a good idea. but the type of podcasts they listen to differs so incredibly like matt listens to serial and the wildest one he listens to is probably judge john hodgman whereas foggy listens to shitpost podcasts like mbmbam and can i pet your dog foggy keeps referencing mbmbam around matt because he just assumes that he listens to it and matt is so confused every time and one day foggy says "damn matt you're really horny for this one huh" and matt just snaps and says FOGGY WHAT DO YOU M E AN

so then they are like oh shit you're not listening to the good ones. no YOURE not listening to the good ones. solution?  listen together which means sharing earbuds which means sitting next to eachother on small college bed which means????? cuddling

also eventually they decide fuck it. let's make our own podcast and they combine the mbmbam and jjh format so they get questions and do goofs and stuff and then give actual legal advice but sometimes foggy will be like "ok. here's what you do. you need a cat? go into the pet shelter and take one. what are the gonna do beat you up with their cat toys? didn't think so." and matt starts crying because "Fo g g y WE ARE LAWYERS I KNOW YOURE GOOFING BUT THATS ILLEGAL FOGGY YOI CANT TELL OUR LISTENERS TO GO DO CRIME"

COFFE SHOP AU:

matt has a caffeine addiction and constantly comes to foggys coffee shop and orders one black coffee every morning and foggy eventually is like. hey buddy. do you EVER drink ANYTHING F U N EVER

matts like...no...i need coffee as strong and dark as my soul... and foggys like ok edglelord. wait up i'm about to change your life

foggy makes him a latte that's just a little bit caramelly but not too sweet and he's like here. drink this. no charge you deserve to live a little. also here's your boring edgy coffee you still have to pay me for that one. matt tries it and he's like hmm. not bad, but just not. Good and foggy is like wow fuck you. i'm going to find a good drink for you that isn't this hell water so every morning matt comes in and foggy gives him a black coffee and a free Fun and Cool coffee on the house

matt always is polite even when foggy can tell he DESPISES what foggy made but he's not going to stop untill he finds something god damn it matt

ok anyways they start meeting up more. matt starts taking his breaks in the coffee shop and and foggy hmmm...always seems to have a shift off when matt comes down..hmm. coincidence....hmmm....theo suffers for him by covering all his shifts when matt comes in and he's like well, actually fuck work

eventually foggy is like hey dude. do you wanna test my drinks before they go on the menu or help me perfect my recipes and shit you have a good toungie right (matt goes apeshit, because fuckin FOGGY YOU CABT SAY THAT) but he's like haha yeah. that'd be fun. haha

and then foggy finds out matt is INCREDIBLE at baking when he hands him a cookie and matt goes. hmm. too much flour add a fourth a cup less and a pinch more of saltand he's like??? bitch. i'd like to see you do better. and then matt does

so basically every day foggy closes up a little earlier and lets matt in and they dick around in the kitchen and bake and make coffee and foggys shop gets more and more popular because hey this already really good joint just started selling the most BALLER carrot cAke waht the fucké

anyways fall comes around and foggy is like GUES WHATT ITS TIME FOR WHITE GIRL DRINKS TRY THIS and he gives matt a pumpkin spice latte and matt is like. •.• THIS IS IT. THATS THE ONE

and foggy starts crying MATT PLEASE YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. PKEASE MATT, MATT I CANT ADD PSL YEARROUND BECAUSS YOURE A BASIC WHITE BITCH MATT

he bullies foggy into keeping the latte on the menu by threatening to stop helping him bake and foggy is SO OFFENDED, on behalf of good taste everywhere, matt, please,

anyways foggy continues rags on matt for only liking the shittiest fucking drink god damn it matthew fucking hell i make you 3 billion and THIS is the one you pick you disaster and matt is like haha shut up. stoopid

foggy doesn't, and you can guess where this be headed because i'm gay and soft,

matt kisses him and foggys like. ?????????? and matt goes AH FUCK. I COULDNT THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO GET YOU TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH SORRY. GUESS ILL GO and foggy throws cookie dough at him and drags him back over because he's not leaving fuck that. fuck you. and then they're happy and domestic the end

wait i lied matt opens a pro-bono firm in the back of foggy's shop and he gives all his clients freshly baked dessert and coffee and he's so good at being a lawyer and foggy becomes so good @ running his shop that customers keep coming and they're the Cute Gay Couple everyone knows abt and loves

ACCIDENTAL (?) KISSING:

SO. there are so many god damn moments foggy nearly fucking breaks and smooches matt out of sheer unbridled uwu soft feelings. SO MANY. when they win their first mock trial together and matt looks so FUCKING happy and he tells foggy how good they work as a team and foggy is about to lose his mind but he just goes. 'haha yeah' and gives matt a fist bump they finish taking the bar: matt's had to take it in a seperate room, stupid blind accommodations. he finishes first because OF COURSE HE DOES HE'S MATT MURDOCK and the second foggy finishes and leaves the room he sees matt there and he's filled with so many emotions he's about to go apeshit but he manages to contain them JUST enough not to make out with matt on the spot but gives him the tightest fucking hug and matt's like "ok buddy! love you too! please dont break my ribs!" and foggys too happy to notice matt forgot to flinch like he didnt know foggy was coming

Foggy gets the sign to matt and he can tell how fuckin stoked matt is and all he can think about is how grateful he is that the two of them get to work together and fucking do GOOD together and he's trying to express that in his awkward foggy way and he's GOING to kiss him right then and there!! hes about to do it look out world!!! and then matt says "you're NOT going to kiss me" and foggy realises haha YEAH THATD BE A BAD IDEA HUH and jokes it off and gives matt another hug - "i'll be careful not to break the ribs this time, buddy, seems like you've been falling over and hurting yourself enough recently,"-

foggy almost kisses matt out of anger when he finds out he's daredevil, when he won't shut up about how this city needs him and foggy would have done the same and blah, blah, bullshit because maybe then he'd FUCKING listen to him, or at least it'd shut him up, but the honest betrayal he feels - at matt for not telling him and at himself for STILL having a part of him that wants to kiss matt - is enough to get him just to leave : ^)

alright. the gang is watching fisk get carted away and see that SHIT, he's broken out, of course it wasnt going to be this easy. matt puts karen in a taxi goes to run off and foggy grabs him by his coat because MATT. you're not going to go fight fisk in your god damn pajamas right now it's too dangerous you're going to die you stupid son of a bitch idiot

and of course matt doesn't listen, he tells foggy to get back into the car with karen, go to his place, they'll be safe there, and grabs his own taxi

and foggy's left to sit there with karen in the cab as it drives Oh Too Fucking Slowly to matt's, and he's mumbling curses all the way and karen is trying to calm him down, he doesnt know why he's so worried, and all foggy can think about is what if matt dies because i didnt stop him and what if karen never gets to hear it from him and about 10 billion what-ifs that wont leave him the FUCK alone, and he sits next to the windowsill he knows matt comes in through and waits, not even wanting to look at the tv because what if he sees worse news Hrgh

matt beats up fisk and he barely even waits for the cops to get there, he gets one look and confirms 'yup, that's mahoney,' and fucking BOOKS it to his apartment, he climbs through the window and foggy's just sitting there waiting, karens in the next room watching the broadcast at a 3 minute delay on her phone, matt doesnt have a tv hes BLIND >:,\

and when matt comes in, bloody and beaten up and doing That Panting Thing He Does, but definitley alive, foggy just fucking. grabs him by the shoulders and kisses him because HE IS A L I V E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and matt is suprised but he doesnt even try to protest because he's still riding the adrenaline from the fight

anyways. foggy pulls away for air and says 'you're so fucking stupid and i hate you' and then matt kisses hIM because uhh, thats FOGGY

and it's a minute later that matt senses another heartbeat and realizes karen's standing in the doorway, and she raises an eyebrow and obviously trying not to panic asks 'uh, foggy, pray tell, buddy, why you're making out with the devil in matt's bedroom' and foggy goes apeshit and tries to think of an excuse that doesn't invole 'uh thats matt' but it just kinda comes out as some stupid shit like 'i,,, uh,,,,, secret,...affair,,?i',m....gay." and matt just sighs and pulls off his helmet like "hey karen. it's me. hey karen whats poppin its me blind matt murdock" and needless to say they all have a Lot to talk abt

DRUNK KISSING:

so like. the first year they're together matt and foggy go out a lot, and it's mostly foggy dragging matt places and matt reluctantly coming because A) if someone doesnt watch foggy this idiot is going to puke and pass out in a ditch and B) he really like his company shh. no telling because that gay

anyways matt usually only drinks a little but foggy is mad lightweight right. he doesn't get shitfaced too often, usually only after exams or when he knows he has no classes the next day. when he does get shitfaced though he absolutley loses his shit and becomes even more touchy than usual, which is VERY TOUCHY because fuck you its my au and i get to choose the default affection levels

so basically. once foggy starts hugging matt and leaning on him and whining into his shirt about the 'hot girls' and 'killer nachos' at the party matt knows it's time to head home and foggy is too busy wrapping his arms around matt to notice he's being dragged out untill its too late

and y'know, thats fine, that's usual, all normal friend stuff, except what foggy also has a tendancy to do when he's drunk is kiss matt. sometimes its on his cheeks, or his forehead, or his shirt?? matt doesnt get that one??? and sometimes foggy even tries to go for the lips when hes particularly wilde. matt knows to expect this by the third time they go out, but it's still always a suprise when it happens, because sometimes it'll be out of nowhere when theyre walking back, or foggy'll stop matt and grab his cheeks and kiss him? sometimes they'll get all the way back to the dorm and matt will make foggy lie down and foggy will grab his shirt and pull him close enough to give him a quick peck before rolling over and promptly beggining to snore

which, y'know, is absolutley great for a maybe-gay-for-his-best-friend-catholic. what's also great is that foggy never seems to remember the fact he kissed matt the night before, and if he does, he definitley does NOT bring it up

so that's fine. whatever. thats life and matt will pretend like he doesnt care when foggy gives him a smooch because hes straight and loves girls and jesus christ, no homo, amen

but THEN. . then matt and foggy have been studying for exams for weEKS and theyre FINALLY DONE, FINALLY, and they are both going to get wasted out of their mINDS you better BELIEVE IT

so they do! and eventually they stumble back to their dorm together and sit together on the floor with a half-downed bottle of tequila and matt decides fuck it. he tells foggy he's never kissed a guy and foggy is like "haha cool. i have." matt's like "haha was it good" and foggys like "hell yeah man better than girls" so matts like hmm. "foggy i think i want to kiss a guy" and you can guess where this is goin

foggy is an oblivious little shit and just thinks matt's having a gay awakening so he's like "oh cool" and matt starts vibrating at inhuman frequency because FOGGY THIS IS THE ONE TIME I"M BASICALLY ASKING YOU TO DRUNK KISS ME AND YOU D O N T" so he just goes "haha yeah." and foggy's like "haha yeah"

and then matt chugs the bottle of tequila and says "foggy i think i wanna kiss you" and then he does but he's a good christian and also stupid so he just like. goes mwah on foggy's cheek

and foggy stares at him for like 15 seconds before basiclly challenging him to 'kiss him like a man, murdock, how are you supposed to get the gay experience if you dont go all in' and then they make out for like 20 minutes and life is good

(they both wake up w the worst fucking hangovers and theyre passed out on the floor and matt's like "foggy....im gay..." and foggys like "haha do you remember i kissed you" and matts like "????foggy i kissed YOU" and foggys like "oh yeah you did. you should have done that earlier" and matts says "????you were too busy trying to kiss me" and foggy goes "oh haha i was. cool" and then they fall back asleep...then they.....boyfriend.s)

FLOWER SHOP/TATTOO ARTIST AU:

so. matt is a florist and he runs a little shop across the street from an empty piece of real estate. a tiny place that used to be a deli but had just the WORST sandwiches, it was no wonder they closed down, god damn. anways. matt runs his shop with his best friends kirsten and karen who have IMPECCABLE taste in flowers and less impeccable taste in impulse control and not being huge lesbians.

one day this dude pulls up into matt's shop. his request is maybe the strangest matt's ever heard - 'can you get me two bouquets of like, the most metal flowers you have? like, ones that just look super cool but also, yknow, smell super good and sick and shit?' 

matt laughs, and tells the guy that yeah, he can't help with the looks part, but he'll make sure to get him some that smell 'quote' sick and shit, come back tomorrow morning and they'll have some ideas-hey, what are these for anyways?

and the guy tells him, oh, hah, i'm moving in across the street, opening a little tattoo place? wanted some flowers to make it seem more, uhh....welcoming. matt laughs and says yeah, sure, cool, and tells him if he has anymore questions to call the store and ask for matt. the guy tells him if he ever wants a tattoo just cross the street and ask for foggy and unless the flowers matt gives him really suck he won't do him dirty and tattoo a dick on him

so anyways, they have a couple meetings, foggy decides on the flowers he wants and thanks matt and tells him hey, he should come check out the shop, it's opening tomorrow, and foggy wants to be able to point to the guy who did the sick florals. matt doesnt have anything better to do and he likes the sound of this guy's voice so hell, he might as well

when he goes over matt realizes oh shit. he really is out of his element here, but he asks the guy at the counter for 'foggy' and is led over to  a corner where foggy's sitting and tattooing...himself? and matt realizes hey. i kind of have no idea what this dude looks like

so he sorta. sits there awkwardly untill he asks like. 'uh. i cant actually see what youre doing' and foggy goes OH IM SO FUCKING STUPID. i'm. man, saying this out loud seems kinda really stupid and cheesy i cant believe i have to do this...i'm....it's one of the flowers in the bouquet you made me....i just thought it looked really neat and smelled good and it....kinda reminds me of you and OK i KNOW that sounds really weird we met like 4 days ago BUT you seem super cool and i kinda hope we can maybe like. be friends or hang out or something,

and matt's like. o//////o yeah okay. uh. thats cool. thats cool uh im sure the flower is really pretty haha i love that type haha UH DO YOU WANT TO GET LUNCH OR SOMETHING haha maybe ill get a flower tattoo one day its pretty cool that you do tattoos UH IM FREE TOMOROW WAIT MAYBE THATS TOO SOON IM SORRY UH IM FREE WEDNESDAYS,

and foggy just kinda laughs and says 'no, tomorrow works,' and hey! they make plans and get coffee together and matt's like so. what tattoos do you have and foggy starts listing a bunch and eventually matt's like :( i wish i could see them they sound beautiful and foggy's like. here. heres my arm can i. yeah ok. and he grabs matts ar,m and he's like ok. feel the skin, its still a little raised can you feel that? ok, run your fingers over here and i can like. tell you wjats there

cue like an hour of sensual arm touching and tattoo explaining and the more matt learns about foggy and his tattoos and the more he hears the way he talks the more he's like A) oh fuck, i kinda really like this guy whos letting me feel up his arms and B) do i want a tattoo? i kind of want a tattoo

anyways. time jump they hang out a bit more, foggy always comes into matt's shop and talks to him in between customers, shows him the patterns he's designing, etc, and one day he comes in with a paper that has a design of some flowers on it and shows it to matt and as he's running his fingers across it he stops and says 'foggy? will you do this to me'

and foggys like 'bud are you sure? first tattoo, right, do you-are you really sure you want to do this, like, when, and wh" and matt's like 'shut up and put this ink in my skin before i chicken out' so matt sits through a PAINFUL ASS TATTOO and when it's done he's like FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT CAN I TOUCH IT FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT and foggy has to physically restrain matt from fondling his tattoo because its FRESH MATT

so foggys like 'ok, this is cause for celebration! babys first ink! we;re getting beers cmon' and they both go out to drink and matt's like 'hey foggy...can i touch more of your tattoos' and foggy's like 'uh, sure, i have another armfull,' and they do that for a while untill matt gets to the one foggy did the first time he visited foggy's tattoo parlor and foggy's like hah. remember this one? and matt's like yeah. i do. and they kinda just. sit there for a minute and then foggy's like 'ok. im gonna kiss you now punch me if you hate this, flowerboy' and matt absolutley does not punch him, thank you very much

and when they finish having their moment matt's like 'wow. i shoulda....i shoulda asked to feel you up again way sooner if i knew you were gonna do that' and foggy's like 'hey...i'd let you feel me up anytime' and they both kind of laugh and decide ok, worm, this works, and decide theyre gonna do that more often

they start to go out for drinks / dinner / lunch / any time they possibly can, and matt learns the curvature of foggys (suprisingly muscley?) arms down to a t, but he runs out of space to run his fingers over one night, and foggy kisses him and says 'hey. i've got more tattoos, y'know, but i don't think many people would appreciate it if i showed them off to you here' and matt is like 'wh-O H'

and foggy laughs and drags him to his apartment and pulls of his shirt and says 'ok, we're alone now. tell me what you feel' and matt sits on the bed in front of him and theres lots of sensual chest stroking going on and then yeah. matt gets fed up with all this touching foggy and not enough of foggy touching him and. they fuck oopsie

and after that they decide worm. that was good, wanna do that more often, holy shit, and decide to actually date date and thats like. thats that babey!

but years later they open a joint shop, an absolute mess of soft/punk aesthetics and everyone knows them because matt is still a soft florist who just has a fewwwww dozen flowers inked all over him and foggy is the punk god who flexes his sleeves all over town but flexes his soft boyfriend husband even more tHE END

[readyfornothing]

I made a mistake coming here to my mom's house in this fragile state of mind.

After years of being told she doesnt remember any of the abuse she did, that she just blocked it out, she finally brought up that I cant talk to her about the abuse because she remembers it and that she lives with the guilt of it so bringing it up isnt good because she doesnt know how to process her own guilt.

It's not my fault that I have vivid flashbacks of the shit she did. Of almost dying because of her. Of the only reason I didnt get hit when I had a flare up so bad I couldnt even roll over in bed was because I was lucky enough to have the cops knock right as she got to me.

She feels guilty for what she did but I feel guilty for breathing. For taking up space. For needing help. For not being able to save my sisters from being beaten on the ground in front of me. For so fucking much but yes! Please tell me that you're "paying for it the rest of your life" because you finally feel bad for doing these things to your children.

God I need Brandon to have a day off soon. God fuck I need him to have a day off soon so I can go get help because I want to hurt her and it makes me feel guilty which makes me want to hurt myself instead. I know I have the right to be angry and hurt but I also feel like I dont because the whole reason I can even go get help is because i'm on her insurance.

I just wanna make the flashbacks stop. I just wanna not lash out at people. I just wanna stop wanting to kill myself for stuff I couldnt control.

It hurts so bad. It hurts so fucking bad.

I cant even call anyone to vent because shes awake and if she hears me then she'll be mad/upset with me and as much as I wanna hate her, I dont so her feelings matter to me and I dont wanna inconvenience her with the trauma shes put me through.

How fucking pathetic am I