#i dont know which spoiler tag people are using. but that should be enough

[starphobe]

why does she look so demure here .... filled with all the patience and grace of our lord... perhaps .......

[whirlerwhirler]

my stage/fright thoughts!!!!!!

The two times (unless there were more!!) that Toby was onstage I knew it wasnt Reece, but by the time he was there for the second time I saw ("curtain call"), I had completley forgotten the first (opening theatre scene). The first time, I just thought i must have been wrong about it not being him after they switched, and then at the "curtain call" bit I thought "he has aged strangely in the past few minutes" lmao

Genuinely thought for a moment that Steve was gonna say his wife had died and I had missed an update before i put two and two together about the switch. Felt horrible 10/10.

I wonder if theres people out there who aren't that into the show or who dont know their faces well enough that they might have believed that they were watching a show without Reece in it when that was "revealed"?

LOVE Reece doing ridiculous physical comedy fuck OFF he's so good at it!!!! Chopping off his own leg????? Creepin round the stage in his pyjamas like a nasty lil gremlin?? He's SO FUCKING GOOD AT IT AND HE SHOULD DO IT MORE

I could never have imagined that Steve's character from AQNI, when allowed to speak, is literally just the icon that is Barry Baggs. Same voice, same manerisms, same loveable moron absolutley fuckin everyones plans up because he wants a snack. Perfection.

I had seen a spoiler 2 days ago - photos of them in their "Tears Of Laughter" costumes and thought they looked too much like angels for the twist not to be that they're both dead, which really pissed me off and I still maintain that that tumblr user who posted them is a n absolute dickhead because they spoiled the final twist and whole ending of the show. There are signs ALL OVER the theatre saying not to post anything online and no one else that I've seen literally in the whole fandom has posted untagged spoilers.

anyway

STEVE STEVE STEVE STEVE STEVE yeah u get it but let me say it more STEVEN JAMES ELIZABETH PEMBERTON THE MAN THAT U ARE. DONT EVEN START made me cry a lil even tho I knew Reece wasnt actually dead and just in general watching him perform anything is GLEEFUL AND JOYOUS AND HE IS A MASTER OF HIS CRAFT (BAFTA FOR BETTER MAN PLEASE)

I thought it had JUST the right amount of references to the series. Now that I think about it, it makes sense that they would do all of BCDR. They started all the TLOG live shows with a first act full of sketches from the TV show before doing something new, so it makes sense that they do the same here. And it makes sense that they would pick their most successful and beloved episode (one that paralells some of their own careers and relationship to an extent too). I always found the BCDR wasnt a particularly funny episode, all the puns and physical comedy was more charming and sad, and that was mostly due to Reece's performance and the writing of Tommy (Steve u are absolutley BAFTA worthy in most roles but for this particular episode it does kinda baffle me that Reece was overlooked because he is just so good in it). but actually being in the room with them, being performed to an audience as they were "written" to be was a completley different experience that has changed the episode for me i think!

Reece and Steve both canonically dead in the INo9 universe, or maybe even the extended pembersmith cinematic universe? maybe now they can write something where they dont end up playing themselves being haunted by their work and characters? if not who cares cos i love it when they do

the SET DESIGN!!! especially the hospital scene! its so fuckin visually engaging!

loved the use of the camera onstage, was a really fun device and incredibly well done!

i had heard the term "celebrity guest" in a tag about the show and expected maybe that they had like a guest onstage every few days or a new guest every week, but have just realised they have a new guest every day!!!! so cool to see how many people love their work and respect them to come out for a single evening of work with them, even people who werent already guest stars on the show. i didnt know our guest star, but she was funny and really engaging throughout her scene haha

oh to be a fly on the wall in their little office while they were writing this. "and what if youre dead all along? not your character, YOU. and i walk offstage crying and thank the audience for being so supportive of your understudy? and what if we make 90 different celebrity guests attempt a flamenco dance and a geordie accent on stage?"

spotted the hare ofc

LOVED the live violins!

i hope they do film it. i know with the celebrity guest thing no two shows are the same but i hope they have a specific guest in mind to film it with because i'd love to see it again and pick up on all the things i missed, plus there are people around the world who the live show isnt accessible to who deserve to be able to join in with the fandoms discussions and celebrations of it

anyway i'm very tired because ive done 6 hours of travelling today, the theatre seats were wildly uncomfortable and also i live underneath a crack den so i havent had a full nights sleep for 11 months, so thats all i have brain space for today! really enjoyed the show. so glad i got the tickets even tho it was a stupid financial decision lmao

[jackfuckingtwist]

okay. so now that it’s been 24 hours and i have sat with it for a bit, i want to talk about babel. because now that i don’t have to worry about spoilers i have wandered into tags and seen some reviews and. ah. spoilers ahead for sure.

people who don’t like the book keep describing it as “heavy-handed” and “clunky” when i think the word that they are actually looking for is “direct.” because if you read then summary on the back of the book, if you read the introduction and the annotations and actually meet the author where she is at, then quite frankly none of this direct language about empire and where oxford specifically stands in it should surprise you at all. (and yes, british men in the late 1800s absolutely did talk about foreign cultures like that. unashamedly so. they were just that convinced of their “innate” superiority.)

but it’s interesting because i think this also ties into another theme i’ve noticed of people who DID like the book claiming that “i didn’t expect it to go so hard at the end” to which i also think they are missing the point. the reason some people think that the book only goes hard in the last third is because that is when the threat of physical violence is no longer a threat anymore. but that threat is present throughout the entire novel, in almost every interaction. robin literally loses his entire family on page one. and yes, he loses them to cholera, however, it is revealed when he returns to canton that they were affected so severely by the illness because they were left destitute in the wake of opium addiction orchestrated by the british government. how is that not also violence?

robin doesn’t live because professor lovell cares about him, robin lives because he is viewed by lovell as the only person worthy of living because he is still young enough to be molded into a tool for the empire. i dont have the text in front of me so i cant remember if it is stated explicitly, but it is at least very heavily implied that robin was only born to be used as such a tool. how is that not also violence?

from the moment robin steps foot in england, it is made explicitly clear, under no uncertain terms, that his security in life (if you can call it that) is entirely conditional on his academic performance and subsequent service to the colonial project. lovell literally tells him that if he cannot perform satisfactorily that he has absolutely no qualms leaving him to die on the street. and that’s not even getting into how the rigorous curriculum he was given caused him to forget his own mother tongue. how is that not also violence?

all of this happens before he even turns ten. before he steps a single foot into oxford. he is beaten with a fire poker for displaying normal child behavior and notes that lovell knows exactly where to hit him so nobody knows (he’s done this before. probably, it can be assumed, to griffin).

even before robin knows about griffin and the hermes society etc etc, he is told that the most prestigious positions granted by a babel education is as a military translator. this, too, is violence, he learns the hard way, because what else is a translator aligned with the british army going to do besides translate dishonestly in order to get what they want? there is absolutely no intention of a fair negotiation, it is 100% about what can be extracted for britain above all else (something americans certainly perfected with westward expansion as well but babel is not about the u.s). what he, and a lot of the babel scholars, either fail to realize or willfully choose to ignore (at least until they can’t any longer) is that you don’t have to be the one throwing the punch in order to be a perpetuator of the violence. this realization is one of the major threads of inner turmoil among robin, ramy, and victoire. it’s why it takes them so long to fully commit themselves to the cause. it’s why robin and victoire don’t actually do anything until ramy and anthony are dead and they realize they have nothing left to lose but their lives.

and it is this very same idea that robin comes back to at the end of the book. when he insists that anything he does, regardless of how morally repugnant it seems, is not his fault if he warns parliament in advance and they choose to do nothing. parliament’s days of inaction in the face of the collapse of westminster bridge is violence just as much as robin removing the resonance rods.

so, the way readers miss these concepts is fascinating, because it shows that people are not actually reading what rf kuang said. they are taking the bits and pieces that they like, and extrapolating a different meaning from that. and given what the book is literally about, and that a lot of the people making these comments are white, it’s simultaneously beautifully and infuriatingly ironic.

[narcolini]

night//morning

marcus x luca, long distance pining perhaps?, 2k words tw for talking about death, specifically parents a/n: this contains s2 spoilers!!! dont say i didnt warn you!! also im taking an absolute leap of faith with what those missed calls mean so call it divergence from canon, or assumption of canon, or . yknow. enjoying free real estate idk (same with luca backstory hehe) tagging @drabbles-mc because it exists for her <3

Luca’s phone rings, just minutes before his usual alarm gets chance to—sending that weird fucking tune that Instagram uses, pin-balling from his nightstand, straight into his skull—screen lit and blinding. He should keep it on do not disturb, yeah, he knows that, but as disruptive as it is, this is exactly the reason he doesn’t. It’s meant to wake him up, because there aren’t many people that would message him this early in the morning, and there’s only one that’d ring him over Instagram, of all places. Free of charge and desperately reliant on the good of their internet connections.

‘Yo.’ He clears his throat after picking up, rubbing a hand across his sleep-filled eyes. He’s on his back still, phone to his ear, smirk toying the edges of his mouth once they’ve woken up enough. ‘I’m guessing you got the parcel, then?’

The line is silent in response, and stays so for long enough that he pulls the phone away to check the call’s still connected. His eyes are bleary from the brightness of it, but it is, connected and split screened, both profile pictures staring back at him. Clock counting.

‘Marcus?’ he asks, speaking back into the phone. ‘Think we’ve got a bad connection, mate.’

More quiet. The hum of what sounds like an industrial extractor fan, if he really tries to listen for it. 

‘Can you hear me?’ he asks. 

‘Yeah,’ Marcus says eventually, staccato through the phone, ‘yeah, I, um.’ 

So it’s not the wifi. And there’s an edge to his voice that strips all remaining sleep from Luca's, and pulls him upright until he’s sitting, pillows rolling under his back. ‘You alright?’

‘Sorry.’

‘For what?’

Marcus sighs. The connection warps it into something robotic. ‘Calling you.’

‘Well, I assume there’s a reason for it.’ He wouldn’t ring for nothing, and he wouldn’t struggle if there wasn’t something forcing him to. ‘What’s up?’

Silence again, then the gulls, waking outside Luca’s window. Loud and begging before the sun’s even finished rising. Marcus isn’t doing anything to try and compete with them, though they must be audible to him too, so for a moment it feels like they’re a part of the conversation. Getting their turn while the both of them wait. 

He shouldn’t yawn, he shouldn’t, even with the pause, and he’s really trying not to. Swallowing nothing. Clenching his jaw, relaxing it again. Fighting it back with every trick he knows.

It happens anyway. Loud and stretching down the line. 

‘You want to talk about something else,’ he asks afterwards, since his eyes are starting to droop, ‘until you can talk about whatever it is that’s happened?’

Marcus coughs, dry and purposeless. Forced maybe. ‘I don’t know. I guess.’

That’s good enough. ‘Alright. Where are you?’

It’s a start. Where are you, Marcus, when you should be at home making something to eat, or at work, scrubbing dried dough from the counters. 

‘Out the back,’ he replies, sounding tired with it. Defeated, even.

‘The back of the restaurant?’

‘Yeah. Sitting on a,’ he laughs weakly, ‘a fucking, upturned bucket.’

‘Right. A bucket. That’s the luxury we aim for, isn’t it? As chefs.’

‘Yeah, something like that.’

Upturned buckets and 4AM alarms—which he’s just shut off, now that it’s finally buzzed into life against his ear. 

‘Tough night?’ he asks, sitting up from the pillows. He doesn’t have to go right away, but he has to at least start the process, one step at a time.

The phone cracks as Marcus coughs again. It’s definitely forced, aimed to dislodge whatever’s catching his words before they make it to Luca's ear. ‘Nah, um, good night actually,’ he says. ‘First run with the new, well, new everything. Friends and family.’ 

‘Really?’ Luca smiles. It carries into his voice. ‘Wow, congrats, man.’

‘I mean, it was all Syd and.’

He never finishes the sentence. 

Luca checks the phone again, not to see the connection, but for the time instead. To know how quick he’s going to have to move, if he lets himself be lazy for a little longer.

‘You get that, what was it…?’ He sighs down the line once it’s back to his cheek, rubbing at his sleep-swollen face. ‘Sorry, that bavarois you made, you get it onto the menu?’  

Marcus smiles, or at least he hopes he does. It sounds like it when he replies. ‘Yeah, you know, big hit. Fire, in Carmy’s words.’

‘Oh, that’s when you know it’s good,’ he agrees, finally standing from the bed. ‘Proud of you, mate.’

‘Thank-you.’ 

Another silence to fill, and now it’s getting hard to. Because it’s early, and he’s trying to get dressed, tugging one leg, then the other, into his trousers, with the phone pinned to his shoulder, and he’s asked all he can think to ask, without espresso fuelling his system. 

‘You, um, you get my gift?’ he tries, hopping as he pulls them up to his hips. 

But it was badly timed, in the end, because Marcus chose exactly then to say, ‘My mom,’ at the same time. ‘It’s my mom.’

‘Oh, shit.’ Luca stills. Lifts the phone from his shoulder. ‘Is she—did she—I’m sorry. Fuck.’

‘I missed the calls,’ he says, ‘all, fucking, twenty of them. While we were in the shit.’

‘I don’t know what to say.’ He doesn’t know what to do either, standing half-dressed in his half-lit bedroom, half-way across the world. ‘What happened?’

‘I mean,’ he can picture Marcus shrugging, ‘exactly what we knew would happen. Just, y’know.’

Yeah, he knows.

‘I was expecting it,’ he says. ‘I mean, it had to happen one day.’

Luca sighs. ‘I’m so, so, sorry, Marcus.’

‘Nah, it’s. I mean. Yeah. Life sucks, huh? Really fucking sucks.’ He laughs and it sounds weaker than before. ‘I don’t even know what I’m feeling right now.’

Yeah, he knows that too.

‘I wish I could be there,’ Luca admits. It’s a weak offer of support. Not comforting, not helpful. True, though, and that’s all he can give him. ‘Can I do anything?’ he asks, picking at the wooden edge of his drawers. ‘Anything you need, just let me know and I’ll, yeah, I’ll make it happen.’

‘Nah,’ he sighs, ‘sorry, I don’t know why I called you, really. I mean, we’re not even in the same country.’ 

'It's alright.'

'Opened my phone and it kind of just... happened.'

Because he knew Luca would pick up. ‘Well, I’m awake,’ he reasons, ‘and here, if you need to talk.’

‘Yeah, thank-you. I know.’

‘Not much to say though, is there?’

There’s a silence that Luca can only assume is signalling a head shake, over there in Chicago, in the alley, on top of the bucket.

‘It’s not the same,’ he continues, running with it now, ‘well, I guess it is—sort of—but, when my dad died, I sat in my room for weeks. Didn’t say anything to anybody. Couldn’t if I tried.’ 

‘Your dad?’

He doesn’t pause to answer. He’s already losing the momentum he started with, gone the second he invited Dad back into his head. The only thing to do, is try and continue like they’ve spoken about it a million times before, like Marcus knows the whole fucked up backstory.

‘Went to the funeral, all that stuff, the wake, still said nothing. Just, really, shut down, you know? Shut it out. And my sister, she, well she hated that, but—I mean, and then I went to Chicago and—’

‘Luca, I…’ He’s trying to be polite about it, interrupting in a sheepish way, but what he really wants to say is, shut up, man, it’s not the time for this. It’s evident enough in his tone. His pauses. ‘I’m really trying to keep up, but—’

‘My point is,’ Luca says, quickly followed by, ‘actually, I don’t know what my point is. But this is the worst, worst thing you can go through, alright, I know that first hand. It’s the worst. And I’m here, even if you want to just sit on the phone for company, or something.’

A beat. The tinny sound of a siren passing Marcus on the other side of the world.

‘I’m very good at chatting copious amounts of shit, obviously.’ Luca laughs. ‘So, you know. Whatever you need.’

‘I think I need to quit my job,’ he says, and for a second it feels like someone else has taken the phone, because it doesn’t sound like Marcus at all.

‘Come on, you don’t mean that.’

‘No, I do. I missed every call, Luca. Every call, for fucking what? For the Michael? Do you realise how dumb that is?’

Luca twitches, flexing his shoulders back to correct the posture that had never really sunk in the first place. A nervous thing. Something he picked up in culinary school. ‘It only feels like that now,’ he says.

Marcus scoffs.

‘Sleep on it.’

‘Don’t think that’s happening anytime soon.’

‘Yeah, cause you’ve gotta get off that bucket first.’ It’s like taking another exam, he realises, trying to balance hazelnut swirls onto set custard while your hands are shaking. The balance is everything, get it wrong and he’ll chase Marcus away, just like he did with Frankie. Jokey, but understanding. Patient, but moving him still. ‘Go home, Marcus, see how you feel about it in the morning.’

‘I can’t,' he stresses.

And, shit, he forgot that detail. Somehow, in a conversation all about it. ‘Your mum.’ He sighs. ‘Sorry, I should’ve.’ Forget it. Recover, adapt, fix it from another angle. ‘Is Syd still around?’

‘Think so.’

‘Have you told her?’

He lets that question sit for a while, lets the street noise creep back through the phone in place of his answer. Which Instagram lovingly turns into static, really, radio noise that makes Luca wince. 

Then Marcus says, blank and tired, with a thick voice that needs to be cleared, ‘I think I’m gonna go actually. I should go.’ 

‘Oh.’ It takes a moment for him to recover. ‘Yeah, course, do what you need to do.’

‘Thank-you, you know, for picking up.’

‘Don’t worry about it.’

‘And the gift. It means a lot.’

‘Sure, yeah. I’m glad you like it.’

‘Night, man.’

It’s four in the morning, but he says it back, slipping it in right before the call ends. With that bitter little tone in his ear. If that was an exam, he'd've failed. Maybe. Dropped the details and put his thumb through the layers. 

‘Idiot,’ he mutters, tossing the phone onto the end of his bed. ‘When my dad died. Fuck me.’

Marcus will never call again. He’ll never call him again, actually, not until the funeral’s done and he’s starting to heal from it. Why would he? Who wants to hear that? This is the worst, mate, good luck! 

Christ.

He should’ve said nothing, should’ve waited for Marcus to take the lead and gone from there. Not everyone wants what Frankie wanted. Talking for the sake of talking. 

But he’s running late now, and the t-shirt he’s dragged from the drawers is still sitting around his biceps, waiting to be pulled on. Work first. Work first, then fix it with Marcus. Send another gift, or something, book a plane if you have to. 

He puts his head through the hole and reaches for a pair of socks as the t-shirt rolls down his stomach. Then it’s cologne. Hairbrush. The watch he wears, just to take off and store in his locker once he gets there. Everything he needs from this room, before moving on to the next. Besides his phone, of course, which is waiting on the bed still.

When he reaches it, the screen’s lit already, awake with messages he hadn’t noticed.

Going home, it reads. Thanks for talking me through it. 

It’s in his hand now, staring us from his palm, and telling him that Marcus is still typing. 

And typing.

And typing.

Then, finally, 

Sorry about your dad. 

His chest deflates, held breath escaping at last. Long time ago, he types back. Shout me if you need anything. 

There’s no hesitation this time. Just, Cool. Keep the couch free for me, yeah?

Yeah, sure. All yours.

>>>part two

[syrips]

hello im gonna pin this post

hello my name is Syrips, im a super duper simp and simp/self-insert enabler for others who love strahd or any cos/ravenloft/fictional characters

im 28, but i sometimes say im thirty as a vague response because its easier and faster to say (or safer to say to strangers)

i think i am autistic but i am currently only self-diagnosed; i plan to tell my doctors once i compile a binder of reasons why i think im autistic based on noted events in my childhood, behavior, and my reflected perspective on things in pages of charts and text which is a totally neurotypical thing to do

im genderfluid and i am fine with any and all pronouns (different people may use different/changing/fluid pronouns on me, i am completely fine with this)

im polyamorous and pansexual/panromantic, i gush over games that have polyamory/pan options!!

i have huge CoS/Ravenloft spoilers so please, PLEASe do not enter unless you are fine with being spoiled with all kinds of content. i also wont explain what is or isnt 'canon' because, well, some things may be canon for one person, while potential/not-canon for another, so i really cannot confirm or deny it myself.. ask your DM for confirmation! (and for my players who are here, hehe, goodluck figuring it out!)

i do music, art, crafting, and streaming sometimes, here is my linktree: https://linktr.ee/syrips

please 'ask'/message/send me any and all of your curse of strahd and/or ravenloft works of art! this can include these and more!:

playlists

moodboards

art/portfolio/link to your art or artblog

pages of your OC/PC/dnd lore (both player and DM welcome)

campaign/session notes and storytime

canon and potential-/home-/head-canon dumps

narrations/imagines/ao3/google docs/fanfic/fic writings

cool crafts!!

i crave it more than strahd craves blood, please and thank you!

you can also send me stuff and let me know if you want me to gush/simp over it, provide advice, or simply acknowledge it (publicly or privately)! let me know in advance cuz i dont want to make you uncomfortable with what you share

i have no limits on triggering fictional content, just make sure to tw it properly if it is sensitive content for others

my Ask thingy is always open, i may ramble alot if i get passionate enough though so be warned! hehe

ok goodbye ill edit or change this whenever idk

Edit Entry 1 - 11th Moon, 2023

for context, keita/raze (he/him) is my irl partner. he's been a simp for alucard (castlevania) longer than i've begun simping for strahd. i only discovered this years into the relationship when we watched castlevania (where i expected to be a bigger simp for castlevania), and instead HE made high pitch simping noises as alucard appeared on the screen and i was like -sus eyes- wait a GOSH DARN MINUTE-. also, keita has a thing for necks. i shrugged it off when he first told me, but years later i started simping for strahd and now i look back at that moment like 'hm. odd.-'. anyways, i mostly started dating him because he sounds like a kermit the frog southern guy who goes 'howdy howdy' and he says 'i should be golden' unironically and i think thats pretty funny

i tag stuff as #making a keita tag so when keita presses this he can see all the stuff that he likes so that i can organize stuff and incase he ever decides to poke around my blog and use this tag search within my blog

Edit Entry 2 and 3 - 12th Moon, 2023

syrips OC/PC list (loosely alphabetical)

Other People's Adored OC/PC list (loosely alphabetical)

Edit Entry 4 - 7th Moon, 2024

hi huge warning that im fucking WEIRD. like i know people may enjoy the idea of me for entertainment/indulgence purposes but please please. if you ask/tell me to do something, i will 90%-chance take it seriously and respond bluntly/directly. please take my warnings seriously and please please interact with me responsibly!!

and i already know some would be like, 'oh syrips people always say that. they wanna act unique/special by calling themselves weird'. like. thats fair if people dont believe that but please dont be surprised when freakos start feeling more comfortable/vulnerable around you and you become shocked. like. stop trying to shame/blame freakos for what they've warned since the beginning. please, it's hurtful and disrespectful.

my asks are always open, be as blunt/direct as you want. most of my cws will be with "cw: " before it. let me know if you want me to cw tag something!

i use the #be cringe be free tag for weirdos/freakos/happy/indulgent stuff. this can include stuff that isnt 'cringe', and/or cringe we embrace. it's okay to be cringe. it's okay to say cringe culture is dead. it's okay to not see things as cringe. it's okay to embrace the cringe. it's okay to indulge, to be your favorite version of you. it's okay to indulge, even if it's unfamiliar/scary. i use the tag for moments of doing what makes you happy, regardless if youre unfamiliar with that indulgent feeling. be cringe be free!!

[okthatsgreat]

3, 23 and 76 (lgowab) for the ask game?

YAYAYAY!!!

3. describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic nothing TOO out there i dont think...... usually i have a very VERY loose outline of like. here is how the fic starts and here is how it will end, here is how these characters start and here is how they will end. yknow. and sometimes that outline doesnt even happen until a few chapters in LMFAOOOO sometimes i really am just making shit up on the fly !!!!!!!!!!!! i didnt have a set second protagonist in mind for lgowab until that fifth chapter lmfao!!!! IM A FRAUD

but THEN once ive gotten into the rhythm of it i usually write down ideas for further chapters/further dialogue down in an empty discord server, so while its still disconnected there is still SOME organization!!! which means i have a general idea of how these next chapters should go :)

23. best writing advice for other writers? ooooooo there are a few tips i would suggest! one of the more obvious is learn when to use line breaks definitely. don't just make it one big chunk of text! hurts the eyes and makes it less appealing for any new readers that are just chiming in!! also learn a bit more on writing dialogue, and remember that you don't have to add a name tag after every sentence of dialogue!! the readers are smart enough to know who is talking (ESPECIALLY IF ITS ONLY TWO PEOPLE) so constantly going back and forth between Person A said, Person B replied, Person A said, Person B replied gets repetitive!

and then one final piece of advice i TRY to follow for multi-chapter fics is the rule that the character whose pov we are reading from shouldnt be the exact same at the end of the chapter as they were at the beginning of the chapter. for example, if i wrote makoto to be tense at the beginning of the chapter, then the end of the chapter could have him more relaxed. if i wrote miu as confident in the beginning of the chapter, i could write her as unfulfilled and irritated at the end of it. this change can be subtle!!!! its a good tip for preventing stagnant characters/action as you move forward from chapter to chapter :)

76. did you have any ideas that didn't make the final cut of lgowab?

LMFAO HMMMMM LET ME THINK. IM DIVING DEEP INTO MY EMPTY DISCORD SERVER FOR THIS ONE also im just gonna throw this under a cut for spoilers GHFDJGB

ASK GAME!!!

a really REALLY early draft of the scene where makoto calls out a bunch of names had shuichi replacing kaede!! ultimately decided on kaede because it made a LOTTTTT more sense with mius story for her to be called, but i knew that i wanted somebody important from season 53 to be nominated in that scene and shuichi was chosen bc he was friends with himiko

korekiyo was also nearly on the list!

there was another danganronpa theatre event planned! i only wrote the title down so im not super sure about any details, but i thiinnnkkkkk this might have been an alternative scene to the himiko danganronpa theatre event we got (the one with rantaro). it would have starred the below characters and they would have been playing some kind of card game in the hospital. scrapped because the other event made a lot more sense for himiko

and then of course theres a whole bunch of dialogue thats just floating around LMAO

[livecharliereaction]

longer ramble (post tsumihoroboshi part 5)

enough higuing today OK: im rly liking the different protags btw meakashi shion pov and now the rena bits it works VERY WELL! But it also rly makes sense that the first 3 had to be keiichi because to understand renas/shions/rly anyone elses thoughts you have to understand some things about hinamizawa itself so making us play from the pov of a guy who just got here? its kinda the only option. I think those last tips r from the "evil rika" by the way so like demon allegations never stop with her + sonozakis. which of course makes SENSE three families n all that. i think satokos outbursts seem sort of normal for a traumatized child and as i said before; rena can do ANYTHING and ill forever just be able to brush it off with a "ohh shes a weird girl i guess :P" and now that she killed 2 people again i am not changing this statement in the slightest. She can just do that. Let her do whatever the hell she wants ETC. But clearly not a demon from three families with how she describes it all.

In shion pov she did actually call this "evil rika" a demon too so calling her that suffices for now. They do keep saying that the elderly think of rika as a reincarnation of oyashiro. i mean i dont think id be too off the mark to just call that "evil rika" oyashiro but i think its a term made up by the villagers instead of her REAL name so im just gonna call her "evil rika" until they provide me a better way to call her.

I also think that she will be the way this ties into umineko. I know a few facts... 1. theres a character with the same voice casting i dont remembr her name but u know the one who kinda looks like her anyways 2. the playing order should be higurashi first if at all and then umineko because theres characters who will refer to something that happened in higurashi/something youll understand if you have played higurashi... But like even aside from this kinda meta information i know theres a girl who looks like rika a lil too much. OH IDEA? Its just another oyashiro reincarnation 8 generations before or 8 generations after higurashi. Ok that might be jumping to conclusions a little but just something to state so itll be funny to look back at either if that happens OR its actually super false as hell

...as a matter of fact I used to think the other umineko character looked a LOT like satoko but i saw her on the tl the other day i think n i dont think so anymore. Color palettes more similar to miyo takano if i HAD to choose n that seems like a stretch too. OK but i need to mute the wtc tags though because were in peak spoiler territory i feel... Ok.

Also last thing: that time of rena stating she wants to go back in time immediately cut to all of the guys having a nice time without a single mention of the people rena killed (ofc - keiichi pov) but in a way RIGHT NOW? its kinda out in the open if that DID happen until we get rena pov again which i find a little fun.

Oh but one thing does still bother me to no end... Renas mentions of seeing oyashiro before makes literally no sense with the information we have so far. BUT ONCE AGAIN. renas just kinda weird. Maybe thats a conclusion she made because well shes a little weird and also mentioned to be like actually mentally ill. Man how did they write a character like that where shes my absolute #1 favorite no shot but then i trust literally nothing she says??? So funny. Love her

stopping for today though i mean i want to continue but we have to have SOME self discipline left so it all doesnt end in like a week:P ok bye

[woomycritiques543]

As a HB/HH liker, I sincerly apologize on behalf of most of the fandom, As someone who actually likes those shows, i'll admit that they do have major flaws (Seeing Stars was meh for me), but seeing how fans, Especially big fans/artists (Like DaniDraws, Teathekook, Elcee, etc) react to any sort of criticism on twitter, is rather embarrasing to say the least.

(You can imagine the releif when I read the rest of this. lol!)

Thank you, its nice to see someone from the main tags being reasonable for once. Very rare when I end up seeing that.

Its not even just the big artists, its people from Spindlehorse too that act childishly about it. Getting suprised when anyone doesnt like an episode and pitching fits about criticism, acting immature in general.

Speaking about critique in such a condecending way that can only be concluded as "shaming" rather than just dissapointment. Not even admitting to the episode had flaws, but shaming those who critiqued it. Vivziepop being so petty, that she liked this specific post as a way to pretend as if the critiques were "wrong." (putting "ruins the show" in quotations, the way its being said, the emoji, etc.) These being the comments after. With the average "wait for another episode!" excuse when theres now been enough episodes to know most of the quality of how the show will be going forward. This was also written before S2 Episode two, another awful episode, which made this all the more hilarious to read from these people. Also saying "this is just temporary!" or that "im just watching them to prove to the haters that they're "wrong" and they gotta see what happens before they judge them!" as if the last episode didnt fuck up the lore of the past ones (spoiler alert: it did.) which would automatically effect other episodes by default. There also being mostly character decisions that would effect the rest of the show based on how the show is sugarcoating their actions. Not letting them actually develop as a result.

Hince the "ruined" statement the fandom has been saying.

Since- the timeline was ruined, the potiential in certain characters was ruined by the backpeddling and sugarcoating. We dont need to watch other episodes to know this as "ruined". They're that bad.

These episodes are allowed to be judged as themselves Callis (I know there are people from your staff reading this.) we dont need to know "everything" about the show and whats going to happen to stand our ground about how we feel about it. Were not doing this to "assume" about whats going to happen. The show is already bad, this has been proven to us hundreds of times already. No new episode is going to "fix" how much damage thats been done already unless they rewrite the story altogether. The merch, the sugarcoating, and all.

Callis saying that the critiques were "mean" just because they arent the ones who constantly kiss the feet of their favorite ocs and mention that-gasp??? Their "bad people" demon characters are- NOT GOOD PEOPLE?! and- GASP! Should legit be held accountable for their actions?! WOW! Its almost like this isnt the "secretly wholesome" adult cartoon that they wanted it to be but was executed as showing their characters as awful because- GASP! The writers also just happened to not be good people with questionable morals! /j

A group of bad people trying to dictate what's "moral" or not? Who would have guessed that this would eventually lead to the show becoming messed up as all fuck- not even in a good way, but showing messages from the writers terrible enough to make even a 90's series blush.

Its almost like all of this whining about people who critique in the fandom is just an attempt to gaslight people into seeing the critiques as "hot takes" and not anything of actual value. When people are upset for actual reasons. No "youre allowed to critique" gaslighting is going to make us hold back our words. Lmao!

Calis also mentioning a nonsensical critique about Lucifer's new design but not even mentioning what people were actually upset about. Its bias such as this that is just that- "Embarassing."

These people react to the critique like teenagers who just got a f on a test for the first time. Immature, making excuses, and just downright being very condesending, gaslighting, and non-addressing.

So your ask was entirely understandable anon. Thank you for apologizing. It wont do much for how these people effect us, but I do appreciate the empathy. Thank you.

[diavolosthots]

This got really long so i put it under a cut and I'm totally going backward with this series but i cant help myself. I HAVE to start with my husband. Most of these are my own headcanons but please read the warning.

Warning: some of these are confirmed in lessons/devilgrams. If you dont want spoilers, don't read the ones in red. (Also Note: I remember reading all of these either in the game or on the official wiki page but I could not find all the in-game sources if you asked me to. Still, they are tagged as spoilers.)

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾DIAVOLO Life Headcanons☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Diavolo’s dad, the Demon King (whom I Headcanon to be named Daemon. I could write headcanons on that guy too?? Lemme know what you guys want) loved Diavolo’s mom dearly and Diavolo was thus a product of pure love, not necessarily just to have an heir. That’s just a bonus. 

Sadly Diavolo’s mom died in childbirth, leaving only the Demon King and Barbatos to take care of him. 

This caused the King to begin resenting his son and Daemon grew cold. Barbatos was, more often than not, the one who took care of little Diavolo, although Diavolo tried desperately to win his dad’s affections, never truly understanding why his father would hate him. 

Diavolo was a rambunctious child and caused a lot of trouble, much to his father’s dismay, and he found himself in trouble a lot. 

On top of that, Diavolo is also highly emotional and it wasn’t until much later that he learned that tears won’t get him anywhere. Barbatos used to give him sweets and tea every time he cried, which was a lot thanks to his dad.

Although the butler did stop this at some point, that’s definitely where Diavolo’s love for tea came from

Barbatos is definitely, and has always been, someone he confided in, and he found it hard to view him as nothing but a ‘servant’, per his dad. It’s not even that his father hated Barbatos or thought of him as lesser than, he just didn’t like that Diavolo confided more in him than anyone else. 

Diavolo definitely had a rebellious phase as he grew up. The mixture of his absent-father’s non-existent love and the responsibilities put on his shoulders from a very young age got too much for him at some point and let’s just say…. Diavolo had a lot of ‘oopsies’ in his ‘teenage’ years. 

If you know, you know. They are no longer among the living. R.I.P. 

People used Diavolo a lot because of this, though. The lack of care and love at home caused a young Diavolo to be naive and trust too easily, getting hurt in the process

Which is why Barbatos now has a torture chamber for the enemies of Diavolo (or people who just want/use him for the wrong reasons)

When Diavolo didn’t try to escape the castle for some love, he found comfort in art and unbeknownst to both his father and anyone else working at the castle, Barbatos helped him build a mini art gallery up in one of the towers where Diavolo still goes for some relaxation or just to think. 

A lot of people backstabbed him as he grew up and even he himself backstabbed a lot of people as well. At some point he saw the hurt he caused and decided to never lie again, and now he’s always telling the truth, albeit he can beat around the bush a lot, and knows for certain when someone else is lying to him. 

At some point, his father forbade him to treat Barbatos as more than a trusted servant and that pretty much solidified his dislike, not hatred, for his father. 

As he grew up into the man he is now, he started to see his dad as more of an authoritarian ruler that works for his own political gain rather than the well being of everyone. The Devildom was never in shambles, or anything, but one could feel a clear hierarchy and there was definitely tension with the other two realms 

His father was actually the one is (somewhat, if not fully) started the war against heaven (not to be confused with the celestial war that the brothers were part of)

Now, he never hated his father, truly. To a certain extent, he actually understood why his father was the way he was. He lost his beloved wife for a son he had to grow a new relationship with. Diavolo never thought his father hated him, either, but one could tell that their relationship was filled with grief, heartache, and even a sense of regret. 

Diavolo never blamed his father, though, and as he grew older, he took certain aspects of his father’s character into his own: loyalty, ambition, and honesty. 

That’s why his father stepped down, but not fully since Diavolo hasn’t been crowned yet. The Demon King is tired; tired of pushing through the days, and Diavolo understands. 

The situation with his parents is also the reason why Diavolo refuses to settle down so easily. He’s scared of both A.) trusting the wrong people again, like he had many times before, and B.) of having the same fate as his father and mother. 

That and Barbatos is highly protective of him lol Good luck getting past the butler if you want to be with the future King. 

One of the main reasons Diavolo keeps up the naive and himbo attitude is also because he never got to be a kid. His father pushed him straight into royal life once he was old enough to comprehend things. 

This does not mean, though, that Diavolo is actually a himbo. He’s quite intelligent and there’s a reason for everything he does. 

Diavolo doesn’t believe in coincidences and is a firm believer in fate; that everything happens as it should and for a reason (A/N: homie is a determinist and that lowkey makes me happy lol)

That’s why he’s perfectly fine taking his time and doing his thing. He likes to have a certain sense of control, of course, but not to the extent that Lucifer does. He’s cool going with the flow as well. 

Speaking of Lucifer, the reason he views him as a best friend and even family is because Diavolo believes he can relate to the absence of a father that’s supposed to be there no matter what

That and because Lucifer is brutally honest. He doesn’t take Diavolo for granted and he certainly doesn’t want Diavolo around for the riches and fame. Diavolo appreciates that a lot. 

Diavolo gets along with pretty much everyone; he’s very adaptable because he has to be. However, that doesn’t necessarily make him an extrovert. As a matter of fact, he’s actually more of an introvert and likes to keep to himself or with a limited group of close friends

Speaking of friends, Diavolo doesn’t have a lot, if any, outside of the brothers and Barbatos. It’s hard to know who to trust when so many people just want to use him or rob him, even strip him of his title. 

Diavolo is very lonely, as a matter of fact, and he hopes, prays even, that he could find a bond with someone, anyone, like Lucifer shares with his brothers. In a sense, he may even be jealous of the seven. 

Although his life was less than peachy, even if he did have everything anyone could ever wish for, Diavolo craves true emotional connections, which is why he clings to Barbatos and Lucifer. 

This, however, doesn’t mean he is helpless. He’s very much an independent, intelligent, and ambitious man, and he is excited for the future, whatever it may hold. 

[ackerpreach]

This ending .... I can name 500 reasons and I will name them right now, because I don’t think I’m the only one who is upset with how things turned out. (Also, A positive message for all of you at the end)

MAJOR LEAKS SPOILERS/ READ WITH CAUTION

Update: after reading more theories from fellow RM bloggers, and sleeping over it one day, this entire chapter might be an april fools... Don't fully lose hope yet beautiful people. It's me just giving a review on a possible fake April fools chapter

After following this franchise since 2013, so nearly a DECADE. this ending is a pure disserve to the entire fandom. I feel like Yams has rushed it just for the sake of being done with the entire manga. So many things are left open, characters and their developemt are reverted back all the way to chapter 1 or are left even worse than that...

Mikasa’s worthless character development/ Aaronmika’s horrible toxic codependent relationship 

Oh honey... Let’s start with how horrible Isayama has treated her. We were all rooting for her, because we all felt like she was so misunderstood. She had a horrible childhood and imprinted on a guy who treated her like trash 99 percent of the story. And then, slowly but surely, she starts to realize she has to stop obsessing over him in the uprising arc with the help of a real man who treats her like a queen, more importantly, he treats her like a real human being. This man sees her for her abilities and that she has the power to be self dependent. She learned parts of herself, that she was able to work together with him like no one else could.  She learned parts of herself she was unable to do so if she kept obsessing about Aaron. All this love, care, mutual understanding and RESPECT these two shared. 

but...NAH FUCK THAT, right Yams?? Throw all this development away, all this bonding. Let’s make the main female lead even more yandere than she already was in the first season. Let her make out with his decapacitated head (like dude, this is also pure disrespect to Aaron’s dead body btw) and let her obsess even more about the guy who has treated her no better than a piece of toilet cloth 99 percent of the time. The guy who was never really appreciative in front of her for saving his ass billions of times, who always pushed her away, who yells at her and snaps at her whenever he can instead of reasoning and talking calmly with her in mature way. (EVEN PARODY YOUTUBE CHANNELS WHO DONT SHIP ANYTHING MAKE IT A TROPE WHERE AARON TELLS MIKASA HE HATES HER GUTS WHENEVER HE CAN) 

Then after all that, suddenly Yams tries to last minute persuade us Aaron’s always been head over heels for her???  He should have build their relationship better which he hasn’t even tried to do so... He must be thinking his fans are stupid for eating this from his hands.    

Like seriously??? What is this??? 

Isayama is just fully contradicting himself. It’s like someone tipped him off with a buttload of money for him to write Aaron like this to satisfy shipping needs and to cash in those extra money’s from it. Even if he tried to cater to Erem*ika, this is not how you write a loving and caring couple which people will root for. 

This next two panels just freaking infuriates me to the core of my soul. I can’t even describe how dissapointed I am with Mikasa. 

Why is she clutching that head so obsessively like that?  Why is she walking and turning her back away from her comrades? After everything they have done for her, after all they’ve been through?! After everything Armin has done? Standing up for Mikasa, beating up Aaron for hurting her. I feel like even Jean, Connie and Sasha have cared more for her in a healthy way.  Sure, Aaron cares for her romantically too apparently (What a twist Yams :)), but has he aided her to becoming a mentally healthier individual? Has he aided in her mental stability? The answer is a big fat NO!  All I see between these two after today’s raw Chapter’s are too Yandere obsessed individuals who have no clue on how to maintain a healthy relationship. 

Love should only go as far as the heart can endure and it seems like her character is not willing to be aware of that. Even Armin was able to let go of Aaron in those latest panels. Why does her entire character resolve around this guy??? I really do not understand. Her Ackerbond and her age is not an excuse for her to throw her life away like this. 

Shonen’s disgusting portrayal of women 

I’ve seen this countless of times in the many years I’ve watched anime. SasuS*ku from Naruto, Ichih*me from Bleach, Shinji and that oranged hair girl from Neon Evangelion.. Why do these women get decreased to simpletons with one single goal? And that is to obsess over a bland male lead who either treats them like trash or doesn’t notice them up until the last last chapter (LITERALLY WHAT YAMS HAS DONE). Some go even as far as the male leading wanting the kill the female love interest and yet the female lead is still in love with them???. It’s disgusting for him to write the MAIN female character this way. 

It’s dissapointing we believed in Isayama doing Mikasa’s character right. That she’s finally being able to let go of her codependency and to live for herself maybe live in Hizuru and find more about her roots???, but every single time she shows some improvement, it’s burried deep in the ground again by the Author. It almost seems like a lowkey kink of some of the male Mangaka’s to write about a girl obsessing over them no matter what. I see this so many times to the point that I truly stand behind it that some of them might have this fantasy. 

I wished he didn’t portray her last panels like this. Everyone else is living their lives while Mikasa is still grieving about him. I’m not saying she’s not allowed to grieve and everyone takes it at their own pace, but cmon... Show her living her life too. This is too much. Her being next to his grave and grieving him as her last panels just shoves it in our faces that YET AGAIN, BEING OBSESSED WITH AARON IS ALL HER CHARACTER STANDS FOR. 

I truly despise how Isayama handles her grieving, kissing his decapacitated head, carrying it around like some handbag, and her last panels being thissss.

The world leaving Paradis alone miraciously after all that??? 

It’s so weird and out of place with so many political feuds and disagreements between the world and Paradis, the entire Rumbling happening and we can see Mikasa just chilling outside in Paradis with no one bothering them. You can see the rings of the walls in the picture below.  I don’t know the exact reason behind as the manga is still in Korean, but from what I see, the story went the route of: throwing a happy ending without enough proper reason and  it was all fixed just like that in a snap! It doesn’t fit the entire narrative of attack on titan for things to be so peacful out of nowhere. When it comes to the narrative, how things work in that world, how hard it is to achieve peace, everything made somewhat sense up until chapter 138. 139 seems so so out of place...  It’s like I’m reading a chapter from a totally different manga. 

Aaron Yoghurt got defeated so easily/ Aaron’s character assassination

The build up on the first part of the rumbling was great, those kids carrying coins. You could feel humanity’s fear and Aaron’s hatred in those pages. As if he truly had a goal and he has turned away completely from his comrades and his closest friends with no return. The world seemed truly doomed, but he  got defeated just like that. He was in the nape all this time (because screw the warhammer power of hiding yourself elsewhere in his ginormous titan body). There is no master plan as we all expected, and in the end he just acts all yandere in the paths with Armin and that’s it... They massacared his entire character as well. Many fan theories created a better ending with his character. Him being reincarnated as Historia’s baby would be so much better. For him to still keep on seeking and to strive for power. It has always been his motive. It’s his personality from the start until chapter 138. Even if things are okay, to keep on going and to seek that adventure, but then.. He’s so weak and directionless suddenly.. It’s so weird... This is not Aaron at all???

Using Aaron for him this entire post, because I don’t want others to invade our tags... :)))

Historia’s baby 

The only panel we got from Historia’s child was this. Just a normal kid, normal life... Why did Isayama put so much effort in highlighting Historia’s pregnancy if it was nothing too spectacular anyway? It seemed he had major plans for this kid and for their development too??? It’s again, big plans, big developments, big relationship dynamic, but all  got thrown out of the window... 

Don’t read the next sentence if you are a minor :’) 

It’s like almost ejaculating, but stopping right before it and repeating that every single Arc.

My energy when writing about this chapter is the same as Nostalgia Critic and his hatred for atla the live action

In Conclusion...

I know us fans should not be deciding on how this story should end, because this is Isayama’s story after all, but I truly wished for him to wrap up things much more rounded. There are so many unanswered questions... Again, I think for the sake of being done with this manga, he rushed all of it. He’s become a millionaire from this story and now his pockets are jammed full, I guess he doesn’t need to put in any effort anymore, right? Perhaps a controversial opinion, but I really wished he cared for his fans a little bit more with this last chapter by giving some answers that make sense at least. It’s his fans who gave him this platform and the opportunity to tell his story and for him to at least give in a bit of effort especially in the last chapter is the least he can do. Rivamika being canon or not, he truly rushed it without thinking much about the entire story line. He expanded it so much, he didn’t know how to bind it all together.

Even after all this, I’ll still ship them in the headcanon type of way. I do give credit to Isayama for giving us a template for such a beautiful dynamic between Levi and Mikasa. He decides to waste it, but that doesn’t mean we have to.  I want to thank all the people with amazing writing skills, the ones who give us beautiful art like @carmenlee @phit chan @vialesana​ and many more. I want to remind all of you that we can create something beautiful of our own and we don’t neccesarily need canon lore for that. The art I’ve seen, the fanfictions I’ve read have touched me deeper than Isayama ever could at times.The Mikasa in our mind is appreciate of Levi, is mature, classy and has a strong will for herself. They spend their remaining days together peacefully. Keep writing, keep drawing, stay creative. 

I love you all so so much, I’ve only been publicly active since March, but thank you Rivamika fandom for giving me so much joy as a lurker these past 7 years <3

[antiloreolympus]

14 Anti LO Asks

1. To the one anon: good question - how is it that the mortals dont know who Persephone is / assume she is a minor goddess and therefore its okay to mess with her but the gods (or Olympians / underworld denizens) know exactly everything about her (despite her being there only every so often and only being 20ish) - enough to say shes "wearing her signature white color" during a murder trial.

Also the reason why Persephone is wearing white is because

A). RS wanted persephone to always be "dressed as a bride" (and have Hades dressed as a groom respectively) to show that their matching / is supposed to be a visual cue that their eventually gonna be together.

B). I believe this is RS way of saying that Persephone (despite murdering some mortals) is innocent because in purity culture White = innocence, virginity, youth etc. (Even though RS explicity ssid she wanted to go against purity culture morals shes very much leaning into them). 

2. why are Psyche’s eyes yellow even in her human form? Is she sick??

3. honestly? LO is just gossisp girl at this point, espect even GG (at least in the first season) bothered to saturze the rich and was calling out how wealth and power makes them corrupt assholes. meanwhile LO is just GG season 2 and on of being like no no, the poor people are the evil people and the rich people are the oppressed ones! all while also fawning over their  wealth and status and being way into grown men wanting to bang barely legal teens and claiming to be "feminist" somehow.

4. Tumblr is well-known for broken tag system. Check the post' tags before complaining that it's op's fault. How about you guys not tag greek mythology when posting about LO? LO is not one-shot or short fancomic. It's also definitely not considered actual greek mythology. LO is years long webcomic with huge fans. LO has its own tag. Tell your fellow fans to stop using the greek mythology tag.

5. I would argue nyx is the only woman with a unique in design in LO but thats only because she looks like a deformed chicken woman. why was my night mom disrespected this much 😭

6. So now that LO is back from break and I can finally read chapter 170 - Why oh Why do ALL the female characters Have to be defined by their male love interests??? (Or really just love interests in general).

I understand LO qualifies as the "romance" genre and there are certain stipulations or I guess themes or what have you that make it romance but for f*cks sake.

Psyche being worried about Eros loving the "fake" her I kinda get, but really? Thats your most pressing concern?? Hera is defined by her garbage marriage to Zeus - King of the gods (of which is why she is Queen of the gods). Hestia + Athena are now defined solely by their relationship to each other (not the TGOEM or their respective traits of being a goddess of the hearth + goddess of war, strategy etc etc).

Aphrodite is defined by giving Persephone "relationship" advice (e.g: telling her to curb stomp Minthe because "nymphs dont take things from gods" - doubly implying that people are things to own) And by her jealousy of Persephone in the first place because Hades made a comment about how he thought Persephone was prettier than her. And also because of her "house of debauchery" (Artemis'  words) - and relationship with Ares.

Persephone is defined both by Apollo raping her and by her fated future status as Queen of the underworld (so her relationship with Hades). Hell, even the minor characters such as nymphs are defined by this relationship status / standard. Minthe is defined by her mean spirited personality yes, but Also because of her abusive relationship with Hades prior to the introduction of Persephone. Psyche is defined by her relationship woes with Eros. Daphne is defined by her relationship with Thanatos (and because shes a flower nymph) but also mostly because she looks like Persephone.

Rhea is defined by her marriage / relationship to Kronos (lets ignore the whole "fertility goddess power" plot for a second). Even Aetna is defined by Haphestus creating her! Is there not a single character (especially female) is isnt defined by their romantic love interest???Sorry. Maybe I'm overthinking this, but thats definitely how ot comes off as of late, in regard to the latest chapters.

Okay, same anon as earlier - I take it back somewhat - we have Artemis and Hecate that are not defined by their romantic relationships - but rather their lack of one.

However the way they are shown - it still comes off as a standard - "Artemis is stingy / a stick in the mud" because shes not romantically involved and is "barbaric" (according to Hera). And Hecate is still somewhat defined by her being Hades' employee (and cheerleader for him and Persephone to be together).

So technically yes, we have at least 2 characters that are not defined by their romantic interests / relationships, but they are still held to the standard of their "un-ladylike / undesirable" because their not romantically involved.

(I guess I should count Demeter, but only because shes more defined by just being "Persephone's overbearing mom" )

7. i think whats also kinda weird about this trial is like?? persephone is obvs framed as not liking the attention (bc duh) but she didnt like the previous press either, she wanted to be private, but wouldnt being with hades force her to be in the spotlight that makes her uncomfortable? also the citizens of the underworld already dislike hades, why would they want a uncontrollable felon as their queen, even if she found innocent? idk the whole thing just makes the endgame less plausible, tbh.

8. love that rachel was able to find a random deity name to name her random nymph the greek word for "beans" meanwhile apparently cant google actual greek names for even one off characters? like andrew, ellen, george, alexis, damian, luke, phoebe, sophia, and so any other english names are also greek, but she cant even bother with that? what exactly is her "research" if she cant even bother to spend 30 seconds googling greek names? at this point LO seems determined to be as un-Greek as possible.

9. wait so everyone in LO went from having no idea who persephone was, to her only showing up on ONE magazine cover, to now being the most well known person with a signature color? all in the span of two weeks with no genuine public outings? how does that make sense? also white isnt even her signature color if 90%+ the female cast and even a lot of the men ((including ZEUS) all wear it too.

10. the fact the courthouse WASNT the areopagus, aka the place in greece where they say the first ever trial ever happened and where the court system was invented, is just another point of rachel talking out her ass about being "respectful" or "researched" on greece and their mythology. its literally one of the most famous mythology spots ever with some fantastic stories to it and she's just like "nah! boring rectangle will do!" like why even both with mythology then if its this devoid of it?

11. Anons are saying Hades in the FS chapter is leaning down and talking to Persy like a child. Say it aint true.

(I wanna see. I thought RS was finally giving Persy adult proportions). 😨

12. So wait, hold up. I kinda get where RS is coming from with the law school in the underworld (because Hades is supposed to be a kinda Judge, jury, executioner situation in the afterlife when it comes to mortals and their "punishments" and whatnot). However, is RS stating that the ONLY law school / courthouse exists in the underworld? If so, why? Why wouldn't Athena be there then. She's a goddess of strategy and justice (among other things).

Also is RS really implying that Hades owns not only the banks and underworld but the law too? She really wants Hades to be a Gary Sue along side her Mary Sue - Hades controls everything that matters and since its his realm and blah blah blah rules, Zeus, king of the gods cant do anything about it.

(Which is dumb. Because you would think that because Persephone committed the crime in the mortal realm / on, or near Olympus that therefore she would be brought back there to dole out justice under Zeus jurisdiction because she committed the crime in His Realm). 

13. FP Spoiler ahead:

Why on earth couldn't the reporters have Greek names? There is so much wrong and bad with this story, yet this irks me so much. It is Brenda all over again.

14. i dont really get the point of the trial plotline, tbh. even persephone says she should be punished and held accountable, but hades is framed in the right for trying to go against that and weasel her out of it. so?? plus zeus has legit reason to punish them? persephone is a danger to others, demeter and hermes both committed treason to cover it up, and hades was harboring a fugitive of the law and is now trying to force the system to let her go. how is zeus in the wrong for this?

[botwstoriesandsuch]

hey Kip! I’m sending asks into different writer’s askboxes, inquiring about cool themes/development facts/stuff the author wants to share about their personal favorite work of their own. What’s yours? :)

Ok so this ask is old and when I first got it I was like “dang I don’t really have a lot to talk about, what should I talk about I could those revalink headcanons the Kip Cut that turned into a working fic uhh hmm maybe I’ll just make something new to talk about real quick” and then I did and now there is a 12+ chapter Revalink fic in my drafts and I’m gonna talk about that now, whoopsie doopsie [click "j" to skip]

aHEM, OK so allow me to break out the primary school white board because yeah, I have a lot of thoughts and the oxford comma has not yet made it’s home into my brain. oh and spoilers for paraphrase. for both all of Chapter one and future events in later chapters, but it’s really nothing you couldn’t surmise from the AO3 tags

so I really wanted to tell the story of Revali and Link learning and struggling to love again after the less-than-fortunate events of Botw, but I wanted a...how you say...fresher, approach on the subject? Like I know we always say that fanfic writers writing the same tropes and stories time and time again is good because we eat that shit up--but at the same time I had asian parenting as was told never to half ass anything ever, no matter what. So now I'm gay and extra and have depression maybe and oh would you look at that @motherhyrule has dropped a beautiful revalink prompt right into my lap

Great so now that we have, that, I shall take you on the step by step process on how to make a :sparkles: story. So step one is to spend at least five to eleven business days for your white board to dismantle your genre and themes and work them around your character arcs. Luckily I have prepared one ahead of time

s*breaks out those laser pointers that uni professors use* So let's start with defining genre. As define because I HATE you, fuck you. I want you to suffer and writhe on the ground, motherfucker. How dare you think that I would give you nothing but pure predictable fluff, fuck you and yours

is the set of expectations that your audience has when consuming a piece of media

And the great thing about fanfiction is that unlike movies or book where the genres are more vague like, "oh it's a noir mystery genre. so there's a crime, maybe a murder, and a detective and a criminal." or "oh it's a teen romance. so there's some white people and a morally questionable six-pack 18 year old love interest that will be painted as desirable for some reason" BUT with fanfiction HALF of the work out the window, because as soon as you see those #revalink #aro sidon #zelpha #revali is an idiot and #found family tags you already know what's up.

Now what's so great about genre and expectation? Well the fun thing about it is that

I will use it to fucking break you.

... ... ...

<3 For example! <3

In Chapter 1: Holes, you already expect there to be revalink, you already expect them to be soulmates with the soulmarks and there's angst and yadayada ya. Revali and Link have to match because thatttss what this is all about, this is about them! This is about cute, little soulmarks and romantic words!

But whoooopsie doopsie [disney channel laugh track plays] they DON'T match anymore! Link's got a different mark! The number one rule of this entire genre has been broken whoooooooooooooooops. *ba dum tiss*

You might notice with a lot of my writing that I do this a lot, this whole..."oop but there's one little thing that's different." TebaSaki sick fic? Ok cool, but what if Teba burns an irreplaceable relic of the Rito champion to fight a wizzrobe first to characterize why his dumbass clicks with Saki. Mipha deciding to persue Link? Ok what if she chases after a dragon to externalize this conflict as she pierces it's flesh for a scale. Link fighting a Lynel? Ok but what if it's actually a sidlink angst fic in disguise and it's also world building on how Link deals with the bloodmoon that erases all of his efforts which is sort of similar to how his existence was erased from Hyrule 100 years ago mwaahahaha! Ok now that I say this outloud I think I just have a pattern of using fight scenes to externalize character growth. I like fight scenes...anyways.

I think another great thing about the realm of fanfiction is that with the tagging system, I can basically use a chekhov's gun sort of deal, without doing any writing. You know I'm gonna use that gun marked "soulmates" but you don't know when I'm gonna shoot it, and you SURE as hell don't know how.

And huzzah! One of the main points of conflict both drives the tension between Revali and Link, solidifies the unique genre and setting of this world, while also creating a new mystery that will carry over for the next few chapters.

Is Revali right in that Link's rebirth makes him destined for someone new now? What will Link do with the information that his soulmark has changed? Why did it change? Did Revali's change as well? How does anything fucking work right now?

And sure, you might be able to tell where things will end with them, but you sure as fuck will not know how because I HATE you. Fuck you. I want you to suffer and writhe on the ground, motherfucker. How dare you think that I would give you nothing but pure predictable fluff. I am not your goddamn fairy godmother, I will do as I fucking please. You will suffer as you fucking deserve, fuck you and your little tiny--

/j

Oh! But you might have noticed on my little planning whiteboard thing that there was a little T-Chart! For Revali and Link! That's because the next important thing besides plot (and in a lot of cases, including this one, it's argued to be even MORE important than plot) is

~CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT~

[to the tune of that history of the world video on youtube]

So yes, it's a little T-Chart outlining their character views in relation to the themes. And the great thing about themes is that they're not something you can necessarily predict in the same way you can with the genre and plot.

But now see, I'm very lazy so I'm just gonna plagiarize @hyrule-kingdom-updates thingy [that you should read btw] because they said my point quite clear enough

Now I don't really need to care about those points about bond and relationships and being understood, because I'm dealing with already established canon characters. I'm not some NERD who dabbles with entire casts of ocs who even cares about ocs not me that's for sure ahaahahaahahahahahaahahahahahAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *cries in my orphaned WTTU fic* AHAHAHA*sobs*DONT FUCKING LOOK AT ME THAT WAY I SWEAR--

/j I love ocs

But the points I do wanna focus on is the idea that characters provide new perspectives on the theme, and that characters growth can be tracked based on their wants, lies, and needs.

So see, themes can be predicted the same as genre/plot because while you can have the same fanfic plots and tropes, theme will always vary!

Sometimes it's a journey of selfworth with Revali! Sometimes it's an exploration of trauma with Link. Sometimes it's about how you deal with the vulnerabilities of love with Mipha. Sometimes there's straight up NOOOO theme, and people just be fucking, and kissing, and baking, and having a good time. And that is totally fine too!

But I'm not a fucking coward.

I'm gonna weave in themes with my plot, because I fucking can.

I'm not a weakling like you.

Do you hear me, 2019 Kip? Do you hear me Demmers? Do you hear me Quill? I'm coming for your ass. You think you're so great, but I'm coming for you. Rest assured that your graves will be as deep as your sculptured pride--

Heeeere is that T-Chart again, plus more!

yyyyyYou might notice that Revali and Link are quite parallel, to paraphrase. Ayoooo, see what I did there? *dabs* I'm a genius. Anywho

They both start off the same way: 100 years ago they were in love and happy. Basically the equivalent of childish naivety. For the first time in their lives, life is whimsical and charming, and they make each other happy. In fact, it's almost a flaw with how they perceive this happiness. But don't worry! It doesn't last long!

You know what happens.

I think the chart is pretty self explanatory. Revali builds walls fast enough to give a republican a wet dream. Meanwhile Link makes every aromantic in the chat groan with his doubled down sentiments in the idea that his chances of being truly happy again are gone.

Now, I can't exactly describe the full on process of the inbetweens, and where Revali and Link are gonna go from here, because...you have to read it for yourself! Heehee...but something I did think was fun was how these character views on the themes are revealed. Because you'll notice that, I never give exposition. Ever.

Ok well, let me rephrase that. I never give exposition scenes. I will never give you a big LOTR fancy wizard scene explaining the ins and outs of a character's question or the world's magic or whatever. I'm a very impatient Kip, and I value efficiency. Nonono, it's all about multi tasking, baby!

Chapter 1: Holes is divided into three parts.

Post 100 Years - Medoh (Establishes Ghost Rev/Bonk Head Link's view)

100 Years Ago - Flight Range (Establishes old Revalink views)

Post 100 years - Mark (Develops Ghost Rev/Bonk Head Link's view in contrast to who they once were)

I think the way that you structure flashbacks is incredible vital, as it's a very quick way to characterize people without having them say stuff like "I used to be like you, until I took an arrow to the knee" or whatever.

And with the main structure of the chapters and the fic as a whole is focus on their characters, that means I can hide whatever other stuff I want in those scenes, becuase you're too busy absorbing the fun character stuff to realizing I'm giving you boring exposition. Like for example:

Post 100 Years - Medoh and Mark

Foreshadowing for the end of the fic

Set up connection to Medoh with Revali

Link has defeated Windblight

Link has been visiting Revali every night for the past few days

Link has already met Kass and presumably Teba

Link doesn't have the Mastersword

Revali's Gale is still an ability that needs master and practice on Link's end

And that's just some of the stuff.

And see, the only reason I can efficiently give all of this information regarding character, and even exposition, is because of the theme. The themes make everything relevant, and everything circles and encompasses one another, so there's absolutely no wasted space. I mean don't even get me started on how it's gonna be to characterize the other characters around this

I don't wanna talk about the other characters too much either because that's spoilers, but you can probably take a gandar based on my notes.

And oh my god this is just on the theme of the faults that come with "soulmates" and "true love" and all that, and how even magical destined relationships still require work and effort, and that no one thing or person solves all your problems. And that's not even TOUCHING the shit on trauma and scars. I didn't think it was even possible for me to talk about botw without touching on that, ha. Ah well, I've been talking for too long.

Revalink has a lot o' writing potential so das pretty cool yeah, I am excite

[just-zenitsu]

Zenitsu should've had an arc where he slowly learns how to love himself with the help of his friends and realizes he's not weak and has worth and doesn't deserve pain and doesn't deserve to be treated like shit- I just want him to have some shred of confidence please please please please please ple-

ok so every time i had an ask like this ive always just said ‘but look at the bright side! what are hc and aus for! gotoge had problems,, etc etc’ and i feel like ive always just glossed u guys over and maybe even made it seem like these opinions dont matter so im gonna take the time to try and answer this a smidge seriously (under read more bc its long, also im not tagging bc tumblr might fuck up the formatting again rip) (also warning for manga spoilers)

(also disclaimer sdjfhksd i havent read the manga! so im gonna go off of other people’s claims about zenitsu having wasted potential. and to be fair ive read the few last chapters, or at least PARTS of them) 

im not new to having a favorite character whose more or less claimed to have had a lot of potential but losing it in canon bc of, for a lack of a more general term, ‘’bad writing’’. and im not saying kny has bad writing, i dont think im one to judge that JUST yet but for comparison yall should know that i have a fav character in another series that is written so badly that he has the personality of cardboard and was only given life thanks to fanon content. and i dont blame people when they say they dont like said character! its the same as zenitsu, only that this guy, this yellow idiot, actually has a much more solid grasp on how he acts/feels/does things! but more often than not, this linear perspective does damage to how deep his character actually goes, thus just making him the stereotypical ‘pervert’ in an anime. ive seen people say that he’s just the same as mineta!!! which is just. very sad for me

i understand why they’d think like that though, maybe there wouldve been a difference if kny became more popular b4 bnha, but who knows! anyways, back to zenitsu. now, i understand if people ever found his actions uncomfortable or annoying! but when people say that he’s just a crybaby and that he’s literally just dead weight that’s when i get,,, well, iffy. and this is kinda where the frustration comes, we see zenitsu overcoming these obstacles off screen, apparently it was even only just mentioned in a passing comment that zenitsu had stopped having to fall asleep to do missions and cried less when he was going on solo missions. these are the tidbits that i wish was shown more explicitly in canon, showcasing his growth and such. MAYBE it was touched upon once kaigaku came up, but thats another problem, literally kaigaku only showed up once in a flashback and then suddenly he’s a demon? sure a brief flashback that showed him being in gyomei’s orphanage wouldve been enough to put some light, but i think there was still some things that wasnt touched upon when we discuss how kaigaku was portrayed in canon. i think he’s even MORE misunderstood compared to zenitsu. they have (arguably) been in the same situation in their childhood, have drastically different personalities and dealt with it in their own way, but in the end i think he was just used so that zenitsu had a big bad he had to defeat. i think there wouldve been more impact if we were shown thunder fam interacting more, imagine how cool that wouldve been, ESPECIALLY if kaigaku just wasnt thrown into the manga and was given a chance to interact with kamaboko before hand. just, a lot to think about.

and now we have what happened in the last few chapters, w tanjirou becoming a demon and after all that zenitsu just says something along the lines of ‘ill make u pay for hurting me and my future wife (nezuko)’ which sucks to a degree. but count the fact that gotoge was inching towards zennezu, as i mentioned in a previous post, he was worried about nezuko getting hurt by tanjirou. im also a bit disappointed that he didnt really do much in terms of, well, caring for tanjirou, but one GOOD thing that i really liked happening was in the previous chapters bEFORE tan got turned to a demon, the part w him assuring inosuke that he can still hear tanjirou’s heartbeat, and then consecutively screaming at tanjirou that he had to stay alive, he went as far to say that he hears nezuko’s human heartbeat and that he has a family to return to, which was, surprise surprise, apparently somewhat a LIE! i cant confirm this unfortunately since ive long since lost the explanation but someone said that zenitsu wasnt actually able to hear nezuko’s heartbeat then, meaning he lied for tanjirou’s sake bc he knew that if he’d pull through something, he’d pull through it for nezuko. (there’s also that part where zenitsu fought hard to keep this family alive since well, he doesnt have one to return to, which is just. ouch) another thing i liked about this part is that he wasnt!!! crying!!!, but both inosuke and tanjirou were and dont u just love the irony. dont u just love it when zenitsu, resident crybaby of the demon slayer corps, is the one who shouts at the both of his friends, who are usually the ones pushing him, yelling at him to stop sniveling and fight, to raise their chins up and to not give up? i think these few moments are JUST ABSOLUTELY TASTY. 

but. unfortunately, they are glossed over once we have what happened in chapter 203.

tl/dr; zenitsu’s character is something much more than a crybaby who’s a pervert and annoying. these points overshadow the fact that he’s a kind person, who was willing to protect nezuko despite knowing she was a demon just BECAUSE he trusted tanjirou that much and that he had a kind sound! he’s willingly THROWN HANDS when someone talked bad about kaigaku, a person he ADMITTED HE HATES, because he respects them as a person! zenitsu is much more than a crybaby who’s a pervert and annoying. if only canon were able to explain much more clearly than these few tidbits that we were given.

//im crying at the club im so sorry this is so long oh god oh fuck. anyways ive been disappointed time and time again and ive long since really stopped looking forward to the best to my fav characters and ive been p negative in previous fandoms so its why i avoided complaining like this in this blog but yeah kjfhkjsdf thank u for reading,,, 

[mousehole5000]

tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

[sargentr]

my fave drarry fics of all time, part one

so, after discovering i’ve officially been reading drarry fanfic for 4 years now, i decided to show my (quite big) list of favorite drarry fics. there are 46 in total, but i’ve listed 10 down below. the first three are my absolute favorites but the rest are equally as good

most of my notes are fresh from when i wrote them post-reading. i’ve changed some, seeming less like a crazy unstable bitch, but fuck these were all emotional as fuck. enjoy

ps: i dont really know how to tag people i dont follow. i cant try and tag the authors later. soz!!

pps: most of these i read when i was really into a bottom!draco phase, so most of them contain that, some are switch tho (as it should be, yikes past me)

1. Everything That Happen is From Now On / ~43K 

After surviving a brutal assault, Draco tries to navigate the tumultuous waters of his mind, and embrace a bit of love and trust in his life. After all, the smallest steps forward can begin to heal the most fractured of souls

okay so before i get in to how beautiful this story is, i wanna say that it does touch on rape quite explicitly. i cried like an idiot reading the entire thing, because draco’s pain is navigated in the most beautiful and realistic way. it touches on a subject very risky for me, very personal, and i still can’t think of a better drarry story. draco’s very draco about it all, and harry is very harry about it all. it’s just perfect, and messy, and tender, and sad. i’ve reread it more than any other fic, and it doesn’t disappoint. 

2. Pocket Full of Starlight / ~46K

When Scorpius Malfoy and Jamie Potter meet at Quidditch camp, they take an instant dislike to each other. Then they discover their lives are more connected than they could possibly imagine.

ah yes. the magic of kid fics. the TASTE

parent trap au. i read this one recently, like 3 months back, and absolutely fell in love with everything about it, partially because the parent trap is legit one of my top 10 favorite movies of all time. its just. the essence, the IDEA, is soooo mf beautiful. i cant get enough of reading when harry or draco finally meet the other twin, or how they cant stop loving each other even after 11 years. my heart clenched throughout the whole thing. 

3. Temptations on the Warfront / ~180K

Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter. Warnings for swearing, sexual content, and dark themes. 

this was the first drarry fic ive ever read, and before this mf i HATEDDD this pairing. so you can imagine how much it took to convince me otherwise, bc i was 100% scorbus before this.

to be fair, horcrux hunting with draco involved is, possibly, my favorite trope ever. its unique. theres tension, both sexual and life threatening. in some ways it romanticizes the war, but fuck it it aint a real war. 

slowest of burns. amazing. life changing. long as hell. nothing else to be said except read it right now i demand it.

4. Clouding the Senses / ~58K

As everyone returns to Hogwarts for a final eighth year, some people are coping better with the aftermath of the war than others. After encountering a very drunk Draco Malfoy one night, Harry realises that maybe those that lost loved ones aren’t the only ones trying to escape the war. Blaise Zabini seems to think Harry can help Malfoy, that the Slytherin might actually listen to him. Harry is not so sure. Dependence is a tricky thing, and one addiction can quickly shift to another.

everyone that reads drarry loves 8th year fics, but this ones just kinda different from all those normal (yet entertaining) ones. draco’s an alcoholic in this, and one night harry tries to help him and whoops, one thing leads to the other and they start having casual sex. its really, really amazing how both draco and harry navigate the addiction, i really cant say it has any flaws. 

i know the author got a lot of hate on their fics and thats why they took them down, but they’re truly one of the best drarry authors out there. i’ve reread this a couple of times, and the tenderness, the love and confusion is all very on character. a+

5. Restraint / ~153K

Someone casts the Imperius curse on Draco Malfoy, and whatever the instructions may be, Harry finds himself an unwilling target. The encounter leaves him torn between pleasure and revulsion. As they fight in the aftermath, a tense game begins. Harry fights to convince Malfoy, and himself, that he was not affected by that initial encounter, or any of those following it.

Faced with a series of escalating encounters, Harry must come to terms with desiring things he never thought he could, things he wishes he didn’t respond to. They each use signs of arousal as weapons against each other in a mad struggle to finally shame the other into backing down for good. 

But it’s only after the game is over that Harry starts to understand.

this is by the same author of clouding the senses, and i read this just this week. at first, it’s shocking, because it plays around with consent in a very unsettling way. when communication comes in, and its starts getting healthier, you can really understand where the author found the idea of playing with consent. it is, in my opinion, 100% characteristic of how they would behave post-war, with that grief and confusion. it’s also dom/sub in some parts, and that’s mf hot. 

it also has my favorite tropes in it, but it’s a spoiler to say which one. i’ll probably mention the trope in the list along with a bunch others, but when u finish reading you’ll know which one ;)

6. Humbug / ~30K

Draco has been taking his casual relationship with Harry for granted. Visits from four key ghosts the night before Christmas just might shake up his priorities in life.

(felt like it was valid to just paste what i wrote in my notes app after reading this)

(FUCKKKKKK HOW TO EVEN START?!!!?? just a fucking bonus, draco is THE best bottom o ever exist i love my bottom son so much. this story isnt only amazing it’s excruciatingly painful to read, harry and draco have been sleeping together but harry is completely in love with him. draco doesnt see how much harry cares for him or how much hes hurting harry by treating their fling like its just that, a FLING. with that, draco is haunted by three ghosts. one of the past, the present and the future, AND THEY SET THAT IDIOT STRAIGHTTTT 1800000/10. the gays DO KEEP MF WINNING!!!

7. in your arms, rests my world / ~24K

Harry presses his mouth to Malfoy's forehead; he wants to tell him that he’ll never leave, that he wouldn’t dream of it.

“You make me feel safe, Potter” Malfoy whispers. “You keep me safe.”

the friends with benefits trope doesnt ever disappoint, top 5 tropes fr, especially if its also 8th year. harry and draco get into their little thing, but of course nothing ever is simple between them. by the preview, you can clearly see how much draco likes harry (also another 10/10 trope, the ‘i’ve been in love with harry potter since i was 11′ one). my only tiny issue with this is that harry fucks it up just a tad, but it of course adds up to the drama of it all, which i absolutely love.

noting it also touches on non-con/rape and, and all in all, is extremely angsty. one i was tense from beginning to end. but i am gonna say it ends amazingly and v happily.

8. Playing the Hero / ~29K

Nobody kissed me like Harry did. He kissed like he flew; he kissed like he duelled - with his whole being, not caring about anything else. I had never felt as vulnerable as I did when he kissed me, seizing all and any control I had over myself. But when Harry kissed me, I felt free...

so the thing about angst is that it ignites that mf feeling side u that even tho it hurts you cannot get enough of. this fic was EVERYTHINGGG. it made cry and laugh and smile. also another trope i absolutely adore is them breaking up and not being 100% ok with that, bc ding ding!! YALL STILL LOVE EACH OTHER!! 

i cant describe how i felt, honestly. i would just paste my notes (i wont bc spoilers) but it looks like i went thru sum shit. deadass

9. fine i’ll hold my breath / till i forget it’s complicated  / ~ 15K with the two parts

Harry and Draco become friends with benefits, and Harry thinks it's more complicated than it actually is.

u know, fluff is a drug. i dont know if its beucase 90% of drarry fics are about angsty get-togethers, but i had butterflies in my stomach when i read this. its adorable. draco is so clearly in love, he jusT SMILES A LOT I CANTTT. 

its cute. i love it to death. have some fluff before starting your day.

10. Un Noël très parisien / ~14K

When Draco crossed paths with Auror Potter at a political function in Paris, he was not expecting their former animosity to change into something rather more intriguing. But he could be certain their casual flirtation would not last more than the night, couldn't he?

look. i know i named a lot of my favorite tropes here, but i cant end this without mentioning how much single dad draco affects me. i love scorpius and how much he changes draco in every fic he appears. i love parent draco and i shant be silent about it (especially when scorpius is legit just a year old in this. i died)

as it states, harry and draco have a one night stand but draco thinks thats it, that it was all he was ever gonna have. he’s wrong of course, and the path it takes, with both scorpius and harry there, just melted my mf heart.

well kids that’s all i have for now. imma work on a part two with 10 other fics i really love!1

[q-u-a-c-k]

rant that you can just skip over 😂 it's just detailed intrusive thoughts. and I'm continuing to rant about literally everything that goes through my brain so I am here writing this and not acting on thoughts or being stupid.

okay so this is a note from after I have written all that. and basically it's complaining and ranting about everything and hyperfixating on space and science in the end. in the middle I talk about my fears of love 😂 potentially triggering stuff? it's all nonsense you really dont have to read it. it was just to keep myself from doing something I shouldn't. so if you could be triggered by literally anything maybe dont? idk. I cant stop you but it's probably annoying and not interesting. if anyone does read it though let me know if I need to tag it anything.

So my brain has now decided that because there is no way I am sleeping tonight unless it's exhaustion, I get intrusive thoughts. fun! so rn it has been fixated on the fact that because I am closest to the outside. not hall door. that I could easily sneak out. which is very much not good idea, because 1) I dont live in this area, 2) it's still cold as fuck outside at night, 3) I would literally fucking get lost or caught immediately. So yeah :) I dont even know what I would do if I did go and I don't want to because I have an idea of what brain would say and that's a big no. it's especially big no because I'm too comfortable with the idea of it but I'm not allowed to. and I guess now it's kinda good because brain is thinking about how I miss my cat. I just wanna see my baby and be in my safe place with the people I'm actually comfortable with (cat and phone with online friends) like guys he's so fuckung adorable and what if he doesnt know why I'm not there right now. usually he sleeps in my room at night. so what if he's in my room waiting for me and I cant go see him. you're damn right that I'm crying about this. i just want my baby because he is my baby and an indicator of a safe place.

also I am so incredibly fucking uncomfortable. like I cannot sleep because 1) in a place I do not know 2) there are people (family) in the room that I am not comfortable letting my guard down around 3) there's so much noise from snoring (and from one sleep talking) 4) I am on the couch because when we go places I'm always the one who has to and it's a shitty pull out bed couch. it makes way too much noise that I have been in an uncomfortable position for over 3 hours because I dint want to disturb anyone else. and I can very easily feel like of the metal bars under the middle of my back 5) I am very cold. I forgot a blanket and I didnt get one because the room only gave us one extra one (I dont think we're supposed to have an extra person) ad my sister got it even though I'm the one by the outsid,door, window, and air conditioner which wont turn off. I at least have my flannel though to cover my legs 6) my head hurts so bad because it's the kind of headache that hurts to have eyes open, breath, or move around in general 7) my stomach hurts so bad because I had to eat because apparently people get hungry and are supposed to eat along with anxiety from literally all of this 8) I have not gotten to be alone for more than 10 minutes since the middle of Wednesday whereas usually I spend almsot all of my time alone (with cat and phone with online friends) in my safe place. 9) I have not stopped crying (not really like crying crying but like there has been tears or water from my eyes because for some reason they burn and some because of anxiety or missing cat. 10) I keep thinking that at any moment I close my eyes someone is going to break into the room or one of my family members are gonna do something (I literally dont know what, that's intrusive thoughts talking but I have previously freaked out because I thought they were gonna aliven't me for no reason) 11) When I'm somewhere I'm not used to I get really bad muscle cramps in my arms and legs and I am not having fun with that.

sorry that was a shit ton of complaining that nobody should have read or give a shit about. so sorry if anyone actually read that?

also Allison, if you actually do read this (istg you really dont have to. like I said this is just my train of thoughts written to prevent me from doing anything. I am not watching wandavision until later today 😂 and I am staying off the discord server I joined becuas of potential spoilers.

anyways continuation of rants and complaints. I really want to put the phone down and attempt to sleep even though I know I'm not gonna be able to and for that reason I have to write here because I do not trust myself with my brain being like this rn. but I wanna put phone down so bad because my eyes hurt and my head hurts from having eyes open.

and I really wanna just get my earbuds out and have controlled noise and potentially fall asleep but that would take noise louder than them to drown them out but any noise already is hurting my head and earbuds sound really uncomfortable right now.

also I'm starting to get really cold again because the flannel was working for a little but I think that was because I had to move a little bit to get it out and on my legs and I haven't been moving.

also my sister (sleep.talker) has been just making noises and mumbling all night except just now she went "eww" and rolled over and continued snoring and sleeping. so that's fun. totally didnt scare me.

oh my God it's fuckung almost 3:30 I just wanna sleep. at this rate I dont care in what way it happens, but I want sleep in the next 10 minutes so I cannot be aware of how uncomfortable or in pain I am.

my back (which usually already has back pain) connot stand to lay on the bar in this position anymore so I have to move but it's so loud and I dont wanna wake anyone up or move into a worse position but feel bad for moving.

I have now moved and I dont THINK I woken anyone up. back is better but head hurts so much more now because of movement and I am now laying on my knee which I have a lot of problems with and am not having a fun time.

idk what to talk about. I want sleep or to at least put phone down but like I said multiple times I do not trust my brain rn so I have to keep writing stuff. and I dont want to just keep complaining but idk what to talk about and complaining is easiest rn because I was out in an uncomfortable situation by coming with them and I didnt want to in the first place but would not be able to stay home.

I am now gonna talk about sleep and my thoughts about it. I like being asleep but I also dont. I like being not awake but most of the time do not like the dreams I have. but sleep itself is such an interesting concept. like the body forces itself to shut down and put you unconscious to like rest itself or repair before continuing to function. and it's like (supposed to be) on a specific or close to schedule. like youre supoosed to have a schedule for when you're unconscious. and this is completely normal. a part of our society is actually shaped around this too? like at certain times around the world it gets all dark and the world goes quiet for a while. idk I just think it's really interesting. maybe it's not idk lmao.

and now brain wants to talk about how and why I am afraid to love. :). brain is afraid to love because that means I have to be vulnerable to someone and that's just so terrifying to do, especially being someone who is different than a lot of the heteronormative society. like I absolutely love my friends. and once I'm comfortable around them, I'm gonna tell them that I love them as much as I can (but also dont want to make them uncomfortable). because if I finally feel comfortable enough around you to be vulnerable and accept that I love you despite brain's overwhelming urge to say I don't and be invulnerable and safe, I'm gonna tell you that as much as I can that I love you. because it literally happens so little in my life that I actually really trust someone. so if I tell you I love you I mean it (and it tells you I trust you). like seriously, I barely even say it to my mom because I'm so on guard and trying to watch my back around her. and I dont think I say it to the rest of my family. unless it's my grandparents I'm gonna tell them that because I think I do just in a different way of your my grandparent and you're family. and I occasionally say it to my irl best friend because there's still a lot I'm on guard about because I haven't told her a lot of things so we're not as close as you'd think. but if you're reading this I have probably told you i love you. and i know Allison i tell you as much as i can because I think yyou'rethe absolute top person that I trust and love, so i try to tell you a lot. because I love you!! you're like my entire found family 😂

but now we're gonna talk about reasons why I'm terrified to be in love romantically. Because I dont think i have actually liked someone romantically or really ever be romantically interested in anyone. I have thought about it because I felt like I had to tell myself I was ( I was not). like i thought I had a crush on someone once but I think it was because I was unable to be their friend at the time that I wanted to be their friend even more. and because I never really got to pick my friends I didnt know what it was like to actually want to be friends with someone. but thinking about someone romantically I just cant really do. because I don't want to get into a romantic relationship if I don't know if I'm gonna like them romantically at all. do people like people romantically when they first go out with someone? or do they just say I kinda like this person let's try it out? because that just doesnt make sense to me and idk. and it could very well be that I'm just to young to know yet. because I still dont even know what I would want from a romantic relationship. like... Idk what there is for me to want or what's different to loving your friends besides calling them something else? and the whole having to trust that this person likes you in a specific way that you might like them before you take it far enough and get hurt because they just don't feel the same? or you're the one that's not really sure and potentially hurt someone else? I know people say it's just a risk you're gonna have to take but I dont want to take a risk like that. I dont mind being hurt from it myself but in terrified at the thought that I could potentially hurt someone because I just dint feel a certain way. and I still dont know what the difference is between friend love or romantic love to be able to judge or risk that? like seriously what is different? because I mean, maybe affection like have someone to hug or cuddle? but you could do that with friends and it should be a normal thing to have with your friends. but ig this still is a fucked up society that thinks everything has to be more than what it really is. and it just leaves people touch starved because of it. idk. maybe one day I'll figure it out, but how it's just Greek and foreign to me. idfk.

well that was fun. now it's 4 and I need something else to talk about because even if I do potentially fall alseep soon, I do not want those to be my last thoughts and possibly have dream about it (dreams for me are typically not good).

I think I see the moon. it's either a moon or a parking lot light. and I know the moon is either full or very close to full (I'm pretty sure it's just very. close) but I wish all of those lights outside were off and possibly have a new moon so I could see the stars. I love the stars so much. i love the moon, too, but right now it's very bright. but I wish I was more into astronomy and knew more about it. because that's also something that's very interesting to me is space and the stars. I wanna be someone who knows about all of the constellations. but I have a horrible memory and absolutely would not be able to remember 88 different stories. although I'd want to. even though most of them or a bunch are just Zeus being a dick. but more to the science side of the stars is so interesting to me that they're soooooo far away. like they're literally incomprehensibly far away. like I cannot comprehend how big a football field is without see one, I'm agine being able to comprehend the distance of light years? like I know we know how far it is but I'm pretty sure human minds cannot comprehend how far that ACTUALLY is. even if we know it's a LOT. and isnt it cool how we're able to know there are other planets outside of the solar system? I believe it's 4 different planets that we know of that are MORE inhabitable than earth. like better to live on. and they have either older or stronger stars that wouldn't die out as fast as our sun. although there comes the debate of if we should be able to go to them. it's a very debatable question, but I think overall the answer would be no. because humans have fucked up an entire planet, why should we be allowed to do it to another? like it realize it's literally a percent of humans that fucked it up for the rest of the planet, but humans have an inner need to have power over everyone else and other things and would stop at nothing to get what they want. humans could so easily become corrupt and destroy other planets too. it's kind of a fucked up thing to say, but I feel like maybe humans should die out with our planet. like of course it's not fair to the ones who haven't had the chance to live a life yet. but it was never fair to the other creatures humans killed for their own needs. like we have caused extinction several times. karma will get you back in the end ig. and it would be cool to know but obviously we wouldnt be able to know, if a species even smarter than humans evolved and kept the peace on earth, even as the ruling species? ruling sounds wrong but idk what else to call it. whatever we are above everything else is what they would be. but it would be so amazing to know what smarter beings are alive or could eventually live. like that's so fucking cool.

anyways I should probably try to sleep or put phone down because now brian doesnt have time to let me do anything I shouldnt. it's 4:30 😂 someone is probably gonna wake up soon because idk.