#i dont know if we will ever be ok.
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There is nothing my heart craves more at this mentally draining time than genuine happiness. Please. I will take anything.
#feb 2024#been spending a lot of time in the hospital with my grandmother. it looks like thse are her final days.#shes lost her ability to speak. not sure if its the alzheimer or covid and it hindering her since she is barely breathing.#not to mention the random gunshots and explosions you'd hear whenever you're in there because of the clashes#im barely making sense but my brain isnt braining#imagine gunshots and explosions being so frequent in your area that you could her one coming from the children's ward#and the only thing you could think is. oh the iof are back? where is my brother? where is my father? i hope they are safe#imagine smelling tear-gas in a ward fulp of elderly who are suffering with covid.#will this ever get better???#im not losing hope but i sure am losing faith in humanity. this is nothing compared to gaza#i saw a video where the stray animals are feeding of the corpses. could you imagine this being your loved one? your child or parent?#seeing people recognising the bodies of there friends by a piece of cloth. because thats the only thing left of them.#im not ok.#i dont know if we will ever be ok.#this has been a tough time and it seems like kts only gonna get worse.#vent
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(pre-calam) filling the compendium :-)
+ closeup and the aftermath
#i am PRAYING that this posts okay and nothing gets squished or looks ugly. but if it is youcant tell me because ill cry#okay. anyways.#zelink#zelda#link#loz#botw#totk#link botw#zelda botw#loz fanart#for some reason trying to format this became a sisyphean ass task so now i just want to post it and go lie down or something#“why use warm colours if theyre on satori mountain” idk.... i liked how they looked :)#ok what else. ummm. so we KNOW zelda filled the compendium like she was running the navy right#its really funny because i dont even think its ever mentioned other than like. maybeeee one throwaway line from purah?#but there was a fandom osmosis moment bcus everyone Knew she'd be on top of it. and its true. she would be.#my art
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was talking to my brother the other day after i rewatched dark phoenix and he was like 'why is everyone so mean to charles in this movie?? were they always this mean to him ?? is it cause he's bald now- he lost his pretty privilege??' and i fear i havent recovered
#xmen#xmen movies#dark phoenix#charles xavier#professor x#snap chats#LIKE HE'S RIGHT 1000% I JUST DIDN'T EXPECT HIM TO SAY IT VLERKVJAKLJ#ANOTHER banger of a quote from my brother chat i screamed when he said that#adopting that into my belief system i fear#like really thinking on it they really did only start being especially rude after apocalypse im crying#dont quote me on that i have to rewatch apocalypse but as far as im aware. yeah 😭😭#and its SUCH a travesty cause i love how mcavoy looked in DP SO much he looks so good bald#like please if we were going to wrap up this era of xmen films why did we have to rerun DP#can we try again. please. i need him bald one more time in a movie i dont have to argue with myself i like#see DP wasnt the worst thing ever. probably. like scott got to do things again ..... and kurt .......#and the paris proposal. never forget that.#ALSO THE FUCKIN. 'no one cares charles' BIT ???? 97 ref'd that directly i know they did and i cheered#listen if they can ref the 'black leather suits' from the xmen movies i can believe they called back to that too <- delusional#anyway when james said thats the meanest thing erik could say/do to charles .... he was cooking ....#'thats the type of thing your wife/husband says' he was so right .... we know james never misses with the cherik takes tho#ok bye i have obligations that i need to complete so i can draw my favorite cue ball
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my favorite coming-of-age teen sitcom
#soup art#professor layton#hershel layton#randall ascot#angela ledore#all of these were drawn out before i crunched out chapter 6 at like. 3am. pained smile.#what if they were all friends. and all happy . what if they were buddies . and everything was ok. you ever consider that?#ive been told nothing else about the road ahead aside from 'it gets worse before it gets better'. so im absolutely jazzed lads#i dont even know how it COULD get worse. but we ball ig !!!!!!!!!!#ok enough rambling . shoutout to the last doodle for teaching me how to properly paint again#had a LOT of fun rendering that background :]
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a little family
#buddy daddies#my art#doodles#sometimes a family is an two misfit assassins and the daughter of the guy you offed and thats a okay#but lets not talk about that#we love healing in this house and how do you heal if not after suffering#reis journey through depression and kazukis journey through grief#what 1 little girl does to a man#its 5 am all i can offer are doodles but i love them very much#i know we do reasonably get to call them cowards for not making it gay (esp at the end bc come on)#but i do love whatever relationship they have going becuase theyre just. Thats marriage babe....#theyre not going to be doing any dating with that committment that is the most domestic ass setting ive ever seen#everyone and their mother assumes theyre married/dating and doesnt even question it because theres NO QUESTION T O ASK#only the people involved apparently dont know theyre married#ok nvm they were cowards for not making it gay. but again. theyre clearly married your honor. theyre just a little stupid
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MAY I HUMBLY REQUEST MORE RENDOG.... I really love your design for him <3
Dude I'm so sorry I drew Tango instead idk what happened
Surprise shiny duo!!! :)
#for real though I hope you dont mind anon!!! I really wanna draw more Rendog but also Ive been wanting to draw him in silly pink clothing#ever since I drew him for the first time#rendog#renthedog#tango tek#tangotek#trafficblr#secret life#secret life fanart#Ren is so sweet and silly I love him so dearly#red winter and bloodshed and stuff like ok whatever you say little guy#You see a sign warning you of a mean violent guard dog and the dog is just Ren asking if he may bite you. “is that alright if I bite you.”#How do Tango's clothes fit on him? Please do not ask me that. We both know Tango's not gonna be able to wear those clothes again though#I will draw more Rendog for sure!!!#tubby art
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being in art school and having basically 0 knowledge about christianity whatsoever is so funny at this point i think you could tell me literally anything was an allegory for jesus and i'd just believe you
#my ass has been to church like twice in my entire life so my peers are like 'this is a biblical allegory' and im like yeah ok sure#makes art history class very annoying tho because everyone just assumes you can look at a stained glass window and know who all the guys ar#also sometimes people will be like this image depicts the story of david or peter or some random other biblical name#and then just. not elaborate. because apparently we all know the stories of every biblical guy who ever existed.#who is peter and why is he in the church window. please#and i dont even have an EXCUSE bc like both ethnically and like in basic practice i am christian. i celebrate christmas or whatever#my parents both just fucking hated church so much as children they were like nah were not doing that#and now i have a deficiency in Identifying White Men In Paintings apparently.#sigh. sorry just got a 5 out of 13 on an art history quiz feeling GREAT
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Baby's first kiss(ing attempt)
#girl whos never had a crush before vs girl who doesnt know she can be upfront about her feelings#rynes like 'wow gaias so cool shes so great i kinda wanna kiss her but thats normal right haha'#and gaias like 'rynes great but shes weird so i cant just say i want to kiss her she probably doesnt even like me that way'#i dont think ryne would ever realoze she has a crush on her own i mean she hasnt had friends her age before#u think she knows the difference between loving ur friends platonically and romantically#at most she realizes that oh my feelings for gaia are different than for the twins/wol/lyna but shed probably just be like#well ofc its different we met in a different way and i cant hang out with the twins/wol/lyna this much so its normal#and gaias just a massive tsundere whos actually a coward with her feelings#like of COURSE she cant just tell ryne she likes her thats WEIRD and shes Normal ok shes so Normal#(she isnt but next to ryne she might feel like she is)#anyway i think wol should give them relationship advice bc SOMEONE needs to teach these girls how crushes work#ryne waters#gaia#rynegaia#gaiaryne#urithan#thanuri#only mentioned but still#final fantasy#final fantasy 14#final fantasy xiv#ff14#ffxiv#art#my art#xanders art#digital art#fan art
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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nickel and balloon would be so much more interesting if people explored the way nickel became everything awful that balloon used to be but so much worse ironically all in the name of "protecting" everyone from that history repeating. and not softboy tsundere yaoi or whatever is going on in those tags rn
#meeple.txt#inanimate insanity#iii they could so easily make me hate you.#nickloon arc was the worst thing to ever come out of iii#unnecessarily long and stupid and hilariously poorly written#i actually feel insane seeing how many people just accept it at face value as The Canon#i know it Is canon but i dont care. Heart❤️#we need to bring back the fandom energy of collectively rejecting the shitty writing#nickloon arc did not happen its ok. take my hand#in my heart nickel digs himself a deeper hole of denying he did any wrong and everyone at most tolerates him#fits his character built up by s2 so much better and parallels other characters too#somewhere deep in his head i feel like he knows hes wrong. but by god it should not have been that easy to ''fix'' him#hes going to deny it until it kills him bc that means facing any regret or deeper feelings he doesnt wanna deal with#and that means admitting he made mistakes which is a huge blow to his ego#and his Cool Tough Leader personality#hes not gonna give that up so easily#and i dont think its in character for him to change within the timeframe of the show tbh . at least with the time they have left now#thats like a post canon Maybe to me#the only way ill accept it really
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hmm. if and when we get phillip featuring more heavily in a future knives out movie I really hope there's a fully realised version of the moment in glass onion where a woman is coming onto blanc and he's doing the whole trying to be a gentleman about this, ohh I'm flattered but.... and then phillip "get straight to the point" nolastname steps in and says something like "I'm afraid he's otherwise engaged", and then blanc introduces phillip as his Partner and THEN they have to do the whole runaround where everyone thinks "engaged" means too busy with work and "partner" means investigative partner but what they actually mean is gay partner and engaged as in Engaged to be Married. the perfect reversal of the many generations of people mistaking platonic partnerships as gay couples For Funnies in this kind of genre. the anti-bbc sherlock, if you will
#i just think it would be hilarious and also we deserve it. everyone keep a close eye on hugh grant in the next year or so guys#i am also ok if we dont see phillip ever again or only very briefly or get mentions of him cuz i know the focus is not blanc himself#but i do think this concept has potential. maybe they are genuinely on holiday together and then get dragged into a murder mystery. yknow#theres so many ways they could do it#knives out#glass onion
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minedai week day 2: vacation/beach
Prompts
#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#snap sketches#yakuza series#yakuza 3#daigo dojima#yoshitaka mine#minedai#technically the prompt isboth but sue me anyways#we know my ass too tired to do anything when i resort to drawin em marshmallow style#yk im tired as balls when i dont seize the opportunity for thirst trap mine posting.... woAgh....#theyre silly..... also i did give mine a 'sniper rifle' because the only time he ever fuckin shot and hit anyone was with a rifle#he cant aim otherwise but if you slap a big fat scope on his eyeball he should do fine#ok bye i think i wanna doodle something else.....
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boggles my mind that inhumans are taught english in school but not tilan sign language. the only way their 20+ years ruling monarch can communicate. and one of their two native languages. black bolt what are you DOING over there
#like. its not even an elective??#ok granted i dont know about the specifics because marvel wont give me my extensive inhumans lore and culture book#but come onnnn you cant convince me not ONE person has ever been like 'hey blackagar. shouldnt we like teach that. maybe.'#theres not ONE other deaf/HoH/mute inhuman that signs??#you GOTTA at least put the alphabet in a book somewhere. wwait does he even Have like an alphabet#he has to. surely. obviously he nevers fingerspells in the comics but he has to have an alphabet#I WANT MY EXTENSIVE INHUMANS LORE AND CULTURE BOOK!!! AND I WANT TO KNOW TILAN SIGN LANGUAGE!!!!!!#blackagar boltagon#inhumans
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ok but look at our cute wedding
#jjk261? i dont know her :/#this is my canon now bye gege#satoru getting isekai'd to stardew after dying#at first he hates it bc its boring af compared to the life hes used to#but then we meet and fall in love and live happily ever after#and suddenly a seemingly mundane normal life isnt so bad when you get to spend it with the person you love with all ur heart 🤧#......also i modded it so he follows me and we go on adventures#he beats up the monsters in the mine while his wife collects shiny rocks ajdnskdnskdjsksjkaka#ok my bad ill stop being cringe in the tags now bye
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#ok but fr marking undergrad essays is such a rollercoaster#i gave two very high marks today and was genuinely impressed and then the next three i marked were practically incoherent#one just copy and pasted their intro instead of writing a conclusion. like it's verbatim the same paragraph#i dont mark down for minor grammar and syntax errors because there's a high rate of ESL students...#... but some of the papers from native english speakers have me more concerned about functional illiteracy than I've ever been#these are 19-20yos in a humanities field at a top university! even the highest scoring essay had basic basic grammar errors and vocab misuse#at least i could tell what the student was trying to say there but some of the others...#if your punctuation and spelling and syntax are all so bad that i literally cant tell what you're trying to say there is a serious problem#even setting aside how many errors like these there were there's the flip side of the issue: actually writing an essay#the last one i marked yesterday had no structure or thesis or secondary sources#everything between the intro and conclusion was the same claim phrased in different ways with some irrelevant non sequitur quotes thrown in#no analysis other than the words 'analysis of this shows' which is *gasp* not a substitute for analysis#OH AND OMG#one made a direct claim about a figure's political stance and attached a footnote. i went to see what the student's source was.#the footnote literally said something like 'i know i should have a source here but it's only context and i don't want to waste my word count#like what???? do you think claims about relevant context don't need evidence??? and the audacity to not give a citation...#... and claim it's because it would take too many words away from your main argument??#just providing the actual citation for the claim would have been 3-5 words max but the footnote about not having room was 30 words#kid do you think i can't tell that you dont have that citation? do you think anyone's buying that you didn't include it to save space?#it's the very first footnote and most of the others are full-length bibliography entries jammed into the footnotes (which we don't require)#so either you were 'worried about space' at the first footnote then changed your mind as you wasted 250 words on unnecessary formatting#or you were over the word limit and were like 'gotta cut something!' and the only footnote you 'simplified for space' was a short basic one#^assuming i believed you. which i dont. because why would you think that would fool anyone.#i still have half the essays left. im tired and so disappointed in how little we're told we should expect from them
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guys it's fucking happening it's . i've. thronecoming chapter 1 done
#IF I HAD THE ENERGY TO SCREAM>............. GOD I DONT EVEN KNOW IF I WOULD. I THINK I WOULD JUST FAINT ACTUALLY#OK OKOKO KOKO K HERE WE GO HERE WE FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#ONE DOWN. NINETEEN TO GO#eah#ever after high#gum rewrite#gum talk
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