#i dont know if we will ever be ok.
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There is nothing my heart craves more at this mentally draining time than genuine happiness. Please. I will take anything.
#feb 2024#been spending a lot of time in the hospital with my grandmother. it looks like thse are her final days.#shes lost her ability to speak. not sure if its the alzheimer or covid and it hindering her since she is barely breathing.#not to mention the random gunshots and explosions you'd hear whenever you're in there because of the clashes#im barely making sense but my brain isnt braining#imagine gunshots and explosions being so frequent in your area that you could her one coming from the children's ward#and the only thing you could think is. oh the iof are back? where is my brother? where is my father? i hope they are safe#imagine smelling tear-gas in a ward fulp of elderly who are suffering with covid.#will this ever get better???#im not losing hope but i sure am losing faith in humanity. this is nothing compared to gaza#i saw a video where the stray animals are feeding of the corpses. could you imagine this being your loved one? your child or parent?#seeing people recognising the bodies of there friends by a piece of cloth. because thats the only thing left of them.#im not ok.#i dont know if we will ever be ok.#this has been a tough time and it seems like kts only gonna get worse.#vent
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secret wars secret love you will ALWAYS be famous
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#snap sketches#//draws eriks weird reindeer thing differently to make this pose work// vjELAKVJEALKJV#maybe ill stick to this but i kinda like the 'barricade' vibe of the other option but anyway#mom said its MY turn to reference the famous bridal carry panel#this was supposed to be a quick warm up but as i was lining things my hand started to tremble really bad#i dont know why ??????????????? thats never happened before and my hand's perfectly fine and normal now#like my hands tremble a little from time to time but nothing ever detrimental#the trembling i had today was ACTUALLY crazy bad. had me concerned but i was also able to still draw so not that bad ig#ANYWAYS. yeah <3 i wanted to reference tha panel we all love ......#i draw this mfer carrying his mfer so much i fear i cant be stopped. charles is a princess who needs to be princess carried#i usually draw it like. An Actual Block or whatever but its flatter ... so charles may rest his weary head ...#i did draw charles getting a handful. its what he deserves. its also what i deserve but i cant have that now can i#erik living my dream too tho ..... life is so unfair i wanna carry charles xavier and kiss his head this life SUCKS#slowly being able to feed my cherik fix again we're Semi back. once i finish my work for once THEN we'll be so fuckin back jWRKLJLAKF#ok thats all from me bye bye
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(pre-calam) filling the compendium :-)
+ closeup and the aftermath
#i am PRAYING that this posts okay and nothing gets squished or looks ugly. but if it is youcant tell me because ill cry#okay. anyways.#zelink#zelda#link#loz#botw#totk#link botw#zelda botw#loz fanart#for some reason trying to format this became a sisyphean ass task so now i just want to post it and go lie down or something#“why use warm colours if theyre on satori mountain” idk.... i liked how they looked :)#ok what else. ummm. so we KNOW zelda filled the compendium like she was running the navy right#its really funny because i dont even think its ever mentioned other than like. maybeeee one throwaway line from purah?#but there was a fandom osmosis moment bcus everyone Knew she'd be on top of it. and its true. she would be.#my art
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my favorite coming-of-age teen sitcom
#soup art#professor layton#hershel layton#randall ascot#angela ledore#all of these were drawn out before i crunched out chapter 6 at like. 3am. pained smile.#what if they were all friends. and all happy . what if they were buddies . and everything was ok. you ever consider that?#ive been told nothing else about the road ahead aside from 'it gets worse before it gets better'. so im absolutely jazzed lads#i dont even know how it COULD get worse. but we ball ig !!!!!!!!!!#ok enough rambling . shoutout to the last doodle for teaching me how to properly paint again#had a LOT of fun rendering that background :]
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a little family
#buddy daddies#my art#doodles#sometimes a family is an two misfit assassins and the daughter of the guy you offed and thats a okay#but lets not talk about that#we love healing in this house and how do you heal if not after suffering#reis journey through depression and kazukis journey through grief#what 1 little girl does to a man#its 5 am all i can offer are doodles but i love them very much#i know we do reasonably get to call them cowards for not making it gay (esp at the end bc come on)#but i do love whatever relationship they have going becuase theyre just. Thats marriage babe....#theyre not going to be doing any dating with that committment that is the most domestic ass setting ive ever seen#everyone and their mother assumes theyre married/dating and doesnt even question it because theres NO QUESTION T O ASK#only the people involved apparently dont know theyre married#ok nvm they were cowards for not making it gay. but again. theyre clearly married your honor. theyre just a little stupid
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MAY I HUMBLY REQUEST MORE RENDOG.... I really love your design for him <3
Dude I'm so sorry I drew Tango instead idk what happened
Surprise shiny duo!!! :)
#for real though I hope you dont mind anon!!! I really wanna draw more Rendog but also Ive been wanting to draw him in silly pink clothing#ever since I drew him for the first time#rendog#renthedog#tango tek#tangotek#trafficblr#secret life#secret life fanart#Ren is so sweet and silly I love him so dearly#red winter and bloodshed and stuff like ok whatever you say little guy#You see a sign warning you of a mean violent guard dog and the dog is just Ren asking if he may bite you. “is that alright if I bite you.”#How do Tango's clothes fit on him? Please do not ask me that. We both know Tango's not gonna be able to wear those clothes again though#I will draw more Rendog for sure!!!#tubby art
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sometimes i remember "I have love for you" & "I loved you, best i could" is canon and i have to chew glass about it
#those first three episodes man#for a second there i felt like they looked into my soul and gave me everything i didnt know i wanted#messy and complicated and EVERYTHING to me#dont even get me started on run from me again#like ok god. god#no matter how youre interpreting that love. platonic. romantic. past tense. present. WHATEVER. its still absolutely buckwild that they said#it! that they said anything#i mess around with them a lot in a lot of different ways#(they consume me)#but not gonna lie!!!!! didnt think they could say it!!!! not in the depths of the darkness!!! not even to themselves!!!!!!#its an unspoken truth. we never acknowledge it and we never have to acknowledge the rest#(that its gone sour. that the love is not what we want. that its no good. that its not the same)#aughhhhhhh#ok im good im good.#yall ever think about edizzy?#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#israel hands#edward teach#edizzy#blackhands
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being in art school and having basically 0 knowledge about christianity whatsoever is so funny at this point i think you could tell me literally anything was an allegory for jesus and i'd just believe you
#my ass has been to church like twice in my entire life so my peers are like 'this is a biblical allegory' and im like yeah ok sure#makes art history class very annoying tho because everyone just assumes you can look at a stained glass window and know who all the guys ar#also sometimes people will be like this image depicts the story of david or peter or some random other biblical name#and then just. not elaborate. because apparently we all know the stories of every biblical guy who ever existed.#who is peter and why is he in the church window. please#and i dont even have an EXCUSE bc like both ethnically and like in basic practice i am christian. i celebrate christmas or whatever#my parents both just fucking hated church so much as children they were like nah were not doing that#and now i have a deficiency in Identifying White Men In Paintings apparently.#sigh. sorry just got a 5 out of 13 on an art history quiz feeling GREAT
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learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way
#experiencing some BIG FEELINGS OVER THIS REVELATION#listen i have never ever been bothered abt not seeing someone in a while or making time to talk to them bc in my mind its like not thst muc#time has passed. i mean it with every fibre of my being that when im like 'oh its ok even though we havent talked in a while and have our#own things going on it doesnt mean we're not friends anymore since we left things on a good note 8 months ago' i sincerely believe that#and for the longest time i just thought everybody makes peace with it at some point and not automatically assuming the other person doesnt#wanna talk to me anymore or smth. my longest lasting friendships are with ppl who work the same way i just thouhght that was normal#whatever organ everybody has that makes them reach out to their friends and plan hang outs i probably dont have it#i was already hesitant to ask out Alex bc i spend almost every waking hour doing smth that isnt talking to ppl unless they happen to be in#the vicinity. and at first it was bc i planned on making sure i had everything set up so i dont get stressed out and do it one at a time#but then i find out theres a friendship decay mechanic? and after dating and marrying someone you lose -10 friendship points for every#day u dont talk to them?? actually ive probably been losing friendship points this whole time without knowing bc of this?????#and i notice a lot of my own habits are also reflected in how i play bc ive been avoiding getting close to pierre and marnie since its more#of a professional relationship. like i know theyre npcs but im approaching it the way i would in real life its fucking nuts#i think its a little relieving im playing /as/ a character than myself bc as im playing im just making up little interactions in my head#than approaching things the way i would myself so it takes a bit of the stress off trying to put myself in there as a spectator. but well#being in a relationship demands a certain amount of energy even more so when theyre things that already take up energy on its own#like making time to talk to your partner and make sure they know theyre loved. i dont always have energy to put all my mental focus into it#and this is true for real life so im not really bothered by not dating anyone. but when its a game and i want my character to be with someo#and i know its fully optional and i know i could just apply the same logic to this i dont /want/ to. sometimes i want to experience#the same things other people do at least to a certain degree without the same emotional andmental stakes#no offense krobus#yapping#stardew#stardew valley#puppy plays sdv#sdv#this game has me by the ankles man
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nickel and balloon would be so much more interesting if people explored the way nickel became everything awful that balloon used to be but so much worse ironically all in the name of "protecting" everyone from that history repeating. and not softboy tsundere yaoi or whatever is going on in those tags rn
#meeple.txt#inanimate insanity#iii they could so easily make me hate you.#nickloon arc was the worst thing to ever come out of iii#unnecessarily long and stupid and hilariously poorly written#i actually feel insane seeing how many people just accept it at face value as The Canon#i know it Is canon but i dont care. Heart❤️#we need to bring back the fandom energy of collectively rejecting the shitty writing#nickloon arc did not happen its ok. take my hand#in my heart nickel digs himself a deeper hole of denying he did any wrong and everyone at most tolerates him#fits his character built up by s2 so much better and parallels other characters too#somewhere deep in his head i feel like he knows hes wrong. but by god it should not have been that easy to ''fix'' him#hes going to deny it until it kills him bc that means facing any regret or deeper feelings he doesnt wanna deal with#and that means admitting he made mistakes which is a huge blow to his ego#and his Cool Tough Leader personality#hes not gonna give that up so easily#and i dont think its in character for him to change within the timeframe of the show tbh . at least with the time they have left now#thats like a post canon Maybe to me#the only way ill accept it really
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To volve
Aka My horrid amalgamation of different scenes from batgirl 2000 for @casscainweek day 4 (quotes|panels) :)
#ooohhh cass shes so cool characters when they have a chatarcter arc augh#casscainweek2025#cass cain#cassandra cain#dc#and for anyone curious what panels/quotes im loosely referncing its all from batgirl 2000 like i said. purple hoodie is the am i volving?#scene my beloved#foreground cass is from when she tells whats his face that you can change#and background cass is her before her death match with shiva saying and then il die#because i am insane about all of that and more#cass is so cool guys for real she is in my brain#duuudeee women when they go thinking perfection for a year is worth death rather than being meidorce and girls when they are filled with#dread that nothing they will do will forgive them from their sins but maybe you can change or you must be able to change because otherwise#she might as well kill herself and girls when they realise they have come far from that horrible place she was and that she is in motion an#and really she can change she is changing and if she can change so can everyone and maybe everyone can change and volve becauuse we are in#motion and im gonna throw up#and then her city blows up and whats even the point duudeeeee#shes just in a better place by the end cradeling my head duudeeeee#most fucked up woman ever filled with so much hope or is it hope who fucking knows maybe its just guilt i dunno but like she gets betterdud#ahem#yes#wohoo cass week. sadly dont have time for more art tho ://#also casscainweek mods hope its ok to tag ypu guys? makes it easier for people to find your blog so i hope you dont mind :)
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minedai week day 2: vacation/beach
Prompts
#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#snap sketches#yakuza series#yakuza 3#daigo dojima#yoshitaka mine#minedai#technically the prompt isboth but sue me anyways#we know my ass too tired to do anything when i resort to drawin em marshmallow style#yk im tired as balls when i dont seize the opportunity for thirst trap mine posting.... woAgh....#theyre silly..... also i did give mine a 'sniper rifle' because the only time he ever fuckin shot and hit anyone was with a rifle#he cant aim otherwise but if you slap a big fat scope on his eyeball he should do fine#ok bye i think i wanna doodle something else.....
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🧙♀️🐈���⬛
#xmen#avengers#xmen comics#avengers comics#wanda maximoff#scarlet witch#francesca the cat#ORGANIC FRANCESCA POSTING FROM SNAP ??more likely than you think..#snap sketches#did i doodle this just so i could rant in my tags. maybe.#i will talk about this doodle first tho ... cause i still like to ramble bout my own stuff....#uhhh i just wanted to draw wanda :) and fran :) yeah thats it jvAELKJEKLAJ#thought itd be cutesy ... they can be friends ... if mags will be apprehensive about the cat wanda will be the exact opposite#its only natural ..... ok Unrelated Vent/Ramble Time#i was very mad when i started drawing this but ive mellowed out considerably... still i love complaining..#ill delete my venty ranty tags in the morn .. for now i need my piece read .. or at least out there for my sanity ..#anyways tldr we all know i hate my mom and i very much do not like using 'hate' so lightly when i hate I Hate#like you know the hate speech from I Have No Mouth yeah literally me. literally me about my mom#most days i tolerate her because she barely exists in the same room as i for more than thirty seconds#but tonight. Ugh. note to self remember to never ask her for anything again. as is what ive said for years..#what a fool i was to think that would ever change. THAT in of itself is whatever yk her being irritating when it comes to. Being A Parent#but then she had the gall to start talking about my dad like oh my god see NOW im getting mad again#nothing makes me angrier than her talking about my dad like. UGH ill cap it there so i dont catch on fire somehow#also ill feel compelled to drop three novel's worth of lore and i dont have tags for that. also this is just supposed to be a cute doodlejV#i had plans to draw something else that was cutesy but then i got mad and couldnt focus on it#so now we're here... in any case bye bye. ill try to continue that other idea..#then i wanna focus on another thing.... if i make any progress on That afterwards it'll be a miracle
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boggles my mind that inhumans are taught english in school but not tilan sign language. the only way their 20+ years ruling monarch can communicate. and one of their two native languages. black bolt what are you DOING over there
#like. its not even an elective??#ok granted i dont know about the specifics because marvel wont give me my extensive inhumans lore and culture book#but come onnnn you cant convince me not ONE person has ever been like 'hey blackagar. shouldnt we like teach that. maybe.'#theres not ONE other deaf/HoH/mute inhuman that signs??#you GOTTA at least put the alphabet in a book somewhere. wwait does he even Have like an alphabet#he has to. surely. obviously he nevers fingerspells in the comics but he has to have an alphabet#I WANT MY EXTENSIVE INHUMANS LORE AND CULTURE BOOK!!! AND I WANT TO KNOW TILAN SIGN LANGUAGE!!!!!!#blackagar boltagon#inhumans
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ok but look at our cute wedding
#jjk261? i dont know her :/#this is my canon now bye gege#satoru getting isekai'd to stardew after dying#at first he hates it bc its boring af compared to the life hes used to#but then we meet and fall in love and live happily ever after#and suddenly a seemingly mundane normal life isnt so bad when you get to spend it with the person you love with all ur heart 🤧#......also i modded it so he follows me and we go on adventures#he beats up the monsters in the mine while his wife collects shiny rocks ajdnskdnskdjsksjkaka#ok my bad ill stop being cringe in the tags now bye
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#ok but fr marking undergrad essays is such a rollercoaster#i gave two very high marks today and was genuinely impressed and then the next three i marked were practically incoherent#one just copy and pasted their intro instead of writing a conclusion. like it's verbatim the same paragraph#i dont mark down for minor grammar and syntax errors because there's a high rate of ESL students...#... but some of the papers from native english speakers have me more concerned about functional illiteracy than I've ever been#these are 19-20yos in a humanities field at a top university! even the highest scoring essay had basic basic grammar errors and vocab misuse#at least i could tell what the student was trying to say there but some of the others...#if your punctuation and spelling and syntax are all so bad that i literally cant tell what you're trying to say there is a serious problem#even setting aside how many errors like these there were there's the flip side of the issue: actually writing an essay#the last one i marked yesterday had no structure or thesis or secondary sources#everything between the intro and conclusion was the same claim phrased in different ways with some irrelevant non sequitur quotes thrown in#no analysis other than the words 'analysis of this shows' which is *gasp* not a substitute for analysis#OH AND OMG#one made a direct claim about a figure's political stance and attached a footnote. i went to see what the student's source was.#the footnote literally said something like 'i know i should have a source here but it's only context and i don't want to waste my word count#like what???? do you think claims about relevant context don't need evidence??? and the audacity to not give a citation...#... and claim it's because it would take too many words away from your main argument??#just providing the actual citation for the claim would have been 3-5 words max but the footnote about not having room was 30 words#kid do you think i can't tell that you dont have that citation? do you think anyone's buying that you didn't include it to save space?#it's the very first footnote and most of the others are full-length bibliography entries jammed into the footnotes (which we don't require)#so either you were 'worried about space' at the first footnote then changed your mind as you wasted 250 words on unnecessary formatting#or you were over the word limit and were like 'gotta cut something!' and the only footnote you 'simplified for space' was a short basic one#^assuming i believed you. which i dont. because why would you think that would fool anyone.#i still have half the essays left. im tired and so disappointed in how little we're told we should expect from them
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