#i dont have a drivers license!
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every time i get an email im like NO!
#leave me alone!#who are you to tell me what offers to take advantage of??#dont tell me to lock in my auto loan rate!#i dont have a drivers license!#i dont take orders from banks or from anybody unless they are a rich older woman in a position of power over me and its for sex reasons.
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making a new post bc the other one is pretty bulky, im about to be severely overdrafted when i pay my rent in a few days and i really really really cant let that happen :( pls if you have anything to spare i'd appreciate it, im in the process of finding a new job because my current one refuses to give me hours. im transmasc and i dont have a car so finding a job has been difficult but im doing everything i can to make ends meet. even just spreading this around helps
pp: paypal.me/bewearrr
vnm: tobias_leviathan
thank you 🥺💕
90/450
#ive been rejected from multiple jobs simply because I don't have a car. even the ones i dont need to travel for#i have drivers license and a bus route but thats not good enough#its not like i even tell them i dont have a car either like they Find Out or theres some situation where i have to disclose that info#which feels illegal but whatever#anyways i am so fucking hopeless for the future im so terrified idk how im gonna pay my bills next month#ive tried asking for more hours at my current job but they dont care!!!! they dont fucking care!!!!!#idk how i went from having full time hours to working one day a week so suddenly but i hate it#and the worst part is theyre really guilt trippy about it and the managers are constantly talking abt it in the group chat#like they have all these extreme standards they only give you hours if you go way above and beyond in every aspect#even my good coworkers have been getting their hours cut#like even the IMPORTANT people arent getting hours#its fucked up!!!! never ever ever work for sheetz its a fucking nightmare#ive signed up for multiple temp agencies and none of them have given me any leads#im working on comms every day but it takes me so long to work on one piece that the process has been slow#im about to apply to work at fucking mcdonalds or something like its THAT bad rn i really dont want to but what other choice do i have
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have now been trying to speedrun mastering driving and its not working because on the off chance that i DO want to go somewhere (rare) then it's never worth Actually Driving to get there.
I've been wanting to go to the mall for 2 days bc i wanna look around, and its like you'd BE DRIVING just to go somewhere and walk around for a bit and maybe spend money? And then have to drive back? For that? For walking around and spending money? I'm good, I'll just stay home. The desire to go out immediately killed by the reality of having to drive there
(this user has had his driver's license for 7 years)
#its not even about it being difficult its just mentally exhausting#i really had to force myself to drive 5 minutes away to get a snack 2 weeks ago#and its not bc the drive there is Hard its bc why would i do all that just do get an ice cream brownie. i enjoyed it but it doesnt#seem Worth it#like regardless of the drive time or reason for driving#its the ''we have food at home'' equivalent of. idk. having experiences#talkys#i have to add the drivers license part now bc ppl keep thinking i dont have it...i do i just never had a car until 2 yrs ago 😭#sometimes i feel that thing where its like. you lose the desire to go bc its not as simple as ''get in car -> drive'' it feels more like#get up get dressed get keys enter car turn on car buckle up leave driveway drive to location#which makes it exhausting but thats not the case rn specifically like i do wanna go i can manage to get dressed. but it just doesnt feel#worth all the trouble#but also nothing would make it worth all the trouble#not worth it to get a snack not worth it to go walk around not worth it even if it was a 2hr drive to see someone. its simply not worth it
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I have too many ideas in my brain NOT ENOUGH TIME TO EXECUTE THEM
Still thinking of my alien x oth series, there will be more.
But i’ve also been watching dandadan & I wanna draw oth stuff for that too… but I also have the zine… and some asks I wanna answer.. and christmas gifts to draw…
AND MY PORTFOLIO FOR UNI
Also i’m slowly setting up a bsky for more general stuff, but this will remain oth centric (and lets be honest, I have insane off the hook brainrot anyways) so I might share that later at some point
#squid rambles#rory dont be insanely busy impossible challenge#I pick up projects like stray dogs pick up fleas#and I have my JOBS#and my DRIVERS LICENSE CLASSES#anyways blehhh#send me your strength soldiers
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being trans in the uk moodboard
#applied for a new drivers license and they keep sending it back for completely arbitrary shit- you dont have to fill out medical info#for changing your name#they sent it back because i didnt fill out my medical info 👍#its been THREE MONTHS now.#gp is refusing to write a letter so i can change my gender on my passport. for no reason other than he feels like it#whatever. going to get incredibly stoned tonight 🎉#peace and love ❤️🕊#flashing#gifs#<- this post is a fucking eyesore LMFOSNS
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I love trains... I should become train driver besides making drawings
#i have been on 5 different trains today#counting metro#you aint never gonna see me in a car unless im doing something badass with it like illegaly racing it#i dont think i need a driver's license for that
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if my parents keep talking to me im going to (remembers that suicide jokes are bad for mental health) go outside and dig a hole to narnia
#borbtalks#'borb u got a letter from vsp. why are you paying for vsp. i dont think u need it bc of xyz. oh you're getting mail from y insurance?#they're a good company. im also covered under them. are they cheaper than ur previous one? they must be. did u know medicare has a page#online where u can compare all the plans? well did you? ik you've been on medicare longer than me but idk if you knew :/#sooo do u have a valid drivers license? oh when did u get it renewed? when does it expire? we were looking at car insurance earlier...#oh btw when are they gonna reevaluate u for disability? do u know? when did they last reevaluate u? when do they reevaluate others?#ANYWAY. what if i brought over x's dog. the dog that stresses ur cats out so much that they puke everywhere and spend all day hiding :)#wdym it'll stress [cat] out. what if he. didn't get stressed? :)'#like SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP#cant even walk into the bathroom without her trying to talk to me. can't make dinner w/o her trying to talk to me#and of course im the bad guy in telling her not to stress the cat out#just by saying 'vet says he's not supposed to get stressed out. he's at a higher risk for blockage if he does#which will KILL him.'#same woman who sat next to me while i was the phone w/ the phone company. petting the cat and whispering 'oh borb abuses u doesn't he?#maybe ill just steal you away one day. keep u away from borb. oh yes borb treats u oh so horribly.'#and my dad. sitting on the other side of me. said absolutely nothing.#i get it. im the family's designated fuck up!! the designated brat !!!! and no one gives a shit if my feelings get hurt !!!!!!!#i swear. my mother could smack me and everyone would rush to her side and comfort her stinging hand
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we need to abolish the sex binary now and i mean it
#cricket.chatterbox#Might. elaborate more in the mornjng#i have just had so many gotdamn stupid conversations recently#im also confiscating ‘afab’ and ‘amab’ from my peers until they learn#how to use Any Term Ever correctly. losing my fucking mind#YOU CANNOT JUST SAY ‘AFAB PPL’ YOU DONT KNOW WHAT ANTONE HERE#WAS ASSIGNED WHEN THEY FIRST CAME OUT OF THE WOMB YOU#HAVE NOT SEEN MY DRIVERS LICENSE AND YOU DONT KNOW MY MEDICAL HISTORY#kms. i don’t mean that. ijust#jfc
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I think I'm gonna try learning how to drive again, but I'm very anxious about it
#my dad is an excellent driver but he hates driving bc he thinks everyone else on the road is an idiot asshole#my mom is a very anxious driver and didnt learn until she was in her thirties#i want to try to get my license before i turn 30#bc not having a license has been severely limiting my life#i had my learners permit three years ago and i was like. im gonna learn. but then i drove on the actual road before i felt ready#and never drove again after that lol#and idk i work a $14/hr job bc i dont have any other opportunities within walking distance of my home#and if i want to go down a different career path ill need to drive - both to expand job opportunities and as part of the job requirements#and. ugh i wish i lived somewhere with public transportation so i wouldnt have to drive#but i dont and i think im stuck here for the foreseeable future. so i just gotta start learning again and this time stick with it
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girls… i quit my job. sorry
#im gonna get a drivers license so i dont have to bum rides and then look for jobs with my new extended range#maybe a receptionist of some sort. my friend azrael is a receptionist snd im so fucking jealous
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<- god's wettest most pathetic most stressed most anxious beast btw
#i have a flight in 2 days and i hate airports they stress me out so much too many people *vine boom*#i lost my driver's license last month so i'm gonna have to get through the tsa without legal photo ID *vine boom*#the flight takes off at 7am meaning im gonna have to wake up at like 4 to get there *vine boom*#it also means i need to stay the night tomorrow with some family friends i barely know *vine boom*#so i need to do laundry and email teachers and shit Tonight *vine boom*#my ride busted a tire and got stranded in the middle of nowhere so now i have to worry abt his safety and also find a new ride *vine boom*#AND I'VE GOT A FUCKING LAB DUE TOMORROW#so now im just doing homework and daily tasks and whatnot walking around all chill like i dont feel like the most stressed being alive#conclusion: oh shit the Creature is back
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I cannot rely on one person for me to be happy my happiness isn't allowed to be only triggered by one person I can be happy at every little thing it doesn't matter about this one person
#im in too far fucking deep again#and when he leaves again its gonna hurt just as much. but more.#finch posts#he makes me happy beyond belief and i goddamn love having a friend who knows me inside out and has done for so long#but. your love is my drug by kesha comes to mind. its fucking intoxicating talking to him#and last time he left (we were 12 and his parents moved their family) it made me kinda depressed and i was so fucking needy to talk to him#and now we're three and a half months into rekindling the friendship and i feel the same like i get really sad already >#>if i just dont talk to him for a couple of days without like a trip or friends or smthn else to entertain me#songs are starting to remind me of him#fuck fuck fuck#1am in the morning makes me too honrst#i think im still a bit (a lot) in love with them#ohmygod i dont even think it i know it#i should go to sleep earlier#it would stop me having so many thoughts#i havent seen him in multiple years but i can still imagine kissing him#oh fucking hell fuck my actual whole fucking life#and his closest friend where he lives now well they were starting to be a bit of a thing and surely its not fucking normal>#>to daydream about kissing a girl who ive literally never seen a photo of#holy fucking hell i am such a hopeless poly bisexual#WHY DONT WE REWRITE THE STARSSSS#oh this is circling round to my suspicions i might be kinda like demi romantic??#i should buy myself flowers . wait. no. i grow flowers 🫠#well i could still buy myself flowers . and i should#i need to go to the beach#cant wait to get a proper drivers license#if youve made it this far down my crisis hi youve gotten to the stage where u can tell what songs im listening to!
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*cries* everything is so expensive
#gopher rambles#older adults are always like “gopher you should get your driver's license and get a car so you dont have to rely on your dad'#THANKS I SHOULD DO A LOT OF THINGS. WE DONT HAVE THE FUCKING MONEY FOR THAT#so i look into bikes! and that is ALSO EXPENSIVE. i have a bicycle. i love her. she is a beach cruiser#i live. on a fucking hill. have you tried to climb hills on a beach cruiser? its doable but you're better off walking it up the hill#so mountain bike then. right? well a bike ride to Just My College is over TWO FUCKING HOURS#so ebike? expensive. so. fucking. expensive. far cheaper than a car+insurance+gas! but still. so. expensive.#complaining#vent ish
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Just when I think the day's going well, I crash a golf cart
#summer camp tag#ace is a mess#i do not have a drivers license and i havent even been behind the wheel in like 4 years since i stopped lessons cus of the pandemic#the day was going fine i got loads done didnt feel like i was irritating my director too bad#doing some paperwork for her and she says when im done well take the golf cart out while its not currently raining#im like ooh fun never been in a golf cart before i see the higher up staff in them im not gonna say no to chilling in a golf cart#i did not realise that meant i would be driving esp when she asked if id been in one before and i said no#she then asked if i could drive and i said not really thought that would be it#cus i was supposed to be studying for my theory before working towards my practical#but no she insists im driving and first off i gotta reverse outta this bay now at least i didnt have to think about gears#but i hate tryna figure out how to turn whilst in reverse in mess with my brain im not great with shape visualisation#we do all our stops its fine for the most part a lil too fast going down some of the hills#and some tight turns but my turns were always like that cus im too busy focusing on the most immediate thing#we get back i park fine and then shes like oh actually there are some more stops we can make so i reverse and turn back out#do our two stops with only minimal confusion about direction then as i go to park into the bay we came from#shes like oh actually park in the bay closest to the health centre and what i should have done was reversed and adjusted my angle#instead i drove directly into the supporting beam separating the two bays 🙃😭#i immediately turn the cart off and expect her to switch with me instead shes like laughing it off oh it was just a little bump it was fine#im like it was not that was a loud ass bang i feel so bad and then she lifts up the light cover i broke off saying its just a scratch#and i feel worse so pf course thats when the camp director comes out to check on the noise and i dont think ive ever worn a guiltier look#but theyre both laughing it off oh just having a little driving lesson :) and i am mortified#she gets back in the cart and shes still insisting that its fine and i should still park after that which i do with great trepidation#but there are no more problems and the lights still work but the cover does need fixing and i just oh my god#ive never crashed before never clipped or scratched a car so of course id crash the golf cart trying to park of all things 😭
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Being turned away from every legal process imaginable has been kinda reminding me of that time i got kicked out of the SAT for being trans, and like man, has that happened to anyone else? Like is that just something that routinely happens to us but gets no media coverage or am i just the unluckiest person on the planet?
#transgender#trans man#ive been getting turned away from everything cause i dont have a drivers liscense#so i cant verify my id via most of our systems#they wont let me make a bank account#(one of the other ways you can verify your id is via mail but it has to be mail with like legal significance like bank statements#i cant get bank statements to verify my id cause they wont let me make a bank account)#trans teenagers if your out there reading this please learn to drive get your license#okay i swear no one ever talks about it much but the process of changing your name is ass#ive been working on this shit for like over a year#yeah guys no ones doing this to get in bathrooms#there are ways to rape women that involve much less government beurocracy than this#oh did you guys know college board doesnt recognize trans men#they have a gender label for mtf but not ftm#found that out the other day
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i was watching a music video for a japanese song and it had built in youtube english captions so i went to turn those on but then i saw that there was like an option for "English" and then a second option for "English (Canada)" and i realized in a few seconds it was just a workaround to having two sets of english captions, one with colour changes in the lettering and one without for accessibility (the canada one was the non-fancy lettering) but for a moment i was living in a world where they were making dedicated canadian english translations for things..... measuring temperature in celsius and height in feet...... paying with loonies and toonies... going to the WASHROOM
#pencil crayons for colored pencils is a favourite but its mostly just an ontario thing tho from what ive heard LOL#calling electricity hydro is another good one. although that also depends on province <3 ontario and i think BC? and maybe more#sorry im ontarian. you can make fun of me for it its okay.#you know sometimes i think about attempts at 'canada english' settings in word processors and stuff#they always suck ass. because every person in this god damn country uses whatever word and spelling they want LOL#like theres some general likelihoods like colour and favourite are common. but centre or center? its like 50-50#i personally use both. depending on i dont know. context? the phase of the moon and stars?#theatre and theatre i see both as well and also personally use both but i have like specific rules for myself for some reason#i use theatre for playhouses and theater for movie theaters. i dont know why#and dont get me started on measurements. thats another combo of context and personal preference#people who work more in like trades switch a lot because of product labels but tend to lean more imperial#people who work in like i dunno. chemistry or something probably use a lot of metric#the average person working in neither? honestly they'll probably say both in the same sentence at least where i live#when installing art basically everyone uses both inches and cms depending on which ones more convenient on the ruler LOL#our drivers licenses in ontario say our heights in cm but literally no one can picture it with the cm measurement because#colloquially everyone says heights in feet and inches. its fine. its fine#edit: WAIT i got so distracted by measurement bullshit i forgot to mention the song. it was insomnia by eve#good tune as usual of eve and also a really beautifully animated and emotionally intense music video
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