#i don't like this very much but i think it's mostly because i let it sit too long so here!

[thankskenpenders]

Thoughts on two specific areas of the writing in Sonic X Shadow Generations

The best new 3D Sonic game in over a decade (or even two, depending on who you ask) dropped late last year. And I didn't write anything about it! Sometimes life happens. Well, I've finally sat down to finish Shadow Generations, and by now everyone has already been singing its praises for three months. This is the rare instance where the entire Sonic fandom, and even mainstream reviewers, are in agreement on something. The level design is the best it's been in a long, long time and the cool factor is off the charts, embracing Sonic's peak cringe era in an incredibly confident way. It's great. If you're even reading this post, you probably don't need me to tell you that. So I won't!

No, what I'm really interested in here is the writing. Because this is me we're talking about. But I actually don't want to talk about the main narrative of Shadow Generations, which is really solid little story about Black Doom trying to mold Shadow into his perfect soldier. No, I'd like to zero in on two other aspects of the writing here: the revisions made to Sonic Generations, and Gerald Robotnik's unlockable journal.

The updated Sonic Generations script

The new package mostly presents Sonic Generations how you remember it. There are some tweaks, but it's not a major overhaul. Graphically, I don't think the game has been touched much, if at all. I certainly can't notice any difference without a side-by-side comparison, despite playing it on a PS5. The most notable update is that the game's script has been rewritten by Ian Flynn.

Naturally, this caught my attention. Generations always had a nothingburger story, so with Ian rewriting Pontac and Graff's lame dialogue there was nowhere to go but up. (I don't like to pin the blame for those games' stories entirely on them, as a ton of it was dictated to them by Sonic Team, but, well, I don't think they're very good dialogue writers.) But it's less a complete rewrite and more like Ian was brought on as a script doctor for some minor touch ups here and there. Many lines of dialogue are completely identical to how they were originally written in 2011, and many others only have slight wording changes. Ian was clearly not allowed to request additional scenes or extend the ones that already existed. He has to match the original beat for beat so that they can reuse 99% of the cutscene animations. Don't expect it to be a whole new experience compared to the original.

Still, I think the new script is an improvement, albeit a minor one. Various things have been tweaked to maintain characterization consistency. Cream calls Sonic "Mr. Sonic" instead of just "Sonic." Instead of calling Sonic "buddy," Rouge uses the pet name "Blue," like she tends to do in things like the IDW comics. Espio doesn't have to remind you in the dialogue that he's a ninja, and he no longer has a line making it sound like he has some kind of soul reading power. I also like that Modern Sonic now actually has responses to what his friends say when he rescues them, rather than being silent like Classic Sonic. They won't blow you away, but they make Sonic feel a little more engaged with everything.

In general, the altered dialogue just seems tighter to me, and some of the more childish or trite wording of Pontac and Graff's script has been altered. Here, let's actually make a direct comparison, just because this stuff is interesting to me as a writer. Here's a couple lines from after the Egg Dragoon fight late in the game, in the original script:

Modern Eggman: Ooooh... I can't believe this! I was supposed to beat you this time. Modern Sonic: Aw, I'm sorry! I didn't get that memo. I beat you every time! [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat this guy every time. It's like it's our job or something!

This is a simple exchange. Eggman is mad that he lost. Sonic is unflappably confident because he always beats Eggman, and he explains this to his younger self. But the wording here isn't particularly good. Eggman's simple and direct wording makes him come off like a little kid who's mad because his older brother beat him at Mario Kart, rather than a mad scientist who just had his plans foiled. It's making light of the situation.

And I've never liked Sonic saying "It's like it's our job or something!" That doesn't feel like a thing Sonic would say, it feels like a thing an outside observer would say about Sonic. This is a frequent problem with so-called "MCU dialogue," where quips meant to echo the commentary of a casual, somewhat disinterested audience are inserted into the story itself so that the writers can be like "See? We get it. We're genre-savvy, too!" It also just reminds me of bad Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric lines like "Rings! It's like they're made for me!"

And then here's Ian's rewrite:

Modern Eggman: I recalibrated everything! This was supposed to be my time! Modern Sonic: Oh, please, keep dreamin', Egg-head. I beat you every time. [Turns to Classic Sonic] No, seriously, we beat him every time. Our score card's flawless.

Eggman's still mad about his defeat, but the line "I recalibrated everything!" makes it more specific. He put all this work into the engineering side of his latest scheme and got tunnel vision, thinking if he got his creations just right there'd be no way he could lose. "This was supposed to be my time!" also turns it into a time travel pun, which is a bonus. He's still pitching a fit over losing, but it feels more like Eggman pitching a fit, rather than sounding childish.

And then instead of saying that beating Eggman is "like his job or something," Sonic says he's got a flawless score card against Eggman. He doesn't take Eggman seriously as a threat—at least, not to his face. He acts like it's all a game. But he conveys this in a way that feels truer to the character, rather than feeling like the words of a real world observer poking fun at the tropes of the Sonic series.

Is this amazing, A+ dialogue that blows me away? No. Again, it's not a completely different scene from the one we already had. Ian had to fit the beats of what was already there. He couldn't go all out and write an all new story confirming his longstanding headcanon that the Time Eater is a remnant of Solaris or whatever. But the wording here makes the existing story land a little better and feel truer to the characters in subtle ways.

But to me, the main change is that the Sonics and Tailses seem to have a more solid understanding of what's going on with the timeline and the Time Eater, compared to how idiotic they sometimes seemed in the original game. Which is good! No more standing outside Green Hill and wondering why it seems so familiar. Thank god. As part of this, yes, there are a few more references to past games in the dialogue, like Sonic briefly being confused about the fact that they're time traveling without the Time Stones, or South Island and Westside Island being acknowledged as the normal locations of Green Hill and Chemical Plant. Yes, ha ha, insert joke about how Ian loves references here. Look, it's Sonic fucking Generations. It's a game built entirely out of nostalgic references. Just own it! And, again, in this instance Sonic and Tails come off as less stupid when they make it clear that they do, in fact, remember their adventures from presumably less than a year ago in-universe.

Eggman, too, seems to have a better understanding of the powers he's toying with. Where in the original vesion his focus was simply on going back in time to undo his previous defeats and he seemed kind of oblivious to how much the Time Eater was actually fucking up the universe, here Eggman says he wants to use the Time Eater to give himself complete control over the entire timeline. Eggman also makes way fewer references to his own failures and shortcomings. Of course he won't admit that Sonic has defeated him time and time again. To him, he's never truly lost—Sonic just keeps delaying the inevitable total victory for the Eggman Empire.

So, yes. The new Sonic Generations script is better. It won't blow anyone away, but it's better than it was. It's been elevated from "kinda lame" to "fine." No, if you really wanna see Ian flex his ability to breathe new life into old Sonic stories, look no further than...

Gerald Robotnik's Journal

Hoo boy.

The story of what happened aboard the ARK has always been... a bit confusing, to say the least. Fans with encyclopedic knowledge of the script for every route of Shadow '05 may disagree, but it's the truth. We've had all the pieces to understand the story for a long time now, but that info was given to us out of order by a pair of unreliable narrators—Gerald, who became a vengeful lunatic shortly before his death, and Shadow, who was subjected to multiple rounds of amnesia and altered memories. Some of the ambiguity left by Sonic Adventure 2 was cleared up in Shadow '05, but that game also retconned in a bunch of new elements to Shadow's backstory (aliens!) that lead to further confusion. Not to mention the fact that that game had multiple routes and only revealed the truth about Shadow if you sat on the ultimate final boss battle for WAY longer than the fight would normally last. Or the fact that Sonic X made its own tweaks in its telling of the story. Or the fact that none of these things ever had the best English translations. I can't blame anyone who hasn't played those games in two decades for not remembering the truth about these characters and getting some details mixed up.

What we needed was something to piece together all of the info we have into one coherent backstory, told in chronological order. And thanks to Shadow Generations, we have that, in the form of an official journal tying together what we knew from Sonic Adventure 2, Shadow '05, and Sonic Battle into the tragic tale of Gerald's rise and fall.

Ian Flynn was the perfect man for the job here as the guy who started his career by tidying up the mess that was the first 159 issues if Archie Sonic. This is what he excels at: taking disparate bits of weird Sonic lore from multiple different sources, boiling them down to their most interesting elements, and connecting it together in a way that will make the audience see the dramatic potential he's always known was there. Rather than feeling like a cynical exercise in franchise building, going back and explaining things that never needed explaining so that people can add more bullet points to the wiki, he puts a new spin on things that retroactively enriches those past stories. The story here means something to the characters involved and gives us a better understanding of them as people, rather than as plot devices to motivate Shadow.

(And, of course, Ian didn't do this journal alone. He wrote the story, but I also have to give a huge shout out to Evan Stanley, who made the final product. All of her handwritten journal entries, sketches, and "photos" included throughout. The physical damage done to the journal over the course of 50 tumultuous years, passing from Gerald to Eggman to a certain special someone at GUN. The way Gerald's handwriting gets less and less legible as his mental state declines. So much love was put into what could have been a mere text dump in a menu, and it really elevates it to the next level. Congrats on officially getting hired by Sega, Evan, you've sure as hell earned it!)

The main idea the journal conveys is that Gerald was under a lot of pressure from a lot of different parties—GUN, the President, his colleagues aboard the ARK, Black Doom, even his own family—and boy did it get to him. The known incidents aboard the ARK mentioned in previous games are put together here to form a story where everything slowly spirals out of control as Gerald keeps compromising his morals to further his research, thinking he'll eventually find some way out of all this because he's a genius. I won't recap that whole story here (if you haven't already played the game and read the journal entries, I would highly recommend at least reading it on the Sonic wiki), but I'd like to highlight my favorite elements of the story, as Ian tells it here.

1) The Eclipse Cannon

Here's something that never quite made sense in Sonic Adventure 2: why does the ARK have a laser that can blow up the Earth built into it? It was supposed to be a peaceful research colony. Sure, Gerald went crazy and swore revenge on the Earth, but, like... when did he have an opportunity to go back up to the ARK and modify it? Did he have someone else do it? How? The ARK was raided by GUN and shut down! And then they arrested him, held him in prison for an unclear period of time, and executed him by firing squad when he was no longer useful! It doesn't add up. Shadow 'the Hedgehog '05 would give its own answer by introducing the Black Arms and saying that the Eclipse Cannon was always supposed to be a secret trump card against the Black Comet. But, like... we know that's kind of a bullshit answer, right? You don't need enough power to blow up a whole planet just to destroy a comet.

Well, the new journal retains what we already knew, but it paints a much more complete picture.

See, long before Gerald ever made a Faustian bargain with Black Doom, he had already made one with an even greater evil: the military. GUN gave Gerald much of the funding for the ARK, Gerald's personal utopian research station in space, but it didn't take long for GUN to start pressuring him to design them weapons. Gerald tried to get GUN off his back by personally contacting the President of the United Federation, and the President gave him an alternative: how about, instead, you just use your genius brain to figure out the secret to immortality for us, so our soldiers can be immortal? Gerald was initially sickened by the notion and found it completely absurd, like chasing a shadow... but given no other option, the sarcastically named Project Shadow soon began in earnest. (Maria would later put a more positive spin on the name after Shadow's awakening, pointing out that a Shadow can show us the direction of the light, like she says in the game itself.)

Of course, this search for the ultimate life form didn't go very well, and without any results on that front GUN kept hounding him for weapons. Gerald would throw them a bone here and there to get them off his back. His research on Chaos resulted in the Artifical Chaos prototypes, which he worried would be used for warfare but could at least theoretically be used for search and rescue missions in floods, in his mind. But that wasn't enough. So he gave them Chaos Drives to power their mechs. And that still wasn't enough. He's got Emerl. He'll give them Emerl. They're not impressed by Emerl. They'll shut the whole ARK down if Gerald doesn't give them something big.

Fine! GUN wants something big? Gerald builds a huge fucking laser cannon into the ARK. However, as a middle finger to GUN, Gerald makes it so powerful that it would destroy the Earth if it was ever fired at any target on its surface. In other words, GUN now has their ultimate weapon of mass destruction, fulfilling his contract, but they can never actually use it. Oh, the delicious irony. (And also Shadow will blow up the Black Comet with it in 50 years yada yada yada.) Is this perhaps extremely shortsighted and naive of Gerald, to believe that such a weapon would never actually be used just because of the risk? Of course. But hey, that's Gerald for you. And I love this as an answer.

(Also, this, uh, kinda echoes something from real life! Remember the bit in Oppenheimer where he says all nuclear war will become unthinkable, and Edward Teller responds "until somebody builds a bigger bomb"? Yeah, Teller went on to conceptualize a superweapon codenamed Project Sundial that would have been able to kill all life on the planet, as the ultimate deterrent for war. This was never made for obvious reasons, but hey, there's a basis for this sort of thinking outside of heightened sci-fi! There's a whole Kurzgesagt video about this if you're interested.)

2) The Biolizard

The Biolizard is, of course, brought up as the initial failed prototype of the ultimate life form, from before Gerald met Black Doom. We don't really learn all that much about it that we didn't already know, but I just love the way it's framed in the story.

As you can see above, we actually get to see a picture of Maria holding up the cute little salamander that would end up mutating into the Biolizard through Gerald's experiments. (Researchers want to figure out how to replicate salamanders' regenerative abilities for humans in real life, too, so this was a natural starting point for the project.) And then, after it grows to a monstrous size and goes out of control, Gerald has to lock it away in an unused sector of the ARK. He needs to keep the poor thing alive for his research into harnessing Chaos Energy, building life support systems directly into it, but he doesn't have the heart to tell Maria what happened. So it just becomes this first dark secret weighing on his conscience. The Biolizard becomes Gerald's Tell-Tale Heart beating beneath the floorboards of the ARK. I love that.

3) Lost Impact was the breaking point for the ARK

Remember the level Lost Impact in Shadow '05? The flashback level on the hero path where Shadow is running around fighting Artificial Chaos enemies on the ARK 50 years ago? Yeah, that wasn't just a random incident. That was important, as we now know due to its placement on the timeline.

See, Emerl's rampage aboard the ARK that was chronicled in Sonic Battle and Dark Beginnings set off a domino effect. Emerl riled up the Artificial Chaos, causing Gerald to lose control of them. They became violent, and so Shadow had to stop them, as depicted in Lost Impact. The thing is, that incident sent an SOS signal to GUN telling them that shit was going down on the ARK. Gerald didsn't fully understand the trouble he was in and assumed that he'd simply be reprimanded by the higher ups, or maybe face legal action. But, well... the next time he heard from GUN, armed troopers were raiding the ARK.

So Lost Impact was the straw that broke the camel's back. I just really like that detail.

4) Maria

And, of course, there's Maria herself. Maria has often been more of a symbol than a character, this perfect embodiment of everything that's good and pure in this world who gets killed to motivate Shadow and Gerald's revenge plots. But I really like the wrinkles this journal adds to her and Gerald's story, and their relationship. This is the most fleshed out they've ever felt.

For one, the journal leans into the idea of Maria's intellectual potential. The rest of the Robotnik family is all geniuses, after all, and she was proving to be a really bright kid. She excelled in her studies on the ARK, and she even helped design Shadow's jet skates and inhibitor rings. When Maria died, the world didn't just lose a symbolic personification of purity. She genuinely could have been a hugely influential scientist who did so much good for the world. That's what Gerald wanted for her. But we'll never know, because GUN killed her.

Speaking of her family, their presence isn't just mentioned for the sake of fleshing out the Robotnik family tree. It's mentioned that as Gerald struggled to find a cure for Maria's illness through his genetic research, he faced mounting pressure from his family. They didn't want Maria to be up on the ARK forever. They wanted Gerald to hurry up and find a damn cure, or otherwise just send her back home to Earth so she could be with her family again. She'd been up on the ARK for so long that Gerald's coworkers started thinking that she had been born up there. Eventually she gains a baby sister on Earth who she's never met. A rift forms between Gerald's two sons, and he's unable to really deal with it because he's so consumed by his work. There's this sense that the family is falling apart, and that everyone is dreading the possibility that Gerald will never find a cure and that Maria will just spend her final years up in space and die far away from her family, because Gerald just couldn't let go. If that happens, it'll break the whole family. But he can't stop now. So he just keeps working. Curing Maria is the only way to win his family back, in his eyes. It can't all be for nothing.

But my favorite detail regarding Maria is this one paragraph:

Maria is growing into a lovely young woman. It breaks my heart that someone as bright and energetic as her is diminished by disease. There are no visible effects, and I've caught my fellow researchers muttering to each other, doubting her illness. It is infuriating. I find all my reason and restraint vanishes when she's slighted.

This is SUCH a great addition to the story! It's always been true that Maria doesn't really seem all that ill, just looking at her in cutscenes. With this one little comment, Ian flips that issue on its head and turns it into a story about invisible disability. She doesn't act like she's in chronic pain, so she must not be, everyone thinks. And this really, really gets to Gerald, as does the pressure from his family. He's dedicating his whole LIFE to saving her, and they think she's faking it?! It's such a small addition, never referenced elsewhere in the journal, but it adds so much flavor to the story, as does the implied family drama. It grounds Gerald and Maria and makes them feel more like real human beings, rather than being pure archetypes. It's just enough info to let my imagination run wild filling in the blanks.

You also get the feeling that Maria being such a walking ray of sunshine was the only real source of joy Gerald had left in his life before Shadow was awakened, and the only thing keeping him from snapping under pressure sooner. All this stuff just keeps piling on, everything's spiraling out of control, but at least Maria is keeping her chin up, right? It makes so much sense that losing her would make him go off the deep end when it's framed like this.

It's just... man, I never thought I'd care so much about Gerald and Maria. But that's the Ian Flynn touch. After years of less than stellar Sonic writing that seemed to be embarrassed of itself, I'm so happy to have new games coming out that fully embrace the history of the series like this, making its world feel so rich and real instead of just serving as an excuse for a string of platforming levels. I don't even like Shadow '05, but I'll be damned if Ian and the rest of Sonic Team didn't make something amazing by "yes, and"-ing Shadow's cringe past here. Sonic has truly reached levels of "we're so back" never thought possible.

[xhda1449x]

okay so I have Opinions TM about this because. well. am asexual. know asexual people. Been Like That before.

I had a friend. She's not my friend anymore. One of the reasons why is that she was a very sex negative asexual. Not repulsed, negative. Sex negative means Against It As A Concept. Repulsed means "ew, I really don't want to hear about any of it and I'm kinda disgusted by the way sexual attraction seems to run the world but yknow, that's me, y'all do you", right. It's a different thing. Some aces don't understand that.

I've known aces who think it's the identity for sex negativity. Aces who are attracted to people in an allo way (!!!) but think sex is gross. The friend I had was like that. Afaik she just... hated men so much she decided that wanting sex with women As A Guy is disgusting behavior so all sex is like that. Because she'd only use the "sex repulsed" card when interacting with guys. Because she was a lesbian and identified as such. Now yeah there are ace lesbians. I've also known a few of those. But that's not the point, the point is that so many people who don't want to have conventional PiV sex find the ace label and think it's for them.

Now uhhh my personal experience with the sex negativity excused as being sex repulsed mindset. So I have ocd. something most people around me know about. Over the years of Me Having It (so like... since I was 8 ig) it manifested in different ways. One of the most annoying intrusive thoughts I'd dealt with was just... my friends, my family members, in sexual situations. Not with me, just kinda... abstract, I guess, but one time I had a wholeass flashback because my friend told me he did indeed sleep with his girlfriend regularly so that's something. It's not really fun, imagining your two platonic-and-nothing-else friends Having Sex In Your Head and not being able to stop it. Also yeahhh the trauma def played a role too. Like, that's most likely what triggered me to Have OCD in the first place, and it took me a long time to get over that (mostly because I couldn't really tell anyone about it. I'm not gonna get into details but let's just say people don't really like to think that a young girl could hurt someone like that).

So now I'm in a relationship. First I've ever had. And I had to deal with Everything by being thrown head first into it. The first year was Hard, with another aspect of the ocd (it's always the ocd) being that I'd question my identity a lot. Sure I was dating someone but I was still ace because I didn't want to have sex with them right? Sure I don't mind the thought but I'm still ace because I wouldn't do it irl? SURE I CAN IMAGINE MYSELF DOING IT IRL BUT I'M STILL ACE, RIGHT, ACES CAN HAVE SEX?????? on top of dealing with Gender Questioning, too. Fun times!!!

But uh. yeah. turns out that I needed some help processing the trauma and now I'm like... the kink-cyclopedia for my friends or something. Like the person in the tags said, it's mostly theoretical. And funny thing is I've Been Like This even when I was a teenager!!! But I both pushed it down because That's Not How Aces Are and overplayed it because I wanted my friends to like me and at the time it seemed as if their only interest was Talking About Sex (idk, teenagers can be like that sometimes, or it can feel that way if you don't relate).

Anyway, yeah. For anyone who's like this (thinking ace is the label for sexual trauma survivors; thinking you're ace because you don't want sex; thinking being ace means being above sexual desires and that somehow making you better than everyone else), I've been there. And it was miserable. I'm still ace, because guess what, I'm still not sexually attracted to anyone besides maybe my partner and even then I'm not sure. But like... the reason why puritans are miserable isn't just because they're all horny and repressed. Building your whole identity on top of Hating Something will always make you miserable. Try to avoid that if you can.

I am both.

[relicsongmel]

Iris, Miles, and their mutual "secret"

The Ace Attorney fandom is no stranger to discussions of homoerotic subtext in the game's script—pretty much everyone who's spent more than five seconds here will be able to tell you that. Screenshots of lines that imply romantic tension between same-gender characters are all over the place, to the point that many fans are drawn to the series purely by its reputation as "the gay lawyer game." Some scenes are more well-known than others, but one I find brought up fairly regularly is this conversation between Miles and Iris:

This is optional dialogue that can be triggered by presenting incorrect evidence on Iris' Psyche-Lock during the Investigation portion of Bridge to the Turnabout. The argument here is that the "secret" Iris is referring to is the same as her own: that being, a romantic interest in Phoenix Wright. Which is definitely hilarious when you consider that Iris has known Miles for less than a day and she's already reading him for filth (granted, she could have been clued in by the similarly infamous "indispensable friend" line, and she's also exceptionally good at reading people despite Miles thinking otherwise). As a Narumitsu shipper myself I am not immune to enjoying that interpretation; however, I feel like there's a lot of nuance in this scene that isn't often addressed by the fandom at large. Which is unfortunate because watering it down to just Iris calling out Miles for being the gayass he is (to be fair. she's not wrong) does a MASSIVE disservice to both of their characters, and I'll explain why.

My bone to pick with the usual analysis of this scene is mostly centered around the larger conversation to be had regarding the treatment of female characters in fandom spaces. All too often they tend to play second fiddle to the male characters, and a similar principle holds true for ships with their canonical male love interests: mostly ignored in favor of the the more popular M/M ship(s). At best these women are sidelined, at worse they are flattened into wingmen for the boys (as is frequently the case with many AA girls and Narumitsu, Iris included), and at the absolute worst they are demonized for their perceived "competition" with whatever gay ship is most popular and therefore the Only Valid One for the male characters involved (as exemplified by some very "passionate" fans that I generally try to avoid interacting with). Whenever this scene gets brought up, the focus is almost always exclusively on Miles and what the interaction says about his relationship with Phoenix; Iris is only relevant insofar as she's the one initiating Miles' Homosexual Moment™—you could replace her with almost any other character and there'd be a similar level of neglect for their role in the interaction. Only very rarely will you see attention given to what Iris' question about Miles' secret means when she is the one asking it, and what it can tell us about her relationship with Miles/what she thinks of him, and vice versa (absolutely wild how even Miles himself is often flanderized despite being the fandom's golden child). It's all too characteristic of the systemic misogyny that has plagued fandom since its inception, which is deeply frustrating to me as someone who adores Iris as much as I do (if that wasn't obvious by now). So that said, let's dive deeper into what I think the missing link is here: namely, the Iris-Miles dynamic as it pertains to their relation to Phoenix.

Iris and Miles is one of my favorite relationships to explore in the whole series—but as I've described above, unfortunately a lot of people get it wrong in my opinion. Discussion about the two is frequently centered around Narumitsu Love Drama—which is a conversation worth having, don't get me wrong—but the elements at play there aren't always represented the way I envision them, which again, is frustrating. Take the idea of potential jealousy, for instance: it's pretty standard love triangle fare that can be (and often is) quickly turned into demonization when it's used in a shipping context, character assassination be damned (re: Narumitsu fanfic authors that project their personal dislike of Feenris onto Miles via his jealousy of Iris and/or how they tend to portray Iris unfavorably). However, it's not inherently a bad thing to explore: personally, I do believe that there is mutual jealousy between the two of them. Miles might not have the full context of Iris' history when this conversation takes place, but he's emotionally intelligent enough to pick up on what Iris means to Phoenix, and vice versa. And him being a jealous hoe about it isn't out of the question when you consider that he's a bit of a loner by nature and doesn't have many close friends or outlets for socialization outside of his job. The crucial element that's sometimes missed, though, is that Miles not only lacks the self-awareness to realize he's a jealous hoe...he's also a self-sabotaging jealous hoe.

And the same can be said for Iris, who is similarly introverted and doesn't often leave her home at Hazakura Temple.

The whole reason Miles is peering into Iris' heart in the first place can be found in this exchange, after he breaks her Psyche-Lock:

Miles uses the Magatama in order to gain the answers he needs to bring the truth to light and get Iris acquitted, and he does so for the express purpose of reuniting her with Phoenix so they can find closure—in fact, he reiterates this to her multiple times. He obviously recognizes how Phoenix is suffering from what happened between them (I'd argue he sympathizes with Iris' plight as well) and has resolved to do what he can to help him heal, but there's no reason for him to be so insistent that she rectify things with Phoenix when it does nothing but harm his own chances with him. Unless, of course...that's the whole point.

To convince Iris to reveal her secret so he doesn't have to face his own, because he thinks himself undeserving.

And Iris, noticing this because she empathizes with that feeling of unworthiness, calls him out on it in an almost uncharacteristically forward manner when she asks him what he's hiding.

Takes one to know one, indeed.

Iris highly respects Miles for taking on her defense despite the risk to his job as a prosecutor. She's willing to trust him after hearing he's a friend of Phoenix, hearing him out and letting him reason with her. She still keeps her cards close to her chest in some regards, but she's more honest with him than she's been with anyone else in her life apart from her sister. She sees his commitment to the truth and how it starkly contrasts with how she's lived her life to this point, and thinks that this is the type of partner Phoenix deserves—not someone like her, who only knows how to survive using lies and deception. She sees so much strength in him but still recognizes the insecurity lurking beneath his tenacity, which is why when he falters in his logic, she takes a leap of faith and gives him one last chance to examine his reasons for pushing the burden of his unspoken affections onto her, as if to say: "Look in the mirror. Is this really for me? Or is it for you? Do you really seek the truth for its own sake, or do you merely hope to find one truth so you might run from another?"

Her question to Miles is a gamble—a coin flip of self-sacrifice. If she loses and he presses on, she has to face the secret within her heart she's been suppressing for five years. But if she wins and he gives in to the truth in his, she has to live the rest of her life watching it unfold and knowing she threw away her chance to finally stop living in fear of her own love.

Either way, there's no escaping heartache for her anymore.

Miles and Iris both want what's best for Phoenix and prioritize their vision of his feelings over their own. However, they are also both deeply emotionally repressed people who find difficulty in being direct with their feelings, and are predisposed to self-sabotage due to childhood trauma. These tendencies may manifest in different ways for both of them, but the fact remains that such people would likely not compete for a person's affection in the traditional sense, which is exactly what we see with how Iris and Miles deflect their feelings for Phoenix. These selfless, lovestruck idiots toss that man around like a game of hot-potato because their mutual self-hatred for the ways they've harmed him has rendered them terrified of the reality of what he means to them, and desperate to find a way out of admitting to it. It's the most compelling explanation I can think of for why the usually unassuming Iris makes such a bold judgment about what Miles might be keeping locked away, and why Miles goes to such lengths to make sure she talks to Phoenix and tells him the truth—his agreement to defend her was conditional on that exact promise. They go through this whole song-and-dance of playing wingman to ignore their own feelings while still trying to bring Phoenix the happiness they think he deserves—and then they wonder why seeing Phoenix give the other one attention burns them up inside.

Because they’re dumb. And I love them.

TL;DR the Iris Psyche-Lock scene in BttT is so much more than just "haha Miles gay" and I wish people talked about it more. Also Iris and Miles are way more similar than they appear at first glance and if I think about it for too long it makes me physically ill thank you for coming to my TED talk

[lj-lephemstar]

Progress Checkup! (Jan. 2025) | Scratchin' Melodii Devlog

Hey guys! Time for another progress checkup; This is actually the first one of the new year! I hope you were all able to enjoy the holidays. I took a bit of a break from working on most stuff last month and have been getting back on things this month. First, I wanna thank everyone who's wishlisted Scratchin' Melodii on Steam! So far, the game's gotten over 17,000 wishlists! Thanks so much for the support!

In the previous devlog, I mentioned some changes to the rhythm system. In the Dragon Funk preview, you can see the new rhythm system and character icons I mentioned in the previous devlog! Actually, let's unpack some of the new things you're seeing in action there:

Hold Notes This is the first song in the game to include hold-notes! They mostly work the same as they would in any other rhythm game. However, since this game has an emphasis on self expression, moving the control stick during these will let you tune the note's pitch-bend for extra expression points! I showed that off in a post here. As for Pow Notes, I've been working on a way to let the player get expression points from these too! I'd like for most of the special notes like these to be not just a gimmick, but a tool that the player can use to their advantage.

Quadruple Lines Yep! The first blue line in this one is extra long and has 4 rows! Fun fact actually, I had to implement this feature after I realized that part of the song was too long to fit in just two rows. It was pretty difficult to figure out both how to do it and how to execute it in a way that doesn't feel too jarring, but I'm pretty satisfied with the results! In fact, barely anyone's even noticed it; I guess that's just how natural it feels! Not sure how much more often I'll be having lines longer than two rows, but it's great that I have the option now.

AutoPlay You might also notice that the player inputs are perfectly timed... TOO perfect... that's because I've developed an autoplay feature for the game! At the moment, it's mostly for debugging and stuff, but if all goes according to plan, AutoPlay Mode and Replays should hopefully be available to players as well in some form when the game comes out!

"Next" Indicator & Other UI Related QoL Some of the top things players said they had trouble with in the demo were related to being prepared for the next line. So, if you look at the right-end of the rhythm bars, you'll see a little tab that shows the color and amount of rows the next line will have! Also, now each line's suggested notes can be seen before the rival performs them. This did take some thought, as I actually kinda still liked the idea of it appearing as if the characters were making it up on the spot, but to put game design first, it makes more sense to have it displayed as soon as possible so the player has more time to react and prepare. This also opens up more possibilities for future mechanics, so in the long run, I think I've made the best choice here.

Now, let's get into what I've been and/or will be working on that you haven't seen yet!

Act 2's Boss The music for the Act 2 Boss is  nearly complete! I'll likely be starting to animate it pretty soon. This song is the longest one I've done so far, clocking at a duration of a little over 3 minutes long!

More Animation Updates for Stir & Mix At this point, I've done even more cleanups on the sequence you saw in the last devlog and I've finished animating the "I wanna" scene of the song, which will probably have the most changes out of any other scene in the song. When I first animated Stir & Mix, I didn't quite have the time or skills to do everything I really wanted to do with it. That scene in particular I felt was WAY too stiff and boring, especially compared to the more dynamic and fluid scenes that appear in some of the other the stages now. I'd say I'm about halfway done retouching all the animations for this one!

Refined Model Sheets I don't talk about these very often, but sometime around 2023 I started using model/reference sheets for the characters. (I might show them off someday, but for now they're staying private!) Before this point, the designs are pretty inconsistent from shot to shot, so this helped a lot with that. Recently, I've done some revisions I'm really pleased with. Their designs are finally becoming... well, final! I'll be reworking the affected characters' hub world sprites at some point to reflect these changes.

Slight Reworks for some Act 1 Songs On the sound side, Stir & Mix's vocals have been reworked again! As I've mentioned in the previous devlog, 2cada's tuning style and techniques have evolved a bit since we first started working together, so we thought it'd be fun to go back and incorporate some of that into it. We'll also probably be reworking the structure of Nami's song a little bit at some point just to make it a feel a bit more solid, which may require a new line or two from her voice actor, Meggie-Elise! So funnily enough, it seems some of the songs will have end up having TWO unused beta versions after this.

Also, a quick PSA: Please note that beta versions of content will NOT be included in the full game. I've heard people ask for them to be "brought back" or toggleable, but in my situation something like that is both easier said than done and I also just... don't want to LOL. With as many directions I can take this game, I know I can't satisfy everyone, but I can make a game that satisfies me, so I'm aiming for that! And hey, maybe other people will like it too.

I think that's all I wanna talk about for now! Thanks so much for reading. It can be a bit of a daunting task to write these at times, but I'm glad to keep you up to date on the project when I can.

-LJ

[lightseoul]

a/n. pleasantly surprised at how quickly i wrote this bit, it practically wrote itself. glad the first part was interesting for a lot of you—i love writing about psych/therapy stuff (despite my complex relationship with 'em), and ofc bkg <3 i honestly don't know where i'm going with this, but it's been fun so far. (0.8k)

navigation. part 1, (you are here)

thankfully—and to the relief of whatever dignity he had left—that interaction was short-lived.

well, it’s mostly because after you blinked at him for what felt like a torturous eternity and said a shaky hello back, he gave you a curt nod as if he wasn’t the one who just initiated the exchange and bolted it out of there without a single glance back.

that bit haunted him for the next few days, reappearing in his consciousness whenever the topic of therapy or anything remotely close to it was broached. he even snapped at kirishima when the redhead asked how his latest session went during one of their evening patrols together. it was a kneejerk reaction, an entirely out-of-proportion, aggressive response that shocked even him, which says a lot.

he should go ahead and text the guy an apology.

eventually, though, that unfortunate powwow slowly faded into the background of his exceptionally busy mind as the days went on. things got so hectic in the agency that he had to postpone his appointment for the week, which—quite frankly—is an upside to this chaos, because he sure wasn’t pumped about discussing his love life, or the lack thereof, with the jarringly knowing middle-aged lady. being able to definitively avoid you and buy you more time to forget about his stupid social blunder is merely the cherry on top.

okay, maybe the incident didn’t actually slip his mind after all.

“…bakugou-san? are you still with me?”

dazed, bakugou squeezes his eyes shut before fluttering them open, and what greets him is the very same lady against the backdrop of her increasingly familiar office, only this time she’s looking more concerned than perceptive.

right. he’s supposed to be in the middle of a session right now.

“yeah, sorry,” he mumbles, shaking his head in an attempt to rid himself of irrelevant thoughts and focus on the matters at hand. therapy is expensive, after all. “i’m here.”

that doesn’t seem to placate the woman who instead prods, much to his chagrin. “you seem out of it today. is there something in your mind that you want us to talk about?”

for a second, he debates caving and just telling her the dumb shit that happened two weeks ago, but then backtracks when it dawns on him how ridiculous everything is. what is he, a prepubescent boy? he died and survived a major war, for fuck’s sake. why is he so hung up on seeming awkward for once in his life?

even hearing it in his head is embarrassing enough.

that settles it, then. his lips are and will remain sealed.

but then his gaze refocuses on his therapist, and the sheer ‘unconditional positive regard’ or whatever the crap is called that she’s radiating becomes so palpable that it just spills out of him.

“i fucked up.”

that makes the lady frown—which, if he thinks about it, is understandable, because he rarely opens up about his failures, let alone this blatantly—although she manages to quickly school her expression into a more neutral one. “can i ask you to expound on it?”

at that, bakugou sighs, because it’s either he just tells the laughable truth or actually cite one of his actual mistakes—which he’s not feeling right now, by the way. or he can expertly maneuver the conversation to another topic, but something tells him there’s no getting out of the current subject. maybe today, there is, but it’ll surely loom over their next sessions indefinitely until either of them revisits it.

he should know. it’s happened to him too many times, he’s lost count.

with this realization, he can only sigh again.

“it’s stupid,” he preempts.

“i’d like to hear it regardless,” comes her classic, supportive response.

and so he does it. talk, that is. it starts off a bit rough—he didn’t know how to even begin without flushing like an idiot, but he managed to get the brief anecdote going. he still ended up blushing anyway—the warmth in his cheeks was undeniable—and if she noticed, she gratefully didn’t point it out. by the time he’s finished with the trivial tale, he’s mildly out of breath, having said everything in one continuous burst.

“i told you,” he spits when she doesn’t say anything for a beat. “it’s stupid.”

“i’d normally ask you to reconsider the adjectives you use for yourself and your experiences, but i think you’ve heard enough of that.”

he snorts. damn straight.

the woman then shoots him a smile, and he has to tamp down the reflex to bristle at an impending attempt to placate him. fortunately, it doesn’t come.

what does, instead, is a question.

one that catches him completely off guard.

“did you find her attractive?”

the fuck, is his first, immediate thought.

but then his normally trusty and acute brain seemingly comes to life and promptly supplies a second one that leaves him frozen and utterly dumbfounded.

yes.

˖⁺‧₊ as always, reblogs, replies, and tags are appreciated <3 feel free to drop an ask, too—i'd love to chat with you. have a nice day!

tagging. @bunnysaursushii @yawnzzzzzzzz @cholios @kashee-h @iluv-ace @lotuslovers @elarakive @sugurusmoon @napbatata @k0z3me @h0ngh0ngh0ng @honeyoru @yoongiwithglasses @hellokitty-doll @lilsebnem @tetsuukuroo @crangrapel0ver @syrhra | @kalulakunundrum @cheezemanz @gold24fish @lunaryasha

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

I'M SO EXCITED (Art is by @spliceyblues 10/10 recommend for comms) ( I did not comm specifically for this au, if the reason I bullshat for her being dressed this way doesn't work, just say the word ^^ /lh/gen)

Template reads as: Crush: Cater Diamond - She does not recognize her feelings to be romantic, but they are good friends that grew apart a little bit after her attitude shift

Club: N/A

Additional Information:

- Regularly in detention/getting written up for uniform infractions

- She enjoys psychoanalyzing people

(this is mostly because emotions like infatuation are foreign to her)

- Not in extracurriculars because she volunteers at pet shelters and babysits a lot (she hides this best she can- she has a reputation to uphold)

- Very confrontational, but only with prior observation or sound reason

What do they carry?

Phone - self explanatory

Notebook/Pen - she writes down her impressions of people and keeps notes on who interacts with who - this all ties into her love of psychoanalyzing people. She struggles to feel or identify a great deal of emotions herself, so she likes to observe what traits are characteristic of certain emotions from other people. The dynamics she observes are also fodder for the story she working on writing.

Hotwheels Car - Meant to return it to one of the kids she was babysitting

Pocket Knife(ves) - Safety, she's usually out until pretty late and she likes to be prepared.

Iron supplements - has moderate iron deficient anemia. She carries them on her so that if she forgets to take them in the morning, she can take one at lunch. If she forgot or was unable to take them for a few days, she would be much more fatigued, less aware, and less social.

Lighter - You don't need to know why she has that.

MORE YAPPING UNDER THE CUT SORRY mostly angst related lmfao

LORE AND GENERAL INFO

5'3, 17 y.o, any pronouns

Used to be an honour student/competitive with Azul and Riddle until her dad passed away

Still lives with just her mom, not in a good place mentally, for the past two years her reputation has only been getting worse as the result of her becoming more and more apathetic

Spends as much time as she can outside of the house - whether it's stalling and sticking around school or working or volunteering or hanging out with a friend.

Now that she's built a bit of a negative reputation for herself, she's given herself a taste of freedom by letting herself learn that disappointing herself and /or others isn't how she should measure her happiness - however, keeping that icy outer shell helps her protect what DOES make her happy

She has managed to keep the fact her dad died under wraps - but her secretive behaviour and shutting down was what pushed most her friends away - including Cater.

In the event someone found out about her dad, or about her 'soft side', she wouldn't really care about rumours being spread, but she would actively avoid the person I think that's it for now ^^

No Yandere Simulator ? (TWST AU)

AU Information:

This AU takes place similar to Yandere Sim but with Twisted Wonderland but Taro is Azul and Ayano is Quartz. Her goal is to eliminate… AZUL ASHENGROTTO. Yeah, her goal is actually to kill Azul and NOT the rivals. The rivals being your OCs/sonass and they have to protect Azul from Quartz and her dumb elimination plans.

More info on Quartz + Tweels info

This is an AU just for fun!! lol I just had a silly idea. Here’s a template if you wanna make your own oc into the AU (rival or not)

ALSO THEY DONT KNOW IT'S QUARTZ bc she's just a nobody girl

Bro you can tell I was hella lazy with Azul idk he’s too much

Rival List:

Romeo by @skrimpyskimpy

Shuu by @oya-oya-okay

NPC/Non-Rival List:

Elfie by @quartzelfgf

Higashikuramori Shin by @liyuviq

Jade Leech

Floyd Leech

Rizy by @rizdoodls

Yuuki by @theolivetree123

Joseph by @readsrandomstuff67

(Let me know if I made a mistake lol)

[pretty-little-mind33]

Hello! 😊 I absolutely love your latest Pietro headcanons. 💙 Only if think if it’s no trouble, (and because I love sharing thoughts with you about it) what would you think about headcanons of Tony Stark’s daughter being in a relationship with Pietro? It’s completely up to you. Have a good one and take care! 👋

~ hi! i can def write some headcanons! it helps with my writers block 💕 plus i adore stark!reader hehe! hope you enjoy! ~

• as Tony Stark's daughter, you choose your boyfriend's very carefully. they have to be a certain way to appease your dad lmao (and you have high standards)

• Pietro Maximoff starts off as the exact opposite of the boys you would usually date. you know he's the last boy your father would approve of so you keep your feelings hidden, eventually convincing yourself they're feelings of hate.

• Pietro knows he should hate you. you're Tony Stark's daughter. he pretends he does, enjoying the little game you both have, but in reality he knows he doesn't (mostly because Wanda very quickly knocked some sense into him haha)

• you both bicker and banter. Pietro constantly sets little pranks for you. harmless ones that only annoy you.

• Tony notices the exchanges very quickly and he knows exactly what's happening even before you do!

• he doesn't approve of Pietro but he wants to understand. so one day he corners Pietro and demands he explain why he's all over you.

• at this point, Pietro's hatred for Tony has dwindled, and he's not intimidated by him. he'll tell him plain and simple: "I'm in love with your daughter."

• Tony will be a little taken aback by his boldness but will smirk and let him go with a warning to be careful around you. you don't look it but you're fragile.

• one night, at an Avengers party, everything changes.

• you brought a boy from your uni class and Pietro is fuming. he can see that boy doesn't treat you right; he doesn't dance with you when you ask, or hold your drink, or tell you how beautiful you look. Pietro is angry you've chosen that over him.

• so he'll excuse himself from his conversation with Clint and invite you to dance. right in front of your date.

• you're a little shocked but you'll take any escape at this point so you take Pietro's arm and he leads you to where some guests are dancing. it's not a slow dance but Pietro keeps himself close, asking why you would date someone so pathetic.

• his tone is harsh and you're conflicted. he's also so close you can barley breathe, let alone think. butterflies erupt in your stomach.

• you bite back a snarky answer, which causes Pietro to chuckle and he leans in, his lips near your ear.

• "You don't really think that, do you, Princezna (Princess)."

• one thing leads to another and you end up in the hallway, kissing Pietro like your life depends on it.

• for the first few months, you keep your relationship secret— or so you think.

• all the Avengers know you're dating, even your dad, because Pietro can never keep his eyes off you. he's extremely protective, especially on the field so he keeps you safe.

• Tony waits for you to tell him. he can see that Pietro is good to you, so he doesn't want to risk your unhappiness by messing this up. he loves you more than he loves his pride!

• eventually, you do tell your dad and he's just smirking because he already knows.

• once Tony is on board, you and Pietro date publicly. you're like a power couple!

• you still bicker and banter, but now lovingly. you move into the same room in the tower, much to Tony's dismay, but you're an adult he can't stop you.

• Pietro likes being around you. he loves taking walks and holding your hand, or just sitting and lounging around next to each other. he usually has a hard time being still, but he really tries with you!

• you're like peas in a pod 🥺

• a very unlikely couple, but you work perfectly! and you're good teammates too! you like training together!

[velvetvexations]

Please correct me If I'm wrong, but didn't Playdough's whole beef with Bechdel trying to reframe her as a TERF start originally because escentially she wanted to prove that HOMESTUCK is somehow more deep and influencial and important queer media than DTWOF?? It was a poll thing and people where getting mad that homestuck was beating dtwof (this is the homestuck website like cmon) so Playdough started there the discourse of Bechdel being a terf to discredit her work

I have no idea if homestuck is actually that queer in it's content, but this incident made me realize something very common about pretentious cult-like groups like TRF and Tankies.

They want to find the way to parrot that their interests are somehow morally superior and more correct than other's; forcemem can not be just a kink it's actually a culturally significant political practice and forcemasc is just a transmisogynist bastard copy, transfem headcanons can not be just normal fandom shit for enjoyment they are the more correct and intelectual reading an analysis of any character that doesn't adhere to strict tradicional cis gender roles and transmascs headcanons are anti intelectual media illiterate misogyny, homestuck can't be just a popular old webcomic you still like despite It's flaws (like srly It has a shit ton of racism and ableism, it was created on the era of the internet 4chan was more culturally relevant than ever in memes mostly so of course) no It's not a pillar of queerness in fiction and media and the comics created by a literal feminists trans ally buch need to somehow be morally inferior because they're both compiting in a Tumblr poll

AHAHAHAHAHAHA SHE'S STILL DOING IT TOO

I'm sorry, but imagine having this much of a grudge over your fave losing a poll lmao lmao lmao lmao this is so funny oh my God.

But it's especially hilarious because all of what she wrote about June is complete nonsense that was never part of the text. Now let's look at what she had to say about transmasc headcanons:

Welcome to projection playground, ma'am! She's literally using the idea of "legitimate analysis" just to prop up her own headcanon. This is so gutbustingly hilarious. Does she even think it's possible transmascs could have headcanons based in 'legitimate analysis'? Considering the fact that she seems to vehemently insist literally every transmasc headcanon ever is actually transfem, probably not, right? Because she doesn't understand masculinity is revolutionary and transgressive for people who weren't assigned it? Because she's a self-centered moron?

But wait, there's more!

She's so consumer-brained and she doesn't even know it.

I love that her whole personality is structured around being the world's most obnoxious Homestuck fan who uses academic language to build a comfort blanket to soothe her insecurities and lash out at others because it's gender validating if she gets to lash out at trans men the way cis women are allowed to with cis men. Except I've never seen a cis woman do it this ineptly, or so blatantly the product of issues they desperately need to work out.

Anyway, back to Bechdel...

I know I've been ranting about this subject in a general, undirected way all morning, but I'm going to tell you that this is a problem with Plaidos, specifically, which she passes on to her audience:

They don't know what TERFs are.

A TERF has defined political views. There is a lot going on with them. You cannot take one belief or action in particular, such as Bechdel softly supporting some sex-segregated spaces, and call her a TERF when she's praxis in much bigger, material ways. It's not just about Homestuck with Plaidos, or TERFs in general. It's also about the fact that Bechdel ever did anything that had anything to do with the idea that some people are more wymynly than them, which they take personal offense to that overshadows, oh, I don't know, loud and consistent advocacy for children having access to HRT? Any real transfeminist would recognize that matters infinitely more. But with these people, that's not the issue. They don't care about anything but how badly it hurt them to hypothetically not be welcome to a shitty music festival, and Bechdel having went - even if she criticized it's policies - is basically the same as having flaunted her gender assignment to intentionally make them dysphoric.

But Bechdel supports minors getting HRT. She supports them being in women's bathrooms. A lot of TERFs have identical conversations about her.

So what makes her a TERF? Because she went to a party you weren't invited to?

Do you understand how pathetic this makes you look?

It's gross and TERF-y to say trans women as a category are jealous of people AFAB on some level but when you prioritize like this where being let into the club is the one big all-consuming deal over things like Bechdel repeatedly going to bat for minors having HRT, and they obsessively treat trans men the way they do...

Like, listen. TRFs. My friends. You're women. I promise you you're Trve Wymyn. Please get over not having been AFAB. Come to peace with it and accept that people who got what you want are on your side and are happy to support you in being recognized as a woman in spite of what was on your birth certificate. Get over it.

Just get over it.

And also get over your transfem headcanons not being any more textually supported than transmasc headcanons, losers. You're so obviously the ones addicted to seeing yourself reflected in every piece of media you consume if you have to write essays about how it's bad literary analysis to not believe in your strings-on-a-thumbtack-board shit and run down anyone else having headcanons related to their identity. You're not doing literary analysis, you're playing pretend with cartoons for children and getting upset when you see other people having their own fun without you.

One last thing:

EXTREMELY holy shit racist. Do you see what I mean? How TRFs care so much about slights to their Trve Wymynhood over all else that they say shit like this? Like yeah Michfest was basically the KKK, you're right, unimaginably stupid White woman. Remember when Lisa Vogel hung all those trans women to warn us not to vote?

[ikemenomegas]

Too cute

so my cats do this thing where they will groom each other, nap a bit, then start snapping at each other until they have a chase around the house

It was really difficult to cull this list, so I chose ones that seemed fun or obvious from my character list. The experience illuminated the separation and overlap between whumpable characters and ones you want to mess up with your own hands oop.

▷∥ Jihyun (V), Alucard, Joanne Harcourt, Kunikida, Dazai, Jōno, Sasuke, Itachi, Obito, Haku, Jiaoqiu, Sunday, Lucio, Asra, Yoshida

now, this list looks deceptively short, but as a vertical post is excruciatingly long. hopefully there's something for everyone, below the cut!

🐊 read until the end for a few extra treats🐊

Omegas who elicit cuteness aggression:

Jihyun (V)

Extremely biteable, extremely squishable, much more playful rather than passive after he learns how to put up boundaries. He's especially nice to overstimulate because he gets wriggly and does a particularly weird thing where he chirps at you, like calling you, and yes, it is very sweet because it's like a reassurance thing, but also it's a bit silly how it gets faster and more frequent the most overstimulated he is. He does overlap quite strongly with a whump factor. He is very pretty when he cries and when he behaves gently or pitifully this makes him even more biteable. Pounce on him. Nicely.

Alucard

Blonde goth sad boy aesthetic, especially with the season 4(?) outfit, makes you want to hug him. Harder. Harder!!! Squeeze him hard!! Luckily, he's very durable and tolerates this with good grace. Biting is interesting because of the whole vampire thing, which I like to think is mutually erotic if you both bite one another. He develops a bit of a degradation thing at some point, and he'll get cute and bratty if you tease him about being a needy little thing, letting you punish or goad him into compliance. He also has overlap with the whump part of the venn diagram but probably don't squish him when he's actually feeling down. Measure out the cuteness aggression by kissing him lots, it'll make you and him feel better.

Joanne Harcourt (before anyone gets stupid, when I talk about Joanne Harcourt he is of course aged up, having survived having the Earl Phantomhive as a friend and hopefully graduated from fantasy Eton little worse for wear)

Joanne gets overwhelmed easily, and whines and trembles when he is. It is exceedingly cute. Tall and willowy with a shy demeanor, luminous eyes, and lightly wind-blushed cheeks (oxford commas!), Joanne is a true English-rose of an omega in traditional high collars and never caught without gloves. If you want to be the one to mess him up with your own hands, you have to be a little bit willing to growl at other alphas who want to do the same but won't take responsibility for it. However, Joanne doesn't carry a strong "whump" factor. He mostly seems to elicit pity and protective instincts when he interacts with the worse part of Phantomhive's magic nonsense, or the underbelly of London.

Kunikida

I never said acting on cuteness aggression is smart with every omega. The first time you finally give in and just... nibble on him, I think Kunikida would start yelling "ouch, what was that for, what a degenerate alpha doing this where anyone can see" yadda yadda, etc etc, honestly a total diva about it, okay maybe you feel a tiny bit guilty, but that is what you love about him. He has a cranky old man attitude, no filter, and a tsundere demeanor that absolutely doesn't land with everyone, but it's extremely funny to make him mad, you get why Dazai does it, and in your case the more he puffs like a done kettle, the more you want to pin him down and make him yell more (he yells after you leave him covered in marks too 😈, it's a shame you're too tired from making them to do more)

Megumi

Triggers cuteness aggression and is just aggressive rip. Snappish, sullen, extremely shy when he reciprocates romantic affection (because it means confronting feelings besides justified irritation and righteous anger and self-effacement). You'd think he'd have Sasuke energy but he's more grumbly than outright lowkey hateful to individuals but does occasionally exhibit some like, aggressive puppy behavior, including the "gets tired and just lays tummy-up on the floor". He's also a little bit used to it. His... Gojo, Gojo's alpha, his sister's friends (Tsumiki knows him too well to be taken in most of the time), Yuuji, Maki... you get it. It's that cute face and "you can't make me admit I like attention" that draws everyone.

Sasuke

Unlike his glass doll of a brother, Sasuke can take some roughhousing and is used to it... from his brother, but also from Shisui and some other cousins/mentors (more on this later). He's sort of resigned to it when he first realizes his alpha is sneaking in some extra squishing or nibbling (as long as it's not so visible it ruins his image). Later though, he starts to expect it and will pout mightily if you don't roughhouse with him extoling both his behavioral and physical delights. This happens the first time during a heat and he is ruthless after, due to being thoroughly embarrassed. When you tone it down to give him time to calm down... he gets petty. Don't you think he's cute anymore! Why aren't you pinching his thighs or his butt when he walks by, why don't you "sneak" up behind him and burry your face in his shirt! Thus comes a rare moment of him sitting on your lap when you're reading and intentionally being cute and putting your hand on his legs to tell you to get on with it again.

Jiaoqiu

The first thing is he makes cute sounds. When he yawns it's like a kitten or a puppy yawning. If you rub his ears or massage behind them, he can make this high-pitched sighing sound that is so cute it literally can flatten someone. The second thing is that his fur parts are so soft he has to scold you for touching him too much/all the time, squeezing too hard like a rambunctious pup. If you look pathetic about it, he will show you how to grab him in ways that are not uncomfortable (and my even lead to something else 😉). The third thing is he is cute when he is cooking (or making medicine but we have to have some self-control). He hums to himself and shuffles in place like he's dancing when he's cooking, and he's so happy when something tastes good. He doesn't cry but super spicy things still make him look uncomfortable and there's something to be said for having to baby him while he's enjoying the pain.

Sunday

He is typically so stiff and anxious it is very difficult to find him doing anything interesting enough to be considered cute, unless you clock this behavior as just really strange and then it becomes sad because it's to do with the collision of personality and upbringing making him really scared to make a "wrong" move. This isn't the part that inspires cuteness aggression. When he finally loosens up (literally, like his tie isn't tight enough to choke him anymore if he's not keeping perfect posture), that's when this show of trust and vulnerability inspires a slightly unfortunate urge to do to him what you cannot reasonably do to small, cute animals. His alpha feel really badly the first time they leave bruises from grabbing his thighs far too hard. Sunday is scared by the cognitive dissonance of his sculpted persona not being the kind of person to let his happen and the marks being result of an unguardedness that felt so good it feels wrong now that he's out of that headspace. It takes a lot of work both with and without a partner to for him to accept the natural messiness of intimacy.

Levi

Oh boy, another grumpy old man. At this point, I think it's to do with my tastes, but I won't apologize for it! Personally, I find the grumpiness cute, like with a grumpy cat. Rbf-disgruntled Levi is just a cute Levi (can be drawn in for some mutual snarking if in public, otherwise just be near him so he's not awkward and alone), a sleepy Levi is a cute Levi (that needs your shoulder as a pillow stat). He's not so cute when he's dressing down a cadet who nearly took another cadet's head off but at least that's not you because Levi has a competency kink. He has this very alert yet relaxed, dare I say perky, way of walking when you tidy your shared spaces to his satisfaction, it makes his butt look very cute and he kind of knows it. Mostly he's the target of cuteness aggression when you're being intimate together. His face just makes you want to bite him and touch him and make him cry more, he needs to fall apart and let you take care of everything.

Omegas with cuteness aggression:

Dazai

He's someone who makes you want to mess him up. Those big pouty eyes, and soft, mischievous mouth, the lanky clumsiness all puts ideas in your head all too easily. However, your impulse absolutely pales compared to his. Dazai is someone who goes above and beyond the simply "want to bite, want to squeeze, want to pinch" of cuteness aggression (see exhibit A, blowing up an old partner he has complex feelings for's car). He isn't destructive with his Alpha, but he isn't above tricking them into situations he will find them cute or responding in a cute way. Innocent methods include trying on cute accessories and going extra cute cafes so his alpha get excited about the food. Less innocent methods include getting himself used as ransom or putting you in a situation where you experience other emotional upheaval (with a suitable catharsis of course).

Obito (and Tobi)

I mean, you had to see this coming, right? The jokester with a savior complex, ridiculously devoted to the people he loves, puts them on a pedestal. Of course he has moments where he thinks his alpha is the cutest thing in the world. And then there's this itch in his teeth that can't be satisfied by anything except for biting, or wrestling, pushing, shoving, play fighting. A non-massacre Obito tones it down a littlem but he's well known to simply enjoy cute things, small animals, sweet old people, butterflies. No one's surprised that he chooses an alpha who matches this aesthetic sensibility of his. He has ADHD so bad (basically as bad as Naruto) and one of the things he hyper-focuses on is his mate, to the point he'll have something similar to Kakashi vs Guy level fights around the village where his blood is pounding, he keeps looking behind him, grinning like mad because isn't his alpha just perfect, so cute how they can't catch him yet, that focused look on their face, ah, that's a clone, the real one's on his left. They've got him and he's got them.

Jōno

Are all of these omegas a little scary?! Scary pretty husbands. Yes. A rarer but no less beloved breed. It doesn't matter than Jōno can't see you, since he can sense changes in your moods and hear everything (rip to your privacy when he's curious). He finds it extremely cute when his alpha is flustered, if his alpha laughs quietly and no one but him can tell they think something is funny, if his alpha gets irritated by people being rude and uses their skills to fix the problem (or even if they just grit their teeth and bear it to preserve decorum), if his alpha does silly things like stockpile way too much of a favorite snack when it's on sale... He knows some of it's silly, but apparently silly is what love makes you. His version of cuteness aggression ranges from saying he wants you to guide him and mushing himself against your side and grabbing your arms too tight to fantasizing about living his life as a vapor so that he can literally sink into your lungs and tissues. He knows this is abnormal, but so is a lot about him, so he keeps these thoughts mostly to himself and limits himself to using very small parts of himself (mostly with permission) or just pressing himself as tightly to your body as possible.

Itachi

Itachi also elicits cuteness aggression, but his reaction outweighs his alpha's and he also gets overwhelmed with others offering those kinds of outbursts at him so he prefers his alpha not to do it [too aggressively]. His cuteness aggression = his feral kitten energy showing. It started with Sasuke. Itachi finds Sasuke unutterably adorable. However, itach is also very reserved and has limited attention to dispense to others, so apart from holding Sasuke all the time when he was a baby and later finding that his hands sort of clench and his teeth ache when his alpha does something very attractive (mitigated by his shuffling closer and perhaps tugging their sleeve so they scent him thoroughly and make him melty and too weak to do anything silly), he never acts on it. Even when he knows what the feeling is, it's mildly disturbing for him to be hit with a destructive urge directed at someone infinitely precious to him, so he mostly attempts to resist it. He's happy enough with a pillow to make biscuits upon if you give it to him (but he'll also be happy to do something like suck on your fingers).

Haku

Haku has a strong affinity for dark mischief and the attitude that necessity is a good excuse for any course of action. He has no qualms about an urge to squeeze his alpha until their bones creak or shaking them until they're dizzy or gnawing on them while they pat his head or biting at their neck and chest and scratching them silly until even they struggle or, or.... okay better calm down now. Sometimes his mate catches him staring at them with this rather intense look, smiling, leaning his head on his hand. Every time you ask him what he's thinking about, he says something that is either nonsensical, or simply distracting like how he spotted a bird in the plants behind you, or something embarrassing about how much he appreciates you, or some other compliment. It's disarming because he's a teeny tiny bit concerned you'll be taken aback by what's in his head. It's better to fantasize anyway where reality cannot bridge the gap.

Lucio

Lucio has a really bad case of cuteness aggression, and he's both obnoxious and loud about it. He's also kind of a wimp though so it comes across more like his typical bratting behavior and is pretty easy to turn the tables on him. Unlike some of the others, this doesn't quiet his mind and get him to back off but makes him more aggressive. If you get him into a spare room or a dark corner, or even his room since somehow the count doesn't do any counting, trying to deal with him, he just gets mouthier and mouthier until the exertion catches up with him and the energy is all worked out. He'll openly say whatever he is thinking. To others, if they were to hear, it may seem a bit scary, but his alpha treats him more like one of his big hounds, ruffling his hair, tickling his tummy, and his teeth aren't so sharp for them.

Asra

I'm pretty sure he engages in some behavior drawn from this emotion in the game. Asra's icon is a fox and his familiar is a snake, he loves twisty puzzles and causing an innocent amount of trouble. Sometimes you catch him digging his fingers into his scarf or bag and staring at you, his lovely eyes practically predatory. He's entirely unrepentant about it. Biting his alpha is something he portions out, lest they get used to it, because the cute, surprised yelp is part of the charm. His cuteness aggression is primarily contained within his thoughts, during which he will just sit happily or wriggle around in a stack of pillows while thinking about the cute things his alpha has done.

Yoshida

He already "liked" Denji so much he ***** and helped ****** and got him*******, it might be scarier to see what he does to someone he loves. Octopi often cannibalize their mates too, as he frequently reminds you when he starts nibbling on you while you're still knotted together. Yoshida is very good at blending in, remaining just the right amount of visible, but with his alpha, he likes to flirt, to fluster, to make them slightly embarrassed or knock them off balance. He likes to cling and suck bruises on your skin, mostly for him, but it's nice when someone who's looking sees it and gets secondhand embarrassment, especially when his alpha mostly looks shy and a bit pleased, like he's given them an amethyst or ruby or a mother-of-pearl to wear rather than just a bruise.

Honorable mentions:

Fukuzawa and Akutagawa both inspire semi-infrequent bouts of cuteness aggression. Fukuzawa usually tolerates his alpha's with good grace, although he feels a bit cornered if you're loud about it out of doors, he is deliciously quiet, if that's a turn-on for anyone. If you try and bite Akutagawa without warning... you'll end up being very grateful for his good reflexes. He doesn't like it much. He's afraid he'll hurt you so probably don't startle him, okay?

Satoru has a mild case of cuteness aggression, but he isn't used to touching people, so he mainly acts annoying about it when he finds you cute. Sometimes he'll yank you in and rub his cheek on you, but it's all an act, usually to put some nosey omega off. Shisui can be an abominable menace in the same vein, eating with his eyes and storing away every memory of anything that endears him since he's unused to contact not associated with either family or violence. Before he's comfortable, he'll do it the same way, too possessive to let the one he wants completely go, but knowing he can't flaunt a claim he doesn't have with anymore more substantial than his presence. Satoru occasionally does something so cute his alpha wants to run at his screaming to bite his throat, but he usually ruins it by saying something stupid. The same impulse in Shisui's alpha scares him so he does the same, redirecting them, once by giving them a literal chew toy, which was a very low moment for their ego.

Aventurine likes to annoy people he finds fascinating. It wasn't always this way, but he likes to give real excuse to people he's worried won't like him, rather than have them hate him for his eyes or his blood or his money or his unattainability or his slutty waist or any of a dozen other things he hardly has control over. When he finally is interested in an alpha, the interest is both irritating and endearing (for him). When he finds them cute, there several layers of panic suddenly embedded under that feeling, under that desire. This ratchets his emotions up high enough that suddenly he wants you small enough to squeeze in his palms, wants to strangle you with pearls, wants you studded with emeralds and sapphires and rubies like they'd made up a stained-glass window you crashed through. The world made sure he was perfectly capable of very visceral violence and he has a very good memory. He bares his teeth in the mirror and sees if he can scare you off so he can stop worrying about this new vulnerability.

Toge lives daily with the knowledge that opening his mouth could hurt his mate very badly, a fact which easily lends itself to intrusive thoughts. He could make them do anything, embarrass them by demanding cute but embarrassing behaviors, command them to stop breathing unless they're looking at him, tell them come to me and see how far they'll go to do so, beg them to put their mouth on him just so he can see that adorable, glassy-eyed looked they get when they taste him for long enough. In some ways they're nice fantasies, where he has a voice he's able to use, where the danger sealed inside him is dangerous but also, not really because it's not his mate, it's a figment of his imagination. When he sees his mate do something cute, habit denies him, but his chest aches to say something but saying anything normal could have unbearable consequences. Sometimes, when his mate catches him in the midst of these daydreams, it helps him to just squeeze them hard and purr, making some kind of noise that tells them how he really feels.

[ichbinmeltdown]

We seriously need Starscream to win

LET HIM BE HAPPY AAAHHHH (also am I the only one who has a ton of trouble hurting/killing the characters I like??? I get too attached to them and I almost couldn't even kill off Megatron in something! ... Unfortunately for him almost isn't enough, I want Meltdown to give him the Sentinel treatment. After dousing him with hot sulfuric acid and yanking out some wires so he can't get away, that is. I'M SORRY I WAS LISTENING TO TOO MUCH ANDREW WK AND ENDED UP THINKING OF THOSE SUPER VIOLENT MLP MUSIC VIDEOS)

I'm not sure yet since the storyline for my continuity is still very much a wip and I'm still dealing with this awful burnout (that's even making it hard for me to finish this SFM animation I started, design characters or keep going with a RP I started with a friend last year) but I'm thinking maybe in Memory Leak one thing that happens is that Starscream finally leaves the Decepticons for good. Maybe he ends up joining the Autobots just because he wants to fight back against Megatron- or maybe he ends up just entirely dropping out of the war and doing something else like going back to science.

That's probably how the whole war is going to end- the Decepticons' ranks just fall apart completely. Part of it has to do with the fact that they're all becoming a lot more glitchy and erratic, as well as forgetting their past (at first mostly historical events that are now lost due to Cybertron being destroyed- but even their own thanks to the corruption, thus running the risk of not knowing why they were fighting in the first place) but another part of it has to do with Megatron's corruption making him get so abusive and so over-the-top at times that even some of his own Decepticons start fearing not just for him but themselves. A few different events and uncovering historical events- not just lost from Cybertron's destruction, but both sides of the war deliberately covering things up- further sow uncertainty and eventually most of them come to the conclusion that Megatron has warped the Decepticon cause that they were originally fighting for beyond all recognition and the Autobots are really shocked to find out that in the beginning, they were actually on the same page. (Sorta like in TFOne, but not exactly. I hope this makes sense)

Anyway sorry I started going on about Memory Leak aaaah

They really did put a lot of effort into it! G1 has a lot of genuine passion behind it, mistakes and all.

I'm almost scared to keep watching it though because I've gotten extremely attached to all these characters and don't want anything bad to happen to them, but I keep hearing little bits and pieces about how this character and that character gets killed in the movie and stuff and I'm like "DON'T YOU TOUCH SOUNDWAVE OR ASTROTRAIN OR JAZZ OR BLASTER OR THE SEEKER BROTHERS OR (lists like 15 other characters lol) DON'T YOU DARE PLEASE AAAAH"

I just had a huge realisation yesterday and I wanted to share this after going through some pretty horrible stuff over the weekend: Something I've always asked myself ever since getting into G1 Transformers was "why do you like Starscream so much even though he's a narcissistic bully? Why are you, someone who is a victim of narcissistic abuse, taking comfort in a narcissistic character?" Well, I think I finally figured it out. Because Starscream is also a victim of that very same abuse. I mean, he's beaten, called names, bullied, unappreciated, abused, and put through the wringer…and he internalised all that abuse because he knew no other way. He had no one to turn to, and the few bots who did support him, he treated like dirt. Once he had that freedom and power, he abused it and became the very thing that abused him. I have no doubt he was always self-centred, selfish, had a huge ego, etc. before all that but honestly? I think Megatron's abuse caused him to turn out the way he did. I could have turned out that way and it's a little scary, some of the parallels I'm drawing with him.

@ichbinmeltdown wrote a great analysis on Starscream that I want to share here:

"Megatron was abusive as hell to Starscream. He treated him horribly, and I legitimately almost cried a few times watching it. There's an episode called Starscream's Brigade that introduces the Combaticons, and I think that perfectly demonstrates the cycle of abuse. The entire world is against Starscream at pretty much every turn throughout the series, but none more so than Megatron. Every word out of his speech synthesizer to Starscream is to berate him, and he's constantly throwing him around, beating him, even ripping out his speech synthesizer in a scene from a previous episode (Hoist Goes Hollywood, IIRC). His own teammates don't like him, and even his brothers- Skywarp and Thundercracker, going off of the idea they're brothers- just... allow Megatron to abuse him. (Not to get into headcanons here, but I personally believe that Megatron's abuse fractured the Elite Trine's family dynamic. They are still brothers and love each other, but they're all too afraid of Megatron to really... stand up for each other as they did in the past.) And Starscream seemed to just snap in this episode. He treated the Combaticons poorly, and even when teaming up with Shockwave, he subjected him to a lot of the same ridicule and torment that Megatron put him through. He failed to realize Shockwave was the one of the only bots who would give him a chance- and unfortunately lashed out at him, which ruined his chances of Shockwave ever being a true friend and ally to him. Once Starscream had finally gotten a taste of power and not being under another bot's boot, he too became the very thing that he lived in fear of. And that really is how the cycle goes- when you're finally free from abuse, it can be tempting to overcompensate and take back all the power you were robbed of, at any cost whatsoever. Starscream, like D16 in Transformers One, snapped up this opportunity."

And the sad thing is, I've seen this in real life and I've internalised some of the abuse I've dealt with too. I'm not proud of it. Like the Seeker Trine, my own family dynamic has been fractured by similar abuse. I know there's traces of narcissism in my behaviour too, and I'm NOT proud of it. Maybe this is why I can forgive Starscream for being a narc, because I can see a little bit of my own personality/attitude/behaviour in him. Maybe it's because I know where it came from, I get why he acts that way and it's not just random and out of the blue. Maybe it's because--and I know this is a bold statement--I don't think he would do some of the stuff my own family did to me (blah blah blah he's a fictional character).

I didn't mean for this to turn into a long rant, so

TLDR: I finally figured out that part of the reason I love and relate to Starscream so much despite him internalising some of the abuse I went through, is because he was the victim of that same abuse.

[iamthezip]

Who is Edwin without Charles

So I got this NGL and it took me a while to answer. I mean, I had the answer almost immediately, but it quickly became a 3000 word ramble and sparked a few side rambles as well. So I tried to pare it down a bit. It kinda worked. So, here goes...

Fair warning, lots of rambling ahead but I tried!

Who is Edwin without Charles. I have TOO many thoughts about this. Firstly, hypotheticals are hard, especially with people, because there are too many variables! And in the case of Edwin, limited data. We see Edwin in the show after 30+ years of being with Charles. We have his flashback with limited shots showing him being different and ostracized by his peers then sacrificed. We know he spent 70 years in Hell. But this flashback doesn't tell us much about him as a person, just more about his peers response and treatment of him. So his actions in the attic scene and Edwin's own descriptions of himself are what we mostly have to go off of for who he is prior to spending 30+ years with Charles.

A few things we know and can assume about Edwin. Edwin is intelligent, studious, and values information and logic. Edwin is fairly straightforward. Edwin is kind (he may not be nice, but he is kind! I'll die on that hill like Charles died in that attic). He believes he is not good with people. He may have believed at some point that he deserved Hell. He does display some ptsd related symptoms and heightened fear response to certain triggers related to Hell. I mean, 30+ years later, he's still very hypervigilant about the potential of Hell finding him. Also, he has a drive and purpose with his detective work.

As for Charles, there are four things I think Charles provides Edwin that significantly impact the Edwin we see 30+ years down the road - I don't think these four things are the only things, but they're what I'm considering heavily in this portion of my analysis. Charles provides acceptance without change (accepting who Edwin is as he is and not expecting or forcing change or masking), a connection to others and the world, SAFETY (in words and actions, Charles not only claims he'll protect Edwin but repeatedly does), and absolution (this will take some explanation, later in the analysis). I think it might be argued that Charles helps Edwin find purpose in detective work, but I think this would always happen, just maybe not as quickly or easily. Reading detective stories to Charles may have made it fresh in Edwin's mind, but I think Edwin would always seek out some self-appointed task or purpose. Plus, he does reveal an ulterior motive of building a case for leniency, so the detective work purpose would eventually come about even without Charles. But, lets remove Charles from the equation.

First, Edwin will always be kind. 70+ years in Hell after being sacrificed by his peers, he still takes the time to comfort and care for an injured and dying boy, putting himself at risk at the same time. He knew Death would come when Charles passed, he explained the light to Charles, but he waits. He waits until Charles passes and even until the light appears. Edwin maintains his inherent kindness through 70+ years of the worst place and the worst people. So I think Edwin will still be kind.

Second, I disagree that Edwin is "bad with people" but he believes he is. This is ingrained from the treatment of his peers (and possibly family) and further exacerbated by being out of touch with the times, being displaced a 100 years out of time. He asks if the women in Niko's family are prone to bouts of hysteria. This would've been common medical thinking in his time. A couple episodes later, he stops himself from using the word hysteria. This implies part of his "bad with people" is lack of knowledge. That all being said, Charles is largely his source of updated information and also a connection to others, smoothing out things when Edwin says something wrong and being a major support for Edwin being himself. Without Charles as a point of connection, Edwin may never learn he isn't "bad with people" and would become a self-fulfilling prophecy. He might withdraw more and, with no one to help talk to clients and smooth out any bumps and missteps, any error would be amplified. So Edwin becomes what he believes he is, "bad with people", withdrawn, and isolated more. He already reduces a lot of interactions to their necessary functions and would just do this to more extreme.

Third, Edwin's PTSD symptoms would probably be worse including increased hypervigilance, heightened flight-freeze response, and anxiety or possible even panic attacks. All of these would be internalized as well as something being wrong with him. Charles offers safety and acceptance of Edwin - he accepts Edwin's reactions without faulting him, ridiculing him, or shaming him. He accepts Edwin sharing as much about Hell as he does (we don't know the extent and clearly he left out details, but he did tell Charles "loads of stories about Hell"). Talking through traumatic experiences and emotions is a huge part of overcoming them and moving past them. Charles offers that to Edwin. Charles also offers safety - stepping between Edwin and a threat at every opportunity, protecting Edwin from physical pain but also coming to his defense in other ways - protecting him from the concept of Hell, the risk of going back, the idea he even belongs there. Charles shows again and again that he'll protect Edwin. Edwin feels safe! And we see this with his clothes. There are only four times we see Edwin without his armor. Twice are unwilling - pain and fear in Hell and on Esther's table. Twice are willing - Ep 6 in his sweater when he plans to confess to Charles and Ep 1 in the office when its just the two of them. Edwin feels safe with Charles and takes his armor off, even when he's about to do the very frightening thing of confessing his feelings. He feels safe. But if Edwin doesn't have that acceptance and safety, I imagine he doesn't progress as much in relation to his trauma. His PTSD symptoms may worsen or at least he stays in survival mode for so much longer.

Which brings me to point four - survival mode and Edwin finding his purpose - detective work. Again, still think he'd be a detective. I just think it'd be delayed. I think Edwin would spend a lot more time in initial survival more than we can assume he did in the show. Without a sense of safety and acceptance offered by Charles, I think Edwin spends longer in survival mode, a constant state of flight. How long would he stay in survival mode, flight mode for? Would he ever feel safe or would it worsen? You do not run from trauma. You do not hide from fear. Without something to help him feel safe, would Edwin have been as trapped in his own fear and trauma as he had been previously trapped in Hell? Charles is not the only reason Edwin moves out of flight/survival mode. Edwin has to do that work himself, and maybe 30 years later he does or has. But Charles would offer a huge support in this that now isn't there. 

Finally, Edwin doesn't deserve to be in Hell, but maybe he believed he did. Maybe, without Charles, he still does. Edwin, when meeting Simon again, says "when you punish yourself, everywhere becomes Hell." Edwin spent the season learning about himself, exploring parts of himself he didn't before. I don't think these word were always something he believed, nor was that self-punishment something he could let go of. Every time Charles or Edwin talk about Edwin being in Hell (except when Edwin is using is as a "you know nothing of suffering" comeback), they point out that it was on a technicality. The only other exception is the attic, when Edwin reveals to Charles who only just escaped Hell. We know he wouldn't have talked about Hell previously in the attic scene, cause of how Charles reacts "chuffed you got out of Hell mate. Sounds hard" and because Edwin hadn't even told Charles he was dying so as not to scare him. A hell-condemned ghost would scare most people. But, in the attic, Edwin also doesn't clarify that he was there on a technicality. 30 years later, that technicality is always mentioned, mostly by Charles. It is very clear that in their 30 years together, Charles has been openly adamant that Edwin doesn't belong in Hell. But Edwin's first time mentioning he'd been in Hell, he doesn't mention the technicality, even as a means to not frighten Charles. Possibly, Edwin wasn't so sure at that point. Possibly, Edwin believed that he belonged there, even if it was only a technicality that got him there. Maybe he believed he was destined for the red light. So, without that defender to not just his soul but his honor and goodness, would Edwin believe he doesn't deserve to be in Hell. 

Edwin without Charles is still kind, still finds purpose, but I think struggles with finding safety and with resulting PTSD, self-acceptance, and absolution, even if its just absolution from his own self-perceived sins.

[pebblesandpotatos]

Per my last post, this is how I think the LU boys approach/handle drinking.

Time: He mostly only drinks at social events or in celebration. Him and Malon will get totally hammered though on a rare occasion and Oohhh boy they are a riot to be around when that happens.

I do personally think Time had a drinking problem at some point. And while I'm not exactly sure when or for how long, let's just say it's why Lon Lon Ranch doesn't offer alcoholic milk...for the moment.

Wars: He is the most normal when it comes to drinking. He's a soldier. Of course he drinks and gets totally slammed now and again. I actually DON'T think he had a problem though. When everything was going down during the war I think he actually avoided it like the plague in case someone tried to poison him, or just because he couldn't didn't want to let his guard down that much.

It's a fun bonding thing for him so whenever the chain gets to a village he always offers to buy the older boys at least a round of drinks. It actually takes quite a bit to get him drunk but if you can it's kinda hard to tell. He's one to just get a little over dramatic about things when drunk which...isn't that far off from his normal.

Twilight: He is such a lightweight. He definitely didn't start drinking till after his adventure and the first time he got drunk was a doozy. The guy is a total mess, can't walk, and his country accent gets really heavy when drunk. Is definitely starting an arm wrestling contest and probably winning. That being said it's gotten better and he can have a few drinks now but he's not as good as Wars about knowing his limit.

Sky: Sky rarely drinks. It's not a big thing on Skylof and it's practically non existent on the surface currently. I also get the vibes that Sun would be someone very anti-drinking and therefore Sky doesn't do it and is very okay with that. When he goes out for drinks with Wars and Twilight though he somehow is not the first one to get drunk (*cough Twilight cough*) but is a total messy, love sick sap when he does.

Wild: Does. Not. Drink. At all. No amount of teasing or pleading will get him to drink alcohol. He has gotten drunk once since waking up and the experience was awful. He woke up the morning after and struggled to remember what happened and it made the poor boy panic. I also think it makes his memories/flashbacks worse. So Wild is stone cold sober and will stay that way.

Legend: Ahhh, the one that started this whole thing (as it often does cause this man is permanently on my mind). Legend is more like Time in that it's more of a social/celebratory thing for him but probably does it a bit more often. He doesn't like getting drunk though so it's rare for him to drink that much.

If you do get him drunk? Ohh boy. Oh have fun with him. Legend is basically an entirely different person when drunk. This boy is making friends with everyone. He's telling stories, cracking jokes and just being the friendly traveler he was born to be before all the trauma. He will break out into song if given the chance and try to get everyone to join him. And he will succeed. He drips charisma when drunk and its almost as intoxicating as the actual alcohol.

Hyrule: The desire to say he doesn't even know what alcohol is would be an absolute lie. Hyrule definitely drinks to the shock of the others. (Mostly Wars). Can absolutely out drink basically all of them except Wars and Time. Is the most likely to start a bar fight. Not for himself, but on behalf of his brothers. And if anyone dares try to spoil Legend's cheerful mood? Bro better start digging his own grave cause Hyrule will be out for blood.

Four: Not a big drinker. More than Sky but only barely. Each of the colors handle it differently so unless he splits it's gonna give him the worst hangover/migraine. You also never know what you're gonna get, it'll depend on which color is coming through the most. Vio turns into the biggest little shit and is probably gonna be the one getting punched for saying the wrong thing. Green is probably the one who punched him, red is passed out in the corner and blue is eating everything he can get his hands on.

Wind: Has he had drinks before? Yes, duh he is literally a pirate. Does his grandma know? No and it will stay that way if he has any say about it. However he lies through his teeth about how much he actually has/does. It's his way to make the others not look at him like the child he is. He also just loves how horrified the others are when he drinks from a flask. (It's just his grandma's soup). The only ones that have figured it out is Legend and Wild who help him keep up the facade cause they too think it's hilarious to see the others flip out

[mud-castle]

What would your Lion King prequel be like?

Funny you ask that considering I was actually thinking about it in the shower earlier. Girl, buckle up, cause I have soooo many thoughts.

I had some personal rules that was mostly to adhere to the story they were trying to tell, not the story I personally would've wanted. So that includes keeping Mufasa and Scar as unrelated, Kiros as the villain, the whole Milele plotline, etc. So let's get to it

Spoilers Obviously:

First thing I'd do is change Taka's name. Taka means "trash" which is a fucked up name first of all but second of all doesn't make sense since both of his parents love him. I'd name him either Askari, as a mild nod to The Lion Guard and because Scar could easily come as a nickname from it; Inkosi which also means "king"; or Takasa meaning "to purify."

Secondly, I'd make Taka worse. Not evil yet, but a very spoiled, manipulative brat with a soft spot for Mufasa. Taka suddenly becoming a master deceiver because his father once told him that kings have to lie sometimes makes no sense. So he's just like that. I actually imagine he gets it from his mother since she needs more character than just being good. I'd show him getting into trouble with the animals within his father's territory because of his entitlement with Mufasa often having to act as a mediator.

Taka desires and expects to be king. Full Stop. No "oh I wish I was normal and could hunt with my mother." Would he be an atrocious king? Absolutely, but that doesn't matter since it's what he's owed for being a prince. There would have to be a balancing act between Taka's better and worse traits to keep him somewhat sympathetic.

With that in mind, he never falls in love with Sarabi. He honestly doesn't care much for her. But he wants her as his queen since he's a prince and she's a princess so that's just kind of how it goes. I imagine a scene where Mufasa is trying to see his logic and he's like "but don't you think you should...idk...love... her?" And Taka just raises an eyebrow. Sarabi genuinely can't stand his ass.

Speaking of Sarabi, I'd give her some actual character. I want her to be Mufasa's opposite but also compliment him. So I'd make him very open towards new things and other animals from his experiences wandering with his parents as a cub and push Sarabi's pride and pragmatism up to 11. Sometimes he's right, sometimes she's right, but they learn from each other. I'd like a scene of them together near the end plotting and putting together everything they've learned from each other, working as a unit. I'm removing the weird super senses Mufasa had.

Mufasa dearly needs a character arc, so i'm just gonna go the simple route of him learning to stand up for himself and against Taka sometimes. he's very submissive considering he's lived most of his life under Obasi and tends to be very lenient as a result. He still acts as mediator even after the two have to run and often ends up in the middle of arguments while trying to keep the peace. Keeping his head down has kept him alive. He learns that that will not fly sometimes and someone needs to take a stand and that someone has to be him.

Also I'd keep Kiros as a cannibal, cause God knows he needs something interesting going on. He's a character who loves to play with his food. Instead of being frustrated, he's having the time of his life tracking them down to take care of loose ends (Taka and later Sarabi too). I'd move his son's death to later in the film so we have some time to see their dynamic and really understand why he's so enraged by his death.

Most major change I'd have though is adding more lions to the traveling group:

I don't like how there were already lions at the Pridelands when the whole point was that it was a fairy tale story to give hope. It's kind of weird that there were lions already chilling there, makes the end of the journey feel less impactful.

So I'm taking those lions and making them refugees of Kiros's destruction (he also has a LOT more lions than in the movie) found along the way. This includes Sarafina cause why not. Taka is fully against taking them along as some of them are injured and will slow them down. Sarabi, hating to agree with Taka, is also hesitant, especially since they're being tracked, but she's sympathetic. Mufasa says he'll take the blame if anything happens and helps them, showing his compassion and leadership.

Rafiki joins them as a healer. He's still completely unconcerned with being eaten when they meet, but he has enough of an initial use for them to be given an actual reason to spare him. I imagine Sarafina was one of the injured lions picked up and he simply says she won't make it if they eat him. Her wound is infected and she's growing slower and weaker by the day. Mufasa decides to believe the questionably sane baboon and Rafiki helps her which cements his place in the group.

Taka needs something to do too, so I'm gonna let him be the brains of the outfit. He has 0 leadership skills, but he does have a lot of good ideas. But he often needs Mufasa to actually execute it. Or worse, he needs the other lions which means he needs Mufasa to convince them on his behalf since he cannot ask nicely to save his life.

He doesn't turn into an incel when Sarabi chooses Mufasa cause wtf, but he does feel his authority slipping day by day as Mufasa shows himself to be more of a leader. He sort of "allows" Mufasa to have Sarabi and tells him as much in a bid for some control.

He doesn't betray them to Kiros cause wtf. Instead Mufasa, for the first time, gives him a firm no about something. Taka is stricken, then gets angry and careless and storms off in a blizzard where he trips and falls down a snowdrift near where Kiros is. He panics and runs, unable to cover his tracks as the snowstorm ends and leading them to where the group is heading. Taka knows it's most likely his fault they got caught but like hell he'll admit that.

Throughout the movie, Taka gets worse. More argumentative, more irritated, more angry, more insecure. He loves Mufasa, but that love only seems to be present so long as he's subservient to him. There are moments where Mufasa breaks through to him briefly, showing that he could change, but he just doesn't want to. Taka never really sees Mufasa as an equal, even if he never calls him a stray or anything like Obasi did.

Taka also gets the unfortunate experience of being pummeled and toyed with by Kiros in the battle for the Pridelands until Mufasa slams in, allowing Taka to run. Then it's Mufasa's turn to get beaten. It's up to Sarabi, with her having to convince Taka to help her, to save him. This is the singular time the two manage to work together. Putting their heads together, they manage to save Mufasa.

After the fight, Mufasa sees Taka, there's relief and gratitude in his eyes as he starts to limp to him. We see Taka's eyes soften just a bit and it seems like maybe he'll close the distance. Then the rest of the lions come to praise Mufasa for leading them this whole time and convincing them to get rid of Kiros. Taka slips off somewhere unnoticed, his pride more wounded than ever.

Mufasa shakes off the group as quick as he can, but not quick enough to see where Taka went. He finds him eventually in a cave and is wary about the whole king thing and confides in him. Taka never quite faces him, but in a nutshell he tells him that he might as well accept the title (it goes unsaid that they wouldn't give the position to Taka anyway, but it's very implied). Mufasa moves to make another attempt to connect with his brother. Taka promptly shoots him down, saying something like "you should run along, you wouldn't keep your subjects waiting."

Mufasa reluctantly takes the dismissal and leaves. Taka stares after him in the dark, his eyes brighter and greener than ever with pure envy. Then Mufasa roars and all is good.

Also Mufasa's mom is dead dead. I don't see the point in her being alive.

Also also, take out Timon, Pumbaa, and Zazu. I could not stand them.

[queervegancryptid]

Joker and I agree on one thing, I guess.

Following you and a couple other people on here has made it clear that I really need to read more comics. As a kid, I was raised in a rural area by conservative parents. Not outright abusive, mostly, but definitely not people I could be myself around, and basically anytime I was enthusiastic about something, people gave me shit for it. So if childhood was an exercise in learning to hide in plain sight in order to survive, adulthood for me has been a journey of letting myself be myself and explore stuff I wasn't allowed to explore as a kid.

It's also been a journey of realizing how much the adults in my life fully failed me as a kid. I only really understood how much their shit affected me when I first really felt loved and accepted by someone, without having to hide, and that didn't happen until I was past 30. Now that I'm able to start making moves to sort my shit out, the Orange Menace is being sworn in, so there are about to be more forces than ever invested in keeping me miserable and beaten down.

So in a very real sense, I'm scared about what's happening politically. I'm angry, too, for obvious reasons, many of which are not personal to me. I don't have to be an undocumented immigrant to think they should be treated with basic human decency, for example. I don't have to be Jewish to be horrified by people chanting shit about them. I don't have to be a target at all to give a fuck, but I'm trans, so I have the distinction of being labeled a problem and the knowledge that I'm in one of the last groups that will be defended when shit hits the fan.

But I am angry and frankly annoyed for personal reasons. And one of those reasons is that I spent my life hiding and trying to be acceptable, and when it didn't work, I thought it was my fault. I'm not perfect, but I feel like the deck was stacked against me from the start, and making it my fault was just one big scam to keep me complacent. I'm annoyed that it fucking worked so well and for so long.

The annoyance also comes from the fact that these people are living rent-free in my head and controlling so much of my life. But that's part of how they make you feel helpless, you know? You focus on all the weight they're throwing around, and you get overwhelmed by the brutality and cruelty of it all, and you feel so exhausted that you start to wonder what the hell the point even is of talking about it.

But that's what they want. I've survived out of spite before, and I'll do it again. The last thing they want is for people like you and me to enjoy anything in life and find reasons to keep going, which is exactly why you have to keep finding reasons wherever you can, in whatever form they take. So I'm going to enjoy what I enjoy and explore what I want to explore, because finding some kind of joy and good in the world when and where I can is the only way I'm going to survive all the things that are coming.

Thank you for existing, by the way. Sorry I wrote a book on here. I'm going through some stuff, as you might have guessed lol

🚨WATCH: Donald Trump and JD Vance mockingly laugh at the National Prayer Service when the National Cathedral Bishop proclaims "let us pray for the most vulnerable."

These monsters are the antethesis of what Jesus preached.

[rowan-ashtree]

Keeper of Earth

this is a gift for @riseandfallofsecunit because they drew my OCs (look at them!!!), written about someone in my OC world getting some Elemental magic (explanation of magic system here. i think that's all the context you need)

1.1k words, no CWs (let me know if i missed anything!)

this is my first time posting something set in this world - I'd love to post more if people are interested :)

🌱⚡🌊🔥☀️🌑 | 🌑☀️🔥🌊⚡🌱

You've been guarding the Vessel of Earth for a number of years now.

It's not as cool as you'd originally thought.

Not the Vessel. That thing — a circlet of vines that bloom with gemstones rather than flowers — is extremely cool.

Guarding it is what's boring.

Oh, you know it's an important job. You take the responsibility very seriously. You just thought it'd be more… exciting?

Nevertheless, you do what the Keepers’ Guild asked of you: check on the Vessel and update its History each day, stay mostly isolated, move around often, and grow a garden wherever you live.

The garden doesn't need to be anything special, they'd told you. Just something that shows the Element that you care. So you plant whatever's in season, wherever you happen to be. Currently, it's tomatoes and bell peppers, plus various herbs and flowers.

You're kneeling in the garden now, gently untangling weeds from the soil to be transplanted away from your vegetables. One annoying thing about keeping the core of all nature magic in your toolshed: it feeds all life. It doesn't make growing a garden any less work.

The small toolshed sits nearby to the garden. You've gotten better at not glancing at it every three seconds just to make sure it's still locked, though you learned quickly that the vines growing on the walls and roof need to be checked on and pruned frequently, or else they'll slowly dismantle the shed in their hunt for the magic they can sense within.

It also attracts animals, which you'd been warned about, but not prepared for emotionally. One day, you'd walked outside to see a large wildcat napping by the shed, and you'd made a strangled gasp-scream that had woken the cat. It had stirred, looked at you, then gone back to sleep.

Okay, so it was kind of a cool job.

(Still not very exciting, though. Not in the ways you'd hoped.)

You gather your tools and the small bundle of uprooted plants, and move to the second garden plot, the one where you put the weeds. Many of them are hardy enough that you just sprinkle them across the ground. A few of them, you take the time to re-plant.

Very early on, you learned that the Element of Earth doesn't appreciate needless death. It encourages the natural cycle of things, of life, death, decay, and rebirth, but the weeds in your garden have as much right to live as the vegetables you plant. So you simply relocate them, to show the Element that you care. (And so they don't strangle your basil.)

Standing up again, you wipe your hands on your pants — you gave up on keeping them free of dirt stains a long time ago — and move towards the shed to put away your tools.

When you unlock and open the door, the gentle multicolored glow of the Vessel’s gemstones spills out. You block as much of it as you can with your body and quickly shut the door behind you, even though you know there's no one around. Call it paranoia, but old habits die hard.

As you hang up your tools (yes, the shed houses incredibly powerful magic, but it's still a toolshed), you notice that the light seems greener than usual. You look closer at the Vessel. It hangs on a nail like a celebratory wreath, about the size of a woven flower crown. One of the smaller precious stones, the one that's usually colorless and crystalline, is now a deep, bright green.

Carefully (always carefully, though the Vessel has never harmed you), you reach up to touch the green stone — but before you do, it falls off the vine and into your palm.

You flinch and gasp and close your fist around it. In all the years you've guarded the Vessel, through all the places you've lived, this has never happened before.

You open your hand slowly. The bright green glow is pulsing now. Starting to panic, you think back to what the Guild told you — was there anything about the stones falling out? Have you been doing something wrong this whole time? Oh, stars and smoke, did you somehow manage to break the Vessel?

Trembling, you reach with your free hand to touch the other gemstones, even going so far as to gingerly wiggle one like you would a loose tooth, but they all seem as secure as they've ever been. You try to remember the History, if any previous guardian recorded something similar to this.

You're staring into the gemstone, flashing greener and brighter and faster, when you realize you're spiraling. You close your eyes and take a deep breath, then another, letting out the tension in your body with each exhale. Freaking out won't help anything, as you're well aware, so you try to let go of the panic, then open your eyes to try again.

The gem’s light still pulses on your palm, but you realize something — it's pulsing to the beat of your heart.

Huh.

Well, it is nature magic, and you're definitely part of nature. Is it trying to tell you something?

You take several more deep breaths, feeling your heartbeat slow, and watching as the gem's flashes slow to match.

Panic fades, replaced by curiosity. You try to project that feeling out, unsure of what to do but ready to receive what the Element wants to give.

As soon as that thought crosses your mind, the gem glows brighter, and brighter, still matching your heartbeat — then disappears.

You have a split second to be confused — until you feel something blooming in your heart, your limbs, your mind. For a moment, you're acutely aware of the world around you: the fungi in the shed, the vines surrounding it, the beetles under the grass and the bedrock far below. Most of all, the Vessel, still glowing softly, now missing a gemstone. You've always known the whole world is alive (how could it not be?), but it's more than that. It's gloriously bright, it's overflowing with energy. With all this life around you, it's no wonder the Vessel glows.

Slowly, gently, the awareness fades, but you still feel awash with the beautiful warmth of your Element.

… your Element?

You open your eyes (you aren't sure when you closed them). The dim toolshed looks the same, but you feel different. You look at the Vessel again — note the missing gem, the mild glow, the hardy vines. You reach up, touch the empty socket, and realization blossoms.

The Vessel of Earth has gifted you magic.

It's not your Element, really. It doesn't belong to you (nor does it belong to anyone), but you are a part of it, now.

You realize you're leaning against the wall for support. There's a new, tiny crystal already growing in the Vessel's empty spot. You look down at yourself. You look no different from before, but inside…

Well. Your wish for more excitement seems to have come true.

[ragnarockz]

Do you have any headcanons for Agent Vidal?

Heyy!! AND YES! Yes I do! 😤

Has a signature perfume she wears and god forbid if it ever gets discontinued (definitely something floral - light. It's almost like, if you don't stand close enough to her you wouldn't even smell it. She wants you to be close enough so that you can smell it 👀)

Always wears her hair up for work but the second she's in her car headed home, she lets it all down

Has really, really nice clothes - expensive and high quality but she always looks effortless. Even if she's in sweats and a t-shirt, you know that's like high quality stuff (Agnes doesn't get it but she's kinda jealous of how nice Vidal's clothes are)

Has a LOT of shoes (Agnes loves her in heels I mean, come ON) but I think she would surprise Agnes that when she's not on the clock and they're doing stuff together, her shoe of choice is a nice black chunky boot

Actually a really, really good cook like, can look at a recipe once and remember how to make it and make it BETTER...BUT! I feel like she kinda likes being pampered so if she doesn't have to cook, she won't (unless Agnes asks her too and then she will because uh yeah, food IS a love language) 🍴

She's very playful, sometimes too much and that makes her endearing a little

She's very blunt; even more so than Agnes and that sometimes throws Agnes on a loop (she will legit just come out at the most random times and ask/say something and Agnes has to sit in silence for a few seconds to digest what Vidal just said)

I feel like she's a note taker, she may even have a diary/journal - I think she likes to pen down her thoughts a lot

Between her and Agnes, Vidal is the one who picks most of the time where they go for date night. Agnes always thinks it's gonna be like a fancy restaurant or some black-tie affair but Vidal will be like, hey, lets go to this shitty bar, lets go for a night drive to some parking lot and hang out like horny teenagers💚

She's always cold and Agnes is always hot so she'll put her freezing feet on Agnes' (mostly to get back at her for stealing all the blankets 😂) or, she'll put her hands up the back of Agnes' shirt to warm them up...among other things 👀