#i don't know which one of those fuckers came up with the idea of making a person to solve their problems

[ramblings-of-a-chaotic-neutral]

I wasn't planning on posting this today, but this idea came to me today and I must share it! (I'm still working on my special au to celebrate two big tumblr milestones! Hopefully it'll be done by the end of the week!)

With all of the dehumanizing propaganda labelling magic users as "inhuman monsters" that Uther spread during the purge, people who are attracted to magic users are probably labelled as deviants. In Camelot, saying "yeah I'd bang a wizard" is considered completely taboo. But that doesn't stop people from fantasying about what they can't have.

This, of course, spawns a whole genre of steamy romance manuscripts featuring evil sorcerers kidnapping fair maidens and falling in love with them, powerful wizards seducing innocent princess with their dark magics, dark and broody warlocks tricking naive ladies into becoming their lovers through a devil's bargain, etc. These cheesy romance manuscripts are quite popular with the ladies of Camelot, as they have a forbidden aspect to them in both the owning of such stories and the material of the stories themselves. Plus, when you're a noblewoman trapped in a loveless political marriage, the fantasy of a dark and powerful magic user becoming enamored with them and stealing them away is quite the appealing fantasy.

To many people in Camelot, magic users become the ultimate forbidden romance fantasy, being (in their imaginations) secretive and powerful creatures who can use their magic to exert their will and their dark desires on their innocent victims.

The few people in Camelot who have actually slept with magic users don't help these rumors either, as they only add fuel to the fire. Gwaine certainly has plenty of stories to share about how much fun sorcerers and witches can be in bed with their magic, and the people in the tavern listen with rapt attention and furious blushing when he tells those stories.

But when tales of Emrys, the last dragonlord and the most powerful sorcerer to ever live, travel from the druids to Camelot? The wizard-fuckers in Camelot went wild.

Within a couple weeks, there were dozens of steamy (and VERY imaginative) romance novels and manuscripts written and passed around Camelot, all revolving around the mysterious and brooding warlock Emrys.

As people's dirty imaginations ran wild with what Emrys might be like, the general perception of Emrys became more and more ridiculous. According to some of these stories, Emrys was a seven foot tall brooding warlock whose magic made him irresistible, forcing people to succumb to his will.

Pretty much everyone in Camelot gets their hands on one of these manuscripts or hears about them. Gwaine has his own collection of them, which isn't too shocking to anyone, but, to everyone's surprise, Merlin starts collecting some of those stories too (to make sure that no one else gets their hands of such embarrassing material, but people just assume that he has some sort of kink). He even blushes whenever someone mentions them (out of mortification).

Eventually, Arthur finds out about his kingdom's dirty fascination with this Emrys guy because people kept teasing Merlin for his crush on Emrys. Arthur demands to know who Merlin has fallen for (for security reasons, of course, not because he's jealous). It's at that point that Gwen and the knights have to tell Arthur that his entire kingdom (including Merlin apparently) has been thirsting over a hot mysterious sorcerer that no one actually knows anything about.

Arthur almost blows up when he hears this, furious that his entire kingdom has been having dirty fantasies about a dangerous man who's most likely their enemy! And don't even get him started on how Merlin, his Merlin, has the audacity to be more attracted to this Emrys than Arthur himself! This is outrageous!

However, no matter how much Arthur tries to point out to Merlin that being attracted to Emrys is a bad idea and nothing will ever come of it anyways, he still keeps on catching Merlin with those dirty manuscripts about Emrys! (Because Merlin is still trying to secretly get rid of them all).

Eventually, Arthur gets frustrated enough that he'll try anything to get Merlin's attention away from Emrys. He thinks over how he could do that for a while, until one day he overheard two ladies of the court talking about how much they enjoyed it when their partners in bed roleplayed as a powerful magic user like Emrys, and Arthur begrudging came to a solution.

The next day, when Arthur catches Merlin reading a story about Emrys and blushing wildly again, Arthur clears his throat, looks a mortified Merlin dead in the eyes, and asks, "if I took you to bed and pretended to be Emrys while doing so, would that finally get you over your ridiculous attraction to this criminal of a sorcerer?"

Arthur was perhaps a bit too blunt in his delivery, as Merlin promptly started choking on air after Arthur's question in lieu of an answer, much to Arthur's annoyance. You see, as much as it would irritate Arthur to have to pretend to be another man, let alone an enemy sorcerer, in bed, Arthur had a plan.

Arthur obviously needed to rein in Merlin's lust before his servant did anything stupid (like fall into bed with an actual dangerous sorcerer), and what better way to do that than slake Merlin's lust himself? Truly, Arthur was the most generous king there ever was (ignoring his own rampant attraction towards Merlin). And once they were in bed, Arthur would prove to Merlin how great and how proficient a lover he is, and any thoughts of Emrys (or any man who wasn't Arthur for that matter), would be forgotten immediately in the face of how superior Arthur is!

Arthur mentally pats himself on the back for coming up with this genius plan as Merlin's coughing fit finally ends.

"Arthur, why on earth would you even ask that?!"

"Because you're clearly enamored with this sorcerer, so perhaps this will finally get that stupidity out of your system!"

They go back and forth like this for a while, until finally Merlin, to his own shock, agrees to Arthur's proposal. Arthur feels alight with victory for a few minutes, until he realizes that he'll have to learn how to act convincingly like a powerful sorcerer for one night. At that point, Arthur goes out to buy some dark robes for himself to hopefully get more into character, and even "studies" some of those spicy manuscripts to get an idea of what Merlin would be expecting.

Arthur barely managed to finish one of them from how scandalized he was at their contents. Why were these so popular with his subjects?! Still, Arthur soldiered on, reading more and more of the embarrassing romance manuscripts until he finally felt confident in what Merlin was looking for.

Of course, when the time came, Arthur was terrible at roleplaying as a sorcerer, but Merlin didn't mind one bit (most because Merlin was torn between laughing hysterically or being embarrassed beyond belief at at Arthur's poor impersonation of a poor interpretation of Merlin himself, so he decided to instead just enjoy being with Arthur).

And that's all for now! I'm thinking about doing a continuation of this later on, where Camelot (who's been thirsting over Emrys) learns that Merlin had been Emrys all along. Please let me know if you'd like to see that one day!

And, as always, thank you for reading through my ramblings! :D

[asherashedwings]

Hey chat, remember when I did that one charting pattern analysis on Pico and Darnell?

Well I'm doing that again. But with EVERY FNF CHARACTER.

Girlfriend

Girlfriend, shocker, doesn't really have a pattern. This is mainly due to her being featured in only one song, and it's the tutorial. If we ever get any action from her in the future, then maybe we can find something then, but for now: no pattern.

Daddy Dearest & Mommy Mearest

Okay, so they do have a pattern, and it's a shared pattern. I mean, makes sense, since they're kind of a package duo. It's kinda hard for me to explain, but they have patterns that tend to focus on the left and right notes?? If that makes sense. Good examples I can think of are Satin Panties, High, and Cocoa. Mearest more so than Dearest, but Dearest's base charts are also rather simple due to his week being so early. BUT! These patterns are apparent in his Erect songs! Namely Bopeebo. But yeah, patterns that are left and right note focused. Which -- and I don't know if this is just a coincidence or not -- seems rather fitting given the colors of those notes: red and purple.

Spooky Kids

Another set of characters that don't really have a set pattern that I can distinguish. Although, I do find that rather fitting for them. Their lack of pattern matches their rather chaotic nature that's displayed in their show. They're just silly unpredictable guys.

Monster

Okay, so Monster is just already so different from everyone else that it's just hard to hold him to the same standard. But he does have his own patterns! Namely a LOT of hold notes. Which makes sense due to the lingering nature of his songs. He's slow and eerie, so of course his charting would reflect that

Pico

Okay, so I've covered Pico before. He does a lot of back and forth patterns. .... I could turn this into a super complex character analysis that is completely just my brainrot talking but I don't know if I should go there. I'm going there. Okay, so Pico's entire character in FNF revolves around him going back on the various jobs he's been given to protect Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Week 3? Backing out of his job to rap with BF instead. Week 7? Denying his mission yet again to save BF and GF. He's constantly going back and forth between his job and his morals. And it's not always clear which is the correct option. This same logic can also be applied to Weekend 1, except it's not him choosing BF and GF over his job -- it's him choosing them over his friends: Darnell and Nene. His character is just a constant cycle of back and forths.

Senpai

Okay, so this fucker was the reason I first wanted to make a full analysis on all the characters. So, this guy I noticed, uses a lot of trail notes. And in my brain it does tie into his character and. Like. The only way that I can explain it is like. You know those videos of people arguing with misogynists, and the misogynist keeps cutting off the other person before they can make their point, and keep repeating the same thing over and over again cuz they think that's how arguments work? That's the same vibe I get from Senpai's trail notes. It feels like he's just. Repeating the same things over and over again cuz he thinks he's making a point. And just going on and on so BF can’t speak Idk. If that makes sense.

Tankman

Tankman uses a lot of stairs. I had no idea what to make an analysis out of here, so to quote the wise words of @braveboiart ; "He's a bitch and I hate stairs." ACTUALLY! That is half right. Came up with this while replaying Week 7 for this post. Tankman is explicitly shown to be able to break the fourth wall, so it is entirely possible that in Ugh and Guns, he is purposefully using an egregious amount of stairs to just. Be a pain in the ass. This would also perfectly explain his switch up in Stress. He's taking BF and the player a little bit more seriously, so he starts to be a bit more genuine. Also, I would like to point out that he also uses back and forths a ton. Tankdad canon. ALSO I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE NOTE OF A LIL DETAIL I NOTICED WHEN PLAYING PICO ERECT

Pico Erect shares charting from Stress. Realistically, this is likely just a lil reference to Stress since Pico made in appearance in that song but FUCK YOU, TANKDAD CANON.

Darnell

Okay, so I've already gone in depth on Darnell, so this is mostly gonna be me repeating myself. Good to have everything in one place, yknow? Darnell has a progression of charting throughout Weekend 1. In Darnell, he starts out almost identical to Pico's charting, before slowly transition to his trail and double heavy charting through Lit Up and 2Hot. My analysis of this was the idea that he starts out the week mocking Pico; making fun of the fact that Pico chose to rap battle BF instead of killing him. But as the week progresses, he gets more into it and starts having fun with it, slipping into his own style.

And last but not least

Boyfriend

Okay, so, surprise surprise: Boyfriend doesn't really have a pattern. But it's not cuz he just repeats everyone! There's actually a lot of moments where he freestyles, namely in the Erect tracks. But when analyzing those bits, there isn't really any set pattern. Which makes sense! BF is a go with the flow kinda guy. The charting he uses depends on what the moment calls for; what will outshine his opponent the most. I mean, his charting kinda needs to be versatile, given the variety of his challengers. So yea.

Uhhh... Hope y'all enjoyed my analyses. I'm gonna go pass out now (It is 4:36am at the time of writing this rn)

[amymbona]

if you need challengers ideas I have A LOT but rn my mind is clouded with some angsty Patrick stuff?

like it could be enemies to lover or fwb but then you get distant cuz you feel like you're falling in love and then patrick just do anything in his power to not lose you, truly anything as long as we get an ANGRY LOVE CONFESSION FROM HIM PLS <333

Honestlyyy this took me like a week to write this and I don't really like it. I feel like this topic could make up for a whole fanfic, not just a one shot. But I hope you'll like it :)

Warnings: angst, cursing,

Word count: 3,2 K

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

You and Patrick were never that close. Mostly, you were Tashi's best friend and he was Art's best friend. There were some shots and awkward hugs shared when Patrick would come to visit his girlfriend and best friend at Stanford, being introduced to one another. At first, you weren't particularly fond of his habits - mainly smoking - and the foul language. But soon, you came to understand his special bond with Art (who you've managed to grow pretty close to as a result of him always hanging out with you and Tashi) and learned to respect him as your best friend's boyfriend. All in all, he turned out to be a pretty chill guy.

Eventually, you'd got to discover what kind of a person Patrick Zweig is. Overly confident and sure of his actions but rolling eyes with offense the second someone questions his choices. Loud, a bit more touchy for your liking and definitely a bit too comfortable sharing his sexual fantasies, but above all, a person driven entirely in the direction where his heart beats.

Initially, Patrick was the person to light the first cigarette between your lips and convince you to have pity for Art's puppy eyes and show him your tits. He had played the role of a perfect matchmaker, for god knows however reason. You two would exchange phone numbers and wish each other merry Christmas a happy birthday. He became your friend. 

After the complete disaster following Tashi's knee injury, the two of you ended up kicked away like two stray dogs, portrayed as the biggest pieces of shit. Patrick, you could understand. Because some time after that, you came to discover he only set you up with Art because he knew that his best friend was after his girlfriend. But in the end, the only person who had the right to yell at him for being such an asshole was you. Not Tashi, nor Art. And you, for reasons still unexplained (perhaps for not abandoning your friendship with Patrick) were tilted a traitor by your former best friend. This was the very end of your four way friendship. 

Fast forward, college was over. You went your way, pursuing your career. Patrick's number remained in your phone and, again, you'd only text each other for important anniversaries. However, all of that changed when he called you one random evening, evidently with too much alcohol running through his veins.

"I miss you." he hiccuped, the distinct chatter on his side of the line making it harder for you to hear what he was saying. 

"Patrick." you sighed, knowing damn well he's simply drunk and thought he must have dialed a wrong number. 

But the ever so persistent individual, he kept talking. "I think about you a lot, y'know, from time to time."

"You're drunk, Patrick." another sigh escaped your pursed lips, gaze focused on applying another coat of red polish to your toenail. "Where are you?" 

"Where the fuck would I be, Y/N? 'm getting wasted." Patrick's words were followed by a fit of laughter, not sure if his own or anyone else's. "Trynna forget about everyone. Not you, though." 

"Not me?"

"Just those two fuckers."

Of course. Ever since the painful split, Patrick had his own way of dealing with things, and that would mainly include getting totally wasted and babbling crap about being so deeply betrayed as if he was Jesus on the cross. 

That night, Patrick ended up at your place, upon you picking him up from the place which was, coincidentally, not too far from your current home. To put it simply, the two of you ended up in the world's messiest and smelliest make out session, Patrick's alcohol breath enveloping you from all directions. It was a vague attempt to get him out of the skinny pair of his jeans that he mistook for you wanting to suck his dick. Almost teary eyed, he begged you to let him fuck you, that it would make everything better for both of you. That it would have been a perfect revenge on Tashi and Art for breaking both of your hearts, even though they would had no way of discovering it. 

To this day, the revenge mindset continues corrupting both of your minds, or perhaps, it just gives you an excuse to keep fucking with each other. Patrick Zweig is a frequent visitor at your apartment, occupying your bed and drinking from your favourite tea cups while spitting some lines along "That nightie looks fucking sexy, but you should take it off," or "I could bend you over that counter." 

Your encounters basically spin around Patrick tearing off whatever you're wearing and covering your whole body with kisses. He whispers surprisingly sweet nothings into your ear while his hands rediscover the curves of your body. He eats you out like there's no tomorrow, making love to your pussy with his mouth. His tongue reaches places, drinking in your sweet nectar and making your back arch and hips grind against his face. He relishes the feeling of your thighs squeezing his head until he's certain his skills might burst soon, and that is all worth it. For Patrick, everything is worth it, if, by the end of it, he gets you to cum all over his face.

"Pat I- 'm close." your voice gets broken mid sentence, hips buckling up to meet Patrick's mouth. 

"Good, baby, good," he coddles, words muffled against your warm skin, tongue circling around your clit as his pointer and middle finger keep pumping in and out. "Just let go honey." 

And you do, moaning his name, hands tightening where they are tangled in his hair. Both of you are on cloud nine - your, from the heavenly orgasm and Patrick, from the sweet delight in your strained voice.

He remains in the bed next to you for a while, holding you and stroking your hair, while the conversation slowly dies. But the moment Patrick attempts to settle under the sheets, you kick him off, insisting on having to get up early in the morning. 

"I don't get it, Y/N," Patrick huffs as he buttons up his pants, eyes roaming up and down over your bare figure while you reach for your nightie. "I make you cum so loud you might wake up the whole street and now you're kicking me out." 

"I'm not kicking you out Patrick." you mumble, sliding into your slippers. 

But Patrick doesn't buy your bullshit. "You are. And it's not the first time you're doing it." 

He seems to see right through you, to know that you're perfectly capable of getting up early and performing your whole morning routine with him occupying your bed. No. There is more to that, much more that you're not telling him. And he wants so bad to have you tell him the truth. 

"You could just let me stay here, y'know. I'm not a thief or something." Patrick continues, a half ironic smile on his face as he moves closer towards you. His hands find place on your hips and he pulls your back into his chest. "You're not afraid of me, are you?" 

Afraid? That is the lightest way to put it. Actually, you are beyond terrified, completely spooked by the idea of opening up to someone who used to be your best friend's boyfriend. To someone who's dick you're taking into your mouth multiple nights per week. And that is exactly where it has to end, that is where you have to set a clear boundary for Patrick to cross.

"Where was I ever afraid of you, Patrick?" you scoff, turning around in Patrick's arms. It almost breaks your heart when you are met with an unusually soft smile on his face, knowing damn well Patrick is interpreting this in a completely different way. 

It's not that you don't want to love Patrick, no, quite the opposite. But you know the two of you wouldn't be able to last. Despite allowing to discover each other's gentle side and showing one another unusual forms of comfort that both of you clearly needed, you two are still so incredibly different.

Patrick Zweig is the epitome of chaos. While he's all heart, he has little to no sense of understanding in some situations that are important to you. In stark contrast to your gentle life, Patrick is reckless and hazards in various ways. Perhaps it fills his need for adrenaline, for being seen by large groups of people and adored for that big bad wolf persona he's built up during his years of tennis. 

You, on the other hand, strive for a more gentle life. After all that you've experienced at your young age, you already feel burnt out, and can't really imagine the idea of shaking your ass at bars and clubs to loud music and getting wasted. What you need is comfort and someone who's on the same emotional level with you. And while Patrick can provide what you need, from time to time, you're afraid it won't be able to last. Hence the cold shoulder. 

"Then why are you pushing me away constantly?" he presses, a small pout on his lips. His gaze drops to your own, desiring to taste you once again. "Can I kiss you?" 

It pains you to refuse him. "Just go." 

Over the next few days, Patrick sends you various messages, even attempts to call you. Your phone keeps beeping and vibrating, but you keep ignoring every single attempt of his, reminding yourself that it's for the better. Patrick will be alright, you're sure of it, he always is. He'll find a new girl - in a pub, on Tinder, anywhere - who he'll fall into and he'll reciprocate his feelings. 

It comes off as a surprise when you bump into him one day in the grocery store, thinking he might be out of the city. After all, he rarely stays there, usually just coming to visit you specifically, staying for the night and then being gone for a few days. 

"Y/N." a small smile tugs onto Patrick's lips as he sees you, eyes roaming over your form and groceries filled arms. "Need some help?" 

"No, no, I'm good." with a shake of your head, you reject his advances and move forward, shoulder mildly bumping into his. Better to keep it simple. 

"What the hell's your deal?" Patrick retorts, immediately moving after you. His voice rises, earning a glance from some people in the aisle, but that doesn't concern him.

You just shrug, an expression of indifference on your face. "Nothing." 

A hand on your arm stops you and you're pulled back against Patrick. He manages to keep himself casual, the touch moving onto your lower back, so as not to draw any suspicion and he even swiftly catches a packaging of toast bread that slips from your hold. "Don't bullshit me, Y/N. You've been ignoring me for like two weeks. That's not like you." 

"I'm not ignoring you." your eyes roll and you snatch the toast bread from his hands. 

"You are, Y/N." he presses, gaze roaming all over your gruff expression. "Can't you just tell me what's wrong?" 

"Nothing's wrong Patrick, my god, just mind your own business." 

You leave him in there, standing in the middle of the aisle, surrounded by strangers and his own miserable thoughts. Poor Patrick is clueless, unable to understand what the hell he has done to you for you to suddenly cross his name out like that.

The calls and messages get even worse, he's sending you one almost every minute there is a phone in his hands, eager for every form of contact. 

Patrick: Y/N

Patrick: c'mon... 

Patrick: don't ignore me bby

Patrick: i miss u

Patrick: ur my only girl

Patrick: ... 

Patrick: i love you

He's an idiot. Probably drunk, you think when you reread the message for the hundredth time during one particular evening, eyes welling in your eyes the longer you stare at it. He surely can't mean it. 

Patrick: fuck

Patrick: ignore that

Patrick: can i call u? 

Patrick: text me pls

Patrick: i wanna see u

Patrick: :(

He's really getting desperate, considering just breaking the door to your apartment and pushing you against the nearest surface, forcing you to listen to whatever he has to tell you. And he actually went to your place, to the apartment you live in, but never went further than standing by the door. Oh, how he wanted to knock each time he was there. How much he wanted to see your face and hear your voice. 

But you never respond, never react, trying to convince yourself you're doing what's best for you both. Perhaps you are naive, a bit too much, and in reality, your treatment only results in hurting both of you. 

And Patrick can't fucking bear it anymore, so he actually musters up all his remaining courage and travels to your place once again. Marching up with determined footsteps, he approaches your apartment and knocks and knocks and knocks on the door until you eventually open it, half asleep.

"Patrick?" 

"Y/N." 

Your swift attempt to close the door ends in vain as Patrick basically pushes himself into your apartment, refusing to be shut down once again. 

"We need to talk." 

"Piss off." you respond with a mumble, voice coming out more hostile than you actually planned. With a shudder, you abandon him, not feeling like facing him at the moment. Because whatever is about to happen, it's bound to end up as a tragedy. 

"Don't you dare talk to me like that." Patrick hisses in an aggrieved manner, following you to the living room. "You owe me at least an explanation." 

You know you do. But you can't bring yourself to give him any. "I don't owe you anything, Patrick." 

"You know damn well that you do. At least look me in the eyes when I'm talking to you." he's genuinely getting pissed off by your attitude. You always used to be so adamant on honesty, believing everyone deserves some form of a gentle treatment, and mainly to be told the truth. In your own words, people don't deserve to just be shut off. But here you are, doing the exact same thing you stand against. 

When you refuse to listen to him, Patrick gets fed up. His hands grab your arms tightly - for the first time not attempting to be cautious or gentle - and just yanks you towards himself. Finally, his eyes meet yours, fully, both of you wearing equally tired expressions. It's no secret this has been tough for both of you. 

"Can you listen to me for once?" he speaks softly, a glimpse of hope, accompanied by a light squeeze of your arms to keep your attention on himself. 

"This is stupid, Patrick." you retort, eyes rolling in an attempt to ignore the sudden closeness of his presence. "Just stop. Go home or go fuck someone. Just go and be happy." 

Patrick's expression drops upon hearing your words, mentally attempting to put one and one together to fully understand what you're attempting to convey. "Why are you pushing me away?" 

His hold on your arms eases, allowing you to slip them out of his hold and step away. Almost on instinct, your palms come up to rub those two spots, not that they're sore or hurt, but you wish to wipe his touch away. "Cause it's better for both of us." 

Finally, you admit to it, wanting to, slowly but surely, erase Patrick from your presence, from your life perhaps, as you've convinced yourself it shall ease the worries of both of you. 

"What the fuck?" he scoffs, stepping closer once again. "How would that be better?" 

"Because we can't continue with this, for fuck's sake. Patrick, we can't just fuck because we feel like it and-" 

"Why not?" 

"What?" 

"Why can't we just fuck?" Patrick insists, approaching you fully. He corners you against the windowsill and rests his hands on it, caging you in. 

You stare him in the eyes, lips parting as you search for an answer. Why couldn't the two of you just fuck? You're both single, no responsibilities and no people to remain loyal to. And you both enjoy the frequency of your encounters, knowing each other's bodies like the backs of your own hands, knowing exactly what the other person loves and despises. Your main priorities are to satisfy the other one, to make sure each one of you feels equally loved and accepted and comfortable in whatever this is. So why can't you just fuck? 

"I wanna fuck you, Y/N." he presses further, leaning into your personal space, so close that the top of his nose brushes against yours. "I wanna fuck you and then I wanna hold you. I don't want you to push me away and just let me stay with you, even when you're all sweaty and messy." 

"Patrick-" 

"Don't. Just listen to me for once and shut up. Stop worrying for a goddamn minute and listen to me, hear me out when I tell you that I want to be with you every second of my life, that I want you in my arms, kissing me, looking at me and paying attention only to me. Not any other man."

"There's no other man." you interfere, eyes flicking between Patrick's to search for any hint of rationality. 

"But there's no me either." he protests, voice raising. Fat from gentle, far from soft, there's not even that playful edge in his voice anymore. There is a hint of something dangerous hidden behind his blue eyes. "And I want there to be. Are you really that stupid to not see that I love you? That I wanna be with you and be your boyfriend? Want you to be my girl?" 

"Patrick, I-" again, you attempt to say something, anything, but no words leave your mouth. Your whole mind is clouded by the sudden confession. He loves you? But... 

It all connects all of a sudden, realising what he messaged you was intentional, was nothing but the sheer truth. All the little signs and hints. All the times he held onto you, clutched your bare body against his and desired to remain buried under the sheets with you. All the pouts and protests when you wouldn't let him stay, when you wouldn't engage in normal couple-ish activities that he wished so hard for. All the subtle touches, on your back, shoulders, face, stroking your cheeks and scratches on your back. These and so much more were visible, at least Patrick thought so. These were the hints Patrick was giving you, desperately hoping you'd pick up on it and notice how smitten he is with you. 

"I love you, Y/N." he whispers, hands grabbing your face, too afraid you're gonna disappear from his grasp if he doesn't hold you tight enough. His thumbs graze your cheeks. "And I need to know if you love me too." 

But do you? Can you afford to love Patrick, the man who was initially your best friend's boyfriend, the man you first fucked out of spite and in symbolic revenge and then found yourself caring too deeply for? Are you willing to be in a messy relationship that would undoubtedly completely alter the direction of your life? 

"I don't know, Patrick." 

"You don't know or you just don't wanna answer?" 

He can see right through you, it's insane. It pains you that you've no idea how to decide, what to say, what to tell him. So you just shudder, attempting to cast a smile and ease Patrick's worries at least somehow. "I don't want us to get hurt."

"We won't." he promises, adamant on keeping it. 

"How can you be so sure about it?" it's obvious you are doubting your possible relationship, knowing what kinds of people the two of you are.

"Because I love you." 

[roxyteal]

(Jesus Christ it happened again. Mobile decided to not only publish the draft but also not save any of my edits. Pardon me if you see any appear) (Oct 30: Put context about his sobriety in the beginning, as opposed to in the middle out of nowhere.)

Today I am compelled to talk about Joe 5. It may include things I already mentioned in a different post, but those were in the tags so if any of this seems like not new info, sorry about that.

ANYWAY

Joe 5. Also this gets long so bear with me.

Joe 5 (but you can use either Joe or 5) came from a complete set copy of "Joe`s basics joke game". He was relatively fine as a person, with highs and lows. He's a bit of a snark but it's usually lighthearted. He even realized he had a problem and got clean, though... Alcohol still kinda haunts him as a result.

At some point, he and his entourage found the Webspace. On that day, they were among two others - a copy of Denied's Basics (the 10th apparently), and the 82nd Dave, who was a rogue for some reason.

Things were alright until it was mentioned that there was a pre-existing Joe and company around, and whether or not they'd like to merge with him, and so on. 5 thought that was weird as Hell and said no. But his companions said yes.

This resulted in 5 distancing from them since they're "not my friends anymore", and "I don't even know them anymore". And from then on, he resented the idea of merging, and that damned "Joe 1" for being so Goddamn happy. What's he all smiley about, he thought. The fucker.

But at least he still had his school. His empty, ghost town of a school. He quickly realized he couldn't live alone in that so he started staying in a tiny apartment, which quickly became a mess because of his plummeting self-worth. If only he'd just gone with everyone else, this could've been avoided, he also thought. It's his punishment for going against the grain. Being different. Maybe even "defective". Well shit, let's be defective. Why not.

He would have his code and model changed so that his hair would grow naturally. Somewhere in his reasons for this was needing to feel responsible for something, so he wouldn't completely fall apart. And maybe having it would make him feel better, whether about himself, in general, or both. He recalled that he considered asking his player about it in the past, but never got the nerve. Better late than never, he tried to rationalize. That's what people say to forgive themselves, right?

But the shoulder-length he requested (and wavy to boot, he didn't realize he had that...) spiraled out of control and now reaches his waist. Of course he couldn't keep up the end of the deal he put upon himself. It really needs the trim, but he couldn't be assed to try, and it disgusts him. The only good thing was how it never tangled. Game magic shit or whatever. But regardless of that, he looked like a cryptid, and he felt like one too.

At this point, his only comforts was TV, eating, and sleeping. He didn't need to do the last two obviously, but it gave him something to do, a distraction. When he ate, he could focus on the taste and nothing else. When he slept, he would stop being able to drown in his thoughts, welcomed instead into nothingness. When he watched TV, it numbed him enough to stop caring.

But even in his lowest moments, he refused to give in to his old addiction of... That. Diving back into it would truly mean the end had come. He'd rather be tortured to the brink before he had a sip again. Even now. Especially now.

He rarely ever left the apartment, kept the lights off, curtains to the balcony closed, and didn't allow visitors. He rarely ever left his bed, in fact. Sometimes he'd lie there and daydream about leaving. To where? Who knows. But this place was so painful to live in because everyone else has it great and he's got nothing so it's like... Just leave. But where?

He'd ponder it. Maybe just go out that tunnel and see where the Internet busses take him. Leave it up to fate. Maybe he'll find a nice little NeoCities domain. That whole area's so fuckin' large, there had to be a place where even 5, a worthless piece of shit, could fit right in! Yeah...

But he never gets out of bed. Out of the apartment. To the entrance tunnel. To the bus stop. To NeoCities. He just lies there, thinking about it. And nothing happens.

One day, he realized he was running out of food. The only reason he'd ever leave his trash heap of an apartment. By this point it was a matter of looking presentable enough to go out into that bright, colorful, vapid world crafted by that... Uh, mask man, and his spooky associates. Or keep staring at the dump that is 5's living space and contemplate if he could live without the sensation of eating. He still had his two other trusty vices, is it okay to lose one?

But, fuck. He loved the instant noodles. The frozen meals. The rice cups he could drizzle a little soy onto. And all the other kinds of convenient, packaged stuff. Goddammit.

So, he stepped around the trash, and next he knew, he was out the door. Fine. Fine. Fine! He'll get so much, he'll never have to come out again!

But as soon as he was outside the building, hair almost encasing his torso like a shroud, something shifted. Today's the day he's going to leave. Yeah. He'll get this done, pack up, make a pitstop to Vincent's or whatever pretentious name that supernatural son of a bitch had, flip off the gaudy building, then head straight for the tunnel. If he had time, he might even egg that fucking place!

This is it! God, it'd been so long since he was excited. Genuinely excited. He wanted to hold onto this forever.

Mood improved, he carried on with his mission. He ignored the other shoppers, checking off everything he picked up from his list. It was one of his first lessons here, because how could anyone remember everything they needed? He sure couldn't.

Things were going fine, until... He bumps into someone. Baldina. And she single-handedly became the craziest thing to happen to him.

He barely recalled the conversation, but it led to her hiring him as an assistant at her school, despite his clear lack of qualifications. It seemed that like Mr. Strobe-bow-skis, she too had plenty of people under her thumb, in numerous positions. A whole network of them.

One of which, 5 got to meet while struggling pitifully with the coffee machine, just seconds away from having a breakdown right then and there. This guy called himself, er, "I'm never"? But one word. Okay sure whatever. And in spite of 5's threatening tones and verbiage, Imnever was patient enough to show him how to use the brewer. Even informed him of how Baldina takes her coffee.

So what's Imnever's story? Oh, he teaches art here. He's more of an animator by trade, but this suited him just fine. Huh. Well, still more impressive than anything 5's ever accomplished.

The three of them became friends. He wasn't sure how that was possible, but finally he had a reason to go outside more often, instead of stewing in his own suffering for weeks at a time. In fact, slowly that poor excuse of an apartment turned into something a little more decent. It wasn't super tidy, but if Imnever, Baldina, or both wanted to visit, finally 5 could and would allow it.

It got to a point where, one morning, they surprised him with a present. A motorcycle. Apparently the two had taken his daydreaming musings seriously, about how cool it would be to have one. Also, 5 had forgotten what day it was - his birthday.

He cried. He couldn't possibly accept this. He didn't know how to ride it. He'd ruin it or hurt someone. All the classic, self-depreciating excuses he was told he was using.

But, as Imnever said, what you don't know, you fear. Once you do, you don't. Frankly that sounded confusing, and yet, these types of phrases helped him get this far, so... Just accept the damn thing.

The helmet was really cool, but he had so much hair that it wouldn't be able to fit. At long last, he got the trim he had desperately needed; up to just below the shoulders. But Baldina did it for him. Almost ironic, but at this point, who cares?

He forgot how light his head felt after the excess was cut down. It was a nice feeling.

Once he actually tried to overcome that fear of failure and took the chance to learn something, he was surprisingly quick on the uptake. And before long, he was zooming down streets in that badass chopper of his.

Maybe the Webspace isn't actually so horrible. But, thinking that, he reminisced about that day, where he was so sure he was gonna leave this domain behind and start over somewhere else. He slowed to a stop in front of Infinite School or something like that. Hm...

And he gave that treacherous high-rise building the bird, laughing manically as he drove onward. Of course he was going to stick around nowadays, but it still felt right to do. And boy was it worth it.

Life here had finally looked up for 5. Until, well... The demon showed up. But that's a whole other fuckin' story.

[nono-bunny]

Here's something to consider: Do you think Bryke were kicked out of Netflix's LA ATLA because they were toxic during the whole set? I saw an article on Instagram saying they were fired because they were unproductive, hard to deal with, and were rude most of the time. I sincerely BELIEVE that this is what happened to cause them to leave, because of how you heard all of Mike's jerk ramblings on things (Zutara) and how he and Bryan were praised for the show. I'm thinking Bryke couldn't handle the criticism and Netflix wanted something different to the story but still wanted to keep the story of Avatar intact. Which makes you think...what could make Bryke so adamant about not wanting to change anything? Was it scenes, moments...relationships? Ever since the trailer came out, everything looks fantastic. So WHAT could be so different that made Bryke act like the way they did?

Something to think about. ;)

Thank you for the ask, some interesting points here!

So first of all, I haven't really been active on Instagram since they killed the chronological feed a couple of years ago, so I obviously have no clue what the article you're talking about is and how true it is, but. Yeah, I'd believe that lol, wouldn't be in any way out of character for what I've heard of them and for the rep they've built up over the years

As much as the guests on the podcast are constantly talking about how good at managing the show they were, you also get a very real sense of how rigid they actually are in terms of listening to other people's ideas when they go against their initial ones, even if they would make the show better. Something that really stood out to me is how many times other people are credited for all of the best parts of the show- Zuko's arc being great had nothing to do with them, Iroh's personality was different from what they initially wanted, Toph being a blind girl rather than a huge dudebro (I don't remember if he was also blind or not but like. Regardless they weren't the ones to come up with the Toph we know and love at all)... All of these are things that they've basically admitted to be changes proposed by other people, which they initially resisted. Like!!! They legitimately cannot take the credit for the show's best parts, because they're shit writers- but they have a massive ego because they've been constantly getting praise for shit they didn't do for years. Genuinely they sound like nightmares to work with!!! The cavalier way they dismiss people all the fucking time whenever they disagree with them is just. Really weird for show creators imo, and the way they keep milking the franchise even though they've long since run out of any good ideas- or, really, the ability to execute them in a way that works... Those two fuckers barely worked on anything else worth remembering/noting, so they just keep coming back to the thing that worked once and wondering why they can't get it to work again- and the answer is that they were never the reason why it worked, and they refuse to accept that

As much as I love the original show, it's also incredibly flawed and imo needed many many changes to be deserving of the perfect image it seems to have, and like? I'm genuinely hoping that the changes Netflix make are along those lines rather than like... Sensationalizing it with gratuitous violence or whatever. Zutara would be great, obviously, but... Yeah mostly I just don't want Kataang, and like. I'm being 100% serious when I say that I'm gonna wait for other people to watch the show first so I know if it happens or not, because if it does- I'm just not gonna bother with it.

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

hi, are you still doing the adamsapple prompts? If you are I would like to request this please!

14. “Bet you they don’t make you sound like that, do they?”

15. “Fuck, you’re such a wreck, and because of me, too.”

Yes I am! Feel free to send in more :)

Content Warning: Heavily Sexually Suggestive, Cursing, Jealous Lucifer and Adam is his own warning.

Lucifer was seething as he watched from his seat on the couch. The hotel got a new resident staying with them, the guy was tall, muscler, had great black hair and eyes that were ringed red and yellow.

Currently those eyes were roaming all over Adam, from his face, to his chest and lower. Not even subtle about it, he was even trying to get a look behind the fallen angel. He was taller than Adam, which really was something the guy was nearly 7 feet tall. The dicks name was Jax, what kind of fucking name was that? Lucifer ground his teeth together when the asshole made Adam laugh at another stupid joke.

"Holy fuck, that's hilarious." Adam breathed as he tried to normalize his laughter.

Jax smirked leaning in closer. "If you want, I can show you what else I got. A little more privately."

Adam felt his face grow warm, he took a step back. "Oh, I don't know Jax. Huh, what's that? I think I hear someone calling me." Adam practically ran away down the hall. He liked Jax, he was fine but he still had issues when it came to more than flirting with a man. Especially if that man wasn't Lucifer.

Lucifer watched Adam go, some relief washing over him. This was one of the few times he was grateful that Adam was nervous around potential partners. They've flirted before and it's flustered the fallen angel to no end, but he's never had Adam run from him. He held back growl as Jax came and sat beside him on the couch. He lounged there, hands behind his head. "Man, I don't know how you do it."

Lucifer raised a brow. "Do what?"

"Live down the hall from him and do nothing about it. He's the finest sinner I've seen in a while."

The king felt his rage spike. Of course Adam was attractive, he's always known he was since Eden. Human, Angel, or Sinner, Adam was breathtaking.

Jax's statement gave him an idea. He abruptly stood up and took off down the hall.

Jax blinked. "Was it something I said?"

Adam sat in his room, trying to will away the tears that pooled in his golden eyes. Why didn't Lucifer want him like that? Was he really that unattractive to the devil that he didn't mind Adam flirting with others? He thought if Lucifer saw him with Jax it would make him jealous, the fucker wasn't even that funny. His jokes were stupid and he was a 6 at best.

He jumped at the sound of a knock on his door. Adam wiped his eyes and huffed. If that was Jax he was gonna - "Lucifer?" The king pushed his way past him into his room. "Umm, come in?" Adam closed the door.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Lucifer growled, eyes shining.

"Huh?"

Lucifer grabbed him and pulled him close to his face. "What the fuck are you doing with that asshole?"

Adam scoffed. "The fuck do you care?"

"I care more than you think." He smashed their mouths together surprising Adam, he closed his eyes and kissed back. He felt the vibration of Lucifer's growl and was moved to the bed, the king swiftly getting on top of him.

Lucifer pulled away and smirked at Adams flush panting form. Good. He rolled their hips together bringing out a moan from the sinner. He kissed and bit at his neck, pulling more beautiful sounds from Adam. "I bet they don't make you sound like that, do they? Thinking he has a chance with you." Another roll of their hips had them both moaning. "I want you a lot more than you think I do, Adam. You've always been mine."

Adam wanted to touch him, but when he made a move Lucifer pinned his hands to the bed. "Could have fucking fooled me."

"How about I take away any more doubts you have, hmm?" Lucifer rocked their hips together as he recaptured Adams lips, sneaking his tongue into the sinners mouth.

Adam wrapped his legs around Lucifer trying to get as much friction as possible. Fuck this felt amazing, almost better than being in heaven. He felt the king smirk into the kiss. One hand now held both his wrists on the bed and the other went to his hair at the base of his horns giving a tug. Adam arched his back, head going back breaking the kiss as he moaned and panted. "L-Luic."

Lucifer chuckled as he stared at Adam, his red eyes a mix of lust and something Adam couldn't place. "Fuck, you're such a wreck, and because of me too. Who would have thought that the first man would want a piece of the devil." He purred and ground their hips together harder to make his point. Fuck how he wanted him.

Adam couldn't think straight, his mind fuzzy with want. "Luci please!"

"You want me?"

"Yes!"

Lucifer smirked, "Then you've got me, baby." He kissed Adam roughly again, claiming what was rightfully his.

No one would come between them.

[androgynousblackbox]

Can't Remember To Forget You. 8 [Radioapple, Appleradio]

Chapter 8: Just Give Me A Reason

Alastor wheezed, so suddenly and strong, that his usual laughter came out like a agonizing hyena.

"Are you still wondering about that?" asked and then laughed even more because, frankly, that was the only thing he could even think to do in such a fucking ridiculous situation. "Oh my goodness! You just can't handle the idea that there is something about someone that you don't know about, do you?"

Vox blinked, his eyes coming back to normal. Realizing that his power had absolutely no effect on him and pissed off about it. He laughed some more until he fell to his side. There was no way for him to stop it. Everything was just too fucking funny.

"I have revised literally every footage that there was about you, even from before I came to Hell. I had talked with literally every fucker in this ring that could know anything about you and not a single one, not one, could tell me shit about your stupid ass family!" Vox was no longer sitting in his chair, flashes of Alastor's glitched out faces crossing his screen, footage of other Overlords talking to Vox, even a brief aparition of Mimzy fluttering her eyelashes. "Oh, sure, people told me about all those partners you have been showing off around" Images of Alejandro walking on the streets next to Alastor, Honey floating in the air to kiss his cheek, and other faces that Lucifer had been using through out the years, always looking up to him, always close. Alastor recognized all of them, he could even remember the circumstances in which those dates happened, but they were gone too soon for him to find any comfort in them and leaving only the anger of Vox in full display."I investigated all of them, and you know what I found? Oh, yeah, people talked to them! Some of them even consider them friends! But houses? Work? Life outside of you? FUCKING NOTHING! It's like they only ever existed to go out with you! So, of course, my very first idea is that you have all these people kidnapped on some fucking hole somewhere and take them out to walk them around whenever it tickles your fancy. You have tortured or brainwashed them so throughfully that they have their Stockholm Syndrome down to perfection, so even if they have the chance to escape they won't do it!"

"A logical conclusion to reach" Alastor cackled some more barely opening his mouth.

"My next idea is that it was all just an ilusion you made to your own shadow. We are not going to pretend now that you are above some dosage of narcisism! So you wanted to kiss your own reflection under a different mask. Weird kink to have, but hey, I don't judge! Until you appeared with a fucking baby and literally all of that was out of the window with a hole in its head. Because you aren't blonde. None of those fuckers you were with were blonde. So either you were bleaching the hair of your own infant child, which would be fucked up even for me, or you had them with someone completely different that wasn't either of them. And then" Vox grabbed the chair and stomped it in the ground for some emphasis, sitting down with the back of the furniture against his chest, "you throw at me all that fucking bullshit about having not one, not two, but three kids in fucking total and other dimensions and whatever the fuck else! So you were either high as fuck, completely making shit up, while bleaching the hair of your own kid, by the way, or you have been having an entire life fucking Charlie Morningstar!"

That shut up Alastor faster than a ballet to head ever could. He stared at Vox like he had never heard or seen anything more repulsive in his entire life. A shiver ran up his spine and he barely managed to contain the bilis that pushed its way up his throat.

"Good grief, don't say those words ever again. Have some decency at least if you don't have any dignity left."

"THEN WHAT!" Sparks jumped out between the antena on top of Vox's head, flashing in red colors. "Tell me what the fuck I have been missing! I stole all the data from that detective you ate already and nothing adds up! No one is that good at keeping secrets! Just tell me what the fuck is going on. Or I swear, Alastor, I can turn up the intensity of the lights even more and leave you there for the next century!"

"Alright" Alastor sighed as he pushed himself up, to sit on his ass again. "I think I have entertained your little fantasy enough already. I do have to say, though, you had the right idea. Something like this whole set up could have been effective two years ago. Back then, you could have totally got me and be slightly more than an annoyance. Now? You came way too late for that" added, standing up casually as he threw the blessed rope back to Vox, all the knots undone. Vox took a step back as it were a living snake hissing at him. "As for your little christmas lights? It's down right adorable that you think they mean anything to me."

As he spoke that way, he elevated himself in the air, sound the static filling the air as the lights around him flickered and blinked. It was merely for a few seconds, but Vox could still see the darkness full of sigils of Alastor whenever the lights turns off, only to dissapear the next second. Until suddenly Alastor came back to the floor and all the lights were on.

The message had been delivered loud and clear already. Alastor could have gotten away any moment he wanted to. But he wasn't doing it and he couldn't understand that either.

"And yet you are still here" said, somehow managing to get out a chuckle through his own nerves. "You could have kill me the entire time. Did the darts even do anything to you?"

"By the second batch, I just pretended to be asleep to see where they were planning to take me" Alastor grinned. "Imagine what a delightful surprise for me was to find out that my good old pal was the one who commisioned my capture. Surely, Vox must have some kind of plan here! Some brilliant idea that he no doubt felt like he could pull off perfectly! All of that, just to bring me here and basically gossip about my private life. Talk about a let down."

"Again, you are the one that is still here" Vox reached a quick hand to grab the chair and put it in front of him, as if that could work as his shield. "Why?"

"I told you, didn't I?" Alastor sat again, casually resting his elbow on his knee to cup his cheek. "I am just so bored. Sure, I could kill you right now. But you went through all this trouble and I have nothing else to do or nowhere else to go, so might as well talk a little bit. You were right in that I do love much to do that."

Vox squinted his eyes, reluctantly leaving the chair on the floor again.

"Nowhere to go, huh?" said cautiously. "What-what happened with the other parent of the kid? They kicked you out?"

"Oh, no, not at all. He didn't have to. We are just… on a mutually agreed upon break."

Vox quickly covered up his mouth to drown out the laughter that almost escaped him. At the first sound of it, the static in the air started to increase and the lights around Alastor flickered again in warning.

"I mean!" Vox cleared his throat, chuckling again. "Who doesn't have one of those, am I right! They are even a healthy part of any good relationship! A time to reflect, a time to see your other options. Completely normal to go through that."

"Oh, no, we are having none of that" said Alastor calmly. "That man can have whatever opinion he wants about me, but he is still mine. There is no escaping that as long any of us exist. If he ever tries to see other options, I will make sure they all find as quick and painful end as I can make it. Likewise, the thought of ever looking at anyone else is so far away from my mind is not even an option at all. As I said before, this is just a temporary situation."

"Huh" Vox slowly came back to his chair. "What did you even do? Forgot to clean up the blood off the floor?"

"What kind of uncivilized monster have you taken me for?" Alastor huffed, brushing his hair back. "Nothing as rude as that. I just destroyed his sense of reality and made his mind to attack him in such a way now he is convinced I am planning to kill him, any good associations he had about me entirely erased as if they never existed" He shrugged, letting his chin rest on top of his knee. "But that is nothing I can't fix anyway, so it's fine."

"Uhu" Vox made his lips into a thin line for a moment, almost containing himself. And failing in the end. "So that is why you have been eating and killing people at random all over the city?"

"What? No, why any of that would have anything to do? Can't a radio demon just want to indulge on some lethal fun for the sake of it? I told you already, I was bored anyway. Bored enough to talk to you even."

"Well, don't I feel appreciated" Vox tried to imprint some politeness in his tone as he finally let himself sat down. He cleared his throat once again. "Did you… intend to break his sense of reality? Or you just don't like that he find out you did it?"

"It was… an impulsive act of the moment. An unintentional misstep" Alastor sighed, rubbing his face as he pulled his hair back. "He was saying very stupid things. Questioning as to why I was bothering with him. Telling me I should want better things. All because he was way too stupid to realize that if I was ever spending a single second around him, it was because I already decided it was worth it. And he had the audacity to say that I was being too nice to him! Can you believe that? When has it ever been the case that I have been nice without a purpose? Too nice to anyone?!"

"Can't think of any example" admitted Vox, deadpan.

"Exactly! So obviously, that man was talking pure nonsense. And I may have reacted a little more strongly that it was strictly warranted, something completely understandable for anyone in my position, which take us to our current situation."

"That is almost an admition of guilt, Alastor" pointed out Vox with a soft chuckle. "He really got you that bad, huh?" said and immediately shrunk on himself, waiting for a response of Alastor.

There was only the sound of more static filling the air as Alastor looked to a side, a slight frown in his face.

"Like I said, it doesn't matter anymore" continued after a while. "I will just wait until the dust has settled a bit and just get back. He can hate me if he likes, it won't make a difference. We have a kid to raise after all. He is not getting rid of me that easy."

"Three!" Vox perked up. "You said three kids. One older than your oldest, apparently! I bet that there is must be a pretty interesting story behind that. Like how you two met at all and why the fuck I can't find any record of him."

"Mmmm" Alastor hummed pensatively, tapping his chin. Finally he let out a sigh and shrugged. "I guess that is as good of a topic as any. At this point there is no chance of him even remembering any of it either, so there is not much of a point to hold on to those memories anymore."

"Yeah, yeah, exactly! So tell me everything you can."

Alastor lifted his head towards him.

"I am not mentioning any names, so we are clear. For no other reason I don't feel like giving you those."

"That is… fine" said Vox, grinding his virtual teeth. "Yeah, no, that is totally cool by me! Just whatever you feel like telling me will be enough."

"Well" Alastor reclined over his hands, extending his legs over the floor in front of him. He snapped his fingers and a small black portal opened up behind him, indifferent to all the light. Vox took a second to recognize the bottle as one of the scotch of their corporative bar for business meeting. Alastor did make sure the logo was in plain view of the screen as he took his first huge gulp. "To put it simply, we married by mistake during a binder in Las Hellgas when neither of us planned for it. It was mostly his fault, I just got involved with it. Anyway, when we woke up the next morning, he said that his undying love for me would have him doing anything for me and I thought, huh, that is neat, I never had a slave before at that point, so we decided to continue married for as long we wanted to. In the way we had our first child through magical means that I discovered myself, humbly speaking, of course, and then adopted an older child. At some point I died, as you well know, and then came back, as you also know, which unfortunately did nullify the marriage because of that whole until death do us part condition, which is stupid if you think about it because at least 90% of the people in this ring are dead anyway. But I digress.

"He was still desperately, stupidly, obssesively in love with me, the poor fool, so he proposed again to get married. I didn't know why bother at that point, but I saw no harm on it either so I said sure, why not. If he ever ever kicks the buckett it will make it easier for me to inherit all his assets, so there was that to look forward to! Unfortunately he got sucked into another dimension before we could sign any document making it official. Then I was dragged to where he was, I still don't know why, so don't bother asking. I think I was already pregnant at that point? Yes, I was. I find out during another little rampage because I got so bored without my little slave around to keep me entertained. On that other dimension I happened to know another version of myself who fancied my little slave and I said no, no, no, that one is mine. He may me small and annoying and so overdramatic like you wouldn't believe, but I caught him first so you can go die on a ditch and keep your filthy paws away.

We eventually came back. But that was a relief short lived before we got captured by some powerful people. People who wouldn't listen no matter what we said."

"Heaven" said Vox suddenly and Alastor stared at him. The TV demon shrugged. "That was an easy enough deduction to make. All the cameras that tried to capture you were fried, but they all fried in direction to the portal opened up by Heaven. After that last extermination was done, you were gone for months. I thought they had killed you again, but no, that would be too nice. Instead, the first thing I hear about you is that not only you are back, you are carrying a little spawn that looks nothing like any of the partners people saw you with before" Vox frowned, lifting a finger. "Wait a minute. If you were… not married to that guy, then who the fuck were those people?"

"Paid actors" said Alastor easily, taking another long sip of the bottle. "I couldn't be seen with him in public. Didn't you hear about how small he was? Such a tiny little date was just going to ruin my style, so we paid those people so I had something to do while he was doing my betting somewhere else. You are right that they technically do not exist, because those were all just characters I made up for them to play. It made him insanely jelous too, the insecure cretin, so that is why I kept doing it. Little slaves should know already their place and that they can't dictate the will of their masters. It was a nice lesson for him."

"But you proposed to one of them? I don't have any footage of that, but there were plenty of witnesses. You used the head of some guy for it? A succubus chick?"

"That? That was just a little prank I thought in the moment. I thought it would be funny to see what the actor would do with that material and I have to admit, they pulled it off wonderfully. We looked like an actual real couple there. It was so entertaining when he find out too. We weren't married and I was already giving a ring to someone else. Hilarious" Alastor let oug a chuckle as he took another gulp from the bottle. When he finished it all, he turned upside down the whole way to get to the last drop and then let it roll away before he conjured up another exactly the same, but full. "Oh, and at some point he got hit in the head pretty badly and that is how he lost his memory of me, our life and our baby. Not our other children, though, which I guess is the silver lining. I lost my patience with him one time while he was on that state and my little slave did not look at me the same way ever since. So that is the current situation. I am just biding my time until I can fix it."

"Okay" Vox took a deep breath, putting his two indez finger against his mouth as he reflected. "So you never told anyone about your husband because… it cramped your style. What about your other children? Why keep them in the dark too? And if you are going to do that with them, why not the baby too?"

"Vox, I don't expect you to know this, but when you are a parent you care about your kids having a little thing we call privacy. Also, why I would tell anyone? Those are my kids, not yours. Get your own if you want to know what that is like. As for Artemis" said, opening the bottle with a tentacle and drinking another quick sip, "I said fuck it. I am stronger now, I can kill anyone that thinks it would be fun to mess with them. At that point I was technically a single father and my babysitter of choice had a life of her own, so my options were more limited now than the other times."

"And how long were you with that husband of yours? Before the whole dying, reviving, other dimension, which I still do not understand by the way, but let's move on, Heaven and hit in the head that made him lost his memory."

"What date is it today?" asked Alastor, realizing he sincerely had no the slightest idea.

Vox told him so and then he nodded, processing that piece of information, and let it jump out of his head.

"It would have been 86 years if we had stayed together the whole way through. Before the point we got separated the first time, it was 85 years of marriage. So I guess 85 was the final record."

"W-what" Vox pronnounced the word like he was spitting a specially thick portion of coffee in shock. But there was no coffee, so he could only stare dumbfounded to Alastor as he just drank again. "What the fuck, Alastor?! Are you seriously saying that you have been married, with kids, literally the entire time I have known you? Almost all the time you have been in hell?"

"Indeed" Alastor whispered to the bottle. Then he shrugged. "Not that it matters anymore. We never intended to be married in the first place. It was all a… comedy of errors that was convenient for me. Nothing else."

"Wow" Vox laughed, crossing his arms. "I might not be the most best guy to say this, in fact, I might be the worst one, but that is just such a pile of bullshit I could smell it from the first floor. Fucking nobody stays married that fucking long to anybody, they have multiple children together, new baby included, and give a fuck of who they are looking at, just out of convenience. Who the fuck do you expect to fool with that? How stupid do you think…"

The words of Vox got cut out when the bottle that Alastor was holding suddenly crashed against his screen, cracking it, as the rest of the liquid still left spread over the rest of his suit. Vox moved his hands in front of him, blind, mute, but not deaf.

"I don't remember asking for any review" warned Alastor, his magic hissing and twisting around him as his eyes turned into green dials that Vox could not appreciate, even if he lifted his head towards the sound. Alastor scoffed. "Everyone thinks they are critics."

Vox patted his suit and his pocket. On the front of his chest, he got what he was looking for and he pulled out his phone to hold it in front of him. His own face appeared there.

"Alright, so you don't like constructive criticism, got it!" said Vox, sneering. "Sensitive much?!"

"Aren't all your questions answered already?" said Alastor, gnarling. "You wanted to reveal the big mystery, there you have it. That is all you are ever going to get. Are you done?"

"The fuck we are!" Vox's body stand up, gripping the phone. "I know you are still keeping stuff away from me! And I will get it sooner or later!"

"What makes you think I couldn't just easily move away from here just like I stole those bottles from you already?"

Vox rolled his eyes.

"If you wanted to do that, you would have done so already."

Alastor pursed his lips.

"Fair point" admitted, his ears still twitchig. "Still doesn't mean I have to tell you anything."

"If you cooperate, I will bring you enough booze to drown out the entire Envy Ring. The best shit I can get. I can… throw a couple of low earners into the mix if you want."

"I could just enjoy both of them without your help."

"And do what? Go where, Alastor?" Vox sighed. "Just play nice with me and I can play nice back."

Alastor rolled his eyes and laid on the floor made entirely of light destined to weak him, completely useless for it.

"Yeah, fine" said finally the voice of the radio demon. "I have some spare time I can waste. Just keep those bottles and bodies coming and I might, I repeat, might feel generous. And Vox" called without changing positions, just when Vox was turning away towards the door.

"What?"

"He was never jelous of you. Despite how obvious you have always been about me. You never represented any kind of threat to bother with."

"Fuck you."

With that, Vox got out and Alastor closed his eyes. One snape of fingers later, he had another bottle to hold. In a few minutes, the door would open up again to bring him even more. The lights blasting through his eyelids at every second, not giving him any peace, were also a nice distraction.

Everyone at the hotel was treated to a similar sounds. That being the crying of a baby as Lucifer was trying to comfort them, all the while preparing baby formula.

"Argh, again?" groaned Angel as the rest of the resident came with him. "If I ever said I wanted children, forget about it."

Lucifer pouted as he still rocked little Artemis, letting their little lungs out afainst his shoulder.

"To think they used to laugh so easily before" sighed almost to himself, kissing the blonde head.

The rest of the presents resigned themselves to sit at the table. Most of them tried to ignore the noise, while others were trying to cover their ears whatever ways they could as they tried to start breakfast.

"You know why they are in distress, papa" Charlie sighed, taking over the preparing the baby formula so Lucifer could use both hands with Artemis to rock them.

"I know, but don't look at me! I am not the one who went up and left my baby after my little attempt against someone failed!" Lucifer protested, making kissy faces to Artemis, with very little effect. "It's okay, little buddy, it's okay."

"Yeah, because he is toootally going to enjoy staying at the place where someone is convinced that he wants to murder you or whatever" couldn't help to add Charlie, before shaking her head as he went on to prepare the bottle. "I don't know why I bother."

Lucifer frowned at her briefly as he sat in one of the chairs, making appear some tea for him.

"Really shows the signs of a innocent man, huh? Running away as soon you got find out. I think you are forgetting that I am not the one who kicked him out, honey. I was willing to let him stay and maintain a healthy distance while keeping him monitored so he wouldn't try any other shit against anyone else. Instead, the guy just left. Was I supposed to stop him?"

Charlie groaned. Vaggie came up to her and rubbed her back, which did relaxed her a bit. She finished with the bottle, tested it out that it wasn't too hot, exactly as Alastor taught her, and only then went to give it to Lucifer without another word. Lucifer hold it with magic for Artemis to drink and they all collectively sighed at once when the baby actually drank, their crying done for the moment.

"Sir" said Husk with a profound, deep sigh, uncovering his ears. "I am literally the last person in Hell that is ever going to advocate for that guy's good heart. But even I think you might have the wrong impression over what happened."

"Yeah, that really wasn't I am going to murder you clothing or make up, your Majesty. That would have been even hotter" commented Angel, shoving a spoonful of cereal into his mouth. "A lot more cleavage."

Lucifer frowned again, this time not really directed at Husk, as he rubbed one of his temples. First a pressure of the finger, but then holding his knuckles against his chins as his brow furrowed.

"Why is everyone acting as if this my fault?"

"It's not" said Emily, sitting next to him to squeeze his shoulder. "It's really not. Forget about it, papa. We all just wants what is best for Artemis."

"And I don't?"

"Of course you do. Nobody doubts that" Emily gave him a little smile. "Let's not fight, please?"

Lucifer let his shoulders fall.

"Yeah. Sure, honey" said, squeezing her hand back.

Sooner than later, the whole bottle of Artemis was empty. Before Lucifer could do anything about it, the baby moved their head out the way and renewed their crying as if never stopped. For everyone's collective displeasure.

"Hey, buddy, how about a little walk around the garden, huh?" Lucifer stand up, rocking them again as he walked to the door. "Let's see the pretty flowers. Would you like that? Pretty flowers, all for my pretty little rascal. Come on. Maybe this time you can have a nap that lasts more than one hour! Wouldn't that be something?"

As soon they were both out of there, they all relaxed again as the cries of Artemis got lost. Charlie cleared her throat, holding onto her mug.

"I finally contacted dad" said, before taking a sip.

Emily immediately straighten up in her chair, looking at her.

"You did? What did he say? Is he okay? Does he needs us to go pick him up?"

"Not… really" Charlie pursed her lips. Vaggie took her other hand over the table and locked their fingers together. "He… was still killing people. And I think he was a little drunk. He only calls me Charlotte when he is drunk."

"But was he okay?" insisted Emily. Charlie exchanged a look with her until she turned away. "Stupid question, I know."

"He said he doesn't plan to keep away forever" continued on Charlie. "I don't know how much time that means. It could be a week, it could be a month. Maybe more? But he kept insisting that we shouldn't worried about him."

"That is comforting" let out Emily with a scoff. "So we are supposed to just wait around until he decides to come back on his own?"

"I don't know what else we could do" Charlie shrugged with a pained expression. "We can't force him to come back and papa is not going to do it either. I already tried. It only gave him a migraine and Artemis wouldn't stop crying."

"Maybe there is something else we could do here?" said Vaggie. "What did Stolas or Vassago said?"

"No news from them either. They just think that if the contact with each other's magic was the thing to work the first time, then it could do it again. But dad kinda would need to be here for his magic to be present at all" She sighed, taking another sip.

Emily tilted her head contemplating her hand. When Charlie put her mug down, she reached over to take it on her, her thumb running over the red tips.

"His magic" she whispered and then smacked her own forehead. "It's so obvious! Why I didn't think about it sooner!"

"Emily" called Charlie with a frown, concerned and confused at the same time.

"Charlie, you have papa's magic all over you! You were made from it!" Emily's eyes twinkled with her revelation. "We don't need him, we have you already!"

--

Vox lifted his sleeve to look at his watch. It had been already give minutes since he heard the last scream. He could only assume that Alastor had finally finished with their interns. Clearing his throat before preparing his winning smile, he opened up.

"Hello! Everything going well here?" asked, just as something he couldn't tell what it was got unstuck from the door and slipped to the floor. "I see you have kept yourself busy" commented with a little tilt, walking over various body parts. Alastor was back at the center of the lights, making a head roll with his hand while drinking with his other. The white lights were still blinding, but now there were some splashes of blood to give them a red tint and points where the lights was coming from under the body parts.

"They were not as tender as I expected" commented Alastor, lifting the head by the hair, looking at the two black holes where eyes used to be. "They were all scared even before I did anything to them. Scared, but not surprised. I could only imagine the kind of treatment your employees get on the regular for that to happen."

"It's a tough business out there. They knew the consequences the moment they ever solicited work here. If not, then, well, you can't do anything against pure idiocy" commented Vox without any shame, picking up his chair, that miracously only had a few drops of blood in the back and sitting in front of im. "So, how was the drink?"

"Passable" Alastor threw away the head and took another gulp, passing it down with a shrug. "My husband can create better ones."

"You have said that about the last option too. That one costs more than the entire neighborhod where your lived" Vox pointed through gritted virtual teeth. Seeing as Alastor did not react to his comment, he took a breath and let it go. "Quite the development that you are back refering to him as your husband instead of your little slave. I thought dead did you part already?"

"I was dead from the start, obviously that doesn't count" explained Alastor with an sneer. "I never signed any divorce papers, so he is still my husband. Whether he sees it like that or not is irrelevant. It doesn't change the facts."

"Makes sense" said Vox with perfectly agreeable grin. "So, now that you have taken your meal and insulted my selection of drinks, again, do you feel like talking to me about the whole another dimension thing?"

"What is there to talk about? We never found out how it happened or how I end up there. My husband tried to come back, but was unabled to do so. I got bored so I joined him on a whim. He told me about how miserable he was without me, about how he needed me there, about how he needed pills to cope with my abscence and, honestly, I don't know how I didn't die a third time of laughter at how pathetically that tiny man kept insisting he could barely keep on without me. Clearly, keep some semblance of self respect was never one of his priorities. But that is what made him so obedient, I guess" He shrugged again, taking another long sip.

"How did you join him into that other dimension? You had to know the way for it to be on a whim, surely."

"I got lucky. All was completely intentional, of course. It was all part of my plan to get our life back in track again and so he could continue to follow my command. Away from that other weaker version of me who thought he could watch what was mine. I obviously succedeeded in the end so it was the right decision from my part."

"But how did you get there?" insisted Vox when Alastor finished the bottle, letting it roll away from him.

"That was so long ago, my memory is a little fuzzy still" Alastor laid back against the floor, using his hands as a pillow and crossing his legs. Like he didn't had no rush at all. "Maybe next time bring less terrified prey to see if we can unlock something."

"Duly noted" Vox said, actually making a note for later in his system. "Well, what about the children then?"

"What about them?"

"I don't know, anything! Do you have any favorites? Do they actually like you? How old are they?"

"Do I have any…" Alastor lifted himself on his arms, glaring at him. "What kind of parent do you think I am? Of course there are no favorites. They are all my fawn so they are all perfect, strong, smart and delightful in every way. You would be so lucky to even get to be in the same room as any of them. Favorites. Really showing your own family issues right there, Vox."

"Even the adopted one? That one you didn't had anything to do with their creation."

"Why do you think I adopted them in the first place?" Alastor huffed, laying back. "It was my decision, after all. One of the best I ever made. They are brilliant. It was thanks to them that we managed to get back."

"I thought you didn't remember how it happened."

"I know they were involved and are smarter than you for it."

"Mature."

"Shut up."

Vox sighed deeply and started to stand up, giving that first encounter into a waste, when Alastor talked again.

"Vox, when was the last time you made a deal?"

"Random question, but okay" Vox sat again, crossing his arms as he looked in his own memory. "Yesterday I think? To arrange the contract of some actor for a reality show. Why?"

"Just curious. I don't remember the last time I made one."

Vox snorted a little, before he could hide it under a polite cough when he felt the black eyes of Alastor sending him daggers. An Overlord admitting they haven't made a deal in a while was like a painter saying they had forgotten what was like to hold a brush.

"Well" Vox fixed his bowtie unconsciously, regaining his composure. "You did had quite the journey for what you very vaguely have implied. I can't imagine that up there in Heaven you would be given lots of chances to do one. I am sure it will come back to you."

"I didn't mean that I don't know how" remarked Alastor, with an irritated note. "I feel like I could have strike one with any of your little internet to convince them to kill and prepare their coworkers for me. That is the thing about reaching the positions that we have, Vox. You never can forget that instictive need of looking out for your best interest and waiting for the better angle that best benefit you. We are like vultures in that way. Waiting to smell the tiniest bit of weakness in our prey before jumping down to take as much we can before anyone else does. We take advantage of the worst moments or impulses of the people we met. Their problems, their struggles, they are anything but amusing if not useful. Deals are how we obtain our power after all. A careful web of favors and moving pieces that we operate with every handshake, by repeating over and over that people can trust us, that it's for their own wellbeing too. They are easy for us. Absurbidly so."

"Okay?" said Vox, with no clue where any of that was going.

"Have you ever had an issue with it, though? Maybe a prey that you can't bring yourself to extend your hand to? Even if you know is the best thing for the two of you and it wouldn't bring any negative consequences whatsoever?"

"Mmm" Vox barely had to think about it at all, but he made a show of considering it anyway. "Nope. Can't think why or how I wouldn't just do it. For what you describe, it sounds like I would have to be pretty stupid to let pass an oportunity like that one. Why?" added with a chuckle, barely containing himself. "You failed into making one? You?"

"To fail you would have to try in the first place, Vox, and I never did" Alastor sighed thought his nose, covering his eyes with his forearm. "In order to make a deal I would have to see them as another fool to be used. I didn't want to do that, not even for a second, so I didn't. I let hundreds of moment of weaknesses pass by without even thinking in how to use it, even though I had a lifetime practicing that art."

"Was your little slave husband the one you didn't made the deal with?" asked Vox. The silence of Alastor, even the total abscence of his static in the air, was all the answer he needed. "Then you cared about him, you idiot."

For a glorious moment nothing happened after he said those words and Vox started to relax again, lifting himself up.

"That is so stupid" finally came out of Alastor, who started to laugh. "So genuinely stupid. The deal was supposed to fix things. He would have thank me for it after."

"Well, but you said it" Vox shrugged. "You only made deals thinking about you, about what you needed. They are not usually made to think about the other like an equal."

Alastor's cackle filled the entire room. Vox took out his phone to order a cleaning crew.

"There, there" cooed Lucifer gently, gently rubbing the chest of little Artemis as their cries finally started to die down. "Crying all the time is really exhausting, isn't it? You don't have to tell me twice, little rascal."

He sat on a bench near a bush of flowers who all blinked at him and sighed. A small whimper came out of his baby and he hummed softly, kissing their forehead.

"You miss your dad that much? I never had, like, a real dad that was ever there, but if I did, I would miss them too. Even if my papa is totally amazing and loves me to death like yours does" added with a tiny chuckle. Artemis gurgled, patting his face clumsily. Lucifer kissed their palms too. "I am sorry, buddy. I really wish you haven't been involved in any of this. None of this is your fault. This is all just… adult nonsense. But I am sure that guy loves you, wherever he is. Who couldn't love you with that precious face you have?"

As Artemis calmed down more, Lucifer showed him some nearby flowers, with no real clue of what was their name or if they did anything at all, but liking their colors anyway. Keekee was chasing bugs between his feet. At some point she went closer for pets and Lucifer kneeled, directing the hand of Artemis to also pet her back as she arqued underneath. That seemed to cheer them up again. Lucifer was glad to see their goofy smile back as Keekee turned around and sniffed them, before knocking her head against the palm.

"Papa!"

Lucifer stand up as he saw his three favorites girls running to her. Emily was leading the way, bringing over Charlie by the hand, with a big smile in her face. The face of Charlie, however, didn't gave him more hope that they were going to talk about something light. Vaggie smiled politely when he looked at her, but otherwise didn't leave any hints for him about what was the issue.

"Hey, girls" greeted. "What is up?"

"We actually have a little issue" said Emily, coming up to him and gently guiding him to the table under a big tree. It was supposed to be used for tea time with the residents, but it was hard to coordinate everyone's schedule at once and end up being free for all for whatever someone needed it. Lucifer sat down when Emily moved one of the chair and then she occupies the next one to him. "Okay, so, remember how we were looking into new manufacturers for the pillow sheets because the old ones kept fraying?"

"Uh…" He had no fucking clue what she was talking about. "Sure, honey. I totally remember details like that one. Very important stuff to keep track in order to run a succesful hotel! You don't want fraying at the time of sleep! That would be bad, very bad, for redemption."

"Exactly" Emily perked up. "I knew you would understand, papa. But here is the issue. The new manufacturer that we found is demanding some of the alcohol that we have in store for the pillow sheets in order to get a discount."

"Which we need" added Vaggie quickly. "In order to get more accomodations ready for the hotel. Every penny saved counts, sir."

"Oh, is that all?" asked Lucifer. "Girls, if you need more money, you just have to ask. How much do you need?" said, conjuring his checkbook in the air, ready to sign.

"Papa, no, that is not what we meant" said Charlie, lowering his hand and holding it on his. "We… actually thought maybe we could strike a deal with him so we can renegotiate the conditions. Problem is, I have never done a deal and I am not sure about how to go about it."

"I have never seen one either" intervened Emily. "Is that the kind where you sign papers or the one in which you give each other a hug? Or was it a kiss on the lips? My books are never too clear on that. Also, does it have to be all verbal? Does the phrasing matters really that much?"

Lucifer blinked, looking over at Charlie.

"Sweetie, deals can be… tricky things to navigate. It would be just easier if I give you the money. Or I could send someone to talk with that manufacturer so he gives you the discount already."

"But that is not really handling it on my own, papa" said Charlie with a soft smile, patting his hand. "I can do it, but I would really appreciate having some first hand experience first in how they are done."

Lucifer looked over at Vaggie. If anyone was going to concern themselves with the safety and wellbeing of his daughter, it was going to be her. But instead of trying to change Charlie's mind, she nodded.

"It's just a small demostration, sir" she said to calm him down. "Later we can see the rest."

"I also want to know" added Emily, supporting her chin on her knuckles over the table. "How about you make a small deal with Charlie and then we can be ready to know what to expect from this guy?"

"Honey, I don't know" Lucifer passed a glance over both his daughters with a slight frown. "Demons thrive in deals so they are always looking to make the ones that best work for them."

"That is why we came to you first, papa" said Charlie, smiling again. "Who better teacher about how to make deals responsibly than the devil himself?"

Well, he couldn't argue with that logic. He looked over at the other two and sighed, nodding a long. First, there was a couple of rules to consider when ever looking at deals. The most important was, obviously, that wording was everything. More than person had been tricked into giving out more than they ever hoped for because of the words. Second, you can never force a deal. It has to be a voluntary action that both or more parties freely participate in. You can't hold a gun to someone's head and tell them to agree to the deal or else. Third, the deal is always a two way streets. Everyone involved in it is equally obligated to fulfill the conditions that were already accepted. The only exception is when the other parties agree to call off the deal entirely. That is why the one who had the better wording was considered the winner.

"What kind of conditions?" asked Emily, reclining over to him. "Does it always have to be a life changing thing or it can be small?"

"Well, technically speaking, it could be anything at all if we both agree with it. Honey, could you hold your sibling for a moment?" After Lucifer passed Artemis to Emily, where the baby cooed and played with her fingers, Lucifer turned to Charlie. "Also technically speaking, deals can be sealed with any kind of contact. It could be a kiss, a hug, anything that is mutual and consentual. Handshakes are the most traditional form because they are neutral, safe, while still being able to keep some distance. How do you want to do this, duckling?"

"Well, if it's tradition" said Charlie, offering her hand to him. "Nothing defeats a classic, right?"

"Sure" Lucifer chuckled a little and took it. "Mmmm, how about this? My condition to you is that I want you to keep being the wonderful woman you already are."

"Aww" said Charlie before she straighten up at the energy surging from both of their hands joined. The red and golden magic of Lucifer circuling around his arms while hers, green and red with specs of gold, did the same for her. It tingled on the tip of their fingers. She could feel her own antlers becoming bigger on top of her head. "Oh. My turn?"

"Yes, sweetie" Lucifer nodded, encouraging.

"Well, papa, I… My condition for you is that I want you to… uh…"

"Clean this this leaf off this table" suggested Vaggie, pointing at a single one at the center.

"Oh, good idea! Yes, I want you to take that leaf off the table."

Lucifer smiled as his eyes glowed in intense red, but it was a kinder gesture than many of the people he had been in that same position with before could have witnessed. Both their magics expanded and surrounded both of them, travelling across each other to reach it's destination to make it official. Charlie felt it like a soft pat on top of her chest as the magic of Lucifer came inside.

The whole things must not have lasted more than a few seconds, but it felt like a long time when she looked over to her father. Lucifer let her go first, in order to cover with both hands his mouth. His still red eyes big and incredulous stared at a world far away from anything around him. Tears started to run his cheeks as he pulled himself up, trembling.

"I-I…" Lucifer looked over at the table and patted away the leaf urgently. "I need to find your father!" gasped quickly, dissapearing in a portal.

"No, don't save anything. Just throw it all away" said Vox when one of the cleaners lifted an almost complete body. At his confirmation, the worker dumped all the same on the industrials trash bags that they have brought. "Unless you want it as a snack for later, I guess?" said to Alastor, shrugging. "You already killed them anyway."

"I prefer lively ones for now" said Alastor from the floor, where he haven't moved at all. The most he had done was to hiss any of the workers as they clean up the blood if they came too close to him, but otherwise had just keep drinking from a new bottle. More expensive, more rare, stronger. Still one that his husband could have done better, apparently.

"Suit yourself."

Once all the surfices were cleaned up and all the pieces were gone from his sight, Vox felt a lot better. The moment he let out a small sigh of relief was the one when all the lights went off.

"Another black out, Vox? Really?" said Alastor in the dark and Vox could hear the rolling of eyes in his voice.

"I didn't do anything, you asshole. It must have been Valentino connecting way too much shit to a single outlet at once again. You, keep moving" said to the cleaning crew, that started to take out their own phones to illuminate each other. "The back up regenerators should be up and running in a bit."

The workers left the place, guided by their cellphones. In the complete dark, Vox's face was the only point of illumination.

"Huh, sure it's taking its sweet time" recognized finally.

He was about to make a call to his technicians when suddenly a voice agitated the whole building. It shook it to its very foundation, where they were, just the same as if a pair of giant hands had picked it up and was shaking it to test what it had inside.

"ALASTOR!"

The eartquake was so strong that Vox found himself in the floor. That was the last thing he knew before a pair of tentacles appeared from the dark at his back. One of them picked up his phone from his pockets, crushing it. At the same time, the other crushed his entire screen and threw him by his spine to a corner.

[atxxzist]

broken | c.s (06)

prev // next // series m.list

pairing: choi san x reader

word count: 8.6k

warning: suggestive, idk what else but do lmk if i missed sum!

"so, want to play a few frames?" jongho asks.

though you considered the idea, you still weren't one-hundred percent sure about this 'double date', having told yuna you still needed some time, but she managed to drag you to the local bowling alley, squeezing you into the tightest dress she owns.

it feels like you're being suffocated because not is it only incredibly tight, but also a size too small.

"we could, but, i've never played before."

"oh, thank goodness," he says in relief, "me neither. but you know, protocols and whatnot."

a nervous smile emerges from him and you giggle in response, attention quickly batting to yuna and minhyuk by one of the lanes all flirty smiles and heart eyes, trying to act like they're interested in the game but you know it's the last thing on their mind.

when you first saw minhyuk, his sharp eyes and prominent features were the first thing you noticed.

he's handsome, in an overly intimidating way that probably has fathers pointing fingers and telling their daughters this is the kind of guy they need to stray far from.

which is why you expected his friend to be equally as alarming, only for the softest looking boy you've ever seen to pop out from behind him in parted black hair and puppy-like visual.

he's also an entire grade younger than you.

"you have a boyfriend, or?" his sudden question catching you offguard, unable to help the laughter that slips off.

"i don't," you reply casually. it might be because he's younger that allows for you to relax a little and not feel so tense around someone new and unfamiliar.

"ah, okay. just trying to minimize the risks of possibly getting a black eye, if i, by any chance, happen to hit on you."

another laughter pours at the silly comment.

"if i had a boyfriend, i wouldn't be here."

"oh, true. in that case, i hope you're ready to hear all the bad pick-up lines i've been waiting to use."

you roll your eyes, trying the very best to reframe from breaking out into an amused smile at the boy's attempt. the stark contrast to the one you're used to, because it's so innocent and it doesn't make you feel a little sick afterward.

his silly antics continues to entertain you, a giggle finally leaving along with a big smile plastered on your lips, you wouldn't even think of the possibility of someone watching a little too closely.

but san having arrived long enough to catch the exchange and occupying a booth far in the back, leans into the ear of the girl he came with, spewing a combination of words that brings out a smirk in her before really excusing himself.

"ok, you tell me which one sounds lamer--" jongho is rambling on when a figure comes into his peripheral vision, pausing midway to glare out of curiosity, one eyebrow raising at the person standing before him.

"san? you asshole, is that you?"

your breathing cuts short, head turning around so fast at the name that makes your heartbeat multiply. because it couldn't possibly be your san, right?

but lo and behold, there he is in all flesh and bones--it's those lips you kissed a couple days ago, and he's perfect just as you remember, going on to take a seat beside jongho while nudging him playfully to make space.

"i knew it was this fucker as soon as i stepped foot into the place," san says, a smile too warm on his lips.

jongho snickers and scoots over a little.

"what gave it away? my incredibly handsome look?"

san returns a snicker but with more edge. "the violence i suddenly felt at seeing your annoying face."

"real funny, choi number one. considering you came all the way over here, i'd say you even missed me a little."

"wrong. i came here for y/n."

the way your smile drops from their small banter when san immediately looks your direction is not even funny.

you want to comment on what a small world it is, that your blind date happens to know san, but the only thing that comes out is you in a stuttering mess and muttering out such a rhetorical question.

"y-you guys know each other?" stupid. of course they do.

san looks like he's going to say something but the younger boy beats him to it.

"he attended the same high school."

"right," san adds, "and jongho here, had a thing for playing hero and making my life all more difficult."

jongho chuckles it off and leans back, crossing his arms.

"i was on the school committee. i mean, i still am," he states almost too proudly, "and i was the one who busted this asshole for vaping on school ground."

san quirks his lips to the side with a shrug.

"student life was stressful," is all he says.

"yeah yeah. and somehow i became choi number two just because he's older."

"also because you're a little bitch that got me put on community service my last year of high school. an enemy situation throughout."

jongho stands back up to straighten his posture.

"i object. more like a little enemies turned friends, no? i think we got along fine during the last few weeks of school."

"that's only because i was tolerating your ass and school was ending."

a scoff accompanies jongho as he turns to you.

"somewhere in that cold heart of his, i know he has a soft spot for me." he smiles and you can't help but giggle, missing the way san quickly scans the amount of skin you're showing, along with the kind of dress he thinks you should wear more often.

"so, from what i'm hearing, we're all acquaintances here?" jongho continues.

san has to pry his eyes away while yours shoot to him when he hums out a low note in response.

"well, maybe you and y/n are. but i'm sure i mean more to her than that."

he delivers you a look, something so playful but with a hidden mystery to them that is all more attractive because of a smirk at the corner of his lips.

you don't know what all of it means but he just might be trying to get the upper hand against the younger boy who's even more clueless than you are.

"definitely not her boyfriend, at least. she told me she doesn't have one."

a light pink blush crawls onto your cheeks, growing shy from something that is as a matter of factly, true; having only made it known not even that long ago to said boy.

san chuckles at the sight, the smirk that was there before turning into an amused smile that's just a little addicted to the flush on your face.

"oh, did she now?" he mumbles; an edge to his voice the same time his lips quirk to the side so handsomely.

but jongho doesn't miss a single thing. not the look in san's eyes--a familiar one he's seen far too many times, and definitely not the lovesick symptom on your cheeks.

"you sly mother fucker," he hisses, shaking his head.

"you see, y/n. this is the kind of guy you stay away from."

san laughs, dimissing the boy's remark and playing it off as something lighthearted though it was said with just the smallest kind of cautious undertone like a warning.

"while guys like minhyuk, they might look like they got some shady shit going on, but let me tell you, that guy donates to the animal shelters a few times a year."

you swipe another glance at your roommate and her date from the comment, a smile so wide on minhyuk's face when yuna scores a strike.

"pfft," san blows with a faint eye roll, you turning back to stare at the two in front. "and what kind of guy would you be?" sarcasm in his delivery.

jongho sneers, a confident smile on his expression.

"exactly the kind y/n over here would love to get to know."

san laughs loud and amused, the sound so harmonious to your ear, you wouldn't mind hearing it every single day if given the chance.

your stomach still flutters a little at jongho's words, the silliness that was present before seemingly fading out replaced by a more stern tone that overtakes him.

"i'm sure y/n doesn't date little kids," san snarks, a smirk on him from beating down the younger boy.

"only a couple more months and i'll be of legal age, i'm sure she doesn't mind the wait."

the snicker that escapes you can't be helped, flattered by his attempts but still unable to take him seriously just because he's younger and might just be doing it to piss san off.

"and when is that, if you don't mind me asking," you bring up, genuinely wanting to know and not just because you'll wait for him.

"october the 12th!"

"ah," you softly mumble. "i'll be sure to write it down."

jongho looks to be in awe, haven't really thought that you would take it so literally.

"really?"

you nod, a thin smile drawing on your lips.

"in that case, i should ask for yours, too. when is your birthday, y/n?"

san watches the exchange the entire time with intrigued ears and eyes, at first annoyed by the younger boy who always know how to ruffle a few feathers, but what takes his breath away is how relaxed you are when conversing with jongho.

a side of you he's only seen when you're with your friends; something more lively and carefree, a complete contrast to how tense you always are around him.

but when jongho asks that question, it's the sinking realization that he doesn't know it, too. not just your birthday, but also anything else about you besides your body.

he doesn't remember a single time he's asked you any questions if it wasn't for his own personal benefits.

so why, why the fuck is he suddenly having this crisis and mulling over not knowing enough about you just because you're nosy and want to know more about him. especially when it's something so small and stupid like birthdays.

even when you tell jongho with such a shy smile on your face, uttering the month and day, he knows it will fly over his head later. he's never been good at remembering these kind of things anyways.

"i am going to be sure to remember it!" jongho states with determination, san being unfazed and knowing for sure the boy will because if there's one thing to know about him, it's that he has an annoyingly good memory.

"but say, y/n, you're having a birthday party, would you rather it be at the park or at your grandparents' house?"

"now, why the fuck would you do it at your grandparents' house?" san finally speaks up, his comment earning a low chuckle from you.

jongho groans in agreement. "that's what i told my mom!"

"i guess i'm with the both of you," you say softly, "though i probably don't have the best judgment. i-i don't really celebrate birthdays."

jongho's eyes stills as they keep open, the atmosphere dropping silent until he subtly starts talking again, "oh? how come?"

you never even knew birthdays were deemed such a special occasion; it being celebrated with friends and families all around, happy for that one day that you grow a year older.

the only birthdays you knew of wasn't anything special at all.

it wasn't until mingi invited you to a party of his that freshman year of high school that you learned birthdays aren't supposed to be spent in the small space of your tiny room alone, or trying to guess which parent you'll end up being shipped to next year.

"just something my family never did much, i guess," you simplify, and jongho nods along with an understanding hum.

"they're really not all that," san chips in, both yours and jongho's heads snapping his direction. "waste of money and time."

jongho takes offense, his expression twisting in response.

"okay there, edgelord. someone obviously never got invited to birthday parties as a kid."

"like hell i'd go," san snarks.

jongho rolls his eyes and moves his focus back to you.

"anyways. i will be taking the college entrance exam later this year, and if i don't get into yonsei, you just might see me around after i become of age," he announces somewhat jokingly but with the smallest chance that he means it.

san's husky and unbelievable laughter bursts from beside him, wanting to roll his eyes all the way to the back of his head, knowing the younger boy is playing it up.

"isn't it past your curfew," he remarks, totally out of topic but just eager to take a jab at the innapropriateness of it all considering jongho's age.

jongho furrows his eyebrows and actually checks his phone, an annoyed look on him once he registers the blow.

"you liar. it's only nine."

san scoffs, a little satisfied smirk at the corner of his lips.

"my curfew is at ten, i will tell you!"

the boys continues to make small, harmless insults to one up one another while you watch on the side, officially becoming a third wheel but the sight is too endearing for a subtle smile to not crack.

eventually, you have to use the restroom; sparing one last glance at yuna before excusing yourself to ask one of the workers.

this one is a little bigger; a few stalls at least and has two sinks. but while washing your hands, all you're able to think about is san back there and how it was the most you've gotten to know about him without having to ask.

maybe it's the magic of jongho and his more childish, laidback persona that allowed for not just you, but san as well, to show a more playful side of him. nothing like the man you've become accustomed to who's a little more calculating in his nature.

having watched as he fooled with the younger boy, wrestling and tickling him with a certain competitiveness that brings out a cute giggle that makes him look so approachable, exactly the kind of guy you think your aunt and uncle would approve of.

from a mere glance, no one would be able to tell this is the guy currently breaking your heart; the one having planted so many doubts in your head, he doesn't even bother to call or text anymore after having made clear what this is between you and him.

because unless you seek him out first, you won't hear from him. and it's been three days since the last time you were at his place, breathing underneath him and feeling so much pleasure, only to regret it later, swearing on your life this is the worst feeling ever and you're not sure if you can do it again.

you just didn't think, especially during a time where you're supposed to be forgetting about him--your face full of makeup products you usually wouldn't wear and a dress too tight hugging your body, that he'd show up so handsome and charming; all kinds of reminder why you returned the two times before and why it won't be the last.

about ready to go back, you're only a few inches out the door when a pair of hand latches onto your shoulders, pushing you back in against the counter, your eyes looking up into the one person capable of cornering you like this.

"hey," san utters, a coy smile on his lips as his hands releases from your shoulders and settles on the counter, trapping you inbetween.

you tense up a little, shifting in your spot and managing to reply through your trembling voice.

"h-hey."

he quirks an eyebrow before a smaller laughter bubbles out, one hand going to move the strands covering your eyes the way he always does.

"what's the matter? i haven't seen you in three days." his chest relaxes a little and his shoulders drop, inching even closer to you.

it's like once he really got that out of the way, everything starts leaking to the surface as well. everything about who this man really is and how he's nothing alike to the sweet, considerate boy you bumped into back at the party who helped you.

it's an awful discovery.

but what's worse is whenever you look at him, beyond his exterior and closed-off nature, you think there's a person underneath that you would love to know.

someone who has a story of his own; a story you would love to listen to if given the chance.

but that's always been your downfall. because when you love, you love hard. and maybe you didn't completely love junseo, but when someone is yours and you're theirs, you give them your entire heart.

and someone like san, someone so unattainable with his coy eyes and dimply smiles that always turn you a few shade redder, you think it would be nice if he was yours and you were his... because you would undoubtly love him wholeheartedly.

"i was busy," you tell him, swallowing down the pit that is both nervous but excited at whatever's about to come.

"that's fine," he dismisses it along with a low buzz under his breath, eyes quick to drool over the amount of exposed skin he's been dying to touch all night.

he's never seen you in this kind of outfit before. you were usually covered in three layers of clothing that was always annoying to take off.

"how did you know it was me?" you ask, playing dumb to the sight of his bottom lip in between his teeth.

he has to rip his attention away to meet your stoic eyes at the question, murmuring, "huh?"

"you told jongho you came over because of me, or was that--" a lie, too?

"--no, no, beautiful." he shakes his head, both hands caressing over your cheeks. "of course i was telling the truth. i knew from the hair and from the mole on your right shoulder."

san might not know a lot of things about you. not even the basics of your favorite movie or your dream, and he's not even sure if he remembers your birthday although you just told them not even that long ago, but he knows your body and all the ins and outs of it.

how your lips taste like, how pretty your boobs are, and how exactly to get you to cum. he knows all the faces you make during sex, and what to say and how to say it just so he can see that color on your cheeks that he likes a little too much.

and he definitely could spot that soft, silky texture of hair that had a big likelihood of it being yours.

he was only maybe seventy-percent confident at first, but the closer he got to the table, catching that mole on your shoulder he's gotten used to seeing, he knew it was you for sure.

"oh..." you say defeatedly, unable to wrap your head around the fact that san can actually recall something about you.

"what's wrong? you're not actually thinking about waiting for jongho and disappointed that i showed?"

your lips forms a pout, shaking your head.

"no. it's not that."

he chuckles, always having enjoyed backing you into a corner as if that's ever been hard to do.

"good. because he already left. his mommy called."

"oh..."

"yeah," he repeats, a tone so satisfied about the fact he's the only person for you at the moment. no chances of anyone else stealing your attention away; not even a pestering high schooler who lives to annoy him but also has the possibility of developing the smallest crush on you.

one of his hands suddenly snakes to your hip, settling on it with a light squeeze that makes you jolt up; the closer he leans in, the more your back presses against the edge of the counter.

"you look so fucking hot like this," he hisses, eyes once again unashamedly checking you out.

"it's yuna's dress."

"well, you should wear yuna's dresses more often."

his hand at your hip fumbles with the material, bottom lip caught in between his teeth again when it comes over just how perfect it fits over your figure.

silence eats up the air until he looks up and catches your gaze in his, staring at him like you're just waiting to be wrecked the same way he's always done it. a smirk crawls onto him and with one lift of your chin, you're both kissing and making out like it'll be the last time.

your arms are thrown around his neck immediately, and he's come to love the fact that you're starting to strip away that shy, hesitated act the more these sessions happen.

his hands that were on your hips are now all over your body as he nearly backs your head into the mirror, barely able to plant a kiss on your jawline when the sound of distant footsteps outside pries him away, staring into your horrified eyes at the thought of being caught in this position.

he shushes you, index finger to his lips and drags you away to the nearest stall, his back against the door and you breathing hard on his chest.

a pair of female voices echoes through the room, a conversation you don't really catch because your waist is wrapped around by one of san's arms while his other one travels down the bare of your skin, landing on your ass and squeezing it with a sadistic smirk on his lips.

you would've yelped if not for the current situation, in turn settling for a soft push to his chest that brings out that smile you so much despise because you hate how adorable it is and how dangerous it is on a man like san.

all you hear is the sink running and a few pops like something opening, maybe to reapply their makeups but is it drowned out by san's lips on yours and you at first unsure about making out in a restroom stall, but soon enough, you're gripping at his shirt and forgetting about all consequences.

you don't even realize the two are gone until san pulls away and the quietness of it all confirms it's only you and him again.

"let's take it back to the dorm?"

and you would've impulsively said yes, if not for your conscious serving as a reminder of the existence of your roommate who you came with.

"i want to, but, i came with yuna..."

"i'm sure she'll understand."

you used jongho as an excuse; your partner having gone home and all leaving there nothing to do. yuna didn't seem to mind, head occupied and infatuated with her date.

as soon as you're both off the elevator, his lips is on yours and your hands are running through his black hair, grateful for the late hours that has less students running around the building.

because it would truly be shameful if someone is to catch you two in this state, so high drunk off of lust, the key in your hold struggling to fit from your shaken hand.

but once you get it to open, you're both in immediately and the door behind is slammed shut, your back already touching the sheet of your bed and he's hovering on top once again diving down to kiss you.

his hand is fast to make an appearance under the skirt of your dress, kneading the soft skin of your thighs and traveling to the top of your underwear. you made sure to wear one alike to safety shorts.

while he works your undergarment, you pull at his shirt that rides up his toned abs, but you only make it about halfway before a sound in the pocket of his pants go off.

he ignores it the first time, but then comes the second.

a groan loosely escapes the tip of his tongue, having to break the kiss to stand on his knees, one hand rummaging his pockets.

you sit up with elbows planting the mattress and watch as his once annoyed expression dissipates at whatever is on the screen, his eyes even swelling a bit.

clearing his throat and shoving it back where he got it from, you can sense the change of demeanor, his body language giving away that he now wants to be out of here.

climbing off your bed as you stare with a disappointed sadness in your eyes, he finally speaks the dreaded words.

"hey, beautiful, i uhm... i gotta go." he awkwardly fidgets in his spot when telling you that, looking so out of place.

"oh..." you voice lowly, sitting up and scooting until your legs are hanging off the side of the bed, not bothering to hide the disappointment.

he attempts to put on a smile; try to make all of this hurt a little less, walking forward and placing a kiss on your forehead.

"i'll call you."

and when he leaves, you don't feel any better or any worse. the feeling is always the same; a deep hollow pain in your chest that makes you feel like an empty shell of a person.

why do you keep subjecting yourself to this kind of treatment? a part of you aware to the great possibility that the only reason he asked to come to your place was for this exact reason.

saying he has to go or that something came up is easier to lie about than straight kicking you out. and someone like san always know how to play his cards so he can lessen the blow.

so perhaps it's his adorable smile; the way your heart always flutter at the sight of him, and whenever he talks, you want to listen to him forever.

that stupid ounce of hope you so foolishly hang onto, wishing one day he'll come around because you're even more stupid to have faith in him.

facts about choi san.

1. birthday: july 10th 2. favorite color: purple 3. major cat lover 4. deathly afraid of bugs 5. was on community service senior year of high school

when san called earlier, asking if you can come to his place some time in the late morning, you know it's a bad idea.

you have already set a time and place to meet with yeosang at noon because the second exam is approaching fast, and shortly after, you have to leave for work, your schedule having been moved up the one weekday you don't have any class because your supervisor wants you to experience an actual classroom setting instead of the after school kids you've been watching.

the job proved to be a lot more than just being a teacher's aide, granted you told them you couldn't really work mornings because of being a college student and all.

but you haven't seen him since that night, and his promise of calling having came true filling you with that temporary feeling of joy and excitement, convincing yourself it doesn't hurt to see him for a bit as you rush over to his place.

but when you arrive at the scene, the new sight of his door left slightly opened along with what sounds like feet shuffling around tells you you're not going to get to see san today.

"no, because you're literally always fucking like this!"

you flinch at the sudden high volume of a voice you recognize as it fills san's apartment.

"you bring your shit into my house and i'm always the one who has to clean it up."

and though you've only met him a few times, you know it belongs to wooyoung.

"well, how was i supposed to know that she's friends with yunho and mingi and that you would end up liking them so much?"

the sink in your chest is heavy and the beating of your heart is loud; it's an awful revelation that the topic of conversation is... you.

"you don't. no matter who she's friends with or related to, you don't look at someone and think they're the next pretty little thing you're going to ruin."

you listen in closely, a silence that gauges the air making your breath catch inside your throat at the suspense.

you know it's wrong, but turning back doesn't seem to be much of an option especially when it's about you. it's only a given you'd be nosy.

following the silence is a heaved sigh before there's another round of feet walking in place.

"i don't know what you want me to do? if she didn't want it as well, i wouldn't be doing it."

it's san's voice, shortly followed by a sarcastic, dry laughter from wooyoung.

"that's what you always say, choi. that it's their fault; they knew what they were getting into, when you know damn well what you're fucking doing."

he pauses to catch his breath, not done just yet.

"so either get your shit sorted or stop messing with the girl because the last thing i want is a room full of death stares and resentment because my friend is a grade a asshole. i did this shit for you in high school but i'm starting to get real tired of it."

you don't get the chance to process the whirls of emotion attacking all at once, the direction of the footsteps sounding like they're headed for the door and you just assume the worst--that it's wooyoung leaving, scuttling away before you can be seen.

~

when you return to the dorm, the first thing you do is text san with an excuse that something came up. you wouldn't tell him you overheard a conversation that makes you sick to the stomach, so many conflicted thoughts running loose.

surely wooyoung would have suspected something (it's not like you guys were that good at hiding it), but you're also not close to him like that, which leads you to believe the outburst had more to do with yunho and mingi than you.

"well, how was i supposed to know that she's friends with yunho and mingi and that you would end up liking them so much?"

and you're not sure what's worse; having one of your friends tattletale to wooyoung to get san off your back, or that one (if not both) of them knew this whole time.

all those excuses and attempts at being discreet probably looked pathetic to whoever knew it was just so you can fall into the arms of a boy who doesn't care for you in the slightest; who lies to your face and messes with your head.

"i don't know what you want me to do? if she didn't want it as well, i wouldn't be doing it."

~

you're still not in a good headspace by the time you have to meet yeosang, which is literally just an hour after you were supposed to be seeing san.

he's in the far back of the cafe, eyes and nose stuck to a textbook and looking like he's absolutely going to ace this upcoming test.

you on the other hand, is absolutely pissed off your mind the more you keep lingering on it, coupled with the fact that there wasn't even enough time to actually get over it beforehand.

but why couldn't they just talk it out with you first? why did it have to jump straight into telling wooyoung about your business?

and also why the fuck are you not more upset at san? you should be. you need to be. it's evident he planned it all from the start and never really had any good intentions with you.

it's funny how you found all of this out while at his doorstep; maybe the only good thing to have came from it is you didn't end up in his bed (today at least).

but you suppose san being a walking red flag you should stay away from is the equivalent of beating a dead horse at this rate.

the tension is written all over your face when you take a seat across from yeosang, him looking up to quirk an eyebrow.

"hey?"

"hey."

"you sure you don't want to come over here?"

you briefly recall how anal he was about it last time when you sat across, so without further protests, you stand up to go plop down next to him, an irritated sigh departing without much thoughts but it doesn't go unnoticed by him.

"well... okay," he mutters under his breath, wondering who or what managed to tick you off knowing it's not him this time. he's only said a few words so far.

quick to dismiss it because of the limited time, he pulls the neglected laptop into his view, navigating to the school site.

"he made a study guide, we can go over that."

and he really is trying; this being the second time, even gave you somewhat of a proper greeting without any snarks or additional comments, but what bothers him more than your already less than stellar arrival, is your lack of participation.

eyes and ears not even following along and head entirely elsewhere.

mind you, he had to push his schedule back just to come here.

"something wrong? if there's anything bothering you or you have somewhere to be, you can tell me."

"it's nothing."

"sure looks like something because i doubt you heard a single thing."

you knit your brows together, arms crossing over one another as you glare at him.

"blade server: type of server that exists in the form of a single circuit board," you repeat the last term he was going over, even slightly imitating the way he said it.

he chuckles wryly.

"well, you heard one of them at least," he says; some kind of satisfaction that graces the corner of his lips with a faint smirk.

you roll your eyes, moving your attention to one of the paintings hanging on the wall, trying to reframe from bursting because you're still not over what you just heard not even that long ago.

"isn't it tiring?"

your head snaps back to him, confusion overtaking your expression.

"what is?"

"this shy, reserved act of yours whenever you're with others. with your friends, with that guy, san. do they know you're this overbearing in actuality?"

"excuse me?" your voice high in disbelief.

he cocks his head a little.

"or perhaps, that's what it is. you only act like that around guys like san, but someone like me, you're not trying to impress so you don't give jackshit about how you come off."

red on your face, red in your veins, and red under your breath.

"and you don't have an act of your own?" you fire back, somehow managing to find the girl in you who has a voice and definitely some guts, but she who goes missing when it comes to telling san to fuck off.

"pretending to be this nice guy around yunho and mingi, like you're doing a favor by helping their friend when all you do is insult me behind their back."

you stand up furiously, grabbing at your things and sparing him one last glance (that you hope will intimidate him).

"you won't ever have to worry about wasting your time on someone like me ever again."

you don't need mingi or yunho (or both) shielding you like you're an infant still in a cradle, and you definitely do not need kang yeosang blowing up on you when you're just starting to realize how much you hate this fucking computer class and all this technical junk; when everything's already going to shit.

but your whole life has been a load of shit one after another so you suppose it's not entirely out of place.

which is why you ultimately decided that if it's going to turn to shit, it should all just be on the table at this point.

when you show at mingi's door just a few minutes right after you get off work, you know wooyoung is not there. he usually never is. he's always either at his own parties or at one of the five other properties under his parents name.

between the two options, you're more willing to bet it's the one person who actually shares a living space with wooyoung, squeezing yourself in and slamming the door behind before mingi could even get out a simple 'hey'.

he's stunned by the sudden cornering, as expected.

"woah there, missy," mingi coos, that lighthearted tone in his voice you recognize whenever he jokes around--completely disregarding the more serious look on your face.

"did you... by any chance, said something to wooyoung?"

you try to keep vague, for all you know, you just might be overstepping the boundaries and giving your friends too little credits.

wooyoung could've done it even without the push from one of them, but it's best to confirm before digging your own grave.

mingi pulls his brows into confusion.

"like?"

you clear your throat, swallowing down a knot, loathing how much harder he's making this, or if he's just really good at burying his own dirts. it's not exactly out of character for him.

"like--"

the abrupt knock at the door from behind cuts you short, your breath fuming before turning around to open it; the thinning patience not allowing you to consider even for a second who it might be, a small jump in your body when you see it's the other suspect. how convenient.

yunho doesn't say anything and neither does you or mingi. he awkwardly clears the block in his throat and walks himself in through the small space until he's standing tall in front of you.

after you close the door, it's the longest silence you've ever endured in the presence of the two, all your eyes bouncing from one to another before yunho finally speaks.

"did i miss an invitation?"

mingi chuckles, seemingly already relaxed.

"you're not the only one. miss y/n just busted into my room to interrogate me."

you shoot lasers at him and mutters something inaudible under your breath. it could be yunho, but he's usually the wiser of the two and mingi hasn't exactly done anything that makes him less likely--

"it was me," yunho deadpan, both you and mingi shooting his direction so fast.

mingi having no idea what's going on, switches his gaze between the expressionless boy next to him and the enraged look on you.

"why?" you say, so short and simple but the tone is everything but that.

"because i can't bear to watch you keep doing this to yourself. my intuition was right, and--"

"and you couldn't just talk to me?"

"wait, is this about san?" mingi ask, his voice such a contrast to the bubbling tension.

"and if i talked to you, would you have even listened?"

"well, i wouldn't know because you didn't even talk to me. you just went straight into airing my business to his friend."

"it's definitely about san," mingi mutters to himself, his presence completely ignored.

"i just thought that maybe san might listen to wooyoung since they're friends. and that if he stays away, you'll reframe from seeking him out."

it's quiet after that but the air is thick as you two stare into each other with something unpleasant brewing in your chest.

"h-how did you know?"

a low exhale departs yunho before he answers, "it was only a suspicion at first, but then i saw san walking back with you to the dorm that night. and well... you're kind of awful at being discreet."

an eyebrow raise at the confession, your face eventually twisting into distaste.

"you were spying on me?!"

"i wasn't spying on you. it was a coincidence, ask mingi. me and him were coming back from the library because of the campus job i was telling you about."

so... mingi saw it, too.

"yunho... i appreciate your concerns, but, i can make my own choices."

a dry, almost mocking laughter leaves him as he takes a seat at the edge of mingi's bed and stares you down.

yunho isn't an intimidating person; the boy always so nice and easy to talk to, any fights or arguments you guys ever had up till this point has never been this bad. but his gaze right now does make you feel a little small.

"and what is that going to be?" he throws his hands up. "returning to the same person who you know is emotionally unavailable? who won't ever love you the way you really want him to?"

"you talk as if you know him personally..."

you know you shouldn't have said it; defending someone who doesn't deserve it, and well aware there's not a single bone in yunho's body that is capable of harms, but you're so tired of the coddling.

so tired of being looked at as someone breakable.

"no. but i know people like him; guys like him. i know that they will never just magically come around, and most of all, i know that this isn't what you want. you're sticking to him in hope that he'll change his mind, no matter how much you want to deny it."

you've always hated how observant he is...

"then... why do you guys hang with wooyoung, and why is he friends with san? wooyoung is a good person, right? so shouldn't san be, too?"

you're deflecting; it's awful, but it does catches yunho offguard, and even mingi. yunho who was so sure before now mouth clasped tight, because yunho's an honest man, and as an honest man, he doesn't know either.

the couple of times he's met wooyoung, he's aways been pleasant to be around; welcoming of his presence with opened arms and always with a smile on his face to make sure yunho was never left out.

the question asked--more for wooyoung himself than yunho.

"i'm not sure if i can answer that, but, can you promise me at least? that you'll stay away? if not for me, do it for yourself."

you're quiet, shifting to look down at the floor and tracing the pattern when a groan falls from yunho.

"fine." he stands up, his towering height and cold eyes making you feel all sorts.

"call me whenever you actually consider our friendship these last four years instead of whatever you're having with a guy that you just met this semester."

"yunho..." mingi mumbles, disapproval in his tone.

yunho doesn't say anything else, only rushing for the door as he brushes past you before it is slammed shut.

"he didn't mean it." mingi glares at you.

"i know he didn't."

you limp to his bed, taking the seat where yunho was sitting before, still able to feel the warmth he had left behind.

mingi sighs, shaking his head and eventually sitting down with you.

"and i know you don't want to hear this again, but he's right."

as a friend, mingi cares for you. of course he does. but as the boy who found you under that oak tree when you were fourteen years old; as someone who knew you before yunho, before anyone else, he also understands the curiosity you hold for the world; for what else is out there.

you have been deprived of these things almost your entire life, he thinks it's ony natural. so he never tries to be too hard on you when he sees your eyes wander and your nose perked.

he's just always sitting back and watching; observing. yunho and him the perfect contrast to one another because though he may be loud and obnoxious, he tries to stir away from possibly upsetting you. whereas yunho can be a bit overprotective despite his quietness on a surface level.

"i know..." you say, "i just... wish he'd have a little bit more faith in me. i-i can handle it." even you're failing to convince yourself.

mingi breathes out a pitiful look in his eyes, taking your hands into his and locks gaze with you. he's about to get sentimental and you know it. his silly and laidback personality a perfect combination to his more vulnerable side he lets loose once in a while.

"remember the last time you fought with yunho?"

you wouldn't really call it a fight, it was barely an argument, maybe more of a disagreement but aside from this one, that was definitely the most heated you two ever got.

you nod, mumbling in a low volume, "yeah."

"and how angry you were at him?"

"yeah, because he was acting without thinking and i was worried about him."

it was a fight between yunho and minji, at first over something so small but eventually escalating into something bigger.

"i was afraid he was gonna do something he'd regret later."

yunho had spent most of his high school years crushing on minji, always so shy and unconfident, until he finally mustered up the courage to ask the girl out to which she said yes (obviously). and he was gonna throw it all away for something that he probably wouldn't even think about a week from then.

"exactly. because you were looking out for him, and he's just looking out for you, too."

your hands stiffen in mingi's grasp, a sullen look on your face. you also know that.

"look," he says, scooting closer. "i poke my nose in everything, and it's only because i live to annoy you, but in all honestly, i wouldn't ever intrude on your personal affairs. but some days, i still think about how he treated you back at the party."

he goes on, "i was happy at first, him being wooyoung's friend and all. he was also okay when we went out to dinner, but someone who genuinely likes you would not sideline you the way he did."

your mind briefly flashes back to the party, thinking about how hopeful and stupid you looked with that jacket on like a little lost puppy.

thinking about the smirk so fittingly as it rested on his lips when he flirted with your unknowing roommate, using her as leverage to achieve whatever end result he was getting at.

thinking about how you foolishly believed his lie at the time, but overtime seeing for yourself nothing is accidental or coincidental especially in the face of a man like san.

everything is done intentionally and with the purpose to gain; getting you a job and definitely messing with you at the party. he might've even lied on that date with jongho, too.

"and i never asked for anything from you before, but i'm just asking this one time, if you can... please listen to yunho and keep a distance from san."

mingi squeezes your hand, his stance desperate as he awaits your answer.

it takes longer this time around for you to say something, but when you finally do, mingi could've swear he heard it wrong when a quiet "fine" falls from your lips.

"r-really?" his eyes grow in incredulity.

you nod. "if you and yunho are this worried, then i'll stop seeing him."

his chest exhales in relief, the once uneasy expression on him dropping, wondering what prompted the sudden change of mind or if he's really just that good at giving overall sappy speeches.

"oh dear, you got me so scared."

you giggle at his comment, the first time today you're allowed to smile.

he releases the hold on you, backing up a little but gaze having never left, a slight tense in his body language that you know he's going to act on.

"okay, but, can i ask something? and bitch you better not lie to me. we tell each other everything, remember?"

you swallow the knot in your throat, afraid of what he's going to ask and with a feeling it's going to knock your breath away.

"right," you hesitantly answer.

and well... you hate to be correct.

"have you slept with him?"

you almost choked on your own saliva.

"mingi..." you hiss.

"you heard me, bitch. did you guys do the devil's tango?"

you roll your eyes, kicking at his leg lightly and exasperating out loud.

"oh my god, why the hell are you calling it that?"

"oh, whatever. you know what i mean. did. you. guys. fucked?" he crosses his arms.

he can be so sweet and understanding, and then at the same time, go and ask questions like this.

he squints his eyes.

"you know, silence is incriminating. hesitation is damaging, and something tells me you slept with him. not once. not twice."

a small surge of panic rushes in, grabbing at the pillow nearby and smacking him in the face with it.

he winces in exaggerated pain and you toss the pillow back, shooting daggers at him.

"i swear, if you rip that, you're paying for a new one."

"worth it to shut that big ass mouth of yours."

it's a couple seconds before he breaks out into laughter and you follow along with a simple giggle.

"okay but please... can you promise me you won't tell yunho?"

he shrugs, lips quirked to the side.

"what makes you think he doesn't suspect it as well? but sure, i guess. you should really talk to him, though. after this."

mingi plays it cool, a smile on his face and burying that feeling aside that he's just the littlest bit of sad your first time went to someone who doesn't love you.

granted, he's never really cared too much for such thing, always having joked around his parents will end up with no grandkids because he doesn't plan on adopting, either.

but he's always thought that if you were to have it, he'd want your first time to be special. with someone you love, and who loves you the same; your heart always so big and with so much to give.

not someone like san who lures you in with his handsome look and butterflies-alarming words, knowing he never planned to give anything in return except to add to the list of your miseries.

he can't help but feel it is his fault--for leaving you at the party and for ever introducing wooyoung.

but at least now, you will stay away and spare yourself an inevitable heartbreak... he hopes.

~

you approach the door of yunho's room with cautious steps, hesitation in your appearance because of the one person he shares the space with.

you knock lightly, proceeding to wait and it doesn't take long before it creaks open and yunho is standing before you.

he doesn't look surprised by it, if anything, he looks like he was expecting you to show up at one point. it's just so in character.

you take this chance to sneak a glance past his shoulders, seeing it's in the clear.

"may i come in?" you ask sweetly.

he nods, a hum under his breath and steps aside to let you in.

"i'm sorry," you say, turning to him as his back is to the door. "sorry for acting like a bitch earlier, i know you were just looking out for me. and... i talked to mingi, and i already promised him i-i'll stay away from san."

rather than a sudden change of mind, it was more the realization that you don't need whispered sweet lies or kisses from a boy who doesn't even like you; who always have made you feel so shitty about yourself.

your friends matter, and you're going to listen to them.

that the next time choi san calls or texts, no matter what emojis he uses or what words he will say to get you to come to his place, you're going to ignore him.

next // series m.list

taglist: @sorryimananti-romantic @revehosh @cookiechristie @avantalem @atiny68 @belletiny @shibera @mochibabycakes @justineasian @eastleighsblog @baguette-atiny @crimson-mia @yeosxxx @m4rsluv @sleepychimm @atz-diary @diorwoo @naiify @becauseiloveyunho @damagelove @softie00 @s-nsanshine @atinytinaa @moonseonghwa @lemontreefantasy @wooyoung4eva @yeosangsbiceps @likexaxdaydream @knucklesdeepmingi @barbielibra @tmtxtf @brown88 @harusoraa

[ottpopfic]

Leo didn’t expect things to be any different when and if they got together. He expected Jason im-gonna-put-it in-my-mouth touch-starved-but-touch-love-language Grace to be a clingy mother fucker. He had expected a few hickies and more than a normal amount of PDA. But his man has been going at it like he is trying to break a record, or break Leo’s brain, whichever came first

---

sequel to Asteroids

Leo didn’t expect things to be any different when and if they got together. He expected Jason im-gonna-put-it in-my-mouth touch-starved-but-touch-love-language Grace to be a clingy mother fucker. He had expected a few hickies and more than a normal amount of PDA. But his man has been going at it like he is trying to break a record, or break Leo’s brain, whichever came first

“You got another one” Georgie points out with her cereal spoon “Or are your hickies growing? I'm pretty sure there supposed to fade not get bigger”

“Georgina I'm gonna freeze all of your underwear before you go back to school don't test me” Leo threatens his little sister, because as much as he loves to see her but she is still his little sister which means she must be a little shit

“I'm just saying” she pressed on unphased “You need to get Jason one of those autism chew necklaces before he takes a chunk out of you” 

Leo has a retort on the tip of his tongue, but it's actually a good idea. It would keep Jason from stealing the drywall anchors to nash into bits. Leo bets he could find him a cute little wolf one, or make one they have food-grade silicon somewhere. He would need to make a mold first though, meaning if he wanted to surprise him he would have to sculpt the proof in secret 

“Oh my gods you are thinking about it” Georgie gapes “You are thinking about getting him a little chew necklace, you are so gross”

“I will end you Georgie” he threatens, pulling his hands out of the soapy dish water and rounding on her with his wet fingers “You are dead”

His sister just shrieks and flees, abandoning her dirty cereal bowl and screaming about how gross he is as she books it out of the main room. Leo lets her go, grabbing her bowl to add to the dirty dish pile. 

He gets lost in thought with the repetitive task. It's been a few months since he and Jason mashed faces and got together, and it's been better than he ever let himself dream.

For so long Leo had tried to put his feelings for Jason in a little box and keep them there. He had loved him back to life, but that didn't mean Jason had to love him in return. Jason had had enough of people playing with his emotions, and Leo didn't want to tempt the fates into starting the cycle again.

But things had changed, the bubble between them had popped, and now every day was just Jason . And nothing bad had happened, now Leo got to wake up surrounded by a clingy blond and things were allowed to be good. They were pretty fucked up still, but at least they were fucking while being fucked up now

Leo pauses his contemplating as he's brought into an embrace from behind, he doesn’t need to look to know it's Jason. The strong arms would give it away on his own, but the way he sticks his nose in Leo’s hair and sniffs all around really gives him up. Leo gets that the smelling thing is left over from being raised by wolves, and it became more pronounced after they both died a bunch of times and Jason got all his memory back. They had talked about it at length when they started sharing a room, too freaked out by even having a door between each other at any given time. If Jason is comfortable enough with you to lower his neurotypical/roman mask you will be smelled, sometimes even head-butted. Leo thinks it's cute, but since they got together Jason has let even more of his feral side show, so now his life includes about three times more being smelled than it did before.

It's kinda nice though, in a cozy protective slightly jealous sort of way. Jason doesn’t get this intense with anyone else, it makes Leo feel solid . He drys off his hands so he can run his fingers through Jason's hair, getting a happy hum in return and the bridge of his man’s nose being shoved hard into his shoulder. Jason pulls him closer, almost dragging Leo across the floor with their size difference, and isn’t that hot. Leo never thought being manhandled would be a turn-on, self-conscious about never getting over 5’5”, but here they are

“‘Morning” Leo greets, he knows Jason had a late night with time zones calling New Rome for some emergency pope thing. Everyone in the Way Station was kind to let him sleep

Jason hums content and nuzzles deeper into Leo's shoulder and back. 

Leo scratches his man's hair for another moment before going back to the dishes, he's almost done. Jason stays a stick-tight the whole time, something that's becoming the norm fast. Leo doesn’t mind, it’s nice to feel this wanted. It’s when all of the dishes are stacked on the drying rack and he would like to move out of the kitchen where they meet an impasse 

“Jase” Leo starts

“Hmm?”

“I finished the dishes babe”

“Mm,”

“You need to let go so I can move”

“Mm-Mmm” he gets in a sleepy negative, paired with Jason shaking his head no into his shoulder 

“Jase,” Leo sighs at his dramatics, he's been hanging out with Will too much. It's nice to have their friends, but whining as a concept has increased tenfold since they got closer “Jason baby you gotta let go”

That gets him a little groaning grumble and pulled in tighter, his feet do slide a tad across the floor this time.

“Jason” Leo starts to laugh “You're being a baby, common”

That just gets him bit, teeth clamping into his shoulder where Jason’s nose was before. Leo yelps and starts to struggle, trying to contain his laughter less he encourages his man, but it's futile. He gets a few smaller nips on his neck in retaliation for his struggling, and then Jason is back to smashing his face into his shoulder. Leo goes dead weight in his arms, it doesn’t change a thing about his predicament 

Leo ragdolls for a moment, trying to figure out how to get out of his man’s hold when he's twice as big and three times as strong. Jason isn’t even deterred, completely content to sleepily hold Leo like they're not burning daylight in the most public space in the whole Way Station. Leo heaves a sigh and goes back to scratching through Jason’s hair, it's nice grown out from the military cut from their teenhood. It's not long persey, but the fluff of it is soft and cute.

“How ‘bout this,” Leo finally bargains “I'll stay with you for breakfast and chores if you let me go”

He gets a snort in reply, and then a groan, but Jason does let him go. It allows Leo to twist around and face the blond, holding him gently with both hands on his jaw to give him a good morning kiss before going to reheat the breakfast he saved him in the microwave. Once seated Jason follows his movements with hawk eyes as he putters around, sliding first the breakfast sandwich and then coffee in front of his man at the counter island. 

Leo sits next to him as Jason eats. It's quiet right now, most everyone is off on chores or out for the day, leaving them alone in the expanse of the main room. Leo sits next to him on the stools of the counter island, back against the laminate and resting his head on Jason's shoulder. He doesn’t feel the need to fill the silence, not anymore when it's just the two of them, he can just bask in the presence of his man and fidget with his current pocket project and be absolutely content 

They spend the day together, which isn't unusual. They might have been codependent on a good day before they were official, but no one they know is in a truly sane relationship. With everything they all went through in their teens, Leo thinks they are allowed to be a bit unhinged. So what if they are attached at the hip when there together, it's not hurting anyone 

Jason is extra quiet today though, and extra in his own head. It worries Leo a bit, but it could equally be fatigue from his late night or stress from his work. Jason still gets dreams from gods about what they want from them with temples and offerings and how it all needs to be just so, the process sounds exhausting 

He figures it out after dinner. They're getting ready for bed, Leo is already in soft sleep pants and changing his shirt when he feels Jason’s eyes on him. He pauses digging in his dresser to peek over, Jason's lightning focus trained on him

“You good?” he checks. Jason hums and meets Leo in the middle, pressing a kiss to the entry point of his lightning scar

Leo is pretty sure the lightning strike scar is the one that bothers Jason the most. He's not sure if it’s because of the lightning, or that Zeus himself struck him down for cussing him out to his face, but Jason has to plant at least one kiss on it almost every time he sees it. He used to have such a pained face when Leo took off his shirt, but having permission to touch now seems to soothe him. 

It's Leo's biggest scar, starting with an entry wound on his left shoulder and then spider-webbing Lichtenberg Figures down Leo's back, chest, and left arm. He's woken up many times to Jason's gentle fingers tracing the pattern. It wasn’t even his most painful death, he was just yelling at the King of the Gods about how he's an awful dad, and then poof he's in the underworld again. Drowning had been way worse

And holding Jason as he bled out when he took that blow for him the very last time had been worse than them all put together, but that's neither here nor there. Because right now Jason is very much alive and using his mouth to trace the lines of the electricity until he's kneeling on the floor, and Leo moans when he bites down on the exit point on his hip bone

Leo runs his hand over Jason’s largest scar in return. It starts in the same place Leos does on the opposite side, midway through the right shoulder, but Jason’s is a slicing scar through both sides of his body from when he was bisected. The path of it travels from his shoulder to his ribs below the left pectoral, a clean line through the heart. Leo runs his fingers over the texture of it on Jason’s back, tracing the raised bump of the scar tissue. His man sighs against where his skin and pant line meet, hands snaking up again against Leo’s lower back

“You okay” Leo checks in, his voice soft “You've been all quiet and extra clingy today”

Jason startles and tries to pull away “Sorry, I can-“

“I didn’t say stop” Leo interrupts, using his hand placement on his back to keep Jason where he is on his knees “I'm just checking in with you”

Jason looks him in the eyes like he's trying to find some dishonesty there, but whatever he finds in Leo's gaze makes him relax back into him. Jason presses his cheek back into when his hip meets his leg and sighs, Leo runs his hand through the blond’s hair. He wants to let his man take his time with it, but they're also standing in the middle of the room like a pair of morans

“Common” Leo prompts, and moves away the two feet to the bed and sits down on the edge. Jason looks lost kneeling on the floor where he left him, and doesn’t move until Leo reaches towards him again. Then Leo has a lap full of man, pressing his face back into his neck. The suddenness of it has Leo pitching over backward, and Jason goes with him.

This is good though, for someone who got crushed to death in a collapsing tunnel Leo loves the deep pressure of Jason on top of him. It makes his brain calm and his thoughts slow, all his muscles go relaxed. They cuddle a lot like that, Jason all but completely crushing him and Leo holding him close. 

Right now he just sighs into the embrace, runs his fingers through his man's hair and over his back and waits for him to find the words he needs. It's okay, they have all the time in the world now.

“I woke up without you” Jason eventually says into his shoulder “It's the first time since-“

Since the night they got together, yeah that makes sense. Leo just hums in understanding and starts to scratch at Jason's scalp, the larger man gives a full-body shiver and relaxes more into him. More of his weight presses into Leo, it's almost enough to make him fall asleep, he turns his head to butt it into Jason’s and then plants a kiss into his hair.

“You're here though?” Jason asks in confirmation

“I’m here” he reassures “Sorry I scared you, you had a late night I was hoping to let you sleep”

“‘S okay” Jason sounds to also be falling asleep, scratchies will do that to him. If he could purr he would

“Common Superman” Leo stops his petting, Jason whines in protest “You’re putting me to sleep, if it's bedtime I at least need a pillow”

Jason huffs out a “Fine”, but when he sits up he pauses. He's looking down at Leo shirtless under him, and something new flashes across his face

“What?” Leo asks, arms by his head and still trapped under his man’s ass

“You’re pretty,” Jason tells him, the starch honesty making Leo laugh

“Pretty?” Leo can feel himself blushing “Isn’t that for girls?”

“No?” Jason is getting back in his space, caging in Leo instead of pressing into him, weight resting on his forearms on either side of Leo’s head “your always pretty, but especially right now”

“Under you?” He tries to sound teasing, but it’s definitely coming out breathy and giggly 

“Yeah” Jason sighs, and then there kissing 

Kissing is good, kissing is awesome even, they have been doing a lot of kissing lately. It feels partly like making up for lost time, partly addiction. Leo doesn’t really care either way, he's just so happy they finally made it to this point. 

It doesn't take long for Jason to break away to put his mouth on Leo’s neck and collar bones. Teeth seeking the soft parts of him in a way that makes Leo’s breath hitch. He's got his hands back in his man’s hair again, fingers reflexively tightening when Jason starts to suck a hickey below the entry point to his lightning scar. Jason moans into his skin at the sensation 

Jason is tracing the scar down with his mouth again, taking a new branch this time. When he reaches the exit just to the right of Leo’s navel Jason is back on his knees. He bites hard at the end of the scar, it makes Leo jerk up and yelp before breaking into chuckles at the sensitivity. He braces himself up on his elbows to look at the blond, looking very proud of himself over the edge of the mattress 

“Can I try something?” Jason asks, already moving Leo’s legs for him, pressing them open and settling in to get as close as possible 

“Something?” Leo questions, feeling the anticipation and vulnerability in the air

“I wanna put my mouth on you,” Jason kisses into the inside of Leo’s clothed thigh “Can I take these off?”

“Yeah sure okay,” Leo squeaks back, because how can he deny those electric blue eyes gazing at him like he hung the moon

‘Pretty’ Jason had called him, how he looks at Leo down there made him feel pretty

Jason is so pleased and excited by his answer he almost pulls Leo off of the bed with his sleep pants. Leo breaks into giggles as he tries to right himself, helping his man kick them off. Once they are gone Jason sticks his nose in the bend of Leo’s hip joint and breaths deep

“Are you really smelling me right now?” Leo laughs, it tickles a little

“Mabey” Jason mutters into his underwear, his ears are turning red and it's endlessly endearing. He presses a kiss to the elastic 

Leo can't help it, he breaks into more giggles. He feels all bubbly and giddy. The man of his dreams is blushing because he has his nose in his crotch, it's too much to handle without the joy bursting out of him like a freshwater spring. 

“Are you laughing at me?” Jason tries to grouch into the fabric, but he looks as giddy as Leo feels

“No?” Leo giggles back, he sits up more so he can get his hand in the other man's hair. Jason sighs as his fingers card through, turning his face more into his skin “You just make me happy, I love you”

They have said the L-word already, multiple times in fact, but it's still a rush every time. It looks to be the same for Jason, he's matching Leo’s giggles now, face flushing more and turning his eyes away like he's suddenly shy and not two inches from Leo’s dick. It's very cute, at least until he nips at the sensitive join of Leo’s leg

Leo yelps, because it both hurts and is also very hot. His hands reflexively clench in blond fluffy hair and the tug makes Jason groan. He really bites down then, tongue tracing over the elastic of Leo’s briefs 

“Fuck babe, you can just take them off” Leo whines. Jason, the little fucking shit, does so with his teeth 

He looks very pleased with himself too when he gets them off, he's lucky it's endearing. Sitting back on the balls of his feet with Leo’s fucking briefs in his mouth like a puppy, what an asshole looking so cute. Leo can't look at him, he flops backward onto the bed and throws an arm over his eyes, and wheezes out steam. Jason laughs at him, getting back between his legs to kiss at his hips again

“I'm gonna put my mouth on you,” Jason says ever so sincerely

“Your mouth has already been on me,” Leo whines in return “Your mouth has been on me all day! ”

“I'm gonna put my mouth on more of your” Jason chuckles back into the join of his leg and hip. He's moving Leo’s legs for him again, bending and pulling him where he wants him. Leo ends up with both knees resting on the blond's back and his hands under the curve of his lower back. It's so intimate and close, Jason so surrounded and holding his lower half it nearly knocks the breath out of his lungs. 

“Gods you're so pretty ” Jason all but begs “ Please can I get my mouth on you?”

“Please” Leo eeps back, and Jason moans at his consent hands gripping him tighter as he licks a long strip up him from root to head before taking him in deep 

They have been intimate before, they have been all over each other since the confession, but this part is new. It's been a lot of kissing and hands and dry humping so far, just desperately trying to merge into each other until they tumble over into some kind of competition. Here with Jason’s hyper-focus trained on Leo, his ridiculous oral fixation channeled into making him feel good, it makes Leo’s head spin

It's intense for lack of a better word, and better yet Jason seems to be enjoying himself. He's groaning into Leo’s every reaction, hands in a brushing grip where his hips meet waste and using his easy strength to keep Leo where he wants him. And where he wants him is as close as possible, slowly dragging Leo farther across the bed. 

When he comes it's with fire in his chest. Leo pulls his hands away so it doesn't spread, fisting the sheets by his shoulders, back arching hard and crying out his man's name. He can feel the flames searing a trail from his navel up into his hair, heating up the room and evaporating the sweat off his skin. How he keeps himself from setting both Jason and the bed on fire is beyond him

“Gods you're so pretty you're so good you're so pretty you're here ” Jason is murmuring like a prayer as he kisses his way back up Leo’s lightning scar. Leo has no clue how he's not burning his man with how hot his internal temperature must be, his breath is visible even with how balmy the room is. 

When Jason reaches his face again Leo turns away, too afraid that his superheated breath will burn the other man. Jason is having none of it, grabbing him by the chin and shoving his tongue into his mouth. Leo moans from it; whether it's the demanding treatment, the temperature difference of their mouths, or the fact that he can taste himself on his man he doesn't know. But it's needy and possessive and good , and he loses himself in Jason quickly 

“ Te amo, Te amo, Te amo,” he slurs into the kiss, trembling hands holding Jason’s jaw to keep him close, fingers patterning ‘I love you’ in morse code against his cheek. He just came but he feels pent up, about to burst, vibrating out of his skin. Jason must feel it too because he whimpers as his hips buck involuntarily 

“ Por que estas usando ropa? Quitate la pantalones ” he whines, kicking at the offending fabric “ Pantalones , Jason pantalones por favor ”

Jason seems to get the message, breaking away just far enough to shuck his soft sleep pants and kick them away. Leo’s hands won't leave him the whole time, making the whole endeavor more difficult and not even caring. Then they are flush together, skin to skin, and it's so good. 

Leo is riding that overstimulation, the pleasure and pain mixing together as Jason grinds out his relief into him, but he just wants more. He's begging for it in Spanish against his mouth, far too gone to try and code switch, and drunk on Jason Jason Jason. His man somehow gets his hand between their bodies with how close there pressed together and gets them both into a fist, Leo’s eyes take an all expensive paid trip to the back of his skull

Leo comes back to his body with Jason trying to pull away. That is incorrect, he tightens his hold around his man’s neck with all the strength he has left in him and holds on. Jason lets out a whine, but it's one of his concerned feral noises, and shoves his nose in Leo’s cheek. It's then that Leo realizes that he's been crying 

“ Estoy bien ” he croaks, struggling to verbalize with goo-brain “M’ okay”

“Here?” Jason questions

“Here” he confirms

Jason relaxes then. He presses his nose back into the tear tracks, snorts, licks it off his face, and then slams the bridge of his nose into the bend of Leo’s neck. Leo bubbles into giggles and pulls his man closer

[xfangheartx]

Summary- Blitzø and the gang face off against a giant hybrid monster!

WARNING: Minors, DO NOT INTERACT!!!

Preview:

  “QUICK!! THROUGH HERE!!!” Millie cried as she led the group through another door, and the beast known as “Sully” closed in on them. However, Moxxie screamed as he found himself being grabbed from behind by the leg as he clung to the door frame for dear life.

  “HELP!!” he cried as the chimera pulled on his leg. “I DON’T WANNA DIE FROM GROSS GIANT MONSTER SEX!!!”

  “MOXX!!!” Millie yelled as she grabbed her husband by the hands with Loona and Buffy helping her pull.

  “LET GO OF HIM, YOU HORNY, DINOSAUR-FACED FUCKER!!!” Blitzø yelled as he shot his flintlock at the beast, which roared as it was struck in the eye, causing it to let Moxxie go as they slammed the door behind them, and even blocked it with crates and filing cabinets for good measure.

  “Are you okay, Moxxie?!” Buffy asked.

  “My life flashed before my eyes!!” Moxxie cried as he clung to Millie.

  “Man… and I thought Ozz had a huge dick!” Blitzø exclaimed between pants.

XXX

  Asmodeus froze as he sat in his bathtub before he looked around suspiciously, and suddenly, Fizz emerged from the bubbles, wearing a snorkel and scuba goggles.

  “What’s up, babe?” Fizz asked. “Everything okay?”

  “Uh…” Ozzie muttered before he shrugged. “Eh… probably nothin’.”

  “If you say so,” Fizz shrugged. “Now, where was I…? Oh, right!” He put the snorkel back in his mouth before he dove back into the water… and Ozzie yelped as he felt something grab onto his nether region.

  “Easy, Froggie!” he cried.

  “Sorry,” Fizz said as he came back up.

XXX

  Loona carefully opened the door and took a look around, but she couldn’t see the beast anywhere.

  “I think that freak is gone,” she said as she opened the door completely.

  “Yeah, for now,” Blitzø said as he looked around, too. “But man, did you see the SIZE of that thing?!”

  “I did,” Buffy answered, “and it gave me really bad flashbacks!”

  “Blitzø, what do we do?” Millie asked. “And if we get dicked by that thing, we’re goners!”

  “Yeah, that’s probably what happened to those poor bastards,” said Blitzø. “What the fuck made these people think that making THAT thing was a good idea?!”

  “Um… sir?” Moxxie asked as he held open a file. “I think I might have found something.”

  As Blitzø looked at the file, he noticed that it was filled with photos of different animals and documents detailing the process of the experiment.

  “It looks like they were doing some sort of DNA-splicing experiments,” said Moxxie. “They were working on creating some sort of animal soldier, but their funding was cut, forcing them to do their research through illegal means.”

  “Yeah, and a fuck load of good that did,” said Loona. “Now we’re trapped with a huge, horny monster!”

  “Horny is right,” Moxxie said as he looked over the file. “It seems that when they made that monster, they injected it with gorilla hormones to make it stronger… but now, it’s sexually charged, almost constantly!”

  “Oh, that's just fucking brilliant!” Blitzø cursed. “God, don't these humans watch The Thing ?! Everyone knows making shit like this is just one big clusterfuck!! Why do they play with fucking fire?!”

[phenomenal1500]

~The Gallows~

Masterlist

A/N: This was requested by mocn_knight on Wattpad! ♥️♥️

Summary: Charles finds out he got the woman he is now locked up with pregnant, right before their execution.

Timeline: Season 3.

Pairing: Captain Charles Vane x Preg!Fem!Reader Warnings: Angst, smut talk, fluff, gallows talk.

Y/N pressed her sore back against the cold wall behind her as she sat down, remembering the man in front of her all too well. She remembered his growls, his weight on her, his scent. Everything. If she didn't know any better he might've been able to convince her by the way he pleased her that he might've loved her, but she knew that wasn't the case. Not at all really.

And so that was why she hid her secret from him.... He didn't need to know.

She could already guess how he would've reacted to the news if she did tell him and she didn't mind doing it on her own anyway.

She didn't need help because besides him perhaps not liking the idea, she knew he also probably would've thought she betrayed him. She had promised him to clean herself and she did, it was just done too late. Having his child was never her plan, never her intention.

"Y/N?"

'Shit', she thought. She kinda hoped he would've forgotten about her by now. She wasn't the only woman he had after all.

"Y/N? They cut off your tongue?" He repeated and her eyes shot up to meet his blue ones.

"No, they haven't. I was trying to come up with an escape plan in my head." She shrugged and tried to remain calm. She was so incredibly nervous. She really didn't want him to find out, but it wasn't like she was in her first semester anymore either. "I'm not going to rot away in a dungeon or hang above the streets like a trophy."

"I feel like it's too late for that." He looked her up and down, noticing she was wearing wider clothes which she wasn't known for. 'They are in the way during a fight'. Her words. "There's one window neither of us fit through and the door is locked and heavily guarded. This time it is going to be the gallows for us, love."

'Love?', he never called her that before....

"No, I don't believe that for one second and I know neither do you. You're a good man, Charles, you wouldn't give up like that." She couldn't believe he was this easily defeated. Not a few days back he would've never surrendered to those men out there so she was stunned at what happened to him. "You're strong, intelligent, a captain we need out there fighting for Nassau and our freedom. You'll find a way."

"Not this time." He cut her off and she watched him with hurt eyes.

Was he really done fighting...?

"On your feet!" One of the redcoats ordered as they unlocked the door and came inside, disturbing the heartbreaking conversation the pirates were having.

"Backs against the wall!" Another ordered and shoved Y/N against the wall when she wasn't moving fast enough, the first redcoat stopping him right away with a slap on the back of his head and a tug at his collar.

"Careful you fucker, she might be a pirate, but the cunt is carrying." He growled. "We are ordered to wait until she has the bastard before we can execute her."

"My child isn't a bastard." She hissed back in defense and they just laughed right in her face as they let the maidens safely bring them their daily rotting food before they left and locked the door again.

"Child...?" Charles whispered, looking down at the woman's stomach. "You're carrying...?"

"Forget what they said...." She slowly sat down again and placed the rotting bread in her lap so she could eat a little.

"I don't think I can." He instantly replied and walked up to her, slowly getting on his knees in front of her to make eye contact with her. "Is it mine...?"

"You're all I.... yeah.... I'm certain it is." She sighed and rubbed the back of her neck, looking at him nervously. "I'm sorry, Charles. I swear I did everything to prevent it."

"I know you did, Y/N, don't apologize." He rubbed her thighs and moved up to her lower stomach to caress the bump a little. "We'll figure something out." He gave her a soft glare and she relaxed a little by how soothing he talked to her.

He could've been mad about the news, yell at her for letting it happen, but what good was that gonna do? He knew the woman was terrified and never planned any of this to happen and he definitely didn't want to worsen those negative feelings for her. It was his child too after all and so he needed to take care of it, help her as much as he could and perhaps it wasn't even gonna be so bad. Perhaps he could combine his lifestyle with being a father and help her settle down after this war with Rogers was over. He owed her that.

"We can't figure something out since you were right. We can't get out of here. They'll send our baby to London to a wealthy abusive family while we're both hanging over our island like a trophy...."

"No we won't." He kissed her forehead and got up. "I'm sure you and I can think of something. I ain't gonna die, knowing that that means our child will grow up exactly like the men we hate the most. They deserve to figure out who their parents were and where they came from."

"You promise?" She smiled weakly, holding one of his hands.

"I promise, we're getting out of here, love."

[seven-stars-in-his-palm]

20 Questions for Fic Writers ‼️

HI @callipraxia the bond continues to endure. i love questions!!!! let us go...

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 29, though i've orphaned a few in my day.

2. What's your total word count? ao3 claims 268,182, but oh boy do i have wips waiting in the tank. probably something like 300k adding all those up

3. What fandoms do you write for? i used to write exclusively gravity falls (20 including orphaned works) but now i've started doing good omens (11) as well. i try to balance them ☝️also one fic from nimona that is surprisingly my most popular fic?? mannn

4. Top 5 fics by kudos: Pyrite and Sunrise (230), Midnight's Call (126), Twin (s Up In) Flames (109), Loose Ties & Ends (107), and The Wonders of the Twin Paradox Theory (106).

5. Do you respond to comments? i always try to respond as quickly as i can and to everyone because i must let them know i appreciate them. they give me so much life

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? HMMMM there's many choices... not for good omens considering i physically can't give them an unhappy ending at the moment (final fifteen) but gravity falls is ALWAYS game. its between Unfortunate Ends and Burn Fast, Burn Bright, which both have ford ending up truly dead in a gruesome way. i love it sm

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? fics where crowley and aziraphale end up at the south downs are SUCH strong contenders. so its between (again) would you lie with me and just forget the world and to hold you like a bouquet. those are fr bangers

8. Do you get hate on fics? not that i know of!! (knock on wood)

9. Do you write smut? i've never been for that life, nor do i think i have the talent lmao

10. Craziest crossover? i don't write much crossover so there's not much to say, but my god that one gravity falls x miracukous ladybug fic had so much potential. might go back to it one day to give it the skill, lesbians, and coheisive narrative it rightfully deserved ☝️‼️

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? also not that i know of!! KNOCK ON WOOD

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? ALSO also not that i know of!!! i would deff like to see some of my fics translated in spanish (my first language but you'd have never known that) however, because that would kill my ass. i'd love to see how my metaphors and prose would translate into that language bc i already have some ideas but i'd never be able to sit my ass down and actually do it 💀

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? too scared to do that bc how would that even work?? but i'd love to give it a try!!

14. All-time favorite ship? BROOO its between fiddauthor and the ineffable husbands im sorry. they may not be equal narratively but they'll always have my hearts

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? godddddd i wish i could pick but all of my truly abandoned babies i WISH i could finish so BADLY. so i wont name them, just know anything i condeded defeat on im SO SORRY. i plan to never do it again NO MATTER WHAT!!! ☝️

16. What are your writing strengths? writing humorously. i think i've nailed the focusing on not necessarily important details and describing things in an aloof and humorous manner that fits just right in both the gravity falls and good omens worlds. if that makes sense. also drama!! i love drama

17. What are your writing weaknesses? dialogue and action scenes, ironically enough. i never know how those fuckers would say that

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language? ONE THOUSAND PERCENT (if it makes sense naratively). if one of the characters is a bilingual, i would love to see their 2nd language in action. i live for that shit in fiction and real life too

19. First fandom you ever wrote in? gravity falls baybeeee!!! i wrote about it long before i came on ao3, and the first work i ever wrote has been orphaned (but i HAVE rewrote it in the form of dimension 18'\ lmao) but it is my BABY!!!!!

20. Favorite fic you ever wrote? WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE. weeeeell....either do you remember hanging up the stars or midnight's call. longest fics i've ever written (or plan to write ig) and they have PLOT and DEVELOPMENT and LIFE and SO MANY COOL MOMENTS i need them injected in my brain. oifjfh. forever proud 🗣🗣

OKAY im gon a tag the writer mutuals because i need to tag SOMEONE in these posts... @fearandhatred @crowleys-bentley-and-plants @unearthlyfromage @sabotage-on-mercury @ineffabildaddy @fellshish @zephrunsimperium @oriocookie @jacky-rubou alright i need sleep now. thanks for playing i had alot of fun :)

[imglowinginthedarkness]

currently 2am and i can't tell if i'm having one of those delirious late night old hyperfixation comebacks that go away when i finally succumb to sleep or if it really is coming back full force and knocking me over like a 13ft high ocean wave. said hyperfixation is undertale.

anyways, my dear favorite sans enjoyer (you) immediately came to mind. name everything you love about this skeleton man GO

BEE. OUUGHGHGH BEE YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOUVE JUST UNLEASHED. EVERYPNE SHUT UP I GOTTA TALK ABOUT MY BOY

god bro i literally cannot express how much i love sans the skeleton. like really and genuinely in every which way he is my Favorite Fucking Guy. ages ago my friends and i had a simp-based slideshow night where we made presentations about our biggest fictional crushes/hyperfixations and i made mine into a tier list bc i love putting things into arbitrary categories and the last tier was "category F: the final frontier (I’m pretty sure I’m going to be on my actual fucking deathbed before I get over these fuckers)” and guess who was #1 on the list babyyyy

but besides all the silly sentimental reasons why i like him so much, i just. genuinely he's such a good fuckin character. UT is a game with a fucking MEGALOAD of excellent characters designed in a lab to steal ur heart and sans is no exception. his introduction is so god damn good in terms of characterization. when you (frisk) first enter the underground proper, the only other character (besides flowey/napstablook technically) you've gotten to know at that point is toriel, and you just finished battling her specifically because she was trying to stop you from going through the door. you don't know anything about this new area except what toriel has told you/implied, that it's dangerous and full of monsters who are not your friends, who will try to kill you without a second thought. as you the player step into the snow, the background music is silent, there isn't any sort of comfort from the knowledge that you are now stuck in this new place without toriel's protection/guidance (not to mention your encounter with flowey and the fact that you can't get back into the ruins). the only thing you (frisk) can do is go forward, so you do. you start walking. it's quiet. it's cold. you're alone. and then you start to hear footsteps. you pass a stick on the ground, and the second it's out of view of you (the player), you hear someone (something?) step on it and break it. if you go back to look, no one's there. you're about to reach a small bridge when there's more footsteps, and suddenly you can't move, which is an absolutely terrible thing to happen when you're playing a video game. the footsteps get closer. a voice speaks, slow and purposeful. "human. don't you know how to greet a new pal? turn around, and shake my hand." you don't really have a choice. you turn, you take the figure's hand– and then there's a fucking FART NOISE and instantly the tension is completely fucking broken. it's like a dark cloud is lifted off of you. the music comes back in (sans' theme, bouncy and silly and perfect for him) and you see sans fully for the first time and he's this round dorky little funnyman with the biggest grin of all time and he switches up instantly, becoming a comedic relief character after essentially faking you out as your first “boss battle”. doing this is so freaking smart because it is a perfect showcase of sans as a character, not just hinting at his real level of power while also showing that he is at his core just a funnyman, but also exemplifying his primary strategy when it comes to avoiding conflict. he purposefully scares you, and then lifts the tension by revealing he's not here to hurt you, and that sense of relief makes you instantly trust him a little more. he starts his true introduction off with a joke, not just lowering your guard and making you underestimate him a little but also making you like him more and feel more at ease. not to mention it's the exact opposite of flowey's intro which is just such a cool additional thing. it's so good. it's sooo good.

and that's not even touching his relationship w papyrus, his connection to toriel and alphys, the fact that if you reset after defeating him in the genocide run, he could literally kill you the moment he meets you again (and he'd have every understandable reason to do so) but he chooses not to because at his core he WANTS to give you a chance, he wants to believe that even the worst person can change. not only that but in the genocide run he watches you kill his brother, the most important person in his life, and he STILL doesn't take action because he's holding out hope that you'll make the decision to stop on your own. it's only when you reach the judgment hall and you've killed almost every single other character that he finally decides to fight you himself because he's essentially accepted that you're not going to stop unless he stops you, and even then he knows he can't stop you! he only has 1 god damn hit point!! so he hits you with his biggest move right at the start, hoping that'll kick the wind out of you and make you stop trying to get past him, and then when that doesn't work, he dodges and dodges and dodges until he is literally falling asleep on his feet from pure exhaustion, until he's been fighting so long he physically cannot keep going. like it's framed as him going to sleep but let's be real, it's him passing out from fucking dodging and throwing everything but the kitchen sink at you for fucking ages, and his final resort is stalling you, but eventually his exhaustion catches up to him and you get the opportunity to attack him again. but even then he dodges your first attack, probably out of adrenaline, only to run right into your second because he's so fucking tired, he can't keep doing this, he's so tired.

like dude, i know, i kNOW he is funny haha skeleton but he is also genuinely such a good fucking character. he is silly and goofy but also so, so heartbreaking, lazy and yet so so smart, a silly little guy who loves his brother and who didn't ask to be so aware of the resets but he is and because he is he takes it upon himself to become the judge, to watch over you and if necessary make sure you don't take a step outside that hall. he's my fucking favorite dude. i could go on but this is already way way way too long. tl:dr i love him <3

[hellaversity]

The New Job

"You are an idiot! How can you be a skilled assassin with such a high body count and still be so incompetent at your job? You're fired!" Crimson yelled so loudly with resentment in his voice. Striker just grunted at him with anger. "It isn't my fault those imps have privelege, Blitzo with his blueblood cum dumpster, Fizzarolli with his goody-two-shoes celebrity status and literal sin of a boyfriend. They have it easy compared to me," Striker said, trying to make excuses for his failure.

"Don't care, Indiana. Just fuck off and never step in my house. You're not getting paid for this," Crimson sneered while sitting down in his mafia throne and sipping a cup of coffee. "Al!" He called out to Alessio, his top bodyguard and right-hand man. Alessio grabbed Striker by the tail, picking him up and carrying him to the front door and throwing him outside of the mafia mansion, locking the door.

Striker was so pissed off and ashamed of himself that he felt like screaming at the top of his lungs about how much Crimson sucks. Yet for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to do it. He just ran away from the mansion as far as possible, even passing his trusty horse Bombproof without noticing. Bombproof noticed his owner and ran towards him, wondering what was wrong. "Don't worry about me, Bombproof," Striker said as he mounted his horse and took off.

10 minutes later.....

Striker arrived at the Goetia palace to deliver the bad news to his boss, Stella. He knew that crazy bird lady wasn't gonna take it well. "Well, here goes nothing," he whispered before kicking the door open. Unexpectedly, Stella was standing right in front of him and the door slammed into her face. It made Striker chuckle, but soon enough realized that wasn't a good idea.

"STRIKER!!! YOU NOT ONLY FAIL TWICE TO KILL THAT PUSSY TWINK OF AN OWL, BUT NOW YOU SHOW UP AT MY HOUSE UNINVITED AND SLAM THE DOOR IN MY FACE?!?!" His boss shouted at him, so loudly that it almost woke up the whole palace. "Ma'am, that Blitzø fucker and his two diabetes ass having friends stopped me both times. Clearly it's not that simple."

Striker tried to explain, but Stella couldn't care less. "GET THE FUCK OUT AND NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN!!! YOU!! ARE!! FIRED!!!!" Stella yelled again, even louder this time. It actually woke up the imp butler, Pringles, who was sleeping on the living roon couch. "Hey, can you keep it down?" Striker just left without saying another word. He didn't wanna deal with that woman's annoying screaming and childish temper tantrums any longer.

"Just fucking great. Two headaches in a row. From now on, I go my own way," the wrathian cowboy said to himself. He mounted Bombproof and just took off, not knowing or caring where he was going. As long as it was far away from both Crimson and Stella, that was all that mattered to him at the moment.

2 hours later.....

Striker went back at his own hideout in Wrath. He didn't even bother to tell those annoying mariachi imps to shut up and stop singing about him, because he was just too tired to do so. He just waited for the song to be over and turned off the radio before hitting the sack in his old tent, on his old sleeping bag. "Damn fanboys of mine," he whispered in annoyance. He told them millions of times to stop singing about him every time he came back to the hideout, but they never listened to him.

He closed his eyes and dreamed of his now long gone parents. His father was a rattlesnake like demon who was bald, had a long and pointy snout, sharp teeth, tannish beige skin and red spines on his tail with a rattle at the very end. His mother, who was an imp with horns curved just like her son's, just with a female pattern, and black stripes on her tail.

Striker treasured both of his parents very dearly, and part of the reason he hates those pompous bluebood fops known as the Ars Goetia so much is because one of them had killed both of his parents. Which made Striker wonder why he was willing to work for one of those stupid birds. Stella was no different from the rest of them.

"I'm glad I don't have to work for her anymore," Striker uttered in his sleep. Getting fired by that peacock bitch was actually the best thing to have ever happened to him. Besides, he didn't need her anyway. He could easily kill Stolas himself as long as he had those angelic weapons given to him by the leader of the overlord sinners, Carmilla Carmine. He could always go to her if he needed more.

The next morning.....

Striker woke up and put out the fire next to his tent. He mounted Bombproof and took the hellavator that traveled through all seven rings to Pride, the center of Pentagram City in particular. "Good thing it ain't Imp City with all those lowlife imps," he muttered. He stepped out of the hellavator and took a deep breath, hoping not to run into that Stella bitch again.

Suddenly, a tall and muscular incubus with a mohawk ran into Striker and said "Watch, it buddy!" "Why don't you watch where you're going, prick?" Striker retorted. "Oh, you want a piece of me? Bring it on, motherfucker!" Said the incubus as he put his fists up at Striker and taunted him, obviously looking for a fight. Striker was about to take out an angelic pistol until a feminine voice he didn't recognize called out "Stop it, Ace!"

Ace looked behind him to see his boss, the famous popstar Verosika Mayday. He took his hands off Striker like she asked, and the cowboy was enamored with her. He knew she looked familiar, since he saw her in magazines before. But he just couldn't remember what her name was. "Aw, that's a shame. I was hoping to see Ace beat the shit outta the guy!" Said another incubus standing next to Verosika. He had white hair and a very gothy look to him.

"I would've kicked his ass if the boss let me," said Ace as he walked over to the other and put an arm around his shoulder. From the looks if it, those two were a couple. "Don't mind Ace. He likes to go around proving how tough he is by picking fights with other guys. And his boyfriend Josh over there kisses his ass all the time" said Verosika. "Yeah, I can tell. Hey, aren't you that succubus who makes cheesy pop songs about shitty ex-boyfriends and bad breakups?" Striker asked her.

Ace and Josh started laughing. Verosika glared at them and they became silent. "Yeah, that's me. Verosika Mayday's the name," she told Striker. "I gotta say, your latest hit Over You isn't too bad," Striker said. That comment made Verosika blush. "Hey, this is boring. Let's go back to the boss' studio and have sex with each other," Josh said to Ace. "As you say, honey," Ace replied as they left.

Verosika looked back at the handsome cowboy she was attracted to. "So, do you mind if I take you to The Richest Cup? They sell the best coffee and beer there," she said. "Not at all," he replied. They held each other's hands and walked to The Richest Cup just down the street. They chose a table for two and sat down. "I haven't been to this place in six years since I took my dickhead of an ex-boyfriend here," said Verosika.

"How many asshole ex-bofriends do you have?" Striker asked. Verosika cleared her throat before exolaining it all. "Just one. He was an imp named Blitzø, and I thought I loved him at the time. Even got a tattoo of his name on my arm. But I guess I fell for him too quickly, and he bailed on me in such an awful way. Stealing my credit card and spending it on horse riding lessons. Glad I never have to see him again."

"Blitzø? Imp? I met him before. He's fucking some pompous Goetia like the loser he is. Probably mooching off him, too," said Striker. Verosika chuckled. "I'm glad we feel the sane way about him," she said. "May I take your order?" Asked the waitress, who just came up to their table. Verosika and Striker both looked at the menu. "Just a beelzejuice, please," she replied. "And i'd just like a latte," Striker replied. The waitress nodded and left the table to get their drinks.

"So, tell me. How did you get that scar on your right eye?" Verosika asked. Striker flinched. He hated being reminded of that scar he got from being caught on fire after his failed attempt to kill Blitzø and Fizzarolli. "It was after I failed to do my job. Being an assassin hired by two people to kill both Stolas and Blitzø. Three times. Both of them fired me and I got manhandled," Striker explained.

Verosika didn't know what to say, but she did feel sorry for Striker. She didn't even care that much about him saying he tried to kill Stolas or Fizzarolli because she wasn't all that close to them anyway. She even appreciated his attempt to kill Blitzø. "I'm sorry to hear that. I can hire you," she said to cheer him up. "Not sure how i'd feel about being part of a cheesy pop band," said Striker.

"Oh, you don't have to be IN the band. You could be our tattoo artist who dies assassin jobs when we're off duty," Verosika said. "That doesn't sound too bad. Maybe i'll consider it," Striker replied. The waitress came back with their beelzejuice and latte, which they both took a sip of before holding each other's hands and gazing at each with half-lidded eyes.

5 minutes later.....

They finished their drinks and left the diner while holding each other with their arms around the shoulders. "I gad a good time. Did you?" Verosika asked. "Hell yeah. Best time i've had in years," Striker answered. "Well, it was nice meeting you. I don't think you told me your name yet." "It's Striker. And it was nice to meet you too, Miss Mayday," he said. She kissed him on the cheek before going her own way, which made him blush. He was definitely considering working for her now.

THE END

[nvrcmplt]

"You don't scream like the rest, tell me, darling. Are you not scared of what I can do?? I could easily rip you into pieces like I did with the others when I fed your insides to my pets."

The creature leans in, hot breath to the nape of their neck as he gleefully watched his captive, the shadow tendrils bounding them, in case they're likely to do something foolish.

The talon fingers roughly grabbed at their chin, raising them up so they're looking at him only. "What would you do if I carve my name in your skin??" The pointy tip draws blood against their skin, watching it blossom like a flower.

"Do you wish to be mine? Or should I eat you from the inside??" (Shadow @ tyler)

It wasn't a lie, though he wasn't screaming at seeing what he was, it wasn't the worse, which was odd to say. It was terrifying, really was, to point Tyler was sure his bladder would of emptied itself here and now if he had anything left in the tank. Instead, he was trying to keep focused, a practice most Witches go through. Working with blood, guts, gore was a common sight - to bury hands into the heart of buck chests, to dismantle bones and muscle, sometimes it was just draining rodents for their blood into pots and things. It was a odd profession being a Witch and yet - sights like these still unsettle the heart.

As his nape was breathed on, fear tickled his skin in goosebumps, his lungs seized in an inhale but his lashes flutter to keep them low. To keep his mind cantered, chanting within his mind, silent and steady - to not stop because he knew the moment he did would be the moment he vomits. Wrists snagged, body bound and heart pounding in his ears, the Candlewitch couldn't understand how the fuck he came to be here? Was it a drink? A blink in the shadows? Something triggered him being here with these other unsavable folks but he had a feeling, this guy - the man that was closing in on him, talking and even touching his face…

Didn't know he was a Witch.

As his cheek was pierced with a sharp gentleness that warmed over with his old blood, Tyler felt his throat dry out. Ah, shit. This guy was insane, completely and yet, Tyler felt the fear cool his fingertips and toes, inhale through his nose and looking down to try and not succumb to their stare, even reply - not until he finished his mantra in mind. It was hard, since he winced at the pain of his cheek soon triggering an itch, stringing from the clear bacteria on that talon. Shit, shit, shit… Slow, steady - slow and steady, slow… Inhaling once more, Tyler lifted his gaze - the sea greens shimmering with a new found answer.

"Sorry… but no thanks." As his lips part, smoke wisps as if a drake was to breathe flame, but it was just a part of Tyler's core, a part of who and what he was. As his old blood ignited, the droplets on those talons began to ignite with its freedom, weeping the pricked cut close in a burn. "Salamander." An utter of a clever beast, a quick thing, a creature that near enough crawled out of Tyler's throat - rested upon his tongue only to open it's slimy maw and expel a flame thick enough to cover the close fuckers face. As his skin took on a sheen that mimicked the small beast, Tyler twisted his wrists, hoping the slick would allow him to slip free of the tendrils that held him so easily - but it wasn't so he could run.

He had no idea where he was, so he was going to do what Witches did best… Protect themselves with any means necessary - after all, Tyler only needed one hand to slip free to swipe at his own blood and mark it over his chest in a sigil of Celtic protection. Swift and at ease, did it turn into a blinding veil, a curtain of morning dawn in the dark place as he held the Salamander from his mouth upon palm now. "Burn it down, Salamander. Let these people rest in peace." Ah - yeah, Tyler wasn't thinking that he'll make it out alive, but he would take this bastard down with him if he had too.

"Svarog Flame." Uttered as the Salamander once more began to inhale deep, vomiting heavier flames, thicker flames, hotter and hotter and hotter flames…

[jonmyblaze]

Hellsing x Castlevania Fanfic idea

Julius (Morris-)Belmont joins the HELLSING Organization. Part one

Julie's Belmont spent the beginning of his 19th year of Life job hunting

the war of demon Castle of 1999, (which is only months away by his families calculation) left him no time to have a normal life training with vampire killer and how to survive vampire attacks was his primary upbringing Aside from his American School life

Right now he was touring England (more like , bumming it through) looking for a job fit and only 19 years old it should be easy. And he found exactly the one

H.E.L.L.S.I.N.G.

Her

Royal

England

Legions and

Legitimate

Supernatural

Immortal

Night

Guard

More commonly known as the Royal Order of Protestant Knight.

It was a quiet organization in the Anglican Church funded by the monarchy itself as a way to protect itself from supernatural forces most people don't know about it for good reason.

As the son of the Union between the Belmont clan and the Morris family it was very easy to recognize what the organization meant.(it's highly secretive organization but MI6 was willing to point out a Belmont in London, and leave enough clues to point a Belmont to the organization.

One of the biggest clues to what the organizations true intentions and purpose was simply looking at the true founders of the org.

Jonathan and Mina Harker

Jonathan Stewart

Abraham Van Helsing

Arthur homewood.

Quincy Morris(Julius's maternal ancestor)

Technically Julius could potentially join as a legacy to one of the founders and make easy money as a shareholder however that's not why he was there.

Julius wanted the experience. And he would get it in the Hellsing organization. But first he had to go to the leader herself in order to apply seeing as he was pretty young

Sir. INTEGRA FAIRBROOK WINGATE (Harker~) HELLSING. Leader of the Hellsing organization.

(granddaughter of" Quincy" John Abraham Arthur Harker & the adopted daughter of Lord Godalming and biological daughter of Abraham "Lucy" Wilhelmina Holmwood hellsing)

( She is the daughter of Arthur quincy John Harker Hellsing and a Indian(desi) woman

(A/n:I am sorry I do not have the name of her mother blame Hirano)

------

You stupid mother fucker, You asshole arrogant fuck' Sir. Integra was beyond annoyed, Enrico Maxwell and A lot of those Iscariot really found a way to get on her nerve, But but alucard sending death threats to the Pope by carrier pigeon? That was just baffling.

Maxwell not a few minutes ago. (He had came to complain about the pigeons

She had stayed in that damn restaurant, reading all of bizarrely worded death threats the pope was sent..

She’ll give the man one credit. He knew how to write a death threat, A creative one. No two letter was the same.. She almost wondered jokingly, ‘was he the sole reason why the carrier pigeon industrie still survived? Preposterous.’

At that very moment, a new person had decided to make an entrance.

A man..

He looks rather young, couldn't have been more than early 20s...

The man

No, a more like boy walked in from the glass doors. interrupting her quiet contemplation of killing her own vampire.

His outfit was rather bizarre, compared to the Victorian cowboy of Alucard. Thiswas a regular cowboy, But for modern times giant coat.

The boy had a red bandana around his neck, really big cowboy boots, overcoat the dress vest All wrapped up in long brown dusty trench coat

how the hell did he get into this establishment?

(young Julius Belmont fanart by junkisakuraba)

Continued in part 2

Author's note (this is an outline I am trying to make for Tumblr )

But this is essentially three-part crossover between Bram stoker's Dracula, Hellsing and Castlevania

I am rewriting parts of the Hellsing Lore and Castlevania Lore that I don't care for (particularly Mina and her fate. Jonathan X Mina for life

Adding in Quincy's survival and his family continuing into the Morris clan

Making the Morris clan distinct from the Belmonts that acquired Vampire killer during the American Civil War) as opposed to being an offshoot.