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dearest-painter · 2 months ago

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Hey there! I don't know if you remember me, but I was the anon who sent you a thing a few months ago to warn you and others about the more abhorrent actions of the artist Namy Gaga (https://www.tumblr.com/dearest-painter/747620174237138944/so-sorry-to-bother-you-but-i-saw-someone-in-a?source=share).

In light of recent events, I felt like doing a follow-up was one of the best things to do since:

I discovered some new information that I wasn't aware of at the time.

Certain events have happened which completely caught me off guard.

Content warning for discussions of victim-blaming, harassment, inappropriate/illegal NSFW artwork, and toxic behaviour (including but not limited to queerphobia).

I discovered a Tumblr account Namy or a fan made in July last year (coincidentally around the time of the victim's lawsuit). I initially theorised it was created to mock any critics Namy had on that platform. As of me writing this, the blog has changed. BUT it has the same username as before (which you can easily find while searching "Namy Gaga" or "Namy G" on here), CONFIRMING THAT SHE DID IN FACT MAKE THAT ACCOUNT TO INITIALLY HARASS PEOPLE.

Originally, I talked about a comic she made in 2018 where she was gatekeeping LGBTQ+ experiences. As of me writing this, she still has not taken it off her Deviantart (I have the link to prove this - please avoid the comments for your mental health as a lot of them are either argumentative, gross or blatantly transphobic: https://www.deviantart.com/namyg/art/LGBT-Correct-answer-Meme-757868018). I did see someone speculate that Namy may have had internalised queerphobia at the time (due to how some people with internalised queerphobia tend to police other people's queerness), but I am also aware that someone who is LGBTQ+ can police other people's queerness and NOT have internalised queerphobia (perhaps there are other reasons OR they're just a you-know-what). That's just my opinion tho and I'm open to hear yours (if you want ofc).

As of me writing this, she has opened up about being genderfluid and still identifies as sapphic/queer (not specifically lesbian tho). While a part of me wants to believe that Namy has grown from her past queerphobic actions and opinions, I am of the firm belief that just because someone is LGBTQ+ (regardless of their experiences or the terms they use) doesn’t excuse/dismiss bad behaviour. - from a bisexual person with multiple LGBTQ+ friends

Remember when I talked about a Google Drive that Namy made to paint one of her victims as a liar - using actual screenshot evidence (of text conversations, etc.) that could definitely look incriminating in a court of law (if the victim's initial lawsuit were to progress any further, which I haven't found any updates about as of me writing this). TURNS OUT THERE WAS A CRUCIAL DETAIL I DIDN'T MENTION WITHIN THAT GOOGLE DRIVE. Specifically, a recorded call (video format) between Namy and one of the voice actors for her FNAF AU project, which she put up in March 2024. While I cannot understand Spanish and there were not English subtitles, what I could understand was that Namy was trying to confront the voice actor about the victim "cheating on her with them” when the victim was most likely trying to confide in the voice actor and tell them what Namy was doing to her.

Speaking of which, as of July this year, Namy has privated the Google Drive that she released in December 2023 (probably to cover her backside legally, bc of backlash from her critics, reasons which I've detailed below, or all three).

Within the same month, Namy posted a vent drawing (her current self punching her "old self") both on her Devianart and Facebook: https://www.deviantart.com/namyg/art/Namy-G-vs-Namy-Gaga-1079871130. Attached was a paragraph explaining that, upon going to see a therapist, she realised that her actions from 2023 and before (some of which I detailed previously - including the inappropriate/illegal NSFW) were unacceptable and that she has since apologised for those behaviours. IF THIS IS TO BE BELIEVED, I HAVE THIS MESSAGE FOR NAMY ON THE OFF-CHANCE SHE READS THIS: I understand that you want to unlearn toxic behaviours, to unlearn transphobic and other queerphobic mindsets, and to unlearn the idea that promoting inappropriate/illegal NSFW on public platforms is normal (since I’m of the belief you may have been desensitised/pressured into thinking it was normal). And I admire/respect that desire to change. But it WILL take a really long time and a lot of effort for people to forgive you, especially the people you hurt (if they're inclined to forgive you at all). I’m not accusing you of being Satan or anything like that, but no amount of learning from the incidents regarding the queerphobia, the narcissism and the NSFW artwork is going to change this fact: YOU STILL BROKE THE LAW IN YOUR OWN COUNTRY TWICE, NO MATTER HOW YOU TRY TO PAINT IT. Even IF it is true your first victim forgave you, you will NOT be immune to the law and someone will eventually report you. And about one of your newest posts on your Tumblr: WHY ARE YOU ACTING SURPRISED WHEN YOUR SECOND VICTIM STILL TELLS HER AUDIENCE THAT YOU HURT HER?! IF her lawsuit does progress and you end up being convicted in court (with the evidence YOU used to paint her as the “bad guy”), don’t be surprised if you get jail time.

I apologise for my strong wording in that last point, but I felt it was important to address.

Hope you have a good day/evening and thank you for reading this lengthy update. If you have any thoughts on this, I’m open to hearing them as well.

(To the anyone else reading this, PLEASE DO NOT HARASS/CONTACT NAMY’S FAMILY OR HER CURRENT PARTNER AS THEY (TO MY KNOWLEDGE) HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH ALL OF THIS.)

Thank you for informing me and I do not have any thoughts other than I appreciate you making it known and at least making light to it. Also as Anon said, do not harass or contact Namy’s family or her partner as there is no proof any of them have done any of it or participated

#✉️mail arrived✉️#genderfluid enity answers!

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sapphire-weapon · 1 year ago

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I used to draw for other small/rare ships (apparently I'm drawn to those kind of ships lol), only one of them got huge enough after they were given some time alone in the manga which got the ship more talented and known creators and amazing fan art.

Unfortunately it also got more hate on since it was a ship that "got in the way" of other huge popular ships and going through the tag got annoying bc the haters tagged every post shitting on the previously rare pairing, plus if you reblogged or made content for it they would harass you. I just blocked everyone sending me hate lmao.

Lots of people now hate Leon/Ashley but I think this increased hatred also shows how the haters can see that it is a thing now unlike before. They see it as a real threat. You can see the insecurity in some of those antis, it's too obvious and also just sad imo. I don't get why antis take shipping too seriously like they're not even having fun anymore and that's supposed to be the point, no?

Truth is I've seen so many Leon/Ashley fans online and even irl, Reddit for example loves it and Remake Ashley is a fan favorite now. A lot of them are more casual fans that maybe don't engage that deeply with fanon (which tbh is the smart thing to do).

Finally I have to say your blog and the amazing fic writers have inspired me to go back to drawing fan art and just creating content for Ashley/Leon or EagleOne. :)

Since this is my new otp and the only thing I love shipping rn I'm also just creating a new blog for that purpose. I'm not an amazing artist I'm just an amateur but I'll try to do something soon when I'm less busy. I'll absolutely tag it as EagleOne. Hopefully I can motivate others to do the same.

anon what the fuCK i got all emotional reading this wyd 😭

i know that the antis are coming from a place of insecurity, which is why their arguments are so disingenuous (i finally found the "the devs went out of their way to make sure that leon and ashley weren't seen as romantic" tweet and hoo boy the desperation is stinky) -- and that's also why i don't engage with them. as easy and perhaps fun as it would be to just QRT it and be like "oh it makes sense now, you're all using text to speech because you don't actually know how to read" there's no point in doing that.

i said it a while ago, but i want to say it again for good measure -- i don't want us to become them. my humble goal for eagleone fandom is to be a haven for ppl. we've been the black sheep of this fandom for so long, and aeons are still accusing us of being predators or someshit (idk i'm only semi-fluent in delusional) that i feel like we all have an obligation to stay humble now that capcom's given us a fairy tale version of RE4 where our ship is the front-and-center romance and people are finally actually being drawn to the ship. no one knows how bad this fandom can get better than eagleone folk, so it's on us to not do unto others what has been done unto us.

idk maybe that's just my whole jewish "because you were slaves in egypt..." mindset coming out but

i want us to be a place where people can just come and hang out and make friends over our shared love for resident evil. i know that i have serennedy and cleon and chreon and metaltango people all following me, and i love all of them dearly and i'm happy that we've all found each other. i feel like that's what fandom should be.

that's why i don't fight with aeons out in the open. i don't want to become them. i'll swing back if they ever come here (though i hope valuable lessons were learned the last time someone tried to come in here swinging and i took them out in exactly two responses LMAO), but i don't want to go out picking fights and i don't want any of y'all to do it either.

so it makes me feel really warm and fuzzy and happy to hear that i've inspired you in some way. i know that our little corner of the fandom over here on tumblr is small, and i know that i don't exactly have the kind of welcoming personality that will give me any sort of real platform in this fandom (at least, not like the one i had back in the day when i was a fake ass bitch LMAO), but to know that i've made at least a little difference is everything for me.

#if this ship is to be my legacy #then i would have this ship be the best version of us as RE fans that it can be

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allamericansbitch · 7 months ago

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just my food for thought: taylor's approach to promoting ttpd feels very much like big kpop releases (with the street pop-up, doing very limited promotions beforehand but dropping album versions with different names and even having photocards in her album and the album and lead single mv to drop on the same day ) and i understand that it also harks back on the generally short attention span people have with music these days, and saying that i miss her old rollouts doesn't mean she just has to bring them back because i want that, but i also would have loved a bit of a gradual build-up.

i honestly don't mind that the majority of people know who and what that album revolves around, since that is another thing i as one person can't change and i know that doesn't matter to me when i listen to the songs, but i honestly don't look forward to the fact that people will dig through the album for the most scathing lyrics, post them for viral moments, and then move on in a week or two bc then their attention will go to something else. this doesn't even feel like a real 'era' because the era is basically non-existent, which says something when taylor has marketed herself as the queen of album eras. i just wish she'd build on the theme of the album more, make it more of an era and work to make the songs just breathe for a while, you know?

while midnights wasn't my favourite album she ever did i genuinely really liked it (and same on the love for glitch!) for the way she wrote the album and the central theme of it being her contemplating her life, her actions, and her relationships - but all of that got lost in the wash like three months later and we never returned to looking at the album that way. you and the other anon were so spot on in saying that once it got the "heartbreak album" stamp (which ,,, it legit doesn't feel like a heartbreak album to me and still doesn't?), people never really came back to it or to listen to the songs and see anything else in them. i enjoy taylor's music and i like coming back to songs weeks, months, and even years later, as with any artist i listen to, and to see how i feel about them now. but it feels like that is never happening again bc the promo tells the majority of people one thing, they will listen to the album for two weeks except for two stand-out songs that become general faves, and then it's back to engaging with the commodity of the brand taylor swift, which to me feels like defeating the purpose of releasing an album aka a big body of work to stand on its own through time!

i don't know if that makes sense. in any case i love the discussions on your blog. feels like there is an entire different discussion about artists not being perfect humans, not even being likeable sometimes, and these people still releasing art that you as a listener (or watcher etc) will relate to and/or enjoy. i don't have a clear answer how to engage with that or how to look at that but the space and conversations on your blog have definitely made me keep thinking about it though it's something i have been pondering on for most of my adult life.

ah, sorry for this wall of text! i just really, really enjoy the open conversations on your blog and your general view on things. i don't know i feel on friday, but if you just want to discuss songs (if you listened, of course, if not that's also fine, i just enjoy seeing you post) i definitely love doing that even as just one of the anons on here. thank you for always putting your honesty and your love for music forward, sarah, it's why you're one of my favourite people to follow on here. 💜

i just wish the promo for this album made it feel like she was actually excited and proud of the album because right now it doesn’t. she’s not doing anything for it, and if she is, it’s being outsourced to other companies who are the actual ones doing the work (spotify with the library or the lyric messages, or instagram doing the countdown) so it really comes off as like she doesn’t care to put the effort in herself leading up to it.

And the thing about everyone moving on like a week after, you’re so right. it’s obvious a universal issue, everyone’s attention span is getting shorter everyday, but with taylor and swifties… it’s so bad. every release is forgot even days afterwards and the fans ask for another one. fans are speculating that she’s gonna drop rep tv the same day ttpd comes out… like they’ve already anticipated that they’ll move on the same day after getting it so they want more. and i feel like, while it’s impossible for taylor to fix the global attention span issue, i feel like proper promotion would help combat it within the fandom. like her releasing a first single a month or two before the album comes out would build anticipation, but also force people to slow down. here’s a teaser but now you have to wait, teach the fans patience kind of thing.

and that last part made me tear up that’s so sweet to appreciate what i have to say. i’m so happy you enjoy following me. messages like this are the exact reason why i love to have my inbox open and have these amazing, mature, open minded conversations and it sucks im gonna have to close my inbox for a short while when the album comes out but i will definitely post my opinions once i spend some time with it! ily anon thank you 💗✨

#anonymous #answered

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chirpsythismorning · 2 years ago

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one of the birthdaygate doubter anons from earlier, no.1 please please please don't ever compare me to a mlvn ever again there are few more insulting things I could be told, no.2 I feel like I maybe didn't explain myself properly so I'm gonna try again?

a. I don't care too much about background details bc while I feel they're helpful little easter eggs for analyzing things I feel the more important thing to keep in mind is how something actually affects the narrative and characters, and that goes for any theories not bdaygate so I'm just saying you don't need to list out all the one off lines and stuff I WAS actually reading the birthdaygate posts originally I PROMISE I have seen a lot of the stuff

b. so I said that I don't think birthdaygate makes sense narratively, and that's an opinion that hasn't really changed. you compare it to how they're subtle about byler, but the way they're subtle about byler is just by not stating that it's an option, but it still follows standard friends to lovers tropes, and they've still set up narratives with an inevitable byler conclusion, such as will being the one who pushes mike to say ily to el, with HIS OWN feelings as a motivator. whereas with birthdaygate the clearest pointer aside from all the background details is just that it happens to be march 22nd? it feels like they left it way too up to chance that the audience would remember it's will's birthday. I didn't even remember, and I've always been a pretty avid st fan.

what I think they would've done is state in some way not just the date, but the significance of the date, that way you are certain that detail will have significance later in this season or the next, like how will lied about the painting so we know that has to fall apart eventually. they could've had a character other than mike joyce or jonathan mention that it's will's birthday. this could've totally been a throwaway line from dustin, or they could've shown it marked on someone's calendar, but instead they rely on you to remember a detail from 2 seasons ago that wasn't even the most important part of the scene it was in? this especially feels like an odd conflict to not even slightly mention in text until s5. this feels like something where at least the START of that narrative would have to happen in s4

and then even if you do still think this qualifies as properly setting up a plot point, (which is your prerogative and your opinion to have. and obviously one I don't agree with it just feels like an unusual writing choice to me and doesn't feel like the way they normally write things) i still don't see how this actually smoothly integrates into the story while positively contributing to character and plot development? like we are nearing the end of the story, while we probably don't know the fullest reach of vecna's powers, memory stealing still feels like one that comes out of left field, and a pretty large plot point to introduce in the last season when you're supposed to be wrapping things up. it also feels clunky for character development? what do we get out of this? like do we like birthdaygate just because it sounds cool or because it would actually be narratively satisfying for the story? because I just don't see it concluding well, that feels like WAY too big of a thing for him to have just stolen the memory of will's birthday for shits and giggles and then done nothing else, and it also would make other shit with character actions and stuff weird I think. how did they not forget his bday in the time between s2 and s3? sorry I'm starting to get off track point is I literally don't see what birthdaygate actually CONTRIBUTES to the narrative. like if it happens what's the point of it though

a. Technically Easter eggs aren't intended to be caught by everyone the moment that they appear. And so, if they're only willing to give us Easter eggs to hint at birthdaygate in s4, it's probably because they want to save that official revelation for s5, meaning bringing it up more blatantly, would make those easter eggs less exciting and the surprise in s5 pretty anti-climactic. Easter eggs are literally designed so that only a few people with keen eyes notice them at first, and it often requires those very people informing the majority who are not fixated enough to look into the details themselves.

Also a little side note, I decided to look up the origins of Easter eggs in popular media. A lot of it was related to coding and gaming, but there was a section on broadcast media, where they literally mention Stranger Things using the number on the Surfer Boy Pizza van in s4 promo to leave a 'special message'... Even the literal Wiki page for Easter eggs supports birthdaygate??? Like come on now!?

Yes these easter eggs are fun when analyzing specifically in terms of theorizing right now, but their true value lies in rewatch value in the future. Easter eggs make future revelations more satisfying, because anyone can argue something came out of nowhere, however, if there are 1, 2, 3, 4+ things hinting at it, then the argument it came out of nowhere becomes slightly flawed.

Details are extremely important. I wouldn’t personally discredit them by saying they're less important, even when compared to what is said outright, especially in ST case. More often than not, what is said outright isn’t always them informing us of the facts, sometimes it’s there to intentionally trick us or to subvert. We know this because the details often contradict what they’re outright telling us. They often SHOW instead of TELL, which is an important rule for filmmakers who want their audience to think a little bit. We should be paying attention to the details, as it’s likely it’ll be necessary for us to understand what’s to come. And so, if you're picking and choosing which details to care about, you are bound to miss a thing or two...

b. Though it's not exactly encouraged right now (for obvious reasons), I can guarantee that the promotion surrounding s5 is going to make a big emphasis on the importance of rewatching the show. It's very likely we're going to be seeing the actors and Duffer's themselves voicing how necessary it is that viewers rewatch the show to prepare for what's to come.

Byler for example is something that a lot of the ga doesn't see as happening, and it's mostly because they just haven't rewatched the show recently, either not since watching s4, or even more likely they've probably only watched the entire show once through.

Does that mean that if 99% of casuals viewers assume it's not happening because the signs weren't obvious enough, that byler endgame would be bad writing? Or that it’s bad writing bc rewatching is necessary to fully understand/appreciate it? No, I don't think so! Not at all! Because there is a lot of evidence in the details. It's just that it requires the viewer to watch it more than once, and also pay closer attention, to see it for themselves and believe it.

All of us are in this tag because we rewatched the show and paid attention to the details. We could be just as clueless as the rest of the audience if we only watched the show once and moved on. But something caught our attention, which lead us to looking deeper. It wasn't just handed to us on a silver platter.

In fact byler was almost handed to us in s4, only to suddenly be ripped away in the most gut-wrenching way, leaving pretty much all bylers to seriously doubt endgame post vol. 2 (some still indefinitely). Hell, the actors and creators themselves are still trying to convince us Milkvan is endgame! BUT the details!??!! The details are what made a lot of us rethink everything and that's when we slowly started to figure out that the answers were hidden in the details, despite what was outright said to us contradicting that.

Yes, a good portion of the audience is oblivious and in the dark about almost everything beyond the most basic outright narrative in front of them. But ST wasn't intended for viewers like that, nor was it intended for viewers to watch it like that indefinitely. Right now it's unfinished, and so the Duffer’s do get a kick out of people missing things. They're even known for lying about certain things because they don't want the audience to get too close to the surprises before it's revealed.

After all, there would be no fun in everyone knowing what's to come because they stated it outright. There is an appeal to the surprise factor while we're still waiting. But when it's complete, it will all come together and make sense. So when we do finally have the ending, that's when we'll be able to watch the show the way it was intended to be watched; from beginning to end, then rewatched, again and again, as much as we please, assuming we want to see all the hints we missed in the details for ourselves.

When it comes to needing a bigger hint about the date, I think I understand your frustration. You think that if they were to explore birthdaygate at all, it would need to be brought up in the narrative in a way that everyone watching would be able to go OMG they forgot, and for it to be an in canon concept in s4, before they delve into it officially in s5.

However, I disagree.

Having someone, say Dustin or Lucas mention it, in a one off comment, would have taken away the excitement that is bound to come from them exploring that concept in early s5, potentially even s5 opener early...

I don't want to get into all the rumors and speculation, but there is quite a bit of potential evidence that they filmed scenes we haven't seen yet, because of BTS related to Noah and Will's character potentially, which circulated during s4 promotion ie. him filming at rink-o-mania in his blue plaid, the actor for lonnie being at the table read, noah and his body double in different costumes near a baseball field...

Another thing people completely overlook, is that the Duffer's themselves have admitted that s5 opens in a way that starts right off where s4 ended. They even went far as revealing they know how it starts, and they have no intention of changing it.. It's almost like parts of it might already be set in stone (filmed)?

Do I personally think Birthdaygate is going to be revealed in early s5, potentially even s5 opener early? Yes. Is that 100% likely, obviously not.

Maybe that's why it's easier for me to digest it and give it a lot more consideration? Like why bring it up blatantly in s4, if the plan was for it to open s5? It would also create a lot of hype for the final season once it is revealed, either by hinting it in s5 promo or in the first 10 minutes of the final season.

Quite frankly, a lot of fans are losing hope in the show's credibility because of the Duffer's admitting to forgetting Will's birthday. And so upon the revelation they didn't forget, that it was actually a big ploy to not spoil that revelation coming at the start of s5, would mean all the details are mostly likely intentional. And everyone coming to that realization, going back and watching, is going to lose their shit.

I don't think it's a reach to assume that all that extra time they had allowed them to be able to leave hints, put there intentionally so that when we do have the whole story, we can look back both impressed with their attention to detail, but also slightly embarrassed because we doubted them in the first place. Because the details are so fucking obvious that it's kind of insulting to buy into the lie at all.

Now onto your final point: memory stealing.

You say Vecna being capable of ‘stealing’ memories would be coming out of left field and so I urge you, and everyone honestly, to rewatch the show because…

In case you forgot or don't remember, s2 had an entire plot focused on Will and memories.

As the Mindflayer gained more control over Will, it caused him to lose his short-term memory. People like Bob, Hopper and Dr. Owens, who he didn't have strong connections (memories!!) with, he no longer recognized by name:

Although Mike encouraged Will to look at the bright side of things, that he could technically be a super spy with his ability to see/feel what the Mindflayer was feeling, even having access to his now-memories (I wonder if they could make it any more obvious how important memories are?), it also came with cons.

As the Mindflayer started to gain more control of Will, his short-term memories started slipping. Those parts of him were being taken over and hijacked. The only thing that allowed Will to keep fighting on, despite him barely holding on by the end of s2, was those important memories he shared with Joyce, Jonathan and Mike.

And so how does birthdaygate fit into that?

Well, this is where it gets kind of epic.

At the end of 4x07, we see El manage to defeat Peter (Henry). Though this wasn't present day, this was back in 1979, before Vecna ever had a plan for Will.

His original plan at that time, was to presumably get El to join him. He took someone who was feeling weak and made them an offer he thought they couldn't refuse. Because I mean, El's life was pretty shit at that time, like god awful. And so she was the perfect contender in his eyes. And not only that but she was presumably powerful.

And what did El do exactly to succeed in defeating him?

Well, she recalled the day she was born (her birthday).

The love from her mother she experienced in that moment, and the power she gained from that love, was much stronger than any power Henry had from all of his bitterness and hate he felt.

And so, is it possible Henry learned something that day? That maybe, if he were to try this again, but to instead get Will to join him, that he might need to rethink his approach?

How can he prevent Will from having the power to fight on?

How can he prevent Will from using his happiest moments to save the day again?

By taking them away all together? By erasing them? Stealing them? Whatever you want to call it, I think how exactly that will play out remains to be seen.

I don't have all the answers. I'm not the Duffers and I don't claim to have all the answers about how this will play out.

I don't think that takes away from the evidence though and the implications of what this kind of event would cause Will to feel, and us the audience to feel watching it play out.

Seeing Will suffer as much as he has, and this now topping it off? Vecna now using it all against him to join him? We're going to be feeling for him tremendously. Whether he joins him or not (by choice or not by choice), is going to be fucking incredible to see play out.

#stranger things #will byers #birthdaygate #stranger things 5 #byler #st5 headcanon #also sorry for comparing you to a milkvan anon that was uncalled for no one deserves that

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bcofl0ve · 2 years ago

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i still don't get it, did austin cheat or not olivia?

i'm new to the fandom, and im also dumb

i realized earlier that while i have made a couple ‘auslivia documentation’ posts (which are linked in my pinned post!) i never did one about the deuxmoi debacle after lily rose so. that will be this.

disclaimer: we know know quite nearly nothing at all about the actual timeline of auslivia’s involvement/exactly how involved they were etc. so this explainer is like .5% documentation and 99.5% my own theories based on what i have been told/do know. take it or leave it 🤸🏼‍♀️ also if you don’t like speculation and gossip about real people please just scroll along. there are over 900 of you- and some people do like this content of mine. different strokes for different folks!

that ^ was the anon that was posted like right after the lily rose photos dropped in august 2021. olivia followed deuxmoi at the time but then unfollowed after. (i believe after this was posted- not before, but someone correct me if i’m wrong i know i have a few followers who were actually in the fandom for this!). the deuxmoi reddit thread about it all at the time can be found here.

personally. personally. even i- resident auslivia nut case, do not think they were actively boyfriend and girlfriend at any point past like, maybe april-ish a month after elvis wrapped before the reality of post elvis life really set in. but even if they were officially donezo they were still on happy as could be after the fact until lily (the post ppl blew up olivia’s comments about it on was a post from the month before, july 2021, that austin had apparently liked. and we all know how rarely that boy likes anything on the gram LOL).

my personal theory moreso related to her liking that comment about how she could do better is that even if they were no longer bf/gf bc of distance timing etc they kept ✨talking✨ to the extent that olivia perhaps thought that for door was still open when he was done in london/he still ~wanted her~ etc. until lily rose slammed that door shut and left liv feeling hurt even if it wasn’t cheating cheating.

but mollie- the anon says girlfriend! it says cheating??!? yes, it does- but my wager there is that the person who sent it knew that ‘she was his girlfriend and he cheated’ would make him look worse than ‘he still flirted with her over text and she’s hurt’- so they said fuck it and twisted the truth a bit. a few weeks ago when we were talking about how shitty of a friend someone would’ve had to be to humiliate olivia like this the theory was floated that olivia sent this to deuxmoi from a side account or something herself. and honestly? i can 100% buy that. i believe in women’s wrongs™️ and love that girl to death don’t get me wrong- but i think that type of lash out would definitely fall in line with olivia’s personality? if that makes sense?

the end! 📸

#gossip time with mollie #austin butler #olivia dejonge #lily rose depp #deuxmoi

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levbolton · 2 years ago

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It is I, anon from earlier today and I can now in confidence tell you that your fics have broken me down into nothingness.

Not only am I stupid and cannot read tags but I repeatedly let myself be comforted by your writing only to be hit with the sad truth at the end. You can’t keep getting away with this /j .Your style is so unique and I can feel the passion you have for the characters as you can see their inner turmoils on the writings. I love how you bring them to life

My personal favourite is Monologue (which is highly underrated btw). I love the dynamic between Fumi and Maki plus Fumi talking about her day made me smile so much. Then cane the gut wrenching feeling about Maki. Honestly you managed to balance the fluff with the angst out so well and I really adored it.

To conclude this annoying fan’s rambling, you are my favourite blue period writer and such a great storyteller. I know how you’ve stated that the fandom is quite inactive (cause it is) but your presence manages to be so outstanding to me. I don’t know why I was too nervous to follow now but I might as well write my letter of appreciation so it can be covered by the bots.

I hope you are able to continue doing what you love and have a great rest of day. 🙃

thanks op, kinda figured bcs i have emails from ao3 and your usernames match

personally 'monologue' is quite the lackluster for me, i wanted to use the concept, i think i wanted to make it about ytyt with yotasuke that would tell yatora about the summer festival only to reveal at the end that yatora was unconscious the whole time so yotasuke wasn't talking with anyone, i got the idea while working on 'a psychological take' (where i wrote already a summer festival so it felt unnecessary to do it again) and at the same time i wanted to write fumimaki (bcs there's literally nothing for this married couple, almost canon i'd say, more canon than ytyt), so i combined both, i was still in a phase where i wanted to kill all characters and make them suffer which i think i did a lot and now i just want to write them relax and be happy (writing depression is hard), so it's not really that original inside my head, but im glad at least someone else likes it (for me billy of tea was way more fun to think about)

tbh i've been thinking about moving on from blp for quite a few months already but i simply can't find something else to interest me the same way ytyt does, which sucks bcs if i don't write then no one will write stuff, rn i want to finish this fic i'm sorking on (i hope i get to 100k), then a oneshot about ytyt soulmates and another oneshot about miki and ayano only, then idk, i think it would be good to retire (not to be petty actually, but i did write 40% of the words in the yatoyota tag on ao3)

fandom isn't really only inactive, it is now a bit (i continuously try to collect blp fans here and on twt, the more the merrier), but i just felt ignored since the anime was airing, again maybe it was the bad timing bcs i started posting my first fic towards the end of the anime when people lost the interest bcs that adaptation is horrible, then in february yamaguchi had covid and from march to july it was complete hiatus and then the whole dj drama (which i'd lie if i said the mob mentality to drop it didn't affect me too although i was the one to uncover the doujinshis on my own weeks before it got to twitter, anyway my idea was: this isn't a piece of media i care about and i am already deeply in love with blue period so whatever, my respect for yamaguchi decreased and i got a passive aggressive attitude towards her until she posted the new year ytyt picture with bunnies this january, now i seriously don't care abt whatever else she drew - also damn i'm really side railing with this)

thanks again for your support, sorry for the long unnecessary text lmao, i have too much free time

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tau1tvec · 1 year ago

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In response to anonymous below. It seems to me that the problem for many in this situation is not at all that their photos from the game are worse than others. Here everything is much more global. I'm not saying anything, but probably the point is that people do not have enough attention and approval in real life. There are not enough people who could share their interests. Many in this way try to raise their self-esteem. After all, if they are praised, it means they receive recognition, it means they are good or talented. But the problem is that the simbler community is not really where you should look for a way to raise your self-esteem. My advice to anonymous. Don't try for someone else, play for yourself. Enjoy it. The more you try to keep up with those who do what you think is better, the less motivation you will have to go further. And this applies to everything in life. Not just posts on tumblr. When I first came to Tumblr, I didn’t post anything for a year. I just followed people and liked them. But then, when I started sharing photos, at some point I caught myself thinking that when I start building or creating a Sim, I first of all think about how it will be appreciated on Tumblr. Will others like it? And I stopped enjoying my game. Because it has become a pursuit of the perfect picture. And still it did not turn out perfect, because others were better. I stopped playing and uploading photos. But then I realized that I miss my game. And I began to just play, sometimes share moments from my game and not wait for the approval of others in the form of likes. I am always glad to likes and comments, and this is very important. But I try not to take it as motivation. Even if my photo gets 1 or 2 likes, I'll just move on. It just doesn't matter. Although you may not think so now. Sorry for such a big text and my bad english.

No need to apologize, and I know you're just responding to anon, but I'd also like to respond to this as well, bc I agree with some points, but am wrestling with some.

Firstly there is nothing wrong with turning to online spaces for peer validation. I know it isn't the case everywhere in the world, but this isn't the late 90's, the majority of ppl on this site fall in an age group that was basically raised online, all the time, an online that was so normalized, it's even how you kept up with your irl friends, classmates, coworkers, and family, and a lot of ppl still do this.

There is no difference to me between an elderly man posting a new birdhouse he built on Facebook with other bird enthusiasts, and a teenager showing off their sims blorbos in their cute new cc outfits on Tumblr with other teenagers. Both these people are looking for peer validation, and sometimes yes that can help one's self-esteem, and there's nothing at all wrong with that. For teens, this is actually a part of their adolescent development, if you've got a teen of you're own you know what I'm talking about, and have had a conversation with their pediatrician about "screen time", which is why they encourage both parents and teens to work together to make sure it's managed in a healthy way, so you are absolutely right on that one. Simblr shouldn't be a person's only outlet to build self-esteem, and this isn't an issue that only harms younger ppl, even adults are constantly being encouraged to continue keeping and building irl connections. The ramifications of social media harms us all.

This is human nature, we are meant to want to connect with, love, and bring joy to others, we want to fit in, bc it's how our ancestors quite literally survived. This is how shame worked to govern societies prior to modern day law and order. The problem is a lot of how modern society has been for years is that it's focused on an individualist mentality, despite the fact that our bodies and minds are built for a community mentality.

Okay, now that I got that out I appreciate your concern, and your suggestions, I've used this method myself a few times, and it's certainly helped me rekindle my love for just playing games in general, and letting the creation of content for it be second, I've also picked up other outlets to escape and be creative, some new, some old, and many that don't involve a screen, or a screen name.

I'm a lot better for it, but I understand that this isn't easy or attainable ( whether physically or financially ) for others, so I really wish others would try and remember than when you see ppl like last anon cross your dash.

#feeling like there should be some kind of simblr help discord server or something #bc tumblr inbox is kinda awkward for these kinds of deep conversations #asks #anon #long post

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romanarose · 6 months ago

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Hello there ✨️ love your work 💕 I'm a long time fan 🫶🏼. I've been on tumblr a few years now, but I'd never found the courage to post anything of my own til now. I've been feeling a little optimistic these days, and genuinely excited about posting some of my writing and sharing it with the people out here. Do you have any advice on how to start posting and interacting from scratch? Cause I'm low-key nervous abt it and it seems like my target audience has already formed a solid community I don't know how to get into 🥺

Wow, this might be the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me wowie!!!!!!

okay let me tell my advice

The numbers don't equal quality. Certain things appeal to people more, like shorter stories, straight up smut, Joel Miller gets way more than when I write Marc. I think one of my best works was my Marc X Jewish!Reader series, Seattle, but it idnt get anywhere really even at the height of moon knight popularity bc people dont read OC's esp ethnic oc's. Put your heart into it and those who enjoy it will enjoy it. I had a William Miller series that averaged like 8-20 notes per chapter but I had a handful of readers I knew adored it and thats what mattered

This site is so much better with interaction. PLEASE DON"T ONLY INTERACT FOR THE SAKE OF GETTING FRIENDS WHO"LL REBLOG!! However, if you dont already, make sure you are reblogging stories and leaving nice words! Me personally, if someone reblogs regularly and leave nice words, espcially things that show they really paid attention, I usually just follow back bc I love friends. Im happy to get to know you!

Yes, it's hard sometimes to break it. It took a few months for me to get into the Oscar Issac writer circles, and then when I started writing Pedro it took a while too but I always reblogged and tried to communicate and I made friends. Isn't it crazy we can just.... become friends with our fav writers? Obvs Im not friends with all my favs but MOST of my favs became my friends <3

It's kinda annoying to me bc Im bad at it but aesthetics help. Title, a picture to catch eyes, summary, warnings, note. Try to make it look nice. Im really had at this LMFAOOOOOO. My lovely friends have made my best looking banners. If you have graphic design skills, use them! i wish i didn't have to but it does help catch readers when you have an interesting headers and everything looks pretty.

Few technicals. Use the readmore option. No one wants to reblog a LOOOOOONG story and clog up the feeds. Use as many correct tags as you can. Tag any triggering content. And I'm the worst at this but proof read. Im bad at proof reading, everyone who reads my work knows spelling, grammar, wrong words are a common issue I have bc Im bad at typing. When I still had word on my laptop I started typing in word and using text to speach to help me catch stuff!

Keep at it! IDK where you know my work, weather moon knight, triple frontier or tlou or whatever but all those fandoms right now are like.... a little less active. So don't be dissapointed if it takes a while. With TLOU, theres SOOOOOOO many amazing writers. With Moon Knight theres just less buzz rn. If you write for lesser known characters like Llewyn Davis or Will Miller, you probs won't reach the notes of established writers in Joel Miller. Just the reality. the point is keep going, find what you like and what gets people excited and go from there

This is the most important. Write what you want. I mean it. I love writing Will Miller because he's my special man <3 even though it's a small fanbase. My series Rooms On Fire, a lot have lost interest bc its a long series. That's okay! I love the series and it makes me happy to write it. I wrote a few Miguel O'Hara stories because, I'm being honest here, I wanted to capitalize on the hype. Guess what? They weren't good. I'm not proud of them. Since then, I write what Im inspired to.

THIS SHOULD BE FUN AND IF AT ANY POINT, IT"S NOT FUN STOP AND FIGURE OUT WHY

feel free to say hi off anon! I'm always happy to get to know new people. If you like Triple Frontier, I have a discord server that is pretty much open to everyone! I'm trying to revive it and you can share your works and meet knew people!

Anon or not, let me know if you have any questions!

#writing advice #fanfiction advice #fanfiction writing

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deathnoting · 3 years ago

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a misa and b fic!!! so I haven’t been in the dn fandom for a loooong time but I still follow you on tumblr! I was wondering if you would ever write for misa and L tho, or if you even like that ship? when I was big into the series a few years back, they were my guilty pleasure ship lol.. don’t know if it’s the same now but it was a little bit hard to find good content for them back then. I just love the messed up dynamic of serial killer girlboss and weirdo detective that would probably treat her (questionably!) better than Light. :p

hi anon, sorry for taking so long to answer you!!

it's funny bc misa/L has never had a very strong appeal for me despite the fact that conceptually it's very solid. i have written some misa/L scenes into my long fics but it always exists more in the context of l/light/misa and l/light/misa/b.

L & misa on their own, idk??? i love and support you, anon, but i'm just not into it as a romantic ship, i guess. i think i just cannot get past the mental hurdle of misa being attracted to L. i don't think she ever would be.

that said, as a pair that are somehow implicated in each other's personal lives in very intimate ways because of their connections to other people, leading them to have to put up with each other & learn to get along despite both being huge bitches????? i love that for them

anyway thanks for still following <3

#that last paragraph is just me describing their relationship in my ongoing death note non-fic #i say non fic bc i've fucking hacked away at the canon for so many years that my dn fic no longer resembles the dn canon at all tbh #just out here writing an original novel about queer found families formed by former serial killers who run an orphanage in england #anyway. said fic is largely about the lxlightxmisaxb polycule in which l & misa are the only two that never have had sex w each other #so that shows where i'm at on the issue i guess #i don't know how still follow me anon bc all i post is text posts about my off brand death note universe but i love u #anon #asks

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ectonurites · 3 years ago

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i’m SO interested in timkon from kon’s perspective!!! i haven’t read almost anything from dc so 90% of what i know is from meta on tumblr and all the context i have is literally everyone going “walking bi flag superboy and twink robin are in love, trust me on this” but then all the “proof” of (non-52) kon being into dudes (aside from *gestures at him*) is about bart?? so i’m like ok maybe this is an unrequited thing, but then everyone is going “kon is crying screaming throwing up bc tim has a boyfriend and it’s not him!!!” and i’m like ok i’m gonna believe you guys, i’m invested at this point, but y’all tricked me with the coffee thing so i’m keeping an eye open for selenur

LMAO. Okay so I do wanna say that like, the way I view things with them probably isn't necessarily the way everyone in the fandom does, especially because.... tumblr DC fandom in particular is not renowned for reading the comics and looking at things in context, versus I read a lot of comics and somehow retain a lot of the information (as is evident if you follow me/see my posts go around). Also as a whole, I feel like a lot of fan content with Timkon comes from a Tim-centric POV rather than having as much deep digging into Kon's thoughts + content (understandable in some ways because his solo? very uncomfortable a lot of the time!).

Before digging into things, disclaimer: I'll be talking a bit about Kon's dating history, and Kon at age 16 dated Tana, a 23 year old woman (he also dated another adult woman, Knockout, but that doesn't really come up as much here). It's fucked up, it's not a good thing, I hate that it's something that happened. But when talking about Kon's relationships it's not something I can like... ignore or gloss over, ya know? Because it was a big thing for him for a while and is part of his story. I just want it clear that like... while i'll be talking about it seriously as one of his relationships, it's something I actively dislike. But it's not something the narrative has him treat as bad, so when talking about Kon's perspective it might not come across as negatively as I personally view it, if that makes sense?

Anyways, the way I see things, Kon potentially developing feelings for Tim doesn't really happen until after Kon comes back to life (and even so not in a way I think he'd be at all that aware of), which places it pretty shortly before the end of the pre-reboot world. I think there are like, things that built into it earlier, which I will go into, but as a whole a lot of this is in far more subtle ways than the more obvious moments we can point to for Tim having feelings for Kon.

This post is incredibly long and probably kinda disjointed, just a fair warning 🤷‍♂️

Quick note that I don't usually like the "proof" phrasing that you brought up in the ask, anon, when discussing these sorts of things. I prefer to approach posts I make like this from an angle of supporting/explaining a reading/interpretation of the text, rather than necessarily "proving" something. What I've laid out here is a lot of how I interpret things, based on looking at Kon's history and the connections that I've noticed across it, rather than saying anything all that definitively.

To start I want to discuss some of Kon's dating history. Kon has two long-standing love interests (Tana and Cassie) and then a lot of smaller shorter-lived ones, some of these shorter ones are still rather impactful (for better or worse) and I've done a more in-depth list of his love interests that goes into all of them before here, but the two longer ones are gonna be more brought up/relevant to this post. One thing that his relationships with Tana and Cassie have in common versus his shorter more fling-like romances is him considering the girl a best friend/close friend first. Obviously this doesn't mean 'ah yes he falls in love with everyone he considers a best friend' but it's a present component of the relationships that are most impactful for him.

Tana is someone he meets basically right out of the cloning tube- they meet in Adventures of Superman #501 which is the first issue focusing on him. There's immediate aesthetic attraction obviously, but over the course of the craziness that is Reign of the Supermen they become and remain best friends, not moving into dating territory until his solo comic afterwards. He's on Young Justice with Cassie for a while where she has very clear feelings for him from before the moment she met him- but he doesn't start to actively show feelings for her until after a very specific moment- when Tana is murdered in front of him and Cassie during Sins of Youth (Superboy #74). After Tana's death, Kon begins getting overprotective of Cassie in ways that actively annoyed her (in Young Justice #29 she complains about it) and at the end of the comic he confesses feelings (in Young Justice #55).

I think 'it's a significant traumatic event that sparked him feeling more for her than he had before' is the main takeaway I want to highlight here. Because then, as we enter the Teen Titans run, Conner is hit with this big traumatic revelation about himself... with his best friend Tim right there with him (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #1).

Quick recap of some Tim & Kon stuff before this point, because their friendship had been a kinda complicated thing. Their first meeting had them pitted against one another because of Poison Ivy before eventually managing to work together, and the two started getting on each other's nerves pretty quickly once Young Justice starts rolling. It's very clear Kon thinks Tim has a stick up his ass, and Tim thinks Kon doesn't know how to take anything seriously. It's also clear imo that Kon from pretty early on wants Tim to think highly of him/respect him (like how when Batman told him that Robin thinks highly of him, Kon immediately parrots it back to the alternate universe Bruce as one of his first ways to self-identify in Superboy #60) and does think pretty highly of Tim too (thinking about Young Justice #3 at the halloween party the way Kon & Bart are so quick to defend Tim) even if he's hard-pressed to admit it.

The primary thing that holds Tim & Kon back from being closer in this whole era is the lack of trust because Tim won't share much about himself. This blows up between them on Apokolips with their big fight, and Kon's talk with Linda afterwards (in Young Justice #38) makes it clear how much he really does care about Tim & their friendship despite the tension they had.

Linda: You said it fine. So... what are you doin' up here? Conner: Thinkin'. Linda: About what? Conner: I dunno. Stuff. Linda: Boy, it's like pulling teeth with you sometimes, y'know that? Conner: I was just thinkin' about what went down on Apokolips during the war. Robin and I, well... We had words. Linda: I take it they weren't all nice ones. Conner: I said I don't trust him. Linda: Ouch. Conner: And ignored his orders. Linda: Double ouch. Conner: And implied he might be collecting files on us like Batman with the J.L.A. Linda: Mortal wound there, kid. Conner: Screwed up big time, didn't I? Linda: That's the problem with wartime, kid. For every person who covers himself with glory, there're a hundred guys who cover themselves-- and others-- with dirt. Conner: Or wounds. Like that one on your belly looks really nasty, you know? Linda: As okay as someone who nearly got herself disemboweled can be. Conner: Guess, in a way, me and Robin and the others were lucky, huh? Linda: In a way, yeah. On the other hand, some of the deepest wounds are the ones you can't see. Conner: *Sigh* You got that right. (Young Justice (1998) #38)

Once World Without Young Justice happens and Tim's name is out in the open, the big tension between them is gone and that really marks where I think they more mutually start seeing each other as best friends (but worth noting- Kon had called Tim his "ex-best friend" in Superboy #92 right after their fight on Apokolips- so as far as I can tell from what I've read, he thought of Tim as his best friend first- even in that era with their lack of trust)

Anyways, yes. So they are established best friends when we get to things like Graduation Day (where Kon drops his defensiveness as soon as he realizes how not okay Tim is during their scene in the closet together in #2)/the dissolving of Young Justice after Donna's death, and then the start of the Teen Titans run where they find out about the Lex thing together.

Now, to relate this back to the stuff with Cassie- finding out 'surprise! Lex Luthor is one of your clone parents' is a very different type of trauma than witnessing a death of a loved one, but Kon's reactions in these situations I think correlate, just matching what the trauma was. After witnessing Tana die in front of him and Cassie, he becomes overprotective of Cassie because he doesn't want something like that to happen to her too. After finding out this new traumatic thing about himself with Tim, he becomes pretty emotionally dependent on Tim because he's the only other person that knows/understands what's going on. It's Kon latching onto the other person who was present in a way that makes him feel better about what happened, and growing much closer to them in the process.

Kon's emotional dependency on Tim in this era I think is exemplified by the way he reacted to Tim quitting Robin & Steph stepping into the role- he's a jerk about it to Steph, and gets very upset about it around Tim.

Conner: So you approve of this new Robin? You want her to be in the Titans? Tim: I don't have anything to do with it. But she's a strong young woman. She really is. Conner: It's your ex-girlfriend, isn't it? Spoiler or whatever she used to call herself. Tim: Let it go. Conner: You're my best friend, Tim. How can I? The Titans aren't the Titans without Robin. They just aren't. Tim: Just because I'm not wearing a cape doesn't mean we can't hang. Conner: It won't be the same. I've heard that from too many friends I never talk to anymore. Jack: Tim, opening credits are rolling. Tim: Dad! Dad, this is-- Jack: What? Tim: ...Nothing. I'll be down in a minute. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #14)

One little detail here that I know is just Johns not being aware of how things were actually going in the Robin book (something clear from this entire arc) but that always sticks out to me is Kon just jumping to assume Steph is Tim's ex when they hadn't actually had a proper breakup- absolutely not one that Tim could have told Kon about considering Tim & Steph were in fine standing before he quit Robin and he apparently hadn't communicated with Kon since that happened. Kon just really is placing his frustration on her, in a way that... I dunno. I think he'd be upset like this at anyone else aside from Tim being in the Robin costume, but the way he highlights who she is feels oddly targeted. Because he knows this new Robin has a personal connection to Tim too, it's like him going "You're my best friend and you're abandoning me, but because this girl is/was your girlfriend you're just gonna let it happen."

Obviously though, this situation gets resolved and Tim comes back into the Robin role, and their friendship picks back up (with Kon confidently saying "I knew it," when Tim calls to tell him he'd be coming back in Teen Titans #15). But they're still keeping this secret, and it's still this heavy thing weighing on Kon. Kon tries to be there for Tim when he's got bad things going on (Jack's death) but Tim has a much harder time letting himself depend on Kon. Also all the Titans Tomorrow shit happens, and everyone's gotta grapple with that possible future. Eventually we get to the "Do you think I have a soul?" conversation, where everyone on the team's bravery about coming forward with their secrets inspires Kon to finally do the same- before it all goes wrong. Lex takes over, Kon attacks the team, and is then plagued with guilt because he hurt the people he cares about.

And while he mentions everyone in his monologue bit after he'd quit the team and was hiding out in Smallville, we only see recaps of two, Tim and Cassie, as he talks about them: "I broke Tim... and I... I hurt Cassie... I hurt her." (in Teen Titans Vol. 3 #26). Plus during his whole mind/soul journey with Raven in the same issue, he again specifically highlights the two of them.

Being in any way responsible for harm coming to Cassie has been basically one of his biggest fears ever since what happened to Tana. And Tim is the person he's been relying on emotionally the most in recent times because of knowing about stuff with Luthor. So these two together are just this huge focus for him in terms of the guilt, they're grouped together in his mind, at this point they're his most important people. (and even after he dies and comes back, when he talks about this with Cassie later in Adventure Comics (2009) #2... he once again specifically brings up Tim and her separately while grouping everyone else together)

Now, shortly after this is when Infinite Crisis gets rolling, Superboy-Prime first attacks, all sorts of shit happens, Kon and Cassie fuck consummate their relationship in the barn before the final battle gets going- and then Kon dies in her arms after saving everyone. Tim gets there too late to say goodbye, we know the drill. Thus sparking the One Year Later era where we learn about Tim and Cassie both spectacularly failing to cope in even remotely healthy ways, etc etc. These are the things that you dig into for how Tim feels about Kon.

For the point of this post though, discussing how Kon feels about Tim, we've gotta fast forward to once he's back. Worth noting such things as 'all of the year after Infinite Crisis, the OYL era, most of Final Crisis, and everything in between' happens in that time he's gone, which causes a lot of change in both Cassie and Tim.

When Conner comes back, it's not like... everything just fits back into place exactly the same as it was before, for him it feels like he's been gone days but for them it's been well over a year (and a crazy eventful one at that). Cassie has become leader of the Titans, she's got responsibilities and is definitely a bit more hardened by the things she's lost, and getting people back doesn't just undo all the grief. Tim has gone off the deep end in ways because of just how many losses he experienced in such close succession (and while some people come back, they don't all for him), and is throwing himself into his search for Bruce. Meaning that neither of the two incredibly-important-to-Kon dynamics are what they used to be, and that forces him to approach things in a new way.

Alongside that he’s also back in full force dealing with the Lex/Clark angst. We find out about the lists he keeps comparing traits of each clone parent, and Cassie immediately catches onto the way he's trying hard to push himself into following Clark's path of life in Adventure Comics (2009) #2. Cassie tells Kon about the kiss that happened between her and Tim (while very specifically saying the reasoning behind it happening was her and Tim both missing him), and they reconcile their relationship but it's clear… things there are different now, because everyone and everything's changed, but that doesn't mean they should waste any of the time they have together.

And then the following issue is his first moment reconnecting with Tim. Where he sees how closed off and distant Tim’s being, how much he’s letting guilt destroy him, how much things aren’t the same between the two of them anymore… and Kon even says it’s freaking him out the way Tim’s acting. Eventually we get to the big moment, where Tim admits he tried to clone Conner.

Tim: My girlfriend died. My dad died. My best friend died. And I couldn't accept it. I couldn't lose you too. Conner: So what? Tim: I tried to clone you. Conner: Tim- Tim: But I failed. Like I failed everyone else. Conner: Tim, even if it'd worked, it wouldn't have been me. Tim: That's what Cassie said. And I know that. I know it wouldn't have been you, Conner, but... but it would've been something. Conner: Man, between everything you've gone through, Cassie's gone through, and Bart's gone through, I picked a really suck-ass year to be gone, didn't I? Tim: The worst. I am so screwed up right now. (Adventure Comics (2009) #3)

Even though I don’t think Tim was consciously aware of it, this moment was... Tim admitting the extent of his feelings for Conner in a subtle specific way that Conner would have been able to pick up on. I’ve gone into this in more detail here- but back when Tana had died in front of Conner and Cassie, Kon's immediate reaction was "No! There must be a way to save her... Bring her back... Clone her!" (in Superboy #74). To do the exact same thing Tim tried to do.

Back in Superboy #92, the instance where it really feels like Kon has feelings for Bart he just doesn't know how to grapple with, he phrases things like "Or some Freudian thing where I secretly think of Impulse as a chick-" in his head, and I feel like here in this instance he'd be having the reverse sort of thought- "Is this some thing where Tim secretly thinks of me like I thought of Tana?"

This is kinda the point where I start to see a... shift, in how Kon thinks about Tim- or rather it's that Kon is thinking more about what Tim thinks of him. (I'll get back to that idea later- but I want to cover some events of things that happen in chronological order.)

But even though Tim's not in a good place here clearly, once things are more out in the open Kon can see that even though they each are different and things maybe aren't the same anymore, much like how he and Cassie could reconcile- he and Tim can figure their stuff out too.

Presumably in-universe next the rest of Boy of Steel happens and Tim shows up again there with the whole core four reunited at the end as Kon throws his journal in the fire. Then we get into Blackest Night- where Kon has to face his own mortality in a complex way and Cassie's the one there to help him, strengthening their bond.

Over in Red Robin in the Collision arc Tim and Kon have their reuniting moment on much better terms once Tim has found proof about Bruce and everything- and we get the very well known hug scene, where Conner affirms to Tim that all he ever needs to do is yell for him and he'll be listening. A short while later now that Tim's not fully isolating himself he actually calls upon his friends to help with the Ra's stuff. Things are looking good with them again- but even so Tim's still not around full time.

In the Teen Titans book, around this time Conner and Bart officially rejoin the team, and there starts to be some tension between Conner and Cassie in a new way- where her feelings for Conner start seeming to get in the way of her being able to lead the team and make tough calls on the field, because she's too preoccupied worrying about him. Over in Conner's solo content he's also further trying to adjust to being back in Smallville, and doing some more reflection on his life and who he is- the stuff I was talking about over in parts of this post about these concepts of 'normality' and what that means for him. By the end he reaches a point of acceptance that he doesn't need to be 'normal', but while things are ongoing he's trying to figure out just... what it is he's really doing in Smallville, what life he wants to live.

And so this combination of things leads to Conner breaking up with Cassie

Conner: I meant what I said earlier. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be a Titan and I'll always be here for you. But-- I think it would be best for both of us if we stopped seeing each other. Cassie: What? Conner: You want to focus on leading this team and me... Well I want to try having a life that isn't only about being Superboy, Isn't only about Wonder Girl. I want to have a life as Conner too. Something simpler. Normal. I need that right now. Cassie? I figure this was coming anyway. Thought I'd make it easier for both of us. Right? Cassie: Sure. Yeah. Conner: I still love you, Cassie. Cassie: I love you. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #91)

So now Conner is in this place where he is single for the first time in a long time, and he's starting to do a lot of thinking and reflection on his life so far- figuring out who he is outside of just a superhero. The very next issue of Teen Titans is the crossover with Red Robin, and Conner is pushing hard the whole time on how happy he is to have Tim back around (and ultimately Tim does rejoin the team). This is also where we get this well known scene between the two of them:

Damian: Here's another one for you, clone boy. Conner: Seriously-- how do you put up with that little snot? Tim: I don't. I try to limit my contact with Robin as much as possible these days. Conner: Wish I could do the same. Still refuse to call him by your name. I don't care what costume you or him wears. As far as I'm concerned, you're my Robin, always will be. Tim: And you'll always be my clone boy. Conner: On second thought, maybe we should trade both of you in for Batgirl. I hear she's good. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #92)

Where Conner is acting similarly in a way to how he did back when Stephanie was the one in the Robin costume- refusing to really even acknowledge anyone else in the role because to him that should be Tim. One thing I do also notice here is that... Conner says this sweet thing to Tim, which probably comes off a little more intense than he was intending it to (the 'my Robin' phrasing), but when Tim throws something similar back at him in a teasing tone (by taking Damian's insult and making it a term of endearment) Kon immediately redirects the subject with a joke... which makes me think back to Superboy #92 where Kon writes everything off he's maybe feeling about Bart as a joke. Kinda like he went "Woah- that interaction was very tender there for a second, and I don't know how to deal with that besides making a joke," ya know?

Especially if we consider the earlier notion I presented of 'he's thinking a lot more about what Tim thinks of him' and that being something he's just not sure how to approach or think too deeply about (like to question why he's now grown this concerned with Tim's opinion on him), so him switching gears quickly to keep avoiding it... checks out! Conner's not in a place to approach any of that sort of thing yet, he's still figuring out his basic place in the world.

Which brings us to one of my favorite more overlooked moments of Tim & Kon together, from Superboy Vol. 5 #6, where they talk on the Titans Tower rooftop at 5am about their places in the world, Conner being unsure if Smallville's really the right place for him- or rather how much longer Smallville will be the right fit. It's also showing Tim and Conner having their... their trust and dynamic back, now, even after everything that's happened.

The following issue though is the reason I keep harping on this concept of "Conner is thinking a lot about what Tim thinks of him," because Superboy Vol. 5 #7 is where Conner gets affected by a Red Mercy, an alien plant that causes the person it latches onto to experience their worst nightmares come true (the exact opposite of the Black Mercy- a plant that causes the person affected to experience their dreams come true, from the famous Superman story 'For The Man Who Has Everything'). Within this nightmare world, Kon discovers he had betrayed everyone and was embracing his Luthor side, he had done something to (presumably killed) Cassie, had killed Bruce and many others... and Tim is leading a resistance against him, with a mission to kill him. When the nightmare progresses, another thing happens right in front of Kon: Tim is shot and killed.

Which means that among the fears we already knew about, like being turned into Luthor's monster... some of Kon's other worst nightmares/greatest fears are the concept of Tim hating him and the thought of seeing Tim die. These are things they specifically devoted page space to, out of all the possible fallout that could have come from Conner switching sides (even Cassie who has been consistently shown as one of the most important people to him doesn't show up here, we're just told he did something to her).

Conner: Tim? Why are you dressed like that? What's going on? Please... just stop for a minute so we can figure this all out. Tim: You had your chance to talk. You had your chance to stop this. And every time, you deceived us... betrayed us. You destroyed everyone we care about... you destroyed this entire town. No more talking... Elongated Lass, hold him. Hawklad, Negative Boy... kill him. Conner: This is insane! Something's wrong Tim... This can't be real! I don't remember Anything! Tim: Take him down! Hawklad: What's the matter, Kent, suddenly growing a conscience? Or are you just mad that you're finally the one being hunted?! Conner: [I need to find Psionic Lad. I was with him... maybe he can help... If he's even still alive.]

Conner: I... I don't want to hurt you guys. Just stop so we can figure this out! Tim: Don't listen to him! Everything he says is a lie! I bet you think you're just going to tear through us like you did the others, don't you? Conner: Tim, I don't-- Tim: Well I've got a surprise for you, Conner... A unique cocktail of the Bane Venom and Hourman's Miraclo formula is coursing through me. Bruce managed to synthesize it before he died. Before you killed him! Conner: Tim... Don't... Tim: "Don't"? "Don't"?! After everything you've done? After what you did to Cassie? Conner: C-Cassie?

Conner: Tim! Tim: Arrgh! Conner: No! Simon: Don't worry, Conner... I'm on it. Conner: Simon?! Negative Boy: I'm gonna kill you Valentine!!! Simon: Whatever, freak. (Superboy Vol. 5 #7)

I think it was worth noting that Kon's scream of Tim name as he was killed was... literally put in a different color for emphasis. This was also the case with the other person we see killed during this whole nightmare dream thing a little later: Lori, Kon's kinda cousin on the Luthor side. Aside from those two the other person who nearly gets hurt/killed is Ma while Luthor tries to manipulate Kon into doing it. So the bonds that we see as most important to him here, the ones he's at this point most afraid of losing/fucking up... are his family, and Tim.

So... yeah, Tim and Tim's opinion of Kon is very clearly prominent in his mind at this point if an evil space plant so strongly latched onto that as a piece of all this! Whether that's something Conner's choosing to acknowledge/analyze or not, it's there. To me the place it makes sense for that to have started being something on Kon's mind is back where I first brought this idea up- Adventure Comics #3 when Kon may have been comparing Tim's reaction to his death with Kon's own reaction to Tana's. I can just see that as... sparking a train of thought that just kinda keeps going even if he's trying to ignore it. And once Conner and Cassie cut things off, while she's still obviously important to him, she apparently doesn't reach the level of importance in his subconscious that she'd physically show up in this sort of thing while Tim does.

Anyways, since this places us really close to the end of the pre-reboot world, there's really not that much more with the two of them together afterwards, just a few interactions over in Teen Titans like Tim trying to reaffirm Kon how he can as they're stuck going against some clones of him at the end:

Conner: Look at him, Tim. Looks just like I did. Tim: They're not you, Conner. Conner: Aren't they? Didn't I start out the same way? A blank slate? Tim: It's not who you were, it's who you are. You have a life, and friends, and a family. Conner: Good point. I have a lot. And I aim to keep it that way. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #100)

And then I mean, reboots happen, Kon's gone for a hot sec, and now he's back since Young Justice 2019. Conner's one of the only people who for sure remembers all this above stuff I just mentioned, his memories of the pre-Flashpoint world are untouched because he was absent for the reboots. Meaning even as Tim's feelings and memories have changed and been taken away and restored... Kon's have been exactly how they were, just with the added layer of "Kon has missed everyone while he was stuck on Gemworld." Since coming back there wasn't all that much focus on just the two of them from Kon's side, until the little bit we got in Urban Legends actually:

Conner: You know, I think I heard from you more when I was dead. Tim: Superboy? Stephanie called you, didn't she? Conner: She's worried. Thinks you're acting weird. I told her it must be a day ending in Y. Tim: You wouldn't call if you weren't worried, too. Conner: What's going on, Tim? Who's Bernard? Tim: He's a... friend. He's in trouble. Conner: Can I help? What do you need? Tim: ...I don't know, Conner. (Batman: Urban Legends #5)

This interaction as a whole just fascinates me, and Fitzmartin's choice to include it in Tim's coming out story in general. Conner's line about when he was dead just... to me that has read since this dropped as "I know you were so desperate to have me around when I was dead that you tried to clone me, but now that i'm here again you're barely talking to me." Which... lots to unpack there combined with all the questions and Kon's clear concern... especially if we consider the 'saying you tried to clone me was kinda like an informal confession of feelings' idea as something in the back of Conner's mind. With him now seeming... kinda frustrated/concerned that Tim's not paying even close to that kind of attention to him anymore. Him asking about Bernard like this and getting such vague answers from Tim (as Tim's being in general cagey and avoidant) also just makes me really curious about how Kon will like, respond to finding out Bernard is now Tim's boyfriend, I can just see so many different ways it could go.

But anyways, basically.... my ultimate point in all of this is less to say there's a definitive "Yes, Kon is 100% clearly in love with Tim" indication, but more to point out "There's a framework here to support the idea of Kon having thoughts/feelings for Tim comparable to those he's had for love interests in the past," if that... ah... makes sense?

Anyways if you read all of this- I hope it even remotely made sense!

#okay i can't reread and edit this anymore my brain will melt #u wanted thousands of words of me talking abt timkon? u got it #sam explains

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princess-of-inarizaki · 4 years ago

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hello ! if ur requests are currently open, can i get headcanons / scenario of inarizakis manager having a celeb crush (like finn wolfhard, louis partridge ALSO if u can, can u please make the celeb crush louis patridge ? im kinda desperate for sum louis x reader scenarios lawl) and they let them simp for him cuz it's just a crush right ? right, what they don't know is that manager-chan has made some attempts for him (their celeb crush) to notice them and they have successfully made him notice them bc manager chan is such a charm, so what will be their reactions if they see manager chan holding hands with the celeb crush that they didn't worry ab ? thank u in advance if u do it ! but it's fine if ur requests aren't open,, i just didn't see any posts ab ur requests being closed hehe also sorry if i did this wrong 😭 this is my first time requesting sumthn 😭😭

Louis Patridge x Inarizaki manager

Oh my goshhh hi bb. I'm so glad I was your first :D (yes, initially, requests were closed, unfortunately) but this was literally such a good one, I couldn't resist writing it. (I'm in love with Louis Patridge too, bubs)

Also, just a tip (if you're gonna request on anon, make sure you follow me, or have my profile saved because tumblr doesn't give you a notification when I've answered you 🥺🥺)

🦋; Inarizaki manager (reader) x Louis Patridge (celeb crush) x Inarizaki vbc ,, triggers: none!!

“Guys. DID YOU WATCH ENOLA HOLMES?” your breathless face was red due to fact that you've ran a long way, obviously to tell them this.

Atsumu and Osamu nodded in unison, “Yea, that Millie Bobbi Brown chick acted prett' well”

Suna rolled his eyes. “Hated it. Only watched it for Superman, though.”

Kita shrugged, walked up to you, and shook his head as he smoothed your hair down (the stray curls obviously came undone as you were running). “I don't watch fictious movies, y/n-san. Was it good?”

Eyes sparkling, you nodded. “It was more than good. Besides, that actor, Louis Patridge? The guy who plays Lord Tewkesbury? I think I'm in love with him.” a dream-like look glazed over your eyes as you stared at your phone wallpaper wistfully.

Suddenly, the bell rang, jolting you back to reality. “Oh that's right, I need to go to class now.”, and with that, you left six very stunned boys in the gym.

“I wonder what'll be of her crush on that' actor?” asked Atsumu with a smirk. Don't be fooled though, behind the easygoing exterior, he was the most concerned of the lot (and the most jealous).

“Yer' overthinking it. They live oceans apart, and he plays movies on the big screen.” drawled Osamu.

“Yeah, I'm sure one of us still has more chance with her than him, she's actually met us, after all.” chirped Akagi, with a positive note. He was determined to win you over, and a celeb crush didn't deter him in any way.

Suna nodded, whilst Kita and Aran exchanged looks. “It's important to be supportive of her though. Albeit it being merely a schoolgirl crush, this could mean a lot to her.” said Kita, and his tone invited no further disagreement.

Back at home that evening, thoughts of the handsome brown haired boy could not leave your mind, and you logged onto Instagram, hoping to see if he had posted any updates.

He had, and it was a selfie of himself, with his tousled hair in all its "I-just-got-out-of-bed" glory. Damn, this man was sexy.

Smiling, you typed out a comment. “No offense, but if being adorable was a crime, you'd have fine written all over you ˃ᴗ˂ ”. Yes, it was dorky, and cheesy all in one. But why not? He might not ever read it anyways, as your comment got swept underneath the hundreds of others that came after it.

Sighing, you settled down to study, with thoughts about the comment and Louis pushed out of your mind.

Meanwhile, as Louis scrolled through his comments, a single one caught his eye. She used a pickup line (how adorable) which caused his cheeks to redden. Tentatively, he surveyed her profile, before feeling the familiar sensation of having a crush, wash over him.

She was gorgeous, and although he knew he shouldn't stalk random pretty girls over the internet, he couldn't help himself. Her pictures showed her to be the manager of a club of some sort, and she was almost always posing with a teammate. A male, teammate.

But damn, that smile. Even if he felt a small pit of unfounded jealousy at the guys, her smile was enough to distract him from anything.

His fingers hovered over the "follow back" button, before he finally gave in to temptation by following her, commenting, and putting his phone away quickly, suddenly feeling like a schoolboy all over again.

That morning, before school, you could barely believe the notifications waiting for you on your phone.

"louispatridge_ is following you"

"louispatridge_ commented: nah, if anyone's fine, it's gotta be you ˃ᴗ˂ "

Of course, after having seven mini panic attacks, and fawning over him, you set out to tell your boys at the volleyball club the good news.

And all you could think about on the way there was how Louis Patridge somehow noticed you. It was unbelievable, and somehow turned your insides to jelly.

As soon as you reached the gym, you flung yourself on Atsumu, engulfing him in a hug. “Guys I'm so happy” you managed to choke out.

Atsumu obviously enjoyed holding you, and he gently wrapped his arms around you to feel your heart beating quickly

“To what do we owe the pleasure of seeing you this early, y/n?” joked Aran.

Wordlessly, you dug into your pocket and pulled out your phone. “He thinks I'm fine. Fine means hot right? I mean, I used it meaning hot. Because he is hot. And he thinks the same of me, that's gotta be good? And the emoticon. He used the same one, he's so cu—”

But you were interrupted out of your whisper-babble by the boys' shocked faces. He noticed her? This fast? “I'm so happy for you, y/n” said Akagi cheerfully, but internally he was demotivated and sad at the prospect of you dating the young star.

Suna looked at you thoughtfully and ruffled your hair. “That's my girl. She's just as amazing and capable as those girls on the silver screen.” and although it pained him to say this, he just wanted to share your happiness.

The twins were withdrawn, and Kita congratulated you, whilst obviously feeling a bit regretful for dismissing it as a "schoolgirl crush".

In general, the boys were upset, but not surprised. If you had them all collectively whipped for you, why not a movie star?

After kissing Suna's cheek and waving the rest of the boys off, you skipped all the way to homeroom, excited to share the news with your friends.

Silence followed your absence as Aran shrugged. “So are we gonna acknowledge the elephant in the room?”

Atsumu pouted and glared at them all. “Why did he have to notice her? Was it her profile picture? I've always asked her to change it, she looks way too attractive.”

Osamu nodded and jutted his bottom lip. “I mean, we think she's the most beautiful girl in the world, and apparently other guys do too.”

“Oh God make it stop” whispered Suna. “I wish she'd just stay ours. I don't mind competing with you guys, I'm obviously better, but that actor dude? No chance.”

“We'll be supportive” reaffirmed Kita. “Above all, she's out friend and we do not own her. If this makes her happy, we won't ruin it.”. Akagi and Aran were quiet.

Ever since that day, you and Louis have been slowly but steadily growing closer and falling harder for each other.

He tried his luck by texting you, and although you were shy and tentative at first, getting to know the real him was refreshing.

And you really did like him. He was intelligent, adorable, and realistic. The two of you spent your time from dusk till' dawn talking, whether on call or on text.

And no one could deny the blossoming chemistry between yourself and Louis. He was a gentleman in every way, and his honeyed words stuck in your heart, finding its way to be replayed every time you felt down.

The boys slowly saw you drifting away. And when you weren't, it was always "Louis this—" or “Louis said—” and frankly their hearts couldn't take it anymore. It was time to give up, and love you as a friend instead.

But immersed in his attention you barely even noticed.

One day, Louis called you as you were heading home after practice. “y/n! Love, guess what?”

“aw bubs, just tell me. I hate guessing. Mostly because I suck at it.”

You could hear him chuckle on the other side of the line as he softly whispered “I'm coming to Japan on the ninth!”

“Wait, Louis. Today's the ninth.”

“I know. So are you gonna come to that bubble tea place you won't shut up about, or must I come get you?”

“You're joking”

“I'm not. I've wanted to surprise you, and I swear it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Which includes getting kicked by a horse on set, but nevermind about that, y/n, I want to see you, so get your arse here.”

“Coming, Lord Tewkesbury”

“I might have a kink.”

You blushed bright red at his words. “shut up oh my gosh, I'll be there.”

Louis ended the call with a small smile on his face. He knew how easily flustered you were with him and he loved it. It was just another thing on the list of all the reasons why Louis Patridge adored you to hell and back.

The whole way to the shop, your heart was pounding. So you'd finally get to meet the guy you've been dreaming about ever since you laid eyes on him in a movie.

Ever since those late night phone calls and early morning texts made your heart race and eyes sparkle with wonder.

You were finally meeting him.

The familiar sweet smell of the tea washed over you, and a familiar face waited for you at the entrance. His brown eyes looked gorgeous in the sun and his hair was tousled exactly the way you once saw in a selfie.

Wasting no time, you ran to him, pulling him to a hug. He laughed and caught you in his arms, holding you closer as your legs wrapped around his waist. No words were exchanged, just touches. There were too many words said already.

After pulling away, he gently stroked his thumb through your features. Tucking a strand aside, ruffling your hair. His hands ached to touch you, and now, finally, he could.

“You're such a dork.” was all you could whisper, afraid speaking loudly would break the spell.

“Your dork. All yours.”

“Louis!” your voice went an octave higher as the familiar warm sensation came over your cheeks, painting them a delicate pink.

“Oh God, I've always wanted to see you blush. How can you be so adorable?? Oh God.”

You whined in protest, but frankly, you were too happy to be around him to care much at all.

Tipping your chin to face him, Louis Patridge did the one thing he dreamt of doing, ever since he stalked through your Instagram profile one fateful morning.

He kissed you.

And wouldn't you know it? You kissed him back. It was warm, comforting, and everything you thought it'd be.

Meanwhile, the boys had finished cleaning up the gym, and started heading home.

“Hey guys, do you wanna go grab some bubble tea?” asked Aran. The prospect of food, or sweet things always cheered up the boys, and after a day of particularly grueling practice, it was no surprise they agreed at once.

You however, were comfortably nestled next to Louis as you swapped stories. Your hands never left each other, though. He kept stroking your palm, just to remind himself you were here, right next to him.

“So how's the volleyball club, Mrs. manager?”

“Mrs? Do I look like I'm married?” to which Louis responded with a shrug and wink.

Coincidentally, the Inarizaki boys entered the shop at that very moment, freezing in their tracks after seeing you in a booth with Louis.

“Psst. Guys. Loverboy's here.”

“Should we say hello?”

“I might cry if they kiss” whimpered Akagi.

“We need to say hello, it's the right thing to do.” said Kita sensibly, as he walked up to the two of you. “Hello y/n-san, Louis-san.” said Kita with a slight nod.

Happily, you rose from your seat and hugged the captain, thanking him for saying hi, as you introduced him to Louis.

Soon, the other boys came around and one by one, introduced themselves as well. Honestly speaking, they were jealous. How could they possibly get over someone like you? Someone as spectacular and beautiful as you? But when they saw you face shining with radiance as you smiled at Louis, and the way his hands never left yours, they understood.

And they wanted you to be happy. That was the most important thing, above all else for the both of them.

“I love you, manager-chan.”

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oidheadh-con-culainn · 3 years ago

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What are the major details that confused you about the Hound blurb? The major one that stood put to me was the "way of the farmer opposed to the sword" thing which felt very...un-Cú Chulainn. Also, if you don't mind expanding further, which details didn't you question/be confused by?

and also for anon:

okay so it is like. 2am so there are not going to be any sources here but i can't sleep so here goes!! i will go through this blurb line by line and give youse my thoughts

In 50 BCE,

reasonable. this is roughly the right time period for when the ulster cycle is set. maybe marginally earlier than i'd place cú chulainn, but i'm talking a few years, nothing to get worked up about.

Morrigan, the goddess of war,

fine. normally i'm wary of pantheonising impulses with regard to irish characters (almost none of them can be identified as a god of anything in particular, it doesn't work like that) but tbh the morrigan is like, the most plausible exception to that, so whatever. normally her name has the definite article attached to it because it's kind of a species term as well but whatevs.

has become restless as a long-lasting peace settles over Ireland.

dubious. closest i can think of to peace being reference in any texts is togail bruidne da derga talking about conaire mor's reign being like, prosperous and peaceful and whatever, and even there you've got díberg (plundering/reaving) which is what eventually fucks him over and starts the otherworldly hell spiral situation. that's roughly the right period here but conaire's doom proves you don't have to do much to nudge peace into war, and connacht and ulster are at each other's throats for years before cú chulainn comes on the scene anyway

Deciding the time of peace must end, she chooses Setanta, the nephew of the king of the north, to become her ward.

hmm. i mean. like, this isn't the WEIRDEST choice they could have made. it's still completely made-up, don't get me wrong -- cú chulainn has a lot of different foster parents in different texts and they don't agree with each other but none of them ever mentions the morrígan. but like, they do have a connection of some sort, as evidenced by their conversations. and there's that one moment in the r1 boyhood deeds where little cú chulainn is out on the battlefield and hears her (not sure which name is used here) calling out to him and it like. motivates him to do some deeds or whatever, and i guess you could extrapolate that into some kind of teaching capacity.

so like. could be weirder. if you're gonna pick anyone, you could do worse. still seems weird to me! but not on its own a major issue, i could get past this and consider it a Fun But Unorthodox Creative Decision

(the fact that she tries to seduce him in the táin probably wouldn't get in the way of this considering sleeping with his teachers/foster-mothers is far from unheard of where cú chulainn is concerned)

After a young Setanta slays the demon-hound of Cullan, he becomes known as Cú Cullan—The Hound of Cullan.

weird spelling choices, they could have at least bothered to use the genitive properly. also the hound isn't a demon, it's a ferocious watchdog -- making it sound all Otherworldly and Hellish like this kinda confuses the issue of why he would need to take its place. he needs to take its place because the cattle and people still need protecting because it is a watchdog!! but whatevs, again, it's a brief summary so they can't exactly give us all the details and this is not actively objectionable

As Cú Cullan grows older, it is apparent that an extraordinary power lies within him … and a great darkness.

ugh boring. this makes it sound like he's going to be ~tortured~ and angsty about it. give me an unapologetic murder teen please. is the ríastrad dark? sure i guess, if you're going to be boring about it. it's more like, grotesque neon in my head

When he chooses the quiet life of a farmer over the sword,

this would fucking never happen on like five different levels. obviously like anyone who has ever read anything about cú chulainn can see that this is not in his nature. he is never going to choose a quiet life. this is the kid who tricked his way into taking arms before everyone thought he was ready. also juxtaposed with the "darkness" comment makes it sound like he would Angst his way into this quiet life which. again. have you seen this kid. he is an unapologetic murder teen

the only thing i can think of that might make him temporarily want to walk away is connla's death which... depends where you position that in the timeline really, he does seem a bit fucked up by it and maybe he'd want a holiday although i can see that lasting precisely 5 minutes before someone pissed him off enough for him to murder them. but if he's being raised by the morrígan i can't see him going to train with scáthach so then he'd never meet aífe and therefore connla would never be born so that wouldn't happen. so like. whatever.

but also like. he would not become a farmer. he just wouldn't! it doesn't work! the ireland of the stories is super hierarchical, right? and this blurb has already fucking told us that he's the king's nephew (canon) so we can tell that being a farmer is Not His Place. when we see upper class figures becoming menial labourers in texts, like in cath maige tuired, it's because Things Are Fucked, Shit's Gone Wrong. people don't just decide to change their entire social class on a whim lmfao

if cú chulainn really wanted to turn his back on being a warrior he could probably make recourse to certain other Suitable Professions ... his grandad's a druid so he might have a route into that, though his dad's not so that might fuck things up a bit bc it's one of those things that's usually inherited. he does give "wisdom" in at least one text though and we also know he can write (he carves riddles in ogham in the táin) and he composes verses on various occasions so idk, maybe something in a poetic direction, though again, usually requires two generations of inheritance to be a real poet and not just a lower-class bard. warrior's kinda the main thing he's got open to him tbh. but farming? i'm not a legal expert but as far as i'm aware based on what i have read, that would fuck shit up

more likely an upset cú chulainn would just go off in search of an adventure somewhere conveniently far away until he'd calmed down (alba, or the tyrrhenian sea, or -- if we're going to get early modern about it -- somewhere like india, which frequently gets thrown into the texts with absolutely no cultural context and it's always hilarious)

Morrigan, angry at the betrayal,

of the entire social order, yes,

instigates an invasion of his homeland

i mean. if they intend this to be the táin then.... táin bó regamna does kinda make the morrígan responsible for it? not in the sense of triggering the pillow talk argument that it's in the book of leinster -- it's her getting up to her usual cow-nicking behaviours for shits and giggles. [note to readers: it is probably for more than shits and giggles but did i mention it's 2am]

but all in all, not particularly out of character that she would be at least some way responsible for this so i can vibe with this. echtra nerai also supports the TBR explanation with her fucking around with otherworldly cows and pissing people off so, yeah, whatever. the morrígan engineered this. sure.

and Cú Cullan must challenge fate itself

this is probably a controversial stance but fate feels like a difficult concept to apply to medieval irish texts. like are people sometimes Doomed? yes. there are prophecies, there are gessi, there's all manner of otherworldly fuckery that can trip you up. is that the same thing as fate? no idea. considering cú chulainn comes out alive from the táin though and his doom prophecies don't catch up to him for like, at least another decade, maybe 16 years depending on who you listen to, hard to see how that would apply here

to keep the goddess at bay.

again like she IS causing fuckery in the táin but also it's like... one time. really not the main character. but she or maybe just some crows, hard to say, do get implicated in the death tale so maybe they're doing what people often do and conflating the two? even though there's like 10-16 years in between them?

anyway as you can see i don’t think it’s wholly terrible / i’m not completely thinkshaming it. like, having cú chulainn raised by the morrígan is unorthodox but it could be a fun and creative direction so i don't object to it. making cú chulainn get sad about murder and choose to be a farmer is just fucking laughable tho, and makes me doubt their characterisations in general. so that's offputting and would probably make me think twice about buying it, if that had ever been on the cards.*

and of course sure, their cú chulainn can be a Sad Boy Who Likes Sheep, but that means he's not the cú chulainn of medieval irish lit / irish myth, because that cú chulainn is a feral murder teen who keeps killing his friends and also is way too high social status to ever be a farmer, and whose only relationship to livestock is as the watchdog who kills anyone trying to harm them (which is an important role on a farm! but like. not the same thing as Being A Farmer. mostly because it involves more murder and is essentially just an extension of his role as a warrior. or rather the other way around. he promises to protect mag muirthemne as a watchdog and this like. gets extended into him becoming its sole defender)

this has been my analysis of this blurb i hope you enjoyed it

it's now 2.30am i should try and sleep now that i've exorcised a few thoughts from my head

*as i mentioned in the tags of my other post, i don't tend to read graphic novels due to disability stuff. they're much harder for me to understand and follow than prose, to the point where some are incomprehensible, so i don't really enjoy them. there are a few i've read, but they tend to be short ones, and i'm usually not reading them in order, just admiring the art separately from the text. so it's unlikely i would read a graphic novel of this size anyway.

#cu chulainn #hound #hound graphic novel #answered #oddnub-eye #anonymous #irish mythology #medieval irish #tain bo cuailnge

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tossawary · 4 years ago

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Hey there! Just wanted to know if I could write fics based off your anon prompts? Bc some of them are pretty in-line with my idea of sqh, but I'm not sure who I should credit? Hope you don't mind clarifying, xoxo!

Ah, yeah, anon asks/prompts make it difficult to share credit around sometimes. Option 1 for me is asking the anon to come forward if they would like “credit” in the form of AO3 gift and if they don’t, to respect the fact that they might want their participation in fandom to stay anonymous. Option 2 is to just link to the ask or something if I feel like the interaction is worth mentioning.

Credit sometimes feels like the wrong word here. Sometimes inspiration is more accurate, I think. If I write 250 words of a basic premise or make a tweet that just says, “What if Sha Hualing was 2 meters tall like MBJ?” and you write 10,000 words of actual fanfiction, it would be rude as hell (on my part) and also incorrect to say that I should get half the “credit” for your fic. Giving a shout-out for credit/inspiration is a fandom courtesy, not a necessary business contract.

I don’t know how to phrase this, but you (speaking generally to everyone here, not just to you, Anon) don’t have to ask me permission to take over a basic premise? Or even a longer but still basic fic idea? I mean, if you completely took over a full and detailed outline of mine without asking permission first or giving any credit as a courtesy, I’d be very pissed off because I think that’s rude. Planning a fanfiction is work!

But I’m not going to get in anyone’s face because they wrote a “moshang forced marriage au” or a fic in which “SQH works for Demon Emperor TLJ” without asking and receiving “my permission” (I am not the authority here and, though it’s besides the point, I’ll probably be delighted, tbh) even if they were directly inspired by my posts about it. I am not your Fandom Parent, you know?

With basic premises, just go for it! This is fandom and no one really has “rights” to any fanfiction or fanart idea. I’ve had someone directly plagiarize my fanfiction before (including fic structure and direct dialogue including identical jokes) and honestly? I just let it go. It wasn’t worth my time to harass them over it. Plagiarizing work and being inspired (or having a case of convergent evolution) are super different things. I will, however, get in people’s faces with my feathers all fluffed if they decide to write one of my fic premises and then they come at me when I get around to making my own take on the fic premise too, or because they happened to have a similar fic idea independently and earlier.

(Alternative interpretation of this ask: If this is about my prompt list of “A Guide to Troubled Birds” quotes, you definitely don’t have to credit me for that. I mean, you can say, “Thanks to Tossawary for making a SVSSS prompt list of ‘A Guide to Troubled Birds’ quotes! They go super well together!” But you really don’t have to do that. Like, they’re not mine.)

If you feel like you want to share where your inspiration for a fanfiction came from, you can either Option A: give a shout-out in your Author’s Notes (“This is the interaction or post that inspired my fic!”) OR Option B: if you use AO3, you can use AO3′s “inspired by” feature and they’ll make the link for you, even if your inspiration is a random tumblr post or a tweet.

Quick tutorial with simple HTML code and images below.

OPTION A

Creating a link in your author’s notes on AO3 is really easy. Just write:

<a href=“URL”>Text that will become a link.</a>

Like:

If you enjoyed my fic, come follow me on <a href=“https://tossawary.tumblr.com/”>Tumblr</a>!

OPTION B

When creating or editing your work, find “This work is a remix, a translation, a podfic, or was inspired by another work.” and click the box.

As AO3 will tell you, if you were inspired by another AO3 fic, all you need to do is give them the URL and they’ll fill out all the other categories. If you’re linking to a tumblr post or a tweet, you’ll need to fill these out yourself.

Let’s say you were inspired by that anon with the Transmigrator Liu Mingyan concept. You’ll need the post or tweet URL. You’ll need to give it a title, probably “[Subject] Tumblr Post” or “[Subject] Tweet” will do, like “Transmigrator Liu Mingyan Tumblr Ask”. And you’ll need to name the people involved, which in this case is “Tossawary & Anonymous”.

This will create something in your beginning Author’s Notes that says “Inspired by Transmigrator Liu Mingyan Tumblr Ask by Tossawary & Anonymous”.

If you click that link, it will take you to a blurb that looks like this:

If you click that link AGAIN, it will take you to the URL you submitted.

Which could be the original tumblr post or original tweet, like so, or the tumblr post or tweet reblogged/retweeted to your own account. (There’s always a chance that the OP might delete the original post or tweet.)

Hope that’s clear, Anon! Have fun!

#Anonymous #ask tossawary #tossawary svsss #tossawary updates

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ironmandeficiency · 4 years ago

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Okay, I like shipping people quite a lot, you're also doing ships and I sent one, and you have an "about me" and briefly described your personality as part of an ask game a while ago, so let's do this!! I'm only doing Pedro because I'm nowhere near caught up with the Clone Wars, btw. But I do believe that I ship you with either Din or Oberyn (more Din than Oberyn, but there's a case to be made for both).

Let's start with Din. You mention that you work with kids with special needs, and Din has a kid with special needs (granted, said kid levitates mudhorns and can choke people from his pram, but that's still special needs, right??). Also, Din is someone who can be quite closed off and has difficulty being friendly, and I think someone with a contrasting personality such as your ENFP self would be a great help to him (as long as you respect his boundaries, of course, but I don't think that'll be a problem). You would be the face of the operation, talking to people and being friendly to get information/help when threatening them doesn't work (it should be the other way around, but this is Din we're talking about, so...). His job also involves a lot of traveling among the stars, so if you went with him you'd have plenty of opportunities to make the most killer photos in different planets. It's not all perfect, though. Din is extremely protective, and your tendency towards taking "stupid risks" would worry and annoy the hell out of this poor man. You also mention dropping everything to help others, something that would also kind of annoy him (but secretly he would be impressed with your helpful nature and even a little inspired, you make him want to be a better person). As I said, man might get annoyed with you at times, but it's just because he loves you and can't stand the thought of losing you to a preventable death (please don't make him lose anyone else, he's just started forming a family, if he lost it again I'm not sure he'd be able to come back from it)

And then there's Oberyn Martell, your Dornish prince. Listen, dude has 8 daughters, and depending on when you two start romancing each other they may be quite young, so you being good with kids is pretty much a requirement for a serious relationship with this man. You also mentioned at some point that your sexuality is ??? and you posted a picrew where you had a bi flag pin, so I'm going with you being multiple gender attracted, which is also essentially a requirement here. I don't know how sex positive you are, or how you'd feel about an open relationship, but assuming you're okay with everything, a relationship with this man could be exactly what you need. You are in Dorne, where it's pretty hot but there's also a sizeable coast line for you to swim in the ocean like the fish you are. There's also the water gardens, I'm sure there's a proper swimming pool in there somewhere. And then there's your prince, a man who loves as fiercely and as passionately as a raging sea loves the coast. He'll downright spoil you if you let him, and he'll love you for your sunny disposition and creativity. This is a man who writes love poems for his daughters, so you can bet he'd appreciate the hell out of you being a sentimental softie. Also, if you like Ellaria too you can consider yourself a part of the most powerful power throuple in Westeros.

An that's everything I have to say about that, have a nice day! ~ 🍪

...... i’ve had this sitting in my inbox for a whole day and i cannot, for the life of me, find the right words to express how much i love this. i read it the first time and was watery-eyed bc very few ppl in my life have ever done smth so sweet for me. you mentioned things that were so long ago/hella detailed and i was like “ohmygod they must have been following me for a WHILE and like they care?? holy shit??” and just- ohmygod honey you’ve got me in a whole ass other dimension of existence with this.

and then, at the end of that beautiful ask i saw the 🍪 signoff and was like “HOLY SHIT COOKIE ANON HAS BLESSED ME?! HOW AM I WORTHY?!” and immediately messaged @scribbledghost and text-blubbered that the famous cookie anon paid me a visit and made me happy cry (i’ve seen you on their blog all the time and i love you)

you hit every bull’s eye with this and my heart is so full. i’m gonna treasure this for a long while

#🍪 anon #my heart is so full #din djarin #oberyn martell #jj gets shipped #i was not ready #i’m 🥺🥺🥺#i cannot believe you blessed me #i’m cherished

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for-ests · 5 years ago

Text

Always Enough- Peter Parker x Reader

Okay so this imagine was an anon request that I had previously posted, but I accidentally deleted. I didn't mean to, so here’s a re-upload. Happy finals & sorry my dumbass clicked the wrong button on tumblr mobile because im stupid

Summary (bc the request deleted w/ the post): The reader realizes she had been neglecting Peter because she was stressed over school. Peter thinks there might be another reason because she has become distant. Confrontation and angst follows!

Word count: 2, 360

✭♡✭♡✭♡✭

Finals were a killer, especially for a nursing major like yourself. The stress of it all made you want to curl up into a ball and cry. Cry for hours until you couldn't cry no more.

But that wasn't an option. What you dreamed of becoming, something simple, yet incredibly difficult, was growing out of reach. Your hours of studying had led you nowhere, only to barely tangible grades. Grades that were barely above average. You were disappointed, discouraged, and running out of options.

What else would you do with your life? Becoming a nurse was the only thing you had ever wanted to be, it was all you knew. Ever since aliens rained in the sky, your only motive was to help the ones who couldn't help themselves. But how could you ever hope to do that when you couldn't pass biochem?

What didn't help your anxious mind was the house you had to stress over, and your minimum wage restaurant job that didn't add to your required expertise. Tears welled in your eyes as you remembered you had to lay a payment down on your ever-increasing student loans. Maybe college wasn't for you. Perhaps it was never meant to be. Your summer money was running out and fast.

Just breathe. You repeated. I don't have time to cry.

You could cry after you studied. And right now, you had barely glanced at your flashcards for more than ten minutes. It seemed like you were paralyzed, sitting in bed with your flashcards scattered around you, all of them laid out and waiting for involvement.

Just as you were about to pick up the first card, your phone buzzed beside you. Instinctively, you glanced at it, your heart dropping when you saw Peter's name flash across the screen.

Date. You had a date night, and you forgot.

"Fuck!" You cursed out loud, the tears you had tried so hard to control seeming to burst over your eyelids. How could you forget?

Peter: I'll be there in 15 minutes :D

You replied immediately, glancing at yourself in the phone's reflection. You looked terrible and distraught beyond compare.

Y/N: Peter…im so sorry I forgot, i'm not ready

Peter: oh

Y/N: i have a huge exam soon, maybe its for the best that we rain check? i'm sorry I know ive done this before but im really stressed about it

Peter: we havent talked for days, y/n, i think theres more going on than what youre telling me

Y/N: what? of course not wtf

Peter: im coming over anyways, ill be there soon

Y/N: why?

Peter: we have to talk.

Your heart dropped down to your stomach. Those words were what you had been dreading, and all focus you had managed to gather vanished into thin air. You knew you had been neglecting Peter's affections. Even if every fiber in your being wanted to make him the single most important thing in your life.

It had been almost a week since you'd seen him, and honestly, it was painful in the most innocent way.

But Peter didn't have to worry like you did. He was gifted and already had his entire life ahead of him, set in the middle of Stark industries. But you never asked for a handout, you never asked for help. Even though you knew he was the smartest young man around. You were proud to be his, and the thought of that disappearing was more detrimental to you that failing your upcoming exam.

Y/N: ok, front door is open

Tears were rolling down your cheeks at this point. You had been with Peter for over a year and had gone without seeing him for longer, but he was right. This time was different. This was the third date you had canceled without wanting to, but sometimes apologizing wasn't enough. Peter deserved a lengthy explanation of what you were really going through.

You were so used to holding back your emotions, that times like this were an occasional reoccurrence. You had always been so afraid of unloading your burdens onto others that you still sometimes forgot that having a boyfriend came with that perk. He was still going to love and cherish you if you asked for help and advice. Hell, you needed to realize that he wanted to.

That was a factor of why you were so in love with Peter. He always listened, and sometimes, even push the truth out of you when he could tell you needed it.

"You're already crying, huh." A sad smile was on Peter's face as he opened the door. His sudden appearance startled you, and you managed to chuckle despite the circumstances.

"You know me." You sniffled, immediately embarrassed by the state he had caught you in. Instinctively, you brushed your hair to the side and dabbed the tears from under your eyes. You could feel the remnants of Make-up drying to your skin.

"I didn't mean to ruin your study-"

"But we need to talk." You finished, shoving your school supplies to the edge of the bed. You made enough room, so he was able to sit comfortably.

Slightly embarrassed, you kept your gaze averted as best as you could. Just Peter's presence made your heart flutter, and a part of you was trying to prepare for the worst. You might really lose him this time. And for what? Yes, school was incredibly important, so, so important. But so was Peter, and you needed to find a balance.

Your silence was enough to beckon Peter's thoughts into the open.

"I just need to make sure you're still serious… about us." His voice was soft as if it was struggling to stay neutral.

Finally, gaining the courage to look at him, you locked eyes. Peter's gaze was heavy and forthcoming, and it took all of your willpower to swallow the knot in your throat.

"Of course, I am." The conviction was entirely evident in your tone. So much so, that Peter fell silent. His accusations seemed to die in his throat, but he knew that if he didn't get them out now, they would creep back to him later.

"It's hard to tell sometimes," Peter muttered, unable to gaze at your confused expression. You looked so hurt.

Your silence beckoned him to continue.

"I haven't properly talked with you in a week. You've canceled our last three dates… it seems like you never want to hang out with me anymore."

Peter winced. He was a grown man, and he sounded like a child. Yet, he had let so many things slide, hoping you would come around, hoping you would make it up to him. Perhaps he had been selfish to only think of himself in the relationship. He failed to realize that maybe in attempts to please him, you were putting your own future on the line.

"I know you're going through a lot, but you can't even seem to talk about it." Peter's shoulders felt tense, his eyebrows knitting together in an agitated expression. His leg was bouncing up and down uncontrollably. He looked like he was about to burst.

"I'm sorry." You said, trying to swallow the knot in your throat. Pausing, you tried to gather your thoughts into cohesive sentences that would soothe his anxious mind.

"There's nobody else, right?" He suddenly blurted, actually turning his head to look at you. Insecurity was glazed in his eyes for the first time.

"Why would you even think that?" You said, startled. The question felt as if he had shoved your head underwater and held it there just long enough for you to choke on the liquid.

His expression was blank for the first time. Vulnerability at its finest. "My life isn't perfect, you know. I overthink just like you. I need reassurance."

Peter was so calm, so calm that it worried you. Though you were already afraid of how this conversation would go, it hurt you to realize that this conversation was the result of your actions. You failed to make Peter feel special like you had promised. Like he had promised you. Relationships go both ways, and for the last couple of weeks, it had only gone one.

"No, Peter. There will never be anyone else."

He sighed, relaxing slightly. "You've been acting weird. I don't really know what to think."

"I told you a billion times, I'm studying. After work, that's literally all I do. And I need to focus."

"I feel like there's more. It feels weird to not see a text from you when I wake up. It feels weird to not hear your voice. I don't… I don't like it, Y/N. Even if that's selfish."

And selfish it was. Peter expected you to be transparent while he was hiding possibly the biggest secret in the world. Maybe that was why he was so worried about how much you loved him. Peter wanted to be honest with you. He wanted you to know he was spider-man, but right now, he still couldn't bring himself to. Perhaps he was looking for a reason.

"I'm sorry." Your hands were clenched in your lap. "I've never had to deal with this before. Everything is so new, even if we've been together for a year. I've never cared about anyone like this, and I can't manage my time."

Peter paused as if every word in this conversation pained him to no end. His eyes were glossy, his mind unclear. He was desperately trying to understand why you were isolating himself. "You can't make any time for me?"

"That's the thing, I can't focus on anything else when I'm with you." Your lip quivered. "And that's a problem."

"It's not for me." He said quickly. "I make time for you, and you don't for me. And you need to tell me why."

You glanced away, embarrassed. No matter what you said, the reason wouldn't be good enough. You were just a bad girlfriend.

Peter reached his hand out and pulled you to him. You rested your chin upon his shoulder, soothed to feel his warmth once again. "You need to tell me, Y/N. We've made it work for this long, and all of a sudden, it stopped."

Your body started to shake. Trying to muffle your sob, you brought your hand to your mouth. It was all too much.

"-You have your whole life together, Peter. I have nothing, I still have to work for it. I'm not as smart as you, I'm-"and that's when the tears started to flow. It was a literal flood, tear after tear poured over your eyelids until they were bloodshot, until pressure pounded through your head.

Before you could finish, your face was pressed against Peter's chest. He held you tightly, his sweatshirt dabbing up your tears of sorrow. You gripped tightly to him, releasing the stress that had been building up inside of you for the last two weeks.

He did not know what else to do. Showing you that he loved you seemed like the most viable option. Sometimes all you had to do was listen, and that was enough.

"I got a bad grade on my midterm exam, one that I didn't study for because I spent my time with you—I thought-"

"Shh." He stroked your hair, understanding what you meant without a complete explanation.

"I work so hard, and it's never enough-"

"It's always enough, Y/N."

"I got so caught up in it that I neglected you in the process. So much so that you thought I was cheating on you" you inhaled sharply, whimpering against him, so many different emotions swirling through your mind. "You're the best thing in my life, and I put you second…"

"Look at me, Y/N." He cupped your cheeks in a swift movement, forcing you to look at him through tear-filled eyes. "You are enough for me. That's why I bothered to have this conversation with you. That's why I care." He pressed his lips against your forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too, Peter." You tilted your head up to kiss him wholly on the lips. You were a mess, but Peter had always told you that you looked beautiful when you cried.

"Rosy cheeks." He whispered, patting down your hair, inhaling your scent, and appreciating the beauty you constantly radiated.

You chuckled, sniffling loudly. Peter always said that after you had a successful mental break down, your cheeks brandished a rosy shade.

"Shut up." You whispered, tightening your grip around his torso. His back fell against your bed, and you shifted to lay completely on top of him. The firmness of his chest underneath you caused instant relaxation, instant relief. Maybe, just maybe, being in his presence was enough to get rid of the stress from everyday life.

The corners of your eyes were raw and red, yet it complimented your shade. Peter vowed from the moment he had met you, that he would never let any harm come to you. The last thing Peter had ever expected was that he might be the reason, instead of the world.

At least, for now, he had the power to fix it. You were the love of his life, and he had never felt so gratified to be in anyone else's presence.

Peter's fingers traced light, small circles on your back. He could hear your heartbeat slow. The softness of your finger against his was enough to help him close his eyes.

He was at peace, real peace for the first time in weeks.

"We need to remind ourselves to talk about shit more." You mumbled sleepy, almost inaudible. "So this doesn't happen again, because I hate it."

"Me too, babe." He whispered, content with watching you rise and fall in sync with his breathing.

"I couldn't bear to lose you."

#tom holland x reader #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker imagine #peter parker

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