#i don’t think we’ll ever get this again

[fr0stf4ll]

A court of Shadows and Moonlight - Part 13

paring; Azriel x reader

summary; In the wake of looming war and changing traditions, a gifted healer returns to the Night Court after centuries of wandering the continents. Tasked with stepping into Madja’s legendary role, she must guide reluctant healers, soothe wounded warriors, and face the entrenched prejudice of Illyrian leaders. But as she mends torn wings and broken spirits, an unexpected bond awakens between her and the Night Court’s enigmatic Spymaster. With rivalries simmering and a dangerous threat looming on the horizon, she must reconcile duty and desire, learning that true healing can extend beyond flesh and bone—if she dares to embrace the light hidden among the shadows.

word count ; 10k

Trigger warning; violence & mention of death

notes; hello lovely people, here is the new chapter ! A bit longer than usual but let me tell you that this one is heavy (and I did cut some of it to put it in the next chapter because I was a bit scared that it would be too much for one chapter). Anyways I tried to do a fun chapter, well ... you guys will see with your own eyes that I always need to make things a bit dramatic (only a little °°333). I think it's really the chapter I enjoyed the most writing so far so I hope that you will enjoy reading it <3. See you all next week, love you <333

thank you again @ailoda for you post it made me freaking emotional <333

previous ✧

The warm glow of the living room lights filled the townhouse, casting a cozy ambiance over the gathered Inner Circle. It was dinner day, and the entire group—Feyre, Rhysand, Cassian, Azriel, Amren, Nesta and Mor—had joined you for an evening of food and conversation. It had been a few days since you went back home after the incident and  Feyre had personally come to you that afternoon to invite you, her warm insistence leaving little room to decline. You were drowing in your work trying not to give a thought to the bond and the fact that you hadn’t seen Azriel since. 

You’d opted for a simple yet comfortable outfit: wide, high-waisted black pants paired with a loose, long-sleeved blue top with a high collar. The fabric was soft and warm, perfect for the cool night air.

The room was alive with chatter and laughter, and you found yourself caught up in it, smiling despite the exhaustion still lingering in your body. Cassian and Mor were on either side of you, bantering animatedly about Velaris nightlife.

“You mean to tell me you’ve never been to Rita's?” Cassian exclaimed, his eyes widening in mock horror.

“I think once when I was younger, but ever since never.” you replied, shrugging. “I’m too busy saving lives to hit up bars, apparently.”

“It’s not just a bar,” Mor interjected, her hands gesturing wildly as if to emphasize her point. “It’s the bar. Best drinks, best music, best people—it’s a Velaris institution.”

Cassian leaned forward, grinning. “Mor’s right. Even Amren’s been there. It’s practically a rite of passage.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” you said, smirking.

Mor wasn’t satisfied. She nudged your shoulder, her voice taking on a pleading tone. “Come on. We’ll go together when you’re better.”

You chuckled. “Alright, but I don’t know when I’ll have time.”

“When?” she pressed, her hazel eyes narrowing suspiciously.

“Next month, probably,” you answered, trying not to laugh at the look of disbelief on her face.

“Next month?” she repeated, incredulous. “Why next month?”

“Because next week, I’m going back to Windhaven,” you began, ticking the events off on your fingers. “Then I’ve got meetings with the priestesses, and then Starfall is coming, and after that—”

“Okay, okay!” Mor interrupted, throwing her hands up in mock surrender. “I’m going to have to kidnap you just to get you out for one night.”

You laughed openly this time, shaking your head. “Fine, I’ll pencil you in when I can.”

Feyre approached then, her soft voice cutting through the lively banter. “Y/N, do you think you could join me for a painting class on Friday afternoon? And don’t you dare tell me you’re too busy with work.”

You raised a hand, pretending to look wounded. “I wasn’t going to say that. But I can’t make it—not because of work, though.”

Feyre raised an eyebrow, clearly curious. “Then why?”

“It’s my weekly tea time with Madja,” you replied simply.

Cassian immediately perked up, his brows shooting up in interest. “Tea time with Madja?” he repeated, leaning forward with an amused grin. “That’s adorable. What do you two even talk about? Healer issues? New techniques?”

You swatted his arm lightly, shaking your head. “Hey! Just because I love my job doesn’t mean that’s all I talk about. We talk about... other things.”

“Like what?” Mor asked, smirking as she sipped her wine.

You tilted your head, feigning mystery. “That’s between me and Madja.”

Cassian let out a bark of laughter. “I’m picturing the two of you having a serious debate over tea about how to fix my dumbass when I inevitably crash into something.”

“Cassian,” Feyre interjected, rolling her eyes, “Y/N does far more important work than managing your antics.”

“Thank you,” you said to Feyre, giving Cassian a pointed look. “And for the record, Madja and I have very enlightening conversations. You’d be surprised how insightful she is about life in general.”

The group shared a laugh, and for the first time in what felt like ages, you let yourself relax. The lively chatter continued, shifting topics seamlessly as plates of food and glasses of wine were passed around. For once, you weren’t talking about healers’ matters or politics—you were just a part of the group, laughing and enjoying the moment. 

The peaceful hum of the room shifted the moment Elain entered, Lucien trailing just behind her. You were talking to Feyre and didn’t immediately notice the change in atmosphere until Rhysand’s voice broke through the casual chatter.

“Y/N,” Rhys said smoothly, gesturing toward the two newcomers, “allow me to introduce Lucien.”

You looked up, your eyes meeting Lucien’s in a moment of mutual surprise. “What are you doing here?” you blurted out before you could stop yourself. The corners of Lucien’s mouth twitched into a small, amused smile, and he stepped forward to give you a brief hug.

“Good to see you too, Y/N,” he replied lightly, though his voice carried an undercurrent of genuine warmth.

The room’s dynamic shifted again as Elain gravitated toward Azriel, who was leaning against the back of the couch. Lucien, perhaps instinctively or perhaps by choice, found his way to your side. The juxtaposition didn’t go unnoticed, though no one commented on it—at least not aloud.

You handed Nyx back to Feyre, who smiled gently at you, her expression tinged with curiosity as she glanced between you and Lucien.

“I take it you’ve met before?” Rhys prompted, his brow lifting slightly.

You nodded, still a little thrown by Lucien’s sudden presence. “Yes, we breafly met when I was in Autumn centuries ago.” you explained. “And then again in Spring—he arrived a few weeks before I left.”

“Small world,” Lucien said with a faint grin, though his sharp gaze flickered to Rhysand, ever aware of the High Lord’s looming presence.

The conversation meandered for a while, touching on casual topics. But then Lucien turned to you, his tone shifting slightly and quietly asked you. “I heard about the healer meeting in Dawn. Did you have a chance to speak with the head healer of Autumn?”

Your expression softened, though a shadow passed over your features. “I did,” you said, your voice quieter. “She’s doing better, don’t worry. But, very honestly, Lucien... she won’t be in her best shape if she stays in Autumn. It’s slowly killing her.”

The room stilled, the weight of your words settling heavily in the air. Rhysand’s eyebrow arched, and you felt an unfamiliar sensation—a gentle yet deliberate tug on your mind. It was the first time Rhys had ever used his abilities on you like this, and though it was unsettling, you allowed it, letting him in.

What was that about? his voice sounded in your mind, calm but edged with concern.

The High Lady of Autumn tried to kill herself, you replied, the words laced with quiet gravity. 

The thought landed heavily in Rhysand’s consciousness, and though his face betrayed nothing, you felt the ripple of shock that coursed through him.

Shit, he muttered in your mind, his tone uncharacteristically unsettled. Does Eris know?

Yes, you replied. He’s keeping it quiet, but it’s caused even more division within Autumn. The tension between him and Beron is... palpable.

Rhysand’s silence spoke volumes as he processed the information. You could feel his thoughts flickering through the implications, his strategic mind already piecing together the broader picture.

And what do you think? he finally asked, his tone quieter now.

I think she needs to leave Autumn. Rordan their head healer told me that Day might be an option. But it’s her decision to make, not ours.

Rhysand’s agreement hummed softly through your connection. Keep me updated on her situation—and anything else from Autumn.

You nodded slightly, breaking the mental link as Lucien’s voice drew your attention back to the room. “And do you think she’ll leave?” he asked, his expression unreadable.

You shook your head, offering him a faint, tired smile. “I don’t know. I hope so. But it’s her choice.”

Lucien sighed, his posture stiffening slightly. “It’s complicated,” he murmured, his tone heavy with unspoken thoughts.

“Yes,” you agreed softly. “It is.”

Though the conversation shifted to lighter topics, the weight of what had been discussed lingered in your mind—and Rhysand’s—as an unspoken reminder of the cracks forming in Prythian’s foundation.

You turned to Lucien with a mischievous glint in your eyes. “Oh, by the way, Lila says hi.”

Lucien froze mid-sip of his drink, his eyes widening in a mix of panic and exasperation. “No. Not her again,” he muttered, setting his glass down with more force than necessary. “Why does she still talk about me?”

You burst out laughing at his visible distress, the kind of laughter that left you breathless. The others turned their attention to you, curiosity lighting up their faces. Cassian raised a brow, leaning forward. “What’s so funny?”

You wiped at your eyes, still giggling. “Oh, it’s just... let’s say that during the healer meeting at least the nights we spent talking with the girls, Lucien was a very… popular topic. Let’s just say Lila is quite taken with Lucien.”

“Taken?” Lucien interjected sharply, lifting his head to glare at you. “No, Y/N. Let’s call it what it is—obsessed. I am terrified of her.”

Rhysand, clearly amused, leaned back in his chair with a chuckle. “What does she look like?”

You smirked, ready for the volley of descriptions. “Well, she looks like Tamlin—”

“But with boobs,” Lucien interjected, deadpan, cutting you off.

“And she’s short, like Amren,” you added, grinning as you gestured downward.

Lucien groaned again. “Short, running everywhere, and screaming.  Always screaming.”

You burst into laughter again, shaking your head. “Don’t get me wrong—she’s an incredible healer. Honestly, one of my best students. But... she’s something, that’s for sure.”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Lucien muttered, rubbing his temples. “Do you know about the closet incident?”

“Oh gods, yes!” You exclaimed, grinning wide. “That was hilarious when she told us about it. The way we had to make her drink for her to be able to admit it, but don’t dramatise everything Lucien it was just her way to show her affection right?” you looked at him amused.

“She tried to lock me in a closet to stop me from leaving the Spring Court Y/N?” 

"Well that sounds oddly familiar?” said Feyre looking at the booth of you. 

Cassian’s laugh echoed through the room. “What is it with Spring Court and locking people ? First Tamlin, now this?”

You nodded, struggling to suppress your laughter. “Apparently, she thought it was the only way to get him to ‘listen.’”

You wiped tears of laughter from your eyes. 

Rhysand leaned back, still chuckling. “So, to sum it up: she’s like Tamlin, but with boobs, short like Amren, runs everywhere, and... locks people in closets.”

Cassian doubled over with laughter. “You’ve got to introduce me to this Lila. She sounds like a riot.”

Lucien glared at him. “You can take my place if you’re so curious, I’m sure she would love you.”

The room burst into laughter again, the lighthearted banter a welcome reprieve from the tensions that had been looming. Even Lucien couldn’t help but laugh, though his mortified expression lingered.

On the other side of the room, Azriel leaned against the couch, his shadows curling restlessly around him like dark, living whispers. His gaze lingered on you and Lucien, watching the way you laughed with an ease that felt almost foreign to him. You looked carefree, radiant even, as if the weight of the world had momentarily lifted from your shoulders. Lucien’s animated gestures and your bright laughter filled the air, a stark contrast to the tight knot of unease growing in Azriel’s chest.

He shouldn’t feel this way. He couldn’t feel this way.

Azriel shifted slightly, trying to quiet the tumult within him. Elain was seated beside him, her delicate fingers brushing against his thigh in a silent question. He turned to her, her soft gaze meeting his, and he forced a small nod. “I’m fine,” he murmured, though the words tasted like a lie on his tongue.

But he wasn’t fine. Not even close.

He had wanted to cross the room, to come and sit beside you, to feel that inexplicable comfort that always seemed to radiate from you when you were near. Now that he knew about the bond, everything felt more tangled, more painful. The knowledge weighed heavily on him, suffocating in its clarity. How could you sit there, so normal, so composed, when you had known about this bond for longer than he had?

The thought ate away at him. How had you managed to keep it hidden? How had you endured the ache of it, the pull, without letting it show?

Azriel’s gaze flicked to Elain briefly, guilt tugging at the edges of his thoughts. He shifted subtly away from her, a small, almost imperceptible movement. Out of respect for Lucien, yes. Not that he’d cared before—but now, now he understood. He understood the quiet agony of seeing someone he cared about so deeply sitting with another. It twisted his insides in a way he hadn’t expected.

But it wasn’t just about respect. It was about you.

His shadows coiled tighter around him, reflecting the storm in his mind. He didn’t know what to do, didn’t know how to untangle the mess of emotions that had overtaken him since discovering the bond. And the hardest part was the longing—to be near you, to hear your voice, to feel that connection that had only deepened with the knowledge of what you truly were to him.

You were laughing again, the sound clear and unguarded. It was a sound he hadn’t realized he craved until now, and it only added to his torment. The way you leaned slightly toward Lucien, your smile bright, as if there was no weight of a bond tethering you to him. As if he didn’t even exist.

Azriel’s jaw tightened, his wings shifting slightly as he glanced at the floor. He needed a moment, a reprieve from the chaos in his chest. From the knowledge that while you laughed with Lucien, he was the one standing in the shadows, lost and unsure.

You had barely met Azriel’s gaze when Lucien raised an eyebrow at you, the corner of his mouth twitching with amusement. “Right, let’s not talk about the Spring Court, Y/N,” he said, his tone almost teasing.

“How much time did the two of you spend in the Spring Court together?” Feyre asked, her curiosity piqued.

Without missing a beat, you and Lucien answered in unison, “Three weeks.”

The synchronization caught everyone off guard, and a ripple of laughter swept through the room.

You rolled your eyes dramatically and added, “And that was far enough, if you want my opinion.”

Lucien smirked, leaning back in his chair. “Yes, far enough after nearly killing Tamlin, burning part of his estate, and getting proposed to by his last general.”

The room fell silent, and all eyes turned to you. You stared at Lucien in disbelief, your mouth opening and closing for a moment before crossing your legs and taking a deliberate sip of your wine. “That’s so fake,” you said finally, your tone nonchalant. “I didn’t light the fire. I was just there when it happened.”

Rhysand raised an eyebrow, his smirk growing as he leaned forward slightly. “And tell me, Y/N, just how many people have proposed to you?”

You nearly choked on your wine. “What do you mean, Rhysand? Please.”

He raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying himself. Everyone’s attention shifted to you, eyes wide with intrigue. You glanced at Azriel, who had been uncharacteristically quiet, and asked accusingly, “Did you tell him?”

Azriel shook his head immediately, his voice steady. “No, of course not.”

Cassian and Mor, ever the instigators, leaned closer. “Wait, wait,” Cassian said, grinning. “Who else proposed to her? Go on, Rhys. I feel like this is going to be good.”

Rhysand’s smirk widened, his violet eyes gleaming with mischief. “Well,” he began, drawing the word out dramatically, “our sweet head healer of the Night Court could have become the Lady of Dawn, if she had wanted to.”

The reaction was immediate. Mor screamed, her voice full of scandalized delight. “You were with Thesan? Y/N!”

You groaned, covering your face with your hands. “Yes,” you admitted reluctantly, “and that’s all you’re going to get to know. End of discussion.” You shot Rhysand a black look, though he only laughed, clearly pleased with himself.

“Well,” you said quickly, trying to change the subject, “it’s not to interrupt, but I’m pretty sure dinner is ready, right?”

Feyre crossed her arms, a knowing look on her face. “If you think you’re going to escape this conversation, Y/N, you’re wrong.”

You sighed dramatically, looking up as if to appeal to the Mother above. “Oh, for the love of the mother,” you muttered, but the room erupted into laughter, the tension giving way to warmth and camaraderie once more.

During dinner, to everyone’s surprise, you found yourself seated next to Azriel. He had deliberately taken the seat beside you, leaving Lucien to sit next to Elain. The shift in seating arrangements caught more than a few curious glances. Elain’s worried look flickered toward Azriel, while Lucien, seated on her other side, raised an eyebrow at the change.

You tried to ignore the questions bubbling in your mind, though it was hard to brush aside the unexpected energy between you and Azriel. While you had resigned yourself to the fact that Azriel cared deeply for Elain, perhaps even loved her, this sudden change left you puzzled.

Amren’s sharp voice cut through the quiet hum of conversation, drawing everyone’s attention. “Is this a new table, Rhysand?” she asked, gesturing to the elegant woodwork beneath her plate.

Rhysand smirked, barely looking up from his plate. “Yes, it is. Y/N and Azriel broke the last one.”

You choked on your wine, coughing violently as heat crept up your neck. The room went silent for a heartbeat before Cassian burst out laughing, followed closely by Mor’s cackling. You covered your mouth, trying to recover as all eyes turned to you.

Amren’s silver eyes sparkled with amusement as she leaned forward slightly. “Well, girl, a High Lord, a General, and now a Spymaster. You’re going for all of them, aren’t you?”

Your jaw dropped as laughter erupted around the table. “Oh, please shut up,” you groaned, burying your face in your hands. You didn’t even dare to glance at Azriel, though you could feel the heat of his gaze lingering. The sharpness of Elain’s eyes, however, was impossible to miss. Her displeasure radiated from her in waves, her expression tightening as she glanced between you and Azriel.

“I’d like to point out,” Cassian added with a grin, “that I wasn’t the one who broke a table for once.”

“That’s not something to be proud of, Cassian,” Nesta muttered beside him, though a faint smirk tugged at her lips.

The table settled back into a hum of conversation, though you couldn’t shake the tension that simmered beneath the surface. Every now and then, you caught Azriel glancing your way, his expression unreadable. And while you tried to keep your focus on the food in front of you, you couldn’t help but feel that this dinner was only the beginning of something far more complicated.

The flow of the dinner had been pleasant enough, though Azriel sitting beside you brought an odd energy you couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t uncomfortable, not entirely—but it was different. When it was just the two of you—working, talking, sharing quieter moments—it felt natural, even easy. But tonight, the dynamic felt... forced. Questions swirled in your mind: Did he sit next to you to make her jealous? Why let her mate sit next to her, then? You brushed the thoughts aside, trying to focus on the lively conversations around you.

Dessert was served, and you were half-listening to Feyre and Nesta talk about some shared anecdote when Elain stood abruptly, excusing herself. The movement caught your attention. Lucien’s worried gaze followed her, and when you glanced at Azriel, you noticed the same concern etched into his features. That expression.

The unease it stirred in you was compounded when Elain began moving around the table. Her steps faltered slightly, her balance uneven. You frowned, your healer’s instincts kicking in.

“Elain?” Feyre’s voice held a note of alarm as her sister stumbled closer to where you were seated.

You turned in your chair just in time to see Elain falter entirely. Without thinking, you shot up and caught her as she collapsed, her weight sudden but manageable in your arms. Her head lolled against your shoulder, and a collective gasp rippled through the room. All conversation ceased.

“Elain!” Feyre and Nesta rushed to her side, their faces pale with worry. Lucien moved swiftly to her other side, his hand hovering uncertainly as if unsure whether to touch her. Azriel was right behind him, his shadows curling protectively around him, his expression a mix of alarm and dread.

“Elain, can you hear me?” Feyre’s voice was tight with fear as she knelt beside her sister.

And then it happened. Elain’s eyes snapped open, but they were no longer the soft brown you were accustomed to. They were white—bright, glowing, and unseeing. The sight knocked the breath from your lungs, your grip tightening reflexively as the unnatural glow emanated from her.

“Elain,” Nesta whispered, her voice breaking as she grasped her sister’s hand.

“What’s happening to her?” Lucien demanded, his tone panicked.

You steadied Elain in your arms, trying to process what was happening. Your mind raced as you scanned her for any immediate signs of injury or distress. There was none—nothing physical, at least—but the way her body trembled, her unfocused eyes, sent chills down your spine.

“She’s having a vision,” Azriel said, his voice low and tight. 

Feyre nodded grimly at your question about Elain’s visions. “Yes,” she said, her voice tight. “But... she’s never reacted like this before.”

Elain’s body began trembling more violently, her breathing escalating into rapid, shallow gasps. You quickly moved, lowering her to the ground into a safer position, your movements precise and practiced. “Everyone step back,” you said firmly, your voice cutting through the panic in the room. “Give me space.”

The others obeyed, though their worry was palpable. Feyre knelt near but didn’t interfere, her face pale with fear. Lucien and Azriel hovered nearby, their expressions equally stricken. Nesta stood frozen, her hands clenched into fists.

Elain’s trembling worsened, transitioning into full-body spasms. You glanced sharply at Feyre. “Does she usually react like this?”

Feyre shook her head quickly. “No—this has never happened before.”

Your jaw tightened as you assessed her condition. “Alright,” you murmured, more to yourself than anyone else. With a swift motion, you opened Elain’s mouth and carefully inserted two fingers to hold her tongue down, ensuring she wouldn’t swallow it during the convulsions. Then, your free hand hovered just above her head.

You closed your eyes, focusing your power as it began to flow from you. A faint glow radiated from your hand, and your hair lifted as if caught in an unseen breeze. A hush fell over the room, everyone holding their breath as the air grew heavy under the weight of your power. Azriel’s sharp gaze was fixed on you, his shadows coiling around him in tension.

Elain’s spasms began to subside as your power guided her, pulling her gently from the grip of the vision. The glow from your hand intensified briefly before dimming, and her breathing evened out. Slowly, her body stilled.

Elain’s spasms began to subside as your power guided her, pulling her gently from the grip of the vision. The glow from your hand intensified briefly before dimming, and her breathing evened out. Slowly, her body stilled. But as the connection between you and her held firm, something shifted—a thread of her vision snagged onto your mind.

It happened so quickly that you didn’t have time to prepare. One moment you were guiding her back to reality, and the next, you were pulled into the recesses of her mind. Shadows enveloped you, thick and suffocating, until the world reshaped itself into the fragments of her vision.

The ground beneath you was barren, cracked, and lifeless. The air smelled of ash and decay, and the sky above was a swirling void of darkness. There were no stars, no moon—only an oppressive, smothering emptiness. Fires burned in the distance, their flickering light revealing the skeletal remains of a once-thriving land. This place had been wiped clean of life, erased by a force too terrible to comprehend.

You turned, searching for Elain in the chaos. And then you saw her. She stood just ahead, motionless, her expression vacant and unseeing as if she were a mere observer in this apocalyptic scene. You tried to call out to her, to reach her, but your voice was swallowed by the void. She didn’t seem to register your presence, her eyes fixed on the horror unfolding around her.

Your chest tightened, and you were about to take a step toward her when something else caught your attention. Movement in the periphery—a figure in the shadows. It was... you.

At first, you thought it might be a trick of the vision, a warped reflection, but the figure stepped into the light, and there was no mistaking it. It was you, yet not. This version of you was eerily calm, detached. You looked the same, but your expression held an unsettling stillness.

Then the change began. Blood trickled from your nose, then your ears, your eyes, and your mouth. The crimson streaks contrasted sharply against your pale skin, but you didn’t flinch or react. Instead, a faint smile curved your lips, haunting in its serenity.

Elain, still oblivious to your presence, stood frozen, her hand lifting to her mouth in silent horror as she watched the scene unfold.

And then, the darkness took shape. A hand, inky and unnatural, emerged from the shadows, its long, clawed fingers reaching toward the chest of the vision-you. The smile on your face remained as the hand struck in one swift motion, plunging into where your heart should have been.

You felt it. The phantom pain. The void. The absence.

You crumpled to the ground, lifeless, and the darkness seeped into the cracks of the earth, spreading like a disease. Elain whimpered softly in the vision, her form trembling as she stared at your fallen figure. 

The pull of the vision began to loosen, dragging you back to the present. You blinked, gasping for breath as you returned to your body, the sensation of your heart still pounding in your chest grounding you. Elain stirred beneath you, her breathing shaky as her eyes fluttered open.

Your mind reeled, the memory of what you had seen burning fresh in your mind. You didn’t know what the vision meant, but the chilling image of yourself—bleeding, smiling, heartless—was not something you would soon forget.

You exhaled, opening your eyes to see Elain staring up at you. Relief flickered in the room—until, without warning, her hand lashed out and slapped you hard across the face.

The shock reverberated through the room as everyone froze. You blinked, stunned by the sharp sting on your cheek. Slowly, you stood up, gripping the back of the chair nearest to you as if to steady yourself, your knuckles tightening against the wood. But your face remained calm, your expression carefully composed.

“Well,” you said dryly, your voice steady despite the racing of your heart, “that’s a new one.”

Feyre and Nesta immediately moved to Elain’s side, helping her sit up as she began to regain full awareness. “Elain, are you okay?” Feyre asked, her voice soft but worried.

Lucien stepped forward, his golden eye flashing with unease. “What happened? Why did she—”

“I don’t think she knew what she was doing,” you interrupted, your tone calm and measured, giving nothing away. You flexed your fingers subtly against the chair, grounding yourself as you continued. “It’s normal for someone to act unpredictably when coming out of a vision that strong.”

Feyre and Nesta gently guided Elain toward the stairs, murmuring reassurances as they helped her to her room. Lucien followed close behind, his expression tight with worry. Azriel, however, didn’t move. His gaze remained locked on you, golden eyes scanning your face with quiet intensity.

Slowly, you let go of the chair, shaking out the tension in your fingers. Your cheek still stung faintly, but it was nothing compared to the weight pressing heavily against your chest.

You sighed softly, glancing at the mess of plates and half-eaten desserts left on the table. It felt like the room itself had absorbed the tension of the evening, the air heavy and stifling.

Mother above, what a night. You straightened, smoothing down your sleeves as you regained your composure. 

Azriel crossed the room in a few swift strides, his shadows curling low around his feet. His hand lifted slowly, hesitating for the briefest of moments before his fingers brushed against your arm—light as a whisper but enough to make your breath catch.

“Are you okay?” His voice was low, almost a murmur, his thumb grazing your sleeve in a subtle, grounding motion.

You blinked, surprised by the question, by the weight in his tone. “I’m—” Your words faltered, the concern in his eyes throwing you off balance. “I’m fine.”

Cassian, ever the mood breaker, smirked. “Great catch, Y/N,” he said with a chuckle.

Azriel’s head turned slightly, casting Cassian a sharp side-eye that practically dripped with unspoken warning. His shadows flared briefly, wrapping tighter around his boots. Cassian raised a brow, but wisely said nothing more.

You tried to smile at Cassian, though it barely reached your eyes. “Thanks, Cassian” you said softly.

Azriel’s fingers tightened briefly on your arm before releasing you. His touch lingered like a ghost, the warmth of it seeping into your skin. His golden gaze remained locked on yours, searching, as though trying to read something written just beneath the surface.

“I’m fine,” you repeated, softer this time, more for him than for anyone else.

He studied you for a second longer, his shadows curling and unfurling around him. His thumb brushed the back of your hand in a fleeting gesture that felt more like a promise than a reassurance.

“Good,” he said quietly, his voice steady but thick with something you couldn’t quite place. “Let me know if… you need anything.”

For a moment, it felt like you were the only two people in the room, the air between you charged and warm. Then Azriel stepped back, his eyes lingering on you for a heartbeat longer before turning toward the others.

You turned to Rhysand, your voice calm but serious. “How do her visions usually go?”

Rhysand leaned against the edge of the table, his brow furrowed. “Not like that,” he admitted. “She usually comes back to herself without shaking or... whatever that was tonight.”

You nodded, thoughtful. “You’ll need to monitor her closely if this keeps happening. What happened tonight—especially the shaking—is essentially her brain short-circuiting, going on and off repeatedly. I stuck my fingers in her mouth not for pleasure but to prevent her from swallowing her tongue.”

Cassian let out a startled laugh at your bluntness, but you continued without pause. “I helped her out of the vision, but it could be the content of this particular one was too violent, causing her to react that way.”

Lucien, standing stiffly in the doorway, finally spoke. “And if it’s not controlled next time? What happens then?”

You met his gaze evenly, your tone steady but grave. “Asking me that is like asking what would happen if you put a soldier in a war field. There are options, but death is one of them. She could stay in the shaking state without being able to come back to herself or choke—but those are worst-case scenarios.”

The room was quiet as you continued, your voice calm but firm. “It could also completely be a one-time thing. But this is why it has to be monitored carefully.”

Amren leaned back in her chair, her sharp eyes on you. “Well, at least that was clear.”

You smirked faintly at her dry remark. “Clarity is what I aim for.”

Azriel’s eyes lingered on you, his shadows curling faintly around his shoulders as he listened intently.

“I could examine her further,” you added after a moment, “to see if there’s anything else that might explain what happened tonight. But I’d wait until she’s less shaken by it all. Right now, forcing her into anything might make things worse.”

Rhysand nodded, his expression thoughtful. “We’ll keep an eye on her and call for you if it happens again. For now, let’s give her some space to recover.”

Everyone seemed to agree with that plan, though Lucien still looked troubled. The room slowly eased out of its earlier tension, though the weight of what had just occurred lingered in the back of everyone’s minds.

Azriel’s gaze lingered on you, his golden eyes dark with worry. As the room shifted its attention to Feyre and Nesta returning, he leaned closer, his hand brushing lightly against your arm. The touch sent a ripple of awareness through you.

“Are you sure you are okay?” His voice was low, barely audible over the quiet murmurs of the others.

You blinked, caught off guard by the genuine concern in his tone. Was Azriel truly worried about you?

A soft smile tugged at your lips, and you shook your head lightly. “Don’t worry. A little slap isn’t going to kill me,” you said, throwing in a wink to lighten the mood.

Azriel’s lips quirked ever so slightly, but the tension in his shoulders didn’t ease entirely.

Feyre’s voice broke through the moment. “Elain’s sleeping now,” she said, her tone carrying both relief and exhaustion.

Lucien exhaled audibly, a wave of relief washing over his features. Feyre turned to you, her expression warm with gratitude. “Thank you for your help, Y/N. I don’t know what we’d have done without you.”

You nodded, brushing it off lightly. “I’m just glad I was here when it happened.”

Rhysand’s eyes flicked between Feyre and Nesta, his expression sharpening. “Did she tell you anything about her vision?”

The two sisters exchanged a weighted look, Feyre biting her lip before she finally spoke. “Yes,” she said hesitantly, glancing at Nesta for confirmation.

“It’s not good,” Nesta added, her voice steadier but no less grim.

The room fell silent again, everyone waiting for Feyre or Nesta to elaborate. The weight of whatever Elain had seen hung heavy in the air, and you couldn’t help but feel the knot of tension coiling tighter in your chest. Azriel’s hand lingered on your arm for a moment longer before he pulled it away, his expression hardening as he braced for whatever was coming next. 

Feyre exchanged a tense glance with Nesta, the silence thick and suffocating. Then, with a heavy sigh, Feyre began to explain, her voice trembling slightly.

“She told us about what she saw… about death, war, and darkness sweeping over everything. But the most terrifying part was…” Feyre’s voice broke, and she looked at Nesta to continue.

Nesta, ever composed, took over. “She saw you, Y/N. In the middle of it all. And…” She hesitated, her steel facade cracking for just a moment before she forced herself to say it. “She saw you...”

The room fell deathly silent, everyone frozen in place. Azriel, standing beside you, visibly tensed, his golden eyes narrowing as he processed the words.

You straightened, your expression unreadable. The weight of their words wasn’t new to you. You had already seen it yourself in Elain’s vision, and now, hearing it spoken aloud, it only cemented what you had felt.

“I know,” you said quietly, your voice steady but filled with an edge of resignation.

Every head in the room turned to you, confusion and shock flashing across their faces.

“You know?” Feyre asked, her voice almost a whisper.

You nodded slowly. “I saw it too. I’m not sure how, but when I guided Elain out of her vision, pieces of it came to me. I saw what she saw.”

Azriel’s voice cut through the stunned silence, sharp and filled with tension. “Saw what? What exactly did you see?”

You turned to face him, your gaze unwavering, though the effort to maintain your composure was immense. “I saw the moment I die, Azriel.”

The breath seemed to leave the room all at once. Even Amren, ever-unflappable, looked taken aback. Cassian, wide-eyed, shifted uneasily in his seat. Feyre and Nesta exchanged another tense glance, while Rhysand’s expression hardened, his jaw tightening.

“What do you mean, you saw yourself die?” Azriel pressed, his voice low and strained, his shadows coiling around him like a living entity. His hand hovered near your arm again, as though he wanted to hold on to you, to ground himself in your presence.

You gave a bitter smile, the weight of the truth pressing down on you. “Exactly what it sounds like. She saw me die, and so did I. What do you want me to say? It’s not a matter of if, but when.”

Azriel’s jaw tightened, and the raw emotion in his eyes was almost unbearable to look at. “You can’t just… accept that,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, yet filled with an edge of desperation. “There has to be something we can do. We can stop it—”

“You think I haven’t thought of that?” you interrupted, your tone sharp but not unkind. “I’ve lived long enough to know that sometimes, no matter what you do, fate has its way.”

Rhysand’s voice broke through, calm but commanding. “What exactly did you see, Y/N?”

You hesitated, the image flashing in your mind. The darkness, the war, and that final moment when everything stopped, and you fell. “I saw the world in chaos—death everywhere. And then I saw myself... my blood, my heart—gone. I felt it as much as I saw it.”

Azriel took a step closer to you, his shadows curling protectively around him. His golden eyes were locked onto yours, filled with something you couldn’t quite place. “I don’t accept that,” he said firmly. “We’ll find a way to stop it. Whatever it takes.”

For a moment, the room was quiet, everyone digesting the gravity of the revelation. Then Amren, leaning back in her chair, spoke up, her voice cool but filled with an edge of challenge. “If fate has marked you, Y/N, then the question is not if we can stop it, but what it will cost.”

Her words hung heavily in the air, a reminder of the uncertain path ahead. You swallowed hard, the weight of the vision and its implications pressing down on you. But even as the room seemed to drown in its tension, you squared your shoulders, lifting your chin.

“Whatever happens,” you said softly, “it doesn’t change what I need to do now. We have time—maybe not much, but enough to prepare.”

As the heavy silence settled in the room, you could feel the weight of everyone’s gaze on you. Rhysand’s sharp violet eyes held yours for a long moment before he finally spoke, his voice steady but laced with an undertone of unease. “Y/N,” he began, “would you allow me to see it? The vision?”

You hesitated, the thought of someone else witnessing what you had seen unsettling, but you nodded nonetheless. “Go ahead,” you said softly, standing your ground. Rhysand approached you carefully, his movements deliberate, as though he didn’t want to startle you.

His mental touch was gentle, like a soft whisper brushing against your thoughts. You let him in, showing him the fractured, haunting glimpses of the vision—darkness, war, your bloodied form crumbling to the ground.

When he pulled back, his expression was tight, his jaw clenched. A faint twitch betrayed his composed demeanor.

“Don’t pity me, Rhysand,” you said, your tone firm, though there was a flicker of something softer beneath it. “I died once. I’ve been blessed by the Mother, and I’ve accepted that one day, that favor will need to be returned.”

The words hung in the air, heavy and final. Azriel’s golden eyes locked onto you, his shadows coiling tightly around him. His expression was unreadable, but the look in his eyes was anything but. It was a mix of disbelief, worry, and something else you couldn’t quite place—something that made your chest tighten.

The tension in the room shifted, the atmosphere changing as people slowly began to disperse, their expressions ranging from solemn to thoughtful. Conversations were hushed, and one by one, the Inner Circle left to retreat to their rooms or find solace in other parts of the house.

You needed air. The weight of the vision, the discussions, and the gazes filled with unspoken questions were too much. Slipping out quietly, you made your way to the garden of the townhouse. The cool night air brushed against your skin, soothing in its simplicity. The stars above were bright, scattered across the inky sky like a promise of something eternal.

You found a bench near the center of the garden and sank onto it, tilting your head back to take in the view. The stars twinkled softly, distant and untouchable, yet strangely comforting. For a moment, you let yourself breathe, the crisp air filling your lungs as you tried to untangle the storm of emotions swirling inside you.

The quiet of the garden wrapped around you like a comforting blanket. After some time, you felt a presence approach—a familiar one—and moments later, a warmer jacket was draped over your shoulders. You turned your head slightly to see Azriel sitting down beside you, his movements careful and deliberate. He didn’t speak, didn’t try to fill the silence, and instead, he leaned back to look up at the sky, mirroring your own posture.

For a while, the two of you simply sat there, the stars above a quiet audience to the unspoken words lingering between you. Eventually, unable to bear the weight of the silence any longer, you turned to him and asked, “Aren’t you going to ask me what I’m doing here?”

Still gazing upward, Azriel’s voice was low, steady. “Once, someone told me that sometimes no words need to be spoken. But if you want to talk…” Finally, he turned his head to look at you, his golden eyes catching the faint moonlight. “I’m here.”

A small laugh escaped you, soft but genuine. “Are you actually quoting me?” you teased, raising an eyebrow.

Azriel’s lips twitched into the barest hint of a smile. “Maybe.”

Your laughter faded into the cool night air, replaced by a quieter moment as the gravity of everything settled back in. After a moment, Azriel’s voice broke through the stillness, softer this time. “How?”

You turned to him, your brow furrowing slightly. “How what?”

“How can you accept what you saw so easily?” he asked, his gaze dropping to the ground as though the question was too heavy to lift.

You hesitated, unsure how to answer, then sighed. “I don’t know, Azriel. I really don’t.”

He exhaled softly, the sound tinged with frustration, and his voice was almost a whisper when he spoke again. “Don’t behave like your death won’t affect other people.”

Your breath caught at his words, and when you turned to look at him, his hand slowly reached out, his fingers brushing against yours before curling gently around your hand. His touch was warm, grounding.

“Like it won’t affect me,” he added, his voice barely audible now, but the weight of his words settled heavily between you.

Your eyes widened slightly, your heart stumbling over itself as you processed the raw honesty in his voice. You turned your gaze back to the sky, swallowing hard against the lump in your throat. After a long pause, you found the courage to ask, “When did you figure it out?”

Azriel’s grip on your hand tightened just slightly, as though he was anchoring himself to you. “Figure what out?” he asked, his tone cautious, even though you both knew exactly what you meant.

The bond hummed faintly between you, a quiet rhythm you’d learned to live with but had never fully embraced. You turned back to him, meeting his gaze directly, and whispered, “That I’m your mate.”

The moment stretched between you, heavy with emotions you had never allowed yourself to fully feel. Azriel's words hung in the air like an unanswered prayer, and when he finally spoke again, his voice was soft but resolute.

"The moment we nearly died on our way back from Dawn," he said, his gaze unwavering.

“Oh,” was all you could manage, your voice barely above a whisper. After a pause, he tilted his head slightly and asked, “And you? When did you know?”

Your throat tightened as you glanced away, searching for the courage to speak the truth. “When I saved your life at the House of Wind,” you admitted softly.

He was quiet for a moment, his golden eyes fixed on you. “Oh,” was his only response.

And then the question you had been dreading fell from his lips. “Why? Why haven’t you said anything?”

You turned sharply, your face a mask of incredulity. “Are you seriously asking me this now, Azriel? Look at you—with Elain.” Your voice broke slightly, but you steadied yourself. “I barely knew you at the time. What would you have wanted from me then? You loved her—or at least you thought you did. What would you have done if you were in my place?”

“I don’t love her,” he said firmly, cutting through your spiraling thoughts.

You shot him a sidelong glance, disbelief clouding your features. “Azriel, this—this is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you. I don’t want this to be forced.” You took a shaky breath, your voice trembling. “You deserve someone better, much better than me. And definitely not someone who’s... who’s destined to die soon.”

He tried to interrupt, his expression pained, but you raised a hand to stop him. “No, please. You’re one of the kindest, most selfless people I’ve ever met. You’ve dedicated your life to protecting others, to doing what’s right. And I—I just can’t, Azriel. I can’t give you what you deserve.”

You turned fully to him now, your eyes shimmering with unshed tears. The heaviness in your chest felt unbearable, as if the weight of your fears and regrets were finally demanding release. “I work with death every day,” you began, your voice trembling but growing stronger with each word. “Every single day, I watch it take and take and take. I’ve seen families shattered into pieces—mothers begging me to save their children, lovers screaming for someone to bring their person back.”

Azriel’s gaze softened as he took in the storm of emotions pouring from you, his golden eyes following every movement as you began to pace. “I’ve had fathers collapse in my arms because I couldn’t save their wives. Sisters sobbing, clutching me like I was the only thing keeping them tethered to this world. And I...” You paused, pressing a trembling hand to your chest, the lump in your throat growing unbearable. “I can’t—I won’t—be the reason someone else ends up in that position because of me.”

The words tumbled from you, raw and unfiltered, as though they’d been waiting for this moment to escape. “Do you know what that’s like? To carry that? Every mistake, every failure—it haunts you. It lives inside you. And knowing that one day, I’ll be the one taken... that I could leave someone behind, someone I care about... I can’t do that to anyone, Azriel. I just can’t.”

Your steps faltered as the rawness of your confession left you breathless, your arms wrapped tightly around yourself as if you could hold yourself together through sheer will. Azriel remained silent, his eyes following you with an intensity that made your skin prickle. His shadows stirred softly at his feet, as though they wanted to reach out to you but were unsure how.

“Why do you think I’ve always left?” you demanded, turning toward him suddenly, your voice rising. “Why do you think I’ve never stayed anywhere for long? Why do you think I’ve never let anyone get close, too close to me? Why do you think I’ve never been able to have something... someone real?”

Your voice cracked on the last word, and you could feel yourself unraveling. “I’m terrified, Azriel. I’m terrified of death—of what it takes, of what it leaves behind. It’s not just the pain or the loss... it’s the emptiness it leaves in its wake. And I can’t bear the thought of someone else feeling that emptiness because of me.”

Snow began to fall softly around you, the first flakes catching in your hair and melting against your flushed cheeks. You barely noticed, your heart hammering in your chest as the emotions you’d kept buried for so long spilled out in a torrent. The cold air stung your lungs, but you welcomed it, letting it ground you.

Your knees buckled, and you sank to the ground as though the weight of your confession had finally crushed you. The snow gathered in the folds of your clothes, a stark contrast to the heat burning behind your eyes. “And I’m just so, so sorry that I’m your mate,” you choked out, your voice cracking as tears spilled freely down your face.

Azriel knelt beside you without hesitation, his movements slow and deliberate as though he were approaching something fragile. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you into the warmth and steadiness of his chest as your sobs wracked your body. You clung to him, the snowfall around you a quiet witness to the storm raging inside you.

“I’m so sorry, Azriel,” you whispered again, your voice muffled against his shoulder. “I’m sorry I’m your mate. I’m sorry I can’t be what you deserve. I’m sorry for... for all of it.”

His arms tightened around you, his shadows curling protectively, almost soothingly. His voice was low and soft when he finally spoke, the words barely audible over the sound of your own broken breathing. “Don’t you dare apologize for being you,” he murmured, his tone steady, even as his own emotions threatened to break through.

The snow continued to fall, blanketing the garden in a quiet stillness that seemed to echo the rawness of the moment. Azriel’s warmth surrounded you, his presence grounding you even as the storm inside you raged on.

Azriel froze for a moment, his golden eyes locking onto yours, filled with something you couldn’t quite name—something that made your chest tighten. Slowly, almost reverently, his hands rose to gently cup your face, his calloused thumbs brushing away the tears streaking your cheeks. The tenderness in his touch made your breath catch, your heart thundering in your chest.

He tilted your head up, his shadows curling softly around your shoulders, as though they were trying to reassure you in their own way. “Look at me,” he murmured, his voice steady but laced with raw emotion. The words were both a command and a plea, grounding you in the storm of your thoughts. “Just... look at me.”

For a heartbeat, everything else fell away—the snow, the cold, the pain. It was just him, his golden eyes burning with an intensity that made your knees tremble even though you were already on the ground.

And then, without warning, his lips were on yours.

It wasn’t just a kiss; it was a lifeline. Gentle at first, as if he were afraid you’d shatter under his touch, but then deeper, insistent, grounding. A warmth spread through you, chasing away the chill of the snow, as if his very being was pulling you back from the edge. Your eyes widened in shock, your mind struggling to process what was happening. But then, as the bond between you pulsed like a drumbeat in your veins, you melted into him, your hands clutching at the fabric of his tunic as if letting go would undo you completely.

The bond roared to life, the connection between you blazing with an intensity that stole your breath. You felt it in every fiber of your being—a tether that had always been there, humming quietly in the background, now surging forward with undeniable force. His shadows wrapped around you, cocooning you in their embrace, a silent promise of safety and devotion.

The kiss broke, leaving both of you gasping for air, your foreheads pressed together. His hands didn’t leave your face, his thumbs still brushing against your skin, as though anchoring you to the moment. The bond pulsed between you, vibrant and alive, and you swore you could feel his heartbeat echoing in time with yours.

Azriel’s voice, when he finally spoke, was a low murmur, trembling with a quiet intensity that sent shivers down your spine. “Are you done?” he asked, his lips quirking into a faint, almost teasing smile. “Because it’s my turn to talk now.”

His words hung in the air between you, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you felt something other than fear—hope.

Azriel’s gaze pierced through you, deep and unwavering, as though he was stripping away every wall you had ever built, leaving you bare before him. The snow continued to fall around you, cold and relentless, yet you barely noticed it. The world seemed to shrink to just the two of you, kneeling in the snow, your breaths mingling in the frosty air.

“Y/N,” Azriel began, his voice low but filled with a vulnerability you’d never heard from him before. “You are the person who’s made me see the world differently.” He paused, his throat bobbing as he swallowed hard. “The first moment I laid eyes on you, I felt... something. It was like I was drawn to you, like there was this force pulling me toward you, even though I didn’t understand it.”

His words were heavy, laden with emotion. You couldn’t look away, caught in the raw honesty of his confession.

“It took me months to figure out why,” he continued, his shadows curling faintly around him as though reflecting his inner turmoil. “Why I felt like I could tell you things I’ve never even told my brothers. Why, when I was with you, I didn’t feel like I had to hide the parts of me I’ve spent centuries locking away. It was as if you could see me—truly see me—and not turn away.”

Your heart ached at his words, your chest tightening with the weight of his emotions.

“I didn’t understand it at first,” he said, his voice softening. “Why I ended up at the clinic that night of the solstice. Why I fell asleep so easily in your space, a place that felt more like home than anywhere else has in years. Why, in Dawn, every moment I spent away from you felt wrong, like I was missing something vital. And then...” He hesitated, his jaw tightening. “When I saw you with Thesan, I felt this rage, this jealousy that I couldn’t explain. And that night, when the storm came, I accepted that I would die—because being with you in that moment, even if it was the end, felt right.”

His voice cracked, and you felt your breath hitch as his words pressed against the tender parts of your heart.

“And then you saved us,” Azriel whispered, his shadows curling around you both now, a silent embrace. “And the bond snapped into place, and everything suddenly made sense. And gods, I’ve hated myself every day since for talking to you about Elain—for putting you through that pain without even knowing it.”

You couldn’t stop the tears that slipped down your cheeks, and you reached up, placing your hand on his face. His golden eyes closed briefly at your touch, leaning into your palm as though it grounded him.

“And tonight,” he went on, his voice trembling with emotion, “when I saw you with Lucien, I felt it again. That jealousy. The way you smiled, the way you laughed with him... I wanted to be in his place so badly it hurt.”

His voice dropped to a whisper, thick with self-loathing. “And I know I don’t deserve you. Gods, I’ve been the worst to you. But, Y/N, you are everything I didn’t know I needed. You are smart, strong, considerate. You light up the room just by being in it. You make everyone around you better, just by existing. It is so, so easy to fall in love with you.”

Your breath caught in your throat, his words wrapping around you like a balm to your battered soul.

“And even if it’s for a year, or a month, or a single day,” Azriel said, his voice breaking, “I want to spend it with you. I want to be close to you, to be by your side, for however long we have.”

He reached out then, his hands trembling as they cupped your face, his thumbs brushing away your tears. His gaze burned into yours, his bond thrumming with a quiet, steady pulse that matched your own. “Please, Y/N. Let me be with you.”

You let out a small, shaky laugh, the sound soft and almost disbelieving as it fell between your lips. Your head dropped forward, resting gently against Azriel’s chest, his shirt dampening slightly with your tears. The both of you had shifted completely onto the ground, no longer kneeling but sitting in the snow. You were nearly in his lap, his arms instinctively wrapping around you, pulling you closer as though he feared you might disappear.

“I-I just don’t want you to feel obligated because of what happened tonight,” you murmured against his chest, your voice trembling. “I don’t want this to be out of pity.”

Azriel stilled for a moment, and then his hands cupped your face with such gentleness it made your breath hitch. He tilted your head upward, his golden eyes meeting yours, before leaning down and kissing you again—deeper this time, the connection searing into your very soul. It wasn’t hurried or desperate but deliberate, a kiss that held every unspoken word, every ounce of feeling he hadn’t yet been able to say.

When he pulled back, his forehead rested lightly against yours, and his hand moved to your shoulder, grounding himself in your presence as his scent wrapped around you. His shadows curled around the both of you like a protective cocoon, their touch faint and reassuring.

“Never, Y/N,” he murmured, his voice raw and barely above a whisper. “Never out of pity. I’ve long made up my mind about how I feel about you. Even if everything feels like a mess—if everything is wrong—I will never fall in love with you out of pity.”

The last words were so quiet, they were almost inaudible, but you heard them. And they wrapped around your heart, filling the cracks you hadn’t even realized were there.

Your hands moved on instinct, slipping inside his jacket as you hugged him closer, seeking his warmth and steadiness. Your palm pressed gently against his back, and your fingers began tracing soft circles at the base of his wings. Whether it was to reassure yourself that this moment was real or to offer him comfort, you didn’t know. Maybe it was both.

Azriel let out a quiet sigh, his chin resting lightly against your head as he held you. The snow continued to fall around you, the icy flakes melting against the shared heat between you. Neither of you spoke for a long time, the silence filled with the steady rhythm of your breathing, the faint pulse of the bond humming quietly between you.

For the first time in a long time, you felt something you hadn’t allowed yourself to feel in years: safe. And in Azriel’s arms, with his shadows weaving around you, it felt like you’d finally found the place where you belonged.

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[bubbbii]

A Birthday Promise

title : A Birthday Promise

pairing : Jungkook x Reader

genre : kpop smut, Jungkook smut, BTS smut, very dirty content

warning : name - calling, doggystyle, missionary, scratching, hair - pulling, birthday sex, choking, 21+ content

Summary :

“I could tell .. you’re eyeing me like a piece of meat”

[Hope uu guys enjoyed the Namjoon Smut ☺️]

!PURELY FICTION! !NOT REAL!

do not steal idea or story without permission please and thank you :)

Legoo

_______________________________________________

“Birthday Girl!! Plans is still on for tonight?” “Of course! I had invited sum extra people but everyone is gonna have their own table and such and we’ll all be together” “Sounds like a plan! How’s you and uh … Lucas?” “We stop talking, you know that. I blocked him, but it’s rumors that he’ll be attending tonight at the restaurant” “Uh oh, are you worried?” “Of course not, try anything you know my brother don’t play that” “Yea Namjoon he’s uh … something” “Tell me ‘bout it”

“Dress is still as planned?” “Yess i thank my girl Rosie for hooking me up, it’s gorgeous … but she told me someone had payed for it and won’t tell me who did” “Ain’t that a mystery” “Yea … and i’m gonna find out” “Y/N!” I recognize the voice of my brother, sighing as i went downstairs out of my room. “I need to take that key away from you” “Oh I love you too” I chuckled, feeling the kiss planted on the top of my head. “I’M HEREEE” I chuckled, hanging up the phone as Lisa arrived at the front door.

“You could’ve told me you were coming while you were on the phone with me” “But why would i do that that’ll ruin the surprise” I chuckled, feeling her embrace as she closed the door behind her. “As a tribute, i will be driving Y/N to her birthday dinner slash party” “Aww thank you Jiminie” “Since when did you tribute to anything?” I glared at Namjoon at his comment as Jimin huffed. “Anything for Y/N .. she’s getting old” “Uhh one year older?!” “Exactly” I smacked his head rolling my eyes as i made my way to a chair in the living room.

“But you know i wasn’t the only one, your little boyfriend tributes as well” I scoffed. “Which one, for sum reason there seems to be multiple” “And we don’t claim Lucas .. we’re talking about the boyfriend you won’t give a chance” I sighed softly, crossing my legs as i had an idea on who the “boyfriend” was. “How come” “It’s your birthday .. you know he won’t give up. Especially now knowing that you’re done with Lucas? He’s definitely shooting it! And i’m letting him” I sighed again.

“Y/N he’s good! You think i’ll let him come near you if i didn’t think he was fit ? He means good , despite just being a little younger” “2 years Joon .. i don’t wanna be a cougar!” “Is that all Y/N? You have no reason to NOT give that man a chance trust me he’s more mature than Lucas will ever be and he’s OLDER than you! Kook means good … even Jimin said it” “And ya’ll two should know out of all of us that my spirit, never lies”

It’s true.

“I don’t know Joon .. he could just be doing this for a bet” “Sis listen, don’t let what Lucas planted in your head block something that could be .. a lifetime! You don’t wanna give it a shot because he’s younger than you .. you don’t wanna give it a shot because you’re scared to try again” I gulped, the words cutting deep as i took a deep breath. As much as i wanted to shove those words back down his throat. I know i needed to hear them.

He knows exactly what to say to me.

“Now, he’s gonna take you to your dinner, i already talked to him” “Hey!” “Jimin now you know you wasn’t takin this girl! You know me better than that” Jimin sighed, agreeing as I looked at the two. “What if .. i don’t want him driving me?” “I know you better than that” Namjoon replied, walking off into the kitchen as i chuckled. “Trust me .. this is gonna be good!”

“How come Lisa? He’s right .. i’m scared! Jungkook is .. 2 years younger than me!” “Uhh Chen is 2 years younger than me and look how we turned out! Age doesn’t matter when that person you call ‘young’ had to grow up early and didn’t have a choice. He’s good boo. Now come on, let’s gon head and get sum to eat, and get ready. Tonight is gonna be amazing” I smiled, getting up to join the 2 boys in the kitchen.

Tonight will, be amazing.

Time Skip.

“You look .. beautiful” I smiled at myself in the mirror, admiring every curve that was shown, ever piece of skin that was exposed, every jewel that shined in the light … 25 looking good on me. “Sexy .. Grown, and Sexy. You” “You think so?” “Oh i know so! They’re gonna be looking at you” Lisa responded, coming up beside me to fix finishing touches as she was all done up as well. “You’re the star my love!” Definitely felt good going into this dinner.

“Now let’s go ahead grab our belongings and head on downstairs Joon and Jimin are waiting” I sprayed my perfume on me, grabbing my purse and watch before turning off the lights in the room. “Presenting! Queen Y/N” the two boys looked and saw me coming down the stairs, the heels clicking ever so lightly on the marble floor. “Oh i’m getting my instagram photos in” “My little sister not so little anymore” I smiled widely, finding warmth in my brothers embrace. “You know you’ll always be Oppa” Namjoon’s dimples showed, planting a soft kiss on my head.

“The others just made it to the venue, everyone’s there waiting for you Y/N!” The doorbell rung as everyone grabbed their belongings and Lisa opened the door to see a tall figure. “Ms Y/N … your driver has arrived right on time” Lisa announced, smirking at the younger man as she locked eyes with me, whose eyes were on the younger man.

The man’s hair was long and curly, the silky button up hugging his big boy muscles just right, and topped it with nice slacks and dress shoes. “We’ll leave yall too it, just don’t take too long” Namjoon interrupted, the 3 leaving.

And it was just me and Jungkook.

“You look .. very beautiful” “Yea .. thank you Jungkook. You look good yourself” Jungkook scoffed, looking down at himself. “Love those heels?” “They’re comfortable and stilettos! Thank you very much” Jungkook chuckled as i chuckled along with him, grabbing my purse. “You’re gonna be great, star of the show” “I’m always am” The two couldn’t keep their eyes off each other, the tension rising by the second. “Give in already”

And Y/N was ready to do just that.

“What are you talking about” “All you can do is stare but won’t do anything? Why? You’re afraid?” “Jungkook don’t start this” “I will .. i am” Jungkook said with a quickness, crossing his arms. “Everyone as gifts, on the tables and such. But my gift? Is a promise to you that you’ll have EVERYTHING you need in life i made a promise to myself that when i was ready Y/N you’ll be the one i run to. And think that i’m joking?” I sighed, my body getting heated.

And i couldn’t take it.

I smashed my lips on his, wrapping my arms around his neck as he held me close. He deepened the kiss, feeling every inch of me as i cupped his cheeks into my hands. We kissed for a little more, before slowly breaking it, our foreheads connecting. “Fuck” I breathed out, my eyes shut as felt Jungkook’s embrace. “Consider this a teaser, for when I give you my present” Jungkook smirked, making me chuckle at his words. “Got me a little excited” Jungkook hummed, planting a soft kiss on my lips.

“Well let’s get going, you got hundreds waiting for you” I smiled, seeing him turn off the lights and grabbed me by the hand and headed to the car. Once we got inside and drove off to the packed venue.

~~

Everyone had a blast, the night went on with drinks, food, laughter. It was what I imagined it to be, I couldn’t ask for anything more. “You’re in your thoughts! What’s going on?” Taehyung asked, crossing his legs as he sat beside me. “Nothing nothing just, calming myself down it’s so much haha” “Girl, now you know i know you right? Is it Jungkook?” “Ok me and Jungkook had a heated moment before we got here” “I knew it” I sighed, landing a head on Tae’s shoulder.

“Tae he’s everything i want! Everything i … I need” “Baby stop letting that bitch of a man get in the way of finding your blessing! Jungkook IS everything you need and you know that, so stop trying to fight it because we all see right through you. He sees it the most. Give the man a chance Y/N trust my word!” I sighed, giving Tae puppy eyes. “You serious?” “I’m deadass! He don’t play bout you. Speaking of .. where is Kook?” I looked at our table, and he wasn’t near. Nerves struck me and Tae got up and searched the huge restaurant from our point of view. No where.

“Outside?” Me and Tae went outside, to see 4 men. And i knew exactly who they were. One, wish i didn’t make eye contact with. “Y/N! Tell these men to get off my fucking back!” “I’m her brother i do what i want” “Guys whats going on?” “He decided he wanted to cause ruckus so i led him outside and Jungkook and Joon just happen to follow” Hoseok replied to Taehyung. “Lucas what are you doing here?” “To celebrate your birthday of course! If these dickheads would allow me?!” “You’re yelling doesn’t scare me” Jungkook said with calming energy. My hand made contact with his causing him to look at me.

“Come on, please” “Oh so ya’ll a thing now?” “It’s not like that Lucas, and besides it’s nun of your business what i got going on right now!” “Oh really? I’m that easy to get over?” “Y/N-“ “No no .. she got it” Joon stepped in interrupting Jungkook. “We were happy! You did it because you were bored!” “No - YOU WERE HAPPY! Who told you i was happy !? It wasn’t like we were dating because of this - fairytale that you planted in my head … YOU DID THAT! Lead me on and dug a grave to put me in Lucas. I cut you off because if i held off any longer i would’ve put my OWN DAMN SELF in that grave. But listen here, what I got going on and who i got going on right now and got shit to do with you and you’ll never understand”

“This little boy-“ “Little boy!? Lucas let me tell you something here, this ‘little boy’ will ever be more of a MAN you’ve ever been Lucas. He doesn’t show that he just wants my body, whenever i can be his uber driver that’s convenient to him, he cares for me and i actually feel LOVED from this ‘love’ shit! So i’ll leave you with this .. may my scars, and my tears wear you like a damn sweatshirt to remind you and every girl you come crosses with that i gave you that ego. You’ll never find someone like me” I poured out, taking a deep breath as i turned around and went inside the restaurant with everyone following me.

“I didn’t think you were like that” “Then you must not know Y/N, look where she gets it from” Namjoon hummed, agreeing with Hobi as i shook my head. “I didn’t want you to see that” I spoke, looking up at Jungkook. “I was right behind you, you handled that very well” “ALRIGHT GUYS LETS SING HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!” Everyone gathered around, singing happy birthday as i blew out the candles afterwards.

The cheers filled my ears as i smiled ear to ear. “Toast!? Y/N .. cheers too?” Namjoon announced, everyone holding up glasses and the room went silent as they waited for my words. I took my glass, looking at the wine swirling inside. “Cheers .. to a better lifestyle, better days,” I started, now locking eyes with Jungkook. “And new beginnings” I finished, everyone cheering as everyone clinked their glasses and drunk what was in their cup. “New beginnings huh?” I hummed, feeling Jungkook’s warmth as he closed the gap between us.

“I’m curious .. wise person told me to stop being afraid. I-I’m ready” I responded, looking into his eyes. I couldn’t get enough. “You had a good time?” “I did, tonight was amazing” “Good .. because i’m about to make it even better” Jungkook whispered, winking at me before moving away and left out the venue. My eyes widened, speed walking towards Tae, Jimin, Joon, and Lisa who were all in a group.

“Jungkook .. he-“ “We saw it all .. don’t worry i took care of everything. The rest would be at the house when we’re finished cleaning everything and pack the gifts, you’re gonna love what he did for you” I smiled ear to ear, hugging Namjoon as i rushed out the door and into the car with Jungkook.

~~~

We got out the car, Jungkook opening the door for me and soon turned on the lights leaving my eyes to widened. Rose petals were all over the floor, the modern living room decorated nicely with dark red decorations. I soon saw the luxury gift bags on the table which made me run over to them hearing Jungkook chuckle at my silliness. “Jungkook!! For me!?” “All for you” I looked at everything, landing a hand on his chest. “You like it?” “I love it kook, thank you” I responded, locking eyes with him.

And i definitely couldn’t take it.

I kissed him hungrily, wrapping my arms around his neck feeling his hands hold me close. “I’ve been waiting for this” Jungkook whispered out, picking me up and set me on the spacious black couch of mine. He took off my heels, lips still attatched to mine as he took off his shirt, and unzipped my dress which left me in my bra and panties.

“Ohh my pretty girl, in my favorite color” Jungkook cocked having me roll my eyes. “I didn’t wear this for you” “Oh you didn’t wear it for me?” I huffed, knowing i was in a trap and he chuckled. “You look beautiful” I hummed softly, feeling him gently kiss on my neck down my collarbone, and all the way down to my aching hood. He cupped it with the tatted hand of his, making my body jolt feeling the pleasure rise in my body. “Fuck .. please” “that feels good?” he moved his hand in circulation motion automatically having my hips roll with it.

“Oh she’s needy, don’t worry … i’ll take good care of you” Jungkook commented, turning his voice into a whisper as he slid my panties to the side and threw them on the spot beside him. “Raise your legs up high for me” I did as told, spreading my legs and he dug inside, devouring every juice that dripped into his mouth. “Oooh fuck! Just like that, fuck!” “Hold still princess” my arms wrapped his neck, my thighs trapping him as it motivated him to keep going.

He was not slowing down.

“Y-You’re going so fast … fuck!” “You might have a clue on what i’m trying to get you to do” My moans got breathless, feeling his tongue work skillfully in my folds, the tip of his tongue flicking up my clit. “I-I don’t wanna cum yet! I feel close already!” Jungkook chuckled, pussy sounds feeling my ears as he slobbered all over it. “You’re gonna cum when i want you too .. we’re on the same page?” I whined, but i felt him stop as his eyes locked with mine with a quickness. “Are we?” “Y-Yes, yes daddy”

Jungkook wasted no time, going back and sucking me out. This time, he used not even half his strength just to get me over the edge. “I feel close already.. i feel close i think i’m gonna cum!” “Oh you wanna cum for daddy? Cum for me princess it’s your day, cum for me baby girl” My back arched, feeling my juices flow all over, Jungkook being there to suck it all up as he moaned with me.

“My good girl, my good fucking girl good job. Good job baby” I moaned softly, seeing him slowly move away as his fingers moved up and down the outside slowly making me jolt a little bit. “Baby sensitive?” “N-No .. no i want you, please” Jungkook smirked, hovering over me as he landed his lips on mine. He took his pants off swiftly, his lips still attached to mine as he grinds against me. “Feel that? Feel that hard cock?” Jungkook whispered in my ear, making me whine as i bucked my hips.

“P-Please put it in” “How about you do that?” I grabbed it, slowly stuck it in and he did the rest by slowly pushing it in. My eyes rolled at the back of my head, feeling the big cock fill every single corner every single space inside me. “So f-full .. shit” “Tell me when you’re ready, fuck i need to stretch you out” “Slow .. slow please” Jungkook followed orders, slowly snapping his hips against me, hearing myself hiss and my pussy clenching around him.

“Fuckkk it feels so good, keep going, faster” “You need to loosen up for me baby. Come on open up for daddy” Jungkook grunted, his hips moving a bit faster as i started to loosen up little by little for him. “How long we going for this pace?” “O-Ok you can go just try-“ Jungkook wasted no time and fucked into me with no mercy behind it. He snapped his hips with all his might, hearing my screams and moans fill his ears. “YES! YES YES YES JUST LIKE THAT! J-JUST LIKE THAT DADDY FUCK!” “Keep going for me, clench on me like that you like that shit? You like daddy fucking you like that you little slut?”

I couldn’t take it, he was making me feel good in all the right places … he knew i needed this. How much i wanted this. And i applaud him for not giving up.

Because boy i would be shitty.

“I feel close.. i feel close, daddy” “You wanna cum together?” I nodded, pulling him closer and smashed my lips on his, feeling his hips snap faster against me and my insides starting to feel tense. “You ready?” “Y-Yea yea yea i’m cumming! I’m cumming daddy cum in me!” Jungkook groaned, hiding his face in my neck and we soon came together, both of us releasing all the sounds we wanted. He filled me, fucking me slowly before stopping completely and pulled out the soft cock. “You’re ok?” I nodded softly, feeling his soft kisses.

“Promise me … we’ll stick it out?” Jungkook smiled softly, planting a soft kiss on my lips. “Consider this .. a Birthday promise”

[mrslaflour]

ᙏ̤̫ GRAPE PARTY — ROUND TWO! kai says it’s the last round, but we know that’s a lie.

pairing — huening kai x reader

warnings — noncon, dark overall, continuation of the first grape party, overall fucked up you know that, height different, tbh maybe it’s because i’m judging my own shit but this to me looks bad because i never planned on making a part 2 but everybody wanted one and my blogs been being weird idfk i hope it fits your standards though

summary — you wake up in that bedroom. a bedroom that carried a lot of fucked up memories not just from you, but probably at least ten other girls. you wished you hadn’t woke up. they all seem to be gone except one. he was the nicest, so whatever. you ask to go home now, they got what they wanted after all. but poor you, he wasn’t finished just yet :(

it felt surreal to be laying here. surreal to even be breathing. hours of literal hell and you still lay in this sweaty, cum stained bed. how many times have they cleaned these sheets? the worst part is that you were still in this room, his room, and not home. not laid out in the middle of the school naked for a janitor to find you and not laid out in the middle of the street ready for some stranger to use you the same way they did. how did they get the others before you home? just push them out the house? you’d run home naked if it meant you’d get out of this place. but you still feel hands on you. a thumb rubbing circles into your hip, a hand on your stomach, and a head just barley in the crook of your neck.

“i had a lot of fun last night.”

kai. kai was still here laying right beside you. his voice vibrates your neck. if you were going to get stuck with any of them, you were glad it was him. but you didn’t particularly want to be stuck with him either. he treated all of this too normal and it was scary.

“i told the others i’d be the one to get you home so we could get more time together.”

you feel his smile against your neck.

“i, ah, we, wanted to keep you here longer. but the cheer team saw us go up after you when you went to the bathroom and…it’s just a whole thing.”

he pauses.

“if we got caught we’d probably never get a chance to feel you again. but if we send you on your way we’ll see each other in school, the streets, you know.”

“why are you still talking to me..?”

the circling in your hip pauses. as if he’s thinking of what to say.

“why wouldn’t i want to speak to you?”

“because i don’t want to speak,”

“i could help with that.”

after all the dirty talk and things they’ve done tonight, you knew damn well what he meant and immediately shook your head no. you don’t have the strength to cry anymore but oh do you want to. all you wanna do is go home and fall face first in your bed and sob your eyes out. you hear your phone ringing and lift your head to see it on the night stand next to you. it’s your friends caller ID. you frown and reach an arm out to grab the phone but he pulls your hand to his chest.

“do you feel my heartbeat? you’re the best i’ve ever had.”

you just stare at the phone as the ringing goes off for the last few times before it’s hangs up automatically. you immediately get spammed with a million text notifications (which you can only assume are from her). you hear kai sigh before he drops your hand and gets up, you finally felt like you could breathe a little.

“you know she’s been calling you non-stop this whole morning? i don’t know how you’re just now noticing.”

he grabs the phone before opening the bathroom door and throwing it in there.

“we probably have limited time together before she drives over here or whatever and i don’t have yeonjuns charm to cover me…”

he frowns at that. you didn’t know what his other teammates were doing. you didn’t have school today so they probably went out to fuck some other girl on the street.

you’re sitting up now. you lean over the side of the bed and see your clothing littered everywhere. a cut up shirt and pants tossed across the room. panties poking out from under the bed and your bra laying right in front of your face. you pick it up while he’s not looking and quickly clasp it on so you can at least get a little bit of coverage. when he turns back around he just looks down at your boobs and gives you a light smile before sitting on the bed criss cross right in front of you.

“i loved how they felt you know? pushed up against my chest as i took my time with you. they were so soft.”

you look around before looking him in the eyes trying to signal to him that you were uncomfortable, but he just looked like a lovesick puppy.

“i want this not to just be a one time thing, yknow. i wanna wake up to you in my arms everyday. i want you to be mine..”

he sort of mumbled the last part but you heard him loud and clear, and hell no. not in a million years. maybe before all of this. he was tall, hot, but also cute! easy and fun to talk to, a football player, rich even! the absolute package. but uhm, nowhere in that package did it mention that he was a rapist…? and no you’re not gonna just — no!

“i don’t want anything to do with you.”

his face drops a little. as if you actually had hurt him. he looks down at his lap before you can see his face lift up a little and it looks like he has a thought.

“were they mean to you?”

what? he was there, he would know. and although kai was probably as nice as a rapist could be, he was just as disgusting. you just stare at him like he’s crazy.

“you liked me the most, right? i made you feel good. i know you didn’t want me to stop. you didn’t want soobin to take his turn, just wanted me to stay inside of you.”

it’s quiet and uncomfortably silent before he places his hand on your shoulder, causing you to flinch. he then forcefully, but gently pushes you onto the bed.

“please don’t — you all said i was going home today…”

he just strokes your cheek with one hand before he starts kissing you all over your face and moving down to your neck. sucking slowly, taking his time, thus leaving deep purple hickeys. you had just realized he never took the bra off again. you just feel his finger trace the outline of the bra before he lifts his face from your neck.

“i think the bra makes them look cuter,”

he pauses with a smile.

“your turn.”

he leans forward and puts his neck near your mouth. you know what he wants you to do but you don’t want to give into his sick fantasy. you shake your head no.

“please? if you do i promise i won’t make your mouth do other things despite how much i want you to…”

you quickly suck the air through your teeth and take a deep breath before you start going as slow as possible sucking on his neck. you didn’t know weather to go super fast or super slow. super fast would make you seem as if you were happy to be getting him off, so happy that you were just rushing through, but going slow would make it seem like you wanted to be sensual and loving to him, but ultimately you went with going slow. your eyes closed trying to imagine time was going by faster and faster and you were driving closer and closer to your house. kais hand is stroking through your hair and his finger is running through your collarbone.

“the others are gonna wonder how i got you to do this. how i got you to mark me up all over my neck. it’s because you just love me so much, right?”

you shook your head no. you didn’t want to satisfy his sick fantasy. he just did a light click with his tongue and moved lower down your body, running his hands on your stomach before rubbing his thumbs in circles on your hips. your hips were all purple from the hard grips they had made on you the night before. you flinched slightly, they hurt badly. kai looked up and gave a pouty lip to you. you couldn’t tell if it was sincere or mocking. it may not have been mocking, but it certainly was not sincere. he leaned in and kissed the bruises that marked your hips before his lips got lower, and lower, and lower, and lower, and—

you quickly push his head away, clearly catching him off guard as he went back far pretty significantly. you push yourself back up and crawl to the other side of the bed before attempting to run to the door. obviously that was going to do nothing, but it didn’t hurt to try. he quickly stops you before you even get close to the door and he pulls your back into his stomach. the sweat on both his stomach and your back making you both become one. he wraps his arms around yours, glueing your arms to your side. he places his head into the crook of your neck, having to lean down quite a bit due to the scary height difference.

“why would you try to run knowing that i’d get you?”

you feel his lips pout against your neck. but you quickly realize, ‘i have a mouth’. you should have been screamed by now. there’s no loud music to distract the neigbors, they would hear you loud and clear by now. so you scream. loud. you get about two seconds of screaming out before he slams his palm over your mouth.

“why must you be so difficult?”

he shakes his head.

“i just want to show you how well i can treat you, is that so much to ask? it’s not even bad for you, it’s not like i’m hurting you, i’m just making you feel good..”

he sounds genuinely disappointed and upset. he easily lifts you up and puts you back onto the bed before holding your right hand and letting the other hand just lay there trying to push him away unsuccessfully.

“i can make you feel great baby, you know that. but maybe soobin made you forget. that’s okay, i’ll show you again hun.”

he brings your left hand to a halt by holding it with the hand that was once on your mouth, leaving you perfectly capable of screaming again, which you took full advantage of. he was going to stop you but he quickly realized that it was fine. you’d tire yourself out and most people were at work anyways. yeah, he’d still get his time with you. he moves his head down low once again and starts marking up the inside of your thighs and kissing all over you pussy and moving himself lower down to start fucking you with his tongue. you quickly try to lift yourself up to push him away, but you realize it’s quite hard to lift your chest up while your arms are pinned straight down to your sides. he squeezes your hands tighter and rubs circles into the palms of your hands while he continues to kiss and suck on your clit. you start to cry and beg him to stop and he just lifts his head back up to kiss your forehead before he moves back down to your pussy.

“shhh, just relax and let me take care of you. let’s focus all on you right now, let me make you feel good.”

what was so terrible about kai compared to the others was that he was loving. he had both yours and his pleasure in mind. he cared about weather you were in pain or not. with the others, it was easier to ignore it all and not give them any satisfaction and to piss them off by being dry but with kai? it was impossible. deep down you wished this wasn’t the situation that you two were in because had it been different circumstances, maybe you’d enjoy this and maybe you’d actually be with kai. you’re knocked out of your thoughts however by the continuous feeling of his tongue flicking your clit, determined to make you cum. you didn’t want to. you couldn’t. but you’d already been so abused and so much more sensitive from the events that took place only a couple of hours ago that you just couldn’t help it when you came. and when he kept going despite that, you start to squirm more in his grip, completely afraid.

“you can give me one more, right? just one more pretty girl, ‘promise.”

he was a liar. one more became two more and three more became four more. you hadn’t even noticed that he stopped as you’d just decided to block everything out. it wasn’t until he lets go of your wrists and towers himself over you, pulling down his pants that you snap your head back up to face him. you try to plead using your eyes, whispering small pleases and sorrys, but he just strokes your cheek and frowns at you.

“i’m sorry.”

you still. he’s sorry? you didn’t expect that. but was he really? he just dropped his pants down to his knees and was messing with his dick still, about to line it up with your entrance. he wasn’t fucking sorry.

“no you’re not. if you were sorry you’d stop now.”

your voice comes out all cracked out and hoarse from the screaming you had just done and the screaming you’d done that night before. you expected your voice would go completely missing soon. he just stares down at your entrance, as if contemplating continuing but he finally speaks.

“that’s not true. i just know how good i can make you feel. how good that we are for each other. and now that we’re alone, i can really show you.”

he presses himself inside of you and you just lay there. you couldn’t fight back anymore, you didn’t wanna try to. he couldn’t keep you here forever, he’d have to let you leave soon, so you weren’t worried about that. but as his thrusts continue for longer and longer and you start feeling yourself clenching around him tighter and tighter and you can see his smile growing, you have to look the other way and throw a hand over your mouth as you cry. you’d cried a lot the night before and a little this morning, but you were sobbing now. you couldn’t help it. he doesn’t stop though besides slowing down his movements a little, but he just moves your hand away from your mouth as he presses a kiss into you and holds you there while he finishes. he had finished first, but he was willing to overstimulate himself so that you could cum too, and when you knew that’s what he was waiting for, you just stopped fighting how your body felt and let your orgasm wash over you as your legs shake. he pulls out of you before pulling his boxers up. his pants were still down to his knees but he just laid next to you and pulled you against his chest.

“just ten more minutes of us just laying here, okay? and then we can go back to your house.”

you almost let that fly over your head. we. we. we? wait, we? no no no. he wasn’t going home with you! no, you couldn’t be trapped in this hell, you couldn’t be trapped next to him. you have to bite your lip back and scrunch your eyes shut and just nod. you didn’t wanna know what would happen if you disagreed, and you didn’t want to know what would happen once you went back to school, and you really didn’t wanna know what would happen when you’d go back home with him.

@blessedbymoon @straykidsviolet @lxsunshine @midnightathenaeum @beebrightness @hanhani29 @cassieaestheticsstuff @jastheepic @lickingan0rchid @alm0ndr4 @lailols @barbara-228

[theocddiaries]

Shadow: How’s Tails? Any better? Sonic: No. Ever since he had that nightmare about the tooth fairy, he’s been a nervous wreck. I can’t leave his side. Shadow: Hm. Sonic, when was the last time you spent time with your brother? One on one. Sonic: I took him to the dentist on Tuesday. Shadow: I mean doing something fun. Sonic: Hey, he had a blast scolding the dentist for having outdated magazines. …Okay. I don’t know, I saw him doing his own thing, and he’s not a little kid anymore, so I just gave him some space. But you might be right. I’ll talk to him. Tails! Can you come here for a second? [Tails comes out of his room with a broom and a tranquilizer gun, scanning the room before sitting on the couch, still on guard. Shadow and Sonic exchange a worried glance.] Sonic: Okay, buddy… [takes the gun from him]: Give me that. Look, I got the message. Tomorrow we’ll do whatever you want and I’ll make your favorite food, and we’ll have a sleepover. We’ll spend the whole day together. But please, drop the tooth fairy nonsense. Tails: It’s not nonsense, she’s really here! Sonic: Tails, I’m really sorry I made you feel abandoned. [From the hallway, Knuckles appears wearing a grotesque papier-mâché head with crudely drawn facial features, a disheveled wig under a tattered veil. He looks both ways before slipping into the bathroom.] Tails [screaming and pointing]: Aaah! There she is! There she is! [Shadow and Sonic turn, but Knuckles is already gone.] Sonic: Tails, there’s nothing there. Shadow: Okay, how about this? I’ll go spend a week with Rouge so you two can spend time together like old times. Tails: I don’t give a damn about your life, you egomaniac! There’s a lunatic in the house who wants to rip my teeth out! Aaaaaaaaah! There she is again! [Knuckles comes out of the bathroom, scratching his head in confusion. He heads toward the kitchen.] Sonic: Tails-- Tails: Look, look that way, please! [Sonic rolls his eyes and turns around.] Sonic: Tails, pal, there’s nothing. Tails: Yes, there is! She hides right when you look! She’s evil! Shadow: Kid, enough, okay? Your brother and I aren’t playing along anymore-- [Knuckles walks into the living room and taps Sonic on the shoulder while Shadow talks. Sonic turns around, sees him, and starts screaming along with Tails.] Sonic: Aaaaah! She’s real! Shadow: You aren't help-- Damn it! Tails: I told you! [shoves Shadow before running out]: Take him instead! [runs out of the house screaming] Knuckles: Hey, calm down, it’s me!!! Sonic: Knuckles? Knuckles: Help me get the head off, it’s stuck. Shadow [removes it after a few tries]: What the hell do you think you're doing?? Knuckles: Me? Bringing back the magic for Tails. Shadow: How? By haunting him dressed like La Llorona? Knuckles: No, I’m the tooth fairy. Sonic: That's great, because you’re gonna need new teeth when I knock yours out, you idiot! The kid’s terrified! He hasn’t slept in three days, he’s more owl than fox at this point because of you! Shadow: Look, you’re going to tell Tails it was you pulling one of your dumb stunts. Knuckles: I can't tell him. That’s like Superman admitting he’s Spider-Man. It ruins the magic. Shadow: What magic? You’ve got a serious problem with language. That costume causes a lot of things: disgust, unease, terror, but magic ain’t one of them! Sonic: I spent countless hours editing VHS tapes and DVDs so the kid could watch Bambi without the mother’s death scene, and you traumatized him in one night. First and last time you scare him like this! And especially the last time you mention the stupid tooth fairy! Knuckles: Stupid tooth fairy? Well, then, let’s call Santa Claus ‘fat bastard’ and Kermit the Frog ‘amphibian jerk’ while we’re at it! There's no values anymore! Bitter losers! [storms off] Sonic: Unbelievable… Knuckles [comes back]: Sorry, guys, I lost my head. Sonic: Thank you. Knuckles: Hm? No, I mean literally, I lost the head for my costume… Oh wait, here it is. [picks it up]: So, screw you both, Grumpy and Grumpier.

[anonymousewrites]

Lavender for Royalty; Sage for Wisdom (Book 1) Chapter Twenty-One

Kyoya Ootori x Reader

Chapter Twenty-One: Oak for Strength

Summary: The Host Club tries to help Kasanoda. It, of course, does not go as planned.

            “A werewolf! Eek!”

            Tamaki sighed as Bossanova’s appearance in the Host Club once again scared guests off. He had tried to make him cute with cat ears and a waiter’s outfit, but Bossanova’s fearsome expression wasn’t to be softened.

            “They ran away again. Despite being the ultimate healing item, even kitten ears failed,” said Tamaki. “How strange. Kitten ears have been a turn-on for guys since antiquity. Everyone knows that. And Renge said quite passionately that they’re popular with girls these days as well.”

            “Doesn’t that limit our range to Otaku only?” said Haruhi. “I mean, if you’re getting information from just Renge…”

            “I don’t know about turn-ons, but kitten ears might not be enough to counter his evil face,” said Kyoya. As soon as he said it, though, the picture of (Y/N) wearing cat ears went through his head. Cute. No way around it—cute.

            “Yeah, Boss is too soft,” said Hikaru.

            “If we’re gonna do this,” said Kaoru.

            “We need to combine kitten ears and a maid costume,” said the twins in tandem.

            “I see. I should have realized that,” said Tamaki, nodding.

            “That’s even more for maniacs!” cried Bossanova. “Are you guys jerking me around?!”

            “He’s mad! He’s scary!” said the twins.

            “I-I’m sorry,” said Bossanova. “You guys came up with so many operations for my benefit this week, but I feel like people are avoiding me even more. I’m just frustrated.”

            “Don’t worry,” said (Y/N). “It’s not your fault this time. The problem is obviously with the weird ideas they’re coming up with.” They chuckled. “I think that answer is simpler than everyone is making it.

            “No…It’s all my fault for not being able to benefit from their kindness,” said Bossanova. “I don’t look good in kitten ears or angel wings.”

            “Most people don’t wear those regularly,” said (Y/N).

            “But I really want to be a lovable person,” declared Bossanova. “Okay! The maid outfit! I’ll wear it.”

            “…” The twins grinned suddenly. Obviously, they had been teasing. But now they really got to have some fun.

l

            “I don’t know what I’m looking at,” said (Y/N). Bossanova had put on the dress, but it was over his uniform, so it was pretty…strange to look at.

            “I doubt we’ll ever have the hosts wear that,” said Kyoya, making a note to himself.

            Knock. “Excuse me.” A blonde boy poked his head in. “Is Master Kasanoda here?” His eyes landed on Bossanova in the maid costume. “M-Master?!”

            “UH?!” Bossanova was mortified, and his face contorted angrily.

            “I-I’m sorry…You’re in the midst of your secret hobby,” said the boy, bowing hastily.

            “What?! This isn’t my hobby!” said Bossanova. “Why did you come here anyway?! Get out!”

            “Please forgive me!” shouted the boy, running out of the room.

            “Bossanova, calm down,” said Haruhi and (Y/N).

            Poor Bossanova put himself in a corner. “I did it again…I hid my embarrassment by lashing out.”

            “Who was that?” said Kyoya.

            “Oh, he’s one of my men, Tetsuya,” said Bossanova. “A year ago he suddenly appearing saying he had to join us no matter what. He’s a hard worker and is always hanging around me, so he’s the one I end up scaring the most.”

            But he still goes to Bossanova. He must actually like him. That’s one more friend than Bossanova realizes he has, thought (Y/N).

            “What a grievous state of affairs,” said Tamaki.

            “I wonder what he came here for…” said Bossanova.

            “Indeed,” said Kyoya, raising a brow.

l

            “Mori is being targeting by the paranormal?!” siad Tamaki the next day.

            Mori nodded, and Honey hugged him.

            “He cut his fingers on glass, someone threw a bucket of water at him, and rotten eggs almost hit him, too!” said Honey.

            “That’s not paranormal,” said (Y/N).

            “And there’s more,” said Hikaru. “A flower pot, an encyclopedia, a VCR, a roof tile…”

            “His tile-chop was awesome,” said Kaoru.

            “Mori, are you alright? That’s awful,” said Tamaki.

            “Anyone but Mori could have been seriously hurt,” said Kyoya.

            “Did you break a Jizo statue or something, Mori?” said Kaoru.

            “Or step on Beelzeneff?” said Hikaru.

            “Is Takashi cursed?” said Honey.

            “Hey! This is no time for fooling around,” said Bossanova. “I saw all the incidents myself, and he’s definitely under attack!”

            “No way,” said the twins, waving their hands. “No one can hate Mori.”

            “How can you be sure—”

            The Hosts (most, at least) ignored him.

            “Would you like me to introduce you to an exorcist?” said Kyoya.

            “An exorcism! An exorcism! Yay!” said Honey.

            “No, send for Nekozawa,” said the twins.

            Bossanova gave up and walked out the door. Haruhi frowned and looked at (Y/N). They nodded, giving her leave to follow him while the others continued chatting.

            “So, shall we follow?” said (Y/N).

            “I can’t believe Bossanova doesn’t realize he’s the one under attack, not Mori,” said Honey, smiling.

            “At least it means we can watch him,” said Tamaki.

            “It’s good that you noticed the glass in his locker and got rid of it before he did, Mori,” said Tamaki.

            “He would’ve fought someone and damaged his reputation more,” said Hikaru and Kaoru.

            Mori nodded. He helped people who deserved it, and Bossanova had.

            “Where’s Haruhi?” said Tamaki.

            “She wanted to talk to Bossanova,” said (Y/N). “I think it will be good for him.”

            “But what about his enemies?” cried Tamaki.

            “We’ll get them,” said Honey, grinning.

l

            “This’ll teach him,” muttered a man, holding up a balloon of paint.

            “Yeah,” agreed a second.

            They threw the paint balloon, and it hit Haruhi instead of Bossanova.

            “Try again,” said one of the men.

            Two long arms swooped down and grabbed them. The men squawked indignantly. “Let go!”

            Mori wasn’t going to.

            “Mori-senpai!” exclaimed Bossanova in surprise.

            “What’s going on?” said Haruhi, looking at (Y/N).

            “We’re just cleaning up some trash,” they said, smiling while Hikaru and Kaoru tied up the troublemakers and Kyoya took a photo.

            “Hey, Kasanoda, you coward!” shouted one man.

            “You kidnapped our boss’s son and then hired a bodyguard!” shouted the second. “You kidnapper! Give our boy back!”

            “What are you talking about?!” said Bossanova, completely blindsided.

            “They were after you the whole time, not Mori,” said (Y/N).

            “We didn’t want to tell you,” said Honey. “You would’ve gotten discouraged! But Takashi found broken glass in your locker yesterday.”

            “Why didn’t you tell me?” Bossanova looked at Mori. “Instead you helped me…?”

            Mori patted Bossanova on the head, and Bossanova’s eyes widened in surprise at the kind gesture.

            “I know a villain when I see one,” said Mori. “Just be yourself. People who understand you are bound to appear. If you care a lot about your friends, they are sure to understand you. You should realize that.”

            Bossanova’s eyes widened at the honest words. But I don’t have anyone like that—

            “I thought I saw some familiar faces.” Tetsuya stepped out of the trees in the courtyard.

            “Master Tetsuya!” said the men.

            “Master Tetsuya,” repeated (Y/N).

            “Ah,” said Kyoya as they made the connection together.

            Tetsuya glared down at the men. “You play dirty because you don’t have the guts for a straight fight! I left because I couldn’t stand people like you. If you try to hurt Master Kasanoda again…I’ll send you to Hell alive!

            “Tetsuya, you…?” Bossanova trailed off.

            “I’m sorry for not telling you,” said Tetsuya. “I’m the second son of the Tokyo branch of the Sendo family. I’m Tetsuya Sendo. I’m drawn to Master’s personality. I’ve already made up my mind to leave the Sendo family and swear loyalty to the Kasanodas. I’ve always been against the Sendos’ unscrupulous policies. On a rainy day about a year ago, I had a fight with my father and left home. I had no place to go, but I couldn’t go back. Then Master came along and covered me with his umbrella, a total stranger…” Tetsuya smiled fondly at the memory.

            “I did that?” said Bossanova, surprised at himself.

            “Yes, you did. Even if you’ve forgotten, I never well.” Tetsuya’s gaze gently at Bossanova. “I know you like animals. You’re a softie for touching stories and dramatic movies. On the guys’ birthdays you secretly send them a cake. On Christmas you leave presents by our bedside

            “You’ve been doing stuff like that, Bossanova?” said the twins.

            “It looks like he was already doing what he needed to in order to show he cared,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “As usual, Tamaki overcomplicated things,” said Kyoya.

            “Yes, but Mori came through when needed most,” said (Y/N).

            “You are shy and clumsy,” said Tetsuya. “I know it, and everyone in the family knows it as well. We can’t say anything because you’d be embarrassed. As for your scary face, sorry, but I’ll try my best to get used to it.”

            Some things are hopeless, thought (Y/N).

            “I take responsibility for their offense,” said Tetsuya, throwing a glare of the thugs of the Sendo family. “But please.” He bowed. “Allow me to stay by your side!” He straightened. “Oh! And here, I didn’t have a chance to give it to you yesterday, but the weather has been bad lately.” He held out an umbrella. “A spare umbrella! Everyone worries if Master catches cold.”

            “Sorry to interrupt such a touching scene, but you commute by car, so you don’t need one,” said Hikaru and Kaoru.

            (Y/N) grabbed them by the collar and dragged them back.

            “Th-That’s right,” said Tetsuya, growing nervous. “I’m sorry.”

            “No!” A heavy blush rested on Bossanova’s cheeks, and he held the umbrella tightly. “Thank you!”

            “Sure!” said Tetsuya, also blushing.

            “All’s well that ends well,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “And Bossanova will cease to bother the Host Club,” said Kyoya, pleased by the development.

            “Oh, I have to apologize to Haruhi,” said Bossanova. “He got covered in paint because of me.”

            “Haruhi is changing clothes,” said Honey helpfully.

            “I’ll go find him. Thanks,” said Bossanova.

            “See you later, Master!” said Tetsuya. “We can play kick the can this afternoon!”

            “Well, we did a good deed,” said Tamaki. “They’ll live happily ever after.”

            “Boss, you didn’t do anything,” said Hikaru and Kaoru.

            “Mori was the hero this time,” said Kyoya. “He even had a speech.”

            (Y/N) tilted their head as they watched Bossanova disappear into the building. “Is he going to interrupt Haruhi changing?”

            “To say he’s thankful for the Host Club,” said Tamaki, still delusional about his involvement.

            “…Haruhi is a girl,” said (Y/N).

            The Host Club froze. Haruhi!

            “Haruhi! We’re coming to save you!” Tamaki took off running, tailed by Hikaru and Kaoru.

            “It’s too late, isn’t it?” said (Y/N), wincing

            Kyoya sighed. “Yes.” Still, there was little to do but follow after everyone to salvage the situation as they could.

            Sure enough, when the Hosts arrived at Music Room 3, it was too late. Bossanova stood outside the door with a shocked look on his face. The door was closed again, but he had seen Haruhi was a girl.

            “So you saw…” said Hikaru and Kaoru, appearing behind Bossanova with dark expressions.

            Tamaki looked like he was spiraling into space, nearly fainting.

            “U-Uh?!” Bossanova wasn’t used to fear, just embarrassment, but he was certainly feeling it now.

            “You saw? How much? You saw Haruhi’s modest body? You creep,” said the twins, advancing on Bossanova.

            “Bossanova…” said Honey. “I think perverts are scum…”

            Bossanova’s jaw dropped open.

            “Now what, Hikaru? He found out Haruhi’s secret,” said Kaoru.

            “We have no choice,” said Hikaru.

            Kaoru grabbed Bossanova, and Hikaru grabbed a bat from nowhere. “We beat the memory out of him!”

            “Cut that out,” said Kyoya. “Covering up a crime would be troublesome.”

            “I think a couple of hits are in order for not knocking before entering where someone is changing,” said (Y/N), crossing their arms.

            Bossanova flinched as Hikaru raised the bat again.

            “No, we have other matters to attend to,” said Kyoya.

            “How can you be so calm?!” said the twins. “You should’ve realized sooner that Haruhi was getting changed.”

            “We all should have,” said Kyoya.

            “Look!” Kaoru pointed at Tamaki. “Due to the shock, the boss is a mere hollow shell of a man! We refused to deal with him when he’s like that!”

            “I don’t want to,” said Kyoya. “But Bossanova found out Haruhi is a girl, so we need to confer. Mr. Kasanoda—”

            So we do know his name and just ignore it, thought (Y/N).

            “—Haruhi is in the special situation of having to hide the fact that she’s a girl,” said Kyoya. “The reason she is in the Host Club is to present herself at a boy.”

            Most of this is kind of true.

            “We don’t have the right to forbid you to tell anyone, but would you be so kind as to consider what would happen should not only the Ootori family but also the families of the other club members become your foes, hm?” said Kyoya. An insidious aura radiated from him despite the smile.

            “Hey.” Haruhi, fully dressed, stepped outside the room. “Stop threatening Casanova.” Bossanova averted his gaze in embarrassment as she approached. “I’m sorry I surprised you, Casanova. I don’t mind if you tell. I’m completely fine with that.”

            An audible crack echoed through the room as Tamaki collapsed in shock.

            (Y/N) sighed. What was going to come next? Would he tell or would he keep her secret?

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[polo-drone-110]

Who You Gonna Call

Part 4 - Mirror Mirror

Coach tightened the strap on his gear, rolling his shoulders like a boxer stepping into the ring. “We’re going back in.”

Ross hesitated, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Already?” His voice carried the distinct tone of someone hoping for at least five more minutes of not dealing with a haunted death trap.

“We don’t have time to waste,” Coach said, double-checking his supplies. “If we’re getting Trevor and Chevy back, we need to find whatever’s keeping the ghost here. Spirits don’t just float around aimlessly—they latch onto something. The room with the highest activity will tell us where.”

Before Ross could respond, Coach snatched the EMF reader from his hands, gave it a quick wave through the air, then shoved it right back at him. “So start looking.”

Ross gripped the device like it was the last thing tethering him to sanity. “And if we see anything weird, we run, right?”

Coach was already walking toward the house. “We’ll see.”

Ross groaned under his breath, dragging his feet as he followed. He cast a quick glance back at the van, where Brody sat comfortably in the glow of multiple monitors, looking far too at ease. Brody met his eyes and gave the smallest nod, the universal gesture of Better you than me, before taking a sip of his coffee. Ross muttered a curse and hurried after Coach.

Inside, the house felt even heavier than before, like stepping into a thick fog made of pure dread. The silence pressed in on them, each floorboard creak sounding like a gunshot in the stillness. The air was stale, and the deeper they moved, the more Ross felt like something was waiting.

“Keep that reader up,” Coach said, voice lower now, like even he didn’t want to disturb the quiet. “Let’s find this thing.”

They worked their way through the hall and back into the bedroom, where the EMF reader immediately went berserk, beeping erratically in Ross’s hands. He nearly dropped it, cursing as he struggled to adjust his grip. “Oh yeah, real subtle haunting. Totally not obvious at all,” he muttered.

Coach’s flashlight swept across the room, but Ross’s beam found something first—an ornate mirror hanging on the far wall, its gilded frame dulled by dust and age. The glass, however, was pristine. Too pristine. It shimmered unnaturally, the surface rippling like disturbed water.

“There,” Ross said, taking an instinctive step forward. “That’s gotta be it.”

Before he could get any closer, Coach’s hand clamped down on his shoulder, yanking him back with enough force to make him stumble. “Don’t look into it.”

Ross blinked at him. “What? Why not?”

Before Coach could answer, Brody’s voice crackled through the radio. “Uh, guys? That mirror just lit up on the cams. And I don’t mean, like, caught a glare. I mean it glowed. That’s—yeah, that’s not normal.”

Coach gave a firm nod, his grip still locked on Ross. “Because it’s a trap, that’s why. You stare too long, and you’re next.”

A shiver ran down Ross’s spine as he forced himself to look away. “Okay, great. Fantastic. So how do we not end up like Trevor and Chevy?”

Coach exhaled through his nose, fingers tightening ever so slightly. “That’s the part I haven’t figured out yet.”

As if in response, the mirror pulsed, the light within shifting like something beneath the surface was pressing against it. Watching. Waiting. The temperature in the room dropped, and Ross instinctively stepped closer to Coach.

Brody’s voice came through again, quieter this time. “I don’t think it wants you to figure it out.”

Coach’s eyes never left the mirror, his expression set like stone. “Brody, grab the salt and the extra incense from the van. We’ll need them to deal with this.”

The radio crackled with Brody’s immediate response, his voice utterly devoid of hesitation. “Yeah, that’s gonna be a no from me dog. Not stepping one foot out of this van.”

Coach sighed and rubbed his fingers along the bridge of his nose. “Fine. Ross, go get it.”

Ross’s head snapped up. “Wait, why me?”

Coach didn’t even look at him. “Because I’m not leaving this thing alone, and Brody’s apparently cemented to his seat.” He gestured toward the door. “Now move.”

Ross groaned, already backing toward the hallway. “If I get grabbed on the way, I’m haunting both of you.”

Brody’s voice crackled through just as Ross disappeared from sight. “Just don’t screw it up like the incense.”

All Coach heard was Ross scoff as he disappeared down the hall. Without warning the air in the bedroom grew heavier…colder. The dim overhead light flickered softly, casting shadows that seemed to move with a will of their own. He exhaled slowly, gripping the EMF reader tighter, steeling his nerves. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. The silence stretched, heavy and unnatural.

Movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and he inadvertently found himself gazing directly into the mirror. Before his own warning was able to ring through his head, he found himself staring at his reflection, unable to place something about it being just slightly…off. It stood rigid, just as he was—but then something shifted, his boots started to darken. The worn leather rippled, smoothing over into something sleek, something glossy. He could only stare as the change spread upward, the fabric of his pants melding into the boots seamlessly, molding around his to his legs tightly.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, it was clear the mirror was playing tricks on him but a warm, almost pleasantly tight feeling spread through his feet and legs. His eyes shot open and he looked down to see his familiar pants and leather boots. A brief, uneasy sigh escaped him at the realization that it really was just a trick, but that as cut short when he felt the tight embrace of ghostly rubber advancing higher still.

His gaze snapped back to the mirror. Wide-eyed, he saw that transformation was progressing with or without him looking into the mirror. The rubber had flowed over his thighs, his waist. Even worse was the sensation was starting in his fingers and hands now too. The skin on his hands darkened next, wrinkles and blemishes smoothing out into a perfect, seamless black rubber.

The tightness continued its spread, pleasure creeping over his skin. He took a deep breath. It was all a trick. If he could get away from the mirror he would be ok. Despite the rubber being confined to the reflection, his body resisted him moving towards the door, almost like it was trying to keep him from fleeing.

The rubbery feeling advanced further and further up his arms and around his waist as he struggled towards the doorway. The creak of rubber filled the room right as he was within reach of the door as it forcibly swung closed, sealing him inside the room. "Because of course that would have been too easy." he whispered to himself.

The pleasant tightness crept over his chest and back now and he couldn't help but feel his steel resolve waver slightly as a moan slipped from him. It felt good…too good. He ran a hand over his chest, feeling his rubber covered hand gliding over his now tight, rubber chest. Another moan slipped free as it slid down his slick abdomen, lower and lower until….

The sound of screaking latex pulled him from his daze, and his attention back to the mirror. The mirror that now reflected his now almost entirely rubber covered body, now just his head uncovered standing near the supernaturally locked door to the bedroom staring back at him. He could feel the tight rubber around him and couldn't deny how good he looked with it reflecting in the dim lighting.

A shimmer in the reflection drew his attention and in an instant he saw that there was dark black rubber gasmask gripped tightly in his hands. Coach's breath quickened as he stared at the gas mask in his hands. He didn't remember picking it up, yet there it was—its glossy black surface gleaming under the dim light. His fingers gripped the material tightly. A cold dread settled in his stomach as he looked down at himself, and the air in his lungs escaped in a sharp gasp. The transformation wasn’t just in the mirror anymore. The snug embrace of rubber was real, sealing him in from the neck down, hugging every muscle in a perfectly sculpted sheen. His boots, his pants, his jacket—gone. All replaced by the seamless, inescapable rubber.

He staggered back, hands trembling, but the suit held firm. It felt right, perfect, but his mind rebelled against the unnatural sensation. His fingers twitched against the mask, a thought creeping into his mind…to put it on. The thought sent a jolt of panic through him, and he clenched his jaw, willing himself to drop the mask. But his body refused.

The warmth pulsed again, curling up his arms, across his chest. His reflection had changed even more now, fully coated in gleaming rubber from the neck down. He could only stare at it—at himself. His stance had shifted, straighter, more rigid. His body looked powerful, sculpted beneath the smooth surface.

The mirror pulsed again, the reflection tilting its head—not in mimicry, but in observation, as if watching him struggle. Coach’s fingers twitched, still wrapped around the gas mask, and his breath quickened as he tried—tried—to let go. But his body refused. The smooth rubber encasing him hummed, the tightness sinking deeper into his muscles, his bones. His reflection lifted the mask to its face, and his own arms obeyed, bringing it closer, the scent of rubber filling his senses. He clenched his jaw, resisting, but the moment the edges of the mask touched his skin, a warm, tingling pressure surged through his head. A sharp gasp escaped his lips as the material moved, creeping over his head and sealing itself around him entirely.

It was like a second skin sliding into place, fusing with the rest of the suit, cutting off any trace of his bare flesh. The rubber tightened around him, molding to him, smoothing away any last sign of individuality. His breath came hot and heavy through the built-in filters, the soft hiss of air cycling in and out setting a steady, controlled rhythm. His thoughts swam, his resistance fading beneath the suffocating pleasure of the suit’s embrace. The pleasant tightness wasn’t just external anymore—it was in his mind, sinking deeper, soothing, silencing. His name, his purpose, his will—distant echoes swallowed by the rubber. He belonged this way. He had always belonged this way.

The mirror pulsed one final time, and the lenses of the mask darkened. No hesitation, no lingering defiance. The figure in the reflection straightened, standing tall, motionless, obedient. The struggle was over. There was nothing left to fight. Just the silent, perfect stillness of black rubber.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Do you want to join? Contact our recruiters: @brodygold , @goldenherc9, or @polo-drone-001.”

[ladykailitha]

The Au Pair Boy Part 14

There is just one more chapter, can you believe it? It is so insane to me that by this time next week, this story will be complete.

Thank you to everyone who has cheered me along, liked, commented, and reblogged. You guys are the best!!

In this we have Jane's happily ever after and the girl's birthday. And maybe a little bit of that final push for Steve and Eddie from Wayne.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

~

Hopper was waiting in the front room, pacing back and forth. His face had been shaved and his goatee neatened up. His hair was neatly styled and he wore a well-fitted suit, all paid for, no doubt from Eddie’s coffers.

Soon enough Max was leading a very put together Jane. She was wearing a pink, sleeveless button up with the front tied and a white pleated skirt and matching flats. She put a hand on her head.

Eddie spotted the motion and jumped up. “I’ve got you!” He dashed off and came back with pink knitted beanie.

“Chrissy was learning how to knit for something to do while on tour,” he explained, handing it to her, “this was for Janie, but it was way too big.”

Jane pulled it over her head and then offered a tentative smile.

“Looks bitchin’, babe,” Eddie said with a broad smile and a thumb’s up.

Jane ducked her head to hide her blush as Max assured her that it did, in fact, look bitchin’. In the midst of everyone trying to cheer Jane up there was a knock on the door.

Steve went to go answer it as everyone else went to go sit in the living. He came back with a red-headed woman and an older man with grey hair.

“This is Dr. Owens who will be giving Jane a physical to make sure she’s okay,” he told them, “and this Barbara Holland. Joyce can’t be here because it’s a conflict of interest, but she told me Barb is the best of the best, so we’ll all be nice right?”

Everyone nodded.

Barb sat on the coffee table in front of Jane. “Hello, Jane. I’m Barb how are you feeling?”

Jane looked her dead in the eye and said with total conviction, “Safe.”

Barb smiled and reached out her hand. “Can I touch you?” Jane nodded and Barb gave her hand a squeeze. “I’m glad you feel that way and I’m going to do everything in my power to keep you feeling that way. So the first thing we’re going to do is the physical. You don’t have to get undressed or anything like that and then he’ll pull blood for testing.”

Jane’s eyes went wide but she nodded. Max took her other and gave it a squeeze of her own. She turned to Barb.

“Have you been informed of her being one of the Brenner experiments?” she asked coolly and formal.

Barb shared a glance with Dr. Owens and then turned back to the girls. “Yes, we have and I understand having her blood drawn is super scary for her, but we need to make sure she didn’t catch anything while living on the streets that need to be treated. We wouldn’t want her sick, right?”

Max glared at her for a moment and then nodded.

The rest of the meeting went really well with Dr. Owens being very gentle with Jane and making sure she knew what he was doing at all times. Barb was able to get all the information that she needed. She informed them that Becky Ives again refused to take custody of the girl, but was willing to allow Jane to visit her mom.

As she rose she asked one last question. “Which of the three of you will accepting parentis in loco?”

Hopper stood up quickly. “That would be me. I’ve got a house on the property with two bedrooms and everything she could want.”

Barb picked her file. “Yes, it seems that you passed the background check with flying colors. So congratulations Jim and Jane, you are now a family.”

Jane’s eyes lit up. “Just like that?”

Barb nodded and Jane and Max hugged each other. Then she started hugging everyone else, including, to everyone surprise, Dr. Owens.

Then they said goodbye.

Steve clapped his hands together. “I think it’s time to celebrate, who’s up for pizza?!”

Everyone cheered and Hopper and Eddie shared knowing glance.

~

Of course it wasn’t really that simple, but as far Jane needed to know it was. Hopper had a lot of meetings with Barb and Dr. Owen regarding her health and the kind of life she would living. They were shown her room and where she would be going to school.

Then they started the knowledge placement tests to find out how much she actually knew. It turned out that Jane had spent a lot of her time getting warm in libraries and museums so she knew more about English and history then most of her peers. She was really lacking in science and math, but with Dustin tackling one, and Mike tackling the other she was able to join their class only a month or two late.

Then it was time for Janice and Joan’s birthday. They were born on a bright October morning. The 13th, to be exact on a Friday. Eddie called them his lucky charms.

Steve had gone all out and bought matching everything in their favorite colors. Pink for Janice and blue for Joan. Judging from the way they kept choosing things differently and then suddenly agreeing, it was clear that this would be the last birthday where they perfectly lined up.

Eddie had enrolled the girls in a preschool for kids that missed the kindergarten cut of by this much and they had made lots of friends, that would all becoming to the party.

“You know,” Eddie murmured as Benny and Steve worked to get all the cupcakes frosted, “you don’t have to plan this. It’s not part of your job description and in fact I’d go as far to say that I’m pretty sure I have people for this. Chrissy for example.”

Steve snorted. “I don’t doubt her capabilities, but I live for this sort of thing. Plus, think of it as my gift to the girls, making it the best they possibly could have.”

Eddie smiled fondly at him and left them to their work. He wandered into the family room where everyone was gathered waiting for the little girls’ guests.

Jeff clapped him on the back. “Hey, man. Thanks for having us. I’m sorry we missed the first four, but we won’t miss the next forty, okay?”

Eddie smiled. The guys had really been working on becoming friends with him again. With even Miranda and Jeff moving to Indy full time to be near Eddie and the girls. Brian and Gareth were only in town until after Halloween, but it was great having them as long they had been.

“It’s great to see Miranda again,” he replied. “Has she gotten feistier?” He jerked his thumb behind him. “Because I just passed her on the way in and she embroiled in a long debate with Robin about the merits of foreign film.”

Jeff burst out laughing. “It started about whether Kirsten Stewart was a good actress or not. Miranda said she wasn’t. Robin said that she was the first American to win a French film award and Miranda said that it didn’t count.”

“And Robin insisted it did,” Eddie said nodding along. “I’m going to stay clear of that conversation then. Sheesh!”

“No wiser words that have ever been spoken, that,” Jeff said sagely. He looked around the room and smiled. “That Stevie sure has pull out all the stops for those two little girls. If you weren’t their dad, I’d say they loved him more than anyone.”

Eddie nodded. It was becoming increasingly clear how much his girls adored and loved Steve. He had become a fixture in their lives in a way you couldn’t tell he hadn’t always been there.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “Me, too.” He looked across the room where Benny and Steve had arrived with the now finished cupcakes and smiled fondly. This was his family now. All these people, the kids, their families, his band, Chrissy, Benny, too. But most importantly Steve.

“I’m in love with Steve,” he blurted out, eyes wide and more than a little frightened. “But I hired him to do a job, I don’t want to be one of those skeevy guys macking on the au pair boy and ‘elevating’ him from nanny to husband. It sounds like a bad romance novel.”

Jeff winced. That was something that Gareth, Brian, him and even Robin had discussed trying to find a way around. Because it was obvious that they both had feelings for each other. But that was such a hard hurdle to overcome.

“Fuck what other people think,” a warm tamber said behind them.

Both Jeff and Eddie turned around to see Wayne standing there with a cup in his hand.

“It’s not that simple,” Eddie whined. “I’m famous Wayne. His name is going to be all of the tabloids and gossip mags if I even go out in public with him without the girls. It’s going to be a mess.”

“Fuck what they think,” Wayne doubled down. “He loves you, he loves the girls, he likes you friends, hell, Ed he even likes your house, which even your friends find a little creepy.”

Jeff held up his finger and thumb close together. “A little bit.”

Eddie chewed his lip. “I love him. And so do Joanie and Janie.”

As if called Steve arrived at Eddie’s elbow. “Hey, the guests are set to arrive at any minute, can you look over everything and make sure it’s how the girls want it?”

Eddie scoffed. “As if you could produce anything less than perfect.” But he bowed anyway. “But of course my liege.”

“You’re the king of this castle,” Steve murmured gently, “and I am but a servant to it and you.”

Eddie stood up and realized how close they were standing. Their warm breath mingled and their noses brushed against each other. They couldn’t take their eyes off of the other, drowning in the sea of their eyes.

Behind them someone coughed discreetly and Eddie took a step back. Not a large one, just enough to calm his racing heart.

“Lead the way, my stalwart knight!” he said brightly and Steve turned around to show him where everything was laid out.

Jeff and Wayne both shook their heads.

“I thought they were actually going to kiss just now,” Jeff said a little breathless. “Like holy shit, they need to get their heads out their asses, soon. Before the tension snaps like a too tightly wound guitar string.”

Wayne hummed in agreement. Steve was coming up on six months with the Munsons and Wayne could tell that the girls were slowly starting lose memories of Ethan and the hurt he caused, and replace them with happy memories of Steve.

Across the room Steve and Eddie bent over the cupcakes with a smile. They were on a three-tiered stand with Joan’s name on one side and Janice’s name on the other.

“I like the gradient from blue to pink,” Eddie murmured, “with that soft purple in the middle.”

“It’s called lilac,” Steve said with a smile. “I thought it was great way to make both girls happy and their friends having options. The cupcakes are even a gradient, too, with chocolate for Joanie going to marbled in the lilac ones, then yellow cake in the pink ones for Janie.”

Eddie looked up at him in wonder. “You really are a marvel, Stevie.”

Steve blushed and scratched his check nervously. “I just wanted to make the day special for Joanie and Janie. They’ve had a really rough year and I wanted to make their day something to remember instead of all the bad stuff.”

Eddie gave him a fierce, quick hug. “Thank you so much,” he murmured into his shoulder. “I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

Steve just held him tight, drinking in the warmth from Eddie’s body and reveling in the solid form pressed against him. So he took his chance.

“I love you, Eddie,” he whispered, afraid that if he said it any louder then he would break this moment between them. “I’m so in love with you.”

Eddie squeezed Steve tighter, holding them as close as physics would allow. “I love you, too. So very much, but I was afraid of what people would think of you and how that might hurt the girls and I couldn’t–”

“Shhhh,” Steve murmured. “We can shield the girls from as much of the media as possible and I don’t care what people think. I’m willing to take that final step if you are.”

Eddie looked up and into the hazel eyes of the man he loved more than anything. He never thought he would love again after Ethan. Not after all the pain and torment and hell that man had put his family through. But now standing here in this man’s arms? He was home.

“Yes,” he breathed. “But we have a party to host and then we’ll talk, okay?”

Steve giggled. “Better than okay, that’s fantastic!”

And then as if on cue, the two girls came barreling up to them, hugging around both of their knees tightly.

“You guys ready for the best birthday you’ve had so far?” Eddie asked looking down at them with the biggest grin.

“Yeah!” they cheered together.

The party went off as well as it could with ten four to five year olds, six teens, and eight adults. There were two meltdowns and one temper tantrum, and one adult having to step away from the festivities for a moment to calm down.

Robin hadn’t been used to that many people all the time and she got overwhelmed. She stepped out on the veranda and took a deep breath of cool autumn air.

Steve joined her after a few moments.

“I think all children under the age of ten should come with a warning,” she said with a snort. “Caution: volatile under pressure.”

“I’m pretty sure you just described being human,” Steve said with a eye roll. He leaned on the railing and looked out onto the backyard where the teens were embroiled in a very heated game of croquette.

Jane was winning, but Steve was sure she was cheating too.

“So you ready to become Lady Munson and mistress of all you see here?” she asked bumping their shoulders together. Steve snorted. “Oh come on, I saw that hug before the party. That was way more than friendly.”

He blushed and hung his head between his shoulders. “We’re going to talk about it. See what dating looks like with the girls and Eddie being famous.”

“That’s something that is a slight more than there was before,” she murmured. “I’m glad you’re talking about it.”

Steve straightened up and turned back to look back at the party going on inside. He leaned against the railing. “I’ve never been this happy before and I don’t know how to contain all of it.”

“Three cheers to Nancy Wheeler then,” Robin said with a huff of laughter.

“I already sent her flowers with my first check,” Steve said with an answering smile. “I think Eddie did too, if I’m honest.”

Robin burst out laughing.

Just then Chrissy spotted them and raised a glass and a questioning eyebrow. Steve nodded that they were okay, but Chrissy started walking their way anyway.

“And here comes your own chance at happiness,” Steve said to Robin and got up to rejoin the party, passing Chrissy on his way.

Later that night when almost every else had gone home and the girls were put in bed, Steve looked out on the veranda and smiled at the sight.

Robin and Chrissy were chatting with their heads tilted, almost touching. Maybe they would both get their happiness tonight.

~

Tag List: CLOSED

1- @itsall-taken @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @tartarusknight @gregre369

2- ​@a-little-unsteddie @cryptid-system @maya-custodios-dionach @yesdangerpls @goodolefashionedloverboi

3- @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch

4- @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji @ollieolive @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1

5- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

6- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

7- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

8- @sadisticaltarts @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @dolphincliffs @steddie-as-they-go @steddieislife

9- @kultiras @morallyundefined @themoonagainstmers @fearieshadow @blondie1006

10- @thesecondfate @wheneverfeasible @depressed-freak13 @genderless-spoon @sadiea20

[desdemonafictional]

DAY 2: FAKE DATING

I've been way too busy to do every day of this event, but I do have a little fake dating fic to contribute! Content warning for under age drinking, but not in a very intense way.

---

“Did you want to sleep with him?” Kakashi asked.

A thrill of uncertainty shot through Gai, a strange mixture of trepidation and excitement. It was a festival night, late into the evening, and the crowd had become rowdy as the families with children peeled away one by one, leaving only merry adults and the shinobi odd teenager who was technically considered adult enough to do as they liked. As a chunin and an orphan, Gai easily qualified, and at seventeen, he was already as tall as any of the other men around. Unlike the friends he had come here with, he passed easily through the merriment without a second look.

The specter of the Jonin who had just moments earlier pressed his suit on Gai lingered over the conversation. Once he’d been meaningfully ushered out from the alley, Kakashi had quickly turned his focus on Gai. Kakashi’s anger was a cold frost over his already chilly disposition—at first Gai wasn’t certain exactly why he was angry. And then he’d realized.

“…No,” said Gai after too long of a pause. A part of him was mourning the opportunity to get some Life Experience, but the wiser parts of him knew that having sex in a public place with a stranger was the kind of thing only a reprehensible pervert would do.

Kakashi obviously wondered if Gai was some kind of reprehensible pervert, and was possibly even now downgrading Gai’s respectability stats in his head. Gai rushed to undo the damage.

 “Clearly that man had lost sway of his good sense,” Gai said, “what with the alcohol, or the hour, or some youthful impulse—”

“Youthful, huh,” Kakashi said. He looked Gai up and down like he wasn’t sure he could trust him anymore.

“I mean, I would never, ever, certainly not!” he stammered, flushing. “Might Gai is an upright gentleman! Such lewd engagements are beneath me, Kakashi! Obviously!”

“Right,” Kakashi said, in much the same tone, although there was a barely detectable thawing. “Well, I guess you’re too youthful for your own good, Gai. Apparently there’s a certain type who gets the wrong idea.”

Gai swallowed. “The idea that, that I’m…”

“An easy target,” Kakashi said, which was a relief, since Gai thought he was going to say something much worse. Still…

“I am not a target, Kakashi! I’m a chunin!” Gai puffed himself up.

“And you’re seventeen, and you’ve been drinking,” Kakashi said, scathingly. “You had three rounds of sake in the last hour. What would your father say?”

Irritation that Kakashi was talking down to him again warred with the heady feeling of having apparently been watched by Kakashi, for at least an hour. Why? Why was he watching Gai, when he could be down here with him, by his side, indulging in the same youthful misadventure?

“My father would say I was living my youth to the fullest,” Gai said, although he really was not sure. He crossed his arms, digging in his heels. “And you turned down my invitation to live it with me, so I don’t see what business it is of yours!”

“Oh, my mistake,” Kakashi said, dryly. “I’ll let the next forty year old pervert with a thing for teenagers stick his hands down your jumpsuit, then.”

Gai’s stomach did something unbearable, like it was flipping and catching fire all at once. He felt a bit faint.

“Clearly you need supervision,” Kakashi said, apparently taking Gai’s silence as tacit repentance. “Drink or don’t drink, it’s not my problem. The trouble is, men like that are going to think you’re drunk and available.”

“But I am available,” Gai pointed out. “Not—not for that! But I have yet to be spoken for by any of the fine men of Konoha, and—”

 “So we’ll just pretend like we’re an item,” Kakashi says, dispassionately, “to keep freaks like that from taking advantage of you.”

Gai’s mouth popped open and closed a few times.

“It’ll be easier to keep an eye on you up close anyway,” Kakashi said, “especially if you’re going to keep making irresponsible decisions.”

He stuck out his hand. Palm out. His face and body were a little turned away, impatient. Gai stared at his hand uncomprehending.

“Um,” Gai said.   

The fingers wiggled. Kakashi lifted his visible eyebrow. “Well?” he said.

Gai’s breath caught, his heart thumped wildly as he reached out. Kakashi’s hand was cool and gloved and white in the thin illumination of midnight, and when Gai took it, it closed more securely around him than any lock.

“Right,” Kakashi said. “So. Dango stall?”

They went to the dango stall. Kakashi’s hand remained tightly clasped around Gai’s for the rest of the night, while his single eye glowered lazily over the crowds. Gai remembered almost nothing of the night—his brain was too full of crackling spun sugar to conceive of much anything beyond Kakashi’s hot and slightly sweaty hand.

--

Half a year after the confusing evening in which Gai did not get the chance to explore the springtime of his budding sexuality but did get to monopolize Kakashi’s attention for a whole three hours until the summer festival finally shut down, the Gai who departed from the Akimichi clan Moon Viewing party in the bright October night was a little wiser and a little less impulsive.

Though he’d stayed out late, much later than he usually cared to, and accepted the good luck toast that Choza-sensei had procured for his old genin team—which he and Genma and Ebisu had accepted in the spirit of youthful bonding—he was well aware that he was pushing his luck. But the night was so bright and fresh, and the moon was so beautiful, and Gai felt stirred by the desire to be around others. Not to go home yet to his quiet apartment, but to remain in the warmth and the sound of human voices.

He was just considering whether he ought to go any further, standing before the door of the bustling tavern, when he felt the displacement of air. In a whirl of dust and leaves, Kakashi appeared at his side.

“Really?” he said, without looking at Gai. “You’re going to do it again? Some dirty old man is going to eat you alive in there.”

Gai side-eyed his rival, thinking quite a lot of things very quickly indeed.

“Oh, Kakashi,” he said, putting all his flair for the dramatic into it, “I am so inspired by the night and the joyous atmosphere of this festival! How I wish to celebrate it to the upmost! And yet, how can I protect my honor from the rapacious desires of so many strangers?”

“Hmph,” Kakashi said, lifting his chin. “Fine. I’ll pretend to be your boyfriend again.”

“Oh, would you?” Gai gasped. He took Kakashi by the hands and hauled him in, clutching him close. Kakashi turned pink on every visible millimeter of skin.  “Kakashi, what an excellent friend and comrade you are!”

“I, um,” Kakashi said. He was staring down at their hands, like he couldn’t quite look away. “Yes. Any time.”

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

I’ve been hoping for Jaylin to have a change of heart but after the whole 2 days after birth thing sHE IS GOING DOWN ⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️⛰️

She sort of is!

60 for ⛰️:

---

At the sound of the shouting, Arthur starts to cry again. 

“Shh, shh, shh,” Eddie tries to soothe him. “It’s all okay.”

Arthur doesn’t quiet. Eddie has never been good at comforting infants.

“It was a mistake!” Jaylin snaps back at Buck. “An accident! I didn’t leave the door open on purpose, Buck! I’m not an idiot.”

Well…

“And ignoring him?”  Buck demands. “Just a mistake?” 

“I was sleeping! I didn’t hear him!” 

“This is ridiculous. I’m taking him, like we agreed on. You can sober the fuck up or I’m keeping him for the night.”

Jaylin laughs bitterly. “You think you can do so much better? Like you never make mistakes…” 

“NOT LIKE THIS!” 

Eddie hears Buck storming back out of Jaylin’s room, into the living room.

“EDDIE?” He calls.

“In here!” Eddie calls. “Just cleaning him up.”

He finishes and brings Arthur out towards Buck, who reaches for him. Eddie passes the baby over and heads to the fridge to see if there are any bottles or anything to feed him. He spots two pre-made ones and grabs them. 

“You’re going to come with Daddy for a little,” Buck is whispering to his son. “Does that sound good?”

Eddie looks towards the bedroom door. He waits for Jaylin to come stumbling out. To make excuses. To say goodbye to her child. She doesn’t. Instead, Eddie thinks he hears her retch. 

Eddie takes his phone from his pocket and begins taking photos of the apartment. Buck watches him. His face is stony. 

“Let’s get out of here,” he says after a moment.

Two minutes later, Buck sits in the backseat of the Jeep, beside Arthur, feeding him the bottle, as Eddie buckles himself into the driver’s side. Neither of them have said a word since they grabbed what they could of the baby’s and left.

“Eddie,” Buck breaks the silence.

“Yeah?” Eddie replies. 

“Let’s call that lawyer tomorrow.”

Eddie feels relief course through him.

“Absolutely,” he says. “We’ll do that.”

🗻

Buck cancels most of the plans to introduce Arthur to everyone. Eddie doesn’t think he’s ever seen him so mad. So action oriented.

He calls Maddie. He explains the situation.

“I don’t know if I can send him back there tonight,” he says. “I don’t know when I’ll feel comfortable doing that.”

[jaymoriarty-knight]

"What? You left father?" Scott protested, interrupting the story.

"Hush Scott. There's more story left to tell. You shouldn't jump to conclusions," Charles hushed his son.

Scott sank back against his pillows. "But if father left you to seek a fortune, then how did he come back?"

"Well I suppose that would start with my kidnapping," Charles said reasonably.

"Kidnapping?" Scott sounded positively incredulous.

"Let Charles tell the story," Erik said gently.

Charles had watched Erik leave until he could stand it no longer. He returned inside the house and told himself that his Erik would come home, would come back to him.

Upon returning inside Charles was met by his father, who looked very pleased about something. Charles felt dread rise through his stomach and up into his throat, choking him.

"Well my boy," Brian Xavier grasped his son's shoulder. "Now that the farm boy you've been fooling about with is gone, your mother and I have excellent news."

"Father, I was not messing about. I love him and he's going to return to me." Charles said it with far more confidence than he felt. He knew how perilous and deadly the seas can be.

"Don’t be absurd Charles, darling," Sharon entered the room with a benign smile. "You have so much more potential than that."

"Mother," Charles allowed himself a sigh. "I have faith in Erik. He will return to me and we will wed. We are deeply in love."

"Love scarcely matters when you have a suitor already desiring your hand." Brian's grip on Charles’s shoulder tightened, making Charles flinch.

"I'm afraid I don't know what you speak of, Father."

"The Prince has taken an interest in you."

"The...Prince?"

"Yes, Prince Sebastian." Brian said it as though it were something Charles should be delighted by.

"But—"

"Hush now Charles. This is better news than we ever could have hoped for. The Prince, seeking a commoner husband and choosing you!" Sharon pinched Charles’s cheek.

"But I don't know him!" Charles protested. "I'm not going to marry someone I don't know!"

"That's what a courtship is for. Stop protesting Charles. You will do this. Or are you willing to bring shame and disgrace to our family?" Brian's voice went cold, the way it always did when Charles didn't behave himself.

"Father, I am in love. I cannot give myself to someone else. Not when Erik fills every part of me that is there for love."

"We’ll see about that." Brian warned Charles. Charles felt devoid of warmth. It had been but a few hours since Erik had departed and already everything had fallen apart.

Charles spent the next fortnight locked in his room, scarcely eating or drinking. He fell apart completely when he relieved a letter detailing Erik’s death at the hands of pirates. Charles became inconsolable with grief. He had shared everything he had to offer with Erik, loving him entirely and completely. To think the person who knew him best, who knew all his secrets and loved him wholly was gone... Charles fell deep into melancholy.

No one was able to get through to Charles. His parents resorted to a doctor, who said socialization and sustenance would be all that could help Charles.

Charles himself swore, "I will never love again."

A solemn five years went by, in which Charles played his part well. His heart never healed from being broken, but he had no further protest to his union to the Prince. He allowed the Prince to court him and participated in the customs and traditions that were expected of him. He gave no trouble and was loved by the populace.

Prince Sebastian gathered the people of Florin City in the main square to make an announcement. "My beloved people, a mon from now, on our great city's 500th anniversary I shall take a husband! On the sundown of our anniversary I shall be wed to the very man I have been courting! He is a commoner, much like yourselves. Would you like to meet him?"

The people gave much applause. Charles felt sickened. Nevertheless he held his head high and stepped out to the crowd. He was dressed up in finery the likes of which he had never felt. It disgusted him.

The crowd began to kneel before Charles, admiring his beauty. A young girl brought Charles a crown of flowers. She gave him a shy smile as she offered it. Charles returned the smile, kneeling before her. The only joy he'd found in the past five years was that of spending time with children, telling them stories, and teaching them interesting things. The little girl placed the flower crown atop Charles’s soft brown hair.

"Thank you my dear." Charles stood, giving the girl a warm, welcoming smile.

"See how kind my husband is," Sebastian called out to the crowd. "How good with children?"

Charles felt his throat close. "How kind of you Prince Sebastian, your highness," Charles replied, his voice strained.

[ezrasxfics]

some theatrebunny angst perhaps? maybe gangle feeling as if nobody really cares much about her and jax has to convince her otherwise? :3

(also hi ezra hope your days goin good)

you gotta be kidding me, you have plenty of people who care.

-

ribbun/theatrebunny

-

gangle pov

just.. another day. another day of looking at those fake smiles, hearing those forced words of reassurance. i know that none of them actually like me, so why do they have to keep pretending like they do? i mean, i’d hate for them to hate me, but i also hate them having to lie to keep me happy. i don’t want to be a burden.

at least one person doesn’t have to lie.

i glance over at jax, who’s messing with ragatha, as usual. he messes with all of us. it must be lonely, living like he does, but at least people don’t lie and pretend to like him. i can’t deny i’m a little jealous sometimes - he can just.. get people’s true colours out, in a way. it’s actually really interesting to watch.

he catches my eye, and starts to head over here, causing a small panic to set in me. i like being a spectator, not a victim.. is that cruel? i mean, im a cruel person, so why am i questioning that?

“hey, crybaby, how the hell’re you so down with that freakin’ happy mask of yours on?” he questions, and despite the wording, there’s not even a hint of malice behind his tone, just curiosity. surely there’s an ulterior motive, how would someone like him ever be.. well, not nice, but bearable??

“i guess.. i’m just tired of feeling like a- a burden-“ i stammer, looking up at him with wide, worried eyes. “everyone’s always so nice to me.. and i think they feel forced to-“

“bullsh*t,” he interrupts bluntly, making me flinch. “what reason to those guys have to hate you? you’re a decent person. you’ve not really done anything wrong, have ya?”

“i mean.. no, but-“

“yeah, no. it’s a one word answer, babe, and you’ve just finished it. you said no. so, you’ve done nothing wrong, they have no reason t’ hate ya. no ifs or buts, got it?” he interrupts again, eyebrows furrowed in sheer confidence in what he’s saying. but.. why is he being so kind? is he trying to lie like everyone else-? no. what would he have to gain from lying to me.? he’s not gonna risk his whole reputation just for a joke, right?? but, he could-? NO!! no, gangle, for once you need to take things at face value. he’s being nice. accept it and move on. let yourself enjoy the moment, it might be the only time this ever happens.

“yeah.. thank you, jax. i appreciate it— i’m sorry for bothering you-“

“you apologise way too much. it’s kinda pathetic-“ he jokes, but i can see the lightheartedness in it, and actually find myself laughing along.

why am i feeling like this? i’m supposed to hate him.. he’s caused me nothing but suffering since i got here, and yet, here i am, finally getting along with him? hoping things will change, and maybe we’ll be friends..? or more..? okay, maybe i’m being a little delusional on that part.. but i love the enemies to lovers trope, maybe a little too much..! i’m projecting again..

oh well, i guess a girl can dream.

and you know what they say, make your dreams come true.

<3

-

hey!! i’m actually doing pretty good, thanks for checking in!! i hope you’re good too, and thanks for the request!!

reblogs appreciated!!

[howertism]

he looks like a philosophy professor

[tenwhiteandalusians]

is episode 8 the domitian arc ? more on this and EVEN MORE narratives i’ve been ignoring that the show said “actually,,,” about in 5

[duahauuoplanh]

[sugarsnappeases]

thank you for the tag @fxreflyes this is so cute, except the format is trying to hinder my propensity to ramble, so i’ve rectified this in the tags lmao

i’m over 5'5 / i wear glasses or contacts / i have blonde hair / i often wear sweatshirts / i prefer loose clothing over tight clothes / i have one or two piercings / i have at least one tattoo / i have blue eyes / i have dyed or highlighted my hair / i have or have had braces / i have freckles / i paint my nails / i typically wear makeup / i don’t often smile / resting bitch face / i play sports / i play an instrument / i know more than one language / i can cook or bake / i like writing / i like to read / i can multitask / i’ve never dated anyone / i have a best friend i’ve known for over five years / i am an only child

no pressure tags for @static-radio-ao3 @inevitablestars @itsjaywalkers @carniferous @orbitfalls @transsexualpriest @futurequibblerjournalist <333

[kuiinncedes]

:c