#i do not value the opinions of 90% of people i knew in high school

[goldensunset]

every so often i open instagram to see if my siblings have sent me funny things via direct messages and instead i am forced to see people my age whom i haven’t heard from since middle school getting married. i am entitled to some form of compensation for this

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

Life in Quarantine (Part 1) | Owen Patrick Joyner

Summary: A series about being stuck in quarantine with your best friend Owen and trying not to lose your mind over being stuck inside all day every day. 

Pairing: Owen x reader

Warnings: Fluff, minor swearing, lots of singing

Songs used: Don’t Let Go by En Vouque/ Washington on Your Side from Hamilton/ More than Words by Little Mix / Not a Pop Song by Little Mix  -- All credits go to owners of these songs

A/N: I know nothing about songwriting and none of this will probably ever happened in real life, but it just worked for the story, alright? Alright. Enjoy! 

Words: 3,372

Part 1: Not A Pop Song

Norman, Oklahoma. My home town. The place where I was born and raised. The place where I learned how to live and love. Where I learned what heartbreak is. Where I met and lost friends. The town all my most valued memories reside. 

It’s also where I met my best friend, Owen. Our mothers were, and still are, college besties. So, us becoming friends was kind of inevitable. We went through everything together. Kindergarten, Elementary, Middle School and High School. Wherever you saw me, you saw Owen and vice versa. A lot of people often thought we were a couple, but that’s been off the table since day one. In Elementary School, Owen and I made a pact with five different rules to seal our friendship forever. The list only grew as we got older. But here’s the gist: 

1. If one is teased or bullied, the other takes revenge 2. Always sing and dance together whenever one asks, even if you don’t want to 3. Always share cookies 4. Always play together at recess 5. Always sit together at lunch

Then the additions from Middle and High School: 

6. We will never, ever, ever date each other or each other’s siblings 7. Ethan, Evan and Emmy are off limits too 8. Crushes too 9. Always go to Broadway shows together 10. Never lie even if you wanna do it for the right reasons. There is no right reason.  11. Always support each other’s dreams and successes 12. Always hate each other’s exes 13. Always share ice cream 14. Never share our secrets with other 15. Always go to parties together

That last one was added by Owen in senior year of High School when I didn’t want to go to a party since it was my exes party and we’re supposed to hate each other’s exes. But, since he’s been in LA for most of senior year to pursue his acting career, I really couldn’t say no. Him going off to Los Angeles for months, sometimes even longer, started in eighth grade when he landed the role of Crispo Powers in a Nickelodeon show called ‘100 things to do before High School’, which I religiously watched, of course.  Rule 9 tells you to. After High School, the two of us split ways. I headed off to Boston to study at Berklee College of Music to major in songwriting as it’s always been a dream of mine to become a songwriter, while Owen went to LA to further pursue his career in acting. We’ve tried to keep in contact, but daily calls turned into weekly calls turned into monthly calls. Five months in, we just try to at least check in with each other every now and then, which is what works best for our busy schedule. Then December 2018 came and changed my life entirely for the better. The representative of Syco and Columbia records said he was in need of fresh blood to co-write songs with none other than Little Mix on their next album.  They held a competition at Berklee College, and long story short, I won! Yay me. To say I was nervous to write with a girl group I’ve been a fan of since the very beginning is an understatement. But they were so nice to work with. We’d take turns flying to each other’s countries and wrote about five songs together of which only two made it onto the actual album. None of it made much sense to me at the time, it all just seemed like one big dream. Owen was pretty excited about it too. He knew how big a fan I was of the girls. Even though he wasn’t a big fan himself, he still listened to the album, mostly to listen to the songs I’d written. Over FaceTime, we even played a game called ‘Guess what song I’ve written’, and he’d gotten one right. The girls even gave you a full-time job as co-writer on more projects of theirs and even recommended you to other artists. This meant you had to quit college and become a full-time freelance songwriter. Thanks to Little Mix, though, you’ve gotten the nicest people to hire you. Since then, you’ve worked with artists like Meghan Trainor, Bea Miller, Isabella Merced -- who you could gossip with about Owen from her time working with him -- and even Harry Styles. The fifteen-year-old inside you didn’t know what to do with herself when that collaboration happened. But working with all those people also meant I had to move again. This time to Los Angeles. When I told Owen the good news, he immediately suggested you move in with him. It’s the thing you guys said you would do once you got older; get an apartment together. So, it was the only logical move. “Welcome to your new casa!” He said dramatically when leading me into the apartment. The tall white walls and large windows illuminated the entire place with a welcoming feeling. “Let me show you to your room, so you can drop off your excessive luggage and then I’ll give you the tour of the entire space.” I raise an eyebrow at his words. “Bro, I have excessive luggage because I just moved from Boston to freaking LA!” I exclaim, followed by an amused chuckle as I try to push him, but fail since he’s much stronger. From that moment on, I knew moving in with Owen would be the best and worst idea I ever had. 

And speaking of ‘worsts’. From March 2020, the two of us were stuck at home together due to the outbreak of the coronavirus. Just when I was supposed to start working with Little Mix on their new album. I would’ve been in London now, but instead, I’m stuck in LA with my best friend who doesn’t have a job at the moment since he’d just finished filming a new Netflix show called Julie and The Phantoms. What I heard from it this far, it sounds pretty amazing. I even went to Vancouver with Owen for a few weeks. It was a fun trip and gave me some new inspiration for some songs. “Hey, Nugget,” Owen says as he walks into the room we call our studio where I’m working. “I’m kinda in the middle of something, Ace. Can it wait?” I know I shouldn’t work out my frustration on my best friend, but it kind of fell out of my mouth before I could stop myself. “Sorry, Nugget, I’m kinda bored…” I sigh exasperatedly and bob my head to signal his permission to come in. “What are you working on?” he asks as he sits down on the armrest of the armchair I’m sitting on. “This Little Mix song I can’t seem to make work,” I reply and point to the notebook in front of me. “I’ve got a few good lyrics, but the melody seems impossible.” Owen takes the notebook from me and closes it before getting up. “Time for a little break,” he says and goes to sit behind his drum kit. “Guess what song I’m playing,” he then says and starts with the cymbals, then hi-hats and when a beat finally floats through the room, my brain starts to work. This is a game we’ve been playing every time I’m in need of a break or just for fun. We’d take turns in playing a part of a song on our respective instruments and the other has to guess which song it is by singing along. “What’s it gonna be? Cuz I can’t pretend Don’t you wanna be More than friends Hold me tight and don’t let go Don’t let go Have the right to lose control Don’t let go” A smile appears on Owen’s as I get the first song right. He always underestimates my love for girl bands from the 80’s and 90’s. Though, I think he might’ve given me this one because I’m so frustrated from working on that song. “Your turn,” he then says after having hit a couple more toms and cymbals. I think about it for a moment, and then start plucking the sixth string to create a more bassy sound. Owen stares at the guitar for a moment trying to figure out what song I’m playing. Then, his eyes widen as he recognizes the sound. “It must be nice, it must be nice To have Washington on your side It must be nice, it must be nice To have Washington on your side” I let out a loud whoop in excitement, choking the strings to stop the sound. “I still can’t do that rap though!” he actually sounds disappointed in himself. “Washington isn’t gon’ listen to disciplined dissidents This is the difference This kid is out!” I proudly yell out, earning impressed applause from my best friend. The smile on his face warms me up inside. Owen has always had the most beautiful smile, in my opinion. He has one of those smiles that could just instantly make you happy. No matter how bad a day you had. “Very impressive, Nugget,” he replies with a smirk that sends shivers down my spine. Ever since I moved in, he’s gotten more and more flirty with me. I’m not sure if it’s just a change in his personality that he’s acquired in Los Angeles or if it’s something else, but it’s there. Not that I mind. Something has shifted in me too since we moved in together. It’s even gotten me thinking about removing rule number 6 from our pact. “Your turn, Ace,” I quickly change the subject, just so I don’t have to think about him like that too much. Our dynamic as best friends is too good to ruin it all. Twenty years of that is a long time to just throw away like that. “Alright, an easy one,” he says and simply starts stomping the bass pedal to activate his bass drum.  It’s a slow, almost menacing thump that sounds very familiar. A little too familiar. “Oh, I need you more than words can say Oh, You saved me in ways I can’t explain Always been there for me, now I’ll do the same Oh, I need you more than words can say” It’s one of the two songs on Little Mix’s last album that I helped write. The song that means most to me since I wrote it with Owen in mind. It was a period of time where all I wanted was to see Owen and be able to talk to him and just spend time with him like we used to before his whole acting adventure. I think he’ll stop after the chorus, but instead, he picks up his drum sticks and starts playing the rest of the song on his drum kit. Deciding it could be a fun jam session, I start playing the chords on my guitar as well whilst continuing with the lyrics. “Won't forget, won't forget Won't forget when he broke my heart How you helped me through You turned, you turned, you turned a disaster into a dream Gave me the power, made my life brand new When the world try to break us, we found magic And we grew stronger, though every line, line, line Every night, every night, every night I strain and sing the truth Now, now they know that they gonna be alright, alright” The memories of when I wrote this song start slipping through my mind. I remember how alone I felt, even in a room with a dozen other people. I remember how much I missed Owen. “I find peace in every story you told I think of you, I'll never be alone It's true, true, true You know I do, do, do” My eyes lock with Owen for a moment. He shoots me a comforting smile that makes me feel right at home. And I don’t mean here. I mean home as in Norman, Oklahoma. “Oh, I need you more than words can say Oh, you save me in ways that I can't explain Always been there for me, now I'll do the same Oh, I need you more than words can say Oh, I need you more than words can say” We both stop playing and just look at each other for a while. I’ve never told Owen I wrote this song for him, but at the same time, I think he might already know. That doesn’t take away the urge to tell him though. “I wrote that about you when I missed you,” I blurt out without properly thinking about it. “Really?” he asks while coming out from behind his kit. Combing his long, blonde hair back, he makes his way over to me and grabs the guitar from my lap. “Yeah, I thought you’d know?” He chuckles, shaking his head whilst tickling the strings. I’d taught him a couple of songs on the guitar since we started living together. “You write with a lot of people, Nugget. Could’ve just been their words as well....” He isn’t wrong about that. Maybe it was a lot less obvious than I thought it was. “So, what are the guidelines for this one?” he questions. I grab my notebook again and open it on the page I was working on before he fluttered into the studio. “They didn’t want another pop song. Kind of more like a ‘fuck you’ to Simon Cowell for treating them so badly and telling them what to do and what to wear and whatnot,” I explain, showing the few lines I have already. Some of them Jade had sent me, others were Perrie’s, a couple were mine. “What are most pop songs about?” Owen queries. I know he’s trying to help me, but he’s kind of making me nervous with the constant strumming of the guitar. “Songs about falling in love, or drinks and drugs…” I sum up at the top of my mind, “Or heartbreak…” Owen nods his head whilst continuing to play the same few chords over and over again. I focus on the melody for a moment as my creative juices start to work again. “This ain’t another pop song ‘bout falling in love Or a party song ‘bout drinks and drugs No more singing songs ‘bout breaking my heart And my lonely nights dancin’ in the dark” I look up at Owen for validation. Nodding his head encouragingly, he keeps playing the same few chords but a little louder this time to support the flow of my lyrics. “If I’m a guilty pleasure I want this life forever I’ll take it all ‘cause anything is better Than another pop song ‘bout falling in love But if you wanna sing along say ‘I don’t give a fuck!’” Owen starts jumping around excitedly, and I can’t help but laugh at his adorableness. He used to get this excited whenever I sent him a demo of the songs I was working on. “Let’s record a demo!” he exclaims and, after handing me my guitar back, moves towards the recording equipment. “Let’s start with some guitar,” he says and that’s how our recording starts. First, the guitar, then Owen records some drums, and then I get behind the mic to sing the song all by myself. I can just imagine how amazing this’ll sound with the girls’ voices instead of mine. “No broken bottles Or glitter on the floor form the night before Ain’t no boy troubles If that’s what you came here for then you should know” I lapse back into the chorus one last time before we finish recording and put everything together. We listen to it a couple more times before sending it over to Little Mix and their management. Awaiting their answer, we head into the kitchen to make some dinner together. It only takes about half an hour before I get a call from Jade. “This song is epic!” she shouts into my ear before I can even say hello. “Exactly what we needed, Y/N, thank you so much!” I’ve grown accustomed to her thick Geordie accent, though it was hard to understand in the beginning. “Thanks, Jade! Owen helped me out a little,” I reply, looking up at Owen himself who shoots me a wink that sends a rush of heat from my head all the way to my toes. The girls all know about Owen. I’d told them about my best friend and how supportive he was, and they always teased me saying I was so in love with this guy. Which I didn’t realize at the time and always denied. Rule 6 clearly states no dating each other. “Give him a big snog as a thanks then!” Jade jokes, and I can even hear the others in the background. “I’m on Zoom with the girls at the moment. They say hi!” “Hi back!” I can’t stop the giggle from escaping from my lips. “I gotta go, Jade. Thanks for getting back to me about the song. I can’t wait to hear you guys singing it!” Jade snickers on the other side of the line. All while I’m watching Owen make some pasta at the stove. There’s something so attractive about him in the kitchen, I’m not sure what it is. Fuck, Jade is right. I am very much in love with my best friend and there’s nothing I’m going to be able to do about it. Stupid pact we made in the first grade. “We’ll call you later to discuss some more arrangements and stuff. Bye, Y/N!” “Bye, Jade! Bye girls!” I say loudly, knowing I’m probably on speaker phone anyway. “Bye, Y/N!” the girls chorus. I hang up the phone and look at Owen for a few seconds before bursting out into an excited cheer, dancing my way towards him. “They loved it! They loved it! They loved it!” I shout loudly, and cup Owen’s face in my hands before pressing my lips to his in an outburst of elation. I’m surprising yourself at first, but then melt into the familiarity of his embrace as his arms snake around my waist whilst kissing me back. He’s actually kissing me back. “And that’s rule number 6 out the door…” Owen mumbles when he pulls away. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have,” I mumble and step away from him, or at least try to. His arms tighten around my waist, restricting me from taking another step. “I’ve been thinking about talking to you about that stupid rule, Nugget. I’ve hated it ever since we were 16.” My eyes widen at his confession. Since we were sixteen? SIXTEEN? That’s four years ago. That’s even long before I realized I felt more for him than just a platonic love. “16? Why didn’t you say anything?!” Owen chuckles, retracting his arms from around my waist and instead tucking a strand of hair behind my ear before placing his hand on my cheek. “You were pretty enamoured with Ryan, remember?” My heart breaks at the mention of the prick’s name. Ryan was my very first heartbreak and the worst at that. Owen was in LA at the time, but when he heard the news, he almost immediately flew back to Norman Oklahoma to comfort me and eat ice cream together. “Besides, I was constantly on the move from LA to Norman, it wouldn’t have been fair to you…” “You’re the sweetest human being alive, Owen Patrick Joyner,” I tell him with a smile tugging at my lips, but then turn serious again as I flick his forehead. He lets out an ‘ow’ and shoots me a confused glare. “And the stupidest! I’ve been in love with you since I don’t know when, but I never realized until now! The girls from Little Mix even knew but I was too oblivious or stubborn to see it myself. If you’d told me, I probably would’ve realized sooner!” “Well… I told you now?” he tries, the cheesiest smile on his face that makes me roll my eyes. “I love you, Ace,” I whisper, “And not the platonic kind this time.” “I love you too, Nugget.” He leans down again after that, reconnecting our lips into a passionate kiss. The first of many. This ought to be a very interesting quarantine together.

Taglist: @hannahhistorian92 @marinettepotterandplagg @thequirkybookaholic @bookdealer5 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @hemmingsness @iainttakingshitfromnobody @ifilwtmfc @angryknightstatesmantrash @kiss-themoongoodbye @rudysbay @thedarkqueenofavalon​ @caitsymichelle13​ @calamitykaty @wiselight @kcd15​

Lemme know if you wanna be on my taglist! 

[scenics]

what's your favorite thing about wong kar wai's movies? why do you like his movies so much?

wrote this in the notes app at 3am. this got very long. wkw’s one of my fave directors of all time

first of all, i did not like wong kar wai’s movies growing up. my first introduction to wong kar wai was with in the mood for love, and i always hated how slow the movie was—i could not understand the value of two middle aged people walking circles around each other on when i was eight years old. my mother was particularly fascinated with the movie and every few years or so she’d borrow it from the local library just to rewatch it by herself, or with me as an unwilling audience. maybe she just really liked tony leung like everyone else did, or i didn’t understand what she was going through back then. now, she watches it a lot less, but ironically i’m the one who watches it on a regular basis. when i look back, i realize my hatred of in the mood for love stemmed from my rejection of my mother when i was younger, along with anything related to my culture/heritage. it was my way of reconciling the isolation i felt in my new home at a young age—i thought that rejecting any part of my past would allow me to assimilate better (and for the most part it worked until senior year of high school give or take). i can say now that my former hatred/rejection of wong kar wai’s greatest work—his magnum opus—makes me appreciate him a lot more. like my mother taught me, it is best not to hate if you can love one day.

my real love and fascination for wong kar wai started when i was 18. the week after my first week of college finals, i watched his entire filmography (excluding anything post 2046) in one long sitting. i was exhausted from an accumulation of things: college did not go the way i expected and i hated science with a passionate sincerity by the end of the year. that year, i had also not chosen to go home.  regretted not just going back to vietnam a lot and i spent the entire first year of college just missing it. i was mentally emotionally exhausted and homesick so i found immediate comfort and familiarity in wong kar wai’s films. all of wong kar wai’s films are based around the simple theme of connection, each character desires connection with another —whether through strangers like in chungking express or estranged lovers in a foreign city like in happy together. every character is lost in their own world of loneliness, but they’re not consumed by it as they constantly venture out to find a cure for their loneliness. there’s a sort of warm tenderness to their eternal loneliness. wong kar wai’s characters are all very simple, but that just makes them the more normal. he adds an amusing, yet charming aspect to a lot of his characters, which makes them all the more real. at the end of the day, they’re the most ordinary of people, but framed in wong kar wai’s romantic vision of the world. for me, i can see myself in a lot of his characters, especially as i’ve now settled myself into my twenties.

most of all, wong kar wai’s movies remind me of home a lot. more than anything. vietnamese cinema barely exists, and his films of hong kong are one of the only threads of my childhood memories captured in film. in his films, his characters loneliness stems from an urban isolation and a desire to find home. how can one constantly be surrounded by people, yet feel so lonely?  90s hong kong reminds me a lot of early 2000s saigon, right before true modern urbanization began to take foot. the saigon i return to now is not the place i grew up in, everything i once knew with familiarity has become foreign (you could argue the same for hong kong too). like both the main characters in happy together, i’m very much far away from home now, but what makes it worse is i don’t have a home to return to anymore despite it still being there. the isolation i feel here is much less comforting than the familiar isolation of asia, it’s an entirely distinct feeling i’ve come to differentiate. the night version of hong kong in fallen angels reminds me very much of saigon at night when i was little—when i would cling to my aunts back on the motorcycle. even more, hong kong at night is an unmistakable feeling—a true moment of limbo that you can experience nowhere else as the city seems to slow to a stop before starting up again (the dim sum scene in fallen angels reminds me of my uncle taking me with him to smalls shops buried deep in hong kong’s markets. in my opinion, the most crowded, dirty, loud places have the best food).

one of the things i also love the most about wong kar wais films are they are essentially “of an era.” context heavily influences his films, and watchers should understand that his best films are primarily made in the decade of hong kong’s handover from the uk to china.  looking back now, his films are representative of the end of hong kong pop culture culture. they’re the last threads of a former culture powerhouse in asia—hk cantopop, film, and tv throughout the late 70s to 90s had an immense influence on asian pop culture today. everybody knew and loved hong kong, because it was the only true source of quality pop culture in an age of barely any in asia. hong kong was the beginning of everything essentially. kpop even, i would argue, would not be what it is today without cantopop—many idols are modeled after the cantopop idols of the 80s along with western influence. it’s sad to see that hong kong’s impact has been increasingly erased over the past 20 or so years—hong kong is now a shell of it’s former self as it can never return to its former glory. wong kar wai’s greatest films are chungking express, fallen angels, happy together, and in the mood for love. they’re all made in the years predating or after the handover, and you can see the differences in feeling of each film as it nears 1997. happy together, aside from being a somewhat tragic love story, is also the tragedy of hong kong. the handover of 1997 seems to haunt that film as the characters are also far way from hong kong; they’re on the other side of the world. there’s a sense of fear and desperation that runs parallel to the main love story and i feel like people don’t see that the first time without an understanding of historical context. chungking express and fallen angels are two sides of hong kong—hong kong by day and by night—they’re wong kar wai’s love letter to hong kong itself before it disappears in the subsequent years (which it has sadly). both of those movies are time capsules of an era, they capture an atmosphere that is now gone in hong kong. 2046 is an extension of those four movies above—an imagining of how hong kong would be be 99 years after the “end” of hong kong as it is in 1997. and finally, wong kar wai’s greatest work is in the mood for love. it’s his magnum opus, and the true end of an era: for wong kar wai’s creative capacity, for hong kong pop culture, for the actors themselves. wong kar wai has been unable to follow in the mood for love successfully with other directorial features, it’s a masterpiece in itself in its inability for recreation. the movie speaks for itself, even maggie subsequently quit acting shortly afterwards because she felt she could never top that role—it was the end of her acting career in terms of era. everything that wong kar wai put out in the 90s is of an era, it cannot and never be repeated or recreated just as the old hong kong is gone (which is why his attempt to make sequels for those movies with blossoms and the chungking express sequel will be futile. wong kar wai does not realize that that era has indeed passed (and his his break up with christopher doyle has proved to be fatal for both of them).

finally, a small addition about wong kar wai as a director himself. he’s a cancer, very true to his nature, which explains how he can so fluidly translate and portray emotion in his films. they’re almost overflowing with tender emotion, but very much so in an implicit manner. i could never do that in anything i create, it’d end up being very much lynchian in manner, which makes me appreciate his films a lot more. moreover, wong kar wai has a certain way, an intimacy with all his actors. he brings out the best in them for only his movies, and that’s what makes him so special. also, i relate a lot to wong kar wai’s method of working ..the man is one of the worst procrastinators he’s worse than me. he almost never plans or writes scripts for his movies. most of his films especially in the 90s are very much “go with the flow” improvisation (u can see that the characters are very much the actors even it’s hard to distinguish). he was editing in the mood for love up to the last minute before final submission for cannes, that’s just how much of a procrastinator he was and why it’ll take him a million years to release the chungking express sequel. it’s amazing to think how all of these great movies from wong kar wai are technically equivalent to 2000 word essays submitted a minute past the deadline. what i imagine is how different would his work be if he’d planned ahead (how much better would my essays be if i didn’t write them at 3am?). but i guess we can all see how much he’s changed in the release of his criterion collection—-he’s not the person he once was and he can’t recreate the past.

if u read this far i love you thank u for reading my inarticulate nonsense thoughts. i hope u like wong kar wai a lot more than before

[rintheyordle]

Writing/RP Prompts!

Here’s one to start! Linked to me by a friend, so I copy pasta’d from reddit! (THANK YOU JACKALOPPY!): 

Pick a number between 1 and 100, and I’ll write either a snippet or response to it as my OC! (BONUS: Ask it as your own OC and I’ll make a little dialog :D)

This is a pretty big list of 100 prompts, so PLEASE CHECK UNDER THE READ-MORE TO SEE IT ALL! Or you can just ask a random question and I’ll go find it. Oooooo RNG!!!

01: If your character wasn’t an adventurer, what livelihood would they lead?

02: Who in the party would your character trust the most with their life?

03: What are your character’s core moral beliefs?

04: What relationship does your character have with their parents and siblings?

05: Does your character have any biases for or against certain races?

06: What is your character’s opinion on nobility? On authority?

07: Describe your character’s current appearance: clothes, armor, scars they’ve picked up along the journey, etc.

08: What location encountered in the campaign has your character felt the most “at home” in, or just generally liked the most?

09: What deity, if any, does your character worship? What’s their opinion on other people’s worship?

10: If your character had time to pick up any artisan’s tools, game set, instrument, etc., what would it be?

11: Describe your character’s current relationship with the player character sitting to your right.

12: What is your character’s current goal, summed up in one sentence?

13: Does your character ever want to “settle down” with a spouse, children, house, etc.?

14: Has your character ever been in love?

15: What battle in the campaign has been most memorable to your character?

16: If your character wasn’t whatever class they are, what would they be instead?

17: What is your character’s favorite season?

18: What would your character’s Zodiac sign be, following stereotypical astrology?

19: Where in the world does your character most want to visit?

20: What is the biggest mistake your character has ever made?

21: Does your character have any noticeable scars? If so, what are their stories?

22: What animal best represents your character?

23: If your character could go back in time and change one thing about their life, what would it be?

24: Which other player character does your character find themselves having the most in common with?

25: Does your character regret any particular choice the party has made?

26: What would your character say their best trait would be?

27: What is your character’s greatest fear? Deep, irrational?

28: What is currently motivating your character to stay with the party?

29: What are your character’s hobbies and interests outside of their class?

30: What would most people think when they first see your character?

31: What stereotypical group role does your character play in the party? (The Mom, the Mess, the Comic Relief, etc. Optionally: What role would your character play in the “Five Man Band” structure?)

32: What is your character the most insecure about?

33: What person does your character admire most?

34: What does your character admire and dislike the most about the player character sitting to your left?

35: Why is your character’s lowest stat their lowest (the in-character reason, not “because there’s no reason for a wizard to have 16 strength, duh”)?

36: What would be your character’s theme song/favorite band/favorite genre of music?

37: What stereotypical role would your character play in a high school AU/if they attended a normal high school? (Nerd, jock, bully, goth, etc.)

38: What treasure/item/artifact that your character has collected during the adventure is the most important to them?

39: Is there any particular weapon, item, etc. that your character longs to find?

40: Where does your character feel the most at home?

41: Does your character care about how they’re perceived by others? How do they change themselves to fit in with other people?

42: What does your character think is the true meaning of life?

43: What is your character’s scent? (Bonus points for a description that sounds like it could be from a bad [or awesome] fanfic.)

44: Does your character think more with their heart or their brain?

45: What is your character’s most recent or frequent nightmare?

46: What opinion does your character have on [CERTAIN ESTABLISHED GROUPS/AUTHORITIES IN THE GAME WORLD]? (Dragonmarked Houses, royal crown, etc.)

47: How did your character spend their childhood? Where did they grow up/who were their childhood friends?

48: What aspect of your character’s future are they most curious about? (If they could know one thing about the future, what would it be?)

49: What colors are associated with your character?

50: Who in the party would your character prioritize rescuing, in dire circumstances?

51: Is your character the most swayed by ethos, pathos, or logos?

52: If your character was granted a single use of Wish, what would they use it for?

53: What is your character’s favorite spell? If they don’t use spells: what is their favorite personal weapon/combat maneuver/skill/etc.?

54: How does your character feel about keeping secrets from the rest of the party?

55: What type of creature in the world is your character the most intrigued by?

56: When they were a child, what did your character want to be, or think they were going to be, when they grew up?

57: The player character to your left admits that they’re passionately in love with your character. How would your character respond?

58: If somebody (an NPC, someone from their backstory, etc.) your character trusts/loves asked your character to do something against the party’s best interest, who would they side with?

59: Does your character value their own best interest more than the party’s?

60: What decision would the party have to make in order for your character to consider splitting off from the group?

61: How does your character imagine the way they will die?

62: What is your character’s greatest achievement?

63: Is your character willing to risk the well-being of others in order to achieve their goal?

64: What is your character’s opinion on killing others?

65: What is your character’s favorite food? Beverage?

66: How generous is your character? Especially to those they don’t know?

67: What is your character the most envious about, regarding anyone in the party?

68: The player character to your left and the player character to your right are both telling your character two different versions of the truth. Who does your character believe?

69: What is your character’s sexuality/relationship with sex?

70: What is your character’s biggest pet peeve?

71: Describe how your character feels about the party’s current situation/objective/etc.

72: Who in the party would your character trust the most to keep an important secret?

73: If your character knew that they were going to die in a month, how would they spend the rest of their life?

74: What makes your character feel safe?

75: If your character had the chance to rename the party/give the party a name, no questions asked, what would it be?

76: What memory does your character want to forget the most?

77: If your character had to multiclass into a class they currently aren’t the next time they level up, what would it be and what reason would they have for doing so?

78: What television/book/video game/etc. character would your character be best friends with? (Or: what media character is your character the most influenced by/similar to?

79: What unusual talents does your character possess?

80: How does your character feel about receiving/giving orders? Are they more of a leader, or a follower?

81: What does your character’s name represent to them? (Or: why as a player did you choose your character’s name?)

82: Is your character more of an introvert, or an extrovert?

83: How far is your character willing to go to pursue the “greater good”? Do they believe in a greater good at all?

84: What does your character want to be remembered by?

85: What would be your character’s major in college?

86: Does your character consider themselves a hero, villain, or something else?

87: What major arcana tarot card best represents your character?

88: Where does your character see themselves in 20 years?

89: What is your character’s relationship with magic? Are they scared of it, wish to know more about it, indifferent to it?

90: Who is your character’s biggest rival?

91: What is your character’s guiltiest pleasure?

92: What does your character hope for the afterlife?

93: Who in the party does your character trust the least?

94: What is your character’s biggest flaw?

95: How did your character learn the languages that they speak?

96: What is your character’s favorite school of magic/type of weaponry?

97: What is most important to your character: health, wealth, or happiness?

98: What advice would your character give to a younger version of themselves?

99: Are there any social or political issues your character feels strongly about?

100: What, currently, is your character the most curious about?

[whattaloser]

Why I’m a Leftist

I know I’m probably just some dude who reblogs cool stuff to most of my followers but I’ve got a nice long story/rant about my political beliefs here that I’ve been wanting to write for awhile

I am a leftist first and foremost because I value human life. Everyone matters. No person is inherently more important than another person. Everyone has inherent rights that should not be infringed. People who infringe on other’s rights are morally wrong to do so. In essence my leftism is based on doing what is right. Obviously everyone has their own opinion on what is right but what is vitally important is knowing why your moral code is right. This is why so many people become liberals or conservatives or otherwise rather than leftists. They simply do not know enough about how the world works. There are a lot of reasons they don’t know, not the least of which is intentional covering up history and preventing education. I don’t believe people who aren’t leftists are stupid, but I do believe leftists know more. It’s kinda fucked up but it’s the only way you can explain inconsistencies in other’s values.

My path to leftism was full of cringe. When i was 7 years old Al Gore was running against George Bush for president. I did not know enough to have a real opinion on it but I am happy to say that I wanted Al Gore to win. This thought was based on very little if any logical reason. I basically flipped a coin in my head I think. Or maybe there was some outside influence that I wasn’t aware of, like my older sister who I looked up to might have said she liked Al gore. Either way, from then on I was in favor of democrats and did not like George Bush. When 9/11 happened I remembered thinking how dumb it was that people lined up around the block to get gas. Even as a child I knew that some buildings going down wasn’t going to end the great nation of the United States. In general I thought the United States was a great country. I knew from movies and tv as well as elementary school history that the United States was the most powerful country in the world. 

I recall in Sixth grade my teacher mentioned she liked George Bush because he was against gay marriage. Somehow at the time my opinion was the opposite despite being raised Catholic. I believed in god until I graduated high school and suddenly my desire to be religious slipped away and so did my belief. I do not consider this a great loss. 

Sometime in middle school or early high school I had solidified my opinion that the war in Iraq and Afghanistan was pointless and George Bush was a bad president. I was heavily influenced by movies and somewhat by video games that had imparted plenty of anti-war messages. Talks with my dad about nuclear missiles, watching History channel shows about world war 2, and playing Metal Gear Solid which had explicit nuclear disarmament messages, all informed me on the horrors of war. This was not enough to make me totally anti-military. In high school I wanted to join the military because I thought it was an easy way to get life experience and eventually pay for college. I was attracted to the Marines because of how cool movies like The Rock and video games like Call of Duty made it seem to be a Marine. I thought they were the best of the best. I was simultaneously against war, against veteran worship, and very pro-military. I was indoctrinated by years of government propaganda but also disillusioned by all forms of media including the book All Quiet on the Western Front which was about a soldier becoming disillusioned by witnessing horrors of war and the negative impact it had on everyone in his country. I spoke with a recruiter during my senior year and expressed my desire to be a Marine but I told him I wanted to wait a year after high school so I could get physically fit enough. The recruiter did not care that I was underweight and out of shape. He didn’t even care that I was very enthusiastic about joining, he was still putting on his best salesman demeanor which made me incredibly uneasy. The experience is supposed to pressure people into signing up on the spot, I think they even had forms for me to sign (i can’t really remember though) but I was not ready and was aware enough how I was being manipulated although not entirely cognizant. After that I no longer wanted to be in the military.

I also have to point out that I grew up in an unstable household. My parents were both loving but they were flawed and made mistakes and had problems. My dad was a typical Gen x man’s man. A little bit too emotionally repressed, but actually really good with kids when it came to play time and still is. He worked a lot because my mother couldn’t. My mother has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder as long as I can remember. Her medical bills related to her problems combined with other financially bad decisions by my parents caused my home life to be fraught. I lived in varying degrees of poverty until my parents separated and me and my siblings moved with my mother to her parents’ house away from my father. Prior to moving though, we endured great financial difficulty. We were unable to afford school lunches but could not apply for free or reduced lunches because technically my father made a lot of money, however it was all garnished for medical bills. My father always tells about how he bought a car that had hidden frame damage and when he attempted to sue the dealership for selling a bad car he lost and was garnished for that as well. Despite making over 25 dollars an hour in 1999, my father could not afford school lunches for three kids and couldn’t afford to pay the gas bill. Without going into too much more detail, life sucked and continued to suck until I graduated, at least financially. I still found plenty of joy and it wasn’t always that bad. We still found ways to have good things like video games and we could always rewatch old movies but there’s a lot of psychic weight that comes with being that poor as a child and I’m sure it affects me and my ability to empathize with others who in bad conditions. 

So i watched a lot of movies and documentaries, read a lot of books growing up, discovered internet forums at the age of 11, played video games, moved to a town that had a very large Hispanic population, and I even grew up poor. All of this life experience turned me into a very average liberal upon graduating high school. I was a very optimistic 18 year old. I thought science could save the world. If I was 18 today I would be an average redditor stereotype probably. The point here though is I still wasn’t a leftist. Only vaguely progressive and full of optimism. This is when I got sucked into the anti-feminist pipeline.

I can’t remember what exactly what I had going on in my life but I remember it was around the time of Gamergate. Everyone on the internet, celebrities, and pop culture were saying “if you believe in equality between genders you’re a feminist” an did not like that. And there was a ton of people online to tell me I was right in not liking that. They all said feminism was not necessary anymore because legally you couldn’t discriminate against women and I agreed. Gamergate made it worse for reasons too complicated to get into in this already long post but suffice it say I was “pro Gamergate.” This put me at odds with my closes friends who thought feminism was great and had no qualms with it, and were already embracing the idea of being a “social justice warrior.” Despite reading all kinds of anti-feminist think pieces and reveling in the discourse, I was still very progressive and liberal minded person. Still thought the military was bad, that black people were discriminated against etc. But so many aspects of anti-feminism were appealing to me as a white guy who tried their hardest to do what they’re told is right, had low self esteem, undiagnosed adhd and depression, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what feminism was. Two things got me out of anti-feminism though. The first and most important thing was having friends who were patient with me about it. I didn’t reveal how into anti-feminism I was because I was ashamed but they could sense it and pushed back when they could. The second thing that got me out of it was actually finding feminists online and reading what they had to say, staying away from poorly written clickbait articles that fueled misogynist tirades against feminism. After reading and learning from feminists it finally clicked. Our society is patriarchal and that affects how people interact with each other regardless of what is legal. Many of the complaints of anti-feminism talk about how men have it in society, so how can society be patriarchal. It’s because of patriarchy that men are put in bad positions. Some of the more self aware anti-feminists had retorts against these ideas but they were emotionally charged. There’s still some anti-feminists I have respect for because of how well prepared and logical they were when it came to disputing feminism. But when it came down to the fundamental tenants of feminsim all they could respond with was anger or outright denial of reality. (If you’re like I was and don’t understand how anyone can thing modern feminism is good please feel free to ask me more, I just can’t get into specifics in this long ass post) Anyways, once you understand patriarchy and how it affects an individuals actions then you can start seeing how other institutions and cultural norms can affect an individual. This is basically fundamentals of leftism. I’d say about 90% of my path to leftism was just naturally absorbing cultural and historical information through consumption of media. The most conservative people I know are people who haven’t read very many books or seen very many movies. I’m not saying watching Austin Powers at the age of 10 will make everyone a leftist but constantly recontextualizing the world by learning something new, even if you learned it from some dumb comedy movie, can give you better grounding in a shared reality.  Don’t know how to end this but I want to say when I was a teenager I thought “communism is good in theory but it doesn’t work in practice” and I had almost no historical basis for it other than the vague notion that USSR = bad despite having consumed a massive amount of media. None of it taught me what communism actually was, I didn’t know who Karl Marx was, and I had no clue why communism in the USSR failed. You can know a lot without knowing the truth so if you’re struggling with a loved one who is mind poisoned by conservative keep in mind that they know a lot but they’re missing something important to give clarity. 

This has been my Ted Talk

[fortylessonsbeforeforty]

Lesson 30

I learnt the importance of being unapologetically ME! I read a quote recently that said something along the lines of that in life we aren’t finding ourselves, we are becoming ourselves, which I loved, but at the same time didn’t entirely agree with. For me, I think sometimes in life, we do get lost. Lost in the expectations of others that we think we ought to be living up to. Lost when we are in different relationships, personally and professionally. And at times we need to rediscover ourselves, which I understand in a sense is how we become our authentic self. For me, turning thirty was a defining point in my life where I first remember I truly felt I was ME!

I saw a psychic medium in my late twenties and one thing that really hit home for me, was when she suggested I needed to release the self-made guilt, responsibility and loyalty. She told me to release old ways of doing things — old ideas, beliefs and notions. It made me reflect on the person I was and the decisions I was making in life; whether or not they were for me or to please the people around me. I came to see that the ‘plan’ I had for my life was created based on the ideas and beliefs of others and what society said was ‘normal.’ The greatest internal battle was the desire to be who I wanted to be and who I knew I was versus who I thought my family, friends and society told me I should be.

This realisation that I was living a life for others and not completely for myself wasn’t entirely a bad thing. I realise now, that some of my best qualities and characteristics have been shaped by my family and loved ones. I had to reconcile the idea of who I wanted to be with the person (I thought) others wanted me to be and ensure I wasn’t compromising me in the equation. In an episode of ‘The Secret Life Of Us,’ Dr Alex Christensen returns to her high school to speak to current students. She explains the weird feeling she got when she was called ‘Doctor’ for the first time and how she hadn’t yet seen herself as a doctor. She said:

“I understood that people were seeing me from a different perspective from the way that I’d always seen myself. And so, in a way, I had to rethink my own view of myself. It’s a critical moment for us all. But what’s more important, I believe, is how we use this realisation. When we understand this, when we embrace all our contradictions, only then are we equipped, fully equipped to find our true place in the world.”

After seeing the psychic medium, I felt a confidence to embrace the contradictions of who I was, rather than feel ashamed and hide them. For so long I had felt afraid to express certain parts of me, for fear of people not being accepting of who I was. This in turn made it hard for me to like the person I was, because it was a person I was pretending to be. Savage Garden’s song ‘This Side Of Me,’ explores this idea of wanting to showing one’s true self. Darren Hayes sings:

And in the dark I want to find that golden glow within

’Cause I am not afraid to let you see this side of me

It was after seeing the psychic and turning thirty that I feel I began to take steps towards truly becoming happy with who I was and the me I wanted to be and have people see. I began the work of getting to know the me I wanted to be and letting that side of me shine.

When studying to become a teacher, it’s made clear that you need to be very reflective. It’s drummed into you that you need to be reflective at the end of each lesson, of your teaching style, your behaviour management, how you set up the room, the list is endless. I have no doubt that reflection is a natural part of all professions, but it’s showed me the importance of using this skill in all aspects of who I am, not just the teacher in the classroom. If we aren’t reflective, we can’t grow. David Chang discusses the importance of self-reflection in his memoir, ‘Eat A Peach,’ using the analogy of a lobster. He says:

“There’s an old myth that lobsters are immortal. They never show signs of getting old. They don’t slow down until they day they’re cooked and eaten. Lobsters grow by molting. They shed their old shell to reveal a new, soft shell that will eventually harden around them. By the time they’re done, there’s no sign of the lobster they were. It’s an exhausting, dangerous process. It takes a tremendous amount of energy and leaves them exposed and vulnerable while they’re in the middle of it. Want to know the only sign a lobster is dying? It stops molting. Never again would we fear the gruelling work of breaking ourselves down and gluing ourselves back together again. That cycle of building and destroying and rebuilding is not something to overcome. The human equivalent of not wanting to molt is trying to make life easy, refusing to grow or be self-reflective.”

Sometimes we are forced into situations that allow us the time and space to look inward to ask ourselves if we are on the right path. The global pandemic has been one of those times that has allowed us the opportunity to do so. No matter where we are in the world, Covid-19 has had an impact on us, some more so than others. I really enjoyed the conversation between @taylorswift and Jack Antonoff as they discussed recording ‘folklore’ during this period of time. Jack said:

“In our dismantling of all our systems of life that we’ve known in the pandemic we’re left with two options. Either cling to it and make it work of just say “Ok, I guess I’m gonna turn a new path and get a frontier mentality. Everything’s a blur so I’m just gonna rewrite it.”

I know for me it was a great opportunity to think about what was important to me and what I could leave behind. Letting go of all those things that weren’t contributing positively and productively to the person I aim to be. It made me think about how I spend my time and the notion that I had to ‘use up’ my whole weekend seeing people and doing things, otherwise it was a wasted two days. It made me realise the importance of prioritising the things I love and how it’s more about quality over quantity. It’s a sentiment that @taylornation reflected on with Jack, saying:

“There’s something about the complete and total uncertainty of life that causes endless anxiety, but there’s another part the release of pressures you used to feel. Because if we’re going to have to recalibrate everything, we should start with what we love the most first.”

It reminded me that in times of any disaster, whether it’s a global pandemic, a health scare, losing a job or the breakdown of a relationship, the importance in taking the time to discover who you are. Finding yourself in order to become who you want to be. And sometimes that may take time, as Taylor Swift sings in ‘happiness’:

And in the disbelief I can’t face reinvention I haven’t met the new me yet

It may take some time to find the new person you want to become after a disaster. Similarly, we can find ourselves changed in the blink of an eye after a completely unexpected event. Things happen that will change us and Katharine McPhee’s song ‘Stranger Than Fiction’ is a good reminder of that.

I found love when I least expected it I found faith from a night of no regrets I found me in a place too crazy to mention Let’s say that life is stranger than fiction

I found love from the strength of letting go I found faith from the nights spent on my own I found me in a place too crazy to mention Let’s say that life is stranger than fiction

Another thing that I’ve learnt is to be open to all experiences and how they might influence and change us. Never be so rigid in our own mindset, that the things around us could change us for the better. It’s one of the things I love most about travelling, especially when I go outside of my comfort zone, travelling alone. I know for a fact that part of who I am today, I’ve become because of the people and places I’ve met on my many overseas adventures, especially those unplanned moments where a crazy chance of coincidence lands you in the right place at the right time with the right person.

Sometimes the circumstances of life, will force you into situations where you begin to forget who you are and the person staring back at you in the mirror is unrecognizable. In the musical ‘Waitress,’ the protagonist, Jenna comes to the realisation she has ended up in a life, not of her choosing. She sings in ‘She Used To Be Mine’:

It’s not what I asked for Sometimes life just slips in through a back door And carves out a person And makes you believe it’s all true

It’s easy to believe sometimes we are the person based on the circumstances life lands us in. I love the quote, “Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.” We don’t have to be defined by the failures we’ve faced, the health diagnosis we’ve been given. We choose who we want to be. I love Jenna’s epiphany in the song where she is determined to make a change for herself.

And you’re not what I asked for If I’m honest I know I would give it all back For a chance to start over And rewrite an ending or two For the girl that I knew

We will inevitably face people who will try to tell us who they think we are or should be, based on information they’ve heard (whether it’s true or baseless rumours). They’ll make assumptions about us before they even know us. We have no control over the version of ‘us’ that other people choose to see us as, because the truth is, we only ever know the version of a person that they chose to show us. At the end of the day, we should not put too much time and effort into the thoughts and opinions others have of us. I’ve always loved the saying “Lions don’t lose sleep over opinions of sheep.” Billie Eilish reflects on this very thing in her song, ‘Not My Reponsibility’:

Who decides what that makes me, what that means? Is my value based only on your perception? Or is your opinion of me not my responsibility?

I’ve learnt to drop any mask that I’ve worn, choosing to be unapologetically me. What you see is what you get. And if you don’t like it, you don’t have to be around me. I’ve come to really LOVE ME! I’ve seen different variations of self-love quotes over the years and have remixed my own that I’ve used in countless pep talks to students, colleagues, family and friends over the years.

“The one person that you will spend your entire life with, is yourself. So you better love yourself as much as you can.”

So whether you are finding yourself or becoming yourself, the most important thing I’ve learnt is to base it on what you love. We attract what we are, so it makes sense to embrace the things we love and let go of the nuanced complexities we create to fit into different groups we think are cool or popular, but just aren’t us. In the closing words of Taylor Swift’s song ‘Daylight,’ which closes the ‘Lover’ album:

I wanna be defined by the things that I love Not the things I hate Not the things that I’m afraid of, I’m afraid of Not the things that haunt me in the middle of the night I, I just think that You are what you love

[williamismyhomeboy]

Interview on www.quitmyscene.com March 30th 2005

Interviewer: Cassidy Myers Interviewee: William of The Academy Is... Date of interview: March 30, 2005 Cassidy: So first off how has the tour been going with Fall Out Boy? William: The tour has been spectacular. It’s our first tour were our record is out. So, it’s been our first real look at how our record is going to come out, you know? And its been magical. In just a short period of time. It’s been great. C: How did deal come along with Fueled By Ramen? W: Well we had an EP and we just started playing local shows in Chicago and we had a couple new demos. We kind of revaluated our songwriting process, like how we are going to move forward, and not be counterproductive, and actually have a focus. We were always friends with Fall Out Boy Growing up and Pete the bass player liked us a lot and he told John Janick that is head of Fueled By Ramen and he got him to come check us out. So, he flew up, at the time Mike and I were living in an apartment together writing the record for out friends Tony and Johnny. He came up and stayed in our apartment for like three days, up to like three in the morning every night, talking about music, talking about our future, showing him some new stuff. At that point it was just all big dreams, no songs written, and it couldn’t have worked out better, he believes in us and signed up with a real simple deal and you know, here we are.

C: So why the name change from The Academy To The Academy Is...? W: Well, obviously we were originally named The Academy. Right after our EP came out we ran into some legal problems, with other artists or organizations called The Academy or Academy. So, basically we had everything worked out, we where going to keep the name, but there was this rock singer from like the 60’s or 70’s, who was only released in Great Britain, but he went under the name The Academy. But, we couldn’t get a hold of him or any label of his, so instead of risking that, plus with all these other legal sharks around us, we figured we could just get out of the water. We wanted to change it to something very subtle, but you have to understand at the time we were changing our sound, we were changing the way we where going to write songs for now on. That’s where we were at the same juncture, but we didn’t want to alienate the people that saw us spring up. Our local following, we didn’t want to alienate those people saying that, “We changed our name and we changed our sound.” So, we just changed it very subtlety and I think it is just very open ended and it is what it is, its means whatever you want it to mean. C: So the song "Black Mamba" is about the horrible reviews you guys got by critics from the EP, so was the song kind of your way to get back at the critics? W: “Black Mamba” isn’t just a middle finger to critics. “Black Mamba” is a lot different, it’s about our focus, and it’s like telling people our focus isn’t about Rolling Stones or any critic thinks about our music. If they love it, great, if the don’t, great. That’s America, we’re all entitled to our opinions and that’s what is beautiful about it. But as far as art goes, I believe what we are doing is art and art is so subjective, how can you really judge it that intensely? Being so ignorant and not knowing anything about it. For us it was focusing on this song is for people, this music is for people, and this record is for people. It’s not for some guy in a suit, well it is for some guy in a suit, but it’s not about we he thinks about it, it’s not about the credibility. It’s for people thinking for themselves and making their own decisions and just loving music. C: When you were presented with the chance to play music for a living was it an easy choice or a gamble that you got lucky on? W: None of us, was presented with that, here go play music for the rest of your life, it will be simple, here you go, you know? This is how I started it, like when I was a senior in high school, I decided I wanted to do music, I want to perform. I still had a solo project back then and I just fell in love with performing. That was just me and an acoustic guitar and singing on a stole. I fell in love with that, I fell in love with writing with song writing, I fell in love with the music. So, I knew I wanted to do it, for me it was a really hard decision because at that point everything for the past 11 years of my life was all devoted to school and academics and education. My future was going to start after college, I was going to do what a lot of people do and for me I value education to no end, but that’s not where my heart said and my heart said music, so that’s what I got to do. So, I graduated a semester early and I went on tour right away. If it was like my dads mini-van or me, my guitar and me best friend in the world, Johnny Minardi and we just went and booked our own tour on the east coast through the biggest snow storm of the past decade. It was like really dangerous, but it was really great and that’s how I started. It was a decision, it wasn’t a presentation and that’s how it goes for all of us. We had to really work for that opportunity. It was a conscience decision.

C: Do you miss playing solo as Remember Maine and will Remember Main ever making a comeback? W: Thank you for knowing about that. It seems like people out here [in Seattle, WA] actually know about it, like someone was yelling it out in the crowd today and I was like what? It is always wild. I love performing solo and I’m not thinking about music and this project and that project, I’m thinking about it as my creative release and what I do as my release. Am I going to record under the name Remember Maine anymore? I don’t know, maybe. Am I going to perform stuff of my own? Everyday. I don’t know, we’ll have to see, all I know its going to be a really long future of songwriting whether if it’s with me or this band.

C: What do you think about the RIAA still suing kids for downloading music to this day? W: While I found out a lot of the bands I love through downloads through like mp3.com or purevolume. There’s that and I think that’s the right way to go, there doing it the right way, purevolume and mp3.com, are doing it the right way, but these other guys like Kazza and Napster, aren’t doing it the right way and it is stealing music. It’s like stealing paintings off a museum wall, it takes away everything rock and roll is about, like going to the record store and coming home like “Now I’m broke, but I spent all my money on these records that are going to change my life,” for me it just doesn’t make sense, but for young people who are just are coming up in this new generation of music and the way it is socially accepted, like how it goes about. That’s all they know, they don’t know about buying records. That’s what we are trying to do and what record labels are trying to do is cracking down on this. Like they don’t see as big as turn like they did in the 90’s because everyone is burning CDs, no ones making any money, so how are going to have rock and roll bands that are going to change the world if labels can’t stick around long enough to build a career for them. So, for me I’m a supporter. C: What have you been listening to lately? W: Well, I listen to tons of Jon Lennon “legend” that record. Don Henley’s greatest hits, he wrote so many hits it’s beyond belief. A lot of Simon and Garfunkel, the new Kings of Leon record, is so good, if you haven’t picked it up, pick it up, it’s really, really good, it’s rock and roll. Listening to a lot of old David Bowie. Listening to Peter Gabriel. That’s pretty much what I have on rotation. C: Anything else you would like to say? W: Check out our record, our website is theacademyis.com, go there and see where we are going to be around in your city. Thank you so much.

[keyofjetwolf]

THE GIFTENING 2019: Jet Wolf’s Nomination Run-down

Last year, people said they would have liked to know which of the nominations I’d seen, or knew about, or liked, or didn’t like, etc. etc. I HEAR YOU. Under the cut, you’ll find all the nominees in every relevant category (anime, non-anime animated, live action, movies, games), and a couple of brief notes on my familiarity (or lack thereof) and general feelings on the thing.

YOU NEED NOT CONSIDER ANY OF THIS BEFORE MAKING YOUR VOTES

I’m putting the info out there for those who’ve wanted to know, but that information is relevant precisely as much as you want it to be. I can and will liveblog something I hate, I can play a game I’ve played twenty times before. THE GIFTENING is for you, and while I won’t lie (I won’t pretend to like something I don’t, I won’t feign surprise at a twist on my 21st playthrough), I’ll happily provide whatever entertainment in whatever way I can.

Also please note that if I don’t like something, that feeling comes with no value judgement. My disliking a thing reflects only on myself. So if you see I’m not a fan of something, or don’t think I’ll like it based on what I’ve seen or heard, please keep in mind there’s nothing personal toward in you at all in that. AND HELL I COULD BE WRONG FEEL FREE TO TRY AND SHOW ME

Anyway, enough with the blah blah. Join me under the cut if you care to know!

Anything marked only with ** means I haven’t seen/played it nor have any particular thoughts or opinions to share.

Anime

.hack//Sign  **

A Place Further Than The Universe - Haven’t seen it, but from Dashboard Osmosis, was more interested in it than I have been a non-Sailor Moon anime in a long time.

Aggretsuko  **

Aikatsu!  **

Alien Nine  **

Angel Sanctuary  **

Aria the Animation  ** 

Assassination Classroom  ** 

Azumanga Daioh  **

Bodacious Space Pirates - Saw through the first couple of episodes (liveblog here!) Not sure where it’s going, but liked it pretty well!

Bubblegum Crisis - An old personal favourite

Clannad  ** 

Death Note - I think it’s about killing people with a slam book I DUNNO

Death Parade  ** 

Diebuster  ** 

Erased (Boku Dake Ga Inai Machi)  **

Excel Saga  **

Fate/Grand Order: Babylonia  **

Fate/Grand Order: First Order  **

Fire Force  **

Free! Iwatobi Swim Club - I’ve watched the first series. It’s okay, WOULD BE BETTER IF NOT SO MANY DUDES

Fresh Precure - I’ve not seen any Precure series, but if pressed, would say it appears overwhelmingly fluffy and saccharine

Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood - a GIFTENING favourite! Barely into it, but enjoying so far. (previous liveblog here)

Fushigi Yuugi - I watched the series (quit partway through the OAVs) when I finished Sailor Moon back in the day and desperately wanted to find it again. I failed.

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun  ** 

Given  ** 

Glitter Force  ** 

Grave of the Fireflies - NEVER SEEN IT HAVE BEEN INFORMED IT WILL DEVASTATE ME

Haibane Renmei - I know only what I’ve read via Holligay’s liveblogs! (find them here)

Hamtaro - uhm isn’t this about a hamster

Higurashi When They Cry  ** 

Houseki no Kuni (Land of the Lustrous)  ** 

Hugtto! Precure - See note on previous Precure

Hyouka  ** 

Kaguya-sama: Love is War  **

Kaleido Star  **

Kemono Friends  **

Kimetsu no Yaiba  **

Little Witch Academia  **

Log Horizon  **

Love Hina  **

Luck & Logic  **

Madoka: Rebellion - I saw the Madoka series (fairly ambivalent to it), and heard the movie was terrible, but no clue why, specifically.

Magic Knight Rayearth - Watched this back in the day and haven’t watched a single second since. I REMEMBER LIKING THE BLUE ONE

Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha - Someone sponsored this liveblog for a while! (liveblog here) It was doing some really interesting things with kids burdened with all this world-saving shit, I thought.

Magical Girl Pretty Sammy (TV not OAV) - I know this is a Tenchi Muyo! spin-off (watched some Tenchi back in the day), but I’ve never seen it. Magical Girl Raising Project - Seen the whole series, and really quite enjoyed it.

March Comes in Like a Lion (3-gatsu no Lion)  **

Megalobox  **

Mirai Nikki (The Future Diary)  **

Mob Psycho 100 - Never seen it, but know a bit about it through Dashboard Osmosis.

Mobile Suit Gundam (1979) - WOW WE’RE GOING BACK INTO THE OLDEN TIMES. I’ve seen bits and pieces of *A* Gundam, but no idea which.

Moribito  **

My Bride is a Mermaid (Seto No Hanayome)  ** 

My Roommate is a Cat - Never heard of it, love the title, want it to be a series mashed with the one above.

NANA

Natsume's Book of Friends - I’ve heard the title enough to have it ring a bell, but know nothing otherwise.

Neon Genesis Evangelion - I FUCKING HATE EVANGELION I SEE YOU HOLLIGAY

O Maidens in Your Savage Season - This is another banger title, never heard of it.

Ojamajo Doremi  **

Pretear

Princess Principal

Princess Tutu - WE’RE OLD FRIENDS TUTU AND I. I’m currently liveblogging Princess Tutu on the regular thanks to Calantian! (liveblog here) I just got to the halfway point of episode 12, and have Tutu on the schedule for January as well. LOVING THIS SHOW.

Project A-Ko - Among my earliest of anime experiences. A classic. A weird, weird little classic.

Re:Creators  ** 

Read or Die (OAV)  ** 

Revolutionary Girl Utena - I’ve no doubt my time of fully diving into this anime is approaching, but thus far, I’ve only nibbled at the edges. I know there’s shit here, there are too many people into it. MOSTLY THOUGH I’M STILL CONFUSED ABOUT WHY THERE WAS A KANGAROO (previous liveblogs here)

Rose of Versailles - It’s a historical anime and I think there are lesbians?

Samurai Pizza Cats - I could have this wrong, but I think this is a dubbed anime that’s hilariously unconcerned about anything involving the actual translation and plot? And it’s about cats that deliver pizza? I think there’s a crow that’s the bad guy or something?

School-Live - I know the general premise and watched the first episode ahead of Doc’s Eight Days liveblog of it. What I know has intrigued me.

Serial Experiments Lain - I watched this waaaay back when. Bought it on DVD! Still have them! I cannot for the life of me remember how I felt about it.

Slayers - Another I watched a bit back when! Found it to be generally okay, but it was like twenty something years ago because I am an old.

Snow White with the Red Hair  **

Suite Precure - See previous Precure notes

Sweetness and Lightning - I got this as a Wildcard a couple GIFTENINGs ago, and found it to be CHARMING AS FUCK. I’m still mildly concerned it’s going to go creepy and weird on me Because Anime, but otherwise, I had a great time. (previous liveblog)

The Promised Neverland ** 

Thunderbolt Fantasy **

Trigun - I think I saw this on commercials for Toonami? Vash the Demolished or something? I THINK IT’S ABOUT A DUDE WITH A GUN

Umineko When They Cry ** 

Violet Evergarden ** 

Yona of the Dawn - I did a tiny bit of this for a commission, but remember next to nothing about it. (previous liveblog)

Zombie Land Saga - I ASSUME IT INVOLVES ZOMBIES IN SOME FASHION

Non-Anime Animated

Adventure Time - Seen a lot of it pass my dash, I know there’s a yellow dog that can be things, and the vampire and the pink one are gay.

Anastasia - Just livestreamed the movie with Holligay for Eight Days! I’ve no particular feelings toward it otherwise.

Archer - I KNOW IT’S ADULT

Barbie: Life in the Dreamhouse - This has been nominated every single GIFTENING, I think, and while I’m no closer to knowing what this is actually about, the persistence is inspiring.

Bob's Burgers - Great show! Seen many episodes! I think it’ll be hard to liveblog in a meaningful way.

Bojack Horseman - I’ve seen through season three. EXCELLENT SHOW

Captain N - What the fuck I think I used to watch this on Saturday mornings

Carmen Sandiego (2019)  **

Castlevania (2017) - I’ve seen a couple gifsets, that’s it.

Chuggingtons - WHY DO YOU PEOPLE HATE ME

Courage the Cowardly Dog - I know the premise, never watched the show.

Cyber Six  **

Daria - It was a Beavis & Butthead spin-off and that immediately killed all interest for me.

Donkey Kong Country (TV series)  **

Ducktales (2017) - I know a lot of people love them, but I have to say, I’m not a huge fan of the Disney ducks, generally speaking.

Epithet Erased  **

Ever After High  **

Gargoyles - Saw the first multi-part episode in a livestream a year or so back. It was pretty standard 90s cartoon stuff to me just from that, but I know it’s well-loved.

Generator Rex  **

Gravity Falls - Currently liveblogging for the Patreon! LOVE IT. I’m not sure we’re outside the exclusivity window for it, but if it makes it into the second heat, I’ll figure out how to go from there.

Green Eggs and Ham (series) - Wait, what the hell, this is a series? HOW DO YOU MAKE THIS INTO A SERIES

Green Lantern: The Animated Series  **

Harley Quinn - Loved the clips I saw of the first episode! Did not love the antisemitic clips I saw of the second episode!

Hazbin Hotel  **

Hilda   **

Home Movies - The few clips I’ve seen were hilarious.

Infinity Train  **

JEM - MY LOVE. It’s desperately 80s and objectively poorly done in places and I adore it with my entire being.

Jonny Quest  **

Kidd Video - I feel like I SHOULD know this, but I can’t place it.

Kim Possible - I’ve heard of it!

Klaus  **

Mao Mao Heroes of Pure Heart  **

Moominvalley (2019) - I know Moomins are those little white hippo things. I am pure confusion beyond that.

My Life as a Teenage Robot  **

Over the Garden Wall - I did a couple episodes for my Patreon a few years ago, and have since finished watching the whole series. I’m up for a rewatch!

Rugrats - I know of it, but have only watched the Hanukkah special.

RWBY - Heard of it! I had the impression it was pretty queerbaity? (don’t quote me on that)

Samurai Jack - I know the premise, but never watched the series

She-Ra (80s) - YES I KNOW YOU

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018) - Love it, love it. I still haven’t seen the most recent “season” (it’s a half season don’t jerk me around Netflix)

Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse - I am a long-time comic book nerd and quite familiar with the Spider-Mans. Saw the film shortly after last year’s GIFTENING and enjoyed it.

Star vs the Forces of Evil - Had a liveblog of this for THE GIFTENING a few years back and it was okay, but I wasn’t super impressed. (previous liveblog)

Super Friends - I FUCKING HATE THE SUPER FRIENDS I SEE YOU HUBBY

Tangled: Before Ever After - Saw the movie, never seen the series!

The Animals of Farthing Wood  **

The Dragon Prince - I’ve heard Tumblr chatter in a general sense, but no details.

The Hollow  **

The Loud House  **

The Super Mario Bros. Super Show  **

Thundercats - I fucking loved Thundercats as a kid, hahhaha, there is no way it holds up.

Totally Spies - I’ve had several Patreon livestreams with the show, so have a pretty good general sense of the show at this point. I’m not sure it’d make a good liveblog, though.

Venture Brothers - I think it features a blond buff dude in a black t-shirt?

Wakfu (French dub) - Oh hey, this was a free to play game at PAX one year! That’s it, that’s all I know.

Winx Club  **

X-Men: The Animated Series (90s) - DID SOMEONE SAY X-MEN??? I love this show. Hubby and I still to this day quote this show. This show is not good.

X-Men Evolution - Evo, on the other hand, is EXCELLENT. One of the single best incarnations of the X-Men, in my opinion. Seen all eps multiple times, love it, can talk for a hideously long time about details you never in your life cared about, will probably not make it through an episode, please consider if that is a point for or against it before you vote. (previous liveblog)

Live Action

Agent Carter - Saw the Captain America movie, that’s it!

American Gods - Read the book

Atypical - I know the premise very loosely, and it sounds good, but I’d be a little concerned about accidentally stomping in all the wrong places with my giant clumsy neurotypical feet.

Babylon 5 - I know it’s a sci-fi classic, and I’ve been assured there are characters I would love, but haven’t seen it.

Batman (Adam West series) - A SERIOUS LIVEBLOG WILL RESULT I’M SURE

Black Mirror ("White Bear") - This episode still fucks with me to this day. It’s exceptional, and also very very complicated. This would be a heavy liveblog, be warned. (previous Black Mirror liveblogs)

Brooklyn 99 - I’ve only watched a bit of this and enjoyed it, but like most sitcoms, it’s incredibly difficult to liveblog. (previous liveblog)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer - One of my live’s greatest televisual loves. Joss Whedon and time have mostly driven that out of me, but letting my ego out to play for a second, I have to say, I give some pretty good Buffy. (previous liveblogs)

Cagney & Lacey - A formative favourite for tiny baby Jet Wolf! It’s a cop procedural, with all the downsides that implies, but also it’s lady cop BFFs AND I LOVE IT AND THEM

Carmilla - A current staple of the blog, thanks to @cello-moon! I’ve just started Season 3, and if you’re a regular around here, you know how all this goes. (previous liveblogs)

Charmed (1998) - I know of it, very very loosely, but never watched it.

Charmed (2018) - Also loosely known, but even less so!

Cloak and Dagger - I’m burned out (and just burned) from Disney’s Marvel garbage, but I know Cloak & Dagger from the comics, am that only makes me more surprised this show exists.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - I never picked this back up after THE GIFTENING, but had a great time with what we watched! (previous liveblog)

Critical Role (The Night Before Critmas one-shot) - I haven’t seen this one shot, but I DO love me some Critical Role.

Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance - We watched the whole series, and I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would. PODLINGS ARE VALID AND HUP IS THE MOST VALID OF ALL

Dear Friends **

Derry Girls - Watched the whole thing a couple times now, absolutely adore it. One of the best shows I’ve seen in a while. Once again though, comedies can be SO hard to liveblog.

Dinnerladies **

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency - I’ve heard of the book series?

Doctor Who - I’ve tried SO HARD to like Doctor Who, and yet.

Doctor Who (City of Death serial) - See above, no thoughts on this serial specifically.

Elementary - I’ve seen the first three seasons, I think it is? They began to lose me with some season choices, but I love Sherlock and Joan SO MUCH.

Farscape - I watched the series when it was first on The Sci-Fi Channel, but they kept jerking the schedule around and it fell off my radar. Quite liked it though, as I recall.

Galavant - I SUPER BELIEVE IN YOU TAD COOPER (previous liveblogs)

Good Omens (miniseries) - Read the book and survived the miniseries consuming Tumblr, but didn’t watch it myself.

Hannibal - I remember when this was EVERYWHERE, but mostly I remember that it was very gay and had that guy from Rogue One in it.

Hellier  **

His Dark Materials - Haven’t watched it, haven’t read the books, I know nothing!

Kamen Rider (1971, ep 1)  **

Kamen Rider Fourze  **

Kamen Rider W  **

Kanpai Senshi After V  **

Killing Eve - I’ve seen some photo and gif sets, but haven’t watched it. I think they’re trying to murder each other? But also fuck? IT’S VERY CONFUSING

Legends of Tomorrow - I know it’s a DC show, and I think it has something to do with time travelers?

Leverage - I just watched and streamed my first two episodes last night on Patreon! Quite enjoyed it, more than I expected to.

LOST - Until proven otherwise, I’ll assume this was a troll nomination. GOOD GOD I HATE LOST

Lost Girl  **

Love Island (season 3)  **

Maho Sentai Magiranger  **

Midnight Dinner: Tokyo Stories  **

Murder She Wrote - Actual lol, I have no idea why this was nominated, but I love it and also you. ANGELA LANSBURY ON TV WE ALL WIN

Murdoch Mysteries  **

Once Upon a Time - The premise is fairytales all smooshed together I think?

One Day at a Time (2017) - I’ve watched all but the most recent season, I think. Good show, very enjoyable, but mostly “watch and forget” for me.

Orphan Black - Currently liveblogging, thanks to @skylineofspace​! I’m currently on episode 4, and absolutely loving it. (previous liveblogs)

Parks and Recreation - I’ve seen all but the last season, I think. Great show, but once again, I’d expect a difficult time liveblogging it.

Pushing Daisies - Never seen it. I think it’s about someone whose touch kills?

Re:Mind  **

Russian Doll - Never seen a single second, but I’ve heard nothing but good things through the grapevine.

Sapphire & Steel - HUBBY’S TROLLING ME AGAIN. This is an oooold old old English sci-fi/horror show that I used to watch when I was a tiny tiny Jet Wolf and it scared the shit out of me. I’M STILL MILDLY TRAUMATIZED BY IT TO THIS DAY

Schitt's Creek  **

Sense8  **

Shanara  **

Smash  **

Star Trek: The Next Generation - I love me some Star Trek. I’ve seen all of TNG, but haven’t sat down to fully rewatch the series ever, so most I only saw when they first aired.

Stargate SG1 - I think this is based on a movie I also haven’t seen.

Tantei no Tantei  **

Terrace House  **

The Good Place - OKAY SO THE GOOD PLACE. I watched the first two seasons and LOVED THEM. Mostly. I DO NOT love the Eleanor/Chidi thing. I do not love it to the extent that it completely sucked out my desire to continue with the show. I haven’t seen anything of it past the S2 finale. (previous liveblog)

The Haunting of Hill House - Watched and enjoyed the whole miniseries. I confess to being uncertain about liveblogging this though, as I feel Doc is doing it so much better than I could hope to do.

The Magicians & The Crown  **

The Mandalorian - I KNOW BABY YODA BECAUSE I AM A PERSON WHO EXISTS IN OUR MODERN WORLD (that is all I know)

The Middleman  **

The Tick (2016) - I know and enjoyed the cartoon!

The Untamed  **

Twilight Zone - Who doesn’t know the Twilight Zone, it’s a fucking classic for a reason.

Twin Peaks - Believe it or not, I have never seen a single second of Twin Peaks. I know it’s weird, I know Laura Palmer is dead, I know functionally nothing else.

Ultraman X  **

Westworld - Haven’t seen it, though I believe it’s loosely based on the movie of the same name which I HAVE seen.

What We Do in the Shadows (series) - I’ve seen neither the series nor the movie, but know it’s Taika Waititi and is reportedly hilarious.

Worst Cooks in America - WAIT AM I IN A TV SHOW

Xena: Warrior Princess - My OTHER great love. Adore Xena, adore everything about it (well, mostly), have devoted a not insignificant amount of my heart and brainspace to Xena, if you have me talk about Xena I may never shut up. (previous liveblogs)

Movies

Arrival  **

Atomic Blonde ** 

Barbie's The Princess and The Pauper ** 

Bedknobs and Broomsticks - Saw it a million years ago, remember functionally nothing.

Best in Show - Also seen a very long time ago, just the once.

Bohemian Rhapsody - I love Queen and Freddie Mercury, and I had exactly zero interest in watching this film.

Brave - A Disney/Pixar movie I actually liked!

Cabaret - I haven’t seen the film, though I did see the stage musical, and it fucked me up pretty hardcore for a while there. (Do not let that dissuade you from voting for it! I’ve been wanting to watch the movie. Trump had just been elected when I saw it performed AND WELL THERE WERE THINGS)

Captain Marvel - Haven’t seen it, but it’s one of the few later stage Disney/Marvel offerings I’ve had any interest in.

Captain Underpants  **

Carrie (1976) - ANOTHER SUPER OLDIE I’M SO DELIGHTED. I’ve seen it as well as read the book (both a very long time ago)

Castaway on the Moon  **

Cats (1998) - hahahah I SEE YOU YOU ASSHOLES

Chocolat  **

Clue (1985) - One of my personal favourite movies, though I did stream it not too long ago for my Patreon.

Coco  **

Crank  **

Crimson Peak  **

Dale and Tucker vs Evil - I’ve never seen this, but have wanted to.

Detective Pikachu - Saw this in the theater, and I’m still not sure if I actually enjoyed it or not.

Equestria Girls Rainbow Rocks - THIS IS A MY LITTLE PONY THING ISN’T IT

EVA  **

Fate/Grand Order: First Order  **

Flash Gordon - Delicious, cheesy fun.

Frozen 2 - I won’t be able to stream this if it’s not been released when it’s GIFTENING time, so just keep that in mind. Also please note that I have not seen Frozen 1. I only just, a few months ago, heard “Let it Go” for the first time. TRUE STORY.

Godzilla: King of Monsters  **

Happy New Year (Bollywood) - I legit love Bollywood films, this sounds delightful.

Here Alone  **

Home  **

Hoodwinked!  **

Hot Fuzz - LOVE HOT FUZZ

How to Train Your Dragon  **

Howl's Moving Castle - I haven’t seen it, but I’ve had a few other Miyazaki films voted in for GIFTENING and Patreon, and I haven’t really enjoyed any of them. I’M WILLING TO TRY AGAIN. Just keep in mind, they may not be for me.

Hustlers  **

In Her Shoes  **

Inside Out  **

Interstellar  **

It's Such a Beautiful Day  **

Jennifer's Body  **

Jojo Rabbit - I wasn’t able to see this when it was at our local indy theater, and I regret missing it. I’d love to see it, but I’m not sure with my goyische commentary would be the best delivery method.

Jupiter Ascending - Love this beautiful dumb film, omg. I’ve streamed this for previous GIFTENINGs though, if that’s a thing to care about.

Klaus  **

Knives Out - Very keen to see this, but it may not be out on dvd/streaming before THE GIFTENING, so bear that in mind.

Last of the Blonde Bombshells  **

Legally Blonde - I’VE ACTUALLY NEVER SEEN THIS. I feel like I have, from all the gifs and shit, but nope!

Love Never Dies - Oh my god is this the Phantom sequel, why do you all hate me.

Mad Max: Fury Road - LOVE IT. I’ve done it for THE GIFTENING before, though, just a note.

Madoka: Rebellion - (copied from Rebellion in Anime)  I saw the Madoka series (fairly ambivalent to it), and heard the movie was terrible, but no clue why, specifically.

Man from UNCLE  **

Masters of the Universe (He-Man, 1987) - This movie is so fucking bad hahaha

Midsommar  **

Monster High: Fright On  **

Muppet Christmas Carol - Just watched this during Holligay’s Eight Days! I’m not sure it’s really in my wheelhouse, being relatively lukewarm on both A Christmas Carol and the Muppets, but I’d do my best!

Murder on the Orient Express  **

Newsies (1992)  **

One Cut of the Dead  **

Pacific Rim - I saw it in the theater and actually didn’t care for it over much. I’d be willing to give it another shot though, it might be better second time around.

Pan's Labyrinth - I’ve streamed this film a couple times now, I think, but it’s a good one, so I’m up for another go if you guys want!

Parasite (2019)  **

Perfect Blue  **

Pleasantville  **

Promare  **

Redline  **

Resident Evil  **

Return to Oz - I saw this as a kid and haven’t again since. TAKE THAT INFORMATION AS YOU WILL.

Rock-a-Doodle  **

Searching (2018)  **

Secret of Nimh - LITTLE JET WOLF LOVED THIS MOVIE. Adult Jet Wolf hasn’t sampled it.

Spaceballs - I’ve watched the shit out of Spaceballs. I love a parody, I’m shameless.

Speed Racer (2008) - I’ve only seen this once,but actually enjoyed it more than I expected to.

Spice World - I legitimately love this movie. I’m not sure it’s GOOD but it’s a thousand times better than it has any right to be.

Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse - Good movie, lots of fun, I streamed it not too long ago on Patreon.

Star Wars - IT’S STAR WARS

Star Wars Holiday Special - I’ve never watched this, and I’m not sure how excited I am to change that fact.

Street Fighter (1994) - I HAVE ONLY HEARD THE LEGENDS

Summer Wars  **

Super Mario Brothers - Oh .. this can’t be good ...

Tale of Tales  **

Tangled - I’ve seen it, but didn’t have strong opinions one way or the other.

The Adventures of Tintin  **

The Great Muppet Caper - I’m sure I’ve seen this, but fuck if I can remember anything.

The Last Jedi (hatewatch) - WELP

The Living Wake  **

The Lost Boys - It’s not a good movie, and I love it.

The Mummy (1999) - Streamed recently on Patreon!

The Rezort  **

The Road to El Dorado - I’ve seen it, I want a Sailor Moon AU of it.

The Room - I know it’s considered one of the worst films ever made, but I’ve never had the personal privilege of experience.

Tokyo Godfathers  **

Us (2019) - Saw it in the theater, totally down for seeing it again with perspective on the whole movie.

Venom  **

Wall-E - Probably my favourite Pixar film!

Wayne's World - Saw it back when! Does it hold up? WHO KNOWS

What We Do in the Shadows (movie) - As mentioned above, I’ve never seen it, but I’ve heard it’s an amazing Taika Waititi joint.

When Marnie Was There  **

Wolf Children Ame and Yuki  **

X-Men 2 - GOD I LOVED THIS MOVIE. I’m not sure how well it would hold up, but when it came out? One of the few films I’ve paid to see multiple times in the theater.

Your Name  **

Games

Ace Attorney (blog) -  I’ve tried multiple times with the Ace Attorney games, and I must be honest and say I just don’t like them.

Amnesia: The Dark Descent - I’ve watched a playthrough! The story’s not good. THE IDEA OF PLAYING IT STRESSES ME OUT SO HARD HAHAHAH YOU FUCKS

Among the Sleep (stream)  **

Arkham Knight (main story run) (stream) - Very intrigued to play this. I’ve tinkered a bit, but get distracted by all the side stuff. The motivation to just streamline the story very much appeals.

Baba is You (stream) - I’ve heard great things about the game, but in a “It was great!” way, I still know fuck all about it.

Black Closet (blog)  **

Borderlands (stream) - Love Borderlands, it’s fun as hell. I’d probably angle for Borderlands 2 over the first, but would have a good time however it went.

Catherine Classic  **

Cho Aniki  **

Control (stream) - I’ve seen a little bit on Steam, just enough to know I’m interested.

Cthulhu Save Christmas - Never heard of it, but great title.

Cuphead (stream)  **

Danganronpa  **

Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc (blog)   **

Dead by Daylight (stream)  **

Death Stranding  **

Death Trips  **

Detention (stream)  **

Disco Elysium (blog) - I’ve heard great things, would be totally okay with a reason to play it.

Doki Doki Lit Club (stream) - I was so intrigued with this from THE GIFTENING a couple years ago that I wanted to work it into the main schedule, but it just didn’t happen. 100% on-board the chance to keep going!

Dragon Age: Origins (stream) - I KEEP STALLING WHENEVER I TRY TO REPLAY THIS GAME SO I CAN MOVE TO DA2 THIS IS MY PERSONAL HELL

Dragon Quest Builders 2 (stream)  **

Dream Daddy - I know the premise, and the idea of blogging this is beautiful.

Final Fantasy X (blog) - Have I played X? (asks Hubby) YES I HAVE. It’s one of the few that I finished. Final Fantasy games usually entail so much grinding that I’m not sure it’d be a great liveblog, but I’d do my best!

Firewatch - I’ve been wanting reasons to play this SO MUCH.

Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective (stream) - I’m preeetty sure everyone just wants to hear how many terrible accents we can do. And that’s legit! I’ve since figured out how to play mobile games on my PC so the video quality would be better than last time, but that is the only improvement I could promise. (previous stream)

Gris  **

Half Dead 2 (stream)  **

Hand of Fate 2 (blog) - I think this is a card game?

Hatoful Boyfriend/Pigeon Fucking (blog) - IS IT EVEN REALLY THE GIFTENING WITHOUT PIGEON FUCKING (previous liveblogs)

Hollow Knight  **

House Flipper (blog) - I’ve tentatively had my eye on this on Steam for a while, so seeing this nominated tickled me.

Just Dance (stream) - Jesus wept, you all DO hate me. IF I HAVE TO DO THIS I WON’T DO IT ALONE

Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky (First Chapter) (blog)  **

Legend of Zelda (stream) - I AM SO BAD AT THIS GAME WHY

Life is Strange (blog) - See below!

Life is Strange (stream) - I streamed all episodes of Life is Strange a couple years back. While I’m not sure I’d have much to offer on a replay, I’ll happily do it if you guys vote it in. MEANWHILE, here’s a playlist with all the Life is Strange streams.

Life is Strange 2 - My understanding is it’s a separate game from the first with new characters and new story.

Life is Strange: Before the Storm (stream) - And I believe this is a prequel to the first Life is Strange featuring Max and Chloe.

Little Inferno (stream)  **

Long Live the Queen (blog) - YOU KNOW PINK PRINCESS (previous liveblogs)

Long Live the Queen (stream) (with walkthrough to not repeat) - I laughed so hard at the nomination specifically giving my ass a walkthrough.

Mass Effect 1 - I’ve played it multiple times! The Mass Effect series is one of my personal favourites.

Monster Prom (w/Hubby, Doc, & Jill) (stream) - AGAIN WITH VOICES I SEE YOU. It can be difficult to get everyone’s schedules all in alignment, so this may be subject to shuffling and delays, just to keep in mind.

Nancy Drew: Ghost Dogs of Moon Lake (stream)  **

Overwatch (stream) - I assume this is more group play? But we can talk details if it makes it into further heats.

Oxenfree (stream) - I’ve fully streamed Oxenfree on the Patreon. It’s well outside the exclusivity window at this point, and I’m happy to make those public if you guys were interested and would rather put your votes elsewhere. That said, I really enjoyed the game, and think a second playthrough could add a lot to the overall experience, so feel free.

Pathologic 2 (blog)  **

Persona 3 Portable (blog)  **

Pillars of Eternity (blog) - I’ve never finished Pillars of Eternity, but I do have a game with some significant progress I could continue. Alternately, I could roll a whole new character, and would play it however you guys chose. We have options if we go this route!

Pokemon Go (stream/videos) - Amazing. Here the link to last year’s Pokemon Go, if you’d like some idea of what the fuck this is about!

Portal (stream) - The Portal series is great, I think it does some really interesting and innovative ideas with gameplay. I’ve played and finished the first two, though remembering the solutions to any of those puzzles is, of course, another thing entirely.

Recettear: An Item Shop Tale (stream) - THIS WAS THE FIRST THING I EVER BOUGHT ON STEAM. I haven’t played it in forever, and I’m not sure how entertaining it would be, but I’m down for finding out!

Resident Evil 2 remake (blog) - IT’S ZOMBIES. That’s about all I know about Resident Evil.

Reventure  **

Sara is Missing  **

Shovel Knight (stream)  **

Slime Rancher (blog) - I have and have played Slime Rancher! I’m a little unsure about blogging it, but would try!

Slime Rancher (stream) - I WASN’T EXPECTING SUCH A RUSH FROM THE SLIME RANCHER FANDOM THIS YEAR

Stanley Parable - I think Hubby’s played this? I seem to recall it has a narrator who comments on what you do, but I don’t know much else.

Stardew Valley (blog) - I’ve never gotten as far in Stardew Valley as I’ve felt I would. Lots to do for me, yet!

Stardew Valley (stream) - Same as above, just in stream form!

Subnautica (stream) - I’ve done several Subnautica streams for Patreon, and if this gets through, I’d release them so everyone (who wants to) can catch up. If I recall, my last play left off with me exploring a big ass ship that crashed.

Superluminal  **

Tales from the Borderlands - It’s Borderlands, but Telltale, though!

Tales of Symphonia  **

Team SASV (Pokemon X/Y) - TEAM SASSY AND SOMEWHAT VAIN. If this gets in, I’ll need all the intervening time to try and find my fucking DS. (previous liveblogs, via the backup)

The 7th Guest (blog)  **

The Beginner's Guide (stream)  **

The Long Dark   **

The Outer Worlds - I haven’t played this yet but would be extremely delighted for an excuse to pick it up and start.

The Walking Dead game - I watched Hubby play the first two installments, haven’t seen beyond that. Felt the second was weak, LOVED the first. I’ve been hanging on Holligay’s playthrough, so I’m relatively familiar with the story again, save the last episode, which she’s not played yet. I’ve been wanting to before she did, to compare what I think she’ll do to what she actually does, so an excuse to get going on that would be welcome.

The Witcher 3 (stream) - I know @jewishsuperfam loves The Witcher, AND THAT IS ALL I KNOW.

Undertale (blog) - AREN’T I LIKE TWO MINUTES FROM FINISHING THIS. The fight where I left off was frustrating THE PISS out of me, but if this gets in, I’ll get Hubby to read up on what I need to do, and maybe get around that fight before the liveblog, so I don’t spend the whole time getting nowhere and then punching my monitor.

Untitled Goose Game (stream) - I just last month finished this on the Patreon! I need to double check that it would be out of the exclusivity window, but if so, I’d be happy to release it for you guys. I had a great time, but I don’t think there’s much to be regained from playing it again.

VA-11 Hall-A (blog)  **

VooDoo Vance: Remastered  **

Wattam  **

We Happy Few (stream) - I know the basic storyline premise, but little else.

What Remains of Edith Finch (blog) - I watched Holligay’s stream of this and loved the story.

Wild Arms 3  **

Wild ARMs XF (blog)  **

Yakuza 0 (stream)  **

Zero Escape 999 (blog)  **

AND THAT’S THAT. Sailor Moon Day and Miscellaneous don’t require much input from me ahead of time, I don’t feel, but if you have a question on anything there -- or something that’s unclear here, just shoot me an Ask. AND IF YOU FOUND THIS USEFUL PLEASE LET ME KNOW. It took me ... just SO much longer than I was expecting it to. Which I don’t mind, but if it’s not actually helpful to anyone, that’s time better spent elsewhere next year.

[eclecticash22]

For the anon asking about the Norma Jeane anon! LD goes into more depth on this.

**Trigger Warning: sexual themes, self harm, suicide**

Also, before you begin reading I want to make sure that we’re on the same page. No judgment is welcome here. Anon doesn’t want to be judged and I do not want to see judgment. You’re entitled to your opinion, but if you have anything negative to say, then I ask that you keep it to yourself. This is a judgment free zone and it will not be tolerated! Thank you for being kind human beings.

Hi this is LD from the Norma Jeane ask. I was gonna answer this in your ask but the letter limit made it hard to explain. I ask that when you post this that my username remains unknown. To respond to the other anon, I asked another psychic on tumblr who I was in a past life. She said a European woman between the 50’s-70’s. Now I’m not sure what made me decide to look up Marilyn Monroe but I did and I just felt something. I’ve looked into her and we really have a lot of similarities and synchronicities. Our childhood is similar. My mother is someone that part of me loves but another part would rather stay away. My dad is in my life, but as rarely as we see each other he may as well be absent. Norma Jeane would go to the beach with her mom sometimes and she’s always loved the beach. The beach for me is one of the few places where all of my worries disappear. I overthink a lot. But being at the beach, there’s just one thing on my mind and that’s the water. ( I’m also the same person that asked you if I was a mermaid sorry😅). Anyway, like Norma Jeane I’ve also been sexualized at a young age. Like her, it started with ppl in my family. Idk i just always seemed to attract ppl in that way. I had mixed feelings about it at first. I loved the feeling of sex, craved it lots of times(I heard that not everyone who has been sexually exposed at a young se stays away from sex and the opposite may happen instead). However on the other hand, I felt dirty for the ppl that I’ve had those intimate moments with. It was never rape because i was never forced. It would just be suggested by a friend or cousin and I would give in. I always had a hard time saying no to ppl. I felt guilty and ashamed whenever I would touch myself( I probably should’ve warned from the beginning that this might get a bit sexual). However, I’m starting to embrace my sexuality and am learning that whatever attracts ppl to me is my own kind of power, so long as nobody takes advantage of that. I’ve never been in any foster home or orphanages but I remember my mom threatening me a lot of times about cps taking me away and telling me I would live in a foster home. I’ve stayed in numerous of different people’s households. Some family members. Some friends who I clung to( I think I have abandonment issues, I get very attached to ppl I like). Idk I was just always looking to stay with a family that wasn’t my own. I’m also very shy now in contrast to my friendly younger self. Despite that I’ve always been told that I’m good with words and speaking. I’ve always loved reading and am good at writing, although I don’t really like writing much. If you knew that Marilyn Monroe loved to read and wrote poetry, then congratulations you know more about her than most ppl who walk around with her on shirts and posters of her on their walls for aesthetic reasons( something that bothered me at first but whatever). I’ve also been into acting. My mom told me that I was good with speaking in public and that I should try it. She encouraged me to join in middle school but my shyness and fear of being embarrassed or made fun of prevented me from doing that. I tried out tho in high school. Although that was short lived because the theatre teacher left, she told me that I was good and I enjoyed acting very much. Animals are something else that I really loved. I always wanted a dog, but because I’ve lived in apartments almost my whole life, I always ended up with fish, which was probably a sign from my higher self that I was a mermaid but that’s a different story. I’m sorry I’m all over the place and I keep losing track. There’s just so many things to cover. Los Angeles is another place I’ve been interested in going to. Specifically Sherman Oaks. That’s because I had an obsession with the late Cameron Boyce, who now that I look back on had a few things in common with Marilyn Monroe, such as height, where he lived, being an actor, writing poetry, and dying at such an untimely age. My walk is something else that I think we have in common.

This doesn’t happen often because it’s not really noticeable, but every now and then someone would point out how I would twist or how my hips would sway whenever I walked. My mom looked at me funny once when I was younger when I walked in front of her. This is because I’m a guy. A bisexual guy specifically, which makes sense since Marilyn has been with many men. Maybe she’s been with a few women as well, or maybe I’m fully gay and just won’t accept it yet idk. I’ve always been feminine as well. I don’t identify as a woman, but I do feel like one lots of times. I’ve also been told a few times that i should be a model, mainly I think because of my long legs. A trait Marilyn also had. Maybe because of my face too but I don’t think I’m THAT good looking. Then again, there were ppl who didn’t find Marilyn attractive enough either. I’ve also been in a mental hospital once. I’ve had suicidal thoughts and even tried it a few times. I’ve seen a therapist, and right now, with how I’ve currently been feeling I wonder if I’m bipolar. I also suffer from insomnia and anxiety. Again, if you know more about Marilyn Monroe than just looks and glamour than you’ll understand. I also love the 50’s aesthetics. Although I’m a fan of the 80’s and 90’s as well so ig that probably doesn’t mean much. I love roses and been interested in gardening. I’ve also always wanted to live in one of those Spanish homes. I always found them beautiful.I love love. I love men, I love children. I have a lot of fantasies. Part of those fantasies are of being with various men(I’m not getting into details). But other fantasies involves being with a secure, fun, intelligent man who really loves me and having children. Which is weird since I’m a guy but Marilyn has always wanted to marry with a man she really loves, have kids, and be a good wife. After she settles down and retires from her career ofc. It hurts me so much that none of my relationships seem to last. They always leave. I’m currently trying to recover from a “break up” right now. I’ve determined my beauty and value based on how many guys are attracted to me, which is cruel and untrue. There are times when I feel like I can’t really live and be happy without someone by my side. I have a huge fear of being alone and rejected and unhappy my entire life. Just the thought depresses me. I can’t express enough how much I’ve loved and gotten attached to boys, thinking I would be loved back and live a life together, only to be heartbroken. I think in this life, I have to learn lessons that I didn’t learn in my past life to not depend so much on men to keep me happy and that I shouldn’t get so attached. Not all relationships are forever. There are probably more similarities but that’s all I can think of for now, and this is long enough already. Now, even with all of these similarities it still doesn’t prove that i was Marilyn Monroe. I’m pretty sure a lot of ppl can relate to most if not all of what I just said. So I went to you Ash to ask if Joe DiMaggio was my twin flame in my past life(yes that was me too Ash I’m so sorry). I feel like Marilyn and Joe were twin flames in that life and I’ve had dreams of this guy who looks very similar and have similar characteristics to Joe. When you told me Joe DiMaggio was in fact my twin flame, I saw this as another confirmation that I could’ve been Marilyn Monroe in a past life, however I still couldn’t be 100% sure so I decided to just pop the question I really wanted. I asked Ash if I was a girl named Norma Jeane. I didn’t feel comfortable saying Marilyn Monroe because I didn’t want to be seen as those egocentric nut jobs who claim to be the reincarnation of famous ppl. I also knew less ppl would know who Norma Jeane is compared to if I put Marilyn Monroe. In fact it’s these very reasons why I’m hoping that what I’m telling you doesn’t get out of hand. I don’t like TOO much attention and I don’t want to be backlashed for believing in this. Speaking of which, Marilyn also

Didn’t like all of the attention and invasion of privacy a while after being famous. She would walk around in “disguises” and give fake names whenever she checked into hotels. Which is somewhat similar to things I’ve done before. Marilyn and I both seemed to be secretive and enjoy our privacy. Not that we weren’t honest or open, it’s just not everyone needs to know everything you know. Also I’ve always said that I wanted to die in my sleep. I’ve always said that because I wanted to die a peaceful and painless death, not knowing that I did die in my sleep in my past life. Anyway, yeah so I asked if I was Norma Jeane and I got a yes, which was a relief. I’m sorry anon that this probably what you wasn’t looking for. I didn’t have any psychic moments. I didn’t have any dreams or recall any memories. Marilyn Monroe didn’t appear to me and tell me that I was her in a past life. Everything that I learned is only due to research, signs, intuition, and these two lovely and helpful tumblr psychics that I mentioned. Ofc part of me will always have doubts whether or not I really am Marilyn Monroe. It’s only natural to have doubts. Just like how I have my doubts if I’m really a mermaid in the astral or spirit realm or afterlife or whatever you call it. But until I get proof that I’m not Marilyn Monroe or a mermaid or that Joe DiMaggio wasn’t her twin flame, I will go on believing these things to be true or at least a possibility. But I’ll never be 100% sure until I’m dead. This has honestly been painful to talk about considering I’m bringing up not only my past life but also my past in THIS life, which some of it still hurts. But it’s been nice sharing this. Thank you❤️.

*Hey, LD! Thank you for sharing your story. And no need to apologize for asking about being a mermaid or Joe DiMaggio! I’m happy to answer your questions  ❤️ ❤️ *

[rightonwoman]

What is a VSCO Girl? Saddle up, buckaroos: we’ve got a lot of ground to cover before sundown.

The term “VSCO (rhymes with disco) Girl” refers to a human who wears certain clothing, pursues a certain lifestyle, and uses certain phrases, often ad nauseas. The VSCO aesthetic is a bewildering mash-up of disconnected and yet extremely specific references. To start with, VSCO is a photo editing app that teens use to filter their photos for Instagram. The phrases VSCO girls use come from Black Twitter: “sksksksks” is meant to represent a writer smashing their keyboard, and “and I oop” is taken from a Black Drag Queen’s video blog. VSCO girls take their inspiration from 90s fashion, surfer girl culture, and environmental awareness. The VSCO aesthetic is not cheap - Birkenstock sandals, Hydroflask water bottles, Kanken backpacks all add up, restricting this lifestyle to those who can afford it.

I want us to be wary of the cultural impetus to demean anything girls do, and this is a movement of girls - young women & female children just trying to have a good time and live their best lives. It’s a truth universally acknowledged that anything young women do in large numbers - any product they buy, musician they enjoy, or content they create - gets put down by the larger culture, and no one knows why... I’m kidding. We all know why: it’s the misogyny, duh.

What I take away from the VSCO Girl phenomenon is both something timeless, and something very “of the moment”. All the teen subcultures that you knew in high school and all the ones that have sprouted, sporadically and mushroom like, in the years since, are driven by a quest for identity and belonging. Who should I be? and How can I find the others? are questions adolescents are beginning to ask and answer by signalling their adherence to a certain style of expression.

But what is most emblematic of the specific context in which contemporary teens are asking these questions is the way in which every expression is curated, filtered, and broadcast for mass consumption. This is not your Mama’s Polaroid, or your best friend’s disposable camera that took 24 extremely terrible pictures that you still treasured because they were all the record you had of those strange times. People today can and do record and share every aspect of their lives, but while adults fear that this sharing is thoughtless and reckless, teens are actually very savvy about their image and the way they project themselves in the world. They may just value the positive opinions of their peers more highly than the admonitions of their elders.

[innerclouds]

Questions to really go deep

1. Do you have more friends or acquaintances? No.

2. What emotion are you most afraid of feeling/ displaying? Depends on who’s company I’m keeping.

3. Have you ever experienced a “glitch in the matrix” moment? Deja vu? Constantly. Probably just signs of a stroke coming down the line.

4. Favorite term you discovered on Urban dictionary. I don't browse it so none?

5. What’s a subject you could talk about for hours? Politics.

6. What’s the difference between a type and a preference? I am not getting into this, this is a trap question.

7. What secretly scares you about society? I'd say but I'd be labeled for "wrong think" on this platform. Not that I haven't been already.

8. How bad is your FOMO? What is a FOMO?

9. What’s your spirit animal? Depends on the quiz thing I've taken, it's always different.

10. How well do you perform in school? About average.

11. What are your good habits? What are your bad habits? Washing hands. Biting nails.

12. What personal trait are you most proud of? I can doodle gud I guess.

13. What does your driving say about you? Paranoid.

14. What do you think is the weirdest/ creepiest societal norm? Man that's a long list. Again, it would get me labeled for "wrong think".

15. Favorite sound effect? None.

16. You have the power to divide the world by 2 to 4 groups of people, how do you divide them? With a battle axe.

17. What popular saying or quote pisses you have? The heck is a quote piss?

18. Are you cooperative or a contrarian? Yes.

19. Something a lot of people like that you HATE. Again, I probably shouldn't say.

20. There’s a website that rates and reviews your performance as a lover. What would the reviews for you say? 10/10.

21. What was “the incident” that happened at your high school or college? Which one? There were a lot of those.

22. Has there been a time where you wanted to speak up about something but held your tongue anyways? Gee I dunno.

23. A big risk you took that paid off. Short list.

24. A big risk you took that did not work out. Long list.

25. What’s your favorite historical event to research? Black plague. Actually did something for that as a subject for school once, it was entertaining.

26. How do you work your way into someone’s heart? Rib cage with a bone saw.

27. What food combinations do you enjoy that other people find weird? Not sure.

28. Have you ever had an encounter with law enforcement? How’d it turn out? With a rent-a-cop. About as well as you’d expect.

29. What book made you appreciate reading? All of them.

30. Are you toxic? Are you afraid to admit it? Oh no, I am absolutely toxic and I own it. Some say I'm hitler 2.0 because *gasp* I have differing opinions and tend to rely on facts and evidence. The horror!

31. Dumbest thing you’ve done in a foreign country? Haven't been in any of those. Unless Utah counts, in which, I went to Utah counts as dumbest thing.

32. What do you think is an unfair double standard between men and women? This is another trap question, especially with how it's worded, that I refuse to get into because it'll take hours and I simply cannot be arsed.

33. What’s your personal heaven? Full of eggrolls.

34. What is something that everyone should experience in their lifetime? Conflict.

35. How often do you change your mind on something you thought you were concrete on? Not often, but if you present solid evidence it will help sway me.

36. Is it easier for you to love or hate? What do you think this says about you? I'm an emotional sponge so both. Probably says a lot.

37. You have doubts about the person you’re romantically involved with, how does this get resolved? Don't have any doubts but if I did I would expect by talking it out.

38. Has there been a time where you thought you were helping someone but were actually enabling their worst habits? Possibly.

39. “Charlie” is short for “Charles” but both have the same amount of letters. What are your thoughts? I don't care.

40. To the person you’re asking these questions to: what is the best and worst things about them? Them being them is the best thing about them. Need more days off, heh.

41. Do you surround yourself with people that bring the best or worst out of you? The former.

42. What will inevitably lead to human extinction? Humans themselves, unfortunately it's taking far too long.

43. Is it better for someone to have a wide range of superficial knowledge or deep knowledge about a few things? Yes.

44. What if there were no professionals in any given subject, but everyone knew a little bit about everything? Okay?

45. How can we judge ourselves by our intentions yet judge others by their actions? This can lead to very murky waters and I'm starting to wonder if the OP has a personal slant on these questions, as far as I'm concerned actions speak and intentions are just intentions until they are actions.

46. Can we ever believe someone when they say their intentions are different from their actions? So that basically confirms it. Thanks for playing.

47. What if you could tell if someone’s intentions were truly transparent upon first meeting them? OP, stop it.

48. What is the biggest waste of human potential? That is an extremely long list, but somewhere around the top five? I'd say social media.

49. Would things get better or worse if humans focused on what was going well rather than what’s going wrong? Maybe, maybe not.

50. What benefits does art provide society? Does art hurt society in any way? Art will always benefit society and no, art does not hurt it at all.

51. When did you screw everything up, but no one ever found out it was you? Can't recall doing any of that.

52. How sneaky were you when you were younger? Or was it something recent that you messed up and got away with? See above.

53. What would you name your boat if you had one? Leaky.

54. What’s the worst commercial you’ve recently seen? Why is it so bad? The gillette commercial, you know the one, for obvious reasons.

55. What’s the closest thing to real magic? Love.

56. What is the craziest thing one of your teachers has done? Halloween, dressed as an escaped crazy person with actual chains, dragging them down the halls and scaring the crap out of anyone unfortunate enough to cross his path.

57. On a scale of 1-10, how strict are/were your parents? 7.

58. Who was your worst teacher? Why? Don't recall.

59. Who was your favorite teacher? Why? Either PE teacher and another down the line. They both understood.

60. Which would you pick: being world-class attractive, a genius or famous for doing something great? None of the above, fame is overrated.

61. What paper that you’ve written are you most proud of? See school subject on the black plague.

62. What would you do if you were invisible for a day? You mean I've not been invisible my entire life?

63. What actions in your life will have the longest reaching consequences? Rather not mention.

64. You’re the first human to interact with an alien and it’s non-hostile. What do you do? Too shy and quiet to make a proper first contact, probably doom our species to abrupt extinction as a result due to a misunderstanding.

65. Are you afraid? Who isn't?

66. To the person you’re asking these questions to: date, marry or kill? First two.

67. To the person you’re asking these questions to: where did you meet them? Next to a campfire outside a snowy tavern in the woods.

68. Can you describe your first high experience? Confusing.

69. Nice Wat?

70. Can you describe your worst drunk experience? Never again.

71. Post the 17th picture from your gallery. What gallery?

72. What was your favorite place you’ve been employed? What was your least favorite? None. Theater.

73. Do you value charm or intelligence more? Big meaty brains.

74. What worries you most about your mistakes? All of it.

75. What personal prisons have you built out of fears? Yes.

76. What is the most important thing you could do right now in your personal life? Long list.

77. If you could ask one person, alive or dead, only one question, who would you ask and what would you ask? I wouldn't ask anything.

78. What is your number one goal for the next six months? Improve.

79. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich? Shitposting.

80. Who or what do you think of when you think of love? Bae.

81. When you help someone do you ever think, “What’s in it for me?” No.

82. What’s the difference between settling for things and accepting the way things are? Virtually none.

83. How many of your friends would you trust with your life? One.

84. Is it better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all? Depends.

85. Who do you dream about? Naked butlers.

86. What has been the most terrifying moment of your life thus far? Near car accident.

87. Are ghost or aliens real? In a manner, probably. Most likely.

88. Have you ever broken a bone? No.

89. What’s something you’re embarrassed to admit to try? Vegan meals.

90. Is your nationality a part of your identity? No.

91. Do you find your eye color unique? It can be.

92. Is there a song you enjoy from a genre that you don’t listen to? Multiple.

93. What is your sexuality? Triggering to some.

94. Is the person you’re asking these questions to an introvert, extrovert or an ambivert? Former.

95. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve done for someone? Roses.

96. What’s the worst thing you’ve done to someone? Something I can never forgive myself of.

97. When was the last time you’ve felt jealous? Why? Been a while.

98. Do you still think about your first love? No.

99. Would you want to live in the country you want to go on vacation to the most? Yes and no, they need to clean up their problems first.

[3500things]

national coming out day 2019

originally posted 10.11.2019 on my personal facebook page

To everyone:

National Coming Out Day is today, Friday October 11, 2019.

And I know this post is late. I realize it is after midnight on the east coast so technically it isn’t National Coming Out Day anymore, but something happened tonight that was monumental- and I didn’t get to finish my initial thought while writing earlier. Keep reading, please:

I am excited to celebrate in my first National Coming Out Day, in 2019, as an officially-out member of the gay community. However, today has been very emotional as it causes me to pause for a moment and reflect on my own journey and how I arrived here. As I am reading articles and newsfeeds on the internet today and seeing people compelled in the acceptance and encouragement of this day, to come out, I must say I have very pointed and mixed emotions.

I have mentioned and identified myself as a gay man in a few blogs that I have written recently (that I am sure nobody reads), however, this is really the first time I have publicly acknowledged it as a whole on Facebook- other than to those who I have directly come out to. I have taken pleasure in promoting myself as an ally for a few years now, but I am tired of hiding behind that identity and am ready to step out into the light and live a full, unfiltered and authentic life.

I have known I was different for a long time. I felt feelings as a young child that I simply did not understand, and those feelings did not go away- they never have and only intensified over time. I was raised in an extremely conservative-Christian household, taught that being gay was an immoral and unnatural thing, I got the hellfire and brimstone speech and I was encouraged and forced to speak hate towards things that were supposedly against God. And I did those things. And I hurt people. And I never wanted to do them. But, I always knew that I was what I was forced to speak out about.

I became extremely depressed and suicidal in my teenage years. I tucked away my true self and I damaged myself mentally and physically with the rhetoric I was forced to digest. I never felt like I could be me, until now. In this moment. But getting to this point hasn’t been easy. It has been countless therapy sessions, panic attacks, many nights crying myself to sleep and length of time to get me to finally accept myself and allow myself to explore with the God-given (yes, God-given) gift that being gay has ultimately brought me.

Let’s talk about God for just a quick moment. Know that I am a spiritual person but there is no religion here. Not a drop.

You can throw Genesis 19, Leviticus 18 & 20, Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 and 1 Timothy 1:8-10 at me all day. The Bible says what it says, but it does not mean anything to me personally. The Bible was a manuscript that was written for an ancient time, in an ancient time and does not take into consideration the advancements in human thought and condition over the many years since its inception. The Bible should not be a standard to compare, govern nor should it be used as a tool ultimately control how people live nowadays. Without discrediting the text itself, I do believe there are great life-lessons to be learned from the Bible about love and how to conduct yourself in a more upright way. However, I believe that taking the current Christian argument to the case of homosexuality is the wrong thing to do. And I will vehemently disagree with anyone who does this. It is damaging. It is hurtful and it adds no real value to anything.

Contrary to what religious types will argue, being gay is not wrong. It is not ungodly; it is not a sin and gay people will not go to Hell- even if there is such a place. Being gay is way more than a physical thing. It is an emotional intelligence, it is the idea of love, acceptance and tolerance that comes with a huge responsibility. Being gay is not defined by who you love or choose to be intimate with or enter into marriage with. It is not a choice; it is a reality, a truth, a tangible thing. It is also a greater expansion of oneself, ones spirit and your ability to express love and accept love.

Saying that I was a repressed gay man until the age of 34 is the understatement of the year. I wanted so desperately to explore my sexuality in high school, when at age 16 I decided that I had struggled long enough with trying to figure out what being gay meant and finally internally accepted that I was.

However, I didn’t have the freedom to operate in or express my sexuality, as a teen in my household, at the time. I got bullied in school for not dating women, so I did, and I eventually married a woman. Several years in, while trying rather unsuccessfully at keeping the charade going and while being accused almost daily of being a closeted gay man- we divorced. I had to lie to my friends and family, I had to create a scenario where I was the good guy and she was the bad guy and she did all these things that contributed to the breakdown in our marriage. I wanted something that I felt like I couldn’t have at the time and I couldn’t be the partner she needed much less deserved. We are both better people apart than we ever were together and marrying her is the single biggest regret in my life.

As I’ve grown older and started to formulate my own opinions and ideas about things, I decided to distance myself from my faith and seek a journey of my own understanding. Part of that journey was finally resolving in this year to come out to friends and family.

I told everyone by the end of July, except my dad. I know his opinion of gay folks- he has made it clear. Nothing derogatory of course, but the ignorance to it shows through sometimes. I also know where he stands from a religious perspective- he has also made that clear. He has accepted my friends who are gay, he wants to meet my new friends who are RubiGirls, see a drag show and he wants to know things or ask things but is sometimes hesitant to do it.

I’ve been on an exposure-therapy campaign with him over the past several months. I put a pride flag in my bedroom, some drag queen paraphernalia went on display, I went to 2 Pride celebrations this year- one in Dayton and the other in Cincinnati. He knows what I’m doing is out of the ordinary for me because I’ve never done it before but have always wanted to and have been interested in it. I wanted to go to a Pride event for many years, but I just couldn’t do it. So, as I’ve slowly been exposing him to things and being a little more vocal about my standpoints and viewpoints on LGBTQIA+ issues in the news and culture, he has started to gather and form an opinion.

Today, I was reading a page on Facebook that stated it was a moderated safe space for individuals who were not out to talk and share their stories. What I read was heartbreaking; just the sheer ignorance of parents and things they say to their children just for being gay. I wanted to talk to dad about it, and I did. I told him some of the terrible things that happened to people- mostly issues between sons and fathers- and he expressed to me his disgust with families disowning children just for being gay. I understand and fully appreciate his comment of “…well, I don’t understand it totally, but I’d want my kid to be happy and healthy. There are bigger ‘crimes’ than being gay.”

This ultimately led into a 90+ minute conversation where I was able to tell him how I felt and my entire 16-year backstory. There is more to discuss between he and I, but my tone was measured and precise. The main thing I needed to say, in order to heal myself, be true to myself and allow myself to advance in my life were these 4 words: Dad, I am gay.

We talked and talked some more. He is not mad, a little confused (which is a normal response), and more reflective. He expressed to me that he wants me to be happy, healthy and to make wise decisions (typical dad advice). He also said he loves me and supports me, and always will, regardless of any decision I make – good or bad – in my life.

What a relief this is! On my first real National Coming Out Day I was able to finish writing the prologue of my story of becoming the person I always knew I could be. I am starting to write the chapters of my new life around all the garbage that is in the past. It’s a new day and I am ready to face it with the full support and love of my parents by my side. I truly am blessed and lucky to have this experience play out as it did. A lot of people do not get what I have, and I am very fortunate.

For those of you who need support in whatever journey you may be on, reach out to me if you feel comfortable in doing so. I’m a safe person to come out to. If you’re reading this and you have questions, contact me too. I’m an open book- ask away. If you’re reading this, and you have nothing positive or of value to say then move on.

Thanks for allowing me to share my life so unfiltered and express that vulnerability on the internet for all to consume. This goes a long way in my healing and with moving forward in my life. And, thank you to all of those who have supported me in the past several months as I have made declarations to you about my life. Your love and support mean the world to me and I can never thank you enough.

Love, Jacob

[hypocrisyofandrewdobson]

The Letter, UNCUT!

 Hi, THOAD-

    So here is the Second Letter, the one Dobson didn't want you to see! It's easy to see why; I correct him on everything he got wrong about my first letter, which he doesn't like. And I use evidence! Now, notice that Dobson doesn't DENY anything either, and doesn't try to defend himself. He also, of course, doesn't answer a single question, and they were good ones, about my first letter either. Why DID he think the 'best part' of the letter was my or my father's potential ages? Why DID that delight him so much? Again, I'm only using his words. And the first thing he says is 'Naturally they wrote a 2nd email'. Really? I was expected? I also did not try to 'debate' him, nor did I say I feel 'slighted' by him. So, those are outright lies, notice the use of quotes, or certainly misleading. Looking at the comments, even his supporters can't read or interpret anything right. And...why aren't they wondering about the entire letter? Does even Dobson have blind supporters? Wow. 

  Also, notice that Dobson says "You can write as many long winded paragraphs as you want, I’m just gonna hit delete." Except he clearly did not do just THAT, either. =P

   So here it is, uncut! 

    -F7

 Dear Mr. Dobson,

Hi, again. You seem confused by the e-mail I sent you recently, so I'm going to help you out!

I knew you would post my letter on Facebook so you could publicly laugh at it, and make it seem as if yet another 'troll' is bothering you. That's okay, for now I know how to correct you.

-You brought up 'straw men' for no reason. No where did I use the term, or accuse you of doing any such thing. Hmmm. Also, you failed to explain how my letter is an example of a 'straw man.' If you need examples of what the term means, you can easily look up examples you yourself have made. Hey, the work is already done for you.

-You claim I 'put words in [your] mouth' and made 'imaginary points [you] never brought up'. I certainly did no such thing. I either quoted you directly, paraphrased something you did, in fact, actually say, or proposed questions for you to answer, as opposed to making statements. Here is a fresh example of just that; you can distinguish between a statement and a question, can you not?

If you need some evidence, I've sure got it!

-On July 25 of probably 2016, when the Ghostbusters remake was released, you did in fact say to @MarcBaker3- “HAHAHAHA, oh wait you're being serious? Let me laugh louder: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHABAHA”. I paraphrased you here, in my previous letter. Apologies for not including your original typo. I also stand by what I originally said; this was an extremely childish and unprofessional reaction from you.

-I am uncertain of the date on this one, but I can give you a reference link. In discussing The Last Jedi with Jeffrey LaTour, you did basically say he was a Nazi for disagreeing with you, and not liking The Last Jedi. You stated “It's called a critique on society. Which is why this movie is more important than any other Star Wars movie. This movie actually says something about society. The fact you don't like that, makes me think you're on the side of the nazi allegory stand ins.” [emphasis added] You see, he didn't have the same opinions as you regarding the movie, so you felt it was necessary to imply he's a member of the Fourth Reich. What else is 'on the side of' supposed to mean?

You further emphasize this in a later post on April 5, 2018-- “When people criticize TLJ, watch specifically what they throw out as reasons why it “sucks.” You can tell a lot about a person by what they value and identify with. And if they’re upset the Nazi analogs aren’t being portrayed as serious, then maybe what they value isn’t something you should listen to or agree with.”

There are a lot of reasons why many fans did not like The Last Jedi. What I get from your statement is, 'if you don't agree with MY views exactly, you're clearly a Nazi!' Can you explain what else this means? People are not allowed to see the movie any differently than you without being Nazis somehow? What kind of sense does that make? As I said last time, this is high school-level nonsense.

Here's a link to that conversation! https://hypocrisyofandrewdobson.tumblr.com/post/172644630387/yes-he-actually-accused-someone-of-this-and-the

-I directly quoted you when you stated “ we literally can’t due to economic reasons”, in regards to growing up, on January 27. You can't defend yourself there.

So I hope you can now see I put no words in your mouth; however, you are putting your own foot in your mouth. How is it?

I see you had fun in the comments section of your post. But let's address some of your concerns!

-No, my father would not be in his 90's today. Even if he was....so what? Are you against the elderly?

-A very brief history lesson: the Great Depression lasted from 1929-1939. I did not say my father was born on the first day of the Depression. He was not. He grew up during its time though. Even after the official end of the Depression, times were still hard for a lot of people. It did not end for many right away in 1939. You probably didn't know, or care. You said this was 'the best part'. Please, tell me why. Why does that amuse you?

-I am not in my 50's OR 60's! Would it surprise you I'm not even quite in my 40's yet? But again, that's relevant because why?

-I did not say you directly insulted my father. Good luck trying, by the way. However, your notion that there is an apparent dollar value attached to 'growing up' IS generally insulting to people living or who have lived in hardships. Yes, I am aware a lot of Millennials are having hard times, and some go back to living with their parents and such. But many of them are not doing so because they are not 'grown up' or 'can't grow up,' especially because they lack an amount of money you still refuse to name. I don't think you understand this, nor do you understand the concept of 'growing up.'

Well, we had some fun, right? I hope this clears a few things up for you!

Have a nice day!

-F7

“You know, I would have never guessed that this is the letter Dobson was referring to in that Facebook post of his. But then again, I think it’s safe to assume he didn’t actually read either email fully and just wanted to complain and mock you for sending it, Email Anon. Thanks for sending a copy!” -THOAD

[acreativeintrovert-blog]

So today's talk was on who we allow to mold our thinking. God, or this world under the rule of Satan? At Romans 12:2, we are counseled: “Stop being molded by this system of things, but be transformed by making your mind over, so that you may prove to yourselves the good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” Those inspired words show that whatever molded our thinking before we learned about God, it is possible to bring our thoughts into closer harmony with God’s. Does it really matter who molds our thinking? Why is it beneficial that we allow God to mold our thinking? Why do some people refuse to allow God to mold their thinking? And how can we protect ourselves from developing the thinking of this world?

•

Consider the situation between Jesus and Peter. Jesus, the one they expected to restore Israel’s kingdom, said that he would soon suffer and die. It was the apostle Peter who spoke up. “Be kind to yourself, Lord,” he said. “You will not have this happen to you at all.” Jesus countered: “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me, because you think, not God’s thoughts, but those of men.”—Matt. 16:21-23; Acts 1:6. Jesus made a distinction between thoughts that originate with God and thoughts that originate with this world under Satan’s control. (1 John 5:19) Peter echoed the self-sparing attitude of the world. But Jesus knew that his Father’s thinking was different. He knew that God wanted him to brace himself for the suffering and death that awaited him. Jesus' instant reply was a clear rejection of that worldly thinking, in favor of the thinking of his father. It's not always easy to align our thinking or viewpoint to God's. Actually, doing so requires a deliberate effort. On the other hand, it's all too easy to absorb the world’s thinking. That is because the spirit of the world is all around us. (Eph. 2:2) and because it often appeals to self-interest, the world’s way of thinking can be enticing.

•

Why might some actually resist allowing someone to mold their thinking? It's a growing trend lately, this whole "do what you want", "don't let anyone tell you what to do", “I think for myself,” movement. They want to make their own decisions and that is proper to do so. They do not wish to be controlled, nor do they want to surrender their individuality. But really, even the most independent of thinkers cannot avoid being influenced. Whether contemplating something so profound as the origin of life or simply deciding what to wear, people are to some degree affected by others. We can, however, choose whom we will allow to influence us. We're not giving up our individuality by molding our view point and thinking to that of God's. Much the opposite. 2 Corinthians 3:17 brings out that where the spirit of God is, there is freedom. God allowed us the freedom to develop unique personalities, and interestes. But there are some restrictions. When it comes to issues of right and wrong, God wants us to be guided by his thinking as revealed in his Word. Is this overly restrictive, or is it beneficial?

•

Considering something everyone of us is familiar with. That of parents and children. Parents set rules, rules to protect and guide their children. They try to instill values in them to be honest, considerate, and kind people. They're not being restrictive, no, they're trying to raise their children to be capable adults. If the children choose to live within the values that they learned from their parents, they will be more likely to make decisions that they will not later regret. As a result, they will be free from many self-induced troubles and anxieties. God is that parent. He is our Father. Like a good parent, God wants his children to have the most fulfilling life possible. He therefore provides basic principles for moral conduct and for behavior toward others. In such matters he invites us to cultivate his very way of thinking and to share his values. It helps us make choices that lead to happiness while still allowing us to blossom as individuals. In the long run, it is beneficial for us.

•

While the world as tried to offer advice on moral conduct, family relationships, job satisfaction, and other aspects of life. Much of it is out of harmony with godsG thinking. For example, self-promotion is often encouraged. So is tolerance of sexual immorality. Separation and divorce for frivolous reasons are sometimes advised as a means of achieving greater happiness. Not even the growing advancing technology, or higher education (nothing can be as high as learning about God though. Isa. 55:9) but none of it has been able to solve the major problems that stand in the way of happiness, such as war, racism, and crime. Moses, for example, was educated “in all the wisdom of the Egyptians,” he looked to God for “a heart of wisdom.” (Acts 7:22; Ps. 90:12) He also petitioned God: “Make me know your ways.” (Ex. 33:13) The apostle Paul was an intelligent and learned man, yet, when it came to matters of principle, he rejected worldly wisdom. Instead, he based his reasoning on the Scriptures.

•

So how can we avoid having how thoughts molded to the world? For one, we must stop taking into our minds ideas or viewpoints that are in opposition to God’s. And we need to start taking in God's thoughts, his words through the Bible. We need to dwell and meditate on how He views things. We cant serve two masters. But it's impossible to avoid contact with the world entirely, after all kids need to go to school, and we need to go to work. Some exposure to its ideas is inescapable. However, where contact with ungodly views is unavoidable, we certainly need not entertain them or accept them. Like Jesus, we should be quick to reject thoughts that serve Satan’s purpose.

•

But we can protect ourselves from unnecessary exposure. One way, is that we should exercise caution when choosing our close friends. The Bible warns that if we keep close company with people who do not worship God, their thinking will rub off on us. Take King Solomon for example. God gave him wisdom. But King Solomon was influenced by his foreign wives and was lead astray from God to worship false ones. Another thing is by being selective when choosing entertainment. By rejecting entertainment that promotes the theory of evolution, violence, or immorality, we avoid poisoning our thinking with ideas that are against the knowledge of God. We need to be very careful. Satan likes to make things appear harmless, sudtle. For example, a news report might be angled in such a way so as to favor certain political opinions. Some movies and books promote the “me first” and “family first” philosophies, making them seem reasonable, appealing, even right. Even some children’s stories, though otherwise unobjectionable, may subtly lay the groundwork for accepting immoral behavior. One of the lady's in my congregation, who has a 5 year old, mentioned that Clifford, you know, the big red dog, well in one of the books recently has mentioned Cliffords dad having a boyfriend. Even directed to little kids now, they're trying to make it all acceptable. The feminist movement, one I'll admit I got caught up in, while the idea is great- considering God had intended women to be respected and treated equal- has a few snares. One is the topic of abortion. They cover it with the saying "Her body, her choice" But that's that same selfish reasoning that Peter had showed.

•

Remember, there are basically two sources of information—God and the world under Satan’s control. By which source are we being molded? The answer is, the source from which we obtain information. If we take in the world’s ideas, these will mold our thinking, inclining us toward fleshly points of view and behavior. That is why it is vital that we guard what we allow our minds to dwell on.

[initiare]

BASICS:

Name: Manon, but I’ve gone by the alias of Sae on the internet since I was about 12 or 13. It’s really stuck and caught on so much over the years that it’s as commonly used as Manon is, if not more (both online and offline). Age: 29.  Pronouns: She/her.  Sexuality: Hetero. Zodiac sign: Cancer.  Taken or single: Single.

Four Things About This Blog:

1. Still unsure of how this worked exactly, but I’d decided to make a blog for Jace before I’d ever read (or seen) anything about him directly. A friend of mine had been in the fandom and I’d heard about him through her, enough that I’d peeked at a few basic bits on the wiki. And then one morning I woke up with this intense yet unexplainable urge to make him, this character that I knew next to nothing about. I read the first three books within a week and then I decided to launch him. I’ve never had a muse arise to the occasion quite in this manner, but then again, isn't this Jace we’re talking about? Nothing about him follows the status quo.

2. If I’d picked up the books without ever having heard anything about any character in specific prior to reading, I would’ve still likely found myself drawn to Jace’s character— but I would’ve made a blog for Valentine instead. They both appeal to me for different reasons, but ultimately, I’m very glad that I made Jace and I don’t regret not having made a blog for Valentine for a single instant.

3. I’m an exceedingly opinionated person with very set norms/values and they definitely make their appearance within my OOC posts, and they’re not always popular opinions ‘round these here Tumblr parts by any means. However, I don’t let them influence my perspective when it comes to writing for Jace (or any of my muses). Of course, I may recognize some or many aspects, but I make it an effort and personal challenge to look at everything from as many angles as I can as to obtain the widest picture of any character’s behavior or any situation.

4. Despite them not being in full view as they used to be, my tags have been described as being the ‘arteries’ of my blog(s) and I couldn't possibly agree more. If you don’t read them, you’re easily missing out on 80/90% of my meta’ing. My posts tend to have some coherency to them, some logic, but in my tags you find my incoherency and that’s my heart and my passion. That’s where I’m most alive.

Three Mun Facts:

1. I recognize that I’m incredibly headstrong and it’s both my gift and curse. While it’s gotten me in the occasional trouble because I realize that I’m being too stubborn a bit too late, there have been and are a lot of moments where I’ve used it to my advantage and I profit from it immensely in numerous ways. So while I could condemn it as a flaw, it very much hits the extremes on both ends of the spectrum.

2. I’ve got fire for a heart, I’m not scared of the dark; you’ve never seen it look so easy. Okay, so two days ago, I had a day of massive cleaning. This always goes hand in hand with music playing, I sing and dance (of which I can only successfully do the latter). Youtube went through related videos, it somehow got to One Direction. I used to unfairly hate them on principle because I heard them everywhere and everyone loved them; in the same light, Harry Styles was always the one I disliked the most because he was everyone’s favorite. Since that day, I’ve listened to their non-Zayn stuff a fair bit and it’s catchy, I guess I’m a very late fan. All good. Nobody can drag me doooowwwwn.

3. A lot of my thick skin stems from being able to properly put the right weight to people’s words. And I'm able to do that because I value’s people’s actions infinitely more than I do their words. It’s so very easy to say or type ‘yes’ or ‘no’, but if your actions don’t reflect your state of mind or your statements, then I lose respect. We’re all guilty of falling short of this every now and again, myself included; we’re all human after all, but once or twice doesn’t equal constantly.

EXPERIENCE:

How’d you start: Tumblr back in August of 2012 is when I started in the world of RP’ing. I made Tatia Petrova from TVD (I went by the url herbloodlacedtheirwine). I never really dabbled much into the world of writing before that, except little snippets in early high school as to practice and try to further my English. Platforms you’ve used: Tumblr. Best experience: While the TMI/TSC fandom definitely has its bad apples and I’ve been in fandoms where things were consistently calmer, I do find my best experience to have been here because of specific individuals I’ve met while here. However, my Tumblr experience has overall been really good since my Ezio blog. I had a field day writing him and people seemed to really appreciate my input on his character. Beyond that, his blog was also from which I released my themes and I’ll forever remember all the positive feedback I've gotten on them. Despite this site not easily showing it, there are a lot of people with a heart of gold out there. Worst experience: I’ve never exactly found myself in a really bad situation that I can refer to it as the ‘worst’, as I tend to nip things in the bud but I’m also someone who mentally catalogs things quickly, it’s how I deal with things. That and awarding stuff the weight it deserves and not a shred more— numerous things that I use to generally avoid things from getting very bad or affecting me more than I want them to.

MUSE PREFERENCES:

Original or canon: Canon every time. Favourite face: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Jamie Campbell Bower, Toby Regbo. Least favorite face: Actors or actresses that play the main protagonists in usually a show, as they tend to become over-used FCs.  Note: I have zero problem with these actresses or actors themselves, I just get tired of seeing everyone use them even outside of canon characters played by them. —To name a few examples in past and present: Nina Dobrev, Ian Somerhalder, Emilia Clarke, Katherine McNamara and Dominic Sherwood.  Multi or single: Running a multi isn't something for me, but I don’t mind writing with them in whatsoever way. Kudos and respect to multi muse blogs for having the mind to be so organized, though. I couldn't do it.

WRITING PREFERENCES:

Plots or memes: Plots, although I enjoy responding to memes on Jace as crack and light type of threads so fit him quite well, they’re a nice change from the immense angst that can be done in threads. Best time to write: I used to think the night, but looking back at threads and timestamps; apparently some of my strongest writing was done in the afternoon or early evening. Problem is, I don’t always have time to write a lot during those times. An issue? Yes, yes it is. Do you like your muse(s):  I rarely make new muses, when I do, there’s a reason. So yes. How long (months/years?): For my current blogs? Jace’s blog was created in November 2017. Francis was made... July 2017 and Ezio in May of 2016. I’ve made no other muses since Ezio and any before him have been permanently archived. Fluff, angst or smut: Angst/fluff, I’ve no interest in smut as it’s written on Tumblr.

Tagged by; @takeseffort tagging; @deusidvult (come on Shae, please make me feel less bad for writing so much by outdoing me), @beastmade, @leuthros, @audacatrix, @edomson, @snakedhand. Who else do I usually tag, uhm, @cainmarked, @xncertainty. Anyone else? Say I tagged you. <3

[dickinsonstate]

Hawk's Perch - October 2018

My father had a couple of years of college and my mother earned her G.E.D. later in her life. I’m the second person in my immediate family to earn a bachelor’s degree and the only one to go to graduate school. When I came to Dickinson State University in 2002 as an Assistant Professor of Art, I never dreamed I would one day be the Dean of Instruction, much less the Associate Provost.

In 2017, I was granted a sabbatical that allowed me to participate in the Change Network ND. The

Change Network provides North Dakotans, South Dakotans, and the region’s 12 Native Nations with a supportive learning environment to lead more equitable and inclusive change within their organizations and communities. In August 2018, I was appointed by Governor Burgum to serve on the North Dakota Council on the Arts Board.

None of these opportunities would have been available to me if I had not been encouraged to seek out a college degree. Higher Education is at a critical juncture in our country. Dickinson State University has talented faculty, staff, and campus leaders that can work together to find new solutions for the future. I believe it is critical we work across departments, and program content areas, to identify the type of curriculum and programs that will continue to transform education. As Dean, I’m most interested in using collaboration, creativity, and culture to empower people through this process. Higher Education has a rich tradition, I don’t want to see change just for the sake of change, but I believe Higher Education must innovate if we’re to remain relevant.

Research shows the traditional age student pool has been shrinking. We need to continue to provide educational programs for the traditional student population, but we also need to attract, and serve, people that are already working. We must provide programs they need at a time, and in a manner that fits their lives. This may not be in a “traditional” schedule. It can be done if we collaborate, do our research and get creative.

Our collaboration extends to the community. The Dickinson Public Library and the DSU Art program plan to move the film darkroom and printmaking equipment into the new maker space the Library is building. I envision internship opportunities within those spaces for our students to assist community members with equipment and processes. DSU is already working to make it easier for local businesses to connect to our students for internships. According to our most recent graduate exit survey, over 40 percent of the students surveyed had completed internships while in school. Internships benefit both local industry and students.

In talking with Darrell Neubert, Business Advisor for the Dickinson Small Business Development Center, there is need within local business for individuals who are website developers, graphic designers and content writers. We will begin exploring the possibility of having an “incubator” program that allows graphic design and writing majors to gain professional experience while helping entrepreneurs.  This concept could be expanded to other majors, such as agriculture, business, finance, marketing, and natural sciences. There are so many possibilities for collaboration.

In addition to academic curriculum, cultural opportunities and activities help to make a community one that people want to call home. Institutions that foster cultural experiences add value to communities. According to the Americans for the Arts 2018 Public Opinion Poll, “Whether people engage with the arts or not, 90 percent believe cultural facilities (theaters, museums, sculpture parks, neighborhood arts centers) improve quality of life, and 86 percent believe cultural facilities are important to local business and the economy.” DSU serves as regional hub for culture and arts, hosting regional competitions, theatre, dance and music events throughout the year. As host or partner, this role is one we will continue to encourage and support.

The new mural underpass downtown is an example of this collaboration. The project had over 50 volunteers participate in painting it as of Oct. 17. Also, the mural artist held two workshops with clients at Arc Creations. The mural is funded through a $10,000 National Endowment of the Arts grant written by Western Wellness, $10,000 matching funds from the City of Dickinson, and additional support from the Change Network ND. I believe through creative collaborations we can bring even greater vitality to our campus and community.

Each person has their own unique story. I am honored to share part of my story, and my vision for DSU with you. Education is transformational and empowering. As our community continues to evolve to meet the changing world, Dickinson State University plays an integral role providing access to high quality educational and cultural opportunities. As Dean, I’m most interested in using collaboration, creativity, and culture to empower people through this process. I look forward to what we will accomplish together.

Sincerely,

Marilyn Lee, associate provost and dean of instruction