#i do not have the hours in the day to do this all in advance
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Ojitos Lindos
Summary:
A fresh-faced DEA agent, new to Colombia, has zero time for Javier Peña after he leaves her hanging once.
Paring: Javier Peña x F!Reader
Warnings: 18+MDNI, Swearing, Kissing, heavy petting, protected sex, oral, butt stuff kinda? Drug use, Mention of weapons and kidnap.
Word Count: 10.4K
A/N: Jesus Christ, this one really got out of hand. I always do this, I need to learn how to stop yapping and make my stories shorter lol. I apologize in advance for this one guys. Anyways, I hope you like this one.
You were an idiot. Plain and simple. You’d done dumb, even dangerous shit in college, but this? This was next level. Pathetic. And you knew it. Still, you couldn’t stop the flush in your cheeks every time the restaurant door swung open.
You were smart—everyone had told you your whole life. Top of your class, with a dual degree in Criminology and International Relations. So, how could you fall for something like this? Life just had to knock you on your ass at least once, and apparently, this was the time.
Stirring the cherry in your rum and coke, you noticed your lipstick had smudged from the copious times you'd licked your lips raw. It was hopeless. When you slammed the pesos on the table and stormed out, there was only one thing you were certain of.
Fuck Javier Peña.
Right after the New Year, you transferred to the DEA’s Colombia office—a move you had meticulously planned for years. This was the culmination of countless late nights spent buried in textbooks while your peers were out living their carefree college days. Now, in your mid-twenties, you have the credentials and the career to validate your sacrifices.
The initial weeks felt like stepping into a dream. The sunlit days, the vibrant culture, and the sense of purpose invigorated you. You had bought a new wardrobe to handle Colombia’s sweltering heat, eager to embrace the change in climate and your life. This was your moment—a chance to shed the reserved persona and finally unlock the vibrant, confident woman you had always felt trapped beneath layers of responsibility and caution.
That's why, after your first week, when Agent Peña noticed you, it felt like everything was falling into place. He was unbelievably handsome, undeniably skilled at his job, and you couldn't help but notice had a tight ass in even tighter jeans. It was a heady combination—one that made you think, just for a moment, that maybe things would go your way.
He asked you out in that casual, sly way—one that should've been a red flag. Right by the copy machine, just as you bent down to grab a manila folder. But you didn’t see it then. You were new, and no one had warned you—not that you would have listened. So, you got ready hours in advance, took a taxi to the restaurant, and waited.
He never showed. Not a word afterward either, no acknowledgment that you’d waited over two hours at the place he told you to meet him. From that moment on, you swore you’d give him a hard time whenever you could. Javier, with his stupid smug grin, annoyingly handsome face, and the infuriating way he slipped under your skin like he had a map to all your weak spots.
You turn the corner just as you hear footsteps behind you. Glancing over your shoulder, the familiar rush of irritation bubbles to the surface. The hair on the back of your neck stands as if pointing you toward danger.
Speak of the devil, and he shall appear…
Strolling down the hallway with that damned confident swagger. Agent Peña makes long strides as he matches your speed and walks beside you. He cocks his head to the side, lips twitching up into a smirk.
“Cariño, you look better and better each day.” his voice is sultry and smooth like a chocolate bar left out in the sun all day.
“Agent Peña,” your voice is professional, cold, distant—eyes narrowing to a tunnel vision before you.
“You wound me with your integrity. I think as friends, we are on a first-name basis now,” he replies, hand on his chest in false hurt.
You bite back a sharp retort, feeling a knot of frustration curl in your stomach. "We are not friends; we are coworkers, if that," you respond, your voice as chilly as a sheet of ice. Your steps quicken as you wish the hallway would end, your mind swirling with one question—how did he even find you down here, in the quiet, shadowy corners of the DEA?
He keeps pace, his presence unwavering. “Ah, come on now,” he says, the edge of amusement in his voice. “You can’t tell me we haven’t already crossed that line.” His tone is a smirk, lingering in the air like perfume, but you don’t give him the satisfaction of a response.
“There is no line,” you retort.
"I see your professionalism hasn't dulled your beauty," Peña murmurs, his voice dripping with that same sultry warmth.
He walks a little closer, his head turned towards you, not hiding the subtle delight in his eyes. "Come on, you can’t be that cold, cariño. You and I know what happens when ice melts…” he bumps your shoulder and you stop midstride. He walks a little further before stopping, half turning back. He’s wearing one of his formal suits, a blue button up underneath a cream suit jacket.
“What do you want?” You can tell he’s not here for pleasantries. He’s got that look in his eyes—like he’s got something in mind, and it sure as hell isn’t sweet small talk. He turns back to face you, observing you slowly, taking in how your hair falls differently today and how your heels click a bit louder on the floor.
He smirks, shifts his jaw, then parts his lips. “What makes you think I want something?”
You can almost hear the defensiveness in his voice, but you’re not fooled. You tilt your head, unimpressed. “I think we both know ‘bullshit’ is your middle name.”
He chuckles low, a sound that’s almost a warning in itself. “Such a blunt little thing. Colombia’s rubbed off on you, huh?”
You don’t flinch, meeting his gaze with a steady stare. “Am I wrong?”
He smirks, his eyes never leaving yours. He takes a slow, deliberate step closer, closing the distance between you just enough to make things feel... interesting. His lips curl up at the corners as if savoring the tension.
“Bullshit, huh?” he murmurs, leaning in slightly, his voice dropping to that smooth, almost too confident tone. “Guess I’ve been called worse.”
You cross your arms, standing your ground. “Cut the shit. You need access to a file, right? Which one?”
His smile falters briefly, but he regains his cool almost immediately. “I was hoping you could help me with that.”
You raise an eyebrow, looking at the files in your arms, the top stamped ‘confidential.’ “Do you have authorization? Papers, forms...?”
He shifts his weight, the slightest trace of impatience flickering behind his casual demeanor. “I don’t have time for red tape.”
You don’t back down, your gaze unwavering. “Did you fill out the proper forms? Because without them, I’m afraid you’re out of luck.”
His smirk is still there, but there’s a glint in his eyes now—amusement mixed with a hint of challenge. “Well, I’ll just have to talk you into it.”
You shake your head, not giving in. “Not without the right paperwork. You know the rules.”
He takes another step forward, just enough to make the air between you thicken. “I’m starting to think you’re more trouble than you’re worth.”
You feel your lips twitch into a smirk. “Maybe. But I’m also the one with the file you want.”
He smirks right back, intrigued but not ready to let it go. “Do me this favor, Please, Solo esta vez.” He says it so sweetly, reaching over to brush his fingertips against your arm, brown eyes so tender.
You feel the pull of his gaze but keep your composure. “No hay favores sin autorización, Peña.” You make sure your words are clear—no favors without authorization.
It feels exhilarating to stand in his way, to deny him what he expects—or, in this case, what he asks so damn nicely. There’s a quiet power in it as he fixes his gaze on you, his eyes flicking down to the file on top of the stack. You can almost feel the weight of the unspoken history behind his gaze—he's probably never heard "no" before, not as a child, and certainly not now. And in this moment, it feels sweeter than it should to be the one who says it.
“Huh,” he scoffs after a moment. "Maybe Colombia’s been good for you after all."
You walk away, pointedly ignoring him, praying he isn’t watching your ass with every sway of your hips. You focus instead on your route, heading back to drop off the files. A small, satisfied smile tugs at your lips as you make your way to your office, the image of his disappointed expression lingering in your mind.
As you finish packing up for the day, Camila appears at the foot of your office, her purse casually slung over her shoulder.
“We’re heading out for drinks. You in?” Camila asks, shifting her weight from one foot to the other as you collect your keys.
A fleeting thought crosses your mind—refusing due to the bottle of chardonnay waiting for you at home. But something holds you back. It’s Friday. You’ve been telling yourself you’d break out of your shell this year, that being a homebody wasn’t part of the plan.
“Yeah,” you say, the words slipping out before you can second-guess yourself. “Sounds fun.”
While finishing your makeup, you sip a glass of wine, the soft hum of anticipation building as you call for a taxi. The click of your heels echoes in the stairwell, a near stumble reminding you of their height as you descend from your apartment. When you arrive at the bar, your eyes sweep the room, spotting your coworkers. The black, form-fitting dress you chose hugs your curves, drawing more than a few glances as you enter.
“There you are!” Camila calls out over the pulsating music as you approach the bar. She flashes a grin and motions toward a lively group in the corner, some engrossed in darts, others deep in conversation. “We’ve got a table over there.”
Your gaze sweeps over the group, a soft smile tugging at your lips as Camila adds your drink to her tab.
“Is she new?” you murmur, subtly nodding toward the striking blonde in the blazing red dress. The fabric clings to her tall frame, accentuating her height—she even towers over you in your heels.
Camila squints, following your gaze, her eyes widening in recognition when they land on the woman.
“Fresh out of college, filling the front desk position,” she leans in, her voice low in your ear. You purse your lips, remembering what it felt like to be the new blood in a den of lions.
“How’s she doing?” you ask.
Camila shrugs. “Can’t type for shit, but she’s picking it up. We all start somewhere.”
You nod, taking a sip from your drink, letting the conversation settle with a quiet understanding.
You settle in with your coworkers, the laughter and music blending into a comforting backdrop. The evening feels light and carefree until a quiet ripple of attention shifts the mood at your table. Curious, you glance over your shoulder to see what’s caught their focus.
There he is—Agent Peña, standing impossibly close to the new hire. She’s leaning casually against the bar top, her elbows resting on the worn wood, while he hovers beside her, his arm resting just behind her back. His light-wash jeans fit snugly, the red button-up tucked in just enough to emphasize his lean waist.
A flicker of something stirs in your chest—a memory, a pang of annoyance. You almost scoff but catch yourself, the sight all too familiar. Not long ago, you were the naive girl standing in her place, drawn into his web of effortless charm.
“What a man-whore,” you mutter to the women beside you. They nod, silent yet captivated, unable to deny the allure of watching him work. His moves are calculated yet smooth, like how he leans in to light the cigarette resting between her lips, a faint smirk playing at the corners of his mouth.
"I heard he sleeps with women to get information about the guerrillas," Camila says, the rumor so absurd it almost makes you laugh. But then again, you have no idea what happens beyond the office walls. Your world is confined to the stale scent of cigarettes and the endless rustle of paper.
"Why would they risk their lives for sex...with him?" you say, the disbelief apparent in your voice, tinged with laughter. The alcohol is loosening your tongue, making you bolder than usual.
Camila leans in, her tone more serious as she says your name, drawing the attention of the women at the table, who suddenly avert their eyes. "There’s got to be a reason he sleeps around, right? Maybe he’s just... really good at it?" she suggests, and you scoff, shaking your head. You don’t believe that; no one could be that good at sex.
Isabel nods, and a few other women follow suit. You swallow hard, the realization settling heavily in your chest: he’d slept with all of them, used them. The looks of quiet resignation on their faces send a sharp pang through you as they watch him, a silent understanding shared between them.
A heavy silence lingers at the table, the weight of old wounds too much to bear. You can’t stand it anymore. Standing up, you excuse yourself without a word, heading to the bar to order one last drink before closing out for the night.
“Let me get this one,” you hear and feel someone slip in beside you. It's Agent Murphy, and he offers you a warm smile. Of the two, you always preferred Murphy. He was respectful—always saying "please" and "thank you," never once flirting with you. You’d even shared dinners with his wife at his home several times. If the DEA building were on fire, you’d choose to save Steve over Peña without a second thought. Did that make you a bad person?
“How are you getting home?” he asks, his tone casual as he slides a few pesos onto the bar before turning to face the crowd, his back to the counter.
“Probably a taxi. I didn’t bring my car,” you reply, nursing your drink as the two of you watch the ebb and flow of people around you.
“Let me give ya a ride home,” he says, and you feel the familiar burn of alcohol easing in your chest.
“I’ll be fine, really. It’s out of your way,” you wave him off, trying to sound casual. You’ve never had an issue with taxis before, and the pepper spray in your purse gives you some comfort. Not to mention, you’re no stranger to self-defense.
“Don’t argue with me,” he replies, lifting his beer to his lips. “Connie’d kill me if she found out I let you take a damn taxi in this country.”
You exhale a sigh, nodding at his insistence. His chivalry is almost endearing in its persistence. You glance at Peña, a fleeting thought passing through your mind: Why couldn’t he be more like Murphy? Your gaze then diverts to the table, where the women still observe Peña and the new hire. They’re tangled together now, their mouths colliding, the kiss hungry and unrestrained, leaving little to the imagination.
You look away, trying to hold it together and avoid vomiting on the bar floor.
“Javier still asking for favors?” Murphy asks, pulling your focus back to him.
“He knows the answer’s always no. Whatever he wants, it’s not coming from me. I’ve got to stick to the rules, even if the rest of them are crooked,” you say, setting your empty glass down on the bar.
“I told ‘em to stop asking, especially with the promotion and all,” he mutters. But there’s no stopping Peña—not even Murphy. You haven’t forgotten about the promotion you’ve been working your ass off for. Every move you make, every time you tell Peña to fuck off, is a gamble. One wrong step, and you’ll be screwed, even for eyes like those.
“I can handle him,” you say softly, turning to look at the two again, but it’s just the blonde.
You can feel the shift in the air as you stand there before seeing him. Peña approaches—slow and deliberate like he’s got all the time in the world. He stops short of invading your personal space, his presence almost suffocating.
“You two look cozy,” His voice is low, and despite himself, there's that smirk—cocky, lewd, and dangerously familiar. The red neon lights create shadows across his features. He looks devilish, like any second, and he’ll grow horns to match his attitude.
You don’t give him the satisfaction of a reaction, but you can feel your pulse quicken. Even when he’s being a jerk, there’s something magnetic about him, like a tension waiting to snap. It must be the alcohol. You had never seen him while you were drinking and avoided seeing him outside of work at all costs.
"I didn’t realize you moonlighted as a comedian, Peña," you mutter, trying to inject a bit of bite into your words, hoping it'll deter him. But he doesn’t flinch. Instead, he tilts his head and slowly swigs his beer. You watch the movement in his throat as it dips, the faint trace of lipstick marking his jaw and neck.
“Ay, cariño, you always know how to keep things interesting,” he says, his tone smooth, not missing a beat.
"Who are you trying to impress here, Peña? It's exhausting." you feel your cheeks flush with anger but attempt to suppress it. But it’s hard, so hard, when all he does is use people. And the alcohol makes it so easy to rip him a new one, bite his head off, or ruin his night. All you knew was he twisted something inside you, and you didn’t know how to uncoil that.
"Impress? Not trying to impress anyone," Peña says with a slight smirk, looking at Murphy like he’ll have his back, his voice low and relaxed. "I just do what I do. If it bothers you, that's on you." He shifts his weight and juts a hip out. His eyes study you, your body, and your face like he's trying to figure something out. Then he shrugs, "But you sure seem like you’re trying to impress me, though."
Your cheeks flush bright red at his false accusation. No, you did not dress to impress anyone, let alone Javier fucking Pena. No way.
“I would never try to impress you, never.” you spit, glancing at Murphy. He gives you an amused smirk as he watches you two square up. Like he knows something you don’t. Ugh, not him too. You hoped Pena wasn’t rubbing off on him.
"Sure thing, cariño," he says, flashing a grin as he drags his tongue across his pink bottom lip—the one that juts out whenever he's upset, lost in thought, or buried in paperwork. Damn.
You stomp away, shaking your head, trying to shake off the frustration. You round the table, offering a quick goodbye to the women before grabbing your purse. As you head for the door, you pass the blonde woman, the compact in her hand as she reapplies her lipstick. You feel a pang of sympathy for her, but you're not about to come off as a bitch. So, instead, you do the only thing you know how to do—take another shot at Peña.
"Hey, you’re new here, right?" you ask, your tone soft and genuine. It's not the kind of conversation you typically start with, but something about her makes you feel bad. She snaps her compact closed with a quick flick, and her smile catches you off guard momentarily. It’s an innocent, almost naïve expression, and for reasons you can’t fully explain, it makes your chest tighten. She looks over at Peña briefly before meeting your eyes again, her expression shifting, maybe uncertain but hopeful.
"Yeah—" she begins, but you don’t let her finish.
"Whatever you do, don’t sleep with Agent Peña," you say, your voice low but pointed, trying and failing to suppress the hint of amusement tugging at your lips. "He’s got a bad case of crabs. Like antibiotic resistant, gave it to the whole second floor."
You almost smile at how her face shifts between disgust and disbelief, but you keep your composure as Peña steps into the conversation. He glances between the two of you, a smirk on his lips.
"Good evening, ladies," he says, his voice smooth and effortless.
"Buenas noches," you reply smugly. You turn and walk away, not sparing them another glance, leaving the air between them thick with confusion. Behind you, you can hear her reaction—sharp, disgusted, and Peña, as usual, too slow to understand what just happened.
“I don’t even wanna know,” Murphy laughs, shaking his head as you both step out of the bar.
The next day, the Mercado is lively in the early morning, bustling with vendors shouting over one another to draw in customers. The air smells of ripe fruit and freshly baked bread, the sharp tang of herbs mixing with the earthy scent of soil. Stalls line the narrow paths, overflowing with vibrant produce. The morning sun casts long shadows on the ground, but the heat is already rising, making the place hum.
You’re wearing shorts, a tank top, and a flowy white blouse as the breeze flows past you. You wander slowly, letting the vibrant colors and sounds wash over you. You don’t quite know what you’re looking for, but moving through the crowd feels like something small you can control in a still unknown place.
Bending down to get a better look at the fruit before you, the market’s chaos continues—loud, alive, but somehow distant.
Then, a sudden shift. As if the air seems to tighten, the market buzz fading as you hear a purposeful, smooth clearing of a throat behind you. And it's like the space around you narrows because that subtle sound is something you could recognize in a crowded room. Or a busy market. Without even turning around, you know it’s him.
“Well, well, I thought you’d be nursing a hangover,” Peña says, his voice a little too easy, like he had been waiting for this moment. Waiting around every corner, like he’d orchestrated it.
"Are you following me?" The words slip out, half accusation, half curiosity. You don't need to look over your shoulder to know he’s standing there, one hip out. His presence becomes more like a shadow at your back—unavoidable, unsettling.
Peña’s chuckle rumbles behind you, low and unbothered, as if the question amuses him more than it irritates. The tension in the air seems to pull tighter, and for a moment, you wonder if you could even breathe properly. His proximity, that unmistakable energy he carries, presses into your space, making you feel more aware of him than the people around you.
The moment hangs there for a beat before Peña speaks again, his words now threaded with a sense of casual authority. “Maybe. Or maybe I just know where you like to shop.” There’s no mistaking the teasing in his voice now, the hint of a smile lurking behind his words.
You take a step forward, the weight of his gaze on you like a constant pull. But you refuse to let it show—refuse to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s successfully annoyed you. Instead, you keep walking steadily to create distance, though the space seems to shrink with every step.
He doesn’t follow immediately. For a moment, the market feels normal again. The chatter of vendors, the shuffling of shoes. Everything around you is mundane and ordinary. But you know, without turning, that he’s still there. That he’s watching, sunglasses low on his arched nose, casting a cool shadow over the sharp lines of his face. His presence isn’t loud but it sure is undeniable, and you can feel the hair on your neck rise.
The deli vendor shifts his gaze between you and Peña, clearly caught in the tension. Peña leans forward just slightly, his voice a soft, almost bored command. “Get the filet; it’s more tender, and for godsakes, get the cut from the back, por favor.”
You barely register the vendor’s nod as you drag your attention away from Peña’s words. You fix your gaze on the glass display of meats, a silent war playing out in your head. You adjust the weight of the produce bag slung over your shoulder. It’s heavier than you remember, or maybe your anger is getting the best of you.
“Why are you still here?” You snap the question more out of habit than genuine curiosity, keeping your eyes trained on the man wrapping the meat in front of you, unwilling to look at him for fear of seeing the grin you know is there.
His shadow shifts and there is a faint laugh in his voice as he responds. You feel the warmth of his body just beside yours. Like one wrong move, and you’d brush against his side.
“Got a tip about this place, I didn’t follow you here, princesa.” His tone is low, too smooth, like something that shouldn’t feel dangerous but does anyway.
You don't know what it is about him, why his proximity twists your insides into knots. Maybe it’s how he speaks, knowingly, like he’s been around long enough to make every word feel like an unspoken challenge. Perhaps it’s the way he stands, always just a bit too close, constantly too aware of where you are. Or what he wears, jeans and a white shirt, so casual. It makes you…It makes you angry.
You finally turn to face him, and there it is. The slight arch of his brow, the small smirk that tugs at his lips. His mustache, perfect in its precision, only adds to the irritation that surges up your spine. How can someone look so deliberately smug and idiotic at the same time?
“Don’t you have anything better to do?” you snap, the tips of your ears burning.
Peña’s gaze flicks to you, sharp momentarily, before his usual cool indifference settles back in. He shifts his weight against the counter, one elbow resting lazily on the edge, the picture of someone who doesn’t have a care in the world. “Probably,” he says, his mouth curling into a faint smirk. “But this is more fun.”
You both stand there, an invisible line drawn in the air between you, a standoff. Peña won’t leave, and part of you knows that now.
The vendor clears his throat, and you pay him, thanking him quickly. You can feel Peña’s eyes on you as you pivot and begin to walk away.
You trudge through the hectic Mercado, your grocery bag digging into your arm as you weave between people. The crowd swirls around you, but you feel him, steady and unwavering, hot on your heels. The crowd parts for Peña, fluid and instinctual, like the Red Sea before Moses. It’s not the kind of attention anyone asks for, but it’s the kind he commands without effort.
Finally, you spill out of the Mercado and onto the street, the bustling noise fading into the background. Your arm aches under the bag's weight, but you keep walking, your sneakers tapping against the cracked pavement. You can still hear the soft patter of his boots behind you, the sound just a touch too close.
“Peña, I don’t need a bodyguard,” you mutter, furrowing your brows. You stop, but he doesn’t. He keeps walking, though something in his posture changes. Different from any other time, a hushed gravity suspends in the air. He glances over his shoulder, eyes scanning the space behind him. One hand rests on his hip, and you catch the flash of metal beneath his shirt—the weight of a holstered gun.
You glance down the street. It’s eerily silent, with no stray cars and no pedestrians. The street feels barren like it’s holding its breath. The midday sun beats down on the asphalt, but a strange chill pricks the back of your neck. The air feels thin, too still, like something is off—like the world has paused, waiting.
You don’t know how he noticed, but he did. It’s almost imperceptible, yet instinctively, you realize that this is what he does best— always been one step ahead. You’ve never seen him in action before, not like this. There’s a certain precision in how his gaze scans the surroundings, so calculating, his movements so fluid they seem choreographed. It’s almost… beautiful in its deadly grace. It's terrifying.
His eyes flick to you, locking onto yours with a look that needs no words. You don’t question it. You simply follow him, your voice lost, swallowed by the heavy air between you. The grocery bag you were so annoyed about carrying moments ago feels like a distant memory, the weight forgotten as your heart hammers in your chest.
He moves with purpose, his strides long and steady, leading you away from the busy street into an alley that smells faintly of wet concrete and diesel. It’s quieter here, the sounds of the city muffled by the walls that close in around you. The heat of the midday sun lingers in the narrow space, but there's a chill in the air as you see the shadow of a few men lurking just out of sight.
He stops abruptly in front of a metal gate and taps in a pin with the precision of someone who’s done it a thousand times before. The gate creaks open, and he gestures for you to slip inside. You do so without a second thought, too caught up in the moment's urgency to ask questions.
The door shuts behind you with a low thud, the echo sharp in the quiet. Javier’s gun is out before you realize it, his movements swift. You’re in a long hallway, and he leads you to another door, which he unlocks with a key.
He locks the deadbolt behind him, his eyes never leaving the peephole. Only then do you notice where you are.
You linger in the living room, the remnants of adrenaline humming beneath your skin as your eyes sweep over the space. This isn’t what you imagined. You thought he’d live in a place that screamed Javier Peña—something flashy, brash, maybe a little careless, with leather couches, a stocked bar, and ashtrays scattered like afterthoughts. A bachelor pad built for indulgence, not permanence. But this?
This is a home—the kind of place that feels oddly welcoming as if the walls themselves had been warmed by the life lived inside them. Sunlight spills in through half-drawn curtains, casting soft patterns on worn furniture. The couch—slightly lumpy with cushions that have clearly seen better days—faces a modest coffee table scarred with the faintest traces of water rings and cigarette burns. A stack of records leans precariously against a battered turntable in the corner, their spines worn smooth with use.
The air smells faintly of tobacco, wood polish, and something you can’t quite place—maybe the ghost of cologne clinging to his leather jacket. The infamous jacket you’d seen him shrug into as he and Murphy made their way out of the office.
Not that you’d habitually thought about his house or the things he’d keep in it. Or him. Definitely not him.
“Someone’s been following you. Who knows for how long,” he mutters, his tone sharp, clipped, and brimming with restrained anger.
He moves to the window, parting the blinds with two fingers just enough to peer outside. The barrel of his weapon stays low, the gleam of the steel catching a sliver of sunlight.
His eyes sweep the street, and the hardened look on his face is nothing like you’ve ever seen before.
“Me? I’m nobody. Why the hell would anyone follow me?” you ask, your voice cracking under the pressure of trying to sound unaffected.
He doesn’t look at you, his eyes scanning the street beyond the glass, every muscle in his body so taut you can see the ripple beneath his shirt.
“Doesn’t matter who you are,” he mutters, his voice low and cutting through the street noise like a blade. “They find out you’re with the DEA, and you’ve got a target on your back.”
Your pulse quickens and the sound of blood rushing in your ears drowns out the quiet of the room. The space suddenly feels smaller, every shadow sharper, and the calm you’d clung to is now a distant memory.
Your mind races, but all the thoughts are tangled up in a knot—half of you wants to dismiss it, to say he’s just trying to scare you, to brush it off as just another part of the job. But the other half knows this is real.
“So what, I’m just gonna have men wanting to kidnap me?” you say, upset, your grocery bag thumping on his couch as you sigh. This was a big deal, a huge deal, but right now, in your career, it felt more like an inconvenience.
“You don’t get it,” he mutters, shaking his head slightly, the weight of his words carrying a tone of finality. His voice is low and firm, like a man who’s seen too much and no longer has time for explanations.
“They wouldn’t just kidnap you…” He trails off, but you don’t need him to finish the sentence. The image plays out in your mind—a quiet warning etched with the brutality only someone like Peña could understand.
You swallow, and for the first time, reality's sharp, biting edge sinks in. The world outside this room or your office walls wasn’t just something you could read about in reports or watch on the news. It’s here. It’s now.
Peña moves from the window, holstering his gun but keeping his hand close to his hip. You stare at him, his dark eyes unreadable. His silence makes the room feel smaller like he’s drawing you in despite the distance between you.
You cross your arms, trying to force some semblance of control, though your breath is coming faster now. “I’ve dealt with danger before, Peña. This... This isn’t a fucking movie.”
He looks at you for a beat too long, like he’s trying to read you, see through the layers of bravado you’re wearing. “This isn’t the same thing,” he says quietly, almost as if he’s speaking more to himself than to you. “You’re not in control here.”
The words hit harder than you expect, striking a nerve you didn’t know you had. A flicker of something—fear, maybe—passes over you, but you force it down. You don’t need him to see that.
“And you think you can protect me?” you ask, the question escaping before you can stop it. There’s a sharpness in your tone, a mixture of challenge and... curiosity.
“Protect you?” he repeats, his tone dry but not unkind. “Cariño, I don’t think they’re handing out medals for saving you from yourself.” He smirks faintly, his eyes flicking to how you stand out in the room like it’s absurd. “But if you’re hell-bent on getting snatched, by all means, call a taxi. I could use the night off.”
Finally, you let out a shaky breath, reaching for the bag of groceries that still rests on the couch. “I’m not some damsel in distress, Peña,” you mutter, though your voice lacks the conviction it had a few minutes ago.
“Good,” he replies, brows furrowing as you attempt to walk past him. “Then don’t make me waste my time playing knight in shining armor. You’re safe here—now let me figure out what we’re gonna do.” He reaches for you, grabbing your upper arm with a strength you know is half the power.
You pause mid-stride, the weight of his grip burning through the sleeve of your thin shirt. So thin you can basically feel his fingerprints burning into your flesh. It’s not painful, not even close—but how he holds you feels like a tether to something you’re not sure you want to name. You glance down at his large hand before trickling up towards his gaze, the dark pools of his eyes crackling with frustration.
“I don’t need you to rescue me,” you snap, trying to inject more steel into your words than you actually feel. “I’m not—”
“Yeah, I know,” he interrupts, his voice low and sharp enough to cut. “You’re not a damsel. You think you can handle this yourself,” he recites like it’s a joke like you’re a joke.
The heat in your chest flares, half from his words and half from how he’s still holding on, as though letting go isn’t an option. Like you’re a kid, naive. “Let go of me, Peña,” you say, warning in your eyes, quieter this time. But this feels different than other times, more at stake, your close proximity, the walls around you. You feel inebriated as if your thoughts won’t flow in a cohesive line no matter how hard you try.
He was drawing you in, the shift in his gaze disarming. Those brown eyes—soft, searching, almost wounded—held a weight that made breathing hard. They begged for something you weren’t sure you could give. Or maybe he just wanted you to believe they did.
And damn it, it was working.
You could feel yourself slipping, the sharp edges of your anger dulling against the pull of his presence. Every rational thought screamed at you to hold your ground, to remember who he was and what he’d done. This was his play, wasn’t it? The practiced vulnerability, the carefully crafted sincerity meant to turn you into putty in his hands.
And yet, the worst part was how you wanted to let it happen. To let those stupid, heartbreakingly tender eyes convince you that he wasn’t all bad. That you weren’t just another stop along the way to wherever he’d inevitably disappear to next.
It made you want to scream. Or maybe slap him. Or yourself—whoever deserved it more in this moment.
His hand eases its grip on your arm, but his fingers linger, curved just enough to stay connected. Not holding, not quite, just there—as if to remind himself you’re real. “Quédate aquí,” he says, his voice low, a shade too soft. Almost pleading. Almost breaking. That sound—it crawls under your skin and wraps itself around your ribs. You hate how it settles, molten and insistent, dragging heat low in your belly.
“Por favor.” His tone shifts, like a secret he can’t entirely swallow. “Do me this favor, just once.”
“Fine. Just once…” Your eyes betray you, flickering to his mouth. It’s unfair how there’s no smirk to hide behind this time. No shield from that damn cupid’s bow, sharp and pouty. Your gaze trails upward—his nose, the slope of it, the way it catches the light—until you meet his eyes. He’s watching you, his focus as unyielding as a snare, as though cataloging every place you’ve been looking, every thought you’re trying not to have.
“Give me that,” His fingers find the strap of your bag, curling around it effortlessly as if it belongs to him. He slowly lifts it off your shoulder, and you don’t stop him. You don’t move. You just let him, even when it should annoy you, even when his hand brushing yours feels like a sizzling brand.
“You’re a pain in my ass,” He doesn’t say a word as he sets your bag down on the couch. His movements are all too intentional, too measured. You barely register the sound of the fabric hitting the cushion before he turns back to you.
Your breath catches somewhere in your throat. He's too close again, close enough that the room feels like it's folding in on itself, bending around the space between you as if it’s trying to force you together.
“So I’ve been told,” He replies, not even a hint of surprise in his eyes.
You stand there, frozen, almost daring the air to crack, even though every instinct in your body is screaming for you to step back and put more distance between you. But that’s the thing, isn’t it? Distance doesn't change how it feels. The weight of him, the pull of him—it's suffocating, magnetic. You're trembling, though you can’t decide if it's from the desire to step closer or the fear of what giving in might mean.
Your neck burns with heat, crawling up, spreading like wildfire, and you hate that it's happening. Hate that he’s the reason your pulse is racing, your skin buzzing with sensitivity. You can’t give in. You’ve seen it. The way women fall over themselves for him, like moths to a flame. No, he wasn’t going to make you another notch in his belt.
You wonder if he can hear your heart pounding louder than any words you might say. You want to speak, to break the silence before it consumes you, but all that comes out is a shaky breath—louder than the thoughts tearing at your insides.
No words make it past the lump in your throat. You want to tell him to step away, to fuck off, to stop looking at you like that. But you know that would mean walking away from this. From him. And the thought alone makes you want to crumble into yourself.
You were an idiot once again, shaking, wanting him—wanting everything you’d sworn you wouldn’t. You swore you were stronger than this and that you didn’t want to be the woman waiting for him to finally choose you.
But the heat pulses like it’s alive, and you can’t stop the furrow in your brows, physically pained by the scorch. You don’t even know if he realizes how badly you’re fighting to hold yourself together. His eyes are black, unreadable. But they’re too soft. Too focused on you.
The pressure in the room inflates until every breath you take feels labored.
So close, the warmth of Peña’s body radiates off him, yet it’s his gaze that pins you in place. His eyes drop to your face, and the space between you seems to shrink even more until you can feel his breath grazing your skin, every inhale a whisper against you.
Then, without a word, without any sign of warning, his hand reaches up. You hold your breath, bracing for something, anything, but the touch is different—gentle, almost tentative. His fingers brush the stray strands of hair away from your face, sweeping them behind your ear. It’s a delicate movement, but its weight hangs in the air like he’s touching something fragile, something delicate. His hand stays there for a moment, just lingering at the side of your face, the softness of his touch almost mocking the storm of heat inside you. You want to flinch, to pull away, but you stop short. Not when he’s so close, not when the very air is thick with this... this electricity that’s become impossible to ignore.
He doesn’t let go, though. His fingers curve around the back of your neck, pulling you slightly closer, his thumb brushing over your jaw in a way that’s almost too intimate, too tender. His gaze flicks between your eyes, searching for something, and you can’t look away. You can’t look anywhere else.
“Stop me,” His lips barely skim yours at first—just a whisper of contact that sends shockwaves through your body. It’s almost too much to bear, but you don’t pull away.
A soft, breathy moan slips out of you before your lips even touch fully, a sound that feels so raw, so unguarded. His hand tightens on your jaw, pulling you into him, and in the next instant, his mouth is on yours, desperate, fervent, as if he can’t stand the space between you for even a second longer.
It’s not a gentle kiss. It’s a kiss born from restraint, from months of wanting something he didn’t think he could have. His lips part yours with an almost brutal force, the intensity of it taking you by surprise. His tongue slides against yours, hot, wet, seeking—hungry. There’s no finesse to it, no lingering moment of sweetness. It’s primal like he’s finally allowing himself to take what’s been torturing him for too long.
The kiss escalates, and for a heartbeat, everything else falls away. It’s just him and you and this electricity, the raw need surging between you. He pulls you closer, his body pressing against yours as if he can’t get close enough, as if the torture has taken over every rational thought he had.
Your breath is stolen, and so are your thoughts. So consumed by the fire in your veins, the taste of his tongue, the firmness of his shoulders beneath your hands. He pulls away so quick it feels like he’s taken the breath from you.
"If you don’t stop me," he murmurs, his voice cracking under the weight of his own need. His thumb strokes the edge of your jaw, the touch so light it sends a shiver down your spine. "Cariño, please—" He swallows hard, his lips hovering just close enough to tempt you. "—tell me to stop. Or I won’t."
The words are pained as if saying them costs him everything. His breath is warm against your mouth, his forehead nearly pressing to yours, and the vulnerability in his voice cuts through the haze, grounding you even as your body betrays you with how badly you want to close the distance again.
“Then don’t,” you reply, swallowing the regret you know is rising in your thoughts. What would be the use of regretting now when the line has already been crossed?
A low, guttural growl rumbles from Javier’s throat as he kisses you again, the kind of kiss that swallows your breath and sets fire to every fiber of your being. His chest heaves against yours, his frustration bleeding into every press of his lips, every flick of his tongue. It’s as if he’s punishing you for every bratty retort, every dismissive glance, and for the endless nights you’d unwittingly occupied his mind.
“You’ve been driving me fucking crazy,” he murmurs against your lips, his voice low and rough, each word dripping with heat and accusation. His teeth graze your bottom lip before he bites down, not hard enough to hurt, but enough to make you gasp. “You know that, don’t you? Torturing me every damn day.”
His hands drop from your neck, sliding down to your hips with a bruising grip, his fingers digging into your flesh as though trying to leave his mark. The pain mingles with pleasure, leaving you wanting more.
You rise on your toes, desperate to meet him, to feel him. The contrast between his towering frame and your smaller form only intensifies the ache pooling low in your belly. He doesn’t make you wait—he never would—his strong hands gripping your thighs as he hoists you up with effortless ease.
Your legs wrap around his waist, and your arms circle his neck, fingers threading through the hair at the nape.
He doesn’t bother with asking permission. His movements are rough, almost frantic, as he blindly carries you through the dimly lit apartment. When he reaches his room, he kicks the door shut with a force that rattles the frame. The darkness swallows you both, but you don’t care. Your only focus is the hard lines of his body pressed against yours, the feeling of his arousal straining against you, and the way he growls when you grind down on him.
“You don’t even know what you’re doing to me,” he mutters, his voice hoarse, as if you’ve unraveled him in ways he’s not used to. His words are a contradiction—gruff and demanding but with an edge of vulnerability that makes your heart stutter.
Your back hits the mattress, and he leans over you, his body caging you in. His hands roam your sides, calloused and sure, and you arch into him, a moan spilling from your lips as you chase his touch. He pulls back just enough to look at you, his dark eyes burning with something that feels almost possessive.
“How ‘bout you show me then?” you fire, the familiar counter making you feel like you’ve found some semblance of control.
Javier's eyes darken, his lips parting slightly as if your challenge caught him off guard. But the corner of his mouth twitches, betraying the ghost of a cocky smile. “As long as you’re sure,” he replies, a dangerous mix of plea and provocation. It’s like he’s daring you to falter, daring you to back out—while silently begging you not to.
You scoff, leaning up, your lips brushing against his but never quite touching. The tease of it burns more than any kiss could. “Don’t get soft with me,” you whisper, your voice low. “I don’t like soft. I like to get fucked. Think you can give me that, Javier?”
His name, spoken like that—soft, intimate, a prayer all at once—makes something deep in him snap. He isn’t used to this, to you. To someone who doesn’t shy away, who doesn’t melt the moment he touches them, who doesn’t give him that instant satisfaction of control.
You’re not yielding, not letting him fall into his usual rhythm. No, you’re setting the pace, and he’s following—fumbling, even—like some love-drunk fool.
Javier leans down into your neck, the scent of your skin filling his lungs, intoxicating him. “Careful, cariño,” he warns, though the words lack their usual sharpness. They make him shake, his cock strain in his jeans. “You might just get exactly what you’re asking for.”
You push at his shoulders, your hands urging him back. He doesn't hesitate, scooting off the bed with swift, practiced movements. Like he’d done this a million times, and the thought of that angered you. It made something flare in your eyes as you watched him, his fingers working the buttons and zippers.
When he’s finally bare, the hard, defined lines of his body seem almost too much to take in all at once. His chest rises and falls with shallow breaths, his cock already thick and leaking. He looks at you, eyes shadowed and hungry, as he kneels on the bed.
His fingers curl around the waistband of your shorts, dragging them off your hips along with your panties, the fabric scraping over your skin as he exposes you to him. Before you can process the shift, his fingers catch the hem of your tank top, yanking it down with such force that the seam strains.
The path of his gaze burns into your skin, trailing across the valley of your breasts and down to where you close your thighs. He places his hands on your knees and spreads you wide open.
“Hiding such a pretty pussy from me, look at you.” Javier’s cock twitches at the sight of you on your back, head against his pillows. You were in his bed, and the glisten of your pussy as she dripped onto his sheets was because of him. And that made his chest rise and his cock weep.
You weren’t hiding anything—but the way he said it made something inside you flare, a fierce urge to prove him wrong surging through you. “Javier,” you say, dragging your hand down your stomach and to your lips, spreading yourself open for him with your fingers. You could feel the mess, the slickness that coated your fingers just from finally giving in. It felt so freeing.
You sit up, breathless, just as Javier leans down. You raise your fingers to his mouth, and he doesn’t hesitate—his lips parting just enough for your fingers to slip past them.
His tongue flicks out, velvet-soft, running along the length of your fingers in a slow, hot caress. He sucks them in, drawing them deeper, his eyes never leaving yours, a silent challenge in his gaze. Each pull of his mouth sends a jolt of heat spiraling through you.
“Fucking heaven,” he breathes out like he’s just had a taste of something long denied.
“Ass up,” he demands, his words a dark growl that sends shivers down your spine. “Let me see you like that, baby.”
You give it to him—your body obeying before your mind can catch up. You twist, moving slowly and carefully, your muscles aching as you position yourself. His hand slides to the back of your neck, pushing your head into the sheets, muffling your breath.
“Do you have a condom?” you ask, your voice strained and muffled against the sheets.
Javier doesn’t answer.
Instead, you feel him shift behind you, a growl rumbling in his chest before you feel the unmistakable warmth of his mouth on your pussy. His tongue flicks against you, tasting you like he’s been starving for this moment. You gasp, a sharp, involuntary sound slipping past your lips as he delves deeper, his tongue greedy and frantic as it drags along your slit, teasing and claiming in one motion.
His hands grip your thighs, pulling them wider, giving him better access as he feasts on you, wholly absorbed in the act. Your knees sink into the mattress, your hands clutching the sheets as you feel his tongue slipping up to your other hole, circling it with the tip of his tongue. You cry out, the feeling so foreign yet so delicious.
You feel him lick into your folds, his tongue swirling your clit, circling, and dipping lower as if to explore every inch of you. His breath is hot, his lips pressing against you as he eats you from behind like a man possessed, relentless, driven by need. He doesn’t care about anything but the taste of you, the feeling of you writhing beneath his touch.
Your hips buck involuntarily, pressing back into him, wanting more, needing more. It feels like he’s owning you, taking what he wants without hesitation, and the power of it makes your head spin.
He’s pulling an orgasm from you like he’s been trained to—like he knows every inch of your body, every reaction, every breath you take. Like he’s studied you and your body, found its rhythm, its tempo, and now he's using it against you, claiming you in ways you didn’t think you could be claimed.
“Javier, please,” You gasp, your breath coming in short, jagged bursts as you surrender to the rush of blood, the intense pull of your orgasm crashing over you, leaving you trembling. He doesn’t stop, not even when you shake, when your body gives in ultimately, and you attempt to pull away.
Only when he deems it right does he pull away, wiping where you coat his chin, and he reaches into his bedside table without a word. Spent; you hear him rip open a condom in silence as he rolls it on his cock. You feel his hands on your hips not a moment later, the tip of his cock swipes along your pussy before inching in.
Javier can feel the aftershocks of your first orgasm, the way you clenched around the tip of his cock before he can get another inch in. And it made him gasp, how tightly you clamped on to him; it felt like you were suffocating him. His self-restraint was hanging on by a thread, but you pushed back against him, sinking him further into your soaked pussy until he was buried balls deep. You were hot and soft inside, and Javier tensed as he watched you fuck yourself onto his cock.
“Damn, cariño, wish you could see this.” You hear him say over your shoulder, and you twist your neck to watch him. Large hands on the globes of your ass, watching himself disappear into you as you feel him hit something deep inside you each time.
You feel the subtle flex of his muscles as he shifts, pressing deeper into you. The rhythm intensifies, and the familiar stir of heat coils tight in your stomach. He moves steadily, his hand sliding down to your tit, squeezing and pulling at your nipple.
Then, with a deliberate pull, his hand wraps around your throat, the pressure possessive. He guides you upward, forcing you to rise on your knees, and the shift brings a new angle, deeper, harder. He grips your jaw to keep you there, his breath fanning against your hair as if he's inhaling the very essence of you, a soft exhale against your neck.
Each thrust is deeper than the last, a steady rhythm that threatens to shatter the fragile control you still cling to. He’s unrelenting, his grip firm as he pulls you closer, his teeth grazing the tender curve of your neck. He bites into your flesh so hard it stings, so hard you’ll be branded for life.
You gasp, the burn of his teeth searing into your skin, and he presses harder, pinning you against him. “Say my name,” he growls as he licks against the bite, “who makes you feel this way?”
You can barely catch your breath before his hand is at your head, forcing you down into the sheets again. The pressure of his palm is suffocating, but something is intoxicating about it, the way he has you utterly in his grasp. You can’t hold back the soft, desperate mewl that slips from your lips as you push back against him, needing more, wanting to feel the tension build once again.
“Javier… you…fuck me so good. So perfect,” you whisper, the words slipping out almost without control, as if your body is speaking for you. Javier watches as you snake your hand between your thighs, a whimper leaving your throat as you rub at your swollen and slick clit.
“Makin’ me lose my mind, cariño,” Javier growls, his voice rough with the effort to keep his composure. The pulse of your pussy around him drives him crazy, and he presses forward, each movement bringing him closer to the edge. “Give me another, please. I know you can.”
The way he says it, how he begs for it, like a man on his knees for you.
You hold onto the memory—this moment when Javier Peña begs for you, so desperate, so…pathetic.
“That’s it,” Javier's grip tightens on you as he moves deeper, a low groan escaping his chest. You feel every inch of his thick cock, the way his rhythm matches the frantic pace of your fingers, your body bracing for the inevitable release.
“Got you cariño, make me feel so good…your perfect pussy,” A litany of words spill from his mouth, his string of thoughts caught in the air. A sob catches in your throat, the pressure mounting before it finally breaks, coursing through you like a storm. Your nails dig into your palms as your body trembles for the second time, the world around you blurring with tears. The sensation of him inside you, his rhythm pushing you to the edge and beyond.
Javier’s breath is harsh and heavy as he spills into the condom. You feel the pulse of him deep inside you, and the sensation lingers long after he’s finished.
"Shit," he mutters, his voice strained as he swallows thickly. There is a moment of silence, of pure peace, before you startle when you feel the soft brush of his lips on your shoulder—gentle, almost too tender. It’s a sharp contrast to the bite he left there, his teeth still tenderly marking your skin. His kiss lingers for a heartbeat, a soft, almost intimate gesture before he pulls away completely. After a moment, he withdraws his softening cock, and the pressure inside you eases.
He pulls himself away from the bed, and the sudden movement makes your head spin. You push yourself up, too, feeling the rush of blood hit your temples, the pressure building in your skull. Your eyes follow him as he tosses the used condom into the trash, his hands trembling. With a sigh, he reaches for the pack of cigarettes on the bedside table, lights one with a shaky flick of his thumb, and exhales slowly. The smoke curls in the dim light, hanging in the air like a silent afterthought.
“I can give you a ride home, but I don’t think your groceries are going to make it,” he says, his voice light with that same casual humor. He takes a drag from his cigarette, then holds it out toward you, offering it like it’s some sort of peace offering.
You don’t move toward it, and the sight of him—already dressed, already dismissing the moment with that effortless charm—sends a jolt of bitterness through you. This is how he does it, isn’t it? Fucks them, smokes, gets dressed, then sends them on their way. You dress quickly, and finish pulling on your shoes, the awkwardness of the moment hitting you all at once. Without a word, you turn and head for the door.
“Hey!” His voice stops you in your tracks. “You can’t just leave. Who knows if it’s safe? Don’t be reckless. Cariño, ven acá.”
You roll your eyes, the sarcasm practically dripping from your words. “Call it post-nut clarity, Javier.” You reply with the same sarcasm in your tone.
You yank the door open, ready to leave, but then stop dead in your tracks. Murphy stands in the doorway, his hand suspended in the air as if he’d been about to knock. His blue eyes widen in surprise when they meet yours. His lips part slightly, and he lifts an eyebrow as his gaze flicks past you, settling on Javier—shirtless, jeans unbuttoned, cigarette dangling between his fingers.
Heat floods your already flushed cheeks, making your skin feel tight, and in that instant, everything becomes too vivid. Too exposed. You stand there, caught in a moment of sheer embarrassment. The awkwardness is suffocating, yet strangely, you don’t know whether you want to run or stay and unravel the feeling that has suddenly settled in your chest.
You do the only thing that feels right in the moment—you run. You brush past Murphy, the heat of his presence lingering just behind you as he follows. It’s perfect, really. He’ll drive you home, and you’ll avoid the awkward confrontation with Javier. You won’t have to face him telling you, in the most painfully polite way, that he isn’t interested, that he never was. You don’t need that kind of false pity. Not from him. Not when he got the whole thing twisted.
You wanted this—just this. A fuck, nothing more. And you didn’t want him to think you wanted more.
But then, you make the mistake of glancing back. And when you do, you catch it—Javier’s gaze, sad brown eyes darkened with something you can’t quite place. His brows furrow slightly, and for the briefest moment, his expression cracks open in a way you didn’t expect. Hurt?
No. You’re reading it wrong. It’s not hurt. It’s...relief.
Javier Peña only ever cared about one person—himself. You’d known that from the moment you first crossed paths.
The truth hit hard, but it was the only thing that made sense: leaving first was a favor. And for once, you didn’t feel bad about walking away.
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I have a sorta specific request for either Emily or JJ from criminal minds. You're sorta new to the BAU and you end up getting sick while on a case, you don't hide being sick and do take care of yourself the best you can while still working you just don't want anyone to worry about you but E/JJ end up noticing and end up taking care of you? Kinda specific but I don't really like the whole "won't take medicine nor take care of themselves" trope. Thanks in advance! Or no worries if you don't want to write this!
Emily watched from a distance as you downed another round of DayQuil and shoved the bottle back into your bag. As hard as you had tried to fight it, the virus you had picked up at the start of the trip to Louisiana was taking it's toll. All of the vitamin C and other preventative measures had seemingly been for nothing, but she had to admit it was impressive how you were still managing to power through.
"How're you holding up?" she asked, entering your make-shift "office" in the corner of the small-town police station the team was temporarily operating out of.
"I am going to sleep for at least three days when we get home. Maybe four, but that might be considered a coma," you responded, voice raw from coughing. "How about you?"
"I'll probably just need a day and a half, two tops. You wanna head back to the hotel for the night? Garcia isn't going to have news until the morning, and we're kind of just spinning our wheels til then."
You nodded gratefully and stood, grabbing the bag stuffed with case files and cold medicine at your feet. Though you hadn't realized it, the two of you were the last ones left at the station. Emily knew part of the reason you were pushing yourself so hard was to impress the rest of the team, as this was your first official case with them since joining the BAU a few weeks prior. What Emily didn't know, was that you were also trying to impress her specifically, even if you weren't willing to admit that to yourself just yet.
"I'm not going to lie, I have taken enough cold medicine in the last 12 hours that I could be legally impaired at this point. Would you mind driving?" you asked as the two of you headed towards the single remaining black SUV in the parking lot. She chuckled and nodded, having already started searching her pockets for the keys.
"No worries, I was already planning on it. Also, totally won't judge you if you take a power nap on the way back. You have definitely earned one."
Grateful for the darkness, you blushed and felt your cheeks burn against the cool night air as you reached the passenger side door and got in. As she started the engine, the air that blasted from the vents blew a waft of her perfume towards you and you felt your stomach leap for a second. If you weren't so fatigued, you might have scolded yourself for how quickly you were developing a crush on your coworker. However, you were already drifting off after less than a minute of settling into your head and had no time to do so.
Emily, on the other hand, did not have the luxury of a nap to avoid the conflicting thoughts in her head. Had you not drifted off so quickly, you might have caught the glance she sent your way at the first red light she encountered, and how this time it was her that blushed.
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Ghost Among Men
Part two
Pairings: Buckyxcontractkiller!reader
Warnings: Cursing, mentions of cannabilism/human trafficking (Small sentences, no detail), thats about it??
Word Count: 2.6k
Not proofread, mistakes are mine.
********
It had been a few weeks since you and Bucky had last spoken, much less seen each other. He still scowled at the incident that he shared with you and Steve in the alley way. Bcuky had now found himself in the communal lounge room, sitting on the couch and listening to music from the 40s, his head tilted back, his eyes closed, muscles relaxed as he let himself sink into the cushions.
It had been a long day, he had gotten back from a tiring mission this morning, immediately followed by a debriefing, and then followed by three hours worth of training, and then followed by one of his therapy sessions. This was the first time he’d gotten to relax, to settle down and listen-
A loud squeal tore through the air, followed by laughter. Bucky opened his eyes to see you and Steve walking in, ice cream in hand. Steve’s hand had shot out to snatch some of your cherry jubilee, despite the full cup of chocolate ice cream he had. Bucky eyed them, not saying a word.
“Steve, stop it, you have your own!” You laughed, turning away to eat your ice cream in peace.
“But yours is so good! C’mon Y/n, one more bite, please?” Steve begged playfully, causing you to laugh again as he advanced on you.
“No! You already ate half of mine, eat your own!” You squealed again as Steve’s hand shot out to snag another spoonful, and this time you were too late to dodge it.
Bucky grumbled in annoyance as he watched you two. ‘Not dating my ass.’ He thought to himself. The way you two shamelessly flirted with each other, and right in front of everyone else, well him, there was no way there wasn’t some inkling of interest. Bucky rolled his eyes and turned up the volume in his headphones.
He closed his eyes, leaning his head back onto the couch once more, only for his eyes to shoot back open when Steve plopped down next to him, holding out the chocolate ice cream. “Gotcha some, Buck.” Steve smiled innocently. Bucky rolled his eyes, grumbling as he turned down his music and took the ice cream, mumbling a quick “Thanks.”
Steve turned his attention back to you as you sat on the opposite couch on the other side of the coffee table, your ice cream finished and deposited. “Tony tell you who your partner is going to be for this next mission?” Steve questioned, leaning back and spreading his arms across the back on the couch, one arm outstretched on one side and the other outstretched behind Bucky as he ate his ice cream, one earbud hanging down.
You took a deep breath, “Nope, he hasn’t told me a word, just said I’d have a new mission partner so I wouldn’t be on solos anymore. Fury’s orders apparently.” You answered, shrugging as you glanced over at Bucky.
The former Winter Soldier was silent, eating the chocolate ice cream silently, obviously listening in, but trying to be subtle about it. ‘Maybe he’s not so much of an ass?’ You found yourself thinking, ‘Maybe he’s just the quiet type.’
“Odd for them not to tell you.” Steve mused. “When do you ship out?”
“Supposedly later tonight, but that depends on if everything goes to plan beforehand.” You answered, flopping back on the couch and crossing your legs. Bucky’s eyes didn’t miss the curve of your body as you did so.
“They tell you how deadly it’s supposed to be?” Steve asked.
“Mock four, apparently.” You answered. “I mean, they gave me all of the details except for who my partner is. I just don’t get it. I mean does my partner know anything about this? Do they leave at the same time I do? How do I know they’re not a threat?”
“Those are some good points.” Steve mused, propping his legs up on the coffee table.
Bucky finished the ice cream, and leaned back on the couch, his muscles still tense, and his earbud still dangling down as he listened in on the conversation.
“I don’t know. I mean what if this person was a former HYDRA agent you know? I mean I don’t want to deal with that.” You said, propping your arms underneath your head.
Bucky’s eyes followed down your throat to your toes, then shot back up to your face. “I thought they had all of the HYDRA agents arrested after SHIELD fell?”
“They supposedly did.” You answered.
“No one really knows for sure, Buck.” Steve quipped.
“Anyway, suppose since I’m leaving tonight, I should start packing. See ya guys.” You said, getting off the couch and walking down one of the halls.
Bucky had been called into Tony’s office an hour later, the billionaire informing him of his next mission.
“You leave tonight with your partner, simple infiltration. You are to cover your partner’s six, don’t get her killed.” Tony said, shoving a file towards Bucky.
“There’s no way in hell I am going on a mission with her.” Bucky said, pushing the file back at Tony.
“Listen Marichuan Candidate, regardless whether you like her or not, we need you to cover her six. This is a mock four mission, and I’d rather not send her in alone.” Tony explained, shoving the file back at Bucky.
“What about Steve? Those two are peas and carrots.” Bucky said, again shoving the file back.
“Not qualified.” Tony quipped, shoving it back and keeping his hand on it.
“Natasha?” Bucky said, eying the file with disgust.
“Covering her own operations.” Tony said, sighing and rubbing his temple. “Will you just take it? Look Buckaroo, just make sure she gets in and out alive, and then you can go back to hating the angel of death, alright?”
“Since when do we work with contract killers?” Bucky asked sarcastically.
“Since she spared your ass and got beat for going against orders.” Tony snapped. “Now take the damn file, Barnes.”
Bucky froze, staring at the man before him in a quiet shock. Steve had said you were trained to kill him, but now Tony is saying that you spared him? Just exactly how much did you know about the Winter Soldier?
“Spared me?” Bucky asked quietly.
Tony removed his hand from the file, going back to typing on his computer. “Yes, she spared you. Take the file and get out, icebreaker.”
Bucky licked his lips and leaned forward, grabbing the file without another word. He quickly scanned over the pages, seeing the four targets, the information needed, and the location of the threats.
After looking over the file and memorizing what he needed, he got up and left Tony’s office and made his way to his private quarters, packing a bag for the mission.
You and Steve were saying your goodbye outside of the quinjet, and that’s when you saw your partner, you immediately turned your back. “There’s no way.” Your eyes flickered over to Steve. “Tell me you knew about this?”
“I didn’t.” Steve said, his hushed voice matching yours. .
“He hates me Steve, he’ll probably kill me before the jet even lands.” You protested through gritted teeth.
“Just relax, alright? He’s a grump, he’s old.” Steve began.
“You’re old and you’re not a grump.” You interjected.
Steve shot you a look that told you to be polite and keep quiet. “Bucky has been through a different experience than I have, you know that.” Steve cupped your cheek with his hand, caressing the soft skin there for a moment. “Just be that happy girl you always are,” He said gently, giving you a soft smile and dropping his hand. “He’ll come around eventually. Tony did.”
“Tony’s different and you know it.” I whispered back, making Steve chuckle.
“Get on the jet, smartass.” He quipped, playfully shoving you towards the jet, in which you laughed.
“Asshole!” You said getting onto the jet.
“Language!” Steve chuckled, just as Bucky was approaching him.
“Punk,” Bucky said, the tiniest of smiles on his face. “You set this up didn’t you?”
Steve laughed. “You and her are exactly the same.”
“Don’t evade my question Steve.” Bucky said, the small smile dropping immediately.
“Okay, so maybe I was looking at what skill sets would be good for the mission when Tony asked.” Steve admitted, smiling.
“Oh, you really are a punk,” Bucky grumbled underneath his breath.
“And you’re a jerk,” Steve shot back, still smiling. “Now get on the jet before I throw you in there.”
“Yeah, I’d like to see you try Rodgers.” Bucky grumbled, walking into the jet.
You were already in the cockpit, powering up the jet, the engines roaring to life. Bucky watched as you waved goodbye to Steve from the cockpit.
“You sitting down, soldier?” You called from the cockpit, putting on the headset.
“Yeah, yeah.” Bucky grumbled, taking a set in the cockpit next to you. He watched as you flipped a few controls on the console, the jet lifting off the ground and taking off.
“So what’s your plan?” Bucky found himself asking after about 10 minutes of silence.
“Well, what were you debriefed on?” You asked, looking at the coordinates on the screen.
“Four targets, I’m covering your six.” Bucky replied.
“Then you have your plan.” You answered, flipping on the autopilot and getting up from the cockpit chair.
“So you don’t have a plan?” Bucky asked, concern and alarm flashing in his eyes as he stood up and followed you through the flight deck.
You were already going through the files of your targets in the back of the jet. “Uh, yeah sure if that’s what you want to call it.” You answered, not really paying attention to his question.
“This is why Steve is a better companion for you.” Bucky quipped. “At least Steve has a plan.”
You didn’t give in to his bait, not much anyway. “Listen pookiebear, your job is to cover my six, and make sure I don’t die. My job is to infiltrate, eliminate, extract, and then exfiltrate. Understood?” Your voice was clipped, professional as you looked over the files.
Bucky bristled at the name, physically recoiling as if struck. “You did not just call me pookiebear.”
“No, I'm pretty sure I did.” You answered, grabbing specific papers from the files and setting them to the side.
“I have a name.” Bucky sneered.
“I know.” You answered, eyes scanning over more papers and then turning, and attempting to walk across the deck. Bucky stood in your way, arms crossed over his broad chest, staring down at you with a disapproving look. Your eyes finally met his gaze.
“So use it.” He snapped.
“Sergeant James Buchanon Barnes, 107th infantry regiment.” You said, glancing back down at your documents and side stepping him. “Served in WWII, was captured by Hydra in 1943 and experimented on until you broke give or take twenty years later, and became their precious little Winter Soldier.”
“Alright!” Bucky snapped, snatching your arm and pulling you away from the files. “Listen little miss smartass, I’m not going to put up with your attitude, so either fix it or this is going to be one hell of a mission.”
You tilted your head, quirking a brow and eyeing him. His eyes blazed with fury, a silent warning to say your next words with caution.
“Is that a threat, Mr. Barnes?” You asked, sounding bored.
Bucky groaned and let you go, taking a step back. He was tense, obviously distressed. “You’re insufferable.” He grumbled.
“You’ll get used to it.” You murmured, turning back to the files. “We’ll enter through the front door, it's a public event. Only one of the four targets is to be eliminated.” You said, softening your voice. “Once we get the information we need from the other three, we’ll go after him.” You handed Bucky a file of the main target. “I plan on taking him to one of the backrooms, was hoping maybe you could make sure we’re not followed back there.”
Bucky hummed as he looked over the file, his eyes skimming the profile of the man. “You’re going to take this guy to one of the back rooms? Where exactly are we going?”
You handed him a blueprint of a large mansion. “Mr. Zinc has a gorgeous mansion, don’t you agree, Buck?”
“Don’t call me that.” Bucky said as he took the blueprints and started looking them over.
“It’s either Buck, or pookiebear, take your pick.” You shrugged.
Bucky rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything. “What’s so special about this Zinc guy anyway?”
“Human trafficking, but not in the way you’re thinking.” You answered. “That’s his money maker anyway, he also does drugs and weapons on the side.”
“What way then?” Bucky said.
“Cannibalism.”
“Fucking psycho.”
You snapped your fingers and did a little finger gun at him while you typed away on a computer with your other hand. “Alright, we’re on the guest list.” You said, “They ask who you are, you’re Dean Smith, and I’m your wife, Katy Smith.”
Bucky scoffed. “No way in hell did you say we’re married.”
“Couples only invitations, big guy. Hope you’re good at acting.” You said, going back to the files and handing him another sheet of paper. “Mr. Zinc apparently has this on his person, hence our extraction. My informant has said it’s lodged into his flesh, so it won’t be easily accessed.”
“Your informant?” Bucky asked, looking over the paper, a small description of a tube that's placed via tube into the bloodstream. “How exactly are we supposed to find this thing if it's in his flesh?”
“I have a lot of contacts, Mr. Barnes.” You said, putting the papers back into their respective files. “As for extracting things out of flesh, well that happens to be one of my specialities, so it's not something you’ll have to worry about.”
“I don’t even want to know what that means.” Bucky muttered.
“Probably best if you don’t.” You said, and began to walk back to the cockpit of the jet. Bucky following you.
“I take it this isn’t the first time you’ve run into these guys?” He asked.
“Nope, can guarantee you it won’t be the last either. I’ve been tracking these guys for years, Mr. Zinc is only one of the bad guys here. His associates are far worse than he is.” You answered, checking the time on the screen in the cockpit from the estimated time of your arrival.
“And his associates will be there?” Bucky asked.
“Not even close, they never risk all being at one place at the same time.” You answered, typing into the command code of the cockpit. “You should get some sleep Buck, we have about twelve hours till we get there.”
“Fat chance.” Bucky answered. “You go on ahead, I’ll stay up.”
You glanced at him before shrugging, not pushing the issue, and walking to the deck of the jet once again, flipping out one of the benches and laying down on it, closing your eyes moments later, your arms crossed, and your body relaxed.
Bucky watched you, leaning against the doorway of the cockpit with his own arms crossed. You were so confusing, one moment you're professional, and almost rude, and the next minute you're kind and understanding. He shook his head, trying to figure you out would be like trying to understand quantum physics.
He waited until he heard your breath evening out before he went to the opposite side of the deck, flipped out a bench, and laid down himself. You were right, he might as well conserve his energy since they have a twelve hour wait.
*************
Tags:
@greatenthusiattidalwave @sebbymybaby21 @vicmc624 @cinnamon-bun47 @capswife @440mxs-wife @supersoldiers1xt @missvelvetsstuff @bonnyclydecat @marajade1974 @caity1995 @buckitostan @httpswilloww @cjand10
#bucky barnes#james bucky barnes#james bucky buchanan barnes#sebastain stan#bucky fanfic#bucky x y/n#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky fic
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TRADITION SAYS
k. nanami x fem! reader // w.c 580
a/n: reblogs and hearts appreciated
“It’s bad luck to see me before the wedding.” She softly mused.
The man in question remained remorseless.
His soul, nestled with tradition, which would have typically reeled back in disbelief, succumbed to his unusual impatience by pardoning his decision to dishonour decade-old customs.
His heart was soon to be legally roped by an endless scripture inscribed with not only his consent to this union - but with cursive letters strung to formulate paragraphs brimmed with gratification for the day he was to home a diamond atop her fourth finger - which was finally today.
As her palms manoeuvred south, soothing over the chapels of his exquisite suit of identical textiles, his organ restrained beneath the ensemble of his wedding attire, gently thrummed, reciprocal of her touch as her dainty hands rested a few centimetres above his pectorals
“I’m aware, love,” he expressed lowly, hazel eyes strewn from a melodic harp’s chords studying the orbs, still somewhat surprised he had wandered away from his station, which was to be at the end of the alter, awaiting her presence.
Nanami’s own hand placement remained stitched to her hip, savouring the blanche satin tailored to snuggly sculpt her heavenly silhouette and the stark contrast of the silky fabric enticing the calloused landscape of a working man.
Shame almost derided him and the slight discomfort stirring in his lower half as in a couple of hours; he anticipated the lustrous cloth of white balled within his grasp: the semblance to chaste caressing his thick digits, which had not remained as such, a divine envision.
The opulent fabric was a mere distraction by cloaking practice vows his ardent mouth had smooched against her body during their sexual rendezvouses during their time as boyfriend and girlfriend. Every amorous advancement was instead a bout of devotion he murmured against her soft flesh that permeated beneath her skeletal protection, garnering a shudder, a delicate moan, or both.
As y/n subconsciously nabbed at the navy handkerchief peeking out his breast pocket, she chuckled to herself, visualising Nanami plucking the neatly folded material from its suffocating confines to dab dry the prick of a stream nourishing his waterline whilst witnessing her poised figure leisurely unite with his embrace, the bop of his Adam’s apple a hefty gulp of finality she was to be his under legal pretences, a long-awaited moment and insinuation no man beside himself could sincerely or even attempt to state she was theirs.
Alternatively, Nanami took note of the minuscule embellishments of priceless pearls adorning her customised gown, a semi-extensive width of fragile tulle delicately draped atop her head partnered to complete her wedding look.
He reached behind her head, stepping back once acquiring the matrimonial headpiece whilst she and the time glaring behind them, which had been ushering them to respect both their time allocated slot for this venue and their guests’ effort of reaching here on time, both paused.
The clock’s arms softened, hesitating by a mere second to witness the intimate ceremony between themselves before being observed by a swarm of onlookers.
Her vision became obscured by ivory netting, mascara-coated lashes tickling against the diaphanous veil that now vaguely concealed her beguiling portrait.
In return, she lifted her gaze onto the man she would meet once more in a few minutes to officiate their companionship.
“But forgive me, dear,” Nanami spoke, seeking remission, although his expression of adoration illustrated he didn’t quite care whether his repentance was acknowledged. “I just couldn’t help myself.”.
© stqrlverr all rights are reserved. do NOT repost or copy my work
#jujutsu kaisen#jujustsu kaisen x reader#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#jujutsu kaisen nanami#drabble#stqrlverr
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Stranger part 12
Reader is Telemachus' friend, and when he leaves for his "diplomatic mission" he asks her to watch over his mother.
Later, once the king has returned, she stumbles upon an injured Poseidon.
Previous / series masterlist / character sheet / next
☆☆☆
Content specs: she/her pronouns used, afab reader, Platonic! Telemachus x reader, Epic!Poseidon x reader, possible OOC!Poseidon, Polites’ daughter! Reader, unrequited love, blood, fighting, nudity, illusion, possibly more?, trying to avoid using y/n, slowburn, suggestive themes, English is not my first language, sorry if it's too much exposition, it's my first fic.
Ónoma literally means name in Greek, at least according to google translate. View this as the y/n of this fic.
☆☆☆
“Are you done yet?” Perikles asked, less than amused. Ónoma had been laughing at him for the past, what? 15 minutes? It was way shorter than that, but it felt like ages for the God.
“No, not yet.” It was her turn to tease him. Her laughter would’ve died long ago, but the fact that it bothered him so much kept her going. “Alright, fine, I’m done. Now let’s get you wrapped up, huh?”
She’d added honey to one of her mother’s old ointment recipes to stop his healing wounds from getting infected. She’d left the wounds unwrapped to dry up and form scabs, but it also left them vulnerable. She was going to need new bandages soon.
“You know, I never did find out what caused your wounds.” Peach murmured.
“You never asked, but do you really want to do so now? An answer for an answer, remember?”
“We made that deal an hour ago, of course I remember.” She replied, dumbfounded. What kind of questions did this guy have for her? How bad could they truly be? “Tell me, Perikles, what caused those wounds?” She asked, somewhat smug about finally getting answers.
“My very own trident, wielded by a man who wounded someone I love. I searched for him for 10 years, and when I finally found him, I lost.” All initial smugness was lost on Ónoma, she’d not expected such a raw, honest answer from the man.
“What? Didn’t expect me to answer? A deal is a deal, I’m a man of honour.”
“Making sexual advances on an underage girl? Very honourable.” She remarked sarcastically.
“You’re underage?” The man asked, eyebrow raised.
“Is that the question you want to ask?” She echoed his earlier sentiments. He gave a nod. “Only for another week.” She mumbled.
“What difference does one week make?”
“Was that a rhetorical question, or do you want to get philosophical?” She countered.
☆☆☆
At the end of the day, she was able to retreat to her own space, sure, the cement and stuff hadn’t fully dried yet, but as long as she didn’t touch the walls, it’d be fine. Telemachus had even gone as far as to have a bed placed in the room already. Gods bless him.
The rest of the day had gone by with a lot less serious questions and some really nice dinner. The fish traps had been a success, she’d even brought the excess into town. Aside from their little spat earlier, it has been a good day, but it was not a good morning.
Before sunrise some of the towns people had come to get her, Ophelia was giving birth, but it was about a month too early. By the time she got there it was a bloodbath. Irene, Agathe and their mother were crying over the state of Ophelia. Ophelia’s husband was screaming at the healers, and all in all it was an outright mess.
First course of action: get the unnecessary people out of the room. Irene was easy to deal with, she understood her sister needed help and that they were in the way. She helped Ónoma get her mother and sister out, while Ónoma had the luck to deal with her brother-in-law. Theodosius was erratic, the only way she was able to get him outside, was by knocking him out.
It took them countless prayers to Eileithyia, and Apollo, to get through the birth, and it took until sunset for them to stabilize the mother and her beautiful baby boy. Ónoma was the one to deliver the news, as she’d been there for the shortest amount of time. The other healers, mainly consisting of elderly women, had pretty much collapsed when they were done, absolutely exhausted.
Irene flung herself into her arms, Agathe was trying to explain the news to, a probably concussed, Theodosius and their mother, Zosime, ran inside to see her daughter and grandchild.
☆☆☆
When Peach got back home, she was once again covered in blood, but this time she was able to take a bath without being afraid of the stranger in her home. Sure, she still didn’t really know the man, but she at least knew him better now.
“Where have you been all day, why are you covered in blood? Again? you know what, I don’t even want to know. I don’t want to know, just barge right on in, in the middle of the night, who cares?” Perikles rambled, but she paid him no mind. “I’ll tell you tomorrow.” Peach called through the closed door.
She had put in clean water yesterday, but she couldn’t be bothered to heat it up right now, she just wanted to be clean. And clean she was, by the time she got out her hands were wrinkled, and her skin was rubbed raw. She looked exhausted when she caught a glimpse in the water’s reflection.
Despite the exhaustion, she was tossing and turning all night. She’d tried to eat a peach before going to bed, but she couldn’t, even though she hadn’t eaten all day. Her head was reeling, what was it with Irene’s sisters and giving her trouble. She didn’t blame Ophelia for the circumstances around the birth of her son, not really, but it was interesting.
When the sun started to rise she decided to just get up, without having slept a wink that night. Sleepless nights were becoming a more common occurrence. When Ónoma went into town to get breakfast, she brought some to the new parents, giving the father a somewhat shitty apology for knocking him out. She offered them her help, should when they need it with a newborn on their hands.
When she entered her house, Perikles was awake, but still in bed. “I was gone because the healers needed my assistance, there was a birth that was a month too early, hence the blood, and the first time I’d been defending the queen from… monsters? They were men, but they very well could have been monsters.” She said in one breath, then continued after taking a deep one. “I think that three? Yeah, three answers you owe me.”
“Well good morning to you too.” He smiled at the girl’s rambling. “Say, do you practice archery too? Oh great Apollo 2.0?”
“You want to make it four? Anticlea used to teach me, but she passed a long time ago. I haven’t been able to learn from anyone since. Besides, I’m not devoted to Apollo, if that’s what you’re implying. Please do not compare me to a God, that usually does not end well.”
“Shame, I’m sure he’d love to have you. The perfect devotee.” She blushed at the implication. “I thought you said you weren’t a healer?”
“Five, I’m not, but I do help out when they need it. My mother taught me, but I’m not fully trained.”
“Why didn’t she finish training you?”
“She’s dead. Six.”
Next.
☆☆☆
Taglist:
@apollos-dodgeball-target
@barrythestrawberry041
@doodle-with-rhy
@isla-finke-blog
@suckerforblondies
@trashcannotbealive
#epic the musical#epic!poseidon#poseidon#poseidon x reader#telemachus#telemachus x reader#epic odysseus
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we're at the end of febuwhump!!! thank you all for another super creative year.
tonight, the completionist form will be posted for you to fill in if you filled a prompt each day! plus, the completionist and participant badges will be made available!
please do not send me asks to prove your completionist status, that's what the form is for!
#febuwhump#i am one person with a full time job#i do not have the hours in the day to do this all in advance#approx 11pm gmt the links will be dropped pls be patient thank you
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I get that everyone wants TikTok back but do we understand how bad it is that it’s happening the way it’s happening. Like we do understand how much of a horrifically choreographed process this is to boost and benefit Trump right. Can we all take a second to pause and go “hey wow something’s been getting fucked up and fishy for days now with Trump being turned into the hero about this even by the TikTok company themselves all of a sudden”?? (more chatter in the tags re tech companies and authoritarian autocrats)
#I feel like I’m insane#and the whole country is just happy to download random apps and lose hours of our lives to companies that don’t care#and who are now getting beholden to the most dictatorial and oligarchical authoritarian government our country has had yet#like does anyone else see the changes in wording and communication and talks that the company and Trump have been making or am I genuinely#just crazy#because this whole fucking society makes me feel like I’m the only one who cares to keep my brain filled with minimum manipulation and#propaganda#THIS IS NOT BEING DONE FOR YOU#THIS IS THEATRICS#DO WE NOT GET YHAT#Like. THIS SHOULD BE A MAJOR RED FLAG#look at the way Zuckerberg and Meta have changed the way they talk#and the things they’ve preemptively done to comply and pacify in advance#and then look at what ByteDance has suddenly started saying in certain days#I am Losing My Mind#GET OUT OF THE OLIGARCHS AND AUTOCRATS POCKETS#I AM BEGGING YOU#PAY ATTENTION TO THE WORDS AND DANCES HAPPENING IN FRONT OF YOUR FACES#maybe I really am crazy#I sound like a conspiracy theorist it’s just that all of this is happening so obviously#am I the only one uncomfortable with this? for real? like#2025#politics and current events#TRUMP AND THE TECH COMPANIES ARE NOT YOUR FRIEND#THEY HAVE NO GOOD IN STORE FOR YOU#AND YOU ARE THEIR CURRENCY AND PRODUCT AND GOAL#PLEASE I BEG YOU THINK ABOUT IT#TRUMP STARTED THE BANNING PROCESS HIMSELF FOR A REASON#Zuckerberg et all are turning into cowards with specific plans for a reason#I am begging you to get out of the manipulation and get out of the line of fire
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sneepy cozy time....
#cats#longing to one day hopefully feel sleepy cozy like this again...#There was a pretty cool week here so I thought we had progressed closer to cool fall weather but... NO#..wrong!! It's like 80F in my room right now and was 98F outside yesterday. We get two more 'cooler' days and then#it starts going up again and will be in the high 90s possibly 100 something later this week#in my mind september should be COOOOOLLLL!!!!! or at least STARTING to get there.. Like mid 80s at the highest.#I am going to explode the world with evil wizard powers aaRGHaaHHHHHHHH#OR at least it should get down really low at night. I think thats the main thing is if it's 95 in the day and only 62 for like 3 hours in#the middle of the night then even leaving a fan in windows all night is not enough to fully cool down the house because its just not#enough cold air or cool for long enough. If it were 98 in the day but 15F outside at night then you could probably bring cool air inside al#night and your house would be at a relatively low starting point for the next days heat.#Like for example - in my apartment on a hot and sunny day. Even with every window#closed and blocked off with thick layers of reflective stuff and also not using the stove or doing anything to generate heat - the apartmen#will still go up on average about 6 - 8 degrees in one day. Peaking around 8 - 10pm night time. If I start off with the house cooled down#to 60F. then the highest it would get is 66 - 68 which is tolerable#.But if the lowest I can cool the apartment all night is still only 75F#then it's going to be 81 - 83F by the end of the day. So really it would be bearable (ISH)#for it to be warm as long as it was colder at night.#Though still the IDEAL is to not have to structure my life around envrionmental management and constantly be checking the#outdoor temperature so I can put the fans in the second that it's colder outside than it is inside and putting elaborate curtain systems#up and down at the exact right times and meal prepping 4 days in advance so I dont have to use the stove for 3 days and blah blah blah#Life in the colder weather months is so effortless and breezy in that sense. I can just have the window open all day and get natural light.#I can cook whatever I want. I can wear what I like. I can move around the house freely without needing to always#carry a fan around with me or douse myself in water.#ANYWAY.... oh if only that were me.... snuggled in a warm blanket ... a comforting wintery image...
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i just went to bed, then 15 minutes later got out of bed and turned the lights on, grabbed a pencil and sticky note, and began frantically calculating my total possible annual leave between now and December 2025. Again.
just in case anyone is wondering just how meticulous and obsessive i am over future travel and time off
#it seems more insane in person when you can see how many dates and numbers i wrote down#i do this literally all the time when bored#i never take a day off that isnt travel related lol#i had the chance to do it 3 times this month but instead i decided to work 9 hours days next week and week after next#so that i dont have to take any time#i could also save myself another 2 days leave if i worked 10 hour days the next two weeks after that#but idk if i hate myself enough for that#i also can earn credit time by voluntarily working over timr for up to 3 days total credit.#i use this as much as possible.#aaaaaand i get comp time for other work after hours (like my 5 hours from working on a Saturday in august that i havent touched yet)#i am literally insane about this btw.#my calculations this year assume i am not taking black friday off. if i do i will recalculate#anyway. in case you're ever like 'how does she take all these trips'#the answer is that i just obsessively track every single hour to the point where i'm working a year and a half in advance 😃
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ok prediction time
(it’s my first time playing bg3, i know nothing about the plot; DO NOT SPOIL ANYTHING FOR ME. currently im at moonrise towers and the extent of gale’s plot is that he’s been stabilised by elminster and has also just made the shadow lantern. shoutout to astarion for being the only one not to tell me that was a bad idea, that’s when you know you’re making good life choices)
so what i’m getting from this is that the big moral choice in gale’s story is gonna be to get forgiveness and acceptance from mystra (presumably before/without using the orb) vs embracing his own ambitions and, having a vague idea of the intensity of some of the endings, possibly going way off the deep end with that
while i don’t know the full story for other companions, im feeling like gale was probably the best choice for me in terms of playing an origin because im an extreme completionist and im going to get sage inspiration points all over the place, but im also going to push *everything*. i want to follow every potentiality to its end, make dodgy deals, play all sides, etc.
and surface-level that sounds good for playing as astarion (definitely getting a lot of charlatan inspiration), but what it really means is that i get a lot of approval from astarion and also i feel like it’s gonna affect the way gale’s story ends a lot more. gonna try not to go too far off the deep end but it’s gonna be pretty tempting lmao. i’ll just keep downing these tadpoles and ‘trusting’ my hot dream guy. nothing can possibly go wrong!
#i do save before major decisions in case i regret it and i don’t feel bad about doing that#‘live with your choices’ why? ‘it’s cheating’ i could only be cheating myself and i feel perfectly happy playing this way lmao#i don’t feel bad reloading to retry failed rolls it means nothing to me#personal#bg3#ash plays bg3#gale#it’s exciting finally hitting a big story section where loads of companion quests are advancing#it’s also really cool how all the separate stories are still directly integral to the plot#which sounds like something that should be a given but like. the rpg i’ve played the most in recent months is dai#which has like. a dozen hours at a time that have nothing to do with the main story#bg3 constantly feels like it’s moving forward and each companion’s story is gonna make a difference in the end#i could just be getting my hopes up. like you don’t have to recruit any of them so they can’t be *essential*#but the themes certainly are. especially lae’zel and shadowheart#when do i get to fuck halsin tho? i know about that whole scenario lmao. guess what choice im gonna make there i dare you#(don’t actually tell me when that’s gonna happen!!!!!!!!!! no spoilers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
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i'm begging my uni to stop making every fucking student social activity something where you have to walk around a bunch if you are a slow walker who cannot help it they literally want you dead
#i try to walk as fast as i humanly can. which i shouldn't bc it hurts and makes me dizzy. and i'm still slower than everyone else#last week we divided into groups and had to walk to checkpoints around the city to do tasks#i had a friend in my group who knows abt my issues and they walked slower with me which was nice. everyone else walked like 10 20 meters#ahead and it was fucking embarrassing bc for every checkpoint they had to wait for me#and i felt bad my friend couldn't talk to anyone else in the group bc they were zooming way ahead of us and i'm the one who couldn't keep up#and like. they didn't know my body's fucked. but these are people i do not know well at all and maybe i don't wanna disclose my medical#history to everyone i interact with#and like this event wasn't mandatory. i could've skipped it#but it's every fucking time#most nights we end up going to a bar and to these people “walking distance” is like a half an hour. and they walk fast#i can never keep up#i don't reallu enjoy bars either and i don't drink but you just kinda have to endure to socialize. some days i can't handle it tho#this week there's another checkpoint type activity. i know i shouldn't. i know i'm gonna slow everyone down#but i got specifically asked and invited to be a part of a team. i can't remember the last time that happened#also we're doing a group costume and mine includes platform heels on the streets of a very old city i am so cooked#my friend is nice tho. they know the basic lore and check up on me a bunch which always catches me off guard 😭#i'm used to pushing through and also used to people not really taking my shit into consideration so i don't know how to respond sometimes#2 people in the group know the issues and i just sent the gc a “sorry in advance i can't walk very fast” so like what else is there to do#only accessibility info we're ever given is if it's wheelchair accessible. and that's good. like you should do that. but it kinda ends there#like how much walking is there. where are the stops. are there places to sit.#i love having to either push through or be excluded disabilities are awesome#been in soooo much pain lately and have to take breaks walking uphill. functional body#i live in an area where everything. literally everything. is uphill one way or another. so as you can imagine it's going great#also “you have to endure to socialize” as if i don't end up hovering around my friend like a lost puppy with separation anxiety anyway#the group costume is winx club. btw
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Lotd have mer y ADC looks so good with her new selfie. And she’s posting flowers as usual 🥹
And wearing a white shirt. I'll say this, you can't accuse the girl of not staying consistently on brand 🥴
I will say also, she's never escaping the Victoria Pedretti doppleganger allegations any time soon (although I guess it'd be the other way around since she's older. Whatever) Anyway they neeeeeeed to play sisters at some point cuz what the actual fuck are we doing here like what is the point of all this if that never happens
#anon#I'm sorry in advance but that last one gives me overwhelming AWTR vibes#Lexa's not much of a selfie taker by nature. she just doesn't see the point. “I know what I look like already Clarke-#i don't need to thousand pictures to remind myself. i bet I could even pick myself out of a lineup. no help needed“#cuz she's also a little smartass ya see#but this feels like such a AWTR Lexa thing to do#to have this little disposable camera that she takes with her on their trips - their honeymoon. their rides along the coast. apple picking.#and she just... takes pictures. of anything she feels like. moments that obviously meant something to her#or that's what Clarke assumes when she finds the thing tucked away in Lexa's bedside drawer when she finally packs up to move#2 days before she's heading to the other side of the country and she finds herself sitting on the edge of Lexa's bed holding this gd camera#that she's completely forgotten existed#an hour of trying not to throw up just touching it - an hour of driving to the nearest pharmacy that still prints these damn things -#and a day of waiting for the roll to get developed is enough to have Clarke walking around like the equivalent to an exposed nerve ending#the first half of the roll just makes her smile cuz it's exactly what she expected#pictures of leaves. bumper stickers she saw. shots of the ocean at sunset. a weird rock Clarke distinctly remembers Lexa calling ~majestic#too many shots of Clarke doing mundane things that Lexa apparently thought needed capturing#and then like a suckerpunch to the face... there's this#a shot that Clarke knows without knowing that Lexa took to finish out the roll#probably snapped in a moment of Lexa's little way of saying 'hi :)'#but all it feels like in her hands one last goodbye...#wow this got away from me#my bad#AWTR
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I must say, it's pretty poetic that I've gotten to season 6 of Vampire Diaries right before another solar eclipse happens in America. I certainly didn't plan it, but it does feel like my timing is very appropriate with this one. I do have questions about the accuracy of the eclipse portrayal in the show, though. I mean, a solar eclipse did in fact happen on May 10, 1994, and it was visible across much of the country, so that much is accurate. But I don't think Mystic Falls would've had quite as good of a view as they show it having. For reference, here's a map of the May 1994 eclipse path (credit: timeanddate.com):
And, if you'll remember, Mystic Falls is like two hours from my old hometown just a stone's throw north of Lynchburg, Virginia, as seen on the locator spell map (this one's all over tumblr, forgive me for not remembering what blog I grabbed it from):
So if you zoom in on the timeanddate map and pick somewhere closeish to there:
It looks like Mystic Falls would be getting a little over 77% coverage or so. It's also worth noting that the '94 eclipse was an annular eclipse, not a total eclipse like tomorrow's eclipse. That still means that the moon went directly in front of the sun, but it does mean that it was small enough/far enough from earth that you didn't quite get full coverage of the sun (thanks to weather.gov for the nifty graphic):
So, I'm not positive whether it would've looked quite as dark as was shown in the show:
Although, I must admit, in this video I found on youtube of the '94 eclipse, (part of me is shocked to find footage from then but I know I shouldn't be like yes they had cameras in the 90s) it actually looks more similar than I expected it to look, but I imagine it was most likely filmed within the path of totality:
youtube
But also, when Kai takes Bonnie to Portland, don't they see the eclipse again there? I couldn't find that clip on youtube just now, but Portland barely had any eclipse--only 42-43% coverage, so it would've been way milder of a visual effect, barely any dimming in the sky noticeable without eclipse glasses.
The funny thing is, the area where I live is going to be sitting right around 80% coverage tomorrow. I was lucky enough to get to travel to Missouri for the 2017 eclipse to get into the path of totality, but I'm afraid that it hasn't worked out for me to do so this year, which is immensely disappointing to me as an astronomy enjoyer, but I do still plan to go to an eclipse party and I'm going to start saving to try and get to Spain for the next total eclipse in 2026, which is going to be right around my 30th birthday (screaming). Anyways, it isn't great, but here's my best picture from the '17 eclipse:
I didn't even have a smartphone yet then, because despite it being 2017, I was somewhat of a luddite, so I had the purple flip phone I so stubbornly clung to and a point-and-click Nikon, but I still think this picture is pretty cool for what it is. Here's the zoom in so you can really see that ring of fire (and my shaking hands doubling the image):
Obviously you can find thousands of better eclipse pictures online, but that one's still special to me because it's mine. Anyways, I'll report back with smart phone pictures from whatever I see of the 80% total eclipse tomorrow to compare and contrast with Mystic Falls's 70% annular eclipse of the 90s, because from what I've heard it's going to be much less impressive than full totality was, but I've yet to watch a partial solar eclipse, so I'll just have to find out. Also, if you happen to have any vampiric loved ones trapped in a magical prison dimension who you need help freeing during the eclipse tomorrow, let me know and I'll see what I can do! ;) Hahaha. Anyways, happy eclipse everyone, and may we all possess sufficient self restraint to avoid eye damage (says the woman who has looked at the sun unprotected so many times and is probably going to go blind because of it some day. I know what I've done lol. Don't be me.)
#posts where I actually feel like I'm using my blog as a blog#Solar Eclipse#Solar Eclipse 2024#Solar Eclipse 1994#The Vampire Diaries#TVD 6x02#is where the screenshot's from specifically#Damon Salvatore#Bonnie Bennett#Eclipse History#nerding out over the eclipse in the vampire show#it's also funny to me how two eclipses in my lifetime are so close to my birthday. I think it probably means I have magical powers ;)#May 10 1994#that's two years and change before I was born#April 8 2024#I'm so tempted to ditch all my responsibilities and drive south to totality but it's an 8 hour drive and I'd have to leave at like 4am#if it was a 4-5 hour drive to totality I'd do it. but I think a 16 hour round trip would kill me and I didn't have the good sense to plan#or book a hotel in advance or anything and everything in totality will be booked up for sure. and tonight is the night I would need to be#in a hotel anyways so. missed that boat. I mean I could go now and just drive through the night. but ugh. I just. ugh. I can but I can't yk#anyways everybody says that the Vampire Diaries writing quality drops off around here but I'm still loving it so far#it's incredibly frustrating sometimes but like. it knows how to give me The Feels(tm) and so I'll let it jerk me around all it wants#I would personally prolly want to stay in the prison world for at least a little bit to get to enjoy that eclipse from a bunch of angles th#like that's a rad as heck day to get trapped on imho. Love me a good eclipse#i ramble#even in the tags I ramble#Youtube
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I have a 4 hour 35-person workshop to run tomorrow and cannot be bothered prepping
#i mean i do have a slideshow and talk notes all done#what i mean is i cannot be bothered looking at them again in advance of actually running the day#it is my core business. but. winging it like a true professional#reminiscent of the days of preparing lectures; i'd wake up at 3am to research for 1 hour and compile/write for 1 hour to be ready for 8am#kept my hours to 3 hours total prep and presentation time#i was paid $110 per 1hr lecture so prep time needs must be limited
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Shout-out to everyone who survived a "fun" easter with the family
#fucking hell#it started with finding out my dad smoked in my car when I picked up my sister#who was equally dreading the day#my mum turns into the world's tensest and judgemental presence. worsened by my aunt#then hell for autistic people (of which there are multiple present)#multiple deaf people means one uninspired conversation that isn't interesting in any way.#combinations of passive aggressiveness and people not saying a thing because they can't participate. voice volumes too damn high#weirdass food situations. Very full table. so many smells.#this goes on for over an hour. wishing for literally anything but being there. soul crushing.#then you still have to sit in that room for 2.5 hours. it just goes on and on.#my autistic deaf dad physically looks like how I feel. my mum and aunt keep piling on top of him to demand his mental presence#i leave the room once (to get my phone to show pictures to my uncle) and am immediately followed upstairs by my mum#who demands I don't leave the room (What's next. following me when I need the toilet?)#me and my sister are so bored we start throwing paper planes and fake fighting.#Which amuses the bored and the deaf#but of course my mum and aunt have opinions and this is not allowed. only soul crushing boredom allowed#they complain to each other over it while aggressively doing dishes#finally it ends because my mum and aunt start insisting my dad should go to bed if he's 'that tired'. *sprinkle on some additional ableism*#still sitting through a conversation about allergies one of my sister's friends has. my mum preaching that people should take that seriously#(meanwhile i had to cook for myself for 9 years because when my allergies were really bad no one bothered to check if i could eat something)#me and my sister go sit upstairs to discover our mum has made things we care about vanish in her room#and made things appear that should not be there#I've washed the interior of my car and hope the smell will go#you think it's over after that. but woke up with the realisation that even more things have disappeared from my sister's room.#i can't remember a time when things left outside of my room didn't disappear#I don't know why we do these family gatherings at all. no one has fun on days like that.#the housing crisis isn't making these things easy. my sister is losing her place to live again as well#she'll go hiking for a month and then work on a campsite over the summer#maybe I'll go house sitting again. idk.#can't make commitments a few months in advance like that because I'll cancel everything the second Sparks announces anything important
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#super freaking out cos my friend who is a vet has offered me a job at her practice as a care assistant#so my job would just be to do all the little jobs. help looking after the animals. cleaning. sometimes calling patients etc#it's a fantastic opportunity but it looks so much more difficult then anything i've ever done before#and on the one hand i'm like ''yes! i love animals! i need a steady income! this is perfect!''#but on the other... i haven't been at my current job that long. so it feels like a dick move to up and leave.#i don't know if i'd be able to cope with the animals dying all the time. some of the stuff i'd have to do looks really technical#and i'm scared i'll do it wrong (eg put the wrong label on the wrong medicine) and it'll lead to an animal dying#like it's a proper full time monday-friday 9-5 kinda gig#which is great cos my current job is a ''are we gonna give you more than 2 days next week?? who knows! it's a supprise!!''#and that situation is stressing me out. so i do need something different#but this is like a proper serious job. and idk that's scary#plus my friend would be my boss. which i don't mind. but i dont want her to vouch for me and then i'm terrible at it...#cos that's not fair on her#they've offered me a trial shift next week. so i guess i could do that and just scope it out..#it also feels like nepotism which doesn't super sit right#but it's not a sure thing. the other vets and practice owners have to agree and they may not like me. it's not like i have experience#and it's only a low paid position so if its nepotism its not like... super beneficial nepotism...#sigh. i know i should go for it. just last time i went for a big different job like this it ended badly#and i ended up back in retail.#so i don't wanna go thru that all again#but i also dont wanna stay working in this shop forever. it wouldn't be too bad if only i had regular hours. .#and i knew what those hours were more than a week in advance#i know this is like.. a non-problem. i'm just stressing about it#plus its making me feel guilty whenever i go into my current job. like i'm cheating on them#i do need that regular income tho#screams in anxiety
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