#i do no want to drive 6 hours with three cats

[puppysdog]

we are evacuating tuesday but all this is really stressing me the fuck out

[copperbadge]

I found myself wishing the other day that humans had to sleep for an hour every 2-3 hours. I think this would solve a lot of problems and create a bunch of interesting new ones!

1. Publicly available places to sleep would be commonplace because you'd want to just sleep where you are and keep getting stuff done. You don't want to be commuting to work every 2 hours for example. So you'd do like three waking shifts and then go home for a while, and you'd have a comfy place to sleep at work.

2. I would never have to spend more than two hours doing any one thing and if I did I'd get a break in the middle and wouldn't have to come up with an excuse to go.

3. Clothing would need to be mainly sleepable. Goodbye business casual! Also people who hate getting dressed up fancy (ie me) would have their sacrifice properly appreciated since getting dressed up takes time and demonstrates commitment.

4. Movies would never go more than two hours without an intermission.

5. On the downside, studies have shown that one of the biggest perils to the health of a person in the hospital is the number of times staff changes over while they're there. More handoffs of patients does correlate with more medical errors. If you're handing off every two hours, or four hours at a push, either a bunch more people die, or medical communication has to be a lot better....

6. Which is actually an upside I guess. Probably extends to shift work too, like heavy construction and such.

7. Insomnia in this sort of situation must REALLY suck, though.

8. I suppose it would also suck for people who are Bad At Mornings, I've just vastly multiplied the number of mornings you have to deal with over the course of your life. If you live to the age of 80, you will have had about 29,000 mornings. If you had to sleep eight times a day, you would have like 230,000 mornings.

9. We would probably do something terrible to the ecology of Earth in order to grow enough coffee to deal with that.

10. Driving in traffic or taking long road trips might be logistically complicated. Most plane flights would need like four teams of pilots. Might lead to more mass transit, though.

11. Marathon running just got harder, but I know marathoners and they're all deep weirdos to start with so they'd probably embrace the challenge.

12. I get terrible bed head and would spend most of my time looking like I'd been dragged out of a tree.

I'm sure there are unknown horrors lurking in the idea, but I still like it. I bet all cats everywhere would appreciate it too.

[gretavanlace]

Sugar II (part 6)

Jake Kiszka x reader

18+ only! Minors do not interact!

Warnings: graphic sexual content, illusions to cheating, illusions to oral sex (f rec), language, dirty talk, mutual masturbation, phone sex, etc

Your phone is lying on your chest when it begins to vibrate. Pretend you weren’t waiting for it all you want, your self-deception is laughable even to you. But isn’t that what you’ve become? A miserable joke who spurns the truth with a smile on her face and untruths in her heart.

Lying to ourselves is more deeply ingrained than lying to others, Dostoevsky once said. Wise and brilliant, he was. He also loved someone he shouldn’t have too deeply to let them go.

He is beside you, arm draped across your middle, forehead tucked against your shoulder…so placid and secure in his place next to your wandering mind. So blissfully unaware and peaceful as he dreams of things you don’t care enough to wonder about. But hasn’t he always been? Unaware, that is? He has lived in the dark, oblivious to the fact that he has never truly cradled your heart in his hands.

You are a wicked, black-souled creature, and no one knows that better than yourself. He doesn’t deserve this, and he never did.

Maybe you shouldn’t answer. Maybe. But you will, and you do.

Slipping out of bed like a phantom, you move through the house on silent toes, creeping along until you’re folded into the chair in the far corner of the living room.

“What took you so long?’ His voice drifts out, lazy and quiet, “Hiding from Mr. Wonderful again, are we?”

“You have to stop calling me like this.” You’re quiet, but not like him. Your quiet stems from deceit, and some inexplicable fear of what? Getting caught on the phone? And that’s all this is, right? Just a conversation with an old friend? There’s that self-deception again.

“Stop answering, then.” He counters coolly. Unbothered and wholly aware that that won’t be happening.

“How was the show?” You ask, rather than comment on the ridiculous confidence laced through his tone like sex on his tongue.

“Good.” He sighs, and you can picture his flippant, nearly shy shrug so clearly it grips your heart tightly for a breath. “I may have had a whiskey or three too many. May have tripped. May have fallen. May not have been very rock and roll.”

Your soft giggle tightens his heart just the same, but he doesn’t tell you that. “Did you play through?”

“Of course I played through,” He scoffs with feigned offense. “Who’re you talkin’ to?”

“Then I think that’s very rock and roll, Jake.” The smile won’t leave your voice. “Besides, you misjudged those stairs, don’t blame the whiskey. You should wear your fucking glasses.”

“Oh!” Now he sounds incredibly pleased with himself, dragging the word out like the cat who ate the canary, “Sounds like my sugar caught the show…”

“I may have popped in to peek at a livestream.” You concede, curling down into the chair to get comfy.

“Groupie.”

Pulling the throw off the back, you sling it over your bare legs and shake your head at his nonsense “Miss my Sammy, that’s all.”

“Fuck you.” He laughs.

“Fuck you, too.” You toss right back, but you both hear the love hidden behind those terrible words.

“You miss my stupid kid brother so much, why don’t you come and see him? I could have you on a plane tonight. How long would it take you to get to the airport?” There’s a sincerity in his offer that makes you long to pack a bag and go.

“Jake…”

“Should I send a car, or do you think Mr. Wonderful would mind driving my girl?”

Little shit.

“Stop calling him that.” You scold with little conviction.

“What should I call him then, baby? Since you won’t tell me his name…”

Fighting to sound steadfast, you square your shoulders and issue a warning you don’t feel a drop of in your bones “I’m gonna hang up.”

“Liar.” There’s that gentle laugh of his that echoes through your mind all hours of your lonely days. “What did you do today, sugar? Tell me.”

“Um,” you pick at the blanket absently and search back through the monotony. “I had a work thing. Then I went to the supermarket. Saw a movie. I smuggled a bottle of water inside in my purse like a criminal.”

“I should alert the authorities, but they’ve probably already got your wires tapped.” He’s teasing, but he suddenly sounds so sad. “Did you go to the movies with him?”

You hesitate, which tells him everything without a word.

“Damn,” he’s so quiet now. “I hate that, sweetheart. I hate that so fucking much.”

It makes no sense, he knows you’ve just crawled out of the bed you share with him, he knows that a ring rests on your finger right now - he knows. So why does he sound so broken-hearted? Why this?

“You just go around doing stuff with him, you know?” He clarifies as though he’s heard your unasked question. “Simple little things. The movies. The market. Dinner with your friends. Bookstores. We never really got to do those things together.”

It surprises you, though you aren’t sure why…he’s always been this way, soft and romantic about the strangest things. “You’d want to go to the grocery store with me?”

He laughs as you verbally poke at him to lighten the mood. “I’d go anywhere with you.”

“That’s good. Because I loathe going to the gynecologists alone. Care to attend my Pap smear, Jakey?”

He laughs again, but this time, it’s halting and loud… your favorite of all his laughs, “Absolutely, I do. I’ll steal the stirrups and take them home to use later. The doctor will see you now, sugar.”

You’re laughing now too, likely a bit too loudly “You’re so fucking weird. I feel like I’m talking to Josh.”

“Spending too damn much time with him lately.” He offers by way of excuse, “his shit is rubbing off on me. The other day I briefly considered a perm.”

Your laughter trails off with matching sighs, “I should go.” You say it, but you don’t want it.

“No, you shouldn’t.” He argues quietly, and with a strange tone…he’s fighting something.

“What is it?” You press delicately.

“I just,” he pauses, collecting his thoughts before pouring them out to you. “I just thought you’d be back by now…but you’re still there, with him. And I’m still here.”

“Jake,”

He doesn’t allow for you to finish whatever it was you were about to say that he doesn’t care to hear. “Hush, baby…I know. Do you miss me?”

“Yeah,” you secret into the phone, stealing a glance down the hall. “I miss you very much.”

“Good.” He has quieted to match your whisper. “How much do you miss me? More than Sam?”

“Yeah, I miss you more than Sam,” you see? This is why you’re a bad fucking person. “But like I said, I should go.”

“Why?” There’s that terrible, beautiful rasp again, the one that fails to belie how hard for you he likely already is. “Because you’re afraid you’re going to slide your hands into your pretty panties for me just like you did last night, and the night before, and the night before that?”

It’s a knee jerk reaction that you can’t explain when your finger jabs at your phone to end the call.

He calls back right away, and right away, you answer.

“That wasn’t very nice.” He taunts into the phone with a grin dripping from his accusation. “Don’t you dare hang up on me. Have you forgotten your manners, little girl?”

“Can’t we ever just talk?” You’re struggling to remain on solid ground, but for what? You want nothing more than to sink into him. “Do you ever think about anything else?”

“Other than what?” He counters. “Other than fucking you? Yes, as a matter of fact I do. I think about loving you, and lying beside you like that fuck gets to do. Taking care of you, making you laugh, cooking for you, and drawing you baths, and going to the goddamn movies to watch you smuggle in bottles of water, but you won’t let me have any of that, will you, sugar?”

“I—“ you’re shocked into silence.

“Right.” He agrees, as if you’ve said something poignant. “So forgive me if I indulge where you see fit to allow.”

“Jake, this isn’t right…” oh, don’t you sound righteous? “It has to stop.”

“Isn’t right for who?” He is rife with condescension, “For him? Ask me if I give a fuck about him. Not to ruin the surprise, pretty girl, but I don’t. And maybe you do a little, maybe you do even more than that. Maybe you care more than I’d ever want to know, but you’ll never care enough for it to matter more than you and I.”

No one has ever seen you like Jake sees you…and it is both intoxicating and frightening.

“You want to hang up? Hang up. I won’t call you back tonight.” There’s an edge to his promise, but you know better than to believe it, and you’re thankful it's a lie.

“I don’t want to hang up.” You should want to…but you can’t imagine giving him up right now.

“I love you, sugar.” He breathes, and it’s the loveliest song you’ve ever heard. You want to close your eyes and drift away into it like a symphony. There are cellos and violins in those words, magic and pain more beautiful than anything else you’ve ever known.

“I love you, Jake.” You want him to feel those same things living and breathing inside your own words, but they feel so lacking.

“Do you know what I did this morning?” He questions. You can picture his face so perfectly, and you long to touch it, to simply run the back of your hand down his cheek.

“Hmm?” You hum, still lost in the daydream of being near enough to touch him, to soak in the warmth of his skin.

“I tuned the piano in our front room.”

You know right away that he means the house he visits in the corners of his mind, the place he keeps just for you.

Your gaze has drifted out the window. If you look hard enough, you can almost see the house in the distance, windows glowing golden with light and love “You did?”

“I did. You’re teaching the girls now. I wanted it to be perfect for the four of you.”

“I don’t know how to play the piano, Jakey.” You tease, staring harder still at the mirage of your make believe home.

“Yes, you do. I taught you. You took to it right away, and now you’re better than Sammy, even. You play like an angel. And sometimes, when the girls are asleep, we make love on it and scatter notes around the room in the night.”

Your hand finds its way into your panties all on its own, but it’s innocent somehow, gentle. “We make love on the piano?”

“We make love everywhere, sugar.” He hushes, “I’ve slipped inside of you against the maple tree in the backyard in the Autumn while it drops its leaves at our feet. I’ve nestled my face between your thighs on the porch because you like to watch in the moonlight. Bent you over the kitchen sink so you’ll forget about the dishes, in a closet or two when the girls were too busy to notice, in the dirt in the garden, everywhere.”

A soft moan you attempt to swallow escapes you as your fingers sweep, wet and warm, across your clit.

“What was that, sweetheart?” The smugness in his query is so loving you forget to be annoyed with it, “Are you touching yourself imagining all the places I’ve made you mine? All the places I’ve taken you and made you shake, over and over and over?”

“Tell me,” you beg, slipping your leg over the arm of the chair, opening yourself up for him, offering something he isn’t here to take. “Talk to me. Tell me.”

“That’s my girl,” are you imagining the sound of his zipper through his praise? “What do you want to hear? I’ll talk to you all night, sugar…talk to you forever. Until my voice gives out.”

“The porch,” Another brush against your aching clit, another airy moan you fail to quiet, “Tell me about on the porch.”

“Yeah? You want to hear all about how I lick your pretty pussy on the front porch until you’re dripping down my chin? Want me to tell you about how good you taste, and how sweet you sound when you whine and rock against my mouth?” His voice is like sandpaper smoothing out the frayed edges of your heart. And you most definitely heard his zipper.

“Jake, please…” you would give nearly anything for him to materialize in the room. To listen to his boots clip across the hardwood as he moves, closing in on you until you’re trembling with anticipation.

“Shh, sugar…” he clicks his tongue in mock sympathy, “We wouldn’t want to wake Mr. Wonderful. He doesn’t belong on this porch with us, does he?”

“Tell me.” Your demand falls short through another shaky sigh.

“It’s late, baby,” you can hear it now, the rhythmic, slick slide of his fist along his cock, “and we really should go inside and go to bed, but I can’t take my eyes off of you, you look so fucking stunning in the starlight. You’re curled up next to me in the thinnest, whitest nightie, and I can see the tops of your thighs. So soft and smooth. And I only want to kiss them, but the second I’m on my knees you’re spread open for me like you’ve been waiting for my mouth.”

You’re so wet you can almost pretend your fingers are his tongue drawing tight circles exactly where you need it “And then?”

“Then I slip your panties off, and you give me a little shit about it just for show, but you shut up quick when I start licking along the insides of your thighs. You smell so fucking good, and you taste like heaven, and my cock is so fucking hard for you, but I don’t care about that, all I care about is getting my mouth on you.”

“Do I really taste that good, Jakey?” You pant, arching away from the back of the chair as you slip inside your warmth and fish for compliments.

“You do, baby.” His breath drags in and out of his lungs hard and fast. “You taste so sweet…prettiest, pinkest pussy I’ve ever kissed, you taste like home, you taste like my sugar.”

“Fuck, I’m—“

“Slow down.” He interrupts, sounding gentle in a way he seldom does when he’s hard and throbbing for you. “You just go real slow for me and listen.”

You nod, and though he can’t see you, he seems to feel it all the same.

“I’m on my knees against the porch you helped me strip and sand, and you’re spread open for me on the swing. It creaks every time you move. Your hands are in my hair, but you’re being such a gentle girl, fucking your lovely cunt up into my mouth, begging me softly to suck your spoiled little clit, begging me to make you cum.”

With your fingers fluttering light as air, you can almost imagine it all to be real, and you’re close…so close.

With a choked gasp of your name he pauses, but recovers in a blink, “You’re whining for my fingers, but I want to get you there just like this. I don’t want anything in the way when you finally let go on my tongue. I want to drink you down, baby…every drop. It’s all mine, and I want it. And you let me have you that way, don’t you?”

“Yes,” you nod frantically, writhing in the chair until the blanket falls away, forgotten.

“And you’re going to be such a good girl for me, huh?” That, leading, teasing tone has joined the party, and your stomach is twisting and turning, wringing the lust out of your very soul, “You’re going to be the sweetest little sweetheart and cum right in my mouth because I’m just so fucking thirsty, aren’t you?”

“Oh fuck, Jake…” you’ve hardly made a sound, your constricted throat won’t allow for much more, “Say it again.”

He knows what you want, and like always, he gives it to you without question or thought. “Want you to cum in my mouth right here on the porch, you beautiful fucking filthy girl. I want you, sugar…c’mon and make a mess on my tongue.”

“I’m gonna cum,” you’re spread wide and thrusting into your own touch, but it’s Jake you feel…he’s everywhere, all around you, you’re drenched in him.

“Of course you are, sweetheart,” he soothes, sounding near the end himself, “Because you know how badly I want it, and you’re my girl.”

“I’m your girl,” you whimper, desperate for more more more… “I’m your fucking girl, Jakey. I love you…”

“Love you too, sugar,” a growl rumbles out of him low and menacing. “Love you so fucking much. Come on, baby, c’mon…”

With a fist drawn to your mouth and your teeth dug in deeply, you let it happen. Welcoming that sparking, searing, electric bliss only he seems to be capable of gracing you with, no matter how near or far he happens to be.

You’re quiet somehow, but he doesn’t seem to need anything more than your muted gasps to get there with you. Though on his end, he sounds feral and violent…like the beautiful, seedy underbelly of something you shouldn’t want. Pornographic and obscene. Improper. Dirty. Wrong. Perfect.

With the calm of the afterglow, comes the shame. The guilt. The self-hatred. He knows it all too well already, and rather than drawing attention to what has just happened, he shifts focus to help you through.

“I might order room service. If you were here right now, what would you want? That’s what I’ll get.”

“Hmm,” you think it over, kicking the blanket up from the floor to recover a bit of modesty, “Soup sounds good. Broccoli cheddar if they have it.”

“Soup?” There’s that wide open laugh of his again.

“Yes.” You pretend-pout. “And don’t laugh at me. It sounds divine.”

“Soup it is, sugar.” He sounds soft and a little unlike himself. “We’ve got a small break coming up. It’s only a couple of days, but what if I came to see you?”

“Jake,” you’re preparing to wage a loving war, though you want to see him more than you want the air you breathe to quench your lungs.

“I just want to take you to the movies, that’s all,” he holds up his metaphorical hands innocently. “Will you go see a flick with me? No illegal bottles of water necessary.”

“You want to go to the movies?” You laugh at the idea of it all. So PG in a manner so… not Jake.

“Yep.” He sounds positively delighted at the mirth in your response. “Bring Mr. Wonderful, we’ll have a great time.”

You roll your eyes, stretching out your limbs, which have been tense and contorted for far too long, “Oh, don’t be silly, Jacob, like I would ever share you with Mr. Wonderful.”

Taglist: @gretasintrees @greta-van-chaos @celestialfauna @s0livagant @groggyvanfleet @kiszkathecook @brokenbellz @llightmyllovee @doodle417 @seventieswhore @jake-kiszkas-smirk @weightofdreams-gvf @imdepressedaf1996 @alisonwonderland29 @gretavanfleas @gretavangroove @jakesgrapejuice @sparrowofthedawn @xserenax-13 @tbagggvf @obetrolncocktails @tripthelightfandomtastic @tripthelight-fanfic @jakeslovehandles @poofyloofy @70sgroupielovr @heatmyfleet @age-of-nyahh @sammiboo162 @gretasmokerising @spicedandicedtea @jakekiszkasleftnutsack @saoirsemaeve @mywickeddivinity @thelvnternskeeper @paintmyhouse @mckenna4 @sarakay-gvf @theweightofjake @thewritingbeforesunrise @joshsmama @sammysvanfeet @rhythm-of-space @highladyofasgard @jordie-gvf-admin @calumspretty @sad1lynn @demolitionndann @gvfpal @starcatcher-jake

[gobitobi]

Rodrick x fem or gen reader

Just some bf/relationship head cannons (and maybe some drabbles you have for him..🤗)

and ur intro is soo real making gear is so fun hard work but yk! 💗

RAAAAHH A RODRICK ASK 👹 here’s a little drabble i wrote for him a while ago, i can do a list of headcanons though soon if you want :]

enjoy!!!!

so we all know he’s not great around the people he likes, like accidentally embarrassing himself with the stuff he does or says

but when he’s talking to you about his band, he accidentally fumbles and goes “our number one song is called ‘exploded diper’”

right when he knows he slipped up, you start laughing and say “sounds like a song i’d put on repeat!”

since then he’s absolutely SMITTEN by you. he found the one who can handle his bs 😍

one day he asks you out, but he doesn’t exactly SAY that he wants to take you on a date, he just comes up to you and goes “plainview’s annual fair is opening on friday, wanna go? you and me?” and when you ask who else is going he gets all flustered and says “well, i just thought you and i could go and spend some time together! you know? get to know each other a bit more without the boys around!” but you see RIIIGHT THROUGH HIM 😭 (he’s oblivious it’s adorable)

so when that day comes around, he’s obviously super nervous.

first thing he proposes when you enter the fair is playing the games!

so he goes up to one of the game booths where he’s given three darts and he has to throw them at the balloons in order to win a prize

he does miss the first two but gets the last one!! that earns him a little beanie baby cat. he hands it to you. “i don’t really have a purpose for this,” he says nervously. you smile and thank him, moving on.

you end the night with him driving you back to your place in his löded diper van, blasting heavy metal

he pulls up to the front of your house. it’s dark outside, you’ve been out for about 6 hours at this point. it’s way past your curfew.

you’re just about to get out of the van when rodrick grabs your wrist, stopping you. “wait, i, uhm…” he starts, but his voice trails off. he just stares at you. his grip on your wrist loosens. “actually, never mind. goodnight, [name.]” he sets his hands back on the wheel and looks forward.

you suddenly feel a surge of confirdence come over you. before you hop out of the car,  you grab his chin between your thumb and pointer finger and pull him towards you, kissing him lovingly for a few seconds. you pull back and smile. “good night, rodrick. thanks for taking me out,” you say before you hop out of the van and walk to your door.

he’s STUNNED. the whole drive back to his house seems like forever because he can barely focus on the road.

you… just kissed him. you, the person he had been crushing on since he first laid eyes on you. you made the first move. god, it was a dream come true for him.

he comes into his house with a stupid grin on his face. “welcome home, Rodrick, how was the fair?” susan asks. she’s in the kitchen cleaning up after dinner. rodrick just says, “oh, uhm… it was great. had a great time. i’m tired now, so i’m gonna go to sleep. good night mom.” he kicks his shoes off at the door and darts up the stairs to his room.

at the top of the stairs, greg stands outside of his room with his arms crossed. the brothers make eye contact for a few seconds before greg speaks. “you kissed [name,] didn’t you?” he asks. rodrick lets out a grunt as his response as he stomps into the attic, aka his room.

for the rest of the night, he lays in bed, unable to sleep. he’s SO excited to see you again. to kiss you again.

[lemon-russ]

I made a new blog just to get the worms out of my head put in there by everyone writing bully Cato Sicarius fics. Heavily infected/ inspired by the diplomat/ Cato stuff, I needed to make my own tropey garbage fic.

I blame all of you WH40k smut writers for this. I love you all and you've made me very ill over these murder machines. I must put them in situations.

Part 1/ ???

part:: 1 :: 2 :: 3 :: 4 :: 5 :: 6 :: 7

Cato Sicarius x F!Reader

CW: Violence, blood, I mean it's warhammer I think you get what you pay for there, no sex yet but there will be later, Cato being a bully (mildly honestly)

Summary: Cato is forced to accompany Guilliman's ambassador to a meeting. Things go sideways.

word count: 1,896

Cato walked next to the little diplomat. He hated this. Hated that he was assigned to look after- to babysit- this pompous noble woman.

This whole thing was a waste of his time. He just got back from a mission quelling some rebellion on a random planet in the backwaters of the galaxy. He was already annoyed at how quickly the rebellion was quashed, they did not need to send him, the Knight Champion of Macragg, any random band of Astartes would have handled it.

Then he got home, already in a sour mood, and Guilliman told him maybe he needed a break- a break- and assigned him to escort his little diplomat pet to her next meeting off world. No amount of argument changed his genefather's mind, and he was ordered to “Quit whining and get out of his hair for a moment”.

He didn't want to push his already stressed Primarch further and resigned himself to his fate, three days wasted babysitting this stupid, base human woman. He couldn't stand her, the way she bat her eyes to get people to sway to her opinions, the lavish gowns she insisted on wearing to each meeting, the droning on and on for hours about nothing every time she met with an ambassador she knew. how are the kids, that dress is flattering, I heard your planet had a celebration- it was driving him mad.

Cato watched her walk all prim and proper in a ridiculous trailing gown. A tripping hazard, more like. He smirked a bit as he got an idea, and casually placed his next step on the tail of her dress.

With a small yelp, she fell over, her ridiculous heels not affording her the balance to recover from a sharp snag on her gown. She spilled her papers on the floor and landed in them face first. She looked ridiculous, and he smiled for the first time in weeks. He even let out a chuckle. “Oh my. Careful, Ambassador. That dress is not great for the uncoordinated.” He said with an edge of mocking, playing coy.

She huffed, frowning like an angry little cat as she scrambled to her knees, scooping up her paperwork. “I think I'd be a lot less accident prone if I wasn't being followed by a seven foot tall hazard.” she snapped, scrambling up to her feet and trying to fix her dress.

Cato tried to school his face to not grin at her reaction. “I have no idea what you mean, Ambassador. I simply was following you as always.” he said casually, following again as she stomped back down the corridor.

She was being sent to broker the handover of a planet, giving them a chance to willingly join the glory of the Imperium before they would be recruited by force. They walked down the flagstone halls of an over-pompous but still somehow rundown manor where the leader of this human group insisted on meeting.

He scoffed- a planet who's only excess was stones and sand. Their was nothing they could broker worthwhile, this whole meeting was merely a shakedown to save human lives. Yet the leader of this rock acted like he was doing them a favor by even meeting with them. The arrogance of it all made Cato's anger rise again. He considered tripping the ambassador again to blow off steam, but held off. If he did it too often, the fun would wear out.

She kicked her heels off the flagstone as she agitatedly continued down the corridor to the large double doors to the leaders war room. They were of course, impractically, also made of stone, and requires a turning mechanism to slowly open.

The leader stood at a war table, looking smug and watching them as the doors were slowly opened. They stepped in and Cato was on guard immediately as they started closing the doors behind them. He could push the doors open himself, but it would slow him down if they needed to escape.

The diplomat greeted the Leader, who introduced himself as something Rolfar- he wasn't paying attention, instead still scoping the room. there were small windows in the stone maybe 20 feet up, the stone doors behind them, and then... no other exits. He scowled to himself and stood at attention behind the ambassador, hand itching for his bolter. They'd inadvertently walked into a kill box, if thing went sideways.

The ambassador noticed his distraction and raised a brow, but was pulled back to the discussion. Uhg, more drivel. How are your seasons here? your manor is very impressive, how's your family. He started tuning out again at the mindless small talk. Why can't she ever just get the to the point? Give us your planet or die, boom, done. He should be the ambassador, really.

He snapped out of his inner monologue when he noticed some of the guards around the room exchanging glances. His mouth twitched a frown and his hand slowly came to rest on the hilt of his power sword, the Talassarian.

The ambassador was oblivious as always, laying out papers on the table and talking cheerily to the leader, pointing out resources they would gain access to as part of the Imperium, of course sprinkling in things like how they'll be converting to the Imperial cult in a matter of fact way. The man glanced at a guard near him, giving a slight nod.

That's it, this is all too suspicious now. Cato walked over and put a large hand on the diplomat's shoulder. “Ambassador, could I share a word with you in the hallway-” he started in a low voice, but was interrupted when he saw the soldiers around the room reach for their weapons.

His senses honed. He could think faster, react quicker than baseline humans like these. They hardly twitched toward their rudimentary weapons before he had the diplomat on the floor, bolter out and taking out the first soldier to actually draw his weapon.

Chaos broke out, figuratively of course, and he was forced to actually do his job and protect the stupid woman. It would be fun honestly, tearing through the rebels in a closed death cage, if he wasn't forced to shield the emperor-damned woman beneath him. She was still confused and processing what happening- by the throne she was slow- while he took out a few more of the guards. But for every one he shot, another took a shot at her from the other side, forcing him to move to cover her with his power armor.

He scowled to himself. having to protect her slowed him down enough that they got a foothold, surrounding them, weapons trained on her as they knew they wouldn't touch him. She of course was useless, cowering pathetically against his kneeling body for protection.

well fuck. His hands were tied. That didn't usually happen. “Hands up or we kill the woman!” the soldiers demanded. He let out a sigh and holstered his bolter, hands up. He probably could tear his way out of here, but he wasn't confident he could do it without the ambassador getting shot. stupid woman, some sort of flack armor would be more practical than this stupid flowy dress, and she could at least wear a helmet-

His inner rambling was interrupted by the leader- Randolf? Rolf? -speaking at them smugly. “You thought I would simply roll over and let you interlopers take my world? Your arrogance is astounding” He chuckled with a sneer. Cato considered shooting him, but knew the diplomat woman would be shot for it. He still considered it. No. Lord Guilliman would be mad if he let her die. Uhg, she's ruining everything.

The leader had the ambassador woman taken away first, cuffed and blindfolded. She struggled against them, for a small amount of her credit, but a swift kick from a solider put a stop to it. Cato grimaced. He almost felt bad seeing someone else be mean to her. Probably just because his duty is to stop that though.

“Try that again and I'll turn this room into a red mist.” Cato warned with a glower at the soldier. Guilliman would be more upset if she came back battered, and he'd rather not be punished to anymore menial work. The man who kicked her shivered under his look, and took a step back.

The leader frowned in annoyance at him. “Please, you are in no position to give demands.” He mocked, then walked over and gave the diplomat a firm kick in the ribs, making her yelp and fall over. Before he realized he was moving, he had the man by the collar, and the sound of two dozen weapons readying echoed off the stone walls. The man looked shocked, then terrified, but stuttered out anyway, “Unhand me or the girl turns into a colander.” His voice shook, but the sound of warming up weapons made Cato grit his teeth and lower the man.

as soon as his feet touched stone he scampered away like a cowardly mouse, cowering across the room. “Take her, and keep your weapons on her. I swear if you make one move we'll end her!” He stammered. His soldiers started dragging her out of the room and Cato grit his teeth harder. Fuck. If he'd ignored that, they'd probably have let them leave together, and he could have gotten them out when the doors opened like he planned. Why did he grab that man? Fuck.

He scowled, watching them drag her out the doors, mind scrambling for a new plan. He scoped the room for communication devices. The soldiers carried some, but the room itself had nothing. Okay, he can salvage this, take them out before the vox to their friends, kick down the door, find the girl, get back to the thunderhawk. He can work with that. Thankfully these people were as stupid as they were arrogant, and lacked most advanced defenses and weapons that the Imperium had.

He waited a bit after they took her away, letting them put him in cuffs- wow they really were stupid to think this would hold him- and letting them take his bolter and the Talassarian and put them across the room. He counted in his head as the Leader droned on and on about how his world would not bow to tyrants, same old nonsense everyone spouted when they resisted the Emperor's light. When he was pretty sure the others were out of earshot- he heard them walk away pretty far, baseline humans wouldn't hear the screams- he stood, making the soldiers ready their weapons.

“What are you doing? Sit back down!” The leader demanded, stepping back defensively. Cato snapped the cuffs and smiled. Finally, he could teach these fools the glory of the Emperor's Imperium.

A few minutes later, Cato forced the stone doors open, re-affixing his blood soaked power sword to his hip and adjusting his helmet, flicking his hands and splashing the blood off his gauntlets. Now to just find the stupid woman and hope they didn't already execute her. His genefather would be pissed if she died. And he wouldn't admit it, but the thought gave him an unfamiliar feeling in the pit of his stomach. Probably just dedication to even the most menial duties like this, he decided. Definitely just that.

[da-rulah]

hi💆

I fucking love your content and I have a little request...

Here me out, Sexting with Mary Goore🏋‍♀️

Aww thank you so much, lovely!! I love that I'm getting Mary requests now, ever since writing my first Mary fic (which I just updated today, by the way 👀)

You want sexting with Mary Goore? Well, this is how I think that would go... fair warning, it's filthy. just as you'd expect with Mary.

GN!Reader, NSFW MDNI 18+

TW/ Fingering, masturbation, nude taking, filming self

(ps. if any artists see this and fancy recreating some of Mary's pics...... y'know, i wouldn't mind that... 👀)

You'd wanted a reaction, but this? This was beyond even what you could have thought.

14 text messages, 6 missed calls, and 2 failed video calls.

All Mary.

It was just a harmless little booty pic, something to tide him over until the next time you got to see your boyfriend. but to Mary it had been the final straw, the last of the sticks to be pulled from his game of kerplunk... And his marbles had been teetering all day, thinking about you, missing you...

The last text really caught your attention, after purposefully ignoring him just to wind him up.

If i wasn't on the road right now ur front door woulda lost its hinges. answer ur fuckin phone.

It sounded vaguely threatening; you liked that.

Sorry, my neighbour's cat needed a bath. A stupid lie to piss him off further. What's up?

What's up? u rlly gonna ask me that? You laughed at your phone, taking a seat on your couch as you waited for the three dots that were ominously typing still. My dick, that's what's up.

Sounds like a you problem. There was a brief pause, and you liked to imagine Mary was staring at his phone with an eye twitching in annoyance.

gonna make it ur fuckin problem, u started this.

A few moments later, you received a picture message; a close up of Mary's hand, donning his signature signet and skull rings, boney and veiny and large, gripping his bulge in his tatty jeans just below his leather belt. Immediately, your stomach flipped at the picture. He knew exactly what he was doing. Game on.

You alone?

Very.

Good.

With confirmation of his situation, you decided to turn up the heat. Resting your phone against a pile of books on your coffee table, you sat on the edge of your couch and removed your shirt. You set the self-timer to 10 seconds, and got into position.

Spreading your legs, you placed both hands between them to 'hide' your core. To show off the curve of your waist and hips, you leaned your shoulders forward, the figure he adored and desperately wanted to touch protruding and accentuated in the position you sat. The mix of skin, but not too much, and suggestion would drive him insane.

Satisfied after a couple of takes, you sent the best one and waited.

On his end, Mary stared at his phone with a twisted smirk, palming the bulge in his jeans. He fucking loved your nudes, always way more tasteful, artistic than previously less imaginative partners. They were always so much sexier than a standard dick pic or titty pic, of which he'd received many of the years.

u look gd enough to eat. u know what ur doing to me?

You giggled at your phone screen, typing out your reply.

no... will you show me?

Oh, he'd love to.

Mary set up his phone similarly to yours, resting it against a pile of laundry at the end of the motel bed he was lounging on. He removed his own shirt, undid his belt and pulled his erection from his confines, allowing himself a few quick tugs to keep the desperation at bay.

Then he set the self timer and leaned back, one hand behind his head and the other holding his erection in plain sight.

When he sent you his picture, all you could think of was crawling up between those skinny legs of his and riding him into the early hours. You fucking missed him. You ached for him.

u see, baby? all u.

This smug bastard knew the effect he'd have on you. He was smirking in the fucking picture. Time to one-up him...

You stripped from your clothes completely, once again setting your phone up on your coffee table. This time, you knelt on the couch with your knees apart, your ass to the camera, and leaned over the back of it, arching your back to show off the roundness of your ass for him.

When you sent it, Mary audibly cursed to himself. God, you looked delectable... he could clearly see your sex between your legs, so clearly aroused and presented to him. If only he were there...

aw baby, u wanna b fucked from behind? u know i'd take you in a heartbeat...

His text had you squirming where you sat, biting your lip as your hand travelled between your legs. With one hand, you typed back a reply.

Love when you fuck me like that... you get so deep, miss that

Mary groaned as he fucked into his fist, uncontrollably at the visions of previous exploits where he'd done exactly as you'd described. This was torture, his hand would never compared to being wrapped up and squeezed by your tightness.

just u wait til i come home...

can't wait... my fingers don't do the job anywhere near as well. you teased, slowly stretching out your hole as you leaned back into your couch, whining at the feeling.

ur touching urself now?

You smiled, picturing Mary's reaction. You could be so cruel, just reply with a yes and leave it to his imagination. But you were feeling particularly spicy today after too long without him.

So instead, you set up your phone again and took up the same position as your last picture, this time hitting the record button. To the camera, you coated your fingers in your spit, sucking them into your mouth before using them to push two inside you, teasing as your digits disappeared.

You whined his name wantonly, your intention to sound like the whore Mary turned you into. He always loved the noises you'd make for him.

The video lasted less than a minute when you cut it off with a giggle, ending on a close up of your smirking face as you'd turned the video off.

Does that answer your question?

Mary lost his mind. How dare you stop the recording. How dare you moan his name like that.

He'd had enough, the teasing too much for him to handle.

Instead of texting back, he instead his the little video camera icon by your contact name, the line ringing a few times as he was met with his own face putting the camera back at his feet, pants now completely discarded in favour of total nudity much like you.

You let it ring a few times, setting it back down against the books and hitting the answer button as you sat back into the couch, legs crossed and hiding yourself from him.

"You get back in that fucking position right now," he told you, voice gravelly and dark.

"Aw, you not gonna say please?"

"No. Get back up on your knees and show yourself to me. Let me see the mess you're making."

You bit your lip and did as he asked, spinning and kneeling back on the couch.

"You know what to do, baby..." he told you, the slick sounds from his end of the call sending shivers down your back as he stroked himself.

You did as you were told, re-enacting the short video you sent him as he watched. Mary guided you through it, telling you what to do, how to fuck yourself for him to his exact specifications. He edged you for almost an hour, and himself along with you.

It always blew your mind how Mary was able to give you the most mind-shattering orgasms, even from hundreds of miles away...

[mysouleaten]

raining cats and dogs ! [pt 3]

tokyo rev cats/dogs x gn! reader

summary ... it only started with [name] taking in two strays when they were driving home from work, it was pouring and the two poor strays were soaked! you couldn't leave them… so you took them in

warnings ... fluff, fluff, fluff, and more fluff, weird dude

[part one] [part two] [part three].... [part four]

you were sitting in the pet clinic for over four hours. the sun was setting and the moon was slowly rising

you looked down at your phone '6:14 pm' was the time

you looked up at the door where the people took your new rescue

you slumped back into your chair, hoping this would soon be over, you had two other cats at home waiting for you

you sat up when you saw a man with a box --and a towel covering it-- come out, he looked around and then put the box down on the counter

"mx...[name]?" he hesitantly asked

"yep, that's me!" you said and stood up to walk the man in the white coat

"ah! yes, so your cat is in the box here" the man patted the box softly and continued "we stitched him up, gave him some pills, and gave him his rabies shots... he was a stray correct?"

"yep, he was.. found him somewhere, I didn't want to leave him, ya know?" you scratched the back of your neck

"I know what you mean, its good that your bright him here, another minute and the poor thing would have died," he said and continued, "I think you also brought two others before here right?" he asks

"yeah I did" you nod

"mhm, well here you go" he handed you a pill bottle "these are for him after he wakes up, make sure he eats one every day, they are vitamins and pain relievers"

"okay got it, do I feed them by themselves or with food?" you ask

"they are bitter so yes you can feed them with food" he nodded "oh and before you go, please make another appointment after a week, alright? I wanna make sure he's healthy"

you nodded again and carefully took the box into your arms and left the clinic. something about that guy... rubbed you the wrong way.. maybe it was just you

you carefully put the box into the casket in front of your motorbike and sat down and started the engine

you looked at the clinic again and the same guy was standing there with his hands behind his back, you shivered then drove off

'maybe I should find another clinic..' you thought

you drive into your apartment complex's parking lot and park next to your car

turning off your motorbike and grabbing the box and putting it on the sidewalk, turning back to your bike you grabbed the chain from under the seat of the bike and wrap the chain through the bike's wheel and warp the chain around a poll finally locking it

it's better to be safe than sorry was what your brother says to you, plus this is his bike and you don't want it stolen

turning to the box where your new fluffy friend is in. picking the box up and walking towards the stairs and up

you unlock the door and close it back when you step into your home

"im home!" you say, then you hear small paw steps and meows coming from your room

you saw take' and peachy run towards you, meowing their little hearts out too you

crouching down with the box in your lap "heeey, sorry for being so late! I found this little guy!- or well he's kinda big actually, hahah"

peachy and take' step up with their front paws on your knees and try to take a peek into the box

"be careful alright? the big guys hurt.. found him at a car dump.. lots of other cats there too" you say

but you didn't see take' 's eyes widen and he stepped off your knee. peachy takes a step back too when you stand up

"ok how about you guys name your new friend while I make food?" you say as you put down the box on your window seal. peachy and take' jump up there

you stare down at the box before you hear a meow then you look at peachy

"haha this is a bit creepy isn't it?" you ask and she meows as to say 'yes'

you scratch the back of your head "well keep him safe ok? I'll go make food now" you say and back away from your cuties

coming back once more to give peachy and take' kissies on their heads, they seem to appreciate the attention

you even see take' cover his face with his paws and peachy snuggling into take' 's body

you retreat into the kitchen to set the food for your friends and an extra bowl for the new friend

how lucky are you to have another friend?

you didn't even realize how many more friends are soon gonna join your family

taglist... @sixxze @ploxpoke @q-the-rockaholic @dancingnewcat @ariachaos @cashout-princess

if anyone would like to be part of the tag list for this series please let me know!!

[quinloki]

My apolocheese in advance for this, but all 50??? 😀 (Excluding any you may have answered already and/or don't feel up to answer)

Feel free to discard this ask entirely, or answer it in portions whenever you have energy. Whatever works for you. ^^ Just don't overwork yourself (ironic ik, coming from the guy who's asking for all 50, but I can't help it <3)

You know what - sure. XD

I'm going to put this below a cut though, cause whew!

who is/are your comfort character(s)? Marco definitely, but I find comfort in a lot of characters, so I should include Kid, Sabo, Crocodile, Doflamingo, Thatch, Penguin and Law in there too.

lighter or matches? Man I love a good zippo, but nothing beats the smell of a match, so I'll have to go with matches

do you leave the window open at night? Not unless I absolutely have to.

which cryptyd being do you believe in? Are ghosts as a general classification close enough? I've seen like three, but I haven't seen any other cryptids.

what color are your eyes? Brown ^_^

why did you do that? Sometimes I do not even know. I let go of a pot the other day for no good damned reason and was just glad it was empty.

hair-ties or scrunchies? Hair-ties. There's no scrunchie in this 'Verse that can contain my hair.

how many water bottles are in your room right now? In my room like my bedroom? Or as in the room I'm in right now? In either case it's zero. I have this spiffy mason jar monstrosity for water and it's down in the kitchen atm.

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee? Caffeine, honestly, is what I prefer XD Coffee's crap unless I make it myself so I don't even really register the flavor of it most of time.

would you slaughter the rich? Hm... ... no. I can't say I'd protect or defend them, but my sinful ass isn't going to go around casting judgements on others, no matter if I think they deserve it or not.

favorite extracurricular activity? >.> <.< I mean... I can't really say anything other than sex at this point.

what kind of day is it? A middling Sunday. The sun is pleasant, my cats are napping and look egregiously adorable, but there's still the weight of unemployment on the house, so it's middling.

when was the last time you ate? About 5 minutes or so ago. Rice and veggies.

do you love the smell of earth after it rains? Most certainly ^_^

are you a parent? (all answers qualify) lol not even a little.

can you drive? Better than most. My grandfather taught me with a bag of apples, but I don't really enjoy driving so I don't do it much.

are you farsighted or nearsighted? Whichever it is that needs glasses to see.

what hair products do you use? Cheap ones >.>

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails? If you wanted, certainly, but I have bit my nails since I was 8 so my skill at nail painting does not exist ^_^;

do you say soda or pop? Previously answered, but the short answer is soda.

something you’ve kept since childhood? My friend John. We became friends when we were 5 and 6 and I still play D&D with him on the weekends.

what type of person are you? A lucky one.

how do you feel about chilly weather? Previously answered, but I love winter and autumn

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing? Probably stargazing. Which I stand by because you're not getting me on a roof when the sun's up.

perfume/body spray or lotion? I... uh... none?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times? Like, in my mind? Ah, I licked a guy's nipples for so long he asked me if I was enjoying myself, and instead of saying yes like a boss, I got flustered and it killed the mood. Alas.

about how many hours of sleep did you get? ... 6? I think.

do you wear a mask? When I leave the house, yeah.

how do you like your shower water? Flesh-meltingly hot.

is there dishes in your room? Yes, but only because I just finished eating veggies and rice before I started answering this.

what type of music keeps you grounded? Previously answered, but I really do listen to all of it.

do you have a favorite towel? Nah. I have a favorite spatula though.

the last adventure you’ve been on? My spouse and I went on a 14 day road trip before the pandemic hit and I think between the states and Canada we traveled something like 5,490 miles or so.

is there a song you know every word to by heart? Don't Let It Bring You Down by Annie Lennox

what’s your timezone? East Coast

how many times have you changed your url? 0 - and I don't foresee it happening either.

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years? My aforementioned bestie, but also my lil' "brother" who is not really technically my brother, but who has known me since he was 14 and I was 17, and my D&D group has been together for over 10 years now, so that's like 11 or so more people.

a soap bar that smells good? I use cheap liquid soap, sorry ^^;

do you use lip balm? Nope.

did you have any snacks today? Yes, a pear.

how do you take your coffee? Any way I can get it. Black is preferred though.

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site? Discord, maybe I imagine.

what’s your take on spicy foods? I am weak, my family is weak, my ancestors were weak, but I will sniffle and cry and sob the entire time because it's fucking delicious

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it? Sadly, they suffer more alive than dead, so >.>

can you remember what happened yesterday? Well enough I'm not worried about early on set dementia.

favorite holiday film? I was gonna say Die Hard, but then it made me think of The Last Unicorn and so I'mma go with that.

what was the last message you sent? Cheering on family who did early voting.

when did you first try an alcohol beverage? Supervised - 12 Because no one was there to stop me, 15.

can you skip rocks? I can trip over rocks, but that's about as skillful as I get. ^_^

can i tag you in random stuff? Certainly - I cannot promise I'll always know how to reply, but I actually really appreciate being tagged because I miss stuff easily.

[iamumbra195]

random bleach time travel inccorect quotes from an AU I will probably never write (Ichigo becomes soul king post tybw cause yhwach body doesn’t hold up and then time travels to the Turn back the pendulm era for reasons I’m too lazy to explain)

Ichigo joined Squad 6 under Ginrei Kuchiki in this AU

...

Ichigo: *likes sitting in the sun, hates the rain, touch starved but still prickly enough to pretend he doesn’t like it ‘cause he was soul king for three years and barely had any proper human contact for all that time, has weird eyes and other weird traits from his hollow*

Hiyori + Kaien: *spying on him*

Ichigo: *straight hissed at someone who got to close when he was injured*

Hiyori: *ticks something else off on the list of reasons why Ichigo might be a cat in human form*

Yoruichi, the real cat shapeshifter:

...

Love: Isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other people?

Ichigo: Plane tickets?

Shinji: Concert tickets?

Lisa: Prostitution?

Love, holding holding his broken sunglasses: Glasses.

...

Hollowified!Shinji: *Screams*

Hollowified!Hiyori: *Screams louder to assert dominance*

Kisuke, concerned: Should we do something?!

Ichigo, observing: *thinking back to his hollow training and how much the Visored fucked with him for fun*

Ichigo: Nah, I want to see who wins this.

...

Kensei: Dammit, Mashiro!

Mashiro: What?! It wasn’t me!

Kensei: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Shinji!

Shinji: Not me either.

Kensei: Oh...Then who destroyed the entire training ground?

Ichigo + Kaien who thought it would be fun to spar but went a little too far: 

...

Ichigo: *Gently taps table*

Kaien: *Taps back*

Hiyori: What are they doing?

Kisuke: Morse code.

Ichigo: *Aggressively taps table*

Kaien: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-

...

*Lieutenants on a mission*

Kaien: I think we're missing something.

Lisa: Teamwork?

Hiyori: Cohesion?

Ichigo: A general sense of what the fuck we’re doing?

Kaien: ... Where’s Mashiro?

Mashiro: *fighting a bear in a forest three districts away*

Lisa:

Hiyori:

Ichigo: ... Fuck

Kensei: *in Squad 9 barracks* I  S E N S E  A  D I S T U R B A N C E

...

Shinji: Tonight, one of you has betrayed us.

Kisuke: Is it me?

Shinji: No, it’s not you.

Tessai: Is it me?

Shinji: It’s not you either.

Aizen: Is it me, Captain?

Shinji, dying because of Hollowification:

Shinji, mockingly: Is IT mE CaPTaIN?

...

Kyouraku: How did none of you hear what I just said?

Kisuke: I’ve been dissociating for the past two and a half hours.

Ukitake: I got distracted about halfway through.

Lisa: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

...

Ichigo: Can I be frank with you guys?

Kaien: *confused* Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.

Mashiro: Can I still be Mashiro?

Shinji: Shh, let Frank speak.

Ichigo: 

Ichigo: *lunges at Shinji*

...

Ichigo: *trying not to laugh* Tell Kensei about the birds and the bees.

Mashiro: *serious* They're disappearing at an alarming rate

...

Yoruichi: Soifon, keep an eye on Kisuke today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Soifon: Sure, I’d love to see Urahara get punched.

Yoruichi: Try again.

Soifon, sighing: I will stop Urahara from getting punched

...

*The Visored+ Hollowified!Kaien is getting into a car*

Ichigo: *the only one who know how to drive* I’m driving

Mashiro, out of view: Shotgun!

Kaien, turning to face Mashiro: Aww! But you had it on the way here-

Everyone except Mashiro: WOAH-

Mashiro, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*

...

Lisa: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?

Hiyori: *turning to Shinji* How tall are you?

...

Kaien: 

Ichigo:

Kaien: In my defense--

Ichigo: You have no defense you let Byakuya meet Gin

Kaien: but--

Ichigo: Byakuya. The same cocky shit that tries to fight anything that moves fast enough. And Gin. The creepy shit that thought it was a good idea to work with megalomaniac rather than talk to people

Kaien: You don’t have any room to talk about bad communication but in hindsight it wasn’t my greatest idea--

Ichigo: understatement of the century

Kaien: But I was bored and you have to admit it was a little funny

Ichigo: 

Ichigo: *covering his face because the sight of baby Byakuya getting punted into the Kuchiki Koi pond by baby Gin was actually hilarious but he refuses to admit it* I hate you

...

Kensei: I sometimes drink milk straight out of the container

Mashiro: the COW?

Kensei:

...

Kisuke: You have to apologize to Shinji

Hiyori: Fine.

Hiyori: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

...

Kaien: I told Ichigo his ears turn red when he lies

Mashiro: Why?

Kaien: So I can do this

Kaien: Hey, Ichigo! Do you love us?

Ichigo, covering his ears: No.

Mashiro: Aw, Berry-tan

Ichigo: Shut up, seaweed brain!

...

*Shinji and Kisuke sitting in jail together*

Shinji: So who should we call?

Kisuke: I’d call Hiyori, but I feel safer in jail

...

Shinji: Hey, how old are you?

Ichigo: Twenty-four--

Ichigo *remembers that the soul society doesn’t have the same age system*

Ichigo: two hundered

Shinji: 

Shinji, concerned: did you just say--

Ichigo, nervously: TWO HUNDRED

...

Shinji: What do you think Ichigo will do for a distraction?

Kaien: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.

*several building explode due to Getsuga Tensho*

Kaien: ... or he could do that.

...

Kisuke: I know you’re a time traveler, Kurosaki-san

Ichigo: (Play dumb!)

Ichigo: Who's Kurosaki?

Ichigo: (NOT THAT DUMB!!!)

...

Love: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?

Kensei: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-

Mashiro: Smad

Kaien: Ichigo

Ichigo:...

...

Shinji: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?

Kensei: You’re a hazard to society

Hiyori: And a coward. DO TWENTY.

...

Ichigo, babysitting: Violence isn't the answer.

Byakuya: You’re right.

Ichigo: *sighs in relief*

Byakuya, reaching for a brick: Violence is the question.

Ichigo: What?

Byakuya, running to hit Gin on the head with a brick: And the answer is yes.

Ichigo, running after him: NO-

Ginrei, watching the chaos while drinking tea: ... Today’s a beautiful day

...

Kisuke: *Accidentally hits Hiyori in the face*

Kisuke: *Trying to decide between saying 'I’m fucking sorry' and 'Are you okay'*

Kisuke: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

Hiyori, confused: What’s wrong with you?!

Shinji: *wheezing in the background*

...

Ichigo: Can you please be serious for five minutes?

Mashiro: My record is four, but I think I can do it.

...

Kaien: Do you think different paints have different tastes?

Mashiro: They do.

Ichigo: ... Why did you say that with such certainty?

...

Shinji: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.

...

Kisuke: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.

...

Kaien: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

Ichigo: Killed without hesitation.

Kaien: No.

...

Kisuke: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Ichigo: What did you do?

Kisuke: Nobody died.

Ichigo: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

...

Kaien, euphoric from his date with Miyako: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.

Kukaku: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.

...

Aizen, trying to be friends with Ichigo b4 he died: I made tea.

Ichigo: I don’t want tea.

Aizen: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.

Ichigo: Then why are you telling me?

Aizen: It is a conversation starter.

Ichigo: That’s a lousy conversation starter.

Aizen: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.

Ichigo:

Ichigo: *two seconds away from a homicide

...

Mashiro: what is it called when you kill your friend

Ichigo: Amicicide

Kensei: Murder

Mashiro: Homiecide

...

Ichigo: *looks like Kaien and Isshin*

Kaien: *suspicious but has no proof*

Ichigo, lying becuase he doesn’t want to deal with the emotions that come with seeing Isshin again: I’m not a Shiba

Ichigo: *uses Getsuga Tensho*

Kaien, throwing a table: oKAY, I CALL BULLSHIT

...

Ichigo: *having a chill day in Rukongai by himslef

baby Rukia, Renji, and their gang: *chased by a merchant they stole from*

Ichigo: 

Ichigo: *adopts them*

...

Okay, that’s more than enough for one post

Yes, Kaien is hollowfied here because I want him to be, yes, I really like adding animalistic traits to characters I love don’t ask me why

This is so much longer than I planned but it was too fun to stop

[lheewonz]

Wish That I Could ╱╱ 희승 ✧ l.hs

synopsis :: fwb!heeseung x fem!reader aren’t dating, but they want to be

“wish that i could be your lover”

The ambiguous nature of your relationship was unsatisfying.

Lee Heeseung wanted to completely be yours.

warning :: swearing, kissing, implied/referenced nsfw (?), they almost get arrested?

word count :: 3.3k

“What do you want?” Your flat expression met his gleeful one.

“Damn babe, don’t get too excited to see me.” Heeseung and his annoyingly attractive half-smirk were at your apartment door at 3 in the morning. Under one arm he held a white motorcycle helmet with cat ears, under the other was a similar black helmet without ears. “Let’s go for a ride.”

“No. Do you have any idea what time it is? I have school in 6 hours.” Which really meant four hours since you took forever to get ready, and four hours was definitely not enough time to be well rested. You got cranky when you were tired and usually took it out on the boy currently standing in front of you.

Heeseung shrugged, nonchalant as always. “You just need to learn how to manage your time better.”

You level him with a glare. “You’re the reason it takes a whole hour to get breakfast.”

“And I pay for it. Maybe if you didn’t take an hour getting ready.” Heeseung leans forward, raising his eyebrow at you, his tone tinted with a bit of jealousy. “I’m not in your class, who are you putting so much effort in for?”

“No one.” You avoid his eyes. He was right, as he usually was when it came to topics related to you. You made sure to wake up two hours earlier to have enough time to dress nicely for Heeseung, of course. Not that you would ever admit to that. “It’s too early for your shit. I have to sleep, go home.”

He practically shoves the white helmet into your hands, forcing you to hold onto it. “It won’t take too long. I promise.”

“Last time you said that, I missed a majority of the most important lecture in my class.”

He rolls his eyes and waves you off. “C’mon, love. It’ll be fun.” He takes a step forward, reaching out with his free hand to take yours.

Your heart flipped at the pet name and your voice was quieter when you responded, “Don’t call me that.” You were fighting a losing battle.

He smirks again, bringing your hand up to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to the back of it. “You’re wasting more of your sleep time saying no when we both know you’ll give in.”

There’s a beat of silence while the two of you stare at each other before you sigh heavily. You walk over to the couch and grab a pair of long pants from your freshly folded laundry to switch out with your short pajama bottoms, ignoring Heeseung’s appreciative whistle from where he stands in the doorway. You grab the leather jacket Heeseung had gifted you, getting a matching one for himself that he was also wearing, around the same time he had gotten his bike and head back to him. “I hate you.” You say as you slip the helmet on, glaring at him again.

Heeseung only grins and slides your visor down after booping your nose. “No, you don’t.” Heeseung waits for you to shut and lock your apartment door before tugging you towards the stairs. He briefly lets go of your hand to put his own helmet on, he lifts you up into his arms, chuckling at the small scream you let out and starts running down the stairs three at a time.

Your eyes widen at the actions of this complete madman and wind your arms around his neck tightly. “Heeseung. If you fall I will kill you.”

“Carrying pretty girls is my hidden talent, you should know.”

You were thankful the visor hid your blush. “Ah, really? I thought it was getting on my nerves.”

“I’m multi-talented.”

Soon enough the both of you were outside standing in front of Heeseung’s motorcycle. You climb on after him and wrap your arms around his waist. “Where are we going?”

Heeseung shrugs, “Not sure yet.” He slips his gloves on and within the next 3 seconds, he’s pulling out of the parking lot and speeding onto the road.

As Heeseung drives, your grip on his waist tightens and you cling to him, resting your head on his back and sighing. The drive is peaceful. Heeseung rests his hand on top of yours at every red light. You love the short moments with Heeseung where neither of you speaks since you can’t go more than two seconds without playfully bickering. Whether it be while the two of you are kissing, going for a midnight ride, or other silent activities. Those sweet, silent moments with him almost manage to convince you that Heeseung is more than just a friend. Just like you want him to be.

It isn’t long before you reach your destination, an old park that you used to visit when you were in middle school. Surrounding the park was a locked gate. “Are you sure it’s okay to be here?”

Unbeknownst to you, Heeseung glares at the locked gate that was definitely not locked when he had gone there earlier. “Yea, it’s totally fine.” He pulls your helmet off and helps you off the motorcycle, setting your helmet down on the seat and pulling his own off.

You trail behind him with your arms crossed skeptically as he stalks over to the gate and starts to climb it. “What are you doing??”

“I’m gonna unlock the gate.” He hops over the top and turns to you with a smile.

The lock makes a long clanging sound as he fumbles with it, his eyebrows scrunched in concentration and his lips pouting slightly. He looks up at you and catches your stare as the lock finally gives and clicks open. He pulls the gate open with a smirk, “See something you like?”

A hand pulls on one of your arms to tug you closer to him. “No.” You avoid his knowing stare.

“You wound me, my love.” Heeseung pulls you up against him. You shiver as he leans down to whisper in your ear, breath hitting your ear, “No need to lie to me.” A furious blush spread across your cheeks. You stay silent, burying your face in Heeseung’s shirt, and you can feel his chest rumbling as he chuckles at you. “Let’s take a walk, yea?”

It takes a small bit of coaxing for Heeseung to get you to start walking, but when you do start walking it’s peaceful. The two of you walk with your arms intertwined, talking about anything that comes to mind. Heeseung recounts anecdotes about living with his friends Jake and Sunghoon, animatedly telling you about the very recent time Sunghoon almost burned their apartment down while he was sleeping and forgot to wake him in his haste to escape, and Jake eventually put out the fire.

Eventually, the two of you walk around the entire park and come back to the fountain close to the front gate. Heeseung lets go of your arm and hops onto the thin edge of the large fountain.

“Give me your jacket.” You hold your hand out to take it from him.

He rests his jacket on your arm, a slightly worried expression on his face. “Are you cold?”

“No, but I have a feeling you’re going to fall in.” Despite the fact that you seemed to have no faith in him, your precaution and the fact that you care enough about him to want to make sure nothing happens to something special to him almost makes him blush.

“It sounds like you’re gonna push me in.”

“I wouldn’t. I’m not cruel.”

“I’ll be fine.” You grab onto his shirt anyway for your own comfort, though if he actually started to fall you would probably be dragged down with him.

The two of you continue to walk in silence this time, as opposed to earlier. The silence is suffocating and awkward. You can see Heeseung continuously steals glances at you from the corner of your eye and you can tell he wants to say something. You stay silent to give him time to figure it out.

Heeseung’s tone was surprisingly serious when he started talking. “I was thinking. Are you… happy with the way we are?”

“What do you mean? Like our relationship?” You could feel your heart sinking into your stomach.

“Yea... Are you satisfied like this?”

You start to fiddle with the sleeves of his jacket, all of a sudden finding great interest in the grass. “Uhm, I guess… Why?”

“I’m not.”

Your head snaps up to stare at him in silence and he stares back. Your stomach churns almost painfully and you suddenly feel like vomiting. You let go of his shirt and take a step away from him. “You don’t want to be my friend anymore?”

“No! That’s not what I meant, I just-“ He cuts himself off with a yelp when the next step he takes sends him backward into the fountain with a loud splash. You both stare at each other with wide eyes and then you burst into laughter, previous tension disappearing and dropping yourself to the ground while Heeseung grumbles, but smiles a bit at the sight of your laughter.

Your laughter stops abruptly when you think you hear someone shouting in the distance. The both of you look at the angry guard currently running in your direction and then look back at each other. “I thought you said this was legal??” You hissed at him, grabbing his hand to help him out of the fountain.

“I had to climb the fence to open the gate, why did you believe that?” The both of you run back to his motorcycle. You toss him his leather jacket and then put your helmet on.

“HEY! YOU TWO! STOP!” The guard was closing in, but still, a decent amount of space away, his booming voice echoing through the otherwise quiet park.

“Hurry the fuck up! You’re unbelievable, if I get arrested-“

“We’re not getting arrested. Saving damsels in distress is also a talent of mine.” He puts his helmet and jacket on.

“You put me in distress.” You knock your fist against his helmet as you settle down behind.

Heeseung shrugs. “Details aren’t important.” Then the both of you are off, speeding away as the guard finally makes it to where you were just seconds later.

Heeseung makes it back to your apartment in 10 minutes, compared to the 20 minutes it took to get to the park in the first place. “You’re gonna get arrested one day.” You say as you pull off your helmet.

“Not if I have you with me. You’re my lucky charm, love.”

“You’re so… corny.” You can feel your cheeks heat up at his words regardless and you knock your fist against his helmet again at the sight of his smug grin. “If I were that lucky, you wouldn’t have fallen into the fountain.”

Heeseung’s face falls into a grimace when he remembers how uncomfortably wet his clothes were. He pulls his own helmet off, running his hand through his damp hair a few times. “Right, can I shower here?”

“Obviously. You’ll get sick if you stay in those clothes.” Both of you head towards your apartment doors, unlocking the door quickly and heading to the elevator.

Heeseung leans against the wall next to you. “On second thought. Maybe I should get sick, would you take care of me?”

“No.” You both knew that you were lying.

Heeseung plays along, his stupid (hot), smug smile never leaving. “That’s harsh, love. It’s okay. I know you love me.” His smile softens when you hum in response, red spreading across your face. His hand grasps yours and he pulls you to stand in front of him, his hands going to rest on your waist while yours rest on his chest, ignoring your protest at leaning against his wet clothes. His voice is soft as he asks, “Did you have fun?”

Your smile grows and you nod, resting your head on his wet chest. “I don’t know how you always know, but thank you. I had a lot of fun, Hee.” Your arms go to wrap around him, and he responds by doing the same. You briefly think about how you’re going to have to re-dry your clothes, but the thought is banished from your mind when you feel Heeseung lean down and press a kiss to your hairline.

“Part of my saving damsel in distress talent is knowing when they’re in distress. I also woke up to your tweet about doing laundry.” Everyone who knew you knew that when you started doing your laundry of all things, especially at some god awful time like 2 a.m., that you hadn’t left your apartment for fun in more than a couple weeks. “I’m glad you had fun, love.”

His arms tighten around you and it’s peacefully quiet in the slow moving elevator. You close your eyes basking in his presence as he plays with your hair. Near the end of the elevator ride you remember that he had been trying to ask you something. “Hee?”

Heeseung hums in response, looking down at you when you pull back from him. He continues playing in your hair, brushing your strands all across your face, smiling when you scrunch your nose at him, and waiting for you to speak. “At the park, what were you trying to tell me?”

“Oh.” Heeseung’s eyes widen slightly and he opens his mouth to respond but the elevator dings instead. He sighs, then smiles and taps your nose, “I’ll tell you another day.”

He walks you out of the elevator and you raise your brow at him. “If you say so, weirdo.” Heeseung stays pressed against your back as you unlock your door. “Your clothes are in the very last drawer.”

“Aw, I have my own drawer?”

You push him off you, decidedly having had enough of his wet clothes pressing against you. “I have like 4 pairs of your pants.”

He has the decency to look somewhat embarrassed at the implication that he’s left your apartment without his pants on multiple times. “…I’m sure there’s a good reason for that.”

“Yeah, sure.” You give him a doubtful look. “You’re going to shower, change, then get out.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He leans in to quickly kiss your lips before running into your room to avoid getting swatted at.

“I mean it. I’ll kick you out if you try to stay any longer.”

You did not kick him out.

The way Heeseung’s calloused hands gripped your waist was a feeling you could never get tired of. However, your favorite feeling hands down, had to be the way his lips felt against yours. Heeseung kissed you slowly like he was taunting you, forcing you to pace yourself and not be so eager. He kissed you like he was savoring it like he was afraid that it would be the last time he would be allowed to. He kissed you senseless, tongue tracing the seam of your lips, making you forget what you had declared earlier. He left you breathless, gasping for air and gripping his pajama shirt in your fists.

He trails light kisses down your neck and along your jaw careful not to leave marks, knowing you weren’t that fond of them. With your head tilted back, you catch a glimpse of the clock on your bedside table.

[ 5:27 a.m. ]

“Shit.” You reluctantly push Heeseung away, struggling as he somewhat fights against you. “It’s bedtime, go lay in your corner.”

“I can’t sleep next to you?” The fake pout he is sporting is evident to you even without looking at him as you make sure your alarm is on. “You don’t trust me?”

“No. Last time you asked me if trusted you, you made me almost burn down my apartment.”

Heeseung tsks but still settles away from you on the bed. “It’s not my fault you can’t multi task, love.” He sulks against the wall and you giggle quietly as you sneak glances in his direction as you settle down on your side of the bed. “I just want to touch you.”

You fully turn to look at him with a raised eyebrow. He turns back to meet your gaze before clarifying what he meant. “I meant cuddling. There’s time for anything else later.”

“Right... You stay over there and I will sleep.” You close your eyes to Heeseung staring at you.

Except after 15 minutes you still couldn’t sleep and Heeseung was still staring at you. You groan softly, pretending to not want to give in to what Heeseung wants. “Get over here. You stare too hard.”

Heeseung shuffles across the bed before you even finish your sentence, loosely taking you into his arms. “Good night, love.”

“Good night, Hee.”

Heeseung loses track of time as he stares at you while you try to sleep, his gaze soft and loving. A gentle hand comes up to brush the stray hairs from your face without disturbing your peace. He leans in to press a kiss to your forehead before he wraps his arms around you bringing you impossibly closer to him resting your head against his chest and continuing to stare down at you. You shift in your sleep a little, moving your head so he can have a better view of your face.

Heeseung smiles softly and then thinks back to the unofficial date he had taken you on. While he was successful in his attempt to relieve your stress, he was unsuccessful in his attempt to ask you to officially be his. Somehow it was even more nerve wracking than when he had first come to you with your current arrangement nearly six months ago.

You had finally broken up with your shitty boyfriend and started talking to all your friends again. During a party, you, Heeseung, and a couple of other friends had snuck away from the main party with a couple of bottles of alcohol and just sat and talked. At some point, the conversation turned to you and your breakup to which you had answered that you were done with romantic relationships and just wanted to kiss someone every now and then. Weeks later Heeseung couldn’t get the thought of what you said out of his head and eventually gathered up the courage to approach you with the idea to be friends with benefits and you agreed.

At the time Heeseung considered it a win, but since then his feelings for you have grown exponentially and he regrets the way he friend zoned himself. As much as he thinks you like him back, there was still no guarantee you would agree to actually date him since the premise for this had been no romance in the first place. He sighs, settling down to sleep. “Wish I could be your boyfriend.” He mumbles, “I’d treat you so much better than that asshole.”

“Maybe if you ask properly, your wish will come true.” His startled gasp makes you giggle as you crack an eye open.

“How long have you been awake??”

“I never went to sleep. I told you, you stare too hard.” You shake your head to refocus. “That’s not important. You should ask.”

“Ask what?” You deadpan at him. “Oh.” He sits up a little and scratches the back of his neck, a light blush dusting his cheeks, the most awkward you had seen him since you first met him. You prop your head up on his chest with your hands.

Seeing your face clearly in the moonlight helps to ease Heeseung’s nerves just a bit. “Y/n, my love… Will you be my girlfriend?”

Your responding smile is an image Heeseung will never be able to forget. The way you seem to shine even brighter and are able to easily render Heeseung breathless is a talent that only you possess.

Instead of responding verbally, you lean in close and press a gentle, chaste kiss to his lips once, twice, three times, smiling in between each one. The both of you are giggling together, smiling so wide your cheeks hurt. “Is that a yes?”

You kiss him once more and then rest your forehead against his and whisper, “Yes.”

"i could treat you like no other"

a/n :: send help i spent a fuckton of hrs on this and idek why lord help me pls give me feedback!! like and reblog <3

[merrybloomwrites]

You Can Start a Family (Chapter 6)

Summary:

The trio spends a weekend together before parting ways when tour picks back up.

Mitch and Sarah have a special surprise for Y/N.

Previous Chapters: One ; Two ; Three ; Four ; Five

TW for this chapter: More smut!

The group takes a trip away and this is the cottage I based their Aribnb on.

Hope you enjoy!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

For the rest of the week, you only work mornings. Ryan’s mom is still off from work for spring break, and she uses the mornings to catch up on things around the house and other tasks before sending you home around lunchtime so she can have more one-on-one time with her son. You definitely don’t mind. As much as you love the little boy, you’re ecstatic to spend as much time with Mitch and Sarah as possible.

They’re back to spending almost all of their time in the studio. Mitch had written more than you realized, and he got a recording band together to create an album. You stop by each afternoon for a little while to watch, but don’t want to distract or get in the way. You’re so excited for him, knowing how big a deal it is to create a solo record. Any time he starts to second guess himself, you remind him how many people will support him and love his music.

You have dinner at the Rowland’s Thursday night, and the three of you have to constantly remind yourselves that you cannot be obvious about your relationship. You know keeping it a secret is the best option for now. Maybe someday you could let their families in, but it’s way too soon to even consider that.

You try not to feel a twinge of sadness when Mitch and Sarah hold hands or share a small kiss. You won’t lie to yourself; you always looked forward to being in a relationship where you could do that too. You’re grateful to be with them but you realize this is one of those difficulties you guys had mentioned the other night.

After awhile you notice that it’s getting pretty late, so you get up to head home. You had been hoping to maybe get a good night kiss, but the whole family walks you to the door and you settle for a quick hug from everyone. Sarah does sneak in a quick peck to the side of your head during her hug, and that alone raises your mood.

That weekend you don’t get to see Mitch and Sarah, as you had previously agreed to babysit for another family in your building while the parents were away at a wedding.

The next two weeks, everyone is in full swing with their jobs. You’re back to full time nannying, and Mitch’s album is coming together nicely thanks to the long hours at the studio. You still make time for each other, spending one dinner a week at Mitch’s house, and one dinner a week at your apartment.

You all block off the last weekend in April to spend together. It works out wonderfully for everyone, as you only need to work a half day that Friday, and Mitch’s album is already fully recorded and only needs some final touches before it’s totally done.

Earlier that week, Mitch and Sarah surprised you by letting you know they’d rented a small cottage in a quaint town about an hour away. The second you’re done working on Friday you run home to grab your bag and check on the cats, setting out plenty of food and water for the weekend.

You drive back to pick up Mitch and Sarah and they walk out to your car right as you pull up. Mitch walks to the driver’s side and you roll down your window, curious why they didn’t just get in.

“I’m driving, kid,” Mitch says to you.

“What, don’t trust my skills?”

“I just want you to enjoy the scenery on the way.” You can’t help but smile at how thoughtful that is and relinquish all driving responsibility to him. You decide to give Sarah shotgun and hop into the back seat.

You do enjoy the scenery, but more so, you enjoy not having to drive for once. You’ve had to completely rely on yourself for everything for so long that you forgot what it was like to have someone else take over. You make sure to uphold road trip tradition and point out every cow and horse you see during the journey.

After an hour Mitch pulls off the main road onto a long gravel driveway lined by trees. It takes a minute before the cottage comes into view, and you’re immediately in love with how adorable it is.

Mitch opens your door and gives you a hand out of the car like a true gentleman as Sarah unlocks the cottage. You grab your bag and the cooler and head inside. It’s adorably small. There’s one main space that has the living room, kitchen, and a small dining area. There are two doors off the living room, one that leads to the bedroom and the other to the bathroom. In the bedroom is a ladder that goes up to a cozy loft, full of soft cushions, pillows, and blankets. Off of the kitchen is a door that leads out back, and you’re excited when you peek outside and see a hot tub.

Mitch and Sarah watch as you run around exploring, practically bouncing off the walls.

You run up to the two of them and wrap them in a group hug saying, “Thank you so much for planning this!”

“Of course, love,” Sarah replies. “Figured we could all use a weekend away.”

She starts unpacking all the food and you go to help but Mitch grabs you from behind, wrapping his arms around your middle and pulling you close to him. “Nuh-uh, no work for you. Just let us handle it all.” Your smile grows even wider at this.

A few minutes later everything is where it should be, and they lead you outside.

“So, there is another surprise for you,” Sarah says. Your eyes light up as you follow her down another path on the property. The walk takes a couple of minutes, but you soon see what the surprise is, and it takes everything in you not to run ahead immediately.

At the end of the path, you see a fenced in area that contains sheep, goats, and chickens. As a huge animal lover, this is truly a dream come true.

“Can we pet them?” You ask.

“Absolutely. We can even go in with them, and there’s some food over in the barn we can give them,” Sarah answers. You can’t contain your joy anymore and lean to press a kiss to her lips before running to the fence to pet the animals. They join you and you spend the afternoon playing with the animals and exploring the trails in the nearby woods.

Only when you all start to feel hungry do you head back to the cottage. In the kitchen Sarah starts making dinner and you go to assist her when Mitch once again holds you back. He lifts you and sets you on the counter and hands you a glass of wine before he starts to chop vegetables.

You watch and are purely content in that moment. You sit there, taking it all in. You watch the couple who continually take care of you in so many different ways, who know exactly how to make you happy, and for the first time in years, you feel like you can take a deep breath and shut your brain off and simply enjoy life.

That all changes with one phone call.

The music you’re listening to gets cut off when Mitch’s phone begins to ring. He looks at the screen before answering with a “Hey man, what’s up?”

He listens for a second before saying, “Yea, gimme a second and I’ll check.” He pulls the phone away from his ear so he can open another app.

“Who is it?” Sarah asks.

“Harry, he’s checking if we got the final email about tour. Oh, here it is.” He pauses to read the email before putting the phone back to his ear and saying, “Yea we have it. Our flight leaves next Saturday afternoon, so we’ll get in early Sunday.” He pauses again before answering, “Yes we have the hotel info and rehearsal schedule too.”

Your mood immediately drops when you realize they’ll be leaving in a week. Leaving for nearly 3 full months. You knew they were going back on tour, knew it was coming up, but somehow hadn’t realized it would be so soon. You hadn’t let yourself think about the fact that you would have to go so long without seeing them.

You quickly push down your emotions, trying to make sure that neither of them notice your change in mood. It works for a while.

It isn’t until partway through dinner that they realize you’re much quieter than usual. They don’t question you right away but share worried and confused looks with each other.

After everyone is done eating Sarah turns to you and says, “Why don’t you change into a bathing suit and get the hot tub going while we finish in here?” You feel slightly paranoid, like she’s trying to get rid of you, but figure you’re probably just being oversensitive because you’re upset. While you’re doing what she suggests, Mitch and Sarah have a hushed conversation as they clean up dinner.

“Does Y/N seem off to you?” Mitch asks.

“Yea, she was strangely quiet during dinner. I’m a bit worried that something’s wrong.”

“Do we ask her or wait until she brings it up?”

“I guess we can give her some more time and see if she says something. Maybe remind her she can tell us anything, that we’re here for her.”

You walk back into the kitchen, now dressed in your bathing suit and cover up, carrying a stack of towels. Mitch and Sarah both turn to you with soft smiles, and you stop to kiss each of them.

While changing you had decided that you’d make the most of the time you have with them instead of dwelling on how soon they’d be leaving. You were still in a bit of a sad mood but don’t want to ruin the weekend.

You head out the back door and go over to the hot tub, looking at the dials to figure out how to get the bubbles going. Once you turn it on you take off your cover up and slide in the water.  

A few minutes later they join you, just in time to enjoy the beautiful sunset. They sit on either side of you, and you rest your head on Sarah’s shoulder and reach out to hold Mitch’s hand. For awhile it’s quiet, just the sounds of the bubbling water and the birds chirping as they settle in a nearby tree for the night.

“What’s wrong, love?” Sarah questions after a long period of silence. You thought you had been hiding your feelings well, but it seems she knows you better than you thought.

“Nothing’s wrong,” You reply, still trying to keep your sadness a secret.

“Y/N, you can tell us what it is,” Mitch continues.

You pause, taking a deep breath before answering. “I guess I just didn’t realize that you were going to be leaving next week. It kinda caught me off guard. I’m just gonna miss you guys.” You finish speaking and tuck your face more into Sarah’s neck.

Her hand comes up to the side of your head and you immediately feel comforted by her touch. Mitch turns towards you, wrapping his arm around your waist. He looks at Sarah over your head and sees her eyes swimming with tears.

“I’m gonna miss you too, babe. So, so much.” You hear the emotion in Sarah’s voice and lift your head to look at her. When you too notice her tears you pull her to straddle your lap, needing to have her as close as possible. Your arms wrap tightly around her waist as hers wrap around your neck.

It’s her turn to tuck her face in your shoulder, and you feel more than hear when she lets out a sob. One of your hands travels to her head, holding her close. You hadn’t realized that the upcoming separation might be affecting them as much as it was affecting you. For years it had just been the two of them, and you figured they would be okay together. The fact that leaving you behind was hurting them as much as it was you made you realize how important you are to them. It also made you realize you aren’t the only one struggling.

Mitch keeps one hand on your side and moves his other to Sarah’s back, rubbing comforting circles. He places a kiss to your head saying, “I’m really going to miss you too.”

“I’ve gotten so used to being alone, good at it actually. I forgot what it’s like to have people around that I care about. I hate good-byes, even if they are temporary.”

Sarah murmurs into your neck. “What was that?” you ask her.

She lifts her head to look in your eyes and says, “I won’t say goodbye. Because it won’t be goodbye. We’ll never say goodbye to you, only see you soon. Okay?” You blink the tears out of your eyes and whisper okay in response.

She surges forward connecting her lips to yours. This isn’t a kiss that will lead to more, but rather one that is full of emotion. Your lips are crushed together, and you can feel the unspoken words that no one knows how to say.

After a few minutes you break apart and lock eyes for a moment. You turn your head and Mitch leans in, kissing you gently before he does the same to Sarah. The three of you get lost in one another, exchanging kisses, hands roaming over bare skin. The water is the perfect temperature, and the clear sky is filled with more stars than you’ve ever seen before.

You let out a deep breath and a smile spreads on your face. Mitch and Sarah notice and pick up on your change in mood, enjoying this peaceful moment together. It isn’t until a little later when Sarah starts to nod off on your shoulder that you all decide to head inside to go to sleep.

The first to change and fall into bed is Sarah, who is immediately knocked out directly in the middle. You and Mitch share a fond look when you notice and then slide in on either side of her. She shifts to lay her head on your chest and Mitch spoons her from behind, his hand reaching to hold on to yours. He falls asleep quickly, and you stay up for a bit thinking about all the time you’ve spent with the pair over the past months.

You can’t deny how happy they make you, and you definitely can’t deny the feelings you’ve developed. What started as minor crushes has become so much more. You’ve never been in love before, but you imagine this must be what it feels like. You watch them sleep, relishing the moments where Sarah snuggles in closer, or when Mitch unconsciously tightens his grip on your hand.

The next thing you know it’s morning, and you’re waking up to a murmured conversation beside you. You shift until you’ve placed yourself in between the other two, demanding cuddles. It’s a slow start to the day, lazing in bed for a while before Sarah informs you that she made reservations at a nearby spa for you all.

Everyone eats a quick breakfast and gets ready for the day. The spa is absolutely wonderful. It’s been forever since you’ve gotten a massage and it feels heavenly. Next you go to an art studio to do a Paint and Sip, following the instructor to each create a summer beach scene. Everyone tries to sneak peaks of each other’s work but you all keep it a secret until the end.

Painting has never really been your thing, always preferring performing arts over visual arts. At the end of the session, you’re happy to see that is something the three of you share. You all keep your commentary to yourselves, thanking the instructor for a lovely afternoon. Once in the car though, none of you can hold back your laughter at how truly awful all your paintings turned out.

You’re all in a silly mood that continues for the rest of the day. Back at the cottage, bottles of wine are opened and shared while you teach them an absurd card game you and your cousin made up when you were children.

Thirty minutes in Mitch finally gives up, shouting, “I just don’t understand how the 4 and the 3 add up to 11!” You crack up at his outburst, laughing so hard that tears are streaming down your face.

He pouts playfully before walking in the kitchen claiming it’s time to make dinner. The three of you dance around the kitchen while putting toppings on your individual pizza crusts. While they’re baking you treat Mitch and Sarah to a one-woman Broadway review, belting your favorite songs and putting on a full performance. Sarah does join you for ‘Take Me or Leave Me’ from Rent, as Mitch sneakily records the duet.

The timer beeps alerting you that the pizzas are done, and you suddenly ask, “Can we eat in the loft?”

“There’s no furniture in the loft,” Mitch replies very matter-of-factly.

“There’s cushions on the floor.”

“You want to eat on the floor?”

“The floor is superior to furniture.”

There’s a moment of amused silence before Mitch answers, “Sure, kid, whatever you want.”

It’s not exactly easy to get all the food and drinks up to the loft, seeing as it’s a ladder instead of stairs, but you manage. A few minutes in, you move to sit in Mitch’s lap, making yourself very comfortable. “Oh, so you just wanted me to be your furniture?”

“You’re very comfy,” you say before twisting to peck his lips. He wraps one arm around you, and you all continue eating dinner. Once everyone is done eating you pop up to take the plates to the kitchen, happy that it’s an incredibly easy clean up. You open a second bottle of white wine and bring it back to the loft to refill your and Sarah’s glasses, noting that Mitch is still working on his bottle of red.

You plop yourself back in Mitch’s lap, settling in deeper than before, and smirk when you hear him let out a quiet groan in your ear. You look back so he sees your teasing look and he wraps his arms around you. He quickly picks up on your game and decides to play along. He starts by running his fingers up and down your inner thighs, slowly inching higher under your loose shorts. You grind back onto him, and think you’ve gained the upper hand when you feel him lean down to bite at your shoulder in order to hold back another groan.

Sarah slides closer. Your eyes meet hers and you notice the mischievous glint. She slides Mitch’s hair out of the way and begins to kiss and bite at his neck. You think she’s on your side, helping you rile him up, until she quickly moves her hand to slide inside your shorts and rub against your clit. You gasp at the sudden onslaught of pleasure and realize she’s not on anyone’s side. It’s every man for themselves, and she’s just defeated both of you.

She continues to rub circles on your sensitive nub and says, “I want both of you downstairs, on the bed, clothes off.” You shiver at the sensual and commanding tone of her voice and try to do as she says, but both your brain and legs have turned to jelly. Noticing this, she helps you stand, and Mitch goes down the ladder first, keeping a hand on your waist to steady you as you climb down into the bedroom.

You watch for a moment as he takes off his clothes before doing the same. You glance up and see Sarah watching you both from the top of the ladder, and quickly move to sit in the bed as she had instructed. Mitch sits beside you, a grounding hand placed on your thigh, and Sarah comes down into the room. She slowly removes her clothing, and you watch intently, simply amazed by the gorgeous woman in front of you.

Since you and Mitch are seated against the headboard with your legs stretched out, Sarah is able to straddle one leg over each of you. She leans in to kiss Mitch first, and you watch as their tongues move together. It’s an erotic sight, and you go to clench your legs together to relieve some of the tension in your core, but Sarah’s leg in between yours blocks you from doing so.

She notices what you’re trying to do, and switches to start kissing you. Your eyes roll back at the first swipe of her tongue against yours, and she swallows the whines that escape your lips. Your hands immediately find her, one resting on her hip and the other reaching to grab at her breast.

You get lost in the pure bliss of making out with her, and whimper when she pulls away. You try to chase her mouth with yours, but she places her finger on your lips to stop you. In an almost unconscious gesture, you open your mouth to suck on her finger. She and Mitch groan in unison, not expecting that move from you, and you feel Sarah rub against your thigh.

She regains her composure and says, “Y/N, I want you to sit on Mitch’s face while I ride him. Does that sound good to everyone?”

You immediately nod your head yes. You’re no longer nervous about trying something new, purely excited at the thought of all three of you feeling pleasure at the same time. You do need some help maneuvering into position, but soon you’re hovering over Mitch’s mouth facing Sarah. You feel his hands on your thighs, encouraging you to sit down on his face, but you hold back until you see Sarah sink down on his cock.

You watch as they come together and then you lean in to kiss the milky skin of Sarah’s throat. Mitch groans beneath you and pulls harder, so you go where he leads you. At the first swipe of his tongue on your center you cry out and your hands go to Sarah’s legs to steady yourself.

She pulls your face up and you make eye contact before you’re too overwhelmed to even keep your eyes open. You feel her pull you in for a sloppy kiss and let her tongue take control of your mouth. You follow her as she moves up and down over Mitch, and his mouth quickly brings you to immense pleasure as your orgasm crashes over you. You pant into Sarah’s mouth and both of their hands roam your body as you ride the waves of your high.

You move off to the side, oversensitive and needing a moment to collect yourself. You take a few deep breaths before swiping your thumb through the wetness left on Mitch’s face and using that finger to circle Sarah’s clit. After another minute you get to once again watch her fall apart so beautifully, her sounds of pleasure music to your years.

She pulls off of Mitch and lays on your other side. You run your hands along her torso, easing her down from her high. After a minute, Mitch moves to pull you on top of him. You’re straddling his still hard cock, and you understand what he’s asking. A new wave of arousal rushes through your body at the thought and you move to line yourself up over him before Sarah pushes you back.

You look at her, confused and nervous that maybe you overstepped somehow, but Mitch seems to understand why she made you pause. He leans over the side of the bed, and you’re almost thrown off him with how quickly he moves. You watch as he grabs something from his bag on the floor and immediately understand what the delay is about.

Once the condom is in place, Mitch is moving you back into position over him. You slowly sink down on his cock, feeling as he once again stretches you out. Maybe it’s due to the position, or the fact that you’re still so pliant from your first orgasm, but there’s no discomfort at all this time, only pure bliss.

Once you are flush to him, you lean forward to capture his mouth with yours and move your hips in a way that feels natural. It doesn’t take long for that familiar tingle to build in your stomach, and you know Mitch is already close. He grips your hips, taking over thrusting into you until you’re both cumming together.

You both breathe deeply as you recover from such intense satisfaction. You’ve never felt anything like the two back-to-back orgasms you just experienced, and you’re overwhelmed by the feeling. You lay with Mitch still inside you for a minute, enjoying the feeling of being full, and of being so close to him. You know it’s not just a physical moment of intimacy that you’re sharing, but an emotional one as well.

They seem to pick up on your desire in that moment, and both spend a few minutes running their hands soothingly on your back until you’re ready to pull off of him. Once you do, you immediately latch on to Sarah, who wraps her arms around you and continues to rub your back while quietly telling you how well you did, how proud they are of you.

This time you’re so out of it that don’t even notice Mitch leave, just that he’s back a minute later with a damp cloth to clean up both you and Sarah. You sigh at his gentle touch and sink further into Sarah’s embrace. He once again grabs some clothes and tosses them on the bed, but you ignore them, choosing instead to just climb under the covers. They follow your lead and do the same, cuddling you from either side. You fall asleep to the feeling of their caresses on your skin and the sound of their praises in your ears.

The next morning you wake up to the feeling of two naked bodies wrapped around yours, and it only takes seconds for your brain to conjure up memories of the night before. You feel content, happy, loved.

You relax into the feeling of Mitch and Sarah against you. It’s another slow morning, you all exchange lazy kisses and gentle caresses until you finally leave the bed.

After breakfast you go back to the field with the animals, spending time playing with them before you need to head back to pack up and check out.

You all clean up and load the car. Sarah announces she’ll be driving to the next location, and you’re excited to see what they have in store for the day. You start laughing when she pulls into the parking lot for minigolf, but it ends up being a fun outing. You feel nostalgic throughout, remembering the times you used to do this activity on vacations with your family.

The next stop is horseback riding, something you haven’t done in years. You connect with your horse, Stardust, and love the whole trail ride, especially when you’re all allowed to move at a trot and you can feel the rush of the wind in your hair.

You then stop at a market nearby for some snacks before making the drive back home. Mitch takes over driving again and you fall asleep shortly after beginning the journey, exhausted from the weekend. They drive to your apartment, Mitch once again carrying you inside while you remain sleeping.

He places you in your bed, and your cats immediately join, cuddling up beside you. Mitch and Sarah are both disappointed that their spots next to you have been taken but smile when you subconsciously reach out to rest your hands on your pets. They can hear the cats purring from across the room and it’s easy for them to see the deep connection you all have. It brings them peace to know that you'll have companions even when they're not there.

It doesn’t take long for you to wake up and you find Mitch and Sarah sitting on your couch. Obviously you immediately lay down across their laps and make yourself comfortable. For awhile you all just relax, absently watching the movie they put on.

Once it ends you sit up and ask if they need a ride home. You don’t want them to leave but know that it’s inevitable, and it is getting late in the day.

“My dad will come pick us up in a little while,” Mitch answers. You nod and hold on to each of their hands, enjoying the last few moments of uninterrupted quality time. Once Mitch’s receives a text that his dad is on the way you realize there’s only a few minutes left. You lean to Sarah to share a passionate kiss before turning to share the same with Mitch. You need that closeness before you can let them leave.

“We’ll plan another night together before we leave for tour, alright love?” Sarah says. You nod and pull them both into another hug. You let go when Mitch’s phone buzzes again. You know his dad is there and the weekend is about to end. You press one more firm kiss to each of their lips before they pick up their bags and head out the door.

For a moment you just stand there in your quiet apartment, at a loss now that you’re alone. It only takes a minute before your cats are demanding attention and you’re grateful for their distraction. You do your normal Sunday night routine, setting out anything you’d need for work that week and taking a shower before getting into bed.

*****

On Tuesday night you go to the Rowland’s house for dinner. It’s the last one you’ll all have together before tour starts and you’re determined to enjoy it. You leave Ryan’s house at 5:00 and immediately go across the street to spend as much time with the family as possible.

Dinner is a group effort, and you’re tasked with making the salad. Chopping the vegetables is calming to you and you get lost in the rhythm of it. Once dinner is ready you all sit around the dining room table. You can tell you’re not the only one sad that Mitch and Sarah will be leaving soon. Mitch’s parents are definitely clinging to him more than they have over the past weeks.

You stay later than you normally would on a weeknight, wanting to spend as much time with them as possible. Mark and Tammy head up to bed, but still you hang around. You’re on the couch with Mitch and Sarah when they pull out an envelope and hand it to you.

“What is this?” you ask, a confused expression on your face.

“It’s a surprise. Open it!” Sarah replies. You glance at both of them and see how excited they look.

You immediately open the envelope and read through the pages inside. There’s plane tickets, hotel and transportation details, passes to shows.

“What is this?” you ask again, unable to make sense of what you’re seeing.

“You’re going to be joining us for two weeks of Love on Tour,” Mitch answers.

“No way!”

“Yes way! Sarah beams.

“How is this possible? What about work?”

“We already talked to Ryan’s parents. His mom finishes her school year on June 9 and doesn’t start summer school for a couple weeks so she’s giving you some time off. Your flight leaves on the 9th so you’ll be able to come for Slane Castle and Wembly and the following week of shows.”

“This is unbelievable. I don’t know what to say. Thank you so much!” You turn and give each of them a quick kiss, unable to control the smile on your face.

“We couldn’t go 3 months without you,” Mitch says, “and we knew you’d enjoy coming to the shows, so it just made sense.”

“This is truly the best surprise ever! Oh my gosh I’m so excited! I’ll get to meet everyone! Harry and Elin and oh my goodness-” you cut yourself off, once again speechless at the opportunity you’ve been given.

Mitch and Sarah watch you like parents on Christmas morning, elated at the pure joy they’ve given you. They start to tell you all about their plans for your time together in Europe and you grow more and more excited.

After a while you decide it really is time to get home and reluctantly say goodnight. You’re able to share kisses with them at the door, and drive home with a new sense of joy knowing that you’ll only have to go a few weeks without seeing Mitch and Sarah as opposed to three months.

You see them every day that week, even if it’s just for a little while. They stay with you Friday night, the plan being that Mitch’s parents will pick them up to have lunch with them before taking them to the airport Saturday afternoon.

It’s a laid back night, the three of you just wanting to spend time together. You order food and play movies in the background while talking about anything and everything you can think of. You head to your bed and spend time exploring each other’s bodies, connecting repeatedly in such a physical and visceral way that leaves you feeling closer to them than ever.

You refuse to open your eyes Saturday morning, knowing that you’ll soon have to say good-bye to them. You try not to let your emotions get the best of you, but you know you’ve failed when you feel Sarah wipe away the tears that have escaped your eyes.

All too soon Mitch gets a text that his parents are on the way to pick them up. You don’t even try anymore, letting your tears fall freely as you clutch on to both of them as tightly as possible. They rub your back and place kisses on your head until you’ve calmed down enough to even out your breathing.

You hear Mitch’s phone buzz again and know that it’s time for them to leave. You choke back a sob and turn to kiss Mitch through your tears.

“We’ll see you in a couple of weeks, okay baby?” he says. “We’ll call, and Facetime as much as we possibly can.” He holds you tightly for another moment before allowing Sarah to pull you to her.

You’re both sniffling as you cling to one another. “We’ll see you soon love,” she whispers into your ear. All you can do is nod, too choked up to speak. You kiss her, then Mitch, hug each of them one more time, and then lock the door behind them as they leave.

You stand there for a moment, unsure of what to do next. You truly don’t know how long you remain immobile, only moving once your cat rubs against your legs. You sit on the floor petting him as tears stream down your face. Finally, you take a deep breath, get off the floor, and start your normal weekend routine.

It’s a rough few weeks without Mitch and Sarah, but you’ve spent plenty of time alone before and fall back into that mindset. You keep as busy as possible, and love sending them updates about your day or getting to Facetime with them. You watch as many livestreams of shows as you can, focusing on Mitch and Sarah whenever they’re on screen.

You also continue to visit Mark and Tammy, having dinner with them at least once a week. You realize they’ve kind of adopted you at that point and this thought brings you a sense of comfort. You also get to see old videos and pictures of Mitch and learn all about him as a little kid which brings you joy.

Sometimes you visit them with Ryan, knowing how much Tammy loves to be around the little one. What you don’t realize is that she takes videos of you two and sends them to Mitch and Sarah.

Before you know it, it’s Thursday, June 8. All you have is one day of work, a long flight and a couple hour drive, and you’ll be reunited with Mitch and Sarah. You cannot wait.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------A/N: Thank you so much for reading! If there's any specific scenarios you'd like to see with this dynamic, let me know! Next chapter will see Y/N reuniting with Mitch and Sarah at Love on Tour and finally meeting Harry!

Taglist: @akkatz @pandeebearstyles @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @theekyliepage @numafarawayglxy @booberry019-blog @hillzrry @ssareidbby

Comment if you'd like to be added to the taglist!

[morrigan-sims]

1, 3, 24, 33 :D

Hi Lush!!! Thank youu for asking!! 💖💖💖

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

My real answer is my own boys Rook and Carrion, but if I'm not allowed to answer with my own OCs, then it's Caleb Widogast (really all of the Mighty Nein, but Caleb is my most beloved boy), literally anyone from Black Sails (they're all awful, and I love them all) but especially Silver, Flint, Anne, and Max; Kaz Brekker, Nikolai Lantsov, Viktor arcane (and Jinx a bit), the Doctor (esp. the 10th Doctor), Percy Jackson, LOCKE LAMORA the og idiot-genius bastard man, and Ballister Blackheart + Nimona. This is a long list, but I have over 280 books in my bedroom, and also get too attached to fictional characters.

3. do you leave the window open at night?

When I'm at school, yes, because my building was built in the 1930s and is heated by awful radiators that spit out literally 85 degree air, so keeping your windows open is essential unless you want to die of heatstroke at night. In all three years I've lived in this dorm building (different rooms, but same building) the only time I've ever closed my window from the day I moved in til the day I moved out was over winter break between semesters bc I'm gone for a month and they do room checks and mandate that we close them. Yes, it was open even when it was literally 7 degrees Farenheit last February. At home at my mom's or dad's I do not, partly bc those houses have functional AC and heat, and also partly because I have had a very very very strong somewhat irrational fear of my cats falling out a window. (I say somewhat bc it did actually happen one time. But I had that fear for years even before that. Don't worry, he only fell like 2 feet and ran up onto the porch and came back inside the second we opened the door. But truly one of the scariest experiences of my life.)

24. if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

You and me? Absolutely discussing critical role and dnd, and bg3 and P:WotR. I'd like to imagine we're doing it while stargazing, too. I've always wanted to stargaze on a roof.

33. the last adventure you’ve been on?

If you count driving a 2001 volkswagon beetle that is set up for someone 6 inches shorter than you and the seat is stuck so you can't move it to go get tested for strep throat and covid, then I did that a couple hours ago. If you want an actually FUN adventure, idk. I don't go many places. Maybe going to the renaissance festival with @goldenwaves over Labor Day weekend? Since then I've basically just been stuck on campus doing school, but that was genuinely one of the best experiences of my life. (I've always wanted to go to a ren faire, so this was perfect. The idea came up at 2am on a Saturday, and by Sunday afternoon, I had bought plane tickets.)

[radical-sky]

15 questions 15 mutuals

Thank you for the tags @sluttyhenley @blueisglueredisdead @starrybouquet @oddcologne !!

1: are you named after anyone?

Yes and no! A middle name is after one of my great x4 grandmothers. I have her Bible, but I don’t use it. It is incredibly delicate.

2: when was the last time you cried?

When I fell off my horse on awhile back and got a concussion. It wasn’t a “damn that hurt” cry, it was because I was so incredibly frustrated and pissed off at myself that I went off and got injured enough I couldn’t even drive. I still have no memory of what happened.

3: do you have kids?

Nope! Not yet.

4: what sports do you play/have played?

I played most common American sports in elementary/middle school, but only stuck with horse riding after high school.

5: do you use sarcasm?

Yes sirreeee.

6: what's the first thing you notice about people?

Probably physical appearance and characteristics? I can describe someone for a long time after a short meeting, but I won’t remember their name. Also very weirdly, if I see the car they arrive in I’ll remember the license plate for at least a few hours.

7: what’s your eye color?

Green!!

8: scary movies or happy endings?

Definitely happy endings.

9: any talents?

I can back a semitrailer around a blind curve and hit the driveway on the first two or three tries?? Idk what’s the difference between a talent and something you’ve done so many times you’re just good at it??

10: where were you born?

In a hospital near the town that’s near the road in the state where I live.

11: what are your hobbies?

Writing, reading, horse riding, I listen to a lot of podcasts and music, knife/axe throwing, welding. I’m always learning/doing something new.

12: do you have any pets?

Yes. I have a dog, a few horses, and enough cats I’m probably considered a crazy cat lady.

13: how tall are you?

5’8

14: favorite subject in school?

Anything that meant I could be outside and physically doing something and not sitting at a desk.

15: dream job?

The job I’m doing now!

Tagging: @valmare @gothidecorem @mongoosesthings @agentfaust @mavnix @doodledrawreblogs @thethistlegirl and anyone else who wants to, no pressure!

[starkstruck27]

I headcanon that today (June 14th, but I might not get it posted by midnight because time management is not my strong suit lol) is Steve's birthday, and we just had a book signing at the bookstore I work at tonight, so I was inspired to write this. It's modern day, and slightly aged up characters, but not by much. Enjoy!

Steve couldn't believe his luck. It was his birthday, and it seemed like everything was going just right today. First, he woke up before his alarm and actually felt energized, then Robin had promised to take him out wherever he wanted to go later on (even volunteering to drive so she could show off her new license and car), then his favorite coffee place gave him a discount and a free pastry since it was his birthday, and to cap it all off, he had gotten back a test from one of his most difficult classes, and he'd passed it with flying colors. All in all, it was a good day. But then, he saw a sign outside the campus bookstore, and it went from good to great.

The sign was advertising a book signing with a local author, who just so happened to be Steve's favorite author of all time. The guy's name was Ronnie Fitconi, a mysterious man who never had his picture in any of his books. He didn't write much about himself in the little "about the author" section of his books either, the only things he said was that he was 23, just a year younger than Steve was, he lived somewhere in Indianapolis, he preferred tea over coffee, he loved the beach, he was a cat person, and he was gay (which was pretty apparent from the books he wrote, but whatever).

The book that he was promoting with the signing was his fourth, pretty impressive for a guy so young, but Tik Tok had managed to make him blow up practically overnight. That and how secretive the guy was. Seriously, if you looked the guy up on Google, it was like he didn't even exist. There were no pictures of him, and no record of him except that he was a writer that blew up after his first book was released three years ago. This was the first book signing he had ever done, and it was only to the local college bookstore and a few others in the area, but all were small, and none were at big chain stores, only locally owned.

As soon as Steve saw the sign, he took a picture of it, then immediately called Robin as he rushed back to his car.

"Dingus!" She answered, her smile evident in her voice, "Happy Birthday! What's up, buttercup?"

"Hi, Robbie. Thanks for that. But also, you know how you said you'd take me to do anything I wanted tonight for my birthday?" He asked, practically vibrating out of his skin.

"Yeah. Did you finally decide what you want to do?" She asked.

"Yes, and I know it's probably not going to be the rip-roaring time you were planning, but just hear me out, okay?" He said, "How would you like to come with me to meet Ronnie Fitconi?"

"That author you like?" She asked, "Yeah, of course! I told you, anything you want to do, I'm down. So, what's the plan? Are we breaking into his house?"

"What? No! You are seriously so weird. He's doing a book signing at the campus bookstore, I was gonna bring my books and buy his new one and then I get to meet him and get his autograph! No breaking and entering required."

"Well, that's a lot less fun, but I'll be there. What time does it start?" Robin asked.

"6:30 tonight," Steve replied.

"Let's get there at 6:00, we don't want to have to wait forever, so it'd probably be better to get there early."

"Good thinking. In the meantime, we have a couple of hours, and my classes just ended for the day. Will you meet me for dinner and help me pick out what to wear so I don't look like a total idiot?" Steve asked, already heading towards his dorm.

"Of course. I'll bring tacos. I'll be there in ten."

With that, Robin hung up the phone, and Steve drove off towards his place. As soon as he got there, he went to his desk to get his copies of Ronnie's first three books. Steve would probably never admit to liking them as much as he did to anyone but Robin, because the guy wrote only romance novels, but he really did love them. He didn't read much, and when Ronnie's debut novel came out, he didn't have much interest in that, either. But then he read the second book when it came out, and he was hooked. He read the third one when it came out and only got further hooked, and finally he buckled and read the first one, too. He hadn't expected to like it, but he found that he couldn't put it down, and now that another one was coming out, he couldn't wait to read it, too.

The first book the guy had written was called "Kings of the Lost World", and it was a dystopian sci-fi romance. It was about a young man who thought he was king of all he saw, but just as he's settling into the position, the apocalypse hits. The king gets taken down a peg, having to team up with the same guy who had been in his position before, but got kicked off his throne before the new king had taken over, but now, they have to learn to lean on each other to survive. They have a rocky start at first, but eventually, it turns out that they fall in love, and they manage to find a place where they are safe and get to live out the rest of their lives in happiness. Steve honestly didn't think he'd like the book, since he typically hated both sci-fi and dystopian, but he ended up loving the book when he finally read it. It almost reminded him of when he was in high school, when Billy Hargrove came and kicked him off his throne for good, all except for the romance bit.

The second book the guy had published and the one that had gotten Steve hooked on the guy's writing was probably his saddest one, called "Blood of the Innocent". It was a noir thriller set in the 1920s, about a gay man who sang in speakeasies as a drag queen who got accused of murdering a bunch of young men that went to the clubs he sang at. The detective in the story, who was closeted himself, fell in love with the guy while trying to clear his name and solve the case, but after they'd started their affair, they were found out. This book didn't end up as happily as the first, with the two of them being able to run away together, rather they were both killed for their relationship and the original case was mostly forgotten about and covered up, only to go cold and remain unsolved. When Steve read it, he could not put it down, and when he got to the ending, he would be lying if he said he hadn't flat-out bawled over it. He had finished it around two in the morning one night, and Robin was not exactly happy about having to wake up to his call at that time to listen to him rant to her about it, but she read the book later at his insistence, and she soon forgave him once she got to the end.

The third book the guys wrote was called "Don't Fence Me In", and was a cute, sweet, rom-com kind of book about two young men who worked together on a horse ranch. The one man had lived there his whole life and who's father owned the place, but was getting too old to run it, so they hired a farmhand. That's where the other man came in, a handsome guy from out of town who had just been looking for work anywhere, and who the first guy thought was much too prissy and posh for the kind of manual labor that was expected of him. He had come from the city and was the son of a rich businesswoman, so why he wanted to run from that cushy lifestyle just to work on a rinky-dink ranch, the first guy didn't know, but he teased him about it relentlessly. But where he expected the guy to get offended and ditch his position, the other guy just took it lightly and met it with laughter, until they became friends, and eventually, even more than that. At the end of the book, the first guy's father, who, once he found out about the relationship supported it 100%, gave up ownership of the ranch to his son and his boyfriend, and the two were married on their land with the help of a fat check from the second guy's mother, who also supported them completely. Steve had gushed so hard over the book that when he was reading it, he found himself lying on his stomach with his legs kicked up and a permanent smile on his face as he twirled his hair. It was probably his favorite of all three books.

And now, as he held each book in his hands and placed them in his favorite tote bag to take with him to the signing event, he couldn't help but wonder what the next book might be about. That was another reason he loved this author so much, he always kept you guessing on what he might do next. Most authors picked one or two genres and stuck to them, but this guy was all over the place. And yet, everything he wrote was absolutely amazing, and had Steve captivated within a few pages. He could not wait to see where things would go this time.

After a few minutes of thinking about it, he heard a knock on his door, and he knew Robin was there. He went to let her in and immediately, the two of them set up the tacos on his desk and ate while Steve threw practically every piece of clothing he owned around his room, trying to find the perfect outfit. There was still an hour and a half before they had to be at the bookstore, but Steve refused to leave the apartment until he knew he looked perfect.

"Seriously, is it really that big a deal? I mean, you're gonna see him for like, five minutes. If that. You don't have to be in a tux or anything for that," Robin said as Steve continued to fret over whether he should wear his blue sweater or his green button-down as if the fate of the world depended on it.

"Yes, Robin, it is that big a deal! I don't want to look like an idiot! I'm already gonna look like a creep because of how much I love his books, and if I blank on him and say something stupid or can't speak at all, I want to at least look my best so he can't gossip about that to people, too!" Steve said, finally deciding on the sweater, but then having a whole new meltdown over which pants would go best with it.

"Okay, point taken, but also, you're selling yourself short. I'm sure he won't think you're an idiot, and he'll probably be flattered that you like his books so much. I mean, he wrote them for people to read and enjoy, right? And if you freeze up, I'll be right there with you to bring you out of it, so you really don't have anything to worry about. And go with the brown pants, the gray ones don't look right." She said, finally deciding to be helpful.

"Okay, I guess you're right. Now, which shoes should I go with? Dress shoes would probably be too formal, right?" He asked, holding his selections up to himself in the mirror.

"Yeah, just wear your converse or vans. We might still get stuck in line since this guy is so popular, so you should wear something comfortable. And wear your white dress shirt under your sweater so that the collar and cuffs stick out. It'll give you that cute academia look with your glasses and make it less weird to think of you as a bookworm." Robin said, helping him pick out the final few things and then leaving to give him privacy as he changed. Not that he needed it, they've both changed in front of each other countless times, but still. She also had a surprise for him, and she needed an excuse to count her cash without him seeing.

Finally, he was finished, and after he was finally satisfied with his hair, they put the leftover tacos in the fridge and Steve grabbed his books. They hopped in Robin's car, and got to the bookstore right at 6:00, ready to go inside with the others already on their way. The bookstore employees were apparently already checking people in, so Steve was anxious to get in there and get a good spot in line, but before he could jump out of the car (and his skin), Robin grabbed his arm.

"Wait, you're missing a few final things," she said, rummaging around in her little backpack that had the little video game character Kirby all over it.

"What?" Steve asked, his heart beating hard enough already. What could he have forgotten? Was his breath bad after the tacos? Did he have something on his face or in his teeth? Had his hair gone flat?

"One, a breath mint, just in case," she said, opening her pack of Altoids and giving him one. "Two, your inhaler, also just in case. We don't need you hyperventilating in front of your hero. Three, some lip gloss, just like back in our scoops days to really complete the look and make you just that much cuter."

She handed him a tube of her favorite lip gloss, strawberry banana flavored, the same kind she used to lend him way back when that made his lips pink and full. He slathered on a layer and handed it back to her, then popped the breath mint and slipped his inhaler into his pants pocket, fixing his hair and taking one last deep breath before turning to her and smiling nervously.

"You think I have everything?" He asked.

"Almost," she said, "You still need one more thing."

With that, she reached into her bag again and pulled out her wallet, handing him forty dollars in cash with a big smile on her face. Steve stared at the money, dumbfounded, trying to hand it back on instinct.

"No, keep it. You need it if you want to get his new book. Besides, it's your birthday present. You don't get to argue, I'm paying for it. Now let's get inside before they sell out!" Robin said, smiling widely at Steve's confused spluttering.

"Robin, you don't have to pay for me. Thank you, but you really don't-"

"Shut up your face, Dingus! I want to. Besides, like I said, it's your birthday present. Now, let's go, for real. We don't want to be the last ones in line, do we?"

Finally, Steve relented, climbing out of the car and meeting Robin at the front of it to give her the tightest hug he could muster before they walked in. They may be strictly platonic, but Steve loved her more than he ever loved anyone before, and he had to make sure she knew that.

Finally, they walked into the bookstore, where they were greeted by an overly chipper employee who already looked tired, and the event hadn't even started yet.

"Hi! Are you guys here for the book signing?" She asked, her customer service smile and attitude something the two of them were all too familiar with.

"Yeah, we are," Robin said, grinning widely at her.

"Great! Do you have your tickets already or do you need to purchase a copy of the book now?" the employee asked, covering her mouth against a yawn.

"No, we need to buy a copy," Steve said, holding tightly on his tote bag straps.

"Okay, that's perfectly fine. Just go on up to the front registers, Gigi will be there to help you out, and then just keep your receipt and you can jump in line. Have fun!" The employee smiled, then greeted the next people that came in behind them.

Steve and Robin went to the counter and did as instructed, asking the girl there for a copy of the book and paying for it before getting in line and waiting for it to start moving. As they did, Steve was practically on pins and needles, and Robin took the opportunity to examine the cover of the new book. It was called "Court of Royal Rivalries", and the pun was evident when you saw the cover. It was two boys playing basketball, one a brunet in a green and white jersey and the other a blond with not shirt on, just green shorts.

"Hey Dingus, can I see your book for a second?" Robin asked, and Steve handed it over.

"Sure, why?" He asked.

"I just want to read the back and see what it's about," Robin said, flipping it over.

"Ooh, read it out loud, I want to know, too." Steve encouraged, and Robin began to read.

"Seth Haner is the king of his high school, with everything his heart would desire. He's got money, he's got looks, he's got charm, and most of all, he's got his peers groveling at his feet for even a scrap of his attention. But after having been dumped by his girlfriend Natalie seemingly out of nowhere, he realizes that what he really wants, a love that will last, is the one thing he doesn't have. Enter Ben Holden, a new student transferring into the sleepy rural town from California. Suddenly, Ben is the hottest commodity in the school, easily dethroning Seth and taking over his court. Seth can't stand the guy, and is dreading it when he finds out that they'll be playing basketball together, the one things Seth has left after losing practically everything. Ben is a monster on the court, and Seth feels like he's losing basketball, too, when the coach tells them to work out their differences or they'll both be nixed from the team. Can Seth and Ben put aside their differences to find their similarities? Or will the blood of the two kings be spilled as they fight for the crown on the court?"

Steve stared at her as she finished reading the blurb, his jaw hanging open as she finished.

"Okay," he said, debating whether or not he needed to use his inhaler, "Either this is one hell of a coincidence or... Well, no, that has to be it! That's so fucking weird."

"I know! I mean, that's like your high school career in a nutshell. And look at the cover! I'm willing to bet my life that the brunet one is Seth and the blond is Ben, because this is too fucking uncanny. That is the creepiest shit ever. It's like a glitch in the matrix or something!" Robin agreed, handing the book back to Steve.

"Wait a second, hang on, I want to see something," he said, pulling out the other three books from his bag as the line began to move. He flipped them each open to the title pages, and Robin watched as he found what he was looking for.

"Okay, wait, look at this," he said, showing her the first one, "This book is dedicated to his sister, apparently, who 'taught him what it was like to live through the end of the world'. Then this one," he opened the second book to the same page, "This one is dedicated to his mom, who 'kept him safe until things got hard and then left him to the wolves'. And this one," he opened the third one, "is dedicated to his father, who 'should have supported him like Mr. Montgomery supported River'. So I wonder..." Steve said, then opened up the fourth book, and his heart nearly stopped when he read the dedication.

"What does it say?!" Robin insisted. They were only a few people away from meeting the guy, but Steve felt like he knew him already, and it only raised more questions that he couldn't figure out the answers to as he handed the book to Robin to read for herself.

The dedication read, "To my Pretty Boy. You know who you are. This is the way I wish our story ended up. I'm sorry."

Robin finished reading it and her eyes went wide as she looked up at Steve, the both of them utterly baffled. This was just impossible. Neither of them could believe it, and neither of them knew what to say. They were both trying to come up with some way to explain it, but before they could, another bookstore employee, a man about their age with dark hair down to his shoulders, ushered them through the backdrop screens that were set up to keep the interactions private and told them to have fun.

Steve and Robin didn't know if it was more or less confusing when they stepped up to the table and saw none other than Billy Hargrove sitting in front of them, a sharpie in his hand and his blond hair tied up into a knot on top of his head. He had a slight beard now and more tattoos now than back in high school, in fact, he had a whole sleeve on one arm and a few standalone ones on his other arm. He was wearing a short sleeve button up, but unlike back in school, all the buttons were done up, except for the top two, exposing the pendant he still wore and just a sliver of his still golden skin. His eyes were still the same sparkling blue, but they were partially hidden behind a pair of round brown glasses. He still wore his dagger earring, but he had a few more piercings up around the shell of his ear and a stud in his nose now, too. Overall, he looked fantastic, he took Steve's breath away, but he was still completely floored that he was sitting there in front of them.

"Hi, how are yo-" Billy said, finally looking up at them and seeming to choke on the words, literally. He began to cough as his face went red, and the manager of the bookstore ran to get him a bottle of water while another employee, the dark haired man, came over to make sure everything was okay.

"Yeah, yeah, everything's fine, thanks," Billy said, waving the man off, "Just wasn't expecting to see any familiar faces today."

The manager finally returned with the water, and Billy drank it, and once he caught his breath, he finally seemed to get himself collected. At least, collected enough to turn on his charm and start acting like he hadn't just choked at the sight of two blasts from his past.

"Well well well, Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley. I never expected to see you two around here. How've you been?" He asked, motioning for Steve's books and readying his sharpie.

"Um, fine, I guess?" Robin said, "Wow, sorry, it's just a trip seeing you here. I honestly thought you were dead or something."

"Aw, I wish!" Billy joked, smiling as Steve finally handed him the books and he began to scribble in them. "But no, seriously, it's a trip to see you guys, too. I never expected to see anyone from Hawkins ever again once I moved out here. I'm not surprised you thought I was dead, I tried to bury my old self. That's why I don't let anyone take pictures and why I write under a pen name. I didn't want to be found."

"Jesus, what, are you on the run?" Robin asked, Steve still speechless beside her.

"No, just living happily by myself for once and not wanting anyone to find out and ruin it for me. I guess you guys know, but the fact that you're here means you're fans, so I don't think I need to worry too much about you posting my yearbook pictures all over Twitter as long as I ask you really nicely." He grinned, and Steve nearly lost his breath all over again.

"Well, Stevie's more of a fan than I am. It's his birthday today, so I told him we could do whatever he wants tonight and since he loves your books we ended up here, but either way, my lips are sealed." Robin said, finally stepping back and pushing Steve forward to make him interact with the other guy.

"Y-yeah, no, I wouldn't tell anyone. I mean, after all you've gone through to make sure no one knows who you really are. Like, I couldn't even find you when I googled your name, and you can find anyone on google." Steve rambled, hoping that Billy couldn't hear his heart beating practically out of his chest.

"I appreciate that," Billy said, his smile big and bright on his face. "So, how've you been, Stevie? I hear you're a huge fan. What did you think of the last one?"

"I-I loved it. 'Fence' is probably my favorite of them, but I love all your books. You're a really talented writer, I never would've thought- Wait, no, that came out wrong! Jeez, I hope I didn't offend you, I just meant that you always seemed more street smart than book smart- shit, I didn't mean that either, I just meant- Oh, hell," Steve stammered, his face going as red as Robin's t-shirt, "This is coming out all wrong, I didn't mean that, I hope I didn't just piss you off, because I really do like your books and I'm just nervous cuz it's you and you're like, the last person I expected to see here signing them. I'm so sorry!"

"Hey, calm down, Stevie Boy. It's fine, I get it. No need to be sorry for anything. And anyway, I'm the one who choked when I first saw you," Billy chuckled, finally finishing writing in the last book and capping his sharpie before he handed them back to Steve to put in his bag. "I'm glad I got to see you guys again. I think I needed some familiarity. It was starting to get a little lonely being a ghost. Hopefully I'll see you again sometime soon."

And with that, he stood up, gave them each a quick hug, and then motioned for the dark haired man to bring in the next group. Steve and Robin left through another set of screens and to the door, the both of them seemingly in a daze until they got to Robin's car.

"Well, that was... certainly something," Robin said, staring straight ahead, just like Steve, both of them still trying to wrap their heads around it.

"You can say that again. I mean, Billy fucking Hargrove? I never would've guessed in a million years." Steve said, his eyes still wide.

"Neither would I." Robin agreed.

"And to make matters worse, he was so fucking hot! Like, that was not fair for the universe to make me look like such an imbecile in from of him!" Steve ranted.

"Okay, it really wasn't that bad, you were just star-struck, I'm sure he gets that all the time. And besides, he looked happy to see us, especially you," Robin replied, then she seemed to remember something, perking up and turning to look at him. "Wait, what did he write in your books? He wrote for a long time, it couldn't have just been his signature."

Steve nodded his agreement and took the books back out of his tote, starting with the first one and flipping it open to the page that Billy had written on.

"What does it say?" Robin asked, trying to lean over to see, but she couldn't read the cursive Billy wrote in.

"It says, 'Pretty Boy, since you're a fan and you already know, here's some more tidbits you might not have guessed about...(1/4)' then his signature." Steve opened the second book, and read on, "This one says, 'First off, my pseudonym is a joke. I always liked the name Ronnie, and Fitconi is an anagram of the word 'Fiction', because it's a fake name. Clever, huh? (2/4)'. Then his signature again." He flipped open the third book, his heart pounding in his ears as he read, "This one says, 'Secondly, and probably most importantly, all my books-'"

Steve cut himself off as his heart got caught in his throat, but he swallowed as he started over, "'Secondly, and probably most importantly, all my books are about you and me, and the way I wish they'd been for us. (3/4)', and his signature again."

"Holy shit!" Robin said, practically lunging at him as she begged him to read the last one.

"And finally, this one says, 'Lastly, I'd like to see you again. Maybe I can elaborate what I mean by all this, because I really want to. Enjoy this book, and even if you don't let me know your thoughts. Don't be giving this out to people, but-'"

Steve cut himself off again and slammed the book's cover shut, his face flushing even worse than before as he hid his face in his hands.

"What?! What did it say?!" Robin demanded, her hands waving around as she got more excited.

"He gave me his fucking number!" Steve practically screamed, pulling his hands away from his face as he looked at her with a weird smile. "Then he wrote happy birthday and signed his name again! Fuck, I don't know whether to scream or to go back in there and kiss him right on the fucking mouth! This is fucking Twilight Zone levels of insanity and I don't know whether to be happy or terrified!"

"Let's go with happy for right now, he wants to see you again! And all his books are about you! That's so cool! And he wants to see you again! This is definitely a win! I think you should call him tomorrow." Robin said, trying to hype Steve up.

"I don't know..." he said, picking at his sweater sleeve, "What if I make a fool of myself again? I wouldn't even know what to talk about with him. I'd just look dumb."

"I highly doubt he would think so. He practically lit up like a light bulb when he saw you!" Robin said.

"He choked on air when he saw me." Steve deadpanned.

"Yeah, but after that, he lit up! And he told you that his books, which are all romances, are about you! Seriously, you should call him. At least once you finish the book, that way if you don't talk about anything else, you can talk about that!" Robin argued, and Steve reluctantly agreed.

He was finished with the book by that time the next day. He loved it, every word, and he knew from the beginning that it was about him, but it was honestly both weird and heart melting to read his own life (albeit with a different outcome) written down on paper. He remembered the dedication in the book, how Billy said that the happy ending he wrote for Seth and Ben was how he wished things had gone for them back in high school, and finally, Steve buckled.

He called Billy.

[bumblebeerror]

It’s been on my mind today but I need you to know.

Hitting 25 has been one of the best things to ever happen to me.

I don’t say this lightly - I lost my father who I loved dearly at age 18, I grew up a bit above the poverty line and now only *just* live above it. I’ve been treated for severe mental illness and learning disabilities since I was a child, starting at 6 years old. I have a physical disability and chronic pain. I have had some bad fuckin times, I’ve been through my share, and I’ll go through more I’m sure.

But I can tell you I feel so much better mentally at age 25, unable to stand for more than an hour or so without severe pain, on a consistent schedule of prescribed pain pills, discovering just how hard I was masking some pretty serious autism, struggling with my ADHD meds being less effective, and only leaving the house three total times a week because I’m immunocompromised than I was at age 13 when “all my problems were school”.

Because at age 10, nobody close to me had ever died before. At age 11, I had never lived in a new place before. At age 12, I had never felt so cold and empty and tired. I’d never endured my peers teasing me for crying about a death in my family. At age 13 I had never felt like I wanted to die before then, like the world was on fire, like it was ending. At age 14 I hadn’t known what it felt like to have period cramps so bad my mother sent me to school with a muscle relaxer and still had to pick me up by lunch, to have this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that being a girl was a lie and I was a liar. At age 15 I’d never had people remind me so viciously that I wasn’t like them, I’d never felt so throughly upset by the idea of one more person calling me she. At age 16 I’d never had my heart broken before, I’d never dealt with a friend turning on me completely. At age 17, I’d never had my family feel so broken. At age 18, I’d been petrified of the idea of my father dying, and he did. At age 19, I’d never actually thought about how I would kill myself before. At 20, I’d never gotten drunk before. At 21, I’d never gone inside a bar.

You get the picture.

Your teen years suck because you’ve never done so much shit, and on top of the terrifying experience of doing it all for the first time, you also have all your peers picking at you for doing it wrong the first time. Your teen years suck because they are chaotic and new and stressful and you don’t know how to handle them yet. You’re not supposed to know yet.

Hitting 25 was the realization that I wasn’t going to just up and die, that now I have to actually plan. I have to do taxes, and that I actually know how to. That I have to care for my pets and I know how to. That I have to drive to work and do my job and I know how to.

25 was what made me realize that I had things I was supposed to be around for. People and pets who relied on me, who loved me and needed me and wanted me.

That I can have a panic attack and know that I’m having one. That something can piss me off and I know I can take a moment before I respond. The awareness that I do not have to do everything for the first time all the time anymore, that I know stuff, that I’ve been around the block and can use those tools is INVALUABLE. The fact that I can look at my intrusive thoughts and, if I truly wanted to, CHOOSE to indulge them? That I can sit here and be the cat that doesn’t wish to go to the vet and the concerned cat owner?

It changes everything.

It was the realization that I am the one punishing myself. That I can and should respect myself as a person because it means I can respect more deeply the care that other people have for me. It sounds so stupid when I explain it but it’s absolutely a whole different ball game.

The fact that I think the only thing that could severely tank my mental health is if I were to become homeless in winter or actively abused or something similar should speak volumes to you what I mean when I say that not having to do everything for the first time all the time is a huge mental weight off you.

I promise. It will feel better when you are 25. I promise that even if it isn’t fixed, it will be easier. And if I’m wrong when you hit 25, you can come yell at me about it. Probably I’ll still be here.

[shining-m00nlight]

Broken Face and Broken Soul

Ned/Cat week 2024 Day 2: Hide the Body

Ned gets a call. He ends up at his brother’s girlfriend’s apartment late at night wishing to be anywhere but there. How did he get pulled into his brother’s mess again?

Please read ALL the tags for warnings!

It was 10pm at night when Ned Stark's phone rang. He looked at his screen and groaned. It was his brother. Ned really didn't want to pick up his phone. I would probably end in him driving across town to get his drunk brother of some dirty bar floor. The thought of staying in bed was much nicer. But after he let the phone ring two more times, Ned picked up anyway.

“What do you want, Brandon?” he asked, annoyed.

“Ned?”  

Ned sat up straight in his bed immediately. It was not his brother's voice coming through the phone but that of his girlfriend’s, Catelyn Tully. Catelyn had been his brother's girlfriend for three years now but Ned had only met her 6 months ago because he had been away at the Vale, so their paths never crossed before.

"Catelyn? Is everything ok? Is somebody hurt? Is it Brandon? Is that why you have his phone?” For a while there was only silence on the other side of the phone.

"Catelyn!?" 

“I … I don't. Brandon is … fine? Can you just come please? We … he needs you! Please?"

Ned got up, grabbing his clothes. 

“I'm on my way! Where are you?”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ned stood in front of Catelyn's apartment half an hour later. He had never been here before. The apartment buildings around him had appeared to be a mace of never ending houses that looked like they might come down on him any second. 

Luckily Catelyn had given him an accurate description on how to find her place. The main entrance had been open when he arrived due to a faulty lock. Before he could lift his hand to knock on her door the door opened just enough that half a head with a mess of red curls and one tear filled red eye could appear in the gap.

“Oh good you made it! Did you bring your phone?” she asked. Her voice sounded raw as if she was suffering from a bad cough.

“No, you told me not to,” Ned answered.

She smiled sadly: “Good, thank you for coming. And I am so sorry for this.”

“What are you sorry for? Are you ok? What is happening?” Ned was feeling more confused by the second.

Catelyn bid her lip. “I will show you but you have to know if I show you, there is no going back.”

Ned made his decision in that second:

 “Show me”

Catelyn stepped out of the way to let the door swing open so Ned was able to enter the flat. He quickly scanned the state of the room. It was clear that the door led directly into the living room of the little flat, a living room that was a total wreck. 

A lot of the stuff was laying around in the middle of the room as if they had been thrown through the room. Broken pieces of what Ned thought might have been a vase mixed with water on the floor. But the worst thing was the living room table. Or what was left of it. It had been made out of glass but the only thing that made the shattered glass identifiable as a table was the placement in the room in front of the couch. 

What was left of the table was covered in a red liquid that made Ned's stomach turn. He hoped that it was not blood but judging by Catelyn's panic and the trail the liquid that led through the room to another door, it appeared that hope was probably for naught. 

For a second Ned thought about his brother and how he hadn’t heard a word of him yet, but just in that moment Brandon came out of the door the blood led. His hands were blood red and the skin was broken, all of his clothes seem to be covered in blood as well but he was way too steady on his feet for the blood on the floor belonging to him. 

“You called my brother?”  Brandons eyes went from Ned to Cat.

“We needed help! You were the one insisting on not calling the police!” Catelyn whisper yelled back at his brother. 

For the first time since entering the flat Ned turned around to the woman who had called him here in the first place and for the first time he was able to see her whole. And what he saw made him furious. The reason Catelyn had only shown half her face when opening the door earlier was now shining on her face as clear as day. Half her face was bruised and her lip was split open which made her overall stressed appearance even worse.

“What happened to her face?” 

He turned back to his brother. He wanted to ask her but he knew that he was not able to contain his anger and yelling at her right now would have been the wrong choice. 

“Nothing, it was just a bit of a misunderstanding.” Brandon answered but avoided his brother's eyes. 

“A misunderstanding, that leaves half her face black and blue? What did you do Brandon?” 

“Why do you think I did something? Maybe~~”

“If it wasn’t something you did, you would have given me an actual answer and not this bullshit about misunderstandings!”

“Well if you're so sure. Why don’t you ask her? And also ask her what she did!”

“Brandon, I already told you. I didn’t do anything and you are an asshole to accuse me like that!”

“Oh I’m an asshole? How would you have felt coming into my flat and finding me with another girl?”

“Well for once I wouldn’t have flung you across the room into a wall!”

“You did what?!” Ned was jumping in again. 

“How could you do something like that Brandon! Have you lost your whole goddamn mind?!”

“Did you listen to what I said?! She was making out with the little perv of a foster brother!” Brandon yelled back at Ned pointing accusingly towards Catelyn, who finished despite the fact that Brandon stood multiple feet away from her. 

For a moment Ned was thrown for a loop so much that he almost missed Catelyn whispered: “That’s not true” from behind him.

He didn’t know Catelyn that well and he had only heard of her former foster brother but he really couldn’t imagine Catelyn cheating on Brandon and even less Catelyn cheating on Brandon with Petyr Baelish. Ned caught himself pretty quickly though.

“Even if she did it. How dare you put your hands on a woman in violence!”

“I didn’t put my hands on her in violence. It was just a bit of an accident”

Ned chose his next words very carefully, looked Brandon in the eye and in a low tone said:

“Mother wouldn’t be able to look at you.”   

Those words seem to go through Brandon's body like a shockwave and with a few quick steps he was right in front of Ned's face. Ned braced himself for a punch. When Catelyn lifted up her voice again, this time much stronger than the last. 

“Stop it Brandon! Stop it, both of you! This is not helping anyone! We need to concentrate on the problem that is right in front of us!”

For what felt like the hundredth time this evening Ned was confused. How was Catelyns face looking like she stumbled into an MMA fight, not the problem right in front of them. 

Ned looked around the room again, processing what he was seeing and what he heard tonight until he finally realized that he still didn’t know who the blood belonged to and that the third party involved in this mess that his brother mentioned, Petyr Bealish, didn’t seem to be around.

“Where is Petyr Bealish?” Ned asked slowly into a now completely quiet room.

Neither Brandon nor Catelyn said a word, but Catelyn lifted up her arm and pointed towards the door his brother had appeared from earlier. Ned walked through the door into the room behind it, he immediately wanted to turn around again. 

The room he was in was the bathroom and in the bathtub was the pale lifeless body of Petyr Bealish. Blood was still gathering under the body collecting in the bathtub which appeared to be plugged to not let the liquid go down the drain. By now, Ned guessed that his face probably didn’t have much more color than Bealishes but he took a few deep breaths and walked the last steps towards the man in the tub. 

Ned bent down and put his fingers on the throat to feel for a pulse or any other sígn of life. But there was nothing. This was a dead person. His brother had just left a room containing a dead person and apparently no proper authorities had been involved. 

When Ned left the bathroom again Catelyn was sitting on the floor still close to the door and Brandon had placed himself on the couch staring at the mess before his feet. Ned himself didn’t feel like standing either and he let himself sink down onto the floor. 

“How did all of this happen?” he asked and hoped that he might finally receive the full story. 

And he did. Told by Catelyn her eyes fixed on the bathroom door.

Apparently Petyr had asked Catelyn if he could stay with her for the night. He had told her he had to come to town spontaneously and hadn’t had time to find a hotel to stay in. Catelyn, the kind person she was, had seen no problem with letting him crash on her couch. But she also had plans with Brandon that day she didn’t want to cancel. 

When Catelyn got to the next part she became really quiet as if she was ashamed of her words. Ned's blood boiled at the realization that this shame was most likely Brandons fault for the way he reacted. 

Catelyn wanted to leave her flat because Brandon was scheduled to appear any minute but when she tried to leave Petyr had stopped her, talked about how much he loved her and then forced himself on her. 

It had been a blessing and a curse for Catelyns when Brandon came into the flat, not wanting to wait outside for too long. He was able to get Petyr away from her, who by then had tried to get his hand under Catelyn's shirt, by pulling him away. 

But then he had turned to Catelyn and accused her of cheating on him. She had turned away from him, hurt that he put the blame of the situation on her. This action had apparently enraged his brother so much that he pulled on her arm to turn her towards him. 

To Catelyn’s shock Brandon had used so much force that pulling on her arm had caused her to stumble right into the corner of the wall, causing the bruises on her face. 

While Catelyn was clearly mad at Brandon, she still labeled it an accident. Ned had another name for it but he didn’t want to interrupt Catelyn or tell her how to feel.

When Petyr had seen Brandons action he jumped in, ironically trying to protect Catelyn from Brandon's violence. It had turned into an all out fight between the two. Brandon being the taller, older and stronger of the two had an easy time defeating the other man. 

The fight had ended when Bradnon had pushed Bealish into Catelyn's glass table head first. One of the legs of the table had apparently pierced Bealishes skull making him bleed quickly and a lot. By the time Brandon and Catelyn had realized what had happened the life had completely left Bealish and with half his brain on the floor it had been clear that there was no coming back. 

Catelyn had wanted to call an ambulance anyway but Brandon stopped her and took her phone away. He had been sure that no one would believe that it had been an accident so he did not want any authorities near this mess. 

Ned silently agreed. If he arrived at a scene with a battered woman and a dead man present and the third party in the room was clearly responsible for both, he wouldn’t believe in an accident either. 

Brandon had decided to put the body in the bathtub where the blood would be easier to clean, as if there weren't already a few liters of it in the carpet. While Brandon had been busy moving the body, Cat had grabbed his phone. She hadn’t been able to unlock it to call her Uncle like she had planned but she had been able to access Brandons emergency contacts and found his name in them. 

Ned wondered why she hadn’t called the police or an ambulance with Brandon's phone but she probably also worried about his brother going to prison. That is how they ended up here. 

When Catelyn had finished her retelling of the last few hours Brandon seemed to wake up out of his trance and asked: “So brother, as Cat seems to think you are the hero we need in this situation. What do we do now?” 

Ned could only look at his brother in righteous indignation, how dare his brother both mock and demand a solution for him after assaulting his girlfriend and killing a man. 

“I have no idea, Brandon. But since you thought calling an ambulance was unnecessary, shouldn't you have an idea!”

“Well believe it or not I am not in the business of getting rid of bodies, brother dearest”

“Don’t you dare act like this now! Not after the things you did tonight!”

"The things I did? I defended my girlfriend against a little perv!”

“After you assaulted her!” Ned yelled louder than he had the whole day. 

Suddenly Catelyn jumped up from her spot by the door. 

“Shh, both of you. Are you crazy yelling at each other in the middle of the night in a house full of people. Discussing who did what will not help us right now. Ned? I am so sorry that I pulled you into this. I shouldn't even have called. I was just panicking and I didn’t know what to do. But you can still leave. No one knows you were ever here.”

Ned looked at her and a wave of protectiveness came over him.

“I am not letting you here alone with two men who assaulted you tonight, Catelyn. I’m in this now and we will find a solution.”

Brandon made a sound that clearly showed his disagreement with Ned's words but he probably realized that it was better for him if he didn’t voice it.

“I might know something. I still think that we should call my Uncle. I know he has some contacts to people one might call sketchy but I would trust no one more than him to help with this.” Catelyn told Ned. 

“Great! Let’s call the old guy then. Why haven't you done this before?” Brandon voiced his agreement from the couch.

“Because you have my phone” Catelyn hissed at her boyfriend.

Brandon had at least enough decency to look embarrassed, under his breath he mumbled, oh right, and handed the phone to Catelyn. 

Catelyn grabbed her phone quickly and while turning around she had already started to dial the numbers. She walked towards the last door that was unknown to Ned, he guessed it must be her bedroom, and entered it. In the second before the door closed Ned could hear her saying her Uncle's name with such a relief in her voice he had never heard before.

While Catelyn had talked to her Uncle, his brother had tried to start a conversation with Ned, trying to justify what he did to his girlfriend again, but Ned hadn’t been interested in listening. He couldn’t even truly look at his brother. He might have believed that his brother was sorry for what he did to Catelyn if he hadn’t tried to minimize it over and over again. 

No his brother didn’t think of Catelyn or Petyr and what he had done to them, not that Ned felt much sympathy for the dead man either, but his brother was just concerned with making himself look better. He did not sound like a person that regretted having actively hurt his girlfriend and having killed a man. No, Ned didn’t believe his brother was truly sorry. 

After Ned repeatedly stopped his brother's attempts at talking, Catelyn stepped out of her room again.

“Uncle Brynden said he and some people are on their way here. He said he will take care of everything under some conditions. One, Brandon you will leave right now, you will leave all of the clothes you're wearing right now, I have some spare ones for you. Two, you will never contact me or any of my family members again. And third..”

“What!” Brandon interrupted her: 

“Did you agree with your Uncle's demands? What about us? Cat, you know I love you!”

She looked at him colder than Ned had ever seen her face.

“Us? What about us? Us was over the moment my face hit the wall while you accused me of cheating on you with my foster brother. And you don’t love me Brandon cause you don’t hurt the people you love”

Brandon started to say something again but Ned stopped him and encouraged Catelyn to finish what she was saying before. Catelyn took a deep breath.

“Third, you will spend the next two years aboard. You will have two weeks to find a way and a reason for it or my Uncle will find one for you. If you can find one yourself it does not matter what reason you find, from traveling or a college education, my Uncle doesn’t care. But you should know that the one my Uncle will find if forced to will probably be less pleasant. My Uncle said this is a take it or leave it deal. If you are gone by the time he comes he will see it as you accepting. If you are still here when he comes or go against his conditions afterwards he will make sure that you will be put in front of the appropriate authorities.” 

Catelyn had delivered the speech with no emotion in her voice like she was delivering the safety instruction in an airplane. For the first time this evening Brandon looked truly devastated. 

“Is this what you truly want, Cat?” he asked her.

“This is the choice you get Brandon. I’m sorry but we all have to live with the consequences of tonight and you still have the chance to choose which ones you want. But you have to choose now.” she said and at the same time lifted up a pack of clothes towards Brandon, that Ned only noticed now. 

She knew, he realized. She knew just as he did that Brandon would choose to leave. She knew that Brandon would rather leave than face the court system, rather leave than deal with the true consequences of having killed someone and having assaulted his girlfriend. 

As expected Brandon grabbed the clothes his now ex-girlfriend had offered him and walked into Catelyn's bedroom, apparently not wanting to change next to the men he killed.

Catelyn stood completely still not moving an inch as they waited for Brandon to return. Ned didn’t dare to speak. 

When Brandon came back and said his goodbyes, he leaned forward to give Catelyn what appeared to be a kiss on the cheek but she flinched away when he came near her. 

Brandon mumbled a quick apology and left. Making Ned wonder if he apologized for the kiss or everything before and if his brother had ever offered her a sincere apology for hurting her. 

Ned looked at Catelyn for a long time then: 

“Do you want me to leave as well?” 

He had thought about leaving but he didn’t want her to be alone until her Uncle arrived.

“If you want to leave, you can.” Her voice slowly lost her steadiness as she talked.

“I will be fi~~” she wasn’t able to finish her sentence before she broke down in tears. 

Violent sobs shook her whole body and she would have collapsed on the floor if Ned hadn’t caught her. She cried and cried. Her tears would stop. Ned awkwardly tried to sooth her by giving her encouraging words. As that didn’t seem to walk he carefully tried to to put his arms around her in a more comforting way than the way they had been when he caught her. 

He hoped he wasn’t doing the wrong thing. He didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable by another man touching her after what happened today. But when he carefully started to stroke her back to hopefully calm her down she practically threw her arms around him and sunk deeper into his embrace. After a while of standing there Ned arms became quite heavy from having to hold her on her feet.

“Catelyn, maybe you wanna sit down for a bit?”

“Yes, that might be a good idea, But I can’t sit on that couch, I just can’t. Please!” Catelyn's voice became panicked.

“Ok, ok. Don’t worry. How about I’ll sit you down on your bed. Is it ok if I take you there?” Ned asked while continuously trying to sound soothingly.

Catelyn nodded but didn’t move an inch. Ned noticed that she probably wasn’t able to move. He asked her for permission to lift her up and she again just nodded. Slowly to not startle her he grabbed her under her arms and legs and lifted her up in his arms to bring her to her bed. He tried to put her down carefully but she clung to him with a strength he hadn’t expected, so when he tried to stand up straight again he got pulled down by her, falling onto her bed right next to her. 

Both of them stammered out apologies after apologies while their limbs got awkwardly entangled with each other. After some rearging they ended up laying next to each other on the bed and Cat let out the smallest giggle.

“I’m sorry.” she told him again. 

“I really didn’t want to pull you into this and now I’m even making you babysit me because I am a wreck”

“Everything is fine. This was not your doing. It was my brother's fault. And I am truly sorry for what happened to you tonight. Neither of them had the right to hurt you. I hope you know that.”

“I do. At least I think I do. But why would they do this? Why?”

“I don’t know. I can’t explain it. I’m sorry Catelyn.”

Catelyn turned her head towards him.

“You know, after tonight I think you should really call me Cat. All my friends do.”

“Are we friends?” Ned asked.

“Yes, I don’t just let anyone into my bed” Catlyn tried to make a joke.

Ned tried to smile for her sake but couldn't quite manage it. So instead he asked her, when she thought her Uncle would arrive.

“He should be here in about half an hour. And I should actually start packing up some things, I obviously can’t stay here but I don’t know if I can get up again already.” she signed.

“Don’t worry about that. I will help you if you would allow. How about you stay here on the bed and relax and tell me what I should pack for you and where to find it.” Ned suggested.

Catleyn agreed to the suggestion and soon after Ned was walking around the flat trying to find her things in the places she had instructed him to look for them. When he was finished he carefully placed the bag he packed next to her on the bed.

“Here you go my Lady, your bag is ready to be transported.” he told her, now it was his turn trying to get the heaviness out of the room. 

He thought it worked, at least a bit since she gave him a small but true smile. But with a look at the time she had realized that her Uncle would be arriving any minute. She told him that he should better leave now. She wasn’t sure how her Uncle would react to Ned still being around after what his brother did.

She brought him to the door of her flat to give him her goodbye.

“Again, thank you so much for coming, Ned. And thank you so much for staying and comforting me. It really wasn’t your responsibility but you are a good man Ned. I hope you know that. Maybe we will see each other again some time. But for now goodbye, Ned.” she said. Carefully placing a kiss on his cheek and slowly closing the door.

Ned, completely stunned, touched the cheek she had just kissed and whispered towards the closed door: 

“Goodbye Cat.”