#i do have one friend who has been lovely and accommodating with the diet i have to be on
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it sucks that so much of my family has also dealt with cancer but it's really lovely that they were able to give me warnings about things
#a friend of mine just had a computer glitch and lost a bunch of work and i said it sucked and i'm sorry and asked if he could email his prof#and he's i think just really upset about it as i would be too bc that does suck so bad#but i don't have the energy to commiserate. i feel like a steaming pile of shit right now. i only got home 30 minutes ago from the hospital#and i have to go back tomorrow and then spend the rest of the day probably feeling like this while also having to go to another appointment#bc i need to get my earrings changed out so i can take them out for my body scan#and then going home with earl and setting up. and finally getting a bday gift to my friend as well and dropping that off#i feel increasingly gross and sick rn and this was just one injection#but my relatives were like 'listen. no one in your life is going to get this unless they've had cancer. and it sucks but that's how it is'#and i'm just very glad i got that heads up because i'm getting a lot of love and support from relatives now#esp the ones who also dealt with cancer#but it's just been radio silence from friends. and i get it i get they have their own lives and might not know what to say#but it does still hurt a little#i do have one friend who has been lovely and accommodating with the diet i have to be on#but my other best friend is just. i think with his school he has his own friends and his own life but. yeah. it just hurts a little#maybe i'm being irrational idk. something to discuss with my therapist today at our appointment#not everything is about me etc etc#this is the same friend who lost his work that i mentioned in the tags#cancer tw
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Happy 801 day to those who celebrate! Iâm honoring this day by talking about one of the most amazing, memorable BL manga Iâve read this year.
Sleeping Dead by Asada Nemui is a deeply unsettling, melancholy, sometimes almost cozy and sometimes quite brutal horror BL story about science, zombies, trauma and obsession. It is thoroughly laced with black humor, and also manages to pose some tough questions about ethics and how far weâre willing to go in order to live, to survive. A French manga book club described the story as âwhat if Mary Shelley had been a fujoshiâ and that is not too far off either.
Content warnings for the story include gore, torture, cannibalism(?), rape, dismemberment, suicide.
Full text under the cut, includes spoilers.
Sada is a well-liked high school teacher who gets brutally killed when heâs out at night, making sure his students are not loitering out too late. His body is picked up by the âmad scientistâ Mamiya, who has devoted his life to researching resurrecting the dead. To him, Sada seems like the perfect test subject in more ways than one.
When Sada wakes up, he finds himself tied to a laboratory bed in an unknown location, his life altered forever. He is now a zombie-like living dead, whose body is resistant to injury but can only survive on a strict diet of human meat. Whatâs even worse, Mamiya subjects him to torturous scientific experiments day after day. When he tries to escape, it only makes it clearer how trapped he really is in this situation. For a long time, the only friend and companion Sada has is a living dead laboratory monkey whom he hangs out with and names Monkichi.
Little by little, Sada is able to win back some autonomy and gain more equal footing with Mamiya, shifting the power balance in their relationship. As they live together in their own secluded world, cook for each other or hunt for the next victim for Sadaâs human meat smoothies, they slowly start to build a mutual understanding, even affection. And as we learn more about their pasts and motivations, it becomes even easier to understand why the characters act the way they do.
Asada Nemui is known for their unique, often quite dark BL stories. Sleeping Dead is definitely no exception, giving its own twist to the genre we know and love. It is definitely a BL story through and through, but the way it approaches romance, sex and relationships is pretty exceptional and thoughtful. Mamiya, who was raped by his bullies in high school, is deeply traumatized and his understanding of sex and relationship is very skewed.
This means that Sada and Mamiya start navigating sex and intimacy in a situation where one of them doesnât even want to be touched. Even later on, Mamiya can only ever have sex while fully clothed. Mamiyaâs trauma is treated as something deep and real that canât be easily healed or dismissed, and I appreciate that. In romantic fiction of almost any kind, penetrative sex is often seen as the end goal or the only ârealâ sex, but that type of attitude is not present in this story at all.
Sada is able to accommodate and understand Mamiyaâs needs in a way that feels very touching. Even though Sada has a lot more experience in sex with men, he also confesses that he prefers after-sex cuddling to actual sex. He also prefers friendships to romance and doesnât actively need to have a romantic partner, even if he understands that the society around him gives more value to romantic and familial bonds rather than friendships.
It feels like Sada and Mamiya are both outcasts in their own way: Mamiya visibly strange and ostracized by his peers, willingly withdrawing from the world around him, while Sada looks at the rules and conventions of society from an outsider pov while trying to live in it, enjoys being alone while understanding the benefits of human connection but also feeling like heâs different from others. With each other, Sada and Mamiya are able to carve out their own rules when it comes to sex and romance, just like they do with their whole existence on the outskirts of society.
Even with all the affectionate and domestic parts, Sleeping Dead is also very much a horror story. Since we are dealing with zombies, murder and eating humans, there are some gory bits, but the art does not dwell on the gore that much. There are many other levels and layers to the horror elements throughout the story instead.
At first, there is the quiet, existential horror of Sadaâs new, undead life. He is forcibly brought back to a life he did not ask, made to eat fellow human beings, and can never go back to his old life or meet the people he once knew. There is a profound loneliness that you can see in his every expression and movement, the way he seems to be detached from everything around him, trying to understand why this is happening to him. This existential horror of being doomed to loneliness comes a full circle at the end, for a very chilling effect.
Then there is the horror of pain and torture, of Sada being treated as a test subject, stripped off of his humanity and agency. Just like Monkichi, the monkey that Mamiya has brought back from the dead, Sada is also locked in a lab and treated as an object, rather than a living being with feelings and needs. Through Monkichi and Mamiyaâs various comments, the story explicitly links Sadaâs horrific, inhumane treatment to the horrors of what non-human animals go through in the name of science and food production every day all around the world.
I personally really appreciated how hard Sleeping Dead goes when it comes to morality and ethical questions. When Sada expresses that he doesnât want to eat human meat, Mamiya says that itâs not so different from killing cows or pigs for food, unless Sada was a vegan while he was alive. Sada has to admit that he wasnât. They also ponder about whether it would be better to kill someone whoâs an easy target, like someone living on the streets or an elderly person, or if itâs better to go after violent criminals who cause harm to society. These discussions between Mamiya and Sada give the story an almost philosophical air and make it a very memorable experience.
Even with all the serious topics and horror elements, the manga does not feel too heavy to read, thanks to all the black, deadpan humor that points out how absurd many of the situations the characters find themselves in are.
All in all, Sleeping Dead is a very exeptional story and it stayed with me for a very long time. The ending is especially haunting, especially when you think about how it relates to the title of the story, but talking about it would probably require its own postâŠ. Letâs just say that I could barely get any sleep after finishing the story.
Unfortunately the manga has not been licensed in English yet, but itâs available in French at least.
Japanese version is available wherever jp books are sold, I read it on Ebookjapan.
#asada nemui#sleeping dead#cannot stress how important this story is to me#or how important asada nemui in general is#bl manga#bl talk
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hey i was wondering how would the main 6 react/deal with an mc who can be a half dragon form like this one https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/34480753384518754/
(p.s ever since you popped in my "for you" I've been following your blog and your head canons are very good :) )
The Arcana HCs: M6 with a half dragon MC
~ thanks for the love anon, and here are your headcanons! I'm sorry if it took a while, I work through requests in the order they come in and I'm still figuring out how to do that without getting overwhelmed lol
Enjoy! - brainrot ~
The picture in question:
Julian
The first time he sees you take this form is after you've had a few drinks with him and the wrong person ticks you off
Three different parts of his brain are having three very different responses all at once and he doesn't know which one to listen to
Julian.exe has stopped responding
The drunk part of him doesn't even know what's real anymore, is that actually you?
The doctor part of him is fascinated, how does that work? Why is it coming out now? Why didn't it come out some other time? Is it voluntary?
The third part of his brain, the one that's flustered by you 24/7, is very confused. He knows he's attracted to this, but he has no idea why and he's not sure he's ready to reflect on what that says about him
He will very respectfully request that you do this again, when he is sober, and he can have all his questions answered
Asra
They have a snake familiar, this just confirms your status as Faust's other best friend
His biggest weakness (after you) is new and unconventional things, and it shows
Can you use your wing as a bellows? How much more strength do you gain with that talon arm? Is it strong enough to open the jar of kool-aid pickled garlic they bought the other day and still can't get open?
Very excited to see what magic he can teach you/you can develop using it
If you cast a spell with your wing can you aim it at an object farther away?
The stove salamander adores you
Will ask you to volunteer to try something to double check if it's safe for Faust
"MC, there you are. I made something to help Faust shed her skin but I need you to see if I made it too strong."
This has gone horribly wrong once or twice
Nadia
Oh my
She's not sure exactly what this is, but she's into it
First things first though, what unique circumstances lead to this and how best may she love you with that in mind?
Is it inherited or developed? Did you steal it from a mighty beast after defeating it in battle? What other secrets are you hiding?
Does the skin need any special products? Would you like anything added to your diet?
She's already got a mental sketchbook pulled up in her mind's eye to plan an outfit that would not only accommodate the physical shift but accentuate your striking appearance
She commissions a piece of jewelry to wear on your horn that matches her hair pieces
She will ask if she can kiss the affected side of your face, because she's curious about what it feels like
She would also like to know if you can fly in that form, and if so, if you can take her flying with you and Chandra
Muriel
He's not that shocked, he lives in the woods, he's seen weirder
But having observed wildlife for so long, he is now very intent on observing you too
Your form is dragonlike, do you have reptilian traits? Does it affect your body language? Are you able to speed up and slow down your metabolism and experience of time at will by adjusting your temperature?
He will begin acting on the conclusions he draws. Dragons hoard treasure, so he starts bringing you little gifts to see what you do with them
You received them from him, so you're not going to throw them out
Now there's a growing pile of pretty rocks and leaves and carvings in the hut
But he never sees you act protective of the collection, he knows you smile when you look at it, but aren't you supposed to sleep curled around the thing you consider your treasure?
You don't sleep with your things, you sleep snuggled up to him - oh. Oh.
Portia
She first sees this form come out on an ambassador trip, when an extremist group in the country you're visiting makes an assassination attempt
It's a pitiful attempt, really, she could've easily beaten them without any help at all
But there was an archer involved who let an arrow loose just before they were tackled by a pile of guards, and hey, that's the woman you love
Next thing she knows she's being held firmly against your human side, the armored dragon half on full display between her and her attacker as the arrows bounce harmlessly off
She is both intimidated and impressed
Now whenever you're in that form next to her she'll be walking around with her cheeks puffed out in pride
Because yeah, that's MC, that super badass dragon person is all hers, that's her best friend, that's her bullet proof sweetheart
Lucio
He doesn't want to admit it, but he's kind of jealous
He thought he was the coolest with his clawed golden gauntlet, and here you are with half your body covered in scaly armor
He really, really wants to spar with you in that form now
Initially it's because he needs to prove to himself that he'll be able to win against you and maintain his status as the strength to your brains
But once he gets you to agree all he can do is admire you
As a natural-born fighter himself, he's drawn to anything that shares that nature with him, and yours is on full display like this
The way you're able to use your wing both offensively and defensively, the way your talons act as extra blades, the way the horned side of your face glares back at him
He's in love, he's so in love
He keeps getting distracted and messing up, so you let him call it a tie since you didn't really want to fight him in the first place
He can and will bring it up in every conversation he has, regardless of who it's with and what the context is
#the arcana headcanons#the arcana hc#the arcana#asra the arcana#julian the arcana#nadia the arcana#muriel the arcana#portia the arcana#lucio the arcana#the arcana shitpost#the arcana game#asra alnazar#julian devorak#nadia satrinava#portia devorak#muriel of the kokhuri#lucio morgasson#ask arcana brainrot
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The Radical Act of Quitting (and Wilhelm)
This is a little more personal than my Young Royals metas normally are. Itâs really one-half personal essay, one-half show analysis. Itâs something of a spiritual successor to my post about radical acceptance and Simonâs arc in season 2. And itâs also about the reasons why I want Wilhelm to renounce the crown by the end of season 3. (I am stating that early, because I know many people disagree. Feel free to engage but please do so with kindness; a lot of this is quite vulnerable for me.)
Iâm disabled. Specifically, I have a chronic condition that began in my early twenties, and slowly got worse and worse until I was finally diagnosed at 28. Iâm 31 now, and Iâve had to grieve the person I once was many times over. I used to be a dancer, I used to be an adventurous eater, I used to love to travel. My chronic pain and restrictive medical diet have taken those things away from me, piece by piece. But the thing I mainly want to talk about right now is quitting my job. At the time of my diagnosis, I had worked at my job full time for three years. For a few years after my diagnosis, I tried to remain at my job part-time, because I loved it. I worked in the music industry, and I had the best team of coworkers. I had a great work/life balance, I was never stressed about work. I looked forward to each day in the office. When I went to events and had to introduce myself during an ice-breaker, I would usually include a fact about my job. I found a lot of my identity there. All of my work directly supported musicians, which was something I was very proud of.
So I tried very, very hard to hang on to my job. My company gave out these ridiculously heavy plaques for employees who had been at the company for 5 years, and I was determined to get one. But it was really hard. I could no longer type sitting up for more than a few minutes, so I did every day from my lap desk in bed. (This is still where I write all of my fic and meta!) I struggled to talk to customers on the phone while I was in pain. The office was closed because of the pandemic, but I would have had to work from home regardless because I couldnât handle the commute. Every day was a slog. And my pain and fatigue werenât getting better. In fact they were continuing to get worse as time went on. Finally, my five-year work anniversary arrived. I made it, but I felt like a runner barely stumbling over the finish line. It was the end of 2021. I talked with my friends and my therapist and my disability benefits lawyer. âI donât think I can keep working,â I would say. And then I would cry, because the thought of letting go of this last part of my identity, when my illness had already taken so much, was so horrible.
After several months of deliberating and grieving, I quit. My boss begged me to reconsider (God bless him, honestly). Was there anything he could do to better accommodate my needs? Could I work a different schedule to let me sleep more? Could I work freelance on specific projects they really needed me on? I wanted to say yes so badly. But I knew. The longer I held on, the more I fought, the worse my health would become. And the worse my health would become, the more I would struggle with work. The joy I had felt during my first three years in that office had already drained away. I was fighting just to get through each day, and I didnât want to fight anymore.
I recognize that having the resources and disability benefits to even consider quitting is a huge privilege. There are a lot of disabled and chronically ill folks who struggle through work at great detriment to their health because they canât afford not to keep working. So I recognize how lucky I was to be able to quit. I am so grateful for that option, even as I mourn all the things I have lost.
In my meta about Simon, I talked about radical acceptance and how it has been my guiding light as a disabled person. Embracing radical acceptance means that I have done my best to accept what I can and cannot do, and what I can and cannot control, without judgment. I accepted that I needed to walk away from my job. But how was I supposed to define myself without it?
Capitalism defines most peoplesâ self-identity, whether they realize it or not. We identify with our jobs, or with the âgrindâ culture, or with the moral goodness associated with working hard. But here I was, without a job. And I had my whole adult life ahead of me. I had to find a way to make a new identity outside of work.
Around this time, I started to gravitate towards stories where characters are faced with similar decisions, even if I didnât realize it yet. And let me tell you, there arenât many of them.
@bluedalahorse and I talk about this a lot. In our ultra-franchised world, the point of stories, even those that are supposedly about rebellions, is often to return characters to the status quo, so that the next movie/comic/episode can pick back up where the last one left off. And when there is a significant change in the status quo, it is usually because the characters worked, and pushed, and struggled to achieve that change. Itâs very rare to see a story about someone who walked away from something that was harming them. Itâs rarer still to find something that deals with the aftermath, as characters work to re-establish themselves.
Iâve found a lot of comfort in true stories of people leaving cults and high demand religions, and of queer people forced to leave their conservative families behind. In all of these cases, people are consciously abandoning a predominant belief system that is harming them, and have to start over as they craft their new sense of identity. (I am also queer, which adds an additional level of connection). Often people in these situations come to rely on their found family, a thing I have also found to be true in my own life.
I quit my job in between seasons 1 and 2 of Young Royals, and I donât think I realized how many themes connected my experience to Wilhelmâs until I was watching season 2. Wilhelm is the protagonist of Young Royals, and his central dramatic question has always been: will he fulfill his duty as a royal? Or will he quit, and discover who he is beyond the system he was raised in? Simon is a huge part of this decision, obviously, but the question has never been strictly about Simon.
While I have no personal experience with the monarchy, I do know what itâs like to consider walking away from a role that you assumed you would fill for the rest of your life. I know what itâs like to think about quitting your job.
Thereâs so much pressure on Wilhelm to assume the role of perfect Crown Prince. Heâs told constantlyâby Kristina, by Jan-Olof, by the court-- that he canât let his family or his country down by deviating from this role in any way.
This is a pretty common experience for people who are trying to quit something. They are told that they will let down those around them if they leave. People who are leaving high demand religions are told that they will not be able to enter heaven. Queer people in conservative families are told they canât come out because âit would break [elderly relative]âs heart and kill them.â When I quit my job, I thought a lot about how Iâd be letting down my coworkers and everyone who knew me as a hyper-competent career-driven person.(This included some of my doctors by the way, who expressed their disappointment in my failure to adhere to their idea of a âworthyâ disabled person, i.e. someone who soldiered through the pain and continued to work. Some withdrew care because of this and honestly I will never forgive them). And maybe I was letting people down, and maybe ex-Mormons really will spend the afterlife in outer darkness, and maybe all the grandmas of queer people will be so upset that they kick the bucket when their grandkids come out. But ultimately, if your happiness or safety or well being depends on leaving, it doesnât really matter. You have to do it anyway. You have to abandon the things that you can no longer carry. You have to discover who you are on the other side of religion, of the closet, of capitalism.
I think about this every time people in the fandom talk about how Wilhelm leaving the line of succession will create a constitutional crisis, or impact all of Sweden negatively. I am personally pretty anti-monarchist, but I honestly canât even tell you if I think that Wilhelm removing himself from the line of succession would bring about the end of the Swedish monarchy or not. Honestly, I donât really care. I care about Wilhelm. I want him to seek happiness, to search for the future that must live on the other side of this oppressive system he finds himself in. A constitutional crisis? Thatâs Kristinaâs problem, thatâs Jan-Olofâs problem, thatâs the governmentâs problem. Radical acceptance means focusing on the things you can control, and Wilhelm can only control his own happiness.
When this issue gets debated, I often see people argue that Wilhelm is too young to make the decision to give up the throne. But the reality is that we ask teenagers to make decisions about their futures all the time. @bluedalahorse wrote a great piece of meta about that here. I love what she said so much Iâm going to quote it directly:
Nonetheless, we ask teenagers of Sara and Wilhelmâs ages to think about decisions that affect their future all the time. We ask them to consider what career theyâll pursue or what university to attend. Teenagers who grow up in various denominations of Christianity consider whether theyâre going to go through with Confirmation or sometimes Baptism. Other religions (ones where I canât speak from as much personal experience) have various other rites of passage around this age, and various cultures have coming of age rituals. For some teens, they do these things willingly and with their whole heart, whereas for others, they do it to please their parents or families or for the social norms of it all.
And if Wilhelm is too young to decide to give up the throne, how can he be old enough to decide to keep it? Surely the decision to take on the governance of a country, even in a symbolic way, requires as much, if not more, maturity than the decision to pursue a less high-powered career elsewhere.
When people in the fandom claim that Wilhelm is too young to make this decision, I hear Kristina telling Wilhelm to wait until heâs 18 to come out, because only then will he be responsible enough to deal with the consequences. Thatâs a delaying tactic, and nothing more. People who donât want you to leave will ask you to delay your decision over and over again, because they think that if they can kick the can down the road just a little farther, theyâll never have to lose you.
I also see people argue that Wilhelm isnât qualified to make a decision because he doesnât know enough about the âreal worldâ to know what he is choosing. To be honest I donât think most teenagers know much about the âreal worldâ. I definitely didnât. But we ask them to make decisions that will affect their futures anyway. And hereâs another way to look at this: Wilhelm has plenty of places he can look to for examples of how âordinaryâ people live. He can find out what itâs like to be from a noble but non-royal family from the students at Hillerska. He can talk to Simon and Linda about what their lives are like. He can read the millions of books, or watch the thousands of movies and TV shows that feature non-royal protagonists and were created by non-royal artists. But only Wilhelm knows what it is like to be Crown Prince. No one else has had that experience. So I would argue that actually, Wilhelm is the only one qualified to make this call.
Ultimately, the agency and mental capacity of people who are quitting is often doubted, usually by the people who have the most to gain by keeping them in place.
So many people have so much invested in maintaining the status quo. And as soon as you invest in a system, someone daring to leave puts your world view into question. Why are you dealing with so many oppressive rules if someone else can just leave? We see this a lot with high demand religions and cults; if someone threatens to break free, the members often join ranks and work together to pressure them to stay. What has your sacrifice as a woman in a patriarchal religion meant, for example, if another woman can decide to simply walk away? Does Kristinaâs grim life of duty and sacrifice matter, if Wilhelm can just opt out and seek happiness instead?Â
Then of course, there are all the benefits that an oppressive system confers on its most privileged members. Those benefits are in danger of disappearing if enough people quit, so high ranking people will work to keep others in line. Think about all the people who benefit from the monarchy: all the staff who work for the royal family, all the nobles who get their reputation by proximity to the monarch, and everyone in Sweden who in general benefits from the image that a long-standing institution of white, straight, conservative power projects.
And those arenât people Wilhelm needs to be responsible for (or should be concerned with placating, to be honest). If the monarchy fails because Wilhelm leaves, itâs because thereâs always been a fault in the system. Those relying on this outdated system have signed their own fate.
No one knows fully what life will be like after they quit. Thatâs the radical acceptance part of quitting. You have to make a blind leap, and discover a whole new world once you land. Wilhelm is no more sheltered than anyone before they take this leap. Everyone who quitsâa religion, a cult, a jobâhas to go through this process of rediscovery. You have to learn by doing. People do that successfully all the time, and I believe that Wilhelm can too.
When I was talking about this meta with @bluedalahorse, we talked a lot about Platoâs allegory of the cave. That story goes something like this:
Several prisoners have been kept inside a cave their entire life. They are chained to the spot, and cannot move. They are facing the back wall of the cave. Behind them is a fire, and in between them and the fire, their captors walk back and forth, casting shadows on the wall. Because the prisoners have been kept in the cave their entire life and have only ever seen shadows, they think the shadows are real. They think the only thing that exists in the world is shadows. Until one day, one of the prisoners is set free. He goes outside for the first time, where he is blinded by the sun and overwhelmed by stimulus. But he discovers the real world. He now knows that the shadows he was used to are pale imitations of the real things. Heâs so excited that he goes back to tell his fellow prisoners what he has learned. But the prisoners get angry at him for challenging their world view. They donât believe him, no matter what he says.
There are a lot of ways you can interpret this story. Some people think that Plato is talking about the role of philosophers in society. Some people use it to explain a philosophical concept he writes about elsewhere called âformsâ. But I think one thing is clear. Plato didnât write the allegory of the cave (and it didnât stick around in human imagination for thousands of years) because he thought you should stay in the cave. Leaving the cave is hard. You will be met with resistance. But discovering the real world, when you were only seeing shadows before, is worth it.
I want Wilhelm to leave to be happy, to see the real world instead of shadows. But I also believe itâs what the story demands. Itâs the only answer that makes asking the dramatic questionâshould Wilhelm conform or rebel?âworthwhile to me.
To be king, but to be the first gay king, would be such an unsatisfactory ending for me. It reminds me of how hard I tried to keep my jobâby working from bed, by reducing my hours. My boss could do the best he could to be accommodating, but ultimately working was harming me. You canât adapt the monarchy enough to make it a non-damaging space for Wilhelm, because there will always be people pressuring him to conform to its straight, stoic ideals. Those ideals have been around for hundreds of years, and to put all of the burden of reforming them on Wilhelm is unfair and unrealistic. If he does stay, I see him struggling to change a system that is not designed for him. Even if he does make small victories for representation or inclusion in that context, it will come at an enormous emotional cost. I just donât think itâs worth it. Not when thereâs a whole world where Wilhelm could be doing good, important workâ in whatever arena he choosesâ that wonât also come along with inherent emotional trauma.Â
Believe me, thereâs a whole world to be discovered after you walk away from something thatâs damaging you. You grieve, yes, but you also grow. Since quitting Iâve been able to love my friends harder, to treat myself better, to give back to the disabled community. I think if you talk to most people who have committed a similar act of radical quitting theyâll say the same thing. I want this future for Wilhelm, but I also want this kind of story to exist for all of us. I want there to be a story that represents those of us who have had to make these kinds of decisions. I want there to be a story that can encourage people who are currently wrestling with their desire to leave and the pressure to stay. And I want there to be a story that shows the hope, the bravery, and the self-belief that is required to walk away and seek a brighter future.
#young royals#prince wilhelm#wilhelm young royals#my meta#my crip media reviews#this turned out to be very long thank you if you read it all
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You canât sit here and call him equally mature and that he âlets them be kidsâ and then turn around and expect them all to coddle him constantly at the expense of their own desires. Are they supposed to act like parents or arenât they? Make up your minds.
Funnily enough, we don't actually see much evidence of the others accommodating Aang's diet. Quite the opposite like in The Painted Lady where they are shown that their only source of food is the town (because otherwise why the fuck would they be eating it) and the only thing they get is meat. Also, Aang hasn't shown disgust toward Katara's and Sokka's food, he's shown disgust toward specifically sea prunes. He's been shown to be fine with other water tribe food. He's also shown disgust toward apples. Does that make him unaccommodating too?
As for what they're supposed to do, maybe it has to do with my idea of what a friend is, but if I had a friend who was vegetarian, I wouldn't suggest they go to a place that strictly serves meat. Especially since I can eat meat just fine at other times. And if the group really wanted to go in, quite frankly, I would stay behind just to make sure one of my friends doesn't feel isolated.
And if they said they were going to get food out of the garbage? I'd pitch a fucking fit. Like hell a friend of mine is ever going to eat out of the fucking garbage if I have anything to say about it.
I don't consider that coddling or parenting. I consider that having basic concern and love for a friend. I'm frankly concerned that your idea of a healthy friendship is one in which accommodating other people is a sacrifice you suffer, and that they have to earn the right for this sacrifice otherwise it's coddling.
And you just know if this situation happened to Katara, where she couldn't eat something and the others went to a place that only serves that thing and leave her behind to get food from the garbage, people would absolutely condemn them for that. The anti-kataang people would be all over it as proof Aang doesn't even care if Katara eats or not.
Once again, anti-aang people show a lack of basic empathy. I would die for my friends, I would do anything I could for them, because I love them. I would happily commit to vegetarianism while around a friend who is vegetarian out of a cultural belief. Happily. Because they are my friend.
I'm not saying the gaang needs to go that far, I can admit I am particularly passionate about those I care for. But I feel like most people wouldn't let their friend eat out of the garbage.
Why the fuck would you?
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201123Â Weverse Magazine 'BE' Comeback Interview - Jimin
Jimin: âIâm the kind of person who likes to be lovedâ BTS BE comeback interview 2020.11.23
When heâs talking, Jimin often starts his sentence with phrases like, âI just,â âit just,â âthey just âŠâ But then he immediately goes on to open up about his feelings, always providing a sincere response.
On one V-LIVE session back in October, you wore the clothes that you had planned to wear at the airport if you were to go on tour. Jimin: I hadnât really noticed, but I think Iâve finally come to terms with the reality of our present situation.
By âsituation,â you mean how itâs difficult to meet your fans in person? Jimin: Yes. If we had to go on stage in this situation, or if we had to perform our songs, Iâm not sure how we would go about accomplishing that. At the same time, It felt like something that was closed up and blocked was opened up again. There isnât the kind of excitement we got from tour season, though, so itâs easy to feel worn out. But, just like when weâre making new songs, I try to do whatever I can.
BE feels like itâs all about taking care of your feelings and the process of moving forward. Jimin: I had the role of listening to what the members wanted to include in the album, but itâs more a record of the present than it is about our individual feelings. We talked openly about how weâre having a hard time and how weâre trying our best to get over things, and that became the album.
As the project manager for BE, how did you go about gathering and organizing all the membersâ ideas? Jimin: I became the project manager because Yoongi recommended I do it, but I didnât think I had to lead anything along, more just make sure the other members could do their work quickly and easily. Usually that meant asking about their opinions, or passing opinions back and forth with our company. So I would collect ideas, organize them, say, âThese are some of the ideas we got back. What do you think?ââask them again, if they said okay, pass it on to the company, and if they made a song, I sent that over, too.
How did you prod along the members who were taking too long with their ideas? (laughs) Jimin: I would mention them by name in our group chat, and that got them to reply. (laughs) Any time I said someone or other didnât submit their idea yet, all the others would chime in with, âHurry up, guys!â and then theyâd give it to me.
Sounds like itâs great for one of the members to be project manager. (laughs) How did you accommodate all the different ideas? Jimin: When we first started, we sat down for about an hour and said: If you feel downtrodden, just make a song about feeling desperate; if you want to give others hope, go ahead and write a hopeful song. Letâs find the topic and work from there. And since thereâs seven of us, and the albumâs going to be about current events, letâs put in one skit to make seven songs; and letâs not put in any solo songs. Letâs make something that we can all work on together.
That approach must have been different from the way you worked on your other recent albums. Jimin: We never said anything like, somebody will make this song and someone else will make that song. We would just take a song and say, Who wants to do this? Who wants to do that? I became more ambitious, and wanted the other members to recognize the work I was doing. And because it was so fun working together, any time I made something, I wanted to play it for them right away. I also loved when they gave me compliments, so that added to the fun. When the songs are eventually finished, we hoped the fans would be able to pick up on all those emotions exactly as we felt them, although there are some songs that didnât make the cut. (laughs) It was really fun.
You could say that, while itâs important to deliver songs to the fans, the process of creation itself is also important. Jimin: A little while ago, I learned something new about myself: Iâm the kind of person who likes to be loved. Looking back, I realized I do what I do not just for the work itself, but to be loved by my friends, family, the group, and fans. Itâs been really hard to hold onto those connections, but I felt a fullness once I was sure of that love and kept those relationships close. It was like getting something of my own.
Rather than simply being loved, is it actually a satisfaction arising from the effort involved and the deep sense of trust it builds? Jimin: I used to think more frequently about what I was getting from them than what I was doing for everyone else. Even if I donât strictly owe our fans or group members anything in return, I feel a deep and sincere appreciation for all the things they do for me. I also saw some people for who they really are, some people who donât really care about me. Rather than pushing those people away, I learned how to react less emotionally to them. Likewise, I was able to be more emotionally honest with people who are very considerate toward me.
Itâs become difficult to express those kinds of feelings to fans these days. The only choice, really, is to talk to them through your songs. What is your message this time? Jimin: Thereâs a message in every album and music video we make; but you donât have to understand the message, I just hope you enjoy listening and watching. Thatâs the first thing. I hope you really like the songs and videos I created while working to not become complacent, so I took great care and practiced a lot to present something perfect to you.
On that note, I think your singing and dancing are changing quite a bit. Your performances in âBlack Swanâ and âDynamiteâ are completely different, but perhaps because of your changed body silhouette, the feel of your dance has become more consistent. As a dancer, what is it you want to express? Jimin: I just hope my emotions come across. I just want the emotions I put into my dancing, actions, and singing to be felt. So I got a lot of feedback, asked around, did some research and found that for each emotion you might express on stage, thereâs a body most appropriate for the job. We all have different body types. In order to get the body that can best express my emotions at my age, I went on a strict diet, but I donât stick to it nearly as intensely as I used to. (laughs)
If you watch your dance in âDynamite,â your body, especially when you turn away, looks different from before. You look lighter. What effect did your new body have on your dance moves? Jimin: I look how I want to look when Iâm around 58 kg, so I went on a diet and lost 5 kg. Thatâs when I found the look I wanted to present to everyone. I canât be objective about myself, but there was a certain vibe that I wanted. In the past I tried really hard to be no-frills, and by focusing less on trying something new and more on avoiding mistakes, I prevented myself from advancing any further. But in âDynamite,â I tried out expressions Iâd never tried before. I wanted people to be able to tell that I was really concentrating on this when they watched the video, so for this song, I tried to be sentimental andâhow should I put thisâI even tried to look suave (laughs) and funny, too . I ended up focusing on painting a single picture rather than on each of the individual elements.
And what is it you wanted to show off? Jimin: We havenât been able to put on a real show during COVID-19. I wanted to show that we didnât waste all that time but rather have kept going through it all, that we keep working hard. But portraying âworking hardâ through dance would look really tiring, so I smiled and danced throughout filming âDynamite.â
How was that possible? It couldnât have been easy to keep the whole team motivated. Jimin: With the spread of COVID-19, it took us a while to really believe our rise to the top of the Billboard Hot 100. When we checked our phones and it said we got first place we were amazed, but it was hard to believe, although we were all crying. (laughs) But when COVID-19 first hit, we said, âAh, itâll pass quickly and weâll be right back on tour.â The reason was that we had said, even if it gets tough, letâs give it our all for the next year. Give it our all and collapse.. That was the plan, but we were really disappointed. What was worse was, when I heard it would be hard to have any performances this year, my head ⊠it sort of went blank. My mind was empty. We couldnât just take a break either. Other people had it really hard but we could keep working. I didnât know whether we should be happy or sad about it. There were no answers for anything. It was really tough.
How did you get over that? Jimin: If an interviewer or anyone else asked me what my goal was, I told them my goal is to perform with the members for a long time, and that is probably my biggest goal; but I was really saying that to the group: I want to be with you guys for a really long time. I think we conveyed that feeling well to one another. I seriously worried a lot that the group would get exhausted. But theyâd be laughing with one another, cheering each other up. We had a lot more time to chat together, so whatever was going on, we could always talk about it over a drink at our home and work it out.
What makes you take your work so seriously? Jimin: I really want to love this job inside and out. If we just look at work as work, all weâll be after is money, but I never once thought that our groupâs dynamic, or the relationship we have with our fans, was based on that. But I think if youâre exhausted mentally and physically, the work becomes a chore, and then your relationships will inevitably suffer. Thatâs what I was afraid of.
The song âDis-easeâ is about how each member feels about working. How do you feel about your work? Jimin: I donât consider my main profession, performing and singing, âgoing to work.â. But when Iâm doing something else with the camera right in front of me,that feels like âwork.â Singing and performing for our fans isnât workâitâs something I really, really want to do.
You helped write âDis-ease,â correct? Jimin: The bridge. I was recording with Pdogg and there was one part that didnât have a melody, soâshould I call it improv?âI was just singing something without thinking about it, and then he asked me to sing that again. So I asked if he was sure, and then he asked me to write the melody, so I ended up writing it.
Some of the other songs on BE have something like that too, but âDis-easeâ somehow feels particularly like old school Korean hip hop. Jimin: I thought so too. I thought of 20 years ago when I sang it. The majority of the song was written by j-hope, so that might just be my thinking (laughs) but I sang it when there was a question mark on who would sing the vocals. I was really doing whatever I wanted, so I sort of had to be restrained (laughs) but it was fun.
Was there any place the vocals changed while recording? There are a lot of parts on BE where you use almost a normal speaking voice. Jimin: I usually already have the big picture set in my mind when I sing, but this time it wasnât like that. âLife Goes On,â especiallyâthat songâs not about me, but I couldnât help but empathize with it, so right from the beginning I performed it without having to think about how my voice should sound. I wasnât thinking about some particular emotion of mine I wanted to express to you. I just recorded exactly the feelings I had as I sang.
Thereâs a song titled, âTelepathy.â When you streamed yourselves in production on YouTube, the group mentioned the idea of telepathy which made me think you were sending the song directly to your fans. If you could talk to them through telepathy, what would you say? Jimin: People have kind hearts, and I just hope they donât let that go. You asked about telepathy, but I think we really do have a telepathic connection with our fans. Itâs not crystal clear or anything, but I think if weâre sincere then they can feel it somehow. I think thatâs why our fans support us and are always by our side.
And what about the other way around? What would you like to hear from your fans? Jimin: One thing Iâm always curious about, about our fans, is whatâs the hardest thing in their lives. What each of them is struggling with, whatâs making them happyâIâm really curious to know. We face our own difficulties as well, so I always wonder if thereâs someone in each of our fansâ lives to ask them if theyâre doing okay. I hope things get better soon, that people can keep holding on, and that the adults will follow all the rules. Kids donât have a lot of options right now to do the things they want to do. I imagine a lot of kids see this as something thatâs being forced upon them by adults, so I hope the grown-ups will properly explain the situation to the kids so they can help each other too, to end the pandemic.
The news is saying that theyâve made a COVID-19 vaccine, so you might be able to meet your fans sooner than later. What are you going to say to them when you finally see them again? Jimin: I donât think weâll say anything. I think weâll just look at each other for a very long time. And if Iâm able to say anything, Iâll probably say, âYou made it. Now letâs get back to having a good time.â
Trans © Weverse
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I was looking at my most recent notifications and saw that there was a user called @disabledmusclelover who recently started to enjoy my content.
I saw that they are a disabled user who loves muscle men just like we all do. I decided to make this story to be as inclusive as this blog can be and write a story involving a disabled character getting his own spotlight. Despite any disabilities, we all can be strong and be transformed to our ideal fantasies. I wanted to write this to help tell more diverse stories and help make myself a better writer. I challenge other blogs to try making inclusive stories like this and see how y'all interpret inclusivity in your own blogs. So for those who are physically impaired, I hope that you enjoy this story and would like more in the future with some constructive criticism †I hope you all like this new approach I am trying to do!
It was a beautiful day, so Derek decided to take his laptop and work outside. Derek was always cooped up inside being an IT manager so it would do him some good to answer emails while getting some vitamin D.
Derek scrolled through his emails, typical deals of electronics and work reports. Derek began to be bored, until he scrolled to an unusual email he had never seen before.
"Epic offer! Come to Muscle World to claim your free 6 months membership today!"
Hmm, Derek never signed up for this gyms email list. As Derek looked at the email, he decided to try out the gym since he could try and get a little more healthier.
As a kid, Derek got in a car crash that paralyzed his lower body. He's been in a wheelchair ever since. But this didn't stop Derek, whose overcome a lot in his life.
The work day ended and Derek got changed and headed to Muscle World, which was in a part of town he never knew about. Derek entered the gym and was greeted by a receptionist who looked like he could lift Derek while he was still in his chair. Derek greeted the receptionist and showed him the email about the membership trial. The receptionist was very nice and took Derek's information and walked him to the training room. Derek was then introduced to what looked like Hercules himself. The Adonis introduced himself and said his name was Youseff, who had a German accent.
Youseff showed Derek around the facility. He also told Derek that Muscle World can accommodate for Derek's condition when they begin his training. The gym had the typical machines and weights that Derek expected a gym to have. Youseff took Derek to the gym's juice bar and picked out some containers and concocted a drink and asked Derek to try it out. Derek took a sip and was punched with a strong flavor. Derek was not expecting that to be so strong. Youseff explained that Derek would go under a diet that would help him on his journey.
Youseff put Derek through a tough first session, and Derek was very sore after the session ended. Youseff gave Derek a large jug of the concoction that he tried out and was told to take a cup of it every morning when he wakes up. Derek took the jug and went home.
Derek woke up the next day feeling super sore from the session. He rolled into his bathroom and noticed that he looked less bloated than usual. Hmm, looks like just one session had made progress. Derek poured a cup of the drink he was told to take and chugged it down, making a sour face after feeling the sensation of it going down his throat like yesterday.
Derek went to work and while he was working, he could feel his shirt sliding across his body weird, as if it got slightly tighter as the day progressed. The work day ended and Derek went straight to the gym for his second session. Youseff once again put Derek through hell with a lot of upper body cardio, weight training, and stretches.
Almost 6 months had passed and Derek had gone through so much with Youseff as his trainer. He now lost a lot of the fat in his stomach and gained a decent amount of muscle to start getting shirts in large. Derek woke up yet again and looked at his still pretty full jug of the concoction. Derek had the urge to drink the entire thing in one sitting. No, he thought, and filled the appropriate amount in his cup. Derek took it and then looked down at the empty cup. Without hesitation, Derek dropped the cup and picked up the jug and started to chug down the entire drink.
Derek set down the now empty jug and released a massive burp. Derek then called in to work and took a day off to be at the gym. Derek arrived at the gym and immediately went to the weights. It felt like Derek had literal electricity running through his veins. He began to lift heavy weights up and down, loving the adrenaline fueling his thirst to work his muscles. As Derek pumped up his muscles, his hair began to recede into his head, leaving a shining bald head where he once had a nice head of hair. Derek's biceps began to grow big and his veins began to pulse up and down as they began to thicken and show all across his arms. Derek went to work on his chest and as he moved the bar up and down, his chest slowly swelled up pushing his tank top forward filling it out to its max. Derek was so high on the concoction that he wheeled to the pull-up bar, where he never went, and began to lift himself up and down. His now enormous arms were able to lift him up still in the wheelchair and each rep made his back develop more and more muscle. Hours had past, and Derek was lifting lighter dumbells to relax and end his pretty much all day session. Derek looked at his arms and looked at his now 27" bicep go up and down.
Youseff walked into the gym and called out Derek. "Damn is that you Derek?! Looks like my special shake has helped you get up to my level my friend!". Derek thanked Youseff, not realizing his voice had dropped down like 3 octaves. The two men shook hands, with Derek's hand now the same size as Youseff's hand. Derek said he'd see him tomorrow morning and said that he's gonna have to start his actual membership in the morning. Derek was proud of how much he'd accomplished in 6 months and now had the craving to grow even bigger than he was now.
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hey Pandoraimperatix, my friend I would like to request sunflower Behave Yourself Make Me for Batcat and Violet Stop staring at me to distract me!" "Oh , I'm not staring to distract you ." for Dickkory.
Sorry for the huge delay, it has been busy lately.
We go back to the Titans AU that only exists in my heart in a time between season one and two in which Trigon is gone, but the core four + Jason are living together as a family and the rest of the adults Titans are... Dunno.
Beware, this is so sugary Iâm now dependent of insulin.
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It started as a regular game night, and for the first two hours or so it really happened as it should.
Gar was in charge of food, so even though everything in the menu was vegetarian he managed to serve a delicious feast with plenty decadent deep fried snacks that Dick would never approve, there was no cauliflower pizza nonsense and frizzy drinks with real sugar in their composition among the diet options.
Rachel fixed the games, Gar offered, but she dismissed him saying that he had too much a niche taste and Jason would only pick the boring battle ones. Besides, she was better at guessing which kind of game would entertain their family without causing a horrible fight over whom was owing whom rent at monopoly or something.
Jason was in charge of music, because he was the only one of the whole team with a decent taste. Or that's what he claimed.
Dick and Kory were not allowed to have any say in the game night activities, the kids said they were merely invited to join. Dick, being true to his namesake wanted to forbid the whole thing, already thinking of all the many ways a night of fun and games could turn into chaos and disgrace. But when Rachel proposed it, she already expected that from him, and thatâs why she asked him right after Koryâs morning flight, so when she entered the room, skin glowing fresh from a sunbath, he seemed to had lost the train of his thoughts, mumbling something incoherent, Rachel took that as a yes and ran with it.
But after all the food was gone the strangest thing started to happen. Stranger than Jason going to bed early instead of throwing a fit after losing three rounds or darts in a row. Dick was worried and even tried to talk to him, worried he was just self-isolating out of frustration, but when he went to the boy's room found him actually reading, that gave him a weird mix of surprise and bittersweet joy over his little brother's evolution. He was better now, and didn't need him as much.
But when he went back to the living room there was only Kory.
âWhere are Gar and Rachel?â
Kory took a while to answer because she had just stuffed her mouth with a particular big deep fried veggie dumpling, Dick tried to not fixate too much on how plump and kissable her lips were, but he probably didnât make a very good job. All those long acting classes with Alfred growing up and now, twenty years and an alien princess after, he suddenly couldnât hide his feelings. Dishonour on him, dishonour on his bats.
âCould have asked you the same,â she said finally swallowing down, and now it was her elegant neck and the dark path to her cleavage that was catching his eyes. Damn, it should be worrisome how much pull she had over him. It was true that he had a past o falling in love with his female teammates and it usually ended badly, but there was something different about him and Kory. While with Dawn and Babs there was always the shadow of this other man he supposed to be, a better man, and the weight of the expectations he put on himself and that he felt at the time that his exes added to, crushed their relationship.
Kory⊠Well, even after meeting Bruce last time they went to Gotham to officialise Jasonâs situation â and also a move orchestrated by Alfred to meet his new grandchildren â she didnât change with him. Of course, she didnât have years of indoctrinating to find Batman the most amazing man in existence, but even after learning his status, and listening to stories about him, she didnât look as impressed as people usually did. And for some crazy miracle, she was still very much interested in him, Dick, whom she already knew better than most people, maybe even better than Donna, and enough to know all his worst faults, enough to tell him he was being stupid when he let all his paranoia and inferiority complex make him act out. And she was still there, in love with him.
âAre they coming back? Thereâs still food.â
âWhoâs to say?â she said in a nonchalant tone, as she picked the fallen darts from the floor.
He crossed his arms, eying her with amused suspicion.
âMiss Anders, what are you planning?â
âMe?â she asked over her shoulder. âNothing at all,â and he didnât believe a bit, but waited and she straighten up, turning back to face him. âBut we donât need the kids to have fun, do we?â
And he could have died right there, the last thing heâd see was the smile she was giving to him, his favourite, that was in equal measures playful, promising, innocent and very dirty. That picture alone with be worthier than any paradise.
Dick walked towards her, and positioned his body behind hers, framing her hips with his hands. âDepending of the type of fun you have in mindâŠâ he said against her ear after pulling her hair aside.
Kory clicked her tongue in disapproval, but leaned back into him slightly, âGrayson, Grayson, what a naughty mind you have.â She prepared to throw a dart and recoiled when he kissed her neck. âI was merely trying to challenge you for a dartsâ competition.â
âYeah?â
She turned her face to look at him, her eyes glowing so green in the way he learned it meant she was getting aroused.
âYes.â
Dick let her go and didnât comment when she let out a disappointed sigh.
âI accept,â he took a sip of his own sugar free pop and regretted immediately because it became flat after being forgotten for so long, âwhat do I get when I win?â
âCocky, arenât we?â
âIn time.â
She bended in half unable to hide her giggles.
âYou are ridiculous.â
He just pouted.
Kory rolled her eyes in amusement, took a deep breath to calm herself and prepared to throw her first dart.
"Stop staring at me to distract me!" She complained.
"Oh, I'm not staring to distract you."
She threw it and it missed, badly. Dick pressed his lips but wasnât able to hold his own laughter.
âThatâs your fault!â her face was glowing golden, and Dick resented the fact they didnât get to meet earlier, how had been Kory as a teenager? Was she easier to rile up back then? Nowadays, she was the coolest person he ever met, cooler than Bruce, than his uncle Clark. It was the rarest thing to see Kory act in a self-conscious way, and he would be lying if he said he didnât enjoy this newfound power he had. The power to make Princess Koriandâr blush.
âIâll be more careful now when you start throwing starbolts around from now on,â he teased.
âIâll use you as my training target, thenâ was her comeback.
âI think Iâll be fine.â
She sighed and turned back to him, her hands on her hips.
âWhy are you torturing me?â
He gave her his best kicked puppy look.
âWe are here, all alone, and all you care about is some dumb gameâŠâ
Koryâs face broke in one of her full smiles and she threw the darts without even looking, all of them bullâs eye, and walked towards him, hugging him by the neck.Â
âAwnnnn, is that it? Why didnât you say earlier?â
He let go of his demure stance and in a display of his true intentions hoisted her up by her backside, Kory let out an elated exclamation and adjusted her arms grabbing his face and bringing their lips together.
âHmm,â he made as she parted from his lips to let him breathe and spread kisses down his neck, âcan we really? Wonât they come back?â
âNah,â she said licking his ear, âI gave them money.â
âNot only she has a very good aim, but sheâs also so smart,â he mumbled as he walked them to the sofa.
âArenât I a catch?â she said opening her legs to accommodate him after he lied her body on the cushions, and pushed his floppy hair back behind his ear, âarenât you lucky?â
âThe luckiest,â and he kissed her.
#dickkory#dickkori#starfire#nightwing#robstar#koriand'r#dick grayson#kory anders#kori anders#teen titans#titans#hbo titans#dcu titans#netflix titans#ntt#new teen titans
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Pumpkin Pie and Cheese Buns
Author:Â @evestedicâ
Prompt: Hard working coming home for thanksgiving. Stops at the store on the way to pick up the dessert she didnât bother to make no one will notice anyway and runs into their ex lover. Tries to leave fast but has to take the walk of shame back to grab the cranberries too. Arrives home not just with the cranberries and pieâŠÂ [submitted by anonymous]
Rating: T
____________
âGod damn it!â Katniss was not happy.Â
It was Thanksgiving, which meant she was being forced to spend time with people she didnât even know.
Why?
Because theyâre family, Katniss.
She could hear her Aunt Marthaâs voice.Â
Why should she care that her cousin was getting married?
Or that her nephew had gotten into college?Â
Or that her godfather was slipping her a 20 buck bill while winking an eye at her?Â
She wasnât a total bitch, so she bore with it, but this was people she saw one fucking time per year!Â
If it wasnât for Thanksgiving, she was sure she wouldnât see them again as they never even called. Nor did she.
But, be that as it may, Prim loved big gatherings and the attention; she was, after all, quite cheerful. Her father also bore with it, although better than her.Â
However, who knew? This year her mother was coming with her new boyfriend.Â
Ugh, pukeâŠÂ
And that was why she was there, November the 26th, coming back from work and on her way to Auntâs Marthaâs house.Â
Katniss was not happy.Â
She had already left the store not five minutes ago, but something kept nagging at the back of her head while she accommodated the bags in the back of her car.Â
Of course, being who she was, she had forgotten dessert. The pumpkin pie with maple whipped cream. Sighing and fuming, she went back to the absolute chaos of the aisles. If she arrived at her auntâs without dessertâŠwell, she would rather face a biblical plague.Â
After perusing the dessert stand and seeing everything was completely wiped outânot even crumbs were leftâshe gave up and thought about getting some canned peaches and cherries. Thatâs when she heard itâŠÂ  Â
âIs that you, Katniss?âÂ
That voice.Â
She had loved it at one point. Now, it was just nails on a chalkboard.Â
Turning around, she set her eyes on a huge blonde guy; he had a perfect gym advertisement body, a smirk on his face, and his arm around a blonde girl with the same perfect gym advertisement body.Â
âCato.âÂ
âBuying for Thanksgiving?â
âNo, just came because I was craving some peaches.âÂ
âOh.â
Seriously? It was the most direct sarcastic answer ever, and he had actually believed her?Â
Katniss rolled her eyes and was about to turn around when the Barbie clone spoke.Â
âIs this the one, babe?â
âYes, baby, thatâs her.â
âOh, I thought sheâd beâŠI donât know, prettier?â
âShe never wanted to put in the effort, baby.â
âShe is standing right here. And if working out turns you dumb, Iâm glad I didnât do it.âÂ
Katniss had gone out with Cato for two years when they were nineteen. Back then, he had been a kind guy, funny and perhaps a bit silly, but very nice, normal. He had asked her out after a college party, and she accepted; the rest was history.Â
However, after one year of being together, he began frequenting the campus gym and suddenly started to change. All he could talk about were diets, exercise, and protein. Katniss was all in for a healthier life; hell, she knew if she kept on eating Greasy Saeâs food every other night, she was going to clog her arteries by the time she was 35, but Cato was relentless. He got rid of all of her comfort food and she had been forbidden to eat chicken and meat ever again. Only turkey and fish were allowed, vegetables, no dairy or eggs, no sugar! She was going crazy; Katniss had reached the obscene point of hiding in the bathroom to eat a Snickers bar, only to quickly brush her teeth and rinse with Listerine at least thrice so that her boyfriend wouldnât taste any trace of chocolate when he kissed her. It was that night when she knew she couldnât do it anymore. She no longer recognized the guy she had agreed to date or herself, for that matter. So, Katniss decided to end it right then and there. She skipped her next class and went to their dorm only to find him banging the very same Barbie girl who was in front of her in the canned aisle right now.Â
Quickest breakup ever.Â
He had said it was her fault for not âputting in the effort,â and she hated him for it.Â
âJealousy doesnât fit you, Katniss. Well,â Cato gave her a once-over, âI doubt anything does. Have you gained weight?âÂ
âIf I have, that wouldnât be any of your fucking business. What are you doing here? Came to buy something for dinner? I think thereâs a celery and mineral water pack on sale.âÂ
âStill salty because I chose someone better?â Cato shamelessly licked the girlâs ear, making her giggle in an obnoxious way that made Katniss want to gag.Â
She didnât have to stand here and watch this; she-
Was that a hand on her waist?
âHey, sorry I took so long. I literally had to wrestle this from an old lady.âÂ
That voice.Â
Peeta Mellark was holding onto her waist and smiling that charming smile that could probably tame a wild animal, while proudly presenting a ham to her.
âUmâŠâ Eloquent as always.Â
âOh, sorry. I didnât know you were with friends.âÂ
âYeah, noâŠNot my friends.âÂ
âArenât you the baker guy? Youâre slumming it with the bakery employee?â Cato laughed while BarbieâKatniss really couldnât care less about her actual nameâlooked at Peeta appreciatively.Â
âI havenât introduced myself,â Peeta said, extending his right hand but not letting Katnissâ waist go. Cato immediately took it, flexing his bicep as he did so, but his expression faltered when he shook Peetaâs hand. âPeeta Mellark, owner of ïżœïżœThe Cake Lairâ. Have you guys ever been?âÂ
Katniss was confused.Â
It wasnât as if she and Peeta were actually friends. They had talked, yes. She simply loved the pastries he sold, and because of how she had raved about his cheese buns, wellâŠthe double entendre put her in an uncomfortable position, but he had only laughed and thanked her for the compliment, as he had, in fact, baked those himself.Â
Peeta always made sure to set aside at least two cheese buns for her prior to the end of the day.Â
And okay, yeah, they had exchanged numbers and texted from time to time, but nothing deep. It was always things about the weather, the cheese buns, or how Prim was. Did that qualify as being friends?Â
Katniss was awful at being a good friend, hence why she only had two: Gale and Madge. Her sister and father didnât count; they were family.Â
Shaking her head, she returned to the present to find that arm still around her and Catoâs face getting red.Â
âJust let go, dude. Youâre about to pop a vein.â Peeta chuckled.Â
Katniss directed her gaze at their hands; she could see they were both squeezing the hell out of each other. Cato probably thought he could scare Peeta off with his muscles, but he clearly hadnât seen Peeta shirtless on a hot day, hauling 100-pound flour sacks onto his back as if they were light cargo. Peeta was strong, like âI could iron clothes on your stomachâ fit; he just didnât flaunt it, and Katniss appreciated that.
Cato huffed and let go, and Peeta smiled once more and winked at Barbie, who was giggling like an idiot.Â
âSo, we should be going soon if we want to make it, Katniss. You know how Aunt Martha gets if we donât get the groceries in time for her.âÂ
So yeah, she had told him about her hellish weekend to come last week, but Katniss didnât think he would remember.Â
With his hand still on her waist and her still not shrugging it off, they made to pass Cato and his doll, but, of course, the bodybuilder felt the need to use the sole neuron in his brain.Â
âYou know youâre just a replacement, right? I mean, she went and looked for the next guy that kinda looked like me because she clearly canât forget me.âÂ
Tuck your thumb over your middle finger to make a proper fist. If you wrap your fingers around your thumb, youâre likely going to break it.Â
Her fatherâs words and the boxing lessons came back in a flash, and before Peeta could hold her back, Katniss pivoted on her left foot, momentum aiding her, and connected her first with Catoâs jaw. She wasnât an expert boxer or anything of the sort; she just liked the exercise, and she was strong. But Katniss must have been lucky enough to hit the sweet spot because Cato dropped to the aisle floor, unconscious.Â
âBabe!â Barbie girl screeched, and suddenly, two more gorilla-looking guys were coming to her aid.Â
Friends of his, no doubt.Â
âTell your boy toy, next time he wants to bully me to think twice, lest he finds himself beaten up again by a woman,â Katniss spat at the blonde girl.Â
âYou did this?â A broad and tall black guy asked. He was actually pretty scary, but Katniss held her ground and managed to nod. To her surprise, he chuckled and sort of bowed to her. âHeâs an ass. I bet he had it coming. Weâll take care of him.âÂ
âThresh! Heâs your friendâŠâ Barbie girl actually had tears in her eyes.Â
âHeâs not. Weâre just in the same weightlifting class. And donât cry; heâll come to soon. Finnick, help me bring this idiot back.âÂ
âYou must have a mean right hook, hon,â the guy with reddish hair and perfect teeth told Katniss.Â
âI do.â She jutted out her chin proudly; her dad had taught her well.Â
âNice to know you have it all sorted out. Katniss, should we go?â Peeta was pulling her a bit, and she let him, both soon finding themselves out in the parking lot, having decided to leave behind the cans and the ham.Â
Once they were in front of her car, Katniss did something she rarely did.Â
âIâm sorry I cost you your ham.âÂ
Peeta seemed surprised, but he simply smiled. âThatâs okay. There are a lot of hams left, actually; I just needed an excuse to walk up to you.âÂ
âWhy did you do that?âÂ
âThat guy was an ass, and I know you couldâve handled it on your own, butâŠ,â he leaned in a bit and whispered, âdoesnât it feel good to let him know youâre with someone much better now?âÂ
Katniss couldnât help it, she laughed. âYouâre full of yourself, Mellark!âÂ
âHey! Iâm a catch, I tell you. Owner of his own bakery, hard-working; I know how to cook and bake, and Iâm easy on the eyes, too.âÂ
âNot to mention, tons and tons of humility.âÂ
âThat, too.â He smiled, and Katniss rolled her eyes, but she really didnât feel angry with him. She hadnât needed his help, but he had offered it freely without expecting anything in return. âSo, I guess this is where we part ways.âÂ
âWhat are your plans for tonight, Peeta?â Katniss suddenly asked, and he was surprised as well.Â
âUhhhh, not much. Bake something? Eat it while watching TV, nothing exciting.âÂ
âYou can come to my Aunt Marthaâs, if you want. Prim would love to see you, and this way I can repay your âact of kindnessâ.âÂ
âReally? You sure it wouldnât bother you?âÂ
âIf it did, I wouldnât have asked.âÂ
âSure, Iâd love to.âÂ
âOkay, but before that, thereâs something I need you to do for me.âÂ
âWhat is it?âÂ
âCan you drive? My right hand is killing me.âÂ
                        °âą. âż .âąÂ°
âWhy couldnât you just buy it?â Katniss whined.
âBecause I actually enjoy baking. You should know this already.â Peeta chuckled as he handled the mixer. After a few more turns, it seemed everything was ready. âI just need to flour the containers now.â Peeta patted his hands on his apron and went back to the pantry.Â
Katniss took her chance.Â
She slowly inched her hand forward, her eyes not leaving Peetaâs back, just in case.Â
Two more inches and-
âI swear, Katniss, if youâre reaching for that dough I wonât make any cheese buns for a week.â
âYou wouldnât dare!â she exclaimed, shocked. That wasnât fair! Peeta hadnât even turned around, but he knew what she had been about to do.Â
âTry me, love.â He then approached the table again, watching a grumbling Katniss cross her arms. âYou know you canât have raw dough while pregnant.â
âThatâs a stupid rule. I bet itâs invented. How did women manage centuries ago, then?âÂ
âOh, I donât know. They sometimes died intoxicated, so no biggie.â Peeta was serious now.Â
âI wouldnât die over a bit of doughâŠâ She said it under her breath, but he heard.
Peeta sighed, and Katniss felt a pang of regret. Damn him. âKatniss, do we really have to discuss this again? Itâs Thanksgiving, and Iâd bet my bank account Aunt Martha would come down here and force you to go to the party if you werenât so-âÂ
âGo on, finish what you were going to say.â Katniss knew she was so big she might be in need of her own postal code.Â
â-tired. Youâre carrying twins, and thatâs not an easy feat. The only thing she asked for was the pumpkin pie with maple whipped cream.â
âEvery fucking year.âÂ
âShe indulges during the holiday.â
âWhy not just get one from the bakery?â
âShe wants it fresh.âÂ
âWhy doesnât she come down here and get it herself?â
âYou really want your Aunt Martha here? Right now? Today?â
ââŠNo.â Why did Peeta have to be so logical?Â
âI know youâre crabby and your feet are probably swelling. Let me put this in the oven, and then Iâll massage them with some of that lavender cream your mother gave you.âÂ
âAnd a bath.â
âA massage and a bath, you got it.âÂ
Peeta, of course, fulfilled his promise and left Katniss so relaxed she fell asleep and didnât even notice her husband had gone and come back from the Everdeenâs annual Thanksgiving gathering.Â
By the time she opened her eyes, he was sitting next to her, reading a book.Â
âHeyâŠdid you all get a proper rest?â Peeta put a hand on her belly, smiling.Â
âI think so, yeah; they just started moving.âÂ
âI can feel. Here, let me help you up.â Peetaâs strength was no joke. He could single-handedly lift her up, yes, even when she felt like a whale, and prop her on the bed so she could sit comfortably. âThat okay?âÂ
âYes, perfect.âÂ
âHappy anniversary, love.â He presented her with a huge cheese bun, making her laugh.
âPeeta, just because we fucked for the first time four years ago today, doesnât mean itâs an anniversary.â
âFor me it is! Come on, I bet you didnât think weâd end up doing it in the bathroom that night.âÂ
âI seriously didnât.â
âBut here we are, and thatâs all that matters.âÂ
Her husband really was the cheesiest person alive, but she secretly adored that part of him.Â
âShut up and let me enjoy my cheese bun.â
âYour wish is my command.âÂ
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Mythologic AU (arthur)
(this is copied from an extended (very extended aka 35 pages in gdocs even after removing the avatars rip) discussion of an au Iâd been sitting on for years i decided to share on discord a while back and am interested in eventually rpâing. will be posting more - specifically on the au as a whole as well as lew and viviâs aspects in different posts)
tldr arthur is a very unfortunate mix of dragon genes but we love him regardless
mythological au where the whole group is some sort of creature and artie's parents were a wyvern and a wyrm, and he inherited the worst possible combination of traits for his dragon form.
lance gets to be the badass grumpy wyvern while art is literal noodle boy
he littel water snek
can't fly, no venom, no fire/element breath... he won the lottery of getting literally none of the good traits from either side, rip.
just curl in his kiddie pool because it's Texas in summer and some MORON (me) gave him GILLS
here's the lil note section for easier reading:
2 short legs
2 tiny wings
no flying
awkward noodle body
gills (in Texas!)
main seafood diet
no ears
hoarding compulsion/need
no fire/element breath
he's like the dragon equivalent of one of these:
---
any small inconvenience: exists
Arthur:Â
also asdfkl sure lots of downsides but we are forgetting CUDDLE THE BAES (AT THE SAME TIME) POTENTIAL
---
lance is full wyvern (since he was brother to art's mom, while Arthur's dad was a wyrm)
---
he likes to soak in his pool (nice rockscaping type deal like a good boa enclosure) with just the snoot poking out
with the tongue occasionally
doin the blelele thing
---
guess who just snapped out of bed to write part of a whole symposium on Arthur's human form in the mythology au.
not that i need a reason in order to have a physically disabled/wheelchair using character, but i thought the logistics would work really well?
so imma ramble. a lot. because worldbuilding is my jam
so basic premise of this aspect is that many creatures, if they aren't already, develop human/humanoid forms through various methods of magic because it made it a lot easier for most* societies to accommodate for just one main range of body type.
*very much not all. especially throughout history, different regions catered to the local populus (centaur herds, merperson cities), or was just a mish mash of differently constructed styles for more mixed societies (like fae villages). but just like English was spread across much of the world (for better or worse, considering how it was done) most main or central areas of modern society now cater mostly or exclusively to the one humanoid body shape.
so dragons, but specifically Arthur's parents in this case, show the two most common body plan of the various dragon types, 4 and 6 limbs for mother and father respectively.
for 4 limbed (1 wing set, 1 leg set), the wings are used to interact with objects and serve as hands, so they map to the human form's arms. their single set of legs map to the human legs for the same reason.
meanwhile the 6 limbed (1 wing set, 2 leg sets) varieties use their front legs as hands, while wings act as their own set of limbs if the human form has them.
(4 limbed dragons with only legs and no wings map the same, minus the wings since, well, they don't have them :p)
Arthur meanwhile, despite being 4 limbed, uses his front/only legs as hands while his wings are auxiliary limbs since they are small and not conducive to movement. he doesn't have any limbs to mirror the use of a human's legs, so while he changes shape the magic makes the "default" form with legs, but there's nothing to actually map to those limbs.
in universe, merpeople are similar, in that if they bother with human forms their tails don't transfer to legs and thus wheelchair and mobility aids aren't as stigmatized as they are irl. difference being they'd need an aid to move on land regardless, while Arthur is perfectly capable and comfortable moving as a dragon, and the chair restricts his movement in that sense. but growing up he was required to use a human shape for school, and even if he does change to get around better he's still got to keep track of and drag around the chair in the interim. so at home and as he gets older and can go more places where a human form isn't required, even if helpful, he goes around "beast" much more than most other people. especially hanging out with his friends at their houses. (if it's like a sleepover and going out to a movie he'll bring it along since the theater (and just cars in general too) doesn't accommodate his dragon self, but he can chill with them and leave it out of the way somewhere which he can't do just going around in public.
his dragon body isn't the most conducive to graceful movement, but it's his body and he's had it his whole life so yeah. he can get around perfectly fine in the chair too, using it isn't some horrible, arduous task he dreads or anything like that. it's very much an "eyeroll, yeah yeah okay" and not "oh no fuck i hate it" even if it can get annoying dragging it around sometimes (like with basically any aid i think, though itâs mostly just a nonissue to even think about)
#mystery skulls#msa#arthur kingsmen#mystery skulls animated#dragon!arthur#mine#mythological au#answrs writes#answrs does aus#answrs writes headcanons#answrs draws
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Things You Shouldnât Say to Chronically ill/Disabled People
Donât Ask âAre You STILL Not Well?â Our conditions are âchronicâ This means they are possibly never going to heal. After a few years you should catch on to this
Donât Tell Us About Your Miracle Cure Yes we know about magnesium, crystals, epsom salts, and yoga. We are eating a balanced diet, we might even meditate regularly. The fact that we are still ill doesnât mean we havenât tried it. The fact that we havenât chased after every suggestion doesnât mean that is the one thing keeping us unhealthy... we get a LOT of these. A LOT
Donât Get Angry When We Say Weâve Tried Everything You Think Of We are not dismissing you and your value. We are not being smarmy or trying to throw a pity party for ourselves. We have been researching this condition for years now. Donât feel so shocked that weâve already considered every idea youâve come up with in 5 minutes!
Donât Tell Us About How Weak Our Generation is and How Back In Your Day You Just Fought Forward and Pretended it Wasnât There 1) You are NOT chronically ill. Your problems and my âproblemsâ are my ânormalâ 2) Is being stupid and self destructive really something worth bragging about or emulating?
Donât Tell us About Your Auntâs Cousinâs Nephewâs Friend Who Has Our Condition and Still Does The Things We Donât These conditions have a VERY broad range to them. Some people will have them and live totally normal lives. Some people will struggle with them. Some people will consider even what I do amazing freedom and strength. The fact that the people you know who have this condition are doing things is probably because they are the only ones who are able to be in the places you go. Trust me, Iâve read the statistics. Majority of us are not able to do what we are not able to do.
Donât Ask Us When We Are Going to Get Past This or be Done Making a Big Deal About This Believe me, it is a full time job as a chronically ill/chronically injured person to not blame ourselves. We donât need you reminding us what a burden weâre being or telling us we could totally get past this if we just tried. We are trying. And we do get that youâre tired of worrying about our issues. We are too. But unlike you, you can walk away and not notice it anymore. We have to live with this every waking minute. We canât run away from this because this is us. This is our reality
Ways You SHOULD Talk To Chronically ill/Chronically Injured People
Just Talk to Us Seriously. Just have a light conversation with us. It is stinking lonely going through this and we are always thankful for a distraction. Talk to us about what interests you. Talk to us about if you think whales burp through their blowholes. Talk to us about anything!
If We Canât Stand Then Sit To Talk to Us This isnât a demand, but if you want to put us more at ease, it really does help. It is something I myself didnât realize until I lost my ability to stand for long periods of time. People like to stand while talking. More to the point, they like to stand FAR away from anything you can sit on. Even if you are sitting, people like to stand to talk to you, and trust me. It is both daunting and kind of awkward talking to peopleâs crotches as they tower over you. If we are sitting down, it doesnât mean you need to walk away because we are done talking to you. It means we needed to sit down. Sit down with us. Itâs relaxing. Weâll talk for hours not distracted so much by our increasing pain and trying to awkwardly stand as long as we are sitting.
Talk About Things Other Than How Hard Our Lives Must Be Itâs not like we are completely against it. I notice other people walking with cool looking canes and want to ask them where they got them (cane envy as I like to call it). This is a huge part of our lives and we canât avoid talking about it entirely because it does take up our schedules, choices, and more. But we are more than our suffering as well. We like to talk about movies, games, books, some even like to talk about sports! I mean thereâs a whole Paralympics thing! (Though not me... Donât talk to me about sports. Iâll have literally no idea what on earth youâre talking about)
Roll With It If you ask if we want to go to a museum with you, and we reply âOh Iâd love to, unfortunately I canât stand that long.â or âUnfortunately I get my nerve blocks at that time so Iâll be out of it for the day.â Donât solemnly go âOh....â and then sit their awkwardly thinking how you just ruined the mood. The fact that we casually mentioned something like that usually means we are feeling comfortable with you. To us this isnât a trigger point, it is literally just our weekly schedule. Itâs almost the same as saying âOh I canât, I play golf Saturday mornings!â Just suggest another date. Or another activity. Ask us if we have anything you might like to try. Just keep the conversation going!
Basically... Just Treat Us Like Friends We have to deal with stuff you may not understand. We may have to make accommodations you donât think of. But we are still people. We donât expect you to know everything we go through, or have the cure we havenât thought of... We just want someone to connect with and have a pleasant conversation with! Just be you!
#chronic fatigue#chronic pain#chronic illness#chronically ill#chronic injury#fibromyalgia#NASH#tourettes#Hypermobility#social skills 101
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Jimin: âIâm the kind of person who likes to be lovedâ
When heâs talking, Jimin often starts his sentence with phrases like, âI just,â âit just,â âthey just âŠâ But then he immediately goes on to open up about his feelings, always providing a sincere response.
On one V-LIVE session back in October, you wore the clothes that you had planned to wear at the airport if you were to go on tour. Jimin: I hadnât really noticed, but I think Iâve finally come to terms with the reality of our present situation.
By âsituation,â you mean how itâs difficult to meet your fans in person? Jimin: Yes. If we had to go on stage in this situation, or if we had to perform our songs, Iâm not sure how we would go about accomplishing that. At the same time, It felt like something that was closed up and blocked was opened up again. There isnât the kind of excitement we got from tour season, though, so itâs easy to feel worn out. But, just like when weâre making new songs, I try to do whatever I can.
BE feels like itâs all about taking care of your feelings and the process of moving forward. Jimin: I had the role of listening to what the members wanted to include in the album, but itâs more a record of the present than it is about our individual feelings. We talked openly about how weâre having a hard time and how weâre trying our best to get over things, and that became the album.
As the project manager for BE, how did you go about gathering and organizing all the membersâ ideas? Jimin: I became the project manager because Yoongi recommended I do it, but I didnât think I had to lead anything along, more just make sure the other members could do their work quickly and easily. Usually that meant asking about their opinions, or passing opinions back and forth with our company. So I would collect ideas, organize them, say, âThese are some of the ideas we got back. What do you think?ââask them again, if they said okay, pass it on to the company, and if they made a song, I sent that over, too.
How did you prod along the members who were taking too long with their ideas? (laughs) Jimin: I would mention them by name in our group chat, and that got them to reply. (laughs) Any time I said someone or other didnât submit their idea yet, all the others would chime in with, âHurry up, guys!â and then theyâd give it to me.
Sounds like itâs great for one of the members to be project manager. (laughs) How did you accommodate all the different ideas? Jimin: When we first started, we sat down for about an hour and said: If you feel downtrodden, just make a song about feeling desperate; if you want to give others hope, go ahead and write a hopeful song. Letâs find the topic and work from there. And since thereâs seven of us, and the albumâs going to be about current events, letâs put in one skit to make seven songs; and letâs not put in any solo songs. Letâs make something that we can all work on together.
That approach must have been different from the way you worked on your other recent albums. Jimin: We never said anything like, somebody will make this song and someone else will make that song. We would just take a song and say, Who wants to do this? Who wants to do that? I became more ambitious, and wanted the other members to recognize the work I was doing. And because it was so fun working together, any time I made something, I wanted to play it for them right away. I also loved when they gave me compliments, so that added to the fun. When the songs are eventually finished, we hoped the fans would be able to pick up on all those emotions exactly as we felt them, although there are some songs that didnât make the cut. (laughs) It was really fun.
You could say that, while itâs important to deliver songs to the fans, the process of creation itself is also important. Jimin: A little while ago, I learned something new about myself: Iâm the kind of person who likes to be loved. Looking back, I realized I do what I do not just for the work itself, but to be loved by my friends, family, the group, and fans. Itâs been really hard to hold onto those connections, but I felt a fullness once I was sure of that love and kept those relationships close. It was like getting something of my own.
Rather than simply being loved, is it actually a satisfaction arising from the effort involved and the deep sense of trust it builds? Jimin: I used to think more frequently about what I was getting from them than what I was doing for everyone else. Even if I donât strictly owe our fans or group members anything in return, I feel a deep and sincere appreciation for all the things they do for me. I also saw some people for who they really are, some people who donât really care about me. Rather than pushing those people away, I learned how to react less emotionally to them. Likewise, I was able to be more emotionally honest with people who are very considerate toward me.
Itâs become difficult to express those kinds of feelings to fans these days. The only choice, really, is to talk to them through your songs. What is your message this time? Jimin: Thereâs a message in every album and music video we make; but you donât have to understand the message, I just hope you enjoy listening and watching. Thatâs the first thing. I hope you really like the songs and videos I created while working to not become complacent, so I took great care and practiced a lot to present something perfect to you.
On that note, I think your singing and dancing are changing quite a bit. Your performances in âBlack Swanâ and âDynamiteâ are completely different, but perhaps because of your changed body silhouette, the feel of your dance has become more consistent. As a dancer, what is it you want to express? Jimin: I just hope my emotions come across. I just want the emotions I put into my dancing, actions, and singing to be felt. So I got a lot of feedback, asked around, did some research and found that for each emotion you might express on stage, thereâs a body most appropriate for the job. We all have different body types. In order to get the body that can best express my emotions at my age, I went on a strict diet, but I donât stick to it nearly as intensely as I used to. (laughs)
If you watch your dance in âDynamite,â your body, especially when you turn away, looks different from before. You look lighter. What effect did your new body have on your dance moves? Jimin: I look how I want to look when Iâm around 58 kg, so I went on a diet and lost 5 kg. Thatâs when I found the look I wanted to present to everyone. I canât be objective about myself, but there was a certain vibe that I wanted. In the past I tried really hard to be no-frills, and by focusing less on trying something new and more on avoiding mistakes, I prevented myself from advancing any further. But in âDynamite,â I tried out expressions Iâd never tried before. I wanted people to be able to tell that I was really concentrating on this when they watched the video, so for this song, I tried to be sentimental andâhow should I put thisâI even tried to look suave (laughs) and funny, too . I ended up focusing on painting a single picture rather than on each of the individual elements.
And what is it you wanted to show off? Jimin: We havenât been able to put on a real show during COVID-19. I wanted to show that we didnât waste all that time but rather have kept going through it all, that we keep working hard. But portraying âworking hardâ through dance would look really tiring, so I smiled and danced throughout filming âDynamite.â
How was that possible? It couldnât have been easy to keep the whole team motivated. Jimin: With the spread of COVID-19, it took us a while to really believe our rise to the top of the Billboard Hot 100. When we checked our phones and it said we got first place we were amazed, but it was hard to believe, although we were all crying. (laughs) But when COVID-19 first hit, we said, âAh, itâll pass quickly and weâll be right back on tour.â The reason was that we had said, even if it gets tough, letâs give it our all for the next year. Give it our all and collapse.. That was the plan, but we were really disappointed. What was worse was, when I heard it would be hard to have any performances this year, my head ⊠it sort of went blank. My mind was empty. We couldnât just take a break either. Other people had it really hard but we could keep working. I didnât know whether we should be happy or sad about it. There were no answers for anything. It was really tough.
How did you get over that? Jimin: If an interviewer or anyone else asked me what my goal was, I told them my goal is to perform with the members for a long time, and that is probably my biggest goal; but I was really saying that to the group: I want to be with you guys for a really long time. I think we conveyed that feeling well to one another. I seriously worried a lot that the group would get exhausted. But theyâd be laughing with one another, cheering each other up. We had a lot more time to chat together, so whatever was going on, we could always talk about it over a drink at our home and work it out.
What makes you take your work so seriously? Jimin: I really want to love this job inside and out. If we just look at work as work, all weâll be after is money, but I never once thought that our groupâs dynamic, or the relationship we have with our fans, was based on that. But I think if youâre exhausted mentally and physically, the work becomes a chore, and then your relationships will inevitably suffer. Thatâs what I was afraid of.
The song âDis-easeâ is about how each member feels about working. How do you feel about your work? Jimin: I donât consider my main profession, performing and singing, âgoing to work.â. But when Iâm doing something else with the camera right in front of me,that feels like âwork.â Singing and performing for our fans isnât workâitâs something I really, really want to do.
You helped write âDis-ease,â correct? Jimin: The bridge. I was recording with Pdogg and there was one part that didnât have a melody, soâshould I call it improv?âI was just singing something without thinking about it, and then he asked me to sing that again. So I asked if he was sure, and then he asked me to write the melody, so I ended up writing it.
Some of the other songs on BE have something like that too, but âDis-easeâ somehow feels particularly like old school Korean hip hop. Jimin: I thought so too. I thought of 20 years ago when I sang it. The majority of the song was written by j-hope, so that might just be my thinking (laughs) but I sang it when there was a question mark on who would sing the vocals. I was really doing whatever I wanted, so I sort of had to be restrained (laughs) but it was fun.
Was there any place the vocals changed while recording? There are a lot of parts on BE where you use almost a normal speaking voice. Jimin: I usually already have the big picture set in my mind when I sing, but this time it wasnât like that. âLife Goes On,â especiallyâthat songâs not about me, but I couldnât help but empathize with it, so right from the beginning I performed it without having to think about how my voice should sound. I wasnât thinking about some particular emotion of mine I wanted to express to you. I just recorded exactly the feelings I had as I sang.
Thereâs a song titled, âTelepathy.â When you streamed yourselves in production on YouTube, the group mentioned the idea of telepathy which made me think you were sending the song directly to your fans. If you could talk to them through telepathy, what would you say? Jimin: People have kind hearts, and I just hope they donât let that go. You asked about telepathy, but I think we really do have a telepathic connection with our fans. Itâs not crystal clear or anything, but I think if weâre sincere then they can feel it somehow. I think thatâs why our fans support us and are always by our side.
And what about the other way around? What would you like to hear from your fans? Jimin: One thing Iâm always curious about, about our fans, is whatâs the hardest thing in their lives. What each of them is struggling with, whatâs making them happyâIâm really curious to know. We face our own difficulties as well, so I always wonder if thereâs someone in each of our fansâ lives to ask them if theyâre doing okay. I hope things get better soon, that people can keep holding on, and that the adults will follow all the rules. Kids donât have a lot of options right now to do the things they want to do. I imagine a lot of kids see this as something thatâs being forced upon them by adults, so I hope the grown-ups will properly explain the situation to the kids so they can help each other too, to end the pandemic.
The news is saying that theyâve made a COVID-19 vaccine, so you might be able to meet your fans sooner than later. What are you going to say to them when you finally see them again? Jimin: I donât think weâll say anything. I think weâll just look at each other for a very long time. And if Iâm able to say anything, Iâll probably say, âYou made it. Now letâs get back to having a good time.â
© sourceÂ
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[I Know]
. five : two and a possible
four
I finished up my âmorningâ routine and walked back over to sit next to him, finally ready to eat something. âI'm hungry. What we having?â
âOh shit!âÂ
âWhat?â
âI forgot to get food.â
I tilted my head, my features overtaken by displeasure. âYouâve been eating hella takeout, huh? You know thatâs not good.â Weâd had this conversation a couple times before. He was generally a healthy guy, but his diet could be so trash at times.Â
âI mean, I was. But Iâve been at my momâs house eating Thanksgiving leftovers the past few days.â
I snorted. âYou are such a man,â I playfully huffed, shaking my head.
âIâma do better,â he mumbled listlessly with a laugh. âYou can order something, though. Iâll pick some stuff up tomorrow after my last meeting.â
âOk. We can just get pizza. That cool?â
âYeah. â
âYou got dessert at least?â
He stared at the wall in deep thought, his mouth doubtfully agape. â âŠI think I have ice cream?â
âOk.â I left my seat with the kitchen in mind solely because of the obvious lack of confidence he had just displayed. âCome look with me.â Â
âWhat?â The presence of a frown was more than apparent on his face.  Â
âCome with me,â I insisted, unfazed.Â
âFor what? You arenât a guest anymore.â
âI am, too.â Now I was frowning.Â
âNo, you're not. You know where the kitchen is, the pantry, the fridge; you know where everything is,â he listed candidly, but stood to his feet anyway. Â
âSo. You don't have to be rude.â I rolled my eyes, turning to walk out with him in tow. Iâd had to hide the smile trying to creep onto my face. I loved messing with him.Â
He smacked his lips, clearly agitated, and I couldn't hold my laughs. âIâm coming, woman.â
We stepped into his kitchen and I pulled the freezer drawer open, searching for the ice cream I had sort of been promised? Curious, I paused to look in the refrigerator. Other than a few bottles of water, a carton of eggs, a couple carryout plates and various condiments, there wasnât much inside. âDamn, you weren't lying. Ainât shit in here.â
âI told you.â
I laughed as I closed the doors and went back to the freezer. I moved a bag of broccoli to the side, then a bag of pineapple chunks. âFound it,â I gleefully announced, lifting the pint of vanilla Haagen Dazs. I removed the top and the seal was still there. Perfect. I turned to show him just as he was coming out of the pantry.
âHereâs some stuff my sister had.â He held up a box of fudge brownie mix in one hand and an unopened bottle of vegetable oil in the other.Â
âOh, hell yeah,â I approved with a satisfied nod, before putting the ice cream away. That was right up my alley.
He chuckled, shaking his head, as he sat them both on the counter. I walked over and slid them closer to me. âI swear you a junkie.â
âGlucose gang âtil I die, cuz.â
âYou banginâ sugar?â I looked up at him and we fell out almost immediately. I leaned over onto the marble in front of me, cracking all the way up while he stood beside me doing the same. âYou got a problem.â
âNah, thatâs why Iâm so sweet.â I winked and stuck my tongue out before laughing a little harder. He just grinned at me, his eyes slightly narrowed. âNow, go order the pizza,â I snappily instructed, waving him off and pulling out one of the chairs at the island.
âThat wasn't sweet at all.â
I took a seat and pompously crossed my legs, clutching my knee with laced hands and being sure to keep my eyes away from him, even as I spoke. âThis is just payback for making me spend the day by myself tomorrow.âÂ
He smacked his lips. âGirl, hush.â He was so serious I couldn't help but laugh, but also donât be telling me to hush. He went to leave and I reached out to push him. The joke was on me, though, because he had gotten too far. All I had done was push air and almost fallen out of my chair. âLook at you. So sweet I donât know what Iâma do with you.âÂ
I snorted. âShut up.â
âYou feel like baking for real, though? I need one of them fire ass strawberry cheesecakes.â
âI got you, babe. You know I always feel like baking.â
âBet. Text me a list so I can get the stuff tomorrow.â
âOk.â
He came back with his laptop and credit card, settling in the seat next to mine. Normally this part would take a while, because one of usâmeâwould have a time trying to figure out what they wanted. But that wasnât the case today. I was starving and my pizza order didn't usually get too complicated anyway. I quickly decided on pepperoni and green peppers, and he went with chicken and spinach. I couldn't wait to eat some of mine and his.Â
âSo⊠how has it been? How are you?â
I shrugged my shoulder, taking my focus to my hands down on the counter. I really didn't want to talk about this. Honestly, it was the furthest thing from my mind. But I knew he was probably worried. ââŠOk, I guess. Iâve been good.â
âHave things gotten any better? Be honest.âÂ
I looked up, seeing the care and concern that I always saw in his eyes. And that shit made it extremely hard for me to lie to him. I wasnât a good liar either. So, I shook my head. It had actually gotten much worse since the last time he and I saw each other. But, that part, I had to keep to myself. âNot really. Just the same olâ, same olâ.âÂ
His gaze never left me, but he didnât speak another word. Probably just didnât have anything to say. I could definitely understand.
At this point my only concern was her wellbeing. I couldn't give anymore advice, because I had long tapped out. It had all been falling on deaf ears anyway. Weâd known each other for about a year and a half now, and nothing had changed. I didn't mean to judge her, but she seemed content just where she was. Content with disarray. In my eyes, her reasons for staying were bullshit. Because love damn sure wasn't keeping her. Love wouldn't be doing half the shit she was enduring. It certainly wouldn't have her going into another manâs home just to get away.Â
Nah.
Love is what had me making accommodations every sixty days for a woman who wasn't mine. Itâs what had me turning down the advances of other women when I didn't have to. Itâs the five hundred dollar mixer and numerous other baking supplies in my kitchen that I don't even use. Itâs what kept me up at night asking myself what the fuck I was doing, and actually attempting to justify it. Love is me throwing everything reasonable, and everything sensible, and everything rational, and everything logical out the window when I knew better.
I felt like it was time for me to make a choice. For my own good if nothing else. Without question, things just weren't gonna work themselves out. I needed to start using my better judgment. It was on me, because she wasn't moving. I needed to take myself out of the picture. I knew this, but it was hard as hell to even think about. A sign from God is what I really needed. Soon. Because I felt that my next move was about to be a mistake no matter what. I hated to admit it, but I was getting tired of going to pick her up every time that ungrateful ass nigga left, having so much fun with her, and then taking her back to him. I wanted her. So fucking bad. And I knew the feeling was mutual. But being on the sidelines of her life was slowly breaking me. I had to accept that whatever I was to her now was likely all I would ever be. Equally, I couldn't stand seeing her allow someone to treat her so poorly when she was worth so much more. I just wish that I had been able to make her understand that. I wish all of it could've gone differently.Â
âSo, what you been up to?â she quietly asked, breaking the silence.
âNot much. Just working, the occasional event, linking with my boys. You know, the usual.â
âAny new possibles?â She couldn't even get it out before her lips started to form a grin. This was what she had really meant by her previous question. She always found a way to work it into the conversation. And each time was less cunning than the last, even though she was for sure trying to be slick.Â
âOh, of course.â
âEwww,â she drawled, simultaneously smiling and scrunching her face in disgust. I chuckled.Â
âWhat?â
ââOh, of courseâ!â
I dropped my head, laughing at her exaggerated imitation of me. I did not sound like that. âI'm just saying. Women love the king.â
âOooh. You weren't this cocky the last time I saw you,â I teased lightheartedly, clutching my imaginary pearls. He was so tickled.
âIâm joking.â
âNah, you're serious.â
âI know what I bring to the table, but I'm not over feeling myself.â
âI hear you, homie.â
He cut his eyes at me as I kept up my production of faux amazement. âYou get on my nerves so bad, Jay.â
I grabbed his shoulder and leaned over on him, laughing too hard. Yeah, I was picking, but I couldnât be mad. He was telling the truth. Women did indeed love his ass. Whenever we were out, I would catch them staring constantly. A couple of them had even had the gumption to approach him. But seeing him interact with the women who actually knew him, the women in his family, I could just feel it. They really loved him. His mom, his best friendâs mom, his little sister and a cousin were the ones Iâd had the opportunity to witness him in conversation with. The adoration was practically radiating from the screen during their Facetime calls. He even had an aunt who would send him care packages from time to time. I understood fully. I absolutely adored him myself. He just had this light about himself and it was fiercely captivating. Even if Iâd wanted to let go, I don't believe I could. His place in my heart had been solidified. I couldn't imagine my life without Omari. I didn't even like to think of the possibility.Â
âSo, these possibles,â I continued, a smile still lingering. âIs there looove in the air?âÂ
âNah.â He reclined in his seat and propped his elbow on the back. In a matter of seconds, all enthusiasm had left his body. âIâm not really on that right now.â
I frowned. He wasn't usually so dry with me. âDid something happen?âÂ
âNah, not really.â
âSo, whatâs up? You don't have your eye on anybody?â I found that very hard to believe.Â
âI meanâŠâ The sly smirk that made its way onto his face caused me to drop my concern like a hot potato. I knew he was holding out.Â
âMhmm. Spill, bruh.â
He reached up to rub the back of his neck, laughing a little as he leaned toward the island again. âI didn't say that, I just been chillinâ.â
âNah, somethingâs going on. We tell each other everything, now cat got your tongue.âÂ
âItâs not even like that. To be completely honest with you, it just feels like nobody is genuine anymore. Now, these women either just out here on the come up or they're only interested for superficial reasons. They donât really like you. I canât mess with none of that.â
âWell, I can definitely understand not being able to trust.â
âYou know? Itâs hard. And I do want that special something with someone, someone I can do life with, but I don't know. Risking your heart like that is justâŠâÂ
âYeah. I get it.â
âSo, yeah. Thatâs all it is.â
âMaybe you can start looking in some different places than usual. Where you be?â
âI'm not looking for anything currently.â
âWhy do you sound so sad when you say that, though?âÂ
He glanced over at me and laughed, but I didn't return his supposed joy. I canât lie, it was a bit troubling. We had spoken on this kind of stuff before, but he had never seemed so affected by it. âIâm not sad. Iâm good, I promise.â
âOk, so what qualities would your ideal lady have?â I switched to a lighter, more giddy tone, in hopes of making his mood follow.Â
âReally?â
âYeah, I wanna know. Maybe I can help you out a lil bit.â
#original fiction#original characters#black characters#black fiction#black fic#black writer#black reader#i know#SheaButtahWrites
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What a Sleepover
Okay, so I may or may not be plotting some headcannons for Zuko đđ
BUT, in the meantime- I must push this fic out because I've been thinking of it for a while!
Also, small psa. Just because two dudes are having a sleepover, hugging, holding hands etc. does not mean they're into each other, or gay. Same goes for females, we all just need affection sometimes and shouldn't have to be dating to do so!
Summary: Karma and Nagisa are having a sleepover because that's what best friends do :)
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It was the last class before a well deserved free day. Well, it feels very well deserved.
It was a rough week of extra training not to mention crammed-in study sessions for the following tests. Finally, about ten minutes until school's was done for.
Nagisa was just bouncing his leg in excitement, especially because he is going to go home with Karma.
It wasn't very often they got to hang out anymore, so he was going to take this sleepover and enjoy it. And everything else can go shove it.
So yeah, Nagisa was quite excited. It was a time to just be stress-free. Not just from the normal teenage stress, but the stress placed on their shoulders about the end of the world.
So, when the bell finally rung, it took every bit of will power not to whoop. Instead, he said his goodbyes to Kaede like the gentlemen he is.
He then, packed his things, walking towards Karma's desk.
"You ready to go?" He asked.
"Yeah, give me one second." Karma replied, pulling his back over his shoulder. "Okay, you won't mind if we stop by the store real quick? I want to pick out a few things before we head to my house."
"Yeah, we can go." Nagisa said as they began to walk out the door together. "What are you gonna get?"
"Just some snacks, I don't know. If you see something you like, tell me."
Nagisa just nodded as they continued to their journey to the store. It was mostly accompanied by silence, but it was nice silence. Just listening to some music they've recently found with the occasional bob to the beat.
Once they finally made it to the store, Nagisa just followed behind Karma.
"You cooking tonight?" Nagisa asked seeing Karma picking out some beef.
"Yeah, I was planning on making some beef curry. Unless you wanna order."
"Nah, I always prefer your cooking."
"Damn right."
They got to the isle filled with snacks, Karma just let Nagisa pick out a few.
"Imagine if your parents were here." Nagisa mentioned making the other snort.
"God, they'd lose their shit. I mean sure they're gone but they're... something." Karma huffed, shaking his head.
Nagisa could remember the first time he met Karma's family, it was strange to say at the least. They were putting Karma on a strict diet, despite the fact that he was already skinny. It was just strange.
"Has it ever bothered you?" Nagisa asked suddenly.
"Huh?"
"Uh, I mean, them being gone all the time. Does it bother you? Like don't you get lonely sometimes?"
"Not really, it's weird. I don't miss them if that's what you're asking."
"When was the last time they were here?"
"Uh, shit I dunno. A little before I was suspended last year."
"Shit."
"Oh don't worry, it's freeing if anything. It's nice. I'm not a people person."
"I know, I know. But still."
"How about, worry about yourself and your own jackass of a mother." Karma said lightly punching Nagisa's head.
He always does that.
"Well, welcome to my humble abode. You already know where everything is and whatnot. Do me a favor, set something up to watch while I make dinner, will ya?"
"You got it chef Karma." Nagisa soluted then retreated to the living room getting something to watch.
Long story short, Karma finished cooking, they ate it and it was absolutely delicious.
Like what couldn't he do?
They then watched some fun stuff, did whatever they felt like until they set up camp in the living room. Aka, Karma getting blankets and pillows, and for them to wrestle who got the couch and floor.
Then they just talked, talked about some woke shit, but not really woke shit ya know?
"Terasaka's a bitch." Karma blurted.
"You're an even bigger bitch." Nagisa retorted, snorting at the random statement.
"Hey, at least I take pride into it."
Nagisa just changed his position slightly by resting his head on Karma's stomach (they're resting like a T) Hey, bromance. It was normal, Karma wasn't very touchy feely but Nagisa was and Karma had to accommodate. Basically, Karma didn't have a say but he didn't really care. It was nice having someone trust him like that.
"This year is crazy." Nagisa said just staring into the ceiling.
"And it's not gonna be any less crazy any time soon."
"You think we're actually going to kill him?"
"Depends."
"On?"
"On how sappy everyone gets."
"But we have to."
"There could always be another way. It always bothered me when Koro Sensei said that he blew up the moon and will to the earth. What is stopping him? He could've done it a long time ago when even the higher ups can't do shit. How come he's now giving us -fucking students of all people- a deadline. He could take us all out as easily as a blink of an eye, what it stopping him?"
"Should we ask him?" Nagisa asked, making Karma bark out a laugh.
"Absolutely the fuck not."
Nagisa just hummed in response. Karma then just sighed obnoxiously.
"I'm bored."
"What do you wanna do?"
"I dunno."
"You don't know?"
"Nope, entertain me."
"By...?"
"Wearing one of my mom's dresses."
"Fuck no!" Nagisa yelped, sitting up.
"What? It'd just be you in your final form."
"You're an ass."
"Ouch, I'm truly hurt. You've wounded me deeply Nagisa!" Karma said clutching his heart, turning to his side covering his head with a pillow. "Just leave me here wounded to such painful words you've set upon me."
Nagisa just scoffed, poking his side making him yelp sitting up quickly.
"Oi!" He pouted.
"What?" Nagisa asked pretending to be concerned.
"And you're calling me an ass?"
"You wanna see this 'ass'."
"Not really, I can already smell it." He snickered.
"Oh yeah?" Nagisa said putting his hands up. Karma catches them pushing them away from him.
"Nagisa, I will rock your shit."
"Yeah? And I can do the same."
"Sure thing pipsqueak."
"You'll apologies for that."
"Will I?" Karma said pretending to think for a few seconds, "I don't think so."
"You're so gonna get it."
"Yeah, whatcha gonna do about it?"
Nagisa then quickly let go of Karma's hands, tweaking his sides.
"Hey!" He yelped, "That's cheating!"
"How so, modern problems call for modern solutions."
"You did not just say that-" He cut himself off as he saw Nagisa snake his hands towards him. "Okay, we're not gonna do that!" He said pushing Nagisa's arms away from him.
"Why not?" Nagisa snickered, "Is it because little Karma's too ticklish?"
"Nagisa, shut the fuck up." He fumed, his face starting to get red.
"Awwe this is adorable." Nagisa was loving this, after all those times Karma embarrassed him to no end.
"Fuck oHOFF!" He yelped as Nagisa quickly started to squeeze his sides.
Did he fuck off? Nope. If anything, he continued to squeeze his sides. This made Karma fall not so gracefully onto his back. he was slapping and swatting his arms aimlessly at Nagisa, pulling at his hands trying desperately to pull him off.
"STOHOHOP NAGISA!" He screeched, laughing loudly and uncontrollably. He was squirming around as much as he could, trying to buck Nagisa off but the boy was determined.
"What's wrong? I thought you were said you were gonna 'rock my shit'." Nagisa teased. It was hilarious how easy it was to tease Karma.
The redhead was trying. Key word: trying, to retaliate by jabbing his fingers at Nagisa's ribs. Only reason it didn't work was because it actually hurt a bit. Thank god for Karma losing all sense of control when being tickled.
"Oh yeah? Do you think you're in any position to try that?" Nagisa asked, snaking his hands to the hollows of Karma's underarms.
He squealed, arching his back, elbows locked to his sides and laughter reducing slightly to giggles. It's his least ticklish spot, but it still keeps him going strong. He was able to spout out a string of curses and demands of stopping to Nagisa, but all fruitless.
This however, gave Nagisa full access to the spot he knows kills Karma: stomach.
As soon as his hands had even made contact to his shaking abdomen, Karma screeched.
"NOHODON'TPLEAHAHAHA-" He pleaded. He was trying his best to throw the smaller boy off him. However, it was deeming incredibly difficult with the unbearable sensations that spreaded all throughout his stomach. Nagisa made sure to squeeze every bit of his midsection before briefly traveling to his ribs.
He drilled his fingers between his bones without mercy.
"Are you going to apologize for calling me a pipsqueak?" Nagisa asked digging at his stomach again, making him squeal with every vibrating movement.
He knew that Karma could barely speak a proper sentence, but this was very fun.
What was more fun was seeing a bit of skin from his shirt that rode up from all the rustling. Nagisa tried to grab his hands with one hand, not very successful but better then not trying. His other went under Karma's shirt clawing at his twitching stomach making his laugh come out more panicked.
"Sorry, I can't really hear you." Nagisa grinned, vibrating his hand right around his navel making Karma nearly jump out his skin. His laughter went in and out of being silent. Nagisa felt bad and relented his attack.
The redhead in turn was panting out a few giggles holding his midsection.
"Gohod, you're such a dick."
"Meh, maybe. But you deserved it you mega dick."
"Whatever." He waved off Nagisa, sitting up. He turned his head to the blue boy. "You know I'm gonna get you back."
Nagisa just sighed pumping the air deflated, "Worth it."
"Well, I'm getting snacks and you aren't having shit."
"Why must you be so cruel?" Nagisa sobbed. Karma just chuckled walking to the kitchen.
Karma although wasn't a big fan of getting tickled the shit out of him, it was nice to let loose every once in a while. If course he isn't going to say that though.
#ticklish!karma#tickle fic#tickle fluff#nagisa shiota#karma akabane#assassination classroom#brotp#idk sounds nice#this is fun tho#fun times#sleepover#friends#frienship#slight angst#but not really#enjoy#â€ïž
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ABIONA AU- PART 9
Pairing: Tâ Challa x Black!Reader
Warning(s): None
Link to ABIONA by @aloevverified
Link to Face claims (2)
Previous Chapter: interlude Part 8
Part 9
TâChalla took a spoonful of ice cream in his bowl as he happily watched Abiona move around the living room with her toys and pacifier in her mouth. Her first birthday was right around the corner and he couldnât believe how fast time had gone. It felt just like yesterday when he was rushing to the hospital to watch his princess come into the world and steal his heart completely. Now here she was walking about causing havoc to her mother's decorations around their home. The little girl stopped playing with her blocks and came over to her Baba and took out her pacifier signalling for him to give her some ice cream.
âI am sorry, beautiful. I canât, your mama said I need to stop giving you sugar before bed.â The little girl didnât budge instead she started babbling as she held on to her Babaâs legs. TâChalla looked over his shoulder to make sure he could still hear Alix on the phone with her mother.
âFine, but just a little. And donât tell anyoneâ he said slipping the spoon into her mouth. Alix came to join them just as Abiona went back to playing.
âMaman wanted to know which of her hats would be more suitable to blend in with Wakandan style so I just spent 20 minutes look at very similar hats.â She said joining TâChalla on the couch.
âIt is good she is excited to come. I have gotten David and AmĂ©lieâs accommodations sorted.
âThatâs good, Maman and Papa really miss Abiona and I am excited to get to catch up with AmĂ©lie,â Alix said leaning on his shoulder
âI cannot believe she is already turning one. This year flew by, and very soon she wonât be a baby anymoreâ
âYes, that way she will know how to wipe her mouth after Baba sneaks her ice cream after I said not toâ TâChalla closed his eyes to avoid Alixâs stare. âYou need to learn how to tell her no sometimes if not it will come back to bite you in the buttâ
âHow can I do that when I barely tell her mama no?â He replied by getting up to keep his bowl.
âThat is not my fault, it is the life choices you have decided to make,â Alix said, picking up the baby to get her ready for bed. TâChalla followed her into Abionaâs room making faces behind her causing the little princess to bounce and giggle at her fatherâs actions. Alix turned around and gave him a warning face that immediately made him stop.
âDid you talk to your father? Did he seem like he was looking forward to coming?â
âWell, he is happy to come see âOna and me if that is what you are wonderingâ She replied carrying the baby to the bathroom as she rubbed TâChallaâs arm passingly.
âI really donât know what I was expecting but I am hoping that his tolerance for me hasnât decreased since our time apartâ
âBabe, you will be fine. Just be the confident king you were at dinner and all should be well. Plus it is just Abionaâs first birthday so it isnât like anything else is happeningâ
âYou are right, except for my proposal to youâ Alix turned from the tub briefly to look at Tâchallaâs smiling face.
âIf you even dare I promise I will not only say no but I will leave you.â
âThat is so dramaticâ
âWhat is dramatic is proposing to a woman who doesnât plan to marry you at your daughterâs first birthday. âOna tell your Baba to not steal your shineâ
ââOna ask your mother if she will ever want to marry meâ Alix smiled quickly before allowing it to disappear as she took Abiona out of the tub and carried her back to her room with TâChalla on her tail.
ââOna tell your Baba that if I decide to marry, I will let him know. Until then he should stop pretending to ask me every couple of days.â
âDonât act like you donât enjoy itâ
âHavenât you heard of the boy who cried wolf?â
âYes, however, you keep saying no so I am hoping that the time I am serious you actually say yes,â he said placing his hands on her waist as she rubbed the lotion on the active baby who began to giggle at her parents' antics. The mixture of close contact and the topic of marriage made Alix flustered. Her periodic heartburn had returned and it was making her lose focus.
âTâChalla please leave me and Abiona alone. You know you distract her and youâre distracting me. She wonât sleep with her partner in crime here.â
âAlright, but this conversation isnât over,â He said kissing Alixâs cheek and taking Abiona from her hands, âGoodnight beautiful, I will see you tomorrow okay.â He handed the baby back and left Alix to her swarming thoughts. It is not like she didnât want to marry TâChalla at all. Marriage had just never been on her agenda, but neither was getting pregnant for a prince and following him back to his country. This was never supposed to be her life, and although she didnât hate it, in fact, she loved it, she just wanted to make sure she was still doing things to make her happy. Marrying him meant being introduced formally to the elders and the Wakandan people, it meant being queen and taking on the responsibilities around it. Although she would be TâChallaâs queen and the thought made her smile, she was not ready to give up so much of herself so quickly and with permanent effects.
Alix entered TâChallaâs study and observed him for a bit. There was also the issue of his duty to his country. Sometimes it felt like he was king first before anything else. She still wasnât sure how she felt about their family having to come second on many occasions. She went over and stood behind his chair and swung her hands over his shoulder and rested her head on his shoulder. TâChalla smiled and turned his head to kiss her cheek.
âAre you coming to bed or doing overtime as King?â
â Overtime.â Alix got off TâChalla and headed to the door.
âOkay, but if you change your mind you know where to find meâ Tâchalla laughed at her playful demeanour âGood night, I love youâ
âI love you too, one more thing though Alixâ She re-entered the door waiting for him to continue âDo you think possibly you could do me the honour of being my wife?â She rolled her eyes and exited before he could finish.
âYou are so full of it!â Tâchalla laughed knowing one day her reaction to his question would surely be a yes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alix waited enthusiastically for the jet to land on the platform so she could be reunited with her friend. She had missed her and was grateful for the few days before her parents came to have some well-deserved girl time. TâChalla had just made it from a council meeting as he came to stand beside Alix. He was glad to see her so happy, the move had not been too difficult but between the fighting in the beginning and the general adjustment of a new environment, TâChalla knew that Alix missed the comfort of her life in Paris and the friends and family that came with it. The jet slowly opened to reveal the couple and their baby. The two women started waving excitedly to each other until they finally were close enough to hug.
âIt is so good to see you! And look at Emmanuel, he is such a big boy now!â Alix said touching the 14-month-old babyâs cheek. He looked like he had just woken up and was trying to adjust to his surroundings.
âYou too! There is so much I want to tell you that a phone call wasnât enough to say! Where is Abiona?â
âShe is napping but should be up by the time you all come in. It is nice to see you again AmĂ©lie. David, how are you, man?â TâChalla said, giving his friend a hug.
âNever been better man, you look good. Very Kingly.â TâChalla laughed at his friend before leading everyone back into the palace.
After lunch and cooing at how much both the children had grown, The men decided to move their discussion to TâChallaâs office while the women and the babies stayed home to discuss. Alix brought over a bottle of wine and two glasses to the table for her and her friend.
â Actually no wine for meâ Alix gave AmĂ©lie a questioning face.
âI hope you arenât on some diet because I plan on taking you to all the restaurants the city has to offer. I know you arenât still breastfeeding so drink upâ said pouring herself some
âI want to but I canât, it isnât advisable for pregnant womenâ Alix lifted her eyes to meet AmĂ©lieâs as they shared a knowing look with both their faces breaking into a huge smile that was solidified by the hug that Alix gave her.
âCongratulations! I guess I will drink for the both of usâ Alix joked.
âThanks, we just started telling peopleâ
âHow far along are you?â
âFour months, so just out of the danger zoneâ
âWell, no wonder you havenât told anyone. I have been wondering because you hadnât told me anything I thought maybe you and David had decided to stop trying.â
âWell we were going to, but just as it was becoming too much, but you know what they say when you least expect it.â
âSo that's what? One year? And David wanted to waitâ
âI know, but after our experience with trying to conceive with Emmanuel, it seemed wrong to wait. â
âWell, I am happy for you. David better not tell TâChalla though, if not he is going to march in here talking about having more kids. He is relentless sometimes.â AmĂ©lie laughed.
âIs he still proposing every couple of daysâ Alix rolled her eyes.
âYes! He never stops. Sometimes I think he is serious and other times he is just being the clown he is.â The pair laughed as Alix briefly looked over at the two babies happily playing with Abionaâs toys.
âBut Alix, have you thought about it, like marrying him seriously?â
âI mean I have, but with him, it isnât that simple. I would be Queen. That is not something I had planned for myself. I am still getting used to the idea. I donât want to make any more life plans with him that I am not 100% sure about you know.â
âThat makes sense. However, I know that you spend too much time thinking about the logistics of this relationship instead of actually living it. The man has promised to always try and make the transition smooth. I know it is scary but you can only hope it works out, right?â
âYeah I guessâ Alix looked away
âYou guess? What? Is he working too much still?â
âNo, he makes sure he is here every night and keeps the late work to a minimum.â
âOkay, then what? Is it Buhle? Do you think he will go back to her? What does she look like because she may not be scared of you but the two of us together is differentâ Alix laughed
âOh my God no. Buhle is harmless. She sometimes oversteps but mostly that is because of how close they are. She has been sweet thus farâ
âSo you overreacted then, like with Tinaâ Alix looked offended as AmĂ©lie tried to hide her smile
â First of all, Buhle insulted me the first week like she didnât already know I was the mother of his child and made an already tense situation even more difficult.â
âAre you sure it wasnât because you were sexually frustratedâ AmĂ©lie slyly said
âNo! She overstepped and my soft-hearted man once again could not tell. I will admit that I may have exaggerated with Tina but I was heavily pregnant and trying to figure things out with my baby daddy. Life was not being kind to me.â AmĂ©lie giggled
âAlright, Alix. You never change do youâ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TâChalla refilled his friend's glass with some scotch laughing at the joke he had just told him.
â Not too much TâChalla. AmĂ©lie will get grumpy if she knows I got to drink and she canâtâ
âWhat do you mean? I am sure Alix has already opened her favourite wine. She hasnât let anybody touch it for weeks just for when you came.â
âWell, that is unfortunate because AmĂ©lie is pregnant so drinking is off-limits for a while.â Tâchallaâs eyes widened as David took a sip.
âYou are being seriousâ
âOf course why would I lieâ Tâchalla reached over and shook his shoulder.
âCongratulations man! That is good news! You are going to be a father of two. That is wild to think about.â
âYou're telling me. I wanted to wait but even this time took a lot out of us so it was smart for AmĂ©lie to suggest trying when we did. She knows her body best.â
âThat is really a blessing. Bast, I can barely come to terms that Abiona is one year old. I donât know where the year went. Let alone having another.â
âT, what are you talking about, you have been talking about having four children since Alix was pregnant. â
âI know, but I sometimes feel like I have to soak up all the time I have with my firstborn. You know these past few months werenât easy on Alix and me. I felt like I was wearing myself thin and I ended up taking it out on her.â
âYou guys are still fighting or?â
âNo, we worked things out, plus now she has made friends and does other things so she does not feel my absence as muchâ
âWhat about your new Tina. Wait or old Tina I should sayâ David laughed at his own joke as Tâchalla frowned.
âIf you are talking about Buhle, you should know that we are also fine and our relationship remains intact and she is friendly with the love of my life.â David shook his head.
âOnly you could end up in such a situation. Well no more kids for a while then yeah?â
âNo, if Alix somehow agreed to it and wanted another child tomorrow, I would be on board. However, I would rather marry her first before even thinking about more childrenâ
âIsnât Alix against marriageâ
ââAgainstâ seems harsh. But slowly I believe her heart will grow to it. I have been asking her jokingly and although her answer remains no that does not stop meâ
âNo one is shocked by any of that Tâ
âMake your jokes but I am serious. I am slowly warming her to the idea until she has no choice but to say yes or at least have a serious discussion about it.â
âThat all sounds nice but donât her parents hate youâ TâChalla sighed
â No, Estelle loves me, Tolu on the other hand is like a large bolt that is difficult to open. He believes I am some clown that has manipulated his child into wasting time with me. â
âSo how are you going to change that?â
âWell to begin, when they arrive for Abionaâs birthday, I hope to show him how good of a King I am as well as a father who is able to balance the two. And I will also be showing him this.â TâChalla reached into a secret compartment of his desk that could only be opened with his fingerprint and reached in to reveal a small box that he opened to display an engagement ring. David's mouth was left agape.
âI am hoping to ask for his daughterâs hand in marriage. Alix isnât ready yet, but this will give me enough time to convince Tolu and show him how serious I am so when she is I have all my ducks in a row. So you canât say anything to AmĂ©lieâ
âNo of course not. I am even shocked you have been able to keep it from Alix, especially with your word vomit.â
âIt has been difficult but somehow I don't mind waiting. Bast has made it apparent to me that she is one of the few things I can wait an eternity forâ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alix climbed into their bed and immediately went to lay on TâChalla who was consumed by a rerun of MTV Cribs. She had missed him today and was glad he didnât have to work late.
âI missed you todayâ
âReally?! Alixandre Ajayi missed meâ Alix rolled her eyes
â Haha very funny. And you wonder why I am not endearing with youâ TâChalla laughed and turned off the television. And wrapped his arm around her and kissed her hand.
âI am only kidding. I thought you would be consumed with chatting with AmĂ©lieâ
âI was, but I still missed just being with you for even an hour of the day.â
âI missed you too. Did you have a nice time though?â
âYes, it was good to just catch up. How about you and David. I see you broke out the scotch. How Jules hasnât found it yet beats meâ
âBecause I am good at hiding things, and youâre just jealous because AmĂ©lie left you to drink by yourselfâ
âWhat makes you so sure?â
âBecause David told me she was pregnantâ
âI was hoping he wouldnât tell you to give you any more ideas than the ones you have created for yourselfâ TâChalla smiled
âNo, it hasnât created any ideas. I am happy for them. And I happy with just you and my princessâ
âI am happy to hear thatâ Alix smiled as she made circles on his chest.
â Plus, right now my main goal is to marry you firstâ Alix groaned and got off him, turning her back to him as he laughed.
âLook how you ruined a perfectly good moment.â TâChalla turned to spoon her and she immediately reached for his arm to put around her.
âAre we ever going to have the conversation Alixandreâ She could tell he was serious so she carefully thought about her words.
âYes we are, and as soon as I feel ready I will let you know okay,â She said reaching back to rub his curls.
âOkay, but until then, I wonât stop asking,â He said kissing her good night and turning off the lights with his Kimoyo beads. Alix smiled knowing that in her heart she didnât want him to stop asking. It reminded her where she wanted her home to lie.
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The West Coast Trail; A Vancouver Island Adventure Of A Lifetime
Packing: Food/Clothes/Essentials | Booking: Reservations/Transport | Research | Facts | My Story | Start | Days 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 | Chez Moniques | Nitinaht Crab Shack
The West Coast Trail is one of the most, if not the most, iconic Canadian west coast adventure a hiker could ask for. It is a 75km test of both physical and mental endurance in one of the most stunning environmental settings you have ever seen. Not everyone that sets out for this great journey completes it, but those that do have a tale to tell for a lifetime and a forever bond with those they meet along the way.
Having completed this epic trail twice now, my approach is to blend a little bit of old and new into a (hopefully) wondrous tail that offers context, wisdom and insight to the journey, while describing the magical things you will experience and the challenges you will face. Iâve also prepared additional posts for your reading pleasure on Packing: Food/Clothes/Essentials and Booking: Reservations/Transport. So please, grab a hot cup of tea, throw on those comfy pjs and sit back and enjoy the read.Â
Handy References and Information Material
Every great hike starts with research, especially this one! If you haven't heard of it yet, look up the famed book Blisters and Bliss: A Trekker's Guide to the West Coast Trail by David Foster and Wayne Aitken. This awesomely 80âČs comic styled guide adds a little light-hearted humour to a highly detailed account of the WCT which is revised roughly every couple years. It offers both trekking options (north to south AND south to north!) and gives you all the step by step nitty gritty deets in between including history, objects of interest, geological features and safety tips! I suggest taking it with you and read about the section ahead each night. Also, opt to keep it in a safe pack pocket, donât put it in a plastic bag (I did this my first time and sadly lost my copy to the inescapable moisture and mold).
Check out the West Coast Trail Facebook Page! This page is not manned by Parks Canada. However, it is a great place to meet other hikers, find someone looking to ride share, ask questions and for advice, learn about recent developments and important information (washed out bridges, danger sections, wildlife sightings or concerns... even hear about annoyed hikers picking up others garbage...not kidding lol).
Oh! And there is also a Womenâs West Coast Trail Page!
Parks Canada Website. Duh, right?! But you may not realize that Parks Canada has some handy info regarding what to pack (and what not to!), emergency items, wildlife warnings, necessary fees, maps, tide tables, tips and more to make your hike a happy one. Check out the Planning For WCT page here.
You'll also find online a plethora of websites, blogs and articles dedicated to WCT info, tips, advice, and more. I encourage you to read a few personal accounts to get a real life feel of what others experience. Here are some of my favourites (donât let the names scare you!), plus a very cool and scholarly article from UofBC on the effects of colonial-style tourism in the area and on the local indigenous tribes written in 2020. Fascinating read.
Hike The WCT (website)
Walking the wild coast : territory, belonging, and tourism on the West Coast Trail (UofBC Open Collection)
Lost On The West Coast Trail
How Not To Die On The West Coast Trail
The Facts
The West Coast Trail is 75 km long. That's on the map and, best as I can figure, relatively "as the crow flies". It does not account for the extra steps, the ladders, the climbing, the crawling, the descending, etc, you get the picture. Both times I've gone my fitbit has read almost double or more the distance in 'real ground covered'. For example, when they say its 5km from the Gordon River Trail Head to Thrasher Cove, my fitbit in both cases recorded over 12 km when all was said and done. When they tell you it takes on average 5-6 hours to do that stretch, and you're only covering 1km or less an hour, this is why. You will chuckle in the orientation, as many have, and think, "ya, if you're a SNAIL!", but you will soon realize itâs about the terrain and that you're essentially doing double or more the physical effort to cross it. The same is true for nearly all the trail, even the "easy parts".
Safety First - the majority of accidents and injuries occur in the first 13 kms on the south side of the trail, from Gordon River at km 75, to Camper Bay at km 62. The trail accommodates just over 7500 people a year. Of that, Parks Canada evacuates roughly 80-100 injured persons annually and Nitinaht villagers have claimed to ferry out 100-200 additional hikers off the trail as well, due to injury, misery, etc. It wonât be a bear or cougar that takes you out, itâll be the wilderness itself. A fall from a wet log or slimy stone is the most common culprit, and it may not even be the fall itself, but what you land on. Sharp rocks, jabbing sticks, etc all cause serious injury. And it always happens when you're TIRED. Don't push yourself. Take a break, have a snack, don't go farther in a day than your body can handle. Better to be a day late than waiting 24 hrs in the bush with no morphine and a broken leg for a boat ride that surely will be agonizing. Just sayin' here...
The WCT historically was maintained for shipwrecked mariners. Many have lost their lives along this trail. I donât understand how it doesnât have its own ghost story yet! It has an amazing history with lots of ship wreckage to see along the way if you time the tides right.
Lastly, the temperate rainforest that engulfs the WCT is not only stunning but globally very rare, encompassing less than 1% of ecosystems across the earth. Here you will see plants, trees and animals that may not exist anywhere else on our planet. The Sitka Spruce for example is among not only the tallest trees in the world, but also the oldest, some 700-1000 years old. This means they have seen North America as it was before European Settlers touched it. They are revered by many and highly sought after by loggers, which often leads to conflicts. Many extremely unique animals also reside in the WCT, like the islands' black bears which are actually larger than mainland black bears with massive skulls and only one unique colour phase. The island is also home to cougars, Victoria's famous mini-deer and sea-wolves, the only wolves in the world that have adapted to life on a coastline, they call the Pacific Coast home. With a completely unique diet of seafood they are genetically different from mainland wolves and have also been known to swim in the ocean for many kilometers.
My West Coast Trail Story
Now, before we begin, I'll preface this by saying, don't mistake me for a pro; I am simply someone who has made it off the WCT twice [relatively] safely and lived to share my tale. If you are looking for expert advice I'd say check out the Parks Canada website or the Blisters and Bliss book. But if you are looking for a heartwarming and informative, real life account of the experience, you've come to a great place.
I am now amongst a lucky few that have had the enormous privilege to have hiked the West Coast Trail not only once, but twice in my lifetime thus far. I say thus far because this trail has such a special place in my heart I expect at some point I will likely attempt it again. It changed my life and has had an everlasting impact on the lives of those around me. I learned a lot about myself and even more about those closest to me. What I am capable of, the importance of preparation and planning, the bonds you create with people you meet along the way and the love of those that support you going and take care of things while you're gone. I simply couldnât have done this without the support of my amazing husband, friends, parents and sister and my wonderful sister in law whom we stayed with this time. But most importantly I missed the encouragement and support of my mother-in-law who lived on the island and sadly has passed since my first trip. She and her friends played such an instrumental role in my first journey with my sister, buying us foods, housing us, driving us, and just overall being so excited to see us off, I truly missed her this time but I know she was there with me in spirit.
In this way the West Coast Trail is a life-shaping experience like no other. You will learn much about yourself, be in awe and hopefully inspired by the incredible natural world around you and you will meet fellow Canadians and global trotters and, in turn, become a part of their WCT story. Let me be amongst the first to congratulate you on this epic endeavor and wish you the happiest, and safest, of journeys and hopefully I can send you off a bit more well prepared for the adventure.
First Timers VS Second Timers
My experience as a first time WCT hiker was extremely different from my second expedition in every way possible.
The first time I hiked the WCT I went with my youngest sister Jenna. We had both hiked and camped before but this was a new experience and everything was raw, a bit scary, amazing and beautiful all at once. I think it just hit us both like a ton of bricks when we landed at the base of that first ladder across the Gordon River. Although Sharon had talked to me for months, mentally preparing me for the hike, when Jenna and I both looked up at the rest of our start group scaling that first beast, looming up from the small beach landing, I know we both had the exact same thought, like, "oh shit, this is for real...".
Why the WCT? Sharon, my good friend and co-worker, had previously attempted it before turning me onto it. Due to an unfortunate incident with her hiking companion, they had to turn in the towel. She has since rocked it twice more and was an absolute wealth of information, support and the wisdom that only an experienced female hiker, mom and athlete can be. Much of what I am sharing with you today began with her. She continues to inspire me every day with her ferocity and determination and boundless want for adventure.
At the time of my first hike in 2016, my mother-in-law lived on Vancouver Island and she and her best friend Jill had kindly arranged for us to stay at another friend's cottage just outside Port Alberni. The friend and her husband fed us well and the beauty of the setting was unimaginable. But the anticipation of what lay ahead weighed heavily on both Jenna and I and neither of us barely slept a wink. The next morning we had our last hot shower and flush toilet experience for the next 7 days and the 4 of us set out for the Gordon River Trail Head.
We piled into Jillâs car the following morning. The ride was long, on gravel switch back logging roads, but the supportive company made the nervous anticipation bearable. I feel like I did not appreciate the ride as much as I should have at the time, but a few 5 am bus rides (and much experience) later, I certainly cherish the thought my mother-in-law and Jill had put into making the beginning special for us both.
Since then, I've booked my island hike transports with the West Coast Trail Express bus. The folks there are super helpful and the experience has always been a good one. In 2018, a WCT facebook group was created which has made connecting with others looking for ride shares and doing the trail much easier AND more informative! You can read about this page and other research options at the top of this post if you missed them ;)
When 2016 saw Jenna and I land at Gordon River's Information Station, I was greeted with an amazing surprise... Sharon and Jackie (another friend) had pre-purchased for me a WCT t-shirt. I cried, there were no words. When 2021 saw Krista and I land at Gordon River's Information Station, I was greeted with a sense of the familiarity of the adventure and vicariously enjoyed the wonder of someone else now experiencing the trail for the first time... READY?!.. and INHALE... can you smell it..? the Adventure?! It's like greeting an old friend again, for the first time.
It's Like Those Choose Your Own Adventure Books, Where You Pick Your Ending...
Remember those..? Maybe..? When Starting the WCT, you can plan to start at either entry point, Gordon River to the south or Pacheena Bay to the north, or now even halfway at Nitinaht. There are advantages to all, so it just depends what is most appealing to you. Most people do the trail within a 6-8 day time frame. This gives a good balance of time vs pack weight. I always try to plan for an extra emergency day, just in case. Things happen here... Long stays requires more provisions and a heavier pack. Shorter stays (in my personal opinion) are extremely challenging, unless you have done the trail before, are very skilled in lightweight packing and are an expert hiker. I still wouldn't recommend it. Plus, if you're going that fast, you're rushing by so much, what's the point? If you've paid and taken the time to be here, enjoy it! That being said, when Jenna and I did the trail we were treated to watching marathoner and athlete Jen Segger run it in one day. ONE DAY. She currently holds the women's record for WCT completion at 13 hrs 44mins (as posted here on her page under 2016). Of course she had no pack and support runners with her and a camera crew. But as she ran by us I think both our jaws dropped. It was like watching Super Woman run by you and you were just lucky if her sweat spayed you as she passed by.Â
When you start out, keep in mind your pack is at it's heaviest. Starting at Pacheena Bay entry point means you'll be hiking the easiest parts of the trail first. You'll make excellent time here and cover the most distance over the shortest number of days. Although all areas of the trail offer exquisite and unique beauty, in my opinion the north end is the most magical. Maybe because by the time I reach it Im half delirious and most certainly exhausted so the easier hike is a much welcome break. Both times I've hiked the WCT I have opted to start at the southern trail head point known as Gordon River.
Starting at Gordon River means that you get through the most difficult terrain right at the beginning, when you're freshest, well rested and eager to set out. You also have the added benefit of anticipating the terrain getting easier (rather than harder). To me, this is the most logical approach and why I prefer this route and honestly, there is just something that seems slightly disillusioning about expecting something to get harder along the way. When Jenna and I first made it up that initial ladder we came across several groups finishing their hike. One in particular stuck out, a group of three female friends. We passed the first two who were happy and chatting and weirdly gave us a (mild) warning to disregard their companion, who was somewhere behind them. Ok... sure, we thought. Then along came the third girl... muttering, swearing under her breath, we contemplated what she might do to her companions if she caught up to them and we joked about how that likely was the end of that friendship. 2016 was a much busier year, pre-covid and all, and we met so many more people, Canadians, Germans, Chinese and Auzzies!Â
2021 though is the year of the Canadians! If you happen to head out on the WCT this year, although you will still experience a wide range of people (Canada is an extraordinarily diverse nation!), rest assured most currently reside within Canada. Hello Homies! It was, however, a much more muted WCT experience than my past one. Although the Parks staff assured me they have had lots of people come through (I asked!), and the online bookings are sold out, it seemed so much quieter day to day. At the time Krista and I arrived, Parks staff were still only doing outdoor basic debriefing, prior to which we were expected to watch an online information video covering the basics. This was in stark contrast to the very in depth orientation Jenna and I had to attend back in 2016.Â
Fellow Canadians, Tsk Tsk...
The biggest difference I noticed that could be as a result of the minimized debrief is the amount of garbage. There is NO garbage removal on the trail. Parks staff DO NOT haul garbage out (its a remote wilderness, do you really expect garbage men??). The WCT is accessible by foot (as in, you hike in... for 75 km) OR by boat, the latter being weather and safety dependant in extreme occasions (ie emergency evacuation). At each campsite we stayed, hikers THIS year (the trail was closed 2020) have left copious amounts of garbage. Itâs in the bear bins, on the trail, the beach, in the outhouses... itâs EVERYWHERE. The worst by far was Camper Bay with stinking tuna cans and bags in every bear bin and Cribbs Creek, where the garbage pile extended to a massive bottle collection BEHIND the bear bin.
Why do sites have bear bins in the first place? Because human food and waste smells amazing to BEARS! So we lock it away to keep it, and us, safe. This does not mean a bear canât smell it, it just means they canât access it. Now, what happens when food rots and gets stinkier...? Of course it's more enticing. This draws bears, and other animals, to the campsite, which puts your safety, and the safety of each camper, at risk. I have to give Krista major kuudos here because that girl dug in deep, cleaned someone else's mess at each site we stopped at and even hauled out other people's stinky gross trash. Please give her a round of applause for thinking about you because she deserves it. And as Canadians, seriously, we can do better right??
Da' Debrief
Apologies, now thatâs out, let's get on. During our debrief we learned some important key points.
2021 has seen unprecedented amounts of animal sightings and encounters. Primarily bear and cougar. There has also been more daytime sightings of wolves, which is considered extremely rare. With the trail closed in 2020, lack of human presence has caused a larger wildlife presence. Be aware, practice safety, travel in groups. Groups are also being asked to accommodate single hikers to reduce risk.
There is a lot of maintenance to be done that wasn't able to be accomplished in 2020 due to the pandemic. Be prepared for washed out boardwalks, bridges and rotten boards. There is also fewer Parks staff to help with this upkeep. Luckily, local members of indigenous tribes, called the Trail Guardians, historically help in a huge way with this and you may even run into them on the trail! We saw their team arrive in their new boat leaving Walbran and at Pacheena we spoke to a Parks staff who's uncle is on the team. It's a small world here.
Following the debrief, the Parks staff escort you to the Gordon River ferry. The fellow here takes you across and plops you down on the small sandy beach, gathers up any hikers waiting for a ride back and heads off on his way. And there you are, left to stare at a huge ladder, really, the first of many.
up, Up, UP You Go!
In 2016 Jenna and I patiently waited at the end of the line to be the last two up the ladder and I tackled the climb with my 50lb pack in tow (phew!). In 2021 Krista and I were the only two standing on the beach, me revelling in my 'barely there' 38lb pack. The trail was our oyster!
The trek from Gordon River to Thrasher Cove is the most challenging and physically demanding on the trail. We left on the 11:30 ferry and finally walked into Thrashers Cove at 5pm - Yes, it DOES take that long. You actually don't see many ladders, a few here and there, but best believe you are still climbing! You scramble up rock faces, you squeeze past trees, you choose your footing extremely carefully and all the while up, up, UP you GO! Even over rocks and hard ground the trail is fairly well worn and easy to follow... most of the time. A short while in you come to the first bridge over the first creek. I have stopped here both times to fill up water bottles, but beware, the scramble back up is more difficult than it looks this year due to the fallen trees. Mountain Goat level scuttling expertise is advised! Much further along, not far from Thrashers, you'll eventually comes across the famed Donkey Engine! This year you will find it to be directly in your path, where as in 2016 Iâm quite sure we looked down on it somehow from a higher elevation. Either way, itâs epic and makes for an amazing photo op! To think that thing was hauled by beast and hand up that hill still blows my mind.
Along the way we met a very nice gentleman named Wilson who had intended to hike the WCT with his son. Unfortunately, due to a graduation re-scheduling mishap his son was unable to come, but Wilson decided to soldier on. He was incredibly happy, thoughtful and polite and asked if we minded if he tagged along as we hiked. He regaled us with tails of his trails, immigration to Canada, his wife and family and much more; he was a fascinating fellow! With the wildlife warnings this year, Parks staff request that no one hike alone, if you can, allow a solo hiker to tag along so everyone can stay safe. We graciously obliged and enjoyed his company and great conversation for a couple more days until we parted ways at Nitinaht comfort camping.
Thrasher's Cove is an amazing, but small, campsite. I recall vividly in 2016 the trail down to the beach being extremely treacherous, with steep and slippery embankments and so many ladders! By comparison our 2021 descent seemed like a cake-walk. Here I was, boasting to Krista the challenge that lay before her, but when we got there it was literally a quick hop and skip down. She found anything I said after that to be hard to believe and was convinced I was totally embellishing. It really made me realize how MUCH the trail changes and what dynamic metamorphosis must have occurred in 6 years! I also realized how hard Trail Guardians and Parks staff must work to maintain all this constantly worn out infrastructure. It must a BEAST. Be warned, if you arrive to Thrashers too late in the day it will be tough finding a spot. If this happens to you, check out the south side of the beach, sometimes there's a bit more space there. Ironically, I have set up my tent in the exact same spot both times, right in front of the tiny triangle cave around the rock wall on the south side of the beach. I have claimed this spot now.
Knock, Knock, It's The Ocean!
This is also where knowing how to read your tide tables is extremely important. While camping on the beach you must pitch your tent above the high tide line. The high tide line is where you can see the sand was last wet on the beach. It's not where the water is when you arrive. Look for the wet point on the sand and keep your tent a few good feet above that. When Jenna and I first arrived at Thrashers, I was confident in my tide table reading skills; being from Alberta, I took the time to learn how to read them in advance. But, during the orientation the Park staff had warned our group that our first night was due to be the highest high tide of the year - intimidating to a couple prairie girls! And, which is also a thing if you read up on the moon cycle! (Actually there is a lot of news this year on the effects of the moon's impending orbital wobble on tides, its a fascinating read if you're interested!). So, naturally a bit cautious and overly leery of the horror stories of campers waking up to soaked tents in the middle of the night, my poor sister was worried sick. Exhausted but too afraid to sleep, I promised her I'd stay up till high tide to make sure we were safe. She soon passed out and I settled in reading my book. But the surf was loud and near, a thundering, crashing rukus with each wave and about 2 hours in my sister jolted straight up in her sleeping bag, scaring the ba-geezus outta me crying out 'IS IT HERE?! IS THE OCEAN HERE YET?! ", big-eyed I just stared, then broke out laughing; I settled her back down, reassured her we were safe, now passed the time of concern, and wiggled down into my own sack to drift off. It's still an inside joke to this day and once in a while we chuckle to each other about the time the ocean came knocking.
2021 brought me its own surprise when at 4am I awoke to an unusual scratching noise against our tent next to my head. We had wrapped our rain covers around our [empty] backpacks and snugged them up against the tent to stay dry and save space. Apparently the local otter family found them fascinating and decided to check them out on their morning stroll. An alarm clock certainly fit for the WCT.Â
It's A Beach Walk, Not A Cake Walk
Leaving Thrasher's Cove you have two options! You can take the beach route if you time the tides carefully OR you can take the inland route. In 2016 Jenna and I sojourned the inland route. Although the inland hike was pretty, if I'd found the trek down to Thrashers tough, the trek back up would've been classed insane. Sharonâs favourite saying is, what goes down must go up. In 2021 Krista and I timed the tide, leaving at 7:30am, to take the beach route. Although we'd planned to avoid what turned out to not be a bad climb, I'd really wanted to see the famous sea caves! The sea caves themselves were nothing short of AMAZING. There is just no other word. I was so in awe that in my mind they seem to take up almost 3 days of our trip, not just half an hour on the second day.
Although we'd planned to aim for Cullite Creek Campground day 2, we hit a major snag. As we traipsed along, well after the sea caves, we came to a rocky sea shelf that rose high out of the water. As you look up, you might catch a glimpse of some buoys, which commonly mark the beach access to the trail and campgrounds. Thinking this was our access back onto the trail, as you must go inland from here to Campers, we headed up along the higher shelf. We passed an unusual 'Danger' sign. We looked around, but could not identify anything that seemed out of the ordinary for where we were. We kept on. We came to a similar sign on the rock, but again, failed to see what was obviously dangerous. Wasps? Bear den? Surge Channel? There was no fallen bridge, no down ladder. Everything seemed ok. We reached the buoys, and Krista lifted her leg to step over a small trickle of a water... That's when it happened.
Danger on the Trail...
Before she could even complete her step, both feet flew out from beneath her and her whole body, pack and all, smashed onto the rock shelf. She began rocketing like a she was on a pro waterslide down the embankment towards a 9 foot drop into the water pool below. I had the wherewithal to shout out 'grab a rock!', and in the 3 seconds that seemed like 3 hours, I had the presence of mind to ponder how I might explain this to her mother back at home and 4 year old son if things went sideways... but with a 38lb pack on myself and being a few feet behind, there was no way I could move fast enough to do anything but yell.
Luckily, mid-slide, she managed to grab a handhold just long enough to stop and get some footing. Crisis averted, but the damage was done. Wearing shorts, she was sporting some nasty road rash on her cheek and arm, but most of the damage was buffered by the hoodie she'd had tied around her waist. She was bruised, but she was lucky.
Feeling pretty roughed up, we opted to stay at Camper Bay instead and rolled in about 1pm where we washed and treated her ailing buttocks and gave her some much needed pain meds. Along came a few more groups and we felt a bit less sheepish learning 2 of them had also had the exact same experience. Pride slightly less wounded, we made some new friends for the chatter and laid back and chilled for the afternoon. On your parks provided trail map, you will see a small note in red pointing to BA 'B' (beach access B) that warns about a dangerous slope just past the surge channels after Owen Point. It's not kidding.
If you stay at Camper Bay, it's a lovely and large campsite with lots of room for everyone. However, it has a habit of getting very windy, like all the time, and the only time it's not is when the sun goes down. If you're early enough, grab one of the sheltered tent spots in the woods/taller grass along the creek side. It also has a rep for early morning rain and fog. Something about the geography here seems to create its own micro-environment. If you walk out along the beach at low tide and cross the creek to the north, you'll see some neat tidal pools and caves in the rock wall. In the one with the small pool of water you might see a single lonely fish with the pool all to himself. I hope one day the tide washes him in friend.
Reminiscing...
Ironically, day 2 in 2016 was also the day I had a mishap of my own. Tired and worn down, toddling after Jenna across a log bridge the width of my car, I misstepped. My feet were somehow gone and in a second I found myself sitting on my ass, straddling the log instead of walking on it. I peered down into the 6 foot drop below. Completely in disbelief I suddenly realized Jenna was yelling at me "Are you OK?!" ... Yes! I was! I was ok. Nothing was broken, hurt or otherwise. But it was a wake up call. If you are tired, take a break, don't push on or try to keep up with someone faster. Only hike as fast as your slowest hiker and be patient. Take a breath and remember, the goal is no one dies out here... hopefully.
Gone Are The Days Of Legendary Mud And Tilting Ladders That Make You Poop ... Just A Little
The few days that followed are a bit of a blur. There's so much to see and so little blog space to include it all! We left Campers Bay on a foggy, rain mist morning at about 10am. Since we had to take the inland trail there was no worry about racing the tide on this stretch. We chatted with the couple we met the night before (Mat and Lauren from Calgary!). Everyone was a bit tired that morning.
Although we saw some mud, with a historic heat wave just prior to our trip in 2021, the legendary mud pits that the WCT has typically been known for were non-existent. In 2016 Jenna and I spent most of our inland trail time figuring out how to cross mud-holes, watching where each other stepped and trying not to fall in up to our armpits (I kid you not). This time, there was no mud and if you disagree with me, go again after it rains. I dare you.
This is also the section where we saw the most ladders, most notably through Cullite Creek, which was sadly such a trickle there was no need for the cable car, we just rock hopped across (with ease). We saw some really cool art done along the trail by the Guardians in the new bridge and log cuttings, some even signed their names! Have you tried making a curve with a chainsaw? I was impressed.
This section also has a neat and unique stretch of boardwalk that goes through a fragile wetland. Sections of the boardwalk were out, it looks easy, don't let it fool you!
A brand-spank'in new suspension bridge calls Logan Creek home! In 2016 Jenna and I had to climb a harrowing series of crazy, half-tilted ladders to get to the bridge. I recall my favourite as being the third ladder in a tower, that was so amazingly on a 10 degree angle sideways, and scaling it with my 50lb backpack. It was all I could do not to roll off and meet a perilous end at the bottom of the gully. Today the beautiful new bridge almost disappointed with the ease it took to cross it. NO more ladder climbing, you just walk up the stairs and off you go!
We arrived in Walbran Campsite at 5:30, the creek is perfect for swimming if itâs warm enough. Several groups had a run-in here with a couple breaking the fire ban policy. People on the WCT take this seriously, keep in mind if you start a forest fire here, thereâs no where to go and it puts the homes of indigenous peoples at severe risk too. We all simmered, had a tasty meal, chatted with our travel companions, explored the beach a bit and turned in for the night, thoroughly exhausted.
We spent the next two days going from Walbran Campsite to Cribbs and then to Tsuisiat Falls. Due to a problematic and confrontational cougar in 2021 there is no camping permitted along the trail between kilometer 34 to 38. So, naturally, your last stop prior to Nitinaht Narrows is Cribbs Creek.
The Stretch from Walbran to Cribbs is basically all beach walk. The beach is lovely, but donât let 'beach walk' fool you. Itâs just as challenging to walk in sand as it is through forest... and you thought it was going to be easier, didnât you?! It's like walking through snow without snowshoes and being 30lbs heavier...what a Canadian thought. But! Fear Not! along this stretch is also the famed Chez Moniques burger stop and the Carmanah Lighthouse! The lighthouses are closed to the public this year due to covid, but itâs still a sight to behold as it beams brightly through the fog.
The Legend That Is Chez Moniques
In 2016 Jenna and I made a critical, but common, food planning error. We packed meals based on what we felt was healthy and would give us energy, without accounting for taste. In other words, we packed a lot of dry lentil-based meals that tasted awful and took forever to cook and I couldn't have forced down my throat if you had paid me. I love beans, but dried lentils on the trail... yech! You can read more about our cautionary tale in my food section, and if you're uncertain about foods to pack, itâs worth the read!
So, sufficed to say, that year we had the absolute pleasure of experiencing Chez Moniques in it's prime. It was incredible. Here we were, in the middle of nowhere, exhausted, starving (I was anyway lol), and run off our feet. And out of nowhere arose this mirage of a tent with burgers, fancy meals, peach ciders and more! My god it was intense. We kicked off our boots, stuffed our faces, chatted with Monique, the legend herself, and I protectively cradled the best Okanagan Cider that had ever touched my lips while we waited for the tide to recede. It was magical.
Sadly, between 2017-2018 both Monique and her husband tragically passed away. It was a blow felt around the world by all those who had passed through their doors and experienced their generosity. There is a lovely documentary attributed to their memory here. Today, in 2021, following a devastating 2020 with no business, Monique & Peter's grand-daughter, Katrina Knighton is trying to carry on the dream though the restaurant will be renamed as Nytom. We heard lots of chatter and some hikers did actually see her in person, but unfortunately there are some struggles, including keeping up supply levels, which they are walking in for 1.5 hours (!). We missed them this year, as did many hikers, and I was so sad Krista would not experience it. But! They are rumoured to have services most often morning and around 5pm. Katrina is also very active on the WCT Facebook page, so feel free to drop her a line there for more info!
We arrived in Cribbs Creek at about 2:30pm. It was the end of our Day 4 and what a campsite it was. Lovely soft sand under your toes and beautiful beach. There is nothing here for swimming but we had the most amazing sunset view on the rock shelf that night. Although it didn't rain while we were on the trail, this was the first time we'd seen the sun since we left Victoria.
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The Magical Beauty Of Nitinaht And The Crab Shack Of Your Dreams
We left Cribbs Creek about 9am and stuck to mostly inland trail. Other hikers going the opposite way had warned it was very overgrown but we honestly had no problems with it; it was a little underused, but keep in mind they hadn't seen the south side yet. We made excellent time and arrived in Nitinaht Narrows at 1:09pm. The journey is absolutely stunning. There is a new bridge over the creek at Dare Beach and the forest walk is lovely. The bridge over the Cheewhat River offers great views also. You cannot take water from the river itself but after the bridge there is a freshwater stream marked by a wooden sign if you need it and soon you will come across an old Cabin. When you arrive here, turn around and see the new and amazing Ditidaht home across the river. It has changed a bit, likely with the drought, but in 2016 Jenna and I referred to this stretch as "the place that Disney films are based on". Ivy clung all the way up the trees and just as you wrapped your head around that, the trail winds it's way through a silent coniferous forest where you could almost hear a pin drop, followed by a magical wetland lake with flowering lilly pads the size of your head. But none of this compares to Nitinaht Narrows.
As you walk along the trail, just a few short minutes past the lake, the path will turn from boardwalk to dirt and as you round the bend you will suddenly walk, with no warning, right into Nitinaht! It has caught me by surprise each time. We strolled down the walkways to the dock, left our packs safely on the bench and made our way to the Crab Shack. The blue-green waters of Nitinaht Narrows is something to behold. When you peer over the side of the wharf you see schools of small fish so thick you could almost surely touch them. When I dream of paradise, I dream of here.
Nitinaht Narrows was only recently made an 'official' entry and exit point by Parks Canada in 2014, you can read more about it here. But prior to this, older community members witnessed the inception and rise of the WCT as we know it today and watched it grow. Ferrying hikers across the narrows has become a task handed down from generation to generation. Connected to the ocean, it has tides about 10 minutes apart and historically, many years ago, hikers did drown trying to swim across before getting swept out to sea, naively misjudging the calm-looking waters. About 3 kms past the narrows, the Ditidaht band offers comfort camping options to those looking to settle and day hike the trail or in need of a break from the grind. This is marked with a sign and you will see it on the trail. The crab shack itself has also recently built new cabins as well which start from roughly $100/night (houses 4 bodies and you use your own sleeping bag) and goes up to ($200 and $300) where bedding is provided. They also offer tent platforms for a modest $30/night fee.
The Nitinaht Crab Shack is owned and operated by the Edgar family. They are kind, light-hearted, hospitable and will make you the best meal you have ever had. They work extremely hard and have a great sense of humour. A family member told me the previous day they had served a group of 20 lunch all at the same time! Hippie-Doug was their ring leader that day and he manned the ferry, that took us across the narrows to complete our journey, along with a sweet old chocolate lab you will see in many a hikers' photos. If you catch him at a slow moment he might share a joke and and story with you. But don't leave until you have warmed yourself thoroughly by the wood stove, had the best meal this side of Canada and picked up some treats for the road. The ferry finishes for the day at 4:30pm and then Hippie-Doug settles in for a much deserved break, a meal, and maybe a drink, so don't be late!
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Tsu-Tsu-Tsusiat!
We left the warming comfort of the Nitinaht stove at about 3pm and headed on our way. We saw our new friend and traveling tag-along Wilson off at the Ditidaht Comfort Camping site and continued on, arriving at Tsusiat Falls by 6:30pm. You can't see the falls from the beach, but if you reach the hole in the wall at Tsusiat Point, you're just minutes away.
In 2016, the first 5 days of our hike Jenna and I had the most amazing weather. On our 5th day, after the crab shack, while the sun beamed a balmy 25+ C, we ditched our packs on a slope of sand with gentler waters between Nitinaht and Tsusiat Point and ran into the ocean up to our knees, jumping the waves and being astonished at their strength. We laid on the beach afterwards and soaked in the sun. When I think of my little sister, I often think of this carefree day and smile. Enjoy the journey as you go, or youâll miss the best parts.
Tsusiat Falls is a popular campground. When we arrived the beach was packed. According to 2021 Parks regs, you can only stay one night here to minimize environmental impact. The beach was very different from what I remembered, but the falls were ever glorious. We threw on bathing suites and while Krista enjoyed the brief sun, I took a dip in the beckoning water.
The next morning, with Krista not feeling hot, I'd aimed to get up early and walk back to the Hole In The Wall with my Nikon DSLR camera. When we passed by the day before it was high tide and the Hole was under sea water. However, after a delay, Krista decided to come with me. We packed up, left our bags at Tsusiat and strolled back to the hole together, and a better decision it was. Iâd watched a group ahead of us pass through an hour ago, but beneath their tracks you could make out a fresh set of cougar prints. Since low tide was at 10am that morning, that means the tracks were very recent and could only have been made since the water receded. Food for thought.
Darling Bears You Might Be Cute, But I Don't Want To Snuggle
The last 2 days on the WCT (or your first two, depending where you start) are the easiest to hike and where you make up the most ground. We'd intended to land at Darling River Campsite (approx km 14), which from Tsusiat (approx km 25) would make it about an 11 km day. Most of our fellow travellers whom we had become familiar with were aiming for Michigan Creek though, which would add 2 km to our 6th day, but save us that on our 7th and final day out. We decided to see what the day held and if we arrived at Darling early we might continue on. WELL.... what the day held was not entirely what we expected.
In 2016 Jenna and I walked the beach hike between Tsocowis Creek and Michigan Creek. It had started to rain the night before and by morning was a light, but steady, downpour. We donned our rain gear but by noon, and halfway through our distance, it was clear that Jenna's rain jacket was not waterproof. Though she had tested it prior to leaving, it turned out not to be up to WCT-level rain. As we continued on poor Jenna got wetter and wetter and by the time we reached Michigan, she was soaked through to the bone. Water pooled in her boots, and she shivered so hard she couldn't help me with the tent. Realizing this could get worse quickly, I popped the tent, got her changed and snugged into her sleeping bag ASAP. Then I worked on adding a tarp. When the shivering stopped we got a warm meal into her and passed our time taking turns winding up our emergency radio and trying to maintain the faint signal from a long forgotten US talk station till darkness fell. It poured the entire next day as well for a total of over 24 hours straight and our photos at the Pacheena lighthouse are in plastic emergency ponchos.
In 2021 Krista and I opted for the inland trail as we'd previously made better time this way. There is lots to see here, another Donkey Engine and a rusty old grader, and I absolutely love the Billy Goat Bridge. The trail threw us for a bit at Tsocowis Creek, there, phantom branch-offs seemed to lead off and abruptly stop. You have to go down the ladders to continue the inland trail portion (OR access the beach). However, just passed Orange Juice Creek, it was quite clear this section of trail was not well used recently... by people anyway. It was eerily dark, overgrown and passed by what looked like long lost abandoned campsites in caves along the rock wall. As we passed by we heard something stir in the dim light, knocking over an old cup, and we nervously quickened our pace. We began to see pile after pile of fresh bear scat, some so fresh that by the time we reached Darling we figured we must be just behind it. Making a lot of noise we made our way to the beach and relief washed over us as we recognized people half a km ahead... our fellow Albertans, Mat and Lauren! But when they stopped suddenly and started to back up we knew something wasn't right.
Just ahead of them on the beach was our bear. And big guy he was! They figured a lone male. They managed to scare him off and once we caught up the 4 of us made our way as a group to Michigan Creek just down the beach where we figured there was relative safety in numbers.
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Bitter Sweet Goodbyes
Our last day from Michigan to the Information Station at Pacheena was a super short one. We were the last hikers to leave Michigan at 8am and among the first ones (ironically) to reach the Parks office at 11:01am. The path is very well maintained and an easy hike. You'll also see a lot of day hikers here, many with dogs. Along the way are some cool sights you won't want to miss, so don't be too quick to rush out. The abandoned dirt bike isn't going anywhere fast anymore, but be sure to check out the sea lion rock just passed km 10. You may even hear them from the trail! Just before the sea lions you'll also pass by the Pacheena Lighthouse. Again, due to covid, you cant access the grounds but you can totally snap a quick pic! The area has so much bear activity Parks Staff joke about running 'bear daycare' here so be vigilant. Two wonderfully enthusiastic young ladies we met along the way carried an amazing tune; Im sure they must've charmed away any "would be" encounters.
In 2016 there was no km 1 sign on the trail and in 2021 there was still no km 1 sign lol. Both times I raced past km 2 and then later wished I'd taken a pic with it. You'll want it as proof! We walked the very last km along the beach, where firm sand makes for easy going. There were bear sightings of a mother and cubs here just before we arrived. We missed them, but were lucky enough to get some great foot-print photos. The very last bench you'll see on the trail is emblazoned with the word 'PARKS'. We sat here for an eternal minute and took some photos. As we strolled towards the Information station I couldn't believe it was over again so quickly.
Looking back, even after time number two, it feels more like a dream. The first time I walked off the trail in 2016 I eagerly anticipated a hot shower, was thoroughly disappointed at finding I had no quarters for to pay for one and I spent the 5 hour bus ride home starving and trying to sleep on a roller coaster. Perhaps not such a glorious end, but I realized I had achieved something few people would in their life time and of that I was SO proud of Jenna and myself. We did it.
When I arrived back at work Sharon had the most glorious little bouquet of flowers for me and she glued tiny cut out flags of all the major trail milestones to skewer sticks throughout. It brought tears to my eyes.... she told me this, "for a while, you will think to yourself, I am NEVER going back to that EVER again. And then, slowly, you will forget all the bad parts and the thought will creep in... maybe, perhaps, I might try it again... and you will find yourself looking it up once more". And she was right, I did. And I am so glad I did... I might even do it again.
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