#i didnt write it out bc no but imagine lol
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The books and the shows aren't the same thing and?? That's okay?? It doesn't have to be??
Some of the artists haven't even seen the show yet, and maybe won't 🤷♀️ I know I've seen like. The 1st episode and that's it lol. And I really enjoyed it and I think it's really fun
But people tend to separate book fandoms from in screen fandoms, to an extent, at least, bc there ARE differences, and THATS OKAY
They are very connected but they are not the same and I don't understand why people find that so hard to accept?? Like. Genuinely I'm so confused lol
Like if someone was being disrespectful, or trying to whitewash Leah or something horrid then like. Defend her!!! (Do try to be polite tho bc people can and often do change, and they know what they have been taught until they learn more- like for example, a few years ago I had no idea ab anything lgtbq and I peob would have gotten myself canceled bc I had. No idea. Ab any of it. And despite having best intentions in heart i totally would have offended someone, and that would have crushed me, because *i didnt know*. I never would have hurt anyone on purpose, i just didnt realize what COULD hurt others on that specific topic, much less why. But now I identify with it and am learning new things ab jt every day and etc. And that's a super touchy topic for a lot of people and for good reason too! Just try to be kind first, then if they are jerks u can be a jerk back lol. Just give peopke a chnace to get better- and then PLEASE dont hold the past against them ubless they very clearly havent changed mk please please please let people grow and change and get better dont crush them before they can) anti Leah trash is. That. Trash
But why would you attack book Annabeth, just for existing? She was my childhood, and I identified a lot with her as I grew up. And guess what! I also identified with Hazel, and I do so even more now! No matter what race she will be casted as, I'm still going to imagine BOOK Hazel the way I always did. Doesn't mean I won't adore her actress, or appreciate art of the girl playing her role! But would you call me racist for drawing her as African American if her actress, was, say, Asian American? Or drawing Leo as Latino instead of Somoan? Because to me, u less I am being a jerk about it, all I'm doing is drawing the book instead of the show. Idk I'm too sleep deprived to put my thoughts into coherent words lol
I love the posts, where it's like, book Annabeth and show Annabeth holding hands. Those posts are my favorite, both because they are freaking adorable, but also. Because it's equal
They are different aspects of the same person
And
Thats
Okay
You know???
I quite literally grew up reading pjo. I read it at least once every year since I learned HOW to read, *partially on pjo*, until late middle school. I was raised on book Annabeth.
Show Annabeth is new and exciting and adorable and I'm so happy for it and I am very excited for all the people being introduced to it!!!!!!!! However, when I'm writing book pjo, I'm not swaping it out for show scenes, bc they are, in fact, different. Which, again, NOT A BAD THING. And you know what? When people from the show fandom write their scenes, they aren't going to be thinking ab the book scenes, and THATS OKAY TOO!!! And I could care less how my readers saw my characters when the read the story. I write them the way I imagine them, but it's their job as the reader to say 'no, actually :P' and swap out the appearance for one they liked better.
I did that plenty often as a kid, and i donf regeret it.
Which, ironically enough, was why my book Percy was blond until ab 6th grads XD I mixed up Luke and Percy's hair description ONCE and just. Never questioned it, though all the rereads, or looking at the covers of the books 💀 you can imagine my shock when I joined the fandom and found out Percy had black hair, instead of sandy hair like, you know, S A N D, like poseidon!!! And now show Percy is blond XD
That just proves people can imagine things how they want and jts okay- especially bc maybe, in an au, they're rifht!!! (Au being show Percy to me)
Anyways I lost my train of thought and it's almost 12 here lolll I hope I didn't say anything ill be embarrassed by come tomorrow~
Good night world :3
Hi guys, wanted to discuss something going on for a while now. What the hell is wrong with pjotwt? Like...whats wrong with this people? Do you see what they say? What they are even trying to do?
First of all, let me start by speaking about the cast. They are all wonderful children, Leah especially! She is doing an amazing job as Annabeth. But book Annabeth still exists yk? She is and she is literally white. It is not racist. But denying about a character being white in the books, even spreading hate like this...is racist. There are people out there related with Annabeth for years. People love her, every version, maybe book more maybe even the movie. How can you disrespect her like this? And most importantly, how can they attack an artist like this, with an art being so beautiful. What they are trying to do is not protecting Leah, it is spreading hate. It is awful. Making this fandom toxic, so so much.
Them trying to erase book Annabeth because she is white, trying to cover her by painting on her, shaming artists, calling people that loves her racist...What do we do about this in pjo fandom? This fandom used to be so beautiful, but now. This people are not part of the fandom in my eyes, because real fans, would respect every version of the characters, love them with their anything, even flaws. They would protect this characters because they love them, so much. And not to mention this characters are the ones Rick wrote 20 years ago, they were with us for so long.
What do tumblr think about this I wonder? Since pjo fandom is pretty active here :3
#is it so hard to just like love them all? i consider all versions of the pjo characters canon. who says that there only has to be one canon?#ramblings with regina#thd show and the books are dif and thags how its SUPPOSED TK BE#ITS OKAY#and so are everones interpretations :÷#let them coexhsist as they shoulddddd#im not giving up my book annie for show and- OR VICE VERSA#THEY ARE TBE WAY THEY ARE MEANT TO BE#LOVS THEM FHEG ARE AMAZING AND BEAUFIFUL#and so are everyones interperetaions :3#i enjoy seeing posts that play around with dif nationalities dor all of the characters#anyways cutting off b4 i ramble again gn~
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they tried to rebrand as The Criminals but riz is literally the city council's treasurer and also turns out people in their late 20s don't really name their friend groups. so now they're The Intrepid Heroes
#fantasy high#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#gorgug thistlespring#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#yes this is sorta from the same thing Ive been doing for future!riz lol. that riz is the same design basically#just the above board sona#u can kiiinda tell which of the bad kids I have a very clear vision for their future design and which I kinda wing it for lol#kristen's tank top is white and the coat is galaxy tie dye btw. I didnt have the energy to express that in ink but thats the ult version#adaine I truly imagine to grow up to be the perpetual t shirt and jeans person but she carries her sword everywhere#gorgugs truth is that shes just hot she can wear anything. but I do give him the skirt hike bc I love him#I really like skirt hike... such a fun thing to put in designs. if ur garment has no variance in how it falls or drapes u can do it urself#this is also a little bit of an exercise in how much of an accessory I can freehand from memory#fig's bass I straight up did not fact check for. just rawdogging it memory only. same with fandrangor and adaine's crocs#I did write in my funny little document that gorgug takes up baking and is good at it bc I think itd be good for him#to do basically chemistry and math that also feeds people#out of them... kristen and riz would be Good good at it. but riz would get way too stressed abt the recipe and kristen bakes by#eyeballing the texture. fabian likes decorating but refuses to get anywhere near the heat of an oven. adaine isnt good at it first try#and is like well my effort goes to other things actually. fig Loves baking and Nobody lets her into the kitchen#idk why this manifests so clear in my head. must be bc of recent foccacia events#living in the subtropics is hell for baking nobody try it ok? I tell u
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Heyyy🌟
Are you planning to write a new bokris story (completely unrelated to holidate)?
hiiiiii technically yes, but its probably not gonna be the next thing <3
again, i dont really have a schedule for what comes next, im kinda going with what im feeling like writing the most atm
so the next thing is either gonna be another bokris, jankris (both related to holidate) or unrelated to holidate bojance but we'll see! i dont have concrete plans right now
#lesbian bokris is also around somewhere but its definitely not gonna be the next upload idk when ill get to that#right now for the most part im spending my evenings watching football and making bracelets haha#so no real writing is getting done at the moment#inbox#anonymous#oh also im not really planning on anything multichapter btw#first of all again my summer is busy as hell so i wouldnt manage to work out a schedule around that#plus the fact that holidate happened is a miracle in itself idk how that DID happen i didnt imagine being able to write more than 5k even#and also i just. dont really have anything in mind that would be multichapter? and im not actively trying to come up with anything just for#the sake of writing anything#everything i did write and want to write is bc its just popped in my head in a daydream and then wouldnt leave again lol
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So I was chatting with my fellow very mentally ill queer coworker friend about mental illness (as we do) and I mentioned how I was realizing that my wildly manic depressive response to grief wasn't... normal...
& they were like 'oh my god Yeah I've been suspecting you're bipolar for a While now' bc apparently I get in... modes... where my pupils are Huge and I'm talking a mile a minute and doing 4 things at once and even my Posture is different
And then I'll come in the next day like all the life's been sucked out of me.
& she mentioned there's type 1 and type 2, 1 being the longterm episodes & 2 being them alternating on a day to day basis. And I'm just like... damng... I sure do seem to have that 2 thing...
Apparently it's not normal to alternate between manic and depressive states! Who knew!
#speculation nation#ive like... always had this sorta thing. fatally hyperactive is how ive thought of it#those moods where im bouncing off the wall and super cheerful but DEFINITELY in a concerning mental state#apparently it's not exactly normal to be having a breakdown but laughing as you do it#no wonder no depression meds have worked for me. bc im not Just Depressed.#ive known for a while now that i dont have normal depression. i just dont. but sometimes im depressed#and then sometimes i write 70k words in 3 weeks!!!!!!!!#it makes sense but i kinda wish it didnt lol. as if autism and adhd wasnt enough. bipolar too??? really????#im gonna do some research & see if it's smth worth looking into treatment for#mayhaps i could mention it whenever i set up my psychiatry appointment :p#i dont wanna b bipolar 😭 but then again identifying it will probably help with managing it#damng all i needed to figure out my manic depression wasnt normal was losing my uncle & the symptoms getting Much Worse#me wildly oscillating between too depressed to write and too manic to write (bc even though i was motivated i didnt have clarity of mind)#longest... sigh... imaginable... i have so many mental and physical problems and i have No idea where to start with them#...adhd first probably. if i can tackle my abysmal executive dysfunction then maybe the rest will be easier to address lol#negative/#I Guess.
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Scheming…
#chattin#taking time to draw and write out a relationship/dynamics chart for the thieves and assorted friends#bc theres. alot. and it would be nice to write it out. it would help establish my thoughts about them#its not poly/thieves but its. kind of adjacent to it. but its less shippy and more focused on how they interact-#-and behave with one another. like theyre kinda bonded together over everything. lines get a little blurred but its what works for them#and i think lumping them all together as poly/thieves is a shortcut for breaking down their character#like obv akira has diff relationships for everyone; but how do THOSE people react to others ??#like pego/ryu is real and true but also ann is absolutely there. u cannot separate them.#theyre the shujin delinquents to me LOL. they are too tightly bound together to let any external relationship split them at this point#akiras not w goro; its akira AND ryuji w goro. like akira and goro would just not work; but ryuji make its work well yknow?#goro doesnt get third wheeled w ann and vice versa bc ann and goro are good friends; they just hang :)#its like. if u could SEE the fucking string of connections making a mess of my white board in my minds eye…😭#so im trying to write it down into something that works for me#i dunno. i think its fun :) i did this for ffxv too#only that was way easier bc its just the four of them. but like. how do their internal relationships affect the overall polycule ?#anyway. inspired by that love post; that theres diff kinds of love. and kiss ryuji week LOL#bc i wanted to write a small thing with different thieves for each prompt#and im like how would their relationships differ from one another ?#ryuji and akira but also ryuji with makoto. ryuji w haru. ryuji w yusuke. its like.#u cant use the same thing from most pego/ryu fics bc they DIDNT meet the same way#waugh.#rambling#just know that im insane. i have all these wips and nothing FINISHED. waaa.#this is what that post meant about being obsessed over bad media LMAO. this is just what happens#u stay up thinking about fake polycules from a game that came out seven years ago#i think….#WHAT. 2016???#EIGHT years ???#funny bc i was thinking about how ffxv was eight yesrs old and i am still a mess over it#well. could u imagine if i played p5 when it LAUNCHED instead of in 2020???
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Ok this is a little awkward helped my two friends with their writing part of the proficiency exam and got them higher scores than i did for myself 💀 i still got a C1 in it ofc but less points than them and i wont stand for that
#imagine them qualifying for erasmus when they can barely utter a sentence in eng and me not getting in when i did all the work for them💀💀#this is actually hilarious this is such a me moment#fuck i hope its possible to redo it my ego is too high for this situation#technically i should be proud bc their high results are literally mine i did that shit they didnt even lift a finger#but im a jelaous bitch and i cant stand the thought of them getting praise for it when it should be me getting it 😇#i feel like thats a reasonable thing to think tbh 🥰#anyways lol idgaf abt the speaking part but the writing part i should have done better#i feel like i shouldnt be this pressed abt this bc after all i got a C1??? thats loterally the best result#but how can i sleep at night knowing ive got 506 points meanwhile they have over 550 🥸🥸🥸 these points are mine 👿👿👿#dont get me wrong i like helping them and i dont regret it and getting them good scores was the point#but also i still gotta be the best and like i literally am the best? out of the three of us i am so the scores should show that 😇#lool#ale zjebalam widzowie#dzisiaj ostatni dzien na robienie tych testow ciekawe czy jak zrobie drugi raz to bedzi sie liczyc ten wynik#ale mi sie tak nie chce drugi raz tego pisac tylko ze sie boje bo 506 takie niebiezpievzn jest bo pewnie sporo osob lepiej napisalo#a ja chce miec secured kwalifikacje dalej
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aime tachi plot: everything has to make sense, there are rules for the story even tho its self indulgent, yadda yadda, character development, progression consistency
dreamdom hearts plot: anyways the dream works au versions of fe characters and my oc recruit enjoyable single dw villains to go have slightly creepypasta shenanigans with a presumably dead oc
#honestly i love them both#and yes ive got basically nothing on dreamdom lol#it was like an 'airplane thought' and i didnt realize how small the amt of d w movies im attached to is (or how many things d isney#technically owns)#i think its partly that the d w stuff im way more attached to but theres less of it (shrek my beloved. k f p is absolutely amazing and r ot#g is beautiful. cp un is also just my heckinc childhood even if im not attached as much- more the books lol) but theres just more d stuff t#flesh out teh au#i do think if i am ever assed to it wuld be baller to actually write dreamdom bc its hilarious and weird#and i love the thus spoke rohan/creepy pasta vibes of the tone that i have the idea for#i feel like this quartet does more hecked up stuff. like theyd go into a world doomed to disappear. like a lostbelt or something#they would watch as the universe unravels around them and only realize later they were in a lostbelt.#which would actually be hecking amazing of a crossover if the bois (tm) got to meet sal or pucca#sal bc hes my fave or pucca bc he has the shrek vibes that senpai also has#like imagine them meeting pucca and everyone- every one of them is charmed by this weirdo.#pucca is playing the fool and entertaining the dying faeries. little by little the squad realizes something is off.#then the world just up and starts dissolving but pucca is still trying to joke around and make people laugh#dm like. grabs him by the throat or something. why are you doing this#and then pucca just laughs again and smiles even tho hes crying and looks scared sh-less.#im a fool arent i? im the servant of the greatest fool of all time. if no one remembers me if no one remembers this it doesnt matter.#just that i made people laugh. just that i was able to keep a good. witty. honest fool in this world till the end.#the squad realize the true gravity of the situation and are forced to watch pucca and everyone else just get. yeeted. esp with the knowledg#that their events will get written over by canon and pucca probably wont even exist.#haha little do they know hes alive and well bc he had that strong bond with mashpotato#also <- this entire tag thread is gonna sound rediciouls in like 5 yrs time and cringe af#unless i remember the deets lol#au ramblings
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oh god so many of the tags got messed up y did i type this in tags i thought it was gonna b a small ramble but no some1 help theyre in my head
i want to put bart in a time loop. konbart time loop au. is this anything
#i dont want it 2 seem like im setting him up#UHM YES YES !!!!!!!!YESSSW?A?FALKJFLJA !#SOME1 PUT THAT CRITTER IN A TIME LOOP RN!!!!!!!!!!!#BUT LIKE FUCKIONG OP RATTLES UR BRAIN SHAKES U#bart bing in such disbelief he doesnt even REALIZE he traveled back in time & created a whole timeloop like im on my knees pounding the gro#d w/my fist shaking it up in the sky thats so#I TOTLALY VIBE W/THE WHOLE BART TELLING KON HES GONNA DIE & HE CANT DO ANYTHING & KON JUST BELIEVING HIM#i think it would b awful if on that day kon actually lived a bit longer than the rest THEN died#haha false sense of security kachow#like it would b bart trying 2 save kon whos fighting in metropolis#then after that day it turns in2 bart trying 2 keep kon out of metropolis? ig??? something like that idk#brain goes brrrrr @ time loops i love time loops sm i think about them all the time its like my trope fhdsjgfkjshd /hj BUT LIKE FR#also kon would definatly believe bart every single time bart brings up the fact hes in a timeloop((when he does)) like the HHHHHHHHH CAUSE#im thinking about the fucking whole “i know bart. bart wouldnt lie about this” THING#idk how angsty the original plot of ops timeloop idea goes but finding stuff out in 1((or multiple)) of the days then that day gets reset#but ur now burdened w/that knowledge but u dont want 2 say anything bc it seems invasive now bc this day kon didnt tell him but “yesterdays#kon did & if bart brought up anything “yesterday” kon said it would b just like awkward?? omg english hard IT WOULD FEEL LIKE invasive was#i want 2 talk about this w/kon again bc it helped him emotionally((or whatever?)) but edit;ILOST WHERE THIS TAG WENT HELPPPP#actually good word 4 this but its not invasive but it is? bc kon hasnt had that specific conversation w/bart or experiance#also i think it would b like heart breaking 2 b like or smth like that LISTEN LISTEN I THINK SM SOMETIMES JUST ALSO ALSOSALSOAOSLO U CANT#IN REVERSE ALMOST???? bc bart PANICKED & just having an awful time having kon die in his arms((literally or not)) a lot of time#would defiantly make him say somethings & whatnot so like. it would feel awful 2 dump something on 1 day then it having been basically era#erased then BASICALLY JUST A CYCLE IG??? like omg i cant explain this right like my brain wont allow me okk uhm it would also feel frustrai#ing 2 all hell bc just the idea of “Y CANT I SAVE HIM” would drive bart((or any1)) mad haha i love timeloops didjaknow? fkahfdjk bUT LIKE#WHEN U GET 2 THAT POINT U START SEEING THE RAWEST FORM OF THAT CHARACTER BC THEY START 2 GET DESPRITE & personally IMO IMO i dont think bar#would b the best @ handling this @ 1st? i cant explain i mean im sure i could try but tags is not the place lol#im imagining this from kons point of view where he just sees bart everyday w/a new extreme emotion((not that he remembers the others ofc lo#liek theres prolly a day when bart completely avoided kon & explained nothing. yk????? PLS TELL ME IM MAKING SENSE KFLHSAKJF i hope i am#i need 2 continue writing my timeloop bart yj cartoon fic......sighs dies#ill stop rambling in ops tags.......kfdlashfkjds but like my yj cartoon timeloop fic doesnt have kon in it SO LIKE HHHHHHHHHH srry again...
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Can you write a social media fic with Luca and his girlfriend announcing their relationship?
my lover
luca fantilli x fem!zegras!reader
idk why i always make the readers in my social media fics related to one of the boys somehow. i feel like that’s super basic lol. if you don’t like that, feel free to imagine reader as just fem!reader <3
y/nzegras just posted!
liked by adamfantilli, _quinnhughes, and more
y/nzegras: he’s definitely a man written by a woman and that woman is taylor swift
( loading comments ! )
trevorzegras: i knew i shouldn’t have let you go to umich
trevorzegras: WHO IS THIS MAN 💢💢
lhughes_06: i know something you don’ttttt hehe
trevorzegras: LUKE KNOWS BUT I DONT 😭 IM YOUR BROTHER
y/nzegras: bc he doesn’t have a big mouth like you
trevorzegras: 😟
adamfantilli: you’ve completely converted him to a t swift girlie
y/nzegras: making momma swift proud
luca.fantilli: frfr
userone: that side profile looks hella familiar i swear
usertwo: my moneys on rutger
userthree: nah it’s def either luke or luca usertwo
jackhughes: girl zegras is growing up so fast 😪
lhughes_06: the best couple i know fr
trevorzegras: i still don’t get why he knows and i don’t
luca.fantilli: damn, he’s holding your food AND flowers?? wife him up 😤
y/nzegras just posted!
liked by seamuscasey26, umichhockey, and more
y/nzegras: my lover 🤍
tagged: luca.fantilli
( loading comments ! )
trevorzegras: WHO IS HE?? WHO IS THIS BOY?? WHAY IS NAME?? WHERE DOES HE LIVE??
y/nzegras: chill
trevorzegras: I AM CALM
markestapa: MAMA Y PAPA 👨👩👦
jackhughes: finally! i don’t think i was going to be able to keep this from z any longer
trevorzegras: JACK KNEW BUT I DIDNT??!!! THE BETRAYAL
_quinnhughes: you’re mouth likes to yap trev. she had valid concerns, that being your big mouth trevorzegras
lhughes_06: you would’ve announced their relationship the second you knew bro trevorzegras
trevorzegras: i am speechless. the hughes brothers knew before i did 😔 i’m in mourning
dylanduke25: mother & father finally announced their relationship ❗️❗️
rutgermcgroarty: one big happy family 😌👨👩👦👦
luca.fantilli: my lover ❤️❤️
trevorzegras: i will find you
y/nzegras: you will not threaten my boyfriend t. stop being childish
jackhughes: so, i’m assuming you’re bringing a plus one to the lake house?
y/nzegras: exactly 💞
yourroommate: the cutest couple ever <33
luca.fantilli just posted!
liked by yourbestie, tyler__duke5, and more
luca.fantilli: i’d marry you with paper rings 🤍🤍
tagged: y/nzegras
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seamuscasey26: bro she immediately had you wrapped around her finger the MINUTE you saw her
markestapa: SIMP
rutgermcgroarty: SIMP
dylanduke25: SIMP
nolan_moyle: SIMP
lhughes_06: SIMP
nick_moldenhauer: SIMP
luca.fantilli: please get out of my comment section all of you
userone: they’re so cute!! <3
usertwo: THE TAYLOR SWIFT REFERENCES
trevorzegras: i guess he ain’t that bad 😒
jamie.drysdale: bro stop beating petty 😭
userthree: HE’S A GOOD MAN SAVANNAH
adamfantilli: making my best man speech as we speak
y/nzegras: that won’t be happening for a couple of years bestie
adamfantilli: never too early future sister-in-law
yourbestie: i’ve had mine ready since the sixth grade adamfantilli
adamfantilli: i see how it is 😑 yourbestie
y/nzegras: i love you so much 💓💓
#drysdalesworld works!#drysdalesworld#hockey#hockey x reader#nhl x reader#luca fantilli x y/n#luca fantilli x reader#luca fantilli#social media au#social media#smau#drysdalesworld requests!#luca fantilli au#umich hockey x reader#umich x reader#umich hockey#umich#umich boys#umich boys x reader
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constructive criticisms
main masterlist ✧ kinktober masterlist ✦
kinktober : day two - afab!ficauthor!reader x javier peña
prompt : virginity loss [ 18+ mdni ]
word count : 5.1 k
summary : javier peña has been a thorn in your side for months, the last thing you need is for him to find out you write dirty fanfiction
warnings, etc. : language, fluff, smut, protected sex, p in v sex, oral m!recieving, fingering, mutual masturbation, viginity loss (duh), innocence kink sorta, squirting, reader is completely clueless when it comes to sex, javier is a dumb sweetheart in this, plot w a little porn lol
a/n : yippee! this is an idea ive had floating around for a bit and this seemed like a good opportunity to do it! easily the longest of the kinktober stuff lmao which is why i didnt want this to be day one cause i didnt want to set a precedent haha. also i hate this but it's october so like i can't do much about that lmao. AND the edit was rushed bc i gotta get to work so apologies for any errors!!
“What’s that?” You slam your laptop shut the moment you hear his voice.
“Nothing.” You hadn’t heard him come into your office yet here he is, looming over your shoulder.
“Didn’t look like nothing.” You can’t stand the mocking smile on his face.
“Did you need something?” You do your best to sound patient.
“I’ve got some suspect photos I need you to identify.” He’s still grinning from ear to ear as you hold your hand out for the file. You flip through the pictures before tossing them onto the pile of paperwork you’ve been trudging through. You’re waiting for him to leave but he just stays in place behind you until you spin around in your chair.
“Is there something else?” You cross your arms in front of your chest, glowering at him.
“What were you working on?” For god's sake, drop it.
“Get out of my office Peña, or I won’t process your suspects.” Thankfully that gets him to leave, sighing as he closes the door behind him. Once you’re sure he’s not coming back you open your laptop again, quickly closing out your tabs.
The last thing you need is for Javier fucking Peña to read your Star Wars fanfiction.
He makes your life hell around the office enough as is. He makes fun of how you dress, he only ever asks you to file his paperwork, (despite the dozen others who are just as capable.) and you’re pretty sure he stole your lunch one time. He’s just in general a nuisance. (And it doesn’t help that he’s gorgeous and knows it.)
It’s not like you’re ashamed of your writing, you’ve mentioned it in passing to some of your friends around the office but Javier is different. He gives you enough grief without knowing how badly you wanna fuck Anakin Skywalker, you can’t imagine how much worse thing would get if he found you’re writing.
So you get back to work, trying to forget the interaction entirely.
You like to work late on fridays, it makes things easier, you don’t have to come in early on monday and no ones around to bother you while you work. You’re just about done with everything as you gather up all the finished documents, going from empty office to empty office as you leave the respective papers on each person's desk.
You’re nearly done, you’ve just got Javier’s suspect list to deal with as you step into the bullpen to deliver it you’re surprised to see him still sitting at his desk, everyone else is gone, only his desk lamp and computer monitor light the large room. You approach quietly, wanting to get this done as quickly as possible so you can just go home. You’re about to clear your throat to get his attention when you freeze in place.
You recognize the website he’s on.
You’d know that red bar anywhere.
There’s no fucking way.
You feel your face getting flushed, a deep shame settling in your stomach as you take another step forward just to be sure.
Archive of Our Own beta
And just below that, the name of your favorite song, but more importantly, the title of your fanfiction.
You’re so fucked.
You feel a mess of angry tears starting to pool in your eyes as you hear him groan.
That somehow hurts worse.
Not only is he reading it, but he also thinks it’s so bad he’s audibly expressing it. You’re livid, and humiliated, you should spend this weekend looking for a new job because he’s about to become insufferable. Knowing him, everyone will know about it before you even get in on monday.
In your rage you walk forward noisily, tossing his files down onto his desk, turning, planning on glaring at him once before leaving, hoping he doesn’t see how truly upset you are.
Nothing could have prepared you for what you’re met with. You’re expecting a smirk or maybe even a look of disgust, instead he’s gritting his teeth, his hair sticking to his forehead, a visible sheen of sweat on his face and most prominently, his hand haphazardly shoved down the front of his pants.
You both realize the predicament you’re caught in at the same time. You stare way too long. Eyes lingering on the exposed skin where his shirt rides up, a trail of hair running down his naval. Neither one of you moves until you finally snap out of it, squeezing your eyes shut and turning on your heel, walking as quickly as possible towards the exit when you hear the squeak of his chair on the floor as he calls out your name. You don’t dare turn around though, not slowing your pace until you’re out of the building and in your car.
Thankfully he doesn’t pursue you further as you drive home as quickly as possible. Hands tightly gripping the wheel the entire time. You can see your phone blowing up in your bag, the inside dimly lit the entire length of the drive. When you pull into your apartment building’s parking lot. You grab your bag and hurry inside, desperate to just go to bed and forget everything that just happened, ignoring the throbbing between your legs from what you just witnessed.
You step inside your studio, locking up behind you as you toss your bag onto the bed, shedding your clothes and stepping into the bathroom, praying that a cold shower will clear your head.
It doesn’t.
You feel just as hot and frazzled as you did before. Maybe he was just trying to mess with you. If that’s the case then now he’s just sexually harassing you.
Stupid fucking Peña.
You pull a tank top over your head and throw on a pair of panties before collapsing on your bed. You don’t want to look but you won’t be able to sleep if you don’t, so you reach into your bag, retrieving your phone.
Just as suspected you have an endless amount of messages from the man himself. You're about to start scrolling through them all when you read the most recent one.
[ I’m coming over. ]
Son of a bitch.
You quickly scroll through the previous messages.
[ I’m sorry, are you okay? ]
[ Call me or I’m coming over. ]
[ Please just text me back. ]
[ I really liked your story. ]
[ I’m sorry. ]
There’s about a hundred similar messages but one stands out to you more than anything else.
He liked your story.
Why does that make your face burn up?
You start typing, telling him that he doesn’t want to find out what’s gonna happen if he shows up but you’re interrupted by a knock on your door. You trip over yourself as you rush to your dresser, pulling on a pair of sweatpants before peering through the peephole.
Sure enough, there he stands, he looks exactly like you’d left him, shirt untucked and askew, hair a mess, except now his hand isn’t in his pants. You’re about to reach over and turn your lamp off when he clears his throat.
“I know you’re in there, your car was out front.” Well, so much for pretending you aren’t home. You hesitantly unlock the door before pulling it open, plastering a scowl on your face.
“What do you want?” You try to look stern but you know you probably just look nervous.
“I just wanna talk.”
You’re hesitant but you open the door fully, letting him in as you return to your bed, sitting and pointing at the loveseat in the corner for him. Neither one of you speaks, you watch as his throat bobs, he won’t look at you, staring at his hands instead.
“How did you get my address?” You finally break the silence.
“Your file.” He says sheepishly.
“You can’t do that! That’s an invasion of my privacy!”
“That’s what you wanna be mad about?” Fair enough.
“Fine, why did you do it?” You don’t like that he’s here, in your tiny apartment, the memory of him splayed out in his chair takes up all the space.
“Which part?” He finally looks up at you, meeting your gaze.
“Why did you read it?”
“I was curious.” He looks truly apologetic, it almost makes you want to believe him.
“Really?” Your tone drips with sarcasm.
“You seemed really defensive, I wanted to see why.” It seems genuine but you know better.
“You wanted to embarrass me.” You say plainly.
“Why do you act like I’m out to get you?” His brows furrow and his mouth settles into a frown.
“Because you are.” You say it matter of factly, you honestly can’t believe he’s acting like he doesn’t know.
“I don’t understand what I did that makes you hate me so much.” You’re tempted to soften your gaze, but the last thing you need to do if this is all just some trick is appear vulnerable.
“You can’t be serious.”
“Please, enlighten me.” He throws his hands up in exasperation.
“You despise me! You torment me every single day!”
“Really? I torment you?” He points an accusatory finger in your direction.
“You make me do your paperwork every single time, even when there are plenty of other people who are capable of it.” You feel the urge to stand and have this argument, you’re getting heated in several ways now.
“You do it better than everyone else.” He shrugs like it’s a valid excuse.
“Bullshit.” You snark as he puts his head in his hands.
“And I like the excuse to see you.” He mumbles before looking back up at him.
“You make fun of how I dress.” You’re quick to change the subject, not wanting to fall victim to his charms.
“I do not.” His voice pitches up defensively.
“You said I dress like your grandma.”
“That was a compliment.” He can’t be serious.
“How the fuck is that a compliment?”
“I love my grandma very much.” He sounds serious.
“You’re a nightmare.” You fall back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, your head swimming with confusion.
“Have you ever considered that I just wanted to be around you? You assume that I just liked to bother you but maybe I just like being near you.” He stands as you sit up, a look of honest upset on his face.
“You expect me to believe that you did those things because you like me? Are we in middle school, Peña? You could have just asked me out instead of pulling my pigtails on the playground.” You stand, not liking the power imbalance of having him towering over you where you sit.
“I did, you said no.” He crosses his arms and you scoff.
“You did not, you can’t just make things up to get out of this conversation.” You poke a finger into his chest but he just brushes it away.
“I asked you out to lunch two weeks ago and you said no.”
“I think I would remember that if it happened.” His anger fizzles out a bit as he looks you up and down.
“I may or may not have thrown your lunch out that day so you’d be more likely to accept.” He gives you a sheepish look. “But you were so mad you brushed it off.”
“That was a serious offer? I thought you were messing with me.” He just stares at you, wide puppy dog eyes you have to turn away from lest you fall for this act. You don’t get a moment's rest though because as you stare at the floor a particularly harrowing thought crosses your mind.
“How much did you read?” You turn back to him quickly.
“Enough.” When you turn back to him he’s staring at his hands again.
You both know what that means.
“It seemed a little familiar.” He says softly.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You want him out, now.
“Don’t play dumb, you know what I’m talking about.” You’re going to look at job listings once he goes home.
“I think you should leave.” You clear your throat, nodding towards the door.
“I’m not leaving until we talk about it.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” You sit back down on your bed, your legs feeling unsteady.
“Well I do.” He takes a few steps in your direction and you immediately regret sitting.
“I don’t care what you want, get out of my apartment, now.” You head is tilted up completely as you glare at him.
“Do you really not realize exactly what is happening here?” You can feel his breath on your face, cigarettes and spearmint. You turn your head to the side, refusing to look at him.
This is exactly what happens in your story.
“You’re an idiot.” You whisper, willing yourself not to get any more upset than you already are.
“You wrote your story about us.” He says each word sharply as you grit your teeth.
“I did not.” Now who’s just making things up to get out of a conversation?
“Everything that I did to you, he does to her.”
You don’t have a response to that. What are you supposed to say? He’s right, straight down to the confrontation where he tells her he wants her and she tells him that can’t be possible. He hates her.
He kneels in front of the bed, moving to be in your eye line and when you go to turn your head he grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him.
“I really did like your story.” You shove his hand away as he says it.
“Don’t mock me.”
“Jesus, what do I have to do to make you realize I don’t have an ounce of contempt for you?” He stands, throwing his hands up in defeat.
You finally snap.
“Maybe stop taking my shit and stop giving me extra work and stop invading my privacy and just fucking talk to me like an adult, you arrogant, immature, son of a-“ He grabs your face in both of his hands as he leans down and crashes his lips against yours, you let out a surprised squeak as he cups your jaw. After a moment he pulls back and you’re left staring at him dumbfounded.
“Now, can we please talk about it?” He mumbles before pulling you in again for a single chaste kiss.
“Okay.” You feel a little breathless at the abruptness of his actions.
“I really liked it.” He smiles now, the energy in the room changing drastically.
“You keep saying that.” You whisper.
“It’s true.”
“Wanna give me some constructive criticism?” You laugh but you can see his eyes flicker to the ceiling quickly and suddenly you want to press further.
“You know you quoted me word for word a couple of times.”
“You’re avoiding the question.” You laugh again but now you’re genuinely curious.
“I guess I thought the sex scenes were the tiniest bit unrealistic.”
“Unrealistic?” You feign offense.
“Well yeah I mean, it’s written like you’ve never had sex. They go at it all night and he never needs any breaks? And doesn’t she have like twenty orgasms? I’m pretty sure she’d be in terrible pain at that point.” He laughs softly but when you furrow your brows he stops. “I assumed because it’s fantasy that that’s intentional though.” He adds on quickly at the end.
Your embarrassment is clear on your face as his own expression goes to one of poorly concealed surprise.
“You’ve never-” He whispers, clearly shocked.
“I’ve never.” You finish his sentence, not wanting to hear it out loud.
“I mean, that’s fine.” His ears are burning red.
“I know it’s fine.” You mumble. “I’ve had opportunities to, I just… I don’t know, I guess I made it too big of a deal in my mind and now I just don’t care but I’ve waited this long and-”
“Cariña, it’s fine.” He interrupts you now, that soft smile on his face never wavering.
“Do you think my writing would be better if I had more experience?” You say it like it’s a joke but he sees right through you.
“I’m not sure, how much experience do you have just in general?” He stands, moving to sit beside you on the bed.
“Well I’ve kissed people before.”
“That’s it?” You glare at him and he coughs nervously. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that, of course.”
“I’ve been busy with work, it's just, it’s never been a priority of mine.”
“You do know… how to do it? Right?” You smack him on the arm.
“Of course I know how to do it, you read my stuff.”
“That’s why I’m asking.”
“Oh come on, you said it was good!”
“It is good! Everything but the dirty stuff is really good!” You groan, putting your head in your hands, he sits quietly beside you for a bit, rubbing your back.
“Do you want me to teach you?” He says lightheartedly.
“Seriously?” You glare at him.
“It’s the least I can do for unintentionally making your work life hell.” He’s starting to sound more genuine in his over, it sends a chill down your spine.
“So what? We just… do it?” You’d be lying if you said you didn’t like the idea of losing it to someone who knows what he’s doing.
“No we don’t ‘just do it.’ we do other stuff first.” He sounds amused but you’re glad he doesn’t outright laugh at you.
“Can you just- can you just tell me what to do?” You rest your head on his shoulder briefly and he runs his fingers through your hair.
“Is that what you want?”
“Yes please.” You mumble, feeling a strange mix of aroused and nervous.
“Well, in one of the later chapters she blows him, right?” You nod slowly. “And you say it’s her first time doing it, she probably shouldn’t have been able to just take all of him in her mouth right off the get go, especially since he’s apparently nine inches? Which is a whole separate issue by the way.” You can feel your face getting hot all over again as he explains everything like it’s obvious. “If you want to start there we can do that.” He murmurs, trying to meet your gaze but you just keep trying to look anywhere else.
“How big is it supposed to be normally?” You chew on your lip, hoping you don’t sound stupid, you couldn’t be more thankful when he once again doesn’t laugh.
“It depends, but nine inches is a bit outlandish. Have you ever actually looked at that on a ruler? It’s way bigger than you think.” He holds out the estimated size with his hands and you have to stifle a giggle.
“Fair enough.” You lean against him one last time before sliding off the bed, kneeling in front of him. “So she’s like this.” You watch his throat bob as he swallows harshly, everything is starting to quickly become real as he nods. You reach your hands towards the noticeably larger bulge in his strict jeans, stopping just before you touch him. “Can I?”
“Yeah, of course.” With his approval you gingerly unzip the restrictive fabric, watching his half hard dick spring free. He’s certainly not nine inches but he’s still intimidating. You don’t have a frame of reference but you have to assume he’s on the bigger side of things.
“You don’t wear underwear?” You scoff, trying to lighten the mood despite the combined anxiety and arousal pulsing through you right now.
“Not usually.” He murmurs, notably softer than before.
“What do I do first?”
“If you want, you can start by touching it, just do what feels right.” He reaches down to hold your face for a moment until you’re able to calm down a bit. You reach forward at a snail's pace until finally wrapping a hand around the base, jumping a bit as you feel him twitch against your palm. You slowly stroke him, just once before looking up at him, a reassuring smile on his face as you stroke him a few more times, feeling him swell until he stands fully erect. Almost absentmindedly your other hand drifts between your legs, you experimentally grind against your own hand as you continue to leisurely jerk him off, watching how he grips the sheets when you run your thumb over his drooling tip.
“What do I do next?” You look up at him.
“Spit on it, hermosa.” His voice is raspy and you sit up on your knees, a line of spit falling from your mouth onto the head of his cock, drawing a hiss past his teeth. It’s easier to stroke him when it’s wet, you experiment with different speeds, watching his reactions until in a moment of bravery you tentatively guide him into your mouth. You can’t help but feel pleased when his hand instinctively flies to your hair, not moving you in any direction, just holding you. You swirl your tongue around the tip, tasting the bitter pre-cum as you open your jaw a bit wider, letting him slide over your tongue. As you take him deeper you feel him against your throat and you quickly gag, coughing a bit as he gently pulls you off. “Go slow, don’t take more than you’re able to.” You cough again, catching your breath before taking him in your mouth again, slower this time. “Use your hands on the rest.” He murmurs, the low tone shoots through you and you quickly go back to touching yourself with one hand while using the other to stroke the half of his length that you can’t fit in your mouth.
After a few minutes you begin to moan against him as you try to reach your own peak, your hand now haphazardly shoved down the front of your pants. He’s leaning back, his pupils pitch black as he watches you, his breathing unsteady.
“You think you’re ready for more?” He says sweetly, caressing your hair. You pop off of him, watching a line of spit going from the head of his cock to your lips.
“Sure.” You feel less nervous than you thought you’d be as you stand up, wiping your mouth on the back of your hand. You feel all fuzzy and slick between your legs, your pussy aches with need as he takes your hand, pulling you onto the bed with him. You sit up against the headboard as he strips completely, discarding his shirt and shoving his pants all the way down.
You can’t help but take in the sight of him as he turns back to you.
His warm sun kissed skin, the wide expanse of his shoulders a sharp ratio to his slim waist. He’s toned but he’s soft around the edges and his cock stands proud against the thatch of hair on his lower abdomen. You tilt your head the way it curves, admiring it until he laughs.
“I want you to do something for me that wasn’t in the story.” He climbs back into bed with you, playing with the waistband of your sweats.
“Sure, what is it?” You lift your hips, letting him pull them down, tossing them off the bed.
“I want you to show me how you touch yourself.” You stare at him, a little shocked by the request, your eyes going wide.
“Why?”
“I want to see, I want you to show me what feels good.” You want to feel more self conscious but he’s completely naked and something about the fact that you’re still a little covered up helps you relax, with a soft sigh you gingerly slip your hand down the front of your panties. You go off of muscle memory, recalling what you would do if he wasn’t here.
Tracing your fingers in delicate circles around your clit, watching as he begins to touch himself, almost matching your pace. This would have been a fantasy of yours that you’d resort to when nothing else worked. Javier Peña in your bed, revealing some sort of secret attraction to you, you just never thought it would ever come to fruition.
But here he is.
Ravaging you with his eyes as you dip two fingers into yourself with a shuddering breath, his own movements stuttering a bit as you do so. With everything leading up to this it isn’t hard to feel the familiar heat building as you expertly push yourself towards it. After a few moments more you shove your panties down completely, wanting to be unencumbered as you discard them. Without them restricting you, you can easily feel that hot tightening sensation approaching rapidly. Your breathing gets heavy as you grind your fingers against your palm, you feel the familiar fiery sensation in the bottom of your stomach as you start haphazardly fucking your own hand, you keep your eyes on the way he fucks his own until you’re just about to burst and he takes hold of your wrist, stopping you.
“Please I-” You let out a frustrated whine but he shushes you with a quick peck.
“I know, can I do it?” You nod frantically, you’d like nothing more. He gently pushes two fingers into you, you gasp in surprise at the sudden stretch as he slides them in and out slowly, continuing to jerk himself off with his other hand as he watches how you eagerly suck him in.
It doesn’t take much from there.
His thumb mirrors the motions you did against your clit and that’s all he has to do to push you over the edge. Your cunt spasming around his fingers as he works you through your orgasm, hot white burns the edges of your vision and you keep your eyes open long enough to watch as he squeezes the base of his own cock, groaning as he makes his own attempts not to finish. You're vaguely aware of him murmuring something that sounds like praise in Spanish as you get your bearings, he slowly removes his fingers, leaning forward on his knees to kiss you. You catch your breath through the kiss until finally he pulls back.
“Do you want me to fuck you?” His breathing heavy as he nudges his forehead against yours.
“Is it gonna hurt?” You’re more curious than nervous at this point.
“It shouldn’t, and if it does I’ll stop, okay?” He hops off the bed for a moment, searching through his wallet before tossing you a condom.
“Okay.”
“And you’re sure this is what you want?” You carefully tear open the condom wrapper, handing him the rubber ring with a nod, watching how he aptly rolls it onto his cock.
“Probably wouldn’t have come this far if I didn’t.” You slide down the bed a bit so you’re mostly laying on your pillows as he positions himself on top of you. He still seems worried about you so you reach forward, taking his cock in your hand and guiding him between your legs.
You can’t help but sharply inhale as he eases just the tip into you, your eyes flutter shut and your mouth opens slightly as you sigh.
God, you wish you’d done this sooner.
It doesn’t hurt. You expected a stinging, or a tearing, instead it’s just pressure. When you open your eyes you find his squeezed shut now as he slowly works himself into you, rocking slowly back and forth. He keeps your foreheads pressed together, occasionally, bumping his nose against yours.
“Still good?” He whispers, a noticeable strain to his voice. You nod, watching curiously as he pushes his hips forward in one last motion to fully seat himself in your heat. His jaw is tense and he’s breathing through his teeth. “So fucking tight.” He mumbles before leaning forward, groaning into your mouth.
“Does it hurt?” You ask when he pulls himself away with a soft smile.
“No, it just makes me worried about hurting you.”
“I’m okay, I want you to move.” You look down to where the two of you are joined. Watching how he gently pulls himself from you just a bit before pushing back in. That’s when he bumps against that spot inside of you that suddenly has you seeing stars, your hands grip his shoulders as a moan slips out of you, the grin you’ve seen a hundred times before forms on his face, you’d once hated it but now it has you gushing around him.
“Does that feel good?” He tilts his head to the side, nudging his nose against your temple as you nod fervently. He repeats the motion, pulling out about halfway before snapping his hips forward again, your back arching when he slams into the sweet spot inside of you.
“Fuck- Peña, right there.” You whine, your nails leaving little crescent indents in the tan flesh of his shoulders. He gets into a steady rhythm with it, crashing into you with precise deliberate strokes, designed to make your head spin. He grits his teeth once more, his breath going ragged.
“Javier.” He pants, gripping your waist to hold you still. For a brief moment you almost see vulnerability in his eyes.
“Just like that, Javier.” You stammer out as he bends one of your legs up, pressing you into the mattress further as he throws your ankle over his shoulder, the new angle letting him fuck far deeper into you than you even thought possible. The soft and slow Javier starts to dissipate as he bares his teeth, his breath hot and heavy through his tense jaw as he slams into you. The second orgasm building in your stomach isn’t like anything you’ve ever felt before, it’s molten inside of you, threatening to burst as he brings a hand to your clit.
“Shit- tell me when you’re close.” He growls, your vision’s already blurring again as an unfamiliar pressure settles within you.
“I- I am.” You pant out, he accentuates each thrust with a grunt and you feel yourself slip as he applies the slightest pressure to your sensitive bundle of nerves. You’re positive you’ve never come like this before, you soak his cock, a flood of your release pulses out of you as you strangle his cock. He collapses into you, your orgasm sending him over his own edge. You feel him throbbing within you as he groans into the pillow next to you. The two of you lay in a sweaty, breathless heap for a moment until he pulls out of you with a hiss, rolling over, his chest heaving as he lays beside you.
“Now do you believe that I don’t hate you?” He gasps out.
“I might need a little more convincing.” You grin, reaching behind you to turn your lamp off before rolling yourself over so you're on top of him.
a/n : I have a very serious love hate relationship w this.
#lincolndjarin#kinktober#kinktober 2023#javier peña#javier pena x reader#javier pena fanfiction#javier pena narcos#javier pena x you#javier peña / reader#javier pena smut
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if you have paid any attention to my ramblings on my process, you know that i tend to rethink my comics and toss out a lot of work if im not satisfied with how it turned out. so i thought id share some previews of comics that have gone unseen, and why they havent been posted (yet?) in order of how likely i am to finish and/or post them :)
(under cut bc long post)
Be nice to each other: Main 4. Tomtord/Polyworld, angst. 4 pages. Matt confronts Tom and Tord on how have been acting, accidentally compelling them into saying how they really feel.
Status: abandoned.
I drew this one quite a while ago and i still really like the dialogue and character interactions i wrote for it! vampire hypnosis is a super cool concept and im definitely going to use it in the future, but this ultimately didnt pan out how i wanted it to.
Why it's not posted: while the buildup and climax are really good, this would be a huge mess to clean up. this would require some serious work both between the four of them and on my part for writing and drawing all of that!! plus, it would totally change the relationship dynamic between Tom and Tord, possibly ending it altogether (and i still have so much i want to do with them!!!)
Ed and Edd: Eduardo, Edd, Eduardo's mother. No pairings, angst. 3 pages. Eduardo can't wait to introduce himself at school, but he's got competition for the name he chose.
Status: abandoned.
Trans Eduardo is such a good concept. imagine figuring out who you are only to find out someone else already is that. of course you're going to hate them.
Why it's not posted: two main reasons. one is that i couldn't figure out how to end the comic (a recurring theme lol), but another is that i'm still not super confident with writing Eduardo yet. ...or writing children. so kid Eduardo is a challenge.
Can't tell where you're looking: Tommatt, fluff. 3 pages. Tom isn't as sneaky as he thinks he is.
Status: on my list!
Tommatt fans, i have heard your pleas i have received your asks. it's on my list.
Why it's not posted: i had a great idea, drew several pages, thought about it, and decided it sucked, actually. it can be reworked, but my motivation did not get out unscathed.
Bad (?) Dream: Tomtord, uh.... yeah thats just smut huh. 2 pages. A bad dream for one and a good dream for the other.
Status: ???
I'm not saying SHIT.
Why it's not posted: originally, it was because i didn't want to post suggestive stuff on this blog. now, it's because i found better ways to cover the concepts in this comic. Y'all will simply have to wait and see ;)
Matt figures it out: Matt, Tom. could be Tommatt. hurt/comfort. a collection of random sketches. Matt figures out how to turn into a bat! It sucks!
Status: on my list!
I've been wanting to talk about this SOOOO BAD!!! because why would you transform in a second via a poof of smoke when it could be an hour-long painful disturbing process?! honestly could be described as hurt/comfort/hurt.
Why it isn't posted: well for one it barely counts as a comic, just random sketches and a general idea. to be fair thats how most of my comics start, but... you know. i havent worked on it in a while mainly because the characters need to solve some personal problems first.
Not tonight: Tordmatt. fluff/suggestive. 2 pages. Matt's got pointy ears again, and Tord knows what that means!
Status: on my list!
TORDMATT FANS I HAVE ALSO HEARD YOUR PLEAS! Also, yippee i get to infodump about my headcanons via a comic
Why it's not posted: unfinished, and i hit a bit of a road block. usually its in writing, but this time its in the art half! so i have no idea how to get around it yet!!!
Puberty sucks fr. imagine losing an eye: Tom, Tom's mother. no pairings. angst. 3 pages. When did Tom's eyes change?
Status: on my list!
You all remember the soul-crushing existential grief that started at the same time as puberty, right? No, just me? Huh.
Why it isn't posted: layout isn't quite what im looking for :/ also, a half-naked child on tumblr, even in a completely non-sexual context, is something i am slightly apprehensive about!
Something's wrong: Main 4. Polyworld, angst/suggestive. 20+ pages. Tom doesn't feel well. Edd, Matt, and Tord try to help.
Status: actively working on it
Oh, you guys remember that poll? Haha thats funny. Yeah i'm still working on this one.
Why it isn't posted: uh its not done yet. and also i am unsure of whether or not it will be allowed on tumblr. or whether or not i want people to speculate on my entire deal.
...and while i'm here:
Communication comic part 6: IN PROGRESS!! these idiots need to establish boundaries. all of them. i believe <3
Zombie Tord part 4: ON MY LIST! i want to get through the communication comic first :3
thank u for reading all my ramblings :D! i am so fucking excited to continue working on all of my dumb shit and i am so happy that ppl like said dumb shit
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dont know if this is a hot take, also this is kinda disturbing ig bcs it involves Lilia harming baby Silver a bit 😭✨
but this is my favorite scene of Lilia in Silver's dream lol As you know, I used to be a truther that Lilia hated baby Silver at first because he is human, a human from the enemies that killed his friends-- It doesn't make sense for him to immediately love him, and I'm glad at least the story expressed that even for a bit, just in this scene.
I imagine Lilia was about to strangle baby Silver here to avenge Meleanor and Levan, even though in game, there was no gripping sound, this is what I imagine 😭✨ The way his hand closes to that fragile neck, with an awaiting strength to choke out the life out of baby Silver OHHHH ITS SOO ✨✨✨ MHM !!!! TAKING OUT THAT CENTURIES WORTH OF HATRED TO AN INNOCENT PERSON WHOSE FAULT IS THAT HE'S JUST THE REMNANT OF THE CAUSE OF YOUR MISERY MHMM ✨✨✨‼️‼️‼️
Maybe he also could imagine he couldve killed Knight of Dawn this way as well, for taking away all that he loved, but as he closes to the actual part, he didnt grip Silver's neck nor wound him, but rather wiped the tears that keeps staining his cheeks 😭✨✨✨
But if it was me who'll write this, I could let Lilia harm him for a bit but hesitates for a last moment as he remembers the peace he must keep between Malleus and humans... Imagine he picks the baby up and that fresh marks of strangulation is immediately reflected, even though in his heart, that hatred for Dawn and the Silver Owls persists, that he shouldve done it so he can clear out the guilt, there was this unfamiliar feeling of regret as he stares at the wound, but why pity this little baby that he only met for a few minutes? Its more deeply intriguing if at this moment, Lilia's heart is torn by hatred and the desire to love Silver, and makes his question about if he can truly love humans if he still abhors hate for them but theres willingness to love them 😭✨
I love stories where you'll learn how to love 😭✨✨✨🙏
#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twisted wonderland#twistedwonderland#lilia vanrouge#disney twst#twst silver#twst silver vanrouge#very brave of me to be posting this on main...#SORRY SILVER AND LILIA NATION 😭💔#this is just a headcanon lol#twst headcanons#twst hcs#twst wonderland#lian notes
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Their kids are so cute omg i'm gonna dir of adorableness
lewis: then die LMFAOO NO BUT FRR THANK UU IM GLAD U THINK SO🥹🥹💖💖💖all the love for them (esp lewis) gave me the idea to draw him deflecting all the attention so ty for giving me the excuse to post it....we luv our aloof distant boi🥰
its funny bc i was JUST talking about this recently, but i dont like pet names at all BAHAH, hence why seb and clora dont call each other anything, not even nicknames.... seb calls her the light/princess/a bird sometimes as playful and teasing jokes, but doesnt actually address her like that. and clora always calls sebastian by his full name as well, bc i was basing her dialogue/my writing off the game dialogue...bc for as close as anne and ominis are to seb, both of THEM call him sebastian in full, so maybe it was a victorian thing that nicknames werent really common? plus clora's so proper that it just feels like its in her personality to always call seb "sebastian"... i feel like if she ever DID call him "seb" he'd do a double take and be like ...HUH? who are you???......are you polyjuiced? LMAO. i do imagine seb calling clora "love" when they get older tho (not in hogwarts) bc i like how simple it is, and imagining him saying stuff like 'careful, love' makes me🫠🫠🫠🫠
aw TYY💖💖 honestly i didnt give the victorian setting TOO much thought, other than making clora more modest/not used to wearing trousers etc. like the actual victorian courting process was that youd ALWAYS be chaperoned by at least 1 other person and you wouldnt be able to kiss or anything, so the fact that our mcs are in a co-ed school with free reign already ruins that, so i wouldnt worry too much about it. a lot of it you can just wave off with the excuse that wizard society is more advanced than muggle society, which is true anyway LOL. i just kept the parts that i thought were fun/made it feel victorian ENOUGH but got rid of the stuff that was too annoying (one big example being the amount of clothing they wear....i said it in the notes for one of my chapters, but i wasnt about to make seb go through like 5 different layers just to touch cloras titty LMFAO) and no i didnt have 1 specific website i used, id just google "blank in victorian times" and look through all the articles and resources i could on that subject, and take little bits of it. SO YEA i wouldnt worry about it too much, just take what you want if you think it could enrich your story, and leave stuff out if its annoying to deal with BHAHA. and GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR WRITING!!💖💖
BAHAHA yeah sebs bark was defs bigger than his bite when it came to actually having kids/getting clora pregnant LOL. he defs loves the pregnancy part, but i feel like seeing her go through the actual labour was super hard on him/made him feel guilty bc he hates to see her in pain, let alone bc of HIM. not to mention that i imagine he would still work even once they have kids, so to leave clora with like 6 kids by herself isnt something he would have wanted to do LOL. once both lewis and celeste are in hogwarts tho i actually imagine seb and clora still doing curse breaking as well (albeit less dangerous jobs/not as far away) BUT YES having a third kid that looks like seb and is sassy like anne would be SO CUTEEE...a happy accident is a good idea too, tho i kinda like the idea of it being cloras idea.....like, she gets baby fever again now that the kids are kinda growing up and sebs like no i dont wanna put u through that again... but obvs seb wouldnt be able to resist if clora was begging seb to put a baby in her LMFAOOO its already as good as done at that point😇😇 AND THANK YOU, and im glad you liked it!!!🥹💖💖💖
@the-kcm-muggleborn AWWW ur right thats so pretty.....ty for showing me!!🥹and im glad it make you think of clora...SHE WOULD APPROVE OF THESE STUDIES👌⭐🌙
#ask#LMAO actually that pet name ask reminds me that i did have clora call seb 'sallow' after she glamoured herself to be a boy#and seb just kinda blanked and stared at her LMAO#now im laughing imagining clora calling sebastian 'seb' and 'sallow' for an entire day he'd lose his mind LMFAOO like who are you#pls stop#also it doesnt help that i dont rly like any variation of nicknames for the name clora LMAO#like clo?....ra??? lor?? i could do the classic just adding an s at the end to make it clors but that looks weird#i also feel like im the only person thats not crazy about 'darling' either idk......'love' is the only thing i REALLY like#it just feels elegant and mature and loving but also casual? in a way#i think its the casualness of love that makes it the only one i like...bc pet names as a whole are usually too embarrassing for me#but a quick 'love' added to a sentence is JUST the right amount for me🤌
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for additional context for the tags on the post i just reblogged (about the mile long mostly "constructive criticism" comment)
this is it. i have to literally zoom out to capture all of it.
and here it is with a red line showing where the divide is between the praise and the "constructive criticism"
I Literally Did Not Ask.
#speculation nation#discacc shit#tagging bc it's a comment on that one lol#this was two days before christmas too!!!! like wtf dude???#can u imagine having only started posting a month ago & then getting a comment like This??????#like. most of their points were like. they did not properly read the motivations behind a character's choices#or they were just expecting me to immediately throw shit out that i purposefully had on a slower rollout.#i was just like. god i was way too fucking polite to them#i didnt wanna be one of Those ppl who cant handle criticism. but this stuff stung so bad.#compare this to the one shot i posted a few months ago that had a person misinterpretting the character#that i initially was like 'haha agree to disagree i guess?' & then they added a mile long response to it#so i was just like. *cracks knuckles* You Asked For This#i was not as polite about that one lmfao#the security of having significantly more confidence in my own writing & being unafraid to tell off assholes#ah. entitled commenters. lmfao.
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librarians redesigned!!! by me!!! :)
the designs are free to use, i used this as a character design exercise for myself while recovering from carpal tunnel issues! read more for all the individual designs + me ranting :*
first off roland!! i included an angelica in here, i designed her before him, shes very triangular to me.. maybe a bit more messed up than roland tells us about, he is a biased narrator afterall. anyways i wanted his design to match hers nicely, so hes like a rounded square type of guy... i think projmoon designed him to be Just A Guy intentionally, so i played into it. overall the least interesting design of the bunch imo. its on purpose :)
angela !!! my baby :) an important thing here is her bangs. i dont want her hair to be able to recover from however many years she spent with the hard middle part in lobcorp, i think its cute to incorporate it still. swoopy, fluffy hair for her! and the clothes are just a bit more casual idk the librarian uniforms were kinda boring and stiff to me, as much as it does go with her character.. if u wanna be human u gotta experience the joy of sweatpants or whatever. also i didnt add color but i dont want her to be fully white<3 or fully clear skinned.. give her sunspots on her face. she finally gets to experience sun. :)
guess ill go in order of appearance lol. malkuth! whats the headband for if it doesnt keep anything out of her face!! since shes a bit more active than some of her colleagues, i also gave her a ponytail(its also for the silhouette...) also gave her some chubbier thighs.. also maybe a butler-esque coat, at least to me; i just made it a bit more form fitting than the original. playing into her personality or whatever. shes cute.. remember to take deep breaths!!
yesod!! i want to play into the skin issues a bit more, i still removed his gloves but i gave him a poncho, not just for the square silhouette im trying to build but for more coverage. also emo hair over eyes was funny. also wide flare pants for you, boy. just very square and put together in general
hod! this ones my favorite (i even cared enough to give her a pattern on that skirt!!) it was kinda bugging me how in the artbook i couldnt tell who was writing because hod's, malkuth's, and tiphereth's colors are so similar. so hod is pink now, and malkuth a bit more orange. i kinda went for a romantic poet thing here, dunno how much that worked out, but i think out of everyone you can tell shes the literature girl. gave her pigtails !! theyre cute :> also since i removed the coat decoration off of angela, i gave part of it to hod in the bottom of her coat :). cute and round!
netzach is a very strange man to me.. ellipse shape and loose fitting clothes for u. if i saw him irl i wouldnt approach him. not to say i dont like him as a character, i love him, but i want him to look like a depressed guy who would pick up art as a hobby to distract himself and it works. bro is just surviving out there. also gave him comfy clothes to make the surviving easier, down to the shoes and wide, id assume non-denim pants - maybe cotton? maybe sweatpants that dont fit around the ankle? who knows.
tiphereth!! since she's like the teen girl of the group i gave her a skater dress, converse, and a tied coat around her waist.. like how i used to wear as a teen when i was being a hater and recovering from a death in the family that changed my entire life (im still a teen ... 9 more days till im 20 as of posting this). also gave her fishnets i think she would like that. i imagine she would get headaches bc of those dumb braids on her head<3 or maybe bc her coworkers are kinda dumb<3
gebura :) round face, reverse triangle shaped body.. like a true butch lesbian stereotype.. i decided a leather jacket, docs and pants i see metalheads wear would fit her! red leather jacket, of course. also gave her spiky hair just like projmoon did<3 my favorite detail here are the eyebrows, i think their shape is rlly neat! nvm i think its just that gebura is rlly neat. anyways the eyebrows fit her
chesed my boy.. idk i just saw him and hit him with the transmasc beam and gave him , as the kids say, wh0re eyes. i wanted him to have rounder hips and just be round in general. turtleneck and cardigan combo also, i think he would like wearing that. also somewhat curlier hair, or at least wavy would do him well! and a tote bag, i dont doubt that he would go out to read in coffee shops if he could - so he gets a tote bag to carry his sociology books. i want him to look like he would give the warmest, comfiest hugs and be friend shaped
binah!! this one was the most challenging, trying to find the right place for the colors - to not use too little or too much yellow. i still dont think i got it right but this is as close as im getting. long face, long nose, siren-ish eyes.. messed up in the head bird lady that speaks like hannibal! i also dont think a dress really suits her so i opted for wide pants and a fancy black button up .. maybe angela styled her, who knows. also black fingertips which is a trait i like to give the arbiters (including an oc).. just my own little consistency thing i like to do :)
hi grandpa! ok for hokma i dont think the changes are that big? i gave him O shaped legs and his sword thing i turned into a walking cane, gave him a vest (didnt want to opt for a corset but i think he would enjoy the back support for proper posture) . also gave him a mild gradient from darker gray to lighter gray, since he IS the gray part of the ABC trio. gave him salt and pepper hair and an older face. forgot to draw it, but i wanted to give him a silicone tip for the sword so it doesnt dull out, which he can take off when recieving guests
honorary mention to go along with the angelica i mentioned with roland, i mildly changed up her twin(k) brother. i gave argalia and angie the same hair but mirrored, his a bit more curly and hers a bit more spikey, his face a bit more edgy, hers a bit rounder and kinder. not much else to say here, i liked his design as is, but wanted to add him here :)
#library of ruina#project moon#art i made#big project done wooo ! :) im proud of myself for setting a goal and sticking to it. are you proud of me. tell me youre proud of me
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hi! i know it must be kinga boring for you recive questions about castiel bc ppl are obsessed ober him for years but like the other person who asked you a few days ago, i follow you (and ply mcl) for like 10 years and ever since day one my fav boy has been tiel. till this day at the age of 22 he's my favorite and my comfort boy so i joke that he's not a fictional character anymore for me and that i know him personally at this point lol
with that being said, i bet you can imagine that over the years i've been elaborating his personality beyond what the game gives us but he's your boy, you created him therefore you know him and your word is canon, so i'd like to ask a few stuff!! nothing too big, dont worry but here we go.
tiel is an amazing songwriter and since he's very emotional not very good at express it (he does it a lot better now that he's an adult 🥹) i bet his lyricism is very deep and poetic so i have this headcanon that he at first wouldn't like taylor swift because obviously lol but then he payed attention to her lyrics and ends up basically being a swiftie since he likes her writing a lot. what you think about that?
and what kind of music crowstorm sings? like there are any bands that you listen and think "hey this would be in a crowstorm album!" (i have a playlist with this name btw lol). im probably wrong on this one but since this is my fav band i like to think that catfish and the bottlemen are the irl crowstorm, musically speaking
and the last one: another thing that gives me so much comfort is the lystiel friendship. not having present parents, being so closed off i know that lysander is such an important presence on tiel's life because he was basically the only close person he had (specially after the debrah fiasco); if lys didnt had taken the farm and went to college and bla bla bla do you think he would still be part of the band with castiel? im not sure if im mixing the canon with a fanfic i read a while ago (lol) but the band was more of a fun thing to lys, right? he liked writing most (i always imagined him getting into a literature degree or something like this). i also like to think that he helps tiel with lyrics at times, even if he's out of the band (in my head the canon is that they are best friends and pretty close till this day, i pretend lys never left our lives just like armin)
anyways sorry for this big ask 😭 i dont even know if you will read it all but if you do, thank you! and dont feel like you have to answer, i know its too much its just that mcl is my hyperfixation till this day like for real, i have a fanfic that i write still and i even plan on making it into a book sometime. except from the main characters (who is my oc) all the characters will be based on the game's ones :)
ilysm take care and stay hydrated!!
Hellow !
Aww thank you so much and for all your love for Castiel ^^
What a long ask, I'll try to answer in order.
Castiel being a swiftie. No sorry, I don't think he would be. If candy likes her, I'm pretty sure he would try to listen. Also he is an open minded person for sure, so I'm sure he would be curious to listen and study what all the hype is about, it could also help as some sort of far away inspiration, but I don't see him being a fan.
What kind of songs Crowstorm sings This is hard to answer because my musical knowledge is pretty limited and I'm sure I would miss on lot of potential groups or singers that would fit well. And it would require too much research time to have a real detailed and clear answer, but I still did check a bit and here is a little list of songs/groups that I think would have a fitting vibe for Crowstorm
City of the dead - Hollywood Undead The worst in me - bad omens Paranoid - I prevail Trauma Just pretend - Bad omens Ice Nine Kills - A grave mistake Catfish and the bottlemen sounds nice but I think its a bit too soft for what I imagine for Crowstorm.
What is his voice like I think something similar to this (not necessarily the song itself, just the voice. )
bonus, I think this song is so so fitting for Castiel's breakup song, I love it. Dial Tone - Catch your breath
Castiel and Lys friendship. It was'nt mentionned much in UL/LL because I didnt wish to bring too much drama by mentioning Lys when he was not there for the players, but of course Lys and Cast always kept in touch. It is very clearly mentionned in Lys' AL that they keep in touch, that Lys helps Castiel write songs and Cast also like to come to his farm to have a break and spend time together. You should play it if you havent, you'll have a good chunk of Cast and Lys friendship :) However yeah I can confirm that Lys would not like to do it serisouly and professionally, but he'll be all the way around to support and help Cast.
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