#i didn’t like it and it wasn’t from someone im following :( but what a dope theory!!

[skullrock]

when i was half awake this morning i went on twitter and saw a really cool theory that maya and joe were filming in the old high school radio room and maybe they’re doing like a radio show for hawkins. did anyone else see that. i can’t stop thinking abt it

[arsonistkarla]

an exploration of sexuality and gender

karla karla.

this is going to be poorly written and that’s okay

the first kiss i ever had as a child was with the same sex, it was 5th or 6th grade and i was madly in love with my best freind, we will call him A. i met A when i moved schools, i did that very often as a child. we were best friends for a while before i was in love with him, i remember it being a slow descent. one day i approached him and asked him “hey, i don’t know if i am gay or not, is it okay if i kiss you and see if i liked it”, i knew at the time he was somewhat queer in some sense. he agreed to let me kiss him to see if it was something i enjoyed. i did. after that i don’t know what i would call me and A, we weren’t dating but we weren’t not dating. the next memory i have of him is very hazy and i don’t remember all the details, but it roughly went like this. me and A did something queer in front of people we shouldn’t have, they were much older and much more hateful than we were. i went to walk to A’s house after school with him, and those boys followed us. they beat us what felt like was half to death. as they were beating us, they kept telling us that there was “no room for fags here” and that it was our fault this was happening. after the beating i walked home and A walked to his, all i did was cry in my room for the rest of the night in my bed. my mother didn’t care for she was too high or dope sick to care. i felt as alone as ever and as hateful as ever, not at the boys who beat me and my best friend. at myself for being queer and that i deserved what happened. me and A didn’t talk or see each other much after that, out of fear most likely, and the year ended and i moved again and i never saw him again for good. after that beating i refused to acknowledge myself as queer and began dating exclusively women, i hated the idea of being queer and im still feeling the ramifications of it to this day, where you are, A i hope your doing good A, hope you learned to love yourself.

when i was a freshman in high school i began to talk to someone we will call T, T and i were both in the closet. i met him in one of my classes and we exchanged instagrams, and we began talking every day and every night, i didn’t believe i had feelings for him at first, but then i began yearning for his touch and words, this was an ugly truth i didn’t want to face but i soon began flirting with him and he began flirting back. we were a candle lit with gasoline, burning fast and bright. every conversation we had with each other had to be hidden because of his religious father. after a while of this i began to beg him if we could date, he said he couldn’t because of his father, i tried to figure out a way we could in secret but he didn’t want to, i accepted this and we stuck to our dynamic of flirting and whatever two young queer men do when they are going through puberty, T and i both wanted different things from each other, he only wanted my body and i wanted so much from him. and one day i guess my body wasn’t enough for him, so he stopped talking to me, over the phone and in person, i cried and cried and cried more than i had cried over anything in my entire life. i felt as my organs were ripped out from my chest and hastily put back in incorrect places and i began searching for love in the wrong places and people, i haven’t kept up with T lately, i believe last i heard he was openly queer and doing well. i hope so and i hope he is doing alright as well, good luck to you T. it was a short but wonderful time no matter how it ended.

the summer leading into sophomore year i began to date someone who we will call S. our at the beginning was as simple as two teens who were madly in love with one other. but as our relationship lasted longer it become more and more toxic and controlling because of S. that’s not what i’m here to talk about. S talked about how they used to be Trans and how it was like for them, they enlightened me to their desire to be of the opposite gender and how they felt, but they also told me how they loved being AFAB sometimes and how they were conflicted, they soon came out to me as genderfluid. i didn’t know much about it, but that sometimes she felt like a woman, and sometimes he felt like a man, and sometimes they felt like they were neither. i did my best to support them and as i was, it awakened something within me, their feelings reflected mine and i had never thought about being Trans before, after sitting on those feelings and thoughts for so long i came out to S as Transgender. they of course accepted me and helped me be Karla in all sorts of ways; letting me cry in their arms for hours because i want born a girl, put makeup on me and let me borrow their mostly feminine wardrobe. i began to accept and use the name Karla and my queerness, coming out as Bisexual to my close friends. i put Karla on my assignments next to my other name. a mistake im sure one day i left my bag open on my dining room table as my mother got home from work, she came into my room and woke me from my sleep and began berating me and asking me who Karla is. i told her it was someone i worked with in thay class and that it was nothing to worry about but she found the name Karla on all my papers. she soon tired herself out and went to bed. the next day she took me out to our balcony outside our apartment and began to explain to me how being Transexual was a mental illness and that i need to accept myself in gods image, she kept going even after people came out and began to listen, kept going even after i begged her to stop and let me inside, she kept going even after i was on the floor sobbing. soon after that i began to recede back into the Trans closet around those i didn’t trust. once more i began to hate myself more than ever, i began to self harm again after i had recovered. and i had no hope for a what my mother called a “mentally unwell tranny”, S helped me come out of the Trans closet and i was happy. i was happy. i soon broke up with S. it was rough but in the end i was able to live with myself, and be openly queer and Trans. i don’t know how i feel about S. we dated for two years and i saw the worst and best of them. wherever you are S i hope you are happy and safe.

now as an adult i don’t know how i feel about myself, i go by my other name at my job, when people look at my necklace with Karla on it and ask who it is i tell

them that its just someone special to me, i have short hair i hate, i am hairy all over because i am not trusted with razors. i am most definitely not Karla, almost as she was just something i could live out for a while and now have to put on the shelf as i now live in reality. i lived my Trans fantasy and it died, and now i mourn it as i type out shitty stories about my past.

you can call me Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender or whatever, but i think id much rather just be called Karla instead.

i thank all my freinds who have helped me come to terms with myself over the years, especially Kylie, Mia, Ismael, Annie, Jacob, Santiago, Brady, Marlon, Abri, Laci, Milo, Landon, Koy, Seraphina, Sammy, Kyra, Devon, and many more i have forgotten, i love you all deeply

[sometipsygnostalgic]

adventure time wizard city liveblog

 well here we go

my last adventure time liveblog, i havent actually done one of these in MANY years... probably not since 2014

this takes place at the same time as obsidian?

DID-- DID CHOOSE GOOSE JUST DIE

DID BUFO JUST KILL CHOOSE GOOSE

yeah i know that’s bufo, they only made it enormously obvious, tsk tsk

@spaceacepearl​ joked about us seeing choose goose get sent to hell but i diDNT EXPECT IT TO HAPPEN

This music is i assume by one of the many musical artists Adam Muto listed on twitter, it rocks. It’s not as hardcore as Obsidian’s intro, but it’s suitably chill for the scene. 

“get offa my bus kid”

Those wizards in the left and far right groups appear to be new! 

OH MY GOD--

HELP?????? NEW PROFILE PIC TIME

HAHAHAHAH

THE MUSICAL CON DID ME GOOD, I DID REALLY LOUD AUDIBLE LAUGHTER

i bet hanna and co had fun making these signs

my favourite is the cat with “FAMILIARS HAVE RIGHTS”

cadorka..... wow

We’re not even four minutes into the ep and peppermint butler has already killed someone in front of a large group of witnesses

“this smells of DARK MAGIC” “yall kids know thats illegal right” peps watches the other kids nod before later joining in, LOL

i cant believe pep started the great gum wars and got killed by golb

SOMEONE has been playing Overwatch... 

i-- i still cant believe choose goose is fucking dead

how long was he stuck in hell for, or was that recent to together again after new death showed up 

i have to admit im not a big fan of spader, too perfect, and not in that funny way either. i hope they give him some characteristics that make him stand out. 

im getting flashbacks to OK KO and Owl House here...

Cadebra using music is a reference to Abracadaniel’s love of interpretetive dance in Play Date. 

“they only laugh because youre different” “i know” “SO STOP BEING DIFFERENT” oh my god it’s like talking to my own parents cadebra is actually... a LOT like me, less in her hyperactivity but more in her nonchalant enthusiasm and almost acceptance of the inevitable bullying because it means more time in people’s consciousness

ahhh - it’s quietly revealed here that she is responsible and a skilled magician, she is just bored of magic! i like that she parents abracadaniel instead of being downtrodden by his ramblings. 

PEP NO--- oh i see the problem, he hasn’t got his Bug Milk... sorry Martin Olsen fans, no Hunson today. At least we get one more Phil Face for the road! 

candy people in their natural habitat

Ahhh that’s Doctor Calidoneus! The voice actor was at the recent Distant Lands panel alongside Pep and Blaine’s actors. 

“pretty sure hes just trashcandy” - i like you, sassy antler lady

the mystery of how he gets clothes

and once again spader is proving to be the most irritating distant lands character of the lot, there is no subversion here. where is the subversion?  

NANI

what is going on here? are pep and peppermint the same person or not? im sure they must be, but there is something going on here with peppermint butler’s soul being trapped in the body of his child self who hasn’t got the same memories. 

OH, HYNDEN WALCH DID A NEW LINE yes this is what im here for, special over 

peppermint butler cursed himself... of course he did - Shado was correct!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT THE FUCK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

ROCK STUDENT, BLESSED ROCK STUDENT, WAS THAT POOR GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE A JAWBREAKER

love the reference to astral plane, of course pep cant astrally project because cursed pep is still inside of him 

wow, blaine, wow

they have a crush

LITTLE DUDE! COLE SANCHEZ!

i love the dynamic between cadebra and abracadaniel, imo so far it’s the heart of the special. im not really gripped by peppermint butler’s school troubles. i imagine someone else probably will be but i want to run past that shit as far as possible. 

TRDGFYGHJH

WE

WE MADE  A PREDICTION THAT WAS JUST LIKE THIS

PEPPERMINT BUTLER GETTING TURNED INTO THE FOUR COMPONENTS OF PEPPER MINT BUTT LURE WAS IN THE WIZARD CITY PREDICTIONS ART DRAW THAT HASNT BEEN POSTED YET

ILL SHOW YOU WHEN NICK POSTS THE VIDEO and then ill tell you who made the prediction because i... think it was nick himself, insanity 

who plagiarized finn’s signature???

turns out pep really DID take over wizard city!!!!

i love this band

i understand your pain peps

you probably have a bit too much in common with your mother, and i imagine it isn’t easy being turned into a kid and not being able to do stuff that came so easy. you’re disappointing yourself! (he’s literally disappointing himself)

I’m less than halfway through the special, what the fuck. I wasn’t wrong when I said Wizard City had a lot on its plate. It’s noit that I’ve been particularly gripped up to this point, though to be fair I didn’t pause at all during the other specials barring Obsidian. 

that... that poor kid is still a rock

and then the preview happened and bufo casually revealed to the audience that, yes, he killed choose goose

i dont know whats happening with pep but it seems he needs to be exorcised of... pep. which is a shame. i hope they learn to coexist. 

i have to say the background work in this special is really good! like, really damn good. 

WH

WHAT

DID SPADER JUST DIE

IS THIS WHY PEOPLE THINK PEPBUT KILLED HIM 

oh thats right - abracadaniel is cadebra’s uncle! this must be abracadniels sister. sorry, folks, he doesn’t fuck. 

Where are they? Is this anywhere near Wizard City? It’s an unpopulated prewar wasteland. 

THESE ARE JUST HUMANS

OF COURSE SHE WANTS TO PERFORM TO MILQUETOAST HUMANS

my child

is this an art style choice or did they get the people from that one studio to make this

HANNA FINALLY GETS TO FULFIL HER DREAM OF INSERTING KANEDA INTO ADVENTURE TIME

the red jacket he wears and his head pill shape is a big kaneda reference actually, which i suppose makes sense considering he’s a rival to our protagonist, but it’s a bit on the nose

bufo killed one of his own students? but why????

“MY UNCLE’S A COP”

“no one likes a rat”

i actually really like blaine, though im confused. did their VA change halfway through the special?

HOW NATURAL, NO WASTE, IT IS AN ENDLESS CHAIN

did doctor caledonius steal the trophy,,,? 

EVIL SNAIL EVIL SNAIL

MONMSTER HUNJTER DISCOVERY NOISE, this time it’s a tetsucabra

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I HAVE QUESTIONS

god i wish this is what this special was about, i miss adventure time

these remind me of the comics with their art style :) i wonder who designed them? the one on the right with pb and pep, in particular, very comics-y. 

fdgfhgf because he’s like 500

“pep can be kind of a jerk but he wouldn’t kill anyone”

sorry, cadebra, i have news for you

is doctor calednoius the true villain? if bufo’s out of the picture, she MUST be, 

ANTS

oh no, he might gbe stuck in wizard city :( 

HELP

the writing on the wall...

SPADER LITERALLY FUCKING DIED OH YM JESUS CHRIST

PEPPERMINT BUTLER’S OWN CULT????

THIS IS JUST OK KO NOW

okay im not surprised all the teachers at wizard city are cultists in worship of peps, maybe they killed spader and bufo because they bullied peps T_T

wait no, they thought spader had the potential, but sadly not

HE FUCKING KILLED HIMSELF

sorry, i was distracted by the pretty dope fight sequence and now the special is over????

fucking jesse, hes probably at least partly responsible for the cult nonsense

This credits art is by Maya Petersen!!!! Holy shit it’s adorable!

LRETGFDRGTFGMHGFHFG

LEAF MAN

DO YOU THINK THEY PUT HIM IN RETROSPECTIVELY

DO YOU THINK MAYA PETERSEN DREW THIS AND ADAM PUT IT IN THE EP RETROSPECTIVELY

HE LIVES

MAYBE THIS IS WHY CHOOSE GOOSE WENT TO HELL

okay, it’s over :) 

first thoughts out of the way: not a big fan of this special. it’s like watching a completely different show. it’s not got the PZSHAHH of the normal wizard city stuff and there weren’t a lot of funny jokes or even hearty moments in the thing. 

it suffers from a lack of invested character interactions, much like BMO did. there was not a single main cast member in the whole thing! and like i said before, much of peppermint butler’s character in the show is based on his very sweet relationship to his mother, princess bubblegum, so when they showed a single (hilarious) photo of them together it made me sad we didn’t get any scenes with them together. it would have STOLEN this episode. and they teased the hunson golf photo, and death!!! and jake appeared in a photo T_T last jake appearance. 

it also suffers because Peppermint Butler is clearly not himself, imo he was way more entertaining in the Together Again special, where we seem him back to his “normal” self. 

i dont think peps being a dark wizard was something to “kill off” exactly. i wonder what was going on there? was that actually peps, or was that a spirit he cursed himself with based on himself? we at least know in the future he does become a dark wizard again, and even princess :) this special didn’t answer those questions but lol. 

THE GOOD STUFF, because yes, there was a lot of good stuff! 

God, I’m with Aracle and Maya on this - I LOVE Cadebra and her relationship to Pep. I wish she was even in more of this - I would love to watch the adventures of Cadebra and Pepbut in their first year of school, like in the end credits.

That, imo, is where the heart of the special lay - Peppermint Butler’s attempts to impress himself, versus Cadebra’s self acceptance and desire to follow her dreams of being a goofy goober, no matter what other people thought of her. 

It turned out that Cadebra is a responsible student and family member. I really liked that. Her scenes with Abracadaniel were, somehow, my favourite in the entire special! 

I like that theres a lot of cool magic towards the end of this special, and a lot of HORRIFYING DEATH. It wouldn’t be adventure time if you didn’t randomly kill off child characters. Poor Spader, I hated you but damn, what a grim fate. 

I like that Bufo and Caledonius had this crush/hatred thing going on, but they were part of the same cult in the end. 

I didn’t like the giant peps scene at the end, the monster was extremely milquetoast compared to the madness we usually get in AT. Obsidian, for example, had the awesome Larvo design. Nemesis had some INSANE dark magic!!!!  I wish they drew more from that episode. 

Considering how much Steve Little appears in this special, I do feel bad for Mace (little Peps). He said he would have really benefitted from coaching, but recieved none. He had to re-record his lines 3 times! Judging from his description of events, Wizard City was a hard time for him. 

The wizard school did remind me, heavily, of both The Owl House and OK KO. Personally I was hoping AT would offer me something more insane, but I do love both of those shows, and I know Wizard City was on a really tight schedule. 

I think they should have spent less time on the school bullying plot, and skipped straight to MURDER. 

We did have a cold opening, not on par with Together Again’s at all, but damn!

I am wondering where I would put this in the watch list? I do think it should sit after Obsidian as the third special. The intro scene makes it clear this takes place at the same time as Obsidian!!!

Well, that was it, the last ep of AT for the next few years at least T_T

i think together again was the better finale, definitely. but wizard city feels pretty detached from AT for me, despite the familiar characters it tonally isn’t like the show other than the awesome brutal death scenes. I thought the last 11 minutes was easily the best in the special! Which, honestly, is how it should be, though I do wish it gripped me more. Maybe I’m just not the target audience for Wizard City? It feels like something I would find very compelling if I was a bit younger! 

[descendantofthesparrow]

Harry Hook x Reader - soulmate au! lost things

=

A soulmate. Something everyone had, whether they be on the Isle or in Auradon. You had watched your mom and dad hand things the other had lost back to each other, either be a pen or a full stack of papers.

Oh, did I forget to mention? Soulmates found whatever the other lost. So say one lost their phone? The other would find it moments later.

Sometimes appearing mid-air and dropping into your hands. Your mom had once lost her wedding ring when she was cooking, your dad decided to be all dorky and “propose” all over again.

It was one of your fondest memories of them, it always filled you with the hope that one day, maybe you and your soulmate would be that way.

Speaking of your soulmate.

A pair of headphones appeared out of the corner of your eye. You smiled and picked them up, examining them.

They were a dark red with black leather for the ear cushions, little silver and gold bits and bobs decorated the headband and outer shell of the speakers, a small cross bone skull painted on the left ear.

You knew for a while that your soulmate was and isle kid, from the state of the items he lost. Always run down or used, broken, worn down, and sometimes, things you had “lost” before that he had lost again.

Like this pair of headphones, it was a pair of headphones you had bought last month and “lost” them, and now soulmate had lost them again.

You tossed them onto your bed and continued to work, knowing you would soon forget about them and they would return to your soulmate.

=

Harry growled in frustration as he tore through his room for his headphones. “goddamnit!” he yelled, tossing up his pillows, hearing them thud on the ground behind him a moment later.

“where the hell are meh headphones!?!” Harriet rolled her eyes behind him, messing with the threads of her new shirt (mostly new, her soulmate had lost it recently)

“yeh dolt it's with yer soulmate, yeh will get it back soon jus’ wait” she muttered, sneering as Harry turned to her and stuck his tongue out.

“shut up Hettie” he jeered back, grabbing his discarded pillows and tossing them back on his bed.

Somehow throughout the years, his soulmate had lost a lot of of….comfortable things, like soft fluffy pillows, blankets, hoodies, and even a full bag of food!

Sometimes he thought his soulmate purposely lost things to give him stuff. It was one of the reasons he wasn’t starving to death or sleeping on a lump of stone for a mattress so he wouldn’t complain.

“harry” he looked at his sister, pressing his lips together and shrugging.

“what” he stressed, eyes drifting to where she was pointing.

There on his dresser was his headphones, though they weren’t there a moment ago “told ya”

Harry glared at her and snatched them off his dresser, tossing them around his neck and stomping out of his room.

=

“(y/n) I swear I can't find my new shirt! I just got it last week!” Audrey whined about her shirt, it was a non-expensive one but it was comfortable and breathable. You sighed through the phone.

“Audrey, if you can't find it, your soulmate has it, so just chill okay?”

She sighed “I know I know but that was a good shirt!”

“just buy another one?” you suggested, knowing she could easily do that.

“but that was-what the-oh” you heard something in the background and you sat up.

“new thing?”

“uh…yeah? It’s a ….bracelet?”

“whats it looks like?” you trapped your phone between your cheek and neck, continuing to work on your essay.

“silver, bunch of….piraty things on it? Is the best way to describe it I guess, and some red gems on it too”

“sounds cool” you laughed, setting your phone down and turning on speakerphone. “so hows you “vacation” going?”

“pretty good, I got my hair done”

“I saw, it looks dope” you complimented. Audrey hummed back.,

“I like it too, so anything new for you?”

“yeah, headphones, and a ring” you glanced at the red ruby ring on your desk, the teeth of the skull clamping around the jewel” “so you’re sure its an isle kid?”

“has to be, everything they lose is used, the only thing that was relatively new was stuff I lost”

“hmmm, well you know I really don’t like isle kids”

“correction, you don’t like Mal” you interrupted quickly, knowing she liked Evie to an extent and Carlos and Jay weren’t really on her radar.

“yeah yeah, but if they are an isle kid I won't be mean, if it's your soulmate it's your soulmate!”

“same for you Aud” you teased, her lost things were also very…isle like, but she constantly denied it.

“oh shut up”

You glanced at your clock and sighed “I gotta go, I have a thing to do”

“im guessing cotillion?” Audrey muttered.

“yeah, sorry Aud”

“its fine, its not your fault Ben was spelled”

“I know, but still” you murmured, saving your essay and closing your laptop “alright I really gotta go!”

“bye! Talk to you later kisses!” she made a kiss sound and hung up, leaving you to get to jane to help plan cotillion.

=

You jumped as Lonnie burst into your room, speaking quickly “bens on the isle kidnapped by pirates and I need your help to convince Jay and Carlos to let us help!”

You stayed silent as you processed her words before leaping out of bed and quickly getting dressed.

“let's go!” you grabbed your sword and ran out with Lonnie,  running around to the front.

“we’re coming with you guys” Lonnie stated, surprising  Jay and Carlos, the two boys laughed nervously.

“what? We don’t need swords at the…..waffle hut?” Carlos's smile dropped and he slowly turned his head to look at jay.

“really?”

“look its either you take us or….we’re gonna have to tell fairy godmother” jay and claros glanced at each other and sighed.

“alright, but (y/n) do you eve-“

You snorted and lifted up your arm, revealing the P tattoo you had gotten a couple of years back In honor of your uncle jack.

“There are some things I haven't told you guys” you laughed, pushing past them and heading to the limo.

=

Harry raised his brow as beasty boy kept glancing at his wrist “what are yeh lookin’ at beasty” he huffed, pointing his hook at him.

“…that bracelet looks very familiar for some reason” Ben muttered, squinting at the red and (f/c) beaded bracelet.

“so wha’ its meh soulmates” Harry rolled his eyes, turning around and strutting around the mainmast.

Bens eyes widened, that’s where he recognized it, it was (y/n)s! maybe-

“Finally!!!” ben was ripped from the mast, and pushed to the plank. “so lets get this started shall we!!” Ben looked to the group had arrived, relieved to see you among them.

No matter how pirate someone was, it was hard to beat the daughter of the king of pirates after all.

(y/n) turner.

=

You glanced around, some of these guys were hardly holding their swords correctly. You kept your sword behind your back since Mal had said to keep them hidden so Uma didn’t know anything was up.

Soon, mal passed the wand to uma, ben being handed back to her. As the pirates yelled in victory, you locked eyes with the tall red-coated boy, his bright ocean blue eyes sending a shock down your spine.

‘the hell’ you thought to your self, shaking your head, about to run back to the tunnel when uma screamed and broke the “wand”

“NO!” your eyes widened, watching as Uma drew her sword “YOU DO NOT GET TO WIN EVERY TIME!” Carlos dug out the smoke bombs and launched them at the pirates.

You sighed, drawing your sword and flipping it in your hand, cringing as mal fumbled to grip ber sword correctly.

“mal space your fingers and move your thumb to the right!”

You leaped down the deck, landing in a crouch next to mal. “you focus on ben, ill handle any that come” mal looked startled but obeyed, running up the deck to get to ben.

Uma locked eyes with you, pointing her sword at you “get her!”

You smirked, twisting around and dodging several pirates blades, heh, your baby cousin could fight better than these goons.

Uam huffed, deciding to deal with you herself. You smirked as she ran at you, easily blocking and parrying her attacks.

She was quite good, possibly taught by one of the OG pirates that lived on the isle, but still.

She couldn’t best you. You disarmed her and tripped her, wincing slightly as she hit the deck with a loud smack.

“who the hell-“ her eyes widened as she caught sight of your wrist. You smirked.

“honor among thieves young captain” you purred, embedding her cutlass beside her head. As you ran to head back to the tunnel, something appeared mid-air.

A silver hook.

…

…

…

Oddest fucking timing you got ain't cha soulmate??? You ignored it, strapping the hook to your belt loops and running, not seeing umas jaw drop as that entire event happened.

“holy shit” she muttered, jumping as Harry popped up behind her and growled.

“I lost meh hook!”

=

Later in the limo, Evie finally caught sight of the hook, her eyes widening “h-how did you get Harrys hook? You never fought with him??”

“Harry who?” you muttered confused, grabbing the hook from your waist and holding it up “wait was this Harry apart of the battle?”

“yes! He was uma first mate! The one with the red coat!” Evie stressed.

You were silent for a moment before facepalming “this popped out of the air just as we were leaving.”

“oh shit” the car sounded back, Harry Hook was your soulmate.

=

A year later, the hook still sat on your dresser, delicately placed in a display case, and polished every week.

You had been unable to forget about it, unable to send it back to harry. So you kept it, not being able to go to the isle and give it back personally.

Until one day.

You dove underwater, glaring back up at the surface as you saw Audrey disappear.

You were really glad you followed your gut and took the hook with you to Janes birthday party.

Breaching the surface you took heavy breathes, swimming to the edge and lifting yourself up onto the grotto.

“come on, we gotta warn the others!” you lifted jane out of the pool.

“you go do that, I have to get my stuff!” you took your bike back to the dorms, changing out of your wet party clothes and into your gear.

You slid your loose leather jacket up to just below your elbow, putting on your gloves and ring.

Black pants with reinforced knees, calf-length steel toe boots, and your sword, hook once more on your belt loop.

As you stepped out of the dorms, you locked eyes with the vks.

“hey” you yelled out, smirking as they all jumped. “where the hell have you all been??”

“uh, getting hades ember???” mal looked you up and down, raising her brows “why are you dressed like that?”

“because I can” you snorted, locking eyes with harry “hey, I think this is yours” unhooking the hook, tossing it to harry.

He fumbled to catch it, jaw-dropping as he realized what it was “how-when did yeh get me…..oh…OH!” his cheeks turned pink, looking away from you and into his shoulder.

“yep, how’d you lose it in the first place?” you asked, watching as Harry glared at jay. “ah, gotcha” you snorted, following the group out as they had decided to go to the castle.

=

You smiled as the bridge began to build, your parents just behind you, hands on your shoulders. “you ready (y/n)” your mom asked, brushing a piece of cake off your cheek,

“yeah, and I think you guys will like him” you snickered. Your parents looked at each other, smiles on their faces.

“and why is that?”

“hes a pirate” you laughed, watching as Harry stepped over the bridge/Auradon border and locked eyes with you, a bright smile on his lips. He started to walk over to you.

“like mother like daughter” your dad laughed, grinning widely as you ran forward into Harry's arms.

“found yeh” Harry laughed, nuzzling his cheek into your hair, holding you tightly to his chest.

“I think our daughters in good hands” your mom hummed, intertwining hands with Will and walking over to greet harry.

you turned, smirking as you saw a black haired pirate girl hang Audrey recently lost necklace in front of her, Audrey cheeks Turing dark and she buried her face in her hands.

“wait Hetties soulmate is Audrey?....whoa” harry laughed, watching as his sister kissed the princesses forehead.

“i knew it” you chuckled, taking Harry arm and dragging him to meet your parents half way. “i never told you who my parents were right?”

“no?”

“yeah my moms Elizabeth Swan and my dads Will Turner.”

“WHAT?!”

---the end---

-this isn’t my best but I just had to get this idea out of my head, inspired by tik tok POVs with this au, might do a more in depth version of this--

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[childish-ish]

I hope you write for Michael Myers, I just need him with a platonic gn s/o. Like, s/o is just 'oh u killed someone? Goodjob, bud, have some dinner' THEN CASUALLY PATS HIM IN THE BACK. Idk why but I need more platonic fics aaaaaaaa

YES I DO lmaoaoosnfkef im super excited my first ask!! i hope i dont disappoint!! im writing this at like 3 am lmaaoaosl!!!

that one guy with the blood on his clothes, you know him?

pairing: michael myers x platonic! gender-neutral! reader

You absolutely knew you were screwed when you heard the unusual stomping of possibly large feet. You shiver - you knew you shouldn't go up there. That's what most horror movies taught you.

You also knew that you probably shouldn't call out to the unknown being! But you did anyway because who cares. Maybe if you seem cooler than you already are, maybe - just maybe - they'll spare you.

Hm. You thought, what a nice thought! But.. press x for doubt. Ah, shit. What if the dude mudered somebody?! Ah fuck. What should i do? Ah FUCK WHAT DO I DO, GOD SHOULD I CALL THE POLICE?!

"Uhh.." You hear yourself say. "I, uh - I know you're up there! Uhh.. fuck. Do you want to - " You immediately pause. That was so stupid what the fuck me. Do you want to come down?? That was what you were going to say - but instead said this:

"COME DOWN OR I UHHHH EAT YOUR CHILDREN - "

You couldn't help but scream internally. You couldn't believe you just said that - actually, in real life. Why the fuck would you say that? The person probably doesn't have kids. Maybe they do - you don't know them - do you?

A loud squeaky creak interrupted you from your thoughts. You peer up, picking up your chin from resting on your purlicue to see a large man on the top step of your rickety old fucking stairs.

"Ahaha!" You laughed pompously, putting your hands on your waist, "I see you don't want your children to be eaten! Good choice! Come on down!"

Despite your easy-going-ness on the outside, you were sobbing disgusting-ly inside.

The man made no move.

You switch on the light to your right - how convenient!

The hallway and the stairs lit up.

That man was the boogeyman of Haddonfield. In your fucking house.

"Uhhh.." You trail off. Noticing the absolute fucking mess on his clothing - hm. What was he wearing? Some weird uhhhh fucking outfit that a guy fixing a car would wear, you suppose.

"I see you've got blood on your hands ol' chap!" You might die - but you might as well have some fun!

"Howza bout we go fix you up some dinner and get your cleaned up! Huh? Hows'sat sound?"

You got scared and literally almost pissed your pants when he stepped down from the top stair. He was threatening you wasn't he?

"I'm sorry!" You weep, falling into your knees dramatically. "Don't kill me! Take my money! My food! But not the cat - "

A shadow looks over you - your thoughts immediately- 'How'd he get there so quietly??'

"Uhh.." You trail off, before looking away from the creepy mask that mocked a human face. Kind've, at least - mocked a human face, you mean.

"So anyways, good ol chap! My good pal! You did so good on doing whatever you did, so how-za bout some thin-crust pizza??" You stood apruptly, newfound vigor and absolute confidence pumped through your veins.

You were absolutely astonished to see the boogeyman nod once - it was so slight you barely noticed.

"Aha! Well then! Follow me, good sir!"

The man dressed in the blue, grimy uh.. bodysuit? followed you down the hallway, and into the kitchen. Two pizza boxes were on the island in the middle of the kitchen.

"I got onions and mushrooms and stuff on one pizza, then i got one regular pepperoni. We shall feast!"

You had a small plate on the floor next to the island that had a small round thin slam of salami. Your friendly feline whom you've named Vore meowed and jogged towards the man behind you.

You watch as Vore rubbed themselves onto the boogeyman's legs. "Anyways. We shall feast!"

"Hey so," You swallow what you had in your mouth, almost choking on a large piece you thought you chewed, the boogeyman turned his head towards you, mask up slightly to reveal his lips so he could eat. You take another bite, chew quickly and swallow - "Why were you in my house? Were you going to murder me?"

The boogeyman didn't respond, but instead, took another bite of the thin crust pizza.

"I'd kill me too." You nodded with a chuckle, before taking, once again, another bite.

The boogeyman shook his head, opening his mouth to possibly respond - but he shut his mouth.

"Naah it's chill. I got a paper and pen on the counter besides you." You were eager to know what he was going to say.

Soon, the boogeyman was writing down some words.

He hands you the piece of paper, you rub your hands off on your pants before taking hold of the paper.

'i am michael no i did not come in to kill you i needed to hide'

"Ohh! Chill. That's cool." You hand him the paper back. He leaned over the counter - and began writing.

' i will be leaving.'

The paper said.

"Ah, damn. Really? Well, thanks for not killing me, you're a real one. Also! Good job on murdering! I don't care what you do - also uhhhh visit me? We're kinda friends now."

Michael placed the pen down and nodded - you gape, "Wait really? Cool! You know, I'm making some cookies tomorrow just for the fuck of it, you wanna come by, grab some and do what you need'a do?"

He nodded.

You salute him as he left through the hole in your fence. You sigh - closing the back door.

"What the fuck. I can't belive I'm actually friends with the boogeyman of Haddonfield now. This is so dope. Anyways. yummy fucking ice. yum yum yum crunch crunch."

You glance down at your cat, you was staring at you weird.

"I know. I'm a weird one 😔✌."

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

yeah same, i follow some fic accs that occaisionally post smut and its like mmmmm is the fluff writing enough to balance the posts that gives me finger burn trying to scroll past it? but yeah thats probably the way to go

ah i wasnt there for the teaser but i can imagine that was tantalising. lmaoo yes but to be fair i do have a writing acc called channiesbigheart so... balancing it out? but i absolutely am whipped beyond belief. it was a TRAVESTY how COULD they have. yeah the b sides gave him more lines but they werent the ones that were performed over and over at stages. yessss the line distribution in this album is impeccable, im pretty sure the thunderous stuff was some of their best distribution

hehe i can understand that, sometimes putting someone in a situation so horrible it would be considered a violation of human rights is theraputic, ya know? mmmm the differences are a bit nuts, it was 14 degrees today and in less than a week its going to be 32 or smth. BROOO that would be legendary, i bet theyd treat their artists rlly well and have great music as well ahhh but its a lot of work adn commitment. yES that is a mood if ever i heard one.

its the same in australia as well, sadly, you have people who hold up harry styles and lil nas x for breaking gender roles and wearing make up adn steryotypical womens clothing (and keep in mind i have infinite respect for both of them theyre honestly doing so much for the de-dehumanising of gay people and those who wear whatever they want), and calling the kpop boys gay and other things for doing the same thing, when theyve been doing it for years and gotten no recognition smh its so tragic. yes, anyway YES ONLY 6 MONTHS I AM FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES A BBY STAN altho i considered myself a fully fledged stay like 2 days after i got into them cos i just spent all day researching and fixating. YES someone said it. it feels like theyre losing a huge chunk of why a lot of people liked their music in teh first place, which was that whole dna, dope, fire mood. and even doing bright songs is fine, liek they should do what they want but i feel liek the western music industry is so fucking toxic that they feel pressured into making these decisions. dont get me wrong, theyre good decisions from a business perspective, theyre getting record breaking sales but still. mmm yeah honestly yg just needs to get its shit together or get out

oooh! not into nct but i see a lot of him, he seems rlly talented. ahh yes another channie ult lmaoo i feel that, my list is growing in leaps and bounds as well. mmm yeah i think i will, im just going to try to save enough money :) mingi appealed to me mostly for the voice (like felix smh what is it with me and deep voiced bois) but also his soft visuals and the whole cutesy thing he has going on i rlly liked. yes i did get into them while he was on hiatus, but im still mostly a casual stan, ill listen to the album when it comes out but i dont think ill obsessively look over everything to do with it, like skz. HAH WE'RE MORE SIMILAR THAN I THOUGHT. lmaooo the thot line describes them perfectly, why are they all so damn attractive. especially seonghwa, like that man looks like a character from a book, cardan greenbriar vibes anyone? mmhmm! his vocals are absolutely insane. ty! yeah im excited altho idk how theyre every going to beat border:carnival, that shit was impeccable. ahh no stress, enjoy teh groups you stan atm!

ahh thank you so much, ill keep that in mind. hehe thats good! hopefully its soon :( ah ty, it means a lot. ill think abt that and hopefully talk abt it a little more :)

ah, no it was inside our gymnasium but to get to the other side of the stage you had to exit the building, go around the back and then enter through the other stage door. ah tysm! im glad too. mmm same, they baffle me. ;n; noo so sad :( ahh, thats um not smth i put on here, but im in high school so make of that what you will :)

thank you! ive done a majority of them, i just have maths, an english presentation and an economic assignment due now so im pretty much home free. yeah i feel like hes the epitome of here for you while being inescapably far away. haha she sounds like one of my friends. lmaooo why is that me. hmmm i feel like youve answered a lot of them in that answer so maybe just ateez, enha, txt and bp? if you stan them? :)

ahhh no problem at all, proud of you for managing to overcome the procrastination! progress! mmm thats good! ahh pls do let me know if you ever decide that, i cant promise i wont cry but do what you gotta do :)

<3 w.a. 🐺

hi! sorry for the late reply, i didn't know how to construct sentences yesterday e.e

yeah sometimes it's the perfect balance! i personally don't like fics that focus mainly on the filth? the plot has to carry the whole fic somehow and the smut is just something to add to the mix. also, i'll follow you on your writing blog! i keep forgetting to do so, damn it.

"sometimes putting someone in a situation so horrible it would be considered a violation of human rights is theraputic, ya know?" putting it this way just silenced me but yes. angst just feels more realistic. it isn't always happy endings irl so i tend to do it a lot.

falling into skz is so easy! it felt like that for me too. stanning them felt like getting sucked into a blackhole. also yes i agree. kpop is nothing but an industry after all and it runs on money so i get why they do what they do as well.

i suggest we not talk about haechan because i will literally not shut up but yes my boy is an ace :( chan is also sooooo easy to love. and the chan's rooms just solidified his place as ult. having something to look forward to every week at a time when my mental health was just plummeting into the depths of tartarus just helped me be stable. oh yeah, mingi's deep voice is indeed sexc. and he has some wack ass duality as well! and i think seonghwa was one of the people i nearly considered as bias just because of his visuals because wow that's one beautiful face. and true, idk how enha's going to beat border:carnival. i don't like all the tracks simply bc of taste preferenceds but i like more than one so i consider that a lot already.

bro that gym should've had some sort of a covered walk :// also i miss being in high school sO DAMN MUCH. but i still feel like i am because time stopped when quarantine started and i was still in senior year at the time.

my ateez bias is wooyoung! it wasn't that much of a shocker to my kpop stan irls because i was a jimin stan for the longest time. enhypen is jake and they kept pointing out that he looked like seungmin sometimes so it's like chan's aussie-ness with a tinge of seungmin (the other guy in my skz bias line, in case i haven't mentioned it). txt is huening kai! i find it hard to believe that he's my age because he looks a lot younger? o.O and he always looks good damn :(( sigh for blackpink it's lisa! i tend to bias the maknaes of yg groups, it's a pattern i've noticed but don't intentionally do!

DON'T WASTE YOUR TEARS OMFG. you can always reach me elsewhere if i like disappear off this blog.

[lordseochangbin]

scene stealers

3racha imagine + smut— this is so filthy im so sorry i don’t know what this msksks

the dim, neon lights of the large studio and the consistent beat that allured your attention kept you distant from the few people around you. headphones covered your ears as your fingers brushed the dust off of the mix board in front of you and when the song came to an end, you quickly took them off.

“it’s perfect!” you said to the three boys sitting in the small black sofa behind you.

“dope!! now lets get this shit on the new album” chan winked before getting up to get the door.

“look who’s here” changbin smirked as jennifer walked in, her long legs practically glowing in her tight green shorts despite the dim lighting. you let out an annoyed sigh before waving at her and pretending to go back to work. 

how many times has jennifer been joining the four of you in the studio now? 15.. no no.. 20 times now? you didn’t know what it was about her. when she was around you seemed somehow.. lacking. the presence of three handsome men around you made you feel loved but when their eyes were on someone else you felt at loss. their eyes were definitely on jennifer, in fact if you didn’t have such a harsh deadline to meet you probably would’ve drooled over her in gay as well. just like the three men behind you, their focus entirely on her figure as she sat on chan’s lap.

enough about jennifer, what about this harsh deadline in front of you? you were no where close to finished, in fact jennifer’s arrival made it all the worse. for no reason you just felt the need to slap that dumbass bitch in the face. but you had no reason to. 

well, no justifiable reason. 

your feelings for jisung were the only things in sight, like it contaminated your occipital and the only thing that functioned was your beating heart and the jealously practically raging inside. if jennifer dared to look at jisung for one second, you would slit your throat- no. no... too dramatic. if she even touched if swear to motherfucking-

“y/n.. why are your shoulder’s so tense babe” changbin whispered in your ear, his hands wrapped around your neck as he slowly pressed on your pleasure points. changbin knew your body like a map, your midnight conversations about your kinks and expectations practically drawing the road for him. but he never took advantage of this.

you stretched your back when changbin’s hands drifted to your waist, his eyes glued to the screen realizing you hadn’t gotten any work done. “i’m just... not feeling it today changbin” you sighed, taking a sip of water before chan could seat himself on the chair next to you.

oh no, not this again. chan and changbin, they were like your two little horndogs. always wanting to get their hands on you, and you only encouraged it. letting them get a taste before leaving them to fend for themselves.

chan slyly placed a hand on your thigh, massaging it through the denim as he stared at the screen as well. “your not doing so well, huh princess?”

yes, these words did get you dripping wet. yes, you did want to take these two boys to the private rooms upstairs and...and maybe do things you shouldn’t do with your two best friends. wait, two?!

you turned your spinney chair around, ignoring the two men beside you before seeing the sight before you. jisung and jennifer literally making out on the couch, fucking disgusting. 

you got up in your seat, causing jisung to look up and chan to jump. “i’m leaving, i’ll finish it tomorrow” you said, grabbing your bag and exiting the room. the slightest of tears blurring your vision before you could whip them off and call it a night. 

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

after a long night of tossing and turning, you decided to start the morning fresh and brand new. you, and i mean you, were going to confess your feelings to han jisung. there was a little hope for mutual feelings but mutual or not you decided this was the only way to move past him. just rip it off like a bandage, and then you can give chan and changbin a real chance. 

you wore a black crop top with a plaid skirt and jisung’s favorite combat boots and headed out for the door. by the end of the day, you would be smiling in satisfaction whether you liked it or not.

small skips made your trip down the hallway to your studio cheerful before jisung could step in your tracks, making you stop abruptly in front of him

“hey, y/n! are you good? i saw the way you looked last night before you left”

“yeah, i’m doing alright.. thanks jisung!” you exclaimed before continuing your way to the studio. wait shit, maybe you should tell him now?? later??

you turned on your heels to see jisung facing you as well. “wait!” you both said in unison. laughing at the coincidence you two quickly met again

“you go first” jisung said eagerly before you could stop him, “no..no you go first!!” you replied with a smile on your face. you were sure what you had to say was going to end the conversation. 

“i...ummm” jisung started. 

“mhmm” you hummed, waiting for him to get over what he had to say as butterflies flipped your stomach

“i... i think i’m falling for jennifer. i’m gonna confess to her tonight”

you almost choked on your breath before you could pull a quick cover, “i’m sorry.. what?”

“i really like her y/n, only you and me know about this”

“well.. good for you jisung!” you said, giving him a pat on the back before looking back at your studio door. “well i have to get working now, good luck with jennifer” you winked before running back. 

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

seven hours later, you found yourself writing a track about how you should “never follow your heart” and “it leads to heartbreak, dont trust yourself folks”. completely different from stray kids message. as one of their producers you knew this was a failed production, pulling down your pair of headphones and throwing them to the ground

what was up with you? you told yourself by the end of the day you were going to feel brand new. at the moment you felt raged over past lovers. it was devastating, to see jisung find a girl like that but it was the only truth.

finishing off the song on a terrible note you grabbed your bag, slinging it over your shoulder as you walked past the hall in the full moon’s midnight.

the building was dead silent, only for the slightest of sounds to be heard. your instinct asked you to follow it, the sounds leading to the spare room. you stood by the doorway, taking a peek inside to see jisung and jennifer.

“shit” you cursed, quickly turning away and blinking quickly a few times. this wasn’t real right?? they weren’t seriously fucking in your company building right?

you took another peek inside to find yourself taken back. jisung found on the edge of the table, his hips thrusting into jennifer’s at rapid pace and it only got you thinking, ‘what if that were me?’

shit, bad move y/n. it was one thing to imagine it, but after you said it to yourself it became real. what if that were you? you felt the all too familiar wetness build up near your core as the need to fulfill it came by.

screw it, if they thought they could make out in the company building, what’s wrong with pleasuring yourself? your felt your hand unconsciously pull your jeans down, your fingers brushing over your folds as you teased yourself before dipping them in. you knew it wasn’t jisung but the thought of him kept you doing as your fingers came in and out.

adding a third finger in, you felt yourself come your orgasm, the juices falling over your fingers. taking a second to regain your posture you grabbed a few tissues from your bag to clean up.

after you pulled up your jeans you took a second to look back before walking away, leaving all your feelings at the door.

“y/n!” you heard a voice call from behind you.

you were hoping to not be disturbed as you tried to runaway, but you quickly found yourself running into chan’s arms.

“y/n...” chan whispered, his arms inviting you in for a hug. “what’s wrong?” he asked, his fingers running through your hair.

“nothing’s wrong chan” you replied with a shaky voice.

chan grabbed your cheeks in his hand, giving it a little squeeze before responding.

“don’t lie y/n, im not a stranger you know”

you chuckled at how well he knew you before giving him a tight hug.

“ill explain later, now can we grab some food or something? im starving”

“of course, my treat” chan said before dragging you to the elevators nearby

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

the next day you had to work with jisung to finish the song you had been procrastinating on ironically because of him. a few hours were dedicated to purely finishing the track before you two could plop down on the couch, sharing a burger and fries like you two always did.

“hold on.. wait jisung you have a little something” you said, grabbing a napkin to wipe the ketchup off his face

jisung watched as your leaned closer, slowing leaning himself back

“jisung, quit it!!” you giggled as jisungs expressioned turned into a smile.

you reached out to wipe the sauce off because you could lose your balance, falling on jisungs chest.

jisung panted in relief, his chest rising and falling below your cheek. “y/n...” he whispered, his hands finding themselves wrapped around your waist.

he missed times like this, and so did you. the sudden comfort you two brought each together was indescribable and that’s why you two worked so well with music. you were each other’s muse, each other’s inspiration.

you got up from his chest, smiling as his smirk turned into a frown. your cheeks flustered red as he placed a kiss on your forehead.

“i missed you, you seemed off these past few days but i want you to know im here- okay?”

“okay...” you whispered in a soft voice, “im gonna go to the bathroom” you continued, trying to break the awkward vibe in the room.

“no problem” jisung said, grabbing the bag of french fries as he watched you leave the room.

you walked out the door, your heart beating out of your chest. not being able to handle it, you had to get yourself out of there. seconds could’ve slipped by and you would’ve kissed him. you really wanted to kiss him.

checking the clock, you realized time passed by much quicker with jisung and it was already late in the night. the quiet halls of the building gave it away, except this time you knew you weren’t alone with jisung.

funny thing was, you heard those voices one again. was this like... some sort of ghost trying to remind you of what happened last night? the sounds felt all too real, all too heated as you followed them to the same room from last night...

and you saw what you never thought you’d have to witness.

it was jennifer and chan.

your jaw dropped at the night, chan biting his lip and jennifer’s naked figure ahead of him. but this time you didn’t feel the same.

cut chan some slack, you remembered jisung mentioning you were the only two who knew about the relationship. but jennifer, god you knew there was just something about her. you should’ve followed your first impressions.

you made your way to the door, taking a second to catch your breath before contemplating about what you were about to do. should you tell him what you just saw?

without a response, you unconsciously opened the door. jisung was playing on his phone before you could interrupt him.

“jisung! jisung look im..” you said in a ‘hate to break it to you’ tone

“what’s up?” jisung said, putting his phone away to listen to you

“look... i was walking past the hallway and in one of the rooms i saw chan.. and jennifer”

“chan and jennifer?” he said, unsure of what you were trying to point out

“and jennifer was naked” you put emphasis on the last word to see if it’ll help jisung connect the dots but nothing seemed to happen

“y/n...” he chuckled, “look i know what you’re thinking. jennifer is some soft or slut or whorebag and she’s stealing all my attention for you but that’s why im here today!! you didnt have to make up a lie or something” he explained, getting up from his seat

“no..no wait! im serious!!” you responded anxiously, stopping jisung from leaving before he could grab your wrists and give it a small squeeze

“y/n, stop being such a spoiled brat. i know we’re best friends but i can’t always be there.”

“spoiled brat?” you repeated jisungs words. as shocked as you were to see him call you that, you were even more surprised that he had chosen to believe his girlfriend over the girl friend he had for 14 year.

“fuck you, jisung. leave. just go” you said, pointing at the door before watching him shrug his shoulders and leave.

sobbing into the napkins from your mcdonalds order,youre trying to be as quiet as possible now that you’re aware of how the walls fail to be soundproof.

your thinking about apologizing, just going back into jisungs arms when you feel the comfort of two buff arms above you.

“y/n, you good?!” changbin asks in a worried tone, bring your head to his chest.

“i really need someone to hug right now” you said, your voice shaky as you broke into tears again.

“im all arms” changbin said. you grabbed his biceps, pulling him into a hug before finding comfort in his warm upper body

“literally” you giggled, giving his arms a little squeeze

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

the next day, you found yourself stuck with jisung again. he seemed quite sympathetic however, not apologizing for last night but still treating you with a kinder tone.

chan and jisung seemed closer, and it gave you chills. your mind wondered around, what if chan knew jennifer was jisung’s girlfriend?

you shook your head, no.. no that can’t be.

diverting your attention to the boys, you walked out on them again. they watched you leave the room in silence before you could, once again, hear that all too familiar sound.

taking a few steps towards the room, you placed your ear next to the door.

soon your senses forced you to look inside, seeing jennifer seating herself on changbin’s leg.

jisung... god jennifer needs to just fuck off. before you knew it jisung was staggering out of your studio, running towards the door you were listening into.

“jisung...”

“y/n.. what are you looking at?” jisung said, taking a peek inside before gasping

“you were right, she was cheating on us” chan said, not hesistating to take a step forward and open the door.

in a split second, jennifer turned her head, startled for your arrival. “guys!” she exclaimed, before changbin could softly push her off her leg.

“guys... what do you mean guys? fuck off jennifer” jisung said, making you smile at the words you had wanted to say to her so badly

“look changbin...jisung.. chan i can explain” she started before being interrupted by chan

“there’s no explaining, just leave before we embarrass you even more”

chan’s words made jennifer’s cheeks red before she could run out of the room.

you gasped at the way she left, looking towards the boys who were now standing side by side in front of you.

“wait, you guys knew?!” you asked, looking at jisung

“yes y/n.. im so sorry i didn’t listen to you”

you shook your head in disbelief, “well how did you find out?”

this question left changbin and chan laughing before chan could grab jisung’s steady shoulder

“y-you won’t believe it y/n, she said jisung’s name while making out with me! you think this beauty could even compare to that?!” chan asked sarcastically

“ i hope you’ll forgive me.. i didn’t mean to get mad at you. i only found out last night” jisung said, his hands tight in his pockets as he waiting for you to reply

you looked down at the ground trying to put the pieces together before responding “it’s alright jisung, i won’t let some girl get in between the three of us”you smiled.

looking at the three boys in silence was something of a rare occasion. your legs squeeze together as you remember how well they worked around jennifer... just thinking.. hoping

“fuck, y/n” changbin said, biting him lip. “if you could be any more obvious”

jisung snickered at changbin’s comment, “who is y/n looking at with her pussy so wet like that? i really can’t tell”

you inhaled sharply at chan’s words.

“now tell us y/n... who do you like out of the three of us?” chan asked, his arms crossed as he looked down on you

“uh…i don’t know. i used to like jisung but now i like all three of you?” you replied with a stutter.

in the three years of being with 3racha you never knew it’d end up like this. the sexual tension in the room made your heart beat fast and their presense intimidated you like no other.

“pfft, you hear that hyung? she likes all three of us” jisung said with a smirk, taking you by surprise that your own friend could call you out.

this excitement only reached its peak when changbin stepped forward, placing a finger beneath your chin so your eyes can meet his

“that’s right… y/n is our little slut” he smirked. you let out a whine at his tone before chan’s arms could wrap around your waist from behind, “and what should we do with our little slut?” he asked, making your body fall into his touch like putty

jisung let out a chuckle before he could join the three of you, his hand slithering underneath your dress.

“hyungs, we fuck her senseless until she can decide who she likes

chan was quick to grab your hips, grinding your ass over his hard member as jisung slowly tugged down your pretty skirt

“babygirl, who are you so wet for?” changbin whispered in your ear before his hands could rip open your shirt, quickly reaching for your bra.

with chan’s assistance your bra was taken off, jisung’s fingers giving you no mercy and thrusting his fingers in and out of your core.

the three boys set you on fire, your back arching for more of each boy. changbin’s lips met your erected nipple and he sucked on it harshly. chan’s pants coming off as you continued to grind on his member. jisungs fingers working wonders on your clit.

it felt like an endless cycle of pleasures, receiving and giving with no stops. you were so close to your high, your ass moving on chan so jisung’s fingers could meet your sweet spot.

hands were all over your body, each exposed piece of skin warm as the boys spoiled you with love.

“fuck.. fuck y/n are you close?” jisung said, groaning at the sight of you tightening around his fingers.

“g-god yes!” you squealed as you cummed all over jisung’s fingers.

chan smirked, making eye contact with changbin as they held onto your shaking legs.

“you think you can help us out now babygirl?” chan asked, placing a few kisses on your neck to help you calm down from your high.

you nodded submissively before you could lie down on the ground. not knowing how this was going to work, you lied on your back hoping the three would figure it out and oh boy did they figure it out.

changbin held his member to near your lips. “open up, princess” he commanded, you politely obeying and letting his slip his cock into your mouth.

he started off with slow movements, your tongue playing around as he stroked your cheeks. “you’re doing so well” he praised, smiling as tears came across your eyes while he sped up.

the pain soon turned into pleasure, your hips squirming before chan could hold them tight.

“you ready babygirl?” chan asked, placing a few kisses on your abdomen. you nodded, bobbing your head up and down on changbin’s member as you did so causing him to moan.

at the sudden movement, chan entered his member into your dripping core. one hand held onto your hip, nailing digging into your skin whil the other grabbed changbin’s shoulder to pace himself.

both boys groaned as their high was approaching, jisung pumping himself as he watched the masterpiece before himself. it seemed almost like a porn clip, something people would throw their money at if broadcasted.

three beautiful boys and you, the two of them reaching their high. chan’s thrusts slowed down as his nails digged deeper into your skin.

“im close y/n” chan said before he could cum inside you.

a line full of curses followed as your tongue swirled around changbin’s cock, causing him to cum inside your mouth as well.

to make sure you were okay, changbin got off you and watched as your heavy panting could take over. you licked your lips dry before collapsing onto the ground, “fuck, that was so hot” you chuckled to yourself.

“that was..” chan agree before the three boys could sit side by side next to you.

jisung came closer to your lips, pressing a small kiss before pushing away the stranded pieces of hair that stuck to your forehead with sweat

“you did amazing love” jisung whispered with a smile

changbin joined in as well, his hand rubbing your inner thigh as he kissed a few spots near your core making you whine from the pain

“don’t worry baby, you did so well”

you smiled as the three boys looked at you with such satisfaction before chan could grab your hand

“but i guess the original question was... who do you like out of the three of us?”

you took a deep breath as they looked at you with anticipation, waiting for an answer. you took a second to look at chan, jisung, and changbin before licking your lips.

“i like....”

a/n: you choose reader ! :D

[lenniewip]

Unknown (A Sterek Wrong Number/Celebrity AU)

11.09 PM Unknown Number

>I’m writing songs about you again.

11.20 PM Unknown Number

>its stiles btw.

>in case you deleted my number

>I did.

>I mean I deleted yours.

>but I still remember it apparently

11:41 PM Unknown Number

>I only have 2 lines so far

11:57 PM Unknown Number

>I bleed you from my veins.

>I grieve you like I love you.

>alone.

>its better with the chords.

>u were always better at writing lyrics than me

12:34 AM Unknown Number

>u were better everything than me

2:00 AM Unknown Number

>I hate that I miss you

2:07 AM Unknown Number

>do u want to hook up?

>I promise not to propose again

2:15 AM Unknown Number

>im sorry.

>ignore me.

>im drinking

Derek blinked bleary eyes. His phone screen was the only source of light in his room, as he read through the flurry text messages.

What the hell is a Stiles?

2:17 AM Unknown Number

<I think you have the wrong number

>Lydia?

<no

>oh thank fuck

>I mean

>I’m sorry

>for disturbing ur sleep

>but im just glad I didn’t drunk text my ex all of this

>bullet dodged right?

>is this what near death experiences feel like?

<I wouldn’t know.

>of course

>hey

>seeming as I have you here can I ask you a quick q?

>all my friends are asleep

<probably because its 3am

<everyone’s asleep

>2.39

>and ur not

>asleep that is

>so?

>I’ll take your silence as a go ahead

>what do you think?

>of the lyrics

<im the wrong person to ask

>never experienced heartbreak?

<no

<all song lyrics just look like bad poetry to me

>oh

>yeah I guess it does

>not everyone can be Rupi Kaur tho right?

<do you want to be rupi kaur?

>sure

>not to be dramatic or anything

>but

>I want to be anyone but me

>think id rather be someone like regina spektor tho

<regina spektor?

>singer/song writer

>shes my fucking inspiration

>her lyrics are like poetry to me

>you should listen to her music

<I dont really listen to music

>what the fuck?

>are you an alien?

<no?

>nice fucking try ET

>thats exactly what an alien would say

<…you got me there

>akdjfen

>is this you admitting I was right?

<no

<but this is me going to bed

<because its now 4AM

>already?

>fuck

>ive got an early start tomorrow

>good night random stranger

>and thanks

>for listening

>or reading ig

<good night

//

“You’re late.” Laura frowned, arms crossed.

“Are you going to let me in?” Derek grumbled, still feeling the affects of having stayed up until 4AM the previous night.

Laura didn’t argue she just stepped aside to let him through into her flat. “You’re grumpier than usual.” She noted.

“Didn’t sleep well.”

Derek hated the look she gave him then.

The look that said he was broken. The look that said she wanted to fix him.

“Is…Is it the nightmares again?” Laura’s voice dipped to a whisper, like the question alone would be enough to send him over the edge.

“No.”

An awkward silence defended over the two of them, neither knowing what to say.

Derek clung to the silence like a blanket, wishing things could go back to how they used to be. Back to when they knew how to speak to one another.

But this was enough.

It was enough to know that they were both trying. Failing. But trying.

//

2:40 PM Laura

>I’m here if you need to talk.

//

Derek isn’t good at art, but sometimes it’s the only way he can express himself. Words had never been his forte.

So instead he doodles.

Shitty toddler level doodles that he never shows anyone.

Sometimes he thinks if he could bring himself to show Laura she would like it. Maybe she would even understand it.

But there was a bigger chance that she wouldn’t, and he would feel even more like a stranger to his own sister than he already was.

//

10:18 PM Unknown Number

>I don’t remember it anymore

<You have the wrong number again

>No

>This is ‘not Lydia’ right?

<right

>So here’s the thing.

>I always thought if I needed to text her I could

>And I thought maybe I got her number wrong because I was drunk

>But I can’t remember it anymore

<Oh.

>I have some of her things still

>I don’t think I’ll ever get to return it now

>Unless she messages me first

<When did you two break up?

>Last year

>and I know what you’re thinking

>’it’s October’

>and I should be over her by now

>Trust me I know

>So you don’t need to lecture me

<I wasn’t going to

>Oh

<Stiles?

>That’s weird

<what is?

>I forgot I told you my name

<You should throw away the stuff she left behind.

>you’re right

>I don’t like it.

>but you’re right

>…thanks

<What for?

>for listening

>reading**

>my friends are pretty sick of hearing me complain

>so this is nice

<sure

<anytime

>dope

>no take backsies

<am I going to regret this?

>for definite

>you’re stuck with me now

//

That night Derek saves Stiles’ number as ‘Bad Poet’.

//

Stiles keeps messaging after that.

Stiles messages like they’ve been friends for years, and Derek very determinedly does not analyse why it is he always responds.

Even when there are messages dated from Laura from three days ago that he hasn’t even been able to bring himself to open yet.

He also ignores how when he’s messaging Stiles the gaping pit that had made residence in his chest feels just a little less inescapable.

//

Derek can’t bring himself to tell Stiles his name. He can’t bring himself open up, even though there’s a large part of him that wants to.

He’s not above admitting he’s scared.

//

Derek draws Stiles sometimes.

More accurately he draws a vague pair hands texting on a phone, because he has no idea what Stiles actually looks like.

Derek refuses to let himself dwell on that though, because they are happy drawings.

The pictures of Stiles are pretty much his only happy drawings right now.

//

They don’t always talk about Lydia.

Sometimes Stiles messages Derek song lyrics he’s working on.

Other times it’s memes, or just a bunch of emojis.

Once Stiles had just messaged him what Derek could only assume was a list of everything he had eaten that day.

Sometimes Stiles messages in rambles - and Derek can’t always keep up with the boy’s run away thoughts, but even then he never feels lost the way he does when he’s trying to interact with literally anyone else.

And sometimes it’s 2AM. Those are simultaneously Derek’s favourite and least favourite texts.

//

2:02 AM Bad Poet

>sometimes I feel like too much

>and too little

>at the same time

>u ever feel like that ET?

<not really

>its like I’m infinite, and meaningless

>like a never ending echo

>or a recurring decimal

>I just stretch on and on forever but theres no point to it

>I have no depth

<youre not meaningless

<you’re a rhythm.

<like breathing

>…

>was that a regina spektor reference?

<it might have been

>I thought you didn’t listen to music?

<well someone said her lyrics were like poetry

<so I thought I would check out a few songs

>well fuck

>what did you think?

<she’s good

>you spelt ‘amazing’ wrong

<I still prefer poetry

>of course you do

Derek stared at the texts an ache filling his chest.

Derek was the opposite of infinite. Everything he touched turned to flames.

//

10:30AM Bad Poet

<my sister bought me flower seeds

>I didn’t know you had a sister?

<she’s everything I have

>oh

<and I think she’s trying to trick me into therapy somehow

>…with flower seeds?

<yes

>you sound extremely paranoid

>maybe therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you?

<shut up

>noted.

>keep me posted on how your gardening goes

>also

>as a side note

>you know you have me too right?

>if you ever need to talk or anything, I’m right here for you

<thanks

>anytime

//

On Derek’s birthday Laura insists the two of them spend the day together, and Derek knows better than to argue.

She buys him a cake and they spend hours sat next to one another silently. Two strangers desperately trying to keep hold of one another but with an ocean dividing them.

Once their family had been so alive.

And it was all Derek’s fault that was gone.

They both knew it.

Sometimes Derek wondered if Laura hated him as much as he did.

He was too scared to ask.

//

That night Derek chased the ache in his chest away with a drink.

And then several more followed.

//

1:14 AM Bad Poet

<seh haars me

>sorry bud, you’re going to have to try again

>try spell checking before hitting send

<she.hates mee

>who?

<larn

>are you drunk?

<yeh

<tyongs ndrf

*Out Going Call: Bad Poet*

The phone rings twice before being picked up. “Sorry. Stupid keyboard is so small. Impossible to type.” Derek mumbled, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being pressed into the sofa cushion.

“Wow. You’re really sloshed huh?”

“No.” Derek denied. “Just tipsy.”

“Right. So what was it you were trying to tell me? Someone hates you?”

“Laura.”

“Who’s Laura?”

“My sister.”

“Oh.”

“She looks at me like she wishes she could fix me.”

“That doesn’t sound like she hates you, bud.”

“She should. I can’t be fixed.”

“You’re right, because you’re not broken.”

Hearing Stiles say that Derek could almost believe it to be true.

“I mean it. You’re not broken. You’re just a different shape than you used to be. But the shape you are now is beautiful.”

Derek closes his eyes and lets the words wash over him. “Do you sing?” He finds himself asking.

“What?”

“I know you write songs, but do you ever sing?”

“Oh…” Stiles sounds uncomfortable. “I guess… Yeah. I do.”

Derek hummed in the back of his throat. “I bet you have a nice voice.”

“Th-thanks.”

Derek tried to say something else, but all that comes out is a yawn, which makes Stiles let out a jittery laugh.

Derek tries to memorise the sound of It, but it’s so fleeting, it’s already slipping away from him.

“I think you need to go sleep, ET.”

“Yeah.” Derek agrees.

“Goodnight bud.”

“Wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you stay on the phone? Just for a bit longer.” Derek clutched on to the phone like if he could grip tightly enough it would make Stiles stay.

I don’t want to be alone. The words die on Derek’s tongue.

“Sure.” Stiles didn’t hesitate. “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Sleep pulled at Derek’s consciousness, unravelling his grip on reality.

“Stiles?”

Stiles hummed in answer.

“Your shape is beautiful too.”

A small whimper came from the other end of the phone. “Thanks.”

//

7:50 AM Bad Poet

>how are you feeling today?

<better

>good <3

Derek holds his phone tightly and wishes that he had more to say. Just to keep the conversation going.

He also wishes (not for the first time) that Stiles was more than a faceless entity on the other end of the phone.

But it’s the first time he feels the want like a physical ache in his chest.

Derek had never been good with words, but if Stiles was here in front of him Derek would probably give him a hug.

But everything Derek touches eventually dies, and a larger part of him is relieved for the distance.

//

Derek plants the seeds his sister got him that day.

//

9:48 PM Bad Poet

>would it totally weird you out if I wanted to do another phone call?

>don’t feel like you need to say yes

>I just enjoyed talking to you

>and hearing your voice

>ugh.

>why are words so hard?

<I wouldn’t be opposed to a phone call

*Incoming Call: Bad Poet*

“Hey.” Derek feels breathless as he answers the phone, anxious excitement clawing it’s way up his throat.

“Hey.” Stiles sounds equally out of breath, and that helps.

Derek chews on his lip, scrambling for something to say. “What did you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know.” Stiles admitted. “Anything.”

“Helpful.” Derek said sarcastically.

“I mean. There’s one thing. I didn’t want to ask when you were drunk because it felt a little like taking advantage. And I don’t want you to think you have to answer-”

“Stiles.” Derek interrupts before Stiles could break into a full blown ramble.

“Tell me your name.” Stiles breaks. “Please.”

Anxiety grips his heart. But… he couldn’t stay scared forever.

“It’s Derek.”

“Derek.” Stiles repeats his name in a reverent whisper, as if committing it to memory.

And hearing Stiles say his name makes everything worth it.

//

Phone calls become a regular thing between the two of them over the next month. Always between late in the evening and the early hours of the day.

//

The next time Derek spirals he doesn’t drink before he calls Stiles, but he does cry on the phone.

The next morning he wakes up to a text from Stiles.

6:42 AM Bad Poet

>you need to talk to your sister

And Derek knows he’s right.

//

It’s not easy confronting Laura. He has two separate anxiety attacks on the walk to her apartment alone.

But he forces himself to take the dive.

“It’s okay if you hate me.” He tells her, even though it’s not okay. Laura’s hate might be the only thing in the world that could break him beyond repair.

Laura looks horrified as she stares at him. “I don’t- Obviously I don’t hate you Derek.”

“It’s my fault that they’re gone.” Derek addresses the elephant in the room.

If he hadn’t fallen in love with Kate.

If he hadn’t broken up with her, just to try and prove a point when she refused to say ‘I love you’ back…

There never would have been a fire.

Their family would still be here if it wasn’t for him.

“Fuck that!” Laura let out a harsh noise. “Derek, none of this was ever your fault. You were a kid, and even if you weren’t… You never set the fire.”

“I might as well have.”

“No. If anyone… I was your big sister- am your big sister. But I was so fucking wrapped up in myself. I didn’t even know about Kate.”

The last time Derek had seen Laura cry it had been at the funeral, so it took a second to fully sink in what he was seeing.

He found himself crying to.

“I’m so sorry, Der.”

Derek stumbled forwards pulling Laura into a crushing hug. Laura hugs him back just as tight.

They spend hours refusing to let go of one another.

//

He realises he fell asleep on Laura’s sofa when he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. But he had no idea where it was, and he was too tired to move.

He feels Laura moving and the sound of the phone ringing gets louder before cutting off abruptly.

“Hello?”

“No - Derek’s asleep.”

“Maybe call at a more reasonable time?”

“Who is this?”

“Your voice sounds familiar.”

“Right.”

“Okay. Bye.”

Derek let sleep over take him once more.

//

2:29 AM Bad Poet

>sorry for calling so late

>you’re asleep so I’ll just take to you tomorrow

//

9:07 AM Bad Poet

<sorry, I was really tried

>no worries man

>you’re allowed to have a life outside of me

<was something wrong?

>no I was just bored, and didn’t realise how late it had gotten

>im fine

>how are you?

<im good actually

<I spoke to Laura

>yeah?

>I’m proud of you

>how’d that go?

<we both cried

<a lot

<and I ended up falling asleep on her couch

>look at you, opening up and shit.

>think I might cry now

<shut up

>literally never

>better men have tried and failed to silence me

//

2:40 PM Laura

>Want to see a movie on Friday?

<sure

//

One night Stiles calls Derek just to say his name in stupid ways, and laugh himself stupid after each one.

“Duhreek.”

“Doreck.”

“Fuck. I’m getting a stitch from laughing.”

“You’re so fucking dumb.” Derek is smiling as he said it.

“Deeruk.” Stiles wheezes out.

Derek just closes hie eyes and listens.

“I’m so fucking glad I know you, Stiles.” The words fall out of Derek’s mouth without much thought.

He only realises the weight of his words when Stile’s laughter pulls to a stop.

“I uh-” Stiles stammered. “Me too. Fuck. You’re the best thing to happen to me in…so fucking long. I’m glad I know you too Derek.”

//

Derek finally admits to himself that night that he’d fallen at least a little in love with the stranger from the unknown number.

//

He keeps trying to draw Stiles, but he can’t. Vague shapes just don’t cut it anymore.

He wants to map Stiles out with his eyes and translate it onto the page.

He wants to be able to see the smile behind the laughter.

He wants.

//

1:58 AM Bad Poet

>do you think you day we’ll actually meet?

>maybe not intentionally

>maybe one day we’d pass each other in the streets and not even know

>maybe we already have

Derek couldn’t imagine a scenario where he wouldn’t notice Stiles.

<is there ever a moment when you’re not talking?

<I think id recognise your voice and know it was you

>maybe your face would make me speechless ;)

<I think id still know

<but if you want to be sure… I could send you a picture?

<of me

>dkfajd

>for reals?

>you would do that?

>you?

<well…not for free

>there’s always a catch

>what do you want?

>my soul?

>a blood debt?

>you can have whatever it is

<I meant you’d have to send me a picture too

<geez stiles

The next text takes an unnervingly long time to come through.

>I could do that

>a photo for a photo

>I kind of look like shit rn

>so no judging me

Derek spends the next two minutes fussing and fidgeting to take a good photo. No matter what angle he took it from the bags under his eyes were noticeable, and so was the week’s worth of stubble he had yet to shave off.

And maybe this was a terrible, awful, idea.

But Derek would send one hundred bad pictures if it meant getting to see one of Stiles.

He forced himself to press send on the last picture he took.

As he pressed send another photo came in.

Derek’s fingers shook as he hit the button to download the image.

His heart stopped.

Stiles was beautiful in every sense of the word, and Derek found himself unable to look away. Even when he heard the small dings of incoming messages.

But he couldn’t ignore them for long, because it was Stiles. And when ever Stiles messaged Derek had to answer.

>Fucking hell

>are you for real?

>you gave me a heart attack

>am I being catfished right now?

>when do you think you were going to tell me you’re the most fucking beautiful man to exist ever?

>how the hell to you look like that as 2AM!?

>Derek

>oh my god

>you gotta respond my dude because I’m freaking out a little bit

>still there?

>did my selfie scare you away?

>I would have tried harder for a nice photo if I knew I was talking to an adonis

>Derek?

<still here

>of thank fuck

>so…

<so?

>come on

>your going to give me a complex

>the selfie…was it okay?

>I know it’s not much

>but we can’t all be greek gods

<its beautiful

<you’re beautiful, stiles

>oh

>thanks

//

Derek is so far gone that he makes the picture of Stiles the home screen on his phone.

//

9:49 AM Bad Poet

<Laura wants me to meet her boyfriend

<this is all your fault

>how is this my fault?

<because she never wanted to introduce us before

<and then you got me to talk to my sister

<and now she wants me to meet him

>…and this is a bad thing?

<yes

>because?

<I don’t make good first impressions

<it’s going to be awkward

>yeah probably

<you’re not helpful

>I wasn’t trying to be ;)

>have fun, Derek!

//

Meeting Laura’s boyfriend wasn’t as awkward as Derek thought it was going to be. But it was strange.

Derek hadn’t been expecting to meet someone so soft and kind. He was nothing like any one that Laura had dated before.

But he also wasn’t used to seeing Laura smile as much as she did around him.

Maybe not all change was bad.

//

Derek tells Laura about Stiles by accident. Or more accurately he mentions Stiles once by accident (not even by name) and Laura had badgered him until he admitted that he had made a friend through a wrong number.

“There’s a lot of weirdos out there.”

“I know.”

God did Derek ever know.

But Stiles is different.

“Just…be careful.”

“I am being. I promise.”

Laura reluctantly lets it go after that. “So…what’s he like?”

“He’s…he’s like bad poetry.”

“Oh god. You’re in love with him aren’t you?”

Derek can’t bring himself to deny it, but he does tell Laura to shut up.

//

Derek fully embraces being in love with Stiles on the day he tells Stiles about his drawings. He’d never told anyone about them before - not even Laura. But telling Stiles had been easy.

‘It reminds me of line art’ Stiles had said when Derek had sent him a photo of the doodle he had been working on. “I love it’.

A warmth flutters through Derek’s veins.

//

It all goes sideways on the day Laura goes on Derek’s phone to check the time.

She’d raised one eyebrow at him looking amused.

“I thought you didn’t listen to music?” She said, a teasing note to her voice.

“I don’t.” Derek shrugged.

“A huh. So why do you have a picture of Stiles Stilinski as your wallpaper?” She asks.

It’s so startling to hear Stiles name coming out of Laura’s mouth that Derek’s brain refuses to function properly. “How do you know Stiles?” He asks weakly.

Laura laughs. “He’s not exactly a niche celebrity Der. He was a really famous YouTuber before he started selling albums.”

Derek doesn’t know what to say to that. He blinks as his world slowly unravels before him.

No.

She had to be wrong, because Derek couldn’t be in love with a celebrity. Stiles couldn’t be…

“Hey are you okay? You look really sick?”

“He’s famous?” His throat is dry.

“Yes? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’ve got to speak to me Der. Use your words.”

Derek just shakes his head because he can’t.

“It’s him.” He manages to get out.

“What are you talking about?”

“Laura. It’s him.”

It takes a moment to click but Derek knows when it does because a look of thunderous wrath takes over Laura’s face.

“I’ll kill him.” She seethes, shaking with anger. “What kind of fucking punk thinks that this is a good prank to play?”

“What?”

“No one is getting away with catfishing you, Der. I’m going to hunt this fucker down, and then I’ll rip him so many new ones that he going to look like SpongeBob when I’m done with him.”

And god, Derek hadn’t even considered the thought that Stiles might not even be Stiles. The thought of Stiles being a liar…

The gape in his heart grows a little bit bigger.

And it all falls apart.

//

It takes hours before Derek can convince himself to confront Stiles.

11:08 PM Bad Poet

<you’re stiles stilinki

>fuck

(And yeah, it was really him).

>how did you find out?

<Laura

>I was going to tell you

<Were you?

>Yes

>I’ve wanted to for ages

>It just never felt like the right time to bring it up

<I wish you had decided on the right time was sooner

>Me too

>I’m sorry

>Please don’t hate me

Derek did not think it was possible for him to hate any part of Stiles.

<I don’t

>Thank fuck

>seriously

>can I call you?

<sure

Derek closed his eyes after sending the text and waited for Stiles to ring. A heartbeat later his ringtone sounded off.

“Hey.”

“You believe me right?” And Stiles sounds more frantic than Derek had ever heard him before.

“I believe you, Stiles.”

“Are you sure, because I can prove it if you want? I can do a video call? Or I can tweet literally anythi-”

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”

Stiles lets out a small whine, that reaches through the phone line and yanks at Derek’s already tattered heart, unraveling him just a little more.

“Meet me.” Stiles said, taking Derek by surprise.

“What?”

“Please. I meant to throw a please in there, I’m just really fucking nervous right now. Meet me please. In real life. I uh- I was going to ask when I finally told you about the whole being a celebrity thing. It’s still weird to say that out loud. That’s part of why it was so hard to tell you. But the point was you beat me to the punch with the whole reveal thing, but I still wanted to ask.”

“Stiles…”

“And it’s not that I was trying to use my influence or fame to pressure you into meeting me. I just wanted to be in a space where we were one hundred per cent honest with one another before I asked you. You can still say no. Of course you can, I don’t know why I’m- my point is I hope you don’t say no.”

Derek feels his heart break in two.

“Stiles…I can’t.”

“Oh.”

He hadn’t fully realised just how many worlds apart the two of them were when he had fallen in love with Stiles. It felt even more impossible than it had before.

“I’m sorry.” The words leave him feeling hollow.

“No. Don’t apologise. This is just me getting carried away. It’s okay.”

I love you. The words never leave Derek. They can’t leave him.

There was no way this could work, and he was far too scared of breaking the tentative connection they had with his useless words.

It was better for him to just… fall out of love.

//

6:17AM Laura

<it’s really him

>are you sure

<I’m sure

>what are you going to do?

<nothing

>Derek you’re in love with him

<I’m aware

<it doesn’t matter

<it wouldn’t ever work

>I’m sorry

<don’t be

<I’m going to be fine

>Im coming over with wine

//

That night Derek fills pages and pages of his notebook with drawings of Stiles.

When he gets a message from Stiles at 11PM- for the first time since they started messaging- Derek leaves it unopened.

//

He never ignores a message again after that, and life moves on. Stiles still messages him all the time, but he never asks to call anymore.

Derek misses his voice so much that he goes onto youtube and listens to his music.

He buys all three albums Stiles released and it still doesn’t feel like enough.

//

He fills an entire notebook with doodles of Stiles.

It’s still not enough.

//

1:11 PM Bad Poet

>I wrote you a song

>I know you don’t listen to music

>but it felt weird to not a least send you a link

>bad poetry at 2:00am

The link leads Derek to a youtube video of Stiles holding a ukulele and staring with a soft smile at the camera.

“Hey guys. It’s been a while, huh? But I guess I finally found inspiration. So here we go.”

The song is beautiful, but even more beautiful than that was Stiles.

When the song reached the end Derek doesn’t hesitate to hit replay.

He listens to the song ten times before he realises he’s crying - and he knows that he’s never going to ‘get over’ Stiles because he doesn’t want to.

//

3:00 PM Laura

>have you seen the video?

<he sent me a link

<he wrote a song for me Laura

<I love him so fucking much and he wrote a song for me

>fuck

<what do I do?

>what do you want to do?

<I don’t know

>I think you should look at his twitter

<?

>I wasn’t going to say anything because you said you wanted to get over him

>but I think you need to see it

>@stilesstilinki

//

@stilesstilinski

I want to hug him

@stilesstilinski

Get you a guy that will stay up with you until 4AM talking about literally anything

@stilesstilinski

Why do I alway fall for people so far out of my league? rip me I guess.

@stilesstilinski

He makes me want to write poetry

Derek spends hours scrolling through Stiles’ twitter.

He scrolls far enough back that he gets to the part of his timeline where his twitter is littered with pictures of Lydia, which causes the ache in Derek’s chest to grow. But he can’t stop looking because Stiles looks so happy.

And Derek falls impossibly more in love.

He lets himself acknowledge for the first time that Stiles might love him back.

And everything else?

It’s worth it.

Because Stiles is worth everything to Derek.

//

2:00 AM Bad Poet

<so I looked at your twitter

>fuck.

>how much did you see?

<all of it

>tight

>please excuse me while I go die now

>bye

<don’t leave yet

<I had something I wanted to ask you

>did you want me to delete the tweets?

>I can do that

>I’ll just delete the whole account

>I am my own worst enemy so this won’t be a problem

>actually Jackson Whittemore is my worst enemy

>but I’m a close second

<stiles?

>yup?

<Will you go on a date with me?

>alkdjf

>yes?

>Ofc yes?

>are you being serious?

>because this would be a cruel prank if you’re not serious

<I’m serious

>yes.

>yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. yes.

>holy shit

>theres no fucking universe where I say ‘no’ to that question from you

>im so fucking in love with you

>is it too soon to say that?

>I don’t even care

>I’m speaking my truth

>you obviously don’t have to say it back

>im going to woo you so hard Derek

>you’ll have to love me back eventually

>I’m going to write you poetry

>hell I’ll even read poetry for you

>ill give the whole fucking moon to you

<why would I want the moon?

<im not gru?

>despicable me

>that was a despicable me reference.

>you don’t listen to music, but you watch despicable me?

>you’re such an enigma to me Derek

>god I love you so much

<stiles?

>too much?

<no

<I don’t think I could ever have too much of you

<I love you too stiles

<so much

<I just don’t want you to get your hopes up

<I might not be able to live up to it in real life

>impossible

<seriously stiles

>I am being serious

>I’m already in love with you Der

>you don’t have to do anything more than you’ve already done

>you could wear a potato sack, and spend the whole night not saying anything at all

>and I would still be in love with you

>all you have to do now is show up

<…I can do that

>perfect

//

TWO YEARS LATER

@stilesstilinski

Hey @JacksonWhittemore, remember when you told me I would die alone? Well I just got engaged to the love of my life. So checkmate fucker.

[dreamsafterhours]

college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: II (donghyuk’s pathway)

a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class

markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?

genre: fluff pairings: platonic!mark+dy/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college best friend warning: a lil swearing (best get used to it lol)

masterlist

or click here to continue your friendship with paediatrics!haechan!

I ⇤ | II | ⇥ III

II: relationship consolidation.. it’s platonic i swear

the fellowship continues (mark + dy/n)

so the month that follows your first meeting

is full of

a mixture of crackheadedness and tortured artist vibes

a lot of it is sending lit memes and other shit to each other at 2am when u have an 8am the next morning and yelling at each other for keeping u up so late but then laughing again at whatever the ridiculous punchline was

“to quote shakespeare’s hamlet, act v, scene ii, line 270: no”

/deep inhale/ /unhinged laughter/

that’s your inside joke for a whole two weeks mark couldn’t get the numbers right the first few times uwu poor confused thing but he got it after a while so good on him

in the second class after the first day, you try your best to find in him the crowd of people lining up to go into the lecture theatre but you can’t and it’s almost time to go in and—

oop you’re getting swept by the current of the masses

you still try to look for him even then

and luckily your attempts pay off !bc you do see him further up the stairs

,, but he’s

,.talking to another person, sitting in a seat on the end of the row 

slightly disappointed that you can’t sit together and get to know him better and hopefully become friends but !! still optimistic that you’ll just make new friends

you file into an empty seat near his row a little further down the stairs from where he was sitting

you take out your materials and start to go over your notes from the day before when

someone plops himself down on the seat next to you

you look up and before you can smile in greeting, you recognise

it’s mark!!

he says “heyyy” in that rlly soft voice idk if you’ve seen the vid of him going ʰᶦ but that’s the voice he uses here

and you’re like “oh hi! wait i thought i saw you sitting over there” pointing behind u

and he’s like “oh i just met a friend and i was saving his girlfriend’s seat haha.. she just arrived so they kicked me out and i saw u and !!yeah”

and u nod at him like “nice nice i thought you ditched me” jokingly ofc

“no no i was actually trying to find you but.. you’re too short”

“i’m what”

/whispers/ “i’m sorry omg don’t kill me pls”

/stands up straighter to assert dominance/ “say that again, marcus. say that again”

ajsagdfo cuties

“ok then should we meet somewhere before the lectures”

so you decide on the benches outside the building as Your Spot™

the lecture’s just an introduction to the first text in the syllabus bc . second class

and so there’s quite a bit of note taking,, naturally

mark forgets what the prof says before he can write it down and this particular prof, you learn, is prone to talking fast and then switching the lecture slides before anyone can write anything important down

poor mark is doing a lot of looking up at the slides and then down at his notebook and :(((

so r u but u seem to have better memory than him so u either have the lecture slides up if you’re a typer with your notes or manage to write your notes and still listen to the prof if you’re a writer idk yalls preferences so

meanwhile mark whispers under his breath,, half to himself

“what” don’t we all,, mark.. don’t we all

and he does that a few times so you look over and he’s written barely anything so at that point he’s almost just resorted to listening to the prof and not taking notes at all

then he seems to catch himself and he starts writing down whatever key terms the prof is spewing and you realise

kid’s blanking out lmfao

so you tell him you’ll send your notes over to him after class and he’s like !! R U SURE im so sorry im not used to this sPEED and i can’t put my hand up and ask him to slow down someone else has to do that

and u just nod and tell him it’s all g

so class ends and you wave goodbye (confirming to meet at the benches next week too) to go to your tutorial class that happens to be right after the lecture and so does he,,

and this is your thought process for the next five or so minutes:

there’s only one exit so surely he’s only going outside and not the same way as me

oh look he’s going the same way as me.. i’m sure he’s just going to another building ooh that’s a pretty cool tree

hey we can walk to our next classes together and then split up where we have to go in different directions

is he turning left or right left or right i’m going left left or right left or—wait oh cool

ah there’s a bunch of classes in this building too surely he’s on a different floor. see he’s going up the stairs—wait he’s going up the stairs.. so am i..,,,

nah surely he’s going up another floor

wait if he’s going up another floor.. why isn’t he going on the elevator

does he have a fear of enclosed spaces

does he have childhood trauma in an elevator

maybe he keeps fit by climbing stairs

lol this is my floor, be funny if..

hang on a second

HANG ON A SECOND

“HANG ON A SECOND” that wasn’t one of your thoughts btw that was. out loud

very loud

and he turns around, startled at your voice again

looking up from his phone and eyes getting wider than they were in their initial reaction

“wHAT THE—WAIT HOLD UP HOLD UP HOLD UP—”

he’s giggling at this point bc it’s so funny to him

“HOLD—YOU’RE?? in this tute too??”

“are we??—”

“—in the same class?” yall say that in unison bc that’s the proliferation of a Wholesome Friendship™ right there

u laugh bc wow this is my new best friend

“this is crazyyy”

“yeah what the f..” he highkey cuts himself off bc i mean day 2 guys

but then you

“exactly what the fuck...”

lmfao he knows then that it’s ok to swear with you

n e ways

y’all keep talking until your tutor arrives and lets you in the class

ofc you sit next to each other in the tute as well

you have a great time and class ends quicker than you thought bc you’re having fun and that’s always gewd

so the next few weeks u’re just vibing with each other

walking to class together after ur lectures

walking each other to other classes

studying together in the library in your spare time catching up on content and exploring ideas discussed in tutes for your shakespearean sonnets class

"o romeo, romeo, wherefore were thou and juliet teenage dumbfucks”

he couldn’t stop laughing at that for three days straight

“t..teENAGE /wheeze/ dUMBFUCKS HAHAHAHAHA”

getting pretty close basically

sharing hobbies and music tastes (u find out he plays guitar and it’s the biggest possession he brought into his dorm from his house and listens to frank ocean and john mayer a lot, watches fullmetal alchemist)

sometimes you’ll come to meet him at the benches full on catwalking down the path with your airpods in and resting bitch face on listening to some dope shit while the crowd parts for you and he’s just like O.O

how is she friends with me

he thinks you’re so cool it’s cute

but he’s also alr convinced himself that you’re so out of his league he highkey won’t dare try and make a move

n e ways

he sees ur airpods and he’s like “aren’t you afraid you’re gonna lose them one day”

and you just look at him and go “do i look like a fool, marcus”

he laughs so hard at that

complaining to you abt his roommate in real time over text like

marcus the fool 🤡: “dude he’s whining at me to ‘play with him’ i don’t want to play with him”

marcus the fool 🤡: “now he’s getting jealous of u”

marcus the fool 🤡: “he asks who u think u r”

you: “tell him i would fight him”

marcus the fool 🤡: “he says u won’t win”

you: “bet”

marcus the fool 🤡: “i told him u don’t need to fight for my attention bc uve alr got it”

marcus the fool 🤡: “now he’s fake crying”

marcus the fool 🤡: “he’s telling me to leave the house and leave the kids”

you: “am i a homewrecker now”

marcus the fool 🤡: “he calls u a homewrecker”

you: “tell him i’ll kiss it better”

one day like a month or so into your friendship

you rush to the benches with that look on your face that says you’re about to murder someone which usually disappears when you see him and take out your airpods bc rbf

so he ,, approaches with caution ,,, easy does it,,

yes he’s wondering if it’s your time of month

ngl it åctually was which makes things worse

t e n t a t i v e l y he asks on the way into the lecture theatre

“hey dy/n u ok?? u look.. ok nvm”

bc u lowkey glared at him but u didn’t mean to i swear u just looked at him but u were alr in a bad mood

so ure like “sorry yes i’m fine i didn’t have my coffee today so i may be a bit cranky”

“what happened? u sleep in or smth”

“yeah i slept at 4 last night”

“wHY did u do that”

“idK but i was running late just now and the line at the cafe was so long i stood in line for five minutes and i said nop class is abt to start”

“oh okey”

this keeps bugging him all throughout the lecture

so he turns to u when the lecture is over and he’s like

“u have another lecture next right”

“yes marcus i have another lecture that you’re taking with me”

“come ditch with me i’ll shout u a coffee”

“what really”

“for sure, we can catch up on the lecture in the library tonight”

and you remember that you’d made plans with your roommate my/n to go to the library that night anyway so you agree and let him know

so he’s like “oh rlly? can i bring my roomie along too he probs doesn’t have other plans anyway i hear they’re doing some kind of project so he better not be going anywhere” with a lil frown uwu angery mark

“sure don’t see why not. we’ll all study together”

“nice i’ll let him know”

“cool”

cool

u see where i’m going with this

waggles eyebrows

wink wink nudge nudge

click here to continue your friendship with paediatrics!haechan!

I ⇤ | II | ⇥ III

[tfw-no-tennis]

mtmte liveblog issue 11

and here we have to conclusion to the shadowplay arc...

clearly prowl hasn't seen national treasure smh

prowl, what exactly is confusing you about ‘secret government-sanctioned brainwashing facility’

the fact that prowl was willing to go so strongly against his morals to protect chromedome...oof bro 

so the senator is basically professor x and all the outliers are mutants. got it

senator shockwave was just a sexy thot who wanted justice....poor guy

so there ARE gloves on cybertron...am I to just assume that the doctors don't like using them for some reason????? I mean tbf I've known a few medical professionals who don't wear gloves during certain procedures, like giving shots which, imo, yikes I would never, even simple vaccines can cause bleeding, but to each their own...are ppe rules not strict on cybertron, or is there a low risk of infection transfer due to the nature of cybertronian diseases? ah, the real questions 

anyways. I should stop going on extremely off-topic medical rants

I relate to tailgate in his tendency to misspell. these liveblogs would be unreadable if it weren't for spellcheck

ouch, the fact that cd ‘never really forgave’ prowl for leaving the heist party w/out a word, even tho it turns out prowl stormed off w/a final request to keep cd safe and out of it all....cd and prowl are just a big tragic trainwreck huh

its interesting that skids used to be religious, when it seems like he isn't now. Wonder What Could Have Caused That Shift In Ideology! Hm!

oh my god I love how ironfist’s fanboy ranting about the primal vanguard is cut short just as he’s saying ‘a bomb disposal kit once used by-’ bc its like Oh I bet he was about to mention tailgate, yknow, the guy who (claims he) was the primal vanguard’s bomb disposal guy...that's such a great little detail

the stuff we hear from roller about senator shockwave is super interesting - it sounds like he’s been pretty aware of the state of society for a while, and has been trying to combat it from the inside...which isn't going so great, it seems, considering the state of society at the time. 

also the whole ‘modifying people to hold the matrix (sometimes without their consent?)’ thing he’s got going on is. interesting. again, is there any sort of ethics laws on cybertron, seriously guys,

oof, op cares so much abt senator sw :( they were in love okay 

red alert :( 

rodimus is such an interesting character AUGH the fact that he takes red alert’s potential suicide to be a personal failing on his part as a captain...which, yknow, that idea has merit considering rodimus’s part in the whole overlord thing, as well as rodimus having told red alert that ‘everyone thought he was losing it.’ yeahhhhh, that's not quite the approach to take w/someone clearly suffering from a paranoid breakdown

poor magnus has no idea about all the overlord stuff, which is what triggered red alert’s breakdown 

tho, magnus, idk that putting red alert in a cryofreeze chamber or w/e is the solution here. although maybe they’re all just at a loss bc cybertron’s only mental health specialist is current hanging out comatose in a bar

are we supposed to (retrospectively) read into rodimus and drift’s agreement to put red alert in storage as a way of covering up the overlord stuff? did they deduce that he figured out about overlord and that's what caused his breakdown? rodimus seems genuinely distressed about the whole cold storage situation, but is there more to it than ‘I failed as a captain bc this guy had a breakdown under my command’? I genuinely do not remember a lot about the overlord plot bc I was so confused the first time I read it and the second time I was too busy being extremely sad, so.

genuinely shocked that cybertron even has ‘health and safety inspections.’ it just figures that the one ratchet conducted wasn't an actual inspection, but an excuse to prepare for some good ole fashioned heisting

man I love a good heist/break-in

ok so skids rlly is just here for his grappling hook hvbhksddfjbjkdf my man

UH OH SENATE GOONS. never good

whoa, cybertronians have glenohumeral joints?? tho, ratchet says ‘glenohumeral socket,’ which doesn't exist in humans - we have a glenoid cavity/fossa/socket that articulates w/the head of the humerus to form the glenohumeral joint, so, close enough

anyways, that sure was a nonsequiter. ratchet busting out his lock picking skills is dope. do they teach that sorta stuff in cybertronian medical school? maybe its in place of the patient confidentiality lesson

seriously, ratchet sure knows a lot about bombs for a doctor. maybe they also cut out the courses on ppe and patient consent to make room for the cool stuff like BOMB CLASSES

op really DOES like jumping off stuff, doesn't he 

oh no senator :( 

JK HERES OP BUSTIN THRU A DUDES CHEST 

oh no roller :( 

‘remember me how I was’ NOOOO IM GONNA FUCKING CRY. SW AND OP MAKE ME SO SAD. GOD 

op yeeted that matrix bomb like he was trying to make a touchdown or...something. not sure why I chose football, the only sport I dislike, as my metaphor here 

lol it blew up a police station, nice

god, that reveal that the institute that we saw last issue was just one of many....and the one we saw was strikingly awful enough, so the fact that there's a ton more like that....oof

also, again, super interested in the fact that cd was involved in this arc where they see how scary and evil the institute is and then ended up working for the institute - well, the ‘new institute’ - later on

I'm weeping at the ‘big reveal’ for tailgate being that orion pax is optimus prime....its so funny that he didn't know that so it was a huge twist for him and absolutely nobody else hvbakdjhfbksjdf I love tailgate

also. is that the picture somebody drew of op for tg lmao

:D and then skids manages to wake rung up!!! all by getting his name wrong lmao. tho, maybe all the storytelling helped!

oh shit its zeta (prime?), here to talk to op, presumably about becoming the next space pope

HHHHHHHHHHHHHH GOD THAT REVEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!! BROOOOO the senator shockwave reveal slapped me right in the FACE the first time I read this, and that's saying something bc I seriously only understood like 40% of the shadowplay story my first readthru. but the shockwave reveal still had me SHOOK like oh god that was so fucking brutal. jesus

like the fact that the emotionless decpeticon shockwave used to have a completely different look and personality is already crazy enough, but then the tie-ins of empurata and shadowplay? brutal and amazing

like, this is the kinda retrospective backstory stuff that I love. it gives a lot of cool depth to both the characters and the world. I feel like it really helped cement concepts like empurata and shadowplay in the world 

and just, AUGH The Reveal still gets me...im pretty sure in my first readhtru I only picked up the fact that the senator PURPOSELY hasn't been named during this issue, and I was kinda ready for some sort of reveal but also figured it could be someone I didn't know bc of my limited tf lore knowledge, but even I knew who shockwave was and phew that blew me away 

that full-page art spread is fuckin banging also 

anyways, shadowplay arc! I really enjoy this arc and all its genre-hopping goodness, and the framing device of the characters telling a story is a lot of fun. plus we get to see a lot of cool backstory for many characters, and got tons of great worldbuilding for jro’s pre-war cybertron. 

I understood a lot more of the story upon my second (and now third) readthru of the series, which was super rewarding bc the first time I wasn't able to follow a lot of stuff (1st readthru I tended to assume that me being confused about something was due to my lack of previous knowledge of lore/story, so I didn't often analyze stuff seriously, or even employ critical thinking skills lmao). 

also some gnarly stuff went on w/the red alert b-plot, which we’ll pick up with later....

[honkhonkrichard]

21 with reddie

 21. Best Friends Sibling AU

This got way longer than I thought and I’m calling it ‘Get it right the First Time’ after the billy joel song okay ‘njoy! (WC: 1600+)

“He’s adopted. We all are.” Stan said out of the blue, after dinner. 

“What?” Richie asked.

“Eddie. He’s adopted. So is Ben. Bill is too.” He said again, louder this time. 

“I-I mean.. I guessed.” Richie shrugged. “Cause they’re white and you’re-” Richie threw a hand over at Stan. “Not.” 

“Israeli.” 

“I forgot the word.” 

“clearly.”

“I-I didn’t have to know, dude, it’s not a big deal.” Richie stammered.

“You were staring at Eddie the entire meal.” Stan said loosely, eyes never leaving his book. 

Richie shifted. He was staring at Eddie. How could he not? He was… gorgeous. Big grey eyes, freckled, tan skin, wavy blond hair and the cutest little face. He had a look of perpetual surprise and annoyance, like someone just stole his parking space. 

He sat a the table quietly nearly the whole meal, watching the conversation with curiosity and every now and then, his eyes shifted over to Richie. 

Richie couldn’t take his eyes off of the younger boy. He was so… pretty. The light from the dining room was framing his face this side of perfect, and his sweater was too big and it gave him the sweetest little sweaterpaws- 

“I wasn’t staring at Eddie.” 

Stan’s eyes looked up from his book, sharp and intelligent as usual. “Liar.” 

“So what If I was?” Richie said, probably too defensively. “What’re you gonna do about it?” 

“Give you my blessing.” Stan said from behind his book, light green eyes still locked on Richie. 

“I don’t think I get you, Uris.” Richie lied, because he was quite sure he did. Rich hadn’t been subtle with his idiot grin and enthusiasm with trying to talk to Eddie, who didn’t reciprocate in the slightest.

“I think you do, Tozier.” 

“Stanley?” Someone said from the door. 

Richie looked up to see Eddie clamped around the door frame, sweater paws and cute grumpy surprise in full swing. Turns out he was wearing little shorts too. Richie gulped. 

“Yes Eddie?” Stan said innocently, putting his book down.

Eddie shifted uncomfortably and looked Richie over, the frown in his lips grew. Richie felt a blush rise to his cheeks. “Can I talk to you for a second? Alone?” 

“Sure.” Stan blinked, and stood up. He looked considerably older than his siblings, Richie decided, trying not to imagine his hands around Eddie’s thighs. “Rich, you’ll give us a minute?” 

“Course.” 

Stan left the room, and Eddie disappeared with him, leaving Richie alone with himself to think about how much Eddie licking his lips after dinner had drove him crazy. 

I gotta stop. Richie thought, rubbing his face. Gonna go half chub thinking about it too much. He decided to mindlessly fiddle with his bracelets. 

Stan strutted back into the room not longer later, sunk back down into his desk chair, handed Richie a small slip of paper and tucked his hands behind his neck, stretching out like a cat. 

“Get out.” 

Richie’s eyes widened. “Eddie doesn’t like me, does he?” 

Stan shrugged ominously. “It’s me that wants you out.” 

“Rude.” 

“You have a crush on my baby brother.” Stan said simply.

“Baby.” Richie grinned.

“Out please.” 

Richie huffed and grabbed his backpack. “I’ll see you tomorrow though yeah?” Stan nodded in response, and Richie left the room, closing the door behind him (He may be a douche but he wasn’t a barbarian.)

Richie silently gazed into the hallway. All the doors were labeled. Ben’s door was closed, Bill’s was half open (Though loud horror movie noises were coming from behind it.) and what Richie assumed was Eddie’s was wide open; the quiet sound of tapping the only sound from it. 

The horror movie paused and Bill swung his door open, eyeing Richie curiously. 

“Sup man?” Richie waved. 

“W-What’re you doing?” Bill asked, voice lower and more angry than it had been at dinner. 

“Uhhhhh I just left Stan cause he kicked me out and then I got lost in thoughts. What’s up with you?” Richie admitted. 

Bill glared him up to down. Richie wasn’t sure why he was angry. They got along fine at dinner, joked about how they had no idea they both worked at the same place (Charlie’s vinyls, Bill had the day shift, Rich took the night shift) and now he was being judged. 

“If you fuck over my brother, I’ll slaughter you.” Bill promised, and then closed the door. 

“What?” Richie mumbled as the horror movie clicked back on. 

Richie made a face and went down the hall, and couldn’t stop himself from peering into Eddie’s room. 

There were lots of knick knacks everywhere, succulents, a big desk and Eddie curled up in his too big sweater, typing away on a laptop. He noticed Richie, clearly looking at him through the corner of his eye (still surprised and annoyed) and took a deep breath, trying to continue typing. 

Richie gave a him a toothy smile. Eddie did not respond. 

“So… Uh… Do you.. like… Did I- Um.” Richie tried. Words weren’t working. 

Eddie sighed and got up from his chair and then-

closed the door. 

Richie snapped some finger guns at the closed door. “Cool.” He said. “Dope I’ll uhhhhh see you later.” 

- 

That night, Richie nodded along to the music blasting through his headphones, and emptied his pockets. Wallet. Phone. Rings he forgot to put on after he washed his hands for dinner. Piece of paper Stan gave him that he never read. Pop can tab. Wait.

Richie picked up the paper and unfolded it. It had a small message written in red pen on it; it looked like it had been scribbled over relentlessly. It also had a snapchat username.

Snap: KasperEddie youre rly hot attractive and it makes me nervous but i wanna keep talking 2 to you - eddie (the small blonde one of stan’s brothers who gets really nervous around you)

Richie didn’t bother fighting the smile off his face. His day was looking up. Even though it was 11:26 at night. 

He nabbed his phone and collapsed on his bed, adding Eddie’s username, and taking a quick photo of him lying in bed and sent it to the cutie patootie. 

Tozier Boy🤙 (Trashrecords): Heyyyyyyyyy got ur message closing the door on me was rly sex c of u

The response was almost immediate. It was a photo of Eddie’s computer. Looks like he was writing an essay.

Eeeeeeee: Sorry you make me nervous I didn’t know what else to do

Richie grinned wildly and stuck his tongue out at the camera, still lying in bed

Tozier Boy🤙: ill let it slide cause youre cute as hell xox

Then he texted Stan.

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:29): you BASTART whyd u kick me out if eddie liked me

And got a snap from Eddie: A photo of his keyboard:

Eeeeeeee: oh!!! 

“Holy fuck.” Richie whispered. “You are fucking adorable.” 

and he sent Eddie a photo of his ceiling saying just that.

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:35): Because Eddie told me to. Said you made him nervous. He also told Bill he liked you and if you started speaking to Eddie Bill would put 30 rounds in your chest.

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:35): hot damn 

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:36) Also; Ben wants you to come back over and give him “Romance Advice” because you seem “With it” 

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:37): u never told me ben was a grandpa

The next image was of Eddie’s face, which was cute enough, except he had drawn blush onto himself. Eeeeeeee: thank you

Immediately following it was a black screen: omg im covered in acne and im sweaty im so sorry

Richie took a photo of him making a desperate face. 

Tozier Boy🤙: can we go out i need to get you comfortable with me holding your cute little face as soon as fucking possible also can u go call Ben a grandpa its very important

A photo of a confused bed tucked into a beanbag chair: Eeeeeeee: he said stan JSUT called him that fjkdhflkjdhfjdkhjkd

Richie smiled against his pillow, trying to breath slowly to calm himself down. Holy fuck this fucking kid. 

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:45) We’ve made Ben very sad. 

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:45) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:46) He told me Eddie called him a grandpa too and made the “:(” face and then told me you just “Walk with.. uhm.. swagger and stuff. [You] just seem to know what he’s doing..” Little does he know-

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:46) who’s gonna tell him im dumbass

Then Richie went back to Eddie, trying to pull himself together, took a photo of his dog. 

Tozier Boy🤙: so…. did u…… wanna …..hmmmmmmm… go out sometime.?

The next photo was of Eddie’s wide eyes, it was blurry, like he was moving as he took it. 

Eeeeeeee: !!!!!! CAN U BRING UR DOG

“God damn.” 

Tozier Boy🤙: which one I got 2 an old man corgi (Amante/Ames) and this baby (Bellissima/Belle) 

Eeeeeeee: BOTH!!!! I WOULD DIE FOR THEM

Then Eddie sent another black screen. 

Eeeeeeee: Fr though I would like a date. Do you like ice cream?

Tozier Boy🤙: im lack toes and taller ants i love ice cream how about this saturday at noon?

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:53): Eddie’s cackling madly what the fuck did you do

You to Stealink my NOTs (11:53) lack toes and taller ants dude

Stealink my NOTs to You (11:54): Cool. Stop it.

Eeeeeeee: sure!!

Richie dropped his phone to the side and danced against his bed. Waving his hands to The Safety Dance. Dates, dogs and cute boys. Okay. 

He spent the rest of the night talking with Eddie, grinning widely the whole time. 

[thystleandthyme]

Tennis Skirts are underrated

Taken by Black J (a blackpink Jennie fansite) Pictured above: Jennie from Blackpink 

Some of you may have noticed that tennis skirts are coming back in the preppy aesthetic that reminds me very much of what you’d see in a teen’s show about really any upper class students (cough *gossip girl* cough). Emma Chamberlain, who’d I say is a major fashion influence on the younger generation with such a large following who are around the same age as her (i think this is important to mention because since she is a teen (19) her style is adaptable for her main audience), has also worn it in her instagram posts. I’ll go into detail about preppy style later but I think for the majority of people from the west that is where they’re seeing tennis skirts return in pop culture. 

Personally, I started seeing tennis skirts before they were a big closet staple in the west through korean fashion. Even before I became an army I really just loved the way that the typical korean style was cute and comfortable (my go to). Much of my feed was oversized shirts tucked into mini skirts or shorts and honestly it was like my perfect type of outfit. Simple, cute, and most of all easy to wear. That being said, I didn’t invest in a piece until my fashion icon (yes this is about ashley aka bestdressed- are we surprised) because I guess for me I thought it wasn’t mainstream enough for me to wear without people staring. I definitely suffer from the spotlight effect, which is typical for teens, but also I just genuinely like didn’t think I was cool enough-or fit- to wear them. Now tennis skirts are like my favorite item because of both the movement and also they’re just really cute. Like yes sometimes I feel like either a schoolgirl or someone’s anime crush but if I’m really anxious about it one day, they can be edged up a bit with some hardy shoes like docs. I also think platform boots would be dope (yes I still say that unironically- it’s a good word I swear) but I have enough of a height complex as is because everyone was really short at my school so I always felt like a giant. Anyhow, yeah I think more people should rock tennis skirts (I refuse to call them pleated skirts, Im sorry) and even though they’re trendy not many people wear it and I think they should. 

[jewpacabruhs]

bruv im still jus. wow. theres so much to say but. do u kno how good it feels... to be jewish, to accidentally fixate on one eric cartman & love him more than any other fictional character for almost seven years now, and then to see him in a little yarmulke, standing at kyle's side while he recites from the torah? do you know how validating that is?

i gotta get personal for a second here. idk how, but in the last few yrs my relationship with my own jewishness has been deeply influenced and intertwined with south park, as ironic and ridiculous as that sounds. i grew up secular, completely nonpracticing; as a child, i was only ethnically jewish, and saw jews as strictly an ethnicity, and a popularly hated one to boot. and it scared me. ive talked about it before, but as a child hearing about the shoah and about antisemitism, i couldn't understand. i thought it was looks for a while, which confused me, because ive got blonde hair and blue eyes and all my family that got caught up in nazi europe did/do too. i remember thinking as a second grader that i would've been spared for that reason; why didn't a good chunk of my family? but i grew up in a mormon neighborhood, with plenty of other blonde kids, and they stayed away from me like i had a disease. this was before puberty, before my hair got a little frizzier and my nose got a little bigger, when i looked just like any of them. but already, at age 8, i was an outsider. i wasn't one of them and i never would be, and they wanted me to know that.

and then i started to get it. it clicked even more once i got to high school and got called a kike every other day - but prior to high school, you know what i found, and you know what really pushed me towards understanding what being a secular jew in america meant? south park. and as a dumb little sixth grader with no critical thinking skills, you know what shaped my opinions on my own people? south park.

and that's good and bad. good because i do sincerely think kyle broflovski is excellent fictional representation for jewish people, maybe one of the top few ever shown on television. he gets on my nerves at times, but he's good through and through, he's well written and multi-dimensional, he's not a walking stereotype but he still has prominent jewish features that jewish viewers can look at and see in themselves, his morals and viewpoints and beliefs are obviously deeply influenced by judaism, hes deeply proud of his heritage and culture... and that all means a lot to me. and by the amount of jewish sp fans that adore kyle, it means a lot to them too.

the bad thing is, yeah, i can't deny it, during older seasons, cartman's treatment of kyle probably taught a lot of young and dumb viewers how to view jews in real life. have i, as a kyman shipper and cartman stan, justified that within a fictional and narrative context? yes. but it doesn't change the real-world effect; south park, but specifically cartman, since he's the mouthpiece, likely did cause some easily-influenced people to pick up antisemitic beliefs. did this contribute to the rise of the alt-right? debatable, but to some extent, possibly. was that m&t's intention and should south park be canceled and denounced? fuck no, i'll always love it lol, and fuck censorship. but it is something that should be taken into account.

matt and trey clearly regret that, and understand that it's no longer acceptable or fitting or needed in today's sociopolitical climate - or, okay, maybe they don't even regret it; they just understand that when fiction becomes reality, the fictional jackass isn't necessary when there's one right there in real life, sitting in the oval office, yeah? old cartman doesn't deserve or need a voice, not when real, awful people actually have one right now. and m&t are actively trying to change cartman for the better and really, really backpedal on his bigotry, while still doing it in a way that makes sense from a story-telling perspective. it's not a complete uncharacteristic change of character; it's shifting with the times and writing it into the character's arc so that it's a logical and plausible development in cartman's story.

cartman's behavior in the last few seasons is consistent character development. m&t themselves are pushing it, and clearly it's sincere; cartman's not faking. unless they're building up a surprise twist over the last, what, three to four seasons, that he was faking the whole time! woah! if so it better be a damn good pay off, because that's a lot of time invested. though that seems more forward-thinking than sp tends to be. they're intentionally stuck in the short-term, aren't they? plot-wise. but their character development is pretty long-term, and right now, cartman is consistently decent, and if it comes across as faking, it's because cartman's over-dramatic in how he speaks, and trey does that intentionally.

that's a tonal thing, and it's hard to say in a fictional character, but as someone who struggles with empathy myself, empathy and sincerity don't go hand in hand. you can lack empathy while still caring enough to sincerely and wholeheartedly apologize for something and mean that apology. not feeling remorse doesn't mean you can't apologize genuinely; the two don't go hand in hand. you can be mentally ill in any capacity, even a psychopath, and still deeply care about things or people, just not in the way someone else might. so you can headcanon that cartman's still a psycho/sociopath, though right now that's actually kinda going against canon, but don't rain on other's parades if they're happy he's exhibiting healthy growth. besides, and i repeat: what could cartman exploit out of faking sincerity for several seasons? nothing, so why bother? he wouldn't, unless it's literal in-show subconscious growth.

does that mean he's magically developed empathy? no. is it becoming less probable he's a legitimate sociopath/psychopath (while still possibly having better-disguised antisocial tendencies)? yes. does he seem to have better coping or anger management skills? somehow, yes! he seems to be legitimately healthier. does this mean he's no longer accountable for his past misdeeds, and even his present, less-severe ones? of course not! and you can still hate him all you want, but modern cartman is not the same as older cartman, and shouldn't be treated as such. because is this growth? absolutely.

he's clearly healthier, even happier. he's less angry, he's still a little shit but he no longer relies on bigotry or cruelty or anger to get the negative attention he thrives off, rather he gravitates towards being simply annoying. you know why he called ice? pettiness, immaturity, a little bit of spite, and a need for silly revenge. he's being intentionally petty, but going about it in a sly but no longer psychopathic way. less hannibal lector and more, idk, regina george, lol. extremely different on the antagonist scale. and cartman's been both.

and maybe it's personal bias on what type of human is worse within fiction, someone unstable and bizarre with violent tendencies (which is how he's come to be viewed in pop culture & some of the fandom, as a result of eps like scott tenorman must die), versus someone inclined towards pettiness and more silent and, i dunno, social-status-and-pride-driven types of revenge (cartman in general when he's not being particularly awful, tbh)... but i think it'd be pretty universally agreed that the latter is at the very least more tolerable, manageable, and even likeable - and certainly more redeemable. let's put it this way; if cartman continued on the path he was on, he'd be one of those tiki holding fucks, wearing a confederate flag hat, and he'd treat kyle soooo much worse. instead, m&t have turned him into a hypocritical false-woke ignorant dumbass - but that's strongly less problematique than it's counterpart, and it works.

because cartman simply serves a different narrative purpose now. and that's not sloppy writing; it's well-timed evolution of a character that stepped into a pre-9/11, pre-trump, pre-social media world! so much has changed, and south park is reflecting that in its characters, most notably in a character who was stuck in the, what, 1960s with his beliefs? that was fine way back when, but matt&trey are smart dudes - they understand that sometimes things have to change. besides, they love cartman, too. he's their favorite. but they understand that when real people act like him, it's not so comedic or satirical or funny, & they don't want to look at cartman, at their creation who they've invested twenty-two years in, and see the all-too-real hate of modern radical white america.

i think we know enough about matt&trey's social stances these days, and the empathy they've seemed to develop after having kids, to understand that they're no longer in their "apathy is best, everyone is stupid" phase. current south park is left-leaning and admittedly preachy at times, but i wouldn't want it any other way. g-d knows it's better this way than if they'd embraced and decided to appeal to their right-libertarian following instead. cartman's evolved in a progressive and positive way, and it's fucking dope, especially to us cartman stans who so badly want him to be good. and he is good right! he's doing so good!

and i know im up my own ass rn but yall know how much i myself have campaigned for jewish kyman/cartman and how much i just deeply and truly adore it, and to see it actualized in a canon episode to some extent? that meant the world to me. i couldn't believe my eyes. i was tellin lai - that's the most genuine, pure, almost violent happiness ive felt in my soul in years. that was like a straight shot of serotonin to the heart. that simple little scene made me so fucken happy yall dont even know. & theres a lot to be said about the political commentary and plenty of other people are analyzing that, but im a simple jewish kyman & cartman stan and boy ive been fed good fjskfkdkdkfk!!!

[ashlyn-mack]

(liz gillies, 25, non-binary, they/she ) Was that ASHLYN LAURENS ? I heard a rumor they work for the FAUST family, but who knows for sure ? They can be a bit PESSIMISTIC & SNARKY, but I also heard they can be LOYAL & ATTENTIVE. You’ll usually find them at THE DEN in their spare time, when they’re not being an ACCOUNTANT. You may want to keep an eye on that one ! 

Hi ok so I’m parker I’m 21 and I have 3 jobs so excuse the sporadic activity thats oftentimes reminiscent of someone who lives in Australia lmao. So just a little bit about my life so y’all can get a better picture of where my inspiration comes from mostly:

I work at a jazz club in Indianapolis which doesn’t seem that cool but as I’m writing this an amazing band called Kneebody is playing and their music is something you’d listen to while tripping acid. Real neat. I spend most of my nights at the jazz kitchen so a lot of the music I listen to is jazz, R&B, and rock n roll. I’ve decided with this version of ash im bringing some of that jazz cat life I’m experiencing on the daily basis to her.

I’ve been roleplaying since I was 11 years old, and ash is about 3 years old now.

Now that I’ve worked that smooth transition in were gonna talk about my trash goblin, Ashlyn Mackenzie Laurens (call her that and ur dead)

HISTORY:

The Laurens family is originally from New York City, but in the 60’s moved to Chicago after Ash’s grandparents got married. Her grandfather was a lawyer, and through chance alone he began working with the Faust’s. It brought the family from your average Chicago family to being wealthy. Ash’s father, Michael, followed his fathers footsteps and became a lawyer who also worked with the family.

After graduating law school, Michael met Mackenzie. They fell madly in love, but she had no idea of his ties to the Faust’s. They had a child together, Ashlyn, and together they raised her in a family or discipline and prestige. There were no barbie dolls or Polly pockets growing up, instead she had piano lessons and arithmetic.

Around the age of 12, though, things changed. Mackenzie found out about Michaels ties to the Faust’s and left in the night. She held no true love for her child which lead her to leave Ash. ((This is where I get tired of being serious so I’m halfassing it)

Ash was FUCKED UP after this yea?? So she started being a lil rebel bitch and was a sour apple u know how it is. But anyways after like a weeklong ghosting of his lil tween daughter in France. So here’s a lil something w jenni

Oliver used to babysit ash when she was a lil child so during this weeklong ghosting she stayed with the Faust’s and was big mad because 1. Oliver wasn’t there he was in the fucking MILITARY so she didn’t know anyone that well and 2. She didn’t wanna be there she wanted to go w her mom her dad was a shit bag always.

But yeah Michael came back with this BLONDE LADY named Marie who was French and barely spoke English but it’s cool ash knew some French and they both taught each other.

But yeah ash and Marie became tight as fuck until ash went to boarding school in Massachusetts. Because she was a problem child and her dad didn’t want her around. Yay ash lmao.

Her sophomore year, Marie left Michael because, u guessed it, he’s a piece of shit. Another sad day for ash, however, she kept in touch with Marie. She went to France on her breaks mostly to spend time with her.

She fell in love with a boy on her soccer team bc shit was coed there, fuckin advanced ass school u know. But she had her heart broken when she went back to Chicago for college and he went to become some pro soccer player who didn’t have time for her gorgeous ass self.

Lmao right also she got cut off when she came out of genderfluid and pansexual her senior year so her daddy hates her now boo hoo.

So she came to the university of Chicago on a dope scholarship and majored in accounting because she wanted to get away from the life she grew up in. While she was in school her dad got into a fatal car crash bc he was driving drunk and fucking DIED. she managed to get by because that’s what she’d been doing, and when it came time to be an adult on her own she decided she’d get away from the Faust’s. But guess what??? When she graduated she found it hard to find a job that actually took her seriously and paid well enough for her to live in Chicago so she joined back up with the Faust’s and became one of their accountants. So she’s been living it easy for the last 2 years just dicking around Chicago.

[lexosaurus]

Do you ever feel lonely being asexual? I feel like none of my friends understand what it's like and it's so isolating and terrifying and I feel do broken. Have you ever felt this way? How do you handle it? Sorry if this is too personal.

Hey anon! I hope you’re okay! I also hope you’re ready for a long post because that’s what this turned out to be!

Firstly, you are NOT alone. I think every ace feels this way at somepoint or another. It’s super common, especially since there really aren’t many out-aces, there’s virtually no actually helpful resources out there for aces, and most people legit have never heard of asexuality or believe it to be something that can be cured either through sexual acts or medication. The fact of the matter is, that being asexual is very much an isolating experience and it can be really really hard to become comfortable with.

For me, I grew up in a conservative town in a liberal state. So while no one was outwardly aggressive towards lgbt people which gave me a false sense of security, coming out was ROUGH. I lost all of my friends to the point where in highschool I wasn’t allowed in a party that everyone else in my grade went to, I got in a massive fight with my mom and ended up having to move out for a few weeks (don’t worry, we’re super close now), and I ended up going back in the closet which only ended up with me being coerced into having sex a bunch until I finally reached my breaking point. I realized I had to figure this out or I was gonna lose it.

Moving away from that environment was probably one of the main ways that I was able to start feeling okay. I moved to a nearby city, dropped all my old friends, made new ones, joined new activities, etc etc. I made sure my new friends knew I was ace pretty much right away, but I didn’t really talk about it past the casual, “Yeah, I’m asexual. I’ll date anyone but I won’t have sex with anyone. It hurts my body and I don’t like it.” and then that was it. I mean, I answered the inevitable questions that followed as if no, they weren’t dumb questions or invasive, even if maybe deep down I thought they were. But other than that it was just a casual mention, made sure they were chill with it, and then moved on.

And knowing that my friends were totally 100% okay with me being ace was like the best thing ever. They don’t UNDERSTAND being asexual on a deep level, (not even now after 3 years of living together), but I don’t understand how their sexualities function on that deep level either. It’s a two way street. And sometimes with people I’ll even ask them, “Okay but how do you KNOW that you like like someone like that?” and then they’ll have to take a step back and be like, “Oh shit, I guess it’s just innate. Oh damn I’ve never thought about this. Huh. Wtf.” You know, just showing curiosity in their feelings and showing that it’s okay to ask “obvious” questions really does a lot.

But tbh, my friends and I now will talk music or memes way before we’ll talk lgbt stuff. And half my friends are lgbt too. I just chose new friends who I connected and related to on deep levels that had nothing to do with sexuality at all.

The second big thing I did, and this is gonna sound counter-productive, was I unfollowed every ace-centered blog on Tumblr. No joke. I went through my followers and unfollowed EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. I found that a lot of ace blogs, even ace-positive blogs, made me feel good for a second when I saw those ace-positive posts, but in the long run they ended up being really detrimental. Thinking about asexuality like something that needs constant validation is not healthy, no matter how positively it’s presented.

I was in a place where being asexual wasn’t normal in my head and I needed to normalize it, not validate it. Because validating asexuality comes AFTER normalizing it, not the other way around. So I needed to not constantly think about it or read about it or see it all the time. I needed to just watch it casually in modern media (aka watch Bojack Horseman and Saiki K on Netflix), talk about it with REAL PEOPLE irl in casual conversation occasionally, and just in general start looking at it like something as normal and mundane as my brown hair or dark eyes. Asexuality isn’t special, it’s not cool, it’s not sad either, it’s just another normal thing that contributes to me as a person.

So now when a follower reblogs an ace-positive post, I feel good. Like truly good. Not that fleeting good that will disappear in 30 secs and remind me that “oh yeah, there are a lot of people out there that hate aces.” I just get an occasional reminder that, “Oh yeah! I’m ace! Nice! I’m dope af!” 

But being asexual isn’t like in my “top 5 qualities” list. I don’t write my bios and put my asexuality at the top of my “about me.” In fact, I don’t even think i wrote that im asexual in my about me on tumblr lol. It’s not that I don’t like asexuality, it’s just so normal to me I’m just kinda like “oh yeah im ace. i have dark eyes. and 10 fingers. surprise! Okay now back to the good stuff…”

Also, a bit of a sidetrack, but that “everyone’s valid” culture on tumblr is actually super toxic and not good. And so getting away from that is v helpful to your mental health.

The last thing that I did that helped me a lot was actually a bit of a coincidence but I met a girl irl who was my coworker who happened to be asexual too. We worked together for like a year, we totally vibed and started hanging out together a ton, and then one day out of the blue she was like “yeah I’m pretty sure I’m ace too.” It was super dope and just having that one person that I could relate to like that who I also truly enjoyed hanging out with was like a breath of fresh air.

Finding a fellow ace irl that you vibe with can be tough. She wasn’t the first ace that I’d met, but I tend to be a rather blunt person and the previous aces I’d met were all through my school’s lgbt club and they tended to be,,,sensitive,,,(told me i was ableist because I talk loudly and my loud voice was insensitive to their sensory disorders like bitch i’ve got hearing problems i can’t solve but you CAN buy earplugs so lol thank u next byeee),,,BUT I DIGRESS, chill aces are hard to find but finding that one person is so nice. But I should say I was pretty much comfortable with being ace at that point. That was kind of the cherry on top. So if this isn’t available to you, which it doesn’t sound like it is, that’s okay. There are other things you can do in the meantime.

Also, I do have to add that much of the phandom happens to be asexual. Idk how that happened but it did.  So if you ever wanna talk ace-things, I’m sure so many people on here would be DOWN to talk ace stuff. I’ve done it before, it’s fun. They’re all rlly nice.

So yeah that was pretty much how I got from a place where I was so defeated about being ace from pretty much everyone around me to now I’m totally comfortable and normal with it to the point where I have turned several homophobes into lgbt-supporters because “fuck, Lexx is so chill and we vibe so hard but she’s lgbt??? i really like her as a person but she’s bi and ace??? hhhhhh,..,,,,i guess lgbt people are cool idk man ya wow ok.” (Legit one of these homophobes sent me screenshots a few months back where some kid was calling me a slur like on instagram or something and he was like “What, you mad cuz she won’t sleep with you? Get a life.” it was sweet 😊)

[demytasse]

[Shinra & Shizuo] Inebriated Idiocy

     The situation required contemplation of certain moral ramifications, as brief as that consideration might last.

On one hand, alcohol was said to be the window to someone’s truest thoughts; bring about their most genuine feelings and unconscious desires. On the other hand, Shinra was an intellectual that keenly understood the human psyche; he knew better than to believe societal nonsense. In actuality, alcohol only lowered someone’s inhibitions enough to vocalise thoughts exactly as they formed; this included, but wasn’t exclusive to situational opinions, primal reactions to anything remotely sexual, and sober observations that hadn’t been sussed out.

So honestly, Shizuo letting himself into Shinra’s apartment with an odd request might have coincidentally been his own influence, the other day asking for blood and marrow samples in jest, yet again. Which the tease seemed to continue its bumble ‘round his friend’s absent mind.

    Not having much going on up there must explain why it’s still relevant.

His drunken stupour was no different than a conclusion from a simple dream; what was sorted alongside other curious tidbits gained while conscious, and that scientific proposal hadn’t been determined trash or data just yet, despite it being the same ol’ same old.

That being said…

    “What other opportunity would I have short of drugging him myself?” Shinra hummed; gathered vials and tools, bounced through his preparation. “Morally speaking it checks out if I didn’t administer the drug. After all, he came to me pre-doped! Haha." 

He glanced over at Shizuo who somehow managed a cool guy pose upon the examination table, simultaneously a blathering mess — slurring incomprehensible words and half-baked thoughts. All to which seemed on par with what Shinra normally mocked, so it assured that no bad karma, nor bad blood would arise.

    ”…it was the least I could do,“ Shizuo concluded what had been internal dialogue.

    Shinra focused on his assembly, "hmm~? I didn’t catch what you did." 

    "Drink.”

    “Then that wasn’t the least you could do, right? That would’ve been not drinking, since doing nothing is the less than something active.”

    Shizuo looked annoyed. “Meant I didn’t drink randomly, asshole. I did it ‘cause…” he spaced, pinched his nose. “…ugh, there’s a reason. Just…whatever.”

    “That’s fine, Shizuo. Your oldest friend doesn’t need an excuse for your impromptu visit. Especially since you’re granting me the honour of—”

    “Tom!” A heavy hand slammed on the table.

Shinra jumped — juggled a device, caught it by the tubular tail before it hit the floor.

    “E-ehh?” his pulse refused to steady.

    “Tom’s birthday. We went for drinks. 'Parently Vorona’s a heavyweight.”

    Shinra laughed, kind of embarrassed for his friend. “I don’t think that’s actually the term you’re going for…" 

    "She cheated.”

    “How so?”

    “She’s Russian.”

    “You’re honestly the type to play into stereotypes, Shizuo?”

    He groaned, “she shoved vodka on me. 'Don’t handle it well.”

    Of course, it’s some oddball connection, nothing offensive.

    “And she knew that?”

    “No.”

    “So it was more that you couldn’t handle the defeat!”

    The drunk grunted. “Ya wanna die?”

    Shinra waved in mercy, “no no! Let’s just move on!!”

     Though the more Shizuo spouted trash fragments, the more difficult it was for Shinra to sway his conscience that this was alright, as maybe the blood alcohol level was higher than he’d anticipated.

Every step of drawing blood was a joke to Shizuo. He laughed while his sleeve was rolled up, mocked the concentration Shinra wore while he struggled to stick the needle in; knocked the doctor’s glasses askew like a young brat that thought himself a slapstick comedian. 

    Unamused, Shinra adjusted his frames with a latex-free wrist. “Please stop.” 

    “I kinda felt bad. Told ‘im thirty was just a number,” he disrupted the blood-pull with a messy gesture.

    “Shizuo, why are you so animated?!”

    “He said he was twenty-seven! Whoops.” 

    “Yeah, you’re an idiot, we get it,” Shinra paused between a third attempt.     “Probably, haha.”

It was then that he noticed how flush his patient was; how boyish his crinkled features were, and how Shizuo’s jovial nature was too foreign to be anything but drunkenness. Blurredly he watched the other above half-mast lenses, but a thought with prescription clarity hit him in result of the study — the vision of a perturbed Celty demanding that her held out PDA be read.

    //It’s taking advantage of Shizuo!//     //!!! N-n-not in that way, p-pervert!//

It wasn’t actually Celty’s textual wisdom, but his own beratement spoken through her beautiful voice, that of course he’d long ago created for her in place of having none to speak with. It was a flurried dissuasion he wouldn’t follow without her image affixed, whether in physical or mental form.

Thus Shinra was defeated by his own imagination. 

    “Come on,” he sighed, “I’ll set you up on the couch for the night." 

    “Oh…uh, sure.”

Shizuo stumbled off the table and stabilised when a hand supported his back to send him along the path to the living room. As Shinra motioned his follow, he spotted a rolled bandage that he’d previously readied. 

His decade awaited experiment may have been a bust, but he had an idea that might give him a chuckle the next morning.

—

    The recovering drunk studied a cross at the crook of his elbow. It screamed at his memory bank in vibrant fuchsia; with consternation Shizuo recognised the bandage as he recalled swaths of highschool peers wore them after donating blood; an annual fashion accessory that Shizuo never got to sport — only ever able to bling the trash cans with broken needles.

That indicated only one thing in the present: he’d been pin-pricked by an advantageous prick, and he was hardly impressed with how Shinra tagged him without any recollection.

    "Oh! You’re up earlier than I thought you’d be,” the devil spoke at the doorway, audaciously donned his goofy grin, with a coffee mug in hand.

    “Shinra…” he growled, “wanna explain this?”

    “I’m curious to hear what you think it means! I wouldn’t be shocked if you’re either right or wrong.”

The silence grew stronger, Shizuo’s annoyance grew palpable, and for a split moment Shinra mused over the spontaneous prank.

    Perhaps I got tipsy off the atmosphere last night and made my own drunken regret…

Which he externalised as a solo ‘eep!’, a wild scramble upon slippery slipper footing; an aerial trail of coffee in his wake. 

To the carpet’s relief, the liquid was suspended mere inches above it, encapsulated in shadow. With luck, Celty formed it within a second’s notice as she was hastily passed by two scuttling idiots.

    “I’m innocent! Innocent, I swear!”

    “Like hell ya are!”

Celty puffed out air too exhausted for the early hours. 

    At least it’s spilt coffee and not blood spill.

—

    It took a few laps around the apartment for the duo to wind up on opposite couches in a truce. Celty, their moderator, sat close at Shinra’s side to prevent a young death.

    “You see, Shizuo, as you claimed you were in full control of your faculties, so I kindly decided to fulfill your request.” Shinra rubbed at a wallop injury at his crown. “which seemed a fair assumption since you weren’t acting any less intelligible than usual." 

He was forced to squint while Celty futzed with the bent plastic and metal of his glasses. 

    “Lucky you, I’m perceptive enough to notice little details which proved that you were, in fact, inebriated. I stopped before I collected any samples.”

Whether or not Shizuo’s grunt was an invitation for the rest of the schpeel, or if it was an indignant ‘fuck off’ made no difference.     “Feel free to leave a tip for my better judgement. I know it’s not customary for doctor visits, but I’m never too humble to decline monetary praise.”

A shadow placed glasses back on his nose, but he immediately let them slip back down when a glare across the table was in clear view. The hangover effect must of have worked mental lapses between Shizuo’s comprehension of insults, thus he remained in a slump with exhausted shadows below his cold eyes.

    "Yanno, that better be the treatment you give Celty, or so help me…”

    “A-ah, she can’t get inebriated in the first place, or drink for that matter—”

    “So you’d take advantage of her if she could??”

    “No, no! Never! If anything I want her to reveal her own desires to have me sweep her into fits of romance…” he darted his eyes from Shizuo’s disgust.

    ”…buuut I better let that topic be laid to rest.“

—

    "Honestly…I almost wish he’d just done it.”

    //Really?//

    Shizuo nodded in between takes of smoke, “maybe it’s about time I figure out what makes me…me. You know, so I can control myself better…or something.”

    //That’s a noble thing to do, Shizuo…//

He shook his head, wasted half of his cigarette when he extinguished it on the deck railing before he brushed ash into his hand.

    //Maybe do it when you’re sober, though. That way you can feel good about the decision to better yourself and not have it be a drunken decision you accept.//

    “You know,” he smiled, “I like that.”

It wasn’t odd that he agreed with Celty, it was that he wanted his abnormality to be experimented on by his dysfunctional friend; that he was finally ready to face the facts and learn how to work with his condition. Despite that realisation, it was best to ask Shinra with sobriety.

    “Might make him pony up the cash for my blood, though. It’s a hot commodity, right?”

Celty chuckled with a bob of her shoulders.

—

    “And that’s why I always trust my doctor’s instincts over Shizuo. In this case, causality didn’t result in my casualty and I can rest in peace standing six-feet above ground and not under it! Hmm…I should pay respects at the nearest shrine for good measure.

    “At anyrate, I’ll take advantage of the opportunity to showcase Celty’s handiwork of my repaired glasses, a token of her dedication and love for all to appreciate! Even if they’re imperfect, they’re perfect to me. So let’s think of this as a public service announcement, kids: don’t drink and make hasty decisions!”

—

AN: Shinra breaking the fourth wall is one of my favourite things; it’s delightful. (O´▽`o)~♡

Based on one of the headcanons I wrote for Shizuo in a character meme, except it’s a little goofier than when I wrote the HC. Probably because I made it primarily from Shinra’s perspective. \(=~=)/ Thank you, @monopsys for the inspiration to actually write this!