#i did nothing my nights off
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Hackers stole 65M passwords from Tumblr in 2013.
Text
More dude and bruh texts
#UTDR#UTMV#My Art#Cross Sans#Epic Sans#Kross ship#Kinda? Implied maybe?#These two share a bed regardless of relationship. I've just decided#Maybe implied krepic? Because Wick is in my head lol#Epic's collection of pictures of Killer sleeping on Cross grows#He has a whole album on his phone and if Cross knew he would probably combust#Anyway I woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep and my brain would NOT let go of this idea#Drawing this like I'm exorcising the thought out of my head lol#Epic doesn't wanna sleep because nightmares but he does wanna use his bro like a bodypillow real quick#Killer's doing it like every night he must be missing something#Speaking of. Nightmare did see and he does not care#He thinks nothing of sharing a bed because they all do it constantly so this must be normal#His reaction was ''oh good you can wake Killer and tell him too''#And assumes the immense embarrassment coming off Cross is cause he got caught sleeping#TW suicide#Cross is just being dramatic but y'know just to be safe#This is the 3rd thing I've started drawing that involves Killer and Cross and cuddling#I need to finish and post the other two still but this is becoming a pattern lol#Anyway I have to do a shot of cold medicine and go be at work 🎉
190 notes
·
View notes
Text
Happy New Year! 🎉✨
#me#self#selfie#be honest#is my hair giving The Breakfast Club?#I used those overnight curl things#she understood the assignment a little too well#also soz but these were taken the day before new years#I did nothing last night because my birth year starts with 19#and I can’t handle doing things more than 3 days in a row#I deleted these and then reuploaded#sorry had a menty b#insert meme of James Acaster on the bake-off#if you’re still reading hi
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
I AM AT MY LIMIT
Snoopy #90
30/12/2024
description under the cut
[description: a cartoon-style drawing of Snoopy's head. Snoopy is a white dog with black ears. His eyes are shut and his mouth is a horizontal line. There are two large blue teardrops, one under each eye. The text "I am at my limit" is handwritten across the top of the image.]
#peanuts#snoopy#art#90#based on that emoji face meme but i can't find the original ANYWHERE#at least not the entire image unedited. other than on like redbubble listings but i don't want to link those haha#if someone has a link to it please send it to me!! so i can link it in the post. thanks :)#also i have decided to start doing descriptions for each image (which i have been meaning to do for a while)#now that people actually follow this blog and interact with it and stuff#tbh i should've started doing them a long time ago#but the idea of retroactively going back to every post and adding a description kept putting me off... which is silly because it's only#gonna become more work the longer i leave it. so you know. just gotta start doing it#i will endeavour to add a description to all the previous snoopys of the day soon 🤞#anyway i made this because i sent a friend the original emoji image (taken from a redbubble screenshot LOL)#because we have been trying to book a place to stay for a group trip (6 people)#and like i did all the research and made a list to start us off (while letting people know they could add to the list) and sent that around#and made a poll for people to vote for their preferred place#and some people in the group have been taking FOREVER to respond with their opinions about accommodation#like to the point where all the other good places on the list have been booked up now and there is just one left#which luckily is the one with the most votes#and today i was like (about to book that one) ok well before i book i'm just checking that everyone is ok with these dates?#and some of them were like ohhh actually no. we haven't booked our flights yet so we're not sure which days exactly we'll be there#WHAT DO YOU MEAN!#in fairness i should've checked that we were all on the same page about dates beforehand#but like. the trip is literally in like 5 weeks AND during a public holiday like omfggggggg everywhere is gonna be booked out#do you know how hard it is to find accommodation for 6 people#and i don't even know the people who haven't been responding/haven't booked their flights/whatever#they're friends of a friend (who will also be coming on the trip) and i know nothing about them#i think i would be a lot less annoyed if it was just my friends because we would've just hopped on a call and sorted everything out in like#one night. otherwise we know + trust each other enough to make decisions for each other if we can't/don't want to be involved in planning
57 notes
·
View notes
Text
Headcanon that the real reason Carmilla was so preemptively over Alastor being back in town was because between Rosie (excited), Vox (it’s complicated), and the rest of the Overlords (massive gossips. See Zestial.), he’s been the topic of pretty much every conversation in their social circle for the past month.
Alastor: I’m sure you’ve all been wondering where I’ve been.
Carmilla: No. No, I haven’t. And if I have to hear one more word about it, I am going to lose my goddamn mind.
(the three different betting pools running simultaneously were what pushed her over the edge)
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin hotel carmilla#carmilla carmine#hazbin hotel rosie#hazbin hotel zestial#zestial morde#hazbin hotel vox#hazbin hotel overlords#carmilla is SO DONE#Clara; poking her head in: Mom? did you see-#Carmilla: Yes.#Rosie; busting through her office door: CARMILLA!#Carmilla: I KNOW.#Zestial; sitting down next to her in bed that night: Didst thou-#Carmilla; covering her head with a pillow: YES! I HEARD ABOUT ALASTOR! VOX RAN UP AND DOWN THE STREETS IN FRONT OF MY OFFICE SINGING I#FOR LIKE AN HOUR#NOW LEAVE ME ALONE#Zestial says nothing else but quietly turns her cell phone ringer off when she’s not looking
277 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
68 notes
·
View notes
Text
pip... pippa ingellvar... never posted her final look.... look at my queen
#rookreveal#she went thru sm changes#dragon age#datv#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age veilguard#datv spoilers#kinda?? just screenshots#pippa tag#might post the biggest infodump ever of her soon#long post#ok infodump my MOURNWATCH WARRIOR GIRLYYYYY her name is phillippa but pippa but pip for short#rook because shes very much a go straight and attack type character#was found by 3 spirits in the crypts and is quite literally ice age baby. they brought her to the watch#raised by a very elderly couple then went into the watch. still is friends with the 3 spirits. when one of the couple died she ran away#it was a bad time in the city streets and came back later after being found#was tasked a lot with being in the lowest level of the crypts because. crypt baby. elf (can see in the dark). warrior. spirits like her#this caused her to be trapped in the necropolis constantly... and was left starving and in the dark a lot.#would survive thanks to spirit pals. bugs. and flora#had black eye whites for a time from being underground also#anyways her spirit pals got corrupted and destroyed and saved her in relation to the precursor to the war of banners#in her rage she did a whole rebellion. saved the day. had nobody left. to top it off was kicked out#varric found her sobbing and crying with snot and everything cause she knows nothing about the surface.#they played a game of chess and hes like come join my band and shes like ok.......#and yeah then veilguard happens. she takes being a leader seriously so she takes hard decisions seriously#stern angry muscle punch lady but also if not threatened shes funny laid back and kind#she also never sleeps. why is her room so bright. so she spends every night in the dining room by the fire and chats with lucanis#(been watching boston legal so very much like the ends of those episodes where they chat on the porch)#her best friend i gotta say DOES end up being lucanis. and in my playthrough yes she romanced him but even if she didnt theyd still be bffs#shes close with everyone to be fair
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
Grinds my teeth to dust…. i wish touch didnt have so many Implications. im just trying to survive out here
#after all this i need a cuddle and a movie But who do i ask withoit them thinking im coming on to them#i need to paint a giant doomsday-guy-on-the-street-corner style sign to wear around my neck that says I AM AROMANTIC ASEXUAL#born to hug and kiss all my friends forced to stand around hands in my pockets#im scared to death of people misinterpreting my behavior or feeling uncomfortable#od be so much more relaxed like at a core of my being level if this was a nonissue#dude im desperate i might just ask the guy i almost fell asleep on tje otjet night#the ice is broken and he already knows my deal#(fantasizing about snuggling with people i like) im so fucked up ….#it’s also made way worse by tje fact that I apparently come off as very flirtatious#im playful and i love people Sorry …..#im like All or Nothing . oh my god lol#i had a friend who called me her ‘koala’ because i was constantly clinging to her#we were 7 so it was socially acceptable#99% of the time we were together i was wrapped around her legs or torso. i miss you so much sybil#the start of the end was when i innocently restrd my chin on my friend’s shoulder to watch what he was doing#and the next day someone asked me why i did that#i was like huh…? he’s my friend?#why wouldn’t i?#then i felt all weird about it And ive felt weird about it sincd#unrelated but my best friend is autistic she has misophonia and hates touch But im the misopjonia exception(real thing) AND#i’m one of the only people she hugs. straight up my biggest flex ever
19 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hey how’d your date go? What’d you end up wearing?
-🧎
aww thank you for asking!!
Here's the look <3
MEN DNI
#At the advice of my friend who told me to wear quote a slutty top and fun pants which is silly bc I'm more a big sweater tiny skirt girl#This was pre hair and makeup dw#The date was nice v chill she bought me a couple drinks and I stayed the night at hers a little makeout cuddle times#We did have a cute makeout ses in the bar when we deciding to get more drinks and she did the Knee Thing and I was like oop time to go now!#asks#love letters only#💌 asks#That was sweet of you to ask!! How are you doing sweetheart??#🧎anon#omg forgot to tell u guys I got her number irl on public transportation like one stop before she got off it was v meet cute!#So I knew nothing about her v cute and fun I'm not an Apps girl#But the train was so full she offered to let me sit next to her which I declined but I was smiling at her and she made small talk!#And we had to reschedule a bunch so I thought she would give up but she was really trying!
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
Tissot Sprint, Aragon GP 2024
#marc’s times on lap 2-7 of the sprint would’ve still gotten him pole during qualifying lmao!#two of jorge's laps under pedro's q2 time too marc was onto something when he told jorge he'd probably have set a better time in q2#if he hadn't crashed in the beginning#no one outside the top 3 did any 1’47 laps although enea as usual had great late race pace#marc had eased off by lap 8 as well with the almost 4 second lead he'd built by then#mm93#motogp#aragon gp#finally wrote my proposal i'd been procrastinating yesterday night i have nothing to do all day today 🥳
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
god forbid a man be a bit silly … god😒
#wwe#wwe raw#the judgment day#finn balor#monday night raw#raw#rhea ripley#free him he did nothing wrong#unrelated but finn looks so good in a hoodie#just had to get that off my chest#jds “what abt..” n pointing to finn like finn isnt the reason hes IN tjd 😒#i hate him so bad
113 notes
·
View notes
Text
— But it's almost midnight. — Oh, that's the point! At the stroke of twelve, he turns into Dracula. C'mon, Vicki – he won't bite.
pose ref.
#dark shadows 1966#victoria winters#roger collins#➤ roger collins & victoria winters. ┊ pain sometimes precedes pleasure，miss winters.#vamp roger au tbt#➤ roger collins. ┊ I and my ghosts want a drink.#➤ victoria winters. ┊ because she’s lost and lonely. because she looks in shadows.#➤ edits & art. ┊ the evans cottage art gallery.#art.#i always feel a little apprehensive about putting r/v things in the general tags bc i know that's not everyone's cup of tea but.#if r/v squicks you out and you don't have me blocked idk why lmakldfgfg. that's what we do here.#well! did you know that the moonflower is a highly poisonous and psychoactive flower that belongs to the nightshade family#and can cause respiratory depression arrhythmias fever delirium hallucinations psychosis and death if taken internally.#and they are night-blooming and pollinated by sphinx moths. much to think about.#scenes from the vamp roger au that i've been plotting with tortie and have only posted like one thing about but. anyway.#should be making violent love to you behind a palm tree etc. but the moonflowers in liz's greenhouse will have to do.#yeah yeah yeah we've all heard about his more famous triangular cousin but what about the real collins vampire huh.#who was here in 1966 draining years off another man's life. who spent ten years in a coffin (augusta) and came back wrong.#who knows nothing but a habitual; driving; consuming thirst.#who feeds on the youth and innocence of his governess – of his sister's hospitality – of the shelter of the collins blood.#who prefers; instead of living; to bury himself in the collins tomb.#who creates not biological sons but makes other men into monsters just like him.#also lou was really hot as a vampire for 0.5 seconds in hods.
39 notes
·
View notes
Text
THE BEST OF MASS EFFECT: VIRMIRE
Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard and Cmdr. Dominik Shepard With: Lt. Kaidan Alenko, Gun. Chief Ashley Williams, Urdnot Wrex, and Tali'Zorah nar Rayya Ft. Special Guest Appearances by: Spec. Saren Arterius and Sovereign There is a realm of existence so far beyond your own, you cannot even imagine it... Mass Effect: Legendary Edition (2021)
#mira makes gifs ✨#sophie shepard#dominik shepard#kaidan alenko#ashley williams#urdnot wrex#tali’zorah vas normandy#mass effect#me#mass effect legendary edition#dailygaming#it’s been so long since i’ve made a BEST OF: lol but virmire called to me the other night#this isn’t really the same as the ME3 ones i’ve been breaking from tbf but also virmire is my favorite mission in ME1#and tbf this is a BEST OF: ME in general#i might make a series but i'm not quite sure yet this was just something that popped into my head when i was playing a UNC the other night#but i did get to use both the kids this time!!! :D#my favorite mindoir twins :)#bc we love BOTH sheps in this house!!!#but this was a lot of fun! i got to do some more interesting stuff with the editing and the coloring than i usually do :)#i was also planning on using a vision shot? but those are so jittery (right word?) in gif form that i scrapped it tbf#also pls excuse soph looking different in literally every gif pack i release lmaooooo#this is the last iteration of her head i promise lmao (actual canon ME1 appearance i swear ignore everything else lol)#finally fixed that sculpt and gave her her piercings and i think she matches up with dom a lil better now :)#tbf dom also went through 50 other iterations of his sculpt but i never giffed those. those are just in a screenshot folder on my PC lmao#i was gonna say OG dom versus now dom isn't that far off but tbh dom did have a CC head at one point#i call that head dan now bc i don't associate it with him anymore it looks nothing like him LMAO#OG OG soph looked crazy different too tbf. and she was an adept at one point before i scrapped that entirely.#oh OG versions of my kids how different you looked and how much you have changed#but the kids are alright! and i'll stop screaming about them now. :)#i’ll stop using the tags to rant now even if it is the mira special™️ but have a good day wherever you are!! :D
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
all i have been able to think about today is that silly little knife game where you stab the spots between your fingers and try not to hurt yourself and how that silly little game is SO horrorkiller. i cant explain it it bothers me so much that i cant explain it but it just does its so them
they play it when theyre bored. because when in doubt bodily mutilation and the risk of hurt and pain is always an appealing one. and when i mean they i just mean killer because horror wouldn't wanna just hurt himself on the fly like that for funsies. he likes to see others hurt because hahaha FINALLY some damn entertainment!!! but hurting himself???? nononnno hes already got enough body pain as it is oh and killer has already grabbed his hand and started playing (and now horror can't back out because killer's got him sucked in the game)
they sing the silly little song. horror has all his fingers the knife goes chop chop chop if killer misses the spaces in between horror's fingers will come off! and they are both enraptured and both captured in this childishly morbid game. it's so anticipatory because they both know its all up to killer to decide if horror gets hurt. hes more than precise enough to keep the game going for hours long without ever hitting horror but would he want to keep it going for that long? horror doesn't know how long killer would want to wait before getting to see him react to getting hurt
and killer does eventually do it even after theyre sung the song over and over countless times and tried different harmonies and finally killer decides to end this little song and dance and stab into horror's hand. maybe he decides to do a finger. maybe the palm if he really wants to piss horror up. its sudden its surprising and GODDAMN is it painful!!!! horror's trying not to show it but with all the sweat and the way his fingers are twitching killer can see that it hurts him. it's a bit amusing :3
and then horror grabs the knife from killer and they do it all over again but this time horror's the one doing the stabbing. he's not as precise as killer. he hits him a lot more than killer hit him but goddamn it he is in PAIN and wants to let it out because hes annoying and irritated and goddamnit would killer just stop looking at him with that blank smile while he's bleeding out from his hand???? yeah horror's pissy
horror's annoyed and trying to get some form of petty revenge on killer (he likes it when he finally manages to get that stupid smile to falter just a little bit) and killer's watching horror desperately try not to just stab the knife through his oh so very exposed soul that he could very easily hurt if he really wanted to hurt killer. anyways the game finally ends when either one or both of them get bored! but thats fine!!! killer will get bored again and horror will end up escalating it to a messier point than it was before and the only thing that'll get hurt is the surface that they use to stab between fingers. oh and eachother of course :p
#just know that this was based solely off vibes going on in my head#none of this makes sense at all and i have no idea how to express what im thinking but DAMMIT i know what im talking about!!!!!#two sadists walk into a room. one of them enjoys pain one of them doesnt. they make out (horrorkiller)#i just really think theyre neat. it would be sweet to hear them sing that song. it fits them so well#horrorkiller has the knife game. kist has russian roulette. what does horrordust have#what homoerotic dangerously reckless game could horrordust play??? i dont particularly know..........#i remember playing this game when i was younger except i used a pencil. because i dont wanna fucking stab myself????#the song starts off by mentioning that they get drunk first which like. yeah that seems right#horror would start the game if he were first that way he'd get first turn and then get whiny when killer does it back#the knife goes chop chop chop NO IT DOESNT SILLY! the knife cuts the axe chops :3#horror's voice is all shaky and unstable from the anger and pain while killer's is smooth and calm despite him being hurt more#the dichotomy >>>> i love horrorkiller theyre my favorite mttduo!!!!#guy who feels too much and guy who doesnt feel enough. guy who tries to feel nothing is also there but this isnt about dust ok#cringe stuff i removed from the post: horrorkiller holding their mangled hands together while they play this game#the red and black of their blood mix together and drips on the floor from their ruined hands :3 so sweet..........#because horror needs a thing to squeeze while trying to pretend that killer stabbing through his fucking wrist doesnt hurt 💀#dust knows exactly what game they played the night before when horror starts wearing full gloves. and killer ditches his fingerless ones :3#kiiiillllerrrr stop showing off your stab wounds from your buddy thats not family friendly nor is it straight 😒���😒😒#tricule hc#killer sans#horror sans#dust sans#murder time trio#he's MENTIONED (like always. if the 3rd member of the trio wasn't mentioned in tags who would i be)#sans au#utmv#horrorkiller#horrorkiller nation (grand total of 5 people) cmere pspsspspspspsps#1/10 DONE for christmas uaagahhh. why did i tag this hrkl when technically all of my posts could be seen as mttpoly anywausLMAO im so tired#off to do the other 9/10 posts i have to finish.....hahahahaah iM SO TIRED WEARE STILL NOT OPENING GIFTS YET WTF PLEASE I WONT STAY AWAKE
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
also "textless" versions of these, wahooo
#corned beef#joe iconis christmas extravaganza#bsol#speaking of >:3 & >:3 third time's the >:3 in successfully slammed both up against the window of joe iconis's car (twitter @'d & Seen)#which is really just a :3 but whom among us (orchestra hit) is not a little impish with it#first year i did fanart like wouldn't it be fun if joe saw & liked this. second yr like Same plus it did happen last time#then also recency Fun Times bias sure but he did make it a frame in his End Of Year Good Times Celebration video like >:'3#yes i draw exactly what i wanna draw b/c it's some specific thing i enjoy that much so Yep that is the xmas show to me#so powerfully i was moved like ooh fun xmas villain wrole?? in '19 when i was paying attention & relieved of some bmc closure malaise#by the xmas show but obv Least aware / knowledgable lol. technically showed up in '18 around nov/dec but no chance Right then of tuning in#i mean i had the capacity but did not know it existed / even Less helpful preexisting context. anyway so by the time the show returns#& i've done research in between & gone my god i am i live laugh loving like Yeah i'll do more fanart & omg cyril & omg krampusfucking#able to ramp it up this year & like just thanks to Drawing Experience i'm better at forging ahead through thee process even when it's#extra ambitious like my god am i in over my head? well keep swimming for the surface like only several times going [aaa....] only to yknow#not be that tripped up anyway but still go [(celebrate) christmas!!! (with me)] & be like Do It For The Krampusfucking Gift#one post for another like lighting up my life joe just coming out like ''who wants clips. first up Full Cyril Fucks The Krampus number''#like jeez made that happen And passed it along....it's always the like epitome of my art like i make the specific often really niche stuff#i really respond to; does anyone else enjoy this? if yes; Wheeee; sometimes this is also ppl Behind the really niche shit i enjoy#like i truly hope you do get that kick out of it as i slam it up to the window; worth a Highlight Of Your Year or not#the power of [i do like to Draw the things i latch on to] + [internet] for you#really the bsol design even More an event in ''how did i even do this'' b/c even when planning to make it slightly easier like well#fewer figures; i'll use ink pen so i hone the lineart less than i would to precisely get [line weight mostly irrelevant] Line Geometry#yet still going ruh oh i'm honing for sure. but then like did Most of the lineart all in one night + all the coloring the next round#when i draw quite slowly / the Honing is virtually always an inextricable part of my process like i do Nothing in less than Hours#like i think even my freewheeling bsol sketches posted just this morning took me at Least an hour; judging by vids i played in the bg lol#not quite calibrated to have Attuned Confidence In My Ability To Forge Ahead thusly like oh no if i don't have Momentum or it doesn't#happen to be one of those times things just spontaneously come out great right off without more honing / consideration we're fucked....#not actually the case but yknow still realizing this lol But still able to just pat myself on the shoulder like It's Manageable & it is/was
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
pls i need to provide updates
#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year#and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire#and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f#friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl#acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what#are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and#friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after#everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to#invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me#i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother#and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids#so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo#any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd#and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk#THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date#w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a#few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay#scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK#like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl#like is that even doable#but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much#.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us#god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x#but it would be soooo funny#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed#popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x#i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like#its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
I had been worried that cutting my dad off and distancing myself from him would put me in a difficult position with his side of the family but I've actually reconnected with a couple family members over how shitty he's been and it turns out I'm not the first one to stop talking to him, he's been blocked by like two of my aunts And my cousin
#my cousin texted me out of nowhere yesterday and we've been chatting which has been really nice#and I asked her like btw did my dad send you to talk to me and shes like oh God no I haven't talked to him since he got drunk and rampaged#and I was like oh which time and she's like the one a couple months ago and I was like ayy me too lmao#so! turns out the only person who is straining and breaking familial relationships is him 🤔#not that he'll ever see the pattern that his sister and aunt and two of his nieces AND his ex wife/baby mama AND his own kid#have told him to get his shit together and stop being an asshole to everyone#but yknow#if he stopped drinking it'd solve 25% of his problems and therapy would solve another 50%#but he refuses to stop drinking or listen to anyone but other brainwashed trumpheads so! fuck 'im#dad mention#alcohol mentioned#anyway. feeling better about my choice to stop talking to him#he went off on my mom today and called her a lot of horrible things and accused her of leading him on#when she has actively been telling him since they got divorced TEN YEARS AGO that nothing is ever happening w them again#but since he doesn't listen to her he didn't hear it and just dug his pity party hole deeper#anyway. back to my night having a nice time and having a good relationship with basically everyone else in my family#unlike some people 🍵 🐸
11 notes
·
View notes