#i did also do some online shopping to get some things I've been needing

[jedi-bird]

Partner decided they wanted to go to ikea today and I'm not one to turn down a trip to the labyrinth of interesting things. Managed to get the shoe cabinet we wanted as well as a coat rack. Found a very cheap but very nice small bookshelf for an awkward area of the work room. Partner wanted some sound proofing things for their office for recording purposes, so they for sound dampening tiles and a rug. I'm pretty sure the cabinet I've been drooling over is about to be discontinued and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Tomorrow I need to work on the Christmas stuff (decorations for the tree and sorting out ceramic village boxes and measuring the space under the stairs again), hang some prints I framed this weekend, and start building furniture if there's time.

[honeytonedhottie]

get ready to get back to school⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🗒️

i can hardly believe that school is coming up. in like, two/one week. ISNT THAT ABSURD? i feel like summer just flew past but im very excited to start my junior year of highschool…💬🎀

BUYING DREAM SCHOOL SUPPLIES ;

when ur school supplies are cute, you'll feel MOTIVATED to put them to good use. idek what it is. 99% of my school supplies are pink and because of that im motivated to take good notes, study my notes etc because seeing the sparks of pink just make me so HAPPY.

so ofc this year my school supply list has remained consistent in its color scheme of pink, pink and more pink 🎀. some things on my school shopping list are ->

notebooks

a binder

dividers for the binders with adorable labels

pink and purple gel pens (along with black gel pens)

pastel highlighters

looseleaf paper

a fluffy pink pen

FIX UR SLEEP SCHEDULE ;

ik a lot of us (including myself some times) stay up for way to long and feel like our sleep schedule is BEYOND repair but it is not. u need to be getting back into a consistent sleeping routine that keeps u healthy and well rested not only for back to school but for ur own well being. you'll have plenty of time tomorrow for what u choose to stay up all night doing, i promise.

FOR MY ONLINE GIRLIES ;

so this year i'll be taking a semester online so i've been dabbling in figuring out the perfect routine for an online school regimen. one in which i could balance personal and academic life in a healthy way (get sunlight everyday, sleep on time etc) some things that im going to prioritize while doing a semester online are ->

♡ getting fresh air everyday

♡ going for a walk everyday and making sure to stay active

♡ NOT doing school work in bed

so a tip i've learned is that the things that u do in bed, your mind will like, associate ur bed with it. so for example if ur constantly playing video games in bed, when its time to relax and go to bed, when ur in bed your mind will be like "time to play video games". so i will not be doing school work in bed, also for a healthy change of scenery…💬🎀

♡ going out with my friends and calling them everyday so that im not isolated

♡ keeping a steady and productive routine

SETTING GOALS ;

lets be goal oriented, A+ academic barbies this year ✍🏽. to make sure that ur doing ur very best its important to set goals for urself. having something to strive for is a great way to stay motivated and disciplined during the year. my goal for my junior year is to keep my straight A streak and finish with my law distinction (im 3/4 of the way done). and ofc its important to break down ur goals, and i'll give an example of how i did this.

so in freshman year ik i wanted a distinction in law, and to get a distinction in law i would have to take 4 separate law courses. there are 4 years in highschool so if i took one law course per school year i'd have my distinction. but i wanted to expedite the process so i took one course freshman year, and two courses sophomore year. this year i will take one more.

this frees up SO much time for me to get another distinction and since i've already taken a course of business in freshman year, i'll strive for my business distinction too…💬🎀

if u dont know where to start with goal setting for school here are some ideas ->

♡ maintain ur current GPA or try and raise it

♡ never get below a B on any assignment or test

♡ do every single homework assignment (never take a zero)

STAYING ORGANIZED ;

staying organized is CRUCIAL for being successful in school. i use notion to keep myself organized during the school year. by putting down dates for tests in my calendar, ik when i need to start preparing. and by making a todo list everyday i can stay on top of my assignment.

if u struggle with school organization, set aside an hour a day to just make sure that everything is in its place. and it doesnt even have to be an hour, just set aside time every single day to make sure that everything it where its supposed to be. it'll save you SO much time in the future and you'll rly thank urself for it in the future.

and to end this post, i'll share some school/academic related affirmations 💗

🗒️ im literally the definition of beauty and brains

📔 im the top of my class

🗒️ i must have perfect memory cuz i remember everything im taught in class

📔 im literally a GENIUS

🗒️ i effortlessly stay at the top of my class

📔 wow, im smart, pretty, AND talented?? god rly does have favorites

[sleepymccoy]

I have some general anxiety about going to supermarkets aimed at specific cultures because the intended clientele is not lil white me and the staff often don't speak english and I feel inappropriate. But not once has this been true, and I've always enjoyed my visit. Anyway, that's a preface so you can appreciate how brave I am

My colleague recently made me lahpet which is a Burmese salad including pickled tea leaves, dried beans mix, and tomatoes. I loved it and wanted more. I live in a densely Chinese area and thought one of the many supermarkets might have something Burmese, so I brought the empty jar to every store.

Many don't speak english, but that's fine. I had a jar! All interactions basically went like this;

None of them knew Burmese so couldn't even tell me if they had something similar

I gave up and bought it online. Also had a hard time with that cos they don't deliver to apartments (got the vibe that it's just the shop owners son doing deliveries and he couldn't be fucked going upstairs. Valid). But I persevered and got three jars! And the dried beans mix I needed. Way too many dried beans, I totally misjudged the size of the bag being sold

I used one to show my friends this salad. They didn't go as insane over it as I did. I gave another jar to my dad who did go appropriately insane. He said he liked it, then five min later interrupted to say he really liked it, then after dinner spent time with me going through the ingredients and trying to figure out if he can pickle tea leaves himself. Booyah.

Regardless, this left me with one jar which I swiftly finished. So I'm on the hunt again and the online store stresses me out now cos they don't like apartments

I found a Burmese supermarket a few suburbs away and a twenty min walk from the station. Fucking worth it, it's added two hours to my commute home but I want these jars so much. I enjoyed the stroll. It rained a bit, so I saw a couple rainbows

In the store I was, again, immediately stressed. I went down an aisle and back again and found nothing. I found other pickled things! But not my tea leaves! I did not want this trip to be in vain, it was long and I had a shit day at work. I was really only doing it today cos the days a write off as a bad day so I may as well run an annoying errand

Anyway I pulled up the website and showed the lady at the counter a photo of the jar and she pointed me to them immediately. I returned like fifteen seconds later with four jars and she was already on a phone call with someone. I love workers rights. You're awesome, lady.

So I say four and hold four fingers up and pass her one jar. She scans and sets the price right. She then interrupts whoever's talking on the phone to ask me, "How you know this?"

So I quickly explained that my colleague made me the salad and I loved it. She pointed back at the aisle and said, "the beans, you need beans." So I was like "I have so many beans, I bought too many, I just need the pickled leaves." And she was already waving her hand at me in disinterest so I stopped talking and paid lol.

It was a long haul home. I passed and remember to take a photo of my favourite art installation, the tower of coffee cups in a pole.

There's no starbucks in my suburb so one of these at least has taken a long trip to get here. So did I today, my feet are sore

Anyway, I have four jars of miraculous pickled tea leaves. If you can figure out how to buy these ingredients I recommend it to serve alongside very fatty meals like lasagne or sausage cos it cuts through nicely. I also take a serving to work every day because the tea leaves are caffeinated so I'm skipping the second coffee

I love lahpet

[legy]

hi! i'm caelum. you might know me from @goldentruths-pod or from posting online. im in a financial quicksand pit and i really, really, really need help.

i'm disabled and receive approx ~$950 a month from social security. this has gone from "rough but survivable" when i first started receiving SSI to "i am literally not making ends meet" in 2024. right now my current status is that i am covering my basic needs but any kind of extra purchases are impossible. and the extra purchases i need to make keep piling up because i just can't afford them. some things i need include, in vague level of priority:

dolphin, my cat, is years overdue for a vet visit. this is going to be $300 minimum, possibly more because she has an adversarial relationship with the vet. she needs dental work done which they had quoted me as being $1500 but ive been putting it off for so long that i would not be surprised if that's more expensive too

i have learned today that my gold crown needs to be replaced. really unhappy about this one. it was a miserable experience the first time (everything that went wrong did go wrong, i'll spare you the details) but what is relevant here is that my insurance does not cover this and it was $900 last time. insurance also does not cover extracting the tooth either so that's cool. i have some time before this one is due (my next consult is in july)

my phone is approaching "unusably broken". i've had it for close to 4 years now. the call speaker no longer works (i can only use the phone on speaker mode) and it struggles to run apps or a web browser which makes things like GPS pretty dire. this would be like ~$100-$150 probably, i havent done serious phone shopping yet

my driver's license is expired and i need to get a new one. this was $110 last time. note i havent driven a car in years due to the disability but it's really valuable to have a universally recognized form of photo ID and ive already been hassled over it being expired

god this one is so embarrassing to get into but i had to flee my previous apartment last year due to it escalating into a DV situation. the other tenants did not pay the heating bill, which was in my name (and my dumb ass didnt close the account because it was the middle of february and i didnt want to freeze them to death) so i have a $250 utility bill in collections. i might be able to dispute or debt forgiveness this one but tbh ive been so fucking drained given everything else going on and also my phone barely works so i havent pursued it. especially since i can't afford to pay it if i cant challenge it

i would really like to have a passport again. my previous one was destroyed by my landlord in 2018 but even if it wasnt it'd also be expired now. not sure how much this one costs. likely $200?

my food stamps were slashed in half (covid emergency ending lol) and do not cover my food costs for the month so im paying like $150 a month on food that i didnt have to previously. i can maybe fix this one but im slowly losing my mind from malnutrition from trying to not go into debt and also eat. so i havent had it in me to go 1v1 welfare bureaucracy and possibly make everything even worse

my shoes are probably two months out from fully decomposing. they were $100 three years ago and id like to get something comparable given they lasted me this long

the rest of my clothes are also very literally becoming threadbare, falling apart, or are too big and keep slipping off. i legitimately feel embarrassed to go in public these days because i dress so shitty all the time

insurance doesnt cover my HRT anymore so that's $30 a month i didnt used to have to pay

im sorry this turned into such a ramble. i'm in such a bad way right now, i have been for quite a while and the dental work news is really just the final straw. i can't really have a fundraising goal because due to the SSI asset limit i can never own more than $2000. & i'm aware both that this is the poor people sending each other the same 20 dollars website and that there are people urgently trying to raise money to escape an active genocide. but i held off from making this post as long as possible & idk what else i can do

anyway if theres anything you can contribute to help me i would appreciate it more than anything. at the very least i need to do something about my tooth.

http://paypal.me/hivehum

[starrysharks]

these questions are pretty similar so i'll answer both at once.

to buy from a chinese indie brand, you need two things: the brand's taobao link and a proxy site account. taobao is a chinese storefront (?) that most of these stores are hosted on. there are plenty of western stores online that also carry taobao brand clothing - like arcana archive, glitch cupids, and pixie rebels - but i would recommend just getting your stuff from a proxy as those stores often up the prices of the clothes.

note that it can be a bit of a struggle to get the taobao link of a store, especially if you don't have an account (which is notoriously difficult to get these days), but i did find some link lists! (mostly lolita stuff as that's what taobao is most popular for among alt fashionistas ^_^)

some other brands that i recommend -

eyeelike - y2k inspired, though their stock is usually very limited. sizes up to UK 10-12 (L) i believe

link (lemme know if it's broken):

frufru - bright, colorful, sorta harajuku-esque! i heavily recommend their star messenger bags, been wanting to get one of my own for a while ^_^

link

and hbreaker - a more visual kei sort of thing! more edgy than the other two stores, but i'm yet to check it out properly

link

so, now that you have the link, you need a proxy site. this is so that you can send the clothes over from china to your own country. in the past, i would've recommended pandabuy, but it died a few months ago due to illegal replica selling. for that, i'd recommend avoiding proxies that allow replicas, because they might go under while you're trying to get clothes shipped. (that happened to me T_T)

some that are reliable are:

sugargoo

superbuy

spreenow

now all you do is use the search bar (make sure it's on the "shop" mode rather than "product"), and plug in the link to the shop you want to buy from, and it should be the first result. get all your clothes, and now all you have to do is have them shipped out! shipping usually costs a lot (£20+ from my experience) and if you're buying a haul, it can be over £200 for just 4-6 items, so i'd recommend only buying stuff you KNOW you're going to wear often and enjoy. shipping should only take 2-3 weeks (at least in my experience - i live in the UK, it might take more time in the US.) and boom! now you can dress like those cool girls on xiaohongshu!

there are also two western stores i'd like to go over that have similar clothes - sixth dimension and minga london.

sixth dimension has many good qualities - they have more inclusive sizing (up to UK XL), reasonable prices based on their quality, and they restock and do sales often. i heavily recommend them if you can't afford the high shipping prices or if the sizing is too limited for you!

unfortunately, i have less nice things to say about minga london. they're highly extortionate in terms of pricing - i've seen shein quality cardigans sold for upwards of £70, for example. they do drops often, and have been accused of fast fashion but i'm not sure if that's legit or not. they've also stolen designs in the past. however, they do have inclusive sizing, up to XXXL. i'd recommend only buying from them if they're doing a sale, or if you literally have no other choice.

now regarding fruits mag - unfortunately, you can't buy from them. fruits mag is a japanese magazine that went over a variety of different street styles, so if you want to buy from fruits, you'd have to buy from the brands that the people in the magazines are wearing. as fruits was most popular in the 2000s, most of those brands are defunct...however, i do have some recommendations for japanese alternative brands!

alice and the pirates - popular lolita fashion. pretty good sizing i think, and they do worldwide shipping too iirc.

baby the stars shine bright - same as aatp, but more "cutesy".

acdc rag - yami kawaii type clothes with inclusive sizing.

dearmylove - jirai kei/dark girly clothing and beautiful shoes. inclusive sizing, i'm pretty sure they have a full plus size range! also collabed with needy streamer overdose lol

liz lisa - lolita/mori kei/girly styles and pretty coats. quite expensive tho...

moi-meme-moitie - the brand of malice mizer's guitarist mana-sama! gothic lolita. i'm not sure about sizing or prices.

6%dokidoki - yume kawaii and decora style. very colorful! i'm not sure about sizing.

angel blue - japanese kids clothing, usually worn in general kawaii and jojifuku styles. as it's for kids, the sizing is NOT inclusive at all, UK size S-M at the most from what i've seen. usually you can only find resellers on depop, but the pricing usually isn't horrible.

other than brands, i'd recommend looking for clothes thrifting on and offline (hit big city thrift stores for better chances of alt clothing), buying accessories from verified etsy sellers, and just looking around the house for anything you can turn into an accessory or part of an outfit! i hope this post helps you though!

[solarpunkani]

Milkweed Lovers Everywhere, Heed My Warning

By all means let me know if I'm wrong here, but if I'm not wrong then we're looking at a serious (at least to me) problem.

I've been trying to stray away from Tropical Milkweed (Asclepias curassavica) and towards more native species in my area--things like swamp, sandhill, etc--and Butterflyweed (Asclepias tuberosa) fits in that category for me. It's hard to find native milkweed plants in stores--even places I've gone to in the past that had a handful of native species are currently only selling Tropical Milkweed. Even still, I know that there's been a good bit of buzz around growing native species, and some stores I've visited have said they're trying to find vendors with native species--they're not only selling Tropical for lack of trying.

So imagine my surprise--and delight--when I go to Lowe's and see Asclepias tubersoa blazoned on a plant label!

And imagine my surprise when it's being sold right next to Tropical Milkweed and looks almost identical to it.

I was immediately suspicious--especially considering the red flower buds on the 'Butterfly weed'. I've grown Tropical Milkweed for several years, and while it's been awhile since I've seen a Butterfly Weed plant outside of a photograph, these definitely didn't look like what I'd seen. Not to mention, I'd only heard of Asclepias tuberosa flowering in orange or yellow--not red. Of course, at the same time, I'm not a professional botanist, and a quick google search did declare that butterfly weed can grow in red (though the images all look like asclepias curassavica to me...).

(Image from the Native Plant Database. Looking at this picture, I should've realized where this was going sooner...)

So I did the reasonable thing and bought two of them. I figured if the red buds somehow turned orange and were actually Butterfly Weed, then I'd be perfectly satisfied. If they turned out to be Tropical Milkweed, well, I simply would give them to my neighbor who's fond of them, or find something else to do with them.

(I feel the need to emphasize; there are a lot of people online who are in the 'if you plant tropical milkweed you're a horrible person and intentionally killing monarch butterflies' camp. I am not one of them; it's not invasive in my area of Florida, it just takes a little bit of extra managing in terms of cutting it back in October/November.)

I ended up in the same Lowe's again today, shopping for my mom, and took a peek at their plant selection. Lo and behold, I found the Butterfly Weed, and...

This sure does look like Tropical Milkweed to me, and to others in my gardening server, yet it's still labeled as 'Butterfly Weed.' Also, I didn't see any Tropical Milkweed on any of the shelves--at least, nothing labeled as Tropical Milkweed. Instead, all I saw was Tropical Milkweed disguised as Butterfly Weed.

This is, in my humble pollinator garden enthusiast opinion, a problem. At best, Lowe's--or the company they source their plants from--is mislabeling their plants on accident. Which could cause problems if people are buying the plants and putting them in a place that's not quite the right condition for them, or create severe disappointment if someone's excited to grow the native Asclepias tuberosa only to end up with something else entirely. At worst? Lowe's--or the company they source their plants from--are aware that people want to grow native milkweed and are either unable to or too lazy to grow them, and would rather try to get away with selling Tropical Milkweed--which has been growing increasingly controversial in some gardening circles--and still reap the benefits and profits of selling native milkweed species.

However, I'll be real? I'm not sure what exactly to do about it. So I guess I'm just letting everyone know; if you see 'Butterfly Weed (Asclepias tuberosa)' in your local Lowe's, at least double check. Otherwise, you may plant Tropical Milkweed/Scarlet Milkweed (Asclepias curassavica) instead.

[thezombieprostitute]

I recently saw a pair of ladies' underwear available online (I swear this is the most questionable way I've ever begun a message to someone, I swear I was just shopping) that had the text 'Achievement Unlocked' printed on the front, and that made me think of Jake & Tech Tuesdays. 😅 Just thought I'd share in case you were amused by it.

This is definitely going in the Jake & Sunshine Flashback Files.

Summary: Jake knows he's the luckiest man in the world and it's all because of you.

Warnings: Mild smut. Please let me know if I missed any!

Word Count: ~2.1k

A/N: Reader is female. No physical descriptors used.

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

Jake was nervous. More nervous than he'd ever been in his life. And he'd been shot at before! It was your first date and he really wanted things to go well. You were so beautiful, kind, funny, smart and he was just a dork who got by everyone that he talked too much. Well, everyone but you told him that. It was another reason he felt he really needed to make this date perfect. No one else treated him so well and he knew he had to treat you like the angel of mercy and light you were to him.

What he didn't know was that you were just as nervous. The cute IT guy who never dissuaded you from talking about your interests, even shared your interests, was taking you on a date! You knew you weren't likely to find someone else as sweet. Well, sweet for now. A part of you was kept in check, reminding you that upfront kindness and interest rarely lasted longer than a month or so. Still, Jake felt different than those other guys. You felt so safe around him, and that counts for a lot!

Jake hits the buzzer for your apartment right on time. He'd been standing there for at least 20 minutes but didn't want to hit the button too early or too late. When you confirm it's him you hit the button to let him up and do all the last second preparations you think you need to make. He knocks on the door and you open it to find him holding a bouquet of yarn skeins. Your hands fly to your mouth in surprise and you bounce on your toes with excitement. Jake breathes a sigh of relief at the evidence that it was the right move.

Your first date is a blur of laughter, friendly conversation, and even some snuggling. Being the gentleman that he is, Jake walks you to your building door and you both feel the sparks fly at your first kiss. You won't know it for a few more months but after you parted ways for the night, you both did an excited victory dance.

It's your second date and you're so much more giddy than nervous. You and Jake had been messaging each other so much at work you were scared HR was going to step in. And you continued to have your lunches together whenever you could. You marveled at the fact that Jake hadn't seemed to tire of you talking about your favorite shows and movies.

Jake was equally happy that he could talk to you about his favorite things. He could jabber on and on and you would never scoff at him, derisively call him a nerd, ask him who cares about these things. And you would counter with your own good points and perspectives. He swears your conversations are the highlight of his days.

In fact, your second date was just an extended version of your lunch dates, but neither of you seemed to mind. You were both so comfortable and enjoying the time together. There was significantly more snuggling and you didn't wait for Jake to walk you to your door before you started kissing him. Jake was internally struggling to keep himself in check. Desperately wanting to make you happy, overjoyed at the affection, and trying to pay attention to your signals so he wouldn't overstep.

You wanted to bring Jake up to your apartment but you also didn't want to move too fast. He was so sweet, smart and strong and you didn't want to ruin it. Gently pushing his chest, he gets the hint and lets up. You thank him for a wonderful night and kiss the tip of his nose before giggling and asking him for a third date. Any fear you had that he'd be disappointed was gone the second his smile grew and his eyes lit up.

The work week before your third date was grueling. You were both so eager for the weekend, for unfettered access to each other, it made the work days go by so much slower. The two of you spent your lunches practically cuddling as you ate, exchanging little kisses. You'd been told that, so long as your work wasn't affected, HR would not step in. Though you're pretty sure you've seen some coworkers roll their eyes at you.

You try not to take it to heart when one or two of them give you a "friendly warning" about him losing interest after he gets sex. Jake's already so delightfully different from other guys you dated. He actually listened to you about your likes and dislikes. He didn't get you flowers, he got you yarn! He didn't order for you at restaurants. He didn't do backhanded compliments. He felt so genuine.

In fact, you felt so confident about Jake that, during your lunch, you asked him if he'd be willing to change up the plans for that weekend's date.

"What did you have in mind?" he stammers, hoping the last minute change isn't a bad sign.

"I was thinking," you hesitate a little. "I was thinking you could come over to my place and...and I'll cook? And we can watch movies together?" Heat rushes to your face as you start second guessing yourself.

Jake takes your hand, "that sounds awesome! Is there anything you want me to bring? Do you want me to help cook? I'm not much of a cook, but I can definitely clean up! Oh, and would you like me to bring some of my DVDs? We can compare libraries if you'd like."

You giggle, feeling a lot better than you did a few seconds ago. "Well, you said you have the Collector's Edition Highlander?"

He beams, "I'll happily bring it!"

As soon as he gets to his desk, Jake immediately calls up his friend, Cougar, for advice. He explains the conversation and Cougar just chuckles and says, "relax. Take a deep breath and be yourself. She's clearly into it."

"Thanks for that," Jake sarcastically replies.

"You're welcome," Cougar replies before hanging up.

Jake arrives with the promised DVD and, in lieu of a bouquet, he hands you a floral Lego set that has you bouncing on your toes in delight. As you let Jake inside he takes a deep breath and his mouth is immediately watering at the delicious smells from the kitchen. His cheeks turn pink as you both hear the grumbling from his stomach.

"Please tell me you've eaten today," you say, a little giggle in your voice.

"I...I'm pretty sure I did," he replies, his hand running through his hair as his cheeks redden. "I know I ate breakfast, I can promise that much." In truth he'd spent so much of the day nervous about the date he'd done everything except eat.

"You need to take better care of yourself," you gently chide with a kiss to his cheek. "I hope you don't mind that it's only spaghetti and garlic bread."

"'Only'? That sounds divine! And not just because I'm hungry."

"I'm glad to hear it," you confess. "I just need to dish it up and then we can eat. You can go ahead and sit."

Jake goes to the table, "which chair is yours?" You give him a confused look so he continues, "I mean, I'm a guest. I don't want to take your favorite spot. If you prefer this chair or that, I'll take the other one."

You smile in understanding and direct him to the chair that's further from the kitchen.

You bring out the plates and can't help but giggle at how he looks like such an eager puppy. The two of you talk, conversation flowing easily. Though you've only known each other a few months, it really feels like you've been together forever. There's a feeling of safety in each other's presence that makes you want to be together for the rest of forever.

When the meal is over you suggest it's time to start the movie, but as it starts up, neither of you is really paying much attention. Instead your both very aware of each other's presence. Jake had trouble keeping his breathing steady as you snuggled up to him. You had to fight to keep your hands in your lap, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. Instead you opt to lay your head on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around your shoulders.

That's when you decide to try to be a bit bold.

You move one of your hands to Jake's leg and gauge his reaction. You think you hear his breath hitch but he doesn't protest. You start slowly, gently rubbing your hand along the leg of his jeans and his breathing definitely quickens.

"I can stop if you'd like me to," you rasp. You'd been so focused on Jake's breathing you hadn't realized how much your own had quickened.

Jake's brain is in panic mode. He wants you to never stop touching him, but he doesn't want you to feel like you have to. Then again, you're offering to keep going, you started this of your own volition. "Please don't stop," he finally croaks out.

"Would...would you like me to touch more than just your leg?" The groan Jake lets out makes you feel like his brain has just short circuited and needs a restart. "I mean, we don't have to. Especially if you're not comfortable with it." You remove your hand from his leg. "I never want you to be uncomfortable. I'm so sorry if I--".

You're cut off by Jake grabbing both sides of your face and bringing you in for a deep kiss. Your body moves mostly on instinct as you move to straddle him, and he moans into your mouth as you settle over his hard-on. You gently roll your hips and he whimpers, making the corners of your mouth turn up into a smile. You pull away from him and giggle as his lips follow yours.

"Not...not to be...too forward," you gasp, "but would...would you like to um, to...the bedroom?"

Jake looks into your eyes and sees how hopeful yet scared you are. He wants nothing more than to live up to that hope. He's so scared he's going to disappoint you. That it'll be a deal-breaker for you if he's not good enough in bed. In truth, disappointing you feels like it would break him. At the same time, if he doesn't take you up on your offer, you'll be disappointed as well. He ends up nodding his heading, not trusting himself to speak.

"Are you sure, Jakey? I need you to tell me 'yes'."

"Yes, oh dear lord, yes. I want you so badly that I'm scared I'll disappoint you. Please, yes, I've wanted this for so long--"

He's cut off by your finger moving over his lips in a shushing fashion as you giggle. "You don't have to prove anything," you promise. You get off of his lap and hold out your hand for him. He accepts, kissing the back of your hand, then up your arm, then along your collarbone, making you giggle again.

You lead him to your bedroom and sit on the bed before pulling him over you. He's very careful not to crush you but when you wrap your legs around his hips and pull him in close he loses a little control. You moan as you feel more of his weight on you and he lets his hands roam everywhere he can get them.

As clothes start to come off you marvel at how muscular Jake really is. You'd known he was strong but seeing it was something else. You trace your fingers along some of his tattoos as he works over your breasts. He's fondling, pinching, licking, nipping and you swear you're going to lose your mind from how good it feels. You start moaning his name and Jake swears he's in heaven.

"Jake," you coo, making him stop everything so he can listen to you. "Wanna feel you inside me, please?"

"You're too good to me, Sunshine," he rasps.

He starts pulling off your pants but stops when he sees your panties. They have the Xbox Achievement Unlocked icon. Jake looks at you and give him a sly smile and a wink.

"I...I may have planned for this," you confess, heat rushing to your face. "I just...wanted to be prepared."

Jake laughs and kisses you all over, feeling a renewed sense of calm. A sense that he was going to be okay. That you were his safe space.

-------

He saw those panties again a few years later on your wedding night.

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory;

@late-to-the-party-81; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly

[pearl-kite]

So I came to the realization today that I am not going to get anymore work on this trunk done this year. I still need to finish stripping the paper inside and redoing that, but it's just. Not happening until spring. With that realization, I decided it's time to finally bring it back inside, put all the junk on my floor that used to be in it back in it, and guys

It looks good.

This is going to be a summary post of the project, so let's go back and remember what I started with. Back in, like, 2015 or something, I bought this dome-top steamer trunk at a missionary shop for $65

Yeah. Rough. But underneath that paint it was sturdy, and the only thing missing was the lock and the right-side hasp. While I lived overseas this sat in my parents' house, and when I got back I kept meaning to do something while storing all of my yarn and cat food in it. When I finally got my own space (almost a year ago now!) with my own garage, I finally decided: it was time.

Heads up, this is a long post under the cut.

Did a lot of research online, grew to hate how generative AI has even permeated niche topics like how to refinish a vintage steamer trunk, WHY is there generative AI for that, PLEASE stop, went to Lowe's and bought some supplies (I used Citristrip for the paint stripping, it worked VERY easily), and started stripping that hideous brown* away.

Almost instantly I could tell how good it could be. The tin looked amazing, and for most of the stripping process I wondered why on earth someone would cover it with any color. It took multiple layers of stripping, and I got better at it over time.

I did also start to see some oxidation issues with the tin that made the purpose behind the paint job a little more understandable.

One side was particularly bad, but I will never forgive the decision to paint the entire thing one single color.

At first, the flat metal seemed okay, but the longer I worked on stripping, the longer it was exposed to air, the rustier it started to get. I had already planned on coating it, and I ended up getting some Rust-Oleum Rust Reformer spray paint. Instead of removing the rust, it bonds to the oxide and stops the process from continuing. It also happens to leave it a nice matte black that didn't need additional painting. I taped everything off, then sprayed.

Then it was time for the tin. I looked for ideas, and the best one I found was Rub'n'Buff. It's not so much a paint as a pigmented wax, with the idea that you can buff it to a higher shine. As I was stripping paint, I found a spot under one of the slats that the painter missed, and the original tin had been painted a gold color, so I used that to decide on color. I decided on Grecian gold, though I used the antique gold as a kind of base to make sure the Grecian stretched far enough.

I originally started applying it with some craft foam brushes, but they didn't really want to work for me, so I ended up buying a pack of makeup sponges, the little disposable wedge ones, and the finer texture worked much better. I had to trim them down pretty frequently, because the wax would build up and stop applying as nicely, but there were more than enough in the pack to finish the job.

The coverage is amazing for this stuff. This side was the worst of them, and one layer of the stuff was almost perfect. The Grecian gold was almost a bit runnier, though, and ended up needing a second layer to cover some patches that were almost too thin, thus the other underneath.

This tin is so pretty though. I still kind of regret that it needed it; the places that weren't oxidized were so bright in a way that the Rub'n'Buff had no hope of emulating. There are some places you can still buy the embossed tin for rehabing trunks like this, but I haven't found one with a pattern quite like this, and this one is so much nicer than the ones I've seen. I'm very glad that it was all intact except for where the lock goes.

After the tin came the slats. I knew from sites like Brettun's Village that I wanted to use tung oil, so I had bought what I thought was tung oil. Turns out Minwax gets to call their tung oil finish that even though there's. No... tung oil. in it. ? So uh, if you want actual tung oil, do NOT listen to Minwax, they're lying, I don't understand why it's allowed. It still looks nice enough, but quite annoying.

Speaking of Brettun's Village, they not only do their own restorations AND provide a guide, they have a very extensive supply of recently furbished and original parts. They happened to have a nearly identical hasp to the one that was missing (so nearly identical I only noticed after my dad pointed it out) and an old lock also similar to my original, made in the late 1800s/early 1900s.

The next step was to tackle the inside. Instead of just adding more paper on top (like the last people did, so now there are two layers, one of which hides some original stickers ;3;), I decided to try to scrape that out, and I've found some structural issues that the metal and slats outside have held together and kept hidden.

The top split in the wood is an actual crack on the front that needs fixing. The middle split is just the gap between the planks. The bottom is also a crack, but not as extensive as the top one.

So the final steps, when I get the motivation again come spring, is to finish getting as much of the paper off as I can. Then my dad is going to help me use some bondo to hold the cracks, and I'll find a removable wallpaper I like. Then I can sort out what I'm going to do with the lock. That top split runs right through where the lock should go - you can see some of the wood filler we already put in from where the original was ripped out - so we can't try to put anything there or it'll crack worse.

But I brought it in today!

It looks so good, I glance over and get to feel so satisfied; I did that.

*I don't like to call any color hideous, because a lot of the time it really depends on the context, and it's an okay brown. But for THIS? It was probably the worst brown they could have picked. Mixed with the orange of the paint stripper it looked like I was scraping diarrhea.

[alter-ego-xxx]

What lingerie do you think reg would wear. (I mean like are there any sets from Pinterest/online or something that you think he would buy?) what colors, patterns, styles and

how does he choose? Based on how easily James or Barty could yank the strap of his panties back to pull him on their dicks?

slightly nsfw (+ pictures of lingerie)

hm, okay, VERY GOOD question, I've been thinking about this for quite a while and also did my research, as i said. I came to the following conclusions. I think generally, there are two types of lingerie reg wears. On one side he's got one or two kinky, black, leather sets, which are used mostly for playtime. Then on the other hand, there are the elegant, almost feminine sets, and his choice in these is much more interesting. I think reg opts for colours that complement his milky white skin. Namely lavender, baby blue, dark red, saphire, and black. I think most of them are see through and with different floral patterns and bows on them, that make him feel extra pretty. I'm also a firm believer of the fact that his lingerie is mostly two pieced (meaning with a little bralette), because that way, his partner can feel like hes unwraping him like a sweet, teeth rotting candy.

He mostly just choses what brings out his (dare I say almost delicate?) figure the most. At least half of the sets are also gifts from his partner, or things they bought together, since they both should have a wonderful time when they get to the moment of truth.

Usually after a good night, there is definitely the need to buy a new set, because the old one didn't withstand his partners want and eagerness. So at one point, Reg discovers that there are panties with little ribbons over the hipbones, which can be opened for easy access. This doesn't stop most of them from ripping (because who wouldn't go insane with the wonderful view of Regulus Black in lingerie in their bed??), but Reg is happy enough to take his partner to the shop and get them to pay for him feeling pretty.

But Regulus also knows that he can't wear the sets if he's in the mood but the time is limited, because from the second his partner catches a glance of the lingerie, it goes on for literal hours while they fuck like animals for hours and hours on end.

His lingerie is soo fucking beautiful and sexy but also very expensive (because he wears only the best of the best) and at the end of the day very time consuming.

I'll add some pictures I found on Pinterest that made me think of Reg:

this was such a fun ask. Thank you so much, nonie, I hope I did you justice, if not, dont be afraid to specify what you wanted to hear! I might make a part two with how i think barty and james would react differently.. if anyone has thoughts on that, feel free to share them with me. I'd be very interested to hear y'alls opinion!

[darlingillustrations]

I feel like I should be panicking more. My rent is due in one week, my landlord isn't friendly, and I have no one to ask for help. And yet? I have an eerie sense of calm about it.

I know the calm that happens when you are not actually calm but panicking and your body is helping you survive. This isn't that kind of fake calm. I am sleeping at night. I'm not snaping at my kids. I am *at peace.*

(Read more for musings about the economy, my spiritual mindset in the midst of it all, and some Mary Oliver poetry.)

Five years ago? I would be panicking and staying up late working long hours and burning myself out. But now? These days I'm working full days, then stepping back and cooking meals or working on projects for my kids. It feels more stable this time. I feel like I've matured.

I got a report in my email yesterday which showed that retail sales in January plunged 0.8% from December, far worse than the consensus forecast for a decline of just 0.2%, and the largest monthly loss since March 2023. On the one hand, it made me feel better that it's not just me. On the other hand, it sucks that lots of other people are struggling, as well.

Still, I make the time to meditate every morning. Still, I pull out my poetry books and take my life advice from Mary Oliver. In the poem One or Two Things she wrote:

One or two things are all you need to travel over the blue pond, over the deep roughage of trees and through the stiff flowers of lightning--some deep memory of pleasure, some cutting knowledge of pain.

You don't need to have all the answers. You just need to put one step in front of the other.

Last year when I launched my wholesale business, I drummed up over 1000 leads. I'd pick a city and use google maps or yelp to search for gift shops, stationary stores, coffee shops... anywhere that I thought might want my work... and I took the time to write a personal note to each and every one of these businesses. This month I decided to check back in with them again, and so many of the businesses are now closed or their email addresses no longer work.

Having exhausted these leads, I sat at my computer yesterday with the knowledge that I needed to wait on people to get back to me, that the wholesale leads were out of my hands. And that I still did not have money to pay my landlord. Not once did I fear I would join the list of closed businesses. I did not despair.

Instead, I turned to my first joy. I went back to the sales history on my website and found my very first customers from back in 2016 when I launched my web shop. I emailed them, each of those first customers, sending personal emails. I did not ask them to buy anything. That wasn't what I needed. I asked how they were, what they have been up to, where their lives have taken them.

I was searching for that deep memory of pleasure, that cutting knowledge of pain. One or two things is all we need, after all.

And I got one email back.

This woman was the first person to ever buy an art print in my online shop--a honeybee boy painting--and it is still hanging in her stepson's room, nearly 8 years later. She shared pictures of her new baby, and I shared the pictures with my kids. This woman had sent me many emails over the years, asking for life advice or encouraging me on a hard day. She shared that she didn't realize her emails had made such an impact on me.

Funny how none of us truly sees how impactful we are to those around us. Funny how life keeps going on, whether we worry about it or not.

In One or Two Things, Mary Oliver also wrote:

For years and years I struggled just to love my life. And then the butterfly rose, weightless, in the wind. "Don't love your life too much," it said, and vanished into the world.

I want my character to be defined not by what I do when things are easy but by how I carry myself when things are hard. And I do believe things happen for a reason. Maybe the line between delusion and faith is very thin, but the universe has shown me time and again that it's had my back. I've been in worse scrapes and still came out ok.

If you've read this far and you want to help me get through the next week, you can buy something from my shop or support me on Patreon.

And if you've read this far but you are in a similar boat, don't fret. We will find our way through the fires. one. step. at. a. time.

[homosexuhauls]

I haven't seen anyone mention it on here, most likely because English language news sources are reporting them as friends, but a man murdered a lesbian couple in Hong Kong last week.

(Twitter thread includes more sources and proof of the two victims being in a relationship. However, video of the attack exists online and some of the photos in Chinese news articles are graphic/disturbing. Please proceed with caution.)

Fang Xiaotong (26 years old) and Liu Jixi (22 years old) were stabbed to death by a 39 year old man in a targeted attack in a shopping mall. Allegedly, he purchased the knife only after seeing the visibly gay couple, then attacked Fang Xiaotong, who was a Tom, which has a similar meaning to a butch or stud or masc lesbian. Liu Jixi attempted to intervene to save her girlfriend, but the perpetrator stabbed her also. Bystanders and mall security did not intervene, although eventually chefs who worked at the mall heard screams and armed themselves with stools before attempting to stop the attacker. The perpetrator then waited calmly for the police, and both women were pronounced dead at the hospital. While Western sources are painting this as a result of mental illness, the video and local news stories make it clear that this was likely a hate crime.

(Nb. I've also seen their names given as Fong Hiu-tung and Lau Kai-hei, and also that they may have used the nicknames "Daniel" and "Amber". I can't know which names they would have preferred to be used, hence why I'm including all of them here but using Fang Xiaotong and Liu Jixi throughout the post for consistency and clarity.)

From Naomi Wu, whose twitter thread I've linked above, an explanation of the sometimes deadly hostilities Toms and other lesbians face in China and Hong Kong:

When men attack Toms (butches), they think a lot of things- sometimes in Chinese we say "one lesbian steals two men's wives"- herself and her partner. And for bitter middle-aged, unmarried men like this attacker, they've been told their whole life they are owed a wife to wait on them hand and foot- and they feel robbed and wronged by a young handsome Tom taking what's "theirs". They are angry, entitled, jealous- they want to teach her a lesson. They want to punish her for having what is rightfully theirs when they don't. Then it's "Oh, if you want to act like a man, I'll treat you like one". Most need to justify it to themselves to get started. Of course, the femme/Dee/P is always next, because we will fight to save our Tom, and once we do, they can justify turning their violence on us next. In their twisted head, they decide their unprovoked attack was "fighting 1-on-1" and it's our fault for getting involved. All Toms know the deal, they cannot win, all Toms tell their girls again and again "if something happens, just run, I can take it". When the time comes, all Toms try to buy their girl time to get away- even as they go down under fists and boots...or knives They want to buy us time, but no femmes can bear to leave them, so it never works. But they always go for our Toms first, then us. Every time.

Fang Xiaotong was a waiter in a high-end restaurant. She loved small animals and children and had lived with her mother and step-sister prior to moving in with Liu Jixi one to two months before the attack. Liu Jixi was a hair stylist and also worked part-time at a bar, which is apparently where she and Fang Xiaotong met. On the day of the attack, both women were planning to meet up with Fang Xiaotong's family to celebrate her grandfather's birthday.

Rest in peace 🫶 your courage will not be forgotten.

[botanylobotomy]

Spirit Shops Red Flags

Welcome to the list of Spirit shops Red/Yellow/Green flags post. These posts were Co-written with Katsper, and was also added to with the help of those in the Summoner’s Review server. General list was written with Katsper and expanded points are ones that people shared in TSR. Yellow & Green flags post to come

Please not that due to length some has been put under read more

closed religion species (up to personal values on what is closed or not)

There is a lot of religions and cultures that are closed. Spirits that come from them isn’t meant for people that aren’t of that culture or religious practice. Granted anybody can say “Oh I’m in xyz culture or religion” but it’s just uncomfortable to deal with. And a lot are really unsafe for those not in the religion or culture. Golems for example are of Jewish Culture, there is a whole process of making them and they are very specific to that process. Personally I wouldn't trust somebody selling them because from my personal understanding they are very complex and the one who makes them goes through a very heavy learning process. It’s uncomfortable. Adding, native American spirits are also big for people to sell, lets not do that for MANY reasons.

Straight up dangerous spirits (such as Native american w**s or skinwalkers)

“Spirit xyz can and will kill any human they can so they need a powerful keeper to keep them under control”, why are they thinking this is a good idea? Why are they selling Native american spirits or spirits that just want to destroy whatever they can and kill others. Serious lapse in judgment and a way to get other keepers harmed. Or even non practicing relatives.

over sexualizing spirits

Over sexualized spirits brings the feeling that sex is the only thing that matters and that’s all they are good for. Listings that say that spirit just wants to have sex devalues them as a being that has it’s own feelings, history, or really anything. They basically are advertised as breathing blow up dolls you put no care into.

selling ubis as sex fiends 

Not all Ubis (plural for for succubi and incubi, as well as a gender neutral term for those that don't identify as strictly male or strictly female) are actually interested in sex. It can be seen as a necessity for some, but there's also ones that want the emotional bond before getting down and dirty. It's a really heavy handed misconception.

selling "orphans" or children spirits

Now this was a big no no back when I started getting into online spirit work. Children spirits should be with their parents or adults of their species. If they’re selling orphans means they made no leg work to connect them with an adult spirit of their species so generally left with questions. Think of it like somebody selling you an orphan human child on the black market. Sketchy as fuck and feels super illegal {which it is}, there’s sometimes ulterior motives there that just leave the whole situation feeling wrong. And some species have strict as hell rules about their children and you don’t want to get into the cross hairs of that.

short CC or RC turnaround time (within a month or so) 

So this is more about having just conjured a spirit for your custom conjure (cc) or reverse conjure (rc). It's not giving you much detail or assurance that spirit is actually safe or says who they say they are. It also feels like “meh, did the work of conjuring good fing-ing luck. Give me my money I've waited long enough.” 

short vetting times

Short vetting times can be seen as super dangerous because it means they are just catching or conjuring spirits to sell for profit and not for care. Always ask about their vetting times and if vetting times are in physical or astral. Some astral spaces time moves differently so astral time of vetting could be shorter or longer compared to those who vet just in physical, it’s important to know their vetting times. Longer doesn’t always mean better, but it should give you an idea of how much they should know about the spirit

very little information about the spirit

This makes it feel like the conjurer didn't actually do vetting or did the shortest amount of vetting possible. They got some random details or bare minimum and said it was good enough. To a lot it feels like there is no care about the spirit and again, more interested in the money than actually connecting a spirit with a human keeper

misinformation about the spirit

Imagine you just got a spirit and the conjurer tells you it's a dragon but you learn from the spirit Is actually a hellhound. If you go to the conjurer and ask wtf is up and they ignore you? Chances are they don't actually care. Or they gave you the wrong info for that spirit. It's really frustrating to learn and so that's why you should always double check with your spirits and address things with the conjurer. but it leaves seeds of distrust and people talk.

"This spirit or item will solve all of your problems!" mentality

This can be dangerous to people as they then have the mentality that they don’t have to do anything for themselves if they can just buy a spirit or item because they were told that it can fix things for them. It can also be super harmful for those that struggle with mental health because they don't take the steps to help themselves and rely on spirits or items to help instead. It leaves spirits themselves in a difficult position especially if they can't do what they're being advertised to help/cure/fix what the conjurer is saying they can do

Doing "forever" bindings, or something similar

If a spirit wants to follow you after death into the next life, they will... don't make them. Forcing them to stay bound no matter what life takes away their right to choose and be free. It’s slavery in a way.

Has very little information about the spirit to offer, a paragraph or less

This ties into the vetting red flag. It shows they took little to no effort to getting to know the spirit and let you know that they actually took the time and care to get to know the spirit before matching them with a keeper. It shows they care more about the money not the spirit or the people they are matching them with

selling a "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" spirit

This feels icky just for the fact it feels like a spirit is forced into that kind of situation. Like a hostage and kidnapper feeling

Really Really high pricing, especially for very little information

According to others in TSR, if the pricing is really high and you get a page or less of information, they’re more interested in their pocketbooks than they are actually connecting spirits with keepers.

They don't allow any visits with spirits before adoption, seeing how certain energies and personalities fit in your family is important. 

This is becoming a lot more popular, especially if shops have discords. The general consensus from this is that a lot of shops do not allow refunds or returns after buying a spirit’s binding. So you’ve bought a spirit, turns out they just do not vibe with your energy, or they don’t get along with other companions. Now you’re just stuck. Visiting a spirit allows you to see if you actually vibe well together or if they can get along with your current family. General idea is that you should visit a few times to be sure that the vibes and energies all mix well.

making up species that diverges from canon, especially with closed religions

“Canon” being the core myth of the species. Take leviathans for example {new example because Native american spirits been pointed out a lot}, they are world enders. They want to destroy the world and consume it. Somebody selling a leviathan that’s friendly, wants to be buddies, isn’t a thing. Or taking a closed culture/religion species and just completely erasing their ties for sellability.

Human spirits in general 

It gives buying and selling humans for a lot of people. Which is weird considering the humanoid spirits, but the outright from earth humans feels… wrong???

Haunted dolls in general 

This is generally seen as buying human spirits and selling them. A lot tend to be children as well for a ridiculous amount of money. And they are traded and sold a lot which makes things uncomfortable. Mixing it with the severe lack of any vetting, feeling that the spirit is trapped in the haunted doll, and it feeling like selling/trading children it feels wrong.

uses language like "caught" or "captured" a spirit

This makes it seem like the spirit was completely unwilling for companionship and basically taken against their will and sold. Like slavery.

Offers "black magic" spells or "essence" spells 

Black magic is a racist term. Please google on how it's considered racist. In this day and age we should be more alerted to the fact that a lot of core practices were built in a way to suppress BIPOC individuals and their cultures and practices. Be better. Essence spells also feels weird.

A spell that affects you physically, such as giving you fighting knowledge when you had none before or making your teeth sharper

For a lot of people this feels more fake and more giving the hollywood glow to the witchy or spirit work community. It gives false expectations of what doing spell work is like. In return you get people that are pissed that they paid

[graciegoeskrazy]

Last Resort

Sebastian Stan x Teen!reader

Warnings

HEAVY talks of Self-harm, mentions of mental hospitals/psych wards, reader has 2 moms (if that bothers you then just unfollow me), New York City lol, some language, not entirely proofread

Word Count

~2k

A/N

Can you tell I got really lazy at the end? Lol. Sorry for being mia again. Also send me all your fic recs. I’m a update the list soon. Semi proud of this one. Xoxo.

To put it lightly, it had been a rough couple of months, but the long awaited spring break had finally arrived. Your parents didn't tell you where you were going. You only assumed it was some nice dinner or lunch or a fun activity they had planned to kick off your week off. Going on weekend trips to the city wasn’t unusual. You lived not even an hour away, and your online schooling routine gave you and your family the flexibility needed to do fun things like this. This weekend, however, felt…different.

Before you and your parents left, you caught them putting one of your small duffel bags into the back of the car. You didn't think much about it. It wasn't until they pulled into an unfamiliar parking garage once you got into the city, that you started to ask questions.

“So, where exactly are we going?”

“It's a surprise.” Your mom said. A hint of mischief in her voice.

“I thought we were just gonna get something to eat?” You continued.

“We are technically. Well…you are.” Your other mom gave her a light smack on the arm as she drove through the building trying to find a parking spot.

“Don’t spoil it too much!”

They both stopped talking and sat in silence, placing mental bets on how much longer it would be until you started talking again. You shot another glance to the back of the car, then continued. “What’s with the duffel bag?”

Your moms exchanged gitty glances, having a silent conversation with their eyes, debating whether or not to explain more, or just let you see for yourself. They landed on the latter. You sat back abruptly in your seat, arms crossed, pondering what your mothers could possibly have in store.

The car finally pulled into a spot, and the car unclicked. As you got out and stretched your legs you caught a peak of your mom getting out the driver seat and heading to the back out the car. She pulled out the duffel bag and kept walking past you to the elevator. Your mothers paused, exchanged glances at each other's phones which seemed like some sort of text, then continued walking, signaling for you to follow them.

What in the world was happening?

…

The cool New York City air greeted you as you stepped foot on the pavement. Although it was spring and people were dressed like it was the hottest day of summer, there was still a chill in the air.

Your parents turned various corners and ended with you right behind. Ou asked a couple questions here and there, along with some not-so-educated guess…

“Is it…the zoo?”

“Is it a Broadway show?

“Are we seeing the Jonas Brothers in concert?!?!”

“Is it the Disney store? I think I deserve a shopping spree after all I've been through.”

You gave up eventually. With the unhidable smirks your parents kept giving as they walked in front of you, you could tell you were getting nowhere. One of your moms kept checking her phone every 2 seconds, so you felt as if you all were about to reach your destination. She grabbed your arms gently and led you forward so you were now walking in toe with them.

“You know we both love you more than anything in this world right?”

What the fuck is about to happen?!

You kept you cool and just nodded.

“And you know all we want to do is help. Right?”

Your first instinct was that they were about to send you to another mental hospital. You silently hoped and prayed that was not it. You already spent some time there and it was (simply yet accurately put) the deepest darkest hell you have ever experienced. It made some sense with the duffel bag, but still did not entirely add up. You just sent another nod her way.

She smiled and looked forward again. “We hope you have the best time. You will call us if you need anything at all. Understood?”

You quirked your head in confusion as all your steps slowed. “Okay. I need some serious context right now. What the hell do you mean?”

A new voice spoke up. “She means, you're coming with me.”

You whipped your head around and were relieved and equally confused to see a familiar face you adored so much.

“Sebastian!”

You and Sebastian had met when you were 7. You were working on a film together and since then have become inseparable, working on 2 other projects, seeing each other frequently, and practically trusting each other with your lives.

You both smiled as you hugged and greeted each other. “What the hell are you doing here?! What do you mean I'm coming with you?”

“One sec my love.” He said. He turned past you and greeted your parents. Your mom gave him the duffel bag while talking in hushed whispers. You couldn’t make out anything they were saying, but it didn't matter, you were too busy standing in shock from what was happening to try and figure out what was happening.

Your moms voice brought you back to the present. “We love you sweetie! We’ll see you later.”

Sebastian walked back towards you. “You ready?”

“Okay are you gonna be the one to tell me what’s happening?”

He sighed, “You need a break. So, I’m giving you one.”

Still vague.

“Okay? So where are we going?’

“First, grab a quick snack. Then, the park, and then after, my place.”

…

Your day was filled with scenic walks around NYC, delicious sweets provided by Sebastian, and it all led you to now. This duffel bag your parents brought was filled with some clothes and bathroom stuff for an overnight stay or 2. After getting showered in changed back at Sebastian’s apartment, you walked out of the bathroom to find Sebastian pumping up and air mattress for you to sleep on.

“You know I’ll just end up sleeping on the couch right?”

“Nope, I get the couch and you get the air mattress.”

“Hmm. In that case I’ll just take your bed.”

“Very funny. What happened to our movie night? I though you were gonna force me to watch the latest Spider-Man movie?”

“Yeah okay fine.”

You sat on the couch as Sebastian continued to set up the mattress, finishing it with pillows and blankets.

“Okay, I’m still confused. Why did my parents bribe you to hang out with me?”

He chuckled, “They didn’t bribe me, y/n. No one needs to bribe me to hang out with my favorite person.”

You smiled. “Okay, but why now? I still feel like I'm missing something.”

He put the air mattress pump down and sat across from you on the sofa.”

“Your parents and I are just worried, that’s all.”

You pondered his response for a moment. “Worried about what?”

He sighed, “About you.”

He knows

You let out a small fake chuckle. “Why on Earth would you need to-”

“Your parents told me what happened.”

All the color drained from your face. Sebastian must have noticed. He placed a comforting hand on your knee. He knew you kept a lot of things private. Although he knew of some things you were going though, now and in the past, he still knew you were a secretive person, you liked to handle things on your own. He knew it was hard for you to talk about things like this and also knew you definitely didn't want him to know about your most recent struggles, but your parents were desperate in getting you to open up, and Sebastian seemed like the safest bet.

“I- W-what are you-”

“Don't play dumb, y/n.”

The pain and worry seemed to turn to anger. You stood up and went to the kitchen to refill your drink. “I’m fine, Sebastian.”

“Trying to kill yourself doesn’t sound fine to me.”

“Shut up will you!”

“Tell me what happened.”

“I-“

“Go slow. Take your time. I’m here, and I’ve got all night.” He said that last part in an attempt to make you laugh, but it didn’t seem to work.

“A couple months ago…I don’t know, I was really tired. I was still in real school, the bullying was nonstop, everyone made fun of me for the stupidest things. I know I I better than what they said, or the stupid things they called me, but it still ge5s to you, you know? My grades were dropping as a result, I was being treated like shit at work with these terrible directors, and I just reached my breaking point.”

You looked at Sebastian, eyes asking for permission to go on. He nodded, pulling you in closer to him.

“I rarely told my parents about anything. They knew something was wrong, but they never would have suspected it got this bad. One night..I found a bottle of some old prescription pills that used to belong to my mom. I locked my self in the bathroom and just…”

The tears fell faster. You didn’t move. Sebastian just held you as you cried into him. His chin resting on your head. After a moment of catching your breath, you tried to continue.

“I spent a little more than a week in a mental hospital. It was like…pure hell. I never want to go back. And I know it all sounds dumb. I’m lucky, I went to a good school, I was working on a movie for christ's sake, I probably should’ve just sucked it up. I know it probably It sound like I’m a stupid spoiled brat-“

Sebastian grabbed your face genially in his hands “Hey! None of that. You do not need to apologize for what you did. You were struggling and weren’t in a good place. You do not have to apologize for that, you understand me?” You nodded. “All that matters now is that your here now, you're safe, you’re better, and you will get even better, okay? You’ve reached the bottom my love, but you made it out, and now there is nowhere to go but up.” You fell into him again. “And you’re not alone. You have your amazing moms, some of your friends, I beg there is people at work who care about you, and you have me, and you can’t get rid of me that easily, ok?”

“I just wish all of this was over. I wish I was fine, I wish I was normal. I hate feeling this way. This all just happened so fast. I miss myself, I miss being normal.”

“You will feel better again. And what even is normal? Normal is so boring. My love, you were never normal. You were this beautiful, intelligent, superstar young woman, leading a nowhere near normal life. The last thing I would want for you is for you to be normal.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“All you need to do now is focus on getting better, and know I will be there every single step of the way.”

[velkynkarma]

The book you binded looks so cool!!! I've been meaning to get into book binding as well, especially for One Piece fics and I love the format you did it in with Zoro's logo. How did you edit it? Would you be willing to share tips on how you did it? Did you watch book binding YouTube videos?

Thanks, anon! I'm glad you enjoyed! And I'm absolutely willing to share what I learned!

For the general book-binding, I used a couple book binding how-to videos.

Turning Fanfiction Into the Hardcover Book it Deserves by Jess Less

This one helped with:

How to use an old book cover/used book for the cover of the fanfic (you can also MAKE covers, and she has another video on this as well, but I love the idea of recycling old unwanted books into something new and loved)

The basics for formatting the pages (her bit about adding a compass design for the chapters is what inspired me to use Zoro's flag logo)

How to print and prep the pages/signatures

How to finish putting the whole thing together and add some interesting design elements

I especially liked this video because it's very beginner-friendly and casual, which helped the whole project feel a little less daunting. You can get special tools for book binding (there are kits online) but as shown, it's also simple enough to do with a thumbtack and some corkboard if you're low on cash.

That said, I found the stitch in this video a bit confusing, so I used the stitch from this video instead:

Folding & Sewing - Rounded and Backed Cased Book // Adventures in Bookbinding by DAS Bookbinding

Stitch prep is specifically around 7min in if you just want to skip to that. But the whole thing is an interesting watch too. This is more professional bookbinding and he has a lot of other interesting videos if you want to do some more complex things. However I found this stitch to be very straightforward and easy to follow and assemble, so I ultimately used this one when I put together Seven Deaths.

As for my personal tips and things I learned while doing this project?

Turns out Google Docs is kind of useless for this. You'll want actual word processing software like Microsoft Word. If you don't have the cash to spend on Microsoft's ridiculous subscription policy, you can use LibreOffice which is free (I did, and it works very well).

Fics are way longer on paper than they are digitally. Seven Deaths is 'only' about a 50K fic (less, in fact). But it still makes a 200+ page book. Pic a smaller fic to start with while you figure out everything you want to do.

Do some research on good book fonts for the body of your text. You can get crazy with other things (chapter headers or title pages) but pic something recommended for your text body so it's legible.

To add character symbols (like Zoro's flag) you'll need a transparent copy of it to save as a png. Once you pull it into the word doc you can resize and arrange as needed.

Also look at other "real" books you have lying around for ideas for things to add to your book! I turned an author's note into a "Forward", added an "about the author/publisher" section at the back, put in a table of contents, etc. There's other things I want to experiment with next time. Go wild! Have fun!

Test print a couple pages before printing the full project, just to be sure it's actually the right page size, your font is legible and spaced well, etc. If you don't have a printer and you don't want to pay a print shop for some expensive test pages, try your local library! Many let you use their computers and printers for an extremely low cost.

If you don't have a printer (or not one that can do quality printing for 200+ pages) you'll need to go to a print shop. DON'T bother with places like Staples or OfficeMax. I tried this, but their machines automatically staple "booklets" out of your signatures, which messes up your paper and costs extra for this "service." Instead, track down a local print shop in your area. It's easier to talk to them directly about what you want and the quality is better anyway.

On that note, this is an expensive hobby! Printing for Seven Deaths was about $87USD. The quality was worth it, but definitely do not start if you don't have your own printer or a little bit of spending money.

You do not need as much glue or thread as you think you need. Go less. Waste not.

A lot of the end stages is just...waiting...for...glue...to...dry.

You will inevitably, invariably, mess things up on your first project. I sure did! I underestimated the sharpness of some tools and put holes places I didn't mean to; some things glued in a bit sloppily; I didn't set up my page organization exactly right my table of contents ended up on the left page when I envisioned it on the right. But you know what? It doesn't matter! Because at the end of the day you have a book that YOU MADE. And it's still fucking awesome! And now you've learned some things for next time. Do it anyway and have fun with it!

Happy crafting, anon. I hope you are able to add some personal favorites to your bookshelf soon :)

[lawleon]

Complete FuniFuni Collection!

After many years of hunting I was finally able to complete my FuniFuni collection! I almost never see these plushies discussed in comparison to Fumos so I thought I'd talk about what I understand about them since the Circle that made them, Phantasm Screen, seems to be completely defunct. The initial run of Reimu, Marisa, and Sanae first showed up in July 2009 and the most "recent" additions, Satori, Orin, Remilia, and Flandre first showed up in August 2010. The only record of legitimate online sales of these plushies I can find is an old entry on Melonbooks for the hanging strap version of Orin from 2010. Some evidence suggests they were sold on Toranoana and at IRL events as well. They were most likely distributed at a few more events and probably at IRL bookstore/doujin shops after the final set was made before the Circle closed up shop. I would reasonably expect that all of these plushies are roughly a decade old, and no more new ones have been made since then. As time has passed it has obviously become more difficult to find online auctions for some of these, you can still find auctions for Reimu, Marisa, and Sanae somewhat often, but the plushies released later don't show up as often since there were fewer distributions of them. The full sized version of Satori was particularly difficult for me to locate, I think I won the only auction for the full sized Satori plush I had seen in 5 years? (For the absurd price of $12 plus shipping.)

These plushies are smaller in comparison to Fumos.

In my opinion the Funis are generally a bit more detailed than Fumos. More fabric types are used, with a lot of the frills Touhou outfits are known for are made of lace on the Funis versus the satin ribbons that Fumos use.

Additionally, if you'll forgive me for talking about plushie tooshie, Fumos generally stick with the exact same basic design for the area where the plushie sits, but Funis are willing to go into detail even down to the footwear. The bloomers are modeled like actual clothing, and look at Satori's socks and house slippers!

Let's talk about tags. In a world with bootleg Fumos, the presence or absence of a visible tag was probably the first thing people attempting to obtain one were taught to look for. Scalpers are not trying to duplicate Funis for fat stacks of cash so whether or not a Funi has a tag is more of a personal preference, or for a feeling of reassurance. I was able to obtain 12/13 of my Funis with tags, pictured below. (Did you think I was going to let the absence of a tag prevent me from buying the only Satori I had seen in like 7 years?)

Anyways, I've been hunting these for a long time and I'm very happy to have completed my collection. If you also enjoy Touhou plushies and are annoyed/infuriated with the resale market Fumo prices, and a character you enjoy is available in the limited selection, consider a FuniFuni instead. They are a highly detailed alternative plushie that generally sell for a fraction of the price of a Fumo. If you're interested in picking up any of these cuties you'll have to hunt on auction sites, but with the existence of Buyee now making proxy services easily accessible to most people, it's easier to get Funis for decent prices from JP Yahoo Auction. If anyone else out there is hunting for these I do wish you luck. Anyways, I need to get back to being mad about the fact that there aren't any Shinmyoumaru plushies, or goods in general. See'ya around!

[starrystrawb]

See now: Water Mother Nature. Water has been around as long as the planet has been. She will be here long after we are all gone. She is has seen it all and will witness everything that is to come. She is the depths of the Marianas trench, she has been the shallows of a back-yard creek.

On to the eco-tips!

1. A lot of phone cases are made of plastic. Even ones made of recycled plastic are well... plastic. But worry not friends! Some phone case companies take old cases and recycle them for you! Castify is one of them, and one that I regularly send my old cases to! To get an address to send the old cases to, email them on their website. Pack those old cases up, and ship them off to be reused! They even offer a discount on orders for sending them the old cases, and they take any brand!

2. Speaking of phone cases, Pela is a phone case company that makes compostable phone cases! They are made from plant material and are actually pretty cute. They are a bit pricey, so they're not for everyone. Other companies have similar cases that are made of plants, made from recycled plastics, or made in a sustainable and eco-friendly manner! Re-Castify is castify's version of this, ecoblvd also makes phone cases, and otterbox has a series called Core. And of course, keeping one phone case for a long time and reusing it over and over is always great!

3. Phone cases usually go on phones, so lets talk about those little guys! It feels like every year, the phone you just got is slowing down, dying faster, and is rapidly collecting more and more issues. Technology is always advancing, which is great! But a lot of the components in electronics end up being tossed in the trash. If you have things like old phones or tablets laying around, and you're unsure what to do with them, worry not! Research your options! Some places like zoos, tech shops, or second hand shops might have tech recycling programs. And of course, selling to a shop that refurbishes and sells tech is always an option. A lot of phone companies and providers have started offering trade ins! Don't feel guilty for upgrading, trade in, sell, or recycle your old phones, tablets, and other electronics!

4. Moving on from tech, lets talk about paper! Did you know you can make your own paper? It was a pretty popular trend in 2020-2022. You do need some supplies, like a blender, a picture frame, some sort of netting, and usually glue or tacks of some kind. But I've done it before, and it's actually pretty fun! You can even sprinkle seeds into it to make a card that you can plant! Google and youtube have some very handy and easy to follow tutorials!

5. Talk to people! Online, in person, over the phone. Everywhere! Share eco-tips (like we're doing here), talk about legislation, organize groups, everything! Keep each other moving and keep spreading information and helping others. It is so important to involve your friends, family, and community in eco-friendly living! We all share the planet, friends!

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