#i debated posting this cause i hate it but
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shared moments (dabi)
a handful of shared moments between you and your maybe more than friend, touya todoroki, the flame villain.
this is a prequel to the first fic i posted, pheonix, but it could be read as a standalone !
wc: 2.8k
reader is not described but is implied to have a quirk that makes them colder. i also imply that they're a nurse who frequently works with burn patients, including dabi's victims.
cw: 18+ ONLY !!! no smut, just kissing, grinding, and shirts come off but it ends pretty quickly after that. dabi accidentally wounds reader (a small burn from trying to wake him from a nightmare), mentions of abuse, murder, dying, and nausea. soft yet emotionally stunted and avoidant dabi
playlist: maybe by flower face, zombie by everglow, voidstar and longlegs by grim salvo
He’s shaking, head in your lap. You think he might be crying, but his hands are covering his face as he curls up as tight as he can. Dabi didn’t usually spend the night, but on rare occasion you can wrangle him into sleeping a few hours before running off who knows where. Tonight had been fun, daresay cozy, watching bad movies under a blanket so you could use him as a space heater and he could use you as an icepack.
It’s near four in the morning, far past when he usually sneaks out of your tiny apartment, when you awoke to his distress. He’d been squirming on his side of your too-small bed, mumbling and whimpering unconsciously. Even now, you don’t think he’s realized the small burn on your arm from trying to wake him, but you don’t move to soothe it; you’re too busy trying to soothe him. You rub his side over his shirt and pet a hand through his spiky hair even though he’s long since stopped shaking. You pretend you don’t care you have work in a few hours.
Now, he’s completely motionless, arms fallen to the cushion of the mattress. His voice is raspier than normal when he finally speaks, “…Sorry about that.”
“’S okay. I’ve seen worse.”
You both know he’s caused your ‘worse’.
“Do you wanna tell me what’s going on up here?” You tap your fingers softly against his temple. It’s a miracle he hasn’t moved yet.
“Don’t think that’s something you’d wanna hear about.”
“You can tell me anyways,” you can practically hear him go over the notion in his head. You met almost a year and you hardly know anything about the man besides his preferred snacks and the types of movies he likes to make fun of.
He thinks for a bit before stating, “you’ve never asked about my scars.”
You hum in agreement. The healed tissue is naturally textured but worsened from insufficient aftercare. The skin grafts look like they were done by someone with medical experience, at least. “Were you dreaming about when you got them?” The scar tissue on his face always made it look like the flames had tried to take him in its hands; like it wanted to soothe him. Console him. You want to do the same.
“Kinda,” he says after another long pause, like he’s trying to find the words, “maybe more like ‘why’.”
He can’t see you frown at that. You don’t like the implication it carries.
He’s quiet for a long time while you brush through his hair. It’s gotten longer- you think you can see blonde roots peak through the inky black.
“My old man…real shit guy,” he takes in a shaky breath and subtly curls deeper into your lap, “I’m gonna kill him one day.”
(You didn’t think he was serious, then.)
“All he cares about is power. He bought my ma so he could create a child more powerful than him. I’m the oldest of four- and his biggest failure,” you wince at the way he chuckles, “It’s funny. He got what he wanted. My youngest brother is a prodigy. He’s one of the top students at U.A.,” Dabi stops again, like he has to prepare himself for what he’s about to say, “I hated that kid for so long. Tried to kill him when he was a toddler, wanted to prove I was better than him. When I was twelve or thirteen I told dear old dad I got stronger,” another pause “He didn’t care,” another pause, like he’s debating telling you the rest at all, “I burned down half a forest, woke up three years later. The fucker who fixed me up showed me pictures of my funeral and everything. Ma got institutionalized not long after…but I gave myself a new name, since I died that day.”
“What was his name?” You ask impulsively. You wish you could take those words back, stuff them in your mouth and swallow them down
“Who’s?” He looks up.
“The boy who died.”
Dabi looks away again, contemplates before relenting, “Touya. Touya Todoroki”
“Touya sounds like a sweet kid. I hope he’s resting easy.”
It’s like the words flipped a switch in him. He shoots to sit up straight. His eyes are angry. Scared.
“You don’t know shit about him.”
“That’s not the point.”
He gets up, paces the length of the bed a few times, stops, looks at the ground, “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know shit about me.”
“And whose fault is that?” You really need to learn when to shut your stupid mouth.
He looks up. Sees you fully for the first time since waking. He can see the welt he caused on your arm in his post-nightmare panic. His anger dies. His eyes widen. You reach to slap your hand over it to shield it from view, but he has his jeans on and his jacket and boots in hand before you can find words to say. He’s out the door before you can ask him not to leave.
(You call out of work that day. You won’t hear from him for three weeks.)
Later that day, the search results for Touya Todoroki hurt as bad as you expected them to. There aren’t many paparazzi pictures of him, only a handful of him with his dad at award ceremonies.
His dad. Pro hero Endeavor.
The news coverage of his son’s death is minimal, and it’s mostly about Endeavor taking a leave of absence from hero duties to grieve with his family, but the obituary is public. The white haired boy in the picture looks so young. It’s not very detailed aside from denoting that his funeral was a private ceremony.
You open a new tab and search for fire related quirk malfunctions or natural disasters from around the same time. Its not hard to narrow down that the forest fire that destroyed Sekoto Peak was Dabi’s doing. The flames had been massive and unnaturally hot, nearly impossible to contain. There was barely anything left besides charred bone fragments from wildlife and the partial jawbone of the only human casualty they could find. The victim is unnamed, but it says the police were able to identify them through dental records and bring closure to the family.
There’s a handful of pictures of Endeavor at the scene. They make your stomach churn.
A third tab. Endeavor. There are news articles about his most recent achievements and a few about his youngest son, Shoto, who recently passed the entrance exams into U.A., just like Dabi said.
You feel nauseous.
It’s so comfy laying here wrapped around him like a koala. He’s cold and hot at the same time. There’s one hand cradling the back of your head to his chest while the other rubs your back over the blanket he draped over you.
You don’t usually let him in when work gets you like this. He’s usually the cause, being the most prolific fire quirked villain in the country, but you felt like you needed him today. A little boy had come in with his parents after his first quirk manifestation. All you could see was a young Touya Todoroki when you looked at him. Now all you feel is the pain you feel for the real thing who has you cradled in his arms like you’re more than maybe a friend.
Dabi is prickly when it comes to touch- despite the nerve damage, his scars are sensitive- but for you, he makes exceptions, especially since this is his first time seeing you since his meltdown last month. When he woke up in his dingy-ass apartment today, he knew he had to see you, knew something was wrong. His gut was right. You practically collapsed crying in his arms when you opened the door.
You’ve barely said anything since he’s settled the two of you down on your bed. Every time he thinks about saying something, you burrow impossibly closer into his chest like if you try hard enough you can crawl in his ribs and clean out all the ash and soot that make him up.
He wants to apologize for how he left. He wants to tell you he was scared, that he’s still scared, because he’s never let anyone get close the way you have, and he doesn’t know why he yearns for you to be closer. It’s the only time he ever wishes things had gone differently. If he was closer to a normal guy, less of one of the most wanted villains in the country, maybe he’d let himself be happy to be known by you.
But the only thing Dabi can do is destroy. He burns too hot to be anyone’s light.
Dabi is ruthless. He’s a monster, a villain, a killer; there’s nothing that could clean the blood from his hands.
That doesn’t stop him from pretending things are different, even if just for a moment. You’re naturally cooler to the touch and he finds it hard to imagine ever choosing to be anywhere but in your arms. It’s such an unfamiliar feeling.
Dabi’s never had to comfort someone before. He’s never really wanted to, either.
He isn’t one to be soft or kind or comforting. It’s all so confusing. How do you drag this out of him? Why is he so content with this moment? Something about you makes him different. He doesn’t know what to do with that.
He’s scared. He’s angry. He’s unhappy.
You pull yourself away from him completely, scooting to lay on your back on the other side of your bed.
“Sorry,” you mumble, “you can go now. That was probably really uncomfortable for you. You can leave now, if you want.”
Your eyes are so empty. He’s never seen you like this. He doesn’t know what to do. He thinks he wants to stay, make his last visit up to you with more time tonight, but would you rather he go? Should he ask about what upset you? This is so new to him.
He leaves.
The next time he’s over, you pretend to not notice the tension in the air. You move around in your usual sync, gathering snacks and scrolling through the worst rated movies you can find. You feign obliviousness to the way his eyes linger on you for longer than usual and curl up on the opposite side of the choice from him, like the months of slowly shifting closer to each other didn’t happen.
The jokes are bored and the laughs are empty.
He doesn’t spend the night. You don’t ask him to. He doesn’t know why he feels so hollowed out when he leaves.
A few weeks later, after watching movies and ignoring elephants in rooms, you fall asleep. Dabi waits, lets whatever’s playing continue to run while he watches you breathe in and out at a steady rhythm.
The credits roll. He turns off the T.V. and welcomes the darkness lit only by the city as he gets up to lay you down on your little couch. He’s never done this for you before- he doesn’t know why he’s doing it now. Your eyes flutter open as he kisses your forehead and tucks you into your blanket you keep out here.
(He did it without thinking, like it was natural, a habit. He was a big brother, once. He hadn’t realized that part of him survived.)
You look up at him as he stares down at you, eyebrows furrowed at his surprised expression. His eyes flicker to your lips without his permission. He’s already leaning over you, it’d be so easy to crawl on top of you, kiss you, wherever and however you want.
He doesn’t know what possesses him to do it. Maybe it’s Himiko’s insistence he grow up and take the risk, maybe it’s a moment of weakness where he allows himself to forget who and what he is, but he’s pressing a soft kiss to your lips without realizing. The contact makes your head jerk back, eyes wide in shock, surprise, wonder. You look at him like there’s something worthy of being looked at. His mouth moves to apologize, but you’re shooting your hands to hold his scarred cheeks and pressing you lips to his before he can try. Your skin is so cold against his had surprised at the lack of steam. He thinks you’re the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.
He doesn’t reciprocate in his shock. His response is even further delayed by the fact that he’s never done this before. He feels like a teenager- or what he imagines what being a teenager under more normal circumstances would allow him. As you move to pull away, afraid you’ve somehow overstepped, Dabi is snapped out of his shock, and he’s pulling you back in. His kiss is messy, wet, spit slick as his tongue licks into your mouth with no hesitation. The taste of his urgency is unexpected but he feels so incredible you can hardly stand it. You revel in the way his dull nails bite into your skin when you whimper at the sensation.
His hands are heavy as they make their way down your body, nearly pushing like he needs a constant reminder that this is real. Before you know it, he’s on the couch, on top of you, pushing at your shirt and you’re pulling it over your head in compliance. Dabi takes the moment to yank off his own; his torso is a marble of normal and scarred skin with a shiny barbell through each nipple. You wonder briefly if the metal is hot like the rest of his skin as his lips crash back into yours. One hand in your hair, the other on your waist- he’s pushing you down, pulling you in, until he's all but crushing you in his desperation.
You moan when he lets up, “Dabi-“
“No, no- don’t call me that. I don’t want to feel like a villain with you,” he’s equally breathless, practically heaving above you.
“…Touya?”
Your uncertainty is immediately discarded when he fully moans at the sound of his given name on your lips, “yes, yes, thank you-“ and he’s kissing you again, cradling your face like you’re porcelain but grinding down like you’re the farthest thing from fragile.
His grip tightens when the pressure of his hips makes you moan.
The weight of his body makes you dizzy. His lips and hands move down your neck, licking, biting, and sucking at all the skin newly exposed to him and it feels so good you don’t now what to do with yourself. You decide on shoving your hands in his hair; you’re pulling it at the root when he bites down next, and he’s moaning into your throat like it might kill him to be quiet.
What does he want from me? The question crashes through your brain like a bullet. You don’t know if you want to actually ask. Would it be so bad to let this happen, just to have him close like this? Is the burden of wanting from afar easier to carry than having him halfway? Yes. Of course it is.
Your sudden unresponsiveness stills him. He pulls away to find your eyes distant and face neutral.
“Touya?” You ask after a silent minute filled with his thumbs rubbing circles in your waist, “what did that mean? To you, for us?”
He gulps, “I don’t know.”
He hadn’t thought this far ahead. He hadn’t thought at all.
“You don’t know,” you echo.
He’s off you before you can decide what to make of his answer.
“Sorry, don’t know why I did that- sorry,” you think you hear as he fumbles around for his coat and his boots. You don’t say anything. You don’t even look at him. Instead, you focus on the ceiling it’s almost too dark to see. You think you hear him pause at your door, but your head is so loud and intelligible you aren’t paying attention.
The static doesn’t block out the sound of your front door shutting, though.
(Neither of you realize he left his shirt behind until after he’s already out the door. You pretend you resist the urge to cuddle it to catch his scent on it, and he will pretend he doesn’t imagine you doing just that.)
Ever the coward, Touya runs. He throws up his shame once he’s in his own apartment. He knows he shouldn’t have left. He didn’t want to- but he didn’t know how to stay either.
He hates himself more than he has in a long time for tonight.
His burner buzzes in his pocket. It’s Shigaraki. plans in motion.
He doesn’t think you’ll forgive him for doing this, but it’s been building since before he met you. It’s not like he has any sort of life or future to look forward to anyways. It’s not like he gives you much to miss anyways.
Soon. Endeavor’s head. Soon.
dividers by @/issysh3ll and @/thecutestgrotto
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#dabi bnha#dabi mha#dabi x reader#dabi angst#mha angst#bnha angst#touya todoroki angst#touya todoroki x reader#ʚїɞ dabi#ʚїɞ lauren wrote what
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mandatory pride post??? also i suck at drawing these guys
#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#deancas#destiel#castiel#sam winchester#crowley#pride month#happy pride#yayy#i hate this show#i want them to burn#i debated posting this cause i hate it but#whatever#art#art is hard#artists on tumblr#my art#spn fanart#fanart
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Okay. Fellas. Real talk. I've seen some of you do it and I thank you profusely for doing so but can yall PLEASE credit the original artist of that piece yall kinda made into an a dtiys/art meme? That's not official art. I am point blank refusing to engage with any of these pieces that I see not doing such. (Even when it pains me to keep scrolling, because some of them are really good!! And I want them here!!! But I do have some rules for myself I try to stand firm by with this blog.)
Like you can literally see them say right there that it's fine IF YOU CREDIT. I'm fucking begging you.
I'm not mad at anyone who didn't know but I've seen SO MANY versions at this point, and I think I've seen maybe 3 or 4 of them RECENTLY include the credit. (And one with improper credit, I think?) Please. Please just. Tack it on.
#ive been sitting on this for a couple days but im very tired and i would just like us all to please be reasonable. just. edit it into your +#+ captions. please. nothing to be done abt people who've already reblogged stuff but please. please please please#respect your fellow artists enough to credit where credit is do#ooc#txt#spto#sp comic#spvtw#spvtwtg#scott pilgrim#scott pilgrim vs the universe#scott pilgrim takes off#i added alt text just in case but i seriously cannot stress enough how much extensive typing like this is fucking uo my hand a bit#so if anyone wants to better/fully transcribe the screenshots ill rb it and/or edit the alt text that's currently there#also. again. im really not mad at anyone who didn't know. but like. come on guys. i know someone else made a post abt this cause i was +#+ debating adding something along these lines to that post but i figured I'd just make my own (anxietyyy *finger guns as though this is +#+somehow supposed to be the better alternative*)#edit: i hate it when i come back and find a typo that im unsure how to fix. but also even if i fixed it i shot myself in the foot queueing +#+it up already... 😑 im very tired
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#think I need to delete TikTok#been on the bad side and been getting pro life debaters on my fyp#finally decided to go up and say something cause I was getting so annoyed and upset#OH BOY that was a bad decision#never ever doing that again#and this is why I can’t go out and be around normal people#I can’t even talk to a stranger online#I’m literally shaking and bawling right now#it’s 5:43am and I meant to go to bed like 3 hours ago#wanted to post on TikTok and see if I could get any $$ cause I’m desperate#but nah that ain’t gonna happen cause people suck and I hate everyone and anything I make would be shit#and I can’t do anything right#basically I was trying to explain that mental health comes into play too… that abortion isn’t just black and white#I should have known before I even tried that first of all he’s a male and he wasn’t listening to anyone talk#I just have so many things I want to say but no one to say them#and it was a smaller live so I was like why not and fuck that fuck that fuck that nope#too mentally ill for that 🙃#gonna try and go to bed and calm down my heart#sorry I haven’t been posting or on much…. been struggling more than words could ever express#php helped and I felt a glimmer of hope for a day and a half and ever since it’s just been a downward nonstop spiral#love you all and hope you guys are doing okay 🫶#just needed to vent lol and since I have no friends y’all get to hear it 👌#shut up rosie
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#personal#internets#at this rate I've unfollowed both of the kinda.. 'controvercial' blogs I've been following#since there was a good chunk of actually good takes about how bad media is now and society and braindead internet 'activists' that-#-had it too good in their western countries and NEEDED to invent the reason to bully and excile people#could honestly resonate with it despite some other posts causing genuine pain. but mostly about terribly handled media#like you know that thing when corporations do terrible ass rep to pretend that they care for minorities#or artificially fabricate online backlash against their new actors to show investors that people show interest for their product because-#-of all the clicks on their article?#like discussion of this kind sorta keeps me sober#as a person with BPD I get contaminated by opinions VERY easily and as an autist I will believe everything if it is put together 'logically#that's why I HAVE to be exposed to every possible opinion so I am forced to make out my own rather than being swayed anywhere#but at this point those blog became kinda.. bad? like they don't just have 'opinions' but they hate just to hate#but now my dashboard and recs are full of exclusively things I can fully agree with and I am scared that it will rot my brain#like.. emotions are always the same. where is the 'wait WHAT' effect? where is anger? where is self-reflection?#but ALSO I realized that 'those' blogs are no better than those western 'warriors' I despise and they become narrow-minded too in the end#they advertise themselves as 'open to debate' only to always sway debate into trying to win and not into actually discovering the truth#I cannot trust any side because they're all narrow-minded and hostile but I cannot trust people without any side because-#-they're fence-sitters without morals that side with the winner#is there a secret third thing? like is there a way to not take a side but to still HAVE ideals and opinions?#my problem is that if I am not exposed to people that trash everything I value I forget why AM I valuing [a thing] to BEGIN with#and that won't do will it
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Seeing your reblog about racing pride got me thinking.. 20 drivers who are all straight seems very unlikely lol. In your opinion who gives off vibes that they could be lgbt+?
(Not meant to be anything just a bit lighthearted!)
Mmmmm I won’t lie to you anon, I have thoughts, but I’d also say a lot are coloured by who I like and who I don’t like, and also very public facing persona’s. We don’t get to know drivers lives behind the scenes.
I would probably find it very fun to dive down this idea path! But I can’t really do that with a clear concious, because I strongly believe it’s not okay to seriously speculate on peoples sexuality, neurodivergence or medical conditions.
I have been the person who laughs/ gets very mad at “max verstappen isn’t bad he’s just autistic and bisexual” posts, especially the offensive nature of the former, so while I think this would be a funny convo, and I’m not immune to JOKINGLY calling out George and Lewis for having bi traits, it’s not a full post I can make on tumblr without being a massive hypocrite.
Sorry anon, no shame on you for asking! I’m aware of the irony given I post rpf, but you gotta put a fictional line in somewhere.
#asks#anonymous#god I hope it comes acrosss I’m really not mad!#and I have absolutely had this debate with friends in discord and dms#but here where posts can blow up and get taken waaaay too seriously#or mockingly#I don’t feel comfrotable doing it#I don’t want someone who hates George or Lewis getting mad at me cause I said I think he’s probably not 100% het#or someone else getting mad I called their favourite white boy heterosexual
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oh shit he's monologuing SOMEONE STOP HI-
Next->
<-previous
#the ambitions of an eccedentesiast#dr jekyll and mr hyde#ocs#chapter one#page seven#late upload woooo#I was staying after school and forgot to que the post before I left TTwTT#I had fun though don't worry#only adding ear detail to things like elf ears and shit until I figure myself out TTwTT#cause its fine sometimes but its also like#mmmm#you know#anyway#if your standing by the door debating leaving and not wanting to talk to anyone and every noise is too much and the lights are too bright -#and you hate it there#then maybe you should leave my guy#maybe you should go home-#just saying.
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What do you think of figurama figures?? I know they’re supposed to be cool and big but I think they aren’t painted very well—a lot of them (the lupin iii one specifically) look kind of dirty? And not in a good way. Have you posted any before?
you mean this one? no i haven't posted any, resin/polystone statue companies usually put a lot of logos on their promo pics which is fair but doesn't look great as a figure post imo.
i get that! i'm generally not a resin/polystone statue person at all so i don't really look at them and i honestly don't love the "look" that most statues have (unsure what it is, they just look different from pvc figs). i do definitely understand their appeal, it's just not for me!
#gonna ramble in the tags cause i don't wanna make this post annoyingly long. so i'll make the tags annoyingly long heehee#reasons why i don't buy statues 1. they're massive i don't have that kinda space 2. they're heavy my detolfs would collapse#3. they're heavy my wallet would collapse (shipping costs....) 4. small pieces often break during shipping based on unboxing vids i've seen#5. they're very expensive 6. the market isn't THAT big so they would be very hard to sell in the future#ok that's all. again this is no hate i really do see the appeal trust me.....i very seriously debated spending €900 on a dabi resin statue#oh also your comment about their paint jobs. i'm unsure tbh like i said i don't love the Statue Look in general so it's kinda hard to tell#i think their shading looks muddy sometimes but also sometimes their colouring looks flat. idk how those coexist but they do#one of the few characters they did whose face i'm very familiar with is black lagoon revy and i don't think they got the face right sorry...#then again no one fucking does. they really never do. but it would've been nice if they did this time#ok that's all <3 sorry for writing an essay#ask#anon#non figure
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I am BORED someone give me enrichment NOW
#rat rambles#I can only replay cotl so many times (finished my fourth playthrough yesterday) any my sibling still has the switch#like I technically also got incription a while back but Im still debating between if I wanna try streaming ut or not#mainly idk if its the sort of game that my laptop would scream at or not and I wanna go in as blind as possible#I considered streaming cotl but dear god does my laptop hate running it even without also streaming#thank god they added the auto cooking and fishing features fucking life savers#I already have over 100 hours in the game for some reference of how much Ive been playing it#I might have to try for the rest of the damageless boss achievements Im missing since theyre all I need for all achievements#I got damageless leshy on my first try tho so thats fun#Im thinking I might have to go for golden fleece strats + wraiths to get kalamar at least since Im too impatent to dodge good#my strat across all viddy games is to kill the guy before they kill me and its gotten me this far so xhdjgdkdy#rly I actually need the half a second kill strats for heket because dear god do I hate fighting her#not cause of her herself but because you have to fight two of my number 2 most hated mini boss#number one being that stupid bat guy also from anura cause I fucking HATE the flies#I used to hate barbados a lot more but theyre easy to read I was just stupid#anyways this is why I havent been posting much lol Ive been hyperfixating on this game hard and am embarrassed abt it dhdjgdjdh#not in like a. fandonfication way to be clear Im not going that low just as a video game#and I cant help but feel guilty abt it unfortunately 😔#Im not even being cringe but Im still not free hdkdhdmhfj
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I find it pretty funny how at least half of my posts have tags as long or longer than the post itself
#the tags are where the real interesting thoughts go#this is my rambling place#I can think of at least 5 posts only 1-2 sentences long with like 20 tags#I’m a court jester. how good I am at that job is up for debate - but I’m a jester nonetheless#am I adding meaningless tags to this post for the bit? yes. yes I am.#but have I don’t this many many times not on purpose? also yes. yes I have.#seriously just browse my og post tag that proof is all there#anyway. how y’all been?#rn I’m drawing fan art and posting on tumblr instead of doing my school work#my mom says my cat smells like shit but I can’t smell anything and his butt is clean#to be fair to her my sense of smell is at like 5% strength at all times#pre Covid it was like 20% and then I was doomed to only smell the strongest stuff in the world for the rest of my life#I can’t smell candles unless I snort it so close the flames burn my nose hairs#so instead I buy incense#cause I can smell that without getting burned#my mom hates it cause it gives her a headache#I have learned how to taste medium strength smells to compensate#like a fuckin snake#kinda like how some blind people learn echolocation#I can smell the litter box though! I hate it!#like thanks universe; of all the few things I can smell you make me Suffer#I also hate cleaning dishes cause of that because damp old food being washed down the drain to coagulate together right in front of my face#it smells awful and I’d rather not that be the only thing I smell all day#so instead I just put dishes away#I also hate vacuuming#not for smell reasons; our vaccum just sucks and it turns really easily and runs away from me#I’d rather use a broom; they’re predictable#and if shit gets in the carpet I’ll crawl around with a tiny hand vacuum#oh look I reached tag limit. nice.#randum thots
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got angry at a story last night
#uh not gonna tag this for visibility#mainly cause I don't know HOW to tag it lmao#I'm just angy cause like YES corpo zoos are bad because the people running it care more about the money than the animals#but there ARE zoos that want to help animals and put in the effort for them#and like it's so important especially for endangered species#but that's like just my general issue with zoo hate#THIS story pissed me off because it left no room for debate#and and it was framed in an 'objectively correct' light#I am like 90% sure the author is just a kid and this might be an early project of theirs#in a perfect world zoos would not exist#unfortunately humans are cruel#and sometimes zoos are the only way to prevent the cruelty from causing extinction#yeah my thoughts r all over the place lol#I'm just always confused because I am NOT a confident writer#I'm constantly looking up words and concepts I'm not familiar with to at least get a basic grasp of things#so when I witness people NOT doing that by having critical typos or obviously non-researched topics im like#what do you guys do with all that confidence??#I guess post your stories lol#I'm out here looking at my dozens of WIPs that have never seen the light of day
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the reason i dont talk as much about jjba cecio is bc he is very strongly a piss take of the 'one good pig' because he is the 'one good cop' but hes actually so much worse. hes using a mask of humor and kindness and relate-ability to help aid in murder blackmail wrongful imprisonment and all manner of massive power abuses, but because he does the bare minimum of pretending to be a 'good' person [in the right way] he gets free license to do all that and is seen as sympathetic. so actually hes not worse, hes just an average fucking pig with slight different motivations it doesn't matter if he answers to the police or criminal organizations, because the fucking pigs are their own gang just under the guise of 'upholding the law' and hes betraying his community and ruining peoples lives over and over for power either way
#thebirdspeaks#cecio#essay in teh tags about crows self doubt about how well they handle mature topic and if ppl will think badly of them if they dont do it per#perfect so they dont post shit bc they r worried about the piss on the poor reading comprehension of the internet or worse#being seen as sympathetic 🤢 to cops 🤮#in 1... 2... 3...#im not spilling my personal shit#but like. i worry about sharing more of what he does bc im worried people wont understand how im writing him#bc shits subjective but im writing from my own experience with abusers and cops and just authority in general#its why hes hands down the worst of Celia & Co. they are all awful#but him especially so.#ive debated rewriting him cause its hard to write but i like how it affects his character even when its uncomfortable to write and even mor#so to share#idk. maybe i will end up just make him into a mortician or forensics guy#but like. him abusing all the ways the law is corrupt for his own goals and using all the defenses even better than the other pigs#positioning himself as the good one while making sure none else is and being the worst#is my own commentary on the joke that is the justice system. and i find it interesting#idk i think a lot of it is my personal discomfort. and i would hate to be labeled as like. 🤢 supporting pigs. in my writing#idk#this might get deleted idk i think im to sensitive to potential criticism from bad faith reading#but idk if i do handle it well or not#but then again im not a major fucking tv show let me fuck up a lil#i guess i just scrutinize how people write cops a lot#and thinking the internet has bad reading comprehension is not a baseless anxiety#eh fuck it i think i can do my lil fukcing thing#i just dont want people to see it as in poor taste#cause i worry they would be right? but like so many ppl in fandom be wilding maybe i can get a pass for maybe being a lil clumsy?
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#*eye twitch* i hate how affected i am when people refute things i say that i know are true#and if its something that Technically could be debatable i try to be nice and find a middle ground but theyre a patronising prick about it#i just feel so dumb when i know im fucking not#like a lot of how the world works and is run is because of evil fucking people and their money#and to be told 'oh no drugs and gangs are the root causes of these problems' like sure they contribute but you think there arent a lot of#rich people that benefit and actively contribute to these systems???#whered the drugs come from. who uses trafficked people.#like ive watched documentries and read articles about this shit but in the moment i just dont know how to articulate myself and i cant#remember exact facts so i get brushed off as just being someone thats deluded#its so fucking exhausting#le text post#and the lesson basically is idk why i keep trying and i should just keep my mouth shut tbh
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yk the ice that has a hole in the middle?? like they’re usually big boys and clear? it’s my least fave type of ice cause it’s so hard to chew and what’s the point of ice if not to chomp?!?!1!!1!
#debating putting this on tumblr or just adding to my notes app#cause i have too many thoughts like this on there#how much would you hate it if i started doing it here??!#i probs won’t cause i get embarrassed about posting#reblogging’s cool but my own posts make me wanna crawl into a hole and never come out#will i probably delete this in the morning when im fully conscious?? probs#anyways#oversharing on the internet is my favorite pastime#k bye lolz
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Okay but I keep on thinking about this because it also reminded me of this one scene/panel
Because like.
Yes, this is meant to be a silly little joke about Ace, Roger's yet-to-conceived-son and, the tragedy of what would come of Ace aside, show to us how Roger was fully planning on getting not just laid but also having A Son soon
But like.
There's an absolutely deranged part of me that looks at this and wonders.
Could Roger have slept around before this and had another child with someone else, long before having Ace with Rouge
...
...
@ Myself
Still going through some SBS and y'know, this one stood out to me
From Vol 99
When Oda "plays dumb" it's usually because he's trying to avoid spoilers and so he's intentionally not saying anything. So there's like two potential answers to this question;
Either the baby they were talking about was Shanks and Oda was hiding it because Shanks being found at God Valley hadn't been revealed yet (and wouldn't be for two more years)
Or Roger and/or Rayleigh have been around more babies in the past. And if so, whose baby was that and when
#Moon posting#OP Meta#THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS SUGGESTION#.........Unless#Thing is if Crocodile's trans this would be before he transitioned too so Roger wouldn't have known he already had a son#And yeah if Roger had another child with someone then he might've interacted with that baby in the past so the OG comment wasn't aboutShank#Who Roger's previous lover was and what happened to her is up to debate but like#As I have pointed out in the past it is strange/curious how Shakky quit her position as Kuja Pirate Empress and moved to Sabaody#If Roger's previous lover did pass away suddenly and Roger specifically didn't want to keep the child on-board/wanted them safe#Then Rayleigh's girlfriend could've been a trustworthy option for whom to entrust the child to???????#This really would be the most cursed fucking option for Crocodile's parents because of Crocodad. 'Cause like.#Suddenly Crocodile and Ace would be step-siblings and Ace would be Luffy's step-uncle#And Pirate King Gol. D Roger would be Luffy's other fucking grandpa how bloody deranged would that family be#Could you fucking imagine Garp's face if he found out. The man would probably die of a heart attack then and there#But also as I had previously discussed if we did somehow end OP with TWO Pirate Kings. Like. Roger's prediction would turn out correct#Also. I hate that this thought even passed my mind but. You remember the fucking giant golden Bananawani on top of Rain Dinners?#Golden Bananawani. A golden crocodile. Gol. D Crocodile. I swear to god if Apollo just hit me with the gift of prophesy
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I Missed You
lando norris x fem reader
summary: You missed seeing Lando being happy after a race, and you couldn't wait to tell him how proud you were. (1.4k words)
warnings: fluff, stablished relationship, a bit of mclaren slander
a/n when i tell you i loved this idea SO SO much. i’m not too sure i’m happy with how this turned out but i really hope you guys enjoy it 🩷 i apologise for posting this just before the race but it was a bit hard to get started for some reason 😭 anyway pls let me know what you think!!
check out the original request here!
↺ back to navigation — send me a request!
The weekend in Monza was one you were hoping to forget. The tension in the air reflected not only in the team but also in the comments people were making about it, having even sports commentators and content creators question McLaren’s entire strategy to keep their fighting position in the WCC and also have a shot at the WDC.
Lando’s demeanour immediately after getting off the car was something you would never forget, though, even if you tried. It was pretty obvious for everyone, even if he tried his hardest to never say something bad about his team and his teammate. That team was his home anyway. He had been with McLaren even before his F1 career started, and even after weekends like this one, he would never doubt he wanted to achieve great things with them.
That is probably what made it harder for him. This year they were competing not only for points and podiums but for something bigger, and after knowing what he is capable of, ending up in that position absolutely crushed him, and you hated to see him debating with himself.
Once the weekend was finally over and you were leaving Italy, you wanted to make him feel better, telling him how great he was and how proud you were. You even shot some comments at McLaren for everything that went down, but he didn’t want to hear it; he barely wanted to talk about it, so you just dropped it. You understood him anyway, so you had to leave everything behind and just be supportive of your boyfriend.
You were hoping this weekend would be different, better, everyone was, and there was a lot of talking in the team that they would make the right decisions to keep fighting now that they had the chance. This, of course, would only mean something until they actually proved it during the race.
Lando was in a better mood coming into this weekend; he trusted his team and he was confident they were backing him up. That was until the qualifying came. A yellow flag being pulled out by mistake during Q1 caused him to lose the opportunity to even put up a fight, and he ended up being P17. It wasn’t even his fault, but you knew he was beating himself up for that result.
“Lando,” you called him right after he came back to the garage to watch the rest of the qualifying. He looked at you with a disappointed smile. “It’s not your fault, baby.”
“I know.” He pulled you into a hug, not wanting you to worry about him too much. “There’s nothing I could have done. We just have to wait and see what we can do tomorrow.”
“I’m sure you’ll do amazing,” you replied into his chest, rubbing small circles in his back to let him know you were there for him, no matter what.
“We’ll see. The car felt okay, but it’s hard to overtake on this track. It’s quite a long straight.” He let out a nervous giggle as he pulled away; he didn’t sound as confident as you were hoping, but you knew he was right. “Some of it is just going to have to cross our fingers.”
There was no point in fighting him when he got like that, so you just nodded. “I’ll be crossing everything I have then.”
He went off with the rest of his team as you stayed back to watch the rest of the cars complete the qualifying. The air was starting to get tense again, and even though you knew everyone was nervous with Lando’s result, you weren’t sure if it was just your own feelings talking. But like Lando said, you were going to have to wait and see what the team could come up with, you were just hoping they would do the right thing.
Race day was finally here, and with Lewis starting from the pit lane due to a new power unit and Pierre being excluded due to fuel flow rate, Lando had been promoted to P15. Sure, it would have been better if Lando had the chance to fight for his starting position, but at least that was something.
You could see he was still not completely confident in how the race would go, but you trusted enough for the both of you.
Watching the race from the garage was something that always made you incredibly nervous, but especially in this position. But Lando managed to get to P12 by lap 2, and everyone was incredibly excited by his overtakes.
As the race went on and he felt more confident with the car, he started to climb his way up to the top 10, trusting the team’s decisions with the strategy they were sticking to, and you were so glad everything was falling in place.
The rest of the race still made you bite your nails at how nervous you were, but the bliss in the entire garage when he overtook someone was indescribable. He was driving the race of his life, and even the radios he exchanged with the team radiated that. As always, the last few laps were nervewracking, but the fact that he made it all the way to P6 and was even helping Oscar with his own race left everyone with a good taste. Not a complete terrible weekend after all.
During the last lap, however, an unfortunate crash between Carlos and Checo pushed him to P4, meaning he gained 11 positions during the race; not that you ever doubted him, but seeing him end up there with the fastest lap after an absolute mess of the qualifying made you excited to see him. After confiming everyone was okay, you took the liberty to celebrate your boyfriend’s race.
Lando got out of the car and went to greet his team, cheers and smiles all over the place. Everyone was praising him for the incredible work he made, and his smile didn’t go away for a second the entire time.
You knew you would still have to wait to congratulate him; he still had to do media before coming back to his room, where you were waiting for him, but seeing him so happy in the monitors made you grow impatient.
It felt like it had been a while since you saw him so happy after a race.
After what felt like forever, you heard him come back to the garage. You stoop up from the small couch and opened the door, where you were greeded by your boyfriend.
“Hey, you.” You said, closing the door behind him.
“Hi,” he replied, smile so big you could see his dimples.
“That was amazing, Lando. I knew you would do amazing, but I can’t even describe how proud I am.”
He smiled even more at your words. He closed the distance between you when he took a few steps, wrapping you in his arms and kissing you deeply. You could even feel him smiling then, and that filled your heart.
“Thank you; it was a good day,” he said when he pulled away, looking down at you with loving eyes. “I think everything worked out.” You just nodded as you admired him.
“I missed you,” you whispered as you brushed a few curls that fell on his forehead.
“What do you mean? We’ve been together the last three weeks. You saw me just before the race." To say he was confused was an understatement, and you could see it in his face.
“I mean you, this. I missed seeing you so happy and smiley. Looks good on you.”
Lando was a bit embarrassed by your confession; he thought he did a better job at hiding how much the results affected him, at least to you. It was never his intention to be so down when he was with you, but man, was he endeared by your words. “I needed this,” was all he said, and you know he was right. And it wasn’t only him; you knew the team needed this as well.
“I know, and I know you hate to hear it, but I told you.”
He let out a laugh, not a nervous one this time. “Yes, you did,” he hugged you again, much tighter as he buried his face on the crook of your neck. “Thank you for being here and supporting me, even during my bad times.” He spoke with so much sincerity.
“I wouldn’t change it for the world.”
#lando norris#ln4#lando norris fluff#lando norris x reader#lando norris fanfic#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you#formula 1#f1#lando norris smut#giannaln4 writes#lando norris x y/n#mclaren#lando norris one shot#lando norris oneshot#f1 x reader
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