#think I need to delete TikTok
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#think I need to delete TikTok#been on the bad side and been getting pro life debaters on my fyp#finally decided to go up and say something cause I was getting so annoyed and upset#OH BOY that was a bad decision#never ever doing that again#and this is why I can’t go out and be around normal people#I can’t even talk to a stranger online#I’m literally shaking and bawling right now#it’s 5:43am and I meant to go to bed like 3 hours ago#wanted to post on TikTok and see if I could get any $$ cause I’m desperate#but nah that ain’t gonna happen cause people suck and I hate everyone and anything I make would be shit#and I can’t do anything right#basically I was trying to explain that mental health comes into play too… that abortion isn’t just black and white#I should have known before I even tried that first of all he’s a male and he wasn’t listening to anyone talk#I just have so many things I want to say but no one to say them#and it was a smaller live so I was like why not and fuck that fuck that fuck that nope#too mentally ill for that 🙃#gonna try and go to bed and calm down my heart#sorry I haven’t been posting or on much…. been struggling more than words could ever express#php helped and I felt a glimmer of hope for a day and a half and ever since it’s just been a downward nonstop spiral#love you all and hope you guys are doing okay 🫶#just needed to vent lol and since I have no friends y’all get to hear it 👌#shut up rosie
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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sometimes i see really stupid internet things and feel like throwing my phone into a lake but then i remember it's on me for having social media in the first place
#like seriously i need to delete the few social media i have that aren't tumblr lol#specifically tiktok i'm dead serious there are things that poison my brain so bad i will delete my account as well so i won't have anything#to return to#i don't even mean fandom bullshit i mean hateful things that make me think damn people think that way about people like me...?#like dang how many people out there THINK THIS WAY...#and i'm better off not knowing you know it's all so stupid#and yes also stupid fandom bullshit the other day i blocked someone for saying we should normalize hating rodimus prime#I THINK NAWT ☝���� die.#but yeah ^_^#as for deleting tiktok i shall do so on january 1st mark my words ok
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#just saw like half of a tiktok and the urge to make another vent post....#but i wont i dont wanna get into the discourse lol#all im gonna say is - just bc buck 'likes to fix things' doesnt mean he's gonna drop everything to deal with eddies mess#he has his own life and if he wants to have dinner with his bf after a hard day he can#bobby is with his wife and resting why would buck stick around#and Eddie's situation is not bucks to fix - he was there for support and did what he always does#like yeah eddie is about to lose chris and it's awful but what do you expect buck to do about it??? there's literally nothing he can#why are people now mad that he wasnt with Bobby or Eddie and instead went to have dinner with tommy#and it wasnt ooc imo - this is buck finally thinking of himself and his needs first like he should#he won't always be there to fix things for every single person bc he shouldn't be??#(and imo nothing about the convo was weird or ooc either - maybe rushed but they had a minute lol)#well i guess it did turn into a vent in the tags lmao#im gonna delete this im just sooooo annoyed#tiktok how many times do i have to say i wanna stay off 911tok ugh
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i miss experiencing stuff alone
#you can't experience anything these days without 53 analysis 26 commentary videos 94 step by step walk throughs#it's just exhausting#i want the eras tour book because i love tour books and experiencing them for the first time#but i've already seen like 18 think pieces on it and all the 'fun facts' shared posted#like there's nothing to experience anymore#k think i really need to delete tiktok again for this reason but it's just so depressing#eris: text
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i think i need to like uninstall every app on my phone.tumblr is more of a journal than a social media 2 me so im excluding this. but i think i need to
#i feel like im rotting#just tiktok and instagram and youtube doom scrolling or spacing out at nothing#putting a video on and ignoring it#i think i just need to delete everything#for likr a month
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(source tweet by @bankpunnx)
#topten supakorn#goddess bless you from death#i'm sorry the character is what??#i don't think this is actually a spoiler/it may be something from a scene or only for the trailer or who knows but JUST IN CASE ->#goddess bless you from death spoilers#and in case it needs to be said: i do not want novel spoilers you will be obliterated etc thank you#screenshots bc i don't trust topten to not delete this#but also is gbyfd the reason topten has been playing horror games (and def not getting scared!!) on tiktok lately? lmao
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is fandom culture dying or am I just in dead fandoms
#soul eater#fairy tail#voltron#yuri on ice#yknow looking at these tags… this MIGHT be a me problem#I think the only thing I’ve gotten really into lately is Scavengers Reign and I feel no desire to write fic for it… it’s just too good#oh and obviously BG3 but kind of same thing there#if the writing is good and I’m satisfied… I don’t feel inclined to write or read fic#ok but hold on bc YOI and SE were very well written IMO so maybe I’m just getting older#maybe I need to delete more socials#I already got rid of FB and Twitter#there are klance comics I follow on insta so no dice#but I should delete TikTok… I don’t want to but that’s also how I KNOW I should#and YT too probably#maybe I just need to go camping for like two weeks with no cell service and scavenge for food… I think that would fix me
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the best part of the kawaikute gomen manga was when she said “IT’S KAWAIKUTE GOMEN TIME” and kawaikute gomen-ed all those guys
#i’ve had time to sleep on yesterday’s releases and i still think chizuutan needs help#though h e lp now that i think about it…#chizuutan’s deletion of her aizo folder in the [redacted] anime was p much a breakup scene in of itself#considering the weight of her unhealthy feelings for him and all#get help girllllll it’d be so funny if she got together with the random bg guy with the face reveal from sukicchu no#but man. imagine ai-chizu actually becoming canon though#aizo evades all the [redacted] anime’s attempts to hook him up with hiyoko#*and* mutually dodges the unintentional flags that he set up with mona (who hates him solely bc he’s associated with yujiro)#only to end up dating the insane stan twt user with an unhealthy fixation+parasocial feelings for him#god. it’d be so funny thoughhhhh. yujiro’d be cryin in the club#tfw you sing ‘koko dayo’ but your bf ends up ditching you for a kawaikute gomen tiktok dancer#i still want lxl canon thoughhhhh. let them self-contain their stupidity pls#but. hm. i wonder if chizuutan knows just *how* lxl get their kissmarks on. considering how jealous she gets of other julieta and stuff…#i want her and yujiro to fight for aizo’s hand in marriage just bc it’d be funny. juri can be the referee ig#chizuutan chizpost
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tiktok hurts me so bad bc why do people think its fine to just record total STRANGERS who are acting out because they're clearly struggling/going through something, then post it to go viral? for all you know that could be their lowest point and ur just standing there recording..
#idk i just saw a tiktok of someone in a store taking a bunch of glass bottles of a shelf and throwing them at the ground and its just a#crowd of people recording and laughing at this person#like that person is hurting & needs love and help and you cant even think for 2 seconds about what youre doing to post that to tiktok..#imagine if that was you!!!!#sorry i dont know why im complaining to tumblr about this i should probably invest in like a diary#delete later
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Hdjjdjdoso I’m redownloading genshin rn and I had to delete 5000+ photos and videos, all of my apps INCLUDING CALCULATOR, MUSIC, CONTACTS, AND MORE ????!? And I still don’t have space for genshin whdhhsjskos
#.o.o skipping stones#why does genshin need 30gb huh 🤨🤨#I had to get rid of tiktok YouTube twitter and discord too#and I’m trying to transfer my tumblr to my iPad bc I think I have to delete it too 😭#genshin impact#genshin impact memes
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nia bia !! i am here… with your akaashi & bokuaka edits !! >//< please enjoy the edits along with my silly ramblings about them <3
here we have bokuaka edits YIPEEE !! one & two
and now… yummy akaashi edits PHEW !! one (my favorite of all time !! i mustn’t gatekeep it because you deserve to see it. he is so handsome RAHHH) two & three (he’s so pretty i’ll cry T^T)
and a silly akaashi art skit as a lil treat !! <3 link
if you ever need yummy edits you know where to find me !! my collection grows day to day i fear… akaashi is just soso pretty and beautiful PLS !! i must share them with you i am legally obligated :3
KYAAAAAAAAA
EDITS W MY LEGEND CHENGONGZI123. i think i saw the second one on instagram and i'm still just as stunned and excited now I Love U Chengongzi123 😭🩷THANK U!! these are SOOO cutieful I truly love BokuAka ☹️🫨🩷🩷🩷 if anypony ever wants ig bkak edits btw. lmk. thanksk
AKAASHI 😭🩷🫶 he's so handsome gorgeous stunning perfect Omfg first edit ur so real for that. Thank u. these were life changing moments. also the second one.. i haven't appreciated the old anime keiji in soo long Omfg ☹️☹️ also friend i think the third edit + art skit links r the same But i understand. HE'S. HI HANDSOME. I am very rich and can provide 4 u Plz DM me ❤️. THANK U VERY MUCH!!! AKAASHI 😭🩷
here are some edits from me to U.
(link) Liek my fav keiji edit i have. ohman. KEIJI. and another keiji link
Bokuto link!! another kou link!!
OH. and a zoro link... this was one of the ones i couldn't find earlier. every time i see this art it's like i'm being flung through a 20th story window ohmyogod. i found a few zoros if u wantsies!! meowwoww
#🧾nia.answers#<3 lene#if i find any beautiful edits i will send them 2 u. bookmarking ig edits is literally a hobby of mine at this point#its bad bc i dont organize them and i just deleted all my old unupdated highlights so IDK where anything is 😮💨😮💨#if anyone needs satosugu or akeshu pls lmk. or one piece. or#i refuse to reinstall tiktok after all this time though so if i ever feel an urge 4 edits. i will ask u. LOL#I think everybody should send me bokuaka content solo or ship Always btw. Wink. nudge. gets on my knees and begs
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help, an annoying teenager joined a discord server im active in
#joos yaps#delete later#'yeah i dont think most people REALLY have adhd.' my guy where do you get this info from. on what basis. tiktok?#nearly unprompted. who asked. and even if - who give a shit#its not a big deal but its a very good little annoyance to get me thinking about a 5 page reply when i want to go to sleep#pushes the exact right buttons#i sent a short inquisitive reply initially but im gonna delete it. i dont need to argue about this with a stranger#hopefully he leaves in a few days when he gets tired of google translating all the dutch
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help i’m having deep thoughts at 12am i should be asleep
#this is what i get for sleeping all day#in my defence i had a migraine#also currently thinking about the use of the word consume and how it’s meaning has changed in regards to art#people describe media as being consumed but i feel this disregards any interaction the viewer has with the art#you consume tiktoks: they take up a minuet of attention and are then gone#you read books and watch film and veiw visual art#because at its core art is about the audiences interactions with the artists concept#and consuming something fully disregards any value it has as art and turns it into something to be viewed once#and then deleted from its platform forever#i’m looking at you disney for removing willow tv after it was only out 3 months#we need more passion in art#and less creating quantity to be consumed#i don’t care how many views something gets i care that it means something#either to the viewer or the people who put everything into creating it#anyway
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I feel like when lou said Tim asked him to come in for a 4-episode arc it was like very early on before the story developed (or Tim remembered how things work in the og and that he actually needs to give screen time to more than one or two characters and balance it out and can't rush this story lol) and now, with how we left off in 7x05 (with bucktommy clearly into each other and starting something) and 7x06 being hopefully more madney focused as it should be lol, and with the shit lou's saying (about how we'll love Tommy more after 7x06, and the saucy events, among other things??)
now it just wouldn't make sense narratively to end it anytime soon imo so tommy has to stick around at least until the end of the season
#just my ramblings#might delete lol#idk ive been thinking about it for like 2 days#since that lous cameo came out lol#bc i need lou to stay pls#i just keep seeing people talk about (mostly on tiktok) how he'll be gone soon and like??#whether you like him and bucktommy or not - it just wouldn't make sense??#and don't we want buck to happy for a little while longer 😫#(for the record I want buddie too but let's not kid ourselves that it's happening this season 🤣)#if they randomly end it for no reason that's just lazy writing lol#bucktommy
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Say what you will about the flaws of tumblrs tag filtering system but at least it doesn’t actively work to show you things that trigger/upset you
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