#i could totally go into this more though
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:) hello! :D hope you have a nice day and absolutely do not think of the possibility of one of the last story cards being of silver! and that his groovy will very probably be crying!!! THERE'S SO MANY CRYING PEOPLE IN STORY CARDS LATELY!!! SPECIALLY LIGHT USERS!! I AM!!! SCARED!!!! bc so far we got Lilia and Sebek in the beginning book 7.... so at the end.... so we're missing story Silver... and Malleus is the one with less cards, so they might add one for him... but... the tears... ego.... THE TEARS!!!! EGOOOO!! (LOVE YOUR ART BTW EVERYTIME I GET A NOTIF FROM YOUR BLOG I RUN HERE TO SEE!)
(thank you! 💚💜💚)
YES I am ALSO like...90-95% convinced that we're going to be getting a story card for Silver once we wrap around back to diasomnia. 👀 especially because the way things are going, Silver will be the only character whose dream we haven't seen -- yet???? -- and that just. y'know. makes me wonder!
although I do think it would be VERY funny if he got a story card and the groovy was just "regular Silver except with one beautiful single crystal tear". this is actually a lot coming from him.
(he used up all his emotion yelling at a baby that one time, there's none left for a proper groovy-level cry.)
#art#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 10 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 10 spoilers#maybe not quite that far but just in case we'll go with the latest out as of now#i would absolutely love some more expressions for silver though#i saw someone point out once that he only has one smiling/happy animation and now i can't unsee it#LET HIM SMILE MORE#anyway my personal dipping-deep-into-speculation theory is that if we do get his dream and a story card from it#i'm leaning towards thinking it might be some kind of au where lilia never adopted him (and/or mel was never killed?)#because of how absolutely and intensely he was convinced that lilia MUST hate him and blame him for everything that happened#and while sebek punched some sense into him at the time i could see silver's wish being some kind of 'they'd be better off without me' thin#(plus blonde silver would be different enough to justify the card probably)#idk they might go in a TOTALLY different direction but that's where my thoughts are at the moment!#there's gotta be some kind of resolution between lilia and silver at some point at least#i'm just still holding out for someone to actually say the words 'silver vanrouge' please it is all i want
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I know this is just a silly bad quality random screencap of a screencap that I found on facebook lol, BUT it's a succinct enough image to easily describe the concept in a quick/accessible way hopefully :
-
(and of course, feel free to elaborate in tags, etc.! (especially elaborating about other senses as well.. can you "hear" in your mind just as well as you can "see"? taste? etc.) It's an interesting topic to me, as someone who's like a 4.5 at MOST lol. I'm curious what option will be the most common :0c )
#tumblr polls#hrmm... a little poll perhaps.. about a subject I find interesting.. since this image came across my facebook today#still really not feeling that well. no longer shaking violently and such but I still feel weird and weak much more than usual#They did say my markers for like infection or inflammation were elevated but that they werent sure of the cause so hopefully#it's nothing too serious. they did also say a lot of different things can cause that thing to be higher than normal but didn't go into spec#fics of what. maybe some of them are relatively benign or something. I still havent felt much back to normal since#I got really sick that one time though. I feel fine on and off but then little bouts of feeling weird and sick happen. hrmmm#ANYWAY.. looking for small ways to be productive. such as little doodles on evil ipad or editing game videos#or posting polls or cat pictures or some other like not very labor intensive things#I WISH I COULD FOCUS on writing HHRGGhh... I need to finish my game.. it would be so freeing.. a project that's been looming#over my head for like 5 years even though througouht that 5yrs I've probably spent a total of 3 months working on it lo.. ANYWAY#I still partially really cannot beleive that people CAN see stuff in their heads. There's always part of me that's thinking like. well mayb#e everyone DOES see the same exact thing but we just describe/conceptualize it so differently that we think we're talking about#different things when we're really not. But I have been assured by people I've talked to about it that they can GENUINELY really see#stuff in their heads like as vivid as an actual picture in real life or something. And the other senses are neat too. Like for exmaple I#can hear in my head much better than I can see imagery. I still CANNOT hear vividly like as if I were listening to actual music out loud..#but I think it's developed more than my sight. AND interesting how this varies the creative process. a friend I was talking to on the phone#said they write by literally just watching stuff play before them like a movie. where my process is COMPLETELY different. AND that affects#the content/what details we focus on as well as our individual styles of writing have differences that can be traced back to that.. hrmm
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full on feel like pjo tv s2 is not gonna hold up so they need to drag as much attention to the series as they can by using nico as a sock puppet w tsats2
im fully expecting the show to go the way of the movies. it doesnt help Sea of Monsters is almost unanimously the least favorite book of the first series. People frequently forget it even exists or what happens in it, especially more casual fans.
Heck, just look at how little fanfare the second season has gotten so far as compared to the build up to s1. I wouldn't be surprised if s2 totally flops. It would be a little funny.
#pjo#riordanverse#pjo tv#pjo tv crit#tsats 2#Anonymous#ask#im still sad theyre beating every dead horse in the franchise they can EXCEPT for the graphic novels#the poor graphic novels arent getting advertised AT ALL and the BoO one got cancelled#like. the graphic novels would actually be probably one of the best advertising avenues!#like. hey! you dont need to write a whole new book! just remind people of previous books and give them a way to refresh on it#and given how the first couple of graphic novels were a different artists i could totally see them doing a second version#just to make them all consistent. thatd make sense and be reasonable.#the show has also already kind of trapped itself in a corner in a couple of ways#for one they kind of screwed themselves over failing to plan for the actors. yknow. ageing.#Walker is already taller than like. most of the cast. Percy's gonna be TOWERING over Luke by TLO#i think the main trio is all like almost 16 already? and we're only on s2. its gonna be rough. they didnt think about it. they didnt plan.#also with how theyve been messing with plot and characterization theyre VERY quickly going to start running into hurdles#because they dont seem to understand the more you change earlier on. the less the later stuff will work without also needing change#because. it's dependent on what comes before. so we will very quickly be requiring either MASSIVE canon divergence or a lot of retcon#and retcon in the show is going to be VERY OBVIOUS#though i stand by itll be so funny if they solve too much too quickly in s2 just like the movies and it just ends on#''wait. crap. what are we going to do for s3 now. we solved too much too early. they have nothing to do''
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juvie buddies
#alek art#td duncan#td mal#total drama#total drama all stars#(if i want to get technical)#2024#duncan is around 15 here... mal is around 16#ive thought really hard about them these past few days . in my brain they actually knew each other and canon is different#duncan and mike got along really well. in juvie mal refused to speak to anyone about anything and would fight as many people as he could .#he wanted to stay in there and far away from home . they get roomed together and duncan is the first person who mal can talk to . he isnt#scared of him . he relates to him a lot . like -> wow we both act out for attention and people think we are terrible because of it#duncan being a mentally ill teenager seeing mal an also very mentally ill teenager thought 'i can fix him' . mike and duncan speak too here#i cant really see anyone else fronting besides those two . their brain was on lockdown and mike wanted out so bad . i see manitoba as a#gatekeeper so hed handle some sessions with their psych. i want to say they (duncan and mike) get moved to a psyche ward just because#i have more knowledge on being in one and how it goes ... but yeah i like duncan mal a lot . this art isnt ship whatsoever though 🙏 i dont#see them as a couple their dynamic is just better as friends imo#but anyways in all stars they obviously recognize each other but have an unspoken agreement not to say anything abt it#duncan is a known criminal but mike isnt like that . mike hadnt even told zoey about that part of his life . so duncan wanted to respect his#privacy -> then mal starts hurting people and he has to step in . mal isnt a good person by any means but i dont think he was that bad in#juvie . so duncan had to come to terms that his friend wasnt the same person he was years ago (in all stars duncan is ~18 and i think mike#is almost 20... so it had been a while since they last talked)#them getting each other like no other and being in pain because they couldnt really speak . i see them having a conversation still in moon#madness abt their past and history . god i just think abt them and their wasted potential wdym mike and duncan were in juvie together#duncan was in for trespassing or destruction of private property or something really dumb . mal fought his parent(s) and got in for assault#mal was already in when duncan was placed . and duncan was let out early on good behavior + his parents (dad) mostly did it to teach him a#lesson . wrong of them or otherwise . so mal was just kinda stuck there until they realized he was actually not right in the head . think he#knew abt their DID but was only diagnosed in juvie and had to go from there . tbh he shouldve been tried as an adult but td logic . doesnt#matter dw guys . mike gets the 'was put on random meds that made him go braindead' treatment bc that was me . post mental hospital abilify#had me messed up
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in the next mission impossible movie there better be a scene where the one (1) female agent they have has to seduce/flirt with a guy to get information out of him except when she tries, he makes it clear he’s not interested and says something implying he’s gay. so she walks away and into the comms tells the team it didn’t work because “i’m not his type.” then we get semi-frustrated team members telling her “well then become his type, we need the info” etc only for her to interrupt with “i think one of you boys will have a better chance.” then the comms go silent and it cuts to each team member’s reaction of “😳” and the “oh”s as they realize he’s gay. except when it cuts to ethan’s reaction, he’s already sauntering over to the guy and we just hear him say “i’m on it” and then we get scenes of ethan seducing the bad guy and he gets to gay kiss him. if this doesn’t happen i will riot
#ethan not even being phased and being so READY to go flirt with a guy for info lives in my brain rent free#his lil gay saunter over there too#i love my bisexual himbo#i also think they need to do this because every fucking time there is ONE femal agent and no more#and there’s always a scene where she has to seduce someone#it drives me insane#this is such a perfect solution#ik this would’ve worked better in the earlier movies during the 90s & 2000s when it was common for people to be like#‘gay??’👀 and not. fucking 2023 or whatever but STILL#it would be SO FUNNY#they could also switch it a bit and have the team totally unphased and when the femal agent says he’s gay someone else on the team just#immediately is like ‘ethan?’ and then ethan’s already going over and says ‘already on it’#or something like that where they had the back up plan in case he was gay#idk both are good#mines funnier though#anyway i’ll tweet time cruise if this doesn’t happen in 7 i s2g#mission impossible#ethan hunt#*
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💚 (NATM!)
”💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?”
Technically not my favorite character but soooo many people down play how deeply dramatic Octavius is and it’s the bane of my existence.
Frequently Jedediah is all silly Octavius is just isn’t. But in reality they are both like, equally silly. Equally sincere. Equally melodramatic. And we should let them be that
#He’s got a more subtle akward silliness that people kind of miss#We should not be glossing over all the “Even the glory of Rome came to an end 🥺😔✋” moments#Or the “It can sense fear 😳… apparently it can also hear me talking to myself 😬”#Me core for real#Moving onto my favorite character though a lot of people make ahk a little *to* silly I guess? Not quite the right word#It’s just like per the movies he is absolutely that silly but he’s also very put together? He was/is incredibly important and powerful#He’s as educated well spoken and regal as he is totally fucking unhinged lmaooooo#I could go on. I will not for everyone’s sake#Natm#thanks for the ask!
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if chibnall was the one writing this season you lot would be talking VERY differently
#anti rtd#oomfs ur so right#s14 is the kinda mid that people think his era was#and yet#you throw in that razzle dazzle written by rtd and all of a sudden there's no criticisms!#or worse somehow#is how its a polite and gentle reframing of chibs criticism#like with him it was hey he ate this singular one thing But I KNOW CHIBS IS BAD HE'S TERRIBLE DONT WORRY I KNOW IT#and with rtd its oh i disliked this nonsensical and objectively bad writing but ummm guys i lOVED LOVED everything else i swear#its soooooooooooooOOOOOOOOO#it must be studied#but i knew yous were a lost cause when we had 14/15 running around calling men hot bc yes totally something the doctor just does#not ooc at allllll#bc this is how we know the doctor is queer now guys#dont you know it#i have like a million other complaints i miss being like oh hey that was mid/bad and moved on with my life 😭😭#god i think 13 era killed me bc now i do care about u hypocritical losers#rip 15ruby i wish i cared and that you had any development#ncuti millie i would like to hang out with you though#15 maybe you'll cry less next season so that the emotional scenes have impact perhaps 🙏🏾🙏🏾#ramblings of an insomniac#god i just remembered the whole real mum antics#fuck i need to go i gotta go!!!!#ps the ncuti conundrum where he's the most charismatic dr in nuwho whilst also being the worst actor is driving me nuts#idk if its the characterisation or his lack of ability in creating that inner psychology that connective tissue between his louder acting#which he's great at btw!#idk maybe that one monologue in boom made me go yes okay here we goooo#but then every other moment has been like hmmmnnnmtgodhd okay whateve#i think he needed more acting prep before he got this role bc he's got Something he could be Great but the subtle stuff is lacking#sooo hoping he can grow into that but it's giving perfect actor wrong time.... and if ur white ur not allowed to agree with me shush go away
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OOH IDEA. if you ever get inspiration for it, you could edit Sonic's design in TMoSTH into his AD!AU design! (I can't draw for SHIT help)
hes just the same guy to me idk how i'd edit him. you absolutely can if you want though i dont know how to edit
#hes just more blue with. more blue around him help#ooo i could totally incorporate the chao theory stuff into his design though. gotta go back to that#<itd really just be the lines on his head. i have an older sonic design lying around somewhere that has them#sth#actually dead au#AWESOME idea though ty for suggesting :) now someone do it better than i did skdbfj
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transcription under the cut!
The worst ship chart ever.
Ship name: Loopdile
[insert very tiny math] Ages: 43 and 31? Age difference: 8?
Portrait of Odile with an eyebrow raised saying "I'm not telling." Name: Odile. Gender: trans woman (maybe nb but idrc rn). Sexuality: Aro lesbian.
Portrait of Loop with a finger raised saying "I'm not telling~" Name: Loop. Gender: Nonbinary (??? what is identity). Sexuality: Ace bi
General sliders. "Relationship starts quickly vs the slowest burn you can possibly imagine" is marked fairly close to slowly and trails off towards slow burn. "They'll be together forever vs They'll break up after 2 months tops" has two marks, one at 2 months and one really close to forever. "Cute couple vs dear god they're ugly" is marked a quarter slider away from cute. "Reasonably healthy and normal relationship vs They're dying and getting killed and hurt man" has a wide mark all the way from the halfway point to a quarter away from healthy. "Extremely popular ship vs literally no one ships this but me" is marked fairly close to no one.
Specific sliders. "Giddy and happy to be in love vs they just killed themselves 40 times in their head at the idea of being in love" has loop at died and odile fairly close to died. "The madoka vs the homura" has loop at homura and odile a third of the slider away. "Telling anyone who will listen about their partner vs rarely brings up that they're in a relationship" has loop a quarter away from telling anyone and odile fairly close to rarely. "eats and/or encourages a healthy diet vs eats dry instant noodles only" has loop at noodles and odile a third away from healthy. "crazy ass vs truck freak" has loop at crazy ass and odile fairly close to truck freak.
Tell me why your ship is interesting... go!
What draws them together? Odile is the only motherfucker that can handle them; Loop is weird and intriguing.
What stands in the way? Poor communication skills; Loop is clingy but Odile often needs space; Loop lashes out and self-isolates.
What are their good traits? They're both hilarious and dedicated to the bit; they're both devoted to their loved ones.
What makes them hopeless at romance? Odile is aro-spec and uninterested in romance; Loop both hates/fears and craves romance; Luckily they can just be something stranger!
Describe them with one trope: found family, deadpan x emotional, secret third thing, I'll protect you from yourself.
#suicide mention#these are today's headcanons... tomorrow? who knows.....#so. the weird sliders.#siffrin had a low grade crush on odile which. obviously didn't instantly come to fruition but it's not exactly a slow burn situation eithe?#and then during sasasap and isat loop's emotions about everything ever were. not doing great#they come out of canon a total mess#and odile's like ...i could fix them. NO WAIT IM NOT DOING THAT.#so again the thought is there and. a little more slowburn y this time. but only for a specific part of the dynamic#and then there's kinda a slow build of loop's new dynamics w everyone in the group?#and the thing with odile escalates into being a Thing#but again it's hard to call it slow burn bc there's no like. line to tip over into dating.#but it's not *instant* either#it's a snowball gaining speed downhill#ok next weird slider#oh yeah#they 'break up' fairly often as one of loop's 'this is 100% a joke and not my real feelings at all' bits#even though they're not dating and they don't actually want to break off whatever shit they do have going on#it's a way to express a need for change#BUT the whole family is in it for the long haul#and loop and odile's dynamic may shift over time but again. there's no 'breaking up' line#so they won't necessarily be [together?] forever but they will be together forever#and then it's. not an *unhealthy* relationship but it's not normal either lol#with a whole range of behaviors between 'genuinely helpful to each other' and 'lmao what the fuck guys'#ok those r the weird ones! the rest are obvious right. like ofc odile is closer to truck freak 🙄 but not entirely
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the headcanon that regis can hang from the ceiling to sleep or rest like a bat is funny on its own, but when i consider geralt and others in the hanza holding conversations with him like this, it’s made better by my understanding of this as just an advanced “neurodivergent sitting” technique
#in an irl au i suppose he could be doing an upside down yoga pose. that would fit irl au regis well. ugh#the better headcanon is angoulême walking in their room. going ‘[head nod up] cahir. where—‘#and cahir (not looking up) points to the ceiling on the other side of the room. also in total darkness btw no candles lit on that side#i imagine that when someone else walks to their room’s door and knocks. for example let’s say dandelion for instance#dandelion’s hardly a stranger but he did that thing where your friend stops hanging out with you because they’re busy with their gf#he knocks and immediately regis is suddenly sitting in bed like a normal person . and he put his eyeglasses on and pretended to read#oh hi dandelion i didnt recognize your footsteps#my… footsteps?#this is actually kind of bullshit though because the only person more talkative than dandelion at night is regis (angouleme close third)#so if dandelion ever wanted to discuss meaning of life at 2 am i know where he would go#sorry cahir. put a pillow over your ear#the elbow-high diaries#edit: no actually he would bother geralt with this#edit edit: no actually he and geralt were ‘on a break’ (unresolved tension) so he wouldn’t. but he would want to#angoulême goes to their room too often to chill and hang out#milva goes to their room and cahir and regis stand at attention like yes ma’am. what do you need#hi milva how are things (your ongoing mental health crisis)#if geralt walks in starts talking with regis. cahir leaves the room. ‘im going to um. check on the horses’#its 12 am. horses are sleeping. ? answer; he is being a considerate roommate. he had to share bunks before. he knows how It Is
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Ok game time which 3 series would you just DIE to get a run on ? I'm talking full creative control, can be as a writer or an artist + plotter if that suits your vibe best
My 3 are
Suicide Squad
Wonder Woman
Green Lantern Corps/Green Lanterns
(in that order)
#last one may wiggle around but i think thats mostly it. others i would want to do but if were talking full runs then this would be my picks#there are other things id ofc want to do though. a wonder girl (cassie) mini in addition to the ww run probably some superman stuff too#although idk him as well i do love him. maybe a mini there or even a prestige format book if i go crazy#would love to do a quick something with cass cain too ofc (me and the rest of this site lol). could probably figure out a plot to smth#longer if i thought abt it but would love to guest write a standalone issue or two for an ongoing of hers#what else would i want to do.... the sui sq and wondy are rlly the big ones bc ive thought abt that the most. glc ive thought about too but#to a bit less of an extent. ooh there was that bleez mini i plotted out during lunch once last year. think i had some sketches laying around#for that too.#who else would i do.... those are rlly the main ones atm. books i would write vs books i would read are definitely different though. there#are some pitches i would throw out but wouldnt know how to write at all i just know it could be done good somehow. like ik nothing abt#aquaman but i think its possible a wonder woman/aquaman story could slap#OR NO A WONDER WOMAN & SUPERMAN ONE I WAS JUST TALKING ABT THAT. dont call it that though ofc they should get a duo name in the same vein as#world's finest. and ofc 72848274 issues of bro time. anyways <33333333#also a not abt the rankings sui sq is higher than wondy which may seem crazy from a wondy blogger but 1. i do love them and 2. they need me#so much more. this subject is such an egofest for me bc ofc i think i could do everything perfect but like they need a good run soooooo bad#whereas id LOVE to do wondy but ik they would survive without me. anyways yeah <3#anyways on a totally unrelated not at all adjacent topic.... my askbox is always open btw 😘#also idk if my green lantern corps book would be called glc. may just hit the green lanterns vol. 2 bc who is stopping me really
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I'm trying to avoid getting spoiled so I haven't looked up what's happening in the Jp server's main story, but for my own sanity I need to ask; is the story at a point where we know whether Lilia will get better/survive his almost-empty magic reserves..? Was it a true death flag from the start or only a plot device for malleus' overblot....?
not yet! I do think they're going to get back to it eventually, but -- keeping it as low spoilers as possible -- there's been...let's just say a LOT going on in the meantime.
enjoy 7-6!!! :)
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers#i AM going to talk more about spoilers for a minute (i will try to keep it just up to 7-6 stuff though)#but i have. THEORIES.#my current hypothesis (based on absolutely nothing except vibes)#is that they're going to find the princess glow and use it to save lilia#via magic boost or...something. idk it was vaguely-defined enough they can handwave exactly how#because. look. they made a point of introducing this super powerful macguffin gemstone with magical dad-saving powers#and then never solidly established what happened to it#(twst? talk at length about something totally irrelevant that never comes up again? surely not)#but it would tie in very nicely with the rest of the parallels between silver and the knight of dawn#and i like how it would be sorta like...a little bit of meleanor coming back to save lilia#(again) (less violently this time)#my even-more-based-on-nothing theory is that crowley might have the princess glow and this might segue into whatever's going on with him#as always i could be completely wrong but i'm just. y'know. feeling it.#i'm still obsessing over that one line from episode 4 where azul was like 'oh yeah i totally know crowley's big secret'#which was most likely azul bullshitting but i'm still like IT'S GONNA COME BACK AAAAANY DAY NOW#(at this point no one will be more shocked than i) (the validation would be nice though)
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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I knew about the post concert depression but no one told me about the post concert constant feeling of AAAAAAAAAHHH that lasts days and makes everything much more bearable and beautiful and some sort of ethereal type of hope is restored into the world, or maybe it's just the "seeing your favourite band after first thinking that it would never happen and later spending many months waiting for it all the while fearing that it wouldn't happen after all because of circumstances outside my control or feeling like it was too beautiful and wonderful to be true so ofc it wouldn't come true" part of it all
#guys i love they might be giants. did you know about this#me days before the show: crying because i will see they might be giants#me days after the show: crying because i saw they might be giants#truth is that i didn't actually full on cry until yesterday evening though so once i was back home so it was all officially over#and it was time to just slow down and realize that oh well wow. so all that just happened. like for realsies#i also finally looked through my videos and my recording of the whole show (yes as an archivist freak who records audio from most concerts#i obviously had to record this one also. now i can listen to it again and again and be remided that i didn't dream it all up after all)#but yeah all this and now i'm supposed to move on and go back to my stupid daily life#like i didn't just have one of those real actual life experiences and moments of pure fun that other people generally get from time to time#and that i haven't had since idk even when a year and a half ago#thats the last time i consider truly amazing on a level somewhat comparable to this. but back to the show and the whole thing.#like this wouldn't have been quite as perfect if i didn't share that time with fellow fans / friends that i ended up attending the show wit#you don't realize how badly you've been wanting to be included in things and for people to be genuinely fond of you and like your company#until you get included and shown that fondness. like wow i'm allowed to have fun too after all. can it happen again someday please. anyway#i'm just glad that in midst of my big bad awful times i could have this truly amazing 10/10 time#and i guess it doesn't have to be the last such time right. even if it's easy to give into the feeling that it is#but ok anyway i'll get to that proper show recap later when i can think clearly again#and maybe more on that more personal side of it all too because well i have many more thoughts obviously#but whether i get to that in 3 days or 3 months is a mystery for now. just kind of a lot to think about once again#and my stupid baka life continues on also whether i like it or not so that has to be taken into consideration as well#time to think again about school that i'm so totally fully failing now with my two weeks long absence yayyy. its fine i'll figure it all out#goosepost
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Valicer In The Dark: "A Murder Shared Is A Murder Thirded" Outline!
Hello everyone -- I recently started work on the second Valicer In The Dark story, "A Murder Shared Is A Murder Thirded" (aka the one where they kill Bumby), and I thought it might be neat to share with you guys the outline I prepared for the story! Especially since I don't have any Sims 4 stuff to share on Wednesdays at the moment, thanks to the Chill Valicer Save file no longer functioning. :( I have plans for a successor, but it's going to take a little bit to get off the ground, so...
*shakes head* Anyway -- outline! My planning process for this story involved approaching it like it was an actual Blades In The Dark score -- complete with deciding on the type of plan the gang was going to use (and the detail they needed to provide), the loads they were going to have (and thus how much stuff they could actually carry), and doing actual rolls to figure out how the story would progress as they encountered various obstacles! (I, uh, may have purchased actual BITD-themed dice and a dice tray explicitly for this purpose. ^^;) However, I also took a moment to note down any "must-happen" moments in the fic first -- basically, any particularly important or cool bits that were going to occur no matter WHAT the dice said. Reason being, I've done some "rolling for something on the spot" fic-writing in the past with a friend, and I know how fucking frustrated I get whenever a dice roll ruins the cool thing that was supposed to happen in my head. Noting down the things I was DETERMINED to have happen and doing all the rolls BEFORE I actually started writing meant that I couldn't get angry at a good moment being ruined. Though actually, as you'll see, the dice were pretty kind to the trio in this score! I guess they wanted to make sure they succeeded in their task as much as I did. :) So, without further ado, here's the outline/score summary for "A Murder Shared Is A Murder Thirded!" Naturally, there will be spoilers for what happens in the fic, but I'll put most of it behind a cut, and you guys already know I have no care for spoiling my own stuff on here. XD
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Score: Infiltrate the Houndsditch Home For Wayward Youth in Charhollow, find proof of Bumby’s activities, and preferably kill the bastard
Plan Type: Stealth (I mean, there’s going to be an element of Assault, but first they have to get in)
Detail: Point of Infiltration – the back door into the basement kitchen of the house
Loads: Alice – Light; Victor – Light; Smiler – Light (each have three load slots)
Have To Happen Moments:
The gang successfully make it to Alice’s room so she can get her stuff; possible heartfelt moment when they see the picture of her family on her wall
The gang successfully finds Bumby’s ledger in his office (inside a safe stowed away in a hidden drawer of his desk; it’s generally opened via Lizzie’s key but can be picked)
Bumby shows up, and Alice reclaims Lizzie’s room key and blows him up
Gang successfully escapes with the ledger, and run into Smiler’s parents Matt and Carol as they head out of town; they’re taken back to the Ministry Of Joy for the Names (aka night)
Engagement Roll:
+1 d for sheer luck
+1 d for being bold or daring (they’re trying to expose a known philanthropist as a child pimp)
+1 d for exposing a vulnerability of the target (Dr. Bumby has written off Alice as lost in the city and hired a new dogsbody, AND he doesn’t think she’d ever get anyone to help her if she did tell anyone about his activities)
3d total
Result: 1, 2, 4 – Mixed result, risky position – they get in the back door without incident, but Alice’s replacement June comes into the kitchen as they’re preparing to head up the stairs
Score Rolls:
As per the above, trio encounters June coming into the kitchen shortly after their successful infiltration and have to get past her – Smiler immediately introduces themselves and explains that they were hoping to meet with Dr. Bumby to see if they could form a partnership, as they believe their alchemical prowess would help the man in his work (they are indeed cringing on the inside as they say this) – Sway, 2d – 6! June believes them and sends them up to see Dr. Bumby with the other two
Safely inside the house, Victor gets the idea for Alice to get her stuff from her room before they proceed further (having already suggested they grab it before they went); Alice agrees with this and they grab her things (1 load for Victor, who I picture as carrying the bag)
Head up the stairs to Bumby’s office, encounter one of the children (Abigail? Charlie?) in the upstairs hallway, who naturally recognizes Alice and wants to tell Dr. Bumby she’s back – Alice tries to tell them no, with Smiler backing her up by claiming they want to surprise him – Command, 3d (+1 for Smiler’s help, 1 stress for Smiler; +1 for pushing herself, 2 stress for Alice) – 5. The kid agrees not to go tell Dr. Bumby right now, but it’s clear that they will tell him the next time they see him… Start a “Bumby Shows Up” clock as a result, four pieces, none ticked so far
Into the office before Dr. Bumby shows up! Time to find that ledger… The trio split up – Alice examines the bookshelf, Victor checks Dr. Bumby’s desk, Smiler looks around for anything that might give them a clue as to where the ledger might be
Alice – Study, 2d (+1 for pushing herself, stress up to 4) – 6! She doesn’t find the ledger in the bookshelf, but she does find a book safe with some money in it – +1 Coin for the gang to take with them!
Victor: Study, 2d (+1 for pushing himself, 2 stress for Victor) – 5. Victor finds a secret drawer with a safe in it – but, well, unsurprisingly, it’s locked, and opening it will take a bit (+1 to the “Bumby Shows Up” clock, 3 segments left)
Smiler: Survey, 2d (+1 for pushing themselves, stress up to 3) – 6! While Victor finds the safe, Smiler notes the windows on the side of the office and determines that it would be safe for the group to exit via one of them if they had the appropriate means to do so – cue them going “good thing I brought some rope!” and setting it up for them to climb down (one load ticked for Smiler)
That safe looks like it’s important – shame it’s locked! Smiler offers to try and pick it (flashback to them finding some lockpicks in Elder Gutknecht’s library – as they have, or will have, the “Pack Rats” special ability as Shadows, I will let them squeak by with no stress for this – probably does count as load for them, so that’s a second slot ticked) as Alice and Victor keep watch for Bumby or other suspicious children – Tinker, 2d – 5. Smiler gets the safe open, but Alice hears what sounds like someone coming up the steps… (+1 to the “Bumby Shows Up” clock, 2 segments left)
However – safe is open, and there is indeed a ledger inside! A ledger that is very clearly about selling off children to pedos, and in fact contains some notes from Bumby about the work that he does...and how much Alice reminds him of Lizzie. Everyone is notably disgusted, and Alice angrily wishes that she could get that room key off him, but agrees that it’s better to try and escape. The ledger is thus shoved in the bag, and Victor closes up the safe and stores it back in the secret drawer, before the trio try to stealthily head down the rope leading outside –
Alice – Prowl, 1d – 6! Alice is shockingly stealthy and gets down like a fucking ghost
Victor – Prowl, 1d – 4. Victor is not so stealthy and hits the wall once – he doesn’t make THAT much noise, but it’s definitely noticeable… (+1 to the “Bumby Shows Up” clock, 1 segment left)
Smiler – Prowl, 1d (+1 for pushing themselves, stress up to 5) – 4. And Smiler is also not particularly stealthy, losing their balance as they get off the rope and falling over – just loud enough for someone to notice! (+1 to the “Bumby Shows Up” clock – full!)
And that someone is Bumby, who entered his office at just that moment, saw the rope hanging out of his window, and stuck his head outside to see Alice and two other people, one of whom is carrying a bag. He naturally assumes that she’s stolen SOMETHING from him (even if he doesn’t yet suspect it is his ledger) and starts yelling at her – Alice blasts him as an abomination and reveals that she knows exactly what he’s been doing. Bumby is first like “oh come on, who would believe–” And THEN it registers “wait, she’s here with two other people, SHIT SOMEONE BELIEVES HER” and scrambles out of the office himself on the rope. Fortune roll for how gracefully he gets down, 2d because I imagine he has decent Prowl to get kids to customers – 4. He gets down, but like Smiler he lands badly and is off-balance for a bit –
And Alice, seeing an opportunity, darts in and grabs his watch-chain, ripping Lizzie’s room key off it, while shoving the electroplasm bomb (tick one load for Alice) into his hands. As this is a must-win scene for the fanfic, this Skirmish, 2d roll is only to determine the consequences to her – 4. She gets the bomb in his hands before he can retaliate, and he goes up a treat...but unfortunately, poor June has come out of the kitchen, attracted by the noise, and promptly starts screaming as Bumby goes up, forcing the trio to flee VERY FAST (Smiler yelling “sorry!” behind them) – they are not a crew yet, but they will start being one with 1 Heat on their tracker as a result!
However, score is officially a SUCCESS! :D The trio run until they’re sure they’re not being pursued, then take a moment to celebrate their victory, with Alice being very happy that she was indeed able to kill the bastard (even if she accidentally traumatized her replacement – she’ll want to make up for that later if she can). Talk then turns to getting the ledger to someone who will be able to publicize Bumby’s misdeeds – And then someone says “Smiler?” nearby, and Smiler recognizes their parents! They run over for hugs and introduce Matt and Carol Alton to their new friends. Matt and Carol are very nice and warmly greet Victor and Alice – Alice, feeling a little guilty, apologizes for getting Smiler into some trouble and preventing them from coming home sooner. Matt and Carol are confused, so the trio explain the Barkis situation and the whole “turns out he was a Spirit Warden and the Bluecoats think we murdered him” thing – And Matt and Carol go, “Oh! No, the actual Spirit Wardens confirmed he was an imposter who killed one of their own and stole their kit, and that his corpse showed signs of being very recently possessed before it burned, so you’re in the clear!” Victor, Alice, and Smiler are a bit “…” over this, as you might imagine. Carol jokes that, “oh come on, it’s not like you killed anyone else, right?” [significant silence] “...right?” Fortunately, this is when Victor hands over the ledger, with Alice and Smiler explaining a bit more about what just happened – after a look inside, Matt and Carol are like, “Oh, yeah, that murder was TOTALLY justified, good job.” They tell them that they can send it onto a reporter of their acquaintance, the lady who runs Publick Occurrences, and that Victor and Alice can stay the night in the Ministry of Joy if they want. As the trio have spent two days since the end of “Start At The Beginning...Sort Of” living in a house with no running water or heat, in one set of clothes, they are more than amendable to this suggestion, and the story probably ends with them on the way to the MOJ.
Post-Score Summary And XP:
Alice:
Stress level before downtime actions – 4
+1 Coin
XP:
2 for addressing a challenge with violence or coercion (commanding the kid, killing Bumby)
2 for expressing her beliefs (protecting the children) and background (she was the former dogsbody at Houndsditch!)
1 for – less struggling with and more indulging her vice (Obligation to the children of Houndsditch!)
Total: 5 – put 3 in the Insight XP tracker, 2 in the Prowess XP tracker (Alice wants Hunt and Finesse)
Victor:
Stress level before downtime actions – 2
XP:
1 for expressing his background (trade, he was the one to know to look for a ledger in the first place)
Total: 1 – put it in the Playbook XP tracker
Smiler:
Stress level before downtime actions – 5
XP:
2 for addressing challenges both with deception (talking their way past June) and technical skill (picking the lock on the safe)
1 for expressing their beliefs (taking Bumby down makes the world a little bit happier)
Total: 3 – put 2 in the Insight XP tracker, 1 in the Prowess XP tracker (Smiler wants Study and Finesse)
Downtime Activities:
Alice:
House Rule – if a score serves as indulging a vice for a character, that character automatically gets 1 stress knocked off the tracker at the end – stress down to 3
Train Insight, +1 XP in that tracker (Alice is working toward Hunt – maybe she gets pulled into a game of tag with some of the younger members of the cult XD)
Train Prowess, +1 XP in that tracker (Alice is also working toward Finesse – does some drawing)
Victor:
Train Playbook, +1 XP (Victor talks to some of the Whispers in the cult, starts getting excited about being one despite himself)
Train Resolve, +1 XP (Victor might as well work toward another Attune dot)
Smiler:
Indulge Pleasure Vice – 4, stress down to 1 (entertains themselves and their new friends with some songs on their guitar)
Train Prowess, +1 XP in that tracker (Smiler is working toward Finesse, and playing the guitar works with THAT too)
#valicer in the dark au#storybuilding#blades in the dark#corpse bride#alice madness returns#the smiler#valicer#this was actually INCREDIBLY fun#I had a blast coming up with obstacles for them and making the rolls#admittedly this MIGHT be because the dice were kind XD#we'll have to see how I handle straight-up failed rolls in future scores#and I admit there was a little light fudging in spots#like not having anyone push themselves on the Prowl roll because I WANTED partial successes/failures#to fill up the 'Bumby Shows Up' clock#because I wasn't going to end the fic without him dead#but it all worked out!#even if poor June ended up traumatized#sorry about that!#she will be less traumatized once she learns what her employer was like#and Alice will probably find a way to apologize for that because damn#she did not mean to give June nightmares#as you can see though the XP totals were NOT kind to Victor#the problem is that you have specific XP triggers in BITD#and him 'expressing his trade background' by going for the ledger was the only one I could justify#sorry Victor but this WAS a very Alice-focused score#you will get more chances to earn more XP later!#queued
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oughhhh five million articles with tiny fonts but it's a pdf so i cant increase the text size without zooming in and having to manually scroll side to side to read everything or just suffer with the small font because i can only use half my screen for reading because the other half of my screen for writing in my word doc my DETESTED
#i have One day to finish this goddamn assigbment thats worth like 1/3 of my grade and oughoughhhhh ive been too busy w my other tging#but at least i could make it sexology-adjacent. peace and love on planet professors who let me do whatever i want#unfortunately this assignment has been having me need to read so many articles and then half of them wont even work for my paper;;#this isso tragic.....#im too far to change my topic to smth easier though so im gonna power through it. luckily the whole thing isnt due today just#the introduction which will only be like maybe 8 pages total but oughh prof wants a lit review and lit reviews take me foreverrrrr#and it's turning out that a lot of the articles i saved for this aren't working out for me :( so now i have to go find and read more :(#sad!#oh well.... bye 4ever..... gonna use ublock to keep me from tumblr.com again. and discord. and maybe notion. im refusing to#get distracted this post is already a weak moment for me but i just love complaning so much....
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