#i consider my sister to be my caretaker at times but she has her own life she has a job and her own friends

[syncope-syndrome]

This is why I lowkey don't like the word "caretaker", or at least don't like how it's used as a catch-all, because the term implies a level of responsibility and familiarity that so many of these prompts don't... have room for? My point of view might also be skewered because of personal reasons, but, to me, Bob from Accounting hauling the hero over to his cubicle to stem the bleeding is not a caretaker in the way a bodyguard would be. Most of the people who are labeled as caretakers are only caretakers situationally, or are people forced to be caretakers in dire situations, so of course they have lives and other responsibilities outside of that, and of course they're not experts. Caretaking is a job and it's an exhausting one at that, and getting frustrated, tired, busy with other things, or not having the skills to match the job pushed upon you does not automatically make you "bad".

I would really like us to think critically about the implications of our collective idea of the "bad caretaker" trope, especially in regard to recent trends in whumpee tropes.

99.9% of the time, a "bad caretaker" is someone who is either untrained, unprepared, temperamental, impatient, or just disinclined to walk the whumpee through every step of non-whumped life like a golden retriever mama dog with a new puppy. In other words, a "bad caretaker" is someone who makes mistakes or has a life outside caretaking or is otherwise not a bottomless well of sympathy and patience.

Rarely have I seen a truly bad caretaker. Someone who is manipulative. Someone who exploits the whumpee's trauma behaviors rather than holding their hand and gently coddling them. Someone who acts maliciously in a way that puts their needs above the whumpees rather than in accidentally or just occasionally.

I'm not arguing that stuff like pouring antiseptic over an open wound is good caretaking. It's not. And it's little to negative help, so it definitely fits into that category, and I personally live for that shit. My issue is not that "bad" is applied to the untrained or unprepared. My issue is that that's all it's applied to. My issue is that we need to diversify the trope so it doesn't get skewed.

[wszczebrzyszynie]

Does Mikita know his biological parents at all? What are his feelings about them? I know he was more raised by his teacher but after she died why wouldn’t he go back home?

Those are some really good questions. I did my best trying to answer them as clear as possible without going off topic, but it didnt go as planned. Well i think its for the better. As always with oc things its under the read more

Mika does know his parents and siblings; Apolonia was his sisters governess at first after all, before becoming his, and later his guardian as well. He remembers his childhood home, but has very little feelings about it. When it comes to his relationship with his family, he just never felt especially close to them, especially after Apolonia became the most prominent person in his life. He doesnt like them or hate them, if anything, Mikita at the time of the story is generally forgetful about them. To him, it wasnt an important part of his life, so he just doesnt really bother with it. Hes cold, if anything. Its a consequence of his childhood isolation, both self inflicted and influenced by Apolonia; shes the most important person in his life because she was for the most part the only person in his life, and everything was tied back to her. I mentioned it before, but as cruel as it sounds Mikita never reflects back on it; i dont think hes able to be critical about his guardian-mother, nor does he consider her behaviour to be potentially abusive or even unhealthy in any way, even in the modern au

The love he had for her was one of the reasons he didnt want to go back to his family after her death. She was his caretaker after all, and he did feel safe with her, feeling closer to her friends and social circles than his own. The other reason was because it could prove... problematic. Apolonia was a part of this social artistic circle (that Eliza often engaged with; she and Apolonia were friends, to some degree), consisting of mostly writers, and considering the time and place, it was anti censorship and therefore anti tsarist. Some of them distributed books that were illegal, which is what got Apolonia arrested in the first place, and in the prison she fell ill, which later caused her death. Mikita always adored his mother and wanted to be a part of this, but he was too young to really do anything other than hanging out in the background while they talked. That being said, he was still raised in that enviroment and took a lot from it, especially ages 12-15. His identity was shaped by all of it; From his interests and beliefs, to even his names - neither Mikita or Nika are his legal names, and nor is his surname. He esentially became a completly new person. He was also very interested in reading everything his mother would give him, which did include illegal literature. That very thing is what got him expelled from school, something his parents never learned about. And thats just the tip of Mikas school experience. So when Apolonia died, and Mikita lost the only present adult in his life, he grasped at the opportunity to go with Eliza instead of coming back

[amemoryofwot]

Introducing our beautiful Aes Sedai ….

Esnaem Tumblragoran :)

(For her first name say it out loud, and I’ll take an extreme liberty making “agoran” a Malkieri suffix much like “nhald” is Taraboner and “ghan” is Cairhien)

And thank you to the 750 (!) people who voted! Let’s break it down!

We’ve already voted her into Malkieri heritage from our previous poll. From the top of this poll she was solidly voted into the Grey Ajah. The Ajahs corresponding to a lesser vote percentage were at a disadvantage due to the meta game of trying to vote her evil, but I’m happy she settled into a slightly less represented Ajah. She was Black for a good chunk of the time which lead to some of my favourite tags:

Age was a little trickier to assign, keeping in mind her Malkieri heritage needs her to be at least say, 50 to 60. So that vote percentage of a total lifespan doesn’t really make sense, so I think easiest thing is just to move that decimal place and make her 96 years old.

Personality wise she’s haughty about half again as much as she is serene which, yknow, fits.

Strength in the Power was a bit challenging as you all know that RJ’s wack leveling system puts Lanfear at level 1 and the highest, so MORE votes would make her weaker in this regard. Helpfully, the Thirteenth Repository has a power level chart that fits better here. If we round her up to Level 8, it makes her powerful enough to travel and puts her on par with such channellers as Verin, Alviarin, Alanna, Annoura, Meidani, and Seonid.

We did it everyone, we voted her to be TWENTY FIVE percent tits. Leading again to another favourite tag.

We voted her into the 6.3 percentile for height, which correlates to about 4’11 and a quarter (the quarter is very important) for the average woman. I looked up general weight range for this height and went with 45kg, which means she’s about 11kg of boobs so uh. Yeah. I tried looking up weight of breast size which I don’t think is even really a thing but the chart I found capped out at 1.5kg per H cup breast. Idk like I said before short and stacked. Fun fact the last screenshot I have of the early poll results show it took over 75 votes before anybody started voting for height which to me was even funnier than the bosom sweep.

She’s got about 5% vote for angreal so let’s give her five angreal of her very own, perhaps even some Malkieri artifacts she is preserving.

She has 8.5% vote for Warders, which is a challenge considering she’s Grey. To keep with the Ajah rules perhaps she only has one officially bonded Warder, but is caretaking a gaggle of aging Malkieri soldiers that are joked to be her Warders.

Most importantly, she has been voted about 21 pillowfriends. Another fun fact this is a higher number than confirmed pillowfriends and lesbians in WoT (I counted something like 18 from the wiki) so girl gets around.

And there you have her, Esnaem Tumblragoran, gilf Malkieri Sister of the Grey Ajah

[specialagentartemis]

Trick or treat! Tell me about your ace cavemen

hell yeah

the question of “what does sexuality look like in Paleolithic times, when the population was very low and dispersed, and it’s unlikely that property ownership or inheritance are factors to be concerned about?” is one that’s of interest to a lot of people, but there’s little imagination given to queerness that I’ve seen. What does being queer look like in this very, very different social setting?

Landownership is an incoherent concept here, and there’s very little distinction in material wealth to be kept private, and what clan you belong to is far more important than who your parents are directly. (I’ve also given my Ice Age community a consensus-based egalitarian decision-making system, so descent isn’t important in leadership either.) What are sexual norms in such a society?

So I’m thinking about Pendíkhia as ace-spectrum, though of course the language doesn’t exist and they don’t really conceptualize sexuality in terms of attraction and identity. There must always have been people who just… weren’t that interested in having sex, didn’t really desire it that much and preferred other types of relationships.

The “standard” normative relationship in this culture are committed pairs or small groups. You are born into one of three clans, and your whole clan is your family. Having sex with anyone born into the same clan you were is taboo, it’s incestuous. The clans are matrilocal; men move to join and live with their wives’ clan. Same-sex partners, meanwhile, are accepted as valuable alloparents; every adult in the clan helps raise the children, so having childless adults at any given time is valuable to help distribute the caretaking duty and make sure there are people to look after children and people to go off on hunting or gathering parties. Same-sex partners choose whose clan they live with based on 1) who has a pregnant sister, or a sister with an infant, who needs more support; or, if both or neither do, 2) the one with lower status within their own clan will tend to move to live with the partner of higher status within their clan. Women are encouraged to be trained as religious and medical specialists rather than men, to reduce the chance of these specialists leaving the clan. Some men may choose not to take a committed partner at all, in order to stay with their birth clan, if that is something they consider valuable to them. Summer is a time when all three clans get together and live together along the coast, a time of abundance and freedom, and unpartnered young adults are encouraged to have whatever sex they want (that doesn’t break incest taboos ofc) as a way of determining if they want to settle down and commit to any of them. (Nobody really conceptualizes romance as the root of partnership. Desire, affection, love, sure yeah absolutely. But romance as a category is just not… a thing they have.) Pendíkhia is an unpartnered adult who tried that the first summer she reached adulthood and realized she… doesn’t actually. Care. Or want to spend her time doing that, or committed to another person like that.

Kurrat meanwhile is expendable for human sacrifice partially because he isn’t interested in fucking and therefore unhelpful in preventing Neanderthal population collapse. What use are you then.

(Also partially my interest in sexuality and asexuality is a pointed refutation of a kind of baffling concept I’ve seen in MULTIPLE places—that people in the Ice Age didn’t know that sex led to babies. That they believed that pregnancy just Happened when the time was right. I find this… hard to believe.)

Also, writing asexual characters just kinda comes most naturally to me lol. I am not that interested in writing about sex. However the refutation of romance as a timeless and universal understanding IS intentional.

[crystalelemental]

Character Analysis - Carmine and Kieran

I have been trying to write something on this for the majority of the week and haven't been able to organize it in a way I like. So this will not be coherent, but since I've had my second go through the DLC story, I have...a lot more to say on Carmine and Kieran.

Seeking Strength Kieran's big focus by the end is on not being strong enough, and needing to become stronger than you. I think it's largely accepted that this is to defeat you, that he has it out for the protagonist. I disagree.

Consider why strength is important, and when it became clear. The first time Kieran mentions strength, it's in front of the ogre's cave. He talks about wanting to battle, thinking maybe that could impress the ogre. And he loses. Which is whatever, the ogre didn't show. But then it does. To you, and to his sister, but not to him. Internally, the connection is clear: the ogre doesn't trust me, because it sees me as weak.

This goes back even further, though. Think about your introduction to him. Carmine battles you to kick you out, and you win. Carmine's response here is interesting. She comments on everything, and actively makes fun of you if you use a not very effective attack, snarking that you must not know your type matchups after all. She oozes confidence and control, to excess. But when she loses, there's a bit of a fist shake, but rather than anger, she turns away and looks...sad. Losing upsets her, and while she bounces back, that moment suggests a deeper vulnerability and need to seem strong.

And to Kieran, she does. She's constantly in control, and by and large, he seems to follow her pace. If she asks him to do something, and by asks I mean tells, he generally follows through. And he saw someone beat her. There's someone stronger than his sister now. And that's interesting. I think there's a lot more to it, but I'll save that for a later section. For now, the point is, Kieran's always been focused on strength, because he admires Carmine's strength, and wants to be more like that.

I think this recontextualizes your final fight a bit, too. Carmine tells Kieran that he can't make Ogerpon go with him, she has her own will to choose. Kieran still insists he needs this battle, and it seems like the perception of this is "he's ignoring it." But I don't think he is. At this point, he's lost multiple times, each time thinking it's his lack of strength that resulted in him not getting what he wanted. It was, at first, to meet and befriend the ogre. And yeah, he'd still like to. He's still trying, given the stipulations of the fight. But he's also fighting for his sense of self-worth. He feels he's not strong enough, and that lack of strength is holding him back. He's seen his sister lose twice now, yet she's still confident. But he lost, and feels like he's losing more of what little he had to start with.

Belonging and Isolation Carmine's hostility toward outsiders is, as expressed, a matter of feeling like her hometown is becoming a tourist trap. I think what often gets missed in this is that Carmine herself is...fairly traditional. She cares about the customs of the village, the sanctity of the crystal pool, and the prominence of the Loyal Three. She even remarks that obviously she likes the three better, Kieran just likes the ogre because he's a ten year old boy and they're always into weird monster things. She considers integration with the village something important, and deep down, cares about it as a whole.

That's not to say she gets along with everyone. The Caretaker seems more than happy to make the conversion if it helps the town thrive, and Carmine actively disagrees with that. Her hostility is clear to us, and she makes her reason known, but it's not clear how much the villagers seem to understand this. They tend to treat Carmine's responses as part of an attitude problem, more than anything. The Caretaker is pre-emptive in calling out Carmine to get along with everyone. They know she's not happy about it, but expect her to just deal with it, and kinda treat her like they expect problems. Calling them the "Lousy Three" gets an almost exasperated comment about her attitude and a correction, like they fully expect her to be this way, and don't consider the why behind it.

By contrast, Kieran...successfully talks them into abandoning their ancient beliefs and understanding of the past in the course of a single afternoon.

For all the emphasis on Kieran seeming lonely, and I do believe he himself feels that way, Kieran...seems pretty well accepted by people. Think about how significant it is that they're willing to listen to him, with such seriousness, that they'll believe him when he says their understanding of history is wrong.

I think this plays into an interesting dichotomy with the siblings. On the one hand, Kieran is pretty well accepted, but genuinely lonely. On the other, Carmine seems perfectly fine being by herself, and doesn't seem to interface well with the others. But when you look at what they want? Kieran doesn't seem to care that he runs contrary to everything the village stands for. The ogre is cool, he likes that best, and sees little of interest or value in the three. He doesn't really care to integrate with the village. But Carmine does care, and isn't successful at it. By all accounts, she doesn't seem to have friends either. But when a new kid rolls in, and her brother takes an interest in them, she still focuses on him first.

Justice and Fairness Carmine is, at her core, pretty focused on what's right. Despite being more aligned with tradition in her village, when her grandfather reveals the truth, she's immediately furious on Ogerpon's behalf. She has no reservations about telling the rest of the village, until he appeals to her sense of reason, and she understands where the concern might be.

Carmine's reactive, but she's not a fool. She's pretty grounded, but in that way where I think it causes her to miss some things and seem unconcerned with feelings. But she does care about how people feel; quite a bit, really. When Kieran tries to give his ogre mask to you, Carmine intervenes and tells him not to. That's his favorite mask, and he shouldn't have to go without. Besides, practically speaking, we just buy the new kid a mask they like at the festival. It's pragmatic. But it also misses that Kieran was okay with sharing his mask for his friend. She cares about his feelings, enough to worry about him giving up something he cares about. But it's in a more...avoidant sense. More on that later.

By contrast, Kieran seems focused more on fairness. It doesn't matter the reason or intent, you left him out of what you knew. You didn't tell him about the ogre. You ran off with Carmine and pushed him aside, and that's not fair. He was your friend first, and he cared about the ogre first, and it isn't fair that suddenly that all doesn't matter. In that sense, he's very emotional, but doesn't really consider the rational cause of things. It's all about how he feels. This runs very counter to how Carmine is, being very emotional, but focusing more on the practical reason than how she's feeling.

I think you can also see this in how they express themselves. Kieran has no trouble opening up the instant you're on your own with him. He'll tell you all about how he thinks the ogre is cool, and that he was only scared of getting yelled at for going to the mountain. But Carmine legitimately struggles with it. She has a tough time being honest with people, and her sense of what being mean to someone is, boils down to "I didn't hit him." It's as if she doesn't really understand that her words can hurt people, or perhaps why someone would be hurt by them. The idea of "What you're saying was rude" is secondary to the practical outcome. If it's true, it doesn't matter how I say it. If it's what has to happen, it doesn't matter that it comes out as "Kiki, get out of here." Her mentality seems to be that she knows best, and is going to act on that, and there's no reason for people to be upset with her if she's right.

Sibling's Bond In one of the earliest scenes, we get a very good sense for the dynamic the siblings have. Kieran has taken an interest in the player, but barely speaks to them, turning his face away and not even listening to them. Carmine intervenes by explaining what he's thinking and asking for you to battle on his behalf. Kieran shies away, Carmine takes control, and Kieran is more than willing to cede that control to her. In this situation, it works out, as he gets to spend time with a new friend. It is the first, and only, time this dynamic works in their favor.

Every other instance of this particular dynamic coming into play hurts more than helps. When Carmine interrupts you talking about the ogre, and insists Kieran not find out, that's her assuming control like usual. Same with telling him to just leave the next morning. Kieran shies away from staying to help with the mask quest, rather than confront that someone else gets along better with Ogerpon. This is a dynamic they've had for a long while, and there is evidence to prove it.

"I hate when he gets like this." Carmine's clearly annoyed, but the phrasing evokes the sense that this isn't just something that happened before, it's happened often. And she's not happy about it. Kieran running off crying is the only time she really expresses anything truly negative about her brother, and it's telling of what she herself can't handle.

If Kieran's crying, it's because something's bothered him, and as the one who takes care of him, that feels like it's her fault. I talked about how Carmine is integrated with the beliefs of the village, if not its people, but there's a bit more to it. Carmine's generally apathetic about whether people like her, she's more concerned with being right, and doing right. Carmine cares about being a good person. And if her brother's throwing a fit, it's putting her in the position of the bad guy, and criticisms about being nice to him evoke an outrage. "It's not like I hit him" isn't just telling of her lack of awareness for how her words come across, it's indignation that her grandfather is implying she's at fault. Kieran crying is the one thing that she cannot tolerate.

And for Kieran, that makes it a very effective play. Because I keep going, I need to be clear: I am not saying Kieran is being manipulative. He's like ten, and highly emotional. He's not sitting around thinking that if he just cries, Carmine will do whatever he wants. He's just having an emotion, and Carmine has a reaction. It's the dynamic that turns this into a recurring feature of their relationship.

The behavioral term is Negative Reinforcement: an outcome that increases the chance of the behavior occurring in the future, by removing an aversive stimulus. When Kieran wants something, and it doesn't happen, he'll get emotional and cry. Carmine, feeling guilty or responsible, folds to make him stop. The initial aversive - not getting what he wants - is removed as a consequence of his crying, making it more likely to occur again. But the same is true for Carmine. She cannot stand that crying, so when she gives in, the crying stops, reinforcing capitulation.

It's a situation where neither is really at fault. They're both kids, and have that sibling dynamic. Older siblings take care of the younger ones. When you have an older sibling who feels responsible for the wellbeing of the younger, and cares deeply about taking care of them without knowing the difference between "helping them do it" and "doing it for them," you get Carmine. When you have a younger sibling who is particularly emotional and withdrawn alongside them, you get Kieran.

And the DLC is the breakdown of this dynamic.

Another really fun behavioral term: Extinction Burst. Extinction refers to when reinforcement is removed as a consequence of a behavior. Effectively, you decouple the behavior and what typically happens. An extinction burst is the oft emotional blowup that comes as a result of a behavior no longer meeting its typical, expected reinforcer. Think about when your computer won't turn on. How many times mashing the button does it take before you check the power cord? Do you stay calm during that or start cursing it out, maybe worrying that something's broken and desperately hoping it turns on if you just hit it right, or hold it long enough? That's the extinction burst in play.

That's what's going on with Kieran. He's finding his independence, but as part of that, he's learning what it means to have it. Sometimes things don't go your way, and you have to live with that. Even crying won't get the situation to change now, and he...hasn't figured out what else to do. Unintentionally, by handling things for him, Carmine's left him in a situation where he's unequipped to manage circumstance. All he can think is pushing for strength, and battling you over and over and over in hopes that this time, he'll win.

By contrast, Carmine's doing...really well. She adapts well, makes quick friends with the player as well, assumes a sort of leadership role in the quest, and demonstrates the reality that for all her bluster, she does care and is fairly well adjusted. She's had the experience to manage frustrations and setbacks, even if they're difficult, to the point that by the end of your last battle, she can earnestly smile and congratulate you. Her dynamic with you is thriving. And, for a while, your dynamic with Kieran was too, before his perception of inadequacy interferes. It's sad but worth noting: the happiest we see either of them is when they're away from each other.

I don't have any profound thoughts beyond this, nor guesses to how Indigo Disk might play out. But I think it's interesting how they managed to create a story with a compelling conflict, where these is no true "bad guy." I was initially kinda down on the DLC, I felt like the legendary stuff was kinda bland. But I've really come around on these two, and look forward to the next part.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.154 Didn't see it coming

Mama gives us quick hugs when we arrive, then rushes upstairs to get back on grandma duty. Alessia has never been sensitive, so I'm not surprised she isn't trying to help Mama during her time of need. I hope, at some point, she'll start considering others' feelings and needs before her own. I know better than anyone how important fitness is, but I haven't done my morning yoga in weeks, and I go for a jog when I can. She's not a child anymore. She can't stay in the pool all day while Mama takes care of everything. What will she do when Mama's gone? Instead of dumping the responsibility on her, she needs to learn how to do motherhood and get those trade secrets from an OG while she can.

Since Desiree hadn't met her cousins yet, and the point of this visit is to spend time with Mama, I take her upstairs to get acquainted. She doesn't know who they are or what she's doing in this house, but she seems to enjoy the coos and babbles from the other babies. Breanna is chilling on the play mat, so I set Desi in the empty crib, and for once she doesn't fight or cry. She actually smiles. Is she communicating with her cousins? Perhaps this is the beginning of a beautiful alliance. Mama asks me to watch them for a few moments while she tends the garden, so of course I agree. There's an odd calm in the room. I don't think I've ever been around when all three triplets were satisfied. Grandmas are so magical, I tell ya. I take a moment and gaze at them. Just like Des, they are getting too big too fast. Bre and Arvin might look like their no-good daddy, but they sure are beautiful. Lex is Alessia's mini me. Did she name him that because it sounds like her name?

We didn't eat breakfast because I wanted to get to the house as soon as possible, so I go downstairs to put something on the grill. I don't know why, but I've been really into the grill lately. Maybe that whole man and fire thing has some truth in it. Mama had changed her clothes and hadn't made it to the garden yet, so we walk downstairs together. Well, I go down first and she follows, rather; she's a lot slower these days. As I head out the door, I tell her I'm going to put something on the grill. "Okay. I love you," she says. There's something a little extra warm and fuzzy in that one. Even though she says it all the time, it seems kind of odd for her to throw that in there, so I turn around to say it back. I expect to see her shining face, instead, I see the life oozing out of her.

I stand there for a moment, shocked by my mother's lifeless body on the floor. I did not see that one coming. Like, at all. I'm not ready! Why did it have to happen so soon?! I mean, I know "soon" is a construct of my own mind, and it's just her time, but still! Seeing that hurt. It really really hurts.

"LESS!!!"

The grim reaper shows up, looking like we interrupted his beach vacation or something, and I beg him to give her more time because she has four young grandchildren, and she is a full-time caretaker of three of them. My sister needs her. I plead. I implore. I grovel. When I'm out of reasons for him to revive her, he pulls out his tablet and scrolls through the names, taps on her profile when he sees it, and reads the details of her life. It must be an interesting read because he lets out a "hmmm" now and then, giving me hope he finds something that will convince him not to take her away.

"She's had quite a life," he said, making me even more hopeful. "But my hands are tied. She has no unfinished business. It's her time to go, dude."

Less finally comes in from outside as he tells me this, looking every bit as shocked as me. Sophia starts bawling immediately.

"Sorry for your loss, folks," the reaper says. "Now, if you would excuse me."

He gently side steps us, inching towards Mama's body, and a panic runs through me. I can't watch this. I can't watch him take away my mom's soul, so I rush to the living room to let him destroy what's left of our family.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for waiting until after opening gifts to confront my grandmother?

my (25f) mum (50f) experienced a severe psychotic mental break last winter. i ended up living with her and my siblings (seven, all younger than me) for the better part of 2023 to help take care of the house and kids AND support my mum financially, and only moved back out into my own place in november along with my partner, my 19yo sister, and my sister’s gf.

during my mum’s breakdown, my maternal grandmother completely took my mother’s side against me even in the midst of her delusions, disagreed with me when i tried to get her into a more intensive therapy program, and generally refused to acknowledge my role as a caretaker for my mum AND my siblings. when i told her i was worried about my siblings mental health and well-being after watching this happen to my mum, she spun my words and then told my my mum that i thought she was a danger to her kids, something i never said. it hurt a lot and seriously damaged our relationship, and she never apologized to me for it.

now, the holidays have finally rolled around, much to my dread. i avoid celebrating family holidays as much as i can, since after a childhood full of trauma, i’m not fond of them. our little household have planned a small winter solstice celebration for the four of us and a few other siblings who can attend, and that’s basically enough holiday for me. but my grandmother wanted to hold an extended family dinner, and invited me and my partner specifically. i decided i’d go. i also knew she’d be getting both of us gifts, so i got her something in return.

the day before, however, i found out some really horrible information about other family members - without going into detail, it involved sexual abuse, and the abuser has been allowed to attend all of our family get togethers despite my grandmother knowing what he’d done. i was horrified, and i blame my grandmother for allowing him to attend functions where my young siblings will be. i’m not the best at handling conflict, so i froze up significantly and was not sure how to approach this. the abuser had already left the holiday dinner when i arrived, which is good, because i probably would’ve started a verbal-and-maybe-violent altercation with him. (it wouldn’t be the first time. again, i’m not the best at handling conflict. i’m in therapy about it.) instead, i was awkward and uncomfortable the whole dinner, and at the end of it when it was just me and my grandmother, i snapped at her. i think all the built up frustration ive had towards her since last year combined with this just exploded out, and i accused her of refusing to consider my siblings’ well-being our entire lives and prioritising her own kids instead, even when they’re the ones endangering us. she cried, i yelled that i would never be attending one of her family dinners again, and finally i stormed out and left with my partner.

after i got home, i had calmed down a bit and saw the gifts she’d gotten for me and my partner, and that’s the only time i’ve felt guilty about this. should i return the gifts she got me? was it wrong for me to wait until AFTER i’d opened our gifts to yell at her? maybe i shouldn’t have gone to the dinner at all.

What are these acronyms?

[the-courage-to-heal]

Is there a term for being assigned caretaker role but for friends? Like parentification for kids raising their siblings but being slapped with that label by peer "friends" or people who feel the need to be taken care of by those they consider their best friend? I knew someone who did that to me and after I was like "I love X she's like my daughter!" but then took it literally and kept calling me her "group mom" and said I had to look after her and be a big sister to her.

Hi I’m going to be quoting this article link here

What you’re describing sounds like a codependent friendship. You are not in a place of parental responsibility for any of your friends and that’s an unfair burden to place on you. Often people who find themselves in these sort of friend groups may have fulfilled a parental role in their own family. These cycles often perpetuate themselves. I hope this article helps you to make sense of what you’re experiencing!

What is a Codependent Friendship?

Codependency in friendship is characterized by an overly persistent reliance on one another. There will always be both taker and giver roles in a codependent friendship. The taker may need emotional support from the giver, while the giver might, in turn, get a much-needed self-esteem boost or a feeling of importance from their role in the friendship.

Signs of Codependency in Friendships

Ultimately, codependent relationships are unhealthy and toxic for both parties involved. Boundaries tend to be blurred in codependent friendships, and it’s common for both people to lose their sense of self as the friendship becomes more intertwined on all levels.

While not all unhealthy relationships are codependent, there are some telltale signs that codependency might be something you’re dealing with.

1. One person is always trying to “fix” the other’s problems

It’s common in codependent friendships for the person playing the giver role to always feel a deep sense of responsibility towards the taker.

Givers often want to fix problems, which can come at a price. The cost sometimes can even cause the giver pain as they spend exorbitant amounts of time, energy, and sometimes even money helping the taker.

2. One person needs to be rescued

In any relationship, it’s important to be willing to help someone you care about. It’s equally as important to be able to accept help if it’s coming from a good place. However, in a codependent friendship, there won’t be any reciprocation aspect, so one person is constantly giving to the other, despite knowing that if and when they themselves need help, their partner won’t be capable of returning the favor.

3. One person has anxiety or fears about the relationship

Takers may experience feelings of anxiety when their friend is not around or can’t spend time with them. They may start overthinking and obsessing over a fear that the relationship might end. Because of this, takers may become self-conscious that their friend might not want to spend time with them.

4. One or both people experience a feeling of burnout

Eventually, someone is going to feel the sensation of emotional burnout after being in a codependent relationship. The cyclical, repetitive taking and giving can only last so long. Particularly for the person in the giver role, the cycle can be exhausting, depleting a little bit more of their energy and happiness every time they engage until they get to the point that they have nothing left to give (to themself or their friend).

5. One or both people heavily rely and depend on the friendship

Being comfortable in a relationship is great, but when one or both of you become so dependent on the other person you can’t function alone any longer, it’s unhealthy. Though the roles are different, codependency can still have a dramatic impact on both the giver’s and the taker’s psyches.

6. Both people tend to be upset at the same time

It might sound a little strange, but it’s very common for people in codependent relationships to experience shared emotions. You may take on feelings of duress, stress, anger, or even happiness based on how your friend is feeling. Rather than having individual, personal reactions to situations or experiences, people in codependent friendships often find their mood is easily dictated by their friends’ moods.

7. Individual choices aren’t common

Not only do codependent friends tend to take on one another’s emotions, but they also might find it difficult to make their own choices when they’re together. Further, they might stifle their own needs and can even have a sense of guilt if they try to establish independence from their friend.

8. Opinions are streamlined

Just as it can be difficult to make individual decisions and choices in a codependent friendship, expressing opinions can be equally as hard. For people who have a codependent friend, it might feel easier to just go along with what the friend thinks or feels rather than risk any source of tension in the friendship by disagreeing or expressing individual opinions.

9. The relationship is draining on one or both people

A codependent friendship can be exhausting for both people involved. It can suck all the life out of you. These unhealthy relationships often leave little time to focus on anything other than that specific friendship. The relationship can become draining and taxing, both mentally and physically, resulting in a lack of energy and time to put into other aspects of life.

10. One person’s needs come first

This might be one of the most obvious signs of codependency in friendship. If one person is continuously putting the other’s needs before their own, there’s a good chance you’re dealing with a codependent friendship.

11. Jealousy is common

Jealousy is a common theme in a lot of codependent friendships. It makes sense that if someone is overly dependent on a friend, it can be difficult for them to accept that person bonding or becoming close with someone else outside the friendship.

12. The relationship has high expectations or obligations

The expectations placed on the giver in a codependent relationship can be daunting. The dysfunction in the friendship may result in one person being expected to sacrifice and give anything and everything to the person who fills the taker role.

13. There’s a high level of emotional need

Codependent friendships often involve incredible levels of emotional dependency between both people. Essentially, though it may not be obvious to those in the relationship, codependency generally involves two people using each other to get what they need emotionally.

14. One person is always giving, while the other is always taking

A hallmark sign of a codependent friendship is they’re strikingly one-sided. As we’ve seen through the roles that are played (we have a giver and a taker), codependency depends on that very thing — one person giving while the other takes. The roles may not ever be reversed, meaning whoever is the giver may rarely, if ever, get their own needs fulfilled in the relationship.

15. Outside friends are cut off

Codependent friendships rely on strict roles that are already being filled. The result can be a very closed-off circle of friends. Because the taker relies on sympathy and care they get, and the giver likely thrives on the power they feel as the caretaker, it’s unlikely that anyone else would be welcomed into the cycle.

16. The relationship feels scripted

The roles in a codependent relationship are stringent and unwavering. As a result, the friendship can start to feel like it’s scripted, playing out the same scenario with the same outcome day after day.

17. One person typically feels used

It’s very common for one person in a codependent friendship to feel used. Whether that’s you or the other party, the feeling can become exhausting.

18. One or both people is inauthentic in the relationship

Authenticity is important in any friendship, but in codependent relationships, one person often feels like they’re hiding or stifling their true self. By ignoring their authentic self, it can be easier to fill their role in the relationship without having to express opinions, feelings, or reactions to situations and events.

19. A distorted sense of reality is present

Because codependency perpetuates a cycle of unhealthy patterns, friendships can end up offering a distorted sense of reality. The giver can internalize a sense of self-importance and worth as they rescue the taker over and over. Likewise, the taker can fulfill their need to be wanted and taken care of.

20. One person in the relationship fills the “decision-making” role

Most takers in a codependent friendship rely heavily on the giver to make virtually all major decisions for them. It can be an incredible sense of stress and may weigh heavily on the giver, especially if things don’t pan out and the taker has someone to blame.

How to Overcome a Codependent Friendship

If you or someone you care about is in a codependent friendship, there’s good news. Regardless of who fills which role, you can learn how to stop being codependent in your friendship.

If your friend is codependent. If you realize that a friend is codependent on you, use the following coping strategies to alter the course of the friendship and develop healthy interactions.

Look back at the history of the friendship

Looking back at your own history can help you determine where in life you developed the need to be a fixer. This knowledge can be a game changer. Studies show that people who end up in adult codependent relationships often come from difficult family life. It’s not uncommon to have more than one codependent relationship, so taking the time to go through this process is likely to help you in numerous aspects of your life.

Put yourself first

It might feel unnatural initially, but learning to put yourself first is incredibly powerful. Setting healthy friendship boundaries and then reinforcing them means that you’ll begin to feel comfortable expressing your own needs, wants, and opinions.

[albinocapybara]

Finally after being stumped on a name for so long, the LeshyCat children concept is here, first, of course, some info on the parents :)

(Btw im not a native english speaker)

If you have any questions about them or my other headcanons feel free to ask too!

How they met: Due to his injuries making it extremely difficult for him to adjust to his new life in the cult (let alone how he would now have to learn how to live with a mortal body again) on his own, the Yellow Cat (who i will be referring to as "Amare" from now on) was assigned as his caretaker to help him deal with the necessities that came with being a mortal again (sleep, water, physical activities and so on) on top of the problems that came with his injury. While Leshy at first felt insulted by this treatment (the whole "i was a god i can do this without the help of some mortal yada yada" thing), he soon realized it was for the better (while also realizing his feelings for Amare :3).

Leshy: Freed from Purgatory in the cult around 100-ish years after his death and 15 years after Narinder was overthrown by The Lamb. All his high priests and his witness (Amdusias, Valefar, Barbatos and Agares) had passed away before his arrival, making the former and current gods of death the only "familiar" figures in the cult (they both changed so much after their last encounters), although he still avoided both of them most of the time (Narinder because of his conflicting thoughts about the older brother, and The Lamb somewhat out of anger at them but mostly fear due to how traumatic Purgatory was for him), but dont worry they eventually made amends along with the rest of the bishops :). Also became friends with bat follower but she isnt relevant for this post

Amare (the Yellow Cat): Rescued from being sacrificed to the dead bishop of chaos in Darkwood after followers of the Old Faith killed everyone else from his village, works as a farmer in the cult. He was the only follower (aside from the first five followers of the cult, who are kept alive and act as advisors and friends for The Lamb) that knew of Leshy's past as an bishop, and though he still held resentment for the former god, The Lamb's seeming disposition to forgive him made the cat consider doing the same for him, volunteering to be his caretaker. Once their relationship was made official, he was given a golden skull necklace to ensure the two could stay by each other's side for eternity.

Now for the children hehe

They are twins (as ive mentioned in my other posts), a daughter named Camellia (Amare chose the name) and a son named (drumroll please im so proud of this name) Havoc! (Name chosen by Leshy of course).

They both have green moss-like fur from Leshy, and the head shape of a cat from Amare, but other than that their bodies are very distinct due to inheriting different parts from their parents

Havoc: His limbs and tail, as well as his longer whiskers, are from Amare, giving him a silhouette very similar to a cat, aside from the antler-like branches he got from Leshy, he also has two sets of eyes like Leshy used to have once, ironically though, he has rather poor eyesight, needing glasses to see things that are a bit too far. Despite his name he is actually pretty calm and enjoys the peacefulness of the cult, though this doesnt mean he is opposed to some occasional mischief, specially with his sister. Wants to help with teaching when he becomes of age (also im thinking about the idea of having him figure himself out as transfem but thats for another time)

Camellia: her limbs and tail, being from Leshy, are quite a bit longer and thicker than her brother's, giving her a broader and taller silhouette, as well as making her quite a bit stronger physically, she also has only one set of eyes and shorter whiskers than her brother, as well as no branch antlers. Is a very active person, playing with other kids and sometimes helping adults with tasks that wouldnt risk injuring her (most of the time they dont let her though). Also loves doing pranks and other forms of tomfoolery around the cult along with her brother. She is also very protective of him, getting into multiple fights with kids (and a drunk adult one time) who pick on him (aka bullies). Wants to follow her parent's job of farming when she comes of age.

[treehuggerthegreat]

something i really need to get off my chest even if i just post this privately is That i really dislike ‘caretakers’ in whump writing. or ‘whumper’ i feel like it makes a character (even if they’re just a hypothetical one) feel very 1 dimensional and it makes me so OKAY JUST HEAR ME OUT!!! whumpee i don’t mind much, it makes the prompt or what your talking about a little clearer. But it feels like it’s putting it into a box and making sort of roles which makes it feel less like a prompt and more like we’re in an omega verse fandom and i mean this really lovingly and affectionately and no hate to any of yall. I have a vast amount of characters and i write stories and books and I can say with out a shadow of a doubt, not ONE of them fall under ‘whumper’ or ‘caretaker’ because i develop them as their own individual character. Not even my antagonist are ‘whumpers’

So one of my main antagonists literally burns cigarettes on the MC and abuses the MC. Tries to kill her on her 18th birthday. Shes her mom, and the main character PHYSICALLY cannot leave that situation with out getting the authorities involved until she turns 18. Mom sounds like an ass, she beats ‘whumpee’ up! why would i NEVER call her a whumper? because she’s a whumpee by that logic. Her mom was extremely emotionally abusive, and half the time not fully there. Her shitty ass dad got murdered in front of her when she was just a kid. but Her mom isn’t a whumper either, because she too would be considered a whumpee. She was a world renowned flapper girl, everyone loved her. she LIVED for the fame and her face in newspapers. But behind the scenes she was actively ignoring her distant parents as they continued to try and marry her off. She was then forced into the marriage when she got pregnant with the guy (much so against her will which is why she killed him.) and ever since she’s been delusional and not fully there. It’s generational abuse.

more ramble under the cut + extra clarification on what I’m trying to say

okay but that’s just generational abuse right? There are other whumpers in the real world! Yeah i guess there’s sadists and serial killers, but like, there’s SOOOO much more guys.

I have a mini antagonist, he’s in highschool and he’s meant to be the toxic narcissistic ex of one of my characters. But he’s falling apart trying to get attention, he’s not fully aware of the damage he IS doing. Ass he may be but again behind the scenes he’s constantly fighting with his dad who refuses to do anything around the house and who is also transphobic (she’s bigender but i’ve been using he to make it less confusing right now) and now she has to take care of her little sister and act like a whole ass mom. As a sophomore. In high school. Not only that but her mom died, so she has to struggle with that. She’s just an annoying ass teenager, she doesn’t understand how to treat people or how she’s supposed to be handling what she’s dealing with. But getting attention and being liked at school? now that’s the shit. That’s like drugs for her. But to what lengths does she go to get that extra validation? He uses his boyfriend almost like an accessory. He’s not considerate of his feelings, and most likely doesn’t understand what a relationship is SUPPOSED to be.

Unless you’re making a sociopath character, which i LOVE a good sociopath character, you have to treat them like they also have humanity. Most of the time villains don’t just. Do shit to do it, they have some sort of background that lead up to this!!! And also even then with sociopaths they’re their own individual characters separate from the people they hurt!!! and also NONE of these are end all be alls and all characters must be developed this way!!!!

just my advice and stuff <3 i love all of you out there and i can understand why using certain roles and terms are the go to, and i’m not stopping you!!! i just really wanted to give my two cents so i can possibly help other writers!!!

[the-blossica-fan]

Greetings!

I wonder how the Reverse 1999 characters would be like as parents. My sister and I talked about it the other day. We thought that Kakania was the type that might bring her kid to work (like a mini therapist assistant who would hand her mirrors). I think Kakania is very friendly and her dynamic with Illich was wholesome so that came to mind.

With Shamane, we imagined him like a househusband who cooks really good food for his kids since his voicelines has a long tangent of biryani or chickpea soup. Since he got his arm made as not to scare the kids and because he is carefree, he is the fun parent who is overall 10/10 a good one.

Windsong and Vila are basically their current dynamics with the Rayashki children, Windsong is protective towards them but at the same time really awkward and anxious if she is being a good parent. Vila is a natural since she prepares them good food, teaches them, gentle, patient, understanding, and can basically make an entire village run on its own, 10/10 a good one.

Isolde...her as a mother? Considering her family situation it sounds kinda messy especially if she was to have a daughter.

I wonder what other headcannons you might have.

Hello there, comrade!! You seem new around here, so, nice to meet you!

I won't include the younger cast since I have a hard time picturing them as parents so I'll go over the adult/young adult part of the cast.

I have a hard time picturing Isolde as a mother, especially after what's going on in her family and her mental illness. The Dittarsdorf have always been prone to becoming insane or mildly insane, with or without the seance. It's hard being the one to break the chain, especially when you're such an important part to it, the last Dittarsdorf alive.

She wouldn't perform a seance on her daughter, and I'm quite ashamed to say it's not only because of the dangers of it, but because it's no longer needed. She and her diseased sister, as well as the entire female part of the Dittarsdorf have gone through it.

I can picture her as an okay caretaker, someone who doesn't have to take care of the child all the time or is theirs. Like an aunt. Her children would not have the happiest of childhoods, she is, after all, a mental patient with problems regarding her family. It's not recommended for her to take care of her own children.

For Shamane, he is the kind to take his children to hiking trips and around nature, teaching them how to take care of themselves around nature. He wouldn't do any sort of city work since he's more connected to nature, I can picture him going camping a lot.

His partner would have to get a job in the city though. Overall, he's a great father and a great life counselor. He's gone through a lot and he doesn't want his children to go through the same as him.

Tooth Fairy would also be an amazing mother, if only her job didn't steal so much of her time. She's awesome with children and teenagers, even young adults as we saw with Blonney, she's someone you can rely on and someone who will give her children unconditional love as well as life lessons.

She's a doctor, so she doesn't have a lot of free time, but she never misses a single important date for her kids, she's always there to support them and teach them to be better. She's also quite disciplinary, but lenient, and more of a fun easygoing mother than a strict one.

As for Madam Z, she's almost a similar cade to Tooth Fairy, but a lot more strict. Whether son or daughter, she always wants them to be on time and to tell her if they're going to go somewhere. She wants to keep her kids safe and wants them to grow to be disciplined properly.

She's not a rough mother, certainly, but she's just slightly strict. Her time is limited as well and since she can't be there all the time, she wants to make sure they're safe when she's not around.

A good mother, one that would always be there for her children but would also scold them thoroughly. Paired with Tooth Fairy, they'd be perfect mothers.

I also can't picture Centurion as a mother. Maybe she would settle down some time, but for now her gambling and getting-into-dangerous-situations addiction is not the best environment for a child.

She's an awesome and fun caretaker, but to be 24/7 taking care of a kid is too much for her. It's a shame to say she might not even want the responsibility at all. If she ended up settling and leaving behind that world, I might think she'd be a fun and lenient mother, but so far, I can see her as a cool mother's friend or aunt, not as a mother.

Zima is quite a complex case. He's certainly introverted and wouldn't go out a lot, but he's good at taking care of kids. If he had some, he would raise them to be a hermit like him, but he will be there all the time for them if they need him.

He wouldn't go outside to any party for them, but he would make his own at home so they can celebrate together, and would entirely support them if they want to go outside and be extroverted, as long as they're safe, he's happy if they're happy.

Good father, certainly. He might not be the most active, but he always covers emotional needs that every child needs and supports them like a good father. He's also not strict with time or with any habits (as long as they're not harmful), he just asks to let him know when they're coming back so he can have dinner.

I can see Kakania as the sort of mother that would always be bragging about her kid. It could be anything but she's so proud of them for it. She's a great mother, though she might not take them to her therapy sessions a lot unless she knows the patient is okay and it is a safe environment for both, her child and the patient.

So far, she seems suicidal (as someone who hasn't finished 1.9), so I'll consider it as something she managed to get over by the time she has a child.

She's incredibly supportive of any hobby or activity they might want to start making. Pursuing arts? Sure, she'll give the necessary supplies. Starting a business? She's the first customer!

She's always there for her child, and when they're going through their hardest moments, like we all do, she would be there all the time. She's a therapist, a psychiatrist, she knows how to deal with it.

Overall, an amazing mother in terms of mental health and emotional needs (Though this may change if she's paired with Isolde, she has to care for her mentally ill wife and a kid while also managing therapy sessions for her clients, it might be a bit too much. This is for a single mother scenario)

Tennant as a mother is quite hard to picture. She's a con woman, she doesn't settle down or commit to anything. I picture her to be a good step-mother for a teen or a young (8-13) kid, but to have the responsibility of taking care of her own children? No, not really.

She might take care of pets but that's a different sort of emotional and mental support. So, not so good of a mother, but a great step-mother (if she settles down, she might go for women with children)

Greta Hoffman... I don't see her as having children. Listen, she's a busy woman who doesn't seem to want to have children. However, she might end up adopting a teen (cough, cough, Marcus). Yes, I can't picture her taking care of a newborn or anything, but for a child-teen, I can see that.

She's an amazing counselor and supporting figure, a parental figure that stepped up to take care of someone. That is how I view Greta. An amazing mother, she's the type to say "straighten your back" a lot, it's something her kid will miss one day.

Oh and, yeah she adopts.

Getian is taking care of a bunch of birds I'm sorry to tell you this. He's more of a bird than a human, I can't see him with a human child but maybe with a bunch of eggs he'll take care of with his life.

Blonney is quite a situation. She's uh, like some sort of supportive but judgemental mother. She doesn't judge her kids! But their relationships and friends, yeah.

She didn't have a lot of support growing up so it marked her life a lot, she still tries to better herself as a mother every day, but it's hard when your own parents weren't there to support you.

She's always there to help, and it's noticeable she's struggling to be a good mother, it's quite a lot of pressure. I'd say she takes care of her child's health a lot, and would support them if they decide to practice sports, go into arts or theater.

She might be busy a lot, she's a filmmaker, a playwright and a director. She's always behind her doors writing or calling on her phone. She's just like her father in that regard, and she's trying her best not to be.

So far, a good mother, but she's struggling.

Jessica... Let's put it in a simple way. You see those cats that are taking care of their kittens but sometimes they forget them or accidentally hit them with something? That's her.

Not necessarily a bad mother, but not a good one either.

(Pair her with Blonney and you got a struggling pair. Neither had support when growing up so... Yeah maybe a dog is a good choice)

Finishing with Vila and Windsong. Yes.

After taking care of the Rayashki kids and watching them grow up, they wanted to have kids of their own and Lord, there's not a better word to describe them than amazing

Windsong may be struggling a little, much like Blonney, but with Vila by her side to guide her and the experience of Rayashki, she's able to better herself in that regard. She's an amazing mother, supporting any sort of weird hobby her kid may have, participating in any activity they require her to and even joining in to bond from time to time.

Vila is also amazing. She has a lot of experience and, while she's relaxed and lenient, she's a teacher and she teaches discipline and good manners to her kid as one should. She's not shy about participating in any activity (much like Windsong) and she gives them that push we all require when trying something new.

Overall, amazing mothers, you can never be mad at them because they're just perfect.

[beanghostprincess]

TW for chronic illnesses and body image issues/disphoria and infertility for some headcanons.

Lamikkaku anon here, I wanted to share some headcanons and thoughts about modern AU Lamikkaku because I think I've just come up with the most precious thing ever.

So, I think modern AU Lami would be cronically ill/have some health problems. (I was thinking about her being a survivor to childhood lung cancer that was caused by long term exposure to asbestos, since the Amber Lead Deasease seemed like it was referencing that. And therefore having long term health problems due to treatment)

It would affect her breathing and heart (cue Law deciding to become a cardiosurgeon to help people with similar problems) but also her body and personality as well. The steroids based treatments made her gain weight that she hardly lost, she has scars from various surgeries, and she became an introvert that struggles to meet new people. She feels guilty that she always made her parents worry and made Law miss out on many childhood experiences too, as he hardly saw his parents who were caretaking his sister and was mostly looked after by their godfather Corasan.

Cue my transfemm Ikkaku headcanon. She also struggles with acceptance and body immage issues, worrying about her appearence and not being "feminine enough", as well as some anger issues she develoeped due to tauning from others. I think she may also have issues with her family due to this. It contribuited in her being somewhat "hostile" when trying to meet new people and trusting them.

They met because of Law. Lami doesn't have many friends of her own so she hangs out in his friend group and meets Ikkaku. Its sorta of a love at first sight. Lami looks at Ikkaku and views her basically has a goddess: one with a flawless body, untouched by medical horrors, a sassy and sarcastic personality that sports a level of confidence that she can never have. And Ikkaku sees Lami as an angel: a kind, gentle person with such soft, and a heart of gold thats completely pure, cute ligneaments and a caring and amazing family that loves and supports her.

They start talking and getting close, opening up more to eachother, about their insecurities and fears. The topic of dating eventually comes up and both are very catious about it: Lami isn't sure about what she can give, her health problems are something she always saw as a burden, and she doesn't want to give this burden to anyone else. And Ikkaku thinks she would be awful for Lami, after all Lami is such a nice and kind person, Ikkaku considers herself far too brute to be good for her.

There is also another added thing... Lami can't have children. The treatment made her sterile, and its something she always knew but only really started grieving now. Part of her thinks this makes her an inadequate partner, a not good enough girlfriend (Bullshit, Lami is perfect and you know it) and Ikkaku also had mixed feelings about her own body functions, with transphobes harrassing her and saying shit like "ReAl WoMeN CaN GiVe BiRtH!!!" (Bullshit, I fucking hate this terf behaviour).

The two of them understand eachother deeply due to these things about themselves. Ikkaku never saw Lami's health as an obstacke, it just something that is part of her and makes her unique, and Lami doesn't give a shit about Ikkaku being trans, she loves her because of her personality and the way she is treated by her.

Eventually they do manage to start dating. Its a gradual process, but it doesn't matter because they have their love. They also protest and advocate for themselves, weather its trans/queer rights or better funding and medical treatments (insurance is a SCAM) and marriage equality in both cases.

Law couldn't be happier for her (he doesn't show it at all but he cries of happyness in a corner at least 5 times a day. Bepo calms him down) he also goes on double dates with them and [insert character you ship Law with].

And occasionally there are double dates with Penguin and Shachi as well (Penshachi and transmasc Penguin my beloved) but they have to be very carefull because if they mess something up Law will come after them with a weapon of mass destruction.

And Cora is so proud of them!!! His little girl finally finding confidence, loving her own skin, advocating for herself and all with the love of her life by her side. This man is so goddam happy you wont believe it!!! He gives Ikkaku his full blessing and some older transfolk advice (transmasc Corasan my beloved) he is already picturing their wedding, and he's crying about it. Someone get this man a tissue, or a blanket.

This is all so beautiful!! I've always loved Modern AUs but this one is especially soft. I love how they both have their own issues feeling loved but end up overcoming them together,,, Also, Cora would be the best father-in-law ever in the world. He's so. So happy. He loves Ikkaku so damn much-- And I think Law is concerned at first because he loves and trusts his friends a lot but whenever Lami and Ikkaku go on dates. Together. Alone. Law worries a lot in case something might happen. But Ikkaku is a sweetie with Lami and when Law realizes that everything is okay and the world isn't ending and nobody is dying he cries because he's just so so so relieved.

[rei-caldombra]

The time hath come! For a passionate post of one of my favorite series Demon Girl Next Door / Machikado Mazoku. (above image made by me)

Just wanna say right away that I adore this show and I am largely just bringing up positives. This is a gushing post that ended up being super long. And reminder that my writing isn’t meant to be all encompassing and describe the show in every detail. So if there’s something I mention about the show that intrigues you, you should check out the source material (and if I encouraged you to do that then I've succeeded!)! This will contain direct spoilers. I do not bring up every single aspect of the plot and characters, but I bring up many of them. Skip to the end if you just want to hear a short conclusion. 

DGND is incredibly dense despite how simple it seems on the surface. This show is so much more than just goofy wholesome fun. 

When it comes to stupid moe derpy characters, i think Shamiko is one of the best examples of this archetype. She has plenty of personality aside from that. Some stupid characters feel like they only exist to be stupid for gags. They genuinely don’t seem like they can function as a human being on their own, to the point of feeling like they could be offensive portrayals of mental retardation. 

But Shamiko is well rounded. She is not JUST a character who is dumb. Her lack of smarts and common sense does actually have some explanation too. You learn that the curse on Shamiko’s family has a physical effect as well. Shamiko spent most of her childhood in intensive care at a hospital, her physical issues exacerbated by the curse. And Shamiko was not just taking on her portion of the curse, her soul had chosen to take on Ryo’s portion of the curse as well. Before she awakened to her demon heritage, she wasn’t even able to walk through her school without collapsing. She was not able to get a proper education very well before the start of the series.  She had less opportunities than most to get normal experiences. She also had little capacity to be physically active, which gives more reason for her being pathetically weak than because the jokes of her being incapable demand it. This strength of writing just gets better as the series goes on because we see her develop into a character that is less incompetent and less physically weak. Rather than riding on these same failure jokes, we actually see Shamiko develop into a character who is capable. She manages to defeat a magical creature on her own, Sakura (the character who set up this whole town and is the most important non main character in the overall story) basically passes the torch of being the town’s caretaker on to her, she is the leader of the operation and successfully uses her abilities to remove Mikan’s curse and save Ugallu. She starts out the series as incompetent and capable of very little, being liked but looked down on by most of the cast. But she grows to be respected by everyone, to the point where Momo and Mikan eventually do consider themselves her “minions”. She truly grows from a dumb and unconfident little girl into a leader that very capable people like Momo and Mikan see as an equal. She grows mentally as well as physically. She gets access to more magical abilities, she gets less physically unwell, she gets more confident in herself. 

Ryo is shown to be very smart, which makes sense in comparison to Shamiko because she was healthy enough to be in school. And she is not just naturally smart, she actually has the drive to be smarter as she wants to support her sister. Which you can say is her wanting to support Shamiko in return for how Shamiko took on her portion of the curse. Ryo stands out more than just the “smart child” archetype she fits into. DGND is filled with details that elevate even the minor characters into more than just archetypes. 

Shamiko still has the motivation to win and get stronger, but she realizes intentionally hurting Momo or another magical girl isn’t the way she wants to go about it. And she doesn’t want Momo to hurt herself to get her the blood either. Especially when we learn from the accidental blood offering that the result of using blood to lift the curse permanently weakened Momo slightly. Which by reading into the subtext you realize means she lost mana, which according to the way they describe magical girls in this universe, is her entire existence. This is one specific example of how dark subject matter is present in the generally goofy and bubbly story.  

I love Shamiko and Momo’s dynamic, it's the crux of this series and the appeal. Their “rivalry” quickly develops into basically being just a roleplay bit between the two. It changes from Shamiko wanting to physically beat Momo to effectively emotionally overtaking her. She wants to be respected by Momo and make Momo into her vassal. It still has the original intention of making Momo submit to her, but in a more intimate and consensual way. It doesn’t feel like the idea of defeating Momo in battle was forgotten, it feels like Shamiko’s goals and motivations naturally change. 

You really buy into Shamiko and Momo’s friendship because we get so much time with them together. There are other characters who are important and get screen time, but Shaminomo is the focal point. 

DGND is legitimately the only ship I care about in all of anime. Their personalities mesh so perfectly. Simplest way to describe them is tsundere x kuudere. I really want to put emphasis on me, someone who has never cared for shipping, am very into this ship. I live for cute fanart of them together. They have so many cute and funny interactions. The way their personalities flip on the stereotypes of a demon and magical girl are very good. Shamiko is incredibly pure, always wanting to help people and find a peaceful solution. On the other hand Momo is fairly dark in the way she thinks, being more conniving and directly confrontational when a situation comes up. 

There’s so many situations where the series has very obvious romantic subtext. And I fully buy into it, it works so well. Its romantic af. I also think their dynamic is written very great because you don’t HAVE TO interpret their relationship as romantic. You can see it as just very close friends. Or you can see them as having a sisterly bond, having the report of both argumentative and caring similar to how I’ve heard people describe sisters. The idea of Momo’s (not blood relative) sister’s core literally being in Shamiko also lends some credence to this interpretation. 

Do I think they’re gonna be in a romantic relationship by the end of this? Probably not. But that doesn’t necessarily mean this is trashy gay baiting. I think it being up to interpretation is fine when it’s backed up by good writing. And here it absolutely is. And even though I made the point that you could see it as unromantic, I just can’t lol. Just to give one example- Shamiko learns about the vassal contract (aka demon marriage) that her Mom and Dad went through and then immediately goes to Momo and says she should be her vassal. That scene has very obvious romantic intention and you cannot deny it. And this moment is not just some one-off thing to get the yuri fans going again, the idea of Momo becoming Shamiko's vassal is very important going forward from there.

I love these two so much as a couple. They have hilarious back and forths, their personalities mesh very well, we see their growing understanding of each other, they can be adorably possessive at times, there's is just so much endearing and charming about their dynamic. I finally understood how people who are super into a ship feel. 

All of the characters are at least enjoyable in some way, but the heart of the show is the main duo. And the show never really tries to go against that. If you don’t ship Shamiko and Momo that's fine, but to me it never really presents anyone else as super shippable other than Mikan, and It's very clear that isn't something the show itself is pushing. 

To quickly go on about other core characters- Lilith is really great, she is really cute and has a lot of funny jokes. And later on she ends up spending less time being the butt of jokes and is genuinely very helpful. Ryo is cute and her relationship with her sister is super wholesome, Mikan is really great and gets a lot of personality and more to do S2 onwards, Shamiko’s mom has some funny moments and has an interesting role, Anri is funny and a good goofball friend, Lico is a funny addition who grew on me a lot, Shirosawa has some funny moments and works as a straight man to Lico’s shenanigans (as well as being the only male character in the show), Sion was my least favorite at first but she also gets a lot to do later and gets more characterization than just “occult + science girl”. 

DGND has a much larger and overarching story than most cute wholesome shows do. And it’s written very well. It seems like this would be a mostly episodic cute event of the week kind of story, but its got a heavy story and complete continuity. Story details are spread out well, dripped in between various normal moments in the show. There are constantly little hints being thrown around about the history and background elements. A lot of things that initially seem like just gags actually end up being relevant to a later scene or the overall story. There are a lot of visual details that end up being used later. The story resonates very strongly because the characters are deeply involved in it. A simple story for this simply could’ve been “an evil threat enters the peaceful town and Shamiko and crew need to stop it” with some random villain. Instead, everyone is relevant. Shamiko’s father is involved, Momo’s sister is involved, Shamiko being in the hospital is involved. The town and the characters in it really feel like they have history, and that history is very important to them and the story. And the story does have a lot of dark elements to it. I really like how this very positive and upbeat series has these serious and dark accents that help to balance it out. It makes it more engrossing. It's a very good mix of goofy with enough dark and dramatic elements to make you pause and think seriously about what is going on. The show manages to have plenty of simple episodic bits where it's just the characters being cute and having fun, but not too often or lacking little bits that remind you that there's a serious story and deeper issues. The story generally just continues being interesting and engaging, it never really dips. There are lots of mysteries that you really want to know the answers to. 

One moment I like from episode 12 is when Shamiko, Momo and Lilith are talking about Shamiko becoming her vassal.

This just seems like a joke in the moment since they are calling out how Momo is much more like a Demon and should fall to darkness by becoming Shamiko's vassal. Later on this is exactly what happens, despite Momo declining becoming her vassal. But even if you did immediately think this is foreshadowing, when it does come back up it's not exactly how or when you would expect it. So, it's interesting and surprising whether you assumed its foreshadowing or not. This is just one of many moments and a more direct one where something you expect to just be a joke ends up being an important detail later that gets revisited.

A truly unique aspect of the town is how demons and magical girls are set up to not interact with each other. That is in order to apparently keep the peace. Shamiko is able to transcend this because she has Sakura’s core. So she is the only one who can unite all the magical people in the town in order to figure things out and protect the town. I really like this detail. 

To compare DGND to another one of my favorite series, the town of DGND feels similar to Morioh of Jojo part 4. Over time we spend so much time getting to know different places and people in it that it grows into a place that you can believe exists. You see all the moving parts and areas that make it function. You can imagine where people go and what they do outside of what's directly on screen. This is what is required to make a fully realized setting, and as a result makes the story very engrossing. Reaching this should be the main goal of a series that has a static setting, and I feel both these shows excel at this.

There is so much well written slow growth in the series. Shamiko and Momo opening up to each other, Shamiko growing more capable, Lilith being able to interact more, the characters learning about the history of the town. It's very satisfying and feels natural. Its distributed very well. 

Where many stories rely on big lore dumps, DGND never has this problem because of how well details are parceled throughout the series. Momo starts out as a very taciturn character you don’t know much about. Momo never goes on some long rant about her entire sad backstory in one moment. That isn’t necessary because if you pay attention during the dialogue, you can get all of it in a more natural way. As it comes out organically through her conversations with Shamiko and other characters and when the story actually demands that information. She doesn’t need to directly say that she is depressed because you can figure that out from how she talks and acts in little moments. She doesn’t need to directly say why she is not an active magical girl anymore because you can figure out that bad things went down from little moments in her conversations. The writing is not lazy and does not treat the viewer like they are dumb. It gives you the opportunity to speculate and figure things out yourself, then later when it makes sense for the characters to be direct, they clarify things. 

Putting great writing aside for just a moment, DGND is SO CUTE AND WHOLESOME. So many moments of the characters just getting along and having fun together that are super endearing. This show is just so charming and makes you smile. 

DGND is also very funny. Shamiko and Momo’s report is hilarious, especially at the beginning when they’re more at odds. There’s lots of silly weird gags, like puns and random goofy things. All over you can see little visual gags, like text on an object or a goofy item. DGND has a openly goofy tone that it presents confidently. One recurring joke that's really funny is how all the normal people react tamely to all the magical stuff that goes on. There’s a good mix of different kinds of jokes. There are also lots of gags parodying magical girls. I mentioned how I like how it has the negative perspective of magical girls to balance the positive aspects. The show continues to be very balanced by having magical girl parody as well as unironically cool magical girl things (mainly the transformations). It does its silly moments in good ways. Its goofy but doesn’t do it too much and make it feel like its random just for the sake of it. The anime mixes goofiness and story perfectly. I love the tone of this series so much. 

There isn’t exactly a ton of serious life messages, but there’s nice stuff about societal expectations and getting along with people. When it comes to the magical society, it's very clearly anti segregation and anti-stereotyping based on race. 

This show has the philosophy of “finding joy in the little things” that you see a lot in Japanese media. Such as the very poor Shamiko family still remaining happy. I’ve always vibed with this perspective and like how it's portrayed here. 

DGND is not the best-looking show visually in the animation department, but it is great where it matters, and the weaker parts are often played as a strength. The art is generally very good but the animation is very limited. But especially in season 1 the limited visuals are played very well. Whether it's the magical transformations still looking very good or using limited animation to do funny gags (like the EEEHHH gif you probably saw even if you did not watch the show when it first came out where they just wiggle around the static image). Imo the limited animation really doesn’t hurt the viewing experience. And it gets better in S2. All the magical transformations are really good. I think the coloring in particular for the anime are very nice. 

And there’s one visual aspect of DGND that takes a lot of extra effort, which is the character designs. One visually distinct thing that elevates DGND above a lot of anime is the number of outfits the main characters have. It adds so much more personality. They feel so much more alive because it feels like they actually have a closet full of clothes. There is so much more effort put into the character design. So many series just have the characters in a singular outfit 99% of the time. Which is understandable because that's easier to draw and replicate. But it can make them feel more like a character that only exists for that singular thing. Characters only shown in combat outfits are hard to imagine in another scenario when they aren't on the battlefield. With school uniforms it's hard to imagine then without them. But with DGND the number of outfits we get for the characters make it easier to imagine them in a variety of situations. They feel like they have lives because they have all the outfits they would for people who have normal lives. Sometimes shows feel like time stops in between what we as the audience see, like the characters don’t have lives outside of what we see. But DGND in multiple ways avoids this issue due to its character designs and other details. This is an incredibly important point to me. I absolutely love this aspect of the show and wish more shows did this. I have a lot more respect for the art of the show because of this point. 

Another character design aspect that is done very well is Shamiko’s tail. Her tail is incredibly expressive and constantly moving and changing. It portrays a lot of her emotions and is a thing for us and also the characters in the show to react to. I love the characters, primarily Momo, reacting to Shamiko’s tail expressions. It really shows how Momo pays attention to Shamiko and makes the characters feel like they have more spacial awareness. Bring that up because I feel sometimes shows can make characters appear to only see or hear what the writing allows them to in a questionable way. Verbal example of this is when a character says half a sentence before getting cut off, and everyone acts like they heard nothing at all. The anime portrays the tail well, and further makes Shamiko a very expressive and an interesting character to watch. Which is very important for a main character. 

While there can be limited animation it still succeeds at making the characters be very expressive. There are lots of great faces.

I also like all of the openings and endings. One thing nice about them is that they don’t directly spoil anything like many openings tend to but do have little things that can make you go “oh i know what that creature is” or “I get that now!”. 

Now to the sound design, which is immaculate. The anime has the best sound effects of anything I’ve watched. There are so many great goofy sound effects that add to the character's reactions. My favorite has to be the train whistle toy used when Shamiko or Lilith is angry. The sound effects further add to how expressive the characters feel. The creators clearly had a ton of fun doing the sound design and it comes through. A fun goofy soundtrack for a fun and goofy show. 

The music is also very good as a whole. I usually don’t pay a ton of attention to background music but I’m obsessed with DGND so I do here. I think the BGM fits well with the setting. They sound very magical and fantastical while also sounding modern. It's very peppy and can get high energy with Shamiko’s strong reactions, while also being very low during the slower moments. And sad when it needs to. I’m not great at describing good music since I’m not a huge fan of music, so I’ll just say it's far above average in my opinion. My favorite track is probably Shamiko’s transformation theme. 

The voice acting (just talking about the Japanese voice actors, i haven’t seen a lot of the eng dub) is super good. Of course, Konomi Kohara is absolutely amazing as Shamiko. She is the master of cute anime girl noises and gives so much energy in her performance. She brings out Shamiko’s wide range of emotions and mannerisms extremely well. Momo’s voice acting is also extremely good, the soft but dull voice perfectly fits Momo’s character. All around the voice acting is excellent but the main two really have their personalities on full display from the voice acting. 

When it comes to anime vs manga, I do like the manga. But the voice acting, soundtrack and anime additions add so much for me. I have to recommend the anime over the manga. But if you are more sensitive to the anime girl noises type of thing and find it annoying, you will likely enjoy the manga more. 

—---Here’s a good spot if you are skipping to the end—----

Each individual aspect of the show is strong. The characters and the world are very dense and endearing with great drama and emotion behind them. If you are into light romances, you will very much adore the sweet relationship between Shamiko and Momo. If you enjoy light fantasy then I feel DGND provides a unique world with interesting interpretation of magical girls and demons. If you just like comedies, DGND will keep you laughing constantly with its silly gags. If you enjoy a detailed story that builds over time, you should greatly enjoy the story here. If you just want girls doing cute and wholesome things there’s plenty of it. I really do recommend this series to anyone. 

I absolutely adore this series, it's very close to my heart. It’s in my top favorites and I consider it my comfort show. Fanart of DGND never fails to make me feel a little happier. I love this goofy world and its endearing characters. I love the complex and constantly developing story. I love the wholesomeness with dark flavors behind it. 

I had a ton of fun writing this one! It brought me a lot of joy getting back into the nitty gritty of this series. I wrote a ton for this and spent way more time on it than my other posts so far. Hopefully it wasn’t too much messier than the others in terms of formatting, separation etc. It’s so long and I didn’t want to spend a ton more time just doing minor edits lol. But I truly did put a lot into this one, it deserves it! I really tried to put down anything I thought of well and remove very little. I could go on even more if I let myself, but I do not want to force it and have this take a long time. I've written enough, I'm satisfied.

Also if you want to hear more gushing about this show and get that episode by episode, I highly recommend Anime Slushie’s YouTube videos on DGND. I like their discussions on the show. And re-listening to them helped me to get the writing juices flowing. If we get a season 3 you better believe I’ll be doing episode by episode posts where I go into detail on everything. 

I want to end this by wishing the absolute best to Izumo Ito, the author of DGND who has been combating health issues. Thank you for all your hard work on this amazing series! Thanks for reading! Please check out Demon Girl Next Door / Machikado Mazoku! And please give us season 3.

[a-tale-of-legends]

Would you consider Carmine to be emotionally and psychologically abusive to Kieran? Just finished the Teal Mask and ngl, I ended up greatly disliking her because she just feels too unnecessarily cruel.

No???? Not at all???? Carmine isn't a saint. She needs to understand that some things aren't about her. She also needs to be a better older sister to Kieran. But I don't think she's emotionally and psychologically abusive.

From my own playthrough of the teal mask, I immediately picked up on how intense Carmine is, but my thoughts were " ah yes, an older sister" cause, hello, I'm an older sister, I get it, I get how some dynamics between older and younger siblings work. That being said, Carmine does take it too far- again, she seems like she just doesn't know how to handle her own emotions ( anger seems to be an easier emotion for her to handle), which definitely doesn't justify how she treats Kieran, but it does give perspective imo.

Aaaah, I don't know. Carmine reminds me a lot of my younger self, though much much less intense and brash( and I've long since grew out of that part of my life anyhow). I think Carmine has a lot of growing to do, 100%, but the way she is now....I dunno, I don't think I would classify it as abuse. It's clear that Carmine and Kieran are in a cruel cycle: Kieran is too shy and has horrendously low self esteem that he ends up relying on Carmine for a lot of things, even when he himself wants to do things on his own. In turn, Carmine has been put into this position of Caretaker. The one that handles everything and the one that knows best, and isn't questioned on it. This cycle continues for who knows how until the player comes along and breaks it.....in the worst way possible, but they still break it. It's why Kieran and Carmine pretty much act the way they do, now that they're no longer confined into a role that they've been stuck in for a long time.

I still want to make it clear that Carmine still hurts Kieran,and while I don't think that was her intention ( in fact, I think in her own head she thought she was helping Kieran in some way), it's clear that her actions and behavior has hurt Kieran and it's something she should apologize for.

[bloomingapricots]

Dreams of Divergent

AKA Give Zhuzhi-lang a cultivator too

Updated here first at AO3

The reader is called Dúzhě (读者) which means “reader”

Make it more dramatic by making this Duzhe related to Su Xiyan

Reader is called Su Duzhe

To be clear, this Duzhe is blood related to Su Xiyan and even though Duzhe calls her Jiejie, Duzhe is not Su Xiyan’s blood sister. It would be weird, to me, that an uncle and nephew pair after marrying a pair of sisters then become brother-in-laws.

This Duzhe will be female as this work is even more self-indulgent

You do not remember much of your previous life in the modern world because you are a bit of a daydreamer. Even now, you hazily went through life in a daze, lost in your imagination reading and writing. Making your only blood relative, Su Xiyan, who is also your caretaker, worried.

You slightly recognized her name from a Danmei you read, even more when you learned the name of her Scet, Huan Hua Palace. You reincarnated into Scum Villain Self-Saving System, probably, as Luo Binghe’s only other maternal blood relative that you are pretty sure did not exist in the lore. But it does not matter to you currently as you are living in pre-canon time. Specifically, right before your sister's assignment of getting close to Luo Binghe’s father.

“Duzhe-meimei!” Your sister called. You looked up from your writing as you make a living as a writer, unlike your sister. Though she did buy this house for you to live in as she did not feel comfortable with you living with her in the Huan Hua Palace, not that she sleeps there, because even she knows that the Old Palace Master is not looking at her like a master should. She worried that when she goes on night-hunts or business trips that the Old Palace Master would do something to you even though she was the one who taught you cultivation.

“Jiejie, you're here,” you greeted as she sat across from you.

“How is my Meimei?” She asked.

“Fine, I recently published Heats of One and Heats of Many,” You mentioned, your sister couldn't help but snort as she remembers the draft of that story. It shamelessly was an omegaverse story. “It became quite popular.” It indeed did. After all, this world after all was originally a smut novel.

“How shameless,” she teased.

“Money is money,” you retorted.

“Anyway, I have to go seduce a heavenly demon,” she mentioned. “Don’t get kidnapped… again,”

“Please, I got returned immediately,” you jokingly huffed, which caused your sister to laugh.

“Still, you wander too far in your head, which means your feet will also wander too far,” she said.

“I… cannot refute that” You do indeed walk too far when you daydream, you once wandered all the way to another village. But in the end, you reassure your sister that you will be fine. You may not go on night-hunts often, but you are a cultivator in your own right. She left after a week, double checking that the Old Palace Master does not know where you live, to go find Tianlang-jun.

[Host, what will you do? Allow destiny’s design or will you thread their fate yourself?] Your system asked. A cute red panda floating in slow circles around your head after you waved your sister as she rode off. Your system, unlike Shen Yuan’s and Shang Qinghua’s, is not restrictive, allowing you freedom to fuck things up. Your system acts more like a familiar than a system, it is because your system is on the younger side and grows as you grow.

“Well, since we are in SVSSS and not PIDW, I like that Yuan made the harem protagonist gay for him,” you giggled. “But I don’t know how it will develop, as there are many scenarios to consider.” You slowly walked back to your home. Luckily, people cannot see you talking to your system. “I do know my sister will not stand Shen Jiu mistreating her son, much less Tianlang-jun, I think, in the case that I made sure Binghe has them in his life. Actually, will Binghe even be called Luo Binghe?” You asked mostly to yourself. “I could influence my sister to call him Binghe but he will definitely be called Su Binghe,“ You shrugged, “That’s not too bad, oh but his demon heritage, how will Tianlang-jun feel about sealing his heritage,” You continue to mumble your thoughts and worries to your system who patiently listens.

[izvmimi]

Your house is silent. Suspiciously silent for midday.

It’s even more suspicious when you consider that Asta is home. His louder than others volume may never be an intentional choice, he’s simply so full of life and joy it leaves him quicker than he can pare it down for everyone else’s sake most of the time. It still renders you a little bit curious as to what you missed out on while you were sleeping.

Perhaps he has stepped out of the house. But then he would have had to bundle up the reason you were asleep midday to take with him anyway.

Birds chirp idly outside of your window, the sun sits high in the sky. Even the world is telling you to rise and shine despite the sleep deprivation that claws at your brain. It may be for a good reason, the recent addition of your son making you a family of four, but you have to admit you forgot how rough the newborn days are. Or maybe you didn’t have them at all, recalling how easy of a baby Archer’s older sister Luna was without much effort.

The little guy simply takes after his dad and loves to use his voice. It’s hard to hold it against him, being new to the world and all.

With a sigh you step one foot and then the other out of bed, slowly and quietly walking toward your bedroom door. The silence you were so suspicious of ends as soon as you approach the doorframe, your husband’s attempted hushed whisper sneaking in through the crack at the bottom of the door.

“The two of you look so much alike.”

He’s talking to Luna, you surmise. She’s curious about everything in her little world, her brother most of all. Since the moment she laid eyes on him she has poked his cheeks gently, held his hands, and begged each of you to let her hold him constantly despite your gentle yet firm reminders that she isn’t quite big enough for that yet.

You don’t wanna saddle the oldest with the expectations of caretaking for the younger children, something you and Asta both agree about. She should simply get to be his big sister, a role she takes seriously.

“He’s too squishy to look like me,” Luna responds, making you chuckle through the closed door.

Asta softly shushes her. You open the door a crack to see a finger pressed against his lips, Archer balanced on his opposite arm, and Luna in his lap looking between her father and brother curiously.

“You were squishy like that too, you know.”

Your daughter sighs and slumps forward with a pout. You wonder which of her bratty pseudo-aunts or extended family she learned this habit from and shake your head.

“You’re wrong daddy. I’ve always been pretty, Birdie told me so.”

And there’s your answer. Of course it was the Blackbird who is working on giving your daughter an ego the size of her own. You stifle another giggle hearing Asta sigh, nodding while gently rocking his son.

“Of course, and you always will be.” A smart man chooses his battles.

Luna looks around the living room but her attention is quickly grabbed by the crack in the door and the tiniest sliver of your face that’s visible to her.

“Mama!” She shouts, waking her brother into a mewling fit that your husband quickly attempts to quiet by bending to kiss the top of his head.

Scrambling off of the couch, little feet stomping as quickly as they can across the wooden floors, Luna rushes to fling the door open and wrap her arms around your thighs with a grin. That devilish little look is all Asta, even that he can’t deny.

“Good morning! I missed you.”

Reaching down to smooth your hand over her forehead as she speaks, you smile. Asta turns his head to smile at you, warmth from his lips to his eyes and beaming straight into your heart enough that you feel instantly rejuvenated even if your day’s sleep wasn’t all that great.

The exhaustion is difficult right now but looking into her little face and then across the room at her now sated and drooling brother, you know it’s completely worth it.

what if i throttle you OH MY BABIES OH THE LOVES OF MY LIFE OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

this is how i'm looking at this beautiful piece

thank you for thinking so positively of my widdle family the loveeee and yes luna loves you birdieeeeee

i love you so much stop being nice to me