#i connect a lot to femininity in my own way

[snakesartblog]

I spent a day or two digging through BKMN for analysis, and I’ve got some interesting stuff to share! 

CWs: referenced sexual assault, murder, pregnancy

I'm writing this so that anyone could read it and have some understanding of it, even if they haven't read BKMN. This isn’t a formal essay and there isn’t one specific point that I’m getting at, but I’d argue that the central theme of the story is desire vs coercion.

WEGG

Wegg is the protagonist of BKMN and the symbolism around his storyline isn’t particularly subtle. It’s about finding acceptance as a man, especially following loss of bodily autonomy in sexual assault (unfortunately tends to be viewed as feminine). Following debatably consensual sex with the Swans, Wegg is cursed to die every month, a pretty clear parallel to menstruation, and then he “gives birth” to Calum. The connections from the assault to these things, very dysphoria-inducing for many transmascs, and his need to find meaning and masculinity of his own, I think exemplify the central theme of the book.

His desire for  masculinity and acceptance are very present through the entire book. Even his mannerisms and speech seem very intentionally masculinized, especially in contrast with mild-mannered Neighbor. I’d be surprised if this wasn’t purposeful on his part! In a symbolic sense, he finds acceptance and recognition with Neighbor, another trans person, when he explains his need to die each month and Neighbor takes it in stride. Despite the loss of autonomy he experienced and how it continues to affect him, he finds a place for himself among other trans people. Moreover, he’s homeless - lacking acceptance and community - until he moves in with Neighbor, and when he says that he doesn’t typically eat enough, from then on we see Neighbor cook or buy him food constantly. The symbolism here is pretty strong I think! Wegg feels that he is only accepted or loved when performing a femininity that he hates (as victim/messiah for the Swans and also demonstrated in the flashbacks to his past) until he finds others like him. 

NEIGHBOR

Neighbor is a super interesting way to write a trans character and weave transness into their storyline, in my opinion. It’s established from the first few pages of the book that he kills people, but specifically people who he perceives as harmful to others. Despite filling a classic “violent cis man” niche, a serial killer, he’s aware of his situation and power differentials around him and directs his necessary killing towards at least a less harmful route. Even the very first person we see Neighbor kill, in the opening of the book, is heavily implied to be the target because he committed sexual assault against his partner. He also doesn’t kill out of a desire to do so, and the moment Wegg offers his own blood, giving Neighbor a way out from the murders, Neighbor jumps at the opportunity. Compare this with Rarold, who I’d argue is a foil to Neighbor. They’re both relative outsiders in the community, they both butt heads with Tillman in one way or another, and they both kill people - but Rarold kills only because he wants to, he has no need to do so like Neighbor, and he is exclusively seen targeting young women. Rarold represents the sexist violence typically found in the stories of real-life serial killers, and in doing so makes it clear that Neighbor is not that kind of person.

Neighbor’s position in the town is also interesting, especially in comparison to Wegg’s. Neighbor is a member of the Baths community, arguably due to the services he provides for its members, but he’s still an outsider; no one knows him that well, he has no friends until he meets Wegg, and Tillman gets a bad vibe from him. In the context of this narrative about transmasculinity, there’s a lot there - Neighbor passes as a man thanks to his deal with Trudy, and he pays dearly for it with the murders he enacts. He asks Tillman not to disclose his first name, a name he never uses, to anyone following their trip to the Trudy temple “for safety purposes,” a mirror to the way any stealth trans person might talk about a legal name they never changed. Neighbor is accepted as a man in this pillar of the community, traditionally masculine provider role that he’s built for himself, but he’s still an outsider, and knows that he would risk losing the support of those around him were he open about his transness. To maintain his personal safety he trades openness regarding his identity, close relationships with those around him, and his conception of his own morality (he says multiple times that he doesn’t consider himself a good person due to the murders he has to commit). Even so, despite his lack of close ties to the cisgender people in the community and his idea of himself as a bad person, he tries to direct his killing to reduce the harm he’s doing, he helps Tillman find Trudy, houses Wegg, and does chores for, like, half the town of Baths. Despite his position, he clearly cares about the people around him and wants to be a positive influence.

As a note, there’s a bit of Biblical symbolism connected to Neighbor, but it’s not consistent. I couldn’t find a properly reliable source for it, but the internet says that the name Adie was originally a diminutive of Adam. He built his own body, making him his own God, and was cast out from Eden (became an outsider in the community) in the process. His original body was also burned on a cross following his deal with Trudy!

THE GODS

I think the conflict of the story is most concisely exemplified in the conflict between Trudy and Calum. Trudy represents desire itself, as the book very explicitly tells us. She’s the snake in Eden of Neighbor’s symbolism, and her devotees follow her very willingly. Trudy’s religion is decidedly voluntary, she grants her followers’ desires and only takes what they’re willing to give. She requires Neighbor kill people because it’s within his capacity, but Tillman isn’t required to harm others at all - dealing with Trudy is morally neutral and never seems to be forced. Calum, on the other hand, was forced onto Wegg, and represents a loss of autonomy for the power of others. The followers of the two gods are juxtaposed, especially in the ways Wegg and Tillman are treated as new followers of Calum and Trudy respectively. The fight scene between the two gods in the climax of the book is symbolic of the central themes of desire and consent.

[juvederm]

raving about trans josh . suck my nuts

i honestly don't see a lot for trans josh in art or writing. and i kinda feel like nobody sees a more feminine look or energy for him which is kind of lame. there's nothing that suggests he wouldn't like feminine things, and maybe it's his brazen dialogue that leads people to believe he's like any other dude who strictly presents masculine. which i mean, yes in the game he's never wearing anything that isn't, much like the rest of the guys.

i bring up femininity and masculinity because of how they are depicted in his concept masks. i have a feeling that people might think i "feminize" josh for no reason but the truth is that i got this idea from his concept mask artwork.

sad girl, sheila. sad girl especially is my favorite. and whatever this could just be me running on high levels of copium, but after already headcanoning josh as trans and then seeing these, i cherished this headcanon even more.

i can honestly see josh as transfem or transmasc, he's trans either way to me. i often think about him hiding his true forms of expression in favor of appealing to others, doing it for your own safety, etc, something i think trans people like myself can relate to.

some masks have themes related to motherhood as well.

and listen. i know sometimes horror plays into the themes of femininity within serial killers in horror media (like some being into crossdressing for example), but like i said. when thinking about josh being TRANS and seeing this, it fuels my belief for it more than ever. especially since it's in a Horror game as well.

like obviously this wasn't intended to be in the game as trans coding, it was inevitable for me personally to not let my favorite character get away with being cisgender LMFAO i had to stomp that out, it's just something i do, i think other trans people in fandom can relate to projecting that onto their faves.

and i know the until dawn fandom is fond of trans chris as it's literally the only trans headcanon i ever see no shade. and i like that one! truthfully, i do. sometimes i'm at odds with the way it's characterized in fics and whatnot, but it's a wholesome and harmless headcanon. i just wish i saw more for trans josh :-(

a lot of this headcanon requires brainstorming i think, you're not gonna use a lot of like. in game proof (besides the concept art) to try and justify it bc you literally don't need to for any lgbt headcanon honestly. esp in a heteronormative game like until dawn. like i know there's no way in Hell that SMG intended for josh to be trans, but it's my favorite headcanon ever and the only headcanon i've ever made a whole TIMELINE for because it speaks to me so much.

i also wanna bring up body horror and transformation. this also has to do with trans hannah. this, iirc, was kind of around back in the days of the fandom, but it's truly one of the best. i don't know if anyone at the time considered it. but i took hannah's transformation (and by proxy, josh's too) as trans coding as well, ofc it wasn't intended that way, i just think it makes things more interesting.

the idea of your body changing and you can't stop it sounds a lot like puberty to me and how it felt when i was going through it. sometimes horror movies even indulge in this idea, leading a lot of people to believe it as a metaphor for growing up trans (i've watched a lot of video essays mentioning this concept) and i wasn't gonna let josh or hannah off that easy. you are both TRANSGENDER.

of course this is all just projecting, but i just want these hcs to get some more love. also feminine josh, come on guys, can you really not see it for him? bc i can. maybe not as something he does Outwardly with confidence, but still, i don't see josh as him being strictly masculine, although i still love that look for him. not saying i don't.

thanks for coming to my ted talk.

+ some more masks. i love the doll related ones because i associate josh and hannah with dolls. like a lot.

[bookdragonideas]

Here's the thing. I'm a girl, and as a girl, I really like it when girls are portrayed in fiction. Especially fantasy.

But so much fiction/fantasy mixes up 'girls' with 'unstoppable forces of female badass' and there's not necessarily anything wrong with having a character who is an 'unstoppable forces of female badass'. But it gets old real quick. And it is not the same as portraying normal girls, or having good female characters.

And that's one of the many reasons I love Avatar the Last Airbender.

Because all the girl characters have flaws and weaknesses and sometimes act like idiots or jerks. They get emotional and make mistakes. They lose fights or arguments or are just wrong sometimes. Some of them are amazing warriors, and some aren't. Some are powerful or special and some are normal, with nothing special about them.

And I Love that.

I was around the same age as Katara when I first watched Atla. And I instantly connected with her as a character. I loved her optimistic attitude and her fighting spirit. And I could relate with her anger, and with her maternal instinct. I admired her fighting skills of course, but I loved how the show portrayed her compassion and kindness, the way she could both beat up a bunch of bullies AND enjoy a relaxing day at the spa. She was a baddass warrior that should never be crossed. But she was also a normal teenage girl who had a lot of the same internal struggles and problems that I did.

(I never connected to Toph on the same level, but I did relate to her on a few things. She's an adorable trash gremlin who would commit any crime for fun and I love that. But she struggles with being both independent and letting people help her, and I still struggle with that sometimes. I've learned that sometimes, you can help others by letting them help you.)

Yue is, in my opinion, a perfect example of a type of hero that seems to be disappearing. She is not a warrior. She is not a fighter. She's not even a bender.

Yue is a perfect princess, a perfect daughter. She is extremely feminine in a rather older sense.

And she was the only one who could save the world. She gave up everything for her people. She saved everything, everyone, the entire world. Without ever becoming a fighter.

Yue is a perfect example of a girl who was never more than a girl, and how that's okay. Not every girl has to be rough and tumble and fight for her rights in order to change everything. Sometimes it's okay to just be a quiet obedient girly girl. Sometimes that's all it takes to be a hero.

And I love that. Yue is strong in her own way. She is unique and interesting. She appears in only a few episodes and yet manages to be one of my favorite characters.

Song is another great example of this. Song is a healer in a small town. We don't see much of her but we see her compassion and empathy. She is gentle and generous. A healer not a fighter.

She watches Zuko steal her ostrich horse and does nothing.

Is that because she's kind and generous and knows he needs it more? Or is it because she's a healer girl who knows she can't actually stop those two from taking the horse? Maybe neither, maybe both. I have always thought that the scene where Zuko steals the horse and only the audience knows she saw it is one of the most thought-provoking in the series.

Suki is a badass warrior woman who is an awesome fighter and good leader. She is one of the best non bender fighter we see in the entire show. She was one of the smartest, most efficient, and powerful characters we ever saw.

She kissed a boy she had just met because she thought he was cute.

Now don't get me wrong I love SokkaxSuki. Its one of the best couples in the show.

But Suki totally did the old 'love at first sight' thing. And that is awesome. Because when she kisses him she delivers one of the best lines, not only from her, but, I think, in the entire show.

"I AM a warrior, but I'm a girl too."

Being a warrior doesn't mean that she isn't also a teenage girl. She might be a fighter, but she still gets crushes and likes to flirt with cute boys. And hey, she picked a good one. Not every boy is going to come break you out of prison.

Anyways, let's have more realistic girls in fiction. And please enjoy the next 24 hours.

[transmisogyny-explained]

I want to submit a perspective on "afab transfemininity" from. an afab multi gender person. I know my experience isn't representative of everyone who calls themselves this, but I wanted to at least share

I don't call myself a trans woman, I hesitate to call myself transfem. nonetheless, I feel connected to femininity in a distinctly transgender way. when I first came out, I hated being a girl. I was a transmedicalist and validated myself by invalidating others. I had to face a lot of internalized misogyny and transphobia in order to really learn what it meant to be a man. after I started testosterone about 3 yrs ago, I realized I was a lesbian, and started feeling more comfortable being, at least in part, a woman. it was different this time because it was something I liked, something new and my own, not something ascribed to me. it's not cisgender in any way, it is transfemininity

this being said, I know my experience toward transfemininity is extremely different from the norm. I am not what most people are referring to when they refer to transfems, and there are many definitions of transfem that do not include me. despite that, I do have some experiences that overlap, things I can relate to. my femininity is at its core transgender in nature. my gender now is more complex... I feel like both a man and a woman, neither and both. but that doesn't mean my feelings about my gender are predatory or invalid. I don't want to talk over transfems, I am very aware of my place in these conversations. but I still have a place, and it frustrates me to see you share posts that minimize my experience into a stereotype

Why do you view transfemininity as being, at its core, the experience of being “both a man and a woman” lmao

Get back to me when you start viewing trans women as actual women and transfemininity as actual femininity, and not an aesthetic or a vibe or “some other third thing” apart from femininity.

You “feel femininity in a distinctly transgender way?” Congrats! You’re nonbinary! But that is NOT what being a trans woman is — Their womanhood and femininity is not essentially different from cis women’s.

What you are describing is a very generic experience of being a feminine nonbinary person, and I don't say that to insult you; but to compare that experience to those of trans women’s betrays the fact that you don't view them as the same gender as cis women. Which is transmisogyny. It’s textbook third-gendering.

Call yourself a nonbinary woman- Call yourself whatever you want, in fact. But trans women and TMA people are never going to feel safe around you so long as you continue insisting that transfemininity is essentially the same as the nonbinary femininity you experience, and essentially different from “real” cis women’s femininity.

Also, can I just say that it’s a little condescending that you would end your ask by saying “I’m aware of my place in these conversations, but…”

Like, if you were really “aware of your place” and were actually listening to transfems when we talk about transfeminism, you would be able to recognize the enormous amount of transmisogyny baked into your message. On top of the third-gendering, you also managed to:

Imply that TMA people don’t understand the complexities of gender and nonbinarity like you, a TME person, do

Imply that TMA people creating the language and spaces to discuss our experiences in a way that excludes you, a TME person, is invalidating and somehow tantamount to labeling you as “predatory” (what does that even mean?)

Sent an unprompted ask to a transfem’s blog venting your frustrations with the language of transfeminism, despite the fact that I’m not even the one who made those posts?

Showed a pretty absurd amount of entitlement by insinuating that it’s somehow my problem that you feel frustration over misunderstanding the basics of transfeminist theory

Subtly demanded that I do the emotional labor of managing your frustration, which, frankly, is just classic misogyny

Displayed a complete lack of understanding towards what transmisogyny even is, nor why we, as the direct targets of transmisogyny, need the the language and spaces to discuss it

I really don’t care what transfem “experiences” you think you relate to, the fact that you perpetuate and can benefit from transmisogyny will always separate you from us, and if you actually gave a shit about us and our struggles, you would recognize that and try to be a better ally to us rather than co-opting and redefining our language in a shallow attempt to define us out of existence.

As has been said countless times now:

“Transfeminine” does not mean “trans + feminine,” it is a term coined by TMA people to describe our specific experiences with being denied our femininity. That is something which you, as a person for whom (as you said) womanhood/femininity was ascribed by the system of patriarchy, cannot understand in the way we do.

[hermetiqa]

ㅤ YOUR NEXT ROMANTIC PARTNER

Reminder: it doesn't matter if you saw this reading a day or a week or a month or a year after posting this. My readings are timeless. You'll see this when you're meant to see this and receive your message.

How to pick a pile: close your eyes and take a deep breath before picking a pile. If you feel drawn to more than one pile, it's alright, you may take the piles that you're drawn to. What's important is to take it how it resonates and leave what doesn't.

Note: please feel free to give me a feedback on my asks about the reading! I would highly appreciate it and it'll be a huge help for me to improve as a reader.

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Their characteristics: They're someone who will cause some significant changes in you, especially in your growth as a someone. They will strive and encourage you to be a better person. They might influence you in making significant changes in your own life, such as moving out to new places and trying out new skills and having new experiences. They will encourage you to move on from the past, and I feel like this person will actually make you move on from your rough past. I don't mean this as if they're your rebound or something, it's just that moving on is natural for them and you could be someone who holds grudges deeply. And because of this, your next romantic partner would be someone who would help you move on, in a healthy way. I feel like you'll feel so safe around them to the point that you'll forget what happened to you in the past and just be grateful that you met this person. This person knows how to balance things in their life. They have all the stuff in their life and they're juggling them to balance them. They have these family and personal matters, then financial matters, their other connections (such as their friends), and then you. I can see that despite how busy they are, they still make time for you and they really manage their time very well, and you admire this in them. They could still be young and you could be young as well, or you and them just have this youthful nature in you. They're logical and private, they could be keeping information to themselves. This might result to them being private of your relationship. Your relationship is the private-but-not-a-secret type of thing. I also see that this person has leadership skills in them and they also radiate confidence. It's like when they walk into a room, everyone would turn around and look at them and just admire them and their confidence. They're a passionate person and they'll be very passionate about your relationship, especially towards you.

Signs: Fire signs (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius), workaholic, goal-oriented, ENTJ, INTJ, ESTJ, music/Spotify playlist, meeting online, social media is very important, private, mysterious on social media, dark/red hair, gym, hiking, surfing

Their characteristics: They're workaholic and they're still trying to get their life together. They could be chaotic or going through a lot of chaos when you meet them. They could have this push-and-pull energy when you meet and it might feel like this relationship/connection won't work because of how chaotic this person is. They're going through a lot of stress and they're just starting to face their responsibilities. Then you came along, which could cause them to feel more stressed and overwhelmed about their situation and their own life as a whole. They're still going through a lot of changes in their life when you meet and everything's all over the place in their life. They're going to move out to their new place (like an apartment) which could be near yours, managing their finances, thinking of resigning in their current job and find a new one. They could have a feminine energy, especially when it comes to you. I feel like they're quite in-touch with their emotions, in a way that they actually sit on their emotions and feel them and process them. They don't suppress them. This is why they could be in a lot of stress and be really overwhelmed when they meet you because they want to commit to you but they don't know how to manage everything. They would want to give you everything but they feel like they couldn't and they might get you involved in their chaotic life. It's like they feel that you'll stress over their life as well and they don't want this to happen. I feel like when you meet, you'll feel that instant connection and be passionate with each other the moment you meet. This might be a one night stand when you meet. And because of this, there might be a lot of confusion in the connection because it started in the way that you don't want. Despite that, this is a genuine connection, though it might take you a while to realize that.

Signs: Fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius), workaholic, goal-oriented, chaotic energy, new apartment, living in the same town/city, winter-spring season, ISTP, INFJ, INFP, ISFP, downtown aesthetic, blonde/brunette, blue eyes, how to lose a guy in 10 days movie

Their characteristics: You might not be fond of each other when you meet and there might even be some conflicts or disagreements especially during the early stages of your connection (not necessarily a relationship). You might see them as someone arrogant and insensitive of other people's feelings. You might be so annoyed of each other's presence and be defensive whenever someone disagrees with the other. This disagreement might feel like a personal attack even if it's not. You both might be young, you could still be students (especially university students). You might be in competition of each other in class and you might get into debates a lot with each other. I feel like you both will enjoy disagreeing with each other's opinions and answers in class even if you actually agree, just to annoy the other. Your classmates/colleagues could even ship you both and tease you from time to time. You might get into the same group together to work on some project and you'll be stuck with each other for quite a while. During this time, you'll get to know each other and realize they're not really who you think they were. They're actually a soft person and you have a lot of similarities with each other. This project will be the best project in the whole class (whole university even) and you'll want to work with each other again next time. I'm seeing that because of this project and you'll start to work more often for the next projects, your connection will start to get deeper. You'll be connected on an emotional level. You'll go from being enemies/academic rivals to being friends, then best friends, then lovers. From being annoyed of each other's presence to looking for each other's presence and laughter and time together. From hating each other and laughing when the other gets hurt (like falling off a chair) to being protective of each other. From denying the teases of other people about you to just accepting them and acting like couples, just like what they're teasing you about. You'll keep spending a lot of time with each other to the point that you'll study together and even stay up really late just to "study". You'll be very patient with each other now. And the rest is history.

Signs: Aries, Sagittarius, Libra, Virgo, Gemini, ESTP, ISTP, ENTP, enemies to lovers trope, academic rivals to lovers, study dates, coffee dates, group project, university, camping, debates, dark hair, wavy hair, dark academia aesthetic, autumn

[luveline]

that spencer x bombshell one you just posted has me giggling and kicking my feet I think I’m in love with YOU 🫵

Now I’m thinking of spencer x bombshell where the team starts to not view reid as unwillingly tortured by her flirting. Like maybe Morgan makes a comment to reid about something he does and is like “don’t torture the poor girl” and he’s like oh shit I’M the one torturing too now?

im in love with YOU !! for you, ty for requesting ♡ fem

“Difficult,” you say, resting your head on the table. 

“I know.” Spencer wiggles his pen back and forth between two fingers, thinking hard. This case is proving to be indecipherable. None of the details want to add up, and no clear profile geographical or otherwise appears. 

“Useless.” 

“Who, me or you?” 

“Us.” You sigh morosely. “Mostly me.” 

You're not being serious. Spencer huffs a soft laugh and continues to turn the details over in his head. You open your notebook and scratch down a couple of sentences with a pen, a visual thinker. Your mind map turns to a second iteration and then a third. You can't connect the dots because they're too far apart from each other; Spencer can't do it either. Not alone. 

He scoots his chair as close to yours as possible, your knees touching, his elbow in your side. “Can I look?” he asks. 

“Of course you can. Sorry about my handwriting.” 

He shakes his head. Your handwriting is perhaps the only thing about you he wouldn't say was one hundred percent perfect. You can't control it like other things. It is perfect, in a way, because it's yours, but you've been writing quickly and he struggles to make out the occasional letter. 

He leans in toward the page. “What's this word?” he asks. 

You lean in to see it. “Coruscated.” 

“The swimming pool?” he asks, lifting his face to yours. You're closer now, and beautiful like this. He can see the powder under your eyes, the lines in your irises, the slight fading of your lipstick at the corners of your mouth. There's an eyelash on your cheek. He lifts a hand to wipe it away. “What's so important about that?” 

“It reminded me of something…” You pause as he touches your face. “Something…” Your voice lilts up in question, half-shudder. 

“Eyelash,” he explains, blowing it off of his finger. 

“Right,” you say, eyes oddly wide and soft at once, your eyebrows lifted at the starts. 

“You okay?” 

“Is she okay? Reid, you're torturing the poor girl. Give her some air,” Morgan says with a chuckle. 

Spencer leans backwards in surprise, no idea what Morgan could possibly mean. Your eyes relax as you regain some personal space, your hands coming together loosely in your lap. You laugh weakly. 

Spencer looks you up and down. He's torturing you? That doesn't make sense. For as long as you've known one another, the team has joked that your flirty ways and feminine wiles are too much for Spencer to handle. You once gave him an apology he didn't want, worried you actually were hurting him by being your playful self, and he'd set that straight immediately. You don't torture him. It's a lot of feelings to be doted on so much by you, and painful isn't one of them. Overwhelming, sometimes, and exciting, sure. 

He never realised he had the power to overwhelm you. Not until that moment. You offer a funny smile far from your usual smirk and try to steamroll Morgan's claim. “Guess I should've made a wish.” 

“What would you wish for?” Spencer asks quietly. 

You still. Morgan shakes his head in disapproval, but he laughs again and stands up. “I think they'd call that a taste of your own medicine, sweetheart,” he says to you. 

You meet Spencer's eye. “I think they would,” you say bashfully. 

For three blissful seconds, Spencer enjoys the reality of having made you flustered. You, gorgeous, confident you, left flushed and a little daunted by his casual actions and simple (maybe slightly flirtatious) questioning. But then he remembers how much he likes you and pushes it away. 

“Sorry,” he says, plastering a smile over uncertain lips, “I didn't mean to do that.” 

“No, it's okay.” 

He turns to your notes, but gives you a look from the side. “I hope you wished for someone to solve the case. We're never getting anywhere like this.” 

“Are you saying you can't?” You rest your chin in your hand. “And here I thought you were more than a pretty face.” 

You have a quick recovery rate, evidently. 

[astrologylunadream]

How Do They Feel About You?🧸🍨🌸 (Pick a card/Tarot love reading)

Hi it's Lunadream! This is an honest reading for the person on your mind and how they feel about you currently~💭 also happy birthday every virgo and libra this month! hope you find your message🪧🩷

Notice: Only take what resonates because the most important thing is your own judgement!♡ If anything doesn't resonate, don't worry! It's not your message right now <3 (Entertainment purpose only. All rights reserved)

Now, shall we begin~? ^w^ Think of the your person, and pick whichever pile that fits the energy you're feeling~🍨🩷🍂

Pile 1☕️

Pile 2🩷

Pile 3🧸

Pile 4🧁

Take your time and choose carefully with the heart~♡

On to the readings —> 💕

Pile 1☕️

Sign energy: Abundance, Build, Myth, Connection, Try, Venus, Jupiter, 12th house, Virgo, Moon,🧜‍♀️❌️🥹🚶‍♀️

🍨Your person's energy: Okay so there is a lot of feminine or gentle masculine energy to this person, their aura is pretty!😊💞 Haha one of the first things I got from this pile is that your person may have a very "voluminous figure" however that resonates for you, they could have a big/taller build, thicker body, or curvy even. Even if they are smaller or shorter in size, I think their energy and impression on others is very big and noticable. They have a nurturing and sweet side to them, also luxurious and earthly kind of beauty🍬 They could be blessed with abundance whether that's phsyical beauty or financial success👑 Signs that may be significant is Libra, Taurus, Sagittarius, Pisces, Virgo, and Cancer placements, Jupiter in 12th house, Venus-Jupiter and Venus-Moon aspects, virgo moon, jupiter in pisces, venus in cancer, virgo or sagittarius on their 12th house so for only some of you this person could be leo or scorpio rising.✨️ The person on your mind has a mysterious allure to them, you guys have a very spiritual and maybe even psychic connection with this person.🔮🩷 I'm hearing "trying to build a connection" that could be you or them, for a few of you the giant X emoji came out this could be an ex some of my pile 1's of asking about. I don't know why I almost said pile 4 lol if you felt called to that pile maybe take a look~👀 Your person has an ethereal vibe honestly, like they are a siren or something.🐚💕 Omg this pile has lyrics and "sweet creature" literally defines your person!! They may have an abundance of feminine energy or just gentle softer energy, you might feel very emotional over this person like this emoji "🥹" or that is how they look like to you, so innocent and caring. The terms "gentle giant" or "big heart" may resonate for your person, lovely energy. This could be a person/connection that you are coming back to or "retrying" so to speak. This person is very emotional and intuitive, overall lots of venus and jupiter energy for this pile!🤗🩷

🩷How do they feel about you: Fan, Acceptance, Sacrifice, Ex lover, Savior, Chiron, 1st house, Juno, 2nd house, Virgo,🪂🏝🦉😍

Wow this is interesting pile 1🙌 I'm not surprised to see ex lover come out which is confirmation for those who this is an ex.🤯 I think they are still in love with you, they can't let it go. For those in this pile this is not an ex, they feel attracted to you romantically. This person may have wounds regarding self image, they might have issues with their phsyical appearance or have low self esteem and there is an energy of wanting to be seen and accepted by you.🪞🥺🩷 You are their savior haha, they only feel loved and accepted by you. My pile 1's have a reliable and considerate energy and I think this person really admires that about you.🥰 I mean the heart eyes emoji came out like that is the feeling you give this person, they feel like the way you treat them and think of them is so nice. They feel like pulled to your caring and helpful nature, which is so sweet!🥹 Specific but some of my pile 4's may be Virgo sun or Virgo placements!✨️ This person wants you, or they just enjoy your company honestly. I can see for a lot of you this is more romantic feelings, your love heals this person.❤️‍🩹🩹 They also feel you are very beautiful/handsome, I'm hearing they are like a loving fan of you. They might feel a little bit codependent with your energy, because you make them feel better so they are a little addicted to the way you make them feel. Lol this person wants your energy around them, they do have a very spiritual vibe to them so that makes sense. My pile 1 this person may be wanting to sacrifice something to be with you/take the next step with you, take it as it resonates.💐 I'll be honest this person could have some attachment issues with you, like as a scenario if this is someone you walked away from, they keep coming back to you and they feel like they can't live without you. I think that is the effect you have on this person.🩷🔙 This person may be keeping an eye on you or taking steps spiritually or phsyically to get closer to you. If there is a third party situation I believe this person is willing to sacrifice others for you only, or they would want you to do that for them. I am getting a very needy energy, do not trust this person if they have a history of lies or manipulation, but for most in this pile there is a soft and genuinely loving energy from them.🥰 Please use your judgement for this person pile 1! Wow this pile got long, they feel very strong energetic connection with you.🫣🩷

Thank you my pile 1's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!💬

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 1 with the coffee emoji~☕️ Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🍨🍂🌸

Pile 2🩷

Sign energy: Guard, Collarbone, Difficult, Appreciation, Gaze, South node, Sagittarius, Sun, North node, 12th house,🤙🖥🕺🤞

🍨Your person's energy: Alright for this person, they may have had a difficult past or gone through a lot.😓 I feel a slightly drained energy, but it's not completely hopeless I think this person is still optimistic and doesn't let their past hurt them or destroy them. I'm hearing "gazing to the future" they have that mentality, that no matter what they will keep looking forward🌟⏳️ Wow honestly this person has such a bright mentality despite the darkness lurking in them. They may hide pain or fear behind their smile and confidence. Specific message this person could work as a security guard but for the most part that is just their energy which is defensive and even guarded at the moment.⚔️ They could be a Sagittarius sun, or pisces, jupiter placements, jupiter in sagittarius, north node in 12th house, sagittarius north node, jupiter dominant aswell so any of those may resonate.😊🩷 This person is hoping for the best, like they have their fingers crossed that things will work out for them. Their collarbone may be noticable, also their gaze is bright and determined.🤭🏆 Some of you may have fell out of connection with this person or the contact is distant or limited. They have a fun energy at times, they try to enjoy things. TV may be significant here, also dancing. Lol seems like they would be fun and hilarious at parties.🎉🪩 This person may have dreamed of being on tv or earning grand achievements. For some I'm seeing famous athlete or comedian, or having their own tv show😂 It seems like the past and future are very big themes in this person's energy, they might be going through a hard time or went through a rough patch until they can finally achieve true happiness and their ideal future. They are ambitious but also humble and they are thankful for every inch they have come in life.🥇

🩷How do they feel about you: Suffer, Moon, Habits, Performance, Play, 9th house, 7th house, 6th house, Fire, Saturn,👣😔😘👩‍🍳

So it looks like this person has lots of emotions towards my pile 2's! It's like they want to do their best in front of you, you make them nervous😬💓 Honestly this person may suffer a lot from feeling like they can't mess up or fail at your gaze, funny because gaze came out before now I see why. This person feels like you are a tough crowd, omg like they're so afraid of being awkward or embarrassing themselves around you🥲 I'm hearing they don't want to look like a clown to you🤡😭😭 lol pile 2 you make this person trip over themselves secretly and they don't want you to see it! I think your opinion means a lot to them for whatever reason, which they put a lot of pressure on themselves for. Omg this person just wants to be appreciated🥺🩷 Also they could act playful around you or they wish they could be that way, but they come off awkward or can't. They might have a crush and interest in dating you or just building a closer emotional bond with you.💐🔗 For some reason I'm feelings like theatre may resonate for some in this pile.🎭 Oh and this person may put on an act to appear a certain way to you, like acting tough, funny, like your best friend, or any way to be more likable.☹️ Yeah it just feels like this person really worries how you see them, they want to keep their relationship with you. They try so hard to be admirable, also they might even cry because they feel like a failure.😓💔 They want to keep up a good performance whether that is at work, school or just in a relationship with you. They feel like you might walk away, like the way an audience walks away from a show. Lol I feel like this person loves watching tv entertainment😂 But yeah they want to leave a good impression on you, honestly pile 2 it feels like this person does think of you often. They might be hoping for a romantic relationship with you or just your appreciation/validation at least.😢💗 They are feeling pretty stuck right now, but they are perfecting themselves and trying to gain more confidence in order to approach you. Such an interesting pile, I wish you luck my lovely pile 2's🌟

Thank you my pile 2's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!💬

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 2 with the pink heart emoji~🩷 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🍨🍂🌸

Pile 3🧸

Sign energy: True intentions, Stop, Listen, Self sabotage, Mixed feelings, Jupiter, Fire, 12th house, 2nd house, Neptune,🗣🪷🙏☁️

🍨Your person's energy: Okay so if this is your pile, the person on your mind is very confusing and hard to read. It's unclear what they want or feel, you may wish they would just stop and listen to you. I think this person has a lot of personal issues honestly, they aren't kind to themselves and they don't open up to the signs that are yelling out to them😥🪧 I feel like my pile 3's are very spiritual people but this person may be resistant to spirituality or any signs from the universe. This person has been refusing to acknowledge your energy, sabotaging themselves as well as their connection with you.🔮❌️ Possible placements could be a Sagittarius, Pisces, or Taurus, Jupiter in 12th house, jupiter conjunct neptune, jupiter in a fire sign, also fire in 12th house. Praying and Lotus may be significant, especially in terms of spirituality. Honestly this pile is so complex, lol it's giving 12th house synastry. I feel like some of you may not really truly know this person's deepest self, like their true nature. This person may be silent with you right now, and for some in this pile they even ghosted you.🔇 Could be a no contact situation, or honestly this person just isn't communicating or being honest wtf? I feel like maybe you've tried to get through to them or try to understand them but their energy is just like ✋️🙄 Feels unavailable lol what is up with this person? Very very confusing vibes to this person. Their intentions and feelings are just hard to read, hence why you are here I'm sure.😅😭 I love you pile 3. I'm trying to see any more details about this person but it is just thick with clouds tbh. I'm hearing "clouded judgement" that could resonate with this person or situation, this person could have a spiritual awakening soon. You may feel unseen by them, overlooked, ignored or mislead. This person is sending mixed signals, they are distant af right now.

🩷How do they feel about you: No contact, End, Matchmaker, Move, Mirror, Juno, Cancer, 7th house, 6th house, Fire⭐️👆🕵️‍♂️🫶

Okay so for those of you who thought this connection was hopeless or not going anywhere, there is light at the end of the tunnel. So despite the emotional distance/no contact between you both, this person wants to make a commitment to you.🔒💗 For a lot of my pile 3's that means they view you as an idea romantic partner for them, and their energy wants to move forward with you.💐 This person does not want things to end between you both, that's what is coming through. Honestly this person sees you as their perfect match, I had to mention that because there is a lot of partnership energy here and with Mirror it feels like to this person, you are their other half. Serious pile 3 and the heart hands emoji is so sweet they want to take the next step with you.🥺💍💞 This could manifest in many different ways, for those who are in a relationship with this person they wish to propose or take your relationship to the next level.🩷 This person feels very attached to you energetically, like you belong with them. I'm hearing "home is where you are"😥🫂 There is also signs of a twin flame situation here for whoever that resonates to. They are surprisingly decisive about what kind of relationship they want with you now, there was a very messy and confusing energy before but now it is pretty clear.🤯 It feels like they have made up their mind about you already.🧠✔️ This person feels like you are the one for them, someone they could easily love for the rest of their life. They feel comfortable with your energy, also they want to end your sorrows and emotional burdens.😢 They feel your energy like a bright burning star, warming them up inside of their soul. For some of you this person is watching you from a distance which could be spiritually or phsyically depending on their availability.🔍🔭💕 They feel divinely guided to you, I'm hearing "I can make this work" hmm. This person may have been comfortable holding back or doing nothing in this connection but they realized that it can't go on like that anymore so they are putting a stop to what may have felt like lack of effort or inactivity towards your relationship.🫥🩶 Oh my gosh this makes sense because earlier in their energy it was like they were sabotaging their connection with you. Yeah so this person is having a realization now, all I'm hearing is they honestly want YOU, they want to move forward and make decisions that will support and advance this exclusive bond you guys share together.💗🥺 Wow.

Thank you my pile 3's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!💬

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 3 with the teddy bear emoji~🧸 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🍨🍂🌸

Pile 4🧁

Sign energy: Physical, Style, Aura, Destruction, Juno, 7th house, Scorpio, Neptune, 10th house,🩻🎀🌶🔑

🍨Your person's energy: Hmm okay interesting, so this person may be wrecking your mind lol😂 This person is either making you lose your mind or that is the effect they have on others subtly. Ngl this person has a hot energy🥵 Very deep and they make you want to fantastize... so anyway, your person has very attractive or pretty features. They could be physically attractive or appealing in some way.🩷 Okay for some of you this person could be your phsyical ideal type, or they look like someone you would want to marry. You find them really cute in some ways but also really hot in other ways, either this person has two sides or you see them that way.🎀🖤 Their energy can be very masculine or very feminine depending on their mood, there is a lot of romantic feelings towards this person!🤭💌 Signs for them could be Libra, Scorpio, Pisces, Capricorn, Juno in 7th house, scorpio neptune, neptune in 12th house, Juno in 10th house, Their energy feels very scorpio but they don't have to even have those placements. Something about this person is just mysterious and alluring, they could look very fashionable or their demeanor is edgy and cool/pretty.👑🩷 Their bones may be noticable, I feel like this person is sought after or people are secretly intimidated and obsessed with their presence. They could be a bit of a loner or they give off cold/aloof vibes at first glance, some of my pile 4's may look up to them I'm hearing "inspiration.✨️ This is just one example but like say this person has really good style and you admire that and wish you could match their vibe, that may resonate for some here.🛍 This could also simply be their captivating aura that seems so chill and attractive, little things you admire about this person. There is a very deep, sensual energy to this person, it's kinda giving scorpio rising in the way that this person makes others attracted and scared at the same time.😳 The effect the have on people reminds me of lilith placements. Their energy pulls you in, it's just magnetic and admirable. This person may give off an impression of looking dangerous or just hard to approach, either because they're pretty or drop dead gorgeous (lol why am I hearing monster high from the 2010's😂🖤) Their lower body is really showing up for this energy, um maybe that is something significant about them?😳🫣

🩷How do they feel about you: Luck, Cinderella, Responsibility, Work place, Trial and error, 3rd house, Pluto, Aries, 6th house, Leo,🤐🪞🫰👠

Alright this is where it gets interesting👏 So this person feels that you are working hard, or just you pick yourself up every time you fail. Some of you are really obsessive over this person, they feel that energy from you.💭👀🔗 This person sees you as someone very lucky, but only if you put forth effort. It feels like they are watching you stumble through every obstacle in your life, you intrigue them.💡 They might see you as someone a bit naive and maybe even seeming foolish, but you don't give up and they notice how strong you are.🥺✊️💖 Some of my pile 4's may know this person from work, but I only see that for a few of you. Their first impression of you may have been that you don't take things seriously or unprepared for whatever reason, but their view is now the total opposite. This person has a certain admiration towards you, it's like a pleasant surprise kind of feeling. They feel like you have proved yourself worthy for whatever it is you want in life.🏆🙌 I think they want you to be proud of how much you have accomplished, oh you know when I said you may feel inspired by this person, I think they feel the same way about you🥹🩷 That is sweet, It may have felt like this person looks down on you or they think they're out of your league. But this person feels like you are deserving, they feel like you have earned your place. This person is proud of you, and they might see themselves in you. If you feel like a failure to this person, they want to remind you how strong and amazing you are.🌟🤗 Honestly I am seeing this is someone who is staying silent or not able to speak with you right now, they could be keeping their words to themselves to keep from gossip or misunderstandings.🗣💬 You make this person very curious, they think you're interesting and entertaining. This person feels a powerful presence from you, like you seem passionate and ambitous in their eyes. They think you're attractive and energetic, but also they might feel like you're a little clumsy or chaotic sometimes.😅 Someone who has stumbled through a lot, they like your determination and will. It's like you have went through a transformation, they feel as if they have watched your energy shift from rags to riches.👑💞✨️ I think for the most part this person is interested to see where you go in life, they could be phsyically or energetically watching you reach your true potential and success with a smile. Such an inspiring message for this pile.😭

Thank you my pile 4's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!💬

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 4 with the cupcake emoji~🧁 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🍨🍂🌸

Wanna see more readings like this? Check out my tumblr for accurate readings for you!💗🌊🌸

Thanks for reading! \(*^w^)/💌 -Lunadream <3

[punksocks]

Lilith & His Femme Fatale (18+ Only)

**I tried to make this general but it’s about seduction, I couldn’t pull it lol (fr minors dni!)

*Just based on my observations, only take what resonates

Often Lilith in a man’s birth chart gives less information on him and more information on the type of woman that’s his femme fatale. The type of femme that gives this complex dynamic to the relationship. I would say, similarly to Plutonian influences, this sort of connection charged with such intensity tends to elicit the extreme reaction of either repelling him or making him at least a bit obsessed with finding a way to “obtain” the Lilith person in the relationship.

I think this is always related to Lilith’s folklore of being the untamable wife. He loves her because he can’t control her. But he still wants to try (not always but often imo). Not being able to control her and her seeming so wild and free is one of the many reasons the Lilith person usually brings out the shadow side of the masc person in their connection.

(I think everyone, men/women/enbys/etc, all tend to act out of feminine and masculine energies. The energies of giving and receiving. Action and reaction. Lilith usually throws some upheaval into this because as an untraditional feminine she embodies it all. She dominates whilst not taking any action. Lilith’s sort of chaotic energy throws a wrench in the binary imo. She’s feminine but the effect she has on and within others often puts her outside of the spectrum. I’m speaking about the effect on masculine folks because I believe Lilith pushes them into a power struggle mindset due to her effects and due to our society -and Lilith’s origins- being very patriarchal. With traditional feminine energies there is also a power struggle effect but it’s more like rooted in the feminine power. Like women usually have a default role of using subservience to their advantage- as much as they can- under patriarchy. So the tension with people embodying Lilith manifests in this tension of trying to make the Lilith people conform or outcasting them. There can be underlying s*xual dynamics to this but it usually works out differently/less directly than it does with masc folks.)

Anyway that’s why I believe men/masc people react in such a charged/obsessed way to Lilith energy and why I think it tends to result in this sort of femme fatale dynamic. Now let’s get into it !

-Lilith in Aries: For Lilith in Aries, he’d love an unstoppable woman. Like I noted before (in credit to @zeldasnotes ) this is a strong indicator of a man being a feminist (we love to see it). So this could also indicate a strong attraction to someone that’s in their power, that holds their own, and that is very independent and strong in their own right. He may find himself pushing back on this type of femme, but being impressed and compelled by her when she does take the lead (his mars could show how this dynamic would play out). (You may find yourselves vying for dominance in the connection)

-Lilith in Taurus: A hyperfeminine woman. Obviously, femininity looks different across cultures, but some traits that could show up here would be: a woman with curves, a killer hourglass figure that turns heads; a woman that seems luxurious and well dressed; a woman that feels soft and smells great. Essentially being a Venusian sign, Taurus in Lilith would be absolutely smitten by a beautiful woman that embodied all that soft feminine energy (and took his money lol) (speaking of which, could be a s*x worker or trophy wife type- someone that needs a lot of money/luxury to keep around)

-Lilith in Gemini: A thinker, a woman that outwits you. Someone that keeps you mentally stimulated by challenged your knowledge. Someone that will always make you guess. Very book smart, may be curious about the taboo. Someone that gets their kicks from debating you and testing your textbook knowledge. May also be smitten by dirty talk, talking about the taboo in their intimate time together.

-Lilith in Cancer: A nostalgic nurturer that makes you feel at ease. May embody the bad traits that make you feel especially vulnerable (like familiar toxic behavior). Lilith’ archetype is often an antithesis of cancer’s traditional influence of being the emotional nurturer, so we’d have to assume a bit of corruption here. Just as easily as you could be fueling toxic behavior I’d assume you’d just as easily receive it. So mascs can project onto you and desire to leech off of your nurturing energy.

-Lilith in Leo: A diva. The one that’s in the spotlight without trying at all. Like a burlesque dancer, beautiful and radiant and practically untouchable. Speaking of which they may be smitten with a femme known for her s*x appeal. Whether that’s from having a lot of past partners or being a model or being in s*x work depends on the situation. The Leo person would likely want exclusive access to you after they get their hands on you though (fixed placements can be very possessive, it’s a whole thing)

-Lilith in Virgo: someone with their life together. (I said what I said 👀). A sort of that girl as the kids say :0. She has a meal plan and a routine and a 5 year plan. I’d also wager that this placement is the most likely to have a thing for someone that has their shit so together that it makes the native feel less than. Someone that could shame them and make them feel flawed and insignificant at the drop of a hat (a hat? The hat? Ok). Also likely to be someone that is really subtle but quietly freaky. A good candidate for workplace affairs 🤷🏾‍♀️

-Lilith in Libra: a bombshell babe, a true beauty. Someone who embodies very classy energy. A popular girl, one that you sort of have to work to get the attention of. (A gorgeous femme that distracts others with how beautiful and effortless she is. Pinup material and just as untouchable. Trophy wife vibes but not as intense as Lilith in Taurus (unless this is a 2nd house placement 👀). Also someone that brings a lot of balance and beauty to their surroundings. (She may attract envy due to her looks as well)

-Lilith in Scorpio: S*x personified. Someone with that intense vibe (one of the most likely placements to attract Lilith heavy femmes). Someone that has a presence that holds a lot of power. And a lot of intimate experience or at least a fearless attitude about those taboos. Someone that makes him want to explore those fantasies as a knee jerk reaction (within reason ofc). Someone that can see right through him. Someone that they struggle to gain power over. (Also pretty likely to have a power imbalance or some sort of taboo attached to the dynamic)

-Lilith in Sagittarius: A traveler, a girl struck with wanderlust. Someone you get attached to even though she’s always out of reach. Someone who loves debating and adventure. A philosopher that never stops learning and daring you to broaden your horizons. May be someone from outside of your culture as well. Or someone with a religious background you find socially taboo.

-Lilith in Capricorn: Boss babe all the way. Someone that intimidates others easily and that works very hard. A social climber. A person that knows exactly what they’re after, in that go getter sort of way. Someone mature. Lady in the streets, freak in the sheets. Another possibly of meeting at work, or at least after some sort of public interaction. Another connection where both people are likely vying for dominance. Likely to have themes of restriction show up as well.

-Lilith in Aquarius: manic👏🏾 pixie 👏🏾dream👏🏾 girl👏🏾 (I’m dead*ss). The quirky girl that stands out from the crowd. One of kind in a rebellious way. The other side of fae energy, which is to say that she would be a detached trickster of sorts. Hard to predict, philosophically outside of your comfort zone, impossible to pin down, etc. Someone that forces you to think outside of the box- whether you like it or not. Could bring out the k*nkier side of you. Also pretty likely to bring out the nerdier side of you, for some reason. (Aquarius intelligence ??)

-Lilith in Pisces: fae bae, full stop. A girl like a daydream. Esoteric and ethereal. A person that may be a bit spacey but they’re off floating in space somewhere. Someone creative and subconsciously addictive. Someone that tends to appear in their dreams and tends to be on their minds a lot.

Further Notes:

-Air is most impressed upon by intelligence and uniqueness; water by an emotionally immersive and passionate connection; fire by passion and being dazzled by the person; earth by their material luxury, ambition, and physicality

-water and fire tend to become obsessive over s*xual connections the fastest imo, but it can really mentally affect air and earth placements (it’s that I’m not obsessed but they’re thinking about them all the time and doing god knows what about that 👀)

-fixed Lilith placements can make a masc person a bit more obsessive and possessive over the Lilith energy (especially if they have a fixed Venus/mars)

-Cardinal Lilith placements tend to like to be challenged over taking the lead/dominance in the connection, if underdeveloped they can be rather controlling to their partners as well

-When Lilith is close to a masc’s personal planets I’d say that he may have some sort of archetype/karmic lesson around Lilith heavy femmes (just a significant impact on his life and attitude)

-Houses can show how these energies connect (I wrote this up but the draft deleted itself and I just couldn’t lol 🙃)

[cavegirlpoems]

Violet Core Approaches

So. My close friend and collaborator Sarah Carapace has been working on Violet Core - a ttrpg about dykey mecha pilots in space - for the past few years, and that work is approaching its fruition. It's about to get kickstarted pretty soon, and I got a preview copy of the game ahead of that. So, preview/review I shall.

Disclaimers: I'm close friends with Sarah, was involved in some of the early playtests, and might end up doing a stretch goal for the game. So, I am of course wildly biased in Sarah's favour. Still, even if I wasn't, I figure this'd be my jam.

TL,DR: This game is really really good, back the kickstarter. For more details, read on.

The Basics:

Violet Core is set in the Nemesis System, an alternate scifi version of the solar system. The game follows the lives of spacers cut off from their home planet, Cerulea, as they face an oncoming disaster as escalating waves of comet-storms hit the system and everything starts to come apart.

Our characters are mech pilots for one of three factions of spacers - The Reach, The Homebound, and The Cosmic Embrace - each with their own perspective on what to do about the looming disaster. It's generally agreed that they need to escape, but where to and how is a source of conflict.

All three factions and their approaches have their merits. Although the Reach are positioned as more heirarchical and organised than the other two, all three are clearly scrappy tenacious punk-ish survivors who've been rejected and exiled to space by the dickhead bourgoisie of their home planet, Cerulea.

Luckily, you get to pilot X-10s, giant personalised mechs powered by a mysterious psycho-active (psychic?) crysteline core. This lets you get up to all the various activities you just pictured when I said that.

Tonally, it's Sarah Carapace through-and-through. Everything is purple and blocky, with CRT monitors and snaking cables and spray-paint. Riot Grrl mashed up with retro scifi mashed up with cosmic weirdness.

On The Humble D4

The game uses the oddity of dice - the humble D4 - as its main dice, with D8s scattered in here and there. It's a choice I really like, giving the game a feel that's a little angular and off-centre. It's a simple choice, but it does a lot to set it apart. I can't sum this up better than Sarah does, so I'll just quote her:

d4s are the most cursed of all dice.

They are awkward to roll.

They are pointy and can/will stab you.

Femininity is pointy, painful and powerful and so are these odd little polyhedrons.

Also, There is no standardised style for d4s. When you roll them, the result is the number displayed upright, either on the top or bottom. It varies from die to die.

Which I think gives you a good sense of the tone of the whole game, y'know?

The game cares about dice as physical objects deeply. Players can use the emotional connections between their characters to donate bonus dice to another character's rolls: the game suggests that when you do, you should pass her your physical dice, and use the motion of how you do it (including potentially how your hand touches hers as you hand them over) as a way of expressing the connections between characters, which is a fucking genius bit of design.

Anyway. Who do you play as?

Some sort of dykey space-gal x-10 pilot. To define who you are, you pick three things: the faction you belong to, your pilot type, and the X-10 you pilot. I'll go over each in quick succession.

Your faction determines your political alliance and likely goals, and the culture you grew up in, and each faction has access to a different set of X-10s. You pick between:

The Reach: the most organised and strict faction, and the oldest. Strict, heirarchical, and high-tech. You play here if you want to have a good The Man to chafe against, or to be that The Man for somebody else. The Reach are working on engineering humanity to be able to survive the coming disaster and thrive in space, and building a vast engine - the Overlock - to enable this.

The Homebound: the most rough-and-ready faction. A large population of working-class gals, and with too few resources to go around. They're working on repairing a giant machine, The Sling, to transport their people to another star system and flee the coming disaster. Unfortunately, The Sling and The Overlock are both adaptations of the same machine...

The Cosmic Embrace: the weirdo faction. The smallest, most mystic, and overall hippy-est. Short on space, people, and resources, but not on idealism and enthusiasm. They're poking the weird shit of the setting, and getting results. A little culty. In the playtest I was in, I played Cosmic Embrace, obviously.

Notably, you can have PCs all be in the same faction, or be split between them. If split, there's lines of conflict, but also room for alliances and subterfuge. PCs can, and might well, switch faction in play.

As well as your faction, you pick your pilot type. There's three broad types of pilots you can be:

Genebuilt, artificially created super-pilots with custom genetics to make them good in space. Divided into two rough types; the Violet Kind (for if you were a successful project, and inhereted mysterious abilities) or the Rat Bitch (for if you... weren't, and mostly just inhereted emotional issues). There's some interesting space to play with the idea of nature vs nurture here, or with the pressure of expectation.

Baseliners, aka normal humans who haven't been genetically engineered or tinkered with. Again, divided into two types; the Shining Star (for if you're keeping up with the best through sheer talent and training) and the Baseline Breaker (for if you're a normal person getting by with determination and adaptability.

And then, lastly, the Returned. People who died - or nearly died - and were brought back. The character creation section only mentions one sort of Rebuilt - the Returned, who have been remade by the power of humans science - but hints that other sorts might exist. And indeed they do, tied to the mysteries of the setting.

I ended up playing a Rat Bitch, who'd seen her best buddy get horribly fucked up in a training exercise and gone awol. It was great fun.

Lastly, your X-10. Each faction has three models of X-10, divided by function: Warriors to be brutal front-line fighters, Rogues to be mobile scout-types, and Witches that do weird shit and fight at range. Out of these, each faction has its own version of each of these archetypes. Some X-10 models are pretty common and mass-produced (like the Ogress, the Reach's warrior-frame), and some are rare or even unique (like the Hag, the homebound's rare and experimental Witch type that can fuck with time and space).

Each X-10 has its own Violet Core, the psychoactive crystal that's at the heart of the mech and gives the game it's name. Thoughts from the violet core filter through to the pilot, and visa versa. If you pilot a Hag for long, you'll start thinking Haggish thoughts, and your own emotions will start to seep into the core. It can get real strange real fast.

Each type of X-10 feels and plays extremely differently, in a way I personally found made your choice of frame a reflection of your pilot's personality. My pilot ended up in a Mermaid - the Cosmic Embrace's version of a Witch frame - that had the ability to shift space around it (her?), and 'swim' out of the normal world into sub-space. Which brings me to...

The Spaces & The Mysteries

As well as the material, mundane world - what Violet Core terms 'top-space' - there are two other spaces that exist.

Sub-space is a serene, empty (is it?) realm that lies below top-space. You can dive into sub-space in the right X-10s, and explore. Time and space are wierd and fluid here. If you dive deeply, you find... things. If you dive too deep, you might not come back the same, or at all. There are mysteries down there. Remember I mentioned there are other types of Returned you might become? Yeah. Remember those Violet Cores that power your X-10s? They're made from something called 'the fingers' found deep down in sub-space. Who's fingers? You see where I'm going with this.

There's also The Violet Realm. This is the psycho-sphere, the realm of dreams and emotions and mystical experiences. The violet core of your X-10 links you to the Violet Realm. You can meditate to experience it, to commune with what's within...

This is a setting with mysteries. There are things to explore, forces and powers beneath the surface. I won't elaborate. Partly because I don't want to spoil the discovery for you, and partly because I don't want to read it all and spoil myself before I can play this again. What I will say is that the bits I did read ahead on give you a lot to explore, and are explained in a way that make how they tie into the wider setting and plot. It's all coming together into something impressive.

Personally, as a player of rpgs (larp and ttrpg) I really enjoy settings which present you with mysteries and mysticism, which let you explore the underlying nature of this universe in ways that are at times rational and at times intuitive or mystical. It's an itch few other ttrpgs have scratched for me. Lacuna and Orpheus were, until now, games that achieved what I wanted; now I get to add a third game to the list in Violet Core.

In case it wasn't clear, this is high praise. This is extremely high praise.

Mechanics

I'm going to assume you're already sold. If you aren't, let me make a statement:

I'm mad I didn't think of these game mechanics.

The core engine is pools of d4s, in a way I believe is drawn from forged in the dark. However, unlike FitD, I really like how VC handles its rolls. Particularly - as I mentioned above - the way players can pull on the connections between PCs to offer each other dice, and the way this affects the game.

The core is pretty simple but has nuance. There are PbtA-style moves - things like Negotiate, or Hurt, or Shield - that trigger when you do a particular thing. You roll, and get a codified result based on the result. When you roll, you get a number of dice depending on how you're going about it. In person, you use your talents; things like Making Out and Using Your Head. In your X-10, you use the X-10's talents, things like Synchronising and Drawing Near. An example: You're piloting a Mermaid, and you see your friend (piloting an Ogress) is about to be struck by spiraling comet shards. To save her, you dive across to pull her out of top-space and into sub-space with you, dipping out of the material world to avoid the hazard. Since pulling somebody into Sub-space with your X-10 is Draw Near, you roll as many d4s as your Draw Near pool, and count how many hits you get. Since you're trying to protect somebody, you take that result and look at the Shield move to see what happens.

It's a simple core that's then built on with more detail, giving it a lot of room for nuance and expression.

Further, there's a neat little system for tracking the emotional connections between PCs and how they escalate over time. As they escalate, you pick statements to describe how you feel, pinning down the nature of the relationship, that will get deeper and more intense the further in you get. And the further in you get, the more potent it is when you hand another player your dice to assist her PC.

In play its such a neat, deep, evocative system that it made me really mad I didn't think of it myself. It's basically perfect.

Sorties, in which our cosmic purple space robots punch each other

Up front. Although your in giant space-mechs with giant space-weapons, combat isn't meant to be lethal and horrid. It's intense, and gritty, and emotional raw, but in the way that a bloody-knuckled fist-fight is, not in the way that a shootout is.

Fights aren't war. They're personal.

There's a lot of dancing metaphors in how the fights are described. You might be sparring or actually seriously going after each other, but either way, a fight is an interplay between two characters at their most intense. That thing where a fight scene serves the same purpose as a musical number? Yeah, that.

So. Each fight between X-10s is a Sortie. A sortie is divided into a series of steps, and at each step you pick an option for how you're fighting;

Lead, to be agressive

Sway, to be fluid and fucky

Follow, to be evasive

Sway hits follow, Follow hits lead, Lead hits sway. Its a rock-paper-scissors cycle. (If you get two Leads, both hit, and if you get two follows or sways, both miss.)

When you hit, you can trigger one of the moves as a result. It can get ugly and painful. It could concievably get vulnerable and emotional.

Critically, you have a limited pool of lead/sway/follow actions (depending on your X-10), that get used up as you use them in steps. IE: if you're piloting a Witch, you can use Sway twice and Lead & Follow once. So, you can count what you're opponent's used up, and predict their moves based on what they've got left. In really long sorties, once you've only got one option left to you, it resets.

A sortie is a sort of dance as you maneuver for the advantageous position, use that to fuck with your oponent, and get your fists bruised.

Damage to your X-10 can bleed through to you. Contact between two X-10s can bleed through to their pilots. Things can get strange, particularly when there's Witch X-10s involved.

I'm gonna quote the book again here:

Not all pilots fight to win. Some pilots fight to hurt.

The Gay Bits

As you might have realised by now, it's a really fucking sapphic game. Not as a focus, but in the way where all our PCs are assumed to be some sort of dykey queer type because that's just the kinda tone we're going for.

To misquote Sarah's fellow aussie: "This is my book motherfucker, they'll walk be lesbians if I tell them to".

Pulling It All Together

Tonally, it's a fucking slam dunk. The world bleeds with a very specific atmosphere, a sort of dykey grungey weirdness that draws on old late-80s to early-90s mecha anime, and Heaven Will Be Mine, and weird scifi.

The writing has a really strong voice. Sarah doesn't write like a typical clinical dispassionate ttrpg text, she writes like Sarah. There's little witicisms, emotional bits, slang. It reads like somebody passionately explaining how to play in person.

There's a lot of snippets of in-character text - chat logs, reports, records, recordings - that give you a sense of the sort of people in this world.

The art is all fucking gorgeous. Mostly Sarah art, with some guest spots.

It is extremely purple, so purple its even in the name.

In conclusion:

Listen I am wildly biased because I've been friends with Sarah for yonks, but even if I wasn't I'd be incredibly enthusiastic about this game because:

a) it seems to have been carefully fine-tuned to hit my tastes.

b) it's really fucking good. Really fucking good.

It's an idiosyncratic personal work that also has a huge cosmic scope to it. It fucks around with the medium of dice-based ttrpgs in interesting ways. It's gorgeously written. It's got a setting that makes me want to dive in and explore it.

You should go back the kickstarter when it goes live, and tell your friends about it, and I am not kidding. If this game isn't a wild success there is something wrong with indie ttrpgs. The kickstarter is here, I believe it's due to go live in a couple of days.

If any bloggers are interested in getting a preview copy of their own, hit me up and I can hit up Sarah and we can sort things out.

[just-a-ghost00]

Who has a secret crush on you?

Right before I started the readings, I just had this song playing in the back of my mind on loop so I thought maybe it was relevant to all groups. I will try to get as many details as I can to help you figure out who this is.

Group 1

Tarot | 10 of cups, 9 of cups, Knight of cups, 9 of pentacles, Queen of cups

My god there's a lot of water energy here. I wouldn't be surprised if this person had a water sign in their big three (Sun, Moon, Rising). This person just loves you so much, this is so cute. This is someone that is incredibly gentle and sweet. They speak kindly to you, they always take their time and make sure you're okay, they have no problem expressing their feelings in general but I feel like they may get really shy around you. This is someone that, in a friend group, has a very mature and parental energy. They're the kind to make sure everyone gets home safe, to tell their friends to send them a text when they're home and stuff like that. If people get drunk they'll watch over them quietly. I feel like if this person identifies as a man, they have a lot of feminine energy and women feel super safe around them. They may have a lot of girl friends because of that. They're just incredibly nurturing and giving. Their heart is so pure. This is someone that may be described as naive or too kind by others. This person is just in their own world, doing their own thing, loving everybody and wishing them well. I'm getting the message that this person could be a part of your friend group. You most likely already know them. This could be someone you also have a crush on. You could share a lot of common dreams and aspirations with this person, or you have common hobbies. Seeing how emotional this person appears to be, this could be someone that is pretty empathetic and sensitive. They may easily tear up, feel worried about other's situation. Like let's say they learn a friend's pet has passed on, this person would easily cry over the passing of the pet. Children may like this person a lot because of how kind and genuine they are. This is someone that tends to be alone, though they can be pretty sociable. For some reason, this person just likes their peace and quiet. They love every body dearly but I feel like they find it hard to find people that they really match with emotionally. This person needs depth in connections. This may be someone that likes to grab a drink with friends from time to time, after work or during the holidays to catch up and just relax. This is someone that is extremely patient, hard working and because of that they tend to be succesful in what they do, no matter what it is.

You may feel deeply connected with this person emotionally. They may bring out your inner child a lot and one way to identify this person would be that when you're around them you just feel so at peace and safe that you tend to "overshare". Like you may tell them about past memories nobody knows of, talk to them about your fears or your wildest dreams, share with them your quirky side. And because this person is just so kind and accepting, it encourages you to open up more and let it all out. You may feel unhinged with them because they naturally create a safe space for you to be yourself. You just have a lot of fun with them and they make you laugh and smile a lot. I really feel like they may already have expressed that they liked you. But for some reason maybe things didn't take off or their confession went unnoticed. Maybe at the time you didn't believe them and so you brushed it away. Or maybe it was the other way around. You confessed your feelings and they didn't react. But with time they fell in love with you. This is someone that you may have partied with or celebrated some kind of event. With the 9 of pentacles, I got that college graduation vibe for some reason. So that may be relevant to some of you. But more than that, I feel like you and this person just bonded over some sort of learning. Like maybe you witnessed each other's growth and supported each other and so you kinda rejoiced together about your respective progress. This really feels like a friendly connection that's evolving into a romantic one. This person is really playful and romantic and also very subtle with how they interact with you. They don't feel pushy at all, which maybe kinda confuses you because to you it feels like the limit between their friendliness and flirtiness is too blurry. But maybe that's just part of this person's love language and dating style. This person needs to have a partner that is like a best friend. They want to create a solid bond with you before they dive deeper and so they try to be your friend first. Maybe they feel like if they become too passionate too soon the love will just die out eventually.

Oracle cards | The Seeker, Versatility, Destruction rx, Death, Love & Emerald, Azurite, Amethyst

This person has been through a lot of heartbreaks in their life, which you may or may not know. They are very vulnerable. They just understand that life is all about change and there is no point in resisting it. They've learned that the hard way. This is someone that now goes with the flow and goes through life with an open heart and an open mind. They just want to love and be loved. Again, I get a lot of water sign energy here, especially Scorpio. They wear their heart on their sleeve. Honestly, I would be surprised if you didn't know this person but most importantly I feel like their interest in you is just too obvious. It's not even a secret anymore at this point. I feel like this person is just not good at lying or pretending. Their facial expressions are a dead give away. Like, when they're around you they just can't control their smile or their gaze automatically sets on you. They have that spark that you just can't mistake. If you were doubting someone's feelings for you, I feel like you shouldn't second guess them because they're genuinely fond of you. With the color theme of the three crystal cards, I got a bisexual vibe from this person. Maybe this isn't something that they openly express, maybe they aren't even fully aware of their own preferences but I feel like this person just loves people in general and would be okay with loving men and women alike as long as the feelings are mutual. So maybe if you know this person and you know this fact about them, it could be a confirmation sign for you. Other than that, I get a very spiritual vibe from them. They have a lot of love to give and they strive to be a good person. Other signs that were mentioned in these cards were Leo and Pisces. This person could be described as a hopeless romantic, dreamy, meditative, authentic, naturally beautiful. There's just something that's very fluid and light about them. Like they just take things and people as they come and go.

Confirmation signs : -> number 9, stars, ravens, red, pastel colors (pink/blue/purple), letters D & A, Scorpio, Pisces, Leo, Come as you are by Nirvana, LBGTQIA+, teeth, butterflies, owls

Group 2

Tarot | Knight of pentacles, 10 of pentacles, The Star, 6 of wands, 6 of pentacles, king of swords, back of the deck 8 of swords

This person has a very sharp mind and is laser focused on their career and what they wish to achieve in life. They tend to worry a lot about the future and overthink. They may currently in a phase where they feel like they’re creatively blocked or things aren’t progressing as they wish. They tend to be in their own bubble a lot. Also, they are very successful in their life at the moment. They worked really hard to get where they are. This person is a workaholic. You may know them through work, whether that’s because you work in the same environment or because you had to be in their working environment at some point in time. Like, think of a patient going to the hospital or a customer doing their shopping. Work is the common thread that sparked this meeting is what I meant. This person takes a lot of time to warm up to people. They’re a bit uptight sometimes but they’re very kind and understanding. They are respected by many. People tend to admire them. You may have interacted with them through social media. This person is also very generous and giving. They could do a lot of community work or acts of service. That may be something they are known for. Like, they could publicly advocate for a humanitarian cause or use their social media platform and influence to help people. This person could have major Taurus and Aquarius placements. But more than that, I get the feeling that they’re just very graceful and they set the example. Like they have a lot of principles and a strong moral code which impresses people. They just are naturally bold and confident but they may not be aware of it. They are very good communicators. They could speak many different languages. They are educated and very smart. This person likes debates, philosophy, history. They have a bit of a competitive side.

One way that you could recognise this person is that they are really blunt. They don’t filter their words which sometimes may get them in trouble. They always say what they think and mean what they say. They put a lot of thought and heart into what they do. They just love to learn and improve. They are extremely dedicated and patient. They definitely have a good income. This person could be physically attractive. I get the message they have the eye for aesthetically pleasing things. And that is reflected in how they dress and appear to others. They may come from a wealthy background for some of you. Or like their wealth has been built from generation to generation. This person may be slow to make a move but they definitely understand everything before anyone else does. They are observant and witty. They can be quite sarcastic at times. I feel like this person tends to be alone a lot. They may not have a lot of friends or have a hard time connecting with people. They look quite intimidating to others. Especially their eyes. They have an intense gaze. They see right through people. They have strong boundaries. This is also someone that may enjoy being in the spotlight even though they may tell you otherwise. They are humble and reserved but they definitely thrive the most when everyone is watching them. This person may have a following on social media. Like, maybe they do it for fun but it actually worked really well and now a lot of people follow them. I feel like this person doesn’t really grasp their full potential and the impact they have on other people.

Oracle | The Magi, The Revolutionary, Shadow, Get Curious, Play & Shungite, Apophyllite, Kyanite

This person is very spiritual, may be religious but most importantly they're into the esoteric. They could practice meditation often, maybe they pull their own tarot cards or practice some form of divination. One thing is sure, their intuition is on point. They always speak from the heart and work hard to stay true to themselves. They have a "if you don't know, don't talk" type of mentality. This person only speaks up to deliver the truth. Other wise, they'll keep quiet. They go deep. They're not afraid to be alone. They may even purposefully seek solitude. They are quite playful and innocent, very kind and open minded people, but they'll make sure you're worth their time and energy before they let you see that side of themselves. This person does not joke around. You either love them or hate them, no in between. They have a bit of a ride or die attitude. This is someone that may have struggled with mental health issues. They are thus very protective of their own space and peace of mind. They spend most of their time educating themselves, trying to become a better person, connecting with the divine. Material matters don't interest them. It may be difficult for them to remain grounded in reality. They are constantly thinking, trying to anticipate and plan their future. They have a very good perception of people and themselves. They're highly conscious of their own limits and shadows. They've done a lot of shadow work and they make it their life goal to purge whatever shadow they have. This person is really intense. I get strong Scorpio vibes from them as well as Aries for some reason. They can definitely be stubborn and opinionated. But this person just wants to be the main character of their own story. They want to be in control of their own fate and that may be because they didn't have the possibility to express themselves before. They are really powerful and influent. I feel like a lot of people would get impacted by their words and mindset, and this person would be like "what? what's going on?". They don't realize how inspiring they can be to others. They're a natural born leader. They just intuitively know what to do and what to say at the right time. They just instantly get it, which may scare people a lot. Their job could involve being in the public eye or talking a lot. Like, making speeches and uplifting people. With that play card I also get that very childlike energy. So maybe they work with children.

Confirmation signs: -> Parted hair, mistletoe, butterflies, crystals, letter S, grey and lilac, birds, bats, dolphins, Russia, India, Scorpio, Aries, divination

Group 3

Tarot | 9 of cups, Hierophant, 7 of swords, High Priestess, 6 of cups, 8 of cups, back of the deck 4 of cups

I get a strong past life / past energy from this group so for some of you this could be an ex lover. I also heard, as I got the two first cards, "a person that you dream of marrying". They are a soulmate of yours. They could be a childhood friend. You could have had a child with this person. As of now, you and they are not together that's for sure. There's a separation energy here. This is someone that you either could not be with or you had to hide your relationship for a time. One of you eventually cut ties with the other. This person is still in love with you. They lie to themselves about that and try to pretend that they are over the break up but even after all this time they still think of you and they miss you. For some of you, this person is now in a committed relationship and they're trying to move on but they still reminisce about the past and wonder what things could have been if they gave your connection another try. I get that they have a lot of regrets. I pick up on another energy of two people loving each other greatly but being unable to make their connection official. That may be for those of you that have a specific person in mind that you wish to marry someday. You and this person are both heartbroken over the fact you can't be together right now. Your attraction for each other is kept hidden. This person is downplaying their feelings for you. They pretend to be your friend. They may have purposefully friendzoned you, thinking it would make things easier but it just made it worse. In reality, this person was thinking about marrying you too but they can't. I'm picking up on religious and cultural differences that scare them. I get the message that they are feeling pressured by their family's expectations. They feel deeply connected to you, both spiritually and emotionally. There's a lot of water energy here. They're deep in their feelings for you. They are wearing a lot of masks around you. Maybe for some of you, they're already engaged. Or they promised to marry someone but then they met you and it completely wrecked them. They've tried to forget about you but they just can't. You're not in contact with them right now but you may intuitively pick up on their energy. Specifically, you may get messages from them through music. Like, you turn on the radio in your car and suddenly you hear a song that maybe you used to listen to together or the lyrics just remind you of them. That's very specific but they may have a little moustache.

Both of you think a lot about each other, no matter your situation. I feel like you may also reminisce about this person a lot. This is someone that you have a lot of affection for. Maybe you've hidden your attraction for this person for a long time because you feared rejection. I feel like deep down you know that you and this person are meant to meet again. But the timing just wasn't right and you've accepted to let them go, even though that was a difficult thing for you to do. Both of you have come a long way but there's still a lot of healing to do in your connection. And this person could potentially be coming back into your life for that exact reason.

Oracle | Connect to heart, The Seeker, Transmute, Movement, The Pillar & Sodalite, Apophyllite, Astrophyllite

Again, I get that friend vibe from this spread. This may be someone you felt very comfortable and safe with. You maybe started out as friends but quickly became lovers. This person is very giving and generous. They wear their heart on their sleeve. They may be the puppy lover type. They are pretty active. They like to use movement as a way to detox and release stress. This is a person that is very grounded and mature. They made you feel safe and they really have that spouse energy. I feel like this is a solid person, with an open heart and an open mind that really matches you in terms of what they expect from life and what their goals are. You may have had a similar perception of love and relationships. Maybe you both wanted kids and a house that you could live in. This person is physically attractive and I feel like when you were in contact with them it may have been very hard for you to keep your hands to yourself lmao Like, they're just so sensual you may have felt really horny around them. And vice versa. This could be someone you had sex with. Again I am picking up on something really specific so that might not be for everyone. Also, this may be triggering to some of you so I want to apologize if this makes you uncomfortable, but I feel like I have to say it. You can skip this part if you wish.

For some of you, if this was someone you met when you were younger like a teenager or something, you may have had unprotected sex with them and got pregnant. But you could have hidden that from them. I'm getting the message that you didn't keep the baby. Or if you did, you never told this person that this was their baby. Again, that is very specific so I don't think it will resonate with everyone. Or maybe just you were really afraid of getting pregnant if you kept seeing this person and you were in a position where you couldn't allow yourself to be in such a situation so you decided to part ways with this person. Maybe you just were too young and thought this wasn't a good idea. I wish to point out that the person we're talking about is a very respectful person. I don't pick up on an abusive or toxic energy. This is someone that really treated you well and was very understanding of your limits. I don't see this person forcing you to do anything, I don't feel like they didn't know what they were doing. This person was very genuine and conscious of their feelings and desires. They truly loved you and envisioned a future with you. And I feel like if you had told this person that you got pregnant, they would have been okay with it and been a responsible person. I get a very soft vibe from this person honestly, they're just such a sweetheart. They may have been a bit immature but this person definitely wasn't egotistical and careless. I feel like they would have loved to be a parent and go through this experience by your side.

Confirmation signs : -> pet dog, snakes, bees, Pisces, Taurus, Scorpio, Virgo, Norway, Quebec, India, Colorado, Rihanna - Shine bright like a diamond, Selena Gomez - Can't keep my hands to myself

[plutoasteroids]

The Love Of Your Life - PAC

PILE 1 PILE 2 PILE 3

PAID READINGS!

My readings are allegedly for entertainment purposes only. Any choices made based on my readings have nothing to do with me and the responsibility falls solely on the shoulders of the person consuming my readings.

Love of my life, you've hurt me You've broken my heart And now you leave me Love of my life, can't you see? - Queen

PILE 1

The love of your life Pile 1 is someone who is quite traditional with how they view marriage and love. The love of your life is the type to not be afraid of courting you with their entire being. They are very big on the family and home; they want stability and a home full of love where everyone is free to express themself and be emotionally fulfilled. When it comes to the relationship with you they want to be both the lover and the protector, they want to take care of you in every aspect like emotionally, physically, mentally and materialistically. They work very heart for what they have but to them it feels like it's not enough infact I don't think it will never feel like it's enough. When it comes to taking care of you NOTHING WILL EVER BE ENOUGH. It kind of bruises their ego when they can't properly provide for you. They are quite a romantic and sensitive soul that just wants a spouse and a happy home.

PILE 2

The love of your life is a more intense person. They have this inner strength and resilience that a lot of people may find intimidating, and some may try to oppress it but it never works because they just kind of bulldoze their way through situations. They have a fiery lust for life, they are the let's take life by the balls and fuck everyone else type of person. They dance to the beat of their own drum, and they don't conform to societal standards which again a lot of people may hate. They are a free spirit and they tend to have a difficulty with balancing their free-spirited nature and responsibility. They seem to be more on the jealous side and more on the overpowering side.

PILE 3

The love of your life is someone who is quite romantic and values connections with those closest to them deeply. They will be your other half with similar morals, mindset and opinions. They are intuitive, creative. In love they take the more feminine role like being loving, caring and nurturing basically being the one to take care of you. They are very outspoken and fiery in nature and has a lot of ambition. They want to achieve a lot at once. They seem to have frustrations relating to work. They want to achieve a lot professionally and when they don't meet their goals they just go into a deep frustration and it feels like they just aren't themselves.

[marsprincess889]

VEDIC ASTRO OBSERVATIONS

Part 3

More random and messy but still true

DISCLAIMER: if you consider some of these positive and others negative, then I want you guys to know that they come from my personal observations of real life. None of the nakshatras are better or worse, or positive or negative, these are just aspects of them, but nevertheless, true.

Magha people can have such an ego omg like I've said that before with rat yonis but P.Phalguni I think is nowhere near Magha in that department. Ashwini can also come off as egotistical, but it's moreso that they're unintentionally(or sometimes, intentionally) ignorant. Mula can also have egotistical tendencies, esp cause the galactic center(the black hole) is in Mula nakshatra, so they can have this "I'm the center of the world" attitude, but in my experience it manifests as just them mainly trusting themselves. All Ketu nakshatras have this theme of going inwards and shutting the world out, but since Magha is in the Sun ruled Leo (sun=ourselves, confidence) it can come off as undeservedely egotistical, different from Ashwinis aggressively(Aries/Mars) ignorant and Mula's relentlessly preachy(Sagittarius/Jupiter).

The Ashlesha to Jyeshta pipeline is actually very obvious, they're more connected than people realize. Obviously they're both Mercury nakshatras, but Ashlesha is often seen in a very sensual, feminine light and Jyeshta in a no-nonsense, cut to the chase light. The difference is that all that bottled up energy of Ashlesha, that was either healing or poisoning the native is ready to fight and be more direct in Jyeshta. They're both laser focused on survival and protecting themselves, desperately trying to realize themselves in the proccess, so it's a struggle. Both are trying to preserve their energy, but Ashlesha was trapped in the confines of the 4th house(family, roots,mother) and the sign of Cancer/Moon(emotions, fliudity, sensitivity), either for its safety or to its detriment, and was trying to get their energy out in a correct way. Jyeshta is out in the open, thrown in the sign of Scorpio/the 8th house/ passive Mars (transformation, rebirth, purging, sex, death, warfare, survival, defence. You and the other are one and the same in the 8th house). For Jyeshta, the only way to survive, is to win over everyone else, and when they eventually win, they gain dominion over others. So Jyeshta is kind of about revisiting that Ashlesha state and having the revenge, so to speak, because after gaining strength on your own, you eventually have to face the ones who you were so desperately trying to get away from(ashlesha).

Mulas can be so gentle and honestly at first I did not know where that came from, but since the last third of nakshatras are about transcending and mastering their ruling planet in a sense(btw, that does not mean that they embody the energy of the planet more, or that they're better) and Ketu is about primal instincts, then Mula is the place where the individual centers themselves in their truth and is unmoved by others, thus, avoiding unnecessary energy drainage. Of course, they can also be the most untamed of all, but in our civilized(mostly🙁) society, their natural demeanor is extremely calm.

Chitra natives are soooooo chaotic like calm down jesus. It makes sense when your consider that its gunas are TTT(tamas, tamas, tamas). Among the planets, Ketu is the most tamasic one(Chitra's ruler_Mars is also tamasic), but each nakshatra has their own guna(Ashwini is Rajas x3, Bharani is Rajas-Rajas-Tamas, Revati is Sattva x3, you get it). So Chitra people are the most chaotic, if I may say so. (Gotta credit The Hidden Octave's Chitra video for the observation). There are a lot of indicators that explain this but I've already written a lot in the previous ones😭 if you know basic vedic, this observation is of no surprise to you. They can also be prone to anxiety, but often they're unaware of it, so that has a detrimental effect on people around them.

Uttara Bhadrapadas are VERY hard to order around. Impossible even. Idk why someone would want to order someone else around but nevertheless, these natives can deal with any kind of unfairness with such grace, self-mastery and quiet strength that eventually nothing gets to them anymore. So if you see an U. Bhadra child disobey their superiors calmly and in a controlled but determined manner, you know why.

I really have a lot of respect for Uttara Ashadas(not all, lmao), because they just deal with stuff alone. And it's natural for them, and they don't do it for a goal(like in Jyeshta, which is not bad, it's just different) or for attention, it's just a way of life for them. Simplicity and stoicism 🤌

Okay, now a fun one: Moon girls (Rohini, Hasta and Shravana) are the blueprints of Y/N. If you guys don't know what Y/N please look it up. Not just Y/N, but characters like Bella Swan(hasta moon, rohini asc actress) and Elena Gilbert(shravana moon anctress) come to mind. Even popular instagram users who parody those movies/fanfics/characters have moon placements(@laframbuesaa_ rohini moon if i remember correctly and @yasmine_sahid_ shravana moon(?) on insta). Even Harry fcking styles, who is probably the most common love interest in those fanfics has hasta moon. If you know a little about nakshatras, this makes sooo much sense. Moon is something that masses can understand and digest easily, so it's not complicated and sometimes, it can verge on delusions(or an insane sensitivity and receptivity and the ability to read between the lines, but that's just for a number of their natives). Other nakshatras that can fall into the Y/N trope are venus and ketu nakshatras, but moon is the most classic example of it.

I want confirmation in the comments/reblogs for this one: Bharani natives love high fantasy, history(esp medieval), fantasy in general and/or just everything/anything with that vibe. Cause I'm bharani moon and I do, and I've seen some other examples. If not, then the Bharani natives themselves seem like they're out of those times/stories. I can't explain it in any other way. (This might be true for Bharani Ketu too.)

Alright, this is all. Reblog, comment, like. Interact please

Take care

[thesirencult]

How Will Your FS See You ?

1--2

*****************************************

Pile 1

I'm seeing a vision. A girl is gathering flowers and playing in the sun between trees. At the same time, a man is looking at her like she is his whole world.

What this tells me is that there is a very clear distinction between you and your future spouse's energies. Your FS is definitely more masculine (no matter their gender) and you are more feminine.

This person sees you as a ray of light. You are dainty like a flower and sweet like honey. I'm hearing the word "yellow" 💛. Whenever they are looking at you, you are draped in golden light.

Now, what makes me sad is that you don't see yourself that way. Your person knows that you are picking yourself apart and they hate it.

You are a shiny little star to them. Some words they might call you are : my little star, pooh bear, sweetheart, honey, sweetie, cutie. They believe you are the sweetest, loveliest, most sincere person on planet earth. You believe that you do not deserve love or that you are not that important but they are seeing "You are important. You are as important as the air I breathe. You are necessary to my survival."

Like the sun is the centre of our universe, you are the centre of their universe. Your FS is very affectionate with you. I'm seeing someone kissing the fingers of someone else and breathing in their scent from their neck/hair. First and foremost they find you sweet and cute. Like, to them, intimacy doesn't mean mindless physical connection but love making. They love your hands and your nose.

They adore your expressions and they find certain quirks you have cute. As an example, when you feel tired and puff air out or if you tag on their hand and look up at them.

This person might be bigger than you and they just want to protect and serve you. I believe that they want to set boundaries between you and the world. They want to hold up a mirror for you and help you see your own light.

Whenever you are sad they want to make you smile.

I believe that you and your FS are going to be really close. This is not a normal bond. To others it might not seem healthy, they way that you are attached to eachother, but for you it's perfect...

Pile 2

Your FS sees you as their dream person, not in a childish way but in a mature way. You are what they need not what they wanted.

This person has had lots of experiences when it comes to love. When they meet you they will be going through a "winter" moment, life will have lost its spark. You might be born in March, cause you are going to wash away the snow and help them see the bright side of life again.

This will not be easy. Your FS will see you as their wish fulfillment, but at moments they will be wondering whether God or the d*vil sent you. You will be triggering their old wounds and stagnant energy.

This person will be very caring towards you. They will constantly remind you to take your vitamins and drink enough water. They will tease you about your height or nose just to get to your nerves.

I'm hearing "They are so draining!". Now, this is really funny cause I heard it in a teasing way, like you are at the next room and they are telling your mom you are a pain in the butt when in reality they love your quirks.

They will be constantly worrying about your well-being lol. They will get mad when you are not taking care of yourself and they will be trying to guilt trip you into doing things that are good for yourself.

Let's say you are really shy and don't want to go to the beach but they want to go and you have a dog that loves the water. They will be telling you "See, the dog is broken hearted. You are not a really good dog mom/dad."

This person will think you are sneaky. They will love the sparkle your eyes have as you have a very "active" inner child.

I believe you don't show that side to others that often and no one will believe what they have witnessed. You could have made a crazy food combination or they found you teaching the dog muay thai, to them you can NEVER be boring. It's like, what is she up to, AGAIN?

I also get that you might give them the "puppy eyes" when you get caught doing something you're not supposed to be doing (ex. cheating on your diet) or playing all coy and sweet and they love that!

[moonreader1010]

Pac- how can you be the b*tch that never loses<3

(the pictures do not belong to me. All rights go to the original owner)

Pile 1. Pile 2.

Pile 3 ^

Pile 1:

Go tell your friends about it (about it)

Go tell 'em what you know, what you seen

How I roll, how I get it on the low (oh)

You have a really bright aura. You should really use it. it will take you to great heights. You have this ability to shed enlightenment over literally anyone. That's your superpower. Your connections are very important. You should work on your tolerance. Try to not get so involved in matters that don't concern you. Be helpful but to an extent. I see you giving A LOT to other people. But please look after yourself first. You are sensitive to certain things. Use this ability. Don't let it use you. Okay?. You need to learn how to balance your pride and when to compromise. I see you leaning toward one side more but bby different situations need to be dealt with differently. Yes balance. Another card is also pointing towards balance. Learn balancing things and you will be unstoppable.

There has been some loss. There is some anger too. And bby it is only contributing towards emotional instability. Don't let it control you. You are made for greater things. You might have felt left out a lot in your life but that's because people don't know what to do with you and your amazing self. You are different. And that's such a good thing no? Why don't you let yourself accept it. You won't fit in and that's because you simply are just better than them. Use it!!!!!!

Your brain is AMAZING. Your Ideas are amazing. You can play with emotions!!!!!! Girlllll!!! You really need to go out there and get it. Period.

Additional- Libra, high achiever, materialistic, 3, 1, affinity, triumph.

Song for you - tell your friends by the Weeknd

Pile 2: a bit 18+

You gotta be a star to jump over the moon so when you touch on me

You're a shooting star (a star), oh yeah (a star)

You know you got somethin' for the world to see and there I go

Still wondering who you are (a star, a star, yeah)

Your friendships are very important. Your communication has so much potential to make you a winner. Why don't you use it? You might love solitude and your own company but bby you gotta get out to play. And to win. Sympathy seems to be something that you know how to use. You have it in you. Again, friendship and community has been highlighted. There is a gift that you have inherited from your ancestors. You also seem to have a power in creating suspense and mystery and it's really attractive. You should use it more. Oohhh I see that you are quite feisty. You are not someone who just simply agrees to anything. You oppose it. You make things interesting. Yum. Are you possessive? Because people really admire it in you. In a sexy way. There is this arrogance that even though is conventionally bad but your arrogance is different. It makes things interesting almost. You give people ecstasy. This euphoric feeling. Very feminine energy from this pile.

Additional - cat, business, money.

Song for you - star by Megan thee stallion (feat. Lucky Daye)

Pile 3-

You came along when I needed a savior

Someone to pull me through somehow

I've been torn apart so many times

I've been hurt so many times before

So I'm counting on you now

Somebody already broke my heart

Straight up I'll tell you that i got very slippery energy. Very teasing. I also had this sudden moment where I got really angry. I feel like this pile is very "good girl gone bad" types. Past wounds. You have been hurt. A LOT. There was an earlier version of you that has been killed. You are an entirely new person. I'm getting very "don't touch or I'll break your hand" energy. Ummm. Baddie. Haha. Anyway, there has been a lot of stress, overworking or like some overwhelming experience. Too much to handle. Or maybe that's what people made you feel, that you are too much to handle or very high maintenance. But what do they know. They didn't deserve you (i suddenly felt like I had to tell you this). So true. They definitely don't deserve you. Maternal trauma. I'm so sorry bby. Heavy theme of transformation. Keep your good fait up bby. Do something for your soul and watch how you win. You have been oppressed a lot and it's time to break free. Don't hide. Despite all this, there is an innocence to you and it drives people crazy. Girlllllll. I got goosebumps. Please invest in yourself. Omg are you seriously okay bby? I'm so sorry. But it's over now. Get up and make sure nobody ever thinks about hurting you ever again. Don't suppress your memories bby. Feel them and let them transform you. Girl you are going to win.

Additional - heart, tears, fox, red, 8th house, scorpio.

Song for you - somebody already broke my heart by sade (this song is like a dedication from you to yourself)

[cutiepieloves131]

Rohini & Ashlesha ruling over, "The Siren Archetype"

Siren means a seductively beautiful or irresistible woman, especially one who beguiles men with a alluring voice but is also very dangerous.

I observed for the past few months of female celebrities who are considered to be "Sirens" and the two nakshatras that arose the highest in a lot of these women big 3, big 6, atmakaraka, lagnesh, or ascendant lord were Rohini and Ashlesha! In my opinion it 100% makes sense because Rohini and Ashlesha are known to be the most seductive nakshatras.

Rohini is naturally a seductive and alluring nakshatra, they have a huge amount of magnetism and irresistibility. Many perceive them to be docile and innocent which is a little true but at the same time Rohini individuals have a beguiling dark side and it's shown through fashion, makeup, and mannerisms. Their hypnotic snake-like eyes and allure will lure you in like a moth to a flame.

Ashlesha possess an tantalizing and enticing quality that's hard resist with a lot of people deeming them as incredibly sexy beauties. Their aura and the way they talk is very tempting almost attracting everyone towards them in just one minute. They already are rule the dark feminine aesthetic and the Siren eyed look, the gaze is hypnotizing and captivating. Ashlesha women are extremely powerful seductress.

Another thing that Rohini and Ashlesha have in common is the power attraction able to pull masses with ease due to their enthralling and entrancing talents and they're both connected to snakes which grants them seduction and hypnotism, but also snakes has connections to water too some snakes know how to swim and those that are born with snake yoni nakshatras can be excellent swimmers and sensual dancers. Snake nakshatras make great singers, they have breathy, sultry, and trance-inducing vocals. Both of these nakshatras tend to attract people that want to abuse, and take advantage of them because of their beauty, charm, and seductiveness. It's similar to a snake it'll be minding its own business just passing through and then all of a sudden humans or animals will catch hold of the its presence admiring it or immediately freaking out wanting to attack it, this is why snakes are constantly on defense mode from things and people that'll want to harm them much similar to Siren and her singing. Thanks to the venom that snakes maintain that is too used to protect themselves as well.

Marilyn Monroe 🖤 Rohini Sun & Mercury, Ashlesha Ascendant

Marilyn was known to be one of the most popular and beloved sex symbol in her prime and still is after her death. She's also referred to being the most iconic Siren, Marilyn had a magnetic charisma about her that many viewers, and fans, loved about her. She was enormously irresistible to masses with her beautiful appearance, blonde hair, red lips, and hourglass figure was a big part of her allure. Why do you think those who use the 'Marilyn Monroe Effect' to exude confidence, sensuality, and timeless beauty that she personified. Marilyn Monroe was a force to be wrecked with and still is!

Salma Hayek 🖤 Ashlesha Venus Atmakaraka

The seductive Salma Hayek, forever an enchantress has remained a beacon of raw sensuality and untamed beauty for many decades, with her dark eyes, thick raven tresses, and hourglass figure. Her spellbinding allure is undoubtedly unmatched, in 1996's Dusk Till Dawn most iconic scene Salma gained massive attention worldwide for her exotic and complling snake dance in the movie, you'll think she was a siren out of water performing that dance.

Angelina Jolie 🖤 Rohini Sun

Halting as the world's most beautiful woman to ever hit this world is also a famous Siren which you can see through her movies, interviews, and photos. Angelina has this siren-like and hypnotic gaze able to captivate those that look into her eyes, her entire existence is the reason why she subconsciously causes extreme reactions within the public. Angelina has a erotic and tempting quality to her that's a big factor to her appeal, beauty, and aura she's everybody's girl crush of the century. Angelina Jolie will forever be that girl!

Alexa Demie 🖤 Ashlesha Jupiter & Ascendant

Alexa known to play Maddy Perez in Euphoria, because of her role in Euphoria she gained a mass following on social media. Alexa is also a private person barely revealing things about herself and personal life which led to people being intrigued by her, she has a enigmatic and mystifying trait about her that no one can explain not even me. Alexa doesn't have to try anything to grab anyone's attention her ravishing beauty and the way she carries herself quickly captures onlookers eyes, to me Alexa Demie embodies the true traits of a Siren.

Adriana Lima 🖤 Ascendant Lord Mars in Rohini

Adriana is one of the most famous and successful models to ever walk multiple runways, in 2012 she's even been viewed by more than 100 million people from her appearing in two Super Bowl ads in one game! Ever since then Adriana still remained one of the most popular Victoria's Secret models, in 2012 Adriana is ranked 4th on the list of top-earning models with an estimated annual salary of $7.3 million and in 2021 she ranked 2nd with an estimated salary of $30 million. Adriana is noted for her magnetic presence and remaining agelessly alluring, she's effortlessly oozing charm and confidence through her walks, becoming a known figure of beauty and in the modeling world.

Ailyn 🖤 Rohini Sun & Mercury, Possible Ashlesha Moon

Before I finish up this post I'd like to add Ailyn here, she was a former singer in the Norwegian metal band called, "Sirenia" and when she was still in the group they had a album named, "Perils of the Deep Blue" that came out in 2013 with the cover image of Siren. All of the songs in the album is dedicated to Siren, Ailyn's singing and essence alone is reminding me of a Siren.

More Siren Examples

Brigitte Bardot [Rohini Moon and Ashlesha Mars], Bella Hadid [Ashlesha Mars Atmakaraka], Michelle Pfeiffer [Rohini Ascendant], Halle Berry [Ashlesha Sun], Emily Ratajkowski [Rohini Sun], Mila Kunis [Ashlesha Sun], Madison Beer [Rohini Ascendant], Monica Bellucci [Ashlesha Venus], Hwasa [Rohini Moon], Mae West [Ashlesha Mercury], Gabbriette Betchel [Rohini Moon], Elizabeth Taylor [Ashlesha Jupiter], Uma Thurman [Rohini Mars], Jennifer Lawrence [Ashlesha Sun], Olivia Wilde [Rohini Moon], Charlize Theron [Ashlesha Sun, Moon, & Mercury]

[dingodad]

please god i need to know what U think of the whole “jadebloods are all female!” thing because i got into homestuck in 2019 around the time of friendsim and (retching) Lanque so i always assumed they were explicitly intended to be an all-female caste. however, re-reading the comic this year, i couldnt find a mention of it other than virgo and the Space aspect being really feminine, but i think kanayas journey with motherhood is more kanaya-centric than All-Jadebloods centric??

on one hand, it makes sense given that alternia has very real gendered oppression, so what’s better for that than CATHOLICISM?? on the other hand, i always saw kanaya as being transfem coded, because it connects so well with roxy yknow.. homestuck fans love to insist that certain characters just have to be cis women (kanaya, jade, roxy)

(as an aside; was “long hair was butch on alternia” a one off joke? i like speculation about alternia’s fashion opposing earth, lol)

most all of our basis for explicitly gendered interpretation of Alternia comes from act 6 intermission 3, where Aranea tells us that "jade 8loods were also an almost exclusively female caste". so the door has always been open for there to be "some male jadebloods". but it's a mistake to view this as having anything to do with any kind of "biological sex". the whole idea of biological sex among trolls is a smoke screen. the jadebloods' assigned gender at birth is "jadeblood". this is what makes them a feminised caste.

Caliborn doesn't have a clue what biological sex is. Aranea will tell you that there are boy cherubs and girl cherubs, but for your own sanity you need to cast this idea out of your mind: cherub sex takes place between good and evil cherubs - which is determined by their blood - and anything else is just roleplay. Caliborn's attitude toward sexing is that the ones he likes are boys - that's all the thought that goes into it. and that's the mindset we need to be aware of when we delve into understanding troll gender. there are some trolls who have breast tissue and some who don't, but they aren't "mammaries" in any sense, so there's no reason to believe they're actually sexual characteristics of any kind; maybe this is what Lord English chose to base his gender schema on, but the idea that this means there must be "male trolls" and "female trolls" is completely imagined for the narrative convenience of the human reader.

when we read that there are "male-dominated" highblood castes and therefore by implication female-populated lowblood castes, it's not by some coincidence of biology: the highblood castes are male-dominated BECAUSE they are highblood castes. each caste has a role to play in Caliborn's Alternia, and just as the highblooded roles are those of patriarchal domination, the lower castes must take on roles of feminised submission; and in the case of the jades in particular, this means breeding duties. the fact that this also comes with the expectation to wear makeup and pretty clothes is just more roleplay.

so tl;dr what i think of "the all jadebloods are female thing" is that it is very obviously true but in a way more 5 dimensional gender studies way than anyone else tends to mean when they say it

my pet "long hair was butch on alternia" headcanon - which is a joke but in the way all headcanons about alternia should be jokes of some kind - actually kind of relates to this lol. bc i figure that if gendered expectations of female trolls includes working in disgusting underground caverns filled with genetic material, it's going to be practical to keep your hair close to your head where it won't get dirty, in much the same way the feminist image of the short-haired woman became popular in the west during and after world war 2, wherein a lot of women had to start wearing their hair close to their heads to avoid scalping themselves in the factory machinery they suddenly had to start working with. hence kanaya dedicated to her assigned feminine role and wearing her hair short vs. porrim rebelling against it for feminist reasons and thus wearing her hair at a length that would be totally impractical for wading through gene pools.