#i care too much about myself and my own life than to be a peace of meat risking my life out here

[dogearedheart]

8i've been thinking about the last asks i got today. and i think it's better for me to take a step back from this account. i know the anon didn't mean anything by it, but i still feel like i am being a negative presence on here and weirding people out with who i am is nothing i want. so, i am not deleting or anything. i am just gonna be less present with sharing personal things or leaving tags. I'll probably be more active on my second account where i don't have that many followers :)

[larrysblooming]

as an american living in a southern state and working in a public workplace, i am so fucking scared

[zyafics]

i love love love your writing<3

rq: rafe had came up to tanneyhill's balcony for some peace at his own party. though he didn’t expect reader to be there, looking utterly lost. he knows reader is new. seen you before, too, hanging out with sarah’s crowd; under a pogue’s arm whenever they see him around, telling you rafe isn't anything worth talking, or interacting with.

first off, i am so sorry it took me so long to get this done (as with a lot of my requests) but thank you so much for enjoying my writing!! 🩷 i hope i do this prompt justice (literally shaking in my boots as i post this 😭)

ANGRY GOD | Rafe Cameron

MASTERLIST (oneshot/mini series) | x Female Reader

Content — fluff, angst, Rafe spiraling (S2 Canons), Enemies Tension, Rafe growing possessive of Reader. Word Count — 3.2K.

Dedication — to @mintforadollar who listened to me rant about this plot a month ago, only for it to now be completed <3. Prompt credited to this on c.ai!

lıllılı Champagne Coast by Blood Orange

Rafe wants to be alone.

His mind is caught in a tailspin, muscles singing with ache from his latest altercation. It didn't help that the fucker managed to get some good swings in, ripples of pain spread from his jawline to his left eye. When he enters the second floor of Tannyhill, all he wants is to catch a breath of fresh air away from the party. His party.

He didn't expect to see you.

"Out." Rafe commands gruffly. You flinch at his abrupt command. "Second floor is off-limits."

He adds nothing else as he marches over to the edge of the balcony, digging his scraped palms into the smooth ridges of the handrails. He didn't want anyone here to witness the brunt of his frustration and disappointment, or how his mind swims with disoriented and incoherent thoughts. He wants to be alone.

But you won't let him.

Cautiously, you take a step forward—not in the direction of the exit, as he hoped—but towards Rafe instead. Lifting his head at the sound of your faint footsteps, agitation flushing through his expression at your proximity. "Didn't I tell you to get out?"

"You got into a fight." You mumble your observation, examining his hardened profile to discover the bruise that decorates his jawline, swelling with discoloration, the darkening under his left eye, and the split of open skin right above his brow.

He scoffs. "No shit."

"And you're bleeding."

He is? He didn't know that. All consumed by the adrenaline rushing through his system—that has yet to wind down—Rafe lifts his hand to run his fingers over the most prominent aches around his face. When he presses against something wet, he withdraws, finding a fresh coat of blood over his fingertips.

Rafe grimaces at the sight—not the blood, he's used to that—but the fact that his opponent succeeded in cutting him too.

Now, he definitely doesn't want you here. Before Rafe has the chance to kick you out the third time, you offer assistance. "I can help," you say meekly, messing with the hems of your top.

He didn't catch it over the loud thumping of his heartbeat in his ears. "What?"

"I can help," you repeat, louder this time, wincing at the projection of your own voice. You don't like the strain in your tone, the desperation seeping through. You'd do anything to avoid returning to the party. "I know how to patch up wounds. I'm training to be an EMT."

"I didn't ask for a life story." He snaps, a mechanical response to any aid. The idea of someone taking care of him is unheard of; unfamiliar and uncomfortable. He doesn't know how to react other than complete and utter rejection. "Besides, I can take care of myself."

Rafe assumes his harsh words would drive you away. The bite behind each syllable has been enough to scare off everyone else but you remain firm in your position. If anything, your expression softens, eyes washing over his rigid posture with a sympathetic look. He hates it.

"I know," you start slowly, eyes cascading down his face, carefully monitoring his reaction. "But... wouldn't it be nice if you didn't have to?"

His expression breaks.

Your kindness strikes directly to his chest and his heart clutches at the way you address him. With humanity. Even when he's been nothing but a complete asshole to you, demanding your departure, you respond with a sense of warmth. Rafe clenches down his jaw.

When he doesn't answer quickly enough, a sign of his contemplation, you add. "Please."

Reluctantly, Rafe gives in. "Fine."

Rafe moves from the balcony deck to reenter Tannyhill, not bothering to check if you're following behind. He heads straight to the ensuite connected to his bedroom, checking under the sink for his first aid kit, before throwing the box over the counter.

That's when he catches a glimpse of himself through the mirror, the ugly bruising that lines his face, the dried blood that stains his temple. His jaw tightens at the sight.

You enter shortly after, seeing him with his back to the mirror, his spine pressed against the rim of the porcelain sink. Your eyes do a quick sweep of your surroundings, before landing on Rafe and his rigid form, arms crossed over his chest, and a cold look on his face. He just wants to get this over with.

You glance outside, to his room, with its openness, before meeting his gaze. "Can we go to your bed?"

His answer is immediate. "No."

You frown but ask nothing more. Rafe's trying to make this difficult for you, refusing to cooperate because it's easier than submitting to your grace. Easier than admitting he'd like the help. You work around that.

Grabbing the antiseptics from the kit, you proceed to clean his wounds, softly massaging his flesh in the process. For a moment, it feels too good and Rafe fights the urge to lean into your hand before a sharp pain rips through him from the open cut and he hisses.

You immediately pull back, mumbling a quick apology.

His eyes squeeze shut, it takes a moment for the throb to cool down, and once it does, Rafe reconnects his gaze with yours to find the remorseful look behind your stare, the softening of your features met with utmost concern. You don't make another move to try again.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine." He bites out, wanting to rid you of that look. He's not weak. Stop looking at him as if he is. Despite the reassurance, you have yet to continue. "You're not going to be a good doctor if you shy away every time your patient gets hurt."

"I feel bad." You admit, chewing on your bottom lip.

"Why? You didn't do this."

He's the one who got into the fight. The one who swung first. While he may have won in the end, having knocked out the guy in the middle of the yard, it doesn't neglect the damage done to him in the process. But, at the end of the day, it's his fault.

You don't see it that way. "Because you're hurting."

You're too soft. That's what Rafe determines. Every little moment, little sprouts of empathy, every inch of sensitivity, is going to hurt you in the end. It won't save anything.

"I don't need your pity," Rafe snaps, giving you the first taste of reality under his razor-sharp tongue. He could be considerate, and understanding, but he isn't. That's how he learned.

"It's not—" You sigh. You don't want to argue and relent against his jabs. Without further commentary, you continue forward with your duties: aiding in his treatment and biting through the humane urge to sympathize with his pain.

Rafe takes the silence to observe you while you work. He knows you grew quiet because of his rough manners, and he won't lie to himself and say he enjoys it. He doesn't. But it adds to the list of everything else he has done wrong in his life; his long string of failures that his father can't wait to remind him of.

In the quietness, Rafe recognizes something about you. It takes a moment, after all the aches and throbs, but the recognition dawns on him that you're new. You hang out with his sister, Sarah, and the rest of the filthy group of no-good Pogues on the other side of the island. There have even been occasions when he saw you under JJ's arm, slinging around red solo cups and a grim soak of southside.

"Where's your friends?" Rafe asks, surprising you with the roughness behind his voice.

You lift your gaze to his. "Hmm?"

"The Pogues. Don't you hang out with them?"

You swallow hard, feeling like a child being caught with their hand in the cookie jar. You hoped your newcomer status would be enough to shield yourself from Rafe's wraith, especially his hatred towards your selected group. "Why?"

Rafe immediately picks up on the shift in your demeanor, the rigidness in your shoulders that tells him exactly what he needs to know. "You've heard about me, haven't you?"

You hesitate to answer. Rafe presses on. "What'd they say?"

Your friends have told you many warnings about the notorious Rafe Cameron. It all comes down to one conclusion: he's dangerous. He's irrational, self-centered, and narcissistic. He isn't worth talking to because all he cares about is himself.

However, you like to find out for yourself.

Rafe leans forward, lowering himself to meet your height and his face is right in front of yours. An arrogant smirk rises to his lips, a challenge for you to answer. "Come on, princess, don't tell you came up here without doing a bit of research beforehand."

You recognize this as a facade, a way for him to hide his true feelings because it's easier to disturb others. To mess with people and not reflect on your own. You place a hand against the solid of his chest and gently push him back, forcing him to reinstate the safe distance established before. You continue back to your line of work.

Your little push surprises Rafe. It also intrigues him too.

"They said you weren't worth talking to," you say softly, avoiding eye contact as he follows your every move. "That you're dangerous."

He scoffs at the reveal, but it pinches his heart that his own sister would agree. He values her opinion more than he'd like to admit. Drawing out a noncommital shrug, pretending not to care, he declares. "They're right."

You hum. "Maybe."

He looks directly at you with a raised brow. "Maybe?"

Your eyes finally connect with his, "I'm still figuring that out." You pull back, setting the supplies back into his aid box. "Done."

You're about to take a step back when Rafe grabs your wrist, holding you in place. Your breath shortens, and you peer down at the place of your contact before raising your gaze to his.

"What do you mean by that?" He demands, his expression hardens but his eyes are pleading. That juxtaposition, between who he is and what he wants, is the exact thing you're trying to uncover.

You aren't afraid of him. Not like the others.

"I don't know," you answer truthfully, sweeping over his face, reading the conflict his features can't seem to contain. Rafe, you're slowly unraveling, is someone who puts his heart on his sleeves. He just hasn't had anyone who cares enough to look for it. "I just don't know if I truly believe that."

"Why not? The rest of the island does."

It's almost a spiral. An edge closer to it. You think it's because Rafe finally has someone who looks past his mask, his deception that the rest of the island gladly takes. They're afraid of him; he engineered that reputation by hand. But you've met your fair share of burnt souls to know they're all worth saving.

You answer him.

"Your eyes." You explain gently. "They say it's the windows to someone's soul."

"And?"

"And, Rafe Cameron, you're someone who isn't as heartless as you'd like the rest of the world to believe."

His grip loosens from your words and you take the opportunity to slip out of his grasp and settle your arms by your side. Rafe watches as you offer him a soft smile, one that reaches your eyes, and you're about to return to the balcony deck for some peace when he follows you into his bedroom.

"That's not fair." He denounces, halting your exit.

You turn around to face him. "What is?"

"You can't come in here and make those assumptions. You don't know shit about my life."

Rafe doesn't like to be read so clearly; to know that whatever he's trying to front isn't deluding you. For some reason, he needs to convince you that every rumor and gossip is true. That he is bad. The idea of it is embedded so deeply into the crevices of his self-worth, that he's having a hard time believing anything else.

Rafe expects your reaction to meet his fury, but the slope of your brows furrow together calmly. A delicate practice over years of training. "I never said I did."

"You're acting like you do."

You frown. "Now you're making assumptions about me," you refute, pointing out his hypocrisy, and a tinge of sharpness slips through. "You asked and I answered. You can't be mad because you don't like them."

"Then why?" He snaps, irritation spewing with his venom. "Who the fuck are you to make that judgment?"

"I thought you didn't want to hear my life story."

He huffs. Rafe finds himself at a crossroads. While you're standing there, with your collected composure, he feels like he's unraveling by the seams. There's something about you. The way you read through him like glass. He doesn't know if he likes it or not. If he needs it or not.

"Bitch," he mutters under his breath at your lack of compliance, and your breath hitches at the term, a flash of anger goes through you like a surge. He recognized that look; it was something he was all too familiar with.

You turn around, about to sprint for the exit once again when Rafe calls out. "Wait."

You don't want to turn around this time. Rafe had managed to make you break through your own facade, your own composure that you spent years trying to cultivate. Something about being in the same room as the eldest Cameron makes you regress into your formative years.

"Turn around."

Your jaw is slighted, but you try to hold it together. You loosen your features before you turn on your heel. You still don't think Rafe is the person he's trying to present to the world, and you doubt that he truly carries that much cruelty in one body, but that doesn't mean you have to be in the same room as him.

But something made you stay.

Rafe crosses the large space, standing just in front of you. His breath is hot against yours, his eyes sharp. You tilt your head, meeting his stare, but to contrast his intensity, your gaze is soft yet firm, your eyes unwavering. Just because you are kinder than he is doesn't mean you are weak.

"You know what it's like, don't you?" He murmurs gruffly, his voice straining at the exposure. This questioning also carries the weight of admission underneath; to bridge a kinship. "Or are you a liar?"

You're not. But no one's ever asked the questions Rafe is asking either. Not your friends back home or the new ones with the Pogues. They treasure your friendship but they don't understand your depth.

"No."

"No, what?"

"I'm not a liar," you bite out. Rafe's mouth curls into a satisfactory smile, and he gets a glimpse of your real character. The true you underneath all that dignity. It's like his own dirty secret. "I know."

You saw through Rafe because you understood him. You shared the same sentiments. You groomed the same callousness. Every act he performs, you went through first. You can't point at his reflection without looking at the mirror yourself.

But you're a bit different. You learn to control it. You discovered that all that anger was something else. Hurt, pain, injustice. You take it all and put it in a box, caged behind thick chains and hard locks. Never to be touched again. Rafe takes it out to the open, free to play. You may come from the same origin but you take two different routes.

However, Rafe sees you much clearer now. To know you can understand him, see through his perspective, and filter out his incoherent thoughts. That's something he'd never experienced before in his life.

"The voices, anger, and impulses?" His voice shrinks, eyes searching yours. You hesitate before nodding once. "You get that too?"

It comes out when you're most hurt. "I do."

He feels like can breathe for once, to not feel completely isolated from the rest of the world. Rafe always feels off, like something is wrong with him. Nothing can be explained; nothing is allowed to be explored. Even when he sought therapy, his father denied his request. He thought he‘d be forever alone in all this.

He steps forward, closing in the distance until there's only an inch of space separating you. But even that feels too big. Oxygen stuck in your throat, Rafe connects his gaze with yours to whisper. "You're like me, aren't you?"

You swallow hard. You didn't realize understanding someone could be a reflection of your own damning soul. You don't know if it's a good thing. "Yes."

His pupils are dilated and nearly pitch-black. His breathing shortens, and his gaze pools with desire. You feel it too. Your heart accelerates beneath your ribcage, your stomach knotting with want. When Rafe leans forward, about to capture your lips on his, you ready yourself to let it all in.

But you're a bit different.

You turn your head away at the last second, his contact coming to your cheek.

"I'm..." You exhale, squeezing your eyes shut. "I'm with JJ."

The world stills on its axis, and you feel the gravity of it beneath your feet. You slowly peel your eyes open, only to find Rafe having pulled back, his hand, midway through the air to hold your chin, closes into a tight fist.

You let out a shaky breath, your eyes swimming with regret.

The look on his face is heartbreaking because you know him in parallel, you know what he's feeling. You take a step back, for your sanity or his, it’s unclear. All you know is the distance was safe. Until it wasn't.

"I should go." You whisper.

Rafe says nothing as you pad your way across his room, slipping out of the door. He remains motionless in the same spot, his jaw set, his fists clenched by his side. The adrenaline pulses return through his veins.

Fuck.

It takes a minute to gather himself. Hearing nothing but the throbbing bass beneath him, pulsing through the floor. His heart is wretched, his stomach full of nausea.

Rafe returns to the balcony to pull away from his room, the place where you had been, and he steps closer to the ledge. Everything in his mind is too quiet; sterile and white-screeching. He doesn't know how to fathom this change.

His blue eyes search across the lawn and he easily picks you out of the crowd. He knows you well now. Those brief, fleeting moments attached to his soul are permanent memories.

You rejoined the party with Sarah and the rest of the Pogues, while JJ saunters over and throws his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close and whispering something in your ear. You smile and laugh, but it doesn't quite reach your eyes.

When you look up, you find Rafe already watching. His eyes are set on yours, unmoving, and the intimacy of his gaze strikes something deep. You had to turn away to preserve yourself.

Rafe slowly comes to his understanding on his own. He never had someone who understood him, much less in such a short time. You unravel him behind gentle stares and quiet observations. You knew him because you knew yourself, and he doesn't want to lose that. He doesn't want to lose you. He can’t. 

So, he decided.

You weren't his.

But he's taking you anyways.

IMPORTANT: if you want to follow my fics and updates, follow @zyafics-library and turn on notifications!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

First, let me apologise for making people worry. I appreciate all those who reached out and I'm sorry that I couldn't get back to you all.

I have been through a very rough spiral. It was building for months, and I am still not fully okay.

For those who want context, it's under the cut.

I bought a house in May. It's expensive. I wasn't ready financially or in many ways for that step, but my partner convinced me. I told him as much but I was not heard. Alas, I have a mortgage, full time work, astudent loan, and an ongoing school program to contend with. It hasn't been easy and it caught up to me.

At the same time, a person who traumatised me and I have no way of fully extricating from my life, has moved closer. To keep the peace, I have to associate with him to a degree and he pretends that nothing ever happened. To him, it was nothing.

In June, I moved. It was hard and fast paced. I did most of the paperwork etc for the whole process and obv helped with the physical transition as well. I was responsible for deadlines and checklists for not just myself but my partner.

I was plugging holes in a sinking boat.

At the same time, I had obligations to my family. Every weekend if I wasn't dealing with the house and all that goes into it, I was running around to babysit or see family or whathave you.

In July, I pinched a nerve behind my tailbone. I missed a week of work bc my injury but it took longer for my to recover. I am still feeling it today. It was more than physical, but emotional.

I also got three periods that month. Hormonal can't begin to explain how fucked up I've been.

On top of all that, there are underlying issues associated with other trauma and discontent. I'm realising that I have been loyal and tolerant to the point of my own detriment.

I don't want to hurt people how I've been hurt, so I don't speak up. When people tell me something about myself, I let all the doubts planted in my mind from years of abuse convince me that they're right. I can admit my faults but often times I will think that proof of one flaw means everything about me is rotten.

People forget about me or just don't care. Both or either. They don't put the same effort in that I do. I find it hard to connect because years of disregard and neglect have told me that the other side just won't care.

But I'm not just hurt, I'm angry. I'm seeking therapy and trying to figure this out.

It all boiled over after my last post. Nothing I do is enough. For anyone. Not even when it's a hobby. I was frustrated bc the place I use for escape just made me feel like less than.

Obviously, I don't mean everyone or even the majority. I appreciate the discourse and fun and everything here! There are so many awesome people to interact with and I have missed you all, however, my headspace was bad. Very bad. I had thoughts I haven't dealt with in years.

I put my nose down and just went to work. I didn't wanna talk to anyone. I didn't wanna be in the world.

I did some reading, eventually some non-fandom writing, and sometimes, I just stayed alive.

I don't know if I'm really okay but I'm trying.

To those who have been so patient and supportive, you deserve everything. To those who are silent supporters, you do too. And even to those people who send me the most vile hate, you deserve to lift yourself out of the dark space you're stuck in. Hopefully, I can, too.

[chilschuck]

AAAA i love your blog!! could i pls request a post-canon scenario where chilchuck finally admits his feelings for reader now that they’re not co-workers anymore >_< (assuming reader joined the laios party during the story)

`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ WAAAAH ANON i’m so happy you love my stuff!! i LOVEDDD writing this for you, and i have another request in my askbox that’s similar that i’m going to do as well! this was super fun, and i found myself enjoying this idea and coming up with things i could do with it!!! i hope you enjoy!!! <333

— SHELTER: chilchuck x gn!reader.

꒰ warnings: ꒱ none, sfw fluff!! takes place post-canon.

꒰ wc: ꒱ 1745 (got carried away again…)

✦ i’m scared to reread this, but right now I’m actually happy with it!! i hope you are too!! <333 i tried my best to keep spoilers to a minimum, and to make this fun to read!! also, the title comes from the song shelter by ray lamontagne, which i listened to while writing it. i hope you enjoy!!!

With your party’s adventure finally over, you had decided to try and finally settle down as much as you could. With everyone finding their own new place in life, you did your best to find one too.

You couldn’t deny it had been rather lonely lately. Your own home was empty, a small place you had tried your best to make feel cozy. With your old party members living their own lives, you hoped you could live yours. But evidently, no matter how hard you tried, your mind always went back to him.

It was a bittersweet feeling; imagining him finally living healthily, working on helping others, and even maybe starting up that shop he talked about wanting. It wasn’t like you never saw him, but going on with every day life without him felt… mundane.

Chilchuck was working on himself, reconnecting with his family, and building the future he had hoped for. That alone helped you feel as much at peace as possible. Your feelings, to you, were not nearly as important as his own happiness. So here you waited, counting down the days you’d get to see him again. Maybe he’d be happy to see you too.

Little did you know, Chilchuck was devastatingly nervous. Buttoning up his shirt with shaky fingers, he tried his best to look as decent as he possibly could. It was the final thing he felt he needed to move on, and he wasn’t going to let himself ruin it. Not this, he told himself. There were some things he refused to let slip through his fingers, and one of them were his feelings he had developed for you.

Through it all, you had been by his side. An integral part of the party, you had built him up when he needed it most. Looking past all the mistakes, all the cynicism he liked to cloud himself with, you proved how much you simply cared. Not only for him, but for everyone. Chilchuck had fallen in love with you, and for once, he didn’t want to push those feelings down.

He had bought the flowers he knew you liked, tied with a sweet ribbon that he felt maybe was a bit too much. In fact, maybe all of this was a bit too much, but he hoped it’d work. Chilchuck even went to talk to Marcille about it all, a sign in his own mind that he was more smitten than he had been in years. Not to mention that he had, in fact, reconnected with his ex-wife, and had gained the closure he needed to take this big of a step. There was nothing holding him back now, and he could only hope the words of encouragement he was given would hold true.

Chilchuck had visited your home before, always noting just how comfortable he felt there. You were always happy to have guests lately, and he felt himself praying that this would be the case this time, too. Fist raised in front of your door, he took a deep breath before rapping it against the wood.

The knock came as a surprise, but not as surprising as the person who was behind it. Your eyes widened, his name leaving your lips in delight. “Chilchuck, hello!” It was slightly out of breath from the sheer excitement you had to try and suppress at seeing him here in front of you. Moving to the side, you motioned him in. “Do you… Want to come in?”

One hand behind his back still, trying his best to not snap the stems of the delicate flowers between his fingers, he nodded. “Yeah, sorry for the sudden visit.”

Shaking your head, you walked inside to prepare him something to drink. “Not at all! You know me… I could never say no to seeing you.”

It felt like another of Cupid’s arrows shot him through the chest. Maybe he shouldn’t look too deeply into your words, at least not yet. Following you inside, Chilchuck found himself trying his best to find anything to look at of interest. The plants on your shelves, the well loved books on the table, the occasional trinket you had decided you couldn’t live without… Everything that made it feel so much like you.

While you fiddled around in your small kitchen, Chilchuck cleared his throat. His mouth felt dry, and to try and slow down the thoughts rushing through his head, he spoke up again. “You know… You’ve done a great job with this place. I remember when you bought it.”

You couldn’t help but smile, thinking back fondly of how proud you were. Preparing you both glasses of wine, you turned your attention to him for a moment. “That means a lot, thank you. How have things been with the guild?”

Chilchuck hummed, eyes studying a particular painting on your wall. “Good… Pretty much the usual. Things are going pretty well. What about you, anything interesting since we last saw each other?”

Other than your constant war on your feelings for the half-foot, you’ve been trying new hobbies in order to distract yourself. As you turned to hand him the glass, you racked your brain for something to say. Giving him a sheepish smile, you shook your head. “Not particularly. Here, it’s one you like. Let’s go sit, yeah?”

He held your gaze for a moment, the flowers in his hand a constant reminder of what he was here for. Swallowing hard, he opened his mouth to speak. “Yeah. But first, I have something to give you…”

Finally taking the hand from behind his back, he steeled himself as much as he could before holding them out to you. Quickly setting the glasses down, you let out a sound of surprise. Your hands reached out for them, as delicate as possible.

Chilchuck felt like his face was a bit too hot for something as simple as this, but it’s been such a long time since he’s had to really woo anyone. How the hell did he manage to do this all those years ago? Scratching the back of his head, he broke the silence between the two of you.

“They’re your favorites, right? I happened to see ‘em and thought you’d be happy.”

Although Chilchuck felt like he was doing a piss poor job at this, you felt like you were swooning all over again. You know how much he used actions as a love language, yet could you even call it that in this situation? Friends did nice things for each other, yet…

His brows were furrowed in determination, the tips of his ears rosy and suddenly you felt like maybe there was something there. Your gaze fell to the buds in your hands, freshly picked and done so with care. The smile that made its way on your features was unabashed.

“Yes, yes they’re my favorites… I can’t believe you remembered that. Let me go get something to put them in. Thank you so much, Chil.”

It was worth it just to see you smile like that. Even if he felt a little ridiculous at the action, it paid off when you held the vase proudly in your hands. “I’m going to put them on my desk. I love them…” You spoke softly, your own cheeks turning that shade of pink he loved so much. For a few moments, it became silent again, his brain scrambling for what to say next.

“You asked me about my plans after our adventure was over. There… was something I wasn’t honest about. And I want to be honest about it now.”

Chilchuck made sure to correctly word everything he needed to say. Taking time in between his sentences, his gaze returned to yours. There was something there that you had only hoped you’d seen in the past; a taste of desire.

“I want to be there for you. I know we’re no longer coworkers, so…” The words fell silent, you remaining patient through his pauses. Softly, you gave a gentle phrase of reassurance. “You’re already there for me, I know that, Chil—”

Raising a hand, he silenced you. Contemplation took over his features, that worry line between his brows that you always found endearing still making an appearance. You waited for him to elaborate.

“…As more than friends.”

Your heart stopped. Did you hear him correctly? Certainly you did, your voice having gotten stuck in your throat as you tried to wrap your head around the weight those words carried. Was he saying that, this whole time, you’ve been a goal all along? Hearing your name, you snapped your attention back to him.

“I want to be more honest with how I feel. I know how I used to be, and I’m working towards fixing it.” His deep brown eyes held a small glimmer of hope, of vulnerability. Chilchuck was trying, and he was trying for you.

Feeling as if the wind was knocked out of your lungs, you asked shakily, “You want…?”

He smiled, a small etch in his features. Huffing, Chilchuck fiddled with the collar of his shirt. “You’re really gonna make me spell it out for you? I… Have feelings for you. If you don’t feel the same I get it, don’t—“

Before he could finish his sentence, you hurriedly set the flowers down before just about tackling him. The shock of hearing him say exactly what you’d been wishing for so long melted into a need to relay exactly how you felt. Chilchuck grunted at the impact, nearly toppling over.

“Of course I feel the same! You think I’d put up with your grumpy ass for this long if I didn’t?” You couldn’t help the teasing words that followed, pulling away from him to grin widely at him. “Can I kiss you?”

Your excitement caught him even more off guard, eyes widening at your question. “Sorry, that was probably a bit too much—“

Instead of giving you a verbal answer, Chilchuck tugged you to his lips in a desperate attempt to get you to just shut up and do it. You happily obliged, only pulling away to ask one more question. “How long?”

Chilchuck panted, confusion evident on his features. “What?”

“How long have you felt this way?” Your curiosity was getting the better of you, wondering just how long you two had managed to dance around each other like this. Chilchuck sighed, giving the only answer he could think to say:

“Too long.”

— dividers by @/cafekitsune! <3

[meo-eiru]

The house is quiet—almost too quiet—except for the gentle hum of the ceiling fan above me. I sit by the window, watching the sun set behind the hills. It's beautiful, peaceful even…

Micah is out in the yard, tending to the garden. He loves that garden. It reminded me the first time I had met him, back when I was still a novitiate, he told me it was important to grow things, to nurture life. I wonder sometimes if that’s what he thinks he's doing with me. Nurturing me. But plants don't have a choice where they grow, do they? They’re just put somewhere, and they either thrive or wither.

When he moved us to this town, he said it was for us. For our new family. He said it was to keep us safe, to give us a fresh start. I wanted to believe him. I tried to believe him. I think I even did, for a while. I used to tell myself that this was God’s plan, that this was my path, even if it wasn't the one I had chosen. Maybe it still is. But God seems distant now, like He stayed behind when we left.

I run a hand over my stomach, feeling the faint fluttering of life inside me.

Our child.

The house was large, larger than necessary for the two of us— three, once the baby is born. There were rooms I hadn’t stepped into for days. Micah had insisted that I rest, that I focus on the baby. Don’t tire yourself, dear, he would say, brushing a strand of hair from my face.

I had tried, in the beginning, to insist that I could go out on my own, that I could walk the streets without his constant watch. But each attempt was met with that close-eyed smile, the same one he wore when locking the door each morning.

What if something happened to you? he would ask, as though I were a child who couldn’t understand the dangers of the world. And then he would bring me gifts— books, flowers, anything to keep me content. See how much I love you? the gifts seemed to say. See how well I take care of you?

It's like he’s keeping score, like every smile I give him is another point in his favor.

There was no one to talk to. Only Micah, and the walls of this house, and the life growing inside me.

The prayers that once came so easily to my lips were gone, replaced by whispers of doubt and fear. Did God still hear me, here in this place so far from His light?

AAAAAAAAA IT WAS SO GOOD AGAIN!!!

If anyone wants to read what they wrote about Micah and reader meeting for the first time before!

You did such a good job writing him, if anyone is wondering this is pretty accurate to how Micah would handle getting his darling pregnant!

[just-a-ghost00]

The way you make me feel ~

Images found on Pinterest. Deck used : golden thread tarot. Reading written from their POV.

Group 1

Hermit, Temperance, Queen of pentacles, The Magician, knight of pentacles, ace of pentacles

You make me feel safe. Cared for. Loved in ways I never thought were possible. Nurtured. Understood. Appreciated, not only because of my work or my wealth but solely for who I am as a person. You make me feel strong. Like the world is at the tip of my fingers and all I got to do is to reach further to make my wildest dreams come true. You make me feel strong. Determined. Wise. With you, everything seems so simple. So bright and warm. You make me feel like time has stopped and it's just the two of us. I feel like I am in a bubble. A cozy cocoon that was made just for me. I feel like I belong somewhere. Like finally, after so many trials and errors, I get to be rewarded. I feel so blessed to have you in my life. I still wonder how all of this is possible. You make me want to believe in magic again. I feel like I'm walking on a line, perfectly balanced and at peace with myself, reassured by the thought that whatever I decide to do, whichever way I decide to go, you'll be there to catch me if I fall. Like you'll always follow me and never leave my side. I feel so happy I could cry. You make me feel like everything is possible and nothing can stop me from my success. I feel invicible with you by my side. You make me want to believe in myself and move forward with my head held high, slowly but surely, at my own pace, on my own terms. With you I feel secure, confident in my ability to create a life I can be proud of, to embody a person that people can look up to with respect in their eyes. You make me feel grand, so much bigger than I am. You bring so much in my life that I don't know how I could ever thank you. In your presence, I feel like I am given a second chance at life. Like my time has come and I can be born again.

Group 2

10 of swords, 4 of wands, Temperance, 9 of pentacles, Hanged man, ace of wands

You make me feel puzzled. I don't know if I should be mad at you or adore you. You get on my nerves and yet you make me so proud. With you I feel like I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't feel as lonely as I used to be. I feel like I can hope for a better future than what I've been handed so far. I feel like I can overcome my fears and face any obstacle coming my way. Like I am worthy of love and interest. I feel alive again. I feel hopeful about the future and inspired to move forward. My creativity has rocketed. I feel triggered. Like everything I thought I knew is complete BS and that honestly shakes me and upsets me in a way. I feel like I have to start all over again, like my work wasn't enough and as good as I thought it was. You make me feel like focusing on myself and taking care of my own goals isn't as bad as it sounds. That I too am capable of creating a reality I can be proud of. Like my unique perception of life and lonely nature can actually be an asset and a driving force. You give me the courage to face my demons and be a better person. You make me feel like I can tip the scales in my favor and change the course of action. Like life isn't as harsh and bad as I thought it was. Like I can be whole again and enjoy the pleasures this world has to offer. You make me feel bold and curious again. You make me want to celebrate and have fun, to shift my perspective and learn. You challenge me. And as much as that confuses me that also sets me free. I'm not sure why or how you do this but I thank you for the clarity you bring into my life.

Group 3

Empress, 8 of pentacles, 8 of cups, High Priestess, 9 of pentacles, 10 of swords

You make me feel whole. Worthy of love and attention. Beautiful. Valuable. You make me feel powerful and important. Like all the worries in the world are nothing for I am stronger than this. With you I feel like there will never be a day where I feel sad again. Like I can tackle anything and turn dust into gold. You make me feel fearless. With you, the dark and sorrow don't sound as scary as they once were. You make me feel like my despair is over. Like my prayers have finally been answered. But I also feel scared. Scared that my depth and darkness will have a repelling effect on you. I fear that the more I grow, the more chances I have of losing you. You make me feel attractive. You make me want to love myself more and work harder to be a version of myself I will adore. You make me feel human. For the first time in my life I feel like I don't have to apologize for who I am. You make me feel understood, seen and appreciated. With you I feel protected. I feel like sadness can no longer hold me down. You make me want to reach higher heights and set higher goals, to prove everyone how wrong they were of underestimating me. You make me want to fight. You make me feel like I can own the world. Like I can finally stand in my power and embrace the entirety of my being without shame nor fear. You make me feel brand new, like I am reborn, like I have everything to gain and nothing to lose. You make me want to go beyond my limits and transform my being, to heal my wounds and move on once and for all from my past. I can't find the words to describe how much this means to me.

[elodieunderglass]

It's not really my business, but honestly it feels like it would be advisable to hire a copyright lawyer. Like I don't feel like you're in it for the money, but it might be gratifying to have the guy milking your idea at least have to formally acknowledge you. I think I'd do it just for the peace of mind to know if I've been "legally" wronged or not. Either way, hope you continue to inspire, and live out a peaceful life.

(In reference to this post about the guy who pretends to have invented “Elder Teletubbies,” specifically how he is now kickstarting DnD minis of them.)

Ha, well, it’s all a little tricky I think. I might, hilariously, post on the r/legaladvice Reddit (even though they’re all cops lol) because the only thing I want here is for him to stop selling my “transformative work,” and ideally to stop pretending he invented it (which might be difficult as he appears to fully believe his work is creatively independent.)

I think if anything, my post counts as protected commentary or a transformative work of BBC’s Teletubbies, and I think it’s stinky to profit on that stuff in general (like I’m 190% okay with buying LotR fanart on stickers ! but I wouldn’t dream of trying to publish a fic with the serial numbers filed off. Why?)

I think ultimately I’m not a grifter, I’m a grownup, and I think it’s several levels of eye roll to sell fanart of a tv show on this level. I would be embarrassed to touch money made on that. I’m too fucking scrupulous and artisanal. I have toyed with a silly original novel for funsies since 2019 but keep saying things like, “oh, people will think this is too similar to something else that already exists” as if a silly original novel I write for fun has to somehow pass a Bar of Originality higher than anything salary-writers aim for.

I’m also pretty anti-intellectual-property myself in that leftist sense where I don’t believe people should be acting as if creative works are, like, oil. Like the resource extraction angle of intellectual property freaks me out, I don’t think getting super high-horse and snotty about Magical Brain Property is entirely compatible with the artisanal temperament I personally got going on here. I am like snufkin about this, simply smoking a pipe and making a flower crown saying “poor fools! Producing works for market, and serving as the guard dogs of the market, lest their work lose value if it becomes more common!” I do not have a high horse. I am not going to post 6900 words about the importance of defending fucking… Mickey Mouse. I buy those lotr stickers on Etsy! I do have a horse, but it’s a pretty low horse.

If it was his own work I would not care about this guy doing this in the least (apart from loftily calling it stinky - but hey, nerds are common and nerds are stinky, it’s not rare) IF he wasn’t STEALING FROM MY ANTI-COMMERCIALISATION DREAM TO DO IT.

That’s the bit that PISSES ME OFF too much to ignore: that and accepting compliments for being original like 😌 yes my twisted mind did this idk lol.

Like if you asked him point blank about the artistic choices he’d be like idk my twisted mind just sees the Teletubbies this way teehee! but if you ask ME why, for example, the adult Teletubbies live in the forest I’ll explain that in 2017 I was at a major life crossroads and this dream was ABOUT that. It was goodbye to my identity as a foreigner from the pine forests, and full steam ahead to settling permanently in the fucking shire (where the baby teletubbies on the bbc show live). It was about going back to work having had my first child, and saying goodbye to my various career dreams for myself (famous scientist! Published author!) as I chose instead, finally, the responsibility of working humbly as a public servant for the actual good of society. It is about witnessing the wild and saying “I am not of it, but it is my job to be its witness and voice.” That’s why the adult Teletubbies are dancing in my native forests while I’m watching them from the English hills. This guy doesn’t know that he just vaguely heard “spooky forest cryptid” and didn’t develop it at all, I do more work than that with FANFICTION in my time off!!!

So it’s really about nebulous stuff and ethics and not something worth paying a lawyer for I think!

But thank you so much for this, I think the thing that gets most perennial about it is the TOTAL GASLIGHTING of the “outside world” of the rest of the internet like, fully believing they invented this, and they DIDNT. They’re so wrong on the internet and they don’t know

[shuenkio]

SECRET GIFT | ˚⋆୨୧˚

Paring: Jungwon x male!reader

Cw: mentioned of dick, masturbate, whimpers, cum in mouth.

Genre: Small nsfw.

Summary: When he surprised you with an unexpected gift.

Read at your own risk.

None- proof read ><

Lack of perfect words.

Your love story with Jungwon began like a gentle whisper. You were the kind of person who preferred to secretly admire from afar, too shy to express your feelings. That all changed when he stumbled upon your life, quite literally. On his first day on campus, he tripped over his own feet and twisted his ankle. As fate would have it, it was you who came to his rescue. Your caring nature and warm personality melted his heart, and in that moment, your connection took flight.

Initially, you saw Jungwon as an innocent soul, a blank canvas brimming with sweetness and charm. The adorable dimples on his face made you want to protect him at all costs. But little did you know that behind that innocent façade, Jungwon was hiding a deeper, more passionate side. On Christmas day, 25th December, you engaged in a playful exchange of gifts. You surprised him with a promise ring, leaving him in tears as he realized the depth of your love. From that moment on, your relationship deepened, shaped by the unique dynamics between you two.

Today, Jungwon was more determined than ever to win the gift exchange, his competitive spirit evident in his confident demeanor. As night fell, you heard a knock on the door of your shared apartment. Opening it revealed Jungwon, a mischievous grin spread across his face. In his hands was a carefully wrapped gift. As your curiosity piqued and your fingers itched to see what was inside, Jungwon only held it out of reach, teasing you playfully. You couldn't help but feel a mix of intrigue and frustration, wondering what surprise awaited within.

*Inside the apartment*

As you sit down with Jungwon in your beautifully decorated apartment, the scent of roses and candlelight fills the air. The Christmas season is in full swing, with the apartment adorned with festive decorations. Enjoying a delicious meal together, you both chat casually about your day, savoring the peaceful atmosphere.

With the main course finished, the true excitement of the gift exchange begins. You hand Jungwon your gift, eagerly waiting for his reaction. He carefully unwraps the present, a mix of curiosity and anticipation on his face.

As Jungwon open the gift, his eyes light up at the sight of the small snow globe inside. A rush of nostalgia washes over him, transporting him back to his childhood years when he first discovered the magic of these trinkets.

He becomes lost in its gentle beauty, his gaze fixed on the swirling snowflakes within. Memories flood his mind, recalling how much joy the snow globe brought him as a child. With a soft smile on his face, he gently holds the snow globe close, cherishing the moment of connection to his past self.

"How- how did you know i love this?" He's stutter, processing how much you about him.

"Your old picture back in the day, i seen every single one of yours, holding this snow globe!" You said. Chuckle at how surprised he's now which give you nothing but a warm feeling.

Jungwon chuckles softly, a tinge of warmth and fondness in his voice. His eyes still fix on the snow globe in his hands.

"Ah, those days..." he muses, a nostalgic smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"I can still picture myself looking at this little snow globe with such glee. I can't believe you still remember that picture. You know me too well, love"

"Now where's my gift darling ~" you asked for the gift. You know that you'll always accept everything he has offer for you, eveb if it's a letter.

You can't help but grin eagerly as Jungwon hands you his gift, your excitement evident on your face. Despite the small size of the package, you know that Jungwon always manages to choose the perfect presents that touch your heart. Taking the tiny box, your hands tremble with anticipation as you carefully remove the wrapping. With a mix of curiosity and joy, you open it to reveal a small letter inside.

"I have nothing other than my love m/n, let's create more memory together i love you 사랑해 >3" You chin turn into a pout, the emotion rush into your face, like you're about to form a tears.

"Babe-- you're so sweet I'm gonna cry"

"I've always love you m/n, but did you read all of my letters?" You tilt your head slightly, before flip the letter to it back and see more words on it.

"The real gift is me?" You read it out loud, furrow your eyebrows slightly, the next thing you know, his half lower body become naked, with a Christmas's bow clenching on his member, only an unbutton shirt clinging on his body.

"What" You face turn into a watermelon color, it's so hot in your point of vew, that you almost get nosebleeds.

He's also shy too, but he shrugged it off let you enjoy the view, waiting for your response.

"Y-you naked and—"

"You like it? I know you always think I'm all cotton candy, but you're wrong babe, I'm as wild as you"

"As wild as who? W-hat?"

"Don't act silly babe, you're masturbate in our bathroom almost everyday aren't you"

The blood rushes to your cheeks, turning them a bright red, How did he found out about you, pleasuring yourself even though you're tried all your best to cover it. Slowly, Jungwon closes the distance between you, gently cupping your cheeks in his palm. He leans in and brushes a soft kiss against the tip of your nose.

"You want me didn't you? Now that I've won, you have to do anything as i say, right?" He said, his eyes full of lust and desire, in a heart shape, Jungwon's natural blush spreads across his face, which turn you on even more.

In a moment of passion, Jungwon presses his lips against yours, claiming your mouth in a fierce kiss. The intense of the moment leaves you breathless, overwhelmed by the taste, wet lip and feel of his kiss as it deepens. while his naughty hand slide down lower and lower to your neck, rubbing your collarbone as he unbuttoned your shirt one by one until your chest got exposed completely.

You surrender to his desires, allowing him to take control in the moment. As the winner of the gift exchange. and you wouldn't lie when you see his dick twitching in pre-cum and being exposed at the sight, touching your stomuch is just click the button, turning you on like crazy, along with the tie bow wrapped around his crotch, make him looks cute and hot at the same time.

Your hand holding on around his shoulder as you dipping his head pressed against yours harder, leaving no space between you two, let him ruinyour lip till it's red swollen.

His snake-like-hand continue to careless your collarbone, making you're tickled Before squeezing your nipples until it's hard, as your groans let out during the make out session.

"I want you m/n and i know you want me too, do you want to do this with me?" Despite the intensity of the moment and the passion you share, Jungwon remains sensitive and thoughtful, he pauses to seek your consent, ensuring that you are comfortable and willing to doing this m together. You are overwhelmed by a wave of admiration and gratitude, knowing that you have found the love of your life who's perfect inside out.

You nodded in eagerness, wanted to continue as he's smirk in satisfied.

"Do you want you to warm up or doing it raw?" He ask, still asking for your opinion. You respond that you want to take things slow before jumping into it, so he fulfill your wish.

He let you kneel down on the floor, pose his hip a lil more to front, while his hand stroking on his own cock, Pulling the foreskin up and down to expose the head of his crotch.

You spare no more time, didn't hold it back, before grabbing on his shaft, stroking him without his instructions. Your other hand move to his balls, play with it, squeezing it in a seductive manner. The sensation of your talents hand on him, send him a jolted inside his body, as he huffs at the pressured you gave him.

Despite how sensitive he is, in just a few minutes of stroking, he feel like he's on the edge already, his uncut foreskin's moving by your palm non stop, drawing him more and more closer to his climax.

To his surprised, you know he's already in mid way of coming, so you slam your lip, taking all his throbbing inside your mouth in one go, starlets him in a flame of ecasty,as his leg began to trembling and shaking, throwing his head up, facing the ceiling at your unpredictable blow job.

"You're so good m/n, who teaches you all of this Ahhh" he cried out, his whine small moaning, giving you an unknown motivated to suck the life out of him.

He whimpers like a lil boy, squirming in pleasure, as his body signaling him, he's almost reaching his perk.

"I'm about to cum — you sure you don't want to let me cum outside your mouth? — NGH" You reply back with your eyes, knowing that he's about to release, you processing to swirling your tongue on the tip of his length inside your mouth, in circles. Leaving him breathless, with his heartbeat become more shudder in arousal.

In one last jerk, his cum splashing out, inside your throat, pushing the back of your head to take him deeper as he's crushing his hip forward pressed harder against your pretty lip, filled you in with his hot orgasm that he has been saving for a week for this moment.

"P-please swallow it" he said in his embarrassed tone, requesting you to take all his semen. You gulp down all his cum licking all the remaining that leaking from your lip.

"Do you want more babe?" You mumble, asking if he wants more, but you hear nothing from the boy, as he dropped himself down on the chair for a support, his body is numb right now with all arousal he had never felt before, this is the first time of masturbating that hit his sweet spot.

"My tip is.... Huff huff... Very much sensitive right now, let's continue later" he answer in his shaking voice, proving that he's pretty worn out.

You smile happily, enjoy what you just did with him, he's one in a million and it's only for you.

🗣️ please mind my English! ><

🗣️ Reblog and like is much appreciated ♥

🗣️ crd to all pics÷rs

🗣️ I'm suck at summary in this work, so I use some help from bot 🫠 that's why when it's smut, it's different pardon me ><

[doudouma]

“you have 3 WIVES and a HUSBAND?!”

what it’s like being uzui’s husband!reader with his wives!

_______________________________________________

╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗

◆ greetings, my lovely lotuses! thank you so much for all 97 votes! with the winning option on my poll, uzui and his 3 wives & husband, please enjoy♡〜

there are no warnings, my dear lotus.

reader is male.❀ 〜

a/n : i had a feeling these headcanons would win the poll, especially since it seems unique〜 apologies if these may come out as short !

╚══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╝

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

ooo… such a beautiful relationship〜!

being tengen’s husband… such a delightful thing..

mainly because you have a loving husband AND loving wives♡

with a side of chaos due to makio and suma, never a boring day

as the second man, it’ll be a semi-unspoken rule to help tengen out with the ladies, to help balance things out.

he’s outnumbered by women, after all〜

and they would certainly help you out too! with anything as well, they wouldn’t mind.

you most likely met tengen by being a shinobi or demon slayer. especially since the wives are kunoichi.

they all wouldn’t treat you no different from how they treat each other, and they all say “i love you” in their own way♡

“my flamboyant m/n.. you returned back to me after your mission, and saved countless of lives. you’re a very strong man, im very proud of you.” (pats head)

“i appreciate the things you do for me, so i helped you out with things you needed done today. i wanted to return the favor for you, m/n.♡”

“m/n, m/n!!!! i’m so glad you’re back, why didn’t you return sooner?! do you know how worried you had me?! i was trying not to think of your grave so soon!!!”

“i said i didn’t need any help with the laundry, you know!!!! i could’ve done it myself, it was my job, not yours, m/n!!! ..but thanks.”

the wives love to do your hair, cook with you, talk about their day, and absolutely love to cuddle!♡

tengen would love gift you things with meaning, do small things for you that you forgot, making jokes and teasing you, talking about anything while you two cook for the wives, and love to cuddle too!♡

sometimes the wives forget theres only one of you, so coming home from a mission with all of them ecstatic to see you.. can be a bit overwhelming.

tengen to the rescue!

tengen would usually step in and calm them down, and the five of you would reunite once again in peace〜

he would also be very excited about being put on missions with you!

he’d protect you with his life, and would internally melt if you protected him. even while he tells you to prioritize your life over his♡

on times where you, tengen and the wives all go on missions together, it’s quite fun, and you all feel safer together than apart.

the hashiras may never hear the end of his flamboyant husband, and he’d constantly boast about you! even if you’re right next to him.. he doesn’t care.

i know for a fact rengoku will tell tengen, “you have too many spouses!” my, my rengoku

he wouldn’t mind rengokus jokes, because he knows you’re happy with him and he’s happy with you!

he absolutely adores the fact that you and the wives bond so well, the wives loves you way more than he thought they would!

of course not in a bad way. it makes him feel so happy inside, a very soft feeling of comfort.

if someone ever wronged you, you best believe you’d have four people behind you ready to fight! and since you love them, you’ll fight for them too.

you all have each others backs, no matter the circumstance of any kind, and would go unmeasurable lengths for one another.

such a true strong bond of mutual love and trust. nothing and no one will be able to separate you all♡

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

wow, wow…. this took way longer than i expected!! lotuses, my heavy apologies, i’ve been busy with other things. surprisingly this was a little hard to write, and brung out a side in me that i didn’t know existed of being a uzui fan… thank you for your patience, my precious flowers❀

psps… send requests〜!

[esmedelacroix]

All the ways I defy you.

pairing: exboyfriend!miguel o'hara x f!reader

summary: Since the end of your relationship, Miguel has been acting strange. At home, at work, and even around his own friends. He even goes so far as to break work rules all, for you?

cw: very angsty, depressive behaviors, tiny suggestive part

a/n: Hey! Just wanted to say thanks so much for all the love on the first part I uploaded a while ago! This is coming to you very late I know. I was a bit stressed with finals and moving out of my dorm. Here's part two, I hope you enjoy it! A comment, like, or repost is always appreciated.

previous part | miguel masterlist

*listen to this song on loop for the best experience !

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Of course, when I thought that I could rid her of my life for good, the universe sent her flying in my direction. I do not want to be near her. Not because I hate her but because I know I make her upset. I don't want her to be around someone she associates terrible feelings with(me). Yet there she was drenched at our front door.

"I'm currently on the hunt for an apartment, but I didn't know this was going to happen—so—sniff—I'll have to stay here for a while. Is that okay?" my sweet girl asked as she averted her eyes. Drenched in rain, runny mascara, and her tears. Voice quivering and body shaking.

"Yes, of course, yeah, come in," I responded a bit too quickly, opening my door wider for her to enter. I stepped aside and rummaged through the bathroom getting her a warm fluffy towel.

"Um, I'll take the couch so you can sleep in our—my room," I said, correcting myself. Which only made her tears spill more.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes, you'll catch a cold if you don't," I assured.

"Do you even care?" she muttered under her breath.

Yes, Of course I do baby you're my everything.

"I'll be in my office if you need anything," I sighed.

. . .

Sleeping uncomfortably on your couch is not for that week. But that didn't compare to the feeling of hearing my ex-girlfriend crying herself to sleep in the bed we once shared. Our physical proximity was so close. All I had to do was get up, open the door, and cuddle her. Tell her everything is going to be okay.

How can one be so close to someone but so far at the same time? The paradox of my situation with my ex-girlfriend tore my heart, mind, and body apart.

Just then her cries and sniffs died down and I could hear her familiar soft snore that she swore she didn't have. When I closed my eyes to sleep, the first thought that came to my head was her. Her sleeping form. How peaceful her face looked. The way her chest rose and fell as she breathed. My perfect girl was the first and last thing I thought about. Her mere existence in my imagination had lulled me to sleep. Fuck, I made a mistake letting her go, I thought to myself.

. . .

"Hobie Brown," I said sternly.

"I already know, I get it, but things happen, mate," he shrugged, foreseeing the lecture he was about to receive from me.

"No, I don't think you 'get it' because you broke one of the only three key rules you have to follow here," I interjected.

"Just let him off the hook this time," Gwen interrupted.

"No. I can't. You, Miles, and Pavitr could learn from this as well. Don't disrupt the canon, report to me after every single mission, and never, ever, ever leave your post," I lectured.

"What if something important happens?" Miles questions.

"Nothing is more important than keeping the canon intact," I snapped.

"At this rate, you and your girlfriend will break up before I finish my written report. She must really enjoy your relationship; If you could even call it that," Hobie smirked as he walked away.

That shut me up. Because what he predicted was not far from reality. Are my rules too much? I couldn't say anything back to him because he might have been correct. For the first time ever Hobie Brown got the last word. The rest of the afternoon I reflected on myself and my rules. Not leaving your post is important, I told myself.

. . .

"I got your text," Peter B sighed as he took a seat next to Miguel in the cafeteria.

"You broke up with her?" he asked, quivering a brow.

"Yeah, it was just too much," I sighed, rubbing my hand along my face.

"What do you mean? She's like the best thing to ever happen to you. The first time I ever saw you genuinely laugh was the day you brought her to work and she kept cracking the worst dad jokes. And you're telling me you broke up with her?" he rambled.

"Peter, I was making her unhappy," I admitted.

"Then just stop making her unhappy. It's as easy as that. Knowing her, she probably communicated what was bothering her with you too," he said sternly.

"I can't just stop following protocol," I said, stating the obvious.

"For her? For the women you love? You should be able to," Peter sighed. My lungs felt like they had been attacked by a million bees. Palms were sweating buckets at the mere thought of experiencing my baby Gabriella disappear in my arms again. Her painful screams filled my ears. The grief-stricken reality that her daddy, her "hero", couldn't save her. Amid my miniature panic attack, Peter placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. Successfully pulled me from the nightmare I was reliving back into the present.

"But, Peter, Gabi, I—I can't let that happen again. What if a parent, just like me and you, loses their kid the same way I did? I just-I can't do it. I have to keep the canon undisturbed," I said, stumbling over my words.

"Miguel, that isn't going to happen again, you have us now. You have help," Peter said a little softer, noticing that he hit a nerve.

"I would never forgive myself if millions of families, partners, and could-have-been end or cease to exist because of me," I admitted.

"Miguel, if you were to leave your post, you would have someone fill in for you. You give yourself all of these extra jobs that you don't need to be doing," Peter insisted.

"But if I don't do it, someone's going to make a mistake," I insisted.

"Or you can trust in the people that you hand-picked for this job," Peter suggested.

"It's more complicated than that," I rebutted.

"No, it really isn't. You're just making it more complicated. You need to trust in your team," he finished.

"And maybe get your girl back?" he suggested as he got up to get Mayday from Gwen's lap to go change her diapers.

. . .

You called out of work sick. Truthfully, you were glued to the bed. You didn't have the desire to get up or do much of anything. You hadn't showered that morning or eaten breakfast. All you did was stare at the ceiling, out the window, and the framed photo of you and Miguel that he hadn't put away yet.

Tears stained your cheeks, your eyes swelled to oblivion, and your stomach was empty and practically eating itself. The refrigerator called out to me but I didn't answer. I couldn't. Does he even care like I do? You asked yourself.

Staring blankly at the limewash accent wall of your once-shared room that you were considered a guest in. Just then your phone rang. You shot up and immediately checked who it was. You shamelessly smiled when the contact name "my miguel 💕" popped up on your screen. You clicked the answer button after taking a deep breath.

"Hello?" you said.

"Hi, you're probably at work right now, sorry to be a bother," he started.

"No, not at all. I called out today. I've been feeling under the weather," you assured.

"Do you want me to bring you anything for dinner? I'm going to get Chinese takeout tonight," he said.

"Yeah, I'll have whatever you're having," you responded.

"Okay, I'll be back around 7:00 with dinner. You know where the medicine is, take care of yourself please," he assured.

"Okay, I'll be expecting you," you replied before hanging up first.

He told you he'd be home around seven but you didn't count on it. He broke most promises anyway.

You decided to finally shower and have a small snack. You sat on the couch with your Kindle in hand. The couch smelled like him. The throw pillows smelled like his lavender-scented shampoo. You couldn’t help but wrap yourself in the blankets he had used the night before. It didn’t compare his hugs but it was good enough for now.

You spent some time reading some romance novels. Putting yourself in the shoes of the heroine and pretending that the love interest was him. Pretending that it was Miguel who ran all the way to your house while it was raining to hold you and wipe your tears in the dead of the night. Instead, you sat in your living room wondering whether or not he would actually do that for you.

You heard keys in the door and it opened soon after. You got up and slowly approached it with a pillow in hand as a weapon. You had no idea who could be dropping by the apartment at this time. Just then Miguel turned the corner takeout in hand and you wound up to hit the perpetrator. “Whoa calm down, it’s just me,” Miguel chuckled.

You let out a long exhale in relief. “I just wasn’t expecting you to be home so early,” he sighed as you put the pillow back on the couch.

“What do you mean? I said I’d be here around this time and you said and I quote, ‘I’ll be expecting you’,” he teased.

“Well I’m just kind of used to you saying things and not delivering,” you said under your breath loud enough for him to hear as you helped him unpack the food he got and set it on the living room coffee table.

“Well I decided to be less of a dick today,” he quipped.

“Should’ve done that when we were still together,” you answered half-joking.

He gave you an apologetic look. His mouth opened then closed. Like he wanted to say something but he stopped himself. Like he always did. I wish you could tell me what’s on your mind, you thought to yourself.

“I’ve been pretty shitty huh?” he said with a pained expression on his face.

“It’s not your fault,” you assured taking a seat next to him.

He put something random on Netflix to watch while you got water for the two of you. As usual, he never read the synopsis of anything he watched and accidentally put on 365 days. Classic Miguel. “Oh god, this is a bit inappropriate,” he commented, almost choking on his lo mien.

“It’s nothing we’ve never done before,” you smirked.

You watched his cheeks flush out of the corner of your eyes. He hugged the my melody plush you had gifted him a while ago a little tighter. He adjusted his glasses sheepishly.

You recalled the time you asked him about his glasses. Him being ashamed when he admitted that he needed to use glasses whenever he looked at a screen because played too many video games as a kid.

Suddenly, the TV blended in with all the other noises in the background. The sounds of cars honking on the streets outside the window, the rain constantly hitting the top of the air conditioner, the soft hum of the drying machine, and the—tick—tock—of the clock on the wall.

It was just you and Miguel in that room then. Stealing glances at each other. Contemplating whether or not you should release the many unspoken words bottled up inside. “I’m moving out in 2 days. I found a place,” you said, breaking the silence.

“Oh, that’s….great. Seriously, good for you,” he says looking away. What you didn’t know was that Miguel wasn’t congratulating you. He was trying to convince himself that you leaving was a good thing. That it was good for you and for him. That it was everything he wanted.

You could hear the pain in his voice and although you could see his face. You knew the downcast expression that was painted on it.

. . .

Two days went by way too quickly. Two days of sleeping on the couch. Two days of coming home early and on time to spend time with my loved ones before she left. Two days of baking sweet treats while we watched Romance movies. Two days of soaking in her presence before it was completely gone from my life.

As soon as I knew it, that morning when I decided to help her move her things out instead of going to work. I put Jess in charge of the morning instead which she was ecstatic about.

Once the final box was loaded in the moving truck we faced each other at the front door. The front door I’ve her drunk body through. The front door we used to kiss at when we couldn’t wait to get in our house. The front door she knocked at with all of her stuff when we decided to move in together. The front door where I would chase after her after an argument. The front door I revealed I was Spiderman at. The front door she came to drenched with rain in tears the day I broke up with her. Which was now the front door that we would say our last goodbyes at.

We looked into each other's eyes for a good 30 seconds. Tears filled her eyes and mine. "Just, come here big guy," she sighed, opening her arms to me.

I was hesitant. If I touched I was afraid I wouldn't want to let go and I would hold on forever. All I could control was the now. So I pushed those thoughts of fear away and I held her. Her arms wrapped around my waist. One of my hands rested on her back while the other was on the back of her head caressing her hair. For once I built up the courage to say what was on my mind without holding myself back. I took a deep breath in before admitting, "I'll miss you,"

"I still love you," she replied before letting go and walking out the door for the last time.

I heard the door click and it was final. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

. . .

I felt lighter as I walked down the hallway to my office. Memories of her still played endlessly in my head but I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulder when I took Peter's advice and split my jobs up with my coworkers.

Today most of the spider society would be in Pavitr's universe catching any extra anomalies that slipped under our radar. As well as closing the quantum hole that was starting to form. We had almost all hands on deck in this assignment and I would be leading it.

The mission reached a new height for us when a Prowler variant from a different universe was found. Gwen and I were on him while also trying to keep the streets and civilians safe. Peter joined us soon after he finished his task. Just when we had cornered him, my watch began to ring. The contact name appeared as "Mi Corazon" and my heart dropped. My heart dropped because the only way she could call me on my watch was with the emergency one I had made for her. She was in trouble. I looked around at Peter and Gwen and they both urged me to answer. "If you need to go, you should go," Peter said, fighting off the Prowler who took this as an advantage to strike.

"Don't worry about us, we got this," Gwen called out, giving Peter a hand while looking back at me.

"But, I can leave my post. I made that rule," I stuttered as the ringing of my watch heightened my nerves. Peter gave me a look

"For her? For the women you love? You should be able to," the words played through my head as the worst possible time.

I can't, I can't do it. I have to stay, I thought to myself.

"You should be able to," I told myself.

As I battled with myself in my head, Peter snapped me out of it. "Answer that call, Miguel. I'm sure you'll regret it later if you don't. We got it covered. Trust in us? Please?" he called out.

Every cell in my body and even my brain told me not to answer the call and not to leave my post. But every beat in my heart and whisper of my soul told me to answer the damn call. So I did.

. . .

I had never swung through the streets of Nueva York faster than I was now. Her little voice fueled me even though biologically I should have no energy right now.

"Miguel I need you, I need you right now,"

If a branch was in my way I simply swung through. They would hit my body and bruise me a bit but none of that mattered right now.

"Someone broke into my house,"

Tears began to form in my eyes wondering if she was okay. If she was safe. “ You still there baby?” I asked as I swung past building upon building.

“Yeah—sniff—I’m here,” she replied. I let out a relieved sigh.

“Just wait right there, baby. Stay on the line, I’m almost there,” I breathed out.

. . .

You didn’t expect him to drop everything at an important mission for you. That's why you didn’t tell him that you knew who robbed your house.

That’s why you didn’t tell him that your ex-boyfriend had texted you the moment he found you that you and Miguel split up. The same ex was the reason why Miguel had to help you tighten your home security before you moved in with him.

So when Miguel found you on the ground a mess with tears still streaming down your face. You felt as though you had to tell him. "This was Kyle wasn't it?" he asked.

"How'd you know?" you asked, looking up at him, his arms still wrapped around you.

"I had a bodyguard follow you around for a while just to make sure you were okay while I figured out a time to help you install some security here. They noticed a guy was loitering outside of your apartment building a lot but they assumed he was a resident," he explained.

"I'm sorry I called you for this, I'm a mess and you were doing something important, probably," you rambled.

"No, nothing is more important than your safety and your happiness," he interrupted.

"Miguel, you don't have to say that to make me feel better. I know how important holding the Spider-Verse together is to you," you admitted.

"You're more important. So much more important. I'd sit and watch the whole Spider-Verse crumble and burn as long as I’m watching it with you safe in my arms," he confessed, holding you tighter.

"I'm sorry I never told you that sooner. Or showed that in my actions when we were together. There hasn't been a single day I haven't thought about you since I first met you. I thought that by breaking up with you, you'd be happier and you'd be free of me. It's hard being in a relationship with me and it's even harder to love me because I'm so flawed," he continued.

All the things he wanted to say but never dared to say to you spilled out at once.

"I just didn't want you to think I'm weak," he admitted sheepishly.

Shock struck your face. He's been struggling so much and you didn't know. "Oh Miguel, I could never think that. You are the strongest man I know. Once I had to bike up a very steep hill to get a bandage for my little brother who scraped his knee, it was really hard. Another time, I took a test that had 120 multiple-choice questions and two essays in two hours. That—was really hard. But the easiest thing I've ever had to do..." you started as you cupped his cheeks with both of your hands.

"...is love you. It's a pleasure—to love you, Miguel. You are not an inconvenience to me" you assured.

The two of you held each other on the floor of your trashed apartment. For the first time out of many to come, Miguel defied his protocols and the canon for you. He challenged his way of being for you. And he conquered his fear of opening up all to be a better man for you.

"I know it's hard for you to talk to me about what goes on in your head, and we'll work on it but this is a really good start. Thank you," you said.

"Does this mean we're back together? You really want to be with me after all this?" he asked.

"Yes, of course," you chuckled.

"I love you to the moon and back," he sighed.

. . .

to be continued ?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist: @truth-dare-spin-bottles @hobiebrowns-wife @lazyjellyfish300 @scaryplanetdestroyer @lauraolar14 @reader-1290 @prettygirleli @spicydonut25

[streets-in-paradise]

In These Arms - Achilles x (Fem) Trojan!Reader

Warnings: Paris dumped the reader for Helen before she gets to meet Achilles. Includes break up angst + discussion of cheating.

Summary: Heartbroken and publicly humilliated after being abandoned by Paris, you seek peace in the promise of giving up on men without realizing the consequences of his actions would find you one last time.

Turned into a war prisoner and handled to the leader of the myrmidons, the unusual comfort of your master offers you a second chance.

Note: Inspired by two prompt lists by my dear friend @alysinwonderland-at-tea

Angst list - Prompt 4 " Everyone told me you were going to break my heart. I should have listened to them. "

Fluff list - Prompt 2 "I think about you. Ceaselessly."

Tags: @lovelybaka

If everyone else in Troy had reasons for sorrow, on top of theirs you were the most damaged. The man you loved had returned home bringing someone else on his charriot. A stolen queen, woman you didn't have the slightest chance of comparing yourself to given the charm of her famously inhuman beauty. Even when Paris never made any expressed promises priorly, love confessions had once been mutually retributed and you believed in that.

You trusted him going against the advice of many people who attempted to warn you. His own brother had told you that no matter how much he spoke of it, Paris knew nothing about love. Blinded by your feelings, you didn't care, and it turned out the worst mistake of your life.

" Everyone told me you were going to break my heart. I should have listened to them. "

It took you all the strenght you had left not to cry, but at that moment of confrontation it was him the one sobbing in front of you.

" I never meant to! Dear, what I felt for you was real … But it wasn't true love, and I had no way to tell the difference untill I meet Helen. "

You couldn't believe the excuse that was being given to you.

" It was for me, Paris … and because of you I think I will never love again. I gave you everything, but turns out all I am wasn't enough. "

The assumption seemed to have offended him.

" You know I don't mean that! Please, try to understand! "

" What's left to understand? You betrayed your homeland and you betrayed me. You too deserve each other, indeed: a cheater for a cheater … Lovely couple to doom us all! And me the first."

He gave you a hurted look, as if after what he did he still cared for your forgiveness.

" My heart breaks for you, and i am ashamed of myself for the pain i'm causing you … But what can shame do to stop the intensity of love? I would have never accompanied Hector to Sparta if I would have known there I would fall like this for someone else. I couldn't return pretending nothing have happened, and making you live a lie would have been even more unfair than this. You deserve better, I still hold good feelings for you. I swear it on these arms that had comforted you countless times before. "

Paris attempted to pull you closer for a hug, but you stopped him ríght away.

" You humilliated me in front of the entire city! And how strongly I wish I could get granted the mercy of never seeing you again, but Troy is not big enough for that. Blessed is the king of Sparta, who gets the ríght of spreading hate without having to see his wife in the arms of other man every day! Me, instead? I get doomed to watch you smile happyly from afar in the balcony of the palace alongside your mistress for the rest of my life. Do you call that justice, Paris? If that is your mercy, I would rather get your hate. "

In the most twisted way possible, the gods granted at least one of your wishes.

Promising yourself to never love another man ever again after your first love had ended so bitterly, you took the first step into the only path allowed for a woman in your position. With the help of Briseis, who remained your friend despite what happened with her cousin, you seeked to get choosen to take vows in her temple. It was a quick way to restitute your honor in the public eye and be left alone as well. Unfortunately, you didn't get to even try on the priestess robes before the concecuencies of Paris' actions reached you once more.

Greek warriors brought to avenge the husband of his new lover destroyed the temple, killing the priests and taking you prisioner. You would never get to see the great city of Priam again and, despite the sorrow you felt when thinking of your family, that also caused you a dark sense of relief. Because of Paris you have lost everything, even the most bassic of goods such as your freedom. Only after loosing so much, of hitting rock bottom, you had a real chance to be free of him.

Enslaved to Achilles, but liberated from everything you were before, the worst part was having to stand the provocations. The myrmidon enjoyed himself attempting to seduce you, but wasn't forcing you into his bed, and that worked good enough for you in that context.

At one given time you did found his teasing going too far, and only then you became fully honest with him.

" Why did you choose to love a god? I think you will find the romance one sided. "

It made your blood boil, even if you could tell he spoke to you like that because he had no idea of who you were despite knowing your name. Achilles believed to be teasing a priestess and in the discoverment of his mistake you ended up laying eyes on him for longer than you should.

He was wearing the same type of long egyptian styled robes Paris would typically wear in the domestic environment, keeping arms and shoulders covered while fully exposing the torso. It was matched with the same sort of long skirt made of light fabrics opened at the side for more cassual expousure. You could vividly remember he wore a black outfit almost identical to that one during the first night you made love.

And yet, that man looked nothing like him. His sun kissed skin and the sculpted muscles were as contrasting as his blond hair and blue eyes.

" I have choosen nothing, fate forced me to seek shelter in the cult of Apollo after being abandoned by the love of my life. I told myself that, if i could never love again, I could at least give my devotion to the regent god of my city. Because of you I never got to become a priestess, so now i'm a double spoil: rejected for marriage and dragged out of the temple. "

Although standing ríght in front of you, disbelief faded some of the cockiness.

" You won't be rejected here, that's a promise. I had a minor altercate with Ajax because we found you so pretty we both wanted to keep you."

He sat on the ground ríght next to you and observed you with tenderness before taunting you once more.

" Did I ruin your life, or arrived just in time to restaure your faith in men? I don't understand how a girl like you could think of running to hide inside a temple instead of getting herself a better man. "

You answered with the truth, but carefully crafting enough disdain.

" There was nothing I could have done to keep him with me when the competition was the most beautifull woman in the world. The majority of men would have done the same, and that's why I have choosen not to believe in any other ever again. "

Achilles wasn't expecting to find out he was struggling for the attention of the woman that the trojan prince had left behind in his pursuement of the spartan queen.

" Will all mankind pay for the crimes of Paris? That bastard is not even a man. You are so much better without him, consider that perhaps the queen has made you a favor. If he is your reason to give up on men, I have to say it's quite offensive for the rest of us. "

You could tell where his speech was coming and you tried to stop him.

" You would have given me to Ajax if Briseis wouldn't have ran away. I didn't left with her only because I have nothing left to live for. Living in Troy is unbereable for me, but at least here I don't have to worry about seeing them and that's the only perk i expect. Don't try to pretend you could be any different, specially when I'm here because you couldn't find any other more beautifull slave girl to claim yours. "

His hand was then on your face, lifting up your chin so your eyes won't leave his as his thumb caressed your lips.

" I think of you, ceaselessly. If there is any daughter of trojan judged more beautifull than you, I don't need to know and I don't care, because I want you over any other. "

Your hand followed his and pulled down, rejecting his contact.

" Sweet lies won't win me over, not this time. "

It frustrated him, but wouldn't make him desist.

" Would you believe me if I bring you his head on a spear? I can make him cry a painfull death to pay for your tears. Whatever vengeance Menelaus dreams of would be called mercy compared to what I can do to that trojan bastard in your name."

The strange rush of passionate defense encouraged you to reveal yourself.

" Revenge is not on my interest, all I want is to forget. Can you make me stop thinking of the first man who made my heart beat? The moments when we were happy still haunt me like a disease of the spirit, but then I remember someone else occupies my place now and it's like my heart gets eaten raw inside my chest. Pain and regret is all I have for you, son of Peleus. Paris drained me of anything else. "

Achilles got rid of his black robe and wrapped your shoulders with it.

" One night in my arms is all i think that would take me to vanish the memory of that fool from your mind. You haven't yet been loved by a real man: whatever he gave you would taste like few once you would have tasted me."

The fabric was still warm from the contact with his skin and he was holding both sides of it on top of your chest in an attempt of wrapping you tighter.

You didn't try to escape him that time and he used the new proximity in his advantage to trap you in his strong grip, pushing your body against his.

" In this arms you will find happiness again, if you allow me to show you how good I can do just for you. "

[pinkthrone445]

~Partner in crime~ Part 2

Part 1 Part 3

Pairing:Melissa Schemmenti x Reader

Gender:soft, cute, young Melissa, friends to lovers, slow burn

Warnings:I don't think so

Summary :When they send you to work back in your home town, you start to recall all your memories from your teen years involving the redhead.

-"Soooo..."-the redhead looked at you squinting her eyes to see you better in the middle of the night-"why all your family are assholes? I was able to hear from across the street their screams after you came back from my house... Are you okay?" - she asked and you saw a sincere worry in her eyes. You nodded with your mouth full of the ice cream that she brought to your roof-"I need more than that... I will tell you a secret if you tell me how you truly feel, deal?" - You thought for a minute about what she proposed and nodded again eating more ice cream-"Okey... My secret is, that I actually came here to check if you were okay, no to get away from my siblings to eat that ice cream by myself... If that would have been my true reason, I would have lost because you are eating all of it"-she joked looking how much ice cream you ate and you laughed a little embarrassed

-"They just scream at me because I'm the black sheep of the family I guess... I'm the one that doesn't fit in in their lifes and they make sure I feel that every day. They have their perfect family between her, my dad and their kids and I just don't belong there, I've tried to, but they don't want me here"-You muttered and Mel looked at you with intensity. If there was one thing you hadn't gotten to know in these few hours with her, it was how good she was at reading people, and even though what you said was true, she was able to see that you were hiding a lot of it.

-"Their kids? Those assholes are your dad's kids too?"-she found new information in the way that you were talking

-"Yeah..."-you simply said and she frowned

-"I know we just meet, but you can trust me... Maybe talking will make you feel better" - she put a comforting hand on your knee smiling softly at you, and you could felt the warm through your clothes. You signed and stared at the ice cream that was in your hands. The night was a little bit warm and her hand too, but the cold from the ice cream and the chill breeze gave you a nice contrast on the palms of your hands sending a little chill through your body. All of that, the warm night, the cold breeze, her soft smile, the quiet of the night, the high of the house and her soft voice made you feel at peace and safe, safe enough to trust a almost completely stranger

-"Dad used to be a truck driver, for years he led a double life, he had two houses in different places, two cars, two wives and two families... Mom and I were the spare ones, mom was only his fiancé and my stepmother was married to him long before we appeared on the picture. He had a son with her, after two years, I was born in the other house with my mother, and a year after I was born, he had another son with his wife. My mother was very sick and when we found out that he had another family, she did not have enough strength to resist the news and died. I wanted to stay and live with my grandmother, but she was in a nursing home, and although I offered to take care of her if they let me take her home, the state didn't allowed it because I was a minor... So I had to live with my dad and his other family because my dad's wife forgave him after she found that that my mom died... That's why they hate me, because I'm a living and waking reminder of my dad's affairs"-You said taking a even bigger spoon of ice cream than before. Melissa stared at your face, she didn't know what she was waiting for you to tell her, but it certainly wasn't that.

-"Wow... I'm sorry... I..." - she was trying to find something to say

-"It's okay... I'm about to turn 17, just a few more months after that to turn 18 and I will be able to go live on my own" - You answer finishing the ice cream

-"You can come to my house whenever you need or want, my nana and mom really loved you and they couldn't stop talking about what a nice girl you are" - she said trying to confort you and you smiled softly at her.

After that night, many more moments together came and you could no longer imagine or remember what your life was like without her presence.

You eating at her house became a regular thing and her family treated you as if you were one of them, even when the redhead was not there, they still invited you to dinner or movie night. The weeks began to pass quickly and before you knew it, summer vacation was over and it was time to start at your new school, while you were nervous about that new beginning, knowing that Melissa and some of her siblings would be there calmed your anxiety a bit.

-"Do you have everything ready for tomorrow?" - she asked sitting on your bed eating some chips

-"Yes, I was thinking about using some jeans and a open green shirt over a black muscle, what do you think?" - You asked showing her the hanger with the clothes

-"I think it's really cute... Hey, that green shirt isn't mine? I thought Marie had took it..."-she asked narrowing her eyes to you

-"It's yours, you forgot it that time you stayed here to sleep while my parent were traveling with my brothers, remember? Now it's mine" - You put the clothes back in the closet before she could take it from your hands

-"It's okay... It will probably look better on you than me" - she said and went to your bathroom to wash her hands-"I have to go home to sleep before it gets more late, see you tomorrow?" - The redhead opened your window ready to go outside and climb the tree down. You stared at her, the thought of going to that new school made you more nervous than you wanted to admit

-"Mel?" - she looked at you-"Can you stay tonight with me? I'm too nervous to sleep alone..."-your voice was weak and that broke her heart, she smiled and closed the window

-"Of course, we can't allow you to spend your first day of school without having slept well... Lend me some sleepwear" - she said quickly taking off the things she was wearing.

That night, the redhead wrapped her arms around you, whispering some jokes and sweet things to calm your nerves until you could fall asleep.

Mel and you were only friends, very good ones, or that's what you thought until the next day when school began.

As soon as the day began, Melissa, her siblings and you, all went together while the redhead drove. The day started with a guided tour of the school and some simple classes with repeated introductions mentioning your name, where you came from and the things you liked.

It wasn't until lunchtime that you saw Melissa's siblings again, they invited you to eat with them when they saw you wandering around the yard looking for a place to sit.

While you were eating the limited options offered by the cafeteria and wondering where the redhead was, you saw her enter the lunch court next to a boy, although she was also with other classmates, he was closer to her than everyone else. Apparently your brow furrowed more than usual as Marie immediately began to explain who was he

-"That's Larry... And her other school friends...he likes Melissa and everyone knows it, they don't date because Mel hasn't said yes, but she doesn't say no either, so he keeps wandering around her until the day when she finally say yes... He is a nice guy but a little pusher, he give us chocolate and stuff trying to get our approval and hoping that we will tell nice stuff about him to Mel, hopefully that what we say will help her change her mind quicker, but we only eat the stuff and don't say anything to her"-The younger sister explained eating some stuff of her plate.

Your eyes were fixed on the redhead, barely listening to what her sister was saying. Melissa was a beautiful woman, an amazing body and her always perfect red hair, and in addition to being perfect physically, she had incredible intelligence and was very funny. It wasn't surprising that she had tons of guys behind her... It didn't surprise you, but it did bother you... Why?

You were lost in thought when someone blocked the light coming from the window, when you looked up, the redhead was in front of you and next to her the annoying and insistent Larry. Melissa sat next to you smiling and Larry looked at you hoping that you would move a little so that he could take a place next to the redhead

-"How is your first day going hon?... Can you move a little bit so Larry can sit with us, please?"-she asked pushing you lightly with her hip. She wanted to make room for him on her other side, but you understood that what she wanted was for you to get farther from her so he could sit between you two, and that hurt, you didn't knew why, but it hurt more that it should have and you started to feel a lump in your throat

-"Don't worry, I'm not that hungry anymore to finish what I had, I will use the free time to go around and see the school" - You said getting up from the table and taking your tray of food, leaving your table and seat free for the insistent guy that quickly sat down on your place.

Melissa looked at you in confusion as you left the food hall without looking back.

On the way home you were very quiet and decided to sit in the back seat instead of being her co-pilot as you had been in the morning.

At dusk the redhead came to see you at your house since you were acting very strange since the school day started , but your father told her that you felt a little under the weather and that you had gone to bed without eating. Without giving up, she said goodbye to your father and climbed the tree until she reached your window. After insistent knocks without response, she entered your room since part of the window was open, but she did not find you there, so she decided to climb to the roof. Finding you finally lying on the ceiling, looking up at the sky in silence. Quietly, she sat next to you, looking at your face and discovering how lost and sad your gaze looked

-"Hey kiddo... I brought you some lasagna..." - she looked at you but you didn't looked back at her

-"How did you knew I was here?"-You asked, looking at the starts very lost

-"You always come here when you get sad or need space... What is going on? Someone did something to you at school? Tell me who and I will kill them" - she always said stuff like that, you didn't knew if she was capable of that, but you weren't trying to find out. Sighing you turned to look at her

-"I just miss my mom and nana... That's all... I wish they were here to help me with my head and thouths... It was a weird first day" -you said really low and she frowned

-"I know you miss them... And I know it's not the same, but you are not alone, I'm here to help too, what is going on? What are you feeling?" - she said worried and you sighed again

-"This school is very diferent, everything is different and I feel so out of place... There were so many people and you seemed to have many friends... They seem really interested in you, specially Larry... I mean, I get it, you are really pretty, but he seemed to be invading your personal space a lot... What I'm trying to say is... I... I thought that today we were going to spend more time together, but you seemed really interested in other people and that shocked me a little... You are my safe space and it was hard being away and alone..."-You were talking a little weird, like trying to choose carefully your words. Mel though you had jealousy because she drag attention of other people, she didn't knew it was jealousy because you actually liked her... Or maybe it was jealousy and fear, you weren't so sure about what you were feeling honestly

-"Hey... I won't let you alone because I have other friends, I promise... Also it's okay to have another friends and you will find new ones too, but not matter what, at the end of the day, in this roof, we will always find each other. Okay?.. I promise"-she talked softly trying to help you feel better, but her answers only raised more questions inside you

-"Mel?" - You whispered and she raised her eyebrows paying attention to you- "have you ever been in love?-your question took her by surprise and she took a few minutes to think about it

-"I had a few dates and one boyfriend, but I don't know if that was love, I didn't liked him that much... But mom always says that love comes in many forms, that love makes you feel safe, happy... Sometimes it also hurts and makes you cry. But it makes you feel alive and it's worth living, if it hurts you, you learn and if it makes you happy, it gaves you reasons to live... Why? Do you like someone? Who is it?"-she looked at you really interested

-"I don't know yet... I never felt like this before, sometimes I feel sad and sometimes happy and sometimes my tummy hurts..." - you said looking at her eyes, those where the most beautiful eyes you have seen in your whole life

-"Maybe it's gas" - she joked and you laughed-"That's the smile I missed... Look, I don't know how loves feels or what to do with it, but I will help you with everything I can and I promise to always have food to make your tummy happy again, okay?" - she asked hugging you and you nooded smiling, hiding in her neck, feeling happy and calmer. You didn't knew it yet, but years later you realized that by that time you were already in love with her, but you didn't knew what love was or how it felt, so while you were trying to figure your feelings for her, you decided to stay by her side, having those safe moments on the top of the house eating her delicious food and making each other laugh.

[imsandra]

Red to Gold

Pairing: Eris x female reader

Summary: From the fire of the past are born the flames of a new beginning.

Warning: Mentions of torture, whipping, violence, death (nothing in too much detail), Beron. Let me know if anything happens. Word count: 1183

Notes:The idea came out of nowhere, I hope you like it. Leave your comments on what you think, suggestions, everything is welcome as long as it is with the motivation to teach and with respect.

English is not my native language, so I apologize for any spelling and grammar problems.

Original story, I wrote it myself. Please do not copy or plagiarize my story.

I appreciate the comments, reblogs and likes I receive.

Happy reading!

Master list

The sun would rise again over them.

That was what his mother always said whenever his father did atrocious things to her. His father wasn’t known for being the best; his tyranny was his strength and worth at that time, but it never led him to victory. So when Eris became the new High Lord after killing his own father, his dreams were plagued with nightmares of his past, but he always remembered his mother's words.

“The sun will rise again over us,” the Lady of Autumn would whisper to her children.

“How do you know?” Eris would always ask.

“Because one day, you'll feel that all the bad will go away, and the good will settle deep in your soul, healing the broken parts,” she said as she kissed his forehead.

“Mama, do you feel it?” he whispered. He had always been curious with her, only with her.

His mother took longer than usual to respond. She clung to her little son and answered:

“Yes, I feel it every day,” she finally said.

The little redhead, deep down, knew it was a lie. He knew his father tortured her. She thought that at 8 years old, he wouldn’t be aware of the atrocious things his own father could do. But Eris was always aware, and although he sometimes tried to defend her, which cost him several whippings, he knew his father would never show mercy to a child. So, Eris would have no mercy for him. Never.

When his brothers came into the world, he tried to protect them from Beron's torture, especially his younger brother, Lucien. The only one of his brothers with whom he formed a close bond. The only one he could save from his father's poison.

Lucien and Eris were united by their shared love for their mother. Eris tried to give him a peaceful childhood: he tried to play with him, teach him to read and write, teach him to defend himself. He didn’t care about the consequences that followed. He would do that and more for him and for his mother.

He promised himself: the sun would rise again over them.

A couple of years after becoming the High Lord of the Autumn Court, he found his mate; he found his sun. Y/N was his sun during his dark nights when the storm raged through his body. It was she, with her light, who made him shine like a diamond. His life improved with her, and his mother couldn’t be happier for him, and he couldn’t be happier with her, because he could finally live a free life.

He could never blame her for wanting freedom. Everyone deserved that. Freedom.

Now, while lying on the couch in his home with his little redhead asleep on his chest, he knew his mother was never wrong.

All the bad was going away, and the good was binding to his soul, mending his broken parts.

His little girl stirred on his chest. He gently stroked her back, with tenderness, with love, with the affection that only his mother had taught him, what it meant to be both father and mother at the same time. He swore that the moment his daughter, Emberlyn, was born, he would do whatever it took to give her a childhood full of joy and peace, everything he didn’t have. He would give it to his children.

Emberlyn was his little sun, his passionate little warrior, and even though she was now 5 years old, she was still his little baby. The little redhead claimed to be a little adult, but the fact that she was now lying on her father, her head buried in his neck, showed she was still a baby.

If those thoughts came to light, Emby would get a bit upset and tell her father to have a small sword battle until one of them won. That's why she was his little warrior.

Who would’ve thought his girl was such a fan of swords?

The scent of his mate filled the room; she had entered through the door that connected to the garden. Emby had been helping her mother in the garden they had built together before ending up in her father's arms, fast asleep.

“I love you,” Eris told his wife.

His wife only smiled radiantly before approaching him. When she reached him, she leaned in to kiss him; their lips met gently. A kiss full of so much love, soft as a feather. Both parted, breathless; if it were up to them, they would stay like that for eternity. But they had to breathe at some point.

“I love you more, dear husband,” Y/N whispered near his lips.

Eris made space for her so she could lie down with them. His wife slid onto the couch and nestled into the arm her beloved husband offered her. Y/N rested her head on his shoulder and buried her face in his neck, inhaling his rich scent.

“Maybe we should have another,” Eris said quickly.

“Another what?” the woman responded.

“Another baby,” he said with a smile.

Y/N only laughed and pulled her face out from Eris' neck. She looked at him with a smile; she would never tire of seeing his face, the shape of his nose, his kissable lips, his beautiful freckles adorning his cheeks. Eris locked his gaze with hers, and countless moments flashed through his eyes. He couldn’t believe he was building such a wonderful life as a husband, father, and High Lord of his court.

“I’ll give you all the children you want, my love,” she said with a giggle. She kissed his jaw and buried her face back in her beloved's neck.

The redhead just chuckled, causing his daughter to stir. Emby just wriggled around; she seemed to be a heavy sleeper, just like her mother.

The High Lord of the Autumn Court was more than happy. And though sometimes that happiness was clouded by horrible moments from his past, it was his present that brought him back. His doubts about not being a good father were answered in the moments he shared with his baby. She loved him and reminded him that he was raising her in the best way possible.

He would build that legacy worthy of being told in future generations.

The sun would rise again over them.

*divider by @tsunami-of-tears , thank you.

I red you!

[golbrocklovely]

guardian angel // colby brock

A/N: hey yall, hope you're enjoying my 13 nights so far! this fic was really fun to write and i'm excited to see what you guys think. let me know and happy haunting :)

prompt: you are colby's guardian angel, and have been watching over him his entire life. suddenly you learn that he's going to die, much sooner than you thought. it's against the rules, but you must save him. || colby brock x fem!reader

trigger warning: angst, cursing, colby (almost) dies, heaven is like an office setting lol, time jump, happy ending

word count: 4182

~~~~~~~~~~

Being a guardian angel was no easy feat. Many angels weren’t cut out for the job; too many rules and regulations, too much of a numbers game. But I, Y/N, was born for it.

No literally, God created me to be a guardian angel. And I was the best one around. I had been one for eons, millenniums. I was the top ranking amongst my division. I prided myself on my clean and non-rule breaking record. Being a guardian angel was basically a full time job. Constantly watching over your person, making sure to lead them in the right direction, lend a helping hand when you could… it took up a lot of time. And luckily for humans, angels never needed sleep.

Guardian angels had a very strict job. And if done right, when your person would pass on you were allowed to guide them into the light, let them know how you cared for them, and help them find peace once moved on. It was a job I had become good at. One I had done millions of times.

Then I was tasked with a new human to watch over. His name is Colby Brock.

His early years were pretty uneventful. Most humans' childhoods are. I watched him as he went through all the milestones: his first crush, school, puberty, his angsty phase - that somehow never left - and many other little moments. Everything about his life, and what it was going to be, was written out. Of course humans had free will and the ability to change things, but certain situations were destined.

In particular, his meeting of Sam Golbach.

They were destined to be lifelong friends, business partners, and platonic soulmates. Interestingly however, when they did meet, Colby’s death meter spiked for a moment.

A death meter, as its name sounds, measured the amount of death surrounding a person at any given time. I realized that Sam, while extremely important in Colby’s life, might lead him down certain paths he wouldn’t have taken on his own; which of course could always lead to his early demise.

But I trusted Sam, not only because he was a good person, but because his guardian angel was good at their job as well. Not as good as me, of course...

As time slowly ticked on day by day, year by year, I had this feeling inside of myself. One that I had noticed in many humans but never experienced personally. I for one was an angel, and human emotions weren’t exactly something that came easily to us. But this one… was inherent in everything living.

I had grown to love him. I loved all of my persons that I had cared for over my time as a GA, but he was something different. And the love I felt for him was too.

I watched Colby grow up, struggle. He was hard on himself a lot, internally and externally. I tried my best to send him love in many ways, and sometimes they would help. But it was temporary. There were times I wanted to reach out, to help him more. To maybe even speak directly to him in ways that weren’t allowed.

Guardian angels and humans weren’t meant to speak to one another, unless in the very rare occasion of psychics. But true psychics…. They had once been angels too. That was our punishment for breaking rules: you lost your angel privileges and became human. Depending on how many rules you broke, you would spend multiple cycles being a human, going through the ups and downs over and over again. It was described as a terrible existence in a way, far beyond one of just a normal human. And maybe if you paid your dues you could become an angel again, but there was no guarantee.

I knew my love for Colby was odd in multiple ways. I shouldn’t have felt this for him, this ache in my (what would be) heart, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted to protect him, to make sure he was okay every moment of every day. And it was far beyond what my job required. But I didn’t care.

He had had many scares before, coming a little too close to death for my liking. I would peak into the future in those times, seeing if he would come out the other side. And luckily he always did. He was only 27 years old, and had many years left to live from what I saw.

But then he made the wrong choice.

Sam and Colby were ghost hunters, a first for any human I was a GA for. I watched them go from place to place, the death meter spiking at random. Truly, since this career pivot, my job had become a constant heart attack waiting to happen.

If I could get one of those, of course.

And one day, the death meter went to a high voltage; one that was only reserved for when someone was dying that very day.

I glared, puzzled at the device. Surely this was a mistake. He had years to go, many things to accomplish. There was no way he was dying.

I flipped his book open, reading the words carefully. He was hunting at a random location in Wyoming, a place called the Seesaw Inn. It was old, decrepit, and definitely was a safety hazard.

I read ahead quickly, needing to know what was going to happen, because in the current time, him and Sam were just walking around with the owner, getting a feel for the place. But his story continued on past that point and into the night. On the last page of his book, it spelt out the way he would go: Colby entered the third floor, walking towards room 312. Both boys were told how this room was one of the most haunted, and Colby - losing to a game of rock, paper, scissors - was tasked with going into the room alone and standing out on the balcony to see if he could catch a lady in white appear down below. As he stepped onto the balcony, he noticed how creaky the railing of the balcony was. He shrugged it off, turning his camera on and speaking to it softly. “Guys, I’m out here on Room 312’s balcony. Sam is in the basement, doing a solo onvoy investigation, and I’m supposed to call out to the woman in white. I swear if I see her, I’m shitting myself.” He turned the camera to himself, smiling, and leaned slightly on the railing. It suddenly cracked under the pressure of his weight, Colby letting out a shriek. As he tried to catch his footing, he slipped further and over the railing. Then, he fell, hitting his hea-

I stopped reading, gasping at words. No, no no. This couldn't be happening. There's no way he's dying tonight. How is that even possible? He had a whole life to live! This must have been a mistake.

Vida, Sam's guardian angel, rushed up to me. "Y/N, did you see? Colby's gonna di-"

"Yes I did, Vida. I know." I hushed her, looking around our office quickly, hoping no one noticed.

"I can't believe it. I was looking ahead in Sam's future and saw things change." She sighed deeply, "He's gonna need me now more than ever after this."

"No, he won't," I jumped up from my seat. "Because I'm not gonna let this happen."

"What are you talking about, Y/N? You can't change it. It's set in stone." Vida argued, shaking her head.

I began walking hastily towards the elevators. "Yesterday it wasn't. He was gonna live a whole life! And now, because he plans to lean against some rickety old railing, he dies? Not on my watch."

"You can't just go down there and change things. That's not how we help them." She explained.

I glanced back at her, "There's not enough time for me to change his fate. Unless I physically do so."

"But if you go down there...." Her voice fell softly, "you're done. You won't be allowed back."

"I know. But I can't just let him die. Too many people rely on him. There is so much more harm that will come from his passing." I swallowed hard as my eyes locked onto the elevators, "I can't.... watch him die and do nothing."

"I've never seen you like this, in all my years of being a GA." She murmured.

I took a deep breath, hitting the elevator button down. I turned to her, looking into her eyes deeply, "Just make sure the next GA he gets is nice to him, okay? He really needs us sometimes. So make sure they actually listen to him."

"I will." She nodded her head, leaning in quickly and giving me a tight hug. "Goodbye, Y/N."

"Bye, Vida. It was nice knowing you." I pulled away from her, hearing the doors open.

I entered the elevator, clicking the first floor level. As the elevator descended, I imagined Colby and where he was in this moment. I only had a couple more minutes until his demise. I needed to rush to him, and fast.

Finally the last 'ding' of the elevator clicked. As the doors opened, I looked around my surroundings. It was right outside the Seesaw Inn. I had to get to Colby quickly, so I began flying towards room 312's balcony. I knew he would be there any moment, the clocking ticking down fast.

I stepped over the railing, landing softly onto the balcony. I hid in the corner, right behind where the door would open. A moment passed and Colby came into the room soundly. He mumbled something to himself, walking over to the balcony door and swinging it open.

As he stepped onto the balcony, he glanced at the railing. He shrugged, turning the camera to him and speaking quietly. "Guys, I’m out here on Room 312’s balcony. Sam is in the basement, doing a solo onvoy investigation, and I’m supposed to call out to the woman in white. I swear if I see her, I’m shitting myself.” He turned the camera to himself, smiling, and leaned slightly on the railing. As he began to fall forward, a yell escaping his lips, I grabbed the back of his jacket, holding him back. I yanked him back into the room, knocking him onto the floor.

He shuttered out a cry, gazing up at me in fear, ""W-What the f-fuck?!"

I raised my hands up, "Calm down, Colby. It's alright."

Colby crawled backwards away from me, bumping into the desk nearby. "W-Who are you and how did you get up here? You shouldn't be here."

I stepped into the room but kept my distance from him. I was suddenly overcome with frustration, narrowing my eyes. "Do you know how dangerous that balcony is? You could have died! I mean, you were literally meant to, and all of this over a game of rock-paper-scissors?!"

"Who the hell are you? Did you follow us here?" He stood up quickly, his stance tense.

"You're not gonna believe me when I say this, but I'm your guardian angel. And I just saved your life." I explained plainly.

He paused, his face scrunching, "...My what?"

"Guardian angel. You believe in those, right? At least from what I can tell, you do. So this shouldn't be that much of a shock to you." I half-heartedly laughed.

Colby shook his head, confused. "No... no. You're just some fan that snuck in. You shouldn't be here. You have to leave."

"Do I need to show you my wings to prove to you I'm real?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes, "What? Yeah, sure."

I shrugged, acknowledging his snarky attitude, and fluttered my wings out. The room illuminated with the subtle glow of my wings. Colby stepped back, dropping his camera onto the bed. His eyes were widened in fear and awe.

He kept his eyes on them, "H-Holy... shit."

"I wasn't lying, Colby. I am your guardian angel, and you were supposed to die just then." I stated, slowly folding my wings back up.

He sat down, almost falling onto the bed; the wind being kicked out of him. "There's no way."

"The railing of the balcony is weak, and you were supposed to lean against it, and fall to your death. But I stopped that from happening." I walked over to the railing, Colby's eyes trailing after me curiously. I pushed against the railing, and it broke apart, failing over the balcony. Colby's heart stopped for a moment, his eyes taking everything in.

He swallowed hard, staring at the ground in bewilderment. "Fuck."

"Make sure to sue the person that owns this building for negligence... or something. I'm not entirely sure how human laws work, so just make sure you get some compensation out of your almost death." I remarked, exhaling.

I began to walk towards the door, Colby's voice stopping me. "Wait! Why did you save me?"

I raised an eyebrow at him, "Why?"

"I mean, I figure because you're my... angel, you're supposed to. But why now? Was I not supposed to die?" He questioned, stepping towards me.

"Guardian angels are only supposed to help when you reach out first. Technically what I just did breaks the rule. Actually the biggest rule of them all: don't stop death. We're not supposed to do things like that." I commented, "It kind of fucks with timelines and whatnot."

"But you did it." He breathed.

I nodded. "Yes, I did."

"Why?" Colby whispered.

I took a deep breath, getting close to him slowly. "You are extremely important, Colby. There are so many things left in this world that I know you need to get to. And I don't know why your path changed so quickly, but I knew I had to stop it before it was too late. I couldn't watch you die. I... care about you too much. And so do many others. And I made the executive decision that it wasn't your time to go just yet."

His eyes welled up for a moment, "Thank you. I don't think I'm even remotely ready to die."

"Most aren't. But at least you know now is not your time." I leaned up sweetly, kissing his cheek. "Goodbye Colby."

He held my hand gently, and I felt my being go warm. "Will I ever see you again?"

"Probably not. I'm actually gonna be in huge trouble once I get back upstairs. They'll most like reassign me to someone else," I lied. "So you'll have a new guardian angel. But I'll still check on you from time to time."

He bit his lip. "I don't even know what to say."

"It's okay. There isn't much you can. By the way, the footage on that camera is a no go... can't exactly have people knowing we're around like this." I snapped my fingers, the camera making a bunch of weird clicking noises and then shutting off.

He picked up the camera, looking it over. "Did you delete all of the footage?"

"No. I actually gave you a little present on there so... you're welcome. I guess." I chuckled, walking into the hallway.

I waltzed towards the elevator for the Inn, an up button appear on the panel, glowing a dim white light. I clicked it, waiting for the doors to open.

He cocked his head, squinting his eyes at the doors. "The elevator doesn't work."

It softly 'dinged' and I smirked over at him. "It does for me."

He raced up to the doors, his eyes locking with mine. "I never caught your name."

My breath hitched, tears brimming at my eyes. I shouldn't feel sadness, but in this moment I did. Because I knew once I left him, I would never see him again. I turned my head to him, smiling as brightly as I could. "Y/N. My name is Y/N."

He smiled back. "Goodbye, Y/N."

"Goodbye Colby." I choked back a cry, "I love you."

~~~~

20 Years Later

Most angels, when turned into humans, lose all of their memories when it comes to their past lives. Especially guardian angels. We aren't meant to remember a thing about what we once were.

I was somehow blessed, or cursed, with remembering it all.

After being berated by management, I was turned into a human. I lived a relatively normal life, full of the usual heartache and suffering. And over time I became less of an angel and more human as the years went on.

Luckily for me, they didn't make me start out as a baby. I came down to Earth as a freshly new adult. I was now 34, working part time retail and part time in a bar in downtown Los Angeles.

So I was, essentially, sent to hell in at least one way.

I originally kept tabs on Colby, but slowly as time went on I stopped. It was hard to constantly watch him from the sidelines enjoy his life, even though that's what I used to do. I did check on him every so often, seeing how life was treating him. And he seemed fine; happy, even. And that's all I had wanted for him. I never went searching for him. I didn't think it was smart for me to do so. It all hurt too much that he was so close yet so far away at the same time.

But God always finds the sense of humor in things.

I wiped down the counter of the bar, getting rid of the droplets of alcohol left behind from the previous drink I made. Today had been slow, a regular Tuesday night. Things would start picking up some once it got later, but as of 10 pm, it made sense for it to be dead in the bar.

I heard the door to the bar cling open, a man walking towards the bar confidently. I barely registered him, stepping over to the touch screen to enter his order.

"Hi, what can I get for you?" I asked.

"Just a beer. Corona." The man's deep voice stated.

"Sounds like a good choice." I looked up at him, my eyes widening once I finally took him in. I could spot that face from anywhere. "Colby?"

He smiled meekly, giving a soft laugh. "God, I haven't gone by that in a while."

"Holy shit..." I studied his face; he looked oddly the same, just a bit older. Wrinkles and lines had etched itself kindly into his features, his hair no longer the emo cut he once had, but now pushed back. He had some facial hair, a mustache and goatee, that appeared to be lightly graying. He still dressed like he used to, all black.

"Do I know you from somewhere? Or are you a fan... of me?" He questioned hesitantly, handing me his card to pay for his drink.

"Um, yeah. You could say that." I choked out a laugh, swiping his card. "I used to watch you and Sam all the time back in the youtube days. But I haven't paid attention to you in a while, if I am honest."

"I'm not that interesting, so you didn't miss out on much," he smirked. "But I'm surprised. You look so young, I would have thought you knew me for my music."

"I did listen to your first album. It was a banger." I grinned.

His dimples appeared as he smiled back. "Thank you, thank you. I appreciate that."

I grabbed his Corona from the fridge, popping it open and handing it to him. "What made you stop doing youtube videos? If you don't mind me asking."

He sat down at the bar, cupping the bottle and taking a swig. "Well, me and Sam had a very close encounter with death. So much so, I was a bit freaked out with making content like that anymore. But then we saw the footage we caught, a full on apportion, and we stuck around a bit longer after that. We were all over the news, as proof of actual paranormal, which was actually crazy. But slowly over time, even though we were super successful, it became a bit too much for me. Plus, I wanted to settle down, meet someone. Have a family. And Sam felt the same after a while too. So we just... slowly stopped. Went our own ways."

I leaned towards him, "Are you guys still friends?"

He snickered, "Oh yeah. He literally lives next door to me. We get together every other weekend, or whenever we can, and just hang out in my backyard. Watch the kiddos play."

My jaw dropped at his words, "You have kids?"

"Two. Sam's got three, funny enough. My oldest is about to go into fourth grade. My youngest is in kindergarten." He took another sip, smiling. "It's fucking nuts how time flies."

"That's amazing. I know about the music, but didn't you also do some modeling after youtube as well?" I queried.

"Oh yeah, my very short lived modeling career," he mumbled bashfully. "Personally, while it was fun, I got a lot more of an enjoyment out of music."

I nodded, "What does Sam do now?"

"Well, after youtube, he spent a year traveling. Finding himself. Wrote a book about it, wrote another one the following year. Did a Ted Talk that went viral," he laughed. "Then he went on to do behind the scenes stuff, and now he runs his own management company for celebrities."

I raised an eyebrow, "And then found his wife somewhere in all of that?"

"Yep. Same as me." He closed his eyes, thinking, "I was touring, in the middle of my press run for my album, and I met my wife at a party and I just knew she was the one I wanted to be with forever."

My heart fluttered at his words, "That's really sweet. I'm so glad you got to do all of that."

"Yeah..." His voice trailed off, his eyes fixating on the bar. "At one point in time, I didn't think I would."

I replied, "Because of the close encounter?"

He nodded, picking at the label of his beer.

"What happened that night?" I pressed, lowering my voice.

"Well, um... do you want the story we told or the real one?" He questioned, his eyes growing cold.

"Both, if you're up for it." I challenged.

He sighed, "The story we gave is that I went out on the balcony, caught the woman in white, and almost fell off the balcony because of the railing being shit."

"And that's not what happened?" I questioned, already knowing the answer.

"No. I... was saved." He whispered, "By my guardian angel. And then she left, and I never saw her again."

"Did you want to see her again?" I asked, gazing into his eyes.

"Every night I prayed that she would reappear to me. But she never did. Sometimes I think I went crazy that night." He chuckled, "God knows Sam still to this day doesn't full believe me when I tell him what happened."

I breathed, "The railing was really shitty though. Even an ounce of weight would have cracked it."

"Exactly, exact-" He paused, looking up at me puzzled, "Wait how would you know?"

My voice trembled, "Because... I was there that night, Colby."

He shook his head, laughing bitterly. "No, you're not. You're not her."

"Yes I am, Colby. I'm not lying to you." I rebutted, walking around the bar to him.

He stood up, looking me over. "Right, then what's your name?"

"Y/N. My name is Y/N." I answered.

Colby's breath hitched in his throat, his eyes watering instantly. He whispered, "There's no way."

"I was there that night, Colby. I'm the one that saved you." I swallowed hard, holding back tears. "I'm sorry it took me twenty years to see you again."

"Y/N? Is it really you?" He came up to me, his eyes really taking me in, "You look so... human."

"I am," I laughed. "My punishment for breaking the rules."

He scrunched his face, "You told me you would get reassigned."

"I lied. I didn't want you to feel guilty for my decision." I admitted.

"Who watches over me now?" He questioned.

"Someone good, apparently. Since your life has been working out pretty well for you," I smirked. "I made sure that Vida would care to that."

He raised an eyebrow, "Vida?"

"Sam's guardian angel." I mentioned.

Colby grew quiet for a moment, just staring at me. I could feel my face warm as his stare intensified.

His chest heaved, a kind smile growing on his face. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too." My eyes welled with tears as I embraced him tightly, his arms wrapping around me instantly. We stood for a moment, just holding one another.

He pulled back, his eyes bright. "Sam's gonna owe me so much money now."

I laughed, Colby joining in cheekily.

[pinkyqil]

Struggles | a.Putellas x j.Hermoso

Hidden secrets series

Hidden secrets Masterlist

Warning: mention of pregnancy,

Four months into her pregnancy alexia whole body and perceptive had changed she thought that she could handle the changes that her body made.

but that came with a lot of over thinking and stressing about what could happen to her career.

Alexia knew not to be into her head that much but with everyone and everything spectating about her injured leg her mind couldn't focus on anything but that.

She tried her best to not focus on the negativity from the media but sometimes she just couldn't escape her own mind. she hated how the media started getting into her head.

Has it ever happened before ? Yes. but it had never gone way too far where she thought that she wasn't good enough.

if anything she was one of a kind but now she felt like a nobody.

alexia couldn't bother jenni with all of this, having the love of her life thinking she was pathetic would hurt way more than any other online comments about her.

Plus they've been redoing alexia whole places trying to make it accommodate with her needs and along with setting up the baby's room.

the only time she found comfort apart from jenni would be when she found herself spending time in her unborn child's room just the little things they've done in there gave alexia a bit of peace.

Currently resting in the rocking chair that had been placed in the room. Alexia had her head heavy in the clouds of thoughts.

were she hadn't heard jenni footstep especially when she called out her name.

Jenni on the contrary had rapidly noticed the swift changes in alexia behaviors.

She noticed it after alexia came back from her appointments and where they had barely spoken.

Normally the blond haired woman would have let her know anything that happened throughout the whole thing but on that day she barely spoke a word the moment she step foot into the house and just headed down to bed ignoring her.

So today when she found her sitting alone, she would make her talk cause she hated how the past few days had been for both of them.

After tapping alexia shoulder for what felt like forever getting the other woman's attention since she wasn't aware of her surroundings.

"Ale is everything alright?.

"mhm everything is ok".

jenni felt the emptiness from her voice she wanted to know what was going on but at the same time didn't want to stress out her beloved.

She would now find herself caressing her cheeks pulling her closer forming a hug between them.jenni could feel alexia tense body relaxed in her arms now.

"Wanna talk about it now".

Alexia slowly nodded her head finally deciding that she couldn't hold her struggles in anymore and needed someone.

Taking a deep breath before she stated speaking.

"I don't know jenni everything just feels frustrating not being able to do stuff on my own always needing help or assistance especially way more now I don't even feel like myself anymore"

Jenni felt herself pulling alexia into another hug as she couldn't utter a single word to comfort the woman right in front who was struggling.

she now made it a mission to make her feel better without making it seem like a chorus taking care of her.

Reminding her how talented and amazing she was cause no matter what she'll always be.

The Alexia putellas who doesn't let any obstacles get in her way.

Promising her that she'll always be by her side no matter what

Alexia obviously noticed jenni's effort in making her feel better but something in her heart felt a little empty that she couldn't explain but alexia wouldn't let it get to her head and just enjoy the moments.

Her heart truly belongs to jenni she thought thinking that her happily ever after would forever last.

A/n: hope y'all enjoy this chapter ik I promised longer chapters but I just can't seem to make it work but the other chaps coming would definitely make up for it. and has always ask ideas or any tips you have for me are always appreciated