#i care more about this than anything else rn tbh 😭😭😭

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Made some edits of this panel from the volume 25 omake by itself, because it's so precious that my heart needed it on its own and to forget about everything else. Couldn't decide on what color to make it so I just did multiple :') Use them as lockscreens or whatever if you wish~ 💖

[isadollie]

hi anne! i wanted to request boyfie x fem!reader headcanons for daichi and kuroo from haikyuu?

btw loved your recent bokuto hubby drabble 🥺 you've really blessed us 🥺 i wanted to include bokuto for the ask but you wrote him so well in that drabble! 🤧 you can still include him in this request if you'd like 👀 might be fun hehe 🤭

thank you! 🤍🤍

boyfriend! daichi, kuroo, bokuto headcanons (separate)

★ hello anon! tysm for requesting<3

★ and omgg, i'm so happy you liked my little bokuto drabble! 🥹🥹 i included him in the headcanons here as well cause it's never too much bokuto am i right or am i right

♡ DAICHI SAWAMURA

★ super protective like omg

★ i feel like he loves to hold hands at all times

★ the sidewalk rule.

★ is veryy serious about your relationship

★ already plans your future together and loves to talk about it

★ always asks for your opinion though

★ "my love, when we get married, do you want to get a cat? a dog? maybe a hamster?"

★ can be a bit too serious sometimes tbh

★ like, when you guys are out with friends, sometimes you have to nugde him and be like "that person was joking btw" cause he just doesn't get itttt

★ that type of man that your family would love

★ might get late to the meeting with your family and then enter with a cute smile and be like "i'm so sorry, i met an elder lady on my way and i had to help her with grocery shopping"

★ he's that type to read every single book you said you liked, and watch all your favorite movies

★ always insists to pay for everything

★ acts of service allll the way

★ will stop in the middle of your walk to kneel down and tie your shoe

★ loves to show you off in front of his teammates

★ ALSO OMG imagine you two go shopping cause you wanted to get some new makeup supplies

★ he'll carry your cart and when you want to see how would a lipstick, eyeshadow or anything else look on skin, he offers you his hand so you can try out all the shades on him hehe

★ and then when you two walk out of the store both of his hands are covered in blush, lipsticks and other stuff but he doesn't care tbh

★ (now i kinda want to write a drabble abt it)

★ (let me know if i should)

♡ KUROO TETSURO

★ would probably do anything you asked of him tbh

★ he's that type of boyfriend to also be your bestie ykwim

★ "they broke up?? no way! give me all the details rn"

★ skincare routine is his favourite activity with you, he's just so glad you got him into that

★ then he goes to practice and talks to his teammates like "don't you guys see how i'm GLOWING??"

★ pretty random but i hc that he can fall asleep literally anywhere and that he loves naps

★ kinda... like a cat...

★ and oh he SNORES

★ loves to tease you sm

★ especially abt your height, let's be honest

★ asks how's the weather down there and thinks he's funny

★ i feel like he really cares about kenma's approval of your relationship

★ introducing u to kenma was more important for him than introducing you to his family atp 💀

★ so stressed abt it too it's honestly funny

★ but kenma said you seem cool so kuroo can already go look for a ring

★ sends you reels of cats cuddling and says "us"

★ loves to carry you and always looks for an excuse to do so

★ would switch his shoes with yours when your legs start to hurt

★ looks good in your heels and i'm telling you, he walks in them better than u do

★ just smirks and says that he can teach you to be better lol

♡ BOKUTO KOTARO

★ lowkey an introvert's nightmare

★ probably took ages to confess tho

★ cause he's just too afraid to mess up, and he doesn't want to ruin your friendship:(

★ asked akaashi to help confess

★ also, asks akaashi with help with ANYTHING

★ like in my head, bokuto doesn't really have any previous relationship experience

★ so he doesn't really know what to do sometimes and you're very important to him so he wants to do everything right

★ therefore he asks akaashi for help. all the time. all. the. time.

★ like let my man akaashi rest 😭

★ asks him what to get you for your birthday, how to apologize after a fight, anything you can think of tbh

★ so clingy, the definition of clingy actually

★ wants to hang out 24/7

★ if you asked him to move in with you on the very same day you two started dating, he'd agree without hesitation

★ also texts you whenever you can't meet up

★ sends the most random shit, especially on tiktok and ig

★ he's that type to, when he plays a match, before he makes a serve, points at you and is like "this one's for you" and then completely misses

★ will talk your ear off

★ says the cutest things when he's sleepy

★ he'll just cuddle up to you and start rambling abt how much he loves you

[cedarbranch]

nine people i'd like to get to know better

tagged by @sunriseverse! thank you for tagging me bc if anybody else had tagged me first i probably would have ended up tagging you :D

three ships: hannigram, gerrymichael/doorkeay, newmann

first ship: really depends on how you define it but in terms of the first ship i ever consumed fan content for... oh god im trying to remember. it was something from black butler. probably grell/sebastian?? i truly don't recall but like it was nothing GOOD

last song i listened to: haven't listened to anything today but the last song i played in the car last night while driving home from seeing the eclipse was pull it from my teeth by galaxy family! when i inevitably use a line from that song as a fic title... ya saw it here first

currently reading: all the light we cannot see by anthony doerr but i haven't picked it up in ages, it really hasn't hooked me yet... i'm finally reading it after hearing it hyped for yearssss and i have a whole Thing about not DNFing books but tbh i'm wondering if i could be having more fun reading smth else 😭

currently watching: hah. ahahahh. a fourth back-to-back nbc hannibal rewatch? surely i wouldn't do such a thing.... (narrator voice: they would and they are. enthusiastically. they're also watching dungeon meshi as it comes out!)

relationship status: the love of my life is being sooo nice to me while i scream and cry trying to navigate the housing market to find an apartment for us :))

current obsessions: i think my response to "currently watching" makes this question redundant. like. i'm gonna trust the audience on this one ❤️

currently craving: i have eaten four mini cupcakes this evening and yet i crave a fifth mini cupcake...

fave color: rn it's burgundy/cherry red! :)

tagging a mix of friends and assorted mutuals: @melandrops @cavalierprimary @fruitxbat @w0rms-w0rms-w0rms @shark-myths @thatneoncrisis @zipegs @awondrousway @figbian @stoplightglow that's more than 9 but i don't care. anyone who wishes can join the silly little tag game we are all frolicking and making merry together <3 if you don't know who tf i am i'm probably in your notifs as @cathedralbells!

[iheartchv]

Hey I was hoping I could get a cod matchup? Sorry in advance for the yapping

Umm as for appearance I am 5’4” in my early twenties. I have layered curly brown hair that comes to just above my shoulder, blue eyes, freckles pale as hell, a few scars here and there that I’m kinda proud of (from various causes) I don’t really have a specific style it can range from a tank top and sweats to t-shirt and jeans or something completely wild, color coded decked out in jewelry, skirts, layers the whole bit. Relatively active build, used to be a gymnast until an injury now I just workout twice a week w a friend. Interests; I like movies top five rn probably Scream (1996), Spiderverse, 10 things I hate about you, the last unicorn, Dead poets society, +Star Wars cause I can’t leave it out. I like playing chess every now and then, I’d say I’m pretty good but I still have a ways to go. I’m also an artist, and I like music I can’t do anything music related I just like listening to it, all kinds. I like baking when I’m stressed, typically cookies during finals week at 2 am. My future prospects, or at least what they are currently, is just going to law school, after that I’m not really sure, I’ve thought ab going the military route, both of my parents served/are serving, so I’ve thought ab the possibility of being a military JAG or something in Intel, but I’m still feeling for it, I mostly like law cause I’m pretty good at it and I like knowing more than people. I’m Bi so my taste in Men/Women varies. As much as I’d like to say I don’t have a type, hot people are hot, there have been patterns in the past few fictional guys. Tbh my taste in men is shit, like I don’t have daddy issues, I have a great relationship with him, but my past fictional crushes say other wise. But basically, capability is HOT, if they’re good at something to the point of mastering it I’m entranced. Women are just pretty, there’s not much there. I’m relatively paranoid, even describing myself like this online is strange, I think it’s just growing up around military but I’m typically just cautious. That and trust issues. I’ve done some martial arts/self defense and I think sparring is really fun I just need someone to teach me. Also I am a huge simp (with shit taste as my friends say) I’m an ambiavert, so I like to be pretty adaptable depending on who I’m around. I’m also German/American but definitely more American than anything else, I ‘grew up’ in south Germany and we still have family there but since we moved here I’ve forgotten most of  the language. JFC in hindsight I am SO SORRY about all this I got carried away. I hope it didn’t come across as self absorbed 😭😅 thanks 

Sorry again 

🤔 I'll pair you with...

Captain John Price 🚬

Price might be the one to fall for you

If you ever decide/decided to join the military, him and Laswell will look through files and find you

He can't help but feel that you would bring something to the table

Recruiting you, along with many others, he'd be watching you

Through the tests, he'd be silently hoping you'd pass

When he asks to see you, you think you've done something wrong

Instead he just tells you that you've done a good job with all the training and tests he's put you through

"I admit, I thought you would call it quits anytime soon... but... you're determination surprised me."

"You've got guts, spirit. I like that"

He wants to take you under his wing and train you

He was right about you; there was something special there

Though he didn't know just how special you would be to him later on 🤭

After many months and near death experiences later, he'd come to realize he cares about you... a lot

💞

When off duty, he will take you somewhere to talk

Price doesn't play games, you know that

So... he tells you that he really likes you

All this time he'd spent getting to know you, he felt something he hadn't in a long time

One time, when he looked like he was about to fall asleep he was surprised that you showed so much concern for him; You wanted to do something, anything, for him

His hand gently held yours, showing how gentle he can be

"If you'll have me, love, I can make you happy... even if it takes my whole life to"

[ashipiko]

Ashiii I hope you don't mind me askin a question about twst ashi!

I know the people she's close to are in her profile, like epel, floyd, leona, but exactly how do they act around her and vice versa? And are there any other characters? I'm very curious!! (also i'm working on something rn)

Take your time to answer if you need!! And you don't need to go through every character, just the ones that seem the most important/significant to you :D

HI TARURU!!!!!! 🤔 tbh this question isn’t really that hard to answer so I’ll go in depth about leona/epel? floyd used to be listed as a close relation but EHHH. tho I HAVE written little things for every single chara so that’ll be under the cut!!! (wrote it on discord so the like? rhythm behind the words might be weird cuz I cut them out www) 👁️👁️ TY for the interesting ask tho. hope you have fun w whatever you do!!!!

EPEL: yo the besties EVERRRRR!!!! their dynamic is countryboy that knows how to do so many things and princess who knows how to do so many things BUT neither of them know what the other does. THEY LEARN A NEW SKILL LIKE EVERY DAY THEYRE SO FUNNY. epel acts like his yeehaw self around ashi cuz they’re really close and he loves to catch a break wherever he can 🙏 ashi is more feisty and speaks her mind w/o worry (most of the time) w epel because there’s just a certain level of trust between them?? like you can speak your mind and really form a true connection. ashi who was never really close to anyone and epel who never really had friends his age growing up…… WWW I CRY. like imagine two elementary school students who are best friends. THEM.

LEONA: leona is his usual grumpy self and he doesn’t say it BUT he cares for ashi a lot. he’s not really a word person but more so an action type of guy? he’ll do things that’ll make her go “AWWWWWW” and stuff 🫶 ashi gets to be PEAK annoying and AGAIN doesn’t really worry about keeping up a front because she feels comfortable w leona. she’s the youngest at home after all!!! seems like they wouldn’t vibe at all but you’ll find em hanging out at the botanical garden together

OKKK EVERYONE ELSE IS UNDER THE CUT

—HEARTSLABYUL

RIDDLE: they’re pretty chills…… riddle likes ashi because she abides to the rules of heartslabyul (that she knows of) even if she’s not even a member of Heartslabyul herself <3 tho he does not understand what goes thru her head sometimes. “this slang is worse than cater sometimes and ACE??? ASHI YOU DESERVE BETTER YOURE TOO NICE FOR A RULEBREAKER LIKE HIM” vibes

ACE: do I need to even need to explain. I wrote 6K words about them and won’t shut up

DEUCE: THEY VIBE!!! NGL i do think that ashideuce have like sliiight similarities if you peek but deuce is more open and genuine than her 🤔 they’re very cute and I think Ashi wingmanning him could be cute <3 Ashi thinks he’s silly

CATER: people compare her to him sometimes and she’s like “……IMIG?” they would get along really well on paper but in reality they don’t interact all that often….. nothing special but I think they both know that they’ve got smth going on that’s not entirely the same

TREY: uhhhhh. TRULY JUST ACQUAINTANCES FRS <3 like he’ll ask her if she wants anything because she’s prefect and also cuz she’s like a regular at unbirthday parties but that’s bout it 😔

—SAVANACLAW

LEONA: accidental adoption at its finest. leona and ashi both have that bougie background even tho Ashi isn’t an ACTUAL princess so “out of pity” leona treats her ��� they have fun talks and ashi likes to draw w leona when she needs a break from ace or if he’s busy 🫶🫶 v chill……. leona could see right thru her act I think so he also likes to tease her and stuff. THEYRE FUN. i think they styled eachother’s hair to look like eachother once

RUGGIE: 😔 the person leona sends to do the dirty work to get food for Ashi…… they’re chill and they like to catch up!!!! ruggie tried to finesse her once and it almost worked 😭😭they talk sometimes when they both end up at Monstro lounge <3 homies!!! RUGGIE KINDA LEARNS TO ACCEPT HER AS A LITTLE SISTER TOO I THINK

JACK: truly just acquaintances pt 2 😔 it’s really hard to keep a convo going w these two and the only thing they’ve got in common is tsunderes. THE TYPE OF FRIENDS TO BE FRIENDS IN A GROUP but not 1 on 1

—OCTAVINELLE

AZUL: she wants to punch him SO BAD. twstshi acts nice w him cuz he’s her boss and she’s very chill but she SWEARS everytime he opens his mouth she wants to sock him across the face. azul thinks they are great business partners HE MEANS FRIENDS. MAYBE

FLOYD: FLOYD LOOOVES ASHI he thinks she’s SO fun to rile up. will squeeze her very hard if he spots her at basketball matches and if crabby doesn’t point out that she can’t breathe 🫶 ashi likes him but she still finds him VERY scary. unreliable coworker 😔 tho I think wayy later on when Ashi feels more vulnerable their mood swings would be veeeeery uh. ruh oh

JADE: HORRIFYING GET HIM OUT. WHY IS HE LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT. STOP SMILING AT ME. GET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

—SCARABIA

KALIM: they’re SO CUTE. ashi’s a foodie and so kalim invites her over to Scarabia a lot <3 slowly he helps her build up a spice tolerance…… slowly……….. both kinda naive but ashi’s more cautious than him I think

JAMIL: very skeptical of one another. vvvvvv sussy but ashi likes his food so. it’s okie <3

—POMEFIORE

VIL: ADMIRES HIM SM vil’s very neato and espec after book 5 Ashi can’t even be MAD at vil’s overblot because she’s like damn fam 😔 i lowkey getchu. it’s okie <3 and she holds absolutely NO GRUDGE against him. there’s like nothing bad about him she can pinpoint and she thinks he’s really hypesies

ROOK: kinda scary but he’s fun so it works out 🫶🫶 rook is the type to joke and tease Ashi and make her laugh I think but give these one off lines and she’s like “???? WHAT’S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN.” they’re funsies

EPEL: BESTIES WHO LOOK SO CUTE BUT WOULD KICK YOU IN THE NUTS IF THEY COULD. ashi loves hearing about everything epel and is SO invested in his hometown. she also loves all the apple cider he brings over and thinks it’s SOOOOOOOO good 🙏 ashi’s walls naturally come down w epel and TBH he doesn’t really notice or make a big deal about it? so they act very cute and proper w others but you might catch these two on the roof of NRC one day

—IGNIHYDE

IDIA: ashi hates him so much. so many reasons and she wishes she could curse him with rabies.

ORTHO: thinks he is insane and was fine w him until he threatened to blow up the entirety of NRC and now she thinks that he’s terrifying but she can’t mess w him MORE SO THAN IDIA because 😔 child

—DIASOMNIA

MALLEUS: very scary. she gets so scared and yelps everytime she sees him. she’s like constantly shaking when she talks to him and malleus is like teehee <3 gargoyle

LILIA: KINDA FREAKY WHERE DOES HE COME FROM. lilia think she’s very fun and he likes to talk to her!! tho she cannot eat his food. holy moly my guy like WHAT

SILVER: ashi’s just awed by his existence NGL like damn fam. how are you just like perfection 😭😭 she doesn’t talk to him much tho. like that person you look at and think about but don’t talk to <3 silver thinks she is a very nice girl

SEBEK: one sided affection and ashi is very “😨 huh. stop yelling at me” 😔 she wouldn’t punch him but she will give him the silent treatment cuz she’s so annoyed <33 she laughs everytime Ace disses him

GRIM: IFS LIKE. WEIRD because I don’t think Ashi is ALWAYS putting on her front w him because they’re together literally 24/7 but they care for eachother a lot 😔😔 like Ashi will be moody w Grim but gives him discipline like a dog WITH JUSTIFIED REASONS so he can’t really get mad at her…… even if she is moody she still seems cheery so like. weird middle ground. Ashi still plays it safe but he still gets a good look at a wider range of emotions w her

[purgetrooperfox]

yeehaw ask game moment 🌀🌤️❄️

[wip ask game]

YEEHAW

🌀Post the fic summary for a fic you haven't written/published yet. It can be hypothetical or something you really plan on releasing...

not a summary I'd actually put on the fic itself but I'm working on one that's centered around Gale getting snatched by Orin. Astarion's pov, bloodweave undertones (and overtones. tones in general tbh) of the Astarion-can-no-longer-deny-how-much-he-cares variety, Gale whump, headbutting trauma, aftermath hurt/comfort, all that good stuff. I'm insane about it and I really hope I can get it cleaned up enough to post 😭

❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.

At times, typically in the night, after most of the camp has retired, his mask drops and Astarion is gifted with a look at the man behind the illusion. When he isn't rambling on about theories of magic or regaling their merry band with tales of Waterdeep, or his beloved tressym, or his allegedly wild youth, Gale watches. His gaze is sharp, analytical, like it seeks to see through his companions' armor and down to their squishy underbellies. He wants to know what makes them tick, what makes them laugh, what earns their approval, what pulls them in or pushes them away. 

Like recognizes like, and Astarion recognizes Gale. He knows the look of someone hiding, afraid of being found out. Of a secret that could change everything. He knows the look of someone working tirelessly to become needed. Indispensable. A thing to protect. 

But above all, more intimately than he knows anything else, Astarion knows hunger. Alone at the fire, clutching his elbows, gaze trained on their darling leader's tent, Gale is a man starving. 

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

(realizing rn that I have all these bg3 drafts but very little dialog, which is Not like me lmaoooo star war it is. will put this under a break so post isn't stupid long)

"Echo," Nocte cuts him off, finally redirecting his attention from his screen to Echo's face. "Can it wait? I'm almost off shift, I'm sure someone else–"

"I wanted to request access to Fives' autopsy report," he blurts all at once in a jumbled rush.

And Nocte stares at him, face unreadable, for a moment that seems to stretch out long between them. His expression doesn't so much as twitch and the drumming of his fingers freezes. “Why?”

“He was my brother."

“I'm your brother. Why?”

He carefully doesn't purse lips. “He was my brother and he died.”

“We're at war,” Nocte's voice is sharp, almost a warning, “and he was a soldier.”

Why?

It's more resistance than Echo expected, two appeals more than he thought would be necessary. While Nocte has a reputation for many things – questionable bedside manner, gruff demeanor, variable patience – callousness isn't one of them. The family card should have worked. “Haven't you lost anyone you cared about in all this?”

Barely there, his expression tightens. “Watch yourself, lieutenant.”

“I thought you'd understand,” Echo snaps before he can stop himself. “I thought–”

“Echo.” He doesn't raise his voice because he doesn't have to. “Stop, before you say something you'll regret, and tell me why.”

[beansterpie]

B, D, J, L, T, U

Thanks for the ask moth!! <3

B - A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

LMFAO Agohiru from ES21 😂 I remember when I first got into es21 back in highschool, Hiruma was my fav, but I didn't think much of Agon other than 'wow what an asshole!' and didn't like him. (Also I was a big Hirumamo shipper at the time, and I'm the type who clings onto One Ship for a character and isn't too interested in anything else lol) It wasn't until I got back into it in the last couple of years that I've come to appreciate how much fun it is to bat that asshole around, and just how loaded Hiruma and Agon's ~history~ is.

Though I guess no one person specifically changed my mind, unless you count past me vs present me lol. OH actually, what changed my mind was the fic "Independent Variable" on ff.net. I think I got back into es21 and was like 'you know, hiruma/agon totally has potential' and so was looking up fics of that pairing, and then I read that fic and was lost.

D - A pairing you wish you liked but just can’t.

Hmmmm oh, Merther (Merlin/Arthur) lol. Their set up as a ship is extremely juicy (two sides of the same coin?? fate ties them together??? conflict because their initial world views are diametrically opposed????) and there's soooo much fic for them, but. I just. I don't like Arthur 😭 Like, I mean, he's FINE. But the writing of the whole show is so inconsistent and there's entire seasons where he's just so shitty to Merlin for no damn reason in a way that I'm supposed to take as funny and silly which pisses me off more.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t think about until you saw it all over Tumblr. (You don’t have to care about it or follow it; it just has to be something that Tumblr made you aware of.)

I mean, most shows that have mainstream popularity that I never checked out lol, though I think one that I've seen a lot of shipping art for on my dash is Star Wars? I've seen the main movies, but I think this is from.... Clone Wars, or the Obi-wan show or something. I see a lot of Obi-wan shipped with... one of the clone guys I think lmfao.

L - Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves.

Hmmmm this isn't even a character I dislike, but whatever-- Judeau! I like him a lot tbh but I also find him shady 😂

I like how his 'friend who gives good advice and just has your best interests at heart' vibe is subverted by his personal biases and emotions, even if he'd probably deny that lol. He's flawed and it colors the advice he gives, and he even has moments that I'd argue are kind of judgy. It's what makes him interesting!

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending? 

Yes! Main one coming to mind rn because I've been thinking about Hiruma (ES21) a lot, is that Hiruma is on the ace spectrum! I'm usually pretty take-it-or-leave-it when it comes to sexuality headcanons, like I can buy most interpretations but I generally don't feel strongly about them, but with Hiruma I really struggle to see him as anything else.

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

OOHHHH. Well in Berserk, it's legit a tie between Guts and Griffith. I wouldn't like either one of them as much without the other in their orbit, and Berserk is one of those rare stories where both characters are really complex and compelling in their own way, and bring a lot of significant baggage into their dynamic lmfao. With Guts I love how sensitive he is, and the various ways in which he subverts and deconstructs the Macho Male Power Fantasy™ archetype, how at the end of the day he just wants someone to care about him and find worth in his existence. With Griffith, I love his ideals and his fragility in the face of the sacrifices those ideals demand from him, I love how much he cares and how much he gouges himself for caring, and how all of his stress and guilt and obligation still aren't any match for his love for Guts. And with both of them, I love how their upbringing informs their decisions so well to ruin everything even though they care about each other so much :')

w/ ES21, it's Hiruma lol which might be basic because he's everyone's fav, but for good reason! He's just fucking fun! I love how unhinged and demonic he is, I love the borderline slapstick loony-tunes tyle antics he gets up to, and I love his shamelessness. But I also love how accepting and realistic he is about his limitations, and how that doesn't stop him from striving for the top and going for what he wants. And like, for such an anime-level strategic genius type character, I love that such a core part of what makes him great is that he brings people together and uses teamwork and creativity to overcome everyone's various limitations. He's just-- so much fun!

And because this list is depressingly male lemme throw in a wild card-- Chase from Midnight Furies! It's a webcomic that I recently read for the first time, and Chase is the deuteragonist and a Hiruma expy lol. Which you can definitely tell, they both have the unhinged vibe and shark teeth, as well as the mysterious past and having a lot of cards up their sleeve, but I also think they're quite distinct. Obviously, Chase is a butch lesbian (which really does just add to her cool factor), but also I feel like Midnight Furies is a more grounded story compared to ES21, despite there being supernatural elements lol, and so Chase feels more grounded and realistic as a character. She's a bit more raw in her relationships to other people, and she shows vulnerability more, but she's also much more of a direct physical threat than Hiruma is. Because of that, she has moments where calculation gets thrown out the window in favor of a good ol' beat down, which of COURSE I love to see. And I think she has the capacity to be more ruthless. ANYWAY, awesome character, A+++ (please read Midnight Furies)

[alphabet ask meme]

[ancientgreekyuri]

💕 + i love nerine lore plz infodump :)

I've changed some things about her lore recently so I'd love to talk about her tbh... 😭

3000 years ago, AZ's younger brother (unnamed in game, but I call him Xanthos) hired Nerine as a scribe. This was an unusual action, as they lived during a time where writing was mainly used for bookkeeping purposes...

But Xanthos was deeply concerned about legacy. And what better way to ensure that legacy is remembered than a physical record of it? Nerine's job was then to record the on-goings within the castle.

AZ kinda couldn't care Less about Xanthos's concerns with legacy of a king and such... but he entertained Nerine's questions, partly because he knew ignoring her would just get her indirectly involved with some petty family drama.

However, AZ only ever spoke about things in indirect terms. He discussed his family history at length, but never spoke a word about himself... not realizing this only made Nerine more and more curious about him.

Unfortunately for Nerine though... she kind of didn't exist to AZ outside of the context of her work! Not that she was unique in this regard, AZ was just kind of.... completely closed off to the world around him (this is a huge part of why his relationship with his brother was so bad but don't tell him that !!)

She fell for someone who she may as well have been nothing more than a shadow to is the thing!

Ummm I can't think of anything else to say about her rn. Some of the clay tablets Nerine wrote re: ancient kalos were preserved and provide some of the basis for what is known about the time period in the modern day <3 she's never tried seeking out any of her old works, however.... they may as well have been created by an entirely different person at this point. Edit: Looked at this again and realizing tumblr erased a few sentences wtf </3

[blkkizzat]

Hiii babes <33 I'm back with another long message bc i cant shut up so buckle up ig hsjsjs

Not the hand in the panties reading the Naoya fics LMAOOO bc deadass me on this blog soooo…. When i say i had 2 minutes until my morning alarm while i was reading plug!choso and i turned that shit off and went back to reading like, the all nighter was worth it!! It's the weekend so im deadass trying to re-read it again and take it in properly now that im not sleep deprived hehe

FRRRR the nicki quote like deadass im tryna be someone villain origin story LMFAO. Nahhh because it's always the cheating fics or virgin reader fics that are phD level written and i can Not read those personally lmaoooo. I got too much fire in my chart to deal with that bullshittery 😭

No bc why do i kinda love unredeemable reader??? Like yes girl be on ur thot shit AND get the man !!! It's fiction!!! Pop out!!! Istg every time i think of that scene in plug!choso where she humiliates him and its deadass 'everyones watching her but shes looking at you' Like choso is soooooo down bad and MY GOD HDJDKSK like he didnt care what anyone thought he just wanted a lil luvin from herrrr, istg when i read that i was instantly transported into the story and like in chosos pov and i felt everyone laughing around me and staring and pointing, in my lil emo get up while everyone else is in their polos and mini skirts and just like lookin at reader with so much yearning and expectation like bih I FELT THAT!!!! My head gets so cloudy when i think of that scene tbh like i feel like it actually happened to me!! Ngl i think its bc i was sleep deprived so i was already on some loopy shit and i was still thinking about it up until the point i took a nap so i feel like i dreamed i was in the story??? Like i went to sleep w it on my mind and then it played out like a movie 😫 plug!choso indeed bc that fic feel like a HIT

Big yes on gojo being an introverted extrovert. I feel like if he's not careful it can ruin his self esteem too where he doesn't let himself properly be happy or have the things he wants yk?? Like deadass carrying the weight of the world on his shoulder and its more self inflicted than anything. Like NO he doesnt want to swim in pussy, he wants someone to go home to who will make him sweets and give him lap pillows and play with his cheeks and remind him to wash his face before bed!!! Stg im out here tryin to beat the fuckboy gojo allegations by printing out otaku!gojo on printer paper and dropping it off door to door so everyone can read the TRUTH 😔. Im campaigning that ishh

Okay but the bonnet x anime shirt fit is such a vibe too?? That's what u wearing when toji bring home the hitman salary and is like "go get dolled up kali we goin out to eat tonight, n wear them lil black gloves i like" 😚 i can get behind the kalji (??) agenda lmfao. Tbh toji was the jjk character i seen when he first came out bc my shithead ex was a japanese otaku boy but like actually an incel jsjsjsk ANY.WHO! yeahhh i like my 2d men to be virgins bc im on the 'first, last, best pussy u ever had agenda' shrugs they dont call me cherry nonie for nothing!! But toji hot as fuck like id def smash at least once to say i did before hopping over to shiu hehe. But deadass i always do so well with the playboys and the jerks bc i got that 'angel until you give her a reason to bite' genetic. Wise as a serpent, harmless as a dove 😙 but men stay tryin me so the serpent do be takin over sometimes lmfaoooo

Nooo pls its so much fun talking to u like im sorry for clogging up ur dash and this obnoxious ass long ask lmfao!!! I'm prob gonna send another ask so you can reply to that one without my long ass paragraph on ya blog bc u the main star baby 🥰🥰🥰

Hope u enjoy ur weekend!!!! Im all tucked up in bed and bursting at the seams bc plug choso here i come!!!! Again!!!!

🍒 anonnn

🍒 my pookies! Sorry for the delay im just starting to feel like a normal person rn lol. 

Omfg tysm tho, ahhh not you losing sleep 💗😭. Im really tryna make p3 good for y’all so I really do hope y’all will like it lol. I gotta get it over to be beta read soon cause I have two endings and im not sure which one to keep lol, they aren’t different its just where im choosing to end it that is lol.

LOL omfg no fr. Like im a cancer but baybay my mars is in Aries so I don’t take no shit and definitely not from none of these men out here (especially too cause my Venus is in gemini so im already going to be bored of a man lol. Im not gonna sit around and be cheated on lolol). Also omg you into horoscopes too? I love my natal readings they are so accurate imo.

Yeah! Idk I wasn’t event trying to necessarily  make reader irredeemable but I do like making characters with flaws. Not that I don’t enjoy a good fairytale type perfect damsel reader fic (because those give the warm and fuzzies) but I also love the idea that no matter how big a bitch/meanie/etc you are that whatever person you are really supposed to be with will end up seeing past that and inspiring you to bring out the best in you. Like reader in plug choso a people pleaser and dating choso even on the dl was probably the first thing she’s done for herself that wasn’t part of a “plan” to live up to others expectations. Ahh not you dreaming about it, im so jealous (legit never dream about the stuff I write I want to so bad haha). But I’m so ecstatic that it really did connect with people. LOL I remember saying when I made this blog I wouldn’t write angst but I also think I was thinking of angst where the reader gets screwed over.  I really enjoyed putting Choso through hell (lmfao I mean he’s just so babygirl I need to be a lil mean to him, love to see those tears 😫).

LMFAO! Not you spreading the gospel of otaku!gojo. Haha but I feel you. Even as a confident adult who would come off playboy he’s still a big dork underneath that. Which reminds me I have a CEO!Gojo/guest!professor Gojo fic with MBA!Reader. He comes off as a charismatic playboy but he a dork lol. 

“N wear them lil black gloves I like” AHHH I SCREAMMMED. Im wearing the gloves and NOTHING else we aint making it out the house!!! We can just fuck on top of the money lmfao. But I love a gown. I buy all my gowns from this site called ‘miss circle’ and the more casual ones from ‘mistress rocks’. Yasss tho it’s kalji! 

LOL I do like some virgins like otaku!gojo and my lil chosito but I like that Toji a hoe cause im definitely going to be talking to him crazy as hell. “Bring me that dick big daddy slut.”

No it’s okay!! I like talking with you you’re funny haha so drop by anytime!

LOL im in bed too hungover but im feeling better so imma start on plug choso p3, send me good vibes!!! You have a good weekend too!! 💕💕

[chonnysinferno]

i am So bored so i guess i will expose myself as “not a cjshipper but not NOT a cjshipper tbh” anyway i will send you more music

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLuYLhuXt4HrRFeV7wSFL-1LRMtj5353pq&si=xH73KXa9wHS_C4Yu KIJETESUMIKYOKU MY BELOVED

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLuYLhuXt4HrRIt7XTnyygXomDqlW3xPFK&si=GUDQMCzy0apcWb5d ryuupekosi also my beloved!!!!!!

what was i saying oh right GO LISTEN TO JAN USAWI’S MUSIC RN AND GO TO BANDCAMP AND LISTEN TO ALL OF TOKI GAMING RIGHT NOW AND ALSO 8 (LUKA TU WAN)

https://youtu.be/-ILcH66zGcY this also

i can’t think of anything else i’ve been listening to lately besides maybe jreg and that would give you another thing to put on your dni, centricide fans /this is a JOKE

random song that i usually don’t listen to things in the type of: https://youtu.be/6xr_nVyNMMY

frums is based and other such good qualities: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=OLAK5uy_mu9g_dVsgBz6d8vuWCsyPai59U8XeD8BM&si=buAGe2-pHnKEKm-E

while we r here go listen to dead but dreaming and sisyphus by vivivivivi (5 vi’s)

strobe light: https://youtu.be/7sKs7INaEoA?si=OTjLWaQx5CHtJ3Ws

finally, kulupu jan tenpo: https://youtu.be/fWHZz7ZCXqw?si=43agffZaBd0QvuSr

(i sent you the playlists to all of the songs in kijetesumikyoku n ryuupekosi but they r medleys by jan Misali so, also jan Misali’s other covers and stuff are good and i like their video essays)

(i was about to say like “i could send you ilo tenpo pi sin ala aka time machine reprise in toki pona” but i might as well just do it so: https://youtu.be/gl3W8-IwETc)

(i would send you anachronism but i have looked into myself and found the answer that that would be unnecessary self promotion so letter which has no negative or positive connotations + have a good day + i can send you a post with resources on toki pona + don’t die and other such)

on the cj shipper thing i do not really care to be honest if youre not weird about it / mention it and such its just a personal ick and i dont associate oyu with cj shipping anyways so i wouldnt have known i thought it was you as i dont rememrb anyone else who was associated with toki pona i wasnt going to reac h out to you tho becasue i dont rememebr your user + uhuhuhuuhuhuhuh yea! i cannot interact with other users without lookign like a freak i have negative feelings about you from something but i do not remember what! so i think that is probably in the past anyways onto the music tthese are not usually my genre of music but they are calming adn soothing and i like that the miku one is more up my alley because i am a vocaloid fan but on the side of faster paced music mostly because i cannot listen to slower music without getting bored the music is still good though and there is a lot of it and i will try to listen to it all in the span of a few months. or days ull never know i think this was obvious by the fact i enjoy artists like chonny jash , will wood , and other thingfs in that category (although i understand that their music has variety i enjoy songs like uhhh TME TSE THA rather than say NMTK and SaaST or. CCCC over CiD,, hm ill just link some things under the keep reading as a sample of music taste to not make this post any longer thjan it already is 😭😭😭 *) (edit : nvm theres not even a keep reading itll just be there ig) i think i have listened to vivivivivi's & lamp's music before!!!! i have enjoyed both so far but vivivivivi's more somehwat because of the pixel esque style of music (whihc might not be true for all of the songs they produxce but i am not a huge fan i am a norma;l enjoyer. somewhat) lamp i know is swomewhat in the calming / slow music section ^_^ alos not a huge fan because ive only listened to like one or two songs sooo i do not know toki pona which i think makes up a lotof this post / ask so it would bne great if oyu did send me a post about toki pona 👍 overall summary : music not my usual taste, does not mean they are bad, they are awesome anywasys, will try to listen to all of it when i can also self promotion is okay gimme em have a good day also and also do not die because that would be horrible o7 edit 2 : nvm we jammin edit 3 : you shouldve shared the vocaloid related ones with me first i wouldve been so hooked these are so good

* i do not have a playlist for these so bear withj me

most / all of everything is a lot also SELF-iSH i prefer those over uhhh icimi (in case i make it) and TNA (the normal album) i m not sure what else to put here. throws these at you (you dont have to listen to these btw)

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

AXEL I AM HAVING A CRISIS RN. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO LIKE WIDHWKSNDJ

so i think my friends crush might like me 🧍‍♀️ yikes🫠 IM NOT 100% SURE BUT LIKE THE STUFF THIS GUY DOES??

LEMME GIVE YOU A FEW EXAMPLES CAUSE LIKE IM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND😓

okay so the first example is how he teases me which like i get it people tease each other all the time but he does it a lot to me and from what i’ve seen he hasnt done it to anyone else😭 he’ll tease me abt anything whether it be my height cause im “short” or something i said or maybe something stupid i did like he’ll tease me abt it 😭 MAYBE IM JUST OVERTHINKING IT IDK

second one is this time we were on the bus with our friends,, so what happened was he sat next to me even though there was an empty seat next to his BEST FRIEND?? LIKE WHAT?? idk lowk found that kinda weird especially cause like when we were at the bus stop he was standing with me rather than with his best friend

the third time is when we were at this arts conservatory place and like there were different departments and i wanted to visit the theater department so what happened was him and his friend were going to visit the visual arts department but when he saw i was going to the theater department he immediately turned to his friend and then they shared this look and he came with me to check out the theater department instead 🫠 IDK I FEEL LIKE IM JUST CARING ABOUT THIS WAY TOO MUCH 😭

OKAY BUT THE THING IS LIKE HES ACTUALLY SUPER SWEET AND FUNNY AND NICE BUT MY FRIEND LIKES HIM 😭😔 if he actually did have a crush on me tbh i wouldnt mind BUT I FEEL LIKE ITS SO FUCKED UP OF ME BECAUSE MY FRIEND LKEK ONE OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS HAS A CRUSH ON HIM AND ALSBWLANSKW⁉️⁉️ in my mind im trying to justify it cause i knew him first i was the one to introduce them and hes closer to me than he is to her BUT I FEEL LIKE SUCH A BAD FRIEND LIKE WHAT FRIEND DOES THAT 😭 (omg this could be one of those reddit aita posts or something)

oh yeah one of my teachers screamed out to the entire class that my birthday is next week 💀 she was like “ON BAMBI’S BIRTHDAY NEXT TUESDAY—“ LIKE LADY? YOU DONT NEED TO TELL EVERYONE TIS GONNA BE MY BIRTHDAY?? shes so sweet though like i love her tbh

okay enough about me now 😋 so hru?? anything interesting happened lately?? (GOODBYE I FEEL LIKE IM BEING SO AWKWARD)

BYEBYE ILYSM 💗💗

-bambi

NOT A REDDIT AITA STORY

also i feel like… there’s def something there haha… cause like… interesting??? either that or idk he’s tryna get to know u more??? either way i think u should talk to ur friend about it ! see what she thinks n how she would feel if anything hypothetically happened between u n him… yk…

OMG UR BDAY IS ON TUESDAY WRITING THIS INFO DOWN IMMEDIATELY!!!

ANYWAY i’m good! nothing interesting going on tbh i am just here to post my silly little smaus n then forget i exist ❤️❤️❤️

ILYMMMM

[mitskikissme]

I need to talk about this or I'll explode but bad habit but steve lacy is such a sanuso song. I'm going rabid rn.

I wish I knew you wanted me???

That's definitely from sanjis perspective maybe post timeskip

Here's my hc( mind u I'm in water 7 rn and have not caught up to op yet!!) Spoilers for water 7!!!!!

Okay so usopp most definitely admires sanji and his strength and how he seems very sure of himself the way he presents himself to others the way he talks the way he fights everything!! (I actually think sanji is pretty insecure but is vry good at covering it up. But usopp doesnt rlly see that and just sees him as this super cool suave dude) bro definitely has a crush on sanji for sureee

But usopp also seems very insecure and believes hed obviously never have a chance so even tho it hurts him he comes to terms with the fact that nothing is ever gonna happen there. Like when u have a crush but ur like yeah no way in hell am I ever confessing <3

Anyway sanji is most likely oblivious to all this lmao. He definitely treats usopp better compared to other male characters and I think its because deep down he likes usopp too he just doesnt know how to process those feelings cos man is repressed as hell😭. So he thinks yeah that's just normal friendship definitely doesnt mean anything that I'm always worried about him and enjoy his company more than anyone elses and make snacks specifically for him and take into consideration what stuff he likes or wants to protect him in fights or takes time to ask about his hobbies and is genuinely interested in what hes doing and believes in his abilities even when usopp doesnt believe in himself.

Also listen during water seven when usopp and luffy are fighting the fact that sanji kicks them both and looks so genuinely scared and hurt that luffy implied usopp should leave makes me so insane. And personally I never thought sanji would be the voice if reason I expected him to be like yeah usop let it go and stop trying to disobey your captains orders so It threw me for a loop cos sanji was so adamant on not letting usopp leave and was standing up for him. I am foaming at the mouth btw Anyway

The 2 yr timeskip happens and usopp gets jacked but also matures and grows and I love him so so much he realizes so much about himself and oh yeah also crush on sanji? Bros over it. Hes moved on and is okay being friends and just personally dealt with his feelings and grew in such a healthy way for himself. Like yes it hurt, change and growth are painful but inevitable and time passes. Feelings change and that's okay.

Sanji grows and matures too and comes to accept alot of things about himself and is more comfortable in his own skin and identity! And he starts to realize zamnn usopp has also grown and changed and bettered himself and has such a lively air to him and overall is more confident!?

Then maybe someone in passing (like zoro) mentions something like oof too late loverboy that ship sailed so long ago hella missed ur chance. And sanji malfunctions!!!

Hes like um what?????!?!?!

They're like um yeah it was so obvious hed always follow u around like a lost puppy and sanjis like um this is news to me bruh???? Anyway it hits him that yeah he had a chance. As in had!! Not rlly anymore and he has to come to terms with that.

AND SO I TELL UUU

'I wish I knew you wanted me' also " were you not too good for me my dear?" Like come on its writing itself tbh. I feel the song is in sanjis perspective thinking about how he never realized usopp feelings and how he genuinely cannot believe that usopp had feelings for him considering how much more insecure he was pre timeskip and how he sees usopp as such a caring and loving person and is actually a little bit jealous of how emotions seem to come so easily from usopp. So maybe if they were both mature and not so emotionally stunted/ repressed/insecure in themselves, maybe just maybe??? Something could've happened there.

This is all just my hc so take it with a grain of salt LMAOO. I actually like to imagine them happy but oof I'm a sucker for angst!!

[nonclassyparty]

so after reading through act 3 and all the anons and replies let me just…put in my “lil” 2 cents.

firstly, hongjoong is like by far my most favorite character rn, my king is really just living his life, being intelligent and being a good homie, love that for him.

i feel like considering who i…am like, reading through this story is so interesting bc all i care about is y/n going through her growth process rather than the actual…romance part of the story LMAO like ur good for that. i care sm about y/n and how her character grows that i forget there’s meant to be romance and stuff like i remember act 2 starting off w smut literally caught me off guard LMAOOOOO.

also i had such a hard time reading through the cafeteria scene w y/n and boyoung like the way i had to keep putting my phone down cus y/n was making me lose it but i knew it was bound to happen like 😭 but i had to take a break LMAO

tbh i’m glad y/n went through a reality check since that’s all that mattered to me. ik san is like…the other love interest but idc about him rn LMAO like the development of y/n is just so interesting that i don’t even rlly want her to see san in another light aside from the one that’s being revealed to her cus i just KNOW it’s wat she needs to grow.

like ik y/n said she wasn’t afraid of those girls or of even being an outcast like she’s more afraid of being ALONE than anything but like the budding relationship with wooyoung is already pushing her to grow past this point of needing stability in what she KNOWS. like she literally cried because of what happened to wooyoung and how SHE believed her bringing him there was what put him through that but just before they went in she basically admitted she didn’t care about his feelings.

it’s like…ik it’s gonna be a breaking point rather than just slow growth itself but if that’s what needs to happen than sure, cus i just want y/n to come to that overall realization that she doesn’t need to be the person she is for the sake of others or to protect herself but rather because she loves who she is

like she KNOWS it’s not good to talk shit about other people and she KNOWS what she says ABOUT and TO boyoung is wrong but she’s just so used to needing to be mean for the sake of protecting HERSELF that it’s putting someone who doesn’t deserve it in a bad position. i just need her to grow into that person that realizes this.

like yeojin is…right, like y/n has no idea wat real love even feels like rn and she’s so attached to san and this idea of him that now that her fantasy is breaking it’s making it seem like sans the one ruining it but like she doesn’t even rlly KNOW san and that’s just insane to me like. and not only that like y/n fr needs to get her shit together before she should even be in a fully committed relationship like girl u hav so many issues u need to get through 😭😭 like u need to be happy w urself before u can be happy w someone else or else your being dependent on this person and that IS NOT a real relationship. like obv u can hav ppl help u love urself but i feel like wooyoung and maybe even hongjoong will play a bigger part on that than san or mingi.

but atp i don’t even care about san like he’s already an asshole for saying that stuff about her and her art (when he’s NEVER SEEN IT?!? girl u never should’ve revealed that) and u already said he’s gonna get worse later like i was just gonna leave his ass be cus he didn’t do anything WRONG…….YET. but like the fact that he revealed that he didn’t even care about her feelings and only wanted to sleep with her when he knew she was vulnerable like that’s a whole other can of worms cus wow. like king you had the right to remain silent LMAO. like ik u said he’s just retaliating cus y/n was being mean to boyoung but like king is literally no better than this girl he so clearly dislikes

also like fuck yeosang for making fun of the way y/n eats cus…wtf? like there’s no excuse for being like that, esp for wen it comes to food and weight.

like no i don’t need y/n to fuck yunho i NEED her to get her shit together 😭😭

anyways, watch yeosang be in love w san LMAO

but yea….i feel like i missed a lot. like mingi…boy u better know how to fight lmao.

once again your writing is absolutely amazing and i just adore the way you dissect the characters and flesh them out. i honestly wish i knew how to write out characters with that much depth. the setting is so ideal and kind of cliche yet you continue to push through with making it unique to your own writing. like the take on what having mommy issues does to a girl is just so real and the fact that WE still don’t even know what the true y/n is like cus she hasn’t had that full emotional break down like we know her experiences but were still getting to know HER like wow i truly can’t wait for more!

oh and i was listening to “baby,i’m jealous” by bebe rexha and doja cat wen i was reading this. it literally couldn’t be more perfect LMAO

-🧃

i actually write joong's character with the idea of him being the people reading this story, basically the audience. he's just going to be there helping her out and being the voice of reason tbh 😭

and me too! i pay so much attention to y/n and trying to build her up bc she's just so much fun to write that i forget about the romance and i'm like 'oh wait they expect something with san to happen' or 'mingi should do this and that' 😭 bc this really is focused so much on yn's growth and i hate the idea of a love interest 'fixing' someone and since yn is very much a mess i sometimes have trouble placing the romance aspects of the story in the chapters LMFAOO

and yeah, y/n got a reality check that SHOULD keep her away from san forever but she also has self-destructive tendencies that will eventually drag her back to him (and also make her sleep with yunho lol)

UGHHHHH i want to say so much more but i cant bc i dont want to give out spoilers so i need to end it here. BUT THANK YOUUUUU. u guys are too nice like wow 💘💘💘

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

#26

I took 150 last night and somehow passed out on it so I'm finna take 350 now that I'm awake so that I can get slightly high while being mostly sober by the time my bsf calls me today.

AFTERMATH

I took wayyyy more than 350. I think I took 1.1k overall. Took 200 and let it wear off completely instead of taking the extra 150 after a bit like I planned. Then I started crying.. then I chilled for a bit.. then cried some more. It got badddd I was snotting it up and my arm was genuinely wet wet from all rapidly flowing eye water smh

When I got otp with my best friend I was soberish. I was still crying at that point but I made sure I wasn't sobbing in her ear or anything. She had me spill the beans and by the end of it i was cackling off her mocking my sniffles. She's such a dick i stg 😭

Anyway after she calmed me dowm, she dipped to do some busy work with her mom. I ended up popping another 850 in the meantime. She said she'd be back in 30 mins and I think it was uh.. I think an hour and a half atp so I figured she forgot and I was off the hook for the day. But nah. She texted then called me and I had.. absolutely zero chance of hiding how gone I was.

Mostly I can still hide the junk even when I'm sky high cause with pretty much anyone else im not doing a lot of the talking and my slight chuckles and agreement noises is usually enough. R, however, is fucking hilarious and I'm always laughing at stupid shit she'll say. Which is kinda a problem asss i have a hard time laughing while im that high. My mouth and throat be so dry and to a point where talking in itself is a big task so laughing is pretty much out the question. Plus, kinda weird but i have a hard time finding anything funny in general. Soo when I was sitting there super quiet and not reacting much to stuff she'd say, I ended up fessing up so she wouldn't overthink my silence. Knowing her she probably would've blamed it on herself somehow so it wasn't even worth hiding imo.

It was kinda sad tbh. I'm glad we did get to talk some yesterday but we did way less talking than we'd usually do cause of all of that junk. I went to sleep promptly after we got off the phone as I felt weird. And kinda sad ngl.

When I first woke up I could still feel the remnants of yesterday's dose and I was exhausted but couldn't sleep anymore as I had already slept for I think... 10 hours? Maybe 9 I dunno

Aside from that symptom wise I'm mostly normal. Still feel a little floaty and I'm not 100% for full ass convos rn. I wanna sleep some more but I have a kitchen to clean + I was picking at my skin again so I need to do some aftercare on my skin to minimize scarring as much as I can. I mostly pick at my legs and for that I don't really bother with caring for scars. While I don't really cut myself anymore and I wasn't too too into it before either, my thighs are still covered in scars from them. That plus a few scars that have only recently fully went away made me care a lot less for how my legs look. But nowadays I be forgetting to keep my picking to my legs and started picking at my face again. That I try to hide cause my dad constantly comments on shit like that and I just don't want him to acknowledge it

Lowkey dealing with heartburn and sharp pain in my stomach. Prolly cause I took that much at once and didn't really eat before. I had hella cereal earlier in the day and that was about it

I really gotta start remembering to eat.. I'm fat and all (well. Chubby. Mfs get so confused when I call myself fat 💀) but at the same point I think it'd be kinda sus if I randomly lose weight weight like that. Especially with how shady I've been acting lmao

NOTES/EMOTIONS

Mm. I don't know how to explain my mindset rn. I feel completely useless and I want to just wither away and get forgotten by everyone all at once. I'm sure that's due to the mix of bs I have floating around in my head. I'm tryna keep it together tho. I haven't been drinking enough water as is and I'm sure me crying again is gonna make that worseeee so I'll just try and distract myself for now

I'm so fucking tired of crying. Why can't I just be happy

[jadeee]

✌️😚 howdy, i finally thought of a question and need to send it before i forget it 😂

how did you go about planning Vendetta? what was some of your thought process while working out the storyline and how did you organize it?

howdy partner 🤠 this is a long one lol

p.s.: thanks for asking me this!

basically, i wrote down everything in my notebook from beginning to end. granted, i didn't have all the details figured out but i knew the basics: floyd kidnapping mc, nicky losing it, etc. so after i wrote out the events that's when i started writing chapter 1. some of the things that happened though were definitely not planned. i'm actually looking at my notes rn and there is no mention of a love interest for chris, so it's funny to think that taylor almost wasn't a part of vendetta. also, i don't even think i planned for nicky to come back home and mc was there.. this stuff really just happens as i go!

idk if i could explain my thought process tbh bc other than writing out the flow of events i really had little to no structure whatsoever. i start out most stories by imagining the scenario and then writing it out on paper, that's the best way for me to spit it out for lack of a better word. so i guess my thought process is "how would i feel during this moment?" or "would nicky do that? what about chris?" it's a lot of putting myself in someone else's shoes and then reading over it and making sure that feeling is there. feeling and reaction are so important bc if you don't feel anything while reading it or even care for the characters then there is no point.. it's just words on a screen and not a story if that makes sense. and they don't always have to be happy feelings, vendetta def doesn't start out as happy lol but you feel the emotion {i hope}.

when i write i like to use pencil and paper for my rough drafts and then type it up after i'm done. while i write though i do make notes and it can get messy. i'll put stars by dialogue i'm unsure about or circle words i couldn't choose between like gaze/glance and write stuff like "synonym" or "verify" in all caps so i don't forget. i especially use "verify" a lot bc i know so little about the 1920s {like idk if they had electric dishwashers back then, so i had to google it}. synonym bc i like to switch stuff up. as i've written more i've noticed i use certain words or phrases a lot so i try to set rules for myself like use this word three times and then switch it for smthn similar. it's prob not a big deal but stuff like that sticks out for me so i try to keep a handle on it.

while i type the handwritten version i'll deal with my notes and find synonyms or do research on the 1920s. once i've typed all the pages, i'll try not to look at it for a day bc then i'll have fresh eyes for when i finally do go back. i'll read over it, make adjustments or whatever, and then upload it here for you guys :)

p.s.: most of the time, i don't come up with the chapter title until i'm actually writing the chapter out or until i'm done with the rough draft.

p.p.s.: writing or creating in general is a lot of “what do i wanna see?” so that’s def part of my process too, which is why i think vendetta is so... rich? idk the word but there’s a lot happening! you have nicky and mc dealing with floyd and growing in their marriage {they talk about kids a lot} and then there’s chris who is the new mob boss but also falling for taylor. one minute you’re happy and giggling and the next it’s like wtf just happened?! and then you prob cry a bit, so it’s a whirlwind but i love it so much 💕 and i hope you do too

this was a great question 😭 tysm, I LOVED THIS!

[7-oh-ta1]

Gimme description 👁️ v 👁️

OH GOD I'VE NEVER SEEN THAT I AM LOOKING BEFORE FHDGDGDH SCARED ME

But YOU ASKED FOR THIS SO I'VE PREPARED A SEMI-DIGESTABLE SHORT ESSAY. 💃💃💃💃💃

They both admire the other for different reasons and those feelings of admiration grew over years of living together and acting together...

For example, Tenma may not know the root of Taichi's insecurity about his acting (the root being Tenma himself) but he was able to see that Taichi didn't think he could go further than him, despite claiming that he was going to a year ago. Taichi just accepted it, and it's Tenma who saw that and told Taichi that in reality there's nothing left for him to teach Taichi and that Taichi was on the cusp of something great -- THE arrogant Tenma admitted TO TAICHI'S FACE that he believes and even worries that Taichi will become even better than him and "steal" roles from him.

That's a huge, humbling thing for him because he never likes to admit someone being on par with him. But despite himself Tenma still felt so much happiness watching Taichi achieve his goals and become the person he wanted to be that it was something he wanted to share out loud -- and something that urged him more to grow into who HE wants to be, side by side.

That's why their acting is so important to their relationship imo.... There's much more on Taichi's side but I don't want to talk more than I already have 😭 But now that we've looked at an example of their established connection, let's talk individually!!!!! :D

(Me rn)

So what the relationship boils down to is that they see the world in each other, but they both have their own personal reasoning for holding back. Plus, Tenma's a tsundere so risking being too affectionate isn't in his nature until he feels safe 🤭 deeper than that though, he still struggles with not forcing himself to be perfect and because of stigma towards, you know, being gay, it's not something that's easy to accept for him. Like "Is this really okay? Is it okay to want to see him everyday? Is it okay to be this happy? Mankai has already surrounded me with so many friends, by wanting more from him am I taking that friendship for granted? ...Wait, I can't be wanting more than friendship from a guy, right?!" That sort of thing.

And Taichi can whine about wanting an s/o all day, but he doesn't think he's actually worthy of being loved by someone he holds in his heart. Like mutual feelings?? There's no way in his mind, especially like, not just in theory but in practice. It doesn't help that they're casually affectionate with each other (Taichi sees Tenma off to work and welcomes for him home, Tenma ate a meal with carrots because Taichi was proud of it, Taichi is just physical person and hugs him all the time lol, Tenma holds Taichi's hand because he "has no choice since Taichi's scatterbrained" but it's really so Tenma himself won't get lost and Taichi knows the truth but never says it, a bunch of things tbh) so the line between what's romantic and what's caring for your friend is blurred, and Taichi doesn't want to kid himself into thinking something that's not possible. So he'll keep those feelings to himself and run when he's scared of being left behind like all those times before. He needs a reason to believe this time, it's different.

It's like a one step forward, two steps back dance with them all the time 😩 But luckily I love to watch performances <3 And that's the only way I know how to explain their dynamic because I feel like anything else is doing them a disservice 😭 There's honestly so much more especially with the high school arc following how Taichi is determined to give Tenma all the primary school experiences he never got to have because he's been working since he was a kid and hasn't any friends but I'll just leave it here. ❤

Tl;dr:

Taichi:

Tenma: