#i can't handle the way ed is so expressive

[laceratedlamiaceae]

I'm not super into blackhands compared to other Izzy ships (for fics with a happy ending, at least) because I genuinely feel like Izzy is too good for Ed. Ed is erratic, impulsive, melodramatic, egotistical, short-tempered, and overemotional, but he's also a huge dick and incredibly fucking annoying. All that makes him perfect for Stede, who's tied with him for being the most insufferable person to ever exist, but not for Izzy, whose only real flaw is being kind of a dick sometimes. I prefer shipping Izzy with someone better than Ed, like Calico Jack.

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

Okay, my one and only major complaint about Bad Batch is that I don't think they handled Tech's death properly (I still don't think they should have killed him off at all, but here we are; and even if they intend(ed) to leave things open-ended to maybe bring him back later, the titular characters in the show wouldn't have known that); and with all the reasons I've seen floating out there as to WHY Tech's death was handled the way it was and why the characters reacted the way they did (or didn't), I just want to explain why none of the "reasons" cut it for me. If you're satisfied with how Tech was handled in season 3, I am genuinely happy for you (and lowkey jealous, ngl 😉). I've just been thinking about this a lot and need to spell it out!

Reason #1: "Why do we need to see more of the characters mourning? What we got was enough. We don't need a 2 hour episode that's all about the characters grieving." (Yes, someone actually used "2 hours" in their argument.)

Let's recap what we got: 1) A scene where Echo looks sadly at the Marauder's pilot seat, Wrecker actually sheds some tears (bless him), Omega's in denial, and Hunter tells Omega they're going to retire on Pabu because Tech is gone... followed up almost immediately by the villain dropping off broken goggles as the only proof that Tech was ever on Eriadu; 2) a scene where the audience is shown Tech's goggles but Hunter doesn't interact with them- instead, he looks at Lula, proving that his driving motivation is recovering Omega (which is fine when taken from the perspective that he can't do anything about Tech, whereas he can do something for Omega; but that perspective is ultimately just headcanon because the show never reiterates or follows up on this); 3) Wrecker alluding to Tech (not by name) to try to convince Hunter to be more cautious; 4) Omega name-dropping Tech (wait, does Crosshair even know what happened?... yay for context clues, I guess); 5) Echo name-dropping Tech in relation to data decryption with the team looking down sadly for 5 seconds (I timed it) before Crosshair changes the subject; 6) Phee name-dropping Tech in relation to her not knowing what m-count is; 7) Crosshair referring to Tech's information on Ventress; 8) Omega leaving Tech's goggles in the Archeum with none of her brothers around (hot take: it kinda bothers me that the goggles are given the same treatment as Lula, I totally understand the context/deeper meaning of Omega leaving her childhood behind by leaving Lula, but we're talking about the one relic they have of their fallen and irreplaceable brother being given the same emotional weight as a doll); 9) Phee referring to Tech having a discussion with her about Crosshair while Tech's goggles are in the background (and, noticeably, Crosshair doesn't react at all and just changes the subject back to needing a ship); 10) Crosshair says the squad died with Tech, Wrecker says Tech understood the risks, and that's that.

So, what we got was enough to establish that the characters were sad in the immediate aftermath of Tech's death, that some of them may have stayed sad about it all through season 3, and that the show didn't completely forget that Tech had been a main character at one point.

What we DON'T get is any real reference to what Tech meant to the family as an individual and a brother, any real indication of how the loss of Tech (distinct from the mission to save Omega) influences his family's actions or the story's overall narrative, any actual acknowledgement in the show of Tech's sacrifice having any meaning or the family moving past grief to express any form of gratitude for Tech's presence and influence on their lives, any reference to Tech having a true impact on 4 of his 5 siblings (Omega is the closest we get to witnessing Tech's continued influence on any of his siblings and even seeing that involves squinting/head tilts at times)... in other words, we get a few minutes of sadness, but never any catharsis. We see they miss him, but never does this truly inform the narrative or their decisions in season 3, AND it's left frustratingly vague where the characters are in the grieving process (more on that later).

Besides, no one (that I have come across, at least) was ever asking for a 2 hour episode. At most, Kanan got a 22-minute "eulogy" episode, and most of us aren't even asking for that. I'd have been at least minimally satisfied with a "Mayday moment" for Tech - and that scene lasted a grand total of 20 seconds. What would have been more satisfying would have been the show taking all those superficial name drops and converting at least a few of them into meaningful mentions indicating what Tech means to his brothers and/or how he continues to have an influence on his family and/or how his sacrifice is a motivating factor for them.

Reason #2: "There was no time."

Leaving aside the fact that there was apparently plenty of time and opportunity to make Tech (among others) a red herring...

Let's assume that the showrunners were not only told they only had 1 season left to wrap everything up, but were given highly specific time allotments for each episode to where they weren't allowed to add any scenes (I highly doubt this is what happened, but we're rolling with the "no time" thing here). You know what you do in that scenario when you're talking about something like following up on a main character's death that clearly has left your entire fanbase in an uproar? You MAKE time: you trim down the action scenes, you make the characters walk a little bit faster, you decide whether an extended scene of Echo giving Omega a crossbow that is never going to show up again is actually worth saving (I actually like the scene, by the way; just giving an example), you cut out a few of the extremely vague lines of dialogue Fennec and Asajj indulge in. What you DON'T do is kill off a beloved main character and then rely on convenient time lapses/time skips to just brush over all the fallout apart from a few name drops that do nothing to establish just how important said character was to the other characters in the show.

What's more, they could have EASILY included some true closure with ANY of the Tech name-drops/scenes that were already in the show. Have Hunter look at Tech's goggles before looking beyond them at Lula in 3.02. Have the brothers be present with Omega when she decides to leave Tech's goggles in the Archeum in 3.11. Have any of the brothers say one meaningful line about Tech while they're otherwise silently basking in the sunshine in the end scene on Pabu in 3.15!

Reason #3: "They're soldiers."

Of all the reasons given for why Tech's death was mishandled, I dislike this one the most. What does CF99 being soldiers have to do with the aftermath of Tech's death being reduced to perfunctory allusions? (If you want to get into the argument that soldiers in general have to figure out a way to "move on" and The Clone Wars didn't really spend any time on the clones processing losses after battles, let me just say I don't care for how this topic is covered in The Clone Wars either, and Bad Batch was a golden opportunity for the Star Wars franchise to move past this unfortunate trope.) Fallen soldiers in real life get memorials/funerals too, even if it's months after the battle. Fallen soldiers are honored and remembered by their families and those closest to them. If the show is trying to push the stereotype that soldiers move on from tragic deaths of comrades by being "stoic" and holding it all in and never talking about it, I strongly disagree with the perpetuation of this stereotype; and if the characters as soldiers actually DID grieve Tech in a healthy way, why didn't the show depict it?

Reason #4: "Star Wars writers don't know how to write meaningful scenes/payoff regarding death and characters dealing with death/loss."

The Bad Batch writers proved time and again how brilliant they are at writing emotional storylines with maximum payoff. Case in point: Mayday. Enough said (I'm writing too much on this general topic as it is).

Reason #5: "They got over it."

Maybe I'm reading things wrong, but a rather drastic change in behavior for one character (going from cautious and weighing all risks, to reckless and jumping headfirst into situations without proper backup), and another character including Tech's death as just one reason why he "deserves" to go on a suicide mission, does not read to me as the characters "getting over it." It reads to me as "avoidance behavior" and "continued internal conflict." (Granted, Hunter's more reckless behavior in season 3 likely had as much to do with the Omega situation as it did Tech's death, but the point still stands. And if the point DOESN'T still stand, then I've got even MORE issues with how this plotline was handled, so we'll just keep assuming it does.)

Furthermore, if the characters had truly "gotten over it," there shouldn't have been any hesitation or issue with them discussing and honoring Tech in meaningful ways.

Reason #6: "They DIDN'T get over it."

Right, and we ended the show that way, with no clear resolution to them actually coming to terms with Tech's death and honoring his memory. Great.

Reason #7: "Whatever. It's good Tech stayed dead. Tech's sacrifice meant something."

... Did it? Did it really? I mean, I know I say quite frequently that Tech's sacrifice is what made the happy ending possible for the others (because that's the only thought that got me through a rewatch of season 3). But the show, the narrative itself, certainly doesn't act like it really meant anything. Hunter says in the season 2 finale that they "weren't going to waste Tech's sacrifice" because they were going to retire on Pabu... and that discussion promptly gets forgotten and never brought up again, not even when the squad is trying to stay off the Empire's radar in season 3 after Omega returns. Never is there any discussion that "not wasting Tech's sacrifice" by hiding on Pabu to make sure no one else dies (a very understandable reaction, of course) also goes against the very mission Tech pushed for in the first place: rescuing Crosshair. Never do we hear Omega tell Crosshair, "Tech didn't give up on you, I'm not giving up on you, that's why you ARE going to escape with me." Never is there any talk about "Tech wanted us to live and stay together, so that is what we are going to do." Never is there any acknowledgement at the end of the show that they are all going to live in peace on Pabu because Tech made sure they could live.

The last half of season 4 of Rebels is full of references to Kanan's sacrifice actually meaning something and having direct tangible consequences not only for the family but for Lothal and the Rebellion. For one thing, the show itself literally spells out that the mission to shut down the Imperial factories on Lothal was actually a success because all the fuel reserves were destroyed - Kanan had died, but the mission had succeeded and directly led to the success of the bigger mission to completely free Lothal, and while this is very poor consolation for the loss of Kanan, at least the show openly acknowledged it. Kanan and his influence is also openly credited for Ezra foiling Palpatine's plans with the Jedi Temple and the WBW, Ezra learning to let go and again disrupting Palpatine's plans in the finale, and doing what was needed to ensure Lothal was fully freed.

Imagine how different Rebels would be if Kanan's death had been treated like Tech's: no mention that his role on the mission had any impact whatsoever. No reference to Ezra or any other member of the Ghost crew living up to what Kanan had taught them all - or, at best, there's a perfunctory reference in the epilogue that Ezra decided to keep using the Force the way Kanan had taught him to. No depiction of Ezra or Hera or Sabine or Zeb accepting Kanan's death and letting go of the pain while holding on to the memories. Nothing to show that any of the Ghost crew members act in memory of Kanan or that he is a motivating influence on them. No indication that Kanan's sacrifice drives Ezra to decide to follow up on their initial success with the factories and ultimately completely drive the Empire from Lothal.

Rebels just wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling.

Now, imagine if Tech's death had been treated like Kanan's, and maybe it will become more clear why I have a REALLY hard time agreeing with the argument that the show itself actually depicted Tech's death as "meaning something."

[afewproblems]

Prompts!

50. “I need you to forgive me.”

OR

53. “I’m flirting with you.”

Whichever vibe you’re feeling ☺️ -steddierthings

Ahhh! Thank you for this @steddierthings this one got sad, even though I ended up going with 53. "I'm flirting with you."

"Eddie! Eddie, wait!" Steve calls after him, tearing down the hallway as Eddie makes a beeline for the front door, an angry flush staining his cheeks and neck.

Eddie ignores the urgency in Steve's voice as he grabs the door handle only to stumble as a pair of hands grasp his shoulders.

"Eddie please--"

"Just fuck off," Eddie snarls, whirling around to face him. Who the hell did he think he was, that Steve could say these things, do these things, without any consequences?

Steve flinches, raising his hands in surrender, but he holds his ground as he steps closer, expression determined.

"If you would just let me explain--"

Eddie laughs over Steve's words, a harsh mirthless sound, "explain what exactly?" 

It was one thing for Eddie to quietly pine from afar, to know in his heart of hearts that his feelings could never be returned. 

It was another to have them thrown in his face like this. 

"I know you told me a little about Ozzy that day, you know in the woods?" Steve says softly as he replaces the Tears for Fears cassette with another tape -this one with a handmade label on both sides. 

"And I know you like, uh, Metal and rock music," Steve continues, ignoring the pained snort Eddie makes from his position on the couch. 

It's another night, just the two of them. 

Robin left them about an hour ago to finish their movie, 'alone,' though why she said it that way, Eddie has no idea. 

"So I made this for you," Steve says, pressing play on the cassette player in the Harrington living room.

A mixture of synth and guitar pour out from the speakers as drums soon join them, snapping out a heavy rhythm as the singer starts, his voice a little higher than Eddie was expecting for the music.

'We are secrets to each other

Each one's life a novel

No-one else has read

"It's uh, Rush, do you know them?" Steve says in a near whisper as he walks back to where Eddie is sitting on the couch. He's playing with his fingers, picking at his thumbnail in the same way Robin does when she's nervous, but what the hell would Steve have to be nervous about right now, Eddie thinks to himself as Steve sits down with a shy smile. 

'Even joined in bonds of love

We're linked to one another

By such slender threads'

"I uh, thought you might like the guitar in it, it's not as like, present as some of their other songs though," Steve mumbles with a shrug as he continues looking at Eddie with soft eyes.

He's moving closer now, close enough that Eddie can feel the warmth of Steve's breath on his face, what the hell is he doing?

"Yeah, I've heard of them, they aren't really my thing," Eddie says nervously, inching backward, his eyes widen as Steve follows him, his eyes drop down to Eddie's mouth so quickly he nearly misses it.

'I think it's time for us to realize

The spaces in between

Leave room

For you and I to grow'

"Eddie," Steve whispers, his eyes flutter nearly closed, "can I, I really like you--"

No. He can't think about it again.

He can't think about the freckles he counted, dusting Steve's nose, the flecks of green and gold in his eyes just before they closed to reveal long brown lashes. 

The way his nose felt as it brushed Eddie's own just before he scrambled away across the couch, leaving Steve there with confusion and alarm painted across his face.

It would have been so easy to let himself have this, to go along with whatever prank Steve had obviously concocted. Even if it meant letting him shatter Eddie's heart, just so he could have the chance to feel those lips against his own just once.

"You got me King-Steve, let's all make fun of the freak right?" He scoffs and reaches behind himself for the door handle again.

"I'm flirting with you, Eds, I promise," Steve insists, moving closer into Eddie's space, he reaches for his shoulders again only for Eddie to turn the handle and evade Steve's hands as he steps over the threshold.

"Asshole," Eddie huffs as he makes his way back to his van, leaving Steve standing on his front step, watching mournfully as Eddie gets into the van and peels out of the driveway.

Part Two and Part Three

[sunflowerbia]

ok but can we talk about Stede's face in this moment here 😭

it's SO F*CKING SOFT

I CAN'T HANDLE IT

the way he says "ok", just barely above a whisper

and you can see the wheels turning in his head while he thinks about his next move

then his expression when Ed accepts the gesture!!!

RHYS MONTAGUE DARBY IF I CATCH YOU

[lewis-winters]

Hi!

Recently, I've been rewatching bob, and in ep10 I noticed a moment between winnix. It's right after they meet Sobel: Dick turns to Lew and the expression on Lew's face is something that I can't decipher and so I wanted to ask you what do you think was going through his head? Was it some bitter nostalgia? Or just him silently laughing at Dick's attitude?

Thanks <3

Oh, you mean this?

This is just my personal interpretation, but I always thought about it as like... their double-act when it comes to handling Sobel together, ya know? If you watch Winnix closely when they're both dealing with Sobel at the same time, you'll notice that if one breaks out of attention, the other doesn't. It happens in the "It's a can of peaches, sir"; though Dick does famously smile a bit there, it's barely noticeable-- he's holding on very tightly to attention to resist breaking further, because Dick knows that if Nix is being sarcastic, then he can't afford to be. While only one of them can be in trouble at any time, both being in trouble might be too much (and they might be forced to separate). Kinda like naughty schoolboys when confronted with a strict teacher?

So, in my head, this scene in ep10 is just an extension of that. This time, it's Dick being sassy-- he gets to make a point while also getting Sobel to salute him. Lew, seeing this, clearly can't react while Sobel is still there to see him react, because it's now become a force of habit to play the complete and indifferent soldier while the other is being sassy, and he only breaks that façade and smiles when Dick looks at him-- which, by the way. Super cute.

Dick, who is famously sassy and dry humor-ed on his own, has never needed a tag-team to reassure him of his greatest hits... but he turns around to Nix anyway, as if to say "did you see that? did you see the way I ratio'd him?" and Nix just smiles because "yeah, honey, I saw" like????? can they get any more married?

edit: gif by @rebeccapearson

[moonswolfie]

Dinner time

timeskip!Osamu x gn!reader

Warnings: Reader is skinny, (past) verbal abuse, ED (?)

This is very self-indulgent and I haven't been diagnosed with an ED but my relationship with food can be seen as ED-like so I put the warning there

I was in an Osamu mood so I decided to write a sweet little story for him ahahasshahsah this man ≧ ﹏ ≦ (please excuse my horrible attempt at giving Osamu the accent)

Being married to Osamu was great. He treated you well, was an entertaining person and you got hooked up with the latest sibling drama straight from him.

But the one part that always bothers you is mealtime. Osamu is a great cook, which isn't surprising since he owns a restaurant and you love his food.

This would be great if Osamu wouldn't dote on you through his food so much. He always gave you the biggest servings to make sure you were well-fed and happy. It was his way of showing he loves and cares about you.

Your stomach couldn't handle large servings of food, it never could, even since childhood. Your parents always made fun of you and told you that you eat like a little baby, so you were scared he would make fun of you too if you told him.

So you tried your hardest to eat as much as you could every time, even if you weren't hungry at all or even if you felt like throwing up after. You ate even if you didn't have an appetite.

But it was worth it, seeing him smile happily while you were eating his food.

It was time for dinner again, something you grew to dread more and more.

You see, Osamu thought you enjoyed eating such big portions since you always finished them so fast when in reality you were trying to get it over with as quick as possible. So he thought he would make then even bigger.

You knew he just wanted to see you happy and that it made him very happy seeing you eat his food but you couldn't handle it anymore.

"Come here, darlin'. I cooked yer favourite." Osamu invited you to sit with him. You tried your best to hide your discomfort as you sat down across from him.

Looking at your plate, you already felt nauseous. He really did cook your favourite, but the amount...

You couldn't bring yourself to do it anymore. You ate slowly, and eventually stopped, just picking at your food to give the illusion of eating.

Osamu seemed to notice pretty quick, since his usual smile wasn't there. "What's wrong? Why aren't ya eatin'?" he asked, concerned.

"Samu, I can't do this anymore." you put down the chopsticks, looking at him with worry. He seemed taken aback and confused by the sudden change of behaviour on your end.

"What are ya talkin' about?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Osamu, I've always had a really small appetite. I've never been able to handle big portions of food and I often feel sick after eating." you confessed, looking down at your plate. Now you're going to be made fun of, told you look like a twig, that you eat like a toddler. Maybe he'll tell you to stop being ridiculous and keep eating.

You closed your eyes in anticipation of whatever insult was going to be thrown your way.

"...Why didn't ya tell me that?" his question surprised you, opening your eyes to look at him. He looked concerned.

"I'm sorry it's just- You looked so happy when I ate all your food. I didn't want to let all the food you cook for me go to waste." you admitted, looking down at your plate again.

"So ya mean to tell me you've been forcin' yerself to eat all that food for months now." he crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes. You shrunk under his gaze.

"Maybe... I'm so sorry for not telling you sooner, I-"

"What am I gonna do with ya? You gotta tell me these things, ya know?" he sighed, expression softening.

"...You're not mad?"

"Why would I be?" he looked at you as if you said something really ridiculous.

"My parents used to get mad at me when I didn't eat and called me a baby and a skeleton for eating so little." you didn't dare to look at him after you admitted that.

"Yer parents are assholes. Yer the one who knows yer body the best, I ain't gonna judge ya fer that." you couldn't stop the smile that crept up on your face. He was... okay with it?

"I'm just mad ya didn't tell me sooner. Now I feel bad for makin' you eat all that food." his eyebrows furrowed.

"No, don't feel bad. I was the one who didn't say anything and ate the food." you assured him with a relieved expression.

"Your food is amazing, I would just prefer if you gave me smaller portions from now on." you reached over the table to lightly grab one of his hands, squeezing it affectionately.

"I got ya. And by the way, yer body is beautiful." he said, squeezing your hand back.

[twopoppies]

Hi Gina, this is probably a weird question to ask; when I followed you 3 years ago, I had obsession with your mp fics and would open a lot of them and read your pov about the fics. In one of them you said something like "you cried a bucket full of tears when reading it" , and I can't even remember which category it was in , Do you remember which one it is or which fics made you cry?

Oh, I’ve been meaning to make one of these fic rec lists. Be forewarned, I cry very, very easily so it’s going to be a very long list (and some people might roll their eyes at what’s made me cry) 😂 Even as long as this is, I’m sure I’ve forgotten some.

Gold-skinned, eager baby by StarryDay13 / @daydreaming-sunflower (E, 17K) This was soft and tender and sexy and beautifully done. There were wonderful moments of gentleness and vulnerability as Harry awkwardly expresses his thoughts about his gender and his feelings for Louis, and as Louis reasons and holds space for who Harry is. I really just loved this one. And I cried. So that’s a bonus. 😆

Deux Fantômes by ohpleaselarry (E, 16K) So, let me start by saying I cried through ¾ of this. I promise it’s a happy ending, but it’s heavy and very moving. Please read the tags as there are some triggering things, but it’s also so sweet and gentle and really well written.

of the divine by @thedevilinmybrain (Mixed ratings, 2-part series, 104K) Oh my god. This series. I cried buckets. It’s so beautifully written. The sex scenes are so tender and sexy, but in such a pure way. Their relationship is so good… you can totally feel how much they love each other, the climactic scene OH MY GOD so intense. It’s also got great zouis friendship and a very sweet narry friendship. Tender punk Louis and guardian angel Harry. Read it.

The bed and the carpet by orphan_account (E, 8K) So, this was written a while ago, and because of that there are some things which... irk me (like the use of “orbs”). But it’s really gentle and sweet and sexy. Thanks to the anon who told me they cried reading it. I did, too.

Lovely, made from love by userkant (T, 1K) This was so lovely and so moving (yes, I cried). This author wrote so much emotion into this short fic, please give it a read. I loved it.

may we all have a vision now and then by momentofclarity / @gaycousinlarry (M, 4K) This author is one of my favorite writers in this fandom and everything they do is infused with so much delicacy and tenderness. I literally cried through this fic because of how wounded Harry’s character feels. Read it and then treat yourself to their whole AO3 catalogue.

every universe but ours by @28finelines (E, 50K) This fic is so touching and funny and sexy and I read it all in one go––thankfully just before I published this post! Please go read it because it’s like reading multiple Larry fics in one, each one with that “I would find you in any lifetime” vibe.

Fading by tothemoonmydear (M, 202K) Let me start by asking you to please tread carefully with this one. It’s a very well-written fic, but it deals very graphically with Louis’ character’s eating disorder. At the time it was written, some people felt it did not portray ED recovery accurately, so if the subject is at all triggering for you, please don’t read this one. If that’s not an issue for you, make sure you have tissues ready because I ugly cried through almost all of this. I read it years ago and loved it at the time, but it’s not one I could handle reading twice.

wake the morn and greet the dawn (with hearts entwined and free) by mixedfandomfics (T, 21K)I cried the first third of the way through this because this author painted such a beautiful picture of Harry’s emotions, his found family, and the setting. I love how they slowly unraveled Louis’ story and the tender, sweet way they ended up together. And Niall!! The best friend/brother you could ask for.

Love you in the dark by Perzikje (E, 10K) This is such a tender and moving portrait of these characters. This author does a great job at capturing Harry’s struggle with the shame he feels (yes, I cried), and then beautifully portrays the balm of the way Louis loves him.

for as long as I can remember (it’s always been december) by green_feelings / @greenfeelings (E, 128K) This author always delivers on the angst, so yes…I cried. I loved the sense of the inevitable with these two characters — as in real life, they’re just meant to be. But first they’ll go through hell.

an entire desert in our hourglass by tofiveohfive (E, 20K) I told the author yesterday that I really appreciated the pain they wove into this story because they did such a good job making the emotions relatable –– even with a pre-apocalyptic setting –– so the feeling cut even deeper. Such a good read. And even though the tags said there was a happy ending (which there is), I still cried buckets.

haunted by the ghost of you by missandrogyny (E, 49K) Sweet and funny, filled with great banter and OT5 friendship. And yes…I cried. A lot.

deleted your number (so i can’t call you) by tofiveohfive / @sunflowrsix I think this author does such a great job with writing realistically about breakups and the emotions that are involved. Things aren’t just suddenly solved -- there’s still anger and hurt and a realization that better communication is needed. It’s just very refreshing to read. And of course, I cried.

the best part of me (was always you) by @moonshinelouis-archive (E, 6K) Gorgeous writing. The descriptions of heartbreak and missing someone and still loving them were really well done. And I cried. Of course.

everything suspended by louisandthealien (M, 9K) Set in the late 1990s/early 2000s, this fic is SO so good. And it’s so angsty and so incredibly well written. I felt every bit of tension and emotion and was so wrung out by the end. But it’s also such a gorgeously crafted fic. I just love it.

hope you guessed my name by juliusschmidt (E, 9K) Harry is a devil, Louis is human. I don’t know what it is about this fic, but I just adore it. It’s so moving and so beautifully written and yes, I cried over Harry being a lonely cryptid.

Through Eerie Chaos by mediawhore / @mediawhorefics (GA, 102K) This one is set both in present day and the 1920s and I absolutely adore this fic. This is such a unique and compelling story, the writing is beautiful, the characters are wonderfully realized, and I ugly cried for realz. Such a good fic.

Save your loving arms for a rainy day by BriaMaria / @briannamarguerite (E, 19K) Oh, I really loved this. Beautiful writing. Lovely characterizations. I love how harry makes Louis realize who he is/what he wants, but doesn’t “save” him. And yes, I cried…not from the angst this time, but from the declarations and descriptions of feelings. This author just gets it right.

the impossible now by stylinsoncity (M, 65K) I screamed about this fic for weeks when it was first posted because it’s just so moving and so beautifully written. It’s got a twist to it that makes it both wonderful romantic and heartbreaking at the same time. Happy ending, I promise, but I cried. A lot. Shocker, I know.

Little Technicolor Things by scary_crow (M, 72K) This is truly one of the most beautiful pieces of writing I have ever read and it is an absolutely travesty that it’s not being talked about every day. This fic is gorgeous and poetic and romantic and heartbreaking and an explosion of metaphoric images and everything I never knew I needed but now that I have it I want to read it over and over and over.

Finding Lou by stylinsoncity (M, 60K) This author’s writing is always such a pleasure to read -- they really know how to craft a moving story. Slow burn romance with some super sexy smut and lots of emotions. Yes, I cried.

Your Name Is Tattooed On My Heart by mcpofife (E, 87K) I reread this one recently and it's truly delightful. The characterizations are so well done. Harry is so endearing (I cried over his heartbreak). And the smut is both hot and really emotional. Love this one.

Love Is A Rebellious Bird by 100percentsassy, gloria_andrews (E, 135K) Everything about this fic is glorious. I’m always struck by how well the characters are fleshed out, how their behavior lines up with their backstory, how ridiculously hot the chemistry is, and how agonizing the angst is. So yes, no shocker, I cried buckets. Thank god for a happy ending.

Empty Skies by green_feelings / @greenfeelings (E, 13K) I just started re-reading this the other day and it holds up so well. This author is always a pleasure to read. Their fics just are well plotted and the characters are nicely fleshed out. I loved Perrie as Harry’s bestie, the bitterness and angst is PAINFUL, and the ending feels well earned.

my heart is breathing for this moment in time by usedtothebeach (E, 160K) Probably my absolute favorite time travel fic. I’ve read it more times than I’d like to admit, and every time I love it more. One of the things I like most is how organically the author weaves in canon events…every little moment is an easter egg without it being so obvious that it pulls you out of the fic. Anyway, this one is so moving and so absorbing, I hope you like it if you give it a try! There’s an 18K companion piece to it as well, but you’ll see the link at the appropriate time when you’re reading the main fic (and when you read the scene that breaks your heart –– in the best possible way –– come and scream at me. You’ll know which one I mean).

no one does it better by nodibs (E, 50K) Oh lord. Get your tissues and hang on tight. Such well-written heartbreak. Happy ending, but you have to suffer first.

like a bastard on the burning sea by vashtaneradas (NR, 21K) Heartbreaking, perfect writing. So well-written that the fandom hated real-life Harry for a while after this was posted.

Also, you might want to check out my recs for:

Sad/Open Endings

Major Character Death

Angst

[cobbbvanth]

to me the really interesting thing about the way ofmd handles piracy as a metaphor for both masculinity and queerness is this. stede sees piracy in general as an escape from heteronormativity, and the way he runs his ship specifically as a way of deconstructing toxic masculinity. both of these things allow the crew to become a safe space for him to express his queerness, surrounded by other queer folks at different stages of their various queer journeys. meanwhile piracy for ed is a space for queerness (anything goes at sea) BUT to him it's also irrevocably represents toxic masculinity, not an escape from it. and this is where their opposing arcs come from in s2, because they're at different points in their journey.

piracy to stede is about the community he's built that allows him to be himself in all his camp effeminate gay glory, but for ed it reminds him of the abuse he now knows he doesn't have to endure anymore. and ed realises this because he met stede. (which makes me so !!!! the effect they've had on each other since day one!!) ed supported stede on his piracy journey, helping stede understand that his worth as a man didn't have to be tied to how effectively he played his role in society. this helps stede put his masculinity/queerness/piracy triangle in balance, seeing his life of piracy as a positive departure from the stifling expectations of masculinity and heteronormativity of his old life.

his time with stede kind of has the opposite impact on ed though, and that's where their conflict comes from. ed thought he had a functioning balance in his masculinity/queerness/piracy triangle - because being a pirate meant he could at least have his queerness, and he'd found a way to keep performing masculinity as 'blackbeard'. but stede helped him see that he didn't need to keep performing, he showed ed that there can be room for softness even in their line of work. stede giving ed the option of a different lifestyle did lead ed, the impulsive king that he is, to attempt to cut out piracy altogether. he reacts this way because he's not quite at the same point in his journey that stede is. stede was able to reach a balance after stepping away from piracy and going back to his family in s1, and we see ed doing the same thing by leaving piracy to be a fisherman in s2.

ed's (brief) time away from piracy shows him that he can't keep neglecting one part of his piracy/queerness/masculinity triangle - he needs to find a balance and acceptance of all three. in the end ed puts his leathers back on for love, and was able to lay 'blackbeard' to rest with izzy, helping him properly understand that piracy can be a positive analogy for queerness AND masculinity. stede and ed step away from piracy at the end of the season anyway, but they both do so with a much better understanding of how piracy gave them freedom to be themselves. i just think the way the show handles all of this is pretty neat

[naranjapetrificada]

Waking up with plans to write but instead Having A Think about translating Izzy's concretes to an AU setting, as well as the particular challenges of writing him in the style I have.

Namely: when you're used to writing deep inside a character's head and finding inspiration in imagery, how the fuck are you supposed to handle this guy? How the fuck is a writer like me supposed to be anything but completely laid flat by him between paragraphs?

Most characters in most stories, even and sometimes especially antagonists and villains, are capable of taking joy in something at some point, even if it's something an audience finds morally or aesthetically or socially repugnant. The simple capacity to enjoy things and imagine past and future times when things have been enjoyed/could later be enjoyed is such a human thing that it's relatable or at least compelling when we see even a loathed villain laugh maniacally or revel in the chance to lay out their plan or swell with "righteous" indignation as they talk or think about the ways the world has wronged them. But how much "joy" (or anything even close to it) do we see Izzy experience or express?

We see him smile a few times (or at least seem amused) I'll grant you, but let's think about those times and what's missing from them. I'm going to focus on season 1 because I don't find his rehabilitation in season 2 to be interesting or compelling enough to translate to this AU.

He seems amused when he's trying to put Lucius "in his place" in s1e5. He smiles creepily during both the "there he is" and "Blackbeard is himself again" moments in s1e10. You can argue that maybe he seems...content during multiple moments where he gets to bark orders and bully people, especially in s2e9 when he gets to briefly play at being a captain. The rare enough moments when we see him doing anything that seems like it's even in the same neighborhood are built around what he does to other people, and about feeling like he has power. But where's the engagement with that?

Is he experiencing enjoyment? Does he bother staying to watch his barked orders carried out? Does he savor his steak more after Fang salts it or does he just keep chewing? Does he relish touching Ed's face or even the way his words make Ed shrink back into himself? What on earth does he feel about seeing his own cause and effect in action? The only thing season 1 Izzy seems to actually like is misery, while also being incapable of truly relishing it. It's a believable phenomenon, but fuck is it miserable for me to write.

And I don't mean like "oh god that character has been through so much and spending time in their head has given me an empathy hangover," because it feels like there's an emptiness to Izzy's season 1 misery. It's a tar pit. It's a black hole that pulls in everything around it, but does so without taking note of its awesome power to do so. It's a character who (at least before season 2) drinks because that's what you do, but not because it tastes good or bad or like anything in particular at all.

In the bit of POV he has in my draft, there's still so, so much sensory detail because I can't write without it. In revision I've tried blunting or inverting those details into things Izzy notices but maybe doesn't extemporize on the way other characters would, or if he does it's to complain. But I'm still not comfortable with doing it or pleased with the results coming from it and I don't know how to get past that right now. It's truly exhausting to be mean and joyless and express zero wonder in the world around you, and while that feels appropriate for the Izzy concretes I'm carrying over to my AU, it's not something I have any idea how to write without drowning in misery myself.

[greetingsfromuranus]

What qualities do you like about Double D the most?

Soooo so many things I love about him - I often think about how soft his skin would be, like his cheeks are all soft and squishy, and his neck is probably so delicate and warm, his skin would probably be a bit clammy (he's so anxious and riled up all the time....) but not in an unpleasant way, it's just how he is lol. He's definitely one of those people with really cold hands and other extremities, but a warm enough torso

I love the way his face stretches when he smiles! I love seeing all the different shapes he takes but his smile is my favorite :3 how do I describe it- he isn't lumpy or anything, but he just has so many interesting moving parts, I love how his cheeks stick out and his chin sticks out and his jaw behind his ear sticks out, and his lil eye lines/eye bags, and of course his tooth gap! Big ol teeth...... He's just so wonderful to look at and I wish I could give him a big kiss on the forehead... boop his nose while I'm at it.... he's shaped all awkward like a newborn kitten or and I love it

I love how long he is! Lanky lil ferret creature, like a cat, or a weasel, or a salamander! I like the salamander comparison best, I've studied their anatomy before and it ready fits Double D the best..... They're all lanky and squiggly and flexible just like Double D ^w^

I really like Edds funky posture, he has such a cute lil belly and messed up scoliosis back lol..... like he's all tall and thin compared to everyone else but he's still fleshy and soft >u< like you can see his ribcage and spine poking out, but he still has a big kitten belly... I just wanna hold and squish him! his limbs are all lanky and awkward, but theyre more like that of a delicate baby bird than a bony human!

Also... cute butt........ squishy squishy 🤤🤤 LOL I know it's probably just his big ol shorts but it's still cute..... I love how all his clothes are so big on him! It's adorable!! I can imagine all the textures so vividly.... his outfits are def 10/10 comfy ^^ I love how he just wears knee/thigh high socks, it's very cute and funny, I also wear socks that go up to my shorts sometimes and it is VERY comfy when they fit well.

I also love his tiny lil legs and the way he walks/runs! They go pitter patter as he skitters around like a dachshund or a lizard a a funky lil bug!

And I really like the way he handles his energy... ill start with describing the other eds first!

With Ed, his energy is sort of consistently radiating out, he has an IMMENSE amount of power and imagination in there, but he's big enough to handle it. It seeps out like radiation from a 10 ton brick of uranium.

With Eddy, he has more explosive tendencies, he's short and stout, which makes it harder for him to hold everything in, but he tends to compress it all down into a little ball. He's extremely volatile and reactive, you set him off and BOOM it all explodes out! His little body just can't handle anything new, he's already backed up with so much repressed emotion that there just isn't room for anything new. His explosions are like dynamite, or a star that got too much mass and imploded on itself.

Now Edd is the Anxiety Creature™, his energy is also volatile in nature, but I guess he's more electric, or like plasma. It's the kind of heat that's so hot it starts to feel cold again, like coming inside from the snow, turning the bath faucet to the hottest temp and butting your feet right under it. The difference between him and eddy is that Double D isn't able to hold anything down, as soon as it's created it's let out into the world, however that may be. He wears his emotions on his sleeve, expresses any and all fear, excitement, disgust, and affection he feels because he just doesn't have the volume to hold any of it in. He creates huge amounts of energy, and there's nowhere for it to go but out into the world! His tiny body just can't hold it all in.... it's hard to find a comparison like the other two, something so small with so much energy.... his energy sorta functions like the sun, once you look at it up close.

Here's a diagram I made to visualize it better, (it looks better on computer than phone) I feel like Edds colors are different based on whatever emotion he's expressing, but theyre always bright, whipping out like pink and yellow and blue solar flares. Eddy's are definitely more firey and messy than what i drew, think dynamite mixed with a supernova.

I've been writing this post all morning, and I think im gonna call it here for now lol. I will add some stuff about Double D's personality later lol.

[mysteriouslybluepirate]

hi bestie saw ur post and im kinda curious about this since it's something not a lot of ppl are talking about next to ed's arc and izzy's death and all— what do you think about how they handled stede in the finale? I felt like a lot of the "incompetent wannabe pirate" jokes undermined his progress this season and also him deciding to stay at the inn with ed felt odd as he expressed he wanted to be a pirate and sail the sea. just wondering what other people think about that

[Oct 31, 2023]

Before we get into it, you are allowed to enjoy this show! My past (and next few) responses WILL be negative, but you aren't wrong for agreeing or disagreeing with most posts. Thanks to all the people who have already sent in messages! I can't wait to respond!!

I am an Izzy fan first and foremost, but how a show handles it's protagonist says a LOT about how it handles it' characters overall!

TLDR for this post: In any character-centric media, explore your characters as characters first. Develop your plot around them and their arcs. Don't treat an ensemble cast as faceless props for the story you're trying to tell. Stede's arc is weird because Stede is shoved in places where it feels like he doesn't fit anymore.

Creating a narrative focused on central character conflicts can work. This is how S1 was written. Stede and his actions directly lead to revealing truths of the world that push the plot forward. This worked because I'd argue the strongest part of OFMD overall is its characters. S2 misses out on this strongest aspect by only referencing its characters when it needs something from them.

S1 We went from Stede killing a guy-> The Act of Grace. S2 Stede tells a guy he shouldn't be an idiot and leave behind a calling card -> burning down the Republic of Pirates and killing Izzy. S2 doesn't feel as tied to Stede's arc of growing into a pirate. But Stede isn't the only person this has fucked over.

Each crew member has their role established from S1, we fans know how they work as a family. But in S2 most of the cast can be swapped out interchangeably unless its something that features this side character NICHE (Wee John in drag being good with fabrics, Roach being a cook).

Sadly, by focusing on the larger Zheng vs. Military arc, a story our characters BARELY caused, the audience misses out on potential character development. Instead of our characters facing the consequences of their actions, our favorite side characters are used as faceless narrative tools. This is largely why the crew was abandoned this season unless they had a romantic side plot. Seeing The Revenge sail off in episode 8, it feels like we barely care about them at all anymore.

As seen from @the-buttspie 's comment, even Stede's arc isn't left out of the firing range. His characterization in episode 8 is constantly thrown back and forth between 'Captain doing his best' and 'Village idiot' if the scene needs it.

Analyzing WHY I started to dislike Stede post episode 4 is FASCINATING, and I feel that digging all the way back to the beginning is a smart way to look at his character growth this season.

FRAMING: Stede's early story get's fucked over pacing-wise because his storyline happens side by side to that of Ed/Izzy.

Any dramatic moment is cut short to show just how much the other crew is NOT about to die. Every time I watch S2 with a new person, for episodes 1-3, they'll comment on how much they don't care about Stede's plot. Which is not a thing you'd want for your protagonist in a season of TV that's only 8 episodes long.

Stede goes through a really strong arc from S1 to the start of S2. For the first three episodes of S2, he puts the needs of his crew before the needs of himself. Literally making sure his crew is safe before going down to see Ed's corpse. I genuinely enjoyed how Stede stepped up for his family. How he doesn't blame the Revenge crew for killing Ed, realizing that yes. Ed is the love of his life and also a man who has seriously hurt so many people.

Eps 4-5: From that we see him trying to talk it through with Ed. While both of them aren't telling the whole truth, it's a good start! We're midway through the season, so we should expect things to get fleshed out more soon.

Until Stede decides 'I'm going to bring a man that tortured my family for 80+ days onboard less than 24 hours after my crew voted him off' Yes. Stede loves Ed to a stupid extent, but this starts the trend for Stede to be dangerously selfish this season using his power as captain to overwrite the want of his crew, a habit of his that partially gets Izzy killed.

I really enjoyed Stede in episode 5, and for me, this felt most like the Stede we recognize growing into a real Captain with hints of who he was. I think it says a lot that Stede still misses his layers and silks. That he craves the softness he used to have in the form of that cursed jacket. But as soon as Izzy is like 'you idiot, please listen to them, they will mutiny' Stede gives it up!!!! He's grown. He's listening to Izzy, he's talking with his crew! This episode did the one thing I wish the season did more of, show the reunited crew just living their lives.

This is where Stede stands out, it lets him be a bit more of a leader to the crew. Let him find his groove again. I loved it!!

Now: Killing Ned Low.

Stede choosing to kill Ned Low is the first time Stede killing someone counts. Yes, he burned down the ship French ship. But this is the first time the audience is supposed to care. I think this moment WAS in character and a really important moment for Stede. He chose this. This wasn't up to crew vote, Ned insulted Ed so fuck him, he deserves to die. Ned walks the plank, also referencing historical Bonnet's tendency to do the same thing.

This is where both Ed and Stede make an in-character mistake, having their first time after the rush of 'oh shit, I'm still alive, and I'm hurting and you're here too'. They don't regret their first time, clearly, they both enjoyed it, but both of them can't ignore what fueled it. Stede has had 3 episodes to re-establish himself with his crew, and now has very little time for the rest of the season with them to show off his growth. That's why, after the party, we don't feel like this show is showing off a family anymore. Even when reunited, they barely feel like a united front.

But from this point on, I personally feel that Stede should have toned down the humor a bit and act like he did in episode 3. Well, I'm getting a bit ahead of myself so-

Episode 7: Stede enjoys being popular, following in Ed's footsteps. He holds his ground against Ed, and overall this feels like a natural progression of his arc from episode 5. He knows what he wants in life and Ed not communicating is genuinely frustrating for him. Him being heartbroken and trying to fight Zheng like she's Izzy is one of the few callbacks I feel that works. As it compares a Stede who was supported by his crew, to this Stede who feels totally alone. I loved Stede this episode, only to be disappointed by-

Episode 8:

Where Ed is allowed to have his silly moments in private, I feel that Stede fluctuates between silly and serious WAY too much for us to take him seriously. Stede's response to Ed telling him he loved him being 'I know' also felt off to me.

"You're not a dick, life's a dick" This line is frustrating to me as it's Stede's response to Ed apologizing. Genuinely apologizing for his actions in the previous episode. This could have been a moment for us to feel like Stede and Ed were a united front but Stede's constant joking and not taking shit semi-seriously. Yes. He feels more comfortable around his family which is amazing.

But I can't help but point out how Stede chooses to go along with a plan the rest of the crew doesn't like. What NARRATIVE purpose was there for Stede trying to sell the captain? He has money, clearly. With the loot they still have, and a future alliance with Zheng.

Stede fucks up. His choice a plan that gets Izzy killed. The writers sacrificed Stede being a competent Captain who cares about his crew into what is described as a 'suicide mission' to push Izzy into his rushed death. A disservice to both characters.

ONTO:

Stede abandons piracy

I'm not shocked they did this, not after the other flubs of the episode, but I hate that it wasn't a conversation held between Ed and Stede.

They could cut the stupid joke about Ed being bad at fishing at the beginning and have these two idiots talking about their issues. Maybe establish that, yeah, piracy is a lot, and they deserve to settle down and get to know each other. Even if they return to the sea, this frames it as Ed finally finding peace and Stede getting pulled along, going against his character growth this season.

I'm surprised that they're setting this up now and not at the end of Season 3. Hell, I used to think S3 would be focused on Ed and Stede avoiding/faking their historical deaths. Given all the bullshit they'll have to clean up to wrap up all the loose ends established this season- S3 will be VERY Ed/Stede focused, I think the crew will still be inserted in without care or arc. Characters like Jim and Oluwande will be prioritized as they are in a relationship before our nonromantic characters like Wee John and Frenchie.

Stede and Ed's relationship, the driving force of the plot, still falls flat because after everything it still feels like puppy love. They've spent at most two months in person together, and two weeks in a serious relationship. I don't really feel convinced that they actually love each other. Ed still doesn't know that Stede was kidnapped at the end of S1, or why he struggles to talk about his feelings. Ed still hasn't talked about why he feels he needs to leave piracy, or his issues feeling like he doesn't belong anywhere in life. Their habit of running away the MOMENT things get hard just makes me not care about them.

I blame the size of the Izzy fandom on the fact that if you don't buy into the leads, there's almost nothing left here to sink your teeth into. The moment the show seems like they'll talk about it they hard pivot.

I hope S3ep1 happens after a LONG time jump. I want these fuckers to be snippy like two people snowed into a cabin for months. Sick of each other and bitching back and forth like no tomorrow. S3 is about genuinely breaking down their walls. Until then, I'll stick with Izzy, the Canyon, and his depressing version of this reality.

[pullhisteeth]

hi my love! i have a little request if that’s alright with you <3

so eddie is taking reader on a date. reader dresses fem (skirts, dress, pinks, whites) so eddie rents some cassettes from family video such as madonna, cyndi lauper, the bangles etc. however, once eddie lets them know they have free range of the music, they move all the rented cassettes out of the way and pick up eddie’s own casettes such as metallica, iron maiden, dio etc and get super excited over them. just some super cute fluffy stuff about eddie falling so much more in love with reader?

thanks if you do darling 🫶🏻 x

hi my love! thank you for another lovely lovely request, this was fun! hope you like it

contains fem!reader, fluff [1.9k]

-

If he's completely honest, Eddie has no idea how he got here.

There's a black spot in his memory, hours and days of lost time wherein he must have done something to end up in this diner, across the table from you. He knows that there were two more dates before this, but even those are beyond his belief, and the fact you said yes to a third is entirely unreasonable. 

He can't believe his luck. He's struck silly, your pretty face looking at him softly from the other side of the booth. You're all sparkly and he's convinced you're glowing. There's no light in here really, just the neons on the walls and a couple spotlights over the counter, but he thinks you look divine.

"Eds?"

His eyes meet yours and finds them wide and expectant.

"Huh?"

You smile. Pretty.

"Lost you for a minute there."

If he told you the truth, it'd be that he can't possibly concentrate on what you're saying and the cherry you've got between your finger and thumb. You keep dipping it in the whipped cream, bringing it back to your lips and licking it clean, and there's no way he can't watch.

"Sorry, sorry," he breathes, shaking himself loose. "What were you saying?" 

The giggle he gets from you is holy, tinkling like windchimes, silver on silver.

"I said, we should go see a movie some time," you repeat, smiling.

"Right, yeah," Eddie responds, grateful you haven't lingered on his lack of focus. He rests an elbow on the table, beside his half-eaten burger, and holds his chin in his palm. You shuffle, leaning your own elbow just like his, holding your chin the way he is. You smile at him, your expression turning silly with your eyes fluttering closed. He watches your lashes kiss your cheek and the way your lips curl up, the cherry still dangling from between your fingers. You bring it to your lips again and stick it between your teeth, eyes still closed, pulling it off the stem. His eyes linger on your mouth, the sugary red of the cherry stuck to them. There may as well not be another soul in the diner, because all he can focus on is you, lit up with a wash of pink light and soft like nothing he's ever seen before.

Soon enough the waitress appears, lacquered fingers reaching over to take plates and your glass. As you leave he drops twenty dollars with the lady at the register, and you loop your arm with his to pull him out of the door.

Your palm smooths down his jacket sleeve, reaching his hand just as you get to his van. Opening your door, he helps you inside, the sound of your laugh and baseless objections ringing in his ears while he jogs round to his side.

As his hand curls round the handle he stands for just a second. This is it, he thinks. This is the moment he's prepared for. You're going home with him, three dates in and smitten with one another; he gets to drive you there, show you around like it's not a two-room trailer and let you kiss him as much as you want because there's not a soul around to see.

Pulling the door, he jumps into the seat and turns to you.

"Seatbelt?"

"Check," you respond with two fingers to your forehead in a salute. "The goods are safe."

He laughs a breathy sound that he doesn't know is making your head spin. Starting the engine he stretches his arm over your seat, around your back, looking over his shoulder to reverse. It's driving you wild, though he doesn't know it, how your spaces are slowly seeping into one another. The distance is closing, boundaries blurring; he moves into yours without so much as thinking about it anymore.

Gravel crunches as he floors the accelerator and screeches through the lot and onto the street. Town is quiet, it's late, and there's only one place he wants to be.

His radio's playing an Indiana metal station. It's soft, the volume kept low so he can hear you chatting to him about which movies are playing next week, but he gives in to the urge to change the station anyway. You stop speaking when he does, watching his fingers fiddle with the frequency dial, but you pick up where you left off when he settles on a random charts station.

-

"Here she is," he says flatly as he holds his front door open for you. You pass him, looking around the room.

"My shoes okay here?"

Eddie's home isn't exactly very conventional. If anything, it's a little frowned upon, even though Forest Hills stretches so far back it's nearly half the size of Hawkins itself. In any case, he's not used to people being worried about the thredbare carpet.

"Uh," he drones, lost at your question. "Yeah, sure, wherever."

You crouch down to undo your laces and pull your shoes off, lining them up neatly, toes by the wall. As you stand he closes the door behind himself and kicks his own boots off. Taking your hand, he pulls you through the untidy kitchen, hoping you're not paying too much attention, into the sanctuary of his own room.

It's tidier than usual, though you don't need to know that. You follow quickly behind him and release his warm grip to show yourself around.

He steps slowly over to the bed, sitting in his usual spot against the headboard to watch you flit around the room, eyes darting everywhere and hands even worse. You're pawing at his magazines, staring wide-eyed at the posters, strumming his guitars gently. He can't help but look at you, bewildered that someone so pretty, in a dainty pale blue sundress and white cardigan, is here, in his room. Your pristine tennis socks look so out of place against his grubby carpet.

"You can, uh, stick some music on," he says, nodding to the tape deck on a table in the corner, "if you want."

Beaming, you look at him and then to the deck, bouncing softly across the room on the balls of your feet. His eyes follow you, heart thrumming with anticipation. Its steady rhythm falters, though, when you move the small, intentional pile of tapes to one side and pick up something from underneath. This one's worn down, plastic case cracked and littered with smudged fingerprints.

"You can play whatever you want, sweets," he calls. With your back to him he can't see your expression, but he can see that you're sorting through his tapes, the ones he likes. And he sees when you settle on one of his favourites: Metallica's Kill 'Em All.

The steady crescendo of drums begins, ebbing as you toy with the volume dial, but he's not really listening, worried instead that you're doing this for him. When you turn around you're grinning, bobbing your head lightly, treading over to him slowly.

"You didn't have to put this on," he tells you.

"What d'ya mean?" Your eyes are wide with confusion, expression malleable as you settle beside him, seated on the edge of the bed, taking his hand in yours.

"This is my music," he says. "You don't have to listen to it just 'cause you're in my room."

"I like this album," you tell him honestly, face plain, and your naïve intonation makes him choke a laugh.

"What?!" you ask through the beginnings of a smile.

"I just-" He's laughing, rubbing his free hand up and down his face, pinching his nose. "I bought you all those tapes, I just assumed, I-"

"So that's why you have Cyndi Lauper over there!"

"I just assumed that's what you listen to, y'know-"

"I did think, wow, Eddie Munson, Cyndi Lauper, unexpected-"

"-a pretty girl like you, must listen to prettier music than me-"

"-imagined you holed up in your room, 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on blast when no-one's home-"

"-hey!"

His fingers at your sides cut you both off, pulling a screeching laugh from you, your giggles blending with his as he wrestles you onto your back.

"Eddie, Eddie! Stop it, I-"

"I cannot believe you'd think I listen to Cyndi Lauper!" he yells over you, his assault unrelenting until you bring your knees up under him to kick him in the stomach. He huffs out an umph and stills, flopping down beside you.

As you finish giggling and catch your breath, you turn on your side to face him. He's lying on his back, eyes on the ceiling and hand splayed across his chest, feeling the drum of his heart beneath. Turning his head to look at you, he finds you looking back at him, your hair more tangled than before and face flushed pink.

"You did that for me?" you ask him, voice quiet like you're uttering obscenities.

"Did what?"

"Bought all those tapes. There's even Madonna over there."

He laughs, his warm breath on your face making you scrunch your nose. Though he wants so badly to kiss it, he holds off.

"Yeah," he finally admits. "I guess I just- I dunno, I never pegged you as a metal girl."

"How judgemental of you, Munson," you tease.

"Can you blame me?"

"I like being unpredictable," you tell him.

"That's one word for it," he says with a laugh, sitting up. He twists and holds his hand to you, pulling you up with him when you take it. He likes the way the rush of air lifts your hair. "You really like this?"

You hum, nodding, and sing along playfully. Standing quickly, you turn to him and scrunch your face, hands out in front of you as though you've got a guitar in them. The sight of you, in your pretty clothes, all rosy and smiley, playing air guitar to Metallica, fills him with that funny, fizzy feeling that's been pestering him since your first date. It's like firecrackers in his bloodstream, or static down his nerves, and it makes his fingers tingle.

He reaches his hands out to take your waist. As he pulls you in you stop the air guitar and let him move you as he wants: his palms smooth down your hips and to your thighs, where they urge you onto his lap. Your arms wind around his neck as you find your balance.

With his hands back on your waist, he looks up at you.

"You," he whispers, "are so pretty."

He relishes in the way your face warms at his words, the coy expression that flashes over your face, and reaches up to kiss your cheek. Your thighs are warm as his hands roam up and down, and he begins to litter kisses across your other cheek and onto your jaw.

"Eddie," you breath over him, eyes fluttering closed.

"So pretty," he repeats. "I'm so fucking lucky."

"You're pretty too," you giggle.

"Why, thank you," he says, smiling into your throat.

"So," you begin, "will you play me some Iron Maiden?"

"Christ."

"What?"

"It's like you're trying to kill me."

"What do you mean?!" you ask with another laugh, one so light it feels like there's a breeze in his brain.

He emerges from the crook of your neck and looks at you. Your face is still warm, your eyes sparkly and wide, and he wants to commit every square inch to memory.

"You're perfect," he tells you.

-

[thekristen999]

A Light in the Darkness

Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) Characters: Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley, Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Howie "Chimney" Han, Bobby Nash

Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Team as Family, Future Fic, Alternate Universe Post-Apocalypse , Established Relationship

Notes:

I've been battling writer's block. This is all about vibes so, please just go with it. :) Not beta-read.

...

His coordination is off; fat-feeling fingers fumbling with his turn-out coat, the snaps refusing to work. Exhausted, Eddie gives up wrestling with the damn things, yanking at the bottom until all the snaps come undone like the rest of him.

The coat slips off his shoulders, his body trembling harder after losing a layer of protection. Eddie squeezes his eyes closed; blossoms of red and orange flash beneath his lids, his breath hitching in his throat. There's no feeling left in his hands; they tremble, reminding him of geriatric patients locked inside veteran's hospitals. The hem of his T-shirt is untucked; his bunker pants sag around his hips, his ripcord suspenders the only thing holding them up.

He yanks them off his shoulders, almost tripping over his own two feet as he staggers out of them, leaving his pants on the floor.

A voice tells him to pick them up, but he can't be bothered to care. His jaw chattering loudly; he's so damn cold. Eddie hugs himself, longing for warmth, rubbing his hands up and down over the clammy flesh of his forearms. The wires inside his brain must mixed-up given how damn hot it is outside. The smell of smoke still reeks in the air, filling his nostrils with ash, tickling his lungs. Black smudges stain the left side of his face; two days of rough stubble irritates his cheeks. He stumbles around his make-shift quarters, but it's difficult to see.

There's no way he can handle lighting candles, but it's okay--- he wants the darkness to consume him. The screams, so many screams, still echo inside his ears, driving him towards the bathroom.

The cold robs his muscles of strength; they're too stiff and cramped to work right. Somehow he figures out the shower, twisting the knobs all the way in one direction until steam billows from the spray. His belt buckle becomes a puzzle he can't solve, the laces of his boots an unfathomable obstacle. Biting his bottom lip, not feeling the pain of splitting it open, Eddie walks under the harsh jet of water, clothes and all. He craves burning, scalding heat---like all those roaring flames.

Water soaks his t-shirt, pools in the creases of his uniform pants, his underwear, swirling down the drain.

His body won’t stop shivering. He stuffs his hands between his armpits, sinks to his knees and rocks back and forth under the faucet. Time stops-----loses meaning. 

The building explodes, the flying debris and fireball a perfect snapshot, forever scorching his retinas. The screams of all those he couldn't reach—couldn’t find—on repeat inside his head.

Tears leave warm trains over his clammy cheeks.

“Eddie? Holy shit. Hey, I found him! I found, Eddie!"

“Eds, talk to me. Shit. I need help!"

"Buck, what’s going on?"

"I don’t know, I just found him this way."

A hand, Buck's hard, cards through his hair. 'We've been looking for you for days."

Has it been that long?

"Hen, Chim. We need you over here!"

Voices all around, a jumble of tones and emotion. Then hands, prying, pulling, lifting.

"Eddie, can you tell me what’s going on?”

He looks up, squinting at his Captain’s worried expression, but his lips are too heavy to move. Someone holds him up by the shoulders while his legs buckle under his weight.

“He's freezing." That sounds like Buck, Eddie thinks despite his muddled brain.

“And you found him like this?" Bobby asks.  "Inside the shower with all his clothes still on?"

"Yeah, just like this."

Buck sounds scared. Eddie hates that he’s the reason he’s upset.

“Eddie, listen to me. You’re in shock. We’ve going to remove these wet clothes and get you warm again,” Hen tells him.

A part of him wants to smile, let her know that's fine, but how can it be? When all the voices he couldn't reach say otherwise.

The building incinerates, the cries for help swallowed up by more explosions.

Blackness closes in, sucking all the heat from his body. Anxiety grows around him, the voices of his team becoming urgent.

A part of him feels like a puppet with its strings cut, his arms and legs manipulated without his permission. His clothes are peeled away, limbs flopping back in place, dead and useless.

His skin begins to tingle all over, sharp pin pricks, angry bites of a million insects. He panics at the sensation, writhes and fights----running towards the flames.

"Eddie, it’s okay."

The hands are back, soothing, rubbing, holding him. Warm breath at the nape of his neck...coarse hair that tickles his bare shoulders. Heat soaks into his weary bones and he leans against strong muscle, rests the back of his head along a collarbone.

"Cold,” he whispers.

"I’ve got you, Eddie. I always have," Buck tells him, holding him closer.

Of course he does, Buck has always been there with him through thick and thin. Always light in the darkness.

Fingers curl around his left hand, and he’d recognize Hen's firm but gentle grasp anywhere. Goose flesh spreads across his arms, but her fingers try to soothe it away, rubbing up and down his arms.

A calloused hand pushes down on his other shoulder, and he opens his eyes, not realizing they've been closed all this time. Chim sits at his right side. “Stay under the blanket and be still."

His team surrounds him, sharing heat he so desperately needs. Chim huddles closer and Eddie feels his cheeks grow pink.

“Don’t get modest on us," Chim admonishes. "You’re slipping into shock."

Eddie understands these types of survival techniques. Body heat mixes with fresh adrenalin, causing all the hair all over his body to stand on end, hyper-aware of the close proximity of everyone.

The energy of waking saps the rest of him and despite the inner-self that yells about breaching all of his private barriers, Eddie relaxes within the warm glow.

Weapon's fire becomes a muted, fuzzy memory....one to be locked away with all the other bad stuff that if he allowed himself to dwell on, would drown him in the blackness of it all.

“You know there was nothing you could have done, right?” Buck whispers in his ear, soft and gentle. He thought he’d been sending everyone toward shelter. That was his job. To search for survivors in an all-consuming wasteland.

Eddie had guided them all toward shelter, telling them it was safe. Except it wasn’t. An explosion occurred----then nothing. It’s his fault, it’s his---

A hand squeezes his shoulder. “Don't,” Chim breathes.

Hen buries her head in his side. He can feel her eyelashes open and close against his skin. “It was an accident, Edmundo."

Eddie can still hear the screams. He rubs his thumb over her knuckles.

"You would have died if you had gone in,” Bobby’s voice rumbles off to the side where he stands guard over them.

It was his Captain who had kept Eddie from running toward the shrieks of death---yanking on his coat, the others wrestling him to the ground without a word.

"They’ll be others who need to be saved," Chim says, taking Eddie's other hand, squeezing. "And we need to be ready."

Buck holds Eddie tighter, chin resting in the crook on his neck, pressing a soft kiss to his ear. "I'll be by your side. Like always."

Maybe they’re right.

But that hadn't kept Eddie from going back out there, searching, hoping that maybe, there’d been one person left, one person out there wandering...

Eddie closes his eyes fighting against what-if’s, allowing his body to melt against Buck, basking in the protection of his team. Of his family.  

"Okay,” he whispers. Knowing tomorrow, they'll all go out there again. 

..

Maybe this will kick-start the Muse.

AO3 Link

[chuplayswithfire]

Watching the clouds conversation and it is never so clear that Ed and Izzy are not only having two different conversations, but are in fact focused on two entirely different issues.

It's easy to call Ed distracted, and I've seen a number of posts do it and use the way he says Izzy's name repeatedly as evidence, but what we actually see is that Ed focused from the start on the distant sky and the clouds that are central to his developing plan.

The scene opens with Ed watching the sky, and Izzy walking up to join him. We can observe that Izzy is already a bit annoyed by the way he notes that he's been looking for Ed everywhere. Ed's eyes remain on the sky until Izzy finishes speaking about the Spaniards, at which point he notes their dramatics, but his eyes promptly return to the sky. Izzy acknowledges this distantly, but says brings up that they really need a plan - and Ed interrupts to ask him about the sky he's been observing.

The thing about the way he says Izzy's name, is the whole conversation Ed is quite calm. He repeats Izzy's name, but it's clearly to get his attention and make him stop talking. As soon as he has his attention, he asks the infamous frankfurters question and the camera focuses on Izzy and his unimpressed face. Izzy says they look like clouds, and Ed looks down from the sky but not towards Izzy as he expresses some irritation of his own - yes they look like clouds because they are indeed clouds, but if you put some imagination into it -

It's only when Izzy has confirmed that the clouds do indeed look like sausages, given secondhand confirmation to Ed's own interpretation of the sky, that Ed turns his back on the sky, looks at Izzy, and takes in the rest of the ship. Once he confirms that the plan is the usual for the crew, he turns back to regarding the sky, and the distant clouds that we're never shown.

To the audience, who won't have Ed's plan revealed for another half of the episode, it looks as though Izzy is trying to corral and unfocused and an interested captain. But knowing what we do, that Ed is devising a plan that he will calculate down to the minute, it's easy to see that he's not distracted by anything but confirming his interpretation of the distant weather. Handling the crew is nothing that his own crew can't handle. The weather, and the predictions he's making based upon it, however, he clearly needs to handle himself, as his own first mate can't catch the drift when he's inquiring about it.

And, Ed should be a better communicator. That's for sure. There are ways that he could have spoken to share his coming plan and why he isn't concerned.

But Ed's priority and Izzy's priority are not the same. Ed is fine with staying here until they brilliantly float away in the fog, because he hasn't yet had enough time to review the ship and meet Stede. These are Ed's priorities, and the reason that he had them attack the Spanish and save The Revenge in the first place.

But these are very much not Izzy's priorities, as he makes very clear. Izzy wants Stede's crew to repair the ship, so that Ed's crew can then kill Stede's crew, so that they can then get on their way, presumably with the plan of taking the ship for part of a fleet or selling it later. Izzy assumed that Ed would want Stede dead for the insults in last episode, and clearly doesn't understand why he saved him instead. Izzy has no idea how to interpret Ed's behavior, because Izzy is convinced that he and Ed want the same thing. Only Ed at this point is aware that they do not want the same thing, and as he's already noted, "sometimes it's like pulling teeth with you, man".

I think that Ed doesn't share his plan because he already knows that the end results he wants and the end results Izzy is after won't match up. He's already being chided for not focusing and not having a plan and not going along with the way that Izzy wants things done, why share the plan which makes it very clear that he's not interested in leaving just yet, when he could do his own thing, and continue on with what he's actually after - talking to Stede.

[enderwoah]

DOUBLE LIFE/HOMESTUCK HANDLES & TYPING QUIRKS

ello ello ello! happy belated homestuck 4/13 AND hermitcraft birthday! it's been a very long time since i have touched this au, but it occasionally starts rotating around in my brain so i decided, "hey! it's not like the homestuck presence in this fandom can get any more dead! why don't i make some headway on that?"

this will be a comprehensive list of all fourteen double life members' chumhandles and typing quirks (where applicable; otherwise, i might just put down their general typing style). it'll go in rainbow order for the trolls, but there are only seven of them so some may be skipped! c'est la vie.

for people that don't know homestuck, a chumhandle is essentially an internet username used on the messaging system "pesterchum" (or, for the trolls, the messaging system "trollian"), consisting of two words that are usually unnecessarily rare and big. a typing quirk is something trolls all have to differentiate themselves from one another, both for expression purposes and also because they all have to use their blood colour as their online colour and it could get confusing. hope that helps, let's go!

-

TROLLS

grian (rust):

sign: true aires, sign of the excavator

no noticable typing quirk, but does use an overabundance of bird puns whenever he gets the chance. not because he thinks they're funny, but because they get on other people's nerves and gets their feathers in a twist.

procrastinatingBellbird [PB]

procrastinating: to delay or postpone action; put off doing something. is this not grian's entire existence? have you watched his hermitcraft videos? can the man go half an hour without getting distracted by something and putting what he should be working on off for later? like..oh, i don't know. the back of his base?

bellbird: the loudest bird in the world! you little attention-seeker, you.

ren (bronze):

sign: taurga, sign of the guardian

unnecessarily and often incorrectly uses the olde version of words, adds a lot of 'e's and 'th's and 'st's where therest shouldn'th be for ye olde effecte. is a hemoanon (someone that does not reveal their blood colour by typing in gray).

cynoidCacology [CC]

cynoid: dog-like; canine. speaks for itself.

cacology: bad choice of words or poor pronunciation. this is partially a jab at his 'incorrectly uses old words' bit and partially a slight reference to his constant innuendos being played off as simply a bad choice of words. someone probably lied to him and told him that this word meant royalty and was really old and cool.

tango (gold):

sign: gemiborn, sign of the uproarious

the first actual typing quirk, tango types in ALL CAPS, EXCEPtt FOR HIS tt'S ttO MAttCH THE PAttttERN OF HIS HORNS!

reinedAzidoazide [RA]

rein[ed]: keep under control; restrain. it'll make more sense with the second part.

azidoazide [azide]: the most explosive chemical compound ever created. so together, his entire chumhandle is just a big sign that yells 'i have thinly-controlled anger issues!,' lmao.

bdubs (olive):

sign: lenius, sign of the restless

SPEAKS IN ALL CAPS. TYPES VERY SPORADICALLY. CUTS OFF HIS. SENTENCES. CHANGES HIS 'I'S TO '1'S AND HIS 'S'S TO '2'S WHEN THEY'RE NEXT TO EACH OTHER. LIKE IN W12H. AND F12H. (to make a 12! like on a clock.)

nyctophobicBryophyte [NB]

nyctophob[ia]: extreme or irrational fear of the night or of darkness. he definitely has it! lol!

byrophyte: the informal group name for mosses, liverworts and hornworts. oh yeah, baby. moss time, baby. eats moss, prolly. and has a cool cloak!

scott (cerulean):

sign: scorza, sign of the strategist

he's both too cool for an elaborate typing quirk and too lazy to go out of his way to type in perfect capitalisation like he wants to. Middle ground, he capitalises all his 'M's and he types as forMally as possible without having to try. uses eMoticons as punctuation lot (:K and keysMashes rather often. (his sign, scorza, looks like a weird M, so he just ran with it. if the people he's talking to can't deduce that it's him, that's their problem, not his. his horns look like antlers and he felt like a K was the only letter that really encompassed the antlers vibe (((:K)

kenodoxicHart [KH]

kenodox[y]: an obsolete, rare word meaning the love, study, or desire of vain-glory. only someone truly vainglorious would flaunt their vainglory. and you know what? good for him.

hart: a male deer; a stag. sure, he could have just gone with stag, but 'hart' sounds like 'heart,' so it's just unequivocally better in every way. his lusus is a horrible combination of a hart and a spider.

cleo (purple):

sign: capripia, sign of the brusque

she really doesn't have a patterned quirk like some others might...she simply prefersssss to elongate her 's'es whenever it feelsssss...sssatisfying. never uses caps. alwaysss usesss precisssse punctuation. makes use of ellipsesss to enunsssiate her pointsss. will often change the 'c's to 's'es in sssertain wordsss because typing out a bunch of 'c's doesn't have the ssame effect. (her horns are painted to look like snakes, and thus!)

vafrousPhantomime [VP]

vafrous: cunning; sly. sounds about right, yeah.

phantomime is not an actual word! it is a combination of phantom (a ghost) and pantomime (a dramatic entertainment, originating in Roman mime, in which performers express meaning through gestures accompanied by music OR a theatrical entertainment, mainly for children, that involves music, topical jokes, and slapstick comedy and is based on a fairy tale or nursery story.) to explain this would be to explain a lot of cleo's backstory, which is not what this post is for; the simplest way to explain the phantom bit is "blame joe hills." the pantomime bit is just a very mild reference to The homestuck song, and also...she's a clown. not, like, super seriously, but she is a clown.

etho (fuchsia):

sign: pius, sign of the free

/? you won't catch him dead making fish puns. that's all he wrote. /? (they're like little fishing poles :D y'all really think etho is out here with the patience to constantly change the way he types? absolutely not.)

xericQuerist [XQ]

xeric: containing little moisture; very dry. again, this is not the place to delve deep into backstory shenanigans, but it's safe to say that despite being a fuchsiablood, etho does not feel very free underwater. also, he's a dry texter <3 good for him

querist: inquirer; someone who asks questions. he's questioning the SYSTEM and the PLANET he'll have to take over when he gets over and the CHANGES to the FLAWED HIERARCHY it holds so dear <- deranged. half of the reason he picked his name when he was like 12 was that having two super rare letters as his handle looked sicknasty.

-

HUMANS

(note to all my non-homestucks: humans have no use or care for the funny signs i've been putting for all of the trolls, but i'm going to put them here in case anyone wants to see what they Would be :)

scar (orange):

sign: aquasci, sign of the charitable (snrk)

all lowercase, little punctuation aside from EMPHASIS!!! sometimes the emphasis comes in the form of an *appropriate* amount of asterisks.

affluentAllay [AA] / affluentVex [AV]

affluent: having a great deal of money; wealthy. how else can you put it? the man is loaded!

allay: diminish or put at rest (fear, suspicion, or worry). an in-universe reference to actual minecraft allays.

vex: make (someone) feel annoyed, frustrated, or worried; cause distress to. affluentVex was his original handle before allays came out and he shelved this to being an evil alter ego that frequently appears. as this is homestuck and i do need to clarify, this evil alter ego is not real.

bigb (dark blue):

sign: sagittanius, sign of the nascent (wait i love that actually that's so good)

Average mobile user, doesn't turn off autocorrect, all of his sentences start off capital and everything looks fine until you notice the lack of punctuation or commas or anything the phone wouldn't be able to automatically pick up on

nitidNyctomania [NN]

nitid: bright with a steady but subdued shining. it's typically used to describe the moon.

nyctomania: the condition of being very happy and comfortable in the dark. half of the group was convinced that bigb was a troll because it always seems to be night whenever he talks to his friends. he literally just lives in a place where the sun doesn't rise. and you know what? he's happy.

impulse (yellow):

sign: gemcer, sign of the intimate (0_0)

uses lowercase letters, but proper punctuation! uses fullstops at the ends of statements, proper commas, question marks, and exclamation points! maybe even two for the extra emphasis!! often uses FULL CAPS to denote shouting (not that he does it often)!

sanguineVenule [SV]

sanguine: optimistic or positive, especially in an apparently bad or difficult situation OR blood-red. he's just an optimistic and happy guy! also a blood player!

venule: a very small vein, especially one collecting blood from the capillaries. he's trained in first aid for some reason? also a blood player!

pearl (gray):

sign: licen, sign of the worshipper ((santa pearla voice) more like sign of the worshipped amirite)

nothing tooooo special, she types like a normal person and elongates certain words for the emphasis!

pearlescentMoon [PM]

pearlescent: having a luster resembling that of mother-of-pearl.

for the record, she has been adequately clowned on for having what is basically her full name as her online handle, but she simply couldn't be bothered to put in all the effort of finding those stupid big words. maybe there was a point in her life when she was, like, eleven, where her handle was iridescentLuna [IL] or something, but those times are far, far behind her now.

martyn (lime):

sign: cano, sign of the translucent (wth is that even meant to mean)

types like its a conversation or real dialogue, so expect either very long messages or for him to send about seven messages just to form one complete thought. when speaking to ren, he will mirror the old-speak as well as possible (unless its a serious moment).

hearkeningCavalier [HC]

hearkening: listening. i think we can all guess.

cavalier: a knight. i also think we can all guess. also, it's a breed of dog! cheeky reference to his king, that is.

joel (forest green):

sign: leiborn, sign of the paradox (oh i love this)

when normal, he types like a normal person. makes more typos than your average man, but thats alright whereas WHEN HE GETS HYPE ABOUT SOMETHING HES PRFONE TO LONG BOUTS OF TPYING IN CAPS AND HE TYPES FAST AN FRURTYOUIS SO TEHTEERE AE TYPOS ABOUnD

dionysianFleer [DF]

dionysian: relating to the sensual, spontaneous, and emotional aspects of human nature. joel just gives vibes, really. i think he heard that dionysus was the god of madness and thought it was cool because he really does go crazy at the block game AYEEE

fleer: an impudent or jeering look or speech. he's a prick. moving on,

jimmy (light blue):

sign: taurmino, sign of the lonely (my man...)

uses caps for shouting *very* often because he is a shouty boy, and uses asterisks for emphasis. is very prone to using an overabundance of question marks because...funny?

juxtaPredestination [JP]

juxta-: a prefix meaning near; alongside.

predestination: the divine foreordaining or foreknowledge of all that will happen. jimmy is basically the resident jade harley. not in the sense that he knows what's actually going on, more in the sense of him getting thrown into Situations and then he goes "oh, i saw this in a dream once!" and then gets clorted by whatever it was that he saw. but he believes in fate and luck very heavily and sort of thinks of it as an endearing rival.

-

CONCLUSION:

so yeah, those are all the handles! i will do the extras (mumbo, lizzie, and skizz) eventually and put it in the post, so stay tuned for that (ill reblog this when its done <3)! hope you enjoyed the result of my days-long bout of insanity! reblogs appreciated, have a nice day/night!! <3

[marsupials-of-mars]

So, I don't think Stede wanted to kill Ned. Ed told him not to, and he did, but I don't think he wanted to.

I know it's been said that both sides still don't fully understand why the other would want them or the kind of life they have. They both think they have to change to be worthy, no matter what they are directly told by the other. It's a fundamental part of their identity that they hate their prior lives.

Think of the first scene of the season, a rugged bearded pirate stede killing his romantic rival in cold blood, an act of utter devotion and unbridled passion, and Ed loves it.

This part of his identity extends to how he expresses himself romantically. I'm not saying that he can't just be eager, like in the second kiss and the sex, especially because he's finally freeing himself from repression of his sexuality. But think about the context.

He wants to show Ed he cares. Ed has defended him with force. He sees Ed being berated and tortured, and he can finally do something about it. Ed tells him not to do it, but Ed is only saying that to spare his fragile mind. Ed would kill Ned in a second, and now Stede is a real pirate, and he is going to show Ed that he can pull his weight, protect his love, use his mean voice, be a proper captain.

So, afterwards, we have Ed, who didn't want Stede to kill Ned for not only Stede's sake, but for his own. Because he's even more sick of the brutality now than ever, he was finally a little settled with a boyfriend who can take things slow with him, and help him appreciate beauty. But he won't say that, because stede made his choice, and he's here to comfort him, because he must be having a horrible time, with how he's handled killing in the past.

But we also have Stede, who catches him entirely off guard. Because he sees the killing of Ned as a GRAND ROMANTIC GESTURE. The shedding of the self to become something new and worthy, not just for Ed, but because he said he wanted to be a pirate, and he'll never go back on that again. So he assumes, after this grand gesture, that this is the perfect moment for their first time. Because it's so romantic! And he even goes in with gusto, how sexy!

He's completely blindsided by Ed saying it was a mistake. Because if he went to the lengths of killing a man in cold blood to make absolute certain that he would do anything for this love to work, then Ed saying it was a mistake means that there's no hope of it ever not being a mistake.

And Ed watches Stede change like this, trying to be happy for him because it's not his place to tell him not to be a pirate after everything. And obviously Stede was spooked by the idea of starting new, plain lives, enough that he refused theirs and left his own twice.

And he watches, knowing that he's taught him this way and played a huge role in hardening him, making him lose so much of the softness and beauty that he fell in love with.

Because he can't help but defile beautiful things.