#i can't deal with this rn...
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If there is one more outburst...I will transfer you to a facility that is equipped to handle violent patients. And, believe me, they will be far, far less forgiving.
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i'm making myself laugh thinking about this but I wholeheartedly believe madame morrible absolutely HATES the thought of glinda and elphaba being together like the mere mention of gelphie would probably send her into immediate cardiac arrest and it's not even because she's homophobic or anything I just fully believe she dislikes glinda so so much she's just like this is absolutely NOT happening in my house.
glinda and elphaba are having their gay ass moment and she's like "I sense a disturbance in the force; the wind is telling me those fucking lesbians are at it again."
like IK this woman hates to see glinda's fruity ass coming for several reasons but first and foremost I believe it's because she's so fucking ANNOYED by how much elphaba loves and cares for her, like this pink bitch is throwing a wrench in her plans just by EXISTING and being herself.
and she can't even really do anything to glinda because it'll make elphaba upset and she really can't have that so she just has to sit there and be like
#wicked#wicked 2024#shitpost#my hand slipped oh no#madame morrible#glinda upland#elphaba thropp#gelphie#imagine being her for a second yk#like that scene just before the ballroom scene where elphaba comes to her#asks her to include glinda in their classes#and threatens to QUIT if she doesn't do it right that instant#and you're there like girl wtf???#i thought we hated her why are you up in her ass rn???#do you think she saw whatever sort of horrible homoerotic tension they had going on during loathing#and she was like yk what this is fine i can deal with this im sure this won't lead to anything#and cue elphaba banging on her door at 2am#i would've taken a bottle of aspirin and gone to bed like BYE#can't deal with these damn lesbians again#i just KNOW she was cursing glinda out#also again madame morrible's plan hinged on elphaba being so starved for love and approval she'd do whatever she and the wizard wanted#BUT WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN SHE GETS LOVE AND VALIDATION FROM SOMEWHERE ELSE#LIKE THIS WAS NOT ACCORDING TO PLAN#WHERE DID THE PINK LESBIAN COME FROM???
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EXCUSE ME??? 👁👄👁 (source)
#i'm going back to sleep i can't deal with rhem rn#sleep token#sleep token worship#sleep token iii#sleep token iv#sleep token vessel#vessel#vessel i#vessel iii#vessel iv
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Thinking about Fallen London as a backdrop for the theme of the horror of the inevitable today. I know it's The Classic Cosmic Horror Thing, but it's really woven through all aspects of Neathy life even as the PC is written powerful and capable: the constant backdrop of breath-holding for the Sixth City, the Masters and the Bazaar as a force higher on the Chain with a plan that cares not who it tramples, a ton of the Destinies aside from the LotN ones, literally anything to do with the Dawn Machine, the Flukes...the thing that changes you irrevocably could be around any corner, could drop at any second. Everything else, every other story told, is either dealing with that or written in its shadow. Sometimes the game lets you deal with it by fighting back, with the message that even though you can't hold a candle to all of it, you can change some of it and that's enough reason to try. Sometimes, the game lets you deal with it by getting drunk off your ass with a dozen rats and stealing a painting or something of the sort. Both are honestly such valid ways of dealing with The Cosmic Horror Of It All, as is just rolling out of bed every day and complaining about the weather, and the spread of each that the game's writing has is I think what's made it stick so hard as one of my favourite pieces of horror media despite only about 20% of it reading like horror.
#fallen london#keeping my oc rambling to the tags#part of why i like this theme so much is that when pushed farther it chafes so much with who Hallowrove is#the number 1 way they deal with something unpleasant is through constant acting and momentum#and when it's something too big for them to do that about the number 1 way becomes ignoring and avoidance#but they *can't do that* when the horror is reaching out to touch them and their friends#it forces them to cope by beating their fists against something so massive and inevitable#they can't even contemplate fully what they're doing without the dread setting in#or else freeze in the face of it#i think they've changed though,I've realized today,from being exposed to it#they almost expect the horror now#they're not doing any *less* about it but it's easier for them to accept that it's there in the periphery#and they can look at it almost sidelong now#instead of either ignoring it completely or fixating on it#was rereading some older stuff for them today and it's interesting#seeing how the ways they react are super in character still but i can see the change from now to then#I like horror. i think it tells a lot about a character in a short period of time how they react to that#anyways. uhh don't ask about why I'm thinking about the horror of the uncontrollable rn i am normal and fine i prommy
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The 6 people that are obsessed with Joel
#yeah i can't be bothered to draw anymore then that rn so y'all will have to deal with trying to understand who I've drawn#well i guess not cuz I'm gonna tag then#also don't even say anything about the sausage one. i know.#ya girl was STRUGGLING to make it somehow work#joel smallishbeans#etho slab#jimmy solidarity#firebreathman#mythicalsausage#iskall85#boat boys#smallidarity#does fbm and joel have a duo/ship name??#if so idk what it is#swedishbeans#also ye Joel's there cuz man's the biggest obsessor of himself
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The fact that Wrecker greeted Omega first because Hunter was probably anxiously pacing the ship worried that it wouldn't actually be her... oh I'm a mess
#yes we have the crosshair angst to deal with but i'm just so glad theyr'e back together#i can't spell rn i apologize#tbb hunter#tbb wrecker#tbb omega#the bad batch#the bad batch spoilers#tbb spoilers
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d520bc2e116d6578560d255832879de3/dd0ac7c74079dd87-09/s540x810/ec65c81f99070c03db71bde8f25aa76f717bf8cb.jpg)
#STOP#i can't deal with this rn#luffy sees shanks as a father figure 😭#oda you need to reunite them NOW#also nami demanding him to use honorifics#like “put some respect on my MOTHER'S name”#luffy#monkey d. luffy#shanks#one piece#op#one piece spoilers#op spoilers#op 1138#one piece 1138
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I think I'm in the "conscious incompetence" stage of being a social animal in the real world and it sucks so majorly. bro what do you do after you realize you're bad at socializing and then in-person interaction gets harder because you know you're failing at it now.
#Robin processes emotions on main#I WANT to get good at socializing#I used to be better and I'm now worse >:[#in some ways. in some ways I've improved (e.g. am kinder). but I used to have more confidence and an easier time staying present#now I'm always shutting down and running away#literally I leave the room and go calm down in my room#I want to learn to regulate that impulse and become a chill person to hang out with. but How#I've been struggling lately with punishing myself for running away (not physically but with like. spirals of self-recrimination)#I think one good step would be to get mindful about praising myself for small steps again. I'll change faster if im kinder to myself#also I think seeking reassurance from the people I'm around more often even if it seems silly would be good#ALSO. a major problem I'm facing is that I am living with my parents. and my little sisters. and I don't... I... it's rough.#I used to parent my 15 (then 9) y/o little sister when my parents were gone and I still struggle with feeling Responsible For Her#so every time she's a little cringe I end up feeling like it's my fault and I'm gonna be punished for it and I don't know how to deal with#—how to deal with it#BIG SIGH#I'm TRYING to become a good adult who can help others rather than just living in desperate self-defensive survival mode forever#but it's so hard bro#and another issue is that I'm growing further and further apart from my parents' fundamentalist brand of Christianity#and feeling more and more incapable of making friends and bringing them to visit me. because I have to be perfect around my parents#how can I make friends if I can't offer them hospitality??#how can I be a fully realized adult if I have to hide in plain sight??#I need to move out so bad. even if I'm lonely at first I HAVE to move out#in related news my seasonal job is Over and I'm looking for full-time work! please pray for me if you're the praying type or just#send me encouraging words#that would help#<33333 I will be ok it's just a bad situation rn
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the urge to rewatch torchwood is battling with the pain of actually rewatching torchwood
#torchwood#technically mid rewatch but I have stopped on fragments because I actually can't deal with exit wounds rn#i've been subsiding off janto fic for the past few weeks#can't fucking do this I love them too much not to rewatch#ianto jones#captain jack harkness#jack harkness#owen harper#gwen cooper#toshiko sato
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She couldn't go all the way, either, which is a shame.
#prodigal son#prodigal son fox#prodigalsonedit#malcolm bright#nicholas endicott#1x20#*#i can't deal with this rn
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very tired of being in pain, however, the line between "i chose to be happy" and "i'm gaslighting how i feel" is very thin
#all this “choosing to be happy” feels like bullshit#if being honest#but then if i don't pretend i'd just feel nothing and i don't want that either#it goes into so many things of my life rn and i don't like that#but it's like a surviving thing cuz seriously i can't deal with the pain anymore i'm so done#posting this on 1pm feels wrong when the birds are singing and sun is shining u know#but whatever#barghest barks
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'cause i am not a thief, but you were mine to earn
we all need to understand what this says about stolas. "you were mine to earn"—he's saying that at some point, when he began his quest to win blitz's affections, blitz became his. the prize, the trophy, the gold. blitz's affection was his to gain, he thought, because that's how it went in his fictional worlds—we know stolas likes to read. we know that for a long time, books were his only friends. but do we realize what kind of understanding on relationships that gives him?
he only ever read about whirlwind romance and dashing, rugged bad boys and posh, pretty aristocrats in ravishing love. he read about mystique and romcom love and "don't get on that train, harriet!"
he never read about arguing and rage and feelings of inadequacy and class differences and lines in the sand that were so very difficult to cross.
stolas is naive, and he is ignorant, and he is sheltered. he is brilliant, and caring, and hopeful, and hopeless.
stolas read about grand gestures and forgiveness; he read about grand gestures and blossoming love that shoved away any past grievances—and he believed every word.
this is how he sees the world, and when blitz didn't accept his gesture, he got upset. things didn't go as planned, and he was so confused because blitz was supposed to be the prize, and stolas was supposed to win him.
it wasn't supposed to be like this.
so yeah, he got angry, and he didn't give blitz a moment, and when blitz hurled vitriol at him instead of love and affection that he had expected, he reacted too quickly.
"you were mine to earn"—we can hope this means he's moved beyond that mindset, because blitz was not a prize, nor was he going to dashingly sweep stolas off his feet. and once he undersands that, and blitz has revelations of his own, maybe, finally, they can heal.
(i might write a fic about this, actually)
#helluva boss#helluva boss stolas#helluva boss blitz#helluva boss full moon#helluva boss apology tour#apology tour#full moon#stolitz#stolas helluva boss#blitzo helluva boss#helluva boss stolitz#stolitz breakup#sunnysays#my heart is in tatters#i can't deal with this line it's so fucking sad#i need stolas's worldview to change rn#helluva boss spoilers
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I can't believe I was looking through ao3's search system to find a fic to read before bed. and i see motherfucking ai
bitch proudly has an entire three chapter fic written by ai, put on ao3, and says "Sorry it's ai it might get a little repetitive👉👈"
Like bitch???? I was just trying to find a batfam or isat found family fic and now I have to see this ugly shit
#sorry I;m fucking pissed rn#actually no I'm not sorry#fuck ai#i actually can't fuking deal with this tonight#it's almost two in the goddamn morning#i hate it here#isat#in stars and time#batfam#batman#dcu#ao3#ao3 fanfic#ai is stupid#also#ai is theft#and a plague#and i hate it#fuck people who post shit written by ai to an archive that's meant to preserve works written by PEOPLE#It's too late for this shit man
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Poor William is tired of people making oaths and deals without a second thought of the consequences. Real bummer he's also surrounded by people who barely seem to think once most of the time. 😔😔😔
Inspired by/based on the prompt "William and Lark in Valec's office", sent by our lovely Legendborn anon!
#also ! lineart practice kinda?#and yes I cheated with the hands it's FIIINNNEEE#i do really love all these three characters tho and I bet they are making bets left and right on the love triangle at hand lol#and I KNOW Valec is on our team rn and ofc never would put any of the team through some weird ass deal but like#i like to imagine that William is fully allergic to even the mention of a deal or someone neing indebted to anyone in any capacity hdhdhdj#i can't wait for more willark (or lark in GENERAL) in Oathbound I am STARVED#legendborn#bloodmarked#fanart#my art#william sitterson#larkin douglas#valechaz#comic#also yes I headcanon that Lark has freckles and even if he doesn't I DONT CAAAARREEEE <<<3333
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they are the sweetest 😭😭😭
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d05d4f52b961b5643c5cb48ec1523a23/91e2cf9f7aa3efa3-5c/s640x960/4cf3d583deed2bcd5897a0867bb020092a480b56.jpg)
#nick nelson#I can't deal with Nick's storyline rn it's too relatable lol#charlie spring#heartstopper spoilers#heartstopper#narlie#nick x charlie
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Is this a safe space to say I don't like dragon's rising? Like I watched the first couple of episodes and wasn't too invested in it. Like I see the hype and I think there's some things I like about the series (even though I haven't watched it up to these points) like lloyd having panic attacks, another tournament, and the jaya stuff but the things with the new characters isn't interesting me.
Like they aren't bad and work well for the series I just don't vibe with the new energy of the show.
Like seeing lloyd being called sensei kinda pisses me off. Like it works for his character I just don't care for it.
Also I feel like lloyds relationship with his students also frustrates me cause I don't like seeing lloyd fumble that bad at being a good mentor and I don't like that people see him as a dad to his students cause not everything has to be familial and they can just be teacher student and that's it. (No hate if you make a parental figure I just don't vibe with it)
#My brain- “well mabye you just don't like it cause it's a change from what you know and more specifically a change for lloyds character and-#since you connect with him a lot seeing him change while your currently going through your own difficult changes is triggering you and-#making it hard to use ninjago as an escape.“#Me- “nuh uh”#VENT FROM HERE ON OUT-#Nah because be fr how am I supposed to tell someone with a straight face i can't watch ninjago cause I'm not in a good place mentally to#Like you know your mentally unwell when ninjago of all things is triggering you.#I'm so mentally unstable rn I'm asking for higher doses of my meds to see if it with numb me out and I won't have to deal with this back#and forth on my emotions#Mabye ill just be numb and won't feel anything then I can actually talk about my issues to my therapist until I'm all fixed up and then I-#can lessen my meds so i can start feeling things again after everything's ok.#lego ninjago#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#lloyd garmadon#ninjago lego#vent#vent blog
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