#i can’t quite find a straight answer on google

[fyodior]

im gonna ask a question i absolutely should know the answer to. why does yuuta wear white

[not-neverland06]

Broken Machinery

Pt. 4 (completed series)

Series masterlist

Connor RK800 x fem!reader

A/N: A long one, I wanted some more domestic moments between the two, sue me. Black dahlia’s represent betrayal (or it’s just a nice gift for that emo friend in your life)

Content Warnings: Cussing (duh), body breaking like fine china, shoulders out of sockets (not that bad but I googled a picture of one and it’s gross), overdose (but not really), past death of a child (not reader’s), readers got hair long enough to be in a braid, death of a pot

Word Count: 6.4k

Series Summary: You and your grumpy partner Anderson gain a new addition to the team. He’s supposed to be CyberLife’s best, but there’s something not quite right with his programming, and the problems seem to revolve around you.

Shoulders aren’t supposed to look like that. They’re sure as fuck not supposed to feel like that either. You can’t even lift your arm to peel off your jacket, you don’t have to though, they’re dislocated.

“Y/N!” Calloused hands on your wrist and then all of your body weight is jerked down and hanging from your shoulders, you can feel the moment they rip out of socket, you can’t help the guttural scream that rips its way out of your throat.

The pain from your everywhere is momentarily ignored as you lay in Hank’s lap, sobbing with the relief that you’re still alive. You’re not dead or a paraplegic somewhere in a hospital bed, you’re breathing. You can feel Hank trembling, you’re not sure from what, but he’s silent as he holds you.

You must be going into shock, you can’t really feel anything as he slowly gets you on your feet. You can’t feel your legs moving down the stairwell or him directing you towards the group of patrol cars. One moment you’re on the roof, then you blink, and you’re standing behind an ambulance being looked over by paramedics.

“Cracked ribs, dislocated shoulder,”

Guess it was only the one shoulder, then.

They’re looking you over to assess the damage done. You can just stare blankly down at your sneakers. You’re trying to remember what exactly happened on the roof. But it’s all a blur of adrenaline and primal panic.

He was holding you over the edge, talking to someone. Who?

“Detective! Lieutenant!” Your head shoots up, you ignore the stabbing pain that travels down your spine.

Connor, Connor will save you.

Except he didn’t, he walked away.

He walked away.

You yank your arm free from the paramedic, ignore Hank as he tries to stop you and storm over to Connor. You’d say the look on his face is proud, but you’re not gonna let your heart trick your mind into thinking this plastic son of a bitch can feel anything at all.

“Y/N, I’ve successfully apprehended the deviant.” You’ve still got one good arm. You don’t aim for his face, that won’t do any good, you punch him right in the bio component and watch him crumple to the floor. When hes down you kick your foot into the same spot as hard as fucking possible, ignoring any pain that it brings you.

“Congratu-fucking-lations.”

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY^

It’s been two days and the detective still refuses to acknowledge Connor. He’d tried to explain his reasoning for leaving her in favor of catching the deviant.

FIND Y/N

Connor double checked the door on the hospital room, he could hear Hank and Y/N bickering from inside. “What did the doctors say?” There was a pause before she responded.

“Another day of bed rest,” she sounded reluctant to answer. Connor hadn’t been able to speak with her after the incident on the roof; he'd had to go straight to CyberLife technicians for repairs. She’d done considerable damage to his biocomponent.

Maybe I deserved it.

“Then get your ass back in bed.”

“Hank, please, I’ve suffered a lot worse than this and made it out perfectly fine.”

Hank didn’t sound amused, and there was a loud thud as something landed on sheets. “I don’t care, Y/N! You’re staying right there, it’s not just your fucking physical issues you have to worry about. I’ve never seen you act like that before, I’m worried about what that fall did to your head.” There was a moment of silence and Connor thought it was a smart time to go inside.

There seemed to be a strange, different sort of silence when he walked into the room. Connor wished his hands were free, there were no objectives or dialogue options to pick from as Hank and Y/N both turned towards him. His hands were full, he looked down to the potted black dahlia between them.

He outstretched his hands and moved towards Y/N. She just stared at him from her spot on the bed, unsure of what to do now, he looked to Hank for an order.

The Lieutenant was watching him with crossed arms and an undetermined look on his face.

Connor cleared his throat and placed the flower down on the table near the bed. He scanned her, a minor concussion, two cracked ribs, and one dislocated shoulder. Her heartbeat was increasing the longer he stared, adrenaline and cortisol reaching a level that told him she was very upset about something.

“Your arm seems to be healing at a good pace. You should listen to the Lieutenant, a couple more days rest and you’ll be feeling much better.” The room remained silent and Connor reached up to fix his already perfect tie. There was something odd about him as he felt the stares of his partners. Something inside felt off.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY^

“I’m programmed with psychological software that could help you after recovering from a strong shock.”

SUPPORT

ANALYTICAL

STAY QUIET

Connor immediately knew what he said was the wrong choice.

“A strong shock?” Your voice was quiet enough that he almost didn’t catch what you said, but the room was so deathly still it was impossible for you not to be heard. “A strong shock?” You were quickly gaining in volume. “You left me to fucking die! And for what, for the goddamn android to smash its fucking brains out on the interrogation table before we got anything! I would have died for nothing!”

Connor opened his mouth, prepared to argue his side of the problem, but you cut him off with a quiet question he wasn’t expecting. “What was the chance?”

“Sorry?”

You walked up closer to him and tugged his tie so hard he stumbled into you, you used the shock of the movement to jerk him down lower than you. “The chance of my survival, RK800, what was it?”

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY^

That strange feeling was back, the use of his model instead of his name made him feel wrong.

He shouldn’t be feeling at all.

When he took too long to answer you knocked his legs out from under him and tightened your grip on the tie. “40%,” he tried to keep his voice as quiet as possible but it was clear both you and the liteuant heard him.

You released him like it had burned you to keep holding on to his tie, and the Lieutenant muttered a quiet, “Fucking bastard.” Connor opened his mouth, unsure of what to say, but wanting this feeling to stop and needing the tears forming in the corners of your eyes to go away.

You and the bag you had been packing were gone by the time he had gotten to his feet, Hank stayed behind a moment, gave Connor a long look before following after you. Connor straightened his tie and sleeves and stared at his shoes. He didn’t know what to do.

There was no objective, there was nobody to give him an order. He lifted his eyes to the flower sitting on the table in front of him. Out of the corner of his eye he ignored the way his LED flashed red in a mirror as he reached forwards and grabbed the potted plant.

Connor looked down at his hand and noticed he was holding an umbrella, he was back in the Zen Garden. Amanda was waiting for him on the other side of the bridge.

They walked under the umbrella together. “That deviant seemed to be an intriguing case, a pity it deactivated before you could get any useful information out of it.”

Connor felt the need to defend himself, “Deviants are extremely irrational, which makes it difficult to anticipate their behavior… I should have been more effective.” The last part of his sentence came out without any thought behind it. Like it was an instinct to automatically blame himself, even though no one would know what the deviant could have been planning.

“Did you manage to learn anything?” Connor told her of the strange drawings on the walls, the ones like mazes and the journal that had a strange code inside it. He still had no explanation for rA9 and he could tell Amanda was disappointed.

“You captured the deviant at the cost of your relationship with the detective, have you made any development in that fixing that?”

Connor couldn’t help but think of your face in the hospital room, you were angry yes, but you also seemed . . . Sad.

Connor wasn’t sure if what he was feeling was guilt, but he knew he shouldn’t be feeling anything at all.

“She still hasn’t forgiven me for leaving her to fall. We had an altercation in her hospital room, after the fact and whatever good grace we had developed seems to have been erased.” Connor stopped once he realized Amanda was no longer following.

“We don’t have much time. Deviancy continues to spread, it’s only a matter of time before the media finds out about it. We need to stop this, whatever it takes.”

Connor straightened his shoulders back and looked down at her, “I will solve this investigation, Amanda. I won’t disappoint you.”

“Don’t let relationships get in the way of success, Connor. Improve on them if you can, but remember their lives mean nothing in the grand scheme of your mission.”

“Detective?” Connor knocked on your door again. You lived in a house about fifteen minutes away from the lieutenant’s. He’d attempted to contact Anderson to get your address, he’d hung up every time he’d realized it was Connor calling him. Eventually he just used the information from your personnel file.

Which is how he ended up peering through your windows, trying to catch a glimpse of where you were. Eventually he managed to get a small peak through one of your blinds in the living room. You were asleep on the couch, the TV playing, and there was something in your hand. Connor pressed his face fully against the glass and alarms went through his processors at what he saw.

Pills were spilled on the ground and the bottle was empty in the loose grip of your hand. Connor attempted a scan to see if you were even breathing, but after unsuccessfully trying to wake you up and get your attention he simply broke the glass.

Connor quickly dove through the window and rushed to your side on the couch. He took in your appearance, your mouth was open, barely any breath going in or out. Your lips and nails were discolored and there was a clammy feeling to your skin when Connor pressed his hand to your forehead. He needed to get you awake and alert, first and foremost.

He lightly brought his hand down on your cheek, you shifted but stayed unconscious. “I’m sorry, Y/N, but I need you to wake up.”

He brought his hand down harder and your hand immediately swung out in response. Connors cheek whipped to the left at the force of your slap, it didn’t hurt of course, but it still shocked him.

“What the hell? Connor? Did you just slap me?” Connor looked down at you, extremely confused at your sudden alertness. He couldn’t stop you in time to not notice what he had done to your window. “The fuck? Did you break my goddamn window?” You used his face as an assist in pushing yourself off the couch, his hands went to your hips to stabilize you.

Connor stood as you kneeled down by the broken glass on your ground, swaying slightly. “Shit, I can’t afford to fix this,” you groaned at the sight of the rain pouring into the empty frame. “My things! They’re all getting wet.” Connor walked over and moved anything around the frame to the wall, making sure nothing besides your carpet would get wet. You were silent as you went and retrieved some plastic to cover the window up. Connor wanted to say something to you, but he was unsure what would help the situation.

“Why did you bust in here like the Kool-Aid Man?”

“I thought you had overdosed.” You seemed to finally take in the mess around the couch.

“Oh, crap.” Connor watched you as you picked up the pills and put them back in the bottle, he finished up the window and moved towards where you were sitting on the couch. Your head was in your hands like it was bringing you pain.

Your voice snapped him out of his observation. “You know, for a state of the art android, you’re a real dumbass.” Connor looked down at you, his face must have displayed something he couldn’t identify because you laughed a little.

“My nails look weird because I haven’t finished painting them,” you pointed towards the nail polish bottles on your coffee table. “I haven’t used any chapstick or taken my iron supplements, so there’s lips. And I got tired and fell asleep with the pill bottle in my hand. I was gonna take one for my headache but passed out after I opened the damn thing, which is probably why my head hurts so much.”

Connor was disappointed with himself at everything he had missed, he should have seen all that from the window and not taken such drastic measures. His damage to your domicile had only worsened relations between you. Right now, you hated him worse than Hank.

“You were barely breathing.”

You shot him a deadpan look, “Deep sleeper.” Connor fixed his tie and looked around the house for something to occupy himself with. There was trash everywhere, dirty clothes scattered the ground, and old dished piled in the sink.

“Hey, hey! I don’t need your judgy ass android eyes making me feel bad for my pig sty. Okay?”

“Allow me to help, detective.” Your eyes narrowed, you didn’t seem particularly trusting towards Connor. He couldn't blame you, he’d completely destroyed the small bridge of trust he’d managed to make with both you and the lieutenant. “Your shoulder and ribs are still damaged, I understand it’s difficult to take care of yourself right now. Allow me to help you.”

You laid back down on the couch, and Connor thought you were going to ignore him until you spoke up after a couple of moments of silence. “You’re a detective bot, not a house maid.” You paused before waving your hand through the air. “But sure, whatever, knock yourself out. Just stop fucking standing over me like that.” Connor watched you close your eyes, he continued standing there for a few seconds. You seemed to be faking sleep to try and get him away from you.

At least he finally had an objective he could follow now.

TAKE CARE OF Y/N

He started with the kitchen. Cleaning the takeout boxes off the counter and grabbing any dirty dishes scattered around your home. He stopped when picking some napkins off your coffee table, to check on you. Your breathing had settled and your back was turned towards him. You appeared to actually be asleep this time.

Connor frowned at the position your body was in. You were going to do more harm than good sleeping on your worn down couch. He placed the trash can on the ground and stepped silently towards you. He made sure to be as still and gentle as possible as he slowly rolled you into his arms. You only moved once, to settle your head in his neck.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY^

He ignored the way his thirium pump seemed to move faster and how the blue blood rushes towards his head. It simply wasn’t possible.

Connor went down the hall and to your bedroom on the right. He gently deposited you into your unmade bed and tucked the sheets over your body. He checked your pulse and scanned your body. Everything seems to be working perfectly.

You were just a disturbingly deep sleeper.

On his way out, something shining on the ground caught his eye. He made his way towards your dresser, at the foot of it appeared to be a picture frame. He looked over his shoulder to ensure you were still asleep before he bent down and grabbed it.

You appeared to be around nineteen years old. You were sitting on a roundabout smiling at the camera, your hair done in two French braids. Your arms were wrapped around a young boy around the age of three. He had his hand around your forearms and was making a strange face at the camera with his tongue out. Neither of you seemed aware your picture was being taken at the moment.

The scan confirmed your identity and gave him the identity of the boy.

DECEASED

Anderson, Cole

9/23/2029-10/11/2035.

Y/LN, Y/N

DPD Detective

Other known aliases:

Y/N ANDERSON

Hank had a son, who had died? You both appeared close in this picture. It’s approximately three years before Cole’s death. Could the death of Hank’s son be what caused the drift between the two of you?

Connor heard you shift on the bed and quickly put the picture back down on the floor. He didn’t believe you would appreciate him further investigating your life. Not when you got so upset with him when he simply took a look at your adoption papers.

Connor examined this new piece of information. It was like he was working two cases at once, solving the deviancy problem.

And trying to figure out your unfortunate past with the Lieutenant. Knowing now that the Lieutenant's son had died he could go ahead and assume that’s when your relationship started to go downhill. A year after Cole’s death is when Hank’s divorce became official, according to the papers he not so legally acquired.

The death of a child will often destroy families, if Hank could no longer be a viable partner to his wife, then perhaps he could also no longer be a father to you.

Judging by the Lieutenants drinking habits he didn’t have a healthy view on mental health, or know how to properly deal with grief.

The way you seem to isolate yourself when Connor brings up your past or tries to have a better understanding of your emotional well being, he can also go ahead and come to the conclusion that Hank passed on his unhealthy coping skills to you.

His assumption is proved correct when he comes across a packet of cigarettes buried between the couch cushions. They’re unopened but the plastic surrounding the carton has been picked at. You seem to be trying to stop yourself from giving in to your unhealthy impulses.

Connor frowns down at the box and decides to do you a favor, he throws them in the trash.

Connor continues cleaning up your home while you sleep, attempting to wash and dry your dishes as quietly as possible. The cleaning gives himself something to occupy his mind with, the frantic, buzzing thoughts about deviants and his frustrating partners temporarily quiet while he focuses on one singular task.

PROTECT Y/N

Connor always accomplishes his missions, even if that just means making sure you can wake up to a clean home, or if he has to protect you from self-sabotaging habits.

You wake up to the smell of smoke and a loud blaring alarm.

You’re soaked in a puddle of your own sweat and have no idea where you are or what day it is. Your head shoots up from your pillow at the sound of something crashing onto the floor in your kitchen. You take a second to realize that you’ve been moved to your bed.

Then you remember what woke you up and you’re bolting out of bed. “Jesus Christ,” your kitchen is a smoky haze as you cough on the suffocating smell of something burned. Connor is standing in front of a pan on your stove, simply watching the flames. “Connor!” You grab a lid off the counter and shove him out of the way as you slam it over the pan, suffocating the flames. You quickly grab the metal sheet off the ground and slam it into Connor’s chest. “Quick make sure the sprinklers don’t go off.” Connor runs towards the alarm in the hallway and immediately starts waving it around.

The sight of Connor, the emotionless android who is always calm and collected, frantically running around waving a metal pan in the air, jumping up and down to get closer to the smoke alarm makes you double over in laughter. There’s an ache in your rbis and arm from the force of your laughter, but you don’t care. You haven’t felt this light for years, you haven’t laughed like that in years.

So you allow yourself to bask in the moment, one peaceful moment where you’re not weighed down by anything, except the weight of your own joy.

Connor didn’t hear you laughing until he finally managed to get the alarm quieted. The joints in his shoulders were tired from his wild maneuvering, but it was worth it. This was the first time since you met that his observation of you showed endorphins and a positive change in your body, not one that comes from feelings of negativity.

It felt like something was in his chest, lifting him up and lightening his weight as he watched you.

SOFTWARE INSTABILITY^

Perhaps you did more damage when you attacked him than he originally thought. Your face contorted in pain as you finally raised up from your position. Connor moved before his processors could give him the option to. He tried to be as gentle as possible as he assisted you in standing. He pointedly ignored your protests that you didn’t need help.

You did and you were getting help whether you wanted it or not.

There was still a slight smile on your face as Connor deposited you on the chair next to your table. He moved towards the stove and turned off the burner, dropping the ruined pot in your sink and running water over it, your house still smelled very strongly of burnt food.

He heard a grunt coming from his right, when he turned something inside his head felt strange. LIke he wasn’t okay with what was happening, perhaps humans called this irritation. A concerning thought, but one he ignored in favor of nudging you aside while you failed to open a window.

“Connor-”

The look he shot you when he turned around was enough to get you to sit back down. “Why are you so stubborn? You should not be here alone, you’ve taken too much damage to even do basic household chores.”

You looked around your house and finally noticed all the hard work he had put in. “Holy shit.” There was a look of appreciation on your face until you turned towards Connor. A pout formed on your face and you crossed your arms like a petulant child, “Maybe I wanted the mess. I liked it like that.”

Were you seriously having this argument with him right now? You being difficult for no reason was causing his programming to go haywire. There were red warnings in the corner of his eye telling him he was going to overheat, he dismissed them and stormed towards you.

His hand landed on the table more harshly than he intended, causing you to jump in your seat. “You’re behaving like a child, Y/N, you’re a grown woman act like it! You need my help, there’s nothing wrong with letting me assist you, so just let me help you.” Without consciously activating it the voice he uses during intimidation tactics had been used.

His eyes were drawn down to your thighs, you had them clenched tightly together, your thighs pooling out on the chair below you. Your lips parted slightly as you stared at him. Connor quickly scanned you, your heat level was rising, your heart rate had accelerated and there was an increased level of estrogen and testosterone production. A thermal scan showed an increase of heat in your pelvic area.

ACTIVATE SEXUAL SUBROUTINE?

It wasn’t until the message appeared in front of him and blocked his view of your face did he realize how close he was to you.

This was highly inappropriate. You were injured and still upset with him, there was no need to seduce you.

ACTIVATE SEXUAL SUBROUTINE

He was designed with the intent to complete his mission at any cost. In case there was ever an issue between him and one of his partners and other more illicit methods were needed to gain their support, he was equipped with the capabilities to do so. This wasn’t a situation where methods like that were necessary, so why was there a prompt for it?

Connor backed away from you immediately, it wasn’t right to be taking advantage of your emotional vulnerability. From the corner of his eye he saw you slump back down into your chair. “What-“ you cleared your throat. “What were you even trying to make?”

Connor looked back towards the pot, his hands reached for the coin in his pocket. He needed to do something to get his software back in order. He didn’t turn to look at you, knowing he wouldn’t be able to focus. He thought back to the pasta sauce on your counter. “Spaghetti, for some reason the noodles burned onto the bottom of the pot.” After he was done recalibrating he placed the coin back in his pocket and found it was okay to look at you now.

Your eyes were glued to his hand for a moment before they shot back up to his face. “Burned, to the bottom of the pot? How the hell do you burn water?”

Connor tilted his head to the side, “Water?”

Your mouth dropped open and your eyes widened. “You’re kidding? Tell me you’re kidding.” Connor didn't know how to respond to you so he remained silent. “Oh my god,” you dropped your head into your hands. “You didn’t put water in the pot.”

“Was that required?” You didn’t answer him, instead you stood and walked over to the sink, Connor followed behind you, unsure what you wanted him to do. The both of you stared down into the pot as you lifted the lid, the pasta has blackened at the bottom. Even when you stabbed at it with a knife it wouldn’t come off the pot.

Your, “yeah, it needed water,” was quiet as you went outside and tossed the pot in your trash bin. Connor stood by your opened back door awkwardly, he didn’t feel good at disappointing you and failing his task.

“I apologize Y/N, I failed.”

You snorted, “Big time, how the hell do you not know to put water in the pot?”

Connor looked down at his shoes, “I was not built with cooking capabilities,” he risked a look at you.

You were standing there, just staring at him with your arms crossed before you finally shrugged, “Well then… I guess Barbie’s got you beat.”

“Dammit, Connor, I can feed myself!”

Connor leveled you with a look that allowed for no arguing. “Your dominant arm is dislocated and you refuse to wear your sling, I’m going to assist you.” He pushed the fork against your mouth again and you reluctantly opened your mouth to eat the pancakes he had ordered. This was so humiliating, you were desperate to get him to leave at this point.

After the pot had been destroyed and subsequently disposed of he had ordered some food and you sat down in your living room.

Your entire home was absolutely spotless, when you went to the bathroom you’d noticed he’d mopped the tiles. You were not asleep long enough for him to clean your living room, let alone your whole house.

While you were still against the idea, you could understand why some would prefer android cleaning services to human. You didn’t even want to sit on your couch, afraid of wrinkling the now pristine cousins.

Once you’d sat on your couch, you’d waited for him to leave.

Except, he didn’t, he sat down next to you and then just stopped moving. No blinking, no breathing, just absolute stillness. So, still being pissed at him you’d grabbed a marker off your desk and scribbled some drawings on his face. A heart, random flower, some choice words, nothing too bad. However;

They were staring at you right now as he force fed you.

He’d called a repairman while you had drawn on him, someone would be coming by to fix your window tomorrow, CyberLife would be footing the bill. After he’d made the order for the repair he’d asked what you would like to eat and made a call for the pancakes.

He still hadn’t noticed the drawings, it was a struggle not to choke on your laughter.

You forced a yawn as you pushed his hand away from your mouth, he frowned at the action. “Are you tired, detective?”

“Yeah, I am,” now please get the hell out of my house.

“You should bathe before you go to sleep.” Your head shot towards his, the action hurting your neck. You ignored it in favor of giving him your famous The Fuck Did You Just Say™️ look.

First, he lets you fall off a building and nearly die. Next, he breaks your god damn window and destroys your pot. Now he’s saying you stink. And good grace you held for Connor was gone, obliterated at the comment.

“That’s it Connor. You’ve stayed far past your welcome, I’m done.” Your resolve almost broke at the way Connor’s shoulders slumped. You straightened your shoulders, ignored the pain shooting down your arm, and rebuilt your walls.

You should thank Connor honestly, him letting you nearly die had reminded you of exactly what he was. Nothing more than a plastic soldier that only cared about his mission. You meant nothing to him. Your life was nothing. How could something that could so easily be put into a new body have any idea about death. He couldn’t.

But something that couldn’t die, also couldn’t feel. Those small touches, and the times he would check in on you, it was all manipulation. Just like the way he lied about having a favorite dog, they were all subtle little manipulations to have you as agreeable as possible. And a visceral rage filled you at the thought that he had almost succeeded.

Your heart had almost been his.

You rebuilt your walls and stared him down. “Leave. Now.”

Connor didn’t frown, he didn’t cry or scream at you to let him stay, but the look in his eyes as he stared up at you from his spot on your couch said enough. He looked genuinely hurt at what you said. Not possible.

“You can take your sad little eyes and you can shove them up your ass, Connor. Get the fuck out of my house.” You stormed out of the living room and into your bedroom. He’d cleaned it up and replaced your sheets while you’d waited for the food to arrive.

The lack of your mess made you angrier than it should have. How dare he just come into your house and start acting like he belonged there?

Like he had any right to be near you?

If he could feel pain you would beat him twice as bad as you did after the rooftop incident.

Apparently he’d had to get three parts replaced by CyberLife after what you did. Hank had been complaining about the paperwork the entire time you were in the hospital.

If your arms and ribs weren’t aching you would be pitching a major fit, and ripping the goddamn sheets right off the bed. At the moment, however, the pill Connor had forced you to take was kicking in and making you sluggish.

The only reason you had allowed Connor to stay in the first place was because you were still waking up from your nap. He seemed determined to keep you weak and tired so you couldn’t get rid of him.

You heard footsteps and then a hand was wrapped around your non-injured elbow. “I’m not leaving, detective. Someone in your condition needs assistance.” You turned around in his arms and tried to push him off of you, but he wouldn’t budge. Both of his hands moved to your biceps. The look he gave you made you stop, “Y/N, please, let me help. Please.” He seemed so sad, there was a slump to his shoulders that made him look almost shameful. The tone of his voice made you believe he actually wanted to help, that this wasn’t a part of his programming.

You blamed how easily you gave into him on the drugs.

“Absolutely not!”

Connor was holding your towel in front of him like a shield. “I won’t look, detective, I promise.”

“Hell no! Line drawn! You shall not pass.” He gave you a stern look. Like you should feel dumb for thinking he wanted to see you naked, maybe you were, but you didn’t want any pervy CyberLife techs scanning through his mainframe and seeing footage of you naked. “I’m not gonna let your bosses see me naked.”

Connor seemed to catch onto your train of thought. “I won’t be recording when you’re bathing, I promise we’ll be completely alone.” You crossed your arms, this is one battle he would not be winning. Android or not, your stubbornness was not something to be so easily reckoned with. Connor let out a long sigh, “Fine. You clean yourself, and then we can draw a bath and I’ll assist you with your hair.”

You’d made the mistake of admitting to him that you hadn’t exactly been keeping up with your hygiene while you’d been on the case. You’d been keeping your hair in two braids and have been taking quick showers in between working the case. It was one of your more major flaws. Letting yourself get swept up in the mystery at the expense of your own self-care.

You’d also made the mistake of telling him that it hurt too much to wash your hair, or even attempt to. Now he was insisting on helping you.

Connor looked at your arms and mimicked your posture. “We can stand here all night, detective, I’m not budging.”

You were standing there for two minutes before you realized he was actually being serious. Your chest was starting to ache with the effort of keeping yourself upright. You shifted around and he didn’t even blink. Your skin was starting to buzz with boredom.

After another minute you saw that he wasn’t blinking. Narrowing your eyes and moving closer to his face you waved your hand in front of his face. “Are you serious?” He’d gone into sleep mode, you could tell by the pulsing yellow LED on the side of his face. “Bitch.” And he had ‘coincidentally’ blocked the bathroom exit. Groaning you took the towel in his hands and threw it over his head.

“RK800 wake up.”

Connor’s systems slowly came back online at the sound of your voice. Everything was at 100%, except his optical units didn’t seem to be processing his environment correctly. It took a second before his sensors recognized the fabric of a towel over his head. He sighed and ripped it off his head.

The sight before him had him momentarily stopping. You were in your freshly cleaned tub, bubbles covering your body as you looked at him expectantly. “You wanna help me out or what, sleeping beauty?”

ACTIVATE SEXUAL SUBROUTINES?

SYSTEM OVERHEAT IMMINENT

ACTIVATING COOLING SYSTEM

You looked concerned by the time Connor had managed to calm his sensors, there were parts of him coming online that were not necessary at this moment. He tightened his tie as a poor attempt to get everything back in order. It didn’t work, he was still distracted by your lack of clothes. He could not understand why.

“I’m starting to get creeped out, Connor.” That got Connor’s attention. He never meant to make you uncomfortable.

He moved to sit beside the tub and pulled up his sleeves. “Apologies, detective, my systems were coming back online.” You nodded your head and he hoped you couldn’t see through the lie. Connor used the pitcher beside him to wet your hair and began massaging your scalp as he rubbed the shampoo in.

You moaned as his hands came down to rub your neck. It triggered another cooling process. Much of the rest of your bath was the same, he was struggling with strange impulses that were activating outside his control and programming. When you had leaned your head back on the rim of the tub he’d wanted to press his lips against your stretched neck.

He’d seen humans do it before, but the emotions connected to the act were something Connor wasn’t capable of. He was experiencing what some might call a mental crisis as he helped you wash your hair.

When he was finished, he handed you a towel and went to your room to grab you some pajamas. The picture of you and Cole was facedown on your dresser, moved from the upright position he had placed it in while he had cleaned.

He placed the tank top and shorts you requested on your sink and waited for you in your bedroom. When you walked in you seemed surprised to see him standing by your bed. Your face quickly morphed into one of resignation as you threw your towel on your bed.

Connor made a note to pick it up.

“What now?” He held out the brush in his hands.

“I’ll braid it for you, so you don’t have to worry about styling it with your injured shoulder.” You stopped fidgeting with the end of your shirt and instead gave him a bewildered look. “Is something wrong, detective?”

You cleared your throat before answering, “Nothing it’s- Nevermind.” You sat on your bed with no argument, something Connor was surprised by, considering you seemed to find it necessary to argue with him about everything.

By the second braid you were fully leaning onto his leg, Connor had to keep readjusting so he had room to finish off the braid. The medicine seemed to have fully kicked in, you didn’t make a fuss when he gently guided you under the covers and turned your light off. He knew you were still awake as he made his way to your door.

“Good night, detective.”

He didn’t get a response.

end. — I do not own the characters or the game Detroit: Become Human, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2023. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

[magnetothemagnificent]

I sent you an ask a week or two ago about the new marvel show, Secret Invasion, and possible antisemitism. Did you respond to it and I just can’t find it? Please tag this post as “secret invasion” or “anon ask” or something so I can find it when you respond. Thanks!

Previous anon ask:

I am so sorry, anon, things have been really hectic in my personal life in the past few weeks (past few months, honestly), so I haven't been able to answer many messages, and I have quite a few sitting in my inbox.

I haven't watched Captain Marvel in a long time to be honest, so I had to do some good old googling to refresh my memory on Skrull culture.

It's.......definitely concerning.

This backstory is a classic antisemitic metaphor. Jews as a people have been defined by their exile from their homeland and their "infiltration" of the various countries they were exiled or migrated to. Having faced genocides upon genocides through the centuries, it is true that Jews as a people are adaptable, and have built prosperity and community for themselves even in unforgiving environments. This has made Jews the topic of suspicion for their ability to "blend in" to the population, while also maintaining their own cultural and spiritual integrity as a people. The various European inquistions, blood libels, the Holocaust, and today's dual-loyalty paradigm in regards to Israel are all manifestations of this suspicion of Jews as the outsider. In terms of media and culture, the Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion, the New World Order conspiracy theory, and Q-anon are also manifestations of this belief that Jews are inherently untrustworthy and deceitful, invading other nations and cultures.

It doesn't help that the Skrulls are literally lizard-people, which is a page taken straight of David Icke's ramblings.

Long story short? Yes, absolutely it's an antisemitic trope.

But are we really surprised at this point with the way the MCU has been conducting things?

[id in alt text]

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

two weeks of peak season down, thirteen to go! due to some fortuitously timed cancellations i actually did hit my dream of being a week ahead on prep work (well, at least on answer key making) on tuesday of this past week. it didn’t last long lol (partly due to i was being Insane which seems to have calmed down some knock on wood) but i’ve caught up some more and i’m pretty sure i should be able to get back to a week ahead tomorrow morning while catching up on industry.

this past week i worked about 35 hours, which does remain on the high end for me. i have also tutored every day since last sunday which is not my favorite although both my incredibly far friday night student (i’m talking bay ridge… back to queens that is a commute the length of a feature length movie…) & my saturday kid are taking this week off, which is a huge relief lol. meanwhile the content development side gig continues slowly wrapping up, which is the main reason i am still mostly ignoring everything outside of work i can ignore - i’m basically racing the other active developer for claiming the last few available sets, of which there are 6, although i am not racing very fast because i don’t actually have that much time to work on them and i also am trying not to push my brain into the burnout zone… last fall when i was really actively trying to get on more even financial footing i was very ungenerous about giving my brain time off and it led me to feeling very bad inside all the time for a long while! this year i feel like my goal is really just to get through the season without feeling bad. do what i need to do and not freak out about it, which also entails not putting pressure on myself about things i don’t need to do. perhaps next year my goal will be to do that and also stay in touch with my hobbies and bigger picture goals and such lol. but in the meantime i am being very relaxed with myself about if i want to just read people on reddit talking about john mulaney’s ex-wife’s book everybody hates or whatever, although this week i do want to finish the patrick radden keefe book about human smuggling in chinatown i have on ebook hold.

i played mario kart with some friends & acquaintances this week, i didn’t bail on opening free store even though i kinda wanted to. i have not updated my little habit tracker in A While but i worked out 5 times again this week & hit my step goal; i had to take an extra rest day yesterday due to silent migraine keeping me in sitting jail but today’s was a bodyweight routine so hopefully i can go straight into the one i was set to do tomorrow, since i do really like the friday/sunday rest schedule. i am very stressed about two of my kids’ score trajectories lol but the one whose mom made me do a phone call (why) to be like “yes i have seen students in his position improve no i can’t really promise more than that” just kicked ass on a practice test which was a relief. even though i am spending so much time Highlighting and Content Developing and Admin Doing (my least favorite work task that no one makes me do but me is updating their little homework google docs… but like so often i end a session being like well ok i will see if i can find a worksheet to link you on circle graphs….) i still am actively getting a kick out of my cozy fall routine where i can sleep late and do work in bed while drinking coffee until i’m awake enough to work out. my room is still very messy but it’s literally whatever. if this is the week things start feeling crazy it will only be 13 weeks of craziness which is quite survivable! but also i don’t think it will be (although, like, famous last words, so knock wood!).

[fern-writes-stories]

Miguel O’hara Headcanons

MINORS DNI !!!!!!!!!

♡ [a/n]; I am so fucking unhinged about him. anyways 🧚✨✨

✧ Pairing: Miguel O’hara x reader

✧ Summary: List of relationship headcanons for Miguel my bbg 😔<3 (smut and fluff) > > (tailored towards f! reader)

✧ Warnings: 18+/some NSFW under the cut, second POV, google translate spanish, mentions of oral (f receiving), marking/biting kink, mentions of bondage, mentions of edging, discussion of size kink, discussion of orgasms (f), lmk if I missed any!!!!!!

✑ You can find all my stories here!

✑ My request guide is here (and you can place a request here)!

✑ Like what I write? Consider leaving me a tip here!

-

>> Miguel loooooves using his fangs on you. Nothing too brutal usually; he loves biting your neck, biting your shoulders, biting the insides of your thighs, biting your lips- whatever he can quite literally sink his teeth into.

>> He is very needy when he wants to be and gets touch starved very quickly, especially in his line of work; where Miguel might be away for days (or even weeks) at a time.

>> Although, somehow, he’s still very reserved when you’re in public. Nothing more than brushing your hand with his and giving you dreamy glances.

>> But once the two of you are away from prying eyes he isn’t afraid to kiss your neck or caress your thighs in a casual sense.

>> Miguel is positively crazy about you, and as such wants to make you feel so undeniably good that he will do damn near anything and everything to achieve that and get you to orgasm as many times as possible during sex.

>> For the same reason he loves giving you oral, and would do it for hours if the universe allowed him to. While he’s not stressed about receiving it in return, preferring to pleasure you, he won’t object if you offer it every once and a while. But in the end he’s quite happy to eat you out to your heart’s content.

>> Miguel alwaysss talks you through sex, and though he’ll degrade you if you ask he’s all the more about praising you for everything you do.

>> Especially in Spanish; “Eres mi niña buena, ¿no?” (You’re my good girl, aren’t you?), “Usted está haciendo tan bien, mami,” (You’re doing so well, mami,), etc.

>> Speaking of which, he has an endless supply of Spanish pet names for you. Cariño, mami, hermosa, mi cielo, mi amor, princesa and chiquita to name a few.

>> Definitely has a size kink. Just look at this fucking unit of a guy!!!!!! He loves how small you are when he looms over you in bed, how he can easily caress any part of your body with his calloused hands, how dainty (in his mind) you are compared to him. It makes him feel protective of you, too; like he’s the only person in the entire multiverse capable enough to keep you safe and happy.

>> If you asked him to pick his favourite body part of yours he wouldn’t be able to give a straight answer, he worships your entire body. Your supple breasts, your soft thighs, your sleek shoulders and tender neck, your hands which fit so perfectly entwined in his, and that preciosa (gorgeous) face of yours which he loves to kiss and admire; especially when you’re all hot steamy from sex.

>> He loves an s/o with a bit of chub, too. So much more of your delicious body for him to trail kisses across, run his hands over, to hold when he’s fucking you senseless.

>> Although Miguel loves pleasuring you he doesn’t shy away from teasing and edging, and a lot of the time he insists that you beg for your climax. He can’t help it; he just loves how you look on your knees, pleading for him to finish you off. It drives him mad with lust and you never shy away from such requests.

>> He goes crazy for any and all noises you make during sex and it’s a huge turn on for him. It lets him know how good he’s making you feel and he relishes every moan and squeak- and that fact alone nearly sends him over the edge.

>> He is so unabashedly gentle with you though, especially given his enhanced senses and abilities. There was the odd occasion where he had lost control once or twice and unintentionally roughed you up with his claws- not that you were ever excessively injured.

>> It didn’t matter to Miguel, though, because he would apologise for days and days on end regardless and do everything he could to make up for it, leaving a trail of soft kisses along the mark every day until it was gone.

>> But he’d be lying if he said there weren’t a part of him deep down that secretly enjoyed it- seeing you marked, by him, walking around with physical proof on your body that you were his and his alone.

>> He felt the same about whenever he left hickies or bite marks behind on your skin, drinking in the feeling it gave him like it was a drug.

>> If you ever feel the desire to spice up the sex you two enjoyed, Miguel is more than happy to incorporate his webs as a form of bondage. He adored the way it tied you together below him, wrapped up like a present on Christmas day just for him.

>> On that note, Miguel is never too worried about trying new sex concepts. He is open to every idea, of course, and enjoys the way you will occasionally present a new idea to him. The way you always ask him so shyly makes him want to fuck you right then and there and he laps the sensation up every time.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Tuesday :) Ep been wanting to get to. Anytime we get little more depth to them and Tim as a character I’m a happy girl. I forgot s2 only has 20 not 22 eps HA We’re almost done which is insane to me. Feel like we just started s2. So after this one we have 3 left in this season. What a trip. Let’s delve in shall we?

2x17 Control

Thanks to Nolan our couple starts their day off with some foot patrol. Grey wants them more engaged with the community. Tim lets her know that while he finds foot patrol annoying he agrees this is important to do. That it creates trust and likability therefore they get more help. Lucy seems real impressed with his answer. I always love when Tim impresses Lucy with his insight. Also when she makes sure he knows how enlightened she finds him. She's hot for Tim in these moments haha

Lucy loves when he shows her his moral compass about this stuff. I said it last review Tim as a person is very attractive. It's definitely huge part of her draw to him. A random guy comes up to them asking for legal advice. They stop and address him. Lucy fully expects Tim to answer this man’s question. I’m rolling when he tells this guy they’re movie extras’. Lucy’s double take is too damn funny. How she kept a straight face idk. He’s such a grumpy old man sometimesI love it. Or as Aaron says in s5 he’s like the old dude from 'UP' LMFAO I love you Timothy Bradford haha

Lucy's smile when he tells her they’re not google is too cute. We all know she loves her grump of a man. She’s enjoying him cracking a joke with a side of heart eyes to go with that smile. Look at him cracking jokes. So proud. Their comfortability level at this point is off the charts. His sense of humor is so fun to see. (He cracked me up too. I laugh every time.)This came out all on its own. I love him so easily making one around her. Lucy is quite amused and enjoying it herself.

Side notes I love about this scene. The ever wonderful height difference I legit can’t get enough. How damn in-sync they are as they’re walking together. Honestly the entire scene. Look at them. Lastly a fan favorite the the lack of personal space. Within inches of each other at all times. Like moths drawn to a flame. Always gravitating back to one another. Their physical chemistry without touching always floors me.

We rejoin them still on foot patrol. Lucy asking Tim if Rachel was disappointed she canceled on her last night? Trying to justify to Tim why she ended up bailing on their bar plans. Clearly residual PTSD from Caleb manifesting into her doing this. She’s clearly wanting to be relieved of the guilt she feels for canceling on her.

Tim is usually that person for her with his insight and telling her like it is. Not this time...She doesn’t get the reply she wants unfortunately. Just Tim being a lying liar who lies, when he says they don’t ever talk about her. Ok honey we believe you…I’m sure he actually talks about her more than Rachel would like. Lucy is offended with his cavalier answer LOL

Their convo gets interrupted by a dope stealing Girl Scout cookies. He runs and ends up in someone’s windshield. One of the little girls shows up from the troop to help them. Tells them they can use her scarf and pen as a tourniquet. Even tells Lucy where to apply it. Pretty impressive composure for a kid haha

Tim’s face is my favorite part when she asks if she can get a badge for this? He’s not sure what shocks him more. Her knowing how to do this or asking for a badge for it haha Lucy’s smile back at Tim is pretty cute. I feel like this will be them as parents when their kid does something that shocks them haha

The fire dept. arrives and so does Emmett Lang. Not gonna lie everyone he is smokin. I remember first time I watched this episode, I was thinking holy hell this man is attractive. Lucy deserved someone on this level of hotness to re-enter the dating world with. He is instantly flirty with Lucy. Telling her his condolences for Tim being her T.O. (good thing Tim misses this part ha) Lucy has zero problems flirting right back with him.

Honestly good for her. This is so needed post-Caleb. She’s crashing Jackson’s date plans and canceling on Rachel. She needed something to get her back on her feet. Just like Rachel was the perfect person for Tim post-Isabel. Emmett was for Lucy in the aftermath of 2x11. Girl needed a win and to feel it was ok to re-integrate back into the world of dating. Quite the score to start back up with if I do say so myself ha

They flirt some more at the hospital. Emmett basically asks her out and Lucy panics. Lies says she has something going on. Oh my girl. That PTSD is showing and I can’t blame her. Just hate seeing it affect her. Tim comes up and says it’s time to go. He says bye to Emmett and Lucy makes the connection they know each other. So she leans on her lifeline since she’s having doubts.

Tries to ask Tim about Emmett. Says he seems nice. Trying to get a beat on him through Tim’s eyes. Tim doesn't understand her line of questioning at first. Just giving short answers that give her no depth. He's thinking nothing of it until she gives him that look above. Then he quickly pieces together what this is.

He instantly disengages about it. Telling her 'No.' Not S1 Tim 'I could care less about your life.' disengaged. More 'I don’t trust myself to give you the right advice.' kind of distance. He wants no part of this. Lucy seems so upset he won’t talk to her about this. This scene is funny in how he cuts it off. How upset she seems. The pointing of his finger. Sadly we know the deep kernel of truth he feels to that final line of the scene.

The weight he’s still carrying around about her abduction. He doesn’t trust himself to vet Emmett for her. Since in his mind he failed so spectacularly with Caleb. He’d rather pass that emotional responsibility off to someone else. The weight that’s already on his soul is crushing...he can’t add to the load. Oh my broken boy. I wanna give you the biggest hug.

Lucy breaks my heart when Jackson tells her he needs alone time with Sterling. Lucy realizes she’s a third wheel. Has been for awhile now. She is horrified by this. Luckily Tim saves her with an OT opportunity. Joining the DEA operation Nolan and Harper are running. Lucy instantly jumps on it. She looks so upset walking away from Jackson. My poor girl. I want to give her a hug. I wanna hug them both in this one. This OP was blessing in disguise for her to do though. We get the best part of the episode during the stakeout.

Lucy is "on the phone" with Rachel saying all the things she wishes Tim would engage her on. He’s shaking his head as she rambles on. It’s so funny. Telling “Rachel” she’s been using Jackson and Sterling as a crutch. That together they make the perfect BF. Saying how they’re safe and that's why she keeps choosing them. My heart. Tim interjects 'Who are you talking to? 'Cause he knows it’s not Rachel.

John interrupts asking if they want coffee? He is going on a run. Lucy is her adorable self and asks for a chai tea latte all excited. Tim cuts her off saying this is a stakeout he's not going to Starbucks LOL Lucy rolls her eyes at him. He’s such an ass sometimes but I love him dearly rough edges and all. John is so sweet tells her he’ll see if he can find her some vanilla creamer LMAO

Lucy returns instantly to her fake convo and Tim can’t take it any longer. Has to call her out in the most Tim Bradford way he can. By calling her and proving she isn’t on the phone…Lucy is mortified but answers LOL Poor girl she just wants to talk it out with her person. I’m a lot like Lucy in the way that I need to talk things out. If I don’t they’ll eat me alive. I have a compulsive need to confront things and not let them fester.

It’s good to have that person you can talk it out with. If you don’t you start to self advise and that’s never good. Tim is that for her. Her sounding board. To her she has a problem she reaches for the lifeline that is Tim to sort it out. So him denying her that catharsis is messing with her. Why she created this fake convo. It got his attention so in the end it worked.

What kills me the most with this scene is both their reactions honestly. Lucy for being utterly shocked Tim would think his opinion had lost any value post-Caleb. To her it never ever occurred to place any blame on him. To trust his gut or opinion any less because of her DOD trauma. Breaks my heart Tim doesn’t see this before they have this conversation. That he truly believes his opinion has lost its value in her eyes after Caleb.

Lucy is astonished he would think she doesn't want his POV. She lives for it. Its the most important one in her life. Tim is so very vulnerable with her with his follow up answer. So proud of him for this vulnerability BTW. Nothing scarier than being emotionally exposed with another person. You can see it written all his face. That guard is down. We see the toll this guilt has taken on him. He unburdens his soul to her. Tells what has been eating at him for months.

That his advice pushed her towards something that could’ve ended her life. Since then he has devalued his place in her life. Doesn’t find himself worthy to advise her in personal matters. He fought against it for so long. Then he gave in and Caleb happened. In his mind proving why he never should’ve gotten involved in the first place. Chiding himself for getting close to her and having that closeness which put her in danger.

Lucy truly had no idea the guilt he'd been carrying since 2x11. It’s six episodes later. At the earliest that's 6 weeks at the most its a little over 2 months if we include her recovery time. The latter is the more likely timeline. That’s a long time to be carrying a burden she never placed on him. She can't stand that he's done this to himself. Lucy immediately wants to put him at ease. Trying to offload that burden and chuck it far away. It never once crossed her mind he would take the sole responsibility. Because not for one second did she ever blame him for it.

She vehemently reassures him it wasn’t his fault. He could be told by everyone under the sun it wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t going to stop mentally flogging himself till Lucy forgave him. She is all the things he needs in this moment. Letting him know she thinks it’s ridiculous he would blame himself, that no one had any reason to suspect Caleb for what he was, and overall what happened wasn’t on him. Lucy is taking that weight off his shoulders and throwing it away. Never allowing him to pick it back up again.

He looks so damn relieved and honestly very vulnerable after she absolves him. It helps him start to close a self inflicted wound. Eric the king of facial expressions killing me softly in this scene. His eyes and the way he looks at her when she said wasn’t his fault. *heart clutch* He couldn’t even look at her till she said that. Then when he does he's in awe of her. Like he can't believe she doesn't blame him but is so grateful for her saying as such.

I love her also sharing it wasn’t hers either. It was not at all. (Growth for her too.) Looks like he's biting back his emotions when she lets Tim know how valued his opinion is. It's so sweet. He needed his sunshine human to apply some balm to his wounds. No one does it better than Lucy. She’s complimenting him while also reliving him of the guilt he’s been harboring for much longer than she would’ve liked.

Had she known this she would’ve absolved him the day after honestly. No way she would've wanted him carrying this guilt day in and day out. Her opinion matters so much to him. He NEEDED to hear her say these words. It had to come straight from Lucy or he’d never let it go. She reassured him that not only did she not blame him but his opinion was one that matters most to her. Two things that were in question for him. Quelled the storm in his soul.

It’s scenes like this that are the true building blocks to their foundation. Why they end up working so well in s5. I will die on this hill of loving every single moment of this slow burn. I’m so glad we had 4 seasons to truly make them rock solid. It was so necessary for them as a couple. I don’t regret the wait at all. Because piece by piece they were building toward ‘The Really Beautiful Place’ Lucy calls their relationship in 5x18. Everything happens for a reason for them before we get there. This is just another wonderful facet of it.

The minute he’s granted access and allowance to give her advice he doesn’t hold back. His way of showing he cares too. I love them so much for their ability to just bounce back like they do. After a deeply emotional and vulnerable chat they're right back to the banter. Easily fall back into teasing one another. Tim basically says in not so many words Emmett isn’t good enough for her.(I mean no one is but Tim lets be honest.)

Lucy probes and asks why he thinks that? Tim doesn't hesitate in the slightest. Saying he’s a firefighter for god sakes LMFAO. Clearly has a prejudice against them. For whatever Tim reason that may be. Lucy being all cute saying 'Yeah that’s what makes him so hot.' ha She’s not wrong the man is fine af.

Tim gets defensive and says he doesn’t want to talk about this if she gonna be contrarian about it. Which is Tim speak for being jealous let’s be real honest. Lucy doesn’t hesitate to call him out on it. God I love her. Jokes he’s just threatened by his ‘hunkiness’ I mean he is….his reaction alone proves that he is. It’s ok Tim she still thinks you’re smokin too. She just can’t have you just yet haha

I love them ending this scene on a funny bantery note. Shows how much Tim cares about her. The fact that he is allowing this conversation to even take place proves that. Indulging her in this. They’re so married with their banter. I Iove them sfm. Soulmate behavior the way she teases him about everything and he allows (and loves) it. We leave the scene smiling and laughing at these blissfully unaware idiots in love.

Harper has Lucy and Tim chase what they think is the decoy vehicle once their stakeout is made. They soon realize the decoy vehicle has their target and Nolan’s CI. They end up getting T-Boned in the pursuit of it. Hurts to watch. They're both knocked out cold. I adore how the first thing Tim asks when he comes to is if she’s alright. Always puts her first. The soft way he says ‘Chen’ then asks if she’s ok. It’s the little things I love so very much. ❤️

Emmett arrives on scene flirty as ever with Lucy. She decides to be honest with him. Tells him why she declined his date offer. That her social life is complicated right now. He is smooth af with his reply. Tells her once it’s not he’ll still be interested. Their scene ends pretty cute. This is so good for her. I’m really happy to see her get back out there. She really needed him to help her get over her DOD hump. Just like it’s nice to see Tim happy the same goes for Lucy. I love them both individually as as much as I do together. This cute flirt session is well deserved after all the trauma she’s been through.

Thus ends our episode for them. Such a damn good one for them. I love their building block episodes. They do depth and growth like no other. How I love them so.

Side Notes-Non Chenford

Nice to see Angela get her foot back in the door for Detective. Well earned after her fallout in S1.

Harper SL's and her backstory. Getting to watch her in UC action always fun to watch.

Thank you to those who take the time to like/comment and reblog. Means the world to me. Fuels me to do each review.

See you all in 2x18 :)

[helpforhardcorepets]

Hello I heard you are have a license with hardcore mycts and wonder if you had any experience with caring for a EA Phil

( are mcm a thing? Since mcc are fighting rings )

I see Lem sent you to me lol

So Antarctic Empire breeds are old variants of Philzas, Technoblades and Petes. From my extensive research (I googled it) AE breeds were more common a long time ago due to being bred in a significantly colder climate. However, the area they lived in went through a big heat wave resulting in many of them dying off and nowadays there aren’t many places that are cold enough to keep them long term

They’re an endangered breed with most of them being kept in rescue centers specifically designed to care for them and accommodate for the cold temperature they need to live in. As such, they’re also illegal to keep in many states

However, that doesn’t mean you can’t Ah accidentally keep one for a couple months because you didn’t know they were illegal 😅. I kept an AE Technoblade for a couple months, mainly because I found him in my freezer and didn’t even know it was illegal to keep them in my state lol. Had to send him off to my friend @caterpillarrabies

Technically speaking, you could take care of an AE Philza if you have a very good, spacious and cold freezer. I had one in my garage and took the door off and put a glass door on it in. Gave him plenty of food and water as well as some toys. Made sure to visit him every day and would bring my Kristin to visit him since him and my Philza didn’t get along lol

Professionally speaking, Lem will probably get pissy if I tell someone to break the law so find out first if it’s even legal to keep an AE Philza in your state. If it is, you’ll need a liscene to keep him. If you can AE Philza love the cold and blue clothes. They also like to fly so make sure he has plenty of space to do so. Otherwise they’re quite similar to a regular Philza

As for MCM, that actually led to laws against hardcore breeds being passed at all! You see MCC was and still is very good at staying underground and laying low. MCM, on the other hand, was completely different. It was advertised as a fun Olympics Esque thing that people could bring their MCYTS to with sparring being the main draw. It was seen by the public as a friendly thing to do so loads of people brought their MCYTS out there

However, in actuality the MCM was a giant scam. Loads of MCYTS were taken backstage to prepare and then just…never returned. The poor things were instead experimented on in order to see if hardcore traits could be forcibly brought out. Many MCYTS straight up died from it and only a few managed to gain hardcore traits.

Eventually, the organizers of the MCM were caught and forced to return MCYTS. Naturally, the owners of hardcore MCYTS noticed the difference and this huge scandal brought the hardcore breed to the public eye. This led to petitions and press surrounding it so the government officially made hardcore MCYTS illegal to own.

I’m pretty sure that’s right MCM was way before my time. Sorry this took so long to answer lol

[tutuandscoot]

Hello! Yes Olivia did say that. However, in her retelling of the story (not to say I don’t believe her at all but just that Adrian has not said anything publicly) she asked Adrian many times over the course of the Olympic season whether he would be retiring and he never gave her a straight up answer. He would say something to the effect of I’m not ready to decide or I don’t know. But then right after their free dance at 2022 Worlds, he told her he was retiring. His fiancée Madi H had fully announced it was her last season and if I remember correctly Scott and/or MF and Patch had already discussed options for joining Scott to coach in London at IAMO. So essentially Olivia was blindsided. She’s also quite young still, I think was 24 at the Olympics? And felt that she still had the desire to compete having thought that she would still have some time left in her career. I think some people are skeptical that she didn’t know or more adequately suspect that Adrian would retire. But that’s their business and partnership! She still attended the wedding a few weeks ago in Spain. She took a season off, did dancing on ice and won! And now is paired with Tim D, who previously competed for Germany. I’m happy for her that she’s back! I think she’s super talented so hoping that the partnership goes well. It seems like the desire to return was because of her love for the sport, not in spite of what happened. And like so many athletes, I think there was a strong comedown after the Olympics for Olivia, and that’s tough to deal with so I’m glad she’s back in Montreal and seems to be in a good place. Sorry for the long post, hope that helps :). Just one more thing - Olivia told her story recently on an ice skating podcast. I forget which one but you can take a listen if you’d like - I’m sure it’s pretty easy to find on google.

Thanks for the info!

Yeh so a few things: I really don’t know the ins and outs of ice dance post-VM’s retirement- that’s kind of where my deep interest for the sport ends and yeah I see what’s going on but I don’t follow it, don’t have any particular interest in any teams. I’ve only really watched S/D in the VM era (and at the 22 olys) and they were obviously very good but as I said I didn’t really take interest in general so nothing against them specifically. Through watching lots of stuff I learned he and madi were together and in seeing the age difference of him and olivia it would make sense he was getting towards retirement age/life direction with madi already confirming such.

In saying I dont really have an interest in them or ID specifically, I’m certainly not holding anything against her for getting a new partner/anything that was said publicly regarding retiring/splitting/who blindsided who- as you said it’s none of anyones business.

It was just that I happened to see that clip from TSL of her saying.. what I said in the initial post about not getting a new partner (and of course things can change and that should not be held against anyone because it’s their business).

Inevitably everything with me and this blog comes back to VM bc that’s where my heart and interest is.. so I just always find it interesting in looking at other teams/the ID landscape/seeing how things work- teams splitting up/retiring/new ones forming.. and I can’t help but go back to VM and their loyalty to each other.. their partnership just so clearly means everything to them and they legitimately view skating with anyone else as.. a kind of cheating on each other and it would just never happen (proven through literally everything they’ve ever said and done throughout their partnership and continue to). This is not too say S/D partnership wasn’t meaningful and special.. just not in the way VM’s is.

Obviously their situation was different to a team like S/D: coming from different counties, big age gap, other life things pulling them in different directions. I don’t judge Olivia at all. Was just purely a comment on what I had heard said.

Thanks so much for clarifying anon! (And for being nice and level headed about it as I’m sure there are plenty putting blame/hating on either of them).

Also while we’re discussing new partnerships.. did Haley and Nick (S/W) break up.. I thought I read she was looking for a new partner..? As I said I really don’t actively keep track.. just something I saw (and just to throw in my own two cents.. I really dont/didn’t see them getting above the level they’ve been at for a while- NOT a knock against Scott and his coaching- just their skill level and even with the best coach in the world, some just reach their limit..and in a tough country to compete internally like canada.. makes sense why S/F went to Ireland).

[tickledpink31]

What would the nezumis masquerade get ups look like? And what about the masks?! I can’t believe an event based on the hunchback movie is coming!

This is super late. I'm so sorry. I was thinking about Glorious Masquerade outfit ideas then I got this in my inbox. So, why not combine what I've been making and use it to answer this ask.

God, I wish I could draw better. Yana's intricate design for clothes makes me lose my sanity. Btw I only had the energy to make Minako's outfits. I hope these suffice.

Character theming is everything. Minako's colour motifs are black and white and the character she's twisted from is Mickey Mouse. That's what I have to work with. Also, medieval silhouettes aren't my favourite thing in the world, and it was actually pretty hard for me to find information of French fashion during the 1480s. I had to take inspirations from Renaissance fashion instead.

Looking at various references, wide v-necks paired with squared-collar kirtles underneath were quite popular with women in the 15th century.

Then for headdresses, I was introduced to the good, the bad, and the ugly. I thought about using an escoffion, a double-horned headwear, but it just didn't sit well with my vision:

I also thought about giving Minako a tiara, but I found that it wasn't extravagant enough to go with the outfits

I drew this headwear called a beaded snood because the other headwears were not great at displaying Minako's space buns in particular. Unfortunately, I scrapped the snood because it was way too complicated to draw again. The effort was not worth it.

I ended up liking the padded roll headdress and the hennin in the end. We'll get back to that later.

I experimented with the black-and-white colour scheme at first with outfits 1 and 2. Furthermore, I decided that the dress would look better with gold accents because too much black would make it look like a funeral attire and too much white would make it look like she was the bride of a wedding.

#1 has a fur lining and I just used transparent pngs from google images to make the patterns

#2 and #3 have puffed sleeves and patterns that I drew myself. The patterns were actually moderately easy to draw despite how complex it looks. I think the silhouettes look much better because of the puffed sleeves.

Overall, I prefer #2 and #3 more over #1.

For #2 I've decided to pair it with the padded roll (I think that's what it's called)

#3 is pretty much #2 recoloured to look like Mickey's wizard robes from Fantasia. (Is it just me, or does the gown look a little like the American flag. Red and blue are hard to pair together).

Personally, I don't enjoy dabbling with Mickey's robes as inspirations for Minako's outfits. I just don't vibe with them, but the Masquerade event gave me the perfect opportunity to try!

I've decided to pair the gown with this cone-shaped headdress is called a hennin. You've probably seen them worn by princess characters in children's media. I wanted to give the hennin a galaxy theme. I hope the stars and moon are visible enough on the veil.

Finally, I only want one mask, and it's this:

It will be coloured soon, I swear.

I at first wanted to go for a straight animal motif mask, but that wasn't working me.

So, we're down to two, and I think they turned out pretty great. I got rid of the pearls on the v-neck not because I forgot it after through copying and pasting the same position. Ha ha ha...

Personally, I like the black and white colour scheme more, but I'd like other people's thoughts too. What do you all think?

[handsomelyhiddleston]

Smitten - Tom Hiddleston x Curvy Reader

Filming sex scenes wasn’t the easiest task. There are weird nude undergarments or socks or tape or sometimes just a nude co-star…With Tom, though? There were nerves and feelings and a deep down hope that he couldn’t tell that you were incredibly turned on as he mimed fucking you twelve ways to Sunday.

“Cut! That’s a wrap on today. Great work guys!” the director called.

Tom collapsed onto your chest, laughing as the tension left his body. “These never get easier.”

“I don’t know” you teased, playing with his hair as everyone left the set so you two could leave the bed with some of your dignity. “It’s a lot easier with you.”

Tom held himself up on his elbows. “Don’t tell me your past romantic co-stars have been less than gentlemanly.”

“Not all of them.” You shrugged. Being a ‘larger than the Hollywood standard’ actress had put you in some…not very flattering roles in the start of your career. Sure, now you were the romantic lead with a conventionally attractive male actor, but lets just say you’ve dealt with a lot to get here.

“Well, I hope you know you deserved better.” Tom kissed the back of one of your hands, rolling off of you.

“Coming from you, I may actually believe it.” You laughed, gathering the sheet around you as you left the bed, grabbed your robe, and started walking towards your trailer.

The two of you filmed the movie…Where you’d usually fall asleep in one of your two trailers watching other movies…

The two of you attended interviews…Where Tom would almost always defer to you and even stuck up for you when a few interviewers were borderline sexist or would comment on your appearance…

The two of you even walked a few red carpets together…Tom’s hand always placed at your middle or  on your hip or in one of your hands...

He invited you out to eat with him before or after any shindig the two of you went to…

He’d walk you to your hotel rooms with kisses left on your cheeks…

He’d even tried to convince you to spend the week before the premiere in London with him…

In your mind, Tom was just too nice. He was nice to everybody. It all seemed very friendly…Until…

You hadn’t been watching the interviews as they’d been posted. Some interviews you did together with Tom and others you’d been split up and put with other actors from the movie.

Your phone pinged…

*best friend* - HAVE YOU SEEN TOM ON FALLON?!?

Before you could reply, your phone started blowing up.

You scrolled through the texts until you saw Tom’s

Tom – Darling, I hope you know how much you mean to me. Regardless of what your answer is, I’d never want to lose your friendship. It’s not every day you get to work with one so incredibly kind and thoughtful and talented and beautiful and…every moment I’ve spent with you has been a privilege. Please put me out of my misery and let me know you’ll at least let me see you again.

“What the fuck?” you asked yourself, opening your laptop and googling “Tom Hiddleston and Jimmy Fallon”

You saw that the Fallon YouTube channel had just posted Tom’s segment of tonight’s episode…

“How are you doing, buddy?” Fallon asked, pulling Tom into a tight hug.

“I’m doing incredibly well at the moment, actually.” Tom answered, sharing that the movie you two had filmed together had done extremely well on its opening weekend just a few days earlier.

“I know! It was amazing. I’ve seen it twice!” Fallon replied, always enthusiastic.

“I’m so glad you liked it. Y/n is incredible, right?” Tom turned to the audience, loving that they cheered when he brought you up.

“Oh my god, you two are so good together. I kind of thought maybe you two were…you know…” Fallon waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Tom threw his head back laughing, fidgeting with his tie and avoiding looking into the audience.

“Come on, you can’t tell me you two don’t have SOME sort of real chemistry. I saw the movie.” Fallon gave Tom a look like *Don’t lie*

“Well, perhaps we’re just incredible actors and you’re simply complimenting our craft.” Tom shrugged, trying to look anywhere but at Jimmy.

“Well, yes. The acting in the movie is amazing, but I don’t think that accounts for this.” Jimmy turned and pointed to the screen. It was a series of clips pulled from Tom’s interviews where all he did was gush about you.

“I missed being home, but it’s hard for anyone to stay upset when they’re around Y/n. She just lifts the mood in any room she’s in. You could say she makes anywhere feel a bit like home.” Tom had answered when a woman asked him if it was hard being on site away from home for 5 months.

When another interviewer asked Tom what his favorite line in the movie was, he answered, quoting one of your lines. “When she delivered it for the first time, it kind of took my breath away. I felt very unprofessional. I had to apologize and ask to start over. I couldn’t remember what I was supposed to say next. She tends to have that effect on me.” Tom laughed, a slight blush on his cheeks.

The final clip was one of an interviewer simply asking Tom how his day had gone. “I feel all out of sorts, if I’m being honest. Y/n isn’t here today because she woke up not feeling the best and with Covid still being an issue, she didn’t want to risk getting anyone else sick.” Tom answered with a sad smile on his face. When the interviewer shared that they hoped you would be okay and feel better soon, Tom answered with “I’ll make sure to pass on your sentiments when I bring her food later on.”

“COME ON!” Fallon laughed, throwing his arms up.

“I know, I know. I’m not very good at hiding how I feel, I guess.” Tom admitted, leaning back against the couch and laying his arm across the top. The crowd went wild.

“So, you admit it! Are you two together?!” Fallon asked, sitting on the edge of his seat.

“Unfortunately, not.” Tom answered, ducking his head as his cheeks flushed.

“Why?!” Jimmy asked. “You’re clearly smitten!”

“Hey, it’s not my fault!” Tom rebutted, looking to the audience for support. “I’ve tried!”

“Aww, now I feel bad for bringing it up.” Fallon chuckled and looked at the audience as they collectively ‘aww’ed. “How could anyone turn down this?!” He gestured towards Tom as the audience cheered.

“Well, if I’m to be completely honest I guess I haven’t actually TOLD her how I feel.” Tom confessed.

“Wait, what do you mean?” Jimmy paused.

“Well, I thought she’d catch on. I assume she has.” Tom laughed, fidgeting in his seat. “I’m pretty sure everyone else that knows the two of us can tell I’ve fallen completely head over heels for her.”

“Tom, Tom, Tom.” Jimmy shook his head.

“What?” Tom asked, nervous about what the answer would be.

“I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but I think you may just be horrible at flirting.” Fallon said with a straight face, the audience busting up laughing after.

“Do you think?” Tom replied, eyes gone wide in exaggerated surprise.

“I mean, I think you’re just so nice.” Jimmy laughed, trying to stay serious…“that everyone thinks you’re flirting with them…Which means, when you’re trying to flirt it just blends in.”  

“Well, how would you suggest I stand out then?” Tom asked, putting his elbow on his knee and leaning his chin on his fist like he was really paying attention.

“I mean…” Fallon slowly pointed towards the camera. “You gotta shoot your shot, right?”

The audience went wild at the suggestion. “Oh, dear.”

“I can scrap this and we can just talk about the movie.” Jimmy offered, making sure Tom knew that none of this had to go on the air.

“I mean, if it’s truly that obvious to everyone what have I got to lose, right?” Tom answered.

“That’s what we like to hear!” Jimmy cheered with the audience.

“Well…Y/n.” Tom paused, a soft smile on his face. “I don’t quite know where to start. I feel as though I may have been remiss by not just telling you how I feel. The consequence of such is that now I’m doing it in front of all of these people *gestures to the audience*…and I’m sure you’re laughing at how red I’ve gone and how flustered I am so I’m going to get to the point. Darling, you’re an incredible woman. I could list a million reasons why, but hopefully later you’ll give me the time to tell you them in person. What I really want to tell you now is that you make me happy. You inspire me. You make me want to be the best version of myself and you even make me believe I can achieve it. I’d be honored if you’d give me a chance.”

Fallon had tears in his eyes and most of the audience did, as well. “I…That was so beautiful. I think we need to go to a commercial break.” He was all choked up and stood to give Tom a hug.

You pulled up Tom’s text, your fingers hovering over the keyboard. “Are you still in New York?” you text him. The two of you were there for interviews. You were even staying in the same hotel.

“I am.” He text back, but the ‘typing’ bubble stayed. “Did you watch it?”

“I did.” You answered. “Come over?”

You saw the ‘typing’ bubble pop up and then disappear a few times. Instead of a text, you heard a knock at your hotel door.

“So?” Tom asked when you opened the door. He looked nervous, a look you didn’t often see from him. He had his glasses on and his hair was an adorable mess. He was even already dressed in his night clothes.

You didn’t answer. Instead, you stepped forward and placed your hands on each side of his face, pulling his lips gently to yours. He quickly reciprocated, his hands finding your hips as he walked you backwards into your hotel room.

“And to think, I could have been doing that for a whole year already.” You teased him, connecting your lips again.

“Don’t worry, my sweet.” Tom answered, pressing kisses across your cheek and down your neck. His lips paused at the shell of your ear and his voice dropped. “It just means we’ve got a lot of catching up to do.”

[afro-elf]

Can you elaborate on antisemitism within Dracula and such? I love vampires in media but I can’t continue to enjoy them if I feel they are blatantly antisemetic.

disclaimer! i am not a jewish person, i just have a ba in english and have written and read about vampires a lot, specifically i’ve written and read about dracula like four times in my academic career because every time i read that book i find something new to talk about. if you want actual answers about antisemitism you need to ask a (willing! do not use marginalized people as google) jewish person, they are the experts on their own persecution and i have merely read books and watched documentaries and spoken to people about it

i’m not gonna tell you to cut vampires cold turkey because that doesn’t feel especially nuanced and vampires are their own genre with a variety of lore, tropes, visuals, and what-not to choose from and i think it would be disrespectful to any jewish creators who have created vampire media (what we do in the shadows) to say “throw the whole thing out!”. just like how i would never tell you to completely stop consuming cosmic horror because the architect of the genre had worms for brains since there’s like a huge movement of writers of color and/or jewish writers and/or irish writers taking worms for brains’s ideas and making them good and not shitty. everyone knows i’m a slut for vampires, right? what’s not to love? however, the complicated thing about horror is that it doesn’t exist in a vacuum. most monsters are never just monsters but representations of something else whether it be a fear, a concept, or a people group. monsters, in the hands of the white horror “masters” often just meant anyone who wasn’t a straight white man, and in dracula that’s especially emphasized

in my thesis project which was mostly on jordan peele’s masterpiece get out, i asserted that the vampire, because it’s an idea that has existed in some form in cultures scattered throughout history, can represent different things at different times. just as zombies or cannibalistic monsters can represent everything from lust to capitalism to the poor, vampires can represent everything from lust to capitalism to the jewish people. vampires, in the hands of the antisemite, are especially violent symbols because often vampires are seen feeding off of innocent white women clothed in white living in civilized white western cities and towns or innocent white children clothed in white living in civilized white western cities and towns and well.... that’s blood libel

this is, like, a broad oversimplification of my own months of research and analysis work but stoker specifically ran right into antisemitism with the portion about dracula coming from transylvania to britain to kill a bunch of white hoes and “spread the vampire curse” when quite a few of the immigrants to britain at the time from that region were jewish folk fleeing pogroms. stoker also has it so that when she’s turned, sweet innocent white queen lucy’s hair turns dark and her eyes look like the devil’s and also there’s the fact that christian imagery repels dracula like there’s a lot to unpack here but basically what you need to know is that while stoker gave the vampire genre a lot to work with, so much of the imagery in his novel is, um, gross at best  and built from victorian racial science and fear of the other and the fact that it became the standard for what we know as the modern vampire is uncomfortable but necessary to recognize so that we can figure out what to do about it

basically, we have to ask ourselves re: monsters, what is this text emphasizing about this monster? what makes this monster monstrous exactly? it’s what you have to ask about king kong and evil aliens with “dreads” and the hillbilly cannibal trope like you have to ask “WHY is this scary?”. you might not like the answer most days, but that’s okay because if you’re a writer like me you can attempt to re-wire these monsters to be powerful, subversive, and respectful to those who have historically been disrespected by horror. like it is possible to create a vampire that isn’t an antisemitic stereotype but it takes a lot of research, honest questions, hard work, and research

[yasminbenoit]

What Is Asexuality? Yasmin Benoit for Teen Vogue

For Asexuality Awareness Week, model Yasmin Benoit answers the question ‘what is asexuality’, and busts some common myths about what it means to be asexual.

I realized I was asexual around the same time my peers seemed to realize that they were not. Once the hormones kicked in, so did a nearly universal interest in sex for those around me. I thought sex was intriguing, but never so much that I wanted to express my sexuality with someone else. I had no sexual desire towards other people, I did not experience sexual attraction, and that hasn't changed.

I didn't learn that there was a word for my sexuality until I was 15, after being interrogated for the millionth time at school about my orientation, or lack of it. After doing some Googling as soon as I got home, I realized for the first time in my life that I might not be broken, that I wasn't alone in my experience, and that it wasn't a defect I had somehow brought on myself. I had spent the entirety of my adolescent life trying to answer people's invasive questions without having the language to explain that I was just an asexual girl.

But even after I found the language, I had only solved half of the problem. We are taught in grade school that we'll become sexually interested in others, but never that not being sexually attracted to anyone is an option. Because we're not taught about it, no one else knew what I was talking about when I tried to come out to them as asexual.

Many don't believe asexuality is real,  and that makes the experience of navigating our heteronormative, hyper-sexualized society as an asexual person even harder. I've spent my life battling misconceptions about it and so have many other asexual people. Now, I try to use my work as a model and activist to raise awareness and change the way our society perceives asexuality and asexual people. This Asexual Awareness Week, I'm busting some of those myths about my orientation.

Now, let's separate fact from fiction:

Myth: Asexual people have no sexuality ✘

Truth: Asexuality is considered a sexuality, just like bisexuality, heterosexuality, and homosexuality. I often phrase it as being a sexual orientation where your sexuality isn’t oriented anywhere—because it isn't actually the same as having no sexuality or sexual feelings. Asexual people have hormones like everyone else. It isn’t uncommon for asexual people to masturbate and there are asexual people who still have sex for various reasons and gain enjoyment from it. Some asexual people are romantically attracted to others, but not sexually attracted. Since asexuality is a spectrum, the ways in which asexuality is experienced can vary in different ways.

Myth: Asexuality is a lifestyle choice ✘

Truth: This misconception stems from the idea that asexuality is a choice and not a legitimate sexual orientation. Asexuality is often confused with celibacy or abstinence, probably because they can manifest in similar ways. In contemporary society, celibacy is often defined as being sexually abstinent, often for religious reasons. Sure, for many asexual people, their asexuality means that they aren’t interested in having sex with other people, but that’s a result of their orientation—not their beliefs about sexual behavior. Celibacy is a lifestyle choice, asexuality is not. Asexuality also shouldn't be confused with being an incel. People don't decide to become asexual because they can't find sexual partners or because of any other circumstances. It isn't a state of being when you're going through a "dry spell," nor is it a choice any more than being gay or straight is a choice. It's just the way we are.\

Myth: Asexuality is an illness ✘

Truth: The assertion that asexuality is a mental or physical disorder is incredibly harmful to asexual people and has led to false diagnoses, unnecessary medication, and attempts at converting asexual people. For example, Female Sexual Interest/Arousal Disorder and Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder — which are characterized by low or absent sex drive — are in the DSM-5 and have been thought of as a medical diagnosis for asexuality. But the difference is that people who have HSDD are bothered by their lack of sexual drive, while asexual people are not. But even the inclusion of HSDD as a diagnosis is controversial — some argue that people who are asexual might feel distress at their lack of sexual desire because of lack of acceptance in society. Asexuality is not the result of a hormone deficiency, or a syndrome, or a physical or psychological ailment. Research has said as much. We don't need to be treated or fixed.

Myth: Asexual people have anti-sex attitudes ✘

Truth: There are asexual people who are repulsed by the thought of sex, or by the thought of having sex themselves. I fall into the latter category. However, that feeling does not necessarily extend to what other people are doing. The misconception that asexual people are against other people expressing their sexuality, and that all asexual people can’t stomach conversations about sex, is quite an alienating one. It leads to asexual people being left out of important discussions about sexuality. It is entirely possible and incredibly common to have sex-positive attitudes and be asexual.

Myth: There are barely any asexual people ✘

Truth: Don't let our lack of visibility and representation fool you. There are a lot of asexual people out there, but many of us aren't entirely out, and some haven't realized that there's a word for what they're experiencing due to that lack of visibility. While research into the asexual population is lacking, its estimated that around 1% of the population is asexual—but that's based on a studies where the participants have likely known what asexuality was and been out enough to identify that way. It's likely there are more asexual people than we know of, but even if we did only comprise 1% of the population, that's still tens of millions of asexual people.

Myth: Asexual people just haven’t found the right person yet ✘

Truth: The idea that asexual people just need to meet the ‘right person’ who will unlock their sexual desire and ‘fix’ their asexuality is one I’ve always found quite perplexing. It’s an argument that seems to be applied to asexuality more than other orientations. You wouldn’t tell a straight guy that they just “hadn’t met the right man yet" as an explanation of why he's attracted to women. I’d like to think that most wouldn’t tell a gay man that they “hadn’t met the right woman yet” either. It suggests that our sexuality is reflective of our company, that no one we have ever seen or encountered has met our standards, and thus we haven’t experienced sexual attraction to the extent that the term ‘asexual’ could be applied.

This assumption ignores and invalidates all of the asexual people who have found the ‘right’ person—the asexual people in happy, fulfilling, loving relationships or who have had them in the past. Because, yes, asexual people can still have romantic relationships, or any other kind of relationship. The validity of a relationship is not and should not be based on how sexually attracted you are to that person. This statement also plays into the notion that asexual people are “missing out” on something and haven’t truly discovered our entire selves, that we are incomplete because of our innate characteristics or our life experiences. This isn’t true either.\

Myth: There’s an asexual demographic ✘

Truth: Even though most people don’t know much about asexuality, they still have quite a specific idea about what asexual people are like. I’ve often heard that, as a black woman and a model, I don’t look or seem asexual. We’re stereotyped as being awkward white kids who spend too much time on social media and probably aren’t attractive enough to find a sexual partner if we wanted to. And if we are attractive enough, then we should tone that down as not to ‘give mixed signals.’ But there is no asexual way to look or dress. Asexual people have varying ages, backgrounds, interests, appearances, and experiences, just like those belonging to any other sexual orientation. So please don't use the term "asexual" as an adjective to describe someone you think is sexually unappealing or as an insult, because that's only perpetuating this harmful stereotype.

Makeup: Margherita Lascala

Photography: Becky Gannon

Hair: Kayla Idowu

Styling: Diesel, Cheimsee, Sixth June, Northskull, Lamoda

[babygirl-diaz]

Samtember 23: Happy Birthday

2193 Words | Rated G | For @samwilsonfest

Sam felt like he was missing something when he woke up this morning. But he shrugged it off, thinking that if it was important, it would come to him eventually. So he went on his usual run, came back home to shower, make himself coffee before heading out to the base to train Joaquin. All the while, he kept getting the sense that he was forgetting something important.

As he flew up in the air with Joaquin behind him, he heard the younger man's voice in his ear...

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear Sam. Happy birthday to you," he sang. "Sam, get to the ground, I want to show you something."

"Show me what?" Sam asked.

"Can't tell you, man. It's a surprise."

Sam rolled his eyes behind his goggles and dove towards the ground. When he got to his feet, he looked around and found a couple of guys from the air force standing around, looking up at the sky. Curious, Sam looked up too, and his eyes widened. Joaquin had written "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SAM," in the sky.

"Happy birthday, Sam."

"Happy birthday, Cap."

The air force guys wished him.

When Joaquin got back to the ground, he gave Sam a broad smile and pulled him into a hug, much to Sam's surprise. "Happy birthday, Cap!"

"Thanks, man," Sam awkwardly pat him on the back.

"Wanna get lunch? My treat," said Joaquin.

Sam contemplated the offer. He didn't have to do anything for the rest of the day and he was far from home, so it would be nice not to spend his birthday alone.

"Okay."

They ended up at a bar, although it was only 1 PM. After a cheeseburger, a couple of beers, and a great conversation with Joaquin, Sam was a happy camper. Once they finished lunch, Joaquin headed to the bathroom, giving Sam time to finally look at his phone.

"Shit," he hissed when he realized he had 20 missed calls from Sarah as well as 5 messages asking him to call her back.

Figuring that Sarah must want to wish him on his birthday, he called her back.

"Sam! Where have you been? I've been trying to reach you all morning!"

"Hello to you too, sis," Sam chuckled. "Sorry, I was a little busy--"

"Sam, I need you to come home."

Sam sat up straight, the buzz of the beer immediately wearing off when he heard the worry in his sister's voice. "What's wrong?"

"Can't tell you that over the phone. Could you please just come back today?"

"I- I can't drive. I've been drinking."

"It's only 2 PM there! Can't you catch a flight? I'll pick you up from New Orleans."

"Okay," Sam replied. "Yeah, okay, I'll be there. Whatever this is, can't it wait till tomorrow?"

"No, it's really urgent, Sam. I'm kinda in a whole lotta trouble."

"Shit, Sarah. What did you do?" Sam rubbed his forehead.

"Just get here!" Sarah said before hanging up.

"Everything okay?"

Sam looked up to find Joaquin giving him a concerned look.

"It's my sister. She's in some kinda trouble. She needs me home right away."

"Damn," said Joaquin. "What you gonna do now?"

"Head home." Sam sighed as he looked up flights on Google.

"You driving?" Joaquin asked.

"Been drinking, Joaquin. Can't drive," Sam replied, although he felt much sober now.

"I could drive you! A road trip will be nice!"

"You've been drinking too, buddy," Sam reminded him. Joaquin looked visibly disappointed, but he nodded. Sam booked the flight and got up from his seat. "Thanks for lunch, man. This was great. Let's catch up when I get back."

With that, he gave Joaquin a quick hug before heading back to his apartment to pack.

***

On the plane, Sam tried to relax but he couldn’t.

“You alright there?” Sam’s neighbor asked.

Sam tried not to groan. So the person beside him was a talker. “Yeah, I’m good,” Sam replied and finally looked over at the person. He had to do a double-take because the guy looked so much like Steve. But that wasn’t all. Sam had actually seen him somewhere before.

“Wait… Don’t I know you?” Both the guy and Sam asked at the same time. The guy laughed and shook his head.

“I’m Toby,” he introduced himself.

“You’re the guy that plays Steve Rogers on the Broadway show…” Sam trailed off. Sam felt a pang in his heart as he continued to watch the guy.

“Yeah and you’re the real Captain America,” the guy -Toby- said, giving him a smile. “Sorry, this must be really weird,” he continued.

“You have no idea.” Sam laughed humorlessly and shook his head.

“Can I ask you something?” Toby asked.

“No, he was a terrible singer,” Sam replied.

Toby looked confused for a second before he burst out laughing. “You a mind reader too, huh? Is that your superpower?”

“I wish,” Sam scoffed. “No, but really, what was your question?”

“Is he on the moon?” A smirk spread across Toby’s lips.

“Yeah, he’s totally on the moon. Just chilling up there. I actually fly up there every uh-- Monday and Thursday and we hang out.” Sam rolled his eyes.

That made Toby laugh even more. “Man, you’re hilarious,” as his laughter died down, a serious look spread across his face, “Can I make this even weirder?” He asked.

Sam raised an eyebrow at him but didn’t reply.

“Happy birthday,” said Toby.

“How did you--”

“I follow you. Quite extensively,” Toby replied, visibly cringing. “I am kind of a huge fanboy.”

Sam blinked at him and tried to find the right words. He was flattered… but also weirded out.

“And now you look like you’re looking for an escape route.” Toby awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “And that wasn’t even the weird part.”

“There’s more?” Sam asked, surprised.

“Yeah, I was going to ask if you would like to go out with me sometime?”

“Oh…” Sam mumbled. “Look, I’m flattered but…”

“But it’s weird. Dating your potentially dead best friend’s look alike?”

“Yeah, something like that,” Sam laughed awkwardly. “I wish the circumstances were different cause you’re a very good-looking guy. Besides, I live in D.C. and you live in New York… it wouldn’t work.” Speaking of New York, Sam looked down at his phone and realized he had no calls or messages from Bucky. He felt another pang in his heart. Did Bucky forget it was Sam’s birthday? Sam could forgive Sarah for forgetting since she was stressed out, but Bucky had no excuse.

“Hello?” Toby brought Sam out of his thoughts and Sam looked over at him to find the guy giving him a curious look. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. And sorry again.”

“Oh, don’t sweat it. Can I have your phone?” Toby asked.

Sam looked at him suspiciously, but then he unlocked his phone and gave it to the actor.

“That’s my number. If you ever wanna watch the show, just hit me up and I’ll leave you the tickets. Or if you ever just wanna hang out, lemme know.” The guy gave him a charming smile that resembled Steve’s before handing over his phone.

They landed soon and Toby wished Sam a happy birthday once again before they parted ways.

Sam’s phone rang as he made his way to the exit and he quickly took it out, only to find it was Sharon. He tried not to sound disappointed as he answered the phone, “Hey Sharon.”

“Happy birthday, Sam,” she said, making Sam smile.

“Thanks,” Sam replied.

“Where are you? I was hoping to take you out to dinner tonight. Figured you wouldn’t want to be on your own on your birthday.”

“I’m in Louisiana,” Sam replied. “Just landed here.”

“Oh wow. That wasn’t in your plan until yesterday.”

“Plans changed,” Sam replied, shrugging, although she couldn’t see him.

“Well, I owe you dinner then,” said Sharon. “Catch up with me when you get back?”

“Will do.”

They said their goodbyes and hung up by the time Sam got to the exit. Sam then called up Sarah. “Where are you?” He asked.

“I’m almost there,” Sarah replied.

Sarah was there 5 minutes later and when Sam opened the passenger door to get in, he heard part of the conversation she was having on the phone. “I’m on my way,” she said to someone. “I swear Bu-- Bonnie, if you mess this up--”

Sam frowned at that. He was so sure Sarah was about to say Bucky.

“What, you too old to give your sister a hug now?” Sarah asked after she hung up.

Sam rolled his eyes at her dramatics and reached over to hug her. “How you doing?” He asked.

“I could be better,” Sarah replied.

Sam pulled apart and gave her a sympathetic look. “You wanna tell me what’s going on now?” He asked as she pulled out of the loading zone.

“When we get home,” Sarah replied. “Can we talk about something else for now?”

“Okay,” Sam sighed and let it go. For now.

They talked about Sam’s Cap job. Sarah seemed proud of him. She even said so multiple times, which made Sam smile throughout their ride to Delacroix.

“So who’s Bonnie and why were you threatening her?” Sam asked as they pulled up in the driveway.

“Oh, she’s just one of the moms in PTA. We have a fundraiser coming up but it’s hard to leave her in charge of things.” Sarah replied as she typed away on her phone.

“Then why do you?” Sam asked as he got out of the car and grabbed his backpack.

“I ask myself the same question,” Sarah mumbled under her breath, but Sam still heard it.

The house was eerily quiet when Sam and Sarah got inside. “Where are the boys?” Sam asked. But then he heard noises in the backyard and immediately became alert. “Is there someone back there?” Sam asked.

“Why don’t you go check it out?” Sarah suggested.

Her nonchalance took Sam aback but he said nothing as he made his way towards the backdoor.

“SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SAM!”

“Shit!” Sam almost fell back when a group of about 30 people greeted him in the backyard. “What is happening?” Sam asked, dumbfounded.

“Your birthday, that’s what, Uncle Sam!” AJ laughed as he and Cass came over and hugged him. “Happy birthday, Uncle Sam,” both kids wished him at the same time.

Sam felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around to see Sarah smiling broadly at him. “Happy birthday, Sam,” she wished him but couldn’t give him a hug as she was holding his birthday cake. So Sam gave her a side hug instead.

“Is Bucky here too?” He asked when he noticed the Oreo cake Sarah was holding.

“Yeah, he’s in the back there, trying but failing to grill,” she laughed. “Go get him while I get the cake set up.”

Sam nodded and made his way through the crowd, greeting and talking to pretty much everyone.

“So this is why I didn’t get any calls or messages from you,” Sam said when he finally got to Bucky.

Bucky turned around and smirked at him. “Had I known you were waiting for my call, Wilson--”

“I wasn’t!” Sam answered a little quicker than necessary.

“Right…” Bucky trailed off. “Well, get over here so I can wish you!”

“Alright, bossy,” Sam shook his head before walking over to Bucky and giving him a tight hug.

“Happy birthday, Sam,” Bucky said, hugging him back.

They pulled apart but stayed close together, Sam’s eyes briefly trailing down to Bucky’s lips.

“You gonna kiss me?” Bucky asked.

Sam immediately looked up at him. “What? No!”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to it if you did,” Bucky replied.

“Of course you wouldn’t,” Sam laughed and moved away from him. “So you and Sarah plan this?”

“The boys came up with the idea. Sarah called me up last week and asked if I was in. Of course, I was.”

“You came all the way from New York, just to prepare for my surprise birthday party?” Sam asked, feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

“Don’t look too happy. I did it for Sarah and the boys.”

“Right…” Sam trailed off, rolling his eyes. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“Nothing does. You’re kinda in my thoughts all the time.”

Sam opened and closed his mouth a few times but no words came out.

“I’m as the kids say ‘a simp for you’” Bucky snickered at his own terrible joke.

Sam put his hand behind Bucky’s head and pulled him in to kiss him. Bucky seemed surprised at first but then he kissed him back.

When they pulled apart, Sam smiled at Bucky. “Now come on. Time for my terrible Oreo cake.”

“Hey! It’s the best cake out there!” Bucky protested. “And this time I made it myself.” He added, much to Sam’s surprise.

“I didn’t have a death wish on my birthday,” Sam joked.

“Haha hilarious,” Bucky said with a roll of his eyes.

“I’m a grade-A comedian!” Sam winked at him.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 297: We’re Bustin’ Outta This Joint

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi did his best to undo all of the good vibes from the Girl Power arc by killing off Midnight. It sucks and I still don’t like it, but it is what it is. Unfortunately, Not Killing Off Your One Female Teacher Character With Any Character Development was worth 30% of his grade for the semester, so it brought his average down all the way to a C-, and so he and his report card will just have to live with that. Meanwhile Ochako did some rescuing, and the other U.A. kids lay around unconscious and/or traumatized. The chapter ended with an abrupt cut to Tartarus, where AFO is apparently just chilling and waiting for the Nearly High Ends to come bust him free. What kind of a cliffhanger is that to leave your fans hanging on for three whole weeks. Who’s suffering more here, the characters or the readers.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “okay I know you all want to know what happens to Deku and Shouto and the rest, but have you considered finding out what happens to Overhaul and Muscular and Moonfish and New Girl Character instead?” Fandom is all, “you had us at New Girl Character.” Seiji’s dad is all, “I’m just going to say a bunch of stuff to help make sure none of the readers feel conflicted about cheering on a bunch of mass murderers escaping from prison.” Tomura is all, “dammit AFO why are you still here.” AFO is all, “shhh, Tomura, go back to sleep.” Tomura is all, “wtf but you’re literally hijacking my body and continuing to shred it to bits while we break into BnHA Alcatraz to recruit your own personal Suicide Squad.” AFO is all, “:).” Real!AFO is all, “HERE I AM, EVERYONE, SORRY TO KEEP YOU WAITING.” And then the chapter ends. Geez.

oh shit lol it’s a whole big fucking page all about Tartarus

my very first thought was “that’s a long-ass fucking bridge”, and then I went to go google “longest bridges”, and Wikipedia was all “son there are literally a hundred and fifty bridges in the real world longer than 5km, and the longest one is actually 165km”, and I was all “oh shit I really don’t know jack shit about bridges.” then I looked at the list for a few more minutes and realized that the super-long bridges were all built over land, and that the longest bridge over water is only 38km. which is way more reasonable, but also still really fucking long though?? ngl I would freak the fuck out on that bridge. what does any of this have to do with Tartarus you ask?? absolutely nothing, I literally forgot I was reading a chapter for a sec lol uh

anyway, my parting thought on the bridge is that it kind of defeats the whole purpose of having a giant island fortress prison, but whatever. moving on

and the six levels thing is straight out of One Piece lol. something tells me BnHA’s prison break arc isn’t going to be quite as fun. hmm

so now we’re cutting to “the Bronze Gate”, which is the main entrance off of the bridge, and some goat-looking motherfucker is out here trying to become my new favorite character. bro

SON OF A BITCH WHAT’S WITH THE BULLETS FLYING IN THE BACKGROUND. DON’T TELL ME THEY’RE SHOOTING AT GYGES. THEY CAN’T KILL OFF MY FRESHEST HOMIE GYGES. SURELY THEY WOULDN’T

ooh and now, giant robots!

giant robots with machine guns. “I’m very sorry I killed off Midnight, makeste” you know what, fuck you Horikoshi. thinking you can buy my affections back so easily

does Gyges have six arms??? look how fucking calm he is announcing the code red security lockdown, holy shit. GYGES

NOOOO

NO NOT BRIAREUS. THIS DAY EXACTS A HEAVY TOLL

YO, WHAT

he came there himself?? so much for making the Noumus do his dirty work. and based on the speech bubble shape and font, this is still AFO talking

uh oh what’s happening

is he using Decay or is his arm just sort of crumbling to pieces because he hasn’t had time to heal up yet? if it’s the former this prison break is going to set a record for shortest arc yet isn’t it

now we’re cutting to B10 which is apparently the lowest level. but do they mean lowest as in the least security, or lowest as in the deepest underground, a.k.a. the most security? idk it’s confusing and I think they should be more specific. is it B like in basement?? are there six levels or ten?? stupid Tartarus

anyway so the guards are talking about how Gigantomachia is scheduled to arrive tomorrow morning. heh. will there even be a Tartarus tomorrow morning

(ETA: WELL, UH.)

wow they’re talking about just killing him outright. damn

I kinda feel like “prison guard” is one of those jobs that just sort of naturally attracts shitty people. anyways yeah, Seiji your dad is a real piece of work

and he’s even doubling down on it after the other guy repeatedly keeps trying to hush him up. dude we get it, you’re an asshole

ooh and now we’re getting an interesting look at the various prisoners, some of whom look suspiciously familiar!

for starters, that’s definitely Moonfish in the upper left corner, I’m like 99% sure. not quite clear who that is across from him in the upper right, but it’s been a hot minute since we saw Muscular, so maybe?

and could that be Overhaul in the panel beneath him?? they’re not showing his face so I assume it’s someone we’d recognize, and he’s the only currently-incarcerated villain with that haircut as far as I can recall. though it seems weird that he’s not restrained more given his quirk. I thought Horikoshi mentioned in Ultra Analysis that he’d gotten it back somehow. eh well we will wait for answers

I don’t recognize the person to his left either (though she has an oddly familiar look to her?). but the person on the bottom right, next to Kurogiri... is it Stain?? the hair and body language are sure giving off Stain vibes. if someone had told the me from two years ago that I’d actually be excited to see Stain again I would have said you were full of shit. and yet here we are. these sure are interesting times

anyway so now the Code Red intruder alarm is blaring. and I gotta say, that one scene sure was effective at killing any sympathy I might have been inclined to feel for these guards lol. bring on the imminent massacre

“what horrible timing” lol yes. it’s almost as if they planned it that way

uh oh

is he omae wa shindeiruing. watch your six, Mr. Prison Guard

oh shit

WHAT DID I SAY. WHAT DID I FUCKING SAY. but nooo, you all were all, “but a bridge is more convenient!” VERY WELL THEN, LIE IN THE BED THAT YOU HAVE MADE

anyway so it’s the High Ends lol. I mean we already knew it was them. let’s just get on with it

omfg Tomura ARE YOU RIDING ONE

WHAT ARE YOU, A NAZGUL. WHY IS THIS MY FAVORITE THING

and it looks like it actually is Tomura again, too (as opposed to AFOmura)

-- is he using Decay on himself?? is that what it is?? or no wait, is this just more of the weird side effect shit that’s been happening since he Awakened. actually yeah never mind that’s clearly what it is

y’all this man is out here having a full blown argument with himself

so this is equal parts compelling and hilarious to me right now lol. like I feel so bad for Tomura, but I also lowkey want to see how far this escalates. like do you think he’d go as far as to punch himself in the face. where will this journey lead us

fucking look at this shit

other people have already mentioned this, but with this scene especially it makes me really curious how they’re going to show this in the anime. will it be AFO’s voice coming out of Tomura’s mouth? or Tomura’s voice using AFO’s speech patterns? more importantly, will it be cool and dramatic, or will it actually wind up being hilarious? or both?? never count out both

also he’s looking pretty good there in that bottom panel with his one eye just barely visible. that doesn’t have anything to do with anything, but here I am, pointing it out

also also, lol at Tomura being all, “the fuck do you mean, ‘rest’, you’re the one that dragged my body out here to raid a fucking prison,” and AFO being all, “oh yeah, lol, true true, but I meant rest after that.” yes, this man clearly has nothing but the purest intentions, Tomura. trustworthy af

this fucking guy. Tomura is your bullshit radar finally operational yet?? can you see yet that it was always his intention to use you right from the very start?? oh man I am starting to get fidgety now listening to this

so Tomura’s saying he doesn’t just want to be used as a chess piece. and AFO is all, “well okay but what if it’s a VERY NICE AND IMPORTANT chess piece.” bro DID HE STUTTER

-- AHH BUT NEVER MIND THAT, HERE IT IS, THIS IS WHERE THE FUN STARTS OMG

GO ON AND ACQUIRE THEM THEN! omg. why am I so fucking excited. it seriously makes no sense. like seriously, ‘hooray, our old buddies, Overhaul and Stain!!’ -- come again now?? who is this person that I have become

meanwhile AFO is making all this fuss and I really don’t understand it though

why would you need to plow directly through the building. why can’t you just use doors like a normal person. it’s not like they can lock you out, like hello, you can literally turn anything you touch into dust, what’s with all the melodrama

anyway so he’s apparently hitting the prison with some sort of EMP attack now and shutting down all their systems

omg the suspense is killing me. this is going to be so badass once it’s animated, but right now all I keep thinking is “YES, GREAT, CAN WE PLEASE JUST MOVE IT ALONG”

the doors are opening ahhhhhhh come on come on come on let’s go let’s get to the excitement already

now the guards are running over to try and regain control. but, like

yeah that’s pretty much how I’m expecting the rest of this to go basically

so now they’re shooting at the dust cloud lol. well if there’s one thing movies have taught me, it’s that bad guys who wait inside clouds of dust while panicked cops blindly rain bullets at them until they run out of ammo are basically invincible lol. soooooo

OHHHHH SHIT

AHAHAHAHAHAHA. THEY ARE SO FUCKED LOL, SHIT

YEP, AND HERE’S ANOTHER ONE

is this the first time we’ve seen Moonfish’s face? I feel like we might have caught a glimpse of it before on an omake page or something. either way, it wasn’t anything I actually needed to see again. thanks...?? I guess??

okay but seriously, are we supposed to actually know who this badass lady is?? like I don’t know her but I feel like I know her, you feel?

(ETA: lol there are already like 60 different theories about how she’s related to every single character in the series. will be interesting to see if anything comes of this. although we did just get three “this villain was secretly related to [insert character(s) here] all along” reveals just in the last arc, so idk, it might be better if we pass on it this time lol.)

girl who are you. please stick around. for the love of god don’t let this man kill you off too

????

wait so is this Overhaul? boy sure has seen better days huh. but the floppy sleeves... yeah, it’s gotta be him

anyway so then the only ones missing are Stain and Kurogiri, yes?? omg. and one page left to go

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO CONVINCE ME HE COULDN’T HAVE DONE THIS SHIT RIGHT FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. FUCKING TIME-BIDING DRAMA QUEEN

AND HE’S JUST FLOATING HIS LIFE SUPPORT SYSTEM ALONG BEHIND HIM SOB. THIS FUCKING GUY

AND IS HE JUST ABSENTMINDEDLY DRAGGING SOME POOR SCHLUB’S CORPSE ALONG BESIDE HIM LIKE A SLEEPY TODDLER CARRYING THEIR TEDDY BEAR. I FUCKING CAN’T. REST IN PEACE, FRIEND. GIVE MY REGARDS TO GOOD OLD BRIAREUS

so that’s it! and we still don’t have any idea what AFO is actually planning to do now, after all of that. are they going to merge bodies?? or is he going to try to switch with him?? either way Tomura’s body has to be part of the plan somehow since he keeps making so much of a fuss over it. flkhglkhlk. dammit I need answers lol

[thespacebetweenmoments]

How about B & K for Thomphrey and O & Y for Vextan? 💙 Can't wait to read your headcanons!

Ahhh thank you for asking! Now that I look back, I might have gotten a little carried away with how much I wrote so sorry about that! I hope you enjoy them though 😄💜 (also please forgive the chaotic paragraphs—I copy-and-pasted this from bullet points in Google Docs and didn’t want to have to reformat it all!)

Thomphrey

B: Beauty. What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Thomas about Humphrey:

If asked straight-up, I think Thomas would be struck dumb trying to narrow it down to just one or two things. He thinks everything is beautiful about Humphrey, because that’s just how he is and how he loves—he’s a romantic and a romanticist at heart, after all.

I think what Thomas admires most about Humphrey, though, is that he’s kind. He hasn’t had an easy life, or death, and it would be so easy for him to be bitter about pretty much his whole existence. He isn’t, though. He’s warm and sunny and cheerful and optimistic and, above all, hopelessly kind.

On a more superficial note, if Thomas absolutely had to only pick one thing, I think he’d say that Humphrey’s eyes are quite possibly the most beautiful he’s ever seen. He waxes poetic about them so often that Humphrey has taken to closing them with a cheeky smile when he’s had enough, but Thomas doesn’t mind. He loves their colour, their depth, how they sparkle with mischief and humour so much that you would think he was still alive, how they crinkle at the corner when Humphrey laughs.

Humphrey about Thomas:

It has to be his passion for anything and everything. Thomas doesn’t seem to do anything by halves and, while it seems to annoy the other ghosts, Humphrey never tires of hearing him rant about prosody or watching him dance in the mornings. He just seems so in touch with the world, even though he’s dead: every time he gets excited about something or angry about something or finds something beautiful it feels like it’s the first time he’s experiencing that emotion. Humphrey finds it endearing and admirable at the same time.

In terms of physical beauty, Humphrey would probably answer that it’s… all of Thomas. All of him. From the tips of his curls that are much softer than they look all the way down to the bottom of his feet that have kicked Humphrey so many times, Humphrey loves all of Thomas just the same. And that’s a lot. (He does have a soft spot for his hands, though, because he finds that the feeling of one of Thomas’ hands in his is the best feeling in the world.)

K: Kiss. Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Honestly? They weren’t good kissers at first. Not really. Humphrey had barely had any practice, and Thomas none at all, but they didn’t realise that they were so bad at it until they got a lot more practice in and improved!

They had shared a few cheek/forehead/hair kisses before, but their first proper kiss was shy, awkward, wonderful, and a complete accident. Thomas was lying in Humphrey’s lap and turned to ask him a question but, just as he did so, Humphrey happened to lean down to press a kiss into Thomas’ hair. They met in the middle without meaning to, and both of them looked at each other in complete shock. Neither of them broke it, though, until after Thomas had closed his eyes, a hand coming up to rest on Humphrey’s cheek, and Humphrey had pulled him up and closer. When Thomas opened his eyes, Humphrey was wearing a smile and a blush that spread all the way up to the tips of his ears. He looked so lovely like that that Thomas simply had to kiss him again.

VexTan

O: On Cloud Nine. What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

When they’re in love, Vex and Ho-Tan can’t stop smiling. At all.

They can’t quite articulate it, but both of them feel as though something has shifted, as though some impassable object has somehow been moved and now there’s nothing to stop them from being happy pretty much all the time.

For want of a better term, they’re absolutely smitten with one another.

When they get together, Vex is so jovial anyway that the others don’t really notice it at first. In fact, it’s Ho-Tan that truly gives it away.

She’s always relatively reserved compared to the others (not that it’s hard to be so), so the different ways she reacts to Vex are more noticeable than how he reacts to her, if that makes sense?

I think the best way to explain both how they express their feelings for each other and how the other Elders find out about the two of them is that Vex’s main love language is acts of service, and Ho-Tan’s is words of affirmation.

Every morning after a night where they haven’t shared a bed, Vex will make sure to slip a little note under Ho-Tan’s door. It’s always something cute but genuine, and he always ends it by telling her that she’s beautiful and he loves her (sometimes that’s the whole note, and that’s enough). No one else notices that.

Vex doesn’t sleep well most nights, which is partly why he always falls asleep in the chamber (the council sessions also just bore him, but he keeps that point between him and Ho-Tan). One day, when he falls asleep, Ho-Tan puts down her quill for a moment, quietly gets up, and gently puts a pillow (that she’d brought with her) behind Vex’s head so his neck doesn’t ache so much when he wakes up. Her hand ghosts over his face and she smiles to herself as she sits back down, and everyone notices that.

Y: Yearning. How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

They’re not used to being apart, so when they’re more than just a few steps away from each other, it’s really difficult for both of them.

Vex finds he sleeps even worse than usual, and Ho-Tan finds that she starts to feel a little gloomier the longer she spends away from him.

What helps, though, is that each of them has a little teddy bear (Thanktival presents from Debbie one year!) that they sleep with each night. When they have to spend time far away from each other, they always make sure to swap teddies first.

The one that Vex gives Ho-Tan is blue, with a little tartan patch over his left eye. He has a little love heart sewn onto his right paw. The one that Ho-Tan gives to Vex is yellow, and has a pink tummy. She has a little love heart sewn on her left paw.

[written-beyond-the-grave]

Mikaelsons Black History Month

First off, I’m starting by saying that even though it is no longer Black history month it will always be melanin everyday and black people every day. And everything else under the sun, and if you don’t like it then the exit is to your left. Everything you own in the box to the left

Being part of the Mikaelsons is very fickle business and be some bs. Like really, you’re here with supernatural beings who are over 1000 years old. Who have traveled the world, gained endless knowledge, seen a lot of bloodshed, but you know what they haven’t seen? Their token human (black ofc) being ignant for black history month, I mean who even fully celebrates? How does one even celebrate?

Granted, they’re not racist. But with the writing Julie Pleck did she was playing honestly. That was the worst writing I've ever seen since who knows when. Maybe the nine lives of Chloe king or something? But in my originals universe they were probably racist in the beginning to an extent then grew out of it.

Anyways, they never met someone who celebrated until they met you!

Now repeat after me: I’m black y’all, and I’m black y’all. And I’m black and black and black y’all! FYM

Now…. picture this: A moderately quiet day in the Mikaelson household. Kol is minding his business for once, Rebekah is trying to find the perfect pics for her next instagram post, Elijah is enjoying a good read, and Klaus is organizing his art materials. But then here comes you, the human, opening the door and walking right in like you pay bills (none of them do but you get the picture) in the midst of the most deadly people. Walking in and greeting everyone, walking in with the most hotep, Dr. Umar bullshit getup they ever seen. Coming to America headass.

They recognize your footsteps from a mile away, so when you walk into the kitchen and no one really looks up at first it’ll be a sight to see a whole ass pelted lion on your back. The kente cloth hat (no idea the actual name for it, sorry babes), a saber tooth necklace (for my mans T’Challa), and the red stiletto nails with the afro out here banging.

SHEEEEEEEEESH

Once Elijah is done with his page he looks up to greet you, but then stops… Bitch, fuck is you wearing? This was worlds away from the sweats, and skinny jeans you wore on the daily.

“Greetings Y/N you look…. Fashionable.” Mans didn’t know what to say. Did he miss something about your Africna roots? Was there a holiday he hadn’t heard of, doubt it, but what else was there?

“Thank you Elijah.” You fluff out your lion pelt for added effect, if there was ever going to be one time you outdo the Mikaelsons’ especially Elijah in being dramatic with a coat or cloak of somesort, it would be now.

At this point the Kol and Rebekah have already looked up and were confused. Why are you dressed like that?

Kol is the first one to speak up “Darling, Rebekah likes a fashion show more than anyone, but why do you have a lion… on your shoulder.”

Lifting up your large ass shades you supplied an answer: “Black History Month”

They all looked at each other… they didn’t get it. Like they know what it is, but never actually understood how to celebrate and all that nor did they ever actually give it mind. When you saw that they weren’t making a connection, you started phase 1.

“Alexa, you know what to do.”

And there goes their manor playing: NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA I’M ONE HUNDRED PERCENT NIGGA

LMFAOOOOO you got the white people shook. Klaus just dropped one of his expensive ass bottles of art sealants and is vamp speeding to the kitchen to figure out what the hell is going on. Elijah having a mid century crisis on how tf they even found you and deemed you worthy of being in their presence so casually. Kol is having fun in the back, still laughing at your get up. And Rebekah wishes she went to the mall instead, she wanted a girl bestie and got you instead rip

“WHAT IN BLAZES- Y/N WHAT ARE YOU DO- WHAT ARE YOU WEARING! ALEXA STOP THE MUSIC-” And the big bad wolf has arrived. You put your finger to Klaus’ lips which stuns him bc… you’re still HOOOMAN like damn, death wish much? And you look this man, straight in his mit and say “Looks at, look at me” and pause for dramatic affect, “I am the captain now”

Room silent as hell till Kol starts cackling

You’ve made Dr. Umar proud, the ancestors are shining on you once again

With that you lead into a whole speech about the black struggle and black history month, bottom line: REPARATIONS. Because being the only nigga in the Mikaelsons (we don’t claim Marcel) is exhausting, white people shit everyday that you complain about in their faces

TBH at this point they’re indulging you in this escapade.

First victim is Elijah, you ask for his wallet. He gives you a look, I mean he does technically give you what you want and whatever (when y’all dating, refer back to my dating Elijah post), so he ask you why. Reparations sis why, but then you stop yourself. This man gives you his wallet every other day, half the time you not even asking. What could you rob this man of…. Ah. You ask him for the deed of one of his estates in Prague, why? Because you bitches can’t even spell Prague. And under section S line 45 subsection Y it does state that estates are eligible for reparations. Fuck 40 acres and a mule, you got 300 acres, some stallions in the back, a quite possibly haunted mansion, and a heavy dicked (yeah I said it, a sis been trying to reality shift) original who will turn you out by the end of the day and the end of the month…. Wait till women's history month boo

We know his pockets figgity fat, and it would be figgity wack to not get some

Ngl you take Kol with you so he can buy you food. Granted, he knows what you’re doing, but if he’s going to spend money on anything it will be thawed and it will be music. However, one thing leads to another and you’re both at Wal-Mart waiting to find a parking spot. You stole one off a white minivan trying to move in. Not thinking anything of it because who in this small ass Mystic Falls ass, clown ass town really about it? Apparently Karen.

But you know who else what about it? Kol (tbh mans had nothing but time, and he claims you so why tf not.) he out here NY stomping on her and coming at her for badly glued extensions. Cheap ass bitch, ain’t even blend in correctly.

After that Kol and you left with some groceries, a new story to tell, and a chopped cheese.

With Klaus, he frfr wasn’t finna do shit. Being ordered my a human? Lmfao, go find another simp sis. But… once you suggest that his art skills may not be up to par on what you have in mind as a new family room piece for your house he’s all ears. He knows what you’re doing, but… he still wants to prove you wrong. But anyways, you give him a theme… reverse racism. IK y’all, it’s not a thing, but mans has ideas. And he outdoes himself. That and the recreation of the moorish chief bc that man...mmmmm that man was giving.

Ok so Google wanna hoe me, but there was a painting of a black man in a kkk cloak and behind him were white people being hung from a tree. Say what you want, but that photo was fire. If any of you seen it please share it below.

Anyways

Rebekah tbh wants no part in this, but I feel like she’d gave when you ask her to give you all the finest dresses bc it’s an excuse to exhaust Klaus’ money.

Through the month you give the Mikaelsons a run for their money, and maybe sanity. Klaus is in the back trying to research who tf Dr. Umar is and why is he your inspiration

They had to pull you back when the sheriff asked you for your ID. You ask why you needed white man paperwork!

You are pleasing the spirits, what bonnie could never do lmfaooooo. The powers of you enemies aren’t prospering this month nor next month.

You’re not poor this month, anything you poor of is pouring a little more (bars nigga)

LMFAOOOO imaging asking the fam to go to paris, like, they not invited it’s a self trip funded my the Mikaelson Y/N Trust Fund of Public Decency ™

Klaus would be the first one to speak because this man is TIRED, “Love, why do you need a trip to paris? What’s in Paris?”

Knowing better, you look to Kol to answer the question, “I don’t know, Kol, who’s in Paris?” Niggas b. Niggas in paris…. Lemme chill

LMFAOOO enjoy