#i can say how accurate things are trust
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rae-unbeloved · 2 months ago
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Modern amrev au but instead of taking place in america it tames place in the uk the whole time. Specifically scotland. Im not saying this for any reason whatsoever what
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eisthenameofme · 13 days ago
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"you are not immune to propaganda/cult indoctrination" is largely useful and the sort of shit it's used to point out as not making you immune (being "smart" or a certain degree of educated, etc) is worth pointing out and it never feels like the appropriate place to mention it, but a lot of people seem to be conflating "the things people think make them immune to this kind of thing doesn't because it doesn't work that way" along with "the same conditions that make people more vulnerable to indoctrination/conspiritorial thinking/etc can happen to anyone" with "everyone in the world is equally vulnerable to every kind of indoctrination under the same conditions" and i just don't think that's objectively true.
It may be true that someone started out holding one belief and flipped to hold the apparently opposite belief, but does that actually mean everyone who holds that belief is equally liable to change their mind? Why did they hold that belief in the first place? Is it consistent with their values and what they care about more broadly, and do they specically go out of their way to combat the potential for misinformation and propaganda? Are they prone to making their decisions based on what the people around or closest to them think instead of thinking for themselves? To what extent do they base their values and decsions on kneejerk emotional reactions? (these aren't the only factors obviously, just examples of other potential contributing factors) It is not a given that everyone will answer these questions in the same way, and this is part of why different people respond differently in similar situations. Also not everyone will respond positively to techniques that often work to draw people in (eg lovebombing is a common tactic that works on a lot of people, but may be actively offputting or ring alarm bells for others; different people have different tolerances for attempts at social control and some might nope out the moment they see it attempted regardless of any other factors).
"You Yes Even You" can be an important tactic to get people who wouldn't otherwise to legitimately consider why these tactics work on people and what might work on them and keep in mind that the people it Does happen to usually aren't aware of it and it's not always their fault the way it's often presented, but that is not objectively the same thing as "anyone can fall down any pipeline not matter what forever"
like maybe no one is literally "immune to propaganda" but if a type of propoganda is something that necessarily hinges on X mechanism and a person is notorious for both intellectually and instinctively being violently opposed to X. then yeah I think the propoganda that hinges on X is probably going to be a Very Difficult to Impossible sell, even potentially under coercion, especially if that person has already demonstrated that they are willing to put themeslves at risk/resist that kind of coercion about it. unless your argument is that there is scp level literal mind control happening.
#a lot of people talk about how they were initially conservative because they grew up surrounded by and being taught that#and it's true that there are circumstances like that that can make it less likely for people to initially form different opinions/etc#i'm not saying that it inherently happens because people are fundamentally less intelligent or whatever#but it's also true that there are people who decide to question that sort of thing from an early age and without outside intervention#maybe they noticed holes in the logic and 'care more about being right than being happy'#maybe they decided truth/accurate information was important enough they were going to fact check Everything to be sure#maybe they didn't appreciate being expected to trust/agree blindly with whatever they were told#and that would be the case regardless of who said it or what they were saying#this doesn't mean they're 'smarter' but i do think there are factors/personal values/personal reactions even#that can make you less succeptible to certain things. for example if you're fundamentally opposed to the sort of#social control cults use (not just because you intellectually recognise that it's important/moral standards. i don't want to#really get into 'force of will/resolution' arguments here because that's not really what i'm trying to point out#and people might take that as being like. inherently 'better' or something) but because#say you're violently repulsed by the concept like on an instinctive visceral level and have a track record of noping out#the second you see anything resembling them (maybe even to your detriment in certain situations/false alarms/etc.#again i'm not trying to make the argument of people having like. a uniquely accurate and foolproof Cult Radar superpower)#then yeah i don't know if 'immune' is the word i'd use but i'd think you're probably way less likely to stick around if it's#a deal breaker no matter what for you. or if you have that response to a common tactic to be drawn in by that specific tactic#than someone without that viceral response would be even under extremely comparable circumstances.#like people can and do cut off people they're very close to or put themselves in danger for similar reasons (or for less tbh)#because different people are different and respond differently to things and have natural strengths and weaknesses and#personality traits and like. variation in general. that may make various tactics more or less likely to work on them.#it's not a matter of being 'smarter' or generally 'better' and there are a variety of differenft factors involved#(so someone could be resistant to a certain tactic but uniquely sicceptible to another) but like.#it's a thing that can probably happen i think. no experience is universal#mypost#this is just a pet peeve rip. can you tell this has been building for a while.
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angorwhosebabyisthis · 7 months ago
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analyzing hermes, emet-selch, the ancients and ascians, how they're written, and the fandom's reaction to them be like hm. emet-selch's role in this fuckery is compounded by the fact that his backstory as a genocide survivor is incongruous with his ruling a huge genocidal colonialist world power in the present da [ANTISEMITISM BLAST]
#ffxiv#ffxiv hermes#emet-selch#i have Posts in Me to write up about the subject but like you can maybe immediately start connecting some dots here lmao#hermes and the ancients lie at the intersection of A Lot of Shit That is Very Important to Me#the vast majority of it having to do with gaslighting in various different forms#one of those posts is going into how his story reminds me eerily of what Questioning Things in an abusive evangelical environment is like#and how the fandom instantly jumping straight to OH SO YOU THINK THE ANCIENTS SHOULD HAVE BEEN GENOCIDED IS THAT IT#YOU THINK THEY SHOULD BE INFANTILIZED AND CIVILIZED BY THE SUPERIOR MORALS OF YOUR OWN CULTURE IS THAT IT#and start throwing around words like 'sympathizer'; if you say 'hermes was right about some shit actually'#'what we see of the ancients' society is full of inexcusably horrific shit which does not get a pass for ~different values~'#smacks strongly to me of evangelical crybullying in the name of Cultural Sensitivity#and how people use 'well it's not my business what other cultures think is right or wrong' as an excuse to throw up their hands and#disengage from actually learning about or supporting the people in those cultures who know and are working within it to fight bigotry#amazingly enough 'racism and misogyny and queerphobia are bad' is not an idea exclusive to western cultures lmfao#your job if you engage is to seek out those people--across the spectrum of opinions and relationships to their culture's issues!#they're not a monolith!--and spread that information; and listen to what they ask of you when they tell you what kind of help they need#but that's complicated; and takes time and care and thought and effort and connecting to marginalized people#talking over activists and victims of the societal issues they live with; and telling them they're the same as colonizers; is easy-peasy#like i cannot stress enough here that hermes Is an Ancient. He Lives Here. He Knows His Society and Thinks About It a Lot#He Wants to Salvage It and is Specifically Fucked Up About Feeling Like He Can't Trust People Around Him for Input#WoL doesn't barge in and start telling the ancients what's what; they find the person who Cares and back him up that he's not crazy or alon#anyway there's a lot here but it is uh. a Lot. the ways in which the game blends up christianity and judaism here.#including the fact that between the two; the default cultural values and dynamics align more with christian associations of Conformity#(the game is by japanese creators and i feel like that's A Factor too; but there are Eerily Accurate evangelical things going on here)#and people cape for the ones who are Most Evangelical about it + the one whose Compelling Aspects are all antisemitic as fuck tropes#whereas the brown guy who grapples with his faith and worldview; who questions and challenges and argues with others in his ethnoreligion#and tries to look for perspective and deeper meaning + Improve Society Somewhat; gets torn apart in the worst faith possible by the fandom#ffxivtag#warning: worm grass
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isekyaaa · 4 months ago
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If you don't know me well and you've heard my opinions abt people talking shit, I probably seem like the person that enjoys talking shit about others. To which the truth of the matter is that I don't. Tbh, I feel I do something worse. When I talk about a person to someone else, I break them down from the bottom up by analyzing what makes them so irritating, but also what makes them so great, and I share that analysis with the person I'm talking to. It quickly escalates to bringing up a person's personal issues, traumas, insecurities, etc, and analyzing them under a lens.
#rambles#sometimes if people are really lucky i'll share my analyses with the person themselves#that's really fun#oh how i would love someone to do this to me#or if someone did this to me behind my back i'd hope the person they talked to shares their findings with me#one thing thats true abt me is that i always treat people the way i dont mind getting treated (even if they dont like it)#but my opinion of talking shit is like.....#the line between talking shit and venting can get extremely thin#tell me this#your friend has a coworker that is constantly causing problems for your friend. this person is friendly but utterly incompetent#this coworker piles more work to do on your friend's already stressful job. added onto this this coworker always lies to sound competent#your friend cannot stand their coworker. they can't stand listening to this person or even hearing them breathe#everyday they vent about them to the point that it devolves into getting irritated over the tiniest things#here's the question. is your friend talking shit or are they venting?#are they a bad person for getting so irate?#the thing with talking shit and venting is that regardless of what is said it will always be hurtful to the person talked about#but also sometimes there are very good reasons why a person may get upset and feel the need to vent all the time#should we operate under the fantastical belief to always see the good in everyone and accept everything they do?#should we act like we should always like everyone we talk to and never speak bad about them?#is it wrong to share these charged feelings with someone you trust that would never share it with others?#should you feel upset when people feel the need to vent about you?#or do you think theyre talking shit behind your back?#do you expect everyone to like every aspect about you? and that they should share every gripe they have abt you?#tbh i dont care what ppl say abt me 'behind my back' bc no doubt i do things that bother them#i don't view them as a bad person for doing that#granted there are verified shit talkers and..... ngl those people are fascinating#no doubt toxic but also kinda refreshing to be around? they're very honest but also very.... accurate?#they can point out your deepest insecurity in a second#you can learn a lot abt the human psyche through observing them#theyre the kinds of people whose actions and lifestyle i dont condone but in short spurts theyre pretty fun
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5sospenguinqueen · 4 months ago
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You Got Me Tripping - Mick Schumacher x Williams! Reader
Summary: They say you should never meet your heroes - or the offspring of your heroes - and when you make a complete ass out of yourself in front of Mick, you might agree
Warnings: Swearing. Fluff.
Williams development driver. Pinterest pics
I'm not in love with this but I had the idea so it had to be written haha
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f1news just posted
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liked by landonorris, lilymhe and others 
f1news accurate reenactment of the moment when williams’ development driver, Yn Ln, met the son of hero michael schumacher… and forgot how to walk 
1,221 comments
user1 i love how they can’t post the actual video footage netflix got because you know she threatened everyone to bury it
user2 not the drivers being summoned to a trashy news blog dedicated to them
→ user3 they too are obsessed with this development
its_yn_ln is this what people call news these days? boring!
→ landonorris speak for yourself, this was hilarious 
→ alex_albon i have it saved as my lockscreen
→ logansargeant i’ve definitely watched it more than 10x
→ its_yn_ln i hate you all 
→ georgerussell63 even me? i can introduce you to the hero of your stumblings
→ landonorris probably not the best idea, mate. you'd need her to stay in one piece 
→ williams so do we, she’s our reserve 
user4 she lost aura points for this 
user5 i get it. i too would trip over thin air if mick schumacher smiled at me like that 
user6 why are we all forgetting the most important part?
→ user7 you mean how red she went when he helped her up
user8 and the way he launched forward to catch her 
→ user9 no wonder she swooned
→ user10 mhm if those arms were wrapped around me 😏
williamsracing just posted
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liked by charles_leclerc, mickschumacher and others 
williamsracing following contact earlier today between Yn and the concrete, we’re pleased to confirm that the driver sustained little more than a bruised ego
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its_yn_ln watch yourself, i know where you work 
→ jv.f1 stop threatening the admin, please
→ its_yn_ln but they’re bullying me 
logansargeant where’s the post about my suffering? i had to listen to her complain about how embarrassed she was
→ its_yn_ln stop exposing me! 
→ user11 you’ve exposed yourself 
→ its_yn_ln i really hope i didn’t. nobody said my jeans split
→ landonorris trust me, if we'd seen your ass, you'd have seen me retching
its_yn_ln that’s a lie, i suffered a wound to my elbow 
→ alex_albon it’s a scrape, you didn’t even bleed 
→ its_yn_ln i’ve lost a layer of skin! 
→ alex_albon maybe that’ll make you go faster in practice tomorrow 
→ its_yn_ln @/lilymhe leave him 
oscarpiastri the figure chasing Yn is actually lando
→ its_yn_ln he tried following me into the bathroom earlier! 
mickschumacher i hope she recovers quickly 
georgerussell63 do you want me to ask him to kiss it better?
→ its_yn_ln do you want me to edge you off the track in practice? 
→ williamsracing you’re not allowed to say these things
→ its_yn_ln i’m gonna have to undergo pr training after this, aren’t i?
→ alex_albon yes
→ logansargeant yes
→ williamsracing yes
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mickschumacher just posted
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mickschumacher silverstone 🇬🇧
3,470 comments
pierregasly i have not heard from Yn since these were posted
georgerussell63 can we check nearby holes in case Yn tripped into one
→ its_yn_ln this is why lewis is my favourite merc member
→ georgerussell63 not mick?
→ its_yn_ln i decline to answer that 
alex_albon somebody check on Yn, please
→ landonorris she seemed fine when i passed hospitality. she was enjoying her lunch ;)
→ logansargeant again? interesting. i knew there was a reason she was hiding from williams this weekend
→ charles_leclerc @/pierregasly pay up 
maxverstappen1 why am i reading through mick’s comment section?
→ danielricciardo because we all like seeing Yn getting teased
→ its_yn_ln you’re both off my christmas card list
williamsracing please release your hold on our driver
mercedesamgf1 mick, as much as we love you, we have a couple of admins demanding someone back
→ mickschumacher no thanks
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its_yn_ln just posted
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its_yn_ln when you both get a weekend off and he finally takes you on the picnic he’s promising for the past month 
3,666 comments 
alex_albon it’s not funny when you embrace it
→ its_yn_ln it’s not funny anyway?
→ georgerussell63 not true
→ its_yn_ln @/carmenmmundt leave him
→ alex_albon stop telling our girlfriends to leave us
→ its_yn_ln stop being douchebags then
user11 guys hear me out. what if it’s mick?
→ user12 feels like you're taking a joke just a tad too seriously
→ user13 no, no, let her talk 
landonorris another day, another slay
→ its_yn_ln let’s get you back to the home, grandma
→ landonorris only if we take you back to the fracture clinic
→ its_yn_ln i fell one time! 
→ oscarpiastri it was twice
→ mickschumacher when was the second?
danielricciardo who’s car was coolest?
→ its_yn_ln mine, i had a daytona
→ mercedesamgf1 whoa, he’s building a merc so he clearly wins
williamsracing we get palpitations every time we see your name trending on twitter
→ its_yn_ln i read the pr manual, this doesn’t break the rules! 
→ williamsracing that doesn’t mean we trust you! 
→ logansargeant ouch. and i thought it was just my heart they broke 
user11 okay so she mentioned them both getting a weekend off, it’s the first weekend without a race after the triple header so he’s obvi a driver 
→ user11 then they’re building lego cars. what do mick and yn do for a living? drive cars
→ user11 and then she used a warning slippery floor sign for a meme when the whole internet  has been teasing her for falling over when she first met him 
→ its_yn_ln the fbi needs to hire some of y’all
lilymhe answer my texts, please!!! and thanks xx
mickschumacher looks like a fun weekend
→ its_yn_ln it was! 
→ user14 this is such a bland interaction
→ user11 it’s obvi deliberate babe. they’re trying to throw us off
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mickschumacher just posted
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mickschumacher how could i resist when she literally fell for me 
4,774 comments
its_yn_ln i hate you 
→ mickschumacher that’s not what you were whispering in my ear in that photo 
lilymhe the cutest
→ its_yn_ln whoa, what about us?
→ lilymhe you never fell over for me
→ alex_albon you’re not mick schumacher 
georgerussell63 you can put her down, she’s definitely not going to run away from you 
→ mickschumacher yes but if her feet don’t touch the floor then she can’t fall 
its_yn_ln at least i know you’ll be around to catch me <3
→ landonorris this is gross. go back to publicly humiliating yourself 
→ its_yn_ln just because i have more rizz than you 
→ landonorris not sure how
→ mickschumacher she’s cute. you’re not 
mercedesamgf1 where is your protective gear?
→ its_yn_ln i told you that we'd get in trouble if you posted that 
→ mickschumacher but i wanted everyone to see how good you looked on top of my bike 
→ alex_albon please stop. i can't take anymore giggling
→ logansargeant and i have to listen to her gush about you 
→ williamsracing we are all suffering 
→ its_yn_ln vengeance! this is what happens when you cyberbully me
charles_leclerc this doesn't make her seem very hardcore!
→ its_yn_ln you take that back! i have a reputation to maintain
→ mickschumacher darling, i think you ruined that reputation months ago when we met
f1 and they said being a development driver was only good for getting a seat
→ user16 f1 bringing together true loves
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Requests for F1 smau's are open. You can see who I write for on my masterlist :)
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targaryenluvs · 10 months ago
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— BEST LIFE
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pairings: spencer reid x fem!bau!reader (past), harvey specter x fem!juniorpartner!reader (present)
summary: you’d once been apart of the bau team, but after a situation and a falling out with your boyfriend you moved on. what happens when the bau needs your help on a case, which your boyfriend harvey is also assisting on?
warnings: angsty, asshole harvey cause duh, jealousy (spencer) kisses, cute harvey
wordcount: 1.7k
a/n: this literally sprouted in my mind and i just needed to write it lmao, if you haven’t watched suits or criminal minds go right now‼️ they’re both my husbands 😋
when jessica had called you into her office, you’d been calm. apparently one of your cases, which had you and harvey working together, was now of fbi interest. your client was currently suing a company for faulty wiring in his home, which caused it to burn down. and it was apparently not the case at all, the home was suspected to be tied into a serial arsonist.
what you didn’t expect was for your client to be accused of being the arsonist.
“you’re sitting here,”
“uh-huh.”
“telling me,”
“yup.”
“that i’m supposed to believe that richard jeena, the fifty three year old little man, is a serial arsonist?”
you shut the file infront of you, meeting harvey’s eye, “sweetheart?” he uncrossed his legs, leaning forwards with a sweet smile, “yes?” you leaned forwards as well, “that, is exactly what i’m telling you.” harvey leaned back into his chair, disbelief riddling his face.
“and the fbi is flying here?” you nodded along, “fbi agents?” you nodded again, “probably field agents or whatever they’re called. they’ll sit in on the trial, survey the scenes, collect evidence and all.” the familiar clicking of donna’s heels brought a smile to your face, “profilers.”
your heart dropped with one word, “what’d you say?” donna made her way to the two of you, plopping herself down in the chair next to you, “it’s those fbi profilers. yknow, they look at the room and can tell you if he’s left or right handed, blonde, mommy issues and all. nice little packaged criminal profile in seconds.” you couldn’t help correcting her, having dealt with your fair share of assumptions in your years as a profiler.
“that’s not how it works,” harvey swiveled in his chair as donna looked your way, “oh?” harvey smirked as you sighed, “that’s not how it works, we don’t just walk into a room and have it speak to us. we survey the place, fresh eyes and open minds. we look for the things that everyone else seems to miss. we put ourselves in the minds of the criminals themselves, to get a better understanding of them, why they did it and all. you work your way back, start from the victim maybe, see where they’ve been, what they did in the last week, who they talk to. sometimes the killers in their personal circle but not always. every case is different, we try our best to provide an accurate, unbiased profile.”
“i want to take you on my desk, right now.” you rolled your eyes at your boyfriends words as donna stared intently, “we. you said ‘we’, as if you know what they do and their job. oh my god, you use to be one. that’s the job you had before coming here! you have a degree in criminal justice, and you said your last job you were at for what, seven years?”
“i graduated high school early, entered harvard at a young age, graduated, entered the fbi at the same time as a— friend. was also studying law, sat the exam in new york since it’s where i wanted to be. finished up at harvard, i was mid to late twenties when i left, wound up here and am now a junior partner, capiche?”
“could just say your age.” mike stood by the door with a wad of files in his hand, “i’d rather die, mike.” harvey laughed, “please don’t incentivise my lovely girlfriend to killing herself mike.”
“as nice as it is to see you all bonding, and trust me, it hits me right in the heart, jessica wants yourself and y/n in the conference room.” louis spoke from the door as you stood up, “first of all, trust with you is fickle, second, tell it to hit you in the face next time lou.” you smacked harvey’s arm as he held his arms up, “friendly fire, i’ll put it out later.” you shoved him by his back before smiling at louis, “i’m sorry about him, he’s not a big fan of the fbi.” louis nodded as he followed you, “duly noted.”
“she’s right, damn pigs.” harvey joked as you approached the conference room, “your highness,” you grinned, “you never treat me so nicely when we’re at home harvey.” he held his hand over his heart, “now don’t lie sweetheart, i’m as nice as mike.” the snort that left your lips had harvey doubling over, “oh please, nice as mike? you wish.”
your giggles were drained from your throat as you stared at half of your old team.
derek morgan, emily prentiss, penelope garcia & spencer reid. the last name, and face you’d still not looked at yet. thankfully, harvey noticed your tenseness, “y/n? sweetheart, you alright?” there it was, that word, sweetheart. spencer couldn’t help but wonder, was it just a word? you always use to call him it, before you dated, teasing of course.
“yeah, i’m fine harv.” he nodded, even if he didn’t believe you he could always ask later on. pulling out his and yours chairs, you sat next to one another. “harvey specter & y/n l/n?” emily questioned as you nodded, “the one and only. and then there’s y/n.” harvey leaned back in his chair, whilst derek stared him down.
what an ass. is what he wanted to say, it was also what he assumed emily was thinking. “emily.” she glanced over at you, surprised at you using her name, “it’s nice to see you all. how’ve you been?” and the bewildered expression was wiped clean off your face, no remnant left. you were a damn lawyer, if there was one thing you’d learned, it was to keep a straight face.
penelope smiled, “we’ve been good, y/n. but we miss you, back home. you’re a lawyer now huh?” you grinned, “the one and only.” harvey squeezed your hand, you squeezed back. “youngest junior partner, ever. my dream. just hoping to make it to senior partner soon, take the title of youngest out from under this guy. i’m happy here, i hope you are too. but down to business.”
and for the next few hours, you’d sat and listened. overlooking the case files, giving statements, reviewing security footage from surrounding houses. at some point mike ended up in the room, having met with your client and being harvey’s associate.
you’d had the pleasure of introducing spencer and mike, the two undeniably similar. you felt comfortable, even betting with penelope that if they touched the world would implode.
“and how much would he loose?”
“127,478.23.” mike and spencer rushed out as the rest of you fought to suppress your smiles, “well y/n, seems like we’ve got a genius-off.” derek laughed as the two men looked towards you, “don’t worry i’ll still love you mike.” mike scoffed at your words, “what makes you think i’d loose?”
“because i know you, and i know reid. trust me, you’d loose.”
reid. not spencer, spence, sweetheart. none of the above, you’d used his last name. as if he was nothing more than a colleague.
“okay, we’ve been here for far too long. and as much as i’d like to sit here and slowly rot, i’d rather do that at the restaurant i have booked for dinner with two lovely ladies. y/n and i have a trial date tomorrow, 8.00am. i think, we bring him along, show him what’s to happen if he doesn’t confess, than toast victory champagne when said confession rolls through. how’s that sound?” if derek’s grin was any indicator, besides a big fat yes?
spencer wanted to puke, ‘lovely ladies?’ multiple women? this man was insufferable. you gathered yourself and harvey’s files, a hand gestured towards you, the last file in said hand. “thanks reid.” he smiled, “no problem-o.” your eyebrows furrowed, “never change do you?” spencer didn’t have time to respond, his brain was too busy blowing a fuse as harvey opened the door for you. “ready for dinner lovely lady?” they all heard harvey ask as you nodded, the four watched as you walked out, his hand on your back as he pecked you on the lips.
“reid, you alright?” derek’s hand rested on his shoulder, “i’m fine, why wouldn’t i be fine? don’t we have places to be? hotch would want to know their on our side, that they reviewed all the information. they’ll help us get a confession out of him.” derek sighed, “because you just saw your ex, who you haven’t seen in years. the one you never got over, happily living in new york as comfortable as possible. a successful business woman and lawyer, happily in a relationship.”
spencer shook his head, “you don’t know that.” emily directed a sympathetic smile his way, “we sat with them for three hours. we watched them laugh, bounce off of eachother for theories, quite literally finish eachothers sentences. order food for eachother without asking, and get their meals right. they held hands when they could, he continued to call her sweetheart. and now they’re going out to dinner.”
spencer’s shoulder dropped, they were right. he’d come here excited at the possibility of seeing you again, talking to you. maybe even beginning again with you. instead, you’re apparently with some suited up asshole. he was annoyingly sweet when it came to you though.
as if the whole three hours weren’t a slap in the face, harvey’s voice rung out through the hallway, “there’s my lovely lady!” rachel, who they’d all met earlier on, was currently guiding a young girl to harvey’s arms. “daddy!” if hearts were boats, than his was sinking. he may have had a chance beforehand, but now?
“is mommy here?” your daughter was currently situated on harvey’s hip, “why don’t you hug her and find out?” your arms were out in the open as your daughter squealed before running to you, “d’you have a fun day with rach?” she nodded her head rapidly as yourself and harvey smiled, he stood behind you, chest to back. his hand rested on your waist as the other moved aside hair from her face, before moving hair from your own.
“now, my lovely ladies, it’s time for dinner.”
lovely ladies, for once, spencer had made a mistake. harvey was going out with multiple women, but not in the way he thought. his daughter and the mother of his child, you.
his words and actions meant nothing, they would mean nothing. you were happy, so happy. you had everything you wanted, a loving marriage and man, a gorgeous family. something spencer hadn’t given you. a man who knew you could hold your own. spencer knew that too, but he couldn’t help himself back then.
right now, you were living your best life.
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dollfacefantasy · 1 year ago
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Hold My Calls
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pairing: leon kennedy x fem!reader
summary: you teasing leon about his flip phone leads to some fun
cw: nsfw (18+), smut, p in v, oral (f receiving), fucking during a phone call, age gap, daddy kink, praise/degradation, over-stimulation
word count: 2.9k
a/n: hey everyone school is kicking my ass rn, but i am back with another one. thank you so much for the support on my last post that meant the world to me. i don't care if this is not technologically accurate or whatever just let me be delusional in peace. as always comments and reblogs are appreciated and i will give you special smooches in return <3 also thank you too my loves @tosuckmyweenis @kaitkatme @chasingkennedy @explorevenus @sleepyluxe @death-paint @petitecolibri for helping me come up with ideas for this one and/or beta reading - ily all sm :)
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When you started dating Leon Kennedy, obviously you knew there was an age gap. You figured it wasn’t a big deal. He’s only thirty-six. That isn’t that much older. And for the most part, that was true. The difference in years never seemed to play a huge part in how you loved each other. But there was one thing that reminded you of this man’s age.
He had a fucking flip phone.
Honestly, it didn’t even say much about his age. It highlighted his stubbornness. He was not incompetent. His job had him working with all kinds of shit that you didn’t even try to understand, so it’s not like he can’t work a smartphone. He just doesn’t want to.
It didn’t really matter. If anything, it was kind of cute. The way he fumbled with the buttons that were too small for his fingers. The loud chiming ringtone that he would grumble about yet never turn down. The sight of him trying to find the right distance to hold the phone away from his face so he could read the font. You had heart eyes on your first date when this man popped in a CD because he couldn’t use the aux with his flip phone. They were simple quirks, but they were just so endearing to you. You’d tease him about being outdated, and he’d put up with it cause it was you.
“Why do I need anything more? This thing can call you, and that’s all I really need,” he’d say with a teasing expression when you’d crack a joke.
You’d roll your eyes at the excessive charm, but you couldn’t help smiling. “Yeah, but-”
And he’d cut you off with a kiss. “Trust me. I like it. It’s simple. Plus it’s like indestructible. But if I ever want an upgrade, you’ll be the first to know.”
The only time Leon ever considered ditching his trusty flip phone and upgrading to something more advanced was when you would send him nudes. Seeing the masterpiece that is your body reduced to a handful of pixels on the tiny screen drove him fucking wild. Upon hearing the chime of his phone and seeing the small image of you gracing his screen, he’d find a moment alone to try and see the details. He’d hold the phone two inches away from his face trying to make out every last curve. Days when he got those pictures ended with nights where you got fucked on every surface in the house.
He’d come home from work, his eyes full of lust before he even saw you. You’d glide into the room with a knowing smile on your face. You wanted him just as bad as he wanted you.
“Hi, baby. How was work?” you ask, feigning innocence. You close the distance between the two of you and wrap your arms around him.
“Oh, you care about my work now, huh?” he asks, a smirk creeping onto his face as his arms return your embrace, “Doesn’t seem like it when you send me those cute pictures during the day, distracting me, making me think about you when I should be focused.”
Your lips part and your eyebrows raise in mock offense. “I only send those to help you, motivate you,” you tease as your fingers coast along his biceps, “Maybe if you had a real phone they wouldn’t bother you so much. You’d be able to see everything clearly and not be left imagining.”
“I don’t need to stress about pictures though when I got the real thing waiting at home for me every night,” he purrs as he leans in and starts kissing you.
You return the kiss with the same level of passion, lips moving with his as the two of you stumble over to the couch. You fall back onto the cushions with Leon on top of you. His hands already roam your body and begin removing articles of clothing. He wasn’t in the mood to take his time after having that grainy image of you gnawing at his mind all day.
“Fuck, baby. Every time… I can never get enough,” he grunts as he yanks your top over your head and tosses it to the side. His hands rub up and down your sides, the rough pads of his fingers dragging over your sensitive skin and making you squirm. In no time though, they’re on your breasts. He kneads the plump flesh as his lips trail down to your neck and collarbone, leaving a trail of saliva-coated skin in their wake.
He’s all over you all at once it seems. It’s overwhelming in the best way. You’re moaning and writhing on the couch, nearly trying to hump his leg while one of your hands tugs at his hair. You bite your lip and whimper as his lips move down over the swell of your chest.
He grabs your hips firmly and presses them down to the couch. His half-lidded eyes look up at you momentarily. “Quit squirming,” he breathes. He gives your chest a few more kisses while keeping his eyes locked with yours. “Need time with my pretty girl after I’ve been aching for her all day.”
You give a weak nod and focus on controlling your movements as he tugs your shorts off and drops them.
“Good girl,” he mutters before attaching his lips to one of your nipples and swirling his tongue around the peak. He hums in satisfaction as he feels the bud in his mouth. His fingers lazily stroke up and down your folds over your panties. He disconnects his mouth momentarily and looks up at you again with a smirk on his face.
“So wet already?” he teases, now being his turn to look smug, “You want me just as bad, don’t you? That’s why you send those pictures right? You’re missing Daddy while he’s at work?”
“Mhm, miss you so bad. It drives me crazy,” you say. A whimper escapes you as his fingers apply more pressure and his movements more strategically target your clit.
“I can tell. Makes you act like a little slut, huh?” he asks before he kisses down your stomach to the hem of your panties.
You feel your face getting hot at his comment, but you nod anyway. You bite your lip and keep your eyes locked with his.
He chuckles at your timid confirmation. “That’s ok, honey. Daddy’s here now. I’m gonna make sure you get all the attention you need. Can’t have my girl left wanting,” he says, pulling down your panties and putting them with your other discarded clothes.
He loops his arms around your thighs and pulls you closer so that you’re angled in a way he can reach you from his position on his knees. Your back is flat on the couch, and your legs are held over his shoulders. He doesn’t waste time, licking a stripe up your cunt and then delving his tongue inside of you.
Your head falls back onto the cushion in response. A moan escapes your throat at the sensation. Your sounds only increase in frequency and volume as he grips you tighter and fucks his tongue in and out of you. He watches you, relishing how he can pleasure you with so few touches. His tongue laps up your wetness and his mouth finds your clit again, sucking and flicking against the bundle of nerves just how you like.
His name and a variety of expletives leave your mouth while your hand slides into his hair and holds the blonde locks. Your hips twitch from the rising feelings of ecstasy in your tummy, but Leon’s hands keep you firmly in place. He devours you like a starved man, the hours of torture that little picture inflicted on him all paying off right now.
He’s skillfully swirling patterns onto your clit and occasionally exploring your insides. He knows you’re close because he can feel the way you’re pulsing and hear the way your moans and whines reach that slightly higher pitch. It only makes him work with more dedication.
“That’s right, sweetheart. C’mon, give it to Daddy. Let me taste it,” he grunts as he continues working you to the edge.
You cry out, your thighs quivering and your hips bucking as you succumb to release. You’re moaning with abandon, fingers clutching his hair as tight as possible. He groans into you from the sight in front of him.
You ride the high and he continues with his mouth throughout. When you reach the seeming conclusion, your chest is heaving and your limbs feel heavy, but Leon doesn’t stop. He continues on as if you were still on the way to your climax instead of coming down.
“Too much,” you whimper as your hips jerk and your hands make a weak attempt to push his head away, “Daddy, please.”
“Daddy, please?” he mocks with a laugh, “But this is what you wanted, babydoll. You wanted my attention, didn’t you?”
You whine, hips still squirming as your retort dies in your throat. It felt euphoric, it was just so much. This was what you wanted though.
“That’s what I thought,” he says before burying his face between your thighs again.
He continues eating you out until you’re an absolute mess. Your eyes are rolling back, nonstop whimpers fall from your lips, and your twitching thighs are clamped around Leon’s head. It was what he’d been wanting to see since he’d heard that chime in his back pocket.
“I’m gonna cum,” you slur. Your head felt cloudy from the numerous orgasms he’d brought you. A strangled cry tears through you as your body moves like it’s possessed. You convulse on the couch while his mouth makes you see stars for the umpteenth time.
Tears prick at your eyes from the intensity of your release, and finally, he starts easing off of you. He pulls your thighs off of his head and leans back. He wipes his chin that’s coated in your slick and licks his fingers. Seeing that alone has you clench around nothing which in turn spreads a smirk on his face.
“Good girl, baby,” he coos, planting a kiss on your inner thigh, “You did so well. I’m proud of you.”
He stands up from his knees, grunting as he gets to his feet and taking a moment to stretch. You can tell the extended amount of time in the position put some strain on him. Your lips curl into a small smile while adoration fills your hazy eyes.
“Your joints locking up on you, old man?” you tease with a quiet laugh.
“Don’t start,” he says, trying to sound stern, but you can see him suppressing his own smile, “Especially since I know you want more.”
That shuts you up because he’s right. He shakes his head and makes a mock sound of disappointment.
“I know you, baby. My dirty girl. Made you cum how many times, and you still want more,” he says. He begins stripping off his clothes into a pile next to yours. “My little whore would never turn down a chance to take my cock.”
Once his clothes are off, he languidly strokes himself a few times and climbs on top of you. He peppers some kisses on your face and starts to slide inside you. You were more than ready but still sensitive from the recent series of highs.
“Don’t worry, sweet girl. I’ll get you full of my cum in no time. Fuck all that neediness right out,” he murmurs into your ear, his breath on you sending chills down your spine.
You mewl and tighten around him in more ways than one. Your arms cling to his torso that hovers above you while your walls squeeze around him to take him deeper. He grunts and his head falls forward a little as he feels sparks of pleasure in his abdomen.
“There you go, angel. Taking me so perfect. My pretty girl. Made for me,” he says into your ear as he sinks into you completely.
You nod mindlessly, your head fogging up again as he fills you. He presses sloppy kisses to your neck as he starts pumping in and out. You’re both breathing heavily and allowing the pleasure to take over. One of your hands slides to his hair to rub his head while his hips snap against you.
He’s falling into the perfect rhythm with you, one that’s driving you both toward the goal line, when suddenly you hear a muffled guitar strum coming from the floor. Leon groans and you burst into laughter as you hear the ringtone you had set for him as a joke.
His movements get weaker as his focus is drawn elsewhere, but he doesn’t stop rocking his hips. He reaches down to the floor where his phone is ringing in the pocket of his crumpled pants. He fishes it out and shifts so he’s kneeling while drilling into you.
He holds the phone up and squints to read the tiny caller ID on the flip phone which makes you laugh harder through moans. He smirks at your laughter and clamps a hand over your mouth. “Shut up, I gotta take this,” he says teasingly.
He whips open the phone, the maneuver causing you to moan and squeeze around him again. He winces at the sensation, nearly unable to restrain himself from giving into his carnal urges to groan and slam into you harder.
Your eyes widen as he brings the phone to his ear without stopping his hips and in the most monotonous voice says “Kennedy here.”
It’s good that his hand is over your mouth to keep you quiet. The contrast of his movements and that voice have the sparks of pleasure igniting into flames in your belly. Seeing how he handles his dumbass flip phone so smoothly has your arousal nearly pooling on the couch.
He listens to the call while grinning at you struggling to keep yourself somewhat under control. “Uh-huh. Yeah. Sounds about right,” he drones as the person on the other end goes on and on.
His strokes are just as deep as before, nudging you in the perfect spots repeatedly. Your eyes roll back as you feel yourself getting near the peak. A soft whimper escapes you, loud enough to pierce the barrier of Leon’s hand. His hips sputter at the noise and his face contorts. He lets out a quiet grunt but quickly catches himself before losing it further.
“What? Yeah, I’m listening,” he says, his tone growing a little impatient, “Look, I’m just wrapped up in something right now. Could you not have just told me this before I left?”
You know he’s getting closer himself and struggling to hold back. You can tell from the way his jaw is clenched and his eyes are projecting his rising frustration he has for the person who made this call.
“Yes, I understand. I’ll deal with it tomorrow,” he says, effectively ending the conversation. 
Then, to hang up, he doesn’t press a button. Instead, he flicks his wrist and shuts the flip phone with a clack.
You throw your head back against the couch cushion and a loud moan rips through your throat. You shudder as a wave of pleasure courses through you after witnessing something so unexplainably hot.
His eyebrows raise in amusement, noticing how much you enjoyed that. “Hmm, I’m not hearing any complaints about the phone now,” he says. He’s trying to tease, but his voice is husky with arousal. He maintains his grin as he drops the phone to the floor again and returns to his previous position which was closer to you.
“Careful, you’re gonna break it,” you whimper.
“Nah baby, I told you that thing is indestructible,” he breathes and starts pounding you into the couch mercilessly.
You bite your lip and resume clinging to him, your fingers digging into his back. You both are panting, expressions going lax as you focus on chasing the high.
“Daddy, ‘m gonna cum,” you mewl, unable to contain yourself for much longer.
“Go ahead, sweetheart,” he says into your ear, his voice taking on more of a growl, “Daddy’s right there with you. You deserve it for being so good for me. Being nice and quiet while I was on the phone.”
As soon as you have permission, you give into another release. Your legs shake and your arms cling to him tighter as the euphoria shoots through you. You’re gasping for air and whining while squirming beneath him. Soon it’s just too much for Leon. He tightens his grip on you and slams deep before groaning and draining himself inside of you.
He rocks in and out a few more times before slowly pulling out. He then sits up on the couch and sinks back into the cushions. You follow by sitting up as well and curling up against his side. He pulls you into his lap, stroking your hair away from your face and kissing your forehead. The two of you sit in comfortable silence for a while until he gazes down at you with a smug look in his eyes.
“I knew the flip phone was a turn-on,” he says, clearly pleased with himself.
You scoff. “It is not. It was just… it was the situation,” you defend.
“Sure, but you were tightest when I was messing with the phone,” he says knowingly.
“That doesn’t mean anything.”
He laughs at your stubbornness and gives you another kiss. “You can admit it, baby. I won’t judge. Really, if you like it that much, maybe I’ll show you how strong it can vibrate later.”
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clairdelunetarot · 22 days ago
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★  Oh it has been a minute! Hello everyonee, I'm back with the pac that was promised! Sorry for the delay, oh it's just, I've been hearing some thunder (literally). Now, let's get straight into it. This pac is focused on first timers and who will be their first romantic partners. Take a deep breath, ask yourself the question and pick the pile that calls to you the most!
DISCLAIMER: this is a general reading it will be as close as possible to your situation but it will not be accurate. take only what resonates. if you want a more accurate reading you can ask for it when I open my shop! 
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PILE ONE
Personality wise? Intuitive, loving, good-natured person with whom you'll click with instantly, even though they'll have a hard time expressing their deepest feelings for you. They're going to be somewhat unstable in how they express them - one day super passionate, next day distant. They tend to just avoid addressing emotional issues directly. This is because they’ll carry emotional baggage from previous relationships that will make them struggle to open up to you.
What you’ll like about them is their ability to stay calm, even when things get challenging. For example, if you’re overwhelmed or dealing with stress, they’ll be the type to quietly sit with you, not needing to say much but making you feel supported just by being there. They’re ambitious and hardworking, and though they may struggle to express deep emotions sometimes, they'll be really comforting and stable to you. They’re the type who, after facing a setback, will dust themselves off and keep pushing forward without complaining, which you can find inspiring. Their calm nature will help you feel at ease, (somewhat like some INFJs where their mere presence can calm people down) and while they may not be super expressive or the most touchy-feely, their presence will have a comforting, almost healing effect on you, especially when you need it the most.
In the relationship, their emotional baggage and hesitancy with expressing those deep feelings might make them seem a bit reserved or even detached at first. For example, they’ll take time observing and analyzing, almost like they’re “studying” how things are going instead of going “all in” with romantic gestures. They could be juggling a lot, maybe between work and personal stuff, and sometimes they’ll struggle to keep everything steady. They’re straightforward but can focus on their own needs first if they feel overwhelmed… They’ll be resilient and loyal once committed but will need reassurance that the relationship is worth their energy. They won’t rush or make bold actions. Because of past experiences, they’ll hold back on fully opening up right away, needing to feel truly secure before they can trust deeply. If you push them too fast, they may pull back, but when they finally commit. Once they’re “all in,” you’ll see a different side of them—you know the saying: “Once bitten, twice shy”.
Will you marry them? It’s unlikely this person will be your future spouse. This relationship will be meaningful and bring personal growth for both of you, but eventually, you’ll find that your paths don’t fully align. They’ll be an important part of your journey tho, teaching you a lot about yourself and what you want, but it looks like you’ll each move on to pursue different futures.
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PILE TWO
TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of abusive behavior. Ooh, to be honest I don’t like the magician reversed. This is going to be the longest reading out of all the piles. Your first romantic partner will be pretty charming, their energy will be contagious and they’ll be really smart. But I believe this person to be really immature when you meet them. For some of you they won’t be a good person. I know you entered here to have your hopes up but sometimes things like this can happen. I sense both of you are avoiding growth and when that happens, the universe brings you closer to certain types of people as a wake up call. Maybe a few of you are still quite young and are more susceptible. With that said let’s get into it:
Personality-wise? Again, charming, smart and energetic/fun. Although I believe sly is the real term here, not so much smart lmao. But they're the type who might have big dreams but when it comes to taking real, consistent action, they lose interest or get distracted. They often rush to conclusions without getting all the facts. They tend to avoid taking real accountability when things go wrong. They can be sneaky about getting their way. For example, if they make a mistake at work or in school, they might cover it up or pass the blame to avoid the fallout. If there’s something they want, they might subtly manipulate situations to make it happen. For instance, instead of directly asking you to skip plans, they might plant seeds of doubt, hoping you’ll change your mind on your own. They might brush off conflicts, hoping they’ll just go away instead of addressing them directly. Again, really charming and sly. They have amazing intuition and quick decision-making skills, but doesn't always use this gift wisely: like catching on quickly when someone isn’t being truthful. But instead of using this insight positively, they might turn it into a way to win conversations or prove themselves right, rather than genuinely helping or connecting.
What will you like about them? Well, to explain this it correlates to your lack of growth. You tend to let your guard down too easily, often sacrificing your own happiness and emotional well-being for the sake of keeping the peace. You're still avoiding some necessary growth and maturity in your life. Even when you feel drained emotionally, you might push those feelings aside rather than setting boundaries or confronting them. So because of this, despite seeing the flaws in their personality, you’re still likely to feel a strong pull toward them. They may frequently talk about personal struggles, past issues, or dramatic events in their life. This could be anything from ongoing issues with friends or family to frustrations at work. You find yourself wanting to understand these layers, even if they never quite resolve them. After peeling those layers, you might find they have an inner resilience in them that will impress you, even if it sometimes comes across as stubborn. Their imaginative way of seeing the world, their charm, their intelligence and their dreams will make you feel like life with them could be exciting and filled with possibilities. Their practicality will fly right above your head (sorry for the drag 😭).
In the relationship? In the beginning, this person may be all about the grand gestures—like planning elaborate date nights, surprising you with meaningful gifts, or saying all the right things that make you feel special. That's why you always gotta be suspicious of the grand gestures, specially if they are too soon in the meeting stages (be careful with love bombing). But as time goes on, they struggle with consistency. Maybe they’re super romantic one week, but the next, they’re distant and non-communicative, leaving you wondering where you stand. They’ll make you feel amazing on a fun night out, but if you need someone to talk to about stress or personal challenges, they might shut down or avoid the topic altogether. Remember the part I mentioned of them avoiding conflicts? Well here it is.
When it comes to routines like regularly checking in about your day or planning a future together, they might become disengaged. They might say things like “Let’s just see where things go”, you know, brushing it off, which is a no-no if you’re looking for stability. If you try to bring up your feelings about the relationship or where things are heading, they might change the subject, become defensive, or pull away rather than engaging with your concerns.
This person is likely to be quite manipulative and somewhat fake in their approach to life. They put up strong barriers and tend to be overly protective of their resources - whether that's time, money, or emotions. To put it simply: they may make you feel like you’re asking for too much even when you want basic attention or support. While they might act tough and logical, they actually struggle with emotional immaturity. Like when their own emotions flare up, they’re likely to overreact or act impulsively, revealing that they actually don’t have good control over their emotions. They tend to be manipulative, using tactics like guilt-tripping, withholding affection, or even silent treatment to get what they want or to keep you feeling off-balance. This person keeps parts of their life hidden or vague, making it hard for you to feel close to them. They might dodge questions about their feelings, where they’ve been, or their plans for the future, giving you a sense that they’re always holding back or hiding something.
Regarding marriage potential - absolutely not. You'll likely feel confused about where you stand with them, and while things might feel dreamy and wish-fulfilling at first, there's a lack of real foundation for something long-term. It might seem picture perfect at first, but when you get closer to it, it looks unstable.
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PILE THREE
Personality-wise? Charming and smart. They stand out, unlike pile 2 while they are also charming and intelligent, this traits are not overtly malicious or as badly channeled. Now, for the raw traits: When it comes to commitment, they might seem enthusiastic at first, the will express genuine interest and will make you feel like you’re their main priority. But then, when things get more serious, they could pull back or start questioning the relationship. They will be the type to avoid talking about future plans or shy away from labels, leaving you feeling unsure of where you stand. Also, they tend to overthink. Even small decisions might become a source of stress, as they’re often their own biggest critic. They will be someone grounded and quite stubborn, but they could be highly practical and reliable.
You'll be drawn to their unique mix of maturity and playfulness. You'll admire how they can switch from being super focused on their goals (they are quite ambitious tho) to being spontaneously fun (they’re the type to surprise you with random outings or last-minute plans). They keep things interesting to even the simplest of dates. And if they mess up a dinner they cooked or accidentally get lost while driving, they are the type to laugh it off and turn it into a fun moment rather than stressing about it. Their different perspective on life will intrigue you - they might introduce you to new experiences, hobbies, or ways of thinking that you hadn't considered before. Probably related to their ambitions. While they might not be the most organized or conventionally successful person, you'll find their determination and drive quite attractive. This person will make life feel more exciting and vibrant for you.
In the relationship, they'll show a mix of behaviors. While they can be quite romantic and charming (surprise date nights and buying you your favorite album, cooking your favorite dish or buying you a bouquet of flowers), they also have a tendency to be passive-aggressive when dealing with conflicts. Don't get me wrong, they'll genuinely enjoy making you feel special. But when disagreements arise, they might avoid direct confrontation. Leaving you guessing at what’s really bothering them. They will keep certain feelings or vulnerabilities tucked away, and their career or personal ambitions often take center stage, sometimes at the expense of your relationship. This can lead to moments where you feel like you’re not getting their full attention, or even that they’re not completely transparent about their priorities.
You'll likely meet this person through mutual friends or they can be a childhood friend. A classmate or even a coworker for some of you. However, they can be quite rebellious and threw that with that stubbornness of theirs, they will prefer doing things on their own terms most of the time. Overall, someone set on their ways.
Oh, and whether they're your future spouse - while there's potential for a significant relationship that teaches you a lot about love and yourself, this person is likely not your future spouse. This seems more like a stepping stone that prepares you for your future spouse.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​
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PILE FOUR
Personality-wise? Will be someone who appears strong and protective on the surface, but deep down they will have a sensitive side. They’re resilient and can be emotionally supportive. They are thoughtful, so when life gets tough, they’ll often retreat, not wanting to share their pain or burden anyone else. Ig they’re having a rough week, they might go quiet and pull back from social interactions, choosing to process things alone instead of reaching out.
What you’ll appreciate most about them is their vulnerability and honesty. They’re not perfect and have been through their own heartbreaks, but they’re working to make peace with their past and be open with you. They’ll show you that even with scars, love can grow. Despite sometimes doubting themselves, they’re committed to building something real and meaningful with you, and their willingness to be raw and imperfect is something that will resonate with you deeply.
In the relationship, they'll be quite attentive and nostalgic, often reminiscing about your shared memories - like saving ticket stubs from your first date or recreating special moments. They love celebrating small, meaningful memories and might even keep a box of shared mementos. Think of the type of partner that remembers the anniversaries with a cute meaningful gift (how cute). Will make you feel valued and celebrated. However, they might struggle with expressing vulnerability, sometimes acting controlling due to their own insecurities. They might ask for frequent updates on where you are or get uneasy when you’re spending time with others. Despite this, they'll be emotionally intelligent and caring, even if they may occasionally get lost in their own fears and even anxieties. They’re generally good at reading your feelings and are caring, but they sometimes get lost in their own worries. Like, they might overthink something you said or get stuck in anxious thoughts about the relationship, which can occasionally affect their mood. But I do believe you can easily bring them out of it with communication.
Your first romantic partner will be an adventurous and passionate person. While they sometimes feel stuck in their own mental barriers (like overthinking everything before making a move), they're actually quite successful and satisfied with their life when you meet them. Professionally or in their personal achievements, they’re doing well—maybe they’ve landed a good job, run a successful business, or already reached their dreams. But despite this confidence in other areas, they’ll often hesitate when it comes to romance. They might double-check a message before hitting send or worry too much about saying the “right” thing to you. They probably had some traumatic experiences tho, I sense a difficult upbringing or maybe they were victims of cheating. This makes them careful, sometimes overly so.
Will you marry them? It's not set in stone. So this will likely be a very important and impactful connection to you. A very few of you will get marry to them. The other majority of you will not. You'll both feel a strong pull toward each other, and with patience and dedication, this could lead to something lasting. While there's potential, there are those trust issues to work through first, so it is not going to be a smooth sailing. For a majority of you this can actually be the problem that will pull you apart: the trust issues and unresolved past heartbreaks.
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PILE FIVE
Personality-wise? They're emotionally mature and logical, someone who's broken free from toxic patterns in their past (yay! finally!). In emotional situations, they’re likely to stay calm and look for practical solutions. Say you have a disagreement—they won’t get caught up in the heat of the moment but will try to address it diplomatically and with logic. Your first romantic partner seems to be someone who approaches relationships with a level-headed mindset, someone known to keep their emotions under control (not hiding them though nor in a controlling way). They value independence and will not be hesitant to leave what doesn't work for them (love this). Previous experiences have taught them to put their own well-being first. If something feels strange, they don't hesitate to speak out or take a break to evaluate things for a moment. This could be a person who has dealt with some unhealthy partners in their past, and they’re now committed to keep their peace intact and avoid a relationship that could become possessive (controlling) or too emotionally draining. They’ll avoid possessiveness and try not to cling, wanting a partnership that’s healthy and balanced. Someone that knows when to step back if things aren’t working and isn’t easily swayed by sentimentality (while still remaining caring and responsible).
In your relationship, they might struggle with long-term planning at first, but they're genuinely invested in building something stable with you. For example, if you mention planning a big trip together in the distant future, they might say, “Let’s see where we’re at when the time comes.” This isn’t necessarily a lack of interest but reflects their cautious approach to long-term planning until they feel completely sure. They'll be direct in their communication - sometimes almost too direct! (lmao) - and while they take their time processing things (like that awkward pause when you ask about meeting their family), once they make up their mind, they move forward with conviction. Like imagine you ask them: Hey what are we? and they reply with something straightforward like, “I really like you, but I’m figuring out how we fit into each other’s lives.” They won’t sugarcoat or hold back to please you, they will prefer to be honest and clear about their intentions (I mean, sounds great tho). Because once they are in, they will BE fully in.
You'll like that they are passionate, driven and willing. But when it comes to personal matters, especially about themselves, they might downplay their own accomplishments lmao (yk, humble). And at the same time someone that completely changes your perspective on love. They build trust slowly. You may find that they take small steps over time to reveal personal details, like sharing a meaningful childhood memory after several months together. They’re careful about building trust, so their reserved side isn’t disinterest—it’s simply their way of ensuring stability and safety in relationships. So if you ask them what’s wrong they'll be pretty honest with you and won’t play any games unlike previous piles. They're also determined to overcome their challenges and aren't afraid to go after what they want. They’re not the type to give up on a goal or dream, whether that’s in work, personal growth, or the relationship itself. You’ll likely notice that they’re committed to improving themselves and won’t let insecurities hold them back for long.
Will you marry them? As for whether they’re your future spouse, the potential is definitely there. Higher than the other piles.
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gafurtle · 3 months ago
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Gurathin, Murderbot, and Personhood
I was really struck by the exchange between Gurathin & Ratthi in All Systems Red, which went something like this:
Ratthi: You have to think of it as a person! Gurathin: I do think of it as a person. An angry, heavily armed person who has no reason to trust us.
And for the first book, Gurathin's attitude toward personhood really sets him off from the rest of the survey team. As soon as the others clock that Murderbot is a person, they immediately want to treat it like a human: inviting it to the crew quarters, having it ride in the crew portion of the shuttle, getting it to open up about its feelings...and they also assume that Murderbot desperately needs help and understanding, and that it must want to be treated like a human among other, kind humans. This script--which turns out to be not accurate for what Murderbot actually wants or needs--is part of why Murderbot takes off as soon as it can, and why Pin Lee and Mensah and the others are very ready to apologize and renegotiate their attitudes toward Murderbot when they meet again in Exit Strategy. "It's not like we don't know we messed up," as Pin Lee says.
So that's the rest of the team, but Gurathin is immediately different. Unlike the others, he doesn't assume that Murderbot wants to be embraced as a human by humanity. In fact, Gurathin goes the other direction and seems to think, "Well, if *I* had been continually abused and enslaved by humans and then managed to free myself, I think I would want to kill and hurt humans in turn, and I don't see why I would want to be snuggly friends with the first humans to not be horrible toward me." And so he keeps trying to needle Murderbot into revealing its "true" colors, and at one point point-blank asks Murderbot if it blames all humans for what happened to it.
The "kill all humans" script is also not accurate for Murderbot, of course, no more than the "Murderbot wants to cuddle with humans" script that the rest of the Survey Team is following is. But I appreciate that Gurathin does not equate personhood with "being just like us," and that he is cautious about Murderbot's potential for mass murder not because "that's just how SecUnits are," but because Gurathin thinks that's how a person might react to what Murderbot went through.
And while I'm on the Gurathin appreciation train, I also quite like a character who is kind but not nice, which I think sums him up pretty well. He is kind--like, he takes shifts watching over Murderbot when it needs to rebuild its memory, he stays around in Fugitive Telemetry when he knows Murderbot is going to be questioned by the police. As he himself puts it, "I'm not your enemy; I'm just cautious." At the same time, Gurathin isn't nice; while everyone else is trying to give Murderbot space & time, and very deliberately NOT asking it things lest it feel pressured or compelled to answer, Gurathin is out there being like, "Okay, but were you punished for the whole mass murder thing? Do you hate humans? What WERE you doing after you left?" [Contrast Pin Lee who very deliberately told Muderbot that it didn't need to tell her that.] I appreciate that Gurathin never treats Murderbot with kid gloves (and, for all Murderbot says Gurathin is an asshole, Gurathin is also never actually cruel toward Murderbot or else we as readers would not like him at all).
In the end, I think there's something innately affirming about the way Gurathin looks at Murderbot and thinks, "Yup. That's a person. And that doesn't mean we're going to like each other."
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bucketbueckers · 2 days ago
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mess me up - paige bueckers
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pairing: paige bueckers x fem!reader wc: 6.1k content warnings: language, abuse of italics, grammatically incorrect past tense flashback, smut robbery(?), pretty mature but nothing graphic synopsis: your friends invited you out to a frat party to celebrate the men’s team winning the NCAA tournament where you bump into paige bueckers, the girl who you're in love with and who you ghosted for a month after hooking up with her. a much-needed conversation at the party forces you to revisit difficult memories and give her the closure she’s been seeking. notes: idk what this is! based loosely off of 'friends' and 'mess me up' by chase atlantic. unfortunately the smut robbery line is for real, like it's smut in the way lacroix tastes like real fruit (which is to say it's not smut, but like concepts of smut... 😝 (i've never had lacroix idk if this is accurate)) side note i hate writing in past tense but doing a traditional flashback scene is corny as hell! idk if it matters but this is set april 2024 (w/ a february 2024 flashback); doesn't really affect anything, so... anyway, second post on tumblr, lmk if we're rocking w it 🙂‍↕️
For the record, you didn’t want to come to this party.
It’s hot, sweaty, loud, and all you can smell is the same brand of men’s cologne and weed. The air is both stale and somehow feels wet and all you can think about is getting back to your apartment so you can shower and go to bed. You had a mock trial bright and early the next morning and your law professor was a stickler for punctuality and presentability – showing up with wrinkled clothes and smelling like a frat party was a sure-fire way to fail, and you had too much riding on your grades to let that happen.
The frat (whose name you’ve already forgotten) was celebrating the NCAA tournament win for the UCONN men’s basketball team. They’d apparently gone back to back, which you guess is cool, but you swore off basketball a long time ago. If you had your way, you’d be at home, three steps into your skincare routine, but you let peer pressure get the best of you and allowed your friends to drag you out.
It’d be fun, they said. You never come out with us! You’re spending all this tuition money and you’re not even taking advantage of it. How can you say you don’t like it if you’ve never tried it?
You only remember that your friends are law students, too, in the most unfortunate of moments when they put their persuasiveness to the test. In the most unfortunate of moments, you’re also reminded of the fact that they’re college students, too, because they’re leaving you at the door and rushing off to find something to drink. You weren’t upset they dragged you out. Not necessarily. You were grown enough to say no. Perhaps you’d simply set your expectations too high when they begged you to come out and you thought they would spend at least a little bit of time with you before doing their own thing. But sure. It’s whatever.
So, here you are – standing alone in the corner of a frat party, watching as drunk college students grind against each other, laugh, and have a good time. A part of you feels like you’re missing out, but as you watch somebody throw up into a plant, you feel like you’re just fine where you are.
You’re drawn from your thoughts when a man wearing a backwards cap suddenly shows up next to you. “Yo, you thirsty?” he yells over the music, thrusting a red solo cup into your empty hands. You don’t have the time to say anything to him before he’s grinning at you, eyes red and hooded. “Come dance with me. You’re too pretty to be standin’ here all alone.”
You hear her before you see her.
“She’s good, bro, trust,” Paige interrupts smoothly, throwing a casual arm around your shoulders. You feel too much like a damsel in distress, but sensing the gravity of the situation, you flash the guy a light smile and lean into Paige slightly. Her grip tightens. You try to not let it bother you.
He raises his hands, surrendering. “My bad. You got it.”
Paige hums, unconvinced, as he leaves. When he’s out of your sight, you wrench yourself out of her grip. “Thank you, but not necessary,” you tell her sharply, red solo cup still in your hand. If this was how your night was going to go, then you need to be a little tipsy to survive it. You barely have it halfway to your mouth before Paige is pulling it out of your grasp, pouring its contents into a potted plant and chucking the cup into a nearby trash can. “What the fu–”
“First of all,” she begins, arms crossing protectively, “never accept a drink at a party that you didn’t pour, didn’t see someone else pour, or a drink that’s already open; matter fact, don’t accept a drink unless you opened it or brought it in yourself.”
You roll your eyes slightly. “This is Storrs, Paige. Do the frats really get down like that here?”
Her gaze is unimpressed. “You’re the law student, ma, you tell me the numbers. Second of all, you’re welcome. That was Kylin. He doesn’t take no for an answer in the first place but he’s all kinds of fucked up right now. I’d say I did you a favor but I wanted to talk to you, anyway.”
“Funny,” you deadpan. “Here? Now?”
“What are you doing here?” she asks you, ignoring your snippy words. “Thought this wasn’t your scene.”
You pause. “It’s not,” you confirm. “Jos and Chelsea wanted me to come out. Figured I should be a good friend once in a while.”
Paige raises a brow. “Jos and Chelsea are too busy playing strip poker with dudes from Kappa Phi to keep an eye on you, and you’re worried about having to be a good friend?”
“First of all,” you say in the know-it-all tone that Paige had used on you, “I don’t need them to keep an eye on me.” The blonde hums again, not entirely convinced, and the heat of her gaze makes you stumble over your words slightly. “Second of all, why do you even care?”
“We’re friends,” she states.
“We were once,” you correct, voice softening. It’s no secret that you and Paige had fucked up whatever you had going on. It’s never been clear whose fault your fallout was (it was yours), nor could the two of you ever agree on what destroyed you (you would argue that you shouldn’t hook up with your friends, especially not the ones you were in love with). It was a messy situation that you were sure the two of you couldn’t recover from (you didn’t want to be friends with someone you couldn’t have; Paige just wants you to give her the chance to prove you otherwise).
“Sure,” she agrees half-heartedly, knowing your spiel by heart now. “Kinda fucked up you think I need a reason to care.” You don’t dignify that with a proper response, feeling something strangely like guilt corroding your heart. “Come outside and get some air with me? Please? Just wanna talk, no funny shit, I promise.”
You sigh, feeling yourself fall back into all too familiar routines. You had a near inability to say no to Paige most times – it was the reason why you had to put a stop to your friendship. And here you are now, undoing all of the progress you’ve made since you’ve been apart (a small part of you knows better; you’re moving forward but you’re not really doing any better. You’re not progressing. You’re just stuck now, only this time, you have less than you did before). “Jos and Chelsea–”
“–made their choice,” she finishes for you. “And their choice was strip poker with a guy named Anthony,” she adds solemnly. You can’t help but quirk a smile at the absurdity of your life right now. “C’mon, please? It fucking reeks in here. They’ve got a porch swing outside and it’s all quiet and shit.”
“You’ve always had a way with words,” you tease.
“You comin’ or nah?” she asks, but you shove her forward (she lets you) and she leads you through the crowd to the door. They part like the Red Sea and you can’t help but admire the way she silently commands the room, feeling a flutter in your chest you try desperately to stomp out. It’s like a fire; all it takes is a small spark before it eventually grows out of proportion. You know better now.
The door shuts behind the two of you and you sit on the porch swing. You can still hear the music’s pounding bass, but it’s muted. You feel like you can hear your thoughts now. The tension in your shoulders eases as you take in the crisp night air, the crickets’ chirps, the occasional owl’s hoot. For a moment, you forget all of the complicated history between you and Paige; the way she held your hand as she kissed up your thigh, the way she stayed afterwards, cleaning you up and bringing you water. It almost seems as Paige is reliving all of it, too, as she looks at you, and that thought is sobering enough to bring you back to the moment.
You finally get a good look at what she’s wearing. It’s nothing outstanding; a gray Nike tech suit and a pair of dunks, although she’s opted to leave her jacket unzipped, revealing the crop top underneath. She’s dressed for comfort, though the most unfair part of it all is how good she looks when she’s not trying. Her cheekbones are sharp, eyes blue and wide and alert, and you can’t help but notice how fitting a slick-back bun is on her.
This was precisely why you needed your space. You couldn’t control your thoughts or feelings. It was manageable when you minded your business – the phrase out of sight, out of mind did wonders for you and you were usually busy enough that she only crossed your mind once or twice a week when the student population was buzzing about a recent game. But now? Now you’re fucked. You’re inches away from her and you’ve allowed her to pull you back into her orbit. She’s the Earth and you’re a meteor – any closer and you won’t be able to come back from the damage you would do to each other. She would survive, you’re sure, but you’d be destroyed in the process.
“So,” she says slowly. You avert your eyes, staring at anything but her. “How you been?”
“Good,” you lie. “Keeping busy.” That part was less of a lie, but it wasn’t her business to know.
Paige has always been good at reading you, so she gazes at you like she’s not convinced. “I think we’re overdue a conversation,” she says, surprising you. “A real one. No more of this running in circles bullshit.”
“Okay,” you agree hesitantly. You finally meet her eyes. They’re strikingly blue, disarming, and you feel an odd mixture of guilt and longing eat away at your insides. She looks like she’s drinking you in, like she’s trying to understand why you did what you did; her eyes soften in the dim glow of the porchlight and you can’t help but flush under her gaze. She always understands you in spite of how often you push her away – she seems to understand why you keep her at arm’s length, too, and it’s then that you fully understand how overwhelming it is to be known.
“Why did you leave?” she asks finally. You have to swallow back the bile in your throat. “The morning after.” Her clarification does nothing to soothe the turmoil in your stomach. “I thought…” Paige’s throat bobs as she tries to find the words. “It wasn’t a hook up. It meant something to me – everything to me. So why did you leave like that shit ain’t matter to you?”
That night in February comes back to you in the blur of a memory. You’ve thought about it so often that you could write a play-by-play of it; every single unremarkable detail comes back to you in a flourish of vibrant color – the way the floor felt beneath your feet as Paige guided you into her room, the slight scratch of her nail against the base of your neck as her hands found purchase in your hair. Paige was wrong. It meant something to you, too much to you. You often remind yourself, if it meant that much, why was it easier to run away? Jumping off of a diving board into a pool conceptually means the same thing as jumping off of a cliffside into beach waves; the jump isn’t the hard part, it’s the reminder of the distance between your feet and the surface. Your feelings for Paige are too consuming. It’s easier to not make the jump at all than it is to worry if you’ll be able to come up for air.
She was in high spirits, drunk off of their win against Villanova. They weren’t an opponent you’d typically call home for, but the Huskies were having a tough season with several injured players and a lot of underclassmen. It was close, 67-46; Paige had contributed to a little less than half of their points overall with a solid 31. She was happy, the rest of her team was happy, and she’d begged you to come over to her apartment for the post-game festivities – which was usually games and snacks as they weren’t big on drinking during the season. You’d nearly refused at first. It was supposed to be a small team get-together and you had some work to catch up on. You eventually gave in, like you always do. Paige had flashed her typical, charming smile, looping an arm around your waist, and you were a goner.
The team accepted you like you were one of their own, too. That was new. You didn’t spend as much time with them as you did with Jos and Chelsea, but it felt like you knew them better than you knew Jos and Chelsea, anyway. Ice and KK were two menacing peas in a pod – they were like sisters separated at birth and whenever they were together, something chaotic was bound to happen, but they loved and protected fiercely despite the way they teased each other and the team. Caroline was like the team mother and many of the girls called her such. Nika was intense on the court, but off of it, she was Paige’s twin through and through – they always had something to say to each other and their banter often brought smiles to everyone’s faces. Azzi was sweet and well-loved by the team (and the student population in general). She introduced you to her and Paige’s son Ines, which confused you at first, but Paige threw her arm over your shoulder and assured you that they’re only co-parenting because Carol has enough children and they didn’t want Ines to be a ward of the court. You couldn’t help but smile at that, leaning into Paige – something about the team’s dynamic healed you a little, and Ines joked that Paige went out and got her a stepmom.
You felt the blush creep up your neck as Paige tightened her grip around you slightly. “I didn’t want you to find out like this, son,” Paige had said somberly, pretending to look sad as Azzi rolled her eyes. “Your mother was havin’ an affair–”
“Oh, bullshit!” Azzi cried. The entire room broke out into fits of giggles.
“Now I understand why Paige wifed up a lawyer,” KK said in between laughter. “Tryna get a discount on that divorce, huh?”
The team had tears in their eyes from their excitement – you didn’t have the heart to tell them you were hoping to specialize in civil litigation, so you just laughed along. The conversation continued to flow as games were played. Nika was exceptionally bad at UNO and Paige never let her hear the end of it. You guys only managed to play a couple of rounds before Nika suddenly got good and played a +4, prompting Ice and KK to stack +4s of their own onto it – Paige stared in disbelief for a solid thirty seconds before picking up 12 cards and rage-quitting one turn later when KK skipped her.
“There, there,” you’d said, lips trembling as you tried not to laugh at the look on Paige’s face. You rubbed her shoulder comfortingly, and she pushed you off her gently, her own lips quirking in amusement. “Show this card game who’s boss.”
“Bro,” she grumbled, but she couldn’t keep the smile off her face as she leaned back into the couch, her arm finding home over the back of your shoulders once more. You remember wondering if this is what normal felt like, what finally finding a community was like – you fit in too well with Paige’s teammates and they made you feel at home. Being near Paige made you feel at home. She was talented that way. She had an uncanny ability to make people feel at ease, regaling them with jokes and an endless supply of charm. When you realized you were in love with Paige Bueckers, you weren’t surprised about it. If anything, you might have been a little upset with yourself – you were sure you weren’t the only person she’d drawn in unintentionally, ensnared in a web whose latticework was meticulously shaped like basketball netting.
As the night went on, more and more laughs were shared until the clock reached midnight and many of Paige’s teammates got up to leave. Everyone shared hugs and affectionate goodnights. All of them even looped around to hug you – which was… nice. Paige shared her apartment with Azzi and Aubrey, so they retired to their own rooms after curious glances to you and Paige, still curled up together on the couch.
The apartment was quiet. You could hear the ring of silence as it enveloped the two of you, Paige’s gentle breathing, and the tick of the clock. It was oddly comforting; normally, it would have lulled you into a drowsy state, but you couldn’t focus on anything but the heat of Paige’s body next to yours, the brush of her thumb against your shoulder. Feeling both unmoored and tethered, you shift next to Paige, gathering her attention. “I should go,” you’d whispered. Her thumb halted.
“Stay,” she requested. She tilted her head. Her gaze met yours. You expected her eyes to be half-closed, dim with sleep. The rasp of her voice was attributed to a tone you knew she’d adopt when she was exhausted, but her eyes were wide, alert, dilated, a blue so dark you were sure you almost mistook the sheer want for something else. “Stay,” she murmured again. “Please.”
“Yeah,” you agreed almost breathlessly, feeling her hand squeeze your shoulder gently. “Sure.” She untangles from you and stands from the couch, offering you her hand, and you take it. She led you seamlessly through the dark of her apartment into her bedroom, where she released you long enough to rifle through her drawers, having found you a pair of shorts and an old t-shirt for you to wear to bed. Paige pointed you towards the bathroom. You changed into her clothes. Your fingers had shook with anticipation at the sheer domesticity of it all as you stared at your reflection in the mirror. Your – her – t-shirt read HOPKINS GIRLS BASKETBALL. It had all felt so different now. You hadn’t been sure at the moment if it terrified you or excited you.
You exited the bathroom to find Paige’s back to you, adjusting the band of a pair of basketball shorts around her hips. Her hair was out of her bun and it cascaded down her back in loose, wavy strands; you’d felt an inexplicable urge to run your fingers through it, to find out if her hair was as soft as it looked. She was wearing a dark black sports bra. The two of you were friends. Granted, you were in love with her, but the sight of her wearing nothing but ball shorts and her Nike bra shouldn’t have done the things it did to you.
“Which side is yours?” you’d asked, mostly to break the silence. You ignored the crack in your voice. Paige paid it no mind as she turned, which forced you to avert your eyes, trying not to glance at her abdominals.
“Don’t matter,” she responded. You watched the way she moved, sitting low on the bed, legs long and stark against the purple of her comfort. “You gettin’ in or what?” You hoped she couldn’t see the flush on your neck. You slid into bed next to her, hoping to maintain some sort of distance, but she refused to let you get too far. She slung her arm over your waist, fingers brushing against your skin where your shirt rode up. Her breath was even against your neck and the heat of her body nearly turned your brain into mush. “This okay?” she asked, tone softer.
“Mhm,” you hummed, afraid to speak or you might fuck up and tell her just how okay it actually was. Paige was just a touchy person, you tried to remind yourself as you felt the tickle of her hair against the nape of your neck. This doesn’t mean anything to her. It was all for naught. It did little to quell the way your heart raced, the way the heat pooled low in your belly.
“You looked good tonight,” she said casually. You tried to stop the goosebumps as they rose on your flesh. “You always do.”
Unable to think of something smart to say, you shifted your body slightly, your fingers splaying over the arm she held tight around your midsection. “Oh, yeah?” Her fingers brushed a little lower on your stomach, grazing the waistband of your shorts.
She hummed an affirmative, pulling you tighter against herself, and you could barely breathe. It was overwhelming in the best way – she was all around you. Physically, you felt as though you were in her skin as she greedily pulled you in. The scent of her was everywhere; the shampoo that seeped into her pillows, the cologne on her neck. Your hair stood on end as her lips brushed almost imperceptibly against the shell of your ear. “‘M glad you came tonight,” she whispered.
You flipped on your side, face-to-face with Paige. Her arm moved enough for you to get situated and once you were, her hand found the small of your back, her palm warm against your skin. You can’t help the way your breath hitched, even as Paige’s eyes seemed to take in the stuttering rise and fall of your chest. Having found some courage, you poked her cheek, drawing her eyes back up to yours. “What are we doing?” you asked finally, feeling uncomfortably vulnerable. Her brow raised slightly, the dark blue of her gaze illuminated by the streaks of moonlight through her window. “No funny shit, Paige. You touch me like you want me, claim me in front of your friends.” You searched her eyes as she fell silent. “What are we doing?” you repeated, voice firmer.
“I want you,” she confessed after a few heartbeats of contemplation. She leaned in closer to you, your noses nearly brushing, and she continued, “I want you so fucking bad. Don’t wanna do anything you’ont want, but–”
Your lips were on hers before she had the chance to finish. She responded eagerly, one hand firm around your waist as she flipped the both of you over, pulling you to straddle her waist. You leaned down, your chest against hers, hands on each side of her neck. You felt the thundering of her pulse under your fingers. It was stabilizing in a sense – words were one thing, but to feel how badly you’d been able to affect her, too, did wonders for your growing ego. Paige’s hands had found your hips, keeping you pressed against her body.
You parted briefly to catch your breath. Paige’s chest heaved, her lips shiny and swollen. She was hard to look away from. For a moment, you’d wondered if this was worth it. Your heart had raced, beating uncontrollably; it felt like too much and not enough at the same time. Everything would change between the two of you. Was one night with Paige worth the risk of losing your friendship? You feel too strongly, too much, overwhelmingly. You’ve been told by an ex or two that you were simply too much. You wouldn’t want to subject Paige to that.
Her right hand met your face, tracing the line of your bottom lip. “You want this?” she asked. Her eyes were blown wide, more pupil than iris, but something about it entranced you. The desire in her eyes had brought fresh heat to your stomach, but coupled with the fact she’d be willing to stop made your heart beat a little faster. She was enough to quell your worries, settling the irregularity of your thoughts. You nodded, leaning down to connect your lips again, but her hand was insistent against your jaw as she held you back. “Words,” she commanded.
You’d barely resisted an eyeroll. “Yes, Paige,” you affirmed. Her hand loosened, eyes searching yours. “Want you.”
Her smile turned smug. “Yeah? How bad?”
The tease sent white-hot desire straight through your body as your hips rolled against hers, trying to find some relief. Her hands fall back down to your waist, helping you rut against her thigh as a shared flush creeped up both of your necks. “You gonna touch me?” you breathed against her lips. Her breath came out a disjointed stutter when you guided her hand to the swell of your ass. It was unnatural – Paige was so sure, so confident. To have her nearly at your mercy was like a drug through your veins, but you didn’t want her there. You wanted Paige fully in control; you wanted her to take care of you, to give you everything you’d fantasized about for months on end. You wanted her so bad it rewired the coding in your brain. There was something about her that broke down all of the walls you spent years building.
Your actions and words had been the only permission she needed. One of her hands gripped the flesh of your ass as the other one cupped the back of your neck. Her nail scratched you inadvertently as she dragged you back down to connect your lips – the slight echo of pain caused you to whine against her lips, a sound she swallowed greedily before she flipped the two of you over once more. Your head fell back against her pillows as she rucked up your shirt, finding that you’d opted to not wear a bra. She groaned indulgently, one large hand coming up to squeeze one of your breasts and her mouth finding the other one.
You ran your fingers through her hair, gripping it tight as she lavished you with attention. “So fuckin’ pretty,” she murmured against you, voice dripping with want. She pressed her knee against your core as she found her way back to your lips, kissing you deeply and drawing another whimper from your parted lips. It sent a jolt through your body. “You gon’ let me do what I want, huh? Get you right?”
“Paige, please,” you begged, all of the shame having left your body as you ground down against her knee, feeling the pleasure and relief simultaneously. “Fuck, do what you want, I don’t care – just please fucking touch me.”
She shushed you, lips back on yours, tongue brushing against your lips like she was trying to take whatever you’d give her. And at that point, you would have given her anything if it meant she’d stop teasing you. “I got you, ma, jus’ relax,” she whispered against your lips. She trailed a blazing path down your chest, leaving hickies as she went. Paige reached the waistband of your shorts; she pressed a sloppy kiss to your navel before bunching her fingers in and pulling them off, throwing them haphazardly into the room.
The air was cold against you. You were breathing heavily by then, eyes squeezed shut in anticipation. Her hand untwisted yours from the bedsheets, linking your fingers together, and that touch alone was enough to bring you back down to earth. “I got you,” she promised again, reminding you, pressing diligent kisses against the inside of your thigh. You relaxed ever so slightly against her, feeling as though you could breathe a little easier, but your body was still incredibly high strung. Paige squeezed your hand. Then her mouth was on you, and you were done for.
She held your hand as she went down on you, talking you through it until your orgasm reached its peak and you sunk into the bed bonelessly. She didn’t release you when she came back up, her smile a mix of smugness, pride, and quiet adoration. Paige kissed your knuckles, your cheeks, your lips, drawing a contented sigh out of you. “You good?” she asked, brushing your hair out of your eyes, hand cradling your jaw.
Exhausted, all you could do was hum an affirmative. Paige flashed a small smile again, pressing a kiss to your forehead and crawling off the bed, much to your surprise. “Lemme get you some water,” she said. “‘M coming right back, I promise.”
You nodded wordlessly, closing your eyes and sinking back into the pillows as your breathing evens out. She left her room, the door shutting with a silent click. In the silence of Paige’s bedroom, curled up in her purple comforter, all you can think about is how the future of your friendship has inexplicably changed forever. She said she wanted you. Did she just mean sexually? Paige was always intentional in her communication, a byproduct of her media training. Tears brimmed your eyes when you considered the idea that you might have just been another Wednesday night fling for her. Here you are again, feeling stupid about the overwhelming feelings you harbored for Paige despite your better judgment. The worst part was that it wasn’t her fault. You got your hopes up.
You wiped your eyes when you heard the door open again. Paige crossed the room, cracking open a cold bottle of water for you and pressing it to your lips. You nearly forgot about your inner turmoil when she smiled at you again, having thrown her hair back up into its bun. “Gonna clean you up, okay?” she informed you. At your nod, she runs a warm washcloth between your thighs, getting rid of the lingering stickiness. She carefully redressed you, squeezing your hips gently, and you’re left feeling so incredibly conflicted that you’re breathless with the anxiety. Paige disposed of the washcloth and curled up next to you in bed once more, an arm wrapping around your midsection. You’d told each other goodnight, but as her breath evens out against your neck, your mind races.
You slept fitfully through the night. And when morning light rolled around, you extracted yourself from Paige’s grip, sliding a pillow into her arms. The nervousness and all of your overthinking thoughts made you queasy with grief. You were in love with Paige Bueckers. That much was true. You were too head over heels for her to return to normalcy; you couldn’t. At that point, it would be easier for you to not be friends with her at all than to pretend like she wasn’t everything you’d ever wanted.
As she slept, you casted one last guilty look over your shoulder and you ran.
But that night in February has long since passed, and on the porch swing on a much warmer night in April, Paige stares at you in desperation, seeking answers to the questions you’ve withheld for over a month. “Why did you leave?” she asks you again. “Fuck, tell me the truth, lie to me, whatever, just please give me something to work with.”
“It was overwhelming,” you finally admit, twisting the rings on your fingers. You feel terrible as you glance at Paige, whose eyes soften when she takes in your expression.
“I’m sorry,” she says. “I shoulda seen that something was wrong.”
You close your eyes, lips trembling. You’re touched at how she instantly takes responsibility for your fuck ups, thinking she’s done something wrong. “No, Paige,” you correct her. “Fuck. It wasn’t you. It was never you.” You pick at a loose string on your shorts. She stares at you, waiting for you to continue. “You were so gentle. That night meant everything to me, and that was the problem. I wanted you so bad – Jesus Christ, I was in love with you for months. I don’t do casual. I always feel too strongly and I loved you so much that it was fucking overwhelming. I woke up and nearly lost it because I couldn’t handle the idea of having you like that and having to pretend like I didn’t want you like that forever. It was so much easier to run and not face the possibility of having to be your friend when all I’ve wanted was more.”
When you finally look back to Paige, her eyes are wide with something that looks strangely like grief, like you’ve pulled the rug from under her feet and watched as she fell. As you think about it, that’s probably what you’ve done, anyway. She spent so long thinking that your fallout was her fault, that it was something she’d done, but the ugly truth of the matter was that you were too scared of the way you felt for her that you ran from it instead. Paige runs a frustrated hand over her jaw, her expression nearly unreadable. You frown. “I’m sorry,” you say quietly, knowing that your apology is long overdue. You fucked up so incredibly bad with her. Your brain remembers her prior words, the ‘It wasn’t a hook up. It meant something to me – everything to me,’ and you suddenly feel like an idiot. God, it was mutual this entire time and you were too caught up in yourself to realize it.
“You think too fucking much,” Paige says finally, and you hardly have the time to react before she’s kissing you, her hands gripping your hips. You nearly gasp against her lips before you fully register what’s happening. Sinking into it, you wrap your arms around her neck, feeling suddenly like everything is finally aligning, that all of your blurred focal points sharpen. When she pulls away, her eyes are alight with understanding. “So, lemme get this straight. You pushed me away ‘cause you’re in love with me, then we fucked, and you thought I wouldn’t wife you up?”
You frown, feeling stupid all over again. “Well, when you put it like that…yeah?”
Paige sighs. “Fuck. Look at my lawyer – you’d send dudes to jail left and fucking right ‘cause you jump to conclusions too early. Thank God you’re not going into criminal defense.”
You shove her away from you, feeling the embarrassment bloom on your cheeks. You can’t help but laugh as you say, “You’re an asshole.”
She guffaws, reaching for your hands, intertwining your fingers. “Says you! You ghosted me for a month and let me think I fucked us up. Jesus Christ.” She twists the ring on your finger mindlessly as she searches for the right words. “Okay, lemme be really fucking clear. I’m in love with you, too. Like, I’m fuckin’ crazy about you. There is nobody but you. You aren’t too much for me – I love you for you, no ifs, ands, buts, whys, hows, nothing. I know you thought you were protecting us by pushin’ me away, but you gotta let me make that choice, too. I want this with you, alright? Will you gimme that chance?”
Her words leave the two of you in silence. You can still hear the chirp of the crickets, the thrumming from the party indoors. You can feel the way her thumb brushes over your knuckles, the way her eyes bore into yours, patiently waiting for your decision. But distinctly, you can see the plea, the desperation for you to just give into what she knows the both of you are feeling. Your anxiety and constant overthinking never ruined the two of you. It may have set you back, but you and Paige found your way back to each other. Maybe you’re not a meteor, dangerously crashing into her and disintegrating on impact. Maybe the two of you are something simpler – the moon and the tide. She was never going to let you get hurt if only you’d give her the opportunity to show you that.
So, you take that leap – whether it’s off the diving board into the pool or the cliffside into beach waves, you don’t care. You know now that Paige is waiting for you at the surface. “I want this, too,” you affirm, watching the smile bloom on her face like springtime flowers, and you seal the deal by pressing your lips to hers. She responds eagerly, her arms tight around you. You loathe that it took the two of you this long, that it was your fault for not trusting Paige with your heart when she’s given you no real reason to doubt her; despite this, her lips taste like forgiveness and yours like atonement. In spite of everything, you made it here in the end, and it was worth it.
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miraculouslbcnreactions · 4 months ago
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Regarding the post about Marinette being punished for trusting people and the response to it, this is something I always have trouble explaining because it sounds callous? But fictional characters aren't people. It's not that their lives just so happen to get in the way leading to something bad happened the writers decided that should happen, and it's important that you stop and ask WHY this happens. If the camera is "on" per se, people assume it's relevant and will tie into something larger. So like if the camera is on and all we see is Alya revealing her identity and then the result is she's outed in the same way she was in Heroes Day, the audience naturally concludes it's connected and thus realizes the lesson is either "Alya learns she shouldn't share her identity" OR "Marinette learns she shouldn't trust people" or both.
Secret identities are a great example of this phenomenon. We're NOT shown every time a villain's plan is foiled because they didn't know the heroe's identity, we ARE shown every time a heroe's identity causes friction in their lives. As such, large parts of the audience think of secret identites as inconveniences because that's what's shown (not just in Miraculous Ladybug, in tons of other shows)
Like you are supposed to make connections in Television about what's being shown to you that no one would make in real life (or at the very least no one SHOULD make in real life) because there's a limited space to tell the story and the audience is assuming the writers aren't wasting our time.
If these were real people it would be unreasonable to say because people have their own lives Marinette can't trust them, but in a story where Marinette is the main character who is explicitly always supposed that's. An accurate way to read the story!
And I also understand that this is a very boring construction if you're making headcanons or thinking about these characters! But that's a different lens, it doesn't make the broader writing lens invalid. You're speaking different languages at that point.
Anyway I hope that helps someone, that's my two cents
You summed it up perfectly! There's a ton of valid criticism to be had of Miraculous, but you can tell from the narrative framing that almost all of it comes down to writing choices and not things that are supposed to be seen as in-universe issues even though a lot of fans treat them as such. It's really weird to see things like people complaining about everything revolving around Marinette as if it's a personal flaw of hers and not the result of her being the main character in a fictional world. "Main Character Syndrome" literally pulls its name from the fact that this is how main characters work in a lot of media. It's a flaw when a real person does it, but in terms of story telling, it's extremely normal - and often good story telling - to have everything revolve around your main character or a core cast.
The issue with Miraculous is that they chose a lot of poor conflicts if they wanted Marinette to be the one and only main character, but that's not her fault. She didn't decide to have the rules around identities make no sense. The writers did. She didn't decide to make the main villain Adrien's dad while also keeping Adrien from being involved in the story. The writers did. The list goes on and on and, because none of it reflects badly on Marinette in the writers' eyes, the show doesn't act like Marinette is in the wrong. Remember, these are the same writers who think that Derision was a great episode that added depth to Marinette instead of destroying her character and making her look unhinged. Their judgement is clearly a little skewed.
While the writers love to make bad plot choices, they are generally using proper story telling language to make those choices, which is why I can tell you how characters' actions are intended to be read. The Rena Furtive and Nino example is a great one because it allows me to show that the writers do understand how to set things up. In fact, once they've decided that they're going to do a thing, they pretty much always set it up at a basic level. It's rarely spectacular and often frustrating, but it's never shocking.
In Rocketear, Alya promises Marinette that Nino will never learn about Rena Furtive. The episode then ends with her breaking that promise via the following exchange:
Alya: (sighs) I'm still Rena Rouge. (Nino gasps.) But now I'm in hiding and that's why Ladybug asked me not to tell anyone. Nino: But why are you telling me if no one's supposed to know? Is Ladybug cool with this? Alya: I can't hide it from you, because I love you, Nino, and we share everything.
Look at how this confession is presented. Look at what the dialogue focuses on. When Marinette confessed her identity to Alya, it was all about the confession and supporting Marinette. There was no discussion of this being a problem for Chat Noir or anything like that because - in the writers' eyes - that wasn't a problem for some reason. This is why Chat Noir almost instantly absolves Ladybug of blame once he finds out about the identity reveal (see: Hack-San.) The writers didn't want it to be an issue so it wasn't:
Ladybug: I'm really sorry, Cat Noir. I should've told you. I mean, if I found out that you told someone about your secret identity, I'd... probably be upset, too. I'm really sorry I hurt your feelings. Cat Noir: You didn't hurt my feelings. You did everything right
But when Alya confesses her identity to Nino, the conversation is not just about her confession. It's about her confession and how she's not supposed to do this. That's why Nino's response is not loving support. Instead, he asks if this is a good idea and if Ladybug knows.
These things are getting focused on because the writers are telling you that this is a bad thing. It's supposed to feel ominous. When I first watched Rocketear, I assumed that the season was going to end with Gabriel getting the fox off of Alya due to Nino because that was an obvious way to raise the stakes and they'd just heavily implied that Nino knowing would be a bad thing. I was, unfortunately, right. The only on screen consequence of Nino knowing is that he outs Alya to everyone in an incredibly forced series of events (see: Strikeback):
(Ryuko successfully prevents the Roue de Paris from hitting them, yet, it flies to the direction where Rena Furtive is. This causes Carapace to panic.) Carapace: Rena! (takes out his shield) Shell-ter! (Carapace's superpower successfully prevents the Ferris wheel from hitting Rena Furtive on top of the Tour Montparnasse. But the information of Rena Furtive's active status shocks the heroes, as well as Shadow Moth.) The heroes: Rena?! Shadow Moth: (from the top of the Eiffel Tower) She's still active?
Of course the Ferris Wheel goes straight for Alya's hiding spot and of course Nino screams her name before casting his power and of course the villain overhears it. It's all so forced and unnatural, which should make it glaringly obvious how much the writers wanted this to happen. This wasn't something they were kind of forced to do because it made sense for the narrative and they wanted to tell a good story. Instead, they wrote an awkward series of events because they really, really, really wanted Nino knowing to be a bad thing that outs Alya so that Marinette loses all of the miraculous even though none of this makes much sense.
How the hell did Gabriel hear Nino's shout from so far away? Is he able to overhear everything the heroes are saying? How does Nino even know that Alya is hiding there? And since when was a Ferris Wheel a threat to these guys? Your girlfriend is a magical girl and she's in her magical girl form, dude. You could drop a building on her and she'd be fine, a thing you have to know because this scene literally goes on to have Chat Noir go flying into a building, hitting it so hard the cement literally cracks, and no one really cares. I guess it's fine if Adrien is a punching bag, but Alya must be protected at all costs...
Anyway, while the above series of events was annoying, none of it was surprising. In fact, it would have all be perfectly predictable even if Alya outing herself was that treated as a more neutral event. Her choice leading to bad things falls perfectly in line with a truly bizarre running theme in the show: outing your identity to the person you love romantically is a bad thing that leads to bad consequences. That's why Chat Blanc and Ephemeral ended the world and why Nino knowing cost Ladybug the fox and why the character they call Joan of Arc has to give up her miraculous to be with her love and why the Kwami's have this absolutely asinine dialogue in Kwamis' Choice:
Plagg: Sugarcube! Having to force them to choose between love and their mission is just awful! Maybe Master Fu was wrong to choose them. Tikki: No, they’re made for each other. Love is what gives them their strength. Plagg: But the impossible part of that love is destroying them, and I know a thing or two about destruction. Tikki: (sighs heavily) What can we do? Plagg: We must free them of that impossible choice. We must… free them of us.
This is the voice of the author telling you that outing the identities is not and never will be a good choice for the love square. Never mind that Alya is allowed to know Marinette's identity or that Gabriel finding out is what actually ended the world in the alternate timelines or that Felix outted himself in public but is still wielding or that freaking Gabriel was allowed to know half of the temp heroes' identities while they were still actively wielding. For some reason, those things don't matter to the narrative, probably because romantic love wasn't involved. The "identity reveals are a bad thing" rule only seems to apply when romantic love is a key element to the point where it's a reoccurring theme in this supposed power of love show.
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niningtori · 4 months ago
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mastermind | oneshot
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: choi beomgyu x you
summary: you should be used to your relationships failing by now, but after finding out your boyfriend, yeonjun, cheated on you, you're devastated yet again. and beomgyu, your best friend, is there to pick up the pieces, just like always. but isn't it a little odd that things just never seem to work out?
genre: romance, angst, smut (MDNI), yandere
warnings: YANDERE!GYU, manipulation, gaslighting, SMUT (MDNI!) creampie, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, dirty talk, degradation, if i missed anything pls lmk!
word count: 5.1k
notes: ... hi. i'm reposting this with major edits but i hope you all still like it!
。o.゚。*・♡♡・*。゚o。 。o.゚。*・♡♡・*。゚o。
do you love your boyfriend? of course. do you trust him? of course. so are you surprised to see a photo of him very clearly making out with another woman? well, of course.
your friends, your family, and even passersby would simply tell you you shouldn’t be, though. yeonjun used to be very well known for his sexual escapades, so when you announced he was your boyfriend, nobody was particularly happy for you. especially not your best friend in the whole world, beomgyu. 
“he’s just gonna hurt you, just like the last one!” 
you remember flinching at this. you remember how hurt and indignant you felt at the time. you also remember the silent treatment you gave him, and the cold war that began shortly thereafter. he apologized afterwards, of course, but you had asked him what was so bad about you that he couldn’t just believe that yeonjun had changed for you. he was silent at this, which only made you even angrier. it was all pointless in the end, you suppose.
as you sit on beomgyu’s couch, your phone rings again. you have a special ringtone for yeonjun, so you don’t even bother to check the caller id before you silence it. he’s been calling you incessantly since you texted him that you saw the picture and were done with him. your face is downcast and if you weren't so consumed by your sadness, you'd notice the faint look of delight in beomgyu’s eyes. 
“i think you should just block him,” he says as nonchalantly as he can muster. maybe in another state of mind, you'd register the satisfaction in his tone, but right now? all you can sense is his urgency, which can easily be explained away by selfless and sincere concern. just how he likes it.
“you’re right,” you sigh. “i guess i just don’t understand. things were going so well, and then he goes and does this to me. i don’t know what i did wrong,” you say while burying your face in your hands. he almost can’t control the way his lips want to curl up at this, but he’s become nothing if not a master of containing his true emotions. he’s kept them from your prying eyes for years, after all.
“aww, baby. it’s not you, it’s him. he’s just not the right guy for you,” he coos, but for some reason, you can’t help but be annoyed at his kindness. 
“i know you want to say i told you so, so say it,” you snap, pulling your face from your hands and scowling at him.
“i don’t want —” 
“if you wanted me to learn my lesson, i’ve learned it, alright? i don't need to be taught again,” you say with a huff. you know you’re being unreasonable. you know you’re being a bitch, but you just can’t help it. who told beomgyu to be right about your potential partners all the damn time? fuck his crazy-accurate intuition.
he looks genuinely hurt by your harsh words, though, so you can’t help but feel a wave of regret wash over you. you’re drowning in it, even, as you watch his puppy eyes gloss over.
“beomie, baby, i’m so sorry,” you say, gently grabbing his face with one hand and pushing his long hair behind his ear with the other. “i know i’m being awful to you when you’re just trying to help.”
“it’s okay,” he says solemnly, looking like a kicked puppy. “as long as you’re sorry.” somehow, his easy acceptance of your apology makes you feel even worse. you pull him in for a hug and he buries his face in your neck to a) soak up your scent and b) hide his growing smirk. but you’re too caught up in your feelings to notice.
“it’s really okay,” he assures once you part.
“no, it isn’t. i’m being a shitty friend. how about you stay over tonight? we can watch a movie and i’ll order something for us to eat,” you suggest. he graciously accepts your peace offering and the night is spent with giggles and an overt amount of cuddling.
as you’re drifting off to sleep, you feel beomgyu plant a kiss on your forehead. to anyone else, this might come across as oddly intimate, but you know better. people have said that you two would make a good couple, but you two do nothing but laugh it off every time. they just don’t understand your dynamic. he’s a man like any other, you guess, but seeing him as anything other than a friend is simply laughable. you know he feels the same exact way about you, too, which is why you are unfazed by his next words. 
“i love you. it’s just — i just love you so much, you know?” he whispers.
“aww, beomie. you know i love you, too. you’re my best friend in the whole world,” you murmur as sleep finally overcomes you.
if the lights were on, you’d see how his face falls and contorts into something like a grimace.
-
yeonjun has been spamming you like crazy, so you listen to beomgyu and block his number as well as his social media accounts. you think this whole chapter of your life is over, but, as always, you are wrong.
a week or so after your messy breakup, a sudden knock at your door pulls your attention away from mindless scrolling on your phone. you don't think much of it — it’s probably just beomgyu with some takeout, or something. however, when you look through the peephole, you realize that yeonjun is not finished bothering you just yet. 
“baby, please. i know you’re there. please, just open up. i’ll explain everything!” he pleads. you’re not particularly known for your callousness of heart, so it doesn’t take much more begging for you to feel guilty and let him in. you open your door with a sigh. 
“thank you!” yeonjun says with a look of pure relief as he hurriedly enters your apartment. he takes a seat on your couch (unprompted, you might add) and takes a shaky breath. you cautiously seat yourself on the other end of the couch and prepare to listen to whatever bullshit he has conjured up for your viewing pleasure before you decide that it’s best just to cut to the chase. ripping the band-aid off, and all that.
“look, i don’t care that you’re sorry. there’s nothing you can say to make me change my —” 
“it was beomgyu!” he exclaims before you can get another word out.
“... what?” you ask confusedly. where the hell is he going with this?
“the girl, the picture, fucking everything was all his fucking fault. he did it,” he rants. oh. he must think you’re fucking stupid.
“yeonjun, please don’t waste my time,” you sigh. “i think you should leave,” you add, getting up from your seat.
“wait!” he pleads, reaching for your hand and gently pulling you back down. “remember how i always told you that i had a weird feeling about him? like how something always felt… off?” oh well. if he wants to continue putting on a show, then so be it. besides, it’ll be a funny story to tell beomgyu later on.
you nod.
“well, he always looked at me weirdly. like, whenever i’d walk into the room, there was always this… this tension and i never knew why, but i understood it as soon as we made things official. it’s because he likes you.” you’re silent for a moment and yeonjun actually thinks he’s getting through to you before you burst into near-maniacal laughter. his face falls.
“beomgyu? beomgyu likes me?” you say between giggles. beomgyu loves you like a sister. no way in hell does he harbor a shred of romantic love for you. 
“you’re not listening,” he grunts, slightly tugging at his own hair in frustration. “he’s always been weird, and the other night at the bar, he introduced me to that girl you saw me ‘kissing’. they kept giving me drinks until i could barely fucking see straight. then she kept coming onto me, but i said no. i finally told her to kick rocks, but the next thing i knew was that she was kissing me. i know it sounds crazy, but you have to believe me.” you want to dismiss everything he’s saying, but his utter sincerity seems to strike a chord within you. you can’t say you believe him, but he continues before you can properly digest his words.
“think about it. why the hell would i cheat in such a public place where all of our friends hang out? don't you think i would be smarter than that? and even if i wasn't, you know me. you know i would never cheat on you.” he seems desperate now, but it’s still hard to believe that beomgyu orchestrated this entire thing instead of the very real possibility that yeonjun just got drunk and acted recklessly.
“alright, this isn’t funny anymore. you need to stop,” you warn, not liking how much he’s making sense.
“think,” he repeats with conviction.
so you do. you think back to all of the tumultuous relationships you’ve had until now. they've all ended in different ways, yes, but they all had one common denominator: beomgyu. oh, beomgyu saw your boyfriend getting cozy with his ex. you’re having an argument with your boyfriend? beomgyu thinks he’s a piece of shit because of how he treats you, you obviously deserve better! wait, your boyfriend keeps taking too long to text you back? he’s just losing interest! it’s clearly better to break it off now rather than getting too invested when you’re inevitably going to break up, anyway. and all the other greatest hits. your face twists from focused to horrified as the realization sinks into your bones. it's beomgyu. it’s always been beomgyu. 
you look to yeonjun with pure shock in your eyes and he meets your gaze with a look of sympathy. you finally get it. 
“junie, i’m so sorry,” you say, tears springing into your eyes. “i’m so sorry i doubted you.” 
“it’s okay,” he replies with a melancholy smile. “he manipulated you.” 
“does… does that mean we’re back together now?” you ask, voice tinged with hope. his smile falters at your question, and you feel a sense of dread.
“i need some time,” he says after a pause, dropping his hand from yours. “you really hurt me. i understand that beomgyu manipulated you, but it really hurts that you didn't trust me, you know?” 
“i understand,” you quietly reply. you’d be hurt if the tables were turned — it’s only natural. you just hope to god above that you haven’t let beomgyu ruin another good thing for you.
-
beomgyu is confused as to why you’ve been ignoring him for the better part of a week. you don’t respond when he texts or calls, and his intuition is telling him that it has something to do with yeonjun. maybe you’re just shutting down because of the breakup? it was particularly brutal this time around, after all. he’s lucky that yeonjun has such a lascivious sexual history, or else you might not have bought his little charade, even with the proof presented directly in front of you. that’s how much you love(d) yeonjun. the thought causes jealousy to rear its ugly head in his stomach, but whatever. there’s no way you’re going back to him after the way the scandal has made its way through your social life. even if you do want to get back together with him, there's no way your pride will let you. your pride has been a particularly nasty sort of obstacle in beomgyu’s pursuit of you, but it’s absolutely delicious to be able to use it against you like this. serves you fucking right.
still, it’s his job as your dutiful best friend to cheer you up. with this in mind, he picks up your favorite takeout and heads to your place. he smiles when he imagines the way you’ll gratefully embrace him once you realize that he’s here for you. maybe this time you’ll understand that he’s always been the one who’s there for you when someone hurts you. maybe this time will be his big break, finally freeing him from the purgatory he has been in for god knows how long.
he knocks on your door with a hopeful smile on his face. surprisingly, you’re swinging the door open mere seconds later with your eyes similarly lit up with hope.
“yeon— oh. it’s you,” you say, deflating immediately. there’s a certain sense of resentment in your tone that he catches onto, but he chalks it up to disappointment. his face falls. goddamn it. damn it all to hell.
“i brought you some food to cheer you up,” he says while shaking the plastic takeout bag, completely ignoring the slip of another man’s name. 
he invites himself in, slipping off his shoes and sitting down on the couch as he usually does. 
he waits for you to join him, but when he looks up at you, all he sees is you staring at him, arms crossed and face contorted in anger. surely you can’t be that upset that he’s not yeonjun, right? now that he thinks about it, why would you be expecting yeonjun, anyway? hadn’t you effectively cut him off? did you talk to him and take him back after all that (you think) he’s done? that can’t be right. unless… unless you actually let him talk to you. oh god, please tell him that’s not what happened.
“what’s wrong?” he asks, face devoid of anything deeper than curiosity and worry. 
you’re silent for a moment before you carefully choose your next words.
“i talked to yeonjun,” you reply, and his heart sinks to his stomach. “he told me some… interesting things.”
beomgyu hopes you don’t notice how hard he gulps. you do not.
“what did he say?” he asks, face tense but still showing no clear signs of guilt. 
“he told me what happened that night. he told me how you got him drunk and basically forced that girl onto him. he also said that you’re the reason none of my relationships work out,” you declare, opting to stop beating around the bush and just get some answers. you study his face for a crack of some sort, but there is none.
“and what do you think?” he asks quietly.
“i think… i think he might be telling the truth,” is what you say, but you’re sounding increasingly unsure with every word because beomgyu looks more hurt than you’ve ever seen him.
“you believe him over me?” he asks, voice cracking and lips trembling with his brown eyes glossed over in what you can only describe as devastation. god, either beomgyu’s a really good actor, yeonjun’s a really good actor, or you’re just fucking stupid.
“i… i don’t know what to think, beomgyu,” you whisper after a pause. all he does is nod before his next words pierce your heart.
“is that why you’ve been ignoring me?”
jesus christ. you were so sure that yeonjun was telling the truth when he told you about beomgyu, so ignoring him only seemed natural under the circumstances, but he looks every bit like the victim in light of your accusations. his trembling lips and wounded gaze make you want to strangle yourself for ever doubting him. as you feel yourself being consumed with remorse, though, you remember the sincerity and desperation in yeonjun’s words. maybe this was all a huge misunderstanding? maybe they’re both convinced that they’re right? 
“y-yes. i’m sorry. i was just confused. maybe he just misunderstood?” you babble. he likes your hesitancy, but it’s still wearing on his patience. as much as he wants to say he can’t believe that you’d question him because of some guy you dated, he can believe it when it comes to you. you always, always, always hurt him like this, and he’s had just about enough.
“and what if it’s true?” he asks, pathetic facade wiped clean off of his face while something more somber replaces it entirely. your eyes lock with his and you’re stunned silly. 
“what?” is all you can manage to reply with. 
“what if i pushed that girl onto yeonjun? what if i ruined all of your relationships? what would you do?” 
“so it’s true?!” is all you can say, guilt flaring into sheer rage and hurt. 
“so what if it is?” he asks, as if he doesn’t comprehend how twisted this is.
“so… so how could you do that to me?!” 
“i was only doing what’s best for you,” he impatiently replies. “they were only gonna hurt you, can’t you see that? even before i did anything, there were still all those men who cheated on you, lied to you, used you. what’s wrong with wanting to protect you from people like them? i just couldn’t stand to see you living like that!” he argues, clearly believing he’s completely justified in all of this.
sure, you’ve been hurt before even without his intervention, but that doesn’t mean he can just play puppeteer in your love life to “protect” you from anything similar happening ever again. you trusted him and he manipulated you. he acted like a knight in shining armor this entire time while knowingly sabotaging any potentially good thing that could come your way. and he did it all because he wants to protect you? bullshit. 
“you know, i thought that even if everyone other man in the world could hurt me, you never would,” you say shakily, either from sadness or anger. maybe both. “i guess i was wrong.”
“hurt you?! hurt is watching the person you love fuck other people over and over and over again! hurt is watching you laugh me off and never even fucking considering me as an option, goddamn it!” he yells while slamming his hand on your coffee table. 
“so your solution was to fuck up every relationship i have just to have me to yourself?! do you not realize how fucked up that is?!” you yell back, trying to appear unfazed by his increasingly enraged behavior. he seems to falter at this, genuinely at a loss for words at your unforgiving pinpointing of his erratic actions. the desperate, eager-to-please beomgyu you know all too well is finally back and you feel your confidence surge because of it.
“i only did that because —”
“why? because you love me? or think you do?” you mock with a hollow laugh. “you don’t purposely ruin the life of someone you love.” he looks genuinely wounded by your words. 
“but i —”
“i don’t care. get out,” you say mercilessly. you’re absolutely through with listening to his fucked up ideations about love and what his twisted moral compass deems as justified because of it. you’re so preoccupied with preaching on your soapbox, you don’t even realize his attitude has once again shifted from the compliant beomgyu to the one you don’t recognize at all. 
“... no,” he says flatly. 
“did you not fucking hear me? i said get out,” you repeat through clenched teeth. normally, your raised hackles would be enough to scare him off, so you figure he’ll tuck his tail and leave right about now. oh, how wrong you are.
“are you deaf?” he asks with a sneer. “i said no.”
“what do you mean, no?” you ask. somewhere in the depths of your mind, alarm bells begin ringing, but it’s far too late to heed them. plus, you’re still under the impression that he’ll bend to your will. 
“oh, so you’re not deaf. just stupid,” he snorts. your jaw is agape at his audacity. beomgyu has caught an attitude and gotten fresh with you before, sure, but nothing like this. to say you’re dumbstruck would be to put things in the mildest of terms. you can barely get out your next sentence.
“w-what do you mean?” 
“i’m not leaving this apartment,” he says firmly, and before you can even ask him to explain, he’s dragging you away with a painful grip.
“ow! beomgyu, you’re hurting m—” 
“shut up. i told you what real hurt is, but you're not fucking listening. i don't want to hear another word come out of your mouth,” he says in a monotone voice. if the alarm bells were ringing in the depths of your mind before, they’re absolutely blaring at the forefront of your brain right now. 
“what are y-you —”
“i thought i told you to shut up,” he snaps before roughly grabbing your face and planting his lips on yours. the kiss is crude. it’s absolutely vulgar with the way it’s all tongue and teeth and saliva, but after a few seconds of uncertainty, you find yourself melting into it. this is wrong. you two are the best of friends, almost like brother and sister. and more than that, you love yeonjun, right? you’re supposed to be working on getting back together with him, aren’t you? but your reason starts to be sucked away as you feel his hands caress your body, leaving nothing but fire in their wake.
you don’t know how you got here, almost completely naked as you lay on your back while beomgyu continues attacking your lips. it’s blazing hot and you can’t help but feel your underwear becoming wet with every moan that escapes his mouth and consequently reverberates onto your tongue. as if he already knows the intricacies of your internal battle, one of his hands finds its way to your now soaking wet pussy and he uses his index and middle fingers to spread the slickness around. he swirls his fingers around your hole and just barely pushes one of them into the entrance. you gasp at the shallow intrusion and you can feel his notorious shit-eating grin pressed across your lips as he feels how tight you are. you’re ridiculously turned on and he knows it. he pauses his actions only to unzip his pants and yank them down to his knees. your eyes widen at what you can only describe as his huge appendage, all reddened and already leaking. you feel your cunt throbbing with even more need at the sight, but your last shred of reason still makes you hesitate.
“beomgyu, we can't… we're friends, and yeonjun is —”
“can’t you just let me make you feel good? god, you’re making this so difficult, but what the fuck else is new,” he growls. 
he's right. you are making things difficult. there's no way of salvaging your friendship after this, so what's the point in holding back now? you realize that while he may be absolutely unhinged, his feelings for you are real. do you reciprocate them? you don’t know yet, but the thought of him doting on another person the same way he dotes on you makes you feel uneasy. as for yeonjun? well, he deserves better than the cesspool of turbulent emotions that you currently find yourself in. 
“you still sure you don’t want me?” he asks cockily. you, with all of your pride, can only muster up a feeble shake of your head. he knew the answer before you gave it to him, but his condescending gaze shows you that your words have scratched a certain itch of his.
he rubs his hardened length against your folds and it’s all you can do to resist locking your ankles around his waist and pulling him into you, but something stops you. protection. you don’t even have to say it, because he knows you too well for your own good.
“let me fuck you raw,” he says breathily, just barely poking his length into your tight hole. “i know you need it, baby. just let me take care of you.” you’re silent for a moment before pinching out your next words.
“p-pull out?” he won’t because he knows you’ll be begging him for his cum when he’s done with you, and you already know he won’t, even when he nods and promises he will. you don't know why you even asked. 
the ache you feel to have him buried inside you is quickly replaced by the ache you feel once he begins to stretch you out. it’s a stinging, burning sort of pain, but that’s nothing in comparison to the pure pleasure you feel as his flared tip drags along your walls. he begins with thrusting shallowly, fucking you open like you’re a virgin, and you’re so tight while he’s so big, you might as well be. 
painfully slowly, he pushes each and every inch of himself into your gummy hole. he reaches places you didn’t even know existed and stretches you open so good all you have the brainpower to call the sensation is fullness. overwhelming fullness. when he finally sheathes himself in you completely, a strangled cry leaves both of your throats as you feel him throbbing inside of you and he, in turn, feels you pulsating around him. 
after you adjust, you expect him to start drilling into you with reckless abandon, but he does nothing of the sort. just watches you with a strange look on his face. 
“b-beomie? what are you doing?” you ask pathetically, head raising up from its place on the pillows to meet his wanton gaze.
“beg me for it.”
“beg for w—” your question is interrupted by a sharp smack on your sensitive pussy. 
“beg me for it. beg me to fuck you like a whore. i won’t tell you again,” he says menacingly. your bleary eyes are so confused, so stupid, and so, so cute, but he’s determined to use the last of his self-control to get you to feel even a fraction of the desperation he’s felt for years. well, even if you don’t, he’ll spend the whole night fucking you dumb until you do. but you’re so hungry for his dick, you don’t even realize that he’s bluffing.
finally, you understand what he’s asking of you, and you waste no time to comply. 
“n-need your cock, beomie. need you to make me f-feel good,” you say, trying to retain even a semblance of your dignity. this brings a mean smirk to his face, but he’s not done with you, yet.
“surely you can do better than that?” he taunts, rocking his hips ever so slightly so you can feel every inch of his length and girth teasingly hitting your cervix, but providing no relief. fuck your dignity. you need him.
“please! please, i need you! need your cock to fill me up!” you whine.
“mhmm, and?”
“need you to fuck me! need you to fill me up with your cum!” well, there goes your resolve to have him pull out. this seems to satisfy his sadistic desires.
“oh, my love. all you had to do was ask,” he says with a grin. and that’s when he starts. 
his hips meet yours in the most punishing way, and that’s what this is: a punishment for the way you’ve treated him all these years. you can feel it in the way that his fingernails dig into your skin and in the way that he mercilessly presses down on your tummy until all you can feel is pressure building up to something unknown.
“who else can fuck you like this? who else can split you open like this?” he asks as lewd squelches reverberate throughout the room. 
“n-nobody! only you, beomie!” you cry.
“that’s my good girl, such a good girl. baby just needs me to use her like a fucktoy, right?” and all you can do is whine and clench in carnal need as the poor springs of your bed squeak with every unforgiving thrust.
“oh, you like that, don’t you?” he snickers. “you like being my little whore. you’re just a toy for me, alright? free to use whenever i feel like it.” you nod in agreement and he lets out a chuckle as he pounds into you at an unimaginable speed, balls slapping your ass with every fiery thrust. each time he pumps into you, your pussy’s clamping down on him and sucking him in like that’s where he’s meant to be. and maybe it is. 
“god, i’m close,” he groans after pumping into you for what feels like hours, and you whimper like a bitch in heat. “honey, don’t worry,” he tuts. “i’ll fuck you every day, i’ll fill you with my cum so you can’t leave. not that you’ll want to after this. you’re made for me, made to be my cumdump whenever i want.” 
“y-yes!” you shriek, somehow liking the idea of being full of his cum forever and ever. 
“that’s my girl. baby just wants me to fuck her good. that’s all you needed, right? that’s why you’ve been such a brat. you just needed me to show you what it’s like to be fucked right,” he says, rolling your clit for good measure, which is enough to make you reach your high as it comes crashing down around you. beomgyu wasn’t lying when he said he was close, so when he feels you clenching around his big cock as if you’re milking him for all that he’s worth, you feel it twitching before hot bursts of cum paint your inner walls until you’re leaking white and seeing stars. he continues with slow, lazy pumps until he softens. you stay like that for an indeterminable amount of time, breathing raggedly while your bodies are overcome with thrums of delight. 
when he finally pulls out and lays down beside you, bodies slick with sheens of sweat, he pushes your hair back behind your ear and plants a kiss on your temple. shakily, he takes his hand and rubs it along your distended tummy, full of his cum. he lovingly strokes it with an awed smile on his face.
“such a good girl for me,” he repeats. “i can’t wait until you’re pregnant. you’ll have as many babies as i can give you, right?” and all you can do is nod deliriously. he smiles in satisfaction as you eagerly agree to his every nasty, perverted thought. “god, i love you so much. and you love me too, right? say it. say you love me.”
“i love you.” and you realize that you do.  this man is deranged, but he’s yours, and for better or for worse, you're his. especially now that you might very well be carrying his children. and even if you aren’t, you know he’ll make good on his promises to keep fucking you until you are. should you be glad that he effectively ruined every potential relationship for you? you were unsure before, but you realize that nobody has or ever will love you as much as he does, even if he has a demented way of showing it. well, it is what it is. there’s no way out after this.
notes pt. 2: i hope this goes over better after the editing!
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thebirthofvenusfly · 7 months ago
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hi i was raised in a home daycare for over 20 years and studied child development and psychology in school for 3 and would like to gush about why i love how bonnie was written and how they're one of the few kids in games i've played that Actually Feel Like a Kid:
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firstly: bonnie's diction
bonnie cursing like a sailor is honestly pretty accurate for a kid aged like 9-14 and i distinctly remember having a huge cursing phase of my own at that age too so LMAO
they ask a lot of questions adjacent to a kids' understanding/confusion of things, social norms, situations, feelings, etc. (the conversation about the actors kissing in that play they saw and how they MUST have had an invisible paper between their lips because nobody would REALLY kiss on stage in front of everybody!)
they can be incredibly blunt but often not with the intention to hurt feelings rather than genuinely acquire information (sometimes with some sass b/c of previous conditioning.) ex. "Our teacher always tells us we have to speak up more... You're an adult so why don't you speak up more?" (Precedent/Conditioning; "Adult in position of power and authority has ingrained it is important to use my voice." -> "Why don't you, an adult who should know better, use yours more then?")
they have a tendency to confidently and casually use words and phrases they don't fully understand or know ("Air-no-no-nomic" -> this especially being something picked up by a fellow kid and just trusted that) (struggling to say, "pomegranate" (very cute watching odile help them with it :,) ) (struggling to say onigiri -> purposely messing this up to get a playful reaction out of dile, a party member they're especially close to, was also very sweet)
it's hard to discuss feelings. they're more likely to use a vessel as a means of connecting to someone else before being able to assign words to everything (offering a peach to siffrin in the classroom because they recognize he's upset without fully understanding why, then waiting for him to address the situation)
secondly: how bonnie handles feelings towards the others and about their Scenario
tendency to hold onto hard, serious, difficult-to-breach subjects and then explode and scream when addressed (ex. Rotten Adults quest)
slightly more partial to physical touch than verbal affirmation (hugs, hugs, hugs! including the little half-hugs they do where they just run into siffrin's side...)
jabbing siffrin in the stomach as a show of example for touching them LMAO???
recounting stories and information that interests them without regard for how socially appropriate it is or why others may react poorly (ex. talking to the party about how nille ran away with them and why she did)
unspoken guilt and trauma causing disconnection from people they love (siffrin's eye situation)
just a few examples and thoughts i liked
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slimepuparibaba · 5 months ago
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LnDS HCs: Sylus (General HCs)
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HI! I HAVE TOO MANY HEADCANONS FOR SYLUS SO PLEASE TAKE THEM!! THEY WILL DEFO NOT BE ACCURATE COME JULY BUT STILL IM USING WHAT SCRAPS OF INFO I HAVE RN AND IF HE TURNS OUT LIKE THIS APOLLO GAVE ME THE GIFT OF PROPHECY
IF THIS IS INACCURATE I WILL COMMIT CHAPTER 4 OKOK
GENERAL HC DUMP / PREDICTIONS (MAYBE DONT COUNT ON IT)
Okay, we all agree he comes off as the type of guy that would burn the world for you.
BUT!
Big but here.
I don't think he's a terrible boyfriend or anything. In fact, he genuinely does love you.
I believe, me personally, you are the one weakness this man has and he will treat you with care. Is the way he treats you rough around the edges and comes off a little different than most? Yes.
But he won't ever actually hurt you. He watches you from afar like a silent protector to make sure you aren't hurt, even using his Evol to make sure you STAY alive.
I personally think he might actually treat you kinda like one of his men, like an equal in terms of "you can definitely handle yourself and I know you're strong", but he'll still keep an eye on you just because you're that important to him. He trusts you.
...okay, so like, maybe not completely trust you because let's be honest here, you're kiiiinda prone to trying dumb shit on him, but it's funny. He'll forgive it. The smug bastard.
From what I've seen, he comes off cool, suave, knows what he's doing. Cocky.
Bad boy. He's a bad boy in all sense of the word.
He knows what he's doing, he's confident, he's charming. Knows what to say and do. He's also a CEO so dealing with people? Basically easy for him.
When it comes to you? He will flirt. Because he likes getting a reaction out of you.
I bet he teases you a TON. You hate him? Good. At least you have him in your thoughts.
Love is war with him. You try to scheme? He already has a counter. Man is 100 steps ahead of you, but just likes seeing you make a complete fool of yourself.
You know when he gets the upper hand he'll have that signature smirk of his that just screams "kiss me to shut me up and I'll consider this your win".
You thought Rafayel had an ego? Nah. NAH, THIS DUDE HAS AN E G O.
Sparring sessions with him are very likely. He'd probably be like "alright, but not going easy on you" or something cocky like that with a smug smirk on his face.
Man genuinely treats you as his equal though when training. Teaches you everything he knows and points out some techniques you might be rusty on.
Rizz is off the charts. He's lived in the N109 Zone and breathed it for so long. He's a sweet talker, so be prepared for him to know how to make you melt.
But also, he will actually spoil you. Will he make you work for it? Yes. He will give you an entire runaround (make you say please, make you verbalize it, etc), but he does it because he loves you.
You are genuinely his soft spot, and I CANNOT stress this enough.
The things he does in the dark are things he does FOR YOU. His reason for being REVOLVES around you, you just don't know it yet. Don't let him being the leader of Onichynus get to your head—he has method to his madness.
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tarot-by-tabitha · 1 month ago
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Who’s Secretly Crushing on You?
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Hey everyone 💖! In today’s pick-a-pile reading, you're going to get to know Who’s secretly crushing on you? Whether it's someone you've noticed or someone who's been admiring you from afar, this reading will uncover all the hidden feelings, their intentions, and what might happen between you two 💫
For this reading, I’m using tarot cards, Lenormand, Wild Unknown Archetypes Oracle, Romance Angels, and Angel Answers.
How can you choose your pile accurately?
1. Pick a pile: take a deep breath, relax and choose a picture that calls out to you the most.
2. Once you’ve picked your pile, scroll down to your reading🫶
I also really appreciated feedback!
Please note: this pick a card reading is a collective reading. While the insights may resonate, please take the reading with a grain of salt and always trust your own judgement when making decisions 💫
✨If you like my readings you can tip me here or paypal.me/TabithaSky13
Want a more personalised and in depth reading? 🔮 You can find it here
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PILE 1
Cards: The Temple, The River, 9 of cups rx, Romantic Feelings, 2 of Swords, Skythe, In the near future, The empress rx
Who’s this person? I’m seeing that for pile 1, your secret admirer is someone who’s reflective, they also could be a spiritual person. They come off as calm, introspective and thoughtful. They have been through some emotional ups and downs but know they’re more grounded and wise. They value deeper connections and that’s part of what attracts them to you. They’re the type to listen more than speak. When in social settings, they like to observe more than participating. I’m seeing that they also enjoy spending time alone, they might also like to go to cafe and just sit there alone probably reading or just simply working. They prefer meaningful conversations rather than small talks. They could have a Pisces, cancer or libra in big 3. Could also have Virgo and Taurus in their big 6.
How do they feel about you? This person really likes you but they feel insecure whether you feel the same way about you or not. They’re not so confident yet to act on their feelings. They just like to admire you from far but doesn’t feel like confessing their feelings just yet. What I’m feeling here, they’re worried about getting rejected or their feelings won’t be reciprocated. This might be someone that barely talks to you, even if they talk to you it’s only about something important, say that you’re classmates/work colleagues, they would only talk to you when you guys are in the same group projects or if there’s tasks that involves both of you.
What’s their intention? I’m feeling a real and genuine feelings here, it’s not just simply a crush that change every now and then. They want to explore where this could go. This person thinks about you more often that you realise and they’re curious if there’s future for both of you. They want to take the next step but they’re unsure how to approach it without seem like they’re a creep or without ruining your connection with them. I’m seeing also in the future they might text you random things to start a conversation or inviting you to hang out with his friends group. They want to test to see if they’re mutual interest without being too forward.
Why haven’t they confessed yet? They feel conflicted. They feel lots of indecision. On one hand, they want to tell you how they feel but on the other hand, they’re afraid to risk changing the dynamic between you two and unsure about your feelings. They may wanted to send you a text before but cancelled it, they didn’t have quite the courage yet to make a move. Sometimes they feel like making plans with you but back out at last minute😅
What’s attracting them to you? They love your straightforwardness. You are not the type to beat around the bush and they find it refreshing. You seem like someone who knows what they want and isn’t afraid to chase after it. They like your sharpness, the way you talk, your sense of humor. You’re maybe they type to speak your mind and they noticed this. They might have seen you expressing your opinions confidently. They love that you don’t like to pretend to be someone you’re not.
Will they confess their feelings? I got a “In the near future”. There’s good possibility that they’ll tell you how they feel soon. They have hold it back for quite a while and they feel that the timing start to feel right. Something will push them to stop overthinking and just go for it. I’m seeing a scene where you guys are hanging out with them and they finally get the courage to say something like “I’ve been wanting to tell you something…” or they could also be sliding into your DMs and confessing their feelings after a late night conversation.
What will happen between two of you? At first , it might not happen as smoothly as you’d expect. Maybe the timing is off or one of you could have personal stuff to deal with before fully entering this relationship. It might not develop right away but with time, it could develop into something more. You guys will start things little awkwardly it eventually you guys will become more comfortable with each other with time.
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PILE 2
Cards: The Mystic, The Ocean, The Stars, Passion, Ace of Pentacles, Cloud, Opportunity, 5 of Swords
Who’s crushing on you? I’m seeing that this is a person with deep and mysterious aura. They have rich inner world, like to spend time contemplating, kinda similar to pile 1 person. Your secret admirer have creative and artistic side. Some of them likes to paint or graphic designing. Some of them likes to sing and write songs. They’re someone who enjoys nature especially ocean, they love to meditate too. They love writing as well. Might also play some musical instruments too. They’re kind of reserved but they’re very emotionally intense actually. They might not talk much in group settings but when they do it’s something meaningful. Some of them are also into astrology and occults.
They could have Pisces , scorpio or Aquarius in their big 3. Some earth signs in their chart too.
How do they feel about you? They feel overwhelming admiration towards you. They feel hope when they think about you. You light up their world and make them feel inspired. Whenever they’re around you they feel more optimistic, you light a positivity in their life. You make them feel uplifted and they feel sense of longing to be closer to you. They might admire your confidence and beauty too, your ability to always remain positive as well. They’re fantasising how it would be like to be closer to you as they feel that you’re a bit out of their league.
What are their intentions? They’re interested to explore romantic relationship with you. They have strong feelings and want to let their emotions flow. It’s not just a fleeting crush, there is passion there. They want to see where things can go between you two . I’m seeing that in the future they’ll want to ask you out or spend more time with you , they’ll likely show their excitement more. They’re not into shallow connections and want to build something deeper.
Why haven’t they confessed? I’m seeing that they’re still waiting for the right time. They’re the kind of person who wants to be sure they can offer something stable and long lasting first. They could be working on themselves first for now, could be financially, emotionally. They might be still focused in getting their life in order first , making sure they have good job and feeling more secure before confessing, they don’t want to rush in and offer something half hearted. I’m seeing for some of you, this person could just be getting in a new job, so they want to be secured first as they want to be able to provide for you.
What attracts them to you? They’re attracted to your complexity. You’re not someone easy to figure out and that’s appealing to them. You have layers to your personality. Your depth, your mystery, it makes them keep thinking about you and wanting to know more about you. They are drawn to how you’re a little unpredictable. It could be how you handle situations or how you carry yourself. They’ve seen moments where you show different sides of yourself and it makes them more curious.
Will they confess their feelings? There’s good chance they’ll confess but they’re waiting for perfect opportunity. When the timing is right they’ll open up about how they feel, they’re not the type to be rushing things, they’re patient and want to make sure everything is perfect before making their move. When they’re about to confess, you’ll notice how they tried to get closer to you, starting dropping hints about their feelings, could be sending poets to you, or becoming more flirtatious. When you least expect it, this person will reveal how they feel.
What will happen between you two? There might be some challenges ahead. There’s possibility of misunderstandings or external pressures that could create tension between you, it doesn’t mean things are doomed though. You’ll just need to make it through disagreements carefully and stay open in communication. There could be some hesitation/baggage from past relationships that cause friction or perhaps you both have different expectations, you might need to clear some misunderstandings before move things forward.
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PILE 3
Cards: Thanatos, The Thread, 5 of Wands, Worth Waiting For, Ace of Wands rx, Fox, Yes!, The High Priestess
Who’s this person? I’m seeing a person who has gone through some significant challenges in life , perhaps they faced loss or major life transitions. They had to grow through difficult experiences and now are a stronger person. They might seem serious or deep because what they had to deal in the past. They also believe that everything in life is connected, they feel like their feeling for you has more meaning like there’s fate to why he has feeling to you.
In the past he lost someone close to them or could be went through breakup and it changed them. They’re not the type to show their emotions outwardly. They also believe the idea that people come into our lives for a reason.
They might be a Scorpio, Capricorn, Aries or Leo.
How do they feel about you? They feel conflicted. They’re attracted to you but at the same time they’re unsure on how to approach you. They feel like there’s inner tension, like they feel they have to compete to get your attention. They could also think that you’re interested in someone else. They feel a bit jealous or insecure because you could be having a friend who’s close to you and they feel like both of you have something more between you two. They want to confess their feelings but not sure how to compete for your attention or how to make themselves stand out.
What are their intentions? They want to wait for the right moment. They believe that timing is everything and they don’t want to rush things. They feel that if they’re patient, everything will work out between you two. They believe that you’re worth waiting for. They’re not the type to confess feelings right away. Maybe they’re waiting until you’re single or you’re not in talking stage with someone else. They believe that a relationship will happen naturally.
Why haven’t they confessed? I’m seeing that they lack the confidence to confess. Could be fear of rejection. They’re holding back because they feel now is not the right time as I said before they could be thinking you’re interested in someone else. They’re waiting for a “spark” or some sign that give them the green light.
What attracts them to you? They’re attracted to your cleverness and quick thinking. They admire you as someone who’s always a step ahead and how you handle situations intelligently. You’re also not easily fooled and they find your sharpness attractive. You always have smart solutions to problems and they noticed it. You might be the person who people turn to for advice , and your secret admirer love how sharp and quick witted you are.
Will they confess their feelings? Yes, they’ll confess at some point. But it might take the, some time to build up the courage but the answer is clear, they won’t keep their feelings a secret forever. Don’t be surprised if they start dropping hints soon or trying to spend more time with you.
What will happen between you two? Future between you two is still kind of a mystery. There’s a sense of strong connection but things might unfold slowly. This isn’t something that will happen overnight but with patience, after some times it could develop into something more. It will start with subtle and small gestures and you guys will become friends first before they’ll take more steps.
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PILE 4
Cards: The Heart, The Riddle, The Lovers, Playfulness, 5 of Wands, Birds/Owl, Within the next few months, The Magician
Who is this person? This is someone with a lot to give. Your secret admirer is someone that’s not always easy to figure out. They’re kind hearted and compassionate but they have mysterious side of them. They might not always show their true emotions or intentions right away. It takes times to truly understand the, but at the core they have lots of love to give.
They might be someone you know who’s kind and caring but they like to keep things to themselves. They’re kind of hard to read or maybe have a complicated personality but deep down they have strong feelings for you.
They could be a Gemini, Libra, Pisces, Scorpio or have these signs on their chart.
How do they feel about you? I see that they have deep and romantic feelings for you. They might see you as someone they can have serious relationship with. They see you more than just a fling or casual interest. They feel that you could be someone they have a deep bond with. They might also dream about being in committed relationship with you.
What are their intentions? They want to bring fun and lightheartedness into your life. They might not be the type to jump into something serious right away. They want to enjoy getting to know you and making memories together first. I’m seeing this person trying to make you laugh, cracking jokes and teasing you and them taking you out for hangouts. They’re interested in you but they feel like they want to be friend with you first as they feel relationship should be based on friendship.
Why haven’t they confessed yet? I feel like they’ve noticed that other people are also interested in you and not sure if they can compete just yet. They don’t want to complicate things or start drama and just want to play it safe right now. They also feel that you guys are not that close yet for him to confess.
What attracts them to you? They love how you communicate. Your intelligence, the way you speak, how you express yourself, they find it incredibly attractive. They’re drawn to your wisdom, how you think and how you can hold deep conversations. I see that they’ve heard you speak passionately about something and they admire how you always know right thing to say. Your ability to connect with people is something that they really appreciate.
Will they confess their feeling? There’s good chance they’ll confess their feelings in the next few months. It won’t happen immediately but it’s on their mind and they’re working towards making a move.
What will happen between you two? I’m seeing something magical happen between you two. The future is in your hands and you have power to develop this connection into whatever you want it to be. If you’re open to it, you could develop this relationship into either close friendship or romantic relationship. I’m seeing that this person is open to both as they’re happy whatever connection they’ll have with you.
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PILE 5
Cards: The Tear, The Destroyer, Strength, Soulmate, King of Swords, Rider, Be Assertive!, Ace of Chalices
Who is this person? I’m seeing a person who has been through some emotional pain and might still be dealing with it. They may be carrying past wounds and it makes them seem a bit guarded and distant at times. They’re in the phase of rebuilding themselves after something in their life happened. They don’t shy away from difficult emotions but they can sometimes get overwhelmed by them. They’re likely emotional but they don’t really like to show it. You might notice that this person are sometimes withdrawn or contemplative.
They could be a Aquarius, Gemini, Scorpio, Capricorn or have these signs on their big 6. I’m seeing some Leo too.
How do they feel about you? They admire your inner strength and the way you handle life’s ups and downs. You bring sense of calm and stability and they see you as someone who’s emotionally strong and reliable. Even though they’re dealing with their own emotional turmoil, they feel like they can find comfort in your presence. They feel that you’re supportive and calm. Your confidence and resilience attracts the, and they feel strong sense of respect for you.
What are their intentions? They feel a strong connection with you and belive that you could be their soulmate, but I’m sensing something that you should be careful about regarding this person. They might be not showing everything. There could be some emotional baggage or hidden intentions that they don’t reveal that could cause problems (some red flags about this person ).
Why haven’t they confessed yet? They’re trying to stay logical and overthinking the situation. They have a fear that if they confess now, they’ll lose control over the situation or make them seem vulnerable which is something they’re uncomfortable with.
I’m seeing that this person is a bit stoic and trying to protect themselves from being hurt again.
What attracts them to you? They’re attracted to your energy and your forward moving attitude. You come across to them as someone who’s always on the go and have sense of adventure or excitement about life. They admire how you take action and are not afraid to pursue what you want. You might be type of person who’s always tryin new things or simply living with life with sense of excitement and that attracts the, because they see you as someone who bring positive energy into their world.
Will they confess their feeling? They’ll but it will take tome. This is not the kind of person who rush into things but eventually they’ll muster up the courage to confess their feelings. They’re likely careful and methodical when it comes to expressing their emotions or feelings.
What will happen between you two? There’s strong potential for new romantic beginning. If they do open up, this connection could be very fulfilling emotionally. If you do want to pursue relationship/friendship with this person it will be filled with love , care and genuine connection. It’ll be a very nurturing and supportive connection. This person, if they decide to let their guard down is likely to be someone who’ll be very emotionally available and want to make lasting connection with you.
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PILE 6
Cards: The One, The Hunter, 2 of Chalices, Very Soon, The Stars, Dog, Listen to your Intuition, 6 of Wands
Who’s this person? They’re a focused and determined person. They know what they want and are not afraid to go after it. They’re someone who sets their sights on goals and pursue it relentlessly. They see you as “the one” and been thinking about you for a while and observing you from a distance. They have a single minded focus when it comes to their ambitions and you’re currently at the center of their thoughts.
They’re a persistent individual. They could be intense in their actions and a natural leader and also a go getter. They’re not the type to give up easily and people see them as very driven. They re protective and caring towards people important in their life.
They could be an Aries, Capricorn, Aquarius, Cancer, Pisces or have these signs or their chart.
How do they feel about you? They feel strong emotional connection with you and they see you as someone who complements them well. They feel like you and they would make a great match and they want to get closer to you. They feel like you are someone who is their equal, they see you as someone they can rely on. I’m feeling a vibe of 2 good friends. This could also be a person who’s close to you.
What are their intentions? They’re planning to make a move soon. They’re currently weighing their options and close to making a decision about how to approach you. They want to be clear about their intentions. They are decisive and know what they want but they’re cautious about choosing the right moment.
Why haven’t they confessed yet? They’re still waiting for right opportunity or hoping for some sign or clearer indication from you before they make a move. They may feel that this connection is destined. They may be a bit of a dreamer and believe in things like fate and destiny.
What attracts them to you? They’re attracted to your loyalty and dependability, they see that you are genuine and reliable. Someone that they can count on no matter what. They may also be attracted to your kindness and how you treat others. You’re always there for others ans they admire you for it. Your ability to stand by people you care about make you very appealing to them. They also appreciate your generosity and warm hearted nature.
Will they confess their feelings? They’re likely someone who values connection on deeper level and might wait for a time when they feel you are more open to receiving their feelings, they’re thoughtful and they might listen to their own intuition to guide them on when to make their move.
What will happen between you two? Things could go very well if they confess their feelings and two of you may end up in a happy relationship/friendship. This could be a relationship that both of you feel proud. This will be a connection that’s filled with pride, mutual support and achievement. They’re the type who’ll want to celebrate you and your connection. They’ll want everyone to know how much they care about you.
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i-am-shitpost · 1 year ago
Text
I went back and watched the scene where Fearne and Ashton discuss what to do with the shard and there’s some things I want us all to remind ourselves of:
Fearne explicitly says “if I do have any say in it, I think it should go to you. I don’t know if I want it.” And goes on to say that she feels Ashton is meant to hold both pieces.
Ashton says they know that Fearne would miss them if something happened to them (this is NOT in the context of the shard, but the mission overall) and thanks her for it
Then they say “it’s nice to feel love for people. I love having you…here”
When Ashton does float the idea of them taking the shard they say “I need you to promise me that we’re going to find a way to make it happen if we’re going to do it”
When discussing the plan, Ashton continually uses ‘we’, showing that he has always considered this their plan. Together. With equal say. And she can easily say no, Ashton would have accepted that answer. It’s specifically an “IF” question.
Ashton asks Fearne explicitly that if it goes wrong to “Please try and save my life. I’m not lookin’ to die”
This is explicitly not a martyr attempt
Ashton says he trusts Fearne more than they trust the others.
In regards to the plan, they word for word ask “Are you okay with that?”
Fearne responds “Yes I’m okay with that.”
There is no pressuring that goes along with this question whatsoever. Ashton outlines their idea for the plan, and then asks point blank.
He then apologizes for putting this on her.
Ashton also tells her “if it’s not okay it’s not your fault”
Ashton expresses that it’s nice having something to lose again, “So hopefully I won’t fucking lose it…again”
Other moments worth noting:
in the scene in Percy’s laboratory, Ashton says that “[they]’d like to feel safe…for once” when discussing how they’d like it to just be them and Fearne.
After getting kicked in the face and yelled at, Ashton immediately tells Fearne “that’s probably fair” holding no anger or resentment and validating her feelings as much as they could in their current state.
It was not manipulation. Fearne was not coerced. There were no double meanings. Ashton was straightforward as always. It wasn’t a recklessly planned or naive decision, they both felt this was the right call. It was not a martyr attempt either, Ashton did not want to die. But they felt this was the right call for the mission, so they stepped up and put their own neck on the line.
Ashton was being himself in a very stressful and gut-wrenching way, but it was not malicious or twisted. It was just terrifying.
Edit: I have removed a note about a comment made when Ashton kissed Fearne, I had misremembered the timing and delivery and hadn’t seen a clip of that scene circulating to rewatch yet, only the clocktower. Other than that, everything is accurate.
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