#i can pronounce them but I'd rather not
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Me on any given day: There's no rush for me to keep learning German. It's not like I'm planning to travel over there any time soon. I'll get back into it tomorrow (lie) ☺️
*My mutuals flooding my dash with German text posts because of a cop show*
#dj's random blog#my mum keeps telling me i should learn french instead because she can help me with that#but reading french isnt that hard if you're a good guesser#and i hate french r's#i can pronounce them but I'd rather not#im finding german easier to pronounce but the issue is practicing it regularly#thanks ADHD 😅
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induced to me by my contemporary art exam AND a rewatch of rebels after years that. got me into sabezra unexpectedly AND i updated krita and there were many new brushes i wanted to try
refs (IF U CAN PLS HELP ME FIND THE ORIGINAL COSPLAYERS i can't find anything EDIT: found them!! they're starwars_irl on insta and @rebelartistwren / lionesscosplay on insta. thank you guys <3) and ✨colored version✨ under the cut
i can't find themmmmm I've been looking for 2 days but all i found were uncredited reposts
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anyway they look amazing
i really wanted to try greyscaling but I'm not sure it looks good. idk. + while i was making it i was listening to i love you by fontaines d.c. (GREAT SONG FROM A GREAT UNDERRATED BAND) and. the grey fit into that mood much better
also two versions without the sketch lines. where ezra looks happier even if they're uglier
#i didn't expect to like them as a ship ngl. but there are some moments that recall kanera (AND I LOVE THEM) especially if you've read#a new dawn. and IDK COOL!! probably i didn't ship them from the start because. in s1-s2 they're just kids and everytime i reach s3 i keep#brainrotting on thrawn <3 and kallus <3 and zeb <3 idk i kinda forgot about them and all the scenes they were in LMAO#ALSO. i love you is truly a wonderful song wtf?? it's not something I'd associate to sabezra BUT probably after having listened to it for a#month. and having drawn this in the meantime. i found some connections. the fact that the songs alternated between that melodic part#that talks about love to the other verses about (very generally) society. just felt like how their relationship would go. rapidly switching#between the fast paced fights for the rebellion to the calm of the preparation they require that can allow them for some tenderness. ALSO#ezra is so much “if there was sunshine it was never on me / so close the rain; so pronounced is the pain”#and sabine is pretty much “you only open the window; never open up the door” sometimes. especially before her darksaber arc#btw i know this song is about ireland and their relationship with theid country BUT it just prompted me to their grey figures#and colorful background. also. there's something about klimt making some of the most tender representations of love ever imo BUT keep#choosing to represent rather dark iconographies whenever he's asked to do something (I'm thinking about the medicine panels for the uni)#like. there is a similar contrast in there as well. also i like that. ursa had a portrait of herself in her home that referenced klimt#like. it's ursa in her prime; in a literal golden age. i can imagine sabine associating a good moment - one of her bests - to such an#expressive decoration. and maybe stripping colors away when that moment is gone and all that remains is the memory and feeling#OKAY WHY DID I TALK SO MUCH i must've put more thought on this that i previously thought. crazy#it started as a fun experiment to try krita's oil brushes. *in david byrne's voice* how did i get here?#star wars#sw#star wars rebels#star wars fanart#star wars rebels fanart#ezra bridger#sabine wren#ezrabine#sabezra#sabine wren fanart#ezra bridger fanart#sw fanart#g posting
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Don't Use Duolingo if You Really Want to Learn Irish
That title is a bit dramatic, but I really don't think that duolingo is a useful tool for Irish, especially in its current state, so I want to talk a bit about why, and I'll also talk about some alternatives.
Pronunciation
The first and most egregious issue is that at some point recently-ish, duo decided to start using Text-To-Speech for their Irish course, rather than recordings of a native speaker. The problem here is that their TTS is not trained on native speakers of Irish and pronounces words incorrectly. It doesn't make consistent distinctions between broad and slender consonants for example.
Irish has no standard pronunciation, so I understand how it can feel weird to choose just one dialect for the purposes of pronunciation (the old recordings were from a speaker of Galway Irish), but having just one dialect is much better than TTS which sounds like a learner, imagine if they had TTS for the French course which sounded like an anglophone schoolkid trying to pronounce french, and claimed they were teaching you how to speak french!
Grammar
Duo tends to be correct on grammar at least, which is a start. But often people using it get very confused about the grammar because duo doesn't explain any of it. I think there's a place for immersion in language learning, and I don't think everything has to be explained like that, but within duo's system of sentence testing and exercises like that, not having any explanation for why it's "mo chóta" and not "mo cóta" can be really confusing. Duo used to have more grammar information, it's a shame that they removed it, I wonder why they did it.
Money and Motivation
Duolingo is a business, and their motivation is not to help you learn a language 'fully', but to keep you using their app and hopefully have a higher chance of sharing it with others, competing with others, buying or causing others to buy memberships or lingots or any other in-app purchases.
I don't want to make it out like duo is some big conspiracy and they're tricking people, I don't think that's the case, but it's good to remember that their primary motivation is to keep people using the app, rather than help people move to a level in a language where they don't need the app anymore.
Keep this in mind whenever you see people trying to sell you stuff for language learning.
Why do people use Duolingo
I do get it, and I don't want to make anyone feel bad for using duo, there's a ton of reasons people tend towards it at first 1. It's really well known, so especially if you're learning a language and haven't heard of other resources for it, you'll check duolingo 2. It's very motivating for a lot of people, checking in every day and forming that habit is a really good way of sticking with a language 3. It's fun, people enjoy it
If you use it for reason 3. and you still like it, then don't worry about this post, I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yums, keep having fun!
If you use it for reasons 1. or 2. you can still keep using it if you like, but I want to suggest some other things which you might find helpful in trying to get to a higher level in Irish.
Other Resources
To address the pronunciation issue, I'd heavily recommend you disregard the pronunciation in duolingo, if you're looking for more reliable sources of pronunciation, I'd look towards recordings of native speakers, you can find that on:
Teanglann and Foclóir (they use the same recordings)
Fuaimeanna
and a really useful and underused one: https://davissandefur.github.io/minimal-pairs/ where you can hear the difference between similar sounds that English speakers often mix up in Irish.
A lot of people like duolingo because it's nice to have a clear path forward, a progression that you can get into without too much decision-making. For this I recommend getting a good textbook or course and working through it, the ones I'll recommend also have native speaker audio on them.
Learning Irish by Mícheál Ó Siadhail, this book teaches Galway Irish, not just in pronunciation but in grammar too. It's quite dense but it's well thought out and well explained.
Teach Yourself Irish (1961) this book is available for free online, and is a really good option if you're interested in Cork Irish (Munster), and have some experience with grammatical terminology. I used this book myself and really liked it, but it's very intense and not for everyone. (If you do end up using it, feel free to skip the appendices at the start, they're more of a reference and sometimes put people off from actually getting to the first chapter. Also if you have any questions about it or need any help just let me know.)
If you want a video course, there's a great course called "Now You're Talking" which is available for free online, along with audio files and worksheets here. It features Donegal Irish and leads into the more intermediate level course called Céim ar Aghaidh also available online.
There's other textbooks that I have less experience with (Buntús na Gaeilge, Gaeilge/Gramadach Gan Stró, etc.) but if they work for you, stick with them, there's nothing worse than not making progress because you keep switching resources trying to find the "perfect one"
Whether or not you continue to use Duolingo, I would really really encourage you to try engaging with media in Irish. People often shy away from this when they're learning because they don't feel like they're "ready" yet. But you basically never feel like you're ready, you just have to try and find something near your level and try to get comfortable with not understanding everything. This is where you learn a huge portion of the language, you hear how things are pronounced you see what words mean in what contexts, getting input in your target language is so important!
I know content can be kind of hard to find, so I'll make a few recommendations here: There's a wealth of content available for free online (more if you're in ireland but some internationally) on TG4 If you're still starting out, I'd recommend trying to watch some kids shows since they'll have simpler language and will be easier to follow. I wouldn't recommend using English subtitles when you watch them. Some good options include:
Dónall Dána: an Irish dub of Horrid Henry, silly and childish but the actors have good Irish and importantly the show has Irish language subtitles, they don't always match but if you're still beginning and can't necessarily get everything by ear, they're really useful. (Mostly Galway Irish)
Curious George: another dub, again with Irish language subtitles (I can't remember what dialects were in it off the top of my head but I'd assume mostly galway again)
Seó Luna: No subtitles, but a good option if you're aiming for Munster Irish, the lead character has Kerry Irish
Miraculous: No subtitles but a better show than most of the other kids' ones and more bearable to watch as an adult (Mostly Galway Irish)
Ros na Rún: Moving away from kids shows, a long running soap opera, this has Irish subtitles and a really good mix of dialects within the show. If you're finding the kids shows boring or too easy I'd really recommend it, but it can be complex because of the amount of characters, dialects, and plotlines. I'd recommend starting at the beginning of a newer season and just trying to catch on to what's happening as you go.
There are a lot of books, if you live in Ireland you can get nearly any Irish book for free from a library, so please check out your local library or request some of these from other libraries in the system:
There's a series of fairytales (Rápúnzell, Luaithríona etc.) by Máiréad Ní Ghráda which are illustrated and for children, which are a really good option for when you're just starting out reading
There's kids books about Fionn and the Fianna by Tadhg Mac Dhonnagáin
There's a cute little kids' book in Kerry Irish about a cat named Mábúis
Leabhar Breac has a lot of graphic novels, some of them based on Irish mythology, some on other stuff. The fact that they're illustrated can make it a lot easier to follow even if you don't understand all the words at first.
Gliadar has just released their Scott Pilgrim translation
If you're looking for something a bit more advanced you can look at some of the books for adult learners by Comhar, they contain simplified language and glossaries but have full original adult stories.
And if you're wanting full, natural, native-level Irish there's a load of books by those same groups, and others like An Gúm, Cló Iar-Chonnacht, Oidhreacht Chorca Dhuibhne, Éabhlóid, Coiscéim, and more.
And don't shy away from older books written in Seanchló either, they can be more challenging but it's a whole extra world of books
If you're trying to improve your listening comprehension, I definitely recommend listening to shows on Raidió na Gaeltachta, hearing native Irish speakers talk at full speed is really good practice. But I get that it can be overwhelming at first. Here are some things you can do as you build up to that:
Watching those same TV shows I mentioned without subtitles is a good way to build up listening skills.
Vifax is a website where you can practice listening to short news segments and answer questions on them, then getting to look at the transcript with notes afterwards.
Snas is kind of the evolution of vifax, now using clips from both the news and Ros na Rún.
I really hope that this post can help people move away from duolingo if they're looking to take their Irish learning to the next level, if you've got any questions, just let me know!
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Could I maybe get an NSFW alphabet plz with male reader? Thanks!
NSFW ALPHABET - KÖNIG
navigation
genre: smut
characters: König
A/n: a friend pf mine pronounces his name like qwajnk.
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Oh boy. He doesn't really seem like it but he really fucking likes cuddles. He definitely uses his height to his advantage. (You're getting grounded, literary) He is a little self-conscious after sex. He knows he's big. He also knows he could hurt you pretty badly. Thoughts of you hating him or losing interest fill his head. He just has to grab you and make sure you stay there with him.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
He loves his arms. You can grab on them, and it makes them seem even bigger than they already are. He likes putting you in a chokehold.
What he favours the most in you are your legs. Thighs specifically. He doesn't really have a reason for it. He just likes them. Let the man get some thighs.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Average texture, not super thick, but also not watery. Hex - f3f5e6 Big man big load. Usually pulls out and catches it in his hand. (He doesn't want to add work by having to clean anything up) He also doesn't really want you to swallow it. He is mature he doesn't need a porn actor who will do anything to satisfy a dude. He'd rather have real sex.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He doesn't fit in a fleshlight. He's pretty embarrassed about the whole thing.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
He's over 40. Definitely has a pretty big body count. About 27 I'd say. (counting one-night stands) He finally found someone on whom he can use his knowledge on.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Spooning or the seashell.
When he spoons you he can put you in a chokehold, making you fight back a little. On the other hand, when he bends your legs you won't be able to fucking move.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Serious but not a nerd kinda serious. He just doesn't speak much.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He keeps a solid bush on there. (He does make sure to clean it properly) It is not messy. He's got a little thicker happy trail. And he's a pretty brunet down there.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He can be pretty brutal both with his actions and with his words. Or he can be soft with both. It depends on both of your moods.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
This testosterone-filled man definitely jerks off. Even when you are around (Doesn't try to hide it)
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Being in control. I mean, can you blame him. He has the perfect body and occupation for it. Speaking of body.
Size difference. Again it just feels right.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
He could fuck anywhere. Even tho he likes it the most from the safety of your bedroom he wouldn't mind a public bathroom or a friend's bedroom. He likes to be sneaky. Has never been caught once.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Anything.
Do anything he's hard instantly. That's why he jerks off so much.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
If you want it he wants it. Except threesomes. He wants you for himself. Who could blame him when he has such a pretty thing only for him. Why would he share
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Receiving. He isn't bad at giving but he can use his hands and dick way better than his mought.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Fast and rough all the way. He loves to be in control and he's got all this raw strength and energy. Why not use it?
He also likes the slow and sensual. Both of you need a break sometimes.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He'd go for them more often, but he doesn't really want to bother you. Another reason for him jerking off a lot.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He’s always pulling you to the side, finding a place to make you take him. He is obsessed of holding the door to make sure no one gets in.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
This dude. Bruv can go as long as you can go. He will take you to the stars and back and it’ll take him only a minute to catch his breath.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Not a fan of them. He’d rather have you on his dick not some plastic. He doesn’t find much pleasure in them either.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Based on his mood.
He could play with you as he holds you down.
Or he could be quick about it.
He for sure doesn’t mind teasing you. Touching your thigh is his favourite way to do so.
V = Volume (how loud are they, what sounds they make, etc.)
He is dead silent. Sometimes it freaks you out. But if he finds out you enjoy the sounds he makes he will definitely try to add more of ‘em
Slight sighing when he lays his body on yours, little grunts and the occasional “fuck”
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He’s into stalking. It doesn’t matter of it’s you stalking him or the other way around. He loves the thrill.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
7.5 inches abnormaly thick. #e0ae82 base #ba7f68 tip. Slightly curved to the left.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Boy can go anywhere anytime. Public bathroom, bed, a random fucking room. He’s always thinking of it. Hard 24/7
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
He likes to talk a bit afterwards but he will fall asleep like a baby right after he’s done.
#cod x y/n#cod requests#cod x you#cod x male reader#cod x reader#cod mw2#cod mwii#mw2#call of duty#konig mw2#konig cod#konig x male reader#konig x reader#könig#könig x male reader#könig x reader#konig headcanons#konig x you#cod x gn!reader#konig smut#smut#requests are open#requests open
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12 nitpicks with "Baldur's Gate 3"
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This is a game I hadn't expected to love as much as I do--I think it's one of the best I've ever played--but just to play DA for a second, I thought I'd be nit-picky with some things about it (not that I'm ungrateful, Larian!)
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Halsin's romance is rushed and lackluster--Halsin can only be recruited if you join the druids and tieflings against the goblins, and his storyline is only covered in Act II of the game with the Shadow Curse. Afterwards, he's just along for the ride, and if he becomes a love interest, you only get one romance scene followed by flowery words from him when addressing Tav, and the nature of your relationship is confusing, since Halsin finds the word foreign, emphasizes (optional) polyamory, and the implication from other love interests is that you're just sleeping with him. Seeing how the game was eventually patched so you could recruit both Halsin and Minthara, I do wish that it was made that way to begin with, with both of them having more pronounced arcs throughout the story. I have heard that they had cut content, so it'd be nice if it was reinstated someday.
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2. The female companions are racially more diverse than the male companions--This isn't really an issue for me, but an observation; for female companions, we have a Githyanki, a drow, two half-elfs, and a tiefling, while for male companions we have two elves and three humans. I suppose they didn't wanna experiment too much for male companions, but I could've seen Halsin as a half-orc like Jord, and Wyll a dragonborn--not that I'd trade out their designs as-is; that's just an observation.
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3. We get Yenna in our camp, and she adds nothing--After having the spirit of nature AND a tiefling with newly discovered magic powers in our camp in Act II, getting an average human kid in Act III just because felt dissatisfying. Yenna will come up to you, regardless of whether you're invisible or not, when she will tell you that she can't find her mom. After talking with her, she'll appear in camp a few days later and ask to stay. You can say "no," but it's a weird option anyway. Plus if you do as I did and just misty step off the cliff into town to avoid talking to her, she will still be Orin's victim if the others are not available, even if you never meet her (note: I do not know how this works if the other options aren't available and Yenna is dead). And even when you rescue her, there's the guilt because her mom and her cat are dead, so you kinda feel like you have to let her join. I'd much rather keep Arabella, or find a way for Thaniel and Oliver to bond and then separate, with one of them joining us on the journey if Halsin is recruited. Or another option...
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4. Lae'zel and Shadowheart have similar storylines--While the details are different, the overall plot is the same; both women find out that they've been lied to by the culture they've grown up in, and have to decide how they feel about it. The difference is that Lae'zel can choose between helping Vlakith, Orpheus, or stay out of the Githyanki conflict, while Shadowheart just gets to choose between following Shar or turning her back on her. That said, Shadowheart's storyline is much more satisfying and emotional since the goddess erased her memory and now she has to decide how to take that. With Lae'zel, she never really evaluates what it means to be independent like Shadowheart does, first swearing loyalty to Vlakith, then joining Voss when she seems to be lying, and becoming intent on freeing Orpheus when she finds out he's been kept away. Only at the end can you tell her to find her own path. Because her culture highlights strength and a warrior lifestyle, the similar arc she has to Shadowheart can't be executed as well. In fact, one unique thing about Lae'zel's storyline never comes into play during the main story: the githyanki egg. She'll mention feeling bonded to it, and will say it hatched during the epilogue, and that she named him and wants him to choose his own path in life (which doesn't really fit if she chose to stay with Vlakith or Orpheus, imo). It would've been nice if Xan was hatched and kept in our camp, or if the egg is taken from us immediately after leaving the creche, and we have the option to rescue Xan from the SoB and let him join us.
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5. Astarion's viewpoint/approval doesn't change--I'm in the minority here I'm sure, but given the sympathy people give Astarion due to his past as an abuse victim and Astarion learning to love himself, I do wish the change was a bit more impactful, with Astarion showing more compassion for others and certain altruistic or optimistic choices earning his approval. Even in Act III, there are a couple of times you get to say you can't believe he's letting his family be led to the slaughter or think of harming them. He'll respond that they're screwed anyway or that no one else looked out for him except you. It doesn't feel like as much progress has been made, and even after Cazador's mission, he's still himself, just with less burdens and more closure. His epilogue epiphany of people not minding you committing murder if it's bad people feels like something he should've learned along the way.
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6. Romance initiation is based on the afterparty, for the most part--People will say that initiating a romance isn't dependent on the goblin/tiefling party, but I've only had ONE time where I had the chance to begin a romance began afterwards--or at least, one time where it was someone I was interested in (there were a couple times Lae'zel flirted with me). In my experience, it's very difficult to start a romance after the party, despite having a lot of approval. I'd rather there be a perpetual romance option to pick when talking to a companion, and them accepting once you have enough approval, rather than them coming to you.
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7. Karlach's only ending is the "bad/sad" ending--As many will tell you, there was a planned Upper City portion of Act III that included furthering Karlach's quest, with the ending we got in the final version being the bad ending if we neglected her quest. I understand cutting content, but since literally EVERYONE ELSE'S fate is dependent on your decisions (Shadowheart and Lae'zel's loyalties, Wyll being a devil or not, Astarion completing the ritual and killing the spawn, killing Minsc and Jaheira leaving, saving Minthara, Halsin's resolving the Shadow Curse or not, Gale giving into his ambition), Karlach should've gotten the same treatment. If a section had to be removed, they could've moved her quests to the sections of the game that we did get.
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8. Getting Minsc when we could've gotten Rolan--While Minsc is a neat companion to have, his lack of a storyline (outside of his recruitment) and being a non-romanceable companion makes him feel almost like a wasted slot to me. If we wanted to add another male companion, I definitely feel like Rolan would've been a better companion, coming across as a cross between Astarion and Gale due to his cockiness and ambitious nature. It'd be fun if he was recruited in Act II after rescuing his siblings; honestly, he wouldn't be on any worse footing than Minthara and Halsin for having limited content, but Rolan has the added benefit of having family that we can interact with, joining Wyll and Shadowheart as the few companions who do. In fact...
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9. Only plot-relevant backstories--Okay, this is a real nit-pick, but that's the title of the post! For the most part, characters only mention their past in relation to their quests, though there are brief exceptions: Wyll, Minthara, and Karlach mentioning their mothers, and Tara mentioning Gale's mom. Maybe I just didn't get the dialogue, but I do wish we got more about each character's childhood/backgrounds--and not just in a one-convo-type thing like the aforementioned individuals. I guess I have to give Astarion a pass since he says that after being a vampire for centuries, he can't even remember his eye color, let alone his life before, aside from being a magistrate (which I find SUPER interesting). Plus it'd be interesting to hear more about old flames like Gale and Halsin mentioned, and the conquests Astarion reunited with as spawn.
10. Act II slimming down the number of tieflings--If you do nothing to help the tieflings or side with the goblins during the raid, all of the tieflings die. However, even if you side with the tieflings and defeat the goblins' leaders, several tieflings will die anyway. When cultists corner them in the shadowcursed lands, Zevlor is distracted by the Absolute while the other tieflings are kidnapped and brought to Moonrise Towers, find their way to the Last Light Inn, or are killed on the spot--or in the case of Arabella's parents, killed after escaping the cultists and trying to hide. While these things happen in war (or cultist territory), it felt disheartening to see that the people you went through all the trouble of saving died anyway. It's almost a waste.
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11. To be young--This is really scrapping the bottom of the barrel, but I do wish we could make Tav look a bit younger (I think you can look younger than this picture, but this is just a visual aid). I also have this nit-pick for some of the companions, but I'm sure a mod for that will eventually be approved.
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12. Getting companions to romance each other--This isn't something I need as much as the other things, but it's still something I thought about when watching origin playthroughs. To my understanding, they're all pansexual (personally I imagine Karlach, Astarion, Lae'zel, Jaheira, and Minthara as male-leaning pansexuals and Gale, Wyll, Shadowheart, Minsc, and Shadowheart as female-leaning pansexuals while Halsin is middle of the road; no idea why, just the vibes), and it'd be fun to pair them up together. Not saying there are endless combinations; I can imagine Gale/Astarion wouldn't be something that exists in the Tav route (especially after Astarion straight-up told me he doesn't want an open relationship/polycule with Gale), but Karlach/Wyll, Lae'zel/Shadowheart, Jaheira/Minsc, Karlach/Gale, Gale/Wyll, and Astarion/Halsin are ships I think of being possible.
Don't kill me! I already love the game as-is, but I did want to point these things out. I was also gonna include a other nitpicks such as the option to have kids/discussing it and Aylin/Isobel being active companions and not just space fillers at camp, but maybe I'll save that for another nitpick post.
#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 3#bg3#larian#larian studios#halsin#wyll#wyll ravengard#astarion#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#lae'zel#shadowheart#karlach#minthara#minsc#jaheira#tav#arabella#rolan
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Hi Mr. Gaiman,
As an accomplished author with several books under his belt, how do you know that a story is a dud for lack of a better word? I have a million ideas bouncing around inside my head at all times, and while I consider them good ideas worth pursuing, how am I sure they will make a good story?
I ask this because I have been dwelling on something one of my professors said last semester. He held a seminar on poetry and got to the topic of fiction writing, where he stated that he had just recently finished a story he had rewritten several times over the course of multiple years. Now I myself write as a hobby with a faint imagining that someone might see it in the future, and I have written a dud or two, where the plot was poorly formed and the ideas behind it just had a flaw somewhere in the base concept. Perhaps this is my youth and amateurity speaking, but I was under the impression that given enough time and care, any story could recover from that stage so long as it had not been completed yet. Ideas would need to be reworked, concepts retooled, characters redrawn, but the very basic idea could still survive in a different format.
My professor disagreed, stating that he has destroyed 400-500 page novels that he has written before upon realizing said fatal flaw. He stated that the story was in a state that it could not recover from, and that many authors encounter ideas that seem good at the time, but stink later on to such a degree that the basic premise must be thrown out. This seems like a tremendous loss of work to me. As writing is an art form, it feels somewhat similar to destroying practice sketches and 'meh' oil paintings that showcase the artist's progress. An idea that stinks today might be able to work from a different angle later on in my opinion.
I suppose after rambling my question is now this: are some ideas and concepts just not worth pursuing? Are some story concepts flawed from the get-go and impossible to save, and is there a way to tell that before writing the whole thing? Is it even possible to waste that time as you're getting in practice for the next tale?This isn't something I ever really thought about before being told in sure tones that this is how things work by someone with a degree is this, so I figured I'd ask the professional author for a second opinion. Apologies for the length of the message, especially if this is one you've received before.
I have things that have stalled and a few stories that, when they were done, went to the box in the attic rather than to anyone who could publish them (there's a whole novel there I wrote when I was 21). But mostly because I was writing serial comics, failure was not an option, and if something did fail it had done it in public for everyone to see. And I learned that some things I thought were failures had actually worked really well.
Some people are afraid of failure. Some people are afraid of success, which can also be a good reason for junking books and never showing them to anyone. As long as you pronounce them irretrievably flawed and show them to nobody, you will never be judged for them or have to deal with either success or failure.
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SHORT STORY + BONUSES (read it like when gollum says bagginses) INTERMISSION!!! Today we'll take some time to dive into the Harrow bonuses and a couple of short stories, one of which I should have read before, but such is life.
previously, in the tlt universe:
I finished harrowcita del 9
Bonus 1: BoE google doc for the soldiers
differently from the other recaps, I did these while I was reading them, not when I finished reading a whole chapter/story
so maybe the thoughts are more rambly than usual
sorry about that
ANYWAY I have to give it to the BoE folks, they've got a lot to deal with over here
they're like the audience, coming into this blind
and have to try to understand how necromancers operate on the fly
'bullet to the head but don't be too confident on that' seems to be the most useful tidbit
it's like a resident evil gameplay
BoE is in resident evil, gideon is in survivor and harrow is in a gothic pulp novel
the advice for engaging lyctors is "avoid them at all costs"
I keep spelling it BoA instead of BoE because of her
blood of adam? blood of awake me up when september ends? idk
Pronounciation guide (aka I do what I want, but apparently pronounce nonagesimus like the author)
dr reverend emperor john chose the name gaius for himself, it wasn't his real name
gaius sounds like gallo, the spanish name for gallus gallus domesticus, which in english would translate to cock and alludes to the fact that he is a dick
agustine is pronounced like in english and not like in spanish (agustín), I have been pronouncing that one right but I could have called him agustín all this time
cassiopeia was a queen but we already knew that
sixth house, ceramics, cooking, checks every one of my boxes
"CRIS-ta-bell. Rather than “crees”."
what is the difference oh my god is there a difference there
pyrrah is achilles's drag name, which is cool
valancy and cyrus were like this
I'm still gonna call the mithraeum mithrandir whatnot the emperor's bolthole, it's in the sacred text
the nonniad is in dactylic enneameter, which is a ninth version of greek epics (which are hexameters) and it's making me send my ancient greek professor from uni good vibes wherever he is
Glossary
we know more about the beasts now, or have more ordered info, the gist of it is this
so the RBs are only the nine OGs from the nine planets of dominicus that the emperor fucked up
those are the ones that can go from the river to the physical world and viceversa
the other minor beasts can only exist in the river
I still think this is all the emperor's and the lyctors's fault for starting this nonsense and killing planets for power and whatnot
so yeah, Consequences of your Actions, johnny boy
the heralds, as we had established, are kind of like borg, responding to the RBs
necromancers kinda go mad at all this as if they were looking at cthulhu
I wanted to google what the two first verses of wake's name were but the first results that pop up are tlt sources and I'm not looking into that, in case of spoilers
I've already come this far without massive spoilers, I'm not gonna risk that now
what quotes would you like to have as a name if you were one of these folks?
If I could choose three, I'd probably pick: Yo tengo el corazón como la espuma / das Leben Sie nicht vergessen hat, daß es Sie in der Hand hält / Quieto en la tierra y sentir que mis pies tienen raíz
probably un monceau d’idées et un monceau de douleurs would be another contender considered
idk how that'd be shortened though, maybe espie because espuma
house quiz was book 1, boe name assignment is book 2
The Mysterious Study of Doctor [tumblr keeps blocking my post and I'm gonna try to avoid this word to see if this is it]
ANYWAY, SIXTH HOUSE TIME
from the blurb I can tell that:
1) all this time I thought Dr S was like a funny nickname someone had given palmolive for being correspondence-horny lmao
2) is this the magnus institute???
3) "Enter Palamedes Sextus and Camilla Hect, age thirteen" we're gonna look at some baby picturessss
"Every thirteen-year-old necromancer in the Sixth House is gifted."
"I was born with four kids in my generation eligible to produce children with me. Palamedes had two"
maybe that's why he went for a correspondence gf
camilla describing that's she's the best and me just going
this thing of 'being attractive' as a category would get me demoted at the sixth, though
but working in data, I can do that
I am really liking archivist zeta
there's something that was sealed for a lot of years and now is unsealed and that's very exciting!!!!
lost media!!!!
so many stairs would be a problem for me, but there's lost media at the end of the tunnel
archivist zeta: don't touch anything
palmolive: including the bone hands?
archivist zeta: the what now
apparently the hands are younger than the time the room has been sealed
with the forms being color-coded, I'm starting to think this is less magnus institute and more office of incident assessment and response
them making references to other houses remind me that other houses socialized, seeing everything from the ninth made me feel like everyone was isolated all the time lol
add to my list of sixth house love the fact that we have murder mysteries now too
gotta love the sixth house
kinda ominous the hand bones now that we know what we know, of camilla carrying palmolive as a tamagotchi in a bone hand after harrow changed the skull
palmolive and camilla age 13 are a whole other book I would have devoured at age 13 myself btw
giving me his dark materials vibes
there was a skeleton in the air vents above the hands
camilla says she's gonna start taking measuring tape with her alongside everything else and I also can relate to going places with 25 million things, just in case
palmolive steals pens, apparently
I've used this meme for palmolive before but it still fits
the skeleton was possessed by the dr himself, he got kinda stuck on his way there after the fifth person tried to call him and got his hands into his study through skeleton shenaningans
palmolive needs to touch something in order to prove the "why" and everyone votes in favor, because he's on a roll
the cool wooden orb that was in the desk was a cool wooden puzzle, like the Karakuri Creation Group ones
man, I love those
the dr solving a puzzle after his death and coming back to prove it is me with some niche puzzles I used to have a sideblog for
don't ask me
there was paper inside and everyone got outside super fast and started congratulating each other (hello????? you did nothing????) and shaking camilla's and palmolive's hands
they don't wanna give palmolive multiple points for solving a several hundread years old mystery, which isn't fair tbh
"Don’t expire in a fit of hubris." oofffffffff
the paper had letters, which palmolive thinks are love letters
with his years of experience on pining letters
the one at the ends says "Tomorrow you will become a Lyctor and finally go where I can’t follow"
is this about cassie??? aka cassiopeia????
loved the camilla and palmolive murder mystery dinner
As Yet Unsent
this is judith's diary and this is how I imagine she looked while writing it and judging people
judith assisted the BoE with her own healing but it's kinda tough when you're also handcuffed and with your eyes covered and whatnot
judith is still in the emperor's side
I don't blame her, she hasn't met the man
yandere twin has met him and still saved him so, I can't judge judith too much
there's a corpse that isn't rotting
promising stuff
there's a commander called We Suffer
they're wearing masks and camilla is being "converted" to their cause
and she didn't even meet the man, but apparently BoE had contact with the sixth house at some point in the past
cassie?????? is this you??????? who knows
sixth house though, earning more points
also, camilla says that palmolive would want to find out what they know and, you know what, fair
I would too
camilla is also good at chess, because she's good at everything
they're playing ceiling chess like in queen's gambit
judith thinks about martita, who will soon do some awesome things next to mati nonnius
judith is also marinating the fact that everyone was fooled by the twinsies and the fact that regina george twin has no necromancy
she also complains about her being too emotional and prone to trust people
every point regina george twin makes about BoE sounds pretty solid to me tbh
the more I see, the more I think the emperor is a dick, like his name implies
judith argues with regina george twin a lot but also notices that her ears go pink when she's impassioned so...why are you noticing that judith????
how did you notice that???? *smirks knowingly*
judith has to deal with the limitations of medical care when you don't have a bunch of people who do body magic stuff
so she's dealing with recovery in a slow way and with machines plugged to her
it's hard for her because she was from the house where necros are also very able to do physical stuff
camilla is giving her strongly worded positive reinforcement
regina george twin and judith have a lot of moments that go from flirty to fighting
I can't keep using smirk reactions images so (¬‿¬)
regina george twin is also being trained to be rambo barbie and I think that suits her
"In a different time I would have found ways to apologise to Palamedes Sextus, whom I at the very least critically misjudged"
palmolive always getting the indirect compliments my goodness
he's so popular
"The princess has by turns tried to charm Camilla, play with Camilla, flirt with Camilla, and cajole Camilla. Camilla is currently unmoved"
nobody's good enough for her, regina george twin, move along
regina george twin is also being kinda aphobic towards judith's response on her being uninterested to romance camilla
I don't think judith is aro at all but that doesn't mean we have to be assholes about it, regina george twin, thank you
judith and regina george twin think BoE is wrong about necros having orgies and I'm here like
so, apparently, judith propositioned martita because she was pretty much obsessed with her
and martita said no
and she thinks camilla is holding onto tamgagotchi palmolive out of some sense of not wanting to let go of him
unaware of the fact that he's in his river loft waiting for his bones to be womanhandled by harrowcita
also, the BoE has an old ship that judith wasn't helpful with, so they don't really have much patience with her
regina george twin and judith keep flirting in that intense tlt way
I'm starting to think regina george twin has a big crush on judith and I'm here for the dynamics of that
"It said, Ugh! Then it said, Eugh!" is this mercygirl??? it sounds like mercygirl to me
and fixing someone's insides as if they were cleaning a sewing machine also sounds very mercygirl
mercygirl is also curious about this body that doesn't rot and I wanna know what it is because I want so bad for it to be gideon-related but I can't let myself hope
also, she gave them the coordinates to find harrow in the cool planet
"And Camilla said, The Warden and I know they can die like anyone else" 👀
"The corpse of the Ninth House cavalier is as pristine as when Camilla Hect convinced them to take it on board"
YESSSSSSS
YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
MY HOPES WEREN'T UNWARRANTED
LET'S GOOOOOOOOO
GIDEON ARMS INTACT BABYYYYYYYY
regina george twin proposes necro-cav marriage to judith and judith says no because no relationship here can be straightforward
"Why would I ever knowingly take Coronabeth Tridentarius’s, having desired her already for twelve long, stupid, fruitless years?!"
DRAMAAAAA
AND THAT'S IT!!!! FINALLY!!! This took me a lot longer than I wanted it too but I enjoyed the stories ♥ See you in the next one!!
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sonic movie 3 stobotnik thoughts:
Watched the third installment earlier today and have a lot of thoughts
Likes:
Stone being confirmed as the protector in their relationship (His action scene in the chao garden restaurant and his plea 'i'm not there to protect you!') was amazing, you can definitely tell Stone had been traumatized after Robotnik got stranded in the mushroom world and then returned only to nearly fall to his death
'I already lost you once-!' 'Unsubscribed blocked and reported.' 'I can't lose you again...' Stone you deserve the world and so much better than Robotnik i'm sorry your hearts deadset on this dickhead <3
Robotnik's first name Ivo being dropped several times and pronounced eye-vo rather than ee-vo. always preferred the eye-vo pronounciation personally, feel like ee-vo is a bit too on the nose and doesn't sound as good.
Robotnik being open enough around Stone at the very start of the movie that he casually mentions that Stone is the only person he trusts and at the very end after he thought he found loving family only to be rejected and betrayed by Gerald admitting Stone was the only one to ever truly care about him my heart can't
More of the weird kinky BDSM shit my beloved - Eggman's reaction to seeing a shirtless tied up Stone 'Do that in your own time you sicken me' sent me as did the frigging shirt snatch and of course that glorious haircut scene
Stone getting to interact with characters that aren't Eggman. Him calling Tails adorable and that short moment where he hung out with Shadow was nice to see.
Again the haircut scene. Stone had zero excuses for straddling his bosses lap and nearly strangling him in a chokehold. Firestarter by Prodigy playing was just the cherry on top.
Stone getting cucked again by Robotnik's own grandpapa. First knuckles now sour gramps smh there's always a damn third wheel
Robotnik finally finding family and just CLINGING to them (quite literally the boot kissing scene was... something.) Ivo was so desperate for Gerald's love and approval, its such a great parallel to Stone's admiration for Robotnik. Honestly it makes sense that Robotnik immediately reacted so defensively when Stone warned him of Gerald and Shadows hidden plan, like Robotnik immediately reacted by attacking Stone back by accusing him of just being jealous because he felt his bond with gerald was being threatened. Robotnik even looked over at Gerald several times while he was chewing Stone out, clearly seeking his approval.
Eggman's announcement dedicated fully to Stone after three whole movies of Robotnik taking Stone for granted and Stone being ditched berated and sidelined. Finally after feeling the pain of Gerald's rejection (that 'You're no Maria' was ice cold) Ivo in his last moments alive makes sure Stone knows he reciprocates and pays tribute to Stone's love and loyalty to him, admitting that Stone was more than just a sycophant, a tool to be used and discarded, Stone was a 'syco-friend'. my HEART
That final 'I love the way you make 'em' the delivery was so heartfelt
Stone's tearful smile after saying goodbye to Robotnik. There's a sort of sad acceptance to it like finally hearing Robotnik admit that he does care about him too softens the blow of losing him and will help Stone to move on post movie. Maybe Stone after Robotnik's death with find someone that truly treats him right. A lot of people speculate that Stone will be the big bad of the next film but I don't know, I think in an interview by Lee he said that Stone just wanted to feel acknowledged by Robotnik and in the end Stone finally got that. I feel like its a good bookend for both Robotnik and Stone's characters arcs and i'd have mixed feelings if they were confirmed to appear in the next movie; while i'd love to see more of Robotnik and Stone's twisted dynamic in the next movie, I feel like it'd sort of undermine Robotnik's final moment of humanity at the end of movie 3. Then again someone has to have made and been controlling the metal sonics we saw in the post credit scene so who knows what the next movie will bring.
Dislikes:
Stone only getting like 6-7 minutes of screen time, I would have like a few more scenes with him interacting with Robotnik Gerald and other characters to flesh him out a bit more, maybe even learn more of his backstory. I felt like this was also a problem with Maria and Gerald; both needed a bit more time to flesh out their characters. It would have been cool to see more of Gerald and Maria before Maria's death for instance.
The movie steering away from the romantic subtext that was present in the second movie (the lattes with hearts, the romantic music playing in Stone's cafe and Stone photoshopping his boss into a maid outfit) in favour of a more platonic or atleast debatable dynamic between them - Stone being sad about not being Robotnik's 'best friend', Robotnik calling Stone his syco-friend and no outright explicit confirmation from either of them was kind of sad to see. Felt like there was potential to openly confirm stobotnik in a romantic if twisted relationship, especially given the two lived together for over a year in their crab mech and were clearly comfortable around eachother, but I guess maybe the producers were too nervous of backlash to do so so they went with a more dubious/platonic angle.
Robotnik immediately treating Stone worse once he connects with Gerald :( I suppose it makes sense; Ivo now has this shiny new family connection,from his selfish perspective why would he need boring old but reliable Stone but it still was sad to see Robotnik completely disregard everything Stone had done for him - staying by his side after leaving the government, doting on him and rescuing/caring for Robotnik after the latter fell from the giant mech in the second movie (not shown in the movie only storyboards but still presumably Stone was the one to rescue Robotnik). Personally i'd have preferred it if there was a bit more conflict from Robotnik's side, maybe have Gerald manipulate him into steadily distructing Stone more and more as the movie went on.
Stone not getting a scene where he snaps at Robotnik/shows a backbone. Yes he tried to to warn Robotnik of Gerald and Shadow's real plans for the world but again that was mostly for Robotnik's own wellbeing. Stone was terrified of losing him. It would have been nice to see after 3 movies of Stone being a doormat for Robotnik Stone finally erupt and stand up to Ivo.
Stone disappearing from the plot at the climax of the film AGAIN, a reoccuring theme in the trilogy lol, Stone disappears from the plot after Robotnik tells him to ready the prototype in the first movie and again in the second, though to a lesser extent, after he was knocked out in the mech. It would have been cool to see him do a little more, maybe aid Robotnik Tails and Knuckles in stopping Gerald in some way instead of merely being a bystander.
Similarly to the second movie I feel like Jimbotnik and now Gerald were a bit TOO zany at times. Like the scene at their first meeting when they both looked at the camera and broke the fourth wall made me groan and god... the Ivo vs Gerald fight was... bad and not even in a so bad its good way way more a killing the pacing and tension way. Like why why put the jim carrey selfspank scene right after Sonic and Shadow had a heart to heart on the moon. Why.
Robotnik's overuse of modern slang also made me wince a bit... didn't like it in the second movie don't like it anymore in the third. I found some of the quips funny like the trauma dumping line but most of the times I felt the jokes were pandering too much to kids and would age badly.
No scene where Wade once again awkwardly third wheels while Robotnik and Stone be weird together again :(
THE FLASHBACK SCENE BEING CUT :'( In the leaked storyboards Robotnik was going to a have a sort of 'feelings realization' moment where he presumably contemplates why he's bothering to save the Earth. A flashback was going to appear showing the scene where Stone gives Robotnik his latte after the latter returned in movie 2, Stone in his GUN disguise rescuing Robotnik after the latter was trapped under the rubble of his mech post movie 2 and a scene where a concerned looking Stone is handfeeding Robotnik soup complete with Robotnik looking depressed in a full body cast. The final storyboard picture showed a wide eyed and concerned Robotnik clearly realizing that Earth being destroyed would mean Stone was going to die as well. The flashback and Stone's life being on the line was what would have prompted Robotnik to try to save the planet. The flashback and feelings realization scene was cut for some reason from the final film :( Think I still have the leaked storyboard images somewhere on my blog but we were robbed.
Well this got longer than expected haha, hope its somewhat coherent.
#sonic movie#sonic movie 3#sonic 3#sonic the hedgehog#stobotnik#jimbotnik#agent stone#dr robotnik#dr eggman#eggman#ivo robotnik#sonic cinematic universe#gerald robotnik#my post#sonic movie 3 spoilers
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On one hand I couldn’t imagine any scenario where cannibal chef reader chose anything over alastor
But imagine they reconnect with like a friend from when they were alive and for probably the first time in their afterlife, not chase after alastor 😨
Busted~
A/N: Bet. Here you meet Jan, they're genderfluid. Using they/them pronouns for this specific fic and reader to be she/her to avoid confusion.
i imagine them all cool and wearing very fashionable clothes, being a striving designer when they were alive and all. i think that's cool. i'm sorry for inaccuracies but i didnt focus on that but rather their dynamic with the reader so pls enjoyyyy
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"(Y/n)~! I HEARD YOU WERE STAYING HERE SO I CAME OVER!~ I respect your privacy as a decent person but asserting my authority as your best friend by coming in anyway!"
A series of screams erupted from the crowd that was enjoying breakfast at a large dinner table at the front of the entrance, when someone knocked down the front door with a heavy slam making the giant chandelier swing over their heads.
You perked your head from the crowd when you heard your name being called. You were met with a person with blue hair styled into a wolf cut, having very striking features, who triumphantly poses with their hands on their waist with a proud look on his faces as he harrumphs, as if to brag he defeated the 'evil door'. They immediately spot you and rushed for a hug.
"(Y/n)! I missed you so much," they cried, "When you were reported missing, I sacrificed life and limb looking for you."
"(Y/n), respectfully, what the fuck. This is the 3rd time this week," Angel complains stabbing his food.
"Jan! How'd you even find me? I thought you said you'd live 'til you were 150," you exclaim, ignoring Angel's comment, finding Jan's appearance very surprising.
"I WOULD HAVE IF YOUR DUMBASS DIDN'T DIE!" they say whacking you over the head with a clenched fist.
You let out a pained cry holding your head as you got nagged on.
"Hi, uhm, who are you?" Charlie asks.
"The name's Jan, pronounced the way you would January. I'm (Y/n)'s best friend," they say pulling you in headlock with a smile on their face. "Anyway, I'm here to pick her up. We've got a whole day to catch up on."
Before Jan could bolt out of the door with you raised above their head. Alastor stops them in their tracks with a comical screech.
"Hi, uh, can you get out of the way.. please?" Jan tries trying to circle around him and failing when you get plucked out of their hand into his arms.
"And where do you think you're going with my dearest companion?" he asks with hostility laced in his tone. Your eyes quivered as you watched two very important people in your life glare at each other that you had to intervene.
"You're coming with me, right?" Jan pleads giving you puppy dog eyes.
"Oh please. She stays with me," Alastor answers for me making you nervous for how you torn you were. You wanted to talk to your best friend, but you couldn't disappoint Alastor.
After much deliberation and many confused noises coming from you. You finally answered, "I'd like to go with Jan, Sir Alastor. But it'll be only for a day--"
Before you could even finish your sentence, Jan pulls you with a victorious squeal and dashed out the hotel with no time to spare. Leaving behind a flabbergasted Alastor, eye twitching in annoyance at the fact that you actually left his side willingly. Of course, it would happen eventually for an occasion, but that nonetheless it annoyed him to his core.
Everyone looks at Alastor who was emanating a ferocious aura that made everyone tremble in fear. Collectively thinking of the same phrase, 'Oh shit..'
As quickly as it came, a calm washed over them. His anger becoming a mirage unsettling them. He then states, "I guess there's no harm in giving them time to reconnecting with an old friend. I'll be in my studio if you need me."
They watch as his coat sways side to side fading into the distance.
"How much you wanna bet he won't make it at the end of the day," Angel arranges with a smug smile.
"So, how's everything? Last I heard from you was that you've gone missing on TV. You were everywhere! Up until Yuta got arrested for allegedly killing you and a few other murders," they say, eating the cotton candy in their hand.
"Well, I did die cause of Yuta," their jaw drops making you answer their unspoken question, "I got eaten by him."
She looks at you jaw dropping to the floor as well as the cotton candy in her hand before composing themselves and offering me a fist bump, "That's fucking hardcore dude, respect."
"They must've just linked your killings and pinned it on him since you were already gone. Not that you left any evidence for the missing bodies tho," they say dragging you to a bar where you guys' shared drinks.
First shot in you already got tipsy though, it makes Jan laugh. "Hah! Even in hell your alcohol tolerance is still shit!" they laugh at you manically holding their stomach.
You pout slowly losing your rationality and spilled on Jan, "Do you think I'm annoying?"
Jan stops laughing and pulls on a serious face. "No? What makes you say that?" they ask looking directly at you.
"I don't know. Sometimes I'm a bit too much on Sir Alastor. I'm starting to think he dislikes me instead," you continue pouting while you spilled your grievances.
"I don't think you're too much, babe. That's just how you show your affection. Any fucking guy is lucky to have your love," Jan answers truthfully downing their drink, "Why? You like this Alastor guy?"
You moped and sat your cheek on the counter getting all red from the shots you've taken and nodded at them "They're the first one to not be disgusted at me," you explain rolling the glass at your fingertips.
"He likes my cooking. He tells me that he appreciates what I do for him. He even took me out for a birthday dinner just the two of us!" you cried a river of tears falling down on the counter while Jan wordlessly rubs your back, comforting you.
"Sounds like this guy is into you, babe," Jan admits with a smug smile happy that you found someone that actually likes you for who you are.
"You think so?"
"Positive," they smile giving you a thumbs up, "Have I ever been wrong?"
"No..."
"Damn straight! Now let's get shit-faced!!"
Several hours later, we find Alastor in his seat a shadow covering his face absolutely fuming. He abruptly stands up and storms after you. He finds you both at a bar, you are slumping on the counter surrounded by a dozen shot glasses.
"Oh, it's you. Alastor guy," Jan says acknowledging Alastor, red faced from the alcohol. "You gonna take her now? She's out cold probably won't even remember it tomorrow."
Alastor huffs at them while carefully pulling you into his arms. Jan notices the odd gentleness he had with you and smirks. "You're a good guy, Al. Good to know you like her back."
He glares at Jan who figured out his affection for you, as much as he wants to butt heads with them, he respected your friends as he doesn't know much about your life, and he doesn't want you to dislike him despite his rough actions.
"She went off about how you were a perfect gentleman, how much she loves you and a lot more other stuff. You better take good care of her or I'm dragging her ass back to my side," Jan half-heartedly threatened, before raising their right hand and made a serene face and says, "You have my blessing."
He raises his brow while giving them the fattest side eye before teleporting you back to the hotel where Angel and Husk's eyes trailed after your figure in the overlord's arms. With a groan and a roll of his eyes Husk gives Angel a 20 dollar bill.
"Sir Alastor??~ Hello, hehe. Bite me~"
"Ask politely."
"Bite me pretty please with a strawberry on top~"
TAGLIST:
@bonnie-02, @marxo5, @whaatttlaufey, @froggybich
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin lucifer#hazbin alastor#hazbin angel dust#hazbin charlie#hazbin husk#hazbin vaggie#alastor x reader#alastor#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor x oc#alastor the radio demon#radio demon#cannibal chef reader#harleehazbinfic
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SEÑORITA: Chapter 9**
pairing: Javier Peña x Murphy!f!reader
summary: you get Javier to open up about his life in Colombia. meanwhile, when Steve invites the whole lot of you to brunch, it becomes tough to keep your relationship a secret, especially when Javier's confession burns on the tip of his tongue.
word count: 7k
series warnings: reluctant friends to lovers, lots of playful banter, mutual pining, slow burn, secret relationship, filthy smut; lots of flirting, love confessions, mirror sex, cunnilingus & fingering, some dry humping , cockwarming, lil bit of praise kink & gentle dom!Javi.
A/N: so hiiii yes I am not dead, I am just not really posting anymore but I will see this story through. idk if this is as good as I'd hoped, but I do hope you enjoy it nonetheless 💕
AGELESS/EMPTY BLOGS & MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!
series masterlist | AO3
There’s loud screams all around him. Smoke, screams, and the unmistakable scent of death and despair, all around him.
Someone’s screaming for him. Saying his name on a loop. Javier, Javier, Javier. Followed by Javi. Then a toe-curling help me and please, and then—silence.
A silence so loud his ears are ringing and pouring blood.
Except when he looks around him, there’s blood everywhere.
Blood, mass destruction, and an impending sense of doom that no matter how far he runs, no matter what lies he tells, it never leaves him. It is then, in that very second as he’s looking down at the bloodied and bruised face of a woman he once thought he could be with and save, Javier realizes that sense of doom will never leave him. He will remain forever locked in its harsh and cold grip, forever followed by the inevitable shame and guilt, doomed to drown in them.
“I’m sorry,” he mutters. “’m sorry—I’m—I couldn’t—“
“Javi. Hey. It’s okay. Can you hear me? Javi. It’s me.”
His name on a loop, pronounced so carefully and sincerely, so rich with care and an almost soul-crushing sweetness, awakens him at long last. He’s disoriented as he looks around, his temples and forehead dripping with sweat. There’s a hand gently resting on his chest, steadying his heartbeat, and it’s then that Javier’s eyes come into focus and they see your face. And then slowly the realization that he’s no longer in Colombia, no longer surrounded by pain, comes into focus as well, and that he’s in his bed, next to the most wonderful woman he’s ever known.
“Are you alright?” you ask, gently rubbing his chest through the t-shirt.
“Yeah. I’m definitely better now.”
He cracks a reassuring smile and so do you.
“Nightmare?” you ask next.
Javier nods, rather hesitantly. “I was back in Colombia. In Bogota.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Upon noticing the hesitation on his face, you’re quick to add, “It’s okay if you don’t want to though. I don’t have to know everything about your past.”
Something about that feels oddly endearing; Javier hasn’t met anyone who has been as kind and understanding as you and for every genuine word you throw at him, for every gentle caress of his hand or his cheek, he feels his chest impossibly lighter, as if all the pain he has been carrying with him for the past few years is beginning to wear off at long last.
Though his tongue aches for verbal release, Javier isn’t certain that he wants to burden you with the horrors he had witnessed and done in Colombia. You are far too tame to handle such harsh realities, even if you clearly expect the truth and nothing but it.
“I did things I’m not proud of,” he lets out in a coarser than expected voice. “Terrible things. Either for information or out of… helplessness or desperation.”
You don’t say anything; you adjust your position so that you face him clearer, even in the darkness, and let him continue.
“I’m no saint, by no means. I guess sometimes I thought my actions were justified because the end result would be good. But it rarely ever was.”
And before he knows it, Javier is telling you the chapter of his life which he deemed closed some time ago, from start to finish: he tells you about him and Steve and how they worked together; he tells you about working with the most gruesome group in all of Colombia in order to get to Pablo Escobar; he tells you about Helena and how he cared about her and how he got her traumatized simply because he pushed her too much for information; he tells you of all the people he threatened, shot, of all the plans he made and failed, how he got the so-called promotion in Cali and how it meant that Steve was the one who ended Escobar eventually. By the end of it, it’s nearly morning and you’re cuddled at his chest, listening to him breathe and caressing his cheek.
“I appreciate you opening up about this,” you murmur. “I know it can’t possibly be easy.”
“It is. It feels easier with you.”
You smile, chastely kissing his lips. Javier’s chest rises and falls with each additional shaky breath he takes as he forces his mind to collaborate with his mouth in order to get out those pesky three words that have been pressing on his conscience for weeks now. Yet the way you kiss him tenderly and sweetly, as if to reassure him that he’s safe and sound from any harm in this world, it shuts him up real good.
His mother once told him that when he’ll meet someone special, he’ll know it and he’ll know just what to say and when. He was still a kid at the time and he dismissed his mother’s words, but now he feels them to be truer than ever.
“So if we were in Colombia,” you say suddenly as a smirk graces your lips, “would I be one of your girls?”
Javier turns to you, faintly amused. He cocks an eyebrow at you, his interest visibly peaked.
“What?”
“Would I be one of many girls that fall at Javier Peña’s feet? One of the lucky ones who get to go to bed with him?”
Something aches inside Javier as you pose that question. It’s a playful one and while you have no ill intentions behind it, it dawns on Javier that the idea repulses him on a certain level. The idea of you being just another pretty face to add to that seemingly endless list of conquests, another forgettable name on there… he doesn’t want that.
Especially not when the reality could not be more farther from the truth.
“No,” he responds, shifting closer to you and removing a strand of hair from your face. “No, absolutely not.”
You smile, somewhat confused. “Why not?”
“Because you’re—better. You’re—you’re everything, you—“
His heart starts pounding, his throat feels beyond dry and it feels as if there is a huge ball of fire in his chest, waiting to burst at the slightest movement.
“I—what?”
Tell her. Tell her now.
Tell her you fucking coward!
“We should get some rest,” Javier mutters, stroking your hair and coaxing you into his arms so that you fall asleep as soon as possible. Once you do, he finally exhales, still burdened and haunted, but much more secure in his decision to finally come clean to you tomorrow, no matter what.
Except that when tomorrow comes, Javier receives an unexpected invitation.
“You free in about two hours?” Steve’s voice asks through the phone, and Javier gulps out of instinct.
“Yeah, think so. Why?”
“How would you feel about having brunch with me and Connie?”
He falters, and it’s as if Steve can sense the hesitation on his part because he’s quick to add, “Hopefully my sister’s gonna be there too. Also Sylvie and her boyfriend Zack, they’re coming too. You know, my sister’s friends.”
“Right, yeah, I think she mentioned them at some point.”
“Yeah. I thought a nice friendly meal would do us all good. What do you say?”
Javier meets your face from the corner of his eye and notices the question written all over it. He shakes his head briefly, a little “I’ll handle this for us” sign, and resumes his conversation with Steve.
“Sounds nice, I’m in,” he tells Steve.
“Great. Just gotta call my sister now. Or hope to get in touch with her at least.”
“Just call her, I’m sure it’s gonna be fine.”
The moment he hangs up, he stares at you with the same guilty face he’s been having whenever Steve’s been around lately.
“You need to go to your apartment,” he tells you in a grim voice.
You frown. “Are you kicking me out?”
Javier makes a face. “No, of course not. But you need to go to your apartment because your brother’s gonna call you and you need to answer the phone.”
“I could be sleeping in. It’s Sunday, after all. I could’ve been out last night. Hell, I could’ve been with somebody. Maybe I was with Dean and we—“
“Okay, stop.”
You try not to smile seeing the bothered look on Javier’s face. Instead, you inch closer to him and wrap your arms around his neck.
“Aw, honey, are you jealous of Dean?” you peck his lips.
“I think we’ve already established that I was. But not anymore. I’ve got you, and he can go suck a lemon for all I care.”
You scoff, kissing him again, utterly enjoying the sensation of Javier simply melting into your arms, into the kiss you share.
“You really should stop with this because if you don’t, we’re gonna be stuck in here for the rest of the day, spent and sweaty,” Javier warns, to which you cock an eyebrow at him.
“Okay, so what did my brother want?”
“He invited us to brunch.”
“Us?”
“Well, me. And he should be calling you any moment, so if you could go to your apartment and answer the phone, I’d really appreciate that.”
“But I could be—“
“Please. For me?”
You roll your eyes, sighing. “Fine. You’re lucky I’m sweet on you.”
Javier presses a kiss to your cheek, stroking your hand.
“But we need to set up some ground rules for this brunch,” he tells you sternly.
“Rules? For what?”
“We said we’re not gonna tell Steve about us until we’re ready, and we’re not really there yet, so no sitting together, no touching, no looking at each other unless absolutely necessary.”
“Don’t you think that makes it more suspicious?”
“Hopefully not.”
You chuckle. “For someone who used to be a bad boy, you sure like setting down rules.”
“I’m just saying—okay, just—just go upstairs.”
“Ooh, yes, sir.”
He knows you’re joking; he knows you’re teasing him, especially in that falsely impressed and sultry tone of voice, and yet a part of him still twitches at the thought of you being so willing, so malleable and needy for him.
It’s a thought that will never leave his mind—or his body.
The little bistro Steve chose—aka claims, because everyone knows Connie is the one who actually picked it—for the brunch is quite cozy: floral arrangements adorn the outside windows, little lights hang from the walls on the inside, and plenty of people buzzing and chatting, completely immersed in their conversations.
If he were honest, Javier preferred if the two of you showed up at this brunch separately—although in hindsight, that would probably raise more questions instead of burying them for good. But he still has a knot in his throat even when you assure him that nobody’s going to bat an eyelash and that they will all think you coming together here was nothing more but an act of convenience.
“I’m telling you, it’s fine,” you sneakily squeeze Javier’s hand. “Could you at least try to look less constipated? Just—you know, for at least an hour or two.”
Javier frowns at you, taking a deep breath and taking one last, long look at you, as if he’s trying to memorize every single detail about you. You crack a smile.
“It’s going to be fine,” you reassure him. “You care far more about Steven’s opinion than I do. I don’t care if he finds out.”
“I kind of do.”
“I know you do. And it’s so sweet. But so what if he finds out? I mean… what’s he gonna uncover? That his little sister is in the healthiest and best relationship she’s ever had?”
“With his friend and partner whom he particularly asked not to fool around with his little sister.”
“Javi, we’re not just fooling around.” After a pause, you continue somewhat concerned. “Are we?”
“No, absolutely not.”
“Then you shouldn’t worry this much.”
It’s quite astounding how fast you’re capable of calming Javier down with minimal effort. But it works, and when the two of you enter the place and take your seats at the table, greeted by the rest of the party, Javier breathes a little easier. He avoids Steve’s eyes as he shakes hands with Zach and Sylvie, guilt weighing on his conscience like the heaviest boulder. He tries his best in remembering your words that this isn’t about Steve, it’s about the two of you and your newfound happiness, but alas, he remains just a little bit stiff throughout brunch as conversation starts flowing between all of you.
On the brighter side, Javier smiles to himself seeing you and Steve engaged in conversation, laughing with each other. You’re sitting side by side to your brother, which means Javier is right in front of you and gets to notice the two of you mending your relationship.
Then he thinks again of how hopelessly in love he feels with you, how he has been for the past several weeks, if not more, and how it’s all happening behind Steve’s back. Maybe you were right, though; maybe it wouldn’t be so bad for Steve to find out at last. He’d find out that his little sister is happy, and that his best friend is content, at peace.
Would that be so bad?
And then he feels your foot rubbing against his, sneaking its way up, just in the slightest; he inhales a sharp breath, giving you a death stare, and he gets his answer.
Maybe it would be so bad.
“I hear you finished writing your book?” Sylvie asks you, redirecting Javier’s attention to the subject matter.
“I did,” you proudly say. “I need to do the final editing, run it by someone, but I’m pretty confident it’ll be out by next year. At least that’s the hope.”
“That’s so damn cool,” Zach says in between mouthfuls.
“Truly amazing,” Connie adds.
“I’m so proud of you.”
Everyone turns to look at Steve, who’s got the brightest smile on his face and his glass raised up. They all follow suit with the gesture, toasting your accomplishment as you stare at your big brother.
“Really, I am,” Steve goes on. “I’ve always been. Always thought you’re amazing. Much cooler than me.”
“By miles.”
The table laughs.
“But it dawned on me that I never really told you this. So… I want you to know that I am very proud of you, every day. And I love you.”
“Thank you. And I love you too.”
“Here, here!”
The conversation begins to flow easily afterwards: Connie shares Olivia’s latest endeavors and how she started walking; Zach and Sylvie talk about their relationship and how it is to live together, to which you make a tasteful joke about her pretending to still live with you as well and how you and Zach basically share Sylvie; then Steve talks about work and how he enjoys it, being similar and yet different than what he used to do in Colombia. Javier remains silent during this portion, sipping on his black coffee and pretending not to feel your leg sliding up his.
“What about you, Javier?” Sylvie asks.
“What about me what?”
“How do you like it at the precinct?”
“It’s okay.”
You eye him briefly, affectionately rubbing your leg on his shin, concealing a smile as you see him squirm in his seat.
“Javi’s having a bit of a tough time adjusting,” Steve intervenes.
“It’s police work. It’s what I know, and it’s what I do.”
“It’s what gives you nightmares.”
Everyone at the table turns towards you, the same surprised look on all of their faces. You shrug, ignoring Javier’s deadly stare.
“And you know this how?” Steve asks reticently.
“By talking. By asking and by actually getting to know people, Steven.”
“Let’s move on, shall we?” Javier suggests.
“What do you mean?” Steve resumes, focusing solely on you. “I know people, I talk to them.”
You take a deep breath, maintaining a neutral tone even if your pulse increases rapidly.
“You refer to Javier as your best friend, but besides work, how much do you really talk to each other?”
“We talk.”
“Sometimes too much if you ask me,” Javier adds.
“Point is, he is my best friend.”
“Really? Did you know that he has night terrors? Not nightmares, terrors. And not every night, but he has ‘em. He mumbles and groans in his sleep, sometimes cries or even screams. He apologizes over and over to dead people, to you and to Connie.”
“Oh, Javi…” Connie mumbles.
“Do you know how I know this?”
There’s a lightbulb moment happening inside Steve’s head, and it is perfectly legible on his face as he stares at you, then at Javier, who gulps. Steve says your name, still processing, and it is only then that Javier stands up abruptly, his eyes shooting right at you.
“Can I talk to you for a minute? All the way over there?”
You raise your eyebrows, quite surprised, but nod and follow Javier all the way to the buffet table. You notice the little crease between his brows, the way he purses his lips and you can tell something’s making him uncomfortable. Suddenly the thought makes you feel guilty.
“Javi, I’m sorry if I crossed a line—“
“You thought at brunch would be a good idea to rub your leg against me? With your friends and brother right next to you?”
You furrow your brows, even more taken aback. “Okay, not where I thought this conversation was headed,” you confess.
“Tell me.”
As much as you’d like to deny it or pretend like it doesn’t affect you, Javier’s demeanor is getting through to you in ways you wouldn’t have thought possible; the way he’s being so adamant about his request, his voice low and husky—
“I thought it would be fun, yes,” you shamelessly admit.
“You gotta stop it because otherwise I might excuse us again and fuck you in that bathroom.”
Speechless, you stare at him, mouth ajar and heart pounding in your ears. You find yourself incapable of saying anything for the next few seconds, and even more shocking, you find yourself seriously debating Javier’s words.
“Don’t tell me you’re actually thinking about it,” he says.
“Don’t tell me you’re not,” you chuckle.
Javier huffs, frustrated to the point of taking his own words into consideration.
Except he is trying really hard not to be that kind of man and be more respectful and wary.
“Gotta be honest, I thought you were gonna be upset about me saying you have nightmares,” you mutter.
“No, I’m upset because you were rubbing up against me with your brother right next to you, and I can’t keep going like this. So either you tell him about us, or I do.”
You stare at him incredulously. “Wait, seriously? You wanna tell him?”
“I need a clear conscience. And I really need it so next time I fuck you, I won’t feel so guilty.”
You chuckle, stroking his arm. You’re fully aware that the gesture hasn’t gone unnoticed by the four people who are most likely still staring at you two, but all of a sudden, you no longer care. Javier is right; just as he doesn’t want to deny or hide it anymore, neither do you.
So when you return to the table, the perfect comeback is hatched from your brain.
“Sorry about that,” you smile, turning straight to Steven.
“What’s going on?”
“As I was saying, do you know how I know all of those things about Javier?”
“Don’t say it.”
“I’ve been spending the nights at his place. Every night for like three months now.”
Connie and Sylvie are the only ones smiling, except the latter is sipping from her cup of coffee with utmost interest.
“Three months?” Steven repeats. “So you chose to sleep with my best friend to what? To prove a point, to—to laugh in my face?”
“Neither. Actually, it did start as a way to get back at you. But as it turns out, he’s great in the sack.”
“As advertised,” Javier adds.
“And you wanted to skip brunch today,” Sylvie whispers to Zach, who’s watching the exchange as speechless as Connie.
“Don’t—“Steve shakes his head.
“Oh yeah, he’s fantastic. Knows his way around a woman’s body better than she knows it. I’m talking about waves and waves of endless pleasure.”
“I think I’m gonna throw up.”
“Actually, I think I might too. We haven’t really been careful, you know? It’s been a lot of sweaty, rough and yet so passionate—“
“Okay, stop! Why are you being like this? Both of you!”
You exchange a glare with Javier, both of you smiling at each other.
“Like what? Wild, unhinged?”
“Kind of, yes!”
“The way you’ve been treating me since I was 15? Which I haven’t been in years, by the way.”
“Please tell me you were using some form of birth control though.”
“Ew, shut up! Would you calm down already? We’re both responsible adults, we know what to do. Besides, we’re not just sleeping together. We’re going on dates and spending time together and… we like each other.”
“We’re not just fooling around,” Javier adds, unable to look away from you. “I’m in love with her.”
You stare back at him, ignoring Connie’s soft oh my God in your vicinity, even Sylvie’s I fuckin’ knew it towards Zach.
“Javi, it’s okay, you don’t have to—“
“I love her, Steve. And I did keep my promise to not fool around with her. What I can do is promise to keep her safe and treat her with respect and care.”
It dawns on you that this is the first time you’ve heard Javier say those words, and realizing he also hasn’t said them since his last real relationship. It’s a huge milestone in both your lives, and the fact that Javier chose this moment to confess makes you realize how much he must care about you.
“It’s true,” you add. “I—I love him too. I have for quite some time.”
“I fuckin’ told you,” Sylvie smiles. “I told you, and I knew sooner or later—“
“Not now, Syl.”
“Right, sorry. Continue.”
“Honey?” Connie presses her hand to Steve’s shoulder. “Don’t you wanna say something to them?”
“I’m really sorry, guys. I never wanted to… to treat you this way, to push you even further, sis. I guess I was just afraid that what Colombia did to me and Javier would be too much for you to handle. I know Connie got overwhelmed at some point. Rightfully so. But after all, I had her to come home to. Javier was… alone, and burying his problems in alcohol, cigarettes and random women. Relationships were out of question for him, and I saw what Colombia did to him overall, what all of that did to him. I didn’t want any of that for you. I obviously want you both to be happy, that’s all I’ve ever wanted. And I see you guys now being so happy with each other… it makes me happy.”
“We’re sorry we didn’t tell you earlier,” Javier says. “I guess we needed some time to figure things out ourselves.”
“Doesn’t matter now. Point is, I know my sister, she’s an amazing woman, and I—I missed the angle where that might be something good for Javier. Which it clearly is. And clearly he was full of shit when he said you’re not his type.”
“Just out of curiosity,” you intervene, “what exactly is Javier’s type?”
“The usual sexy, sultry woman.”
You raise your brows, to which Steve panics. “Not that you’re not! I mean, not that I think you as my sister are sexy… okay, this is weird, let’s move on.”
“Yeah, let’s.”
“I meant, you’re more the next door girl kind of woman, I suppose, and Javier usually went for the ‘right in your face sexy’ kind of a woman.”
“Relax, I know. I’m just teasing you.”
“Yeah, it’s what you do best.”
Everyone laughs, with Connie affectionately rubbing Steve’s arm.
“But listen, as glad as I am that we are talking about this and being open and mature about it, please do be safe, okay?” Steve says, and you make a face. “Also I know this goes without saying, probably—hopefully—but please don’t have a baby just to spite me.”
“Steven—“
“Please, I’ve learned my lesson, I swear. I promise I’ll be good! I’ll stay out of your relationship, just don’t—“
“Steven!”
“I’m not totally ready to be an uncle. I need to mentally prepare myself for a baby that’s half Murphy, half Peña.”
You roll your eyes. “Would you relax? We are not there yet. We may never be there. I don’t know. I don’t know what the future holds for us, but for now we’re good the way we are. Plus he’s teaching me Spanish too.”
“Oh, that’s nice.”
“But don’t worry, we only do it when I get a full sentence right.”
Seeing the scandalized look on Steve’s face, you burst into laughter, and the rest follow suit.
“I’m kidding! Oh my God, it’s so fun messing with you.”
“Something is seriously wrong with you.”
You can’t help but share the laughter with the rest of the company, never quite managing to capture Javier’s eyes in your direction, not even on the way home. It only hits you the weight of the words that had been hastily, yet calculatedly, been spilled at the brunch table among friends and family once you get the inside of his apartment. You look around, finally allowing the day’s events to hit you, and then you turn to look at Javier, a warm smile gracing your face.
He confessed to everyone present that he loved you, standing up to your overly protective older brother.
“What’s going on?” Javier asks.
It somehow still surprises you that he’s able to capture the concern on your face, even when it’s not there. You’re not concerned this time around. Quite the opposite; you’ve never felt more at ease and more impressed by a partner. Granted, not that you had many serious relationships in the past, but this right now with Javier, it has so much potential to be something grand that it astounds you.
“About what you said before,” you start, your heart thrumming in your ears. “At brunch.”
Then it hits Javier as well. He inhales deeply, steadying himself.
“Right. So here’s the thing,” he clears his throat. “I’ve only ever said those words once before, and as we know, it didn’t end very well. Okay, in all fairness, it wasn’t paradise city from the beginning, it was more of a masked—that’s not the point. Anyway—“
You conceal a chuckle, staring at him with anticipation and a warmth that exceeds any expectation.
“I’ve only said those words once,” he resumes, “and I did mean it at the time. But I wasn’t really… in love when I said them. It didn’t feel like it should. But now, I think for the first time in my life, I feel those words the way they should feel. I thought I’m the kind of guy who doesn’t do relationships because I suck at them and there was never any time back in Colombia but… I think I just needed to find my match.”
You take his hand into yours. “Javi…”
“I’m serious. I’ve never met anyone so witty and funny, so—so badass. Frankly you could probably kick my ass and I’d be hella turned on.”
You don’t stifle the hearty laugh that escapes your mouth this time, and it triggers the same reaction out of Javier.
“The point I’m trying to make is… I meant what I said. I didn’t just say it to shut Steve up. I—I do love you. The best that I can, which I don’t think is near enough to what you deserve, but… I’m trying to do better, to—“
You cup his cheeks, kissing him tenderly. Javier blinks surprised at you, and his flustered face with his big brown eyes is so sweet it weakens your knees.
“You’re doing just fine, Javi,” you reassure him. “Are you kidding me? You’re so attentive and sweet and—and I love you too.”
Javier blinks in surprise again. Somehow it slipped right by him that you could reciprocate his feelings, hence why he’s rendered speechless for several seconds.
“What uh—I mean… you do?” he finally asks.
“I do. I love you. I should’ve said it sooner, I think, after you turned my story into a book. That’s… kind of when I knew. I guess I chickened out.”
“You chickened out? Why?”
You sigh. “Because… I never said the words before.”
“Wait, you never said ‘I love you’ to someone?”
You shake your head, slightly shuddering. “Well, you know my dating history and patterns, so none of those boys stuck around long enough for me to actually develop real feelings. And there was never any real connection between us. All we really had—“
“Ah, okay, I can—I can visualize what you had.”
“Aw, honey, are you jealous?”
“No. Just… not really a fan of picturing you have sweaty sex with some douchebag.”
“How about if I have some sweaty sex with a very good man?”
Though his interest visibly peaked, Javier still gulps at the notion of being referred to as “a very good man”. It’s the lie he’s told himself countless times back in Medellin and Cali and Bogota, and the same lie he operated under with the hope of excusing his horrid choices. But to hear now as something factual, something that someone as wonderful as you actually believes in…
“You could,” he finally says, stepping closer to you.
His hands roam around your waist, teasing from the small of your back; shivers run down your spine, prickling your skin.
“Is this how you were with the women back then?” you dare ask.
“Why the sudden interest?”
You shrug. “Not sudden. I’m a writer. Everyone has the potential to be an interesting character. Besides, I find the Javier stories fascinating.”
“That so?”
“Mhm.”
“Well, that Javier isn’t really around. All he was good for was some fast and rough outlet for release and… not much more.”
“So I take it that dominant, needy Javier is gone?”
He raises his brows, chuckling at the way you’re sneakily handling him. A part of him still fears this power you hold over him, but a bigger part of him is thrilled even by the still of your hand, let alone the way you’re capable of handling him.
He’s never had that, he realizes; he’s never had a woman meet him right where he’s at, handle him like a pro and then some more, and he enjoys it far more than he would’ve expected.
“I meant gone as in… gone on a vacation, not dead.”
You smile, teasingly playing with the hem of his shirt.
“That what you need now?” Javier teases.
“I want whatever you’re comfortable with giving me.”
That’s what ultimately sets him off. So when he finally kisses you, it’s rugged, needy and asserting dominance, but there’s also something very tender in the way Javier is holding you, pulling you into his body. Javier’s sole focus right now is exposing more of you to him, feeling you as close as humanly possible; therefore, he doesn’t tell you just how affected he is by your choice of words. He doesn’t tell you that this is the weakest, yet strongest he’s ever felt. If someone were to ask him how he feels, he’d easily reply “disgustingly happy”, words which he never used before.
He doesn’t tell you any of this; he lets actions speak louder. Calloused fingers, accustomed to manhandling and roughhousing, caress and cup your ass. With each passing second, the kiss you share deepens further, his pulse quickens and his jeans become more and more constricted. Never mind that it’s the middle of the day, in broad daylight; Javier wants—needs—to marvel at every inch of you, exactly as it is.
“Whatever you want from me,” he tells you through a shuddering breath as he slowly undresses you, “it’s yours. Anything.”
Javier surprises himself at how malleable he finds himself to be, caught under your spell, but he does not care one bit. When you look into his eyes and see his blown out pupils, you know he means it. You feel his words to be true.
You smile as you close your eyes and pull him in for another hasty kiss, stumbling your way to the bed. Javier strips you slowly, stealing kisses down your body while a breath catches in your throat. The sun shines right through the big windows on this crisp fall day, so there’s nothing to hide. It’s only when Javier’s hands finally pull down your panties and expose you to him that you notice you’re facing the mirror hanging from the wall of his bedroom. You shiver and on cue, Javier’s hungry eyes look up to meet yours. He smirks—because of course he does, son of a bitch.
“It’s a great view, isn’t it?” he murmurs, tentatively licking a stripe up your pussy.
His eyes don’t leave you when you sneak another glance at the mirror: it’s not huge, but big enough to fit your naked body and Javier’s head right between your legs. No good words cross your mind, even if your mind is in overdrive, begging your mouth to release some form of verbal speech. Your knees buckle and your heart beats rapidly when Javier takes his first taste. It feels like the first time he’s ever done this, though it’s really old news by this point. Recently you thought Javier’s existence is limited to one place and one place alone, and that is in between your legs, based on how much he loves spending time down there—whether he’s snug inside you or eating you out.
“Watch how gorgeous you are when you come on my tongue,” you hear Javier’s voice, lustful and dark.
“Presumptuous, aren’t we?”
You laugh a little, but it quickly fades when you feel two digits moving slowly in and out of you, a tongue collecting the slick gathered in your most sensitive spot. His nose nudges your clit, his whole mouth is seemingly buried in your pussy, and all you can do is moan helplessly, let one of your hands grab a handful of his hair and keep your eyes locked on the way your body curves and aches at his mercy. God, he’s so needy, so eager to please you and to give you orgasms; almost like this is his purpose in this world.
“Does it feel good?” you hear his husky voice.
His fingers feel like they’re splitting you open while you nearly fall apart in his mouth, and at the same time it’s not enough. It drives you insane.
You nod frantically, locked in the same trance of watching yourself getting ate out by Javier.
“With words, señorita.”
Oh fuck. You hadn’t expected that, certainly not the reaction it triggers out of you.
“Yes,” you exhale. “It feels so, so good, Javi.”
“Good. Touch yourself.”
Though your mind is in a haze, you’re able to follow his instruction. Your hand bolts to your clit, rubbing in circling motions. That, paired with his fingers pumping in and out of you and his mouth like a hot furnace devouring your pussy, it doesn’t take that much longer to get you to where you desperately need. Seeing you like this, being able to make you feel this way, it’s all getting to Javier too; he’s gotten so hard by this point it’s borderline masochistic how much pain he’s voluntarily taking in, so he unconsciously starts to rub against the edge of the bed. The friction is so good, but nowhere near enough. It’ll have to do for now, he thinks. He needs to get you off first.
A moan is harshly ripped from the back of your throat, your legs jerk and nearly trap Javier between them as pleasure jolts throughout your body. It’s electric, overwhelming, and simply unmatched. It’s too much all at once, to look in the mirror and see how painfully needy you are for this man, how beautifully fucked out you look in at this very moment. You notice his hips, desperately humping the bed, unbeknownst even to himself.
Javier pulls out his fingers, only his tongue remaining on your overly sensitive area, the strokes of it now gentler. You tug on his hair to make him attentive, and when he looks up, you see his face contorted in a mixture of delight, pleasure and neediness. And just like that, your body aches again, only this time for something more.
“Ah fuck,” Javier groans in his fast attempt to dispose of his clothes. “Didn’t notice I was—“
He sighs right as you smile, taking in the sight of a naked Javier, all in broad daylight for you to savor. He’s so hard now it almost pains you, so when you make a motion to get to him and stroke him, Javier nearly swats your hand away.
“Why not?” you ask with a pout.
“Because it’s gonna be a fucking miracle if I last more than a few seconds and I wanna be inside you when we come.”
You raise your brows. “We?”
“What did I tell you in the beginning that you’ll always have from me?”
“At least two orgasms.”
“I live up to my words.”
He’s wrapped the condom around his cock, now crawling in between your legs, the place he has claimed as his own and by far the most incredible place he’s ever resided in. He’s done this plenty of times before now, it’s nothing new; and yet, this very moment which reeks of anticipation and desire, this single moment in time when his hand is curled around his cock, guiding himself to your already soaked entrance, Javier wishes he could freeze it, keep it to himself forever.
When he slides right at home, deep inside you, you both moan in tandem. And it is the most damnable, beguiling and intoxicating sensation he’s ever known.
Probably because you’re not just another girl passing through his life and his bed. You’re not another random face or a number to the list of women he’s been with.
You’re the woman he loves, the woman he’d take a bullet for if he had to, the woman he’d move mountains for.
“Javi?”
You have this ability to bring him back with his feet to the ground whenever he tends to wander off, and Javier is nothing if not grateful for it, particularly now.
“Can you move? Please?” you plead and it’s so sweet he could come just from that.
Javier chuckles, the sound resembling that of a madman—and he supposes he is one, in a sense.
“Keep lookin’,” he instructs, a little bit of his Texan roots slipping in his tone as he starts to roll his hips. “Want you to watch how good you take me. How—beautiful you are when you take me.”
The grip you have over his shoulders tightens as his hips pick up a moderate pace, pounding into you with a mixture of greed and love. The more he sinks into you, whispering sweet nothings and giving the occasional order, the more you feel pressure building inside your belly. You do as he says, watching your body writhing beneath his in the mirror, and you shudder. His back covers a lot of the frame, so you mostly notice him from behind, pounding into you, and your nearly limp body underneath, taking him as he is giving himself to you.
The sensation of having him atop of you is stellar, something almost like it was meant for you and you alone; Javier’s stealing the occasional kiss from you, his hips more erratic with each additional thrust and his mouth whispering that he’s so close, so fucking close.
“D’you see?” he manages to get out through a wicked smile. “See how—how fuckin’ good you look hmm?”
“Yes—yes, I see it—“
“Mhm—good girl. My good fuckin’ girl.”
Javier loses any train of thought, be it rational or not, and when his orgasm finally hits, it’s all too much and too sudden, and when he can’t stop cussing or thrusting furiously into you, you cup his cheeks and tell him a simple “I love you”.
And he lets go, almost violently.
He’s struggling to catch his breath when he feels you spasming around him, and there’s pride to be felt even when he’s dumbfounded that you came almost at the same time.
“I’m sorry,” he says, and you make a face at him trying to regulate his breaths. “I was kinda hoping… I’d last longer.”
You kiss him sweetly, gently, still feeling him ache inside of you. “It’s the sexiest thing,” you murmur.
“Having the endurance of a teenage boy?”
“No, the idea that someone needs you this desperately they can’t hold themselves in one piece. I love that. And I love you.”
Javier pecks your lips. “I don’t think I’ll get used to you saying that.”
“You should.”
“I love you too.”
You stay snugged up like that for who knows how long, while the sun rays beam down on your naked bodies. And then it starts to get dark, and you’re on Javier’s lap, slowly riding him and kissing him, aiming for nothing in particular but intimacy.
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tags: @pedrostories @psychedelic-ink @milkymoon2483 @ifall4dilfs @casa-boiardi @fallenkitten @jenispunk
#Javier Peña#Javier Peña x reader#Javier Peña x you#Javier Peña x y/n#Javier Peña x f!reader#Javier Peña x female reader#Javier Peña fanfiction#Javier Peña fic#Javier Peña smut#javier pena#javier pena x reader#javier pena x you#javier pena x y/n#javier pena x f!reader#javier pena x female reader#javier pena fanfiction#javier pena fic#javier pena smut#narcos fanfiction#narcos fic#javier pena narcos#narcos smut#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal fic#pedro pascal smut#señorita series
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Protect The Child - The Child
This is the final part of a series in which I cover the playbooks of Protect The Child, my Forged-in-the-Dark game about monster baby-sitters (alpha playtest). This week, we're looking at a unique, communal playbook - The Child.
This is your Crew playbook in Protect the Child. Your Child is not played by the players, but by the Game Master. They are the reason all of you are working together, and have unique powers that make them a target, as well as a spectrum of emotions that will push your characters to react.
Unlike Blades in the Dark, you alter pieces of this single playbook, rather than choosing from a list. Most of these pieces are tied to the Child's age.
Your Child will be somewhere between a Newborn and a Teenager in age range. Right now, each age range opens up new special powers, pips in the Child's stats, and broadens the Child's emotional spectrum. Choosing a specific age also defines what Milestones the Child may have already achieved, and which Milestones they haven't met yet. These Milestones are a mark of your Child's progress - and therefore, also the progress of your group.
You can choose to start at whichever age you like - starting with a Baby strictly reduces number of abilities available to the kid at game start, but sets them up for a much more pronounced growth arc, over a long campaign. Starting with a Teenager opens up a lot of abilities for the kid, but reduces the amount of growth that your characters will witness; the Teenager might already have habits they've formed, or talents they've figured out how to use.
The Child is probably the most untested part of this game. How their emotions prompt the characters to act, and how their XP interacts with their growth options is something I'm eager to test, and this means that much of this playbook may change in the future. I'm really looking forward to playing around with The Child, and I'm hoping that to some extent, this playbook bears some resemblance to the growing-up process.
If you'd like to take The Child for a whirl, you can pick up Protect the Child while it's in free play-test and set up a game with your friends! I'd love to hear feedback about how The Child played for you.
If you'd like to see the character playbooks for Protect the Child, I'm linking to all of my previous posts below.
The Bruiser-Brute
The Business-Beast
The Hearth-Heart
The Meddle-Mentor
The Outlaw-Outcast
The Rogue-Renegade
The Trick-Taker
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So, fun detail I just noticed about Megamind:
Famously, throughout the film Megamind mispronounces certain words, most notably: "hello" ("olo"), "Metro City" ("Metrocity") and "school" ("shool").
Like many fans, I'd attributed this and other oddities— like not knowing what a window is— to his unconventional upbringing and general social isolation. His speech sounds a lot like the way people pronounce words that they've only seen written down, so maybe he just hasn't had enough practice talking to other people out loud.
Lovely theory, very angsty, makes sense that this would be what the film-makers intended.
Except…
You know who doesn't seem to have this problem with pronunciation? And who in fact attempts to correct Megamind's pronunciation of various words more than any other character?
Fucking Minion.
Minion was there for literally every step of Megamind's childhood. They were raised on Earth together and went through seemingly the exact same experiences. Yet somehow Minion came out the other end knowing how to answer the phone and what a window is and why people use codes, while Megamind didn't.
And I am just so fascinated as to why.
Top three theories:
1. Megamind isn't actually mispronouncing words due to lack of practice, but rather for some other reason.
Maybe there's something up with his ability to hear certain sounds, or his alien anatomy makes it harder to pronounce them. Maybe he's neurodivergent (I mean, he definitely is, but maybe that fact is affecting his speech).
2. Megamind is mispronouncing things due to lack of practice, but there's something about Minion that makes him need less practice to pick up new languages.
Possibly as part of their protective role, his species has advanced language acquisition programmed in so they can act as translators. Else, while Minion and Megamind landed on Earth together, it's not 100% clear whether they were actually at the same age/developmental stage when that happened. If Minion was an adult (or older child) when he became fluent in English, he might have consciously focused more on accurate pronunciation than Megamind did.
3. Megamind is mispronouncing things due to lack of practice, but Minion is getting more practice than him.
This is… honestly the theory with the most evidence behind it. Like, we know that Minion isn't in jail at the start of the film, so he's clearly mot spending the same amount of time in solitary confinement that Megamind is.
He also appears to be in charge of providing Megamind with the resources needed to carry out his plans, which would presumably require him to communicate with scrap merchants, crocodile breeders and Romanian outlet store owners (among others) on the regular.
And like… if he's not getting thrown in jail whenever Megamind does, and Megamind is spending a fair amount of time on the inside, then Minion has to be doing something to pass the time. He's clearly a bit of an extrovert, and seems to take more pleasure in interacting with people than Megamind does.
It seems unlikely that he'd spend all his time sitting in the Evil Lair waiting for Megamind contact him or escape. So what does he do?
I find it both sweet and hilarious to imagine that Minion actually does have his own social circle outside of Megamind.
Minion goes to DnD on the second Tuesday of every month.
Minion gets advice on making costumes for Megamind from his weekly sewing circle.
Minion has been going to university online for the past eight years and is currently working towards his PhD in Marine Biology.
Minion is a semi-regular at Metrocity Night Clubs.
Minion does volunteer work sometimes with kids at the Metrocity hospital.
Megamind has barely any idea about any of this. Like, he knows Minion goes places at various times.
He knows that when he's rampaging through the streets Minion will sometimes stop to wave hello to various people that Megamind has never met. He's seen the half-orc paladin costume that Minion made for DnD.
But he's never really asked about it, and Minion has never seen the need to tell him. So long as Minion's happy, Megamind's happy, and so long as Megamind's happy, Minion is happy.
Meanwhile Roxanna, post-movie, has to grapple with the fact that sometimes she'll go to visit her boyfriend only for him to ask if they can go out for dinner instead because Minion's book club is meeting in the Evil Lair, and he's been gently encouraged not to come back after what he said to Helen about her (wrong) opinions on To Kill A Mockingbird.
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Long Harry Potter fic recs
I tend to revert back to ye olden ways whenever I'm stressed, so of course I've been going down a rabbit hole of increasingly longer Harry Potter fics. I found some hidden (and not so hidden) gems along the way, and I figured I'd rec them for everyone to enjoy.
Most are slash, some are gen, pairings vary but they are all harry centric!
Fics are completed and arranged by length, do send the authors some love! If you have a specific ship you want recs for, just message me, I probably have some!
The Best
say_no_more
Summary:
Cedric demands only the best of himself, and for himself. The best marks in school, the best position on the quidditch team, and the best reputation. When it's time for him to begin dating, he won't settle for less than the best partner, as well.
80k Cedric/Harry
Independent Study
SomewheresSword
Summary:
Dumbledore doesn't make it in time for Harry's trial, and the outcome is very different. Harry is expelled, his wand snapped.
But he refuses to give up. And he is done waiting around for Albus Dumbledore to give him information.
Deciding to take his life into his own hands, Harry asks for training from several Order members, preparing himself to fight Voldemort while the whole wizarding world believes he's helpless and back in the muggle world.
Meanwhile, his friends are at Hogwarts, tackling their own problems in the form of Dolores Umbridge. Harry hadn't expected the separation to be so difficult - or for a certain mischievous redhead to make the waiting game they'd entered into so very excruciating.
He might have lost his home in Hogwarts, but with Sirius and Remus around, Harry begins to learn that rebuilding a family isn't as hard as he'd anticipated.
144k George/Harry
Green & Gold
JessalynMichele
Summary:
Harry Potter is a traumatized war veteran in a body that won’t die and a mind that won’t rest.
Jasper Hale is intrigued by this new student who looks so vulnerable but sends off such overwhelming waves of angst.
Everyone else is just concerned.
Set post Battle of Hogwarts, starting in the summer before Bella Swans junior year.
144k Jasper Hale / Harry Potter twilight crossover
(this is a series, but the works are finished in themselves)
good night, darling
purplemineralwater
Summary:
"I can send you back. Not to your body, but to one many years ago. Harry, you must fix the natural order of Death, on my behalf."
Harry's breath faltered. It was all so confusing... Harry had died. He had died and spoken to Death and suddenly he was standing in Hogwarts, in 1942, and the Sorting Hat had just pronounced him Slytherin. Death had chuckled at that.
Tomarry 160k
Digging for the Bones by Paganaidd
Paganaidd
Summary:
Rather than allowing Harry to stay at Diagon Alley after he blew up Aunt Marge, the Ministry sends Harry back to the Dursleys. Harry returns to school after a terrible summer, to find that he's not the only one with this kind of secret. A student has been killed by his family. New screening measures are put into place by the Ministry: Every student must be given a medical exam and interview to look for child abuse. With Dumbledore facing an inquiry, Snape is entrusted with the task of making sure EVERYONE receives one.
Answer to the "New measures for screening abuse" challenge at Potions and Snitches.
The first chapter contains a character death and the whole story is quite dark. It begins at the beginning of Prisoner of Azkaban and is AU thereafter. Also note: this story is a "Snape is Harry's biological dad" story. This is not supposed to be the central theme of the story, but people have gotten annoyed that I didn't tell them at the beginning.
200k severitus
The Fourth Horseman
NinjaPandaScholar
Summary:
If anyone's due an identity crisis, it's Harry Potter...especially if he's not really a Potter...and possibly not able to die...yeah, it's been a rough few years...maybe life. Running from his problems and grief sounds like a great idea, becoming a hunter might be fun, too bad it just so happens to be the apocalypse. George is certain this is all just Harry's luck and along for the insane ride and the wonderful distraction. Dean and Sam Winchester are exceptionally confused about why two random Brits are following them around now, and why hasn't anyone seen a single omen for the Fourth Horseman of the apocalypse, Death?
Castiel/Harry supernatural crossover 200k
The Medium Between Life and Death
NinjaPandaScholar
Summary:
There were very few things in Harry Potter's life that he was certain of. There was one absolute certainty though; he'd felt it in his bones for as long as he could remember. He, Harry Potter, was dead. The living people around him might not believe, but the dead sure did. Oh well, it doesn't impact his life much. Besides, it's nice to get help with his schoolwork from his parents.
250k Cedric/Harry
All Hail the Dark Lord, Or Something Idiotic Like That
NinjaPandaScholar
Summary:
Harry Potter had a plan...it wasn't a very good plan, but at least it was simple.
Step 1: Don't die from the insanely difficult ritual
Step 2: Cause as much chaos to the timeline as possible before getting killed and/or arrested
As it goes, it was really simple...until it became clear he wasn't traveling back in time alone. Now the whole plan has to change.
Step 1: Don't die from the ritual
Step 2: Kill off current Dark Lord
Step 3: Establish following to become new Dark Lord
Step 4: Overthrow Ministry
Step 5: Cause as much chaos to the timeline as possible
Step 6: Keep boyfriend alive and not mad at him
It was a work in progress, but plans hadn't worked out well for Harry in the past regardless. Oh well, it's not like he could make things worse...
270k Percy/Harry
Harry Potter and the Welcome to the World of Grey
sobsicles
Summary:
When Harry fails to keep his anger at bay and Voldemort possesses his mind, the events that follow lead him down a long road to realizing the world isn't as black and white as it seems.
Chaos, hilarity, and tragedy ensue with a Dark Lord being honest all the time, a rival becoming something else, and a world demanding to be saved. Featuring frightened Death Eaters, deep conversations with a monster, Pureblood traditions being ridiculous, and the fight to do the right thing with no true options.
Harry's life just gets more and more bizarre with each passing moment.
~~~
Or, the one where Harry's life gets split in half, and he has to figure out how to bring it back together.
450k Drarry
A Very Slytherin Harry
Creator:
geoffaree
Blaise/Harry 630 k not complete but finished in itself series
#harry potter#fanfic rec#vio's recs#rarepair#cedric x harry#drarry#Percy Weasley x Harry Potter#tomarry
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Oooh since you're on a Sukuita streak, I'm dying to know how you think Yuuji and Sukuna feel about each other in chapter 271 👀 that's a question that's been nagging at me since we don't see this new and enlightened Sukuna interact with or mention Yuuji (unfortunately 😔) But I can't help but feel there's some fondness there on both sides
Hi anon! I'm on a sukuita streak bc I'm currently trying to complete my re-read of jjk for my skit analysis but failing terribly because I'm busy as hell (+ they're on my mind a lot these days). Thank you for allowing me to yap a bit more about them in the meantime tho!
I'll start everything off with this: Everything's very subtle in these few last chapters and it's so subtle that some still think nothing's changed. It's there if you care but if you don't, it can easily go over your head.
Now, to answer your question, I'll have to state that my personal opinion is that the moment of Sukuna's change had started since the day of his reincarnation into Yuuji's body, but that he only acknowledged it in Chapter 271- when he finally called him by his full name. I'll keep it brief here but will offer a more proper explanation in my analysis. For now, I'll just put it like this: Sukuna was changing but wasn't admitting it to himself. He was fighting that and lost because of that. If he was still as unhinged as he was back in the Heian era and didn't give two fucks, trust me, the ending (and his relationship with Yuuji) would've been waaaaay different that it is now.
This opinion of mine has affected how I view canon in some aspects and hence, to me, it makes it plausible that their relationship would've been the same whether at Chapter 1 or post-embraced "change" (Chapter 268 and 271).
It would not be a total "change" with them skipping rocks and laughing and being all lovey dovey but rather... no longer extreme but sort of reluctant, awkward and competitive (with lots of teasing) friendship??? There would be similar vibe they had when we first grew to love them. I do think there would've been more pronounced fondness there after the acceptance.
The reason for all of this up above is that this is a shonen work and that they're labeled as enemies (meaning that if it was a different genre, you know damn well they'd be lovers...).
Anyway, Yuuji had officially joined the "favored by Sukuna" club when Sukuna called him by his full name and was "surprised" he'd take this "farce" so far. One thing that's known about Sukuna is that he tends to compliment his opponents and then say their name and Yuuji seemingly joins the trend... with an insult (but I'd call it a disguised compliment).
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and yeah, I know, "How can I claim that it means something when he didn't compliment him nor his abilities?"
Well, that's the thing. There's always something different.
If there's one thing unique to these two, it's the fact that they're stubborn shits whose relationship is like a locked room mystery. The key is to pay close attention. Don't trust the words, look at the actions because it isn't that simple. That's where usually those who don't care fail to see the relevance and why they're confused with, for example, why Yuuji told Sukuna that he is him. It's because it's not directly stated, but rather hinted at, time and time again. These two have that sort of relationship, one extremely layered, with lies and deceit, and haunted by double meaning and subtext.
Yuuji was always the one (and I cannot stress that enough). If you've read this manga then you know just how yappy and weird Sukuna tends to get about this "insignificant brat" who he relentlessly mocks and teases and argues with and then claims he's boring. He's constantly doing the opposite of what he says when it comes to Yuuji, and as it happens, so does Yuuji too.
Yuuji is always singled out. Even if he blended into the surroundings and disappeared, Sukuna would still manage to find a trace of him because that's totally a normal way to think about someone you deem "insignificant". The same goes with Yuuji, who in his intent in stopping Sukuna, forgets about his act of being the embodiment of good (and claiming moral superiority to Sukuna) and goes on to cannibalize his half-brothers (which is... very Sukuna of him). This is even given more relevance when you remember Sukuna never ate someone in the story despite being proclaimed "a cannibal".
Still, this is why Yuuji no longer argues about morals with him and why his talk with him in 265 appeals to the fact that they are similar, more than they can even seem to admit and that arguing against who's right and wrong is pointless.
The reason why Yuuji is singled out is because he is the closest we'll ever know of Sukuna who doesn't talk about himself much. They may seem vastly different at first, but as you go deeper and deeper into the story, the lines between them start to blur and at times, even Yuuji's behavior is unexplainable because even he, too, doesn't act accordingly at times. They're both the same (said by Yuuji himself) and hence via them interacting with each other is how we learn more and more about them individually. Because, even if they are "the same", they are still different because their choices are what shaped them as well as how they view life (again, stated by Yuuji himself).
They're not your "everything is right there", but rather "everything is there if you know how to look". In my revisiting of Chapter 271, I realized that Sukuna had already stated everything there is to state. The fact that he's open with others, that he's capable of being weak, finding weak opponents "worthy", being killed, being defeated, being treated as a human being... all of that goes to Yuuji.
He doesn't need to state anything directly because he's quite a skilled liar:
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Sukuna had lived for years. He wasn't defeated, instead, he accepted Kenjaku's proposal and sealed himself into fingers for a different purpose. That purpose was participation in the Culling Games. Why did he do that? Well he didn't give any explanation so we have figure it out.
Back then, there was no Itadori Yuuji and back then Sukuna was hailed as the strongest with no one there to equal him. He was feared, revered, loved, hated, but ultimately never defeated. Also, he was cursed. If this curse (as he calls himself) lived according to his principles, he'd be enjoying every second of his life, but in the Yorozu flashback he appears... very bored. That's the first contradiction that we have with Sukuna. The fact that he lives according to his own whims yet never appears satisfied nor happy. Hell the happiest he seems is in modern times, when he awakens in Yuuji's body and excitedly shouts about how much things have changed.
Now was Kenjaku's proposal just giving Sukuna more people to slaughter in the future? No. Seems pointless. Could it be that they were offering Sukuna a way out from the curse that he was carrying? Seems way more probable. After all, Kenjaku would go on to create Yuuji, and curiously, he'd be the one to take everything away- liberate Sukuna from his curse and offer him a different perspective, even offer to be there for him no matter what (which again, I cannot fucking imagine is actual reality... I still think 268 is a fever dream).
The truth comes out in the end, after Yuuji looks at his torn fingers, calls Sukuna's fingers harmless and smiles at the sky. Sukuna isn't even alive and yet Yuuji predicts correctly that he's harmless- as Sukuna would go on to say that he lost and that it'll be nice to take a different path in life. It's just confirmation that the fondness he has for him is there because he doesn't belittle him, doesn't make any negative comments but just... says it's all good and smiles. The same is true for Sukuna because he's no longer stubbornly clinging on to his way of "contradictory living" and is actually considering doing what Yuuji told him. He doesn't vehemently reject the idea (as would be expected), but rather embraces it.
Courtesy of Itadori Yuuji.
Again, to quote myself:
Sukuna had stated everything there is to state. The fact that he's open with others, that he's capable of being weak, finding weak opponents "worthy", being killed, being defeated, being treated as a human being... all of that goes to Yuuji.
This is what Sukuna had learned via Yuuji, something that he had no way of experiencing before, otherwise he would've changed a long time ago and wouldn't stubbornly cling to life nor make deals with Kenjaku who also longed for fulfillment (which they had found ;) ). It seems pointless to trap yourself just to kill more people in the future or cause "mass chaos" via the Merger, just because "the humans have different flavors". I bet he also had a great share of amazing battles and "unique flavors" even back then and besides, doing grand schemes for shits and giggles is a bit boring. Hence why "looking for a way out of his cursed state" / "change" is a more better explanation imo.
So! I went off track here a bit lmfao. But yep, Sukuna is quite a good liar. The change he was looking for- something which didn't bring him fulfillment back in the Heian era- was found in the modern era, where he shared a body with this brat who will ultimately "change the trajectory of his life".
Sukuna lived within Yuuji and even if he likes to pretend that he doesn't know him, he does. He knows him just as well as Yuuji knows him in return. The narrative spells it out. Both of them are extremely strong and quite perceptive about others so why in the hell's name would they not be about each other? It appears like they've just been blind or ignoring the truth until they had to face it.
Still, anon, I understand the feeling and I know it seems weird and off to just end it like that without discussing it in greater detail, especially after what I ranted about above. Their relationship is a clusterfuck and that's why I love them a lot because you can't exactly place where it lies exactly. It's ambiguous as hell, with both romantic, sexual, familial, hell all undertones there are. Are they enemies? Are they lovers? Are they just misunderstood friends? Nephew and uncle? Who knows (do not ask Gege).
Even if jjk has ended, it still feels like something's missing. The question and the definite answer. Here, the question is posed and has seemingly remained unanswered because Sukuna's dead and Yuuji alive. They've been separated.
So how will we ever know what enlightened Sukuna thinks about Yuuji? How do they truly feel about each other?
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I talked about it briefly here (regarding Chapter 271 and how valuable it is) and I already discussed up above how I view them. How even if nothing's there, there's still something there and that something is a lot. It seems confusing as hell but it's the best explanation I can give you.
In short: Yes, there is fondness there post-Chapter 271 due to just how much these two had impacted each other and how the ending played out and I bet there's a lot of suppressed love which couldn't get out due to Sukuna being lowkey put off by emotional conversations and quite stubborn in his view of life and being "misunderstood". Yuuji is way more open emotionally and hence why he's all "sunshine and rainbows about it" while Sukuna is still being subdued about it... but not totally because even he admitted that he lost to Yuuji and that his "farce" got him good in the end (so much so that he'd love to meet him again if there is life again).
In true tragic romance cliche fashion, our fated lovers enemies do not make it but alas, it isn't that dark and the send off is extremely pretty imo. Sure, like I said, it's confusing if you don't know the details nor dwell on it but yeah. They are... just being them. I love them lol.
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𝙎𝙖𝙡(𝙞)𝙫𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣
requested by @lilacmingi ♥
~☁☼☁~
You patted a stray hair off your lilac skirt, the velvet plush beneath your shaking fingers. You pulled at a tight coil of your hair, twisting and releasing it from your updo. An unexpected weakness had befallen you. Goosebumps littered your chest, the deep neckline normally thrilling but unwelcome today as you shook with chills.
It was an unfortunate time to fall ill, as you were attending a ball of great grandeur. The domed ceiling of the palace was ivory, etched with intricate depictions of gothic scenery. Angels clashed spears with the fangs of great beasts, serpents and hounds alike coming to wage battle on the figureheads of Heaven. Marble pillars held up the artwork in a star pattern, and moonlight filtered in through the multicolored windows. You felt rather small in comparison to the rich, dizzying landscape.
You sat in a corner with your head against the wall, still overwhelmed. You had managed to sneak out into a narrower hall, seeking a smaller space, though this smaller space was still large enough to house a baby giant.
"My dear, you seem lost." A short man in a lacy top and slick raven hair walked up to you from around the corner. Your eyes widened, and you scrambled to get up. Your blood pressure dropped as you stood, and you leaned against the wall.
The man chuckled. It was a pitchy, sinister sound. "Did I take your breath away? I apologize."
"No, not at all," you said breathlessly.
Something about this man seemed familiar. "From where are you visiting?" You asked.
He grinned, pointed incisors gleaming. "Family of the host."
Oh.
"You're Bumjoong's brother?"
He nodded and extended a gloved hand to you. "You can call me Hongjoong. Come, let me take you back to the ballroom." You groaned internally, not wanting to go back to the loud, sweaty room you had just escaped. But you had to be polite.
You took his hand in yours, wrapping your fingers around his. His hand was nearly the same size as yours, which was kind of charming. He led you to the ballroom, which was gargantuan in comparison to the already huge hall you had come from. Scarlet curtains adorned the massive windows, and amber lights framed the huge room. People whirled around in masses, and you already felt queasy.
Maybe your discomfort was visible, because Hongjoong tilted his head to look you in the eyes. "Such events aren't much to my taste either. But we shall converse to pass the time, yes? What's your name?"
You told him, and he spoke it aloud carefully, as though pronouncing a word from another language. "How melodious. It suits its owner." He ran his tongue across his pearly teeth absentmindedly. His skin was pale, but not with any rosy or golden undertones. His pallor was like milk. Almost like there was no blood running under the skin. His nose was small and sharp. His features were almost too perfect.
He noticed you examining him, and he smiled with his chin resting on one hand, revealing his pointed teeth once again.
You cleared your throat. "You know, there are rumors of your family being vampires," you remarked, holding back a cough.
"Is that so? What do you think about them?" He seemed truly interested.
"I think there are a lot of things I've yet to see in this world."
He laughed heartily at that. "Did you know vampire saliva has healing properties? Our ashes too, but I'd rather not deal with the implications of that option. I think it would be beneficial for me to demonstrate."
"Oh? Why?" The corners of his lips twitched up. "You're not feeling well, are you my dear?"
You feigned ignorance, but he was right. You were intensely feverish. "Perhaps I'm not feeling all that fit," you admitted.
"Then let me show you my theory."
Your brows twitched, a bit of feverish delirium surfacing. "How do I know you won't bite me?" You asked in a low voice.
"I guess you'll have to take a chance." And with that, his lips were on your neck. You gasped as his tongue drew a line from your clavicle to the crook of your neck, and his lips gently closed around a patch of flesh. His teeth grazed your skin, but true to his word, he never bit.
His arm looped around your waist as you sank to the floor in his arms, his rough tongue still lapping at your neck. Your eyes rolled back as he tenderly sucked you like a thick smoothie.
Within a few minutes, a cool sensation spread from the base of your neck through your body, and he rubbed your arm as you shuddered. Your wooziness faded gradually.
"Better?" He asked.
"Yes," you said.
Unfortunately, quite a few people were now staring at you.
Oops.
~☁☼☁~
requests are open!
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Prompt: “You won’t get rid of me so easily.”
Pairing: Clegan
Thank you for this, it was a lot of fun and a very nice distraction from the one shot that does Not Want to be written lmao Also, I finally managed to write something shorter than 2k, yay 😂 This is 681 words that I hope you'll like ❤️ Featuring two very-much-in-love and caring Buckies, a guilty Buck and a head-over-heels Bucky Also on AO3 My other Clegan fics
I'd rather be in hell with you (Than in Heaven with somebody else) | Buck x Bucky
"You won't get rid of me that easily," the teasing falls flat despite his best attempt but his lips curl in a soft smile as he looks up, though it falls too when he takes in the state of the other man. Gale's hand shakes slightly as it drags a wet rag on his forehead, cleansing away the blood and the mud. His lips purse, eyes tightening above purplish bruises and cheekbones more pronounced than ten days ago and it hurts John more than the German mob ever did.
"Buck," Gale hums but doesn't stop his ministrations, jaw clenching every time he tries to meet John's eyes and is faced with the bruise of his swollen right eye instead. Heart leaping in his throat, John closes his hand around Gale's wrist -had it always been so thin?-, effectively stopping him in his care, tired eyes glued to John's fingers around his wrist with something looking an awful lot like longing in the blue John missed so much. Tenderly, he squeezes the wrist in his hand, trying not to worry at how fragile it feels in his hold, how his thumb entirely covers his forefinger's last knuckle. He doesn't have to try to pour all the love and devotion he feels in his voice, rough from raw emotions but unshakeable in its conviction.
"I'm with you." Gale flinches a bit at that, eyes slipping closed as though in pain before he opens them again and refuses to let them leave the dirty wooden floor. There's a half-hearted attempt at tugging his wrist out of John's grip but a mere squeeze is enough for Gale to deflate, a shaky sigh that sounds like crying carried away by the heavy air surrounding them. With John sitting on the edge of a bunk and Gale standing in the space John's carved for him between his legs, he has a front row to watch the blond man worrying at his bottom lip, a frown etched deeply on his forehead and eyes full of sadness and-
Oh.
John recognizes that twirl of emotions, like a storm looming over the ocean. It's the same he felt when he saw Gale through that fence for the first time, once the heavenly chants of 'he's alive' had quieted enough for him to hear the cries of men condemned to a slow death in cages.
Heart squeezing painfully, he swallows past the lump in his throat and turns his head in the cradle of Gale's calloused but oh-so-gentle palm, nuzzling the sensitive skin there for a bit before touching his lips to Gale's pulse point, softer and with more reverence than he's ever kissed a cross. He allows himself the small indulgence of closing his eyes as he stays there for a bit, Gale's heart beating under his lips, his skin warm against his face.
Gale, alive and there, back at John's side where he's always belonged.
Above him, Gale takes a shuddering inhale, and John opens his eyes at his call, finds him looking back with such love and fondness he can only mirror it. For a second as he smiles softly at the love of his life, he's soaring through the skies. When he speaks, voice tucked against Gale's wrist, he does not speak a lie but the truth his heart sings.
"There's nowhere else I'd rather be." Gale smiles a bit then, eyes suspiciously wet but he leans down to press a lingering kiss on Bucky's forehead, and it's John's turn to close his eyes to swallow his tears. It feels like salvation, to finally be so close he can breathe a lungful of Gale.
John tilts his head up, and Buck obliges the silent request in a heartbeat, as though he'd been waiting for permission- which is ludicrous in John's mind.
After days of wondering if he'll ever feel Gale's touch again, feel him warm and breathing under his fingertips, Gale slots their lips together like John's the piece he's been missing since October 8th, both hands now cupping his face tenderly, and it feels like hope.
#clegan#buck x bucky#clegan fic#mota#masters of the air#mota fanfic#buck squared#john bucky egan#gale buck cleven#ali writes
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