#i can help but see that every time two characters just say hi tk each other evwryone assumes that theh are in love

[censorious-asshat]

Quick word : two characters interacting with each other doesn't mean that they are in love with each other

[heyclickadee]

Things about "The Outpost" that are still killing me:

1. That airstrip was huge. And by the time we see Mayday and Crosshair on it they've been walking across it for a while, at the rate they’re going. The TK troopers don't see them at first, but once they do, they gather, see this:

These two men, barely on their feet, clearly in pain, one of them unable to keep holding on to his crutch anymore, staggering towards them inch by inch, looking towards them for help--not a single one of the TK troopers offers any kind of assistance whatsoever. No one calls for a medic, no one rushes forward to carry Mayday. They all just stand there and watch. And when Nolan tells them to go, they do, because they probably don't see the clones that differently than Nolan does.  

Yeah, Lieutenant Nolan is an asshole. He went from, "I'm probably going to dislike this guy," to, "LOATHE," in my book with a single line. He's a pathetic officer-wannabe who genuinely thinks of the clones as machinery he can push around and direct how he likes. He doesn't see the problem with kicking around someone like Mayday--someone who technically outranks him, I think--or the danger inherent in goading someone like Crosshair, because he doesn't see either of them as reasoning, emotion-having people who may just retaliate if pushed far enough. He's a snake and he deserved what he got. But his malice is more than matched by the TK troopers' apathy.

2. The way that there's ice and snow frozen to Crosshair's armor on the landing strip, and the fact that Mayday can't quite make it to the end of the tarmac, nor is Crosshair able to continue carrying him. They're both so cold and tired. They've both hit their physical limit and it would have been enough if anyone had cared to help.

3. Crosshair is--literally--stripped of everything that marks him as an imperial soldier or a soldier at all by the end of the episode, and most of it is stuff he casts aside himself. His CT number (in a way, when he gives Mayday his name), his helmet that he doesn't even look for (there as SO MANY good helmet metas out there, so I'm not going to get into it), his rifle (which he gives to Mayday to use as a crutch and doesn't retrieve when Mayday drops it), his backpack (I'm guessing it got too heavy so he threw it away to keep carrying Mayday), and even his armor, reflection mirror...sticker...things, and sidepiece (all of which are taken from him after he blacks out. I'm not real happy about the fact that the scientists at Mount Tantiss changed his clothes while he was unconscious). Of course, the last few function a little bit differently than they first ones do. The CT number, the helmet, the rifle, and I guess (?) even the backpack (though to a much lesser extent) are all Crosshair intentionally putting his imperial identity aside in order to help someone he sees as a brother and re-humanizing himself in the process. The last couple--the armor, the sidepiece--that's the writers telling us how vulnerable Crosshair is in his current situation.

4. The SNOW and the way it interacted with the CHARACTERS was just *chef's kiss* Credit to Joel Aron and the effects department, you guys knocked it out of the park.

5. Likewise, while I'm really glad The Bad Batch does list the names of the animators at CGCG who worked on each episode in the credits (because guess what--not every animated show does this. Sometimes they just list the name of the studio), I really want to know which animators were responsible for animating Crosshair this time around. Or at least Crosshair's shots, since the way I think it often works is that an animator will be assigned a series of shots and be responsible for animating everyone in those shots, because oh boy, was that a performance. Crosshair's animation has always been standout, I think partly (partly) because he's a character that doesn't actually talk that much, and says stuff he doesn't mean at least half the time, so there has to be a certain level of clarity and nuance in his performance for the character comes across the way the writers intend (and partly because being an ultra-expressive but taciturn bundle of emotions is a big part of Crosshair as a person). But the team working on this episode took something that was already great and kicked it up another level.

6. I want to know if Jennifer Corbett, the board artists, layout artists, the other writers, the directors, and others high-fived each other when they came up with the ice vulture symbolism and the rock-wings shot. I want to know if they knew we'd go crazy over it.

7. Mayday. Literally everything about Mayday. Mayday my beloved. *cries*

8. The look on Crosshair's face when he's about to pass out and sees the TK troopers coming still messes me up, because it's the closest thing we've gotten to a real smile (one that actually reaches his eyes) pretty much since he was teasing Echo in the med bay in "Aftermath." Crosshair's someone who's come across as to me passively suicidal since the moment he turned around after the droid fight in "Return to Kamino" and saw Hunter and the rest pointing their guns at him. Passively--meaning that he's not going to actually do anything, that he doesn't actually want to die, he’ll survive however he can, but that he's not exactly planning for the future, either. He'll just keep doing what he's doing until it (almost definitely) kills him. And. I mean. Crosshair's not stupid. He knows what killing Lieutenant Nolan means for him. I'm not saying that Crosshair didn't expect to wake up afterwards, or that he wanted to not wake up, but I am saying that he did decide that avenging Mayday and defying the Empire in whatever small way he could was worth dying for. And that he was very, very tired.

9. I'm so! Glad! That Crosshair's growth wasn't centered around Omega, Wrecker, Tech, Hunter, or Echo. We already know that he cares about them. Showing us the lengths he'll go to help a relative stranger instead and making that his breaking point does so much more to tell us that he's grown.

10. The thing that sticks with me most, though, is the fact that this episode wasn't just sad. It wasn't just unrelenting tragedy, or even like "The Solitary Clone," where overriding emotion of the whole episode is despair. I mean, yes, this episode is sad. It's tragic. You have Lieutenant Nolan's cruelty, you have the malice of the Empire, you have the apathy of the TK troopers, the dehumanization of the clones, the soul-crushing way in which Mayday and Crosshair find out that the clones were always going to be replaced, that inevitability, the futility (on one level) struggle that ends in Mayday's death. 

But it's not just that. There's warmth, too. There's camraderie and a little bit of humor. Mayday, a survivor starting to see how pointless it all was, and Crosshair, who's so desperate for companionship at this point that he'd pack bond with a rock, snark back and forth at each other a little bit like old friends. Heck, this is the episode where we get the most profound act of compassion we've seen in the show so far. Mayday didn't have to disarm that mine and save Crosshair, but he did, and it matters. No, Mayday didn't make it, but Crosshair carried him through a blizzard for two days and made sure he didn't get left behind or die alone, even if he couldn't save him, and that matters. Yes, Crosshair's a prisoner now, but he chose to avenge Mayday, grab hold of his own humanity again, and told the Empire where to stuff it, and that matters. Kindness and defiance have their own meaning, even if they don't change the outcome. But the fact that this episode is more than just sad is, I think, why it's so harrowing in the first place.

[csolarstorm]

Thoughts on: Digimon: The Last Evolution Kizuna (and 02 musings)

Tomorrow I'm going to go see Digimon 02: The Beginning in the theater! I'm so glad I decided to do this. It's been a while since I got out and did something, and the timing is perfect to see my favorite Digimon team again!

I try to imagine that Kari sounds the same though. That...can't be helped I guess. 😮‍💨 They couldn't afford her VA apparently.

To get myself caught up, I finally watched Last Evolution Kizuna! This is definitely my favorite Digimon movie now.

Okay, I've only watched two. And Summer Wars is probably my second favorite Digimon movie.

Okay yes, I like the Fox Kids Digimon Movie. But more in a nostalgic way. Last Evolution Kizuna (and on a different subject Summer Wars) are really enjoyable as an adult. Maybe I should watch the original Japanese Digimon movies that Fox Kids cut up.

There's one glaring flaw in the premise of the movie though. How is it that Digimon disappear when their chosen kids run out of potential when almost every member of the team BESIDES Tai and Matt already settled on a career path and their Digimon are fine?

That's supposed to be why Sora's Digivice was already rusting. She had already grown up, embraced flower arranging, and decided to stay with Biyomon until she disappeared.

Izzy's already a freakin' tech tycoon. (Calls to mind Cranston Industries from Power Rangers Once and Always.) I'm pretty sure he's not going to change his mind and go into basket weaving.

Unless "run out of potential" has a darker meaning, and Tai and Matt are out of potential career paths.

They also said it had to do with Omnimon using up their power - and that would make sense considering Agumon and Gabumon fought a lot more than the other Digimon...but that doesn't explain Sora and Biyomon.

The premise was a good idea though, and I thought they handled the emotion of it skillfully. That last moment where Tai and Matt look over and their Digimon have already vanished...you could see it from a mile away, but that doesn't lessen the moment.

How can you write a thesis about Digimon and people coexisting? What professor can possibly check that paper?

There was a part in the movie where Tai is talking about what each of the Digidestined are doing with their lives, and as he lists them, he mentions "Kari and Davis". Excusez-moi? Are they...dating?

I know Kari and TK don't necessarily get together in the 02 epilogue, but...did she date Davis?!

*gapes*

I heard that 02: The Beginning gives the new character more screen time than the actual 02 kids. And that's fine. I'm looking forward to seeing this new character's story, which will hopefully have 02's brand of horror. Kizuna had some fun scenes with the 02 team, and it was nice to reminisce, even if Davis sounds wrong.

And Kizuna's story felt like it could fit in 02! It's really unsettling that Menoa messed with Morphomon's data, nevertheless that she had the "lifeless" data of her partner at all. She must have been mistaken about what that data represented — Digimon never die. The way she says Morphomon's voice talked to her reminded me of Myotismon talking to Oikawa.

It never explained where the aurora came from, and I have trouble believing that the real Morphomon wanted her to do this, so either Menoa accessed some real craziness power inside her, or there was a Digimon that came through the aurora and pulled the strings. I expected the source of that voice to be the final boss, just like MaloMyotismon at the end of 02. Then again, Eosmon did smile at Menoa at the end, suggesting that it was Morphomon, so...maybe it was Morphomon who came through the aurora. Maybe they were villains together.

My favorite 02 movie would be...just more of 02, I guess. More Ken grappling with his identity. More Kari fighting off the Dark Ocean. A confrontation with Dragomon and the Daemon Corps. And some actual stories with the international Digidestined! I loved seeing all the cameos of the international Digidestined in Kizuna. It would just be cool to develop some of them.

The thing is...02 was the season to get a literal epilogue. Even though Adventure had that teary goodbye (the first of many 🙄) 02 actually ended with the truth that life just keeps changing and moving forward.

It wouldn't make sense for Ken to still be plagued by his days as the Digimon Emperor, or for Kari to still be running from Cthulu. After all, she definitely has a restraining order on him now. The 02 kids have grown and changed; that's not what they're dealing with anymore. And in that sense, even though the characters aren't, 02 is over.

So when it gets a new movie, it only makes sense to make it about a new character, with the old characters to help them.

That's the other problem with Kizuna that 02 technically does better. Growing up is one thing, but when you get older, your past doesn't just disappear, it's a part of you that develops with you as you change and grow. Our memories richen with new meanings as we gain new perspectives. And you also don't suddenly lose all your potential either! People change careers and they learn new things throughout their whole life. The fact that Matt had to keep asking TK to babysit Gabumon seems more realistic than Agumon and Gabumon conveniently disappearing.

Despite this, I do like the idea that potential is what powers the partner Digimon. This is why Digimon Digivolve when their partners learn something new. It makes sense.

And Kizuna does not contradict the 02 epilogue. Digimon never truly die. They'll meet again, but they'll just be normal Digimon, leaving the battle between good and evil to the next generation.

Or the franchise will drag them out for another adventure. 🤷‍♂️ I'd watch it!

[reyesstrand]

From what I can see, the people who feel that Carlos's character was ruined are either people who didn't like the Iris storyline (which I can understand) or people who've spent so long saying that TK sucks and Carlos deserves better but couldn't say anything at the start of this season bc now Carlos was the one that messed up. Either way, while I get annoyed at people hating on TK, I've really enjoyed this season even through moments where the writing wasn't great

as i and others have said, there’s a way for the two thought processes of ooh that writing was rushed and sloppy and i really enjoyed the bulk of this season to coexist. and!! it’s possible for that enjoyment to be genuine. i just….i don’t know how to word this. but we’ve come to accept that ignoring elements of this show is par for the course. this has happened with the timeline, with questionable character choices early on, etc, so i find putting aside small issues like the iris plot complicating s1 carlos’ reaction to iris being missing and tk being so close to the reyes family that he probably would’ve found out sooner easy if it means i get to appreciate how much this storyline added to carlos. he’s had his “sassy” moments from s1 on and loved for it, and that’s only been accelerated this season and shown further that his jokes are a deflecting technique as a trauma response. he’s been burdened by this weight of internalized homophobia and complicated ideals around masculinity for his whole life, and to me that makes everything in hindsight that much more nuanced and that much more hopeful, that he got the happy ending he did. plus….iris is fun. iris’s moments in episode three made me cry. not everyone has to like her but i implore people to respect her and the fans watching who may have close connection to mental illness/family with mental illness, and i think it’s nice to know that carlos had her back and she’s had his back since they were kids. that’s an element this season gave us that makes me warm.

at the end of the day everyone watches this show (and anything really) with their own subjective view of what’s “good” and what’s “bad,” but something i’ve found helped me specifically with lone star and specifically with tarlos is thinking that like…..no matter how i would’ve reacted to certain things, carlos always chooses tk and tk always chooses carlos. they make each other happy, they love each other more than anything. we’re watching a fictional couple in a fictional world, and the creators’ job through the seasons is to expand on them more. i like that neither of their trauma responses are necessarily palatable, i like that they’re real, i like that they come home to each other every day and they fight to come home to each other. i do genuinely feel for people who feel disappointed by elements of this season, i really really do. i’ve been close to it. but it makes me wonder why the season they’ve made carlos a Person with the most screen time behind owen is the season he’s ruined because they’ve gone about his story in a way that doesn’t match certain ideals.

[strandnreyes]

taken from my old hollywood au that has finally picked up momentum... super excited to share more of this one!

“First and foremost, you act like a gentleman,” Tony says in a way that indicates there’s no room for negotiation. “That means you keep your nose clean. No bringing home a new gal every night or spending so much time in the bar that you’re stumbling home, at least not in a place where your face will be plastered on the front page of every newspaper by sunrise. You represent the studio now. Every time someone sees you in public, they see us.”

It makes sense, he supposes. He just wasn’t expecting that the expectations were so outright and explicit for each actor. 

Tony mistakes his silence for hesitation as he raises a brow. “Is that going to be a problem?”

“No, sir,” TK says right away. Both an easy truth and a hard lie. 

“It better not be,” Tony says in finality before moving on. “You also need to–” 

A knock on the door behind TK cuts him off and Tony’s annoyed sigh at being interrupted morphs into a surprised smile when he waves the person in.

“Detective Valencia, what can I do for you?” Tony asks.

TK furrows his brow, suddenly on alert as to why there’s a police presence at the studio, but if anything Tony looks thrilled to see whoever’s standing in the doorway. He turns around just in time to see Carlos Reyes standing there in a pinstripe suit with a soft shake to his head. 

“You know if you keep continuing to call me by my characters’ names, I’m going to start to think you forgot my real one,” Carlos smiles.

TK’s familiar with Carlos, ‘America’s New Leading Man’ as he was dubbed after the studio picked him up the year before last for his breakout role. He isn’t sure there’s a soul in the nation who doesn’t know who Carlos is or who hasn't flocked to the theater to watch him. 

For TK it was an escape. Two full hours where he wasn’t slumped over a bar just to forget the telephone call that informed him he was never going to see his mother again. Where he just got to turn off his brain, to watch a story come to life in front of him, to spend more time learning the lines of Carlos’ face than listening to the dialogue. 

The biggest screen in New York doesn’t nearly do justice to what it’s like to be in the same room as him. 

“Of course not. As a matter of fact, TK,” Tony addresses him. “meet Carlos Reyes. Carlos, this is TK Strand, a new contract player here as of,” he checks his watch, “well, about an hour ago.”

Carlos’ eyes finally meet his, a soft smile on his face as he holds out his hand. “It’s a pleasure.” TK subtly wipes his own on his pant leg before reaching to grasp Carlos’. “I heard you read for the role of Sam Pryor this morning for The Monterey Room,” he says as he pulls his hand back.

“I did, yes,” TK answers despite it not being a question. He has to wonder if word simply travels fast or if Carlos himself is involved in the project.

“Well, I was in your spot not too long ago,” he says. “If there’s anything I can help with, don’t hesitate to ask.”

“That’s very kind of you.” TK smiles. “Thank you.”

“So Carlos,” Tony snaps them out of it. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Marjan wanted me to run down here quick to show you the finished look,” Carlos explains after pulling his gaze from TK. “She said she would’ve come with me herself, but Julia just got in and she’s hoping to finish her alterations by the end of the day.” 

Tony stands up to get a better look at him, slowly starting to nod. “You look like you just strolled in here from three decades ago, kid,” he smiles as he drops back down into his chair. “Perfect. Marjan really outdid herself with this one. Combined with what she’s crafted for Julia, you two are going to be all anyone’s talking about.”

“Yes, I think Marjan is understandably proud of this one,” Carlos says and TK can’t help but notice the way he ignores the insinuation that his love interest in the film could blossom beyond that.

“She ought to be,” Tony agrees, “but shouldn’t you be–”

“Tommy and Judson swung through this morning, he mentioned wanting to add a stopwatch, and I’m on my way to Paul next for the final approval,” Carlos answers his unspoken question.

“Good man.” 

TK watches the conversation bounce back and forth between them like a tennis match, picking up bits and pieces. The Julia they’re referring to must be Julia Ainsley, a darling of the studio, and apparently the lead opposite Carlos in the film that TK himself has a shot at.

“I won’t hold you up any longer,” Carlos says gesturing between the two of them. “It was nice to meet you, TK. I look forward to working with you.”

“Oh,” TK says in surprise. “It was nice to meet you, too, but I don’t know if we’ll be…”

Carlos shakes his head. “Tony wouldn’t have you in this room if you weren’t already a shoo-in for the role,” he says in a way that can only accompany a mutual respect between Tony and him. The former clicks his tongue behind TK, as if Carlos just disclosed his process and Carlos laughs before turning back to TK. “I’ve already heard your name whispered in these halls, I have no doubt you’ll make a great Sam.”

“Thank you,” TK stammers out, getting caught on the smile Carlos gives him before he leaves.

[chockfullofsecrets]

"If I'm not careful I'm gonna end up writing content for a character who literally never appears in 141 episodes"

I mean, you are more than welcome to. In fact, we will gratefully encourage this.

you encourage chock? you encourage chock like the author? oh! oh! tk fic for anon! tk fic for anon for Two Thousand Words!

(also, heads up that i am moving next week! have been working on Importance of Timing when i can, but the first chapter probably won't be here for another two weeks at least.)

---

Verin Thelyss, Essek knows, is a seasoned battle commander and strategist.

He’s also in possession of the instinct to tackle people when he’s excited, so Essek is well aware that it’s only those decades of training and experience that have his little brother pausing for the briefest instant as Caleb and Jester teleport him into the hold of the Nein Heroez before he launches himself at Essek in a dead run.

Veth and Caduceus are at their respective homes, Kingsley watching over the ship, but he is far from alone - Yasha and Fjord each have a supportive hand on his shoulder, a silent assurance from the tense minutes waiting for their friends to return from Bazzoxan. They swear in unison and scramble for their weapons as Verin screeches to a halt just shy of shunting Essek straight though the hull and yanks him into a rib-crushing hug.

He burrows into the junction of Essek’s neck and shoulder, made possible only by virtue of the activated floating spell that puts the coiffed swoop of his hair a full inch above Verin’s. “Thank the fucking Light, you’re not actually dead.”

“What the fuck, he’s like a swearing puppy,” Beau hisses. There’s a soft thwap as Fjord gently smacks her across the back of the head.

Essek is feeling out the edges of friendly intimacy, still, stumbling through every brush of fingers and shared look of exasperation, but even he does not need Jester’s frantic gesturing to prompt him to lift his arms and awkwardly wrap them around Verin’s shoulders.

It’s like wrapping a single thread of silk around one of Yasha’s biceps. Clearly he is not built for comforting.

Verin stiffens with a single sharp twitch of his ear against Essek’s collarbone . Essek’s thoughts flail wildly between an expectation of tears or a dagger to his ribs, but his brother just laughs, loud and hearty, and snuggles even further into his personal space. “I see someone’s finally taught you how to hug back - you should have written and told me, this is better news than any number of pages on den politics.”

Essek bristles. “Careful, or I will stop,” he huffs, somewhat more waspishly than he intends to.

Luckily, Verin has proven immune to his moods. “Oh, please don’t,” he insists, voice still crackling with glee. He grins, warm and wide enough that Essek can feel it against the side of his neck. “It just makes doing this that much easier.”

“Doing what,” Essek says reflexively, even as the tiny portion of his brain that he allows to remember his childhood starts to blare an alarm. “Verin-”

It’s far too late to realize that Verin’s hands have somehow been maliciously positioned just along the backs of his ribs.

Jester, standing with Caleb behind Verin, perks up in clear interest as the corners of his mouth start to twitch up. On second thought, Essek thinks he’d have preferred the dagger.

“Verin,” he hisses again, fighting back the anticipatory shiver crawling up his back. “Don’t - don’t you dare-”

It’s about then that Verin’s evil, evil fingers find the edges of his mantle’s arm slits and squeeze him even closer as they stretch to wriggle under his arms.

He snatches his arms back, but it’s too late - a dismayed giggle sneaks from his throat, then another, and then he’s beating helplessly at Verin’s shoulders as he dissolves into high, squeaking laughter.

Every single nerve between his armpits and his ribs squirms in unison - a bubbly, slippery sensation even more potent for how long it’s been since he last felt it. “No,” he shrieks. “I - ahaha! eeheee! - no tickling, no tickling, Verin-”

Jester looks thrilled - she’s bouncing on her toes, babbling something to Caleb that’s inaudible over the rush of his own laughter. Light, the Nein are going to tear him apart for this-

“Yes, tickling,” Verin protests, laughing right along with him. “All the tickling! You let me think you were dead! For months! I thought I was never going to get to watch my poor brother giggle himself to pieces ever again!”

He’s not, because Essek is going to kill him. “That - nahaha, hff, ahaaa! - that was - ha - it’s been decades - stop, stop, there’s people!”

“Yeah, people,” Beau says, loud and smug and far too close behind him. “Hey - Verin, was it? - does hotboi here have a worst spot?”

Oh no. Oh no. Essek squeezes his eyes shut in a desperate attempt to focus and does the only thing he can while laughing like an idiot.

With a shaky flick of his wrist, his floating dispels. Verin yelps in surprise as gravity takes Essek straight out of his grip.

The instant his boots hit the deck, Essek twists the rest of the way out of his grip and bolts.

There’s nowhere to go, really - the Nein have a room full of Counterspells, and Verin can run faster than he can, and he’s already tumbling halfway back into laughter in giddy anticipation of being caught. Still, it’s a surprise when he stumbles into a brick wall of leather and biceps that resolves itself into Yasha as she hoists him back into the air.

“Oh, where do you think you’re going?” She sounds admirably innocent given the soft, teasing smile she gives him.

“Noooo,” Essek giggles. Heat gathers in his cheeks as he tries to make himself stop - it doesn’t make sense, he’s not even being tickled anymore, but even the potential for it flutters light and fizzy at the bottom of his lungs. “I - I’m not ticklish anymore, I’m not-”

The Nein and Verin cluster around the two of them, bubbling with various levels of amusement. “Really?” Beau drawls. “It’s cute that you think denying it has a single fucking chance of working.”

The sarcasm helps him center himself, if only a little - he buries his face in Yasha’s arm and sucks in a deep breath that doesn’t do nearly enough to get rid of his blush.

He straightens as best he can while being bear hugged by a barbarian. “I am denying nothing,” he says carefully. Jester is still bouncing next to Beau, fingertips already twitching where they’re curled sweetly on her cheeks around a mischievous beaming smile, and Essek has to look away before the nervous snickers still wobbling on the back of his tongue can worm their way free. “I am well aware that Verin is - incorrigible-”

He hisses the last word in his brother’s direction - again, harsher than he intends, but he is so unused to being soft around him - and fails to contain a shy smile as Verin sticks his tongue out in retaliation.

Jester’s tail waves its way into the edge of his peripheral vision. He jumps and looks over at Fjord instead. “-but I, ah, I would ask for more respect from the rest of you-”

“You really shouldn’t,” Fjord says, grinning boyishly back at him. “I mean, you know us.”

And then, to Fjord’s right - “Essek?”

He’s been avoiding looking at Caleb. It is foolish, perhaps, to think that after all of the incredibly stupid things he knows Essek has done he will decide to judge him for this, but he cannot help the way his shoulders stiffen as he twists a little further to meet the gaze of the last link in their semicircle. “Yes?”

Caleb looks - focused, in an offhanded way, like he’s intent on something happening just slightly out of their current reality. Stunned might be a better word for it. He blinks for a moment before focusing those keen blue eyes somewhere near Essek’s eyebrows. “Ah - did you know that when you laugh, your ears -” He puts his hands up to his own ears and flaps them a little.

Drow do not run particularly warm, but that only makes it easier for Essek to feel the heat absolutely flood back into his face. “I-” he stammers. Nearly a century of politics is nowhere near enough to help him keep a straight face. “I - ah - eeh!-”

Caleb is close enough to reach out and run a questing fingertip over Essek’s left ear - it flicks wildly, trying to dislodge the unexpected tickle, but a surprised squeak still slips out.

There’s a moment of silence before Verin starts to snicker. “Oh, I like your friends,” he says merrily, beaming. “Go on, Light knows he doesn’t let himself laugh enough otherwise.”

“Don’t,” Essek gets out hastily, but Caleb is already reaching out for another go and Yasha’s grip is firm enough that all he can do is squeak again. “Wait - hm, hnn!”

Beau sidles up to Yasha’s side and gives him a self satisfied leer as she reaches out across their little group to pluck the feather from Fjord’s tricorn. “You got him, babe?”

“I do,” Yasha confirms and lets out a little squeak of her own as Beau reaches around her, no doubt squeezing something entirely inappropriate with company present.

“Hot,” Beau smirks, and reaches to flutter the feather over Essek’s right ear. “Aw, does that tickle? Thought you said you weren’t ticklish, man.”

Essek maintains some facsimile of composure for all of two seconds before his face crumples “Nnn - hehehe - eheehe - oh!”

His lungs are surely going to burst, with the way they’re shivering out desperate giggles as he shakes his head frantically between Caleb’s fingers and the teasing feather. He can’t move his arms, so he kicks his legs instead. “Please,” he begs, nearly incomprehensible even to his own ears. “Ah - aha, heeheehee! - tickles-”

Verin leans down and scoops his ankles up with one ridiculously sculpted arm. “Essek, you’re going to put a hole in someone with those boots.”

He looks up, raising his eyebrows teasingly, and Essek’s stomach drops like he’s cast something on it. “Here, I’ll fix that.”

Essek’s eyes, narrowed with laughter, shoot wide open. He doesn’t remember Verin being this evil - but then again, his brother’s never been egged on by five other people determined to render reports of his death more realistic.

“Verin, Verin, no-” he tries, but he’s giggling so hard that he can’t even get the words out. He twists as far away from Caleb and Beau as he can, flailing frantically, but Verin’s grip holds firm.

He pouts dramatically. “What? Is it my fault that my tiny, ticklish wizard brother insists on wearing metal-tipped boots that endanger everyone?”

Essek opens his mouth to reply and promptly dissolves into another frantic peal of laughter as Beau gets bored of his ears and shoves her feather in Caleb’s direction before jabbing a finger between his trapped arm and his chest to get at his armpit. “Your - shihihit, shit, ahahaaa, not there! - your arcanist brother is going to kill you just as soon as I can- hahaha!”

Verin just laughs, unlacing one of his boots and starting to slide it off. “Is that your attempt to convince me not to tickle your feet?”

Jester, practically vibrating, emits a sound that perhaps only weasels can hear. “Oh, that’s so cute! Can I have one of them?”

“One of his feet? Sure.” Verin hands over an ankle, grinning down at Jester. “You, I think you’re my favorite.”

As Essek gasps and struggles and falls further and further into a formless mirth that makes him feel so light he can hardly bear it, there’s a different sensation at his ear. A hazy portion of his brain identifies it as the rough bristle of chin scruff and an amused huff of breath.

“You don’t really want them to stop, do you,” Caleb murmurs. “I will help you, if you do.”

It’s quite unfair, Essek feels, to try and make him explain himself while he’s strung out and dizzy with laughter. He tries anyway, for a syllable or two, but Verin digs in between two of his toes and he ends up just tipping his cheek against Caleb’s and shaking, laughing too hard to make a single sound.

“Alright, then,” Caleb says. “In that case-”

He brandishes the feather with a flourish more suited to somatic casting, swooping it down the length of Essek’s nose before directing it back to his ear.

“Tickle, tickle...”

[morganaspendragonss]

Can you write a fic where Carlos is attacked while he is home alone and TK comes home after a shift and finds him super badly hurt?

holly's august extravaganza day 31: scars turn to memories

thank you anon! who else isn't ready for it to be september yet? i'm certainly not 😅 a masterlist will be coming out tomorrow with all fics listed. thanks so much for everyone's support this month, and i hope you enjoy this final fic (for august)!

thanks to @halsteadmarchs for the beta!

ao3 | 1.5k | angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, major character injury, knife violence

There’s someone in their bedroom.

TK is stuck in the doorway, just watching as the love of his life is brutally attacked in their bed, in their home. He tries to shout, to move, to do anything, but some invisible force is pinning him in place, making him a mere spectator to the horror show in front of him.

Carlos’s head rolls on the pillow, his eyes instantly alighting on TK. His lips move, though the only sound that comes out is a wet gurgle, followed by blood spilling from his mouth and down his chin. Tears drip hot down TK’s cheeks as he sees the desperation in Carlos’s expression, which soon morphs into confusion and then betrayal as TK doesn’t save him.

He can’t—he can’t—and he’s trying but the light is starting to fade in Carlos’s eyes and he’s dying, he’s dead, and TK still can’t move, he—

He wakes with a gasp, sitting bolt upright in bed. His heart is pounding and his face feels tight with drying tears, trembles wracking his entire body as the dream replays all too vividly in his mind. He’s been having the same one since that night four months ago, when he’d arrived home from shift to find Carlos…

To find him…

TK shakes his head, trying to shove the memories from his mind, but it’s a lost cause. He presses the heel of his hand hard into his eyes, but he can’t stop the tidal wave from rising up and claiming him, dragging him back into a waking version of his nightmare.

*

Their front door is open. It’s wide open, and the wood of the door frame is broken, splinters littering the driveway and the floor of the front room. TK’s heart stops in his chest as he surveys the scene, his brain going blank, struggling to comprehend what he’s seeing.

He takes a tentative step forward and peers into the darkness, slowly sliding his phone out of his pocket with a thumb on the home button, ready to call 911 at the slightest sign of movement.

Everything is quiet in the front room, not even a table setting out of place. TK creeps further into their home, his every nerve on edge as he barely breathes for fear of alerting whoever’s here of his presence.

And then—

Carlos.

TK barely remembers to be quiet as he rushes to the stairs, desperately praying that the intruder has left Carlos alone. He knows that Carlos is more than capable of defending himself, but he would have been in bed, maybe asleep and definitely alone; TK doesn’t want to imagine what might have happened to him.

But, as it turns out, he doesn’t have to. TK stops dead in the doorway to their bedroom, all the breath knocked out of him as he takes in the sight before him.

The room is a mess, lamps knocked to the floor, the bed in disarray, and dark stains cover their sheets.

And on the floor, spread-eagled in a pool of blood, lies Carlos, and TK feels his world crumble.

*

His hands won’t stop shaking. TK grips onto the kitchen counter as he waits for the coffee pot to finish and closes his eyes, breathing carefully. It’s like the anxiety started when he first caught sight of the open front door and then never left, latching onto him and growing like a weed.

He hasn’t really had a good day in months, but it seems like today is going to be an especially bad one. Nausea climbs up the back of his throat as he remembers the sensation of Carlos’s blood on his hands, sticky and warm and there was so much of each, every bandage he pressed to a wound being soaked through in seconds.

His body is almost bent in two, his forehead pressed against the counter as the panic of that night returns in full force, almost choking him. TK gasps, his entire body trembling, before he loses his grip and crashes to the floor, the sobs that have been building in his chest since the moment he woke up finally letting loose.

*

“Carlos! Carlos, baby, stay with me, please, please.”

TK blinks back tears as his shaking hands hold another bandage to one of Carlos’s many wounds, crying out in despair as it quickly turns red. It was his last one, and now he’s down to grabbing anything he can find to attempt to staunch the ever-increasing blood flow.

He thinks the 911 operator on the phone with him is trying to calm him down, maybe, but TK stopped listening a long time ago. His training has been the only thing keeping him focused; if he had to just sit here helplessly, TK thinks he would have lost his mind by now, though it can’t have been more than five minutes since he found Carlos.

TK knows, in the back of his mind, that it’s a miracle Carlos is still breathing. There’s so much blood… No-one can lose that much and be okay. They’re on borrowed time, every second of delay in getting Carlos to a hospital increasing the likelihood that he won’t make it out of this.

“Come on,” he begs, pressing down harder, as if he can force the life back into his husband. “Don’t die, please don’t die, not now.”

But his pleas are in vain; Carlos’s breath stutters and rattles, and then stops altogether.

A second later, the room is bathed in blue and red as the wail of sirens heralds the arrival of help.

*

He comes out of the flashback with a gasp, finding himself curled into a ball on the kitchen floor. TK sits up with a groan, resting his head against the cupboards and tries to figure out how to breathe again.

One, two, three, four, five, in through the nose.

One, two, three, four, five, out through the mouth.

One, two, three, four—

One, two—

One—

It’s pointless.

TK forces himself to his feet, chest still tight with anxiety, and staggers to the couch. He collapses onto it and stares sightlessly at the wall in front of him. It’s still mostly dark outside, only the barest slivers of light entering through the windows, and TK wishes he could go back to sleep.

He won’t try—he’s too scared of the nightmares for that—but he’s so tired. He hasn’t slept properly since that night; is one night without feeling his husband’s life ebb away under his own hands really too much to ask?

Is it too much to want just a few hours of peace to pretend that reality doesn’t exist?

*

“I can’t lose him, Dad,” TK whispers, curled in on himself in the waiting room of the hospital.

His dad rests a hand on the back of his neck, fingers gently brushing TK’s hair, but it brings little comfort. Usually, his dad’s hugs and gentle reassurances would work miracles—even after their house burned down, when TK was furious at him, he couldn’t deny that it calmed him, just for a moment, to relax in his dad’s embrace.

But now… Now, TK doesn’t think there’s anything in the world that could make him feel better.

He has no clear memories from the moment paramedics swarmed the house; all he can remember is the pain and dread as they worked on Carlos, the fear as TK gripped onto his husband’s hand in the ambulance, unable to stand the thought that this could be it.

“I can’t,” he continues, shaking his head. “I don’t—I won’t survive it.”

“We’ll get through this, son.” His dad squeezes TK’s neck gently, then moves his hand to rub circles on his back. “We will.”

But all TK can think is how grateful he is that his dad didn’t say something stupid, like “It’ll be okay.”

Because it won’t.

Nothing will, anymore.

*

A silhouette steps into TK’s line of sight, and then he’s being lifted, his body pliant to the shadow’s ministrations. He’s resettled against a strong chest, arms wrapping around him and a kiss landing on the top of his head.

“Did you dream about it again?” Carlos murmurs, rubbing a thumb over TK’s knuckles. The gesture is soothing, and it does more to loosen the knot in TK’s chest than anything else could.

He nods wordlessly, sitting up and raising a hand to Carlos’s cheek. The raised scar tissue is barely visible in this half-light but TK feels it clearly as he brushes his fingertips over the mark. His hand drifts down Carlos’s neck and to his chest, where even more scars litter his skin, and TK’s heart aches—but then, something incredible happens.

Carlos smiles.

He fucking smiles, his eyes understanding and sad and maybe a little haunted, but it’s full of love; the same love TK feels for him.

And it’s the most beautiful thing in the world.

TK kisses him gently, briefly pressing their foreheads together before burrowing closer into his husband, his ear pressed to Carlos’s chest. And his heart is beating, strong and steady, just like it always has.

And everything is going to be okay.

[queerdiaz]

KJ's Buddie Fic Masterpost

Complete:

Texts Between Dumbass & Dumbasser (+Friends)-

[From: TK] FINE then I'll just have to create my own podcast talking about two people named Puck and Freddie who are best friends who work together and are secretly in love with each other but neither of them know it

[From: Buck] you wouldn't dare

[From: TK] try me bitch

______

OR

After the Wildfires, Buck and TK begin to text each other and chaos ensues. Which largely consists of TK trying to convince Buck that he and Eddie need to get together already for everyone's sakes.

10/10 Chapters. Buck and TK friendship. Buddie and Tarlos. Ensamble characters.

can you keep me close (can you love me most)-

Set post 4x14. Buck is having a nice movie night with his Diaz boys that turns into Eddie falling asleep on Buck's lap, stirring feelings.

One-shot. Prompt filled. Buckley family feels. Getting together.

WIP's That I Want To Continue To Work On:

Domestic Illusion-

Eddie had an idea. An absolutely terrible, ridiculous idea that he'd never in a million years would allow himself to even think about, let alone say it out loud. 

And yet.

----

Post S4 Finale. A few months after what happened to Eddie, Buck is still staying at the Diaz household when Eddie's parents come to town for a visit. In a moment of overwhelmed weakness, he blurts out about his change in the will which makes them obviously upset. Worried about his grandparents' reactions, Christopher gives his dad a very... interesting idea about Buck and Eddie.

It couldn't work. Could it?

Chapters: 2/?.

i don't want to talk about it (tell me where it hurts)-

The older man looked back up toward Eddie. "You seem more annoyed than usual. Why is that?"

"Because," Eddie began to say, drawing out the word in exasperation, "I already told you. I'm worried about Buck."

---

Post 4x14. Eddie is going to mandatory therapy. However, instead on focusing on his own issues he can't help but be worried about Buck. When Frank makes a suggestion, it leads to some truths to finally come out as Buck and Eddie begin to heal together.

Recovery fic. Therapy fic. Chapters: 1/3.

A Family Is What You Make It-

Set after 4x10. Struggling with the changes in his relationship with his Diaz boys as Eddie gets more serious with Ana, Buck gets news that changes his life forever.

Slowburn. Family fic. Buddie. Tarlos.

WIP's That Are Discontinued For The Time Being

the universe is screaming at you (but you refuse to listen)-

Everyone in Eddie's life seems to believe in the Universe™. Especially his best friend and son. But Eddie? Eddie has issues with a capital "I" when it comes to the universe. But he's okay with keeping that (mostly) to himself. Especially when it comes to his son, Christopher.

Things start to change, however, when Chris mentions a certain something about the universe that has to do with Eddie and his best friend, Buck.

Set some time after "Breaking Point". Chapters: 1/?.

you can ebb and I can flow (and we'll grow as we go)

This was a terrible idea. 

An absurdly idiotic terrible idea. 

Yet in retrospect, Eddie really should've seen this coming. 

----

A classic What If Buck and Eddie hooked up after 2x01 and secretly continues to do so every now and then as their friendship continues to grow more and more into a unshakable bond, even as their pesky feelings for each other grow as well.

Follows canon events but with my own twist. Chapters: 1/?

let go and unleash all the feelings-

Buck wanted to so desperately close his eyes and wake up from this hellish nightmare and go to work and see the mirth in his best friend's eyes as he found something to tease Buck about.

But no, this was very real, since the way Eddie was looking at him pierced through his very bones and soul.

----

Yet another angsty post 4x13 fic. You're welcome.

Songfic based off "The Other Side" by Ruelle. Chapters: 1/?.

Series:

Tales Between Dumbass & Dumbasser + Friends-

Which consists of:

Texts Between Dumbass & Dumbasser (+Friends) - as previously mentioned

The Adventures of Puck and Freddie-

Spinoff of Texts Between Dumbass and Dumbasser where to help TK feel better Buck and Eddie make a podcast to dramatically tell the story of two idiot best friend firefighters who fell in love.

Crack. Complete crack.

Chats Between Dumbass Firefam and Dumbasser Firefam-

Sequel Texts Between Dumbass and Dumbasser (+ Friends). After TK accidentally spills the beans that Buck and Eddie may or not be together, the new couple has to deal with the ramifications of keeping it from them.

Enter: more groupchat shenanigans, more characters, and just absolutely more chaos in general.

[grittyreadsfic]

hello my friends, one singular person asked for this weeks ago so i’m here with my most unhinged rec list yet: tk and nolan.

now, this one was hard to reign in, so i really didn’t. this pairing had maybe 230 fics in the tag when i first started reading hockey fic, and it’s now over 900, and i’ve read far too many of them, and that makes it so hard to parse it down. so i just...didn't!

so with that said, please enjoy so you want to get into tknp: a beginners guide to a classic case of idiots to lovers

i told myself that i couldn’t rec an author’s entire body of work but then i remembered this is my blog and i do what i want, so i did some consolidating. here’s a list of the quintessential authors for this pairing, you can start at any of their profiles and pick any of their fics at random, and it’ll be one of the best ones for the pairing, hands down.

therainbowsedge: i’d start with the summer camp fic, or the sex toys one, as both beautifully capture the true idiots to lovers nature of this pairing, but just top tier writing all around

manybumblebees: the wedding fic is so tender and port stanley is a classic, but literally pick any single fic and you’ll have a perfect tknp fic. i’m not kidding

jamesvanriemsdick: their tknp fics in their series are some of the hidden gems of this pairing (the tk heartbeat fic makes me LOSE it) but the delaware fic or the seattle fic…..there’s really something for every mood

catchascatchcan: start with era of gods because i could write literal essays on how it’s some of the best fantasy worldbuilding i’ve ever read, but then just read everything else on their account, including non tknp fics. you won’t regret it

hackysack: ao3 user hackysack has written one of two timeloop fics that i absolutely adore, and i thought about just calling that one out in particular, but all of their work deserves the attention

canary: nothing to prove was the first tknp fic i ever read and i was immediately hooked. all of their fics are a good starting place for the pairing, and just really give you a feeling for the pairing

and now, for the fic recs!

to be, despite it all by smudgedfreckles

summary: or, nolan patrick’s gender thesis, by travis konecny.

why i love it: there’s not a lot ofo nonbinary characters in media, even in fic, but this fic’s treatment of nolan and their path to figuring out their gender just feels so real and made me feel so seen. tk’s characterization is also just top notch, and it’s just a super sweet story about two people who love each other

last ones standing by makeit_takeit

summary: If you’re committed to finding your future spouse, reads the last line of the ad, and are ready to look at yourself and your love life in a whole new way, apply now.

At the bottom of the ad there’s a link, and Travis finds his finger hovering over the screen, lip still caught between his teeth.

“I mean,” he says very reasonably, speaking out loud to his empty apartment like some sort of possibly-crazy person, “just applying doesn’t mean anything. Maybe I just fill it out, and see what happens. It’s not like I’m really gonna get picked to be on TV, come on.”

He snorts out loud, just to show his apartment he hasn’t lost his grip on reality or anything; he fully understands how ludicrous that would be.

Then he clicks the link anyway, because yolo or whatever.

why i love it: what part of a married at first sight fic doesn’t make you want to immediately dive right in? the concept is fun, the execution is absolutely flawless, and it captures their dynamic so well while letting it develop naturally

motivation by connectknee

summary: Kevin knows when to back off, the article said. He knows just when to shut up and leave Patty alone, something Travis has never known how to do.

why i love it: the thing i love about this pairing is that tk is loud and in your face, and nolan’s more reserved, a little quieter, a little harder to read. this fic does a really great job of exploring how tk could feel like maybe he’s just a bit too much and is one of my favorites in terms of miscommunication

a tenderness grows by rusesdeguerre

summary: Nolan wouldn’t say that landing a job as the Philadelphia Flyers’ psychotic and probably clinically insane mascot was a childhood dream of his. Maybe tangentially: playing pond hockey in –30°C weather and pretending to be Sidney Crosby is practically a rite of passage when you grow up in Manitoba. That, and experiencing the distinct displeasure that is thousands of mosquitoes sucking your blood out when your father drags you on a father-son camping trip into the backwoods of the northern Canadian Prairies.

why i love it: this was the first fic i recced on this blog, and i stand by that decision. a fic where nolan is not only not a hockey player, but is in fact the person in the gritty suit? absolutely perfect, and so charming from start to finish

meet me at my window by springsteen

summary: Travis has lived in Philadelphia for a few years now, long enough to know there isn’t a major city in America where superheroes don’t destroy an entire city block trying to save humanity or whatever. He can deal with all the super-shit, but Travis did not sign up for getting woken up from a deep sleep because some fucker’s trying to break in through his window.

(5 times the super-villain known as "The Cat" breaks into Travis's apartment, plus 1 time Travis invites him in.)

why i love it: there’s a lot of things to love here, but the concept is just absolutely one of my all time favorite aus ever. it’s fun and charming and the perfect glimpse into a world where heroes and villains exist, and what it’s like just to be a run of the mill kind of guy existing in it. tk and nolan’s back and forth in this make it so engaging, and it’s such a top tier fic

body’s in trouble by cloudsandpassingevents

summary: “Oh, sorry,” someone says. “Didn’t know anyone else was here.”

Nolan freezes, then turns around very slowly. When he looks up, Nicklas fucking Backstrom is standing behind him in a hoodie and baggy sweats, holding the biggest bag of Swedish Fish Nolan’s ever seen in his life in one hand.

“Uh,” Nolan says around the pop tart between his teeth. “Yeah.”

What the fuck, his brain helpfully supplies.

why i love it: from nolan’s inner voice, to the way the author explores all the dynamics within the team, to the way they write the unexpected but actually, it kind of makes sense friendship between nolan and backstrom, is just absolutely fantastic. there’s a lot of moments that circle back and build on each other in a way that really just makes it super compelling

rhizomatic foundations by lighthousetowers

summary: Twenty days after he moves in with Kevin Hayes, twenty days – three months, five months, depending on how you look at it – after not talking to TK, TK shows up at the front door with a plant the size of a basketball in his hands.

TK grins. "Patty, meet Reginald." He lifts up the plant. "Reggie, meet Patty. He's going to be your new - caretaker."

"What the fuck," says Nolan, not moving a single muscle.

Or: That Nolan can hear the plant talk might as well just happen.

why i love it: this is probably my favorite magical realism fic just about ever. it’s fun and charming and a little weird, but in the best possible way. there’s such a wonderful narrative in it, and lighthousetowers always has such beautiful writing, and it really shines in this one. the dialogue and nolan’s characterization are also part of what set it apart for me as one of the best tknp fics

in the dark of any town by mengetpegged

summary: If the voice has an accent at all, it’s a flat prairie Canadian, with none of G’s French-Canadian softness at the edges. But mostly, the accent is just ‘pissed off,’ which TK believes is a default setting for ghosts.

“Who are you?” TK asks, and he doesn’t like how strained his voice sounds, doesn’t like the tinge of anxiety tinting the rise of his question. He tries to regulate his breaths—in through his nose, hold, out through his mouth—but it feels like he’s not getting enough oxygen, which makes him panic even more.

“Someone with a fucking migraine, dickhead,” the voice says. “So keep the lights off and shut the hell up.”

(or: Nolan Patrick, Hotel X Ghost)

why i love it: i’m usually not super into ghost fics, both the spooky kind and the nonspooky kind, but this one is a rare exception. it’s charming and fun and tender and it’s got some of, in my opinion, the best characterization of tk and nolan in any fic. the way the author writes their dynamic and their dialogue is just unmatched

lets_make_this_moment_a_crime.mp3 by honeydripping

summary: Travis meets Nolan at a Midtown show in 2002 when he punches Nolan in the face. He can’t help it, “Like A Movie” just goes off.

But he does feel guilty about it.

or

TK and Patty work at a bakery together. They go to punk shows to pass the time.

why i love it: idk if anyone asked for an early 2000s emo/punk/alt au but wow! i sure am glad it exists! really the vibes of this fic, as silly as that sounds, are absolutely unmatched. i love the structure with the music, the development of their relationship, and just everything about how the author wrote the setting (there’s this whole thing with tattoos in it that makes me feel absolutely insane)

you’re ripped at every edge by you’re a masterpiece by conformityissuicide

summary: “Ugh, look, this yoga teacher has it out for me, man. And I can’t go back there without at least having some of the basics down. I’ve got to win this battle.”

“Yoga isn’t really something you win at,” Hartsy starts.

Travis cuts him off, “You can win at anything if you try hard enough.”

+++

OR that time Nolan's a grumpy yoga teacher and Travis realizes he wants to bone him and prove him wrong about Travis' non-existent yoga abilities.

why i love it: listen, if you want tknp, at least one of them has to be an idiot, and this tk absolutely captures the obliviousness i love to see in him in fic. it’s such a great characterization of them both and such a great concept (and even better execution)

you form a terror pack (and i’m aware of that) by dalmatienne

summary: “Can I help you?” TK snarks, both eyebrows hiked up in a way that has earned her many elbow checks to the ribs.

The chick looks down her nose, long thick eyelashes fluttering. Red-bitten lips part to blow a florid pink bubble and TK can smell the chemical sweetness when it pops.

“Yeah,” she says in this monotonous voice that seems almost at odds with her bubble gum and neon skates. She jams her stopper into TK’s thigh again, literally inches away from where it’d really hurt. “Tie ‘em.”

why i love it: to be honest, i generally don’t read rule 63 within hrpf, but this one is just absolutely knocks it out of the park. the concept (i fuckin’ love roller derby), the characterization of nolan, the pacing, the rituals, the tone of the entire fic, it’s just all around a perfect read from start to finish

thrills and grills by bitter_leaf

summary: Travis can’t even begin to wonder what he did in a previous life to incur the wrath of this fucking cook. Travis thinks he’s a nice person, doesn’t conduct himself in any way that could be considered particularly dickish, and unless this guy has some sort of issue with hockey bros or people from the boonies, he’s not sure how he started shit without even knowing.

__

Patty has a vendetta. Travis just wants to eat his eggs in peace.

why i love it: honestly this is the enemies to lovers fic i’ve been waiting for. i remember seeing the reddit post when it first went viral and thinking it would make such a great fic premise, so stumbling across this one was just so wonderful. super engaging and fun and so hilarious to read!

nothing but room for you by fightingfuries

summary: When his agent tells him he’s going to be traded to the Devils, Nolan isn't sure how he feels about it. Might be easier if he was going somewhere farther away, like California or fucking Florida. Somewhere sun-soaked and foreign. Someplace so different from Philadelphia that he can forget he ever played for the Flyers, forget everything that happened there.

Or Nolan fucks up, gets traded, gets his shit together and falls in love. Not necessarily in that order.

why i love it: i cannot stress to you how much i love trade fics, and this one is one of my absolute favorites. the trade to the devils-so close to philly, still, but there’s more to distance than physical miles-was such an excellent choice and the split timeline adds so much to the narrative, and the emotions are real and messy and complicated in the best way

a couple of runaways (i’m glad you stayed) by overturnedgoal

summary: The person in the video he’s watching is super annoying. Some obnoxious holier than thou granola type who keeps talking about their environmental impact as if they aren’t driving a gas guzzler around, but the basic idea of living in a van, driving around wherever, camping all the time, just going hiking and swimming and seeing the whole country? It sounds pretty dope, honestly.

why i love it: i like to watch tours and conversions of vans/buses into tiny homes as a self soothing method, and this fic has the same impact that watching those do. it’s such a fun concept, and it’s so fuckin’ soft, and the dialouge between tk and nolan is just *chef’s kiss*

all candor and style in the crook of your smile by p3trichor

summary: It’s a photo of Nolan on his knees with someones’ fingers in his mouth, lips slick with spit. Travis flicks by it almost too fast and he’s only got seconds to decide if he wants to screenshot it, if he wants to just give up the ghost right then and there. Except Travis’s phone freezes momentarily and then the group refreshes, sidcros87, Bert59 and 14 others took a screenshot!

It’s gone before Travis even has time to process it and he already wasted his replay of the day on a stupid video of a stupid fish that Hayes caught.

Can you send me that screenshot Travis texts Bertuzzi before he can overthink it, his dick already stirring in his sweats. Tuzzi sends back the cry-laughing emoji and then the screenshot before Travis can be too annoyed at him.

Or, Nolan is being weird about Travis's break-up and TK is maybe not straight.

why i love it: i genuinely don’t think i have words for the amount i love this fic. it took me forever to actually read, but it’s absolutely one of my favorite fics, and it’s an absolutely riot to read. carter’s meddling and the presence of tyler bertuzzi both make it extra fun, in my humble opinion

[buckybarnesalways]

come to bed

warnings: slight smut

characters: tk and Carlos

@trkstrnd @mycurlyboobear @sneetchestoo @ladyate @snufflesandfluff @buckleymanes @bellakitse @reyeslonestar @littleelisabeth @idostufflikeexist @blakestrand126 @morganaspendragonss @fics-to-read-on-here @lundya366 @marjansmarwani @lire-casander

It had been weeks since Tk had been able to see his boyfriend. Ever since the suspension was lifted, Carlos had been working himself into the ground. Tk knew he was trying to prove to everyone that he was good enough to do his job, no matter how many times he had told carlos that he didn't need to prove anything to anyone, that he was an amazing police officer.

Tk sighed and flopped over onto his bed, shoving his folded pillow under his head and scrunching his eyes closed. He was desperately willing himself to fall asleep but the growing problem between his legs seemed to make it impossible. He groaned and flipped onto his back stretching himself completely across his bed. Yes he missed Carlos for more than just sex but right now, especially this late at night. all he could think of was Carlos and his hands on his body. An involuntary shudder rippled through him at just the thought.

Looking over towards his nightstand, the glowing red numbers on his alarm clock revealed that it was three in the morning. He knew his love would be asleep and he didn't wanna wake him but he couldn't take it anymore. He let out a dramatic sigh and reluctantly reached for his phone. He pressed the call icon next to Carlos’ name and waited. He was surprised when he heard the beautiful voice on the other end answer after only two rings.

"What are you doing?'' he asked, trying to mask the arousal in his voice.

He should have known that he couldn't hide his feelings from the other man. Carlos answered back in a deep voice,

"I was actually thinking about you and how much I miss you."

"Hmmmm is that all you're thinking?" about tk all but purred back.

He could hear the grin in carlos’ voice when he answered back, "Oh definitely not, baby, I was thinking about the way I can make you crazy with just the touch of a hand."

Tk closed his eyes and moaned as his hand traveled down to the waistband of his boxers.

"Ty, babe, you can't make sounds like that when I can't touch you." Carlos said in a clenched voice.

Tk smiled to himself as he pictured carlos’ frustrated face.

"Hmmmm baby i wish it was you touching me." Tk said.

Carlos groaned, setting his laptop on the nightstand and sinking down lower into his bed, " Baby, do you know what you're doing to me?" he asked.

"I wish I was there with you." Tk said in a whisper.

Carlos felt a pang of guilt settle in the pit of his stomach. He hated making Tk think that his job was more important than spending time with him. Fun times forgotten, Tk covered himself with the thick weighted blanket Carlos had bought for him after they realized Tk couldn't sleep if Carlos wasn't draped across him (the blanket helped somewhat). He heard the tired sniffle and his heart broke.

"You know that I'm not trying to stay away from you right?" Carlos asked.

" I just feel like you don't want to look at me since everything that happened and I hate that you feel like it's your fault…" Tk replied.

"Wait. Who told you I blame myself? " Carlos questioned, sitting up straighter in bed.

"No one had to tell me, I can tell by the way you won't even look at me let alone touch me…" tk sighed, "i just miss you, Carlos."

"Ty, it's not you, every time i see you all i can think about is how i failed you, i didn't keep you safe and i’m sor……" Carlos started to say.

" No please don't apologise. You're not to blame, I need you to know that no matter what anyone says, what happened isn't on you, if it weren't for you we may never have been found." Tk said in earnest. " You did that, you saved us, saved me, I knew you would, there was never any doubt."

Carlos grinned, " Well I'm glad one of us believed in me then…" he quietly answered.

" I always believe in you." Tk replied back just as quietly.

Carlos sighed, " what are we doing, Ty. You're so far away."

" Come over, I miss you being here with me." Tk said in a rush.

" Baby I don't think your dad is gonna want to be in the same house as us with the things I wanna do to you." Carlos answered.

"Ok then I'm coming over." Tk responded.

" Wait now, Ty, it's 4:00 in the morning."

Carlos waited for the other man to answer him but was met with silence.

" Tyler Kennedy, you better not be on your way over here." He grumbled as he set his phone on the bed next to him.

About thirty minutes later he had started to doze off, when he was jolted awake by the slight dip of the mattress next to him.

" Hi there, sleeping beauty!" Tk joked, running a soothing hand across his cheek.

"Babe? what….?" Carlos stuttered out.

"What? Did you not think I was serious about coming over?" Tk asked laughing.

With a groan, Carlos reached out wrapping his arms around Tks waist, pulling him down against him.

" Honestly I thought you were joking but now that you're here…" Carlos answered leaning over, capturing Tks mouth with his own.

Tk kissed back fervently, one of his hands landing on Carlos' hip and the other traveling to the back of his neck trying to pull him in closer. Clothes were thrown around the room as they melted into each other. Both of them desperate to show the other just how much love they possessed for the other one.

[marjansmarwani]

would’ve loved you for a lifetime

Tarlos || 7.6k || ao3

Prompt: Characters are secretly married and one of them is hurt at work 

-----

The story of how TK and Carlos came together, and how they almost missed out on their future before it even got a chance to start.

For the wonderful @acejuddryder on her birthday! I hope you enjoy this AC and that you have a day as good as you deserve 💕

I came across this prompt a while ago and @bellakitse encouraged me to write it and I am so glad she did! I have been wanting to do a non-linear narrative for a while, and this worked perfectly for that. Shoutouts to both @officereyes and @firefighterstrand for helping me with bits and editing for me, you’re champs 🥰

--------

Judd watched as TK went about repacking the first aid kit with a smile on his face, humming to himself. This had been going on for the majority of their 24-hour shift now and in hour 23, Judd’s patience was finally up. 

“Okay kid, what gives? You’ve been grinning like the butcher’s dog all shift.” 

TK glanced up from his work, startled, “I have not.” 

“Yeah, you have dude,” Marjan informed him as she tossed him more supplies, “want to fill us in?” 

“It’s not just today either,” Paul noted, coming around from the other side of the engine, “you’ve been suspiciously chipper for a few days now.” 

“Can’t a guy just be happy without getting the third degree? Jeez.” 

“There’s happy, and then there’s this.” 

“You too Mateo, really? I thought you had my back, man.” 

“Don’t guilt-trip the probie,” Paul admonished, throwing his polishing rag at TK for emphasis, “just tell us what’s up.” 

TK was saved the trouble of dodging the question by the sound of his phone ringing in his pocket. 

“Saved by the bell,” he declared as he fished it out of his pocket and stepped to the back of the rig for some semblance of privacy. 

“Don’t count on it lasting,” Judd called after him, “we’re getting right back into this as soon as you are done.” 

The others returned to their tasks, eager to finish with the end of their shift in sight. Their focus was soon broken by the sound of a gasp and a clattering sound from where TK stood. They all looked over to see TK, standing on the other side of the engine bay, expression stricken and body trembling. 

“TK?” Paul asked hesitantly but got no response. Not even an indication that their teammate had heard him. They crossed over as a group but Judd got there first and reached down to grab the abandoned phone. The call was still going. He watched as Marjan approached TK, comforting hands reaching for his and Paul reminded him to breathe in his even, calming voice as he lifted the abandoned phone to his ear.

“Hello?” 

“Mr. Strand?” 

“No, this is his friend. He seems to be...a little out of sorts right now.” 

The voice on the other end sighed, “that’s understandable. Would you please just inform him that his husband should be heading into surgery shortly and that he should check in upon his arrival so that the doctor can give him an update?” 

Husband? Judd was so stuck on that word he almost missed the rest of the sentence. He managed to unfreeze his brain long enough to answer, “Of course, I’ll make sure he gets there. What hospital?” 

“St. David’s.” 

“Thank you.” 

Judd hung up the phone and stared at it for a moment. He felt the eyes of the team on him but he took a steadying breath before he looked up. When he did he ignored the curious gazes of the others and looked directly at TK, “they said I should tell you that your husband should be heading into surgery shortly, and that you should check-in when you get there so a doctor can update you.” 

TK nodded, but said nothing else. No explanation, no objection that they were wrong; that he didn’t have a husband. 

Because as far as Judd had known as of a few minutes ago, he didn’t. 

“I need to go,” TK finally said and his voice was so pained it almost hurt to hear, “I need to get there.” 

“I hate to break it to you man,” Paul said gently, “but you are in no shape to drive right now.” 

“I’ll take him.” 

The words were out of his mouth before he had even fully processed them. But when the eyes of the team fell to him, he repeated them: “I’ll take him. Clear it with Cap?” 

The others nodded and he hoped they had picked up on what was left unsaid: tell Owen that he apparently has a son-in-law he doesn’t know about; tell the Captain that TK is a wreck but that Judd had him. 

“There’s only a bit of shift left, we should be able to hold down the fort. Go, and keep us updated.” 

Judd nodded at Paul and the others before reaching out a hand to put on TK’s shoulder, “C’mon kid, let’s go.” 

His voice and guiding hand were gentle, and TK barely nodded before allowing himself to be led out of the station and to Judd’s truck. He climbed into the passenger seat silently and didn’t utter a word for the whole drive. All Judd could do was shoot him concerned glances and try to push back all the unanswered questions in his mind. Now was not the time for answers —his one and only concern was making sure TK was okay. The rest could come later. 

----------

They started on a Tuesday. 

As things went it wasn’t a particularly notable day for a beginning, but there wasn’t much notable about their start. 

They were two people colliding; contrasting desires meeting in the in between, in the common ground. They wanted different ends but the means suited them both just fine. It was hot and heavy; it was rough and quick. It was needy and physical and everything they wanted (if only for a moment). 

Then eventually, it was more. 

Not at first —it wasn’t more for a long time. For months it was just blowing off steam, just mind blowing sex. There were a few dates of varying success, but they continued their dance around each other and the feelings they both had. Then TK got shot and they both watched their potential future teetering on the edge, ready to topple over with the weight of uncertainty. Eventually TK woke up to the chaos of adjusting to life again and a solar storm, and in the quiet that followed the chaos they found themselves in each other. 

From there it was simple: after the start they had it couldn’t be anything but. In all that time they had gotten to know each without really meaning to and now they found themselves fitting together like a pair of gloves; fine on their own, but infinitely better together. They slipped into rhythms like they did embraces, and they were happy. 

They dedicated time to getting to know what they were without an audience and without really realizing it, they had become a secret. A badly kept one, but a secret none-the-less. They existed in the peripherals, their life together a separate entity from their lives as seen by the rest of the world. 

From the outskirts they became TK and Carlos and as time went on, there was less and less space between their bodies, their names, and their hearts. 

And with each passing Tuesday, they grew closer. 

---------

Judd kept stealing glances at TK. 

They were in the waiting room of the hospital, and TK had spent every moment since they sat down anxiously bouncing his leg while he fiddled with the necklace he always wore. 

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay.” 

“You don’t know that Judd.”

His voice was strained and quiet, so unlike the TK Judd was used to. He followed his gaze to the door the nurse had informed them the doctor would be coming through to give TK an update. That was nearly 10 minutes ago and TK’s eyes hadn’t left the door once. 

Judd had so many questions but wasn’t sure how to broach the topic. How do you ask your friend about a spouse you didn’t know they had when they are full of fear of losing them? 

He was saved the trouble of trying when TK spoke beside him, “I know what you’re thinking, just go ahead and ask.” 

His voice was resigned and Judd felt bad for even thinking about the question, but he did need to know. 

“You have a husband. Is it...someone we know?” 

TK pulled his glance away from the door long enough to glance at Judd. After a moment, he nodded: “Carlos.” 

“How long?” 

“Not long.” 

“Are you…” he began, but trailed off. He wasn’t sure what to ask. He had been leaning towards “happy,” but that seemed wrong in this context.  He didn’t know what the right thing to say was;  he had no idea how to approach this situation. He wished Grace was here. She was so much better at this kind of stuff.

They were quiet again until TK spoke, “I love him Judd.” 

The admission was made quietly, TK’s voice low and sad. Judd turned to look at him and TK met his eyes as he continued, “I need him in my life. I don’t know what I’d do without him. I can’t lose him, Judd.” 

Judd swallowed as he studied TK’s expression. It was full of a familiar fear; one that he had felt anytime he thought about the mere idea of losing Grace. He reached out a hand and gave TK’s shoulder a comforting squeeze. He knew better to promise that it would be alright — they had no way of knowing that. Instead he settled on a truth he knew. 

“You’ll get through this,” he told TK firmly, “and you won’t be alone.” 

--------

Time passed and they began to learn the mysteries of each other past the physical. Before TK knew just the spot to kiss to make Carlos moan each and every time, now he could tell you the name of his childhood dog and that when he was 5, he had wanted to be an astronaut. 

Carlos still knew all the ways to make TK melt under his touch but now he also knew how TK had pushed himself in the fire academy so he could feel worthy of the legacy of being the legendary Owen Strand’s son. Their secrets emerged from the shadows into open hearts, more and more revealing themselves with each passing day.

Stolen hours became endless evenings and frantic hookups became languid movie nights. Time passed and they began to feel at home with each other. Soon it became normal for TK to show up at Carlos’s home at the end of his shift as it slowly became more of a home to him. But, then again, the person who lived there was starting to feel an awful lot like home too. 

Their connection was generally known; they weren’t trying to sneak around. But while seeing them dancing at the bar or grabbing lunch at a food truck became more and more commonplace, the depth of their relationship was still a secret from most —including them, for a time. Michelle likely knew, Paul surely suspected; but the fact that they were falling more and more in love each passing day was a surprise to even them. 

It was TK who said it first; in a casual moment without a second thought. Carlos nearly tripped over his own feet when he heard it, but it had been like a dam breaking and soon it became commonplace, almost like breathing for them both. 

Time went on and their love grew. Time went on and they grew together —learning each other's edges and finding out where they fit. They were a puzzle, slowly coming together until the right piece was found. From there, it was a quick solve before the final picture revealed itself. 

And what a picture it was, Carlos thought to himself as he lay in his bed, watching TK sleeping soundly beside him. There were times he had to stop himself from reaching out to touch him, to make sure he was real. Sleep didn’t come easily to the other man and once it was found it was easily lost, so Carlos refrained, allowing his gaze to do the work for him. After everything he could scarcely believe they were here, after everything he couldn’t believe that they had found each other.  

These were his favorite nights, he decided. The ones where he got to fall asleep to the sight of TK beside him, the nights he was lulled to sleep by the sound of his breathing. He knew he wanted more nights like this — really, he wanted every night to be like this. 

But it was too soon for that, so for now he would savor the nights they had.

[continue reading on ao3]

[oabf45]

Ok so I finally watched the new 9-1-1 and 9-1-1 Lone Star episodes and here is what I think overall for the seasons so far, the characters, and part 2 of the seasons. Badically my opinions no one asked for 😁

9-1-1

- Let's rip the band aid off. I'm sorry but we're never getting Buddie. I'm a huge Buddie shipper myself, but I honestly have reached the point where I just don't see it happening. For one their friendship alone just isn't what it's been the past two seasons. Idk if its just me feeling this, but their scenes together, though sweet, just haven't been what they've been in the past. I mean this last episode is the most connection I feel from their characters than i have this whole season. I'm still not over Eddie's lack of reaction to Buck being trapped when Buck was ready to dig through the earth to find Eddie. Though I think there is still a chance Buck could be BI I just no longer have hope that Buddie is going to be a thing. I mean, they've at least hinted that Buck could ride that way, but Eddie has given zero signs of being into men at all. But honestly if they at least explore a BI Buck then I'll be happy, even if he's not with Eddie. It also doesn't help that there's a HUGE possibility that Oliver and Ryan don't get along anymore. They stopped following each other on social media and they post pictures with all the rest of the cast except each other. Its just looking extremely unlikely.

- I don't think Ana deserves as much hate as she's getting. I wasn't so fond of the Eddie/Ana pairing either, mostly because I was so into Buddie. But Ana does seem genuinely a great person and its a plus that Christopher loves her. I just wish that if they were going to persue this they would have built it up more and showed us more of her character. I mean we know close to nothing about her which is what makes it hard to like her or like her with Eddie.

- I'm glad that even if Buck doesn't end up with Eddie he still is obviously going to be someone very close to Christopher. Their relationship is so absolutely darling and even if its not Buddie, Buck is very obviously like a second dad.

- At first I was not at all happy with them bringing back Taylor. I found her character so freaking annoying in the past. But honestly her character seems to have mellowed out and I actually liked her. But I am PRAYING that if she sticks around its just as a friend and not a girlfriend. Buck and Taylor are just a huge NOPE in my book.

- I need more of Athena, Bobby, and Michael ASAP! I miss seeing them more on my screen!

- I'm super excited for baby Chimney/Maddie. And I'm so happy Chimney felt safe enough in his relationship to express his feelings about an at home birth. Their relationship is so sweet and healthy and it makes my heart so warm

- I swear on everything I love if they take that little baby away from Hen and Karen I will RIOT! I also hope to see more of Hen's mom and can't wait to see her pass her exam.

- Albert was wrong for dating Buck's bad date, but he's a good guy and overall a good friend. Buck needs more friends outside of Eddie. I hope they give him more of a storyline in part 2.

- Overall loved the first half of 9-1-1 season 4. I hope they do another crossover in part 2 so that Buck can meet Carlos.

9-1-1 Lone Star

- Yes I have hated the baby trope this first half, yes Gwyn has been annoying af and I'm ready for her to go, and YES Owen has been annoying this season too. But I still love Owen and no I don't believe he's a bad person or a bad father. I hope they do right by his character in the second part and bring the old Owen back now that his life is going to go back to what it was. But I also know this is going to leave room for another romantic interest which you just know they're going to bring in. Maybe they'll bring Michelle back 🤷🏽‍♀️

- The amount of screen time Carlos got is *chefs kiss*. I'm so glad we got to see more into his family dynamic. And how great he is as a cop?! Like make that man a detective already! Also Rafael's acting is superb. He has the most expressive eyes I've ever seen! His face with Owen compliments him on his caring heart and how that makes him a great cop? He BEAMED and it was like no one had ever told him that before. I wanted to hug him so badly.

- I'm so happy they're showing a healthy gay relationship. Sure they've had their ups and downs, but they show TK and Carlos working it out perfectly with good communication which is what we need to see represented more with LGBTQ+ couples on TV. I have no doubt they'll last because they're literally the reason most people tune in and the showrunners know that. And that reuniting hug? Ronen and Raf's real life friendship makes their on screen relationship feel so real and I hope that never changes.

- I need more Mateo. The only thing we know is that he's dyslexic and has a cousin in LA. He's such a great character I wish they'd give him more screen time.

- I know that most y'all see them as just a brother/sister pair, but I love the idea of Mateo/Marjan as a couple. I feel like she could help him grow up a little while he could help her have more fun. But either way I love their relationship and want to see more.

-PLEASE give Paul a GREAT love interest. Someone who loves and accepts him for everything he is. He deserves so much love.

- Tommy Vega is THAT BITCH! She deadass basically said "shoot me. You won't". LOVE seeing a strong black woman on the screen. And I hope they give more screen time to Nancy. I feel like she could be a really interesting character.

- Am I the only one that kind of wants to see them bring back Billy Tyson? I know thats so random, but I think he needs redemption. Idk 🤷🏽‍♀️

- Last but not least......thank GOD I read spoilers before watching the episode because if I hadn't prepared myself and they ended the show with that bridge scene......all I gotta say is JUDD AND GRACE BETTER BE FUCKING OK! OR I'M FIGHTING EVERY DAMN BODY! But honestly I think they will be. These two make the show, for one. Judd is deadass the glue that holds that firehouse together and is overall a great character. No way they're killing him off. And Grace is a fucking saint and also a great character. And she's one of the only two black women on the show. Showrunners, y'all really wanna try that? They're such a great, healthy relationship who are literally so unstoppable together. I think they'll have some trauma but survive. And possibly a Ryder baby? Yes please, and please let it be a baby boy. Judd needs a little mixed cowboy 🤠

- Overall the season has been good, but too Owen/Gwyn central. Hoping the next part has more spotlight on the others. Maybe some "Character Begins" episodes? I think a "Judd Begins" Episode would be perfect to start off with to tie into the whole "omg is he alive" aspect we're bound to get.

[tarlos-spain]

Febuwhump Day 1: Head wound

Title: You sleep close to me, but dreaming so far away

Fandom: 9-1-1 Lone Star

Pairing: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand

Characters: Carlos Reyes, TK Strand, the 126 family, Owen Strand

Chapters: 1/?

This story was born for the Febuwhump, so enjoy it.

Summary: The blood running down his face and across his lips woke Carlos up. He coughed from the strong metallic taste running down his throat. He rolled over and then realized he was lying on a road, literally in the middle of nowhere.

It was night and with no city lights, he could see a million stars in the sky. He took a moment to think about everything that had happened in the last few hours. The mission; there were about seventy-five people deployed on all four sides of the city.

They were not going to let the fugitives escape and they had everything under control. So what had gone wrong? They had split them into groups, Carlos working with FBI Agent Terrence, along with eight other police officers from the city.

"Have a good day and see you tonight," TK said as Carlos grabbed his bag and walked to the door. "Come back to me, remember you have to come back to me."

It was their tradition: when one of them left for work, they would promise to see each other when the shift was over, no matter what time it was, no matter how many hours the shift lasted. The first thing was to see each other, kiss and cuddle on the couch until they fell asleep, or until they got hungry.

The morning was awful when they woke up. The sun wasn't quite out yet, but it was easy to see the storm clouds that would soon bring rain. TK hated days when there was no sun; in a way he needed the natural light to wake up in a good mood.

"I always feel like I'm married to Superman," Carlos said, rolling over in bed. There were still five minutes before the alarm clock went off and he wanted to seize them before starting a double shift in the patrol car.

"What do you mean? I assure you I don't have any Superman powers, babe."

"You have a lot of things, starting with the good heart and the need to help everyone. But, in case you didn’t know, Superman needs sunlight so he can use his powers and regenerate when he gets hurt."

"Wait, you never told me you liked to read comics - comic con?"

"Every summer from the time I was sixteen until I entered the police academy? You?"

"About the same."

"Does that mean we probably saw each other in the halls sometime before we met?"

TK nodded and they both burst out laughing. Carlos kissed him, there were still things that made them prove to each other that they had more in common than they thought. They lay on the bed and cuddled until finally the alarm on Carlos's phone went off and it was time to come back to reality.

"I'll call you as soon as I have some free time. I think I'm going to spend most of today in the patrol car driving around the city. If nothing strange happens..."

"Shhhh." TK approached Carlos with two cups of coffee, handed him one and put two fingers to his lips. "I don't know about cops, but we firefighters are... they're very superstitious people and the worst thing a firefighter can do is say that phrase."

"What did I say?"

"That thing about if it doesn't...you know...happen...that."

"Oh."

"Exactly, don't say it, because the opposite will most likely happen and I assure you it will be a very bad day."

He gave Carlos another nervous kiss, until he noticed his boyfriend's hands pressing against him tightly.

"I'm sorry, tiger, I didn't mean to overwhelm you just after getting up. I won't say it again, don't worry."

"It's okay, I don't like days that start with a storm on the horizon. Just be careful out there today, please."

TK watched him as he left, feeling it was going to be a really long day and feeling even worse that he wasn't wrong when he saw the news on TV.

"Five escaped prisoners. Five convicts who were to be transferred to prison have managed to take control of the vehicle in which they were being transported, and five minutes later escaped to the outskirts of Austin."

Carlos called him a moment later.

"Tell me it's not because of what I said this morning," he said in a voice intended to be ironic. "The point is, I've been asked to join the search for those fugitives. I'll be late today, it's possible I'll be in on it until tomorrow."

"Babe, those people are dangerous, aren't they?"

"Five murderers who have to serve life sentences for multiple murders."

"And I suppose it's mandatory that you're part of..." TK took a sharp breath and let the air out slowly, he didn't want to show how worried he was...even if he didn't know why at that moment. "It's your job, I know, but I don't want you to put yourself in danger for no reason. There are other people, other agents who... They're dangerous killers, babe."

"TK, it's going to be fine; it's not the first time I’ve been on a mission like this, and it's rare when something bad happens or like in the movies."

"Sorry, really, sorry. You said it, everything will be fine. I love you, do what you can to come home tonight."

They both knew that probably wouldn't happen, but they said goodbye, still maintaining the naturalness of a normal day.

TK didn't hear from Carlos again all day and didn't want to bother him or seem insecure either. But the truth was that watching the news, listening to the stories they told about those fugitives, weren’t making it any easier for him to watch the hours go by without word from Carlos.

"Babe, I know catching dangerous guys isn't as fast as it is in the movies," TK texted Carlos past three in the morning, and also more than eight hours without hearing from him.

He had invited his father home for dinner. He didn't want to be alone on such a complicated day. Being alone meant thinking too much, getting overwhelmed and scared. That never ended well.

So when the phone rang from an unknown number in the middle of the night, father and son stared at each other. Owen had told TK to go to sleep, he was staying up until they heard from Carlos.

He hadn't given him time to do so.

"Mr. Strand?" said a female on the other end of the phone. Although she had only uttered two words so far, she sounded cold which sent a shiver through TK's entire body. "This is Agent Terrence, I'm in command of the group of officers who are searching for the escaped prisoners."

"Yes...pleased to meet you..." stammered TK. "Can you tell me how things are going?"

"TK, excuse me but..."

"I know, I know, you can't tell me how the mission is going and I don't really care... I care that these people end up back in jail, but I haven't heard from my husband in hours and I'm worried."

"That's why I'm calling you. Agent Reyes has been part of one of the groups that have been chasing fugitives all day today." TK walked over to the couch, he knew that whatever that woman was going to tell him was not good news. "Mr. Strand, what I'm about to tell you... I'm sorry, I really am."

"What...what are you sorry about? Agent Terrence, what happened to Carlos?"

*

The blood running down his face and across his lips woke Carlos up. He coughed from the strong metallic taste running down his throat. He rolled over and then realized he was lying on a road, literally in the middle of nowhere.

It was night and with no city lights, he could see a million stars in the sky. He took a moment to think about everything that had happened in the last few hours. The mission; there were about seventy-five people deployed on all four sides of the city.

They were not going to let the fugitives escape and they had everything under control. So what had gone wrong? They had split them into groups, Carlos working with FBI Agent Terrence, along with eight other police officers from the city.

They had been ordered to find Logal Tanner, a criminal convicted of six murders and the attempted murder of four others. Three consecutive life sentences awaited him. He had nowhere to go, everyone knew his face, Terrence and other agents said they only had to follow procedure.

Everything would be fine.

He had lost count of how many times he had heard those words in a single day, or worse, how many times he had said them in his mind. Now it turned out that neither when he had heard them nor when he had uttered them had been correct.

He tried to sit up, but realized it was a very bad idea, for as soon as he lifted his head a little, he felt the most terrible pain he had ever felt. It spread from right inside his head, down his neck, and into his back.

He was sure it was a concussion, if not something worse, for when he put his hand to his head he could almost feel the fracture beyond the scalp. So he lay back down on the asphalt.

For a while, for a few hours, he had considered joining the FBI—those agents had more knowledge, more tools, and they seemed more capable than the Austin police. Maybe it was the step forward he had been missing for some time.

But as the hours on the mission wore on, he soon realized that no one really knew where to look for Tanner. They split them into smaller groups of two or three and had them comb along all the roads.

They had placed him with two other city police officers and he turned out to be the one with the most experience. That had been one of the problems, he remembered now. The other two, a girl who had only been an officer for two years and a silent boy who, despite being a cop for three years, was more scared than a five year old, unanimously decided to follow his orders.

"TK..." he groaned as he turned around, ready to get up, even if he had to get on all fours like a damn dog to do so. But he had no intention of lying there any longer, or worse, risking dying from the head wound. "TK...I'm alive...I'm alive...I'm coming back to you. Trust me, please."

He had been about to call TK while the girl whose name he couldn't even remember was driving. The other boy—Jack or John, he couldn’t remember because it was all a blur in his memory—in the back seat of the car leaned towards the front.

"Have I heard of you?"

Carlos turned around before he finished the message he was texting TK. "Excuse me?"

"You're Carlos Reyes, aren't you? Your father is a ranger; the story of how that arsonist tried to burn you and your boyfriend alive is mythical among rookies, though I honestly prefer the one about how you freed your boyfriend from kidnapping..."

"Husband, TK is my husband, though I hope I'm not known for being married to a man."

The boy, John... Now he remembered his name was John, went back to his seat and didn't say anything else for quite a while. Carlos turned his attention back to the phone. "I'm sorry but I don't think I can..."

The message was left incomplete because of his other companion's shout.

"There! Tanner's there."

She braked hard, and they got out of the car and took off running, chasing him on foot, and then... Then, there was nothing. Just pain, darkness, and waking up in the middle of the road.

He reached into his pocket where he always kept his phone tucked away, but obviously it was gone; he didn't have his gun either. Whatever had happened in the lost time wasn't important if he didn't manage to get on the road home...wherever that was.

He managed to get to his knees and then the nausea hit. He vomited in the middle of the road and, as he did so, he felt again the pain of the three blows he had taken to his head.

The worst was the one to the temple, from which blood was still gushing, although now the flow of blood was less, but that had been the second one. The first had been to the back of the head, someone had made him fall to the ground... Tanner, it had to have been Tanner, they had found him and he had done everything possible to escape. The third blow he couldn't remember, but he had the feeling that he had woken up and then had been hit again.

His stomach was empty and his throat was sore when he finished vomiting.

It was now or never. He struggled with his legs, with his whole body to get to his feet and after staggering with the first few steps, he managed to walk and, most importantly, lift his head to see what awaited him. Road on one side, road on the other.

The headache was not the only pain in his body. He must have had a couple of broken ribs and one of his legs and an ankle hurt, but nothing serious enough to keep him from walking... Nothing like the head wound.

Before setting off somewhere, he tore off a piece of his shirt and made himself a makeshift bandage. Not that his clothes were extremely clean, but it was the best he had on hand at the moment.

"I'm so sorry I said that stupid thing that jinxed the day, sweetheart. I've learned my lesson, I won't say it again, tiger. I don't know where I am...but I'm coming back, TK. I'm coming back to you."

He staggered again, but managed to stand and keep walking. He was lucky to find a sign which said: Austin 15 miles. It was a long way to go, but if he stayed where he was, in the middle of the road, it would be no better. Of all things, his only chance was to walk somewhere and hope someone found him.

He knew that with the headache he was feeling, how dizzy he was, the blurred vision and nausea, the best case was a concussion; the worst...if it was anything more than a concussion he would find out soon enough, so he just decided to keep walking, the image of TK waiting for him at home in his head.

*

"Three hours ago we lost contact with your husband's team," Agent Terrence said.

"Three hours? You lost contact with my husband three hours ago and you're telling me now?"

"We found the bodies of his two partners an hour ago and..."

"What?" TK thought he dropped the phone from his hand. "No...Carlos...no."

He looked at his father, willing him to hand him the phone because he didn't want to hear what that woman had to say to him just yet. If he didn't hear it, then it wasn't real.

"That's precisely why I hadn't contacted you yet, Mr. Strand. Carlos is still unaccounted for."

"You should have told me much earlier, I deserved to know."

"Excuse me, Mr. Strand, but it's protocol."

"Fuck protocols, dammit! My husband has been missing for over three hours and you're telling me they've found the bodies of the two officers who were with him!" A sharp pressure in his chest made TK pause for a moment to try to breathe. "What do you know about Carlos, damn it?"

"We lost contact with him shortly after his team managed to find the convict they were looking for. They were headed in the direction of the city forces."

"And?"

Owen's hand on TK’s shoulder gave him enough strength to keep from bursting into tears.

"We lost contact with them until we found..."

TK dropped the phone and let out a desperate cry. He curled up on the couch and listened to his father say something over the phone to the agent. He couldn't care less. Then she saw him move, maybe in slow motion or maybe it was just that his brain had slowed down. He leaned over him and hugged him. TK let himself go, he had no strength or desire to do anything.

“I knew something was going to go wrong today, Dad. I could feel it.”

“Just because they haven’t found Carlos, doesn’t mean… Anything could have happened.”

“Make him come back, please, Dad. I can’t lose him, I can’t lose…”

“Shhh. TK, we’re not going to lose hope, but you need to sleep.”

“No…”

“We’re not going anywhere.” Owen moved him so that TK’s head rested on his legs. “Remember when they discharged you in New York after your last relapse? For two days, you slept like this, with me on the sofa.” He stroked TK’s head, and then his back—that always worked on his son.

TK fell asleep in the early hours, exhausted from crying, hoping that it might have all been a nightmare. Maybe, when he woke up, that day would never have existed.

[bluenet13]

Hay Amor en Todas Partes (Part 2/2)

Written for @badthingshappenbingo

Fandom: 9-1-1: Lone Star

Characters: T.K. Strand, Carlos Reyes, Firehouse 126 Crew (basically everyone is here)

Prompt: Losing Their Temper

Summary: After a night out, Carlos and TK encounter two men with nothing good to say. When tempers flare, punches fly, chaos ensues, and two become six, leaving Carlos and TK at their mercy.

Chapter 1

Links: ff.net - AO3

Judd and Grace were tangled together on the couch watching a movie when Judd's phone rang. Frowning, he grabbed it and looked at Grace in confusion, showing her the name on the screen. Confusion on both their faces, because sure, both Judd and Grace were friends with the officer but he rarely called them.

"Reyes?" Judd said, instantly putting the call on speaker. "Carlos, you there? TK?"

A grunt could be heard from the other end and the couple shared a puzzled look. "Is this some kind of joke?" Judd asked, managing to sound only mildly exasperated.

"Should we call TK?" Grace inquired, moving to her phone already.

Hearing another groan, and shuffling on the other side, Judd's features twisted to mild disgust. "Do you think they… are they-?" Judd cut himself short, shaking his head, not even wanting to think about what he could be hearing, and moved to end the call.

"Judson, wait," Grace directed, her hand coming to rest over his. "Turn the volume all the way up. I don't think this is an accidental call." And never one to question his wife, Judd did as directed.

While Judd spent his days saving lives in the physical world, Grace spent hers helping people through a phone, and nobody was better at her job than her. So now, she closed her eyes and listened. Opening them again and looking at her husband with horror in her eyes as soon as they both recognized the distinct sound of fists and feet connecting with a body, and various accompanying pained gasps and grunts.

"Carlos what the hell is going on? Where are you? We're coming to help," Judd screamed into the phone, but no response came. Then a gruff voice softly spoke, but it sounded far away so they could only make out the word 'alley'.

"Grace, call 9-1-1. Then call the crew, I want to stay on the line with Carlos," Judd directed, turning to his wife, even as he ran to their room to get a jacket and some shoes. "And don't bother calling TK, I'm sure whatever is happening they're together."

When Judd came back to the living room, Grace was already standing by the door, dressed and ready to go, keys already in her hand and phone pressed to her ear.

"Where do you think you're going?" Judd breathed out.

"To help. TK might be your teammate, but he and Carlos are my friends too. Let's go," Grace left no room for argument, and opened the door, not waiting for Judd to follow, just knowing that he would.

And so he did.

-x-x-x-

Carlos Reyes has always known he would die alone. It was a fact he had accepted the very day he enrolled in the police academy. And he had made peace with that notion, even if he wasn't fond of the idea. But right now, he cursed inwardly, because he had much rather die alone than face the possibility of TK dying alongside him, or even worse, instead of him.

TK Strand had almost died more than a few times, and long ago he had already questioned and accepted his own mortality, but he had never made peace with the idea of losing people close to him. And there was no one he wanted to lose less than Carlos Reyes, so right now, he stilled his nerves and told himself he would welcome death like an old friend, hoping destiny would see it as an invitation and chose to take him instead.

When the shot ran out, TK and Carlos both flinched. Hands unclasping as they both waited for the pain. Eyes going simultaneously wide as they reached the same conclusion when none came. Both, cop and paramedic, were too scared to turn around to their boyfriend and what they would find there, so instead they just closed their eyes and waited. Until the sounds of sirens gave them the little push they needed to continue being brave and turn to each other.

Simultaneous smiles reached their lips as they saw the other one was okay, and Carlos and TK collapsed in an embrace. Holding each other up, both hanging on for dear life.

Footsteps coming close broke the hug, and Carlos and TK fumbled and stumbled as they both tried to push the other behind. Neither sure of the upcoming threat, just focused on protecting their boyfriend. But the attempt was unnecessary because they were finally safe.

Aaron laid on the ground in front of them, blood pouring out from a sniper round to his head, and the other five men had disappeared, but most likely were currently being rounded by APD, if the blinking red and blue lights in every direction were any indication.

"Are you guys okay?" Marjan asked first.

"What the hell happened?" Judd added not a second later.

"Paramedics are on route," Grace directed, phone still pressed to her ear.

"Come on let us help you," Paul offered, holding out his hand.

"You both look like hell," Mateo said, because he just couldn't help himself.

TK and Carlos looked up and away from Aaron's body, to see their friends, their family, surrounding them. Everyone was there, Judd, Grace, Paul, Marjan, Mateo, even Nancy. All looking nervous and sounding more than a little bit breathless.

"What? Uh? How?" TK fumbled with the words, staring at the group with wide and still slightly frantic green eyes. "How did you find us?" He finally managed to whisper.

"You have to thank your boy over there," Judd drawled, his hands closed into fists at his sides.

Turning to Carlos, TK raised his eyebrows in a silent question.

"When, when they were focused on you, I took out my phone and tried to contact Judd. I couldn't send a message so I just left the call open. I thought of calling 9-1-1 but you never know who's going to get that call and if they're going to take something like this seriously. Besides, I already knew where the best operator in town was," Carlos explained, smiling shyly at Grace. "But I wasn't sure it had even worked. Sean was standing over me and I couldn't see the screen well," Carlos finished with a breathy laugh, one of pure relief.

"It worked, alright," Judd said proudly, "but what the hell happened?"

Both Carlos and TK deflated at that, neither wanting to relive the experience. But their friends deserved to know, especially because they had all paused their lives to be here, so they took turns telling the story. From the moment they left the bar until just now when the 126 rescued them from almost certain death.

"Bastards," Paul hissed, eyes darkened.

"I would kill him myself if he wasn't already dead," Judd mumbled, staring at Aaron's lifeless body, and only managed to look slightly regretful when Grace whispered a stern 'Judson'.

"I hope the other five rot in prison," Nancy said under her breath, and everyone else nodded.

"Damn, that sucks, dude. That's why you shouldn't go out without adult supervision," Mateo teased lightly.

"Not that you are that much of an adult, probie. But you're right. No more bars or nightclubs unless the crew is there," Marjan added with finality.

Still shaken and in pain, Carlos and TK couldn't help but laugh because their friends were truly something. But they wouldn't have it any other way.

"Can we go home, baby?" TK asked after a moment of silence, turning to his boyfriend.

"Yeah, we can," Carlos whispered, pushing TK's hair back and kissing him on the forehead, where a bruise was already forming.

"Uh no, you're both going to the hospital," Judd interjected.

"But -" Both TK and Carlos tried to say.

"No buts, if it was only one of you that was hurt, we all know the other one wouldn't have it any other way. So no arguing now, and just do as we say," Paul said, leaving no room for argument.

TK just pouted and tried to give the team his best puppy eyes but they were seemingly immune to his charm by now because they all shook their heads and turned around.

"Come on, Ty. We can make a date out of it," Carlos offered, groaning as he lifted himself from the ground and extended his hand to TK.

Taking it, TK kissed Carlos' bruised knuckles and mouthed a silent 'thank you'. Then let himself be pulled off the ground as they walked to the waiting ambulance, their weight supported in between Judd and Paul, the rest of the crew instinctively moving to surround them from all sides, enclosing the couple in a protective circle.

-x-x-x-

The next few hours were spent in the ER, both TK and Carlos going for countless x-rays, and scans. But in the end, their injuries were deemed to be painful and bothersome, but not life threatening. So when it was nearing 5 in the morning, they were finally discharged with clear instructions to take it easy, rest for the next few days, and come back if any of their symptoms or injuries worsened.

"Ready to go home?" Carlos asked TK as he helped him close the bottoms on his shirt. Thankful the team had brought them clean clothes so they didn't have to wear the bloody and dirty ones.

"I have never been more ready," TK said sincerely, pushing Carlos' hand away. "But, I'm not the one with three cracked ribs, I can dress myself."

"Yeah, but you're the one with two broken fingers, and a sprained wrist," Carlos said matter-of-factly.

"Can we stop comparing scars and get the hell out of here?" Paul deadpanned from the door, then turned around to shout something towards the waiting room. "They're decent guys, you're good to come in."

Carlos blushed and TK rolled his eyes, parting his lips to say something, but his attempt was interrupted as the rest of the 126 came into the room. Conversation flowing easily as if they had all been together in the room for the past few hours.

"Besides, I think we can all agree you both look like hell," Marjan added helpfully, the rest of the team nodding their agreement. Their words teasing, but their eyes betraying the concern and anger they were all feeling.

"What are you guys still doing here?" TK asked, ignoring their jokes, because he had already looked at himself in the mirror, and knew exactly how he looked.

"It's been hours, you should have gone home," Carlos agreed.

"Did you guys really think we would leave you alone after what happened?" Paul asked incredulously.

"Yes?" TK shrugged, but smiled at them anyways. "There's these helpful apps called Uber or Lyft if you guys didn't know, we would have called one."

"Dude, what's the point of having friends if you have to rideshare home from the hospital?" Mateo said softly, then looked uncomfortable when all eyes turned to him.

"Probie is right," Marjan said with a smile, clapping Mateo on the shoulder, "you guys are family and family don't let each other take an Uber from the hospital."

"Much less after getting the crap beat out of you by racist and homophobic assholes," Paul added under his breath, looking ready to murder someone if he could get his hands on any of the six men who attacked his friends.

"What's taking so long?" Judd popped his head inside the room, cutting all conversation short. "Come on, let's go. Tommy and Owen will meet us at your house."

Hearing his dad's name TK groaned and silently wondered if it was too late to ask his doctor to admit him for the night. Carlos picked up on his anxiety, and took his hand and squeezed softly.

"Did you really have to call him?" TK couldn't help but ask, "tonight, I mean. Couldn't you have waited until tomorrow?" He amended after everyone glared at him.

"Of course we had, we didn't all want to lose our jobs," Marjan said with a shrug, trying to sound nonchalant but failing miserably. Everyone was rattled, and no one was doing a good job of hiding it.

"At least this time it really wasn't your fault that you got hurt, so maybe Cap will take it better," Mateo offered, but even he sounded like he didn't believe his words.

"Or he might just finally decide to bubble wrap TK so he stops getting hurt," Nancy proposed, "I know Tommy and I were talking about it after the whole kidnapping incident."

"That actually sounds like a great idea," Carlos perked up at that.

"Shut up, Reyes, you're in the hospital too," TK mumbled.

"Behave boys," Grace said softly, in her best 9-1-1 dispatcher tone, calm and collected but firm in her opinion. "You know Captain Strand worries about you, TK. We waited to call him and Tommy after we knew more of what was happening, but we did after the doctor spoke to us. If it was the other way around and Owen was hurt, you would have wanted us to call you too."

"Thanks, Grace," Carlos breathed out, while TK only nodded, "actually, thank you all. We don't know what would have happened if you hadn't shown up with half the cops in the city." He did know, but he didn't want to voice those words. Instead choosing to end with his attempt at a joke.

"No need to thank us," Nancy said, stepping from the back of the room for the first time, "took me long enough to break Strand in after the last fiasco and parade of potential paramedics. I just can't deal with a new partner. And I'm sure your partner feels the same, Reyes."

Everyone laughed at that, but it never reached their eyes. T.K. and Carlos were okay now, but the events of the night would remain with them for some time. For now, the crew would just be there for their friends in whatever way they needed, and hope their love was enough to chase away any memories of what Aaron and his men had said and done.

-x-x-x-

Reaching their house a half hour later, Carlos and TK stepped out of Marjan's car with a groan, awkwardly leaning against the door and each other as they tried to steady themselves. Quickly getting out of his truck and the Camaro, respectively, Judd, and Paul ran to their friends, each setting one of their arms over their shoulders as they helped them to the front door.

Reaching the porch, Carlos smiled and TK groaned as Tommy, Owen, Gabriel and Andrea came into view, all of them instantly crowding the boys, fussing over them, asking questions, and offering to help. But thankfully, Paul took pity on them and respectfully pushed everyone away, sharing the doctor's words and reminding all their friends and family that Carlos and TK needed to rest.

As soon as they made it inside their home, they collapsed on the couch, both in pain but content to be in each other's arms and surrounded by their families and best friends. Once they were all settled around the living room, Owen handed them their prescriptions with two bottles of water, staying in front of them for an extra second as he looked them up and down. Seemingly satisfied with what he found, Owen nodded, squeezed both Carlos and TK's shoulders and stepped away. But visual confirmation wasn't enough for Tommy and Nancy as they insisted on checking the boys over, for their own benefit and mental peace. Gabriel and Andrea, for their part, went straight to the kitchen, setting bags on the counter and containers on the fridge. When they came back into the room, Carlos thanked his parents and hugged them both, silently wondering when his mother even had time to cook all that or if maybe she just had a stack of comfort food lying around on the fridge ready to go next time disaster struck.

Everyone then shared some small talk before they all left the house an hour later. The crew promising to be back on their next day off so they could play some video games or board games, while Owen and Andrea offered to return the next morning to make sure they were alright and help them around the house, and Gabriel vowed to get the Rangers on the case so these men could never attack or harass anyone ever again.

-x-x-x-

"Are you okay?" Carlos asked eventually, once they were finally alone in their bedroom, both just wearing boxers and a towel over their shoulders as they continued to air dry their damp bodies.

"Not really," TK said honestly, head tilting sideways as he looked at Carlos thoughtfully. The shower had helped, but it hadn't been enough to erase all the fears and worries after the night they just had. "But I will be. What about you?"

"Pretty much the same, but mostly just worried about you," Carlos admitted softly, fingers carding through TK's hair as Carlos stepped in between his legs, while TK sat on the bed.

"Why? I didn't go through this alone. It didn't just happen to me," TK explained, moving his hands to Carlos' hips and pulling him closer.

"Yeah, but I feel like it's my job to protect you. And I failed at it," Carlos said simply, eyes darkening as he felt the plastic splint on TK's wrist brush against his skin.

"Why, because you're a cop?" TK wondered.

"Because I'm your boyfriend."

"And I'm yours," TK said easily, "so that means we protect each other."

Carlos nodded, but still looked unconvinced.

"I'm a big boy, Carlos. I can handle some homophobic and racist assholes," TK tried next.

"But you shouldn't have to," Carlos whispered. His fingers now softly running over the bruise on TK's temple.

"And you shouldn't either. No one deserves something like this. But, sadly, these things happen," TK said with a shrug. "And I know that doesn't make it better, but it's just the way it is."

"It sucks." Carlos sighed, because it did and there was nothing else to say.

"It sure does. But we will be okay. We just need to go about this like we do everything else, we handle it together and move forward as a team. No need for you to take the weight of the world on your shoulders alone. Not when you have someone to bear it with you." TK moved his hands from Carlos' hips to his back, softly running his fingers over the tense spots and knots around his boyfriend's shoulder blades. It was a bit awkward with broken fingers and a splint, but like everything, they made it work.

Carlos hummed his agreement and closed his eyes, taking a moment to enjoy the comfort his boyfriend was so graciously gifting him, even when he was hurt too. After a few minutes, Carlos opened his eyes again, instantly getting lost in the green of TK's gaze, and his body naturally leaned forward. TK easily met him in the middle, their lips connecting in a sweet kiss.

TK's hands left Carlos' back to wrap around his body, pulling him closer as they slowly deepened the kiss. Lips parting in simultaneous invitations, but the moment was short lived as TK hugged a little too hard and Carlos groaned against his lips. His injured ribs protesting the movement even when his heart leaped in his chest.

"You're hurt," TK breathed out, stepping out of his boyfriend's space and limping to the bathroom, a smile gracing his face after hearing Carlos' little whimper at the loss of contact. "Lie down," he directed when he returned a minute later, supplies in hand.

Carlos raised an eyebrow and chuckled. "I would love nothing more but I think we're in no physical condition for that."

"Ha, ha." TK waved the bottle of 'Arnicare' in his hand, before pointing to the bed.

Carlos nodded and carefully sat on the bed. Then took a few steadying breaths before he fell back on the mattress. Barely suppressed grunts and a wince escaping as the movement pulled at his tired and sore muscles.

Moving forward TK put some of the cream on Carlos' abdomen and began rubbing softly, mindful of the broken ribs and bruises that were already visible on his skin. "Just relax," TK said softly, feeling Carlos tense under his touch. "I won't hurt you."

"I know," Carlos said honestly. TK could never, would never. But the memories of what happened at the bar were still fresh on his mind. So, he moved his hand to TK and set his palm over his thigh. And only then could he really relax. His heart needing the physical connection as much as the sight of his boyfriend standing in front of him.

When TK finished with the cream, he wiped his hands on the towel and left the room. Returning soon after with two ice packs, one which he set over the worst of the purple coloring his boyfriend's skin, and the other one over his own temple. He then turned off the lights and climbed into his side of the bed.

Wordlessly, Carlos shuffled closer and set his hand over his boyfriend's chest, letting the steady beat of TK's heart ground him and calm his own. "Thank you," he whispered eventually, hoping the simple message conveyed more than just gratitude. He wanted it to mean 'I love you', 'if I had to go through this I'm glad it is with you', 'I'm sorry you had to hear those things and get hurt', and so much more. But his words were failing him tonight, so he settled for the two words that would always be true.

"Anytime," TK mumbled, voice laced with sleep. "But Carlos, promise me one thing?"

"Anything," Carlos offered easily.

"Next time this happens, because we both know it likely will," he began, but quickly backtracked, "I hope not the beating part, but the insults. Promise me that when, if, it happens again, you won't try to defend my honor." His words were serious, but Carlos sensed the smile that was on his lips. "You looked damn hot when you punched the bastard on the face, but -"

Carlos chuckled at that, knowing that losing his temper had only made things worse, even when he had done his best to keep TK under control. But still, he promised nothing. Because as certain as he was that something like that could happen again, he was also confident that he would always defend TK. From homophobic and racist men, or anything else that threatened his boyfriend. And TK seemed to know and understand because he didn't press the issue any further. Mostly because he would do the same thing. Anytime and any day.

"But thank you," TK did say, his hand seeking Carlos' and intertwining their fingers together, before he moved it to his lips and pressed a kiss over his knuckles.

"Anytime, and always," Carlos echoed his boyfriend, before ending on a promise of his own. Then he inhaled a deep breath, taking it all in. "I love you, Ty." The words flowing more easily this time.

"Love you, too."

The previous night might not have gone like they expected, but they had made it through. And now Carlos and TK simply continued to bask in their love. Because love could take many shapes and forms, and it sometimes happened in bed after a night of dancing at the bar, but other times it just entailed taking care of one another, and shared bruise cream and ice packs.

Snuggled against each other, and content, TK and Carlos eventually fell asleep. Because even when the world was at its darkest, the actions of their friends, families and each other had shown them that there was still love everywhere around them. Most people just had to look hard enough to find it, but for Carlos and TK finding it would always be the easy part. Since their love was a simple fact, a constant, and a reality that was as true as breathing.

[harvestleaves]

Role Reversal

Prompt: Hi, i'm in love with your out of breath series and i have a prompt If you can write It please. Carlos, for some reason has problems breathing in a scene with the 126, so it’s time for TK to help him. Thank you ❤️

A/N: Happy one year to the Out of Breath ‘verse!!  This time it’s Carlos’ turn!  He has an allergy induced asthma attack.  It was fun writing Carlos, I love his character and I feel that there definitely needs to be more on his background.  This is also posted on Ao3 here.

Rating: G

Word Count: 1,399

Carlos always had seasonal allergies, and there were times he couldn’t go on his elementary school field trips to local farms due to his allergy to hay and horses.  Needless to say, springtime was usually the one season that he was out of commission due to his sinuses.  But since he’d met TK in the middle of the summer, his boyfriend had yet to see him get more than just a cold.

But now, it was late March and all the flowers and trees were starting to bloom again in Austin, and Carlos’ eyes itched. It had started out early on patrol with his partner, Derek McCoy, and the other officer handed Carlos a Benadryl and a water silently before focusing back on the road when he saw the younger male rubbing furiously at his eyes.

Carlos was thankful for the allergy pill. It had calmed his itchy eyes, but his head now felt like it was stuffed full of cotton and his sinuses ached from the amount of congestion he was experiencing.

And to top it off, he was now wheezing.

Carlos couldn’t remember the last time his allergies had given him respiratory symptoms, and because of that, he knew for a fact that the inhaler in his desk back at the precinct with his name on the label was at least two years expired, and thus no good. His mama would kick his ass for not keeping his medications filled if she knew of his stupidity.

Shaking his head with a wheezy laugh at the thought, he raised an eyebrow when they got a call over the radio for them to head to a car crash on the highway.

“You good to go? You sound like shit,” Derek frowned as he looked at his partner in concern before he flicked the lights and siren on.

“Does TK know about your allergies?  Or the fact that you have allergy induced asthma?”

“It hasn’t acted up in a few years, and plus, it’s only a problem during allergy season.  It’s not the same,” Carlos grumbled with a pointed look over at McCoy.

“Hypocrite.  You want your boyfriend to be open to you about his asthma and you won’t tell him that you have allergy induced asthma?  How exactly is that fair to him?” Derek asked the younger man curiously as he pulled their cruiser up to the scene of the crash, raising an eyebrow at the trails of smoke rising from each of the vehicles before he spared Carlos a second glance.

Hopping out to help his partner with traffic and crowd control, Carlos stifled a cough into his elbow, wincing at the high pitched wheeze and rattle that his lungs produced.  He sounded like TK the few times he’d had to take his boyfriend to the ER for his own asthma, and he knew he probably needed a breathing treatment to open up his lungs, but his pride was keeping him from admitting his weakness.

Maybe he was a hypocrite.  How could he expect TK to be open and honest with him when he never even explained to his boyfriend how he already knew how to operate an inhaler, or how he could put a nebulizer together in his sleep?  He hadn’t had a relationship before this one with TK that had lasted longer than a few weeks, so it never really crossed his mind to explain his personal heath history with his boyfriend.

Carlos figured he’d talk to TK about it later, he had a job to do in the meantime.

Spotting the 126 rolling up to the scene, Carlos couldn’t hide the dopey smile that fell across his face when he spotted TK hop out of the firetruck to help Judd get the victims out of the cars before he quickly turned back to his work with a blush.

___________

The call went pretty quickly, with no serious injuries for either of the drivers involved, which TK was always thankful for.  Once he helped Marjan and Mateo load the gear back onto the rig, he made his way over to Carlos to talk to his boyfriend.  He was glad the two of them only had about an hour left in their shifts, one of the few days that their shifts lined up perfectly.

However, the closer he got to his boyfriend, the more he realized there was something wrong with the other male.  Carlos’ usually tanned face looked pale, and his eyes were slightly bloodshot.  But the most concerning thing to TK was the awful wheezing coming from his boyfriend, and the way his shoulders seemed to heave with every breath made TK wince internally.

“Hey babe, you feeling okay?” TK asked softly as he reached out a hand to Carlos’ bicep to squeeze it in concern.

“H-hey Ty.  Yeah, ‘m fine.  J-just allergies, y’know?” Carlos explained, trying to stifle a round of coughs that were making their way up his throat, but he couldn’t keep them down.

The next bought of coughs had Carlos doubled over, hands resting on his knees as he wheezed for breath that didn’t seem to want to enter his lungs and his heart started racing in panic.  He hadn’t had an attack this bad since he was a kid, his allergies typically only ever made him sneezy with the occasional wheeze, not full-blown respiratory distress like he was currently experiencing.  And it terrified him.

The only comfort Carlos found in that moment was TK’s soothing voice and the firm hand over his back as his boyfriend kept him upright, calling over Carlos’ partner.

Derek made his way over to them with a frown and crouched down in front of Carlos.

“He’s got allergy induced asthma.  Seasonal allergies started kicking in today.  He took some Benadryl this morning and I thought it helped.  Check his pockets, I know he carries your spare inhaler around.”

TK nodded and quickly patted down Carlos’ pants, a sigh of relief leaving his lips when he pulled out the inhaler and quickly shook it up before pressing it to his boyfriend’s lips.

“C’mon ‘Los.  Take a deep breath for me babe,” TK whispered softly into Carlos’ ear, as the other man took a shaky breath of the medication, letting it out in a harsh wheeze before another round of coughs shook his body.

“That’s it, let it all out.  Can you try another puff for me?”

Carlos nodded slightly at TK’s question and inhaled another breath of the medication, letting it settle into his lungs for an extra few seconds before he shakily let it out, leaning his bodyweight into TK.

“There we go, catch your breath.  I think you’re still gonna need a breathing treatment.  I think you should go to the hospital for it though,” TK said softly as he ran his fingers through Carlos’ curls gently, looking up as Captain Vega made her way over to them with Tim and Nancy.

“Hey guys.  Carlos needs to get taken in, allergy induced asthma attack.  He took two puffs of albuterol but he’s still wheezing and could use a treatment,” TK explained as they loaded Carlos onto a gurney and Tim slid an oxygen mask onto his face along with a pulse-ox meter onto his left hand.

“Sats are in the mid 80′s, and I’ve got him on 100% O2.  I’ll get him on a neb in the rig.  Do you want to ride with him?” Tim asked TK, noticing how he still looked shaken up over seeing his boyfriend unable to breathe.

“Yes.  Because once he’s better, he needs to tell me why he didn’t tell me he also has asthma.” TK nodded firmly with a pointed look at his boyfriend.

“It slipped my mind.  H-haven’t had an attack this bad since I was little.  And none of my relationships lasted long enough for them to find out about allergies, let alone asthma.  I didn’t wanna get judged,” Carlos explained tiredly, a wheeze trailing his words as he looked groggily up at TK.

“Baby.  You know I am the last person who will ever judge you for having asthma.  I love you, and nothing about you will ever change that.” TK whispered softly as he pressed a kiss to Carlos’ forehead before hopping into the ambulance with him, squeezing his hand gently.  Both a signal and a promise that he would always be there.

[howtosingit]

if ur ok with it can u break down the tarlos huggggg in the lst ep after tk tells evy1 abt his addiction? bc that gd huggggggg i wanna no every thing u think abt it i live for ur love for tarlos theyre just so so cuteeeee

IF I’M OKAY WITH IT?! Anon, I feel like I have been waiting my entire life for this ask. I could literally talk about this hug for the rest of my existence. I would talk about this hug every second of every day if I could and never get tired or bored. This hug has owned my entire heart from the moment that it happened and I can never get enough of it. Brace yourself for this essay, and remember that you asked for it...

Okay, so before I get to the actual hug, I want to talk for a minute about why I love it so much and also how fantastic the scene is that comes before it. I’ll try to keep both of those brief (LOL). If you want to skip to the hug breakdown, I’ll give the sections titles. 

Why I Love This Hug

So, why do I love this hug so much? Honestly, because I never in a million years thought we’d get something like it, and it was a big turning point for me.

I have not been quiet about how disappointing I think season 1 was. Too much Owen being Owen, too much Iris plot (which never interested me for even a single moment, unfortunately), not enough of the other characters - specifically the characters of color - and definitely not enough Tarlos.

Following episode 3, the show established a really frustrating pattern with Tarlos: they either never interacted with one another, or there was a moment of them at the end of an episode where they were in the same place physically but never spoke directly to one another. Frustration doesn’t even begin to describe the Tarlos talking drought between episodes 3 and 10 - and honestly? It’s bad writing. To focus on a ship for 3 episodes, giving them a lot of different nuances and conflict, and then do absolutely nothing with it? Stupid. So, going into the finale, my expectations were low. At that point, I was literally tuning in just to catch a glimpse of Carlos, with the expectation that that was all I would get. I really didn’t think I was going to watch the show after season 1. 

When the finale started with a Tarlos scene, I was honestly very surprised. But, then, of course, it was a “break up” scene, and I was like... well. So much for that. See, I fully expected, based on the trend throughout the later half of the season, that that would be the only Tarlos scene we would get, and that that is how they would end season 1. 

But when that camera cut to Carlos Reyes walking through the station door looking like a modern-day motherf*cking Prince Charming? I cried. I’m not ashamed to admit that. And then WHEN WE GOT THE HUG?! I can honestly still feel my heart pounding in my chest.

The finale didn’t fix everything for me; they still barely talk in their final two scenes. It’s not all perfect. But this hug, this small moment? THAT. IS. PERFECTION. (And I’m gonna go on and on about why in just a minute!)

Framing the Hug

I just want to take another moment here to chat about the entire fire station scene with TK and the team/Carlos because there’s a lot that informs why this hug is so freaking incredible. It has everything to do with the directing choices that were made - and boy were they good ones!

We all probably remember how the scene starts: extreme close-ups on TK as he sits waiting for the crew to come back. He’s anxious and possibly having a mild panic attack, and the camera is used to create that moment. Certain shots are out of focus, the shots that are focused are zoomed in to his mouth/hands/eyes, the sound is distorted, his breathing is isolated. It’s all super effective. 

So the observations that I make about this brief moment are: TK is stationary, the camera is basically attacking him. And TK is alone. Pretend for a moment that the camera is a character. The camera won’t leave him alone. No one is there to help him. His anxiety grows. 

(Even when the team joins him, the camera stays pretty close to him, except for one moment where it backs off but then approaches again. It continues to invade his personal space and his personal moments with his friends and his dad.)

Now, compare that to how the scene ends: TK walks away from the camera, the camera doesn’t follow him. It gives him space. His interaction with Carlos happens in the distance. If the camera is a character, TK defeated that character. He leaves it there, it no longer threatens him. I just really like that visual storytelling; that through the 4 minute scene, TK not only faces his demons, speaks his truth, and conquers his anxiety but he beats the camera and goes off to hug Carlos untethered. (He even bounces towards him, but we’ll get to that in a minute.) That doesn’t really have anything to do with the hug specifically, but I thought it was interesting anyway.

The other comparison that I want to make is a simple one, but it’s another reason why I love the hug: TK initiates it. He doesn’t initiate the group hug with his team (he actually almost says “we don’t have to do that” when Mateo moves towards him), though he obviously enjoys it. Owen initiates their hug, flinging himself at his son, and TK obviously appreciates it.

But the Carlos hug? TK approaches him, TK raises his arm to wrap around Carlos’s neck.

Okay, now to finally answer the original ask...

LET’S HUG IT OUT: THE BREAKDOWN THAT WAS ASKED FOR

First, can I just say from his first appearance to the end of this scene, Carlos is there for 20 seconds total and I am about to write a whole-ass essay about those 20 seconds?! I’m literal trash.

Okay, so Carlos appears looking like a fucking snack. He’s changed since the bus accident, looking like someone’s hot date, and I think we know whose... Owen is basically like “well this is unexpected” and honestly, same sir. TK is adorable and noncommittal, but clearly not surprised to see Carlos there. We’ve missed a moment between them since TK was sent to the hospital and Carlos called him impressive, that’s for sure. 

So when TK starts to walk towards him, the camera refocuses on Carlos and we see this adorable freaking look on his face that clearly says “how did it go?” or “all went well?” or something to that effect. I think Carlos knew what TK was doing at the station and he knew that it was a big deal for him, and I love that even before they are next to each other, he’s checking in to see how it went. He’s invested in TK’s well-being - as always - and he’s there to support him, both physically and emotionally. I COULD SCREAM.

In response to Carlos’s silent questioning, TK throws his head back and sighs. Like I said before, he seems to bounce towards Carlos, his body is pretty loose - his arms are swinging back and forth. This is a guy who just took a load off, and he’s relieved about having done so. The smile that Carlos gives him in answer says that he’s relieved too - that it went so well, that TK seems lighter. He might even be relieved that TK is being so much more open with him, clearly showing him his emotions. Their body language for this entire moment is very open, neither of them seem closed off. It truly does feel like, for the first time, they are meeting each other on equal footing, with all of their cards on the table before them. It’s such a different moment for them, certainly different than their body language during the boba date earlier in the episode.

I would be an absolute idiot if I did not pause and remark here how INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT IT IS that TK is the one that approaches Carlos. I’m not the first person to notice and say this, but Carlos “I hate being the one doing the chasing” Reyes stops just inside the door. He lets TK walk towards him. It’s such an interesting, nonverbal conversation between them. In this action, Carlos is saying “I’m here, but I’m still not going to force anything. You said you wanted space, so I’m giving it to you.” Sure, he comes to the station - but I would pay good money to bet that TK invited him there following some kind of conversation about what he was doing there - but he stays at the door. He’s cautious, but open. He wants something more with TK, but he’s not going to throw himself into it just to get hurt again. So, he waits. AND TK COMES TO HIM. TK leaves his own space and enters his. TK takes the final step. TK closes the gap. TK makes the big move, and they’re finally both right in front of each other, on the same wavelength. The find that solid ground from which they’ll build their relationship together. ISN’T IT JUST BEAUTIFUL?!

Seriously, kudos to Bradley Buecker for directing this episode with multiple levels of storytelling at play. It’s really great stuff.

OKAY, there’s a little Owen and Michelle moment, but then the camera finds Tarlos again. 

TK is standing in front of Carlos, they’re completely fixated on one another, their body language is just so fucking casual and comfortable I cannot stand it. See, the other hugs were all pretty intense: the team piles on top of TK, burying him, and Owen practically throws himself at TK, it’s a fairly hard hug for a man with an injured shoulder. But this hug? NOPE.

It’s so soft. It’s so gentle. TK raises his arm like he just can’t not wrap it around Carlos’s neck, like it’s the only way to be as close as possible to him and being as close as possible to him is all he wants in that moment.

What I really love about this hug is that it feels like two people who hug not because the moment is demanding it, not because they’re reuniting after a long time apart, not because they’re in a heightened state of emotion. 

These two hug like it’s just what they do, what they always want to be doing, like they don’t know how not to do it. The whole thing reads like “Hi, I’m TK and my arms belong around Carlos” and “Hi, I’m Carlos, and my arms belong around TK, what else would I be doing with them?” (It’s also the vibe I get from the club scene where they wrap their arms around each other.)

IT’S INTIMACY, Y’ALL.

Look, to be a Tarlos fan, I think you have to be willing to look at the relationship on two different levels, right? One is what they verbalize to each other, which is admittedly very little (season 2, come through). The other is the story that they tell through their body language. These two have seemingly always been on the same page physically. It just comes naturally to them, from the minute they first dance to their obviously very pleasing sex scene to the way they flirt in the bar to the club to Carlos at TK’s bedside. 

Their chemistry is made clear through how they physically relate to each other, and never is that more clear than in this hug that LITERALLY LASTS 2 SECONDS BUT CONTAINS MULTITUDES.

Okay, back to it... so TK strolls towards Carlos, Carlos waits for him - they symbolism is making me scream - TK raises his arm, it’s all super casual...

And then he just kind of literally falls into Carlos’s body, and Carlos basically just catches him. HOW BEAUTIFUL IS THAT.

They don’t even speak but because they’ve had a nonverbal conversation with just those looks that I talked about, there’s just this understanding that TK needs to just collapse a little bit and he never for one second doubts that Carlos will hold him up. THAT’S JUST WHAT THEY DO.

OKAY OKAY OKAY now we’re going to break this down from head to toe.

Like, the way that their heads just rest against each other, TK pressing close - I can almost imagine that he breathes in the scent of Carlos’s shampoo, his nose is pressed right there in his curls. AND JUST IMAGINE HIS SMILE, I BET IT’S BLINDING.

I love that their heads kind of curve around each other kind of, perfectly Yin and Yang - like, from above they would totally look like that symbol.

MY FAVORITE PART OF THE ENTIRE THING: CARLOS FREAKING REYES NUZZLING INTO TYLER KENNEDY STRAND’S NECK, LIKE HE JUST SHOVES HIS FACE RIGHT IN THERE

THE NECK KISS MADE ME SCREAM SO FUCKING LOUD THE FIRST TIME I SAW IT I COULD NOT HANDLE IT

First, it’s our first kiss since episode 2. 

Second, THE INTIMACY OF PRESSING A KISS TO SOMEONE’S NECK - LIKE THAT IS SUCH A SOFT PART OF YOUR BODY, THERE ARE TENDONS THERE, YOU CAN FEEL SOMEONE’S PULSE THERE - LIKE OH MY GOD

Nothing screams “I want to know every part of this man on a deep, committed level” than a fucking neck kiss, and Carlos Reyes just... he fucking does it. 

Okay but he really does bury his whole face in there like he wants to keep it there forever, I have truly never seen something so soft in my entire life. 

I’m so in love with them I could puke.

But like, that’s why this moment means so much to me, because I really do think that it’s a solidifying moment for both of them. 

For TK, it’s a “It’s okay if I stumble or fall because this man will catch me or help me up” thing

For Carlos, it’s “he wants me, he wants this, he’s taking literal steps towards this thing between us, and he encourages me to sink into him, he wants me to do that, he really wants this”

Like, fuck. 

Moving down... we gotta appreciate Carlos being mindful of TK’s shoulder, unlike literally everyone else who has hugged him. Like, he doesn’t even go anywhere near those stitches because there’s no fucking way he’s going to watch TK bleed out for the third time, nope.

And the way that Carlos just slides his arms around TK’s waist, pressing his palms into his lower back?! 

I think there’s a whole like, thing, where when a person’s hands are flat and open they’re like, open and vulnerable. So there’s just something about the way that Carlos presses both of his open palms against TK’s back that feels so open and vulnerable and honest to me.

Also, the way that he literally covers as much of TK’s back with his hands as possible? He doesn’t place his hands on top of one another, he stacks them along TK’s spine - he completely covers the entirety of his lower back. That’s a really vulnerable part of the human body, and Carlos instinctively protects it. AND TK LET’S HIM.

Okay, finally, down to their feet: TK really does collapse against Carlos, throwing himself on top of him and trusting that Carlos will keep him upright. All of his weight shifts to that forward momentum, he even goes up on the toes of his right foot. Carlos plants his feet, and as TK sways into him, he wraps him in his arms and gently centers them so that they don’t tip over to the ground.

He literally re-balances them. The two of them together find a balance with one another during this TWO-SECOND HUG. They shift, they steady themselves, they sink into one another.

It’s literally symbolic of them both being completely, 100%, without question, ready for the next phase of their relationship together.

They keep each other standing, and that’s fucking true love, y’all.

I honestly cannot wait for season 2. This hug and the final scene on the hood of Carlos’s car - with TK again making the move to embrace their relationship by physically reaching into Carlos’s space for his hand and dragging it into his own space, firmly opening the door to his heart to let him inside, while also settling Carlos’s hand between his own to let him know that he’s willing to protect him and his heart too - makes me believe that we are in for some truly wonderful romance with these boys. 

My heart will not stop screaming about it.