#i can have a hot lunch every day which is really pleasant

[signofthree]

i love you steamfresh veg i love you microwave rice cups i love you snack time chickpeas i love you individually pre-portioned food

[againstacecilia]

Cosmic Delight

Pairing: Din Djarin x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3k

Rating: 18+ minors DNI

Warnings: Reader still has some big feelings, alcohol, Din is beautiful (which isn't a warning, really, but feels like it needs to be).

A/N: Y'all, 400 followers already? I don't deserve any of you, thank you for reblogging and commenting and wanting to be a part of this little part of the internet. Also, always always always thank you to @creatively-analytical for beta-reading. I love you beyond words. 💖 Asks are always open!!

A binary sunrise rouses you from sleep, eyes cracking open and neck protesting from a night of sleeping in a chair. You uncurl and stand, stretching and massaging the knots from multiple spots on your body. It seems like Din isn’t up yet; thanking the Maker, you quietly descend the ladder and slip into the fresher.

The stark light above the small mirror casts your face in sharp relief. Your eyes are still puffy from the night before, nose and lips dry and raw from rubbing. Hoping to wash the night away, you turn on the fresher as hot as you can handle and stand under the spray.

Not even the scalding water can keep memories from flooding back, though, and the truth you admitted to yourself in the dark of night rears its head once again now in the glow of morning. You have feelings for Din, there’s no denying that now, and looking back over the last couple of months just confirms that for you. Your dedication to learning everything he taught you, the drive to catch Jafan, the fear that bloomed in your chest when you heard Din pass out last night, there were elements of your feelings for him in every moment for the last couple of weeks. You thought you wouldn’t feel anything like this after Arlon and his betrayal, but Din’s constant support and belief in you softened the ice that had begun forming around your heart before it even had a chance to take hold.

Turning off the water, you grab your towel and quickly dry off. Throwing your old clothes back on, you open the door and cross to your cot. You fully intend to climb in when the small door on Din’s bunk slides up and open and he begins to climb out.

“Morning,” he greets you, voice still groggy through the modulator.

“Morning,” you respond, “How are you feeling?”

“Bit of a headache but nothing to worry about.” He climbs fully out of his bunk and adjusts his armor. “How are you?”

“Fine.” You don’t make eye contact with him as you flop onto the cot.

He looks at you and, in the corner of your eye, you see his helmet tilt. You know the question he’s trying to ask: Fine? But you don’t acknowledge it. You just lay down and open your book, pretending to read.

Din’s stare lingers for another moment before he steps into the fresher. While he gets ready for the day, you stare at the pages in front of you desperately trying to come to terms with how you’re feeling. There’s no part of you that wants to leave or stop traveling with him, but would you be able to keep it together in front of Din? Was it fair to this other person in his life for you to be here with him while you had these feelings? Was it even healthy for you to be feeling like this so soon after Arlon? By the time the shower turns off and Din steps back out you’re more confused than before, mind spinning and chasing itself in circles.

“We still have some time before Karga expects us back,” Din’s voice pulls you from your racing thoughts, “Want to explore the city?”

“Sure,” you respond, voice higher than usual. If Din notices, he doesn’t say anything as the two of you get ready to go back into the morning crowd.

The day is drizzly, the sound of rain hitting the streets and the ocean around you creates a pleasant soundtrack to your day. You spend it popping in and out of shops, gathering supplies and experiencing the culture of Mon Cala. Din orders you lunch from a delicious-smelling cart and finds a table for you to eat, overlooking the waves below. For as far as your eyes can see there’s just the blue of the ocean before meeting the gray of the sky. Somehow, even the rain is beautiful here.

“You’ve been quiet today,” Din observes, visor still pointed at the horizon.

Wiping your mouth and swallowing the food you’d been chewing, you respond, “Just a big day yesterday.” You shrug and take another bite.

“You did well, Cuyan.” He finally turns to face you, gaze somehow hard hidden under the helmet. “Come on, tell me what’s wrong.”

You finish your lunch and stand to throw the trash in a bin nearby. “Really, it’s nothing. Let’s go back to the Crest.” Without checking to see if Din was following, you take off toward the hanger.

Din takes your lead and follows you back in silence. You aren’t sure what you hope to accomplish by going to the one place you don’t have anywhere to be alone, but the Razor Crest has begun to feel like home. A safe space from the unknown and new territory of your new life. When you reach the hanger, Din opens the ramp and your feet carry you quickly into the dim interior.

The closing of the ramp behind you sets your heart racing. You make to head to the fresher when a gloved hand wraps around your wrist. Din pulls you around to face him, “Tell me what’s wrong, Cuyan.”

Your feet stop, but you don’t respond right away. How can you? You’re at a crossroads, feeling emotions you didn’t think you’d feel again. But, at the same time, what if you were just imagining things? What if what you were picking up wasn’t there in the first place? Your silence lingers long enough that Din places a crooked finger under your chin, once again lifting your eyes to his visor and sending sparks through you.

“I was so scared yesterday.” The admission slips from your lips as you stare where you think his eyes would be under the helmet. Time seems to slow as you open your mouth and more secrets begin spilling out. “I heard you hit the floor and my heart stopped. The whole damn world stopped, Din.”

His hand falls from your chin and hangs by his side. He goes still, helmet never leaving your face.

“It was my bounty, I should’ve followed him in. You got hurt because I made a bad call.” You’re desperately trying to keep the dam of tears from breaking as you finally tear your eyes from him and look down at your shoes. It wasn’t entirely what was bothering you, but it was close enough to settle the issue for today.

Din says your name so softly you nearly miss it. He takes a half step closer to you and you lift your gaze again to meet his. “You made exactly the call I would’ve made, Cuyan. Your instincts are good.”

Praise. The last thing you expected, but exactly what your soul needed to hear. Din raises his hand again and, for a moment, you think he’s going to place it on your cheek before it changes directions and pats your shoulder. “Really?”

“Really,” he nods, “I followed your call because I trust you.”

A small smile blooms on your lips at that. “Thank you, Din.”

You still have a few days before Karga expects the quarry back, but you and Din agree that getting Jafan to him early wouldn’t be the worst idea. You both ready the Crest for flight, securing various crates and anything that could be dangerous if it moved during your trip. You take a few minutes of solitude in the fresher, thinking about what Din said about trusting you. That prickling feeling in your chest returns, demanding to be recognized again after your acceptance last night, but this time you don’t feel lost or sad. You mull over the last couple of years with Arlon; the way he began pulling away from you shortly after proposing, the look in his eyes when he said goodbye to you for the last time on Randon… It all began making sense, seeing it in hindsight. That relationship was doomed from the start. It would never have mattered how much you worked or how hard you loved him; Arlon was never the man you were going to spend the rest of your life with.

Turning off the shower, you dry off and put your travel clothes on in the small space. Black leggings wrap your legs in buttery soft comfort and a plain, oversized tee shirt falls gently over your head. You give your hair a rough towel dry before hanging the towel back up and climbing into the cockpit.

“Ready when you are, Mandalorian,” you announce, dropping into your seat.

He gives you a playful, two-fingered salute before bringing the Crest to life. The rumbles of take-off gently give way to a low hum as you gain altitude and break into the atmosphere of Mon Cala. The ocean planet below you isn’t too far from Nevarro, so no lightspeed is needed on the journey back. You spend most of it in companionable silence.

Landing on the packed, hard ground of Nevarro, you and Din both stand to head down to the cargo hold.

“Oops, sorry-”

“Sorry, after-”

Both of you talk at the same time, bodies and words jumbling as you trip over your own feet trying to make room. Din reaches out and catches you, steadying you as a laugh escapes your lips.

“You okay?”

“I’m fine,” you laugh again. He lets go of your shoulders and motions for you to head down the ladder. He follows, once again taking the lead on the way into town.

Din heads straight for the same cantina you met Karga in last time. It’s later in the evening this time, though, so more bodies fill the space. Music encourages dancing, and droids wheel around tables and groups of people with trays of drinks.

“Back so soon? She must be good, Mando!” Karga’s voice booms from near the bar. You and Din make your way toward the smiling man. “If only all my hunters were this quick.”

You smile back, handing him the now quiet tracking fob. “He’s all yours, Karga.”

“I’ll have him offloaded right away.” Handing the fob to someone behind him, Karga relays the order and turns back toward the two of you. “Can I get you a drink?”

Din shakes his head but says, “Thank you.”

“I’ll take one!” You thank Karga as well as he hands you a glass of something light and bubbling. It smells like oranges, like the middle of summer by a lake. One sip of it sends tingles over your skin. “This is delicious!”

“It’s called a Cosmic Delight,” Karga clinks the rim of his glass with yours, “But be careful, they’re stronger than they taste.”

You nod and thank him again before he turns to discuss business with your Mandalorian companion. As they talk, you let yourself get lost in watching the patrons of the cantina. Your first impression of the Nevvarian people still held true; they were proud and strong people. But after a day of hard work, it seems that these people also love to play just as hard. Dartboards line one wall in the back, a make-shift poker table has been created in the heart of the room, and people all over the bar are rolling dice in games of chance.

“I want to play darts,” you announce, turning to look at Din and Karga. Din looks at you with his head tilted to the side. Darts? he seems to ask.

You nod before grabbing his hand and pulling him away from Karga. Weaving your way through the crowd, you pick the smallest group in front of the far board and say with a friendly smile, “I’ve got winner.”

The human man standing in front of you eyes Din warily before nodding. Turning back to his game, he and his friends finish the round and pull the darts from the board. “Care to make it interesting?”

“What do you mean?” you ask, the bubbles in your glass popping pleasantly on your upper lip as you take a drink.

“A bet,” the human says. He holds his hand out to shake, “The name’s Corr.”

You shake his hand and give him your name. Din, on the other hand, just stares him down.

Elbowing Din in the side, you turn your attention back to Corr and ask, “What kind of bet?”

“Oh nothing crazy,” he picks at his nails, “Loser has to buy next round.”

“You’re on.” You shake his hand again, a mischievous smile playing on your lips.

“Ladies first.”

You step up to the line, darts in hand. It’s been a while since you played bar games, but the Cosmic Delight has worked its way into your head and you feel lighter than air. Lining up your first shot, the dart sinks into the cork. You aren’t bad by any stretch of the imagination, but once Corr steps up to the line you realize you may have been a little bold. Two of his three shots hit the bullseye.

“Damn,” you laugh, stepping into position, “You’re good.”

The round continues and Corr blows you out of the water. “Time to pay up,” he jokes with you, finally loosening up around you and your silent companion.

“Alright, alright, a bet’s a bet.” You wave down one of the droids ferrying drinks and order another round, as well as another Cosmic Delight for yourself. “Mando, why don’t you play? I bet you’re a great shot.”

“I bet he’s got some sort of gadget in that helmet that would give him an unfair advantage,” Corr grumbles. His buddies nod along. With a dark grin, Corr continues, “But if you took it off, I’m sure we’d be more evenly matched.”

You go still as night, waiting for Din to respond. The blaster on your thigh almost seems to hum with anticipation as Din’s head turns to lock onto Corr’s face. The man had enough good sense to look nervous under the gaze of a Mandalorian.

The droid comes back with your drinks, breaking the tension for a moment. Everyone grabs their glasses as you say, “Well, gentlemen, it was nice to meet you but we should get going.” There was no graceful way out of the encounter anyway, so you just decided to pull Din away from the group and headed for a small, secluded table across the room.

“Sorry about that,” you say as you slide into the small booth.

“Why are you sorry?” Din replies, sliding in next to you.

“I was the one who wanted to play darts then they got all douchey.”

A snort leaves the modulator of his helmet, “They’re just assholes, not your fault.”

You nod and take another sip of your drink. “I’m gonna have to get the recipe for these so I can make one for you to try on the Crest.”

“A Cosmic Delight? I think I’m okay never having one.” His tone is light, teasing even. It sends those damn butterflies into a tizzy in your stomach.

“Hey now, this is delicious,” you insist, taking another sip. “It’s like… It’s like being able to drink that first sunset I saw here.”

He regards you for a moment before asking, “Why did you want to stay with me?”

The question throws you for a loop. The table was secluded enough to give you privacy, but the cantina was still full of people. “I… What do you mean?”

“Why did you want to stay with me?”

“Just repeating the question doesn’t really clear things up, Mando.”

“You could’ve asked anyone to train you. Hired someone on Randon or asked Tonis. But you asked me. Why?”

You’re silent for a minute, lightly tracing the rim of your glass with your fingertip. “It just… Felt right.”

Din seems satisfied enough to nod and lean back in his seat. You take the moment to look at him as he takes in the room. The dim light shines off his beskar, hiding different planes in shadow while highlighting others. The curves of his shoulders and chest plate gleam and outline his broad form. He’s leaning back, arm draped across the back of the cushion, fingers idly tracing patterns along the soft fabric.

Before logic could stop you, your liquor-loosened tongue betrays you by saying, “Has anyone told you how beautiful you are?”

Your cheeks immediately burn as his head snaps to yours and you bury your face in your drink, looking anywhere other than the man sitting beside you. “What?”

“Nothing,” you squeak, “Ignore me.”

He laughs softly, “Thank you, Cuyan.”

You wave him away with a hand, turning to survey the rest of the room.

The rest of the night progresses nicely, even after an embarrassing slip. Din doesn’t bring it up again and you’re content to pretend it didn’t happen. You continue to talk through the evening, Karga coming over to join you for a bit before heading off to another group. You slow down on the drinks and, by the time you and Din are making your way back to the Razor Crest, your head is once again clear as the sky above you.

The stars twinkle overhead as the ramp lowers at the command from Din’s vambrace. Before stepping inside, you both stop to stare at the sky.

“I never realized that the stars would be different somewhere else,” you comment, eyes wide in awe. “They’re beautiful.”

“Almost as beautiful as me?” Din asks. Your jaw drops and you whip around to look at him.

“Uhm… Well…”

He laughs, the sound full and bright even through the modulator. “Relax, I’m just joking with you.” He walks up the ramp and into the Crest, leaving you alone. Shaking your head and allowing yourself to laugh at the events of the night, you follow him in.

As you’re getting ready for bed, you pass him leaving the fresher and heading toward the ladder. Din stops you with a hand on your shoulder.

“You’ve done well with training and all of this. I want to make sure you know that.”

“Thank you, Din.” You smile up at him.

Before you get a chance to walk away, his hand leaves your shoulder and lightly cups your jaw. The touch sends fire through your veins and your heart begins to pound. He only lingers a moment before leaving you standing in the light of the fresher and climbing into the cockpit.

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[kivaember]

random ac6 coffee shop au drabble hgh

MY BRAIN IS LIKE A NOODLE FROM WORK so here's a cute brainless coffee shop au drabble

The birds were singing, insects were chirping, and there wasn't a single cloud in the summer's sky, the day warm but not unpleasantly hot, and a beautiful vista stretching out from the public car park that Rusty had parked his jeep in.

Raven took the whole thing in with a distinct feeling of dread.

"The parking's free on Sunday," Rusty chattered happily, oblivious to his boyfriend mentally compiling his will. He pulled out a rucksack from the jeep's boot and easily slung it onto his shoulders, before holding out Raven's smaller and far lighter backpack. "So we can take all the time we need for our hike."

Raven nodded wearily and accepted his backpack. It contained two 2L water bottles, his lunch, as well as a few snacks, and a waterproof jacket, despite the good weather. Rusty had been very serious when he said that no matter where they hiked to, they should always prepare for bad weather. Raven just thought he was carrying extra weight for no reason.

But he had no one to blame but himself. When Rusty had excitedly asked him last week if he wanted to go on a 'nice, easy hike' with him on Sunday, Raven had unthinkingly agreed, always happy to spend time with his boyfriend. However, as the day approached, Raven gradually realised that he and Rusty had two very different definitions of a 'hike'.

Raven thought it'd be a short, pleasant walk in the countryside, two hours tops, and it'd be mostly flat. Rusty thought a 'nice, easy hike' was stomping up the mountain just outside of southern Xylem that was 'affectionately' called The Wall, due to its sheer verticality in some parts. Of course there was a path that could be walked by anyone with functioning legs, but the hike was expected to take almost TWO HOURS to get to the SUMMIT. FOUR HOURS IN TOTAL. TO WALK UP AND DOWN. A MOUNTAIN.

Raven, who was out of breath just climbing a single flight of stairs, quietly despaired.

Rusty, the evil tempress that had lured Raven to this uniquely cruel and unusual torture, beamed at him, clearly excited for the day. Raven didn't have the heart to admit to him that he was going to hate every moment of this. He can endure this, to protect that smile. He'll... he'll climb this mountain... for Rusty.

So, weakly, he smiled back.

"I've plotted our route," Rusty said, as they began to walk towards where the public footpath began from the car park. "I made sure to pick the easiest one, so you won't have to climb up any steep parts... if you get tired, let me know, alright? If it comes to it I can carry you no problem until you catch your breath."

Rusty held out his phone, which had a satnav app already marking out their route. Raven hid a grimace when he saw the '9.56 miles remaining!' at the top of the screen.

"You've got your inhaler, right?" Rusty asked, and Raven quickly nodded at that. He actually over-prepared and brought two. "Okay, good. I know you said you're fine with exercise but... really, let me know if you get tired."

Well, Raven was pretty sure exercise didn't trigger his respiratory problems, but he'd never actually... exercised to really test that out. Did a short one hundred metre jog count as exercise? It must do, right?

He kept that question to himself, though, gripping the straps of his backpack as they left the solid comfort of tarmac and onto the dusty, rocky dirt path that led towards the mountain. While things were still flat and manageable, Raven did take a moment to look about himself, admire the scenery, that sort of thing (it might be the last thing he'll ever see, after all).

Raven had never really left Xylem before today. He'd been to a few parks, and he had a very foggy memory from when he was a child where Michigan had dragged him and Walter to the beach that one time, but he hadn't really been dumped into the middle of nature like this before. It smelled different to the city, looked different, and sounded different.

It was nice.

Enough so that he briefly forgot he was meant to be dreading this whole hike, and happily kept pace with Rusty who was kindly moderating his strides to be short and slow just for him. Raven felt a burst of affection for him, abruptly, realising that he was very lucky to have such a considerate boyfriend like Rusty, even if he was insane and liked to climb mountains in his spare time... what a weirdo (fond)...

Things changed when they started hitting The Incline.

It was gradual, gentle enough that Raven didn't notice it at first, but then it sloped upwards sharply, and within minutes Raven was sweating, panting and valiantly trying to ignore the burn in his legs.

Rusty, of course, noticed. "Uh, buddy, are you okay?"

Raven made an off-hand sign for {fine}, stubbornly glaring down the path as he took another quad-burning step.

"I mean, it's just, you're looking a bit red there-"

Another step. Oh god. This was so hard. Rusty did this for fun?!

"-and I can hear you wheezing."

But Rusty had looked forward to this all week... no, no Raven will not surrender, he won't give in! He'll succeed! He'll finish this hike!! Bolstered by deranged motivation, Raven took two more wobbling steps.

"And you're sweating buckets..."

Argh, actually, this might be too much for him. They had to have done at least a mile, right? That meant he just had to do eight miles at most. If he can think of it like that, then he can do it, right? Right?!

Desperately clinging onto this hope, Raven signed a bit haphazardly: {How far? Distance????}

"Buddy..." Rusty slowed to a stop. "We've only done three hundred metres."

Raven staggered to a halt as well and stared, dismayed.

"I mean, you can still see the carpark..."

Rusty turned and pointed, and Raven followed where his finger was indicating, seeing that, yes, indeed, the carpark was right there, well in view. Rusty's jeep sparkled under the sun, a siren call of 'you can give up now and leave~~~~'

He was so, so tempted.

Rusty's expression was both amused and rueful when he looked back at him, rubbing the back of his neck. "Uh, if you want to call it there... we can. I mean, there's a lake not too far from there. We can walk around that instead. It's fine!"

So, so, so tempted....!!!!

{No,} Raven signed stubbornly, tilting his jaw and daring Rusty to argue with him. {I said I'd hike. I'm going to the summit. With or without you.}

"..." Rusty shook his head with a bit of a laugh. "Raven..."

{Witness me,} Raven proclaimed a bit deliriously, and resumed his arduous treck up the mountain path, huffing and puffing like a beaten up car engine on its last legs.

"Raven! C'mon..."

Raven kept going.

----------

...for about one hundred metres, before he gave up and lied down on the ground, staring up at the blue sky with Rusty staring down at him.

{Leave me for the birds,} Raven signed solemnly, and pointed at the vulture he could see circling above. He could hear how his breaths wheezed in his struggling lungs, his heart thundering to its very limits to keep him alive for these parting words (handsigns.... whatever). {I'll return... to the circle of life...}

"Okay, I think it's inhaler time," Rusty said with some amusement, and bent down to rudely roll Raven onto his side to get into his backpack. "Hm, you should really put it somewhere more accessible... ah! Got it!"

Rusty rolled him onto his back and handed him his inhaler. Sulkily, Raven took a puff (he felt himself inch away from death's door).

"So," Rusty said, as Raven came down from his delirious, oxygen-deprived high. "Lake?"

Raven rested his inhaler against his chest. {Lake.}

[guiraguira]

Yo ! Kiria here ....

Saw your ask box was open so......

Mweh eheheheheh

Could you do a Doppo oneshot where he's super clingy with his manga artist girlfriend while Gentaro is speaking to her and being 'touchy' ( asking her about her latest issue ) . Once they get home all he wants is cuddles and if she goes ANYWHERE he's following like a lost puppy

PLEASE COULD YOU PLEASE DO THIS

😇😇😇😢😢😢💜💜💜💜👉👈👉👈

Hi Kiria!!

you are my first request! I think I strayed a bit from the original idea. I tried to make everything smooth, because it seemed to me that it should be so! .Also several different ways to approach this request, maybe I will modify and publish them at some point.

Doppo needs attention ✨

Doppo x fem reader. (only healthy things)

~~~~

�� After so much time they could finally enjoy a little today, it was the first day off for both of them in a long time and they would make the most of it until night.

° They had gone out for lunch, also enjoying strolling through a lovely park in the afternoon, which had a nice secluded area where they could rest in silence for a long time.

° With Doppo's head on your shoulder and his arm encircling your waist while you gently massage his thigh with the hand that has rested in that place for a long time and sporadically share affectionate kisses on each other's body. They believe that the day could not be more beautiful.

°They decide that although they had planned to have dinner out to complete the day, returning home now would be more pleasant. Doppo with the social anxiety of him and you being a mangaka weren't in the element of him spending a lot of time away from home.

°So they take the first train home, luckily it's almost empty choosing a seat where they can continue secretly with their pampering. Suddenly you hear him make a small moan and you don't understand until you see Gentaro approaching.

° "Hey, Y/o right? We met one day when events from our editors coincided" he shamelessly sat next to you too, provoking another complaint from Doppo.

° "Nice to see you again" he says, kissing the back of your hand in the best old-fashioned gentleman style, making you visibly uncomfortable. In response Doppo kisses the back of your other hand and entwines it with you.

°Ignoring the reaction of both, Gentaro continued talking to you as if they were close friends. "Ah, I like your last chapter, the way the protagonist expresses his thoughts..." the conversation continued banally but with constant demands from Doppo, he rests your other hand on his knee, waiting for you to massage it and you do so , squeezing gently.

° "The kissing part is really good too, especially the hot look they give each other at the end.." by now you wanted to leave, you know he probably meant it without double meaning but he's ruining your moment with your boy "did you use some reference to make lips look so pretty?"

°The look he gave you was getting a bit strange but luckily they had arrived at their station and Doppo almost took you running away from Gentaro.

ahh~ you already knew what would happen when they get home…

° Immediately after crossing the hall I hug you tight rubbing his head against yours and tickling your hair, "I know, but don't worry, he's always weird…" you say kissing his forehead "He's not going to ruin my day no no no no…" he started his spiral of sadness and you stopped him before it got any worse by rocking side to side with him.

° When you thought the hug was hard enough, you separated to start preparing dinner, but Doppo wanted more, he followed you closely and tried to hug you again, but you couldn't cook with him like that. So you sent him to sit down.

° From that moment on, his eyes, inattentive to him, followed your actions, begging you to give him a caress. It was impossible not to feel sorry, every time you passed near him he tried to reach you dramatizing even more accompanied by regrets. You just gave his hair a tender shake and went about your business.

°This situation was repeated for some time. At some point the cries sounded so similar to those of a puppy that you pointed it out. "Honey, you almost sound like a puppy with those noises"

° "Woof .."… You drop the knife turning quickly to see his face "did you just?..." With teary eyes and his head resting on the table, it was the representation of abandonment. In response to your question, he only barked again.

Forget about making dinner after that.

°Finally you gave in and took him to the couch with him throwing small barks of happiness... maybe...

°Her body lying on yours and firmly squeezed, kept you in your place. I crossed his arms behind your back and rubbed his head against your chest, little tears trickling down his cheeks as he gave you another woof.

° "ohhhh, my cute puppy I promise to make it up to you today" you rocked him caressing his back and wiping his tears with your fingers. For the first time he didn't bark back but instead buried his head deeper into your chest and gave you a vague kiss on his clothes.

[floydsmuse]

Ah Meggy at long last it seems we have a Calvin thought/thot!!!!!!! (lol). I have long awaited this day because I know you're gonna love it.

It's a really hot day in early summer, all yours and Calvin's classes have let out for the summer and luckily for the both of you, neither of you have to teach summer courses and can enjoy your time together with Baby Ellen. Unfortunately the heat wave that's hit is a little less than pleasant and the air conditioning has been running all day and all night, but poor Ellen's been extra fussy as a result (lol).

You two decide that it's definitely time to go swimming because both your husband and your baby are getting a little cranky (lol). You two decide to take her to the local pool to cool off and it was the best decision you two could have ever made. Everybody thinks she's the cutest little baby in her swim clothes (not gonna lie, you saw Calvin in his shorts and you both got that look in your eyes, lol). Calvin's holding onto her as he gently bobs up and down in the water with her and blowing his cheeks out to make her giggle. Maybe a few of your girls from the nursing major are around and they're taking little polaroid photos of their niece.

When Ellen's a little bit older, you and Cal decide to take her and Six-Thirty on a little trip to your old stomping grounds on Sanibel Island down in Florida. It's mornings spent on the beach collecting shells (Sanibel Island is known for its beaches having millions and millions of shells everywhere), strolls in the downtown Fort Meyers area, ice cream for dinner on the hottest nights and plenty of time to swim in the warm ocean. Six-Thirty gets plenty of time to play fetch and go for a morning run with Cal although you do laugh whenever Ellen and Six-Thirty chase the seagulls away from the sea turtle nests (lol).

Calvin also gets plenty of time to row out on the open ocean too which is nothing compared to doing it on a lake (lol). His father's very best friend was a rowing coach for Florida State and to your surprise, they were in the area for a competition against one of the colleges in Tampa and he even let Cal join in on the practice (lol).

But the biggest surprise came one day when you and Calvin were relaxing on the beach one morning just before lunch. Six-Thirty was splashing around in the water and Ellen was digging in the sand with her little shovel and pale and suddenly came running up to you with what looked like a gold coin in her hand. When you saw Calvin's eyes go wide, you knew something was up (lol).

"Honey, this is real gold."

"Wait, what?"

"This is real, actual gold, go ahead, feel it!"

You were shocked beyond words, more so when Six-Thirty started helping Ellen dig and they found even more!! You and Calvin knew that something was definitely up and decided to yet again phone a friend (lol).

It wasn't long before you and Calvin discovered that your secluded little beach spot held a very impressive secret. Not far from the beach line, under at least 70ft of water, lay the wreck of a pirate ship from the 1700s and that had once belonged to the famous Captain Kidd and had been wrecked in a hurricane after his crew had buried part of their treasure on the island (lol). So now every year when you guys go back, you not only dig for treasure on the beach and go to see it at the little museum, but you also got the opportunity to go and scuba dive on the wreck too.

Meggy this came to me shortly after I went to bed last night. I've been on the worst Treasure Island/Pirates Of The Caribbean kick lately and I think it's gonna start showing (lol).

Mary! hehe yay! more Calvin thoughts :) i’m super excited to read what you’ve sent in my love! <3

~ aww! i’m so glad wifey & Cal get some much needed time off to spend with Ellen! ugh heat waves are the worst! being super hot, sticky, & uncomfortable is such a gross feeling :/ especially when you can’t find the proper relief & nothing seems to be helping! i’ve been there plenty of times before haha!

~ swimming is such a fun & great way to cool off! aww Ellen & Calvin both being cranky😅 like father like daughter truly!! when Cal gets cranky, you know it’s bad BAD haha! awe! could just picture Ellen in her little bathing suit with some floaties on :,) Calvin’s wearing these short & tight swim trunks that really accentuates his thighs & practically makes wifey short circuit 🫠 just thinking about Calvin & Ellen playing around in the water & yes! Cal is def being silly & puffing his cheeks out to hear baby El’s bubbly giggles :,)

~ oohh! family vacation to Florida! sounds fun !! i love collecting shells on the beach too ! i could also picture Ellen finding jellyfish all along the shore & giving each of them names! i can just see her being super into sea life/sea creatures :)

“strolls in the downtown Fort Meyers area, ice cream for dinner on the hottest nights and plenty of time to swim in the warm ocean.”

~ all of this sounds amazing! makes me miss the summer so much😭! aww playing fetch with Six-Thirty is wonderful & i love the part where you mentioned Six-Thirty & Ellen chasing the seagulls! i’m just trying to picture this in my head & it’s making me chuckle out loud! Cal getting to practice his rowing is such a great addition to the trip too!!

~ Ellen finding real gold coins in the sand ?! woahhh! that’s so cool! she’s like a little treasure hunter for real ☺️ i love it. also love Six-Thirty stepping up to help her dig them out! A PIRATE SHIP !!! ahh Mary! a nod to the Goonies me thinks ?! AMAZING ! i love the little backstory you added behind it too! omg & they get to scuba dive down to the wreck?! this is so awesome & such a creative thought! i’m in love with it seriously! :)))

Mary, you seriously blew me away with these thoughts! i loved reading them so much & was smiling all the way through !! as always, thank you for sending them in! 🥰💕 i’m looking forward to see what you come up next !!!

[ellies-cycling-notes]

Day 22: Kalamazoo to Warren Dunes

Distance Covered: 88.10 miles

Total Time (including rests): 9:09 (8:21am-5:30pm)

Time spent riding: 6:51

Average Speed: 12.9 mph

Apples Eaten: 4 (honeycrisp - 7/10, honeycrisp - 6.5/10, honeycrisp - 7/10, honeycrisp - 7/10)

An alright ride today. I took a route that was rather out of the way, cause it spent a lot of time on bike trails. It was hot again today, for the first time in a while, but I had good shade for a decent amount of it. I took the ride a little slow, taking 3 evenly spaced, rather long breaks about every 20-25 miles.

The time on bike trails was rather pleasant, except for that the Kal-Haven trail (from Kalamazoo to South Haven) was closed for the last 15 miles, which my mapping app didn't know, so I had to reroute onto state roads. The wind wasn't too bad most of the time, even when it was a headwind.

Of my 3 stops, the only one of note was the second, where I stopped at a Culver's for lunch and spent about an hour there. I got a cheeseburger and a chocolate concrete, which were both rather good (Culver's is probably one of the only fast food places I actually like). I might actually stop by another one for lunch tomorrow, cause I'm running low on food, don't want to do a shopping run, they have food I enjoy and am slightly craving, and usually have an outdoor place to eat, so I can put my bike there and won't have to worry about watching it. I'll probably make the actual decision on the ride tomorrow.

Wow, I can't really believe that tomorrow is the last day. It's been a good trip, especially the second half, and I'm kinda relieved it's coming to an end. Part of me will miss these posts, but as I mentioned awhile back, sometimes the stress of thinking about what to write gets to me.

I spent a lot of today's ride just focusing on the riding. Normally what I do is compartmentalize it as I ride, thinking about how far I have to go, and how that can be expressed in smaller or larger terms, and then by the time I've finished thinking that way, I check how far I've traveled, and repeat the process. It's not something I'm good at describing, cause it's something that just happens, without me thinking consciously about it.

I'm staying at the Warren Dunes Campground today, and it's the first of my campgrounds which I've stayed at before. It's just how I remember it, down to being laden with mosquitoes. I've had to slap quite a few, and I'll have to make sure none get in my tent, but other than that, atmospherically, this is one of my favorite campgrounds. Despite that, it's probably one of the ones I'll spend the least time at, cause I got here somewhat late, and I expect I'll leave somewhat early tomorrow, given it will be my last day.

Design Notes

I did quite a bit of design-thinking today, mostly about Cardcasting. I think I've mentioned it before, but I'll be going into a slightly deeper dive here.

Cardcasting

Cardcasting is a card-based magic system, intended (probably) for a tabletop roleplaying game. The way magic works in this system is that spellcaster have a deck of element/mana cards, which they draw from to determine what spells they can cast. Each card has an element on it, and counts as a quantity of "1" of that type/element of mana.

There are seven elements divided up according to 2 supercategories:

Action - describes how the type of mana interacts with a substance, the categories are Creation & Destruction

Substance - describes what type of substance is being interacted with, categories are Matter, Energy, and Soul

Thus, we have the elements of "Create Matter (CM)", "Create Energy (CE)", "Create Soul (CS)", "Destroy Matter (DM)", "Destroy Energy (DE)", and "Destroy Soul (DS)". The seventh element, which does not fit into any of the categories, is "Dimensional", or "Spatial/Temporal (ST)", which deals with manipulations of space and time.

Spellcasters (the term used for anyone who uses an Element deck) cast spells by drawing a certain number of element cards from their deck, and using some number of those to cast a spell which uses the drawn type/quantity of elements. Each spell has a level, determined by how many element cards are needed to cast it.

I don't yet have a good idea of the scale of spells with regards to spell level, which largely stems from the multielemental nature of most spells. For example, take a spell that sculpts stone. It could require just CM mana, as one creates stone in a certain shape, or it could require just DM mana, to remove bits from a block of stone, which would probably be the more efficient option. However, it's probably even more efficient to cast that type of spell using both CM & DM mana, allowing for refining of the shape of the stone in more ways than just chiseling away. However, that means that the spell requires at least 1 CM card and at least 1 DM card, so it automatically must be at least a level 2 spell. As such, it is difficult to find a spell that makes sense as a level 1 spell, for it truly has to be most efficient as a single-element spell.

I do have level 0 spells, or cantrips. These are spells which are cast using a card from your deck, but the card is then returned to the deck, so all they really require is that you know how to use that type of mana. Some examples include:

Timer - A dimensional cantrip that sets a timer in your mind to notify you when a certain amount of time has passed.

Calm Self - a destroy soul cantrip that calms rampant emotions in oneself. Has no effect on magically-induced emotions.

Match - a create energy cantrip that creates a small spark for a flame where you touch. If not used on something extremely flammable (like paper), the touched object will not catch fire. Does not really have combat utility.

Another example of spell I've thought of that becomes more effective/efficient as more elements are added to cast it is a simple healing spell, used to heal a cut with a knife (just as an example). At the lowest level, it would either be a CM spell, in which case you recreate the flesh covering the wound, essentially forcibly forming a scab, or a CS spell, which would help close the wound internally and deal with the pain, but would do nothing to the appearance from outside/possible future wounds in the same spot. Combine the two, and now you have a spell that fully heals the wound and make it look good as new. Then, if you add in ST magic, you are able to simulate a speeding-up of the healing process by manipulating time, allowing for a heal that has a lower chance of becoming a vulnerable spot or getting infected, because it's as if the wound has healed naturally in a sterilized environment. And this isn't even getting into the craziness of adding DM to kill any infections that might already be there, CE to help the bloodflow through the wound, etc. I'm starting to feel like this system may be too open-ended.

I also want to talk a little bit about spellcasters getting stronger in Cardcasting. I'll note that I don't actually know the mechanics of how Spellcasters become stronger, just that if they were to become stronger, these are things that would chnage. Spellcasters have either 3 or 4 axes upon which they can get stronger, depending on how you look at it, and each of those has its own downsides.

Learn more spells - the simplest way for a spellcaster to become stronger is to learn more spells. This one doesn't actually have much of a downside, but it doesn't really increase the strength of a spellcaster, just their versatility. Learning higher level spells is a different point.

Cast spells faster - when a spellcaster casts a spell, they spend a certain amount of time drawing a certain number of cards. If they are able to draw more cards faster, they will be able to cast higher level spells at a rate closer to how they used to be able to cast lower level spells, making them stronger. This has the downside of causing a spellcaster to run through their deck more quickly, so they can't cast as many spells in succession before needing to rest.

Have a larger pool of mana - a spellcaster's pool of mana determines how many spells they can cast before needing to rest, and is essentially the same as the size of their deck. If a spellcaster is able to add more cards to their deck, they will be able to cast more spells between breaks. However, this will decrease the consistency of their deck, as with a larger deck you are less likely to draw the exact element you need.

Versatility of mana - this is the axis that might not actually be considered its own upside. Spellcaster can learn how to harness more elements, which might allow them more versatility in the spells they can cast, but similarly to the last point, it would also greatly diminish the consistency of their deck.

Hope you enjoyed my rambling thoughts today! One more day, then I'm home free!

Previous -- Today's Pictures -- Next

[bugginoutofthisworld]

SUN DOGS - from Tales From the Dickt: Cumplete Edition

-

“I know that what you call ‘God’ really exists, but not in the form you think; God is primal cosmic energy, the love in your body, your integrity, and your perception of the nature in you and outside of you” - Wilhelm Reich, 1945.

The energy manifested in that public restroom on that harrowing day was unlike any conceived before. Its limestone, tile walls had become washed with a lavender hue and the air itself took on the limber physicality of waves in the ocean. Swathes of people sat on the sticky, urine-soaked floors and gawked in amazement at something that beheld a capacity for beauty which was not meant to be seen by human optics. I had been engrossed in its divine aura for an afternoon so long it seemed like it would never end, oh how I wish it had.

Customer service is a dehydrating occupation, it begets the kind of thirst that can only be quenched by diet coke and bi-hourly smoke breaks. It’s the kind of career that demands you forgo the physical sensations of poor health and consume inhibitors that provide you with fleeting feelings of energy. Generally, working customer service is like taking deep breaths at the summit of a high mountain, bad for you.

I liked to occupy myself on lunch breaks with a book. In equal parts due to my love for literature, and also the complex character it presents to the boy in the bakery I've wanted to scramble my insides since the day I started working there. I was remiss that day to have to end my time with Kafka’s The Trial sooner than I’d like because of how my bladder berated me that it needed emptying. My assumption that not drinking water for four hours would correlate to less bathroom breaks couldn’t have been more wrong.

An empty bathroom is always a pleasant place to be. Ever since an uncomfortable middle school locker room interaction where a boy a year older than me laughed at the size of my flaccid penis I’ve been detrimentally pee-shy. It wasn’t until earlier this year I was finally able to use the urinal without having to add numbers in my head in order to suppress the fears that filled my blood stream with adrenaline. As I pissed I thought of how far I’d come in my journey with public restrooms. It's a frightening place, but when you work at a grocery store any vacant space is a safe one. While washing my hands at the sink an older gentleman walked in. He was of the decrepit type. His cane bent and creaked like an old tree as he shifted his weight onto it with every other step.

Much like me, he’d gone for a piss. I jumped when as I was leaving, he shouted in regret. The old tree lost its battle to the violent winds.

“No! No! No!” He yelled. The old man fell onto the floor with the kind of force that makes you want to avert your gaze it looks so painful. With embarrassment his face grew red and hot, he groaned and writhed on the floor.

“Sir!” Shouted I, concerned. I knelt beside him.

“Please don’t.” He grabbed for my shoulder. But it was too late. My eyes trailed down his shirt, wet with piss, to his exposed lower stomach, following the hairs that went from his outie-belly button and into his pubes, and landed my gaze on his cock. His wonderful cock. The magnum opus of all God’s creation. A blue halo of plasm shone from his genitals. It waved from east to west to east to west like a dowsing rod scanning the room for information. Words cannot describe the influence of the old man's junk. Human words would simply be reductive to the inexplicable effect of his cock.

A later player would verbalize its effect as being “like that of something with an extra dimension our eyes are too rudimentary to perceive.” The later player stepped into the bathroom, momentarily aghast.

“What the…” he trailed off. His hard, leather exterior was in a single moment

completely disarmed. He’d fallen to his knees and like a child toward the cookie it salivated over crawled impishly at the old man and myself. Not a word was spoken by him, the motorbike man, he could not steer his eyes from the trance the old man's cock had upon him. Tears welled and spilled from the ducts of his eyes and caressed his cheeks like the loving hand of a mother.

“Sir?” I asked.

“Oh god no.” Murmured the old man.

With the application of his large, callused fingers, the motorbike man swiped at his eyes and presented to us both the contact lenses he had just removed. No sooner had the significance of that fourth dimension become any clearer.

“I can see again,” the motorbike man said as he swallowed a large globule of phlegm and pride.

“You stay here,” I told the man. Leaving the side of the older gentleman and having exited the bathroom. I pondered the nearby dairy aisle for the sort of person who might prove this hypothesis. Who stared at the shelf of cottage cheese but a man whose arm was slung in a cast. “Excuse me?” I asked him as I neared.

“Huh?”

“I work here and I was just wondering,” thinking, “if you’d be interested in trying a new flavor of cottage cheese?”

“What flavor?”

“Uhhh,” thinking, “colby jack.” I said, with the type of unsteady confidence that led my statement to sounding like it should have ended with a question mark.

“Sure.” Responded the mad cow man, indifferent. Without another word I led him into the bathroom where the motorbike man still wept and the old man still lay in agony. “Why are we in a bathroom?” He asked.

“Uhhh,” the presence of the cock seemed to have quickened my wit, “it's an inbetween place, so you won’t be influenced by outside stimuli when you taste the cottage cheese and thus provide us with an unreliable and biased opinion.” My ability to sell cheese had filled me with pride.

“Okay.”

“But real quick I need you to step over here and lower yourself-” I hadn’t needed to finish. The orgonic energy of the cock had mesmerized the mad cow man and he was on the floor without a moment's hesitation.

“Oh my god,” he said. “Holy shit.” His arm wriggled in its sling and he pulled it free, waving it around and grasping at the air with his healed fingers as if that capacity of movement in that arm was completely foreign to him. There was a knock at the door. I’d opened it and was amazed to see a line of people compelled by the overwhelming energy that leaked into the store and compelled them to the space.

A pimply lady lowered her acne-ridden face toward the cock and the zits fell from her face like apples shaken from a tree. The scars of cysts past receded and healed flesh took its place. She left the bathroom and had scrawled three different phone numbers on her palm before she’d even completed the length of the line.

An athletically footed man removed his shoes and crusty, matted socks. Before the smell could even permeate the air the color of his feet had maneuvered from browns and greens back to a healthy tan and peach.

Hemorrhoids hung like bunches of grapes from the anus of someone who’d preoccupied themselves too much with fissure-causing anal sex. The grapes shriveled to raisins and plopped onto the floor. The person left the bathroom already in communication with the next person who might once more tear up their freshly healed sphincter.

As if she were sketching a ladder on her arm, a depressed girl with rungs of scars on her wrists rested her forehead near the crotch of the old man. Static connected between the two. Her heart pounded less ferociously against the cage of her ribs and she left the bathroom with a smile.

There was a mid-pubescent boy who’d come in soon after desperate to rid himself of the homosexual thoughts that plagued his mind. His dick was erect as he locked eyes with the penis of the old man but the blood had returned to his system after not more than a minute in communications with the whispers of the cock. His walk had less of a faggy-swish to it and the limp in his wrist had straightened itself.

A lady who hacked out her words as they dodged the lodgings of gunk in her lungs and throat when she spoke had snapped the cigarette tucked behind her ear in half after she’d spent a moment with her bosom near the cock.

A couple struggling with impotencey and infertility had gushed their problems to the therapeutic boober of the old man and left the bathroom having mastered the art of conception.

Hours in the bathroom came and went like vignettes of experience. Time progressed as if it were an anecdote being recounted at the end of a long and fulfilling life. As the couple left I asked them, “tell the next person in line just to wait a minute.” And alone once more in the bathroom was me and the old man.

“Feeling alright, kid?”

“No, honestly.” A monumental strangeness had overwhelmed my senses. The muscles in my face were stretched strenuously as I swallowed wave after wave of salty saliva. The rain pattern of my head had elevated from a drizzle to a hurricane. The symbiosis of my health and the power of the old man's dick had quickly become a negative relationship.

I’d darted for the toilet in an experience which felt like flipping through photos in an album. Just single moments of delirious nausea. Vomit climbed to the apex of my throat and I’d sprayed a gust of it all over the back of the toilet. A chain reaction was occurring which had caused the entire contents of my stomach to evacuate in a single motion. I gagged, choked on bile, and sweat swept in from the side of my face and stung my dry, red eyes. The atmosphere of the bathroom was dancing like the beating of the sun on hot pavement. Consciousness slipped through my fingers like snot through thin tissue.

The sound of gale-wind storms echoed within the pitch-black chamber that was once the bathroom at the back of a grocery store, whose waters had run dry and air had gone stale. Headache like the ricochet of a bullet off concrete which bounced around a vacuum of space. I’d gathered myself and stood with the weak knees that reminded me of the old man's cane. Where had he gone? My knowledge of the bathroom's floor plan was so familiar I was able to follow the length of the wall and make my way to the door.

On the other side was a landscape completely alien to the midwest environments I’d been used to. Dunes of sand piled high into the dark, navy distance and whipped in a flurry so strong I wasn’t sure I could stand it. In the distance lighting cracked and thunder roared. With my shoes tossed aside I ventured into the desert.

Grains of sand beat at my face so strong every half minute I’d assessed it for lacerations. No blood spilled but I’d come to realize that the force of the sand was such that it could create scars and congeal them just as quick. The muscles in the arch of my foot ached as they strained to climb the impossible walls of sand. I’d ascend a dune and frustratingly slide back down as the earth below me avalanched under my weight. All around me were flipped cars and loose groceries that would soon disappear under the sands forever. I finally reached the summit of the largest dune.

There he was.

Not alone.

Knelt at the feet of a beast.

His own pious devotion.

“Sir!” I exclaimed, still enamored by his potential. The exclamation caught both him and the beast by surprise, and they turned to me with bright rubies in their ferocious eyes. Inaudible to me, the old man moved his mouth but the sound lost itself within the fury of the sandstorm. Nearer and nearer to them I slowly grew until finding myself directly behind the old man and tapped him on the shoulder. He spun his head around. His eyes now a fury of green flame. I looked past him, and saw what I shouldn’t.

The motorbike man had previously remarked something to the effect of, “the old mans dick has the effect of something with an added dimension that our eyes are too plain to see,” at this moment the old man held something in his hand which had spilled drool onto his chin and made his eyes red. What he held were the beast's genitals, which had inspired a similarly grand feeling as the old mans, but in the opposite direction.

Like a mirage, they vanished into the dust and darkness, but not before the beast could utter a final, single, chilling phrase.

“A little privacy please?” With the conclusion of the last syllable they congruently disappeared.

Home was now possibly dimensions away, although it had just been down the road, I’d never found it. And for the rest of time, for as long as it took the sun to die I remained in the whipping sands. Eating nothing but bags of chips and cans of beans. Not once for the eternity that consumed me did sexuality ever cross my mind,

how could it?

[slowtravelingcat]

The sun that will never set

Monday, June 14th, 2021

CAL - Today I write to you from yet another windowsill. This is the 3rd window on which I have perched in the last 2 weeks. Sometimes I wonder if the large, bald one really has lost her mind. 

MICHELE - If I am being truly honest I spent nearly half of this week on the phone with Airbnb and trying to find new housing. Unsurprisingly Alaska in the summer has a pretty tight housing market. By Friday evening I had finally identified an available room at Extended Stay America which would open up on Saturday night. I found this solution acceptable and, in the meantime, I was off to see some glaciers!

Saturday morning started off with some light packing and by mid-afternoon, I was off on a pleasant drive up to the Matanuska Glacier, just 2 hours outside of Anchorage. I booked a guided tour over text message with a company called “Glacier Tours”.

Upon arrival, I encountered a gravel road with numerous warning signs. Alongside the warning signs were directions to the tour office, so I cautiously forged ahead. After checking into the office, I drove another 2 miles down a deserted, dirt road before landing at a tent about a quarter-mile from the face of the glacier. What a sight! 

I was quickly outfitted with a helmet and crampons (strap-on cleats for walking on ice). Our tour turned out to be a group of 7 women, including the guide. We enjoyed a 2-hour walk, of which roughly one hour took place on top of the white ice of the glacier. It is truly otherworldly as almost no life exists on the ice. The guide pointed out something called “glacier moss” which is a rare instance of life on the glacier and is formed from bird droppings. At one point we are allowed to fill up our water bottles with glacier water and I make sure to drink every single drop. 

The evening is coming fast as I drive back to Anchorage, but I do not have to worry about driving the mountain roads in the dark as the sun never sets. 

Due to poor planning on my behalf, I ended up moving into our new housing on Saturday evening around 10pm. Between the effort and excitement of moving, I am just barely closing my eyes before my Sunday morning alarm at 4:45am. It’s time to see another glacier!

While I am very groggy the bright morning sun tricks me into moving forward. I board the Alaska Railroad at 6am for a trip to Spencer Lake! Around 11am our small group of 8 kayakers launched for exploration of the face of Spencer Glacier.  

The lake is only accessible by train and is completely secluded. We are the only people within miles. Our guide explains that due to the ice floor, the lake remains at 32 degrees Fahrenheit throughout the summer. As we launch our boats I notice that I am surrounded by little ice cubes. It’s like we’re boating in a glass of ice water! 

Several magnificent icebergs float near our launch point. They are each uniquely shaped and give off varying degrees of a faint, blue hue. The guide tells us that the denser the ice the more likely it is to be blue. 

After a 2 mile paddle, we are at the face of the glacier. It’s amazing to see it from the perspective of the water, but this one is less stable than Matanuska, so we can not get quite as close. We pull over onto a gravel beach, eat fig newtons, and drink hot chocolate before hiking up a small hill for an even more glorious view of the glacier. 

The paddle back goes quickly as the wind is at our backs. We eat a box lunch on the beach and then board the train back to Anchorage. 

After a long day on the lake and train, I enter my new room at the Extended Stay hotel and find Cal staring calmly out of the window. What a great travel partner and friend, I think. We stand side by side, as we both observe the sun that will not set. 

[lifewithoutmeds]

august 7, 2023

another pretty bad month.

there were a couple days i think, maybe before the camping trip in which i felt the mildest of lifts, probably when i sat down to write my last entry, but it’s been bad since.

quick recap of the last few weeks july 21-23: camping with rhiannon. she picked me up friday morning, we packed up her car, and head up to bishop. stopped at the grocery outlet for a ton of groceries, some beer, firewood, etc., got a sandwich at Schat’s, and browsed the bishop visitor center (and i picked up two new graphic t shirts.) it was very hot, like in the 90′s or 100′s, but was fortunately a bit cooler at our site (like maybe mid 80′s.) we set up and spent the next couple days chilling/fishing by rock creek lake (me fishing and rhiannon in her hammock), sitting around the fire, and mostly just feeling alternately hot and bug-bitten. i cried when we turned the bend to rock creek lake and i remembered very specific spots where i’d had conversations with jadai, when i looked at her expression, when i wanted her to see the lake, when i looked for the delight in her eyes. i cried when we went to the little store by rock creek lake resort, i remembered how we had looked at everything, been so enamored with everything and with each other. i wept.

wednesday, july 26: went to work. had our monthly lunch. i think it might have been miguel’s last day and i sat next to him and tried to talk and be pleasant to others. for dinner i met lorena at hong kong bbq and we had chow fun and fried pork and i brought home the fried pork and it wasn’t very good.

thursday, july 27: had a zoom psychiatrist appointment where i was crying, and she told me to start taking 10mg of lexapro again because of all the sadness and crying and wanting to die business. she also increased my lamotrigine to 150 mg but for some reason i couldn’t get it filled until like august 3 (delivered august 4) so i went for a week without and maybe coincidentally kinda lost my mind for the next two weeks. i also had izakaya dinner with tracy (who came by and i drove us to little tokyo.) we went to beard papa’s where she got a cream puff for her wife and we stopped at the little tokyo market where i got a couple cans of yerba mate, then we headed back.

friday, july 28: dinner with stephen and billy in ktown at a place called T Equals Fish. live octopus. live shrimp. ok seafood. some soju. i was feeling pretty down but tried not to show it.

saturday, july 29: facetime with kelda. don’t recall much but probably cried. then went to clay and amy’s for clay’s 40th birthday party. i mostly just chatted with jenny and had a few beers before heading home.

have no recollection of sunday. i think i had considered going to a local espiscopal church but then didn’t. i probably just laid in bed and stared at my phone.

tuesday, august 1: forced myself to leave the condo and go to the market to buy some charcuterie stuff then met up with my mom and drove to the LA zoo where we then shuttled to the hollywood bowl to watch her favorite pianist. we met up with some of her choir friends earlier and they gave us some homemade kimbap and fruit, and i tried not to look dead inside but was not very talkative or friendly, and i just kinda tried to wait everything out. like i didn’t really want to be there. i didn’t want to be out. i didn’t want to sit on a concrete bench. i didn’t want to have to gauge how much liquid i could drink because we were pretty squashed in between other people and going to the bathroom would be hard. i watched the pianist and was just ... i just felt so empty, just wondering how all these people could be so interested, so invested, get so much joy out of this, and i was just thinking of how uncomfortable i was, and how i couldn’t wait until this ended, and reminded myself to feel gratitude for every day and every night that i got to stay at home alone and not have to bother with anything. finally it was over and people clapped and clapped and he came back for an encore and played this etude by Chopin and i just started sobbing. it’s one of my favorite piano pieces and it had been the theme song for the first tv show that i enjoyed, a japanese tv show with a very beautiful woman and a very unattractive man that my mom had dumbed down for me by calling it “Beauty and the Beast” although it was something like, “1001 Dates” or something. and i just suddenly remembered all of my longing, and how that was probably one of my first crushes, and how drawn i was to the woman, and just how much longing i have in general for beautiful women. i just cried and cried with aching and longing. we then watched the other half which did Not feature the pianist then left with the mob and shuttled back and bid each other adieu.

wednesday, august 2: i had somehow agreed to meet up with kelly to go walking after work at the Los Angeles State Historic Park and was annoyed i had done so, considering all i wanted to do was get out of the heat and resume lying on my face, but we ended up meeting up and i got in more steps than i had in the weeks prior, and we caught up and chatted and it ended up being good.

friday, august 4: not sure how or when but somehow i had agreed to go on an open charter fishing boat with a County coworker i had never met in real life and was dreading it. dreading having to do something, dreading having to get ready for it, and having to sleep early and wake up early, for having to think ahead and for having to do anything other than feed myself, go to the bathroom, and lie on my face, but i did, and it was slightly better than the alternative of lying on my face for 12 hours. i suppose it was good to be out in the fresh air and feel the wind and sun on my face though i threw up my breakfast burrito. there were times when i looked out at the water and contemplated throwing myself overboard, but i stopped myself and just stared emptily for long periods.

saturday and sunday i must’ve taken a total of about 300 steps. just from the bed to the bathroom to the kitchen for 1-2 meals/day. and just endless amounts of 90-day fiance recaps on the youtube. just. nothing. just a waste. trash built up. dishes piled up. i knew the fish fillets would slowly go bad but i didn’t have the wherewithal to do anything about it. i had to get an oil change but couldn’t bring myself to go. i just did nothing. i considered going to long beach pride with my bumble bff friend but then decided against it and resumed doing nothing.

today’s monday august 7. i surprised myself. granted i’d been in bed all weekend, but i actually got up only 10 minutes after the alarm rang (lately i’d been staying in bed til just past 7.) i made my bed. i might’ve even washed my face and put on a bit of lotion. i was more present at work than i’d been for the past week. i managed to text my mom and let her know about the fish fillets and she said she’d come over and pick them up. i did some dishes. i took out some trash and recycling. when she came over, i cried and raged a little bit about everyone and everything being a stupid hamster on a stupid wheel and crying, but also thanked her for coming by. she washed some dishes and cleaned my floor. miraculously, i had the wherewithal to go to glendale lube after work and get my oil changed. i then even went to the local coin car wash and sprayed the bird poop that had been baking on my car for the last few weeks. then when i got home i somehow took a 30 minute walk, took a shower, and then sat down to journal. shocking.

what’s kind of weird is that i didn’t really feel like doing any of this. i kind of didn’t feel too markedly different than i did yesterday or the day before. the bed still appealed to me. my phone still appealed to me. the circumstances were largely the same. i don’t know whether maybe i was just sick of being in bed for so long or feeling guilty or whatever, but i still felt extreme reluctance to do many things but somehow i still did them. and that was very surprising. that i could. that i could just sort of mechanically go about and still do a lot of the life things. i could still answer emails and check on permit statuses and i could still write down my expenses for the month. was it muscle memory? was it a strong feeling of obligation/duty? it was bizarre. it was like playing with a Sim and just having it do certain tasks. i just set myself to do things and just did them until they were finished and time had passed and things were getting accomplished and it was bizarre that things could still happen even though i felt empty about the whole process. it was weird that i could do things or not do things. regardless, the day passed, but it was a matter of if the place smelled more or less fishy. i could cramp my hand by holding my phone for 12 hours at a time, or i could scrub my bathtub. it made no difference to life. but one hurt my hand and one made my bathtub less scummy.

must remember. must remember.

[actual-changeling]

*cracks knuckles* run

My personal headcanon is that Crowley can control whether or not he dreams the same way he can control his body's need for sleep in the first place since dreams are sleep in a way. Aka he can decide if his brain is going to experience REM sleep phases or not.

So maybe sometimes he allows himself the pleasure of a dream or two, and they always end up being about Aziraphale. Most of the time they're completely innocent: the vivid memory of an afternoon at the Ritz, the half hour Aziraphale was bathed in a golden sunset two weeks ago, how he smiled at him when Crowley handed him a hot cup of cocoa on a cold day.

Sometimes his brain is not satisfied with replaying reality, though, and that's when he gets dreams.

Lunch at the Ritz turns into him staring at Aziraphale's lips until he notices and lets out an extra loud moan with the next bite, which turns into a hand on his thigh, which turns into fingertips brushing over the junction between his thigh and hip, and—well, you can imagine how that one ends.

He wakes up from those not confused but oddly guilty, and his chest is heavy with six thousand years of repressed desire while his body is giving him extremely conflicting signals as to what it wants him to do about it.

Those dreams are pleasant and vivid, stars lighting up an otherwise dark night, and it does not matter how much shame he might feel, he treasures every single one of them.

That changes once Aziraphale is gone.

It changes because now his control over his dreams is slipping and he knows (fuck, he KNOWS) the soft shape of his lips like his own after only one angrily desperate kiss.

It changes because suddenly he no longer has dreams—he has nightmares.

Nightmares always begin as a dream, with lips all over his body and heat tingling underneath his skin, but with that memory comes the knowledge of deeply anchored loss.

Every single night, Crowley dreams of sunlight-warmed kisses and the taste of Aziraphale's smile. Every single night, Aziraphale's smile turns sharp and brittle, the kiss becomes salty and painful, and he leaves.

Over and over and over.

By dawn, Aziraphale has disappeared and the stars have faded with him, and no matter how hard he tries to turn his dreams off again, the nightmares remain. Crowley's body is betraying him, urging him back to bed with a need for sleep he cannot rid himself of either, and with exhaustion clinging to his every heartbeat, he makes an important realisation.

Desire, affection, and love are all nightmares in the end; they were never dreams because there is no such thing as a dream, let alone one that could come true.

Every dream is simply a nightmare that has yet to bare its teeth.

If you pay attention in your sleep, you can sense its hot breath in the back of your neck, and once you understand that the shadows have eyes, peace becomes the promise of pain.

So yes, Crowley sleeps, and he dreams—and desperately wishes he didn't.

-

okay op i promise this was supposed to be horny posting. it really was. however, i saw a promising road and i simply had to go check it out.

I wonder if Demons and Angels can dream

Because if they can Crowley has definitely had a few unexpected filthy dreams

Especially with Aziraphale around it’s basically inevitable

[yesitsmewhataboutit]

Would it be alright to ask for a simple Shouto x reader story where reader gets laryngitis and can't speak for a while?

My throat is killing me and I really wanted to request it to someone.

If you aren't taking requests that's fine, just thought I'd put it out in the ether.

»»——⍟——««A/n: Okokok I promise I know how to follow directions and I see you asked for a story. But I also kinda like this and it’d be really sweet as a fic but knowing me I’d wanna make it long and I’m not in the mood for long as you know so itd take me a while to do and I also really wanna get this for you quickly. So I knew if I put it in headcanon format then I’d be able to work it out real quick <3 hope this Is good enough

Masterlist

Shoto would be so gentle with you

You keep telling him yeah you’re in pain but it’s your throat so he doesn’t necessarily need to be so anxious

But of course that does nothing

He waits on you hand and foot as much as he can

He puts his hand out for you and tells you to tap it for responses

1 tap no, 2 yes, 3 you don’t care/it’s up to him

Every time he comes to you and puts out his hand you can’t help but smile cause it’s such a sweet gesture

The smile always melts his heart

He will give you as much cuddles as you desire

He’ll also ask if you want him to have one of his hands laid gently on your neck, if that’ll make it feel better

You of course can choose which one

He stays with you as many days as he can but when he does have to go back to the agency he dreads it

Usually he’d call you a few times through the day

But ya know… that doesn’t really work right now

So as an alternative he FaceTimes you

Just to see your pretty face and know you’re ok :)

He definitely stretches it out as long as he can

He leaves his phone propped up on his desk and has your company as he works

I mean… what you gonna do? Talk and distract him from work?

He will happily have you sitting on his desk for the remainder of the day after his lunch break

Knowing Todoroki though, he’d still manage to get distracted just watching you do whatever your doing

Even if you’re only laying there in bed, he’ll stare at you thinking about how beautiful you look

God forbid you fall asleep on the phone. The man will get nothing done but at the same time try to work quickly and get home before you wake so he can slip in bed with you

Eventually he just gives up on work and calls the overnight office workers in and has them finish

When he does get home, whether you’re asleep or not, its cuddle time

If you are asleep, he just lays there for a while, and if not, laying there with him eventually lulls you to sleep

Todoroki will slip away and make soup for you

Making sure it’s not too hot, but a nice pleasant warm for you’re throat

He’ll miss hearing your voice, but he’ll love taking care of you

Masterlist

[yanderechuu]

Shower Thoughts

yandere!Class 1A x fem!reader

[3.2K]

Summary: Momo wasn’t as trustable as you had presumed.

Warning: Larceny, nonconsensual touching, masturbation

│

You used to spend roughly ten minutes in the shower, only ever needing to soak your body in the water, apply shampoo and body wash before rinsing all the foam of products from your skin and scalp. Shower thoughts simply consisted of the day’s agenda or any special occurrence that had happened the past week, never really drifting off to existential questions and dark notions that would keep you from leaving the bathroom later than usual. You neither necessarily liked taking a shower nor did you dread it, as to you it was only ever a mandatory routine of the day which you handled with a neutral mind.

But now, ten minutes were already a slow thirty, and majority of the time you bothered not to move your arms to make work of your hair, or lather your skin with soap as you normally would do had it not been for the questions plaguing your mind like how your classmates would terrorize your time and space.

Right, your classmates - who would spend every hour of the day with you as if they didn’t have anything better to do. As if you were an important subject of matter next to hero training. You never appreciated it, because from the start, you did not want to have anything do to with them. They smothered and coddled you as if air wasn’t that important to you, disregarding the way you felt about personal space, how it was very significant to you. Rare were the moments of peace as a few of them were always by your side, ‘ensuring your safety’ as they would like to quote it. Why ensure your safety? You had not been a prominent figure in the sports festival, neither did you have a quirk that could be of great utility for the villains unlike Bakugou or Tokoyami. You weren’t a problem child, either. Their justification of following you around like you were some sort of high-maintenance prisoner made no sturdy sense to you.

“There’s this new package of green tea my mother had sent me this week! Would you like to try it, (y/n)?”

“Sure.”

But if you had to choose among your classmates one whom you would tolerate for the following years you’d be in U.A., that would be Yaoyorozu Momo. She was kind and considerate, often determining your feelings before you could voice it out (not that you really had the courage to, most of the time). She was organized and pristine and never had you met someone more befitting for the definition of ‘mom friend’ than her. She was perfect in nearly every way, and even though you’d have the occasional pang of jealousy at some times her perfectionism was displayed (gender envy, isn’t it, (y/n)?), she never seemed to bear mal intent, so you would let the emotions slide. You’d see the galaxy in her eyes if you would stare long enough. Her tea was best substitute for coffee, too.

You never considered her more than a very great friend, though, and to her, that was a problem.

As you sauntered your way over to your dorm with her, you shuffled your bag to take your room key buried in the side pockets. “I’ll go down in a while, but you better make sure you’re in the common room before me.”

You wouldn’t allow your classmates to take advantage of your lone self simply because Momo wasn’t there to fend them off.

“Mhm! Lemon green tea as usual, correct?”

“Yeah. Thanks again, YaoMomo.”

Your use of sotto voce tone on her nickname gave a pleasant shiver down her spine; her eyes almost rolled to the back of her head had she not restrained herself. Having been always kept to yourself, you never felt the need to adjust your volume for others to hear properly, so oftentimes your voice came out in a whisper - not that she minded, of course. You sounded more sensual that way.

“Are you going to take a while or will I have to brew tea right away?”

“Training was more strenuous than usual, and my muscles can’t seem to relax,” you explained, “so I’m going to take a quick shower.”

From your peripheral vision as you were focused on your bag to fish out the key, you saw Momo’s jaw slack upon hearing your plan to take a bath. It was odd, but you didn’t give particular attention to it when you finally took out your desired item. You failed to notice the way she abruptly settled her gaze on the key, inspecting it as if she was deliberating its shape, form, and material, and installing it to memory.

“Oh- oh!” She exclaimed. “I do remember having some body wash that help soothe muscle strains and body aches. I can hand them to you if you want.”

You shook your head, smiling lightly. “You’re too kind, YaoMomo. But I think just hot water will do for me.”

She watched as you opened the door to your room, giving her one more smile before disappearing inside and locking the door with a distinct click. As soon as you did so, she pulled the sleeve of her wrist up, developing with her body lipids a key the exact copy of the one you had held.

You certainly lied when you had said you were going to take a ‘quick’ shower. Already ten minutes into it did you only decide to sleek yourself with liquid body soap, initially absentmindedly rubbing it on your body, before you gradually got rougher with your movements and soon you found yourself scuffing your own flesh with vehement motion.

They were excessively touchy again, your classmates. Denki got too close to your face while delivering a pick-up line that made you wish you didn’t exist in order to hear it, and upon nearing you did Bakugou pull you away from him, cursing at him to buzz off. He took his time feeling up your waist - the part he used to grab you - while at it. During lunch, as you were once again coerced into joining his group to the cafeteria, Izuku refused to let go of your hand as you walked, and Uraraka as adamant with hugging you by the hips with one arm. It was what girlfriends did, she said, and you were not entirely sure whether or not she referred to that word romantically.

And if not, then did girlfriends also normally touch the parts of which you did not want to be touched on? You felt, clear as day, a bare hand resting on your thigh when you sat on your usual spot, dangerously close to lifting your skirt for everyone to see, and when you gave Hagakure’s faceless face a questioning look, she asked you what was wrong. Her uniform sleeve was literally floating on top of your lap, and still she had the gall to pretend as if she was not touching you with lacking consent. 

 You were not safe from Shoto, either, when he offered to readjust your uniform tie and you were in no place to decline (you had the right to, but they just stripped you off of it), his breath hitching in ecstasy as his fingers brushed your chest; he was, audaciously enough, not hiding his bliss. Then he rubbed your shoulders to ‘warm you up,’ when all he really intended to do was motivate his own fantasy that you were his and he was simply scenting you like some fucking alpha to his omega.

You turned no blind eye to their gesticulations. You never once found it endearing, and wished they would stop with whatever the hell this was called, because you were quite sure this was past the border of molestation and could already be rendered a form of bullying.

But not once did you consider the possibility of having a class obsessed with your quaint self.

So you supposed that until you’d find a way to deduce their idiosyncratic actions and tendencies then you would have to make do with your own bathroom as your safe space. Momo was the only classmate you could confide to, so at least she was there.

Unfortunately, you had yet to see the other side of her coin.

Because as she was just right outside your bathroom door, obsessively taking in every bit of item you owned inside your dorm room like a madman, you were left with the impression that she was all you could ever ask for in a friend. You didn’t know how she was not any better than the rest of your classmates, adoring your very existence to the extent of insanity; how she’d crave for you so often and so terribly that she’d feel herself clench when you do so much as merely spare her a glance. And you had done that a lot today - she would have to relieve herself for it.

She spotted the heap of clothes right by your bed; it became apparent that you had stripped yourself off of it before entering the bathroom and taking a shower. Walking towards it, a portion of your seamless underwear came to view, and she resisted the urge to render into a mound of horniness in order to pick it up and inspect it closely.

It was a lighter color of (s/c). A plain, simple, modest undergarment item, still it evoked a particular feeling on the bottom center of Momo’s hips. The heat came rushing along her midriff and instigated the muscle of her legs to falter, and as soon as she felt it, a hand of hers drifted past her skirt, feeling up the slick accumulated on the fabric of her own panties only with the knowledge that your panties were currently in her possession. She needed release, but you were nearly finished with your bath, and she was still inside your room.

You walked out of the shower the moment she shut the door of your bedroom. You saw it closed, but you didn’t catch the culprit.

This unnerved you to no end. Undoubtedly, you thought, this had to be one of your classmates. Who else was it supposed to be? Aizawa-sensei (...)? You had yet to know their ultimatum, but you were sure this occurrence was another one of their schemes. You had assumed that all their weird, unappreciated antics were just to get you to socialize with them, but now you didn’t understand why it had gotten to the point of entering your room without permission.

You couldn’t keep this to yourself.

So you planned to bring it up to Momo, a representative of your class and someone whom you deemed trustable enough to share it with. Quickly, you dressed into your casual indoor attire, and rushed outside your room to head to the kitchen, where you presumed she’d be in the process of making your tea. But she wasn’t there.

Instead, she was in her own room, your panties muzzled right into her face and her own fingers buried deeply inside her cunt.

“Oh- oh, god- Ah! (Y/n)!”

Oh god, your panties. Oh god, your panties. The object most intimate to your parts of intimacy, soaking every bit of womanly secretion from your genitalia. Of all the masturbation sessions she had done to the thought of you, this was the hottest. She wasn’t quite sure whether to imagine your cunt on her lips in a position of mutual cunnilingus or your fingers thrusting into her in place of hers. She wanted both.

A whine slipped past her lips. To think that moments ago, she was in the same space as you were nude. Oh, to join you in the bathroom, doing inenarrable things to each other with the use of the showerhead. To touch your skin selfishly rather than only watch as she would do during class hours.

She came with a squeal, falling face-down to bite the duvet of her large bed. Gone in her hazy mind was her promise to you of lemon green tea, and as she still basked in the pathological euphoria of getting off, you were in the common room, anxiously waiting for her return.

But just as you had expected, someone was bound to spot you alone and take this as an opportunity to be with you, and they just so happened to be-

Oh. Aoyama.

He offered you a slice of cheese with his usual grin before settling down a few feet beside you, enough to leave you be in your personal bubble. You gave him occasional glances, unwrapping the cheese from its casing and he just sat there, eating his. He was alright, you guessed - another tolerable classmate of yours next to Momo. Perhaps it was because you used to always be alone in the classroom with him during break time that you were at ease with his presence. Or maybe he just seemed so gay and that, for some reason, comforted you. One gay presence could comfort another lol.

“It’s delicious.” Your comment came out inadvertently.

“Oui. Only the best quality for the best person.” He flaunted.

You weren’t exactly sure whether he was referring to you or to himself, but you paid little attention to that as the cheese was certainly delicious; you were not lying.

“It’s odd how your chose to take a bath at this time of the day.” He spoke.

You stopped chewing.

He meant to refer to your damp hair, but having just suspected your class of breaking and entering your room, you thought otherwise.

“I-” You choked on the cheese, ending up needing to gulp it like liquid content instead of breaking it down to fit your throat. 

Immediately, he sprang up in concern, stepping over to you to gently thump you on the back. “Are you alright?”

“No- I mean- I just-!” You wheezed, occasionally having to clear your throat. You swatted his hand away from you; you hadn’t meant to appear rude, but you did. You stood up in a rush. “L-look, I have to go.”

“Don’t you want to drink water?”

“I’m- fine,”

With your words, you took off from the common room area and headed back to your room. There were two sets of emotions that mixed to form the bile in your throat. One was wrath and humiliation upon the discovery of Aoyama’s actions. The other was betrayal and confusion from Momo’s absence when she had said she’d be brewing tea for you, and it wasn’t the tea that disheartened you. She knew of your issue with the class, and if she were busy, couldn’t she have texted you a heads-up?

She shouldn’t be surprised when at the next time she saw you, you interacted with her less. Your intention to distance yourself from her was most prominent, and it didn’t help that your classmates took notice of this, because now they were taking advantage of the situation, tagging you along with them in spite of your futile attempts to decline now that Momo was nowhere to tell them off. When she’d talk to you, you would answer, though your voice was back to speaking to her like she was a stranger. 

Resentment was stronger than ruing the lack of intimacy between you two. It was as if she had received your panties in exchange for the time she’d be spending with you, oddly enough. After much deliberation, she came to realize that this was your little ‘tantrum’ after not being able to meet with her the other day. 

It was pretty cute, she thought, that you’d try and make her acknowledge the fault on her part by ignoring her.

You didn’t walk with her back to dorms as per usual that dismissal. Instead, just like what you had used to do before finding consolation in her, you walked alone, accomplishing being able to avoid your classmates as you did. By the time she reached the dorms, you were in the kitchen, fetching a glass of water to satiate your throat. She took a hold of your wrist before you went back to your room.

“(Y/n),” she pleaded, “tell me what’s wrong.”

You looked at her with a reluctant expression. Perhaps you should. After the short while that you had been hanging out with her, her presence turned into something you came to miss. You wanted her back, but not in the way she wanted you.

“I-it’s just,” you stammered out, “y-you know how I feel being alone in the common room without you. I... I’m not comfortable with our classmates when you’re not around.” She took pride in this. “I don’t take it lightly how you left me alone the other day...”

Your voice faltered out the longer you spoke.

So she was correct; you were certainly having your little ‘tantrum.’ With a guilty smile, she left your wrist to hold your hand tenderly, and suddenly it dawned upon you the feeling of whenever Bakugou held your waist, Shoto nuzzled his face on your neck or Izuku invaded your personal space.

Fear and apprehension.

Before you could preach your objection to whatever she had planned ahead for you, she dragged you along with her and you both reached her dorm room before you could comprehend where she was taking you. 

“I’ll make it up to you.” She said, making you sit on her large bed.

Then she proceeded to make you tea, boiling water with an electric kettle situated on top of her study desk; there also laid a tea set next to her three books, which you assumed were those of which would aid her in the utility of her quirk, like encyclopedias. Beside those was a piece of cloth, unfolded, unkept - a (s/c)-colored silk fabric.

Your face drained of color.

She pushed the books towards the cloth, completely obscuring it from your view and leaving the table disorganized. You knew Momo, neat and orderly as much as possible; she wouldn’t do that without reason.

Now that you thought about it, the same day someone had barged in your room, your underwear had been missing from your set of laundry garments. You spent the next whole day actively avoiding Aoyama, thinking he was the culprit to this felony. At the present moment you were reconsidering your allegation.

“U-um, Momo, I need to go-”

“Here!”

She yelled it so giddily, so uncharacteristically, as she pushed the cup of tea towards your way. How she did so was very quick that you had not the time to take it properly, and steaming liquid fell to your décolletage, past the cotton of your uniform and streaming down the valley of your breasts. It was a moist mess. She loved every bit of it.

“Oh! Oh, my bad. I’ll- I’ll clean you up!” She exclaimed, all flushed and excited.

You didn’t find it in you to push her back when she began to do exactly what she had said, taking your blazer off, loosening your school tie and unbuttoning the dress shirt underneath, only ever being able to stare at her with eyes that evinced betrayal, because it slowly occurred to you that she was satiating her own selfish obsession with you all under the ruse of maintaining a decent friendship. 

“(Y/n),” She breathed out, “I adore you.”

She was no different than the rest of your classmates, and you were a fool to think otherwise.

[justauthoring]

Amongst Them All, I See You

Prompt: Hey! I saw that you’re taking requests, and wanted to toss one out there for you. Hope you don’t mind. by the way, i absolutely LOVE your writing!! it’s always so heartwarming and nicely worded. Anyways, I had this idea for a Tsukishima Kei x reader where maybe basically Him and the reader have a enemies-to-lovers relationship. and maybe it has something to do with yamaguchi? i was thinking it could be some kind of angst 👉👈 but if you don’t write angst that’s perfectly fine!! it doesnt have to be. feel free to twist this any way you want :) Requested by: anonymous (thank you darling!).

A/N: salty beanpole has finally made his arrival ;) Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x F!Reader

From the moment he met you, Tsukishima didn’t like you.

Now, he couldn’t exactly explain why. There wasn’t necessarily a real reason for it, just a feeling, an instinct if you will, and Tsukishima felt it best to listen to his gut. It’d never failed him before.

“Tsukki! I brought Y/N!”

By now, this is a common occurrence. Yamaguchi was all but determined to make the two of you friends, though Tsukishima couldn’t even begin to understand why, and it didn’t matter who ended up getting dragged along, the two of you found yourself constantly forced to spend time together.

Today, apparently, is no different. And the apprehensive, hesitant expression on your face is the same as always as Yamaguchi holds tightly to your wrist, you two steps behind him as you’ve probably spent the last few minutes trying to desperately convince your friend that it was alright, you didn’t mind eating lunch alone, you didn’t need company, etc. that Yamaguchi basically never listens to.

After all, you are a lot easier to convince then Tsukishima is.

You can never really say no to Yamaguchi’s soft eyes and hopeful smile, it seems.

Yamaguchi forces you to sit, before taking the spot next to you with a pleasant smile, reaching into his bag as if he hadn’t all but forced you against your will there.

And Tsukishima stares for a moment, one, two, before placing the lid back on his bento box. “I’ll be taking my leave then,” he says simply, voice dull, face blank as he moves to stand.

As Yamaguchi rushes to stop him, a hand over his own, practically pleading and spouting something like we’ve never not eaten lunch together -- something Tsukishima could really care less about, he misses the second of hurt that flashes in your eyes. It’s brief, passing with a blink, and then your face is settling into a scowl, cutting Yamaguchi’s begging off;

“Am I really all that awful to be with?”

“No--”

“Yes--”

Yamaguchi glares at him, to which Tsukishima rolls his eyes, finally sitting back down in his seat with a sigh.

And so, lunch continues on as it usually does. Tsukishima sits there silently, maybe putting a word in or two if Yamaguchi looks at him expectantly, while the two of you talk adamantly amongst one another. You’re loud, painfully so, like you always are, and Tsukishima is all but torturously reminded of Hinata, and he can already feel a headache coming.

He doesn’t listen to the conversation, not really at least. He does take note, mainly because he can’t help to, like he always does, that while you always seem to be loud at lunch, or after practice, it’s only ever when you’re with Yamaguchi. In class, you’re quiet. Almost eerily so. And you’re usually alone. 

Scratch that, before Yamaguchi and him, you were always alone.

Tsukishima pretends like he hadn’t noticed, like when Yamaguchi comes bounding up to him one day, excited to introduce you, he didn’t already know who you were. Because, it seemed like lots didn’t. Your presence is often lost amongst the crowd, and for the longest time, Tsukishima felt like he was the only one who did see you.

Head turned down, arms wrapped around yourself, you so purposely tried to avoid attention but Tsukishima always noticed you.

He doesn’t tell people things very often, and even Yamaguchi doesn’t know the things he swears he’ll never tell anyone. So, for the longest time, you’re like this secret he keeps. He notices you, you don’t notice him, and he sees things that no one else does.

He sees the frustration on your face when you open your locker only to find that your books and homework have been ripped. He sees the way you rush from class to class, desperate to be in the halls for as little time as possible. He sees the way that one girl from class, Tsukishima doesn’t care to learn her name, slams you up against your locker one day after school, and hears the low threats thrown your way, ones he can’t make sense of.

And he sees the way you always wear your blazer, even when it’s blazing hot outside. You choose the longer skirt option, and are always wearing knee high socks. Your skin is constantly covered, hiding something.

But then Yamaguchi introduces you to him one day, like he didn’t already know who are you, and you’re all shy smiles and quiet whispers to him but you’re bright eyed and giggly when you turn to Yamaguchi. You speak to him like he’s a friend you’ve had for years, rather then a few weeks, and Tsukishima jealousy bubbles up to hate towards you for some sick, twisted reason he can’t properly explain.

And it’s just been like that for the past two months.

“We don’t have practice after school,” Yamaguchi offers, eyeing Tsukishima before turning to you. “Would you like to hang after school?”

Tsukishima notices, out of the corner of his eye, the way your body straightens at his words, eyes widening slightly in panic. Panic that’s only there for a moment, something that Yamaguchi completely misses.

“Uh, sure. I just have to, um, uh, drop something off quickly after class. I can meet you outside, by the gym?”

Yamaguchi shrugs, “sure.”

And Tsukishima wonders how Yamaguchi didn’t notice how plainly obvious a lie that was.

“Anyways, um,” you move to gather your stuff, quickly, movements stiff. “I have to talk to the teacher before class, so I’ll just meet you guys there, okay?” And you’re standing before Yamaguchi can really say otherwise, waving at him, before your eyes fall on his, as if debating, before turning, rushing off.

Yamaguchi turns back to his food, completely obvious.

“I’ll be late after school too.”

“Oh?” Yamaguchi mumbles, obviously confused. “Is everything okay?”

“Fine,” Tsukishima nods, “just got to grab something.”

-

“Ah, here you go, Y/N-chan! I’ll need them done by tomorrow!”

Your jaw all but falls to the floor.

“T-Tomorrow?” You whisper, hesitant, voice shaky. “But... this is like three days worth of homework, Suzuki-san, I couldn’t possibly--”

“But you will,” she cuts in sharply, your own eyes falling on her with a blink of surprise, wincing slightly at the deep frown on her lips. “Because you know what will happen if you don’t.”

Fingers tightening around the stack of papers, you sigh, trying to stop the shaking of your limbs as you numbly nod. “Of course, Suzuki-san,” you whisper, “I’ll have them done by tomorrow morning.”

Her hand raises in your peripheral and you flinch, expecting the worst, lips parting to apologize for whatever you did wrong -- but her hand simply falls on top of your head in a mock pat. “Perfect.” And then she’s turning without another word, not even a thanks, and as you watch her walk off, you feel your vision blur.

Your grip on the paper tightens, turning painful as you curse softly to yourself, turning around so your backs against the hall and you hastily rip open your locker to hide yourself the best you can. Luckily, everyone’s most gone off now, so there’s no prying eyes watching you cry to yourself.

Not like anyone ever notices anyway...

“You shouldn’t let her talk to you like that.”

Jumping at the voice, the eerily familiar one, you spin, wiping at your eyes desperately as you peer up at Tsukishima, shocked. “Tsukishima!” You gasp, shaking your head. “You scared me,” you try to laugh off, pressing a hand against your chest and pretend like you hadn’t just been sobbing to yourself seconds prior. “Did Yamaguchi send you to find me? I’m surprised you agreed, but i’m almost--!”

His hand slams against the locker next to yours, causing you to jump once more, blinking up at him as he glares down at you.

“Cut the bullshit.”

Laughing nervously, you shake your head; “I-I don’t know--”

“I saw everything Y/N,” he cuts in, “don’t lie to me.”

And sudden anger flares in you, frustration from before, and frustrated at him, at people constantly interrupting you, walking all over you like you were nothing but dirt. “What do you care,” you hiss, voice low as you turn, ignoring him as you grab the paper, slamming your locker shut. “You hate me.”

And there’s a pause, Tsukishima blinking in surprise that you don’t notice, before the papers ripped from your hands. You spin back around, ready to yell at him, before you notice him moving towards the trash and all but dumping the pile in.

“W-Wait!” 

You try to stop him, to no avail, and your eyes widen as you lean over the rim of the garbage can, eyeing the papers that have spread amongst the trash, rotted food and spilled drinks, soiling the paper.

Eyes wide, disbelief flooding your entire system, you turn to Tsukishima. “Why would you do that?” You whisper, shaking your head. “You don’t understand, she’ll--!”

“She’ll what?” He asks bluntly, gaze never wavering.

Swallowing thickly, you shake your head; “it doesn’t matter. Just-Just help me get the paper, most of it might still be okay--”

Tsukishima grabs you by the wrist, halting you from grabbing the papers.

You spin, blinded by your anger, and shove at him in the chest. But Tsukishima barely budges, just staring down at you as you glare at him, the tears now falling once more as you feel your emotions that you’ve been hiding and building up inside of you, finally come pouring out.

“What do you even know!” You yell, voice booming. “Why do you even care? Don’t you hate me? You only tell me how annoying I am every day, constantly, and now she’ll... Suzuki-san...--”

“Y/N,” grabbing both your wrists, Tsukishima pulls gently, pulling your eyes on him. You find yourself surprised at what you see when you meet his gaze, baffled by the softened look in his gaze -- and... is that? Guilt? “Just look at me.”

You fall silent, puzzled.

“You don’t have to worry about her,” he says simply, “she won’t hurt you anymore.”

Anymore?

How does he...?

Lips parting, you try to find the words, bewildered, at a loss of words.

“Y/N--”

Pushing at his chest, you stumble away from him, shaking your head. Eyes blurred, watering, you glare up at him, while he simply stares back down at you, that same stupid guilty look on his face.

“Tsukki? Y/N...?”

Blinking, you both glance back, Yamaguchi having come to a stop before the two of you, clearly confused.

That seems to snap you out of your stupor. Wiping at your eyes, you turn, “I have to go home,” you whisper, voice quiet. “Sorry Tadashi, but I won’t be able to hang tonight.”

And then you’re taking off into a sprint, desperate to get as far away as possible.

“Tsukki?” Yamaguchi whispers after a moment, turning to look at his friend imploringly. “What happened--?”

Scoffing, Tsukishima just shakes his head. “Nothing.”

-

“Take your hands off of her.”

Blinking, you shift, enough to glance at the shadow that has fallen over both you and Suzuki, bewildered at the sight of Tsukishima.

But he simply ignores you, keeping his gaze trained on Suzuki who seems just as confused as you, though more angry. It doesn’t phase him however, and he simply stands there, one hand in his pocket, the other clutching his school bag tightly, as the glare on his glasses stares her down.

“Now.”

Suzuki lets go of you, and you crumble to the ground in a heap, turning to Tsukishima with a scoff. “Who are you to tell me what to do?” She laughs, shaking her head with a roll of her eyes. “Besides, this is the girls washroom, you’re not--”

He catches the hand that she waves lazily at him, and it doesn’t take a genius to know his grip is tight. She gasps in response, her face falling in pain as he glowers down at her. “I’d say bullying is worse,” he mumbles, and somehow the drawl, the uninterest in his tone of voice is even more terrifying then him being actually angry. “And I’d wonder how your teacher would feel if she knew all your perfect grades were because of Y/N?”

Suzuki’s eyes widen, clearly scared, before scoffing. “And what proof do you--”

“It’s mine and Y/N’s word against your own, Suzuki.”

She turns to you then, and so does Tsukishima, and your lips part, unsure.

“Like Y/N will say--”

“I’m done with warning you,” she whimpers slightly, and your eyes fall to the grip he stills hold of her, a hand going to your lips. “Either leave and never bother Y/N again, or you will regret it.”

He lets go of her, and there’s a pause in which Suzuki sends one last look at you, before rushing out of the bathroom without another word.

“Here.” Tsukishima’s grabbing ahold of you before you even notice, gently pulling you to your feet, and helping set you against one of the sinks before he turns, locking the bathroom door.

“Thank you,” you whisper when he turns back to you, hugging yourself.

“I told you,” he shrugs, “she won’t hurt you anymore.”

Looking down at your feet, you bite your lip. “How’d you know?”

He blinks, turning to you; “yesterday--”

“No,” you shake your head, turning to him sharply, “before that. How’d you know? No... No one ever notices. No one ever sees. Not even Tadashi.”

And Tsukishima tenses at the mention of him, the way you regard him on a first name basis when you said it right there and then -- he’d never noticed. No one did. But him.

“I noticed,” he whispers, “and I should’ve done something about it earlier.”

“It wasn’t your problem,” you shrug, before letting out a short laugh, “besides, you hate me, right? So it makes sense--”

He’s before you in seconds, shocking you to silence as he stands close, desperately close, but avoids your gaze, head tucked in, shaking his head. “I don’t...” And the words seem hard, forcing them forward, and Tsukishima suddenly seems less scary then and just... awkward.

Like he doesn’t know how to express what he’s feeling.

“I don’t... hate you.”

And you pause, letting the word sink in, before letting out a giggle, one that has Tsukishima glancing up at you in bafflement.

“Well, I’m glad,” you smile at him, the first time you’ve ever smile at him so... genuinely. “Because I don’t hate you either.”

[superhero--imagines]

Etsy Store Here l Ko-Fi l Commission Info

Part 2 Here!/ Part 3 Here! / Playlist Here!

* Sorry guys but this mans been living in my head rent free

* So the first time you see Satoru it’s with those black specs he likes to wear and you get a glance at those GORGEOUS eyes

* He meets your eyes for a second before looking away, it’s the briefest of interactions

* But your heart is racing and you can feel the familiar heat of attraction starting to lap at your face

* ‘He looks just like a prince’ you think

* You find out pretty fast the ‘prince’ similarities stop at appearance

* “Ah it’s not my fault you’re so weak~” You hear him say with the princely smile as he teases Utahime

* It looks like he’s held something so high she can’t reach it

* “Try your best, if you drink plenty of milk I’m sure you’ll be tall enough one day~” he says before laughing with that same princely face

* “You shouldn’t pick on those that are weaker than you” Geto intervenes, somehow making the entire situation worse

* You watch as Gojo laughs

* You’re starting to think he might be the real curse you need to exorcise

* You continue watching him as Utahime tries to kick him in the crotch

* “You silly girl, did you forget there’s an infinity between us?” Cue Gojo’s “A-hahahahaha” laugh

* Yeah, he’s definitely a demon

* You keep your distance, Gojo’s beautiful and all, but you’re not dumb, you’ve heard about the Satoru clan.

* “Hey Geto-Kun, who do you think would win in a fight me or a lion?”

* Besides that guy is way too reckless, you’d rather not get all mixed up in that if you can help it

* You watch as Satoru takes his shirt off, his well defined chest glistening

* Still, you’re grateful for the show

* Little do you know the famous Gojo Satoru has taken note of you as well

* Naturally given his ability he notices everyone, but he especially takes note of you

* It’s not because you stand out, quite the opposite

* You blend into the background easily, supporting others when needed

* But not to the degree where you unable to defend yourself, or you’re sacrificing your own life for someone else

* He grins

* Looks like he found something interesting

* You’re at the vending machine eyes racking over the drink selection

* But there’s another thirst quenching sight right next to you, their hand resting on the vending machine, that princely smile aimed right at you-

* “So what do you say?” Satoru asks, and you start to wonder if that princely smile seems just a bit wolfish “Do you want to be my lover?”

* You’re kind of annoyed

* What an impetuous question, you can count on one hand how many times you’ve spoken to each other, and you only need both hands to count the words said in each of those encounters

* “No”

* You turn your attention back to your drink choices, it’s pleasant weather so you don’t want anything hot.

* Anything carbonated is out of the-

* Gojo moves closer, peering into your face with that grin

* Ugh does he have to stand so close

* “Why ‘no’? I know you think I’m attractive”

* “I also think you’re a womanizer with a god complex”

* And really why shouldn’t he be?

* He’s probably the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen in your life, not to add the sheer power he contains in that body of his

* But just as he has the right to be a womanizer with a god complex, you have the right not to take part in that narrative

* He backs away, leaning back against the wall

* So he’s not going to deny it

* Well, at least he’s somewhat self aware

* Those clear blue eyes catch yours again, and you have to fight against every human instinct from showing any human reaction

* You turn back to the vending machine making your selection when a smile lilts onto his mouth

* “Friends then”

* “Just colleagues” you reply, grabbing your drink

* But as you walk by you push a canned beverage into his chest.

* It’s a can of green tea

* It’s his favorite drink

* He looks to you seeing a bottle glinting in your hand

* So you didn’t sacrifice your own thirst, but you also didn’t ignore his needs

* He feels that same wolffish grin curl onto his mouth

* “What an entertaining person”

* After that if you’re anywhere within a 50 feet radius of him he’ll go out of his way to get your attention

* “Oh wow, looking especially radiant this morning (Y/N/N)” he’ll say with a playful seductive wink

* When you don’t respond he tries annoying you instead

* “Ah you can’t reach that? Here let me-” and then he’ll proceed to hold it even further out of your reach

* He’s expecting you to jump up and down, or at least give some sort of response but you just walk away

* Well that wasn’t what he expected

* He feels that grin spread across his face again

* Very interesting

* His attraction to you is pretty shallow

* He’s interested you because you’re entertaining

* And you’re entertaining because you aren’t interested

* Which only makes him that much more interested in you

* Its a paradox

* You watch him flounder around, annoying Utahime for a giggle

* Well it doesn’t matter anyway, you know how he is, he’ll get bored soon enough and lose all interest in you

* He’s not the strongest {f*ckboy} for nothing

* You see him turn to meet your gaze, offering a boyish smile and a wink

* You make sure not to give any reaction, turning to listen to something Shoko is telling you

* You hope he can’t sense the twinge of heat you feel on your face

* You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find the attention a little flattering

* I think for the most part you’re right, Satoru is mostly playing around-

* At least at first.

* You’re just something new and fun no one knows about, and wildly entertaining since you never respond the way he thinks you will

* You’re kind, but not at the expense of yourself, and he likes that

* Besides you’ve got this quite sort of consideration for others-

* It’s not flashy, it’s so subtle most people hardly notice

* It’s in the way you bring an extra snack for Utahime when she’s running herself ragged training

* “They were having a two for one special”

* Or the way you’ll get your teacher a plushie you saw at a shop at the station because you know he needs more

* “I just thought it was cute, but I haven’t got any room for another one”

* You’re quiet, someone who hears things and she’s things, but never says anything about them

* A wallflower

* But you’re not weak

* There’s something about those two things put together in the same person that entertains him to no end. Like a paradox or a puzzle he can’t seem to solve no matter how hard he tries

* Satoru’s had at least a hundred lovers, and a great many of them had provided him with their own brand of kindness and consideration

* But he’s never felt something as warm as when he see’s a lunch box in his dorm after he hobbles back from a mission that lasted a little longer than expected

* He peers at the note attached, it’s not even signed but he knows it’s from you

* “I know you think you’re god or whatever, but even gods have to eat”

* He doesn’t know why, but he’s overcome with the urge to cry

* He gulps hard- it’s not like this a lunch you made by hand or anything, it’s just something from the convenience store

* And it’s not like this note is particularly affectionate or special either, he’s gotten entire love letters from his previous lovers

* So he’s not sure why he saves your note, placing it behind a picture frame where only he’ll know it is , or why he thinks that convenience store lunchbox is the most delicious thing he’s ever had

* Even though he knows he cares about you, and that he’s grown quite fond of you -

* I don’t think it clicks for him

* And part of that is because well, he’s Gojo Satoru

* He collects lovers like some people collect photographs or memories

* They serve their purpose, and he lets himself be entertained by pretending all the feelings are real, and then he moves on to the next one

* It’s just what he’s used to

* And this whole paradox you two have going on could go on for a few years until something finally shifts

* He went a little too far with one his half-flirting-half-tormenting pranks

* And for the first time you give him a reaction, it’s only for a second, but annoyance and anger mar you face

* And then just like that, it’s gone and you turn and walk off in the other direction

* Sh*t.

* He went too far didn’t he?

* It should be fine right? You’re not too mad at him right? You’ll get over it-

* Right?

* But for the next few days you don’t speak to him, and you don’t make eye contact

* It bothers him more than it should

* Normally he would be annoyed that his toy would have the gall to blatantly ignore him like this-

* But this is different than that.

* He’s-

* He’s feeling regret

* He shouldn’t have acted that way to you, maybe if he had just done something differently, or said something differently-

* It’s not like the way things were between you two was ideal or anything,

* But at least then you would at least speak to him

* ... and every once in while he would get to see you smile

* It’s never at him, it’s mostly when you’re with Shoko or Utahime

* Occasionally when you’re with Nanami or Geto, who you’ve been talking to more recently

* He’s pretty sure you three are talking about him, just one day away from forming a “down with Gojo Satoru” club

* Still that smile when you laugh-

* The way you look so carefree and young and so full of life is worth all the slander in the world to him

* He needs to see that smile, to know something that wholesome and kind exists somewhere in this cruel world

* Satoru’s thinking about how to go about apologizing to you

* He’s caught between buying you a Lamborghini or buying you a special grade tool when he ends up running into you

* “Ah, could you help me with something?”

* He would quite literally give you the clothes on his back right now if you asked

* You stand up on a a chair holding a glass of water

* “Apparently this is supposed to help with concentration or something” You say pressing the glass full of water to the ceiling

* “Can you hold this broom?” You ask and Satoru nods, holding the broom handle steady as you make sure it’s pushed against the glass holding it steady

* You nod approvingly down at him

* The rest happens pretty fast, you’re off the chair, carrying it away

* “The broom is actually a special grade tool, so cursed energy won’t work on it”

* You grin

* “Have fun figuring how to get out of that Baka Prince!” You say with a laugh

* And Satoru is dumbfounded

* But not because you just pranked him into a holding up a glass of water with a broom

* But because as you were rushing away, you showed him your teasing grin

* It’s the first time you smiled at him

* And as he looks up at the glass of water, a smile slowly spreads across his face

* It’s not the wolffish smile he usually has when he’s around you, or the princely smile he uses when he’s trying to get something

* It’s a genuine smile

* Ah, so that’s it

* He’s fallen in love with you

* If you’re not the one entertaining him, then he’s just not interested

* Ah geez

* He was so focused on trying to get you to fall in love with him that he really didn’t see this coming

* Well he’ll have to start being serious about pursuing you now-

* Though for you to pull off something like this on him tells him you’re his ideal match without a doubt

* A wallflower with a mischievous streak, he likes that.

* He scratches his head with his free hand

* “I wonder how I’m supposed to get out of this?” He muses looking up at the glass full of water

[obeiii-mee]

Could I request the brothers (and maybe Diavolo, if you're comfortable) reacting to a knightly/chivalrous m/c, please?

———————————————————

I haven’t written Diavolo in a hot minute, I’m glad he’s being requested again. I’m guessing you mean an MC with the attributes of a knight? The same sort of mannerisms and traits and not an actual knight! MC? Lemme know if I did this ask wrong because I was low key confused lmao.

———————————————————

The Brothers + Diavolo with a knightly/chivalrous MC:

Lucifer:

-He really didn’t like you upon first meeting

-He hated how he couldn’t intimidate you into not being a nuisance the way he could with most of his brothers

-But, to be honest, you had gained his respect rather early on

-I think, even though it may have annoyed him to no end, Lucifer was very fond of your bravery a lot of the times

-The way you would stand up for Mammon or that time you protected Beel and Luke from his outburst

-Courage is not a trait one would usually associate with humans, especially when more superior beings like demons are involved

-Your humility was also a characteristic of yours that he, surprisingly, was really fond of

-And your overall mercifulness was something to be congratulated as well

-I mean, him and his brothers put you through so much shit and for you to forgive and move on without an angry word at any of them kinda speaks on its own

-I think he understands, to an extent, the reason you’re so loyal to the people you care about too

-He has a certain devotion for Lord Diavolo and his brothers, more than he lets on

-To him, having someone like you around is something to be appreciated

-Because you are similar but also completely different and nothing like he deemed you to be at the beginning

-yo i think you remind him of himself back when he was angel tbh

-He’s sort of tired of saving your ass tho because you are very just, so you feel the need to help people all the time which leads to you getting involved in fights

-Bring him his 20th cup of coffee for the day please, it’s hard being a single father of 8 children (yes I’ve added Lord Diavolo he counts as one of the kids)

-He’s the definition of this incorrect quote I stumbled across a while back

- MC: “FIGHT ME RIGHT NOW!”

-Lucifer, from behind them “ Do not.”

Mammon:

-Ok so this random human comes to DevilDom and has the audacity to slap his hand away while he’s trying to steal from Diavolo’s castle????????

-“MC ya’re forgetting I’m a demon, my moral scale is wayyy different than yours-“

-“Put it back.”

-“......ok.”

-You’re coming at him with rightfulness and honor and your presence is gonna hit him like a truck

-Cuz he ain’t stealing anything when you’re around (lucifer uses this to his advantage ofc.)

-That was basically the only thing he disliked about you

-Other than that, after your first week in DevilDom, he thinks you’re a goddamn S A I N T

-Everytime you stand up for him when his brothers are being assholes-pls he melts into a puddle of goo from your perfection

-OOFFS AND ALL THOSE TIMES YOU GAVE HIM GIFTS BECAUSE GENEROSITY BBY

-Good thing he was wearing sunglasses, because holy fuck was he weeping under those Gucci shades

-He’s gonna give ya props for having the courage to stand up to him and his brothers

-Lucifer especially because big bro scary

-Think about it like this: literally every single one of them could have you seasoned and roasted for lunch, love

-And yet you still have the bravery to look them in the eye and tell them: “Ya’ll are dysfunctional as fuck and need family therapy.”

-Again, he doesn’t understand your morale, he’s the Avatar of Greed, if he sees something he likes or seems worthy of his presence, he takes it

-But with that look you’re giving him, he honestly feels so guilty he can’t help but put it back

-He also appreciates your patience with him when it comes to anything that involves him talking about his emotions and thought process

-Because at this point he is widely known as scum so-

-Ahhhh, in the end, he thinks you’re pretty badass for a human and would low key want to see you in an armour of sorts agajwhisebhwjwwhehgdhdh

-And he really likes it when you make the effort to open doors for him too but he’ll never have the nerve to admit it

Levi:

-Believe it or not, he warms up to you in less than a day...?

-It’s probably because he’s a navy commander and he’s used to having soldiers around and you sort of remind him of that

-Out of everyone, he reacts the least when he sees how you carry yourself because to him it’s second nature

-Even if he does tend to slouch most of the time

-Almost dropped to his knees and started worshiping you when you yelled at Mammon to give Levi his money back on your first day

-And then a friendship started to blossom (im not friendzoning y’all, relax)

-Levi has a tendency to just walk into your room with his laptop, point at the screen which is paused in the middle of an anime and go “Look, the protagonist is a knight. You’re also...really knightly. I like the protagonist. I, uh I like you too, I guess.”

-He loves how honest you are because he knows that no matter what you wouldn’t lie to him

-“MC, do you think I’m a yucky otaku?”

-“No.”

-“But-“

-“No.”

-“Oh ok.”

-But on the inside he’s like 🥰🥰💞💞💞💞

-I just think that a knightly MC would connect on an emotional level with Levi for a lot of reasons, idk

-He’s gonna be a sputtering mess when he realises how much effort you put into this relationship (platonic or romantic) and how loyal you are to it

-Like how you actually bother learning all of his stupid passwords because you are just as serious about them as he is

-He just crashed, give him a moment to reboot please

Satan:

-He takes a while to warm up to you because for some reason your overall demeanour reminded him of Lucifer lol

-He thought you might be just as stuck up as him

-It didn’t take him longer than a week or so to come to the sudden realisation that you are way more pleasant than his brother

-Like his daddy, you manage to earn his respect pretty quickly after that

-He just thought the way you handled everything that was thrown at you in DevilDom was very sophisticated but firm nonetheless, if that makes sense?

-Like, you weren’t itching to escalate fights or anything but your tone of voice could easily end a whole conversation if need be

-You were still a human of course, it would be real easy for some low rank demon to kidnap you or something

-But for some reason, your confidence seemed to intimidate a few of the weaker ones into leaving you alone

-Obviously, that didn’t mean you were completely safe or anything

-There were still others that could effortlessly overpower you

-Even so, Satan found it sort of reassuring that unlike some humans, you weren’t one to back down without a confrontation

-Don’t get me started on all those times you rebelled against Lucifer, because that’s what truly got him to get to know you better

-He found you pretty interesting and then that interest sort of evolved into actual fondness

-Another thing that caught his eye was that even though you have very strong feelings about justice and fairness, you are completely level headed most of the time

-And patience, while it’s something he can manage, is the one that he has been trying to control for centuries

-He learned a lot from you about behaviour, whether you intentionally taught it to him or not

-And if there is one thing Satan thinks highly of; it would be knowledge

-Therefore, from that point onward, your existence was so much more precious to him than your soul could ever be

Asmo:

-What can I say about our sweet Asmo?

-You could have the personality of a trashcan and he’d still love you

-You were so polite and honourable from the beginning to the point you managed to get the attention of the Avata of Lust himself????

-He thought you were pretty hot basically

-hoWEVER

-Your righteousness always sort of nagged him because he low-key believed Diavolo snuck in another angel into the program, I-

-And for some reason, your loyalty to everyone in general ticked him off immensely at the beginning

-Mainly because he recognised that’s one of the traits he lacks entirely and he came to the conclusion that he needs to revaluate himself on that one

-He is so desperate for your attention, he will tattle on his brothers just to get you to yell at them and then comfort him

-“MCCCCC, MAMMON STOLE MY NEWEST MAKE UP KIT AND IS ABOUT TO SELL IT ON AKUZON!”

-he is so petty istg

-Your nobility still catches him off guard every now and then

-Because you’ve been living with demons for so long and yet you’re still, theoretically speaking, pure?? get your head out of the gutter people

-He probably applauds you on the fact that you can even scare Lucifer on some occasions because imagine having a scarier death glare than the eldest prince of hell

-Asmo will personally buy you clothes that he thinks suit your “aesthetic” (wtf Asmo)

-Might’ve bought you a sword and then got shouted at by Lucifer because oops turns out it was cursed

-Again, supportive mom vibes

-“MC, do you know how stunning you look strutting around with that confidence of yours? Don’t get me started on your posTURE!”

-You pulled a chair for him once and he practically swooned lmao

Beel:

-He figures you’re really nice from the start

-Mostly because you kept running errands and opening doors for him even though he let it slip that he might lose control and eat you

-Like most brothers, he finds you comforting in a way

-Beel appreciates your honesty to him too because he can count on you to tell him when he’s doing something wrong

-And he sort of needs the validation that even though he blames himself for a lot of things that took place in the past, his brothers and you are more than ready to forgive him (even if they didn’t blame him to begin with)

-Rather than respect, Beel puts a lot of trust into you, which I would believe to be more intimate

-If it’s just the two of you hanging out, he has an easier time opening up about Lilith because he knows you would never judge him and respect his feelings enough to let him get it out of his system

-You always share your food with him and give him a bigger portion and he goes so soft-

-Like who allowed you to be this generous?

-Tbh, he thinks it’s sort of refreshing having someone like you around

-Beel has been surrounded by demons for millenniums now and he’s gotten used to their...uh ‘evilness’

-Ever since you got dropped off in DevilDom, you really stood out with your nobility and morals

-It was like a breath of fresh air in a way

-He may or may not believe you’re a good influence on his siblings-if you can even influence demons of all things

-I’m not saying he invites you to work out with him and give him honest criticism, but he definitely invites you to work out with him and give him honest criticism

Belphie:

-“Out of all the humans they could’ve chosen, they picked the most annoying one, oH MY FUCKING GO-I MEAN DAD-“

-You go up to the attic that one night after tricking Lucifer into vibing to some classical TSL tunes

-He spotted you and was immediately irritated

-Like, he KNEW you were going to be a pain in the ass just by judging your posture and how you carried yourself (very knightly)

-At the start, he’s even hesitant to lie to you because he had a suspicion you wouldn’t buy his bs

-(Spoiler alert: you didn’t but you went with it either way)

-It takes a while for you to forgive him when he literally fucking kills you because that was rude af but you got over it in time

-AFTER of the whole ‘Sorry-for-choking-you-can-we-be-friends-now’ incident, you still get on his nerves a lot but at this point, he believes that’s his punishment for being a murderous dickhead

-You don’t really piss him off tho, you just confuse him a lot

-Why are you so polite? You keep pulling chairs and opening doors for him??? Why are you treating him like royalty?? Stop it, he doesn’t want to be like Lord Diavolo (he def likes it when you do that)

-Pls stop dragging the poor man to breakfast, he just wants to sleep in-

-He doesn’t understand how you’re always one time for everything

-My dude tries to wake up 20 minutes early to get somewhere in time and he is still 2 hours late

-sTOP TRYING TO FORCE YOUR IDEALS ONTO HIM, HE’S A LITTLE SHIT WHO ENJOYS WATCHING PEOPLE SUFFER

-All the same, you’re a very forgiving person so he’s just grateful you don’t hate him or anything

-And in the end, it doesn’t really matter how much your chivalry and righteousness and all of that pisses him off every now and then

-Because he can’t deny the fact that you brought him and his brothers the peace they needed

-And he so loves it when you and Lucifer go head to head mhmm

Diavolo:

-This big tittied man right here takes a liking to you immediately

-A couple of days in DevilDom and he’s already inviting you for tea at his castle

-You managed to befriend the prince of hell faster than the demons you live with, huh

-He’s lonely ok? He loves having people over and having cozy chitchats

-Not to mention he thinks you’re such pleasant company!

-Most demons would be afraid to even say anything in his presence but you always speak your mind while continuing to be respectful and he’s so happy, you don’t understand-

-Only demons in close relations to Diavolo like Babrbatos and Lucifer actually know how much it takes for someone to anger him

-He doesn’t take offence to much lol

-And he’s really content that you acknowledged that

-He sometimes visits you in his spare time just to talk and hang out since Lucifer is a big meanie who doesn’t want to indulge him and Barbatos is busy making him dinner >:(

-SPEAKING OF- if you and Barbatos don’t bond then i don’t know what to tell you

-I mean, you would both have so many things in common (strong sense of loyalty, honesty, just in a way etc.)

-You’re his favourite guest to have over at the palace, sorry Luci you’ve been replaced

-He genuinely finds you interesting as well so please tell him stories from the human realm!! He’s dying to learn more!

-Diavolo notices you demeanour sort of gives off warrior vibes so-

-He really considered making you into a knight bc it’s Diavolo-what he says; goes

-“I know they’re human but they’ll be fine. Look how tough they are! They managed to survive a year with you and your brothers didn’t they?”

-“My Lord, that doesn’t amount to anything, please don’t get our human killed-“

[alpacaparkaseok]

The Pact - Date #7

Pairing/Genre: OT7 BTS x reader (not poly), idol!BTS, best friend BTS

Word Count: 7.2k

Premise: The truth about the pact the boys have about you has been revealed. What happens when you agree to go on a single date with each of them?

Warnings: a bit of talking down on yourself, the confusion continues, general fluff with a touch of angst 

a/n: this is the final date. guys...how is this going by so fast?? please let me know your thoughts on the date, on everything else overall...and I’ll see you soon? Next Saturday is the finale!

Date #7

series masterlist ∆∆∆ join the taglist

Note from the creator of this stupid idea:

I loved her first.

 “Who do you think it was? Any ideas?”

           “I…” you shrug. “No?”

           Gina arches a brow, staring you down from across your kitchen table. “So, that was a lie.”

           You can’t stop the laugh that bubbles up from your chest, Gina also chuckling. It’s a relief, the fact that she doesn’t hesitate to call you out. You’re grateful that you finagled her number from Jin, shooting him a text that looked a lot like this:

Me: Burn this after reading

Me: We can’t have any evidence !!

Kim Seokjinnie: ok, hi. I’m not burning my phone weirdo. I’ll just keep it away from Jungkook. What’s up??

Me: Hi. You know what I meant.

Me: Can you give me Gina’s number?

Kim Seokjinnie: Sure, I’ll send you the contact in a second. You two gonna hang out or something?

Me: Hopefully…do you think it’s weird if I just ask her out of the blue? Will she not wanna come?

Kim Seokjinnie: Nah, she’s pretty chill. I bet she’ll come

Kim Seokjinnie: *Kim Seokjinnie shared a contact with you*

Kim Seokjinnie: do you need anything before I burn my phone?

Me: no, thank you!! I owe you one. I’m short on friends rn, hopefully she’ll come over

Kim Seokjinnie: I’m sorry  miss you. We’ll all get to hang out once this is all over, I promise.

“Yah! I really don’t know. I mean they’ve all be so…”

“So what?”

You sigh, sounding like some kid in a dreamy teen movie. “Perfect?”

“There’s no such thing,” Gina huffs, leaning back in her chair. It’s a bit rickety, you’d found it at a yard sale with Namjoon and Jimin. You had just moved into your apartment, and realized that you were a little low on furniture. Together, you’d managed to find three mismatching chairs that made you grin each time you saw them.

It was a little odd at the time, you didn’t want to buy three chairs. Two seemed like plenty. They convinced you though, and looking back you understand why they were so adamant.

Wasn’t it rule #3? “Limit one-on-one interaction”? Three chairs made it so that there was always space for at least two of them.

Suddenly you look at the most average things in your house with different eyes.

Groaning, you rub your hands over your face. You’ve probably smudged your makeup, but you don’t care. It’s Friday night, you can do whatever you want.

“Unfortunately, I really think that there might be.” You let out a dry chuckle. “Seven dates with the world’s most perfect men. I knew I was screwed from the beginning, but this, I mean, I didn’t expect it to go this far.”

“On the bright side, you only have one more to go.” Gina gets up, stretching before moving to put her plate in the sink. She’d picked up some takeout on her way to your house, proving to you that you two are going to be friends for a long, long time.

“I’m terrified because of that. What happens after tomorrow’s date? I know it’s up to me, but I feel like I’m waiting for someone to come tell me the next step.”

Gina hums in agreement, shooting you an apologetic look. “Maybe I shouldn’t have pointed out how flirty they were at the haunted house. You never would have gotten into this mess.”

“No,” you wave her off. “It’s not your fault. Jungkook let it slip anyway, after the door closed on us in the basement. Ugh, I still get freaked out thinking about that. Has that happened since?”

Gina pauses over the sink, back turned to you as she runs her plate under the hot water. After a moment she shuts it off, turning around to wipe her hands off on a dish towel before leaning up against the counter.

“Erm…”

Your stomach drops. “What.”

“It’s just…” she crosses her arms and uncrosses them, unsure of what to do with her hands. “The door is connected to a little button on every employee’s key fob. You know, just for some extra scare factor.”

You meet her sheepish gaze with a blank stare. “So you’re telling me…”

“It’s just a part of the tour,” Gina shrugs. “Wait, what happened? He told you about the pact when the door closed? That’s…that’s honestly not the most romantic setting-”

“No no, we had a little moment after the door closed, and we almost kissed. But he stopped himself and said the I didn’t have to worry about him making a move. When we got out, I asked him why, and that’s when he mentioned the pact.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“So tomorrow is the last date, correct?”

           “Yup.”

           “Look,” Gina notices your worried expression. “Do yourself a favor. Let go. Don’t waste tomorrow thinking about what’s gonna happen next. Focus on the moment, ok? Then how about we get together next week sometime to talk everything over? If you feel like that might help, that is.”

           You definitely made the right choice in inviting Gina over. You can already feel your stress levels going down.

           “Ok.”

           You’re up early the next morning, earlier than you’d like. You’re not sure how long you’ve been sitting on your sofa, basking in the golden morning sun and watching the little dust motes float in the air, but it’s certainly been a while.

           For once, it’s quiet in your mind. You’re not sure why now, why today. There’s no doubt you’ll be your typical bumbling mess once Yoongi picks you up, but for now all is peaceful.

           It’s the last date. Somehow, despite how much you’ve enjoyed these little escapades, you feel relief at the thought. Knowing that you’ve made it nearly to the end without doing anything remarkably stupid (you’re still mortified that you and Jimin got kicked out of that basilica but oh well), and now you’re so close.  

           For now, you slide your worries under the rug, to be left there for the weekend. You curl your legs under you and lean your head back against the cushions to drink in the sunlight. It warms your skin, leaving you feeling even better than before.

           Yoongi is supposed to be here around four. Jungkook had sent you a quick text earlier in the week checking that you didn’t have any plans for Saturday afternoon and night. You didn’t bother to tell him that you always had all day open for them.

           While the exchange had been short, you couldn’t help but wonder if he was blushing just as much as you when his contact popped up on your screen. In an instant you were plunged into the memory of clinging to him just outside your front door, Jungkook’s shaky breaths the only thing keeping you planted in reality.

           Either way, it was safe to say that you were a blushing mess despite the simplicity of the text. He kept it strictly professional, not once alluding to the events of last Saturday. But you could still hear those words he uttered when he asked if you ever thought about what might have happened if he’d kissed you in the haunted house when he had the chance.

           “I do. Every day.”

           Of course you thought about it. You let out an amused huff on the couch, laughing to yourself. Who wouldn’t? But the only thing was the fact that you were thinking about a lot of things. Not just Jungkook.

           Or his lips, for that matter.

           The couch rustles as you get up, deciding to change out of your red sweatshirt for a green one. You’d been instructed to dress warm, which made you wonder what was planned for today. Outside everything looks warm and pleasant, certainly no need for anything too heavy.

           By the time afternoon rolls around, you’re tempted to call up Gina for a late lunch or something. To say you’re antsy is an understatement; you’re positively losing it. The clock on the wall has decided to try its hand at stopping time altogether, and you think it’s doing a pretty good job of it. Every time you glace over, seemingly no time has passed.

           This time, you really start to wonder if no time has passed. You swear it’s been stuck at 3 o’clock for a while-

           The sound of someone knocking on your door has you nearly tipping over from where you perch trying to grab the clock.

           For some stupid reason, you’re frozen to your spot at the far end of your living room. Holding the clock in your hands, you jump a little as a second tentative knock sounds.

           To your utter mortification, your mouth opens and you yell out, “Come in!”

           You’re still frozen in place when the door opens and Yoongi pokes his head in. His eyes immediately land on you, a sheepish smile that he has a hard time containing immediately breaking out.

           “You’re not planning on throwing that at me, right?” He asks, making you glare down at the clock you cling to.

           “Oh.” Your knuckles have turned white, and somehow your heart has decided to try its hand at sprinting a marathon. “No. I- it’s broken. I think.”

           Yoongi shuffles inside, closing the door gently behind him before wandering over to you. His pale complexion makes the pink on his cheeks easy to spot. Somehow the fact that he’s blushing makes you blush.

           “Do you have batteries around here?” He asks quietly, hiding his amusement.

           “Maybe in the kitchen?” You brush past him, handing off the clock. “Would you mind getting the old batteries out?”

           He mumbles out a sure, plopping down on your sofa while he gets to work on the clock. He’s wearing a similar outfit to you, which makes you smile. It’s not very often these days that he sports a bandana and you wonder if he somehow knew that you love the way he looks in it. His hair looks particularly fluffy as it kisses his forehead, the dark bandana giving him an air of coolness you know you could never pull off.

           Rummaging around your kitchen drawers, you pause when you realize what you’re doing. Are you stalling? What’s the rush to fix a clock when you have Min Yoongi in the other room waiting to take you out?

           Closing the drawer, you take a deep breath and shake your head.

           “Sorry Yoongi,” you call out, trudging back into the living room. “I’m an idiot.”

           He looks at you over his shoulder, a smirk tugging at his lips. “What’s your reasoning?”

           “Ouch.”

           Yoongi chuckles, setting the clock down on the coffee table before getting to his feet. “Wow, is it just me or…”

           You wince. “This got off to a bad start, huh.”

           “Yeah.”

           Looking at each other from across the room, you realize just how much you’ve missed him. His witty sarcastic remarks, his honesty.

           Him.

           “Can we start over? Go knock on the door again.”

           Yoongi’s already on his way, huffing out a laugh as he steps outside. “Alright, see you in a second.” The door clicks shut behind him, and you’re suddenly left with the silence of your house.

           As Yoongi timidly knocks on the door, the same sense of calm you experienced this morning settles over you.

           The seventh date. No more guessing who’s on the other side of the door, no more anxious glances in the mirror to check that everything looks flawless. It’s just you, Yoongi, and the door between you.

           There’s already a smile on your face as you open that door, finding Yoongi standing with his hands in his pocket. He returns your grin, feeling like a fellow conspirator in a heist that has yet to be planned.

           “I’m here,” he announces, then adds with a chuckle, “finally.”

           “Took you long enough,” you tease, reaching out to grab his jacket and pull him inside. He feigns a horrified expression at your flirty nature, but you just roll your eyes. You’re not sure who wraps their arms around the other first, but the next thing you know, you’re wrapped up in a tight embrace.

           I missed you, is what you want to say, but the words get caught in your throat. The lump that’s formed there only grows thicker with emotion as Yoongi’s gravelly voice rumbles against your hair.

           “How’re you holding up?”

           Your arms fall around his waist, ever aware of his shoulder. Even though he says he’s completely healed now, you aren’t taking any chances. It’s quiet for a long moment as you struggle to find an answer.

           “I…fine. I’m fine.” You pull away and arch an eyebrow at him, pleased to see that is cheeks are still rosy despite the serious look in his eye. “How are you holding up?”

           He lets out a breathy laugh, dropping your gaze. “Fine.” Then, when he catches your disbelieving stare, he states as innocently as possible, “What? Aren’t we lying to each other tonight?”

           “You suck.”

           “See!” He exclaims as you step out of his grasp to grab your things. “You always do that when you’ve been caught in a lie!”

           “Ugh, yah! I wasn’t lying,” you turn around to face him, walking backward toward your room. “I’m fine, really.”

           He shrugs. “And so am I.”

           You stifle your laughter as you enter your room, grabbing your things and wondering if you should grab a coat. “Do I really need a coat?” You call down the hall.

           “Yes!”

           Pursing your lips, you snatch the puffy monstrosity from your closet before turning to head out. Double checking that you have everything you need; your eyes can’t help but glance at the item sitting atop your dresser.

           You stick your tongue out at it. A few seconds later it’s tucked safely away in your top drawer and you’re heading out into the hallway. Your stomach does an uneasy flip as you recall the words that are practically burned in the backs of your eyelids now.

           I loved her first.

           Yoongi gets up from off the couch, waiting for you beside the door. His dark eyes survey you as you walk toward him. “Good to go?” He asks quietly. Clutching your coat a little tighter to your chest, you nod.

           The two of you head out, locking up your apartment and settling in the car that Yoongi drove over. Before long, you’re out on the highway, speeding toward your destination.

           Which, you’ve just realized, is still a mystery to you.

           “Sooo…” You begin, smiling lazily at Yoongi. You take a moment to admire his hands that are wrapped around the steering wheel. “Where are we going?”

           A smile tugs at his lips, but he manages to contain it as he adopts a serious expression. He glances over at you. “We’re going to see the sea.”

           “We’re…” you stutter, furrowing your brows. “We’re going to see the sea?”

           A breathy chuckle escapes him. “Yeah. But it’s a long drive, so are you down to listen to a murder-mystery with me?”

           “YES.”

            You’re still pretty sure that it was the nosy maid that did it by the time you arrive at your destination. Two hours, one murder-mystery short audiobook, and several snacks later, the sun is well on its way to the horizon when Yoongi pulls off to a sandy parking lot filled to the brim with cars.

           There’s tons of people mulling about, several of them appear to be young families who smile fondly as their children laugh and play in the sand. There’s a couple of food-trucks that have popped up on the beach, which sport long lines. Yoongi observes them woefully, seeming to come to some sort of understanding with himself before moving to get out of the car.

           “Woah, what’s with all the people? Is this beach always this busy?”

           It’s a beach you’ve never been to before, the pristine sand glowing as the sun makes its way across the sky.

           “Today’s a special occasion,” Yoongi explains, popping the trunk and rummaging around. “We should probably pick out a spot now before all the good ones are taken.”

           You come around to the back of the car to meet him, taking the blanket he extends out to you. Leaving your big coat in the backseat, you hope he doesn’t scold you and tell you to put it on. Right now it’s windy, but fairly warm. No need to look like a living marshmallow just yet.

           Before you can inquire after what the special occasion is, Yoongi passes you a couple of water bottles and begins rattling off instructions.

           “How about I jump in line to buy us some dinner,” the way he says it so casually has your heart skipping a beat for some reason, “and you head down the beach to scout out a decent spot?”

           “But what kind of spot do you mean? Is there a show or something?”

           Yoongi pauses, closing the trunk and running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, something like that. A show. Just find a spot that you like, I’ll come find you with our food, ok?”

           “Ay ay, captain.” You trudge away, hoisting the blanket up higher in your arms as you begin to look for an empty space. The immediate surrounding beach area appears to be pretty packed, which has you marching farther and farther away from the parking lot.

           You grin as a couple of children race past you, giggling as they fly their kites. It’s looks like it’s a little boy and with his younger sister, trying their best to keep their kites afloat in wind. Waving at them, your smile only grows as the boy sheepishly turns away and the girl cheerfully waves back.

           It feels like you walk for years before finding a clearing. You were definitely looking for a semi-secluded spot, not too keen on spending your long-awaited date with Yoongi surrounded by strangers. It doesn’t even occur to you to ask someone what the big deal is about today before you’re laying the blanket out. Not wanting to leave anything unattended just for it to blow away, you decide to just be patient until Yoongi finds you.

           The sand is warm beneath the blanket as you plop down, resting with your face turned toward the sun as you let out a content sigh. Despite the chill of the wind, the sun warms you right up.

           “Why are you alone?”

           Peeking one eye open at the little voice, you’re delighted to see the same little girl from earlier standing a little ways away. She watches you with a meek expression, her kite forgotten at her feet.

           “Oh, I’m not alone,” you explain. “I’m just waiting for my friend to come find me. He went to go get food.”

           “Oh.” The young girl shuffles her feet. “My mommy says that I need to get all my wiggles out before the show.”

           You chuckle. “Really? What show are we watching tonight? Is it Disney?” That would certainly make sense for all of the young families here tonight. Did Yoongi bring you to a beach-front outdoor movie?

           “No, silly!” The girl giggles at your questions. “The sky’s coming to say hello!”

           “What?”

           “That’s what my mommy said. She said, ‘Young-mi get your wiggles out, the sky is coming to say hello soon!’”

           You blink, a little amused by Young-mi’s earnest response. “I see��I didn’t know that the sky was coming to say hello tonight.”

           “Then why are you here?”

           “Oh,” you crane your neck toward the parking lot, but it’s too far away to see Yoongi. “My friend brought me, as a surprise.”

           “Wow,” Young-mi utters in a reverent tone. “Can I meet your friend?”

           “I don’t see why not.”

           With a gleeful shout, Young-mi takes off running, her kite skipping along the ground behind her. She runs toward her family, her mother grinning at the sight before reaching out to pull her into her arms. You watch on with a forgotten smile, wondering for a split second what that would be like.

           If you squint, that could be Yoongi sitting beside Young-mi’s mother, throwing his head back with laughter at something his daughter says to him. Their son crouches in the sand nearby, digging around as though searching for gold.

           Laying down with a soft sigh, you close your eyes and let the little daydream take over. Here, at the beach. Telling your children that this is where you had your first date; laughing as they make disgusted faces when Yoongi plants a loud kiss on your cheek-

           “Did the nosy maid get to you?”

           Yoongi stands above you with arms laden with food. He blocks out the sun, the rays coming around to make him appear like an angel. Judging from the delicious smells radiating from the food he carries, you think he actually might be.

           “Ah, so you agree that you think it was her that murdered Duke Rittington?” Your voice sounds a little croaky, a testament to the fact that you were just dozing a moment ago. Leaning up to ease some of the food from his arms, Yoongi snorts.

           “No. It was obviously the son. Why can’t you see it?”

           Rolling your eyes, you pat a spot next to you on the blankets. Yoongi takes the seat without hesitation. “Because, the son seems like too easy of a suspect. Whereas the maid-”

           The screams of Young-mi as she rushes toward you cut you off. “You have a boyfriend?!”

           “Oh, no.”

           Yoongi leans over, still busy arranging the bags of food – is that a cheeseburger you see? – around the blanket. “Who’s that?” He mumbles.

           “I, uh, made a friend while you were grabbing food,” you explain with a small smile.

           Now Young-mi reaches your blanket, dropping to her knees as she gazes up at Yoongi with wide, innocent eyes. “Hi, my name is Young-mi and I’m four years old. I’m the second tallest in my class.” Young-mi prattles off information, her large eyes never once leaving Yoongi’s face. “Are you her boyfriend? I hope you’re her boyfriend.”

           Yoongi lets out a startled laugh. “You do? Why’s that?”

           “You’re so pretty.”

           Now both of you burst out laughing, Young-mi looking utterly confused at your outburst. Yoongi covers his face with his hands, shaking his head.

           “What? What’s so funny?” Young-mi questions.

           You grin at her. “You think he’s pretty?” The little girl nods enthusiastically. “I do too.”

           Yoongi peers over at you at this comment, an unasked question in his eyes. The pink in his cheeks has intensified, as has your own blush.

           “Aren’t I supposed to be the one complementing you?” He asks under his breath. You shrug.

           “You brought food, so now we’re even.”

           Young-mi lingers a little while longer, asking a few questions and drawing in the sand. Munching down on your cheeseburger, you eye Young-mi’s kite.

           “Do you mind if I try to fly your kite for a second?” The question is out of your mouth before you can fully process it, but Young-mi looks up at you excitedly.

           “Yes!!” She squeals, immediately dragging the little handle over to you. “You have to run really fast, that’s what my mommy told me. Then it’ll fly!”

           Glancing back at Yoongi as you clamber to your feet, you don’t miss the fond smile he wears as he watches the interaction take place. You wave at him, heading off down the beach with Young-mi. Once you’ve walked far enough, you wink down at her.

           “Ok, you run on ahead and I’ll catch up in a few seconds.”

           The girl wastes no time running off, her laughter making you feel lighter than you have in weeks. Once she’s far enough off, you take off after her. She heads straight toward her family, who smile at you as you attempt to get the kite off the ground.

           Sand flies up behind you as you race, and you catch a glimpse of Yoongi with his phone out, recording you with a wide smile on his face. The sun has hit the horizon now, a dizzying array of colors sending your mind into a joyful frenzy. Up ahead, Young-mi has successfully made it to her family and is waiting for you to catch up. She jumps up and down as the kite soars above you, the little pinwheels attached to it spinning around in the wind.

           A bit more energy overtakes you, and you sprint the last few yards toward Young-mi, unable to stop the laugh that jumps out of you. You feel so free, here on the beach. It’s almost like you’re up there flying with the kite-

           “Wait!”

           Someone shouts it, you’re not exactly sure who, but by the time the plea registers in your ears, it’s too late. Foot catching in the hole that Young-mi’s brother had been digging earlier, you feel a twist of pain before tumbling to the ground.

           You cry out, barely managing to catch yourself before faceplanting it. The handle from Young-mi’s kite digs painfully into your hand, but that’s the least of your problems at the moment.

           Young-mi’s family rushes over to you, but before they reach you Yoongi is dropping to your side.

           “Oh,” you pant, “hi Yoongs.”

           “Are you alright?” He’s also panting, and you wonder if he had begun running after you before you even fell, foreseeing your path. “Your foot…”

           “I am so sorry!” Young-mi’s mother stoops down on your other side, her husband right behind her. “We completely forgot that Doyun even dug that hole! Can you move? Are you in pain?”

           From where you’re laying belly-down on the sand, you can’t help but feel the burn of embarrassment in your cheeks. “I…move? Yeah, I can – ah never mind.” You wince as you attempt to get to your feet only for the dull ache in your right foot to flare up to a fiery red pain. Yoongi immediately reaches out for you, unsure of what to do. His hands ghost over your leg, but retract when you hiss in pain.

           “Here, my husband-” Young-mi’s mother points over her shoulder to the man in question. “He’s a nurse. Honey, could you…?”

           “Do you mind if I take a look at your ankle?” The man asks in a gentle voice. “Just to make sure nothing’s broken.”

           With a nod, you allow both him and Yoongi to help you swivel around to sit the correct way, the blush you already have deepening even more when Yoongi takes up a spot at your back. He gently pushes your shoulders back until you’re leaning into his chest, his arms coming to wrap around you in a protective manner.

           When you wince as the man delicately presses down on your already swollen ankle, Yoongi begins talking.

           “So, is it just me, or has this entire night been a disaster?”

           You let out a choked laugh. “No, Yoongs. Well, maybe it has, but it’s all my fault. I can’t believe I fell, how embarrassing…”

           “Oh, are you two out on a date? Er, sorry for prying…”

           Both you and Yoongi awkwardly chuckle. “No, no…um, yeah. We are.”

           “It’s our first date, actually,” Yoongi adds as an afterthought.

           “How exciting! Honey, it’s their first date, did you hear that?”

           The man currently inspecting your ankle spares the two of you a kindly glance. “Good for you two. You make a good looking couple.”

           “But I swear I’ve seen you before,” the mother comments, squinting at Yoongi. “Where do I know you from…”

           You can feel Yoongi tense up behind you, but he doesn’t say anything yet. Instead he takes to finding your hands (which you’ve slipped into your sweatshirt pocket to avoid accidentally punching the man poking and prodding at your foot), eventually curling his hands around yours and steadily unclenching your fists.

           “Oh! I know it! Do you do commercials?”

           Yoongi lets out an audible sigh of relief, which makes you smile for half a second before a particularly hard prod at your ankle sends you into a tailspin.

           “Yeah, I’ve done a few commercials.”

           “I knew it. How’s it looking, honey?”

           Her husband sits back on his heels, giving you a nod. “Nothing appears to be broken, you just twisted it pretty good. Babe, grab that icepack out of the cooler. You should keep ice on it for a while to counter the swelling.”

           A second later you’re handing a little bag of ice. “I don’t wanna take your ice,” you comment lamely. Yoongi chuckles in your ear, pulling back from you and standing.

           “It’s just a disposable pack we used for the cooler,” the mother explains, waving off your concern. “No need to worry. We’ve got plenty more. Now, go enjoy your date!”

           “Yeah, try your best to have fun. And keep ice on that, on and off for the next couple of days. It shouldn’t give you too much trouble after that.” With a wink toward Yoongi, your temporary nurse gives him a little nudge. “You seem like a good man. I think you’re in good hands here, miss.”

           Young-mi bids you a mournful goodbye as you limp away with Yoongi, quickly coming to find that sand isn’t the kindest to people hopping around on one leg. You’ve made it all of four hops while clinging to Yoongi before he stops.

           “Hop on my back,” he commands, stepping directly in front of you.

           You blanch. “But Yoongi…your shoulder.”

           “It’s fine. Just hop on. You don’t need to limp all the way back to where we’re sitting.” When you hesitate another moment, he looks back at you over his shoulder, his dark eyes sparking in the sunset. “Jagiya.”

           Well, the man puts up a convincing argument.

           Yoongi crouches down so you don’t have to jump, and with a bit of careful maneuvering you manage to hop onto his back. His hands grip your thighs, hoisting you up a bit higher which makes you gasp a little. Your arms instinctively wrap around his neck, careful to avoid putting too much pressure on shoulder.

           Setting off toward your abandoned blanket and food, you can’t help but feel a rise of disappointment in your chest.

           “Yoongi?” You mumble, almost sounding like an embarrassed child.

           “Hmm?”

           Hiding your face in the back of his neck, you groan. “I’m sorry.”

           Yoongi’s steps falter before he continues on, confusion evident in his tone. “Sorry? For what?”

           The calm that you felt earlier has completely shattered at this point, and you grit your teeth against the pain in your ankle and the onslaught of emotions that surface. What happened to picture perfect? Why couldn’t you focus?

           Other than sitting in the car together, you feel as though you’ve hardly touched base with Yoongi. You haven’t seen the man in nearly two months, and yet here you are distracted as ever. Distracted with your dumb broke clock, distracted with the audiobook, distracted with a kite.

           Yoongi stops in his tracks as he feels hot tears against his neck. “Jagiya?”

           “I- I’m so sorry, Yoongi,” you blubber. “I’m an idiot! I c-can’t focus on anything tonight and…and now I’ve made everything fall apart by going and getting h-hurt…Yoongi, it hurts so bad. A-and now I’m complaining, which is making everything worse!”

           You’re surprised when Yoongi doesn’t say a single thing, instead picking up where he left off as he trudges on toward the blanket. In response to his silence, you continue in your repentant monologue.

           “And you waited in line to get us fooood,” you bite down on your lip as you fight the urge to wail. “It’s probably c-cold now, and you waited for s-so long to get it…I feel like such a bad person…if you don’t wanna continue the date, I u-understand. I promise I won’t tell anyone if you want! J-just, I’m so sorry, Yoongi. I’ve completely ruined this, and you drove t-two hours to get me here….” You’ve reached the blanket now, Yoongi gently sets you down, and you hobble on one foot as you half-expect him to grab his keys and set off toward the car. “I just can’t think straight because I read that stupid pact and-”

           “Woah, back up.”

           Swiveling around to face you, Yoongi has a frown etched into his face. It makes you want to turn and run, to crawl into a cave to die from embarrassment, but it’s the fact that you can barely manage to stand on one foot at the moment – let alone run – that has you standing still.

           “You read the pact?” You blink, hopping a little. When Yoongi sees your struggle he reaches out to you, steadying you. “Here, let’s sit.”

           “W-we’re staying?”

           Yoongi gazes down at you, the look in his eyes turning unspeakable soft. “Yes, jagiya. Unless you aren’t feeling up to it anymore?” He looks as though the thought of leaving now pains him, but he waits patiently for your answer.

           “I wanna stay.”

           “Good. Now, what’s this about you reading the pact?”

           Having successfully turned into a sniffling mess, you wipe away your tears with an angry swipe. It’s time to come clean.

           “I found a copy in Jin’s room-”

           “What were you doing in Jin’s room?!” Yoongi whispers frantically, growing more concerned by the second. You wave him off.

           “-and I took it! I knew I shouldn’t, but I just wanted to know, you know? So I stole it but that was stupid because then I saw that thing on the back…the little note.” Your words trail off, unable to even say the word lovewhen Yoongi’s looking at you like he’s unsure of whether he wants to laugh or cry.

           “The little…note?”

           “Yeah, you know…” You shake your head, moving on. “And since I saw that, I’ve been a mess. Like, an actual mess. I finally called Gina help just to get some help, I needed someone to talk to because you know, I can’t talk to you guys right now which is stupid. But I’m still so lost and I screwed everything up and my ankle hurts Min Yoongi!”

           You’ve stunned yourself into silence with your outburst, Yoongi across from you looks a bit lost himself as he sits back on his heels. It’s clear the moment he comes to a realization.

           “The note.”

           It’s all you can do to breathe normally and not burst out into tears again. Yoongi’s expression turns mournful when he sees you.

           “Oh, jagiya…” leaning forward, Yoongi somehow manages to pull you into his lap. Wrapping his arms around you and tucking your head close to his chest, Yoongi pulls you in as close as he can. He sways gently back and forth, a hand coming up to cup your cheek to make you look at him.

           You do so begrudgingly, feeling like nothing more than a large child. However, the moment you meet his eyes, it hits you like a lightning strike.

           “Do you remember,” he begins quietly, “that time when your final paper accidentally got deleted? All you had left to do on it was add the reference page. You were distraught, remember?”

           Of course you do. It’s the stuff of nightmares. Countless hours spent laboring over a final essay for a class you loathed, only to make a stupid mistake and delete it all. All of it, all nineteen pages were gone in a blink. Your hard work along with it.

           “I remember you called me, a sobbing mess. Obviously I thought you’d hurt yourself, the way you were crying about killed me.” He tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear, leaving you completely enraptured in his spell as he continues speaking. “I fought with Namjoon because I needed to go see you, but we had a schedule. It was an interview, I don’t even remember for what or with whom, but I was so angry. I seriously thought I was gonna punch him. Then I remembered he goes to the gym a lot more than me, so I didn’t.”

           He manages to make you crack a small grin at that. The sight spurs him on. “But I’ll never forget the sight I saw when I finally made it out to your house later that night. It was like what, two in the morning? No one knew I was even going over, which obviously I did on purpose. I didn’t want to get into another argument. When I walked in your apartment, you were sat at the kitchen table. Remember?”

           The memory is vague, tinged with exhaustion and disappointment, but it’s there. You’d set up camp at your kitchen table all day, missing all other appointments just to try to rewrite your paper. You were half delirious at that point, staring at the screen seemed equal to burning at the stake.

           “I’ve never seen you look more exhausted in my entire life,” Yoongi chuckles. “I remember I was ready to write the paper for you, I was so sad for you. But when I made it over there, I was floored to see that you’d already written it. Not only that, but you’d written twenty-seven pages. Twenty-seven! Who does that?!” He shakes his head at you, looking absolutely shocked.

           “When I asked you why you would do that, you just shrugged and said, ‘why not reach for the stars?’ Then you submitted it, stood up, walked over to me and gave me a hug before going straight to bed. I was so shocked that I just stood there for ages, trying to fathom what had just happened.”

           Yoongi sighs, glancing up at the night sky. You admire his jawline from this angle, nuzzling in a little closer to him for warmth. He notices that you didn’t bring your coat out with you, giving you a playful glare before gently rubbing his hands up and down your arms.

           “Why did you tell me that?”

           You can feel his shrug. “You are more capable, more special than you will ever know. I’ve always kept that in my heart, over the years. Why not reach for the stars? Jagiya…”

           Yoongi shuffles a little bit before cupping your chin and pointing toward the horizon where the sun has slipped down. The night sky is becoming more visible by the second, a few stray stars winking down at you.

           “Look.” He points at a certain spot in the sky just in time for you to see a streak of breathtaking light.

           A falling star.

           In the span of a few minutes, you’re completely speechless as the sky continues to darken and your eyes are glued heavenward. Gradually, more and more falling stars dart across the sky, taking your breath away. As they continue, you recall Young-mi’s words. The sky is coming to say hello.

           Yoongi reaches for your hand, easily enveloping it while tracing the outline of your knuckles.

           “You,” Yoongi breathes out, sending tingles down your spine. “Are the stars I’ve been reaching for ever since that night.”

           Heart thundering against your ribs, you turn to look at him only to find his eyes also trained on the heavens. He speaks the words softly, almost to himself, but you still catch them.

           “You’re a star, all the way up there…and I’m all the way down here. Maybe all I’m meant to do is admire you from afar. But for tonight, just for a moment, I’ll hold you.” His eyes slide down to meet yours, glinting with pure starlight. Cold and beautiful. Hurtling toward you, burning up in your atmosphere and leaving you wondering what would happen if you let him in.

           If it would lead to utter destruction or the most beautiful thing you’ve ever witnessed.

           All words have escaped you at this moment in time, but you don’t feel the need to scramble for some sort of a response. Instead you settle for snuggling in a bit closer, allowing Yoongi to hold you a bit tighter.

           Tonight, he’ll hold you close to his chest while what will later be recorded as the most prominent meteor shower in recent history rains down above you. The dark night sky is set aflame with streaks of silver as falling stars graze the earth, sharing a sweet goodnight kiss as they hurtle through space. You marvel at the seemingly never-ending parade the night sky puts on, relishing the way Yoongi keeps your warm as he also marvels at the wonder above you.

           There’s no words that are exchanged for the entirety of the meteor shower, the only form of communication found in the patterns Yoongi traces out against the back of your hand and the way he gazes down at you from time to time. As though making sure you’re really there.

           It’s a long while before the meteor shower begins to fade, and it’s only when you hear Yoongi softly calling your name that you realized you’ve dozed off.

           “It’s over, jagiya,” he coos, brushing hair away from your eyes. “Let’s get you to the car, then you can sleep the rest of the way home.”

           Somehow you two manage to make it to the car, you yourself being much more coherent by then due to the sharp pains in your ankle. You realize that you two are some of the few people left at the beach, making you wonder when everyone else left.

           Your eyes are half-closed when Yoongi begins to drive away, your hand finding his atop the console.

           “You know you don’t need to worry about us, right?” Yoongi mumbles out, glancing over at you with a worried expression. “We’ll support whatever you decide to do. Remember what I said before? You’re the most capable person I know. You don’t need us, not really. Just…be happy.”

           You mumble out something incoherent, not completely realizing that he’s referring to the aftermath of the pact until you’re already asleep.

           The next thing you know, you’re parked in front of your apartment and Yoongi is grinning down at you from the passenger side door.

           “C’mon,” he urges, helping you out of the car. “Careful with the ankle.”

           “Mmm.”

           It takes a bit of careful maneuvering to get up the stairs to your apartment, but you manage to make it. Leaning up against the door, you fumble for your keys.

           Once you’ve found them, you hand them straight over to Yoongi. You’re far too tired to attempt unlocking your door at the moment. He laughs at your behavior, shooting you a proud gummy smile when he unlocks the door. You don’t even have to ask before he’s assisting you inside, helping you hobble to your room before turning to leave.

           “Thank you, Yoongi. For everything.”

           Yoongi smiles down at his shoes. “We’ll swing by tomorrow to check up on you if that’s ok?”

           We.

           Your stomach flips to remember that you’re over now with these dates. Now what-

           “Or just shoot me a text? I know that might be awkward if we all show up…”

           “Thank you. I’ll text you?” You sigh, running your hands over your face. “Yoongi, I…” You trail off, staring up at him from your bed as your mind and heart races. There’s just no words.

           With a soft smile, he leans down and pecks your nose. The innocent gesture has your ears turning red, which widens his grin.

           “I know.” He whispers back.

           And then he’s gone.

           And you’re left here, suddenly colder than ever.

main masterlist

the dates are DONE. please let me know your thoughts, I love hearing from you! Tomorrow I'll be opening up a poll for your top two dates, so stay tuned for that! 

alsooo stay tuned this week because I may have a lil bonus chapter for you guys 

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