#i am unable to process
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swag-a-muffinz · 2 years ago
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The Game Grumps played Sam and Max: Hit the Road aND I CANT-- TWO OF MY FAVORITE THINGS AAAHHH
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Currently being anything but normal about them
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HOLD ON
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ED IS IN THAT SCENE?????
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infinitelyweary · 24 days ago
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Has anyone endlessly dissected Armand's subtle Marius shade yet
#iwtv#iwtv armand#LESSER skill 💅🏽✨#im sincerely so curious to see how their dynamic plays out once he finds out marius is alive#bc it seems like he still thinks hes dead as of s2#as far as i can tell book!armand doesnt find out marius is alive until he reads lestats book?? which will never not fuck me up#book!lestat is truly aint shit for hearing armands Tale of Woe then kicking it at marius’s mcmansion for a week#writing and publishing a book about it meanwhile never letting his friend armand who he ‘loves’ know that his fucking maker is still alive#but anyway in the show theyre definitely leaning into armand being more embittered towards marius which i loveeee#vs in the books where he seems more ambivalent?#its hard bc u can make a strong reading of book!armand as deeply resentful#but unable to process that relationship enough to understand his feelings about it#but ar is so shit at character development/keeping emotional consistency that it feels like a fluke when something actually tracks#like theres a great moment in qotd where marius is seeing armand again for the first time since his ‘death’ and marius is all hugging him#and armand is just sort of solemn and passively allowing it and not rly engaging with him#but then when marius needs him armand goes to his side and comforts him a few chapters later#and i think theres a lot you can glean from those two interactions but since ar spends no time digging into that at all its like…..#did it even mean anything? or am i imagining a better story than im actually reading#she just has this knack for laying the groundwork of a deeply fascinating character dynamic and then never fully seeing it to fruition#even in armands own book which is largely dedicated to exploring that relationship his feelings on marius stay pretty unresolved#he feels conflicted at the start and conflicted at the end and telling his story doesnt illuminate anything he still just feels the same#i can sit around and make different interpretations forever but the text never Goes There enough to be satisfying for me#and im not fucking reading blood and gold so if the insight i seek lies within someone just tell me. pls
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petiolata · 2 months ago
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My relationship with my writing is so bad right now. If we were a couple, we'd be teetering on the brink of divorce.
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nabaath-areng · 7 days ago
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im having the worst body day in a good while in terms of pain but i refuse to lay down. for there lies the road to the devil (mental health spiraling with nothing to distract from it). i SHOULD cook. but im not sure ill be able to with the pain. especially since the pain is because it feels like literally nothing is sticking together, like im much more bendy and hypermobile and useless than normal, which severely affects both motor skills and body strength. not to mention that this is causing a bad jaw day where so chewing is pain cause i already cant keep it in place and keep my mouth properly closed. i keep complaining but like, holy fuck i want off this illness ride
#i wanna paint my nails also but i dont need to i just feel like it and also thatd cause worse pain but also hhrhgghh#glitter................. sparkles.....#but also i wanna shower cause im cold but i wont be able to stand up right now AND handle potentially passing out#id like to not slip and injure myself if i can at all help it if thats not too much to ask...#man im typing and causing myself pain from it but like what else am i supposed to fucking DOOOOOO#GGRRREAAAAAAAAA#im struggling to comprehend how its NOT the norm to be like this#like what do you MEAN this isnt the default human experience. what do you mean there are people who are free from this#at first i didnt understand i was fucked up because everyone told me im overreacting and everyone has it#only to find out that no they fucking dont and ive been damaged beyond repair trying to reach other peoples ability level#like how do you NOT feel angry and bitter about that? i dont WANT to be but abled people sell you a fucking lie#and then punish you for noticing signs that somethings amiss. and then YOURE the one whos demanding for being burnt out beyond repair#and unable to pretend youre fine and just like them for their comforts sake. god im sorry im just so#i cannot explain this as anything else but an ongoing process of grief and trauma and mourning#and i want to believe in reincarnation solely so that i could have another chance at life#where im not sick and forced to continue giving up the only things that made this pain at all bearable in the first place#im sorry ill be fine or rather i HAVE to be fine because otherwise i dont know what to do with myself and thats crushing me from within#silvi talks#i need a tag for my stupid annoying whining about my fucked up flesh lmao
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lemongogo · 1 year ago
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can i ask.how u guys practice ur creativity <3 how u practice ur imagination or like.. how u experiment with ur art, how u come to ideas and how u develop them.<3 pretty please <3
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#smthing i have always struggled w.is feeling like i can only draw things that r handed 2 me.#as in.an idea or concept that already exists#chara or conflict that already exists.Scene that alr exists.#and i think it can be soo limiting bc when i have that sort of creative desire but nothing 2 reflect off of it#i feel like im unable to do anything/get anywhere bc im unable to do that mental legwork myself ykwim#like comic artists r SOOO JAW DROP INSPIRING TO MEE bc not only are u envisioning ur own sequences/situations#but u are able to imagine even the most MUNDANE interactions within those scenarios u know#like the transitory panels and the quiet moments and the every day stillness#and i feel like.its not even a poor attempt on my behalf its like.i cant Even attempt it.like my brain is soo empty#and soo static and noiseless that i am like gauhh......#i can practice lines all day long and practice colors and practice anatomy or Whatever bc its something concrete#and its in front of me and i can pry apart the physical technicalities until i understand it better#but my MIND???ABSTRACTION>? THOUGHTS .ough its so hard#and i really want to push past that but i dont know how and its so .. demoralizing to think that ill get there One Day but i feel#one million and two days away.and not making active process towards it.#i know the first step is to build ur visual library and i feel liek. idk i FEEL LIKEEE theres more 2 it that im missing#but also im depressed as hell n my job is killing my creative drive and the seasonal stuff isnt helping#so maybe i just need 2 give it time (true) but i also like.man i dont know. i want 2 do something w my hands#but everything ive been doing so far has felt soo .hard and fruitless and i definitely dont want 2 turn art into such a stressful thing#fruitless as in like.i dont get any personal satisfaction w it.idgaf abt monetization or algorithms or any of tht#but smtimes thats just what happens and i have 2 weather through and know ill be more equipped 4 this some other time#SAWRYYY IM ALWAYS GOING ON AND ONNN im nromal im normal<3 i just rly like art and it sucks balls whn it feels out of reach#sigh cry fart scroll.(:salute:)
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chodzacaparodia · 3 months ago
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Me to myself, when I planned a short fic, but the word count had already exceeded my expectations and there was still no end in sight: SHUT UP, SHUT UP! WHY CAN'T YOU SHUT UP? STOP THIS MADNESS AND SHUT UP!
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the-fallen-collective · 6 months ago
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What is like to be a kid?
What is like to run around outside?
To have a colorful imagination?
For life to not be an unstable ride?
To not be tainted by those with selfish ambition?
When you’re five, are you still a kid?
Did you get to just have fun with friend?
When you’re six, is that not the start of your descend?
Not having to worry about meeting one’s end?
When you’re 8, does life still feel great?
Were you able to live outside constant fear?
When you’re 9, are you not held down by weight?
Never wanting to disappear?
When you’re 13, are you still able to smile?
Able to walk without guilt?
When you’re 14, can you still make life worthwhile?
Existing without feeling your world tilt?
How do I be a kid?
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pietroleopoldo · 3 months ago
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Can you believe that in a couple of days I am seeing my favourite musical being played in my country for the first time ever... Because I can't
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tomlinsun · 4 months ago
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x
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corpiote · 4 months ago
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everywhere I look.... chemistry is sneaking it's way into my other courses
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fragmentedblade · 8 months ago
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I think I've become an official HI3 player. I check the HSR leaks hoping for iterations of HI3 characters now
#I have little hope about some of them. For instance the Su and Kevin voice actors are taken by Aventurine and the Trailblazer iirc?#Kalpas' voice actor does the male Dreamseeker in Part 2 of HI3 which is not as terminal considering HSR is a different game but still#Luocha thankfully exists. I don't think they'll be introducing Kiana anytime soon#I would love Sakura but I'm way more into PE Sakura than CE Sakura and then there's what they did with Miko#Some of my favourite things of PE Sakura they gave to Jingliu or Acheron already (freeze time‚ haunted and corrupted by loss‚#unable to unsheathe a sword and memories coming back to her when she does‚#piercing someone's heart with her sword but the other person living on with a new life‚...)#Thus an iteration of all that but with the cool things missing could get messy and unsatisfactory pretty easily#Mobius and MEI are similar to Mei and Herta so they're in a similar situation to PE Sakura#I find Griseo somewhat unsettling in a good way and in a way same with Eden. I love all the loss weighing on her as if she had already dead#with the concept of her being The Era itself and the era dying. So I wouldn't mind seeing them too#Hua seems like she may appear in the Xianzhou? Given the Marshall existence and that the Xianzhou drinks a lot of those concepts#Blade‚ Dan Heng and Jingliu drink so much of Fu Hua. I don't care about Hua though. The Herrscher I did like though#I'm curious about what they'll do#Other than the Chinese voice actor having already a steady job in Mihoyo‚ there's echoes of Kalpas in Blade‚ Arlan and Sam#so I really don't have much hope there. Not as little as with Kevin and Su perhaps but... yeah not really a lot of hope#Yet here I am. Hopelessly hoping for a Kalpas iteration. Imagine how beautiful the fire would be *sigh*#I was so mad about him being my favourite in HI3 but it just makes sense#Besides the Guzm.a process he went me go through‚ he truly has a lot of themes going on that recall Blade. I don't know...#I like his CN voice actor a lot‚ and how he plays Kalpas in particular‚ both when he's calm and when he's deranged#The Dreamseeker doesn't have the same voice at all unfortunately. I would really love to see him in HSR what can I say#That's the kind of person I've become. In a little bit of time I'll be wanting a Kalpas plushie at this rate#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later
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yellowhollyhock · 2 months ago
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do you ever like. shut down from compliments
Like the exact same emotions that usually bring flapping hands and bouncy feet just kinda. Implode in your chest and leave you super checked out
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roxannepolice · 9 months ago
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Idk how to put that without sounding like a pretentious bitch that I am, but. Dealing with your trauma doesn't mean you'll become a glowing ray of sunshine or forget every unpleasant event in your life? Like, PTSD isn't when you know where to hide during a shooting, only when you have a panic attack over champagne bottle popping. Being able to answer a direct question about the traumatic event is a good sign. Looking into a pattern doesn't mean you're tRauMAtiSEd only that you've learned from past events.
All of this goes double for fictional characters. So. How about we stop acting like Fifteen is in the same mental place as Fourteen during his WBY meltdown?
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squidificati0n · 4 days ago
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Feeling so depressed today
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