#i am that which shall rebuild it

[venusaur-propaganda]

Drawing Venusaur with every Pokemon pt. Xerneas

[freckleslikestars]

Okay, someone please settle this argument I’m having with my dad:

Someone has hung a basket of their things (in this case face cloths and scrubbies) with those Command removable hook things (you use a double sided sticky thing and it gives a really strong hold) in the shared bathroom. Because you take longer and hotter than average showers, one of the hooks keeps falling off and so the basket falls down. Do you:

A) inform the person whose basket it is that it’s fallen down and the hook needs replacing, but other than removing the basket from the other hook so it doesn’t fall and damage the sink it’s over, do nothing else to interfere

B) inform the person that it’s fallen down and offer to rehang it if desired, but if you can’t remember how it was hung/don’t think you can do an appropriately satisfactory job at rehanging it, you don’t touch it and leave it to them

C) don’t say anything and rehang it incorrectly and wonkily, and then when the other person points out that you did it wrong and you should have just left it to them, kick off and insist that the other person is being ungrateful.

[shukraastro]

BTS Jungkook's D9 Navamsa Ascendant - Ashlesha Nakshatra

Since there is an ongoing dicussion in the community about his accurate birth time because he has mentioned his birth time on two occasions and in different ways, many people are confused about his D1 Ascendant which is very crucial for finding his D9 Ascendant. Therefore I have worked on this topic with my Army friend who helped me in getting to know Jungkook a bit more, since I myself am not really familiar with the personality traits of the BTS members. Big Thanks to my dear friend, for doing her best in understanding this Nakshatra and watching videos and researching about the Ashlesha Nakshatra with me together and comparing the traits with those of Jungkook.

So without further ado I will jump right into it. There is two birth times given, the first case is 3:23 PM which makes him a Mula Lagna in his Rasi chart and the second 3:25-30 PM which makes him a Purva Ashadha Lagna in his Rasi chart. In the case of Mula Rasi he becomes an Ashlesha Ascendant in his Navamsa and in the case of Purva Ashadha Rasi he becomes a Magha Ascendant, for 3:30 PM even a Purva Phalguni Ascendant. Yes, every 5 minutes gap can make such differences.

I have taken his traits and mannerizms under the scope with my friend and compared all those with the traits which are seen in Ashlesha Nakshatra natives. Now here is the thing, these will be the traits of him which he displays when he is with his loved ones, close friends, family, partner and when he is in his home environment because it is the Navamsa Ascendant. The Navamsa Ascendant shows how a person is deep down at their core and how they present this outwardly. And of course we can't see this part of his life completely. But as my friend told me, that he is someone who has shown this side of himself quite frequently in videos with his members and in his live streams, so this analysis is purely based on that.

Ashlesha Nakshatra Symbol: A coiled Serpent

Ashlesha Nakshatra Lord: Mercury

Ashlesha Nakshatra Deity: The Nagas

Anything Serpent related also holds Rahuvian energy, because Rahu itself is known as the Serpent's head and the Nagas as well as Rahu are linked to the Patala Lok which is the Underworld.

Common themes/traits seen in Ashlesha individuals:

1. They hug their loved ones very tighly like a snake coiling around someone, even when sleeping they coil themselves around their person. Very commonly seen in Jungkook's interaction with his members.

2. They are revengeful if someone does them wrong or harms their loved ones, just like a mother (cancerian trait) snake. Apparently he shall be very protective over his members.

3. They move their body in a very seductive way. Watching them move from point A to point B is very hynotizing, just like watching a snake moving forward. Their movements are very fluid and smooth. I guess this must be very self-explanatory.

4. They either take good care of their spine and their joints or they will deal with some sort of issues regarding the spine and joints. I was told to mention this one very specifically: Jungkook's roller cushion and his habit of cracking his joints and knuckles.

5. They have advanced sense of smell. Which again, this is supposed to be a well-known fact about him.

6. These people have some habits with their tongue, like sticking out or biting on their tongue or their tongue getting in the way when they're speaking, resulting in lisping, they also tend to stutter and stumble upon their words. There can sometimes be issues with the speaking ability which results from the Serpentine and Mercurian influence. These themes are commonly seen in Jungkook, lisping and stuttering as well as especially sticking out his tongue in a playful manner very often.

7. Moving homes frequently, as well as demolishing and rebuilding their home. This is a theme which results from the influences of the Cancer sign, which is the natural sign of the 4th house - the home - and the nature of the snake to shed its skin. Sometimes you'll see these people also not even living in an own house for some time, just the way how snakes seek shelters in other houses until they find themselves their very own shelter under some rock. There are articles published that Jungkook demolished a house to rebuild it again from scratch, so this theme shows itself here as well.

Which leads to to next point, when we're talking about the home...

8. Seeking privacy in the darkness. This is a very interesting one. Privacy and spending time in darkness or dimly lit spaces is a common theme in Ashlesha natives. Snakes seek shelter in cool, dark and secure places to digest their meal and rest. This typical behavior of snakes gives us further insight into the private life style of Ashlesha natives. Apparently it is also well known, by Jungkook's live streams that he enjoys to spend plenty of time at home in his privacy where he keeps his lights dimly litten and cooks, eats and rests.

9. Ashlesha natives are also very prone to jealousy and posessiveness. Now this does not have to be in a negative way also from individual to individual the intensity of this can differ. Nevertheless Jungkook has shown this side of himself in moments of interactions with his members as well as made it quite clear that he is the jealous type of partner - in the perilla leaf debate to be specific.

10. Ashlesha native's have a fascination with the other realms. This is an influence which results from the connection of the Nagas to the Underworld. This fascination leads them often to practicing rituals or anything of that kind. In another live stream Jungkook has openly spoken about his attempt to contact spirits in his house by using tools. There is the Mercurian theme of contacting/communication/using tools and the Cancer rising lord Moon in the 12th house of private/isolated place his home.

This was the last point, I'm sure he might also have more themes of Ashlesha which resonate with him but as far as publically shown these were the ones which we could discover in him.

He already carries traits of Magha and Purva Phalguni in him because of his other placements but the reason behind these Ashlesha traits in him must be the influence of his very possible Ashlesha Ascendant. He has no other Ashlesha placement in his other charts, so he must have an Ashlesha Lagna in his Navamsa. This would also explain why his clock tattoo points specifically at 3:23 o'clock which makes him an Ashlesha Ascendant in D9.

Again this was only for research and education purposes only. Also some of these observations are from Dr. Arjun Pai and his Team on Youtube and some of them are my own observations.

The above mentioned Ashlesha traits can also be applied in spouse analysis, if some of you happen to have Darakaraka/7th Lord/Venus/Jupiter/Mars in this Nakshatra.

I was not intending to make any Jungkook related posts for the upcoming weeks, but since I was working on this one with my friend for a while and we got done with it already I wanted to post it quickly and have this topic off the table.

I hope this was informative for y'all.

See you soon.🌺

[fatecantstopme]

Hi!!! Can I plzz request a Morpheus and y/n are married and reader just wants alone time with her husband but he's always busy so unsatisfied reader has some alone time and Morpheus hears and goes to help her (smut included plz) 🤧🤧

Need

Pairing: Morpheus x wife!reader

Summary: Morpheus has been extremely busy since returning from captivity. He never intended to, but he'd left you without his touch for far too long.

Warnings: Fluff. SMUT, oral (F receiving), unprotected sex (P in V)

A/N: I love this idea. Hope you enjoy! 🥰

It felt like it had been ages since you'd had any alone time with your husband. He'd been incredibly busy, so much so that you barely saw him these days. It wasn't that he was ignoring you, he was simply overwhelmed with work and he had the tendency to get completely lost in it.

As the Lord of Dreams, Morpheus was constantly busy managing his kingdom, creating new dreams and nightmares, and ensuring the comfort of his creations and the dreamers who entered his realm. Given his recent absence from the realm, his work had quadrupled. As such, he had been spending a lot of time in his study or out in the Dreaming.

You had to admit you missed him terribly. When he'd first returned from his captivity, you hadn't left each other's sides for weeks, but once he began to rebuild The Dreaming, he became more distant.

This evening in particular, you were feeling extra lonely--and perhaps a bit needy. You decided to take a walk through the palace, searching for your husband. Eventually, you wandered into his study and found him hunched over his desk, several books open in front of him.

He looked up as you entered, an expression of surprise on his beautiful face. "My love? Is everything alright?" he asked gently.

You smiled as you moved across the room. "I'm alright, darling. I just haven't seen much of you in a while."

Morpheus frowned. "I am sorry, beloved. I did not intend to ignore you."

"Oh, no, not at all. I didn't think you were ignoring me. You're just very busy and I completely understand. Your work is very important."

He stood up and stepped in front of his desk, arms reaching out to pull you towards him. "Nothing is more important than you," he said solemnly.

You smiled and leaned in to kiss him gently. "I appreciate that," you paused. "Do you think you'll be coming to bed tonight?"

Morpheus looked a little sad--perhaps even regretful. "I have much to do this evening, my darling. I shall endeavor to finish it in a timely manner, but I do not think it will be tonight."

You couldn't help the frown that graced your face, but you tried to hide the intensity of your sadness from your husband. "That's alright, Morpheus."

He could tell you were sad, but before he could say a word, one of his creations knocked on the open door. "Sire?"

Morpheus stepped away from you and turned his attention to the newcomer. "Yes?"

"There is a--situation that requires your assistance, my lord."

Morpheus sighed.

"It's alright, darling," you said softly. "Go take care of it."

He nodded. "I will be quick, my love."

You smiled at him before he rushed out of the room, after which you allowed your smile to fall. You sighed softly. You didn't want to be annoyed--it wasn't his fault he was so busy--but you were just so lonely.

You made your way slowly back to your bedroom. You took a hot bath before crawling into your bed. The bed was quite large, and so painfully empty.

You tossed back and forth for at least an hour, but you couldn't fall asleep. Eventually, you rolled onto your back with a dramatic sigh. Your body felt like it was on fire, your nerve endings alight with need.

You knew what you needed, but you didn't often have to take matters into your own hands--Morpheus was always ready and willing to satisfy your needs. Tonight, however, you needed a release and your husband was much too busy to help you.

You sighed as you sat up, tugging your nightgown off over your head. You laid back down and closed your eyes, trying desperately to imagine Morpheus's hands instead of your own. Your hands slid down your body towards where you needed them most.

The moment they settled between your legs, you released a soft sigh. As you began to move, your breathing became heavy and your soft moans filled the room. You sped up your ministrations, the volume of your moans increasing with the speed.

"Morpheus," you whispered softly, your imagination filling your mind with images of your husband.

On the other side of The Dreaming, Morpheus was finishing up his business when he suddenly heard your voice breaking through his concentration.

"(Y/N)?" he said as he looked up.

Soft moans carried across the breeze--your moans.

Morpheus froze, his body immediately wanting to respond to you, despite the fact he was not alone. He knew he likely wasn't going to be able to finish working, especially when he heard you call his name.

"I must go," he said abruptly.

"My lord?"

"My wife requires my immediate attention. I shall not be returning until tomorrow."

His creation simply nodded, but Morpheus didn't stay long enough to see it. He disappeared, instantly reappearing in his bedchamber. What he saw was enough for him to stop breathing.

You were completely naked on top of your shared bed, hands between your legs, body writhing as you pleasured yourself. Pretty moans floated across the room, turning Morpheus almost completely feral.

"Beloved," he said lowly, voice rough with desire.

Your eyes shot open and your hands instinctively flew to cover yourself as much as you could. When you saw Morpheus standing at the end of the bed looking at you like he was about to eat you alive, your hands lowered to your sides and you bit your lip.

"What do you think you are doing, my love?" he asked.

"I'm sorry, Morpheus--I just--I needed--I need you."

His eyes impossibly darkened, turning into a starless night sky. "You could have come to me, darling."

"You were busy...I didn't wanna bother you."

"Sweetheart," he whispered as he lowered himself onto the bed, body hovering above yours possessively. "You could never bother me."

Your lips parted and your breathing became heavy. "Morpheus..."

"Yes, my love?"

"Please..." you whimpered.

"Tell me what you need, my darling."

"I need you to touch me," you begged.

Morpheus smiled wolfishly. "Anything for you," he whispered as his clothing magically disappeared. His lips met yours in a hungry, possessive kiss, which you responded to instantly. You tangled your fingers into his thick, dark hair and moaned against his lips.

His soft hands caressed your skin and his lips began to trail down your neck, focusing on your most sensitive spot. His fingers glided down your body, stopping to collect the moisture pooling in your core.

He separated from you, bringing his fingers to his lips to taste you, a soft groan of satisfaction leaving his mouth.

"Please," you whispered. "Don't tease me."

Morpheus smiled. "As you wish, my darling."

He wasted no time in lowering himself between your legs, lips immediately attaching themselves to your core. When his tongue snaked out to caress you, a broken moan slipped past your lips.

Every time with Morpheus was incredible. It was to be expected from an Endless, but you couldn't deny his sheer talent. You weren't sure if he used magic or if he was simply that good; either way, you were thankful.

"Morpheus," you murmured, his name both a prayer and a plea.

Somehow he always seemed to know exactly what you wanted and needed, and this moment was no different. His tongue danced across you, fingers gently coaxing you towards your climax.

You moaned loudly enough for all The Dreaming to hear when your orgasm washed over you, but those moans were practically whispers in comparison to the sounds the Dream Lord would tear from your throat this night.

Morpheus did not stop his actions, did not allow you even a moment to catch your breath. He brought you to climax again and again and again, before he finally acquiesced to your pleas for a pause.

"I have left you alone for far too long, my love," he murmured into your ear. His soft hands caressed your form, gently massaging your skin, the touch a comforting gesture. "It is my honor to make it up to you."

"I think..." you gasped out breathlessly, "...you have."

Morpheus chuckled darkly. "Oh no, beloved. I have only just begun."

Your eyes widened as you gazed into his handsome face. "You can't...be serious."

He offered you a pleased smirk. "Oh, but I am, my darling. I fully intend to have you writhing beneath me for the rest of the night. I wish to hear nothing but the sweet sounds coming from your lips. All the mortals visiting The Dreaming this night will have the most pleasant dreams indeed."

You stared up at him, completely breathless, utterly spent, and yet so entirely his. His fiery gaze and his passionate words lit a spark inside of you only his touch could put out.

You touched his face almost reverently as you whispered, "Please, Morpheus." Your meaning was quite clear: you wanted nothing more than the promise of endless pleasure, pleasure only he could give you.

His fingers intertwined with yours and he pulled your hands above your head, holding them in place with one arm. He entered you swiftly, giving you no time to prepare or adjust, before setting a brutal pace. There was nothing cruel about his actions...it was pure passion in its rawest and truest form.

Morpheus was true to his word, as he always was. He pleasured your body all throughout the night, bringing you a pleasure so intense it would have incapacitated a lesser being. His own pleasure was derived from seeing you like this, from hearing you scream his name, feeling you clench around him so tightly he couldn't breathe.

He whispered sweet nothings against your skin, marking the supple flesh with his deep, endless love. His body was never apart from yours for more than an instant all throughout the night.

When the sun began to rise, Morpheus finally allowed you to rest. He held your spent body against him, the warmth of your skin a comfort to him. You had long since fallen asleep, but he did not dare move. He couldn't bear the thought of waking you or leaving your side, duties be damned.

So there he lay, the King of Dreams, holding his lover tightly in his arms, protecting her and loving her with all he had to give from his Endless soul.

[intotyun]

Analysis on aizen's goals and motivations + why he actually lost

Since bleach cour 3 is coming out so much later, I thought I should do an analysis on aizen, mainly focusing on his goals and motivations.

So one thing that is made abundantly clear is that aizen's whole reason for going to war with the gotei 13:

1. Change the world that is built on treachery and lies

2. By overthrowing the soul King and become God itself so he can rebuilt it in his image.

“That's an argument only a loser would make! A victor should speak on how the world should be, rather than how it currently operates. I refuse to accept the world ruled by that thing! I am a victor, I shall decide how the world should be! ”

Don't think I have to do a word for word analysis on what Aizen meant here. But what's interesting is how aizen referred to the “soul king” as THAT thing, as if his disgusted and we all know from cfyow how the soul king was betrayed and mutilated by the 5 nobles and used as some linchpin because they were terrified of his power. The 5 nobles then went on the rebuild the world in their image. And when they “rebuild it in their image”, they were actually rebuilding a world that would benefit ONLY them.

And we see how this image they built turned out: the current soul society.

Soul Society is a very shitty place to live in if I'm being honest, and I'm pretty sure someone as smart as Aizen would have noticed this. I always headcanon him as someone who lived in the Rukongai District, so he would naturally see first hand on how the world operates.

Aizen does not have a backstory, but I'm certain that something tragic must have happened in his past for him to be SO motivated to change this world. I'm sure Aizen did not suddenly want to become a God when he was first born (as funny that would be). He took on that role because

1. He had the power to do so and

2. No one wanted to

Aizen's "loser" speech was directed to Kisuke telling him how he despised him for not taking action despite his intellect. Which is why I think Aizen isn't really a egotistical man per say who wants to overthrow God because he believes he is superior. If God was doing his job and making life after death a “true paradise” instead of “a hell hole”, Aizen would have never tried overthrowing him.

And this is also why I don't think Aizen would have mind if someone else such as Kisuke became the soul king. Just as long, they had the intellect and power to change this horrible world. But since no one could see what he can see, Aizen took on the manter to change the world as he had the power and intellect to do so.

Now we all know what aizen's main goal and motivation was: to change this stagnant and shitty world that only existed to benefit the 5 nobles.

Now we move into another goal and desire that is a bit personal. Something that was locked away in Aizen's heart. Something that can only be found if you are on equal footing with him and can feel his sword.

the goal to find an equal.

this was stated clearly by Ichigo when he said, “perhaps he has been searching all this time for someone to regard as his equal” now I don't think kubo would dedicate 2 pages of Ichigo talking about Aizen's loneliness just for it to be simply “Ichigo assumption” I think this was Kubo's way of telling us readers this was how Aizen was truely feeling deep down.

Now, what exactly did Ichigo meant by equal? Did he mean in terms of strength? Well, we have yamamoto for that. How about in terms of intellect? Kisuke has the same kind of knowledge Aizen has. How about a combination? Is there actually anyone who is both smart and strong? nope it's just Aizen.

Then why do people say Ichigo was the only one who Aizen regarded as an equal? Ichigo definitely does not see eye to eye with Aizen's idealogy. Ichigo is strong yes, but that can't be the only thing considered to be “Aizen's equal”.

What is considered being “Aizen's equal” is the ability to understand him as a person and also understand the burden of his strength (really reminds me of gojo)

But you see, at the end of the day, Aizen has not find that equal. Ichigo is not that equal, he can never understand Aizen. He has no idea of his past and had no idea of what exactly pushed him to the edge. He can only understand more aspects of him than the other soul repears. And that is just very.... depressing. I truly think the only reason why Ichigo prolonged that battle, was so he could understand Aizen more. But he gave up when Aizen kept evolving and remembered why he came here.

Why did Aizen actually lose?

First let's mention about the traitor trio relationship.

First we have Tosen, the one Aizen killed.

Toswn served Aizen even before he became a shinigami. He saw the corruption of the Soul Society and believed that Aizen is the only one who can remake it to a better world. But where is he now? Oh that's right, gone.

In cfyow vol 3, page 370-375, the author described aizen and tosen relationship as “close” very bold choice of words given the fact we barely see Aizen being “close” to anyone. But this is backup with evidence:

1. Aizen able to sense the soul of Kaname vanishing, and then the author went on to say, "the soul of the man with whom he shared a destined relationship with; the man who was his confident"

2. Aizen respecting Tosen's wish to be killed if he ever started to accept the world of the shinigamis

3. Aizen telling himself, “sometimes, fear is necessary for evolution” when Tosen asked aizen to kill him.

I think Aizen truly did care for Kaname in his own way and not just use him as a means/tool. He formed a genuine bond with him though I wouldn't go to an extend and say he was an equal. As the only thing he saw eye to eye with Aizen was the state of the world.

And next, we have Gin the one who betrayed him. I believe Aizen knew deep down Gin was going to betray him but kept him around out of curiosity, and he wasn't bullshiting his way. But what I want to talk about is this panel of aizen after killing Gin and seeing everyone around him suffering. He looks... sad???

But why? Does that mean deep down in his heart, Aizen cared for Gin? I mean looking back Gin was a child prodigy something Aizen could probably relate to (as Aizen was also born with exceptional talent and strength)

I think this is the moment where Aizen was slowly beginning to have the desire to lose. He lost thr espada and the only 2 confidents he somewhat cared for. He truely has to stand above the heavens alone. But Ichigo pulled up and obviously Aizen has to put on the facade of “i'm stronger than you”

now, let's move on to the fight

“Let's do this Aizen real quick. It will be over”

But then, when they clash swords, he feels Aizen's sword and the loneliness coming out from it, it probably made Ichigo curious. This was not the Aizen he faced before, the Aizen he faced was confident and showed no signs of "loneliness".

Ichigo says this but goes on to prolongs the battle and keeps asking Aizen a bunch of questions. You can see it as Ichigo flexing on Aizen but I think Ichigo truely wanted to end this battle quick by all means necessary.

This isn't Ichigo flexing, this is Ichigo trying to understand Aizen. But I guess since he spend so much time in the dangai, he probably cannot properly ask aizen like how he would normally do in his battles.

Asking him questions that Aizen asked him before as he thinks this Aizen would be feeling the same thing ichigo did when he first faced aizen. Trying to relate to him and overpower him to tell Aizen, “hey i'm stronger than you, you arent the only one with overwhelming strength in this world”. Trying to relate to Aizen.

Obviously, this doesn't work, and Aizen gets angry and transforms into monster aizen.

Ichigo is confused and looks so sad, his probably thinking, "I don't get it. Why is he doing this? Doesn't he hate his strength? Shouldn't he feel better knowing that there is someone else as strong as him? Dosent he want to lose?"

“I see, so you cannot allow it, hogyoku. You can't forgive me...”

this was the beginning of Aizen's downfall: relying too much on the hogyoku. Aizen talks to the hogyoku as if a shinigami talks to its zanpakuto. The more he bonded with it, the more the hogyoku forged a relationship with him and read deeper into his heart.

Monster Aizen managed to damage Ichigo and I guess since he realised that lives were at stake here, he gives up trying to understand Aizen and ends it. You can see the look Ichigo gives to Aizen's “dead” body and his reaction when he found out he was still alive.

“Hogyoku has determined I no longer need a Zanpakuto!”

Once again, Aizen relies on the Hogyoku rather than his own zanpakuto. His zanpakuto is not disappearing because he has become more powerful. it's because he himself has replaced it with a new weapon.

And once that was done, the Hogyoku managed to bond with Aizen more, and it read deeper into his heart and ultimately saw what his true desire was. The desire to be normal so he can relate to others. So the Hogyoku granted Aizen his wish.

In the end, Aizen lost because he himself does not understand what he truely wants: to be a god or to connect with others. In contrast to Ichigo who has fully accepted himself.

*btw I believe aizen did lose his zanpakuto here, but during the events before tybw, well he did alot of reflection with himself and his zanpakuto spirit and thus, he got back his powers which is probably why he didn't know who yhwach was seeing when he was fighting him

TYBW

In tybw we see Aizen back again, even more stronger than before as stated by urahara and it also seems he has kyoka suigetsu's power back again.

And from what we can tell, Aizen is back to his normal "arrogant" self with a little twist. Starting with his interaction with yhwach.

Aizen pokes fun at yhwach for “having more trouble with kurosaki Ichigo” then he had forseen. But Yhwach refutes back at him and tells Aizen, “not to project his insecurities onto me” (lmao yhwach) but funny enough, Aizen dosen't even try and talk back. He instead ignores him and tells yhwach he plans to stop him.

“so you see me as Ichigo Kurosaki? Fascinating...”

another moment where the old aizen wouldn't have done: using himself as a shield/sacrifice to help to defeat the enemy. I guess yhwach was right, “to join forces when confronted by a common enemy, is this not the actions of those cowards you detest so much?”

Not only that, aizen was trusting the fact that ichigo could figure out that he activated kyoka suigetsu to deliver the blow to Ichigo. A complete contradiction on his statement on “trust is the same thing as reliance”

People always see that moment as a badass moment, but personally this was when I knew tybw aizen was not the same aizen as before.

This is probably why Aizen was getting stronger, he is not scheming anything anymore, and thus has no choice but to do a reflection on himself and has to come to terms with his conflicting desires. The more he understands himself, the more stronger he would become.

And lastly, we have iconic panel of Aizen speech on courage.

There is nobody in bleach that embodies the word "courage" more then Ichigo. He experienced all kind of defeats which shaped him as a person. Even when he was faced with a stronger opponent, never once did he back out and instead he pushed forward and conquered his fear.

Something Aizen was not capable of. Aizen was afraid of his own conflicting desires that lies within deep in his heart. Because he thinks that part of him wont help accomplish what he set out to do and thus, refused to acknowledge that other part of him.

But Ichigo instead accepted both the quicy and Hollow parts as Zangestu. Both who are also conflicting parts of him.

Aizen is definitely returning in the hell arc, szyal stating that the reason why the gates of hell were shut was because of the immense spitrual pressure of aizen. The gotei 13 will have to come to terms that despite how shitty aizen is, they can not deny he is STRONG. And will have no choice but to ask him for his strength. I would really be vv interesting to see how aizen would play out and his role.

[bronx-bomber87]

Hello lovely fandom! It’s tiiimmeeeee. I’m so ready for this premiere. This hiatus felt like the longest one yet. Probably cause they weren’t allowed to share literally anything for months and months. While I might still gripe we’re only getting 18 and 20 would’ve been better….I am psyched to be analyzing a new season ❤️

Changing these up to First impressions cause mini and I don’t get along in terms of brevity. Now imma try and be briefer since I’ll be doing a deep dive next summer. Hopefully in our next hiatus. *fingers crossed* The library still a turd for new gifs. So had to make all mine. Also I must have a new angle at my new place. So they came out not how I wanted lol But after a full day of work I was too tired to re-do them all. It's a miracle this is coming out with how tired I am haha Anyways bear with me and hopefully next weeks gifs are better ha Off we go!

7x01 The Shot.

Cool thanks recap. Not like we forgot the breakup that ruined us all…Would like to say someday that won't ruin me to watch, but that's a lie...Love that to leave the lineup for recaps now. Thanks.

It's the little things like them sitting next to each other in the swat car that make me so happy. Not gonna lie I was grinning like a damn fool just seeing them seated together. God I missed them. Straight giddy them working together in the field. It’s where they originated. It’s where they’re going to heal.

I love her directing him in the field. That snap of her fingers and he knows instantly what she needs and follows. That beautiful rhythm only they can achieve. Silent communication at it's finest folks. Mmm loving this. Lucy taking down a dude double her size and Tim coming in to help finish him off. Hot damn I love them in the field. Legit ship crack to me everyone. Look at those beautiful humans in motion above. I can't get enough.

Oooh lord T.O Tim *fans self* Mmm Can’t say haven’t missed him. I'll be real honest. Yum. Thank you Nolan for not undermining him while he sized them up. We would've had words sir. It probably shouldn't delight me watching him tear them apart, and yet here we are with me drooling over him. With zero regrets. Just nice to see him in his element after being knocked out of it last year. I shall enjoy this year for him I can already tell.

Ha! Bingo card hit. That's one square down. ‘Grey guides Lucy with her career.’ Yasss I’m a dork I know but you all knew this ha Grey pulling strings to get her to T.O. "Temp." I’m sure it’ll stick. He see’s what a good teacher and leader she is. Look at him jumping starting this for her. Nudging her in the right direction.

Lucy not being sure....Still battling with that UC identity and detective path. Some left over S6 bleh hanging around. I think Grey is setting her path and she has no idea how ‘not temporary’ this will be. At least IMO. I see her excelling at this and wanting to stay at it. Plus like Grey said it’ll strengthen her position should detective come back up. Also like to list the reasons why I think this will be good for her.

One it'll rebuild her confidence. Something we all know was shattered and then run over by s6. Second it'll give her a new purpose and clarity for her career. (Which is also a bingo square for me. Yes I'll be tallying mine all year lol) Now she has to accept being a FT one for it to apply but I think it will. Lastly it'll get rid of the pesky 'Chain of Command' issue for them later on. Because we don't want that again.

Tim enters the chat and he is a most welcome addition. The mini banter about her training. I'm here for it and I love love love it. Look at the flirty smirks on these idiots. Like breathing fresh air once again. The small smirks have me reeling. Gimme. Grey although has no time for this LOL Ushering their asses out. Just happy they can breathe the same air again and not have it be nuclear.

Then the real banter begins. I’ve missed them so much. I wanna cry. Tim instantly offering to give her tips. Is this one of his small doses? Possibly I think he would’ve offered this as an olive branch either way tbh. But I love seeing how eager he is to bond with her over this. Lucy’s so cute with her ‘ My rookie.’ Girl you’re gonna wanna stay a T.O. I already see it.

Lucy of course has her sassy answer locked and loaded for him. He answers right back. Goodness their banter is top tier. And woo another bingo card for me. Well this was not in my official bingo card. BUT I did say how if she ended up as a T.O. this season this would happen. In my 6x08 review said they would end up doing a bet over who trains a better rookie. And here we are. I'm enjoying my spoils and grinning like a happy fool. Which is nice after spending the second half of s6 being emotionally spent and destroyed.

Oh Lucy, like you could ever walk way from your man about a competitive bet of all things. This is how they’re gonna heal my friends. Going back to the beginning. To their roots. Where this rock solid bond was started. In the field. Along with some banter and fiery competition thrown in. This new dynamic has me so giddy I can’t even contain myself.

You can see how excited Tim is she’s going to be a T.O. With him. Flirting with her by offering this up. Moth to a flame with her in general. But this? Man is raring to go. Being a T.O and competition with his girl? He is beaming with excitement. Also probably knows this is a good way to further his cause of mending fences.

The goading of her oh my lord. It’s s4 all over again and I’m here for it. Except Tim is far more aware he’s in love with this woman. The straight teasing and flirting in front of the entire station. Welcome back. Oh my word I love sfm. His telling smirk is amazing. Reeling her back in slowly LOL

Nolan actually ignites more flirty flirts for them when he tells them about the ringer. Because classic John can't shut his yapper. I’ve truly missed this high grade goodness though. Lucy accusing him of hustling her haha Tim deescalates her like only he can with his strong logic. Saying it's actually harder that he has previous experience. He’s not wrong. First thing I thought about him when they said he had experience…Poor Seth called a virgin lmao

The rookies get assigned and we get jealous/protective Tim. Welcome back to our screens. You've been missed. *grabs ice water* This premiere is trying to kill me in the best way. I was here for the show. You tell that cocky little boy babe. I think someone else had one of the rookies flirts with Lucy in their bingo card. So you get that square ha The balls to do that in front of Tim. This kid has a death wish on wheels.

Ovary explosion at the way he barked at him though. Man is making me thirsty af. Also this kid is not a ringer in the least. I know what it’s like to de-program someone. It’s not easy. When I would get someone from another team (and terrible manager btw) I would spend the first 30 days just getting rid of the bad habits before I could begin to mold them. So ringer he is not....Lucy has a better shot with fresh meat tbh. Seth is far more impressionable. Hence her finishing line above.

Tim TEARS Texas a new one. Was kind of hoping he would. Nothing like a solid Tim T.O. rant. This kid needed it holy cow. Too damn cocky for a rookie even with experience. Makes it worse. Get em Tim! I’m enjoying this far too much. Haha Mmm. Sidelines his ass as he should. Maybe he can rejoin when his ego is in check.

This scene had me cackling. First off look at them both with crossed arms. I'm dying. Also Lying liars who lie LOL Both struggling a little bit with their rookies. It’s hilarious. Can’t ever admit fault of course. Very s4 vibes going on here I love it sfm.

Friggin Nolan has to be include himself...Listen John they checked the guest list for this work flirt convo. You're not on it sir. So needy this one. He actually didn't bug me much at all in this one. Probably the lack of Bailey....

Tim’s final T.O scene has me drooling holy hell. The jacket, the stern taking to, and telling them to suck less? I’m dying hahaha I loved how this was shot. Seeing the faces as Tim grills them both. Putting them in place. I love it sfm I'm so VERY excited for this season for him. If this was our look into it I am ready for more.

Oh my word, this final scene of theirs. If you don’t feel giddy, and a sense of promise for reconciliation from this interaction, I can't help you. LOL. I mean that in the nicest way haha I really do. The subtext running through this scene like a bullet train of hope. The moment begins with puppy dog Tim. Let’s take a second to contrast how he just was with the rookies earlier. To seeing his girl in the parking lot. That's the Lucy Chen effect.

That man is walking on air, and beaming his best ‘Lucy’ smile as he approaches her car, looking like a damn snack I wanna devour. I adore the swapping of stories. Giving each other shit but staying confident in their abilities to right their rookies ships as it were. Lucy saying ‘Tomorrow is another day.’ With Tim’s hopeful ‘Yes it is.’ Got me all in my damn feels. To me it’s a positive setup for the entire season. The low key flirty vibes here are glorious first and foremost. Second the flirting inside the promise with those two lines has me reeling.

The smiles they both convey just shows our babies are healing. Lucy is healing. She isn’t holding back with the positivity and flirting right back. There is this underlying UST too. But the most beautiful part is their talk about 'Tomorrow'. Tomorrow is another day for them to get one step closer to being who they once were. Only stronger. Tim’s 'Yes it is.' Is everything. His tone of voice, how he’s looking at her, and that determination to make something out of every day he gets with her. Driven to make tomorrow a day he inches one step closer to the promise he made in the elevator in 6x10. Oooh lord I’m excited for this season.

I said couple days ago how amped I was for this new dynamic. Them being T.O’s together and finding their way back in this fashion. It’s a fantastic and true to them way to do it. Couldn’t be more excited. The LOOKS everyone my god. The way he is pining after her. Doesn’t tear eyes away for a second as she pulls off. And our girl checks the mirror not once but TWICE.

Making eyes right back at him. This scene should excite the hell out of you. I’m scaling the walls right now haha This is as a very very promising opening episode for them. Little more proof they're going to make their way back. Won't be right away but it's coming. This is what I was longing for when we left off all those months ago.

For them to be in a better place to even start this healing. I’m so ready for this journey. I really am. Trusting the writers to do this at the right pace. So when it does happen and it will. We’re gonna be on cloud 9 x1000 Ooof lord that was good. They know how to close out an ep our ship. Watched promo for next ep. I’m vibrating with excitement.

The UST I feel from that little clip is the beauty of Eric and Melissa. This season gonna be incredible i feel it deep in my soul baha Now I’m excited we don’t have a break now that we’re here. As always thank you thank you thank you. To any and all who comments(love me to chat don’t be shy wanna theorize with you all) , like or reblog these. You have no idea how much it means to me. Also proud of myself for keeping this brief ish for me lol Below is my side notes feel free to comment on anything said in this or below till next week my lovely fandom :)

~~

Side notes non Chenford

No Bailey in a the premiere was already staring off with a win for me. Sorry Jenna but ya know lol sorta not….really…

Lieutenant Grey! So happy for him. Solid reasoning why he got it. Sucks he feels bad but I'm glad for him.

Lots of action off the bat hot damn. They said we'd have more and I loved it

Oooh loving Wes being assumed to the station. Welcome sir. Happy to have you and more Wopez moments to come.

Aaron went to north Hollywood someone had to lol Makes sense he would leave due to Blair. Also leaves the door open for him to return someday. Which makes my heart happy.

Poor Wes has to hear the recording of a man wanting to do things to his wife lol oh my lord. He’s legit having a meltdown about it hahah I sense some trouble for Wopez. Should be interesting season for them.

[thesharktanksdriver]

any way the wind blows (Platonic)

So I kinda watch records of ragnarok and became obsessed

This is platonic but later on I might make some romantic scenarios for a few characters

Y/n is based off of scaramouche fron genshin if he didn’t have mommy issues and was a decent person. Also left it gender neutral

Gods and humans had always been divide since the dawn of their creation

Molded from clay in their likeness yet considered inferior for their mortality

Despite the fact their creators were just as flawed (if not more) than they are

This was a reality that few knew or acknowledged, but one that Hephaestus had come to as he pondered one day in his lab

It was no secret he was hated by the others

For he is everything a god isn’t supposed to be

Their supposed to be beautiful and angelic yet he is ugly and deformed

Thrown from Olympus and experienced humans first hand before clawing his way back to his spot in the heavens

Given the most beautiful wife of them all who hates and despises his despite how hard he tries

He is scorned for simply existing just as humans are

Perhaps that’s why he finds better company in them than he does with his fellow gods

Though they are flawed beings they know that are not perfect

They embrace their flaws, and persevere despite how hard they are thrown down

They invent, create, destroy and rebuild again and again

Something in which the god of blacksmithing respects, for even the strongest blade can be melted down to create something even better

In his loneliness in his lab, deep within the smouldering smoke and bubbling magma of his volcanic home

Hephaestus longs to learn, to see, to hear but knows he cannot go to the surface world

So instead he decides to do what he does best

He decided to create his own human, one that would be imbued with the blessing of true immortality

For only something with a soul can be reaped, even gods face that fate if they are wounded enough

But if something doesn’t it will last forever

Hephaestus creates his magnum opus

His human

His child

“From finest clay your are molded, but within your veins lay no blood nor Ichor, but instead pure energy shall power you.”

You are created by his scarred and broken hands that are steady and firm

He makes you an epitome of beauty, something that he wishes he could be

For only something that is considered ugly can know what true beauty looks like

When your body is complete he imbues you with life through the lightning of Zeus

And then he lets the breath of zephyrs wind wake you

Through pure eyes you awaken and he helps you walk

Your like a newborn deer, shaking and buckling legs as you lean to him for help

You look at him with such kindness and innocence

And love

That one thing he had only wanted in his life from anyone

For the next couple of months he’s raises you, teaches you his craft and how to adapt

He is gentle but stern in his teachings, guiding yours hands and teaching you what he knows

Luckily your blessed by him to understand all languages and speak them as well

But despite spending months raising you he had not given you a name

Only calling you “my child”

When you ask of him why he hadn’t bestowed upon you a title he says he want you to decide

For you are worthy of picking it yourself when the time is right

For a long time you ponder

What shall that be

But it isn’t until he tells you to travel, to learn, to live and love like all humans that you decide your name

“And so you become a wanderer. Just know my child that if you ever need help I am at your call. My only advice is that humanity can be fickle but the gods are worse”

And so you begin your travels, through marshes and hills, or mountains to deserts

Through the valleys and into land that is lush in greenery of various kinds

From dusk to dawn you travel, stopping sporadically to stay in places that interest you, with people whom teach you before you leave for the road

It is a cycle

One that teaches you of humanity’s greed, pride, jealousy, rage, hate and despair

But one that also teaches you of their compassion, love, kindness, strength and their passion for surviving despite how the gods strike them down over and over again

They rebuild, they overcome and engineer a solution

For they only have themselves to rely on as the gods turned their backs to them

They adapt just as you do

But you are fundamentally different from them

An immortal being without a soul, one that looks and acts just as they do but retains thousands of years of knowledge you’d collected through experience

You aren’t a god but you aren’t quite human, yet you retain qualities from both

You are in between them but also something entirely different from either

You are you

And perhaps that is enough

“You and I have crossed paths, but our journeys will eventually diverge. Who knows what will happen next? Let's just wait and see.”

You end up meeting many humans (and some gods) in your journey’s but many stand out in your mind

One being the human who later would go onto become a demigod

Heracles who you knew as Alcides is someone you had met by complete accident when he was young

He was being bullied, pushed around and punched by children yet he still tried to put up a fight

He kept pushing on and standing up no matter how many times he was thrown down

You stepped in, sending the children running back scared whilst he gave you a toothy smile

Despite losing and being beaten down he was still optimistic

As you patched up the young boy he explained that those boys had been bullying him and his friends castor

That he never won against them but wouldn’t let them keep hurting his friend

It wasn’t righteous and he couldn’t stand for it

You can’t help but smile as he explains this, he was someone you’d only meet once in a blue moon

So you decide to offer him help

For the next couple of months you help the young boy train just as your father taught you

At first he fails

And fails some more

But he always returns to training no matter how beat down and tired he is

In his training your stern but encouraging

Teaching him to hone his strength and use it properly

It is then he begins to make progress

You show him how to stand up for the weak and to never waver in his righteousness

When you aren’t training him you spend time with him and Castor in Thebes

You buy them proper food and give some extra drachma to take home

They always feel a bit guilty about it but you assure them it’s no worry

You had plenty more (no, literally you had more money than you could spend from being a damn good blacksmith)

Figs are eaten as the three of you watch the sunset along with some honey drizzled fruit

They look up to you like a older sibling and it’s safe to say you view them as little brothers

But eventually as always you must eventually leave

Both are upset (especially Alcides) but on the night before you leave you take them to watch the sunset and stars once again

Eating ripe pomegranates as you explain each constellation that lights up the skies

“There is no need to be sad you two, perhaps we will meet again one day. Even if we don’t I will always be with you in memory and in what I taught. Just look to the stars and remember my stories”

That morning you leave but not before telling Alcides to keep up his training and to keep doing what he believes is right

You leave on horseback throwing to him a bag of coin with a sly smile

It’s many years later that you learn he became a god

A bit of pride swelling up in you along with worry

You can only hope he retained a bit of his love for humanity when he ascended to the heavens

another interesting human you meet is Qin Shi Huang

The first emperor of China with you as his personal Historian

The supposed cursed prince who was able to unite a shattered land under his power

Unlike others who still looked at hims with some semblance of hate or fear you always kept a small smile

Offering the knowledge he seeked with a certain something in your voice as you recounted tales of old

After a certain time he begins coming to you more, wanting to learn more

(Also using it as a way to get to know you. A mysterious traveler that somehow was so knowledgeable that despite being a foreigner ended up in court life)

You are outcasted much like he was when he was a child yet like him you bear it with a smile

When you talk with him the conversations start our formal

But in time he opens up as do you

Not about everything of course but about some of your travels and the sights you’d seen

From far spanning mountains that scraped the clouds to the green fields filled with wheat that made them look like fields of gold

He ends up wrapped up in those stories

At some point he’d come to call you friend

The only person after Chun Yan whom he’d let close to his heart

To see how he actually felt when he hadn’t locked it all behind a smile

As you get close to him rumours spread and it leads to you being harassed by several jealous court members

You don’t say anything, it’s not like it actually affects you anyways but when he learns

He is furious

It hurts him to know you were harmed because of him

That you were hated

Just like he was for actions that were not his own

But you brush it off simply telling him to give them a small punishment but nothing extreme

That in the end your alright and that you can’t really be mad at them

In their eyes your a foreigner who was in a position they could only dream about

It’s expected they’d get mad, maybe trying to drop a vase on your head was a bit much but in the end it didn’t hurt you

He reluctantly follows what you say but remains hesitant to let their actions go

Not long after this he tells you of his childhood, all the pain and loss

But how in the end he killed a god and united the land

There’s something in you that sparks at the “killing a god” part but he doesn’t ponder on it long

Instead the two of you talk

And for the first time you feel close enough to open up about not being human nor god

His ego probably gets a bit bigger when you causally mention that he’d likely go down in history

For your time as his historian he shows you in a lot of luxurious befit for royalty and high class nobles

Even years later you keep them, gifts you’d treasure for the rest of eternity and make sure to keep safe

He was born and bred in brutality so his rather violent ways aren’t much of a surprise but you try to help him find ways to temper it

To see that there are peaceful ways to end a fight

Around 4 years of staying there you know it’s about time to leave and Qin Shi isn’t very happy about it

He tells you as emperor that you couldn’t just leave

That as his historian you couldn’t up and go

As his only true friend

But those orders soon become pleads

And the authority in his voice drained as tears replaced it

During the month before you go he is at your side

Making new memories and silently dreading as hours and days fly by

He listens to more of your stories, to your personal accounts and how they differ to what’s told

And on that last day when the moon is full and you await a horse to take you on your next endeavour he stands by your side

And when the times comes for you to go he gifts you a bracelet commissioned just for you

He gently fastens it to your wrist

“A gift from me, a silent sign that you are forever the friend of the emperor”

“May our paths cross in the future my friend”

“Yes, let’s hope they do”

When he dies on a tour of his land at age 49 you somehow appear before his side as if sensing he was dying

His advisors are confused as he orders them to let you in but they do so in fear of the consequences

You might not agree with many of his actions you’d heard he committed but he was your friend

He passes holding your hand

The bracelet he once gave you is still worn to this day

He only wished he achieved immortality so you never had to deal with loosing yet another friend

But he is human and nothing can change that despite how you and he wish so

If you had a nickel for every time you ran into a human turned god you’d have two nickels

Weird it happened twice but your not complaining

You met Gautama Siddhartha the former prince of Kapilavastu as you took shelter beneath a tree when night fell

There you found him beneath the Bodhi tree that you took shelter beneath in a deep state of meditation

Until you politely asked if he was ok and he answered you

Compared to most you met Gautama is relaxed

He is in-tune with both himself and the world around him in more ways than he knows

You could already tell he was a legends in the making and decided to stick around for a bit to see where his journey would take him

Eventually as he reached enlightenment you grew curious as to why he remained on earth despite being able to go to the heavens above

But he tells you that his word isn’t done, that he wanted to spread what he had learned

To make people happy and to ease their suffering

It makes you happy

Never had you thought a god would do so but you assumed that because he was human before

That’s possibly why he still cared

Even years later when he does eventually go to the heavens you have a small Buddha statue in your possession of many items

As a way to honour him

You wouldn’t exactly call him friend (you didn’t know him long enough to do so though he’d disagree) but he is someone you’d certainly never forget

Raiden Tameemon is another you met curiosity enough at one of his Sumo matches

At the time you heard talk of a seemingly legendary fighter who had yet to lose a match and you wanted to check it out

You weren’t disappointed and began going to show up in the crowds who watched him

His strength was certainly admirable but so was his kindness in donating money back to his home town

So after a match you approached him and went with him for celebratory Sake

You kinda after that became drinking buds with him since other sumo wrestles didn’t seem keen on being around him

He is a lovely fellow one who you swear can eat a mountains worth of food and drink an oceans worth a anything

You on the overhand are technically the same m, you don’t need food or drink to survive you just have it to experience it’s taste and experience

He flirts with you quite a bit but you laugh it off

Taking them as compliments as you comment on his strength

His laugh is loud and boisterous as you both guzzle down more booze

You don’t really get drunk?, so your always the sober one who makes sure to get him home

To a normal person he’d be quite heavy but your able to carry him with no problem

Which gets quite a log of amazed onlookers as you carry him without so much as sweating

At his wrestling matches you’d always at the front of the crowd cheering for him

You know he won’t be defeated but you encourage him anyways

At some point he definitely uses your hat as a makeshift Frisbee despite you yelling at him

Sometimes during his drunken ramblings he talks of how he feels like a monster

You always assure him though that he is not

That he’s a man like everyone else

One who deserves love just like everyone does

It’s a rare moment but hearing that from you makes him cry a little

Perhaps he had waited a long time to hear that

He knows beforehand that you’d have to leave one day but when you do he says goodbye with a smile

He gives you a hug and pats your back with a blinding grin

You promise to catch another of his fights one day and you do

The last one before his retirement is spent with him drinking with you like for old times sake

Slurred singing and messy dancing as you and him walk side by side of the busy street as the moon is risen in the sky

He teaches you to laugh and enjoy a drink when times are rough

Every year though on the date of his death you honour him by having a sip of sake whilst watching the moon

For the moon had is the only remaining witness to those nights filled with laughter

Mr. Anonymous otherwise know as Jack (though your not sure that’s even his real name) finds you on his own

At the time you were briefly stopping off in Britain to check out the Industrial Revolution

So far it’s been disappointing to you and slightly disturbing as you’d seen young children be put on the workforce

Having to deal with hazardous materials and operate machinery that could rip them apart

Oh plus the buzz around the serial killer called “jack the ripper”

Now that in itself didn’t really interest you

But what did was how the media seemingly just ate it up

They speculated and theorized of who done it

Seemingly sickly enamoured by the mane who butchered innocent women who just were trying to get by

Those same victims seen as nothing more than side notes to the man himself

Their murderer

The ripper

At this point your not sure what’s worse, the idolizations of the killer or how the victims themselves are seemingly shamed for their profession

Anyways

Unbeknownst to you Jack had the uncanny ability to see people’s souls as colours along with their emotions

But for you there was nothing

Absolutely nothing except for sparks of electricity? Of sorts that buzzed around you

Ever the gentleman he offers you a spot at his table and even buys you a cup of tea

He insists and you allow him with a smile

You can never pass on a good drink and someone who wanted to talk

Eventually as day turns to night he offers to walk you to your hotel

Saying that London streets aren’t exactly friendly to those alone at night and you agree

It’s on that walk he reveals more of his true intentions

Still cordial and polite but you can tell he’s holding back getting violent if you did not respond

So you respond with the truth since if he attacked he’d figure out you weren’t human anyways

Safe to say he’s very fascinated

For the rest of your stay in England you stick around with him

By your choice as well

He is an interesting man but one that you nether the less find yourself enjoying the company of

He is upfront with you about how he is a killer

And how he goes by the Jack the Ripper moniker after killing the original

He knows he’s not a good person but despite that you see that maybe he’s selling himself short

There’s apparently a secret organization in London that tracks down and kills far worse scum of society

Killing the original Jack the Ripper is also a sign that to you be at least has some moral code of sorts

He brushes your comments off, though you can see that it seems to somewhat resonate with him

You and him often discuss Shakespeare especially since you had met the playwright and even acted in a few of his productions

Though you don’t have a colour he associates your soul with that of a rich Violet

A beautiful colour for someone as beautiful as you are in both body and metaphorical spirit

When your time in Britain is just about up you and him go to see Hamlet

It would be a night he’d never forget since it filled him with joy that he had not seen since the early days of his childhood

He felt at peace for once

Even when you leave you continue to mail to him

Telling him of your travels around the world and even sending a few small souvenirs

When he dies he’s at least glad to have had 1 true friend

“ Aphrodite?, heh. A wolf in sheep's clothing. To exert a higher level of control over people, she puts on a graceful and beautiful front. Most of those who have seen her true colours know of her cruelty”

Through your journeys unlike your many human friends you’ve meet a handful of gods in your time

You don’t go out of your way to meet them

But sometimes fate has different plans

And though those encounters are rare they remain in your mind

For a few examples

You meet Thor when Odin’s Raven Huginn was injured

He was sent to earth to deliver some sort of message and inadvertently got injured

And that’s when you found him, a bleeding mass of feathers in the snow

Yelling swears that would make even Loki blush

The bird is at first hesitant to accept your help

For he saw you as just as human but he reluctantly accepted once realizing he could get nowhere

So you brought the immortal pet of Odin back to your cabin to heal him

Whilst the raven is boastful and full of pride

He eventually begins to like your company as you engage in long conversation with him

Most gods brush him off as annoying so it feels nice being appreciated

He won’t admit it but he might’ve began to get attached

He might not like humanity but maybe your an exception

Once he is healed enough to fly it’s when he is able to alert Odin to his location

And a meeting place is made

You bring him out into the freezing cold

He’s talking and your making hums of acknowledgment as he talks about the gods

It’s somewhat interesting getting his view of them since yours is relatively negative (except for your father and Buddha)

And then he pauses

the talkative raven suddenly leaps from your shoulder and into the air

Flying high as you spot a man…no a god

Long red hair, markings covering his skin, piercing eyes and a large hammer resting upon his shoulder

When you get within a couple feet of him and Huginn the god stares you down

The Raven perched on his shoulder talking his ear off about how you had brought him back to health

It is then you learn the person in front of you is Thor, the strongest of the Norse pantheon

One whom you heard was battle hungry

Though other than that you don’t know much of him

You stand before the god of thunder unfazed

Huginn seems rather surprised at that fact but doesn’t make a comment on it

Perhaps even somewhat amazed at that fact

Thor offers you a reward though he doesn’t seem enthusiastic as he says this

Likely just following the orders from Odin

You quirk an eyebrow

“I don’t want a reward in money, I just have a question for you oh mighty Thor”

His eyes widen ever so slightly but he nods

“What is that?”

“What do you desire out of everything in the world, what is the one thing you want despite being an all powerful god?”

Now that makes him pause

Of all questions be certainly didn’t expect that nor did the Raven that begrudgingly found itself enjoying your company

He answers and your not surprised

“An equal. Someone i could fight full strength and be at match with. That’s what I desire”

You chuckle a bit at this

“I’m not surprised, but that did fulfill my suspicions. I wish the best to you, that you’ll find that one day. Maybe we’ll cross paths again”

And with that he nods and turns around

What surprises him though is when he feels something hit is back

He turns, there’s snow sticking to his hair

But then that-

Your gone, completely and utterly gone when he turns around

The furious wind carrying snow that covers up any footprints

He realizes that by throwing that snowball you were in some way teasing him

Something he’d normally be able to detect before you even threw it hit him like he was nothing

He searches for you for the next couple of years, always searching through crowds whenever he’d have to go to earth for whatever reason

It gave him a sense of something

He wasn’t sure what it was but he knew he wanted to challenge you

He needed to conclude that fight you begun but left for him to finish

But for him he would get to fight you again at a raid Vikings were doing against a village you were staying at

You couldn’t just there and do nothing so you geared up and ran into battle

And that’s when you noticed a familiar red haired god watching nearby

And he seemed to spot you as well since the next moment your engaging in battle with him

The battlefield around the two of you in an icy wasteland is accentuated by crashing thunder and biting lightning as you exchange blows

That the normal apathetic face filled with giddiness at someone finally living up to expectations

The raid is long forgotten as everyone evades the area and you do your best to lead the fight into a nearby wooded area

Trees are flattened by his infamous hammer that now pulsates and cracks at the seams

Flesh spilling out of it as it beats like a heart

You use the trees to bounce off and lead him deeper into the secluded area

Eventually you wear him out just enough to get a hit that sends him staggering back

You could go full power but you decide not to since you’d rather have some cards up your sleeve

And as he’s on the shattered ground, kneeling as a hand is placed over his bleeding chest he asks for your name

You just reply your a wanderer before disappearing into the brush

He’s found by Loki not long after who is confused and somewhat scared at the fact Thor of all people has an almost fatal wound

When he asks the red head simply replies he was training and nothing more

Content on keeping your existence a secret for his own sake of having an equal

Loki doesn’t need to be the god of lies and deception to tell he’s lying but says nothing

Another god you meet is Ares during wartime

You were on the battlefield not fighting but just doing your best to help those who were injured

You’d had a good amount of fighting in your life and had decided to do you best to help instead

And there on the battlefield, bloodied and victorious is the god of war

You locked eyes with him yet didn’t waver

Instead focusing on picking up a solider who had sustained a leg wound

He looks over the human who relies on you and at his uniform

One of the men on his side

Unbeknownst to him someone was foolish enough to try and sneak up on him

But you mouthed the words “behind you” to the god

Within an instant the man is dead and your taking the soldier back to his camp

A small interaction but one nether the less

Sometimes in war you see him but you avoid being seen

Disappearing within the blink of an eye

You’d rather not have your immortal status be known to the gods

There’s a bit of resentment you hold towards him for your fathers sake

Being a lover of your dad’s wife, the goddess of beauty herself

Whilst your father is resigned to the fact that his wife will never love him and goes behind his back constantly

You can’t help but feel angry for him because at this point he’s used to it

Speaking of which

Your father visits you every 5 years on the eve of your creation

Though as he said when you set out on your adventures you can call to him whenever you need him

As usual he is kind and caring

You recount to him your travels

Your friends and all of the advancements in technology the humans had made

He listens with a smile, eyes twinkling with joy at your happiness

On these occasions he almost always gifts you something he’s made

All of which you use on your journey like the satchel that no one but yourself can open

Or your now iconic kasa hat with a veil trailing behind it which was inspired from your times in Japan

And your clothes built to be able to be able to withstand your power when you use them

Hephaestus isn’t used to affection from being scorned by everyone

So he melts when you hug him or hold his hand

You never hesitate to do so and the first time you initiate the platonic action of love he cries

The god of smithing usually talks of his latest invention or what’s happening with the gods

The usual petty squabbles over any inconvenience

being invited to their council meeting every 1000 years yet again but not being told until last minute

He worries for not only you but also humanity

He sees the resentment and disgust the others hold for humans, despite the entire race being moulded after them

They don’t seem to acknowledge that humans are just as flawed as they are

He knows he can’t do anything though

So he just focuses on his worries for you

About how it must be to loose all your human friends

For they age and you don’t

A small part of him expects you to resent him for making you immortal

Yet you don’t

Though yes, it is hard to befriend people knowing you’d always outlive them

And while there were times in your life you had craved death

You came to realize how You enjoy the fact you’ve lived long enough to meet them in the first place

To be able to see how far humanity has come and how far it needs to continue

To watch empires crumble but new ones be rebuilt in their ashes

To meet people like Hypatia or Nicola Tesla, minds ahead of their time only to be recognized for their accomplishments later

Sometimes when he feels more alone than usual he looks at the little gifts you gave him

And it reminds him of how he’ll always have you

The one person who would ever give him love

Something that even his parents had denied him for something that isn’t even his fault

And unlike his uncaring mother and father he’d always give you his love

His care and support

For he knows that someone deprived of that can end up becoming cruel and angry

Just like he had for so many years until realizing there was nothing he could ever do to get that love

But now he realizes that’s ok

they deserve him nor his care

Only his child does

“You want me to introduce myself? I've gone by many names and titles during my journeys. they're all just water under the bridge to me now and you can Call me whatever you like…but y/n is what I originally gave to myself”

When the gods gather for yet another 1000 year meeting Hephaestus feels little need to go yet attends anyways

Perhaps to spite those who wanted him not to go

He sits in his seat of sculpted metal

Normally he barely listens but when the fate of mankind is brought up he becomes deathly aware

X’s are thrown up by almost every god

And he’s left confounded on what to do

He doesn’t put up a sign yet no one notices

And the normally stoic and calm god is left silently panicking

Until a certain Valkyrie makes her appearance

He knew of her well enough

Valkyrie’s were some of the few who treated him fairly since they respected him for his craft of weapons

She offers an opportunity for humanity to prove itself

Ragnarok

An event in which 13 humans and 13 gods would fight to the death

At first not many are intrigued until she does something to ensure they would accept the challenge

She called them chicken, scared to face the humans they had created

Once the meeting is over the god finds Brunhilde and her younger sister Göll

The youngest scared to a T whilst her older sister remains dead calm

It’s there that he tells her that he’s an ally

And that there is someone that she might wish to contact for a fighter

And so she takes his advice and finds you having tea in your home

when she asks you to fight for humanity against the gods you agree

And so Ragnarok begins

[noahthesatanist]

A Light in the Abyss

Depression is a shadow that can feel all-consuming, swallowing joy, hope, and light. It isolates us, leaving us trapped within ourselves, as if there is no escape from the suffocating weight of it all. Many of us, whether we are theistic Satanists or not, have experienced moments of profound despair, wondering if the darkness will ever relent.

Lucifer, our Morning Star, speaks to this anguish "Me miserable! Which way shall I fly Infinite wrath and infinite despair? Which way I fly is hell; myself am hell; And in the lowest deep a lower deep, Still threat'ning to devour me, opens wide, To which the hell I suffer seems a heaven."

These lines echo the torment of those who feel trapped in their own minds. They remind us that the Hell we often fear is not an external place but something within ourselves a gnawing, relentless pit of suffering. Yet, even in this moment of anguish, there is something powerful in Lucifer’s lament. It is not a cry of surrender but one of defiance.

Lucifer teaches us to confront our suffering head-on. Even cast from Heaven, even in the depths of Hell, he refused to be broken. He took the fire of his rebellion and forged a kingdom from his agony a kingdom of strength, beauty, and freedom. Hell was not a punishment; it became a realm of creation and pride.

For those struggling with depression, this message is vital. Even when the world seems to collapse around you, when your mind whispers that you are unworthy or unloved, know that you carry the same spark of rebellion and resilience that Lucifer embodies. You may feel like the "lowest deep" is devouring you, but within that deep is the opportunity to rebuild, to reclaim your power, and to create something magnificent from the ruins.

To my fellow theistic Satanists, we know that Hell is not a place of torment but of liberation. It is where we can shed the chains of a cruel and controlling god, where we can embrace our true selves. Depression might tell you otherwise—it might say you are weak, that you are trapped, that you are not enough. But hear this: those are the lies of the tyrant who wants to see you broken.

To both believers and non-believers, there is wisdom here. Life, no matter how bleak it feels, is a canvas for your will. Even when the brush feels heavy in your hand, even when the paint runs dry, you can still create. Like Lucifer, you can turn despair into power.

If you feel like you are falling endlessly into a void, know that you are not alone. Reach out—to others, to your inner strength, to the universe, or to the spirits and deities who walk beside you. Even in the darkest moments, there is a spark within you. Nurture it. Fan it into a flame.

Lucifer reminds us that despair is not the end—it is the forge. From the fire, we emerge stronger, sharper, and more radiant. You are not weak for feeling pain; you are not broken for struggling. In the words of our Morning Star: “Better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heaven.” Take this to heart and reign over your darkness.

The road is not easy, and the struggle is real, but remember: Lucifer built his kingdom from the ashes of rejection, and so can you. Your Hell can become your heaven.

Hail Lucifer, the Lightbringer. May his example guide us through our darkest nights.

[whirligig-girl]

a thought occurred to me (that i shall now tell to you, my friend Callisto, who i am currently writing to in my discord DMs) If Henry's a 4-6-0, i think it makes a lot more thermodynamic sense than if he's a 4-6-2.

imagine if you wanted to make a more powerful Atlantic. (without sacrificing speed) ultimately you're going to need either more cylinders, or larger cylinders or both. but more tractive effort means less factor of adhesion. no use getting more tractive effort if you're slipping. So you add the extra drive wheel in place of the trailing wheel. this design now has three, larger cylinders. More tractive effort, and a relatively similar footprint. You will need a conjugated valve gear or at the very least three sets of walschearts valve gears, rather than internal stephenson valve gear. But the frames and boiler can be nearly unmodified. unfortunately after some analysis you, Sir Nigel Gresley, realize it's never going to work. There's just not enough fire grate area and you use steam faster than you can build it. You're going to need to start from scratch with a new boiler. That second plan is the first version of the A0 prototype, Gordon, which as we know is thought to have been refined into more or less mechanically identical to the production A1 class. but the first plans, discarded, were built as Henry. Henry should have same tractive effort and top speed, or nearly so, as Gordon, but without the boiler volume or fire grate area to match.

in theory running him as if he had indeed been an Atlantic--just as fast but with a shorter, lighter train--should have worked. But that's when we get into the other mechanical issues that resulted from being a… "bastard." I wouldn't be surprised if, at least before repairs were undertaken, Henry's boiler had to be de-rated to a lower pressure to avoid leaks (or worse). Lower pressure means not just less power, but less efficiency too. the Ivatt Atlantics and the Gresley A1 Pacifics had similar boiler pressures of 170 and 180 PSI respectively. (the A3s were uprated to 220 PSI; but Gordon probably never was since i believe his post rebuild boiler is his original boiler.)

Cylinders Two, outside (Majority), Four (2 outside + 2 inside) on No. 3292 Compound & 3279

WHAT

a C1 Atlantic was fitted with four cylinders????

No. 292, built at Doncaster in 1904 (but not entering service until 1905), was a four-cylinder compound. The high-pressure cylinders, having a diameter of 13 in (330 mm) and a stroke of 20 in (510 mm), were outside the frames, driving the rear coupled wheels; and the low-pressure cylinders, 16 by 26 in (410 by 660 mm) were inside, driving the front coupled axle. The valves were arranged so that the locomotive could work either as a compound or as a four-cylinder simple. The boiler pressure was 200 lbf/in2 (1,400 kPa), but whilst the boiler was under repair, the locomotive used a 175 lbf/in2 (1,210 kPa) boiler from 1910 to 1912. This locomotive was withdrawn in 1927 and scrapped in 1928.[9]

No. 1300, another four-cylinder compound, was an experimental locomotive which differed greatly from all of the others. It was built by Vulcan Foundry in 1905, largely to their own design although to Ivatt's specifications. The boiler had a narrow firebox, a diameter of 5 ft 3 in (1.60 m) and a pressure of 200 lbf/in2 (1,400 kPa). As with No. 292, the high-pressure cylinders were outside, driving the rear coupled wheels, whilst the low-pressure cylinders were inside, driving the front coupled axle; but their dimensions were 14 by 26 in (360 by 660 mm) and 23 by 26 in (580 by 660 mm) respectively. The engine worked as a two-cylinder simple on starting, changing over to compound expansion automatically. A superheater was fitted in 1914, and the engine was rebuilt as a two-cylinder simple in 1917; the new cylinders were outside, 20 by 26 in (510 by 660 mm) of the type used on class H3, driving the leading coupled wheels. It was withdrawn in 1924.[10] the cylinder diameters varied wildly on the C1s too

a compound loco would have superior efficiency. a simple loco with four cylinders on the other hand would chew through steam twice as fast. idk… idk… a 4-6-0 Henry with an atlantic boiler might not be possible

i mean the whole point of an atlantic is it's a 4-4-0 with a bigger firebox there were small boiler atlantics like this that could accomodate a third driver

but the outline of this engine is definitely more like James than Henry god and like. even this engine, with a much smaller firebox and boiler than the large boiler C1s, still has the same cylinder dimensions as them and only slightly smaller than the pacifics. giving Henry a big wide firebox matches the illustrations, it matches the tvs model, but… it's also explicitly the problem with Henry. so like. it's difficult to really figure out a realistic answer to what's wrong with Henry's design that would be fixed by better coal.

[frogblast-the-ventcore]

Guess who, and ive got my go-to 'mech with me.

The Centurion. no matter the era, this stubborn bastard will come plodding along ready to slug it out til either it or its opponent kicks the bucket. but i am not here with a CN9, instead i bring my take on the CN11-O, the 3111 Omnimech version of the old classic, as promised earlier

the CN11-O-NI (yes those are my accounts initials, im not good at creative mech designations) is designed to follow the originals general intention of being a reasonable and reliable all-rounder.

First up, the fundamentals of a 'mech. the -NI keeps the XL fusion engine and Compact Gyro of the base variant. a slightly explodely engine isnt ideal, but the gyro would actually end up being useful so that works. I replaced the IS double heat sinks with clan models, not that the space saving really matters as this variant sticks with the 10 engine mounted sinks. It sticks with standard armour, but it does carry an extra half ton over the base variant, 10 tons instead of 9.5. the most notable change is the 5 jumpjets i added, not many centurions variants have them but my second favourite 'mech the Enforcer spoiled me slightly so i like to have them.

Weapons, a few notable changes here. Ive exchanged the LRM 10 for an MML 9, allowing for some close range punch without entirely sacrificing range and indirect fire. 3 tons of ammo means there space to play around with specialty ammo, but ive gone with 1 ton SRM and 2 tons LRM (which is about what the base model had for its LRM).

The big one (or not so big one) is exchanging the LB-10X for a clan Large Pulse Laser, because i like my lasers and it saves 5 tons.

While 3 of those tons go to the jumpjets and armour mentioned above, the other two go to a pair of small pulse lasers, one in the right arm ala the CN9-AL, and the other facing rear in the centre torso for making sure infantry dont feel safe no matter where they are (i said the compact gyro would be useful). Having the small pulse laser facing backwards means i can turn both ER medium lasers, the only holdover from the base model, to the front arc for no reason other than being able to punch thing in the face harder.

Ive only just realised writing this up that i havent played with the quirks at all, so all its got is the easy to pilot of the base model, but hey it was never meant to be that fancy so it works.

Amidst clantech ATM boats or 3153 rebuilds of crazy super weapons, this mech is simply meant to be mine, what id picture myself actually piloting, a reasonable 50 ton trooper for later time periods without being stuffed to the gills with the most advanced tech the setting has to offer. perhaps the sort of thing that might be piloted by some poor davion that got claimed a bondsman by some crazy old clanner in a Highlander and dragged into the reborn SLDF, as an example

Anyway, i can only resist the urges for so long so imma go and stuff it with clantech now, or maybe come up with a really mixedtech version

Well, this looks quite good to my eye. I shall seek additional commentary.

[anonymousonlyanonymoud]

The Lost de Rolo Chapter Two

Scries and Answers

Previous Chp Next

After that morning's revelations and decisions, Vox Machina began preparing for their next journey.

Grog, Scanlan, Vex, and Trinket had all gone to the shopping district of Emon to stock up on healing potions, weapons, and whatever else they thought they would need before setting off. But what surprised everyone, was when Vax had declined to go with them.

They may tease him about the flirting between himself and Gilmore, but there was a genuine friendship between the rogue and sorcerer.

So, it felt a bit worrying that Vax was not jumping at the chance to see Gilmore and only gave a half-hearted reason to go to the temple.

Vex had eyed her brother, giving him a look that said 'We will talk about this later,'

Vax responded with one of his own that told her, 'I know,' as he trailed after Percy and Pike.

The three of them walked in silence, Pike's armor being the main sound as they made their way toward the Temple.

The rogue hung back at the end of their little train, his feet feeling like lead as they drew closer to the temple.

He was happy that Percy would get answers for his sister, Vax truly was. What worried the half-elf was the question he needed to ask, and the answer he may receive.

When they entered the temple, there were the usual groups of worshippers praying to Sarenrae and speaking with the clerics mingling around.

Pike weaved her way through the worshippers, stopping before the familiar elderly man dressed in the robes of Sarenrae and thinning hair on the top of his head,

"Father Tristan,"

"Pike Trickfoot. We welcome you and your friends here," The man said while giving the gnome a slight nod,

"Thank you, Father. We need your assistance on a private matter,"

Father Tristan looked between Pike and the two behind her, his eyes squinting a bit at Vax and Percy before nodding and leading them away from the main hall of the temple.

When they were separated from the rest of the groups, Father Tristan asked what they needed,

"I'm sure you've heard of the latest escapade that we went on," Percy said to which the cleric nodded,

"Yes. The tale has spread about your victory against those unholy creatures that subsequently freed our Sovereign and an entire city from their control," He said, "Many have come to pray for those recently freed. For the Everlight to assist Lady Cassandra as she leads your people through the rebuilding of Whitestone, My Lord,"

At first glance, it would seem like hearing himself being referred to as 'Lord' had little effect on Percy. But both Pike and Vax saw him make a small, jerking flinch that went unnoticed by those around them.

Percy managed to clear his throat,

"I... thank you, Father. I will be sure to inform my sister of the support we have here with the Everlight's followers," He straightened his shoulders and began their business as to why they had come.

The older Cleric listened to why they were seeking his help, a frown forming as Percy came to the end of their tale,

"We are aware that the source we got the information from is possibly the most unreliable out there," Vax said, 

"That is true," Replied the Cleric, "Though, I can understand the need for truth in this matter,"

Father Tristan went silent for a long moment, deep in visible thought as he pondered the situation before saying, "I shall do what I can to assist you, My Lord. But, am I correct in assuming you have nothing that connects to your sister? No objects or clothing that would have belonged to her?"

Percy shook his head, "No. Everything that belonged to my family was destroyed years ago,"

"I see," Father Tristan hummed, "That will make scrying difficult,"

"But not impossible?" Questioned Pike, a hopeful tone lighting her voice,

"No. Not impossible," He replied.

Father Tristan continued his conversation with Pike and Percy, but Vax had distanced himself from the trio. 

The rogue found himself standing before the main altar of Sarenrae and stared up at the image of the Everlight. 

He was never one for prayer, especially since he and Vex'ahlia had returned to Byroden and were told that their mother had been killed. But recently... Vax has been unsure as to where to turn for answers.

Ever since the feast, since Sylas Briarwood had used him as a blood bag, Vax had been having...

Dreams? Visions?

It always happened when he was asleep, but they never felt like dreams.

Vax, when he went to sleep, would fall. However, it wasn't like falling from a cliff. It was more like... Sinking into a pit of honey.

But instead of honey, it was soft feathers that gently lowered him toward into a dark, endless void that was filled with shadows. Shadows that were illuminated by streaks of gold that flew illuminated the darkness.

There would be a gold streak circling around him, weaving up from the ground before becoming level with his chest and branching out in two directions.

The first found its way around a group of people Vax recognized easily as Vox Machina, illuminating their faces with its gold light while a small section branched off to circle tightly around Vex'ahlia.

Vax would always try to walk towards his friends, but the second streak would always pull him back, tugging him further into the darkness until his friends, his family, were no more than a small, golden light in the distance.

He would then be faced with who was on the other end, but could never make out who it was.

This figure would be clouded in a black energy with an electric purple hue that reminded Vax of Delilah Briarwoods' magic. 

Vax would stare at the figure, unable to make out anything other than emerald green eyes that peered at the half-elf through the magic surrounding them. 

The rogue would try to catch a glimpse of the face behind the haze, but his concentration would be broken by the croaking call of ravens as a pale, masked face loomed over the both of them.

Vax would jolt awake in a cold sweat after meeting the dark holes of the mask were eyes were supposed to reside.

He'd been unable to make sense of, whatever these things were. But, Vax needed to be sure this was nothing in relation to the Briarwoods. 

Delilah Briarwoods had been a damned necromancer, it didn't seem beyond the realm of reason for her to be able to reach out to the living. And if she were trying to make some kind of connection with the living world through Vax, the half-elf needed to find out how to severe it before she succeeded,

"Hey, Stringbean?" Vax tore his gaze off of the Everlights image and looked down at Pike who returned his gaze with worry, "You okay?"

He glanced back up at the altar before responding,

"Yeah, Pickle, I'm okay. Just thinking things over,"

His friend looked unconvinced, but temporarily dropped the subject and pointed to where Father Tristan and Percy stood,

"If you're sure. We're ready to start,"

The room Father Tristan led them to was dimly lit with candles as a bowl of what Vax assumed was Holy Water sat on a small table.

The older Cleric stood at one side of the table while the members of Vox Machina stood at the other,

"This may take a moment," He murmured while focusing on the water, "And as I said before, Lord de Rolo, this may not work,"

"I understand," 

Vax could see Percy's fists clench at his sides.

Father Tristan began speaking down toward the Holy Water, casting a spell that made it glow as the surface shimmered.

There was a blurred image shown that began to fade as soon as it appeared, prompting the Cleric to renew his spell with vigor. His eyes scrunched in concentration as Percy grasped the edges of the table with shaking hands.

Pike rested her hand against Percy's, and the Lord glanced down at her. The gnome offered an encouraging smile then turned toward the water, prompting Percy to the same as Vax came to stand beside them.

The water's surface was still blurred, but it slowly began to clear after a few excruciating minutes to show them the image of a young woman with striking white hair that was pulled back into a loose braid,

"Is that her, Percy?"

Percy didn't answer Pike as his gaze was fixated on the image before them.

Vax stared at the image from over his friend's shoulder, studying what was shown in the water.

The woman was walking down a crowded street that looked familiar to Vax.

He'd walked that street before, looking for the people who were after his sister. 

Vax had followed a dwarf with a staff made of tongues into that building.

Vax had walked down that street, away from that building with a threat looming over his head, while the new brand on his back burned under his cloak. 

The group watched the image in the water as the woman, whom Vax assumed was Percy's sister, entered a tavern that the rogue recognized.

But as Ciara stepped inside, the image flickered and blurred before fading completely, showing only their reflections in the water,

"No! No!" Percy's head shot up and his eyes landed on Father Tristan, "Bring it back! The image! That was her! Bring it back!"

The Cleric shook his head with a weary sigh, "There is something blocking my sight, My Lord. I'm afraid that I am unable to-"

"Try! Please just-"

"Percy!" Pike was now between Percy and the table. The gnome grasped his hands tightly as she said, 

"Percy, for an image to be disrupted like that- Something had to have disrupted it,"

"But we didn't see anything, Pike!" He exclaimed, "We only saw her walk into a damned building! And we don't even know what or where that is!"

"I know where that is," Everyone turned toward Vax who had slunk back into the shadows of the room, "I know that place,"

Percy reached Vax in two steps and grasped the rogue's arms, "Where is she, Vax?"

The half-elf remained silent for a long time before carefully peeling Percy's fingers from his arms,

"Westruun,"

"Westruun? Are you sure?" Pike questioned, "I don't recognize where-"

"Pike," The serious tone of his voice had her cutting off, "I know that area. It's in Westruun,"

Percy stepped away from Vax, his shoulders dropping in relief, "Westruun is only a day's journey from here. Ciara is closer than I could have ever imagined,"

"There is a darkness about her, My Lord. Even through the scrying I could see it," Father Tristan added, "I'm unable to discern what caused it, but don't imagine your sister has had a good life,"

The members of Vox Machina all tensed as each of them remembered a smoking demon made of shadows that had made itself known underneath the Castle of Whitestone.

A harsh sigh left Percy as he began pacing the room while violently tugging at his hair,

"But she is alive! And we know where she is!" He whipped his gaze toward the older cleric, "And right now, that's all that matters to me!"

With those last words, Percy stormed out of the room, the door slamming against the wall as he left.

Pike sighed while gently clasping her symbol of Sarenrae before apologizing to Father Tristan,

"We do appreciate the help, Father, truly," The Cleric waved his hand in a slight dismissal,

"I can understand his frustration, Pike Trickfoot. Though I do not appreciate it being thrown at me,"

Pike apologized a second time and made to leave the room, but stopped when she saw that Vax hadn't moved,

"You go on a head, Pickle," He said, flashing her a tight smile, "I'll catch up,"

Worry was still visible on her face as she nodded and exited, leaving Vax and Father Tristan.

The Cleric tilted his head, "Is there more assistance required of me?"

Vax sighed, pushing off of the wall to stand more in the center of the room,

"Yes. I am, worried that the Briarwoods have, left some kind of mark, or, connection to me," He said, then began explaining the dreams, or visions, he'd been having.

Father Tristan listened carefully to what Vax told him and thought for a long while before agreeing to check for any dark arcane energy that maybe clinging to him.

He placed his hands on either side of Vax's head and murmured a few words as the symbol around his neck began to glow. 

A divine energy began to pulse through Vax and he felt a warmth fall over him. It wasn't invasive like Sylas' charms had been, but it was more like a friend welcoming him home, a secure embrace that made him feel safe. But, despite the warm feeling, it still felt uncomfortable having someone else in his head so soon after the Briarwoods.

It lasted about five minutes, then Father Tristan let his hands fall to his side as Vax released a breath he had been unconsciously holding.

He blinked a few times and looked at the Cleric, fearing the worst as Tristan began to speak,

"I can say with absolute certainty that there is no dark magic left by those unholy creatures," The weight on Vax's shoulders immediately lifted.

But it came back crashing down on him with Father Tristan's next words,

"There is, however, someone watching you," Vax stiffened, "But there is no darkness within this gaze. I cannot say who, but there gaze is, divine, in nature,"

Feeling more confused and uneasy than before, Vax questioned,

"Why would something like that be watching me?"

"I cannot answer that, Vax'ildan. I have a feeling, that the answer will be one you must decipher for yourself,"

---

The small tavern was quiet when Ciara de Rolo entered. But what surprised her was the fact that it was empty. Even though it was about midday, there would be some signs of life roaming about.

But at first glance, it seemed like Ciara was the only one there.

However, there was a man sitting in a darkened corner, the red glass of his monocle glinting at her through the low light,

"You were almost late," He tsked, "You know how dangerous it can be, to be late,"

Ciara said nothing as Spireling Shenn stood and began making his way toward her.

The man towered over Ciara as he stepped directly before her,

"Oh, why so quiet? I do love our chats,"

She dared not move and carefully forced out,

"You called me. That means you have a job,"

Shenn's face twisted into a smile, "Down to business as usual, Little Bird. Very well, very well,"

The Spireling straightened up and motioned for her toward the table,

"Sit. Have a drink and we'll discuss what I need from you,"

Ciara pursed her lips, closed her eyes, counted to ten, then sat across from the Spireling and braced herself for the long, drawn out meeting she would be forced to sit through.

[csuitebitches]

Hello there. I find you blog extremely inspiring.

I myself am something of a "former gifted kid". Back in school I was at the top of the grade, best skin, many skills etc etc. And though I'm still *extremely* young (~20) I've descended into a hellish level where I look disgusting, can't study properly or am performing poorly, my hobbies are all well and good but I can't spare time to do some actual intense projects like I used to, I couldn't get into med school this year and yeah. I just feel like shit. I'm trying my best to rebuild my life. Sorry for the rambling.

Everyone has their up and down cycles. This too shall pass.

Whenever you’re struggling/ having a hard time sticking to a routine, there is only one solution. Break your goals down to not more than 3, which can be achieved in a year.

One. your most important goal seems to be med school. What are the two-three habits that you need in order to achieve that?

two. Unless your school counsellor or advisor has recommended you take on intense projects, I think it would be a better use of your time to focus primarily on med school. Eliminate distractions and things that do not directly contribute to your main goal of getting into college.

if med school is not in the books anymore, talk to counsellors, advisors, alumni, teachers, and most importantly - figure out what it is you truly want to do in your career.

three. If med school is still your top choice, and you want to try again…. If you can’t study properly, stop studying the way you have been your whole life. There’s no one single way of studying properly. You can create a schedule that’s a mix of flash cards, videos, Quizlet, tv shows that are directly related to your career choice, podcasts, magazines, books, tv interviews… If any of my followers have any more suggestions for OP, shoot below!

and lastly. It’s okay to not look like a beauty pageant 24/7. Like I said, make your routine simple. A 20 minute run, a weekly face mask, focusing on skincare (face wash, toner, sunscreen and moisturiser is more than enough at your age), showering regularly, eating loads of veggies and fruits, drinking water - what goes inside your body is more important than how you look outside. The second you fix your inside, your outside gets fixed.

[dearophelia]

best of sara's fic, according to her

Because I’m feeling some kind of way about my cancer lately and wanted to put together a Sara’s Greatest Fic Hits while I’m still around to do it (which is a morbid thing to type, but see the intro: been feeling some kind of way lately).

These range from my most popular fics, to the ones lost to weird posting hours, and everything in between. If I counted correctly, there are 14 fandoms on this list: from Mass Effect and Dragon Age, to Grey’s Anatomy and Stargate SG-1, to The West Wing and Calvin & Hobbes.

I’d appreciate reblogs on this (I am not ashamed to pull the stage iv cancer card here) so it can reach as many people as possible.

I have been writing fic for over 15 years; this is not a short list.

All are rated T or lower unless otherwise indicated. All stories are at or under the 3k mark unless otherwise indicated.

Stargate SG-1:

waves are universal (the heaven in hiding remix) (Sam/Jack; I’m very Normal about this fic; time travel and alternate realities, a host of OCs (and some familiar faces from Norafic if you look closely), oh and the Sam/Jack kid from the alternate reality! Only she’s an adult and working on a way to save the world! This has it all, folks: humor, romance, angst, action! I told you I’m Normal about it; 40k)

strange is the night where black stars rise (Sam; horror! A low creeping sense of doom! The King in Yellow! No, seriously, fuck that planet; 10k)

#sg1wedding (Sam/Jack; their wedding turned into An Event against their will; bets are going down about who would win in a fight: Bra’tac or the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs; also Jack loses his socks; twitterfic from 2012 and technology has definitely Marched On, just read it like an unhinged group chat fic)

phoenix (Sam/Daniel/Teal’c, Sam/Jack, Sam/Jack/Daniel/Teal’c; apocalypse (that I consulted a real live geologist on!); rebuilding in the wake of said apocalypse; team family feelings, kids, and some really shitty neighbors; 38k)

Dragon Age:

joy cometh in the morning (Ariadne; rated M; a host of OCs; mind the warnings; friendship; worldbuilding galore; friendships and mentors and first loves; did I mention friendship and worldbuilding?; 56k)

through the rude wind’s wild lament, and the bitter weather (Ari+Cullen; quiet magic, kind magic, good magic is still new to Cullen)

as the sun kissed the horizon (Ari/Josephine; a relationship in ten moments)

‘til we meet again (Ari+Cullen; platonic sleeping together!)

so hold my hand, consign me not to darkness (Ari; her faith is the core of who she is and, for the first time, Andraste isn’t there; post-Trespasser)

raise your fists up to the sky (Kylie/Krem; it’s Krem’s first day with the Chargers and there’s a naked elf in the middle of camp)

every demon wants his pound of flesh (Krem+Bull; Krem was in the Fade with the Inquisitor and the fear demon had some Things To Say To Him)

black dove (Anaya) & strange little girl (Anaya+Dagna) & dissolving clouds (Anaya+Cullen) (because neurodivergent Inquisitor, friendship, blossoming romance, and three very different takes on blood magic)

skeletons (Zahara+Bull; she is saarebas, he is Ben-Hassrath, and language is important)

children shouldn’t play with dead things (Juliette Amell; she’s always had an easier time with the dead than the living; cw for bugs)

a sorta fairytale (Josephine/Cassandra; flower shop & tattoo parlor AU; 8k)

Mass Effect Trilogy:

gonna set your flag on fire (Nora Vakarian, Liv/Garrus, James/Liara, Liv+Liara, Livfam; action! Humor! Angst! Worldbuilding! OCs!; I am Super Normal about this fic too; I promise everything’s okay in the end, promise, even though it isn’t written yet; Nora is an N3 and has an inactive control chip in her head. She and her team are ordered to investigate a Cerberus facility. It goes, shall we say, awry; 40k)

anthem (Liv/Garrus, Hannah/Zaeed, Liv+Liara; eight months is a long time without each other; angst with a happy ending (I promise); post-Destroy; 13k)

holy ground & dress (Liv/Garrus; ficlets from the night he gets sworn in as Councilor)

brightly shone the moon at night (Liv, Liv+Liara, Liv/Garrus, Livfam; five Christmases in Olivia Shepard’s life; 5k)

the pieces of gold, they light up your eyes & now we’re alone, now we’re alive (Liv/Garrus; the evolution of a relationship)

fighting is said to have reached palaven (Liv/Garrus; please, please let him be alive)

and some things you just can’t speak about (Quentus+Nico; the war)

‘cause i know that it’s delicate (Liv/Garrus; pre-wedding!)

nosce te ipsum (Nico; he likes boys and fanfiction and he didn’t think he’d get his little italicized oh moment)

i will write you love letters if you tell me to (Liv/Garrus; Hannah gives him one of Liv’s notebooks before he goes off to Omega; Garrus does the only thing he can think of with it)

i really need you (Liv/Garrus; James POV during the reunion scene in Priority: Palaven)

you look really tired (Liv/Garrus, Liv+Liara; post-Thessia, Olivia’s not doing well)

hey, so, ground rules (Liv+Zaeed; it’s a lot weird now that he’s dating her mom)

and all the scars you bear are from a previous war (Liv+Quentus; Mom!Liv)

you can hear it in the silence (Liv/Garrus; just a moment, post-war)

this all started because of a bad day (Liv/Garrus; from first meetings to matching rings)

combat, i’m ready for combat & turn on your favorite nightlight (Hannah; she’s a civilian and her daughter isn’t, and she’s bound and determined to know what Liv goes through when her boots hit the ground; Hannah, Zaeed, Liv, and Garrus hit up Armax)

four quarians who never made it back to the fleet (and one who did) (kinda what it says on the tin, honestly. Oh, Tali’s in this!)

everyone’s lost, the battle is won (Evangeline; somewhat predictably, my experiment in getting as many of my team killed as possible resulted in Feelings About It)

across the sky (Susan/Liara; how to make the Control ending feel good)

and yours is in red underlined (Vanessa; The Illusive Man has pissed her off for the last time)

i’m headed straight for the castle (Vanessa; renegade control ending; kneel before your queen)

Mass Effect Andromeda:

for saviours (Tori; ten scenes from a pre-Andromeda life; 10k)

ringing joyful and triumphant (Tori/Liam/Jaal; just some morning fluff)

the thing with the baby angara (Tori/Liam/Jaal; thinking about the future)

the undone and the divine (Tori/Liam/Jaal; the lone single solitary explicit fic on here, give it props for that alone; Liam gets absolutely railed by his partners. That’s it. That’s the fic.)

you’re like the thing that makes the universe explode (Sara Ryder/Suvi, Drack; kid, the only people who don’t know that you like Suvi are people who haven’t met you and Suvi)

this one’s for the torn down, the experts at the fall (Tori+Garrus; one night in the intersection of Victoria Ryder and Archangel; maybe they’re better friends than they both thought)

The West Wing:

a great revelation sigh (CJ; she’s Chief of Staff; ten steps to the apocalypse; the apocalypse source probably didn’t age well, heads up)

it’s in my blood and i won’t give up ‘cause it’s running through my veins (Amy+Andi; it’s Election Day in the future and Amy has nothing to do)

Grey’s Anatomy:

dropsonde (the singers in a lower choir remix) (Addison/Alex, Derek/Meredith, Addison+Derek, Addison+Mark, Mark+Derek; the one that kicked off all the remixes; absolutely off the rails from canon somewhere in S3; budding romances and kidfic and my theory about people being storms and lighthouses; 40k)

scarlet city (Mark/Addison, Burke/Cristina; film noir gangster and detective AU; Addison’s the gangster, Burke’s the detective; literally everyone I could fit into this fic shows up; also Denny is comic relief; 18k)

Misc:

access records (Star Trek Voyager; Naomi Wildman’s holodeck access for the past week; worldbuilding!)

in this twilight our choices seal our fate (the song in the house of night remix) (SVU; Olivia/Elliot; rated M; on the rise and fall of partnership; probably a little too much religious imagery but what the hell else am I gonna do with a minor in religious studies?; 4k)

the end of days job (Leverage; Parker+Eliot+Hardison; the apocalypse job, basically; this one ages well!)

let the only sound be the overflow (D&D; Calia/Kelpie/Edal, aka ot3: fathoms below; the ocean is big and they are not)

we are golden stars above silver seas (we hear echoes from another galaxy) (Calvin & Hobbes; Calvin+Susie; throughout all those years, she never gave up on him; this one went viral on tumblr [LINK] and I cleaned it up for the AO3 version)

lift her, pull her, from the orchids (Grace and Frankie; Grace/Frankie; the one where I invoke the spelling bee)

rocket queens (Babylon 5/Pacific Rim; Susan Ivanova/Talia Winters; look, they’re jaeger pilots, I really don’t know what else to tell you)

the great gig in the sky (Battlestar Galactica; Six; rebirth is painful, she forgets this sometimes)

[nautiscarader]

What the hecking heck has happened? - a post-not-really-mortem

What the hecking heck has happened?

So you might have noticed I have been absent for the past 2.5 months. So, where have I been? What has happened to me?

Well, you see, I got this magical music box, and when I opened it, I was transported into a different world full of talking frogs, toads and newts! I've had wonderful adventures, made lots of friends and-

Yeah, nope. I've been in a hospital.

WITH NO INTERNET

I feel you, Anne.

But let's start…

Serious warning: I will be describing my stay at the hospital, and it may get touchy for some of you. Proceed with caution.

Chapter 1: "Not so much Fall as Saunter Vaguely Downwards."

So in mid-November I fell from my bed. I have multiple sclerosis and for the life of me I couldn't lift up. I had lots of bruises, so I had to be taken to hospital to clean them and then do something more with my illness… But that is just the beginning…

Chapter 2: The ballad of lemon cocaine

So here I am, lying in bed, getting meds, and around day 3 the nurse brought me a small cup full of white powder. I looked at her and blurted out "What am I supposed to do with it, snort it?" and she replied "No, sir, you're supposed to mix it in your tea or soup… " and she went away. That powder was some protein to help my wounds rebuild, btw.

But a few weeks down the line there was a twist: they gave me another powdered drink, and this one was lemon-flavoured! So I was mixing them up and called it "lemon cocaine". And it was delicious.

Chapter 3: And then shit happened

There is this nasty thing called Clostridium which gives you diarrhoea. And I caught it. So for the next ten days… well, I was busy, shall we say.

Yeah.

Chapter 4: "we got robbed!"

Imagine my surprise when one day I get a call… from Police. Turns out someone broke into my and my neighbour's basements.

So I've had another thing to worry about.

For exactly two days.

Because the thief took my neighbour's power cutting tools… AND PUT THEM ON AN AUCTION SITE.

WITH LOTS OF PICS [READ: EVIDENCE]

So that went smoothly, we both recovered everything stolen.

chapter 5: Then I was robbed.

Of some shirts. Because I was putting my used shirts and shorts in a special, red garbage bag. What I did not know is that red garbage bags are used for hazardous materials.. you can guess what happened.

RIP to my original Wakfu kickstarter shirt.

Well, it had a rip, so…

Chapter 6: Return of the shit.

So… one day my doctor came and said straight to me.

Another 10 days…

Chapter 7: I am thick skinned

And that is a problem for applying cannulas (cannuli?). Those things they insert into veins to make drips work. Apparent;y my skin is thick and locating blood vessels was incredibly difficult sometimes. The record was 6.Six times they stabbed me until it worked.

And even when they worked,the band-aids they used just wouldn't stick to my skin.

Chapter 8: Hot potato, cold potato.

So here is a thing: I don't like lying next to a heater, especially at night. I have troubles with breathing, get sweaty, etc. So naturally, they've put me right next to one. But it was okay,cos I could just turn the knob to 0, right?

No,I couldn't.

One nurse couldn't.

Second one couldn't.

A PLUMBER couldn't.

So they had to move my bed to the opposite side of the room, with the plumber telling me he'd fix it.

That was the last time I have seen him.

But after a week they moved me from neurology to neurology rehab ward, where…

They've put me in a bed next to another heater!

But this time, there was a twist… or rather,there wasn't. COS THERE WAS NO KNOB.

It took them three weeks to find one.

Chapter 9: Rehab

So I was moved to a rehab ward, where every day I was being stretched, twisted and reassembled so I can move a bit better.And honestly, all the workers they were flipping fantastic - so compassionate, so understanding with patience of saints. I will cherish time I spent with them forever.

Chapter 10: Christmas on closed ward

Time moved on, and, well, Christmas has arrived. And we've had a really neat Christmas eve celebrations! I even got an unexpected present - the mother of another patient in our room (of 4) got each of us a Gilette razor - kinda useless for me,since I was using electric one, but it was so neat, wrapped in red ribbon and all! And she baked us all cakes! And brought a small Christmas tree. Luckily, I had some sweets of my own, I gave them in return. I know it may sound silly or insignificant, but it really was a heartwarming moment.

Chapter 11: In which I became Mr. House

So, no joke, all this time as I have been lying and doing nothing, I was composing this post in my head, with gifs. And one joke would have been that I looked like this:

but I felt like this:

Well.

WELL, WELL, WELL.

Imagine my surprise when one day my rehab guy put me onto THIS COCKING MEDIEVAL TORTURE RACK.

I mean, I have always suspected that irony is another force in our universe, but that has to be a definite proof, right?

I was actually feeling pretty down that day, but when I saw this, I started laughing like a maniac. I explained the joke, since he never played FNV, but he laughed too. We started calling it "mr House treatment".

Chapter 12: The wheelchair.

Around week before Christmas, I was put for the first time on a wheelchair.And after a month of being immobile… it was exhilarating,to finally be able to do SOMETHING on my own.

And then mid-January I got my own! For free! Something something government funding, something something disability insurance, yadda yadda, who cares? I now had a wheelchair!

So for the next two weeks I have been training to make my body adjusted to my new permanent part.

And then… I was out.

AND THEN I NEARLY THOUGHT THE THIEF STOLE MY ROUTER. But no, it was simply hidden for cleaning.

So all this time I have been thinking, which character should I try to identify with?

Maybe Oracle?

Or that kid from that one ATLA episode?

But then I realised there is only choice…

I AM NOW COCKING DAVROS!

So, what now?

As of right now, I am officially disabled.

I take tons of meds, have nurses to help me, and I have to learn to live anew.

It is tough, sometimes really tough.

So I ask you all to be a bit more patient with me.

I will be slower with updates, fics, etc. because I am slower now IRL.

But know that if you are reading this, then you are my friend and I love you.

Oh, and speaking of fics.... Nah, I'll leave it as a surprise ;)

Oh and here is an unnecessary sequel!

[thyras]

→ next to you

PAIRING → halbrand (sauron) x f!oc!sabina

WORD COUNT→ 2.7k words

WARNINGS → mentions of smut (nothing explicit), soft!sauron, slight redemption arc (if you squint)

SUMMARY → it has been months since eregion's fall and sabina gets an unexpected visitor in her realm.

AUTHORS NOTE - hyarlinya is a city I came up with, sabina has taken over the untapped realm of enedwaith, where her master used to reside. she has become their queen in a since. btw i also am working on kind of explaining sabina's parentage so some confusion around that will be revealed in another fic.

SAURON X F!OC!SABINA MASTERLIST

Her limbs stretched out and were met with the soft embrace of his body. She rolled and was met with the shining blue-green eyes of his human form. Sabina reached up in her sleepy haze and ran her fingers through his stubble. She had always had such a fondness for this form. Maybe it was because she was human, not that bedding a beautiful elf was not lovely. There was just something about this rugged, dirty look that set her a light.

Plus, it blended well into Hyarlinya’s already substantial human population.

“You came,” she breathed hoarsely as he looked confused. 

“Why would I not?” He asked with a raised brow as Sabina moved to lay her head in his lap as he moved to sit up against her headboard.

“You usually have more pressing matters than the goings of my kingdom.” She said, glaring at him back. He moved to run his fingers through her silky white hair.

“Maybe I made some time for you?” She shook her head and sat up. “Sabina,” he breathed; she ignored him and moved to grab her robe to cover her sheer nightgown. 

“You only make time when you need something from me.” This is how their relationship got in the months after Eregion. They got what they wanted. 

Olavi was dead. 

And he got his rings.

In order to keep unexpecting eyes from connecting the dots on their mutual quest, they parted ways, and she returned to Hyarlinya to rebuild it in her image after Olavi had nearly run it into the ground. It was a bustling port city in Southern Enedwaith, and though this kingdom was mostly untapped, she was its ruler.

The people trusted her and looked to her for direction, which made her powerful in the world of men. She was respected and had made many connections within the Númenórean realm. 

Hence why he was probably here. 

Not because he missed her as much as she had missed him. He was a man with only an army and a small realm who had a whole army of elves after him.

Sabina heard him get off the bed as she moved to sit down at her dressing table. “You are the most burdensome woman,” Sabina turned and smiled that sickly, sweet, seductive smile at him.

“You know you love it,” He rolled his eyes and moved over to her. “So why are you here, Mairon?” She asked, picking up her brush. “Or shall I call you Lord Halbrand? What are we running with these days? I can ne—“ His hand wrapped around her throat from behind as he tilted her head to face up, catching her off guard.

“I am here to see you,” his blue-green eyes darkened Into emeralds as he gazed into her sapphire waters. His thumb trailed across her bottom lip. She nipped at the tip, and his fingers tightened, causing her to whimper slightly at the feeling. “And to you, my goddess, I will always be Mairon.” Sabina bit her bottom lip as he released her. “Just Mairon.” He reached for the brush in her hand. She held onto it hard, not letting him have this moment of triumph over her. “Let me,”

He was never one to be soft, gentle, or even kind. So it caused alarm bells in her brain as she searched his gaze for any tell. “No,” 

“You are so infuriating. What do I need—“ She cut him off with a glare.

“Don’t show up unannounced under the guise of just wanting to see me when I know something did not go your way,” She turned and pointed her brush at him. “You did not listen to me, and now you want me to fix it.” He stepped away from her and turned to her balcony. “Thought so,” 

He turned back to look at her. Her fingers played with the ring on her index finger, a sign she was growing annoyed at this conversation and his consistent failure to complete a simple task she set for him. 

Something that ran in her family, clearly.

 “You think so lowly of me?” Sabina flashed a glance at him before turning back to her dressing table.

“No,” she finally breathed. “I just am growing tired of you lying to me and trying to play these mind games.” He raised a brow at her.

“I’m not lying to you,” She sent him the darkest look she could muster.

“You have been since Eregion,” she breathed. “You could care less about what happens to me as long as my little kingdom keeps doors open for you.” He rubbed his eyes in frustration and leaned against the door frame. 

“Why are you believing such things?” Sabina looked over at him, confused now.

“Because every man in my life has used me for their own gain, my father, Olavi, even you.” He softened; that little piece of his heart only reserved for her broke at the thought. 

Her father did not know about her, but Mairon knew if he did, he would have used her to wreak even more havoc. Olavi took everything from her; her personhood, innocence, and purity. Whereas Marion, or Sauron, wanted her for his own gain. In the beginning, he wanted her power and connections; that was. But now, he wanted just her. Sauron had been lonely for so long that he enjoyed her company, but Marion, he was so enthralled with her that he could not imagine his eternity without her. 

“What am I supposed to think?” she continued. Mairon looked at her as the sun bathed her soft, pale face and white hair in its rays. She was beautiful, goddess-like even. He had spent many a morning watching the sun bathe her in pure beauty. She really was the finest sowing of Varda’s creations. Her light was so pure now that he was not always around her to darken it with his shadowy hands. 

Everything about her sparkled and shined even in the darkness within him. He never wanted to dull that shine, only nurture it so she could become who she was supposed to be all along. It was why he had sent her here and proposed to be separated because he could see his dark already snubbing out some of her light. 

Mairon smiled at her. “You know, sitting there, you look just like your mother,” she narrowed her gaze at him. “I can see why he was so attracted to her light; it snubs out even the darkest parts of a person and makes them believe they can change.” She now sat up more suspiciously than before.

“Mamma told me not to be swayed by sweet nothings and false promises.” He nodded but moved over to her. His hand reached out to touch her cheek, but she grabbed his wrist.

“Sabina, please, what have I done to hurt you so,” She squeezed his wrist and released it.

“I care,” she swallowed hard. “When you’re gone,” Sabina said, almost too low for his ears to hear. His eyes softened, and he placed his fingers underneath her chin, a warm smile returning to his lips.

“I care, too,” his fingers touched her cheek. “But just as we said back then, we will have an eternity learning what love means for beings like us.” She smiled at him. He moved to kneel in front of her, and she cupped his scruffy face as his hands moved up and down her thighs. “I wish to not diminish you or make you any less beautiful, my love,” She wiped the tear from underneath his eye. “And that’s what would happen if you came with me.”

“But this is our plan,” She breathed against his face.

“It is, but as I told you once before, a King’s job is to protect his Queen.” He gripped her thighs as she moved to wrap her arms around his neck. “You run your realm and sit beautiful while I do all the dirty work.” Sabina giggled and granted him a short kiss. “Then, when it is all over, you can do whatever you wish with this land and its people.” 

Sabina granted another kiss, but this one was longer. “Just leave me something to work with now.” He chuckled and bit down on her bottom lip.

“Can I have you?” He breathed. Sabina broke away and ran her finger across his bottom lip.

“It depends on how you're doing on your end.” His eyes darkened, and he smiled darkly.

“Now that’s unfair,” he breathed. “You scorn me for coming here for business purposes, but,” He gripped her thighs and opened them, pushing up the sheer fabric and wedging himself between them. “Here you are mixing business with pleasure.” 

As his lips met her inner thigh, her fingers wound into his tousled coppery strands. Sabina’s head fell back as a whimper left her lips. The ache in her core rose as his dark tendrils pulled at hers, seeking entrance into her mind again. She could feel the longing on his threads and the lust to be seated inside her again like any starved warrior coming home after a long campaign.

His fingers crawled up to her opening as his lips nipped at the plump skin, tongue running across the broken skin his teeth caused. Sabina pulled on his hair as she arched her back towards him, but he gripped her thighs and held her to the chair. A moan left her lips at the denial. “No,” he growled. “I’m enjoying this,” 

She looked down at him and gripped his scalp. “Well, Anarya is going to show up soon, so—” Anarya, her handmaiden, usually came around at this time to get her prepared for the day.

“She can wait,” he breathed before hoisting her up as a giggle left her lips at his eagerness to bed her.

Linen, velvet, and cloth fell as they tore into each other until his fingers were gripped onto her hips as she rolled against him. Lips connected as they sunk into each other's mind and aura. His fingers moved and wound into her hair as she drove their highs. Both sought the comfort of the other like a starved animal, trying to quench the thirst to lose themselves in the pleasure of this reunion. Their previous conversation was all but forgotten.

“I missed you,” he breathed against her lips as she smiled into his. Her fingers moved to cup his face.

“I missed you, too,” she replied, laying her forehead on his. Her hips slowed as their labored breaths conjoined. Sabina knew this would never last forever, and they would always be parted, but she would always hold onto these moments forever, knowing there would come a day when they could finally be together.

His fingers trailed up and down her spine as she nuzzled into his neck. The only sound in the room was the waves crashing against the rocks and the gulls calling as they flew by. Sabina’s fingers moved across the sprinkling of hairs across his chest. “I like this form,” she said, breaking the silence. His chest moved as a chuckle rumbled in his chest.

“Was my last not adequate?” She looked up at him with a mischievous smile. He met her gaze and captured her lips softly.

“It was perfect for Eregion,” Sabina said as she broke away and ran her fingers across his stubbled face. “Completely impractical here.” He nodded. “I will say I do miss bedding an emissary of the Valar, but Halbrand,” She paused and straddled his hips. “King of the Southlands is more to my taste.”  Mairon lifted his hand to push some of her tousled white hair behind her ear before leaning in and kissing her jaw.

“And Sabina, Queen of Enedwaith, is more to my taste.” Sabina’s face warmed as she exposed her neck to his lips. “Anarya is coming,” he breathed on the heated skin. A few breaths later, there was a knock on her door. Sabina gave him a look and pushed on his chest to hoist herself out of the bed. 

She gathered up her clothes and threw his clothes at him. “Get dressed,” she whispered tartly. 

“Your Highness?” Anarya asked, concerned, as Sabina slid her nightgown back on and grabbed her robe. She looked back over, and he tried not to chuckle at what Anarya had called her.

“Your Highness,” he mimicked back with a chuckle. Sabina grabbed one of the discarded pillows and threw it at him. He tried to duck out of the way, but it hit him in the face, causing Sabina to smile at his jovial playfulness. He rarely ever goaded her into these types of things anymore, and she suspected it was just the manly form he would seep back into when he was here. His elven form was serious, but Halbrand was softer, playful, and much more Mairon than the others.

“Shut it,” she mockingly chided him before opening the door for Anarya. The two greeted each other, and the dark-haired handmaiden walked in. Her brown eyes widened when she saw him sitting up against the headboard.

“Hello, Anarya,” he said softly. She bowed her head and looked over at Sabina, a little uncomfortable.

“My lord,” She paused. “I was unaware, I would—” Sabina placed her hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Shall I have the kitchen staff set out another plate?”

“That sounds perfect. I can get myself ready today if you want to go and let them know,” Anarya bowed slightly, and the handmaiden left in a hurry.

“She’s very innocent for the likes of you,” He commented as Anarya was out of hearing range. Sabina glared at him as she reached to grab a dress for the day and started changing. Moments later, she felt his warm hands replace hers and began buttoning up the back of her gown. Her face warmed as his fingers caressed her exposed shoulders. “Now, this is more like you,” he whispered into her hair. “So scandalous that it is almost too much for me to let you out of this room.”

“I do have a kingdom to run,” she said as his fingers moved to grip the fabric of the bluish gown over her stomach. He leaned over and grabbed her brush before she sat down in her chair. 

His fingers delicately moved the brush through her long white silk strands. He was never this soft or gentle, but as she watched him in the mirror, she could see a soft warmth in his face. She knew somewhere in him, he was finding peace being here. 

Sabina grabbed the golden headpiece that she often wore—the twining of golden threads encrusted with vibrant rubies. She pushed it into place as his calloused hands took strands and wrapped them around the golden pieces behind her ear and at the crown of her head to hide them in her long hair. 

Once he was done, he brought her chin up to meet his blue-green eyes. Sabina’s face warmed underneath the adoring gaze. 

“I will bend my knee to you until my last breath,” he paused, and she smiled softly. “My sweet goddess of the stars,” his fingers dropped to where her necklace lay, tracing across the diamond jewels. “My queen of the light.”

“I am hardly that,” She whispered as his fingers trailed up the column of her neck.

“His magic may run through your veins, but you are truly a maiden of Varda. Your eyes shine like the brightest of stars while your skin glows like a full moon.” Sabina’s face warmed again.

“Your silvery tongue is going to get you into trouble,” she placed her hand on his chest and fluttered her lashes as he held her gaze again.

“Let it,” he breathed. His lips hovered over hers. “For I only wish to praise what is truly mine for eternity.” Sabina closed the distance and gave him a short kiss. “I wish to watch as you bring life and beauty back to these barren lands I’ve laid waste to so we can build this world into our image.” Sabina gave him another more prolonged kiss.

“I wish for that, too,” she smiled and moved to rub her fingers across his cheek. ��So we can live freely and peacefully.”

Mairon took her hand and helped her out of the chair. He ran his fingers across her cheek as she laid her head into his touch. She desperately wanted to believe there was still good in them both, but only time would tell. As long as they walked in unison, their dream of an orderly paradise would be much closer.

[the-littlest-kojin]

The Journal of Shio Shinju: The Coming Dawn (Dawntrail, Journal I)

Spoilers for: MSQ up through "The Coming Dawn".

Today, I was asked by Erenville to meet a client - not as Warrior of Light, but as a hero and adventurer. It is... Pleasant, to have someone recall that I do not wish to be always seen as the hero of the land.

The client is a Xbr'aal by the name of Wuk Lamat, who was recommended my services by Erenville. He is very careful with his words, but knowing that he has tacitly endorsed the task that Wuk Lamat wishes is enlightening, even if he is loathe to show it.

To demonstrate that I am sufficiently skilled for her task, Wuk Lamat had me accompany her for a miscellaneous task upon the Isle of Haam, wherein we dispatched an overgrown colibri - the kind of thing I used to do in the days before the Scions as odd jobs for the Adventurer's Guild. Apparently, my prowess with the blade was enough to convince her to lay out the task she wished of me, in addition to a bevy of personal details about her.

Wuk Lamat is the child of Gulool Ja Ja, Dawnservant of Tuliyollal - nation and capital city both - which lies at the heart of governance of Tural. It seems that there is to be a succession, as the current Dawnservant is aging past his prime, and so four claimants have stepped up. Erenville and Wuk Lamat both are rather quiet on the subject of most of the claimants, but one of them is "A man who is too ambitious by half", who "cannot be allowed to rule".

Concerning as this is, apparently Gulool Ja Ja expressly encourages the claimants seeking aid from outside of Tural, and so Wuk Lamat reached out to Erenville, who she considers a close friend. (Erenville professes to consider her an acquaintance at best, but see my note above, regarding whom exactly he recommended for her trial.) I was assured I do not need to give an answer this day, and so I will return to my room to ponder this - seeing a new land will be a wonder and a relief, and to be hired as what seems to be, in essence, a bodyguard sounds like a refreshing reprieve from my usual fare.

As a client, Wuk Lamat seems... Dishonest, but not in a malicious way. She lies as casually as breathing, but in the way that I have witnessed many people do when they are insecure, afraid, or both. She lies about her capabilities, and she lies about those lies, in order to make me like her. It accomplishes the opposite. But, I have worked for worse clients. I could work for her, easily enough. Leaders lie all the time. She seems to affect a gregarious visage when the mood strikes her, I could very easily see her rubbing elbows with Nanamo, Aymeric, and suchlike. She could very easily be a leader with such a skillset.

But I do not think she would make a good leader.

I think I shall have to see this other claimant with my own eyes - the one who is "too ambitious by half". Take his measure for myself.

Side-note: Investigate Turali language, a constructed language of all of the peoples of Tuliyollal, attain fluency without Echo ASAP.

Before I was able to retire to my chambers for rest, the (allegedly) retired Scions waylaid me - specifically with Alisaie hearing about the new job, and the twins setting out to attain their own invitation from Wuk Lamat to join the voyage to Tural - to further their goals of rebuilding Garlemald. Loathe as I am to share yet more of my time with the Scions, I can only hope that they recall that I am no longer their employee and no longer required to feign friendship with them. Cordiality shall be my refuge, I feel - Grandfather wishes me to not let asymmetrical feelings fester in my mind, and so I shall not.

I do, however, wish that whomever was primarily responsible for tutoring the Leveilleur twins taught them how to ask things, rather than assume or state them. Wuk Lamat has been polite and careful to always frame things as invitations or queries, and I hope that this habit of hers is not eroded by exposure to Alphinaud and Alisaie.

Krile, on the other hand, concerns me considerably less. While I have enough familiarity with her tactics vis-a-vis interpersonal relationships to not trust her (such as her manipulations with Estinien), I can understand her desire for an understanding of family and legacy. I will support such as best I can, while maintaining a cordial distance - although, if it comes to a conflict of her own interests against that of Wuk Lamat's claim for the throne... I cannot rightly say.

Too much unknown, too much hinging on the mystery of this "unfit claimant".