#i am really happy though especially bc there was a conversation beat in this one that

[pomefioredove]

Hi there! I’d like to ask for a match-up please!

Pronouns-She/Her/They

Star sign: Virgo

Personality-

I’m a pretty introverted and spacey person who doesn’t go out of her way to interact with others IRL and am perfectly fine being on my own—I thrive on living in my own imagination anyways. INFP would best describe me. However if someone starts a conversation with me first, I don’t mind engaging with them either. I float from social group to social group, and as such, I don’t really have a set group of friends.

I consider myself a good judge of character and am not quick to trust others. It takes alot for me to open up to someone (bc I’m very anxious and nervous), and loyalty is very important to me. In fact I’d say I’m too suspicious of others at times and that makes me appear paranoid, cold, or stand-offish. On the other hand, I can be trusted with whatever secret you have. I’m the type that others tend to turn to for advice, even though I don’t necessarily think I’m good at providing it.

Another thing I pride myself on is my work ethic. I may procrastinate a lot and have a strange way of thinking, but I always get the job done. I don’t like letting others down and hate it when I am underestimated. I’m not a leader and prefer to follow, but can take charge if needed.

I hold grudges easily but forgive just as easily too. I have a big need for personal space and am not openly clingy or affectionate, and prefer more subtle or low-key ways of affection. All in all, I’m a flexible person who can adapt to many things.

Likes/Hobbies-Theater (particularly musicals), ancient history and mythology, Gothic literature, horseback riding, ice skating, photography, image editing, journaling, board games such as DnD, video games (mostly single player games, RPGS, visual novels, and otome games), cosplay, traveling, warm weather

Dislikes-Math, bigots, cold weather, rain, insects, seafood

For match-ups, I prefer not being matched with any staff or Sebek or Azul.

Thanks!

I match you with 𝐒𝐢𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐫

The First Impression:

Being a decent judge of character himself, Silver is able to guess many things about you from the start. Your seemingly cold demeanor doesn't bother him in the slightest, especially as someone who's had the same judgments made about him.

Why He Fell:

Silver's life is rather chaotic already. Between school, family matters, and his training, he rarely gets the time to breathe... which he's sort of trained himself out of needing, anyway.

Perhaps it's you, your caution and your space, that helps him slow down for a moment. It takes the both of you some time to become comfortable around one another (and Silver isn't one to push you into anything), though over time, you both recognize that there's something good in both of you.

Silver deeply admires your work ethic (as unconventional as it may be), your wide array of skills and interests, your trustworthiness, and your need for loyalty... the former of which he's happy to provide.

The Relationship:

Silver is stable, he's reliable, and he's devoted even to the point of beating himself up when he lets others down. Being surrounded by such powerful mages from childhood to present has left him with some high expectations for himself, which often leaves him feeling inadequate.

You're each other's "safe person", a breath of fresh air for when the guilt of letting other people down weighs on the both of you.

Love with Silver is simple. It's soft. It's bereft of the expectations and perceptions of others, which makes it feel special beyond words. There's no pressure to be a perfect couple, or to do PDA (he actually likes that your style of affection is more subtle), or to be good at it at all. Silver is patient, he's kind-hearted, he's loyal, and he's not going anywhere. He's just as new to this whole romance thing as you are, and he'll be glad to take his time working through the anxieties of it with you.

[eggmixercortex]

19, 23, 24 for whoever is most fun for them :)

hi!! o/

19. What is their favorite number?

shiloh - 9 bc its the holy number

jackass - i think she likes primes. not any specific one just the idea of primes

23. How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)?

shiloh - guilt, mostly. it usually doesnt want for much so to speak but especially in regards to being able to attend prayers or enter holy ground (and even just general jealousy) it beats itself up over wanting something it either doesnt need or doesnt 'deserve'. really a 'i have it so good why am i not happy' deal

jackass - i think it depends. i would say she's kind of passively envious of how much of shiloh's memories remained compared to her own but that sort of thing isn't particularly actionable outside of her contact with the hunter. otherwise i think she's mildly shitty about it in terms of 'ill ruin it for you if i can't have it' but mostly in the way that if someone ends up not enjoying something she wants she'll be smug about it to herself.

24. Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom?

shiloh - shilloh broadly likes to present a very coarse attitude to the world so especially around drinking buddies or 'tough guys' they'll be very crass. it also enjoys teasing marlow frequently even though at least half of his fluster around it is emotional attraction that it misinterprets. generally pretty blase

jackass - i can't imagine her having too much difficulty speaking about sex although i suspect she may sound a little clinical to some. serious conversation or personally relevant information is probably for very close individuals only, she seems the sort to get more reserved the more serious or personal the topic

thank you!!!

[fordanoia]

Fandom: Gravity Falls || CW: Minor mentions of Blood  || Stan comes to Gravity Falls, but when Ford doesn’t show up he has to go looking for him. Amidst, a strange house and a mysterious presence he tries to figure out what exactly is going on and where Ford disappeared to.

Chapter: Answers

______(~10k words)______

[k1mdracu1a]

𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐚𝐦 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐚

requested!

summary: dating them includes hc with bam (my beloved)

warnings: established relationship, mentions of sexual activity, usual jackass idiocy

paring: brandon “bam” margera x gn!reader

a/n: i am currently high off my ass on benadryl bc tennessee allergy season is BRUTAL so if this is a wreck that is why

you two probably met through a mutual — like some dude you knew in high school invites you to a party and bam just happens to be there and you two hit it off.

takes you somewhere stupid for a first date, but because it’s him he makes it fun. i imagine it being something like window shopping at night, even though every store is closed, while eating shitty pizza by the slice that he insisted he pay for and getting milkshakes from a 24 hour diner.

hes definitely very clingy — in a cute way obvi. always hanging off your shoulders if you’re within arms reach, pulling you into his lap when you’re around the crew after a long day of filming and laying his head in your lap when he gets bored, forcing you to play with his hair. not that he really has to, you love it.

feel like grabby hands is something he does often

he gets a little whiny sometimes if he feels like he hasn’t been getting enough attention, but a kiss and a couple minutes of cuddling fixes that in an instant.

intense ass make-outs, like struggling to breath, on top of each other, yanking at hair and clothing like horny teenagers (which he basically is, let’s be honest), and not going further than just making-out because it’s more fun than sex sometimes. eventually things will mellow out until one of you pulls away and then you both just cuddle into each other and go to sleep.

every member of the jackass crew has a pain kink, you cannot convince me otherwise, i mean fucking look at what the do for a living. this obviously includes bam.

a sure fire way to drive him wild is to tug on his hair while he kisses or fucks you. he also adores when you scratch him or bite his shoulders and neck, he loves seeing the evidence of the night you two had etched onto his skin the following morning.

BUT he definitely has a sweet spot for soft sex, sometimes wanting to spend your precious alone time just showing you how much he loves you through touch, rather than just having sex with the goal of making you both o.

he is very sensitive under the boyish-stupidity he puts on for the camera and you would be the only person he lets fully see that side of him. sure, he shows bits and pieces to his friends, especially dunn, but it’s different with a partner. he absolutely values the trust in your relationship above all else, he loves knowing you will always be there for him as much as he enjoys being there for you when you need him.

showering together just because it’s fun, like having conversations while washing each other’s hair and fighting over water temperature until his mom yells at you two about the water bill.

PLAY FIGHTING!! beating each other’s asses for absolutely no reason when you get bored, it almost always ends in both of you laughing so hard your stomachs hurt. even when one of you bumps into a table corner or bedpost, the bruise it leaves behind is just another reminder of the fun you two have and another thing for the other to kiss.

april (queen frfr) most definitely ADORES you. she loves seeing how happy you make her son and she appreciates that you can get him to calm the fuck down from time to time. she also gives major “i take my sons s/o shopping and to brunch for fun” energy and i am totally here for it. phil is also appreciative that you give bam another person to fuck with besides them two.

getting high together and laying in bed listening to music, not talking or sleeping, just existing.

making cd mixes for each other

watching brutal horror together bc y’all think the gore is funny

car sex bc he’s lowkey an exhibitionist and you refuse to fuck him in public so he settles for parking lots where you two definitely shouldn’t be at night.

————

i feel like i’m gonna add more to this as i think of more stuff but i hope you enjoyed in the meantime!

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[obeymefictionwriting]

hi!! i hope you’re having a great day!! i was curious how the obey me ! boyfies (hcs) would react if their s/o who is selectively clingy w certain people kinda back off suddenly because they just feel.. embarrassed?? like when they were a kid people reacted negatively to their clinginess and would ignore them for it. and they just feel so dumb to show emotion & showing their clinginess? and they feel like they’re being a bother and being annoying too... & suddenly just feel like closing off from the world lol? & like they can just feel really out of place and get negative thoughts that they don’t belong there, X person or a group of ppl in the convo don’t wanna talk to them etc and feel like they don’t belong in the conversation if that makes sense (i get those thoughts especially when i’m in a group i feel like i get overlooked a lot lol and i’ve never really felt included + like i can just feel so overwhelmed sometimes about the amount pf people / crowds or feeling like i’m being judged bc i’m beating myself up mentally abt my insecurities and i just end up most likely having a panic attack and just like tearing up, either crying on the spot or trying to hold it in till i get home). i’ve been feeling like this recently and i’d love to see what they’d do if that’s possible please!! thank you so much!!

I love such requests and I want to remind everyone that my blog is a very safe space where we can imagine whatever we want for our MC and be proud of it. Happy to write it!

Lucifer:

He is stunned at first. Like, things were going great and suddenly, you are backing off?...

He looks you deep in the eyes, lifting your chin up, and asks softly "Is everything okay or do you need to share something?"

Is incredibly patient while you are trying to explain what's going on in your head.

Also, will not let you go unless you share everything to him about how you feel and why.

"I love you deeply and I hope my loyalty and love will soon help you realize what a wonderful creature worth of admiration you are".

Mammon:

Okay, he'll be judging himself immediately as soon as you back off because well, he is in a constant state of low self-confidence and always feels like he is guilty for everything that happens.

"Did I do something wrong? I'll understand if yes, I ruin everything"

Oh, it has NOTHING to do with him. Huh. A relief. But another worry then - what caused you to act this way?

"WHO MADE YOU UNHAPPY? I'LL FIND 'EM!"

After you explain the reasoning behind your behavior, he slightly relaxes but is still worried.

"Can I help somehow? Like, you want some time alone or something? Just tell me,okay?"

Will hug you and whisper "I love you" in your ear till it tickles and you laugh.

Leviathan:

Oh no, what did he do? Why did you back off?

Is it because he is too much of an otaku? HE KNEW IT

It’s not him? Huh? It’s a relief, probably. Though he is still upset about your reaction because he can’t understand it and starts to worry too.

“M-m-maybe you can explain it to me? I’m sure I can understand. I’ve been living in the shadow of my brothers, I know about such things”

Ah, he sees it now. 

He will smile brightly and hug you. “It’s okay to feel like this but I hope, together we can create a safe space for us both”.

Satan

Is slightly suprirsed, confused and a tiny bit offended.

Because well, everything was great and then... this thing happened. Did he do anything wrong? 

Because he must know so not to repeat it in the future.

He sees you are hesitant to explain but surprisingly, Satan is really patient and will not just let it go.

“Kitten, I’ve never in my life been happier than when I am with you. It’s okay sometimes we need our space but trust me, you never bore or upset me”.

Will make you some mint tea and will bring you sugar cookies while reading a book to you.

Asmodeus

To be honest, he is slightly hurt because no one ever backed off from him before.

Will become very emotional but also determined to find out the reason behind your behavior.

“Darling, but would you please come in my arms? I’d love to calm you down”.

Will stroke your hair and give you kisses on the head until you are able to explain what happened.

Is super sensitive and supportive (which is one of his greatest strengths)

“My dear, even I feel overlooked at times... Just don’t tell anyone, okay?”

Beelzebub

He has a bit of a hard time understanding such things so he will honestly have no idea what to do at first.

Like, do you wanna be alone or do you need him? Do you wanna cry or are you angry at him?

It’s really complex for Beel and he often wishes he was better at understanding both demons and humans.

He will directly ask you and will apologize for not understanding your emotions.

While he can’t fully comprehend the concept of you being selectively clingy, he will do his best to understand it in the future.

“Just share how you feel with me, okay? Like, always”

Belphegor

He won’t show it but it hurt him when you backed off.

“Maybe you can write me a note next time you decide you don’t like me anymore?”

*yeah, sarcasm is his weapon of choice when he is confused*

Will hate himself for saying that so will be double-confused since he is akward with apologies.

“Baby, I didn’t mean to... Damn! Listen, I’m sorry, I just got a bit scared and I don’t know what’s happening. Mind explaining, please?”

*yes, he is super akward with that*

Will be surprisingly patient and caring while waiting for your explanation because a) he needs to know and b) he slightly screwed up so...

“I see. We’ll work it out so no worries again, deal?”

[atlabeth]

warmth - zuko x fem!reader

summary: the two times he notices her shivering and the one time he does something about it. 

a/n: lmaoo we have been in a DROUGHT my people. i have barely given you any content this whole month and i feel bad. i wrote this out over the course of a few hours after getting the idea in the shower. i did not proofread. i am not sorry. enjoy.

and NO that end part is not dirty it is simply two kids sharing a bed for warmth bc they got cute lil crushes on each other 🔫🔫🔫🔫

wc: 1.6k 

warning(s): this is pure fluff bbbbbb 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three times. 

It happened three times before Zuko was finally able to get over himself and have a real, face to face, one on one conversation with the one person he hadn’t been able to get out of his head. 

Y/N. It was a name that had made a home in his mind, belonging to a girl that had made a home in his heart. He knew that she was a waterbender from the Northern Tribe and that she had joined the team after the Siege of the North, but apart from that, her life was a mystery to him. She was a mystery to him. 

It was pathetic. How could he become so enraptured with a girl when he didn’t even know the first thing about her? When he had spent the past couple of months fighting against her, trying everything in his power to hurt her? When she had no idea he even thought about her that way? 

Sometimes Zuko questioned himself, but then he caught a glimpse of her — the gleam of her hair, the way her eyes crinkled at the edges when she laughed, the fierceness with which she fought rivalled only by the way she cared for her injured friends afterwards — and he laughed inwardly. 

There was no way he couldn’t feel that way about her. She was simply enchanting. 

But there was only one thing he questioned more than his affections — why in the name of Agni could he not just walk up and start a conversation with her? There was no one else in the world that made him as nervous, as flushed, as completely incapable of basic speech as Y/N, and it drove him insane. 

It drove him insane that it took three times. 

~~~

The first time he noticed her shivering, it wasn’t on purpose. 

Zuko was serving tea to everyone as they gathered around the campfire, chuckling as Aang recounted one of their earlier adventures, back when he was still trying to capture the Avatar. Thinking about his past, who he used to be, was painful, but it gave him all the more reason to be thankful for where he was now. 

He wasn’t as focused on Aang’s story as he was on Y/N, though. She could hardly keep her thoughts to herself, interrupting every couple of seconds to add a detail that Aang forgot or give her own input on the events that he was describing. He started to frown as he noticed her shivering despite sitting right next to the fire — Zuko didn’t even realize how distracted he was until he felt someone hitting his arm. 

“Hey!” He was snapped out of his reverie by the harshness of Katara’s voice, angrily gesturing at the broken teacup and now spilled tea all over Haru. 

“Oh— I am so sorry,” he stammered as he crouched down and started to pick up the pieces on the ground. “Are you okay?” 

“It’s just.. really hot tea,” Haru muttered with a small wince. “No big deal.” 

“You’re right. It’s not a big deal.” Y/N raised her hand and with a small, fluid movement, she bent the liquid out of the fabric and formed it into a tiny sphere in the air. “See? Good as new. And you’re not even burnt.” 

Haru chuckled and pulled at his tunic, giving Y/N a grateful nod. 

“Can a sky bison drink tea?” She mused as she moved the liquid orb around in the air. 

“I don’t think so,” Aang said with a small laugh. 

“Shame we have to waste it.” Y/N bent it away from the group and let it fall to the ground, sinking into the rock below them. “Zuko can always make more though, right?” She said with a hopeful smile. 

“Uh, yeah. Of course.” 

“See, guys? No harm, no foul. You’re the best, Zuko.” She gave him an overexaggerated wink then began to pester Aang to get back to the story, leaving Zuko to continue handing out tea and keep his shaking hands as steady as possible. 

She really had no idea the effect she had on him. 

~~~ 

The second time? It was definitely on purpose. 

The night was unusually cold, even with the bonfire blazing in the middle, and he found his eyes trained once more on Y/N. This time she was the storyteller, giving them all a taste of Northern Water Tribe culture as she recounted a bedtime story she was told as a child. She had a whole arsenal of character voices at her disposal, keeping everyone thoroughly entertained despite the numerous lines she forgot. Zuko didn’t even realize he was staring until Sokka elbowed him in the elbow, gesturing at her with a nod of his head and a cocky grin. 

“What are you doing, just gawking at her like that?” 

“Wh— gawking? I am not gawking. I’m— I’m just listening to her.” 

“Yeah, sure. But I’m pretty sure Appa could start talking right now and you wouldn’t notice because you are hopelessly into her.” He gestured at Zuko’s eyes with his hand then in Y/N’s direction. “Gawking.” 

“I— I am not!” He protested, tearing his eyes away from Y/N’s animated face to give Sokka one of his signature glares. He lowered his voice to a whisper to ensure that no one would hear them. “I’m not into her, I’m not gawking, I am appreciating her storytelling.” 

“Uh huh, yeah.” Sokka looked at her and grinned before glancing back at Zuko. “If you’re not into her, then I can ask her out, right?” 

Zuko didn’t respond, simply kept glaring at him in hopes that it would intimidate him into backing down so he wouldn’t have to say anything and risk embarrassing himself. 

Sokka chuckled and held up his hands. “Alright, geez, I’m just joking. But maybe use some of that fire to keep it going? Looks like she’s cold.” 

Almost immediately, he broke eye contact and fueled the fire with a simple blast. Y/N shot him a grateful smile and nodded as she continued her story, and Zuko noticed her hands falling back down into her lap from their former place on her arms. 

No amount of fire could’ve caused as much warmth as her smile. He was sure of that. 

~~~

There was no way he could miss it the third time. After all, she was the only one there. 

Zuko hadn’t been able to sleep so he ended up outside, and there she was — sitting there, all alone in the middle of the temple grounds, shivering quietly with a moonless night sky as her backdrop. Before he could second guess himself, Zuko started walking over. 

“Hey.” Y/N greeted him without even looking up as she pulled her arms around herself, bringing her legs up to her chest in an effort to conserve all the warmth she could. 

“Hey.” Zuko took a seat on the ground next to her and crossed his legs. “Are you cold?” 

She let out an airy chuckle and nodded. “Strange, isn’t it? I grow up surrounded by snow and ice and I’m perfectly fine, but after a few months away a couple of breezes are tearing me down. I don’t get it.” 

“You’ve been shivering a lot lately,” he said after a beat of silence. Y/N raised an eyebrow and gave him a wry smile. 

“What, have you been looking?”

That sent him stammering. “I-I— yes? I mean— no, I’ve noticed, but I’m not actively looking at you, that’s weird, I’m not— I mean—”

Y/N threw her head back and laughed, the same laugh that sent flutter bats through his stomach and made his heart burst with happiness. She set her hand on his and squeezed, giving him a gentle look that almost immediately ceased his rambling. “Zuko, it’s alright. It’s… nice that you’ve noticed. Like you’re looking out for me or something.” 

He opened his mouth to respond but couldn’t find his voice — he was sure his cheeks were as red as his tunic, just at the simple touch of her hand — and it only got worse as she placed her other hand on top of it. 

“You’re warm,” Y/N muttered. “Like… intensely warm.”

“Is that bad?” He wondered aloud, preemptively panicking. “Do you want me to turn it off? I can’t turn it off, but I could find a way somehow—” 

“Thank you,” she interrupted with another small laugh, “but no. I don’t need you to uh, turn off your firebending. That already happened once. But you’re adorable to think of me like that.” 

The two of them stared into each other’s eyes, the air between them heavy with something she couldn’t quite place. Y/N pursed her lips and bit back a growing smile as she glanced at the ground. 

“This is, uh… really helping. With the cold, I mean. And I was… I guess I was just…” Another laugh. “I was just wondering if you’d maybe want to spend the night with me? Just because my room is especially freezing, and you’re so warm, and I think I would sleep a lot better if I—”

Now it was his turn to interrupt her rambling. There was something about her getting so flustered about him in the same way he did around her that made this easier. “I’d love to.”

“Great,” she breathed, the same smile from before returning just a little bit brighter. Y/N stood up and they began their walk back into the temple, hands still intertwined, warmth emanating between the two of them. 

Three times. 

Two strikes. 

One success. 

And that was all he needed.  

[auroracalisto]

for the first time

summary: the reader finally sees her life in a new point of view, thanks to carlisle, who has helped her with her abusive husband, her baby girl luna, and her life in general.  

pairing: carlisle x female! married/widowed! abused! reader

word count: 1.6k words

warnings: female reader, married and eventually widowed reader, reader is abused by her husband, reader has the surname Wolf in this bc comedic reasons, reader has a child named Luna by said husband, mentions of murder, no depictions but carlisle definitely did the stabby stab (at least if that’s what you wanna assume he did), uhhh reader got them widow benefits by the end but that’s a story for another time, ALSO for some reason i put this in the year 2005 and it goes on to 2006/2007?  so this would technically be the same timeline as bella and edward meeting.  so first movie.  yes.  i love the technicalities of everything.  honestly didn’t mean for it to happen but it did so 

a/n: i have no words

Carlisle first had the honor of meeting you at your then-husband’s Christmas party.  It was December 20th, 2005.  Your child was most definitely due by the end of January.  You were quite literally glowing, and Carlisle believed you were the most beautiful thing he had seen in some time.  However, most of the beauty was because of your skill with makeup.  Without it, bruises galore would be revealed to the outside world, and your husband would not be too happy to find out that you showed off the newest shiner he gave to you. 

Even while pregnant, he did not care for your wellbeing.  Hell, he made it quite obvious that he would never care for the little girl growing in your midsection.  But even if he was a terrible prick, you decided to have this child.  Of course, maybe it would have been better for you to end the pregnancy early on.  However, a part of you didn’t want that.  A part of you wanted to have the baby and leave your husband.  Whichever order it came in would be fine.  But knowing now that it would be the latter made you nervous.  

The second time Carlisle saw you was in the middle of a grocery store, calming down your newborn baby.  Your husband had sent you out in the middle of February, just a month after giving birth.  You were alone, and everything was upsetting.  Your baby’s little cries caused your own tears to well up in your eyes.  

When the two of you made eye contact, you finally broke.  You didn’t want anyone to see you like that, and yet, here you were with your husband’s co-worker, crying in the middle of the bread aisle.  

“Mrs. Wolf, please.  Let me help you,” Carlisle softly said, leaving his buggy on the other side of you.  He came over, looking at your baby.  “I’ll get her to calm down.”

You took his word for it, allowing Carlisle to comfort your crying child.  “Please.  Don’t call me that.  [Your name] is fine.”

He watched you with soft eyes and nodded.  “And who is this?” he softly asked, looking down at the fussing infant.  Her eyes were shut and she never once had actual tears—one thing that never sat right with him was how babies couldn’t form tears until they were about two months old (sometimes even longer).  

“Luna,” you softly spoke, watching as your little girl started to calm down in his arms.  You sniffled softly, wiping your eyes with the back of your sleeve.  You should have been more careful, but you didn’t care at this point.  It was getting harder and harder to do this; if someone saw a bruise, someone saw a bruise.  

“That’s a beautiful name,” Carlisle spoke, looking back at you.  “She is very lucky to have you as a mother.”

By the third time Carlisle had properly talked to you, your husband had died.  Under mysterious circumstances, but he was gone.  And you couldn’t have been happier.  You had an idea of what had happened.  Especially when you once opened your eyes in the middle of the night to see a flash of blond hair.  But you drifted off back to sleep, not thinking anymore of it until the morning after when your husband was missing.  However, you never once said anything.  

Weeks after he had passed, you had hired a babysitter for the evening.  Carlisle’s two girls.  

And for once, you did not have to worry about the makeup covering your bruises.  In fact, you wore your makeup how you liked it instead of having to wear it to protect your dead husband.  You found yourself sitting in your car, in front of the hospital.  Alice had informed you that her adoptive father was currently at work—that he was constantly working, and he never once took a break.  

Maybe you should have just turned around.  Maybe you should have just left Washington, altogether.  But your legs started moving before you could stop them.  And once you saw Carlisle, you knew that you had to speak with him.  

You didn’t even have to say hello to him for the man to walk in your direction.  He smiled kindly at you, and you wanted to say something.  You desperately wanted to thank him for saving you, even if he never admitted it.  

But the words never found your tongue.  Your arms wrapped around the doctor, your face buried deep in his blue dress shirt and his white lab coat.  Carlisle had never been more grateful for not carrying his clipboard around.  He wrapped his arms around your body, holding you close.  

Although the two of you never said anything, one thing was clear; you were both grateful for each other’s existence.  Even if you lived vicariously through passing glances and thoughtful actions.  

Luna was nearly one by the time you decided enough was enough.  You were a widow, now.  You did not have to worry about what your husband would say.  And one thing was certain; the blond-haired doctor had your heart in more ways than one.  

He was so kind to you, always offering help and joyful smiles.  His conversations carried you through your long days and kept you awake at night as you thought of how you could tell him how you truly felt.  

But now, you knew enough was enough—you knew that you were not getting any younger, and neither was Carlisle (of course, because he was human—of course, you wouldn’t learn that until later).  You needed to talk to him.  You needed to take a course of action.  

You grabbed your keys, walking to your door.  Luna was babbling in her car seat.  You sat it down to get the door open, nearly jumping out of your skin when you saw Carlisle standing there, prepared to knock.  

He had a bouquet of your favorite flowers in hand and a rather awkward smile.  

“My apologies... are you going somewhere?”

Your cheeks began to burn.  You sat your keys on the table beside your door, shaking your head.  “I was going to see you, actually.”

Luna giggled up at the man when he came into her line of vision.  She adored Carlisle.  

“Oh, that makes this easier then,” he let out a soft laugh, hesitantly holding out the flowers to you.  “These are for you.  I... I had asked Alice what your favorites were.  I hope you don’t mind.”

You smiled.  “No...  No, I don’t,” you said, clearing your throat.  You moved out of the doorway so that he could come into your house.  “I was hoping that.. well, I am hoping this now.  I’ve needed to talk to you.  For a while now.  I really, really need to just get this off my chest, you know?  I just—”

“—could I be of any assistance?” he chuckled softly.  “Perhaps I can find the words that you are searching for.”

You rolled your eyes, unable to keep your smile from forming.  “Carlisle, I’ve... loved you since before my husband died.  I know that for a fact, now.  And I... hope that you feel the same way.  About myself.  And Luna.  We’re a package deal, you know.”

He chuckled softly and nodded.  “I know that you are a package deal.  I... am very glad you feel that way, too.”

“Too?”

“Yes,” Carlisle smiled at you.  “I have loved you since the first time I have set eyes on you.”

You snorted out a laugh, crossing your arms over your chest.  “That long, huh?”

He just smiled, watching you with kind, golden eyes.  “There are many things I need to tell you, [Your name],” he said, finally shutting the front door behind of him.  He looked down at Luna and got her out of the carrier, especially when she happily reached for the man.  “Perhaps we can take this evening to talk?”

You smiled, nodding.  “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, but yeah.  I’d like that.”

All of you made Carlisle’s beatless heart skip.  He could only hope that it was the opposite for you (he could definitely hear how fast your heart began to beat the closer he got to you).  Luna entertained herself with the buttons on Carlisle’s shirt while the two of you talked until she fell asleep against him.  

Perhaps it was that moment that you truly knew that you were in love with Carlisle.  No—that action only fortified your love for the man.  You knew you had loved him just as long as he had claimed to love you.  And for once, you were not afraid of what love could do. 

Because you believed you loved your deceased husband, you married him.  You slowly watched him become a horrible person.  And then you had Luna with him.  Of course, that was the one good thing that came out of him.  Perhaps the chance of meeting Carlisle as well.  

But you knew that now, the love you felt for Carlisle was as real as the infant in Carlisle’s arms.  And it would never burn like your last loveless love.  

For the first time, it felt like you were seeing yourself in a new light.  You were seeing everything from a different perspective.  And Carlisle allowed that.  Carlisle helped you find that.  

Even if he hadn’t have been there, you would have still found it.  However, you knew that he made it so much easier than it would have been.  

For the first time, you knew real love.  With Luna, and now with Carlisle.  

Despite everything that had happened to you, it seemed as though the universe was finally connecting the dots.  And you couldn’t wait to see what she was going to give you, next.  

[sukifans]

zuko + 7. ( a kiss on the eye lid ) pls? thank you <33

campcampie said: hey! i’d like to request a kinda modern day zuko x reader where they’re going on their first date and they’ve been friends for like ever using prompt 24 from the 50 types of kisses? if you don’t have time that’s completely fine

LAST FIRST DATE // zuko

WC: 2.4k

PROMPT: “a kiss on the eyelid” & “deep kisses where they have their hands tangled in each other’s hair to pull them closer”

WARNINGS: say goodbye to ur teeth

A/N: hi loves! i hope you don’t mind, but i combined these two requests bc i thought they’d just be super cute together :^) i made it extra long since it’s two requests in one. thank you for sending them in!! we love tooth-rotting fluff here

⇦ 𝘔𝘈𝘚𝘛𝘌𝘙𝘓𝘐𝘚𝘛

It was the only time you had ever felt like this before a first date. You didn’t look him up to check if he had an arrest record, or turn on location sharing with your friends, or repeat conversation starters like a mantra in your head. You didn’t schedule an “emergency phone call” as a graceful way to bow out. You didn’t do any of these things, because you knew you didn’t need to. Your pulse didn’t race in your neck out of nerves, but excitement.

You tried on all your clothes in every possible combination, all of which he’d seen you in before. You fixed your hair one way, then changed your mind, then put it back again. It all either felt like too little for such a blind leap or too much for such a natural step. How was it possible that everything and yet nothing might change today?

Okay, so maybe you were a little nervous. You tried not to focus on how wobbly you felt when you went to answer the knock on your door, but it all melted away at the sight of your best friend standing on your porch with a half-wilted bouquet of your favorite flowers. When he caught sight of you his lips turned up into a sheepish grin, his cheeks already going pink.

“Hi,” you said, much quieter than you’d intended.

“Hey,” he exhaled. “You look... beautiful.”

Now your face was starting to feel hot. “Zuko, you’ve seen me wear this before.”

“So?” He crossed the threshold into your home when you stepped aside to let him in. “You always looking amazing. You could make a burlap sack look designer.”

“Oh, hush.” You accepted the fleeting peck he placed on your lips. It was something you’d done a million times before in greeting or goodbye—yeah, you’d been more than friends without being “more than friends” for some time now—but there was a new electric anticipation to the familiar gesture and it made your heart palpitate. Trying to calm yourself, you fixed your eyes on the flowers he held in an almost white-knuckle grip. “Are those for me?”

He looked down at his hand as if surprised he was carrying a bouquet. “Oh, yeah.” You took it when he thrusted it out at you. “I, uh, saw them at the store and they reminded me of you. They’re your favorite, you know.”

“I know,” you giggled, moving to rustle through your cabinets to find something to put them in. Redness crept up his neck from under the collar of his shirt and he grimaced.

“Right, of course you do.” He looked at you apologetically. “I’m sorry they’re not as pretty anymore. I... got a little excited when I saw them and bought them on the spot a few days ago. I probably should’ve waited.”

“I think they’re beautiful,” you said, filling a jar with water and setting them in place. “Thank you; you didn’t have to.”

“I know. And I knew you’d say that,” he chuckled. He took your hand when you stood in front of him once again. “I just want to make sure I do this right. You deserve to be... wooed, or whatever.”

“Well, consider me wooed.” You squeezed his hand. “I’m happy no matter what, as long as I’m with you.”

The soft, sweet look he fixed you with made you want to melt into a puddle. God, you were head over heels for this man. It was unbelievable how long it took for you to realize and actually do something about it. Everything felt so obvious now—the years of feelings you’d swallowed back like bitter medicine despite how he’d clearly been doing the exact same thing; the ache of yearning in your chest and the burning jealousy that rose like bile in your throat every time you saw him with someone else.

But none of that mattered anymore, because you were here now, with him, sitting in his passenger seat with the windows down and trying to goad him into singing along to the stereo with you. You held his free hand that wasn’t on the wheel in yours, forcing his arm to dance along with you. He watched your antics out of the corner of his eye with a smitten half-smile. You were satisfied when he tapped his fingers against the wheel along with the rhythm pumping from the speakers and bobbed his head. You swore you could even hear him humming when you leaned in close enough while swaying in your seat.

The date had been your idea, because of course it was—you knew him better than just about anybody else, especially himself and maybe even his Uncle Iroh. Your sharp perceptiveness and ability to read him like a book had unnerved him at first, early in your friendship as awkward, angsty teens. He didn’t like the concept of being known and analyzed; uncomfortable with the idea of existing in other people’s minds in a form beyond his control. That always led to expectations, and expectations led to disappointment.

Learning how to be okay with his own vulnerability and personhood was one of many things you had helped him with over the years of your relationship. Because of you—for you—he was a better person, a better friend, a better man. It was something he wished he knew how to thank you for. Even if he could find the words (and the nerve), it would never be enough. He had settled long ago on just trying to show you, every day and in every way he could.

As the two of you traipsed across the park grass and you searched for the perfect spot, he couldn’t help but marvel at the fact his hands seemed to be designed to hold yours. The way your fingers fitted perfectly between his, the warmth of every contact point between your palms; it felt as natural as the tides or the winds or anything else that had always been and always would be. He’d experienced the feeling of your hand in his hundreds if not thousands of times before, but it all felt so much more... poignant, somehow, in this time and place.

“You’ve been really quiet,” you observed as you laid out the blanket once you’d deemed the area suitable. He sat on it next to you, dropping down the backpack of snacks he’d been carrying. “Are you okay? Is something wrong?”

“No, definitely not,” he quickly reassured you, wanting the worried crease between your eyebrows to smooth away. “I’m fine. I’ve just been thinking.”

You nodded, not pressing him. That was just one more of a million things he adored about you: you never forced him to tell you things he didn’t want to say. This, however, was something he wanted to share with you.

“I’ve been thinking about how important you are to me, and how lucky I am to have you in my life. And how... easy this feels.”

You quirked an eyebrow. “Easy?”

“Yeah. In a really, really good way. I feel like this is exactly where I’m supposed to be. Even if this doesn’t really work out the way we want it to, you still mean everything to me. I can’t even imagine who or where I would be if I hadn’t met you.” He spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully. Taking in a deep breath, he continued. “I think about it a lot, actually, but I guess I’m just... thinking about it more, now.”

Your lips curved up into that gentle smile that made his heart skip a few beats and you squeezed his hand. “I know exactly what you mean, Zuko. I feel the same way and I couldn’t’ve said it better myself.” The tips of his ears burned when you leaned over to press a kiss to his cheek. He mumbled something incoherent under his breath, rubbing the back of his neck, and you giggled at his sudden shyness. He cleared his throat and looked over at the raised stage a little ways away.

“Um, I think the show is starting.” You followed his gaze up to where stagehands were setting up props for the play. The crowd of people hushed as the lights illuminated the stage and orchestral music flowed from the speakers. His stomach flipped when you shifted closer to him and turned your head so your lips brushed his earlobe.

“I’ve heard this troupe is better than the Ember Island Players, but if they’re not I packed some tomatoes to throw,” you whispered before burying your face in his shoulder to stifle your laugh at his scoff in response.

“If they’re worse than the Ember Island Players then consider this our first and last date. I don’t think any relationship could recover from that,” he mumbled and you rolled your eyes with a grin.

“Harsh, but understandable,” you sighed. You rooted around in the bag and pulled out the bottle of cheap wine you’d slipped in. You passed it to him after taking a swig, a devilish smirk on your face that made goosebumps rise on his skin. He took a sip just as the first actors entered the stage.

They were much better than the Ember Island Players, though that was a pretty low bar to set. As much of a theater snob he could be, he had to admit they did Love Amongst the Dragons justice (and even brought some tears to his eyes that he hastily blinked away in hopes you wouldn’t notice). The sun had set long before you both rose with the rest of the crowd to give the troupe a standing ovation. He could feel his heart swell with adoration as you clapped and whistled enthusiastically, the lights on the crowd making the tear tracks on your face glisten.

“That was amazing!” You turned to him breathlessly, eyes sparkling. The wine you’d shared was making him feel bold (and a little wobbly) and the way you looked at him was making the blood rush in his ears. Without thinking he slid his palms under your jaw and leaned in to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. After your initial moment of surprise you closed your eyes and twisted your hands into the front of his shirt, pulling him against your body as you kissed him back insistently. A jolt shot up your spine when his tongue prodded at your mouth and you parted your lips, humming as you tilted your head to deepen the kiss.

“Zuko,” you breathed against his lips, pulling away just far enough to gasp for air.

“(Y/N).” Your name rolled off his tongue like a reverent prayer. His hands slipped down to your waist where he dug his fingertips into your skin, as if afraid you’d dematerialize if he didn’t hold you in place.

“Are we spinning? It feels like we’re spinning.”

“No,” he chuckled. “I think we had too much wine.”

“It’s not the wine.” You opened your eyes to see his were still squeezed shut. He was afraid that he’d open them and wake up and it would all have been a dream.

“I’m pretty sure it is.”

“No—“ you cupped his face and tilted it so you could press a kiss to his forehead, and another to each cheek, and then one brushed over the rough skin on his scarred eyelid that made his breathe catch in his throat “—you always make me feel like that.”

He opened his eyes now, cheeks flushed a blazing red. He drank in the sight of your wide eyes and kiss-swollen lips and felt his heart leap into his throat. You felt captivated by his hungry gaze; he was staring at you like a man starved. “Sorry,” he mumbled breathlessly.

You weren’t expecting that. “Sorry? For what?”

“Making you feel... spinny.”

You giggled and pulled him in for another kiss, threading your fingers of one hand through his shaggy black locks while the thumb of your other skimmed across his scar. He raised his own to tangle in your hair, tugging you impossibly closer. Your foot caught on the blanket and you stumbled, bringing you both crashing to the ground as your faces smacked together. Surely you two were a sight to see for the people filtering out of the park now that the play was over.

“Fuck,” you groaned, rubbing the bridge of your nose where his chin had slammed against it. He grunted and propped himself up so he wasn’t laying on top of you anymore.

“That was definitely the wine,” he said and you nodded in agreement. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” You dropped your head back into the grass and scrunched up your face. “Your chin hurt my nose.”

He leaned over you with a grin. “Well, your nose hurt my chin.”

“Oh, my apologies. Didn’t even consider how your bony chin could be injured after smashing into my soft cartilage.” You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore how his huff of laughter made your stomach feel fluttery.

“Just try to keep it in mind next time. This time, though—“ he gently kissed between your eyes, then the bridge of your nose, then the tip “—I’ll kiss it better for you.” He reveled in how you visibly flustered, opening your mouth and then closing it again quickly.

“Dork,” you muttered and he laughed again. “The hell do you mean, ‘next time?’”

“Well, y’know, if we keep falling for each other, then—“ You cut him off with an exasperated groan.

“If I didn’t know better I’d think Sokka gave you the idea to purposefully fall, just to drop that stupid line.”

“I mean, he did offer to help since I always seem to trip over my words around you.” You made a disgusted face in response to his cheeky smile and shoved him off you. He rolled onto his back next to you as you sat up.

“I should’ve seen that coming,” you grumbled.

“Yeah,” he sighed, obviously pleased with himself. You looked down at him when he tugged on your sleeve. “Hey, Sokka’s tips didn’t ruin my chance at a second date, right?”

You took his hand in yours and laced your fingers together. “As if I’d let Sokka’s stupid ass fuck up the years of pining I’ve put in. You’ll have to try harder than that to get rid of me, Zuko.”

You could feel his smile against your skin when he brought your knuckles to his lips. “That’s what I like to hear.”

ATLA TAGS: @hotgirlazula @octophopi @simpinforsukka @protect-remus @akiris @sunflowerazula @wooscottoncandyhair @chewymoustachio

ZUKO TAGS: @fiantomartell @avatarayeaye @hypercakeiii @sher-lockedmarvel @sunflowerr-mami @emeraldpotato @september-ctd @duh-dobrik

[dirtypedrocharacterconfessions]

This isn't really a confession, I've been wanting to get this off my chest for the longest time and I think this is the best place to do so; I really liked Whiskey in the first half of the movie but when he showed that he wanted to kill all substance (ab)users my heart shattered. I know Pedro himself would never think that way of anyone but I still couldn't and still struggle to look at Whiskey. One of my parents abused alcohol, one of my siblings abused coke, an uncle abused heavier drugs, I myself am recently out of rehab for meth and coke abuse so do you get what I mean? I never asked for family tragedies and poverty nor did I pull the trigger on his wife in the context of the movie. It just shatters me completely, especially when NOBODY seems to be talking about this. At least not that I've seen. Everyone's on about how sad Whiskey's life has been and yes what happened is awful, but as a recently sober individual (who was struggling to STAY in rehab and not relapse when the movie came out) I absolutely HATE that nobody talks about this. At least in the fics I've seen in my attempts to not panic every time I see Whiskey, nobody seems to write his s/o as sharing his logic. Also sir alcohol is just as bad as most drugs even if it's legal wha-

I just wish someone would write a fic where Whiskey's s/o calls him out on his bullshit plan or better yet, reveals their blue veins to him because they're struggling with demons that they can't beat alone and they use drugs to shut them up for a brief moment in the night when they can't sleep. He needs therapy not only bc of his dead wife but also because trying to commit mass murder against people who (ab)use drugs is fucked up.

I was extremely happy when the fucker got minced to death even though he's a Pedro character. I didn't lose friends and family to drugs and alcohol because I wanted to nor did I kill them with my own hands.

Sorry for the heavy ass topic, I just felt like I'd burst if I didn't say anything and I don't want to make a public post and get harassed by the portion of Pedro fans who are unfortunately rather ignorant. Btw I'm an afro-latin trans guy and will try to save money for hormonal treatment and possibly surgery later on, so hey to all fellow poc and trans fans who feel alone here😭

I'm obviously not gonna publish this as a confession because it's fucking important. You're right! And you're completely valid for being uncomfortable regarding his character! The beliefs he expresses in the movie are fucked up! And deeply flawed! Before the admission of the whole situation with his wife, he does also mention something about Statesman stock prices skyrocketing, which is insane to me, too, because Wow how groundbreaking you're continuing to profit off of human suffering way to go

Anyway. It's easy for fic writers (like myself!) to take his character and change his story to get rid of all of that, but it definitely doesn't change to the effect of the movie canon on people who watched it. I think no one wants to talk about it because it makes them uncomfortable. Why? Either because they agree with him and don't want to say it because they know that it won't go over well, or they know he's wrong and would rather ignore that part of his character or write it out altogether than accept that maybe he's just a shitty person. (Granted, the nice thing about fiction is that no one's gonna get punished for rewriting a character, but I still think this is an important conversation to have.)

I'm not an addict, and I'm lucky enough to have grown up in a family where substance abuse and alcoholism was never a problem (while I was conscious, anyway, my grandpa is a recovered alcoholic but hasn't been drinking for decades & he doesn't talk about it much), so I don't really have an opinion on how this all effects people because it... doesn't really effect me, personally. Nonetheless it frustrates me that society treats addiction (or even just using certain drugs recreationally) as a moral issue when it isn't.

Anyway, I'm proud of you for getting the help you needed! And thank you for sharing this. I know for some people it's not the easiest topic to talk about. (also trans high five my dude)

[pyrefell]

Helllo!!! I’m loving your headcanons so far!!!

Do you have any general personalities descriptions for your boys yet?

a of all, bsdaifjkbfjkowp thank you!!! b of all, im sorry this took so long?? i rewrote it like 3 times & it still might change bc im indecisive. also it turned into a lil bit of a headcanon post. i hope its understandable?

once again i am struck with the fact that the boys need nicknames. hmm.

UNDERTALE:

Sans: Guy who is deliberately and unabashedly Cringe. Overall, fairly laid back. However, he still prefers to maintain distance between himself and most people. It was already a natural facet of his personality but it was exacerbated by the Timeline Jank. People tend to forget he’s as smart as he is, they don’t think he’s stupid, they just mostly know that funnyman side of him. If you're a dick to Papyrus, he's gonna be a dick to you.  

Papyrus: Things are so exciting and fascinating to him, even the most mundane things. Despite seeming completely oblivious to things that seem completely obvious, he's very smart and deceptively cunning. Even though he knows how people see him (a big loud child) and he doesn't get quite the reception his brother does, he knows he'll win them over one day! He tries to avoid thinking about how lonely he actually is. It’s fine. He knows Sans is dealing with something (he won’t tell him what) but he figures he doesn’t need much else on his plate.

UNDERSWAP:

Sans: In this post, I mentioned that he's kind of always naturally been the more outgoing brother and that he's taken on this much more outgoing and bubbly persona as a result of the impact the timelines have had on him. He's competitive in a more aggressive way (maybe not quite the right word to use but), by which I mean he's kind of a sore loser sometimes. Also? He's a huge flirt, he's pretty skilled in the art of flustering.

Papyrus: Also in this post, I said that he's pretty chill until the conversation turns to something he's passionate about, then he reaches True Papyrus Volume Levels (and Chaos Levels). He is fairly relaxed, yes, but part of it is compensating for how awkward he can be. He gets embarrassed really easy, even something as small as misunderstanding something that was said. However! He’s a pretty popular artist online! Though he uses a pseudonym, being recognized and talked to by a stranger in public is not something he would look forward to.

UNDERFELL:

Sans: He’s cruel and crude, that’s kind of his whole thing. He’s not really the best at keeping a hold on his temper (though there’s a few other factors at play there). Keeping up the whole tough guy persona is the number one priority thus he doesn’t deal much with his emotions or inner turmoil or any of that other crap. Like US!Sans, he’s a flirt, except his flirting is mostly crude comments and jokes. And yet, somehow it works? Guy who is a disaster. He’s oddly nostalgic, mostly about his relationship with Papyrus. He wishes he could have been a better brother, but it seems like their relationship is too far gone.

Papyrus: He also doesn’t have the best control of his temper but he has an image to keep, one of a cruel and cold Royal Guard Captain. He didn’t used to be like this, but it’s necessary for his survival. He’s still surprisingly empathetic, something that could never really be beat out of him. HUGE perfectionist nearly to the point of it being debilitating. He oscillates between hating how weak he is and desperately wanting to be able to be weak. While he acts prideful about his ‘work’ int the Royal Guard, he is genuinely prideful about things like his cooking. Often to the point of arrogance.

SWAPFELL:

Sans: He’s seen as very cold and calculating, well-spoken. But he also knows when and how to turn on the charm. That’s how he’s even made it this far in life, it’s vital to his survival. He can also be very prideful, particularly in his position as Queen Toriel’s right hand and in his ability to remain cool in high stress situations. He’s well aware of how overprotective he is with Papyrus, he’s terrified of how cruel the world is and terrified that he’s stunted him to the point of not being able to cope with it.

Papyrus: He’s deathly shy. If it were safe/a good idea to use his own brand of shortcuts to get out of situations, by god would he. He, like his non-Fell counterpart, thrives in the relative anonymity of being online. Past that barrier of shyness, he’s excitable and surprisingly jovial. He tries to find some reason to be at least content, he thinks it helps Sans worry less (even if it doesn’t really). He’s actually pretty mischievous, though only dares to pull pranks on his brother.

HORRORTALE:

Sans: Horribly cynical and jaded. He’s working on it, even if he doesn’t particularly want to sometimes. He’s not home, so to speak, most of the time. He’s easily frustrated by the gaps in his memory, then he forgets why he’s frustrated and gets even more upset. He’s naturally very wary of everyone else and again, very much prefers to keep distance between himself and most everyone he comes into contact with.

Papyrus: He definitely tries to hide everything behind a happy demeanor, he tries to fix everything for just about anyone (especially his brother) without any fuss and tries to make it seem like he’s totally fine. There’s also this sense of jadedness, he tries to curb it but sometimes it still slips out. He still tries to act like himself, like he’d been before the Famine, but it’s exhausting and he’ll eventually come to terms with the fact that he’s no longer the same.

HORRORSWAP:

Sans: His competitive nature has morphed more into him being more of an aggressive hothead (though not quite to the level of UF!Sans). He’s really self-conscious about his new stutter and bringing it up frustrates him the same way treating him like a child had before. He has terrible mood swings, he can ruin his own day over nothing and it kills him. He’s really trying to get better, but he still has a hard time being honest with people.

Papyrus: He’s gotten pretty cynical since the Famine, he puts part of the blame on himself (if only he'd just been brave for once), even though he knows there's not really a whole lot he could have done. He’s even quieter than he used to be, he’d prefer if he could just fade into the background. He hates how much he stands out in any crowd and tries to avoid going out at all costs. The only one who can get him out is Sans because at least they can ignore everyone else and concern themselves with each other.

HORRORFELL:

Sans: He’s...mean. Like. He tends to be a major jackass. He can’t help but think well, humans aren’t exactly gonna wanna know a monster, much less him. And hey! Might just help keep his newly expanded family safe! He ain’t complainin’! He’s really just bitter about how things have gone for him and his brother (and about how things will likely go in the future). For as many dark jokes he makes to Frisk and Aliza, he’d be the first one to come to their rescue, he’s just that kind of friend.

Papyrus: He’s fairly quiet these days, but don’t think he’s not going to find some way to give you some kind of attitude. He’s been putting a lot of work into taming his anger, which is no small task considering everything. He still has his moments, but he prides himself in being able to cool off and keep himself somewhat calm. He still hasn’t been able to do much about his perfectionism, in fact it’s gotten worse, but he’s trying. And he, like his brother, is extremely protective of his little family, and god help anyone who dares try anything.

A B-Bonus????

UF!Comic Papyrus: (he’s the only one with a nickname...lol) Reggie here struggles a lot with who he is as a person, is he more Sans? More Papyrus? An even 50/50? Or is he someone else entirely? He’s introspective and hyper aware of his mannerisms, particularity in the ones he deems too Sans-like or too Papyrus-like. He’s not exactly the nicest, partially as a mechanism to keep people away (it’s just...easier that way). Reggie keeps to himself most of the time. He’s not shy though, he’s more than willing to speak his mind, even if it comes out more crass than it was intended.

[kim-ruzek]

It’s been a week since the finales and while I’m over the moon about fire, I’m still so conflicted over pd, specifically Adam and how he talked to Kevin.

I know they’re brothers and the show will have them get over this, but if my white friend said what Adam did? I wouldn’t look at them the same way. I’d lose a lot of love/respect that I had for them.

And a lot of people (of a certain color) are saying it’s not a big deal because of the situation? But like those are his real thoughts, his filter is just gone. Maybe I’m just being too sensitive tho.

I’d love to hear your take on this. If your comfortable sharing it.

I've been thinking of this ask all day, of how to answer it. Because honestly, I have SO many thoughts on this, but I was debating if I should say them all or just sum up but I decided that I'm just gonna speak my mind!!

I, too, have a lot of complexed and conflicting thoughts over this. And I have to say, with stuff like this, with racial issues, you can NEVER be too sensitive.

Firstly, I agree. Kev and Adam are brothers, and the show will have them get over this, it wouldn't be realistic otherwise. But I really do hope they do it in a good, believable and decent way. Because I also agree with what you said about if my white friend said that shit? A little bit of my love and respect for them would be forever tarnished-- at least until I see some REAL improvement, which would take a minimum of a year to properly heal.

This fandom is a real good fandom, but yeah, I HAVE seen a lot of white fans not treating this like the big deal it is. The majority DO accept it's a big deal, but at the same time, they don't seem to truly get just how big, like how they think Kevin and Adam will have to move on from this is quite watered down.

Now, where I stand:

I watched cpd for Kim, Adam and Kev. I got into it for Burzek, and fell so hard in love with Kevin immediately. So when Kevin and Adam fight, I find it really hard because they're my boys! But it's necessary, and I think will help them become even more tight once Adam gets his head screwed on straight.

I do agree that they're his "real thoughts", but my take is that it's a little more complicated than that. Like Adam is a bit of a hothead, and that moment? He was more scared than he's ever been, and Kev, in his mind, is the only other person who loves Kim as much so when Kev did what Adam took as a "betrayal", Adam was angry. And that was shitty. And he should be accountable for that, AND for what he said.

But I think calling them his real thoughts is a little simplistic. They're thoughts that's going to be in his mind a lot, obviously, because Adam doesn't fully get this. So there's two layers to this:

One: People say things out of anger. I've got a temper, and I keep it under control obviously, but it's there, and when you're angry, especially betrayed and hurt, you just want to hurt people the same way you are. And when it's someone you really, really love? You say things you have maybe thought when you were a little annoyed but rationality won and reminded you it's a stupid thought, things that you KNOW will hurt.

And I think that's what this was. Obviously you do this, no matter what the reason, you need to fucking apologize and grovel. Like I'm not saying you shouldn't because I really don't think that. Especially as someone who's said really hurtful things out of anger, I PASSIONATELY believe that you should be held to a high standard about your actions. Because anger is not good, it's an ugly emotion, and you have to fight it.

Two: I definitely think those things are stuff Adam has thought before. I mean, thoughts in anger rarely appears out of nowhere, they're there in the background. But this isn't necessary a bad thing, or makes Adam a bad person. Like we ALL have less than nice thoughts, it's human nature.

And for Adam, he tries, he really does, but the man just Does Not Get all the deep complexities of the police reform. So I think his stance is, he doesn't get it, but he goes along. There's been those times he's argued, but I think most of the time when he's confused, he kinda just...has one of those thoughts but doesn't express it because he KNOWS it's more complicated than that, even if he doesn't understand it.

So when Kevin and Adam fought, Adam got ANGRY, because he felt scared and betrayed, and that's when he voiced all these thoughts he's thought before but kept inside because even though he doesn't understand why or how, he knows it's more complicated. But he was angry because Kim was in danger, and suddenly, it didn't seem logical or rational to keep by book.

Okay so now I've said that, onto what I think this means and how I want this go moving forward.

Adam was a jerk. What he said to Kevin was such a low blow, and things are going to be fractured between those two. And I think nothing Adam feels towards Kev has changed, but I do think they'll be that little emptiness in Kev, because hearing your white best friend say that? Ugh. Pain.

In a general sense, I think they'll be fine. But they can't be as close as they were, without Kevin feeling some sort of distance without any closure.

So in season nine, we definitely need our boys to have a conversation. And not just one, but several. And we need to see Adam make some actual changes to his beliefs. Not just half assing it bc he knows he's wrong even if he doesn't understand the complexities of why, but actually challenging his own beliefs and learning.

I think one of my main problems with this fandom (the white fans) is how much emphasis is put on both Adam and Kev seeking each other out to have a conversation. That's just wrong-- Adam should be the one. None of this, fixing this, educating Adam is on this is NOT in any way, shape or form is on Kevin.

What Adam said is hurtful, and I think Kevin still loves Adam, still sees him as his brother. But siblings don't always get along, or even like each other, even if there's that I'll-die-for-you love. And I think that's where Kevin is at. Adam hurt him, and that's gonna do some damage, and so even though Kev does understand, he's not gonna seek him out or try to fix it AS HE SHOULDN'T, because that onus is purely on Adam's shoulders.

Like. I think what white fans don't get is just how exhausting it is always having to understand, always having to be patient. Like yeah white people don't get the ins and outs like we do, so we're forced to always be understanding bc while we have to learn these things from our first days, they're just learning now. But it's exhausting, so that's why I really hope they have Adam seek Kev out, not have Kev approach him to talk about this.

(it's always why I love how they had Kevin full on yeet Adam, and beat the crap out of him. Poc always have been portrayed as patient when cruel remarks are hurled at us from people we love in anger, and I'm happy they showed Kevin snapping. Bc that was not on, and Kevin was just as worried about Kim, and Adam implying otherwise is wrong. It's also though why I also love that as soon as they were pulled apart, Kev stopped fighting/looking so angry quicker than Adam).

Like I'd be okay with Kev just saying, simply, to Adam "you don't ever say that stuff to me again." And that's that. But for them to actually have a conversation about this, has to come from Adam and HAS to start with an apology.

And Adam has to actively do better. Like no more just accepting things are different even if he doesn't understand, he HAS to learn everything, all the ins and outs, all the complexities, until he lives and breathes it as much as any white man can. Because I can't see Kevin having what was fracture ever feeling completely solid again without that.

And I do like that the show went there, because it's necessary and I think it's the best position for Adam to realise just how Shitty he was. Because Kim was found-- by the book. Like most of his anger was from how in the past, they've gotten their results by being off book, so I think in Adam's mind, he thinks that's the best way to secure safety. But it was by the book that found Kim, and I think that will really make Adam realise that these enforced policies DON'T make it harder to secure their own safety.

Also, Adam's presumably going to spend a lot of time around Makayla, and so forth, will probably get a lot of firsthand experience of seeing racism or it's affects. Like I know we wish he'd see if bc of Kev, and he does with a lot, just not other stuff, but it's different when you're seeing it through the eyes of a little kid, not a grown adult. And I think this will make Adam a lot more humble, which will help patch things up between him and Kevin.

And then there's Kim. People often forget how when you have multiple white friends, when you're hurt, your more knowledgeable friend steps in. Kim gets this stuff a lot more than Adam, even if she can never understand like Kev, and so I can COMPLETELY see her teaching Adam more stuff. Like because she'd want to help her boys, because Adam's a part of Makayla's life, because Kevin shouldn't HAVE to be the one to educate Adam, whereas Kim can bring him up to her own level, and that's when they rely on Kev.

So I think overall, I'm not that conflicted over PD because I'm really hoping this will spark deeper conversations and that Adam will grovel and fix his ignorant stances. And I hope to god they let Kevin heal and forgive in the way he should be allowed to.

I have a LOT more thoughts on this, including how I hate that they only show Adam's ignorance when a lot of the unit is also Not Great, and about partnerships and how Jay and Kev should be going forward. But this is getting really long now, so I won't delve into that or this any further. But I might, especially if it's wanted, because I have so many thoughts.

Also, thank you for sending me this ask!! I am ALWAYS comfortable sharing my thoughts on this fandom (about anything really, racism, sexism, ships ect) but especially the racism and the racial storylines and issues. Sorry it took so long to answer; I've been thinking on it all day, wanting to give you the best answer I could!!

[toshisslut]

Having a Black/AfricanAmerican GF

➤ HC, 1.4k words

➤ pairing: akaashi keiji x female reader, bokuto kotaro x female reader 

➤ genre: fluff with a lil bit of angst

➤ warnings: lil bit of angst and implied racism

This was actually inspired by an account who did a hc about dating a latina.(i can’t remember who so if you know please let me know!) i thought it was super cute and also? idk, i’m just a black fan and i’d like to think about what it would be like dating them. sue me :P 

Akaashi Keiji

So like, Keiji is already super down to earth and laid back so he takes everything in stride.

When you’re not with him he spends his time looking up cultural things so that he can understand you better

AAVE trips him up tho but that, too, he studies and researches bc he just wants to understand you better

Tbh he didn’t quite get your ThingTM about your hair but he’s not rude about it. Instead he just sits and listens to you when you talk about the teasing/trauma you went through about it

For a whole day he’s just silently mad bc “wtf, who teases someone about their hair like that? Why the hell would someone do that?” 

“Babe, it’s okay.”

“It is absolutely not okay” 

Cue soft yet angry keiji who hugs you tight and gives you kisses throughout the day, but when he’s not doing that he’s muttering to himself, cussing up a storm.

You’re nervous to meet his friends but like, he’s already beat it over their heads that if they say anything rude/offensive then he’s breaking their wrists and ankles

By accident he starts using your hair care stuff (he gets scolded bc that shit is expensive but once he starts pitching in to help you buy some he gets a pass) 

Now y’all’s hair smells like cantu and coconut oil lmao 

And THEN, of course, he starts using your skin cares stuff

“Your skin is just always so soft.” but what he doesn’t tell you is that he just loves the way you smell and him using your products is just a way for him to always be able to smell you

“Keiji,”You whine, “You’ve used up almost all of my conditioner again.” 

“Not my fault it makes my hair feel nice.” 

You roll your eyes but you aren’t mad. Not when he pitches in an equal, if not an even greater amount of money into your haircare and skincare budget. At first you assumed it was to be nice, but then you realized that he was most certainly using the products as well. 

You reach over and run your fingers through his hair. It’s much straighter than yours, so he has to use a lot less of the product to avoid the risk of making his hair oily. But now, you assume, he must have found the right ratio between his own products and yours because his hair feels amazing. 

Soft. Fluffy. 

“No fair,”You say as you pout, flopping down beside him onto the couch. “You already have pretty lashes and smooth skin, now you’re using my products and getting better results than me.” 

He wraps his arms around your waist and brings onto his lap, his work long since forgotten. “Sorry, baby.” 

“Something tells me that you’re not really sorry.” 

He’s not, but he doesn’t say that. Instead he buries his face into the place where your shoulder meets your neck. He takes in your scent and smiles, though his expression his hidden by the position the two of you are in. 

“Keiji.”You whine, pouting still. 

His smile grows wider. Yes, say his name more. He loves the way you say his name. The way it rolls off of your tongue. Your Japanese is getting better, but there’s still a cute little twang to your voice; specifically, when you say his name. (he hopes that never changes)

“Fine. How about I run us a bubble bath together, hm? Then we can do your skincare regimen together.” 

You know that this is his way of getting to use your skincare stuff too, but he’s rubbing your back in soothing circles and the way his lips brush against your neck is distracting. 

“Aren’t you...aren’t you worried that your friends will tease you for smelling like your girlfriend?” 

He turns his head and kisses your jawline. “Not at all.” 

Because really, he’s not. He’s never really cared when they teased him anyway, but he especially doesn’t care about them teasing him about this. He loves the way you smell. The way you feel. Your smile. Your laughter—everything about you really. Using your products helps him to carry your scent around with him, giving him a nice reminder throughout the day of you and everything about you that he adores. 

Bokuto Kotaro

THIS boy

Oh my goodness

So like, Bokuto is just a people person. Super sociable and friendly

Y’all probably meet while he’s in the states for a game and he’s chilling, talking to Hinata and then boom, spits out his drink bc pretty lady

He’s not super shy when it comes to introducing himself but he doesn’t get your number right away and then gets into a slump

Was it the language barrier? Was it just that she doesn’t think I’m good looking?

Calls up Akaashi like “bro oh my goodness i met the love of my life but what if she just doesn’t want me :((“

And ofc Akaashi was asleep (bc time difference) and he’s irritated bc WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING AS SOON AS I ANSWER THE PHONE??? But he tries to be a good friend regardless and is just like “then study some english, dummy” 

So Bokuto does

And like, he wasn’t the super best at studying in school but you bet your ass that he’s trying his damndest now

When y’all finally start dating he’s on cloud nine. Cutest boyfriend. Always showering you in compliments and affection

He doesn’t notice the stares that you two get from people (both Americans and Japanese folk alike) bc he’s just super heart eyes until one day and you’re just so uncomfortable. And he’s like “baby?? You okay??” 

You try to explain to him that it’s because people are staring and he’s just like “well yeah, bc you’re hot? And so am I????” 

Oh poor baby, he gets so upset when he finally gets what you mean. He’s so mad too bc like, who cares that y’all aren’t the same race? As long as you love each other because that’s what is supposed to be most important, right??

He gets super miffed about it but rather than going off on strangers every time it happens, he instead just turns to you to assure you that he loves you from the absolute bottom of his heart to the tippy top

“Bokuto-san, is that girl really your new girlfriend?”Asks one of the team’s athletic trainers.

Bokuto smiles with pride because why yes, y/n is his girlfriend and he is absolutely proud of it. You’re like sunshine to him. You make him so happy. 

“Yeah,”He replies, “She is.” 

The smile on his face fades when the trainer’s face scrunches up into a grimace. “Ahh, but Bokuto-san, you’re so popular in Japan. Do you really need a girl like her?” 

You and Bokuto had been through this before. Some family members and some friends (could you two even call them friends at that point?) had made similar comments to the both of you. Some of them tried to be passive aggressive about it while others just straight up voiced their displeasure at your coupling. 

It was none of their business though. 

Not at all. 

“And what is that supposed to mean?”He asks the trainer, standing to his full height of 6’2. He towers over the short man and stares him down. Waiting. He’s waiting for an answer but all the trainer can do is stutter and shake. “Oh come on, don’t go silent on me now. You had so much to say only a couple of seconds ago. Speak. Up.” 

“I just meant...well, are you sure she’s a good look for you?” 

That sets him off. 

The conversation between the two of them had gone widely unnoticed by those in the room. That is, of course, until Bokuto was about to swing on him. Then chaos broke out. It took Atsumu and Oikawa to hold him back.

(Hinata tried but failed. He grabbed onto Bokuto’s arm but basically just had to hold on for dear life as Bokuto flung his arm about)

The athletic trainer gets fired because there’s no way Bokuto would ever even think about working with him again and, once he told his teammates about what happened, they stood behind him. (They like you a lot and they’ll be damned if you get talked about like that)

No one tells you anything but when Bokuto meets up with you that night for dinner, he hugs you a bit tighter and kisses you for just a bit longer. 

Because, yeah, he may not care what other people say or think when it comes to your relationship, but you’re his #1. He’ll be damned if he lets anyone speak about you in his presence. 

perhaps i’ll continue this as a series with other characters (or maybe even more oneshots? idk,,,lemme know!)

[icharchivist]

cries think I made my ask too long so like half of it got deleted bc I typed it right into the askbox. anyways. I come bearing a3 thoughts! at first i was gonna watch the spring/summer and autumn/winter ones and then give my thoughts on both but. turns out i had too many thoughts lol? which i shouldve expected but i actually kind of... got bored by the first two chapters of this event! so i skipped and went to the stranger. and then went back. (1/?)

and then i got to like "tsuzuru and kazunari are having a fight?" and jumped on that like a starving wolf bc helllll yeah! i rly adored kazunari in sardine search, i think he was great! hes just so nice and has good vibes. he and taichi are kind of similar i feel? but i think their respective ages contribute to a lot of difference in their characters. why does it feel like this askbox limit personally wants me dead. (2/?)

anyways! i rly enjoyed the improv scene devolving to a real fight. admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event... it was still good tho. the scene i mean. (3/?)

also i rly liked tenma ragging on them afterwards. like he was mean but. first i adore tenma. second he just felt like. a different meddling type to muku lol? like the vibes he gave me were always like... im going to be a considerate leader and watch out for the ppl under me! therefore im gonna make sure theyre doing fine! aggressively. i think tenmas also just like a friendly person who likes to take care of others in general? like im not saying hes omi or anything but just like. (4/?)

that time he offers his car ride to juza so they can go to school together like hes surprisingly open compared to his initial prickliness. also ive got thoughts abt the tenma juza SSR conversation thing i read. one day ill make a tenma and juza fic and complete a trifecta haha... but thats something for another day! back to the actual story. the way tsuzuru dives right in after kazunari! that was so nice. like its easy to see how much they care abt each other. (5/?)

to the point where like even while theyre fighting theyre like angry but still like fairly quiet bc i think theyre both at least trying to be considerate of each other. ah the moment kazunari didnt respond to tsuzuru trying to talk to him i KNEW he was sick tho. felt proud of myself for calling that one but also the reason i knew is bc i have used the "character being sick during an argument causing them both to make up with each other" trope myself before so uh. like recognizes like haha. (6/?)

anyways the cg there was fuckin beautiful like kazunari looks so sad in the middle bit but then u see his shy smile? like hes sick but hes also like. happy to be there. idk. lovely. i adore kazu i think hes just deeply sweet to other people. tsuzuru telling him "you make everyone around you feel as bright and cheery as the things you design” is so wonderful too (7/?)

now im thinking. ah tsuzuru probably feels quite drained after a script and such (i know i am when i finish any piece--its like the emotions just rush out of me) so i like to think that like yknow. kazunari dropping by his room or whatever helps him set himself back to normal! but also when tsuzurus like oh u left ur magazines here! i suddenly remembered. wait shit kazunari and tsuzuru arent even roommates. wonder how much they bother masumi lmaooo. anyways overall very good story! (8/?)

some more thoughts: itaru and citron were so cute in this event! just like. citron saying itaru winking makes his heart skip a beat and itaru quoting citrons wrong sayings (which. i am also guilty of today i told my brother "we'll jump that bridge when we cross it" so) also i love how yuki is like "thank god i wasnt partnered with that hack" but like. yuki. u could literally just not talk about him. like its so funny to me yuki is like wow i hate tenma but he wont shut up abt him haha (9/?)

i also was a lil taken aback at hearing itaru go "for the lulz" tbh... like it fits him. but im mad it fits him? anywaysss thats all i had for this one! im gonna watch autumn/winter and go say my thoughts on that soon. sorry the ask was so broken up, idk what happened!

OLA FRIEND! Glad to see your thoughts again omg :3c

tho omg the fact tumblr deleted it all + the ask limit was all so evil D: poor friend.

I'm putting my answer under a read more because. Well. *waves hand* it got long.

The non-play events can be perhaps a little harder to get into because unlike the plays events that you start with a clear idea of at least the main plot (re: "they are preparing a play, i know the leads so i know who it will focus on"), non-plays events take a little longer to first set up what event they're participating in, how to prepare for it, and then bring up the conflict and which characters are going to have something to do with said conflict. So i can understand that they're a little harder to get into when we know the plays awaits.

On top of that, the first few events still were a bit tame because since it was early when the app released, i think they didn't go too heavy at once in case some people were still stuck on earlier chapters (esp since especially Winter is hard to unlock)

ANYWAY glad that it sucked you in on the second read :3c

So glad you were invested in that conflict!

Totally agreeing with you about Kazunari, and very good point about Taichi as well! they aren't the Puppy Pair for nothing :'D (Yuki took one look at both of them together and just Knew. His suffering knows no end (lovingly)). But yeah i think they have a lot in common, they both are the really bright and friendly figure, both also started in overcompensating a bit because both wanted to be popular in some ways.

But we do have, on one hand, Kazunari who wanted that rather late in his life while Taichi always thrived for that, the fact Kazunari made friends easily and it's just that he was scared of getting to the next level, while Taichi always struggled with this quest for popularity. In a way too both of them were at least scared to share a part of them, Kazunari worrying to show his thoughts, and Taichi being a spy and all of that... which impacts them really differently considering the guilt it puts on Taichi. And then you add their age into the mix, especially the fact Kazu is the oldest of his troupe and Taichi the youngest of his, it makes them fairly similar all while being fairly different.

both are so interesting to me and i love them bothhh, so it's always nice to see them have focus.

admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event

i love how you are seeing the patterns a3 tends to do it's so neat!

It's true the fight isn't really similar to their actual fight, though i do love that they had "swapped" their personality for the act and ended up insulting each other for theirr swapped personality. Like, Kazunari insulted part of himself in Tsuzuru's character and Tsuzuru did the same?? and then the fight escalated and the way Kazunari broke character hurts bc it's really that Tsuzuru hit where it hurts. But yeah it still wasn't too relevent to their actual fight, though i think the thing is that their fight was as such mostly because they tend to clash often due to their personalities rather than just this singular reason why, so to have the play go more "it's their personalities the problem" kinda hurt lol. But yeah still agreed that it didn't reflect much on the plot itself

I was rereading the improv bit to answer correctly and man since we're going to talk about Tenma next, i just. Love that when Kazunari, breaking character, his eyes sad, tells Tsuzuru "you have no rights talking to me like that..." it then cuts on Tenma being upset. Bc like. Exactly like you say, he wants to look out for the people under him. and like. Kazunari is his friend. A friend he also snapped at once and insulted for being who he was, so he probably could have relived a bit of his fight with Kazunari seeing those two fights; Except that now Kazunari is one of his closest friend and he doesn't like that.

Also like. It was also because he could still hide under the plot of the improv but it's so rare, and it never happened before that point, that Kazunari stands for himself in a "the way you treat me is unfair"? Like again re: his fight with Tenma, when Tenma snapped at him, while Tenma was unfair with him, Kazunari took the blame, called himself annoying and all yaknow?

The fact Kazunari is starting to accept that he can take more place for himself is something the whole Summer Troupe have been trying to help him work on, but especially Tenma. Tenma is always there trying to push Kazunari to say what he means, to express his feelings, to stop hiding.

And for once, Kazunari does that in front of everyone... and it's because he's breaking because of his fight with Tsuzuru.

I think Tenma probably felt it was even more of a reason to get involved like, this is the thing he's been working on with Kazunari about, and now he's being all hurt about it, not on Tenma's watch!

And i totally agree with your take on Tenma! (and would LOVE to read the Tenma and Juza fic once you get to it :3c). I think, Tenma is really caring and is trying to take a place as a caretaker and all, but unlike Omi, he has absolutely no reference for it.

Omi is the eldest of multiple brothers and everything indicates his parents have always been lovely to him. Add to it how he ended up leader of a delinquent crew he was clearly looking after, Omi has a history of taking care of people, of nurturing them, and he knows what he's doing. Meanwhile Tenma grew up on TV sets, mostly surrounded by adults and not by people his age, mostly getting advice from being ordered around by directors i think. And his parents are distant, hyperfocused on their job, not really nursing with him. So Tenma meanwhile really didn't have a family emotional support and was in situation where he couldn't befriend other kids his age. His only reference was probably Igawa (his agent) and i think for a long time he didn't exactly see it, and Igawa remained mostly professional so there was probably the idea of it not being sincere? That Tenma had to grow out of.

So like, they're both extremely nurturing and caring, but my point is that Omi has experiences in it and is at ease with it, while Tenma has been so alone and in places were he had no support system that even if he wants to support others, he still struggles with how to do it because he has no set exemple. And that's his development in the main story arc, to learn from how Izumi shows she cares in order to care back at them all.

Like i mean the way Tenma yelled at them about their mistakes at first feel like he would have picked it up from some directors on TV set yaknow? Probably hearing them say that with no consequences on others actors, seeing it worked, didn't think "that's an abuse of power and the actors probably all think badly of their director for that" but "wow that works", tried it on his troupesmates and realized this is... not how that works. And it's spending time watching how Izumi encourages them that have him fix his way to approach it.

So yeah i got lost too into it but like. I feel you on Tenma i love him so much and i love his development so to see him get pissed and involved there? was really nice. even if he was aggressive about it. He's still learning.

ANYWAY back to Tsuzuru and Kazunari, totally agree with what you say next. They still care a lot about each other and yeah they're at a point where this consideration they have for each other make their anger more quiet than trying to attack one another (Banri could NEVER-). so yeah totally agree with you!

DLKFJDLKF i LOVE the reasoning on "recognizing that Kazunari was sick". Your writer's powers making you see through... *coughs* unlike Tsuzuru....

AND YEAH ALL YOU SAY ABOUT THE CG.. YEAH. Kinda crying thinking about it again now LDKJFLKDJF It's just. Everything about it is so soft and tender. The things Tsuzuru tells Kazunari are soo so sweet sobs. They're just adorable i love those kids. and also i feel you for Kazu he's just that great huh?

The whole set up about Kazu dropping by his room is so so cute! I love it! Like probably the very first time Tsuzuru braces himself because "oh no i'm not in the mood to stand mister hyperenergy himself" but Kazunari quickly adjust his energy so that Tsuzuru can just recharge without being overwhelmed. Yes it would drive Masumi completely nuts. Which i think is a plus for Tsuzuru like, hey, if Masumi gets annoyed once in a while it's a win. But yeah also i think that Tsuzuru and Kazunari should really have the Artistic Soldiarity of Students in Art school Probably Working Until Very Late To Complete Their Projects. Would love if at the end Tsuzuru gave it back yaknow?

but yeah their story was really nice i'm so glad you liked it! :D

oh god yeah Itaru and Citron were SO cute in it too, i also love the comments Citron makes about Itaru's winks. Just there flirting in front of everyone like those two embarrassing friends huh. (probably with Muku being all starry eyes considering he greatly admires both Itaru and Citron and, well, Romance.). And yeah i love how Itaru ends up so much into Citron's rhythm (and this idiom you said? is glorious actually, 10 points for you)

DLKFJDLKF what a call out toward Yuki. "yes i hate Tenma,no i won't shut up about him, also if YOU say you hate Tenma i'm going to stab you with my needles, have a nice fucking day.". I love their dynamics so much aha

And yeah Itaru is there cursing us the whole time with the fact he's the greatest nerd ever and it fits him perfectly. It makes me laugh so hard.

Thank you so much for having shared your thoughts there! it's always a blast to read through them and i dearly enjoyed it! (+ it makes me relive the event a little and it makes me soft!)

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! So glad you had so many thoughts about all of this, what a blast.

thank you for sharing, and looking forward the Autumn/Winter reactions :3c

Take care!

[iridescentides]

i watched the ep twice bc i didnt take notes the first time BUT. hsmtmts 2.04 thoughts under the cut

gina first. my favorite part of the episode was when she admitted that she feels out of place living in someone else’s house and that she wanted a bigger part in the play. i was SO worried they were gonna just let her happily sideline herself in a “yay she learned her lesson about not being the center of attention” kind of way bc i would not be able to handle that two seasons in a row. let her be angry!!! she has a lot to be upset about

the gina/carlos conflict was awful bc theyre making carlos unreasonably annoying this season. last season he was nice, he was enthusiastic, not competitive and just rooting for other people. idk why they needed to flip him so drastically to being spoiled, rich, selfish, pushy, and bitchy. and on top of that i have not been vibing with the pieces of dialogue theyve been giving him this season just to score woke points. its so unbearably obvious that even though hes a brown gay character, he was written by a white gay person who thought, on some level, that he was giving the gen z kids the #hashtag representation they wanted. his delivery of every line that screams “remember, im mexican” is so awkward, it doesnt land well, and im begging them to stop. they want so badly to commodify his character and parade him around as a “look how diverse our show is!” thing and im so so sick of it bc you can tell, with all the surface-level pieces of dialogue, that they dont actually care at all

(”look around, theres not a lot of me at this school” we GET it, this show wants to be glee so bad)

im honestly starting to slowly ship rina less and less. in season one i loved seeing someone make gina happy, especially since she had no friends before opening up to ricky. but now its just a whole mess and i wish she would love herself a lil more to realize that its not worth all this stress. he made a choice and no amount of conflicted moments of eye contact is going to fully take that back. im not necessarily against love triangle plots, but i HATE the whole “women wait around hopefully while male character, whose decisions have already hurt multiple people, makes up his mind” bullshit

that being said, gina handled the situation like a CHAMP, im dying over how quickly she was able to mask her pain and make the joke about the twix bar. im love her

we were absolutely ROBBED of an ej/big red performance this episode!!! i am at my LIMIT we better get gaston next week or i will riot

on the ej train, him not getting into duke was extremely predictable. we all kinda saw that coming and knew that would be his main point of growth this season. im glad they didnt wait super long to do it. now please @ writers i am BEGGING you to give my man more screen time than one scene per episode

its very odd that they keep making mr mazzara have emotionally tough conversations with the students. i will do a parallel gifset of those once the season ends. i liked his convo with ej for the most part, but he really didnt have to beat him over the head with the “youre an emotionless robot” thing again. its clear ej is gonna throw himself into av club or whatever (even though at the end of last season that was supposed to be big red?) and discover that he has a lot going for him. because he does, he literally has everything going for him, thats why they had to make his “problem” not knowing himself. bisexual ej caswell ftw

i love the parallels between ej and nini this episode? i think since the beginning ive felt that there was a lot about them under the surface that was similar. it was interesting seeing ej tell nini about duke first, instead of the obvious choice of ashlyn. i wouldve loved to see how that scene wouldve gone with ricky, gina, carlos, or big red though bc each reaction and attempt at comforting him wouldve been so different. i didnt love that nini had to be pulled away from the conversation, but im glad they can still talk to each other after everything that went down. and i love the juxtaposition of ej’s convo with mazzara directly following nini’s convo with miss jenn bc theyre essentially the same.

speaking of, i loved miss jenn in this episode. her stories are always so funny, but i loved seeing her care so much for nini and guide her, like a teacher. i loved how she pointed out that everyone who loves nini just wants her to be happy

im glad nini is leaving yac bc there was no good way to keep that up honestly. but im pretty annoyed that they were so obvious about it? like, they immediately made it the worst place in the world without exploring it very much. the place is super unrealistic, ive never been to drama school but im sure it wouldnt be like that. no creative arts place for KIDS would be so impossibly limiting. plus the weird bluish coloring in comparison to the nice warm tones of the rest of the show was, again, a dead giveaway. why send her to the school at all if it wasnt even gonna matter?

even though im glad nini left yac, im NOT looking forward to the way miss jenn is about to bend over backwards to put her in the play somehow. she plays obvious favorites and im so annoyed

(sidenote: nini just? decided to leave yac without consulting her parents??? ummm)

granted is a very good song, one of my faves so far

ricky deciding to tell nini he wants her to stay was stupid. what did he think that would accomplish? who in their right mind would drop out of a good school for you?

i loved when nini said yac was missing something, and miss jenn said “ricky” and nini said “you.” that was so so sweet and cute

i think the kourtney/howie thing is gonna grow on me. i hate amatonormativity so im not a big fan of them introducing a whole ass character exclusively so kourtney can have a love interest, but i loved the gesture he made of bringing her the pizzas and her flashcards. i feel like kourtneys love language is acts of service, and she was literally this meme when he did that for her:

i liked seeing ashlyn try to be there emotionally for gina! i want more of them together

overall this episode was okay. not enough songs, and i wish they were spreading out the emotional conversations through the season instead of packing them all into literally one episode, but what we did get was pretty good.

after watching the preview i see that next weeks episode is gonna be about carlos’s party, and i love party episodes. BUT i hope that after that ep we finally get an advancement on the north high stuff! i dont give too many fucks about lily, but i wanna see my son asher angel

[pappydaddy]

A Lumberjack and A Mullet ii (b.h.)

  A/N: This is the requested second part to A Lumberjack and A Mullet. This piece still references a bad home life and child abuse. However, this is going to focus more about Billy and the reader finding safety and happiness in each other, but unfortunately, there will be mentions of the abuse. Once again, this is not a good depiction of someone suffering through this situation since I am once again trying to keep this on the lighter side of things. 

Disclaimer: This is an imagine that involves a very sensitive topic. This imagine contains mentions of child abuse, violence, and an unhealthy home life - please read with caution. Reader’s discretion is advised.

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Show/Movie: Stranger Things

Requested

Loosely inspired by Sparks Fly by Taylor Swift bc I was listening to it when I started to write it and this happened.

Part One | Part Two -You’re here! | Part Three 

Warnings: Mentions child abuse, violence, and an unhealthy home life. Reader’s discretion is advised.

masterlist | taglist | wips | navigation

Here are some resources from child abuse advocates:

- Child Maltreatment from World Health Organization   - Children Rights Organizations in Canada/some U.N.

If you or anyone you know faces the issues/treatment addressed in this imagine, please, please know that you are not alone, that someone out there can help you and understand what you are going through. Please never hesitate to reach out to organizations and advocates in your area. My DMs are always open for anyone who needs someone to talk to. Once again, please reach out to someone if you need help - there are tons of people to help.

- not my gif - 

Billy Hargrove wasn’t a good idea. He was a heartbreaker, a playboy of great proportions, everyone saw it. Many have fallen victim to his charming ways and were left with their hearts bleeding in their hands. Even Y/N’s friends (who were far from angels themselves) were warning her about him, but they didn’t see the Billy she saw. Somehow, in that fateful Saturday detention, they managed to break each other’s walls down with a smile. The tenderness in his touch shocked Y/N when they first held hands, but it shocked her, even more, when he had the same tenderness when he had held her in his arms for the first time. 

  They had become dependent on each other. They were each other’s safe space. Even now, as Y/N cowered in the corner of her darkroom, flinching every time her father’s fist collided with the weak wood separating them. The wood cracked, it was only a matter of time until the door finally broke. Standing on shaky legs, Y/N trusted her gut - knowing that she had to get out of there in the case today was the day that the door gave out under the strong punch of her father. Her heart thundered, drowning out the thump of knuckles against the splintering wood as she grabbed her book bag. Slipping on her raincoat, she yanked open the window. A few raindrops fell through the open window, but she slipped through anyway, pulling the hood over her hair. 

  The night was darker than normal for ten at night, the rain clouds attempting to smother the moon’s light. The drop from her room was scary, her room being on the second floor and all. Her bag hit the wet grass before she eased herself out the window, her fingers gripping the ledge in terror. The soles of her converse kept slipping against the wet siding - her fingers becoming slick as rain pounded them. Squeezing her eyes closed, she kicked off the side of her house, her grip finally letting go of the ledge. For a moment, she felt weightless as she plummeted to the ground, her knees bent in anticipation of meeting the ground. With a squish, her feet met the wet grass, water splashing up on her ankles as she let out a hiss, her ankles stinging from the impact. 

  Without a second thought, she slung her book bag over her shoulder and booked it to the nearest payphone. Despite it being quite a ways away, it was still closer than Billy’s house. As rain pelted down on her, drenching her raincoat, she felt warm tears slipping down her face - a stark contrast from the cold rain. The phone booth door rattled as she pulled it open, slipping into the clear booth. She took another breath, watching the raindrops fall, the yellow light from the streetlight casting down on the lonely booth. As her eyes followed the racing raindrops down the plexiglass, she thought about Billy - trying to halt her tears and trembling body.

  They had just finished another Saturday detention, once again ending up sitting on the hood of Billy’s car just like they had for the past three months. Y/N sipped at her soda, tucked under Billy’s arm as he leaned against his windshield. The winter months were melting away just like the snow that had covered the group a few weeks ago. Y/N leaned against Billy’s chest, the pair watching the stars as they sat in content silence. “Do you want a sip?” She suddenly asked, craning her neck to look at Billy, twisting to practically lay beside him as she extended the almost gone soda to him. 

  He dropped his eyes from the twinkling stars to look at her. “Sure, are you done with it?” He asked, gently taking the fast-food cup from her. 

  She nodded, her hand falling to rest on his chest, her head resting on his shoulder as she gazed up at him. “Yeah,” His strong jaw clenched as he took the straw between his lips, drinking the rest of the lukewarm soda. She smiled at him when he glanced down at her, leaning down to press his lips against her in a peck. Y/N hummed against his lips, her legs wrapping around one of his jean-clad legs. “I never want this to end.” She stated, her other hand coming up to twirl one of Billy’s blonde curls around her finger. 

  “Never want what to end?” Billy asked, his deep voice rumbling in his chest. She sighed at the feeling of the vibrations in his chest, his large hand tracing random shapes on her hip. 

  “This. You and I laying here,” She clarified. “I never want to go home.” She muttered the hand that once rested on his chest reaching down to pick at the blanket Billy had thrown over them in an effort to keep them warm longer. 

  “Pretty soon, that won’t be your home, I’ll be your home,” Billy told her, squeezing her closer to him. She hummed, pulling the blanket up farther before laying her hand back on his chest. “After we graduate, and I mean right after we graduate, we’re loading up my car and heading to California to start our life together.”

  “Do you really think I’m California material?” She asked, peering up at him again. 

  “I know you are.” He replied confidently. 

  That’s another side of Billy nobody but she saw: the dreamer. He had big dreams of moving back to California someday, getting back into surfing.  She sighed, peeling her drenched bag off her back. Pulling out a few quarters, she slipped them into the payphone, picking up the receiver before quickly dialing the number she knew by heart. Instantly, she heard the ringing as she drummed her fingers against the phone, glancing over her shoulder. She always felt like she was in a horror movie when she was out during the night, especially when she stood in a phone booth at night. “Hello?” A young voice spoke through the phone, making Y/N let out a breath. 

  “Hi, Max. Can I talk to Billy, it’s important.” She rushed out to the younger girl, recognizing the voice immediately. 

  “Yeah, just a second.” She answered her. Y/N could hear Max faintly call for Billy, saying that she was on the phone for him. She supposed Neil was out since Max was the one answering the phone. It was only a few beats of waiting until she heard the shuffling of Max trading the phone off to Billy. 

  “Hello, babe, what’s up?” He asked. Y/N could already see him leaning against the wall by the phone in a white wife-beater, the phone pinched between his shoulder and his ear, his arms crossed over his chest with a smile on his face showing off his perfect teeth. 

  “I need you to pick me up, I jumped out my window.” She rushed out, trying not to get distracted by the visual of him. She heard him jolt on the other end. 

  “Where are you, I’ll come to get you right away.” 

  “The payphone, the one I usually call you from.” She told him, knowing that he knew which one she was talking about. 

  “Okay, stay in the booth, I’ll be there in a few minutes.” With that, he hung the phone up, but Y/N wasn’t offended. This was how it normally went when she called him to pick her up. He would always hang up right away, her safety being the only thing he worried about. He would drop everything run to her. She silently hung the phone up, leaning her back against the plexiglass. Closing her eyes, she listened to the rhythmic sound of rain hitting it. A ghost of a smile stretched onto her face as another memory flooded her mind. 

  Billy held her in his arms as they laid on the grass. They watched the fireworks, their faces lighting up with each explosion of colour in the sky. Her hands gently played with his hair absentmindedly. It was the Hawkins’ Fall Festival, armed with games, fireworks, fall-themed foods, and an overcrowded field. Even though they were camped out far away from the festival itself, they still marveled at the extravagant fireworks it had. “Pretty good third date, huh?” Billy’s voice interrupted the fireworks, making her turn her head from the loud pops. She was shocked to see him already looking at her, his eyes soft as they flicked over her face. 

  “An extremely good third date,” She corrected him, pressing a kiss to his cheek before settling back to watch the remaining fireworks. “The Fall Festival has never been so enjoyable for me. Thank you.” She whispered not lifting her head to look at him as she spoke, her eyes dancing across the dark sky the colourful sparks fell - fading out completely before they fell to the ground. 

  She felt his arms tighten around her, then his lips pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her hair. She signed instinctively, melting into his warm embrace. “You don’t have to thank me,” Billy spoke against the top of her head, his lips lingering as he took in the scent of her shampoo. “Did you put perfume on to the top of your head?” He asked, pulling away as he caught a strong whiff of her perfume - a scent that drove him crazy and sends his mind whirling.

  “Yeah,” She admitted quietly before looking up at him defensively. “I read about it in Cosmo so I wanted to try it out, what are you going to do about it?.” 

  Billy let out a barking laugh, squeezing her affectionately as she started to laugh along with him. “You’re adorable.” 

  The sound of Billy’s car pulled her from the memory. Fluttering her eyes open, she was met with the blinding lights of his car speeding towards the booth. With a squeal of his tires, he pulled over to the curb. Grabbing her bag from the ground, she pushed the door back open. In a blink of an eye, Billy was out of the still-running car and wrapping her in a hug. Her bag dropped to the wet concrete as her arms settle over his shoulders, his hands pressing into the small of her back to press her flush against his body. 

  They clung to each other, hands fisting each other’s clothes. “I am so glad you’re okay.” Billy murmured into her neck as he swayed them gently. Her smaller hands let go of his rain jacket, her hands resting on his jaw to pull his face from her neck, their eyes meeting. 

  “I’m always going to be okay as long as you’re with me.” She whispered. Not even a second later, his lips were on hers, the force of the kiss nearly knocking her over. Automatically, her fingers buried themselves into Billy’s soaked curls as their lips moved together, pouring all their love into the kiss. Fireworks exploded within them, just like they exploded in the sky the night of the Fall Festival.

  She knew people said that Billy wasn’t a good decision, that she should run, but she also knew that she would never run and that he was the best decision for her. The was abundantly clear now as his lips caressed hers with the utmost care and love, his hands holding her as if she’d break if he held her any tighter. 

[ajokeformur-ray]

Hey can I get some headcanons of your relationship with your F/O parents bc y’all are such a cute family dynamic and I wanna hear more about how you all interact🥰💗

and @arianatheangelworld 

asdfghjkl; omgggg~ you’re all gonna kill me asghj 🥺😭😭thank you darlings omggg ~ 🥰🥰🥰💗 I hope that you all enjoy this, it’s always so bittersweet but also so comforting and fun to explore my dynamic with my parental F/Os and, well... isn’t that the point of it all?💖 Thank you thank you thank you for supporting and enabling me omggg ~ 💙😊

Word count: 3, 184 (holy shit I am so sorry... not😂)

It’s a quiet life, but there’s lots of underlying tensions beneath it all.

By quiet, I mean because I spend my days in my bedroom studying (not so far from reality, these relationships😂) but there are underlying tensions because no one in the household knows who Edward Hyde really is - it’s a secret between my parents and I. 

What that means is that it’s tricky for Papa and myself to spend time with one another if other members of the household are awake - as far as they are concerned, Father is my parent and so is Mama, and Papa has no part in that. So as you can imagine, questions would be raised if Papa and I are caught spending too much time together (plus, this is set in the Victorian Era, so you can imagine the scandal of an unmarried twenty-three year old woman spending lots of time alone in a room, unchaperoned, with a man old enough to be her father...)

This is why Papa and I only have our time together late into the night, when said members of the household have gone to bed and it’s only my parents and I who are awake. It’s safer for all of us that way - it protects Father and his name, his reputation and his career, which in turn protects the household members from being turned out onto the streets due to a lack of employment and this in turn protects Father’s family, who always come first.

From the moment I wake up, my parents are there. As you’ve probably gathered from previous posts, I sleep with my parents a lot so it isn’t unusual for me to wake up with one of them. Rare and special occasions mean that I get to wake up with Mama and either Father or Papa. 

Mama’s always up by five in the morning or she’ll fall behind on her chores so if she’s the one I slept with in the night, then I’ll get up when she does. She always insists that I go back to bed and that I go to sleep, but I rarely do. I much prefer to have those early hours with her so that I can help her with her chores and maybe, if I’m very lucky... I’ll get to be the one who takes Father his breakfast tray so that I get to see him early in the morning and so that I can crawl into his bed and get me some extra cuddles before I start my day.

If I sleep in with Father, then the opposite happens and I’m woken up when he gets brought his breakfast tray (7 AM on the dot!), and of course I end up getting up when he does because even though he won’t kick me out of his bed, he also knows that if he leaves me to my own devices in a soft, warm bed, I’ll end up falling asleep until noon and then I’ll beat myself up about it, so he makes sure I am awake and up before he’s done with his breakfast (and if Mama knows I slept in with Father, she’ll bring me some breakfast too!) to save me any emotional distress. 

Father always wakes me up gently... up until a certain point. He will shake me gently while saying my name, which usually gets a sleepy groan from me. Then, it’s onto talking, with his voice going from a whisper and increasing in volume until he’s just above his normal speaking level. He never raises his voice at me and we all know why. If that doesn’t work, then Father will just “accidentally” pull the covers off of me. He isn’t subtle, but he also isn’t mean about it, and if I do genuinely need some more sleep, then he will let me have that. But for the most part, he makes sure that I’m up once he is on the nights I’m in his bed.

I never ever get to wake up with Papa. It just doesn’t happen for various reasons. Firstly, because Papa’s constantly moving around like a lion stuck in a cage and he loves me dearly but not enough to stay in one place for more than a few hours unless he’s already sleeping. Secondly, because he can’t be caught in my bed or vice versa by anyone other than Mama to protect Father’s name etc. Thirdly, I may wake up to Papa crawling into my bed or easing himself in his own if I fell asleep in his bed, but I don’t ever get to start my day with Papa. Our time is night time and that has to be non-negotiable. It does upset me if I wake up in an especially needy mood, but Father and Mama will get me through the day in the meantime.

Mama likes to sneak me items of Papa’s or Father’s clothing to wear when I go to bed. She’s not supposed to but Mama is sleight of hand and I can be quick when I need to be. She and I often have silent conversations in a crowded room and all it takes is for Mama to “accidentally” make a noise, like a quick scuffing of her boot on the floor or for her knuckles to make a noise against the wooden table and I just look at her.  Mama catches my eye and then gives me A Look before she turns back to her ironing. I walk past and at the point where our lower bodies are hidden by the ironing board, she stuffs an unironed shirt in my hand (usually Papa’s) and I walk off, the shirt stowed away under my arm and then placed for safe-keeps under my pillow for the night time. Sometimes it might be one of her night-dresses, but I am comfier in either Papa or Father’s clothes.

There are so many secrets between myself and my parents which are kept from the other members of the household. Between all three of us, we manage it as best as we can, though I have no doubt that the others think we're a little odd. 😊

There are periods which are weeks long where Father is so busy in his laboratory that no one sees him. It's communication .via. letters on the stairs and that's all anyone hears from him. Mama and I worry immensely but Father's always been this way and all we can do is be patient and wait for him. He's a workaholic and he often makes himself sick from all of the working and everyone in the household knows what to do when these times arise, which are getting more frequent as Father gets older.

In especially bad times, even Mama won't be able to get through to Father. I get upset if that's the case, because if he shuts away the one person he loves above all else, it's a serious warning sign. Mama and I have a pact that if she can't get through, then I will. Father is always so protective of me, and now it's my turn to protect him. I take this very seriously, understandably so, and I wait up until two or three in the morning, so late that even Mama's gone to bed and is sleeping. I wait in his study for that time, reading one of his old medical journals, and then I go downstairs, out the back door, and into the laboratory.

It's freezing in there because there's where Father used to carry out dissections and lectures back before his illness (never canonically diagnosed but it's believed to be depression or similar) got worse, so I always take him his old smoking jacket (which doubles as my blanket when I take naps in his study). By this time in the night, Father will be so tired and sleep-deprived that he's more likely to be honest with me, and it's for this reason that I also stayed up so late - Father will assume I'm unable to sleep because I'm so worried about him, and while that's true, it's also because I know him well enough to know what time of night is best for an intervention. Yes, it's slightly manipulative on my end of things, but I am my Papa's daughter and it's with good intentions so I don't linger on this thought for too long. It won't do me any good and my Father's most important. I'd do anything for him.

I find Father where I knew he would be - scribbling in a journal by candlelight, his fingers covered in ink, his hair a mess, yawning every few seconds. A cold plate of mutton is left forgotten by his elbow, only half eaten. I'm just like him when I study so I don't lecture my Father on his bad eating habits -he and I have the same work ethic so I would be a hypocrite to tell him off for something he usually tells me off for. I announce myself by putting his smoking jacket over his shoulders. Father pulls the jacket around himself with a shiver and I smile. You're welcome.

"You should be in bed, Erika." Father frowns in disapproval and I almost want to call him out on his hypocrisy.

"So should you," My tone is sharp with worry and frustration and Father takes a moment to look at me - I never speak to him like this. "Mama's really worried about you. So am I. We haven't seen Papa for weeks, and we - " Just like always, my anger turns to upset and I move away, trying not to cry.

"Erika." I turn back to my Father and I see that he has tears in his eyes, too. He's hurting and even though he's been trying to find a cure for years, he's never been able to find one which really helps him. "I am sorry, I - my work, it is. Well, let's not discuss the details." A pause. Neither of us know what to do, even when there is no one to see or hear us. "Come here." He pats his lap and I make a happy noise, which makes him smile. I love sitting on my Father's lap - it's been something I've done ever since I was a child and it always makes me feel so safe.

I go and I sit on my Father's lap (and have a quiet cry - he knows but he doesn't say anything about it because he doesn't want to embarrass me) and he continues to work, but as the hours drag on and we both get increasingly tired, Father knows that the time for working is over. On these nights when I manage to find my Father in his own mind and pull him back with just my presence (and my very existence is a reminder of what he holds most dear), I also spend the night in his bed.

"Thank you, Erika, for..." Father trails off, but I know what he's saying to me.

I snuggle into his bed, feel my Father kiss my forehead and whisper his love, and then I sleep.

The night is half the battle - getting Father to take a break tomorrow morning will be an even bigger battle, but by then Mama will be awake and we'll work together to save Father from himself.

It's not the first or the last time, but all of us in the family have our Own Moments which require special attentions and solutions, and we love each other even harder during those times.

The reunion with Papa after getting Father to take a break from his weeks of working always makes me cry, too.

Over the years, it's become almost a... tradition, of sorts, for Papa to greet me this way after a long separation.

I could be doing anything - reading in Father's study, writing in my bed, studying at my desk - and all of a sudden, out of nowhere -

"Erika."

Whispered so casually, so quietly, but my entire body freezes. I know that voice anywhere. I drop whatever I'm doing, I tear up, and I turn, slowly...

Papa's smirking at me, a cold and calculative look in his eyes, but I'm not afraid. I'm not even nervous. Anyone else would make me step back with this look, but not Papa. No.

"Oh, my - Papa!" I step forward into his embrace and I melt into the parent I've been missing most of all. I cry, of course I do, and Papa says nothing about it (he and Father aren't so different at all, once you get to know them, though I'd never tell them that. Or Mama. It's a thought I keep entirely to myself.) because he doesn't see why he should need to; he only holds me tighter.

I can almost hear his fond eye roll and it makes me smile.

"It's difficult to understand someone who is entirely incapable of asking for what he most wants, wouldn't you agree? You're the only one he listens to," our daughter.

There is pride in Papa's voice but just like always, I can hear what he doesn't say, just as he hears what I don't say. It's just how it is between us; Papa and I have a level of understanding between us which we don't have with anyone else.

That night, Papa sleeps in my bed with me. I'm never ready to say goodbye to him, or goodnight, either. The following conversation is a nightly ritual because of this:

"Just five more minutes, Papa?"

"I'll be here tomorrow night. you know that. Sleep, child."

"But - "

"Erika."

A warning. No one else receives warnings from the Edward Hyde and lives to tell the tale. So I listen.

"Fine." I know he will be with me tomorrow night. "Stay with me 'til I fall asleep?"

Papa sighs, rolls his eyes, and pointedly lays down, watching me the whole time. I couldn't hide my smile if I tried, so I don't even bother to - Papa taught me to show my emotions and to not hide them.

"Goodnight, Erika."

"'Night, Papa. Love you."

A kiss on the top of my head, and all else fades to black.

My parents and I are very physically affectionate with one another and it's... unusual, especially if you consider the fact that it's in the Victorian Era, but the members of the household find it touching. They get hugs and affection, too! Even if they don't necessarily know how to react to it, they still do get their hugs in the morning and late at night just before they all go to bed (which is between 10 and 11, whereas I go to bed anywhere from midnight to 3 AM).

If I have a nightmare or a bad dream, I am at total liberty to climb into any bed in the house, but of course I make a beeline typically for Mama's bed. She knows nightmares well and she'll simply hold me until I feel safe, and then she'll hold me some more because I get clingy and I don't like letting go. There's been times I've cried because she let me go before I was ready for the cuddle to be over (though those times were when I was much younger) so now she just lets me decide for myself when I've had enough.

With the way I sleep with my hair in two braids, I always get a mass of tangles at the back of my head. Always. I hate it and it always makes me hesitant to brush my hair, which is now midway down my back (so I can’t not brush my hair every day), because I know it’s gonna hurt me. I’ll brush the front parts of my hair and I’ll try to brush the knots out, but it hurts so I stop and I don’t want to brush my hair. 

A part of me is always tempted to just leave it, but at the same time I know from previous experience that hair knots can and will get worse, so during these times I’ll take my brush to Mama. She’s always so gentle, not just with me, but also just in her nature. 

She is such a tender-hearted person and I admire her so deeply for that. She’s incredibly busy so typically I’ll leave brushing my hair until the evening, when she has more time to help me. I don’t always ask her for help with my hair, so when I do, she knows immediately that it’s because I really can’t do it myself.

“Mama, there’s a - I have a knot. Can you help me?”

A small smile and she goes to get her wooden comb. It’s gentler on knots than my own hairbrush, which pulls more than it needs to, and we both know it. Mama is so gentle that it barely hurts me, and within minutes she’s done what I’ve delayed all day.

“How do you want it tonight, Erika? One braid or two?”

I fondly roll my eyes - like she needs to ask. My smile is in my voice as I ask for two, and Mama and I get to spend some time with one another quietly enjoying each other’s company.

Sometimes I return the favour by helping her brush out her hair, but she’s incredibly self-sufficient and she largely prefers to do it herself. Which is fine... I’ll find other ways to help her!😊

“Thank you, Mama.” My words are doubled up with a tight hug, and then I’m ushered off to bed because it’s late and she’s exhausted.

I technically have three parents and each one fulfills a different need for me, so all together, they meet all of my needs and I try, I try to be a daughter that they can be proud of, that they can respect and that they can love unconditionally. I try so hard every day to live in a way to honour their places in my life.

There's nothing I wouldn't do for my parents. I would die for my parents, to give them a happy ending, to give them the time to be together, but in many ways... I am that happy ending, even if things aren't perfect. It's a fight sometimes to keep secrets exactly that, but we make it work. We have to.

I tell them each and every day that I love them, I hug them and cuddle them and help them out where I can, because they deserve the world.

They are my parents and I am very grateful to and for them. They have made me who I am today and they'll be with me forever, no matter where I go or what I do or who I become. I just hope that they'll continue to walk with me for the rest of my life, because I wouldn't be alive without them... in more ways than one.