#i am obsessed with this series already its only been like 3 days

[basil-does-arttt]

GUESS WHO GOT SILENT HILL 2 ENHANCED EDITION TO WORK!!!!

[minhosimthings]

The Fallen One || 18+

Synopsis: For the final day of the pact, you find yourself intoxicated by the man you've yearned for, forever.

Pairings: detective!Jay × fem!reader

Warnings: smut minors Dni, fingering, cock riding, p in v sex, unprotected sex (not for you), reader has like three orgasms?, Jay's just really obsessed, Fluffy in the end, swearing, mention of food and alcohol, final fuck you to Heeseung yay

A/N: I haven't been able to carry out with my og plot in this fic because I, like an idiot, forgot I included bondage and i just wrote everything and now I neither have the heart nor the energy to write anything else, so to all my babies who wanted bondage, there's a fic in my wips for y'all. Anywho I had fun working on this series! Thank you for all the support that got me through writing everything and I hope next time my brain remembers to write WHAT WAS INTENDED IN THE FIRST PLACE-

Series Masterlist

Jay's calloused fingers nudged a mauve hued record back into its place, near and tidy on an oak shelf slightly shorter than him. His eyes travelled to another section of the shelf, where his hands picked up an olive green record, silently sitting at the back, overshadowed by the bright blues that surrounded it.

His mouth stretched into a thin quiet smile as he gently took the vinyl out, admiring its sleek look in the faint light of his bedroom, before he set it to it's position on his record player. Picking up his glass of dark red wine, Jay toyed with the sharp needle of the nostalgia emitting record player, before setting it onto the spinning vinyl.

The sound of stiff bones cracking was heard as he plopped down on his armchair near the warm fireplace, wine in hand, with hypnotising music playing in the background. Sipping his wine, he stared at the fire place, watching as every flame danced to the music, some did the tango, while some did the ballet.

Don't think about her, he thought to himself, anything but her.

Jay sighed heavily to himself as he twirled the last remnants of the wine in his glass, he had no idea how fast he had drunk it. He could hear rain pattering away mercilessly outside whilst the hours ticked away as he waited for tomorrow to come and whisk him away.

The second sigh of the evening dropped seethingly from his mouth as his eyes fluttered over to the picture frames on the wall. He smiled as he ran his eyes over the memories of old, forever remembered in hues and colours, lest they ever leave his mind.

A picture of him and his parents stood proud next to a ridiculous picture of him, Sunghoon and Jake standing next to a lake. He laughed as he recalled how they had fell into the murky water that day, pushing each other in, until everything ended in dirty clothes and raucous laughter. Another picture stood rather drab next to the bright coloured photos of Jay with his boss, recieving an award. The picture was dusty, as if it has been avoided by Jay when he was cleaning it.

Jay's eyes paused at the dust spiders on the picture and he walked near it, peering to see the picture that was held inside the carved frame.

Him, a woman and Heeseung, with smiles imprinted on your faces, against a backdrop of what looked like a school building. Jay gently took the picture of of the wall, it slid easily off the wallpaper, and set it down on the table. If anyone had asked him later on for how long he had stared at it with confused thoughts, he'd have responded with a confused look.

If only she had chosen me, he thought, if only....

The third exhausted sigh came as Jay realised he should probably sleeping, glancing at the clock to notice that it was 3 am in the morning already. He'd only get a few hours of sleep, but something was better was nothing, and for him, three hours of sleep was more than enough. And if it was on his beloved armchair next to a cozy fire? He might as well have announced Christmas dinner.

Jay plopped onto his armchair once more, now folding up his legs to snuggle into the seat, all warm next to the crackling fire, with the sound of rain making him drift off to sleep.

He made sure, by whatever ill will, to glance at the dusty picture he set on the table once more, peer at the intoxicating smile of the woman, and the man next to her, his arm wrapped around her waist protectively. Jay thought his face looked rather sour in the picture, the memories of it were even sourer but dawn was no time to think of them.

And so he went off to sleep at last, fighting off troubled thoughts and an uneasy heart.

If only she had chosen me.

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

"Where did you say Y/N was staying again?" Sunghoon looked up from his pile of paperwork to answer the questioning voice.

"Baker's Street." He answered in his usual condescending voice, "Why do you ask?"

Jay shrugged in response to his friend's question, quickly pretending to be interested in his own pile of paperwork, though Sunghoon was quick to notice the tiny smile dancing on his lips. "Jongsoeng don't tell me you're going to do anything stupid."

"You're telling that to me?" Jay laughed, which came out more like a scoff, "I'll be fine."

"Don't buy her cake like I did." Jake commented from the other side, a pen stuck behind his ear, "Unless you want Mr Fuck Up over there to intervene." He lowered his voice with the last words, glaring towards Heeseung, who was working on the other side of the office.

Jay hadn't exactly been careful all day around Heeseung, treating him normally, though he did make sure to amplify his voice when speaking your name. Such as now, when he had asked Sunghoon where you were staying. He had no intention to make Heeseung jealous or anything. No, he had a firm desire to make Heeseung jealous and angry.

"Jay can I talk to you for a second?"

Speak of the devil.

Jay looked up from his paperwork (quick to change his expression from annoyed to normal) to see Heeseung staring at him with a weird look.

"I need to talk to you." Heeseung repeated, causing Jay to internally cringe. "What about?" Jay asked, to which Heeseung looked around before grabbing Jay's arms and dragging him (against his will) to the empty break room.

"I need to talk about—" Heeseung paused, taking a breath, "—about Y/N."

"What about her?" Jay asked, voice remaining calm, though his knuckles were certainly gripping the edge of the table he leant on, very tightly, "She's doing well, if you wanted to ask."

"Jay come on." Heeseung sighed, "I know about this little pact between you guys and Y/N and–" he fiddled with his fingers, "I know I've had some downs, but I really need to apologise to Y/N. I've ditched Yeo-Hee anyway, and–" he chuckled, "–can we not let bygones be bygones?"

"Bygones be bygones?" Jay let out a cold laugh, the expression on his face was terrifying and though Heeseung wouldn't have admitted it, he was scared, "Since when have you been using that phrase? Since high school I reckon?" Jay laughed again, "Ahh fuck I don't even understand why she even kept up with your cheating ass for so long. Tell me Heeseung," he leaned forward to look Heeseung menacingly in the eye, "Did you ever really love her?"

"Love her?" Heeseung responded, "Of course I love her, she's my wif-"

"Then will you tell her about Ji-ah from the other section or should I?"

"You wouldn't." Heeseung stared Jay down, though he was taller and older than him, he felt as if a hurricane was interrogating him, "Jay you can't. You know she'll never forgive me."

"She shouldn't." Jay laced his words with venom, "She should never forgive a fucking bastard like you."

"Ok fine." Heeseung sighed, "Can you atleast tell her I'm sorry?"

"Tell her yourself, coward." Jay quipped, which perhaps was a mistake, when he looked at Heeseung's angry expression.

"Coward?" Heeseung laughed, "Wouldn't that be more fitting for you, Jongsoeng?" He stepped forward, "If you hadn't been a coward with poor heartbroken 16 year old Y/N, we probably wouldn't be here and I'd be thankful I hadn't ever dated that bitch."

Heeseung couldn't comprehend what has happened in the next few moments. All he could recall if you had asked him now what happened, was a loud thud, his back against a wall, Jay's cat like eyes becoming deadly and Jake and Sunghoon's shocked faces.

"Don't you call her that, you insipid jackass." Jay snarled at the older man, with his hands gripping the collar of Heeseung's shirt tightly, whilst pressing him to the wall, "Don't you ever call her anything less than what you fucking are. A coward, and a cheat." Jay released his grip on Heeseung's shirt with a guffaw, before stepping out of the room, leaving behind an air of tension and fear.

|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|•|

Your eyes scanned the room nervously, as you eased into the maroon hued armchair. The anxiety you held within you at the moment, was easily captured by the way you were fiddling with your fingers and biting your bottom lip until you tasted iron in your mouth.

It's just Jay, you reminded yourself, the man you've had a crush on since forever, it's just him.

"Keep biting that lip of yours and you're going to lose it." Jay chuckled, walking in with mugs of tea in his hand, "Still haven't lost that habit have you doll?"

"Well with you no longer there to remind me–" you graciously accepted the mug, noting carefully how his fingers brushed against yours, "–its become an addiction."

"Well, I'll make sure to write to you everyday not to bite your lip." He joked, making you laugh. God he looked heavenly, you thought, figure clad in his loose white button up, the one he wore to work, combined with a blue trouser which framed his thighs perfectly.

"You-you look good." You said, in a timid fashion, making Jay look up from his mug and smile at you.

"As do you, doll." He grinned. The cocoons in your stomach erupted into a thousand butterflies at the nickname. It was what he used to call you in high school, mainly to tease you, and partly (or rather secretly) to compliment your beauty.

"Heeseung asked me to apologise to you." Jay chuckled coldly, interrupting your train of thoughts, "Bastard came up to me at work and just bombarded me with requests." He looked up at you before continuing, "He wants you to know that he's broken up with the other girl, Yeo-Hee or whoever."

"Oh." You responded, not exactly knowing what a good response would be, "Well—good, I guess." You said, not adding anything until a few minutes of silence passed, "Does the idiot really think he can get me back with a simple apology?"

"He does." Jay set his mug down on the table, easing into his chair, "If it were me, I'd have written a thousand pages of poetry for you."

"You wouldn't have ever done what he did."

"Wouldn't I?" Jay's eyes perked up at you, shadowed with a kind of darkness you've never seen before.

"No you wouldn't." You responded, "I know you wouldn't, you're too...perfect for that."

"Perfect?" Jay laughed mockingly, "Y/N if I were perfect, we wouldn't be in this situation–" he didn't know where his words were coming from, "–and you'd have never married that fucker!"

Jay's sudden amplified voice made you flinch, you had heard that voice on only one occasion before and it was not a pretty thing to hear at all.

"Jay....."

"I'm sorry." Jay sighed, running his hand through his hair, "This is a mistake–I'll drop you off at home if you don't want this anymore-"

"Oh my God, you're an idiot." You said, stopping Jay's rambling and causing him to look up at you with confused eyes, "Do you really think I'll skip this just because you raised your voice?"

"No I meant–" Jay sighed again, getting up from his armchair suddenly and packing around the room, a habit he had from childhood, "–I know things aren't really sunshine and rainbows between us, and you probably don't feel comfy fucking someone who's been with you since high school so–fuck I'm rambling." He mumbled the last part under his breath, taking a deep breath, before continuing, "Y/N, what I want to say is–I'm sorry." He looked at you again, "I'm sorry for not being good enough for you, but please–" he knelt down in front of you, so you could be at eye level, "–forgive me, if you still can."

"Oh my god you idiotic dunce." You laughed at him, causing his expression to change to one of confusion.

Jay didn't have time to register what happened next, the only feeling his mind knew was the touch of your soft, familiar lips on his, the mere atoms that existed between you, now faded away as you ravaged each other, each attempt to get closer, an attempt of love and confusion.

"Fuck, doll," he groaned, your foreheads leaning against one another, his hands gripping the fabric on your waist. You looked up into his eyes, witnessing the inner battle reflected in his gaze as he grappled with the decision to restrain himself or not.

"Fuck it." He finally said, grabbing your face with his hands and pulling you towards him for yet another kiss.

He kissed you like he was dying, his body subconsciously reacting more to the kiss then he’d wish it to. He pulled your flush against him, his strong hands coming to cup your face, his shoulders shrugging in a futile attempt to have you closer. Jay opened his mouth, causing you to gasp at the feeling of his tongue against yours. Your mouth moved with his as if it was known to you; As if this was a dance you had practiced for years to perfect, as if the dance of your lips was a song that Jay had mastered just for you. 

"Jay I-" you hesitated for a moment, what if he didn't say it back?, "I love you." His eyes—the color of an intoxicating champagne—beckoned you over with nothing more than a tired smile.

"Oh sweetheart," Jay's hand brushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear, "You have no idea how long I've been wanting to hear that."

His mouth hesitantly chased yours until you brushed your fingers through his hair and pulled him towards you, finally connecting your lips again. His touch was gentle, almost like he wanted to be careful with you. Yet, you wanted to breathe him in—lustfully addicted to the taste of his lips.

His palms laid flat against the curvature of your back whilst your hands grabbed at his collar, pulling him flush against you—the throbbing between your legs did anything but lessen with the close proximity.

Jay had never before tasted something sweeter; your saccharine lips fit so perfectly against his—he was convinced that they were made for him to kiss and caress. His cock stirred in his pants for he could only wonder how divine your cunt would taste on his tongue. Jay needed it all. he trailed his fingers up your front, pinning the fabric of his shirt over your tits. His fingertips dance across your skin as he detached his lips from yours.

"Wait Y/N–" Jay pulled away, leaving you chasing after him, "Are you sure you want this?"

"Yes," You breathed, pressing a kiss to his lips, "Fuck yes I want this."

Jay needed no more words from you as his fingers tangled in your hair, pulling you closer as he deepened the kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck, as you kissed him back, your heart pounding in your chest.

"Wait a minute love." Jay mumbled into your ear. Slipping his arms beneath you, he lifted you into his arms, his hands squeezing your ass as you wrapped your legs around his hips and your arms round his neck for support. Jay led you to the adjacent room, presumably his bedroom, setting you down with care on his bed.

As soon as you were settled on the mattress, Jay's senses ravaged on you. His hands grabbed your face, pulling your lips against his in a passionate kiss. You could taste the bitterness in his mouth, perhaps from an afternoon shot of bourbon, the familiar scent of his cologne filling your senses. Jay's hands moved down your body, tracing the curves of your hips as he pulled you closer. As Jay's hands continued to explore your body, you couldn't help but sigh. "fuck Jay."

"Shh doll." Jay shushed you, "Let me take care of you, yeah?"

Your clothes quickly fell to a pile on the floor, and Jay's lips found your neck, leaving a trail of sweet but rough kisses. His touch was urgent and passionate, a release of the pent-up energy that had been building up all day.

Soon, he was pushing your underwear to the side, revealing your slick folds to him. The warm atmosphere of the room kissed your cunt with a breeze, eliciting a shallow gasp from you.

"Wet for me already, doll?" Jay smirked, his eyes travelling up and down your body, as if he was a saint worshiping his patron goddess. His low chuckle vibrated throughout your entire being, sending you into that same state you were in when you drank the aphrodisiac at Sunghoon's house. It was pathetic on your part that Jay had managed to get you like this without so much as sticking his fingers in you.

"Jay stop teasing-“ the words die on your tongue and you gasp for air, fingers pulling at his soft locks as he prods his fingers at your entrance. Your cunt sucked him in with ease—his long fingers fucking deep into your pussy. Your hand swiftly gripped the edge of the bedsheet until he placed his hand over yours—gently intertwining your fingers while you arch your back in pleasure.

Jay leaves one final kiss to your lips before leaning back and forcing your knee down with his left hand. He was locked in a trance, watching the way your pussy would gush every time his fingers would pump inside of you. His fingers rapidly disappeared past your folds as you cried out.

Your hands frailly clawed at his wrist, only to be swatted away while he kept his pace—eyes trained on your precious cunt.

With parted lips, you brought your gaze down to glance his fingers as they were buried knuckle-deep inside of you, you couldn’t even hint for him to stop, not that you wanted him to anyway. How could you? With the way he was beginning to curl his fingers forward, pushing against your slick walls, it was nearly impossible to push him away. The feeling alone forced a chain of whimpers from your mouth, only encouraging him to do more.

He continued to fuck you with his fingers, pushing and pulling them out of you with a growing sense of urgency. Eventually, he was leaning down to connect his lips with your nipple before beginning to suck on the sensitive bud with haste.

"Jay—ahhh." You draw out a raspy moan, feeling his tongue circle around your nipple, "Jay I—"

But before you could even finish your sentence, your larynx was screaming out his name like it was gospel, as you came messily all over his fingers. Jay smirked, as he gazed at your beautiful, fucked out face, his dick positively bursting from how much he wanted to absolutely ruin you.

"Eyes on me, doll." Jay commanded, you moved your pupils to face him. He looked absolutely breathtaking, towering above you. You winced as his fingers dug deep into your waist, he lifted you up with ease and propped you on top of him. Your positions were now switched, and you had no idea what to do.

"Go ahead and take my pants off." He told you. You happily obliged, your fingers were practically scrambling to unzip his pants, as you tore them off of his legs, revealing the cause of his earlier bulge. You hum at the sight of his cock, licking your lips as you swipe a thumb over the angry red tip, spreading a bead of precum over it, causing Jay to let out an almost inaudible moan.

"Now—" Jay sighed, hard enough from the feeling of your fingers on his length, "Be a good girl and ride my cock."

Your eyes widened at his words. You were delighted, of course, at the mere prospect of having his dick to yourself. Unfortunately for you, you had no idea how to tell him you didn't know how to do what he wanted you to do.

"I can't." You mumbled underneath your breath, causing Jay to chuckle.

"Speak up sweetheart, I can't hear you."

"I don't know to do it!" You said, more agressively than you had intended to say it. But Jay just laughed again, this time it was more of a mocking one than amused.

"Oh sweetheart." He extended a hand up to your face, cupping your cheek, his hand was warmer than your face so you melted into his touch, "Want me to help you?"

You did nothing but simply nod, feeling slightly ashamed and slightly insecure about the fact that your brain was telling you, you've disappointed him.

"What's going on in that brain of yours hmm?" Jay grabbed your hips pulling you down onto his stomach, "Scared, doll?"

"No���no!" You panicked, "It's just that—what if I don't...do it correct?"

"Doll, do you really think I'd be mad at that?" Jay raised a brow at you, which quickly turned into a expression of concern, "Did Heeseung ever do that to you?"

"Sometimes." You mumbled underneath your breath, "He'd get mad at me if I didn't know."

"Fucking bastard." Jay said, his hands gripped your hips tighter, as his eyes wandered all over your body. He couldn't bring himself to even comprehend how Heeseung could have behaved like that with you.

"I-I do know some things." You started, adjusting your body on Jay's stomach, "I know how to—" you paused, "—get on."

You felt your cheeks heat up rapidly as you internally slapped your forehead. Jay chuckled at your embarrassed expression, hands still digging into your hip.

"Alright then." Jay said, freeing his hands from your body, "Go on."

Sighing, Jay lies back down, hips going still. You shift yourself so that your pussy is lined up with his cock, using a hand to brush the tip against your folds, never going further than that. Jay lets out a whimper at the teasing sensation.

"Fuck doll—don't tease..." Jay sighs in pleasure, as you lift yourself up, hands on either of his shoulders. Both of you let out a collective, satisfied moan as you slowly sink down on his length, feeling it stretch open your cunt slow and steady. Jay groaned again as you gripped him tighter to balance yourself. His hands found their way back to your hips.

"shhh." Jay's big hands continued to roam around your body, one landing on the small of your back and the other massaging and cupping your tits. He used his hand on your back to push you down further.

"breathe, love, i'll help you." when you finally sank all the way down onto his cock, when Jay was finally buried balls-deep in your pretty little pussy, it felt so amazing because you were so so full.

No one had ever been so deep inside you. His cock was kissing your cervix, and it had your pussy clenching down on him so tightly that you thought it might be a little hard to move.

“Fuck.” You lift your hips, and slowly ease yourself down again. Lustful whimpers and moans escaped you as you slowly repeated your motions, feeling almost dizzy at the way his big cock was stretching you out. His dick felt so fucking good; hot and throbbing and aching to burst inside you.

Throwing whatever scrap of inhibition you have left, you raise your lower body before roughly slamming your ass back down. The harsh movement makes you cry out in pleasure. You start to move eagerly, not holding back any of your movements.

Once you got started, you couldn't stop the rhythm — up and down up and down up and down — until your vision began to blur from how fucking good it felt. His cock hits deep inside you, stretching out your tight little hole with every bounce.

Jay's view from below you was incredible. tits bouncing, head flung back, and moans pornographic — it was all enough to drive a man mad. he couldn't keep his hands off of you. whether they were gripping at your thighs to keep you warm on his dick, or gripping and pinching at your nipples, or running them over your back hard enough to leave scratch marks, they were constantly in motion — worshipping your beautiful body.

"You're so—fuck—pretty." Jay cooed at you, ignoring the sharp pain on his shoulders with how you were digging your nails into his skin, "be a good doll for me now."

You were straddling him, your head thrown back with both hands on his shoulders as you tried to keep a quick pace. He had his hands pressed deep into your hips, helping you move in a fluid motion. You felt him hit your sweet spot every time you made your way down, letting out tiny whimpers at the feeling.

"Fuck doll—" Jay moaned, he was loving the way you were using him for you own pleasure, "G-Good girl, you're a good girl for me aren't you?"

You couldn’t hold in the loud moan you had been holding in for a long time, feeling your stomach flutter at his words. You felt a slight burning in your thighs and you knew Jay's shoulders held tiny crescent shapes from how tight your grip had become. You felt one of Jay's hands move to your clit, rubbing small circles on the bundle of nerves.

A pathetic whimper escaped your lips as you felt a familiar fire burn in your core, edging ever closer as you drove yourself to the end of the tunnel. It didn't help that Jay perked his hips up, practically slamming his tip into the deepest crevices of your pussy and driving you insane as you finally came down.

Your moans grow louder, echoing on the walls as you feel the impending climax. "I'm cumming! Oh god, don't stop!" Each word is punctuated by a sharp intake of breath and a quivering sensation throughout your body. Your pussy gripped tightly around him, milking his cock with every thrust. Your legs tremble and your body shivers, wracked with pleasure as your orgasm crashes over you. "Fuck, I’m cumming!”

Gazing at your drunken being, Jay took the opportunity to harshly grab your hips, and bring you down underneath him. Your back hit the mattress roughly, as you felt nothing but his cum still in your walls.

You were awoken out of your cock-drunk stupor by the harmonious taste of Jay's lips, as he kissed you, his hands circling your breasts

His neck muscles strained as he deepened the kiss. You broke the kiss as you looked down at him, your breathing uneven. The low lighting making him look absolutely ravishing. Freshly kissed lips made them redder as his eyes droopy from the lust behind them, looking at you.

"Jay please..." You trailed off, feeling exhausted from the expert riding lesson.

"Please what doll?" Jay chuckles into your neck, his tip teasing your labia. "Jay–need—your cock." You throat out. The room felt like it was spinning at a fast rate as Jay chuckled again. His cologne was like poison to you, wrapping you in tight corridors of pleasure and pain.

"Fuck, you're such a dumb doll for me aren't you?” he prompts, moving closer. He spits into his hand, pumping the moisture over his cock before positioning himself above you. You whimper as his tip touches your labia, he wasn't giving you what you wanted anytime soon, and you were getting impatient.

"Jay—" you say his name like a prayer your tongue had memorised, "—Jay, please..."

"Dumb fucking doll." Jay muttered under his breath, gripping your chin with his two fingers. He went in for a filthy, messy kiss, before you were cry out, the feeling of him pushing into you driving you mad.

Taking his dick between one hand, Jay slapped your ass in the other as he rubbed out the red imprint beginning to spread beneath his fingers. You vulnerably flinched at the feeling, letting a low moan out as you squeezed your eyes shut.

Rubbing his sensitive tip against your pussy, he hissed through his teeth at the feeling before lining himself up with your entrance. Holding your hips in his hands, he gripped his fingers on your skin as he pushed himself inside of you between your folds, equally pulling your hips back on his cock, your warmth instantly wrapping around him as your lips parted at the feeling, letting a moan out into the bed.

Waves of pleasure accompany the sting of the stretch, and your eyes flutter as he rocks slowly into you. He’s watching the way his cock splits you open, low grunts coming from deep in his chest. He shifts, one hand pressing on your lower stomach, thumb swirling over your clit. you cry out, head falling back onto the pillows. The other hand lifts one of your legs, pushing it towards your chest.

"Jay–ah-ahh" You moaned loudly, holding onto his biceps and burying your face into the crook of his neck. His hand slid in between your bodies, reaching down to your clit and rubbing rough circles, increasing the immense amount of pleasure you were experiencing.

Jay’s thrusting became faster, harder, like a man starved. His grasp on your chin returned to your hips. As Jay rolled back slightly, sitting on his knees, he brought your hips to meet his, your back still on the bed. From this angle he has full control over your body, not that he hadn’t before. But now he could control his thrusts, making them sharper, harder. Beneath him, your eyes screw shut in pleasure, consumed by his ministrations. You look beautiful like this, he thought.

Cheeks red, hair a mess, sweat glistening on your skin, he had been a fool not to have claimed you as his before. His wife, he thought, his and his only. "Ohh fuck!" You whined, feeling Jay's cock drill into you, hitting that perfect spot in your tight cunt. You were powerless underneath him, his balls slapping against your pussy with each thrust, his hands snaking around your thighs to wrap your legs around his waist as he pounded into you. He groaned in pleasure, leaning down and softly nibbling your earlobe,

"god, you're fucking amazing." His eyes gleamed with satisfaction as he picked up the pace, his cock slamming into you with increasing intensity. He was merciless, taking what he wanted, dominating your body perfectly.

Jay's fingers dig deeper into my skin as he pounds into you, his dick was slamming against your most sensitive spot with every thrust. His hands slide up your back, his fingers tangling in your hair as he pulls my head back

"you're gonna look so pretty when you're all full of me, doll," he moans out and grabs your hips tightly with his rough hands, holding you in place as he slams into you.

Jay's hand slides from your hip to your clit, his fingers rubbing against it in slow, deliberate circles. You moan, your body trembling beneath him as he continues to thrust into you, his thick cock filling you completely.

His fingers move faster, his touch becoming more insistent as he rubs your clit, his movements matching the rhythm of his hips.

You feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge, your body trembling with every touch, every thrust. Jay's breath is hot against your ear, his voice husky with desire as he whispers sweet nothings against your skin.

You came hard and threw your eyes back, twisting your body and separating yourself from Jay's mouth in a desperate search for air. His chest was heaving, his skin was flushed and sweaty, your sex was still eagerly sucking the other's length that kept burying itself to the bottom in you, and then leaving and entering again as if it were predestined for that.

"Fuck, you're so hot." Jay moaned loudly, as he felt your pussy suffocate his length, "Fuck—you want my cum sweetheart?"

"Jay—oh fuck!" You gasped loudly, "N-Need your cum–please."

Jay groaned, you saw his Adam's apple protrude in his throat and you gasped, feeling him move slightly in your pussy.

"that's it doll, cum for me, fuck—just like that." He drawled out in a lazy whisper.

Jay rested his forehead on your collarbone and let out several low moans before cumming inside you. After recovering from the orgasm, he stood up again between your legs with a sigh, looked at your union dripping with fluids and came out of you, putting the semen that flowed from your entrance back inside with his fingers, making sure that everything stayed trapped inside you.

A painful emptiness was left in you when Jay slowly pulled out, with a train of curses escaping from his mouth, as he lay down next to you. You both lay in silence, with the only sound being the sound of your laboured breathing.

"So—" Jay broke the silence, "—what now?"

"What now?" You asked the same question back, with a slight chuckle as Jay smiled at you, "Do you want to get up or do you want to stay here for some more time?"

"I'd prefer the latter." He answered, scooting himself closer to you, "Unless you want to take a bath?"

You hummed in response, taking the invite to wrap yourself in his arms. Evidently, neither of you were interested in leaving the bedroom.

"Jay?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"I love you too doll."

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[justbelievinginmagic]

like a waltz⎯ part 3: emboîté.

pairing(s): ateez ot8 x fem!reader; this chapter is heavily woosan x reader with some reader x yeosang & reader x hongjoonnngggg. series summary: when 8 mysterious bachelors arrive to town and fall for your charms, will you be able to reach your goal to be prima ballerina or be dragged into a selfish waltz between love and obsession? glimpse: Having a patron for the first time in your ballet career, you knew things would change but certainly not so fast. With your dues paid, extra change in your pocket, you are slowly pulled into Wooyoung and San's orbit - outside of the ballet opera house! warnings/tags: inspired by Ateez’s Ice on my Teeth MV & Teasers, Mafia AU, Ballet AU, early 1900’s AU with some divergences in tech advancements (i.e if i think itd be cool to include, this world has it earlier than irl), 3rd person POV, use of YN, mxm, polyteez, MATURE topics, allusions to sex work in ballet, allusions to exploitation in ballet, implied sexual themes, stalking, voyeurism kinda, guns, strong language, angst, fluff, flirting, suggestive topics, lies, manipulation, medical drugs, traumatic foot injury, unequal power dynamics, injuries, alcohol, smoking, lots of smooches, threatening situations, pain, reader discretion advised, +18 readers only. let me know if there are any more tags i should add. a/n: hi! another chapter im posting and running away from lol. it took so long to edit this chapter and i am so sleepy. this chapter had developed far from its timeline. im happy with the beats butttttt i had wanted to add in more yunho and jongho by this point but it was feeling a smidge rushed. next chapter will have some yunho for sure!! let me know what you thought!! word count: 15.9k previous chapter <- -> next chapter series masterlist

emboîté ; french pronunciation: [em·​boî·​té]; ‘fit together’

Things had changed after that night.

Not only were her ballet company fees paid each week with a check bearing the prettiest signature from San’s hand, but, soon after, Wooyoung had invited her out on an outing. As in, outside.

Outside of the ballet. Outside of work. Outside of being the role of patron and protégé.

“He asked you to go out of the ballet house?  Julia with the red hair queried with a cocked brow, uncertainty in her tone.

It made a flicker of worry cross over the YN’s face as she stretched, preparing for the triple show they had that day. But, that was short lived as one of the loudest gossipers known to man chimed in with a screech.

“You’re going on a date?!” Tiny exclaimed, sliding into the conversation in a dramatic splits.

Her eyes were lit up like spotlights, loving the new development for her favorite ballerina to bug. The young girl kicked her feet in excitement, the noise drawing the attention of the other ballerinas warming up – if they hadn’t already been drawn in by her screeching.

A date she had said.

No, no, no. Dates were for romance and this wasn’t … Was he seeking romance? He was her patron… or well, he and San were. In itself, that was odd according to the other proteges. Sharing a protégé… never ended well. Typically, it failed within a few days. Jealousy, envy, annoyance, lack of money. Usually, they have all of that as they leave the budding ballerina in the dust, without a penny.

But Wooyoung did flirt with her. Wooyoung hadn’t suggested being her patron, not really, even if he had visited for nearly a month and a half religiously. San had. Wooyoung did press the occasional kiss to her cheek. He did… like her, he had said so. But didn’t all patrons say that. Was it more? Could it even be more if she wanted it to be? Why did the idea of a date with him send butterflies fluttering in her stomach, icy hot excitement coursing through her veins. Giddy.

But, she’s seen each ballerina with a patron fall into this. The idea it was something more. Julia, Mina, Imara, Lali, even the current belladonna of the ballet – the prima ballerina – had once thought her patron was her love. And it had always been proven wrong.

“It’s an outing,” she insisted to the others. For her own heart.

“It’s a date!” the younger screeched again. “What are you wearing?” her hands slapped to the wood floor.

She hadn’t even thought of that! Oh gosh. What did she have that could even impress? She’d wear her pearls, of course. But what of her dress? What was the newest thing nowadays? Was it rouging your knees? Or the Gibson Girl hairdo? Was that out of style? Was she out of style once she was out of her scandalous costumes and caked on make-up? Most things YN had were upcycled from scraps, occasionally the old costume the costumier discarded, or her mother’s old dresses revitalized by embroidery. It wasn’t anything like the ladies of the upper class with their haute couture from far beyond here. She could doll a dress up with some flowers she supposed. 

“Don’t wear anything red!” another girl exclaimed, revealing herself to be listening in. “Red is bad luck.”

“No, its good luck,” one ballerina said aside.

“Wearing black will look like you’re mourning,” said another older girl while applying her rouge.

“But he always sees you in white, so don’t wear that,” chimed in another.

So, the entire ballet knew apparently about her date now and all of them were listening in and giving advice. Theirs words overlapped one another in conflicting, contrasting advice.

“Wear what you like,” Imara insisted from nearby. The long-featured ballerina offered a reassuring nod.

“Is this normal?” YN queried quietly towards her, although, it wasn’t for an attempt of privacy. Every girl was listening and watching her now with keen eyes.

The few girls with patrons glanced at one another, brows raised.

“I’ve never been invited out of the boudoir,” Julie said firmly, glancing aside as she leaned into a stretch. “And its not wise to be out and about with them.”

“Nor I,” Mina agreed.

“So, it’s…” YN trailed off with a furrowed brow. “Strange?”

“Kid,” Julie sighed out; her tone making YN feel like a child, begrudgingly and uncomfortably so. She hated not being trusted to make choices. Belittled. Underestimated.

“Everything about you and your new patrons is strange. Their appearance in town, them both sharing you… you.”

It felt backhanded; like she wasn’t anything special. It reminded her about how so many thought she wasn’t worthy simply because she was the eldest of the ensemble, simply because she hadn’t risen to starlet yet.

Yet now she had two patrons. No one had that. For once, she nipped that feeling of oddness, of nervousness, of embarrassed scrutiny about her relationship with Wooyoung and, now, San in the bud, and refused to let it bother her. She’d embrace it she said. She was special. She was special. This was special. Even if it wasn’t a date… It was just an outing. He hadn’t said date. It was an outing, she proclaimed. Not a date… an outing. Or was it a date? It drove her mad, her thoughts going in circles just like her own pirouettes on stage. Just like her stomach when he touched her oh so sweetly.

He wanted to see her more though… that’s all that matter, right?

-

San and Wooyoung were attached at the hip when they were in the boudoir. They walked through the Opera House like they owned the place. And while their movements weren’t in sync, they flowed into one another easily like they could read one another’s minds. Wooyoung would flitter this way and that around San, talking about anything, but San would redirect him, hands on his shoulders or lithe waist, and smile in agreement.

As they approached her in the boudoir, she heard the very-end of their conversation.

“I swear, if it were you, it’d be done like that,” Wooyoung encouraged as he snapped his fingers in emphasis.

“Wooyo,” he hummed low, smiling at him fondly. Dimples pierced his cheeks. His arm swept over the other’s shoulders, squeezing him close. “I’m done with all that. Captain’s orders.” It was a firm reminder. Steady.

“Captain’s orders,” Wooyoung mimicked back, sneering a bit. “Captain is keeping his best fighter ou-“ his words trailed off as his sights were set on his ballerina. No longer in her tutu but in her ordinary clothes. “Swanette! You’re already in your dresses.”

“Disappointed?” she teased and flirted.

She had hurried tonight – hoping to finish wiggling out of her costume before their arrival. San swinging by the bar to grab his customary drink had given her a smidge more time. Her body ached more than ever. Her legs felt crackly and pained. Her head pounded with worry. It’d been a long day and, with the ever-present chill in the boudoir, she worried she was getting sick. And she couldn’t get sick… ever.

Wooyoung insisted on her to spin, gesturing in reverence, as if she was still dressed up in dripping fake jewels. Her day-dress was a simple frock – a dark black drop skirt with embroidered berries at the hem. Her hair was still in it’s too tight bun, but she had grown used to it now after two shows. It didn’t help her headache she was sure but, alas, she did what she could in the time she had.

She spun in a gentle circle, only to easily get swept into Wooyoung’s arms.

“Gorgeous as always,” Wooyoung whispered, his cheek pressed against hers almost like a cat nuzzling their owner to claim possession of them. His warmed cheek squished and nuzzled, hot minty breath wafting over her.

“And disappointed? Never, because we can steal you away for the rest of the night now,” he hummed into her ear before pressing a quick peck to her temple, nearly catching the corner of her eye. She shivered in surprise. Kisses were still new and sent her heart racing and body trembling.

He pulled back, hands rubbing up and down her goosefleshed arms. “Chilly, baby?”

Baby! Her eyes widened in surprise. If only he knew! San laughed nearby, drawing her eyes.

“Hel-Hello, San,” she greeted, flushed and smiling.

San nodded, smiling so sweet that his dimples remained on display. They looked like cat whiskers in the golden gas-light of the boudoir.

“Hello, honey. Beautiful performance… You tired?” he drawled out.

San always asked these questions since his arrival in the boudoir. He was utterly observant. He was caring and kind and all things sweet despite his looming almost dangerous aura. It made her feel safe as Wooyoung shifted her this way and that, half dragging her along to a nearby settee. San followed along, hands reaching into his pockets to pull out and light a cigarette. The flame of his custom lighter illuminated his face for a brief moment before he pulled the cigarette away, eyes shut as he inhaled deeply.

His brows furrowed; his face statuesque. Beautiful. He was so beautiful. Her heart thrummed as she felt Wooyoung’s chin rest on her shoulder, bringing her back to her body.

“I’m okay,” she replied, voice forcibly light. She was tired; he had hit it on the nail. But, the other ballerinas warned against telling their patron that. Any truth about exhaustion, sickness, health. Tired ballerinas get hurt. Hurt ballerinas are a waste of money.

Blowing smoke out aside, he watched her carefully as Wooyoung plopped down, dragging her down to sit beside him. He took another puff of his cigarette.

“Honest?” he pressed once more, smoke billowing from his mouth.

She didn’t answer him, but instead pressed hand to the spot next to her.

“Join me?” she asked as he stood hovering above them, almost protectively shielding them from view.

Wooyoung watched their interaction with intrigue. He knew his San. He knew how strategic he was – in different ways from the rest of his ‘brothers.’ San’s gaze was a force of nature, his form accompanying it as he leaned over them ‘til he and she were eye and eye. Slow and steady. He did not sit yet. He pulled the cigarette from his lips. YN flinched gently, preparing for him to blow his smoke in her face. Some boys got a laugh out of that, rude and crass. But the smoke seeped from his nose like a dragon, slow and controlled, as he kept eye contact with her sincerely, if not a bit intense.

“YN. Honesty, please.” San encouraged. “If I’m asking, I am interested.”

Wooyoung squeezed her waist. “Sannie doesn’t pull punches; he likes no nonsense. He’s…soft like that.”

It was a tease.

“I’m not soft,” he retorted to Wooyoung, smile returning, before his gaze settled back on YN. “I care.” He emphasized.

Her lips pressed together, glancing about the boudoir. The other girls had warned her not to. Everything – even in the boudoir – was a show, just as much as the ballet was a show. But here he stood, staring with soft brown eyes. Gentle yet burning brown eyes.

He says he cares.

When had she and her patrons followed the unspoken rules anyways.

“I’m a bit tired; my--,” she admitted, quietly before glancing aside. “The cold doesn’t help the joints.”

His eyes warmed, pleased, as he ground out his cigarette into the polished wood floors without a care in the world before he sat, sandwiching her in-between him and Wooyoung. Closer than he had ever been. He was so warm like a furnace.

“Our girl is so cold,” San frowned. “We can’t have that.”

Her cool skin worried him, and he joined Wooyoung in warming her up with soft touches and a close embrace. Her cheeks were a rubied red at their shared attention. Wooyoung and San’s eyes locked above her head. Wooyoung had a flare of surprise in them before he smirked.

“I don’t know,” Wooyoung jested, glancing at her rosy cheek. His finger rose to stroke it delicately. “She looks warm to me.”

Her cheeks warmed ever more and she hid into the one she was more comfortable with after weeks of meetings. Her face pressed into Wooyoung’s expensive suit that smelt of a tangy-woodsy mix of Wooyoung and San’s colognes intertwined. San grinned at her actions. He liked her blush. Like how she let them make her blush so helplessly.  

“We’ll just have to warm you up, honey.”

While the rest of the night was full of fleeting touches, they maintained one truth: respect. San was careful with her, always meeting her gaze before touching over her arms, her waist. Wooyoung was more lax, pressing kisses to her cheek every so often; each one sent her stomach into a whirl, and heat burned at her face.

They certainly warmed her up.

-

Walking home was always a cautious event. Performances took hours and, after entertaining San and Wooyoung in the boudoir, it was late into the evening. Even if they encouraged her to leave earlier than usual, it was deep into nightfall.

In the chill of winter, the walk felt longer. Previously, on some nights, Wooyoung would insist on taking her home, but, once San joined him in attending the shows, it seemed they left together most times. She wondered if they had an automobile… or did they take a carriage? She imagined a car. Something sleek and metallic. Leather interiors with that new polished smell.

And warm.

Her body trembled as she continued her path, hugging her old coat closer to her body. She was hyperaware, glancing this way and that as she exited the prettied town-center with their big banks, busied offices, shiny nickelodeons, and grand opera house. Her side of town was less glamourous with its stacked upon stacked apartment buildings, looming factories suffocating the last remaining cozy homesteads, and broken cobblestone streets. The scent of smoke and smog and gasoline overpowered the light aroma of winter breaking through the city of Cromer.

While the town center quieted in the evening, the streets around home never did. There were folks walking to and from work; some went to the mines or docks for early shifts; others were crawling out of darkening bars with the reek of alcohol on their mouths. Alley-ways shifted with figures and shadows. It wasn’t unusual.

So, she had to be aware as she wandered between flame-lit lamp lights and crossed busied streets. When there was a commotion that sounded frightening, she’d jump and quicken her steps. But, even she eventually grew lazy, grew comfortable, as she saw her apartment front. Quaint despite its chipping paint and old bricks.

A wrought-iron fence kept the small shared garden of the multistoried complex private; the dirt was barren with the chill of winter inching in and less time from the occupants of the apartment to spare with their new jobs in factories. Not many were able to work from home, like her mother had once done with her mending business. Still, it was weeded and prepped from spring when it did come.

The newest edition was the mismatched, criss-crossing collection of wires and cords that decorated the exterior of the building. Trailing in and out of each apartment’s windows and down its façade in a haphazard mess. With those ugly wires came electricity. Electricity, that admittedly was a new cost that was difficult to find the coin for and was often unusable from blown fuses across the crowded streets. But, seeing her bedroom window lit with an electric lamp, warm and waiting, made her sigh out in relief. Home. Comfort. Warmth.

Distracted, she never noticed the tall figure trailing her. Not close, no, he was far from her, but he was watching her. A sparkle in his grin grew as he saw her own smile light up at the sight of her house.

Cute.

Finding a home with the shadows, he tucked his hands into his pockets, hiding his expensive rings and Rolex watch from view as he leaned against the brickwork and kept his dark gaze on her. Watching her closely. He watched as she unlocked her front door and shut it tight behind her. He watched as the movements of her cast shadows of her feminine form against the curtained windows of what was her living room, her kitchen. Lights one by one flickered off as she climbed the interior of the flat to her room. He waited. Watching.

He stayed until he saw her dark silhouette, one that matched his in the shadows, reach her bedroom, taking off her coat, her dress. He watched her undo her hair, one pin at a time. Eyes looking up and down her illuminated skin whenever she got too close to the window. Drinking her in like a fine whiskey. Until the curtains were drawn tight, and her electric light extinguished.

She was safe at home, only then, he proclaimed as he crept towards the docks of Cromer.

-

Wooyoung hadn’t come to the ballet that night, the day before their ‘outing’, their ‘date’, their whatever you’d call it. And at first, it sent a zing of fear. It reminded her of the weeks without contact. But, when she entered the boudoir, she saw the little letter resting on the vanity. Waiting for her patiently.

Wooyoung’s handwriting wasn’t as neat or as pretty as San’s. It was clunky, a mixture of uppercase and lowercase. Nothing like a typical upper-class man’s hand. But it was his. In his way, he reassured her that he’d be there on her doorstep, tomorrow afternoon at golden hour, 5:30 pm sharp, to pick her up for their adventure. Wait in anticipation to see him once more, he had written. She swore there was even a spritz of his cologne; the paper seemed to ache of him.

Cocky. Ever so Wooyoung.

San had come to watch her regardless, watching attentively from Box Number 8. She liked sneaking peeks at him during the performance. Like Wooyoung, his gaze rarely left her form, but his eyes were different. It was an admirable look. Wooyoung was entertained by her she knew that. But San… she wasn’t sure what was different, but it was.

That night after the show, he came to the boudoir and, rather than approach her with boldness in his step, he sat upon a settee – a pristine gift box sat beside him. And waited. It was a startling difference to Wooyoung’s eagerness. And at first, YN’d scurry to him, but he simply smiled up at her, almost cat-like with his eyes shutting in content.

“Take your time, honey.” He encouraged. “I’m not going anywhere.”

A small yet somehow powerful hand encouraged her to turn on herself, almost doing a small pirouette with him pulling her strings, and was urged to go back to the vanity across the boudoir with a gentle pat on her lower back. Uncertain eyes jittered towards him; pouty lips licked in confusion. A ‘but’ was about to tumble out of her lips when he let out a soft rumble. His hands urged her again like a mama bird nudging a birdling out of its nest.

“Go; it’s late and chilly,” he cooed out, soft and slow. “Get dressed into your skirts, get comfortable – then we can talk, honey.”

Honey. That was what he was like. Slow, tantalizing, sweet. Comforting like a drizzle of honey in your tea. There was a patience in him that Wooyoung didn’t have. He was okay with waiting.

YN was still unfamiliar with his behavior, so used to Wooyoung’s familiarity to balance her and guide her with San. Back at the shared vanity, the other ballerinas looked between her and her patron. A touch judging, a lot confused. Still, she obeyed him. Her dress was shrugged off to reveal her bared shoulders and cinched corseted waist for only a moment as she tugged on her dark skirts and matching blouse. Her makeup was thick and cakey from sweat and reapplication but, with no running water in the boudoir unlike the private dressing rooms, she was forced to keep it on or risk smearing it about unattractively. If she was alone, she’d attempt it, but her eyes flashed to see San once more through the mirrors. Waiting. Her head ached with the pricks of a million-and-one hair pins. Her fingers prodded at them, scratching satisfyingly, but she didn’t let her hair down. It’d take too long. He was waiting.

Waiting.

That wasn’t normal.

Her eyes kept glancing into the looking glass, in any of the mirrors that framed the entire boudoir in. Everywhere she looked he was there. Tapping his glass with his finger, licking his delicious looking lips. At every turn, as she returned her costume and as she slipped her pointe shoes off and replaced them with sensible heels, she was always looking to see if San was still there. And he was.

Lounging back, broad-shoulder and broad-chest, making the settee look smaller with his large muscular form. His eyes shut as he swirled his drink in a crystalline tumbler. He hadn’t left. Was he bored? Was he going to leave if she wasn’t quick enough? Why was he so odd compared to the other patrons who were all up on their protégés as soon as the performance was done?

In the mirror, she could see Julia in the arms of her Lord, still dressed in her costume. Mina’s was buried in the side of her neck, leaving whispers and hickeys, as she tried to wriggle out of her outfit. Some new patrons, young men with some money to burn, were talking to the youngers. All the men were occupied. Except for hers.

But San still sat, waiting patiently.

He was going to leave, he had to, he had to. The men would get frustrated. Why wasn’t San? She sped up, buttoning her blouse up and tying the ribbon in a bow on her front as she walked his way. A smile painted on her face.

“Two minutes, and 8 seconds,” San recounted, his head tilted back unmoving, as she came to stand in front of him once more.

Her chin shifted a mimicry of defiance as she swallowed. San sighed out through his nose as he shifted up. Feline eyes opened to meet hers with their burning warm. Like embers in a fireplace. Was he angry? Should she had stayed? Been faster?

“Honey.” He cooed the sweet nickname for her once more with warm affection. His hand reached out for hers, pausing until she shifted her hand to rest into his gloved one. A thumb rushed over the back of her hand soothingly. “When I say take your time, I mean it.” He raised her hand up and pressed a kiss to her knuckles.

“Did you enjoy the show?” she said in divergence. He steadied her with a gentle gaze. He squeezed her hand again.

“I mean it, YN,” he insisted seriously. “And yes, I did. You did beautifully.”

She nodded softly. His hand tugged her closer with a questioning brow, his other hand shifting to make sure her skirts didn’t tangle as she sat beside him.

“I’ll take it slower next time.” She promised as she crossed her legs.

“Good girl.” He praised.

His words sent a zing through her.

“How was your day?” she asked.

“Better now that I’m with you.” He flirted.

“You and Woo have the same flirts,” she teased.

His eyes crinkled. “Well, we both flirt with one another often.” He admitted.

Her cheeks flushed at his comment – did it mean what she thought? They were awfully close for best friends. “Where is Woo?” she asked.

“Sad to see just me?” he prompted.

She shook her head quickly. “I’m happy to see you. Just wondering where or what he could be off doing.”

He smirked, adjusting how he sat to wrap an arm around her waist. “You looking forward to your date?” he teased.

Date. He said date. It was a date! When was the last time she went on a date? Her stomach danced with butterflies. San’s smile grew, cat-like, as if he could feel the excitement bounce around in her bones.

“Yes,” she admitted.

“Good. He’s excited, too.” San reassured, thumb going up and down her waist. “Would you like to go on a date with me too, honey?”

Her ears burned at the thought of two men sharing her, but she nodded softly. Because she did want. She wanted San and Wooyoung. San was intriguing and kind and attractive. Different to Wooyoung but not better or worser. Her shame burned her ears just as red as her blushing bashfulness.

He grinned wider.

“What would we do?” It was strange to be asked these things as if her time wasn’t one he paid for, as if she wasn’t going on a date with his best friend tomorrow.

Still, she replied.

“I’d want to get to know you more,” she said truthfully.

He was interesting but she knew so little of him. He leaned forward, a different sort of magnetic energy pulled her closer.

“Ask me, honey.” He urged. His dark eyes met hers. He pulled her a smidge closer. “I’ll answer most anything.”

So, she did. 

She asked about his favorites, things that she had learned at first about Wooyoung. Safe things, easy things. He liked purple. He liked cats. He favored sweets over savory things. He liked the seaside. He said he’d take her to a pier when it warmed up. He favored dancing over singing. Eventually, she asked:

“What’s in the gift box?” She eyed the box beside his feet.

San grinned. “It’s from our Wooyo – and me.”

Our. Our. Our. He liked saying that, she noticed. His hands left her form to hoist it up, onto her lap. It was heavy.

“Is it for tomorrow?” she asked tentatively. One of the ballerinas said their patron liked getting things for them to wear.

“Open it and see,” he encouraged instead of answering.

So, she did. And inside was the most soft, warmest dark jacket she had ever seen. It was fluffy and furry on the inside. It looked like it was made of the darkest midnight black fabric she had ever seen, a soft metallic shine to it. There was no tag or name brand. Was this custom made to her?

It was large, but not oversized. It smelled of warm pineapple, something sweet like jasmine flowers, a musky woodsy oak, and a hint of sea-salt.

“Oh, San, it’s beautiful,” she cooed.

“And warm,” he said with a chuckle. “Let me help you.”

He stood, offering his hand like a gentleman to her, before sliding the dark coat over her shoulders. He fixed her hair delicately.

“Beautiful; fits you like a glove.” He hummed appreciatively, fixing the top button so it was snug. “Perfect for cold nights walking home.”

That night she walked home warmer than ever with a tropical scent engulfing her. But it was also the first night she had felt frightened in a long time.

There was fighting in the streets. Figures punching and spitting and yelling. No, the city had never been perfect. There were rougher parts and her side of town was certainly not protected from turf wars between adolescents and old families claiming land.

She was used to walking fast and not looking down alleys in case there were things she shouldn’t be seeing. But it felt different today. She was used to punks fighting between themselves. That was normal, but today they were all frightened it sounded. The group all cowering and whispering and biting out words, scared.

“Please, please, I promise – I’ll--!”  

YN was in the wrong place, wrong time, she knew it deep in her stomach as she peered around a corner only to see a tall figure pressing a gun against another’s jaw. Shadows cast over him, hiding their face from view, but when she heard the shadowed figure asking ‘where the fuck his money was’, she quickly looked away and scurried away. Unknowing, that there was a shadow figure of her own trailing after her, glancing down the alley way at the scene for a moment too long.

The equally tall figures’ gazes rose and locked for a moment. One with his ringed fingers holding a lit cigarette, the other with his ringed fingers gripping the gang member’s hair harshly. The man on his knees whimpered, pleading for help as the barrel of the gun pressed deeper into his temple. Her shadow man glanced nonchalantly at the crying man before looking back at his captor. A glitter of a smirk shined as the man with the cigarette raised his fingers to his head in a casual lazy salute. The captor snorted out a low rumble of a laugh before her shadow-figure left the alley.

“No, no, please help, please!” He didn’t listen; his sights were back on his doll. His long legs allowed him to catch up easily, always keeping her in his sights once more. He abandoned his cigarette once he came to a stop in his familiar alley-way. A polished boot crushed down on the cigarette butt as he fixed his rings casually, tracing over one in particular.

He watched as she entered her home and locked the door with a click. He watched until he saw her in her window once more, like he had most nights now. But there was one difference. She, in her sweet little nightdress with her hair pooling around her so temptingly, came into view of her window. He pushed back into the shadows, dark eyes drinking in her figure. How did San and Wooyoung control themselves around her? He wasn’t sure.

Looking out onto the dark, foggy streets of Cromer, she swallowed nervously. YN hoped she hadn’t been spotted as she entered her home. She closed the curtains with a swish as if they’d protect her. Stretching her limbs this way and that in nervousness, she tried to push those images of violence from her mind and keep her mind focused on something better.

Tomorrow. Her date.

-

It was Friday, a rare day off for the opera house. And the day of her and Wooyoung’s date. Date, date, date! It was all she could think of since her eyes flickered open. Last night’s fearful encounter nothing but a nightmare compared to the excitement buzzing through her.

“Do you think he’ll bring flowers?” she asked her mother as she dusted herself with powder.

“He should,” her curt-mouthed mother chimed. “It’s only proper.”

“Oh, I hope so!”

She had been dolling up for most of the day (after aiding her mother in some sewing assignments for the factory; they gave her way too much to handle YN thought…). First, she had a scalding hot bath where she splurged and used a long-saved gifted bottle of floral body oil. Her hair was washed and dried by the fireplace. Her closet was a proper mess as she chose between this dress and that. She debated going to get fresh flowers from market to help spruce up her old linens, but, after counting her coins, she realized she didn’t have enough to spare. Her pearls would have to make due.

Her new jacket from WooSan rested on the sofa beside her.  It still smelt of that strange cologne, not San’s nor Wooyoung’s. She wouldn’t need it today. Luckily, there was no snow outside. She’d know after all. She kept peering out her windows, waiting, waiting, waiting. When sunset began to peak over the buildings, she held her breath. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

She was oddly excited. She hadn’t expected the genuine excitement. Would he be romantic and bring a bushel of flowers? Or would he see this as nothing? Where would he take her? The park-side, a restaurant… what if he was joking, what if he didn’t show?

No, no. San knew she was excited. Wooyoung was excited, too.

When she heard the knock at the door, she jumped from her spot on the sofa, abandoning the book she was barely reading.

“Coming,” she called as she crossed the small living room to open the door, the locks clinking and clattering as she did so.

Wooyoung’s outfit was more casual than she had seen at the opera house, but he still reeked of expensive fabric and his heavenly cologne. Dark linens and his hair slicked back attractively; he smiled at her with a boyish expression. The same one she remembered him flashing the day they met. Somehow it did more to her heart now than then. Perhaps, because this one felt genuine. This one felt like a boy she had met and was trying to win her heart, jittering with nerves. His hand went to fix his perfect hair and she smiled a megawatt smile.

And while this wasn’t the first time he’d seen her bare-faced, hair-down, in her drop-waisted day-dress, he stared at her like it was. The pale sky-blue dress complimented her faintly rouged knees and white silk stockings. Her hair rested in carefully done wave-curls – her mother had sat with a red-hot curling iron helping form the curls one by one into pretty sections.

“Hi,” she greeted.

“Hello, my beautiful swanette,” he breathed, enamored. He reached for her hand to press a gentle kiss to her gloved knuckles. Gentlemanly. Her heart swirled like it was a record in a player, swooning for him ever more. It felt like a romance novel; it felt like a dream.

“Hi,” she said again, sweetly.

He smiled against her knuckles, eyes flashing to meet hers with a Wooyoung-coyness.

“This is him?” she heard her mother crow from behind her.

YN’s shoulders jumped a bit. She hadn’t thought her mother would want to meet him. Despite her help with preparing, her mother was oddish. A mixed case of approving and disapproving. She liked that her daughter danced but didn’t like that she didn’t work. She liked that she was going on a date but didn’t like it was with a man from the boudoir. She didn’t quite approve of the boudoir’s politics, but she knew he was paying for her fees now. It made her worry.

Wooyoung’s grin only grew as he peered over YN’s shoulder.

“Hello ma’am,” he greeted politely, bowing his head. He kept a hold of YN’s hand, guiding her a step hi way to face her mother with him.

Her mother, firm-faced, glared at him before diverting her eyes to the bashful looking YN.

“You take care of my YN?” she queried, crossing her arms.

“I do,” he said easily. “I think she’s wonderful. Talented, too.”

She made a hmph noise in the back of her throat, glancing between the pair again.

“Be safe,” she pressed with a hand pushing YN forward. “Be smart.”

“I’ll take good care of her,” Wooyoung promised as he squeezed YN’s hand in his and pulled her towards him fully. His hand swept her arm into his properly as he offered a smile to her mother once more as the door closed.

There were no flowers she noted, not even a single rose, and she couldn’t help the buzz of disappointment from fizzing over her. Still, the smell of him and the excitement she had brewing with her kept her optimistic.

“Let’s go, my swanette,” he beamed, patting her arm linked with his as he led the way.

“What are we doing, Woo?” she asked, and her excitement made him beam.

 “It’s a surprise,” he teased before stealing a kiss on her cheek.

He took her to a cinema, a nickelodeon where they looked at the moving pictures from viewing boxes. It was mostly excuses to huddle close together and giggle at the provocative films. One even featured a couple kissing on a train scandalously – he quickly tried to mimic it, pressing a kiss to her cheek. Scandalous for the public eye but sweet for her heart. He loved to hear her giggles ring out. 

As they sat in the darkened theatre of the cinema, the black-and-white film jittering as the projector rattled along. A live band played a lively tune, a made-up soundtrack to the film. Still, he held her hand and kept whispering in her ear. Sweet things, compliments, comments about the film. He was talkative even in the fairly-full theatre. He didn’t mind the curious glances or the whispers. In fact, it was like YN was the only thing in the world for Wooyoung. Everything else was secondary. The film barely held his attention; only she did.

“Woo, are you even watching?” she whispered to him, giggling undertoning her words.

He grinned at her, leering down at her as he fussed with her pretty hair. “I’m watching you.”

She smiled glancing aside, her gaze leaving the film about a train. So many things in film were about trains apparently.

“Pretty,” he chimed, tucking a curl around her ear.  His hand cupped her jaw and redirected her gaze. “Thank you for coming with me.”

Wooyoung was intense in everything he did. But it was a pleasant intensity. Like gravity. The magnetic pull between him and her felt natural. Like she was his Earth and he was her moon.

He leaned close til their noses brushed, til they shared the same hot breath.

“It’s fun,” she whispered to him. “Being with you.”

He smiled and leaned ever closer. 

“I like being with you. I like you, YN.”

Their mouths locked for the first time beneath the loud clink-clanking of a projector of the cinema, highlighted by its glow.

It wasn’t anything hot and heavy, but she could taste him on her mouth for the first time, breathe him in so close. His hand cupped her cheek, pulling her ever close like he could devour her. He wished he could. He wished he could lick into her mouth, pull her over his lap, muss her hair and make her lips flush as red as the lipstick she wore at the ballet.

But Wooyoung knew it wasn’t the time yet.

Still, each press of his lips to hers felt addicting to her and made her body hotter than the projector’s lamplight.

-

“Extra, extra!” A newsie cried as she passed him on the streets; his voice piercing her ear with its loudness. “Man shot dead after sports match – conflict uncertain! Suspect jailed.”

“Who’s the suspect?” a woman with a much too large hat babbled at the boy.

“Buy one and see, Miss!” he encouraged.

Such a good salesman, YN snickered as she passed by. She wondered if maybe one of the girls at the ballet would buy an edition. A man killed at a sports match… must’ve been a rich man if it was being reported about. She wondered what happened. A bet gone wrong perhaps?

A breeze made her shiver and pick up her pace towards the opera house.

-

There was a large bushel of flowers on her vanity the next performance. Wooyoung’s handwriting graced the letter.

‘Thanks for the date, beautiful swanette. See you later.’

She nearly melted. How did he know she had wanted flowers? It was fate, romance, everything. He was such a gentleman.

He and her were different. San, her, and him.

Yes, she felt it.

-

Wooyoung and San were interesting when they were in the boudoir together. They had their own magnetic energy that couldn’t be denied. They were close. Closer than normal men. But when it came to her, it felt like their interest on her was equal. A shared obsession – their eyes would lock onto her and never falter once in the boudoir (unless it was to give one another knowing looks.)

She was looking forward to their visits. Some of the girls asked if the date led to more, but it hadn’t. Wooyoung was the perfect gentleman. San was the perfect patron, paying her fees for the pair of them. For the first time, she had money to spare in her pockets. More days trickled by and each visit brought her closer and closer to them. Nights of whispers about the city, the gossip Wooyoung loved to hear about, about her, and shared embraces that left her buzzing.

She’d dreamt about them a few times. San’s touches became more teasing, daring as he kept his bespectacled gaze locked on her as his hand grazed over her waist. Right after Wooyoung pressed a kiss to her. Burning eyes, burning hands. Her dreams were wild that night.

-

Box #8 was full once more. It had Wooyoung and San in clear view, but it was harder to spot the others. When she could, it was only blurred visage. A strong nose peaking from beneath opera glasses. Sparkling rings on someone’s hands. A gleam of a smile.

At intermission, it was just Wooyoung and San; walking side-by-side as San whispered something, a grin forming on Wooyoung’s face. Wooyoung was mid-reply when he approached her.

“I said it should be something less known, so it’d be—” 

“Hello, you two,” she greeted, her skirt a full thing of feathers for the next act.

“Swanette,” Wooyoung lit up, easily swooping her into an embrace per usual. Except now, he pressed a kiss to her lips, sweetly.

“Wooyoung!” Her surprised cry of his name came out muffled against his lips.

He giggled before turning so they faced San. “Sannie, I think we should go out all together.” He argued.

“Soon,” he agreed before he greeted her. “Hello, honey.”

“Who’s with you tonight?” she couldn’t help but ask.

Wooyoung chuckled lowly, swaying her this way and that.

“I told you she’d ask,” he hummed. “She’s a jealous vixen.”

He buried himself in her neck and she let out a giggle knowing he was simply teasing her. Teeth grazed over her neck, and she jolted in his arms, shrieking quietly. Her hands raised to her mouth.

“She’s not; she’s inquisitive.” San corrected, watching the display with a pleased expression.

“Curious about a lot of things,” Wooyoung whispered tauntingly. As if he knew her brain. Her cheeks flushed red.

A low rumble of twin laughter mingled in the air as San stepped towards the pair in embrace.

“They’re our friends,” San countered. “Yeosangie wanted to visit you, but he has a match tomorrow. He insists on practicing the night before. He could only stay so long for the performance.”

“And the others?” she asked, curiosity lingering on her face.

San’s gaze flickered to Wooyoung’s for a long moment. Wooyoung nodded. “Seonghwa is in attendance. He won’t be able to visit. He sends his warmest regards.”

“Which one was he?” she queried, brow pursing.

“On my left,” Wooyoung commented. “Yeosang and San are like two peas in a pod around one another. Can’t unglue them from each other”

He hushed Wooyoung’s comment by coming close and squeezing his best friend’s neck and crowding her in pleasantly. There was a faint smell of coffee and vanilla… and popped champagne.

“He’s jealous,” San teased. “He likes attention almost as much as you do, hm?”

Her cheeks flushed and San smirked. Sighing out, he wrapped a hand tentatively around her waist, squeezing reassuringly.

 “They’ll visit soon, I’m sure. They’re busy is all.”

Wooyoung pressed a kiss to her temple and she swore she saw San inch forward to do the same before he stopped himself.

-

“Imara?” she asked during practice between plie-ing on the barre and stretching their legs.

“Yes?” the other girl replied, offering a smile.

Ever since she’d gained patrons, she had noticed a change. A nicer tone towards her. Not quite respect but something more. It was strange. Still, YN smiled and continued her question.

“Do you know of a Seonghwa in society?” she asked.

Despite all their shared experience with the upper-class, some were more aware than others. Most ballerinas acted on the edge of the rich, floating like asteroids in their orbit. Some were comets, pretty to watch for a moment but a fleeting fancy. The only ones with more insight, a more hands-on experience with the rich were those with a patron. Proteges particularly were informed about high-society, usually due to the drunken rambles of their patrons.

Imara paused, leaning further into her stretch. “Last name?” she prompted.

“Kim? Or-or Jung?”

YN had yet to find out why Wooyoung had given her a false name… or how the newspaper had a false name.There was a low hum as the woman shifted this way and that.

“No to both… but-“, she clicked her tongue. “I’ve heard of a Park Seonghwa from Dohyunnie—I mean Mr. Kim.”

“Oh, what have you heard?” YN queried; intrigue piqued.

“Nothing that amazing,” Imara snorted. “Just that he was doing business with him. Dohyun sounded frustrated though. But he’s frustrated most days now.” Her face fell into something of concern, of care. One might even say love.

Park Seonghwa? Hm…

-

“Hey, honey.”

San was waiting for her outside of the Opera House back against the wrought-iron street lamp. Snow dotted his perfectly coifed locks like it was salt-and-pepper hair - a sneak peek of what was to come down the line for him. It made her think of things too domestic and too fantastical for a dancer. Waking up to him, children running between their legs. Home. Love. Family. Things that were too taboo to think about considering their relationship.

Her dancer friends were always quick to remind her that he was paying for her.

But now, on a non-show day, she was surprised to see him waiting outside for her. Rehearsals weren’t too long or intensive, especially once they were performing a show for as long as they had been, but still YN wondered how long he had been waiting.

“San!” she exclaimed, padding up to him with a grin. “How long have you been out here?”

Her hand went to wipe at the accumulation of snow on his coat. He smiled at her fondly.

“Not long,” he reassured.

“You’re covered in snow,” her voice relented, pouting at him. “If I’m to be honest, shouldn’t you be?”

She teased him easily and he grinned, almost a side-smirk as he fixed her, their, coat to make sure it was buttoned up all the way.

“I guess so. That’s how these things work, hm?” he teased back.

“What things?” YN couldn’t help but clarify.

“Relationships.” He replied back. “Right?”

It made her heart flutter like a hummingbird’s wings. Relationship. That meant… not just a business relationship, right? But what of Wooyoung? Did he know? Was this alright? Her stomach bubbled with nervousness, worries but also a wave of excitement.

San had always been straightforward, so the fact he danced around the topic made her nerves only grow. But… she wanted it. She wanted him. Guilt and intrigue and want clashed in a whirl. Like snow tumbling in the air.

“Right,” she replied, her voice soft. There was a gentle tremor of excitement, nervousness, anticipation.

His fingers that had just made up her coat’s buttons shifted to tuck hair behind her ear. She didn’t flinch at his icy touch. “And in relationships, they can… kiss,” he stated, warm fingers trailing up her neck to cup her jaw.

It was then she realized his face was blushed not from the cold, but bashfulness. Shyness. Him – shy! It baffled her, but the more she was around him, the more she learned how soft he was. Like Wooyoung had warned. He was soft and caring and gentle. Loving.

San leaned in closer, head ducking and shadowing her from the flame-lit lamp light. His breath was visible in the chill, fanning over her face in a whirl of warm mint and medicinal rosemary.

“They do,” she replied equally gentle at his touch.

He cupped her cheeks, his hand surprisingly small and yet she felt so sturdily safe in them.

“May I?” he asked, eyes meeting hers.

She nodded, a quiet noise of agreement breathed out as he got closer and closer.

Their kiss was something slow, not like Wooyoung’s and hers. Hot and eager beneath the equally warm projector a cinema. San’s kiss was slow like he had all the time in the world. It was cold out in the snow, but the icy chill felt nice mixed with his hot breath fanning over their locked lips.

They kissed for far too long beneath that lamplight, a figure across the streets watching on as he always did.

-

She barely slept a wink that night. Her worries about her and Wooyoung and her and San… and honestly San and Wooyoung! Was she wrong for kissing San? He had seen Wooyoung press kisses to her cheeks. They both had manhandled her and stroked her and tickled her. They had been closer in some ways than a simple kiss already. Her body was comfortable with them; she liked their attention, their warmth, their presences.

Oh gosh, what if this ruined everything?

But, they – San and Wooyoung - had to talk? San didn’t seem like someone who would go behind his best friend’s back. And Wooyoung had never objected to San’s careful gaze and wandering hands. Wooyoung could never keep his mouth shut either! She tossed and turned in her bed, obsessing and worrying, until she simply stood and switched on her lamp.

Her shadow, watching from the alley way with a lit cigarette in between his teeth, twitched. What was she doing awake? She’d be exhausted. He frowned. The shadow of her form paced this way and that in the dark of night. Worrisome.

And he worried for her. He worried for his doll, biting at his plump lips, chewing on them before bringing his cigar back to his lips.

-

In front of the grand Cromer Opera House, a newsie cried out. “Disappearance by the docks! Four workers never check out of their shift! Details are shocking!”

“How shocking, kid?” one of the ballerinas countered as they approached the building, arms crossed.

“Extremely so, Miss.” He exclaimed.

“You said that last time and there was barely anything added to the story!” cried out the ballerina beside YN, her arm interlaced with hers. “Just a stupid name that we didn’t even know – some Yunho fellow!”

“I don’t make the stories; I just sell them,” he argued, hands raising.

“Sell them that’s for sure,” she huffed. “Not today, Jack. You aren’t getting any of my coins.”

It almost made YN laugh if only the content the boy had cried out about wasn’t so alarming. Disappearances? There had just been a man shot a few weeks ago and now disappearances. Mother had mentioned disgruntled workers at the factory as of late too. With pay being as it is, some of the younger girls got into worser things, her mother said.  And the gangs had been acting up. Memories of the man’s deep voice in the alley way threatening the young boy made her shiver.

Even if her mom didn’t quite support her as a ballerina, always saying it was an easy way up to fame despite the many nights of pain and many, many years of empty pockets, she had to admit now that she was relieved YN wasn’t working beside her in the textile factory. It seemed like things were up to no good in this town.

YN sighed out tiredly as she walked up the steps of the opera house only to blink in surprise. On the framed poster outside the opera house, there was a new notice. Swan Lake’s performances were coming to a close – so the ballet could prepare a new show for its patrons of the arts. What could it be? No one, not even the girls knew yet.

-

The show had been canceled for the day and for tomorrow! A shock for the ballerinas already prepared for the early afternoon matinee performance. It was then they were dismissed, claiming there was a gas leak.  Some said they were being kicked out for a new owner to tour. Other girls said it was for deciding the leads for the next show.

Nonetheless, YN felt herself sag in relief. Maybe she’d get some shut eye.

-

A surprise day off was rare. In fact, she couldn’t remember an unplanned day off since she was 10. But it didn’t mean lazing around all day. No, she was prepared to help her mother with extra orders.

Bright and early, she was awake, more rested but certainly still worrying about her patrons. Her lips had been bitten raw in anxiety, but her mind was set to try to not think of them today. Not getting to talk to them yesterday felt strange and it didn’t help her worries still ate at her like a leech.

Her hair was tied back in a pretty braid, her outfit simple, as she exited the front door with a large basket of orders from her mother, ready for delivery.

“I’ll be back, ‘ma!” she called. “I’ll try to be back before you leave for your shift.”

There was a call back in agreement, hard to hear over her mother’s sewing machine whirling with her steady foot-pedaling. Turning, she was met with a surprise.

“Swanette,” Wooyoung crowed out from the nearby sidewalk, his hands wrapped around the gate as he grinned up at her.

“Woo!”

“Are you free today?”

It was still strange to see Wooyoung outside the ballet. Her bare face burned and felt sticky, wrong. She was used to the stage-makeup hiding her flush of nerves. Her hands fiddled with her outing gloves, half shifting her basket to her arm. “Today, I was supposed to-“

“She is, Mr. Wooyoung,” her Mother crowed out from the window – pushing it open.

“Mother,” YN insisted, looking her way.

“I can handle the orders for today; go – before you’re old and grey,” the woman tutted.

Wooyoung laughed out, hyena-like, as his hands banged against the gate in excitement. “Mother’s orders, sweet swanette.” He added.

Her sharp look only made his bright grin grow.

“Go,” her mother pushed once more. “Leave the delivery by the door.”

Huffing, YN hopped up the steps of the apartment. She placed her orders down and grabbed her hand bag. She slid her nicer heels beside the door on, leaving her old shoes there in its wake, and tip-tapped down the apartment’s steps.

“Thank you, Miss,” Wooyoung chimed out to her mother. “I’ll take good care of her.”

“You better,” her mother replied before snapping the window shut.

“She’s lovely,” Wooyoung said to YN with a grin that she could only describe as a cat who got the cream.

“You like her, because she played into your plot,” she teased.

“And she raised a gem like you,” he flirted back.

A gem… was she? She felt her multiple days of anxiety cling to her back like a sleep-demon on someone’s chest. Heavy and painful.

With grandiose, he offered his arm her way. She took it with ease. It surprised her how even in her worrisome she felt comfortable so close to him. A part of her wondered if the neighbors were watching as she walked along their rickety pathways with a man who could buy their land twice over.

“What are we doing today?” she asked quietly.

A date was something she could predict. A visit to the cinema, or a diner, or even the sea-side pier amusement park. But a day outing…

“I must attend something dreadful,” Wooyoung sighed out dramatically, his arm squeezing tighter around hers. In this open public, he was the picture-perfect man, no wandering hands up and down her waist. No cuddling embraces. No kisses that left her breathless. It was strange that she missed them.

“What?” she feared.

“A tennis match featuring my dear Yeosang.” He sighed out. “Tennis is so boring, you know?”

She did not know, unfortunately.

Glancing over his dresswear, she noted his fine linens; was she not dressed enough for this? Her outfit was a sensible attire, not at all as seductive as her costumes at the ballet and not a smidge high-end. It wasn’t even like her day-dress she wore the last date with the ultramodern drop-waist and frills. She was in a simple deep purple skirt, down to her ankles, sensible heels, and her dark blouse was high necked with his pearls looped around it as an accent. The only whisper of wealth. Would they think she was some whore? Wasn’t she? She was jumping between patrons, jumping between San and him.

“Little swan,” he nudged her with his hip. He had been yapping along and she hadn’t caught a word.

“Sorry,” she apologized quickly, shaking her head as she tried to push down the feeling of being used. Wooyoung didn’t think that. Didn’t look at her like that.

“Sannie will be there, too. But he may be preoccupied.” he continued. “Tennis just doesn’t have the thrill of other sports - don’t tell Yeosang that.”

That made her chuckle.

“What sports do you like, Woo?” she asked, trying not to think of San and his warmth and his medicinal cologne mixed with cigarette smoke and his slow kisses.

“Boxing.” It was an immediate answer. “And horse-racing. I’m starting to like baseball, too. Aurora had no stadiums, but Cromer’s is nice.”

All brutal in her mind. She knew of a few girls who dated boxers; their lovers’ faces were bruised and beaten most days. At least with tennis, there was no gore.

“I’ve never been to a tennis match,” she admitted. “Or many sports games.”

He wouldn’t judge her; he hadn’t yet. Instead, his eyes lit up.

“Lucky girl,” he hummed. “You’ve got me as a perfect guide then.”

“What should I expect?” she asked.

“Long boring minutes,” he lamented. “But it’s less sports-focused for us. Think of it like a show.”

“In what way?” she retorted.

“The audience, us, are all there for different reasons, right? Some are there to watch the performance; some are there to watch the audience, hm.” He added.

“Do rich people do anything except people watch?” she mumbled.

Wooyoung crowed out a laugh. Her face burned. She shouldn’t have said that in front of him. “Some,” he countered. “But we are here to people watch today. That’s the fun of sports like this.”

-

She was sandwiched between Wooyoung and San – who had met them at the gates of the tennis court. One of Wooyoung’s hands pressed on her knee as he turned in to face her, occasionally whispering things in her ear. San’s arm was warm around her shoulders.

What she couldn’t ignore were the looks. On stage, she yearned for the attention, the limelight. But now with the elite’s gazes all zoomed in on her and her patrons… her face felt hot. A hand fiddled with her pearls. She looked away from their repeating blank stares.

“Shh,” San cooed after a few moments.

Her eyes flashed to him. He looked cool and casual in his dark fitted vest and pinstriped pants. A white silk shirt was open beneath it and rolled up to his elbows, showing off his tan skin. San’s glasses were absent from his nose for the first time. It made his attitude seemed stronger; the flat planes of his face sharp. But his eyes were still a soft brown, soothing her as his hand rose to rub at her shoulder blade.

“You’re okay.”

Her stomach whirled. Was she so transparent? Her tongue peeked out to lick her lips.

“I’m okay,” she tried to reassure him.

Her fingers played with a pearl, tip tap tapping it. San smiled at her, encouragingly patient. His other hand placed his drink down; the crystalline glass clanking onto the table as he did so. He reached for her hand, fingers caressing down her phalanges and stopping her fussing.

“Honey,” he hummed. “Don’t lie to me.”

Her face felt warm.

“I’m not,” she whispered, eyes flickering to watch as he stroked up and down her fingers soothingly.

She could feel Wooyoung’s gaze on them; he lifted his drink to his curled mouth. His fingers tightened on her knee, almost warningly.

“I’m not,” she repeated looking over at Wooyoung.

He cocked a brow as he swallowed down his liquor; his gaze directed her back to San silently. San’s gaze had hardened enough that she pouted. His grasp was still ever gentle as he tugged her hand away from her necklace and interlaced their fingers with a questioning tickle of his fingers against hers. She let him.

“I can read you like the back of my hand,” he told her, squeezing their entwined hands. “Ignore them. They don’t matter.”

She glanced up at him, questioningly. How easy they could say something like that? Approval meant everything.

He sighed out a bit, leaning closer. “They don’t. I promise.”

All that matters is them; a subtle reminder. She nodded mutely; his eyes crinkled at her before he raised the back of her hand up to press a fond kiss to it. Her eyes flashed to Wooyoung to see his expression but he barely blinked at the action, his thumb going over and over her knee.

San had begun to ask a question: “What’s wrong—”

Thwack! The sound of a black-leathered tennis ball hitting the clay-court’s floor dragged her eyes away from her patrons and back to the action for a split second.

Yeosang swung and made another point with ease. Wooyoung cheered from her side, excitement lighting up his face as the Chair Umpire announced Yeosang’s point. Her gaze was drawn back to his visible excitement. Despite Wooyoung’s dramatics, he seemed eager when there was winning on the line.

Her gaze shifted from her patron back to Kim Yeosang. The athlete was lean; his muscles only showing when he made a swing. Bulging from his white tee, his triceps and biceps were built. His hair was long, half tied up in a small ponytail. Even so, there were strands of dark-brown hair that flickered in front of his face. Every now and then, he’d blow the tresses away with a huff.

“The other opponent hasn’t even made a point,” YN commented. 

“Yeosangie hasn’t lost a match in a long time,” Wooyoung revealed. “He’s the Champion of Ateez.”

San snorted out as if Wooyoung had said something funny. His hand adjusted hers in his as he took another long sip of his drink.

Yeosang had turned to grab a cup of water presented to him; theyd reach a pause in the game apparently. He took a deep sip of the drink. His biceps flexed, drawing her eyes over the muscle down to his elbow up his forearm to his pretty mouth. His Adam’s apple jumped every so often beneath his damp tawny skin as he swallowed over and over. Stray droplets dripped from his pouty lips, carving rivulets down his chin, down his neck, over his chest. She had to stop herself from looking him up and down even more.

YN wondered if this was how San and Wooyoung felt at the ballet. Watching another so intently, she took in everything of Yeosang. The tousled look of his sweeping hair, sweat that dripped down the side of his face, the way the sun glinted off his bared collarbones, the way his eyes looked as he opened them from drinking.

His eyes weren’t like San or Wooyoung’s – even from this distance, she knew that. He had a strange forcefulness in them, an intensity she usually only saw when someone furrowed their brow at you. A darkness, a cruelty, a seriousness. He glanced back at his opponent. His face was unsmiling. Cold, cruel, calculated.

“How long has he played?” she asked her duo. Her eyes hadn’t left him as he returned to his spot on the court.

“A while,” San answered. “He had been training since childhood and quickly rose in competitions.”

She hummed. There was a trickle of envy in her veins; she wanted that. She bet he hadn’t had to play up to men and women; he didn’t have to feel like an object. Even if the men with her insisted she wasn’t.

“Go Yeosangie!” Wooyoung cheered, almost disruptively. All eyes flashed to them. Yeosang included. But instead of annoyance like YN had expected, he smiled.

Wow, his smile. Her breath was stolen at the sunshine bright grin that he offered. He looked sweet then and there before turning to face his opponent once more. The grin fell and he was once more a cold calculating persona. A star turned icy.

The game began again with the opponent whacking the tennis ball towards Yeosang’s side. Yeosang was quick, agile, as he slid to hit the ball back.

Back and forth, back and forth.

After some time, she realized how Wooyoung could find this boring. He had grown antsy, already. He’d shifted in his seat, glancing around the stadium with intrigue. His mouth began to chatter once more, especially when all that was left in his glass was ice.

“Do you know anyone about, swanette?” he asked.

His hand had shifted from her knee to rest around her waist, casually. Occasionally, he fiddled with her skirt’s belt loop teasingly, but was mostly stagnant. He tapped her waist at his query; his many rings clinked delicately against one another with the motion.

Licking her lips, she felt San squeeze her fingers softly, almost reassuringly she realized. Gazing across the tournament’s audience, she recognized some familiar faces.

Henry Young, the police chief of Cromer, sat across the court in the shade, discussing something with a tall suited man. The bespectacled man looked red-faced, puffy cheeked as he argued with the other.

Her gaze shifted from him over the sea of folk. Her eyes widened at the sight of Julia, red hair piled upon her head and dressed in some gaudy purple dress. Lord Frederickson was returning to her side with a sly smirk. What the fuck? She said she never went out with her patron. Her brows crinkled, her lips frowning as she glanced away.

Why did she lie?

There was Kim Dohyun who often was all over Imara at the boudoir. He now stood beside his wife, a bedazzled silken lady with two small children tugging on her arm as she drank her champagne.

“Yes,” YN admitted. Her chin gave a soft nod towards the bank conglomerate of Cromer. The man had smiled brightly at a friend before leaning in to whisper something to his wife. Who smiled at him with glee and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek.

Did she know that he was pressing kisses to Imara’s cheeks just a few nights ago? Did she know that he spent nearly a fortune for Imara’s dues? That she almost had enough to have her own dressing room? Her own solo?

“He’s cheating on his wife,” she said coldly under her breath. “Yet she doesn’t even know.”

Dohyun chuckled at something another one of his cohorts said as he adjusted his wife’s hand on his arm. YN glared.

“They all do it,” she muttered, glancing aside. For once, she wished she had taken up Wooyoung’s offer for alcohol.

San sighed out lowly. “I don’t understand men who do such things,” he admitted, taking a sip of his drink. His thumb rubbed soothing circles. “Unless she is aware.”

“I doubt it.” she admitted. “Imara would be in on it; she knows everything about high society.”

“I’d never do that to the ones I love,” Wooyoung said solemnly. Seriously.

His grasp tightened on her waist as he shifted to sit closer. San hummed in agreement. They watched as the man captured his wife’s mouth in a kiss, curt and aggressive. They’d seen him do the same thing to the pretty featured dancer at the boudoir.

There was a flicker of a question in the back of her head. How were they okay with sharing her then? Was it not the same thing? When Wooyoung kisses her under the glow of a cinema’s projector, was it not cheating when San pressed a warm smooch to her lips beneath the lamp post outside the opera house?

She licked her lip and tentatively tried to phrase her dangerous query. “San kisses my hand,” she stated. A simply edge into her question – a question that held more gravity than a simple kiss to her hand.

There’s a pause.

Wooyoung laughed out, his eyes crinkling as his attention shifted from the crowd to her. His affection burned in his chest. He wished he could press kisses over her cheeks. He was tempted to do so despite being in the public. San hummed in his chest, almost purr-like as he shifted his position to sandwich her tighter between them.

“I know that,” Wooyoung laughed. His eyes flickered to San and back to her. “I know everything, pretty girl. I thought we made it obvious. We know and share everything.”

Her cheeks burned a bit at the thought of them talking of her but San simply grinned.

“You are so sweet, honey.” He cooed close to her ear. “Wooyoung knows of our shared kisses. I know of your little rendez-vous at the cinema as well. Everything is alright.“

Her burning cheeks were only tripled as they both chuckled and daringly pressed twin kisses to her natural-rouged cheeks.

“Cute.” Wooyoung fussed.

She giggled out as they continued to tease and flirt under their breaths; half paying attention to the match and half paying attention to the folk watching their fancies. Soon, there was a chiming bell, ringing out to signify the end of the match. Their attention was stolen once more, letting YN breath out a shaky breath. San chuckled mischievously. The Umpire rose from his seat, declaring Kim Yeosang the winner.

“Finally,” Wooyoung sighed out, his arm leaving her waist for a moment as he stretched in his seat before rising to his feet.

“Let’s go visit our beloved Yeosang,” San encouraged, patting her hip before rising as well.

The two men walked ahead of her, pushing between the crowds easily. In fact, she realized that the crowds practically parted for them and half-swallowed her. It isn’t until her fingers slip from Wooyoung’s that they paused.

“Baby!” Woo chimed out, looking her way to catch her getting squished between men and women who wouldn’t even glance her way. Rough jabs and pushes made her huff out.

Wooyoung pushed back at a figure who had just shoved past her, losing the edge of respectability and gentleman flair. When the fine-suited man turned in outrage, his face paled at the sight of Wooyoung’s furrowed brow – the picture of an angered god in a Renaissance painting but the man who was shoved looked at him with wide eyes.

“Oh, I’m sorry, sorry,” he pleaded, bowing his head.

“You better be,” Wooyoung’s voice was unlike anything she had hear. Scolding, firm, and unwavering. Gone was his boyish charm and instead was a soft of cruelty she saw Yeosang carry on the court. But when he shimmied over to her, an arm went to her bicep ever so gently. Wooyoung’s dark eyes grazed her up and down with care. He couldn’t care less about the groveling man except to send him another dirty look. His darkness faded as he looked back at her each time.

“You okay?” he asked softly.

“Just lost you,” she said simply, a smidge shell shocked.

“Never,” he whispered back soft as cotton candy, taking her hand in his again. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” she reassured with a furrow of her brow.

He smiled at her, warmly, squeezing her hand. “I’m your guide, aren’t I?” he teased. “I’ll keep you closer this time.”

He tugged her close to him, almost inappropriately so for high society, but he only let out a crow of a laugh at her surprised face. Just as suddenly, he had her arm in his, polite and proper as always.

“C’mon, let’s catch up to Sannie,” he encouraged, squeezing her arm.

Now, he kept her by his side, close and tight. The ocean of people parted for both of them to reveal Yeosang, patting his forehead dry with a pristine white rag and San smiling and cooing over the athlete.

“You did a good job today!” San beamed, cheering the other on.

Yeosang nodded, almost timidly, but offered the larger man a close-lipped smile.

“It was a good day.” Yeosang agreed. “You win anything?” he asked, offhandedly.

Yeosang’s voice matched his face; not dainty but tender. It held a deep tone that seemed warm and pleasant despite its quietness. He spoke not with a booming haughtiness but a humble hum. His very voice encouraged people to shut up and pay attention – just in a different way.

San rubbed his neck, adjusting his suit a bit. “I wasn’t in charge of betting today,” he admitted.

Yeosang’s eyes widened, his brows jumping with the motion. “Oh. Who else is here?”

He leaned in close to whisper something that she couldn’t catch as they approached the duo. Wooyoung’s arm was strong around her.

“Congratulations,” Wooyoung praised.

“I lost you both,” San crowed out as he pulled away from Yeosang – the athlete flinching at the noise. At that sight, San cooed out an apology, a thumb pinching the other’s ear affectionately.

Yeosang tried to dodge away from the other but couldn’t and he succumbed to his babying. She hadn’t seen San baby someone so much – even with Wooyoung, it was a different sort of coddling. Like a firm hand keeping him on track.

“How dare you leave us?” Wooyoung dramatically whined.

San played into his dramatics, apologizing for abandoning them. It made her giggle a bit at their shenanigans, their comfortability. It made her nerves lighten at meeting a new person. Yeosang’s gaze had laid solidly on her the entire time, calculated, and intrigued.

“Yeosangie,” San started, his hand going to pat the other’s back. The well-awarded athlete’s brows raised as if at attention, flickering his gaze between him and her. “This is Miss YN LN.”

“Hello,” he greeted, properly. His hand outstretched and she shook it politely. His hands felt rough against hers but not unpleasant as he squeezed her hand as he pulled away. Yeosang smiled.

Yeosang looked at her like he did his opponent – despite his smile shining brighter than any paparazzi’s camera flash. He looked at her like she was a challenge. Butterfly wings fluttered against her rib cage and she wasn’t sure if it was excitement or red flags warning her to stay away. With her rose-tinted glasses, she ignored it and continued talking to him. Wooyoung’s comforting form was still with her even if San had disappeared at the beckoning of a bulky gentleman she had never seen before in a pin-striped suit bearing a firm facial expression.

Their discussion was led by Wooyoung; babbling on about the game, about the winnings that had been announced via the loudspeakers, about how Yeosang deserved much more. He went on bragging about the athlete, much to his blushed cheeks. His cheeks so red made her only find him more charming. The sun shifted in the sky as they all talked.

“I’ll be right back, Swanette,” Wooyoung promised, arm vacating her waist and leaving her feel exposed. “Yeosang here will keep you company while I try to find our Sannie. He’s been gone for far too long.”

Both Yeosang and YN had little to no time to say anything before Wooyoung had disappeared into the throngs of the upper-class.

YN chuckled faintly, her hand raising to tuck hair aside. “He did this during San and I’s first meeting, too. Left us alone.” she admitted bashfully, a sense of déjà vu crashing over her at the thought.

Yeosang’s laugh felt false, a distict “het-he” of a giggle. “He’s like that. But he’s right,” the tennis star reassured. “You are safe with me, YN.”

She smiled at him. “Thank you,” she praised. Licking her lips, she tried to push down the anxiety of talking to someone new. Despite the boudoir teaching one to say ‘yes and-‘ to any requests, she wasn’t quite sure what was appropriate outside in upper society.

“You were the first tennis match I’ve seen,” she admitted, searching for something to discuss.

“Oh?” his eyes lit up. “And what did you think?”

“You are very good,” she chuckled. “The other man had no chances of winning.”

Her praise seemed to make him stand taller, proud of his accomplishments. “Thank you.” He waited a beat. “I feel like we are similar that way. Skilled, dedicated, caring. I’ve never seen someone perform like you do. Forgive me for never greeting you before or after a show; things have… been untimely.”

“You mean your games,” she added nodding. “Wooyoung told me you’ve had to leave in order to prepare – I understand. Especially after today’s performance --- match… game?” she corrected herself from using ‘show’ terminology.

Gosh, she felt like a fish out of water. Especially without her Wooyoung and San. Hers… she had never thought of them like that… but it felt like second nature.

Her Wooyoung and San.

He laughed again and this time she realized his giggle was not forced but natural. A little het-he escaped him and his hand rose to cover his mouth, muffling his giggle. It was cute. She let out a giggle of her own, laughing at her own mistake.

The initial awkwardness faded away as they both laughed and sighed out their nerves.

-

Far into the crowd, Wooyoung felt a form press against his back, firm and hot. If it wasn’t for the wave of medicinal herbs burning at his nose, he would’ve elbowed them in the gut.

“Sannie,” he cooed out, wriggling a bit. “I was looking for you.”

“Yunho had a lot more to talk about than business,” he sighed, his nose buried into Wooyoung’s shoulder.

Wooyoung gave the other man’s hands a squeeze, reassuringly. Silently giving him support.

“About YN?” he guessed. 

“Yunho wants to meet her,” San said into Wooyoung’s ear. “Alone.”

“Why?” Wooyoung countered with a frown.

Shifting in his lover’s embrace, he glanced over San’s shoulder, trying to catch a glimpse of Yunho walking away from the tournament. Jealousy clung to his bones like a disease. He already was getting used to sharing his swan with San – and while it wasn’t unfavorable or irregular for the men to share things, he liked having his dates and time with YN.

“Not that he’ll take away the coins we use; Captain would never let him, but -” San reassured, massaging the back of Wooyoung’s neck reassuringly. He leaned forward, whispering into his ear.

“But he is curious why we are spending money on some doll.” His lips pressed to the shell of Wooyoung’s ear.  

Wooyoung didn’t like that, teeth baring and eyes hot. “She’s not some doll.”

“I told him that,” San retorted quick. “She ain’t.”

Wooyoung settled at that and shut his eyes, head twitching as San’s fingers dug into a tight muscle deliciously painful.

“Not Mingi?” Wooyoung tried to pitch. Mingi, despite his cold demeanor, was the softer of the duo.

“Captain’s orders,” San stated, resolute.

He sighed out at that, growing limp in his San’s embrace reluctantly. San continued to massage the fine knots at the back of his neck. 

“How?” Wooyoung followed up after a few moments.

San glanced over at the sight of their dancer, talking to Yeosang easily as the man covered his mouth in a giggle. He had an idea.

-

“Did you enjoy yourself?” Wooyoung asked as they strolled along.

She smiled over at him, bright, as she hugged his arm. “I did. You made it seem like it’d be like pulling teeth. Yeosang was nice!”

More than nice, he was charming. After WooSan left them alone, they had kicked it off, falling into conversations about their childhood devotion to their individual crafts. She learned how he began playing tennis at age five and was shipped from Aurora to Hala to Paradise growing up to compete and train. He was in the limelight alone for so long and while he was good at conversing and playing his part he was dreadfully shy. He admitted it bashfully to her and she felt a wave of comradery.

She liked him. Almost immediately.   

Wooyoung huffed dramatically, liking how close she was as she teased him.

“It is when you aren’t there,” he lamented. “I swear, it’s a boring affair once you do it a couple million times. And Yeosang isn’t always trying to impress us, pretty girl.”

She laughed and he smiled. There was a comfortable lull in the air as they continued their walk. The sun was beginning to set and, while the sky was a frosty shade of grey, there was no snow on the ground or in the air. Few folks were out braving the chill but, with Wooyoung closer to her and San’s oversized coat over her shoulders, she was warm.  

(San had chastised her about forgetting the gifted jacket, but she saw as he preened as he took off his over-coat with much dramatics. Flexing and shifting his tie around his neck to tempt her, she swore. His jacket swallowed her up pleasantly and she saw his ears burn red. He liked her in his things. He imagined her in a fur coat; he fixed his tie again, swallowing hard.)

“Thank you for inviting me.” She breathed after a moment. Her chest felt lighter after everything. “It was better than sewing and delivering things all day.”

“I’m glad I did,” he replied gently. Even if his mind was circling over how he was going to have her meet Yunho, he decided to do what he did best: live in the moment. He’d figure it out how to handle his lovers’ piqued interest. “You seem happier. I can always get you out of trouble, or into trouble.” He jested his arm tugging from hers to wrap around her waist, inappropriately for the public eye (But, there was no one about, Wooyoung decided. Besides he wasn’t for rules anyways.) His fingers tickled over her ribs making her laugh out and cry out his nickname in giggles.

A picture-perfect snapshot of young love, so the figure from the alleyway thought. Ducking his head, he crept out of his spot after the couple passed by. His dark coat blended in with the brick walls and the steam that pillowed out of the nearby apartments’ heating unit hazed him. The dark silhouette of a man watched as they continued along for a moment before turning on his heel and walking the opposite direction. The only evidence of him ever being there were his footprints in the snow with the impression of the name brand emblemed into the snow.

Faith.

-

San looked like some statue from the Renaissance. Carved in ivory. Laid back on a gold-gilded sofa, he was draped in an all-white attire, long pants with an open-vested shirt that revealed more golden skin than it hid. Ever since their kiss, she swore he wore more tantalizing outfits – was this his way of flirting?

He grinned at the attention of the other ballerinas; each one eyed him up, but were unable to approach. If they did, they learned he would openly ignore them. The only one he had an eye for was her. Only YN could approach him. And that’s what he wanted in the end.

Unlike Wooyoung who would wait at her vanity, San wanted YN to search him out in the boudoir. Willingly. And when she did, he had a flare of butterflies dancing in his chest. He took a deep swig of his drink, eyes half-lidded as he watched her in her little feathered tutu.

“Hello honey,” he smiled, resting the drink on his outstretched knee as she approached. “Looking gorgeous as always.”

“Thank you,” she said. With a gentle hand outstretched, he encouraged her to join him on the velveteen sofa. He pressed a quick kiss to her forehead, sweet and warm.

“How much time do you have to spare?” he asked, feline-like eyes not even glancing at the nearby grandfather clock in the corner of the foyer de la danse.

“As much as you’d like,” YN said. The words were what the other girls insisted their patrons adored. Attention and control.

San’s lips twitched.

“Do you have other things to attend to before Act 2?” San queried.

“I’ve changed already – with Wooyoung, it takes twice the time,” she admitted.

Wooyoung, while he kept his hands to himself and his eyes averted when she changed, loved attention. He loved to talk talk talk about nothing and when he caught her attention shifting to things such as her makeup or her hair, he’d insist to doing it. While applying her lipstick, he’d steal a kiss, staining his mouth red more often than not. While charming and kind, it slowed her process down. With San, she had been prepped for Act 2 in a matter of minutes and now well had all the time in the world (approximately twenty minutes.)

San chuckled lowly, his thumb brushing over her waist gently almost questioningly. Behind his spectacles, a brow raised. Tap, tap, tap. May I? She’s learned his silent questions; his gentle ways to check with her what she was thinking before initiating anything. She scooted a bit closer. His smile was genuine, soft, and warm as his arm wrapped around her waist more. He pulled her half onto his lap; the smell of his cologne encompassing her. He smelt warm, like a forest on fire, with a hint of something medicinal biting at the back of her nose. Familiar yet dangerous.

If there was one major difference between her two patrons, it was this; San always asked of her rather than did for her. His touches were always slow and deliberate and never pressing. Not that Wooyoung was overtly so, but he was less careful. He’d leap before asking, taking her rouge pot into his hand to dab it on her cheeks softly. San would ask, would lean close, and would smile his sweet smile. “May I?” San’s voice rumbled and she couldn’t help but feel her heart tremble in her chest. He’d pull his leathered gloves off with his teeth before warm fingers would smear the red over already-blushed cheeks. He’d always take pride in her flush.

As they sat, he liked to listen to her. He’d take sips of his drinks, occasionally offering her a sip. Sometimes she’d take a gentle taste, her lipstick leaving a red halo on the rim. His lips would cover that ring with a smirk as he took his next gulp.

“Wooyoung distracts,” he admitted. “He used to distract me a lot when we worked together.”

“How did you two meet?” YN asked, legs slung over one of San’s legs.

San’s hand stroked over her waist. “We met as kids. Got into trouble together, but we ended up alright.” He hummed. “Yeosang was there, too. We weren’t as talented as him… skilled.”

YN still smiled, trying to imagine a tiny Wooyoung, Yeosang, and San running through the streets… would Aurora have the layered upon layered apartments like Cromer or was it open sands? Their skin was a tawny gold in the gas-light of the boudoir, but were they even warmer in the golden sun of Aurora’s beaches?

“How did you get into all of this, honey? Woo said your mother is a factory worker?” He didn’t mention her father. “How did a pretty girl get looped into the ballet system?”

It was a shame it was seen so negatively in his eyes but, after their discussion the night they met, she assumed San saw all of this as false glitz and glamour for the obscene. Even if he did compliment her talent and strength often.

“I started at the age of three. My mother was a seamstress for the Opera occasionally. I’d cause havoc… bug the performers. It was then I started to practice with the others. I thought it’d be easy to become like the Prima Ballerina. She seemed so beautiful and happy and strong.” YN commented. She wondered if the childhood hero ever suffered under her Madame or a patron. She tried not to imagine so. Her childhood dream could remain spotless for now.

Flexing her toes in her pointe shoes and lifting her leg from his lap into an arabesque, she giggled temptingly. “It’s much harder.” Her leg was at eye-level with his gaze. She was sure the others were glaring daggers at her back. She was acting scandalous, but with him there was nothing to scandal. He’d look at her with reverence, regardless.

If he looked close at her leg, he’d see bruising from practices or whacks from the Madame’s cane. Like always, he proved himself to be observant, more observant than Wooyoung she thought. Giving her a single glance, his fingers wrapped around her ankle, encompassing it. She didn’t jolt or yelp or shift. Her eyes stayed locked on his as he placed his glass down to press a supportive hand over her back now. His fingers danced over her leg; his hand glided up her calf, over her knee, and barely grazed her thigh. Just a faint tip, tap, before his gaze settled back onto her. It sent gooseflesh over her in a whirl. Intimacy. He was stroking her skin with such teasing lightness as if it was any more respectable.

His eyes were intense. Intriguing and magnetic and kind. Despite his bulky form, despite the hint faint scarring she could see over his masculine face, he didn’t frighten her. 

“Your pretty skin bruised is the last thing I want to see,” he commented lowly, thumb brushing over a particularly large splotchy patch of green-purple skin on her knee. Guiding her leg higher and higher, his gaze watching hers as he pressed a soft kiss to the skin, as if his lips could heal her. It made gooseflesh burst forth on her legs obviously now. He took in the sight with silent approval.

“Do you ice your legs?” he asked as he lowered her leg to his lap.

“I try,” she admitted, voice trembling from her wooing. “We all do, but when practice or a performance goes over, I can’t ice them until late at night or in the morning.”

He frowned at that. His thumb brushed over her knee again before lifting his hand to grab his icy drink once more. “If you need to ice while we talk, you will,” he insisted. “All I want you is healthy and happy, honey.”

He tutted, eyes glancing aside as if remembering things he didn’t share.

“You need to ice it as soon as the injury happens.” He added. “From now on.”

He raised his glass, finishing his drink. The ice clinked against the crystal as he lowered it to the sofa before he reached inside to grab the ice cube with his bare fingers. Picking up the large ice cube, he pressed it against her bruised skin suddenly. YN jumped against the cold, against the sudden chill that made more goosebumps rise to her skin. Her arms and legs were covered, on alert. Yet he didn’t even flinch as the frost bit at his fingertips.

He hummed, watching as her eyes squinted shut in shock from the cold. As she shivered… maybe in pain. San had smiled, shifting the now-melting ice cube over her large bruise in a slow circling motion.

“It’ll feel better soon,” San reassured.

-

Pain crashed up her legs in an icy cold torment. Stabbing, hot yet chilling pain. Both ankles were in casts, elevated by firmly place pillows, but, in her agony, she shifted this way and that. She couldn’t help the whimpers that overtook her. Like an ocean, she was swallowed up by the pain as she was thrusted awake.

“Oh, angel,” there was a soft, almost sing-song of a voice.

A cool hand brushed over her hot forehead soothingly. In her delirium, she could barely make out his face. Just a blur of familiar slicked hair and familiar eyes. Sweat tumbled down her face; baby hairs sticking to her skin. Tears poured of her flushed cheeks, over-heated and sticky. Everything was blurry. She was all sweaty. He swept them away with deft hands.

Somehow in her whirlwind of pain and tears, she could still smell him despite congestion in her nose.  That tropical aroma that followed him around like Aurora was chasing after him. Hot pineapple sweet and pungent, thick jasmine blossom rotting in the summer sun, the stink of sea salt tangled around her throat. She let out a cry as a particular sharp pain shot up her left leg; she curled inward, moving her legs. It only forced out a wail as they stung with agony. Any movement hurt. How could the pain be that bad? Something had to be wrong. It hadn’t been like this before.

“Yunho.” His name was spoken firmly, almost a bark.

“He’s on this way, Captain,” Yunho’s voice reassured. A hand pushed aside the covers over her feet. “I don’t know what’s wrong.”

Someone rearranged her legs, whispering apologies as they did so. Her cries made their chest ache.

“She’s on medicine,” San’s voice was a sob. “I gave her it myself.”

“I don’t doubt it,” the soft voice of their Captain cooed to the distressed muscle of the gang. There was a sniffle.

“San, Mingi.” his tone was one of a leader; solid and firm and focused. “Go to Seonghwa; he’ll need you. Keep Wooyoung away.”

He hadn’t stopped caressing her forehead. Her eyes blinked blearily up at him. Full of tears, full of pain, his face remained cool and collected. Almost clinical in the way he looked over her. Pain was no stranger to him.

Yet in her eyes, he looked angelic, she swore. Like something from a Renaissance painting, haloed by the light of the roaring fire. Her delirium painted him in a cherubic way. An angel coming to save her. Protect her as he tugged her into his arms, cradling her broken burning limbs. Soft round cheeks she had loved to press kisses to. She couldn’t process his furrowed brow, his dark eyes. Just her Hongjoong.

“Joong,” she murmured, her voice cracking.

Even now, he leaned forward, pressing his forehead to hers. “I’m here,” he reassured, voice loving.

She felt aflame, a woman on fire. A fever crashed through her.

“Hurts.” She whined out.

“I know, I know,” his gentleness felt foreign. He was always gentle with her; why did it feel like a farce? How did she end up here? Her mind was a blur. She heard him bark out another order, another command. “Bring me that damn doctor now! Jongho, do you have it?”

Her throat closed up in a gasp as she trembled in his arms; a sharp stab to her waist was barely felt compared to the pain radiating up her legs. Blink, blink, her eyes could barely make out Hongjoong staring down at her. A look of disappointment, fear, and anger hazed any love for a moment even as she tried to find his name in her mouth. Lips moving in the shapes of his vowels and consonants failingly until exhaustion washed over her once more.

“Joo—n—ng” His nickname faded from her consciousness as she felt her entire body, sluggishly slow, fall into a honeyed rest.

“I’ve got you, angel. It’ll feel better soon. I promise.”

[mad-as-a-box-of-frogs]

just got obsessed with marcsteven whats the best long fics? HELP

yeeesss welcome to the delights of Moonmoon shipping, anon sadasasdasd 🤍🤍 I just love those two so much 😭

That being said, as far as long fics for Marcsteven go, it's unfortunately slim pickings with how tiny this fandom is *SOBS* (nearly all my faves are WIPS that haven't updated in a year or more ;-----;). So if you're okay with me defining "long fic" as fics 20k or over, here are my personal finished faves!

Adjustments by Nagem and its Marcstevenjake sequel, Waiting Room. Ughhhh I was obsessed this pair when they came out.

All this time I was waiting for you by Nakimochiku. Just Marc and Steven being pinning oblivious idiots with slowly simmering sexual tension ;) Also I loved everything Moon knight related by this author, i read their stuff again and again all the time <3

If you don't mind expanding your horizons to include Marcstevenjake, definitely give In the Aftermath series by Queenie a try (or at least the first three Marcsteven-only fics in the series).

What the Right Hand is Doing by Erinptah was such a gem (and try out their Cover by Knight series if you like Moon knight crossovers with other MCU characters. Now THAT'S a long fic [series])

Love Song for a Deadman and The Measure of Things by friight. Actually one of the few fics on here that actually reach past 50k ^u^;; And both are so good!!!

See Through My Act, Tell Me I'm Wrong by snapdragonpop007 is a fandom favorite, and another author whose MK work I will always devour <3

All the Ashes of Our Days, As If it Were the Last Time and Until You Drown all written by MitchieSawyer, and they're some of my favorites fics that have come out within the last year, a year that has otherwise been nearly dead for Marcsteven fic. {Ashes made me sob !!!] And their current WIP, The Less I Give, the More I Give Back, is a wonderful arranged marriage fic, with Marc and steven's contrasting approaches to their Jewish heritage a main focus, and has been updating more or less every week!!!!

And ... if like I said you're willing to give polycule Marcstevenjake a shot.... and take a chance on a WIP.... you really really should check out Miles From Nowhere by fishtrombone. Anon, I am OBSESSED with this fic. It hasn't been out a full year yet and it's already at 350k!!!! Technically the longest fic in the fandom and still more to come!!! Marc, Steven, Jake split into separate bodies and stranded in America, bottlenecked in a run down cabin and navigating their complex relationships as the apocalypse looms!! Angsty as shit! Possibly one of my favorite fics of all time, this fic has pulled me along the full spectrum of human emotions the writing is almost painfully beautiful at times, the characterization is spot on {and yes reccing because I need more people to read this fic and give it kudos and encouragement <3)

And in case you didn't see, here's my previous marcsteven rec post where I rec marcsteven fics under 500 kudos !

Hope this helps, Anon :D

[fluffypotatey]

What introduced you to lmk? like some fanart or a tiktok edit

For me it was a nezha edit (it was a leak at the time, but obviously I didn't know it) and I loved its design so much that I decided to see lmk, previously I knew that the series existed since I really like everything that has to do with Sun Wukong (and the journey to the west and Nezha too of course)

my love of lmk was a slow burn that then sparked into an inferno

FOR YOU SEE

it began while i was watching OSP’s jttw summarized videos and listening to their podcast and there were some people asking Red if she watches the show (she hadn’t and prob still has not because her reason was by simply not watching it, she wouldn’t accidentally have their style influence her own. also ensuring that her summarized videos stayed original)

then i noticed some fanart of lmk on instagram (idk how that happened tbh maybe the algorithm took my interest in fanrtists of animated movies and shows to equal “hey you might like this too!”) but since i had no clue what lmk really was and was more loyal to jttw itself, i ignored it (tho one of the fanartists drew really good kung fu panda fanart so i saw lmk for about a month or too before i deleted my instagram)

and then i saw a lot of lmk in the comments of OSP’s video about the Six Eared Macaque chapter but ignored it still

and then tumblr polls happened

many polls were made. many ship dynamic polls were made

there was also the character of all time poll, of which i was a Sun Wukong activist and found some lmk fans who reblogged my propaganda thread

(during this time— April— I discovered Epic: the musical)

i found lmk once more in the sun/moon ship poll. it was merthur vs shadowpeach and i stayed true to my ship, Merthur, but i noticed one of my (then) mutual-in laws was very passionate about shadowpeach and i grew curious

i searched it up (beginning of May), somehow found a playlist with seasons 1-3 two days after i began my search, watched all of it in a day (it should be noted that i had been recovering from finals) and found myself hooked

I also felt cheated out of the shadowpeach ship because, through the eyes of my (then) mutual-in law, the ship seemed to be popular on tumblr. then all the shit i see on YouTube is spicynoodles and people arguing in the comments that shadowpeach are brothers

anyway

i found out very quickly that the show did scratch a special itch in my brain (it almost didn’t if i’m being honest. i was almost put off by MK and Mei’s personalities at first but figured i would wait if our since AHiB is only the show’s pilot) and now i wanted more

i went onto twitter bc i struggled to find fanart on tumblr

i realized there was a 4th season already out (also weird discord drama???? idk i only was there for the art) AND some nice metas to dip my toes in

i leave twitter and go to yt to find the 4th season (and also bc there was a whole thing on twt about new accounts getting called out for being “pro-shippers” so i decided to tap out) and then found out about Monkey King 2009 (which i watched to stave off the desire of s4 but this backfired bc i got obsessed with that one too and only 12 episodes are subtitled for it— edit: NOT ANYMORE!!!!)

AND THEN I FIND SEASON 4

i watch it all and realize i have to wait for the s4 special, but i am more prepared for it (and now i feel more comfortable interacting with lmk tumblr) which leads to me making my own metas (this was spurred by my desire for more swk metas)

and thus i found and curated my lmk fandom experience on tumblr and satiated my brain with metas and fics and art until s4 special and then rinse and repeat until s5 :D

[moondialdoodles]

*points at you* hoi :3

I've seen you talk bout a lotta things but nit Mario rpg so far! What makes it interesting to ya? What do ya enjoy about it? :3c

I’m so sorry for the very very long post you’re about to read.

This franchise has been everything to me ever since I first discovered it as a kid, to the point where I have most definitely obsessed over it for.. literally years at a time.

Full post under the cut due to length.

So! I’d known about these games since I was.. I want to say eight years old. I was obsessed with Mario ever since I had gotten my first console, the DSI, when I was six. I discovered the M&L series from YouTube, after begging my mom to let me watch videos there. From that point on, I discovered the game’s soundtracks, gameplay videos, etc. I’d watch them for hours on end, over and over. I was utterly hooked. Having Mario games with these cool new locations? New villains? The music that I could listen to for hours and hours on end?? An actual story? It was the best thing ever! A short time after discovering them, I discovered Mario roleplaying games on Roblox, which only fueled my love for the idea and games. Eventually I got my very first M&L game, Dream Team, on the year of release! I played it obsessively. Every day, every night, for hours and hours and hours. It never bored me. The characters had me fascinated, the humor made me giggle, just everything about the game was perfect to capture my mind, who already was obsessed with storytelling at the time. The bros themselves were the best part at first, thanks to me adoring their dynamic. I loved the games properly exploring their brotherly relationship, and how much they cared for eachother. It seeped into a lot of the stories that I’d written for them, and I couldn’t get enough of it. Really for the longest time the best part of the games to me was the bros. Though that didn’t last too long. At the age of fourteen, I’d gotten my hands on the Superstar Saga remake! After begging my parents to buy me the rest of the games, SSS was the very last game I needed to complete my collection.

This game

This game was my downfall.

If my obsession wasn’t bad before, this game started the true obsession. The environment, the characters, the music, the story, I loved it. Peasley was my favorite character out of the bunch, and he still is, of course. I never payed much attention to him until I saw the Royal brat in action. Yeahhh. Yeah. He had my heart. Smug, valiant, he somehow hit every mark for little ol me. That was the start of it all. From that point onwards, at the age of fifteen specifically, I started making a buttload of headcanons, lore to fill in the gaps, and finally, ocs. A lot of ocs. It turned into its own big ol story! It’s been now.. seven years of me doing this!! A lot’s happened, and I’ve grown a lot! Those stories have grown with me, and it’s honestly the thing I’ve poured most my heart into. It’s aged like milk, because yes, stories created when you were fifteen or sixteen aren’t gonna be the equivalent of picasso, but I still adore it and love it to bits. It’s my baby, I’ll die for that baby. It’s.. quite literally my own little love letter to the franchise and how much it’s shaped my life. My writing wouldn’t be the same without it, and neither would anything else. This franchise is a part of me, and always will be. With Brothership releasing soon, I can only see my little obsession growing.

The writing is so charming and goofy, and I have to thank the games for influencing me so much in that regard. They always make me laugh or smile, or feel so much. The animations add onto all of that, and make the game feel so… alive! The stories have always been so unique and fun, giving me years of thoughts and smiles, and the characters have always made me the happiest person alive.

M&L is my favorite franchise. It always will be. I’m so happy that I was able to discover it, and have so much of it shape my life. I wouldn’t be who I am today without it!

But, you wanted to hear why I liked M&L, so here you go! I think my favorite games in order tho have to be…

Superstar Saga, Dream Team, Bowser’s Inside Story, Partners in Time, and Paper Jam. I’ll see where brothership places when it releases!

I need to post my Mario stuff more, and maybe I’ll get to talk about all my silly things more often. If you’ve been my friend for any time at all, you know how much this franchise means to me. It’s.. a several hour long conversation, which a lot of them have had the misfortune of hearing.

Trust me, over 80 ocs and over a decade of obsessing over one little franchise does something to a girl.

Hope you enjoyed this read though, I’m glad to be able to share it with everyone!

[we-keep-odd-hours]

tagged back by @hex6rcist! Thank you!

under a cut since I also rambled.

1. How are you!? I hope your day is going well.

ehhhh. I'm working not a great job, but its from home and if everyone is going to be insufferable, every single second i get of downtime I'm going to be on tumblr to stay sane.

2. What are you currently working on? Any little projects of any kind you’re excited to share?

I have an original novel in the works, I'm in the brutal final stages of tying off the loose ends of the rough draft (while this advice is some that I struggle to accept, to all writers I'd like to share this: the only thing that a first draft has to be is done.), I have two on-going fics (an Aliens one that's posted anonymously but tbh you could probably find it easily) and one of Diamondback's origin story.

Her origin story is more or less done (posting new chapters as I edit) except for a few plot points I'll make my decision on as I get to them in editing. There's details from my next project, a full follow up to the movie, that I kind of want to include in an epilogue to her story, since they're scenes/plot threads tied on her character arc.

3. What have you been watching lately? I just finished Righteous Gemstones and I need a new show lol.

I'm halfway through my rewatch of Hannibal right now, and I SHOULD rewatch West World next so I can finally watch the last season, but I've been itching to rewatch X-Files for a year now....the only problem being that X-Files is nine seasons, a mini series, two seasons of Millennium (IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND), and one season of Lone Gunmen (ALSO IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND). I never technically finished Millennium either, because they [spoiler] and it made me so angry at Chris Carter that I rage quit.

4. (A Near Dark one because how can I not) what’s your favorite small detail in the movie that other people might overlook?

When they first walk into the bar, Jesse kind of surveys the layout, but Diamondback immediately looks over to her right--at the bartender and the waitress, she then smiles, holds onto Jesse's arm and sets her head on his shoulder--and looks over the waitress again. Between that and her grin when the woman walked over, that whole weird thing seemed like some continuation of whatever game they were playing when she kissed the hitchhiker, which....guys, get a room. Homer and Mae are right there.

There are others, but this is the first one that came to mind.

5. What blog should I follow right now?

I'm bad at this; most people I've followed on here for literal years, or else picked up along the way when we had the same media obsession of the day.

6. Best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

I said it above already, but THE FIRST DRAFT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE GOOD, IT JUST HAS TO BE DONE.

7. If you could add one fantastical element to the real world and have it be a commonly accepted and known about thing what would it be? (Ie make Santa real)

This is asking for trouble: I believed in fairies at an age that was much, much too old to do so. I think it would be fun, or at least interesting if the fair folk were commonly known to exist. Dangerous, unwise, but fun.

8. What’s the last book you didn’t just read, you DEVOURED?

In the Valley of Sun by Andy Davidson. It was nasty, infuriating, full of characters I didn't like for but occasionally felt bad for, and it's about a wandering killer turned vampire living in an old RV just outside of Waco, TX in the 1980s. Yeah, that's what I thought too.

It was a break-neck paced mystery, not exactly of ''who'' did it, but of what happened, how did they do it, and are they going to get caught?

9. What are you most passionate about?

Art, literature, zoology. The order of those items changes frequently.

10. What do you think is your best quality?

oh I hate this question. Passion, I guess? It's not easy to get interested in something, but when I am, I can learn fast, pick up on details, and make weird connections. I'm literal minded and frequently get over-detailed on things, but I can think on multiple tracks at once and have caught things that even our Risk department at work didn't notice because they disrupted something.

[ettadunham]

inon zur, the man you are.

is this cheating? maybe. possibly. probably.

okay, so context. i have been doing this thing where i play a random adventure game spit out by a random generator program i created (because i'm a nerd). as a result, every now and then, you'll find a short write-up about some weird obscure little video game on my tumblr blog. it's just one of the many things that you have to put up with if you decided to follow me for whatever reason. sorry.

then one day, said randomizer spit out syberia 3, and let me tell you, i was delighted! this was the first time i had a game i already played on my list, so obviously, this meant a replay. but not just any replay. i now had to replay the entire series! obviously.

is this what i've done for other games that came up before? no. but you guys don't understand.

syberia is my special little guy.

syberia 1 and 2 are not only largely the reason for my long-lasting obsession with adventure games, they have arguably raised me. i am the human person i am today because i played syberia while listening to complicated by avril lavigne when i was 12. these are the foundations and building blocks of my personality. everything that's wrong with me comes back down to this.

so, yeah. to say that i was excited to get back to this one is a slight understatement. i was vibrating on a frequency previously undetected in human physiology.

i also start with all this to emphasize that, yeah. i have my rose-tinted nostalgia glasses on when it comes to these games. that doesn't mean i don't have my criticisms, especially looking at the game today, but... i cannot not love syberia. it's just science.

i should probably talk about the game itself at some point though, right? i can't just assume that the one person reading this (i see you! hey! thank you <3) is as familiar with the ins and outs of voralberg automatons as i am. so, let's do a synopsis.

syberia is a 2002 point-and-click game about a lawyer named kate walker, who hyperfixate on her work mission to find an old man a bit too much, while going on a train adventure with an autistic-coded automaton named oscar. hijinks ensue!

the game was designed by french developer benoît sokal (rip, king) as a follow-up to his previous game, amerzone. as a kid, i have played through all of his games i could get my hands on, but it's been a while, so i can't quite tell you how much those hold up. from what i remember, he definitely liked his adventurer protags... as well as some potentially questionable depictions of made-up indigenous people.

...let's circle back to that after syberia 2.

but yeah, while we're here, let's actually get some of my criticisms out of the way. this is a game from 2002 written by a french dude and... you could say that it's of its time among other things. for instance the man kate is looking for is mentally disabled, and the game is a bit too liberal in its use of the 'r' word to describe him. (and yes, it was considered an offensive and derogatory term in 2002 too, people were just more inclined to use it back then.)

there are other aspects of the game that one might critique as well, that i mostly find charming. the dialogue is at times clunky (almost as if it was written by someone whose native language is not english...), but the voice actors do a nice job adding character (and possibly tweaking their lines just enough) that it absolutely works on me to this day. it's a little wacky, a little silly, the puzzles sometimes require some pixel hunting, but that's just how these games work!

this one also had the cocktail puzzle, which, in my opinion, is one of the best in the entire series. it really has everything! when i become super rich, i'm going to build that cocktail machine in my house.

other highlights of the game include the big communist boi looming over you in komkolzgrad and just... any other automaton or mechanical machinery in the game. including your train, obviously.

the overall aesthetics of the game? immaculate! i want all my devices to work with a wind up mechanism now.

the one thing though that, in my opinion, truly elevates syberia over its contemporaries is its music. god, the music!!! most people might be familiar with inon zur through his scores for games like the later fallout or dragon age games, but to me, he's always gonna be the guy who went so insanely hard for this somewhat niche little adventure game series.

his score coupled with the automaton designs and the beautiful scenery? absolutely breathtaking. prettier than any modern game.

in conclusion: kate walker, call me!

EDIT: as it was just pointed out to me by @greyaged, the first syberia game was actually scored by nicholas varley and dimitri bodiansky, and only from syberia 2 onwards did inon zur become the series' main composer. needless to say that they all did a fantastic job, but i definitely want to give an extra shout out to varley and bodiansky here, now that i know that they were the ones responsible for this particular game's score. the tracks and motifs they introduce here carry over to zur's scores, and they definitely cement syberia's legacy as a game series with one of the most memorable video game soundtracks in my book. <3

[indigowriting]

Author Ask Tag

tagged by @tryingtimi (thank you tímea!) putting this below the cut for length ^.^

1. What is the main lesson of your story? Why did you choose it?

hm, i would say that the main, overarching lesson of most of my stories are that you have to live for the present, that getting stuck in the past and what has been and obsessing over that will only hold you back in the long run. this shows up in various works of mine—in r&r, the love interest has spent most of her life stuck in the past, for understandable reasons, and it's only after she's forced out of that time that she's able to begin to be her own person, rather than being tied to what happened, and in BIRCHLORN, the main character is only able to live a happy, fulfilling life once she puts the unresolved past to rest.

2. What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding?

a lot of what i write is historically inspired; r&r draws on a lot of my knowledge of the mid-ming dynasty, as well as media like the cnovel chssn and its adaptation, and the "present day" portions are inspired by my love of the china i grew up in, but melded with elements of futurism and scifi-esqueness (hence the time travel and the fact that it's no longer called china); BIRCHLORN is inspired by various transmigration novels, and my research into the tang dynasty, particularly the tang dynasty during the wu zhao interregnum under wu zetian, as well as elements of wuxia shows and novels. i also generally pepper in elements that i've picked up from tradpub novels i've enjoyed, making for a rather eclectic combination. the only one which isn't historically inspired is efaw, which is a futuristic scifi novel in space, but even then, it takes inspiration from cnovels like dmbj, tradpub novels like the locked tomb series, and elements from the ascendancy series by k. arsenault rivera, all thrown into space with my own spin. (i can't delve any further into efaw unfortunately, because i have yet to write it ^^***)

3. What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness or help the reader grow as a person?

birchlorn's bai hua is mostly just trying to make it out alive, because she has the unenviable status of having been transmigrated into a cannon fodder side character in the original plot. as for what i, as the author, am trying to achieve............well, i'll be honest, i don't have any lofty goals. i write because it's fun and because there are concepts that i haven't seen anyone else to do that i'd like to read. so i guess my goals are probably to put more lesbians in things haha.

4. How many chapters is your story going to have?

birchlorn SHOULD have ~fifteen chapters; i've written twelve of them so far. i'm not the best at writing very long things—birchlorn having a goal of 50k is already longer than anything else i've ever written for an original novel! as for r&r, i still need to go back and revise and chunk it into chapters (i wrote it all in one go over a week, without chapter divisions), but i'd guess about fifteen to twentyish chapters?

5. Is it fan fiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

i actually write a lot of fanfic, but my writeblr is strictly for my original works. my dream is to have one of my novels, maybe multiple, traditionally published, though i know that if that were to happen, it would take a lot of work, and be rather far off.

6. When did you start writing?

i started writing in 2013, but as for when i got serious about original writing, i would say that was when i started this blog, so around the start of 2023.

7. Do you have any words of encouragement for fellow writers of writeblr? What other writers do you follow?

my words of encouragement: write a lot! you can only get better, i promise. and have fun while you're writing! don't turn it into a chore, or something that stresses you out. as for other writers i follow, i follow a lot of writers! i couldn't list all of them out, there's so many, but i appreciate each and every one of them and love seeing their posts ^.^

no pressure tagging:

@thelittlestspider @onomatopiya @muddshadow @asher-writes and open tag for all my other followers!

[jadechase]

Ten people i'd like to get to know better

Tagged by @simonthesneasnake

Last song: Winter Anymore, by critical role. I think we can all establish that Ashley Johnson is a natural treasure, and she nailed this song aswell. Yasha really hits close to the heart, and Ashley's voice makes it a bullseye.

Favourite colour: a kind of dark blue, but its not really dark. It goes a bit towards green. Idk how to describe it but its lightdarkblue

Last book: Thieves Gambit by Kayvion Lewis, i havent finished it yet, but i blame school. Break has started so ill probably have it finished within a few days. Im really in love with it already. After that i think im gonna read sword catcher, wich i have already bought, and maybe ill finish Percy Jackson and the chalice of the gods, but im kinda saving that for a sad day cause it just gives me that nostalgia giggles.

Last Movie: Bad mom's 2, its a Christmas movie and it was actually pretty funny. I watched it with my mom, since she wanted to watch a Christmas movie with me and this one didnt seem all too bad. If we're talking kind of movies i like: marvel and Disney movies, but basically anything fantasy with sparks of humor and trauma (yes Disney does trauma in their movies you just have to look for it)

Last tv-show: Does critical role count? If not i would bet it is the legend of vox machina. Yes im critically critical role obsessed, they have become a part of me. But anyways i really wanna watch arcane and even more so since some of my friends from the uk told me its really good and id really like it. I also watch a lot of British detectives, no im not from Britain, but i wouldnt know wich one i watched last+its something of a tradition with my parents so i didnt really count them.

Sweet/savoury/spicy: Sweet>Savoury>spicy,

I love spicy food but i dont really crave it, i would also say it really depends on the moment and what ive eaten already cause my stomach is very specific with what it can handle at a certain moment of my day...

Relationship status: Singleeeeeee. Isnt everyone? No i just tell myself that. Seriously tho i really dont mind it, its something i choose for myself as i believe i dont really have the time for a relationship. I do have the time im just not willing to sacrifice it wich i think says enough. (Also im pretty young so im good)

Last thing I googled: Sims 4 cheat codes, I installed the game a week ago and got some spare time on my hands yesterday so I decided to play a bit, the game however went a little too slow for my stress-powered brain so i decided to speed up the process.

Current obsession: Critical role/bg3, i am in love with the cr cast and they really feel like older siblings to me, as i am an only child. And bg3 just is an amazing game and the voice actors are also such a lovely community (i sense a pattern here, Hmm) I am Particularly in love with aliona and jen(iffer English) they are such a cutesy couple and are just warmth all around.

Looking forward to:

WINTER BREAK

It starts tomorrow and i already have so many fun things planned. Im going ice skating, watching my series and hopefully catching up a bit on critical role c2. I am also really looking forward to having time to get better at New skills, i have been attempting to learn blender but have been stuck on the same part of a tutorial for 3 months. My reading has greatly diminished aswell so im hoping the Christmas spirit will have me reading in the mornings from the comfort of my warm bed. Also gonna see some family over the holidays (i see them a lot but theyre getting older so i really like spending time with them, it brings me peace)

Tagging (no pressure)

@annemarieyeretzian @sleepy-insomnia-bear @mightypike @girldalf @greatnightbat @mollymauk-widogast @laurasbailey @imisskeyleth @laudnasmoon @youremypeople

[otaku-tyriq]

Because someone already asked those questions about your fav anime/manga, can I ask your top 5 favorite western animations (can be movies or series)? Why love them?

Certainly you can dear anon ^7^

So some of my favourite western animations of all time include

1) Tangled

Why do I love it so much? Well it has been my absolute comfort movie since I was like 10 years old and watched this movie in theatres with my older sister. I also highly relate to Rapunzel, both due to her personality and her experiences with Mother Gothel. Also to this day I fully stand by the believe that Flynn/Eugene and Rapunzel’s relationship is the single most romantic and beautifully written Disney couple in this studio’s entire history. Lastly: THE ANIMATION IS GORGEOUS! And I think few people understand just how ground breaking this movie was in terms if 3D animation as back then animating hair, and most importantly that amount of hair that Rapunzel has, was a nightmare to animate in 3D, so the Studio had to essentially come up with an entirely new animation program specifically for the protagonist’s hair to move around in a natural way.

2) Lego Monkie Kid

Created by the Australian Studio Flying Bark Productions, the same Studio behind Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, this show means EVERYTHING to me. Because one thing rarely talk about on Tumblr: I am OBSESSED with Mythology. Greek Mythology, Roman, Mythology, Yoruba Mythology, Chinese Mythology, Norse Mythology etc. you name it. Like my bookshelf is nothing but Manga, history books and an astronomical amount of mythology and fairytale books. The show follows MK a hyper and optimistic boy as he is chosen to be the Monkey King Sun Wukong’s successor and learning to be a hero. So as you may have gathered this show is not only inspired by chinese mythology but essentially it’s equivalent of what Percy Jackson is to Greek Mythology. What I adore the most about this show are its characters and the GORGEOUS ANIMATION! I swear the fighting animation especially in this cartoon is smoother than butter!

3) The Owl House

Aka "What if Harry Potter was not written by a biggot”. If you’ve seen the pinned post on my blog, you know that Lumity is one of my absolute favourite sapphic ships. But honestly this ship is only the peak of the iceberg for why i adore this show. The beautiful artstyle, Luz’s character arc over the course of the show, EDA SIMPLY EXISTING AND BEING FANTASTIC, the beautiful world building and magic system, Emperor Beloz being an absolute irredeemable asshole in the most entertaining and bone chilling way. Srsly if you can dear Anon, give this show a watch.

4) Infinity Train

An Anthology Series who up until recently you could watch on Max HBO. This show is both delightfully funny and absolutely gut-wrenching and dark. The show essentially follows on a new set of characters each season who all end up getting trapped on a train with an infinite number of cars and they cannot leave the train until they essentially come to terms with and/or face some sort of trauma or other psychological issue they may be struggling with.

And as you may have guessed those themes of working through psychological issues is something that my mentally ill ass highly relates to. Not to mention these are some of the most well handled depictions of mental illnesses in animation i have seen in years. Especially given the show was originally targeted towards children and teenagers. I cannot recommend this show enough.

5) Nimona & Over the Garden Wall

I know you asked for only Top 5 Favourite western Animations but I seriously could not decide which one I prefered so they gotta share the spot. Hope you don’t mind 😊.

Starting with Nimona: I mean what else is there to say about Nimona that has not been said before? Fantastic and unique world building? Check. Absolute comedy gold? Check. Openly Queer characters? Check. Said characters also being absolutely loveable? Check. A heartfelt message for both adults and children? CHECK. Seriously this movie is just gorgeous and on Youtube FOR FREE! Like there is nothing stopping you from watching it right this instant.

Now onto Over the Garden Wall: I come from a country where we don’t typically celebrate Halloween. So due to a lack of direct cultural ties to Halloween I never truly had any super strong interest in Halloween movies and never had the urge around October to bundle up in a blanket and watch those classic Halloween movies and shows, like some of my friends do. The most I did was carve pumpkins with my sister and drink hot cocoa cuz it’s genuinly fun. Until this Mini Series came along. The atmosphere just absolutely perfectly manages to capsulate the feeling of autumn and the eeriness of that season. Far more than any other Halloween Classic in my humble opinion. Also again I’m a huge mythology Nerd and this show is basically Dante’s Inferno for children in very weird way. But yes ever since this show had come out I instantly rewatch it the second the leaves start to fall outside.

[thetobiroppofan]

one piece rant #4 (i think): the tobiroppo and why i love tjem

one day im going to be famous and whether it be for murder or a simple delusion in my mind it WILL happen one day trust me on this those who read this post. anyways i talk like my business is everyone elses deal cause it IS i mean im posting this to STRANGERS!!! ON THE INTERNET!!! i dont CARE if im judged its the INTERNET. i am THE internet gremlin. ohmygod shoot me for that i change my mind.

anyways this isnt what this post is about (pro tip: if you think youre funny write a script and go animate something i estimate soon we'll be needing the next batch of funny animated youtubers soon like jaiden animations and does anyone remember that one guy with the demon horns?? i think his name was adam smth i used to watch his videos religiously)

I love the tobiroppo if you couldnt tell by my cool awesome username. the tobiroppo are AWESOME. BEST villain group in one piece i dont CARE what anyone says. NO!! I AM NOT INCLUDING KAIDO OR HIS ALL STARS IN THIS. JUST THE TOBIROPPO.

LOOK AT THEM!!! THEYRE AWESOME!!! I LOVE THE TOBIROPPO. I MEAN IT WHEN I SAY IF I HAD THE CHANCE TO MEET THE TOBIROPPO AND THE ONLY WAY TO DO IT WAS THROUGH DYING I WOULD DIE!!!!!!!! LITERALY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ID DEFINITELY BREAKDOWN UPON SEEING THEM SINCE THEYRE SCARY ASF AND ALSO THEYRE SO COOL!!!!!! BUT ITS SOO WORTH IT!!!!!! HEAVEN HELL BE DAMNED I LOVE THE TOBIROPPO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

one day im gonna travel to japan and find eiichiro oda and stalk him until he breaks down and i force him to tell me EVERYTHING about the tobiroppo from all their dynamics with the other members to their least favorite food!! (ALL JOKES!!! I AM NOT GOING TO STALK ODA!!!)

anyways if i had to rank my favorite members to least favorite itd go in an order like this: 1. ULTI MY GOAT!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. BLACK MARIA MY QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

3. PAGE ONE MY MOODY NERDY TEENAGE BOYMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

4. SASAKI!!!!!!!!!! THE HOT ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5. The racist.

6. X-Drake. (i like him but not as a tobiroppo member he knows his place.)

who's who would be higher than 5 but i am a die hard jinbe fan (i say with the only piece of merch i have of him being a funko figure that holds my house keys) and that fishman racism was NOT!!!!!!!!!! cute.

sasaki shouldve gotten more screentime he was sooo fine i love you sasaki mwa

page one is LITERALLY!!!!!!!! me core (not really but let me be insane oh my GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) also i LOVE that one hc i saw one time where he has a special interest for dinosaurs like thats so real ily page one

black maria is THE cuntiest member of the tobiroppo. like have you SEEN her in the anime AUGH!!!!! THE THINGS ID DO FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE IS THE GIRLBOSS!!! MOTHER IS MOTHERING!!!!!! CURNTY!!! SINJIN DROWNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ULTI IS MY ALL-TIME FAVORITE THOUGH!!!!!! SHE IS THE TOBIROPPO MEMBER.

THIS SCREENSHOT OF HER IS SO CUTE I LOVE HOW TOEI DREW HER HAIR. ULTIS DESIGN IS ULTIMATELY ONE OF MY FAVORITES FROM THE SERIES ENTIRELY. I LOVE HOW COLORFUL HER HAIR IS AND HOW SHE LOOKS SO CUTE IN HER OUTFIT!!!!!!!! I LOVE HER HAIR TEXTURE AND HOW SHE HAS A CUTE LITTLE AHOGE AnD I LOVE HER LITTLE FLOWER MASK.

ODA!!!!!!!!!

DROP MORE ULTI CONTENT AND MY LIFE IS YOURS.

phew!! sorry gangalang (i say as a 15 year old white boy) i got carried away there. anyways when ulti dies so will i its me and her for LIFE.

i know the tobiroppo members either died or got arrested but in my head theyre living the same reality as the baroque works agents did because im insane over the tobiroppo.

I actually dont even know when this obsession started??? it mightve been when i started one piece which was like a year ago during july '23 (which oh my god?? a year's passed already since last year?? what the FUCK????)

but when i saw the tobiroppo (More specifically, sasaki, he started my obsession) a neuron activated in my brain and ive been OBSESSED with the tobiroppo (and one piece 'by extension' i argue despite having two large one piece posters, like 4 figures, and a stupid ugly law plushie right where i lay my head to sleep. sigh. he terrifies me, the buttsnatcher.)

i think originally my favorite member was sasaki, since i found that greenhaired fishman IRRESTISITIBLE (idk how to spell that word im a bit stupid) and then like idk the rest i dont actually rank my favorites tbh which i really should do in retrospect but its stressful when i have mixed opinions

anyways

i love the height differences between the members its so stupid and funny teehees

Also i need to be honest to you people of the internet but i cant be the only one who thinks page one's mask and hair and hat is like 2020 core

it isnt BAD i think he pulls it off its just when i saw him for the first time i thought "girl 2020 called they want their get up back"

he looks cute though i think he works it yasssssssssssss queen erm give them that nonbinary 2020 dsmp core!!

(I support all lifestyles and I am trans myself, please do not cancel me.)

on another topic i think page one autism hcs are real since like one thing and one thing only: his sit

I love him dont get me wrong, but it is hard to believe that hes any form of neurotypical with this sit. ankles crossed n everything. like my guy has GOT to get that autism diagnosis oh my god.

on another note there is a fly at the foot of my bed and i am going to have a mini heart attack i hate flies so much oh my god tumblr pleease send guns and cannons

i think id die to know the dynamics between ANY of the tobiroppo members outside of page one and ulti because i wonder if any of them were close friends. like

i wonder if they were like some form of friends??? also does EVERY tobiroppo member have some form of tattoo on their torso??

also while writing that i thought "wait a minute"

wake up babe new hc dropped: page one got inspired by who's who to have a chest tattoo of his name when he first joined.

ok thats it honestly i dont have anything else to say this was just a divulgence in my own taste tonight through yapping about nothing specific and just the tobiroppo in general. i really love the tobiroppo genuinely and after this i might make a list of my top 10 favorite one piece characters in general since itd be fun. ok bye gangalang

this is THE tobiroppo fan getting off and remember: i am the tobiroppo's fan trust me on this i love the tobiroppo so much if you see someone claiming to be a bigger fan than me tell me ill follow them back to their house and violently mutilate them (joking! i love you my fellow tobiroppo fans!)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

youngsheldonfan9992

[brilla-brilla-estrellita]

Trope Grading Game

I do not have Six Sentences for you this Sunday, so instead I'm finally doing this trope game that the lovely @artsyunderstudy tagged me in... some time ago. And thank you to @shrekgogurt for tagging me in Six Sentence Sunday this week!

Prior to Carry On, I mostly read Harry Potter fanfiction with a little bit of Percy Jackson and a little bit of Avatar: TLA thrown in there. I was pretty specific about what I liked in my fics in those days (which were primarily 10+ years ago), but the Carry On fandom has absolutely changed me. I'm not yet sure what is Carry On-specific or what applies outside the fandom because I haven't ventured back out again yet. So let's see who I am now...

Rules: How much do these tropes affect your decision to click on a fic?

-10 -> very dissuaded

0 - don’t care either way

+10 -> very enticed

nope -> if it’s a hard no and you’d never click on a fic with that tag or or you even have the tag blocked or you’d insta click out of the fic if it wasn’t tagged

Bonus points for explaining the rating and whether it’s conditional.

Age gap: -7

Would make me hesitate for sure. Depends a lot on the characters. If they're like... under 20, I'm probably not interested. If they're a little older, maybe? Idk, definitely sensitive here, but not quite a hard no.

Codependency: +3

Given how much I love Snowbaz, there's no way this is a turn off for me 😂

Obsession/Possessiveness, jealousy: +4

I'm going to quote artsyunderstudy's answer here because she already explained it perfectly,:

Complicated feelings. I'm kinda into it, so it definitely wont put me off, but jealousy as a trope can either be really fun in a story or really toxic. Like, I'm a little obsessed with Simon's jealousy in the series, because its not the kind where he gets mad at Baz, really, or lashes out at him, its very internal and about his own insecurity, but also really indicative of how very attached he is despite his assertions through wayward son that he was going to end things. I love a bit of possessiveness as long as its not the kind that hurts their partner or turns really bad to the point of me disliking the character. So, yeah, in most situations i'm a fan of exploring this, though I can't say I specifically look for it.

Opposites (grumpy/sunshine etc): +7

Yes! I do love a good grumpy/sunshine, black cat/golden retriever combo. Solangelo, anyone?

Enemies to lovers, Enemies with benefits: +10

Boy do I love me an enemies to lovers, and this has always been true (Dramione was my first non-canon ship... followed by Zutara, so. There's a theme here.) That was one of the major selling points of Carry On when my friend told me about it.

And enemies with benefits only if they end up actually having feelings for each other, ya know? If it's like... enemies that evolve to have benefits but never really have the emotional connection, meh. Though I can't say I've really run into that.

Friends with benefits: -2

Aaaand quoting artsyunderstudy here again because she nailed it, which... um... hm. I maybe am questioning certain aspects of my sexuality now... so... anyway......... 👀 Though I changed the rating to -2 because unless there's a tag telling me emotions are involved and important and leading somewhere, it's a turn off.

Ehhh is it benefits to full on love? I don't really connect with allo perspectives on sexual relationships, like I get them intellectually but I don't jive with them on an emotional level, so there has to be that emotional draw for me, that underlying romance. I mean tho, @fatalfangirl stacy is writing an excellent fic on this premise right now that I absolutely love because there are clearly feelings involved. But it also might fall more into the realm of the next trope on this list ... which is ...

Sex to feelings: -5

This one is new with Snowbaz (this was not at all a thing I read in previous fandoms. I was not ready for sexy fics back then.) It's another kind of weird one for me. I feel like it has to be accompanied by something else, but I can't tell you what off the top of my head. Like I don't know what this is missing right now... I think I just want the feelings to be there first? Idk, maybe I'll go read some fics like this and see if I can work out what I'm feeling here.

Actually I'm already having thoughts. I think the context of the sex has to be right. I'm not super into things like hookups because that sounds personally terrifying. Like... character a meets character b at a bar/event/etc and there's physical attraction and that's all they need. Just doesn't jive with me.

The only example I can think of off the top of my head that gets close, though doesn't exactly fit, is @facewithoutheart's "to do, to know, to want" with Gareth the Cherry Plucker. Except for this Sex to Feelings scenario it would need to be Baz falling for Gareth (which... HAH. I... I can't with that image.) But anyway. Context. Baz is going to Gareth for help and would then would develop feelings during/after the fact, and that would be fine. And I guess that's probably still about emotional vulnerability. Also hatefucking. That's fine too? Anyway, I'm losing my train of thought on this one.

Fake dating/relationship: +8

I quite enjoy the fake dating trope, especially when combined with enemies to lovers.

Friends to lovers: +5

Yes! Very cute. But also can have a lot of angst and I am more cautious about reading those and making sure I'm emotionally equipped to handle angst. So yes, but handled carefully.

Found Family: +10

I looooove found family stories! I love seeing people choose to care for each other even though they don't have a traditional familial or romantic bond. This is a big part of what I've loved about all of my favorite YA series. People taking care of and understanding each other in ways their families can't or won't and filling voids... I'm actually getting emotional just thinking about it ok moving on.

Hurt/Comfort: +10

As artsyunderstudy said: "It gives me the swoops." Yes. 100%.

Love Triangle: -10

I'm not sure I ever loved this trope, but I was ok with it. Now I think I am just generally over love triangles. The angst doesn't usually hit right and I end up feeling more annoyed with the character doing the choosing than anything.

Poly, open relationships: -3

I'm pretty sure this is my bias coming through. My introduction to the concept of open relationships was through some people that were... not... great... imo... I recently realized how much that first introduction colored my perspective and I'm trying to undo some of that. In addition, just the idea of my partner also being with other people makes me so incredibly jealous, which I know is also my own issue to work on. So I should probably actually read more fics in this area. Fics often help me work through these kinds of internal issues.

Mistaken/hidden identity: 0

I don't know if I've ever read a fic with this trope? Not feeling any particular way about it either.

Monsterfucking: +8

Oh, this is certainly new with Snowbaz. I remember a time when I was like "wow, no, absolutely not. I do not get it." And then Spadey came along...

Does this apply outside of Snowbaz? TBD. I so far haven't been interested in even Shepard's scandalous stories, so this may be Simon specific.

Pregnancy: -1

I am very confused. This is new with Snowbaz, which on it's own was a "?" moment for me. I was very unsure about mpreg at the start of this journey, but wanted to try it out and very quickly became fine with it. mpreg specifically is probably at a 0, maybe -1.

But pregnancy in general terrifies me. Not in the way where people are like scared of/grossed out by pregnant people. Other people being pregnant is fine. It just sounds so incredibly uncomfortable and painful that I'm like... no thanks? Don't really want to think about it for me. Very excited about it for you, though. But I haven't really read any non-mpreg fics, so I'm not sure where pregnancy as a whole falls... I'm going to go with like -1 because if it's not me it should be fine... maybe...

Second Chance: -9

artsyunderstudy again:

breakup angst wounds me deep ya'll. I hate thinking of them not together. I hate thinking of them thinking they are better off not together. I hate IT it makes me cry all of my tears.

But where she loves the coming back to each other, I just can't get past the breakup/betrayal/whatever it is that needs a second chance. It hurts too much to even finish.

Slowburn: +8

YES, but in the right mood. Sometimes I just need fluff and falling fast and I need it NOW. But otherwise, yes yes yes.

Soulmates: +6

I feel like I've missed out on this entirely. I can't think of any soulmate fics I've read? Or what qualifies as a soulmate fic as opposed to other fics with magical ties between people. So maybe I have read them? Idk. Sounds nice though.

I don't think I've seen anyone's posts for this game come across my dash aside from Ashton's, so if you've already done it... oops! My bad. Or consider this a last-minute Six Sentence Sunday tag: @onepintobean @thewholelemon @technetiumai @iamamythologicalcreature

[derekscorner]

I mean, I know many fans won't want to hear and just as many fans in the anti-mura crowd will praise it but the sad truth is that KH isn't relevant anymore. It hasn't been for years.

KH3 got a lot of buzz for reasons you already mentioned. It had been a sequel that many waited for since 2006. Many forgot KH existed until KH3 because they didn't follow after KH2 and it's hard to blame them.

If we're being technical the first misstep of "side games" was Chain of Memories. So many back in the day started Kh2 not knowing who Namine or Axel was. That issue just got worse when they continued the story with three games on three separate systems.

Then Nomura has this unhealthy obsession with KH Chi. Missing Link has a lot on its shoulders solely because KHUX did and KHUX bloated what was a decent self contained story in Chi for many.

Sure, you have remixes and ports now but the damage to the series is kinda done. Even if it's true that playing the games is all you need to do to follow the story that reputation for the opposite exists.

Hell, it's only exasperated by people who still dig into Nomura's quotes or the game reports through theory crafting. It's a sad truth that there is a lot of bloat behind the seams of the base story.

Then, when everything was finally in one spot, prepping for KH3 to release they put a huge chunk of story into UX and Dark Road. Yes, they're free, but how many average people will sit through hours of text box scenes just to understand why Xigbar is calling himself Luxu?

Some stuff just feels like bad decisions as well. Such as making Days a movie or trying to make Coded relevant with it's movie. Time travel. Sure, I am a dork and could grasp it fine but many people will groan or give up at the introduction of it. Many see time travel as lazy.

Then there was KH3 itself. I was so done with KH's BS by then that I spent most of the game indifferent only to be somehow disappointed with it's finale anyway.

Most of the game goes nowhere then the last 4 to 6 hours just goes nonstop. Xehanort's conclusion was just that disappointing for a lot of people and for others they see it as a good point to stop because they either don't care or played 3 just to see how Xehanort loses.

They don't have the patience or attachment to care about 4. Hell, I haven't even covered how UX seemingly highjacks 3's plot at points for no reason. 4 itself is predicated on the mobile game as well.

It's a mess, the series has a reputation for being convoluted, and it's story was spread out for so long that it's only natural its relevance would die.

3 got a lot of attention because it was Xehanort's finale, it had been asked about and waited for since fans finished their run of KH2 in the early 2000s.

It's sad to be sure but I honestly find it a miracle at all people talk about it now and then. I'm also kept somewhat up to date by what I see on here or twitter but I have no intention to bother with 4 myself.

There's just nothing there worth my attention. It's not relevant to me.

This lack of new Kingdom Hearts content or talk (like showing trailers or what have you) is honestly a mistake on Square Enix's part, I think.

A friend of mine, who's a casual KH fan (probably even more than a casual. He's played most of the games and kind of stays up to date with it through me) told me the other day that he missed when KH was relevant: obviously meaning that he doesn't think it is anymore. And can anyone really argue with that?

I know a lot of the super fans, who would be a part of the fandom rain or shine--whether there was content or not--are the least into it right now than they ever have been before, since there's literally nothing to keep us going.

And I'm aware that the plan has been for Missing Link to come out, and to tide us over with that (but things, sadly, keep getting in the way of that), but I still think putting so much on the shoulders of one single mobile game is questionable at best.

I also feel like they're counting on the momentum of KHIII to carry them forward, since it sold so well. But that was partly because some people were like, "Oh my gosh! That game that's allegedly been in development for thirteen years finally exists?! I'm going to check it out! Especially since I may or may not have played I and II when I was a kid." They're not going to have that same reaction with IV. A lot of people also really didn't like III (and thus might not give IV a chance for that reason), for some reason. And some who were big fans decided to quit after III, as it was the end of the Dark Seekers Chronicles and thus a good stopping point.

I feel like decisions they're making now are going to come back and hurt KHIV. But we'll see, I guess.

[hotgirlstiles]

hotgirlstiles fic recs!!

VERY SPECIFIC REC: u know those fics where its alive hale family and theyre all a little older and stiles has the BIIIIGGEST cutest crush on derek hale except he isnt close w derek but he IS close w the entire hale family who is practically in love w him?? well boy do i have TWO fics for you…

only by entering the wolf’s den and the key!! these are probably the cutest and greatest fics to ever live.. also more recs under the cut cause i have been collecting them like gold

everything, everywhere (every day) is a pack vacation fic and IM SOOOOO OBSESSED WITH THIS SHEESH. dereks ablittke annoying but fucking hell its SO worth it 😭😭 my mom was listening to the song true loudly from the other room and it started playing during the confession scene and desr god it felt like a fucking movie bro

everything, everywhere (every day) is a pack vacation fic and IM SOOOOO OBSESSED WITH THIS SHEESH. dereks ablittke annoying but fucking hell its SO worth it 😭😭 my mom was listening to the song true loudly from the other room and it started playing during the confession scene and desr god it felt like a fucking movie bro

keep it together <3 sorry couldnt resist not putting it here i feel like i’ll always include this in every fic rec i have 💗 it’s my most favorite supernatural creature stiles fic to exist 🫶🫶🧸

california is a series and it has two works and i swear to god bro it’s the hottest fucking fic i have ever read. it’s pure smut though so don’t get mad at me 😭 its genuinely so hot and is everything i like..

all the roads that led to you OF COURSE A SWEET SWEET WONDERFUL DEREK CHARACTERIZATION POST S2 FIC <33333 yall already KNOWWWW how fucking obsessed i am w post s2 fics where the characterizations are just fucking CHEFS KISS! this is so so good (my bookmarked lines: “if i lose you, too, i’m not surviving it this time.” / he wishes he could turn 18 and suddenly wash his hands under the sea the way macbeth yearned to.)

it’s pack research ok this is a littke pwp that focused more on the plot but its soooo cute 😭 stiles decides to read werewolf erotica and its sooo silly.. the pack makes fun of him though and the author wrote it rly well .. this is just so goofy i loooorv it 🥰

things thicker than water 🥺🥺 okay y’all already know how much i love me some whump stiles and this author is a fucking GOLDMINE for whump stiles ESPECIALLY stiles claudia relationship! their fics r my fucking fave honestly theyre always on the forefront of my mind.. this one is of my faves especially <3

words alone !!! another one of my fav nogitsune fics 🥺 just fucking obsessed with their relationship in this one and how derek handles the whole situation. just obsessed with derek

unstable OKAY I POSTED THIS ALREADY BUT I JUST HAD TO SAY IT AGAIN. this is one of my fav fucking fics holy shit. stiles is psychotic and its just. really good. i love how the author handles it and how it affects stiles’ relationships and i especially love how derek reacts to it. i just fucking love this whole fic i lovelovelove this derek characterization it’s everything to me🥺

love so hard, it could rip my throat out All right.. another post s2 fic.. sorry i’m a little obsessed with these type of fics abd by that i mean post s2 and sterek a little unhealthy and hiding from everyone and finding solace in each other and derek isnt some weird asshole macho asshole.. hes just in love with stiles.. dear lord!

let’s get lost. really really REALLY good fic! its. kinda canon divergence from s3a and it just deals with stiles issues from the darkness and again. very amazing derek characterization. what do yall expect from me 🤷‍♀️

first son, last chance THIS IS SOOOOO GOOD it’s way way intense and violent especially in the last parts but its SO good. yall know how much i love me some bodyguard derek sooo 🥰🥰😘

a bro’s guide to surviving an assassination attempt. ANOTHER BODYGUARD DEREK 🥰🥰🥰 this one was reallyyyyy really nice and goofy and cute! my bookmarked lines: i’m going to need you to be a big, brave boy for me now, okay? / god. you have hometown hero written all over you.

“… all Derek wants to do is lock him away in a safe place and then tear LA apart piece by piece until his claws are sunk in Kate’s throat. It’s revenge for his pack, yes, but there’s something else there, now. Something Stiles shaped.”

destiny sucks. this might be my last rec since its getting too long 😭 but sheesh. this one. just love derek in this one. its post s3a and stiles dealing w the darkness & his spark yet again but how derek deals w/ his anxiety attacks is just so 🥺once read this while listening to this love by taylor swift and sobbed violently

through time and space is really reallyyyyy cute 🥺 derek gets time traveled to the past (he’s from the future where theyre older n rogether) and sees teenager stiles and is just. ahhhh its so so sweet and endearing i love this so much

ok i lied. the taming of the wolf! canon divergence where derek lives in the burnt hale house nd stiles befriends him.. heehee<3 its all so sweet and cute. one scene always stays w me it’s derek fighting and screams at stiles to run and stiles actually does because he knows derek trusts him to do it and knows that derek wouldnt want him to get hurt 🥺 its a really nice difference from the usual stiles scenes when derek says that and it was really sweet to me.. like it makes sense to me..

OK LAST ONE I PROMMY. the beginner’s guide to everyday magic. Ok. stiles gets pushed out of the pack BUT IN A WAY THAT MAKES TOOOOTAL SENSE! yall know i wouldnt give yall a pushed out of pack that doesnt make any sense! this shit was toooo good! stiles moves to the countryside and its just SO good. really warm and good

OK LAST ONE AGAIN. all your problems are distractions. ok this doesnr focus on sterek much because it’s post s3a where scott is being his usual adorable self who just wants to help allison & stiles but it kinda goes crazy 🥺 allison and stiles’ genders are changed and it’s basically a story on how they handle it. i am not immune to a really good and cute stallison fic okay!

WAIT WAIT OKAY LAST ONE LEGIT! traces by siand!!!!! one of the few siand fics i like LOL this is a deleted fic.. its post nogitsune and im soooo fucking in love w this it’s basically everything i want and need in a Post nogutsune fic!! ALSO THE DEREK IN THIS ONE IS SOOO FUCKING GOOD YALLLL i wish siand would go back to writing derek like this uts sooo fucking good 😭 def recommend!

wait okay this one FUCK i almost forgot! but thunderstorms and police lullabies. THIS THE FUCKING ONE UALLLLL!!!! fix it fic for before boyd dies .. oh gid man. just a really good fic for stiles healing and a wonderful pack. its seriously one of the fics i always reread its so so soothing and healing. kinda wish the sciles was a little better but its honestly so worth it..

ok that’s all ❤️❤️❤️ enjoy the fics .. 💗

[cornus27florida]

Actually I know these list from few days ago but I determined to answer all - which make me need days to finish it hahaha. Here all of my answers, hope you guys that read it enjoys!!

✨Favorite kingdom:

is not Plaid not Pastel kingdom actually.. is Saffron's the Foliage kingdom! Like his royal garden is so amazing, and only from seeing the garden I already really want to live there and gazing the Flowers like what Saffron's dad (the Foliage king) love to do. Sign me up to be the kingdom citizen?

🐞Favorite Headcannon(s):

-> Dogyssey been read to sleeping Gwen, resulting to her making Frederick appear in her dream-scape and finally could have some closures to what happened

-> Frederick, all by himself, making the flower bouquet that he tried to gives to Gwen during her dinner party

-> Leelathea's lingering soul (that I feel trapped in the item that Leland stole) will protect her children, the same one that Frederick thought to be 'the haunting spirit' in Plaid palcace

-> CPC will not be so-secret anymore, the members being 'exposed' during their mission to saves the Pastel folks leads to CPC becomes a legit institution that becomes a safe place for people becomes their own defined 'better version' and allowing non-cursed people to join - starts w/ Frederick

-> Gwendolyn and Frederick decides to postponing their wedding for few years, in between the time-skip they're helping CPC to flourish while preparing their own wedding

💐I love Pastel siblings so much, but if needed to rating it (really sorry!) - it gonna be; 1. Jamie; 2. Maria; 3. Lorena

🌻Frederick or Gwendolyn?

Why not both? I am loving them so much as they're ended up together is the very thing that I want to see in CPC, and FredDolyn/GwenDerick is my ultimate OTP in the series.

I might have more tedency to Frederick thou as I related to him more than Gwen, and I am really sorry there Gwen .. I feel like I am defending Frederick more than you :< because the reason is that I feel Frederick the one that need the defense more in fandom eyes (like comment section and wikia).

🎫Favorite CPC original MUSIC (sound)tracks:

What he wants (could be seen as Frederick's theme imho)

👑Favorite CPC member: (although not initiated officially yet in the free pass CPC episode..) Whitney!! Simple reason : He such adorable white cat that have awkward zuko vibes ^^

ESPC WHEN WHITNEY COME BACK, CPC LITERALLY TREATED HIM LIKE A CAT LMAO - ahahaha poor Whitney

👍One thing that I like/love about the CPC fandom:

I am honestly a late comer to CPC fandom, from not reading it when it first launched or when in still canvas - and kinda silent till now 2023 - but all these nice interactions with awesome people in Tumblr, I am deeply appreciated. The friends that I found in the Discord (I started from the chil near-death CPC server named 'Cursed Princess Castle' and used to interacting with the owner SnowDaisy) but the most active CPC-themed discord that I joined at February 4th is :

I hope the CPC contents still going on and we're enjoying CPC final season with BANG and much enjoyments ^^

Thank you for CPC content you guys have

+ I almost forgot because I rarely browsing in REDDIT (it's banned in my country, and I need to using VPN to access it) but the sub-reddit of Cursed Princess Club is awesome - there's various topics including memes and analyeses - like there's someone that making neat CPC timeline as:

👎one thing you don't like about the fandom (specifically the comment section) : the over-stayed hate for Frederick

Seriously, why people keep hating (and it seems they won't forgive them no matter what) for Frederick to the point is most over-stayed imo? Like with all the stories plotline so far, Frederick learn to be the better version of himself (he now have real friends from CPC, enjoying people company, truly changed his own story as he breaking the prison) while at the same time he naturally fell in love with Gwendolyn (and it's truly a genuine one unlike what Leland planned, to have his sons faking affections to the Pastel Princesses). Frederick already tortured and even grovelling like what the hater wanted in this final season (espc episode 134, 142-145) - what those people want more to him to able forgive him?? For him to sacrifice everything that he remains left including his life??

This frustation even to the point of hopelessness (see SS), but fortunately @meritre24601 share me the reddit link of nice and objective points to defending Frederick :

^ this person just replying after days, and I am pretty sure the one that disliking my comment (I am "Ants Amaa) is them - I feel relating the fictional condition (CPC) with real world is okay [like it fun to kinning character], but don't mix it up too deeply especially to the statement "they apologized-but I am still won't forgive them" is such toxic thought.. Like if the apology insincere I'll agree with it, but Frederick is sincere.

He (Frederick) never intended for her (Gwen) to hear, and he said it out loud because Blaine didn't want to understand him: -> The Reddit thread there give me the positivity I need, mostly agreeing to the writer (although few didn't - and kind of facepalming moment as they're the same person that feel to not want read everything as they thought it's too long)

🎃What CPC episode at when I started reading it?

I am honestly a 'late-comer' by knowing the existence of CPC after the creator of Gourmet Hound, Leehama, posting an IG story about the CPC webtoon. First time reading I am kinda put off with the art visual (like, really sorry there Gwen.. I thought the in-universe saying that you are indeed creepy looking is.. true) and kinda bewildered with all the hates that Frederick get - as I feel some things said in the comment section are too overboard (probably because I am not come from the canvas, and I am more relate to Frederick the deuteragonist more than Gwendolyn the protagonist). I am staying though to keep reading CPC (one thing for sure, I am reading from the very first episode but the arc that I mostly feel at heart is 'Potrait Showdown' arc = episode 62 to 77'-because I remember to using coins to open episodes such as Realization and Avenge me! and the Winner), and with following free coins event I am saving -> use it to open the FP episode that likely have Frederick in it, let it immerse and !!

I am so amazed with CPC story, and the art of it I realized not bad - it better to said it improved - Hence since the 'Potrait Showdown' arc where I deeply fell in love with CPC webtoon

I feel really late (and I kinda lack of EQ when figured later my mental health) to only really feels deep to CPC story during the Potrait Showdown arc - the deep talk between Whitney and Frederick is the one that somehow most relatable to me - the plot point that make me dive deep into CPC fandom

👁️ Blaine or Beckett?

Err neither? I am truly sorry.. It roots from the thought that Maria not to be ready to have romance presently (I want her archive her dream to have recital in the Pastel Plaza at spring first), and I feel both Blaine and Beckett have their own pro and cons - like Blaine is suffering from his perfectionism complex and likely been brainwashed by Leland in the current time to become his 'ace' (as, he's broken now) & Beckett is still mistooking Maria to Gwen (his first thought is the princess that he keep counselling off is a shallow pig)

🏰Most favorite 'love-rival':

Lord Leopold of the Argyle kingdom (not Suzie or Beckett) !!

Never seen such a good-written 'love rival' that giving sound advice to both sides of the ship; Frederick truly taken his advice by keeping forward in CPC intruder arc; now it's time for Gwen to remember to allow (and believing) the loves from other to her, "no one ever loves her" is such FALSE statement

😗Favorite side character:

The witch! Damn since her first appearance she's so chill and funny - and all her appearances leads to comedy aspect instead we got terrified. She even helps indirectly by telling Jamie how to awakes Gwen during episode [Poisoned]. I feel we might see the witch again, if not for explaining how Gwen finally awakes - I feel her knowledge about curses will be immensely helpful in the future to CPC - like by learning about their curses that could help them to find the cures.

📝CPC character that I want to see more of them in fanfic:

Give me more Jolie-centric fanfic please pretty please, she such an adorable cutie character that expressing much expression and joys even by cursed without having eyes

🎨CPC character that I want to see more of them in fanart:

Frederick! I want to see more artist suffers drawing him as he has such unique 'bizarre' hairs - permanent cowlick that looks like a broom that dried in weird way (CPC own words LOL)

🧀 Favorite fanart:

Hands down the best CPC fanart IMHO, featuring my OTP and even thou the title said gala - I totally could see it becomes their wedding outfit. Gwendolyn looks so lovely there wearing green pastel like a Disney princess and Frederick ? I am literally could melts there, his face expression so soft and warm, his outfit so damn gorgeous - upgrade from his trademark green Plaid jacket.

I really love this fanart with all of my heart <3

🍪 Favorite fanfic

Currently, my personal favorite is Aqua's fic Cow X Possum !

🥞CPC character(s) that I want (more like, wish) to have more development in the story:

It's wrong to want 2 people at once, which are Whitney and Prez Calpernia? I really want them to resolve all of their issues and getting together - Whitney has huge crush to Prez, and I feel Prez' Fortune but Thermidora could refer to current Whitney - with the four kids are 4 CPC members (Abbi, Monika, Saffron, and Syrah probably? Or changes SyRon with Nell and Jolie or Aurelia and Renee?). I am also WhitPelnia shipper, and if the story could expand with them having more character development I am really up to it ><

but I agreed with all of the content in this post, I am also okay with WhitPelnia isn't a defined canon at the end of the story

🐑 Opinion on the Laverne : -> negative-tend Neutral

People said that Laverne is the creator LambCat's self-inside, and mostly awed by her and calling her such a queen. But if I am being honest, I find her such an annoying pampered pet and sometimes I have hard time seeing her other than being such a spoiled overweight Llama - with her horny crushes kinda grated my nerves and her indifferent when Isolde crying beside her? (I won't call her 'rubenesque dog' like Leopold but still I am kinda disliking Laverne). But sometimes I agreed that she's such a floofly classy female llama that gives some positive nudges in the CPC plot story - like ;

(1) Isolde comment in the past somewhat giving people the wariness that Laverne is Jack's subtitute for Leland.

(2) All the times when Frederick carrying Laverne to reaches Gwendolyn is subtlely giving him trainings that make him so strong and fast - and between them enabling Frederick to interact with CPC members (like-Monika and Whitney) which make Frederick gaining friends in such unique ways.

(3) Laverne fancying (or it's safe to said have horny crush?) to Whitney is such powerful plot points - by first making the proof that Whitney is indeed a changed person to be better (in CPC intruder arc) and pulling out Frederick from the prison cell so he could escape and becomes the hero.

🎶Song that I associated with CPC -> I choose one, because I want to write about it's beautiful lyric that fits CPC. Enjoys all the 3 official-original versions of the song btw!

No one never made me feel as small as you did No one made me feel as cursed I'd lie awake in bed just staring at the ceiling Wondering if things would get worst

I was trapped under your thumb Believing when you called it love

But I will forgive myself and start to let it go Accept that who you chose to be was out of my control And though it might be hard to begin again I'll write myself a brand new story with a happy end

I survived, so tonight I am taking back my lifeAnd I'll show you that I am not nothing

I kept my head above the water 'til the moment When all the elements aligned And I could fly away to heal my broken spirit And leave my demons far behind

You always said that I was weak But the bravest thing I did was leave

So I will forgive myself and start to let it go Accept that who you chose to be was out of my control And though it might be hard to begin again I'll write myself a brand new story with a happy end

I survived, so tonight I am taking back my life And I'll show you that I am not nothing

Looking up at the sky I think I see the start of a sunrise

And I will forgive myself and start to let it go Accept that who you chose to be was out of my control And though it might be hard to begin again I'll write myself a brand new story with a happy end

I survived, so tonight I am taking back my life And I'll show you that I am not nothing I'll show you that I am not nothing

Look at the lyric of the song, especially the sentences that I bold-ed - it's so fitting to many CPC characters at once

No one made me feel as cursed -> All CPC members experienced this, and it extended to others too like: Frederick, Gwendolyn, Leelathae/Lilyth, Isolde, the Princels

though it might be hard to begin again I'll write myself a brand new story with a happy end -> One of the best quote in CPC imho is from Whitney's "You choose the time to heal and change your story", it's indeed so hard to begin, but anyone able to change own story to be happy

I was trapped under your thumb Believing when you called it love -> fits Isolde so much, been gaslighting all these time by Leland and feeling so trapped

You always said that I was weak But the bravest thing I did was leave -> It fits with episode 145 "Prison Break" so much, all the time Frederick been called the weak one so he have severe inferiority complex, but when he decides to changes his own story - leaving the Plaid Palace by escaping his prison cell - It's really a brave action!

I will forgive myself and start to let it go -> this really fits Prez so much, with revealation that she didn't kill anyone and she didn't need to acting strong 100% all the time - she could letting things go and forgive herself about what she did

Accept that who you chose to be was out of my control -> Jack the Pastel king to Leland the Plaid king there

I survived, so tonight I am taking back my life And I'll show you that I am not nothing I'll show you that I am not nothing -> When CPC+Frederick+ Gwendolyn finally winning againts the Plaid troop that Leland leads, these lyric sentence fitting so much for them to exclaim (especially to Leland that thinks cursed people has no value) "We'll show the world that we aren't nothing!"

🌠Underrated background character:

This CPC member, the not-named-yet princess that has OP curse 'inevitably causing all men in the earshot to be filled with anguish' - like just give her a megaphone then she could single-handle-ly making the plaid troop that mostly consist of males to weeping and abandon Leland's evil plan

🗡️Best character design in the CPC: CPC Prez, Calpernia !

I really loves her 'princess charming' outfit so much, making black dress still have princess elegancy while her black pant for ultimate utility being her so atletic. She's such beautiful charismatic character with such complimentary color contrast in her character design that I really love so much

The twitter caption is so true, indeed the very best design ^^

🌆 Favorite panel:

I have so many panels that I like - but my most favorite one :

The Plaid Princes and Pastel Princesses happily together and smiling beautifully (especially Frederick there, boi expression so soft looking at Gwen - his angel) - they're so beautiful T^T

🌵CPC fun fact:

Heard from LambCat's Patreon AMA that told about the story plot point of Frederick confession to Gwen actually intended to happened be much later, like at near the end of the story but it changes to happen earlier! As the shipper of FredDolyn/GwenDerick, I am so welcoming this fun fact!

-> Explore relationship of self-love with romantic love : feels like the green flag of the ship FredDolyn/GwenDerick could be swings free-ly there guys! The ship sailing earlier ^^

💵Something that CPC fans will like:

If it referring to a webtoon, I will suggesting Gourmet Hound!!

Both are heartwarming webtoon with tantalizing foods inside - both teaches how to heals mentally, as in CPC it about self-love against the world's perspective while in Gourmet Hound is about to moves on from loved one being passed away. The MC, Lucy Fuji deep down never prioritize herself like Gwen.. and the love interest, Gramps/Graham is snarky male that used to believe things that become bad (his friends scattered when the restaurant he worked, Dimanche, falling apart) solely because his fault - which similar to what Frederick experiences, thinking all the bad things happened as his fault. Also even the MCs, Lucy and Graham - becomes cameo in CPC during the gala in the episode 121!

Lucy and Graham the one that behind Lance and Lorena!!

🎪Favorite arc: hands down Gwen dinner party!

I feel that arc is so balancing perfect as have everything I like

🎬CPC AU you like:

I don't have specifics, but if the fanworks could make me have GwenDerick/FredDolyn happily I dig it. Hmm there's kinda old discontinued fic with Your Name (Kimi no Nawa) AU that I feel have much potential of the author want to continue it. The premise is, Gwen and Frederick mysteriously switched their soul each night when they sleep so when they wake up they swamped place - it makes Frederick surprised to be 'a princess' with the face that he thought cursed while Gwen living as Frederick in the military school and Plaid palace ~ this resulting to the world lives around them changes. So, technically it's a fanfic - but I feel it different point' than the previous favorite fanfic before -> here the fic link, please give it a read and wishing it could be continued!

G-w-e-n-d-o-l-y-n = 9 letters

F-r-e-d-e-r-i-c-k = 9 letters as well

Cursed Princess Club but Your Name (AU). Takes place a year or two before Gwen and Frederick's engagement. One day, Princess Gwendolyn and Prince Frederick start periodically swapping bodies. The two experience a lot of new things. But it doesn't matter. They'll just forget. (lowkey I'm a little too proud of the fic name hehe get it because both of their names have nine letters I will legit never shut up about this) -> writer own word summary, so funny ^^

🤡Who I think will die from Nell's premonition:

It's already kinda long plot point already.. but I think with how many incident that Gwen caught up, she is the one.. But that thought easily discarded by keep saying "She's the main character, why she need to be killed?? GWEN WON'T DIE OKAY - AS I REFUSED IT TO HAPPEN!!!"

Never expect it actually refer to Renee TBH, and very relieved to know the death premonition turns out to not referring to a person but 'toxicity of thoughts' in CPC. Pheeew..

🌧️Your biggest CPC flex:

hmm, I think when I identifying and listing the floriography of the flower bouquet that Frederick gives to Gwen before the dinner party. I am enjoying all the times when experienced doing so, while making romantic HC that Frederick the one that making the bouquet himself

+ also I want to flex my Tumblr post that compiling things about curses and cures in CPC as the following;

🎸Favorite fan theory: -> it never left my head, so I make it

Frederick will attempting to sacrifice himself to asking the Omniscient Clam (that actually a cursed artifact) about how to awakes Gwen -> but the very same moment he gonna do it, Gwen will awakes by herself and stop him + Lilyth's soul is trapped in the item that Leland stole and later on she will protects her children from the Plaid troop army

^ this image make me theorizing that the Omniscient Clam is actually a cursed artifact, that in exchange for the knowledge it bestow after being asked - it will suck out the life force of the asker - which seems the limitation of the asker is being green eyed person. I feel this sinister info of the Clam is hidden in the remaining part of Lilyth's diary that Aurelia hasn't read, and as Lilyth is the only confirmed person that asking the clam-having green grey eyes-and passed away due to some mysterious cause.. I feel her death and being the asker of the Clam is deeply related, and the Clam is ready for it's next victim - Frederick - with the color that it loves for.

I theorized that in this final season we have ultimate Frederick's development from used to being selfish thinking "I can't give you anything you need" to being selfless at the final season with "I will offer my whole life to save you" -> as he'll ask the Clam (forced by Leland, that thinks finally his 'worthless' son now has value to becomes a sacrificial lamb), knowingly it will suck his life force like Lilyth - as he becomes self-less (doing so to saves Gwen so she'll awakes, and protecting people around her espc CPC that been exposed by Plaid troop) and thought that he better not exist in Gwen's life

-> like the panel in episode 145, Frederick thought could likely be "I am the worst, so if I am leaving Gwen's life in order to saves her and people that she cares about (CPC+Pastel folks) then it will be okay to accept this devil bargain" - never thinks that he also integral part of Gwen's life and shouldn't be gone

🔨 Favorite quote: from Whitney (mentioned in ep 69 & 145),

"Pain is not a competition. The painful emotions you feel are valid but you do get to choose when you're ready to heal from them and change your story."

🍰Favorite food from CPC:

I really want to try the remake version of shopiscated take of Gwen's Apple pie at the dinner party to becomes real

🎲Character you (most) related to?

Frederick, the tiniest prince, from Plaid kingdom ~

I am somehow feels out of all characters in CPC, the most related to me in experiences is him. I am a female and my Family isn't competitive abusive like him - but things he felt like shutting down everyone (like bottling things up, afraid to communicate it)- constantly escape to fictional world - the bully leaves nothing but scars that difficult to be heals.... I am currently trying to change my own story', just like him at the episode (Prison Break)-I wish the best for us doing it ><

Frederick suffers from feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy (inferiority complex). He doesn’t think very highly of himself, and feels that there is so much he simply just cannot achieve. He looks down on himself constantly, even to the point where it can seem like self pity

-> which dangerous if just accepting 'the pain feelings are valid' without trying to be brave enough to make changes

+ Also I am loving books so much, especially fictional ones that has nice drawings - like I have collection of Hans Cristian Andersen Original Tales with beautiful illustration in there.

🕵️‍♀️Unpopular opinion:

I still kinda want all Plaid Princes will marrying with their bethroted Pastel Princesses even after all these time including the recent reveal that Blaine and Lance might be in act/faking affection to Maria and Lorena. Am I wrong to still ship them? even thought it likely out of the Pastel and Plaid - only Frederick and Gwendolyn that likely ended up marrying each other?? Leaving Blaine won't be together with Maria, when their relationship looks like the first real best friendship between them. Also for Lorena, does she able to forgives Lance ? I am confused seriously, like in the analogy is I am (feeling alone) in the 2 crashing ships (Blaine/Maria and Lance/Lorena) that likely will sink - other people already jumped ship to others while I am here holding on still hoping of the ships could magically fix itself 😥Like the official art piece of them that I seen in the Wikia and twitter are lovely :

For thoughts while sipping tea, while crying as Blaine and Lance likely going through 'villain arc' in Leland's plan arc.. ;-;

🕷️CPC confession:

I made a growing google document in the following link

that contains everything about CPC that I compile and I like to share (like HCs that i may develop as fanfics and the long reaction of episode - but I mostly afraid to share it due to it may spoiling people (there's fastpass episodes content become the element) while at the same time I am afraid the Canon points will changes as it make things I write to be irrelevant .. IDK what to do + I feel really like a loud unstoppable Chipper Bird in discord.. Really sorry it's my phase but doing so I hope everyone could enternained - and like could survived the hiatus of these 3 weeks. I hope that people didn't find me annoyingly chirper... Aameen

cursed princess club ask game ^^

reblog to make your followers send you these some of these questions!

✨ = what's your favorite kingdom?

🐞 = favorite headcanon?

💐 = lorena, maria, or jamie?

🌻 = gwendolyn or frederick?

📼 = favorite original music from cpc?

👑 = favorite member of the club?

👎 = one thing you don't like about the fandom (specifically the comment section)

👍 = one thing you do like about the fandom

🎃 = what episode was cpc at when you started reading it?

👁 = blaine or beckett?

🏰 = favorite "love rival"? (leo, suzie, beckett)

😶‍🌫️ = favorite side character?

📝 = cpc character you want to see more fics about

🎨 = cpc character you want to see more fanart of

🧀 = favorite fanart?

🍪 = favorite fic?

🥞 = cpc character you want to have more development on in the series

🐑 = opinion on laverne?

🎶.= songs you associate with cpc?

🌠 = underrated background character

🗡 = favorite character design?

🌆 = favorite panel?

🌵 = cpc fun fact!

💵 = recommend something you think cpc fans would like

🎪 = favorite arc?

🎬 = cpc AUs you like!

🤡 = who did you think would die from nell's premonition?

🌧 = your biggest cpc flex

🎸 = favorite fan theory?

🔨 = favorite quote?

🍰 = favorite food from cpc?

🎲 = character you related to?

🕵 = unpopular opinion?

🕷 = cpc confessions?