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wroteclassicaly · 4 months ago

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Daddy Steve

(Steve Harrington x Female Reader)

Summary: Steve finds out you’re pregnant.

Warnings: Language, hurt/comfort, best-friends to lovers, Daddy!Steve, mentions loss of virginity, alludes to smut, nausea, throwing up, and pregnancy stuff.

Pairings: Steve Harrington x Female Reader

A/N: Ever since that Daddy Steve comment in season three, my brain can’t get a breeding kink addicted Steve outta my filthy ass head! And thus, I bring you more trash that you didn’t ask for, lol!! I might do a part two with smut?? Enjoy! - Kristen <3

“C’mon, you love this stuff, honey,” Steve mumbles around a mouthful of buttery popcorn.

You’re smashed between him and your shared best-friend, Robin Buckley—on the sofa, watching some newly released horror film that went straight to video, and right into Steve’s VCR. You have to fight everything inside of you not to gag on the smell of popped kernels, urges to inhale, an automatic reflex that only serves to make your predicament worse. Robin wrinkles her nose in distaste, reaching across you and shoving his wrist away.

“Because having greasy ass butter on your chin is really encouraging her to try it out, Harrington.”

“Mhm,” You say, a half whimper slipping out. Your stomach rolls, making you automatically grip onto your baggy denim over shirt, the small swelling of your tummy a comfort.

Fuck the morning sickness… when did this start happening?

Robin’s eyes glance at you with a pitying worry, raising a brow in silent communication. You shake your head, giving her an ‘I’m fine’ signal, dodging Steve’s last classic film snack advance. When you catch sight of his tongue working to clean off his mouth’s corner, that ache teeters between your thighs, a rush of words tumbling off your lips.

“I have to go pee.” You scramble from the couch, nearly tripping over worn converse in the process.

And, as it turns out, your excuse is an even more idiotic thing to say. Steve’s voice halts you in your footfalls.

“Again? That’s like, the fifth time in an hour. And unless you’re chugging from some secret flask, I haven’t seen you drink much of anything, either.”

“I…”

“Dude, do not ever question a woman again about her bathroom habits, okay?” Robin interjects, giving him the Robin look.

“If she’s on her period she can just tell us that. You think I give a crap? We’re all friends here.” Steve shrugs a shoulder, tossing the empty popcorn bag down and ducking his salty fingers into his mouth with a delectable ‘pop’.

You’re momentarily lost within the realm of your raging hormones. Your doctor had told you to expect fluctuating moods, surprising shifts in your appetite; sexually, emotionally, physically, and nutrition wise. That explains why you’re always stealing Dustin’s sour candy and eating spoonfuls of peanut butter at 3:00 AM, crying at reruns of Cheers, and currently ogling your best-friend like he’s always been yours, and isn’t currently pining for someone else. Steve isn’t yours, despite what he’s put inside of you after one needy night together. His dark irises suddenly find you gawking, leaving him confused.

The way his nose is shaped, his jawline structure, that delicious neck he permitted you to mark at one point, that gorgeously soft hair you spent all night pulling, to that sinfully beautiful mouth—you’re speechless and very overwhelmed.

I need him…

He starts to move, but you hold up a hand. That would be sensory overload. “I should definitely go home after. I’ve got an early shift at the store tomorrow.” You lie.

“After what? Peeing?” Steve laughs.

Another ever changing hormone snaps your irritation, causing you to roll your eyes, desire lightly dissipating. “Obviously. That cool with you, King Harrington? Or do you need to further bore me with your pathetic excuse for a movie pick?”

Robin starts to edge back from Steve, his own anger at your snapping at him seeping through, coming off him in dangerous waves.

“Okay, what is with this goddamned attitude? We always watch bullshit movies and you’ve never complained about it before!”

“Mr. Former Prom King isn’t keen on attitudes now? Sounds like a problem that’s not mine.” You push, unable to stop yourself. After all, it’s better than feeling like garbage listening to him go on and on about Nancy, not even knowing he took your virginity and got you pregnant in one go.

If Steve could tuck his eyebrows into his hairline then they’d be there. His hands pinch his hips, lips pursed as he’s clenching his teeth.

“You know what, you should leave. Between your bitching, constant bathroom breaks, and acting too stuck up to watch a movie and eat some popcorn with your friends, you’re not much fun to be around anyways.”

“Steve!” Robin scolds.

“What? Princess is allowed to act like she’s too good to hang out lately and we can’t be upset about it?” Steve motions to you with a tipped hand.

There’s a burning brimming your eyes before you can stop it. You’d prefer the anger. Steve’s hands tighten at his sides, jaw twitching, a biting question, battling his urges to comfort you and apologize for upsetting you. “Why are you even crying right now?”

“Let’s all just calm down and breathe, okay?” Robin stands now, tiptoeing to meet in the middle of you.

“I was calm. I think you need to talk to her about all this. As a matter of fact, call her tomorrow after I call her a cab and she leaves, because I know she’s not working in the morning, and she just lied to our faces.” Steve adds.

Your face flushes, stomach tightening. That sickness is overpowering you, taking control. You can’t stop that watering in your eyes, blurring your vision, making your two best-friends blobs in the distance. They start arguing back and forth, Steve’s evident confusion at Robin defending your behavior, and Robin pleading with him to give you a break. You don’t say anything, but turn on your heel and make the walk down the hallway, barricading yourself in the bathroom and taking care of your pressing bladder, head in your hands as you silently cry.

Being a simple band geek that harbored a crush on Steve for years, turning into his best-friend too when you and Robin began working at the mall with him, to leaning on each other when Starcourt fell into shambles and monsters became very real to you, finalizing one shared night three months ago—it all happened so fast. Steve never said anything more after, just thanked you for being there for him and checked in on you with phone calls and a work chat. You couldn’t bear staying with him that night, either, so you had left, leaving your virginity and your scent behind on Steve’s sheets. You wanted to, you needed him as much as he had to have you, but you weren’t sure how to feel about it, and Robin had picked it up right away—scolding you, before asking how it was and if you were alright. She’s been there for you through it all, and you’re double on the guilt at dragging her into this mess.

“Honey?” A heavy rasping of knuckles and a deep voice, a softer tone is sighing out on the other side.

You imagine him in that Steve Harrington lean, his ankle crossed over the other, palm on the framework, posture leaning into the doorway. Heaving out a breath you shouldn’t have held, you finish and wash your hands, throat constricting around a painful gulp as you unlatch the lock and pull open the door.

You’re right.

His lips making that familiar motion, dark eyes saddened, worried, guilt ridden. You don’t even let him speak, locking your arms around his striped clad waist, arms sliding down, wrists brushing his leather belt. You inhale his laundry detergent, cologne spritzed scent, sniffling your apologies in quiet words. He lets you go on, pulling away a minute later to grip your shoulders, squeezing. “If you are on your period… or you’re upset about something, or I pissed you off, will you please talk to me?”

Your heartbeat gallops full speed ahead, thrumming sporadically against your throat. “I’m not on my period, Steve.” The words feel dry, your lips too chapped to even speak.

“Then what is it, and why can you tell Robin but not me?” He sounds hurt. Really hurt.

You find yourself at a loss, tongue stumbling to scrape up scraps of words. Nothing comes.

“She hasn’t told me shit, but I know that she knows what’s going on?”

You escape his words, chickening out. “My cab ride will probably be here soon, I better go.”

“I never called a cab.” Steve crosses his arms over his chest now. “And I wasn’t going to, you just pissed me off.”

“Yeah, well… ditto.” You snark, not meaning to.

“Okay, care to share why? Because I do everything I can to make sure you’re safe and you’re smiling. It makes me feel like shit when you feel like shit.”

Every scenario you imagined telling Steve about carrying his baby in, you never thought it would be him hovering over your blubbering, nauseated, hot mess form. But as you look into those eyes of his—glittering with undiluted concern, pulse vibrating off your lungs, ping ponging off your jugular, the words come on their own.

“I’m pregnant.”

That very popular symptom of sickness overtakes you, having you abandoning Steve in the doorway with your confession, your knees hitting the floor, head over the toilet bowl as it all comes out. And you sob. Over exerted from physical exhaustion, mentally tired over a guilty conscious, and ready to go to sleep—you pathetically cling to the Harrington’s guest toilet, panting, mouth wet, trembling hand reaching for your hair, only to be swept away. When you look up your heart takes a painful blow, stuttering in your chest. Steve’s eyes are watering, teeth gnawing on his lower lip.

He looks wounded, defeated. Like you kicked him into a gutter and left him there. Alone.

Still, he helps you lean back, stretching his long arm to flush the toilet and reach for a decorative hand towel, using the bathtub faucet behind him to wet it and press it along your forehead, edging down your neck, finally cleaning your mouth. He’s so gentle, so delicate in his touches, aside from his own emotions. You grip his wrist, seeing the dried tears matting his gorgeous lashes, holding his hand in yours. “I’m sorry.”

“How long have you known?” Is all he can croak, voice shaky and damp. He settles back against the wall, you following suit, still holding his hand in yours.

“Two months.”

“We had sex three months ago.” He reminds you, as if maybe he’s unsure how to approach it.

He remembers?

“I found out when I was already four weeks. Besides, it can’t be anyone else’s when I’ve only slept with you.”

“But we were just together for one night.” He looks confused, scrubbing a hand over his face, sniffing.

“Yeah, Steve, we were.” You hope to god that he gets the message without you having to say it.

It takes him moments, which feel like eternity. And then you are very aware of his pointed stare. “Are you telling me I’ve been the only guy to ever take you to bed?”

“Looks like it. Congrats.” You mutter, lifting your knees, an indulging stance your little swollen bump won’t let you complete. You grab over it, an instinctive reaction. Steve’s directing a watchful eye over your bulky denim, swallowing, his words coming out meek, gently. “Can I see?”

You look like a deer caught in headlights, moving to drop his hand, but he holds on, fingertips drawing circles over the back of your palm. “It’s okay.”

It relaxes you enough to agree, using your right hand to lift the denim, your simple lavender top stretched over the small swell that’s nestled at your navel, expanding towards your hips. You feel Steve move your joined hands over the fabric, scraping, scratching, dipping down underneath the bottom, hovering. “It won’t hurt it if I feel, right?”

This makes you laugh softly, shaking your head. “You didn’t pay attention in health class at all, did you?” At his exasperated dumbfounded look, you continue. “S’ okay, Steve. Just please don’t push on anything, because I can’t promise you the front of your shirt won’t look like the Exorcist after.”

“That bad, huh?” He questions, sincerity dripping through his words.

“You have no idea.” You help him raise your tee beneath your breasts, that cute and developing bump in all its glory. Your skin, already getting a couple more stretch marks, shines in the low light of the bathroom, your breathing and Steve’s all that is audible.

Times like this you wish you had your Polaroid to take his absolutely fascinated stare in. His big hand closes over it, pressing feather light, his watch showing 10:01 PM. It feels so damned good to have him know, to have someone touching you like this. And oddly… it’s as if this is how it should always be.

Steve is on the precipice of unknown, a possessive derailment wiggling its way into his normally calm exterior. His baby. Parts of him that fused with parts of you, growing an entire human being. And the sheer fact that you’re swollen with his child? He has to fight every way that pummels a fire into the pit of his stomach.

“I took your virginity when we made this?” He is marveling.

You clear your throat, embarrassed. “You did.”

He sniffles once more, then he’s palming circles across your stomach, before respectfully tugging your shirt down and adjusting it. He makes a move to halt you from shaking the denim back down. “You don’t have to hide it anymore. Please, don’t.”

You give a watery look of incredulous admiration, grateful he’s still the Steve Harrington you have come to know.

And love…

But he doesn’t have to be privy to that part.

“They said I should be able to hear its heartbeat next week.” A lightened load off your chest has you audibly relaxing against Steve’s shoulder—unintentional, but natural—his arm resting around your shoulders, kneading out mounts of week long tension.

“How big is it? I mean… can they tell?” His fascinating questionnaires have you giddy.

Ever the inquiring man.

You move your neck from side to side, attempting to fixate on the knots, trying to get some squeeze off your muscles. Steve takes notice immediately, his fingers tucking beneath your shirt collar, pinching your flesh and rolling it under his easy grip. “Don’t worry, I got you. How’s that?”

“Mhm, s’ good, Stevie.” His nickname tumbles free, making him squeeze you affectionately. “A plum, by the way.”

He does rear back this time, bewildered, a ‘huh’ pressed into the line between his brows.

You laugh, his ministrations on your neck’s nape continuing. “The baby. It’s the size of a plum, is the way they described it to me. Or whatever I wanna think of that is that size.”

“Can I come?” When you frown, he’s quick to continue, his voice a raspy whisper, still tear-dampened. “To the appointment, I mean.”

You won’t deny how your heart is racing, how his wanting to be involved is both scary and welcomed, but you’re also on the defense, walls up. You can only imagine what his parents will think, what everyone will think. And Nancy… You don’t want to ruin anyone’s future from one one sided night of meaningless sex.

Steve can see the wheels turning in your head, your muscles tensing beneath his touch. It’s a bit frightening.

“Honey—“

“I didn’t need anyone’s permission in deciding to have or keep this baby, Steve. I don’t expect any help, I don’t want any pity support. I’ll be fine on my own.”

The familiarity of descending guilt slaps you in the face, Steve’s shocked look peppering his features. “You think I don’t want to help with my own baby? You think I’m that much of a fucking douchebag?!” He stands now, hands on his hips in that stern way.

You too attempt to stand, gripping the empty towel rack to keep steady. “I didn’t know if that’s what you’d want, Steve. We’re both still so young. It’s my body, so the decision to carry our child was up to me. If I wasn’t going to, I still would’ve told you. As for helping? Like I said, we’re both young and you’re attached… elsewhere.” You try, carefully avoiding her name. “S’ not like I was excited to be the Midwest mom that traps the former heartthrob.”

“Then that would make me the Midwest dad that should’ve worn a condom and taken care of you more. If we’re sharing blame here, let’s even it out.”

You’re very aware he meant something else, but it brings you right back to being beneath him, your legs wide open, thighs trembling, hands holding purchase, unsure, going with him, letting Steve lead. That burning loss of feeling Steve Harrington between your thighs is enough to cause you to squeeze your legs, drawing his attention. And whatever this fresh feeling is, he seems to be feeling it too.

Steve lets his arm shift, fingers combing your hair back behind your ear. “You thinkin’ about it?”

You’re pitifully admitting, hands cupping his back as you slink into his embrace. It’s warm, it’s safe, it’s Steve Harrington. There will be a time for talking, but now isn’t it, now is soaking each other in, being together, with your baby boy or girl.

“I’m thinking a lot of things.” Is your answer, but it’s enough for him to remember how you felt that night, the way you gave yourself to him and stayed right there with him.

There’s a soft air around you both, seemingly helping ward off your aching insides, letting the nausea vanish. Your hand wraps itself over the swell, Steve watching in admiration, hand lowering onto your own. It’s back and forth grins, and you’re pulling away as you remember Robin is still in the living room. Stepping forward and out of Steve’s too warm for your hormones to handle embrace, you turn on the bathroom faucet to wash your hands and cup some water into them, drinking and swishing the nasty taste out. Steve doesn’t take his eyes off you, even as you both find your shared best-friend in living room, brow raised in concern and amusement.

Your bump is on full display and she is shaking her short mane, eyeing Steve’s doe eyed gaze, the color on his cheeks. “Aww, congrats, Daddy Dingus.”

You burst into laughter, full on.

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miloformula123fan · 3 months ago

Note

Hey! Could you do fic about Fernando Alonso x baker!reader from prompt? Tag me later! Thanks

of course darling. im so sorry it took me this long to get it out for you <3

Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.

also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better

and if you want to be added to my taglist lmk :)

and my masterlist is here <3

fernando alonso x baker!reader

“Hola, welcome to pan y amor, what can i get for you?”

“Your number?”

“I’m sorry?”

“Oh are you taken, my apologies. ”

“...no I’m not taken, just wasn’t expecting you to be so bold. How about you buy something and if you like it you can have my number and take me on a date?”

“I am not usually this bold, I apologise. Okay then, what would you recommend, mi sol?”

“Well, I mean, I have to recommend our natillas de leche, unless your allergic to something in them, then I’d try and think of something else.”

“Not allergic, though if my trainer heard how many of these I was eating.”

“Trainer huh?” as Y/N passed over the natillas. “so , you’re an athlete?”

“F1 driver, Fernando Alonso” he held over his hand to shake, after paying “i’m from here, so I like to come in and spend time with the locals”

“Oh, well I’m not the biggest f1 fan, but I’m sure happy to help the locals, maybe you could introduce me to F1.”

---

“Darling, I’m trying to make some brownies before the bakery opens, you cannot come in here and distract me.”

“Can I make something to help?”

“Do you swear that you will follow my instructions to a T?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Okay, you can make some caramel slices. You need to grab almond meal, vanilla protein powder, rice malt syrup, coconut oil, peanut butter, and dark chocolate, did you understand that?”

“Yes chef!”

“Okay good. It needs to go in the fridge, and then you can work on the strawberry lemon scones and then when i'm working on the tiramisu you can work on the orange loaf.”

“You’re telling me that when i rock up before my girlfriend officially starts work to hang out with her, all that happens if I have to do unpaid work.”

“Well i can’t pay you a f1 driver wage, because i can’t afford it and also you are not an f1 driver equivalent baker. I don’t even know if it’s worth giving you these ingredients for fear that I cannot sell what you make.”

---

“Okay, welcome back to pan y amor, as you know we in Cogollo, are massive f1 fans, so we have made some pumpkin cream cheese muffins to celebrate Fernando’s 33rd win. We had a little birdy tell us that this was his favourite flavour, so here’s how we make it, as always the full recipe will be on our blog y si quieres ver esta receta en español, ve a nuestro perfil, donde repasamos exactamente la misma receta, pero en español, para que todos nuestros fans de habla hispana también puedan seguirla. We’ve started this recipe by preheating the oven to 175 degrees celsius, which is 350 degrees fahrenheit for our American fans.

And as my boyfriend gets in the way, the pumpkin cream cheese muffins are gonna be made slower. He loves this flavour so he’d better get out of my way so I can make the muffins, si, comprendo?”

“Comprendo, capitan!”

Bien, bienvenido de nuevo a pan y amor, como ya sabéis, en Cogollo somos grandes fans de la F1, así que hemos preparado unas magdalenas de calabaza y queso crema para celebrar la victoria número 33 de Fernando. Un pajarito nos dijo que este era su sabor favorito, así que así es como lo preparamos, como siempre la receta completa estará en nuestro blog and if you want to see this recipe in english, go to our profile, where we run through the exact same recipe, but in english, so all our english speaking fans can also follow. Comenzamos esta receta precalentando el horno a 175 grados centígrados.’

'Okay call me delusional, but was that Fernando in this tiktok?'

'Why is fernando voicing a random bakery’s tiktoks?'

'this bakery is in his home town, so maybe he knows them'

'WHY IS THE BAKERY OWNER SO PRETTY'

---

i am going to apologise now because I doubt this made sense :)

taglist: @leosxrealm, @pear-1206, @tallrock35, @wolf-knights, @janeholt3

#f1 x reader #miloformula123fan #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #fernando alonso x reader #fernando alonso #fernando alonso fanfic #fernando alonso fic #fernando alonso x female reader #fernando alonso x y/n #fernando alonso x you

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vxiphoid · 2 years ago

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✦ HOME SWEET HOME(MATES)

❨ leona as your roommate ❩ basically roommates to lovers, i am dying for this trope holy shit. kinda ooc leona (im not sure but ill put this here anyways.), some cursing, mention of marriage like once, other than that really fluffy.

2k+ words

MOVING IN, WELCOME HOME, LEONA !!

MONTH I

when he first moved in, you were expecting some imperious, egotistical, loud-mouthed prince and well, the imperious part wasn’t exactly wrong. you barely even see the dude and when you do, he’s on the couch, slumped. half of the time you forget you even have a roommate. hell, the dude barely even talks to you. the first time you actually talk to him, after a month of living with each other, is when he placed an assload of dishes in the sink after you had respectfully washed them on his week.

that’s how you found yourself practically hip to hip with a prince, elbows deep in soapy water, hands brushing occasionally. he refused to wash the dishes he had purposely dropped in the sink while you were finishing the last dish. how long was he hoarding these in his room? you didn’t know but you made a deal with him. you help him wash the dishes but he has to finish the rest of his week, simple enough since it is his responsibility. hell, when you saw the tower he placed in the kitchen you damn near tore his ear off dragging him back to his mess. what were you, his mother? maybe he just needed some house training, assuming he lived in some mansion with an unimaginable amount of maids.

leona’s chest rumbled and his ear flicked with discomfort, his lip twitching upward into a grimace. sparing him a glance, you bumped his hip with yours. “lighten up, its not that bad.”

“i think i just touched peanut butter. wet peanut butter.”

your stomach tightened and you instinctively pursed your lips to prevent the laughter bubbling in your throat. okay, maybe it was that bad. his tail flicked your leg in annoyance. he has to give you some credit, some. washing dishes wasn’t the most pleasing thing however he had to admit, you weren’t that bad of company. now he was the one stealing glances at you, emerald eyes roving across the expanse of your figure before finally settling on your face. easy on the eyes. he returned his gaze to his hands that were violently scrubbing a dish.

he even returned your gentle hip bump.

ITS LATE, TALK TO ME

MONTH II

he’s actually been in your room a few times, mostly when you’re out, so he can steal that comfy ass bed of yours. though tonight, its clearly different when the lion comes stumbling into your room and plops down on your bed. its weird, at first, but you slowly slid beside him and stared at the ceiling together. it wasn’t until you made some comment that started the late night, half-asleep talking.

“oh! that one dude,” you snap your fingers for remembrance, “ruggie, was it? does he actually eat dandelions?”

the vibes that radiated through your room is therapeutic. mood lighting, a person to talk to, and a dedicated playlist for this occasion. leona’s voice is rather calming with the slight hint of drowsiness, someone you would definitely pay to have a story read to you. he’s told you more about night raven; his acquaintances, not friends, what he’s studied. the college sounded like a lively place, unlike the boring shared apartment route. though, it is a little less boring now.

leona hums, your question quickly answered with acknowledgment. “yeah. he’s weird like that but he’s alive, thats really all i care about.” he says. his voice is soft and slightly deeper than what you’re used to hearing. it makes something in your chest constrict and tighten at the same time.

“he eats pumpkin seeds, don’t he?” you deadpan.

leona lets out a noise that sounded extremely similar to a laugh to which he, badly, attempted to cover up with a cough. you practically spring up, “are you.. laughing? did i just make you laugh? the leona kingscholar?” “nuh-uh.” the more you continued to shower him with this teasing, the harder it got to actually compose his grin, he’s already turned away from you. the look of pure mirth on his face is enough for you to forget what stress you ever had. in a weird way, you feel kind of privileged knowing that you were able to make him smile. you’d take this over any other day, perhaps you liked your new roommate.

OH LOOK, A CAFE !!

MONTH III

leona was actually contempt to take a small detour from your walk together, he really didn’t care where went. all he knows is that he needs a nap. you were actually looking for somewhere nice to sit down to help leona with his studies, the cafe down the street sounded like a decent date. study date. no one told him there were cats in there!

“how is it?” you ask smugly.

leona looks up from the table, a half glare shot at you as he sucks cupcake frosting from the pad of his thumb. he releases his thumb with a wet pop and a once over at his lips, “i like it as much as much as you like stealing my clothes.” then he pushed the cupcake into his mouth, his eyes flicking to his button up around your body.

you intertwine your fingers, resting your chin upon your hands. “it was in my dirty clothes basket, i washed it, therefore it is mine.” you quip back playfully, taking a sip out of your latte.

“it literally has my name sewn onto the back.” he counters.

“yeah, with the smoothest fucking silk i’ve ever felt!” he shrugged as to say no big deal but you knew he secretly liked it from the way he kept eyeing it, just not enough to admit vocally. you’re the only person he could tolerate wearing his clothes, so sue him for not being able to wear anything else in your house for some days until they got clean. “think about it; if you marry me, we’d share the same last name, eh? eeeh?” you wiggle your eyebrows at him.

he huffs, a playful smile gracing his features. “oh, you would just love that, wouldn’t you? have a little field day?” he raises an eyebrow as he takes another bite of cake, his voice full of mock amusement.

a brown cat hopped onto the table, your little corner now surrounded by the cute animals. almost all of them taking complete interest in your dear prince. rubbing their warm bodies against him as if they had been waiting their whole life for him to show up. one by one, they hop onto him, sniffing at his neck as if he were their food and he sat stiffly. you on the other hand indulged your one kitten with satisfying scratches under its chin, staring in pure adoration as a cat rubbed its face against leona’s cheek. you had to take a few pictures, it was a must have in your camera roll.

“papa cat with his litter of kittens.” you cooed softly as you snap another picture.

leona’s ear flicked in irritation, “cheka is enough.”

ITS SPA DAY !

MONTH IV

leona was already suspicious when you willingly lead him to your room, even more when you pat your lap. what is he, some cat? still laid down though, a win is a win. its crazy how comfortable he’s gotten with you. so comfortable, he’s letting you card your heavenly hands through his thick mane to pin it back for whatever substance you’re going to rub onto his face.

leona’s right eye spontaneously closed as you neared his face with a dropper, the glass tube smeared its cool continents on his cheek. “what’s this one? part ninety-nine of glass skin treatment?”

lord knows he doesn’t need it, he already has glass skin, it was just an excuse to poke n prod his squishy cheeks. you didn’t bother do answer, instead rolling your eyes and rubbing the serum onto his skin. its been what, twenty minutes? leona hasn’t fallen asleep, mostly because he’s staring at you. the dim lighting made your skin glow, made you glow. in the dark, you were a star that would have burned down by now if not for a miracle or magic spell, was he that spell? like an angel or an extraterrestrial. your stare was hypnotic. your stare made him forget everything around him, your gaze made him lose his footing. he felt himself moving forward and backward at the same time, the air between you became charged.

“you have a weird taste in roommates, herbivore.”

your hands pause at the curve of his neck, then move up to run through his thick hair. your touch made his skin flush, his breath hitch at a low frequency. you grin, “mm, yeah? is that right?”

his eyelids flutter at the feel of your thumbs rubbing over his temples, “you’re doing the thing again.” he breathes out. you chuckle, “the thing? the temple rubbing thing?” “your little thing, the smile and that voice thing.”

“ohh…” you roll your tongue against the roof of your mouth before smiling wider, “should i stop?”

he doesn’t respond right away, the moment stretches into minutes. he’s fading in and out of dreamland and wanting to stay awake for more of your touch. “jus’ a bit longer.”

RAINY DAY IN, MOVIE NIGHT ?

MONTH V

you two actually had plans to go to out but when opened the door for you just for it to be absolutely pouring outside, he settled for a movie. you got all the blankets while leona got all the snacks. what movie you both were watching? he doesn’t know, you make a phenomenal pillow though.

the tv was basically just murmuring, your vision unfocused as your hand absently played with leona’s hair. you knew that once he lied down, he was going to fall asleep. his whole weight flush against your body and cheek smooched into your chest, his tail swishing slowly showing he was awake in some way. you shift your head to look at him, catching a whiff of sweetness from his hair. some sadness settled in the pit of your gut. leona wasn’t always going to be here, he had to return to his studies and his royalty business. you couldn’t keep him even if you tried.

“did you fall asleep or are you upset, herbivore?”

his voice startled you out of your revere, you hummed in response, his words not quite processing correctly.

“your heartbeat slowed and you stopped playing with my hair.” he said as if it was the most obvious thing ever. you hadn’t even noticed you stopped stroking his head. you turn his head to hold his face in your hands, his eyes droopy from sleep. those eyes doing the unimaginable to your heartstrings. “you gotta to go back, don’t you?”

leona gives you a slow blink, his hand resting over yours. “‘course i do.” he yawns.

it was a really selfish thought, wanting to keep him forever. if you had the chance you would carry him in your pocket at all times.

“here,” leona removes his hand from yours, taking something from his pocket and holding it up for you to see. its a ring, its silver color catching the light from the tv. on his ring finger was a slightly bigger one, matching pairs. “its a promise ring.” he takes your hand from his face to slide it onto you but you pull your hand away. he’s confused at your reaction, looking at you like you’ve grown an extra head. your eyes are glossed over, tears forming. something was screaming that it was too early, that he was moving too fast. then your lips lifted into a grin, you laugh but they come out shaky. “its a promise ring, you gotta make a promise, leo.”

“you’re so sappy.” he frowns albeit the blanket of relief blanketing over his heart. he takes your hand once more, securely this time. “i promise to come back.” he places a kiss to the pad of your ring finger before sliding the silver band onto it, returning your hand to his cheek and pressing a firmer kiss to your palm. you watch the silver bleed into a rose color, a soft vibration in your finger when leona’s changed as well. you smile widely, tears streaming down your face. emotions flew and popped like fireworks throughout your body, uncontainable, freed. you laugh as he leans his forehead onto yours, wiping your tears with his thumb and letting out a few purrs of content.

“you’re really happy, huh? so happy you’re shedding tears for me?” “mmhmm, shut up. lemme enjoy this, enjoy you. please?” “as you wish.”

LAST, BUT NOT FINAL, GOODBYES

MONTH IV

welp, its time to say goodbye. you had your ups and— well, mostly ups, you never fought with leona. by the time you had helped leona pack his stuff and belongings, it was past noon. he looked the least bit of interested and you were doing most of the moving. in his own way of saying he doesn’t want to leave, he lazes on the couch and sometimes tugs you down with him.

“you’re sure you have your toothbrush, your expensive hair products, everything?”

leona let out a pained groan from the couch, his ring finger buzzing. “herbivore, you’re stressing.” your eyes flicked to the band on his finger, the color fading to a wine red.

he held his arm out to you, to which you inhaled, held it, then let it out through your mouth when you were under the warmth of his arm. “i know… i just want to make sure you don’t forget anything, leo.” your voice was muffled as you breathed into his chest.

“if i forget anything important, id buy a new whatever it is. you’d want it more though, for when you’re missing your better other half.” leona nudged his chin into your head and you visibly relaxed against him. he let himself sink into the softness of your body, wrapping his arms around you, his fingers trailing up and down your back in a soothing pattern. a thrum shooting through both of your fingers signaling a color change in the rings.

…then the sound of buzzing from the coffee table.

leona curses, apologizing as he reached to get it. taking a glance at the screen he sighs, patting your hip. “that’s my ride.”

he had already shipped off his heavy luggage to night raven so the only thing left to do was wish him off. its not the last goodbye, you’d see him again. only through a screen and through texts before he has his next break and can see you again. you stood on your front porch, shifting your weight from leg to leg while you worried your lip. he eyes you, slowly opening his arms just for you to pounce on him. enclosing your limbs around his body as tightly as you could, your face pressed into his neck, your hands gripping the fabric of his jacket. he chuckles, giving you a reassuring squeeze. “you better come back.” you mutter.

leona sets you down, wiping any incoming tears from your eyes. “i promised, didn’t i?”

your lips curl up in a watery smile. he pulls away from you, making his way to the car waiting in the parking lot. you had this stupid little grin on your face when you noticed the happy whip in his tail from the interaction. halfway to his ride, leona stops, turning on his heel and sprinting back to you, yelling that he had forgotten something. you were already beginning to scold him but was quickly silenced by his lips. he kisses you sweetly and with enough passion to rival that of the sun, his hand gently cupping your cheek, thumb running across the skin there. you lean forward, melting into the kiss, and the two of you finally separate after what felt like an eternity. his eyes are glistening, a slight sheen over them betraying his emotional state, but you had no qualms about kissing him, even after the short months. it still makes you dizzy when you see the love radiating from his eyes.

“you got a partner in six months? are you fucking kidding me?!”

you peek over leona’s shoulder, a boy with short fluffy hair and blue eyes, big hyena ears from his messy hair yelling from the car window. just like leona described him, ruggie. your prince kisses under your eye, his demeanor quickly changing as he faced ruggie. “you have no game, that’s all. don’t blame me for being simply better.” leona states calmly.

only when the car pulled off did you notice your ring beaming gold, magic swirling beneath the thick material.

back to twst masterlist

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javierpena-inatacvest · 1 year ago

Note

Because i can't get enough with Javi and Osita, for your 500 follower celebration, could I request #19 with themmmm?

and btw congratsssss for your 500 followers! you have so much talented, i love your writing so muchhhhh you deserved more and more followers ❤❤❤❤❤

Nonnie!!!! Thank you so much, you are so sweet 😭💖 I literally cannot get enough of them either and this one put me in the feels bc UGH I would say this is spoilers but its not because y'all already know how feral I am to give these two a baby mwahahahha

Peanut Butter and Pickles

Summary: When Javi can't find you at the house, he begins to panic. Little does he know, you were just out at the store picking up your new, weird pregnancy craving.

Word Count: 1.2K (GOLD STAR FOR ME THIS IS THE SHORTEST THING I'VE EVER DONE)

Warnings: FLUFFFFFF, pregnancy, anxiety, mentions of food/eating, Javi just being a protective dad to be and literally just the cutest UGH

A/N: I need dad Javi deep in my bones. I NEED IT.

This can be read alone or as part of the It's Never Too Late Series!

Prompt from the 500 Followers Celebration Request!

From the moment he found out you were pregnant, Javier Peña had become an absolute nervous wreck. Not because he didn’t want to be a dad, not because he wasn’t over the moon excited to finally have the family he had always wanted, not even because he was worried about all of the ups and downs that parenthood could throw at him. Javier Peña was a nervous wreck, because there was nothing he wanted more than to give you and that baby everything in life that you’d ever deserved, and then some. Ever since he saw those two pink lines across the 6 pregnancy tests you had shown him almost 8 months ago (because you honestly couldn’t believe it either), Javi was willing to drop anything and everything to make sure you had everything you needed to keep you and that baby happy and healthy.

You generally prided yourself on being incredibly independent, not needing to ask for help on many things because you could figure it out on your own. That all came to a crashing halt the moment Javi found out you were expecting. As much as you insisted that you were more than capable of doing normal things around the house, this man couldn’t even let you get up to get a glass of water without offering to do it for you. You tried to fight it for a while, but now that you were 8 months pregnant in the middle of the sweltering July heat, you had found yourself more than happy to take up Javi on anything he was willing to help with.

On this particular day, you had found yourself absolutely miserable- your back was killing you, you were absolutely exhausted, and you could not stop eating because you knew you were craving something, but you just couldn’t figure out what it was. You wandered over to the kitchen, for what must have been the 14th time today, opening and closing the fridge and pantry until it finally hit you. You needed pickles and peanut butter. Like, now. Looking over at the clock, you knew Javi would be close to being home soon, and would be more than happy to pick you up anything that you needed. He honestly probably would have been less shocked by this request than your one for tuna and ice cream a few weeks ago. But you couldn’t wait for Javi to get home, and with how close the grocery store was, you figured you’d probably be there and back before he even got to the house and there wasn’t any use in telling him that you’d be gone. Pulling your tank top down over your bulging belly, you slipped on your shoes and grabbed your keys, heading out to your car to head out to the grocery store.

There hadn’t been a day that had gone by since Javi found out that you were pregnant that he hadn’t come home from work with the goofiest grin on his face. It didn’t matter how shitty his day had been, the fact that he knew he got to come home to you and the beautiful baby growing in your belly was the only thing in the world he needed to make him happy. That smile, however, quickly began to fade as he pulled into the driveway and realized that your car was gone. Trying his best to be rational, Javi jumped out of the car, not even bothering to grab his things as he ran into through the front door of the house. That rational quickly turned to panic as he went to grab the doorknob and realized that it had been left unlocked. “Hey Hermosa, it’s me!” Javi called out into the family room, greeted by the unsettling silence of no response. Making his way down the halls, opening up every door as he passed, his heart began to race, as you were nowhere to be found. Taking one last deep breath before going into full blown terror, Javi took out his cell phone to call you, hoping that your sweet voice would answer and calm his nerves. His call had the complete opposite effect, hearing the ringtone of your phone from the kitchen repeat over and over again. “Fuck…” He muttered to himself, now racing back to the front of the house, his brain flooded with the terrible what-if’s of why he couldn’t find you. His hand shook as he reached out to grab the doorknob to go back out to his car, but froze the moment he heard the sound of the garage door closing. It had been years since he had to carry a gun, but there was something so instinctive about the way he reached for the back of his waistband, praying with every bone in his body that whatever the reason was for the garage opening wasn’t the same reason he couldn’t find you. He waited a few more moments, slowly making his way towards the noise.

“Oh hey! You’re home!” You grinned as you waddled down the hallway, pickle already dipped into the jar of peanut butter you had opened on the drive back from the store, about to shove another bite into your mouth before noticing the expression on Javi’s face. “Baby, what’s wrong?” Your heart sank to his chest as you rushed over to Javi, standing at the front door with a panic stricken look spread across his face.

“Never scare me like that again.” He whispered, his voice trembling as he wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you tightly before pressing a soft kiss into the hair twisted into a messy bun on your head. “The car was gone and the door was unlocked- I- I tried to call your phone but you left it here. I thought something happened to you, Osita. Fuck, you scared me.” You could feel his heart rate finally starting to slow as you snaked your arms around his waist, peanut butter and pickle still in your hand.

“Javi, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” You looked up at him as he cupped your cheek, rubbing his thumb along your jaw. “Your child is an incredibly hungry monster, just like her daddy, and I was convinced that if I didn’t go get this from the store this second I was literally going to explode. Although I was hoping that peanut butter and pickles was a less scary combination than the tuna and chocolate ice cream she wanted the other week.” You giggled as Javi dropped to his knees, rubbing his palms against your belly, peppering the bump with gentle kisses.

“You still think it’s a girl?” He asked, beaming up at you, his mind now at ease as he had the both of you in front of him.

“If there’s anything I know, it’s that whatever it ends up being, it’s got your appetite.” The both of you laughed as Javi stood back up, planting a tender kiss on your lips before pulling away.

“Whatever it ends up being, I just know you’re gonna be the best momma in the whole world, and I love the both of you more than anything.” You felt your eyes begin to water, wondering how in the world you had ended up so damn lucky.

“We love you too, Jav. Now let me eat my peanut butter and pickles before they get all full of tears and I have to go back out and buy a new jar.”

Taglist: @cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed

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madhatterbri · 3 months ago

Text

Parent Trap | Finn Balor Part 2

Summary: How about a part 2 of Gracie telling reader what Demon said about Becky being her real Mom. I need to know what the reader does.

Parent Trap Part 1

Finn Balor Masterlist

Requested by: @terrortwinunicorn

Taglist: @theworldofotps @smallestsnarkestgirl @miss-kuki-nz @new-zealand-chic @magicalbuttertarts

Y/N stormed to the door. She half expected it to be locked. To her surprise, the door opened when she twisted the doorknob. The Demon sat with his arms crossed. His bottom lip pouted. She swore she saw tears in his eyes. All the rage inside of her subsided.

"Are you.... crying?" The concerned woman asked. She didn't even know he could cry. The Demon had been a royal pain in the ass.

"No, I'm not some weak human," he sniffled. The Demon rolled over to his side to face the wall. His body twitched slightly to signal he was still crying. His arms moved to wipe away his tears.

"Why are you crying?"

"I'm not crying. I just have something in my eyes,"

"Demon,"

"She doesn't want to play with me anymore, okay?" The Demon asked. He sat up in his bed and stared at her. More tears fell down his face. The poor thing had never looked so pathetic in her eyes.

Y/N's mouth dropped open in shock. "Demon, she loves you,"

"She is growing up and forgetting about me. Grace used to play with me like that. Now she is always going over to friend's houses or having them here. I.... I miss when it was just her and I," he confessed. His light eyes stared at his hands.

"Demon," Y/N sighed and sat on his bed. He backed away from her. His legs pulled to his chest. Well, at least he still detested her. That would never change. "Why don't the two of you do something fun tonight? We can get your favorites and build a fort in the living room,"

The Demon perked up slightly. "Really?"

"Yes, Finn went to take her out to calm her down after what you did. We can start working on it now," she offered.

The Demon scrunched his face. "I don't need help from a human,"

"Great," she sighed and stood up from the bed. "You know if you are ever sad, you can talk to Finn or I. We can help you,"

"Why would I ever want to ask humans for help?"

Y/N bit back a remark and walked out of the room. She texted Finn about the situation at the house. Her husband decided to buy some treats to help with the slumber party. The Demon was hard at work in the living room. Black blankets in different shapes and sizes filled the room. Different sized pillows were laid out for them to enjoy.

The Demon was finished with his fort in no time. He added all of Grace's favorite things inside. A sign hung up in the entrance read No Humans Grace OK. After he was done with the finishing touches, he supervised Y/N and her cooking.

"She doesn't like the crusts on her peanut butter and jelly," he pointed out.

"Yes, Demon, I know," Y/N spoke.

"And make sure you don't burn the pizza rolls this time. Finn hasn't had time to buy another fire extinguisher," The Demon reminded. Y/N swallowed another insult. He eyed the platter next to him. It had some of their favorites: cheese sticks, pretzels, and ... carrots. His face scrunched at the healthy snack. "Carrots? Who is eating that? It's disgusting,"

"They are there so I can sharpen a side and stab you," she muttered under breath.

The Demon seemingly didn't hear her. "Well, I am going to get ready. Try to not burn the apartment down,"

The Demon left to put on his pajamas. The front door to the apartment opened. Grace came in carrying a box of Capri Sun. Finn carried a couple of bags inside.

"You doing better, sweetheart?" Y/N asked. She noticed some chocolate syrup on the side of her mouth. Finn must have taken her to the ice cream shop after the park.

"What Demon did was mean," she pouted and crossed her arms.

"Yes, Gracie, but he loves you," Y/N reminded. The Demon came out seconds later. "And I think he has something he wants to show you,"

Grace slowly walked towards the Demon. As soon as she saw the fort, her eyes lit up. "Really?"

She ran inside the fort. The doll house was in there along with her tea table set. Grace ran out with a huge smile on her face. She ran and gave him a big hug. "I love it, Demon!"

Y/N swore she saw more tears in his eyes. He blinked them back quickly and cleared his throat. "Go get changed so we can play,"

While Grace was in her room, Finn and Y/N rushed to get everything ready for the slumber party. They placed the food on the tea table for them to snack on. Grace walked out of her room with three of her favorite stuffed animals in tow. She walked inside the entrance to check out more of the inside of the fort.

"Wow, carrots? I love them. Thanks, Mommy!" Grace complimented.

"Yeah, those are my favorite too," the Demon commented.

Finn and Y/N found themselves inside their bedroom. They tried to minimize leaving the room to avoid disturbing the Demon and Grace. At around midnight, the noises in the living room turned to soft snores. Finn and Y/N walked out to investigate.

Inside the fort, Grace was snuggled into the Demon. Her head rested comfortably on his chest. One of the Demon's arms wrapped securely around her body. In the Demon's other hand clutched a picture that Grace drew of them together.

#fanfiction #wwe fanfiction #wwe fanfic #finn balor #finn balor x reader #finn balor x y/n #finn balor fanfic #finn balor fanfiction

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mcflymemes · 2 years ago

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THE PARENT TRAP PROMPTS * assorted dialogue from the 1998 film

what's going on?

i have class and you don't.

i'll tell you what i'm gonna do.

what was your mother like?

i agree. it totally sucks.

we actually did it!

still biting those nails, i see.

oh, don't do this to me. i'm already seeing double.

any of your pictures ruined?

it's time to break up this little love fest.

you're young, beautiful, sexy...

i may never be alone with you again.

what do you expect? to live happily ever after?

what did you call me?

yes. to all of the above.

ooh, let me help you with that.

you know, sometime if we're ever really alone maybe we could talk about what happened between us.

i'm sorry, it's just i've missed you so much.

get the picture?

it ended so fast.

wow, suddenly you're so interested in math!

have you seen your father?

i would pay big money to see that woman climb a mountain.

who are you, robert de niro? yes, i am talking to you.

you probably don't remember me...

if that's the way you want it, then let the games begin.

this arrangement really sucks.

come here, we have to talk.

i think there's something on your head.

i love oreos. at home, i eat them with peanut butter.

okay, sorry. got a little nervous!

the man went completely ashen like i was the bloody ghost of christmas past.

can one of you get something cold for my head?

this is so scary.

i promise i'll make your lives miserable.

i think it's an awesome idea. inspired. brilliant, really.

i know. it seems like it's been forever.

okay, on the count of three, we'll show them to each other.

this is beyond coincidence. this is beyond imagination!

i know she was really beautiful.

most people find that totally disgusting.

totally, it's like a dream come true.

will you stop thinking about your stomach at a time like this?

i'm really thirsty.

i think you're kind of missing the point.

hey, you sounded just like me!

i learned it at camp.

it's me or them.

let's discuss this calmly. calmly and rationally.

this is so scary.

i've never been so happy in my entire life.

i have a brilliant beyond brilliant idea!

excuse me?

may your life be far less complicated than mine.

that's where i have to go.

what are you doing here?

we were so young. we both had tempers, we said stupid things so i packed.

i made the mistake of not coming after you once. i'm not going to do that again no matter how brave you are.

what has gotten into you?

you didn't come after me.

that's perfectly... perfect. have fun.

you can't get married!

i'm not so hungry anymore.

that really doesn't matter anymore.

i suppose you just expect me to go weak at the knees, and fall into your arms, and cry hysterically.

don't shut your eyes!

i'm going to take the lead.

we have a butler?

we decided to switch places.

honey, you never looked better.

this is where we're eating?

that girl is without a doubt the lowest most awful creature to ever walk the planet.

can i hug her?

how exactly are we paying for this?

i'm supposed to, aren't i?

start unzipping.

go on, just do it.

i'm crawling back into bed, and sleeping 'til lunch.

i'll make you a little deal.

i didn't even know you spoke french.

nobody. forget i mentioned it.

i've loved you your whole life.

that does not sound like a possibility, babe.

it'll totally ruin completely everything!

you wanna know the real difference between us?

how did you know that?

that would be correct.

you have no idea.

mine's a pathetic little thing.

i just hope that one day you could love me as me.

thank you, thank you very much!

don't look at me. i don't know a thing.

you're g ood, but you're just not good enough.

what are you rummaging in your trunk for this time?

don't you realize what's happening?

this is so freaky.

if i didn't know any better, i'd say it's almost like you were... forget it. it's impossible.

i hope you're not mad because i love you so much.

loser jumps into the lake after the game.

i changed a lot over the summer.

i've never seen you and i've dreamt of meeting you my whole life.

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spotofimagines · 5 months ago

Text

100 random writing prompts

A collection of prompts in all genres - feel free to send one or many in a request! (Check the bio to see what is open)

“Your words are moving, but I am not.”

“I came for the kid not you.”

“One more and I'm making you walk home.”

“This would look so hot on you. And off of you.”

“It's okay babe, I hate him too.”

"You know I stayed for you, and frankly, I don't regret it one bit."

“All of you are to blame for this, but I can't say I'm surprised.”

“Your thighs are so comfortable.”

“Are you sure? How many times have we gone to the emergency room because you were peeling potatoes too fast?” “Only twice...”

“It's not that precious!” “I'd like to back you up, but it does sound precious.”

“I set up the blanket fort. The password to get in is three words.” (I love you)

“We all know you can't admit your feelings for them, so that's why we're going to get you through this. I have plans.”

“What I don't need is to be involved with your antics.”

“I can't let you get hurt. Who would challenge me then?”

“I'm here. You said it was important, so I'm here. I don't want to be though.”

“Your eyebrows are going to fly off your head if you raise them any higher at me.”

“Oh, you can do it, for sure. I just don't think you should.”

“I knew you wouldn't listen but I figured I'd say it anyway.”

“If it's not a compliment, I don't care.”

“Trust me, I'm an expert.” “You couldn't be more wrong but okay.”

“It could or it couldn't. We're trusting that it won't.”

“Why would you want to ‘fuck life’? The only thing you should be fucking is me.”

“We both know how this is going to go down.”

“I can practically feel your face on my fists already.”

“I wish I loved you less.”

"Are you laughing at me?" "Yeah, I am. What are you going to do about it?"

"Wipe that smile off your face before I do it for you."

“I was expecting disappointment. Prepared myself for it, really.”

“So, a little birdy tells me I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you.”

“There are times where I want to punch you and there are times where I want to hold you. It's an ongoing struggle.”

“Of course I'm excited that you are pregnant, your boobs are going to get so much bigger!”

“I can't believe my dad saw us having sex. He didn't make it to one of my piano recitals, but this he sees.”

“If and when you get lost, come back to me, okay?”

“You're over me? … When were you, under me?”

“I want to be alone... alone with you, does that make sense?”

“You're my best friend, but they're my little brother/sister. You know who's side I'll take.”

“How dare I? How dare you!”

“I didn’t know I needed a reason for that.”

“This has to be the slowest car chase I've ever taken part in.”

“He passed out an hour ago and he's too heavy to move.”

“Where are you going in that outfit?” “How about when I come back, I take it off for you.”

“I don't know where most of her is, but her tongue is in [fill in]'s mouth.”

“It's nice that at least one of you knows how to show your appreciation.”

“I'm not saying you were right, because I'd hate to even imply that, but yes, I guess you were.”

“Why do you love me when you know I can’t love you back?”

“You look like you aren't paying attention to me.” “You would be right.”

“Oh my god, a woman flirting with a single man? We must alert the church elders!”

“I like him a lot. He's real funny.” “If he's funny, LAUGH!”

“That was so mean. I love it. Let's do it again!”

“It's like you don't believe me when I say I can get us out of this. Have some faith, will you?”

“So close to saying something you'd regret, weren't you?”

“I just thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were in love!”

“My favourite part of this is the backhanded compliments.”

“You're seriously proposing? Now?”

“Sleeping next to you was the best sleep I've gotten in years.”

“It's cold and I don't want to be lonely.”

“That's the dogs' peanut butter, ask them, I don't eat that.”

“You look hot as hell in my shirt babe.”

“I love you but some peace and quiet would be wonderful.”

“I didn't want to fall in love, not at all. But at some point you smiled and, holy shit, I blew it.”

“I'm tired of talking to the back of your head at night.”

“Staying the night. Baby, you should be bringing a suitcase.”

“Is it my imagination or is [fill in]'s makeup on your chin?”

“Me? Overreacting?”

“You sound really pretty today.”

“Can't sleep?” “How could you tell?” “You're awake.”

“I'm so sorry we never loved each other at the same time.”

“I love my sleep and you're cutting into my precious minutes of it.”

“You look good too. Did you get a haircut?” “Yeah. Well, I got like 30 of them.”

“Good wow or bad wow?” “I'm not sure yet.”

“Get that disgusted look off your face and hold my hand.”

“You don't have to say sorry, and you don't have to thank me either.”

“I’m done waiting for you.”

“Open up a window and let some of the wrong out.”

“Go to hell.” “Where do you think I came from?”

“Well, I hope you're happy!” “Aw I hope you're happy too, babe.”

“You gaze lovingly at me when I'm not looking?” … “How am I supposed to know! I'm not looking!”

“I told myself I wouldn't cry but I can’t help it.”

“I wouldn't call it good...” “Oh absolutely not. This is the furthest thing from good I've experienced today.”

“I didn’t like the way they looked at you, that’s all.”

“I may seem scared right now, but deep down, really, I’m terrified.”

“How could you marry him?”

“It’s nothing a little tape can’t fix … I hope.”

“All these battle scars and not one on this pretty face.”

“We're not going to die.” “We're not going to die? It bloody feels like we're going to die!”

“I'm not afraid, just not wildly keen...”

“I'm going to be the first thing you think of in the morning, and the last thing you do at night.”

“You don’t remember what you said, do you?”

“Before you blame me for everything, I should remind you that you willingly came with me. No force at all.”

“All the love in the world is nothing compared to how I feel about being able to sleep in.”

“Enjoying the view?” “I would if you weren't in the way…”

“I have to go.” “No, you have to stay here with me.”

“Is this really what we’re doing? Is this all we are now?”

“Come here.” “Why?” “Just come here.” “No, you're going to hit me.”

“You've just been inside of me, you can touch my leg if you want.”

“Now you can relax.”

“Either help me or go.” “Fine I'll go.” “Okay but before you go could you help me first.”

“What did we do?” “Well, first you-“ “I know what we did but what do we do now?!”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“It didn’t feel like pretending to me.”

#prompts #prompt list #writing prompt #my og post

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rjalker · 21 days ago

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Re: Binary privilege. #15 TeeBoi, replying to Jessica Merriman

September 22, 2014, 08:56:05 PM

""Where this binary privilege idea came from is anybody's guess and has no merit at all. What next? People who eat creamy peanut butter get preference in treatment over those who eat chunky style?""

I'm new to this forum, so I'm not sure what the "unwritten" rules are, but I'm massively shocked to see someone (least of all a mod) be so dismissive and derisive of other people's experiences. I am literally having to pretend to be male identified at the moment in order to get treatment for my dysphoria, because non-binary identities are seen as less valid. How can you not see that as a disadvantage? Every time I fill out a form and there's a box next to "F" and a box next to "M" and there's nowhere for me to put my little tick, I am reminded that society doesn't believe I exist. I have been excluded from trans spaces before because I was seen as "not trans enough"! A binary identified person saying binary privilege does not exist is EXACTLY the same as a cis person saying trans people are not discriminated against, or a white person saying racism is a thing of the past. So yeah, I'm shocked that a fellow trans person could be so blinkered, and I'm even more shocked that, as someone of stature in this online community, you would see the struggles of a whole section of that community as comparable to a food preference. Particularly as this is in the gender studies section, even if you disagreed with a point, I would have expected a (frankly) more grown up response. I normally close with ciao peeps, but I'm feeling decidedly less cheerful than that right now Tee

TeeBoi

Re: Binary privilege.

""Enough of the pity party as a lot of us see non binaries with the same access and respect for treatment we binaries have. Both groups have to prove themselves just to get care they need just the same.""

Firstly, you seem to be forgetting that the vast majority of "binaries" don't need to seek treatment at all as they're cis. Secondly, it is incorrect that non binary people have equal access to treatment, and it isn't about opinion, it is about fact; I was refused treatment for dysphoria as ftgq (as per policy), and granted access to the exact same treatment when pretending to be ftm. Finally, when discussing the oppression and suffering of a marginalized section of society, the term "pity party" is highly disrespectful (again, you're a moderator, you should be setting an example).

""YOU are placing a division when you say another group has privilege, not me.""

By that logic, we can blame racism on people of colour because they're "placing a division" when they point it out. What utter nonsense!

Why do you find it so hard to accept that the kyriarchy looks favourably on heteronormative gender identities? Every, and I mean EVERY aspect of our society is dominated by a binary heteronormative narrative. How can anyone deny the inherant privilege that engenders? I think the question should not be if it exists, but rather WHY are we only now starting to talk about it?

#exorsexism #binary privilege #transmisia #trans #transgender #queer #ftm #mtf #ftx #mtx #transmasculine #transfeminine #archiving

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voidsumbrella · 1 month ago

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crepes

---

pros: straightforwards, easy to remember recipe with minimal non-staple ingredients; leftovers keep well; good for breakfast *and* dinner; makes for a good "everyone hang out in the kitchen and cook together" party food

cons: cooking technique can be fidgety and requires a bit of practice to get consistent; requires a lot of standing over the stove (might want a stool or smth)

---

minimum equipment:

mixing bowl

spoon/whisk

1 cup measure; 1 tbsp* measure; 1/2 tsp measure

decently sized flat skillet, preferably lightweight

spatula for flipping

*unless your butter has the measurements on the stick, in which case you don't need this one

optional/upgraded equipment:

blender large enough to mix the batter so you don't have to whisk it as much

a ladle is the easiest way to measure the batter ime

they make specialty crepe pans and spreading sticks- i don't have them, but they seem cool.

---

ingredients:

2 eggs

2 tbsp melted butter

1 cup milk

1 cup flour

1/2 tsp salt

notes:

if you're making dessert or sweet crepes you can add 1 tsp sugar

can be doubled or tripled as needed

milk can be non-dairy

butter can be subbed with any neutral oil

i haven't tried using gf flour but it probably works fine

if you can't eat eggs you might need to find a different recipe entirely

---

instructions:

mix all ingredients- add the melted butter last so it doesn't clump up as much. if you're mixing by hand, get it as smooth as you can and then let it sit for about 15-20 mins so any remaining lumps can dissolve. using a blender results in fewer lumps to begin with, so you don't have to wait.

heat your skillet up on medium-low, you don't need to add oil or anything, there's enough in the batter to keep it from sticking

spoon batter- the amount is going to vary based on the size of your pan, but roughly a quarter cup or so- into the center of the pan, and spread it thin using one of a variety of methods:

if your pan is light, you can pick it up and tilt it in a circle so the batter coats as much of it as possible. this leaves a thin crispy edge, but is otherwise fairly consistent.

you can use your ladle or spatula to push the batter around until it's thin. definitely easier on the wrists, but i personally am very bad at getting it even.

this is what the fancy sticks are for!! i can't give advice on that one though.

if your batter's thin enough it might spread on its own, but that usually indicates that the pan isn't hot enough.

cook until the top of the crepe is solid/there are no more shiny liquid spots, and the edges are just starting to crisp, then flip- the underside should be evenly brown. continue cooking until steam starts coming from underneath, and there are light brown patches where the crepe is directly touching the pan. this process happens faster than you expect it to- maybe a minute or so each side.

remove from heat promptly- they'll be a bit crunchy, but will relax if you let them let sit for 30-ish seconds.

repeat until you're out of batter!

fillings can include jam, powdered sugar and lemon juice, just butter, peanut butter, spinach bacon cheese goop (that's it's own post), or whatever you want to fit in there.

---

troubleshooting:

crepe doesn't spread easily: your batter's too thick, add more milk/milk sub/water in 1 tbsp increments until it works.

crepe sticks to pan: not enough butter/oil, add some in 1/2 tsp increments until it works. just greasing the pan won't actually fix it.

crepe dries out and gets crunchy before browning: your heat isn't high enough.

crepe burns before cooking through: your heat's too high.

crepe smells and tastes like rancid canola oil: you are me from 2020. cry for 5 minutes and remake the batter.

#recipe #crepes #real life mango

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requiemofrebellion · 1 year ago

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@deathfavor ― * ― Send in 📜 and I’ll use this incorrect quotes generator using your muse and my muse.

📜 give it to me for them all ( or as many as you wanna do )

Draken, in a meeting: My policy is if you see something, say something. Hanma: I saw a squirrel in a tree today! Draken, with the tone of someone who is used to Hanma: Outstanding. Draken: This is what I’m talking about people.

Hanma: Whaddya call a fish with no eye? Draken, not looking up: Myxine Circifrons Hanma: Hanma: fsh

Kazutora: Is something burning? Hanma: Just my love for you. Kazutora: Hanma, the toaster is on fire.

Hanma: English is a difficult language. It can be understood through tough thorough thought, though. Kazutora: You need to stop.

Kisaki: Hanma was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some. Hanma: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it. Kisaki: Hanma, you ate a chair.

Hanma: You saved me. I owe you my life. Kisaki: No thanks. I’ve seen it and I’m not very impressed.

Kisaki, tending to Kazutora's wounds: How would you rate your pain? Kazutora: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

Kazutora, standing with their back turned: I’ve been expecting you, Kisaki. Kisaki: How did you do that without turning around? Kazutora: ... To be perfectly honest, the first couple of people I did that to were not you.

Hanma, to Kazutora: My life is in the hands of an idiot! Kazutora, motioning to themself and Kisaki: No no no no no, TWO idiots!

Hanma: What did you do with Kisaki's body? Kazutora: What didn’t I do with the body? Hanma: Kazutora: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.

Izana: I’m going to take you out Mikey: great, it’s a date! Izana: I meant that as a threat. Mikey: See you at five!

Mikey: I prevented a murder today. Izana: Really? How’d you do that? Mikey: self control.

Izana: Kakucho! My face is on fire! Kakucho: Izana! Are you ok?! Izana: Oh yes, I'm fine. I just said that to make sure you'd come in here quickly. Kakucho: But your face is on fire. Izana: Yes. It's much faster than shaving.

Kakucho: Violence isn't the answer. Izana: You’re right. Kakucho: *sighs in relief* Izana: Violence is the question. Kakucho: What? Izana, bolting away: And the answer is yes. Kakucho, running after them: NO-

Izana: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three- Izana and Hanma, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks! Kisaki: Our turn, Kakucho! One, two, three- vanilla! Kakucho, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.

Kakucho: *Screams* Izana: *Screams louder to assert dominance* Kisaki: Should we do something?! Hanma, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.

Mikey: Care for another sundae, weenie? Izana: I am not a weenie! Kisaki: Relax, you’re among friends. *raises their drink* Izana: My friends don’t hang out at Weenie Hut Jr’s. Hanma: You tell ‘em, Izana! *sips their drink* Izana: Hanma, what’re you doing here? Hanma: I’m always here on Double Weenie Wednesdays.

Mikey: Tonight, one of you will betray us. Izana: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: No, it’s not you. Kisaki: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: It’s not you either. Hanma: Is it me, Mikey? Mikey: Mikey, mockingly: Is IT mE Mikey?

Mikey: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Kisaki will and will not eat. Izana: Grass? Yes! Mikey: Moss? Yes!! Izana: Leaves? Ohh, yes! Mikey: Shoelaces? Strange but true! Izana: Worms? Sometimes! Mikey: Rocks? Usually nah. Izana: Twigs? Usually! Mikey: Kakucho's cooking? Inconclusive! Hanma: How did you… test this? Mikey: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it. Hanma: ... I don’t know how to feel about this. Kakucho: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

Kakucho: What does 'take out' mean? Izana: Food. Mikey: Dating Hanma: Murder Kisaki: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD.

Hanma: *Kicks the door down looking panicked* Kakucho: What did you do? Hanma: Nobody died. Kakucho: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

Kakucho: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? Hanma: You mean literally or figuratively? Kakucho: Honestly, the fact that I have to specify...

Hanma: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. Chifuyu: Wasn't Kazutora with you? Kazutora: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

Chifuyu: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited Hanma: If? Kazutora: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and they might not even die.

Chifuyu: I’m gonna need a human skull and I can't have you ask any questions why. Hanma: Only if you also don't ask why Hanma: *Pulls out 7 pristine human skulls* Take your pick. Chifuyu: Hanma: Chifuyu: This one is fine

Hanma: Do you take constructive criticism? Chifuyu: I only take cash or credit.

Hanma: Okay. I get it. You've had a really hard time lately, you're stressed out, seven people died- Lamia: Twelve, actually. Hanma: Not the point. Look, they're dead now and really whose fault is that? Lamia: Yours! Hanma: That's right: no one's.

Lamia: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I'll wait. Hanma: You and me!!! Lamia, tearing up: Okay.

Chifuyu: Are you an ‘arr’ pirate, or a ‘yo ho ho’ pirate? Serpent: I’m a ‘I’m not paying $600 for photoshop’ pirate.

Serpent: That’s one of my biggest fears. Like, if I ever woke up as a donut... Chifuyu: You would eat yourself? Serpent: I wouldn’t even question it.

Machi: *holding a bottle* Is this whiskey or perfume? Chrollo: *chugs entire bottle* Chrollo: It’s perfume.

Chrollo: WHAT’S YOUR TYPE Machi: Anything, honestly, but nerds especially Chrollo, desperately, as Machi bleeds out: YOUR BLOOD TYPE Machi: Oh! B positive. Chrollo: DONT TRY TO CHEER ME UP JUST TELL ME YOUR BLOOD TYPE Machi:

Shinya: *Gets down on one knee* Byakkomaru: Oh my god, it’s finally happening. Shinya: *Falls over* Byakkomaru: The poison is kicking in.

Byakkomaru: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail Shinya: No it’s my fault, I shouldn’t’ve used my one phone call to prank call the police

Shinya: This is such a bad idea. Horn: Then why are you coming along? Shinya: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

Horn: You often use humor to deflect trauma Shinya: Thank you Horn: I didn't say that was a good thing Shinya: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny

Killua: I actually have a black belt. Kalluto: In what, karate? Killua: No, from Gucci.

Kalluto: I turned out perfectly fine! Killua: Kalluto, this morning you thought a ghost made your toast Kalluto: I DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN! YOU DIDN’T PUT THE BREAD IN!!!

Inui: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are. Izana: It’s not a joke. Izana: *sniffles* Izana: I’m a legit snack.

Izana: Am I going too far? Inui: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

Draken: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY] Kazutora: What's that? Draken: Remorse code. Kazutora: I'm even angrier now.

Kazutora, struggling to keep upright in their 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don’t really think heels are for me Draken, pointing at them and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

Kazutora: I'm incredibly fast at math. Mikey: Alright, what's 30x17? Kazutora: 47 Mikey: That's not even close. Kazutora: But it was fast.

Mikey: What’s up guys? I’m back. Kazutora: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die. Mikey: Death is a social construct.

Mikey: I slept for almost 12 hours but I might still be tired so lets go for 12 more just incase. Hanma: Mikey, that's a coma. Mikey: Sounds festive.

Hanma: What if the 'g' in 'gif' is silent? Mikey: Go the fuck to sleep Hanma: What gif I don't want to? Mikey: Fuck You

#I BELIEVE I DID THEM ALL AND NO I AM NOT TAGGING IT WITH EVERY MUSE OMG #;; crack #deathfavor #i am crying and laughing and some of these are omg dffdgs spot on some of them LMAO

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crystalwinterarmy · 2 months ago

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I learned there are two types of possessive people with going through a break up.

Story time!!!!

I am in a trio friends group, i'll name the other two PH3(that's her wattpad and youtube account name so yeah) and PB or peanut butter (because PB is her initials). The three of us are really close. Like FREAKISHLY CLOSE. Especially me and PH3. All three of us had went through toxic friendship and abandonment issues from other friends and i think that sort of made us come closer.

I am the emotional one in the group. The other two are quite apathetic. PB in some what empathetic about some people in some situations but she's strong headed and confident. She's got that cool hero who's all about Justice but also has a nice humour and an understanding side to her. (And hella hot tbh, she's a tomboy too). She's usually the therapist friend and a great comfort to me and PH3, both of whom come from tough backgrounds.

PH3, on the other hand is completely different. That girl is on another level i say. If you piss her off, she will diss you off. Whatever you do, do not insult her hobbies. But once you get through that tough and uncaring, cool and easygoing yet fake exterior, you'll find a warm, caring, hesitant and a soft girl who's just Afraid of getting hurt sometimes. I hope you never do. Only i can see through that and i want to be the only one to notice the little details that make her... Well.. Her.

A while back, something happened, not a fight Between us but something. PH3 left with a note saying she was ending our friends with me and PB. We knew one day it would eventually happen but it still hurted since it was so abrupt. I was heart broken. There wasn't a single day where i didn't send PH3 a YouTube video or something and now i can't even do that? (She had blocked me too)

I crying for hours on end. Refusing to eat, crying myself to sleep waking up crying and doing stupid things. I cried for roughly 18 hours straight and went numb for the next few days, having frequent mental breakdowns. I kept checking our massages and sending massages like 'i miss you'. (Yes, i know cringy. Teen girls are cringy. Pardon us) It was really bad until it wasn't. When she finally unblocked me, suddenly all my worries and sorrows when away and i was.... Okay? Just to be able to send her a link and know she is still there, receiving them.

After that we warmed up again, though PH3 never apologised to the two of us but that's fine. We don’t care, we're just happy to have her back and we knew she felt bad about what she did. Man she's cute when She's angry. But also scary. That was my side. I am a possessive person but i feel as if i was less jealous and more laid back with PH3 that my other Friendships.

Oh boy, then there’s our family favorite Tomboy, Peanut butter. Now THAT girl gives me bi panic. She's literally aroace and so damn understanding I never thought she has it in her. She was always a respectful gal who never stepped the boundaries and never ever made an impulsive decision..... Until two days ago at school when we all finally warmed up and when back to being friends again. (PH3 also bombed me with a heartfelt letter after i gave her one. It was sort of a therapy to the both of us since we struggle opening up). After a while, Peanut butter turned to PH3 saying she had something to confess....

Peanut butter had looked up PH3 mother, copy pasted her mothers phone info into some sort of abomination that allowed her to get access to PH3 mothers phone (since PH3 uses it). Just to make sure PH3 is alright. She only looked up the location of the phone and said she refused to look through anything else. We believed her but just to prove her point she exactly dated some of the location the phone was. (None of us knew where exactly PH3 lived). PH3 had her mouth agape because she did not expect that from peanut butter. She was flabbergasted. I was more surprised by my own reaction. I wasn't even shocked, i was like 'ohh, that means we can use it to track her so she can't go missing on us' (i know it sounds creepy and obsessive and yeah, it is)

None of us expect this from Peanut butter, she, who is so respectful of others. Maybe the madness of our crazy year at school finally got to her? PH_ was beyond shocked, she looked at us both and went, 'i thought i was insane. But really, i am the most sane one here. One cries for 18 hours and the other tracks me. Just great'.

Nonetheless, we are still friends. Peanut butter asked for forgiveness and all was fine again!! Yay! At least for now.....

So that was when i realized how obsessive we were. One became self destructive while the other started to stalk. Not good! But we work through it and push forward! We love you, PH3. No matter what.

#friends #Friendship #toxic frienship #toxic relationship #shitpost #school #Life #Teens #teen stuff

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meganwasbored · 1 year ago

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The Dragon Prince Thoughts Season 5 Episode 1

-i can’t believe i had to wait a whole extra week to watch this this is all i’ve been thinking about i’m so ready

-also i think it goes without saying that this is gonna be a hard season for rayla

-callum and rayla aren’t with them meaning they’re probably together rn

-love how we already have no idea what’s going on

-oh boy it’s the same intro as season 4

-is she in the castle???

-oh my gosh callum doesn’t know about the coins yet i totally forgot

-i still haven’t fully processed what that poem means but i never get tired of hearing it

-hold up… connect with the ocean arcanum as in… CONNECT to the ocean arcanum?????? IS HE GONNA TRY TO GET ANOTHER ARCANUM DUDE YOU ALMOST DIED GETTING THE LAST ONE

-stop i love them so much

-lady y’all are the only two people in the library

-what’s wrong karim i thought you were all for the death penalty

karim: you need to be more ruthless if you’re going to be queen

janai: ok

karim: *shocked pikachu face*

-mr. no mercy is really expecting sympathy rn

-is that the dragon prince logo or am i tripping

-still very confused about stella’s portals are they just like pockets?

-there is no way that giant key fit in callum’s tiny pocket it’s the size of stella

-literally what is the aaravos creature’s purpose he’s kinda just there

-claudia needs to stop being so mean to terry

-has this room not been looked through once since viren “died”

-STELLA YOU CANT JUST EAT WHAT YOU WANT THERE WAS A HIGH CHANCE THAT THAT WASNT PEANUT BUTTER

-UHHHHHHHHHHHH

-how did they even know shes was there

-“soon you’ll be feeling like a tree in the springtime… re-leaved” this was funny idc

-A GIANT ADORABURR??????

-I WANT IT I WANT IT

-callum really said “my wife can do what she wants”

-claudia finally calms down for five minutes and a demon has a mental breakdown behind her

-also i really really hope “blood of child” is not referring to soren, don’t ask me why or how i had this thought

-WAIT WHY WAS SHE BRACING THE ADORABURR LIKE THAT IF YALL HURT THAT ADORABURR YOURE AS DEAD TO ME AS VIREN IS

-bait and stella becoming friends is something i didn’t know i needed

-DO THEY HAVE A DOGGY DOOR IN BETWEEN THEIR ROOMS FOR BAIT THATS SO CUTE

-oh yeah i totally forgot about what ezran was doing

-DRAGON DRAGON DRAGON

-does this dragon have another map perhaps?

-ezran is always so unfazed by everything that ever happens to him, like he’s always shocked for five seconds and then is right back to business

#the dragon prince #the dragon prince season 5 #the dragon prince thoughts #the dragon prince thoughts season 5 #tdp #tdp thoughts #tdp season 5 #tdp thoughts season 5

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dragonmuse · 2 years ago

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The Roach scene in Hymnless got me wondering if Charlie ever appeared/will appear on the Vengeance Chefs YouTube channel?

(hi all! apparently I still do this from time to time, who knew?! )

“Okay, worms, you asked, I delivered.” Roach reached out of frame, grabbed and pulled Charlie into it by his t-shirt sleeve. “Behold. America’s champion. Say hello.”

“Hi!” Charlie grinned at the camera. “Nice to be back.”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Roach stared down the lens, “I told you I knew an Olympian and you all assumed I was hiding him, but it’s just this tall skinny ass white boy that thinks peanut butter out of a jar is an acceptable snack.”

“I like peanut butter.”

“So do I. ON things.”

“It’s on a spoon,” Charlie pointed out with a sly grin.

“There you have it. Two Olympic medals, not the sense that Mother Earth gave to a mosquito. Charlie, let me ask you the question I ask all my victims.”

“I’ve been in like five videos at this point,” Charlie reminded him. “We’ve done this before.”

“Oh, I know,” Roach nodded. “I’m going to insert a montage right here of your last five answers.”

“Great, I was like fifteen the first time. They can watch me grow like a flipbook. Shoot.”

“Charlie Bonnet, what is your favorite meal to order out?”

“Waffles, eggs and crispy bacon with a coffee.”

“Breakfast food. When is the correct time of day for that food?”

“Any time,” Charlie said staunchly. “Breakfast exists when I break my fast.”

“I have taught you well,” Roach nodded. “All right, a breakfast for a champion. Breakfast of Champions....good fucking book. You read that one?”

“Love Vonnegut, Cat’s Cradle is my favorite though.”

“So it goes,” Roach reached for the eggs.

“So it goes,” Charlie agreed.

“Now if you’re expecting me to ask this fine athlete a lot of jockey questions, I think you all forgot who the fuck I am,” Roach shoved a bowl at Charlie, cracked an egg on the rim then thrust a whisk at him. Charlie started to whisk as Roach added more eggs. “And you’re still thinking this kid is a normal jock.”

“I’m twenty-two,” Charlie pointed out, diligently whisking.

“A mere babe in the woods,” Roach agreed. “And you swim good. Great job. Everyone’s very proud. Got anything to say about that that you haven’t already said on the interview circuit two hundred times which anyone can easily google?”

“Yeah, actually,” Charlie kept his eyes on the eggs.

“Wait, really?”

“Sure,” Charlie glanced over at Roach. “I’ll give you an exclusive soundbite. In fact, I saved it for you.”

“Did you?” Roach asked suspiciously. “Okay, lay it on us.”

“I didn’t eat anything the day I won. I don’t have a magic winning meal,” Charlie shrugged. “That’s not a recommendation, I was just too nervous. My post-win meal was a liter of chocolate milk with three tablespoons of protein powder.”

“Amazing,” Roach patted him vaguely on the shoulder. “Thanks for saving the grossest moments for us.”

“That is so far from the grossest thing,” Charlie said solemnly. “But I’m not here to put everyone off their appetite.”

“Then what are you here for?”

“Decoration, I think. And to do an impression of a stand mixer.”

“Correct!”

They cooked together, bantering a little as Roach shoveled ingredients into Charlie’s bowl. The waffles came out beautifully brown, the bacon crispy and the eggs fluffy. They ate and talked about corruption in sports judging, Roach grilling Charlie like he was personally responsible for the entire concept of judging. Charlie grinned through the whole thing.

Once the cameras were off, Charlie polished off the rest of the bacon while washing pots. Roach dried. They stood almost shoulder to shoulder, not touching, but close.

“You know,” Roach said as he slowly dabbed away the moisture from the last plate, “the stuff for the camera...I am actually pretty proud of you.”

“I know,” Charlie turned off the tap. “I feel the love, I promise.”

“Let’s not go too far,” Roach sniffed and Charlie laughed. “But I might part with some leftovers. Just this once.”

“I’ll take whatever you’ve got.”

If Charlie went home weighted down with food stuffed into reused takeout containers that was Roach’s business. He’d show his affections in the way he saw fit and if that was in cheese bread and barbecued short rib then so be it. Charlie understood it.

Charlie: Felix says he wants to marry you instead.

Roach: tell I’d rather stick my hand in the garbage disposal

Charlie: you don’t have a garbage disposal

Roach: i would buy one for the express purpose

Charlie: harsh but fair. It was the cheese bread, apparently.

Roach: I’ll send you the recipe. Then you can keep your fakakta fiance.

Charlie: can't’ wait to send you pictures of a burnt pan

Roach: you’ll make them perfectly. Just takes a few times. I know you can be a persistent little asshole when you’re in the mood. Charlie: stop with the praise, I’m blushing so hard I’ll pass out. thnx tho.

#leda house and the kraken verse #ficlet #charlie bonnet #roach feldman

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motownfiction · 1 year ago

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steam

As far as Sam’s concerned, the best Christmas nights are the ones where he gets to stay up with Uncle Roy.

Roy doesn’t spend every Christmas night with them. They usually just see him in the late mornings, when they go to Grandma and Grandpa Brady’s house for brunch. But sometimes, if things get a little boring for him, Roy comes by in the evenings, after dinner, before dessert. Says he’d be a fool to miss out on his big sister’s French silk pies.

But Sam knows it’s for the kids.

Mom and Dad always excuse themselves first. They spend all day working, and by the time the sun goes down, they’ve had it. Charlie tires himself out on the piano. Apparently, a kid can only play “O Come All Ye Faithful” on the piano so many times before he starts to feel like a very special episode. That leaves Sadie, Sam, and Uncle Roy, all up with the TV, watching It’s a Wonderful Life. Sadie eats from a big bowl of popcorn. Sam drinks more hot chocolate than he should be able to handle. Roy does a damn good impression of Jimmy Stewart, which he’s hard pressed to drop once he gets going. When Sam brings him a cookie from the kitchen, he thanks him just like he was really George Bailey.

“Why, thank you, Sammy,” he says after one bite. “You know, nothin’ does an old man good on Christmas night like peanut butter and sugar crystals. Makes ‘im good. Makes ‘im strong. Like when he was just a lad.”

“What old man?” Sadie asks. “You’re thirty-four.”

“That’s old,” Roy says, still not dropping the impression. “When you’re this old, you’ll understand.”

“I think thirty-four is as old as I’ll ever get,” Sam says. “Metaphorically, anyway.”

Roy shakes his head, finally letting go of Jimmy Stewart.

“Oh, please, Sam, don’t,” he says. “Thirty-four is way too old, even metaphorically. People ask you too many questions about why you won’t settle, you’re expected to make a certain amount of money every year, and the words blood pressure will start to mean something you never thought they would before.”

“Hmm,” Sam says. “So, if I’m gonna get to a metaphorical age and stick to it …”

“Nineteen,” Roy says. “It’s nineteen.”

“But what about twenty-one?” Sadie asks. “Don’t most people like to be old enough to order drinks?”

“Most people,” Roy says. “Sam shouldn’t, though. And neither should you, or Charlie, or anybody else you know. Get me?”

Sam nods. He doesn’t know much, but he’s heard a few things about Roy’s drinking habits. Something about when the going gets tough, the Roy gets drinking. That’s what Mom said after a late-night phone call with her little brother a few years back, anyway. She didn’t know Sam was listening, but she should have. If it’s about Uncle Roy, Sam always listens.

“What’s so special about nineteen?” Sam asks.

Roy smiles.

“You’ll figure it out when you get there,” he says. “It’s probably a little different for everybody.”

“I don’t know how I feel about this,” Sadie says.

“What’s the matter, hon?”

“Nineteen seems like a stupid age to be stuck at. I mean … don’t you want maturity? Don’t you want wisdom?”

Sam and Roy look at each other like they’ve understood the same plot all along. It makes Sam feel like he’s flying. Imagine being on the same page as someone as smart as Uncle Roy. It could never been Sammy Slacker, and yet, it always is.

“Sadie, look at me,” Roy says. “Think about everything you know about college freshmen. Now. Do I seem like I’m stuck as one?”

“No,” Sadie says. “You have a clue. More than one, actually.”

“Mmm-hmm. But am I boring? Or do I still get excited about things, even when they seem normal? Or even when they seem dumb?”

“You applauded for a Rankin-Bass special earlier tonight.”

“And I’d do it again. That’s what I mean when I say nineteen. That’s what I think you’re gonna mean when you get there, too. The verve. The verve!”

He walks into the kitchen, probably for no other reason than dramatic effect. Sam laughs. That sounds about right for Roy. He’ll do anything just for the gesture, just to seem grand.

Sam looks across the room at Sadie, through the steam from his hot chocolate.

“Hey, Sadie,” he says.

“What?”

“Uncle Roy’s pretty funny.”

“Of course he is. Do you have a point, or are you just saying things I already know?”

“I have a point. I think I’m kind of funny, too.”

“You’re funnier than I am. That’s for sure.”

“Debatable. But I think … I think I’m a lot like Uncle Roy. And I think … I think when we get older, even more than nineteen, I’m going to be even more like him.”

Sadie laughs, almost like she doesn’t believe Sam. He frowns.

“What’s so funny?” he asks.

“Sam, you have a lot in common with Uncle Roy, but I don’t think you’re going to be just like him,” Sadie says.

“Why not?”

Sadie sighs.

“Well, for starters,” she says, “Uncle Roy is very private. There are things he only knows about himself. I don’t think they’re bad things. I just think he wants to keep them that way.”

“And what about me?”

“As long as I’m around, it’ll never work.”

Sam sighs. He pivots toward the kitchen with the mug of hot chocolate still piping in his hands. Roy comes out of the kitchen, and Sam stares at him through the steam, trying to figure out if Sadie was right.

(part of @nosebleedclub december challenge -- day 5!)

#drabble #writeblr #ch: sam doyle #ch: sadie doyle #ch: roy brady #dynamic: i'll be your mirror #year: 1982

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