#i am desperate and delusional
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is it so much to ask for an exhausted partner to come home from a long day at work and lay on top of me and bury their face in my neck as they begin to sob and sneeze and sneeze and sneeze because theyre so tired from work and on top of it their head is pounding from all the snot thats built up inside them
#snz#snz kink#snz thoughts#sneeze#sneeze kink#snzario#i am desperate and delusional#if someone could just lay on top of me thatd be great#mess#cw mess
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...........slips gege ¥2000
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#jujutsu kaisen art#just lines n tones bc it is wednesday and i am Saving My Energy . gotta take it easy on the right hand lest something Happen#this is my warmup this is my offering this is my manifestation prayer#anyway *looks at tally marks on my bedroom walls* it is day 5673474 of drawing itfs embraces in the hopes that it will happen in canon#call me delusional if u want but ill b the one laughing when these two tackle each other into the most desperate hug later today#tears in eyes clutching at clothes clinging 2 each other with the intention of never letting go etc etc the whole 9#hands and knees gege i BEG pls give me an itfs narrowly-escaped-death reunion hug i am starving.....#ill even sweeten the deal u dont even have to draw it u can just use mine :)#anyway i am tired of pretending i don't think fushiguro Rash Emotional Decisions megumi would be the one 2 kiss yuuji first#argue with a wall <3
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Come on, Marcus. Put Shayne in Culinary Crimes again. Pleaseee 🥺 Not just because I want to see him and Courtney together, but also because my guy knows how to cook. He has a lot of input. 😎
#Smosh won't see this ahah#I am not delusional#this is not satire#this is desperation#smoshblr#culinary crimes#shourtney#shartney#courtney miller#shayne topp
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Freaks (affectionate)
#genshin impact#arledrone#arlecchino#sandrone#hello I am once again forcing you all to look at my favorite delusional rarepair atm and u will like it#I oh so desperately want these two mean and evil women to kiss its insane#it feels like someone has barged into my home and proceeded to beat me with a comically large spoon
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Satoru put your fucking foot down
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#geto suguru#shoko ieiri#I am once again being delusional#todays episode is fake and this is what they��re doing okay yes#playing idk 50cc Mario kart#also this is satorus desperate attempt at flirting with geto#hehehehehehehehe#satosugu
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I am delusional
Joel: Boat boys? Boat boys are gone guys
Also Joel: Etho's first MCC? YES. I can't wait to absolutely destroy washed up Etho at MCC. Like he's so washed, I'm saying this right now I'm team Gem on this. Etho's washed...he's gonna get-I'm going to kill him everytime I see him, I'm targeting him. I'm just kidding, but he did break my trust in the last life series after we had such a nice time together as Boat Boys and...he just...it wasn't the same.
HE'S STILL NOT OVER IT, HE STILL MISSES ETHO. NO ONE CAN TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME, BOAT BOYS ISN'T GONE TILL I SAY THEY'RE GONE.
(sobbing noises)
#smalletho#boat boys#i love them your honor#they're so divorced#they deserve to kill each other#murder is a love language#because i said so#i miss them so bad#you have no idea#i have become to delusional for them#i am so desperate for any interaction between these two#i don't care if it's 10 seconds#anything please i beg#posts-it notes
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oh the unbeatable romantic bond between an obsessive stalker and the guy with a pathological need to feel like the center of the universe at all times
#natterings#zadr#iz posting#i joke but i am actually obsessed with this dynamic#both because it IS hilarious#and in a deeply pathetic way legitimately romantic too#having your most desperate dysfunctional emotional desires fulfilled by the one person who actually WANTS them#someone whose attention you dont have to beg for#someone to whom you are actually as central and significant as you delusionally believe you are#or someone that willingly invites your worst most neurotic tendencies#who plays the game and rewards you for your behavior with exciting spectacle and implicit respect#someone who quite LITERALLY thinks these qualities arent just inoffensive but actively make you better than your whole species#my point is they validate each others egos in the most absurd ways and its beautiful to watch
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okeyyy...i know this acc is preddy much good and dead, rest in peace all my dearly beloved tgcfmdzs mutuals and followers who moved on to smth else in the yrs since mdzs ended, ....but i still have a big enough active audience methinks soooo i wanted 2 promote a korean novel thats REEALLY unappreciated in the eng community ITS SO GOOD its my favourite novel atm and i really want it to catch on w western audiences bcuz i swear it has the potential to be as big as mxtxs novels were if given the opportunity to blow up...
RETURN OF THE MOUNT HUA SECT (aka, officially, RETURN OF THE BLOSSOMING BLADE) is an action, fantasy, comedy korean novel by BIGA on Naver, with a webcomic by STUDIO LICO on Webtoon
THE WEBCOMIC IS CURRENTLY ON BREAK AFTER THE COMPLETION OF ITS FIRST “SEASON” (will be returning sometime mid 2023) AND THE NOVEL IS STILL ON GOING WITH 1494 CHAPTERS (as of 4/15/2023)....if uve read tgcf in its entirety pls dont let that chp count scare you..rotmhs is a very bingeable novel... while rotmhs doesnt have an official english translation, the ongoing fan tl has 379 chapters translated (as of 4/15/2023) [LINKS PROVIDED BELOW]
MY SYNOPSIS: the story follows the main protagonist chung myung, a member of the mount hua sect who was formerly known as the legendary ‘plum blossom sword saint’, reincarnates into the body of a beggar child a hundred years into the future after dying following the beheading of the demonic cult leader, chun ma, who slaughtered his clan members as well as countless other sects during the war. when he wakes, he discovers that his once proud and respected sect has fallen into ruin during the century following its defeat. chung myung, hiding his identity as a fabled hero from the past, rejoins the mount hua sect under the guise of being nothing but a beggar to help restore the mount hua sect to its former greatness while making friends as well as enemies along the way..
the official (webtoon) synopsis:
When Cheongmyeong of the Mount Hua Sect awakens a hundred years in the future, his last memories are of a bloody battle against the Leader of the Demonic Cult, the evil Cheonma. The battle almost saw the end of the Ten Great Sects of ancient China, when Cheongmyeong ended the hard-fought struggle by striking down Cheonma. Soon after, he succumbed to his wounds, filled with regret at their pyrrhic victory. All is not lost, however, as he awakens to his second chance at life. Shocked to find his beloved Mount Hua Sect reduced to a mere shadow of itself in the present day, Cheongmyeong embarks on a journey to restore Mount Hua to its former glory.
while the official synopsis does make it seem like the story is going to be heavy and action focused, the novel itself is more comedic than its led on to be and its action scenes are rlly fun and exhilarating to read..
the main cast are extremely likeable and their relationship w each other is very funny and heartwarming... that being said i feel like if uve come from any of the popular danmei novels and r interested in reading rotmhs (PLEASE BE INTERESTED) i feel like i shuld mention that THERE IS NO ROMANCE IN THIS NOVEL... its not a BL, theres no romantic connotations between any of the main characters, this novel is more focused on found family and the bonds between friends than anything BUT PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT LET THE LACK OF ROMANCE DISSUADE YOU..
AIIISSHH THIS IS GETTING LONG ENOUGH soo basically here are links 2 where u can read ROTMHS please consider reading it PLEASE bc im sick as hell of not having enough fics or fanart of it or ppl to talk to abt it with..feel like im rting art on my priv to brick walls....!!!!!!!!!!
(official) NAVER (1494+ chapters, korean) https://series.naver.com/novel/detail.series?productNo=4130558&isWebtoonAgreePopUp=true
(official) WEBTOON (73 chapters, english) https://www.webtoons.com/en/action/return-of-the-blossoming-blade/list?title_no=2849&page=9
FANTRANSLATION (379+, english) https://skydemonorder.com/projects/return-of-the-mount-hua-sect
one last also before let yall have at it, if u’ve read the webcomic and dont feel like rereading the entire novel up to the webcomic stopping point, jump to chapter 117 on the fantranslation.. chp117 is right where the webcomic leaves off👍
OKAYYY HAVE FUNNNN PLEASE READ RETURN OF THE MOUNT HUA SECT PLEEEASEE SHARE THIS POST W EVERYBODY OR ILL KILL MYSELF IDK YAYYYYY YIPPEEEEE ROTMHS SUPREMACY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if u do end up reading and liking it please god..talk to me about it..... im literally shaking scratching my neck rocking in a corner crying sobbing sniffling snotting
#PINNED POST#PLEASE GIVE IT A SHOT IM BEGGING YALL...IVE FALLEN TO MY KNEES AND AM GRASPING YALLS PANTS BEGGING#ive never done a novel promotion before so i think yall can tell how desperate the situation is..#tagging this w mxtx tags so it reaches a broader audience yes im being annoying idgaf just read this stupid fucking novel already#화산귀환#華山歸還#return of the mount hua sect#rotmhs#return of the blossoming blade#rotbb#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#tgcf#tian guang ci fu#墨香铜臭#天官赐福#svsss#人渣反派自救系统#if this flops ill drive myself into a river and yall'll never see or hear from me again#wrote this all at once in a delusional trance in under 30mins so ill go back and fix this and make it a little more coherent in the future..
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oh Wait A Second
Hang The Fuck On
Ive Got Another Thing Actually my beloved eloise Also came up with the dumbass plan to claim to be whistledown when she was backed into a corner by the queen it was a stupid plan then same as it was for cressida
the difference being eloise was confiding unwittingly To whistledown who immediately did everything in her power to shut that shit down for obvious reasons
ELOISE WAS IN DAMN NEAR THE SAME POSITION AS CRESSIDA WAS
at least in terms of personal desperation and impending doom closing in like for the love of fuck no one else could have possibly been in a better position to if not help then at the very Least EMPATHIZE
if everything went exactly as it had but *before* the dropping of the 'friendship soured' Out of Nowhere eloise had tried to comfort or reason with cressida Especially from this VERY RIDICULOUSLY SPECIFIC AND NICHE common thread but nuture and fear won out and cressida still went ahead with her ill-advised gambit?
and their friendship imploded accordingly
I would Not be nearly as annoyed as I am now because hey I like angst WHEN ITS GOOD STORYTELLING like damn
IT WAS RIGHT THERE Y'ALL ELOISE LITERALLY EXPERIENCED IT SHE HAD THE SAME THOUGHT WHY DID NO ONE USE THAT
#cressida cowper#im im y'all what#why#the more i sit here thinking about the less sense it all makes#i think maybe eloise is so bad at reading people that she thought#cressidas desperate attempt at finding a silver lining was geninue#and she just wrote her off in that moment#in my more delusional shipping mode i like to think my oblivious little babydyke el#heard cressida talking about this marriage with FEIGNED enthusiam and her heartbroke#like you can see in her eyes that shes trying to put on a brave face to smile through the horror of what cress is actually saying#and it hurts so much in a way she cannot quantify or understand#so she does the simplest thing a removes the source of it cressida#and then she reconciles with pen#and so she once again is not alone#and i think once she has the space and the quiet away she may start to feel the pain of cressida's absence just as keenly#as her presence just out of reach#and i want to be clear here i am not hating on eloise#i love eloise#i do however wanna meet some of these writers in a denny's parking#c'mon i just wanna talk#cressida x eloise#bridgerton spoilers
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i am so romantic rn, i need to kiss a girl and tuck a hair behind her ear and poorly flirt with her and dance in the middle of the street with her and overexaggerate my compliments and hype her up and make her feel like the prettiest girl in the world and write her little notes in her lunch and do her makeup and cuddle her asleep and watch her and love her and ahhh
#god strike me down#i am desperate#i am delusional#i am needy#i want to kiss a woman so bad its not funny#wlw yearning#wlw#nblw#sapphic yearning#sapphic#lesbian#queer#lesbian yearning
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#hey like. not to be really annoying i shouldn't be doing this aged 32 but i'm really struggling#every time the weather gets cold i feel like i am entering winter with more and more despair#i am really struggling this time#every day is a struggle to get through#i'm losing my hair#i'm losing my reasons to live#i keep putting on a full face of makeup and clothes in my room at like 2am just to desperately try to feel human#i keep saying i don't know if I'll survive the winter and people keep laughing but I don't mean it as a joke#i'm sadder than i've ever been and everything feels like it's falling apart#whenever i get the chance to confide this in people i get told that i'm strong and i'm a survivor#and that i should do some shit to make me happy#and yea i can stave it all off for a few minutes with like a trip out or some makeup or something but it all feels like bandaids#for a serious wound that's going to go septic soon#like this isn't a way to live a life#i don't want to 'be strong' or a 'survivor' anymore i want to be fucking happy#i'm tired and promises of brief happiness between ever worsening pain feel almost patronizing at this point#i woke up the other day in the middle of the night and as soon as conscious thoughts hit my brain i almost doubled over#if i had been not on the first floor i think i might have jumped then and there#i want to be loved and feel like my love is worth something#i want a clean apartment of my own and a career that doesn't feel like it's designed to kill me#i'm 32 and still essentially feel like i'm living my life like a teenager#i want sun and suncatchers and healthy plants and a wardrobe that fits my clothes#and i want the will to actually get up in the morning#i endured all of this for so long on a delusional belief that things were going to magically get better#but i realize now they won't#i became aware of the bounds of my cage with no means of escaping them#i'm sick of living each day oscillating between numbness and grief i can barely eat i can barely work i can barely laugh#and no one's coming to save me#i'm agonized by the idea that this is maybe what life always is for everybody#is this how it's supposed to be
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i hate that i crave such an intense love, and crave attention so badly that i literally FALL for men who DO NOT EXIST. my mind is consumed with Haidyn Reeves right now and it hurts my soul, same with Ryat Archer… really all of them but those two men… phew. i’d sell my damn soul to have them😭 @drewstarkeyslut you get me😭
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And back to JJK. Demon slayer? Unfinished anime and how I got into anime..
This is just pure dumb stuff, randomness, and even cringe stuff thrown here, so feel free to skip!
For starters, JJK was one of my first animes. I had been dying to watch it, but I could not watch it because my brother was against it. But eventually, I did watch every episode until the Shibuya arc, and after that, I stopped because there would be too much violence and all that.
This led to my biggest mistake: starting anime and watching spoilers
Spoilers
Naruto was actually my first anime, and I binge-watched so many episodes at once and cried so much. It was super fun, and I even watched so many fillers, but my brother eventually said that season 2 of the series has too much of a serious tone and did not let me. So, what did I do?
Spoil the whole damn anime for me
And then finally, I was going to watch. I watched about another 200 episodes, and then that was the end of my Naruto saga. I know what happens in the war: Boruto, Naruto marrying Hinata, and all the Akatsuki backstory, so I just gave up.
And the same happened with JJK. I saw way too many spoilers, and I still watch the later chapter spoilers too; even JJK ended with me.
I was just going to start the manga from the Shibuya arc yesterday, but then I started Demon Slayer, which I also know the ending of.
The reason I am so into Windbreaker, Kaiju No. 8, Sakamoto Days, Spyx Family, the Millionaire Detective, Buddy Daddies, and even Gakuen Babysitters is because I did watch any spoilers for them.
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The reason I even got into Quotev, or my first app where I read fanfiction,.
I had an obsession with Yuta from JJK, now that I think about it. I cannot help it; he is just too good, but writing fics about him is kind of awkward to me because of Rika.
It was from my grandmother's phone that I read my first anime fanfiction, It's Pure Love by Whale Crumpet. If you want a good Yuta fic, I would totally say to try this one out, but the author hasn't updated it since 2022, and I feel my heart breaking. Even though they said they would return to quotev, they never did.
The Yuta fic I loved the most was Cupid's Cursed Arrow by Strawberry Belle. Damn, did I fall hard for this fic. I would tell everyone in my house that Cupid's arrow was updated as I read it; it would give me giggles each time. That fic also hasn't been updated for 5 months.
Honestly I am not a sucker for crossover manga. It has to be super specific to my liking but Euphoria by Sceretstarlight was just too cute. Made me fall harder. Even the author of that fic on quotev is like the real life version of Mitsuri. I love her a lot♥️♥️
It was then a random day where I suddenly got an idea to write a Yuta fic, and I wrote it, rewrote it again, and the rewritten one has ten chapters in my notebooks, which I still have for the memories. I did read it a while ago, and it was terrible, but I had no freaking experience, so what can I do for that?
If anyone does want to read and give me some opinions on that chapter 1, I did upload it in my random ideas thrown here as a quote. You can read that here.
The only original story I have made is Lost in Dreams, which is again on quotev.
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And for Tumblr, I clicked on the website once and was reading what I thought was a Yuta period cramp comfort, but it required me to sign up and all, so after a while, I did do that, but that fic was a Yuta vampire smut fic, and I ended up not liking it.
I just read fics, I have no idea how to make my own blog, about tags, dashboard, you could follow people and even like there works.
One thing I do know is I had a Sung jinwoo fic reading obsession like I loved reading about him okay. The first Jinwoo fic that stole my heart was by @catboyfics. Hunter is a series and it was the first Jinwoo fic I read and was so so in love with. It was my first non JJK fic I read and it felt different than the others if you know what I mean. I didn't understand how to save or like a fic on tumblr so I lost it and I was super devastated truly I was super duper upset and sad that I spent what 2 hours searching the Jinwoo tag on tumblr and when I did not find it I could have even started crying BUT I found it again and I saved the upload in my folder where I can easily read it and also followed catboyfics. I hope they are alright because they haven't been/ updated their blog in 2 months.. I also have no memory on how I got to know about tumblr but now it is my most used website..
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That is the current problem with JJK fics, imo; the tags and stories are just almost pure shit. I am not saying bad to the writers; they have fun and they do what they want to do, but seriously, we need more JJK fluff, comfort, taking care of female readers, and overprotective fics. I just stated what I like, but whatever.
I have so much to write, but will I write that? No
Will I write dumb, stupid, and nonsenseful things? YEAH
I feel so stupid writing this but whatever let me rant/write random things for compensation for this horrible day
#ikaiju number 8#kn8#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuta okkotsu#sakamoto days#anime#i am not okay#okay#i just#i am so delusional#i am so dumb#i am so desperate#totallybakedcake#wind breaker#manga#jjk x reader#jujutsu sorcerer#rant post#personal rant#this is so stupid#demon slayer#hashira#kny#kimetsu no yaiba#tanjiro kamado#nezuko kamado#demon slayer nezuko#Totally caked talks
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If Shayne ever does a "Guess My Co-workers Based on their Childhood Photos" video, he will have the privilege of meeting this little cutie. 🥺💚💙
#dont mind it#dont mind my rambling#i am not delusional#this is not satire#this is desperation#shourtney#shartney#courtney miller#shayne topp#smosh#smoshblr#smosh games#shayne guesses
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are those scales-like details on Zhongli's godly outfit? goodness. i feel so Normal about this
#this is an Encanto corn plate tweet moment kinda#but i'm taking this as a SMALL dragonfucker win#because i am desperate and delusional#when are we getting actual dragon Zhongli content from Hoyoverse so i don't get pathetic over CRUMBS#is the exuvia all we're gonna get?? am i supposed to live like this????#zhongli#🔶#3
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you know stray kids? Has anyone made the joke about being stray and needing an owner (chan) yet? If not, I've now officially made that joke.
I'm just down bad. Also delulu. Someone help me (chan preferably. Someone got his number to share?)
#i am only half joking#life has been so fucking difficult and I'm more desperate than I've always been#would move across the world if that man asked me to#just feels like he'd be exactly what i need idk#i am delusional help#he's just so daddy in exactly the way i need#mental illness is kicking#stray kids#do i really wanna tag this. idk. fuck it.#skz#skz chan#stray kids chan#bang chan
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