#i am alive once again
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long time no see
#💊🩺 ;; my silly doodles#i am alive once again#probably#if i dont post for a while again... i promise it won't last over a month like i did#apologies#hlvrai#half life but the ai is self aware#hlvrai benrey#benrey hlvrai#benrey#hlvrai benry#hlvrai fanart#spooky scary skeletons.....
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I had a big today… I’m not sorry it will happen again
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where are all my bucket head hoes at??
#that trailer revived me#I am alive once again#can’t wait to see all the different mandos#I love all bucket heads but paz is the favorite#the mandalorian
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day 30 - videogame (undertale, fnaf, etc)
somebody get this man some chapstick
#(voice of a guy who’s desperately trying to not give in and watch the movie for the third time in a row) So how’s everyone doing#i haven’t drawn mike in like 5 months this is simply unacceptable. unsustainable#he could fix everything that’s wrong with the world#i have once again changed his design but it’s ok#but yeah as you can see i am very interested with the concept of mike adjusting to living in human society as a weird alive corpse thing#fuuuuckkk AUEJGHHHH i seriously do like movie mike so much i think he and game mike can live in peace and harmony#something so awful is happening to me and it’s past midnight i should NOT be allowed to think aboht my favorite characters#myart#cringetober 2023#michael afton#mike schmidt#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#can anybody hear me. help. help. MICHAELLLL DONT LEAVE ME HERE UEHGH OUGH MICHAELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
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more flayer trazyns i never posted hehee oops..
#trazyn the infinite#orikan the diviner#the infinite and the divine#warhammer 40k#flayer trazyn au#ermmmmm once again debating should i even tag this#what is with orikan and his manic pixie dream girlfriends who literally wind up almost eating him alive#yeah. and of course orikan would act like a smug little shithead about the state trazyn succumbs to#but like. you are still whipped so who is actually winning orikan.#dip art#im sorry i am always at peak insanity about them.
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: ) Kiss kiss fall in love
#hello...i am alive. once again.#dead by daylight#dwight fairfield#jake park#i just want them to b happy...
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‘the children yearn for the mines’ is a little too real to me bc when i was a kid and my older siblings were trying to get me into pokémon i really never cared to try playing. BUT. i was obsessed with the underground mining minigame in dppt. i used to beg my sister to let me take a turn playing and set it up for me bc i didn’t know how to so i could go mine for gems nonstop until i cleared that entire cave section of glittering wall spots which always made me so sad bc i was having such a great time. i didn’t even understand the significance of what i was doing but 7 year old me was high off of it
#years and years later when i actually played platinum myself and it hit me like OH this is the game with the mining thing!!!#you have no idea how happy i was#…and also sad. it made me kinda heartsick bc in my childhood nostalgia dreams#my brother and sister used to play online together and do capture the flag#and their little minigame battles in the underground with their cool secret bases were so fun to watch#like that was back when the wifi connection was working and the games were alive and relevant#but i came back to it far far too late. when it was a mere relic and i was alone with no other players#still. hearing the music again brought a smile to my face#pokémon#dppt#i am once again rambling about my very special relationship to sinnoh#i didn’t play pokémon as a kid but also yes i did it was part of my childhood. like without really knowing much about it#the lil character sprites. hearthome city theme#the contests#the crunchy sound of the map opening#and the incomprehensible map itself#the bike and surf music#empoleon and staravia’s cries as they went to use surf and fly#truly. being a younger sibling watching your older sibling play has such an impact on you#it’s all nostalgic to me too i just didn’t know the full context of it myself back then#couple all this with the weird feeling of having played pokémon legends arceus as my first own game#and THEN going and finally checking out dppt#it was like double nostalgia. two different half-nostakgia experiences#just. agh i make fun of gen 4 for a lot of things but it is fundamentally my heart isn’t it#i also literally am incapable of talking about it for more than 5 minutes without bringing pla into it lol#pokeposting
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Bones doing god’s work
#art#fanart#star trek#star trek tos#star trek fanart#star trek art#bones mccoy#leonard mccoy#leonard bones mccoy#star trek mccoy#tos star trek#tos#star trek the original series#tos fanart#star trek tos fanart#tos mccoy#digital fanart#digital drawing#sketchy sketchy#just sketches#i have arted once again#i am alive#no way#polart
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i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc
#what am i trying to say here?#idk! think about all of the pieces you have#dying is complicated in ohtori in countless different ways#and i find it boring to see so much ‘this character is dead and that’s it’ stuff#when death is used farrrrrrr more figuratively than some ppl give credit for#and i think the movie too does wonderful things with death#and what ‘dying’ really means#being disbelieved. being forgotten. being rejected. haunting despite this#much more interesting to think about wrt commentary on abusive relationships than it is#to think about what?? oh me when my brother died but plot twist he’s alive and can walk on this road all cool. like?????#akio doesn’t have the power to make himself revenant#he THINKS he does and he absolutely has power when he’s alive and he imbues that power with such meaning that it does live on after him#but ANTHY. anthy is the one struggling with herself and her feelings and the impact of trauma and abuse (that power!!) in aou#he’s dead? he died? she brought him back through her memories? or she’s left him (metaphorical death) and he’s haunting her??#all such interesting interpretations#i haven’t mentioned touga bc i don’t have the energy today. if dead and just illusion of others memories then why active. why awful#like in aou akio is only Obviously scummy when he’s alive. his illusory self is based upon anthy’s love for him#if anime!touga is nothing more than nanami/whoever’s memories of him before he died……. why does he actively choose to suck again and again#like nanami wouldn’t do that. unless it was meant to be a subconscious thing like ooo he’s dead all along but that’s not what her arc is#it’s not ‘he’s been dead all along’ literally or figuratively. it’s ‘he’s unsafe and i don’t want him’#sigh. once again i am asking people to think about nanami and touga’s dynamic through touga’s eyes#it’s so interesting to me how people forget to consider his motivations or feelings on ANYTHING#like sure his motivations and feelings are scummy but they’re interesting!!!!! they intrigue me!!!!#compel me even#anyway ignore how i said i didn’t have the energy for this and then typed it all out anyway#dais.txt
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Not trying to start anything but is there a reason why you want Yuuji to have kept his injuries so badly? /gen
a ! part of it is the fact that I spent so long figuring out how I wanted to implement yuuji's scars into the way I draw him, n now to have had all that effort be for naught is salt in the non-existent wound :'> there were so many of them that I was pretty proud of myself when I settled on something I was happy with,,,, not to mention they looked so cool cries i was ROBBED
but even from a non-petty non-aesthetic standpoint i have some thoughts on why i think yuuji should have kept the scars. SPECIFICALLY the right eye injury. don't get me wrong megumi having the facial scars that echo sukuna's mask does look cool it's nice and angsty he looks good i do Like it. HOWEVER. i think from a narrative standpoint, to have Yuuji be the one to lose the right eye or have a significant scar in that spot would have been Better visual storytelling. Not only does yuuji spend more time as sukuna's vessel comparatively but Yuuji as sukuna's vessel n foil is SUCH a key plot point (mans literally says "you are me" like>?>??????????) n i feel like the scars n what they represent in that regard are better suited to him. family resemblance if u will.
ik this isn't rly taking into account megumi's torso scars but personally i got no beef with those I think they make sense. he was punched out of sukuna, obv that's gonna leave a mark . "but by that logic couldn't you make the same argument for why megumi keeps the facial scars?", I hear you ask. and to that i say you /could/ but imo megumi's torso scars also carry a symbolism that makes it Meaningful fr him to have them. i'm mostly thinking here about yuuji being better able to Suppress sukuna's true form whereas megumi Couldn't and him having to wear the reminder on his body as a result. at the end of the day though my main gripe really just boils down to the fact that not only does megumi end up with /more/ sukuna-related scars than yuuji, but Yuuji straight up loses /All/ of his. As far as we know he has none now and that's SUCH a shame imo.
I think if megumi were to keep the torso scars + slits where the second eyes used to be (+ some other misc LEFT SIDE facial scars from the fight w gojo and the jacob's ladder attack), with Yuuji instead being the one to sustain the main right eye injury as a visual reminder of sukuna, that would be ideal for Me. Have megumi be an echo of the body, have yuuji be an echo of the face. That way there's good symbolism - the size/placement of their marks better corresponds 2 the nature of the time they spent as vessels + the weight of their respective relationships with sukuna. simple, effective, matching angsty bfs. AND they get to look at themselves and each other and be riddled with intense soul crushing guilt!!!!!
anyway scarred!megu nation we won but scarred!yuuji nation suffered for it and i'm not going to take that slight lying down.
#answered#DID NOT MEAN TO YAP THAT MUCH GOMEN#i didnt realize how much i actually had to say#but then i got going and thought oh im Really pissed off abt this actually huh#once again gotta do everything myself in this household smh#god put me on this earth to draw and i am going to give my favourite characters the bodily trauma they deserve.#gege if youre listening thank u fr keeping them alive im not actually mad-mad im just salty pls don't do anything drastic#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers
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Outta the way I’ve got hot takes coming through!!!!!!
Dick doesn’t resent Jason pre-death: I have found no evidence to support this. He definitely has issues with Bruce but Dick taking his anger out on Jason is so ooc. I think they were never super close though, partially because Dick wasn’t around much and Jason wasn’t around that long.
The Joker Jr of it all: I honest to god don’t know how I feel about this. On the one hand if Joker Jr had had a bigger impact on canon I really would have liked the dynamic it would create and how the Batfamily would react to Tim. On the other hand this absolutely could never happen because Batman would go full serial killer at that point. I personally think Joker Jr was the best version of Arkham Knight/Dick being mind controlled by the Joker.
Damian Wayne is an asshole: Yeah I went there. I’m throwing your Cherubic God King on the pyre and what will any of you do to stop me?! I understand Damian needing a lot of time to adjust and going through an immense level of trauma but like guess what he is still a jerk. I totally hate that he so rarely gets just brutally humbled in canon. Like their is the time he picks a fight with Jason and just gets absolutely bodied and he tries to fight previously mentioned mind controlled Dick and also gets rekt. But I swear he is way to arrogant for someone who gets clapped by like every other character.
NO ONE WOULD EVER WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ANY OF THE BATS EVER IRL: Yup it’s time to address the elephant in the room. All of the Bats with the exception of Cassandra who has never done anything wrong in her life and maybe Barbara if you close your eyes and ears, are terrible people.
Bruce Wayne: Look I could forgive helping old ladies while dressed up as a furry, I could over look being an emotional nightmare, I could even see why he didn’t murder the joker. But I cannot forgive his greatest sin. Being a fucking BILLIONAIRE.
Tim: Emotionally manipulative, a liar, has zero respect for other’s boundaries, also a billionaire, no fashion sense. He is that emo boy in a coffee shop who you think is deep but he is just stoned as hell and will ruin your credit.
Jason Todd: It’s the child murder for me, It’s the being an actual drug lord for me, it’s the duffel bag of severed heads for me. Truthfully those things are iconic, but this man is PTSD ridden and armed to the teeth with guns. I would get up to get a glass of water at night, sneeze and then Stable Mabel would blow my head off.
Dick Grayson: That friend who is never okay. Dating him would be like dating any generically attractive boy in college, yeah he’s hot but the eating disorder and body dysmorphia are reaching a turning point. Have you ever met a college gymnast? I don’t think he would be as gross but like he is a cop so if his friend assaulted someone he definitely wouldn’t tell anyone about it. I feel like he would gaslight me into breaking up with him only for his jackass to show up on my doorstep at 3am sopping wet. Also he’s a circus kid, that is a theater kid with talent and no shame. He would be so fucking annoying, like you would be embarrassed to be seen with him.
#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#jason todd#batfam#damian wayne#dc batman#tim drake#nightwing#red hood#I’m roasting them alive because I love them#come for me#tweet your snake emojis#I say bring it Brenda#I’m not even a little sorry#dc writers i am once again asking you to meet me in the deney’s parking lot
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#paul mccartney#macca#MCBEARDY#girlies we are so back#no idea where this was shot or by whom#but good job this pic is insane#can’t believe I’m using this tag for old man Paul but#you look good with you hair pulled back Paul#the best look is back. I am alive once more#please Paul never shave again I am begging you on my knees
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TODAY IS REINER'S BIRTHDAY. I WILL POST ART COMMISSIONS LATER.
But for now, here is a photo of the cake that Niji Desserts made for Reiner's birthday:
#kei's mumblings#Hi#once again#I am alive#Reiner Day 2024#Happy Birthday#Reiner Braun#Reiner#aot#snk#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#my melody#sanrio
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This court finds the Defendant, Inspector Javert...
GUILTY
#les mis#les miserables#les miserables fanart#my art#javert#inspector javert#hello I am alive once again#I missed drawing him#what a stress reliever to put your meow meow into bountiful mounts of stress <3
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I have no new art as always except maybe this drawpile doodle of quark that I like. Hi. And goodbye I guess if I disappear for another month or two.
#art#Tagging archival purposes this is more just a ‘Hey! How are you! I’m alive!’ post while life beats my ass once again.#I am trying desperately to have some time to do some comics or stuff but I’m also my own biggest hater so it has not been working well!#I say this to everyone though if you have the time and you want to create something you should do it no matter what….#You will enjoy life much more if you are creating methinks.#Anyways uhhh see ya. I have projects I need to do. I will try my best to have a post again soon 💔
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Ignore if you don’t want to read about me being stupid once again
#pls dont read if you cant handle venting and whining#once again i am here to say that i am the loneliest person alive and i feel like i can’t grasp the basic consept of friendship and do it lol#like idk how to be friends#i feel like i will forever be sad and lonely#and i know everyone will say you can talk to me and i know that but i’ve just been by myself for so long that i don’t remember how to have#actual conversations with people i feel like i am disconnected from reality#i feel like i am an extremely unlikeable person and that’s why i was all alone in highschool and idk i am oversharing on the internet again#because it’s the only place i kind of feel safe doing it#pls take care of yourselves first before comfoting me or anything im sorry i sound very pathetic#how do i start living again#how does one live anyway#im just in my head all the time#this was supposed to be hot girl summer but it’s once again summertime sadness#im so stupid!!!#im so anxious and depressed that i dont know what to do with myself#im so sorry for oversharing i have a therapist dont worry im kind of taking care of myself#but the eternal loneliness just wont let me go#idk how to be a person anymore#i’m just sad#thinking of going to a church and pretend to be a believer so i could have a community again lol
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