#i am a relaxed and cultured woman now

[domirine]

spent a lovely week with friends by the lake 💚

[cator99]

out of curiosity, would you consider yourself butch?

used to be a blonde underweight twink and now I'm a based jock still got the chanel bag and the sick albeit matured mind of a suckpig to prove it so I'm gonna let you decide whether you wanna call me that word just cuz I got a pussy and short hair. I promise you that there have been enough advancements made in the art of lesbian sexual dynamics in the past 50 years to broaden the vocabulary used to describe the plethora of types of masculine females.

[moonlightcycle571]

The Pros Of Being Omni-Lingual

Saw a while back someone saying Captain Marvel (or Shazam or Captain Thunder or whatever name you choose for him) is omni-lingual. I have no idea if it’s actually cannon, but it lives rent free in my head, and I got no plans of evicting it any time soon.

But anyways, the reasoning makes sense. He got his powers from The Wizard, to be The Champion of Magic, so it makes sense that among his other powers, he’s got all the languages down. And that works in his favour when connecting with Heroes

In general, people are more relaxed and open when speaking in their mother tongue, and with Cap knowing all the language cause of ✨magic✨, no one can blame him for knowing even the most top secret and heavily guarded languages (like Themisquiran, Atlanlantian or other).

See, when someone like Batman or Martian Manhunter speaks to you in your native language, it’s intimidating. When another JL member does it, it’s a pleasant surprise, but you can sense they aren’t that comfy with a language also do it for work purposes.

But when Cap does it? It’s “oh you speak …” “oh, I’m omni-lingual” type dialogue. If he gets a cult after mentioning that it was a gift from the Gods, then that’s a while other story

Pair that with his sunny attitude, and his golden retriever attitude, of course he gets people to like him. He’ll understand all the memes, have fantastic insight (Wisdom of Solomon) and political views (Whiz Kid radio host). To put it blankly, he has amazing conversational skills, and I am convinced that discussions can be the most meme filled talks or the most profound stuff you have ever heard, especially if it’s about Magic.

To get back on topic, these facts make him especially loved, not just by civilians he saves (head cannon that he knows what’s your preferred language of you speak more than one and reassures them in that language), but also by other heroes.

He can be seen with Martian Manhunter and Miss Martian (speaking Martian) while helping them cook some food from their home world.

Or with Supergirl in the lounge Kryptonian (Kal is great and all, as are the other supers, but Kryptonian is not their first language, not like her).

Or with Aquaman, talking about various Sea Gods in Atlantian. Whenever he’s got some Magical duties in Atlantis for whatever reason, he always gets invited for dinner with the Aquafam. He, Mera and Gar have the best Magic discussions

He tries to avoid speaking Themesciran, cause he’s a guy and he doesn’t want to disrespect their culture, but Wonder Woman is always more relaxed when speaking in her mother tongue. Most of the time, he will settle for Greek though (it’s her second language so it’s close enough). Although he did take it upon himself to teach Cassie when Diana couldn’t

For any of the Batfam, he switches languages, every other sentence. They love it, especially Bruce, Dick and surprisingly Alfred. It’s enrichment and tests their knowledge. When Clark and Diana aren’t here and his kids are in the watch tower, they go to the Captain to help with their language education (they don’t know he’s a kid, which makes Billy think he’s adulting right). Later when it was revealed he’s a kid, it makes the JL groan that a child was the better designated Baby Sitter (now Batman sends his kids in to hopefully adopt Billy)

When meeting new heroes, it’s the same shabang. He can instantly acclimatise to them and is just a walking talking Pitbull (looks scary, is a sweetie pie)

The lantern corps love him, and keeps sending him rings. My guy has to give the GLs a bad full of rings before every meeting (although they do wonder why there’s the a red, and sometimes yellow rings in the bag). holy shit I need to make a post about lantern corp and Captain marvel

But anyways, that’s just me ranting as someone who was raised bilingual and who definitely prefers English.

[harunayuuka2060]

Twst Unveil Event Part 2

*In the Mirror Chamber*

*Yuurin, Jack, Ruggie, Malleus, Silver, Sebek, Rook, Epel, Floyd, and Jade are already there.*

Malleus: Seems that everyone is here.

Sebek: It's a pleasure for us to be in a trip with you, Waka-sama!

Malleus: Yes. Thanks to Yuurin who graciously invited me.

Yuurin: Don't mention it, Malleus-senpai.

Ruggie: Um, Rook? Is that a camera?

Rook: Oui!

Jack: Why?

Rook: To take photos of Monsieur Tranquille, of course!

Ruggie: ...

Ruggie: No, Rook. That's our job.

Jack: Yes. We need to update Leona-senpai every hour.

Epel: When did Leona-senpai become such a worrywart?

Floyd: Ne~ Ne~ Damselfish~ Are we going to have a sleepover~?

Yuurin: Yes. I believe so.

Floyd: You can share a bed with me and Jade~. You'll be our pillow~.

Silver: You can't.

Floyd: Eh~ Why not~?

Jade: Is there a problem, Silver?

Silver: Yuurin needs a good night's rest.

Jade: Ah, now that makes sense. *chuckles*

Floyd: Eh~? But I sleep like a baby lamb~.

Them except Yuurin: We all know that's a lie.

Yuurin: It's time for us to go.

Yuurin: We have arrived.

*The fresh breeze immediately welcomes them.*

Them: *sigh in contentment*

Jade: I like this place. *chuckles*

Silver: It feels like a good place to sleep in...

Sebek: Silver! Don't fall asleep!

Yuurin: I'm glad you find the place relaxing.

Yuurin: Though it's good while it lasts.

Jack: Hm? What do you mean by that, Yuurin?

Yuurin: Here she comes.

*The ground started shaking*

Epel: Eh— Are we having an earthquake?!

Yuurin: No.

"YUURIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Them: Huh?

*A giant buff woman comes charging at them; or more likely towards Yuurin.*

Yuurin: Good morning, Philomela.

Them: That's... PHILOMELA?!!

Ruggie: Yuurin! Move aside!

Philomela: YUUURIN! *sweeps her off her feet and gives her a big, tight hug*

Philomela: Oh look at you!

Yuurin: How are you, Philomela?

Philomela: I am doing GREAT! *laughs*

Them: ...

Philomela: Oh. And these are your schoolmates, no?

Philomela: They look promising!

Them: *all of them smiles*

Yuurin: Philomela, can you put me down?

Philomela: Ah, yes, yes. Of course.

Floyd: Wow. She's as huge as a whale.

Epel: What the— Why would you say that?!

Philomela: A WHALE?!

Philomela: Did you hear that, Yuurin? He called me a whale!

Yuurin: Yes. I heard it loud and clear, Philomela.

Silver: She looks happy. Was that a compliment?

Yuurin: Yes. The best one at that.

The others: Oh...

Ruggie: *mutters* Wow. If it were in any other places...

Jack: *mutters too* You would have been slapped.

Philomela: Have a tour of the place while I assist the other schools.

Yuurin: ...

Yuurin: Didn't you say no one wanted to participate?

Philomela: Well, after making an announcement that Night Raven College will join, different schools have shown their interests.

Yuurin: ...

Yuurin: I see. In that case, we will see you later.

Philomela: *takes her leave*

Floyd: So~ What should we do now~?

Malleus: I want to hear the beliefs and culture of this place.

Yuurin: There are tons of them.

Rook: Can you give us an example?

Yuurin: Hmm...

Yuurin: If you happen to lock eyes with an animal and it starts to approach you, run.

Epel: Huh? But why?

Jack: Is it because it's attacking you?

Yuurin: No. It means a god has taken a liking on you.

Them: ...

Rook: And why is that a problem, Monsieur Tranquille?

Yuurin: Kingdom of Heroes have records of wars and long-time disputes just for this very reason.

Ruggie: Yikes.

Floyd: Oh...

Floyd: There's a bald eagle staring at Guppy right now.

Epel: ...

Malleus: You are being liked by a god.

Yuurin: Oh. A bald eagle.

Yuurin: That's not good.

Epel: *panic noises*

*Later, Yuurin has to convince Epel that it was only a myth to stop him from crying*

Leona: How is everything there?

Yuurin: Not a problem so far.

Leona: Good. That's all I have to say. I'll hang up now. *ends the call*

Ruggie and Jack: ...

Ruggie: In 3... 2... 1...

Ruggie: *Leona is calling him*

Ruggie: *answers*

Leona: No sleeping in the same bed.

Ruggie: Yes, boss. Copy. *then Leona hangs up*

Jack: Aren't we sharing beds already?

Ruggie: Shh. You're going to attract the strict brother energy, Jack.

[readychilledwine]

Crush

Summary - Deciding to take a yoga class may have been the best decision you've ever made

Warnings - plus size reader, discussions of gym culture and health

A/n - fic 3 for @cassianappreciationweek day 7! We get NSFW from here 💕

🗡Cassian Masterlist🗡Master Masterlist🗡

The clang of weights was almost as annoying as the front desk girl staring at you. You hated gyms, hated the judgment that came with walking into one, hated the way people stared at you as if you weren't the ideal person to actually be at a place for improving yourself. 

“Look,” you interrupted her politely, “I am fully aware I am paying more to take this class because I don't have a membership. Considering I'm just trying out this fitness thing, not really interested in spending $100 a month just then also pay $80 for the one class I'm interested in taking.” Her smiled dropped slightly as she just nodded and took your card, finishing your sign up for the yoga course you and 3 of your closest friends were trying. 

You knew she was just trying to meet her numbers, but it was something from gym culture you hated. The constant pushing to join their cult and have access to “everything” instead of just being able to pay for the classes you were interested in was crazy to you. The way gym culture pushed looking a certain way to be considered healthy and attractive also bothered you greatly. 

Health had to do with more than just the numbers on the scales. It had to do with your mind, your soul, and that was what you were here to work. Your mind and soul, and if you happened to gain some muscle strength from yoga, that was just an added bonus. You were all wanting to try yoga as a form of stress relief, relaxation, and self care.  No pressure, no expectations, just fun. 

The four of you were all laughing as you headed into the gym, not even bothering to stop and look at anyone or anything going on. In your mind, it was just a scene you'd watched hundreds of times. Ripped men showing off their muscles, gym girls vlogging their “workouts” in outfits you never would be caught wearing. You were here for you, not for the show someone thought they could put on for you.

Cassian was in a squat rack, watching you through the mirror as he stood with weights resting on his wide shoulders. You were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Every curve, every strand of hair. You were perfect in his eyes. Rhys followed his glance before grinning, “That's my assistant. Y/n!” 

You glanced up, instantly waving at Rhys and he waved back. He motioned for you to come over, “Hello, darling. What brings you here?”

“Yoga,” you shrugged. “Trying it for stress relief. Mean boss and all!” 

Rhysand laughed at your response, eyes sparkling, “You brought water?” You nodded to him. “Good, that room gets way too hot. I admire the yoga classes, but I can't do it. Oh! By the way,” he motioned to Cassian, “this is my brother, Cassian. You know Az from security.”

And that's when it began.

Two months. Two long months of you and Cassian trading no more than your names, smiles, and slightly flirtatious banter and digs at each other when you would cross paths at the water fountain. 

Today was his day, though. Today he'd finally ask if you wanted him to help you workout, and if you said no, he'd offer dinner instead. Rhys had been forced into telling him every detail of your life. He knew your favorite color, food, how you took coffee. He felt like he knew about you, but now he truly needed to know you.

He needed more than glances that left you blushing. Needed more than you making him go home and spend his night staring at the ceiling in his empty bed wondering if you liked him the way he liked you.

Today was his day. He knew it as he kept glancing at you.

Two months had sucked you into your own version of gym culture, and while your goal was still more the stress relief, you had to admit it was fun watching your booty get even better. You had to also admit deep down that you had other reasons for coming to the gym outside of yoga class, though. That reason was 6’5”, dark curly hair, swirling tribal tattoos, and looking oh so delicious in his black shorts today.

You reminded yourself you were mainly here to focus on you. To get yourself into your head space and earn the snacks waiting for you at home, and zeroed in on the goal of reaching 10,000 stairs by the end of the week.

You were deep into your workout and in your own world when Cassian approached, admiring each jiggle not so secretly, “So y/n.”

“MOTHER F-” you cover your mouth, slapping the emergency stop button and feeling his hand instantly stabilizing you by touching your back. “You scared me!”

“I can tell,” he chuckled back. “I was just wondering if you wanted to try free weights with me today? I spot you? Teach you some stuff?”

I blinked at him, “Really?” He nodded almost boyishly, a playful grin on his face. “I can't spot you, though.”

He motioned over her shoulder to your boss and Azriel, “They exist still. Unfortunately.”

You bit your lip, knowing you'd look so out of place beside the 3 of them. “Cassian, I don't really work out to be-”

“You work out to take care of stress and eat whatever snacks you want. I know. Rhys told me. You'll get tired of cardio soon, so learning another area wouldn't hurt.”

You glared towards Rhys, “Traitor.”

“Is that a yes?”

You sighed and nodded, wiping down the handles of the machine you were on before letting him pull you over to Rhys and Azriel.

One workout became two. Two became twice a week. Twice a week became him coming over and enjoying snacks and a movie. Snacks and movie became dinner with Cassian at an expensive restaurant with Rhys, his wife, Feyre, Azriel, and his possibly girlfriend, Nesta. 

The table was silent as Cassian ordered a fairly unhealthy pasta, ate bread with you, and then shared dessert. It had been so long since they watched him genuinely enjoy food. “Cheat day,” he said casually as Azriel raised a brow at him. “I'm trying to mix y/n's work out to eat what she wants into my lifestyle once a week.” 

“He seems to like our snack and movie nights,” you glanced up at him, to you just admiring the way he smiled. But to the rest of the table, it was clear the gym crush you two shared was becoming much much more. Azriel slipped Rhys money under the table, conceding that he had won the bet. 

“Y/n told me a lot of research shows a cheat day is actually better for you than 7 hard days,” Cassian took another bite of the melted chocolate fudge brownie. “So we have a cheat day now on Sunday. We call it Sinday.”

“We still do a light walk,” you offered as Rhys looked confused. “But more of a “find some wilderness and explore walk than follow this beaten path one.” That dinner turned into many more. It turned into meeting each other's families. To merging friend groups. 

No activity you two tried topped the gym together. Especially after Cassian built and began running his own. His gym was built to cater to those who'd never felt welcomed. One way windows so the people inside could look out, but no one would see in. A mirror room dedicated to progress selfies to stop people from capturing a stranger in their pictures, a strict no bullying policy. He had made a safe haven for those who were serious about their workouts, and those who were just starting, and you could not have been more proud, especially now that you were teaching yoga and hot yoga classes there.

You two posed in the mirror, sweat dripping down him as he flexed and you kissed his cheek with your leg popped up, waiting for the camera to click breaking the no selfies on the main workout floor rule.

“Gross,” Azriel yelled. “Focus on training you two!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Cassian shot back. “I'm coming. Enjoy yoga, baby.”

“I will. Snacks tonight?”

“Absolutely,” he answered. “Those little no bake cookie balls would be so good."

"Oh, yeah. We'll pick those up!"

General Taglist:

@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanagers @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho @mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @loneliestluvr @eternallyelvish @azrielsmate3 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @meritxellao @aria-chikage @hungryforbatboys @lilah-asteria @fandomrejects @sleepybesson @tayswhp @itsswritten @milswrites @littlest-w01f

[herejusttosufferalong]

I think L gave us a lot of hints/messages about what might be going on post-premiere in that Jimmy F appearance. Let’s note that this was after Papgate, after his and N’s social media posts in the fallout period, and after Milan if I am remember correctly? The more I think about it the more I think his team crafted the content we saw to reset his public image, explain some things, and encourage the audience to give him some grace. It was damage control/positive PR/but also some explanations for what we are seeing.

First off, he came off relaxed and confident, a big contrast from how stressed he looked when he had been papped. I think they were also trying to portray him as a friendly and relatable regular guy who had suddenly been thrust into fame as a heartthrob and romantic lead.

Him running from the carriage scene music/talking about how he is not used to the level of fame and exposure and recognition that has come with the success of the show (barber story, needing security in Brazil).

The reference to JB passing down the guide that was called “How to fall in love in front of 82 million people” - more messaging that it is difficult to have that level of scrutiny and specifically when playing a romantic lead when you have insane chemistry with your costar.

The romantic lines, read B-ton style (these are so L/N coded and reference things L or N have brought up in interviews, with the exception of “East Peasy Lemon Squeezy.) We’ve got:

Espresso lyrics - song with significance to the ship, also what L was listening to getting ready for the London premiere, Honeybee, come get that pollen lyrics

“Penelope, we were on a break!” -this is the biggest hint right here of why L was papped/appears in a relationship with another woman after we have seen his and N’s chemistry jump off the screen for 6 months and also in the show itself. THEY (N/L) WERE ON A BREAK. I don’t think he wanted to be on a break, but they were, and I think they’re now on another one while he tries to get his affairs in order. And note that he says “Penelope,” not Rachel, which would be the accurate pop culture quote. Which doesn’t really make sense because he and P are never on a break during the show unless you count the time she stops writing to him and he goes off the rails. Penelope is code for N. Also he is referencing the R/R relationship/timing issues again.

Then the Barbie quote. I think this somewhat addresses him being attached to a strong beautiful powerful woman (LWD or N, take your pick) and that dynamic of potentially being overshadowed and having to find your own self worth in order to handle it . I don’t think that last part about being her Ken was scripted (JF even gives him a wtf look and then it gets cut when it airs), but he made it clear he is happy being her Ken. He basically claims his ass as hers on National TV without meaning to.

I think the interview didn’t have purposeful mention of N for a reason, he was trying to emphasize his role as a B-bro and an actor and romantic lead in his own right, and connect him to the other male leads, and the clip they chose showed that.

He then follows up with a social media post confirming a late night/non-work/non PR beach walk with N and said security guards. I mean… that was a date, and for him to post that in the face of everyone saying he had hard-launched A and he and N were “all PR” is crazy. They also have to be aware of all of the Brazil reports and speculation.

I think the messaging was: This is level of fame and exposure is new, he’s figuring it out, give him a break. Also, everything is okay between N&L so don’t worry, there may be reasons for why what we are seeing doesn’t make sense but they are figuring it out between them.

Would the general audience pick up on all of that? No, but the hardcore fans would so they layered it all in there. Maybe his PR team isn’t that dumb afterall?

I know there’s speculation N was there- I don’t know if she was but her immediate like definitely showed support and that they are still a team. Wouldn’t surprise me if she had a hand in some of that strategy.

I think this is the first in depth analysis I have ever seen on the JF appearance that I mostly agree with.

Thanks for sharing 💜🥃

[miks-delusional-blog]

A Night To Remember- Mizu x Fem! Reader

Tags: Fluff to angst sorry not sorry.

Notes: A/Ns at the end, based on a suggestion and the Beabadoobee X Laufey song, Mizu x Fem!reader, 1239 words

For Context: Mizu has travelled to London and is attending a ball hosted by Abijah Fowler. She hates it there, until she meets you.

When Mizu vowed her revenge, she told herself she’d do anything.

Kill anyone.

But being in these tight and scratchy foreign clothes, surrounded by these ogling British aristocrats…maybe revenge wasn’t worth it. She’d gone from being stared at like she was a demon to being stared at like she was some exotic animal on a world tour. Mizu didn’t know which she preferred.

She should’ve just killed Fowler in Japan. That smug pig. Going around the party as if Mizu wasn’t going to kill him after she was finished with him.

Mizu stood at the edge of the room. She tried leaning against the wall but the tight clothes didn’t let her. So she stood close to the wall.

Occasionally, Fowler would talk to a party patron and gesture towards her, and they’d laugh or raise a brow. She didn’t know what he was saying, but she didn’t need to.

She just needed to get through the ball without beheading him. 

Mizu hears a woman’s voice next to her, jumping her a little. She turns her head, her eyes meeting yours. 

You speak again in foreign tongues. Mizu tries to form some words in English. She hasn’t picked up as much as she’d like.

You smile softly, saying words she can’t understand until…

“...how about Japanese? Can you understand me now?” 

Mizu’s eyes widened in recognition, “Yes- I can.”

You smile a little wider, the corners of your eyes crinkling slightly, “finally. I was running out of languages.” 

“You speak Japanese?” 

“Yes… but not as well as I might like.”

“Well enough. Not many foreigners speak Japanese.”

“Not many Japanese adventures outside of Japan… And technically you are the foreigner.” You say with a small chuckle.

“I’m always a foreigner.”

Your brow rises slightly, “do you travel a lot?”

“Recently, yes.”

“Why is that?”

“I’m… here on business.”

“Business huh?.. Vague. Though, that suits the mysterious persona you’ve put on for the party guests.”

Mizu’s lips twitch down, an eyebrow raises. “Mysterious persona?” 

“Yes. You naturally stick out. And no one at this party can talk to you. Except for Mr Fowler, and well… me now.” You look out at the party guests, Mizu’s eyes follow. 

Her natural glare catches the eyes of some of the guests, who quickly avert their gazes. 

“Is that why you came to talk to me?” her hardened gaze falls back onto you.

“I was curious about you... And wanted some conversational practice.” You lower your gaze to your skirt as her tone becomes colder. “And I suppose I wondered if you wanted some company… It must be strange experiencing a foreign land.”

Mizu pauses for a moment, observing you. “...It’s definitely different to what I am used to.”

Across the ballroom, the band picks up their instruments, and the party guests pair up, gathering in the centre. 

“How about some cultural enrichment?” You take Mizu’s arm before she can protest, pulling her to the dance floor. “Like this.” You place one of her hands on your waist, above your hip, and hold her other hand about your shoulder height.

Mizu’s hand on your waist loosens a little, “What are we-” the music begins.

“Just trust me, stranger. Follow my lead.” You smile as you press her hand against your waist, stepping to the music. 

Mizu looks around at the other party guests as she tries to step with you, her feet accidentally knocking into yours. You let out a wince, her gaze snapping back to yours. “Sorry-” She steps back.

“Relax, I’m fine…Just, keep your eyes on me. Follow my lead…” You pull her back to a standstill before the both of you step to the music. The two of you find a rhythm. Her shoulders began to relax, not realising how tense they had become.

“Not a dancer?” you ask.

“...This is not my kind of dance.” Mizu gazes down at her feet, trying her best to keep up.

“You’re a quick learner.” 

She glances up at you. “I try to adapt to my environment.” 

“And how’s that going?” You smirk a little.

Mizu looks back down at her feet, slightly embarrassed.

Your gaze softens a little. “Maybe… I can help you adapt. Give you an English lesson or two…” 

“I… don’t plan to stay long.”

“How long?”

“I will leave as soon as I finish my business here.”

“Well… I’ll still be in London, however long your business takes.” 

There’s a moment of just movement. Just the two of you stepping to the music. 

You chuckle. Mizu’s gaze flickers up to you as you do, and her eyebrow raises slightly. 

“Sorry..” you begin, “I realised that… I haven’t even asked your name… or told you mine…yet you’ve allowed me to drag you to the dance floor. I’m so sorry.” Your apology is laced with laughter.

The corners of Mizu’s lips quirk up at the ridiculousness. “I suppose I should have introduced myself… I just got… excited about finding someone who can understand me.”

“I excite you?” 

Mizu lets out a soft scoff. 

“I’ve been told I excite a lot of men.” You smirk.

“I’m sure you do.”

“So, what is your name stranger?” You ask as you adjust your hand to rest on Mizu’s shoulder, her hand gripping your waist tighter without your aid. 

“My name is Mizu.”

“Mizu? Like water… the stuff you drink…or bathe in?” Your head tilts a little.

“Yes.” Her eyebrows furrow a little.

“Hm…Just Mizu?”

“Just Mizu.” 

“Hm…” I think about pestering more.

“What’s your name then?” She says before you can act on your thoughts.

You tell her your name, which she tries to say back at you. You say your name again, and again a little slower. Mizu tries a little harder to say it.

You smile, “you are a fast learner.”

“You’re a good teacher…” She smiles as she repeats your name.

“Well, Mizu, I’m lucky to have a quick student.” 

The rhythmic dance slows to an end as the song ends. You separate from her and bow, which she copies awkwardly. As your gazes meet you giggle, which she in turn smiles. 

The two of you walk off the dance floor, retreating to the edge of the ballroom to a large window. 

“The moon is pretty tonight,” you remark.

“It is.” She replies as she glances at you.

“So…Mizu… How did you find Western dancing? Feel culturally enriched?” 

“It was… Different… Culturally enriching.” She smiles. 

You smile in return. “We could… try more culturally enriching activities whilst you’re in London. If you’d like.”

“I…” as she’s about to speak her eyes catch with Fowler’s, and a fiery pit flickers in her stomach, her smile fading to something cold. “I…intend to do my business… efficiently.”

“Oh…I see.” Your smile falters. “Well…I hope this night of distraction doesn’t hold you back on your endeavours…That…you gained something of value out of…our time.”

Mizu’s gaze falls back to you, but your eyes don’t meet this time. “...I did.”

You smile softly, but it’s not like it was before.”Well…I’m glad.” A voice calls you over, to which you turn your head. You glance back at Mizu. “I suppose I must go…It was nice meeting you Mizu. Good luck with your business. I hope you resolve it efficiently.”

Mizu bows her head at you, replying with a quiet and polite,  “Thank you…”

You return the gesture before walking away, leaving Mizu back on her path of revenge.

Ending notes: and like the phoenix I rise from the dead. I'm so sorry to @nanafan707 I promised this many a month ago. It's been so long I think their account is inactive lmao. Anyways, I wanted to post this, I've thought about this idea a lot over the summer, and now I have produced. I hope you guys enjoyed this.

[chokisnumber1fan]

kriti; an ode to devotion

dr. ratio x fem!reader, in which ratio finds himself absolutely smitten for a musician from earth.

content/warnings: 1.4k words, reader is very very feminine, referred to with she/her, reader is also indian and a maestro at indian classical music, i made this purely as a self-indulgent self-insert piece, religious imagery/writing, good ol’ potential ooc dr. ratio warning, he does not know ANYTHING about indian classical music or hindu culture, a few sanskrit terms used

author’s note: aaaah i can’t stop thinking about how dr. ratio would absolutely just fall in love with people passionate for their lines of work. i know this is pretty much just a self insert of my own but the thought of ratio with an s/o devoted to music or dance is so... <3

ratio feels like he’s sighed for the millionth time today. “didn’t you find someone else to do your bidding, gambler?” his question is met with a resounding and joyful nope! from aventurine, who drags him into the crowded theatre. “i had two tickets for this show because my friend was very kind. but no one else could make it on such short notice,” the blonde says, the smile never leaving his face. “so, i’m glad you came with me, doctor. ah! two empty seats! lucky us, eh?”

“whatever.”

ratio can’t say he’s the biggest fan of music— he dabbles in it from time to time, but nothing too much. it it weren’t for the gambler’s insistence, he would currently have been home and indulging in a relaxing bath; but alas, aventurine always gets what he wants. “i’m surprised you even have friends with a personality as repulsive as yours.”

“that hurt, you know,” aventurine says, clutching at his chest and forcing a pained expression onto his face. “do you really think i’m that bad?”

“no, i just think you are an idiot. or that the friends you have are equally as repulsive as you.”

the chatter around him turns into static white noise and he stares emptily at the blank stage, numbers and letters going left and right and center in his brain. the frustrating proof that the doctor had been trying to work on for weeks now is making a resurgence in his head. well, on second thought, maybe it’s not so bad that he got dragged out… perhaps, the doctor could make use of this opportunity to unplug and relax a bit. maybe the gambler isn’t so much of an idiot after all (aventurine knows, but he won’t let up).

ratio is snapped out of his daze as the curtains draw to a close, the stage now hidden behind them. a good portion of the crowd silences, in anticipation of the performance that was about to begin any second now. he heaves a sigh when the curtains reopen, a subconsciously bated breath being released.

in the middle of the stage sits a woman wearing a rich blue… robe? stole? no, it’s probably a saree, he surmises. “that’s her!” aventurine says excitedly with a gasp. “do you see her, doctor?” the soft light falling on the woman seems to reflect off of her in a subtle shine. almost like an ethereal goddess... “yes, i do, aventurine, i am not blind. i’m actually surprised you have friends from earth, of all planets.”

and ratio truly was genuinely surprised— not because he truly believed that aventurine’s personality would be an obstacle between him and his friendships, but because as far as he knew, earth was one of those tiny planets in a remote arm of the milky way galaxy. the people of earth tended to have their own cultures and gods that they worshipped instead of the aeons, and all of this differed widely between major regions on the planet. the… earthlings? well, in any case, they rarely ever travelled outside of their home planet— the maximum they usually ever went was within their planetary system. maybe they’re finally beginning to get out of their comfort zone? no one knows for sure.

the chatter of the crowd gradually dies down as three others assemble next to the woman with their instruments. she takes a sip from the bottle that lay next to her, and ratio notices the slight motion she makes with her hand. he assumes this was to get the show going, because the instrumentalists began playing their parts. they start with a monotonous and constant drone, after which the other stringed instrumentalist joins along with the harmonium player— and finally, you. ratio finds his interest piqued— he does not know much about earth and its customs and cultures.

you take a breath and you start singing. you start off slow and mellow, but ratio can feel the intensity and tempo of the performance gradually increasing— and with it, the intricacies of phrases that you’re singing. he finds it infuriatingly captivating, the way you jump through the chromatic scale with ease, like a deer prancing about in the forest. he wonders if you speak in melody.

ratio swears it’s the most masterful thing he’s ever listened to. he’s never listened to this kind of music ever in his life before, he knows nothing. it’s not as big as a choir or orchestra— and yet, he finds it amazing, the ease with which you conduct everyone with a flick of your hand. no… it’s not conducting. it seemed too unauthoritative to be. honestly, he has a lot of questions but for now he lets himself think of it simply for what it probably was— a well coordinated performance (and he would not be wrong to think of it that way either).

the skillful gliding of your voice has ratio enamoured. he finds it impressive, how easily you seem to be gliding over three octaves of notes without breaking out into as much as a sweat. he can only imagine the years and years of practice that must have gone into gaining such mastery— you make it look as easy as breathing. he would be lying if he said he didn’t find it attractive to some degree at the very least.

it takes him completely by surprise when you look in his direction and shoot your biggest most saccharine smile ever. and then he remembers about your supposed friendship with the man next to him and realises that it wasn’t for him. the gambler wasn’t lying, eh? who was ratio kidding, you didn’t even know him.

but he’s starting to become far gone. ratio isn’t a sapiosexual or whatever, by any means, even if he comes off as such. he knows that people think he would only be willing to date someone who has more phds than he does, but that’s not true at all. ratio believes that one must be passionate about anything that they choose to do. ultimately, that’s really what gets him hooked. he’s absolutely taking delight in looking at the fruits of your years of devotion to your art. and you, your performance is so enchanting it almost hurts. he feels like a dazed sailor drawn to a siren.

heh, it wouldn’t be so bad if the siren was you, he thinks, but immediately cringes at the thought afterward, discarding it into some corner of his brain he hopes to never see again.

oh, aventurine isn’t blind to any of this. he looks at the doctor’s eyes glued onto the stage with hyperfocus, and laughs. he doesn’t miss the way his grip on the armrests grow tighter and tighter, the flexing and tensing of his muscles obvious. who would’ve thought that his musician friend from earth of all people would’ve had the doctor whipped? he supposes it wasn’t a bad decision to bring ratio along, after all.

the audience bursts into thunderous clapping once you hit the end of your performance. ratio almost thought there was going to be no end to it— not that he’d complain though, it would’ve given him more time to study your performance, your art, more time to study you. “that was… that was a splendid performance. i wasn’t expecting to find myself hooked onto a musical of all things, seems like you aren’t completely bad, gambler.” ratio is completely candid with his compliment.

“oh, i know how much you enjoyed this,” aventurine says rather suggestively, catching the doctor off-guard. “hey, i’m going into the backstage to meet her— would you like to tag along?”

ratio is elated at the offer. of course he’d want to meet you, he’s got so many questions and— “sure…” his expression remains as stoic as ever. he’s always been able to count on himself but now? he hopes his deadpan image isn’t betrayed by his feelings, and he finds it so impossibly difficult to fight back the smile that’s slowly creeping onto his features as he watches you and aventurine converse like you were best friends reunited.

“this is my friend, doctor ratio!”

“oh, so you’re the doctor that everyone talks about! nice to meet you, i’m _____.”

you knew him already? well, it’s no big deal, you must have heard about him from aventurine. fuck, you look so much more heavenly up close. you’re like the manifestation of a goddess, with the way you seem to literally radiate a glow and everything. shit, if he didn’t know any better, he’d think you were an emanator of beauty, or an incarnation of devi saraswati (he hopes he isn’t thinking of the wrong goddess with his limited knowledge of hindu culture).

“likewise. just veritas is fine, too. that was an absolutely phenomenal performance, back then.”

veritas doesn’t know the first thing about the gods you sung the praises of during your performance, but he does think that your devotion to the art must be unmatched. he feels like you are a personification of the heavens, and he’s blind to everything that isn’t your divine beauty. there’s something so ancient about your art, and you’re almost like an envoy of the gods— aeons, you’re slowly getting him wrapped around your damn finger, and he doesn’t think he’s going to do anything to stop it.

“thank you, veritas,” you smile at him, and he feels a slight warmth. “i’ll be performing again at the grand theatre soon. you’ll be there, right?”

[marengogo]

Rambling in INFJese - Part 10: Queerful In South Korea

SGMB and RPWP focused playlist

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

Gurls, Bois and Enbies … Hellooooooooooo 📢 Yes, I’m finally, officially, back from my travels.

Am I feeling relaxed and refreshed?

NO.

In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m more tired than when I left 😬. You see, there was more excitement than I thought, or even budgeted for, but, lowkey highkey I knew it was going to turn out like that, so, it was what it was and it was unforgettable 😊💜. 

Now, on to the topic of today!

As the title kinda spoils, I would like to bring forth the topic of queerness in present day Korea, touching upon specific sub-subjects within this main-theme, which you will discover as you keep reading.

In order to provide more context and understanding, I’ll have to bring up a bit of Geography, a tad of Politics and a lot of History, and let me make this clear, even though I have been out of politics for quite some time I used to be very invested in world politics … I am presently indeed somewhat annoyed, because there seems to be a lot of misinformation that has been going around with regards to what it might mean to be gay/queer person in South Korea, in the big year of 2024, which is why I’d also like to encourage us to be proactive and do some research, on our own, with the available resources that are out there. I know it sounds heavy, but I promise I’ll try and make it as least cumbersome, and as much relatable to what might concern all Queer people, and JK and JM of course, as possible ✌🏾.

Let’s start with some Geography.

Asia … is a big ass continent. Because it is so big, amongst the people who make these kind of decisions, it was decided that this continent would have to be divided into 5 regions: Central, East, South, Southeast and West. The regions we are going to be concerned with are East and Southeast also known as ASEAN. The East has a total of 8 countries, out of which we are going to focus on 4 being; China, Japan, South Korea and Taiwan, while the Southeast has a total of 11, out of which we are only going to concentrate on 1, being Thailand … aaand that was all for Geography; painless right?

Great. So now it is time for some of History. We are now going to be talking about the history of the BL genre and the Queer art genre within two particular cultures; Eastern and Western.

BL, otherwise known as Boy’s Love, is a genre that was born in Japan in the 1970s. To properly discuss the world of BL it would take way too many blogs, so I’m afraid I won’t delve too deep into it, but in order to proceed with our discourse I need for everyone to at least understand the substantial difference between, for example, a series like The Eight Sense and Heartstopper. The first is a BL and the other is a Queer Coming-of-Age Drama. These two series are the I most point out very positive outcome of a lot of struggle and progress within both the BL and Queer art genre through the years.

The East and BLs - BL was created by women to be consumed by other women in Japan. It had nothing to do with creating content for gay/queer people, and this is very fundamental for everyone to understand. The thing is that it doesn’t matter where in the world you are, if you are or were a girl/woman you know the struggles are real. Different parts of the world deal with this frustration in different ways, and Japan and eventually the other 4 Asian countries I listed above found this to be one of them. The BL genre is basically having two men in a forbidden relationship, driven by mad passion, and who would always choose each other over the rest of the world. Star crossed-lovers where one of them would always be the Seme/Top or male-male and the other the Uke/Bottom or female-male. At the core of it all, BL was intended to be escapism, which eventually turned into fetishism and now can be all the above and something else entirely; evolution aye?

Mainly Asian women perhaps used BL to feel like their opinions and emotions could matter, in an environment where like also many other countries in Africa men are the ones that have the last say, or just any say at all. So they fulfilled their fantasy of being heard, and having power, while at the same time having the “strongest/most ideal” of men fall desperately in love with this male version of themselves. It is obviously much more complex than my two line sentence explanation, but for now, kindly keep this image in your mind.

Moving on!

The West and Queer Art - The queer genre in the West for the longest time was almost always a guaranteed tragedy. Interestingly enough, even though the first movie that mentioned homosexuality was in the 1960, the beginning of Queer culture in movies was, also for the West, in the 1970s. I can’t tell you the amount of books and films I have read and seen in my day says the woman in her thirties LOL and, despite the heart-wrenching looming tragedy, I would still enjoy finding comfort during those few chapters/scenes when the couple/pairing was happy, even though I knew for a fact that either one of them or both would die, or be eternally separated, or some other kind of tragedy.

The funny thing is that I would just accept it, because why not? Is not like my reality showed any different. It wasn’t like I was aware of happy and successful queer people around me, so why would I expect to read or watch anything else? Also I am a nasty ass angsty person so really I have no excuse. 

… are y’all following me thus far?

Now, let’s take a bit of a leap into the 2000s where money-makers finally clocked in on the fact that there is mad-money that can be made with BL in the East and Queerness in the West. In the East we start adopting fanservice within boybands and Asian-Dramas, we start printing thousands of BL mangas, and producing as many animes to match. In the West we keep having the token queer comedian appear on every show as well as making movies of historic queer figures who have impacted the world somehow, so that the queers can feel represented, even though all the actors are for the most part straight, because at this point in time, even though we acknowledge that Queer people exist, coming out is still very meh.

As the 2000s progress and we enter the 2010s thanks to actual progress within some western countries, the interweb and social media it becomes increasingly easier for an Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin (Bl lover girl/boy/enby) to find themselves in say the UK, which has areas that breathe queerness and queer history and for a Western Queer to find themselves in say Japan where they can easily buy a manga about “queers” in happy relationship or, somewhere in South Korea, can easily see two very attractive boys/girls from a random kpop band openly kiss.

And then, in the midst of this “cultural” exchange, and awakening, something happens.

The Eastern Fujoshi/Fudanshi/Fujin realise that there are actual real queer people in the world sounds stupid, but believe me, it is not. That queer people are not just characters in a book, or anime, and that in fact there really are people in the world who are for example of the same sex and truly wanna be together and, if gay, for example, can also be both very masculine and still want to be together. At the same time the Western Queer realise that they actually can be happy, and that they deserves a happy ending, because some of this BLs aren’t half as bad and they sometimes make valid points and then you find out that actual queer people are now also writing BLs so things start to make some sense. 

As I mentioned, society was also changing, Queer people in the West started gaining a few rights, such as being able to get married in America and some European countries, and as a consequence, in the following decade, we now have series and movies that have Queer protagonist, with happy endings to boot! In the East, things are either not moving at all or moving a bit differently, or kinda slowly, but still it is movement. Within the countries that are moving differently, talking about Queerness is still heavy but has finally become something that they “don’t mind” just talking about and the gay neighbour is actually seen as the gay neighbour, whether they will talk to them is debatable, but at least they are recognised as such and not absurdly explained away or their existence ignored.

Now back to geography. The reason why I mentioned those 5 countries (China, Japan, South Korea, Taiwan and Thailand) is because at some point in the 2010s they were the main producers, and consumers, of BL within the Asian continent, and yes, while still being hella homophobic and, but let’s be real for a second, queer people have been around since the beginning of time, so even though BL was made and intended for women, our Queer Eastern Siblings would find a way to secretly also consume BL, being the closest thing to reading about a queer relationship, so added to the westerner consumption as well, it is no surprise that these 5 countries suddenly had a boom, despite having been being homophobic. 

Hence, it can be said that these 5 countries were on the same wavelength in the early 2010s, but what about now? With the considerable change in behaviour and thought with regards to Queer people in these countries in the early 2020s where do these 5 countries stand with regards to their Queer people and politics? Well, China has now banned BLs entirely, and I will not delve into their further lack of queer rights. Taiwan and Thailand have legalised Queer marriage. Then there is Japan which is making progress towards trying to legalise Queer marriage with to my greatest joy a successful ruling that happened this year in March related to same-sex unions … so, what about South Korea?

Well … SK is so close 🥹 … Yet so far 😫

It’s like they are taking 4 steps forward and 3 steps backwards, constantly. They are well far from China-levels which is a fucking relief I tell you! but they are dragging their feet to be at Japan-levels (and Japan is very close to Thailand and Taiwan Queer status currently). Yet, it is not as negative as it seems, or as some people try to portray it. You look around social media and they depict SK as if it were China. SK is currently facing a situation where it notices that things are changing and change is scary y’all. Resistance is the usual reaction to change, and the older generations, mainly those led by the Christian groups are not really where is at. SK’s youth and older liberal generations hold the answer to the Queer Korea questions.

So what exactly makes SK look hopeful? Well, time to get back to some History again 😘

The first Queer organisation in SK was formed in 1993 by 3 gay men and 3 lesbian women. The following year the 6 separated into 2 groups and formed the first gay organisation and the first lesbian one respectively. In 1997 we have the first demonstration for gay and lesbian rights, which then lead into 2000, the year of the first Pride Parade, which is one of the events of the very first Seol Queer Culture Festival Daegu Queer Culture Festival will be created in 2009, do keep this in mind … but another major event happened in the year 2000.

Y’all know that saying X walked so that Y could run? Well Hong Seok Cheon was basically forced to walk so that Queer Korean could learn how to properly train to run.

Though Seok-cheon is presently back to being somewhat popular again, his coming out was pretty traumatic. His career as comedian/actor started in 1994 and he was quite popular which landed him a good number of acting roles, and a lot of placements in comedy shows, as well as a kids show. In 2000 he was asked about his sexuality and he had no qualms in replying that he was gay. The show editors decided to cut out that part but a journalist gotta love them 🙃 got a hold of the footage and forced him to “elaborate”. Upon confirming, Seok-cheon lost all his jobs and was shunned verbally abused, discrimination and the lot, oh yes … by his own country. 

Not surprisingly, given that nobody in his own country wanted to interact with him, he at first thought of moving to the US to start afresh, but then decided against it. Seok-cheon decided to stay and prove to everyone in his country that he could make it and be successful again. And that he did. In 2002 he opened the first of what now is a high end chain of 9 restaurants in Itaewon. 2004 he joined the Democratic Labor Party and was selected by Time magazine as the Asian Hero of that year and in the following years Seok-cheon will keep racking up achievements  🎶🎵Did you see my bag? Did you see my bag? 🎶🎵 Namean?! (I’m not gonna list them all but you should definitely look him up and learn a bit about him, if you are interested).

But how does that connect to today? In 2008 he started his own talk show Coming Out and though there was a bit of resistance at the beginning as expected, the youth came in force and he started gaining audiences and boom! He was back on TV and slowly he’d get also a few cameos on prominent media, such as the Netflix drama Itaewon Class. Now let’s leave the lime-light for a second and let's look at the military 😬. It is vitally important that people understand that being gay is not illegal in any of the 5 countries we’ve been talking about yes, even China, but the public opinion and beliefs of each country greatly influence how their queer communities are thought of and treated.

Now, SK Military has become pretty infamous within the queer community for conducting witch-hunts in order to find out and humiliate gay soldiers, so much so that organisations such as Amnesty eventually had to step in. That being said, let's be real real real for a second. Though it is appalling what they have done to the queer soldiers, the SK military was also very famous for hazing, assaulting, causing cadets regardless of sexuality to want to unalive themselves and what more. All of the aforementioned, which put SK’s military on the map in a not so positive light globally, added to the increase in suicides, made the government address the situation, and they eventually came up with solutions such as the buddy system, which was first implemented in 2003. But, back to the gays. The most popular witch-hunt happened in 2017 where two soldiers amongst others were outed, but these particular two were found guilty of having sex off-base, during off hours.

In 2022 this conviction was overturned, the soldiers were no longer guilty and it is now no longer illegal, for queer soldiers, to have sex off-base during off-hours. You know what else happened in 2022? SK aired their first Queer reality shows, one being To Me(a)rry Queer and and the other being His Man. In 2023, His Man 2 will give us our first successful real-life queer couple, who are our beloved couple Junseong and Seongho (together known as Junseongho). They are the first queer couple to ever appear on Dazed magazine and we are all familiar with Dazed, it is not the front page like our boys get, but we all know how big of a deal this is, right?

You know what else happened in 2023? Remember that Daegu Queer Culture Festival I was talking about? The Mayor of Daegu (big Christian sympathiser) tried to stop this festival which includes the Parade and many other events, even though the Court ruled it was okay for the Festival to be carried out. The Mayor gathered other supporters and pulled up to the group, but the Daegu Police protected the Festival and removed the mayor and his “friends” from the premises. This was big and made news worldwide. 

In fact, Daegu’s Queer Culture Festival is the second largest one in the country, after Seoul’s. This is mainly possible because the Local Authorities (such as the police) are quite independent in belief from their present Mayor and the Christian factions. In contrast, for example, Busan’s Queer Culture Festival had a two year run but was then cancelled in 2019. Unfortunately, in Busan, The Mayor, the Local Authorities and the Christian factions are buddy-buddies making it much harder to get protection and permissions, aaaaaand things like that, kids, is why it is super important to vote for your local administration as well.

Even though these are all very important stepping stones, SK is nowhere close to being the UK, obviously. The LGBTQ community still has to get all their core rights being legalised, and queer people can still be subject to random ass attacks, such as the singer Holland had in 2022, which, by the way, also still occasionally does happen in the UK and everywhere else in the Queer World. Which is a general minority reality I’m afraid.

Furthermore, it is still illegal to have sex on base, which the country maintains that they are upholding because they are trying to prevent possible sexual assaults not too mad about this tbh, which is a valid concern, but most importantly they now know that the world is watching and why is that important? Because, for example, even though they are now separated, one of the boys from the Me(a)rry Queer couples enlisted around the same time with JK & JM and from his posts and photo-booth pictures that other soldiers posted of him, he seems to be making friends and to be comfy as comfy as you can get while serving, kinda like Joonie and most likely JM & JK

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by 박보성 (@park_bosung)

Not quite the attitude of someone fearing a witch-hunt, right? But then again, there isn’t much to hunt when you are already out, it is afterall illegal to hunt people and the world is now aware; is there? …

Now back to the general people of SK. According to a survey conducted in 2023 last year, 56% of South Koreans still oppose same-sex marriage (in comparison with only 26% of Japanese). 56% is not bad but then 72% don’t want queer people in their neighbourhoods and  workplace, though 81% think that it is not right to terminate people because of their sexual orientation 4 steps ➡️3 steps ⬅️… … … Basically it’s okay to be queer here as in SK, but not here-here, perhaps over there like a queer only neighbourhood or something which at the moment is the Itaewon district. 

So yes, 2024 Queer SK is still struggling though they are not going to be overtly nasty about it, because the world is watching. I mean, don’t get me wrong, progress is progress and we love to see that, it is actually amazing, but there still needs to be a general environment where LGBTQ rights in SK need to be recognised and for queer Koreans to not be discriminated against in their social/work/family life. It is also great that Queer media is trying to transition more and more from only BL to actual Queer Drama, for example I am really looking forward to watching Love In The Big City which btw also stars Kim Go Eun.

There is still work to be done, but I think Jung Cueri, a lesbian woman who helps with the Seoul Queer Culture Festival, says it best (here is the full article https://www.dw.com/en/why-are-south-koreans-less-welcoming-of-lgbtq-neighbors/a-68698268 ):

“I think the attitudes of younger generations of Koreans are getting better," she said, pointing out that young LGBTQ+ individuals "tend to come out sooner to their families, in their workplaces and schools than my generation because they are more aware of their sexuality through social media and exposure to various discussions that are more tolerant of LGBTQ+ people." And the cultural festival can help to be a catalyst to change further, she believes. "It will get better," she said. "And that is why the organizers and everyone else involved in the festival are working so hard; they know that Korean society will get better, and they want to contribute to that.

From where I stand it seems Hopeful, Queerful, if you may.

So, Fighting!, Queer South Korea!

Always respectfully yours,

Marengo. 

[sl-newsie]

American Woman (Thomas Shelby x American OC) Ch. 29: I Hope You're Happy

Masterlist: https://www.tumblr.com/sl-newsie/739551758747090944/american-woman-thomas-shelby-x-american-oc?source=share

Beep! Beep!

“Get a move on!”

“Watch it, toots!”

The streets of Brooklyn are one of the aspects of home that aren’t the best. But in a strange way the shouting brings a form of comfort to me. All these people, all different backgrounds, scrambling around to make a living. Bunches of people crammed into a giant city.

And the boat docks bring in even more people.

“Grace! Thomas! Hello!” I shout over the noise and wave them over away from the crowd. “Welcome to Brooklyn, where everyone sounds angry but they’re actually not… Most of the time.”

The sight of their joined hands makes my smile falter by a hair. Lovely engagement ring. Relax, Steenstra. You should be honored they chose your country for a holiday. 

“Hello, Verena.” Thomas smiles politely, scanning the bustling streets. “We’ve got one week here. Since this is your turf, what should we know?”

I can handle playing tour guide. “First, you need to see Lady Liberty. Prospect Park is good too. Also be careful in ‘Hattan ‘cause there’s construction for the new Rockefeller Center.”

The whole time I’m speaking Grace looks at me with confusion. “Did you know we were coming?”

“I spoke of it in the letter I sent,” Thomas answers for me.

Grace, still looking at me, nods. “I see.”

Message received. This is my home but I’m not welcomed to visiting with them. 

“You need to have a drink in Irishtown. Find The Wicked Monk, the best Irish pub on the East Coast. And stop by our joint if you want! Father would be happy to meet you.”

Grace doesn’t like that one bit.

“I’ll leave you to see the sights. I’ve gotta get back home to the shop. Tot ziens! Was good seeing you!”

Back into the bustling noise. Good. It will drown out my anger… By seeing people shout who are much angrier than I am. Now my own home, my used-to-be haven, is now stained with jealousy because of their voyage.

Two years later.

Words. Words. Words. The only thing linking me to the Shelbys. After Thomas and Grace went back to Birmingham I waited to hear back from someone. Anyone. Anything saying when they want me back. Nothing was said. Only a few letters describing their new happy lives and how the company is growing. Everyone is happy…

“Verena! Over here!”

And today is another reminder of the happiness I’m leaving behind. The wedding I hoped for but will never have. 

“Thomas! It’s been too long!” I greet as I haul my trunk off the train. “Oh my, you haven’t changed a bit!”

Same clean-shaven handsome face, same sharp suit. 

“And you look stunning, as usual,” the gangster smiles. “Welcome back to Birmingham.”

We start walking off the platform, no doubt to a car he has waiting for us. It’s so good to see him it's all I can do not to hug him. To look at those eyes.

“I won’t be staying too long, I don’t want to impose-”

“Nonsense. There’s plenty of room,” Thomas replies with ease. In the corner of my eye I see him looking. “You’re wearing your hair in braids?”

I raise an eyebrow. “Is that a problem?”

“Guess not. ‘S just you’ve never done it before.”

“I do at home. Just thought I’d show some Dutch culture.”

Thomas chuckles. “You’re not going to start wearing clogs, are you?” 

I dramatically hold a hand up to stop him. “Heavens, no. That part of my heritage I can live without. But enough of me. How are you? This is a big day.”

A little enthusiasm doesn’t hurt. Despite my dislike for the given situation he still needs all the support he can get. I can tell his mind is in many places.

“‘M nervous,” Thomas says, anxiously rubbing his face. “But excited.”

“My brothers thought the exact same way on their wedding days.” With my free hand I give him a comforting pat on the back. “Don’t stress, it passes. Eoin nearly fainted on his wedding day.”

I was right. Today's car is a beautiful black Fiat 501. Thomas still spares no expense when it comes to his cars. He packs my luggage in the trunk and, like the gentleman he is, opens the door for me. A guts and glory gangster yet he still remembers how to treat a woman.

“Thanks for being here,” he says when we start driving. “Ada still doesn’t always see eye to eye with me and the boys just keep joking around.”

“Of course. Glad to be of service.” Time to throw on the American charm. “You’ve probably heard this multiple times but congratulations! These two years are up and now it’s time for you to tie the knot! It’s not every day one gets to witness an English wedding. Is it any different?”

The word ‘wedding’ throws Thomas’ smile off for a split second but the usual catch-up chatter resumes as we make our way out of town. We pass a sign that says Warwickshire. Apparently Thomas bought his own house and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t itching to see it. Maybe a quaint cottage with a nice horse barn-

Or a freaking mansion. That… That works too, I guess.

“Verena, welcome to Arrow House.”

‘House’ does little to describe it. This is an all-out mansion! Thomas’ castle. He drops me off to the front door and has a handyman drive the car away. I walk through the grand entrance and notice the gorgeous decorations for the special day.

A grand long table dressed in white, decorated with colorful flower centerpieces. They even brought out the best china. All around maids and waiters are scurrying to and fro, finishing the last-minute touches. Above the table is a giant portrait of Thomas holding the reins to one of his magnificent white horses.

“Like it? Got a good price for it.”

As much as I want to be glad for him I can’t help but think he’s using his wealth to compensate for happiness. I must be honest.

“This isn’t you, Thomas. All this money? Living like royalty?”

He walks us further into the house to the edge of a large staircase. “I’d say the family’s earned it.”

I shake my head with sympathy. “You can paint many pictures of yourself but you’re still Thomas Shelby. A simple life can be just as rewarding as an expensive one.”

But he’s amused by this. “Ah, Verena. Still philosophical as ever.”

There’s no use trying to change his mind. This is his world. He’s proud of it. We get to the top of the stairs and I see a familiar framed picture of Lady Liberty.

“I see you kept the picture from your trip.”

Thomas sees where I’m looking. “New York is a wild place. I don’t know how you grew up there.”

I quirk an eyebrow. “Birmingham is no tamer.”

Thomas smirks. “Touché. I did enjoy it, really. The Statue of Liberty was one of Grace’s favorites.”

“If you liked that then next time I’ll show you guys Niagara Falls. Gorgeous place.”

Thomas starts to reach for my hand. “Do you need help with your bags?”

I quickly pull away. “No no, it’s quite alright. This city girl can haul her own luggage.”

He shows me to a room at the end of the hall. A room so big it’s the size of our living room back home. Um, is this a good idea? Inviting another woman to stay in the house of a newly-married couple? I really should find somewhere else to stay. Grace will have my eyes if she sees me here.

“Is this alright?” Thomas asks.

“Thomas, this- The room is perfect. But I should really-”

“Great! I have to finish up some things downstairs. The wedding starts in one hour, I’ll arrange for someone to drive you.” He strides back down the hall.

“Wait!” I run to catch up and meet him at the top of the stairs. “I know my vote doesn’t count but I must say that I am very proud of what you’ve made of yourself. You’re not the same man I met all those years ago, Thomas. You’re a father. A husband. A legit businessman. May God smile upon your family today.”

This is probably the last time I can talk to him alone, and I really do want the Shelbys to be happy. Today is a day for good spirits.

“Verena, that… That means a lot,” Thomas says, looking up from a few stairs below. “Thank you. I-”

“Mr. Shelby!” A maid calls from the bottom.

“Be right there!” Thomas looks at me one last time before heading down. “I’ll see you later.”

Yes. Later. When he’s married.

“Wow. Royal in-laws? You’ve moved up in the world,” I comment as we drive by multiple uniformed men.

“It’s Grace’s relatives,” John says from up front. “Between us, I’m still not used to the uniforms. None of us are. They’re only here for her.”

“It’s good to have you here!” Finn says for the tenth time.

“It’s worth it to see you all. And Arthur, you look very handsome as the best man.”

The man driving us to the church smiles bashfully. “That’s nice of ya, Steenstra. I can’t wait for you to meet Linda. Will you be here for the toast?”

“No, no. I’ll be around for the reception.”

There’s already enough drama between the Shelbys and Grace’s family. I’ll only add to the mix. A quick congrats, a small drink, and I’ll pop out.

I’ll give it to the Brits, they sure know how to have a proper wedding. This church is marvelous! I take my seat next to Finn and see Polly waving from a few seats down. Such a welcoming reunion. If only it weren’t for this occasion. Thomas strides down the aisle, looking very handsome in his spiffy tux, and stands next to Arthur at the altar. The usual music begins and all eyes turn to the silhouette approaching from outside.

Oh my goodness… That dress! A gorgeous lavender if I ever did see one. And the veil… a cascade of purple lace. No wonder Thomas is so happy. Grace gets to the end of the aisle and Jeremiah approaches the couple.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we have gathered here today to join these two together in holy matrimony. Thomas Michael Shelby and Grace Helen Burgess.”

I try to keep listening but my mind wanders elsewhere. He chose her. Not me. I’m the one keeping myself trapped in this world. I chose to come back. It’s my fault for feeling this way. But it’s fine. Isn’t it?

Same routine as all my brothers’ weddings. I do, I do, kiss the bride, cheers. What’s different about this wedding is that the cheers seem one-sided. All of Thomas’ family jumps to their feet and shouts with delight, while the other side remains seated and claps. Thankfully Finn sees my discomfort and drags me outside. Everyone files out after us. The bouquet is tossed and all the single women scramble to wrestle over it.

“Fight! Fight! Fight!” Finn and I chant.

“Verena, are you edging them on?” John asks.

I smile sheepishly. “Only a little.”

“Why don’t you try?” Finn asks.

I scoff at his attempt at a joke. “Oh, please. I hardly believe in such superstitious nonsense.”

“Says the woman who won’t sleep without a cross above the bed.”

“Hey! It’s religious, not superstitious.”

Finn shrugs. “Maybe there’s a blend?”

Thomas shouts for everyone to gather and a photographer readies himself in front.

“Go on, take the photograph!” Arthur says.

I’m pushed to the side by Grace’s family and before I can protest the camera flashes. Everyone’s thinking it. I don’t belong here. I could have refused. The only reason I decided to attend was to support Thomas and his family. But she’s part of their family now and more than likely I won't be welcomed as often. 

Oh, my mistake. Pair the gossiping barmaid with the blood-thirsty gangster? They’re perfect for each other! He’s married. It’s done. I can’t have him. I need to let him go.

@meadows5

[atopvisenyashill]

general thoughts

the way joffrey still refers to sansa as his lady….him being almost impressed with her supposed cruelty towards dontos…the fact that we literally don’t see dontos again………cregan 0.5 omg

i love how much myrcella loves her uncle tyrion tbh i do think they capture the very weird lannister dynamic of only cersei & tywin being hostile to tyrion quite well hu giving him scenes where he’s just chillin w the little ones

i love this first convo between cersei & tyrion. tyrion is like, Almost trying to do a “it’s us against your problems cersei don’t you see i’m trying to help” but as always he is too sharp & sets her on edge & makes her fearful she’s about to be made powerless again when she just rid herself of robert. he tries to put her at ease, and you see her relax just slightly. also love how peter has clearly started getting a handle on the accent lmao the way he quickly drawls out “you love your children, it’s your one redeeming quality THAT AND YOUR CHEEKBONES” hilarious. love how tyrion can’t help but call cersei beautiful even when he’s annoyed with her.

BRAN LEARNING HOW TO RULE SCENE.

we really got two sex scenes back to back omg. this scene with ros was so stupid. i hate sexposition i think it’s so fucking lazy.

I LOVE THE RIVERLANDS KIDS I LOVE A GAGGLE OF RASCALS I LOVE ARYA SETTING UP HOT PIE FOR GENDRY AND GENDRY GOING FOR THE KILL SEAMLESSLY I LOVE THAT HOT PIE AND LOMMY LEAVE ALL HUFFY I LOVE ARYA FOLLOWING GENDRY AROUND AND BADGERING HIM AND HIS GIGGLE WHEN SHE PUSHES HIM I AM A GENDRYA TRUTHER they really did their big one casting the kids

can i say something about yara……i think gemma whalen was really miscast for this part

“You want me to have a god? Fine. King Stanis is my God. He raised me up I’m blessed me with his trust. He gave you a future I could never have imagined.  You know how to read. You’ll be at knight one day.  You think a fire god commanded all that? No, it was Stannis. Only Stannis.” <- WAIT WAIT WAIT. DAVOS KILLING STANNIS HIS GOD FOR BURNING SHIREEN CONFIRMED❓

changes i noticed

the way they only gave rakharo some characterization so dany could cry more about his murder is absolutely goddamn nauseating. they had the perfect opportunity to really dig into dany’s feelings in her khalasar and bloodriders specifically here and passed it up for cheap shock value murder. i’ve always found rakharo fascinating because of his devotion to dany - it goes so against the culture of the dothraki to be not just so dedicated to a woman but willingly subservient, and rakharo is not only fond of dany from the jump, he’s the only bloodrider who attempts to comfort her when she proclaims herself leader of the khalasar. i’ve always felt that like arys oakheart, he likely was raised with a mother who had some semblance of control & power and it made him predisposed to respect the backbone he sees in dany, to feel sorrow for her frustration at being forced to the dosh khaleen, and giving him that “you’ve never failed me before” “now would be a bad time to start” COULD have been something interesting wrt the dothraki and specifically irri & rakharo helping her release drogon in astapor and sack the city, and rule meereen but they waste it and elyes gabel’s amazing face and acting chops. annoying.

“i haven’t seen a girl in six months” once again. why must we make sam this horny.

and then following it up with my favorite sam line & the funniest delivery kit ever does aksjdj the way he goes “hello gilly. what are you doing sam” always kills me, and then following it up with “i can’t steal her she’s a person not a goat” that’s my baby!!! it’s so annoying that they adapt sam so badly but they get the sam/gilly dynamic down okay. he’s just like. the perfect person to be there for gilly, the perfect person to never give up in just trying to help her however he could.

theon is so pathetic lmao. i get some of the changes - big cast and all that - but i think cutting down theon’s journey on pike so he’s not dealing with the botleys & doesn’t get wex pyke makes the iron islands feel so much less real & lived in.

I know everyone hates on the change with joffrey ordering the killing of the bastards and not cersei BUT i think it’s fine, i get it even. they’re using it to show joffrey is escalating, not even cersei can control him, AND cersei will cover for him always. she looks unsettled when tyrion brings it up but she rationalizes it away and then turns the conversation back on tyrion. also-

THEY DESERVED AN EGOT FOR THESE ROLES!!!!!! GIVE THEM A PULITZER!!!!!

[cosmereplay]

Day 12: Karma

Rated Teen, Leshwi/transfem!Kaladin, post-RoW. Kaladin’s egg breaks. This’ll be part 1 of 3, part 2 will be coming up on the 18th!

“Kill me,” Leshwi said to the Rhythm of Hope, as Kaladin’s speartip hovered just below her chin. 

“No,” he smiled.

They had taken time away from their new responsibilities to spar. This time, he had come to her at the Listener enclave. Their duel had taken them deep into a chasm of the Shattered Plains, chasing each other around impossible turns. It had been exhilarating. 

She hadn't known she could still feel alive until she'd fought him. And now she didn’t know if she would get another life after this one. It made her feel frail, vulnerable–mortal.  

And yet in moments like this, especially with Kaladin, Leshwi's memories of the endless cycles of war and imprisonment on Braize seemed distant. She felt like the whole world was new, and that she hadn’t just been reborn, she’d been renewed. She felt totally free.

One of the things she chose to do with that freedom was spar with Kaladin. For so long, no one had come close to her level of skill, and in this life she had actually learned from Kaladin. Like today, he had used some kind of grappling move on her, flipping her through the air until she’d landed flat on her back, and he’d straddled her waist, his weight pressing her into the stone. Though he sat heavy on top of her, she didn’t feel the sting of defeat, just the thrill of the contest. They made an incredible match.

“Kill me,” she insisted, riding the Rhythm of Confidence. “Give me a reason to find a body you would like more.”

He blinked in confusion, and his grip on the spear tightened. “What do you mean?” he asked.

“A woman’s body, so I can entice you. Normally I am not picky about the body I receive, but…my passion has changed.” So, so much had changed.

“I…That would be too great a risk, Leshwi. Odium would torture you.”

“I would find a way to escape Braize. I would find my way back to you,” she said, forcing Confidence.

Slowly, his whole body relaxed, and he dismissed his spear. He looked down, then rested his hands on her broad, flat chest, splaying out his fingers across her carapace. “Leshwi, it’s an honour that you would do that for me, but it wouldn’t be necessary. You…you’re…ah…I’m enticed anyway.” He stared at his hands for a moment, then glanced at her. “Sorry,” he said quickly, and scrambled off her. He looked away awkwardly, then turned back to offer his hand to help her stand.

Leshwi attuned Reconciliation and kept holding his hand, even after she’d stood. This was something new and delicate, too. She felt so free much of the time, sometimes she forgot how stuck she really was. “Perhaps I’ve spoken to Confidence when I should have spoken to Consideration. But I am femalen, Kaladin, in a malen’s body. I wish to respect you and your human culture, and so I should approach you in a femalen body.”

“That doesn’t matter to me. You’re femalen no matter what body you’re in,” he said to Confidence. Slowly, his brow furrowed in an expression Leshwi couldn’t name, and he looked away, taking a deep breath. He seemed pained, perhaps.

She hummed to Reconciliation, then bared her teeth in the human version of the rhythm. “Thank you, Kaladin. In that case, I wish to court you.”

He looked up at her with wide eyes, and he stammered, his face changing colour. 

Leshwi thought perhaps she’d made another error. “Oh, yes, men are the ones who usually request to court. I hope I have not dishonoured you?” she said. I will be making much use of Reconciliation today, she thought.

“I…thank you Leshwi, but…I need some time to think,” he said, and turned to fly back to the enclave. 

She followed, humming Resignation. She had made too grand a gesture, close to swearing an oath she probably couldn’t keep, and then she had pained him in some way. But, keeping in mind he hadn’t said no yet, she forced herself to attune Resolve instead.

He remained silent and distant, even until he left to return to Urithiru. She hummed Resolve as she watched him leave through the Oathgate, determined to wait until he approached her again. 

[hellomisst]

Stone Blind by Natalie Haynes is such a missed opportunity that it is disappointing

I picked Stone Blind in the bookstore as a chill read, but I was expecting to be swept away like how Circe by Madeline Miller did. Stone Blind, according to the synopsis, is about Medusa and her story; it is a retelling, a reimagining. A "fresh" take. Well, for starters, it is not.

It is not difficult to please any reader like me. I never had a book completely disappoint me in all the years I've read. I'm 24 now, and I started reading books when I was like 10. All I want is for a book to entertain me enough to give my mind a leisurely ride while keeping it relaxed, to give me something new to think about and wonder for awhile, or to completely mind-blow me if it is really that good.

This book did nothing of any sort. There are a LOT of lapses in the story because it tried to do a lot of things at once, but it failed to neatly and cleanly pack it all up in the end. It seems that this book did not understand the Ancient Greek culture at all. Even the Greek gods did not seem to have any solid personality in this book. The characters all felt so shallow. Stone Blind is simply literally retelling what anyone with basic knowledge of the Greek mythology already knows, and put some dialogues there to fill in some blank spots.

Spoilers beyond this line.

Now, before we continue, let me tell you that I am not attempting to make an unbiased review of the book. I am writing this as someone who has immersed herself in Greek mythology as a kid, as someone who wanted a pleasant read while having her finals week in the university, as someone who simply wanted something new to think about, and as a woman who enjoys a good feminist retelling of a story of a woman in fiction who was demonized through out history.

Stone Blind promised a "fresh take" of Medusa, "the original monstered woman." As said, there was nothing fresh in the book's take. Nothing revitalized. Nothing reconstructed. The dialogues were mostly bland; the characters, barely there. It did not even feel like Medusa was the main character. It was basically a story of Athene at first, then Perseus. Many parts of the story were unnecessary to the point that you would forget something else happened because they were barely relevant halfway in the story and/ or in the end.

One good point I have for Stone Blind is that when someone is raped, the author really uses the word "rape". At first, I thought maybe this is the lack of creativity and/ or better words, but then I realized that she wants to say it as it is so that there would be no other interpretation, no misunderstanding, and no more debate as to what really happened. That is the only good point I have for this book.

But my main complaints? Let us enumerate them:

First, everyone—Panopeia (whoever that is in the story; the chapter was named Panopeia but it was not in the list of characters even when the olive grove and a random crow made it there), Athene, Hermes, and Gorgoneion (apparently Medusa's head but you would not know until Medusa gets beheaded and says it herself)—or shall I say, the author herself, kept forcing the readers to hate Perseus. Gorgoneion had chapters dedicated to shitting on Perseus: "You're probably feeling sorry for him now, aren't you? Poor little Perseus, the reluctant hero. Defender of his mother's honor. Boastful little fool..." Knowing that Gorgneion is Medusa's head might let us know that she hates Perseus because he killed Medusa, that is true. But the thing is, it is not only Medusa who keeps saying that Perseus is arrogant, whiney, incompetent, foolish, annoying, and more. Even Athene, as a narrator and a character, and Hermes said it. Basically anyone who has interacted with Perseus and narrated the story said it. So it must be true, right? But is that how you write a story? Sure, they all keep saying that Perseus is all that and does not deserve to be called a hero, but they fail to show the audience how! It keeps being said but it is not shown. The author wants us to hate Perseus by saying it but does not show us why.

This is where it feels like the book fails to understand Ancient Greek culture. The point about Perseus being an annoying and arrogant little prick circles around the fact that he wants to set out on a quest to get Medusa's head but he does not know what a gorgon is, what to do, where to go, and all that shit. He also "complains a lot" and when he got Medusa's head, he "liked killing people" and became "arrogant". First, honor and pride are the center of Ancient Greek stories, characters, and heroes. This is why Greek gods and goddesses intervene in wars and quests. This is basic in any Greek mythology thing! And even without these values, of course Perseus would not want his mother to be taken by any man, even by a king! Why would we fault Perseus with that? Gorgoneion kept saying in one chapter that had Perseus not intervened, the king would have grown tired of Danae (Perseus' mother) and would have cast her aside because he was not interested in her anyway; he just wanted whatever his brother, Dictys, had (Danae and Perseus was taken in by Dictys when they escaped Danae's kingdom long ago). But how would Perseus know that? All Perseus knew, as a 16-year old boy, was that their peaceful life was disturbed by a king and now the king wants his mother. What child would not want to do anything and everything to intervene, Ancient Greek mythology character or not?

Next, Perseus was sixteen! A child! An Ancient Greek child, at that. Of course, he would not know what a gorgon was, where Nereids lived, what he needs to behead a gorgon, and all those things. He did not grow up as a prince being educated on what gods, goddesses, and monsters looked like; he grew up in a fishermen's village learning how to live day by day beside a sea! He was well-taken care of by Danae and Dictys, of course he was mostly comfortable in life. Of course, he would complain when there are painful and uncomfortable moments in his quest! Anyone would! Anyone would grow frustrated and complain when they do not know stuff, but know that they have to do something or else their parent would be taken away, but somehow they keep failing and/ or getting lost! It was stupid, yes, to set out not figuring things out first, but if you were given only two months to do something known as impossible with your parent's freedom at stake and with no one else to support you (even Dictys did not speak against the king, his own brother), even you would go impulsive.

In moments in which Perseus does something abhorrent, his actions seem random and forced, just so they can say that he is bad. For example, Perseus used Medusa's head to turn someone to stone when they denied him food and lodging. They said he had to get the king's, Atlas', permission first and the directions they gave him was lengthy and confusing that it annoyed him, so he turned them to stone.

In the end, most of his being annoying and whiney can be attributed to the fact that he is just sixteen but he feels that he has to do something impossible to save his mother. His being arrogant can be attributed to the fact that he is just sixteen yet he killed and outsmarted gorgons with the help and favor of the gods. He was also mostly kept company by gods who are known to be arrogant. Now, I am not in any way defending Perseus—I know Ancient Greek men in the mythology are shitty—but this is how I view the author's persistent shoving in the face of Perseus being a prick. The author keeps taking Greek mythology out of context; Stone Blind keeps being pulled to modern world and standards that it cast aside the context and nuances of Ancient Greece and Greek mythology. It is not impossible to apply modern idealogoies like feminism in Greek mythology; Circe by Madeline Miller did it. Proper contextualization and a good understanding of Greek mythology can do the trick. And in the case of Medusa? It should have not been difficult at all. Common people on the internet have done it! Medusa has already become an icon for survivors of abuse and harassment. How did the retelling of Medusa's story in Stone Blind fail in this?

Second, how did a book claiming to put women at the center fail to write women in better light? Stone Blind kept trying so hard to say "men bad" but in the end, it seems like Athene was the villain and Medusa was no better than the Perseus she kept insulting; and no man faced any consequence nor retribution. Retelling and reimagining a classic, an ancient story already gives you the edge to make a difference, to send a better message, yet Stone Blind failed so miserably. Sure, maybe the idea was that, "if men can be so bad they can kill anyone, maybe my being vengeful and heartless as a woman is not so bad?" But if this is so, then it all becomes so wrong. How is Medusa's "killing" people "empowering" for women when in the end, she was just a weapon used by Perseus that she did not even have the agency to choose when and who to kill?

The root of it all was Poseidon. Poseidon violated Medusa in Athene's temple. But Athene cannot directly offend Poseidon, so she goes to Medusa, the easier target. Poseidon tricked Hephaestus to take Athene as a bride. Zeus blessed the idea. Hephaestus violates Athene. Athene takes Athens to offend Poseidon. And that is it. Athene did not even craft any long-term plan to take vengeance on Poseidon, the root of it all. And what of Hephaestus? What was the purpose of that scene!? Sure, that was part of the real mythology, but in this book, what was the purpose? If it was to show that even goddesses are not safe from the evilness of men, that even Athene, the one who cursed Medusa for Poseidon's sin, knew how it felt to be harassed, then why did she not change her thoughts about Medusa and her curse? Why did she not change her perspective on women? Because she is an Olympian and Olympians are arrogant? Or is all this just so that the author can retell the story of how Athens became Athene's, and then the olive grove, Elaia, can narrate a small part of the story that is not all that significant anyway? Such a missed opportunity to change the tides in Medusa's story. Women tore each other down; men stood unaffected by their own actions and the consequences.

Then there was also this small appearance of a woman who could have done something: Amphitrite, the wife of Poseidon. According to Stone Blind, Amphitrite was pursued by Poseidon nonstop until she gave up hiding and just gave in. So she knew how Poseidon is. And she knew Medusa caught Poseidon's eyes. The book said, "...she wondered if she should warn the Gorgons of the danger their sister is in." What was the purpose of this line, or the whole chapter's thought, for that matter? To show that the own wife of Poseidon became his wife because he would not stop going after her, even after rejection? To show that Amphitrite also went through what Medusa was about to go through? And then what? Nothing.

Gaia, the titan goddess of earth, was also introduced. During that pointless titan vs. gods war, Gaia was introduced as a mother who wanted to help her titan children, but was immediately defeated by Zeus through god-knows-what. And that war, my god, what was that for!? If that was only to introduce Gaia and allow her to get Hephaestus' semen (from Athene's discarded cloth when she wiped herself after the harassment) and create a child out of it for revenge to Athene, and for that child to grow and help in settling to whom Athens will go to, then it really was not that important. Because: how is this relevant to Medusa?

More on the lack of better characterization of women? Let us talk about Cassiope and Andromeda! Cassiope, and her husband, the king Cepheus, wanted Andromeda to marry Cepheus' brother, an old man. Andromeda vehemently refused, Cassiope felt her loss of power and beauty, and so she blasphemed saying she is more beautiful, if not as beautiful, as the Nereids. The Nereids got offended by her hubris and demanded Poseidon to punish their kingdom. The kingdom gets flooded, and they demanded a sacrifice as an offering to appease them: Andromeda. Andromeda, before getting eaten by the sea monster who was apparently Medusa's mother, gets rescued by Perseus... by using Medusa's head to turn the sea monster to stone. Andromeda, then, wanted to marry Perseus, but Cepheus and Cassiope have doubts. They are correct in having doubts in him, because in Stone Blind, Perseus is said to be bad. But Andromeda refuses to listen nor believe in them because she no longer wants other people to dictate her marriage, which is good for her! She wants what she wants. But in the end, she still is not better than Cassiope because she also believes Cassiope is at fault. She is, but Cepheus' inaction should have been just as bad. What makes their story difficult to follow is how women in this story immediately face terrible consequences for relatively small offenses, while men do not; and it is also women who punish and look down on them. And again, what was the purpose of Cassiope's vanity and hubris in the run of Medusa's story? To show excess vanity can lead to hubris and a godly offense? To make Medusa meet her mother? But then, what was the point of Medusa meeting her mother? For her to think, "Why did I not close my eyes?" Why not, indeed?

Do note that I know this all sounds like I am putting the responsibility on women, rather than men. But remember: the author kept explicitly saying "men bad" (and so far men really did bad things and/ or stood by on the side when something was happening, so that checks out); and if this is a book meant to focus on women and retell their stories, then women should have been written better and differently from their original accounts. But so far, nothing. They were all as they originally were. And they stood by, like the men, when something happened to their fellow women.

Third, the characters are bland and are mischaracterized. The only good people depicted who are relevant to Medusa are her sisters, her fellow gorgons. They are also the only characters who have personalities. They even have more agency than the supposed main character, Medusa. Other than that, Perseus, we already talked about him; Dictys, introduced as a kind protector of women who wash up on the beach, but suddenly did not defend Danae when the king wanted her as his wife? He was kind enough to take them in, wise enough to move away from his king of a brother when he was clearly unwanted and it seemed he induces paranoia in him brought about by insecurity and envy; but when the king himself shows up and claims that he wants Danae, who Dictys said that he sees as his own daughter, for himself, he suddenly cannot speak against him? Changing a character's personality so suddenly to drive the story forward?

Now, about the gods. The gods, the Olympians, are only depicted as one thing: arrogant and prideful. All of them. Gods and goddesses alike. No other personality. And so when Athene and Hermes were made to banter, it comes off all wrong, weird, and irrelevant. Sometimes, the author tries to put humor in Athene, but it is just wrong and out of character. One time, the author made her whiney and childlike when she demanded a "thing" because all other gods have a "thing", it felt so out of character because throughout the story, she was just serious and arrogant. But then this scene happens just to show how Zeus made owls her thing. And owls did not even become relevant in the story (though a crow randomly narrated a chapter). This might have been there to show dimensions and depth of Athene as a character, but it just failed because: it did not become relevant.

The ending also felt so weird and out of character for Athene. Athene, the goddess of wisdom, literal brainchild of Zeus, who should be serious, sure, and always knowledgeable, for some reason, does not know the extent and capabilities of the curse she herself put on Medusa! What the fuck was that? She wanted Medusa to "change her back"; Athene accidentally turned a priestess of her temple to stone because the priestess looked into Athene's breastplate where she put Medusa's head. One, how does the goddess of wisdom accidentally turn someone to stone because she forgot she was wearing Medusa's head and regret it? Two, how does the goddess of wisdom not know her own curse that she herself put on someone? Three, how does the goddess of wisdom forget that that happened a century ago, and not know a century, a year is longer than an hour? And four, how does the goddess of wisdom, an Olympian, not know when a torch is lit not for her but for the priestess she turned to stone?

More than that, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, Athene wants a home, but not the temples nor Olympus. She felt homesick and lonely. But why? How? Nowhere in the story did it say nor show that she felt anything of the sort. And she opens this up to Medusa, and allows Medusa to turn her to stone. Why? In this kind of ending, what and where is the resolution?

Lastly, all Medusa was in this story is still a helpless gorgon whose agency in her own story was so minimal that she was not able to change her own fate. She even turned her own mother to stone, and then thought, "Why did I not close my eyes?" The same question I kept thinking of every time Perseus takes her head out of the bag and uses her as a weapon. When Medusa was first beheaded, she made sure to look at the ground only to avoid turning anyone else to stone, but wanted Perseus to accidentally look because she was so angry she wanted to turn him to stone. The first time Perseus took her out to turn people to stone, Medusa felt too powerful and seemed to regret it. I thought, as a revenge and to finally make her own move and decisions, she would maybe start closing her eyes whenever she is taken out by Perseus. But no. I thought, maybe it is because she claims to no longer be the Medusa who cares for mortals. Because a mortal killed her, she no longer feels sympathy and no longe cares when she kills mortals. Alright. But then, I thought you hated Perseus, so why allow him to continually use you as a weapon? Why agree to be used by him and help him succeed?

Eventually, I realized how everyone in the story is an unreliable narrator, especially Gorgoneion aka Medusa/ Medusa's head. That would have been fine if not for the fact that the characters themselves are mischaracterized throughout the story. And to make things worse, why are other characters, mainly men, and other storylines used for Medusa's story to progress? The only reason I can think for this is that the author herself does not understand Greek mythology, Ancient Greece, and the values upheld by Ancient Greeks (at least, in the mythology) well enough to apply modern ideologies in it and so she did not know what to do with Medusa in Medusa's story herself.

[littlemuoi]

The tiny woman with dazzling blue eyes who turned me from a republican to a royalist by Louis de Bernières (September 2nd 2023)

Somewhere in my possession I have a snotty letter I wrote to my mother from university about not being interested in the Queen's 1977 anniversary. I was a young philosophy student at the time and being enthusiastic about the Monarchy was definitely not cool, especially as there was some kudos to be accrued from pretending to be Leftist.

I found myself puzzled and irritated by all the street parties and general celebrations, as if it was nothing to do with me. A few years earlier I had 'enjoyed' five months of officer training at Sandhurst where I had to swear allegiance to the Queen, her heirs and successors and I remember protesting inwardly that if one were to fight, it should be for a cause and not for a person.

However, in the 1990s I won the Commonwealth Writers Prize in three of its iterations. It meant that I had had my books chosen not by the usual London literati, with whom I have never been in favour, but by judges from all over Africa, Asia and indeed the world.

As I found out, the Queen's great passion was for the Commonwealth rather than Great Britain. It had been the means whereby the British Empire had miraculously and almost seamlessly transformed itself into a cultural and diplomatic club, so successfully that by the end of the Queen's reign there were countries in it that had never been in the Empire at all.

As the head of it, the Queen had, let's face the truth, literally charmed a succession of heads of state out of any post-colonial resentment that may have been niggling away inside of them.

She treated them with love and respect and had her love and respect returned. Julius Nyerere [Tanzania's leader] and Nelson Mandela are examples of two people who became close to her.

One of the perks of winning that writers prize was that the winners in all the categories were invited to Buckingham Palace to meet the Queen. You were advised about steps to be taken, how to bow and so on, and then you went in.

Some people are apparently tongue-tied and terrified but I found myself face-to-face with a tiny woman in sparkly clothes, with dazzlingly blue eyes, perfect complexion and a smile that seemed to break her face in half.

If you said anything boring or inane, she would say: 'How fascinating.' She made a joke about somebody important and self-important she had just met, which I am honour-bound not to repeat.

Her voice and turns of phrase were just like my mother's, they being of the same vintage. My problem was not that I was terrified or tongue-tied but that I felt warmly enough, relaxed enough, to want to be over-familiar. As the cliché goes, I went in a republican and came out a royalist.

I remembered how I had adored her as a little boy because she was so outstandingly pretty, and now I reflected that perhaps my previous resentment of her had been nothing more than the pique of somebody who had no hope of ever entering such a charmed circle.

Now that I had entered it for a few minutes, all the pique and sullenness suddenly evaporated.

If you had met the Queen, you assumed that she really wanted to know you and would become a little sad when no more invitations ever arrived. I was relatively lucky in winning that prize three times because I automatically got to see her three years running. Somebody told me she'd read my book Captain Corelli's Mandolin on a long flight to New Zealand but I have no idea if that is true or who told me; perhaps it was a lady-in-waiting.

There was one present on one occasion with a fag in her hand and I remember thinking: 'The Queen must be very tolerant to put up with that.' I bent down to pat the dogs when I should have been talking to her but she seemed unperturbed, as she was when I trod on one and made it squeal.

She had recently invented the Dorgi and was pleased about it.

I can no longer remember the order of things. As I drove (and still do) a Morris Minor, and had even worked as a mechanic in a Morris Minor garage for a year, I had been able to rescue a young woman in a broken down Morris near Richmond Park, who worked for the Royal Academy.

Thereafter I received free invitations to everything as long as she worked there. There was a do where I found myself in the company of the likes of Paul McCartney and Brian May, who are both outstandingly tall, but no one was talking to me until the Queen spotted me and made a beeline.

She was ever conscious of the number of people she had to talk to and would end her conversations very suddenly, even a very entertaining one, by suddenly turning her head to one side. Then the rest of her body would swivel sideways and she was off, like someone in a hurry to catch a train. It should have been very rude but it was both comical and endearing.

She had a party for poets at Buckingham Palace, which struck me as a dangerous and peculiar idea. I was standing with another poet when the Master of the Household approached me and said: 'Don't move, the Queen wants to have a chat with you.'

There was another beeline, another brief conversation, another swivel of the head, another charging away. I got on so well with the Master of the Household that we are still friends years later.

She had a party at Windsor Castle that was, I believe, the first after its restoration. She looked out across the courtyard at my Morris Minor Traveller and said: 'Goodness, we haven't had one of those here for years.'

The dinner party was a kind of glamorous sleepover. My luggage was unpacked for me by a valet who was very unimpressed that I was going to wear the same white shirt to dinner as the one in which I had arrived. 'Economising on effort I see,' he said drily.

The dinner was on silver plates. I hope I have not made that up. I was sitting next to Prince Andrew to begin with and we chatted about golf. I liked him and had no reason not to.

I eavesdropped on the German Ambassador talking to Tony Blair and I was impressed. When the latter stood up to leave with the ladies, the laughing Queen ushered him back into the room with her hand in the middle of his back.

I was struck by how frugal her appetite was; she was no trencherwoman. In her position and with such good cooks, I would have been the most massively globular monarchical flumper that the world has ever known, considerably larger than Edward IV and Henry VIII and Edward VII combined.

I spent the next morning in her library. She had many genealogy books and I found one with an inscription by Winston Churchill, so flowery, elaborate and humble that I felt guilty and embarrassed about the cheery informality of my own exploits on the flyleaf.

There was another party at Windsor for people 'in the Arts'. The Irish poet Seamus Heaney was there, surrounded by admiring young poets. 'Your passport may be green,' I thought, 'but you're as much a sucker for all this as anyone else is, aren't you?' The last time I saw the Queen was when she invited me to lunch at the palace. I think she had had a notion to invite a few people from each county one after the other, so as to work her way around the entire country. One of the guests was a fireman.

On the way, the sole of my shoe came off and I had to buy a new pair from a shop in Oxford Street.

At the gathering beforehand I had a conversation with the Duke of Edinburgh, about death. He said that the older one got, the more one was forced to contemplate it.

I liked him. He was intelligent and humorous, a man who clearly saw the absurdity of pretty much everything. He once teased me about being a novelist and a poet, as if it were altogether unnecessarily too much to do two such fatuous things in the same lifetime.

The Queen had a system for making things happen, which was that she would make a sudden move. When I was talking to the Duke, he suddenly stiffened and looked up because the Queen had made her 'action stations' move, just as I was asking him if he spoke Greek. She said: 'Well, do you speak French?'

I found myself sitting at her right hand side and during my half of her attention (she would switch halfway through a meal) we talked, among other things, about speaking French. We talked about Norfolk and I entertained a brief fantasy of being invited to Sandringham.

I think I may have disgraced myself by taking two quail breasts from the dish. She had only taken one but they are terribly small.

Afterwards I was standing at the gate of the palace when she whizzed out on her next mission, without even the slightest break or smidgen of a snooze. I was standing next to an armed policeman in all the gear and he suddenly looked down at me and asked: 'Ere, do you live in Denton?' I said, 'Yes, how did you know?' He relied: 'I beat you in the Father's Race.' I said: 'It was my sandals. I'd have won if I hadn't tripped up on the finishing line.'

While the Queen was hurtling off to her next appointment, I fell asleep on a bench in Hyde Park to recover from lunch.

That was the last time I saw her, waving from her car.

Thereafter I sent her books via my friend the Master. Books from their authors are just about the only gifts the Royal Family are allowed to receive. We have a large room in my house that we call 'The Queen's Room' because I used to tell my children that that's where we'd put her if she came to stay.

One day my little daughter wrote her a letter inviting her to stay, telling her that we had a very glamorous bathroom, and received a reply about being too busy. I don't think Sophie ever forgave her, and might even still be a republican.

I don't think it is possible to make a friend of anyone in the Royal Family, or make any assumptions if they are kind to you or seem interested in you. All that can happen is the occasional flash of communication or warmth that gives you a glimpse of the person within.

Princess Anne is intelligent and direct, the Duke of Edinburgh had a philosophical turn. The question is, what do they get from us?

I think the Queen mostly enjoyed herself because her enjoyment coincided with her duty. There was an eagerness in her manner as she suddenly looked away and shot off to talk to somebody else.

It's her heirs and successors I worry about. We, their subjects, are just going to try to make them as miserable as we can, aren't we? We are too chippy to speak generously of them and we are piqued about not being royalty ourselves. I found that having encountered the Queen, I was unable to be impressed by anyone else. Madonna invited me to lunch once and I still don't know why. I said no because I had a commitment in Northern Ireland. Sting wanted me to fly to Milan to interview him and I don't know why I said no to that either.

I've met many of my heroes, I've shaken hands with Nicolas Cage and President Clinton and been kissed on the cheek by Penelope Cruz. Only being kissed on the cheek by Penelope comes anywhere close to meeting the Queen.

[retrolunaz]

The Diamond of the Season - Bridgerton Kpop AU - The Beginning

genre: historical, fluff-ish, angst (?), slow burn

pairing: duke!hueningkai x oc

warnings: murder, obsession, yandere themes (?)

word count: 3.5k

Backstory

Rios de Artemisa. That was a last name known and revered all throughout the island of Cuba. A family owning a large portion of the nation's nickel production, they were respected as businessmen and people of high class. That is, until the patriarch's, Vicente's, untimely death due to tuberculosis. This caused a great strain on the family. The eldest, Santiago, had to inherit the business. Without the proper training, he was more than naive on that front, and the nickel mines were quickly losing money. The next step was to send his sisters out into society to find them the correct match. Solana was the first to go, being 19 years old. The best way to find a suitor with the proper amount of knowledge would be to take advantage of the Naming of the Season's Diamond. Surely it would make Solana more desirable to any suitors.

Solana was nervously playing with her fingers as she was waiting for the carriage to arrive at the Danbury estate. Her and her family had been travelling by ship for the entire month of March in order to get to England and were finally able to travel by land. Thankfully, her mother had been friends with Lady Danbury for years before her marriage, so she was more than willing to sponsor the young girl for this season. To say Solana was nervous was an understatement. She had always imagined her debut to be in Cuba, marrying a man of her culture whom she could relate to. Solana was dragged out of her thoughts by the voice of the carriage driver.

"We have arrived. Please step out of the carriage," he said. The door was opened for them and the entire family stepped out of the carriage. Entire family meaning Luz, the mother who was absolutely destroyed by the death of Vincente but nonetheless knew that life had to go on, Santiago, the 24-year-old brother who now had to inherit the family business and take charge of the future of his sisters, Pilar, the 16-year-old who had an affinity for writing and painting and seemed to have no interest in her future debut, and Alonso, 15, who was more interested in hunting than taking after his brother. There were also Adanelia and Serafina, 13 and 10, who spent their days reading and horseback-riding.

Lady Danbury was waiting at the giant front doors with open arms.

"Welcome welcome," she said as she walked up to Luz. She greeted her as old family friends and turned to look at Solana. "Look at you, if you are not named the Diamond then the Queen must have problems in her vision. What are your talents, girl?" she asked, moving Solana around and touching her hips and hair.

"I can speak Spanish, English, Russian, German, and Portuguese. I am well-versed in foreign affairs. I can play the piano, guitar, and I can dance quite well." Solana explained. Lady Danbury gave an approving night.

"Well, seeing as it is already nighttime, you all must make haste and prepare for dinner. We have a long day tomorrow and I would like to speak of it on a full stomach." Lady Danbury motioned for the servants to take the many pounds of luggage to the respective rooms of each family member. Solana curtsied and scurried away, following the servants carrying her stuff to her room.

The room itself was gorgeous. It was filled with anything a young woman would need: a vanity, a plush bed, a long mirror for clothing, and a golden bathtub for whenever she felt she needed to refresh. Solana plopped down on the bed and took a moment to relax. Her life as she knew it tomorrow would change completely. She was afraid of not being named the Diamond and disappointing Lady Danbury in the process. The servants knocked on the door and left her luggages in the corner of the room. The males left and the female servants prepared to change Solana out of her travel clothes. In front of the mirror, they took off her dress and undergarments. It was such a relief, she had been in those clothes for hours beforehand and was more than ready to change into a different set. They changed her into a simple blue silk dress with lace embellishments and braided her hair. Solana could not wait to go eat. She was famished and had only been eating snacks beforehand.

"You're all set, Miss Rios. The dinner is ready, so please go downstairs into the dining room. Lady Danbury is waiting for you." said one of the servants, Aymee. Solana nodded, thanked her, and made her way downstairs. Once in the dining room, she sat down next to her mother and Serafina. The dinner in front of them was hot and fresh, and she was ready to dig in, and dig in she did.

"Alright, it is time we discuss what will happen tomorrow. Solana, I will need you to try your best to impress the Queen. She likes people who are intelligent yet delicate. Your beauty is not going to be questioned, but your talents need to be up to standards. Do not say anything out of line, do NOT try to outsmart her, and do your best to leave a good and lasting impression," Lady Danbury explained. Solana nodded in agreement. She knew she had to do her best.

Aymee was doing Solana's hair in the most intricate style. Her hair was styled into a full low bun with braids on the side and face-framing curls. As the final touch, Aymee added pearls into the braids and one large white feather into the bun. Her ears and neck were adorned with pearled jewelry and her makeup was simple yet accentuated her big eyes and plump lips. But the most important part was arguably the dress. Solana was dressed in a beautifully decorated white and gold dress that had aspects of her culture in it, most notably the hibiscus motifs sewn onto the chest area with gold thread and small diamonds. Her gloves were white and lacy with ruffles on the ends of them.

"Miss, you look so beautiful. If you are not announced to be the Diamond of the Season then I believe there is no hope for anybody else in all of London." Aymee had a habit of complimenting Solana all the time. Not that she was complaining, however. It served as a huge boost to her confidence.

The family was quickly getting into the carriage getting ready to go to the Queen's palace. Solana could not stop picking at her cuticles out of nervousness. Pilar noticed this and held her sisters hands in order to prevent her from picking it until she bled.

"I am sure you will do fine, Solana. Trust in yourself. You are going to impress the Queen and you will find a good husband I believe in you okay? Do not worry," she comforted. This helped Solana a little bit, but the nerves came rushing back when the carriage seized movement. The door opened and Solana was met with the view of crowds of girls her age dressed in similar attire. The feathers made the debutantes stand out in the large groups of women excited to see how this event would turn out. The family walked out of the carriage and into the room where the event will be held. So many girls were waiting anxiously for the event to begin. At the end of a small walkway was the Queen and her ladies in waiting, looking ever so intimidating. Solana's breath caught in her throat as the announcer began calling names. Girl after girl walked down the carpet only to be shooed away by a disappointed Queen Charlotte.

"Miss Audrey Orphicton," he said. A young lady with golden hair and striking green eyes walking down the pathway gracefully towards the Queen. She bowed towards the Queen and the Queen looked at her inquisitively. She admired the girl's features, her posture, her poise. For a moment, it seemed Solana had been beat before she even had a chance to show herself. After giving Audrey false hope, the Queen shooed her away as she had done with the others. Solana was growing inpatient until her name was suddenly called.

"Miss Solana Rios de Artemisa," he said. She felt faint. Her body started sweating. Not the wet kind, but the kind where your body becomes hot and itchy. But she had to get past that. She took a deep breath and walked down the pathway, careful of her posture and eye contact. She wanted to look sweat and confident but not too confident where she looked intimidating. She got up to the bottom of the Queen's throne and bowed. Her heart was racing at a million miles an hour. She could not mess this up. If she did, their entire plan would be for nothing and the season would be much more difficult. There was a silence in the room. If anyone's feather fell out of their hair, it would make a loud sound. The Queen stood up. Like Audrey, she analyzed Solana's features and attributes. She grabbed her chin and lifted it up, looking her in the eyes. Solana made sure to hold the most gentle yet submissive eye contact she could muster up.

"My darling, you exhibit the epitome of grace and etherealness. We have our Diamond." she grabbed Solana's hand and announced proudly. Solana finally breathed out the air she was holding in. The cheers that filled the room were enough to cause temporary deafness to the regular ear. Her family looked so proud.

The estate was hectic. Everyone seemed to be excited for Solana's success regarding the Queen. Tonight, the debutantes were to go to a ball held by Sir Jackson Wang. This was Solana's opportunity to get out there and land herself a husband of high esteem.

Aymee was taking care of her as usual. Tonight's dress was something special. It was a periwinkle blue gown with white lace detailing. In the lace were shapes of hearts and swirls. The hem of her dress ombre'd with lace, being heavier and more detailed at the bottom and eventually dispersing as it goes up the dress. Her gloves were white and lacy and her go to pearl jewelry adorned her collarbones and hung off her earlobes.

The important part was her hair. Solana had long, thick jet black hair that reached down to her butt. Aymee made sure to accentuate this by giving her a half up half down with face framing curls to bring attention to her huge brown doe eyes. Sparkles were applied to her under eyes to make her even more alluring than she already was.

"I do believe you are all set, miss. I wish you the best of luck tonight. I just know that tomorrow there will be hundreds of men at the door waiting for your brothers permission to court you." There Aymee went again with the compliments and the confidence boosts. Solana gave Aymee a smile and walked into the carriage waiting outside with her family. She would finally debut into society.

The carriage ride was not long at all. They were at the ball before they could even count to three. It was loud from the outside. It was obvious that Sir Wang spared no expense when going all out. The music was beautiful and sure to get anybody in the mood to dance around the ballroom. Excited, Solana walked in a little before her siblings and stood in awe at the sheer amount of eligible bachelors. Lady Danbury walked and stood next to her at the edge of the dancefloor.

"Men should come to you soon. You are already being stared at. Let me give you some pointers. Do you see that young man over there?" she pointed over to a tall man who was drinking with another man. Their conversation must have been hilarious because he was laughing loudly and proudly showing off his deep dimples.

"That right there, is Viscount Soobin Choi. He has yet to find himself a wife though many young ladies have been after him for the past five seasons. Very stubborn, but very rich. He is sure to provide you with a good lifestyle and is known for being very kindhearted. And that man next to him," she motioned to the slightly shorter yet alluring man next to Soobin, "is Earl Yeonjun Choi of Somerset. He is twenty and four and has been desperate to find himself a companion. I think it is a lost cause. He has been extremely picky. I personally do not believe he will ever find anyone if he continues with these antics. He is also known for his rakish activities. Maybe one day he will be ready to settle down and you may just be the one. Over there on the dancefloor, dancing with Miss Audrey is Duke Taehyun Kang of Peacehaven. He seems to be doing well for himself. If you take interest in him do not be afraid to snatch him away from her; he is a good man. But there, at the table eating sweets, is Duke Kai Kamal Huening of Highworth. The poor thing. His family has been pushing him to marry for years now. He is all but twenty and one yet he is still meant to be the man of the house. He has always been too shy to approach any girl so he lurks in the corners of the ballrooms. I do not understand why he still bothers if he will not change his behavior." Suddenly, Lady Danbury's eyes shot over to a man surrounded by a group of women. "If you should be caring to impress anybody, it should be him. That there is Prince Beomgyu of South Korea. You want to be a princess don't you? You have quite the competition. I would say let him come to you, but do not be afraid to give yourself a push in his direction. He is here for a wife after all. After this season, he is to return to Korea and find one there if he fails to find one here." Solana was extremely overwhelmed by the amount of men being shown to her. She was not given a moment to recollect her thoughts before she saw people moving towards her, specifically the dimpled charmer from before. He made sure to move everybody out of his way and get a good look at her.

"Good evening miss..." he asked, grabbing Solana's hand and planting a kiss on it.

"Solana. Solana Rios de Artemisa," she replied shyly.

"Ah yes, the Diamond of the Season from the island of Cuba. I hope to make your acquaintance. May I have this dance?" he asked and smiled at her. How could Solana say no? His dimples were too charming to reject. She smiled and nodded, and he took her out to the dance floor. Everyone knew she was the Diamond. She was being stared at as she danced. But there was one stare that she could not shake off no matter how many times she spun around.

Duke Kai could not help but stare at her continuously while munching on a tart. His mother was urging him to marry and start a family. With his older sister on academic travels in Asia and his younger sister debuting this year and also finding a husband, he was well behind in his endeavors. That is when his sister, Lady Bahiyyih Huening, came up to him.

"You're looking at the Diamond are you not? I believe you saw her at the ceremony as well when I was presented. Nice young lady, my age. Brother I do hope you take this opportunity to finally get yourself a wife. Mother needs heirs, Kai. Stop being so shy and ask her to dance after this song." she commented. Kai sighed and looked at her in annoyance.

"How do you think I will approach her in any way? Do you not see the men on the sidelines waiting to have a chance with her? I cannot compete." he replied. Bahiyyih rolled her eyes.

"You say this every season, and every season you end up unmarried. If you want, I could give you a push. But you must stop standing from afar. You look like a creep." she smiled and walked away.

The song had ended and Soobin and Solana bowed towards each other to say their goodbyes.

"I shall see you tomorrow, yes? Save me a spot so I am first in line to give you my gifts," Soobin smiled and kissed her hand as a goodbye. Solana was left astounded. She did not think it was going to be as direct as that. Soon enough the second song began playing, and if Soobin was direct, Yeonjun was worse. Instantly he grabbed her hand and kissed it.

"Allow me this dance yes?" he asked and began dancing with her, not giving her a second to spare. Earl Yeonjun was much more talkative than Soobin.

"I hope you were not considering giving him a chance at courting you, my darling. Why him when I have the ability to make you much much happier, hmm?" he asked and spun her around. Solana was left speechless. Yeonjun chuckled at her shocked look and carried on dancing.

Kai did not understand why, but seeing the known rake of the community dancing with Solana annoyed him. It was not fair that someone like him had such easy access to her, compared to Kai, who found himself too shy to even approach her. He felt so useless, so pathetic for not being able to simply ask a girl to dance. Season after season he let his own anxiety prevent him from finding a worthy spouse. The song ended as well, and Yeonjun said his goodbyes to Solana.

At this point she grew tired of dancing, so she walked over to the sweets table, right where Duke Kai was standing. He felt himself begin to sweat, when Bahiyyih scurried over to the area and greeted Solana with a curtsy.

"Good evening Miss Solana. I am Bahiyyih Huening of Highworth. This here is my brother, Duke Kai Huening of Highworth. You may have seen him when the Diamond was being chosen. Congratulations, by the way. I am sure this is a huge feat in your life. I am pleased to make your acquaintance, and hopefully to befriend you, as I see we have a lot in common." she introduced enthusiastically. Bahiyyih seemed to be more than willing to become friends with Solana, while Kai seemed extremely nervous regarding her presence. Solana smiled and agreed.

"I know you have barely just gotten a moment to rest, but how would you like a dance with my brother here? He has been meaning to invite you but he is far too shy to initiate contact." This took Kai by surprise. His nerves were now more evident than ever.

"I think that would be lovely," Solana replied, hoping to give some confidence to the very attractive young man in front of her. He visibly gulped, bowed towards her, and took her out to dance. Bahiyyih smiled at herself. Poor thing did not know what she just got Solana into.

"So, Duke of Highworth yes?" she asked, trying hard to get a conversation out of the boy.

"Y-yes. We have a very rich family name. I would like to find a wife this season. I n-need an heir.." he trailed off. It was obvious that Kai was not the most sociable person, at least not at first. Solana nodded in agreement and continued dancing. It was an awkward dance, though he was a good dancer. The music stopped once more and he bowed his goodbyes.

Kai grabbed her hand with the courage he could muster up and kissed the back of it.

"I do hope to see y-you again sometime soon, Miss Solana. Farewell." He scurried away and allowed himself to breathe when he was far enough. Solana was made to dance a couple more times with different men who were all willing to impress and court her immediately. The rest of the night went by fast.

Lady Danbury and Santiago went up to Solana to inform her that it was time to return to the estate. If anyone seemed satisfied with Solana's ability to mingle and pique the interest of the eligible bachelors at the ball.

Walking to the carriage, Santiago felt the need to tell Solana what would inevitably happen next.

"Tomorrow, you must rise early. It is without a doubt that many men will be coming to the parlour early in the morning with gifts. They will be trying their best to impress you. I urge you to choose wisely and not to go with the first man that presents himself to you. The future of the family is in your hands."

The carriage ride home was filled with giggles and chatter from the women.

[winstonhenderson]

𝟏𝟗𝟔𝟖.

𝓝𝓸𝓽 𝓐 𝓛𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓚𝓲𝓭 𝓐𝓷𝔂𝓶𝓸𝓻𝓮

𝙎𝘼𝘾𝙍𝙄𝙁𝘼𝙈𝙀 𝙎𝙀𝙍𝙄𝙀𝙎

George’s Notes

We were in India. Another place. Far from home. Enjoying meditation. Having fun. 

This was my passion! In 1966. I brought the sitar and Julia loved it! Or John. Whatever. She used it in her “Norwegian Wood”. I always liked to talk about Ravi to them whenever I got the chance and all of them knew how much I liked Indian culture. So this getaway to our “ideological savior” seemed like a great way to relax ourselves. And for me, a great way to attract the writing pair’s attention! They always put Ringo and me down, even when they don’t necessarily mean it.

But the most important thing to me is that we all cleared our heads. Ritch left first. I felt sad, he and I hang out a lot, so the fact of him leaving first hit hard. Also, I understood why he did, he had bad allergies and the food here was upsetting for him. 

The two that were left gave me a hard time, each in their own way. They talked to each other from time to time. Haven’t seen them talk normally for a while. Paul would be prissy and make stupid comments, while John was unbearlably fucking around with the idea of the religion. Paul was a bit too conservative for this so he left next. He tried out all the things this place had to offer, and I must say, maybe he explored this place the best. Linda was fine too… She is a nice gal. Like Cynthia, who I had the biggest crush on for a very long time. She fit in fine, and only seemed to care about two things; relaxing and John. John decided to stay however long I wanted to stay. Of course, we are quite similar, she was starry eyed too. Pattie and I had a lot of fun together, just hanging about and talking about the most basic stuff. It became a lot quieter since Paul left. John made some jokes but her-or his-or goddamn it, I’ve known this for six years and still can’t get it right! John’s attention was elsewhere. 

What I didn’t expect was that Cynthia and Pattie became close and started to hang out on their own leaving us two behind. This was the chance to sell to John my idea for songs. Although, John looked more spaced out than usual. Offhanded comments here and there. Something about the sun, or nature, or the feel of the wind. John got poetic fast. And now, John and I are sitting here, on the beach. “Geo, do you really believe this small guru?”, oh… This is serious. It’s not really John when it’s serious.

“Yes, why?”

“Hum.”, she took a biscuit.

“Julia, why do you say that?”

“I think he is doing some fraudulent activities. Paul found something while he was scavenging.”

“And you still trust Paul?”, oh no, she is mad. Or no… Dissapointed.

She chuckled.

“Geo, he is still my songwriting partner. And here you are.”

She handed me the paper. It had a complete description of some customers' orders and the amount they charge. There was the order and then a tipping mechanism where they took 50% from people.

“I felt like Maharishi was a good little guru. Always setting up people. Making you bite.”, what the fuck are you saying Lennon!

“Me? We all bit it!”

“You bit it first.”

“Lord, Jules… Could be fake for all I know, or could be I dunno repurposed.”

“George. I’m not exaggerating aaaaand I’m not letting you spend any more money on this SCUM.”

“I know how to handle money! Sometimes better than you! Always better than John!”

“You don’t involve John in this! This is about you!”, Julia.

“Jules, I am not that fifteen year old anymore! I’m twenty five! I can make the right decisions on my own!”

Julia was distraught. But I told her the truth!

“Look, I know you are responsible, sometimes even more responsible than I am, but you are naive! You think everything can be resolved-”

“OF COURSE IT CAN! Julia, you could’ve made it known at any moment that you are a woman and it wouldn’t matter! We are on the toppermost of the poppermost Jules! You wanted to be there, remember!”, think woman, think!

Julia got angry, but not Julia angry but John angry, which was much scarier.

“We are there because people presume we are all men! And you never know what problems would arise should I do that! What if I put myself in danger? No, you in danger! I still don’t know why we’re on top. I know people dislike some of our music and want to see us fail! Half of the time I think our music is pure shite that won’t last a fucking day after if we hadn’t had such good marketing!”

“You must really hate yourself, Julia, if this trip couldn’t get you out of your mindset.”

“Georgie. Was it ever a secret?”, Jules laughed.

That woman drives me insane. I… This whole trip, the reason John was spaced out was because Julia was monitoring what I do! Lord, John or Jules always kept tabs on me! And I wonder how sometimes I could be lucky that Brian didn’t find out something or that Paul didn’t shout at me. Julia had my back! 

“Jules! You should let me fight for myself! Goddamn it! Fuck you! I… Can’t stand you sometimes. I can’t stand that you…”

Push me and want me to write more, sing more, play more? Then as John put me down and snuff out my confidence.

“I cannot let you fuck yourself up because of some unimprotant man and his cult! I can’t let anyone scream at you because of something stupid that happened. George, I do that for Ritch also, though Ritch doesn’t get into sticky situations that much.”

“Stop helping me in the worst possible way. I have to face the consequences! I have to see it for myself.”

“But what if you never figure it out?”, Julia hugged me, “What if you continue believing in your delusion and it costs you everything?”

“JULIA, that is the thing I’M TRYING TO TELL YOU!”, I hugged her.

“What?”

“You have to stop! Paul gave up on you. He married Linda, because he couldn’t marry you! You destroy yourself with drugs. You drift away more often.”

She was speechless.

“You hurt Cynthia, Ritch and I as John because of the stress and misuse of drugs! You are not yourself anymore.”

“You can’t say that you don’t use drugs too…”

“I don’t use them as much as you do. Our mommy’s death broke us. It broke you two the most.”

“Shut up, George.”

And here is John.

“John is becoming his own thing and I don’t think you can even see when you are the one or the-”

“JOHN ISN’T A REAL PERSON!”, he covered his mouth.

“He isn’t a person, he is just a device, an idea!”, he flailed his hands around.

“I can do everything and I don’t need your stupid advice. I came here to tell you and try to get you out of this cult, not to be lectured by some pussy.”

I sighed.

“George, I am going. Enjoy the view. I cannot anymore. I don’t even see properly without me glasses, so what did I even see in this place? Don’t think I didn’t get hopeful when I got here! I did. I was hopeful I would relax. I didn’t. I was scared half of the time someone would fuck up and with any interaction with Paul and other half of the time I was questioning this place. I am restless, and suppose I will be, for the rest of my life.”

“John, I told you what I meant. I am direct. Unlike you, just like Julia. I cannot watch you suffer any longer! I can’t watch people around me suffer! Just think about it! Just think!”

“I feel. I have to feel it’s right.”, John looked at me with teary eyes. Never seen Julia cry as John.

“Alright… I didn’t want to make you cry… Now it looks weird because you are still in that John getup of yours.”

Julia laughed.

“Getup, haha! Geo, you are getting more creative by the day.”

Julia lit up.

“Okay, if you want me to relax so much, I have an idea, juuuust look away for a… Couple of minutes.”

“Oh no, I have encouraged Julia Victoria Lennon to do something.”

She smiled and I turned away. I heard the sound of clothes moving around. Then bandages being taken down. Maybe even a hair tie being let down.

“Turn around!”

Oh, now it’s just Julia.

“Ta-da! Now I can relax.”, she spread herself on the sand.

“Wait- Don’t relax too much! I want to tell you about my songs!”

“Alright, Geo, what do you have in mind?”

I told her every minute detail about the songs I wrote. She listened to me! Yay! And she even approved some! And gave me some tips and tricks to work on my songs. It was really such a nice session of writing. I missed when she would give me some song attention instead of treating me like a little kid who can barely write and play.

“That’s great, I’m so proud of you!”, Julia scratched my head, “Baby George!”

“Augh, I thought you said you’ll stop calling me that!”

“Well, John said that, I didn’t.”

“You can’t get away with this!”

She calmed down.

“But seriously, continue working on this, it will sound better and better. Maybe I could get Paul to approve it-”

“No, I’ll show it to him just like I’ve shown you! Don’t do anything Lennon, I beg of ya!”

“I won’t then.”, she wistfully smiled.

You could sense the feeling of satisfaction coming from her.

“Maybe you aren’t so fragile and small like you were Georgie. But enough about that, I’m going for a swim!”

“Not without me!”

We jumped into the ocean and played around. Julia loved to swim, she was fast on foot, and she was a fast swimmer. She swam almost half a kilometer away in just 12 minutes. How does she do that with our clunky clothes? I followed her but I didn't like the chance of getting an ache and I went back to the shore. I was happy for her. This is the first time she looked naturally relaxed during this entire trip! She swam back after 20 minutes.

“I wonder how you can swim so far and not get scared? Or any aches?”

“I got aches. I just ignore them and paddle my way back, simple as that!”

“You are so weird sometimes!”, I chuckled, “And capable!”

“Um, that’s my job as your leader, dummy!”, she knocked my head.

I laughed.

“I wish I could relax like this everyday!”

“Well, that isn’t happening. But, I have a mystery to debunk, and that is Maharishi’s history. I’ll have fun.”

“You are still on about what Paul said? How about you stop thinking about him and just think about hm…”

“No, I’m doing more as a fuck you to cultists then because of Paul. I’m angry at Paul. I’m miserable because of him.”

“Glad you understand basic human emotions.”

She giggled.

“Okay, Harrison. Tell ya if I find more evidence, but knowing these kinds of trickster buggers, you won't be waiting much!”

The sun was setting and we were gazing at the view. Until I heard some movement in the trees.

“Where did we end up? Are you sure both of them are here! Oh, look, there is George!”, Pattie! Darling!

“Come here! Missed you so much!”, I hugged her.

“Where’s John?”, Cynthia wondered. 

Oh my Lord, where is Julia?

“Um, I dunno, he was just here with me.”

I searched with my eyes and found Julia hiding behind a rock all panic ridden.

“Why are there bandages on the floor?”, Pattie asked.

Cynthia realized what had happened.

“Just some trash we encountered, how awfully dirty the tourists here must be!”

“I’ll then find a rubbish bin suitable for them.”, Cynthia, thank you for taking care of John. I’m glad Julia chose to be with you and pretend than anyone else.

Julia looked at me. Her look was basically telling me: “What do we do? Should I go out or not? No, tell them to leave! Give Cynthia a sign to make them leave. I don’t want anyone else finding out.”

I scoffed.

“Where did you scoff at.”, Pattie said, “At that rock!”

Julia came out with her hands crossed.

Cyn was shocked but relieved to see her. She was waiting for what Julia would do.

“OH, it’s John, see Cyn we found him! Though I must say you look more frail than usual.”

“What can I say? This sun eats ya!”

We chuckled.

“And I had to see what Cyn’s relief looked like. Never expected such a big reaction from ya.”

“How can I not react that way when I love you so much!”, she ran towards Julia and hugged her as hard as possible, “I was already thinking I had to call the search party to search all over!”

“Don’t worry Cyn, I can handle a little labyrinth!”

“I don’t think so!”

“Alriiight.”, Julia sighed, smiling.

“Glad we are all here then! Let’s all go back together to our houses!”, Pattie was happy.

“Nah, I’d like to stay here a bit longer with Cyn.”, Julia disappointed me yet again.

“Oh- Oh, well have fun!”, Pattie waved them goodbye and I took her hand.

I sent another look to Julia. It meant “When are you going to stop lying!”

I figured Cyn helped Julia get bandaged up, because it was going to be dinner time soon. The rest of the day went normally. And the rest of the vacation was great, though it was cut short because of John’s investigation! He found out that Maharishi is a fraud, and really a fraud! So I dug deeper, and found the same, with more evidence! We united the evidence and presented it to the man, who said we were exaggerating and not understanding what it said!

“Look, you can’t deny your eyes and there are two of us claiming this against you! You lied to me!”, I began, “You lied to me that money wasn’t that important!”

“Well, I didn’t say that it was not necessary, you got to make a living!”

“By scamming others, not such a little good guru afterall! With this kind of behavior, I would’ve thought you would also pay flying carpet lessons!”

Maharishi chuckled.

“You know, this proves you’ll be absolutely the same as before if you leave. You, Lennon, have something to hide. Always look like that. You think you are clever, but you are not. You are empty, surrounded by enlightening remarks. But what is their purpose, you don’t know. For you, George Harrison, you will still be that insecure and childish egoist I met. Direct and naive; curious too. No wonder you dragged the whole group of you to-”

John was angry.

“You are not going to talk that way about us UNLESS I say what I think about you first! You are a snide, privacy breaking, yellow bellied, ass licking, greedy son of a bitch who likes to think he is so high and mighty! So it is just right to take away people’s hard earned cash like that!”

“The Beatles are basically the same thing!”

“We make good music.”, John replied.

“And we make good points? Explain the difference, Lennon, explain it! Oh, and haven’t seen this much emotion from you during your whole stay, I’m glad-”

“Because I didn’t get mad!”

“I’ll answer instead. We follow the regulations. We are not some other outside organization. We aren’t money grubbing. Maybe our producers are. And I know we will fix that when we find some inconsistencies.”, I jumped in to help.

“Maybe we are materialistic, but we aren’t putting other people in DEBT you whore! I checked multiple times.”, John continued.

“To check isn’t in character for John Lennon.”, Maharishi chuckled.

“It is if I think so. I don’t con people.”, John answered feeling confused on why Maharishi would say that. Then the guru scammer smiled.

“I’ll figure you out, Lennon. You have something to hide.”

John chuckled, “To hide is to survive? Isn’t that the principle of not getting caught in your scam?”

Maharishi got serious.

“You are feeling guilty of your scamming and blaming others, meanwhile I don’t have anything to declare.”, John stated with confidence.

“I know a deviant when I see them.”

“Oh, and now it’s John’s fault I have turned against you, isn’t it!”, I figured it out, “Trying to blame him for my complaint!”

Maharishi looked at me with some kind of disgust.

“Of course. Of course, we are leaving now. This instant.”, I got mad.

“Don’t go mad Georgie, this mister right here can use it against ya. You have to be relaxed and fulfilled, like he said. That’s how you get happiness, right?”, John joked.

I chuckled and calmed down.

“Yer right.”

“Well, mister, we loved the island and all, but you're a fraud and we have to go!”, John waved him goodbye and I followed. Maharishi pulled me back.

“Mr. Harrison, don’t listen to him!”, he told me, “He is a deviant, a snake, presenting himself as he isn’t!”

“And why would I not? He is one the lads! And you are the snake here.”

“No, no, that’s not a “lad” as you say, not a traditional lad, that’s a hijra.”

“A what now?”

“A… neither male nor female.”

I looked at him blankly. So he figured out the twin tale?

“You cannot trust someone who doesn’t know what they are. And this person, this “John Lennon” as they call itself, is absolutely not trustworthy. Always joking around, always monitoring you, always making inappropriate and underhanded comments. You want freedom and expression right?”

Lord, this slimy motherfucker.

“John is still one of my best friends and pals. You can’t make me stay here any longer. You just made me more angry and volatile. And you accuse John of such heinous acts with no evidence to support it.”

I began walking away towards John, who was packing with Cynthia and Pattie.

“Oh, I understand now. You know of Lennon’s decadency even before I even tell you! Both of you are flawed, go then! I don’t need a place for rude and deviant people like you!”

“Oh, where’s the “we welcome everyone to our family!” or “we are happy to accept any LOST soul”.”, John argued.

Maharishi smiled and walked up to John. He said something to him that made him shiver. Still John behaved cocky and said,

“Oh, I promise I’ll do that. For the chance to piss you off, I’ll continue doing that for as long as I want to!”

We boarded the boat. I looked at John perplexed. 

“What happened for us to go earlier?”, Pattie wondered.

“John, what did you do?”, Cyn asked.

“Absolutely nothing that deserved that kind of send off! Accusing me of deviancy just because George and I handed in some damning evidence that Maharishi scams people!”

“That’s… Fun.”, Cynthia sighed, “Well, at least we’re in one piece and haven’t been held up by that con artist in any other way.”

“You are so smart, Cyn.”, John chuckled, “Yer right as ever.”

John proceeded to kiss her. Before that he gave her a small, not really noticeable sign. He always warned Cyn before kissing her. But I never really noticed Cyn tensing up before the act.

I kissed Pattie as well and whispered in her ear:

“I’m glad this hellish discussion is over and you have absolutely nothing to do with it!”

“I’m glad you’re okay, George.”

Pattie looked at Cynthia and John, “Let’s go inside, it’s getting a bit chilly in here.”

“Wait for us two inside then, I have to talk to John about this shit in private.”

The wives giggled.

“Alright then, George, we’ll be inside. If you need any advice or a shoulder to cry on, you know where to find us!”

“Pattie, sometimes you could be so funny!”, my sweet Pattie.

“And not always? The insolence of this young man! We are going inside, pronto!”, Cynthia pulled Pattie with her.

John rolled his eyes while chuckling.

“No wonder Cyn is my best female friend.”

“Well, a wife is a best friend too.”, I joked.

There was a small pause. We looked at the ocean and the waves splashing in the sun. 

“John, what did that son of a bitch tell you?”

“There is something called a hijra in Indian or Southeastern culture. It is a person in drag, a person who identifies as the opposite gender… He told me that he figured out I was in drag. He told me I can’t keep it together and remain normal if I ever was. He told me I corrupted you… He told me I will drag the entire band into ruin. And even if I told everyone the truth that I would make everything the Beatles did worthless and meaningless.”

“What a freak!”, I couldn’t believe it. Maharishi was today very awful towards us, especially towards John. Was he always a bit more awful to women? Now that I think about it, he didn’t talk that much with our wives. He focused on us four. What a scammer.

“I know that, but it does send shivers down my spine, y’know.”

“I’m just happy we had fun and we’re going home, Jules.”, ahh, fuck this man.

“Yeah, I’m happy too. Let’s go inside, Geo.”

“Yeah. Thanks for looking out for me… But please don’t do it as much anymore, Julia.”

“I’ll try not to. And… Perhaps, baby George is right about some things.”

I think some things are going to change in the Beatles and I hope for the better. The most important thing is that I have proven that I’m not a child anymore - I’m an adult who speaks his mind and deserves to be listened to. Perhaps, they will put more songs on the next album… Can’t wait to work with Ritch again…

Rest of Sacrifame