#i also wanna practice some characters i don’t Draw often so

[vocochair]

Give me any sonic ships to Draw, yes your favorite most underground ships can finaly be visualized! Rarepairs poly or popular ships give me them ALL.(exept obviously problematic ships and ve€pio.)

[cupcakeslushie]

I have a question and you might’ve been asked before, but animation, do you have any tips for beginners? Love your content btw 🥰

Even tho my degree is in animation I must be honest…😬 nowadays I very often don’t have the patience for anything more complicated than animatics. So I’m trying to stick to tried and true advice lol…

Probably the biggest tip would be that, yes the beginner exercises may be boring, and not look very cool, but they are essential to getting those skills you need down. The flour sack exercise, the wave principle—doing squash and stretch, and timing studies to really nail the way that movements should “flow” properly. These are absolutely necessary skills to master if you want to make fluid animations.

Planning is also another important, but sometimes overlooked aspect of animation. Some ppl (read:me) wanna just jump straight to animating. But planning in those first simplest stages really helps save you headaches in the later stages, when things are getting more complicated and all over the place. Storyboarding helps you plot your timing, choosing where key shots will go, camera angles, pacing ect.

And speaking of camera angles. STUDY STUDY STUDY cinematography! Something doesn’t have to be animated for it to be applied to animation. Perspective is a massive beast to tackle once you start storyboarding and unless you want boring shots and stagnant compositional framing, you need to learn all the ways you can frame a scene and your characters! Idk if you’re up for watching some horror movies, but those are a great source to pull from, as they tend to always frame, pace and even light their shots in really interesting and dynamic ways!

It’s also great to practice with free programs before you spend money on things like a subscription for photoshop or any other fancy software. Most interfaces are similar enough, that beginning with something free like Rough Animator or Blender can give you some good practice before you commit!

That’s all I can think of right now! And sorry if that wasn’t exactly what you were looking for…if you want me to try to give more specific advice on something just drop me another ask—I’m willing to keep rambling on!

Lastly, just few good videos I have saved!

Good traditional habits for digital animators <- basically Toniko Pantoja’s whole channel is a goldmine of knowledge!

Drawing figures in perspective

Every Frame A Painting is also a great channel for breaking down film/composition/writing—there’s a video for virtually every aspect of cinema

-Chuck Jones -the evolution of an artist

-Akira Kurosawa- composing movement

-Satoshi Kon- editing space and time

[maxdibert]

Now I also wanna complain and I wanna complain about the often mischaracterization of Sirius. In mostly R/S fics they practically make Remus the big bad alpha and Sirius a whiny, feminine man-child. And like…when did they come to the conclusion that a man who did bad things in his life, went to twelve years of prison and was constantly in presence of literal joy-sucking demons, was a small little baby? That twink wouldn’t survive a day in Azkaban lol

And I agree on Sirius/James, they probably fit the stereotype of those two classmates everyone had, that said they weren’t gay but were always all over eachother and togheter everywhere

Sirius Black is described by Rowling almost obsessively as someone extremely handsome, extremely tall, and very masculine. Just as Rowling insists on drilling into the reader's head that Severus is physically hideous, she’s equally insistent that Sirius is essentially a magazine model. Literally, these two characters are the ones she describes the most, and she doubles down the hardest on their physical appearances. But Rowling doesn’t stop there: she shows us that girls swooned over Sirius, paints him as the stereotypical teenager with semi-naked women on posters in his bedroom, and tells us from the very first book that he rode a motorcycle.

I know that none of these things necessarily mean anything from a modern perspective, where gender fluidity is understood and breaking stereotypes is valued. But we’re not talking about a modern author with a modern perspective. We’re talking about J.K. Rowling—someone obsessed with rigid gender binaries, a textbook TERF, and an author who repeatedly condemns traditional femininity above all else. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that when she tells us Sirius had bikini-clad women on his walls and rode a motorcycle, she’s trying to make us imagine him as a manly man. And, in fact, she assigns him traits typically associated with masculinity: being impulsive, sometimes violent, and exuding a rebellious bad-boy attitude.

Rowling was projecting the archetypal high school bad boy, and the stereotypical bad boy isn’t some skinny, short guy trying to challenge masculine hegemony—he’s the opposite. What frustrates me the most about how this image has been corrupted isn’t just that it completely ruins his character—whose personality and psyche are deeply tied to the toxic hypermasculinity Rowling created him with—but also that it robs us of the chance to acknowledge that a guy can fully embody the cis male archetype and still be gay.

The problem isn’t that he’s paired with men; it’s that in order to pair him with men, people feel the need to create an entirely new character that bears no resemblance to him. Because that’s not Sirius Black. In the same way, the “alpha male of the pack” isn’t Remus Lupin. Canonically, Remus Lupin was the third tallest after James, a guy who hid behind his friends, who didn’t want to draw attention to himself, and who was so afraid of being left out that he wouldn’t even stand up to them when they did something he didn’t like. He’s not a self-assured person; he has zero self-esteem, is deeply conflict-avoidant, and hates confrontation.

I don’t understand the need to change the characters. Wolfstar has been around as long as the fandom itself, and 15 years ago, Remus was still Remus, and Sirius was still Sirius. I don’t understand this current trend of completely dismantling their characters.

[cozymochi]

Okay gen question, how are you so good at anatomy? like I know its a mix of years of practice and experience. Mayhaps you can spare some tips on how ppl can improve theirs? Always looking forward to your works btw! Even the scribbles you think aren't decent are always such a nice treat to see <3

It being drilled into my system years ago in a drawing class specifically for that 😭 Then a character design class the next semester that added on top of it. BUT FOR CARTOONSSSSS (I have not accomplished anything in my life to utilize any of this.)

My main point of knowledge reference is this book though (OMG FREE INTERNET ARCHIVE PDF? Yes. Though I personally have a physical copy.) We didn’t really read the walls of text so much as just practiced the proportion stuff in the early pages ad-nauseam and some skeletons (not hyper detailed ones just making sure bones were where they should be). Tho admittedly I’ve been neglecting any studying. (This book came out in 1943 brrgh) DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I HAD TO DRAW THIS DIAGRAM? MORE THAN ANY PERSON SHOULD.

But hey, it works. I still sometimes end up referring back to it if I think I’m sucking (disclaimer: i think this often )

As far as I’ve come to know, how something looks visually doesn’t matter so much long as basic proportions are correct. Cuz even people without trained eyes for this sorta thing can recognize when something is proportionately wrong. Like, I guess on you know where everything is supposed to go, you can kinda do anything from there?? I think. It translated well when we were drawing real people who were not the “ideal” presented, and when moving to more stylized stuff with their own rules in a completely different course. So what if that leg doesnt look exactly like u think a leg looks anatomically— IS THE KNEE IN THE CORRECT SPOT? Yes? Then u did it.

Also that eyes are in the center of the face. Not the nose. JUMPSCARE!!!

Aaaa, this isn’t really an interesting answer. If I ever figured out better streaming outside if private discords I could probably make my points better rather than pulling a “here’s a textbook, figure it out” CUZ ITS LIKE. ITS OVERWHELMING WITHOUT A GUIDE AND 😭😭😭

I don’t know. I don’t think I have “anatomy” correct, just “proportions.” Cuz I wouldn’t be able to tell you what something is, just where something goes. Which… I think is a little more important and also a distinction I don’t really see anyone making in drawing.

Though, as much as I wanna be helpful in a more effective way, it’s really really really hard for me to articulate how anyone could improve theirs if I don’t know what the alleged problem areas are 😭 I find all this stuff to be case by case. I kind of do better if i can directly point things out and offer info from there instead of blank slate tips. If I ever figure out streaming outside of private discords it would probably be easier (literally doesnt own a functional up to date enough computer)

I guess focus less on “anatomy” and focus more on proportions since that does more of the heavy lifting? Unless ur a med student, then you probably should focus on anatomy

someone could die because you couldnt identify their coccyx

OKAY THATS IT THANKS AND SORRY

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

so i’ve been drawing ulster cycle/tain bo cuailnge characters for a while now and a problem that i have repeatedly run into is that i have no idea how these people dress. their clothes always end up looking wrong and i don’t know where to look to find good info about it or references to work from, and it can be difficult to differentiate the more faithful depictions from the stereotypical “ancient celtic warrior” stuff, especially since i’m not well versed in most of the texts they’re based on. do you have any advice/resources/tips/anything to help? thanks :)

i am not particularly an expert on historic clothing and i have to admit it's not an area i have a great deal of knowledge about in the context of the ulster cycle specifically but here are some thoughts!

a good starting point would be the descriptions of clothes within the texts themselves. so you can just go to the online edition of o'rahilly's translations (recension 1 / book of leinster) and search a word like "cloak" or "tunic" and get all the descriptions of cloaks and tunics that show up in the story itself. e.g:

this is a good starting point bc what you'll be representing is at least clothing as it's presented in these stories even if it doesn't necessarily 100% represent historical fact, because it's often stylised, idealised, uses colours for symbolic value rather than practicalities of dyeing etc

(here's a link to the index of translated texts on this part of the CELT site if you wanna have a browse for others)

but that can be tricky without visual references which is where you start needing other sources

and that's where it's worth noting that the ulster cycle texts are set a long time before they're written, but the material culture in the stories is generally neither a historically accurate representation of the distant past, or a totally contemporary and up-to-date depiction of what people were wearing at the time (bc there's a degree of archaising and trying to make stuff sound old and also drawing on earlier sources). so you end up with multiple options for what period you might be trying to represent -- ~1st cent BCE when they're set? ~8th cent when our earliest surviving stories show up? ~11th-12th cent when TBC was written in its surviving form?

the good news is that you can probably learn a lot from reenactors and experimental archaeologists and living history types -- from vikings in ireland through to normans in ireland is pretty well covered in that regard, but there's some earlier bronze-iron age stuff as well, and that should give you some visual references to draw on. i'm sure some more reenactment and living history minded followers of mine will have specific recs for resources there, but you could try looking at the UCD experimental arch folks, craggaunowen living history centre in the west of ireland (they have a video on weaving and clothing), the dublinia museum for viking-age stuff, etc

and the big advantage of the texts not being "historically accurate" themselves is that you don't have to stick too closely to a specific century or whatever if you don't want to! not that the basic design of a tunic would change a huge amount but if you wanna mix and match the vibes somewhat, nobody could really call you out on it

the HARDEST part is probably representing armour, which shows up fairly rarely, but you've got things like cu chulainn's 27 'waxed shirts' and i've seen various theories about what that's supposed to entail but i don't think there's a definite answer. having said that, most of the time he's not wearing that so you can just... ignore it, if you want to and don't want to conform to any specific theory about it lol

finally you can't go wrong with tunics. just layers of tunics. long tunics under short tunics. tunics with cloaks. fancy tunics. simple tunics. people loved a tunic

[snicker-dooodless]

*GRABS YOU BY THE FACE*

ASH-

RAMBLE ABOUT YOUR BILLY KID SELF SHIP THIS INSTANT

(i may not know who this billy kid character is but anything to support a friend :3) also bc i wanna fangirl over them bc THEY JUST LOOK SOOO ADORABLEEE💖💖💖

EVE IM IN PUBLIC AND YOUR GONNA MAKE ME GIGGLE STOP IT! Anyway, I’m just gonna give yall some fun facts since I know that if i don’t I won’t be able to hold back and I won’t be able to stop rambling about them lol

-their ship name was actually gonna be GameKnight (since my sona works at an arcade and billy is obsessed with a show called starlight knights.) because i think for dates they would have game NIGHTS…get it?

-My sona owns an apartment so I’m pretty sure that when they get more serious Billy would move in since I’m like- 99% sure he’s living with one of his friends currently (Nicole I’m pretty sure)

-Eve, I know you. So I know you’ll understand when I say that these two are practically just Leo and Tomiko

-so- ya know the Starlight Knights? That show Billy loves? I like to think Ash only watched clips of it before meeting him for the animation. So when they get together and watch it together, they both focus on parts of the show they usually wouldn’t. Ash finally focuses on the story and characters instead of just the animation, and Billy finally realizes how much story telling is shown visually through the art and animation

-Since Billy is a robot he doesn’t get sick, so whenever Ash does he thinks she’s dying or something

-Ever since they met at the arcade ash works at Billy comes by way more often. Saying that he was earning and saving up his tickets for a prize when in reality he isn’t even playing any games, just talking to Ash

-Ash would make him fanart of Starlight Knights, as well as draw his sona lol

-they would wear couple costumes for Halloween, either something cute like starlight night characters or something stupid like Sans and the queen of England

-Billy would have pet names for her like ‘Starlight (starlight knights ref) princess, Ashyyyyyyyyy (he always draws out the Y too) beautiful or handsome’

-Ash would have pet names for him like ‘my knight (starlight knights ref) pretty boy, handsome’

-They both have mutual ones too like ‘Pookie, babe, baby, baby girl, boo boo bear, Shnookums’ they have cheesy ones to annoy each other and to gross people out in public

-Ash would send Billy these pics randomly

-Whenever Billy would feel sad that he doesn’t have a mouth so he can’t kiss her, Ash would just say that “since you don’t have lips, that doesn’t limit me to where I have to kiss you” if that makes sense lol? So she just peppers kisses everywhere on his face

-also speaking of him not having a mouth, Ash would draw mouths on sticky notes, either kissy 030 ones or cat :3 ones

-pictures that remind me of them

If you have any specific questions feel free to ask!!!

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 14: DREAM CATCHER - Episode 14: Travel Tales

Izumi: We’re home.

Sakuya: Welcome home!

Kazunari: *yawn*~ We’re back.

Chikage: You seem sleepy.

Citron: Must be wet lag~

Kazunari: Jet lag~ I did sleep a bit on the plane, tho.

Misumi: We brought lots of souvenirs~

Banri: You even gathered triangle goods from the US?

Misumi: Yup! A triangle flag, a triangle chocolate bar, a triangle cookie, a triangle hat and a triangle mirror.

Misumi: And also a triangle bag and a triangle keyholder…

Itaru: Status ailment: Gestaltzerfall…

Yuki: I bought cosmetics for Azu-nee and Azami. These items are limited to American stores, apparently. I also found the things you asked for.

Azami: Thanks. That's the stuff I wanted. They're expensive here, even more so 'cause they're imported.

Azuma: Thank you. I’ll use it carefully.

Muku: Ju-chan, we also bought lots of sweets, like chocolate.

Juza: Won’t have to worry about snacks for a while.

Kumon: Also, we bought that yummy ranch dressing we had. It can be used for salads, but also potatoes and pizza.

Omi: Oh, you don’t see that in Japan often. We should try it for dinner tonight.

Kazunari: Furuuche-san, we also brought alcohol. We don’t have this whiskey here in Japan yet.

Sakyo: Lookin’ forward to trying this.

Kumon: We also got pamphlets for the musical, and some limited edition merch~

Tsumugi: I want to look at the pamphlet later.

Tasuku: How was it?

Kumon: It was the best! I wish I could’ve seen even more!

Guy: Is that so? I would also like to see one again.

Homare: How does the Winter Troupe also going on an overseas training trip sound?

Tsumugi: Sounds like we’ll be going to watch some kind of play every day.

Tsuzuru: Oh, you guys are back. Great timing, I’m done with the script.

Kumon: Really!? I wanna read it!

Tenma: Hit us with it.

Tsuzuru: Eh? No, don’t you guys wanna take a break–

Kazunari: We got a bunch of inspo on our trip, and we’re super hyped and rearing to go right now!

Misumi: I wanna act as soon as possible!

Tsuzuru: R-Really? Then, I’ll hand ‘em out.

Muku: Wahhh, I can’t wait to read it!

-

Tsuzuru: While keeping everyone’s requests in mind, I tried writing it so everyone is a protagonist like in the first performance.

Tsuzuru: Also, while everyone was separated based on the original story before, they’ve now come together as one team.

Tsuzuru: I think that way we can bring out the Summer Troupe’s colors.

Kazunari: Everyone going on an adventure together sounds super fun~!

Kumon: My role is the Genie of the Ring! I’m so happy I get to be friends with everyone!

Tenma: We have to get over our jet lag before we start practicing for real.

-

[Loud erasing]

Yuki: …

Tenma: Are you drawing the rough designs?

Yuki: Yeah. I need to put results of our study trip into practice.

Tenma: Are our outfits also gonna change, like the Spring Troupe’s did?

Yuki: For RomiJuli, I had to keep in mind the passage of time and the changes in the characters’ positions as I created their outfits, but for the Summer Troupe’s sequel…

Yuki:  It’s still under consideration. I also have to talk it through with Azami.

[Phone buzzing]

Tenma: — —

Yuki: You’ll distract me if you talk on the phone, so go outside.

Tenma: Yeah, yeah.

-

Cat: Meow~

Misumi: Yup, the moon is a full circle tonight~ It’s perfect for a walk.

Tenma: No, but I can’t just–

Tenma: … I understand.

Misumi: ?

previous episode | masterpost | next episode

[ryuichirou]

Replies

More replies about recent stuff, ships, antis, etc etc, business as usual~ there are a couple (literally) of headcanons in this post too!

Anonymous asked:

I’m going to assume that the recent Lilidia comic is before they know that they’re online buddies and that Idia was the one who sent the shirt?

This one is related to a comic we posted on ko-fi today <3

And yes, Anon, you are correct! That was the idea behind the comic hehe. They were meant to meet offline for the first time this evening but they yet need some time to realise they’re looking for each other lol

Alright, now a couple of asks about the RookVil post from yesterday. I am very happy that you liked that one.

Anonymous asked:

“Distracted”…you mean by Niege?

By Vil in her beautiful dress of course  

Anonymous asked:

ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE WITH YOUR FEM ROOK AND VIL DEAR! OH THEY BRING ME SO MUCH JOY! THEY ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!~

Sorry for the caps but thank you hahaha it gave me energy

Also I was reading some of the asks and I just wanna say those Ortho/Malleus sounds so good! Shoutout to that guy and sorry for using this ask about it 🤭

Thank you so much, Anon!! <3 They bring me joy too, it always feels very self-indulgent when I draw them, especially as girls lol

Yesss this is such a good ship. Shoutout to the OruMal person! I’m glad they’re getting appreciation for their big brains…

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

Fem Vil is DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN Mummy -sorry mummy- sorry –

Fem Vil is always either mummy or just a mum… well, technically this also applies to regular Vil lol Also, technically, she (and he) is a step-mummy or a step-mum...

I’m glad you liked it! <3

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

Ortho x Malleus... Hmmm...you know I might get on that train, it's actually pretty cute the more I think about it and I'm just imagining a double date with Idia and Lilia and Ortho and Malleus, maybe even a triple date if we add Sebek and Silver

Ahhh, Ortho/Malleus and Lilia/Idia would be a very fun combo!! Sebek and Silver too… Sebek would get way too distracted by Malleus being with Ortho though, things would probably get a bit messy lol

Anonymous asked:

"Slenderman is scared to see Rook when he turns around" Rook truly is the most horrifying horror monster of all time lol.  The non-human students would survive a horror setting simply because nothing compares to being hunted by Rook.

And sorry if you already answered this, but in your Prison au how do you decide who's a guard and who's a prisoner?

(this one is related to this post)

You’re SO RIGHT ANON LOL If they survived being around Rook for 3 years, they won’t be scared of anything. This is what a little bit of Rook Hunt does to a collective. Influencing people in a good way by being an absolute creep…

And to answer your question, the roles are pretty flexible: Katsu mentioned in this reply that they could be either one (both would work for a lot of them really), but some characters just feel more suitable for one role and not the other I guess? Plus, it implies their relationship with the characters around them. So, whatever option sounds more fun and could lead to a more interesting scenario.

Anonymous asked:

I know you mentioned in a previous reply that you don’t ship Jack/Epel often, but I would still love to hear any few headcannons you might have about them. I have one where Jack goes to Vil for advice on how to approach Epel in a romantic fashion since Jack would have a secret crush on him. Meanwhile Rook is probably giving very detailed advice to Epel (who also has a secret crush on Jack) on how to “properly tame your partner” and Epel just gets super confused and embarrassed

Sorry for the late reply, Anon!

Oh god I can practically hear Vil’s “ara?” when Jack goes to him for advice… What an experience for him, considering how close he is with both Jack and Epel, to suddenly have these two show some interest in each other lol

And it makes sense that Epel would go to Rook for that, and not really because of his hunter thing, but he is absolutely going to end up listening to a lecture about taming and recognising the signs of courtship behaviour… this isn’t even remotely going the way Epel thought it would…

I still don’t have many thoughts about them, unfortunately. But here is a couple of things that come to mind as I’m thinking about these two right now…

When their club activities don’t happen at the same time, they visit each other. Sometimes just to wait until the other one is done, sometimes to cheer a little (just a little though), sometimes just to hang out. But Jack tries not to do that often because Epel gets very distracted when he is around + his senpais tease him a lot.

Epel doesn’t always like how caring and sweet Jack is, sometimes it feels to him like he is being babied by him, but he does know that Jack has a wilder side (Vil hinted on it once because he knew Epel would feel that way), so now Epel tries to poke the wolf bear (that is Jack) from time to time to see if he would react.

Anonymous asked:

Idia, probably: What in the fifty shades of moe is this?

(this one is related to this comic)

Yeah, he had no idea stuff like this could happen to him…

Anonymous asked:

Had an encounter with an anti on a different app; their argument was that shotacons are creepy and how they talk about little boys are creepy.  Good ole' Google tells me shotacon does not apply to TWST so Idk why they brought it up.  And the only little boys are Cheka and Gidel.  If they were genuinely referring to the main cast as little boys, maybe it's just me, but calling high schoolers that is weird.  I didn't handle the encounter well, but thinking back it feels like they had no clue what they were saying.  Their argument was about something completely different and had nothing to do with TWST if they even know what it is.  The logic ain't logic-ing with these folks.

Yeah, technically there are no shotas other than Cheka and Gidel in TWST, but some could also count Ortho or even Lilia (Ace commented on him looking much younger than a 16 y.o., which all those people fucking ignore, as you might’ve noticed, because they’re hypocrites) and Epel, because while they aren’t of the needed age category, they’re rather small. And with Ortho people love to talk about how he is a 5 y.o., which is a lie lol

You are right that they don’t really know what they’re talking about. They never do, because the point of the conversation isn’t to make an argument and have a proper discussion, it’s to make the opponent sound so wrong, so appalling, so sick, that they come out of this thing feeling like the only beacon of moral excellence surrounded by gross perverts with zero self-control. When in fact they’re just uneducated enjoyers of spreading moral panic + emotional vampires lol

The thing is, shota and all the other “dead dove tropes” is a niche within a niche. People in general don’t understand shipping and our way of interacting with fiction, and even fewer people understand problematic tropes. It’s okay, it’s not for everyone. But it sure is a convenient reason to attack people!

[rusty-lunatic]

I never understood introductions until now, so here mine goes, a few months late!

Salutations, I’m Luna, pleasure to be meeting everyone! Here’s a bit about me

Me? Oh, I’m very autistic. And I mean the definition of why autism and ADHD make whatever creature I am. I am asexual and aromantic, and I am he/him despite the name “Luna” which I go by!

Like I said, I’m very autistic, also ADHD, ODD, OCD, yeah yeah you get the point, all those neurological disorders and diagnoses blended together make me, a psychopath and friendly creature! (I consider myself as)

I’m 21+, my blog contains swears and references to sex (the slightest references, it’s a subject I try to talk about the least.) I welcome everyone here! Except those who are against the LGBTQ+ community, and all you white supremacy people can go fuck yourselves!

See, we welcome practically everyone here!

A bit more about me is I really like cats, I love South Park and my very favorite characters are Jimbo and Ned! I could yap about them all day. I also love Hazbin Hotel, my very favorite FAVORITEE character from Hazbin Hotel is Alastor! I could yap about anything all day! Oh and, an important thing about me is that I’m not good at wording things, you may get the wrong impression from my words!

Also, I love drawing a lot, it’s one of my favorite things in the world. I love math and science and school, I’m not really good in social but I find my way!

I really hope that I put some smiles or ideas onto people! Good ones, that is of course!

My favorite color is Navy Green, I am very much Roman Catholic- speaking of religion, I’m gonna be religious for a slight moment and say, god bless you! I try not to talk about religion, I don’t wanna upset anyone or get people against me. Also, I am in school still by choice, I do chemical engineering classes! Chemicals and science, including math just fascinate me, they always have!

I also do have PTSD, so please be gentle on certain subjects. One of the subjects I’d be okay with sharing awareness about is pit bulls, the dog breed. It may not seem a big deal, but theirs often a lot of conversation about them. I’m not gonna say much about this, but every time I’ve had an interaction with pit bulls never ended well (twice) I’m not gonna get into it much, but let’s try and avoid that topic, hmm?

Well, I also would be glad to take art requests! I’m not too talented, but I love making people art!

I’d also be glad to try and remake any art if asked, and also I don’t give or take money, don’t ask me to buy or sell stuff, for a lot of reasons! I would love to do roleplaying too if theirs certain limitations, stuff like that to keep it under control.

Also, I’m fine with political conversations, as long as they don’t get too out of hand! And they mustn’t be hate speech toward anyone, it shall stay respectful!

Well, you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading! Now you know more about me than most of my family! Have a good day, fellow Tumblr users!

Anymore questions? Ask me! I’ll answer anything I’m comfortable with gladly!

[otomehoneyybearr]

Act 12

Episode 24: The What-If Future and The Certain Now: Juza

Working w/ Maybelle Lace, jujumin-translates, Fea

Note: As you read, you will see that some sentences highlighted in a different color, this is what they indicate.

Pink: Flashback

Blue: Characters are acting

𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍

Juza: ..

Kumon: Juza... Juza..

Juza: ...

Kumon: Juza.

Juza: ...

Kumon: ...I'll come back later.

Juza: ...

Muku: ...Juchan.

Juza: ...

Muku: Sorry... I meant Juza.

Juza: ...

Juza: (...This is fine. No one can find me in the dark. They can’t find me. I’ll just keep living alone like this.)

Juza: (This way, I won't hurt anyone. I don't need any light in my life.)

Muku: ...

Juza: Muku...?

Muku: Juchan, let’s go together—

Juza: ..!

Juza: (Can I also be under that light—?)

Juza: ——Hah.

Juza: (I'm too scared to take that step...)

Staff A: Juza, can you bring this to the costume room?

Juza: Got it.

Actor A: Good job today.

Actor B: Thank you for your hard work.

Juza: Thanks.

Yuzo: Juza, you gotta sec?

Juza: Yea.

Yuzo: I feel bad for asking ya to help out when the theater company is in trouble.

Juza: We can't practice over there right now, it's actually a good distraction.

Yuzo: I guess the date for the second part of the full bloom performance will be rescheduled.

Yuzo: If it overlaps with this performance, I'll look for guest performers and behind-the-scenes help, so don’t hesitate to let me know.

Juza: 'Kay

Yuzo: In addition to that. Here.

Juza: Is this the casting sheet for the main cast

Juza: !

Juza: "Juza Hyodo (MANKAI Company)"... What does this mean?

Yuzo: It's a little sudden, but we're already gearing up for the next performance. I’m thinking of including you as a guest star in the main cast of the performance

Juza: Me?

Yuzo: Although you'll be the fifth main character, it'll be different from your previous minor roles.

Juza: But... there are many other actors in this theater company who are better than me…

Yuzo: I didn't offer it to you because you're amazing at acting.

Yuzo: After talking with the scriptwriter, we thought that you’d be perfect for this role in the performance.

Yuzo: You’re not a very versatile actor, but there's a certain charm that draws people to roles that are unique to you.

Yuzo: Besides, our guys also appreciate your dedication as an actor and your personality.

Yuzo: They’re eager to do a full-fledged play with you. It's a good opportunity.

Juza: ..!

Yuzo: Banri also takes advantage of his art school environment and often appears in on-campus performances.

Yuzo: So you might need to gain experience in a different way… But, I guess this kind of provocation is unfair, huh?

Juza: Well, I’m not gonna let him get ahead of me.

Juza: But… while I really wanna do it, right now…

Juza: I can't think about it until the issue with the theater company is sorted out.

Yuzo: Well, I thought you'd say that.

Yuzo: So, I won’t be making an official offer until you guys have safely finished the second part of the Full Bloom performance.

Yuzo: The date is scheduled more than half a year away, so it's not like I'm rushing for a reply.

Yuzo: Otherwise, your little brother’ll keep pestering me about snatching you away again

Juza: I'm really happy about the offer and the recognition from you and everyone in the theater company

Juza: Once everything's resolved at the theater company, I'd even like to audition for the role myself

Yuzo: That's the spirit. It's a blessing to have a place for yourself that you absolutely want to prioritize. Cherish it

Juza: (My own place, huh... I really do have one.)

Banri: ...

Juza: ...

Banri: ...That's a win.

Juza: Yeah, for me.

Banri: I think you mean me!

Juza: No, me.

Banri: Oh yeah?!

Juza: Yeah!

Sakyo: This is NOT the time for a fight!

Juza: Ugh.

Banri: OW!

Omi: Curtain call, you guys!

Taichi: C'mon, Banny! Juza!

Banri: Let's roll!

Juza: Yeah.

Omi: Juza, you said you didn't know what kind of actor you were, but we're all painfully aware.

Omi: I thought turning it into a film like this would make you understand.

Banri: Your strength as an actor is being a frantically hardworking idiot. What else is there?

Banri: You should just listen and stick to playing delinquents and thugs.

Banri: Even if they all look the same, you live each and every one of their unique, individual lives on the stage.

Taichi: That's right. There's a genuine coolness that you bring to life because you're you, Juza!

Sakyo: It might take time, but you'll cling on and do whatever it takes to achieve your goal; That's your muddy style, Hyodo. And that's fine.

Sakyo: Because that's how you make humans who don't exist look like they're real.

Azami: You are you. You're just not anyone else.

Juza: …

Juza: (Mankai Company came in the middle of my pitch-dark life. It was a light that suddenly appeared in front of me.)

Juza: (Muku gave me the opportunity to step out towards that light with a strong desire to change who I was.)

Juza: (Thanks to that, I am able to perform like this now.)

Juza: (It's the one and only light that I was miraculously able to grasp.)

Juza: (Even if this light fades away into the darkness, I will never let it go.)

Juza: (No matter how miserably I struggle, I'll cling on under this light.)

Juza: (For me, nothing can replace being illuminated by the spotlight on the stage of the Mankai Theater.)

Juza: (I’ve come to know the solid connection that I can feel with my friends on the stage of the Mankai Theater.)

Juza: (I’ll never return to the lonely darkness.)

Juza: (I’ve already had the answer to Izumi’s homework long before she gave it out.)

Juza: I'm back.

Kumon: Juza, Juza!!

Juza: ?

Kumon: Look here! Sakuya sent you something!

Juza: Sakuya did?

Kumon: One was sent to me too.

Juza: A postcard...

Kumon: It looks like he sent it while on his trip.

Juza: ..

Sakuya: “When I travel alone, I remember many things about the theater company.”

Sakuya: "Doing street acts with Juza, who is very good atacting, was always a lot of fun.''

Juza: (Really... You're probably better than me.

Juza: (I was always happy that you could sympathize with my strong feelings towards acting.)

Juza: (At the same time, I secretly admired you for being able to express your feelings so directly.)

Sakuya: "It's really amazing that our plays can move the hearts of the audience.'

Sakuya: "I was always happy to be able to share such honest feelings with Juza.''

Juza: (The great thing about Sakuya is that he can convey the message head-on like this.

Juza: ...I want to talk with Sakuya.

Kumon: I feel ya. I really want to gather together in the dormitory again soon.

Juza: Same here.

𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍𑁍

Prev | Next

▼・ᴥ・▼

[shxtodxroki]

Match-Up Exchange

These are some match-ups done for @jetblackw1ngs as part of a match-up exchange we agreed to! Hi hi, I finally got your match-ups all finished up! I really hope you enjoy both of these, I really appreciated both your patience through this exchange and also how kind you were :> I had a lot of fun writing this, and you’re welcome to pop back over to this blog any time if you have a request or wanna chat/be friends! Also apologies in advance for any spelling/grammar errors I missed!

For Haikyuu, I’d Match You With:

Koshi Sugawara! :D

Reasoning:

I honestly really struggled with this match at first, there were several good options in my head but none of them felt perfect until I thought about Suga. But he’s a perfect match for all of the things you look for in a partner, his love languages I feel would align very well with yours, and I think he’d just really like you as a person in general!

Headcanons About Your Relationship:

- To start off, Suga would definitely find you absolutely beautiful :> I think he’s an especially big fan of your freckles and beauty marks, they’re his favorite place to press kisses on and sometimes if you lay in his lap, he likes to try and count your freckles because he just finds them so cute

- He also loves your attitude, he finds your confidence so admirable. He knows exactly how wonderful you are, and it makes him so happy that you know that too, and that you don’t take shit from anyone or worry too much about the opinions of others. He’s definitely the type of boyfriend who would hype you up and tell you how awesome you are regularly

- But he’s also the type to enjoy some playful teasing! He loves your sarcasm and can easily give it right back, but it’s always playful and light. He just loves how comfortable the two of you are together, your dynamic is so playful and loving <3

- I think he’d also find it super endearing how you like to draw on him. He may occasionally whine about it when teasing you, but in reality I’m sure he loves showing up to practice sporting your beautiful drawings and bragging to all of his teammates about how his wonderful girlfriend drew them :] He literally takes any chance to show you off, he’s so proud to be yours

- And when he’s not being playful, I think he’s definitely an acts of service kind of boyfriend. Suga often grabs you a cup of boba or a pack of mochi if he’s out and about, and he loves just doing small things for you like making lunches for you with all of your favorite fruits and foods :> But he usually steers clear of vegetables because he knows you don’t like them!

- He absolutely loves your taste in media too! I feel like Suga would be an absolute sucker for rom-coms, he seems like the type to get super invested in them and is always criticizing the main character’s decisions lol. And he loves watching kids movies like Kung Fu Panda with you too! It’s a nice, relaxing way for him to unwind with you after a long day of practice, and he loves seeing the smile on your face whenever you get to share your favorite movies with him

- He also loves your random facts. He finds it to be such an endearing habit whenever you randomly sprout off a fact he never would have even thought to look up himself, and after being together with you for some time, I feel like he’d find himself in the habit of randomly sharing the same facts you tell to him with all of his teammates when it’s one he finds particularly interesting

- He’s definitely the kind of guy who’s comfortable bot with rambling and chatter and with silence depending on the mood, and he’s happy to each get time on your own as well as together. He loves spending time with you, and he cherishes the time you two get together like nothing else. But he also appreciates that you’re someone who wants time to yourself/with your friends, and honestly, he thinks it’s a really healthy balance to have in your relationship. He doesn’t expect to be attached to your hip 24/7, he just enjoys and makes the most of the time you two do spend together

- And he’s also a great partner when it comes to respecting your boundaries, admitting his faults and taking accountability when he’s upset you. He’s very big on communication, and when you tell him that something he’s done makes you upset or unhappy, he’s more than willing to accept that and change his behavior. You mean more to him than anyone else and he’d never want to make you uncomfortable, so he’s more than happy to adapt to and respect your needs <3

Second Choice:

Honestly I had several people in mind when I first thought of your match-up, but once I thought of Suga, all of the other options just didn’t feel quite perfect in comparison. I do think that bot Iwaizumi and Akaashi could have also been good matches for you, as they would both meet most if not all of your needs in a partner, I just felt tha overall Suga would match your energy perfectly and was the best fit as a partner for you :>

Song For Your Relationship:

Would You Be So Kind by Dodie <3

For JJK, I’d Match You With:

Suguru Geto! :D

Reasoning:

Honestly, as soon as I read your description of yourself I felt like Suguru would be the perfect match for you. I think you’re the kind of person who would quickly catch his attention, and he meets everything you need from a partner to a t. I just think the two of you would mesh perfectly together in all honesty!

Headcanons About Your Relationship:

- Honestly I feel like you and Suguru are similar in a lot of ways, he loves how you’re not afraid to openly be yourself and share your thoughts and how perceptive you can be. He’s definitely respected you a lot ever since he first met you, the similarities between the two of you were honestly what drew him to you and made him so attracted to you from the very beginning

- He also finds you beautiful, though, of course. I think he’d love your piercings, and he enjoys having someone to go look for jewelry with even if you guys don’t wear the exact same kind. And I feel like he’d be a complete sucker for your curly hair as well, he thinks it’s so so beautiful 

- I also think he would love your taste in movies! He would definitely be a big fan of Edward Scissorhands, he’s a lover of Tim Burton in general so he’d be happy to watch that movie over and over with you or play it in the background as the two of you spend time together. He loves thrillers in general too, though I do think he’d enjoy a good romantic comedy as well as long as he can get invested in the plot

- Arcade dates are some of his all-time favorite dates to take you on! He loves competing against you and teasing one another on the two-player games, but when you’re playing on your own and you’re not opponents he loves cheering you on lol (And he feels a small rush of pride if you do the same to him when he’s playing) He enjoys taking you to amusement parks too, loves cheesy things like kissing on the ferris wheel and will easily win you a prize at one of the games if you want him to <3

- He’s the kind of boyfriend who’s happy to kill/dispose of bugs for you when you spot them. He may occasionally tease you about it, but he doesn’t mind bugs at all no matter how big or gross they are, so he quickly becomes your de-facto bug killer

- And Suguru would be very good at showing you love in the ways you crave the most. He’s always doing small things to help you out or make you smile, half of the time you don’t even notice when he’s done something for you because he doesn’t mention it. He doesn’t do things for praise, he just likes to make your life easier and make you feel seen and loved <3 

- He’s also very good at finding a balance of independence and connection in your relationship. He enjoys having time for both of you to enjoy on your own or with your own groups of friends, but he also makes sure you two get plenty of time together despite his busy schedule. And he loves small displays of affection whenever the two of you are out together, he’s always holding your hand just as a small way of showing you off especially when you’re around his friends

- He finds your habit of drawing on him so cute, and when he’s stressed, the feeling of your pen running along his skin honestly helps calm him down and pull him away from the stressed and overwhelmed thoughts flowing through his mind. And he enjoys a more alternative aesthetic anyways, so he enjoys the look of the “tattoos” you leave on him and likes to show him off when he gets the chance

Second Choice:

This one I honestly didn’t struggle with nearly as much, Geto felt like he met all of your needs and wants in a partner perfectly. If I were to consider another character, maybe I’d pick either Yuji or Nanami. Both feel like they meet the majority of your qualifications for a partner, but Suguru just felt perfect in practically every aspect and I think he’s definitely the best match for you overall!

Song For Your Relationship:

It's You by Ali Gatie <3

[lonlonranching]

Rambles of the more fun sort:

So a friend and i wanna make an rpg (who is to say if this will come to life? At the moment, we are having fun just coming up with ideas about it, bouncing them off one anothers brain, excited when we come to the SAME conclusions. Excited when we don’t. It’s been great). We are starting to think about how we’d like to sort out the gameplay and style - and my brain goes to games like earthbound/mother and generally gba and pixel graphic type stuff (partly because that’s what we grew up on, and partly because, apparently, gba style games are shockingly easier to make versus my original idea to code a choose-your-own-adventure text-based rpg through my limited knowledge of python).

We’ve been fleshing the main character out, who works at a used video game store (the ones that give you a nickel for a game and then resell for $150 - and a lot of the story is inspired by personal interest and where I live, and there’s a franchise like that here sooo projecting my own heavy anti-work sentiments and contempt for arbitrage and greed). I like when games give you some say in the character you play, in terms of their interests and idiosyncrasies, but at the same time, the creator is the one who gives that character a soul, or whatever you believe what someone is at their conception. and, that, can then be integral to the story at hand. How to find a balance (i dont have an answer, but it’s a hypothetical i’ll be thinking about elsewhere in the dome drain)

I am someone who is driven by character-based narratives, and more often, drawn to them. i like worldbuilding, actually I love it, but what I am interested in is how characters interact with the world. And, too, how the world then interacts with them. There’s a Butler quote from parable that has always stuck out to me: “all that you touch you change. All that you change changes you.” I’ve never been able to stop thinking about it, so it appears all around me, internally and externally.

on another note, but stay with me if youre here to begin with, because i swear itll all connect! Over the past 4 years, I’ve been writing a story, meaning i didn’t write any of it at all and it lives entirely in my head (and, in the air when I share with friends, on notebook paper when i want to draw out a joke, and, ok, about a million bullet lists on my google drive, so ive written a little - but do we count incohesive thoughts? I think I might have to, because that’s my whole entire life). It's about a kid in college named Newt who wanted more time to play video game but their RA job involved a lot more cryptids native to where I live than expected, and supernatural beings that aren’t really native anywhere (Back where I am in reality, I’m still holding out - just because I haven’t seen a vampire doesn’t mean they aren’t out there. Just because I haven’t knowingly met one, doesn’t mean I haven’t. I’d convince you I’m not unhinged, but I can’t convince myself). The story is also, if not largely, if not entirely, about having relationships that are unconventional.

I didn’t really understand myself while I was working on this little story. And that’s exactly why I created it. I desperately wanted to, and Newt, as well as the other characters, gave me an outlet for self-exploration. I wanted to consider concepts of relationships that felt “unrealistic” compared to what I saw in common practice - people who loved each other in different ways and different forms. And the way I was writing these, dare I call, love stories was through people being totally honest with themselves, and then naturally, with others. that had always been hard for me: honesty. i think sometimes it still can be. Call me a self-insert writer! Because honest to god I am. Every single character I write is a part of me I want to connect with.

Anyway, Newt becomes close to several different characters throughout the story (Gerb, another RA who has this sort of one-sided rivalry with Newt who actually just really wants to be liked by them; Carmilla, a vampire who finds an unconventional interest in Newt that makes her question her own notions of love; and the Sqwonk, which if im the first person telling you about the saddest western pennsylvania crytpid in my beloved hemlock backyards, boy howdy am i honored.) Gerbs and Carmillas relationships with Newt are very near and dear to me because they explore love in non-romantic contexts. the kicker is that i had NO clue i was aromantic at this point in time (heavily when i was still in my undergrad, so 2020 era). i think i confused a lot people describing these relationships, especially Newt and Carmillas, as i was very clear it wasnt exactly romantic, but it was just as, if not more, powerful (i caused so many 404 error blue screens for alloromantic/allosexuals - sorry! i was just as confused). the one thing i knew was that i wanted to experience the types of relationships i was writing, but at the time, i thought they could only exist on paper, in my head, in a reality much different than one with cryptids and leylines and witches and demons (it covers a lot - maybe one day ill get inspired to write about it more on here)

but im learning now that it really isnt that different ! or maybe that it doesnt have to be! that you can pursue and define relationships in a vast amount of ways. the one thing that has been helpful, is finding the way to communication that. i always felt indifferent about language - having remembered learning that language abides by the ways people need it, but i felt languge was only a barrier for me. i didnt know HOW to talk about about the ways in which i felt, to myself or to others. i wasnt sure how to use words to communicate. and while i didnt know how to talk about feelings, i innately knew how to feel feelings, even if they were buried deep. but i convinced myself most of the time my feelings were endlessly wrong. that i could feel the way others felt if i tried hard enough.

nope. not how that works! it just took me 24 years to figure this out.

ANYWAY, me and a friend are trying to make a rpg. me and this person are vastly different in infinite number of ways, but yesterday on a discord call i asked him what he was thinking to do with the main character, he told me he first wanted to enable some sort of attributes to signify gender and sexuality, but after coming out to him, he really wanted to, if i wanted to, make them aro.

I immediately turned my face away from the camera, for fear they saw 24 years worth of emotions surface on my pixeled face, and then i wondered why i still needed to hide that from them. realizing i didnt, i turned back, and told them I’d really like that

im even more excited to play around with this rpg idea now. here are my expectations: to try and make it. I don’t care if it's not good. I don’t care if anyone else plays it but me and my friend (I don’t even know if i fully want people too, beyond those i know either irl or on the internet corners im cozily tucked into). i really want to make a game about an aroace person. I really, really want to make a game about relationships. Relationships with yourself, with others, the world around. how they can change your life. how your life, and who’s in it, can change you.

[sabertoothwalrus]

How did you get so good at drawing such expressive bodies/faces??? tell me your secrets!! (But srsly your skills are amazing)

AAAA THANK YOU!!

I think my initial inspiration was about 10-11 years ago watching Adventure Time and finding Rebecca Sugar’s boards. Sometimes I get a little frustrated because she gets so much more notoriety than the other very very amazing AT boarders, but….. her expressions man…. she was always able to convey so much with SO LITTLE. (SU’s expressions are on another level of course, but I think AT’s are just so impressive to me because they’re dot eyes)

But the thing is!! I’m also a fan of deadpan. Which AT also does very well. It’s tempting to want to do BIG, extreme expressions at every moment, especially in comedic comics, but you really don’t need to. I find that characters often feel more expressive if you reel it in more often. That way, when you DO have bigger expressions, they FEEL bigger!

for example, a panel where the contrast between big and subtle expressions sells the contrast:

I don’t really,,,, know exactly what I do that works, ?? I kind of just like, think of the emotion I wanna convey, make the expression, think about what my face feels feels like, and try to convey that. Using a mirror helps!! You’ll feel a little stupid but it’s funny.

some misc expression tips:

Definitely prioritize eyebrows, eyes, and mouths!

Noses aren’t as important BUT flared nostril can totally sell an expression, so it depends!

Remember that your upper jaw is stationary, and your lower jaw can move, and then your lips and cheeks can move all around that!

Just subtly changing the placement of eyelids and location/size of irises can completely change an expression

Don’t be afraid to make your characters look weird or stupid.

Don’t reinvent the wheel! Take reference from different media you like that stylize expressions in different ways, and find what works for you. I take a lot of inspiration from AtLA

Again, NUANCE! Like, when most people are sad, they do their very best to try NOT to cry. People hold things in. Sometimes what characters don’t say can speak louder than what they do.

some expressions I’ve done that have varying levels of nuance:

Also framing!! You can use the composition to help project how the character feels:

As for body language!

Having a better sense of three-dimensional form and anatomy isn’t necessary, but it sure helps a lot

Hands!! I have adhd and my family is italian so I use my hands a lot when I talk. But even still, most people don’t just leave their hands hanging loosely by their sides. People cross their arms and fidget with their zippers and put their hands in pockets.

Head, neck, and shoulders. If you can master the foreshortening of these overlapping shapes at most angles, you will be very powerful

Hips & feet!!!!! People RARELY stand straight with both feet flat on the ground with even balance. Most people will shift their weight to one hip, leaving one leg looser and at an angle. It also helps to practice perspective, because people also rarely stand with their heels lined up side by side. One leg may get kicked foreward or loosely bent backwards. I sometimes cross my legs when I stand.

Ultimately, if you want more lifelike expressions and poses, study from life!! Don’t worry about your drawing being “good” or “bad”, instead think about what can make it successful. Ask yourself, “is this conveying the expression I want to convey?” and if it’s not, figure out what you need to change to get it there.

[britishmuffin]

Hello, Britishmuffin

I hope you are having a wonderful day/night.

Just wanted to know what inspires you to make such amazing art pieces? As well how do you deal with art block?

Im a artist myself but times get tuff and I lose motivation and start developing art block.

Sincerely, fisheggsoup :)

Morning! Love your name :D

Truthfully, my biggest motivator is born of necessity these days. I create art because I have bills to pay and family to support. My patrons are a huge driving force in all this, cheering me on from the sidelines while I work; my band of blessed saviours.

I also make sure that my social feeds are full of artists I love, who make art that makes me happy. I'm always watching films and playing games, always constantly absorbing media in this wacky age of technology-infused information. Then if I'm lucky, I get the chance to step outside for a walk in the woods with my sibling to help ground ourselves in the world and reconnect with nature, pure medicine for the troubled soul.

All of these activities serve to stir the Brain Soup and sometimes reflect in my artwork. I rarely get struck with the "fabled bolt of inspiration" these days, but I blame the current climate. I did used to.

As some of you will already know because I'm being quite open about it this time, I'm currently battling the worst bout of burnout I've had in literal years. So really, I'm not sure I'm the best person to be asking on the topic of how to deal with it, but here you go:

In my experience it’s not the best idea to wait for inspiration to strike. Inspiration is unreliable, constantly waiting can leave you anxious, and also most of us just don’t have the luxury of being able to. I kinda think we just need to create despite it (or TO spite it, or in order to spite someone who told you you couldn't, if that's your sauce).

If you feel like your art sucks, instead of expecting perfection try just giving yourself permission to be bad at art for a while, you might be surprised about how much of a relief it feels. Make a hundred terrible little sketches, doodles, scribbles, or just make marks on paper. You don’t even have to show them to anyone, they can be just for your eyes! More often than not I’ve found that the physical act of creating artwork can genuinely inspire you to make more, and better work. It flexes those art muscles and gets the creative cogs whirring. Just make stuff!!!

As a person who’s had little choice but to create for years, it can be really helpful to push through it. Not always, though.

Sometimes the art block you’re staring down actually goes layers deep into the realms of debilitating mental health and poor living status, right into dangerous burnout and breakdown territory. Some would argue that creating art in times of real pain is the best medicine, and indeed, creates the best results. I wholly disagree.

My advice is to always make art in those moments when you can, even if it sucks. And when you just can’t, then rest. Watch your favourite guilty pleasure anime, cook some delicious food, hug your pets, go exist in nature for a bit. Have you ever seen Kiki’s Delivery Service? That!

Helpful links to combat art block:

Line of Action has great learning resources, while also being a brilliant tool for a variety of speedy sketch warm-ups

Don’t know what to draw? Use a character description generator!

You could flex your figure drawing muscles with models on Figurosity, AdorkaStock, or ArtModels360 (nudity warning)

Improve your fundamental art skills with Drawabox or videos on The Fix List

Generate some colour palettes to use as a challenge. Adobe’s colour wheel tool isn’t too bad either

Other more practical tips include:

If you struggle staying motivated, try to refocus by sitting down and asking yourself "What kind of art do I really want to create?” Try to rediscover what excites you! Is your aim to work in the art industry? To be able to draw your OCs smooching? Draw beefy bara men? Do you really just wanna paint cool rocks? All valid af

Pull up images of your favourite artworks and study them. Ask yourself “Why do I like this artwork?” Are the outfits really cool designs? Is the lineart super stylish? Do you love the way they used colours? After that, think about what you need to learn to get to that point yourself, and start small. Mimic your favourite artworks in order to learn how to do it.

Example: If you realise that you want to improve at drawing hands, just spend a week learning about them. Draw pages and pages of them, find a way to make them fun and sexy to draw! I did just that, and now hands are actually one of my favourite things to draw, it works.

Warm-ups are SO important. If you just started on a piece and already feel defeated, ask yourself “Did I warm up enough first?” You can try looping fifty quick spirals in different sizes with your pen, scratch out some box shapes, doodle some funky wiggly shapes, crosshatch them, whatever you want! Just get that hand moving before you leap into your artwork of choice, it helps to loosen up to keep your lines from becoming too stiff.

If it’s just not working today, that’s okay. Take a break by filtering your creativity into another entirely different creative pursuit. You could try baking something tasty, making music, writing for your next D&D campaign, building cute houses in minecraft or the sims, painting miniatures, crafting with paper or sewing fabric, etc etc. Anything that keeps the creative brain ticking that isn’t drawing is also worthwhile.

And, mentally:

Try not to worry about what other people think of your artwork. Doesn’t matter what age you are or your background, the fact you’ve created anything at all is incredible. You brought something into the world that didn’t exist before. You’re powerful as hell.

Related: please please please don’t focus on being “successful” on social media. Even though I know it can feel awesome to post your art and get instant reactions, these things are a death spiral of addictive behaviour and shouldn’t dictate your creativity. Use sparingly.

Remember that your kid self would absolutely be losing their mind over the cool stuff you’ve made now. Same goes for your ancient ancestors who used to make those little clay animals. You’re doing great, be proud.

Don’t be so damn hard on yourself. I mean it <3

If you keep drawing you will improve. You will get your motivation back. You will make art again even if it takes you a while. And know that a muffin is cheering for you c:

[sugawaraxo]

sex tape

warnings: smut ofc

characters: yu nishinoya, ryu tanaka, tetsoru kuroo, koutarou bokuto

request: Hc of asking your man to make a sex tape with you? With Nishinoya, Tanaka, Kuroo, and Bokuto please! 🖤

a/n: i really like bokuto’s, his was fun to write lol

nishinoya

- with nishinoya traveling all the time because of volleyball, it gets extremely hard not to miss him a lot when he’s gone

- especially when you’re craving his touch 

- most times you’re able to satisfy yourself decently well, but sometimes it’s just not enough

- and porn does absolutely nothing to help you because watching other people fuck just isn’t the same as watching as nishinoya fucks you

- so you get an idea that sparks both yours and nishinoya’s attention

- he’s very excited

“babe, can i ask you something?” you say while you massage noya’s scalp, his head resting in your lap comfortably as you two lay on the couch.

“hm?” he hums, teetering on the verge of sleep at the gentle feeling of your touch.

“what if we made a sex tape?” you question and noya’s head shoots up to look at you, eyes wide with interest.

“is this a joke? like some sort of prank? please tell me it’s not a prank.” he begs and you laugh at his response.

“no, it’s not a prank. i was just thinking about it and sometimes, when you’re away, i get really needy and it’s hard to get the kind of pleasure i’m looking for without you here. so maybe if we make a little sex tape, i can have something to watch and help when you’re away.” you explain. nishinoya stares at you blankly, his brain slowly processing each word you just said. the thought of you getting all needy when he’s not here and touching yourself while watching a video of him fucking you was more than enough to make him and his mini noya very excited. 

“is that even a question? i’m so down, can we do it right now?” he asks eagerly causing you to laugh at him again. 

“i mean, i don’t see why not.” you shrug.

nishinoya props himself up so that he’s hovering above you and he kisses you deeply. your lips always work together so perfectly, synchronizing in a nice steady rhythm. his hands are traveling all over your body in an attempt to get you as aroused as he already is, and it works without a doubt. noya continues kissing you and lightly grazing your sides with his fingers or rubbing small circles on your inner thighs until he earns a moan from you that makes him grin. 

“i know how i want to start the sex tape.” he says confidently.

“how?” 

“grab your phone and start recording.” is his only response. you grab your phone from beside you on the couch and open the camera app, pressing record and waiting for noya’s next move. he slides down your body and effortlessly discards your shorts, tossing them off to the side somewhere. he looks down in between your legs then up at you, you watching him through the screen of your phone. he gives the camera a small smirk before pressing a kiss on the lower part of your tummy, trailing more soft kisses all over your thighs, hips, and waist. he then lightly moves his lips over your core which was only being covered by the thin lace of your underwear. you begin to grow a bit impatient at nishinoya’s teasing, writhing under his gentle yet alluring kisses.

“noya, please.” you whine softly and he looks up at you for a quick second before pulling your panties down and tossing them somewhere unknown. he wastes no time pressing his mouth against your warm folds, licking circles around your clit repetitively. you to let out an airy gasp of his name and he continues to work his mouth around your clit for awhile, progressively sucking and licking more and more aggressively, just so he could selfishly earn more moans from you that make his dick painstakingly hard. and as if his tongue relentlessly moving around your clit wasn’t enough, he sticks two fingers inside of you and curls them upward to hit your spot. 

“holy shit noya.” you moan, reaching your free hand down to grip onto his hair lightly while trying to maintain a steady grip on your phone with the other. he looks up at you and you nearly cum at the sight. his eyes are blown with lust and his face is flushed a pretty shade of pink. you just know this part of the video is going to constantly be on replay when it’s finished. you absentmindedly start jutting your hips against noya’s tongue, a thing you do when you’re about to unravel.

you giving him the clear sign that you’re about to cum is noya’s cue to stop, so he removes his fingers from your soaking hole and wipes his mouth clean as he sits up between your legs. you whimper a little at the cum denial, but you know exactly why he did it.

“wanna see you cum with me inside you.” he mumbles, confirming your guess. 

“me too.” you respond and he smiles down at you softly which makes your heart jump. he pulls his pants down along with his boxers revealing his member. his tip is dripping with precum and you feel your pussy clench as you look at it. nishinoya takes his shirt off before saying, “yours too” and you remove yours aswell. he looks at your now fully nude body and sighs,

“how’d i get so fucking lucky?” he coos and for the second time, your hearts jumps and you can’t help but smile at his words. he presses himself at your entrance, teasing it slowly and you adjust the camera angle so that you can get more of noya’s face and body in it because that’ll come in handy later. he slides into you at a teasingly slow pace, drawing out the loud moan that’s leaving your lips. once he’s all the way in, he looks at the camera and winks before pulling out and thrusting back into you, hitting your spot perfectly. you planned on rolling your eyes at his cockiness, but your eyes end up squeezing shut at the sudden excess of pleasure.

“that feel good?” noya asks, already knowing the answer but still wanting to fuel his ego. you can’t even answer in actual words as he continues to thrust into you deeply, so you just nod and moan in response. he grins in satisfaction and thrusts into you a bit harder, not letting up on wanting to milk you of every moan you could possibly utter. he wants this video to be really nice for you since he feels guilty about being away for so long sometimes. he wants to make you feel so good so that every time you look back at this, you remember how amazing he can make you feel. he reaches down to play with your nipples a bit, making you squirm in pleasure. you use your free hand to start playing with your throbbing clit, not being able to hold back the lewd noises building in your throat. you’re a moaning mess beneath him, shaking and struggling to keep the camera steady as you get closer to your orgasm.

“here, let me take it.” noya says, grabbing the phone from you as he notices you struggling. he focuses it down on you, watching himself go in and out of you on the screen and he lets out a groan.

“noya, i’m so close.” you whimper, your chest heaving heavily as you start rubbing your clit more aggressively.

“good girl, cum for me.” nishinoya coos, making his thrusts sharper and deeper against your g-spot.

a few more thrusts and you’re arching your back off the couch and practically screaming nishinoya’s name. he smirks as you tremble beneath him, the sight completely destroying him aswell. he pulls out of you and cums all over your stomach, grunting and panting while he reaches his peak.

he wipes his mess up with his fingers then places them at your mouth, you sucking all of his faintly salty remnants off obediently and his cock twitches. after getting that all on camera, noya stops the recording and collapses next to you.

“that felt so good.” you sigh before placing a kiss on his cheek.

“it really did.” he replies, returning a kiss on your forehead. “now you can watch it whenever you want. and you better send me that video, i need it too.” he continues, handing you back your phone. you laugh at his statement and give him a quick peck before sending him the video.

you guys definitely watch it that night and go for another round.

tanaka

- he would be the one to bring it up actually

- tanaka just enjoys taking lewd photos of you in general

- he’ll come up behind you as you look at yourself in the mirror after getting ready and take a handful of your boob before snapping a pic

- or he’ll have you sit on his lap, facing towards him so he can take a mirror pic of him grabbing your ass like that

- he doesn’t post them or anything, but just likes looking at them every once in awhile

-  he did print out the ass grabbing one and put it on the dash board of his car though

- it makes him feel a sense of security that he’s the only one you’ll pose in pictures like that for 

- and he’s always had the desire to film you guys while having sex, to have a permanent memory of the encounter

- which is no surprise to you

tanaka is balls deep in your mouth, fucking your face at a slow yet rough tempo while muttering all sorts of nonsense as he does so. he’s leaning against the edge of the kitchen counter and you’re resting on your knees in front him, pleasing him the way he loves the most. your eyes are shut tightly as you try your best not to choke on tanaka’s length, them beginning to brim with tears a bit at the feeling of him continuously thrusting into the back of your throat. you open your eyes so that the tears would fall and you could wipe them away. but when you open them, you’re met with tanaka’s phone camera facing down at you and him looking at you with a shy smile.

“is this ok?” he asks, motioning to his phone.

“mhmm.” you hum, your mouth too full to talk.

you think it’s kind of hot being recorded actually. knowing that tanaka will go back and watch this vid countless times the same way you always catch him looking at the nsfw pictures that you two take every so often. it also gives you the motivation to be a little extra with your sucking. you wanna make tanaka weak with moans so whenever he goes back to watch the video, he’s reminded of just how crazy he is for your lips around his dick.

you hollow your cheeks a bit more, moving your wet mouth down his shaft at a teasing pace, maintaining eye contact with him in the process. he throws his head back and lets out a deep groan as your nose touches his abdomen, you completely taking tanaka’s length down your throat. 

“holy fuck y/n.” tanaka pants and you smirk, now circling the tip of his dick with your tongue. you suck the tip gently, remembering to slide your tongue over the slit occasionally which causes tanaka to grip your hair roughly as he moans your name. he watches you through his phone screen, basking in the fact that he knows this will be his favorite video on the planet.  

“i’m not gonna last very long if you keep this up.” he sighs breathlessly, looking down at you through hooded eyes. it’s taking every bit of his strength not to just release in your mouth right then, because you look so destroyed on his cock. there’s saliva and precum on your swollen lips and rolling down your chin in thin clear strands, your face is stained with the tears that spilled from your eyes whenever you took tanaka’s full length down your throat, and your hair is a little messy from tanaka instinctively gripping it whenever he feels his tip hit the back of your throat. it’s definitely a sight to see, a sight that has tanaka teetering on his edge. you’re about to try deepthroating him again, but he pulls you off by your hair and gestures for you to stand up.

“bend over the counter.” he grunts.

you get up and rest your stomach on the edge of the cold counter, bending over for him. he lifts one of your legs, placing it on the counter while you maintain balance with the other still planted on the floor. now your cunt is fully exposed to him and both of you shiver, you at the feeling and him at the view. tanaka makes sure he has a decent camera angle before thrusting into you. no teasing, no gimmicks, just straight to it. your body lurches forward a bit, tanaka is not taking it easy on you today and you don’t mind at all. his eyes are glued to your ass on his phone screen, watching it bounce every time he thrusts into you.

“fuck.” he moans, the grip that his free hand has on your hip growing a bit tighter. you’re whimpering with each thrust, each and every one of them hitting that spot that makes you feel dizzy. if anyone were to speak to you right now, anything you tried to say would sound like a bunch of babbling. that’s the power tanaka’s cock has over you, and he absolutely loves it.

“you ok down there baby?” he asks but you can hear the smirk he’s carrying in his tone. you say nothing, just continue to let your sweet, loud moans bounce off the walls of the kitchen. tanaka pulls you up so that your leg is still lifted on the counter, but your back is pressed flush against his body. he switches to the selfie camera and sets the phone down, resting it against a vase on the countertop so that both of you are in view.

“i want you to cum like this, ok?” he says and you nod eagerly in return. he begins thrusting into you again, placing tender kisses on the sides of your neck while his hands roam all over your body. you watch him on the phone screen, he looks just as fucked out as you do which makes you pulse around him. you move your hand down to your clit, knowing that neither of you would last much longer. tanaka slows the speed of his thrusts, but increases the precision as he aims directly for your special spot. 

“oh my god ryu, i’m gonna- fuck, you’re gonna make me cum.” you moan, throwing your head back against his shoulder and he looses it, just as well as you do.

he pulls out of you and cums all over your backside, some dripping onto the floor as you use the counter to stable yourself from your weakening legs. he kisses your shoulder before reaching down to grab his phone and stop the recording. then he grabs your hips and turns you towards him and plants a gentle kiss on your lips.

“that was insanely hot.” he says as he uses the back of his hand to wipe the sweat from his forehead.

“you’re telling me.” you sigh, still shaking slightly from your orgasm. he cleans up the mess he made on the floor with a paper towel, then makes his way back over to you and picks you up bridal style. 

“well let’s go shower and maybe we can record another one while we’re in there.” tanaka smirks and you shake your head as you laugh.

i guess that’s what happens when you have a boyfriend with high stamina.

kuroo

- like tanaka, kuroo would initiate it

- kuroo loves to take pictures and videos of you to show you off

- like he’s definitely one of those boyfriend’s whose instagram has more pictures of their partner than themselves

- he just thinks you’re so cute and wants the whole world to know you’re his

- but he doesn’t want them to know what you guys do behind closed doors

- so those pics and videos stay private, for his and your eyes only

- but he definitely loves taking them while you guys are in the heat of the moment

- is 100% the type to fuck you while watching your own sex tape

“kuroo, i’m kinda in the mood to ride you.” you say bluntly to your boyfriend who is sitting across from you on the couch. he pulls his phone away from his line of vision so he could look at you, searching for any signs of a joke in your expression. but you’re dead serious.

“i mean, what am i supposed to say to that? no?” he smirks that infamous smirk of his and you have to force yourself not to roll your eyes.

“just wanted to give you a heads up is all.” you say, climbing your way over to him and straddling his lap. he lays his phone on his chest and his hands instinctively find their way to your thighs, rubbing the smooth skin gently. 

“hm, go for it. i’m all yours.” he grins then lifts his arms above his head as if permitting you access to his body. you smile down at him amusedly, desire eating away at you as you process his appearance. he’s shirtless, so his muscular build is on full display for you to inherently drool over. he’s wearing a pair of shorts made of the same material sweatpants are made out of, the fabric loosely resting on his hips dangerously low now that you’re sitting there and unintentionally pulling them down a bit. he catches your wandering eyes and chuckles at you.

“you know you can look and touch, right kitten?” he teases and you allow yourself to roll your eyes at him this time.

“sheesh, can i not just admire my hot boyfriend?” you huff jokingly before rubbing your hands up his chest and down his torso tenderly. you don’t fail to miss the slight blush raising over the bridge of kuroo’s nose which makes you smile.

“only if you let me admire you back.” he says, tugging at the hem of your shirt as a signal for you to take it off. you do, bringing the piece of clothing over your head slowly, quite literally feeling kuroo’s gaze burning through you the entire time. once your top half is just as naked as kuroo’s, he starts massaging your boobs lightly and you let out a sigh at his touch. he moves his hands down your sides and over your thighs, letting them rest there again while rubbing his thumbs over your now tingling skin. 

“can’t wait to watch you fuck yourself on my cock.” he groans as he scans over your entire body with eager eyes and a flush of heat runs through your body. 

“yeah?” you question, beginning to roll your hips over his clothed shaft. his breath hitches and he picks up his phone that’s still laying on his chest.

“mhm, i’m gonna record it. so put on a show for me.” he grins and you feel a surge of arousal flow through you. you pull off the only piece of clothing you have left which is a simple pair of underwear, and pull down kuroo’s bottoms just enough so that you can get what you need. you grind your damp cunt against kuroo’s now hardening member in an attempt to get him fully erect. it works with ease, him getting hard for you in just a matter of seconds as he watches you desperately rock your hips against him. 

you reach down beneath your body, grabbing his length and giving it a couple strokes before placing his tip at your center sinking down on him and feeling every inch stretch and fill you up perfectly. you let out a shaky breath and kuroo holds back a moan by biting his lip harshly. you begin to set a steady pace for yourself, lifting your hips up and letting them fall back down slowly enough for you to get used to kuroo’s above average size. you sturdy yourself by placing your hands on his chest, now picking up the pace of your movements. 

“you’re so hot.” kuroo groans as he reaches down to grab your ass before giving it a harsh spank. you wince at the pain, but also moan at the pleasure from him massaging the cheek afterwards. you lift yourself a bit higher off of his length and sink back down quickly, causing you and kuroo to moan in unison. you continue this, lifting your body all the way up to his tip and then crashing back down to take all of him inside of you, making you both just a jumble of moans and pants. 

“fuck, turn around. i wanna see that ass.” kuroo smirks and you follow his order. your now facing away from him, reverse cowgirl style, while he teases your hole with his tip. he has a firm grasp on his dick as he rubs it against your glistening folds, admiring the view in front of him.

“you ready?” he asks.

“mhm.” you hum. you move your hips around, eagerly waiting to feel him fill you up again. he chuckles at you before pushing himself into you, thrusting a couple times before letting you take the lead again. you start bouncing your hips up and down his shaft and kuroo nearly passes out. watching you ride him with your ass on full display for him is testing his strength, but he pushes through. he grabs onto your ass tightly and guides your hips to move at a bit of a slower pace.

“jesus, fuck.” kuroo moans, his grip on his phone faltering a bit as he begins to feel overwhelmed with pleasure. he tightens his grasp on the phone and starts fucking into you, matching the movements of your hips. 

“yes kuroo, just like that.” you sigh, throwing your head back at the sensation. 

“touch yourself, i want you to cum first.” kuroo breathes and you do as told. you rub your clit as you continue to grind on kuroo’s cock, meeting his thrusts halfway. 

“mm, kuroo-” is all you manage to get out before you’re trembling and moaning, your core pulsating as you orgasm.

“fuck.” kuroo pants as he pulls out of you, giving himself a few tugs before spurting warm cum all over your ass. you two sit like that for a few seconds, letting yourselves regain stability. once you feel as though you can move again, you turn around and lay on kuroo’s chest. he’s still recording so he flips the camera to face you guys, lifts your chin, and presses your lips together lovingly.

“probably the hottest one we’ve recorded yet.” kuroo says after ending recording.

“yeah?” you laugh at his enthusiastic expression.

“mhmm, because you’re the star of it.” he smiles. 

bokuto

- he comes home from practice and finds you waiting on the bed naked with your already recording camera set up on the side table

- babie is FLUSTERED

- like he just stands in the doorway, mouth gaped open, as if he’s too scared to walk in

- he’s seen you naked numerous times but you still take his breath away every time

- he’s so adorable 

- finally snaps out of his trance and joins you on the bed

bokuto removes his shoes and climbs into bed with you. the contrast between him being fully clothed and you being completely naked makes both of you blush a bit.

“what’s all this about?” he asks with a quirked eyebrow, scanning your entire body which makes you tense under his stare.

“umm well, i was thinking about it and i thought it’d be really hot if we made a sex tape.” you explain.

“you wanna make a sex tape?” he questions.

“i mean yeah. it’ll be nice to have something to look back-”

“say less.” he cuts you off and practically tears off his shirt. you giggle at his excitement, already knowing that he was probably going to react this way. within the next few seconds, you aren’t the only naked one anymore and your eyes trail down bokuto’s body. just like how you never fail to amaze him, he never fails to amaze you. the way his toned muscles flex whenever he moves makes all your heat rush to your core. 

“the view’s nice huh?” he teases and flexes his biceps a bit.

“shut up.” you laugh, “but yes, it is.”

bokuto grins at your compliment, then cups your face in his hands and captures your lips with his passionately. your lips mesh together effortlessly, as if you guys were made to kiss each other. bokuto deepens the kiss by swiping your bottom lip with his tongue, alerting you that he’s about to insert it into your mouth. he does just that and you let out a breathy moan that shoots right down to his dick. he hardens at your noises, kissing you deeper just to earn more. you could honestly kiss bokuto for hours. the way he always makes you feel like you’re the most fragile and precious thing he’s ever touched when he kisses you makes you feel overwhelmingly loved. though today’s makeout session is unfortunately cut short when bokuto pulls away and flips you over onto your stomach as if you weigh nothing. you let out a gasp, a little startled by the sudden force.

“sorry babe, i just really need to be inside you right now.” he admits and you laugh a little. you prop yourself up onto your elbows and knees, preparing for bokuto to insert himself into you.

“mm, look at that. all pretty and perched up for me.” he groans, rubbing your exposed cunt with two fingers. you tense at his light yet arousing touch, desperately wanting him to do more. as if he read your mind, he inserts those fingers inside of you at an antagonizing pace. you move your hips back in an attempt to speed up the friction but instead he pulls his fingers out and rests his hand on your ass.

“be” he spanks one cheek, “patient.” he finishes as he spanks the other. you whine at the stinging yet pleasurable pain and bokuto smiles sadistically while entering his fingers back inside you at a much faster rate. you moan as you watch yourself on your phone screen. you intentionally set it up using the selfie camera so that you could watch as bokuto fucked you senseless on the screen, and boy are you glad you did that. the smug look on his face while he fingerfucks you and thrusts into his own hand makes you clench around his fingers, craving something a bit bigger than the two digits.

“please just fuck me kou, i need it.” you moan. bokuto tries to pretend he’s not flustered by your words but is clearly taken aback. he could be the dominant one all he wants, but it’ll never change the fact that he goes completely weak when you beg for him.

“yeah? you want me to fuck you?” he grins, pulling his fingers out and replacing them with the tip of his painfully hard member.

“mhmm, please kou.” you hum, knowing that begging gets you anything you want with him. this instance just further proves that statement because he begins pushing into you at the same antagonizing speed he moved his fingers at. but you can’t complain since it helps a lot with getting used to his size, because he most definitely does not have the smallest tool in the shed. he continues slowly pushing his way in until his lower abdomen is pressed against your ass, his cock buried deep within your tight hole.

“fuck, you feel so good.” he moans. you glance at your phone to see what he looks like and his head is thrown back, eyes shut tightly and mouth open slightly. your body tingles at the sight, pleasure is written all over his expression and you love it. he pulls out of you and thrusts back into you with brute force. his favorite thing to do ever since he learned that it makes you scream. he pulls out of you exceptionally slowly, waits a short second, and then slam back into you relentlessly. your toes curl at his his little trick and you bury your face into a pillow in an attempt to muffle your loud moans of his name and plenty other profanities. he does this a few more times, smirking at the way you’re completely falling apart beneath him, then takes a break and fucks you at a more steady pace. though he’s no longer pounding into your sweet spot, his tip is still brushing against it and your head goes fuzzy with pleasure.

“you fuck me so good kotaro.” you moan into the pillow, gripping the sheets around you tightly.

“only the best for my pretty girl.” he smiles “here, turn over. wanna see your face.”

you flip over onto your back, now looking up at bokuto who’s smiling down at you lovingly.

“beautiful, so beautiful.” he coos, rubbing his thumb over your cheek softly. your heart drops into your stomach. you know you probably look a hot mess right now. makeup ruined from you shoving your face into a pillow, face flushed from the immense pleasure, and hair a bit messy from it all. but he still thinks you’re the most beautiful girl in existence and your heart almost can’t take it.

“can’t wait to make you cum.” he finishes and without any warning, he grinds his hips into you smoothly yet assertively. he has a tight grip on your hips as he rocks into them and you are just about losing it beneath him. you’re gripping onto his biceps, surely leaving bruises that’ll form by tomorrow. but he doesn’t mind whatsoever. he loves seeing you all fucked out as he pounds into you, sputtering all sorts of moans and lewd words here and there with each thrust. he can tell you won’t be able to hold on for much longer, so he brings his thumb to your clit and rubs small and quick circles on it. he matches the tempo of his thrusts and watches you turn into a blabbering mess at his touch.

“fuck kou, jesus christ. i can’t-you’re gonna make me-oh my god-i’m gonna-“

you’re grip on his arms gets a bit tighter as you succumb to your forceful orgasm. your eyes roll back, your back arches off the bed, and you swear your vision goes dark for a few seconds. bokuto can almost never get a full thrust in after seeing you cum and this is no exception to that. as soon as he sees you come undone, he pulls out of you and releases all over your stomach with a rich moan of your name.

“i came so hard i went blind there for a second.” you admit and bokuto busts out laughing.

“shit sorry. not really though.” he shrugs, collapsing next to you.

“hush. i’m just glad we got that all on camera. i’ll definitely be watching that soon. speaking of, can you hand me my phone?”

bokuto reaches over to grab your phone of the nightstand and you stop recording.

“twenty minutes of gold content.” you say as you look at the length of the video.

“wanna make it twenty more?”

“say less.” you reply smugly.

[outerbankies]

new light part 4: underneath the moonlight — rafe cameron

new light series masterlist

summary: you and rafe meet the parents (properly) and go to midsummers together, but not everyone is as smitten with your relationship as you two are.

pairing: rafe x kook reader

warnings: drinking, swearing

a/n: say hello to a few characters (tw: ward) i have had yet to feature thus far 🤗 more of y/n being besties with kelce (and topper this time—our fave obx himbo) there’s a lil drama in this part y’all... into the thick of it. thanks for all the feedback 💖not canon rafe

my writing

yeah if you give me just one night, to meet you underneath the moonlight

You’re startled awake by a loud knock on your bedroom door. You’re squished between 6 feet and 3 inches worth of boy and the pink wall your bed is pushed up against. Rafe always insisted on laying on your outer side, closest to the door of your bedroom. Which means you often woke up pressed into the wall, your neck sometimes aching from the awkward angle. Not to mention Wilbur always taking up the space at your feet, Rafe usually nudging him into your space so he could stretch out.

Rafe stirs also, making sleepy noises and stretching his legs where they hang off the end of your bed. He grumbles and smacks his lips together a few times, your hand instinctively coming to rub along his jaw. His eyes flutter open as the sun streams in through your window, illuminating the hint of golden stubble on his chin. You’d only slept over together a few times, since you were both staying with your parents for the summer, so it’s always nice to wake up with your boy in your bed.

Oh fuck. Your boy is in your bed.

Rafe's eyes widen at the same time as yours.

“Oh shit, we fell asleep?” he whispers, head whipping around your room.

“Fuck, you have to hide right now,” you whisper, stumbling through your thoughts sleepily.

Another knock sounds from the door.

You extract yourself from your spot between Rafe and the wall, his hands guiding you by your hips as you tumble over him.

“Just, fuck, just like—get under the covers or something. God, I hope it’s not my dad,” you whisper.

“Me too,” he says, slinking into the gap between your bed and the wall as best he can, covering his face with a pillow.

You check that he’s concealed enough, turning to open the door just the slightest bit. Dylan stands in the crack.

“We have brunch at the Club in an hour, mom wanted me to ask if you invited Rafe,” he peers around you, gaze moving to behind your shoulder. “Or I could just ask him myself. Sup, Rafe?”

“Shut the fuck up, Dyl,” you whisper-shout. “Where are mom and dad? Can he sneak out the back? And don’t lie to me, or I’ll tell them about Hilton Head.”

“God, calm down. Dad’s in the garage and mom’s getting ready. Just have him go now.”

“Thanks,” you say, all but slamming the door in his face. You turn around and press your back against the door, letting out a shaky breath.

The covers rustle, and Rafe springs out of your bed to gather his things while Wilbur watches him. He always starts pouting when he notices that Rafe is putting on his hat or shoes, signs that he’s about to leave.

“We are so dead.”

“You don’t think he’ll say anything, do you? I don’t think I can sit at brunch with your dad in an hour if he knows I slept in your bed last night.”

“Not if he’s smart,” you sigh. “Want me to walk you out?”

“No, I got it. Just keep Willy in here. I’ll text you when I make it out alive. If you don’t hear from me, just assume your father murdered me,” he jokes, leaning down to give you a kiss after he slips his shoes on. “See you back here in an hour?”

“Yes, please be early. And clean shaven.”

“Yes ma’am. And don’t insult me,” he mumbles against your lips.

“Nervous?”

“Not nearly as nervous as I will be if I get caught, sweetheart. Gotta go so I have time to shower—and shave. See you in a bit.”

He gives you one last kiss before he departs, and you move to the window with Wilbur to watch him slink across the backyard, arms crossed and a fond grin on your face. He turns and blows you one last kiss before he disappears around the side of your house.

—

“Y/n, can I speak to you for a second?”

Your dad’s voice comes from his study as you pass by, checking yourself over in the entryway mirror one more time. Rafe should be here any minute.

“Yeah, what’s up?”

“Come sit,” he says, gesturing to one of the chairs in front of his desk. You feel the hair stand up on the back of your neck. Your dad only invited you to talk in his study if it was something serious. The last time he did was when he told you he was going to take away your Range Rover if you didn’t pull your Bs up to As your freshman year of college. You’ve had a 4.0 ever since.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yes, everything’s fine. Just wanted to talk about the new boyfriend.”

“What about him?”

“I always knew of him while the two of you were growing up. But I talked to him a bit back during Dylan’s grad week.”

As an unruly teenager and the rightful heir to his father's business, everyone in the Outer Banks knew about Rafe and his antics. Good or bad. You could even recall your mom gossiping to your dad, words passed on from Rose, about some of his more... notable incidences.

“Y-yeah, he's...” you trail off, searching for the right words to describe Rafe these days.

“Seems like a good kid,” your dad supplies.

“What did you guys talk about?”

“Business, mostly. His future and whatnot.”

“Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?”

“No, I just wonder... are you sure about this one? When you were kids, that boy was always causing trouble. And you know your mother and I were always so proud of how you stayed in line.”

“I know,” you sigh. “But Rafe’s not a boy anymore. Just give him a chance.”

“I will,” your dad says, slapping his knees to stand up. “But I'm also gonna give him a hard time.”

“Dad, please.”

“It’s my job. Your mom gets to freak out about Dylan moving out, and I get to handle scaring every man who gets to look at you.”

The doorbell rings.

“Please. I am literally begging.”

Your dad draws a fake halo around his head, and you just roll your eyes.

The morning gets off to an even more embarrassing start as soon as Rafe crosses the threshold into your house. Wilbur jumps into his arms immediately, all ninety pounds of him, and your mom’s eyes widen.

“My goodness, he’s usually so hesitant around strangers!”

Dylan chokes on a laugh, and if you weren’t across the room you’d have elbowed him in the ribs.

“Oh, I’ve walked Wilbur by Tanneyhill before.”

“Yeah, I-I love Willy. Mrs. Y/l/n, it’s so nice to see you again,” Rafe says, effortlessly following your lead after Wilbur scampers out of his hold. He shakes your mom’s hand politely. Your dad sidles up to her then, fixing Rafe with a stare harder than you’d prefer. “Mr. Y/l/n, you as well. Thanks again, to both of you, for inviting me.”

“Good to see you, Rafe,” your dad says, a strong hand clamping onto his shoulder. “Dylan, come say hi.”

Dylan’s grin is devilish, and you're just watching on in pure horror at this point. “How have you been, Rafe? Haven’t seen you in a while.”

—

Rafe’s grinning ear to ear, hand firm on your thigh, all of the windows in his truck rolled down. He even popped the sun roof, letting you blast your playlist all the way down the road.

“Okay—I just... did that go well?”

“You did great, Rafe.”

Despite Dylan's best efforts to embarrass you two, brunch had gone really well. Your dad took a second to let his guard down, unlike your mother who was immediately gushing over him. You could practically see the wheels in her head turning, the wedding colors she'd picked for you. And your dad came around quick enough once Rafe brought up Formula 1.

Your boyfriend looks so relieved, hand even coming to feel the air pass through his fingers as he hangs his arm out the window, hand on your thigh coming back up to steady the wheel. He taps on it excitedly.

“Lowkey, feel like I nailed it, baby.”

“Okay,” you giggle, leaning over to peck his check. You pull him in with a soft hand to the other side of his face. “Let’s not get too big for our britches.”

“Oh, I’m a parent-meeting expert now. Might go into consulting.”

“You’ve perfected the sport?” you joke.

“No, no. That’s—I’ve never actually met parents before,” he admits.

“No way?”

“Way? Have you?” he asks, slight edge seeping into his tone as he pulls up to the stoplight outside of your favorite coffee spot.

“Uh... once. We weren’t even really dating yet, but they came to visit and he like, ambushed me with them at dinner. They were kinda hippies, though.”

“Yeah?” His tone is clipped as he parks his truck.

“Yeah, some guy from my comparative literature class sophomore year,” you sigh. “But, you’re the first to meet my parents.”

“Mm,” he hums, fingers tapping on your knee. That satisfies him. He gathers one of your hands in his. “You coming in?”

“Will you just get me a latte? Kinda wanna call my mom and debrief.”

He laughs, kissing your knuckles. “I’ll give you a minute, sweetheart. Oat milk?”

—

Your original plans to meet the Camerons fell through, a last minute staging emergency arising when you were all supposed to go for dinner. You’d tried not to look down while Rafe attempted in earnest to cheer you up, telling you how pretty you looked while you took out your earrings and let your hair down. He'd kissed the crown of your hair and apologized profusely, promising they would love you when they finally got to meet you.

“M’not upset.”

“Okay.” His hand stroked your back through the thick cotton of one of his old water polo sweatshirts he’d let you borrow for the night.

“I’m just really nervous about meeting them. You might’ve set the bar a little too high with my parents.”

“You just have a great family.”

“I don’t know,” you said when you finally cracked a smile. “Made it pretty far on your first try.”

“Don’t worry. They’re going to love you, sweetheart.”

You let him kiss your cheek, your forehead, your nose and chin.

“Hope so.”

“Know so.”

And Rafe had somehow convinced your father to let you go to Midsummers with his family, promising to join up for pictures and greetings later. Your dad had willingly let him, to your surprise.

The event was a big deal to Figure 8 patriarchs and matriarchs alike, always trying to outdo the other in every way, all while feigning some sense of island camaraderie. But when Rafe had set aside time at brunch to specifically ask your family for their permission to accompany you to the event, they’d been hard pressed to say no. Your family immediately accepted Rafe as your boyfriend, any lingering hesitations about his character drowned out by the equal chances of your personal happiness and the heightening of their social and business profiles.

But he’d still come to your house to pick you up, ready to greet your parents in the foyer once again.

He takes one look at you in that blush pink dress, hair, makeup and jewelry all done up this time around, daisy flower crown in place, and flicks his eyes around his surroundings. Your father and Dylan were nowhere in sight, and your mother was busy fixing her earrings in the hall. He takes to your side immediately, a kiss to the side of your head followed by his lips pressing against your ear. “I’m fucking obsessed with you.”

With the high from those words, you ride in his truck to Midsummers, nerves never dissipating no matter how many reassurances he speaks across the summer air streaming in through the vehicle. “Remember, they’re gonna love you.”

He helps you down from his truck so you can focus on keeping your dress off the ground, assuring you for the fiftieth time that Rose is going to like your headpiece.

“Miss Y/l/n, how lovely to see you again you at last,” Ward sighs, sounding somewhat fond. “Rafe’s been talking my ear off about this, meeting you again even though we’ve already met. Sorry we couldn’t make it work earlier.”

“No worries, Mr. Cameron. Thank you so much for inviting me to tag along with your family at Midsummers. You as well, Mrs. Cameron. You look beautiful.”

“Thank you! And of course,” Rose says, bringing you in for a hug, one you definitely were not expecting.“You’re out in California, aren’t you?”

“Yes, home for the summer.”

“That’s a long way from here,” Ward says. His eyes flicker to Rafe. “Long way from Georgia. Shorter, but still a long way.”

“Dad, c’mon,” Rafe cuts in, and you can feel his hand gripping the back of your dress:

“He’s just stating the obvious, Rafe,” Rose intervenes.

“Yeah, it is far,” you agree. Rafe’s head whips around back to you.

“We’re figuring it out,” he says. To anyone else in the vicinity, he probably sounds confident and self assured. But you know Rafe, and you can look into his eyes and see that he’s not. That if he weren’t in front of his entire family, trying earnestly to impress his father, he’d have said: ‘we’re gonna figure it out, right?’

“I’m sure things will work out the way they’re meant to,” Ward says after a lapse in conversation. “One way or another.”

“Let’s get some photos so we can all enter and the two of you can run off,” Rose says immediately after, giving neither of you the time to say anything else.

You do your best to shake off Ward’s comment as the four of you join up with the Cameron daughters, plus Sarah’s boyfriend, John B. After posing for what felt like hours, the photographer asks you and John B to hop out so they can take some family pictures, the two of you swiping up a couple of Old Fashioneds from the bar. You have to assure Rafe twice that you’ll be okay for ten minutes on your own.

“First time meeting Ward?” Sarah’s boyfriend asks, leaned up against the bar like he owns the place.

“Er—of course not,” you say, like it’s obvious. But of course John B knew nothing about Figure 8 social circles. “Just the first time as Rafe’s girlfriend.”

“Yeah, you look nervous,” he admits, chuckling when your mouth drops open. “It’s not too obvious, I just know because—been in your shoes.”

You should be insulted that the teenager compares his and Sarah’s relationship with yours and Rafe’s, but you know he isn’t being malicious. You see nothing but kindness in his eyes. And it’s nice to have somewhat of a teammate in this situation, the two of you standing by while one of the most powerful families in Kildare poses together in their finest outfits.

Rafe looks hot in his grey suit, especially with the pocket square he’d agonized over for weeks before you gifted him one that was hand sewn from the extra material where your dress had been hemmed. Monogrammed, of course.

You’d decided to go with his initials, since it was going to him after all. But your stomach gets fluttery if you think about the expression on his face when he’d received it, telling you that you should’ve put yours on it instead. “That way everyone will know I’m yours.”

Turning back to John B, you can’t imagine how he must have felt the first time he was invited into all of this. It intimidated even you, and you’re pretty sure John B was friends with the boy who delivered your family’s groceries every week.

“Any tips?”

“You’re way better off than I was, first of all,” he laughs. “But he’s really only scary when it’s one-on-one. He cares too much about this appearance of a perfect family to make digs in front of an audience.”

You nod. “That’s actually really good advice, John B.”

“Don’t sound so surprised, kook.” He clinks his glass against yours, promptly throwing the entire drink back as you watch and laugh. “That’s another tip. Drink whenever you can.”

“I’m familiar with that one.”

It's intimidating entering the event, a little after everyone else has arrived. Rafe told you that was by design—the Camerons could never be earlier than fashionably late. You always assumed you and Rafe were raised with similar pedigrees, but you're barely through the doors of the event before you realize that's not entirely true. Up until the last millisecond, Rose is fussing with Sarah and Wheezie's gowns, the older daughter making eye contact with you and rolling her eyes at her step-mother's antics. And Ward brushes Rafe's shoulders off more times than you can count, straightening his bow tie for him repeatedly. Rafe just places his hand on your back, leaning down to whisper into your ear. “You ready?”

You smile up at him, but your nerves are firmly settled in at this point. What you reply isn’t completely true. “Of course.”

—

You take John B’s advice, of course, and choose Kelce as your designated drinking buddy for the night. He was hard to keep up with, but you threw your inhibitions to the wind after you got meeting the Camerons out of the way. Plus, Rafe had more business to attend to than he’d let on, and you were getting pretty bored. Not too long ago he would’ve been right beside the rest of you, causing trouble and borderline embarrassing all of your parents. It was weird to see him walking around, shaking hands and rubbing elbows. He’d invited you into a few conversations, you trying your hardest not to simply watch him in awe.

You’re engaged in some strange dance battle with Kelce when he stacks his drink into yours, both empties at this point. “Your turn to get a round.”

“Boo,” you sigh, throwing your head back. “What d’you want?”

“Surprise me.”

“Aye aye.”

You’re turning on a shaky high heel, and you have to give yourself a little mental pep talk to straighten up. Of course you can, though.

“What can I get you, miss?” the barkeep asks.

“Vodka press, Tito’s, and a Jack and coke. Double Jack. Actually—single. Thanks,” you murmur, trying to fish a ten out of your clutch.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got the tip for this one,” a voice says next to you. Ward Cameron is sidling up next to you, sliding a fifty across the counter. Your eyes widen at the tip, trying not to be embarrassed as the bartender sets the drinks down in front of you.

“Oh, thank you, Mr. Cameron.”

“Ah, call me Ward.” He flicks his eyes back to the bartender, who quickly pockets the tip and makes himself scarce to give the two of you some privacy. You can’t help but think of John B’s warning: ‘he’s really only scary when it’s one-on-one.’ There’s no point in even trying seek out Rafe, you knowing full well you’re expected to stay rooted to the spot until Ward dismisses you. “Having a good time?”

“Yeah,” you nod. “It’s always fun to come back out here for this.”

“So, California to Georgia,” he whistles. “That’s probably a five hour flight, at least.”

“Yeah, um,” you take a minute to make sure your flower crown is perfectly in place. “It’s actually two.”

“Excuse me?”

“Two flights. From his school to mine. Rafe checked, he said there’s nothing direct,” you clarify.

Ward let’s out an indifferent chuckle. “Of course he did.”

Your eyebrow furrows because you don’t know what to say, turning to look at where your drinks are starting to melt. Kelce would be wondering where you are by now if he wasn’t three sheets to the wind. And where the hell was Rafe?

“Y/n, as far as I can tell, you are a nice girl. I just need to make sure we’re on the same page about one thing.”

Your heartbeat that hadn’t really settled since Ward approached you is picking up again, and you really wish Rafe had been the least bit more concerned about where you were at this moment.

“Um, I-I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”

“I'm don’t know how serious you two are, Y/n, but I know my son. He's clearly very invested in pursuing you.”

Your resolve crumbles a little at that, your heart warming, thinking about Ward noticing something like that.

“But Rafe needs to be committed to finishing this degree so he can come home and start learning the ropes next year. And in four years, Sarah will do the same. Then Louisa after her.”

“Wow, that’s so lucky for you—that they all want to go into the family business,” you praise, not really knowing what else to say. It must be the wrong thing, because Ward just quirks an eyebrow.

“In this family, our business will always come first. Before anything and anyone else. Do you see what I’m getting at?”

You swallow, catching on to where this is going for the first time. You still go for playing dumb.

“Ward, I really don't think I understand.”

“But you do, don't you? You know Rafe. He’s a bit emotional, he’s a ‘feeler,’” Ward says sarcastically, putting it in air quotes. All of the niceties you experienced earlier when you first greeted Rafe’s family were long gone. You can only gather that it was all an act for Rafe’s benefit. But you know the only option is to sit there and take it. “He thinks with his heart, never enough with his head. Sarah, for example—when it’s time for her to cut that pogue lose, which it will be soon enough, I know she will. Whether it’s my decision or her’s. I can count on that, because she’s just like me in that respect; she knows we have to make sacrifices. But Rafe—I don’t think I can make that same assumption about him.”

“Ward, with all due respect, Rafe is really focused on the business.”

“You're correct, and I’ve worked hard to get him there. Which is why I can't have him spending his senior year of college, when he should be buckled down, traveling back and forth from California and getting distracted from his future by some girl.”

“Mr. Cameron, I would never—”

“You know that it’s true. I can tell you’re bright. You come from a great family.” It’s a compliment and an insult all at once. He likes you because of your father’s business and your mother’s social status, not because of what you do for Rafe, or what you have to show for yourself. He continues like it was nothing but the highest praise. “But right now, you are across the country from him, and I can bet he’s determined to make that work, no matter what it takes. Which I obviously can’t have,” Ward sighs. “It’s just not the right time. You can understand that, can't you?”

You nod numbly and pick up your drinks, hoping he’ll get the signal to wrap this up soon. You’re at the point where you can’t listen to this anymore, liquid courage re-flooding your veins.

“I’m not asking you to stay away from him, because you’re both adults,” Ward says, stopping you with a hand on your shoulder. “But I’m asking you to think long and hard about what’s best for the both of you. Rafe already knows what’s expected of him. He’s always known.”

You look back towards the crowd under the gazebo, able to make out John B of all people. He sees you talking to Ward, shooting you the most subtle thumbs up he can muster. He has no idea. You don’t take the chance to nod at him, turning back to the bar.

“Say the two of you let it go for the school year,” Ward bulldozes, taking a step closer to you. “And you end up back here too, great. But even then Rafe’s going to be working all the time, the longest hours he ever will in his life. For the next few years, Y/n. You’re so young—are you really going to tie yourself down to a commitment like that? What about your future?”

In a tone you hope comes across as confident, you say, “I really appreciate your concern, Ward.”

Ward's perfectly white teeth are pulling into an even more perfect grin, and the sight makes you sick.

“Great. I'm glad we had this talk.” He pats you on the back, leaving first before you get the chance to.

You just shuffle through the crowd numbly, not even reacting when someone steps on your toe, taking it all in stride as you seek the comfort of your friends once again.

You were foolish to think Ward would warm up to you immediately, or at all. You had been way too confident in yourself, especially after witnessing the wear working for his father had on Rafe. ‘He’s not an easy man to please.’ How could you be so naive, thinking you could coast by on your charm?

You’re a few feet away when you notice that Topper had joined up with Kelce again, as had your boyfriend. He’s joking with them, amused at the way Topper is clearly almost done tolerating Kelce’s drunken antics, but you stand and watch for a bit as he scans the crowd, gaze flickering toward the bar you’d just been at. You realize he’s looking for you when he finally spots you, his face relaxing as the two of you make eye contact.

“There you are.” He pulls you in close, kissing your forehead. You want to cry. “Where’d you run off to? One of those for me?”

He’s gesturing to the drinks you’re holding, reaching for the darker of the two. But Kelce is swooping in, snatching it out of your hold quickly. “Nope,” he pops the ‘p.’ “This one’s all mine. Sorry Cameron. Thanks Y/n/n.”

Rafe just rolls his eyes at the two of you, eyes lingering on your face when he notices your fallen expression. He sets your other drink down on the high top table you’re all standing next to, pulling you in by your hips. “You okay?”

If you had a choice right now, about how to proceed with telling or not telling Rafe about what had just happened, your instincts compel you to bypass the decision process altogether; you paint a careful smile on your face, shaking your head slightly. “Yeah, all good. Just zoned out for a sec.”

He isn’t convinced. “Tired?”

“Maybe a little. Kinda drunk. Are we leaving soon?” you ask, melting into him. It’s a lot easier to handle his tone of voice when you don’t have to look him directly in the eye.

“I vote yes,” Topper says, gesturing towards Kelce, who is somehow sucking down his new drink at an alarming pace while continuing to dance to the oldies tunes they play at these things. “Like, right now. Rafe, you’re hanging back right?”

You look back up at your boyfriend in confusion. “You’re not coming with us?”

He bite his lip in contemplation, looking around the party. The twinkly lights reflect off of his pupils, making him look starry-eyed as he surveys the crowd. A sea of opportunities to prove himself to his father. Rafe looks resolved when he turns back to you.

“Well... I was gonna stay, wrap up some stuff,” he explains. His eyes flicker across your face, still not pleased with your expression. “But that’s okay, I’m good to go now.”

“No, Rafe,” you say immediately. You take a deep breath, rolling back your shoulders and painting on a smile that comes easily with years of experience at parties like this. “Stay, I’ll go ahead. How long will you be?”

“An hour, tops. Will you take her?” Rafe looks hesitant, still taking your green light anyway, already slowly extracting himself from your hold, Topper rolling his eyes but nodding and beginning to corral Kelce toward the exit.

“I can’t believe you’re making me babysit two of them.”

“Don’t let her drink too much.”

“Hey,” you protest, pushing him in his chest half heartedly. The push barely does anything, only proving your impaired motor skills further. Or that you're dating a tree. “What are you, a cop?”

“I’m your boyfriend, actually.”

“Really? When did that happen?” you decide to play along, picking up your drink again.

“‘Bout a month ago, Y/l/n,” he says softly. He can see right through you, can tell you're putting on a show for all of your friends but you're still not okay. You have to break eye contact.

“Hmm, for some reason I thought you were just this guy from middle school.”

“At least this time nobody spilled on your dress,” he teases half-heartedly, and the memory only hurts you more. “Not sure I’d wanna sacrifice this one.”

“Can you—you guys are the worst. Focus. We need to go now, before Kelce gets his entire family blacklisted from the club. You coming or not, Y/n/n?” Topper begs.

You’re nodding, leaning up to give Rafe one last kiss before you leave. He holds you close to him with a firm hand on your back, voice dropping to a whisper right next to your ear. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

The lump in your throat is growing, but you push through, lowering yourself back down to your feet as soon as you can. “Yeah, don’t worry about it. Focus on the rest of your night.”

Rafe still looks unsure, his hand resting on the nape of your neck as he kisses your forehead. “Y/n—”

“We’ll talk about it later, okay?” you finally admit. Rafe nods curtly, can tell you’re not going to let him leave with you right now. But he doesn’t know why. He doesn’t know that if you pull him away from his responsibilities right after that talk you had with Ward, it’s going to spell disaster for the two of you.

“Just some business stuff, alright?” he assures you. “I’ll see you soon. Forty-five minutes.”

“Promise?” you murmur, fiddling with his pocket square. He smiles down at you, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

“Promise. You look so pretty. Half an hour. Now go.”

Topper’s guiding you towards the parking lot with a polite hand on your back, but you have to watch Rafe as you leave. You watch him approach his dad, who gives him a smile and a pat on the back. Rafe preens under his gaze.

But Ward must have been watching you two from afar because his gaze is flickering back to you, and he fixes you with a hard stare. He raises his eyebrows, bringing his drink to his lips. Taking a leisurely sip, hint of a smirk on his face. You can practically hear his thoughts: ‘Rafe chose to stay here with me, with the business, and sent you off with his friends.’ It’s everything in you to not let the tears that have been building on your waterline spill over. But your friend isn’t easily fooled.

“Y’alright, Y/n?” Topper says from beside you, trusting Kelce enough to walk on his own as you all near the parking lot. He moves to follow your gaze but you stop him, quickening your pace towards his gray Jeep. “Did something happen?”

“Ward Cameron happened.”

———

tags: @moniamaybank @downbytheouterbanks @littlementalpolaroids