#i already had to cut this post down because i knew it'd be best to save what i was writing for the next post

[byemambo]

Love in the Big City: Navigation with a Faulty Compass [PT.1]

The last #mambo.speaks post I've written was about Monster Next Door, which you can find here and here. I binged the entire Love in the Big City season the night it was released, and boy oh boy do I have so many things on my mind since then. Since I feel like each theme I'd like to cover is influential of one another and not specific to each episode, I'll be dividing up my posts by topic and referring to the episodes as so.

For starters: LITBC is not just your average BL series with vague descriptors and tropes. It encapsulates many moments of our youth that undergo major transformations, from finding your path in your early 20s, dealing with past traumas and experiences from childhood and adolescence, the process of growing and shedding your own skin, and learning what it means to walk through the world with an open mind and open heart. This is why I'm thoroughly impressed with Nam Yoon Su's performance as Go Yeong, a 20-something closeted gay man living in South Korea and experiencing the world through the lenses of a queer individual in a conservative society that is built upon fear through misogynistic and homophobic views. In some people's eyes, this is the story of a young man paving his way through his romantic relationships and dealing with their individual challenges, some decisions being self sabotaging and others unfair and horrific. However, the main theme I noticed in Go Yeong, because I resonate with such similar stories and experiences: navigating the world with a faulty moral compass and dealing with its consequences and shortly after, transformative lessons.

Since there are many spoilers in these posts, everything will be under the cut!

Go Yeong's First Scene: Time is of the Essence

In the first few scenes, we're introduced to Go Yeong: a rambunctious free spirit who speaks his mind and sticks to his values, especially when it concerns the disrespect of others. With having such a strong personality, many of us must learn self regulation in order to keep ourselves out of trouble, as conflict can steer us in a direction we have no business participating in. I felt like this line from his hookup/situationship firmly sums up Go Yeong's character when we first meet him: someone who calls things for what they are, but at the cost of him carrying his heart on his sleeve and for others to "see right through him" Go Yeong is an open book, not leaving much room for people to understand his more complex side and therefore, becoming an easy target for public scrutiny and criticism. After all, having no attachment to your reputation and image means that there's no need to invest too much of yourself in others, especially when you're met with a reality outside of your expectations.

Episode 1

Once he meets Nam Gyu, a person rigid and particular in his values and character, Go Yeong is met with an important lesson:

"Whatever the reason may be, being late is absolutely unacceptable. Time is gold."

At first, Go Yeong is dismissive of such a stingy mindset, given that it's almost completely opposite to how Go Yeong currently leads his life: now and not now. He confronts his absentmindedness, but is admittedly saved by his natural charisma and charm, something that he can't easily shake off and continues to attract the attention of others, including those that do not have his best interest in mind.

Episode 1

Traveling to the place he's most familiar with and can truly be his authentic self, Go Yeong runs into Nam Gyu, having a conversation and sharing intimacy out in public until he notices Mi Ae, a classmate who he now worries about her leverage in revealing vulnerable information about his sexuality if she so desires. However, during Nam Gyu's exchange, I found it interesting how in small moments, we can see the push back both people have towards their natural selves: Go Yeong's apprehensiveness towards Nam Gyu's peculiar ways, Nam Gyu assuming Go Yeong's enthusiasm and playfulness as drunkenness and unserious. I feel like so many of us, especially those who have difficulty finding love, cling onto chances to share such a deep and meaningful connection with others, undermining all of the small red flags and deal breakers in our faces at the beginning. This is a moment in Go Yeong's youth where he's still learning more about himself, but moreso about how he chooses to navigate his love life and what he's willing to accept and tolerate. This results in intimacy behind closed doors or only in the sight of other queer people just like him, but finding no luck as he's met with unfaithful or selfish individuals who will always choose themselves and their dignity rather than share responsibility for circumstances involving both parties. After all, it takes two to tango.

Episode 1

This resentment towards his failures in dating and relationships can become discouraging for many, increasing in difficulty as you carry more intersectional aspects of your character under your belt. Someone like Nam Gyu who appears straight passing in his mannerisms and how he presents himself for the public eye, this is something Go Yeong can only achieve with his outer appearance such as wearing more traditional masculine clothing and leaving his more feminine expression at home or at the gay club. He also keeps his ecstatic personality under wraps when he's around other straight people, and unfortunately, his passive nature lands him with people who begin testing the waters in openly expressing their bigotry with their peers, hoping that he'd be a bystander or even complicit to the same beliefs.

Episode 1

Unable to keep up with appearances, Go Yeong retaliates against his former friend group, which they immediately resent and abandoned him to his own devices. This feeling of social isolation can be frustrating, but for Go Yeong's case, his detached mentality saves him from a more grim reality: tolerating the bullshit that comes with bigots and bystanders. We get a deeper understanding of Go Yeong's lackluster nature outside of his night life with his other queer friends by looking into his childhood and upbringing (which will be discussed in a future post).

During his relationship with Nam Gyu, Go Yeong is met with the idea of "earnest love," to which Nam Gyu becomes a fool in love with Go Yeong despite their differences. However, these differences continue to drive a wedge between the two, causing damage on both ends due to inaccurate communication, abandonment of their true selves, and ignoring the fundamental differences that deem them incompatible due to the realities of their expectations. I'm sure in Go Yeong's eyes as he had rarely been spoon fed love in his life, this is love so it should be ok, right? He isn't doing anything necessarily wrong, so what good would be make to punish him for doing everything right? This becomes a common hardship to overcome: Learning how to love when you've never truly been loved before. And to truly love is the bravest thing anyone can do.

Episode 2

You were always a good person but I was a coward. I wanted to be loved by you but I wasn't brave enough to receive your love. I'm sorry. Next time, don't meet a coward like me. Meet someone who'll truly love you, someone good. Please.

I've always been a firm believer in the phrase: people accept the love they think they deserve. This also coincides with "hurt people hurt people." In this current moment of Go Yeong's youth, love is still foreign to him, a language that he lacks proficiency in. Sure, there are concepts of it in movies, books, and other forms of entertainment, but to see and experience it up close is a completely different ball game with unexpected challenges and plays people tend to keep behind closed doors. Moments in relationships where conflicts arise, where feelings are hurt, when exchanges are made that damages the strength of the relationship. What if my friends find him weird? Why does the word "splendid" annoy me so much? Why is he still the first person I call when I'm in a rut? Why am I so shameless?

With a weak sense of self and unfamiliarity in his own skin outside of his appeal towards others, Go Yeong holds onto a damaged image of himself that he currently refuses to let go. It's all he's ever known. From living life in survival mode (which is something I'm also actively unlearning as time progresses), to needing to one day surrender yourself to another person, to realizing that love is more complex than simply being in proximity and sharing each others' enthusiasm for liking one another, this all comes crashing down once Nam Gyu's death becomes know, and the reason for his death is revealed.

Learning early on that to maintain peace and order by capitalizing off of our anxiety and fears, it's our responsibility to control every moving part that could potentially steer us in the wrong direction. This is applicable to shrinking ourselves and only adhering to the transactions of others: money, sex, intoxicants, self worth, all things to strip of a person in order to uplift ourselves. What Go Yeong desired was to get away from Nam Gyu after the break up, what Nam Gyu desired was to remain with the "love of his life," even if that means ultimately giving up who he is. However, such obsession only drove him to the end of his life, which I'm sure for a period of time, Go Yeong took sole responsibility and blame for. That's simply the person Go Yeong had learned to become: absorb the pain, because any moment of happiness and bliss will soon be disrupted with chaos and instability.

Episode 2

In these moments, we learn that life is fleeting and that anything can happen in the blink of an eye. So we must learn to move through life with intention, with grace, with delicacy, with care. In moments of heated disagreements, exchange of words that serve as ammo with goals of achieving harm disturbing enough to scare someone into the opposite direction, most of us never learn to appreciate things until they're gone, until it's too late. Not for the faint hearted: sometimes those things become the people we were meant to love but didn't have the ability to. And unfortunately, time and death waits for no one, no matter who you are or what you've done. Rather than making assumptions based on your own preconceived notions and ignorance, learn to open our hearts and to learn how to interpret the way our loved ones love, before the reality of death reminds us of impermanence and what we once had.

[girl-failure]

Transwoman needs answers

this isnt an easy post to write and it's going to be full of info about me that's personal and embarassing but I am desperate for answers and assitance so please bear with me. Long story short, im almost 3 years hrt (may 19th will be exact) and it's like nothing has changed. More info under the cut.

I'm going to try and explain everything to the best of my memory, but exact dosages and stuff might be fuzzy and inexact. I began HRT on May 19th 2021, when I was 22. I took one and a half 2mg pills, twice (morning and night) daily. I took them sublingually. I was also prescribed Spironolactone, though the exact dose escapes me (i remember it was 1 pill nightly). I had only come out as trans in the December the previous year, so i considered myself unfathomably lucky to get to start so soon. I had done this through informed consent at a planned parenthood and was excited by the possibility of a future where my own body didn't make me want to die. The idea of changing my body gave me a feeling of control in my life that had been entirely absent until that point. I knew I wanted all the help I could get with breast development (the women in my immediate family are well endowed) and I had read & heard from other trans women that prog could help, but I'd have to wait to ask for it.

I think it was on December 15, 2021, I was officially prescribed 100 progesterone nightly. At this point I had began to notice softer skin, lighter hair, the few bits of acne left over from high school had gone entirely, and the inklings of breasts beginning to form. My libido had all but dissipated entirely at that point, but I was told (mostly by other trans women) it would come back, especially after starting prog, and that my body would likely experience pleasure differently, and that my orgasm would be very different. The fat from my stomach (i wasn't overweight or underweight, i was pretty average for a man my height, but I did have a masculine stomach I despised) hadn't relocated at all, but I knew HRT wasn't a sprint, but a marathon, and I had a long way to go. This continued for a long time, eventually i would be bumped up to two 2mg of E (sublingual pill) twice daily (8mg total), and my Spiro would change to 200mg a day EDIT: My Spiro dosages did fluctuate, though again I don't recall the exact dosages, (I initially got it confused with my prog dosage, sorry), though there was the occasional few week period where I'd be bumped back down to one and a half E pills because I had timed my blood-work poorly. It had been a while since starting HRT and I was starting to worry. My libido never came back, I was unable to feel the sensation of pleasure entirely, my breasts & nipples never became sensitive or had growth pains, and my breasts really hadn't grown at all. My stomach still made me feel awful and masculine because fat continued to pile up there instead of in the feminine places I was told and led to believe it should!!! I was scared and frightened and upset. I'd say I developed an eating disorder but my eating was already disordered. I was afraid of food. Afraid it'd just make me look manly, instead of going to my hips/waist/whatever and breasts like it was supposed to. I began to feel like the hrt that was supposed to save my life was just making me feel worse.

On October 23rd, 2023, I finally started seeing a doctor again after 9 years of not being able to afford it, and only then because a parent got insurance through their work. I was officially prescribed Estradiol Valerate (.3mL intramuscular, and the bottle itself is 20mg/mL) , and quit Spiro outright. Now that I was talking to a doc, especially one who had been working with trans people in my area for years, I was starting to have hope again that maybe injections would solve my problems. After all, they're supposed to be more powerful right? Well after some blood-work revealing that my T levels were so low they were undetectable, we started fiddling with my injection dosages. I went down to .25mL. Nothing changed. I went down to .2ml. Nothing changed. I stayed at .2mL and was prescribed a med called EstraTest (.625mg E and 1.25mg T), a single pill which has both E and T in it, to try and raise my T levels back to measurable levels and hopefully find that golden ratio of E and T where maybe my body will start working again and start changing. But that brings us today. I still don't feel any sensation of pleasure (masturbating is pointless, intimacy just feels like I'm disappointing my partner), let alone a female orgasm (which as embarrassing as it is to admit, I was really looking forward to), my nipples still don't get sensitive and my chest doesn't get sore or get growing pains. My breasts look the same way they did 4 months into hrt. I've still had practically no fat redistribution, though I've gotten better about eating and not being afraid of food. I'm even beginning to notice my acne slowing starting to come back. I feel like I'm losing my mind. Why has nothing worked? Why does it feel like I'm regressing? I lost my health insurance earlier this week, and I can't afford to see my doctor again with my dumb pizza delivery job, so I haven't been able to ask to try anything more drastic to try and fix these issues. My current theories are that maybe my body is just more resistant to E? Which would be awful, but might be handled by just tripling my dose or something? Or

that my receptors are fried, and that the only solution would be to stop taking my HRT for a while (maybe even a long while). I pray that isn't the case, because I'd sooner off myself then let my body regress any further.

So this is a call for help. If anyone has any idea what could be causing these problems for me, or knows how I might be able to fix them, PLEASE let me know. I've lost hope in having a future as a woman, or even just feeling apathy towards my body (instead of intense self-loathing) at this point.

Here's my ca$happ if anyone wants to throw some money my way and maybe I'll be able to see the doctor again. cash.app/$occultChloe

[victoria-vd]

OFFSCREEN POST

The Storm

// tw violence, injury, eye gore (kiiinda? almost)

Part 1: The Calm

The hallways of Naranja-Uva Academy were uncharacteristically quiet. Not many students roamed the school on the weekend, preferring to either stay cooped up inside their dorm or return home, leading to eerily silent corridors and barren dormitory halls.

The silence only made the sounds of destruction coming from Victoria’s dorm that much more pressing.

A girl with long white hair stood before her neighbor’s door with her phone in hand and a Maschiff by her side. Esper stared down at the screen before turning her gaze upward to the door before her, a sense of dread creeping up her spine. She’d already texted Jaime about the situation and had been instructed to wait, but frankly she was almost tempted to knock on the door right then and th—

Quick as lightning, an object suddenly whizzed past her ear, snapping her out of her thoughts. The girl glanced over her shoulder, looking to see what the object was.

To her horror, lodged deep into the brick wall behind her was a plastic straw.

Esper swallowed down the lump in her throat as she whipped back around to find where it came from, taking notice of a small hole in Victoria’s wall. Sure enough, it was about the width of a plastic straw.

Her grip on her cane tightened as she looked down at the Maschiff by her side with a grimace. It'd be best to wait…

It wasn’t long before frantic footsteps approached Esper. A tall boy skidded to a halt beside her, holding his hat to prevent it from flying off. Out of breath, Jaime’s eyes glanced over to the straw lodged firmly into the wall. With a wince, he turned to the girl and asked, “What… What’s going on?”

Esper gave an unsure shrug as she gestured aimlessly at Victoria’s door, "I don't– I don't know... Something’s going on in there. I hear crashing, things breaking, it sounds like– like a fight or something. I don't... I don't know what's happening. But it doesn't sound good…"

Jaime drew his lips into a line, clear worry seeping into his expression. “And she didn’t answer your texts?”

The girl shook her head with a frown, "She didn't, which is incredibly unusual because she typically answers damn near instantly after I've sent them."

The boy silently looked between Esper and the door, a mix of emotions clear on his face. Shutting his eyes for a moment, he drew in a breath and made his way towards the door, raising a hand to knock.

But something sparked in Esper's eyes— a sharp pang shot through her neck. Jaime should not touch that door. Before she even knew what she was doing, she forcibly grabbed Jaime by the forearm and yanked him away from the door. "Wait–”

“Wh—“

BANG!

The wooden door suddenly burst outwards with explosive force, snapping it in half and sending it careening into the wall at breakneck speed. The wood shattered into splinters on impact.

The pair loudly yelped in unison. Jaime recoiled back in shock, holding Esper by the shoulder and pulling her back slightly as Esper’s Maschiff scrambled back with the pair, her tail between her legs. The girl stared at the remains of the door, her breath quick in her chest, before looking off towards the now open doorway. "What– What… the fuck…?"

A door down the hall slammed open followed by a rather upset looking Maple sticking her head out of the doorway, “CAN YOU PEOPLE KEEP THIS SHIT DOWN!? SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO FUCKING STUD–” Maple cut himself off, eyeing the scene down the hall with a confused expression, “Oh what the fuck?" She ducked back into her dorm for a moment before hurrying out into the hall as she struggled to fix her belt. "I thought someone was battling in the dorms! What the fuck happened?"

"Uhhh–" Esper looked to Jaime for help.

He was about to respond when another door in the opposite direction opened as well, which Aspen carefully poked his head out of. The boy opened his mouth to say something, before closing it as his eyes fell on the debris of the destroyed door. He stepped out into the hall to join the others, a tentative expression on his face as he came closer. “Um,” he paused for a moment, looking between Esper, Jaime, and Maple, “What’s going on?”

It was at that moment that Victoria’s Indeedee burst out of the doorway with a shaken-up Espurr cradled in her arms. Upon seeing Jaime, she visibly relaxed and rushed to him.

The boy in question bent down and grasped the goat by the shoulders. “¡María, ¿qué pasa?!”

The Indeedee cast a glance at the open doorway behind her. Her eyes fell to the Espurr in her arms, which she then held even closer to her chest, before looking back up to meet Jaime’s gaze. She reached a single hoofed hand to Jaime’s own hand on her shoulder and pressed down on it.

His eyes darted back and forth between the hoof on his hand and the open doorway, brows wrinkling upwards with each passing moment. He swallowed nervously and stood back up, reaching for a Pokeball at his side and releasing the Pokémon inside. Another Indeedee— a male this time— appeared before him, arms to his back and his posture stiff as a board. He glanced at his surroundings, taking note of the shattered door and Maria’s shaken state, and immediately looked up to his trainer with a nod.

Jaime nodded back and turned to Maria. "Quédate con la Espurr". He looked down at Jorge, and then from Esper to Aspen to Maple. “Psychic outburst.”

"Oh!" Maple’s eyes wandered the group, only to fill with fear when they landed on the Maschiff. "Well in that case..." She looked away from the group and backed up slowly, shooting Jaime an awkward smile and thumbs up. "Bye! Have fun!"

Esper raised a brow at Maple's reaction but decided not to dwell on it, it was their choice to not get involved after all. And Esper was about to make her own. The girl took a deep breath, attempting to steel her nerves, and promptly turned away from the group and began to walk toward the doorway of Victoria’s dorm.

“"Wait–! What the fuck are you doing!?” Maple stopped in her tracks and whirled around to stare in horror at Esper. “I know you don't know exactly what we're dealing with here but you SHOULD NOT WALK INTO THAT FUCKING DORM!?"

“Woahwoahwoahwoah—” Jaime leapt in front of Esper and pulled her aside. “Look, I love the enthusiasm, but you can’t just walk in without warning. You need some sort of protection,” he said as he gestured to Jorge. “There will be shit flying at speeds that will kill you on impact and, psychic or not, we will not be able to catch them.”

Aspen took a breath, "Okay, okay. Can we get more words other than like– just 'psychic outburst'?"

“I’d love to give you an in-depth explanation but we don’t have time to—”

"Autism." Maple interrupted.

“I—“ Jaime pointed a finger in the air, “Yeah, pretty much. Just imagine autism but with superpowers.”

"Okay, great," Esper replied as she balled her Maschiff, figuring it’d be safer for her Pokemon to be put away, before gesturing towards the doorway, "Can we go check on Tori now or...? Because if you lot aren't coming I'm just going to walk on in."

Jaime swallowed, “Yes but—“

From where the group was standing at the doorway, they could see the figure of a Hatterene being thrown against the counter of the mini-kitchen of the dorm, sliding over the top and hiding behind it just in time to avoid being hit by a flying microwave that crumpled against the wall. The Hatterene briefly glanced at the metal heap on the floor before leaping back over the counter and out of the line of sight of the doorway.

“…You are absolutely staying behind me, Esper.” Jorge stepped forwards to stand by Esper’s side.

The girl nodded, staring wide-eyed at the crumpled microwave, "No argument there..."

Maple fumbled with the Pokeballs on his belt. "Oh. Yay...." Aspen's hand went toward an older Net Ball on his own belt, his lips pursed. Neither of them wanted to fight a Hatterene.

Jaime visibly swallowed and took a deep breath, steeling his nerves. He stepped forwards into the room.

The bizarre effects of Trick Room became immediately apparent. The walls of the dorm were lined with translucent square tiles that glowed an iridescent blue, and every step felt prolonged and sluggish. Potted plants and kitchen utensils floated alongside the group as they crept through the entryway corridor. The door to the bathroom had been busted halfway off its hinges, allowing them to glimpse inside and see the light bulbs shattered, the mirror cracked, and the sink faucet burst, spewing water everywhere.

Jaime stopped right at the corner of the corridor, holding his hand up to signal for the rest to stop as well. Leaning flush against the wall, he slowly peeked his head around the edge of the wall to get a look around the corner—

A red hand suddenly caught a spoon that almost flew straight into Jaime’s eye socket.

Victoria’s Armarouge, Matador, rounded the corner with surprising speed, pulling Jaime back around the bend into safety. He glanced over his shoulder at the chaos for a moment before facing the tall boy once again, crossing his arms with a stern look on his face.

"Guys, I think we might be, like, fucked." Maple ran her thumb over the button of Pickle's pokeball, but didn't press hard enough for the Meowscarada to be released. Trick Room shut down just about every single one of Maple's strategies.

Aspen nodded towards the Armarouge, but frowned as well, glancing around the dorm warily. "Yeah, no," he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, pushing the dyed section back, only for it to fall back into his face, "Between the Hatterene and Trick Room..." He trailed off, tapping his finger against the Net Ball in his hand.

Jaime cast a glance back at Maple and Aspen, then back to Matador.

The Armarouge gave Jaime a sympathetic look. He raised his chin in thought for a moment before snapping his fingers in revelation. Addressing the group, he made two fists and bumped them against each other, and then formed an X with his arms and shook his head. Then, he clasped his hands together and then drew them apart.

“So we don’t need to beat her,” Jaime tilted his head in thought, “We just need to separate them and hold her back.”

The white-haired girl nodded, "That makes sense, yeah... Though I don't think my Pokemon are well suited for that task. They aren't the strongest yet."

"There is still a Hatterene and Trick Room.” Maple interjected. “And between Aspen and I, we have a grand total of one Pokémon that isn't weak to Fairy."

Aspen mumbled, "We could try for Thunder Wave, but..."

Maple started to count on her fingers, muttering under her breath.

Esper squinted at Maple, "Now is not the time to be doing your bloody maths homework."

Aspen’s eyes widened slightly, "Wait, no, he's onto something–!"

"I'M NOT DOING MATHS HOMEWORK! I'VE FIGURED OUT HOW TO WIN!" Maple gripped Esper by the shoulders.

“Unhand me." Esper deadpanned.

Maple removed her hands and continued. "Listen, if we set things up right then my Meowscarada can be made SO SLOW that she outspeeds Barcelona under Trick Room!" She beamed with a smile only someone who has just cooked up the most insane battle strategy could have. "If Pickle gets paralyzed and has her speed lowered by at least one stage, something that Chip can do as Raichu has access to both Thunder Wave AND Electroweb, then all I would need to do is somehow procure an Iron Ball and–"

Jaime cut her off, “Maple, we outnumber her at least 3 to 1, we have the numbers over her– And where are you even going to get an Iron Ball from, out of your ass???”

"Well..." Aspen shook his head, "No, nevermind."

Maple visually deflated. "You all hate me."

Jaime rubbed the bridge of his nose. “No Maple, we don’t hate you, we just have more pressing matters than an Iron Ball. Can we please help my sister now?”

Aspen exhaled slightly, and nodded. "I still think we need some kind of plan though–we can all agree on that, yeah?"

"Well I MADE a plan and no one liked it, so I guess we're going to help Jaime's sister now!" Maple rolled up her sleeves as she walked out into the open dorm space. The second she was in the open space, Maple pulled a worn down Pokeball from her belt and launched it at the Hatterene. It flipped open as it soared through the air, sending the Meowscarada inside flying directly into Barcelona, Pickles claws digging into her hair.

Barcelona, who had been trying to get closer to Victoria when Pickle seemingly suddenly came out of nowhere, whirled around with a frustrated sound, swinging her hand-like tendril around to swat Pickle off.

“That works,” Jaime shrugged. He turned to Matador and shouted, “Cover me!” before dashing out into the open with the Armarouge close behind.

"Oh, we're just doing this now, okay–" Aspen mumbled, tossing the Net Ball into the air and letting his Alolan Raichu out as he followed after Jaime into the open space. The boy nodded to Chip, trusting that despite the increasingly sinister grin forming on his face, Chip would know what to do.

Out in the open space of the dorm, everyone had a much clearer view of the hell that had broken loose.

Floating in the center of the room, Victoria hung limp in the air with her arms draped at her sides. Swathes of debris wrapped around her like rings of an ophanim. Her blank white gaze, fully devoid of their piercing lavender pupils, lacked focus or direction. And yet it seemed as if she could see everything and everyone all at once.

Esper glanced around the corner, her eyes falling on Victoria with an expression of worry clear as day across her face. There wasn’t much the girl could do in this situation. She wasn’t a battler, she wouldn’t be able to take on Barcelona with the others.

The girl opted to stay hidden with Jorge for now.

Suddenly, Barcelona managed to grasp Pickle by the scruff of her neck and immediately swung around to throw her at Chip.

Chip attempted to surf out of Pickle's way; panic evident on his face when he realized he couldn’t move out of Pickle's trajectory fast enough before the two Pokemon collided with a screech; both taking the brunt of an Electro Ball attack the Alolan Raichu was preparing and sent the two in flying.

Aspen winced as he watched, "Shit– Chip?"

Chip growled as he floated up, starting to get irritated as he watched the Hatterene through narrowed eyes.

The Meowscarada landed on all fours with a hiss before standing back on her hind legs with a pleased mew.

Maple gave his cat a thumbs up–

– right as a Flower Trick bomb exploded from within Barcelona's hair.

The Hatterene let out a screech as she recoiled from the sudden Flower Trick. She whirled to the two Pokemon with a growl, looking back between them and Victoria at the center of the room. There was a moment of hesitation as she weighed her options. Dazzling Gleam would make this situation worse, Mystical Fire was too big of a risk to Victoria, and Psychic would not be of much help against a Meowscarada and an Alolan Raichu.

“Barcelona!” Jaime called out to her, slowly inching closer to Victoria. “You need to stop! You are making this worse!”

The Hatterene turned to Jaime with a look of contempt. She was trying to fix this. The boy was going to get himself killed.

Narrowing her eyes, she reached for the nearest floating object— a steel chair— and threw it at the two Pokémon as she tried to approach Victoria once again.

Pickle swiftly dodged the chair with Maple close behind, the two keeping their distance from the Hatterene.

Chip, on the other hand, growled at the enemy Pokemon, timing his reaction just so the chair narrowly missed him. He made a noise akin to a laugh, seeming to be taunting the Hatterene.

"Chip," Aspen warned, his eyes still trained on the Hatterene.

Unseen by the others, Esper began to creep out from the entrance way of the dorm, joining them all in the main room with Jaime’s Indeedee following close behind.

Aspen continued to eye the scene carefully, before glancing at Chip, barely nodding.

Now!

The chair began to rise from the ground, surrounded by a bright blue psychic energy. There was a dangerous spark in Chip's eyes as he snickered to himself, before launching the chair straight at Barcelona, the expression on his face one of pure glee at the thought of getting to throw a chair at the Hatterene.

The chair spun toward her at dangerous speeds, headed straight for the back of her hair-covered head until the handlike tendril suddenly shot outwards and snatched it out of the air and, in one swift motion, Barcelona spun around with the chair in her hands and swung it full-force into the figure directly behind her.

The figure went flying— swept off their feet by the sheer force of the chair against their upper body— and was sent straight into the brick wall behind them with a sickening crack. The figure didn’t stay against the wall for long though, instantly falling to the ground with a hard thud followed by the clattering of a cane beside them.

The figure– Esper Hargrove– did not get up. Instead she laid worryingly still on the floor of the dorm, the only sign of movement being the strained rise and fall of her chest.

The Hatterene froze, eyes wide and mouth agape. The steel chair clattered to the ground.

Jorge immediately rushed to Esper’s side with a bleat of extreme concern. Matador placed a hand over his mouth, staring at Barcelona in shock. Everyone in the room fell silent as all eyes fell to the Hatterene.

All at once, the flying debris in the room came to a sudden halt in mid-air, as if time itself had stopped. Victoria’s head snapped to look directly at Barcelona.

"Shit!" Maple scrambled over, sliding to the floor beside Esper and began to try and gently shake her awake. Once that didn’t work, he carefully moved her onto her side as he had determined she was out cold. "I think she's okay for now? Absolutely will need medical attention but I don't think she's at risk of dying immediately."

Barcelona slowly turned to look over at Victoria.

The silence in the room was suffocating; you could cut the tension with a knife. Nobody dared to move a muscle under Victoria’s terrifying blank stare.

Suddenly, every object in the room turned to point directly towards the Hatterene, poised and ready and waiting to pierce her into oblivion.

Jaime frantically threw his hands out at Victoria, “Victoria stop—!”

Victoria’s head snapped to look at her brother instead, and every potential projectile in the room followed.

His face paled and breath caught in his throat. But nevertheless, he swallowed and said, “Victoria… you need to calm down. I— I know that’s not exactly helpful but we— we need to get Esper medical attention, okay?”

"She's still breathing but she did get hit pretty hard so maybe we should... not violently maim everyone in the room?" Maple suggested.

Aspen paused. He looked at Esper, then the Hatterene, then Victoria, Jaime, Maple, and back to Victoria, before finally looking at Esper again. "Jaime's right– We shouldn't waste time, she needs medical care, now. I'm–" He paused, taking a deep breath, "I'm gonna call 112, yeah?"

Jaime nodded, running a stressed hand through his hair, “Yeah… yeah yeah.” He examined Esper on the ground, then surveyed the damage done to the room and the cuts and bruises that littered Victoria’s floating body. He winced. She was definitely going to need medical attention herself…

He tentatively addressed his sister, “Okay. We’re going to— We’re going to call an ambulance, alright? And we’re going to be here with Esper, but we’ll be quiet and give you space, okay? And whenever you’re ready, we can go to the hospital.”

Victoria simply stared at him.

"I will not be an annoyance for once in my life.” Maple stated. “I mean mostly because I'm trying to make sure Esper isn't dying but..." She looked away, continuing to make sure everything that's supposed to be inside, stays inside.

Aspen nodded tentatively, taking his phone out to call emergency services, glancing at Jaime with an attempt at a reassuring look as he stepped out into the corridor.

"Um– hello? Okay, um, I'm a Naranja-Uva student, we need an ambulance...."

———

[Jaime belongs to @jaimemes, Esper belongs to @espers-n-espurrs, Aspen belongs to @aspens-dragons, Maple belongs to @yveltalreal]

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Author Discussion: Show Your Hand

I had already been planning on having an Author Discussion for this part, and after seeing people's reaction to the preview, I went ahead and decided it'd be best to finish it before posting Part 2 of Show Your Hand lol. So, I'm putting the discussion below the cut to avoid spoilers for those who haven't read it yet! And thank you all for the love and care you've shown for Rinko. She'll be okay, I promise 💖

Read Another Level on AO3 :)

And read the installment this discussion is about: Show Your Hand

OKAY. So. I know everyone is gonna have a lot of thoughts after reading Show Your Hand, so I’m going ahead and writing this. I’ll try to keep this as succinct as possible. To do that, I’m going to break it into the following sections:

Rinko’s relationship with Yuzuki

Rinko’s relationship with Gojo

Rinko’s relationship with Yuzuki:

First of all, I didn’t intend for Show Your Hand to be a full installment, or even a full chapter to begin with. Originally, I had it as part of No Goodwill Here as a fragment in a second part for that installment.

But as I wrote and started following that little inspiration fairy, I found myself drawn back to the relationship between Rinko and her mother. And how that void that crops up every now and then opened for the very first time the day her mother died.

For the past six years, Rinko has been trying to understand where this void came from, and Show Your Hand is the first time she’s actively admitted to herself that she knows where it started. She’s always known.

In I Say ‘Sayonara’ Rinko felt like her mother’s last breath took part of her soul, and in a way she was right. Because it opened up that void in her chest that left her feeling hollow. This is why, in Hollow Echoes, she thinks the following:

The cold look in his eyes as he stared at her made her feel emptier than she would ever admit to him, or anyone else. Hell, part of her believed she’d just imagined the feeling because she and Shoko had been discussing her mother earlier that evening.

She wasn’t wrong. That feeling was partially there because they had discussed her mother. It made her feel more vulnerable and it made her doubt her gut. And, if you remember, the entire reason she even went into Gojo’s condo was because she doubted her gut and listened to Nanami instead.

This part was very important for Rinko’s character because she’s realizing more and more just how much like her mother she truly is, and how much her mother struggled. And she’s beginning to understand her mother so much more as well.

Her words to Mai, and how she interacts with the two girls, are like little mirrors of how her mother treated her. How Yuzuki would squeeze her forearm and how she would make her tea. Think back to Innate Issues when Rinko made Maki tea and squeezed her forearm when she set it down without even realizing what she was doing.

I don’t know the exact science of it, but it’s known that there are mannerisms and habits are essentially genetic. People who never met a certain relative will find out that they have the exact same habit or they literally spread their butter on a biscuit exactly the same. Weird things like that.

Rinko has Zenin traits like the scowl and the sneer that are just innate for the Zenin bloodline. It’s canon to me. No one will convince me otherwise. But she also has her mother’s kind smile and eyes. Her heart that chooses to look for the good in things just to keep from breaking in half.

Yuzuki knew the kind of person Naobito was from the moment he looked her in the eye and told her every moment with her had been a mistake. She knew that he was a man driven by a need for power, but primarily because it was all he knew. The Zenins are raised from birth to believe that the only important thing in life is strength, or at least, the perception of strength. You can’t just be strong, you have to seem strong.

Yuzuki knew that he wasn’t the man she fell in love with, especially after how he treated Rinko. And that was why she never faulted or scolded Rinko for being angry. 

She scolded Rinko when she allowed that anger to influence how she spoke to and treated others.

But she never told her not to be angry or that she had no right to be. And that is vital in how Rinko became the person she is. Because the only thing Yuzuki says against the anger, as a feeling, is: “...being angry does nothing but hurt me.”

She simply pointed out that holding onto the anger only hurt her in the end, not the one she was angry with. And Rinko said something very similar to Yaga about Yoshinobu. It’s because of Yuzuki and how she handled that anger, how she allowed Rinko to feel it and process it, that Rinko understands that many times, she just needs time to figure her thoughts and feelings out.

But the problem is that she doesn’t do that. She only gives herself enough time to know that she won’t explode and react solely out of anger, but she doesn’t process things. Not really. Because she doesn’t quite know how to do that alone. Not without her mother there helping her.

Rinko has not learned how to process grief without her mother there to help her through it.

She doesn’t understand how her mother was so strong to get through everything without breaking. Because she doesn’t realize that her mother didn’t get through things without breaking. Yuzuki broke the day Naobito broke her heart, and she forced herself to continue forward because she had a daughter to take care of.

Remember, Yuzuki died because she worked herself too hard when Rinko was young, and her body just started giving up. And she didn’t want that for her daughter. That’s why, one of the very last things she said to Rinko was “Just be happy, sweetheart.” Rinko doesn’t understand this yet. She still thinks her mother was some sort of superhuman who dealt with the anger and emotions with a smile and kept going. And that is incredibly vital for how she reacts to things.

Because Rinko doesn’t process things. She avoids them. Notice how in part 2, she begins thinking to herself that she doesn’t want to have the conversation, she just wants to sleep and then she thinks that maybe she can sleep for a few days because it’s not like she has anywhere to be. That is a dangerous path for Rinko to go down. And that’s why it’s important that she was stopped before she could follow it completely.

I’m going to tell you guys a little secret: Yuzuki died to make room for Gojo in Rinko’s life. Well, someone else in her life at least.

When Gojo showed up at her funeral, he unintentionally but willingly stepped into the space that was left behind. Yuzuki essentially gave him a look and said “here ya go, take care of my daughter” when he looked at her picture. And that’s why, when Rinko and Gojo aren’t doing well, that void is more evident to Rinko. But she doesn’t understand this yet. She only knows that void opened the day her mother died.

Right now, she’s still trying to close it by relying on her mother. In part 2, she even has the thought that maybe she’s dreaming and she’ll wake up and her mother is still there. Because for so long, her mother was all she had.

And that leads us into the next piece of this breakdown:

Rinko's relationship with Gojo

These two are messy. I’ve said this before, but neither of them is perfect. And Rinko is just as emotionally not okay as Gojo. But, they try to deal with things like adults, for the most part.

Many of you are likely upset that Gojo didn’t apologize, and that’s fair. But it’s a specific choice I’ve made for this because it fits his character. 

Gojo Satoru doesn’t apologize for his actions. He will admit he’s wrong, but he’ll then justify why he did what he did. The last time he apologized to someone for his own actions was when he told Amanai Riko that he was sorry he wasn’t more upset about her death.

Notice that he stops himself multiple times when they’re fighting because he realizes he’s wrong, and he admits to it. That in itself is already growth for him. Because he doesn’t admit that to other people. But we see him making a clear effort to be honest with her to make up for having lied to begin with, even if he doesn’t actually say the words ‘I’m sorry.’

Because, while him lying was the catalyst for Rinko breaking down, he was not the cause.

Rinko was overwhelmed by everything going on around her and how ashamed and angry she was that she was fired in front of her students. And that she was fired after Gojo was gone because Gakuganji is a coward. Gojo had to leave to talk to the higher-ups because Gakuganji had already informed them of what had happened to get rid of him. And Rinko knows this.

She’s upset with Gojo for lying, and she’s hurt that he chose to go to someone else to blow off steam when he could have with her. But she understands why he did it, because she knows she likely would have done the same damn thing. Rinko is not ready to commit to someone like that, even if she technically already has without realizing it.

So, let’s address this fight.

Yuuta was an unintentional catalyst to this because he’s just a sweet lil bean who misunderstood the situation. And neither Gojo nor Rinko blame him for that. Note that all Gojo said was that Yuuta is just so damn genuine and it made him worry that Rinko would take it seriously.

Gojo knows that he isn’t ready to commit. In fact, he still believes he’ll never be ready or able to commit to someone. And that is why he spooked. Because he doesn’t want Rinko to expect something of him that he is well aware he could never(he thinks) give to her. He didn’t realize that she was on the same page as him with that until they talked.

This part went through many iterations, one of them involving Rinko letting Yaga know that Gojo lied, but that doesn’t fit their relationship. Because neither of them likes involving other people because they both agree that it’s no one else’s damn business what they do with their lives.

Rinko doesn’t call Nanami because she doesn’t want him meddling and she knows that everyone else will likely do the same damn thing. Because they’ll ask why she isn’t talking to Gojo or what Gojo thinks about things, and she’s not going to involve them in that conflict.

Gojo does the same. Notice how, even when he was blowing her phone up, he didn’t involve anyone else. He didn’t call someone else to check on Rinko because he knows it’s none of their damn business if they’re not getting along. And that’s why when he thought she’d involved Yaga, he was angry. The anger left almost immediately once he realized she hadn’t.

Her wording was intentional on my part for two reasons: 1) when someone is upset, they aren’t thinking that hard about their word choice. 2) that misunderstanding fueled his fear for a moment that she was asking about him and expecting more from him by doing so.

Gojo wasn’t upset that she knew he lied. And while he struggled and was frustrated at being caught, he was willing to admit that he shouldn’t have once he realized she didn’t expect more from him.

Rinko’s breakdown was a result of many things, and he understood that he was just the trigger that allowed it to happen. And that’s why, while he didn’t apologize, he immediately admitted he was wrong once he knew she had calmed down.

These two are not dating. They’re not in a relationship, and that’s why it works. Because at the end of the day, it didn’t matter that he slept with someone else because they agree completely that they are not exclusive. They don’t care if either sleeps with someone else. They tease and they joke and she likes to rile him up by joking that someone made her cum harder than he did, but at the end of the day, the sex is just sex.

Does it look like a relationship? Absolutely. But the label is something they can’t handle and if they had that label, this would have likely ended things for them. Not having that pressure is why this still works.

I will give a small piece of information now: this is the last time Gojo sleeps with someone other than Rinko.

Rinko has already, without acknowledging it to herself, stopped sleeping with other people primarily because they’ve been seeing each other so much.

The resolution to this part was difficult for me to get to, but once I did, it felt right for the two of them to slip back into joking and teasing and for them to just be okay with each other because they trust the other to understand.

Of course Gojo would offer to make her cum to make up for it, and, honestly, Rinko is okay with that. Because again, they aren’t in a relationship. So him sleeping with someone else was never the issue, it was the lie. Now that they’ve worked through that, they can return to other problems, but for now, she just wants to turn her brain off and Gojo can absolutely help with that.

I know that this might not be the resolution some people wanted, but I felt it fit the best with who they are as characters and where they are emotionally.

I’ve had their end game mapped for a long time, and I’m confident in sticking to it because I genuinely feel it works the best. There will be ups and downs for these two, but at the end of the day, they’re both just messy lil humans who care about each other and have really good sex.

And they’re both okay with that because it’s what they both want.

[alectoperdita]

Winner Takes All

rated: E tags: established relationship, married couple, anal fingering, anal sex, bottom Kaiba Seto

Written for @joukaiweek day 3 prompt: winner takes all

Turns out that sometimes what you need to do is throw out the two hours of location research you tried to do and just write the loving married smut you wanted to. Maybe I'll go back and write the proceeding horse racing bits before posting to AO3. Or maybe I won't. So feel free to use your imagination re: Kaiba and Pegasus's frienemies relationship.

I consider this to be in the same universe as The Best Laid Plan. Mood for this piece? Slice of life when you're married to a high-powered tech CEO.

---

The journey to Las Vegas was long but uneventful. Seto dozed off in the passenger's seat about an hour in, and Katsuya left him alone. It was only fair when he had done the same this morning: slept through the first leg of their journey from San Francisco to LA while Seto drove. No doubt a day of interacting with Pegasus wore him out on top of that.

Katsuya made good time, though, letting his road trip playlist and the GPS guide him through long stretches of desert highway and finally the congested motorways snaking into the heart of the Strip. They even made their specified late check-in time with the hotel.

Seto was slow to rouse through the check-in process, requiring Katsuya to purposefully nudge him at several points because the arrangements were made under his name. Cute, even if it was a bit inconvenient. But through diligent study, Katsuya's English had improved tremendously over the last few years, which came in handy when he accompanied his husband on these trips. And he was able to lock down the details on both of their behalf.

He suspected the other man was already fully awake by the time they boarded the elevator to their top-floor suite. Instead of calling his husband on his ruse, though, he simply petted the head pillowed against him as they ascended. Clinging tighter to his waist, Seto made a faint but happy noise. With the elevator to themselves, Katsuya pressed a kiss to his husband's temple.

When the doors opened to their floor, Seto peeled away without prompting. Katsuya felt bereft, but he knew it'd only be for a brief moment. Until they traversed the hallway and were safely behind the closed door of their hotel room.

Seto waited for him to set their roller luggage aside, but not a second longer. His husband crowded him against a wall and seized him in a heated embrace and an even more fiery kiss. Katsuya slumped against the wall at his back, ceding control as Seto deepened the kiss into an open-mouthed one. There were no words to describe the joy and comfort of being crushed against his husband. To feel his strong hands and slender fingers explore his body and inflame his senses.

Seto broke the kiss first. "Finally, we're alone."

Katsuya chuckled and brushed a few bangs out of Seto's eyes. He couldn't resist pecking the tip of his husband's nose. Seto wrinkled it adorably, as Katsuya knew he would.

"Better enjoy it," he quipped. "Because in another two days—"

Seto's groan cut him off. "Yes, CES starts. I won't even have a moment to shit in peace then."

Laughter bubbled out of Katsuya. He never figured out if his own speech pattern had rubbed off on his husband or if Seto always possessed that crudeness, but hid it perfectly. He took Seto's hand, noting a light tremor before he stabilized, and led them to the couch. Seto didn't protest as he pulled him down, immediately winding his arms around Katsuya's neck and burying his face there. He further melted as Katsuya began rubbing that persistently troublesome spot at the top of his spine. There was, unsurprisingly, a knot there.

While he worked on the knot, he glanced around their suite. They were in the outer room meant for working or receiving visitors, furnished with sitting furniture and desks. The view outside the window was grandiose. It framed a large swath of the illuminated Strip. Through the open door on the other side of the room, he spotted the bedroom. It was likely only smaller than the current room by a small margin.

Everything was suitably high end. There was a certain quality of life expected of someone in Seto's position. Over the years, Katsuya had learned not to feel too guilty about it and to enjoy the ride when appropriate.

A flirty kiss against his throat tore him from his thoughts. He peered down and found his husband watching him with dark, half-lidded eyes.

"Thank you for coming with me. I know this isn't always the most riveting experience for you, but it means the world—"

Katsuya silenced him with a kiss in return. "I'm happy to go wherever, as long as it's with you."

Seto smirked. "Be careful what you say. I might test you against such a claim."

Katsuya swept his hand down the length of his husband's spine to brace his lower back. Next, he took hold of Seto's hip and pulled him entirely into his lap. Seto complied, but with a hint of a struggle because he could be a brat sometimes. Once he had him where he wanted, though, Katsuya burrowed his nose into his husband's hair and simply breathed.

"Nah, you could make spending time in even those horse paddocks fun."

A light slap landed across his shoulder. "Pervert."

"Hey hey now," Katsuya protested. "I didn't mean it like that. You're the one with his mind in the gutter."

Seto yanked his head back and arched a sardonic eyebrow at him. "Really? So you didn't have a single dirty thought at the track earlier?"

Katsuya flicked his eye toward the ceiling and noticed the chandelier overhead for the first time. "Well, I'm not gonna lie. There was that super swanky men's restroom with the mirror, and you always get so hot and bothered when we fuck in front of one."

"So romantic. Be still my beating heart," Seto deadpanned.

"Oh, as if you didn't want to jump me after my pick beat out Pegasus's on the track." He pinched his husband's flank for good measure. "You two are ridiculous, by the way. Twenty Gs and a five-year licensing deal. That was some rich bitch shenanigan. Jeez."

His husband rolled his eyes. "Pegasus wanted to agree. He just needed the pretense for his board. Can't be seen as a man who welches on his bets. It's bad for business."

"Rich bitch."

There was a growing predatory light in Seto's eyes. He slithered out of Katsuya's embrace and off his lap, ultimately landing on the floor at his feet. It always tilted Katsuya's world a little to see this gorgeous specimen of a man kneeling between his knees. His breathing hitched while his husband worked his belt and trousers open. Once freed, his cock swelled to fullness after a few expert strokes of his husband's hand.

Seto's voice dripped with seduction. "But I won't deny you were immensely helpful earlier. Would you like to collect your winnings now?"

He bucked against Seto's expert ministrations. Fuck, he loved this man. After licking his dry lips, he reached down and weaved his fingers into his husband's soft locks. "Yeah. And what would that be?" he asked breathlessly.

Seto's eyes glinted like gems. "The stakes were winner takes all. So you'll take me with your cock after I show you proper gratitude."

A groan tore out of Katsuya as Seto devoured him with his mouth. "Fuck, babe. Your mouth's to die for."

At his feet, his husband made a sound that seemed smug and felt like all bliss as it rumbled down his shaft. Despite gripping Seto's hair, the other man set the pace, leisurely suckling on his cock and rubbing the flat of his tongue against the underside. Seto struggled to take him into his throat, but Katsuya could hardly complain. His husband knew exactly what to do and how to work him to the edge.

"It's okay, babe." He reassured his husband with a soft tone and a gentler caress. "Don't force it. If you make me blow my load now, who's gonna fuck you until you scream your throat raw? God, I can't wait to take your tight ass."

Seto's patience must already be frayed. His husband snaked a hand between his legs to fondle his own erection. His eyes had grown watery, wetness threatening to break their corners, but they were no less intense or hungry. After another minute of vigorous sucking and hollowed cheeks that brought Katsuya to the brink despite his warnings, Seto finally released him.

His voice was hoarse as he ordered, "Get the lube."

Katsuya didn't need to be told twice. With his erect dick swinging in the breeze, he scrambled to their luggage and located the lube they brought for the trip. Seto was nearly naked when he returned. His trousers and underwear were discarded in a crumpled pile on the floor, along with his sports jacket and tie. He was halfway to shrugging off his unbuttoned linen shirt when Katsuya stopped him.

"Nah. Keep that on. You're super sexy that way."

Katsuya didn't bother disrobing. He knew Seto wouldn't have the patience to wait. Instead, he took a seat on the sofa and pulled his husband down into his lap where he belonged. Their stiff cocks bumped and rubbed against each other. A moan of pure need ripped from Seto's throat as he unconsciously started humping against Katsuya. While his husband did that, Katsuya slicked multiple fingers with lube before smearing the wet tips against Seto's pucker.

"Hurry up," Seto growled impatiently.

"Thought this was supposed to be my prize to enjoy. You're even more eager for this than I am," he teased.

When Seto opened his mouth to retort, that was when Katsuya breached his entrance. He panted, his eyes rolling back in his head as he rocked against the intrusion.

Katsuya continued, raining kisses across his husband's flushed cheeks. "Think we should redefine who's the winner here if you're doing all—" He thrust his finger in and out of the quivering hole. "The taking here."

Seto could only cling to him, writhing and keening as Katsuya worked him open with more and more fingers.

"I love how soft and syrupy your insides get for me," he muttered affectionately. It took a few tries, but finally, he jabbed his crooked fingers into the right spot that made Seto tighten and spasm in turns. "I'd be happy to just do this all night. Feel you come apart again and again. Give you all the mind-blowing orgasms you could want. You can switch off your brain while I take care of you."

By now, a sheen of sweat coated his husband's body, soaking into his shirt. He was flushed pink from head to toe. But the teeth came out as Seto snarled, "If you don't put your cock in me within the next thirty seconds, you'll sleep on this couch for the rest of the stay. Thirty. Twenty-nine."

"Not fair!" he protested, even as he extracted his fingers. "You're counting way too fast."

Seto dropped the count, but only because he shoved Katsuya flat against the sofa back and maneuvered into position to line them up. He never hesitated as he sank onto Katsuya's cock in one slow but unrelenting glide. They both swore, still caught off-guard by the sensation of their bodies locking together to this day. Seto was so very tight and hot around his dick. He felt like heaven.

"God, you're incredible," he groaned and settled his hands on his husband's sharp, jutting hip bones.

After a biting kiss, Seto settled on a savage pace. Katsuya was content to sit back and let his husband fuck him into the cushions. Often, Seto either tired himself out or the burning flames quenched into something sweeter but no less needy. He rubbed his thumbs along the crest of Seto's hips, lauding him with generous praise and declarations of his own undying devotion. Sometimes, it felt as if he was taming a star when Seto molded to his tenderness. When their foreheads pressed against one another and they gazed into the depths of each other's souls.

"I love you," Katsuya said ardently. The truth of it pierced through his heart like a stake.

"And I you."

Seto smiled. A small smile, but a smile nonetheless.

That transition between fucking and making love was magical. But their desire to possess and own the other remained, a sweet bed of thorns cradled between their bodies, paradoxically blunted and sharpened by their love. They rocked against one another, giving and taking as they'd learned through multiple trials across the years. They'd come this far, and Katsuya couldn't wait to see what further place they would go.

"What do you want to do tomorrow?" Seto asked. "Our schedules are finally open."

An innocuous question, but one that felt as if it offered the world in this moment.

Katsuya hummed, unable to tear his gaze from his husband's lithe form as he rolled his hips and rode his cock. After a few seconds, he sat up, pulling Seto flush against his lap, impaling and immobilizing him. His husband shivered and gasped. His fingers dug deep into Katsuya's shoulder blades. Katsuya took the opportunity to kiss him deep and sensually until wanton sounds rumbled in the depths of his chest.

"I wanna sleep in with you tomorrow," he muttered against his husband's lips. "I wanna make sweet, aching love to you when you wake up. We can get brunch afterward. Walk around and check out the sights. Shizuka and the others will expect souvenirs. Come back here and press you against the window and take you apart while the sun sets over your gorgeous body. We can go out for dinner later, or get room service, whichever you want. And then we'll go to bed—"

"And have more sex." Seto laughed, lifting one hand from his shoulder to caress his cheek. "So your only plans are to fuck and eat. You are a cheap date."

Katsuya turned his head and pressed a firm kiss to his husband's palm. "Make love," he corrected gently.

"Ah, yes, my mistake." Seto rolled his eyes.

In retaliation, he forcefully lifted Seto by the waist before slamming him down again.

"Ah! Katsuya!"

"But if you rather I fuck you a little stupid, I can do that too. I'll do whatever you ask."

He grinned wolfishly at his husband before nibbling on his lips. Fucking, making love; they could do both at the same time. When he repeated the same motion, it wrung another sweet cry. Seto clenched around him, egging him without words. Before he knew it, he was bouncing him. His own hips chased his husband's tight heat, desperate to bury himself as deep in the other man as possible. Seto moved with him, jerking upward before throwing his entire body weight downward.

Then he arched his body in just the right way, puffing out his heaving chest and hanging low, entirely relying on Katsuya to keep him suspended. His body jerked as if electrocuted, freezing every muscle from head to toe as he clamped painfully hard around Katsuya's dick.

Katsuya had struck his husband's prostate to a heartbreakingly beautiful result. He leaned forward more, dipping Seto as he convulsed, eyes wide and mouth parted in a silent scream. He could do little more than grind against the other man, rutting against his hole and humping his stomach against his husband's pulsing cock until wetness exploded between their overheated bodies.

"That's right. Come for me," he groaned and held Seto close, breathing in the heady scent of sweat and sex.

"Katsuya. Katsuya." His name was a sweet rush of prayer and adoration.

"Seto, I love you so damn much."

"I love you too. I love you."

They collapsed back against the couch in one boneless heap. Katsuya had yet to come, but he didn't care as he cradled his husband to his chest and kissed him until they were both star-struck.

Elegant fingers danced across his brow and traced the slope of his cheekbones. Their eyes locked.

"We're not done yet," Seto reminded him with a cheeky squeeze of his ass.

Katsuya's hips twitched, bucking with renewed desperation. "Yeah? You want more?" That last question should really be a statement.

This time, when Seto smiled, it unfurled like a blossom toward the sun. "Always. Now take me to bed properly."

A corresponding grin spread across Katsuya's lips. "I love a good win-win situation."

[wavemaker9]

"people have an easier time falling asleep around her and sleep heavier than usual" hey so thinking about this re: Trine

because i know a joke's been that trine would be more awake than the other companions so could catch more things, but hey, them being affected by this instead in the version where they're both in camp. and like, they'd still sleep way less than the others. you add 25 to everyone's sleep meter and people who were at 50 or 75 get way closer to if not at fully out, but trine starts at zero and is still under half sleep compared to others, but 25 is still way more sleepy than what it would have been and honestly would spook them a bit, especially early on without knowing why.

Like, imagine Trine actually getting an even decent if not good night's sleep for once. either trine's already joined and then abaddon joins the party after, or trine joins new, and just one day out of the blue, for the first time in over a decade, they don't take approx 20 years to reach a shallow-at-best sleep. the party is out in the wilderness and also there's an ever growing number of other people who will make their own noises in the middle of the night and trine expects to be in and out of sleep all night with all the different sounds. even knowing it's coming, knowing most if not all of those sounds are NOT threats, their body can't help it and they've learned to see it as a positive at this point (largely because what else can they do). sure, they don't remember what a peaceful night was like, but hey! they're alive! that's a good trade off, right? (star wars meme voice) right?

but they lay their head down and it's not out like a light, but it's faster than they even knew was possible. they don't even notice falling asleep. they wake up and they're a little startled to be honest, when it's suddenly sunny out again. i had this thought of like, in a trine only situation, them running into this once post-game with astarion, the first time they genuinely feel safe enough to doze off a little more fully, and it's startling waking up. they're usually so hyperly aware of their night. they'll doze off in little pieces, sure, but they're aware the night is passing, none of this "close your eyes and it's morning" crap, what is that???? it's the jarring sense of waking up from a nap and you need to remember what day it is.

maybe they think it's the worm and/or the dream guardian. the worm wants them to be at their full strength, get some sleep bud, you need it. the dream guardian has some effect on dreams, maybe it can affect sleep as a whole, make them sleep more deeply than they normally would. doesn't even consider it'd be abaddon's fault and why would they???? and hey, either way, that probably becomes their working hypothesis for a while! because if they pried to see who else ran into the same situation, pretty much everyone else would say they did! only one who wouldn't is abaddon, who's been having nightmares and can't remember how normal that is. they sure didn't encounter this before the worm, and even if there was a long rest or two before one or the other joined, could be attributed to a slow effect of the symptoms. so clearly something's weird with abaddon but looks like we found another side effect of the worm. that's wild. astarion voice someone's changed the rules and all that. trine, again, would internally hate it. sure, it's nice being able to sleep well, sure did kinda miss that, but it makes them SO uneasy. how can they protect themself properly if they're getting a full night's rest???

honestly, they might NOT do the poke-the-bear questioning of abaddon's "hey how would you kill the camp in their sleep if you could? not me tho i'd wake up i'm different" because like. the very real consideration that abaddon COULD get close enough to slit their throat or cut out their tongue or slice off their face before they woke up is genuinely pretty concerning. huh, it's weird about that, huh trine? weird how you sleeping more soundly could make it easier for them to kill you. wild.

also, later, after halsin's saved and joins the party, getting the further confirmation there that it's probably not the worms actually. talking to halsin, trying to learn about him, standard affair, but the question comes up about how he's been handling camp life so far and he answers that it's better than he expected, had a surprisingly restful night, that sort of thing. trine ???? questions that further and confirms similar symptoms, easier time sleeping, slept more deeply; maybe it's just being outside of a prison cell but had a very good night! halsin smiles about it, but trine internally like wtf. that CAN'T just be a coincidence but halsin doesn't have a worm so. what the FUCK. back to research then, need to figure out what the fuck is going on.

though also!!! thinking about that pic again of astarion trine and abaddon snoozing and hey. way way late game, trine actually getting more rest and being able to somewhat enjoy it. no longer sleeping in a camp with people they don't know or trust (mostly). might possibly be okay to sleep a little more soundly and not die by morning. just perhaps!

thinking about abaddon, as i usually am these days. idle talking about her being an aasimar under the cut, mostly fun flavor text in the form of divine physical and metaphysical traits

Keep reading

[animatedrapture]

"𝖐𝖎𝖘𝖘 𝖒𝖊 𝖘𝖑𝖔𝖜𝖑𝖞" — suna rintarou ;

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: suna rintarō is so much more than his bored eyes, the blunt between his lips, and his tendency to slack off—luckily, you're one of the very few people who know this; especially after he comes home to you sullen after finding out he didn't make it to the olympic players.

𝖙𝖆𝖌𝖘: female reader. fluff—established relationship. angst if you squint. comfort. mention of drug use. like, one swear word.

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙: 2k

𝖛𝖎𝖔𝖑𝖊𝖙'𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖊: in lieu of the influx of toxic stoner!suna content, i offer you a piece of appreciation towards him and all that he is. i was meaning to post this in my new blog but i thought there's so much of you here who would appreciate and need this more. written on a whim at 1AM and didn't proofread so for any errors, gomen. repost because tumblr tagging hates me. cross posted on ao3 under the same username. original post here. this was written before we got information that he actually made it to the olympic team. furudate really told me to stfu, huh?

It's you who find out first that there is truly so much more to Suna Rintarō than his expressionless exterior, sleepy eyes, and bored gaze towards even the most ridiculous situations. It's when his self assured stance dwindled as he walked towards you once upon a time, introducing himself first before asking you for your number.

"My number?" You echoed his request, trying your best not to gawk at his attractive features and six foot two stature towering over you so easily; making you feel oh so small. (Which is funny, given that you were already standing straight on your heels.)

"If you don't mind, 's cool if you say no," he replies, tearing his gaze from you as if he was actually anxious you'd say no.

It's funny, really. It's not every day a famous pro-athlete known for both his good looks and skills walk up to you, asking for your number and actually considering you'd say no to him and his pretty features—in fact, nevermind that he was pretty, it was more the fact that he wasn't so full of himself to actually think you wouldn't say no.

That's what makes you nod your head; your heart already beating right out of your chest as he gives you a lazy grin and his phone to press your number in. When you're done, you hand it back to him and you mentally pat yourself at the back for not visibly trembling.

"Y/N?" He reads your name from the contact information, and good God, did your name sound so beautiful coming out of his mouth. He doesn't wait for your reply anymore, looking back at you from his phone, the lazy smile still across his lips as if he knew it was a heart killer.

"Thanks, I'll text you later," is the last thing he said before he walked away from you.

It didn't take long for you to fall in love with someone like Suna Rintarō—underneath his detached personality also lied someone who was truly passionate with the things he set his mind to, gave his time to. Like you or volleyball or the video game he's been waiting to release for a whole month—it only had to be something or someone who was special enough, then, he would give it his all.

The smoke that filled his lungs occasionally did nothing to lessen your own intoxication of Suna Rintarō and his passions—because every exhale, his dark green eyes would meet yours and oh so easily, he offers you that same lazy smile yet one that was dripping with affection.

"Should you even be smoking that, Rintarō?" You had questioned him before, about the second time you've seen him put the rolled blunt in between his soft lips, inhaling it.

"It's a once in a while kinda thing, you don't actually think I'd sacrifice my career for this don'tcha?" He grins at you, amusement flooding his usually bored eyes — now glazed over with the effects of the weed—from the way he gazes at you with an eyebrow raised.

It's when you realize that Suna Rintarō was independent and knew what he was doing—did what he did with full awareness, full control, full flexibility. It's as if who he was in court was who he was in person as well.

"You're really interesting, y'know that Rin?" You had mumbled against his chest once before, it was at the first few months of dating—he had one of his arms around you with you cuddled on his side, watching a movie from his couch.

"Yeah?"

"I mean—you've always been so good at what you do, huh? But you still work for it."

"What makes you say that?" You can feel him looking down on face against his chest.

"C'mon, don't be silly. You were scouted at middle school and you only got better as you grew up!" You say, finally moving your head to meet his gaze.

But all you get is a flick on your forehead and his low chuckle, "'s not that deep, y/n," he answers.

But you already knew better.

Suna isn't one for words, and no matter how much you insist that he was beyond the description of words, he only rolls his narrowed eyes at you. You find out Suna Rintarō, your boyfriend, was a huge inspiration during your sixth month together when you finally met his little sister.

It's hard to say it wasn't amusing how snarky she was, just as he was to his friends whom you've met a few times before—Atsumu and Osamu Miya, you remember. She's quick with her tongue, easily retorting back to her brother's comments.

"Are you sure you didn't just pay Y/N-san to be your girlfriend, nii-san?"

"Nah, you still jealous I came out prettier than you?" Suna bites back, a teasing grin plastered across his face. His sister only scoffs, looking back at you.

"You can tell me if he blackmailed you to come here!" She attempts to whisper. You're not sure whether you should be worried or continue to laugh, but you do neither as you choke on the drink you were sipping on right as she told you this.

"Shit, Y/N," Suna curses as you cough, your throat burning at the drink's intrusion, but Suna's quick to rub soothingly against your back as he offers you his water, his eyes glazed over in panic.

"You okay?" He asks when you stopped coughing, and you nod in response—throat remaining slightly sore. Suna lets out an aggravated groan, "Be careful next time," he manages to scold you, but oddly enough, his words remain saccharine.

There's something about the way that his little sister doesn't seem the least bit surprised with his reaction that somehow lets you know that perhaps, Suna Rintarō might just be quite the caring brother behind closed doors.

After that, it was when Suna excused himself to take a call from his manager, leaving you with his sister.

"Hey, nee-san, promise you'll take care of Rin-nii? You won't break his heart, will you?" His sister asks, eyes gleaming with something akin to hope, expectation, wonder. It easily takes you by surprise.

"Don't you worry, I'll promise I'll take care of him, promise I won't break his heart," your voice easily softens, nodding. His little sister's gaze remains on you, as if she's assessing you and as if she would easily tell whether or not you meant the words that came out of your mouth.

It makes you hold a breath until she nods slowly, smiling at you lightly just as Suna comes walking back, eyebrows raised, knowing he must've missed something.

"Whatcha girls talkin' bout?" He asked as he slipped back on his seat beside you.

"None of your business, obviously," his sister quickly answers.

They're truly quite similar, it's enough to make you smile and get through meeting his little sister until both of you dropped her off back to the train station.

"What'd she tell you?" Suna nudged you after seeing her train leave.

"Nothing, Rin," you answered with a wide smile, leaning up to place a chaste kiss against his lips—yet just as you pull away, one of his hands has found its way behind your neck, pulling you back to him.

You never thought a kiss could feel so loving before—but it really seemed as if Suna Rintarō had a knack for proving you wrong, over and over again.

It was the day that the Olympic team was announced when you see so much more of Suna Rintarō. Quick like the blink of an eye, or lightning that leaves the thunder chasing it; Suna felt the exhaustion, the pressure, the burnt-out feeling that's been repressed in the back of his head. It comes to him, crashing down like boulders not just on his shoulders but weighing down every part of his body.

Did he lack somewhere? He wonders. Where did that lacking end and start? What could have he done? Was it training, where he spent most of his time now? Suna had end up seeing you less and less since the drafting of olympic players started and you've been nothing but patient.

What was he supposed to tell you? After all the time it has stolen away from you—that he didn't make it?

When he opened the door to your shared apartment, he doesn't look up at you with a relieved sigh as he usually would—he avoids you gaze entirely, he avoids your observing eyes from the couch you sat on, watching him slowly shrug his shoes off.

"I'm just gonn—" he started, about to make an excuse to avoid looking at you.

"Prepared your bath, Rin. C'mon," Suna hears you say but it doesn't sink in his head, watching you take his hand, leading him to the bathroom.

Suna remains silent as he looks down on the bath you prepared for him, warm and inviting.

"Meet me in the kitchen when you're done, okay?" He hears you say, followed by the echo of your footsteps walking away.

You easily understand that Suna Rintarō was more than his talents, his efforts, and every little thing about him when you feel his large arms wrapped around you, his broad chest pressed against your back and his face buried on the crook of your neck. His fresh scent right out of the shower engulfing you and invading your senses, flooding you with him.

"'m sorry, bunny," he mumbles.

"You have nothing to be sorry about, Ri—"

"It's odd, thought I'd pull it off, thought it'd be nothin' if I didn't make it. Don't know why I'm so upset right now," he continues, cutting you off, "Been so patient for me too, bunny. Thought I'd be nice to make you proud, ya know?"

Your sigh comes out sharp from the heavy feeling from your chest, not knowing what to do to make him feel better—like he did with you, always knowing his way around your low moments.

You wriggle out of his arms, making him grumble until you fully face him. He looks back at you with a small frown, eyebrows furrowed, watching your expression.

"I'm always proud of you, Rin. Olympic player or not, you make me so proud," you speak softly, your hands cupping each side of his face.

"Don't even get why it matters to me this much, it's just—" it was your turn to cut him off, tipping your toes to press a lingering kiss against his lips. Suna smiles against your lips, carrying you to sit on the kitchen counter like he always did—knowing you always would have to tip on your toes to reach him.

Soon, the lingering kiss turns slow and passionate—lips softly grazing the other, and it feels more like pouring the heavy weight of love out of your chest and into the other. A kiss so loving, so reassuring, so passionate—the kind that easily takes your breath away and makes your mind go blank. When Suna pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, breathing heavily. You smile at him because it's all you can do when your heart feels like it's going to leap out of your throat just to offer itself to him entirely—and Suna smiles back at you, pecking your lips before wrapping his arms around you again, resting his chin on your shoulder.

You run your fingers through his hair, hoping it would help soothe him, and then you say, "I promise that you'll make it next year, Rin. I'll be with you now, and I'll still be with you then."

It only makes him hold you tighter, closer to him, "I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, Rintarō. You deserve the world and all the stars in the galaxy."

"'s too bad there's nothin' more I need than you, then."

That's what Suna tells you—Suna, who was smoke in his lungs, dumb videos of the twins to blackmail them with, little mistakes, bored eyes, and lazy attitude. The same Suna who was slow kisses, passion, and genuine smiles reserved for you—the same Suna who gave his passions his all, the same Suna who held you securely in his arms every night, the same Suna his little sister admired. Most of all, the same Suna Rintarō you loved with every beat of your heart, every fibre of your being.

📞 violet is calling... all content featured belongs to ©️ animatedrapture. do not plagiarize, repost, or modify.

[smolfailure]

FUCK IT, DREAM SMP HOMESTUCK AU

but it's only half shitposts and there are actual Thoughts in there.

You don't need to have read the comic to understand because I tried not to spoil anything major, but it'd help if you knew basic stuff about classpects, SBURB and the hemospectrum.

disclaimer: i'm not a good pixel artist and this is my first actual sprites ever so please be kind to my weird pixels

The Kids:

Tommy

Fundy

Techno

Tubbo

tommy, tubbo and fundy one of the kids because they're the kids in dream smp canon (with fundy being son of wilbur)

techno's there because i want to make a dave strider reference (haha get it because techno's name is also da-- *gets shot) and also because they are both coolguys except instead of using irony, techno has adhd

The Trolls:

Wilbur Soohte (fuschia)

?????? Ehrret (violet)

J????? Shlatt (purple)

Nihacu Niikki (indigo)

Skeppy Diamon (cerulean)

Quacki Tthiey (teal)

Philza Myncra (jade)

Dreame Wastkn (lime disguising as olive)

George Notfou (gold)

Sapphe Nahfpe (bronze)

Badboy Haelow (burgundy)

don't come at me saying only females are allowed to be jades and fuschias; gender is fake and this is an au

more of the AU and the talksprites are under the cut:

Tommy

Lunar sway: Derse. Types in: Red

chaotic. the first person to be introduced.

when he gets introduced instead of the “Zoosmell Pooplord” bit, Tommy is initially going to be the name inputted but then backspaced it and decided that Tommyinnit was better and he was fuming until he’s named Tommy.

Gives me big Blood/Hope vibes. Blood because a lot of the conflict of the dream smp connected to someone breaking his trust or harming the things he cares about, Hope because a lot of the plot of the dream smp stems from Tommy starting shit based on his ideals and what he thinks is right.

the first to instigate fighting against the trolls

bbh contacts him once and tommy keeps cursing until he disconnects from frustration rip

wields Gunkind and his only strife weapon at the beginning is the Vlog gun. He has Gunkind as his strife specibus mainly because he looked up at schlatt and he imitates him.

Fundy

Lunar sway: Prospit. Types in: Orange

it was his idea to play SBURB but only through Dream.

he talks to dream the most among the other trolls fwt stans getcha juice this is the rosemary of the session

dream’s the one giving him exposition about the game so that’s how he knows how to play SBURB.

wilbur trolls fundy once and instantly adopts him.

“You’re my son.” “How does that even work??” “I was one of the people who created your universe. It’s basically the same thing.”

Fundy relents anyway.

Techno

Lunar sway: Derse. Types in: Pink

dave strider but dead-inside voice + rose lalonde english major vibes

he slices the text box when you try to name him "Dave " like in

techno gives me time player vibes (contantly on the move. his skyblock series, his “stays in the pit” monologue,) but also rage vibes (anarchy,  the “theseus” monologue, political alignment is Chaos) alas i am not sure what class

uses Tridentkind and claims "it came from god"

 it was dream, he accidentally transportalized one of wilbur’s weapon while he testing the transportalizer.

Tubbo

Lunar sway: Prospit. Types in: Green

the jade harley of this session. the only thing keeping them from going apeshit. where would they be without him.

but also jade harley in a sense that he seems nice and wholesome but also don’t fuck with them they can mess you up

Heart/Life vibes??? someone good at classpecting help

i put them in prospit bc of the "tubbo third eye" instead of tubbo having a sixth sense or smth, they see the future from the clouds of skaia when they sleep

wields Stress-relieverKind at some point

bonus: everyone’s actual hair colors

Ideas about the Trolls

no i haven’t done their sprites yet bc it would take so much time and i’m not even sure if people wanna see more of this au skjdkdsakdfkl,, but i have Design Ideas.

events of the dsmp revolution are just a FLARP session drawing parallels to how the homestuck trolls had a FLARP session that spoiler alert: destroyed friendships. dtrio, eret, will are involved. eret betrays will's faction and wilbur's still Bitter over that.

on the context of alternia (highbloods and lowbloods) lmanburg and dreamsmp have their roles SWAPPED.  the emancipation theme thing is completely gone since highbloods are in more power than the lowbloods (the dream team) . 

wilbur made a faction called l’manburg because he wants a place where he and his fellow highbloods could make drugs vibe.they take a piece of land that was owned by the dream team. in normal circumstances, they shouldve stood down because lowbloods aren't supposed to start shit with highbloods (especially a group of highbloods that has the alternian heir among them)  but dream turned it into an activism thing about lowblood rights. the story plays as close as possible without tommy or tubbo in it (which is pretty hard ik but this is the best can do).

like in the dreamsmp revolution, dream kinda let wilbur do what he wants but this time he has more reason to because he’s in a lower caste. dream really only fought back when wilbur announced that he’d be building lmanburg on their land and calling it theirs.

eret betrays wilbur by supporting the lowbloods and wilbur and co. technically won but only because he finally called the drones in, as a reference to how lmanburg absolutely got crushed by the dream team in the smp but technically won. l’manburg keeps the piece of land and the dream team scatter away to find a new home.

wilbur soot's a fuschia because a) he's in a position that has a lot of power, b) yknow how he wrote a song about squids and his thing with sally… yeah.

eret's a violet because nobility!! dream looks down on him because he's ambivalent on fighting for lowblood rights when he's in a power to do so "you just sit there, and you look pretty that's it"

also like eridan he has a minor aesthetic mutation (herobrine eyes) that won't classify him as a mutant.

jschlatt is purple because it makes sense thematically because of the gamzee parallels (a. substance abuse b. if you know what happens in act 6, you know this already but spoiler alert, he ruins the main protagonists' lives) also he's a funnyman he deserves the clown caste

 quackity's a teal because he’s a law student. moving on--

 ok but for real it also makes sense thematically because he's the one who wrote the thing that tricked schlatt into agreeing also he gets manipulated by schlatt which also draws parallels to certain events in the comic

skeppy and bbh are BEST FRIENDS despite being highblood and lowblood respectively. initially, skeppy just wanted to bother bbh but they grew to be good friends in time. y’know like how they actually becane friends :D

philza minecraft is a jade because dad friend. also works thematically, because spoiler alert he gets to murder a seadweller for going batshit crazy. 

he also god tiers early. he dies fighting his quick undead denizen (haha baby zombie) but the consorts of his land carry him to his quest bed because he’s treated them all so well.

dream was initially going to be another caste but then i realized that means i have to make his hoodie something other than green which is unacceptable so its a good thing the fact that he's a lime works out

dream was the one who thought of playing sgrub in the first place- initially only planned to have gogy, sap, and bbh in the session but then realized that they four won't be enough so he invited more into his session

he’s also the first to go godtier ez clap blind speedrun not sure what classpect tho

the only reason why dream avoided being culled at birth for being a limeblood is because his rng is That Good. he quickly picked up the fact that he’s not supposed to exist and masqueraded as an oliveblood and kept mostly to himself to avoid suspicion.

george is still colorblind but he has lazer eyes along with it instead. dream lives with him in the same hive since being a mutant means dream doesn’t get a lusus of his own (dnf fans getcha juice “and they were roommates”) 

despite living in the same hive, he never really figures out that dream is a limeblood. possibly because a) he’s colorblind and when he sees dream bleeding he just sees yellow b) he’s just that fucking oblivious and it’s so valid of him.

sapnap’s a bronzeblood mainly because i know he’s the instigator of the pet war with tommy also because i associate him with the color orang in my mind so bronze it is

that’s the end of this long-ass post!! if you have other ideas PLEASE i want to hear them. i don’t know the other streamers i mentioned in here very well so if you have ideas that would be fitting to them like with classpect or lunar sway that would be GREAT. 

the only thing i’m confident about in here are the kids’ lunar sways. i’m not an expert in classpects and homestuck lore so there’s that too!! i just wanted to make this post because adhd means that the idea wouldn’t shut up until i finished it. This initially started as a single shitpost edit of tommyinnit talksprite but then the hiveswap 2 trailer came out and that means i have to combine my two hyperfixations.

also i have ideas about potential quadrants but idk how much of that is breaking some streamers’ boundaries about shipping (even the non romantic quads such as kismesistude, morallegiance and auspisticism) so i decided not to include it.

edit: apparently people want more so i made a discord server as a place to brainstorm!! please pm me to join!

[jjaeong]

The Heiress, And The Twelve. Act I.

Episode VI: To Be Deceived, Or Protected.

Series: KPOP Girl Group: 이달의 소녀 (LOONA).

Pairing: OT12 & Mafia Heiress Female Reader.

Summary: While the members residing with The Heiress in Eden managed to resolve her internal conflict about who she was and who she had deemed herself should be—Haseul, along with Sooyoung and Jinsol, discovers a certain string of information that could potentially lead to a much more greater complication than they had ever encountered before. And as Jinsol finally reconciled with Sooyoung after the incident, Hyejoo and Heejin find themselves stunned as they come across your room—realizing that something had been missing in the vicinity, with that something being you.

"Why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be with the members?"

Jinsol had just managed to set her foot on the top of the staircase when she met the sight of the distressed Ninth member who had lingered in the hall that led to the boss' office, pinching the bridge of her nose in clear disbelief with the disrupted idea that only she was called by Haseul for the meeting. It's been days since the Leader had regarded her request to be removed in any missions with the Seventh member, being that she was still sensitive over what had just happened with the incident—Jinsol had already been walking through thin ice with her miscalculation, but Sooyoung's projected anger towards the woman intensified when Jungeun had informed them of your order to be left alone. And as much as she was relieved that both her member, and her adoptive sister were safe—Sooyoung couldn't shake off her impression that you had not been unscathed, because physically, you and Hyejoo were well, but your order was the effect of the event which she had deemed also as her own error with being one of the Twelve.

The Seventh member, however, no matter how many times she had blamed herself for it, she had understood Sooyoung's hostility towards her and knew that it was absolutely justified—from all those years that the members had grown together, she knew well enough that the woman was as emotional as she could get, more so for the people she cared for the most. But the Seventh could only take so much, she had somewhat prepared herself for the the member's response—yet she still couldn't avoid condemning herself over it, for the most part being Sooyoung not wanting anything to do with her.

And as Sooyoung stood there, leaned back against the hall's wall with her arms crossed and her brows knitted in apparent frustration while looking the other way—Jinsol could only manage a hesitant smile as she tried her best to swallow down the bitter aura between the two of them, before directing her weary gaze towards the tall double doors at the end of the hall. Slightly taken aback by how isolated the scene had looked from their position, which meant that the Leader had not yet arrived—making Sooyoung the first person to have been called by Haseul, and Jinsol quickly becoming the second.

"Is it.. Just the two of us..?"

"She just told me to meet her here, and that she'll be arriving shortly from her visit with our guests," Sooyoung muttered, practically scoffing at the mention of the Lee Family that had been staying in the Mansion as they awaited for their Boss' recovery. The younger of the two winced at the recollection of when they'd first arrived at the infirmary with the Lee Family's Boss, and how Sooyoung raised her tone at Haseul for the first time since she'd been appointed as Acting Boss after declining Sooyoung's plea to head straight to Eden—which led to the Ninth member into defying the Leader's instruction and driving all the way to the castle, just to be pulled aside by a stone-faced Jungeun, "but you still haven't answered my question—why are you here?"

"I don't see why I shouldn't be..? Haseul did ask for me—"

"I specifically told her that I don't want to be in any operation with you right now—and for what? Suddenly she doesn't listen anymore?" Jinsol would be lying if she said that hearing those words come right out of Sooyoung's mouth didn't hurt her, she swore that when this member of theirs was mad she knew exactly how to do so—but to be on the opposite end of the woman's livid state, Jinsol had never experienced to be this ridiculed by her. The silence that had come after Sooyoung's sharp words even made the member glance at Jinsol from the corner of her eye, finding her head hanging low as she picked on her blue pin on her tie in deep contemplation—slightly irritating Sooyoung even further because the Ninth had known that the habit was common with the members since they'd acquired their pins, holding onto the object when they couldn't seem to find it in themselves to assess a situation in their own way.

"Maybe we're not on a mission as a pair, probably.. A reschedule? Change of posts? Haseul assigning you to my spot—and me with yours?" Sooyoung gripped onto the fabric of her sleeve as Jinsol began to straighten her tie, which she had done several times before looking behind her to the staircase below—as if Haseul would just magically appear out of thin air and cut through the tension between the two of them, saving them from possibly making it worse than it already was.

"That's great, maybe then Y/N wouldn't be in as much trouble as she'd be if she was under my range of security." Jinsol frowned at the malicious tone that the Ninth had suddenly switched into, making her turn to eye the member who still refused to meet the clear regret plastered all over her features—while Sooyoung continued to glare at the nothingness that had seemed to have kept her attention more than the member currently standing right in front of her.

"Sooyoung.."

"Just admit it, Jinsol—you despise her. You don't want her to be our Boss because she's nothing of what you expect her to be—it's a full circle to what happened the day we told her everything, you want her gone." Sooyoung spat as her member flinched, making Jinsol shaking her head in attempt to relay the message to Sooyoung that it was nothing of that sort.

"That's not true—I care about her just as much as you do!" the Seventh stammered, completely taken aback by how she had been suddenly accused for having felt something that she had not.

"She was in the lot! You could've prevented it even before he approached her—"

"And you think I don't go every single day thinking about that!?" Sooyoung's furious eyes snapped to connect with Jinsol's exasperated ones, the Seventh's demeanor looking as frustrated as she could get with her hands balled up into fists hanging by her sides while her eyes stayed connected with her member's, "We've never had any complications with our group since the beginning, and ever since Y/N came in the picture—it's as if the least we can do is not turn against each other."

"Oh, and that makes it her fault? Is that what you're trying to say?

"I'm trying my best to understand—alright!? I thought we can continue this Family without having her in the picture, but.." Jinsol tore her eyes away from Sooyoung's to think carefully about her next words, having an inkling that whatever she may say next would be enough to tip Sooyoung off the edge and tarnish her reputation completely—or in some sort of miracle, she'd be able to properly express what she had wanted to say, "I didn't want any of that to happen—I swear that if I could have stopped it in all the ways I've calculated it after, I would've. But it's already done, I messed up and the only thing I can do is try to make up for it with Y/N—for as long as she'll have me, and if she can't forgive me for what I've done then.."

Sooyoung lowered her eyes at Jinsol who shrugged her shoulders in defeat, sighing when she thought that the apology didn't go exactly as she'd expect it to be. She'd thought that once she laid her heart out, it'd go as smoothly and sincerely as she'd thought—but instead, she felt that the reason for Sooyoung's silence was that she had taken her words in the complete opposite. Her words being taken under the impression that she was over it, that she didn't care as much as she said she did—causing the gap between her and the members that had your well-being as the priority to broaden, when she had just warmed up to the idea that she had wanted the same thing as well.

The Ninth member eyed the struggling woman in front of her, it was clear that Jinsol was incessantly thinking through what she had just told her and continuously trying to criticize her choices of wording—but as much as Sooyoung hated the thought that had led her into blaming Jinsol for what had happened, the greater part of her that believes that the members would never do each other wrong was pushing past her projected anger. This wasn't them against a common enemy anymore, this was Sooyoung's protectiveness over you—against her protectiveness over her members, but instead of it mostly being directed towards the Lee Family's Boss, she had Jinsol to blame. And that was what caused her inner turmoil, Jinsol is her member and a member that had been one of the reasons that put you and Hyejoo in danger—but Jinsol was just as much as a member as the others, yet there Sooyoung stood, continuously reminding her that she had messed up and she needs to feel the consequences of her ignorance.

Sooyoung then realized that Jinsol had already been going through the motions just as she'd been, and it was unfair of how she was quick to blame her for it—when Sooyoung had no idea about what was about to come until Hyunjin had some sort of vision.

"Well—apologize to her, not me," Jinsol practically choked at Sooyoung's mumbled response, feeling the weight of her worries fall off her shoulders as she watched Sooyoung shake her head at her and detach herself from the wall—slipping a hand into the pocket of her dress pants as she placed the other to her neck, craning it as if to stretch in exhaustion. The member still had a pout set on her lips but her brows were anything but furrowed, just looking drained from the encounter—while Jinsol slowly started to fall apart in her position, "you can start by how you acted in our living room, then with whatever happened with the Lee Boss. She's not the type to hold a grudge, you know—yah! Jung Jinsol, get off me—"

"I thought you'd never forgive me! I apologized so many times and you were never this mad—"

"Let go!" Jinsol continued to wail as Sooyoung's pout threatened to stretch into a grin while she tried to pry the member's arms off her, opening her mouth to start threatening the Seventh. But just as she was about to, light footsteps started echoing from the steps behind Jinsol and soon after revealed an absorbed looking Haseul—which had seemed to be caught off guard at the sight as she blinked at the two who just froze in their spot and stared right back at her, Haseul's eyes softened only for a moment before they dimmed yet again.

Looking away from the two, Haseul motioned over to the end of the hall before starting to make her way past them.

"You've made up, good. Follow me." the youngest of the three started to walk down the halls, which made Jinsol release Sooyoung from her hold before they both hurried to trail behind the Leader—eyeing each other in question about what had the member in such state, Sooyoung could only hope that it was just something connected to the Lee Boss and nothing more.

As Haseul pulled the key out of her pocket, Sooyoung had remembered that the last time all twelve of them were inside the office was when Haseul had first sat herself into the Boss' chair—how she carefully laid out what specific orders the previous Boss stated before he had passed, and how they would slowly but surely make sure you were well acquainted with a few members. Haseul also swore that it would also be the last time that she were to set foot inside of the office, not finding it comfortable how she would occupy the room as if it were her own when her purpose was to have you settled into your rightful place.

And as if Jinsol could hear Sooyoung's thoughts coursing through her, they could only wonder how much trouble the Family had caught themselves into for Haseul to break her own word.

"Shut the doors behind you, I've asked to keep this floor vacated until one of us leaves the room." Jinsol quickly turned to shut the doors behind them as Sooyoung followed behind the Leader to stand in the middle of the room while Haseul circled behind the desk to open one of it's emptied drawers, reaching far into the compartment as if rummaging to find anything that had not been in there in the first place.

"Are you looking for something?" Jinsol question as she stood beside Sooyoung who eyed the Leader suspiciously, the two watching Haseul shut the drawer to then move to another.

"What are you even doing, Haseul?" the light sound of a click echoed through the spacious, and moonlit office that had Haseul tensing up on her spot. Jinsol made a move to approach to the woman and lend her a hand but Sooyoung grabbed ahold of her arm before she could even do anything, the two members carefully watching as Haseul pulled out what seemed to be a thick stack of papers—jaw clenched while she placed them on the desk before looking up the puzzled expression on her members' features.

"Lee Seokmin has returned to his conscious state today, he refused to speak with the doctors and requested to speak with the one he perceived as the Family's Boss. And so I paid him a visit," Haseul shut the drawer to fully grab the stack from the desk, eyeing the papers before walking over to the two and meeting them in the middle of the room, "he was convinced that I was Y/N, stating that he couldn't believe that the previous Boss' plan worked—how he kept the Heiress safe by letting her live a normal life outside of the Family, all while being protected from the other Families."

Jinsol paled as Sooyoung let go of her arm, eyes widening in alarm while Haseul stood in front of them with a vacant expression on her face.

"He asked me if I knew about it, when I found out about it—confessing that he knew about the documentation because he had overheard it once from the Jeon Family that the Heiress was being watched."

"We were watching over her, but I thought the documents were supposed to be discarded after the Boss' passing?" Jinsol barely questioned as her voice failed her, switching her eyes from Haseul to Sooyoung who could only look at Jinsol with wide eyes as well.

"It was, I saw through with it. Haseul, Vivi-unnie and I were the ones present when it was erased."

"He wasn't talking about our documents, he was talking about this." Haseul motioned to the papers in her hand, it didn't take too long of the three to stare at each other before Sooyoung reached over to grab the papers and start inspecting each and every page—feeling lightheaded at the information that she had read from it, how as if every page she had skimmed through just continued to reveal a deeper story behind the minimal observation reports that they had set for you.

The papers dated back up to four years prior to the previous Boss' passing, several pictures of you, Jungeun, and Jiwoo were practically on each page of the stack—the lightest conversations, passed homework, your every move was typed down as if they were studying not a living human being but a test subject. Through the documentation, it seemed as if you weren't the Y/L/N Y/N that the members had made a point on learning to care for and to believe that you'd lead them into a better future—but rather a statistic in which would demonstrate if you were fit in becoming a Boss for the highest ranking Family there ever was, and ever will be if you had truly had what it takes.

Whoever had created this document, only had that particular version of the Heiress in mind—and it made Sooyoung feel sick to her stomach.

"Who.. did this? How did you even know this exists!?" Sooyoung's voice started to raise as she looked up at the torn expression on Haseul's face, making Jinsol take a step in between the two to try and calm the Ninth member down while also turning to glance at the Leader behind her—but as Sooyoung started to prod Haseul with questions while waving the papers in her hand, Haseul swallowed sharply before looking up to meet the the concerned look on Jinsol's face.

"I didn't."

Haseul's words echoed in Sooyoung's head, and before she knew it—she had let the papers fall onto the ground, pushed past Jinsol to reach for Haseul's collar to aggressively grab ahold of her. However, Jinsol was quick to recover after staggering back—attempting to pry Sooyoung off of the Third member by wrapping an arm around the Ninth's waist and tugging her off the Leader.

"You—you're our Leader! You can't just tell us you have no clue! our lives are dependent on your choices—and you have the audacity to tell us you don't know!?"

"I thought I had properly vacated this room after we all left—that was the last time I've been here, it was all the previous Boss had instructed me.." Haseul barely whispered, crumbling under Sooyoung's hold to the point that it was the member that had been keeping her up on her feet—making Sooyoung snap out of her fuming state to watch the dread sink into her member's features, "he told me where everything was, the archives we needed—I thought he told me everything I needed to know, I was appointed Leader for this."

"Sooyoung, she doesn't know." Jinsol dragged out slowly as she loosened her grip over her member, walking towards Haseul and prying the Ninth's hands off completely from the Leader—all while keeping Haseul up on her feet by wrapping an arm around her shoulder, leading her to the desk so she had a place to lean on.

"The Twelve, Y/L/N Y/N—that's all I know, you have to believe me."

"We do, Haseul—Sooyoung's just in shock, we'll figure this whole thing out. Right, Ha Sooyoung?" the Ninth continued to stare at the two, absolutely mortified that they were currently easing themselves into uncharted waters—completely unknowing of what would come, but only to prepare themselves for whatever it may be. Sooyoung caught Jinsol switching her gaze from Haseul to the papers on the ground, the Seventh seemingly the more composed member out of the two—and as if moving completely out of practice, Sooyoung bended over to grab the papers and walk over to Jinsol to hand it to her.

"What do you suggest we do?" Jinsol's eyes widened at the blank, yet expectant look that Sooyoung held as she offered her the papers—glancing at Haseul who had now held onto the desk as if her life had depended on it, before she caught onto what exactly it was that Sooyoung was trying convey. With Haseul's Leadership position becoming nothing of aid to the members as of her current state, Sooyoung wanted them to work it out as a group instead of letting the woman carry all of this on her own. So Jinsol grabbed the papers from her hand, eyeing the front page and skipping to the last as she followed her gut—having a relieved sigh escaped her lips as she pointed a finger at the signed letter 'R' initial at the end of the page, it's ink shining under the moonlight while she directed it to Sooyoung's view.

"We can start by tracking whoever this is?"

"Alright." Jinsol gave Sooyoung a small, yet grateful smile before looking back down to scan the papers while Sooyoung turned to Haseul who sat still on the desk—completely frozen as she tried to recall every bit of information that the previous Boss had passed onto her, fingers gripping tightly onto the pin on her tie. The Ninth member reached over to place an consoling hand on the Leader's shoulder, halting mid-way but somehow going through with it—which made Haseul visibly tense but when she had found that it was Sooyoung from her peripheral vision, she just looked back down to return into her state of recollection.

"I shouldn't have lashed out, Haseul. I'm sorry."

"You have every right to be mad, I'm the appointed Leader and I can't even uphold a simple task. Even I'd be mad at myself." Jinsol snorted from behind her which made Sooyoung glance at the member, finding Jinsol eyeing Haseul from the side before flipping another page from the stack.

"You mean tracking down this profiler from just one initial? Haseul—you can't even find the right curtains to hang inside your room without Yerim." Sooyoung's lips broke into a grin which made Jinsol release a laugh, making the Leader turn to look at her members who were now laughing amongst themselves as they eyed the paper in Jinsol's hands. Haseul then looked up to find Sooyoung's careful eyes directed on her, the member giving Haseul a determined look in contrast to the Leader's downcast expression.

"You might be the Leader, but we are a team, Haseul. We'll get through this mess, with or without the previous Boss' help." Haseul tore her eyes away from Sooyoung to look back at Jinsol's thoughtful expression as the member continued to inspect the page—until she found Haseul watching her, so she gave her an encouraging look before raising a fist in the air.

"Damn right we are! Fighting!"

"If you use that language in front of Y/N—I swear, Jung Jinsol—"

"Your sister is a year away from graduating High School—she's old enough to know if cussing is bad or not."

"You don't tell me how to raise my sister!"

"She's our future Boss! She can decide that for herself!" Sooyoung placed her hands on her hips as she continued to banter with Jinsol as the member continued with her task, the two completely back to the way before their feud—while Haseul watched them silently, feeling the anguish of her assumed failure as a Leader slowly dissipate as Jinsol and Sooyoung continued on. The interaction had somehow eased the Third member's worries, the sight reminding her that no matter what happened—they were still the Twelve, and with that, the world would still be turning for as long as they'd stay like this after whatever may cross their path.

"Until we've figured out who this person is, be that they're in this Family preparing for another coup—or from outside, this stays between the three of us," Haseul stated, making Jinsol's look up to clearly try and object but one pleading look from Haseul—she had known that her intentions were nothing but for their safety, "please, the more people that know about this—the harder it will be to find them. One word about this from anyone but us.."

"They'll know we're onto them—got it."

"But what do we do about Lee Seokmin and his members?" Sooyoung crossed her arms on her chest as Haseul turned to look at her, more composed than a few moments ago.

"They'll be returning to the village that Jeon passed onto them in a few days, I made sure that he didn't recognize that I wasn't the Heiress he was talking about. All he can pass to whoever he pleases is that the Y/L/N Family's Heiress is back in her rightful place." Haseul concluded as Sooyoung released a heavy sigh, looking at Jinsol yet again but this time—Jinsol had lingered over one specific page.

"What is it?" Sooyoung leaned over to check at what the member was staring at, which made Haseul completely turn to peek as well when Jinsol practically gripped onto the stack in worry.

"From the beginning of the document, they never mentioned any names—they even labelled Jiwoo and Jungeun as Upperclassmen A, and Upperclassmen B," Jinsol placed a finger on a specific sentence on the paper before looking up at Haseul and Sooyoung, "'4:35PM: The Heiress returns home. Property under the name of 'Ha', a civilian household consisting of two adults and three daughters.'"

"Don't tell me—"

"Who ever this 'R' person is—they know exactly which one of us is the Heiress."

Hyejoo had just shut the door to Jungeun's empty room, signalling the end of her morning rounds which consisted of surveying the vacated rooms of the members that typically headed to school approximately two hours before her—when she had realized that today marked the fifth day since the incident, which made it Wednesday. And Wednesdays were different, because in that specific day Yeojin and Yerim would accompany Jungeun and Jiwoo for early morning Student Council. With Yerim being the President of her class, and Yeojin being her own—Jungeun had briefly talked the two into either occupying their roles once they've graduated, or at least being part of it.

The two Maknaes were quick to take her up for it, being that they had fit the credentials well—they'd agree without a doubt, but that had meant that every Wednesday, Hyejoo would only have to drive her and Chaewon to class. And it wasn't that she wasn't on good terms with her Gowon-unnie, it was quite the opposite—because every Wednesday morning would be Chaewon asking Hyejoo about how she's been, and how she had felt about whatever had happened the days before. Somehow, it had slightly bothered Hyejoo that she had always started off their conversation in that manner since Yeojin and Yerim rode with the two Unnies—but the ride had seemed to grow on her once she realized that the Eleventh member wasn't shooting up a conversation to fill the silence, but to genuinely ask Hyejoo how she's been.

Park Chaewon had surprisingly seemed to have understood her even in that alley, which was something that goes over Hyejoo's head sometimes.

The Twelfth's eyes seamlessly connected with your door in the middle of the hall as the recollection of the alley felt similar to what happened that day, and being that only room in that specific hall was only occupied by you—with Haseul, Sooyoung, Jinsol, and Kahei being everywhere at once, the closest member that could reach you incase of an emergency was Jungeun, because her room was the closest to yours. Hyejoo started to make her way to your room almost subconciously to check up on you when she was met by the unusual sight of Jeon Heejin who was never usually awake this early in the morning, already dressed in her uniform—glowing as if she'd just awakened to the greatest sleep she's ever had, her eyes even widening in surprise as she found Hyejoo coming from the other end of the hall.

"Son Hyejoo! Good morning!" Heejin waved enthusiastically with both hands outstretched, making the Maknae scrunch her nose up in distaste as Heejin grinned adoringly—eyes turning into crescents while she continued to her venture into your room, the sound of her footsteps lightly decreasing as she neared. The First member carefully twisted the handle to peek into your room, her smile impossibly widening as she expected to be greeted by the sight of you laying on your side with Jeon Stitchie and Hyunjin's Shiba Inu—only for her to squint her eyes through the darkness to find the two stuffed toys but not even the top of your head revealing from the covers in sight.

"Y/N-ah~?" Hyejoo heard Heejin call from her position, slightly peeking through the door frame, making the Twelfth member furrow her brows and stand behind the member just as she had flipped the light switch on—illuminating the empty room before walking inside and making her way over to the door that lead to your bathroom, pushing it open to find it unoccupied as well. Heejin continued to scan the room, even getting down on her knees by your bed to check if you were under it as Hyejoo stayed put by your door—watching her Unnie's puzzled features slowly turn into concern just as she saw someone approaching by her peripheral vision, she turned to find an equally confused Chaewon standing next to her before the Eleventh turned to her.

"Have you seen Vivi-unnie?"

"Did you just come from the Surveillance room?" Hyejoo questioned in reply, but before Chaewon could even get a word out—Kahei appeared from the end of the hall, seemingly reading a book while doing her rounds as she donned her reading glasses. Heejin had managed to slide past the two members just as Kahei was about to walk past them, making the woman look up from her book to eye the startled trio in wonder.

"What's with all the worried looks? Did something happen?" Kahei asked softly, making Hyejoo and Chaewon exchange glances while Heejin looked at your empty room before looking back at Kahei.

"Unnie, Y/N's not in her room." Heejin stated in a tone that had slowly started to reflect her dismay, but as Kahei tilted her head at the three something flashed in her eyes before she stared directly at Heejin—as if she should've known.

"Of course she isn't, she already left with Jungeun and Jiwoo. Why? Is there something I should be worried about?" Hyejoo's eyes widened in surprise as Heejin mouth popped open at Kahei's nonchalant reply, Chaewon was the only one of the three who had managed to not be surprised—considering that she had been looking for the Fifth member to ask why she had been the one to send you and the other members off as she watched a replay of the cameras just as she had woke up.

"You let her go, just like that?"

"I didn't see a problem with it—she had me convinced, afterall," Chaewon raised a brow at Kahei, to which the member only smiled at before walking past the bewildered Heejin and Hyejoo and return to reading her book as she walked down the hall, "Heejin, it must be some miracle that you woke up before Hyunjin—but if you don't wake her up you'll both be late to class. You two should start getting ready as well, Hyejoo, Chaewon."

The three members watched as Kahei disappeared from the hallway, turning to face each other briefly before hastily doing as the member had told. Heejin switched the lights off and shut the door before speed-walking down the hall to Hyunjin's room—pounding her fist against the door the second she reached it and tugging on the handle as she followed by calling her member's name. On the other side of the door, Hyunjin had already been awake, she was just about ready to leave—all she needed was to attach her pin onto her tie which she had quickly finished, so she grabbed her bag from her desk to pull the door open and roll her eyes at the sight of her aggrievated best friend.

"I get it—you woke up before me for the first time in years, you don't have to shove it to my face." Hyunjin pushed past Heejin who was trying to catch her breath, breathing in deeply before stopping Hyunjin dead on her tracks with what she was just about to say.

"Y/N isn't in her room—she left with Jungeun-unnie and Jiwoo-unnie to school!"

"..She what?"

Greetings,

I hope this message finds you well—sike with the formalities, it's a tumblr post, there's no need for that. But what this Author's Note actually needs is.. An apology (even though I came clear with you all if you've read through the first chapter to not be too attached with this story) because it's been over two months since my last story update!

But in all honesty, I'm not even sure if it had actually been two months or.. A month and a few days—but still! Am I back? Maybe~ What could JJ have been possibly doing to go MIA for this long? Real life stuff, but mostly the overwhelming feeling of Orbit twitter that's.. Something, a true bit of love and hate between that.

It's actually funny how many Episode VI's I've wrote before properly settling with this one, the first draft had too many new characters involved (spoilers for who they are? I'm sure if you've read a few LOONA fics—it's just in between those lines), the second and nth were all too messy—and so there's this one! I think it's a nice turn, considering that this is the half of Act I. and I literally just wrote this in one go again, I really can't believe myself at this point.

Though I think most of our new readers that are following this blog is more into the OS spectrum—so I should maybe start leaving posts? Like.. Talk? But it's not really my thing, having posts up but it's just me talking about God knows what—I don't really know how to feel about it.

I'm getting way over ahead of myself again, so yeah. I truly hope you guys are doing well out there, what's happening outside of these social media platforms is absolutely petrifying—I made this blog as an outlet to express how much I love the girls but you can't escape the crippling truth that is reality itself. This world is unforgiving even to those who had never done anything drastically wrong, and for a writer to not have the proper words to express how they truly feel about what's happening around them.. Please take care of yourselves, and I'm sorry for not being able to find the right words for this.

Laters,

JJ.

>ovc: loonatheworld (200316).

https://youtu.be/U5z35vxC9bs

[slashersins]

You've made a few posts about getting stoned with Michael in the past,, how do you think it'd be with some of the other slashers?? And like, which ones do you think would be into it and other ones that maybe aren't sure about it but would try it if they knew you liked it? and which ones would not smoke or take anything EVER? I'm just very curious to hear your take on this !! I mean... don't think you've made any previous posts about this?

okay so , lets break this down into categories ! they’re pretty well spread out , so here we go !

the ones who would smoke

michael myers . big surprise here . big boy likes to get high . however , he prefers editables . if you want to smoke , that’s fine , he won’t take a hit . pass him a brownie . also , be prepared , this man gets lazy and hungry and very touchy . he’s a fucking cuddle monster when he’s high . kind of like a needy kitten who wants pets in the middle of the night and will lay across your face , only to jump off and eat food as loud as they can before coming back for more loving . michael is exactly like that . also , if you want high sex , you’re gonna have to take charge and ride him , he’s just gonna enjoy his high and pleasure while you do the work . 

vincent sinclair . it’s one of his favorite ways of relaxing . he’s done it since he was a teen . bo discovered booze , he discovered weed . he’s no less intense when he’s high , still staring at you , still touching you , only his movements are slowed and less delicate . he wants you close , in his lap , against his side . he’ll play metal music in the back ground , letting smoke swirl around the both of you . expect a lot of smoky kisses and long gazes from your man . he’s high as fuck and you’re the only thing important to him right now . a living breathing work of art . 

carrie white . carrie ? our sweet girl ? doing the weed ? it’s more likely than you think ! while she might take some convincing , her deep need to rebel against her mother brought on by the courage you give her has this good girl shyly taking a hit . she will cough . give her water and praise and tell her it’s all okay . it happens , you can take it slow . and please do . let the high slowly seep into her skin and lungs and let her feel light and relaxed . she’ll want to cuddle , and you should stroke her hair and just talk . you’ll smoke and talk for hours , never getting so high that you’re both far gone , but getting high enough that everything is slow and hazy . you might even get some shy kisses from your sweet girl , and she’ll giggle and hide in your chest , feeling free for once . 

the ones who would rather drink 

bo sinclair . everyone knew he’d be on this list . the man drinks so much he should have a beer gut and how he doesn’t is beyond everyone . whether it’s a beer after a days work , a couple after a rough day , or an entire pack after a bitch ass week , this man usually has at least one a day . he likes the buzz he feels . he likes how in some ways he can forget about shit . but mostly he just wants to get fucked up and sleep . while he can be a bastard when sober , he can be one when drunk too , running his mouth . but he also tends to get a little more emotionally open when drunk , so you might end up hearing him say things he will pretend not to remember in the morning .

lester sinclair . another beer drinker in the sinclair home , only he’s a lot more casual about it . he’s like a social drinker , only having two or three . he’s a goofy drunk , stumbling around and laughing and chattering on . vincent and bo find it hard to be upset after a rough week if they have lester over to get drunk . it’s also funny to them that their baby brother is such a light weight . he gets really embarrassed when he does get drunk enough that he’s making a little bit of a fool of himself , but he’s so cute that vincent and bo can only tease him . 

thomas hewitt . while this big country boy wouldn’t mind a ice cold beer , he doesn’t drink all that much . maybe once a month or so , sometimes once every two . and he rarely if ever gets drunk . he’s seen charlie / hoyt drunk too many times , and had too many run ins with drunk as fuck bastards when the slaughterhouse was still open . he doesn’t want to be like that , so he keeps himself to no more than two beers at one time . he doesn’t mind the taste of beer , and it really is more of a social “you earned this” type of deal for him . 

the ones who would do both

jesse cromeans . this man drinks only the most expensive , oldest scotch , whisky , bourbon , and wine . he drinks casually , he drinks socially . but he does not drink to get drunk . no . he tries his best not to actually . which is surprising to most , as he was considered a bit of a play boy party boy back in his earlier rich boy days . but while he doesn’t get wasted on booze , he does enjoy getting high as fuck . he’ll only do it in the comfort of his own home . relaxing and smoking and watching old videos of his . might jerk off a little , might snuggle up to you . might pull you into his lap and laugh with you as you both watch stupid videos on the internet . one time you laughed at a picture of a blurry paper bag for two hours . jesse won’t leave the house until his high has completely worn off . he doesn’t wanna be caught off his guard .

billy loomis . he’s a bad boy . what can i say ? he’ll drink , he’ll smoke . as long as it’s with you and stu and he’s having fun ? who cares . billy is a messy drunk , getting naked and wanting to bite and kiss over you and stu , even if it doesn’t lead to anything else . it’s just too hot for clothes and he wants his babes close . he’s a munchie having , giggle gremlin when he’s high , however . while its more snickers than giggles he will almost laugh at anything , wanting to be the one cuddled and coddled while he eats chips and shakes with laughter . 

stu macher . loud and handsy drunk , however if he drinks too much he gets a bit violent towards others . which is why you and billy know when to cut him off . when he’s just normal drunk , he’s wanting to touch and talk and talk and talk . he won’t know he’s being too loud , just spilling out words and nonsense for fun as he lays across whoever is closer . as a high boy , he’s almost completely quiet . he’ll just lay and stare and watch with his mouth open in awe . sometimes he’ll start giggling but then he’s back to dead eye staring . he’s also gonna be cuddling things that he thinks are you and billy but aren’t . like a pillow . or his cat . 

the ones who would never do either 

brahms heelshire . this man will only drink sparkling grape juice . he doesn’t have the pallet for booze and he doesn’t like the smell of weed . he has no issue with you drinking , as long as it’s fancy whine , chardonnay , etc . you have to be classy , like mummy and daddy were , if you drink . he might take a sip , but he’ll prefer his juice , thank you . 

jason voorhees . he’s highly against all things booze and drug related . he literally kills people who show up on his land , he makes double work of them if they do either of those things . he’s a good boy , momma raised him right . if you do either , he’s conflicted and a bit upset . you’re his special person , you’re good , why are you doing bad things ? if you explain to him that it’s just a small glass with a meal during like , thanksgiving or christmas , he might relent . and if you tell him the weed is for pain and it’s legitimate , he will be less inclined to be upset with you . but still , he doesn’t like it . 

bubba sawyer . bubba doesn’t like the way booze and beer make people act . he doesn’t wanna act like that . he got drunk once , and he hated it . it’s the same with weed . he has a strong sense of smell and his little nose hates the way weed smells . which is why he babbles at chop top to call him stinky . if you drink , he might be a bit skittish , thinking you’ll try and hurt him like so many others have . it’ll take a little bit of patience to calm him down , and tell him you’d never . he would like it if you didn’t drink , but if it’s only a little and you aren’t being mean he’s okay . as for the weed , he might pout because now you smell like chop top , but the way you giggle and act is cute . so he doesn’t hate it as much . 

jacob goodnight . no . just no . hard no . no drugs . no booze . not you . not him . he just can’t . years of religious abuse have ingrained some roots that are too deep to pull out . and for jacob both of those things are a no .

martin ( 1977 ) . martin doesn’t do either . he already feels off as it is when he hasn’t fed recently . and he has no need for drugs or alcohol . why would he ? besides , he doesn’t want to make any mistakes while intoxicated or high . it’s just that simple . he’ll say no politely if offered . if you drink or smoke he might make a mild complaint about how you don’t need those things , about how it makes you taste off and he likes it when you taste like you . the only drugs you should have inside of you are the ones martin gives you to sleep . 

[neptunetheplanet7]

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 - 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 & 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

DM ME IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE PUT ON THE TAGLIST!!

;mikasa ackerman x fem!lesbian!reader

;modern au, band au

word count: 2.1k

warnings: swearing, slight angst in the beginning but not really, fluff

i owe you guys an apology. i’m not very active on tumblr as of posting. i’m sorry about that. school has been hard on me and i’ve been very stressed. i’ll try to do better in the future :)

listen to the music masterlist

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Armin was discharged from the hospital only a day after the accident. The doctor said there was nothing extraordinary to worry about. But of course, even with this information, Eren still made a fuss. That much was clear when he walked through the door with Armin's arm slung over his shoulder.

"I didn't break my leg, Eren. I don't need to use you as a crutch," Armin grumbled as the two walked into the kitchen from the garage. He reached back to shut the door with his free hand.

Eren rolled his eyes. "Well, excuse me for supporting you in these trying times."

"I don't need your support," they scoffed. He unwrapped his arm and made his way across the room.

Eren gave him the finger, rather aggressively. The gesture wasn't reciprocated since the blond already disappeared into the hallway.

Sucking on a freeze pop, you leaned back against the cool countertop. "Welcome home, lovely. Have fun?"

Eren sighed loudly as he walked toward the freezer and got a popsicle for himself. He grabbed a pair of scissors and cut the top of the wrapper off into the trash.

He said sarcastically, "Oh, absolutely I did." He paused and shook his head disapprovingly. "He's a lot bitchier when it's us two. How's it been here?"

You shrugged. "So, so. Pretty quiet."

He nodded and pushed up the pineapple-flavored ice. "Thought so. Jean's gone today, obviously. Is Mikasa here?"

You huffed softly at the mention of her. "I haven't seen her since breakfast. She's been upstairs all day."

He frowned. "Oh, I see. Armin told me about the kiss, by the way. At first, I was gonna make fun of you for passing out but now that just seems cruel."

"You think?" You laughed lightly and rested both arms on the counter.

The sound that followed from him was more of an exhale than a laugh. "Listen, Y/n, even if she's avoiding you right now, I know she'll come around. Just wait and see."

"You're right," you mumbled, sticking the freeze pop in your mouth again. Armin basically said the same thing. Eren sent you a quick smile and patted your shoulder before leaving through the hallway.

You swallowed the remaining ice and threw away the wrapper. Noticing the bin was full, you took the trash to the bigger bin outside. Maybe doing some chores would distract you from Mikasa for a while.

Plus, today was the only day that allowed you to do so. Practices for the band's upcoming performance were every day until the date of it. You'd be rehearsing 24/7 since it was scheduled on such short notice.

It was going to be at a middle school some of your friends went to. The DJ they booked before flaked and your manager was kind enough to offer your talents.

Jean was meeting with Hannes and the school administrators to work out some extra kinks before the practices began.

The only day there wasn't a rehearsal was on Eren's birthday. You all decided it'd be best to take the day off to celebrate and set up for the party that would be happening later in the night.

The day passed easily as you got caught up on chores that weren't done over the past few days. The house was messier than you liked it although it hadn't been long at all since the previous clean-through. However, it had been a hectic week.

Speaking of hectic, when Zeke was there, he sure made himself at home. That much was clear when you made it to the living room portion of the basement.

Eren probably couldn't find time to clean up yet. Either that or he was just lazy because at that moment he was more focused on a pinball machine than the state of his living space.

His brother's suitcases were lying open by the couch. To be honest, you didn't love the idea of a criminal's possessions lying around your home. So, you decided that throwing them in a storage closet was the best option. 

When you finished tidying up, you started a game on the pinball machine next to Eren's.

His birthday was in three days. The house looked a lot better than it did when you started, which was perfect for throwing a party. You could only hope it would stay that way.

After a few hours of playing games with him, Jean came down the stairs to let you know he was back from the school. He left when he saw neither of you were interested in what he had to say.

Once it got dark outside, you left Eren to his own devices and went to your own room to chill out some more.

Unfortunately, when you flopped down on your bed, Mikasa started to consume your thoughts again. In an effort to fight them, you turned on a show to distract yourself.

For the slow hours you spent staring at the screen, you couldn't focus, not once. No matter how hard you trained your eyes on the screen, you still thought about her.

Sighing, you got out of bed and walked to your bedroom door. You were careful of the creaking hinges, it was around midnight. Everyone would either be asleep or close to sleeping.

Except for Armin. You had no idea what he did at night but you knew better than to ask. However, he was probably pretty tired from the time spent at the hospital. So, there was a solid chance he actually was asleep.

You crept outside, checking that the front door didn't make too much noise. Your car was parked in the driveway since there was never room in the garage. The gravel underneath your feet made noise as you walked toward it. You pushed yourself onto the hood and leaned back against the windshield.

Drawing in a long breath, you stared up at the sky. You needed to calm down and clear your mind. This would help, as it usually did.

Even if it was a little chilly, it was warm for a night in March, especially this late.

The stress that bubbled inside you simmered down the longer you watched the thin clouds dim the stars.

Any negative thoughts you had about the situation with Mikasa or the previous days seemed to disappear the longer your focus was on the sky.

Gravel crunched and you snapped your gaze toward the noise. Sitting up, you were surprised by what you saw.

Mikasa froze when she realized she'd been caught. She held a white blanket in her arms and still had one foot on the porch steps.

"Hi," she greeted quietly.

"Hey." Your breaths were a tad ragged from the initial scare.

She came closer to the car. "What are you doing out here so late?"

"I could ask you the same thing." You took the blanket from her arms and she pushed herself up to sit beside you.

"The door to your room was open when I came downstairs for a drink. I thought you'd be out here."

"Oh." She knew you better than you thought.

She spread the blanket over both of your laps and leaned down on the hood of the car.

She looked at the sky but your eyes were still on her. "Why did you come out here?"

After a moment of silence, her gaze finally shifted to you. "I wanted to apologize. Ignoring you was immature. Plus, I remember how you used to come out here when you were upset. Above all else, I wanted to make sure you were alright." A blush coated her cheeks when she finished talking.

You took note of that and couldn't help but blush yourself. "I'm okay. I understand why you'd ignore me, though. If you didn't want it, that was probably your only option since we have to see each other so much."

Her brows furrowed and she sat up again. "What? Y/n, did you think I didn't want to kiss you?"

You blinked stupidly. "Well, yeah."

She laughed. "You can be so ridiculous sometimes. I've always wanted to kiss you like that. I'm just not great at expressing it."

Even more heat rushed to your face. You gawked at her and she looked down at her feet. Many things were running wild in your head. For some reason, though, there was one thing that was so prominent in your mind once you remembered it.

Out of all the questions you could have asked, this one came out rather bluntly. "What did you mean in your letter? What should I know?"

Her eyes widened, she didn't expect you to ask about that yet, and quite frankly, neither did you. Nonetheless, she answered anyway. "If only you knew. That's what I wrote. That's easy to answer now. If only you knew how long I've loved you."

She turned her face and made direct eye contact with you. She seemed to know the next question on your mind. "You never knew it but I've been in love with you since high school."

That can't be right. This is a dream. You're dreaming, Y/n. What the actual fuck?

"Are you sure? Then why did you ask Jean out when we were seniors? Why did you break it off with me mere weeks before?" Your mind was racing and it translated into sentences quickly spilling from your lips.

She still looked straight at you. Her facade of confidence was making you nervous. "I'm sure. Back then, I was so afraid of what I felt for you. Pretending the feelings weren't real and projecting them onto Jean seemed like my easiest option. For years I convinced myself I loved him. But it was never him. It was always you. I felt so awful when I realized what I was doing."

And just like that, the facade fell. Her words were no longer held confidence. She was afraid of how you'd react. She had little idea that you were ready to be just as vulnerable as her.

"When did you realize?"

Looking up at the dark sky, she pushed a stray tuft of hair away from her face. She continued, sighing softly before she spoke, "When I saw him that night with Marco, I was relieved that I didn't have to be with him anymore. When I tried to figure out why that was, I could only think about you. Every feeling that scared me before came back. I got so scared that I left. But, even then, they never went away."

You were having some trouble believing that this was actually happening. Mikasa loved you back this entire time. If she hadn't kissed you before, you would've thought this was only possible in your dreams.

However, things were actually starting to make sense. That whole time it was your fault. Every night of those two years you spent wondering about what you could have done to make her stay. It turns out you did enough. You were the reason she left. 

But maybe you were the reason she came back as well. You could recall something Jean had told you a day before she came home.

"Why did you come back? You needed to do something?"

She looked back at you again. "I've just done it," she said.

Before you could process her words, she was leaning closer to you. Her lips were so close to brushing yours but she paused before they could fully touch. "Can I?" she whispered.

"You don't even have to ask."

When she kissed you, you felt everything. Her feelings, your feelings. The world was minuscule compared to you two. Anything else meant nothing at that moment.

It was the first time in a long time that you felt fully complete. You were a puzzle and she was the missing piece. It was like before, only this time, you knew for sure what you wanted.

Pulling away, you managed an, "I love you too, Mikasa." 

There were no other words that would feel so good to finally say out loud.

Everything was clear. You understood. 

Now more than ever, you wanted to be with her.

posted: 9/26/21

neptunetheplanet7© 2021

no reposts, edits, or modification to my work by anyone other than me.

[tiredassmage]

👑 …someone my muse is jealous of.

inhALES OH THIS ONE IS. OH YOU DON'T KNOW HOW PERFECT THIS ONE MIGHT BE. Oh, oh no... oh, my heart... Okay, this is actually kind of the subject of a recent WIP that I'm still trying to feel out the execution of, so please look forward to it?? I'm gonna tackle this one specifically for the version of events where Astor ends up with Gaius.

But it's a complicated and messy one. It's not a feeling Astor likes, nor is he exactly keen to admit or discuss how its gnawed at him at times.

It's... in a strange, strange way... Gaius. I cannot remember if I've posted I think the one other fic where I've had them wrestle with this admission, but it rears its head in the Shadowbringers afterstory where the two of them are still trying to figure out exactly what's up with their relationship. They've slept together, they've called on one another more and more, and, by that point, they've said that they love one another, but words and labels just don't seem to cut it for Astor when he tries to settle on his feelings for the Garlean.

Before I get too off on a tangent about that, let me address why he's jealous of a man that... arguably, why would anyone think you'd be jealous of in his circumstances, after everything that's happened?

And that is because it's a tricky manifestation of Astor's bone-deep exhaustion with being a Warrior of Light by that point. At its worst, it can be an all but crippling, almost suffocating desire to get out of it all, but knowing he could never bring himself to say the words, that it'd just leave the burden of all the fighting, truths, and secrets to some other poor bastard that's maybe just as, if not more so, unprepared for all that entails than he was five years ago when all he wanted to do was maybe help where he could.

So, at that worst, he almost has to ask... Why in the seven hells didn't Gaius take the way out? Everyone thought he was dead. And who wouldn't, given the state of the Praetorium? Who would have leapt to the idea that the Black Wolf was the same man that had retired quietly to some nook or cranny of the world to just... take what time was left to him? Who could have blamed him, rightly?

And it's worsened by the bittersweet taste of this that Astor felt travelling to the First. Not a soul that hadn't already known him knew who he was or what he'd done. He was just another sinner trying to make do in a world gone to hells. To most of the people they met, it wasn't about fixing the whole damn world. It was enough that they eased what burdens they could in the moment.

It made him realize how much he missed it. How lost he really felt.

And, as if that wasn't enough, I think there's some few moments where Astor almost envies his resolve, the way he just put his head down and kept moving forward, certainly his experience that aids him in doing so. It's hardly a secret that the age difference between the two of them is plenty notable enough.

And that's maybe a better word for it... Envious. Quickly wrapped up in guilt for even having the thoughts and the doubts.

It's... all a little fucky and very often leaves me scrambling to reassure both of them that they're fine, please, you guys deserve happiness after all you've been through, we can figure out the details as we go, but... at the same time, they're human, so I think it's an important element to give room to breathe in their development - both for Astor as an individual character and for their relationship. Astor's really only ever been in one other committed one, and I think it shows in some unsteady, sometimes really sloppy strides they have.

At the end of the day though, they trust one another, and that means communication about these kinds of things is open, even if its not graceful or a topic they enjoy. It's important to address though, so they try their best.

[roll-da-credits]

A Bunny with Bunny?  -Tamaki x reader-

Word count: 2k

Tamaki was someone who needed constant reassuring, you knew that when getting in a relationship with him. But sometimes, you forget. With a new tiny addition to your family distracting you and taking all your time, its hard not to get insecure and jealous.

A/n: AHHHHHHH, I can’t. I hope you guys enjoy the first fanfic I post here. I’ve literally never posted in Tumblr ever. I’ve always used Wattpad.

It was common knowledge by this point that Tamaki Amajiki had a lot of insecurities and anxiety. It only heightened when it came to you.

Although, a lot of the time you diffused his anxiety and insecurities pretty quickly once you realized. Whenever it came to you, he found himself deep in thought at night thinking if he deserved you.

In his mind, you were an incredible person with an equally wonderful personality. While he, on the other hand, was shy and riddled with nervousness at any social interaction. You shone bright, much like Mirio, he thought of himself as nothing compared to you.

Every single time he's had one of those thoughts, you'd be able to sense his doubts by the way he carried himself. Not doubts about your relationship or you, but on himself.

So, the entire day you'd stick close to him, showering him with light affection that you knew won't embarrass or make him feel even more embarrassed.

He considered himself EXTREMELY lucky to have someone as understanding and caring as you in his life. He knew dealing with his myriad of issues was difficult. But you went through them with no problem.

You even helped him with helping himself. By your constant words of affirmation, he's been able to be a bit more confident, even when you weren't there to help him.

Time went on, and by the second year you were dating, he barely had any doubts about himself in your relationship.

That is until he heard your conversation with Nejire.

"Just look at him!!!" You squealed in excitement.

 He was going through a hallway when he heard your and Nejire's voice when the hallways separated to the right and left. He stopped to listen in, curious about what you were talking about.

 "He is adorable." Nejire seemed to agree with you, peeking at the corner. He saw how you gushed about whatever photo you were showing Nejire.

His heart sank a little bit, but he wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was a photo of a family member.

"I just met him like last week and already have A LOT of photos of him."

Ok, this is starting to not sound like a family member.

Maybe it's a friend's baby brother. You have a lot of friends outside of the school you were close to their siblings as well.

"I just want to pamper him with all the kisses in the world and give him world!!!" You gushed.

Shit.

 Tamaki felt his heart drop. There's no way you were talking about a family member. Not by the way you seem to be enamored by them.

He tried to think back on when you seemed to lose interest. Thinking back to last week, did you act any differently?

If you did, he didn't notice it. The problem was last week you said you were ridiculously busy with stuff at home. He could even see from the tapping of your foot to the ground when it was last period you were aching to go back home.

Was it because of this new guy?

His heart clenched at the thought.

"God, I love him so much." His mind begged him to stop listening.

But before walking away, he wanted to hear what Nejire might say. There's no way his best friend would be ok with this.

There's no way she wouldn't protest at you being infatuated with another person when you were still in a relationship with Tamaki. That's just what a good friend would do. Instead of that, she said jokingly.

"Watch out a certain blue-haired boy might get jealous." You both laughed at her remark.

Did you think he wouldn't get jealous over you doting on another guy?

Did the nights you spent together cuddling and napping together really meant nothing to you?

His insecurities crept back into his mind. Tiny voices whispered about how he should've expected it. He should've expected someone as radiant as you would never want to be with someone like him.

His vision was blurred by the lot of tears that came down as he furiously tried to wipe them away.

He didn't watch the way he was going, and as a result, he bumped in head first to someone's chest.

He tried to mutter an apology, yet it came out as a stuttering mess of squeaks. "Woah! Slow down, Tamaki. What's wrong?"

Mirio.

Thankfully the guy he bumped into was Mirio, one of the most understanding guys he ever known.

Mirio pulled Tamaki to the side, where they both sat on a nearby seat. He patiently waited as Tamaki rubbed his eyes red, trying to clear his eyes from tears.

When Tamaki finally calmed down a little and is now just sniffling once in a while, Mirio braved himself to ask the question.

"Hey, Tamaki, what's wrong?" Tamaki's gaze still fixed to the ground, spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. "I think Y/n doesn't love me anymore."

Mirio's eyes went wide in shock. He didn't believe that in a second. You're the person who'd take any chance you can get to attack Tamaki with kisses or force him to cuddle with you whenever he felt unloved.

"Why do you think that?" Mirio composed himself. "I overheard them and Nejire talking about some guy she found cu- cute."

He stuttered a little bit at the end, finding it hard to believe that he would ever say that out loud.

"There has to be a misunderstanding here. Are you sure it's not just some celebrity or a family member?"

Tamaki heard the small panic in Mirio's voice. He knew Mirio didn't want to accept the fact either. "I heard them say that they just met him last week and that they wanted to give him kisses."

Mirio rubbed his temples to try and cope with the upcoming headache caused by stress.

There would be no way that you'd do that to Tamaki, is there?

There was a possibility that you and Tamaki's relationship didn't work out. He knew relationships aren't always permanent. But he didn't believe that you'd be such a coward, flirting with other guys when you were still in a relationship with someone who's head over heels for you.

"Tamaki, how about this." Mirio wanted to come up with a plan. Since it was already time to go home anyway, he thought it'd be a great idea to do it. "You and I can both go to Y/n's house, where they're most likely at right now, then we can talk about it."

Tamaki looked like he was about to disagree until, Mirio cut him off, "We need to make sure we read the situation correctly. We don't want to assume the worse, but at the same time, we shouldn't be needlessly positive either."

Tamaki gaped at Mirio's calmness. He knew he was so lucky to have Mirio as a friend. Someone level-headed that was able to bring Tamaki's mind to the situation at hand.

Tamaki agreed with Mirio together made their way over to your house. Albeit, both of them pretty nervous about what they might uncover.

When reaching your front door, Tamaki noticed how your parent's car wasn't there, which meant they weren't home. Tamaki took the spare key you gave him and opened the door.

It was relatively quiet until there was a high-pitched squeal from your bedroom.

Tamaki jumped at the sudden sound, and Mirio identified it as Nejire's voice.

"HE LOOKS CUTER IN PERSON!!!" They both heard Nejire scream.

Both the boys had incredibly bad feelings about this. Nejire's statement only confirmed the fact that you had brought this guy to your house.

Tamaki shook his head when Mirio motioned him to open the door to your bedroom.

He didn't want to see you all over a new guy who took your interest.

Hell, he didn't even want to be there in the first place.

Mirio sighed and nodded. He understood the circumstances his best friend was in and decided to open the door first.

When he did, the sight made his mouth gape open.

"Mirio!" You greeted the Tintin looking man (he looks like Tintin sue me.) "I've been looking for you everywhere. I want you to meet a special someone."

Tamaki, from behind Mirio's muscular physique, was still hidden from the two other people in the room and also couldn't see anything.

He only assumed the worst.

"This is Shiro. My parents bought him as a gift, and isn't he just the cutest little thing."

Wait

Wait

WAIT

BOUGHT??

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BOUGHT???

Tamaki pulled Mirio away from the door frame and looked at the sight that made Mirio so speechless.

Nejire was sitting cross-legged on the bed, her hand filled with fresh and clean greens.

You were sitting cross-legged as well, but on the ground. In the middle of your legs slept a tiny little black and white Dutch rabbit. (search them up they're adorable)

Now he understood why Mirio was speechless.

It was never a family member.

It was never a new guy.

It was never even a human being.

It was a fucking bunny.

He got so jealous to the point of crying, over a damn bunny.

Embarrassment seeped through him and he instantly walked to the corner of the wall to face it.

He should've noticed the litter box in your house. And how there were tufts of fur stuck on your clothes.

God, he felt so dumb.

You were so confused at your boyfriend's sudden timidness, but because of the tiny little ball of fur currently sleeping where you're sitting. There's no way you'd move and stir him from his sleep.

Mirio laughed out loud, and you quickly quieted him, explaining how bunnies are easily spooked.

He apologized and sat cross-legged in front of you, examining the tiny bunny thankfully still deep in slumber.

"Tamaki heard you talking about little Shiro to Nejire today." You nodded, while your hand softly caresses Shiro's head.

Tamaki shuffled closer into the wall, wishing to any god out there to melt into the wall. "After he told me, we genuinely thought you found a new boyfriend."

Your eyes widened and you looked over to your shy boyfriend.

Your heart ached at the thought.

Luckily for you, Shiro began waking up. Upon waking up, he promptly walked away from you to examine the new human being in the corner of the room, Tamaki.

You stood and gave Tamaki the biggest hug from the back you could muster.

Shiro nuzzled on Tamaki's ankles a little bit, making you giggle. "He seems to like you a lot!" Tamaki still refused to turn your way.

"You know in the RARE chance that I find someone even better than you. Which may I add is close to impossible I would never lie to you and still be in a relationship with you." He valued your honesty and the way you didn't try and make empty promises.

Mirio and Nejire took this as a cue to leave. Nejire, leaving the leafy greens on your bedside table above some tissues.

You took Tamaki's arm and turned him to look at you.

"Hey, hey. Have you been crying over this?" His gaze still fixated on the floor, he nodded.

You sighed and took one of your hands to his cheek to caress it. He enjoyed the warmth of your hand and leaned into it more.

Still trying to reassure him, you gave him a small peck on his lips.

Reminding him that right now, he was the most precious HUMAN guy in your life.

Shiro suddenly thumped at the ground with his two back legs. Both of you glanced over at the tiny bunny.

He looked pissed. He seemed to be demanding your attention and is furious to not be getting any.

Both of you burst into laughter at the silly behavior your bunny was now showing. You both sat down on the floor and began to give the bunny attention.

"See even he's jealous of you." You picked Shiro up on both your hands, all his four feet safely planted on the palm of your hand close to your stomach and not high from the ground.

Tamaki looked at you and Shiro and smiled intently. "Bunny with their pet bunny."

Your face heated up at the comment he made using your pet name, "oh shut up." You tried not to sound flustered but failed miserably. By the dopey smile you have decorating your face right now, Tamaki knew you were still ridiculously in love with him.

Even if one day you're not, Tamaki feels good knowing you'd break up with him before you hurt him any further.

After all, you are his most precious, incredible, kind, caring, daring, loving, patient.

Bunny

[haicuties]

Hi!! I hope you're having an awesome day 😁 I just found your blog and I love it lots!! I was wondering if you could continue a proper "endinf" / part 4 to the single dadchi post!! It'd be great to see what happens with their relationship / healing of the past / day to day life with their new family set up :)!! Thank you!!

hopefully this is closure for someone LOL used to have a book with what i wanted to do with this series,,, idk where it went so this is on the fly after reading what i wrote years ago. possible part 5? idk. -admin omi

Part I Part II Part III

warning: slight nsfw lol

It’s been almost two years and some months since you and Sawamura made your relationship official, and then about 9 months since he proposed to you. There has been a lot, and I mean a lot of adjustments you both had to make in order for this relationship to grow. A lot of arguing, crying, forgiving, and fucking your differences out. Both of you still have very deep wounds that have not completely healed, heck, maybe will never heal– that’s why you both always give your best, always putting in 100/0 effort.. Your parents love Sawamura, although they questioned why you would put 100/0 effort when something could happen.. afraid of what’s happened before, but they understood once you told them that you don’t expect anything back, you love him and that’s all that mattered– and he felt the exact same way.

0832 - Sunday morning

As the sun beamed through the blinds, you felt the warmth gradually increase onto your face. Looking to the other side of the bed, you saw him. The one man that made the pain of your late daughter, less painful. 

“Good morning, my beautiful wife.” he quietly cooed

“Were you just watching me sleep?” a small chuckle left your lips as you sat up to stretch, bringing his shirt to lift over your stomach. 

“As I do every morning, what can I say? I have the most beautiful woman sleeping next to me.”

“Yeah yeah, do you want coffee? I’m going to make myself some tea” you asked while standing and looking back at him seeing him nod.

Walking down the hallway, you peek into Manami’s room to check if she was still sleeping, knowing she’s likely to be knocked out. “As I thought, out like a light.. Maybe I’ll surprise her with pancakes.” You thought closing the door

Sawamura trailed behind you to join you.

“How is my second baby doing anyway?” He asked while rubbing her belly“Mm, she’s fine, moving a lot this week but that’s to be expected, I do only have a little more than 2 months left until her due date.” putting your hand on his you smiled softly. 

7 months prior

Sawamura sat you down and asked how you felt on having another child now that you were married. 

“I understand if you’re on edge about it.. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately– I just didn’t kno–”

“I– am nervous.” You said cutting him off“I have been thinking about it.. I am just afraid, that I’ll lose another.. Lose you. You already know after I got pregnant with Nori that he left.. I just don’t want you to leave either.” you said stuttering, you felt the tears welling up around your eyes“I’m not like him, and you know that! I would never leave you! Y/n, you make me feel something, happiness that I haven’t felt since Kayo.. you brought happiness to Manami!” he exclaimed, feeling the tears as well. “I’m dedicated to you. And only you.” 

“.. And Manami.” you laughed trying to lighten the mood. “Alright, physically, I am ready to bare another child, mentally, I am still afraid, but not as much now..” 

Seeing that it would be a bit difficult to try for a baby with Manami around, you both decided to drop her with her grandparents for a little more than a week, as a ‘vacation’ for her. Thrilled she was more than okay with it considering Daichis parents had a dog. 

After that, for the entire 8 days she was away, you both used any time (and anywhere) you could to try to have sex. “You think that was enough?” He said panting “I’m pretty sure the amount of cum I pumped into you over the week could amount to an entire gallon.”

Laughing, you looked at him and then down to your swollen pussy lips “Maybe, I guess we’ll find out in a couple weeks. If not, I mean your parents love having Nami over.” 

A couple weeks later, it was official. You held the pregnancy test in your hand showing the clear plus sign. “I’m pregnant..” you thought thinking back to when you found out you were pregnant with Nori.Sawamura then found you crying on the bed because of it. Your fears and anxiety were getting the best of you, and it was hard since now that it’s real. It feels like this is an attempt to replace Nori. And he knew you thought that too since that’s what he felt when he met you, like he was replacing Kayo- it wasn’t that though.. This was and is you both healing wounds that have taken charge of your your lives since the tragedy happened.

Turning to him, tears flowing down your red tinted face “I’m pregnant… and most of all, scared..” He sat down next to you and hugged you tight, bringing your body onto his lap and kissing you everywhere.“It’s alright to feel the way you do. I felt the same when I realized I loved you. It hurts, it feels wrong, but it also feels right.” he said bringing your chin so you could look at him He had a point, before the thoughts ran through your head, you felt happiness seeing that plus sign glow on that pregnancy test.

Back to present day

1047 - Sunday morning

”Darling, can you finally wake that daughter of ours to come eat? I made pancakes!” you giggled “Yes, I’ll go fetch her.” he said walking towards her room

Peeking into her room, “Manami? You up?” “Kind of daddy, I smelled pancakes.. Did mommy make.. pancakes?” she queitly said under the blanket half asleep waiting for a confirmation“Yes. thats right, she did make them.. the chocolate ones too.” 

Immediately, she jumps out of bed and runs towards the bathroom to freshen up “OKAY IM COMING!” she yelled out while visibly trying to rushYou set the plate of freshly made chocolate chip pancakes at the table and started to make everyone’s plate. Before you know it, Manami is sitting in her chair with fork and knife in hand impatiently waiting for her plate“GOOD MORNING MOMMY! I AM HERE TO EAT!” she shouted as Daichi sat down next to you“Well good morning pretty girl, you seem very energetic this morning.”“THAT’S BECAUSE MOMMY MADE ME PANCAKES! I LOVE PANCAKES” “Yes I sure do know that little one. Go on and eat up my love.” you said smiling softly while putting her plate in front of her and giving Daichi his

Sitting down, you rubbed your belly and sipped your tea. Looking at your two loves, you couldn’t help but think “How could I be so lucky with a family like mine..” 

[deliciously-yeeted]

I was in desperate need of some beel fluff, so i wrote some. As one does. Uh, ive never done this,(posting fanfic, i normally jus write small things for myself tbh😅) before so please have mercy lol

I hope ya like it though, it put a smile on my face so im hoping it does the same for you♡

____________________________

You started filling the hem of your shirt with snacks, as many as you could fit in the scrunched up fabric that is, a tired but playful grin on your lips, as you thought over what you planned to do, mentally prepping yourself.

Normally, you're not so bold about seeking out comfort and such, feeling shy about showing vulnerability...but today, ugh, today had you particularly worn down. You needed something, affection preferably. You'd settle for a warm bath and some melatonin if you had to. Though, you really didnt want too.

You were tired of self soothing all the time. And Asmos care packages could only help so much. But you knew how to make it all magically better. There was only one option in times like these .

You worked quickly, excitement bouncing around in your gut, making your hands a little shaky.

Having grabbed all you could you carry, you practically dashed from the kitchen. Your mind set on finding a certain big demon. Last you heard, he was headed to his room for a bit. You hoped he was still there.

When you finally reached his bedroom door, you found yourself in a tad bit of a pickle. Your eyebrows furrowed, the realization that you wouldn't be able to open the door making you frown at the closed door briefly. You cursed yourself slightly, for not thinking that far ahead. You forgot in all your excitement.

Briefly you considered trying to use you feet before dropping the idea. Guess you've got no choice.

Dang it! You felt kinda bummed that you'd be losing the element of surprise, but the grin soon returned, thinking about seeing Beel always you happy, regardless of the circumstances.

"Beeeeellllllllllll!" You called out, letting a bit of a whine into your voice, hey, who knows? Maybe it'd get him in front of you faster?? He tended to be on the slower side of answering his door, sometimes he simply didnt hear it. Especially if he was working out or watching tv.

Apparently, whining his name did not speed him up:(

You were about to call out again, worried he hadn't heard you, when the door clicked open. The mere sound making you feel slightly giddy. Your eyes snapping up to meet his briefly. You soaked in as many details of him as you could, without just straight ogling him, before flicking your eyes back up to meet his.

"Y/n?" He seemed pleasantly surprised, dressed in a black tank top and grey sweats (you were happy to see him wearing them, because while he looked like a whole ass meal in them, it also meant he had no plans of leaving the house tonight).

His eyes were quick to find the odd lumps wrapped up in your shirt, as well as the bit of tummy peaking out. The position you held your shirt in had caused the bottom of your stomach to show, something you had worried about on the way here, anxious about a different brother catching a glimpse of you. You could feel his stare burn against your skin, he was about to say something, but then his nose twitched, and his eyes fixed on your bundle of snacks instead.

-

Not that you minded his staring your stomach, not with Beel.

The others...maybe.

Your tummy was one of his favorite parts about you, he's hands finding their way under your shirt to touch and squeeze the soft flesh more often than not. Always gentle and non intrusive. I think he'd full on cry if he accidentally upset you somehow tbh.

Boy had absolutely no shame about it, once he learned you didnt mind much.

Especially when you seemed to be a bit shy about showing your stomach, with the others, or just in general. He made sure to let you know how much he loved your squish. Be it at RAD or just casually in the house.

The only person who ever raised a fuss over it was Mammon, although, he tended to fuss over everything you did anyways;; His protests did absolutely nothing to deter you or Beel, much to his dismay.

Sometimes, if Beel was hungry and needed a distraction or a quick 'pick me up', he'd scoop you up and just shove his face into your tummy. (Much like what I do with my cat when I'm bored and/or sad) Then he'd just hold you there until he absolutely had to let you down.

Relishing in the feel of your softness and you heart racing under your skin, fluttering so delicately under his lips, pressing his face against you was an instant mood lifter for him.

You loved it, a surprised but delighted laugh always ripping from your chest, almost subconsciously. You couldn't hide your happiness in his affections, not that you would want to (thats a lie, you cant help but be embarrassed at the end of the day by the intensive joy you felt whenever you looked at him). Which only seemed to motivate him even more, and soon each time he scooped you up, he'd kiss all over your tummy, making you giggle because it tickled, before hugging you close with a small sigh.

-

"I brought snacks, and some cuddles. So uhm, can I nap on you for a bit? 'M tired. Unless your busy or something..." you beam up at him, starting to hesitate toward the end, suddenly a little unsure.

"Pretty please?? I wont bug ya, I promise." You plead, pulling your best puppy dog eyes, shifting from one foot to the other nervously. His eyes widened as his brain processed what you said, and the cute sight in front of him. If he was being honest, it made his brain stop for a split second.

He chuckled at you and lifted you up by the back of your knees, holding you carefully to his chest, mindful of your full shirt. A small startled squeak coming from you as he did so, a sound he never got tired of hearing.

You glanced in the room as he closed to door, he had papers sprawled over the small coffee table in the middle of the room, and a few (you spotted more in the trash bin in the corner) empty food wrappers around his work space. He plopped down in front of the table again, taking only a few steps to reach it. You were kind of jealous, your short legs never being a fair match against his. Luckily he enjoyed carrying you, which solved that issue right quick.

"You can keep me company while I finish my homework." He says, shifting you into his lap and keeping a loose hold on your lower stomach, fingers splaying out to get a small feel of your exposed skin. Glancing around, you dont see belphies mop of hair in his bed, he was probably sleeping in the attic or the observatory, you quietly hum to yourself, abit happy to have Beel all to yourself for the moment. Shifting forward, Beels hands refusing to let you go and setting on your waist, you hold your shirt above the edge of the table, and let the snacks spill from your shirt before smoothing the garment back down, missing Beels frown as he looses sight of your tummy. Quickly moving to organize the snacks a bit, so that they were within reach and not scattered all over his papers and in the way.

"Thank you, your the bestest!!" You say, the dull ache in your arms more than worth the effort in your opinion.

You tilted your head back so you can look up at him. Making eye contact with him made your brain kinda just...mush. Your hands slowly squeezing his on your waist, lifting them so you move a bit.

You tore you gaze from his, before turning around and wrapping your arms around his nack and your legs around his torso,(like a koala in his opinion).

Scooting as close as you could get away with, (your not as stealthy as you give yourself credit for, he knows, he just too nice to tease you for it, and he doesn't want you to stop), so you could snuggle up to him and be comfy at the same time. Which wasn't all that hard to do with him, being the teddy bear he is.

Your eyes glazed over slightly, and you were distracted as you mind pulled your attention away.

Ah, you were in pure bliss, you could die happy like this~

You had grabbed plenty of snacks, being sure to vary in your choices, knowing Beel would like to have options, and hoping to be able to buy some extra time with him and a cute Beel smile as a reward for your effort. Tho, youd do it anyways.

Not that you'd ever admit to that. Nuh uh, no way. Unless he asked nicely, you'd give in embarrassingly fast if he ever did, the realization making your face heat up.

But...

Embarrassment be damned, youd never tell Beel 'No'.

He looks down at you, face going all blushy and soft at your slightly dazed and flushed expression. Your thoughts getting the best of you for a moment. Shaking your head slightly and letting out a resigned sigh.

"Of course you can," you snap out of it when he speaks up, looking up at him, quick to give him your full attention. "I love when you cuddle up with me, it helps me focus a bit. You didn't have to bribe me, though, as long as its you, my cuddles come free-" wrapping his arms around your shoulders, giving you a snug hug, he moves to continue. "Not that I'm complaining-" you cut him off, feeling slightly guilty about it. You were already flustered, and his sweet words weren't helping your predicament one bit. That was until your eyes actually focus on his face, oh sweet hell, hes so precious!!! Your heart thumps nearly painfully for a moment, nerves biting into your thoughts.

Your face was definitely beat red now, you could feel it at the tips of your ears even. Yet you refused to move, your eyes locked on his. A rare occurrence, one you could tell he was basking in, his eyes were glued to your face, studying it. His flush deepening slightly.

Squishing his cheeks and "shushing" him gently. Your basically cooing at him, to tired suddenly to care much about how your words or actions came off. The nervousness slipping away from your voice and movements. "Its not a bribe hun, I just felt like seeing you smile before I fell asleep on you. Heh, your smile is my goodluck charm for good dreams, ya know?" You tiredly rub his cheek with your thumb, eyes lit up happily and content. Giving him a small breathless laugh at the end.

He really did calm you down, your mind slowing down as the excitement started to fade, a fact you became overly aware of quite suddenly, your eyes feeling quite heavy now that you felt safe.

You yawned, your weariness catching up to you.

Beels quick to notice, taking note of the bags under your eyes. Dont worry, he'll make sure you get some good sleep, no bad dreams were gonna plague you on his watch. He glances over at the snacks you brought, unbelievably happy. Seeing you so cutely curled up to him, the fact that you brought him as much food as you could carry(a sight he nearly died from when he saw it) and your sweet sweet words, it definitely warmed his heart to say in the least.

He loved that you actually came to find him, just so you could cuddle. His adoration for you is bottomless, just like his hunger.

So, Beel wraps you inna big bear hug, pulling you closer and peppering the top of your head and face with kisses. He gives you a big grin, his eyes sparkling happily. "Nap, I'll wake you up when I'm done and we can hangout till dinner."

You tiredly nod, relaxing against him.

Grabbing a baggy of chips, he smooches your forehead, before tucking your face under his chin so he could munch, and see his work(not like that was much of an issue, beels a big boy after all👀), without completely covering the top of your head in crumbs (you'd told him you didn't mind, especially since he always ruffled your hair to get then out, and you loved that...but he still feels bad about it and tries to avoid it to some extent) and being able to rest his chin on top your head was just the cherry on top for him.

💗Happy beel mode activated💗

Sighing happily, you close your eyes. Beels cuddles making all your stress melt away, just like they always did. Slowly, you start to drift off, listening to the soft scratch of his pen as he starts to work and his deep breathing, letting it lull you into sleep.

I dont know why my brain wanted me to got all out on this. I literally jus couldn't stop tweaking with it. Imma post if before i decide to change it. Imma just conveniently forget i wrote this now, maybe ill like it more after a week or two... :/ also if theres any spelling or grammar issues plz tell me, its like 2am rn so im sure i missed something

[orange-waterfalls]

Hello, Nurse

Yancy x mute!gender neutral!reader

@glitchbitch69 ty for the prompt!

A/N: I heard that mute was an offensive word... but I didn't know what else to use... reader is a person who cannot talk. That's the best way I can put it. @glitchbitch69 I am 99% sure this is not what you asked for but here??? I did my best. Rated T for a couple "fuck"s and like... 2 "shit"s.

Word Count: 2.5k

--

Yancy enjoyed prison life. He loved his family, the food was good, the cells were comfortable, Shithole Hank's hooch wine was fucking wonderful, it was almost perfect.

Almost.

Apart from the fact that he wanted a companion

A spouse.

A life partner.

Whatever you want to call it.

One day, he notices someone new. Someone he hadn't seen before. Which was very weird because he knew everybody. They all practiced their musical number every Thursday.

He decides to introduce himself, so he follows you to wherever you're headed. You end up in the infirmary.

"Hello, there." He greets. You turn to him, slightly surprised. He's smiling at you, and not in a malicious way like you'd probably expect from a man who killed both of his parents. It's a sweet smile. A "I want you to feel as comfortable as possible" smile. You return it and wave.

"I haven't seen youse around here before. Youse new?" He asks. You nod. He raises an eyebrow

"Alright… what's youse's name?" You gently tap the name card on your chest.

"Hm. What's youse's favorite color?"

You point to your shoes.

"What's youse's favorite animal?"

You point to the animal poster on your wall.

"What's youse's favorite season?"

You point to the background of your computer. He huffs.

"What, can't youse talk?" He jokes. You shake your head.

"Oh…" he clears his throat, suddenly feeling very awkward. You make a gesture with your hands. He furrows his eyebrows. You huff and grab a Post-It note, writing something down and handing it to him. He looks at it and sees that you wrote "it's okay". He chuckles.

"Must be hard being a nurse and not being able to communicate with your patients," he comments. You roll your eyes, and wave it off. You write something else on a Post-It and hand it to him. "I can handle it" He smiles.

"Yeah, I bet." He glances back up at you. "So, uh… do--" he was cut off by two guards bursting into the infirmary with a man of a gurney. You rush past Yancy to see what's happening. Yancy follows you to see who it is. You make another gesture at the guards.

"He collapsed while in his cell. He won't wake up," one explains. You grab Yancy by the arm and lead him out, closing the door. He stands there for a moment before deciding it'd be best to head to his cell. He runs into Sparkles McGee on the way there.

"Hey, Yance!" He greets. Yancy smiles at him.

"Hey," He responds and they start to walk together

"Where ya headed?" Sparkles asks.

"Y'know… to my cell…"

"Already? It's only 7:00…"

"Well, I'm tired…"

"Hm… alright…"

"Hey…" Yancy stops walking. Sparkles, who was in front, turns to him, tilting his head. "Do you… know about any nurse?"

"You mean Y/N? Oh, yeah, they've been here for a couple of days," Sparkles responds.

"Really? How come I didn't know?"

"Well, you didn't really have a reason to. You don't get into a lot of fights and you don't get hurt so…"

"So… if I wanted to see the nurse… I'd have to get hurt…"

"Well, I wouldn't say you have to. You could just… talk to them?" Sparkles looks at Yancy weirdly. Yancy apparently did not hear that last sentence because the dumbass immediately went off to find a way to get hurt. He could get Jimmy the Pickle to punch him… that seemed like a solid plan. Yeah. He'll do that. He sits on his bed and thinks about what he's gonna say when he sees you again.

"Hey there!" No, too excited… "Howdy!" No, too awkward… "Sup" Nah, too "I want to be cool so you don't leave me". Just a simple "Hey" that's it. He sighs and lies down. He closes his eyes, letting sleep overtake him.

--

The next day, during breakfast, he sees you. He waves to you, but you don't see him. He figures that's a good time to start his plan.

"Hey, uh… I gotta do somethin'... See you guys later," he slides the rest of his breakfast over to Tiny, who promptly devours it. He meets Jimmy in a hallway.

"You got the stuff?" Jimmy asks. Yancy nods. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small lavender candle. Jimmy takes it, putting it into his pocket.

"Now it's your turn. Don't do it too-" Jimmy just straight decks him. He does miss his nose, but he nearly dislocates the smaller man's jaw.

--

Yancy wakes up and opens his eyes, but quickly closes them again due to the bright light in front of his face. He slowly opens them again, allowing himself to adjust to the light. He turned his head slightly, eyes widening when he sees you scribbling on a clipboard. He begins to smile, but stops because it hurts. He reaches up to feel his cheek. Jimmy really did a number on him…

You glance at him, noticing he's awake. You set down your clipboard and pencil and walk over to him, smiling gently. He gives you a half-grin in return.

"Hey there, hot stuff," he says, voice slightly cracking. Damn, I fucked it up, he thinks. You snort and pick up a sheet of paper, along with the clipboard. You write something down and hand it to him. It seems to be a little quiz.

"On a scale from 1-10, how much does it hurt?

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10"

He gently touches his cheek, wincing at the coldness of his fingers. He circles the number "4" and hands the paper back to you. You look at his answer and nod. You go get some supplies to give him a checkup and make sure everything else is ok.

As you perform the tests, you can clearly see his cheeks turning a light shade of pink whenever you touch him. A couple minutes pass, and you finish your check-up. Apart from a few slow reactions, he seems fine. They're probably because he was punched unconscious. You walk over to put your items away. He exhales deeply.

"So… uh…" he starts. You turn to him. "...do anything fun recently?" You roll your eyes and turn away. He pouts and crosses his arms. "Oh, come on! I'm doin' my best here!" You smack your lips and turn to him fully, making sure to obviously shake your head. He scoffs and mumbles something under his breath. You continue putting away supplies. When you turn back to him, he looks a bit upset. You frown, suddenly feeling guilty. You grab the same sheet of paper as before and jot down a couple of questions. You fold the paper, slipping it into his hand as you escort him out of the infirmary.

Yancy heads back to his cell and sits down, feeling gloomy. He takes the paper you gave him and opens it. It's seems like a little quiz. And the bottom, you wrote "I'd like to know you better, so here" and a small heart next to it. Yancy smiles widely and starts filling in answers.

You two write letters to each other back and forth, since you were usually busy in the infirmary. You learned a lot about him. He killed his parents and that's why he was in jail. That should have thrown you off waaaaay more than it did. You learned that him and all the other prisoners wrote a song and performed for new inmates. The practice was on Thursdays. You occasionally go and watch if you're not busy. The first time you went, he saw you out of the corner of his eye and smiled to himself while trying to get the newest inmate to stop fucking up the dance routine.

You two start to fall for each other.

For you, it was almost instant. You saw him singing and dancing and your heart just sped up.

For him, it took a bit. He was hesitant to trust you since you worked at the prison. He thought maybe you were only being nice so he wouldn't kill you. Which he would never, but you didn't know that. It bummed him out, until you covered for him when he got into a fight. You let Mr. Murder-Slaughter know that he had fallen , not gotten into a fight. For some reason, he took your word for it. Said you "looked trustworthy". That was about the time Yancy actually fell for you. Not a crush, no. This soft prison boy loves you with all his heart. That was a couple nights ago. You two had sent more letters since then.

He's reading the newest one in bed while he's supposed to be sleeping, giggling like a schoolgirl. He clutches the paper to his chest and sighs contently. He wipes his forehead, feeling a bit warm, but he ignores it. He would write you a new letter in the morning.

--

He wakes up in the morning, feeling like absolute shit. He tries to sit up, but his brain spins and screams at him to lie the hell back down. He obliges, only to suddenly go into a coughing fit. His body racks with the force, and he feels like his lungs are filled with something other than air. A guard enters his cell.

"Hey, you ok?" He asks. Yancy tries to answer, but goes into another fit and falls off of the bed. The guard rushes over to him.

"Whoa, ok… we gotta get you to the infirmary… c'mon," the guard tries to help Yancy to his feet, but his legs won't let him put any weight onto them. He groans as his head pounds, begging to lay back down. The guard manages to drag him to the infirmary, where he's plopped onto a bed. You turn, wondering what the commotion is. You gasp at the sight of Yancy. You make hand gestures at the guard. Yancy had been studying up on sign language, so he understood that you were saying "what's wrong?". The guard begins explaining what happened as Yancy begins to close his eyes. He lets himself slip out of consciousness.

--

He wakes back up to the smell of food. Chicken noodle soup? He hadn't eaten that since he was 11. He slowly turns to the side and sees a steaming bowl next to him, along with a small bottle of Gatorade. He looks around the room, searching for you. He sees you behind you computer. He tries to say "hi", but his body decides to say "fuck you" and make him hack his lungs out. You perk up at the sound, quickly walking over to him holding a whiteboard. You take a marker and write down "how do you feel?"

"Like… shit…" he croaks out. You smile sympathetically and write something else, showing to him.

It says "I convinced Mr. Murder-Slaughter to let me make you chicken noodle soup. I hope you like it. You might want to wait until it's cooled. I also bribed a guard into sneaking me Gatorade." He nods as you grab some objects and sit next to him.

You open your mouth, hoping he gets the memo. It takes him a moment, but he understands. You push his tongue with a stick and search his throat. What for, he has no clue. You eventually take it out and pick up a thermometer. He takes it in his mouth. You both sit quietly for a moment, waiting for it to go off. Yancy takes this opportunity to try and memorize every detail of your face. Were your eyes always so sparkly? He began to think he was hallucinating. The thermometer beeps, and you remove it from his mouth. You frown.

"What? Bad?" He asks. You turn the thermometer towards him so he can see the temperature. 108. "Oh… bad…" you shake your head and get an ice pack from a freezer, laying it on his head as you perform more tests. Once your done, he starts eating the soup, joyfully. It's all gone in the span of 30 seconds, along with the Gatorade. You blink at him before he crosses his arms and turns away.

"'s not my fault youse made it so good…" he grumbles. You smile, sitting next to him.

He turns back to you, a small grin appearing on his face. You two stare at each other for a moment before he reaches out, putting his hand on your neck. You glance at his hand, wondering what he's doing. He leans in. You lean in as well out of instinct. He closes his eyes because you're right there! You begin to close your eyes before you scramble to your feet, stepping away from him. He holds his hand in the air, a bit startled with your sudden disappearance. You stand and look at him, breathing harshly. Yancy groans and covers his face with his hands.

"Oh, I'm so stupid. Of course you don't like me," he says. "Why would you? I'm a scumbag…" you shake your head, immediately feeling regret for how you acted. You frantically look for your whiteboard. When you find it, you write something down and tap Yancy on the shoulder. He looks at you, tears brimming in the corners of his eyes. You hold the whiteboard in front of him. It says "108". He looks at the board, then at you, wondering what it means. You stare at him, expecting him to catch on at some point. He doesn't. You roll your eyes. You point at the board, then at him. He knits his eyebrows together in thought, before raising them and gasping.

"OOOOH, IT'S BECAUSE I'M SICK!" He yells. You nod forcefully. "Wait… so, you do like me?" He asks. You smile and nod. His face darkens. "O-Oh… well, uh… I like you too?" You erase the whiteboard and write "I know". He chuckles as you continue to smile.

--

A little while later, you deem Yancy ready to go back in his cell. He gets slightly upset because he liked spending so much time with you, but he was so glad he wasn't sick anymore. It's a bit late when you lead him back, so he decides to go to bed. He crawls in, covering himself in the blanket and you start to leave.

"Goodnight!" He calls. You smile and wave at him. He snuggles in and closes his eyes. He suddenly feels his shoulder being shaken as he tries to sleep. He turns to whoever's bothering him and almost decks you in the face. "Wha-" he starts. He's cut off by you leaning forward and gently kissing him on the forehead. He plops back down and gazes at you loving. You softly pat his chest as you start to leave again. You pause and turn back towards him, making a gesture with your hands. He doesn't know much sign language, but he does know what this means.

"I love you".

He smiles and makes the gesture back to you, making you smile. You turn and head back to the infirmary. Yancy sighs happily as he falls asleep.

--

The next morning, he meets you near the infirmary. He's about to say hi, but you frown, holding your arm up to your face. He stops, not knowing what's going on.

You sneeze.

You slowly turn to him, glaring. He nervously chuckles.

"Uh… sorry?"