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moriihana · 2 years ago

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we can't fix each other but we sure as hell can enable each other instead || eleven: i'm bad at mariokart but at least shigaraki is worse

pairing: dabi x disabled!gn!reader

overview: you meet dabi pre-canon because your cat, nugget, literally won’t leave the guy alone. friendship, fluff and (eventual) angst ensue.

chapter summary: you and shigaraki play some mariokart, then you guys fuck up overhaul bc he's a piece of shit and i hate him

content: angst and fluff

warnings: you scratch at your throat as an anxious habit (picked up from shig)

word count: 1749

a/n: shamelessly self-promoting MORE art i did of my self-insert but there's nugget and boo this time (i have no clue how to draw animals). also, idk how this reads bc basing things off of the actual episodes is real fuckin hard so if anyone has any feedback i'm happy to hear! also² i projected the fact i'm really bad at mariokart into this. bc uhhhhhh. im really bad at mariokart LMAOOO

*previously known as “we can’t fix each other (but we can heal our wounds together)”; i changed the title bc these assholes aint healin shit they’re just being overall menaces

taglist: @iincandescenttt

AO3 link

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“You think they’re okay?” You itched the front of your throat anxiously. “It’s been days and we haven’t heard from them.”

“Stop that,” Shigaraki snapped and paused the round of MarioKart, eyeing the blood welling up under your skin. “You always get on my ass about it, you don’t get to do it either.”

“Picked it up from you, dick,” you grumbled under your breath, but dropped your hand anyways. “But do you? Think they’re okay?”

“Whatever. They’re fine. Overhaul has probably limited their communication since we’re technically wanted criminals. Can we get back to the game now?” He huffed, scowling.

“I thought you didn’t like MarioKart and were only playing because I wanted to. I’d think you would be happy to take a break.” You shrugged.

“We’re not only playing it because you wanted to—” Shigaraki narrowed his eyes when you grinned at his arguing. “—and anyways, it’s better than listening to you yap about. I think Dabi’s even gotten tired of listening to your anxious rambling, which is probably why he hasn’t been putting up a fuss over us playing games.”

“Actually, I think that’s because I threatened to chop his dick off,” you snickered.

“You… threatened to chop his dick off,” Shigaraki deadpanned. “Why on earth did you do that.”

“I called you by Tomura in front of him and he got all pissy. I explained you’re my best friend and gave me permission to call you Tomura, and told him no dick measuring contests—otherwise he’d find he has no dick to measure.”

“And I thought you were less insane than the rest of them, but it’s pretty fucking crazy to threaten a man’s dick. Especially Dabi’s. ”

You barked out a laugh. “Insane or not, pretty boy wouldn’t actually do anything to hurt me. One time he accidentally burnt me and apologised for days afterwards. And he never apologises.”

“Tch.” He shook his head. “If you’re not gonna play, go bother someone else. I’m getting tired of MarioKart anyways.”

“Yeah, yeah, grumpypants.” You grabbed your cane and heaved yourself off the floor, sticking your tongue out at him. You made your way down the hall and into your room, waving to Dabi.

He looked up from his spot on the bed as you walked in, raising his eyebrows. “He kick you out?”

“Ehh, pretty much.” You stopped to scratch Boo behind the ears and give Nugget a quick pet, then plopped down next to him with a groan. “That, and I think his pride can only take so many beatings. Apparently, he’s absolute dogshit at MarioKart. Fighting games and MMOs are more his style.”

He snorted, “Why doesn’t that surprise me. He seems like the type of person to enjoy murdery games over anything else.”

“Oh, definitely.” You grinned. “I think it’s worth noting I’m awful at MarioKart. So the fact I was winning means he was really awful. ”

“I know, doll. I beat you twenty times before you gave up.”

“Don’t remind me of that!” You whined, throwing your hands into the air. “I’ve never had my ass kicked so terribly.”

“You forget I played a lot of games with Natsu. I got real damn good at shit like that.” Dabi shrugged, mischief in his eyes.

“Still sucked.” You pouted, crossing your arms. “You could’ve gone easy on me after the first ten times! You didn’t have to keep kicking my ass!”

“Ya think I’d go easy on you, doll? We both know I’ve never been the one to go easy.” A smirk pulled at his staples. “Especially on you.”

“Oh, shut it,” you grumbled, swatting at him. “You’re so annoying.”

“And yet you still put up with me.”

“I literally couldn’t get rid of you if I tried. Not that I want to, anyways. You’re stuck with me just as much as I’m stuck with you, pretty boy.” You looked away from him when Shigaraki poked his head through the door. “What’s up, Shig?”

“Toga called. Time to go.”

You grinned, a gleam in your eyes. “Oh hell yeah.”

“Spinner, you are horrible at driving!” You yelped, hanging onto Compress’s free arm for dear life as Dabi pushed the truck doors open.

“In shogi, the point is to get the king, right?” Shigaraki spoke from atop the truck, his fingers interlocked.

“How the fuck have you not fallen off, dude?!” Your voice was sharp with anxiety.

“It’s not that simple,” Dabi drawled in response as he looked up at your leader.

“Yeah, they’re here, just like you said! To get from the Hassaikai to the nearest villain hospital, it’s fastest to use this highway. Thanks for letting us know! Toga, you’re so efficient. I’m much obliged,” Compress hummed gratefully.

“Good job Toga! Put her on speaker, Compress!” You leaned close to Compress’s phone, speaking loudly. He snorted and gently pushed you away, but put Toga on speaker nonetheless.

“Jin-kun’s the one who told me to call—”

“—fight!”

“—I was too busy watching Izuku!”

“Run away!”

“In fact, I’m sorry to make you get your hands dirty.”

“I only have one hand, though,” Compress mused playfully. Toga’s laugh chimed through the phone.

“We couldn’t get the girl who’s the crux of their plan, but we think the finished products are where you are. We watched the police’s movements for a while, so there’s a high probability. Even if they aren’t there…”

“—kill them—”

“...we want to say hi, right?”

Compress hummed as Toga hung up. “Sounds like Twice is having a rough go of it.”

“Yeah... they did good, though. I’m proud of both of them,” you said with a smile.

“Hey, lizard! Stop weaving!” Dabi snapped over his shoulder. “I get motion sick!”

“Don’t call me “lizard”! I’m Spinner!”

“What are you getting mad for? Shut up!” Dabi huffed, then gave you a look as you giggled. “Stop your laughing. It’s not funny.”

“You get motion sick?” You grinned at him, ignoring the glare you got in response.

“Is attacking the police really following the will of Stain, who wanted a true hero society? I’m not sure about that!”

“It’s a necessary sacrifice, Spinner. I’m counting on you to drive,” Shigaraki sighed, moving into a crouching position.

“And don’t fling us out of the back, please!” You added. “I don’t want to die just yet!”

Dabi rolled his eyes, then ignited his palm. “Now…” He grinned, and sent out a tunnel of flames. His grin faded when something stopped the fire from hitting the police cars. “What’s with him?”

“A hero! Of course there’d be one. Ugh!” Shigaraki’s voice was almost a whine. You had to suppress a teasing remark at that. “Spinner, slow down!” As the truck slowed enough to get closer to the police car, Shigaraki jumped down—then was hit in the face with a bunch of sand. The hero began to ramble on about Shigaraki's decay.

“He’s famous, huh?” Dabi sighed, putting his hands in his pockets. You patted him on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry, pretty boy. You’re just as scary as him.”

“Shigaraki is the misdirection; in other words, the decoy. Let’s go.” Compress flicked out a marble, which decompressed into a large piece of rubble. “Police car gently levitating! No trickery or devices involved.”

You snickered, then clambered onto Dabi’s back before he and Compress jumped out of the back of the truck. You hopped off and watched Dabi approach the hero that had pulled the policeman out of the transport vehicle Shigaraki caused to crash. He ignited his forearms as he loomed over the hero, a menacing smile on his face.

“That’s right. Heroes end up prioritising lives.”

“Recently, burnt corpses have been turning up one after another in various places.” The hero lowered the policeman onto the ground.

“Oh, are people talking about me? That makes me happy,” Dabi said, voice mocking.

“Told you, pretty boy! Just as scary!” You called. Compress nudged you, shaking his head in amusement. Your playfulness turned into a scowl when you heard what the hero said next, your grip on your cane tightening.

“Have you ever thought about the feelings of those they left behind?!”

You have no idea, hero. You have no idea.

While Compress and Dabi dealt with the hero, you walked over to Shigaraki, who was standing by Overhaul’s gurney. He nodded in acknowledgement, then turned his attention back to the former yakuza.

“Who’s going to be the next leader again?” Shigaraki tilted his head, hands in his pockets.

“Did you come to kill me?” Overhaul ignored his question. His voice was resigned, devoid of emotion.

“No. I thought of what you’d hate the most. I hate you.” Shigaraki took Father off his face as Compress approached. “You’re too full of yourself.”

“Me too.” Compress removed his mask, smirking. He used a marble to take one of Overhaul’s arms.

“Oh, nice.” You grinned, nudging Compress. “I didn’t think of that.”

“There are two boxes here. Which is the finished product?” Shigaraki opened the box as he spoke. “Oh, well.”

Overhaul’s eyes widened in panic as his face twisted up in a sour expression. “Give it back.”

“You know what, Overhaul? A person who erases people’s Quirks shouldn’t depend on their own Quirk, right?” Shigaraki leaned down and gripped Overhaul’s remaining arm. You watched as the Decay began to spread upwards, your eyes lighting up in twisted satisfaction. “If I don’t cut it off, your whole body will turn to dust.” Shigaraki lifted up a knife, then paused and turned to you, raising his eyebrows in an unspoken question.

Your grin grew wider, and you took the knife. “Don’t mind if I do.” You swung the knife down, severing his forearm from his elbow.

“All right, now you’re a powerless, helpless, Quirkless man,” Shigaraki leered, a manic look on his face. “And the fruits of all that effort you spent are now mine! Now you won’t even have a finger to put in your mouth as you look on enviously at the rest of us! Let’s do our best!”

You giggled as hives spread across Overhaul’s skin, “What a pity! You shouldn’t have killed our friend and taken Compress’s arm.”

Spinner honked the horn of the truck. “Pursuers are coming! Hurry up and get in!” He shouted out the window.

Shigaraki straightened, placed Father back onto his face, and walked back to Spinner. “Next, it’s our turn.”

You trailed after him with a pleased hum. “Revenge feels nice.” Your joy and satisfaction grew exponentially as Overhaul screamed behind you. “It feels real fuckin’ nice.”

#dabi x reader #dabi x you #todoroki touya x reader #todoroki touya x you #touya todoroki x reader #touya todoroki x you #todoroki toya x reader #todoroki toya x you #toya todoroki x reader #toya todoroki x you #my writing #bnha fanfiction #navi: we cant fix each other #writing.txt

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junko-and-riri-domain · 4 years ago

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push and pulls | ot7

↬ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ot7 x reader ↬ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: fluff | requested | headcannon (paragraph form) ↬ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: none ↬ ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ: anon ↬ ʀᴇQᴜᴇꜱᴛ ᴡᴀs: “cat and dog relationship with classmate!enhypen ? hehe headcannon or any format that you're comfy with :3 they could be highschool sweethearts in the end too 😭” ↬ ᴀ/ɴ:

i tried i'm sorry if this sucks 🤧

jake and jay’s are are like semi-suggestive (i think?) imma just say that they are semi-suggestive to be safe

i aint gonna lie i’m a sucker for Jay cooking 😪

jake & hoon’s are kinda short bc it’s like 1 am rn

Heeseung

Heeseung has always been good at everything no matter what it is. It isn’t to discredit any of his effort whatsoever, but as the school year continues everyone knows that things are just natural for Heeseung. Ever since your freshman year of high school, you’ve seen him as your main competition for 1st place in school. The problem? This man isn’t even aware of it. To you, he just breathes and wins the competitions, gets all the attention, and is at the top of everything. To him, it’s the only way you’ll even notice him. The competitions? It gives him a chance to stay after school to be with you. The attention? He’s only focused on yours. Him at the top of everything? Well, that one’s just because he’s Lee Heeseung. It’s after school one day and the both of you have stayed to help clean up the classes for extra credit. Like a thief with a bagful of stolen glances, his eyes drift to you whenever you don’t notice. Except for this one time.

“Stop looking at me!” you say, your eyes glaring at him. He’s taken aback as he never meant to offend you.

“Sorry,” he said, thinking that you’d just leave it at that. But instead,

“I know you’re fricking judging me Lee Heeseung.”

“What?”

“I can feel it in your eyes. I’ll always be second to you and I get it, you don’t need to rub it in, so just stop!” You throw the rag at the window, walking out of the classroom and he’s left alone wondering what the hell just happened. And suddenly the gap between first place and second begins to grow. To him, staying after school to study for competitions are no longer fun when you won’t even tell him to be quiet when he starts to sing. Your attention is gone just like his sanity. Being at the top never felt so lonely when you weren’t next to him. To you, staying after school becomes something you dread because of the silence in the room that you caused. Your attention seems as if it’s on everything but him but every day you have a hundred thoughts and all of them are infected with him. The two of you enter yet another school competition, making it to the top 3. Yet, unlike previous times, neither of you is in first place.

“In first place, we have Sim Jaeyun!” the announcer says. You and Heeseung look at each other in shock that the other wasn’t on the podium. Yet, you couldn’t care less. Because not getting first place causes you to go off on a rant that Heeseung joins in on. Staying after school turns into study partners at the nearby cafe which becomes study dates. Both of your attention is openly on the other. And while you’re both at the top academically, you become the couple goals everyone wishes they could achieve.

“ace of my heart 💞” you caption an Instagram post of a picture of Heeseung.

rest of the boys under the cut!

Jay

Culinary class is peaceful for Jay. He has control of everything, knows where the ingredients and cooking tools are, can do something he loves, and did we mention control of everything? As a chef, he learned what you were like the first few weeks of class. You were messy with apple peels next to the lime squeezer, engaging in a way of cooking that you defined as “organized chaos.” You didn’t use measurements, cooked things by eye, and used whatever seasonings felt right. It wasn’t that you were bad at cooking, he actually enjoyed your dishes. But your process was just something he couldn’t stand. And maybe he doesn’t really like you since you accidentally used the last of his honey when making cupcakes but that’s a story for another day. The culinary teacher decided to try something new to promote teamwork and for a week, the class would be in partners and cooking a dish new to both people. And who did Jay just have to end up with? You. As the two of you read the recipe for your first dish which was a dessert of sorts,

“What do you wanna use first, jackfruit or durian?” he asked. You looked up at him, a teasing smile on your lips,

“Durian, because it looks like you,” you said before making your way to the table where all the ingredients were.

“Inner peace,” he muttered to himself as he watched you walk off. The next day, you were making peach tarts.

“Yah, Jay, look here,” you said as you held up your phone and the peach. In the photo you took, the peach was next to Jay’s face, sort of comparing the two.

“Why’d you take a picture of me?” he asked. He didn’t really mind photos, knowing full well how good he looked but you taking one of him came completely out of the blue. As you glanced up from your phone after hitting post, you were unable to stop your laugh,

“Your hair looks like a peach,” you said with a wink as you went back to cutting the ingredients.

“Do I just, do I just look like food now?” he muttered to himself with a huff.

“I mean… I wouldn’t mind eating you,” you teased. You were smooth, he’d give you that. But, damn, he wanted to make you feel the way you were making him feel right now.

It didn’t take long for you to learn that Jay’s way of teasing made you flustered as hell. If you’d ask him to hand you something, he’d hold it above your head forcing you to have to jump up. It just so happened that he did this once right in front of someone else’s station and as you jumped, you almost knocked into them which led to his arm around you,

“Watch where you’re going,” he warned with a teasing edge as he handed you the carrots.

When you handed him something, he’d take it in a way that his hand held yours for a second but that second was enough. As the two of you cooked together, you entered your own world with no one else but the other in it. He was patient with your organized chaos, his own habits finding a place alongside your cooking routine. For the last day of working as partners, you two were to bake cookies. You put in a pinch of salt then some sugar when suddenly,

“YAH!” you hear from next to you. Met with Jay’s wide eyes as he looked in the bowl where you put the salt and sugar,

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

“I told you to taste the salt and sugar before you used it.”

“The first one tasted like salt so I put more of the second one.” He took a pinch of the sugar already in the mixing bowl then tasted it, a disgusted look appearing on his face”

“You put salt then more salt, good job y/n.”

“Huh?” He took another pinch then brought it up to your lips and as you tasted it,

“Why the hell is there two kinds of salt here!”

“One’s fine, the other’s coarse. I wanted to eat these y’know.”

“Fine, head over to my place after school and we can make cookies together.”

“That’s not funny. You can’t mess with cookies,” he muttered.

“Who said I was joking? We can even drizzle honey over it.”

Jake

Perfection doesn’t even begin to describe Sim Jaeyun. A gentleman, kind, smart, has an accent that you can’t help but sometimes tease him about, and obsessed with Layla were all things you couldn’t fault him for. But sometimes, just sometimes, he could be a little too nice. You couldn’t help but feel jealous at the sight of the girl chatting with Jake by the benches and her feeling his arm up.

“Geez, tell her to go away!” you wanted to say to him as you started walking towards them.

“Hey,” Jake said with a smile as his eyes landed on you. The same smile he smiled at her with.

“Are you ready to go?” you asked, trying not to sound pissed but couldn’t help yourself.

“Yeah hold up.” Jake looked at the girl, “Just text if you need help with anything else on the homework,” he said before walking off with you.

“Who was that?” you asked as the two of you made your way to the cafeteria.

“New girl, needs help with physics so she asked me for help.” Jake was supposed to help you with physics.

“You gonna help her on Tuesdays?” you asked, referring to the day Jake always helped you. If he did notice your jealousy, he didn’t say anything about it. Oh, but he did notice. And he kind of wanted to edge it on to see how far things would go.

“Should I? She can hangout with me and Layla.”

“See if she likes me better than Layla.”

“Might take you up on the offer, watch your words, y/n,” he said with a chuckle.

“Yeah? You introduce her to Layla and I’ll divorce you then take full custody.”

“I didn’t know we were married, don’t we gotta go out on a date first?”

“I don’t know, do we?”

“Let’s do it right now then.”

“Fine! Wait what-?”

Sunghoon

On the ice, you and Sunghoon went together like sugar and tea. Off the ice, you two were like the coarse salt that ruined the cookies in Jay’s fic. You and Sunghoon skated well together, putting on a performance that typically got you first place, but that’s exactly what it was. A performance. An act. Nothing more, nothing less. Neither of you talked when you saw each other after practice the next day at school. Neither of you actively told anyone that you knew each other more than most couples did. But there was just something about talking to Sunghoon outside of ice skating, acknowledging that there you had an ice skating persona as well as the persona you showed to everyone else, that frightened you. So both of you made an unspoken agreement that you’d keep your ice skater lives in the rink and outside of it. Except for right now where the transfer student who coincidentally just so happened to be an ice skater and was wondering if you’d be his partner for the upcoming showcase.

“Y/n already has a partner,” Sunghoon said, cutting in as he stood next to you. The transfer student’s eyes settled on Sunghoon,

“You’re Park Sunghoon, the guy who-”

“Almost made it into the Olympics? Yeah. And y/n and I are gonna do it together this year.” You weren’t quite sure how to feel about Sunghoon suddenly “claiming” you (not in a toxic way whatsoever, we don’t condone that here). But you did know that this meant Sunghoon knew of your existence outside of the rink.

“Says who?” you said, trying to see how this would go. He looked at you, fear flashing in his eyes at the thought of the two of you not doing this together.

“I thought, I thought we were? Are we not? We have our outfits planned and everything.”

“I mean… plans change, Hoon.” That nickname, the one only you were allowed to use for him.

“Do you not wanna do it together?”

“I’m just gonna… go,” the transfer student said.

“I do wanna do it together.”

“So then what’s the problem?”

“We kinda don’t have a relationship outside of the rink, Hoon.”

“We can make one, then. Right now.”

“Right now?”

“Right now.”

Sunoo

You’ve always held a level of jealousy towards Sunoo. Sunoo has always been the guy who’s everyone’s friend even if he’s popular, the type of guy who waves at everyone, greets them with a smile on their face, and gets people to attend class/school events. Whereas you’re more on the introverted side, not really liking people. When it’s lunchtime, you tend to eat alone not really giving a damn about everyone else. You’re not exactly an outcast, just more comfortable by yourself. You’ve always been jealous of how Sunoo’s open to people, talkative, and just overall likable. Because unlike him, people think you’re being mean when you’re quiet and it looks like you’re not listening to whatever it is they’re saying. Around school, Sunoo has earned the nickname Sunny while you’ve been given the nickname Winter. Everyone sees how you walk away whenever Sunoo waves at you in the halls. Everyone is aware of how you scoff whenever Sunoo does aegyo in front of you. Everyone notices how you get mad whenever he links his arm with yours. But it’s Sunoo who sees the glint in your eyes the second they meet his by your locker. It’s Sunoo who notices the slight smile that plays at the corner of your lips whenever he calls himself “ddeonu.” And it’s Sunoo who’s aware that no matter how much you protest when your arms link, you’re never the one to let go first. So he sits at the desk in front of yours during lunch, chatting his butt off about his day while stealing bites of your lunch. He gives you face masks with the excuse of “it was a buy one get one free deal and I don’t know who else to give it to.” He asks if he can style your hair playing it off as “practice.” Little by little, you begin to open up. When you see him in the halls, you start to give him a smile reserved only for him. When he does aegyo you tease him by saying that Jake does it better. And when he links his arms with yours, your pinkies intertwine. You bring an extra bag of chips for lunch and start making your portions larger to share with him. You invite him to the mall since you saw an online promo while walking by. You start to enjoy the way he plays with your hair, sometimes even craving his touch. Because we all know, the sun has its way of melting ice.

Jungwon

Yang Jungwon, the class president, has a 100% success rate in getting field trip forms submitted on time. Well, it would be 100% if it weren’t for you. It seems as if you’ve made it your life’s mission to do everything and anything that’ll piss off Jungwon. Every time there’s a permission slip that needs to get signed, he constantly finds himself having to remind you of it so that it’d get turned in on time. Yet despite this, you always turn it in a day later. When things are kind of slow in class, you’re always talking to someone and have earned the title of the chatty kid no matter where the teacher makes you sit. Jungwon has no clue how someone as big of a procrastinator as you, always chatting with people when you don’t need to, and has your music playing so loud that everyone else hears, gets the good grades that you do. But regardless of what you do, you don’t bring down the class average so he’ll give you that. It’s time for a new seating arrangement and where does the teacher have you sit? Right next to him. So he’s dreading it, knowing that for the next 2 weeks he won’t get any work done, have to deal with you chatting to everyone, and has to be the one to catch you up when you enter class late.

“Hey,” you say with a smile as you settle in the seat next to his. He likes your smile, he won’t lie. But you’re annoying as hell. One week goes by as a back and forth of you constantly making efforts to get on Jungwon’s nerves but he returns the favor while teasing you back. With the two of you as partners, he starts to notice some things about you. Things like how you play with your thumb before raising your hand to answer the question. He sees that your notes are full of rushed scribbles and you dot your i’s close to the center but not just there. Your binder is covered with artwork of things you like and photos of you and your friends. Amidst your chattiness and tardiness, he finds himself looking forwards to certain things. He looks forward to your messy hair as you rush in 15 minutes late and start scribbling your notes in an effort to catch up. He looks forwards to how your conversations become a distraction from lectures. And he wonders to himself, what it’d be like if he were a photo in your binder.

As the second week continues, you start to see things differently with Jungwon. His reminders become less annoying and more useful as you take it in mind. When you’re late, he already has a second copy of the notes waiting for you on your desk. He buys you stickers for your binder using the excuse of “I stole it from my sister.” Before either of you realize it, it’s time for a new seating chart.

“Guess you’re happy to get rid of me, Wonie,” you joke as the two of you stood up to head to your new seats.

“I want you to sit across from me,” you hear him say.

“Huh?”

“At the Eggy Cafe on our first date,” he says before heading to his new seat.

Ni-ki

Dance class, it’s exhausting. Countless hours spent practicing a choreography that only lasts for a few minutes. Constantly getting yelled at by your teacher when you take a wrong step. Continuously in an unspoken competition with the best dancer of the school, Nishimura Riki. Ni-ki fools around during practices, usually to get on your nerves. Whenever you buy bungeoppang at the stall in front of the school, half of it instantly belongs to Ni-ki as he takes a bite when you’re not looking. Whenever the two of you are the only ones who’ve got the choreography down, sometimes you’ll slow things down to piss him off. There’s a flow to Ni-kis dances that no one else can replicate, a flow he was born with and can never be taught. Everyone, including him, is aware of this. But you’ve always been different from everyone else. All his life, he’s been told how good at dancing he is but you criticize him. While the others applaud his performance, your eyes are watching his every move. He almost hates how well you can spot the mistakes he can’t even see on himself. But as time goes on, these little competitions start to develop between you two, even outside of dance. When dance class ends, the two of you race to see who’ll get to the bungeoppang stall first. Last one there pays for bungeoppang. This is the competition you let Ni-ki win, using “I’m already tired from dancing” as an excuse. In the mornings, you compete to get to first period. Loser pays for lunch. This is the competition where there’s a middle ground between you two. Sometimes you win, sometimes he wins, other times you enter class together. When walking home, you compete to get to the bottom of the stairs at the subway station first. Whoever loses has to carry the other’s bag until you get home. Ni-ki lets you win this one, using “If I ran any faster I’d trip,” as an excuse. These small competitions become the things you look forward to throughout the week, enjoying the thrill of small moments with Ni-ki. At one point, the two of you (on separate occasions) talked to Jungwon about the competitions, telling your side. To the both of you, he says the same thing. “Why don’t you see who asks the other out first and plans the better date?”

❦ written by riri (@enhykkul) | blog masterlist

requests are currently open! rules can be found here | anon emojis

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weaselbeaselpants · 4 years ago

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The virgin Hazbin vs. The Chad Helluva

((hey is the “virgin vs. CHAD” meme associated with alt right or anything iffy guys I’m kinda worried it is. PM me please))

This is long. Also read my earlier post for context.

Earlier this month I was chatting it up with a friend about how Viv gets heat for her material stuff while other purposefully “edgy” or “problematic” writers get a pass. The convo made me realize another important note about why I prefer Helluva to Hazbin and that’s it’s approach to it’s own themes and humor:

There’s a spectrum of pure shock/schlock humor to biting, meaningful satire. South Park, Drawn Together, Panty and Stocking and anything by Brandon Rogers is on the schlock end. Bojack Horseman, King of the Hill and Aggretsuko are on the black-comedy-satire end. In the middle are Rick and Morty, Kill la Kill and Venture Bros, where the humor can be either basic and cruel or strive for something more.

The schlockiest of schlock still have their followings who are in on humor that’s, first and foremost, out to get under your skin and even makes fun of them. When these works are “progressive” it’s usually just through sheer representation of a minority, and if they DO strive for a message, it’s little more than a much needed hot-take pointing out how stupid something is. South Park in it’s prime was ESPECIALLY good at the former.

Another interesting about these properties? The characters aren’t really that complex. They ARE strawmen! They are stereotypes! They ARE awful people. But either through the sheer audacity of the situation or how much the plot involves them, you somehow end up caring for these miserable, one-note people.

Viv’s humor fares more on this basic “schlockynottooseriousparody/comedy”-side of things, but Helluva Boss does this better than Hazbin.

Helluva Boss -both the actual pilot and it’s promotional material- doesn’t make any promises for any “deeper” character development. None of these demons at I.M.P are good people. None of them are SUPPOSED to be good people - they are literally demons who were never human and know nothing but absolute sin.

((yes, I know this sounds similar to the “they’re in hell” non-argument. My point is not that this defense is foolproof, but that it works better in the context of Helluva vs. Hazbin. It’s a world building quirk, even though I’m not 100% sure Viv and her audience are in on the joke))

It makes their weird bits of NOTawfulness more funny because what business do they have being polite about their work or having any emotional connection to each other(Moxxie and Millie)? But they do! Blitzo is weird, even for a demon, but again he IS ONE, so his breaking into his coworkers house is just “annoying” to Moxxie and Millie rather than, you know, stalking which is absolutely what that is <--- it’s a bit of comedy that, to me, tells you what you need to know about these demons and what somehow is and isn’t good to them, which is to say: it varies!

((The one MASSIVE exception to this is Stolas who is 100% predatory and it’s played for laughs. Beejesus no. Get owl boy out here. ))

Different series use their mythical creatures to different affect. In Satina the joke is that this demon-antichrist really is more of a little girl with a looser dad w. the version of hell being a send up to classic, even basic depictions of demons in media. Helluva’s different, with the Hell in that world being more of a ritzy, scummy city where everyone’s a dick to everyone else, and that’s fine. Even the joke in the beginning where the imps interview one of their clients tells you all you need to know about why this guy is in Hell, how he doesn’t get the point, and what the humor and tone of the short is striving for. I guess that’s why I’m just not offended by them using the R word, Blitzo laughing at the homeless (which is more of a joke on Blitzo, I thought), or the child murder. It felt oddly in character for these awful little creatures.

Helluva knows what it is and what it wants to be. While it’s fans and creators still take it too seriously, it really doesn’t set out to do much.

Hazbin has 99 problems and good world-building aint one. What IS one of those 99 problems - just as if not more than the lackluster storytelling or world building - is it’s attitude towards the subject matter.

Hazbin wants to have it’s cake and eat it too, but it isn’t properly established and the creators/fanbase already overemphasis how our cast ‘isn’t ALL bad; deep down’ and how they’re ‘complicated’. It gets me mad when people claim Angel IS GOOD representation because I just ‘don’t know the whole story yet’.

-You’re right! I don’t. Stop building it up because as I’ve said before what we have at the moment is what we 100% get. I can’t criticize what I don’t know but I can criticize what I do know.

And what I know about it is Viv tends to promote her brand as being representive of LGBT+ people. Her fans and her act as though her works are actually a total net-positive ‘guyz we’re just being edgythey’reinhellandit’sapilotsoit’sfreefromcriticismanywayletswritefanfictionforaserieswedon’tactuallyknowyet.’

If Viv and her brand didn’t promo Hazbin as being deeper than it actually is/NEEDS TO BE at the time of this production in the storytelling - well THAT would axe a lot of the bad criticism right there. For all the discourse in the She-Ra and SU fandoms about what is and isn’t good representation, the showrunners of those cartoons don’t aim to stereotype + hit for the lowest common denominator while also insisting that their show is actually woke and ya’ll “just don’t get it.”

((As an aside, if you are any of the following: gay, crossdresser, sex worker, undead spider demon-whatever, and you DO find Angel Dust empowering. GREAT! AWESOME. MORE POWER TO YOU.

But just because you aren’t offended by it and it was made with good intentions does NOT give it a pass < that’s the point I’m trying to make. ftm even with the explaination of the infamous ‘Charcoal’ design in SU, black people still have the right to be offended))

Remember the episode of Family Guy where Quagmire’s dad transitioned? It was Family Guy so no matter what it was gonna fumble the message, BUT what made things 100000x worse was Seth McFarlane promoting the episode as something the Trans community would really like.

It’s one thing to be ignorant or trying -and failing- to make a difference. It’s another to be arrogant about it.

If you are gonna go all schlock-humor I think it’s best to take the lead of Bltzo’s voice actor, Brandon Rogers. He makes A LOT of sacrifices for the most insanely-purposefully-offensive jokes that straddle between making fun of everyone or just rustlin some jimmies. Dude’s the modern John Waters.

He also doesn’t promote himself as a gay icon. He just is gay and what helps a lot of his characters is that he’s often making fun of gay stereotypes by giving them character or making homophobes the butt of the joke. Brandon doesn’t act like a net-positive. It’s when you hear him in interviews that you know he’s genuine and know he’s not a threat.

And it’s why I don’t have the same expectations I have for his work that I do for Vivs; Vivs works are often telling me how I should feel. ((ftm it’s also why Brandon’s approach to writing, comedy and potentially deeper elements are better than Doug Walker’s or Sam Fennah’s attempts to make awful people “moving”))

.....hey is there anyway we could give Viv’s shows to Brandon cause I would love a Brandon-Rogers-flavored Hazbin/permanent Helluva!

---

TL:DR: If Hazbin had established itself like Helluva with it’s cast just being unlikable, nothing else you needed to know about them, it could have then PROBABLY have worked it’s way up to being like Venture Bros or Rick and Morty in it’s activism. As is, it’ still only “progressive” in a hypothetical sense, and I’m sorry but that hurts it’s credibility as a joke and a thought piece, which or whatever it wants to be...

#hazbin hotel critical #hazbin critical #critical hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #brandon rogers

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what-is-your-plan-today · 5 years ago

Text

CSI: Rogers and Barnes- The Serious Cereal Serial Killer

Episode 1- Walk of Shame

Co written with @icanfeelastormbrewing

Episode Summary: Someone’s dead. Bucky has some plums and despairs at Steve’s choice of breakfast. They go to DC to try and convince Katie to come back and help with the case but she aint having it…coz she hates Steve’s guts… Episode Warnings: Bad Language words. Dark Comedy themes basically CSI:NY + Brooklyn 99 = CSI: Steeb.

Episode Pairings: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark (yeah she still doesn’t like him this Episode…)

Song for Episode: Let Her Go by Passenger

A/N: Contains Avengers and Stark Spangled Banner Easter Eggs and jokes. You don’t need to have read that series to understand or enjoy this, but we’ve used the Universe to spin this off from.

Also, our knowledge of American Policing and Brooklyn is limited, so bear with us if we slip up, but at the end of the day this is a fiction so we’ll claim any mistakes as creative license!!

PLEASE REBLOG and COMMENT!

Tags are open.

CSI Rogers and Barnes Master List

Main Masterlist

Steve turned the key in the lock of his apartment, stepped inside and closed the door behind him as slowly and quietly as possible so as not to wake up Bucky. It was still quite early, he had been on the usual morning run with Sam, something that the men did daily during the week unless work cases got in the way. He walked through the hallway and tossed his keys on the kitchen counter before grabbing a water bottle from the fridge. He practically drained it in one before he set a fresh pot of coffee to brew and then headed for the shower. He stopped on his way down the corridor as he saw the door to the spare bedroom, now Bucky’s, was wide open. Steve peered into the bedroom but there was no trace of Bucky and his bed was perfectly made, cushions in place. He sighed and went into his own bedroom, taking off his clothes and trainers and heading into the en-suite. He turned on the shower and stepped under the warm spray, tilting his head to greet the water as it cascaded down on him.

Bucky had returned from an undercover mission in Russia almost 7 months ago and had immediately taken possession of the spare room in Steve’s apartment. What had started as a favour to a friend who had returned from a long term mission overseas and was trying now to re-settle in New York, had turned into Steve seemingly permanently (and reluctantly for that matter) sharing his flat with his lead Sergeant and sometimes annoying friend. Their personalities were as opposed as day and night, but there was a bond between them that went back to their teenage years and both secretly hoped it would last till the end of the line.

Rinsing off his hair he turned off the shower and stepped out. He gave his hair a quick rub over and then, wrapping a towel round his waist he headed into the bedroom and over to the dresser which stood against the wall by the foot of his bed. His eyes fell to the framed photo on the top of it and he blew out a little huff as 2 laughing faces greeted him back. It was a photo of him and Katie, a selfie that she had snapped whilst they had been in Central Park. Katie had positioned them to get a squirrel in the back ground and it had worked. Just as Katie had pushed the button the squirrel had looked directly at the camera from behind them and it had sent the pair of them into a fit of laugher. Up until Bucky moving in, this photo had been in his living room by the stereo. But now it stayed in the private of his room. He couldn’t bring himself to place it in a drawer.

He dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a white t-shirt, before grabbing his electric razor to sort his facial hair out, ensuring his once again present (albeit shorter than before) beard was clean, crisp and defined. Once he had finished the rest of his morning routine he made his way to the kitchen and poured himself freshly brewed coffee into his favoured breakfast mug, one that was adored with the words “O Captain! My Captain!” a quote from the poem by Walt Whitman as read by Robin Williams in “Dead Poet Society” one of his favourite films. It had been a joke gift from Katie when he had gotten his promotion, just another reminder of how good their friendship used to be. He had just grabbed a piece of left over pizza from the fridge when the front door open and he heard Bucky taking off his shoes as he muttered something under his breath. When Bucky entered the kitchen Steve was leaning on the kitchen counter sipping from his mug and looking at his friend from under his long eyelashes.

“That your breakfast?“ Steve asked nodding towards a brown paper bag Bucky was sporting.

"Yup. That yours?” he answered looking at the pizza in Steve’s hand Steve shrugged. “Man, have a plum instead” Bucky offered.

"No, thanks.“ Steve refused curtly.

"You know breakfast is the most important meal of the day, don’t you?” Bucky quipped, biting into a plum. “That nutrition program you took years ago clearly didn’t teach you shit” he snorted.

“You’re hilarious" Steve deadpanned. “Where did you sleep last night? Or should that be with WHOM did you sleep last night?” Steve was asking both out of curiosity and as a way to distract attention from his eating habits. “What’s the dame’s name this time? That’s if you even bothered to ask.”

Bucky rolled his eyes as Steve drained his mug. “Name’s Alex seeing as you’re that interested, granddad.” Bucky informed. Steve merely arched an eyebrow and shoved his now empty mug in the dishwasher.

“I’m impressed” Steve said, walking out of the kitchen and heading to the living room “Have you remembered what Miss Friday was called yet?” “Maybe I always knew full well but didn’t want to tell you as you’re a judgemental dick.” Bucky shot back, following him into the living room “Just because you’re not getting any.”

Steve snorted and shook his head “I really don’t care about the fact you seem to be working your way through the entire female population of New York…” “Admit it, you’re backed up.” Bucky said, looking at him and Steve rolled his eyes. “When was the last time you got any?”

Steve really wasn’t prepared to divulge that. It had been Christmas time, with Katie…7 months ago. And he had no desire to tell Bucky. Instead, he ignored him and looked at his watch.

“We’re leaving in five” Steve said “Get ready Punk.”

"I am ready, jerk" Bucky replied gesturing to his outfit.

“You’re seriously gonna got to work wearing the same clothes you were wearing yesterday?“ Steve looked at him with an expression of disgust on his face. "Talk about the walk of shame.”

“Well, yesterday was my day off so nobody at the station will know what the hell I was wearing" Bucky replied with a wide playful smile.

"Whatever.“ Steve sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose while saying "Take your weapon and your badge and let’s go, it’s getting late.”

“Aye, Aye Captain” Bucky said miming a salute.

********

“Captain Rogers” greeted the security guard at the door of the station. “Sergeant Barnes.”

“Good morning, Heimdall” Steve greeted back while Bucky acknowledged the man with a nod of his head.

As the pair headed for the floor where the Investigation Unit of the 101st was located, Bucky pulled out his phone and started typing.

“Texting her?” Steve asked looking down at Bucky’s phone.

“Who’s her?” Bucky replied.

“Jeez, Buck, the girl you spent last night with. Alex, was it?” Steve scoffed.

“Oh.., nah.” he said with a frown “What would I?” he continued. “And you can say bang, Steve. You’re not a medieval bard” a mischievous smile now spreading on his face.

“Bucky, I swear to God one day….” Steve started to say but was interrupted by the melodious voice of Wanda as he got out of the elevator, Bucky following him cackling.

“Good morning, Steve.” Wanda said “Coffee?” she asked looking at him with doe eyes.

“No thanks, Wanda. Already had breakfast” he replied while Bucky muttered “If that’s what you call it”. Steve turned to give an icy look to Bucky who retreated to his desk.

“I’ve left the reports you asked for yesterday on your desk.” Wanda informed him. “Would that be all?”

“Thanks, Wanda.” he said before ordering “Assemble the team in the briefing room in fifteen.” and he walked towards where Natasha was scrolling through her phone and Clint was sat on his chair, his feet on the desk throwing a baseball against the nearby wall.

“Morning Romanoff” Steve said. Natasha lifted her eyes from the phone and acknowledged him.

“Rogers.”. She might seem to be engrossed on whatever she was doing with her phone but Steve knew she never missed a trick.

“Barton” the Captain raised his voice “You break something, you’re paying for it. We’re on a tight budget.” and with that he entered his office and shut the door behind him, something that was unusual for their Captain. His door normally remained open unless the conversation was private or he was pissed off.

As there was no one else in there with him, it was clearly the latter.

“He needs to get laid.” Clint said, turning back to Natasha, resuming his bouncing of his baseball again. Bucky let out a snort.

“He sure does” replied Natasha who suddenly threw her phone on her desk and got up to make her way towards Wanda’s counter.

“You should ask him out on a date” she whispered to Wanda leaning over her desk.

“Wh… What are you talking about” Wanda stuttered while closing the book she was reading and feeling the heat spread through her neck up to her cheeks.

“I’ve seen the way you look at him” Natasha added with a half-smile.

“That obvious” Wanda enquired covering her cheeks, which were now deep red, with her hands showing Natasha her chipped black nail polish. Bucky watched the exchange with a slight smirk.

Natasha only shrugged and retorted “Well, you should find the courage to do it in that witchery book you’re reading” she said pointing to the paperback with a movement of her head. “Scarlett Witch”.

Bucky picked up the phone, there was a message on his desk to call Stark about some evidence on a case, turning away to allow Wanda to get over her embarrassment. He heard the voice of Deputy Commissioner Fury and turned to watch as he greeted Natasha and Wanda.

"Good morning, ladies.“

“Good morning Sir…” They both said in unison as her swept past them heading towards Steve’s office. He rapped on the door and didn’t wait for an answer before he swung it open, causing Steve to glance up slightly puzzled. His team knew to wait for him to call them in before entering if his door was closed. At seeing his boss he immediately stood.

“Sir.”

“At ease Captain” The deputy commissioner spoke, waving his hand. Steve gestured for him to take the seat opposite his desk.

“You hear with a mission?”

“You could say that.” Fury said, “Get Barnes in here and close the door. This one’s sensitive.”

“Sir…” Steve frowned slightly and stood up, heading out into the main office.

“Buck…”

Bucky was by this point on the phone, leaning back in his chair feet on his desk. He looked at Steve, nodding to acknowledge him, holding his hand up, finger on his right hand extended instructing Steve to keep quiet.

“That’s great Stark!” he paused, “So it’s definitely a match…excellent, yeah…sure…thanks…”

He placed the phone down “Science Bros got a match on the bullet from the mini-mart robbery. Matches the gun Simon Cranston had in his possession when we brought him in. We got him bang to rights!”

“Good, listen, Buck…Fury’s here. Says he has a case but it’s sensitive…” Understanding immediately Bucky stood up. He smoothed down his blue and white button down and followed Steve into his office, closing the door behind him.

“We have a situation.” Fury said. “Body, found by a dog walker early hours of this morning. Early shift called it in.”

“Ok, well we’ve not held briefing yet…” Bucky said, trailing off as he saw the frown on Steve’s face.

“What is it sir?” “Technically it’s the 99s patch…” Fury said, “But as soon as Peralta realised who it was he called Holt who in turn called me. This is one for the 101st.”

“Why?” Steve asked, frowning.

“It’s Senator Ross.” Fury said, looking at him.

“Shit.” Steve sighed

“I’m not gonna lie Steve, as much as I admire and like Holt, your unit is more geared up for this and the 99 are currently swamped on a drugs case any way so…” Fury shrugged.

“Right, I’ll get the team onto it right away.”

“Odinson and his team are currently manning the scene, I had them take over from Holt’s guys as soon as I found out.” Fury nodded “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that we need absolute discretion about this, at least for the time being. I’ll liaise with the top brass and Capitol Hill. Once we know what we’re dealing with we can discuss how we handle the press. For now, keep them away.” “Sir.” Steve agreed.

“I trust you can take it from here?”

Steve nodded and watched as his boss left before he turned to Bucky. “Get Romanoff and Barton down there now, and then get onto Wilson and Stark. I’ll call Holt, find out the details and sort out taking over. Then we’ll head down there.”

“Sure.” Bucky said, heading out into the office, closing the door behind him.

Steve paused for a second, before he picked up the phone sighing. A murder always attracted attention but when it was a public figure that interest was going to be relentless.

*****

It was almost ten when Steve pulled his car to a stop near Greenway Terrace in Brooklyn Bridge Park. Bucky got out of the car closing the door behind him and put his phone in the back pocket of his black jeans and waited for Steve to reach his side before they both started walking towards the tightly secured area.

They approached Thor who was standing by the Scene Crime Do Not Cross yellow tape ordering to one of his immediate subordinates to remove unnecessary individuals from the scene and keep the tourists and the press as far away as possible. It was a bright July morning and this part of the park offered the tourists, and the public in general, a beautiful shady sitting area with stunning views to New York Harbor.

Once they exchanged a few words with Thor who assured them he would keep the press at bay, they ducked under the tape and headed to the area where Detectives Romanoff and Barton were examining the surroundings of the crime scene.

"Romanoff, Barton. What do we got?” Bucky heard Steve ask the pair of detectives.

He was looking around trying to get used to the scene before him. He had spent the last years mostly doing undercover work, gathering intel, bringing down drugs or arms dealers and smugglers so, it had been a while since he had been in a presumed murder scene.

“We’re sweeping the area for casings or slugs.” Natasha said.

“Nothing, Cap, according to Wilson there’s no gunshot wound, so…” Clint added.

“Footprints? Vehicle tracks?” Steve enquired.

“No vehicle tracks. And seeing as this is a granite terrace no chance of footprints either.” Clint replied. “We are searching the area for some mud or dirt marks though."

Steve nodded, analysing the information his detectives had delivered, his hands perched on his belt. "Any indications that the crime may have occurred somewhere else?"

“Nope.” Natasha said “But we won’t know for certain until forensics finish.”

"All right. I want you two to investigate the surrounding neighbourhood. This took place presumably last night and there’s this hill over there that separates the area from Furman Street, so it is unlikely that we find any witnesses.” Steve elaborated.

“Got it Cap…” Clint said. “We’ll talk to the neighbours. See if anybody has seen anything suspicious.”

“Romanoff…” Steve started to say before Natasha cut in.

“We’ll visit the surrounding shops and businesses to check surveillance footage. I know the drill , Rogers.” to which Steve couldn’t help but smile.

“Ok. See you at the station when you’re done.” Steve dismissed them and looked at Bucky who was watching as the forensics assistants were taking photos of the crime scene and the corpse from every angle possible.

“Ready to see what Ross has to say?” Steve asked Bucky as he began to walk towards Sam Wilson, the unit Pathologist and Tony Stark, lead forensic who was gathering evidence.

“Didn’t know you were one for black humour, punk” Bucky replied suppressing a laugh.

“Wilson?” Steve greeted Sam. “What do you have?”

“Hi, Rogers. You prefer the cause or the manner?” Sam shot back.

“Is the order relevant?” Steve asked smiling at Sam’s playful ways.

“Not in this case.” Sam said.

“What about the time of death?” Bucky asked.

Sam pondered about it for a few seconds before replying “I estimate it between three and five a.m.”

“What? Two hours span? Couldn’t you be more specific?” Bucky said surprised by Wilson answer.

“Where did you get this guy, Rogers?” Tony entered the exchange. “Do you want the exact hour and minute? That’s impossible unless you were here with a stopwatch!"

"Stark.” Sam tried to shut Tony.

“All right. Call it, Wilson” Tony said with a sigh but glaring at Bucky.

“Well, based on the corpse temperature and his body mass and taking into account muscle stiffening and blood setting, I could give you from three to four thirty in the morning, but we’ll have to wait until I’ve opened him up to be more accurate.” Sam elaborated.

“The guy is as pale as a ghost” Bucky tried to say something meaningful.

“No shit, Sherlock. It’s called palor in scientific jargon.” Tony quipped visibly annoyed at Bucky’s presence.

“That’s enough!” Steve raised his voice. “Wilson, please, continue.”

“All right. So, it looks like he was killed here. There’s enough blood on the ground and no sign that he was moved after the killing took place…the murderer knocked him down first, nasty wound on the back of the head and he took a bit of a beating too. Lots of bruising to his face.” Sam explained.

“Quite a violent MO. Rage…” Steve mused.

“Yeah. If the cereal didn’t choke him to death, the blunt force trauma did it.” Sam said looking down at the corpse. “But again, I’ll know more when…”

“Hang on, what do you mean? What cereal?” Steve cut him off while sharing a surprised look with Bucky.

“I pulled this out of his throat with a pair of tweezers.” Tony said to Steve showing him an evidence bag with what looked like some sort of breakfast cereal.

“Are those Puffed Rice?” Bucky asked gaining a glare from Tony. Sam and Steve looked at him at the same time.

“That’s one hell of an odd calling card.” Steve whispered gazing past the other men into the river front. “What kind of message is cereal conveying?”

“Well, I think that…” Bucky was beginning to say but was interrupted by a raging Tony.

“Barnes, would you shut up? We’re trying to work here and your presence is disturbing enough without your silly comments.”

Steve wanted to warn Tony about his remarks but things were a bit rocky between them after what had happened at the Commendation party, so he let it be.

“Thanks, Wilson. Let me know when you’re ready to do the PM.” Steve said. He always liked to attend the Post Mortems in person, if possible. It was easier to ask questions and understand as Sam worked.

“Yeah, well, cut the cheque.” Sam replied.

Steve smiled at the pathologist, who was waiting for Judge Hill’s order to remove the body and take it to the morgue, and waved both men goodbye as he ordered Bucky to follow him with a movement of his head.

“What do you think?” Steve asked him

“Well before Stark jumped in, and by the way that guy has a stick up his ass, I was about to say I think we need a profiler” Bucky replied while both men walked their way back to the car.

Steve was quiet for a minute before saying “I know someone."

Bucky had noticed Steve hesitation before speaking and was about to ask him who he was talking about but was interrupted by Steve’s phone ringing. So he waited patiently leaning on the car door while Steve got the call. He was scrolling through his own messages when Steve came back with a serious demeanour.

"We’re stopping at Police Plaza. It was Pierce, he wants to meet me at headquarters.”

*******

Bucky headed into the coffee shop over the road whilst Steve was waved up to Pierce’s office.

“Captain Rogers…” Pierce greeted him. “I’m sure you can guess what this is about.” “Ross.” Steve nodded, taking a seat as Pierce nodded.

“Ross and I were at University together.” Pierce said, “So this…well, it’s kind of personal for me.” “I’m sorry to hear that sir.” Steve nodded.

“So, I want to be kept in the loop on this one. Normally I don’t take an interest in every body we find, I can’t but…”

“I understand.” Steve assured the Commissioner.

“So, do we have a cause of death?”

“Well…” Steve scratched at his chin “We won’t know for sure until we can do the Post Mortum, which hopefully will be later today but…well, it’s odd. It was either a blow to the head or cereal.”

“Cereal?” Pierce blinked.

“Yes, Forensics recovered a quantity of the stuff in his throat. But like I say, we won’t know for sure until Dr Wilson has done his job.” Pierce sighed. “Who uses Cereal as a murder weapon?” “Well, on that…” Steve sighed. “I think we could do with a profiler.”

“Whatever you need.” Pierce said, “I’ll pull some strings, get you someone from the FBI, anything.” “With all due respect Sir…” Steve looked at him “I’d rather bring in a profiler who’s in the force…and I know just the person. But I’d like the chance to speak to them first. They won’t feel happy about simply being forced into this if that makes sense.” “I really don’t care if they’re happy or not.” Pierce said, his jaw twitching “I want the A- team on this, Rogers, no matter what.” “Absolutely, and you have my word. If they don’t agree I’ll call, then you can pull whatever strings you need.”

“Who do you have in mind?” Pierce looked at him. They continued to talk, Pierce promising to make budget available for all the overtime he needed before he headed down in the elevator, leaning back against the wall. Working a murder was always stressful as you were under so much pressure to bring the perp to justice, but with Pierce now being personally interested, the pressure was going to double. He stepped out of the cool air conditioned lobby of HQ and called Fury to run his idea passed him. Fury gave him the green light and with that he crossed the road, finding Bucky was on the phone.

“I don’t believe in co-incidences Romanoff.” he said, nodding to Steve “It could be nothing but just keep an open mind…” Steve gestured to the phone and Bucky handed it over.

“Romanoff, its Rogers.” he said,

“Hey Cap.” “Listen, I need to head out of town with Sergeant Barnes for the evening, related to this case. We’re bringing in a profiler and I need to speak to them in person. Can you liaise with Wilson and ensure either your or Clint, or both are at the PM. Usual stuff…” “Sure.” there was a pause “Who’s the profiler, anyone we know?” There was a lilt to her voice that told Steve she knew exactly who he had in mind.

“Dismissed” he said simply, ending the call and tossing the phone back to Bucky. “What’ the coincidence?”

“Oh, erm… Ross’s real name is Paul Thaddeus Ross, he uses his middle name.” “So?” “PR…his initials, same as the cereal…puffed rice.” “That’s a bit tentative Buck” Steve said. “But good spot, we’ll bear it in mind.”

“So, you taking me on a trip?” Bucky looked at him, quirking an eyebrow.

“Yeah.

“Anywhere nice?”

“DC.” Steve looked at him “The profiler I told you about. She lives there.” “She…oh, you’re talking about Stark…the little one?” Bucky said with a slight sigh. “You want me to drive with you to DC, to convince the woman that hates your guts to come back and work for you?” “Pretty much, yeah.” Steve nodded. “Why her man? You could bring in any profiler…” “Because she knows the team.” Steve said, “I explained this to Pierce. Getting that lot to trust an outsider to the force will be hard work and I don’t have time for Natasha pulling her grin of death shit. Profilers who are actually still active officers within the Police Service are a rare commodity and, well frankly Buck, she’s one of the best in the business.” “And you let her go…” Bucky sighed, shaking his head. “I wasn’t going to stand in the way of her taking an opportunity that was, frankly, too good to refuse.” Steve sighed. “Right.” Bucky said “and that’s all there was to it?” “Yup” Steve held his gaze as best he could. “You’re a shit liar.” Bucky grumbled, standing up “I take it we get an overnighter?” Steve smiled, knowing that was Bucky’s way of agreeing to come with him. “Yeah, we’ll stay tonight. If we leave within the hour we should be there for just before 6pm.” Steve said, checking his watch. “You’re the boss…” Bucky said, standing up “We best go grab a bag.”

Less than 30 minutes later the 2 of them were making their way out of Brooklyn, the address of the SHIELD unit building programmed into the GPS.

"So how you gonna play this?” Bucky asked, lounging back in the passenger seat of Steve’s Audi Q5. It made Bucky laugh how Steve’s newest purchase, the sleek steel grey Audi held every gadget and extra he could ever need and then some. Steve lived quite a frugal lifestyle. He had nice things, his apartment was furnished well, his clothes were a mixture of high end high street brands with the odd designer item thrown in, but he never bought what he didn’t need as such. His apartment was a total of 5 rooms including the bedrooms despite the fact he could easily afford a more grandiose place. Bucky knew that it was as a product of growing up without much, his mom had never been well off, and Steve was likely stashing most of his money for a rainy day.

But when it came to cars, Steve Rogers was happy to splurge.

The Captain shifted slightly and bit his bottom lip , his thumb rapping on the top of the steering wheel. "I’m gonna show her the case file. Ask her opinion. See what she makes of it…and hopefully it’s gonna grab her interest enough to make her agree to come back for a while…“ "And if it fails?” Steve hesitated. He looked at Bucky who gave a groan, spotting the look on his face. “You’ll go over her head…man she’s gonna hate you even more then!” “Not sure that’s possible.” Steve sighed

*******

“Steve…” Captain Phil Coulson stood up, greeting him warmly “It’s been a while.” “Indeed it has.” Steve smiled at the man he had worked a case with a few years back, one which saw Thor’s brother, Loki, put away for a very long time. “Almost 3 years I believe.”

“Time flies when you’re having fun huh?” Coulson smiled and Steve reciprocated.

“Sergeant, James Barnes…Captain Phil Coulson.” Steve introduced the two men. “Please, call me Bucky.”

Phil nodded and then gestured to the elevator “Shall we?”

They followed him in, their Visitors badges pinned to their chests

“So, Fury called ahead. You want Stark back?”

“In a nutshell.” Steve nodded “I can’t go into details but…we need a profiler, and this one’s already getting some high up attention. From our Commissioner no less.” “Yeah I won’t lie, I’m not happy about this.” Coulson sighed “She’s working a case on a very big Sex Trafficking ring at the moment so losing her will be a blow…”

“She is only on secondment.” Steve reminded the man “The deal was if we need her back…” “I know” Coulson assured Steve he understood, “But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“Phil, I wouldn’t be doing this if I had a choice.” Steve said gently.

“That’s right, he wouldn’t. She hates him…” Bucky added. Steve shot him a glare.

Coulson frowned “Really? She’s never had anything but praise for her old team and commanding officer.” Steve felt something in his chest warm slightly.

“But of course, that could just be professional courtesy.” Coulson finished.

The warmth disappeared.

The elevator stopped and they stepped out into a large, modern, open planned office. Coulson led them through the throngs of desks, towards the right side of the room. Steve heard her before he saw her.

“I really don’t give a shit…” she was saying, her tone exasperated “This is a big chance for us to nail this guy. So you tell Sergeant Jones his men are needed…and don’t make me go to Coulson…”

As they approached her desk Steve saw her slam the phone down and rub her hands over her face and he could already smell her day perfume- Daisy By Marc Jacobs. A light, woody fragrance yet fresh and feminine at the same time. Whenever he caught the smell of it on anyone else he instantly thought of her. It was alluring, comforting…

Her head raised, her green eyes locked onto his and she shook her head. “You have got to be shitting me…” she spluttered out.

“Sergeant…” Coulson looked at her, “Really?”

“Sorry Sir, I’m just…surprised, shall we say, to see Captain Rogers. And Sergeant Barnes.” her tone was even but her eyes were flashing dangerously.

“Strictly business…” Steve held his hands up “Got a case I need your help on.”

“Out of all the profilers…you need me?”

“He says you’re the best.” Bucky jumped in. At that her face softened somewhat and she gave a sigh and turned to her boss.

“Can we use the briefing room?”

Coulson nodded “I’ll get Jackson to book it out for you.” “Thanks.” she said, moving her chair back. She stood up and Steve took her in, dressed as always for work, a button down (light pink this time) the top few buttons undone revealing a navy blue vest top coupled with black jeans and tan knee high boots. “Gentlemen…” She motioned for them to follow her and they headed into the large room at the back. She closed the door and perched on the desk at the front and looked at Steve expectantly. “So what made you drive 4 hours over here to hear me tell you to fuck off instead of merely picking up the phone?” “This.” Steve said, handing her his phone after he pulled up the photos he’d had Tony email him.

“Holy shit…” she mumbled “Ross? He’s dead?”

Steve nodded “Commissioner Pierce is taking a personal interest on this, and given the odd calling card left, I’ve got a feeling this isn’t going to be the last body that turns up.” She looked at him, the pair of them sharing an understanding. Unless it was gang related, it was unusual for a calling card to be left by a onetime killer.

“Keep going…” Steve said, as she swiped across his screen. He watched as her mouth dropped open as she squinted at the screen, before looking at Steve, then Bucky, then back to the photo.

“Is that…puffed rice?” she asked.

“You got it.” Bucky nodded “But we won’t know if that’s what killed him until Wilson’s done the PM.” “Death by Cereal…” she snorted “A Cereal Serial killer…”

Despite himself, Steve felt his mouth curl up in a smile “I was hoping it would grab your attention.”

Katie bit the inside of her cheek “I’ve never seen anything like this before.” “Why cereal?” Bucky looked at her.

She scratched her head “Ok, so this is purely supposition, but when I was training to become a profiler, there was a case study about a killer in Minnesota. He was leaving Caviar in the mouths of his victims. They were upper class bankers and dealers, he was targeting them because he blamed them for his business going bankrupt. It was kind of a taunt really…” she bit her lip “But Cereal is something that’s so widely available, it can’t be that…maybe it’s the opposite. Look how dangerous something that you can see or take for granted every day can be…”

Bucky looked at Steve, and had to smile at the way the Captain was looking at the woman opposite him, his expression soft, almost proud.

“You said she was good Steve…” he said and Steve turned to him, giving him a smile. Katie held out his phone and he took it, his fingers brushing her slightly and she pulled her hand back immediately, a pink flush rising to her cheeks as she looked down at her legs which were swinging to and fro as she sat on the desk.

“So what do you say?” Steve asked softly

“I can’t.” she said after a pause.

“Katie…” “No, Steve.” she looked at him “I left Brooklyn to do a job here, and that’s what I’m gonna do. Pull someone in from the Bureau.”

“I don’t want someone from the Bureau.” Steve said “I need someone on this we can trust, someone that knows the team, someone that can get their hands dirty…”

She sighed and looked up at him, and he didn’t miss the flash of sadness across her face “The days of me jumping to your tune are over.” she said with a shrug “Sorry, you’ve had a wasted journey but no is my final answer. Good luck.” With that she hopped off the desk and left the room without looking back.

“Well that went well.” Bucky said, “I could say I told you so but…” “Don’t” Steve practically growled, his hands on the buckle of his belt. “Looks like I’m gonna have to do this the hard way.”

“Yeah she’s gonna have your balls for earrings.” Bucky turned to him. “Now I don’t know about you but I think we should check in with Romanoff about the PM and then go get a drink.” ***** “So you’re alive then?” Katie’s voice hit Steve’s ears as she shut the office door behind her. “Just ghosting me.”

“I’m not…” he started to protest but knew it was useless, she’d hit the nail on the head. He had been avoiding her. Completely.

“Why Steve?” she asked, her eyes brimming with tears “I thought…I thought it meant something to you, that I meant something to you…” “Sweetheart…” he sighed, walking out from his desk towards her “It did, you do, I just…” “You just what?” she looked up at him. “I wake up, and you’re gone…didn’t even stay for breakfast… and then you ignore me for 3 days?”

“I shouldn’t have let it get as far as it did.” he sighed.

“So you regret it?” “No, it’s not that…” he sighed “Katie, I’m your boss…this…us…” he waved his hand between them “it can’t happen.” “It’s a bit late for that…” Katie shook her head, the tears in her eyes were now replaced with a blazing fire, one that he knew only too well and he inwardly cringed at the verbal attack he was about to receive. Only it never came. Instead her voice remained level as she raised her chin to look at him straight on “You know, you pretend to be this moral guy, when all along you’re no different to the rest of them. You got what you wanted and now you’re not interested.” “Katie, that’s not what it was.” he sighed “I care about you, everything I said that night was true but…” “I’m gonna take that job in DC.” she said, cutting him off.

Steve sighed “There’s plenty of time to think about that. Don’t do anything rash…” “Well then give me a reason to stay.” she whispered, pleading with him as she stepped forward. “Steve, we could have something so good if you just give it a chance.” Steve’s hands fell to her hips, an automatic response, before he moved back, shaking his head. And that was the moment he saw her break. The disappointment in her eyes killed him and he couldn’t look at her anymore.

“I can’t.” he said, turning away.

She didn’t speak another word. Instead she turned and left, not even slamming the door behind her.

“The next day I signed the paper work to authorise the 2 year secondment.” Steve said, his fingers sliding across the label on the bottle of beer in front of him as he sat in the bar opposite the hotel with Bucky, finishing his explanation “She left at the weekend without speaking so much as another word to me, said her goodbyes to the team when she knew I wouldn’t be there.”

“You didn’t even try and fight for her?” Bucky looked at him, shaking his head “Man, what the actual fuck?” “Can you imagine the shit storm it would cause?” Steve sighed “One of us would have had to move units, and that would have been her, not me.” “Dude, you could have worked through that!” Bucky said “She was coming to DC, it’s not that far away. You could have seen each other at weekends, or in your free time…” “Maybe.” Steve sighed. If truth be told he’d thought about that a lot after she left. Thought about calling her and seeing if they could work it out, but the longer he left it the harder it got. And she ignored all the calls and texts he had sent her anyway. “It’s too late now.” he shook his head. “Do you love her?” Bucky looked at him. Steve hesitated for a second, considering the question. It was an easy answer in the end.

“I think in a way I always have.” Steve shrugged “As a friend anyway…”

“That’s not what I asked.” Bucky said simply.

Steve looked at him and sighed “Don’t make me say it Buck, please.”

That was all the confirmation Bucky needed. He shook his head and looked at his friend “You’re an idiot.” “I know.”

“How are you gonna feel when she comes back?” “Same as I always feel when she’s around.” Steve drained his bottle “Like that scrawny assed punk from Brooklyn that was always getting his ass kicked.”

“Well, just like old times then…” Bucky said, knocking back the rest of his drink before he clapped a hand on his friend’s shoulder “I got ya back pal, till the end of the line.”

@the-omni-princess @momobaby227 @geekofmanythings16 @angelofhell-666 @thewackywriter @marvelfansworld @cobalt-gear @asgardlover75 @jennmurawski13 @jtargaryen18 @saiyanprincessswanie @navispalace @patzammit @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @djeniiscorner @ayamenimthiriel @coldmuffinbanditshoe @disneylovingal @madzmilllz @sgtjaamesbaarnes @sweater-daddiesdumbdork @southerngracela @goldenfightergir @kellymat @official-and-unstable-satan

#csi rogers and barnes #csi au #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers x oc #steve rogers #bucky barnes #tony stark #clint barton #natasha romanoff #wanda maximoff #sam wilson #bruce banner

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avastudios · 6 years ago

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twitter saw this first + i know i just woke up but this is an exercise for me to be productive during the day so anyways let me present: My grand Neo Culture Theory🤯

ok so. first and foremost i think we should start with 7th sense because that's the very first song released. you know how the lyrics are open your eyes and all and that literally explains they're really in a dream, or dream in a dream in that case. also 7th sense is about them sensing there's another parallel universe (what) and even the logo explains it – yo that connects to the balancing black balls thing on black on black (holy shit)

later on, in chewing gum mv the dreamies are stuck in an orphanage something-something. and not to forget that legendery chenle screencap, that moment when they entered another room before they get caught and there's chenle smirking – bruh, judging by the lights i think they were going to meet ten or sumn bcs yo dream in a dream mv

hah, every theorists out there leaving mfal mv and firetruck mv out of the picture because they seem to be out of context. well, their teacher in mfal mv is a science teacher, and a glimpse on the board is fixated on the topic of solar system. nct dream were learning about universes all along! firetruck mv is explained later

switch mv is a rlly big deal!! the casette recorder is yellow and it's the same one in regular mv😮 + bro nctmentary explained a lot. first of all when two dreamies were seen running to that house, i think that's the orphanage?? they don't know if it is a dream or reality, but anyways i think when they met ten on the other room they had the time of their lives, became teenage rebels and that's where go mv originated. haechan's 'run run run' lyric is really puzzling omg but im gonna connect it to his superhuman lyric 'run away from this boring routine day' bcs you know donghyuck, a dilly darn prankster actually getting bored of his life or whatever the fucking world they're in

yestoday mv talks about their struggles. touch mv is about the string theory (stolen from someone in twt) "The problem with string theory, according to some physicists, is that it makes too many universes". IT MAKES TOO MANY UNIVERSES. THOSE ARE LITERALLY THE ONES IN TAEYONG'S DRAWER IN BOSS MV HOOOOOEE wow im going nuts

IM NEVER GONNA FORGET ABOUT WITHOUT YOU. 's making me piss my pants but it's still a big effin mystery as to why sicheng,, is in the train,, coincidence? i think so. his sudden appearance speaks a lot but in uncanny shambles. jaehyun was asleep in without you and guess what,, he's prolly dreaming about taeil and doyoung w that girl too and yo, sicheng most likely hinted about joining their group of friends from that day onwards and bam, he's in 127.

nct 127 might've gotten their unit name from the latitude of seoul but then,, i actually did research ok. "angel 127 is all about manifesting your dreams into reality. Whenever this powerful angel number shows up in our lives, it brings an influence that highlights achievement and success. The project that you have been working on for a while is about to take a favorable turn." YO?¿??¿ PROJECT = ALL THE LABWORKS, NCTMENTARY, REGULAR OFFICE. continuing on, "When working on manifesting your dreams, it is important to remain open to the messages that the angels continuously send to you. When you see angel number 127 showing up on work related documents, in financial transactions, and even on the alarm clock when you wake in the middle of the night, it is time to quiet your mind and allow the messages the angels are sending to come to the surface." HUHH AINT THAT WHAT NCT 127 RLLY DID IN REGULAR OFFICE,, bruh they keep stamping and stamping their logo and shit

so since 127 in angel number sign says all of that... bro. FIRETRUCK MV. didnt nct 127 members themselves said that they're acting like the little girl's guardian angels all along?? what if they're really guardian angels all along?? they're guardian angels that keep delivering the sign number 127, which all makes sense regarding their concept.

nctmentary – yo im about to call the whole army on sm for ruining half of my braincells. we are uncertain on who the actual heck is controlling dream lab and someone says it's johnny and i somehow agree. shown in superhuman he's rlly working hard to go tech tech on my mind in order to meet their other halves.

boss mv – yo, the balls in taeyong's drawer,, marty im anxious but they're the planets from the parallel universe and taeyong's supposed to pick ONE (1) ball and he prolly chose wayv's world. + boss is the era where they argue on who will get to control the universe they will be taking over but then realizes that's impossible and so later on they learn the value of cooperation and teamwork

dream launch mv was bamboozling and idk what is wayv on but 👽👽👽 i dont even know which nct unit is on this dream planet and that reality planet but regarding regular chn ver. mv, wayv sure came from a lab which might point out to them trying to find ways on how to get to the other world to meet the rest of nct. (i ddd kKK what happened to dream lab anyway why is wayv in a l a b tHO) then on dream launch,, they discovered a wormhole. yo they tested it right?? and that huge candy that they used to test using the closet,,, alrdy betting that came from chewing gum mv aka nct dream's world. and fucking– wayv was able to get to the wormhole and that's why they saw the earth from their view but HEY DONT FORGET xiaojun woke up the moment he entered.

THE KID. THE KID RLLY SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME but someone said it's anyone from chewing gum era nct dream so idfk lmao it could be chenle or something bcs he seems to be the bridge between nct dream and wayv. and to talk abt chenle, yo, he's the first one who woke up from the dream in we go up mv and it's bcs he knows!! he knows abt the parallel universe and wayv themselves so when mark woke up, abt to leave their group of friends /bcs he'll have to stick with nct 127 now/, chenle begs help from him to save their friends and get them out of this world and that's what mark does, as an nct 127 member.

PEOPLE LISTEN UP OK?? THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART. in ten's dream, he stood over a house in ruins. AND THAT HOUSE IS NCT DREAM'S... bro, i did say abt them running away and nct dream's go was born,, makes sense as to why we go up seemed like a runaway with friends story too... they no longer have a home sis, it was shown in ten's dream but i dont know abt their universe

the massive circles,,, boss, touch, black on black, simon says, wakey wakey, superhuman... this is really mind-boggling but the circles seem to be the portal to the other world(ok wtf)

in my conclusion nct dream is nct dream bcs they all dreaming except for some (literally that's why wakey wakey mv starred haechan who's still dreaming when they're already supposed to be exploring out the world together and find out the mystery about the parallel universe BECAUSE. HAECHAN IS ALRDY AN ADULT and he be joining his bros)

taeyong hinted about the colors about his dream from nctmentary. and to talk abt regular mv, LISTEN, winwin and jungwoo had prominent roles here. winwin was shown on a roof and falling, and the whole scene is colored. colored means either reality or a dream, i don't know, we about to figure that out. on the other hand, jungwoo fell too, and his falling scene is black and white. then later on, he takes off the harness as if nothing happened. THIS IS IT, FOLKS, this is rlly the representation of jungwoo entering nct 127 and winwin leaving nct 127 because he fell in his dreams. he fell, and somehow it became a reality, and wormhole said hello.

the casette recorder from switch mv appeared again, this time in both versions of regular mvs. both are yellow. in the eng ver, yuta placed it in the car while on the kor ver, mark inserted the radio. it's the same one in nctmentary, and they use it to see, record and view their dreams. it explains how they enter their dreams in regular mv (!! lyrics of the two versions are different. kor ver is the reality, speaking up abt their sass and struggles regarding life. eng ver is their dream, 'i just made a million and im still not satisfied')

on the third episode of nctmentary, haechan was surrounded by cameras. i assume those cameras record their dreams, and one of them is spotted in regular mv. even the TV in markyong's barber shop says that they are, literally, in a dream.

!!! during simon says era, winwin wasn't included in the choreography anymore nor he was with them during promotions, which implies he really has left. in fact, there indeed was a scene in simon says mv that showed how winwin fell to the wormhole. that's how winwin ended up leaving nct 127, as reaffirmed in regular mv, and eventually joined wayv in their world.

superhuman mv analysis gives me anxiety – haechan is still bored, but he has woken up from his dreams and stood up from where he left off in wakey wakey. everyone is exceeding their limits. they're becoming superhumans just to overcome the portal and reach the other end of the universe. it becomes clear in this mv that nct 127 are in a world that is not real, considering that their settings are glitching, beyond extraordinary and technologically centered. johnny is shown to be at the center of that portal thing and that proves how he really is testing things out, handling dream lab and examining stuffs through. and moreover, jungwoo is disintegrating speaks a lot. he's in the same position as xiaojun was in takeoff mv, so he might've been transferred to the other portal as the group's scientific testing.

im rlly anxious but imagine this scenario. what if uh, wayv arrives at nct 127's world using the plane in take off mv, but then at the same time nct 127 finds the way to get out of their dreams and escape their non-reality world to get to meet the others. so they cross paths and never meet – imagine.

some theorists also say that they're supposed to meet through their dreams... and they did. it sounds impossible to direct i rlly think most of the nct member's relationship are jumbled; take for an example, jungwoo, yukhei and winwin's relationship. first off, boss mv is a dream wherein they met. the final moment winwin had with nct 127 happened at the same time when jungwoo showed up and entered nct 127. then winwin unknowingly fell into the wormhole ('unknowingly' = they didnt know until it was reported in dream launch) and met yukhei on the other world. + another example is ten. ten is uncertainly the bridge between all four units. he most likely got to meet nct dream in dream in a dream mv, but no, he didn't, probably bcs the dream in a dream setting led to another world. nct dream, through that purple-lighted room, managed to go through that house. and later on, ten is shown standing on the house but in ruins. ten, through new heroes setting, met wayv and joined in their world. at the beginning, ten shows up in 7th sense (!! everyone in 7th sense is dreaming ok).

black on black is probably a dream. of course it's a dream, clarified by those black balancy balls and stuffs, and it's a dream where they're all together as they wished so.

!!! just to clarify that the ending of all of these mess is supposed to be kun's dream from nctmentary. listen here they're supposed to go through rough roads and such like the staircase from kun's dream before they all meet again in one place, not separated by planets. so, in conclusion, wherever they meet alltogether as one, it's their world.

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ofstarsandvibranium · 6 years ago

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Right Person, Wrong Number: Part 2

Fandom: Marvel (Wrong Number AU)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: After a break up with the love of your life, you move to New York City to pursue your dream of photography. There, you end up getting a text from an unknown number.

A/N: a lot of the chapters will mostly consist of texts between bucky and reader

Part 1

You were freaking out! Brock was supposed to be in the next upcoming shots but he wasn’t anywhere to be found.

“I’m gonna strangle that guy!” you marched over to Wanda, “Do you have Brock’s number?”

She sighed, “Unfortunately.”

“Lemme have it so I can tear his ass into shreds!” Wanda gave you his number and you thanked her. You then walked back towards your camera texting the number:

You: Where the hell are you?! I know you think you’re some big hotshot model or whatever, but you’re not! Maria’s looking for you! Get here ASAP!

You waited anxiously for a reply and you got one.

Unknown number: Who the hell is this?

You: Stop playing around, Brock! It’s Y/N! Now get your ass back to set so we can get this shoot over with!

Unknown number: I don’t know who Brock is, but it sure as hell aint me, sweetheart.

You: Shit! Sorry! Trying to get a hold of an asshat of a model. Anyway, sorry for bothering you.

Unknown number: It’s fine Y/N. Sounds like he’s causing you a lotta stress and trouble

You: YES! Sooo much! Anyway, I should really get back to finding this asshole. Sorry again!

Unknown number: I understand. You seem scary. I don’t think I wanna mess with you.

You: Good. I’m a mean, green fighting machine!

Unknown number: haha. I’m sure you are.

“Y/N!” you looked up to see Maria waiting walking towards you. You quickly typed out:

You: REALLY gotta go! Talk to ya later maybe!

You then pocketed your phone, “Yeah. Sorry. Find him?”

Maria pinched the bridge of her nose, “He was drunk in the lobby. We’ll go on without him. Let’s get going!”

You nodded and followed your boss back onto set to capture the models promoting the latest Gucci handbag line.

Y/N, as Bucky had found out, seemed like they were having a more interesting day than he was. He, indeed, arrive to work thirty minutes later and was greeted to his business partner, Sam Wilson.

“Wilson, how’s Fury holdin’ up?”

“Not good, man. He looks even more dissatisfied! And I didn’t even think that was possible!”

Bucky followed Sam to the conference room and snorted, “Calm down. I’ll handle it.” Before entering the room, he took a deep breath. He then pushed the door open and smiled, “Mr. Fury! Sorry to make you wait so long. New York traffic and all.”

Fury stood up and amusingly shook Bucky’s hand, “I’ll let it slide, but don’t let it happen again. I’m a very busy man, Barnes.”

Bucky nodded, “Yes, of course, sir.” He gestured to the chairs, “Shall we?” He sat down and then pulled out the needed files for his and Sam’s presentation. Sam did mostly the talking. Bucky sat back and watched, occasionally stepping in to add more detail or correct Sam, but it seemed like it was going smoothly.

As Sam continued to talk, Bucky’s attention was pulled away when he started receiving messages from you.

Unknown number: Figured you’d like an update on Brock.

Unknown number: We found him in the lobby.

Unknown number: Drunk.

Unknown number: That asshole thinks just because he’s a model in New York, he can do whatever he wants.

Bucky: Wait, are you in New York?

Unknown number: Maybe....wbu mystery dude? dudette?

Bucky: I live and work in New York.

Unknown number: Wow! I wonder if we ran into each other at some point.

Bucky: So you ARE in New York.

Unknown number: shit...

Bucky: Gotcha. Anyway, I hardly doubt it. It’s a big city after all.

Unknown number: Truuuuue!

Bucky: So whe-

“Barnes!” Bucky’s head shot up to see Sam and Fury looking at him expectantly.

He cleared his throat, “Sorry, family business going on. Anyway, whaddya say, Mr. Fury? Sound like a good plan?”

Fury stood up and buttoned his jacket, “Yes. Start production by the end of next week. A prototype should be made and ready by Stark’s Expo.”

“You got it, sir! We won’t let you down!” Sam said as he escorted Fury out of the conference room. When he was out of sight, Sam and Bucky fist bumped, “Booyah! That’s what I’m talkin’ about!”

Bucky chuckled, “Good job, man.”

“Why were you so distracted during the whole thing, though? I’m a bit offended.”

“Family business, like I said.”

Sam looked unconvinced, “Uh huh. Yeah, fine. Don’t tell me. That’s fine. I’m just your best friend and all.”

Bucky shoved Sam away, “Shut up. It’s nothing. I promise.” he then said his “see you later” to him and went to his own office. He sat down and pulled out his phone and texted you back.

Bucky: So where do you work?

Unknown number: Why should I tell you? You might stalk me or even kill me!

Bucky: I’m too lazy for that. But fine. Since I know your name, I’ll give you mine. I’m Bucky.

Unknown number: What kind of weird ass name is that?

Bucky: It’s a nickname that comes from my middle name.

Unknown number: okaaaay??

Bucky: Now can I know where you work?

Unknown number: Lemme think….nope! Anyway, I gotta go. Pictures to take an all that.

Bucky: You’ll give some day. You just wait!

Part 3

RPWN TAGGING: @wishrains @learisa @lowkeysebby @moniquikiki

#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky x reader #au #marvel #wrong number au

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organictaeyong · 7 years ago

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boyfriend!chanyeol

• okay so as far as im concerned park chanyeol is 100% boyfriend material • ((@ me if you want)) • you literally could not hope for more in a boyfriend • the most loving boy there ever was perhaps • so so so so much love to give • and loves to show you however he can just how much he loves you • whether it’s by doing something extravagant like writing you a song • ((something he’s done multiple times)) • or something as simple as giving you his jacket when it’s cold out • and you’ve forgotten to bring your own • ((something you’ve done multiple times)) • like you’ll never be able to doubt that boy’s love and devotion to you • is also not afraid at all to show it in front of the other members • which like • sometimes they lowkey wish he was • because it’s all well and good when it’s something like him pulling you to sit on his lap • when you’re over at the dorm to watch a film or something • but jongdae is getting sick and tired of the two of you making heart eyes at each other and trading kisses in the morning when everyone’s tryna get their breakfast

• “”haha guys why don’t you stop before I literally throw up :-)))”” • sehun almost did throw up when he came into the kitchen one morning to find the two of you making out against the fridge • it left the maknae scarred for life • and junmyeon banned pda from the dorm • ((which leads to you and Chanyeol making a game of it)) • (((how far can you push it before the two of you get caught and junmyeon gets mad))) • ((((the answer is surprisingly far)))) • (((((junmyeon doesn’t wanna get in the way of love, no matter how much it might disgust the other members))))) • the type to always be missing you • doesn’t matter if you were just with him five minutes ago • he’s already looking forward to being with you again • get used to your phone being spammed with texts whenever he has free time • texts about how much he misses you • what he’s doing on his day off • how you should be doing it with him • the occasional picture of baekhyun • he’s not overbearing though • and tbh you’ve kind of grown fond of all the messages telling you about how much he loves you • like if that aint an ego boost what is • but no for real • it’s nice to know that he’s thinking about you • because you’re thinking about him all the time too • catch him hugging you for a solid ten minutes every time before he leaves to go promote with exo • has to be dragged away by the other members • “”good gOD you guys are gonna be seeing each other in like 24 hours get a grip”” • ((kyungsoo swears he’s gonna literally fight chanyeol next time he does it)) • is lowkey always touching you • whether it’s an arm around your shoulders • a hand on your waist • or like even his legs on your lap • just loves being close to you ???? • makes excuses to get closer like all the time • “”y/n if we don’t hold hands you could get lost in the crowd ??? is that what you want ??? do you want to get lost ???”” • “”yes it was 100% necessary for me to pull you onto my lap,, can you not see the bus getting more crowded y/n?? im just trying to save space for the elderly”” • “”hold still y/n you’ve got something on your bottom lip--- no!! don’t wipe it off, I got it, I swear!!” • lowkey wants everyone to know you’re his • so you know this giant dork loves seeing you in his clothes • the first time he saw you in one of his shirts he turned such a bright shade of red you thought there was something wrong with him • turns out he just thought you looked really really good • cue the start of Chanyeol “””accidentally””” leaving items of his clothing at your place for you to wear • “”oh is that my hoodie y/n??? haha I had no !! idea !!! I’d left that here!!! :-)))”” • “”…..chanyeol are you okay I literally saw you slip it into my wardrobe yesterday??? I was in the room ???”” • he just thinks you look really cute in his clothes ??? • because like • the boy is about 287367 feet tall • his shirts absolutely drown you ??? • but you love it because they’re so !! damn !! comfy !! • and also smell exactly like chanyeol • which is a plus because you don’t feel so lonely when he’s away with exo • so you guys lowkey set up a system • where you’ll wear his stuff until it stops smelling like him • and then you’ll return it • for him to bring it back a week or so later • smelling like him again • (((jongdae found out and was disgusted by y’all))) • ((((did not hesitate to let everyone else know so they could mock chanyeol for being so whipped)))) • don’t be fooled by his sweetness though • he loves to tease you • usually it’s in connection to your height difference • because lbr most people are shorter than chanyeol • but he loves that you are • it means he can do things like put stuff he doesn’t want you to reach on top of shelves • or hold things above his head when you ask him to pass you something • ((something that stopped being funny for you like the first time he did it,,, but he still thinks it’s one of the funniest things to ever happen every single time)) • but it also means he can do other things • like rest his chin on top of your head when you cuddle • or press kisses to your forehead • ((don’t forget him using you as a human armrest,,, another favourite of his)) • basically he doesn’t mind using his height to his advantage • you don’t mind all that much • it means piggyback rides whenever you’re tired of walking • ((he doesn’t even complain, just helps you get comfy on his back)) • but it also means that chanyeol is the designated big spoon • and you’re convinced there’s no better feeling than when he’s pressed up against your back with his arms around you • like that’s when you feel most at home • and he loves it too • ((though sometimes he gets pouty and whines until you swap positions)) • (((the boy just loves being the small spoon))) • okay so dates with chanyeol are fun • he is thoughtful boy #1 and you can be sure that he’s put his everything into making sure it’s a good date • even if the two of you are just chilling at home and watching movies • like he’s gone all out getting in your favourite snacks, your favourite movies, making sure the other members are out the dorm • you name it, he has it covered • ((can’t stop baekhyun sneaking back into the dorm to crash the date though)) • (((it’s nothing you’re not used to,, dating chanyeol is lowkey like dating baekhyun as well,, the boy is always around))) • he just likes to take care of you • and honestly you like being taken care of • but sometimes the roles have to be reversed • usually when chanyeol holes himself up in his studio • you’ll know it’s one of those days because his phone will be off, and you won’t be able to get through to him • but one of the members will text you • and you’ll promise to go check on him • so you’ll take him food, in case he hasn’t eaten, and something to drink • most of the time you’ll just sit with him and watch him work • maybe take something with you that you can work on at the same time • it’s lowkey really nice just sitting in silence with him • the two of you doing your own things • every now and then he might slip the headphones from his own ears and place them over yours • and just watches your reaction when he plays you whatever he’s been working on • ((can’t stop the blinding smile that he sends your way when you tell him that it’s really good)) • (((which it usually is))) • and then you slip into silence again • but it’s comfortable ?? like you never thought you’d be able to say that but it is • actual days off with chanyeol are even better • one of your favourite memories with him is building a blanket fort in your living room • and just lying in there • talking about everything and nothing all at once • eventually falling asleep to chanyeol talking about whether or not he thought aliens actually existed • ((he did)) • waking up the following morning completely tangled up together • to the point where you couldn’t tell where your limbs ended and his began • and just snuggling further into his chest and going back to sleep • was probably one of the best days of your life lowkey • okay so unrelated but you can bet that thoughtful boy #1 park chanyeol has memorised every single anniversary you guys have • whether it’s first kiss • first date • first argument • first ““I love you”” • he knows them all off by heart • and tries to celebrate all of the ones that he can • ((you make him tone it down,, no one needs to celebrate like 46 anniversaries in a single year)) • he’s the king of giving gifts • somehow manages to knock it out of the park year after year • definitely favours gifts that have a personal touch,, it’s almost guaranteed that most of your cards are handmade • and you can always tell that a lot of thought has been put into choosing/making your gift • but your favourite will forever be the cd he made you • that was full of all the songs he’d written for you over the years • ((along with some new ones you’d never heard before)) • honestly you cried for like a week afterwards • it’s lowkey your most prized possession • sometimes you feel like maybe chanyeol deserves better because how can you even compete with something like that • but he reassures you every other day that honestly he’d be content with just your company for the rest of his life maybe • because he loves you and you love him and that’s all that matters to him • ((suddenly im crying I love park chanyeol)) • fights with him are pretty much non-existent • he’s so easy going that it’s hard to find things to get mad about • but they do happen every now and then • and when they do they get intense pretty quickly • lots of yelling • but they’re also really quick to blow over • because usually you’re arguing about something really silly anyway,, like chanyeol forgetting to let you know he’d gotten back safely after promoting overseas • or you accidentally putting a red sock in with his white shirt that he wanted to wear • just stupid things ?? and you’re quickly wondering why you were even yelling in the first place ??? • chanyeol is usually the first to apologise because he seems to catch on quicker than you that it really isn’t worth it • but you both promise that to be more understanding of each other • and that you won’t do whatever it is you were fighting because of again • 9 times out of 10 you actually stick to it • even when you don’t it blows over pretty quick • honestly dating chanyeol is lowkey the best experience • full of lots of love and affection • and pda that leaves everyone annoyed at how fluffy the two of you are • (mostly jongdae tbh,, but that boy just likes to complain) • ((chanyeol swears its bc he’s bitter about being single)) • (((jongdae swears its bc the two of you are just disgusting with your love))) • ((((baekhyun swears its bc chanyeol is just disgusting)))) • it’s essentially just like being in the honeymoon period • but for the entirety of your relationship • and tbh you wouldn’t have it any other way

#boyfriend!series #boyfriend!chanyeol #exo scenarios #chanyeol scenario #kpop scenarios #admin peach #I think this is probably the longest thing ive ever written #nd I lowkey want death #but god I love Chanyeol #headcanon

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pinkbelugacollective · 7 years ago

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On Suzuki-gun and Zack Sabre Jr.’s Place in the Stable

Alright real talk, I'm not liking one bit of Zack Sabre Jr.'s kayfabe story in New Japan. Lemme be clear- Suzuki-gun has been in existence in New Japan longer than Zack has been with the goddamn company. The faction has showed up across different promotions, and is run by a freelancer who will wrestle everyone and everything, including but not limited to- men, women, rookies, kaijuu, and what have you. Minoru Suzuki is arguably the top draw of the faction as he is... Minoru fucking Suzuki. Everyone else in the faction is either a loyal brother or son or fan, and we are all.... Suzuki-gun. The faction is arguably the only faction in New Japan that is truly heel, and it works because Misu is top dog and his brothers and sons are, essentially, his family. Where he goes, they go, and whenever he needs them... they're there. They're ready to throw down at literally a moment's notice, and nothing gets a crowd more heated than when Taichi's fucking with a babyface in order to help out Misu.

Now, I get Sabre Jr. is new to the promotion. Not only that, he didn't exactly have anyone to teach him the ropes that quickly before the G1, so to put him in a steady faction like Suzuki-gun was essentially the best way to get him assimilated into the promotion and get used to its style and kayfabe storytelling. It made perfect sense for Desperado to corner for him throughout the entirety of the 27th G1. He's the baby of the family, essentially their shogun's newest child, Desperado had to look after him because thiw family's ride or die. It was perfect storytelling throughout the whole summer. Desperado had Zack's back every match, and Zack did what he could during their tag bouts, but most of the caretaking was largely performed by El Desperado.

Now this is where it gets fucked up, and why Gedo better get it the fuck together before I sue his ass for misrepresentation. A whole portion of this year's Destruction tour was getting Suzuki-gun back into the larger storyline in New Japan, since they swapped them out for LIJ after Misu won the NEVER title, and to showcase enough of the LIJ bonds in time for Naito's victory at the G1 Climax. A lot of people, including myself, have had doubts about where Suzuki-gun's headed because Misu's not 40 anymore. He's not 35, he's not even 45. He's legit aboutta turn fifty, he's lost a lot of weight over the years, and we can see that he's getting worn down. We can see it in how he plans out his matches, how he performs with outside weaponry and interference, and how he takes and executes strikes and grapples in his matches. He's strong and healthy, but he's still a victim to time like we all are. He can't keep going forever, and eventually, the shogun's gonna have to move into a more administrative post and position a new heavyweight representative in the faction.

And unfortunately, it seems like Zack's gonna be the one groomed for the position.

First things first, I have nothing against Zack Sabre Jr. He's a great wrestler, very interesting to watch, but for the life of me, I don't understand what the fuck he's doing in Suzuki-gun. Part of the narrative of Suzuki-gun is that these men follow Misu because they're lacking something within themselves and find peace, find familiarity and comfort in being Misu's brother or son. Desperado's recent interview was one of the sweetest promos he's produced in his tenure in the faction, because it just comes off so... honest. Suzuki-gun is for life. Shelton Benjamin, despite being in WWE, is still Suzuki-gun. Takayama will never wrestle again but he is, for life, Suzuki-gun. That's how the faction is set up in the kayfabe. They're the family that ride or die into the sunset. There's no hesitation here.

What happened in Hiroshima a few days ago had me heated for several reasons. One- booking Suzuki-gun includes booking all of Suzuki-gun. Because Suzuki-gun is a steady stable. Their members are brought into the fold personally, you don't apply for a bloody position. Having Michi come out to just slap the mat in the corner does nothing because that's how you book the other stables. Facing a member of Suzuki-gun means facing all of Suzuki-gun. So I did not, for my life, understand why in Fukushima you had the Killer Elite Squad and Uncle Iizuka roll out after hours to push Misu to victory... but in Hiroshima, you booked Michi to do nothing while Kushida broke Desperado's arm and Back to the Future'd him into submission.

And yet, in that same night in Hiroshima, almost the entirety of the faction came out to help Zack.

I am pissed. Y'all could say whatever you want about the faction being a joke because it's just “Misu and the jobbers,” but Michi literally has his own promotion and just put on a supercard show to celebrate his own damn anniversary as a wrestler, Taichi's good because he's tight with both Misu and Michi, Kanemaru is a junior heavyweight legend outside of New Japan, Shelton Benjamin is another legend, KES are a credible threat in the tag division, Takayama is the Emperor, Desperado is an underdog, and Zack is basically the darling of technical wrestling. No one in the faction is an actual jobber, and to presume as such is straight disrespect and I hope y'all have nightmares about Misu chasing you around in a haunted forest with Taichi's microphone cane if you think this kind of disrespect is warranted.

But I digress- Suzuki-gun is an army of men (and women, because Miho and Ayumi Nakamura are very much Suzuki-gun) who live and breathe the creed. They can throw down when appropriate, and back off when they have to. Gedo booked two amazing Suzuki-gun storms during Misu/Elgin and Sabre Jr./Tanahashi.... and yet Gedo refused to book it into Desperado/Kushida. Taichi and Kanemaru, even tho they lost to Funky Future, at least had each other to depend on, but they booked Michi, and independent legend in his own right, to just valet in the corner while Desperado got bodied.

Bruh. Bruh!!!

ALL I'M GONNA SAY IS THIS- Suzuki-gun aint no fuckin joke, and if Gedo don't get his shit the fuck together, I have no problems pretending Sabre Jr. doesn't exist in the faction. Sabre Jr has yet to appropriately storm someone outta no where on behalf of the faction. Maybe Hiroshima wasn't the best time because he was main eventing against one of the best wrestlers of our generation, but I got my eyes on him. Gedo booked almost the whole faction and its leader to come out and support Zack. They just had Michi escort Desperado out after he pretty much got his ass handed to him.

If Zack Sabre Jr. don't storm Kushida, or whoever the fuck Desperado aboutta feud with soon, then he out. He's cancelled- deleted! If he doesn't participate in the next round of group beatdowns, he's not invited to the cookouts anymore! Gedo can't act like we don't see what he's doing with New Japan, with all the international white talent dropping into the ranks while native wrestlers are watching this shit like “hm.” You can't fuck with the head booker, but the head booker better remember that it’s Kazuchika Okada who's the reigning Ace, not Kenneth Omega. He better remember that Kushida already bodied William Ospreay enough times to never have to agree to a match with him ever again, and yet, our boy might have to wrestle him yet again. We see you, Gedo. We know why you're doing it, but don't think, for a second, that viewers and wrestlers alike aint takin notes.

Tl;dr: Zack Sabre Jr is officially on the shitlist. I don't give a fuck if he graduated to official membership in the squad because he got the black-and-white Suzuki-gun gear, you not Suzuki-gun if you aint reppin yer boys in a group beatdown. You not Suzuki-gun if you not comin outta nowhere and smacking a mothafucka with a clipboard and choking him out with a steel chair just to buy your fellow Suzuki-gun mate some time. Zack been coddled enough. It's time to square up, or drop the Suzuki-gun name, cuz what we not aboutta do, is give this boy some merch to rep while he don't do shit for its members who are clearly struggling in the booking department.

Either book Zack the way Suzuki-gun has always been booked, or put him somewhere else. We not here to play games. If there’s a successor in mind for Misu’s position, then Gedo better find someone who’s actually gonna rep the whole band and push it over the moon. Just cuz they’re not invading NOAH anymore doesn’t mean they’re irrelevant. @ Gedo and Zack, we see y’all and we aint boo boo the fool.

#minoru suzuki #njpw #zack sabre jr #el desperado #suzuki gun #real talk #wrestling

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cashmierathoughts · 7 years ago

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Riley ‘Nem Saturday Night Part3

I woke up Saturday morning with one thing on my mind.. I did NOT want to go to this pajama party. But I’d already told Keesha that I would go. Plus, I always reneged so I figured I might as well keep my word. Before I could finish my thoughts on the matter, my phone rang; it was Keesha facetiming me. I reluctantly answered.

Keesh: “Rise and shiiinnnne”, sang an annoying and off-key voice.

“Now what I tell you about unscheduled facetimes? You lucky I answered, wassup?”.

Keesh: “Yo grumpy ass. Sounds like somebody didn’t get no dick last niiighht.. haa!”.

(I rolled my eyes, irritated because she was right but I laughed it off.)

Keesh: “..I was calling ‘cause I need you to run to the mall with me real quick so I can find us something to wear to this pawrty [party] tonight!”, she continued.

“..and what makes you think I don’t already have something to wear?”.

Keesh: “Girl, whatever you do have, I’m sure it’s whack, so you might as well bring dat ass.”

“You’re right”, I snickered. “Okay, we can go to the mall, but I was actually gonna get a workout in before. You wanna meet me at the gym and we can go after?”. I already knew what Keesh would say, but I liked to guilt trip her anyway. You see, Keesh had BAWDY [body], always had, since we were in Jr. High. Anything she ate went to all the right places and it was that very reason alone that she did not work out. In her mind, she didn’t have to. I partially agreed.

Keesh: “Soooo.. what you saying is for me to meet you at your house when you’re done working out? Bet.”

“Shaking my head.. alright man, bye.”

I headed over to NappyHeads Gym to get a few circuits in. Once I was done, I went home with hopes of running a hot shower but not to my surprise, there was no hot water. Wet footprints mapped the hallway and led a trail to Jordyn’s bedroom. She was always using up the last of everything: the last egg, the last bit of detergent, the last roll of toilet paper, everything!

While I waited, I plugged my phone up to the aux and put my music on shuffle as I prepared to clean up. There was nothing like cleaning up to your very own soundtrack. To be honest, I would find any reason to listen to music. My love for music was unparalleled to any other emotion I’d ever felt, even that of being in love. Love lets you down. Music picked me up. It was the best high I’d ever felt, outside of actually being high and listening to ‘Footsteps in the Dark’ live. So I did the dishes, wiped down the counters, and swept the kitchen floor. When I was finished, I went to check the shower water to see if it was warm enough to bathe in. Fail. It was still cold. I was annoyed, yet content because as I was wiping down the counters and the appliances, I came across one of my emergency joints stashed away in a tin-tea can labeled “Natural Greenery”.

I usually didn’t indulge, but my baby brother sold weed and would always leave me these “stress relievers” hidden around the house. It just so happens that I came across this one today. I wasn’t necessarily stressed, but it had been a minute since I got stoned, so I lit the tail of the joint and watched the orangish embers flicker as the length of the spliff diminished. I could feel the wrinkles in my forehead vanish with each inhale. Not much longer after, I was high.

I stretched out upside down on the couch and let my head hang floppily inches away from the ground as my ponytail lightly swept the faux cherrywood floor boards. I let out a deep sigh and just as I was slipping into total relaxation, I heard a knock at the front door. I pretended to ignore it, hoping Jordyn would get it, but when she didn’t, I slowly rolled onto the floor, picked myself up off the ground and sluggishly made my way to the door.

“Who is it..?”, I asked. The peephole was covered up so I couldn’t tell who it was. I was already paranoid and high, so when the respondent’s voice was a few octaves lower than I was anticipating, I was slightly alarmed.

“Brian”, responded a man’s voice.

“Who?”, I repeated, because I thought I heard the foreign voice say ‘Brian’, but then again, I wasn’t in my right state of mind so I had to be sure.

“Brian, girl. Now open up the door.”

At that moment, I knew exactly who it was, and it wasn’t no damn Brian. It was Keesha. I took off the latch, unbolted the top lock, and opened the door, greeting her with a stale face.

With a massive grin on face and in a taunting tone, Keesha said, “Tell the truth, you thought I was Brian huh?”.

Truth is, I did think it was Brian. You see, Brian was my ex and was the sole example and definition of where the term ‘ex’ came from. I had recently EXcommunicated that nigga from my life, EXfoliated his touch from every inch of my body, and EXchanged his drama for EXhalation. To make a long story short, Brian dogged me out; but I should have known better, everybody knows ‘Brian’ is a cheating-ass name anyway.

“You lucky I opened the door”, I answered, attempting to circumvent the topic.

“You ready?”, asked Keesh hastily.

“Yea, let me hop in the shower real quick”, I urged.

Keesh: “So thassa no..”

As I walked down the hallway, quickly stripping my clothes off layer by layer, I could hear Keesha already rummaging through the refrigerator, bottles clinging and all. I got out the shower and put my clothes on and then we headed for the mall.

When we arrived, Keesha dragged me to Love Culture. It was like being in a flea market mixed with Fashion Nova, mixed with a level three Rainbow. Basically, it wasn’t my style. I suppose my facial expression gave away my thoughts because as I was thumbing through the garments, Keesha grabbed my arm and said, “C’mon witcho bougie ass”, and lured me out of the store, bag in hand.

“I am not bougie”, I protested as I tried to hold back from laughing. “You know I’m allergic to polyester”.

She rolled her eyes and we found ourselves at the threshold of Victoria’s Secret. Now this was more of my speed. Lace teddies, satin robes, silk panties with the matching brassieres, babydolls, sheer French maid units, etc. Yes! I was home. Like most women, I enjoyed dressing up in my lingerie; it’s just that more recently I was finding fewer and fewer reasons to do so. I wasn’t exactly thrilled about buying lingerie for a party, but who was I to go against the dress code?

Keesha asked me what was my price range so that she could “help” me find something to wear and I mistakenly told her that I had an Angel’s Credit Card. I could see the emerald dollar signs illuminate in her eyes as her pupils dilated at the thought of having no spending limit. I knew I had fucked up. Several wardrobe changes later, I’d found my outfit for the evening. Either I actually liked what was selected for me, or I’d just given in and gotten tired of all the different materials and hypo-allergenic panty protectors rubbing my coochie the wrong way.

I parted ways with Keesh and planned to meet back up with her later on before the party. When I got back home, the house still smelled like the weed I had smoked earlier. I’d completely forgotten that I was high that day; that was one of the many effects that weed had on me. As I reached my room, hoping to duck off for an hour or two, Jordyn caught me in the hallway and started to tell me the story she told me every other week. Her nigga wasn’t acting right, blah, blah, blah.. And that’s not to say I didn’t care, because I did. Jordyn was my girl - we go back to St. Andrews Jr. High; but I had been hearing about this dusty nigga Robert for the past two years and was completely over it at this point.

Jordyn: “…yea girl so what you think?.. Hellooo? Riley!”, demanded Jordyn.

Everything she’d said since she got my attention fell on deaf ears.

“..Huh? Aw yea girl, fuck ‘em”, I managed to utter, pretending that I had been listening. That was a classic response and the closest and most general statement I could think to say, next to “that’s wild”. Everybody knows that when you say “that’s wild”, you’re not listening.

“Come out tonight with me and Keesh. We going to some pajama party on the north and Keesh knows the promoter so we not paying to get in”, I advertised.

Jordyn: “… I don’t know. I was probably gone stay in and catch up on my shows”, she reasoned.

“Really, Jordyn? Catch up on your shows? We can do that on Sunday after church like we always do. Go find something to wear! Victoria’s Secret is having a sale if you don’t have anything!”.

Jordyn: “Girl, I aint got no Victoria’s Secret money!”

“You’re right, Love Culture is more your speed”, I teased. We both laughed and she headed out for the mall and I to my room to take a nap. I was so exhausted and slipped into a mild kush coma.

I woke up, looked around for my phone, saw that it was 8:30pm, and went right back to sleep. I was trying to fight it, but the slumber was so satisfying - I couldn’t help but to submit to it.

Shortly after, I woke up again. A tickling sensation ventured up the side of my leg, past my knee, reaching my inner thigh, and finally halting at the folds in my skin most closest to my center. I could feel my warm hands getting lost in my creases. I slowly dilated my legs, allowing my hands to rest comfortably between them. I lie there, groping my breasts, pretending that my hands were his. I reached down and slid two fingers between my lips and wildly rotated them until I could feel the sensation of arousal. I slowed down to a carousel speed just as I was about to cum. I wanted to tease myself; at least that’s what I imagined Jake would do. I imagined he would pull my hair, so I grabbed myself by my thick wavy locks and tugged. I instantly got wetter. I inserted my longest digit while my index finger fondled my clit. I could feel myself about to arrive and although there was no one else in the room with me, I softly whispered, “I’m about to cum, I’m about to cum”. It grew to more than a whisper and before I knew it, my legs were cold from the soaked sheets. I rolled over onto my stomach and caught my breath.

I retrieved my panties from off my bedroom floor and headed for the bathroom to freshen up and get ready for this evenings festivities. No less than three minutes of me being in the bathroom, Jordyn bursts in all giggly and shit.

Jordyn: “Look what I found!”, she shrilled. It was a rose gold lace teddy with the heels to match.

“Oh my gosh, that’s bomb! Where’d you find that!?”, I questioned. She knew rose gold was one of my favorite colors, mostly because of how flattering it was on my sienna skin tone.

Jordyn: “..somewhere that’s more my speed",she sassed.

I pouted and negotiated a few unworn items in my closet, along with the lingerie that I’d bought earlier that day for her teddy. I was thrilled and actually couldn’t wait to go to the party. We finished getting ready and headed over to my Aunt Bernadine’s house to pick up Keesh.

Low and behold, once we’d gotten there, Keesha wasn’t ready. I opted to stay in the car and wait because I’ve found that when someone knows you’re outside with the car still running and you’re waiting on them, they tend to move a little faster. If you go in and wait, they think you have the time to spare or to get comfortable; two things that I did not have. Three songs later, my patience was thin and my nerves were few. Jordyn and I decided to go in and put some fire under Keesha’s ass. So much for my theory about waiting in the car.

Before we walked in, I had to give Jordyn the same rundown that I’d given her and anyone else that was not familiar with Aunt B’s house, before.

“Look, my Aunt Bernadine is nosey and outspoken and my Uncle Ray likes to act like he’s blind and pinch your ass and act like he was reaching for his cane. You ready? Let’s go.”

We walked up to the front porch and the boards under our feet creaked so loudly that there was no need to knock. I could hear Aunt B call out from behind the screen door,

“Keesha! Riley nem here. C’mon in y’all!”

As soon as we walked in, she started up.

Aunt B: “Hey Riley”, she said suspiciously. “How you been girl? Still workin’ for the man? ..puttin’ cigarettes in our black baby’s hands and liquor stores on our corners?”, she asked accusingly.

“Auntie B, that was ONE campaign, THREE years ago and there weren’t even any black people in the ad.”, I said defensively.

Aunt B: “Eggs-actly!”, she interrupted before I could even finish my sentence. “No blacks in the ad. As if that’s any better”.

Keesha appeared at the top of the stairs and yelled for us to come up. It was as if she could sense my agitation with her mother. As we were walking up the stairs, Aunt B yelled after us and said,

“Yo daddy still at home UNEMPLOYED while my sister going to work everyday?!”. It sounded more like a statement than a question. But I answered her anyway.

“He’s RETIRED Aunt B, not unemployed.” Man I couldn’t stand her hating ass.

We got to Keesha’s room and surprisingly, she was ready. Apparently, this entire time, she was waiting on the promoter to text her back about putting our names on the list. Personally, I didn’t like the sound of waiting on a promoter to put my name on a list but if I knew anything, I knew that Keesha was plugged, and more importantly; I knew how cheap my cousin was. She was not about to pay to get into a party.

Keesha opened the bottom drawer to her dresser and pulled out a fifth of 1800 Tequila. I cringed at the sight of it. I can’t remember a time that I’d drunk tequila and actually remembered the night before. It made me emotional and horny and those two things together can be deadly. I proceeded with caution. Two shots in and I decided that I didn’t want to be irresponsible that night and made a conscious decision to NOT get fucked up. Jordyn, being the responsible person that she was, offered to drive my car because she wasn’t drinking for whatever reason.

Keesha got the text confirming our free entry that we had been waiting on and we headed out. By this time, Aunt B and Uncle Ray were already in their room for the night so I didn’t have to worry about hearing any of her sideways remarks on our way out.

We pulled up to the spot. No, literally, the club was called, “The Spot”, and parked around back. I made sure Jordyn backed in because you never know if you’re going to have to make a quick getaway. ESPECIALLY on the north side!

When I stood up and got out the car, I felt myself get a little lightheaded. I began to add up the number of shots I’d taken that night in my head..two in Keesha’s room.. one on our way to the car.. well one and a half because Jordyn’s baby ass barely touched hers.. and one at the stoplight ‘cause my jam came on. Okay, so carry the one.. that’s about five. I’m good. I knew that it wouldn’t be wise to drink anymore that night so I asked Jordyn to make sure I didn’t get too lit.

We walked past the line and got right in. I could feel the jealousy radiating off the bystanders as they sized us up along the way. We were led to VIP by Keesha’s connect and to my surprise, the venue was actually decent. It wasn’t hot and muggy, but more importantly, even though everyone was half naked and dancing, it didn’t even smell like ass! I was impressed.

We sat down in an all white section and bottle service had already been delivered. Keesha poured three shots of VSOP Hennessy, one for each of us. I was reluctant to drink mine. There are two reasons why I was hesitant on taking this shot: 1. It would put me at six shots for the night, even though I didn’t even feel drunk. And 2. I had already been drinking light.

“Keesh, should we really be drinking dark? I mean, we’ve already been drinking tequila”, I yelled over the music.

She looked at me dead n the eyes and knocked her shot back. What a savage.

Keesha: “Thassa myth cuz. Now drink that shit”, she urged.

I obediently followed suit and drank. Keesh grabbed me by the arm and pulled me out onto the dance floor. I looked back at Jordyn, pleading with my eyes that she would save me; but she failed me and only smiled a devious smile that told me she knew exactly what kind of night we were in for… a “cousin Keesha” type of night. One of her reckless nights that my momma would usually call me gossiping about the next day.

We maneuvered our way though the crowd, unmarked hands grabbing at our asses and tugging at our silk robes as we slid by, and came to a standstill right in the middle of the party. Great. The middle of the crowd is the worst place to be, in my opinion. The DJ dropped a slow record and I nervously looked around as everyone around me was partnering up and grinding on one another. Including Keesha. She got snatched up quick. I could feel the wolves’ eyes on me as I helplessly looked for a way out. I was definitely feeling all six of those shots by now. Beads of sweat trickled down my back so I loosened my robe and let it drop to my waist, exposing my rose gold lingerie. I could almost immediately feel the difference in the room’s temperature.

I looked around and caught the gaze of this fine amber skinned man across the room. Unforgetful that I was half naked in a party, I imagined that this is what Diamond felt like that first night she danced at the Player’s Club.

The stranger made his way across the room, his eyes never breaking our mutual stare. We had an unspoken agreement that when he reached me, I’d give him a dance and possibly a little conversation. But as he got closer, there was something familiar about his strut.. and those broad shoulders. Oh shit! What the hell was he doing here? It was JAKE!

TBC

#RileyNem shortstory cashmierathoughts BGWB

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