#i actually drew this back in 2021 and only finished it now | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

queen-of-the-avengers · 3 months ago

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My One and Only, My Lifeline

Pairing: NASCAR!Steve Rogers x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.6k

Warnings: angst, crash and injuries

Summary: Steve is a famous NASCAR driver who finds the thrill in driving at high speeds. You’re there at every one of his races, praying that he’ll make it out without injury. Sometimes, God doesn’t answer prayers and then the worst happens.

Squares Filled: "I'm just trying to sound tough" (2021) for @star-spangled-bingo

Author’s Note: i saw this video on tiktok and i immediately drew inspiration for it. go check it out!

One of the most dangerous jobs in your opinion is race car driving like NASCAR, but your boyfriend is very skilled at it. He has always had a passion for racing even when he was a teenager. There were underground racing groups that would take their precious muscle cars and go so far out of town that there wouldn’t ever be people on the road to crash into. Hundreds of kids would gather to watch the race and almost all of them would place bets on the best driver, that being Steve.

Steve claimed he loved the thrill of it but you know the fame was a big part of it to. He felt untouchable. Everyone tried racing him but he had all the best things. It didn’t help his dad was the best mechanic in town that would often supply Steve with the best parts. Still, Steve didn’t need it. He had raw talent on his side.

There was this one time when Steve’s opponent got so mad that he lost against him that he declared a rematch but the driver had to pick who got to drive their car. He picked someone he thought was the best while Steve immediately went to you. You have never driven like he does a day in your life but he trusted you to drive his car without question.

He sat in the passenger seat and watched you with heart eyes as you drove as smoothly as he did. The cops were called about the illegal racing and came to shut it down, and you passed by the finish line and continued driving away. The cops almost nailed you two but you made a swift escape by outrunning a train. There was an opening that Steve didn’t think you’d make but you proved him wrong that night.

It was thrilling but it was something you never wanted to do again. You’d leave that for Steve to do.

Eventually, he moved out of state with you and applied for NASCAR. It took him a long time to actually drive on the track and when he did, he impressed everyone. His rise to fame was fast, almost too fast for you to keep up. Before, you’d go out with him to the store without issue. Now, you can’t go anywhere without women falling head over heels for him or men asking him to sign things.

It makes Steve happy so you don’t say anything about it. It could be worse but you often wish that things could go back to underground racing and running from the cops.

You walk into the area with your laminated VIP pass slung over your neck like a necklace. From Steve’s first race to now, you have never missed one. Even when you were in the hospital for a broken leg, you still found a way to cheer him on from the stands. Steve’s been part of the same pit crew for years so they all know you like you’re part of their little family. They allow you to be with the crew because you’re always out of their way.

All you want to do is support your man as close as you can get.

“Hey, Tony!” you greet the man responsible for designing Steve’s car. Tony took a shot at Steve years ago and has been his sponsor ever since. “How’s Pepper?”

“At home with Morgan. I told her she could come but she didn’t want Morgan around here.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t want a six-year-old here either.”

“You’re here.” You turn around and see Steve jogging over to you. “I’m just about to go out.”

“Go kill it, baby,” you grin.

He kisses you twice--once because he loves you and one more for good luck. He slides his helmet on and hops into his car through the window since the doors don’t open. Cars don’t have any opening doors to protect the drivers in case they crash. They can roll safely knowing a door won’t open and they’d be ejected from it. You fear for Steve’s life whenever he gets into that car and pray that he makes it through this race unscathed.

It’s worked so far… until it doesn’t.

Steve slides into his car and does the pre-race checkup with his pit crew before driving over to the group of cars that are already driving slowly along the track. They do that as they wait for everyone to prepare for it. As soon as everyone is in line, they set up the starting line witht he large green flag in the air. Just like how a flip is switched, every single driver presses on the accelerator and the race is on.

It’s hard to determoine who will come out on top in the beginning os everyone is fair game. It’s only until they reach the mid-mark that people start to get an idea of who is going to come in the first five spots. Steve pulls into the pit area and stops so his crew can give the car fuel and change his tires all at an alarming speed. It amazes you how quickly his team works.

You sit with your elbows on your knees and rub your hands together from how nervous you are. Cars race by in the blink of an eye, round and round they go. This race is three hundred and twelve laps and Steve just passed the three hundred mark. The race is nearly done and he is neck and neck with his biggest opponent, Baron Zemo.

“Y/N, he wants to talk to you.”

You get up and take the headset from one of the crew members, Bucky.

“Steve?”

“Baby, talk to me. Give me words of encouragement.”

“You can do this, Steve. I’m so proud of you and I’ll be proud of you no matter the outcome.”

“No, do better.”

“Uh… Oh! If you don’t win this, I’m going to leave you for another man.”

“No man will ever get the chance to touch you,” he smirks.

“Go kill it, baby.”

“You know I will.”

You take the headset off and hand it back to Bucky. Eleven laps to go.

Ten.

Nine.

Eight.

You’re standing on the edge where the concrete barricade is. It feels like your head is going to explode from the lack of oxygen because you’re holding your breath in anticipation. If you even blink, you fear you’ll miss it.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Nearly there. Steve and Zemo are neck and neck as they come across the final three laps. You’re not sure which one is going to win. One half of the audience is cheering for Steve while the other half is rooting for Zemo.

Three.

Two.

You prayed for tonight to go according to plan but not all prayers reach God. There are some that fall through the cracks, this time, it’s yours. It’s the last lap and it’s clear that Zemo isn’t going to win this one. He does the one thing that would ensure his first place prize. All it takes it one swerve of his car and Steve gets thrown off balance. His car is slammed into concrete wall before swerving toward the grass. It flips twice and comes to a screeching halt.

Time slows down for you. Nothing else matters but your boyfriend. You open your mouth and scream his name but you don’t hear it. You heave yourself over the concrete barricade and sprint right into the tracks. The crew members try grabbing at you to keep you from running onto the tracks with dozens of racecars.

Silence befalls the audience as they watch with horror from the accident. Not even Zemo’s side are cheering for his run. Everyone saw what he did. He betrayed Steve and causes him to crash just so he could get the nearly eight million dollars. You take a step onto the track and almost get knocked back by cars speeding past you.

You find your first opening and run across the track as fast as you can before the next wave of cars can come. Thirty feet before you get to Steve’s car, the engine blows up in flames. Reality comes rushing at you at full speed.

“Steve!”

HIs pit crew is already trying to make their way over to help but you’re not sure what they can do about the smoke bellowing out of the car. You get on your knees and look through the open window to see him coughing inside.

“Steve! Grab my hand!”

Steve looks at you with dazed eyes. He must have hit his head on the ceiling. He struggles to get into a position that can slide him right out of the car but he doesn’t stop trying. You reach in to help but your arm touches the hot, hot metal of the dashboard. You hiss in pain but ignore it because Steve is top priority.

Bucky grabs your shoulder and gently moves you out of the way so that he and the crew can get him out. They’re better qualified than you are. Bucky pulls Steve out of the car only moments before the rest of the car gos up in flames. He has scratches to his leg and bruising on his face but you think he’ll be okay.

“Y/N, are you nuts? You could have gotten yourself killed.”

“You’re bleeding, Steve.”

“I’m okay.” He winces from pain which means he’s clearly not okay. “Okay, I’m just trying to sound tough. You really shouldn’t have come out here. It was stupid.”

“Nothing is stupid when it comes to you. I thought… I can’t lose you, Steve.”

Steve stays seated on the ground and waits for the paramedics to come and you sit right nex to him to keep him company. Steve grabs your hand and notices the burn on your forearm.

“Shit, Y/N, you’re burned. You could have died.”

“So could you. Your life is tied to mine. If you die, then I die.”

Steve kisses you quickly to assure you that he’s going to be okay.

“I can’t die now,” he chuckles painfully. “Winning means nothing if you’re not next to me.”

Want to be tagged? Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

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hypersomniagame · 10 months ago

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HYPERSOMNIA JANUARY DEV LOG : "LOG 1, WOOHOO!"

Hi! For all of you who follow HYPERSOMNIA, or are just stopping by, let me introduce you to this post to really set the tone.

For 2024, I am going to try to release a dev log about HYPERSOMNIA once a month, may come earlier, may come a little late, but I'm doing this to help give insight on to how the game is going, and to give me motivation to work on the game.

First things first, big news!

HYPERSOMNIA IS NOW AVAILABLE TO WISHLIST ON STEAM! (LINK)

After a while of back and forwarding with Valve, I've finally got a Steam page to call my own, and MAN is it bizarre seeing my weird little RPG in my Steam library. Like, that's my logo, and my key art, and screenshots of MY game, that's so weird. It doesn't feel real. BUT IT IS!

And, I would really really really really really appreciate it if you would consider wishlisting the game on Steam. It helps with the algorithm, and my happiness because I like seeing numbers go up, it feels good.

I even drew this as a announcement/commemoration for the page going live.

(P.S; if you couldn't tell, I really like Half-Life, it's one of my favorite game series.)

Secondly...

A new trailer is in the works! We were accepted for this year's MOTHER Direct (4th time baby, whoo!)

The trailer has been coming along well, I hope to show more battle oriented clips that I've missed the last few years, like special moves.

Can you believe I've never actually gotten to adding those in the game? I mean, they come set-up in default RPG Maker projects but I've never gotten around to revamping them until now, year 4 of engine work. Isn't that strange?

I also hope to improve on editing in the trailers. Whenever I finish a trailer I come back a few months later to notice minor points where I was kinda sloppy.

I'm not much of a video editor, (I only learned so I could edit trailers on my own) but I'd like to keep them at a good presentable quality. You gotta have standards with that kinda stuff, it's important!

OK, TIME FOR THE ACTUAL GAME STUFF. HERE WE GO.

Abilities are now implemented! And work! Wahoo!

In HYPERSOMNIA, players are able to switch abilities between party members. I find this a really interesting mechanic for how simple it seems, you get to choose who plays what role in your party. I think this is HUGE, and opens up a lot of unique scenarios for the game's encounters. I've had this planned for years, as far back as 2021 if I can recall, so it's super cool seeing it in game.

Mapping is being worked on!

I've also been working on mapping out more areas of the game! The forest part you hopefully saw in the last trailer is almost completely mapped. I've been working on the second part to it and am hoping to finish it sometime soon.

Mapping forests really suck. THOUGH, almost all the maps for the first chapter of the game are done! That's just another step closer to the demo. (Which, FYI, will be on Steam and Itch! ^^)

I've also been working on re-spriting older scenes!

This one's been really fun to do, I've been going back and redoing older stuff from the 2022 trailer, like this train! It's weird seeing it side by side, because you can definitely see where it's come from but at the same time, it looks so different.

(Also side note, these sprites are CRUSTY! EWWW!)

Lastly, Script and Music updates!

The script for HYPERSOMNIA's first act has been completed! with just 37 pages of just cutscene dialog alone! We're also currently working on wrapping up NPC dialog! Not much else to say.

And music is being worked on!

Music has been making some progress! I like to lay out demo's for areas I'm mapping out to help make both the music and scene come together. (Also, to help break up the eerie silence when playtesting...)

Speaking of music, FIREBALL, the games main battle theme, was recently delisted on our YouTube channel.

We did this because we decided we wanted to resample FIREBALL, and found that it's best to not have the song uploaded until a complete, final version is made. At least for the demo, it could possibly change before the final game but that's a bit too far in the future for me to think about fully.

Hey! Thanks for reading the whole dev log! Unless you just skipped to the end, you should probably go back up and read it. there's a steam page now. and some cool ross art at the top. you're missing out!

I hope this was like, readable to you all. I'm new to this whole dev log thing, so if you read it all the way through, let me know! It'd be cool!

I'd like to use this portion to pretty much just advertise Unique Indie RPG's.

Have you ever seen that strange purple square at the beginning of the 2nd and 3rd HYPERSOMNIA trailers?

Yeah, that! That's UNIQUE INDIE RPG's, which is a Discord community for you guessed it, Unique Indie RPG videogames developed by people like me! Or you! Or whoever! Who cares!

I help run it with some of my friends, and we all share cool stuff about our videogames! There's a ton of other SUPER cool RPG Maker games there like Astral Guard [LINK], or SOMEWHEN [LINK], or even MOMOinc [LINK]!

And of course, HYPERSOMNIA. It's a really laid back community, we're all super chill. Come swing by! We'd love to have ya, and SHOW US YOUR GAME!

[LINK TO DISCORD SERVER]

TWITTER

YOUTUBE

STEAM

UNIQUE INDIE RPG'S [SHOW US YOUR GAME!]

[PREV] [ABOUT HYPERSOMNIA] [NEXT]

#hypersomniagame #rpgmaker #indie dev #updates #dev log #rpg #indiedev #earthbound #unique indie rpgs

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diezmil10000 · 11 months ago

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2023 art summary + thoughts on my own art progress under the cut!!

(template by HedgeCatDragonix on deviantart)

so i've been doing this for 10 years :P

i'm not posting these pics in high quality, they're somewhere on the internet if you want to scavange for a bit. i didn't start taking art seriously until late 2015 and i honestly don't like looking back at old drawings. i still like my 2022 art summary but it wasn't until this year that i'm proud of all my finished artworks.

my art journey is complicated. i'm not one of those artists who can say they've been drawing for all their lifes. i used to trace pokémon in my school agendas but that was it. around 2013, a couple of friends invited me to their Skype server where we used to draw each other's ocs and make art memes and stuff - it was fun and cringe in the most positive way i can say it :] i didn't know shit about art and i took pride in drawing on MS Paint with a mouse just because it was hard.

(all of my drawings until may 2018 were made with a mouse)

when i was 15 yo i got into Love Live! and i decided to get better at art because i didn't want lesbian fanart to be made only by creepy cishet men. at some point i watched this video from Sycra and it rewired my brain. i understood that i needed to actually practise and understand what i was doing, and that i wasn't going to improve just by observing. its follow-up video also helped me a lot, i remember watching it on the day it was posted jskhfdjdfd.

and so fast forward until 2021 approx. i spent all of those years practising drawing in my traditional sketchbooks, so my improvement was steady. the only problem, and in retrospective i see it as a Big Problem, is that i was grinding mindlessly. by that i mean that i copied artists i liked and i drew again and again stuff i was bad at, but i didn't think too deeply about it or analysed my own art to look for faster ways to improve it. i also don't take feedback well so i didn't ask for it either, which further slowed down my progress.

on top of it, that just made me better at drawing, not at illustration. i firmly believe that a good drawing is hard to ruin but i could have made my illustrations way more interesting if i had started going wild with colors and effects way earlier. i don't exactly regret my choices because at the end of the day it's just my hobby, and i've been praised for drawing a lot and for challenging myself to practise drawing traditionally, so i want this to be read as introspection rather than complaints!!

the reason why 2021 was a big change in my art is because in november i did this monstrosity:

i got an Android tablet to be able to draw in class and took the challenge alongside my friend Nico, who also did their own Huevember. hola si estás leyendo esto Nico, aunque lo dudo :) i can't say that any of the drawings made me better at anatomy, or composition, or colors. i can't say that they solidified my knowledge, either. but they planted a seed in my brain that would fully bloom in late 2022, which is the seed of hating the finished result of some pieces so much that i forced myself to improve.

everyone has their own motivation to get better at art and i've always thought that mine was a healthy one (i want to draw more lesbians, that's all). however, i've had a very solid 2023 and now i don't cringe at any of my pieces, plus i can notice any mistakes they have without wanting to delete them from existence - and i could only get there because at the end of 2022 i told myself i wouldn't make any more ugly illustrations. like, period. i didn't want to get anxious every time i had to look back on my own art.

i also learned that no ammount of compliments from others would magically make me like a piece i see as mid at best. of course, i appreciate every single nice comment i get (genuinely, i get very happy knowing that other people love my work), but gratitude doesn't fix a skill issue.

so, late 2022, many things happened. first i got cancelled on twitter over a drawing of my beloved mizuki from project sekai (this info will be relevant later). then i spent a whole month doing this other monstrosity that is to this day the best thing i've ever done. i haven't peaked it (yet):

this comic actually made me improve and solidify my skills. it wasn't a class assignment, or a collaboration, or anything more than a headcanon i shared with a friend - it was pure brainrot over Revue Starlight and it made me put all my cunt into it. this was also the point at which i started filling in blacks with the bucket tool instead of picking a very dark color, which is a big part of my current style :3

the thing about people cancelling me is that i had to distance myself from fandoms and eventually change accunts, which also affected how i perceived my own art. even if i draw for myself, at the end of the day i still draw characters that are loved by many people, so i disabled comments and stopped interacting with other artists of my fandom circles. that led me to go on hiatus at the start of 2023, knowing that it was time for a fresh start (my art accounts were 5 years old anyway).

that period of time made me think a lot about my finished pieces. since i wouldn't post them until i had a new account, i would stare at them for longer than ever or make small changes even if days had already passed. letting my mind rest from illustrations i had been working on and knowing i could change them whenever i wanted was a big step forward.

i realised that for the past years i had been in a hurry to post my drawings as soon as i was done with them instead of appreciating them. that was a turning point for my mindset. this was also past the time i decided to stop making ugly art, but i hadn't really taken any measures to get better. so i changed the wording of the challenge: i can make ugly art but i can't post it if i don't like it.

it doesn't sound epic, but for some reason it worked. every time i was in the middle of making a drawing that looked kind of ugly, i changed it until it looked right. not perfect, but good enough to avoid cringing in the future. some times i had to redraw it from scratch with a more interesting pose. some times i needed to add a background or a graphic element to make the characters pop. and somewhere on that period, i went wild with colors and effects, and a lot of times that saved a piece that would otherwise be boring.

i have to thank Revolutionary Girl Utena and Revue Starlight for making me experiment a lot during my hiatus. both pieces of media, one being the daugher of the other, give artists so many visual metaphors and interesting topics to work with. the revstar brainrot had been there since the junnana comic, but rgu was something i had been meaning to rewatch for a couple of years and it hit me like a fucking train. it also made me create one of the comics i'm the most proud about:

then i got into homestuck and my art got. well. stuck!! >D< but it was okay because i wasn't making ugly drawings anymore. i was putting into practise a lot of things i had been learning or experimenting with, especially regarding colors and character interactions. and the yuri was delicious hmmmmmmm.

the rest of 2023 was very linear in terms of art but not so much in terms of fandoms (?). which is fine, honestly, but i was also glad to get back into Fire Emblem: Three Houses in late that year because when i first got into it in 2019 i didn't have the skill to draw everything i wanted to draw. and i still haven't drawn all the yuri scenarios that i've been cooking in my mind, but i have until forever to do it!!

so for 2024 i want to study some stuff i feel i'm still lacking in. i think i've always had a good eye for composition, but i've never actually pushed it in my finished illustrations - they depend a lot on the poses because i've always been prioritising drawing over everything else. that needs to change this year.

i also want to get better at drawing characters from extreme angles. i've always felt like my poses are a bit flat and i think i can study photos taken with wide angle lenses to improve at that.

and of course i still want to draw faster, which is something i've always struggled with. i think i have a good rhythm of "producing" art (excuse me for the poor wording), but i'm still too slow for the kind of artstyle i want to achieve, which includes having a looser lineart and less details in irrelevant areas of the drawings. i think that overdoing the lineart actually hurts my illustrations, because everything ends up pulling the viewer's attention with the same energy. i also think messy artstyles are neat.

i promise i'm not crazy and i don't hate what i do. in fact, it's precisely because this year i managed to make some pieces with that kind of feel that i know where i want to aim. special mention to the junnana comic because i haven't been able to replicate that lineart ever since.

examples:

as for the stuff i like about my current artstyle, i definitely want to keep the way i color!! and by that i mean the method i have for applying filters that make my colors pop. i could maybe play more with textures too.

i also like the way i depict intimacy, and people have praised it too. thank you for noticing. it's the yearning that's doing it, not me. but i don't think i'll ever change the content (?) of my art, i eat breathe and speak in yuri. if anything, there are still some ways of conveying feelings that i haven't been able to draw because i lack the skill to do so, but i'll keep trying ;)

i honestly didn't expect this post to be this long. i've been writing for hours now and i'm not sure my thoughts are coherent for anyone that isn't me. i also can't grasp the idea that some people know me from fanart i did in 2016 while others started following me last month, time is wild and it's an extra dimension of complexity that i don't know how to account for when i write stuff like this.

but again, as i do with art, i've written this for myself. it's been nice to put my thoughts in order. i think i've only talked about art in depth with like 5 people and it's always been in casual conversation. no creo que estéis leyendo pero Nahia y Henar os amo y he aprendido mucho de vosotras.

thank you for reading until the end if you have. i hope you have not only a nice day but a nice year. let's meet again in the future.

#diez's art thoughts

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askfukase-flower-andfriends · 3 months ago

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// more simple human vers of the sillies (it’s only Fukase because APPARENTLY. I HVNT DRAWN FLOWER PROPERLY SINCE DECEMBER 2021.)

The second one is a little outdated, but it does show his outfit more. I never actually finished t which is why he doesn’t have the X pocket and crinkles on the damaged side. Also he has a half mask to cover his face that’s damaged, but I don’t care to draw it that much anymore.

Also they point next to him is not his point, it’s like point but it’s a variant of the species (which honestly still don’t have a name but I’ll call them mallows for now)

This is actually the only time I drew flower seriously as a human, which was back in *checking notes* NOVEMBER 2021??? Obviously outdated, but I honestly don’t think she’s changed that much. I mean honestly I need to do something for the both of them because I stopped doing human art months ago now so it’s been a bit since I’ve drawn them both ::7

Also her choker is based off a choker I actually have so I could always pull it out for pictures sake

And then of course this piece which is definitely the newest and most accurate. Sadly some of the details are kinda hard to see due to the style I went in and because I screenshotted these off my insta and anything with the slightest detail gets blurry and smudged because of instas dogshit quality

#vocaloid #art #ask blog #vocaloid ask blog #birdofthemarket #fukase #vocaloid fukase #ooc #ooc post #humans #botm information #botm

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strawberrycartt · 1 year ago

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how are you SO GOOD at art OMG

[ik the actual answer is talent and practice, i just wanted to send you love for your art and i couldn't think of a cool way to word it lol]

also i'm OBSESSED with the Halloween 2021 costume you drew for your MC especially with it matching Mams, i adore them sm

you are so cool and i admire your art and ideas a lot. you're one of those tumblr artists that inspire me to try to draw again :] maybe someday i can finish my MC and draw them with all my fav MCs like you artists do :]

i hope this doesn't sound lame, just wanted to send some good vibes to another artist whose work i really admire~ cheers

I'm so glad to hear that 😭 drawing is painful sometimes but for the most part it's been great and I'm so glad OM made me pick it back up too. You should definitely go for it and draw your MC!! With all your fave characters and friends!! That's free serotonin right there I swear!!

And yeah the halloween post is the only one from 2021 I'm still proud of that was one of those random good art moments where you end up thinking 'shit there's no way the next drawing is going to be as good as this one' LMAO. Might bring that concept back this year who knows who knows for now I only have a doodle

Currently stuck with artblock agxh so thank you for the sweet words and good vibes I needed those 🫂

#ask #replies #obey me madi #obey me mc #my art

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bosskie · 6 months ago

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3 Years of Molluck: Art 'n' the Journey

Man, it's time to 'celebrate' me drawing this Gluk for 3 years since I have barely drawn anything else than him since then... So, this is gonna be a huge post where I have bundled the most of my Molluck stuff (2021-2024) and tell ya about my Molluck (art) journey.

I started sharing my Molluck content first on Twitter but then, I moved to here since this was more fitting home for my 'Molluck love headquarters'. I have pretty much abandoned every social media but Tumblr. Right now, it just feels like I have found the right place to be but also myself. I mean, it feels like I have finally found out what actually interests me and what feels like me, so Oddworld made me find home.

I have known Oddworld for... Well, at least known about its existence for a decade or something, seen gameplay of AO and AE for multiple times, but I actually got into it only in Janurary (?) 2021 when, for some odd reason, I wanted to watch all those cutscenes from AO, AE and MO. Those cutscenes made me fall in love with Oddworld! Even I'm quite a new fan still, it's my favourite game series! It just hit me... I just love the dark humour, that darkness in general, the brutality but also that silly humour (yes, I laugh at farts)! I can understand why Lorne never really liked the fart tho' but man, I cannot let it be... I really need to draw my silly comic idea of Molluck farting... Got some proper comic paper for it; just perfect waste of paper! (Never used that paper, even it's like over a decade old pad...)

But yeah, for this reason, I got no nostalgia for the series but I got into it 'just in time', before the release of SoulStorm on the same year. So, I had time to play the previous games before playing SS, though I have never finished Stranger's Wrath... Must be the lack of Glukkons... But I'll try to continue it one day! So, from the ones I have finished, my top3 is: Abe's Exoddus, Abe's Oddysee, and SoulStorm. I have finished them all at least 3 times.

Since the beginning, Gluks and Sligs have been my favourite Oddworld species, but yes, Glukkons are my beloveds! First, I actually drew just my own Glukkons, probably because I didn't really have any favourite Gluk first, just loved them in general, but Molluck was the first 'official' Gluk I ever drew since I had started to love him. It happened after watching all those SoulStorm cutscenes; I started to see myself in him and only after that he got my attention, noticed his special appearance too. So, it wasn't love at the first sight but after I got into him, saw his personality; I just felt like he is me as a Glukkon. Man, he has felt like the love of my life and still does!

But my first ever Oddworld piece was this Abe:

Yeah, just some random Abe I felt like drawing since I got quite into Oddworld stuff! But yes, getting into Oddworld was also like starting from a new table for me since I wanted to abandon my old stuff for multiple reasons. I just wish to let that past be and focus on the present. Like I said, it just feels like I have finally found home, thanks to Oddworld! I have heard so often that I'm 'odd', so I indeed belong to there! Molluck has just made me finally comfortable with who I am and helped me to find myself. No one else has felt so right as him. Therefore I believe that I'll have lots of years with Molluck in the future!

But yes, it's time for Molluck art! I drew my first Molluck exactly 3 years ago:

I swear, I didn't draw this badly back then... You know when you just have some kind of 'skill drops' when your skills just get worse for some reason. I just had no idea how to draw him, so I ended up drawing quite horrible Molluck stuff first... But after a few months, I already started to get a lot better at drawing him. My way to draw Molluck was quite experiemental for a long time and kinda still is... I still have no idea what my style is but some randomly stylized realism... I have never even liked my own style to draw, no matter if the others liked it. Maybe it's just like food: it's better when someone else does it!

I didn't repost all my Molluck art here, just with some criteria since I have drawn Molluck so much... You can also already find on my blog almost every Molluck I have drawn, so nothing new here really but maybe two lil things. I bet that next time, when I do a post like this, I'll only post my top favourites since yeah, I do draw Molluck a lot... Cannot still draw him too much!

So yeah, welcome to my life Molluck art journey:

2021

2022

2023

[Less stuff due to worse mental health and exhaustion.]

2024

Yeah, this was like my Molluck art journey in a nutshell! I feel like redrawing some of these, at least as sketches, not really because the original looked bad but because I just love the idea I drew! There are also some WIPs I still wish to work on and finish... But maybe after I feel like doing digital paintings again. I'm just kinda tired of drawing with the mouse... Yes, all my digital stuff is done with a computer mouse; it's actually restricting me but don't feel like investing in digital art supplies, at least right now... I haven't even liked using a drawing tablet nor a touch screen, so it's what makes me hesitate... I also just enjoy doing traditional art stuff in general. The main reason why I did mainly digital stuff before was my self-hatred because I thought that I just draw some trash and therefore would waste the art supplies... Yeah, it wasn't about preference, just mental health issues... Though digital art has its advantages I miss while doing traditional stuff... So, I do still like doing digital stuff for those reasons.

Heck, what a difference:

Frankly, I feel like this year, I have finally managed to start drawing Molluck like I have wished to be able to or at least close to that since I still feel like I have a lot to learn... I more like feel like I have gotten my older skills back than actually gotten better... I mean, I haven't really improved that much. Even I have pretty much zero desire to post my old stuff, I wanna give you an example of what I mean:

This is actually a WIP still but I did it 6 years ago. Never really done any proper car drawing/painting before but I like old cars, so had to paint one! Yeah, I actually wish to draw more vehicles... I don't wonder why I actually enjoyed drawing Molluck's blimp. Gotta draw a proper 'GlukMobile' for Molluck, I guess!

I'm not here to boast, just sharing my journey, and that it can happen that one's skills kinda get worse for some reason but it doesn't mean that they are gone. I more like wish to inspire people! Like, frankly, there's one specific (SoulStorm) Molluck fan art I saw like 3 years ago, posted by OWI, that really made me wanna push harder to improve my Molluck art. I really wanted to draw Molluck like that person, it was so amazing, and still is! Just gotta give some credit to that piece, at last; it's been such a big inspiration for me! Though, I still cannot see Molluck's sinister spirit there, like OWI describes the piece... I must function somehow differently since I have never really found Molluck intimidating, no matter which Molluck it is... Oh, and I don't really wish OWI to share my Molluck stuff... I don't feel like it's good enough for such, yet... I don't really enjoy (too much) attention either. Those are also reasons why I didn't send anything to their fan art celebration thing they held recently. I'm still kinda curious to know what they would think about my doings... It was like a miracle I even felt like taking a part in that SoulStorm tattoo competition since I don't enjoy competitions, just wanna do my stuff in peace.

I still don't know how 'perfect' my way to draw Molluck is, but like I have said, I'm finally starting to feel like I draw him somewhat like I have wanted since I started drawing him. I just feel like I could still draw him better, and better... But thru telling you this, I only wish to encourage you! There has been people who have said that they wish to have my skills/talent and I have been in that same position with my Molluck stuff, wishing being able to draw like someone else. It only made me push harder, though yes, it has also made me feel like my stuff looks like crap, but I don't wish it to look like that, so gotta just keep drawing! Art is pain, got even a deep scar from making it, but I do still love creating stuff; enjoying my own results is a different story though... Like, I seriously thought that my entry to that SoulStorm tattoo competition (that realistic piece of Molluck and his Slig from 2022) looks bad and almost deleted it after submitting it, but I won... I still don't know how to really handle it...

But honestly, I never thought that someone would ever look at my stuff and think that they wish to have my talent... It's such a big compliment... I feel speechless when I think about it, especially when I'm a someone who has literally taken all his own stuff away multiple times because he has hated his own creations, saw them as mere trash... One side of me is still saying that 'What talent? Please, wish to have someone better's talent...' or 'Oh, you want it? I can give it since I'm only wasting it!' since I don't personally feel talented (and I suffer from self-hatred), even I have heard so long that I'm a multi-talent, been even called a genius... I don't know what's the reality with this... Welp, I just wanna focus on creating my Molluck crap stuff in the best way possible! I still got so much Molluck stuff to do... But I still hope that I could see the talent the others see me having... Maybe it's just too close to me, literally being me, so I just cannot see it... Or maybe I can see it but wanna deny it... I really don't know what to think of my stuff; sometimes I only see it as just some trash, feel throwing them away, and sometimes I'm even able to like my stuff but that I loved my art... Nope, just cannot say it, mostly because I don't love myself either, but I'm trying my best to learn it. I only love my subject, Molluck.

I'm sorry but I just can be honest about how I feel about my stuff... I do not wanna create any idealized picture. Also, I have suffered from self-hatred for over a decade, so I'm sick 'n' tired of it... It just makes we wanna be brutally honest. I know how it can affect people but I just cannot hide my actual feelings, I'm so exhausted... Molluck also just relates so much to my mental health, like he is keeping me together... Man, I don't know in what kind of dark 'n' deep pit I would be right now without him... That Gluk just means so much to me... I don't really wish to post my self-insert stuff because it's my personal stuff but here's one old WIP I could show, especially when I really wish I could hug Molluck right now...

Yes, there was a version of this without me earlier and it's not the only self-insert thing I posted without myself. Some of them are also cropped NSFW stuff... Sometimes, it kinda feels sad when I succeed to draw Molluck well but then, it's something I don't wish to show... Yeah, could have more stuff to show but eh, I keeping them to myself, at least for now. I already confessed that the only Molluck animations, in 2D 'n' in 3D, I have done are NSFW... I wish to do ones I can actually post...

But yes, I'm sorry but I'm not the one 'contribuiting' the rule 34, even I do create NSFW stuff about Molluck, like I have said... But I could make his 'OnlyChumps' account, like I have seen some people joking about, but it would cost an arm and leg; Molluck ain't cheap! Just joking but, yeah it's just my own self-insert stuff and it would be odd to let people kinda come to 'our bedroom'... Also yeah, I know that Molluck is asexual for a natural reason but maybe he could still enjoy it since for me, it is about sharing and giving love. I just wish to give love to his beautiful body! Frankly, I feel like I'm kinda in a minority when it comes to loving his body like it is... Like I have said earlier, haven't seen anyone like me with this, especially when it comes the way I 'want' him... I have just mainly seen people laughing at his body... Welp, maybe I just got odd taste but he is literally the most beautiful creature I know and drives me crazy... Just no one else has made me feel like this... There was always a feeling like something isn't right but not with Molluck. I only just feel so good with him! Oh, and I'm not talking about real living people here, never had such a relationship.

Oh, and yeah, I have forgotten to say that when I think about my self-insert relationship with Molluck, I feel equal with him, even though yes, he got the moolah, owns the stuff ect... But we could own the stuff together too. The thing is just that there is no boss in our relationship; there are compromises. I just feel true love toward him. I tend to think that he kinda loses his 'boss-self' with me, meaning that he can be vulnerable, show his soft side, and feel free with me. Though yes, he does still have his dominant side but at the same time, he can be submissive and vulnerable, so this is complicated to explain... But yeah, the thing is that we both prefer to be dominant, so it creates a certain dynamic to our relationship. I have also just read that some people who are in a dominant positition, like a leader, like to swap the role in private, so it has inspired me. There is still no need to really explain this stuff but just saying that I have built a complex and deep relationship with Molluck.

It took me some time to build this relationship with Molluck and figure out how I prefer/like him to be, in many ways. But I have always just seen that there's a sweet side of him, even it's barely visible, but he just feels friendly... I don't know if it's just me being like the opposite, again, but he just doesn't give me that 'sinister vibe' I often hear people saying... So yeah, my way to see him is kinda soft but just because he did make me have this image. I have tried to find all the information about Molluck but there ain't much still, so I have done my own part to fill the gaps and try to make this all make sense. I also do feel like he is actually softer now since he is different in New 'n' Tasty than he was in Abe's Oddysee; he doesn't even laugh with the other Gluks anymore when he revealed his Mudokon Pops plan! He just seemed to be happy about that the other Gluks liked his plan. I just bet that it was actually like his last hope to save his business since he did invent the other products first, like his own cigar brand and that Molluck's MouthLube... But I just bet that he did his best but his fate was unfortunate... His Mudokon Pops plan might have been like his last hope, him being desperate. I just love this Gluk so much that I feel genuinely sad for him... I don't wanna pity him and I bet that he doesn't want it either but he just has my sympathy and I don't wish him to get killed... I still laugh at that AO's good ending like every time I see it since I just love that Abe's disgust and shock when he sees naked Molluck! It's really the funniest Oddworld cutscene for me, even at the same time I feel bad for Molluck...

This cutscene is the best reason to play the good ending in AO. (Y) Man, we don't even see Molluck's suit burn in NnT! I mean, it's really a worse version of this, Abe doesn't even sound disgusted there... I have also said this earlier but in NnT, Molluck's voice is awful... Just way too much pitch shift... AO one had more personality there too, and SS Molluck feels more like that AO Molluck still. I love the both Mollucks! Oh, and I would also say that I'm glad that they added a bit pitch shift to SS Molluck's final voice... I heard the trailer one later on and man, it just made me laugh! Though, when he breathes, that pitch shift sounds too artificial... When I have done my Molluck dubs, I also add a bit pitch shift to make it sound more accurate since it's a part of his voice in SS. It's just funny to me that I can imitate him quite accurately... But it's useful too since I can 'make' him say whatever I want for whatever I wanna do! I can say that I use it like every day to entertain myself... Mostly just saying silly things or quoting him...

When I create my Molluck content, I do wish to respect him, handle him with care, even I can also kinda make fun of him... I see that his personality has different shades, like that he can be an angry, bossy jerk but also such a sweet Gluk. He still cannot do much with his body but he is able to give affection, love, and pleasure, even if in a limited way. Yeah, since I did say it out loud back then, him being 'the receiver' only makes sense to me too... I mean, his body ain't really meant for physical acts... But maybe it's just my own preference and the way I see him... I love his body like it is, even it kinda happens that I make him somehow a bit more muscular... It's not my intention but well, I bet that it's not a bad thing. He does still have his arms and... Well, his mouth... Just saying that he is able to do some physical stuff with them!

This already a long ass post but since I mentioned some stuff, I feel like saying that I know some fan stories about humans being in Oddworld and I know that some people don't like humans being therem, so it's a controversial topic. But my reason to imagine myself being in Oddworld is just that I wish to be with Molluck, looking like I do IRL. I have invented my own story like how we ended up together but it's kinda still in development, especially when I just cannot really think of a single reason why anyone would start to love me or get interested in me and so on... Like, I just recently started to feel alright with that if I was an artist in Oddworld and Molluck was one of my customers and something just 'clicked' between us, but he would have also really loved the way I drew/painted/sculpted him, wishing me to be his personal artist. I had another story earlier, mostly because I just couldn't imagine myself doing art in Oddworld due to my self-hatred... That ad I drew recently just inspired me to think about this new version of the story. This version would just make much more sense but I don't really care about thinking of how I ended up in Oddworld in the first place, it's not really important. I only care about my time with Molluck!

Oh, and yes, I don't mind being his 'partner in crime' either! Love is... well, blind since I just feel like I love this Gluk, no matter what he has done. It doesn't give me anything special 'kicks', more like just see that his personality has different sides, and he is a part of the Magog Cartel, so he kinda must act that way. He has grown in that environment, got the Gluk narrative of the things, thinks that he is doing the right things. I understand him and wish to be kind to him since I just feel like there somewhere he is actually a sweet Gluk. I don't know how alone I'm with this but SoulStorm Molluck just gives me 'friendly vibes'... I bet that the fact I see myself in him affects a lot the way I see him. It's just that I associate myself the most with the Gluks... I would be a Glukkon if I was an Oddworld character! (I should redesign my Gluk-sona...) Well, Lorne also associates himself with the Gluks the most, so, heh, I'm not alone with this. Dunno if it's a good thing but Gluks have just won my heart, despite of all the crap they do... Maybe they are just way too adorable to me... Glukkons literally made me be into octopuses too! Oh, and related to this I haven't actually ever really had Molluck as my wallpaper/background... Dunno if it's a surprise but just felt like using the default stuff or octopuses... Though, I found from the files of Steam version of Abe's Oddysee some desktop icons, like the best possible trash can icon, being RuptureFarms meat barrel! Just had to use it after I discovered it by accident. So, if you got that, check out the game files! There's quite interesting sound effects too... Yeah, good stuff! (Fun fact: I got 7 copies of AO... 4 physical and 3 digital. Maybe it's my fave after all, not sure honestly... Maybe it's just my love for Molluck...)

Man, it's time to end this post... I still feel like I have only gotten started with my Molluck stuff. There is still so much to create, so many styles to explore, just so much to do! I don't even really feel like I have a certain style... It feels like I always draw somehow differently... Like, just look how varied my Molluck stuff looks! Welp, life is too short to use only one style! Just joking, I just wish to see Molluck in different styles and put him in different situations! I'm actually quite used to draw with different styles... I personally feel like I got nothing that makes people think that 'Oh, it's drawn by Bosskie/Riki!' if there was no signature nor maybe even Molluck...

I have no idea what kind of style I wish to exactly have, I just draw something in a way I feel like drawing it. I mainly do realism because it's something 'easy'... Just draw what you see and that's it. Though, I do enjoy different drawing styles, like photorealism but also cartoony style, so why only choose one? But like I have said earlier, I have never liked my cartoony style, even the others have... Though, I also like to mix different styles together, so yeah, my way to do art is kinda a mess... Don't really know what I'm doing... But that I'm trying to picture Molluck! But one style I have wished to achieve for years is to draw in a photorealistic way but like it has a filter on it, so stylized realism or something. Can't help that the style I admire the most do is realism...

I cannot really say what I think of my own art but that I feel like I don't really draw well... Just have so much to improve here and there but at least now I do draw actively, after a long time! It's just that whenever I look at how the others draw, I tend to feel I draw worse stuff... But it only makes me push myself harder, maybe even too hard, to improve my stuff, though sometimes, I also feel like I should stop doing art since my stuff just sucks... Well, I only wish to create more Molluck content, no matter how crappy it was. It's just the truth that I tend to feel depressed when I look at my stuff... I often find it that bad... They are rare moments when I can actually say I liked something I drew. This is pretty muchly the reason why I'm also drawing Molluck so much: I'm not often pleased with the result but I just love drawing Molluck. I'm sorry but I could mop the floors with my self-esteem, it's just quite low... Still trying to build it and stay positive, even I can easily think quite harsh things about myself...

Whoa, if you made this far, I really wanna thank you for your time! I hope that my stuff is enjoyable, despite of my mental health issues!

~ Much love to ya! 💛

#molluck #oddworld molluck #molluck the glukkon #oddworld #art like a bosskie

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explorersaremadeofhope · 11 months ago

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I would like to know more about both your Star Trek Terror fic and your Crozier hates tinder fic please 🙏

omg okay so like, these are both a bit old, star trek terror fic is proper old, i think i wrote it in 2021, but im still hoping!! i had so much fun just working out the worldbuilding on that one and how the different characters slot into different roles, but then i ran up against my old nemesis The Actual Plot and was like 'hmm ok, i think i need to know a bit more about Star Trek TOS lore for this', aaaand that's where i stalled. it's fitzier, but like, eventually. very eventually. you'll see why from the snippet 😂

crozier hates tinder fic was me going 'why is there almost no modern au romcom rossier fic' and then having a very funny convo with some folks on discord about science nerds on tinder. that one mostly exists in vague outline form with a scene or two written out plus random details like 'james ross owns not one but several tacky early 2000s mugs from various places in the southern hemisphere, preferably with penguins on'.

snippets mostly below a cut because they got long (sorry about that)!

Star Trek Terror:

francis raised his brows, but said nothing. ignoring fitzjames' confused expression, he turned his attention back to the file in his hand. "i see from your service record that you've received several commendations for bravery in engagements with the romulans and the klingons." he looked up. "out of curiosity, do you speak klingon? or romulan?"

"ah, no, sir," fitzjames smiled apologetically. "i'm afraid i don't."

"i see. so your expertise lies primarily in firing at alien races, not communicating with them."

it wasn't a fair question, nor a fair conclusion. clearly taken aback, fitzjames blinked in open surprise. "sir," he began carefully, "i believe my qualifications -"

"your qualifications, commander fitzjames, are perfectly adequate. even impressive. for war." francis fixed him straight in the eye and held his gaze. "but don't let the repurposed nature of our ship fool you. we are a survey vessel. you will appreciate, no doubt, that the primary goal of any exploratory mission is to avoid bloodshed, not to excel at it." fitzjames drew breath to speak. francis ignored it. "put bluntly, commander, we don't particularly need a war hero. what we need is someone who knows how to calibrate a spectrometer correctly."

"with all due respect, sir," said fitzjames, once he was sure francis had finished speaking, "i think you'll find i have the requisite scientific training to apply for this post." he'd uncrossed his legs while francis was speaking and now sat ramrod straight. his mouth was pinched, his dark brows drawn together.

francis waved that away with a flick of his hand and a shake of his head. "this isn't a twelve-month patrol tour along the neutral zone, commander. we will be five years in deep space. sometimes uncharted space. in that situation, a man's merits on paper will matter far less than his personal qualities."

there was a pause in which fitzjames lowered his gaze to the floor, his jaw working. when he spoke again it was to a point just above francis' shoulder. the affable buoyancy had drained from his voice, leaving a gravel harshness which francis privately suspected was far more genuine. "i respectfully posit, sir," said fitzjames, "that you don't know my personal qualities, seeing as we've only just met."

francis' smile did not reach his eyes. "be that as it may. i'm afraid my decision is made, commander." he set his padd aside and folded his hands on the table. "thank you for your interest. and good morning."

Tinder fic:

“Well,” says Blanky flatly. “That's sexy.”

But as he reads over the message one more time, Francis’ heart is actually slowing down from its panicked gallop – his dread replaced with sheer relief at being given a topic of conversation he's fluent in.

“No, no, it's fine,” he says absently, staring at the words I'm thrilled we matched. “I don't mind.”

“Aye, you wouldn't, would you. What the hell are–” Thomas peers at the screen more closely. “Pinnipeds?”

“Seals. Well. Not just seals.” Francis looks up. “It's one of those things – all seals are pinnipeds but not all pinnipeds are seals. You know?”

Blanky regards him with the look of a man who absolutely does not. "Right."

After staring at his phone for a few moments longer, Francis opens the keyboard.

Hi, he types out with deliberation. Thank you for – no. That comes off a bit pathetic, doesn’t it. Backspace.

Thank you; likewise. Exclamation point? Does the full stop look dour? Cold? But he’s never been much of an exclamation point man. Likewise – I’ve always wanted to visit Antarctica. What

He stops typing, seized by a sudden fear. Hurriedly erasing the message draft, he looks up at Blanky. “Can people see me typing on this thing?”

“Fuck should I know, Francis? I’ve been married for twenty years. – Give us a minute, though.” Blanky pulls out his own phone and writes a text. Less than a minute later, his phone pings. “Hannah says aye. Also wants to know if I'm cheating on Esther.”

#*#asks #wip game #thank you for asking!!💖

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genericpuff · 2 years ago

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i thought it was the doctor foxglove show? or did she have another comic?

The Doctor Pepper Show was the one she ran back in the early 2000's, you can even find it on The Webcomic List titled as such.

The Doctor Foxglove Show seemed to be some kind of spin-off series that she only drew a couple chapters for. It was talked about in an article online (alongside The Maiden which was a one shot project she did; heads up, there is nudity) and the description seems quite different from The Doctor Pepper Show.

The Doctor Pepper Show is described as: "This is a comic set in a world where evil doctors rule, girls wear frilly underpants and people use their manners. *May I please blow your f**king head off?* This comic features Gothic dandys, EGL (Gothic lolitas) and medical fetish fashion. (Neo victorian setting)"

Whereas The Doctor Foxglove Show is described as: "A surreal thriller that follows a young woman and her struggles adjusting to her place between life and death."

In that article I was actually able to find the old Webtoon Canvas link for The Doctor Foxglove Show, but it seems to have been removed now.

Fortunately we live in a world where the Wayback Machine exists!

The most recent crawled screenshot above ^^^ was from 2021 but it's gone now in 2023 so she must have removed it from Webtoons within the last couple years. You can see she made it to Chapter 2 before she stopped working on it, this was before or around the time Lore Olympus started being made on Tumblr. Considering it references The Doctor Pepper Show in the comic's own description, I think it's safe to assume it's some sort of spin-off or part of a series. Neither comic finished, though - The Doctor Pepper Show seemed to have dropped right as she was going to college.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus

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hexfloog · 2 years ago

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2021 - 2022 - 2023

Here's my art summary for 2022! In 2021 I had hoped that the inspo kick would last well into the new year, and... here we are. I produced WAY more this year than I initially thought and actually ran into the strange dilemma of having too much to choose from for this template :0

What a year for art.

I think because of the slow speed at which I produce-- and the relative stylistic consistency of what I do make-- I tend to fall into this trap of thinking I'm not actually going anywhere with my work, but looking back at my portfolio... this really isn't the case.

To put it bluntly, I see improvement from last year to now in the form of risks.

I hit a lot of milestones and firsts since January: I drew another comic, dabbled in several projects in grayscale, drew plenty of complicated backgrounds (or "whole pieces," I suppose), put together at least one .gif sequence, made mockups for merch, made real merch, zine entries... And even beyond 2D work, I wired up my first custom model kit, experimented with new materials, archived an entire TCG set, put together another cosplay, and (maybe most significantly) started writing fic again!!

I'm genuinely surprised by my output. While this year was creatively fruitful, it was maybe one of the worst on my health-- and by extension, my funds-- all around (an ER visit, COVID, some Mystery Issue with my feet... still a mystery to this day, actually) so I am pretty stunned that I managed to tap as far as I did into my creativity overall, especially when compared to 2021, a year I also thought went surprisingly well for art. Deadlines and community events and contests all pushed me into making more than I would on my own terms, so challenging myself a little definitely paid off... who would've thought? >___<

(while shoving my 2022 body of work under the bed) On the flip side, it turns out that throwing my dignity to the wind and shamelessly indulging pushes me to create, too! How many Evil Conans can one person depict in a single year??

...On a more personal level, aside from challenging myself with external motivators I think I was only able to produce as much as I did on account of simply learning to love what I make the way I make it. The vast majority of what I drew this year falls into what I've been referring to (to myself) as "drafts." But they're not drafts as most people would think of them - they're just not fully-polished works. March/November are good examples - contrast against June/August, which are definitely "polished."

It's probably not that big of a deal to other people how I refer to my work in my own company, but this year I seem to have realized that thinking of it in this way-- dismissing the time and effort spent on any one piece as merely "unfinished"-- is actually quite harmful. I have a habit of being harsh on myself and to call these works "drafts" undermines the amount of effort I put into them, and for what? Because they're not "clean" enough for (my own, self-imposed) impossible standards? That alone implies that there's only one way a work can be for it to be good enough, when the truth is that no-one would be none the wiser if I called them "finished" instead.

That's not really to say that I would stop trying to achieve this high-effort "finished" standard since I can get the same amount of mileage for lesser effort or whatever. I don't operate that way, there's a lot of pride and self-esteem tied to my art and I subscribe pretty unconditionally to delivering something that I'm proud of. I guess the key here is that "high" standards should not be "impossible" standards.

Starting from March (probably right around the time of the first DCMK FF Server Exchange), as year the progressed I slowly started warming up to this idea that I don't have to make something perfect to "get credit" for creating it. Perfectionism is an itch I'm still learning not to scratch every time it calls for my attention. And, relating to the exchange, there's something about a gift well-received that puts my guard down, and maybe it's because I'm always bracing for the worst (some imagined rejection of effort, perhaps) that I don't really expect people to so plainly like things I don't consider "good enough" for myself.

I guess what I'm saying is it's probably not an epiphany I would have just had for myself one day. I really don't think I would have realized the inherent hurt in my system if people didn't indirectly point it out to me time and time again, whether that gushing over artwork to my face or in tags or whatever, so... for that I am very grateful T___T

On that note, it has been a rough year for me so I want to express my deep appreciation for everyone who has supported me, whether you're just an art appreciator or an internet buddy, whether you came for ponies or animal mecha or ducks or detectives, whether you've donated at any point or bought something from the shop, commissioned me, etc ;___; I appreciate you all very much and truthfully I would not be creating so much if I didn't think I had an audience who could enjoy it with me. Thanks from the bottom of my heart <3

Wishing everyone a creatively fruitful and healthy 2023!!

if you've gotten this far tysm for reading i'm very stingy about good feelings and being this saccharine about anything takes effort, capital E

#personal #summary of art #summary of art 2022 #2022 summary of art #dcmk #it's LITERALLY ALL DCMK LOL #peace and love on planet earth <3 #queue

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llitchilitchi · 1 year ago

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IT WAS THE ROMANCE IS DEAD VIDEO its so good!! i get you, id only heard vaguely of the comic "romanticising murder" before (which seemed like people generally finding reasons to hate on a comic that i thought was more lighthearted) but omg it is so much more graphic then i imagined. i read a couple random chapters after finishing the video its. way too much for me pspsksj

theres like some similarities (as soon as he was saying about the murder guy breaking the other guys legs to stop him escaping and showing panels of him crawling on the ground i thought of the copacetic au) but killing stalking seems way more graphic and dark in ways that i (personally) find uncomfottable that the au doesnt, i just thought some of the general themes were similar which was interesting

anyway sorry for rambling in your ask box psksjjs, i was just curious!

no need to be sorry at all anonnie, it's cool to see people talking about this stuff!!

when I first heard of killing stalking it was because people were shamelessly shipping the two main characters and I went into it with the full intent of 'okay, this is just a weird yaoi manhwa with some fucked up elements' so when I actually got thru the first few chapters I got whiplash of just how much the story was Not That. a lot of it stuck with me for all the wrong reasons.

it's a really heavy read and the fact that the artist shows us A Lot of it was one of the reasons I had to stop reading myself. I've noticed it since I first started posting comics online myself (back in October 2021) but describing these things verbally is a lot easier to stomach than actually seeing it depicted, especially if it's shown directly. I think it really hit me when I drew a comic where c!dream died during torture. makes it more real to see it, I suppose?

ironically enough I think that the leg thing is the one part of the story that I'm almost entirely sure was Not inspired by KS, though now that you mentioned it, it probably was to an extent. I may have mentioned it before but a lot of the stuff around copacetic!Dream's legs was inspired by a Slovak novel Ťapákovci that we had to read in high school and I've seen a theatre play of with some really fucked up takes on the disability of one of the main characters

#asks #copacetic au

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unclewarwick · 4 months ago

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introducing Yzyck Fournier and his friends, starting with this drawing i just finished today!

Cat Something is a very nervous and generally silent person. He was 'created' by Dr. Gones when she removed his brain from his original body and put it into the body he now inhabits. He does not like being near her. His memories of life before the procedure are scant; "Cat-something" was his response when asked for his name. Dr. Nibha Gones (pronounced 'Jones') is a mad scientist who likes to find the strangest and often most unethical ways to create new life. She likes to think she is the most reasonable person in her circle, but such a thing does not really exist. She is more reserved and disconnected from everyone. Yzyck Fournier (first name pronounced 'Isaac') is a Frankenstein-cum-Geppetto type who performs gender-affirming surgeries. He views Dr. Gones as his enemy, but they have also been friends for a very long time. Yzyck's friends (not including Dr. Gones) live with him in a big laboratory. He refers to many of his friends as his 'creations'.

Yaag Kralaaga is the most recent of Yzyck's creations. It's not quite dead and not quite alive. He is very clingy to Yzyck and sometimes only speaks one word at a time. It likes to meet new people, but new people do not like to meet it. Yaag can tend to have an aggressive demeanour. Accordion Doll is an animated accordion doll that Yzyck made. It does not have a name and mostly slinks around the lab aimlessly, not capable of much else. Magret is one of Yzyck's very old friends. He speaks through the gramophone horn and likes to wear a large variety of dresses. He was the subject of Yzyck's first experiment, which failed and resulted in Magret losing his head. His body was preserved for a long time until Yzyck felt he was skilled enough to bring his friend back.

there's not really a set storyline with this group, it's mostly just a way to have fun and draw whatever ridiculous ideas i get. the rest of the art in this post is from newest to oldest.

2024-07-17 -- dr. gones is invited to yzyck's place.

2024-07-15 and 2024-06-02 -- comic i struggled to colour in bc Tired, and some life advice from a man with varied and fantastical experience! both of these are the first time i properly drew a character (dr. gones, magret) while having the concept for them a very long time beforehand.

2024-04-20 -- an 'animation' using audio from conan o'brien's appearance on hot ones, with other original characters (Mick and Christian) that you can see more of in the #attic dweller tag.

2024-02-27 -- mick brought christian to be observed by yzyck, who observes more than mick hoped.

both 2023-12-28 -- a newspaper clipping and a very normal vlog.

2023-12-17 -- poster about how the ongoing pandemic is a workers' rights issue.

2023-11-12 and 2023-11-13 -- yaag in the "flirty" and "very flirty" sims 4 emotion poses as part of a not-abandoned-but-on-hold WIP where i'm trying to draw characters in each emotion pose from the game.

2023-10-23 -- one of my favourite drawings of my fellas! poses based off a photo of the monkees. it was hard to interpret whose body parts belonged to who since they were wearing matching outfits in the photo.

2023-09-04 -- mick asks if yzyck can take a look at this beast being kept in his attic. he is scared of everything. yaag is there too.

2023-07-13 -- animated gif of yzyck showing off his incredible skills. one of the first times i felt i "properly" drew him.

2023-06-22 -- ariel needs legs meme redraw with mick and yzyck.

2023-06-22 -- yzyck talks about his favourite thing to eat for breakfast.

2023-04-30 -- my first (kinda) full drawing of yaag. i am simply not good at planning out reference sheets, so i was unable to draw its head actually attached to its body..

all 2022-04-13 -- some loose early drawings of yzyck and magret.

2022-03-02 -- first drawing of yzyck - the words were a note to myself to remember the name and details of a new character i wanted to make.

2021-08-08 -- a demonstration of how the accordion doll can move. i'd forgotten to draw the pattern on the bellows.

2021-07-04 -- this all started with the accordion doll, which was a concept a friend had. at the time i drew this, i began to think about who would have created it.

#aurt #yzyck and co #gif #animation #flashing lights #long post #mad scientist

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cartooncreaturelover · 1 year ago

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Hello it's me again!

So I have some more asks, some relating to art, some just random stuff I think of XD

1. Favorite character of yours that you like drawing?

2. What's your favorite show/movie? (If you don't have a favorite, just name ones you like)

3. Oldest oc you have? How did they change throughout the time you had em?

Thanks in advance!

✨ Hi! Thank you so much for asking more questions! (You're literally the first person to send in more than one ask before! Thank you for bringing some life to my ask box, lol!)

Question 1. I don't know if I have a favorite character of mine to draw, but the first character that popped into my head was Darragh, probably since I used to draw him A LOT & know how to draw him pretty well from all the times I've drawn him before! (I'm hoping to get a light board this holiday season so I can actually finish an updated version of his reference sheet soon!)

Question 2. I like a lot of shows & movies, so I'll just list the many that I like instead!

Some Of The Movies I Like Include... Back To The Future (trilogy) Little Shop of Horrors (1986) Ferris Bueller's Day Off Gremlins Gremlins 2: The New Batch How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (2004) Wolfwalkers Shrek 2 Puss in Boots: The Last Wish The "Spider-Man: Spider-Verse" series The "Kung Fu Panda" series The "Sing" series The "Trolls" series

Some Of The TV Shows I Like Include... Bluey The Owl House Infinity Train Ducktales (2017) Gravity Falls Steven Universe My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005) Our Flag Means Death Bob's Burgers Central Park SpongeBob SquarePants (Seasons 1-3)

(You know, writing this list out has made me realize how much I like musicals... & DreamWorks Animation???)

Question 3. The oldest OC that I have is my first OC! I haven't drawn her in a long time, but her name is Magic & she initially was one of those classic "character a child likes, so they barely recolor the character & call it their own;" the actual character was Spyro from the Skylanders series! (Yes, I love "Pug Spyro!") Initially, the only difference was that she had white accent colors instead of gold/bronze. As I got better at drawing & designing characters, I began to actually make her more original & less like Skylanders' Spyro (pictured below!)

The first drawing (which is actually the first drawing I ever made of her!) is from 2014, I think in April; I believe we were going on a school field-trip that day to a trampoline park as a reward for the good students? I drew her with no reference in class with my pencil & colored pencils on a piece of notebook paper! Whenever that day was, it was the day I decided to take art seriously & was the start of my journey to getting as good at drawing as I am today!

The second drawing is (I think) from around 2018 when I really started to try & make her legally distinct from Skylanders' Spyro; different shaped horns, fin-like ears, furred belly & (not pictured) tail tip (kinda like Banjo's)! I made that drawing with my old & cheap watercolor set on what (I think) is sketchbook watercolor paper; & yes, that tiny little portrait is in a tiny little picture frame!

The third drawing is a concept doodle for a 4.0 design for Magic from around 2021 or 2022? I never finalized the design, but the idea was to really change her body type into being more chubby & pear-shaped like some stuffed animals I have, as well as adding stars to her design since I think of her as my "spark of inspiration" for where I am now! Since I've been working on redesigning another dragon-like character of mine recently, perhaps I'll finally get around to finalizing Magic 4.0, who knows!

You (or anybody else who may see this!) can totally ask me more questions about my interests or old/new characters of mine if you’d like! Thank you so much for taking the time to ask me fun questions to answer! ✨

#this is an ask!#questions #arianimates #Magic Spark #dragon #skylanders #shows #movies

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mirukimary · 2 years ago

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My Art Summary for 2022!

(Under the cut I'll go into more details for each month, for memory's sake. Warning: It's LONG.)

Come one, come all for your opportunity to see all of the drawings I should have posted but never did! The ones that make me work harder every december to remember when tf i drew what! The ones that, in missing, make it seem like i only draw once a year--! (going through my twitter media tab is depressing LMAO)

JANUARY

[Pictured: Iola in Prenda clothing. There was a Twitter Post going around asking you to draw your WoL in your country's traditional clothes. Ofc I didn't skip the opportunity to do it! And drew my BF's WoL too for good measure. Still my fav drawing of the year!]

Also worked on a VTuber model for a friend (i drew it as a bust january last year; then this year was asked to expand it to full body). It was very challenging, but also fun!

For the rest, I designed some backstory NPCs for Asera (Daimyorus childhood friend, his goddess and a mage that helped us multiple times); and drew some twitch emotes for a client. Was a fresh, fun start. I remember having a lot of fun and finding that month quite relaxing.

(Goddess Rondra, Mage Rupin & elf-friend Pedro (RIP))

FEBRUARY

[Pictured: My friend's bunny boi~]

Further work was done on the VTuber model, a lot of parts that weren't quite working before were redrawn. He was taking form!! Now that most of the work was done, also did a ref sheet to go with it. I couldn't wait to see him moving!

That's when I started preparing to open commissions for realz, trying to think of prices and set up examples. I drew some BGs and the Complexity Guide, and set most of the boring things up. I plan to open comms either Jan 2023 or February 2023, so let's hope all the work paid off~

MARCH

[Pictured: 'Smile at the Blue Skies', or "Fuq i need a bust sketch ref for my commission examples page". Sounds a bit less dreamy now, huh? LMAO]

But yeah, most of the month was dedicated to the VTuber model, working to fix it as the rigger found issues. Ref Sheet was finished this month. I'll stop mentioning the model, but the back and forth lasted till june or so?? Had to fix all of his toggles; and redraw his entire hair to allow for a better 3D effect when moving (it went from 3~6 layers to over 20). This was my first time working on vtuber models, so there was A LOT to learn. It surprising how many pitfalls there is in vtuber making. I'm very proud of how it turned out, and eternally grateful to the rigger (and to my friend) for being so patient with me. I was sent a small demo of what he looks like, and seeing your drawing move so beautifully like that feels magical!! There's still much to design and draw before he can debut, but hope you can support him then!

Oh yeah, there was this attempt too:

APRIL

[Pictured: 'With Friends' the commission I worked on through March and April. Extra special because that's my friend & his pets there!]

Also sketched some ideas for illustrations of our RP characters (hi Irene), but never really completed them:

It feels so long since I made these... Double checked like 3 times to make sure it wasn't April 2021 LMAO

I REALLY want to revisit some of these now.

MAY

[Pictured: #XIVARTBASH drawing, featuring Nero.]

Also drew the catgirl from Love2DrawManga. Didn't do much this month (...or did but forgot). I believe I worked on some BGs I can't show, but these are still very much stuck at WIP :(

JUNE

[Pictured: Nia's WoL, Mat. Just a smol gift for someone that brings a lot of joy to FFXIV Twitter.]

So... I completelly forgot I was drawing my OCs outfits [facepalm]:

(Don't mind the two in the corner, I don't want my essay to get hit with Tumblr hammer LMAO They're nowhere near done). But yeah, these are my OCs from 'Elder''. I've had them since childhood, and still love them, even if I gave up on the book idea. Will make an actual post once all is done and I can go back to their character illusts uwu

JULY

[Pictured: Cade from 'Still Shining'. Working on this was an amazing experience~ Won't go on detail bc I already did, but still glad for the experience!]

Instead I'll talk about... Art Fight month!!!

SO.MUCH.FUN

I'm 100% going back next year! This event just proved how much I love drawing people's OCs. I really want to be a commission artist so I can do that for a living. Sadly I didn't get to draw everyone I wanted, plus I wasted a lot of time trying to look through OCs while the website was dying LMAO Next year I'll come prepared!

Also I drew that Spring picture to use as a reference in her profile there. I missed drawing her!

AUGUST

[Pictured: Commission for 'Under Maintenance'.]

Mostly worked on commemorative stuff. Anniversary chibi for Brie; that Under Maintenance pic; Thank You for DL message for 'Loving You Fully' and 'Still Shining'. Also designed some outfits (and painted some sprites) for Mythic Meetup: Midnight Mystery (not released yet!).

Started a bday gift for my boyfriend, but something kept looking 'off' about it so I didn't finish in time. Turns out it was overblended... And will require a redraw. Sorry boyfriend TT But my wife (tm) needs to look perfect!!

Also made the design for our new RP characters:

(mine is the not-cat girl, obviously)

...And I belive this is when I made that cursed Yshtola feeding Zero picture? Yeah.

SEPTEMBER

[Pictured: Witch Torunn]

Made the YCH bases, as well as 3 examples. I have no memories of this month, but Windows says this sketch is from september:

OCTOBER

[Pictured: Old OC redraw, for my Commission Guide. Decided to do it after a client asked for clarification if an old drawing was halfbody or fullbody (august last year, Torunn sitting down).]

They're really old OCs of mine. Ever RP-ed in Deviantart groups? I did!!

Cecilia (<-) is pretty much a Iola prototype: salve maker and potion seller who lives with her dad (who taught her the craft). One day he collapses during work, and Cecilia ends up overworking herself to afford his medicine and other living expenses. In desperation, she joins The Guild as a novice magician for money, and gets herself involved on a war she never intended to join.

Celticca (->) is a archer and aspiring musician who wants to make the most beautiful song (tm) for her family. She's very sweet, but naïve and scatterbrained. I didn't have much planned for her, but had a lot of fun seeing her constantly get involved with Evil/Neutral alligned characters w/o noticing LOL

....Now that I think about it, she's literally a FFXIV bard, before I knew anything about XIV.

The rest of October was focused on Magni's Birthday Project and my YCH Halloween Commissions.

...And THIS:

Halloween pictures of our current RP characters \O/ To go with our halloween session~ Also drew these two for our halloween one-shot:

Ellie (<-) and Hadrianus (->). Ellie is a yandere witch I made as a joke and fell in love with. Hadrianus is my BF's wizard. Yes, he looks like Dr. Strange. Yes, that's the joke. The 3rd character was Rosemary, but I didn't ask to draw her so she's missing :( I do want to draw all of them at some point. We accidentally made "Spy x Family, but it's horror and Loid wants to run away" LOOOL I love this trio!!

Made 2 adoptables, but since they went unsold I decided to remove them and redraw for next year:

(The neutral pose doesn't help them stand out ^^;; Sorry bbys)

Also sketched Julio from Atelier Sophie~

(Hoping to finish it early next year. He's not the only idea I had while playing, but other stuff took priority"")

October was so much fun!! Sadly it let me completely drained by the end of it. I got hit with such a HUGE art block it was like my hands just... Forgot how to draw. Everything came out weird. Sadly, that resulted on me having to drop a drawing I was making for Brie :/ Hoping I can pick it back up soon... (better late than never right?)

It's around that time I decided to work on an AI redraw. Used Crayon (old Dall-e Mini) to create some monstrosity for me and tried to turn it into an actual drawing.

The monstrosity:

The Work In Porgress:

This drawing is a bit painful to look at, because of all the self doubt and bad feelings attached to it. But I want to finish it someday. My prompt was something stupid like 'cute anime girl having fun'. I want to remain true to the prompt and make her meeting with lil ladybug feel warm and fun!

...Like of the feelings I was missing back then, and am just now starting to get back.

TL;DR: Take breaks or you'll break.

NOVEMBER

[Pictured: Chibi Adra for Kyou.]

Managing burnout through most of it. Eventually just decided to stop fighting and played games instead. Even with the frame drops, Atelier Ryza is pretty fun~ Hoping to go bk to it soon.

At some point my boyfriend said I should just draw things to have fun for a bit. I followed his advice...

DECEMBER

[Pictured: Art Party (DracoLunari's WoL)]

...By drawing Iola as a sheep herder. It was much more fun than it sounds. I didn't care for polish at all, just seeing Iola in a cute outfit LMAO It's... A mess of a drawing. But it's MY mess of a drawing. I feel this thought calmed my mind a lot.

Also went for my first ever Art Party. It was fun, tho brain did get in the way after a bit, as expected ^^;;; Still want to go to these more often!! It's fun to draw & chat with others.

For random drawings, all I have is a(n embarrassing) fanart of Elf from Isekai Ojisan. I'll post eventually..... (that anime is hilarious)

For now I have a commission and a collab to take care of, and a certain Moon Goddess to draw as soon as possible~ Will be doing my best these next few days, and hope Iola can be my sheperd and guide me to the path of 'having lots of fun drawing again'.

ONWARDS TO 2023...

May my year be filled with bad drawings that I love;

And good drawings I'm proud of.

May your year give you the same

And everything else you wish for!

Thanks @/Taxkha on twitter for the Template!

#maryart #art summary 2022 #it's a wall of text #but i feel i'd regret it it any other way #happy holidays all

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