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turtleblogatlast · 1 year ago

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[ cw: risk taking behavior / circumstantial self harm kinda / ignoring of injuries / self-depreciation / slight ooc-ness but for a reason! / ]

Post invasion, Leo is fine.

More than fine! He’s better than before, even. That is, if you don’t count the slightly cracked shell and still healing bones, but those are only a problem when the weather wants them to be!

Leo really is better in the ways that matter.

He’s not as cocky, not as self-centered, and overall just more heroic in general if he does say so himself.

Raph even said he was proud of Leo!

So obviously things are going well.

But.

It’s not enough.

Leo’s better, sure, but he’s still got work to do.

So - and here’s something that will probably make his brothers faint on the spot - he needs to train.

_____

His brothers do not faint, but it’s a near thing for Raph. Mikey has to fan the snapper’s face and Donnie almost brings out the smelling salts before Raph shoots back to his feet with an excited grin.

Leo’s big brother gets teary eyed soon after and envelops him in a bear hug, saying once again how proud he is that Leo is growing up.

Leo lets himself be hugged, even hugs back as fiercely as he can, because unbeknownst to Raph, this marks the end of Leo’s childhood.

He lets himself be hugged like a kid one last time, looking through the hole in Raph’s shell all the while.

_____

Leo only trains the regular way with his brothers and occasionally April and the Caseys, but most especially Raph.

But of course that’s not enough, it was never going to be.

So he goes through the motions of the stretches, the spars, the meditation, and then he leaves.

He makes sure to have his excuses ready, usually defaulting to Hueso as his go to since his brothers are easily bought off with the promise of pizza. Leo hasn’t yet found the tracker Donnie installed in him, but when he does that’ll be dealt with too! But for now, this should be good.

See, the invasion made him realize something.

It’s not about him, but it was his shortcomings that led to everything going to hell.

So he just…needs to get rid of those shortcomings.

He’s working on it, gaining fighting skill in training, but there’s more he needs to do, more skills he needs to train.

Leo watches intently as Repo Mantis swindles someone, he memorizes the sleight of hand that Hypno performs, he sneaks back into the Mystic Library and is so quiet the hush bats forget he’s there, he talks Big Mama into honing his manipulation, and he even sneaks into human hospitals and reptile veterinary clinics to get a clue on more serious injuries.

And after any of these, he heads to Run of the Mill to compete in the Maze of Death.

_____

This is his twelfth time going through the (newly remodeled and even more deadly) Maze of Death, and would be his fifth time winning. The first three times had him waking up in Hueso’s office, and each time he wakes his old persona shines through.

He always waves off Hueso’s annoyance and questions and insists on trying again next time before he steals some pizza and bails.

The skeleton actively tries to stop him from entering the Maze after the first time, but hey- mystics are allowed before you enter.

It’s easy enough to teleport on by.

Harder to meet Hueso’s - and later his brothers’ - eyes when he fails again.

When he first actually won, Hueso congratulates him in that typical deadpan tone of his.

“Ah, felicidades, Pepino. Now you can move on, sí?”

“Hm? Nah, boneman! That run was sloppy!”

And then Leo runs off before Hueso can stop him.

He doesn’t even look at his picture on the champion wall when he next comes around. It’s not much to look at anyway.

_____

His second win is much like the first, and only his third win is actually acceptable.

But he knows the field too much now. He needs a challenge.

When he attempts to go through it blindfolded, he’s quickly shown how much he doesn’t know the Maze. So, obviously, he loses again.

He got a bit more banged up that time around.

“Pepino, basta ya, you’ve already won. Where are your brothers?”

“I can’t stop yet, señor! This is for my brothers - no les digas, please.”

Even if Hueso wanted to tell Leo’s brothers, they haven’t been in enough for him to get to, and it’s not like Hueso has their number since Leo’s the one Hueso usually contacts. For now, Leo’s safe to continue as is.

Though his injuries are getting harder to hide, and there’s only so much his shell in particular can take.

So to speed things up, he incorporates the blindfold into his regular training.

His brothers question it, of course, but hey, he initially got the idea from seeing Lou Jitsu do it in the third best Lou Jitsu movie, so it comes as a great excuse now.

He’s only a little put off by how fast Mikey adapts to it when the others try.

“I dunno-“ Mikey shrugs when asked, “You guys shine so brightly anyway, a mask doesn’t do much.”

Seeing their mystic energies is pretty cool, Leo can admit.

He just wishes he could grasp that himself - and that it was useful for a death maze.

_____

Leo’s training pulls off eventually, and soon, after a few more losses, he wins a forth time. But it’s a near loss, and a near loss is the difference between someone living and dying.

He’s gotta go again.

Hueso’s more insistent than ever, though.

“You must stop, Pepino.”

“But I can do better-“

“You don’t have to! Your shell is bleeding - ¡por tu propio bien, poner fin a esto!”

“I told you, this is for their own good! For everyone’s own good!”

He forgets the pizzas when he leaves. He claims sickness when he hides under his covers.

He ignores how childish the act makes him feel.

_____

Leo’s getting better, and his reflexes and tact in training shows this. His other training of his subterfuge and medical skills also prove to be useful.

He’s pretty good at hiding injuries, now! Though not so good at hiding a pained shell. Even Donnie looks at him with blatant concern (and understanding) when Leo can’t help but take a sharp breath whenever he lands on his back.

It’s hard not to go right back into waving everything off with jokes like he used to. Deflections are easier when they’re annoying!

But- this is just another reason that he needs to get better, right? So his brothers won’t worry. He doesn’t need the spotlight anymore - he’s over that, thanks.

He squashes down the part of him that perks up when Splinter says he’s growing up. He actively kills the part of himself that cries at the same phrase.

_____

So. Yeah. This’ll be his twelfth time running the Maze. And, hopefully, his fifth win. Maybe he really will move on after this.

The Hidden City is pretty big! There’s probably a bigger challenge somewhere.

Maybe Big Mama has a more secret Nexus hidden away, out of the public eye.

Well, whatever. That’s a future problem for him to figure out, yeah? For now, he carries on like usual, teleporting to the entrance of the Maze and diving right in.

Even blindfolded, he works his way through, dodging and weaving and feeling as he goes. He even tries to evoke his inner Mikey and calls on his mystic energy. Not enough to cheat, but enough to feel.

Usually, when Leo teleports, he swears he feels every part of himself disperse into particles. Now, with energy thrumming under his scales, he can feel particles everywhere.

It’s not refined enough to tell him everything, and he gets a fun new burn and a nice whack to the back by getting distracted. Still, it gives him more than he had before. It makes him more aware of everything, like he licked a finger and held it in the air to feel the direction of wind, but every direction blew wind, all in different ways.

He makes it to the end with minimal injuries after that, and sure, his shell is screaming at him now, but he thinks he did a shell of a good job.

…Ah, he needs to cut that out, huh? Man. Maybe Donnie’s collar idea was a good call after all.

Leo needs to be a hero. Not a face man. Not a failure.

Not a kid.

_____

Leo doesn’t smile when the Minotaur takes his picture again for the champion wall, and he doesn’t listen when she tells him to “go home and never come back.”

He doesn’t plan to, anyway, yeesh.

He’s tired as he trudges out of the exit, and Hueso catches him when he stumbles.

Hueso doesn’t say anything. Leo doesn’t either.

Or, he doesn’t, until he feels a familiar large hand helping him up as well.

Leo’s face whips up as he flinches back, eyes wide as they meet with a worried (so, so worried) Raph’s.

“You told them?” Leo asks Hueso in betrayal, heart thudding wildly in his chest.

“Pepino…”

“Told us what?” Mikey pipes up from behind Raph, coming closer to get a better look at Leo, “Leo, what’s going on?”

“Your shell has been having pretty big setbacks on its healing, is this why?” Donnie demands, glaring fiercely as he motions toward the Maze.

Leo feels unmoored. “I-“

“Leo.” Raph interrupts, and no Leo doesn’t want to hear it- “Are you okay?”

And Leo wants to say “it’s not about me”. He wants to say anything that proved he learned his lesson, that he’s not a liability or worse, an active danger to his own family.

He wants Raph to continue being proud of him. He wants his brothers to trust him.

Instead, he passes out.

_____

The next time his eyes open, Leo’s on his side, staring at his blue lava lamp.

He knows without looking that his shell is re-bandaged. He knows his other injuries have been dealt with too.

And unless Leo learned how to do some pretty impressive medical sleepwalking, he knows he’s not getting away this time.

All three of his brothers being in his room prove that.

“What’s been going on, Leo?” Mikey asks, and his voice cracks partway through.

He’s looking at Leo like he’s searching for something, but Leo doesn’t have anything to show. Nothing’s hidden, he just did some light spring cleaning is all, throwing out all the parts he didn’t need.

All the parts they didn’t need.

And yet despite everything, he can feel himself falling back into old ways, a grin tugging at his beak and lackadaisical deflection on the tip of his tongue.

Maybe he should let that part of him show, just for once. It wouldn’t seem like too much of a setback would it? And he could really use a fun pun right about now-

No.

No it’s not about him. He needs to remember why he did all this in the first place.

“Okay- sorry, guys.” He smiles, softly, quietly, “I guess I got too caught up in training. I’ll work at it some more, don’t worry.”

“Oh, I see. Training. That’s all it was, huh? Training.” Donnie hisses more than says, nearly vibrating in anger.

“…yeah?” Leo nods slowly, because, uh, that’s literally the most honest thing he said. It was training.

“If it’s just “training” then why the secrecy, hm? Why in Curie’s good name did you prefer to sneak around rather than, oh, I don’t know, tell your family?”

Leo feels his shoulders rise at Donnie’s aggression, defensiveness welling up in him, “It was my training! Nothing went wrong, I’m getting better!”

“Better?” Raph asks incredulously, “Leo, you’re wasting away. A tap to the shell stuns you for minutes, you lost weight, and your dark circles are worse than Raph’s ever seen them! You aren’t getting better-!”

“YES I AM!”

The words rip out of Leo before he can stop them.

The room is silent as his brother look at him, all wearing expressions of hurt that Leo put there again.

“Yes I am.” Leo reiterates, shaking, “Because- if I’m not-“ He squeezes his eyes shut. “If I’m not-“

Then what was all this for?

Arms slowly wrap around him, and he knows now from the feel of the mystic that it’s Mikey.

“You’ve gotten faster, and sneakier.” Mikey says quietly. “When I accidentally cut my hand, you knew exactly how to take care of it.” His voice grows firm, and he backs out of the hug, “But those are your skills. You, though, you’ve been…you’ve been…”

“You’ve been dilapidating before our very eyes, and trying to hide it.” Donnie finishes, jaw tight. “You think we wouldn’t notice? After everything?” To Leo’s horror, Donnie’s voice is hoarse with tears, “You absolute dumb dumb.”

“I- but I need to train. The Maze is-“

“Leo, we don’t care that you ran through the Maze. We care you did it alone.” Raph says quietly. “We could have joined you, any time.”

“But- but I’m doing this for you-“

“Listen to your brothers, Blue.” They jump as a new voice joins the fray, heads turning to see Splinter make his way into the - frankly crowded - room.

“Dad, I-“ Leo begins, but trails off, suddenly more unsure than ever in the face of his father.

“It’s good you’re finally picking up training! Especially for your brothers’ sakes! But there’s such a thing as going overboard, you know.” Splinter pokes a sharp claw into Leo’s plastron, “Just because you’re dragging it out this time, doesn’t make this any less of a sacrifice. My son, you’ve taken after Karai an awful lot, haven’t you?”

Leo just looks at his father. At his brothers. Then, he looks down at his calloused hands, bandaged and scarred from overuse.

He swallows dryly. “Is that a bad thing?”

He feels his family crowd in around him, feels his father’s hand on his shoulder.

“It’s not wrong to want to be better, Leonardo.” Splinter says, softly and with so much grief and guilt that Leo can never begin to understand, “But you were never bad to begin with.”

Leo’s breath hitches.

“And-” Splinter’s hands rise up to frame Leo’s face. “You are much too young to ever consider sacrifice the best answer.”

“You got me to relax, Leo. So I’ll do the same for you.” Raph grins, eyes wet, “We’re still kids, right?”

And-

Leo smiles, watery but genuine. “Yeah, Raph. We are.”

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rottmnt headcanons #rise leo #rise fanfic #WHOOPS #did not mean to write all this #my only regret is not including April #anyway I was like wow Leo sure is acting different at the end of the movie huh #then I thought hey he’s actually acting a lot like previous iterations of Leo rn #then I ran with it and tripped down the stairs in the process #thus this was born!#I am tired so more tags later #but dang oops a bit too angsty gotta do smth lighthearted soon huh #also yes he DOES go back and apologize for putting Hueso through so much #he gets a smack on the head and a head pat immediately after #‘don’t do it again Pepino - not until I finally get the Maze shut down’ ‘okay wait what-‘

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allastoredeer · 10 months ago

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The Egg Bois have no one to take orders from after Sir Pentious dies. Then they see Lucifer and immediately follow him around and unlike Alastor who didn't like being tailed by the annoying yappy yokes, Lucifer is enthralled by them because they are like little ducklings forming a line as if Lucifer is their mother

One egg boi, Frank, is the only one that stuck to Alastor, and Al makes it clear he wants him to go away but Frank stays with him. One time when Al was cooking, Frank asked if he could help and Al thought for a moment, grinned, picked up the egg, and plopped him in the boiling pot. Unfortunately, Frank did not hard boil, in fact, he enjoyed the hot bath, and the rest of the egg bois ran inside as Lucifer entered the kitchen and screamed in horror at the display but the rest of the eggs hopped around Al's feet, pulling at his trousers asking to join the bubble bath.

FRANK STAYING WITH ALASTOR IS SO CUTE MY HEART JUST EXLODED

Alastor trying to boil Frank is just fogjwenweln 🤣 I can see that. The fact that it's not working AND Frank's enjoying himself AND the other eggbois want to join in makes it all so much better.

Also, the other eggbois following Lucifer around like ducklings 🥺 that's adorable.

#I saw a post about the eggbois forcefully adopting Alastor as their new “boss” after Sir Pentious dies #and I think about that a lot #Like they automatically flock to him because they're confused about where Pentious went #they have no one to direct them #and the last person who they did take orders from was Alastor #so they went straight to him #I think about it so much I'm actually considering writing a little one-shot about it #where Alastor is annoyed at first #but he grows kind of fond of them over time #they're like a bunch of little Niffty's but there's multiple of them and they don't have all of her feral gremlin energy #and ANGST TWIST #Alastor gets used to their presence and enjoys having them around #and then Heaven finds a way to get them back to Sir Pentious #but Alastor doesn't want them to go now #they're HIS eggbois #if Pentious wanted to keep them then maybe he shouldn't have died #huh?? did they ever think of that???#of course they didn't #lol #i love this #hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin alastor #the radio demon #lucifer morningstar #lucifer magne #hazbin lucifer #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel lucifer

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thegreatyin · 4 months ago

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And thus, with the passing of 24 hours, Caeru's ambition truly comes to an end. Major Nemesis spoilers below the cut- we're talking endgame ambition business here. Mostly on a character RP front.

The Doomed Scientist made quite a few... choice decisions, in the end. Killing Cups once and for all, recording his story as one of grief-

And sparing what little remained of Mr Mirrors, leaving it free to roam Parabola as it sees fit.

Some of them, he can explain. Others, he's still left to feel... discontent.

Cups needed to die. That much was certain from the start. It was a tyrant, as all Masters are, and complicit in the bargaining and eventual destruction of four (potentially five) cities, as all Masters are. It was an obstacle. A murderer. A petty monster that felt no remorse even on its deathbed, and it went out of its way to ruin multiple lives just because it felt owed its own sick and twisted idea of revenge.

It killed his first love. It looked him in the eyes and he knew what it had done and he knew from the start it was going to die.

Perhaps, in the end, it knew too. And yet it still pleaded, and wanted to live, and-

It made a bargain.

A bargain Caeru didn't take.

Not because he didn't want to. Gods, he wanted to. He wanted it. He wanted it more than anything else in the world. To have Greylu back, to give him the gift of life, of love, to show him the wonders of the Neath and the beauty of the correspondence and all of the people Caeru has met and loved and found home with along the way-

But. He couldn't.

Because Cups was a monster. And no matter what, it deserved to die. And he could not, in good conscience, allow it to live.

Even if sparing it meant everything he's ever wanted.

So he's left here, now. With a bloodied traveling coat, and a bloodsoaked knife, and a favor finally fulfilled.

And nothing to live for. No resurrected lover, no charming visits to Helicon, no slow dances in the living room, no memories to rebuild and lives to live and he won't live again-

Nothing. All he has is a coat born of obligation, not to his love, but to people he's never even met. To lives he's never even touched. To a paramour, still alive, with hair of rose-pink, who doesn't even remember her own brother's existence.

Cups didn't die for Caeru's sake. Cups died for the sake of all who wanted it dead. For the revenger's court, and the ghost screaming in his ear, and the reckoning that will not be postponed indefinitely.

And Caeru, who acted as a tool to carry out their wills? Who all but betrayed his own lover, just to satisfy a cause he never knew existed?

All Caeru is left with, is regret. Regret-

-And grief.

#yin-thoughts #fallen london #fallen london spoilers #nemesis spoilers #so! nemesis huh!#i have. a lot of thoughts #overall i think heart's desire remains closest to my heart #but that's almost certainly bc of the obvious ''you always remember your first'' bias #there's a lot of problems with nemesis that have been talked to death by other people way more eloquently than i could ever express #(the big notable stopgates littered throughout. the weird pacing at the end. the fact you never meet your actual nemesis til the finale)#but overall i still liked it a lot!! i loved it actually!!! it singlehandedly made me like cups as a master!!!!#not because of anything nemesis actually DID mind you. i just really liked making up things about it #in place of nemesis. actually featuring it.#which could either be a plus or a minus against the ambition depending on what angle you look at it from #but. yeah. i'd say i enjoyed it. i enjoyed it a whole bunch #and now that ive played 2 out of the 4 ambitions and my FL hyperfixation evidently isnt letting up #it's safe to say we're all here for the long haul #tune in (insert miscellaneous time in the future) for when i finally after like a year and a quarter #get to find out what the fuck truly goes down in light fingers #and also keep an eye out for that caeru-centric fic ive been unsubtly alluding to and still need to write.#ive got a whole outline for it and it's. well #you'll all see when (if?) i finish it #i have some ideas abt how i wanna play around with the nemesis endings + what they mean to caeru #(and i do mean endings as in both of them)#and it all may seem. insane. when we get there #but i swear i have a direction plotted in my head #i swear #scoundrelventures #<- the scoundrel isnt mentioned At All in this post but that works as a general FL oc lore tag

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ghastigiggles · 8 months ago

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ive just come across your blog and your fics are seriously the cutest… plus you’re a wlw writer!! hopefully you’re still doing the mischievous prompts, if you are… may i request lee!acheron x ler!blackswan with “and what are you going to do, tickle me?” I could totally imagine acheron saying this as a joke and blackswan’s face lighting up thinking actually… thats a great idea!

Mischievious Prompts [Temporarily Closed]

“It occurs to me,” Black Swan lilts, “That you aren’t often close with people. Physically.”

“It wouldn’t take a Memokeeper to figure that out.”

Her laugh is soft and melodic, a sound that makes Acheron shut her eyes, soothed and comforted; a latent part of her wonders if that’s just the effect a Memokeeper’s voice has on a person. Her heart knows it’s not. Either way, she could easily get used to the gentle pressure on her side, and the arm wrapped around her waist. The weight of the Memokeeper’s head on her shoulder.

“Where does this observation come from?”

“You seem tense, is all – even though you know I’m not a threat to you. My every touch is tender and sweet, yet you don’t seem to know how to take it. I don’t think it’s conscious on your behalf, but it affects you regardless. That much is plain.”

“Is it a problem?”

“I suppose not,” She concedes; “But I would like to help ease that tension for you. You deserve that much.”

The emanator opened her eyes at that, and tilted her head to inspect Black Swan with vacant curiosity.

“And what are you going to do to achieve that?”

“Patience, my dear emanator.”

Black Swan purred into her ear, squeezing her gently in a sideways embrace that Acheron by no means hated. She felt the Memokeeper’s hand slide against her side, tugging her jacket back enough to expose the skin further – and Acheron didn’t stop her.

The tracing started pleasant enough, a gentle rubbing that slowly got lighter and lighter, until it teased her nerves into a state of prickly unrest that made the corners of her mouth twitch unbidden and her arm start to fall in opposition.

“... Tickle me?”

The unsteadily spoken words were meant to be a continuation of her prior question – but Black Swan, with a gentle chuckle, took it as bait, digging in her fingers a bit more persistently to earn a quiet squeal from Acheron as the emanator jolted and folded against her, pressing into her body.

“Gladly.”

She couldn’t say that it really relaxed her much at all, with how much she squirmed – but she relished every gentle touch regardless, and didn’t mind much about her loss of composure at all. She was simply glad it was the Memokeeper.

#mine #hsr tickles #honkai star rail tickles #acheron #black swan #acheswan #WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS IS THE FIRST ACHESWAN IVE WRITTEN. HUH.#i cant believe i waited this long and did them so dirty oughh #ok i dont wanna get your hopes up. but i actually had a lot more thoughts while writing this so i might come back to it and build off of it #MIGHT. BIG MIGHT.#anyway i love these two and really wanted to write something that was more soft than rough&tumble like the rest of the requests #i have 1 other 'soft' request in the box after this one that i'm looking forward to writing #and then my personal thing #and THEN once all the rest are written. rqs will open up again

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cultivating-wildflowers · 1 year ago

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📒

#listened to a podcast on commonplace books last night and realized that many people do not actually use...a book #which was perhaps something of an obvious revelation but it remains revelatory to me #two of the guys in the discussion use physical note cards and one uses evernote (or did four years ago) so I thought 'huh'#'maybe I'll try evernote'#cut to me checking out four different cloud-based note-taking systems because evernote doesn't allow for nearly as much personalization #--with their free version as they used to #all that to say I then opened up The Problem of Pain to copy over the sections I've highlighted anddddd there are a lot more than I thought #the reason I really really want to get into this system is I want a way to organize my various trains of thought #so I can carry on a coherent discussion if the need arises #but also the one guy who uses the cloud-based system also has a whole section of his commonplace dedicated to quotes from friends and famil #which 1) reminded me of Kate always keeping a quote book for her various trips #and 2) reminded me of all of the quotes I've saved over the years from friends #it's just a fun little detail #and FINALLY while discussing this they mentioned a student who received glowing feedback on an assignment and told her friend she was--#putting it in her 'flex book' -- AKA the book of things she can look at when she wants to flex on herself #which I think a lot of us creatives especially can benefit from #(I have a little collection of kind feedback I've received on my writing)#(which has come in handy lately)#so! I am once again attempting to compile a commonplace book #and telling myself as I go that there's no harm in not having started this ten years ago and I will in fact survive #if you made it this far I love you and please be sure you're drinking enough water

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the-sea-anemone · 11 months ago

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ok i'm going to ask a stupid question but please keep in mind that i'm jewish so to me easter is just like. a couple of surprise extra days off roughly around the same time as passover.

with that out of the way: so there's good friday and easter monday, right? but when people talk about "easter," do they just mean the monday, or do they mean both days? are saturday and sunday also easter, or are there just two regular days in the middle of the holiday? or is it two separate but related holidays with two normal days in the middle?

#scrolling through tumblr this morning like “huh a bunch of people are talking about visiting their families what a strange coincidence”#also i'm in the thesis-writing year of my MA and work from home a lot bc i don't actually *have* to be on campus that often #which makes holidays even more of a surprise since they don't affect my schedule #except when i'm trying to run errands and am like. wait why is everything mysteriously closed #(i did google it so i think i know the answer but i'm curious about what the consensus is)

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llycaons · 4 months ago

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not wangxian though. it's one of the 10% which are actually good

#I was going to write an essay in the tags to justify why they're not klance but I don't actually need to. they're just good characters #with a compelling and fairly unique relationship #YES it has its issues and its cliches and its eye-rolling moments of predictability but #but the way their characters relate to each other and the plot is genuinely really well-thought out #and carefully constructed. lwj is a little underdeveloped #but wwx is a phenomenally complex character. and their storylines and journeys cannot exist #without their intimate relationship and they impact each other on that journey #it's central to the plot even in censored adaptations and it's central thematically with a care that most gaybait of the day isn't #with the exception of like. house. granted something crazy was going on with house #but the fact that they're canon/intentionally written as romantic partners actually does add a lot to their relationship...crazy...#wow I did write a lot huh. well anyway I saw sherlock. I saw voltron. I saw the new star wars. none of those fan couples #have anything interesting or new to say or say it in a unique way either. extremely painfully generic #not wx tho. wx hit so many heights and then kept climbing. numero uno #cor.txt

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nekropsii · 2 years ago

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Woof, I really haven't been posting lately, apologies everyone!

I've been hard at work on scripting for Sovereignstuck lately. A lot has been getting done recently with regards to the project. I can only assume some of y'all guessed that already considering I dropped off the face of the earth pretty soon after the T-Minus 100 Days Showcase. Well over 100+ pages have been written into their final drafts, and I'm still working hard. I haven't had much time/energy to blog with all that on my plate- it takes a lot of time and energy to write, especially considering the approach I'm taking to it!! Thank you all for your patience. I do hope you all enjoy the final product once it begins to release on 9/19.

As a general life update though, my tablet recently broke. F in chat for a real one, I've had that thing for years. Luckily, I was able to acquire a new one a few days ago, and while it is undoubtedly better than the last one, adjusting to it is quite difficult... Once again, I had the previous one for several years, and autism hates changes like that, lol.

I'll continue posting sporadically, but I cannot promise absolute consistency. I'll try and continue giving updates like this, though!!

Thanks to all who read this, and I'll see you again soon!

#also got into a polycule lately but that isnt too important #its definitely another major reason i havent been posting much. too busy writing and spending time with the boys #im more active in the sovstuck fan discord lately lmao #anyways... man. 78 days until sovstuck huh? it's pulling up fast!!#i do hope you all will like it. this is actually my first webcomic #not my first published work though. i did learn a lot from that one. but this is definitely my first comic #trying my best!#sovereignstuck #nekro.txt

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sn4kebites · 2 years ago

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i perceive bkg as demisexual and people are free to write him however but a lot of his character just does not make sense to me unless i view him as primarily gay

#his demiromantic / demisexuality allows me to generally write him however but like. i really think that guy likes men #i think the concept of physical attraction is genuinely lost on him too like the emotional bond is key #but its WAYY easier to form emotional bonds with men and connect to other men #also. completely realizing that this applies to my fics #like a healthy amount of my fics for him SPECIFICALLY are afab but gn. oh wow i did not realize that i was even doing that #LMFAOKJDSKJ. DAMN #I DIDNT REALIZE I WAS DOING THAT #i feel like people just read my fics as fem reader no matter how gn i make them #which is fine but i do actually just make them gn a lot huh. hm #GOT DERAILED

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aweisz · 1 year ago

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me a couple days ago: oooooh i love this whumptober prompt for the 9th i'll do such an elaborate thing oooooh

me on the 9th: why does drawing involve drawing

#well. i could write it. maybe it would be better as a drabble.#hmm #i can't write for shit tho (<- has three fics published on ao3)(<- people even liked them)#it would need a lot of description ugh #im ok at getting into a character's head and writing out their thoughts #like in a stream of consciousness kind of way #huh. it would actually be pretty good for whump. wow #but this specific prompt that i really want to use needs description. and actions. and dialogue which im very bad at #man #on a second thought. FUCK IT im writing it #it WILL be bad. i do not know how to speak. esp english.#but i will get into that guy's head and dissect his brain. ooough #i'll probably post it with a drawing that i did a couple days ago. it won't fit exactly but 🧑‍🏭

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whumpy-wyrms · 10 months ago

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rereading TLLR for like the first time and damn this series is amazing it’s got all my favorite tropes and everything wow the author sure has good taste. wait i wrote this? i wrote this???? that’s so crazy

#/pos #i love tllr so much guys #woahhh #i literally can’t stand rereading my old writing but i’m forcing myself because otherwise i literally forget what i wrote #i’m actually cryinf guys i love basil so much WHY DID I DOOO THATTTTT #anton’s giving me some emotional support it’s okay #also i’m editing it as i go. just correcting spelling/grammar/punctuation mistakes because. wow there was a lot #how did i get away with that huh #wyrms says stuff #it has all my favorite tropes on purpose that’s the point

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pyrriax · 11 months ago

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so maybe ive actually had a lot more thoughts in my head than i give myself credit for. ive been having fun just writing Everything down, even stuff that i know probably won't go anywhere in the end. i'm writing it down because Maybe one day i'll just dump a bunch of my plot bunnies in a document/post and let people have at them.

so far there are twelve footnotes on my document for today, almost all of them are relating to inspiration and things that've never been written down but are integral to several AUs and worlds, along with elaboration that would've broken the flow of the actual written portion.

#haunted ecosystem #once i get most of my ideas written down (probably over three/four days) *then* we'll start actually getting into the part of this since c #coming up with thing #im still planning to write a drabble about some art i saw (have the tab open and everything) along with another unrelated piece that's #captivated my interest with its general vibe and dialogue. it reminded me a lot of the og centurion plot mixed with current seraphim vibes #<- hey tumblr wtf did you do to my tags actually. huh #i promise these made sense but i already forgot what i put in them

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zeawesomebirdie · 1 year ago

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Okay I was only going to vague about my old Zelda wips in the tags but oh my fucking god okay. So the Fronk/Ledo fic. I somehow managed to forget what inspired me to write it in the first place was my (at the time) boyfriend ?????? Hello?????? At least now I'm confident enough in my gore and horror to make it line up with my true nature

#vent post #not actually a vent lmao but thats the tag #like girl????#how did i get *this* out of *that* relationship #huh #anyway my writing got a lot better once i became single #its easier to write feral stuff now and i love it for me #so when this fic inevitably comes out of dormancy it will be the glorious filth that i always do these days 😌

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arielmagicesi · 2 years ago

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ugggghhh ok so I’m reading some books to prep for my student teaching in the fall, the ones that my host teacher knows are likely to be in the curriculum, and first of all why is it a thing that high schoolers are made to read Contemporary Lit Fic that can be summed up as “how many gory explicit descriptions of traumatic abuse can we fit into one book”, like every year it’s just One Standard Shakespeare Play, One Twentieth-Century American Classic, throw in some other shit, and Somebody’s Fucked-Up Memoir From A Decade Or So Ago. Are there any contemporary books that are good but NOT traumatizing? If not, I’m happy to stick to classic lit personally

ANYWAY so I’m reading this book to prep for the fall and I ended up skimming the whole latter 3/4 or so of the book to spoil it for myself so the suspense wouldn’t kill me, and now I’m up late despite being super tired because my brain is just cycling through every horrific thing in the book, plus the reviews I read online, some of which are insanely saying shit like “wah wah, get over it, stop whining, we all had rough times in our childhood” and I’m like... Am I the softest, most naive baby on the planet for reacting to this horrific memoir by feeling bad for the author and thinking that maybe we don’t need to be making high schoolers read this? I’m not saying it’s not well-written- it is well-written, and well-structured, but Jesus Christ.

(also why are we allowed to make students read horrifying memoirs of abuse but god forbid they know that slavery happened in this country, but that’s a different issue altogether)

so yeah I now have managed to make my entire evening about Trying And Failing To Get Some Images Out of My Head, which sucks because I had a LOVELY day and was looking forward to some well-earned sleep, and also I’m gonna have to go back and read the entire book so that I’m able to teach it properly and know all the literary devices in it and shit. Cool cool cool

#this is the same classroom where i did my student observing and their 'holocaust book' was this book called sarah's key #which is also unnecessarily traumatizing but doesn't even have the decency to be written well #and i asked my host teacher like 'hey. do we provide any like... emotional support to the students when they read That Scene'#and she was like 'yeah i have them write a response paper about their emotions reading the scene'#and idk i'm not 100% sure that's enough?#i know high schoolers put on a big song and dance about how edgy they are and how they can handle seeing any fucked-up shit #and some of them really do unfortunately have to live with fucked-up shit for real #but like. they're still humans? who are growing and developing? let's maybe give them breathing room with these things?#i love my host teacher she's great but i'm not confident she's gonna provide a lot of emotional support re: this memoir to the students #she's also way tougher and more resilient than i am. and so are most of the students tbh. i'm a tiny baby kitten and i know this #still i feel like we should probably allow some room for acknowledging Yeah That Was Fucked Up Huh #It's Normal To Feel Sad Now Actually #ANY THE FUCKING WAY. wish i'd gone to sleep early like i planned #at least it's the weekend tomorrow and all i have to do is go prove i don't have tuberculosis. again!!!!#(not that i had tuberculosis before. i just got tested before but it was over 6 months ago so not good enough)#that's also for student teaching!#i feel like my personal posts on this blog are just a psa on why not to become a teacher #i swear i love teaching lol but i love kvetching more #written by me

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