#i about died laughing when this happened

[seizeourdestiny]

ALLEY OOP

[lazylittledragon]

what do you get when you have a very uncoordinated child, a glass door and a single dad who sometimes forgets both of these things

[ghost-proofbaby]

i just imagined the most cursed/dumb experience you could have with eddie and now i need to put you all through it with me.

imagine getting insanely high with eddie and playing around with one of those stress balls with the netting. like the kind that change color when you squeeze it. and you're just squishing it, fiddling mindlessly, before suddenly looking up at eddie with the worst possible idea.

"eddie... do you think they...?"

and him being so wide-eyed, immediately catching on, "absolutely not."

but then, you're both high, and you're both prone to having the dumbest fucking ideas possible, so when eddie catches sight of your fishnets peeking out of the drawer across the room, he can't help himself from saying the dumbest possible thing to ever come out of his mouth.

"but wanna find out?"

the night ends with the two of you in the ER, and eddie deciding it doesn't matter how much he likes you in fishnets, the two of you will never have another pair in the household again.

please don't take this serious i'm going to cry from how fucking stupid this is

[epiphainie]

i was gonna share a tweet that went smth like 'boyfriend gets upset if i say i'm gonna kill myself so now i add "and then i come back to life"' with 'this is bucktommy' but i changed my mind. i think tommy would just join in on the lightning strike jokes as the others look at the two of them in horror

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Well, at least Fukuzawa got his wish granted, I guess.... he's finally inside Fukuchi <3

[worstloki]

Thor sweating as he tries to get Odin off him about marriage to Lady Sif: I--I already have a woman I intend to marry!!!!! Thor: [covers mouth in regret] Odin: Oh? And who might it be? Thor: [muffled] an... elf? Odin, narrowing his eyes: ...an elf. Thor: she's from another realm, you wouldn't know her!

[kindahoping4forever]

Luke and Ash with fans today

[faaun]

idk how to live so im going to talk to myself out loud until i do

[lgbtlunaverse]

It's a really heartwrenching sequence as it's happening but looking back at the part where jgy grabs jin ling as a hostage in guanyin temple I always crack up when he starts to assure everyone that he really likes a-ling, actually! He practically raised him, he really doesn't want to hurt him so don't worry and please just do as he says.

A-yao. Sweetheart. The point of taking a hostage is that the people you're negotiating with believe you're going to kill the hostage so you can use their wellbeing as a bargaining chip. Saying "Oh yeah I really like this hostage I don't want to hurt him" kind of ruins the point of a hostage. What are you doing?

[trashvampiree]

thinking about how hard Michael stares at Star the first time he sees her, bro isn't even just checking her out at that point he's fucking READING her

[theoscelosaurus]

(bit of a vent lol)

So. I get a lot of derision for 'giving up as soon as things get hard' and in some ways I get it. I know how it looks but I just– I'm so. so fucking tired of hearing 'just try, you'll see it isn't so bad'

As if I haven't tried. As if I don't know full well that it is that bad. It took 3 months of 'just pushing myself' to almost kill me. It sounds so stupid when I say it like that and I don't think ppl would really get it even if I told them, i mean how could they? I barely know what happened and I was there

It took me 3 months to go from being student at a top 5 university with the single minded goal of getting a PhD in theoretical quantum mechanics to not being able to read.

I couldn't talk; no matter how hard I tried the words were so slurred people couldn't understand what i was saying (not that I would have understood it if they replied). I've been an artist my entire life but I couldn't remember how to hold a pencil, let alone how to drink a glass of water without pouring it all over myself.

It didn't kill me but it killed every part of me I cared to keep alive. It's been 3 years and while I can paint and hold an only slightly stilted conversation and do just enough of everything to get by I'm nowhere near the person I was and I don't think I ever will be.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't in pain and I spend an average of 18h a day in bed. But yeah. If I just try a bit harder this time, care a bit more. As if I don't live every day with the knowledge that if push came to shove I would rather die than risk ever experience it again

And yeah, that does mean I would rather die than get a job. I don't care how childish that sounds it is not worth it, it is never ever going to be worth it

[pixelizedprince]

X

[beheadedcousins]

found this at goodwill saturday, and my first thought was i think farrah would want to have this giant flask ironically because of the size and she just thinks it's funny. she has no intention of ever using it.

[longagoitwastuesday]

Going through the Utahim.e tag had me checking several times if at some point I had clicked on the G.ojo/Utahim.e one instead

[lierenprotectionsquad]

The difference between someone who hates Aris

Me: I really like Aris

Person: ugh I hate him

Me: oh

Person: yeah

And someone who hates Teresa

Me: so where did you wanna go for dinner?

Person: I hate Teresa so much she betrayed Thomas and hurt Minho and she killed Newt she deserved to die I laughed when she committed suicide

Me: … that’s not what I asked you

[the-cooler-king]

One of those texts I kind of need to sit on before I decide how I'm going to word it.

I never know how to start these, but I always have an idea on what to say. Your opinion of me actually matters a lot & the implication that you believe that I lie to you or I'm not doing enough is kinda hurtful. It comes across to me like my effort is worthless to you & that what I want doesn't matter at all. I wouldn't bring it up if I didn't think you cared, and I know you're going through a lot and shouldn't have to worry about me, but I'm getting mixed signals that are really throwing me off. What do you want from me? Am I asking too much of you and you don't know how to tell me? I sincerely want to be there for you, regardless of what it looks like to get to that point, but if you don't want me there you can tell me! What you want matters just as much, if not more, to me. I'm not the kind of person to be hostile about things if they don't work out. I don't want to be another source of stress or negativity for you, and I don't want you to be afraid of being honest with me. I constantly question if you're just too nice to tell me you aren't interested anymore, and even if you are, I might need more reassurance than you can give me because I don't think I'm very worth it to anyone for anything. If you don't think I'm trying hard enough then tell me what I need to do to change that! I'm at the point of just not knowing what I bring to your life, if anything at all. You don't need to deal with me on top of everything else, so, I'm sorry for this. Even if you don't text me back I'll feel better once I get it out there. The only thing I've ever been afraid of is not communicating exactly how much I care about you & how much you mean to me - even if it doesn't matter to you, or you don't believe me. If there comes a day where we aren't in each other's lives anymore for whatever reason, I don't want either of us to question what could've been said or done differently or regret not doing more.