#i NEED to be sure of what he thinks of ivan you don't understand

[dulcelem]

Seeing things from Till's perspective, everything must be so very confusing. Like his life is getting progressively worse than it already was, the person who is his only source of comfort and hope has disappeared and may have died(he failed to protect her. she is the only reason he stayed in his own private hell, the reason he gave up his longed for freedom from the aliens and he failed). He was completely alone and on top of that he was being abused, dehumanized and violated in every way possible. Gradually losing all motivation and strength until he became so depressed that the sense of self and danger no longer exists.

Then, he's going to sing in a deadly competition against this boy he was kind of friends with when they were kids. He was kinda weird and got on Till's nerves occasionally, but yeah they played together, they fought sometimes and one time he sort of offered all the freedom in the world outside of that place for some reason. But anyway, life has no more meaning so he gives up singing and decides to die. Understandable.

But, out of the absolute NOWHERE, that boy who was almost his friend kisses him(??????) for no reason and he doesn't stop. Then, as if it wasn't already fucking weird, Ivan chokes Till. And. Honestly. It makes more sense. Maybe Ivan has a desire to live or something. He doesn't tho. Not right now. Or, who knows, Ivan was taking out his anger on him because if only Till had agreed to run away with him that night, they wouldn't be in this situation. Practically suicidal, he accepts death by Ivan's hands. But then, out of nowhere(again) Ivan FALLS TO THE GROUND with BLOOD DRAINING from his mouth. And he DIES. His plan to die was over and Ivan died for him without any explanation or warning.

Many people say he is sad or angry, but I swear I think this man is in the deepest state of shock. He hadn't been able to move an inch since the end of the performance and stared at Ivan's dead body until the lights went out. He wasn't conscious enough to even try to stop the bleeding. I'm very curious to see how he will react to all this

[mochinek0]

Looking Back (Part 1)

Adrien couldn't help but look at Marinette across the room. The only thing that bothered him so much was that she was there with her husband, Damian Wayne. He saw the smile he missed; saw her laughing with friends. He could see how close she was to him, every time she turned and looked at him to continue the story.

"How did you meet your husband, Marinette?"

"Yeah he doesn't look familiar."

"Did he go to school with us; I feel like I would have remembered him."

"Uncle Jagged took me on tour when I graduated, half way through the year, and I met Damian during one of the stops." Marinette answered.

Adrien looked away and noticed his friends were uncomfortable. Some people, those closest to Mari, stopped listening to Lila. Kitty Section had launched to stardom with their amazing clothes, lyrics and Jagged Stones backing. The others…..'Did I do the right thing?' was running across their minds.

"Hey, let's get out of here for a bit." Kim spoke, "I need a drink.

"Alya nodded, "It's….unnerving, right now."

"I don't know." Nino declared.

"It'll only be for an hour." Kim sighed, "There's a place to drink a block away. We can walk over and back."

"We can take my car." Adrien smiled, "I'll probably only have one drink."

Outnumbered, Nino groaned, "I'll drive us back."

After a quick round up, they left to a near by bar.

"This isn't how I expected this reunion to go!" Alya whined, "I thought Marinette would be miserable and we would be telling her, 'You should have be nicer to Lila'. Why is her life; her friends' life, better than ours?"

"Odine broke up with me two months after she found out that I had pulled a prank on Marinette when we were twelve." Kim sighed, "She never got over it. She said I was heartless and a monster to do that to a girl. She said she would be terrified of having daughters with me. I wasn't even thinking that far ahead."

"Looks like you are now." Nathaniel stated.

"I- She was the first girl to confess to me and our dates weren't horrible!" Kim retorted.

Alix chuckled, "Thought that was Marinette."

The former swimmer growled, "Shut up! It's not my fault that girls only want some slim-fit guy!"

"Mylene and Ivan are married." Nino pointed out, "Neither of them are 'slim-fit'."

"That's right!" Alya shouted, "You're blaming us, but guys only want model types. Where's the love for curvy girls, huh? Show me thicc love, dammit!"

"I don't know." Kim spoke, "Where did it go, Nino?"

The DJ rolled his eyes, "It was a mutual break up. We had conflicting schedules and barely had time to talk to each other. It was a ten minute talk at most and then class or sleep. Even now, most dates I've had have been coffee because I'm tired after a gig."

Nino realized his best friend had been quiet so far. He was sure he would have defended himself when his long-time ex brought up models. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted five shot glasses.

"Hey, Dude, are you okay?" Nino questioned, "You ususally don't drink this much."

Adrien turned to Nino and pouted, "I should have married Marinette."

The model didn't expect the table to erupt in laughter.

"Nice one, Dude." Nino smiled, "I understand you want to be included."

"I'm serious!" Adrien whined.

"Dude, if you really feel that way, you only have yourself to blame." his best friend stated.

"Huh?" Adrien replied, confused.

"You were the blindest idiot, as a teen." Alix cackled.

Alya rolled her eyes, "Mari was head over heels for you. It's why she bullied Lila, duh."

Adrien tried to shake off the alcohol, "Bullied Lila?"

Alya took another sip, "You know because you and Lila were dating."

"I would never date that Bitch!" the model shouted.

Everyone froze and looked at him.

"What?" Kim questioned.

"I never dated Lila." the Agreste heir snarled, "I would have never-She's not my type. Fuck, I would never date a model, period. I have always hated modeling; both Chloe and Mari knew that. I did it to get my father's attention."

Everyone looked at each other as the web of lies began to untangle in front of them. After all these years, the thread had begun to snap.

"You all thought Mari was bullying Lila because she liked me?" Adrien continued to rant, "You forget she helped me get with Kagami. Kagami even told me she tried to get us back together. Hell, 'Gami had a crush on her, but ended up with Felix instead. She still says that if Mari suddenly wanted to get together, she'd drop Felix."

No one knew what to say. Everything they thought they knew, that kept them as friends was slowly coming undone. They had been 'Team Lila' for the longest time and now….what were they? Adrien never dated Lila. Adrien said he would never date her. He believed Marinette wouldn’t bully Lila simply because Lila had feelings for him because Marinette helped him get a girlfriend. If that was all true, why did Lila say they dated? Why did she say Marinette bullied her? As if a distant echo, they recalled Marinette calling their friend a liar. Had Lila really lied to them all this time?

Kim let out a loud belch, "Like we believe that." his speech slurring.

"You're saying I'm lying?" Adrien questioned.

Mr. 'Just A Friend' had feelings for her?" Kim answered, "Yeah, right."

"Mr. what?" Adrien asked.

"It's your catchphrase." the former swimmer laughed, "I'm sure you all remember. 'Who, Marinette? No! She's just a friend. She's a good friend. She's a great friend. You'll like her once you get to know her and be friends with her. She's an amazing friend'."

Alix yawned, getting bored of the dying party, "You had 'FRIENDZONE' tattooed on your forehead."

Alya relaxed. She had been so close to believeing that she had betrayed the wrong person, but Adrien having feelings for Marinette was laughable at this point.

"Marinette obviously got tired of hearing how much of a 'friend' she was to you." Alya declared, "The shit I had to listen to when we were friends! How 'dreamy' you looked. The names of you imaginary kids! You two gettign a hamster."

"She found someone better." Alix shrugged, "He's taller and looks strong as hell. The only things you share in common are green eyes and wealthy families."

"Gold digging, Bitch." Alya snarled.

"I thought that, too." Alix admitted, "From what Juleka tells me, Marinette makes more than Adrien alone on her fashion commissions. That's without using her muscle hubby or his family name. Rose said that not even Luka compares. Kitty Section went with them to the Caribbean and …muscles and scars. Said Mari couldn't keep her eyes of him and they barely saw her after that."

"Demon God." muttered Nathaniel.

"Demon God?" questioned Nino.

"His brothers call him 'Demon Spawn', but he's chiseled like the sexy Lucifer marble statues that the church said no to." Nathaniel groaned, "I should have taken my chance, too."

Nino glanced at Adrien and saw him tearing up.

'Shit.'

"Okay, I think we get the idea." the DJ stated, trying to change the subject.

"Alya's right. We tried to get them together so many times, but he always thought they were 'friendly outings' even though eveyone had a date." Kim continued.

Nathaniel took another shot, "Imagine getting kissed by the most popular girl at school and thinking she was 'just being nice'."

"Lila?" Alya replied, "I thought-"

"Lila was popular in class, only." Nathaniel answered, "Marinette was popular all over school. The true 'Queen' of the school."

Adrien quickly stood up, scraping his chair against the floor, and rushed out. Nino quickly rushed out after him.

"What's his problem?" Kim asked.

Alya's eyes trailed after Nino's back before she took another drink and turned back to the group.

Nino quickly spotted Adrien's car. He slowly approached it and found him sobbing in the passenger's seat.

'At least he didn't think he could drive.'

Nino walked around and sat in the driver's side. He simply patted his friend's back.

"Did-Is what Kim said true?" Adrien asked.

Nino unintentionally paused his hand's movements, trying to decide what would be best.

"Nino!" Adrien shouted, "You're my best friend! Is what-"

"Yes." he answered.

He could feel the weight of Adrien's gaze on him.

"We did try setting you up with Marinette." Nino spoke, calmly, "Everyone in the school could see she liked you. I don’t know when she stopped; we truly believed that she was mean to Lila because Lila was with you."

"Not in a million years." Adrien replied.

"You sure?" Nino asked, looking at his friend.

"Not even if it brought my mother back." Adrien growled, "I can't stand her."

Nino started the car as Adrien sunk into his seat. They drove in silence, but he faintly heard the model's sniffles. He knew Adrien might not possibly remember the night and he didn't want to say anything that was too damaging. It was a conversation for another time…if there ever was.

Adrien thanked Nino as they got out of the car and he took the keys form him, "She looked happy tonight, didn't she? Her smiles were always the brightest."

Nino watched as tears fell down his friend's cheeks. Adrien quickly turned and went inside. Nino sighed and took out his phone.

"Yo, Max. I need a ride." he spoke, "Got a minute to spare?"

[asmolfolk]

Hi! Sooo, theres a tiktok video that is "Ivan, how did you bag that baddie?" and this come to my mind: Tesla, Buddha, Sasaki, Jack and Ares (separate) hcs with a s/o like that? They're like: Idk how, but she picks me up like I'm nothing. Let's just say I can imagine it, lol - Sorry for my English and kisses from Brazil <3

Oh my! A fellow brazilian! I'm also brazilian, so, kisses from the southeast part of Brazil &lt;3 Hope you liked this one, I really loved to make this one, it was very fun!

🥀♥︎.•° Fandom: Shuumatsu no Valkyrie. Characters: Nikola Tesla, Sasaki Kojiro, Jack the Ripper, Buddha and Ares (Separate) Ask: Inspired by the video 'Ivan, how did you bag that baddie?' 🦋♥︎.•°

Nikola Tesla

"Tesla, how did you bag that baddie?" The one who asked him was his friend, Robert... And that got him... Thoughtful. Tesla looked to the side, looking directly at your direction...

He was thinking about the differences between the two of you... And the similarities too. How you react to things, how you smile, how you show affection or interess in something... He is thinking all of those things at the same time. It would be a reason to "Why he stayed", after all, he never showed any interest in love or relationships that were romantical... But seeing that you were just like a Math question... [A lot of outcomes - Needs hard work and understanding to seek the problem...] That was enough to make his mind so... Full of love and interest. Of course, he couldn't not remember how did 'he bag this baddie'... Spoiler, he didn't. He still remember the day you just looked at him and straight up said "Oh, I don't have this color yet" and just picked him up like a cat and walked with him in your arms. He would tell anyone who saw that the exact thing "I accept it for cience!" But the truth was that he just didn't care to be holded... He liked that and the fact that he could still write his notes was a plus one. Since that, both of you started to talk and later on, date... It is still a surprise to most of Tesla's friends... He can still remember the first dates... And now, you are his... Girlfriend, aren't?... He can't be happier. You respect his space and actually, you were the one to start a lot of intimacy stuff with him... You seemed to always knew when he wanted something or when he acknowledges that you want something from him, but was too tired or busy and didn't want to leave you feeling unwanted by his lack of effort... So you - seeming to read his mind - do exactly what he wanted and started to give him some words of affirmation and to be sure that he knows that it's okay to not fit into some category... Or to not want to do something like sex, PDA or others.

It seemed like a he was off for some seconds IRL while in his mind, he just saw yours love story together... When he noticed that, he knew... He knew his answer. He looked to Robert and started his monologue. "Oh, you are surely mistaken, my dear friend. I'm aware of what could give the impression for you to think like that... But!" He stands there, smilling as if he is explaining math to someone "She, indeed, picked me up and straightly putted me into a consensual relationship that I do really, extremely, like." He puts a hand over his heart, as to give emphasys to his next words "This woman has a exceptional mind and strenght... Aren't I a lucky guy? Her mind is as brilliant as mine... Of course, in Differents/Same matters... Do you understand, Robert?" Robert is lost in words, he doesn't know what to say or what to do... After all, he just saw all of his - 'Don't want to date' - friend being so deeply in love with someone... He could only chuckle as his wife carries a surprise and shocked expression. "Oh my! I'm so happy that you found someone that matches you perfectly, Tesla! And her body is so pretty too... She would look awesome in a wedding dress, don't you think so?" "Hm... Wedding? I think it's a strange concept... But if she wants one..." Tesla, even having his disagreements over weddings... He couldn't say no to you. After all... You are his everything.

Sasaki

"Kojiro Sasaki, how did a loser like you bag that baddie over there?" It was the question of his opponent... He was looking directly at your face, seeing how it changed... After all, you were in fiery! How dare them say call Sasaki a loser... And before you could start approaching to 'ora ora' this person face, Sasaki holded your hand to stop you and smiled brightly. "Well... I may be a loser in battle... But she picked me from the ground and made me her boyfriend, resuming the whole story" He told his opponent as he chuckles as he feels you pinching his cheecks a bit "Ow-Ow! Sorry, sweetheart..." He laughing a bit. "It was nothing like that. I saw him on the ground and thought he was deeply hurt, so I carry him home so I could take care of him." You said, explaining it better than Sasaki resume... Or trying to. "...Okay...? Look, I don't really care..." Sasaki's opponent tried to say that but he wasn't heard, now, Sasaki and you were discussing about this first meeting and he seemed overly in joy after hearing your version of the facts. "So... How were you capeable to hold me?" He finally asked "I mean, I'm pretty heavy-" "I carry boxes that weight more than you, Sasaki."

Jack the Ripper

"How a serial killer like you got to bag that baddie?!" That was the question of Hlökk, who was actually curious to know more about this whole relationship between the two of you... After all, nobody seemed to know about Jack's partner. "Oh my... Well, it's interesting that you asked me this... Well, may I just tell you..." He said with his british accent and sweet tone appearing, he was at your side, holding your hand while looking directly at Hlökk. "She was the one and only who got me, who actually had me on her arms... When she was carrying me around." As he said it, his other hand started patting your head "Isn't it the most romantical and sweet thing someone could ever do to their partner? Carrying them around like they weight nothing" His explanation was not meant to make you feel that proud of yourself... Or to blush like you did. But in a way or other, you could only feel how much you matter and is loved by him... He is trully a gentleman. "EWWW, YOU CLINGY OLD MAN!" Hlokk seemed to think in a different way.

Buddha

"Buddha, my deaaaar friend. How did you manage to bag this baddie?!" Said Zeus... The sluttiest god "Oh my me! You should help me get a baddie like her, I swear to you... I give you candies... Hehe" Zeus - again - couldn't hide his horny. "No." A short and straight answer coming from Buddha, who looked unimpressed by Zeus atticts "I'm not helping you cheat on your wife." as he explained that, Zeus only rolled his eyes - remembering that he is married. "Aw,come on, Buddha, my great friend... It's not like I would steal your... Partner~ I just want to know what did you do...!" "...You have some serious problems, Zeus." With that said, Buddha just moved along his way... But Zeus question was enough to make him think about... That. How did this all happened?

You just looked straight at him and picked him up, saying "This is mine." and just straight up runned away from the gods. That was enough to make him be not only proud but happy - that reunion was a really shitty one.

"Hah... It seems like the puberty made her really strong." Remembering that day, Buddha couldn't hide his smile as he made his way towards you... He WILL use you as his pillow, after all, you can pick him up.

Ares

"Not that I don't respect you, Ares... But how did you... And her got together?" Asked Aphrodite with a rather... Amused expression, she seemed to be making fun of him. "How did you just do that? How did you manage that...? Did you finally follow your daddy ways?~ Because I don't see how you couldn't do that properly... You get no bitches at all~" "She isn't a bitch or anything like what dad do with Hera! She is different, I love her... I want her, she is the only one I truly love." He said, with a confused expression. "Oh love? Now you feel that... How patheti-" She is interrupted when you just walked straight to her, looking to her eyes with a hateful rage. "What did you just say to MY partner? Do you have a fucking problem with him?" As you started to swear at Aphrodite... Ares looked at you with a little smile on the face... Finally... He finally has someone who sides with him and stands up for him...

[tomorrowusa]

Sadly, a majority of Americans are almost completely ignorant about Eastern Europe. They probably don't know the difference between Budapest and Bucharest. (Spoiler: They are capitals of two non-Slavic countries in the region)

When Russia illegally annexed Crimea in 2014, Americans were surveyed on the location of Ukraine on an unlabeled map. Just 16% got it right. This map shows one dot for each response.

Yes, a couple of people thought Ukraine was in Memphis. Not sure what's up with those many folks who thought it is in Greenland. Maybe that's why Trump tried to buy it from Denmark.

In history in US classrooms almost nothing is mentioned about Eastern Europe that happened before the 20th century. This short list of items is typical.

A few (usually exotic) personalities like Ivan the Terrible, Vlad the Impaler, and Peter the Great.

Copernicus (real name: Mikołaj Kopernik) sorting out the Solar System. And that is actually more science than history.

The Siege of Vienna (1683). Vienna is not exactly in Eastern Europe but the siege was lifted by Polish King Jan III Sobieski.

A passing reference to Tsar Aleksandr II freeing the serfs – but only because it happened within two years of the Emancipation Proclamation.

So if you know almost nothing about the location and history of a country, you certainly won't understand its importance to international peace and security.

And that's the case with Ukraine which Putin sees simply as a piece in his country collection in his effort to restore the decrepit Soviet Union in all but name.

As Brendan Simms writes in his linked article up top...

It is worth reminding ourselves what is at stake. If Putin is not defeated and forced to withdraw from Ukraine, this will endanger much more than just the viability of that country. It will enable the Russians to reconstitute their forces facing the Baltic states and Finland, constituting a threat that we will have to face without support from Kyiv. The Ukrainians are thus fighting not only for their own sovereignty but our security as well. Their army is one of the best guarantors we have against future Russian aggression. All they ask is our help. We should give them what they need.

About those so called "red lines" we hear about from tankies and Trumpsters – those lines apparently don't really exist.

Robyn Dixon and Catherine Belton at the Washington Post write:

Ukraine’s resistance to Russia’s invasion keeps crossing President Vladimir Putin’s red lines. Kyiv’s lightning incursion into Kursk in western Russia this month slashed through the reddest line of all — a direct ground assault on Russia — yet Putin’s response has so far been strikingly passive and muted, in sharp contrast to his rhetoric earlier in the war. On day one of the invasion in February 2022, Putin warned that any country that stood in Russia’s way would face consequences “such as you have never seen in your entire history,” a threat that seemed directed at countries that might arm Ukraine. If Russia’s territorial integrity were threatened, “we will certainly use all the means at our disposal to protect Russia and our people. It’s not a bluff,” he said a few months later in September. “The citizens of Russia can be sure that the territorial integrity of our Motherland, our independence and freedom will be ensured — I emphasize this again — with all the means at our disposal,” making a clear reference to Russia’s nuclear weapons.

In other words, Putin has been bullshitting.

Ukraine’s Kursk incursion “proved the Russians are bluffing,” said Oleksandr Danylyuk, a former Ukrainian intelligence and defense official, now an associate fellow with the Royal United Services Institute, a think tank in London. “It shuts down all of the voices of the pseudo experts … the anti-escalation guys.”

Vladimir Putin can bluff only so much before people see that he's full of shit.💩 We're already past that point. His imperialist fantasies make him think that he's back in the Soviet Union and all he has to do is say something bellicose to get whatever he wants.

There are now Ukrainian troops on Russia's soil and over 133,000 refugees fanning out from the area telling other Russians of what's really going on near the border without censorship from Russian state media. The weaker Putin looks inside Russia, the sooner his invasion will end.

As I've said before, give Ukraine whatever weapons it wants – except nukes. Ukraine is doing NATO an enormous favor by keeping Putin at bay.

[good-vs-evo]

okay i understand the reason why ppl put ivantill and shiguang in the same box (doomed black and white yaoi) but oh my godddd the parallels between shiguang and mizisua make me so genuinely insane and i don't see. anyone talking about it in fact. if you have i'm sorry but i need to do this for my sanity

LOTS OF SPOILERS FOR BOTH LINK CLICK AND ALNST UTC! <3

starting with the fact that i don't think their personalities align perfectly or anything but just the way their relationships operate are Pretty Damn Similar

your ignorance is my bliss

let's start with mizisua for this one!

it's abundantly clear from the fact that mizi was actively looking forward to singing with sua on the stage that she had no idea what had to happen. she was a sheltered kid from the start and she had this innocence and naivety about her that, in my opinion, is part of the reason why sua was attracted to her. mizi essentially represented all of the happiness that everyone else could have if they weren't burdened by the knowledge and the fear of their looming deaths. and sua wanted her to stay that way, she wanted mizi to take a simple kind of joy in just being able to sing with the person she loved the most. because she thought that was right.

the thing that's the worst about this is that she made this decision on her own. she never let mizi decide if she wanted this knowledge, and just as ivan said, it ended up being a burden to mizi.

and now, for shiguang :>

when lu guang decides that he's going to dive back in time to save cheng xiaoshi, he also makes the decision to never let cxs know. his mantra is to never change the timeline, and he sticks to these morals throughout it all, never giving cxs so much as an inkling of what he'd done. to him, none of it mattered without cxs. he refused lose the one he cared most about without a fight, so he fought and fought and hid it all from cxs. second only to saving cxs himself, lg's most important mission was to make sure that cxs never ever found out the true nature of what he did. because the knowledge would kill him, knowing that cxs's life was the direct cause of someone else's life would kill cxs, and lg wanted to protect him from that.

insert quote about how lu guang liked cheng xiaoshi's naive nature. head in hands. goodnight.

2. my god, my universe

i guess this one is more of a minor thing on the part of shiguang, so let's start with them lol

technically speaking, there's no confirmation of what lg's true true thoughts about what cxs meant to him, but there is that one line from the live action opening that's "i don't wanna lose my world". combine that with, you know. All Of Lu Guang's Actions. and you can take a stab at the fact that cxs meant the world to him.

and of course the famous mizisua line(s).

i mean idk what to tell you. repeatedly throughout canon, they refer to each other as soulmates, each others' universes, their gods, saviors, etc etc the list stretches for the eternity that they could've spent together but they were robbed from. thanks. i don't need to say more AHDSHFJSF

3. the meaning of death

this one's obvious i supposed but let's talk about it anyways! first, mizisua

sua's death drives mizi forward. it changes all of her actions in the future, from her lashing out at luka to her full-on rebellion against the aliens, it's all because of sua. she doesn't have the power to bring sua back, so she does everything she can possibly do to make sure nobody ever loses anyone the way she lost sua. in her memory, in a way, for her.

and now shiguang

i mean the entire premise of the end of link click was that cxs's death drives lg's every action. he, unlike mizi, has the power to go back and fix the things that went wrong, so that's exactly what he does! and when he manages to save cxs, he intends to do everything in his power to keep him

i thought i had a lot more to say about this but i guess that's it? most of my thoughts were related to that first part. and the fact that they Liked Each Other HSUHFHSDF (i love ivantill i pinkie promise)

aaaanyways this was so dumb but i'm going to post it because i'm not a quitter and it'll be more embarrassing if i spent this much time writing this out only for it to rot in my drafts so BAM hope you enjoyed this!

[puppysirie0-0]

"Will You Take My Hand, Dear?"

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova x Lantsov!Reader

Warnings: Mostly fluff that alludes to smut that'll be in the next chapter with a dollop of angst

Chapter 2 of "The Bunny and Its Shadow"

You take Aleksander's hand as he leads you into the hall, belongings in hand. You watch in disbelief as you pass by all the bodies on the floor, unsure if they're dead or just knocked out. Either way, you can't bring yourself to wrap your head around the idea of Aleksander doing something like this. Risking everything that he's fought, scraped, and crawled for, to make sure he could be safe, to make sure his Grisha were safe.

You feel guilty. Why would he take that chance? The chance of everything falling apart, for someone he knew for such a short time. He had lived countless lives, worn various names, but what you hadn't known is that he hadn't loved anyone in those lives. At least not since her. Not since Luda.

Of course Aleksander had told you about Luda. The same night he talked of his past, he gave you his explanation, told you his reasoning for each individual cautious step he took to get here. Told you every ounce of pain that shot through his heart, as the king's guard shot through her's.

What you don't understand is why he would jeopardize all of his progress, possibly even risk war, for someone he's known for a mere 3 years compared to his comparably much, much longer life. You had talked about your insecurity of the time you had spent together and what it meant to him. How you felt that when you inevitably began to grow older, you would longer have any appeal. That he would cast you aside for a younger, prettier girl.

Or maybe he would think you were too much work. Your constant need for affection and clingy nature, he might some day find annoying. That you're broken to an extent that he didn't want to put the effort into. That you would be left heartbroken and alone, like you had been a majority of your childhood.

He promised every single time that he would never do such a thing, that he would find a way for you to live a longer life. But your insecurities and fears always found a way to shine through.

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

Before you could pull yourself from your haze of self-doubt and fear, Aleksander cut through it. He always found a way to get to you when you were upset. Whether it be drowning in your minefield of thoughts or simply upset about what happened in the real world. Your current events being evidence of the ladder.

He squeezed your hand in reassurance, somehow knowing that you're sinking into the quicksand of your mind. As you walk out, into the frigid weather Aleksander leans over to whisper to you, "Ivan, Fedyor, and some other Grisha are in the woods. I didn't want to risk anyone's lives but my own. I much prefer them helping from a distance granted our location."

As soon as you're in sight Fedyor smiles and waves at you. Ivan standing beside his husband, with his usual cold demeanor. Once you're in arm's reach though, Ivan is quick to wrap a kefta around your shoulders, asking you, "Are you okay?"

You're quick to ease his worry and wrap your arms around Fedyor. Always comforted by the pair ever since they figured out that you and Aleksander were more than just ‘kind acquaintances' . Fedyor reciprocates your hug, meeting your need for affection from him with a similar need of his own.

Aleksander patiently waits behind you as you greet the small group of Grisha that had accompanied him. Once you turn back to him he's already staring at you with eyes that you can only describe as absolutely lovestruck. As he admires you with a small smile, he tells you, "Let's get on the road, Milaya." Your cheeks slightly flushing as he used the pet name in front of anyone other than Genya, Ivan, or Fedyor.

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

You ride on Aleksander's horse on your way to your wedding venue. After multiple hours, you were out of Fjerda, everyone was exhausted, and the horses needed a much deserved break.

You set up camp for the night slinking into Aleksander and Your's shared tent. Although you're far from Fjerda, the weather was still quite chilly. As a result you were quick to snuggle under the blankets of your shared cot. It was a good few minutes before Aleksander arrived, coming to bed and pulling you close to him.

With your time away from each other, Aleksander couldn't stand another minute away from you. Every minute, every second, that ticked by where you weren't by his side made him antsy. He held you like you were the only thing precious to him in the world, because you were. You meant more to him than any title, he would risk anything and everything for you. He would scour any place, any country you could be in. He would burn the world down till it was ash if that's what he needed to do in order to find you.

When you tell him about your insecurities and how you feel like you aren't worth certain things, it hurts him. It hurts him emotionally and physically pains him. He has never loved anyone since Luda, that was until you. You had shone bright like a star in the night sky, a beam of light in the depths of his shadows.

He loved you with the entirety of his heart and soul. He would give you the world, make it kneel at your feet if that's what you wanted. You were everything to him, and he wished that his love for you was enough to prove that. That it scared him when he thought of you passing away. That he would lose his little star and be shrouded in darkness again, cold and alone.

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

When you awoke in the morning, Aleksander was gone, but you heard his muffled voice outside the tent. You sat there as you listened to the best of your ability, until Aleksander opened the tent to presumably lay back down with you. Obviously shocked by your consciousness, he asks you, "How'd you sleep?"

"Oh I don't know, I guess I kind of missed you," you teased back at him. He seemed to understand that you were joking and that you actually did miss him dearly. He leans over you and pecks your lips before he turns away from you as he talks, "We need to get back on the road soon, I only paid the officiant for today."

You shoot up before you start getting dressed, remembering today is your wedding.

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

You quickly get ready and are on the path to the venue, the venue Aleksander still won't tell you about. Around noon you arrived there, and by 4 you were getting married. You wore a lavender dress with embroidered sage green vines, one of the first gifts Aleksander had given you.

You felt pretty and Aleksander confirmed the fact. At the altar he stood in a kefta that you can only assume Genya made for him. It was his signature black kefta, with lavender embroidery instead of its usual black.

As you exchanged vows in front of your best friends and to the love of your life, you felt tears welling in your eyes. A few days before, you thought that you'd be meeting a different man at the altar, a stranger. But here you were in a small town in the middle of Ravka, marrying the man you never fathomed you'd be able to, during one of the most gorgeous sunsets you'd ever seen.

Aleks looked at you in question as he asked, "Will you take my hand, Dear? Will you let me drag you down into the shadows and depths to love with my entire being?" You could only answer him with a kiss, unable how to answer with words. As you kissed your husband it was filled with love and unsanctioned want. You opened your eyes to see Aleksander's eyes widen with amazement as he looked above your heads. You swiftly looked up to see stars intertwining with Aleksander's shadowy tendrils.

He looked down at you and said, "You-You're a Star Summoner. You're Grisha."

You looked around at your small group of Grisha, including Fedyor and Ivan who were staring at you with both shock and complete awe. They all fell to their knees as they looked at you, them all saying the same phrase, "Sankta Y/N"

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

Aleksander grabbed your wrist amplifying your new found powers, and pulled you over to where they had set up camp. He got tired of dragging you along, as he was much faster than you could keep up with, so he picked you up bridal style carrying you the rest of the way.

Once you were inside your shared tent, Aleksander set you down on your cot. Though he practically threw himself at you in a much less graceful and much more hungry, lust-filled manner. He leaned over you before he smashed his lips to yours, you meeting the kiss with equal vigor. He nipped and bit on your bottom lip before slipping his tongue into your mouth.

You didn't pull away until absolutely necessary. As you both pant, trying to catch your breath, you heard him whisper, "We can live together forever now."

Your heart swells with the admission, the fact that you were Grisha and you would never lose Aleks. That he would be by your side for as long as you both lived. You reply to him, "You're right my love, I'll never have to leave you now." You were too happy to recognize the anger you had towards your parents for hiding this, and also honestly you’re a little preoccupied.

Aleksander slowly starts kissing down your body with a tenderness you had not expected. He kisses every inch of your skin, and all your insecurities and worries melt away. You knew you loved him and he loved you, you knew this was going to be forever, even if nothing else was.

∾ ▩ °º❤️º°  ▩ ∾

A/N

Hey guys! This is the second chapter of Aleksander Morozova series, I'm writing this while collaborating with @lost-tothe-centuries! I had some pretty good response and engagement in the first chapter, so here you go! I hope you guys enjoy! Also, always remember that my DMs and requests are always open if you wanna talk. Love y'all! Mwah!

[nyrasbloodyclover]

a real fucking legacy (a. k. vornsky)

a/n: stop asking why because i REALLY DON'T KNOW. my fav book, my fav fictional man, i am literally an anna karenina bible

I entered the ballroom that glittered with golden lights from the crystal chandeliers. I felt dizzy from all the excitement that was following me throughout the whole day, making sure my posture was perfect, dress unwrinkled and smile bright, just as everybody expected.

It was my third year after I came out into society, and no matter how many balls I attended, each one of them held a special place in my almost empty heart. Especially the ones I went to in the last 3 months.

All because he looked at me. He danced with me. And then decided to sneak out and find a place where no one would see us. We spent hours together on some deserted balcony. He was a good man and as much as I wanted to, he wouldn't lay a finger on me let alone, touch me the way he was wasn't supposed to.

Count Vronsky had many qualities that made him different from other gentlemen I've met, but the one I loved the most was that he was an amazing storyteller. He's seen so much, he's been everywhere and as a girl who practically did nothing my whole youth I was a great listener. He painted landscapes to me with his words and even when he thought some things he said didn't make any sense, I understood it all.

As he was older and much more mature, I made myself remember the way he formed his sentences and try to use it while telling the story of us.

I wore a maroon dress, not wanting to stand out, though the patterns on it were granular.Black lace was covering the edges while the corset was tied enough to make my breathing almost painful. My hair was pinned up, making my scalp hurt, but I somehow got used to all of it.

I saw some of my friends not too far from me, but a tall figure appeared before I could approach them. A younger man. I knew him. His name was Ivan-something and my mother would be delighted if  I decided to marry him. I fake smiled at him as he asked me for a dance. He absolutely blended in with all the other men I knew. I had to say yes. They couldn't suspect me and Vronsky, It was never going to happen, so why make fool of myself?

I inhaled sharply as he took my gloved hand and led me to the center of the ballroom. I loved to dance, but with an awful partner, even life could be miserable. I felt despondent as he spun me around and stepped on my feet continuously. Music ringed in my ears.

Even if I adored this piece, I couldn't stand it at the moment. I looked around and I felt like my gown was blood-soaked. My lungs were bleeding. I needed air. I wanted to go away, far, far away. Everyone was either dancing or talking and smiling, having much better time than me. Everyone except one person. And that person was approaching us right now. His pace was fast and strong and confident, everything I wasn't right now. He looked resplendent. I was counting seconds and begging him silently to end this torment.

He heard and answered my prayers.

Ivan suddenly stopped and I couldn't be more grateful. I wanted to hug my savior and thank him properly, but the only thing I could do right now was smile and slightly nod. Enough for him to understand. Vronsky's eyes went over my figure. His expression was flat but he tried to act polite. 

Ivan and I separated and Vronsky took a chance to whisper something to him. I couldn't make out any of the words, but I could see Ivan't expression change immediately. He tried to act friendly but miserably failed and excused himself. I tried not to laugh at him and couldn't stop wondering what had Vronsky said to him to make him leave without any protest. Vronsky turned to me.

"Good evening," he smiled,  "It looked like he was bothering you?" Did we actually look that bad? I thought I put on a great performance. 

"I don't think it was that miserable. He only stepped on my shoes three times."

Vronsky let out a rich laugh that I adored and It reminded me how much I miss him. I wanted us to sneak out like before. And I wanted to listen to him talk. But most of all, I wanted to dance with him, and feel his touch even if it was minimal. It was the most I'm ever going to get from him.

I took a step closer and he noticed. I wanted him to read my mind and do the right thing. He looked hesitant. Too hesitant. I looked up at him through my lashes and he tilted his head backwards. Not too much, it was the smallest movement but I noticed. 

"I should g—" 

"Ask me to dance," I blurted out.

He practically whipped his head in my direction and I felt blood rushing into my cheeks. If he refuses I'll leave. I'll leave immediately. And die of embarrassment, while we're at that.

He looked like he was fighting with himself, trying to do what he wanted and what was expected of him. But what I said was painfully forward and I should be ashamed of that. And I would be if it was someone else. With him I felt completely different. A moment passed.

"Very well," he said as he reached for my hand.

I tried to hide my face from him because I swear it was the color of my gown. Scarlet — practically maroon.

He placed one hand on my hip as his other took mine and I forgot everything else. 

His touch burned on me as Vronsky held my gaze. His eyes were mesmerizing and I ached to be closer to him in any possible way. He led me through the ballroom as we moved to the rythm of the soft music that was not so irritating now.

His fingers traced the laces on my back, toying with them. I inhaled sharply and he smirked at me, but we didn't stop dancing. I felt like we were the only ones in the entire room—I couldn't see anything except him. And I wanted it to stay that way.

I was dazed for a couple of seconds before he let go of me and stepped away.

I felt empty and for some reason exposed without his body shielding me from the people in the room.

"I'll bring us something to drink." It was a simple offer and it made me realize how thirsty I actually was. I nodded and moved to the side, so I don't bother anyone. My face was burning. Because of him.

Vronsky appeared seconds later with two wine glasses. Smiling up at him, I reached for one glass but instead of taking it like a normal person I managed to spill it all over my dress. I wanted to cry but he didn't look like it bothered him that I was practically ruined now. I tried to not cause a scene but it was hard. That was my favorite dress.

Tears prickled my eyes, but he didn't let me roll in self pity. "Don't worry. We just need to go somewhere more...private and I'll fix this. But look, now the dress completely matches your face." And he left without letting me respond to his comment. I wanted to crawl in a hole and die, but instead I waited for him.

He came with napkins and took my hand looking awfully suspicious. But I wasn't sure why. 

He looked around and saw that nobody was paying attention to us, though that was unexpected. Alexei smiled like he won the biggest prize and quickly led us through the backdoor of the ballroom. The rest of the house was empty and I swear he could hear my rapid heartbeat along with pulsing in my ears.

I knew what he wanted and where he was going. I was glad I knew his mind so well that he became predictable to me. I knew his desires and dreams and I couldn't help but wish I was one of them.

His white uniform matched perfectly with my much darker dress. Though Alexei was perfectly put together, while I was...the opposite.

We entered some dark room I didn't recognize. It was large but almost empty. It looked like someone's personal gallery. There was a desk in the corner along with some bookshelves. He closed the door. Then locked it. 

My head immediately turned to him, "There is no reason to lock the door, Alexei," I smiled innocently. "We aren't doing anything wrong." 

A moment passed between us. I scanned the shelves and touched the hard spines with golden embroidery. I tried to act like a fool, but I knew.

"We are about to."

And that did it. It made me completely lose my self control as I was throwing away the last pieces of dignity I had tonight. He practically marched towards me and grabbed my neck as he gently placed his mouth on mine. He knew I had absolutely no experience with men, so he was going easy on me. For now.

My whole body was on fire while he almost unnoticeably squeezed my neck. I moaned into his mouth and Vronsky towered over me, leading me back with his body. I was going backwards until I hit the large shelves. 

"Stop me before it's too late," he gasped into my neck. It was intoxicating. Everything about him, about the way he moved to the way he touched me was addicting I wasn't sure I would be able to stop.

"I won't," was all I said, but it made him aware that I was willing to give myself to him completely.

"You said you will take care of my dress," I added, still playing innocent, even if what we were doing was far from that. 

"And I'm planning to do just that," he said as he turned me. I was now facing shelves, my back to him. It gave him complete access to my corset. Which he began to untie immediately. He was skilled with his hands, I realized just now. It made my stomach turn in very unfamiliar way. I didn't know what kind of influence he actually had on me, but I liked it. It made me careless and stupid, but I was in control my whole life. It was nice to give it to someone else now.

Corset was down and my whole body felt hypersensitive for whatever reason. I wanted him to do so many things but I didn't know how to ask or if I was supposed to anyway. So I let him play with me.

"Turn, dorogaya," he whispered from behind and I obeyed. The nickname made me want to grab him and kiss his whole face. Then he went down. "I'm going to make you see stars." 

That was the last thing he said before taking down my skirt and the rest of the undergarments until I was stripped bare in front of him. But I was surprised I wasn't the least bit ashamed. Somehow, this felt completely ordinary with him. I was scared to move. I didn't know what or how to do anything. 

He naturally noticed and smiled, but not in a mocking way. His smile was so sweet I melted. 

"Touch me wherever you want. And however you want. Don't be afraid." That gave me a bit of confidence, so I looked down at him, on his knees. The image before me made me feel things I didn't know I was capable of feeling. I ran my hand through his hair and he closed his eyes, while his eyelids fluttered. 

It seemed like I had the same effect on him. Then I did something that made me question myself. I led his head down, in between my legs and I saw him smirk, but he knew what to do. 

The first time I felt his tongue on me was the closest I'll be to setting myself on fire. I gripped his hair on instinct. 

His mouth was doing wonders to me. I felt every sensation of it through my entire body. My head fell on the shelves and I had to press down a moan. Was this supposed to be this intense? He stopped using his mouth and continued with fingers while continuously kissing my lower stomach.

Vronsky did everything with patience and commitment. I didn't know why I thought this would be any different. I made a noise that sounded painful, but only because he was moving so slowly and torturedmewith his fingers. He shot me a concerned look, "Should I stop?"

"No, no, nonono," I cried out. I felt hard pressure building in my lower stomach and I grew dizzy. He went faster but then stopped and my hips buckled, while I was fighting the urge to do something myself. "Please continue," I pleaded.

"How could I not when you beg me so pretty?" He cocked his head and continued working me much faster this time, but still gentle. He took his time with me, looking at my reactions to certain movements, the sounds I was trying not to make, my face expressions. He knew what he was doing and he did it so well that It actually made me see stars. I choked on a scream as I was trying to catch a breath. My knees buckled and I felt I was closer to the edge.

He switched to his mouth again and Alexei's tongue finished the job. He put my leg over his shoulder to get better access and that completely pushed me.

I finished on his mouth and seconds later went down with him. He held me as I was trying to even out my breathing. "Can we do it again?" I surprised myself by asking.

He smiled down at me, "When you become countess, yes."

[generational-atrophy]

Can I request Hetalia main 8 with an S/O who has bad periods that the nations don't understand.

Ivan probably would get stuck asking Ukraine about it and get mildly creeped out when she tells him about boob pain.

(Hetalia Main 8 X Reader) S/O with bad periods

(Gender Neutral) Headcanons ~ A/N JHFDGHJDKF YEAH but for ivan specifically i would argue he is actually pretty familiar with the struggles. Dear people who have periods i am so sorry. also i didnt do japan again sorry if u wer looking for him i wi. l do him seperately <3

Trigger Warning: None, just fluff!

Oh boy. You’re gonna have to be one teaching him about… everything related to periods. He’ll be like “What’s so bad? It’s just like a little scrape, isn’t it?” and by the end of the night he is Mortified by the process menstruating people have to go through. He is never going to downplay your pain again, don’t worry.

But he doesn’t know what to do to take care of you really… that’s his vice. He’ll just end up buying everything he can possibly think of to comfort you, and I mean… it’s something. It’ll dull the pain a little bit to eat an insane amount of chips while he plays with your hair all night.

If your legs go out or you need to go to the hospital during your time of the month, he is fully capable of carrying you wherever you need to go. Speeding laws be damned! When your entire body is trying to kill you from the inside out, you are the most important thing in the world to him.

For a long time, Arthur thought it was… unrefined to talk about things like periods. Of course, now he knows better, but that also means… he has no idea what’s going on down there. Or what it does to the body. So when you tell him about the back pain, the cravings, the light-headedness, the nausea… he is probably gonna be pretty doubting. Until you collapse or throw up on him.  Then he’ll take care of you, hand and foot.

Literally. He loves giving massages, and he’s weirdly good at it. Of course, he’ll get you some pain meds (the good pain meds, too) and snacks, but also his hands are not gonna leave your body until your time of the month is over. 

But until then, he is very concerned. Even if it’s the umpteenth time you’ve been with him through it, he’s still begging you to go to the doctor. Anytime anything does even slightly worse, he’s grabbing his keys, getting ready to speed you to the emergency room.

Francis may sympathize, but he really does not… understand the severity of the situation. When you moan about not getting out of bed, he’s just confused and a little annoyed. Sure, periods are painful, but… you’ve had so many, aren’t you used to it by now? 

Feel free to educate him. Or hit him. Both work.

After that, he’s not making you get out of bed. He may not know your pain, but he is sure as hell not gonna force you to do anything. If your job tries to get you to come in, he’ll even start a strike outside for you <3

And considering that you’re probably his first partner who gets that much pain from your time of the month, he has no idea what to get you. Get him a list, and make sure you tell him not to find healthier alternatives cause otherwise you’re getting gross chocolate that’s supposed to help with pain. He’s trying to help… he’s just weirdly terrible at this specific part.

Don’t worry! He’s had to come up with remedies for this exact problem since before the invention of the wheel! It won’t taste great, but he’ll have you back in shape in no t- wait, why isn’t it working?! What do you mean your boobs hurt more now?!

He’s… really concerned for you the whole time. It’s hard for him to leave your side, even if you insist you’re used to it. I mean, surely this many cold compresses should relieve your… unorthodox pains. Frankly, he’s impressed. How many years have you been going through this? And without him to wait on you, hand and foot?! A shame…

If you need anything, he’ll happily make it for you. Yes, make it. He wants to be sure your care is as perfect as possible, so he only trusts his own hands. But maybe be wary if your legs tend to give out… his old bones are not meant to be carrying anyone around for too long. But of course, he’ll still do his best for you.

The Braginsky family has been cursed for… well, ever… with terrible medical conditions, so he is very familiar with the suffering caused by periods. He’s heard Natalya wail and moan for hours on end, and he is not about to let you go through the same pain! He will rip the radiator out of the wall to use as a heating pad if he has to!

He doesn’t panic as much as the others would, he already knows what you need and had it at home. That means he is not leaving your side for even a second! If you suddenly get new pains, lose feeling in anything, or have any other emergency, he is fully prepared to sweep you off your feet and help you deal with it. And he’s had to do much grosser things than take care of someone he loves, don’t worry about that.

Like you could bleed on his leg and he would not even notice, much less be upset. He’s just like, “Oh, dear, are you running out of anything? I can pick anything up for you if you need.”

OH YOU POOR DARLING! Don’t worry, he already called into work for you! You need snacks? Heated blankets? Medication? Stuffed animals? For him to hold you in his arms? He’s there! No questions asked! (He has quite a low pain tolerance himself, so he is nothing but empathetic towards you during your time of need.)

If it’d make you feel better… he’d love to massage your stomach... Don’t look at him like that! He just wants to help!

Also, if he sees you trying to put on any tight and uncomfortable clothing, he is getting you out of that stuff asap. If you need to go anywhere, he’ll go for you! Don’t stuff yourself into such suddenly ill-fitting clothing… you still look beautiful to him. 

And if it gets too bad, you have the fastest (and most dangerous) driver in all of Italy to get you to the emergency room ASAP. So don’t worry your pretty little head, Feli’s got you!

Just because Ludwig knows all about the medical side of periods, does not mean he knows how to actually deal with you when you’re in horrible, horrible pain. The fact that although it may make you feel better, you are not up for doing anything, is just baffling to him. He may try to drag you out of bed to stretch and exercise. Please bite him when he does so.

Once you start describing your actual symptoms, he starts getting light-headed. No way… this happens every month? Incalculable back pain on top of your uterus exploding? You sure you don’t need a doctor? It’s really no hassle to carry you to the car, promise! But also, you could just take him up on that offer and change your mind and ask for ice cream. He would do it. Just saying.

Anything to relieve your suffering, really. He’s spending all his time worrying about you, so he’ll get anything you want without question. He can’t stand seeing you in so much pain… but he also can’t help but feel so blessed to have been born biologically male. Basically, you’ve got a servant whose in love with you for a week.

[komotionlessqueenmm]

I've practically been stalking your old ivan drago content and saw your imagine prompt for being Rocky's younger sister and having a crush on Ivan, can you IMAGINE the idea of you, being Rocky's younger sister, seeking ivan out after his life changing loss because you know what that means for him? Just being soft and understanding because even though your brother won (and there's a good reason as to why that's the appropriate ending cough cough) you feel the need to offer a shoulder and comfort ivan because you see him for what he is, the product of having to please such a demanding regime? Maybe it's just my penchant to see big strong antagonists and want to hold their face in my hands lol (like iceman, my beloved)

Gah dammit now I wanna write about this!!!!

(No seriously tho I love this, I have daydreamed about it so many times, just needed someone to convince me to write about it! But I'm doing this as a headcanon instead of an actual story because I don't think I can properly get across what I want to get across. Which is why I never wrote about this despite fantasizing about it.)

Headcanon/Preference # 28

Pictures NOT mine.

Year posted - 2023

*I'm randomly coming back to this request because I saw it in my drafts, and I'm dabbling with a few pieces with Dolphs characters again, so I wanted to finish this one. That being said, I've actually got a story I'm working on based loosely on that imagine, it's got a fun little twist to it though. So keep an eye out for that, and I apologize this took so long, but that's honestly kinda just how I roll. 😅 ALSO this isn't exactly what you asked for, but I think you'll enjoy it regardless! MY BAD!

☓Before the fight☓

☭ So before the fight you'd only seen Ivan on the TV screen. But even then you could see him for who he really was. And apparently you were the only one who could, so you kept your thoughts to yourself.

☭ You more or less threatened your brother to take you with him to Russia. And he of course tried reasoning with you, but you'd made up your mind, and he wasn't going to change it.

☭ Rocky was of course worried that the cold might get to you, so he made sure you were bundled to the nine every single day. It was sweet, but a little annoying at the same time. And you had to admit the cold was definitely harsher in Russia than Philadelphia, and that was saying something.

☭ But despite the cold, and the harsh glare from the locals, you found yourself enjoying the landscape scenery.

☭ You helped to encourage your brothers training, and despite having lost your old friend Apollo to him, you couldn't help but find yourself enamored in a way with the Soviet boxer. A fact that you kept under lock and key.

☭ You wondered most nights what would happen in the end. What would happen to Rocky if he lost? What would Ivan go through if he lost? There was just so much at stake, and you couldn't decide who you wanted to come out victorious. Well both of them if you had it your way, but you knew that wasn't an opinion.

☭ You often replayed the fight he had with Apollo in your head. You'd seen how Apollo's theatrics effected him, and how unbothered he'd been by Apollo's taunting. How precious he was, and how powerful.

☭ It made you worry for your brother, but you knew he was one tough son of a bitch. You'd been there for every single one of Rocky's fights after all, even back when he was fighting in shitty clubs.

☓During the fight☓

☭ You were sorta like Rocky's coach at this point, well maybe not coach but rather his hype-man, always had been. So you were with him when he went out to the ring, and beside him in the ring.

☭ You had to admit, seeing Ivan up close for the first time... Jesus he was huge... And very intimidating with his cold expression. Queue your curiosity and worry both spiking.

☭ You shook hands with his team, per the typical routine, and when you were about to turn and leave the ring. You found Ivan staring at you, making eye contact, and maintaining it for far longer than you probably should have.

☭ Rocky noticed your hesitance, and gently bumped his shoulder with yours, knocking you out of your stupor. You offered your older brother a small smile, and he gently bumped your chin with his glove, drawing a proper smile from you. Which in turn made him smile.

☭ He didn't even notice Ivan had been staring at you, or that Ivan continued to do so as you left the ring. But the announcers? The fans? They noticed. So around the world people wondered if maybe it had been a bad idea letting you go to this fight.

☭ Before the fight started, you stood beside the ropes in Rocky's corner, and made good on tradition. Resting your foreheads together you said a prayer and wished him luck, smiling when he kissed the crown of your head before breaking away.

☭ All throughout the fight, you found yourself feeling rather queasy, you'd never experienced that before during any of Rocky's fights. You knew subconsciously because it wasn't just because of your worry for Rocky.

☭ You realized pretty quickly into the fight, that far more was riding on Ivan winning than Rocky. For Rocky if he lost, he would have been humiliated, and failed in avenging Apollo... But Ivan. You knew he would suffer far worse if he lost.

☭ You didn't have to speak Russian to know that his entire life would be determined by the outcome of this fight. If he won he'd be a hero, like Rocky was back home. But if he lost, odds are he'd loose everything he's come to know. How perceptive of you.

☭ Often you'd find yourself looking to Ivan when they were separated for a short break. Almost always finding him already staring at you, his expression dark and furious. Which admittedly made you a little nervous, but you didn't feel his frustration was directed at you.

☭ By the time they were both bloody and exhausted, you were on the brink of tears. And both men had noticed. Rocky trying to comfort you as best he could during his breaks, despite the fact that his state of mind was more important. (Something you kept reminding him about, but he didn't care. He's a good brother.)

☭ Ivan did nothing but watch, wondering if you were afraid for your brother, afraid for himself, or if perhaps you were afraid of him at this point? A series of thoughts that only confused him, and distracted him more than he'd care to admit.

☭ When Ivan picked that man up by his throat, you found that the tears had finally escaped, rolling down the apples of your cheeks as he shouted in Russian. His eyes found yours in the commotion, and he was certain he'd gotten his answer to his earlier ponderings.

☭ Little did he know you were crying for him, not because of his actions.

☓After the fight☓

☭ The crowd had boomed with excitement, and many people rushed the ring to celebrate with Rocky. You had watched as Ivan was led out by his team, and you didn't think twice about following them.

☭ When his team realized you'd followed them, they tried to shoo you away, but then Ivan noticed it was you, and barked at them to leave in his native tongue. Perplexed they complied and left you alone in the locker room.

☭ "What are you doing here?" He questioned, his accent think and heavy, like honey to your ears. "I..." You were at a loss for words. "I'm not sure... I-." He scoffed at you before turning away, looking at himself in the mirror, and glancing at you through it.

☭ "I guess I just wanted to see how you were... If you're... If you're okay." You tried to make sense of the way you felt, you knew you were drawn to him, you just didn't know why. He simply kept watching you through the mirror as you fumbled adorably over your explanation.

☭ But what you said next really caught him by surprise. "Your hands... Are your hands okay?" You'd asked, now looking at him through the mirror, he turned to you with confusion evident on his expression. No one ever asked if his hands were okay after a fight before, not even his wife.

☭ "I'm usually the one that mends Rocky's hands after a fight... Are your... Are your hands okay?" You explained yourself, taking a tentative step towards him, freezing in place when he stepped towards you.

☭ "You are afraid of me." He stated. "Not exactly." You quickly defended yourself. "I'm not afraid of you... I'm anxious around you." You added, thinking he'd accept that response. "What is the difference?" Ivan argued, watching you approach him.

☭ "My heart is racing, but it isn't because of fear." You tried to explain, feeling incredibly sheepish, especially considering you knew he was married. "I know fear... And you do not inflect fear in me." You added, sort of hoping he wouldn't understand what you meant.

☭ Thankfully he did. "I feel it as well." He admitted in a soft tone, not wanting to startle you as you gently unwrapped his wrist wraps. He noticed how you flushed at his confession, it made him smile softly.

☭ You tended to his busted up hands with a gentle touch, more gentle than he's used to. And by the time you'd finished, he couldn't help himself and he kissed you.

☭ It was tender the way he tilted your head back with his index finger, slowly leaning in to give you the opportunity to turn away if you wanted, but you didn't turn away.

☭ It's probably the most wholesome moment of his life, and yes I'm taking into account the birth of his son Viktor.

☭ You were just so sweet, peering up at him with big doe eyes. Foreheads resting together you both forgot about the world around you, if only for a moment.

☭ Ivan just wanted to wrap you in his arms and stay that way forever. He wasn't sure why he was so drawn to you, but he had been enamored with you long before you even knew about him.

☭ Granted you had just been a face on the screen of his TV, but that didn't stop his heart from fluttering at the mere sight of you. Perhaps it was fate, perhaps you were made for eachother, separated from eachother across the world.

☭ After what felt like hours the moment was ruined, because down the hall you could hear Rocky calling your name, probably worried sick about where you'd disappeared to.

☭ "I have to go." You whispered, despite not wanting to. "I know." Ivan murmured equally saddened. "Until we meet again." He added before giving you one last kiss, breaking away and leaving right before Rocky barged in. His heart shattering in his chest, as he knew you'd probably never see eachother again.

☭ "There you are!" Rocky breathed a sigh of relief, and practically fell into your arms. He never questioned why you were in Ivan's locker room, and he never questioned why you'd run off like that. (He had a feeling he didn't want to know.)

☓Years later☓

◈ You hadn't seen him since his fight against Rocky. And you wondered if he'd even recognize you anymore. Or if you'd even see him that is.

◈ You knew about his son, and his determination to fight Adonis Creed.

◈ What you hadn't honestly expected, was for him to show up your brother's restaurant, atleast not unannounced.

◈ "Rocky we need-" You cut yourself off as you laid eyes on him, he looked even more handsome than you'd remembered. Frozen in place you jumped when Rocky touched your arm.

◈ "You okay?" He asked with a soft expression, wordlessly pulling you into a hug when you nodded your head yes.

◈ "(Y/n)." Ivan had approached you both, and you could tell Rocky didn't trust him. "Hello Ivan." You smiled softly, those old butterflies from before fluttering around in your belly.

◈ You'd secretly been sending letters to Ivan for years, and while you sent them religiously, you only ever received a handful in return. Not that you minded, you understood, better than anyone.

◈ "Still so beautiful." He mused as if Rocky wasn't standing right there, his hand coming up to brush his knuckles across your cheek bone. Rocky was quick to put himself between you and Ivan of course, ever the protective brother.

◈ "Rock." You placed your arm on his bicep, gently tugging at his arm, a reassuring smile on your face when he turned to look at you. "It's okay." You reached up cupping your brothers cheek, smiling as you felt him relax under your touch.

◈ When you looked to Ivan again, you asked him if he would like to take a small walk. Rocky immediately tried arguing against it, but you assured him you would be fine, and he listened to you begrudgingly.

◈ "You look good Ivan." You'd mused as you walked side by side, just the two of you, as he'd made Viktor wait in the car. "I've missed you." He admitted, making you smile. "And I've missed you." You found it funny that he could still make you blush.

◈ "I kept all of your letters." He added in a soft tone, again making you smile. "Yeah?" You stopped walking and he turned to you, taking your hands in his. "Of course." He smiled.

◈ "You were always on my mind." Ivan murmured quietly before wrapping his arms around your waist, burying his head into your neck. You quickly wrapped your arms around his large shoulders, your right hand coming to rest against the back of his head.

◈ "You know... I never married." You mused thoughtfully, hoping he wouldn't think you crazy. "I couldn't bring myself to love anyone else." You added when he pulled back from the hug.

◈ "I would have given anything to have you by my side, helping me raise Viktor." Ivan closed his eyes for a moment, thinking back on his fantasy. "Want about now?" You wondered aloud before you could stop yourself, and Ivan smirked.

◈ "You would want that? Want me?" He asked with a small smile, adoration shining in his eyes. You cupped his face between your hands, pulling him down to your height so you shared the same air. "It's all I've ever wanted Ivan." He visibility melted into your touch.

◈ Needless to say the world was shocked to see you by Ivan's side, and even more so when you announced your engagement. Rocky tried to "reason" with you, claiming it was a rash decision. But you told him about everything, the moment you shared with Ivan in Russia, the letters, and the way he made you feel, the way he'd always made you feel.

◈ Rocky came to realize your love for Ivan, was like his love for Adrian. He knew you never really dated, or let yourself get attached, especially after his fight with Ivan. And despite his past with the Russian, he supported you (warning Ivan about what would happen if he broke your heart like any good brother would.), and he attended your wedding of course.

[atrophiedemotion]

hey Cast! uh so this ask is about. alien stage. but imma send you another about some random shit because why not. anyways

the tags that you had on that previous post with me and plip (the one about ivan and till and how they show honesty differently and how we know about their characters a different amount because of how forthcoming or not they are) and my question for you is, how many of Ivan's actions do you think are representative of his true emotions? I don't think his body language, in general, is very forthcoming but I do agree that his actions can be pretty revealing (he strikes me as an acts of service person especially with trying to escape with Till) but uh yeah I'm wondering if there are any specific examples that you think of as being revealing of his actual thoughts or specific examples of him pretending to be someone else?

thanks for listening to me yap uh I hope you're doing well and that you have an awesome day!

rock... oh boy... this is gonna be a long one. wonderful question. thank you for the ask, i hope you have a great day as well!!

so, i didn't fully explain in the tags because i didn't want to write a full length essay on plip's post (ty plip for dealing w the rambling)(i was also very tired so i wasn't fully articulate lmao) but i meant that ivan shows his emotions through the outcomes/projected outcomes of his actions. he certainly isn't very forthcoming in the way he acts and portrays himself, but there is undeniable truth in the intent and meaning behind everything he does, even things that seem counterproductive.

i think that since ivan genuinely cannot fully be upfront and honest (due to trauma, his lack of self worth, and his decided survival strategy) his main truths show in the deeper meaning of the things he does for other people and himself. with ivan, it is all about intent. i've said before that the only way to understand ivan is to dig deeper and this is very much true here. he uses a lot of subterfuge to throw people off from his actual intentions, but they're there.

ivan often uses unconventional, roundabout ways to achieve his goals/get what he wants- especially when they mean something to him. he is a guy who is caked in layers upon layers of meaning only if you pull back the acres of curtains he's covered them with. he doesn't want people to know what goes on in his head, so he covers it up valiantly. this is due to his low self esteem of course, but also full on survival. in order for his plans to work, no one can be in on it. no one can know what he's thinking. all of his true feelings and thoughts need to be hidden in order to achieve success, but in the end it's fucking hard to not leave a trace of your true feelings.

with all that being said, examples!

the biggest and most obvious examples are mainly related to till (of course they are) and i also feel like they're the most telling. ivan's teachers specifically pointed out that he was only childish around till (they were relieved by it, too, because he was so damn serious the rest of the time and didn't behave like a child should). ivan has the hardest time hiding his true emotions around till, which makes sense, because till makes him feel the most emotion when his are always dulled. that doesn't stop him from going the 'i must hide my crush by pulling his pigtails' route but, y'know.

since most of these are talked about frequently and i dont want to keep beating a dead horse in an already long post, here's a (hopefully) brief list:

-the biggest one, the meteor shower. going through all of that to escape with till, specifically during a meteor shower that it seemed ivan was desperate to show till (to introduce his shooting stars to each other or smth im sure). ivan offered till freedom and denied himself of it when till turned around and he followed him back without question.

-his good behavior can arguably be considered to be due, in part, to the perks an obedient pet gets. this isn't just a till thing but ivan's obedience is very telling of his need and drive for survival, which considering his uhh,, track record is likely largely so he can protect till. gaining perks and learning insider information, like how to take collars off and gain access to isolation cells, assist him in assisting and caring for till.

-the sometimes silent companionship they share. the way ivan will poke at him to get his outright attention but is still at times satisfied with just existing in till's space and enjoying his presence says a lot about his genuine adoration and admiration of till

-his sacrifice. i don't think i need to say much about this as it's pretty self explanatory lmao but it is a Great example of what im trying to convey. ivan does honest things and has to cover them up at the same time. the 'violence' was to end the round of course, but it was also kind of like a familiar bandaid over the painfully honest feelings he conveyed with the kiss. even if he didn't really hurt him he couldn't just be honest

there are definitely more (most everything he does in regards to till tbh) but i wanted to talk about some others too

the comic conversation with sua about her sacrifice! such a big one. ivan's feelings about sua are very complicated, but to me i feel like he cares about her to an extent, almost pitying in a way. he's horribly jealous of her and the love she has, but he sees so much of himself in her that what he says in that conversation is probably at least half projection, even if he's not aware of it.

the way he looks at her without trying to hide his distaste feels like the way he would look down on himself. the whole thing shows not only his disgust with himself, but his anger towards someone who is so similar to him that she makes the same plans in her head even though she has something he believes he'll never have. it's envy, tried and true, and he doesn't even hide it at the time. he hides the self loathing behind it, but still. that might be the most honest we've seen ivan aside from the end of r6.

that conversation also does kind of show the fact that he cares for sua and mizi. sua in a way he acknowledges less to himself, but certainly mizi.

and speaking of mizi, my last example for right now is the way he watched round 5 like he was barely holding it together and sort of did his own recreation of it in round 6. the strangling was reminiscent of the way mizi lunged at luka and he almost certainly got the idea for his method of sacrifice from what she did. it kind of feels like an ode to her, in a way. an ode to mizi while offering himself up for till, which. is very sad but almost a little sweet, that he had a piece of mizi in what he was doing for till.

okay okay im sure i could keep talking about this but ive been writing for. a long time LMAO so i will stop here but! yeah. ivan shows his emotions inadvertently through his actions and about fifty levels of subterfuge. but it's all we get, so...

thank you for the ask again my dude, i really enjoyed answering it!

[rose-sophia-isabella-rogers]

A Steel That Went Through Hottest Fire: Chapter XVII - Moving Heaven and Earth

Chapter Summary: You fulfill your promise to Nikolai and complete an antidote to jurda parem in Lazlayon. But it gets an unwanted attention from your enemies. To protect you and the recipe, you head back to Os Alta. But someone is already waiting there for you.

Pairing: Aleksander Kirigan/Reader, Nikolai Lantsov/Zoya Nazyalensky, Ivan/Fedyor Kaminsky

Characters: Aleksander Kirigan, Reader, Zoya Nazyalensky, Nikolai Lantsov, Yuri Vedenen, Fedyor Kaminsky, Ivan, Genya Safin, David Kostyk, Tolya Yul-Bataar, Isaak Andreyev, Tamar Kir-Bataar, the Apparat

Word Count: 3818

A/N: Inspired by prompt: https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389090591501/

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@budugu

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

@marrymonrich

@wonderland2425

@chelseyyouraverageluigi

@thehufflepuffavenger1

@drinix

You're back in Lazlayon, where you work furiously on the antidote. Aleksander has, of course, insisted on coming with you. He'll not be parted from you ever again. Ever. There are, however, some conditions about his presence there.

While Nikolai has agreed to give Kirigan the position he wants, he and his friends have concluded it's better to keep him hidden and under observation. They want to prepare the people for his return first. The Darkling is not happy about it, but he concedes. For now. He knows, after all, they're going to need him sooner than they think. And hope.

One day, the first sample of the antidote is finally ready. All that you need is to test it on someone. Just then, Nina arrives in Lazlayon along with her companions and some women Grisha that are under the effect of jurda parem.

You go outside to tell Nikolai about what you think is a success. You were told he's there. You stop, seeing him talking to Nina and two other Grisha you don't know. There's also a Fjerdan with them for some reason. Not bound. So maybe an ally? You don't care about that at the moment. You care about a huddled group of women that look terrible.

'Are they under the effect of jurda parem?' you ask, letting others know about your presence. Nikolai, Nina and the three people look at you.

'Yes,' Nina confirms grimly. 'How's your work on the antidote going?'

Instead of answering her, you march toward the women. There was a time where you would hesitate. But you're another person now. So, you tap one woman. She looks at you with suspicion.

'Pardon me,' you say, reaching into a small box in your hand. 'Say "ah".'

'Huh?' she asks, confused. The moment her mouth opens, you quickly put your fingers in it. Her eyes go wide. You take your fingers out.

'Swallow, please,' you say. She doesn't want to, but has no choice. Her body suddenly starts shaking and she gasps.

'What did you do?!' Nina demands, rushing to the poor woman. You feel someone grabbing you and pulling you away.

'Helped her,' you answer calmly. A moment passes and something changes in the woman's appearance. No one can tell exactly what it is, but she looks healthier. She looks at you with surprise.

'I… I don't feel it,' she says, stunned. 'The need to… take it.'

'You should also lose your enhanced abilities,' you explain. 'But we should wait before testing it. Sorry for giving this to you in such a way.'

She shakes her head, understanding. You turn to Nikolai. He's stunned as well. He looks at you hopefully.

'We should keep her under observation to see if there are any side effects,' you tell him.

'You can make more in the meantime,' Nina suggests.

'If you get me jurda, then sure,' you say. 'And I'm going to need a lot of it. More of it goes into an antidote that into the drug.'

'It's going to be a problem, then,' Nikolai sighs. 'Since I made a deal with Kerch, that is going on a war with Novyi Zem, which has the most of it.'

'Just bring me some of it,' you say. 'It'll be enough.'

'You just said the opposite,' the Fjerdan, confused, says. You look at him curiously.

'And you are…?' you ask.

'Matthias Helvar,' the man introduces himself.

'He's with me,' Nina quickly says. You shrug and smile.

'Get me as much jurda as you can and I'll get us even more,' you say mysteriously and go back to your workshop.

A few days later a crate of raw jurda is brought to you. Your eyes light up at the sight. You quickly order to have it taken outside. There, Zoya and David watch as you take the seeds of jurda and plant it.

'It will take time before it will grow,' Nazyalensky points out. 'Anyway, I don't think it has proper conditions for it.'

'You forget about something,' you say and touch your neck. Your friends frown. You simply press your hands to the ground and concentrate. A moment later the plant grows rapidly until it's blooming. You tell someone to gather what you need and you plant the seeds. You repeat the process over and over again.

'That is… a bit terrifying,' David says, stunned. 'And she doesn't look tired at all.'

'But she will get us what we need,' Zoya says. 'Gather whoever is available. They will plant the seeds. So she could focus only on growing them.'

Kostyk quickly hurries away. Nazyalensky looks at you. You're lifting your hands off the ground, as you've just bloomed the next portion of flowers.

'Impressive,' your friend says. You smile at her. Your eyes land on the building.

'Where's Aleksander?' you ask.

'At the meeting with Nikolai,' Zoya answers. 'As always, these days. I have to admit, he has a point in some matters. And good ideas.'

'And when he'll be able to stop hiding?' you ask.

'As soon as we locate the Apparat,' Nazyalensky answers grimly. 'The rat can make a riot because of the Darkling's resurrection and us working with him.'

You hum and return to growing more jurda for the antidote. Zoya observes you for a moment longer. When David returns with others, she turns and walks inside the building to let Nikolai know about the process. When she does that, she can see Kirigan smiling with pride in his eyes. It annoys her. Because with every day she starts to see your point more. That they need both you and the Darkling to save Grisha and win the war. And she hates it.

*

Some time later, you're working on another portion of the antidote, when suddenly there's a loud explosion. Then you hear screams, shouts and sound of running. You look with confusion at David.

'That wasn't us,' you say. 'So… who blew something up? And more importantly, why they didn't invite us do help them?'

'Let's better check,' Kostyk says. Every Durast and Alkemi that are in workshops hurry up. The source of the commotion is outside, so you rush there. You stop on top of the stairs, stunned. You're under attack.

'What in the names of Saints?' David asks, stunned. You see a small army fighting with your Grisha. Khergud attacking from above.

'Shu-Han,' you say. 'How did they find this place?'

'It doesn't matter now,' Nikolai says, hurrying past you. 'For now, we need to stop them from getting inside.'

But then you see more of them showing up. The King curses.

'We don't have enough men,' David says, showing up. 'Most of our soldiers are in the Grand Palace or looking for Grisha affected by jurda parem. Because it was supposed to be a secret lab!'

'I know!' Lantsov scoffs. 'I have no idea how they found us.'

He looks at the battle, gnawing at his lip. His face becomes grim. He looks at you and you already know whatever he's about to say, he's not happy about it.

'We need Kirigan,' he declares, causing Kostyk to sharply inhale. 'Only he has enough power to stop it. Zoya is away. And maybe, if we're lucky, his sudden appearance will scare them enough.'

'Are you sure this is a good idea?' David asks nervously. 'People are not ready for it. We aren't ready.'

'We have no choice,' Nikolai says grimly and looks at you. 'Go and get him. Tell Tolya it's time to get out of the shadows.'

You nod once and sprint back inside. You suspect what you're to say to the Heartrender is some password. So Tolya would know that these are really the King orders and not you trying to deceive him. You applaud to their smartness and speed up.

In his chambers, Aleksander argues with Tolya. He wants to go outside and help. The Heartrender is against it, obviously.

'You can hear very well it doesn't sound like we're winning,' the Darkling growls, losing patience. 'We're losing. I can change that.'

'You know very well you can't show up yet,' Tolya says, irritated.

'If things continue going the way they are, there will be no people to show up to,' Kirigan barks.

'And why do you care about that so much?' Yul-Bataar asks, crossing his arms.

'Contrary to your belief, I care about Grisha,' Aleksander says, clenching his fists. 'Besides… why do you think they are here? At that time?'

Tolya frowns. Kirigan scoffs.

'We finally have an antidote to jurda parem,' he explains. 'We can finally deal with the innocent Grisha they and Fjerda sends at us that are under the influence of it.'

'They're here for it,' the Heartrender says, going pale.

'And for the person that knows how to create it,' the Darkling adds. Yul-Bataar stares at him.

'So, it's about the girl,' he says and scoffs. 'Not about Grisha, but the only person who wants to be by your side from their own free will.'

'Both reasons are why I want to get out of here,' Aleksander says through gritted teeth. 'We need-'

He's interrupted by a loud explosion. It must be close, because the ground shakes and they have to hold on to things so not to fall. They look at each other. Before Tolya can react, Kirigan bolts out of the room. The Heartrender scoffs and hurries after him.

They're forced to stop at some point because of rumbles on the ground. There's a hole in the wall and another one in the ceiling. But what causes the Darkling's heart to stop, is a hand sticking out of the rubbles. An arm in a purple kefta with grey and black embroidery.

'No…' Aleksander says, horrified, and throws himself at the rubbles. He quickly moves them away. He's not even aware Tolya is helping him. Nor that there are also more hands, as Ivan and Fedyor also have showed up after hearing the explosion.

'[Y/N],' Kirigan says, his voice shaking, as he finally can take your body out of the mess. There are scratches on your face and some bruises are also forming already. But you're breathing. You're alive. And suddenly, your eyes flutter open.

'[Y/N]?' the Darkling asks, anxious. You smile slightly at him. Your eyes find Yul-Bataar.

'Nikolai says… that it's time… to get out… of the shadows…' you whisper and lose consciousness. Tolya's shoulders slump.

'What does that mean?' Fedyor asks. Yul-Bataar looks at Kirigan.

'That it's time to show the world you're alive,' he explains.

'Good, because there's nothing that could stop me now,' Aleksander says, his voice low. 'Fedyor, take her to the Healers.'

'Yes, sir,' Kaminsky says, his face serious. Kirigan stands up slowly, the look in his eyes absolutely murderous.

'Don't worry, [Y/N],' he says. 'They will pay for this. All of them.'

*

Nikolai kills another enemy and looks around with a grim face. It's not looking good. But for some reason, the soldiers are not trying to kill every one they see, but they clearly are trying to get inside. For what, Lantsov has no idea. He managed to hear a fragment of a conversation between them. He only managed to hear something about 'finding the girl'. But what girl? Ehri? But she's in the Grand Palace. Alina? Zoya?

He gets his answer when everything is covered in the darkness out of the blue. He instantly looks at the entrance to the building. There stands Kirigan, the look of absolute fury on his face.

'Someone did something to [Y/N],' David guesses, showing up by Lantsov's side. 'Very bad move.'

These, who recognise the Darkling, stop fighting. There are looks of fear and surprise. And also, some of awe.

Kirigan sends his shadows to attack soldiers from Shu-Han. Everyone now know who he is. The King's soldiers quickly scatter. Ivan shows up by Nikolai's side and grabs his arm. He pulls him away.

'What are you-?' Lantsov starts. But he doesn't finish. He doesn't have to. Because he sees Aleksander bringing his hands together and forming the Cut. With an angry roar, he sends it at their enemies, cutting them in two parts. They don't even feel it.

Silence falls. Kirigan straightens up, breathing heavily. Others slowly turn to face him.

'The Darkling…'

'It's the Darkling…'

'He's here…'

'He's alive…'

To Nikolai's astonishment and horror, some Grisha fall on their knees, staring at the Shadow Summoner with stunned expressions. But what shocks Lantsov even more, is that Kirigan just glances at them and marches back into the building with Tolya at his heels.

'You know, I expected some grand speech at his first public appearance,' the King says after a beat.

'He has other things on his mind,' Ivan explains, finally releasing Nikolai.

'[Y/N]?' David asks with worry. The Heartrender clenches his jaw.

'They blew up a hole in a wall,' he explains. 'We found her in the rubbles.'

Lantsov curses and runs a hand through his hair. Kostyk rushes back inside, not waiting for anyone.

'She didn't look too bad,' Ivan says.

'Let's see how much she got hit, then,' the King says and glances at still stunned people. 'And after that we have to do some damage control.'

The Heartrender nods. They hurry after David. They reach an infirmary. To their relief, you're already sitting on a table with an amused expression on your face. You're surrounded by Fedyor, Aleksander, Tolya, David and Tamar.

'I'm telling you, I'm fine,' you say, exasperated, and notice two new guests. 'Ah, maybe you can talk some sense into them. You see I'm fine, right?'

'I'll have to ask a specialist to say that,' Nikolai says, reaching your group.

'She's fine,' a passing Healer says. 'She managed to protect herself from more serious hits.'

'See?' you ask with triumph.

'You still need rest, milaya,' Kirigan insists. Lantsov nods.

'I agree,' he concurs. 'We can't afford to lose you now, [Y/N]. Or drop dead from exhaustion.'

You huff and cross your arms. But you don't argue anymore. You allow Fedyor and Ivan fuss around you a bit.

The King catches the looks of the Darkling, David and Tolya one by one. They follow him out of the room.

'How is the mood outside?' the Heartrender asks.

'Hard to say,' Nikolai sighs. 'Everyone is mostly shocked. Some Grisha kneeled. But for now, no one has started a riot.'

'So… what now?' David asks hesitantly. Lantsov and Kirigan look at each other. Aleksander calmly puts his hands behind his back. The King thinks for a moment.

'We're coming back to Os Alta,' he finally decides. 'All of us. The rumours are about to spread anyway. We must control the narrative.'

'Are you sure the people are ready?' Tolya asks doubtfully.

'I don't think they'll ever be, to be honest,' Nikolai answers after a pause. 'We've been just putting away the inevitable in time.'

'What about the Apparat?' Aleksander asks. 'We still haven't found him.'

'He will show up the moment we arrive to the capital,' Lantsov answers. 'I'm sure of it.'

'And then?' David asks. 'What do we do?'

'We'll put Yuri to good use,' Kirigan suggests. 'Let them argue publicly.'

'I don't want another civil war,' the King protests.

'There won't be,' the Darkling says with a disturbing smile. 'Some people will side with the Apparat, but not enough to cause a riot.'

'How can you be so sure?' Tolya scoffs. The Shadow Summoner looks at him.

'Because I've just stopped an attack of Shu-Han,' he answers. 'For months there have been miracles that people believe were my doing.'

'But they weren't,' David reminds him.

'They don't need to know it,' Kirigan argues. 'And sometimes manipulation of the people is necessary if you want to keep this country save, Your Majesty. And since the three Saints are dead… no one will tell on us.'

'Let's say I agree,' Nikolai says glumly. 'What else?'

'Well, I've been resurrected, haven't I?' the Darkling asks, shrugging. 'It's both fascinating and terrifying for the people. And they all adore you. If they see you with me, assuring them we've made peace for the good of Ravka, they will calm down. Ah. There's also one more thing.'

'The antidote,' Lantsov immediately guesses. 'Yes. We have to make it known we can make it.'

'They will come to steal it,' David points out. 'Or destroy it.'

'They've already did,' Tolya sighs. 'At least that's what we suspect with Kirigan.'

'I've heard Shu-Han soldiers talking about "finding the girl",' the King says, understanding. 'They were talking about [Y/N].'

'Somehow they've found out she's the one who created it,' David says, going pale.

'Which makes her and you our most valuable assets,' Nikolai says, looking at Aleksander. 'They will expect you two to travel together. Which is why you have to arrive in Os Alta separately. You can handle yourself and she'll have the best protection. I swear.'

'She can handle herself, too,' the Darkling says calmly. 'Unless a wall falls on her, that is. So, send Ivan with her. He's very protective of her. More than of me.'

Lantsov nods, agreeing to this. He smiles wryly at his companions.

'Shall we then?' he asks. 'Better to arrive before the Apparat. I'd like to keep the crown for a while longer.'

*

The journey to Os Alta is not boring only thanks to Ivan. He keeps you entertained thanks to telling you all about his life with Fedyor during the last three years. You're glad to hear they've been happy. They also plan to get married. They waited with that for you and Aleksander, which makes your heart melt.

'Everything alright in there?' Isaak, who's been assigned to you as well and is riding on a horse next to you, asks as you get close to the capital.

'We can't wait to get out of this coach, but other than that we're good,' you answer. 'Do you have any messages about others?'

'Just that they were attacked on the way but easily subdued the attackers,' the soldier answers and chuckles. 'Apparently, they were surprised not to find you with the Darkling.'

'Who would have thought that Lantsov was right about that,' Ivan murmurs.

'He's not an idiot, contrary to your belief,' you say, rolling your eyes. 'And yes, that plan was brilliant. I trust everyone got out of it alright?'

'No serious injuries nor worse,' Isaak confirms. You exhale with relief.

'Good,' you say. 'Now the worst part. Convincing people we mean no harm.'

'Luckily, the party is to start without us,' Ivan comments. 'Maybe they will finish without us as well?'

'I doubt that,' you chuckle. 'Thank you, Isaak.'

'Milady,' the soldier says, nodding his head respectfully to you and disappears from your view. Ivan looks at you curiously.

'I saved his life, remember?' you ask. The Heartrender nods, understanding now.

Some time later you arrive in Os Alta. People are on the streets. The mood varies. You see shocked faces. Stunned. Angry. Overjoyed. People are praying. Crying. But no one is shouting.

'It's quiet,' you murmur. Ivan nods, noticing it as well. You quickly find out the reason. In front of the Grand Palace two groups are facing each other. Followers of the Apparat and followers of Yuri. In the middle of them are Nikolai, Aleksander and others. Lantsov doesn't look happy. Kirigan is calm and collected as always.

'Looks like they got here in time,' Ivan says. 'Do you think we'll make it worse?'

You don't answer him. You listen to the argument with a sour mood, as you pass the people. All eyes are on you and Ivan, as you step out of the coach.

'And here's a creator of the miracle!' Yuri cries, causing you to wince. '[Y/N] [L/N], the most powerful Durast, has brought the Starless Saint back to us!'

People murmur, astonished. Some also angry. You ignore them and join your friends.

'How we're doing?' you murmur.

'It varies from moment to moment,' Genya sighs. 'I'm not convinced about this plan of yours.'

'It will be fine,' Nikolai assures her, forcing a smile. It drops, the moment the Apparat points an accusatory finger at you.

'I've warned you, Your Majesty!' he shouts. 'I told you releasing her will do Ravka no good! She broke the rules of life and brought the enemy of Ravka back among us!'

'I wasn't thrilled about it at first either,' Lantsov says loudly. 'But after calm conversations we came to an agreement. We need them both to make Ravka safe and secure.'

'They've corrupted you!' Apparat cries. 'You no longer deserve to be our leader! You've been seduced by power and that Durast girl!'

'I beg your pardon?' you ask, astonished. 'I did what now?'

People murmur. You can see that some agree. You must do something and fast.

However, you're not the one who does that something. One of the followers of the Apparat pulls out a knife. People scream and pull away.

'Die, witch!' he shouts and throws it at you. No one has time to react. It lodges itself in your chest. People scream and gasp. You look at the knife and then at the monk.

'Do you need this back or…?' you ask. Silence falls. Everyone stares at you in shock.

'You're asking if you can keep the knife in your rib cage?' Nikolai asks slowly.

'Yes, it's very… homey,' you confirm.

'It's a fucking knife!' Zoya scoffs. You pull out the knife easily, causing people to gasp, and show it to her.

'Look how pretty it is!' you say.

'Sankta!' someone cries. You look at the crows, surprised.

'Sorry?' you ask. People look at you with awe.

'She resurrected the Darkling and now didn't die herself,' someone says. 'A true Sankta.'

'Now hold on just a minute,' you say, panicked. But people look at you tears in their eyes. They fall on their knees, saying:

'Sankta. Sankta [Y/N].'

'No, I'm not!' you protest. 'It's… It's just my kefta-'

'Don't, lapushka,' Aleksander says, grabbing your arm. 'Let them believe it. Look at them. And now look at the Apparat.'

You do as he says. You see how people look at you with joy. And Apparat is nervous. It's clear he's lost today.

'I know you don't like it, [Y/N],' Nikolai says quietly. 'But for now, let them believe you're their Saint.'

You stare at him with horror. But when you look at the people again, you know he's right. They're ready to defend you from the Apparat. As longs as you're on the King's side, they will support him. And the Darkling as well.

'Fine, but under one condition,' you say.

'Name it,' Lantsov agrees quickly. But when you turn to him, he regrets his decision. There's that unnerving look in your eyes again. And his blood runs cold, when you say:

'Bring me Alina Starkov.'

A/N: Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts! Reblog, like and comment if you could. Every comment makes my day!

This can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52696933/chapters/135301627

[velvetvexations]

That sounds a lot like my interpretation of Boys Will Be Bugs~!

I bent over backwards and crafted an elaborate theory as to why Eminem's Abracadabra isn't too terribly transphobic, I can't judge anyone for making excuses for the media that's important to them.

I don't think characters just being heroic and sympathetic necessarily covers getting something like this badly wrong, but a lot of other Velveteers also chimed in, including this anon:

(Just realized this is pretty silly, feel free to ignore me/not answer this, I just saw One Piece mentioned and the hyperfixation jumped out.) But just to go to bat for One Piece a smidge as someone who is trans and read all of it, while yeah Okama(Queen Ivan) leaned very transmisognistc(which was made worse in the anime for some reason??) the intention for him, his subjects, and the other gender fluid character, Bon Clay, was meant to be good. It fell HELLA short, but there was an attempt at least. However!! I did want to add, the comic has been going on for a long time, and by one of the more recent arcs with two new, very clearly openly trans characters, things are MUCH better! The transfem one, Kiku, says outright when asked that she's a woman at heart which is accepted by everyone, and her story was really sweet and made me tear up(her anger is never treated as predatory or masculine, she's allowed to just be a woman who is also a samurai), and the other transmasc one, Yamato, is referred to as a boy by everyone despite him not changing his presentation at all, which is pretty rad imo given how hostile people can be to transmasc people with breasts, and both characters are allowed to bathe in the baths that match their genders at the end of the arc. They were still a little messy in the "yeah this wasn't written by a trans person" way, and certain misogynistic/transphobic parts of of the fandom on reddit get a little weird about Yamato, but I didn't see anything glaringly wrong with the way either of them was written like with Okama or Bon Clay. The vibe I got from the comic was that early on Oda meant well and included some characters who were intended to be positive rep but were messy and fell very short, but as time passed he figured it out and the more recent ones are genuinely phenomenal rep. Ofc that doesn't mean you need to read/watch OP(especially since again the transmisogny is worse in the anime?? still don't understand what happened there but Oda had no control over it) like god I would never tell anyone to do that lol, but I did want to just chime in and offer a perspective from someone who read it and felt like the more recent rep was really good and worth mentioning. Oda has his issues for sure, and has a lot to make up for, but based on what I've read he IS making up for it.

And, honestly, that makes me really happy! Oda always seemed like a cool guy and it's great to know he is in fact a real cool guy. According to @changelingfangs in the replies, he's friends with people in the subculture he based a lot of those characters on.

They're now just openly accusing me of not being a trans woman because trans women don't identify as AMAB and I'm apparently hostile to every trans woman that talks about transmisogyny.

...no?

It's a good theory and I think that plays a part in it for sure, but I think mostly it's just thinking it's the worse thing because it's their group's oppression. It again kinna goes back to that Lennon/Ono song with the n-word in the title, that's just how radical feminism works, trans/misogyny is the only thing that really matters.

Still, interesting thread to have spotted here and I think it's in that soup somewhere.

imagine thinking using a meme format is asserting a cultural claim to it

like seriously, has any Black person ever said that there was something wrong with "deracializing" either or even both characters in the Dis _ Look So Mad meme by substituting them with white characters?

[rebouks]

Okay, so I'm being completely self-indulgent here but I went on a little foray and dug up a load of old posts n' such to go thru Wyatt's journey n' pick out some important moments/juicy tidbits so uh.. here it is if you're interested ����

Major Somnium spoilers if you haven't read it yet tho so be warned...

The first hint of genuine emotion/doubt we see cross Wyatt's face, and it's about his father.. hmmmmm, also to be noted is that even if he did up sticks n' go to work with Ash, he wouldn't have been free of anything, least of all his father's judgement!

The infamous Silas scene, yikes.. two things here, anytime he mentions it, it's not Wyatt's reach, always Arturo's! Like Oscar said recently, he doesn't have any connections now that he's gone (and Ashton, so.. oops) Second of all, Bruno DID understand.. which is interesting. Wyatt's family may not have been any relation to Bruno by blood, but they were still his found family for a long time and he n' Wyatt didn't much care for each other either, but they knew one another pretty well (what they showed each other anyway aha..) So yeah, he didn't LIKE it, but he UNDERSTOOD.. much to Ivan's dismay 🙈

Wyatt pretty much admits here that he's pretending his way through life.. which is SUPER fun to look back on, 'cause we all took him at face value here, but who's to say it wasn't just another act? 🤷‍♂️ He learnt to look at the world through calculated logic at a very young age.. and he's kinda right, if you observe everything & everyone else from a neutral standpoint, it's pretty interesting what you can see that you might've missed if you were too angry, sad etc.. to notice...

Did anyone believe Wyatt when he said he would leave Joslyn's kids out of it? 'Cause he was telling the truth.. maybe she should'a called his bluff. An easy bargaining chip, never to be played.

After learning of Oscar's plan, Wyatt decides to help him.. why? I don't think he's sure at this point, he just knew he'd had enough of his father's disrespect and wanted to fuck him over.

This is suuuper interesting, mostly because of Bruno's "no".. he's a bit of a hypocrite ngl, cos he knew more than Wyatt, and for longer, that what he, Artie n' co. were up to was wrong, yet he stuck with them, protected them and continued to work for them anyway. The difference between them tho, is that Arturo respected and trusted Bruno enough that he would've let him leave if he wanted to, but he didn't.. and Wyatt never had that luxury ⚆_⚆

In this scene we (I think?) first got a glimpse into Wyatt's brain, and I particularly like this part...

Although he wanted to prove to Arturo that he had been right, he knew he couldn’t risk it. Doing so would only reveal his own betrayal. It should have been satisfying, but Wyatt could already feel himself shrinking under his father’s cold, piercing gaze as he realised his own son had deceived him so immeasurably. He didn’t need to know; his demise would be satisfying enough, it had to be.

Simply because as it turned out, it wasn't satisfying at all.. and Arturo was already well aware of his own son's involvement at this point, double yikes.

So everything's gone to shit but Wyatt/Darien are still sitting pretty with Ashton.. but why is it sad boi hours? Why doesn't it feel right? Hmmmmm.. I like this scene because Wyatt's pretty much lost his whole family and yet.. is he sad? He doesn't think so, not really. It's kinda the start of him "waking up" so to speak, with no one left to live "for" and no one to impress, please or serve he's lost at sea! It's fun, because honestly at this point he could have slotted neatly into life in Del Sol. He could've worked with Ash, business as usual, new connections and protections, lotsa women, lotsa money and power..... and yet.. it doesn't feel right? 🤔 HMMMMMMMMMMM

Thanks to Brynn's help, Wyatt finally comes face to face with the reality of his actions. It's interesting for so many reasons.. first of all, he'd always kept the details at bay, 'cause that's what he was used to, what was easier, what he was taught to do.. business isn't personal, right Pookie? 🙈 and Ashton hadn't exactly told the whole truth either, making out like the girls would work for him (which ig they would in a way, at least some of em.. but it's definitely worse than Wyatt assumed, which I think can show how naive he could still be sometimes) but with no daddy around to answer to/impress, and no one left to pretend to, Wyatt suddenly NEEDED to know and there was no one left to persuade him otherwise.

Love this scene.. Wyatt's still a little demented isn't he, taking sadistic pleasure in fucking someone over, but at least this time he's on the right fkin side. Look at that smirk.. ohhh Ashton you are fucked, but please enjoy your sauna whilst you can 😁

So it's been a few years at this point and Wyatt's had a hell of a lot of time to think, and a lot of distance from his old life. He doesn't really know who he is at the moment, but he's kinda learning to just BE instead of pretending all the time.. kinda scary, tho a little less so when you've adopted a cute old neighbour who invades your space with his genuine care and good advice. Something Wyatt's definitely not used to, but he doesn't completely hate it.

Not only does bumping into Brynn again make Wyatt realise how grateful he was for her help, but it also kinda forces him to stop ignoring his past. Her visit and their brief time spent together really made him start looking back at his old life n' tryna figure out how it fit into his new one. He still has no idea who he is or who he should be and it's particularly disconcerting to him how comfortable Brynn is around him, given what she knows...

He'd just about managed to keep it at bay until this point, but it's time for an existential crisis 🤸‍♀️

Ahhh baba Ichi is so kind 😭 would he still be so keen to help Wyatt if he knew about his past? Who knows.. but he sees someone struggling and he wants to help! I think it's interesting that Wyatt trusts him/likes him enough at this point to actually admit his doubts/feelings, which is more than he'd ever done before. He might not see it yet, but it's still progress.

Brynn's back, and she's about to fuck Wyatt's shit up (in the best way).. I love how he's been so wrapped up in his own misadventures that he hadn't even stopped to think about hers. If we're gonna look at things in black and white (which we don't do here but just bear with) they're both "bad" people who've done terrible things and made terrible decisions; driven by necessity, both perceived and literal. They've taken lives without regret, stolen from people who didn't deserve it, fucked people over for their own survival or for revenge ETC ETC.. and yet, Brynn knows she's not black and white, she knows she's still capable of being a good person and she can see it in him too, even if he's like ??? about it himself.

Wyatt not only admits his feelings to himself, but to Brynn too.. and goes against what HE wants n' agrees to her wishes instead, putting someone else first for like.. the first time EVER 😳

Though he was glad to know the truth, Wyatt was less than thrilled with Brynn’s plan; but she craved true freedom, and after everything she’d endured – in part due to his own transgressions – he figured he owed her as much.

What sorcery is this?!

Wyatt's not great with empathy or at putting himself in others shoes, but I loved this scene with him n' Oscar because now he's actually been forced into Oscar's well worn vans and he had no choice but to confront his previous decisions head on.. he did NOT like his own medicine and I think it's the first time he properly felt regret/guilt.. super important discovery.

Ahh the crux of the issue, daddy issues.. 😅 I'm not saying Wyatt didn't have free will or the chance to idk NOT partake in the family "bidness" but idk, he was indoctrinated into that life since birth. The fact that he eventually made it this far and didn't go totally insane in the process is still kinda impressive.

We don't have to forgive him, Brynn hasn't, and won't.. but people are grey and there's hope things will be different in the future. I love how much these two have been through in life, yet still managed to SOMEHOW end up with a second chance/a way to be & do better. Idk I think it's awesome (disagree with me if u want idc ahahakjsdksj) and I especially love that they literally know almost every nasty detail about each other but still perceive the other as "good" despite those details.. ough

With a dead dad (yay), plenty of distance, a lot of time and some forced introspection not only from himself but Brynn, Oscar, etc.. and ELLIS, Wyatt finally broke in the best way possible. It'll take time and it'll still be shit at times but now that everything's outta the bottle maybe he can piece everything together again. I especially love this part..

The moment Ellis had made his way into the world, something deep inside Wyatt’s soul had shattered, breaking into a million tiny pieces that pricked his heart with every shred of hurt, regret, and stifled guilt he’d ever buried within its previously impenetrable depths. Try as he might, the tears refused to cease.

I think it was easy to believe that Wyatt was a psychopath (that was the point) but we only believed it with such conviction because HE did too. I think he's relieved to finally learn that that's NOT the case, even if it's scary af tryna figure out who he is from scratch.. but hey, he has a pretty good reason too now. Being the dad he wished he had... ;-;

Anyway.. thanks for coming to my pointless, long ass, self-indulgent TED talk, if you read all this please take a cookie on the way out and know that ily muchly 🖤🍪

[crotchety-old-emu]

OLITDP chapter 24 references

as i mentioned in my author's notes of the chapter, there's a few references that i would like to share with those who are interested in them. you don't need to know about them to understand what's going on in the story, obviously, but perhaps it's nice to have some visual aids to go with some of the things that are happening.

if you haven't read the latest chapter yet, and you want to remain spoiler free, it's best to skip this post (or perhaps come back to it later). you can find chapter 24 of our love is these days' piano here!

so here's a short list of things that might be interesting - but definitely not necessary - to know about chapter 24:

penelope's dress at the trowbridge ball is a silvery sea green. the one i had in mind was kind of like this one, from the season three behind the scenes pics. nicola looks stunning in green, especially with the red hair. i found beatrice knight's regency color compendium, a stunning overview of all the fashionable colours of fabric in the regency era, with some fantastic descriptions of how they were made and when they were worn. the willow/sea green colour shown on this page is exactly the hue i was picturing while writing.

lady trowbridge's decorations: i spent days and days researching how lady trowbridge might showcase her wealth and peculiar tastes during this ball, but honestly, i didn't find much info about ballroom decorations and i didn't want to make up things that definitely could not have happened. so i settled on things that i was already fairly certain of were pretty decadent for the era: pineapples and ice cream. after reading up on ice cream in regency times through several sources, i came across the website of ivan day, who is a food historian and has worked on some bbc regency costume dramas. he had a very insightful youtube video on how ice cream was made in those days. in it, he makes one of the ice cream pineapples i mention in the story. ivan day's actual website is under construction, but i found a photo of moulded ice groups, as they were presented in regency times, on another page which was taken from his. it includes ice cream shaped like a swan (which may have been parmesan flavoured, which apparently was a popular ice cream flavour back then).

another food decoration that both eloise and penelope mention is a flummery solomon's temple. i found out about these through watching the bbc documentary pride and prejudice - having a ball, which talks about accurate representation of balls during regency times on television. the part of the doc i'm linking to is the part where ivan day reveals a solomon's temple and explains that this would be a staple on all upper-class tables in those days. the white bits, if i'm not mistaken, are milk-flavoured, the brown is chocolate and/or coffee, the pink is coloured with cochineal.

he also has a page on solomon's temples on his blog, which has a very amusing short clip of how exactly these jellies moved. if you watch it (highly recommend), i'm sure you'll understand why eloise would think it was a good thing to comment on. ivan day himself describes it as:

Because it is made of flummery, which is a kind of opaque milk jelly, the central obelisk wobbles and cavorts in a most entertaining manner, while the four little cones shake, rattle and roll in a very naughty way.

the dance: i must have watched at least fifty different dances that were popular at the time - shoutout to regencydances.org, which not only has a very extensive list of dances, but also a youtube channel and animations showing what the dances would have looked like. i based penelope and anthony's dance on the northdown waltz - which granted, only became a thing from 1820 onwards, so it's technically an anachronism for them to be dancing it. it simply was the only dance that best fit with how i wanted the scene to go. you can find an instruction video on the northdown waltz here. anthony, in this case, would be the red rectangle, penelope the green ellipsis. here's a clip of actual people performing the dance, so you can kind of imagine what it would have looked like. i always knew anthony's confession would happen during a dance, my main inspiration for that was this scene from becoming jane. if you've seen the film, you undoubtedly know exactly which scene i'm talking about without even clicking the link. i remember that when i first saw this part of the film, i stopped breathing for a minute, because it was just such an intense moment, which was exactly what i wanted for anthony's big moment.

there you go, some insight into the tiny things mentioned in the latest chapter that you might perhaps enjoy knowing more about. hope at least some of you found it interesting!

also, i want to mention: i am not a historian, i don't claim that my fic is historically accurate, not in the very least. i try to stick to period-appropriate things, which i do as much research for as i can. but some mistakes will have slipped in there, i am very much aware. so if this is a particular pet peeve for some of the history buffs among you, i apologise.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

Honestly Blake is one of the most interesting characters ever

Bestie, I could go on for a while on how much I love Blake. (Like Cam I'm quieter about him being in my top five.)

(Hi future Messy here, this went on for longer than I thought because I took this as an excuse to give an analysis on why I like Blake. So all of that is under the cut if you're interested.)

I like yanderes by themselves (one of the reasons I enjoyed Ivan's storyline.) but the fact that Blake isn't your typical form of yandere when you think about the word is even better. Like when you think of yandere you think of "oh my god I've been drugged and tied up in a basement while this person monologues at me about how we're meant to be together. I haven't seen this person before/saw them once or twice but don't really remember them!"

Meanwhile with Blake, he's been friends with his listener for years. (Probably childhood friends even though it's never directly confirmed. I think it just says Yandere Cult friend)

He also never tried to push them to be with him. Maybe that's because his listener was made aware of his tendencies (I would give my left kidney for a flashback audio of how THAT conversation happened. Also if Erik released a BA of Blake and Bestie's first night together, I would probably invest in patreon ngl. The knowledge that Vega has two audios *even if its impVega* was almost enough. But I'd also prolly get uncomfy trying to listen to it. It really depends how he makes the BA's. N e ways) so they would be able to call him out if he started growing more obsessive and possessive.

Although they might like that considering they agreed to be with him after he said he won't be able to give them space or distance.

I've looked into childhood friend yanderes, and usually they still end up drugging their love interest or whatever and bring up the fact that "we make such good friends, you know we would be perfect together" type of thing.

BUT Blake never does that. He's one of those rare yanderes who understand boundaries and respect their love interests enough to not push past those. It makes him less intense of a yandere (and acts as a gateway drug to get people into yanderes. But that's besides the point.) He's just content being in their life.

Could this be because he knows his listener is going to die soon, and he doesn't want to waste time trying to be more when he's content just having their attention? Sure. He might be trying to change their future, but he still needs to prepare for it to come in case he fails.

Imagine having someone who is willing to drop anything for you, joins a cult to try to save you, commits crimes for you... but also respects any boundaries on the relationship you have with them? Yes please.

Not to mention, whenever he's with his listener... Blake becomes so soft. Sure, the change in how he treats Sunshine and how he treats his listener can be a bit startling. But that change is what makes him being soft so much more enjoyable to me. He has the ability to be a total asshole, but he's not. (Same type of reason why I like tsunderes or soft manipulators like Vega.)

Now that's not to say that I don't like how mean Blake can be. The way he's so harsh and passionate about something that he's willing to risk anything? The way he talks down to Sunshine? Uses their nickname as a weapon against them (makes me wonder if they'll ever be able to hear it the same again, even if it comes from Elliot.)? I eat that up.

I got on my rose colored glasses, so there just seems to be a lot of flags right now.

[bringerofdeathandtheapocolypse]

I just thought about this now but I can't recall Makarov and Ivan ever directly interacting with each other.

Like the closest we got was Makarov being unhappy with everything to do with Raven tail in the games.

Like Gajeel got to have a couple lines of dialogue with him and he was the spy. (Which side note, the fact we never see anything further from that aside from a mention and a flashback post Fantasia is missed potential)

But it's so bizarre that we never see either of them interact. We've never actually seen what them having a conversation is like because we've only ever heard stuff about it second hand through other characters talking.

We don't even know what exactly got Ivan kicked out of the guild. I don't think it's related to the dragon lacrima since Laxus was way younger when that happened. The most we know is Laxus was a teen but that's such a wide period of time that Ivan could have been exiled in. It also can't be lumen histore since Makarov clearly didn't know Ivan was aware of its existence until after his fight with Laxus.

Like I want to know what it was that Ivan did and why hardly anyone talks about him.

Like the kids I can believe since it's possible some if not most of them weren't at the guild when Ivan was exiled and Laxus also makes sense since he seems like the time to not want to bring things like that up. But why did we never hear a single mention of Ivan from anyone else before or after Fantasia.

I mean this is a guild with a decent amount of gossips in it. Surely someone would mention something about Ivan. Like a good moment to bring it up might be when Laxus is being an absolute ass. Maybe have one of the older members compare his behaviour to Ivan and voice concerns on Laxus becoming like his father.

I do like Ivan's proper introduction where he's talking to Gajeel which puts a seed of doubt in Gajeel's loyalty to Fairy tail for a bit. That was very cool and is an interesting set up.

Like in general, Ivan had such good potential for a villian. We've known of his existence for most of the series (I think his first mention was in Fantasia but I might be wrong, been a bit since I watched pre fantasia) and he had a relation with three of Fairy tail's members by the end of Fantasia, that being Laxus, Makarov and Gajeel.

I can kinda understand not seeing much from Laxus since he sorta just nopes out of existence for two months (which is why I can understand that some people don't mesh with his redemption since we don't really see it occur, it just kinda happens off screen and everyone forgives him which kinda also happens for Jellal which honestly, he did way worse than Laxus and he just sorta forgets it for a bit so again I can see why it doesn't mesh with some people) but we still have Makarov and Gajeel prominently.

Ivan should have been an underlying villian, have a few more scenes of Gajeel's spy work either with him talking to Ivan or Makarov and actually give us more information about Ivan and his past in Fairy tail. He doesn't need to be sympathetic, just give me a reason for his decisions and also you know, tell us what the fuck he did to get exciled.

And I've brought this up before but have him be way more prominent of a villian in GMG than he was. Have him try to fuck over Fairy tail in the games, even roping Gajeel into it with threats (like saying he's getting too attached for their plan and have him threaten someone in the guild like Team shadow gear or Lily for example) and have his members go after the mages in the night like they did with Wendy and Carla but in a way it can't be easily traced back to Raven tail's guild so like no magic use or purposely obscuring their faces (cause why don't the dragon slayer s try explaining that they're sure it was a raven tail member based on scent and have the council take something that exclusively 5 to 7 people in the country can do as proper evidence)

I also still stand by the fact that Gajeel should have gotten a repercussion for his spying. I personally go with a physical one but there are plenty of options. My personal favourite spot is right before the Ivan Vs Laxus fight, maybe even have Ivan use Gajeel as a way to get Laxus to listen to him by threatening to kill him and when Laxus tries to find a way around it to get Gajeel help (who would likely be drained of magic with Ivan's orders) Ivan instead severally injures Gajeel. That's just an option. There are tons.

Like Ivan is just so underutilized as a villian and it makes me sad because it's so interesting. He's one of three villains that have come from the Fairy tail guild. The other two being Hades (obviously) and Wraith(who died and lost his memories and also isn't even a true 'villian' just someone fighting on the opposite side to FT) and all three have vastly different reasons for becoming a villian/antagonist. But we just didn't really get much for him.