#i Have to do cantonese tonight

[mononijikayu]

blue — fushiguro megumi.

As you walked hand in hand through the snow, Fushiguro Megumi felt like your warmth and his blended together, refusing to part as you made your way away from the shrine. The thought of that made him feel like the winter was nothing, the biting chill rendered powerless against the steady heat of your presence. It was the kind of moment that made the world feel smaller and quieter. It was as if the universe had decided to go on a pause just for the two of you. It was as if these two hands were meant to fit because destiny said so.

GENRE: Alternate Universe - Canon Convergence;

WARNING/s: AFAB! Reader, Safe For Work (SFW), Long Distance Romance (LDR), Aged Up Characters (Megumi and Reader are 18!), Young Love, Innocent Romance, Established Relationship, Middle School Classmates to Lovers, Teasing, Teenagers, Feelings, Fluff, First Love, Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Flirting, Humor, Domesticity, Slice of Life, Light-Hearted, Confessions, Pining, Holding Hands;

WORD COUNT: 5.3k words.

NOTE: im a bit late, i'm sorry!!! i had a whole list of chores i helped my family with and i met up with some people yesterday, since i might not see them for christmas due to schedules. but i'm here. i always imagined megumi to be the sort of person who loves so wholeheartedly and so innocently. i wanted to capture that for his birthday. happy birthday, megumi!!! you will always be so loved by me <33333 i love you all too!!! thank you for reading!!! see you for yuuji's own fic on 24th <3 (asia time)

addendum: i just want you to know that the exact number of the words are 5302. chinese/cantonese numerology expresses that 53 means my life, 0 means good and 2 means joy and sometimes double joy. it reads as 'my life is good joy' and i think between them reader and megumi, that's genuinely true <333

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THE DARK BLUE SWIRLED AROUND THE SKY TENDERLY TONIGHT. Had there been more time, he would have enjoyed it more. But he knew there wasn’t. He had to get to you, immediately. He bit his lip softly against the cold winter wind.

Fushiguro Megumi tugged the bright tender scarf tighter around his neck as the frigid wind bit at his cheeks. He caught a faint whiff of the fabric, and something about the scent felt... off.

It’s a good scent, don’t get him wrong. But it wasn’t the familiar one he was used to. Had he bought a new perfume and just forgotten about it? 

He sighed to himself. He was too busy lately, going off on missions. And now a lot of his life had become footnotes, even if he didn’t want them to be. Megumi knew he had to do better.

He had to do whatever he could to make a better pace for himself. Still, thinking about that right now is impossible. He had to brush the thought aside. There were more pressing things to focus on—like how late he was. Again. 

Megumi could only hope that you weren’t waiting too long or that you had arrived late. But now he can’t help but think if you wore that thick Arc'teryx coat he’d gotten you. Or if you wore mittens or had enough hot packs on your body at this moment. Guilt started to echo into his head as easily as it was breathing. But he can’t help but feel that.

He took a moment to breathe, his breath visible in the cold air. He hated being late about absolutely anything. He likes punctuality, after all. But he especially likes it when it comes to you.

Because that meant he’d have more time with you. And more time with you means that he’d have you with him enough to sweep the thought of missing you for a little while. 

But being a sorcerer, the job description didn’t care about holidays or plans. Or even the personal, the thoughts and moments that made one happy. It just never stops. Not even when he was supposed to take you out on a date on New Year’s Eve. Megumi absolutely reviled it. If he saw a curse, he had to deal with it, no matter the time. 

And somehow, some sort of way, still, he knew you understood. You always did. You always reassured him of that no matter what. No matter how many times his responsibilities pulled him away from you, even just for five minutes.

You never stopped smiling when he finally showed up. You don’t stop having the warmest red on your cheeks when you see him. Your eyes always shone brighter than Sirius when you both stand beside one another.

Even though you weren’t a sorcerer yourself, you tried to understand his world, even the parts that didn’t make sense to you at all. It wasn’t fair to you, and he knew it. Yet, no matter how hard things got, you never gave up on him. You just didn’t want to, even when he had tried to keep you at bay. 

That was one of the things he appreciated most about you. Megumi had never had quite a lot of joy in his life, but he was to be honest, you were one of them. You always will be. And even now, you stand by him, even if it’s hard.

You didn’t care for the hard stuff, you always said it was part of it. Because what mattered to you, was having him in your life. And he was certain he felt the same way about you.

Well, it’s obvious.

Why else would he start running in this cold winter weather?

If it’s you, the person he loved most, then he’ll find a way?

After all, he wanted to be with you for as long as possible.

He paused for a moment, staring at the message. The small emoji made something in his chest tighten, as much as it made his body feel the warmest it had ever been. Despite everything, you still cared enough to wait for him, to worry about him. A small, rare smile tugged at his lips.

The faint vibration of his phone snapped him out of his thoughts. He fished it out of his pocket, his cold fingers fumbling slightly as he unlocked it. A text from you lit up his screen:

“Megu, baby, where are you? 🥺”

Megumi stared at his phone after hitting send, watching the little delivered mark appear. Megumi has thought about how many times he’d sent similar texts, always apologizing to you, for more often than he hoped, about being late.

He typed back quickly, his fingers stiff from the cold.

"On my way, babe. Sorry for being late."

Yet, you never seemed to hold it against him. He wished you had. Most romantic partners would be so fed up with such a position. 

Hell, most of them would have already left their partners. But not you. You never had thought of it, not even during middle school, when Gojo started to take him on his missions to observe. You were steadfast, because you saw his efforts. You saw how much he loved you. 

And that was enough. He never had to doubt that you loved him. And perhaps, that’s why he kept running. He wanted to get to you, as soon as possible. He wanted to see you. He wanted to hold you in his arms. He wanted to love you.

As he slipped his phone back into his pocket, Fushiguro Megumi picked up his pace. He had to. He had to arrive as soon as possible. For once, he hoped the world could hold its chaos at bay. Just for tonight. He owed you that much. He owed you all of the world. And he had to make it possible, even if just for a little while.

His phone buzzed again almost immediately.

“Okay, but you better hurry, baby! It’s cold! Also… why does your scarf smell like my perfume? 🤔”

Megumi stopped in his tracks, his brain processing your words at a glacial pace. Your perfume? His hand instinctively went to the scarf wrapped snugly around his neck. That was the weird smell he’d noticed earlier—the soft, floral notes he’d never associated with his usual scarf. His mind raced. If this was your perfume, then this wasn’t his scarf.

It’s your scarf. The realization hit him like a curse to the chest. Now, his heart was thumping hard on his chest. You must’ve grabbed his scarf  by mistake in a rush the last time you visited him and you forgot about it.

And now that left him with your scarf. And he hadn’t noticed at all. His face heated to warm scarlet instantly, the cold air doing nothing to cool it. Ah, this is…..

His grip on the phone tightened as he read your words. Cute. It was hard enough to deal with how much warmth you give him with your scarf, but the thought of you being so tender with him, loving to the point that he can’t take it.

Before he could come up with a reply, another message came through:

“Wait, Megu!… Are you wearing my scarf? 🥺 That’s so cute! Wah!”

He doesn’t know what to do. Everything about his love for you just grows deeper and he can’t help it. His face burned hotter, and he was suddenly hyper-aware of the soft fabric around his neck.

He hesitated, fingers hovering over the keyboard, before typing back:

"I didn’t realize until now. I must’ve grabbed it by accident. Sorry."

Fushiguro Megumi felt like the temperature had risen ten degrees despite the snow swirling around him. He tried to clear his throat, trying to wick away the scarlet blush spreading across his cheeks. But it was no use. He was never going to win against you. Never. 

Your reply came almost instantly, as though you’d been waiting for it.

“Don’t apologize! I think it’s adorable. It’s like you’re carrying a little piece of me with you 🥰.”

"It’s not a big deal." he typed, trying to sound indifferent, but his fingers betrayed him as he hesitated before adding: "It does smell nice, though."

His phone buzzed almost immediately. “You’re so sweet, Megu! You better hurry so I can see you all bundled up in my scarf. I want to take a picture and enjoy the cuteness of my baby!🫶 ”

Fushiguro Megumi let out a soft groan, burying his face in the scarf—your scarf. He takes in the soft smell of your scent, while feeling your words take over him. He could feel the heat radiating from his face as he resumed walking, this time a bit faster. 

He can’t run in this case, not when he’s overwhelmed by this, by you. You’ve ruined him for any other romance. This was it for him. You were it for him. And yet still, he couldn’t believe he was blushing over a scarf. Over you.

But that’s how it is. It didn’t need explanation, it didn’t need logic. That’s how it is to love you. And he wouldn’t have it any other way. Not ever. But still, as much as possible, he still wanted to play it cool.

There was a wonderfully warm feeling in his chest that he couldn’t ignore, not when it’s caused by you. Even if it was accidental, wearing your scarf made him feel closer to you, like he was carrying a part of you with him.

"I’ll be there soon, babe." he texted back simply, though his heart was racing as he hit send.

“I look forward to it! 🫶”

“I'll see you soon.”

“Love you, Megu~”

".....love you too."

══════════════════

IT WASN’T THAT LONG NOW WHEN HE MADE THE SHARP TURN TO AND ARRIVED. The faint glow of the shrine came into view, and quite expectedly, Fushiguro Megumi’s pace quickened even more now despite the biting cold.

His own breath puffed in little warm clouds as he rounded the last corner, and there you were, just like always, waiting for him by the warm illumination of the bright red shrine gates.

You seemed to be humming to yourself as you waited for him, all  bundled up in the white winter coat he gave you and those bright purple gloves trimmed with faux fur you so dearly loved. You hadn’t noticed him yet when he stopped.

But when you did, your eyes widened almost so excitedly. There was a slightly excited bounce in your step as you waved at him enthusiastically, your beautiful face lighting up like the warm spring flowers blossoming when you started to register his presence. Megumi could feel his chest tightened at the sight. 

The stress of trying to get here on time, the hardship of not meeting, the times he missed you — every bit of that started to fade away into nothing. He was here with you. You were here. And nothing can take that away from him, from the two of you. Because he knew it too well. He was home. 

“Megu!” you called out, your tender voice cutting through the quiet winter air.

He slowed as he approached, his usual calm demeanor taking over, but the pink sunrise on his cheeks hadn’t faded. Megumi tried to casually stuff his rather cold hands into his coat’s pockets, pretending the cold was the only reason his face felt warm.

“You’re late, Megu!” you teased, though your tone was playful, and that familiar smile spread across your face.

“Sorry.” he said quietly, stopping just a few feet away. “There was a—”

“A curse?” you finished for him, watching him blink. You grinned. “I figured. You always come anyway.”

He nodded, his gaze flickering to the shrine gates. “I told you to wait here for a reason. It’s safer.”

“I know, I know.” you said, rolling your eyes with a laugh. “I always know that I’m always safe, thanks to you. But I’m also freezing, so I hope you don’t plan to keep me standing here much longer! Let’s eat dinner!”

Your grin widened as your bright doe eyes flicked to the scarf around his neck. “Especially since it looks like you’re nice and warm in my scarf.”

Megumi’s hand immediately went to the fabric, his ears turning red. “I told you, it was an accident.” he muttered, avoiding your gaze.

“And I told you, it’s cute.” you said, stepping closer. 

“You’re wearing my scarf too.” He mutters under the cold winter air. 

You looked down slightly, your cheeks flushing red as you smiled. “Hm! And I love it! It suits me, having a part of you with me always when I’m cold, don’t you think?”

Megumi was taken aback by what you said for a moment. His cheeks turned even redder, even though he wasn’t sure how it was possible. He hums softly, lowering his gaze shyly. “.....It does.”

The soft crunch of snow under your boots was the only sound as you closed the distance between you. You smiled at him as you stopped in front of him. You reached up, on tip toes and gently adjusted your scarf around his neck, your fingers brushing against his skin for just a moment. 

“It suits you, don’t you think?” Your soft voice blossomed against the wind. Your gaze met his, as he raised his face. “Being so loved by me in winter cold too.”

He froze, his heart skipping a beat at the gesture. “You’re—you really are…..” he mumbled, though his voice was quieter, almost fond. “How can you say that so easily?”

“And you’re blushing, lover boy!” you teased, stepping back with a playful laugh. “You also said something like that too!”

“Am not.” he replied quickly, though the redness in his cheeks betrayed him.

“Whatever you say, my precious Megu~” 

You reached out and took his hand, your gloved fingers curling around his as you tugged him toward the shrine gates. You wanted to keep his hand warm from the cold too. He forgot his gloves, after all. And he knew that, his gaze turning to your tender touch on his, even though the leather.

“Come on, let’s get going before we both turn into icicles.”

For a moment, Fushiguro Megumi hesitated, looking down at your hand wrapped tightly on his own. Years together still hasn’t stopped him from being so awestruck by your touch on his.

To hold someone’s hand, it made him feel like he understood what love was like. Ever since that day he met you. You made him understand, with just a touch of your hand. And still, he continues to learn love, because of you. 

Megumi shook his head then he let out a soft sigh, his lips curving into the faintest hint of a smile as he followed you.Even if he’d never admit it aloud, your warmth, your wonder, your very existence, it made him whole.

And if this was a dream, he wishes he never wakes up. Because nothing of him would exist without you. He refuses to do so.

“Hm, let’s go.”

As you walked hand in hand through the snow, Fushiguro Megumi felt like your warmth and his blended together, refusing to part as you made your way away from the shrine. The thought of that made him feel like the winter was nothing, the biting chill rendered powerless against the steady heat of your presence.

It was the kind of moment that made the world feel smaller and quieter.

It was as if the universe had decided to go on a pause just for the two of you.

It was as if these two hands were meant to fit because destiny said so.

This, he thought, was more than enough to ground you both in the stillness of the winter night. The two of you ceased to talk for a while, your breaths forming soft clouds in the frosty air.

Neither of you felt the need to fill the silence. The quiet companionship you shared was enough, an unspoken understanding that words could never quite capture.

It was always like this with you. There was a gentle kind of closeness that didn’t demand anything more than your presence. It wasn’t loud or extravagant, but it was steady.

That was more than enough for him, to keep him grounded in a way nothing else could. Megumi didn’t have to explain himself, didn’t have to rush to fill the gaps, because you already understood. It was just like that between the two of you.

He glanced at you from the corner of his eye, noting the way the soft glow of the blue moonlight reflected off your hair and the peaceful expression on your face. A rare warmth bloomed in his chest, spreading slowly but surely, chasing away whatever lingering shadows had tried to follow him here.

Megumi’s grip on your hand tightened ever so slightly, his way of acknowledging what he couldn’t yet say aloud. This, he thought, was the kind of peace he didn’t know he needed. And for tonight, that was more than enough.

When you both arrived at the train station, the warmth of the moment lingered despite the cold metal benches and the faint whistle of the wind echoing through the platform. The faint hum of distant activity surrounded you, but it all felt muted, like the world had softened its edges just for the two of you.

You both sat down to wait for the train, your hands finally parting as you settled beside each other. Fushiguro Megumi shifted slightly, resting his elbows on his knees and looking out at the empty tracks.

The silence between you was comfortable, but you broke it, your voice cutting through the cold like the first hint of sunlight after a long night.

You looked up at him with a soft smile. “Happy birthday, Megu.”

He froze for a moment, blinking as if he hadn’t quite heard you. Slowly, he turned his head to meet your gaze, his brows furrowing slightly. “What?”

You giggled, the sound warm and light as you looked at his astonished face. “Happy birthday, I said.” you repeated, your smile widening.

His expression softened as realization washed over him. He let out a small, almost imperceptible sigh, his shoulders relaxing just a fraction. He shook his head, as you looked at his most adorable expressions, reserved only for you.

“I forgot, babe.” he admitted quietly, glancing away.

“I know, baby.” you said, your tone teasing but gentle. “You always forget. That’s why I’m here to remind you.”

He didn’t respond right away, his eyes fixed on the tracks ahead. But the faintest hint of a smile tugged at his lips, barely there but unmistakable. He turns his blue–green eyes to you, as though you were the most wondrous thing he’d ever set his blue–green eyes on.

 “Thanks, babe.” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

You reached into your pocket, pulling out a small, neatly wrapped package. You always were better at wrapping presents. You had the best hands in the world, warmest to touch and the most delicate with care. And perhaps that is what made him freeze for a moment. 

“And because I know you’d never ask for anything, I got you this.”

He looked at the gift, his eyes widening slightly. “You didn’t have to—”

“But I wanted to, baby.” you interrupted, holding it out to him. “It’s your birthday, Megu. You deserve to feel special, even if it’s just a little.”

He hesitated before taking the gift from your hands, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment. He stared at it for a few seconds, his expression unreadable, before carefully peeling back the wrapping paper.

Inside was a small, leather keychain engraved with his initials on it. Attached to it was a simple charm shaped like a wolf, a perfect reflection of his shikigami. Megumi stared at it for a moment, his fingers brushing over the smooth leather and the delicate charm. It was clear you’d put thought into this, making sure every detail would suit him.

Everything about it was just to his liking. You always knew it better than him sometimes too. Its design is sleek and understated, free from unnecessary embellishments, yet carrying so much meaning.

It was practical, simple, and deeply personal, just like him. And yet, the simplicity is what made it even more special, just like he knew he was to you.

“You… put a lot of thought into this, babe.” he said softly, his voice tinged with something unspoken, something he wasn’t entirely sure how to express.

You smiled, a faint flush rising to your cheeks. “Of course I did. I wanted it to be something you’d actually use. And… well…. I thought the wolf was a nice touch.”

“It is.” he murmured, his eyes lingering on the charm. 

His shikigami were a part of him, a symbol of his strength and the weight he carried in his cursed technique. But they were something he loved too. Especially his wolves. And now, here it was, captured in this small but significant token by you. Now it meant even more. Because you gave it to him. Now, it was something he could keep with him no matter where he went.

“Do you like it?” you asked, almost shyly.

Megumi looked up at you, and though his expression remained its usual calm, there was a softness in his gaze that made your heart flutter. “I do, babe.” he said simply, but the quiet sincerity in your boyfriend’s voice spoke volumes. “Thank you.”

“I thought it could keep you company, when you’re away.” you said softly, watching him closely. “You’re always busy helping people and running around. You keep doing so much for everyone else. I wanted to give you something you could keep with you, something to remind you…”

He glanced up at you, his blue–green eyes meeting yours. “Remind me of what?”

“That you’re never really alone.” you said simply, your voice filled with quiet sincerity. “That I’m always there for you, Megu.”

For a moment, he didn’t say anything, his fingers tightening slightly around the keychain. Then, almost imperceptibly, he nodded. And for a moment, those rare smiles, the smiles he could only show you. You, his most precious person. That smile had trailed on his lips for a moment.

“Thank you, babe.” he said, his voice steady but laced with something deeper—gratitude, maybe, or something even more profound that he didn’t quite know how to put into words. “I’ll treasure this well, I promise.”

You smiled, leaning back against the bench as the distant sound of the approaching train reached your ears. “Happy birthday, Megu.” you said again, your tone warm and light, your words laced with genuine affection. And then, as naturally as breathing, you added, “I love you.”

The words were simple but carried a weight that made Fushiguro Megumi’s heart stutter. He froze for a moment, wide-eyed, his usual composure shattered like glass under the heat of your confession. He’d always heard you say it over and over again. And yet…..it always made him feel like he was going to drown in your wonders.

He couldn’t help but feel himself combust with your words, the warmth spreading from his chest to his ears, and then outward until he was sure he’d melt into this cold blue winter night. Before he could even begin to stammer out a response, you squeezed his hand, your smile never fading. 

“Our train’s here! We gotta go!”

Your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he blinked, glancing at the train now pulling into the station. You tugged him forward, your fingers laced with his, as if the moment hadn’t just turned his world upside down.

Megumi let out a soft sigh, a mix of exasperation and fondness, as he let you guide him toward the train. His blue–green eyes drifted to the keychain in his hand, its wolf charm catching the dim station light, and then to the scarf around his neck. 

The warmth of your scarf, still carrying your faint, comforting scent. For someone who often felt like the weight of the world rested squarely on his shoulders, tonight felt light. For tonight, everything just felt like a gift. The greatest gift in the world.

The train doors slid open with a gentle hiss, and you both stepped inside, settling into a pair of seats by the window. As the train began to move, Megumi finally found the courage to speak, his voice quieter than usual.

“You’re ridiculous, you know?” he muttered, though there was no bite in his tone.

You tilted your head, looking at him curiously. “What do you mean?”

His cheeks flushed again, and he turned his gaze to the window, watching the snow-covered scenery blur past. “You can’t just… say things like that so casually and just….watch me combust.”

“Oh, you mean when I said I love you?” you replied with a grin, clearly enjoying his reaction.

Megumi groaned, pressing a hand to his temple. “Yes. That.”

You laughed softly, leaning your head on his shoulder. “But it’s true, Megu!” you said, your voice softer now. “I do love you, truly! And I don’t see why I shouldn’t tell you over and over again.”

He was silent for a moment, his heart pounding in his chest as your words settled over him like the softest blanket. Finally, he glanced down at you, his blue–green gaze steady despite the pink still dusting his cheeks.

“…I know.” he said quietly, his voice barely audible. 

And though he didn’t say it back to you, overwhelmed by the wonders of those words on his soul, you knew that look in his eyes. That look of love, that wonder in the blue–green that said those words without leaving his lips.

It was all in his eyes that said everything you needed to hear. He struggles. But he hopes one day, he could say it to you without the struggle. 

You smiled to yourself, your gloves gone. You let your warm fingers still intertwine with his as the train rocked gently beneath you. He squeezed it even more and that had made you smile even more as you looked at him.

You hummed and leaned your head against his shoulder. His breath hitches before a moment later, his head resting on your own. You giggled at that. 

Tonight was perfect, you thought. Just the two of you, wrapped in warmth, as the world outside continued its quiet, snowy journey. And all you could see was the tenderness of all those shades of blue. That’s what it felt like when you were with him.

Everything was worth it. The cold was worth it. And so was the parting and the waiting. As long as you get to be with him and have this feeling of blue. As long as you could see those blues in his eyes.

Everything was worth it. Everything was worth experiencing. And you knew from the depths of his heart that he felt the same way too. Blue was the wonder of being with you. And he loves it too. 

══════════════════

epilogue

Later that night when you reached your house, the warmth of the entryway light spilling into the snowy night, you turned to Megumi with a thoughtful smile. He noticed the way your bright eyes sparkled.

It was a sign you were about to say something that might throw him off. He was familiar with that look since you were in middle school. But every time, he finds himself learning the depths of that mischief in your eyes. 

“So…” you began, glancing up at him with a hint of mischief. “Do you want to stay over tonight?”

Fushiguro Megumi nearly tripped over his own feet. His handsome face turned a shade of red that rivaled the setting sun, and he froze in place, his free hand holding your bag for you. You can see easily that he was clutching it nervously.

“W-What?” he stammered, his voice cracking slightly. “Why—what—why would you even—?”

You couldn’t help but giggle, watching him flounder. “It’s late, Megu!” you said, your tone as calm and reasonable as ever. “The buses aren’t running anymore, and so are the trains, you know! I’d feel bad making you walk all the way back to the dorms in this cold.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but you held up a hand, cutting him off before he could get a word in. You already knew that you had a card up your sleeve. You grinned at him and giggled, taking out your phone from your coat pocket and showing it to him.

“And before you say anything about it being improper or whatever.” you added with a knowing grin, “I already asked Gojo–san if it was okay.”

Megumi’s face somehow turned even redder, and his hand shot to his temple like he was trying to ward off a headache. He looked at your phone for a moment.“You asked Gojo?”

You nodded, looking far too pleased with yourself. “Yup! He said, and I quote, ‘As long as you don’t let Megumi brood in a corner all night, I’m fine with it! Take care of my precious son, daughter in law!��”

Fushiguro Megumi groaned, running a hand down his face. What did Gojo mean precious son? And what did Gojo mean about daughter in law? That was just….

Megumi didn’t know what to do anymore. He can’t even believe Gojo gave his number to you. He couldn’t help but feel his face echo a look of a son embarrassed by his overbearing father. 

“Why would you even tell him that? Now he’s never going to let me live this down.”

You laughed, tugging gently on his hand to lead him inside. “Oh, come on. He didn’t care at all. Besides I had to, he’s your guardian! He said he’d rather you stayed somewhere warm and safe than out in the cold. Besides, it’s not like we haven’t hung out late before. We’d have sleep overs before too.”

“That’s different.” he muttered, still flustered as you closed the door behind him.

“How is it different?” you teased, tilting your head at him.

He hesitated, glancing at you and then away, his ears burning. “It just… is. I just…..”

You rolled your bright doe eyes playfully and reached up to unwrap your scarf—now his own scarf—from around his neck. “Relax, Megu. It’s not a big deal. You can have the couch if it makes you feel better. Or the guest room. I don’t think my mom will mind when she comes back! She loves you too!”

He sighed, letting you take the scarf off but avoiding your gaze. “Fine, fine.” he muttered, his voice barely audible. “I’ll….I’ll sleep here tonight.”

You grinned, your victory clear. “Come on, I think I still have some of your old clothes I took from you. I’m sure they still fit you.”

“You never returned that hoodie I used to like.”

You raised a teasing brow at him. “Do you want it back?”

“No.” He says back to you, and looks at his own scarf on your neck too. “You can keep the scarf too.”

“Good. Now come on, I’ll make some hot chocolate. Consider it a bonus birthday gift.”

As you walked toward the kitchen, Fushiguro Megumi stood there for a moment as he watched you start humming, looking for the cocoa. He let out a quiet sigh, the corner of his mouth twitching upward despite himself. 

He was definitely going to hear about this from Gojo Satoru later, but for now, he couldn’t bring himself to care. He was with you. And that was more than enough for him to not care about the world outside. 

[henry-fox-biggest-stan]

If there’s one thing Casey McQuiston can do is write extra, post-canon, chapters

“God, she's happy. The weather is glorious, people are good, her motorcycle is sexy. It's one of those days when she is just explosively thankful to be alive and in love and gay in New York City.”

“Jane likes Wes a lot. He reminds her of the moody Bushwick boys she used to see at the quieter bars, the ones who only smoked cloves and complained they' d been born a few years too late to be a beatnik. It's the scowl, she thinks, and the air of perpetual malaise. And the mysterious gift for landing the hottest drag queens in the scene.”

“Jane has known she liked girls for a long, long time. Even when she forgot everything else about herself, she remembered English, Cantonese, and being a lesbian. It's never been worth fighting, not for anyone else's sake, but she did sometimes wish things were different. When she watched her dad trudge up the stairs at the end of a long day and into her mom's arms, she'd wished it was posible for her to know that feeling one day, to have a good woman waiting at home.

August is a good woman.”

“She'd always felt happiest and most loved when she was part of something bigger,”

“That night was the first time she ever slept with a woman. She remembers how revelatory it felt, like searching for a word in one language and realizing it only exists in another. Like her whole life she’d had this perfect thing inside her, this thing that had an exact purpose, that would make sense of everything, and she'd been looking for it wrong until that moment.

She wrote: I was on top of her, figuring out how many ways I could make her feel good, and I thought, "I like girls," which is pretty fucking far from groundbreaking for me, but my next thought was, "I love liking girls," and that was a thought i've never had before. I might have fallen a little bit in love with Ann then, the way I think you should fall in love with your first for at least one night. But I completely and permanently fell in love with the way it feels to make love to a woman.”

“The broader she tries to go, the less it's going to feel true. All these small, specific moments, this patchwork of a million faces and voices and hands and street corners and plates of food and songs and fleeting connections—she keeps trying to zoom out of them, but that's where she loses the details. Love is the meal, and love is the ingredients, and love is the whisk and the fire and the order in the window and the reason it came. She can't separate any part from the whole.”

“Life in the future isn't perfect by a longshot, especially not for people like her. There's so much that's still wrong with the world and so many reasons to look over her shoulder every time she walks down the street. But tonight, she's thankful for this. The scrabble forward, the good changes, and always, even now, a basement full of people who'll take her as she came.”

“But the longer she knew August, the longer she loved her, the more she understoad why those girls could never have been for her. Every one of them had only a piece of what she was looking for. A surly disposition here, a pair of glasses there—every girl she’d ever loved for a night or a week or a month had a shadow of August in her.”

“I was standing on a street that felt like home, she wrote, but I didn't have to hide my haircut or change my clothes to save my family from the gossip. It didn’t even matter if any of those aunties had something to say about me. Mom would never know. I loved it.”

“She wants to have the right words, the right attitude, the right gravity to be worthy of what people see in her, but some days she just wants to pick a stupid fight in the grocery store, and some days she wants to do nothing but learn to make a chocolate tart. She's only ever been one person doing what she had to do to survive. Just Biyu, just Jane.”

“Before the Q, Jane never thought she'd be part of any institution recognized by the state, least of all a wedding. Sure, she attended commitment ceremonies in basements and backyards, manned the patio grill while two boys from down the street slow danced under a magnolia tree and the washed-up hippie officiant burned incense to bless their union. Every time, the experience sang hot and sweet in her veins for days after, the way defiant acts of love between her friends always did. But every time, something told her this would never be hers. Probably, she figured, because she never allowed herself to stay with the same girl for more than a month.”

"You started saving for a ring—?"

"Right after I moved in, yeah.”

"If you ask Myla to explain electrical energy." Jane says, winking at the gleam that appears in Myla's eye, "the first thing she'll tell you is that it can't be created or destroyed. Love is like that too. It can be reshaped a million different ways. It can be as big and as impossible to understand as the universe, and it can be as simple as sitting on the other end of the same telephone line, not even saying anything. But in my experience, it'll never be small, and it'll never be short, and it sure as hell won't ever leave you. All it does is find a new place inside you to live, or a new channel to broadcast out of you. It carries you out when the house is falling down. It's the reason why anything good happens, and it's all those good things put together, the picture they make when you step back and really look. Love makes sense of everything. Love makes you real.”

[summerongrand]

I'm so excited you decided to do that ask game! Thanks for the tag! And for your prompt:

Grey/Luna or Chenford (whichever you think fits better) with "That's Christmas To Me"

Thanks for the Christmas Ficlet Ask! Hope you enjoy :)

December 26th, 2024

Lucy hesitates before stepping up to the Greys' front door, balancing a large pot in between her oven mitts. She'd tried to make Luna's favorite dish but couldn't quite get it right, so her grandmother's famous wonton soup it is.

It’s strange to think how much time she’s spent with Wade and Luna since her breakup, but today feels different. No Tim who's on shift, no pressure, just an informal invitation to the Greys' Kwanzaa celebration.

Lucy's not quite sure what to expect. Her experience with Kwanzaa has been limited, even for an Angeleno who's been exposed to every tradition imaginable.

She elbows the doorbell.

“Lucy Chen!” Dominique opens the door, her face lighting up with a bright smile. The smell of mulled wine and the faint sound of Kirk Franklin’s Go Tell It On The Mountain spill out into the crisp night.

Dominique reaches for the pot. “What’d you bring? Something good, I hope.”

Lucy laughs, handing it over. “Wonton soup. My grandma’s famous recipe. They’re a favorite in my family.”

“Wontons are always a favorite,” Nyla says from the kitchen doorway. “James, help them, will you?"

---

Decorations from Christmas still adorn all corners of the Grey residence—twinkling lights on the evergreen tree, garlands on the tree, mantelpiece, staircase, wreaths and candles, large stockings, pieces of wrapping paper—but a kinara now holds the centerpiece on the dining table.

Luna catches Lucy’s curious gaze. She smiles at Wade.

“Kwanzaa keeps the family and faith energy from Christmas going.” Wade says, leaning against the counter.

Luna shoots him a teasing grin. “You say that like you weren’t the one blasting CeCe this morning.”

“I'm an energetic man,” Wade winks at her.

"Don't I know it." Luna leans into her husband.

Dominique sticks out her tongue. "Ewww gag!"

"Did you have a good Christmas?" Angela hands Lucy a glass of mulled wine.

"I did." Lucy smiles her thanks. "My dad, grandma Anna and aunt Amy love Christmas. My mom does too, but not to the extent they do." she gestures around, "Our home looks kinda like this. But with lots of homemade Chinese food and my dad's off-tune renditions of Silent Night in Cantonese."

Wade belly laughs. “Proof or it didn't happen, Detective Chen."

"Let the girl settle down and eat first." Luna tells him. She sticks her fingers in her mouth and whistles, rounding up everybody in the home.

Wesley collects his and Nyla's kids, bringing them over to the dining area.

"Dinner time!" Luna announces.

She lights the first candle of the kinara. “Umoja, the first day of Kwanzaa, means unity—not just within our family but within and across our different communities. Tonight is about lifting each other up in faith, leaning on one another, and finding strength in our togetherness." She holds Wade's hand. "For many in our culture, Kwanzaa is an extension of what Christmas means to us. Now, let us bless this food before us and our time together."

[planetkiimchi]

celebrating lunar new year | x.dj

chinese title: 过年 (guò nián). read the chinese version here!

featuring: childhood friend!xiaojun x hendery’s younger sister!reader (all dialogue is in cantonese)

summary — xiao dejun completely lost contact with you, his first love, when he moved to korea to become a trainee. this year, he's back in china to receive an award, and he sends a red packet to you with your brother as a messenger, with a note inside telling you where to meet him. when you see him again, you realise nothing and everything has changed, all at once.

word count: 1556 words

author's note: happy lunar new year! this is my first time writing a piece in chinese (the piece was originally written in chinese and then translated to english), so if there are any weird grammar quirks please forgive me 🙏 wishing you good health and smooth sailing ahead! 🧧

note 2: also this was based off the tencent entertainment awards but i realised uhh hendery wasn’t there ?? it was winwin all along ?? anyway no way im changing this after writing it so pretend hendery was there instead of ww

if you liked it, REBLOG it.

The door creaks open, and you hear someone carefully locking it, and the sound of shoes shuffling on the floor. It's already midnight, how could there be guests coming over? you wonder. You get out of your bedroom, and see that the "guest" is, as a matter of fact, your beloved brother.

"You're finally home!" you cry out, collapsing into your older brother's arms in unspeakable happiness. Hendery has left China to be an idol for more than eight years now, and besides Lunar New Year, he's usually too busy with work to come home to visit. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, the last time he came back to China was three years ago.

He rubs your back comfortingly, ruffling your hair. "Bet you weren't expecting me, huh?"

You nod. "Did you tell Ba and Ma that you were coming home? If they had known, they definitely would have insisted on fetching you from the airport."

Hendery smiles softly. "Yeah, I knew they'd do that, so I didn't tell them. I was planning to give them a surprise this time."

Watching his familiar expression, you find that you've missed your brother. You've missed his mischievous, laugh-inducing antics, and the times when he's nicer to you as well. You really wish he could stay a little longer.

"Actually..." Hendery hesitates for a bit, and you feel your heart plummet from the top floor of the building as you watch him anxiously. What on earth could have made him come home so suddenly, at such a late hour?

"Actually, I have to leave again quite early tomorrow morning. There's no way I can come with you to visit our relatives. I've been very busy with work lately, and this time, I'm in China to receive an award, not for a holiday. Tell Ba and Ma 'Happy New Year' for me, okay?"

You can't hide your disappointment, and a few tears silently roll down your cheeks.

"Okay," you say, nodding your head determinedly. Hendery has come home, this in itself is a good thing, you tell yourself. Don't cry!

Hendery hugs you tightly. "I'll sleep in the living room tonight. If you don't see me in the morning, you'll know I've left for work."

"Then... when will you come back again?"

"I don't know yet. But I promise I'll come back to visit you as soon as possible, alright?"

You raise your pinky finger. "Promise?"

He nods assuredly, hooking his pinky with yours. "Promise."

—

The next day, you wake up early on purpose. At 3.30 am in the morning, you blink the sleep away from your eyes, slowly sitting up in your bed. Your bedroom is as dark as ink, without a single sliver of light. You hear a sound coming from outside your door, informing you that your brother has just awoken as well. You quickly get dressed, getting out of your room.

Hendery doesn't dare to use the flashlight on his phone to shine light on his luggage as he rummages through it, clearly looking for something.

"What are you looking for?" you ask curiously.

"My toothbrush, of course! What else could I be looking for?"

You sigh in exasperation. "Men." You kneel down next to him, turning his shoulders towards the toilet as you suggest that he goes to change first. At the same time, you'll help him look for his toothbrush, and he can just use the toothpaste you have in your house.

"Sure." With this singular syllable, Hendery takes his clothes to the toilet to get changed.

You roll your eyes, and easily find Hendery’s toothbrush in his luggage. After he’s brushed his teeth, he runs his hand through his hair, smoothing it down. He’s packed his things and is ready to go when his eyes widen, having just remembered something.

“Oh, right, Dejun said to give you this.” Hendery hands you a red packet. “I told him not to, but he insisted, so I have no choice but to give you one as well.” He places yet another red packet on your palm.

“Okay. Please thank him for me.”

“Then… Wishing you good health and success. Take care of yourself, you hear me?”

“You too,” you tell him. It’s always been Hendery that doesn’t sleep enough, yet he’s always the one reminding you to take care of yourself whenever he sees you. Hendery doesn’t know how to take care of himself, but he cares for everyone else without fail.

Once he’s left, you impatiently open the red packet. But what interests you isn’t the sum of money inside it, rather, it’s the note that’s left inside the red packet. Seeing the neat, even script, you immediately recognise it as Dejun’s handwriting. Your name is written on one side of the paper, and there’s writing on the other side.

I’m finally back in China. Missed me? Hendery said he’d give this red packet to you, so I believe today should be the day we’re receiving a prize. I’d like to invite you to come. The address is written below. If anyone asks, probably my manager, tell him I was the one that invited you. See you soon!

You hesitate for a second, but the decision isn’t hard to make. There can’t be any unimaginable consequences, anyway, right?

—

You’ve never known what regret is. Your entire life is built upon decisions you’ve made by yourself, and your brother has always told you not to regret your choices. If you regret something that you’ve done before, then you shouldn’t have done it in the first place. You’ve lived by these words ever since he first said them to you.

But when you see Dejun again after all those years, you think you finally know what the word “regret” entails.

He’s taller than you, and he’s grown more muscular as well. Despite this, his resplendent smile and mellifluous voice hasn’t changed at all. Your name falls from his lips, full of questions, fear buried in the dulcet tones of his voice.

You freeze, staring at him blankly. When you’ve recovered, you smile tentatively, trying to dissipate the tension in the air. “Dejun-kor.”

“Happy New Year,” he offers.

“You too.”

“Long time no see, you’ve changed plenty.”

“Long time no see. You… haven’t changed one bit.” His cheeks flush at your words, eyes lighting up, and he takes two large steps towards you, enveloping you in a warm embrace.

Suddenly, you see Hendery’s silhouette. You push Dejun away, as if scalded by his touch.

“Little fool! What are you doing here?” You cast a frantic glance at Dejun, mouth opening and closing like a fish in water, but no sound escapes your lips. How should you explain this? 

“I asked her to come.” Dejun’s words turn Hendery’s attention from you to himself, and Hendery’s gaze turns from amused to stormy.

He roughly grabs Dejun by the collar. Dejun flails in his grasp, fighting to pry himself from Hendery’s strong grasp. “What are you doing? It’s not like that! I just invited to come watch our awards ceremony. I didn’t do anything to her!”

Hendery’s expression remains upset, steam billowing from his ears, but he lets go of Dejun. He doesn’t even look at you when he asks, “Is he telling the truth?”

“Yes. You shouldn’t make a racket here, there’re too many people around. Why don’t you talk it out without fighting?” You try to suggest.

Hendery takes a deep, long breath. He glares at Dejun, spitting out the words, “Fine. Go on, what were you trying to do?”

“I just wanted to see her again. She may be your sister, but she was—is—also my friend. Since none of us is spending the new year with our family, I wanted to at least spend it with someone aside from just ourselves. Is there anything wrong with me inviting her to come watch us?”

Hendery may be rash and hot-tempered, but he’s not unreasonable. He knows that what Dejun is saying makes sense, so he says nothing, storming off unhappily. Dejun turns towards you with a sheepish look on his face, about to apologise, when you cut him off.

You pat his shoulder comfortingly, saying, “It’s not your fault. Hendery’s just like that.” Before he can respond, you catch sight of Kun’s outstretched hand, and take it, introducing yourself.

“Sorry, we have to rush off. It’s almost our turn to go onstage. See you later!” He says, and you wave at their disappearing backs.

—

When you woke up that morning, you never would have thought that today would go the way that it went. You were so grateful that you were able to meet Xiaojun and Kun, not to mention being able to have a reunion dinner with them. Sitting in front of that table, watching them crack unintentional jokes as they happily ate their food, you found that you enjoyed it very much.

Kun was the first to stand and say goodbye to you, followed by your brother. Dejun was last, holding you close to him as he whispered in your ear. “When I saw that you had come, I felt indescribably happy. If there’s ever a chance, I’d really like to spend another Lunar New Year with you.”

His words rendered you speechless, unable to do anything but tightly hug him, whispering “thank you” over and over again.

if you liked it, REBLOG it.

[lilith-little-world]

Sneak Peek of Chapter 2|| The Isekai’d Oracle

Well, chapter 2 is done, just going to look over it and post it tomorrow. Sorry for taking so long and not being active here. Just been feeling, bleh. The meds I'm taking worked well until it stopped so I have been feeling tired. After updating the story I'm gonna post more here. I just stopped so I can focus on chapter 2 and finish it.

Also thank the season 4 special giving me some motivation and the last push I need to make me finish this. Wukong’s dad bod tho-

“Now this is more like it, Almond!” You said in eagerness, giving a small bowl of shredded meat to your dog. Today was a pain in the ass but at least you’re celebrating with a good meal tonight. A few meat and custard-filled steamed buns with actual soda and alcohol. Lately you have been drinking pure water or sometimes juice. Since they were cheaper. However, after a long week of work and this stressful day, you decided, you’re going to treat yourself. So you turned on the TV to some cable channel that had a Chinese Drama. Unfortunately, it was only in Cantonese, but hey better than nothing. You ain’t complaining. Spider Queen was extremely generous when she gave you an increase of pay. Maybe it was her plan all along to get you to be at…her little ritual.

Maybe you should try and ask around next time. You are going to work for Jin and Yin for a while. They might know something, maybe…

You sat in bed and stare at the TV. Almond’s fur brushed against your leg as she slept next to you. Full from her large meal. The show was entertaining enough, which was saying a lot since you don’t know what’s happening. Only get hints and clues from their expression and atmosphere. It was either this, the news, or educational channels.

From what you gathered, this drama looks old. The resolution was low and blurry. The show follows this priestess around and her weird encounters with demons or trying to be the best priestess she can be. It’s quite cute and funny. Then again, you’re half asleep and drinking alcohol.

“What?! But I thought you need some priestess stuff, why are you running off with that dragon?!” You shout at the screen. “Ugh, come on, you need to be more responsible.” Your words slurred slightly as you mumbled off. Dozing off, staring blankly at the show.

“Be…more responsible…”You mutter quietly. The words echo in your head. Tomorrow, you’re definitely going to organize your thoughts and make a plan on what to do next. You are in the show you been obsessed with for a while now.

Yeah, that’s what you’re going to do, tomorrow. Organize your thoughts, get info, and make a plan on what to do. You’re also going to have fun while doing it. Depending on when you enter this world, you can technically avoid all of the ‘bad events’ that are to come. What is the worse that’s going to happen?

You already worked yourself to death in your old life. There’s no way you’re going to do that in this life. You are going to have fun and enjoy this one.

A chill went down your spine, swearing the room temperature dropping out of nowhere. You put the plate and bowl on your nightstand with your drinks. Turning off the TV, you decided it was the best time to call it a day and rest. Glancing down, you see Almond stir and look at the window tiredly. Her ears were down and was shaking. Due to the dropping temperature or for a completely different reason.

“What’s wrong?” You gently pet her head. She immediately leans into your touch. You glance at the window and try to see what she’s looking at. The blind covers the window but there was no shadow or any indication of anyone outside.

Sighing, you got up and head to the window. Moving the blinds slightly, there was nothing, no one outside. Your hand grazes the freezing glass, making you pull away from the sudden coldness. Your skin tingling and burns from the sensation. As a cold and heavy feeling settling deep within you. Making your head spin.

“What the…”

Almond whines trying to catch your attention but you kept it at the window. You noticed a slight frost at the edges of the window. Again you reach out to touch it, almost as if it was calling for you, but Almond barks. Finally, you turn around to face her.

“What is it?”

“Woof!”

“I hope you do know, I can’t really understand you.”

“Woof, woof!”

“Do you want me to leave the frost alone?”

Almond nods and jumps off the bed. Trying to push you away from the window. Her paws nudges your knee and you took a few steps away from the window. A confused expression is written across your face. Maybe it’s best if you save this for a different day and maybe when you’re not tired.

“Alright, then I'll leave it alone for now. I won't go touching it, calm down.” You pick Almond up and went back to the bed.

“Let’s go to bed, alright? Now stop worrying about me so much, okay?”

You stroke her head and lay the small dog in bed. She was oddly anxious. You had never seen her this worried before.

“It’s fine Almond, just go to bed.”

It didn’t take much for her to go back to sleep. You quietly lay there for a few more minutes. You’re eyes glancing at the window and back to Almond.

A sigh escapes and cover yourself up with the blanket. Almond told you to leave it alone and it’s for the best. Who knows what will happen if you touch it? It looks like Almond does and that’s a good enough reason for you.

“I really hope this doesn’t lead to anything crazy.” You mumbled finally drifting off the sleep. Just wanting this night to end.

[fyeahdprian]

DRWT Hong Kong Q&A

DRWT 2024 Hong Kong Q&A

The Dream Reborn World Tour 2024 Hong Kong | December 22, 2024 | 8pm

Dream Reborn Tour HongKong Q&A

1. Did you guys try some Hong Kong food? If so, what is your favorite?

Cream: My favorite is egg tart, but I haven't tried yet, maybe tonight? lan: I like roast goose. I like roast duck but when I came to Hong Kong I tried roast goose the first time, and I think it's more oily but tastes better. Fans: You can add chamoy on it! lan: Really? You put chamoy on it? I though it is a Mexican thing lol Artic: I like dim sum.

2. What animal are you most afraid of?

Cream: cockroach Eddie: I guess they are animals. We will count that as animals. lan: (thinking…) | have a fear with turkey. Trauma. When I was 5 years old, a small boy, you know the zoo? They have turkeys and they put the kids into the turkey pen, like this(pointing down the stage). My mom dropped me into the pen, and its the first time I saw turkey as big as me, and it chased me for 30 minutes, it was traumatizing lol. Artic: (Eddie translate) He doesn't have one but if he had one it would be monkeys. When he went to the zoo one time a monkey rushed at him.

3. What is your favorite position to take a photo?

Cream: 🖕😎🖕 lan: For me maybe this? (Leaning forward, one hand covering his cheek) Eddie: what about you Artic? lan: Artic same expression every time Artic: (sitting still thinking) lan: this is it by the way Artic: maybe 😎 ✌️ lan: I never seen you do this!

4. What is the best Hong Kong movie you have ever seen?

Cream: Chungking Express lan: I like Fallen Angels, that's a good setting for HongKong. And Kung Fu Hustle Artic: Chungking Express

5. Have you guys ever learned some Cantonese slangs?

lan: My friend told me one, a really bad one, so I can't say it. I'll get in trouble so l cannot say this. (Fans teaching them "I love you" in cantonese) Eddie: Artic is asking if anyone could teach him a BAD slang word (Fans teaching them "I miss you" in cantonese) lan: teach us another one (Fans teaching them "I love you so much" in cantonese) lan: My best friend is from HK, yeah Ronald, but he never teaches me, he only teach me bad words, and when I ask him what does it mean he just say it means "hello"

6. If you could only have one instrument to express all your emotions and ideas, which would it be?

Cream: For me, definitely piano. I can play guitar, but if only one, it would be piano lan: I think my voice. Yeah you can express anything you want, you can swear, you can sing Artic: Drum Cream: He's a really good drummer Fans: Show us! Artic: (Eddie Translate) He said he will show you guys very soon. A (new) album maybe?

7. Have your guys ever felt that you were running out of inspiration or creativity in your work? If yes, how do you guys deal with it?

Cream: (Eddie translate) He doesn't only work when inspiration comes to him, he just constantly works. lan: What happens when you lose inspiration? I have to do something new to fill the tank. You can't have new inspiration if you do the same thing everyday. Because the tank is filled with your knowledge and information, but if I go from home, studio, home, studio, what new information do I have? So of course I'm gonna burn out, of course l'm not gonna be inspired. You have to do something you never done before. Doesn't mean you have to go out and, you know, you could always do things by yourself, go watch a movie by yourself, go out and fly a kite, eat some roast goose. Everything serves as a memory, and that memory becomes inspiration. Artic: (Eddie translate) He likes to travel and go to a new environment when there's no one and try to work on his projects there.

By: @dprchocobrownie

[enginire]

snowpiercer prompts. episode 1 - 3.

you're gonna have to hide.

it's going to be okay.

be prepared to brace.

we'll do the best with what we've got, alright?

you want to take care of the food?

you really think i can be an engineer?

never forget who you are.

with all due respect, we've heard it before, and this doesn't exactly fill the belly.

if we don't do something soon, it's gonna be too late.

i don't think you've got the guts to stand with us.

you can question my plan if you want, but you question my fight, and we've got a serious problem.

we do this now before they toss us again and find the weapon.

we need to think long-term about this.

there is no long-term if we're too old and sick to fight.

you're not allowed to have better cantonese than me.

there's more violence, i heard.

alright, well. bad news travels fast.

you know you love an excuse to wear your fur.

what do you want with me?!

we've had a murder.

i guess he didn't think rich people would murder each other.

we've got a body.

if anyone can get back to us, it's him.

i think they cut him up into pieces to hide him better.

this is your chance. take it.

why would you want to go back there?

my department's responsible for smooth relations.

doors will open wherever your investigation leads you.

you want justice? clear her.

get these two out of here, i'll start with her.

give us a minute alone, or this is as far as i go.

you told them i was a cop?!

you were the only person i could think of to help.

you really pulled out all the stops, huh?

how did it go with the suspects?

there is way more to this than you're saying. otherwise, why would you be so desperate for my help?

a murder could upset the entire ecosystem. it's complex.

i thought the boss could use some comfort food tonight, and i bet you can use a drink.

we locked up the wrong person.

once this murder is solved, the other work can continue.

we stick to the script. we finish what we started.

we've got to remove the body.

nothing like mountain weather to agitate everyone further.

just what this day was missing… another corpse.

they're killing each other up there.

i think i've got a way we get out of this alive.

there's to be no more loss of live.

you have a rough day stewarding the future of humanity?

it's gonna be bumpy tomorrow.

the only reason we're here is we refused to die in the first place.

do you think i want to be here?

finally! someone with the moral fortitude to take responsibility for their actions!

they keep trying to take our dignity, but any survivor will tell you they check their dignity at death's door.

the more they steal from us, the more human we become.

you were in it to save your buddies. i don't owe you a thing.

you two are gonna have a great day.

your people killed their friends. i don't think you realise how unpopular you are.

security forces don't grow on trees.

i'd be happy to share insights if you share details of the investigation.

i'm trying to assess how far you can move a body.

it's her lips to god's ear, isn't it?

we offer epiphanies.

i'm not gonna let them pin this murder on you.

would it be so terrible if you stayed up here?

sometimes detective work requires a personal touch.

just to be clear, i've never done an autopsy before.

you're not saying this is cannibalism.

one gang in particular - they would kill anyone, eat anyone. had no choice.

we need to look in your freezer.

bet you could cut my leg off with that.

brace for impact!

we need to know if it's structurally sound.

is this what the start of a resource crash feels like?

i know. it's bad. but how bad stays between us.

if you're gonna retail him for meat, then why the torture?

he puts arms and legs in my fricking noodles.

there's no use in getting us both shitkicked.

you still care about getting the right guy?

we need every department. we need friends high and low. you see?

i swear to you, i will not stop fighting.

we're still in motion, alive and kicking, and it's not thanks to chance, or fate, or god.

you've got killers and cannibals and god knows what else up here. so don't lecture me about balance.

you'd think loneliness would be impossible all crammed in here, but this place was designed to separate us from our possessions, from our loved ones. now every last shred of us is worth something to someone.

everything's rare, so you've gotta pay with something personal.

we held onto these for a long time, but they're worth more as a commodity. to trade if you get into trouble.

by your steady hand, we will ride out this hardship and outlive the ice, bound by our cause and our need.

tell them there's unrest brewing.

let me explain clearly. we each have our place up here, our lane. and until you earn his trust, your lane is narrow.

authoritarian states usually control their own drug trades.

well, look at you, detective. already working on the case.

you should see me without the handcuffs.

false imprisonment? a cannibal ring right under my nose? it's embarrassing.

and i can't even find my underwear!

i can't wait to slap him with this.

you're at an impasse with this case. so today, i'm shaking the hell out of this tree to make something fall out.

you know how the underground works.

i see you, with your surprise casino and your roman games. you're just misdirecting us from an extinction event.

god, i wish i were welding.

i'm gonna have to ask you to leave.

well, hopefully now we can focus on our next steps.

kinda everywhere, isn't she?

i'll keep doing what i do best, and you keep doing what you do best: survive.

we're gonna get a lot more information out of her if i go alone.

i can ask if he'll meet with you.

twice in one day, i'm stuck dealing with you.

you're just pissing him off.

so you go out there, and you tell him that i've got eyes on me too.

you think i don't have more dirt on you?

me and your boss? we're getting pretty close. i could probably just make some shit up.

that shit's poison. you should be ashamed of yourself.

you don't want that kind of publicity.

if i give him something about this murder, he'll probably forget about the whole thing.

it was a great success, despite a riot breaking out - maybe even because of it.

well, i'll put the riot to bed, you put them to bed.

this whole time, i've not been seeing what was right in front of my eyes.

you don't remember me, do you? but you do know who i am.

[nihyunluvskookie]

shēngrì kuàilè wǒ dí àirén

“Mingyu one shot”

Pairing: Kim Mingyu x female reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: no mentions since it's a fluff

Word count: 1.6K

Author’s Note: Happy Birthday best person to ever exist!! @aestheticfangirl Sending you love and hugs, although I wish I was there to wish you face to face, and I tried writing something different so I hope you’ll like this, and telling just in case you get confused, I used Mandarin, because they speak Cantonese or Mandarin in Taiwan and shēngrì kuàilè wǒ dí àirén means happy birthday my love

happy reading <3 ily sm 💗

I looked at the date and I sighed, it counted my first month here in Taiwan. I looked at my phone, I wonder what he is doing right now, I missed him. It’s been a month since I last saw him and it’s been three days since I heard his voice. I was a bit busy with assignments and he was busy with his work.

I wonder if he’s taking care of himself or not. I shut down my Mac and went to bed, holding my phone; it’s like I missed a bit more today even though I don’t know why. For the last month, it took me a bit of time to settle down here, and since it was the first time for me to study out of the country. I made few friends, but there was always a lingering feeling which I don’t understand. Being in a long-distance relationship now, I remember crying when I first came because I missed him, his warmth which always made me feel home. Coming back to his arms, after a tired day was the best feeling ever but I can’t even do that. And coming here and getting busy with my papers and thesis, I don’t even get proper time to do anything else, it’s like a commitment I have with my Ph.D. degree, I have to do well no matter what but I was failing in time management.

The urge to call him and hear his voice was strong but then I looked at the time, it’s already past midnight here; so it was almost past 1 am there, I kept my phone on the nightstand and lay on my bed.

I tried to close my eyes and started thinking about him. I remember how excited I was when I told him I got accepted into National Taiwan University and I’ll be doing my Ph.D there, both of us were happy until that night I heard him telling Wonwoo, that I’ll be leaving soon.

‘I’m gonna miss her so much, what do I do’ I went to him and hugged him tight from back. I didn’t want to show the acceptance letter as soon as I got, because I needed some time to think about it and decide how to break this news to him because although I was excited but I was sad that he won’t be with me these years by my side.

‘Mingyu…’

‘I’ll call you later hyung’ and he turned to look at me, ‘Aki’ and he kissed my forehead

I hugged him tight, hearing his heartbeat as if it was the music for my heart. ‘I will miss you so much, but I am so proud of you. You always make me proud for who you are’

‘Mingyu… I’ll be back soon’ I lifted my face to look at him, the moonlight falling on his face and making him look breathtaking. ‘This is going to be tough but we can do this’ he nodded and cupped my face and gave me the softest kiss ever.

Tears started falling and I realized I was crying, I missed him so much right now. Wish he was here tonight, just to hold me and give me the warmth I needed. Another memory flooded in when I started thinking about ‘us’

‘Aki look here’ and I turned around just to see him holding his camera, ‘did you click pictures?’

‘Yes, I clicked pictures of my pretty girlfriend, who looks lovely in this yellow summer dress.’

‘Mingyu…’ and when I started taking steps towards him, he started taking his steps back; it was enough for me to understand that he was going to run and I have to catch him. the smile he had on his face at that time, no one could understand how much peace it gave to me, how much I wanted to treasure his smile at that time, even pictures can’t do justice to that smile.

I missed him so much, he didn’t even text me goodnight tonight, I wonder how his day was today because today we hardly exchanged two texts not more than that. Wish I could go and check on him, whenever I am busy or he is busy we just meet each other or wait for each other after making dinner.

Thinking about dinner, how much I miss watching him cook dinner for us sometimes.

At times, I hate staying awake past midnight because of these overwhelming thoughts I get about him. past one month was difficult for me, he was checking up on me, almost every day but I couldn’t tell him everything in details because he might get worried, that’s why I tried to make him believe and understand that I am doing well, but how can I be totally okay when sometimes I just wish him to be here and miss him so much that at times I end up crying.

My tears were making my pillow wet. I tried wiping my tears but how do I stop them now?

I was about to get up and switch off the lights, so that I could try to sleep but as soon as I got up from my bed, I heard my door bell ring. I looked at the wall clock, it was already 1 am and why would someone be here ringing my door bell at this time. I wiped my face first, trying to look normal, I looked at the mirror once before walking towards the door. I was hesitating to open the door but knowing this was the safest neighborhood and full of students, I was still unsure then the bell rang for the second time.

I took a deep breath and said “shuí zài nàér?” (who’s there?) while opening my apartment door, and the moment I looked at the person, I gasped hard. Because I couldn’t believe, “Happy Birthday my love” I felt like I was hallucinating right now, “shēngrì kuàilè wǒ dí àirén” (happy birthday my love)

I hugged him tight although his two hands were full, I couldn’t believe anything, “Mingyu” it felt forever since I called him, and my tears started falling, “I'm here now” I didn’t say anything anymore. I let go of him after calming myself down, he looked at me, and his eyes told me everything. I smiled at him and wiped my tears.

“Let’s go inside, sorry to keep you here for so long” and held his hand; I closed the door behind us, and the moment I turned around Mingyu’s lips met mine,  I was surprised by this act.

His hand went to my cheeks and other hand went to my waist, he pulled me closer and I could feel the longing in the kiss. “I missed you so much” he said in between kisses and started caressing my cheeks. “I couldn’t wait to surprise you on your birthday” I got emotional and was about to cry and saw him pulling back from the kiss. He cupped my face, “were you crying?” his thumbs were on my face, telling me to calm and it’s okay. I nodded slowly.

I was about to speak but he kissed me again, this time he kissed me until we were out of breath.

“I’m here now and once again happy birthday” he said and kissed my forehead.

I smiled looking at him, I was missing him so much that I didn’t even remember that it was already midnight and it was my birthday.

“Now, come make a wish and let's celebrate your birthday” he held my hand and pulled me towards him, and he gave me the bouquet which was on the couch now. “This is for you, my flower.”

I hugged him tight, not wanting to let go of him, “Let me show you the cake atleast!” I laughed a little, it was the true laugh I let out since past one month. We were standing near the table, and he opened the package and showed me the cake, he also lit the candles.

“Now make a wish”

‘I want to be yours forever’ I said in my mind and blew out the candles. “Thank you so much Mingyu” Before I could say anything else, it hit me, that he was here sitting beside me.

“BUT WHEN DID YOU COME?”

“We can talk about it later love” he kissed me again, “I missed kissing you” and he kissed me again, my hands went to his shoulder automatically, feeling him against my body. Our forehead touched after we were out of breath, “You have no idea how much I missed you, although it was one month but felt like years to me, wish I could tell you how much this distance was killing me. wish you were somewhere near and I could just drive to you and see you whenever I missed you.” his breaths were hitting my face, I felt alive again, felt like I got my reason to smile again.

He took a step back, and I looked at him, taking something out from his pocket. It was a red velvet box, I was looking at him the whole time and then he opened the box, it was a pendant.

“Your birthday gift”

“Mingyu….” I hugged him so tight; I couldn’t help it. This whole surprise was making me so weak, him flying all over to Taipei to meet me and celebrate my birthday was already overwhelming and now giving me the pendant, which was his birth flower, Adonis.

“Stay here and complete your studies because after that I’m not letting you go alone anywhere I’ll go wherever you go”

“I love you” I lifted my head to look at him and smiled, "I love you too" and kissed me.

It was the best birthday ever.

[personaldairyentriesarchive]

Tuesday, May 31, 2022

09:24

When I woke up in the morning my right eye was feeling funny again, used some eye drop and the whole trip to work was a torment. I feel better now. The traffic was crowded and i almost crush into people for a few times. After i arrive and had coffee and opening the shop, i saw an article on WeChat moment about the movie Farewell My Concubine, it was talking about its filming process, about how crazy and nuts it is and i need to say that is one of my favourite movie of all time and i need to shot one like that one day, probably about how Devon coping with Mina’s death (she can’t and will kill her self). The article was really good it has many behind the scenes research in it. I sent it to mom, she said it was good but soon changed the subject to the neighbourhood bull dog’s seizure attack, the owner says possible cause by brain inflammation or whatever that disease is called, the owner is still processing the bad news and she called my mom crying last night because the dog had another seizure attack, she want to give the dog medication for a week and if he turns out fine she will continue the treatment, but if not she needs to take the dog to have a MRI. Mom says she can’t immediately dump all the information to the owner because mom doesn’t want to take the responsibilities of misinforming and does want to give the owner too much pressure. Which i can understand and respect.

09:35

The bull dog owner is very affective by how others perceive her. Once she took the dog to underground parking lot for a stroll because of the summer heat, some neighbour saw them and quads like “why are you walking the dog here its sunny outside!”, and now she takes the dog for a walk five in the morning because its cool outside. Mom’s comment: “what’s more important? 66’s well-being or others comments?”

09:51

Mom told me to tell dad and mr wang to restock milk, she said just report the number and don’t make any decision. She will visit 66(the bull dog) and his family tonight when I’m at home with Dave.

12:39

heating up food at the moment. Lunch: chicken steak and squash.

16:18

It looks like its gonna rain. I couldn’t finish the lunch. A guy asked for direction of washroom and i told him and lend him the key card but the receptionist tells me that we are forbids to do that. Later he bought a cup of latte. I read 2666 for a while and felt got the morb. I’m sweating. I had my second cup of coffee. After a few minutes a woman in white shirt came by, asked if cappuccino is 23 yuan, i said yes and she tried to order 6 cups of them but later changed her. Ind because the cups we are using are not suitable for her situation, where she wants to give them to her clients. I was scrolling through cptsd memes and i realized that when I first had penetrative masturbation I didn’t bleed or feel pain, it was weird and i talked about this to darling. Later i made a copy pasta about wanting to have sex with vulpes. It got no upvote but downvotes. I now just had my second lunch and wasn’t able to finish it, tried to open a bottle of soda and it made a deafening sound. I was startled. I sit on the step to the display refrigerator for a while and being tired and exhausted for no reasons, I’m forcing myself to write this diary. The chicken steak was too salty

16:29

A woman and her companion is complaining really loudly in the cafe area.

16:34

I realize the complaining woman is the other receptionist, the fat one.

21:15

I just had shower and finished my skin care routine. Tonight we had Cantonese bbq pork, tofu and mushroom stew, fungus I don’t know the name of with vinegar, and stir fry bok-cho for dinner. Before dinner I watched serial experiment lain for a while. Dad is happy today and I organized my earring and stuff after dinner, then took a walk.

[imamxdel]

[ LANGUAGE ] : sender begins to speak seductively and fluently with the receiver in another language. [ Daehyun -> Harper ]

sensual tension \\ @dencesin

Once Harper started talking in another language, it was difficult for her to go back to another without having to actively think about what she wanted to say. She'd spent too much of her life living in different countries and between different native speaking parents that sometimes her brain got too confused.

She'd been in Korea long enough that she'd defaulted back to speaking it all the time other than the times she spoke with Mother on the phone who preferred speaking in Cantonese when it was just the two of them.

All it took was one phone interview with an American agency for her to revert back to English, and though she spoke it fluently with little to no accent, her poor mind was too confused to go back to Korean right away.

And her poor boyfriend. Her mix of English and Korean must have confused him, and by the time they were both in bed and starting to make out, a sure signal they'd start practicing after he'd had a long day at work and needed to let off some steam, Harper turned her head and sighed.

"I'm sorry," she said, words in English she knew he could understand. "I just...might not say..." Her cheeks tinted pink. "...I don't think I can speak in Korean tonight..."

The words were caught up in already heated kisses, Harper started to paw at the stupid shirt he'd worn to bed and separating to tug it off over his head and toss it somewhere on the floor. She still didn't know why he wore shirts to bed when they ended up taking them off anyways, and sometimes wondered if he liked the foreplay of it.

As Daehyun started to kiss down her body, Harper gasped and mumbled out incoherent words, trying not to speak at all. "Feels good," she whispered without realizing it, chewing on her bottom lip to stop herself from talking and saying something silly in English.

"You like it when I do that, don't you?"

"What!" Harper sat straight up, unintentionally pushing Daehyun up as well and staring at him with a deeper shade of red across her face. "Oppa, you don't have to...if you're not comfortable...talking like that," she said, worried about pushing him in to an uncomfortable moment where he'd have to focus on speaking English instead of doing what both of them wanted, because Harper was starting to feel more heat grow between her thighs.

"I want to feel how wet you are. Spread your legs for me."

"...what?" she said again, melting in to a pool of lust and getting more flustered than she usually did when he teased her. Harper began to feel that new kind of excitement at discovering a new kink she didn't know existed.

"I said, spread your legs for me. Be a good girl and show me how wet you are."

Letting out a desperate whine, Harper fell back on the pillows and covered her face as she pushed her legs apart as he pushed her knees to her sides, slotting himself between them.

"You're so fucking pretty..."

"Oh my god..." Harper felt like she'd come untouched if he kept talking to her like that. "Oppa...please keep talking like that," she begged, her new kink unlocked. They'd have to add this to the ever growing list of things they liked trying together.

[justinefrischmanngf]

for someone who wants to learn so many languages i sure dont put in the effort to learn those languages….

[ezlebe]

If you ever want another request- I thought the bit where Greg is on E in “pins and needles” was pretty fun, I’d love to see more clingy Greg and either disgruntled or entertained Tom depending on the situation

“Why’re you always doing that?”

Tom looks over while furrowing his brow, then glances around before landing back on Greg with a frown. “What?”

“Touching me,” Greg says, dropping his head and peeking down with a fan of lashes against his cheeks to where Tom’s hand is set at his elbow. “See.”

Tom stares too, for a beat, then pulls his hand away with a jerk, consciously taking the other off his hip, and shoves both into his trouser pockets.

“No one else touches me,” Greg says, exhaling a brief, quiet hum while tipping his head back to look at the sparkly ceiling above them. “Except you.”

“They do so,” Tom says, though he can’t really think of a particular instance, not recently, and he twists his fingers into fists in his pockets. “That’s just the E talking.”

“MDMA,” Greg says, quite haughty, but he’s half grinning, too, standing up straighter and squaring his shoulders against the wall that he’s balanced himself on. “It’s actually, like… um.” He breaks into a breathy laugh. “Oh, E is for ecstasy.”

“Such a quick mind, over here – best alert MENSA,” Tom mocks, glancing over when the elevator opens with an almost annoyingly pleasant hum. He steps inside, jerking his chin, and ignores an impulse to more physically grab Greg to pull him in behind him. “Where did you even get it? And you know people dance on it, grind on the floor like horn-dogs, not become big annoying bees that buzz around killing the vibe.”

“It was one of Lukas’ friends, and I, like – I didn’t kill it, Tom,” Greg says, folding himself up and crowding far closer to Tom than the wide car really requires of him. “You said I should – We should leave the casino, so your, um – the so-called vibe was, in fact, entirely self-immolated.”

Tom rolls his eyes, as he pushes the button for the seventeenth floor. It was, perhaps, but only because Greg hovered and interrupted every other statement for a good hour while Tom tried in utter vain to concentrate on speaking rusty Cantonese to a trio of marketers who’s names he cannot recall, even now, but who he met last time he was in Macau. He had been attempting to network in a way that didn’t involve the now-usual mutually assured destruction, so of course his unofficial deputy had somehow found him, among the stirring crowd in tonight’s casino venue of Lukas’ absolutely biased choice, in a low lit corner booth while bumbling and giggly on goddamned E.

The marketers had then consistently referred to Greg as something of a circus act, as far as Tom could translate, and largely because of his height, which hadn’t helped Tom’s mood all that much. He’s not going to admit it, though; at least, not until Greg is sober enough to realize they were even talking about him.

Tom glances down with a start, as Greg’s fingers trail along his arm, flicking at his cuff links and tracing the seam of the sleeve. He looks back to the numbers, spinning up the elevator display, and offers a quiet tut. “You touch, too, Greg.”

“Yeah,” Greg breathes, looking over with one of the wide grins he’s been offering since he popped up at the booth, actually leaning in closer while his long fingers dance up Tom’s arm. “My mom has this friend, like… She would, I think, say you’ve got a good aura.”

Tom raises a brow, as the elevator slows at the selected floor. “That seems highly unbelievable, Gregory. Considering.”

Greg snorts and falls into a wheezy giggle. “Yeah, maybe? It’s just, um... interesting, then? Or maybe only good to me – do you think I have a good aura?”

Tom glances sidelong, as he steps out, feeling a smirk play at the edge of his lips. “Are you serious – you want me to name a color, or something?”

“No, no, it’s like a…” Greg rolls his eyes, as he snickers, rolling his head back and forth along his shoulders. “A sense you get around a person. I guess. Like all my cousins are sort of, like… uncomfortably tacky and sort of car, um – carcinogenic, like fresh road tar, you know, except like Connor, who is more… a-a sticky hand covered in hair.”

“A truly visceral image,” Tom says, peeking at numbers on doors and trying to find the one that had been written on Greg’s keycard holder earlier that day. “So what am I?”

“Oh, um…” Greg hums, then breaks out into a breathy set of unfairly devastating giggles, as he slants hard into Tom’s side. “Gaudy Christmas sweater?”

“Ugly Christmas sweater?” Tom corrects, pointblank, coming to a pause at a door and then looking over at Greg, hesitating a pair of seconds, then reaching out to pat at his jacket. He finds a phone on the inside pocket, yanking it out with a wag in Greg’s face. “Do you even wear those?”

“Not really, but, uh…” Greg pinches his lips together, watching Tom slide the keycard from the back. “I don’t think they’re really, um… that religious? Are they?” He shrugs, looking back up with a lean forward into Tom’s space. “But they’re like warm, and goofy, and… a little itchy.”

“I’m going to find you a really ugly not-Christmassy one, Gregory,” Tom says, flatly, sliding the card into the door with a hard shake of his head; it blips green, thank fuck. “Cheapest wool on the market, feels like the steel kind, and make you wear it.”

“See!” Greg says, overly cheerful at the threat, grabbing high on the back of Tom’s arm to shake him with a pitchy hum. “That’s my – like, totally my point.”

Tom goes for the mini fridge across the room and pulls out an equally mini water, then turns around just in time to take in with a wide blink that Greg is already stripping down. He watches Greg’s long, pasty legs kick off his trousers to settle and wrinkle in a gray puddle on the floor, then sets the water on the bedside table with a flat press of his lips – a dissatisfied moue that just deepens when the jacket joins them.

“Greg, for shits’ sake,” Tom says, rubbing at the inside of one of his brows and concentrating more on the laziness rather than the G-rated nakedness. “You’re not in your own penthouse hovel – pick that up.”

Greg grumbles low and rolls his eyes hard, and he slips into brief, incredulous giggles halfway through, but his suit, somehow, gets largely shaken out and laid across the back of a chair. He forgets to take off his button up, though, or maybe he likes the feel of it, picking up the bottle next to Tom with a contented hum.

“Alright, in you go,” Tom says, throwing the bedclothes and pointing aggressively at the white sheets starched and stretched across the mattress. “I’ll collect you tomorrow for some hungover breakfast and you can tell to me all you got up to tonight that didn’t involve taking candy from strangers. Deal?”

Greg pauses with the bottle, now half-empty, set distractingly on his lower lip. He blinks widely, dropping the bottle while his tongue peek between his lips. “Are you, like… going back downstairs?”

Tom shakes his head, gesturing wider and more emphatically at the bed, until Greg starts to move. He plucks the water from his hands, narrowly saving Greg from spilling it down his front. “I’ve got my own chemical gambling to sleep off, though it’s mostly liquor.”

“So, he-hey, then…” Greg says, an odd grin on his face, as he reaches up grabs at the line of buttons on Tom’s shirt with a wide blink. “Wait.”

“Scared of the dark?” Tom taunts, patting condescendingly around the bony knuckles of Greg’s hand. “The hotel is so new, the only ghosts are of the people who died building it. You’ll be alright.”

He reaches out for the corner of the comforter, as the hand releases him, and doesn’t expect at all for Greg to lurch up from the mattress, let alone kiss him hard. He responds more rashly than rationally, gasping and pressing back while grabbing Greg’s face, as a thousand imagined moments rear from the back of his mind. He gets lost in the kiss for heated seconds, mouth sliding against Greg’s, until he comes back to his senses all at once when Greg’s fingers, again, tug the buttons at his shirt. He shoves away with a harsh breath, quickly shaking his head and holding Greg back from following him .

“Tom?” Greg says, plaintive, brows framing concern around his eyes.

“Look, Greg…” Tom pauses to swallow hard, sweeping his thumb along Greg’s cheek, trespassing and selfish, then forces his hands to drop and grab Greg’s to let go of him. “I get it, you’re so horny you might as well be called Billy and figure I’m up for it, but this would – it might… fuck, ruin me.”

“Ruin you?” Greg repeats, bemused, hands curling into his own chest.

“Just being the closest warm body,” Tom mutters, exhaling a broken laugh while scrubbing at his face. He stands and steps backward, cursing everything he drank, keeping up with the marketers, though really he isn’t sure he’s even past tipsy. “Here’s hoping you’re somehow fucked up enough you won’t remember even trying that.”

Greg’s eyes dart back and forth across Tom’s face, as he slumps into the pillow.

Tom manages to grab the comforter uninterrupted and starts yanking it over Greg, who actually startles at the movement, glancing widely and watching the corner cross his body. “Lay there until you’re off in fucking Oz, buddy. The sheets are nice – that E’s got to make it feel like you’re resting on the prized cushions of a sultan.”

“Um, except…” Greg mumbles, hunching while he grabs the blanket now at his chin. “Tom?”

Tom ignores the implied question and hastily crosses the room, flicking the light off with a heavy smack on the wall. He stays there for a pair of heavy breaths, closing his eyes with a hard swallow, and contemplates fleeing the room entirely, but instead quickly finds himself in the aggressively white-tiled bathroom with a clumsy slide of the pocket door. He inhales deep through his nose, but the exhale falters, and he covers his face with both hands while he tries desperately to make his breathing slow and measured, rather than falling into a humiliating fucking fit.

It doesn’t… What does it matter that Greg kissed him? His head is so stuffed with molly-flavored cotton that he’d have kissed a turnip-headed scarecrow in the same position. It’s not as if – He wouldn’t kiss Tom, if all his marbles were in place, is the broad fact of it.

It really doesn’t even matter.

Or, it shouldn’t, but it does, because Tom wants Greg to want him so bad that a permanent ache has set up under his sternum, and he just accidentally confirmed that Greg might consider him, but it’s when out of his fucking mind. He finally, actually got to kiss Greg, and, yeah, it didn’t even matter, turning it into some ouroboros of collectively no real fucking meaning.

Tom claws his hands across his eyes and accidentally sizes up himself in the mirror, sees his eyes glassy and cheeks splotchy, and barely manages to look away, slapping at the light switch, in time before a choke catches at the back of his throat. He covers his mouth, squeezing his eyes shut, and wills himself, to no avail, to cowboy up or what the fuck ever, rather than fall to pieces in a hotel bathroom. It doesn’t work – it never does, once he’s sunk to this point.

“Tom – ?”

No, fuck. It’s the worst thing that could happen and that’s exactly why Tom is unsurprised that it did.

The bathroom door slides open wider, at a soft thud of knuckles against the panel. “Tommy, are you crying?”

“No, fuck off,” Tom snaps, turning his back to the door and to Greg, scrubbing the best he can at his face, despite the dark, though it doesn’t do a lot for the nasally, croaking quality of his voice. “You’re supposed to be going the fuck to sleep.”

“You are…?” Greg says, fingertips grazing across Tom’s back.

“I’m not,” Tom insists, harshly, as he’s quickly forced into a corner. He tenses up and almost shoves Greg, but the instinct to hide is, for once, stronger, and he gives up wiping at his face to just keep his hands over his eyes. “I’m not.”

“Are you hurt?” Greg says, speaking with careful, earnest concern.

Tom chokes on a laugh mixed with another wet gasp. “No, I - I’m fine, you’re just so fucking high that you’re hallucinating shit.”

Greg touches his shoulder again and Tom flinches, turning around and nearly falling backward into the tub, but Greg easily catches him with his stupid orangutan arms and makes it all worse with a bear hug. If there’s any sort of luck in the world, between the hour and the booze and the drugs, he’ll forget this like a dream.

Tom can’t help but let himself slump at the thought.

“Are you hurt?” Greg asks, again, while his nose digs hard into the side of Tom’s head.

Tom takes one heaving breath after another, giving in and pressing his face fully into Greg’s ugly silk shirt, and shakes his head. “No, buddy,” he lies, voice badly catching in his throat. “I’m… fucking peachy.”

“Are you sure?” Greg asks, painfully sincere in his ear.

“You need...” Tom takes an uneven breath, deciding to forgo another lie, and weakly, awkwardly flapping to press his hands against Greg’s side. “To go to bed. You’re out of your mind… imagining things.”

Greg mumbles a low response, unintelligible but somehow stern, still clutching at Tom despite the attempted jostling; his arms are clasped around Tom to keep him from really moving, like he’s some sort of fussy child. “You, um – you should lay down, too. Okay?”

Tom sighs through his nose. He does, really, feel a bit better, but it’s also in that way just makes him feel even worse in a deeper sense. “Okay,” he echoes, into Greg’s shirt. “…Okay.”

Greg offers another squeeze and a silly sort of rock sideways on his toes, forcing them both one way and the other, then pulls away. It’s seems like he might give Tom a break, until he proceeds to grab, somewhat awfully, at Tom’s hand to tug him back out to the room.

Tom finds himself fully clothed on the other side of the bed, as close to the edge as he can get, and stiffly listening to Greg breathe into the dark a couple feet away while his tacky lashes dry. He thinks he’ll be able to slip out, once Greg is really asleep, and start stage one of his rough plan to gaslight Greg, and himself, into forgetting every major beat of the last half hour or so ever happened.

“Tom,” Greg says, his hand suddenly across the bed and swiping down Tom’s arm in a wide, blind stroke. “I – I… I’m really sorry. I, like – I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Tom says, barely above a mutter, staring up at the faint stream of light through the blackout curtain, where it weakly stretches across the textured ceiling. “I know you didn’t mean it, bud. E makes about anyone look like a ten.”

“I-I didn’t… Wh-what?” Greg sputters, hand sliding up around Tom’s forearm, as he noticeably turns on the mattress, and tightens his grip to painful squeeze. “Anyone?”

It takes everything in Tom not to turn on his side away.

“I like knew you were you, Tom,” Greg says, voice pitching theatrically incredulous, sounding a bit unwelcomingly like he once had in that supposed panic room, but hopefully that means the high is fading, too. “Did you – do you really think I didn’t?”

“Greg –” Tom swallows hard, closing his eyes, as Greg’s other hand abruptly sweeps up clumsily and boldly against his face. He should shove him away, but he… just doesn’t want to, not again.

“That is not true at… at all – that’s awful,” Greg says, as he trespasses entirely across the polite barrier splitting the mattress and bodily curls around Tom, pressing his nose into the hollow of his cheek and mouth turning in close to his ear. “I wasn’t like, uh – like just trying to ki-kiss anyone. Else, I mean. Just you, Tom.”

Tom keeps his eyes closed; for all the room is already dark, he doesn’t want to risk a glimpse.

“So you’re not – um, not a ten, maybe, but you’re like an eight?” Greg says, fingers still rubbing up and down Tom’s arm, trapped now between them, tracing markedly against his wrist bone and then halfway up the center of his forearm along the tendons. “I really like you, but it-it’s hard to sometimes, too, so… that’s a couple off?”

Tom offers a half-hearted attempt at a scoff.

“I swear, it’s not… It wasn’t only the high? I really just think a-a lot about that first night we went out, I guess,” Greg whispers, breath warm and palpable, then he moves his head, so his lips ghost pressure with every spoken word, “And, um, you know, how I went home with you after and you helped me to bed then, too, but… I just – I-I didn’t want the same nothing to happen. Tonight. You know? I am sorry.”

Tom actually doesn’t know, no, because he’s damned sure Greg cannot be fucking serious about wanting anything more intimate than a clap on the shoulder that particular night; he had also, literally that very same day, told Tom he was incredibly mean. He doesn’t think Greg is so fucked in the head. …Probably.

“Tom?”

“Just…” Tom breathes a thin sigh. “Finding you difficult to take seriously, as usual.”

“That’s because you’re sad,” Greg says, sighing into Tom’s cheek, as he cradles the opposite in his palm, thumb sweeping the sensitive skin beneath an eye. “You were crying, because of that… of me.”

Tom thinks he might come close to cracking a tooth, he clenches his jaw so hard.

Greg keeps fondling Tom’s face, up and down, then back again, and his distraction becomes evident in a sudden, winding hum. “Your skin feels nicer than the sheets.”

Tom raises his brows as a laugh breaks weakly from his throat, peeking over in the dark to Greg’s face, visible only by being not even an inch away. He’s staring back, near unblinking, and perhaps has been that way since he reached across the bed. “That is… pretty creepy, bud.”

“True, though,” Greg murmurs, pressing closer with a curve of his fingers down Tom’s jaw to his neck. “Yeah, yeah. Soft.”

Tom takes a careful breath while watching Greg watch him, as fingertips trace down along his neck and throat.

“I think I, uh – I could find you in the dark,” Greg says, humming with a marked self-satisfaction, continuing his maddening human topography mapping with little touches down Tom’s shirt collar and along his collarbone. “I sort of did, I-I guess, but like… real dark. Anywhere. I could just touch you, and – ”

Tom clears his throat, then awkwardly elbows and squirms, rearranging the giant octopus trying to asphyxiate him with feelings, so he can be slightly less lifeless participant. “Fucks’ sake, Greg,” he says, digging his fingers into Greg’s soft, slightly mousse-tacky hair with a scratch. It confirms a months ago, absent admittance from Greg, as he immediately murmurs soft and goes limp on Tom’s shoulder. “Just go the fuck to sleep, you hopped up, second-rate cuddle monster. I’m about to file a complaint somewhere.”

Greg offers a breathy huff, tucking himself even closer, and perhaps cheerfully spiteful, with a knobby knee hooking boldly along Tom’s thigh. It��s not a well-ventilated hotel room, it feels like, all but an outright scam at the price, so it’s going to be a very warm night, but maybe not a bad one.

He moves again, some many minutes later, arm stretching across Tom’s chest while he breathes a heavy, loud sigh straight into his ear. “Will you take it seriously, maybe, if I do it again in the morning?”

“I don’t know,” Tom admits, as heat prickles across his cheeks, yet also suffering a tired flicker of annoyance; he’s warm, and was near sleep, and forgot E is a fucking upper. He wonders, for a ludicrous beat, if he should’ve taken Greg out for walkies.

“What about…?” Greg exhales an uneven, murmuring hum, plainly jumping between thoughts. “You know, near lunch, then. And dinner. As in, a sort of, as well as?”

Tom mumbles through a smack of his lips. “…Maybe.”

[battinscn]

LUNAR NEW YEAR — theodore nott x f! reader

CONTENT WARNING: none

SUMMARY: it’s the first day of lunar new year and you were going home to celebrate with your family. theodore asks if he can come along and you are more than willing to let him. you are ethereally grateful for his deep interest to know more about you and your culture.

WC/ AVG. READING TIME: 1134 words/ 6 minutes

return to the theodore masterlist here

"HAPPY NEW YEAR y/n!" cho greeted when you walked past her while on your way to the great hall.

"thank you cho, 新年快乐! (happy new year)" you returned the greeting.

"why'd chang wish you happy new year?" theodore asked curiously.

“it’s the new year according to the lunar calendar,” you explained.

“does that have to do with why some students get excused to return home tonight?”

"yeap, i have to go visit my popo’s and have reunion dinner with my family tonight. dumbledore allows students who celebrate different festivities that aren't bank holidays to return home for a bit. like during diwali, the patil sisters get to visit their families as well." you explained.

"can i celebrate lunar new year as well?" your boyfriend asked.

"of course you can. if i'm being honest, my popo had written to me this morning asking if you'd like to have dinner with us tonight but i didn't think you'd bother so i didn't bring it up." you admitted.

"didn't bother? i'd love to celebrate with you and your family."

"really?"

theodore noticed the glint and hope in your eyes.

"yes my love, really."

you got dressed in your qipao while theodore was in a dark crimson dress shirt and black trousers.

you and cho chatted as the three of you walked to hogsmeade. you and her talked about how excited you were for the delicious scran that'd you have tonight.

theodore followed behind the two of you, listening to your conversation.

"hi mum, hi dad!" you gave your parents a hug when you saw them standing next to the changs by the entrance of hogsmeade.

"hello mr and mrs y/l/n, happy new year," theodore hugged your parents as well.

"it's lovely you're celebrating with us this year. y/n's popo's been wanting to meet the boy who's got her little granddaughter all smitten." your mother smiled at your boyfriend.

"okay, that's enough of embarrassing me. let's go now." you whined and your father disapparated all four of you away.

you landed by a small cottage somewhere in surrey.

"here, take these," you passed theodore two mandarin oranges.

"when you visit people's houses during the next 15 days, you greet them and hand the oranges to them as a form of good luck." you informed theodore.

the front door opened, revealing your frail nan dressed in a floral shirt and trousers.

you walked in after your parents.

"婆婆，新年快乐！祝你生体健康! (happy new year grandma! wishing you good health for the new year!)" you placed the oranges in your nan's hands.

"唉，我的宝贝孙子。新年快乐! (my darling granddaughter, happy new year)" your nan kissed your cheek and hugged you tightly.

"婆婆，这是我的男朋友, 西奥多. (this is my boyfriend, theodore)" you gestured to theodore.

"hello popo, xin nian kuai le," theodore tried his best to recite the mandarin greeting.

"hello! hello! 哇宝贝，你的男朋友好帅哦! (your boyfriend is so handsome!)" your nan greeted in her cantonese-chinese accent. she knew basic english phrases, but other than that she spoke mainly cantonese and mandarin.

you giggled at your nan's words, "she called you handsome theo baby."

"oh." theodore blushed pink, "xiexie." (thank you)

ever since you and him started dating a few months ago, you had taught theodore a few conversational phrases.

your grandmother invited all of you to sit by the round dinner table.

there was dishes like pen cai, a cantonese dish, as well as other foods like steamed fish and pork ribs, all cooked by your dear nan.

"吃多一点啊宝贝，你又瘦了. 叫你的男朋友吃多一点， 他也那么瘦。怎么可以保护你? (eat more y/n, you've gotten skinnier since the last time i saw you. have theodore eat more too, how's he supposed to protect you if he doesn't eat?)" your nan piled more food onto your already full bowl of rice because all asian grandmothers were like that.

you took on the role as the translator for the night as your nan wanted to know more about theodore.

after dinner, you sat in the living room having tong sui, a sweet soup, and nian gao, a sticky tapioca pudding that was dipped in an egg batter and fried.

theodore felt like the button to his trousers were about to explode from all the food he had scranned that evening.

the five of you then made your way to the back gardens and watched as your father lit the firecrackers with his wand.

"this is brilliant!" theodore exclaimed as the firecrackers exploded in the air with a loud bang.

you wrapped your arm around theodore's waist while his was looped around your shoulder.

you admired your adorable boyfriend as his eyes lit up from the fireworks, his smile wide, dimples on show.

you then looked around and saw your parents and grandparents, huddled together watching the fireworks as well.

your heart felt warm as you enjoyed the moment of getting to spend chinese new year with the people you loved.

you tiptoed and placed a kiss on theodore's jaw, "i love you," you whispered.

theodore looked down at you, surprised by your sudden affection.

"i love you more," he whispered and kissed your forehead lovingly.

"婆婆给你这封红包，祝你学业进步，青春美丽! (stay beautiful and continue studying hard)" your nan gave you a red packet and two oranges.

you thanked her and moved aside so she could get to theodore.

"she says she loved meeting you she hopes to see you again," you translated to theodore.

"tell her i said thank you for the red packet and for welcoming me to her home."

you bid goodbye to your nan and your parents apparated you and theodore back to hogsmeade. they too gave you and theodore a red packet each.

there, you saw cho and a few other students who had gone home for the evening standing and waiting with filch.

"why do you give red packets during chinese new year?" theodore asked as you walked hand in hand, trailing after filch's lead.

"the norm is that married couples or those who are married give them to singles i guess, as a form of good luck. but my nan gives them to my parents as well so it doesn't really matter." you explained.

when you finally returned to the dungeons, it was close to midnight.

"can we go to your nan’s for dinner everyday? i’d much rather have her cooking than what they serve in the great hall.” theodore joked as he collapsed onto bed.

you dried your hair with your wand and slipped under the duvet with him.

“hey theo baby?” you tapped his shoulder just before his eyes were about to close.

“thank you for wanting to know more about my culture, it means a lot to me.”

“thank you for sharing it with me, i love you so much, and getting the to chance know more about you is something i could never pass up.”

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tags: @lilytoyourjames @pattnscn @haroldpotterson @one-direction-harry-potter1 @harryjamespotterswife @fairydxll @xangel76 @daddysfucktoyslut @grandnerdsheep-blog @eleventhboi

[papergirllife]

First Love

Lucas Wong / Yukhei

"They say first love is a special experience that one would always hold a special place in your heart. Wong Yukhei was your first love in high school, but along the way, you had to say goodbye to him in order for him to achieve his dream of becoming a star in Korea. Yet fate and destiny plays its role in paving the two of you an intersection once more, will the two of you and up together at the very end?"

Warnings : smut, unprotected sex, mild angst, a child (pregnancy not described), tooth rotting fluff (all in that order, kinda)

A/N : this is one of my most heavily devoted works I've ever written, so please, of you're comfortable, drop a feedback to tell me if you guys like this writing style, thank you!

Lucas Wong of NCT and most importantly his own fixed unit, Wayv, the man who garners attention and love wherever he goes, that dazzling smile is sure to be captured by numerous cameras of awaiting fans.

But to you, Lucas was never Lucas, to you he was Yukhei, and more significantly, your ex from high school. Yukhei was your first love, you remember when the two of you had first met in Year 9, Yukhei was known for being a class clown and more of a klutz, girls would always have a soft spot for him even if they didn't like him in that way.

Yukhei was your desk mate for Year 10, the thing got you on your nerves about him was that he never took group assignments seriously, and was never at school on time, his uniform was wrinkly from rushing out of his house to catch the bus and always had a stationary missing, which means he had to borrow yours.

You never hated him, hate is a strong word, things were very neutral with him, most times, he unintentionally annoys you, but he'd always make up to you by bringing you a small bottle of apple juice the next day. The only time the two of you really fought was when he had not spoken up when his friends snatched your book away from yours to copy you off, brushing it off as a small matter.

You were quite an immature person back then, and no one can blame you, you were just a teenager, and being said that, you had refused to lend Yukhei a ruler when the math teacher did a pop quiz, so he had to use the dust pan as no one, other than you that is, brings an extra ruler.

It's not your fault, you thought back then, he shouldn't have depended on you to bring his share of stationaries. The next day, you walked into class to see his group of friends waiting at your desk to apologize to you, and as for Yukhei, he had yet again brought you a bottle of apple juice, with the addition of your favourite bar of Cadbury.

It was only in Year 11 when Yukhei had confessed to you, saying that all those annoying things he did to you were just to catch your attention, of all the girls he could've liked, he chose the one who was the most unattainable, go figure.

The next year, when the two of you were looking to apply to the same college, Yukhei broke the news to you that he'd be packing his bags for Korea, that the audition he had joined just for fun accepted him as a trainee in a large entertainment company in Korea that everyone in Hong Kong knows, SM.

At first you didn't approve of his decision, that his education was important as well, that he had a life here, with you. But Yukhei had given very valid reasons to you, that he wouldn't have passed the college entrance exams if it weren't for your tuitions until late at night in the public library, that he didn't really have an interest in studying. His most valid reason was that he didn't want to take a toll on you when you’re in college, he can't have you sacrifice your sleep and attention for him just to have him attain passing grades.

So you let him go, saying your last farewell to him at the airport as his girlfriend and ex girlfriend.

That was the last time you saw him, choosing to not stay in contact with him as you poured your soul into university life, studying like your life depends on it, you had a few boyfriends here and there, nothing serious, nothing that made you felt like your first love. Maybe you had trouble moving on, or maybe it was just stress, you thought back then, shrugging the thought off casually before diverting your attention else where, this cycle carried on until you came out to work.

Fast forwarding to March of 2019, you had unintentionally came across of a news online that Yukhei had finally been placed in his own fixed unit that would be promoting and performing in Chinese, which isn’t surprising, even the Thai member, Ten, was of Chinese heritage. What made your eyes widen was the fact that they were coming to Hong Kong.

At the day of the fan meet, you had took the day off from your boring low paying job at the law firm, so much for studying your ass off for bar exams, you’re just filing on a daily basis.

Before the day of the fan meet, you had lived off of instant cup noodles for a few weeks just to buy the album and their light stick. When you first listened to the album, you were proud of Yukhei’s rapping skills, you still recall the days when he’d struggle with his mandarin oral tests, the teachers there must be much better than you for him to improve so much, smiling fondly at the old memories.

You waved the light stick and sang along just like the other fans beside you, mesmerised by the performance that the boys are putting up, but your eyes were mostly on Yukhei, you would’ve never thought the once clumsy giant like him would dance as fluidly, executing the moves just as well as the other smaller sized members.

You watch as Yukhei introduces himself and his non Cantonese members in his mother tongue, a feeling of familiarity settling into your mind.

You are quite a confident person, but queuing up to the long table where Yukhei sat at the corner was nerve wrecking to you, what would he say to you? Would he recognise you? It hasn't been that long, but the two of you had done some changes to your looks.

The other members had greeted you with a friendly smile and a few casual questions like have you eaten, but they seem a bit taken aback by the lack of fan girl attitude that most of the fans in front of you had.

When you had got to Yukhei, he had dropped his marker on the floor, his head ducked out of sight to retrieve it, but when he came up to apologise, the words were stuck in his throat, as his eyes opened as wide as saucers. He coughed to mask the surprise on his face.

“Hi, how are you?” He asked as he took your album into his hands, scribbling something down.

“Good, how have you been?” although his hair is coloured, his eyes had contacts, and he wasn't in his messy uniform, the smile on his face never changed.

“Great, it's nice to see you,” to other fans and the staff beside him, they might think it's just one of the standard answers, but you knew Yukhei like the back of your hand, registering the twinkle in his eyes.

Soon, he had placed the album back into your hands, your fingers grazing gently as tiny sparks flew up your tips, eyes never breaking contact until the staff tells you to leave.

When you had sat down at a nearby cafe to get a cup of coffee, you took out your album and flipped to the page where Lucas had written something.

‘Hilton hotel, 9pm,' and his number under it.

At nine sharp, you waited by the hotel’s sitting area, not many people at that time as usually stores in Hong Kong open rather late, patiently you waited for Yukhei. Just as you were scrolling through posts on Instagram, a tall figure approached you.

A call of your name rolled off his tongue naturally, a wave of nostalgia hitting the both of you.

“I bought you a little something before I got here,” you said as you stood up, letting him guide you to the elevators.

“What is it?” Yukhei lets out a flustered laugh, scratching the back of his nape when he realised he didn't get you anything in return.

“Roast goose and Cha Siew, are they still your favourite?” you asked, hoping his taste hasn’t changed over the years.

“Yeah, man, I remember how we'd always get quarter of both after school at Uncle Chan’s,” Yukhei said, remembering how the boss of the restaurant had hung a photo of two of you on the wall, deeming the two of you his most loyal lovebirds.

“This is from Uncle Chan’s,” you told him as you followed him into his room, looking around, expecting him to be rooming with someone.

“Don't worry, I told Yang Yang to sleep with Ten for the night,” Yukhei said when he saw you looking for someone.

“Oh, that's really nice of him,” you said as you set out the food, the smell of Hong Kong's famous delicacies wafting in the air.

“Man, I really missed this,” Yukhei said as he pulls the arm chair that was a few feet away close to the desk, directing you into it and situating himself in the not so comfortable wooden chair.

“I missed this too,” you said mindlessly, eyes avoiding his before you ate a piece of meat.

“I missed you too,” Lucas confessed, yes there are many pretty girls in his industry, and Korea itself, but no one would be able to replace you, you were his rock all his life, other than his family of course, it's hard to build a connection with someone just as strong when things between the two of you never really ended, in a way.

Leaving on too good terms and without much closure for both of you kept one another thinking of each other. The two of you know, that after tonight, things would go back to normal, Yukhei would be Wayv’s Lucas, and you’d remain as his past, there would never be an outcome from whatever happens tonight.

So when the two of you were recalling memories and troubles the two of you got in school on the oh so comfortable bed, you couldn't help it, hooking a leg over Yukhei’s waist, just like how it started at the night of the graduation party, the night where the two of you lost your virginities to each other.

“I’d be gone tomorrow, we shouldn’t, I shouldn't do this to you,” Yukhei said, a firm believer that it's always the girl that is on the losing side, like he's taking an advantage of you, ever the gentleman.

“I want this for myself, Yukhei, it's not like it's our first time,” you said, trying to convince him.

“I still feel guilty about our first time, I left a few months later after that night, and tomorrow would be the same, I'll be leaving you once more,” Yukhei said as his big hands caressed your cheeks, eyes wide like a puppy, pupils reflecting an image of you, a perfect representation of his universe, you.

“I don't care, I’ve moved on from you as your girlfriend all those years ago, moving on from you after tonight won't be a challenge for me,” you said in a firm tone, one that Yukhei knows all too well, he knows you won't give up when you sound like this.

He could possibly break two hearts if he chooses to act on his impulses, but he missed this, he missed you, and so he threw all caution out of the window when he smashed his lips desperately against yours, chewing on your bottom lip with little force, it was something that would easily get you worked up back then, and to his delight, it still worked, letting him dominate the kiss easily, he let his tongue slid in your mouth, tasting the beer the two of you had just now with a mixture of strawberry lip gloss, you were still using the Nivea one you used all those years ago, this only fuelled his desire for you, his hands leaving your cheeks to locate your waist, pulling you closer to him.

When you were out of air, you broke off the kiss, reaching the hem of your shirt to pull it off, then waiting a few seconds for Yukhei to admire the red lace on your skin before unclasping your bra, letting your blossoms free, all the while as Yukhei looks on, like he was in a trance.

“I missed these,” he commented before taking a mound into his mouth, sucking on your nipple diligently while his other hand comes up to roll it in between the pads of his fingers, the pleasure from the action making you throw your head back, a slip of his name in between your whimpers.

You let Yukhei push you back, letting you fall onto his bed, you felt his hands wander up your skirt, his huge hands around your thighs, squeezing the flesh in his palms, feeling you, but stopped when he reached the hem of your panties, detaching himself from your chest, looking at you for confirmation.

You nodded at him, putting your hand over his to guide him higher, stopping at the curve of your cheek, pushing his hand beneath the clothe, dangerously close to your core, heck he could even feel your arousal already, eyes rolling back at the thought of getting you so worked up.

“Take it off, but you can leave the skirt, for old time’s sake,” you said.

Yukhei looked at you, confused at what you’re trying to say, until he realised you were wearing a pleated checkered skirt, just like the ones you wore back in high school, memories of the two of you sneaking around, having a quickie with your skirt flipped up immediately made blood rush southwards at the thought.

“Fuck, you expected this to happen?” Yukhei asked, shaking his head in disbelief, he was always the troublemaker at school, but oh how the tables have turned now.

“Didn't you?” you asked before getting up to put yourself in a doggy position, shaking your butt, taunting him.

Yukhei chuckled to himself before doing as you say, taking off your panties to reveal your slick covered pussy, dripping wet for him on display.

Yukhei spreads you open by pulling your cheeks apart to lick a stripe up your slit, making you shudder at the warm muscle that was intruding but very much welcomed.

Yukhei allowed himself to fully stuff his face there, inserting his tongue into your core, thrusting the wet muscle at a moderate pace before adding a finger to the mix, then two, stretching you open to let his tongue delve deeper inside, he then adds a third finger, the fullness finally hitting you, soon he did a come hither movement once he had located your sweet spot, his tongue and fingers rubbing against the roof of your walls deliciously, you would’ve lost your balance if it weren't for his hand supporting you by your left hip.

The constant pleasure that Yukhei so willingly inflicted upon you would've soon come to an euphoric end if he hadn’t halted all movement, pulling out his tongue and his fingers, which made you whine his name pathetically, something you wouldn't have done if it weren't for the fact that your mind was reduced to a ball full of cotton.

“Chill, I worked you up so I wouldn't hurt you with my dick,” Yukhei said as he positions himself at your entrance, his hand coming up to your face to tilt your head to his direction, zeroing on your lust filled eyes and the plump of your lips, swollen because of him.

“Are you sure you want this?” Yukhei asks you one last time.

“Yes, please,” you said, pushing yourself back to lightly grind on his length, a little bit of your arousal getting onto his cock, his dick getting so hard it's starting to hurt.

“Ever so eager, aren't you?” Lucas said before biting his lip at the sight.

“Just put it in!” you whined, tired of his teasing.

“Okay, okay,” Yukhei said before bracing himself for your tight walls, he's never nervous when it comes to others, but you? You always held a special place in his heart.

Yukhei spreads your cheeks once more before aligning himself to slip in an inch, eyebrows furrowing at how tight you were, he could tell you were clenching up, just like you did the first time when you were nervous.

So he bends down to your back, placing gentle kisses along your right shoulder blade.

“Don’t tense up, there’s nothing to be nervous about, we did this before remember?” Yukhei said in his most gentle tone ever, you nodded your head at his words, adjusting yourself to let yourself lose in the comfort of his touch, reminding yourself that although it's been a long time since you had someone as big as him, you’ll be fine in his hands.

Once Yukhei felt yourself unclench, he pushes in furthermore, you felt yourself arching your back to allow him to fit himself easier, before he comes to a halt, you felt so full, you haven't felt this way in such a long time, it was somewhat overwhelming, but it's the most complete feeling ever, a feeling you've never felt with any other.

The initial stretch was slightly painful of course, but the pain soon turned into pleasure, and being the gentleman Yukhei is, waited for you despite the huge urge to move, waiting for your green light.

When you told him he could move, he felt like the gates of heaven just opened, pulling out slightly to give you a shallow thrust, just to test the waters.

Even with that experimental thrust, you felt like you had a taste of heaven, eager to drown yourself in this new found pleasure that you were once so familiar with.

Yukhei grasped his large hands onto your hips, setting a moderate pace, still restraining himself from snapping his hips, but from how much slick you were dripping, soon you'd be begging for more.

Once you felt yourself familiarise with his big cock, the pace that Yukhei had set wasn’t enough, you wanted him to let loose, you wanted him to rail you, be damned if you can’t walk tomorrow.

So in the midst of all the pleasure, you let out two desperate words breathlessly, “ruin me”.

Yukhei had to do a double take, pausing his movements entirely just to check if that was his mind messing with him or it was really you, but one look at your desperate face, revealed to him that was in fact your words.

Yukhei allowed the animalistic side of him to take over, holding onto your hips that would sure leave bruises the next day, but you didn’t mind, not when you felt a sudden surge of pleasure coursing through your body. He angled your body higher, arching your back for easier access, thrusting harder and faster.

You could only submit yourself to him as your toes curled and your fingers dig into the linen sheets, you’re sure if his members were next door, they'd be able to hear every single sound you make, the sound of your ass cheeks clapping against Yukhei’s hips and your high pitched moans were flowing freely, but you didn't care, not when this could be the last time you'd ever be with Yukhei.

Soon, you could feel yourself getting closer to the edge, your legs were trying their best not to fail you, and you could tell your arms were getting sore from propping yourself up as the cord in your abdomen threatened to snap, you panted out the word ‘close’, and Yukhei immediately understood, fucking into you at an inhuman pace, you could feel yourself losing your mind as spit drips from your mouth, sanity slowly slipping away from you as you felt your impending orgasm, it started from the tip of your toes, your body convulsing as you screamed his name, succumbing into the pleasure, your core bursting, the strongest orgasm you've ever felt, making your whole body sag in defeat as you let Yukhei help you ride out your orgasm.

Just when you thought it was all over, Yukhei gently flipped you over, and that’s when you realised he hasn’t cum, so you lifted your legs higher to let him enter you once again, he was using you like his personal doll, and you love it a little bit too much to be considered normal, you struggled to keep your eyes open as you fought through the slight pain from the overstimulation, hearing Yukhei’s mumble of appreciation and endearments.

“Can you give me one more, babe? Just one more,” Yukhei said before circling his fingers around your clit, making your eyes snap open when you realise he wants you to cum once more, your hands coming up to push his hand away, but his other hand grasped onto yours.

“Just one more, please,” Yukhei begged with those puppy eyes of his, and how could you say no?

So you stopped struggling, nodding your head at his request before he quickens the pace of his hips and the ministrations on your clit.

Soon, you could feel Yukhei’s cock swelling inside you before he let out a groan of your name, thrusting in one last hard thrust before he painted your walls white, his lips capturing yours to silent you as you came once more, your nails digging into his shoulders, your eyes fluttering shut as you felt Yukhei ride out both your highs.

Once he was done, Yukhei crashed onto the bed beside you, his arms wrapping around yours, kissing your lips to distract you as he pulled out, hopping into the attached bathroom to bring out two towels, taking off your skirt before he gently cleans you up, when he was done he wiped the juices you left on him, your eyes growing big when you knew it was from when you squirted on him.

“Sorry, I didn’t realise I squirted,” you mumbled behind the hands that you had covering your embarrassed face.

Yukhei laughed at the cute sight, throwing the towel aside before climbing into bed again, removing your hands away from your face, kissing you deeply before looking at you in the eye.

“I loved it,” he said before pulling you closer, and almost instantly, you were lulled to sleep by the beating of his heart.

When you woke up, Yukhei was still snoring beside you, sleeping like a baby, you gently removed his hand from your waist, stepping out of the bed before gathering your clothes, putting them on, smoothing out the creases of your skirt.

Walking to the door, you glanced around once more at the sight of him, your heavy heart begging you to stay, to talk, and so you walked over to the night stand, ripping a piece of paper of the note pad and grabbing the pen next to it.

‘Goodbye and thank you for everything.’

You placed the piece of paper beside him on his pillow before kissing his forehead as a parting gift, closing the door as softly as you could when you left.

You knew this was the right thing to do, you made this decision once when he left for Korea the first time, you can't be in his way this time around, not when he's this far into his career, you can’t be selfish, he belongs on this path, he deserves it and you’re not going to take it away from him, you've stood on the side-lines all this time, he shed the limelight on you for one night, and that's all you should have, he's better off without you.

Yukhei felt himself grow cold when he couldn't feel the warmth of your body, jerking up to check if you were in the bathroom, only to find the door wide open, the room empty.

That's when he had spotted the piece of paper with your goodbye message, his heart clenching in pain, crashing onto the bed once more.

He didn't know what to expect, you had sent him off once, and now you left him without saying goodbye. He thought he could at least say goodbye.

Pushing his thoughts away, he gathered his things, packing up to leave for Korea.

His members could tell something was terribly off, they thought he was just in it for a casual hook up, but his expression tells otherwise.

The usual cheerful Yukhei was nowhere to be found, which meant Yang Yang and Hendery had to keep the mood light throughout the journey home, everyone knew to not say anything, only speaking when crucial.

It took Yukhei quite a while for him to get back to his goofy self, but even then, Kun, being the most observant one, saw a tightness in his smile, a faraway look in his eyes, whoever he had seen that night must've meant a lot to him, but he dare not to press, he knows Yukhei would open up when he's ready.

It was a normal Tuesday night when he had received a request to face time from you, without thinking much of it, excited to hear from you, he accepted, your beautiful face coming into view as he got comfortable on his bed.

“Hey, this is unexpected,” Yukhei said, not knowing what else to say.

“Yukhei, there’s something I need to tell you,” you said, eyes avoiding his.

“Yeah, what's up?” he asked, rubbing his nape, a habit he does whenever he's nervous.

“I'm um, I’m pregnant,” you said, choosing to not beat around the bush.

You could see Yukhei's face pale when he processed your words. Is it his? It's definitely his, it's almost a month since the two of you slept together, unless you slept with someone else?

“It's mine?” a dumb question, but he needs to know for sure.

“Yeah,” you said before the two of you come to a piercing silence.

“You could get an abortion, maybe?” Yukhei suggested after contemplating in his head, there’s no way he could be in the child’s life, and that's the best option for your sake, raising a child in Hong Kong is the most expensive thing to do, equivalent to buying a house there.

“I decided to keep it, Yukhei,” you said, glancing up to see the disbelief on his face.

“You can’t, you know I can't be there for you and you’re still so new in your job, you can't risk your life for this!” Yukhei said, not comprehending on why you'd do this to yourself.

“I already decided, Yukhei, and I don't expect you to take responsibility, this is my choice,” you said as tears threatened to flow.

“That isn't fair, it's not fair for the child! A child needs its father! You don't know what you're doing! Being a single mum is next to impossible in Hong Kong! You're putting the child in a horrible situation just for your selfishness!” Yukhei said before pushing his hair back, the feeling of an impending headache forming.

“How dare you say that?! I’ll raise this child perfectly on my own, I was just calling you to inform you of it, but since you don't want anything to do with it or me, I guess this is goodbye and don't call me anymore, I won't change my mind,” you said before your face disappeared from his phone screen.

Yukhei tried calling you immediately after, a day later, several weeks later, but you never picked up. Then he started stressing about his career, what would happen if someone were to find out? But he knows you as a person, and being a tell-tale is not one of your characteristics, yeah, he can just act like nothing happened, like he had never received this call.

He knows he's running away from his problems, but what other choice does he have?

Fast forwarding to July of 2021, Yukhei is home after his filming of the popular Chinese reality show in China, Keep Running, he feels at ease when he sees his family, finally reuniting with them, but only for a short two weeks time, before he has to leave for Korea once more.

It was a Friday night when his friends from home took him out for a drink, he was not so familiar with the clubbing scene in Hong Kong, but with the knowledge he has of this area, he knows many rich and young people often here, just like the girl kissing up his neck now, her soft hands running up the expanse of his thigh, getting dangerously close to where he wants her to be.

Yet Yukhei doesn’t remember her name, was it Candy? Apple? Some sort of name that had to do with food, he just remembered that she told him that she was an up and coming model, or trying to be anyways.

Just as she suggested to go to some hotel, Yukhei suggested for a quickie in the bathroom first, and so here he is now, being pushed to the door of a stall, her hands trying to unbuckle his belt.

Yukhei reached the back of his pocket for his wallet, opening it, looking for the condom he had placed there, but cursed when he realised he must've dropped it when he paid for drinks.

He told her to go back out and wait for him to get some, leaving the club and the musky smoke filled place behind him, the summer breeze blowing his hair all over, he brings the hood of his jacket up as he scans for a nearby convenience store, locating one at the street across.

When he got in, the scent of curry immediately greeted him, it was your favourite food, everyday after school, no doubt you'll drag him into one of these shops, just to share a bowl of curry fish balls, one of the most famous snacks here in Hong Kong.

He pushed the thought away, trudging to the aisle that was on the most right, where the condoms were at, hidden away from children. He took a box and made his way to the counter, opening his wallet to take out a few notes.

The cashier turned her back from stocking the cigarette shelf, scanning the box wordlessly.

“That would be 30,” she said when she looked up, but her hand immediately dropped the box when she saw who it was, and that's when Yukhei truly opened his eyes to see who it was, at first he was just miffed not knowing why the cashier froze, then he sees you, in the worn out 7 Eleven uniform, was you, the last person he’d be expecting.

“Why are you here? What happened to your job at the law firm? Why...” Yukhei didn't know how to ask, he didn't know if he deserved the right to ask, yet there's so many questions he had swarming in his head. Where is his child? Did you abort it in the end? Did you give it up for adoption? Were you fired from your job because of it?

“It's my shift right now, and you seem to be getting lucky tonight,” you said stiffly, holding up the box for him to see, sliding it across the counter

“It's for my friend actually,” Yukhei said, eyes avoiding yours, but immediately looking at you straight in the eyes, remembering how you use to be able to see right through him whenever he didn't do the revision work you've given him.

“Right,” you said, resisting to roll your eyes.

“You haven't answered me, why are you working here instead of the law firm?” Yukhei pressed.

You sigh at his persistence, not knowing what to say to humour him, so you didn't say anything, getting back to rearranging the shelves.

Yukhei bit his lip, not knowing what to say to you, but a million questions in his head, desperate for answers.

“Please leave if you're done with your purchases,” you said, you had a long day, and the thought of entertaining him was not something you want to add on your plate.

Yukhei looked around the store once more, grabbing a bowl of instant noodles from the shelf before making his way once more to the cashier.

“I’d like to have this here,” Yukhei said before pulling out some spare change from just now.

“Yukhei, what are you trying to do?” you asked in an exasperated tone, there's no point making small talk when there's no way the two of you would ever cross in each other’s lives ever again.

“I'm hungry, I want to eat noodles,” which wasn’t really a lie, all the alcohol he drank before gave him an appetite.

You sighed, turning your back to him, soundlessly waited for the water to boil before pouring it into the cup, sealing the top for it to cook. As you worked, Yukhei was having déjà vu, this was an all too familiar sight, nights at the convenience store studying till late at night in groups, you'd always share noodles with him as you taught him some dumb math formula that no one uses in their life after school.

He takes his bowl of noodles, opting to sit at the place closest to the counter, just looking at you, eating as slow as humanly possible.

When it was around three, you received a call.

“Hello?”

“...”

“You think you have a stomach ache? Celine jia is asleep? Okay, mama’s coming home okay?” you said frantically before shutting off the stove of the food at the counter, running to the back for a pack of meds, depositing some money into the register. You looked at Yukhei, frozen at his seat, cursing at yourself for not going into the back room before picking up the call.

“You need to go, I have something to deal with,” you said as you grabbed your bag, turning off all the switches in one go, making the place pitch black other than the lights from the lamp posts outside.

“Is that my child?” Yukhei asked, he can't allow himself to act like it never happened before, he ran away once, it's time to man up and shoulder on his responsibilities.

“No I fucked another guy before you and it's his child,” you deadpanned.

You walked down the street to flag for a taxi that is always parked there to get their club goer customers, Yukhei hot on your heels, you turned back to look at him questioningly.

“This is none of your concern, don’t follow me,” you said in a rather seething tone, you didn't mean to sound like that, but if he's going to be in the way of your child, then he’s not a friend.

“That's my child too, I want to know how they are, I have a right to do so, you studied law, you should know,” Yukhei retorted in the most friendly way possible, he knows he's in the wrong, but he wants to ensure his child’s safety.

“For fuck’s sake,” you cursed aloud before stepping into the taxi, leaving the door open for him.

You told the driver your address, sitting back to think of what's the problem, the kindergarten shouldn't be the culprit, it's a school with a good reputation, which also burns a hole in your wallet, but you don't mind, and it's not like you have much of a choice, education is deadly expensive here.

About 20 minutes later, you've reached home.

“That'll be 150, miss,” the driver said.

“What?!”

“Fares are different after midnight, miss,” the driver reminded you.

Before you could check if you had enough money on you, Yukhei paid for it wordlessly.

You got out of the car, rushing into the building and running up the stairs as quick as you can, unlocking the door, jabbing the keys into the rusty lock.

Taking off your shoes before you made your way to your room, spotting your son crouched in the corner of your bed, hands around his stomach.

“Hey, mama's home, I'll get you a glass of water to take your medicine okay?” you said before hurrying out, Yukhei passing you a glass of water at the kitchen.

“Thanks,” you mumbled before making your way back inside.

You open the package and passed you son a tablet, but looking at the size, you knew he’d panic to swallow something this big, so you broke it in half, telling him to drink a big gulp of water to wash it down and it'll be fine.

All the while, Yukhei was watching with wonder leaning by the door frame, even in the dim lights and the fact that he's still quite young, he could still identify his eyes on his son, the strong genes in his family, his father and brother all had those eyes, this boy is most definitely his.

The boy diligently does as you told him, taking a big gulp of water, so obedient, and from the way the two of you communicate, very mature for his age, nothing like the usual three year old.

When he was done, he noticed Yukhei’s presence, tugging your sleeve to whisper into your ear, eyes trained on him.

“That's a friend of mine, love, be polite, say hi to Yukhei gogo,” you urged.

Yukhei took this as a sign to get closer to his son, squatting down to meet his eye.

“You’re a handsome boy, what's your name? I’m Yukhei and I’m 22 this year, how about you?” Yukhei asked as he reached out his hand for the little boy to shake.

“I’m Wenghei, 3 years old. Why have I never seen you before gogo?” the child asks, looking at him with curious eyes, he's met some of your friends, but he's definitely haven't met him before, most people aren't as tall here, or not in his mother's circle anyways.

“Get some rest, love,” you said, tucking him into bed.

“Okay,” he said, a yawn coming out from his mouth.

You closed the door behind you, directing Yukhei to the small living room area, serving him a glass of water.

You walked to the trash bin, opening the lid to check its contents, a scowl on your face when you saw the root of your son’s stomach ache when you spot the plastic container that contained the two day old pizza from the freezer. Your roommate, Celine, must’ve gave him some as dinner, usually you'd leave some money for Celine to buy him dinner, but she must've been tight on money again, trying to find ways to squeeze in some spare change, you've warned her of her spending habits, always splurging on albums of her favourite stars, which reminds you.

“You have to go, I’m living with a roommate and I'm sure she's going to recognise you,” you said, a hand gesturing at the door.

“Wait, did you find out why he had a stomach ache?” Yukhei asked.

“Yeah, he ate something he shouldn't have for dinner, you have to go, I need some rest for tomorrow,” you said, struggling to keep your eyes open.

“Do you have anything on tomorrow? Can I see you, perhaps?” Yukhei asked, he didn't know what he wanted to talk about, but he just had to see you again.

“I’m tutoring a student at a coffee shop tomorrow, you can come right after,” you said, thinking that he just wants to know more about his son.

“Okay, goodnight then,” Yukhei said awkwardly as he walks towards the door.

“Goodnight,” you said, feeling a weight on your chest, dreading tomorrow’s meeting.

When Yukhei arrived at the café, he could see you sitting at the way back, a teenage girl sitting in front of you, back facing him, he sipped on his latte, observing you silently.

Your hair is much longer than it had been in high school, the bag hung by your chair very much worn out, and your eye bags were heavier than on days where Yukhei would stay up to prepare for promotions.

Soon, the student was packing up, leaving the table, Yukhei took this as a sign to move to your table. You had stood up to greet him, and that's when he saw, you had lost lots of weight, and he's not meaning it in a fitness way, he recognised the jeans you are wearing, you had these even back then, they used to be a perfect fit for you, that's why they were your favourite, but now, you were wearing a belt to hold it together, and still he could see how loose it was.

“Hey, you didn't order anything?” Yukhei asked, noting that the cup of coffee he saw just now belonged to your student.

“I got a coffee in my flask, cheaper that way,” you said as you packed up your stationaries.

“What did you have for breakfast? How about I order you a piece of cake?” Yukhei suggested, looking back to see what they have today.

“It's alright, I'm not hungry, why don't we get straight to the point? What is it you want to ask about Wenghei?” you asked, noting the time on your watch, you have to leave around noon to fetch your son from pre school.

“I, how about you? Why did you leave the firm? And how’s your parents?” Yukhei started off.

“Well, they said I would’ve been an embarrassment to the firm, you know, pregnant and unmarried, so they told me to leave, it's not like filing could be done with a big weight in my stomach, so I did as they said. Now I tutor kids English and work the night shift at the convenience store, and as for my parents, they kicked me out,” you said, laying down the cards, no point avoiding his questions, especially not when you're in a hurry.

Yukhei nodded at your words, registering the fact that he had a fault in ruining your hot shot lawyer dreams and completely destroyed your sensitive relationship with your parents, how is he ever going to forgive himself?

“I’m sorry,” Yukhei said, he didn't know what else to say, how could he make it up to you and your son? Will you let him even if he could?

“Don't be, this is on the both of us, are you going to ask about the share custody stuff? If so, I don't think we should continue this conversation, Wenghei doesn’t know who you are, and maybe that's the best case scenario, what point would be made if he knew you were his father but you're not in our lives? It'll break his heart. You've seen him now, maybe you can reconnect with him when he's older, I think you should just say goodbye before you go, if you want,” you said, saying these harsh words aloud wasn’t easy, you’re not entirely a cold hearted bitch, but it's for the best that your son didn’t know about his father, no one wants to know the fact that their father abandoned them twice, some truths are better to be untold.

“Can I see him one last time, maybe tonight? For dinner? I'm leaving in two days,” Yukhei said in a defeated tone.

“Yeah, sure, I'll take the shift off tonight,” you said, eyes avoiding his, you could just tell he’d have those sad puppy eyes on his face right now, you don't need anymore guilt in your heart.

“Hey man, where were you?” Jackson asked Yukhei, who was waiting for him at the harbour, they were going to Macau for a day trip today, his friend isn't late for the boat, but they did schedule to meet 15 minutes earlier.

“Something came up, and I need to head back around 7, there’s some people I need to see,” Yukhei said as they boarded the boat.

“So that leaves us 5 hours, should be enough,” Jackson said, checking his watch.

“I’m sorry about this, man, it just came up suddenly,” Yukhei said as they took their seats, apologetic because they have been talking about this trip for a long time now.

“It's okay, dude, but what's up? You look really stressed,” Jackson asked, taking in Yukhei's clenched jaw and furrowed brows, a stark contrast from his usually carefree expression.

“It's a long story,” Yukhei said as he mindlessly watches the sea from the little window of his seat.

“Well, if you don't mind, this is a 45 minutes journey, maybe we'll be able to find a solution together, what are friends for am I right?” Jackson offered, he wouldn't press his friend if he didn't want to tell him about it, but the two of them have been close ever since going on knowing brothers, coming from the same home country and everything.

And so Yukhei, for the first time, told his friend his long love story.

“You know, I think I have a solution for you, but let me ask you one thing first, do you still love her?” Jackson asked as he ate his pork chop bun, Macau’s famous local snack.

Yukhei pondered over his friend’s question, yes the two of you agreed to break up, but all the girls he dated after you, all had similar features or personality traits to you, he had dismissed it as just a type, but now that he had seen you again, he realised that the hole in his heart was always emptied for you, you were the missing puzzle piece all along.

“You don't even have to answer me, your face tells all man,” Jackson said, an oily finger wagging at the direction of his face.

“Yeah, I think I do,” Yukhei said with a sigh, “but even if I still love her, that doesn’t mean she loves me back, and what if we do love each other? We're living oceans apart,” Yukhei said in a defeated tone.

“Now here comes my solution, so you said she got fired from her law firm and is now tutoring kids and doing the night shift at 7 E, and got kicked out by her shitty parents, so she really doesn't have anything else here for her other than her son, why don't you suggest get to move with you? To Korea? It'll be way easier for the two of you to raise your son, even if the two of you don't get back together, I mean, at least you'll be able to financially support them, that is what you're willing to do right?” Jackson asked, hoping that his friend would uptake his part of the child support.

“Yeah, of course I want that, I just don't know what she'll say, or if she'd be willing, she doesn't speak the language and it's an entirely different environment,” Yukhei said, thinking back the days where he had a tough time adjusting.

“From what you told me, she sounds like a tough nut, but of course, this is all up to you, but just so you know, I would really like to be his godfather, and as for your doubts of her love towards you, she did name him after you, isn't it the same Hei?” Jackson said with a hearty chuckle, he could just imagine the fun they'll have together, he was always fond of children.

“Yeah, I’ll persuade her on this,” Yukhei said, he could already feel himself getting nervous for tonight’s dinner, it can’t be that much of a coincidence that his son’s last name resembled his right? Or is he and Jackson just being delusional?

“Now that's my buddy, now come on, finish your food so that we’ll make it in time for the next batch of Portuguese egg tarts, I remember they have a fresh batch around 4,” Jackson said, mouth salivating at the thought of more food.

When you arrived at the restaurant, it was fancier than what you had expected, feeling underdressed among the rich elite of Hong Kong in your old dress that you wear for every special occasion.

You asked if there was a reservation under your name, since Yukhei said he had it booked under you, and almost immediately, since not that many people can afford places like these, the waiter led you in.

“Mama, what is this place? We've never ate here before,” your son asked you.

“It's a French cuisine restaurant, we’re meeting gogo here, remember him? Or were you too sick that day?” you said as you placed him on the baby chair you had requested for.

“Yeah, I remember,” your son said as he looks around in awe, registering the pretty chandeliers that look so sparkly.

When the waiter handed you a menu, someone had joined your table, his hoodie pulled up so no one would recognise him, pulling it down when he saw that there wasn't any other customers around.

“Sorry, am I late?” Yukhei asked with a sheepish smile, a hand lifting up to check the time.

“No, we’re just early, say hi to Yukhei gogo, love,” you directed the last part to your son, patting his little hand to get his attention, smiling immediately when he lands on the tall figure.

“Gogo, you're here,” your son said excitedly, making grabby hands at him, letting his father carry him with a large smile on his face.

“Hey, buddy, don't you look excited to see me?” Yukhei said before blowing raspberry at his neck, making the young boy giggle.

What you didn't expect was to see someone coming up behind Yukhei, a little bit shorter and smaller in built, but when he pulled his hoodie down, you instantly recognised who it was.

“Jackson Wang?” you asked, blinking your eyes a few times to see if you were hallucinating.

“Hey, it’s nice to finally meet you, you look lovely tonight, and you must be little Wenghei, aren't you adorable, how about Jackson gogo take you out to buy toys, huh? I saw a big toy store just across the street, but only if your ma says yes of course,” Jackson said, giving you a side eye to Yukhei.

“Yeah, sure,” you said, it's not like the Jackson Wang is going to kidnap your son right?

“Don’t worry, I’ll watch him with my life,” Jackson said as Yukhei passes his son over to him, leaving the restaurant with his hood up once more.

“Is there something you'd like to say?” you asked Yukhei after he had taken the seat across you his hands were shaking slightly as he holds up the menu.

“I... I still love you. And I know I must sound like a jerk to you, hell I’d go back in time just to hit myself for running away, I'm really sorry for that. What I did was inexcusable, my career just stabilised at that time, and I was under immense stress from SM, you have every right to be mad at me, but I want to be apart of your life again, apart of Wenghei’s life as well, if you could let me have this second chance, I'll do anything to make the both of you happy,” Yukhei said in one breath, reciting what he had practised over and over again with Jackson in the car.

“Yukhei, I,” you were lost for words, you thought you were saying goodbye once more, that Yukhei and you would always end up in goodbyes, but now here he is, saying he loves you.

“Yukhei, you can't just say you love me for the sake of our son, and neither would you need to take responsibility for him, I chose to have him, and as for love, we can never be together, you’re an international super star now, and you're living in Korea, I don't think I have the energy to be in a long distance relationship with you, that would take a toll on Wenghei too, how am I going to explain to him that his father is in another country? He’ll always question your love for him and I don't want that,” you said, trying to hold in the tears that had built up in your eyes, your throat closing up, the cold facade you built for yourself crumbling down before his eyes.

“You can move to Korea, both of you, we can be a family,” Yukhei pleaded, his hands reaching forward to hold yours, his eyes searching yours.

“We can’t, what if we break up? What if your so called love for me, is just something you feel as a result of our child? You can't uproot the two of us when there's so many uncertainties, especially our emotions,” you said, you don't want either of you to be stuck in a relationship for the sake of raising a child, no one would be happy in the end.

“Love, you don't understand, I've never had a serious relationship after you, I tried, I really did, but I’d always think of you instead, how badly I wanted you instead of someone who reminds me of you, the thing is, I’ve always loved you, and I think you still love me too, or you wouldn't have named our son after me, am I right?” Yukhei hoped, why else would you come up with that name right?

Damn it, you thought to yourself, he saw right through you, maybe you shouldn't have named your son after him.

You looked at him and looked away, darn those puppy eyes, you’re sure you’re crying now, and Yukhei reaching over to wipe away your tears just confirmed it.

“I love you, it's always been you, only you,” Yukhei confessed.

“I, I love you too, Yukhei, and I was never mad at you for running away from us, I know how tough that industry is, but what if your fans find out about us?” you asked, slightly worried that he might lose it like last time.

“Then so be it, true fans would stay,” he said in an affirmative tone, reassuring you.

“You promise?” you asked, holding out your pinky, it would’ve been a funny sight to see if anyone saw the two of you now, crying and smiling at the same time.

“I promise,” Yukhei said before hooking his own pinky to connect with yours.

“If you leave us, Wong Yukhei, I’ll murder you in your sleep,” you said as threatening as you could sound.

“I plan to see our son grow up, so I'll value my life,” Yukhei said in utmost sincerity before grabbing a napkin to wipe away all your tears, you’re glad that you didn't wear any mascara today.

Just when Yukhei wiped away the tears in his eyes, Jackson was back with your bubbly child, his arm had bags digging into his flesh.

“Oh my god, that's too much, Wenghei why did you get so many, this is Jackson gogo’s hard earned money,” you said, lecturing your son.

“It's okay, he's an angel, this was all on me, and I guess things went well?” Jackson asked, eyes darting to your connected hands.

“Yeah,” you said, the biggest smile you had on your face.

“That's great to hear, I always wanted to be an uncle, now if you’ll excuse me, I don't think I should crash this family reunion any longer,” Jackson said giving his best friend a hug before leaving.

“So... What do you like to eat Wenghei? How about we get crème brulé,” Yukhei asked, pointing at the menu with childlike eyes, reminding you of the days where he’d get ice cream with you, splitting it on half for you to share.

“Sounds delicious.”

You let Yukhei order everything, sharing between the three of you while the three of you talked, Yukhei mostly directed the questions at his child, asking about his interests, his favourites of everything, ranging from colour to ice cream, eager to make up for loss time.

“How about we talk about where you'll be staying?” Yukhei asked after ordering dessert.

“Oh, I don't know what I'll be able to afford, I'll probably get another convenience store job again, so the rent can't be too high,” you said, dreading the thought of needing to learn a new language quickly for a job.

“Hey, you don't need to work anymore, nor pay rent, I already looked it up, there's an empty unit in our condo, the soundproofing might be a bit lacking, but that wouldn't be a problem if you don't sing in the shower like Dejun, we had a few noise complaints because of him,” Yukhei said, laughing at the fond times he had at the dorms.

“Yukhei, I know housing is really expensive there, are you sure you want to do this?” you asked once more, you don't want him to resent the financial burden the two of you would add onto him.

“What did I say to you just now? I said what I meant, I want the two of you to be in my life, forever. And don't worry about money, I saved up plenty and there’s many more jobs coming up for me, and moving out of the dorms would be the next step of adulthood to me, and we’ll get to spend so much more time together, right Wenghei?” Yukhei asked, pinching your son’s chubby cheeks teasingly.

“We’ll be living together, Yukhei gogo?” your son asked, a confused expression on his face, he had his attention trained on some pink fong video, something about dinosaurs.

“Yeah, Wenghei, we’ll be moving out of our little room, are you excited? We're going to a new country. Remember the dramas I watched with you? Korea has that big outdoor theme park you said you always wanted to go, and snow, you'll get to make snowmen during the winter,” you persuaded, hoping he won’t fuss too much about the move.

“Really? There’s snow in Korea?” your son asked, excited about the winter scene he’ll get finally see in real life.

“Yeah, real snow, not the bubbles in Disney land, are you excited?”

“Yeah, is Jackson gogo going to stay with us too?” your son asked, eyes darting to his new goodies before looking at you expectantly.

“Well, Jackson gogo has his own house and we have ours, but we can always visit him,” Yukhei explained.

“Hehe, okay,” your son said before getting distracted by the crème brulé set in front of him, digging in immediately.

“When do you want us to make the move?” you asked, thinking of all the things you have to pack, which isn't a lot, but you might have to courier some of your clothes over first.

“Whenever you want, I'll get our home ready as soon as possible, is there anything you need in the house? Other than the basics of course,” Yukhei asked, uncertain of any needs you have as a woman or maybe for your son.

“Can we have a study room for Wenghei? With a desk and shelves? We love to read, and he'll need a proper desk when he's older,” you asked, hoping it wasn't too much.

“Yeah, sure, I'll be sure to get it done,” Yukhei said, noting it down into his phone.

“But it's no rush on the study room part, he's just three after all, before I go, I have to apply visas for both of us,” you said, dreading the thought of filling up paperwork, you haven't done much of that ever since you left the law firm.

“Call me if you need any help on that, I'm sure my manager knows how to,” Yukhei said.

“You’re going to tell your company about us?” you asked, knowing how strict Korean entertainment companies are.

“They can't let me go just because of having my own family, they didn't let Jongdae, my senior, go, so we’ll be fine, I promise,” Yukhei said, reaching a hand over to hold yours reassuringly, his eyes looking into yours, filled with love and adoration.

“Okay, now how about we walk around the complex until 10? Wenghei doesn't have school tomorrow,” you suggested.

“Yeah, sure, we could even stay out later if you want,” Yukhei said enthusiastically, getting up slightly to call for the bill.

“You have a flight to catch tomorrow,” you reminded him in your motherly voice, which you regretted almost instantly, cursing yourself, reminding yourself to act more like an actual 22 year old, but Yukhei didn't say anything about it, hiding his smile by nodding deeply, almost like a bow.

“Okay, I just wanted to spend more time with the two of you,” Yukhei said, stopping when he saw the waiter coming back with the credit card machine, paying with just a glance at the bill.

The three of you spent your remaining time shopping and at the arcade, playing games with your son, Yukhei had insisted on getting you a new pair of sneakers, but you shot him down when he wanted to buy more stuff, especially toys for Wenghei.

“You can buy him toys when we’re there, it'll cost even more to ship more stuff over, and there's a risk of damaging the toys as well,” you said.

But of course your son threw a fit at the shop, all for some legos.

“Hey, buddy, I'll buy you lots the next time I see you, okay? I'll buy you one that's even bigger than this,” Yukhei said, squatting down next to his son, and even then he wasn't eye level with him, sometimes you forget how tall Yukhei actually is until you see a scene like this, or when you stand really close to him.

When it was 10pm, painful goodbyes were exchanged with a promise of face timing everyday, your son cried, and held onto his father dearly, and you haven't even told him Yukhei was his dad, but their bond is evident.

Yukhei held onto you and your son until his taxi came, and you waved until you couldn't see the taillights.

It's been a month since that fateful reunion, and Yukhei has squeezed in face times, calls, and texts in between schedules, giving you and your son time despite his busy career.

His company wasn’t too happy about it of course, but was somewhat glad that you weren't one to babble your business to gossip outlets.

You're now packing your things, one last time, you've been to the post office multiple times before to courier out your stuff to Korea, and every time a box reached his address, Yukhei would take a photo of it, telling you the stuff arrived safely.

Progress on your new home was quick, since it was already a fully furnished unit, Yukhei only needed to buy some furniture and things that cater to your son’s needs, he even picked out a pre school that teaches mandarin, perfect for your son’s adjustment in such a foreign country.

Tomorrow you'd be flying to Korea, a new country, a new start, but there was something clouding your mind, something you've been dreading, but today is the day you’ll tell him.

“Wenghei, can you come to mama for a second?” you asked, soon hearing your son’s tiny footsteps nearing you.

“Yes, mama?” your son asked, a hand around his precious teddy.

“There's something I need to tell you,” you said holding him close to you, letting him sit onto your lap.

“Remember how you asked me why you didn't have a baba while all your other classmates did?” you asked, trying to word it as nicely as possible.

“You said my baba had a really big responsibility, that he couldn't see us because of it, that he'll come back when he's free,” your son answered you, struggling to remember more details.

“Yes, good job, Wenghei, your memorising skills are getting better. Well, your baba is actually Yukhei gogo, he’s back now, and we can finally be a family again,” you said before holding in a breath, not knowing how he’ll react.

“Baba is Yukhei gogo? That's why we’re going to Korea?” your son asked, confusion written on his face.

“Yeah, do you like that he's your baba?” you asked, this could be the most important question ever.

“Yeah, mama, do you love baba? Does baba love you as much as I do?” your son asked, which very much surprised you, but expecting this sort of maturity from him.

“Yes, we love each other, and both of us love you as much too,” you said with a pinch of his chubby cheeks.

“Do we ever have to be separated from baba again?” your son asked, scared of losing his newfound father.

“No, never again, and can you do me one favour, Wenghei? I think the next time when you see your baba, you should run up to him and say hi baba, he’ll be very happy to hear you call him that,” you suggested, imagining the look on Yukhei’s face.

Your son giggled at the thought of making his father happy, agreeing immediately.

“Okay, now go to sleep, it's going to be your first time flying tomorrow,” you said, ushering him onto the bed.

“Okay, goodnight, mama,” your son said to you, just like he did every other night, he seemed to have accepted it very easily, maybe it was due to his age, but some day he might ask his father about his departure personally when he understands more, but that’s a hardship that’s reserved for another day.

The flight was relatively short, though it was rather hard for Wenghei at the start because of the pressure he had experienced in his ears, the crying and whining got you plenty of dirty looks from passengers around you, but you paid no mind to it, you’ve been through worst so this is nothing that can faze you.

When you got there, you saw a lady holding up a plaque with your name on it, her phone in her hand, checking all the moms who came out of the same lane as you.

She had a friendly smile on her face when she saw you, introducing herself in mandarin, being one of Wayv’s staff, a trusted one, according to Yukhei.

She talked to you about Yukhei in general, even giving your son a bar of mini KitKat, praising him for being brave on the flight after she had asked you how was your flight.

Around half an hour later, you've reached your new home, a nice looking condominium that looked about a few years old.

Unloading took quite some time, even with the help of the staff, but what surprised you was the person who was waiting for you inside the lobby.

“You're here!” you said surprised at the sight of the giant.

“Yeah, I am, wanted to give you a surprise, sorry I couldn't be outside, some crazy fans camp outside, can’t let them bring you and Wenghei any harm,” Yukhei said as he carried Wenghei, spinning in a small circle, looking at him with full of love.

“I understand, don't worry, I'm not a teenager girl anymore,” you said as you checked out the place, the sitting area had a couch set and free WiFi, this is a 180 from the living conditions in Hong Kong.

“Baba, did you miss me?” your son asked when he had stopped giggling from his father’s spins, which instantly ceased to a halt, eyes growing as wide as saucers.

“What did you call me? Say it again,” Yukhei said with the biggest smile on his face, all of his teeth were showing.

“Mama said you were my Baba,” Wenghei said like it was as simple as two plus two.

“Yeah... I am your baba, and you're my son,” Yukhei said before holding his son even closer, you could even see the tears at the corner of his eyes.

“Why don't we go see our new home Wenghei?” you suggested, seeing that some people have came out from the lifts, typical going to work hours.

You walked a feet away from Yukhei, not wanting to draw attention, holding onto the lift for Yukhei to bring all your luggage in.

Once you were at your level, you started loosening up, noticing that no one was around.

“This is my members’ unit,” Yukhei said pointing at a door, “And this is ours,” Yukhei said before opening the door for you, welcoming you into a warmly decorated home, every piece of furniture was placed and chose to accommodate your child, all the corners were covered with this e rubber safety stickers.

He showed you into Wenghei's room where the bed had all his favourite characters in the form of a plushie, his bed was soft when you sat down on it, and the blanket he had picked out was a soft fleece material, perfect for the cold weather.

Your son was going around every corner, awing at everything his father had gotten him, especially the Lego sets that were on his desk.

“Thank you, it's beautiful, his room,” you said when Yukhei wrapped an arm around your waist, bringing you closer to him, god how much you've missed his warmth.

“Go take a look at your room,” Yukhei said before pulling your hand into the direction of the master bedroom, welcoming you into a room with a king size bed and silk linen sheets, an aesthetic looking vanity that you've always wanted as a teenager, now as well of course, and a little reading corner just for you by the window.

“It's all I've ever wanted,” you said in disbelief, not knowing how could Yukhei pull this off in such a short time.

“You like it? I got some help from my members, especially Kun for the kitchen, you should check it out afterwards, you always wanted a big kitchen area,” Yukhei said as you laid on the bed, giving your stiff body a rest from the journey.

“Lay down with me for a while, I’m a bit tired from the flight,” you said, making grabby hands at him.

“Nah, I shouldn’t, this is your bed,” Yukhei said, looking flustered.

“Wong Yukhei, I’ve had your child and now you're acting all innocent?” you asked in an accusing tone, playing with him, which made him lay down next to you immediately, he didn't like getting you angry, thinking back all those days when you had lectured him just like that when he forgot to do his homework.

“You want me to sleep here?” Yukhei asked carefully, observing your expressions.

“This is our bedroom, where else do you want to sleep?” you asked, but was promptly cut off by Yukhei's lips on yours, smiling as he kissed you, gentle but expressing all his love for you, a hand lingering on your back, guiding you closer than him.

Many mistakes that had to be made had guided you here, but you've never regretted, for if it wasn't for the hardships and the crossroads, you wouldn't have found a home with the man you'll cross oceans for.

The end.

[english8muffin]

Cozy winter

Summary: going to the market, being cheeky in the parking lot and a warm cuddly morning sprinkled with some funny-business

Warning: Cute banter, smut (NSFW), fluff

Word count: Around 5300 words!

I want to open this with one of my favorite quotes ever, so if you allow me ;)

“Go into the arts. I’m not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven’s sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possibly can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.”  -Kurt Vonnegut 

“We need muffins.”

“We don’t NEED muffins, what we need are some fresh fruit and vegetables, ” Henry butts in. You frown and look up at him, “Oh whatever, Hen. You eat your greens, beans, potatoes and tomatoes, while I get fat by munching on some sweet, sweet, delicious chocolate muffins.”

 He sends you a smirk from across the aisle. It was always fun to do mundane things, like going to get coffee together or grocery shopping, when he was home from filming. The last year you went to university it was very hard to be away from him for such a long time, especially when you still lived in Europe. You would fly over to England once in a blue moon, when Henry was in London and your schedule would allow it. Other times your relationship existed out of phone and video calls. It was a rough period, if you have to be honest. But It made the two of you closer and your bond stronger. It’s true what they say, absence does make the heart grow fonder. 

You let Henry know you were going to get the ingredients for the muffins and start pushing the shopping cart in the direction of the baking supplies. As you walk back to the fresh produce section, you get distracted. So many colorful packaging was just screaming your name…

“What the- lovey! I thought you were going to get your muffin ingredients,” Henry cackles and almost doubles over seeing the now full shopping cart.

It took you a second to answer, a bit too focused on his beautiful face and the smile lines that appeared when he laughed. You quickly try to defend yourself, so he doesn’t think you have no self-control, even though, you know your eyes were bigger than your stomach.

“No! I did get them, they’re just underneath the other bags,” you trail off, eyes drifting to the floor. You sigh, “I just saw this aisle with all the snacks. These magnificent snacks. And, Hen, I’ve never wanted anything more in my whole life! And, Hen-Henry! Henry, listen! Stop laughing at me! It was a moment of weakness! You can’t judge me! You don’t even know how they taste, I promise you, you will understand once you take a bite of everything!”

Henry wipes away a small tear at the corner of his eye and kisses the top of your head. You stroll around the aisles, trying to work through the rest of your grocery list, but suddenly you stop dead in your tracks.

“Hen,” you say, trying to get his attention. He gives you a hum in return, letting you know he heard you, “why on god’s green earth does my grocery list say ‘sex’?” You tilt your head up to his face, seeing a bashful grin. 

You shake your head, clicking your tongue disapprovingly, “it isn’t even on top of the list! You put your oatmeal protein shake before sex, fuck, you even put curry before sex, you really need to get your priorities straight!”

After getting some more stuff, like pak choi, steak, tofu and the ingredients for Henry’s beloved curry you always make him, you walk to the register. 

The petite Asian lady gives you a smile and takes a little peak at Henry, who was too busy looking at the various Chinese cough drops that are displayed in front of the counter. Her brows rise behind her thick glasses, “哇，大帅哥。你很幸运啊。” (Wow, big handsome man. You are very lucky, ah.) She says, turning back to you and winking. You can’t help but chuckle. Grinning you send her an ‘I know’-look.

Hearing your laugh, Henry looks over his shoulder with a questioning look. But you just smile and shake your head.

You two quickly get everything in the reusable shopping bags you brought with you. It was getting late and more people were getting off of work and wanted to do some last-minute grocery shopping. Henry takes both of the flower printed bags and the two of you walk to the car. It was getting colder, your breath turning into puffs of smoke. You look up at the sky glooming over you. They promised snow tonight. 

Seeing Henry load the bags in the trunk, his ass proudly sticking out in the air, you give it a pinch. You just couldn’t resist. It was just there, so you better make use of the situation. 

Feeling your hand touch his behind, Henry turns around, an unamused look on his face.

“Excuse me, miss. But that is mine,” he says, really playing up his posh accent.  “I sure hope you disinfected those filthy little paws of yours.” He cutely scrunches his nose, doing a once over and trying so hard to keep himself from smiling, but failing miserably. He turns back around and arranges the bags in the booth so they won’t tip over.

There is a moment of silence, just the noise from cars driving up and off the parking. From the corner his eye Henry sees the stare you give him but ignores it with a small smirk.

“You know,” you begin with a cheeky undertone, making him curious, “I bet I could kick your ass,” you grin, looking at him and trying to gauge his reaction. 

“What was that, doll?”

“You heard me, big lad!”

“Oh really?” He asks and looks at you, towering over you like a brick wall. His eyes glimmering with mischief. Yeah, no, this was NOT a good idea. 

You squirm a little and a small nervous giggle leaves your lips.

“Yes, I can. Watch m-AHHHH! HENRY!” You squeal as he lifts you and throws you over his shoulder, fully forgetting you are in public. “Let me down, you caveman!” You laugh, slapping his left ass cheek. But he ignores your plea and just slaps your ass in return. 

Wiggling a little, you challenge him, “Beat me up! Come on, do it!” 

He turns his head and playfully bites the exposed skin by your hip, making you shriek like a little kid. 

Henry lets out a loud belly laugh and puts you back on your feet. As soon as the tips of your Dr. Martens touch the pavement, you get pushed against the car. Trapping you between the icy cold black metal and his warm body. His arm goes around your waist and pulls you closer to his front.

“I love you.” The words are hushed but you hear them loud and clear, making a shiver go down your spine. The both of you look at each other, completely enamored and grinning like idiots. Noses and the apples of your cheeks rosy, bitten from the cold.

“I love you too,” you whisper back. His hand glides inside your coat and underneath the thick knitted jumper you finished to other day. He just needed to feel you. You lean up a little and gently push your lips to his, adoring the familiar warmth that fell over you whenever you’d kiss. Before you can come in for a second smooch, he frowns at you. 

“Thought you were going to beat my ass?” He mocks, trying to imitate your accent. 

Lightly tapping your finger against your chin, you pretend to be in thought. 

“Well, this is much more fun.”

“Hmm, agreed,” he grins, already eyeing your red swollen lips and tilting his head towards yours. 

You hear heavy footsteps coming closer, the wooden floorboards slightly creaking under the weight. It was getting dark outside, the overhead lights in the kitchen casting a homey hue down on the oak countertops. Your ‘cooking playlist’ was filling the room with some gentle tunes. You also had a ‘dancing in the kitchen playlist’ but that one was mostly used in the mornings. You hum along to the melody when stirring in the stew you were preparing for the evening, rocking your hips side to side. The stew was softly bubbling away, spreading an amazing aroma around the house. 

The footsteps stop behind you. A moment later two big, sweater wrapped arms envelop around you, delicately caressing you. Henry lovingly pulls your loose braid to the side and places his head onto your shoulder, trying to get a peak at what was in front of you on the stove. 

“What smells so good in here?” Just then Henry’s stomach makes a loud grumbling noise from the mouthwatering smell going on in the kitchen, you chuckle. 

He had been gaming before this, you could hear the tiredness in his voice, it was a bit lower and more hoarse than normal. Whenever he was tired like this, he’d just turn into your big cuddly bear, you loved it. 

Dinner was almost done. You made one of the dishes your grandma used to make for you when you were younger. You won’t lie, it was pretty difficult at first to decipher the little recipe she send you in the post, but now you knew it by heart. 

“Cantonese style braised beef stew with white radish, bean curd sheets and a side of rice,” you inform him and brush your hand over his, that was placed on your stomach. Hearing that, he has to make sure he’s not drooling.

“And for dessert…” You nod your head toward the piping hot apple crumble pie currently cooling on the kitchen island. “We still have some vanilla ice cream if you want to have that with your pie. I know you want to be healthy, but I just really wanted to make a pie and this one does have filling,” you ramble, joking on the last part about the filling. He probably thought you were pestering him with his diet that most likely didn’t allow him to eat it. 

You wince a bit, feeling him tense against you. “You don’t have to eat it, my love, promise!”

“No petal, you’re just… you’re just so perfect,” Henry admits, pressing a kiss just below the strap of the pistachio green apron you were wearing, nuzzling his nose in your tousled hair.

It was a gloomy Saturday morning in London. If your alarm hadn’t gone off, you wouldn’t have known it was morning already.

Yesterday after dinner, the two of you cuddled up on the sofa, under a warm blanket with Kal snuggled up on your lap. His head resting in your lap, while his tail occasionally slapped Henry in the face, making you burst out laughing and Henry almost choke on the fur. The akita would fondly press his snout deeper against you, really loving the head scratches he was receiving. Both you and Henry were fully satisfied with the tasty dinner you had paired with a glass of wine and were now cheekily flirting with each other while watching a detective movie, of which you missed the plot because you were, well, differently occupied…

Now the bedroom held a calm, soft aura, a dim light streaming in through the linen curtains. You let out a little whimper, not wanting to leave the bubble you are in and stretch out your limbs. A bit sore from sleeping in a weird angle, amongst other things. Behind you, you hear a small sound of protest and before you know it, you are engulfed by a strong arm. Henry hides his face in the side of your neck, keeping his eyes closed, groaning, clearly displeased with the fact it was morning already. 

You smile, this was your favorite kind of morning. Warm and cozy in bed, cuddling with your boyfriend. You turn around, careful to not let any cold air under the duvet, your arm going around the large form beside you and curling your fingers in the mess of curly hair. Henry moaned, burying his face lower, between your breasts. Now fully content and still a bit dazed by sleep, he lets out the most awful snore. Even though he sounded like a drowning goat when he snored, you couldn’t do anything other than coo and gently scratch your fingers on his scalp, lovingly gazing at the man beside you. 

“Are we going to be lazy couch potatoes today?” You chuckle, placing a kiss on his forehead, wild curls tickling your nose as you do so. Your voice was still a little raspy, but Kal apparently still heard you, and pushed open the door to come snuggle in bed with his favorite humans. 

“What time is it?” Henry groans. 

“Around 8.”

“We can be busy bees if you want,” Henry whispered against the swell of your breast, peppering delicate kisses on the bare skin. “Or better yet, busy bunnies.”

Kal was now situated on the end of the bed, head on his paws while the serenity of the room made him doze off. His dad on the other hand was now slowly waking up, as his hand crept lower and lower over your body. You giggled and pushed his hand away.

“There is a child present ,” you motion towards a sleeping Kal, who lays stretched out on the feathery duvet, already heading off to dreamland looking content as ever. Henry lifts his head, peering at his buddy and snorts, “he’s seen much worse, haven’t you bear?” But he doesn’t get acknowledged. 

Laying his head back, he reaches up to push your hair out of your face before grabbing your cheek and pulling you down for a kiss. He places three kisses on your swollen lips, lightly sucking on the bottom one.

“May-,” you try to say something, but he just pushes his mouth harder against yours. Quickly taking the opportunity to stop you from making excuses. A hoarse chuckle rumbles from his chest, as he wraps you in his arms.

“Stop talking, woman, and kiss me back.” You let out a small moan and grip the curls you were playing with moments ago. He deepens the kiss slightly, tongue invading your mouth, surprising you. A subdued hum escapes your mouth, resulting in him grabbing the back of your neck, as the other rests on your hip. The kiss gets deeper and more passionate as the minutes go by. Getting a bit overwhelmed you pull back slowly, softy panting. 

“Hmm, so sweet, darling,” he says smugly, earning a little smack to the chest as a bright blush covers your cheeks. Like it wasn’t already hard enough to resist him and stay in the warm bed all morning, he does this. Henry rolls your naked body over so you’re straddling him, a large hand wraps itself around your hair. He tugs, not too hard though, so he has more access to shower open mouthed kisses on your neck and chest. Leaving you a breathless mess on top of him. His hands trail from the top of your back to your rear, squeezing your cheeks before giving them a fast slap, making you take in a breath. 

From all the shuffling, little snickers and kissing noises, Kal woke up and groaned, irritated that his humans couldn’t just hanky-panky somewhere else. With a last disapproving look, he jumps off the bed, landing with a thump. From the sound of paws hitting the wooden floor and toddling down the stairs, you look over your shoulder, duvet falling down so you sat there fully naked, much to Henry’s delight. 

Then you felt it. It was normal for Henry to get hard in the morning. To be honest, he would be a bit worried if his cock wasn’t hard first thing when waking up.

Involuntarily you grind down, drawing a heavy moan from deep in his chest. Holding intense eye contact with him, you start humping over his bare front, mewling like a kitten in heat. It was embarrassing how he had you wrapped around his finger. A cheeky smile formed on his face, “look who came around.” Your body was practically begging for sex. 

Pouting, you keep on moving your hips in a tantalizing slow rhythm, scratching at his hairy chest. Making sure you kept your eyes on his, he licked his three middle fingers and a second later you feel him reaching between your thighs, wiping his fingers down your slit. Tensing up a little, you try to hold back a grunt at the sensation. 

“Oh darling,” he started, his voice going an octave lower, “what a mess you’ve made.”

He pulls back and observes your reaction when he pops his finger in his mouth.

“Wet and sweet, like always.”

“You are so nasty,” you whisper in total awe at what he manages to do to your body. He snickers and you quickly grab his hand, pushing it back between your thighs, “I didn’t tell you to stop, though.”

Your jaw goes slack, the moment you feel his thick fingers moving in and out of you. He was hitting just the right spot, making you groan and throw your head back. He felt like he couldn’t hold back anymore, he quickly flips you over so he’s on top of you, fully trapping you underneath his body and smashes his mouth on yours. Everything was happening so fast that you couldn’t pay attention to every incredible thing he was making you feel. Taking his cock in hand, he rubs his shaft against you, up and down, pressing it so you could feel the length. You look up at him, veins bulging in his neck, eyes dark, face already becoming flushed. God, he was so sexy. Grabbing your legs, he pushes your knees back so you were completely spread open and at his mercy. 

He curses under his breath and lines himself up with you sticky center. Stifling your moans and pants, by pressing his lips to yours, when he slowly sinks his thick cock inside. 

“Oh my god,” you whine, feeling him stretching your walls apart, pushing himself deeper and deeper. 

“Y’feel so warm and tight, my love. M’so hard it hurts.” Henry whines against your lips, lacing his fingers in between yours. He trails kisses in your neck and under your ear, trying to get as close to you as possible. He loved feeling your body against his. Your walls were so plushy and wet for his cock, he wanted to stay buried in you forever. 

“M’gonna make you feel so good, darling,” he whispers in your ear. You whine softly, getting worked up, “please.”

He smirked, obviously liking your plea. 

Instead of giving you a nice, hard pounding, Henry wanted to go slow. It was still very early in the morning, the both of you still barely awake and he wanted to savor this moment with you.

“Oh, Hen-,” you pant softly, loving every bit of it. As he pushes deeper into you, you can feel his entire weight pressing down against you. The weight comforted you in a sense, like others would with a weighted blanket. He prolonged his strokes, making sure that when he slid out you could feel every centimeter of him, but then slid back in quickly. 

“Fuck.” He grumbles into your neck, “feels so good, love,” he praises, nibbling on the skin under your ear, grabbing a handful of your hair pulling it back. You move you hands from his grasp and push them up his broad shoulders, pulling him closer to you.

“So good,” you moan out to him, feeling his cock nudge at the extremely sensitive spot deep inside your core. He lifts his head to look at you, seeing your mouth formed into the letter ‘o’, head tilted back into the cloud-like pillow and eyes screwed shut. A string of desperate moans falls from your lips. 

This was what he loved, seeing his love, his girl react to the way he was pleasuring her. Just looking at you in this state made his orgasm coil up in the pit of his tummy. He never would have dreamed that another person could give him this feeling, the feeling of utter bliss when you were together. The unconditional love he felt for you was indescribable. 

Henry continues to thrust into you and attaches his lips to yours, feeling you squeeze around him. You manage to spread your legs even wider and wrap them securely around his slim waist, digging your heels just above the globes of his perfectly sculpted ass. 

He was aiming his stokes into the deepest part of you and you felt yourself getting closer and closer to your release. 

“Fuck,” you whimper out to him, digging your nails into the skin of his back. He knew you were about to cum. You let out another loud moan. 

“Come on, petal. Cum f’me,” he pants, trying to coax you. Hearing the almost desperate tone in his voice, combined with the sound of him slapping his hips to yours and the feeling of his cock moving in and out of you was becoming overwhelming. 

“Oh my god!” A loud moan ripples through you, the feeling of your release coming near. 

“Almost, my love,” he moans, speeding up the pace of his thrust. He inhales sharply, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulls you up, quickly pounding into you. Completely losing control, trying to get deeper as if that was possible and lets his forehead rest against yours. With one last push of his hips, you get to your breaking point and cum, screaming. Henry feels your walls clamp around him and let’s go, fully satisfied. The noise he made was an orgasm on its own. He keeps himself against you when he lets go inside of you. You could feel Henry’s cum filling you as you slowly come down from your high. You feel his cum dripping out of you, almost proud of what you made him do. 

He is about to roll off of you to cuddle up beside you, but you stop him by tightening your legs around him. “Please stay like this,” you whisper, your brain still a bit muddled by the amazing orgasm you just had seconds ago. He smiles down at you.

“Don’t be a silly goose,” he kisses your nose, “I would crush you,” Henry says endeared with a cheeky grin and pulls you into his side. You feel warm and safe. You yawn, blinking away when your eyes become watery.

“I can’t move,” biting your bottom lip, you snuggle closer to him, “and my throat hurts like hell.”

Henry lowers his hand to your ass and gives it a firm squeeze, “I’m not surprised. Oh doll, the sounds you were making,” he bites his bottom lip, closing his eyes. 

You laugh and roll your eyes. Henry nipped at your neck, making you erupt into a fit giggles. He chuckles, leaving a kiss on the spot he had just bitten. 

Henry trails his hands up and down your back. You closed your eyes and tangle your leg in between his, really liking the feeling. His chest was heavenly and just being in his arms felt amazing. He almost lulled you back to sleep the moment he began to run his fingers through your hair. 

“That good, huh? Almost fucked you back to sleep,” he chuckles. 

“It was alright, I guess,” you tease him. He raises his eyebrows, eyes twinkling with joy. 

“How would you rate the experience?” 

Tilting your head to look up at him, “Hmm, ten I guess.”

He looked very pleased with that.

“Out of twenty,” you finish. 

“OUT OF TWENTY?” He sobered up, staring at your face with a shocked expression. 

You snicker, climbing into his lap, “No, honey, I was just joking, I’m sorry.” A big pout forming on your face, making you look oh so innocent. 

“If you keep looking at me like that, I’m going to put you up on all fours and take you like that, don’t tempt me,” he says, shaking his head. Wiggling your brows you grin and kiss the dimple on his chin. 

“As much as I would enjoy that, I think Kal has to go potty and we have to eat.”

After some hushed pillow talk and hoarse giggles between the silky sheets, you two decide to move downstairs and start making some fresh coffee. When you lift your body out of the bed, a light throbbing shoots between your legs. You almost fall back into the mattress, making Henry roar with laughter. You end up getting a piggy back ride down the stairs, only wearing a v-neck shirt from Henry that fell just below the curve of your ass and showed plenty of cleavage. Your lilac panties were fully on display and your almost black hair looked like a lion’s main on top of your head, but you didn’t care. 

The both of you were still in that bubbly, fulfilled state of mind, looking like two drugged out kids, wearing blissful smiles. When you got to the kitchen, Kal bounded around the corner, coming from the sitting area, his tail wildly sweeping through the air. Eyes sparkling with happiness when he saw his parents finally had left the bed. 

“早上，宝宝” (morning, baby) You greet him, still on Henry’s back. Kal gives you a high “woof” as to say good morning back. After living with Henry and Kal for around eight months now, the akita started to pick up on a few Chinese phrases. He even decided the pet name ‘宝宝’ (bao bao), which means baby or darling, was only to be applied on him and nobody else. 

Every time you would video call with your Chinese speaking friends, and they talked about or to their children, Kal would cheerfully patter over, thinking they were cooing at him instead of the small infant in the background. But you thought it was the sweetest thing ever, he was your little fur baby after all. 

“I’m going to make us some omelets, is that alright with you, darling,” Henry asked, already opening the fridge and looking for the carton of eggs.

“Yeah, ‘course,” you call out to him. You give Kal his breakfast and receive many, wet kisses in return. Shuffling back over to your boyfriend, you lean against the dark green counter with its wooden countertops, and look at him carefully chopping up some bell peppers and onion, only wearing his joggers and a tank top. You were a lucky girl, and you knew it. Henry sends you a grin and winks before turning back to cutting the vegetables.

You begin to brew some fresh coffee for Henry, and put on the kettle for your morning tea. While he was finishing up breakfast, you start to read the newspaper to him. He absolutely adored it when you’d read to him, due to your accent becoming more noticeable. Kal came over to you, stuffing his wet nose against the hand you held out to him. “You’re such a good boy, Kal. Yes, you are,” you tell him in a baby voice, “you’re my little angel aren’t you? 我的小天使” 

You clean the table, after eating your breakfast and get ready for the day. Henry was already out to go on a walk with Kal. It did indeed snow last night and everything outside was hidden underneath a thin sheet of white snow, so you made sure Henry was wrapped up in a thick scarf you made him and a black beanie. After giving you a kiss as if he was off to fight in a war, he and Kal happily walked through the front door, into the freezing cold. Him whistling and Kal buzzing with excitement. 

Brushing your teeth and doing your makeup, you dance through the bathroom, in a good mood. You grab your phone that was propped up against the mirror, planning to put on the podcast you had been enjoying lately. You freeze seeing all the notifications, not having heard your phone due to it being on ‘quiet’. You swallow.

Oh shit.

There you were, plastered on the internet for everyone to see and laugh at. You and Henry making out on the parking lot of the Chinese supermarket. Was he going to be angry with you? It was your fault for teasing him after all. Oh no no no…

‘Henry Cavill and girlfriend were spotted having a steamy make out session outside local grocery store’

The headline read, making your face as red as a tomato. Trying to fight against it, you couldn’t hold yourself from reading the next paragraph. 

Being in the middle of winter, doesn’t stop these two lovebirds from having a heated make out session in a parking lot!

Yesterday early in the evening, Witcher-superstar Henry Cavill was spotted with (to some) much younger girlfriend, designer, Y/N Y/L/N. The two have  recently confirmed their relationship with an Instagram post from Cavill, showing a candid of Y/N, with the short caption ‘My sunshine enjoying the sun shine’. Last month Vogue came out with a video featuring Y/L/N in which Cavill and his dog Kal made an appearance, making fans go wild. It seems like the two really are living the life and we are excited to see more of them together!

Want to know more about the stars? Subscribe to STAR NEWS! 

This was it. You could already hear your sweet grandma, praying to the ancestors to forgive you for your sins, lighting all the incense she could find. You were a disgrace to the family now. It wasn’t that you were ashamed or felt bad about doing it, hell, everybody in the position would gladly sit on Henry’s shoulders and stick their tongue down his throat. You were just disappointed you got caught.

From downstairs you hear the door close with a loud thump and the pitter-patter from Kal’s nails on the hardwood floor, letting you know your two boys were back home. You nervously descend the flight of stairs, holding your head low and tightly clutching your phone in hand. 

“Hey, lovey! you really missed something, Kal and I could practically ice skate over the walking trails, it was so much fun!” Henry says enthusiastically as he hears you wander into the living room. You ignore him and plop down on the couch.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, not meeting his eyes. 

A frown makes its way onto his face. 

“What are you sorry for, sweet girl?” His eyes hold a concerned look, not understanding what you were talking about. You huff out a breath and hand him your phone so he could see the article. 

A roaring laugh sounds through the open space, making your head shoot up. “Yeah, I saw it this morning when I went and checked my Instagram,” he chuckles, face still rosy from going outside. 

“We really gave the paparazzi a field day, didn’t we?” He continues.

“Your ass looks great in this pic, though. Look,” pointing to the one were he had you lifted over his shoulder, but softens his voice when he sees how tense you were. 

“Aw, doll, loosen up, I’m not mad or anything, if that’s what you think. I’m rather pleased now that everybody can see how happy we are and how much joy you bring me,” he lets you know nonchalantly, pressing a smooch to your forehead and starts to march towards the kitchen.

“You want another cuppa, lovey?”

And just like that, you were back in your good mood, perplexed at how well he took all of this. 

Don’t be a silent reader! Show some love by reblogging and commenting, did it make you laugh, scream, smile? Let me know, it would make my day!

Much love, Nahmi xxx

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[canmom]

Toku Tuesday 46 - Stephen Chow (周星馳)

Hi friends. Welcome back to Toku Tuesday.

I’m not going to write a huge amount tonight because I’m still pretty numb from losing Fall. But, in the interests of spending time with people and having something light-hearted, tonight if you would join me we’ll be watching some of the films of Stephen Chow/周星馳 (Jāu Sīngchìh) - WP says ‘Stephen Chow’ is his ‘professional’ name so let’s go with that...

Chow was born in Hong Kong in 1962, so during the long period of British occupation (c.f. TT #32). Imspired by Bruce Lee’s The Big Boss (1971) to aspire to martial arts stardom, he went straight into broadcaster TVB’s acting school straight out of secondary school, worked his way up from being an extra to presenting an astronomy program, and eventually got his break to star in over 40 films starting from Final Justice (1988), becoming one of the major martial arts stars of the 90s.

But we’re not here to talk about his acting! Because as a director, Stephen Chow is known for quite a particular thing: effects-heavy kung fu comedies such as Shaolin Soccer (少林足球, 2001) and especially Kung Fu Hustle (功夫, Kung Fu, 2004). These films are remarkable for being live action that feels a lot like highly stylised animation in its sense of timing and 2D composition.

Let’s not pigeonhole him too narrowly though! Look it up and you find that Chow’s got a pretty long list of director credits, starting with James Bond parody From Beijing With Love (國產凌凌漆, The Domestically Produced 007, 1994) about an 007-like spy defending China from a which ironically ended up banned by the CCP for its depiction of corruption; continuing with Forbidden City Cop (大內密探零零發 Imperial Secret Agent 008) and The God of Cookery (食神) both in 1996, and King of Comedy (喜劇之王) in 1999.

All of these movies star Chow himself, and it sounds like they tend to be heavy on the Cantonese puns. The God of Cookery for example stars a character whose name has the same pronunciation as Stephen Chow’s, but different characters. Perhaps because this proved a little hard to translate, they were popular in China but it would be Shaolin Soccer that got wildly popular abroad, perhaps because its premise is very clear and funny (a Shaolin monk plays football shot like supernatural martial arts) and that was enough of a hook to get people in where they could enjoy Chow’s excellent editing and visual humour - plus as I recall you don’t really need to know shit about football. Same went for Kung Fu Hustle, which can be easily approached as a kind of parody of kung fu and gangster movies, although it works because it succeeds very well as a kung fu movie. (Someone with more literacy in the genre could probably write a more thorough account of its influences and specific allusions... alas that is not me tonight.)

And since then, what’s Chow been up to? C7J (長江七號) (2008) was the last one in which Chow acts as well as directs, following a construction worker’s son adopting an alien - kind of ET-like premise. It proved rather less accessible to the critics, but I’d very much like to track it down because it sounds pretty fascinating. Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons ( 西遊·降魔篇)(2013) was described to me by @mogsk​ as a really fun take on the story of Saiyuki; The Mermaid (美人鱼, 2016) is a romantic comedy with the amazing premise of a mermaid assassin. I definitely plan to get all of those movies on a future Toku Tuesday.

Tonight the plan is to do something light-hearted and watch Shaolin Soccer and Kung Fu Hustle. We’ll be starting in about half an hour so please come in to twitch.tv/canmom and get comfortable!