so the party manifestos won’t be published for a few weeks prolly, but the Labour Party policymaking system means they have an internal “policy platform” agreed by the partisan structure that kinda dictates what goes in the manifesto, and a similar partisan structure has the final say on the manifesto itself. the platform is private and internal, but it’s been “seen and summarised”. so heres a couple of interesting bits:
nationalise the rail; allow greater municipal ownership of bus networks; more ev charging stations and increased ev subsidies
“fundamentally reform our system of energy supply, generation and transmission” via public ownership, but without stating whether or not this includes consumer services or if the private wholesale system will continue
abolish the Lords; votes at 16; NO commitment to abolishing FPTP
“support the recognition of” palestine (note wording, and note the fact this was written before 7 october)
ban conversion therapy including for trans people; “modernise the process of gender recognition to remove indignities for trans people, while upholding the Equality Act, its protected characteristics and its provision for single-sex exemptions” (obviously using terf dogwhistles to get out of meaningfully reforming the law, without clarifying their plans)
sewage monitoring and fines for sewage leaks by water companies – water remains private
“land-use framework” to organise farmland with the goal of biodiversity, close hunting loopholes
intellectual property reform, maybe? they’re very vague about that one
one-month waiting time for mental health services
“reform broken tuition fees system” – NO commitment to abolition and debt forgiveness, only this squirmy line
“robust regulation to protect people from online harms” – basically equivocating to allow any possible passage of a bad internet bill :/
£28B green energy investment; double onshore wind, quadruple offshore wind; reinstate fracking ban and stop new oil/gas; “green energy by 2030”, whatever that means. weirdly fetishistic about hydrogen power
VERY, VERY little mention of City oversight and reform. City to remain extremely independent, capital to continue flowing
abolish leaseholds; end ‘arcane’ land laws; end no-fault evictions
football regulator; reform gambling laws
end fire-rehire; more regulation for two-tier employee/contractor workplace inequalities; more statutory workers’ rights; ban zerohours with more than 12h/week, “right to a contract”; change the minimum wage quango to account for cost of living, potentially hiking the minimum wage by several pounds
repeal a number of union-busting acts; regulate gig economies to statutorily allow the right to unionise; increase rights for unions to organise and manage themselves
ethics quango to enforce the ministerial code for the first time in its history; ban second jobs for MPs with very limited exceptions for professionals; ban former ministers from lobbying for five years; political finance reforms to restrict financing by shell companies
certain devolutionary powers for english local authorities on request; shrink whitehall, let the civil service go elsewhere
“respect orders”, ASBOs 2; domestic abuse register; misogyny as a hatecrime; ‘protect the right to protest’, explicitly opposing the public order bill without committing to overturn it
but yeah, the starmer leadership may leave some things on the cutting room floor, and the starmer government may act totally different when it doesn’t have the partisan oversight. in the end, we have to wait until the proper manifesto releases to make real judgements, but looking through this list can set the tone of our expectations: third-way, boring and pathetic
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807 words, prompt: Hallway, @jegulus-microfic
cw: codependency, the relationship can be read as toxic but it’s not meant to be, angst w/ a happy ending, fighting (not physical), unhealthy coping mechanisms, implied past nsfw. It sounds worse than it is, I’m just covering my bases here, I promise it’s happy at the end.
Regulus doesn’t even remember what they were fighting about. Probably something small, it always is; James is too hot-headed and Regulus is too stubborn. Neither can admit that they’re wrong until they’re yelling in the kitchen saying words they don’t mean.
Until James walks out the door and Regulus sits in the front hallway pathetically awaiting his return, if he returns at all. Everytime James slams the door behind him, Regulus wonders if it’s for the last time; if he was too cruel, too anxious, too sad, too Regulus for James to keep loving him.
But still he waits because he can’t sleep, he can’t eat, he needs James like stars need hydrogen. And he knows logically that it isn’t healthy, that James shouldn’t be able to have this much of an effect on him, but it’s James. His Jamie.
Normally Regulus sits in a chair and reads. When James walks in the door they drag one another upstairs pulling clothes off and kissing marks into skin, apologizing but not really fixing anything.
This time Regulus trails after him and when the door slams shut he can only slide down the wall. Sobs wracking his body, convinced the sun has left for good.
That’s how James finds him an hour later when he walks through the front door, eyes flicking to the arm chair in the corner before finding Regulus curled up on the floor. Still gasping for air and tears down his face, but no longer crying.
One look at him and James immediately walks back out the front door. Regulus is sure James is leaving him now, and those little sniffles turn back into full body sobs.
Too much.
To cruel.
Too anxious.
Too sad.
Too Regulus.
He can’t communicate. He can’t be good. He can’t love James right. He can’t… he can’t… he…
Too much and never enough.
When James walks in the door for a second time an hour later, Regulus’s head hurts ten times worse than it did an hour ago, his lungs ache and his throat is sore.
James automatically sits down and pulls Regulus into his lap, gently rubbing circles on his back, scratching the back of his head with other hand.
“Reggie, I need to talk to you about something.” He whispers gently. “We can’t keep doing this, it isn’t healthy.”
Regulus immediately stiffens and grips onto the front of James’s shirt. Desperate to keep him close, to keep him here.
“We argue about the dumbest things, then we fight about it. I run off and you sit waiting for me, and when I do get back we just go fuck and don’t even talk about our problems or why we were fighting in the first place.”
“I know bu-“
“I signed up for a therapist, who I’ll be seeing weekly. I don’t ever want to be reason you’re crying on the floor of our entry hall. I want to be good enough for you and love you the way you deserved to be loved. And you don’t deserve being yelled at and abandoned. I love you so fucking much and I’m going to work to be better for you so we can work out because you are by far the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I can’t lose you.”
It’s silent in the hallway. After what has to have been ages, it was only a few minutes, James thinks Regulus has fallen asleep so he gets ready to bring Regulus up to bed.
Regulus murmurs against James’s chest.
“What was that, mis Estrella?”
Regulus pulls back a bit.
“I’ll go too, to therapy I mean. This isn’t just your fault. I know I’m fucked up. I know that. And I’m so sorry. For everything. For every time I didn’t just let shit go. For every time i was so so cruel to you. For every time I made it hard to love me. So I’ll go to therapy too, I think I’m finally ready to accept that I need it.”
If James had the smallest morsel of doubt about his decision before it’s completely gone now. He knows that Regulus wants this relationship to work just as much as he does; that some of his friends were wrong when they said it would be better to breakup, that he was fighting for a dead relationship.
“You’re not hard to love Reg. Loving you has to be the easiest thing I’ve ever done.” And it is, James isn’t lying.
“I love you, Jamie, more than anything.” Regulus has never meant something more.
“I know, my love,” James kisses the top of his head, “go to sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up.”
And Regulus does, he falls asleep and wakes up in James’s arms and he continues to do so for the rest of eternity.
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The Woeful Tale of Tavish 2
Day 2: FREE DAY (Boots N Bombs)
A plume of water shoots into the air like the great mushroom cloud of a hydrogen bomb. The thing is probably releasing hydrogen into the air, tearing water molecules to bits and doing all sorts of other mini reactions, but Demo doesn’t have the brain space he usually reserves for keeping track of chemical combustion; he is too full of overwhelming relief for that.
“And tell Davy Jones I’m coming for him next!” he bellows across the loch.
The corpse of the great plesiosaur is already mostly below the waterline. The day is warm and sunny. A group of tourists are screaming in horror. Or maybe they’re screaming because the resounding shockwaves are threatening to tip their boat over, Demo doesn’t care much, not when satisfaction blooms in his chest with each small wave that reaches his shoes.
“I did it,” he says with pride. “I finally did it.”
“That you did private!” Soldier says. “A job well done. Isn’t it great that all your childhood trauma could be tied up neatly with one explosive act of violence?”
“It is! So glad it’s that easy, and with no lingering complications.”
“And people always say to go to therapy.”
“Load of bollox that.”
“Mwuuaag.”
“…Mwuaag?” Demo asks. “What does mwuaag mean?”
“What?” Soldier scratches his helmet. “I didn’t say that.”
“Mwuuaag…” the mournful lament comes again.
The pair of men glance around, noticing nothing out of place but themselves, washed up chunks of dinosaur, and the several crates of spare explosives they’d brought along for the job. But the damp air contains crying still, and the pair of mercenaries follow it around the bend to find the source.
An amphibious creature about the size of a punch buggy lifts its head at their approach. It blinks for a second with large, cow-like eyes. Then cheered by their appearance, it says, “Oooaaan!” and slaps its flippers excitedly in the (slightly pinkish) shallows.
“…Fuck,” Demo says.
“Tavish look!” Soldier says. “It’s a baby nessie.”
“I can see it’s a baby nessie Jane.”
“You probably just blew up her mother,” Soldier hums thoughtfully.
“Aye. I gathered. And don’t go calling it ‘she’!” Demo warns. “I know you, and that’s always your first step in getting attached. We’re not taking on responsibility for this thing.”
Soldier, in a bout of speed he only exhibits when rockets or pathetic animals are involved, is already up and snuggling the monster.
“Tavish,” Soldier says, aghast. “We killed her mother! We are now duty-bound to take her in. Just like in Bambi!”
“They didn’t- ach,” Demo says. “No, no way. Don’t want that thing anywhere near me.”
“Mwuuaag?” The baby plesiosaur loops its long neck over the Soldier, craning so it can properly tilt its head at Demo.
“You heard me!”
“But why?” Soldier asks.
“I tell you why, because that-” Demo points to the several-ton infant, “-is the spawn of that-” he points to the origin of the explosion, where there is now only a capsized tourist dinghy. “My mortal enemy! The creature that caused me years of torment!”
“I thought Merasmus was your mortal enemy.”
“Well,” Demo says. “He is now. But only because he’s immortal and hard to get rid of. But before him it was that thing, the one who killed my bloody parents!”
The creature, noting Demo’s finger, scoots closer to him and noses his hand for treats. Demo scoffs, and folds his arms.
Soldier thinks long and hard about this, looking at the little nessie, then the big, dead Nessie out in the loch.
Slowly, he says, “Okay. I respect your wishes, and will make sure you absolutely do not come in contact with her for the foreseeable future.”
“…Why did you say it like that.”
“No reason, let’s go, I love you.”
🦕
Demo knows there’s something amiss as soon as he hears cooing coming from the cargo hold. It’s a decent sized plane, but that doesn’t mean it's big enough to keep secrets from each other. He walks in to find Soldier murmuring to himself and slipping bananas under a large, conspicuously shaped sheet.
“Jane!” Demo barks. “I told you to leave that bloody thing back in Scotland.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Soldier yelps, whipping the bunch of bananas behind his back.
The effect is somewhat spoiled as a green, scaly muzzle pokes itself from beneath the sheet and nibbles at them.
“What about no more infant predators don’t you understand?” Demo demanded. “A puma was bad enough but this? Not to mention it’s a deadly beast with a personal grudge against me.”
“She doesn’t have anything personal against you, you just have something personal against her. It’s not her fault her mother…um. Was so nefarious she tricked you into killing your adoptive parents?”
Demo is not in the mood to go over this again. He glares.
“I mean just look at her Tavish.” Soldier rips off the sheet. The plesiosaur flaps its flippers in delight, impressed by the magic trick of suddenly making everything not-dark anymore. “How can you say no to that face?”
“No,” Demo tells the pair of beaming expressions.
“Mwuuaag?”
But the puppy-eyes looks so damn heartbroken on its canine face that Demo can’t help but feel his heartstrings twist like a puppet. He dismisses the notion immediately, reminding himself of reality.
“Yes, mwuuag,” he says. “I mean, Christ Jane, look at the size of it! What were you even planning on doing with it once we touched down?”
“Well, I found out she likes bananas, so that’s food settled.” Soldier scratches his chin. “And uh, she could live in the pool. I promise I’ll clean it every day!”
“This isn’t a debate, Jane. That…that thing…I don’t want to be near it. This is supposed to be over, don’t you understand?” Demo feels his throat clench. “This trip was…was supposed to fix everything.”
“…Tav. I don’t think everything is going to be fixed even if she does go back.”
Demo clenches his hands, unclenches them. Does that a few times. There are no windows in the cargo hold, but he glances to the side and feels the rickety hum of the plane around.
“She’s also,” Soldier says, poignantly, “a newly made orphan due to an explosion related event. Do you really want to send her back to that ridiculous, un-American island.”
Demo drops his arms to his sides. “…Ach….no, I guess I don’t really.”
“Oooaaan!”
“That doesn’t mean I’m going to be happy about this!” He points an accusing finger at the creature. “I’m just going along with this until we can find a good spot to release you. Because that’s where wild animals go, aye?”
This last part he directs to Soldier, who deflates somewhat but doesn’t protest.
“Okay,” he says. “As long as we find some place close enough to visit every now and then…”
Demo sighs, already feeling like he’s given an inch and is about to be shoved back a whole mile off a cliff.
🦕
“Don’t worry Tavish 2, we’ll find you a nice lake soon enough.”
“What?” Demo says, glancing over his shoulder.
“Not you!” Soldier replies. “I was talking to Tavish 2.”
Soldier is scratching the monster under the chin. They’ve forcefully commandeered one of the motel’s food trolleys in order to cart her around, but even still her size is squashing the axles to a near standstill, and the view of her takes up the entire hall. The sight fills Demo with irritation.
“You named the nessie Tavish?” he grouses.
“It’s a good name! Besides, I thought it might help you warm up to her. One of those, uh, positive association things.”
“Right,” Demo huffs under his breath. “Because the one thing I’m famous for is liking myself.” Louder, he adds, “Let’s just get a move on, aye?”
They’ve been trying to get down to the pool for ten minutes now, Tavish 2’s trolley not making that any easier. Tavish had wanted to leave her in the hotel room, but Jane wasn’t having any of it.
“…Why don’t I just go on ahead, eh?” he says after watching Soldier bang into the same jutting radiator for the eleventh time. “Save us some good spots.”
In reality, Demo just wants to escape. When he finally makes it down to the motel’s ground floor, he doesn’t even head to the pool. He instead slips into the hot tub, throwing his towel on a random folding chair to hide his trail, and tries to let the stresses of the past few days melt away.
The hot chlorine smell alights his sinuses, but it's cleansing in its own way. The bubbles tickle up beneath him, and he leans his neck back over the side, trying to forget everything. The stupid dinosaur, the bloody loch, everything that led him up to this point.
It’s over. He can relax.
He’s almost dozed off in the comforting embrace of the hot tub when a voice next to his ear asks, “Oooaaan?”
“Fuck!” he yelps, splashing away from the scaly snout now inches from his face.
Tavish 2 brays and slaps her flippers against the concrete. It feels like she’s laughing at him.
“Yeah yeah, yuck it up,” Tavish growls. “Where’s Jane? You didn’t eat him did you?”
The nessie only moos again. Soldier doesn’t make an appearance.
Demo is deciding whether to try and get the thing to go away on his own or to locate Soldier and make him do it for him, when the decision is taken out of his hands. The creature begins slipping into the hot tub with him, easing in like a Great Dane if a Great Dane was the size of a subcompact.
“Oi! No you bloody don’t!”
Demo tries to leap out of the way, but it’s no use. Within seconds, the nessie is partially on his lap, causing hot tub water to slosh over the sides. (He’s lucky it’s only partially; if she were any more on him he’d probably be crushed to death.)
“I mean it! …You!” He frowns. “I’m not calling you that ridiculous name.”
She cocks her head for a moment, then submerges it completely.
“I know you can still hear me down there.”
One second. Then two. Then, suddenly she begins to blow bubbles out of her nose.
Demo can’t help it. He laughs. He laughs and he laughs and suddenly this horrible, stressful week seems so funny he might just cry. So he does.
That’s how Soldier finds him several minutes later, weeping openly and holding the head of Tavish 2 in his arms. She’s wiggling, but although she could probably rip her beachball-sized noggin away with ease, she doesn’t—instead she keeps it there, mooing consolingly, and letting Demo cry.
“Are you okay?” Soldier asks, crouching down by the hot tub’s edge. “Is she bothering you again?”
“No she’s…” Demo sniffs. “She’s fine. I’m fine.”
“Oooaaan,” Tavish 2 agrees.
Soldier scratches his helmet, still worn with his swim trunks. “Alright. If you say so.”
With that, he manages to find the last few inches of unoccupied hot tub and squeeze in, and the three begin to properly enjoy their vacation for the first time.
🦕
They spend the last few days of furlough driving around various tourist traps in New Mexico. Soldier buys a Polaroid camera. They take photos of the three of them in Roswell, at Fox Cave, in front of the World’s Largest Pistachio Nut. Soldier sifts through them fondly whenever he’s not driving.
“Guess we’re nearing the end of the road, huh?” Soldier says wistfully. “It was a good trip! We did our nation proud! But I should pick out someplace we can re-home Tavish 2.”
“…Right,” Demo says, not taking his eye off the road.
“Don’t worry!” Soldier assures. “I promise not to make it a whole production. You were right. She belongs in the wild.”
“Right. I’m right. ‘Bout that.” Demo says it all with a straight face, gripping the steering wheel tightly.
However, when they finally pull over the gravel lake Soldier has selected and begin un-bungeeing Tavish 2 from the roof of the car, Demo breaks down.
“We- we can’t send her away now, can we?” he asks. “Not after we brought her all this way! It’s not fair…”
“There there private,” Soldier says, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. “We can still come and visit any time.”
Tavish 2, now landbound, noses Demo’s ear.
“It won’t be the same,” he admits.
“It has to be this way, private,” Soldier says. “She will be much happier here, and she’ll become the apex predator of the gravel sea. Plus, I ran out of bananas a few days ago and I think she’s going to resort to human flesh if we’re not careful.”
“…I know,” Demo finally admits. He turns. “It’s been. Good knowing you lass. But Jane’s right. Time for you to head for grey-er pastures.”
Tavish 2 doesn’t move.
“Oi! I said it’s time to get a move on! Don’t roll over my emotional revelation by jes’ standing there!”
Tavish 2 bays, and sniffs them both for treats.
“I’ve seen this in movies,” Soldier says. “You have to toss things at her until she goes away.”
Frustrated, Demo digs out a novelty bag of pistachios from the trunk, and hurls it at the plesiosaur. It lands pathetically a foot away with a dusty thump.
Demo falls to his knees and wails, “I can’t toss, Jane! You know I’m shite at tossing! That’s while I’m always holding the bloody caber.”
Soldier sits next to him.
“It’s okay Tavish. You can be embarrassingly bad at tossing. I love you anyway.”
“It’s just,” Demo cries into his hands. “She’s such a noble and majestic creature and I’ve never bonded with anything like this before and-”
He lifts his head out of his hands.
“Where the bloody hell did she go?”
“Hm? Oh, she saw something yellow in the gravel pit and went to go check it out. But if you want to keep with your emotional catharsis, I’ll be here, listening.”
“Ach, no, it’s not the same.” Demo stands, and dusts off his pants. “S’pose we should be heading back to our bases then. But you know the one thing about this trip?”
“What?” Soldier asks as they head back to the car.
“No one’s going to believe a word of it.”
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