#human announcer

[blue-inferno]

Scheduled Post

My version of a human Announcer, after completing a core version.

[nota-deviant]

(Omg I wrote something)

It was a command Stanley had heard before many times

*Stanley walked through the door on his left*

that didn't mean he was going to follow it. The brunette smiled to himself as he heard the telltale groan come from the Narrator, hand sliding against the wall as he followed the familiar route

"Haven't you gone this way enough?"

Narrator huffed out, the shuffling of papers being picked up on the speakers

"Every secret, every achievement, every reward…you've gotten it all Stanley!"

Stanley didn't respond…it wasn't like he could. Besides…this reset felt different from all the rest. Something felt amiss, though that didn't mean it was bad

Stanley dragged his hand across the wall, the Narrator silent above him and only speaking as he entered the employee lounge

"How peculiar.."

He man looked up curiously at the speakers and tilted his head, silence coming from above.

That's when he noticed it..the large box that leaned inconspicuously by the vending machine. It certainly didn't look like aby office supplies…a printer maybe? No, it was too small for that

"This is all part of the plan Stanley!"

The Narrator cleared his throat

"Stanley walked up to the peculiar box. Something new and definitely planned from his Narrator!"

Stanley raised a brow and silently shuffled over, his hand reaching out to feel for the end of the packaging tape that sat securely on the box

"Well go ahead Stanley."

Stanley dug his nail in to the end of the brown tape and peeled it back, flinching as something shifted within the box

"What is- I mean..Stanley, undeterred by the strange movement, continued to open the box."

Stanley huffed and leaned forward a small amount, standing on his tip toes before immediately falling back as a head popped out of the multicolored packing peanuts

Everyone was silent, Stanley's face contorted in a look at distress and confusion as he stared at the brown haired man

"Well..this doesn't seem to be the studio.."

Stanley had never seen another living thing before…sure he had heard different voices but actually being able to see someone? It was something he never thought he'd get to experience

The Narrator remained silent

"You don't talk much do you? That's alright! I've got- WOAH!"

The box fell forward and with it the man, Stanley stepping back as the small spectacles fell near his feet

"Darned box…I told Banana sleeping in it was a bad idea but he just had to insist!"

Stanley pursed his lips, multicolored eyes looking up at him and squinting as they set on the glasses in Stanley's hands

"Ah! There they are!"

Stanley stepped back as the man moved closer, hands shaky as they kept a hold on the glasses

Narrator had yet to say a word

Stanley hoped he would..

"Oh?..there's no need to be afraid.."

His movements became more steady, eyes still squinting in order to set on Stanley

"You've got my glasses there.."

Stanley glanced down and swallowed down the lump in his throat. He could do this! It was only the first human contact he had had in the life he could remember

The man smiled and reached his hand out in a friendly manner, Stanley's own hands reaching out to place the glasses in to the others hands

"**Stanley**"

Stanley's face paled at the static tone of his Narrators voice

[specsthesecond]

°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°

This time, you're roused from sleep by the sound of deep snoring coming from the orc under you. You blink away sleep and adjust slightly on the orc's massive chest, resisting the soothing lull of his slow breaths tempting you back to sleep.

He has an arm around your back, unconsciously keeping you against his chest. You lean up, as much as you can manage, on your elbows to gaze at the sleeping giant. You never thought the word pretty could possibly be used to describe an orc, but when you see the way his eyelashes flutter in sleep, you second guess that notion entirely.

His stubble is scruffy and unkempt just like his hair but it doesn't look dirty. His pitch black mane looks so soft you want to run your fingers through it and that fleeting thought shocks you so much you almost fall off the orc's chest.

Luckily he seems to be a rather deep sleeper, he only mumbles something in Orcish and pulls your body closer to his in his sleep. You try desperately to ignore the fire his touch lights under your skin. You're actually not sure if you've ever been this close to someone else before, and that thought makes you unreasonably angry. You're not some puritan who shies away from bodily desires. You've just never been good at getting close enough to people to experience it. Nobody chooses to live alone in the woods if they're good with people.

You adjust your hands under you, moving your open palm to where his heart should be. You feel the steady movement of his chest going up and down and it dawns on you, you'd completely forgotten what it's like to have a warm, breathing body next to you.

And just like that, the ugly inkling that's been haunting you all these years is confirmed, you do crave intimacy. No matter how much you ignore it, you're weak and lonely. Hell, you're so desperate, you'd seek out the touch of an Orc of all beings!

You feel one pathetic tear trickle down your cheek and you quickly wipe it away. Your fingers lightly brush his soft tunic, seeking heat from the warm skin just underneath. You place your palm flat, letting his heartbeat soothe you again. Your fingers trace the hem of his tunic, where the white cotton meets his hair-covered green chest.

The feeling in your fingers has returned, just enough to really feel how soft his skin is. You slowly trail your fingertips up to where his stubble begins on his throat. This type of intimacy is so distant from what you know and it causes another pang in your heart.

You lightly brush the bristly hair, you'd always thought orcs would have abysmal hygiene but his stubble feels clean, if unkempt. There isn't much reason to shave or look presentable when you live alone in the woods, you know that much. Your eyes follow the trail up past his chin to his lips, way too soft-looking for an orc. You get a closer look at the carvings on his tusks but it doesn't help you discern what exactly the carvings depict or what they mean. Your eyes flick up, back to his pretty lashes and meet his dark brown irises, they glow so nicely in the fireligh-

Shock electrocutes your body and you jolt away from him with a speed like lightning. You stare wide-eyed at his very awake self and embarrassment runs through you like you've never felt before. He sits up, clearly startled at the speed you jumped away from him. You can't look at him, the concern in his eyes only mortifies you further. You desperately look around the room for anything else to focus on and you spot the rest of your clothes still on the rack next to the hearth.

You stumble to your feet, a numb pain still gnaws at your muscles but it feels just like the pain of a long hike, almost familiar. You reach for your two pairs of thick socks and starts pulling them on one by one. The orc, still sitting on the floor, only seems to realize what you're doing when you start slipping your snow boots on. He springs up and heads to the kitchen, where you hear clattering and water boiling. You slip on the rest of your clothes, tucking everything in super tight for extra protection. A good while must have passed because even your fur coat is completely dry, you drape it over your shoulders, followed lastly by your thick scarf. You walk a few laps in front of the hearth, stretching out your unused muscles for the trek back home. When you think you're ready to leave, you awkwardly stand in the middle of the living room, gaze flicking from the front door to the kitchen.

Why are you waiting? You shouldn't even be here. You take only one step towards the door when the orc comes back with a flask in his hands. He rather bluntly holds it out for you to take and you do. Looking from him to the flask, you open it to catch a scent of what's inside. As you guessed, it was the spicy honey tea he had served you before, you close the lid tight before your mouth starts to water.

You look up at him, unsure of what to do or say. Neither of you have said a word to each other, You don't expect him to know Human Common and you guessed he doesn't expect you to know Orcish. You decide on nodding your head low, in what you hope comes across as an expression of appreciation. Apparently it does because he nods back to you with an expression you don't really understand, like he wants to smile but he's sad.

He steps outside with you, you can tell even through the clouds that it's daytime now and you once again wonder how long you spent cuddled up with this orc. He walks out into the snow and leads you to the edge of the little clearing around his home. He points in the direction you need to go, apparently trusting that you can find your way back. You definitely can, and you appreciate his acknowledgement of this, nodding to him once more before walking off into the woods, eager to get back home.

You only look back once, when his stone cottage is almost out of sight, he stands on the veranda, watching you leave and for some reason you find it endearing. He's truly just letting you go, after saving your life, feeding you and giving you shelter he's really not going to ask for anything in return?

You sigh to yourself, knowing it will weigh heavy on your conscience if you don't do something for this kind stranger in return.

°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❆⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°

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[doe-prince]

How Humans Court is a short comic idea that keeps bothering me from time to time. Maybe one day I'll have the time and juice to seriously work on it.

The story would follow a mule deer doe who comes across a decapitated stag, and their little quest to find his head. The normal stuff.

[starleska]

(spoilers for Finding Frankie!) here is the Contestant's entire encounter with Frankie - huge thanks to The Game Archivist for the no-commentary game footage 🔥💖

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #151

There is a LOT of Iron Man merch out there. One day, Stark Industries comes out with a line of Iron Man themed night lights that look like arc reactors. The marketing? "For kids who are scared of the dark: Iron Man will protect you."

In completely unrelated news, a whole bunch of child abusers across the country have recently been arrested as a result of  anonymous tips to local authorities.

Bonus:

It's an open secret at some point. Teens who are being abused start buying the night lights. Hell, adults start buying them. Charities pop up to cover the cost for anyone who needs it. Kids who are newly safe often send their night lights on to others ("I'm not scared of the dark anymore," they say).

Even with all of this, nobody snitches to the media or government. They all know grown-ups tend to complicate and ruin precious things.

It helps that the night lights clearly can distinguish between different types of situations. Kids whose parents need mental health or addiction support suddenly find they're being contacted by free services that actually help. If ICE is a concern, the people knocking on the door are not cops but immigrant rights activists. Kids who are hungry get food. Families who need housing support coincidentally find it.

"Iron Man will protect you," indeed.

This fic idea was inspired by this post from @fotibrit!!

[seriouslycalamitous]

CHAPTER 9 - THE FINALE OF MY GOD!SCAR x MORTAL!GRIAN FIC IS HERE!! THE END!!

Title: Be the Death of Me

71K Words

9/9 Chapters

Deity AU, DesertDuo

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/59967808/chapters/152993515

[ladyluckylu]

HENREH

[sentientsky]

so something happened this morning. don’t know if u guys saw or whatever.

[qussymagnet]

QUARK PUSSY

If you are in the United States, please go vote! No matter what, please go vote! I'm begging you!

QUARK PUSSY

[nota-deviant]

Forget any other drawings from before, Narrator wears crocs

I am fixating on them so hard like it's unreal

[surrtasm]

Btw, to my followers,

If you contributed in any way to the harassment and behavior that led up to the Homicipher creator quitting, i want you to get tf off my blog.

It proves that you have zero intellectual capacity and dont think whatsoever. It doesn't matter if you lack empathy or anything you should know that it's a person behind any account and you should treat people with basic respect.

So if you were one of those losers, fuck you🖕🏼🖕🏼way to ruin another good thing for those who enjoy it.

[stubz]

'Tired. Hungry. Wannagohome. Wannasleepbutneedtodochores. Howmuchtimeisleft?WhatifIpulledthefirealarmtogohomeearly?Capwouldn'tbethatmad-' the human's mind whirled as hunger and exhaustion took over all her senses. Being tired was something Kim was used to but hunger is always hard to ignore. Why did she choose sleeping in over packing a lunch???

Although tired and borderline ravenous with hunger the human diligently watched the younglings as they played in the park. Every part of her still functioning brain was doing it's best to focus on the children's movements and surroundings.

Look out for suspicious individuals, look out for any child doing something stupid, head count, look out for any parents coming to pick up, repeat.

'Maxcomedistractme. Kidsdistractme. NononoI'llsnapatthemfromhanger. Hangertoodangerousrightnow. Sohungrysohungrysofu-'

"Miss Kim look at my pet!" smiled Athea bringing over what looked like a giant wolf boar thing. Some of the other little ones came with her and Kim could see Fenrir walking over with a warm smile.

"They're so big and fluffy! What's their name?" Kim smiled doing her best to keep down the hanger.

While the little orc talked all about her pet the human couldn't help but have her mind drift off. Nods and hums of approval was all the human could say without fear of giving into the hanger. The wolf boar thing's fur was all that kept the human grounded, petting it like it held the secrets to the universe in its fur...god she was hungry.

"-here's a treat miss Kim!" a large cracker like object is placed into the human's hand. A treat. Food.

She eats it in one bite without even looking at it.

It's salty, meaty, crunchy, a little stale, but not bad. Texture is strange though for a cracker or maybe its a biscuit, either way the hanger is now manageable enough for her to talk.

"Mm, what is this? Biscuit-gmph?!" Fenrir grabs her by the face and shoves his hand into her mouth.

"SPIT IT OUT! SPIT IT OUT KIM!!!" the orc yells sweeping through her mouth like a full of rage dentist.

"SHE ALREADY ATE IT UNCLE!" screams Athea already behind the human ready to do the Heimlich.

"Oh my god-WHAT DID SHE EAT THIS TIME?!" shouts Max drawn in by the commotion.

'what the f#ck did I eat???' is all that goes through the poor human's head.

.

After nearly making her throw up via the spine crushing heimlich Athea performed, some more rummaging through her mouth and gums, and some human/orc diet comparisons Kim was finally declared in the clear by a nurse who was going for a walk in the park.

Said human was now hunched over holding her stomach from her new bruises. And sipping a juice box so generously given to her by one of the younglings who wanted to cheer her up after the whole ordeal.

"I am so sorry love I should have asked you if humans could eat boglin liver...or the equivalent of it like your pig." the orc apologized rubbing her back soothingly.

"Not your fault Fen, it's this idiot's fault for not asking what she's eating." frowned Max. "Seriously, how did you not even bother to look at it? If you did then you'd see that it looks like a dog treat and that would've stopped you." he scolds handing her a granola bar.

"I've been classically conditioned!"

"...what?? By who??"

"My dad! So blame him!"

"...what is classically conditioned and why did your father do it to you love?"

"Basically you train a person or animal to do something. You say a word or make a noise as they do something then give them a reward, usually food, and eventually after a long enough time each time they hear the thing they'll just do the action. Like teaching a pet commands."

"...your father treated you like a pet?!" roars the enraged orc.

"Nonono! My dad loves me! He just called everything I liked a treat! Chocolate milk, treat, pineapple, treat, favorite dinner, treat!"

"...oh so when Athea said 'here's a treat' you thought it was food you would like?" Max asked.

"Exactly! See? My dad loves me, like a person!" Kim assured her very angry giant orc.

"...I understand...but please have less blind trust in the word 'treat' as not everything is safe for humans to eat." he sighs giving her a hug.

"Honestly she'd probably be fine no matter what. She's a raccoon."

"I...cannot argue against that."

"I do not know what that is but I will assume that it is a creature that eats hazardous things and garbage. Much like you my little love."

"Again I cannot argue against that."

[xxplastic-cubexx]

it doesnt need to be said but its genuinely so funny how at-the-hip charles and erik are in krakoa like they really had the green light- the OBLIGATION- to be as obnoxiously close to each other as possible and abused that right to the fullest extent

[cheese-water]

Fuck it I’m speaking my truth. Boobers y’all gotta stop being unnecessarily mean to ConnorEatsPants. I’ve been going through his sf6 vods and every time he references being ostracized and harassed by twitter users, my heart breaks. Connor even said that he no longer mentions being friends with Ranboo and other creators because he doesn’t want boobers to start hating Ranboo for it.

And he’s right btw. Remember when there was a possibility Connor might be in genloss? Instead of being excited or just saying nothing, boobers began linking threads on why he’s such a horrible person and how his inclusion would ruin the project as a whole. We don’t even know if he was joking or not, yet you all still celebrated when he didn’t appear in episode 2. I’m pretty sure Connor will never publicly interact with Ranboo or this community again after the way you all treated him. That’s really fucked guys.

While I understand the want to “hold people accountable” for their past actions, 1) it’s not your responsibility to hold people accountable over the internet and 2) judging everyone on their past mistakes alone is a very dehumanizing and hypocritical way to view other people.

Why is this community all about treating other with respect and kindness, especially when they’re on the spectrum, but Connor is the exception?

[tigergirltail]

me: "Yeah I see why the HDG universe hits for a lot of people but tbh I'm just not feeling it. No disrespect at all, it's just not for me personally."

writer brain: "But what if we learn enough about the universe to write a fic from an Affini's point of view?"

me: "..............Fuck."