#however if the ending whether it's tragic or not gives me a 'that's all?!' feeling on different aspects then i'll be angry

[ellecdc]

Hey Elle my love!! Could I please request chef!sirius who discovers that his girl (while a beast behind the bar) is actually tragic in the kitchen? Like whether the food turns out good is up to you, but she’s just constantly burning her fingers, cutting herself, making giant messes, and I feel like he’d be both frightened and a bit smug about his own prowess haha. Feel free to take whatever from this you like, and no pressure of course <3

something you want to share with the class, mae?

chef!Sirius Black x mixologist!reader who is banned from the kitchen [1.1k words]

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7

CW: one suggestive part, Sirius coddling reader, reader needs to be coddled, fluff

Sirius lets himself into your flat, which still makes his stomach flip pleasantly when he thinks about it. 

It was innocuous enough when it started; he would come by and knock at your door and you’d shout “it’s open!” and he would walk in and accost you with kisses before saying “you need to stop leaving your door unlocked, doll” to which you’d reply “but I like having you just walk in like you own the place”. 

And, well, Sirius liked the words coming from your mouth so much that he set the situation aside in favour of ravishing you. But by the time the two of you were sweaty and breathless and laying naked tangled in your sheets, it had been you who brought it up again. 

“Would this make you feel better?” You whispered as you slid a hand up his chest, and he could feel something cold between the warmth of your hand and his chest. He took your wrist gently between his fingers and lifted your hand to expose a key as well as a plastic fob.

“Wha-”

“It’s my keys. Well, not my keys, but...keys…to here, to my flat.” 

“You…you’re giving me keys to your flat?” He asked breathlessly, and you tried to burrow further into the bed and hide your face in his shoulder.

“I- sorry, sorry. I don’t know if it’s too soon, but I just- you know what, I’m sorry, forget I-”

But he pulled you back up and positioned your knees on either side of his hips so you were straddling him, forcing you to look at him. 

“You have no idea how lovely you are, do you?” He whispered with no shortage of awe, and the two of you fell into each other again.

Long story short, he took your keys and probably (absolutely) abused the power that came with having them, but you hadn’t said anything about it yet so he wouldn’t either.

So, Sirius let himself into your flat; his senses assaulted from the beautiful spices of what smelled like butternut squash soup, the sound of your music playing from the speaker in your kitchen, and the beautiful sight of you in an oversized t-shirt - scratch that, one of Sirius’ t-shirts - and not much else as you flit through the kitchen like a fusion between a ballroom and an Irish dancer; quick and graceful on your feet.

Absolutely nothing else about the kitchen looked graceful, however. 

“What are you making, doll?” He called over as he leaned his elbows on the only clean portion of your kitchen island; you’d been so immersed in your current task that you actually startled at his voice.

A smile quickly spread over your face as you shouted at alexa to turn the volume down. “Hi, baby.” You greeted eagerly - breathless from what seemed to simply be excitement at seeing him here - as you made your way around the island to him.

“Hi, doll.” He whispered as he perched himself on one of the stools and accepted you between his legs; your arms moving to tangle in some of the hair at the base of his neck as you breathed him in.

“Hi, baby.” You repeated.

“What are you making?” He asked again, nudging your nose with his.

“Soup!” You said eagerly, pressing another kiss to his lips, one more, and a peck to his nose before dislodging yourself from him and rushing back to the stove top. 

“All this for some soup, huh?” He offered as casually as he could manage whilst he surveyed your kitchen; vegetable ends, splashes of cream, spilled salt and spices, used measuring cups and more than a few dirtied paper towels littering every inch of your counter space.

But what caused him the most concern and confusion was the splatters and chunks of puree up the walls, cupboards, and - most disturbingly - in your hair.

“Gorgeous, did you get in a fight with the squash or something?” He teased as he moved towards you, almost slipping on a splatter that was next to your bare feet. “Y/N.”

“I…may have forgotten to put the lid on the blender when I started it.” You offered reluctantly. 

“May have forgotten? Sweetheart, there’s more soup on your walls than in your bowl; was it still hot?” 

You made a noncommittal sound and refused to look at him which was all the answer he needed. 

“Okay, that’s it.” He decided as he took the utensils out of your hands - locking both of your wrists in one of his hands when you went to grab them back - turned the stove off and ushered you to his now vacated stool. 

“I’m fine, Sirius.” You whined, though you allowed him to lift you up onto the stool.

“It’s in your hair.” He responded as he worked his fingers through the offending lock. “Where else did it land?” He asked as he surveyed your face.

You simply batted your eyes at him with a pout on your pretty lips.

“Y/N.”

“Sirius.”

“Where else did it land?” He repeated, crouched down so he was level with you and giving you a look that he really, really hoped conveyed no nonsense. 

Your lips pursed as you lifted your arm to expose the soft, sensitive underneath of your forearm that was hastily wrapped with paper towel and something sticky. 

“Baby.” He cooed almost embarrassingly as he lifted your arms for a better view. It appeared you had hurriedly smeared some burn cream on it before slapping paper towel over it in favour of finishing your meal. 

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled pathetically, and Sirius wanted to shake you for that, too. 

“What’re you apologising to me for? You’re the one who was maimed.” He all but whimpered, turning away from you only to grab a cloth and run it under cold water.

“It tastes really good though.” You explained solemnly as he returned to between your legs as if you thought that made what had happened here at all better.

“Gorgeous, that soup could very well be served at a Michelin star restaurant and I’d still sodding hate it for doing this to my sweet girl.” 

You cocked your head at him and pursed your lips in an attempt to quell the no doubt beaming smile threatening to take over your face. 

“You have no idea how lovely you are, do you?” You murmured at him, and he couldn’t help but return your smile with a soft one of his own.

Sirius let out a sigh mixed with exasperation and fondness as he pressed kisses up the length of your forearm. “You’re banned from the kitchen.” He spoke into your skin.

“But-”

“Banned, baby girl. Capital B - banned.”

[linkspooky]

JASON TODD VS. DABI: WHY NOT ME?

"You haven't been here long but you've seen him, right? The batman. The batman. He lives in darkness, to find the helpless and bring them into the light. So I have to wonder...why couldn't he do it for me?" The Boy Wonder: Issue #2

This is the story of the boy who didn't get saved. The story of a boy who really ought to have been saved. Of course, every victim deserves to be saved, but this boy was the son of a superhero. Can a hero who saves everyone, but fails to save his own son really be called a hero? As for the son, how does it feel to watch his father save complete strangers but let him fall to the wayside?

Jason Todd and Dabi are two characters with similar backstories and motives (so similar it's possible Dabi is outright based on Jason Todd) which are worthy of comparison. These are two tragic arcs which explore the conflict between a hero's responsibility to act as a father, and their responsibility to save people. As I said they are tragic because in both cases the hero fails, as a father, and a hero. However, I'm comparing the two because Jason Todd's story is a well written tragedy, and Toya's story is not.

If you were to write a story of my life, it would surely be a tragedy.

Aristotle's Poetics is the first attempt to define what Tragedy is, not as a story where sad things happen but a specific story structure. He outlines not only what makes tragedy, tragedy, but also what makes a good tragedy.

The Plot, then, is the first principle, and, as it were, the soul of a tragedy: Character holds the second place. A similar fact is seen in painting. The most beautiful colours, laid on confusedly, will not give as much pleasure as the chalk outline of a portrait. Thus Tragedy is the imitation of an action, and of the agents mainly with a view to the action.

I use this quote because the painting metaphor is a great way of explaining what I'm getting at, you can have a painting with the most wonderful colors, you can have a story with really good ideas like the Todoroki family plotline but if you don't use those colors correctly all you're going to end up with is a bad painting.

In poetics Aristotle clearly defines a tight well-structured plot as the first priority for effective tragedy, character as second.

Again, a beautiful object, whether it be a living organism or any whole composed of parts, must not only have an orderly arrangement of parts, but must also be of a certain magnitude; for beauty depends on magnitude and order. Hence a very small animal organism cannot be beautiful; for the view of it is confused, the object being seen in an almost imperceptible moment of time. Nor, again, can one of vast size be beautiful; for as the eye cannot take it all in at once, the unity and sense of the whole is lost for the spectator; as for instance if there were one a thousand miles long

To make sure you understand, it's vital in tragedy for all the pieces to fit together. Tragedy is a specific story format. Good tragedy uses the parts of a story well, but bad tragedy is sloppy and poorly put together. In tragedy, the whole has to be greater than the sum of its parts. The Todoroki Family are all good characters out of context, but the story could have enhanced their characters but detracted from them due to how poorly it is told. The fact that a lot of MHA fans are in love with the Todoroki family out of the context of the story, but also have constant complaints for how Horikoshi handles their plotlines is, in my opinion, very telling.

What Aristotle goes on to posit is the best tragedies do not come about by accident, but rather by the direct actions of the characters.

But again, Tragedy is an imitation not only of a complete action, but of events inspiring fear or pity. Such an effect is best produced when the events come on us by surprise; and the effect is heightened when, at the same time, they follow as cause and effect. The tragic wonder will thee be greater than if they happened of themselves or by accident; for even coincidences are most striking when they have an air of design. 

Therefore Tragedies require consequentialism, like Newton's Third Law, every action will have an equal and opposite reaction. To simplify a good tragedy arises from the consequences of the character's actions (or inaction). The most basic form is that the hero of the story will have a tragic flaw that they fail to improve upon in time and then leads to their destruction. In essence, tragedy is where the hero fails. Not only does the hero fail, but the hero loses, and that irreversible loss is what defines tragedy. Medea slays her own children, Oedipus rips his own eyes off and deserts his kingdom, Creon Antigone is buried alive and Creon's son, her fiancee, commits suicide.

These events share two things in common, they are irreversible (hence why they feel like good endings), and two they evoke catharsis. Aristotle defines the goal of tragedy to evoke terror and pity. We feel alongside these heroes, Medea was abandoned by the husband Jason who she left her home and slaughtered her own brother for, Oedipus did all of his crimes unwittingly and is a victim of fate, Antigone was doing the right thing by burying her brother so his soul could pass on to the afterlife.

There's all different sorts of tragedies, Hamliet explores more here. I'd say UTRH and Hellish Todoroki Family are tragedies centered around grief.

Tragedy works on extreme emotions, and extreme hard-hitting consequences to the hero's failures. The worst thing a tragedy can be is boring.

The Tragic Hero

Now that I'm done lecturing you let's actually talk about both My Hero Academia and Batman like I promised. Both of these stories don't actually feature the central victim as their protagonist, and that is a feature not a flaw.

Rather, the story we are being told is that of a tragic hero, failing to save a tragic victim because of their own personal flaws.

These flaws are called (hamartia) or "error in judgement". A hero, being called a hero of a story is often unaware of his flaws which is central to what makes them unable to fix those flaws in time. That flaw can later lead to a moral failing, such as Othello's jealousy, initially jealousy is an understandable emotion, but then it leads to him trusting Iago over his own wife and killing his wife in a rage.

Most importantly, the hero’s suffering and its far-reaching reverberations are far out of proportion to his flaw.

Let's begin with talking of the heroes and their flaws, Batman and Endeavor. My main reason for comparing these two is in these specific stories they have the same flaw, inability to move past their personal guilt towards their son, and the same conflict the duty of a father versus the duty of a hero.

However, Batman functions as a tragic hero, and Enji does not. The summary of their conflict is right here in these two panels.

A parent is required to place their children above everything else, because they are the ones responsible for bringing that child into the world. Bruce Wayne made the decision to adopt Jason. Enji made the decision to have children, however with Enji you have the added insidious motivation of he only wanted to make designer babies and just didn't care for the ones who didn't turn out right.

Bruce attempts to do both, to act as a father for Jason and also a crime fighter as batman but he can't do both. This comes to a head in Death of the Family when Jason is having serious trouble because of his lack of a strong parental figure, and Bruce knowing that Jason is in trouble chooses still to go off and fight crime instead of staying with him. The choice to place crimefighting over the child they chose to take responsibility for has the unintended consequence of getting that child killed.

Whereas Enji makes the same choice over and over again, ignoring Toya's clear troubles at the fact his father no longer spends time with him and choosing to run away to the world of heroes because he doesn't want to face the fact that his actions are severely hurting his son. Bruce's motivations are more sympathetic admittedly he wasn't actively practicing eugenics, but the choice is the same and the consequences are the same.

Both Bruce and Enji are forced to bear witness to the deaths of their children when they are not there, specifically because they made a choice to be a hero instead of staying by their child's side. A situation directly caused by their choice to be a hero over a father, and a situation that would have been avoided if they had stayed with their child in their time of need. Jason runs off when Batman tells him to stay and gets kidnapped by the Joker, if Enji had been on Sekoto peak that day Toya would never have accidentally lost control of his fire.

This is just the backstory however, the main event that kickstart this plot is the unexpected return from the dead of both Jason and Dabi. Each story follows the same plot beats. A new villain appears to challenge Endeavor / Batman. The villain reveals themselves as their dead son. Both Endeavor / Batman are given a chance to try reaching out to their sons, but they choose not to.

Then even though they are given a second chance with a miracle of a dead son coming back to them, they choose the exact same thing they chose before, being a hero and because of that the tragedy repeats itself. For both of them they are unable to save their son again, and the son goes through a second death. History repeats itself, the lesson isn't learned.

Their fatal flaw is their guilt. This is a story about grief and mourning after all, a son who is died, buried, but never grieved properly, never mourned, an open wound on the father suddenly coming back. The inability of each to process their grief blinds them from seeing the fact the son has come back, and they have a second chance.

Toya has internalized he is a failure, because Enji literally called him that. Jason believes that Batman thinks he is a failure. In both cases the father is the one who failed, Bruce at least acknowledges this but cannot communicate it in any way shape or form.

This guilt and responsibility both Enji and Bruce feel causes them to self-sabotage. They no longer have the confidence they are in the right (they no longer feel like heroes because they have failed to be heroes to their own son).

You can also add the layer of complication that since both men chose to be heroes in the past, they do not know how to handle the situation as a father now that they're being challenged to step up as one. Unfortunately, they are not the fathers that stepped up.

The reason their grief becomes a flaw is because they put their grief over their victims. . Each man is aware too much of their own failure, and while they should feel guilty they make the classic mistake of placing their own guilt over the feelings of the victim. The guilt they feel for causing the death and the genuine grief of losing a son is given priority over Jason and Dabi who you know... actually died.

An overwhelming grief and guilt is understandable because grief is a messy and human emotion, losing a child is an unimaginable tragedy that should never be inflicted on anyone.

Yet at the same time both Dabi and Jason are grieving to. This paradox that Batman only thinks of his own grief at losing a son and never stops to think about how Jason must feel leads to one of the best lines in Under the Red Hood.

"The father had lost a son, and now the son had lost a father."

Batman's guilt is so strong over being the cause of Jason's suffering, that the suffering of the victim himself is ignored. To be fair to My Hero Academia, the Todorokis say a similar line to Enji.

However, this is where I begin to get into the difference between ideas and execution. Tragedies are stories of actions and logical consequences, every action has an equal and opposite reaction in Under the Red Hood. Batman is punished for the choices he makes, the choices he doesn't make, and the choices he fails to make in time.

The Todoroki plotline features almost none of its character making any choices of substance, and because of that the plotline says the right things over and over again, but it all comes off as tell don't show.

I'm going to quote @codenamesazanka's post right here a couple of times because they describe the complete failure of the Todoroki plotline to show us a reason why we should be feeling things for the characters artfully.

We've heard Enji say this before - I'm sorry, I intend to atone. It's indeed the right thing to say, it's exactly what he should be saying and acting. Natsuo is declaring no contact - That's fine, I'm sorry, I accept this as part of my atonement and will continue. Touya calls him a coward - That's fine, I'm sorry, I accept this as part of my atonement and will continue. The public hates him - That's fine, I'm sorry, I accept this as part of my atonement and will continue. But you can only hear this so many times before you want to snap and beat the character, the story, the writing over the head with Enji's wheelchair. Why is that? He's behaving exactly as he should, and yet...

The reason why it fails to evoke strong feelings is because of what we'd called "narrative dissonance." The actions of Bruce and Enji are the same, they both neglect to do anything, make any real attempts to reach out to their victims because they're paralyzed by guilt.

However, we are told that they have entirely different arcs. Bruce's arc is a tragic fall. He's failing as a hero. While we are being told that Enji is experiencing an arc of atonement. Enji is supposed to be improving himself, and Bruce is supposed to be experiencing negative character development but they both do the exact same thing in story. Bruce neglects Jason, we are told by the story, by the characters in the story that Bruce is failing Jason. Enji does nothing in time to actually atone for Toya or try to help him, yet, we are told again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again that Enji is atoning with nothing substantive to show us this is the case.

To show what I meant instead of telling this scene is in chapter 252.

This scene is the ending point in chapter in chapter #426.

It's just him repeating the exact same sentiment and yet in a more than 150+ chapter gap, Enji never made any action to show he was now placing his family first. Enji didn't say anything to Dabi when he revealed himself as Toya. Enji didn't look for Toya in the months before the final war arc. Enji literally appeared on live TV in a broadcast that Toya was watching and said the very selfish "Watch Me" atone for the crime of creating Toya instead of literally talking about Toya or too Toya. Well, that would have rocked the boat too much... THAT IS LITERALLY THE POINT. Enji had to somehow break from tradition or make some significant sacrifice onscreen to his social standing to show that he's willing to put his family first. Enji decides to go along with Hawks decision to not face Toya head on, making the decision to be the hero for the final time which directly causes Toya to get up after Shoto brings him down non-lethally and make one last attempt to suicide bomb for his father's inaction.

Bruce does nothing for a long time in Under the Red Hood. He ignores his initial instinct that Jason came back and instead makes a long investigation on whether or not someone can come back from the dead in order to distract himself. When Jason takes the mask off, Batman already knew but was pretending otherwise because he didn't want to face the reality.

Even when Jason takes his mask off, Bruce still takes on the "I need to investigate this" angle even though Jason calls him out that deep down he already knows it's the truth. This of course foreshadows Bruce's underlying flaw, he doesn't want to face Jason head on because he feels too much grief about what happened to Jason and his guilt is more important than Jason's own grief. Just as the father has lost the son, the son has lost the father.

What follows is several chapters of Batman fighting crime as usual and making no attempts to directly search for Jason. They cross paths a few times but when they do Bruce doesn't follow. In fact, Bruce only shows up when Jason sends Bruce a sample of the joker's hair and Bruce knows that the Joker has kidnapped him out of Arkham. Bruce almost lets Jason get killed by Black Mask because he doesn't know whether to stop Jason or save him yet again, and then they have their final showdown where Jason has kidnapped the joker to demand Bruce kill him, and Bruce finally attempts to talk him down.

Out of context it sounds like I'm describing the same plotline, to the point where if you haven't read either, it looks like I'm complaining baselessly. Why is one hero doing nothing until it's too late good, and the other bad? The difference is of course context, or rather framing. Bruce's actions are called out by the people around him (Dick, Jason, Alfred) as him handling the situation wrong. Whereas both Enji's internal monologue and other characters say that he is doing his best to atone for his actions and deserves a chance, but the events we are shown in story are the exact opposite.

Here's another example to SHOW my point. Here's Dabi with my special, hardcover edition of under the Red Hood.

I reread the entirety of the fourteen chapter plotline and the majority of internal narrations come from characters outside of Bruce observing his behavior and commenting on how differently he's acting. Jason's backstory for instance is told by Alfred, not Bruce. Dick Grayson the first Robin comments on Batman's odd behavior. The rest are the third person narrator. Bruce has four instances of internal monologues spanning a few pages each in a 378 page story. (Alfred has the most internal monologues and he's presented as a more trustworthy unbiased narrator than Bruce, to get us to question Bruce's actions).

"Information travels on many routes, sometimes it comes predictably like the tides. You just need to know where to stand and meet it. Other times it's elusive and you have to root through the garbage to find it. In the last few years I've come to rely on Barbara Gordon, Oracle, we all did. Utilizing every form of surveillance equipment she has been the eyes and ear [...] but those days are over. I can't rely on anyone anymore. [...] and tonight it's also about the company I keep. It's different with him [night wing] out here. I think about when he was younger, when I was younger, it was different, simpler and I miss it. I miss those days, for that it's hard to be around him.

This first internal monologue is a case of unreliable narrator, because as soon as finishing it Dick Grayson / Nightwing shows up, offers Batman his help and while Bruce at first refuses it the two of them are forced to work together to fight Amazo. What does this show us? Bruce is not alone, but Bruce actively acts like he's alone ignoring the feelings of the other people around him. It exhibits a flaw of Bruce and the bad headspace he is in mentally (if I remember correctly Stephanie Brown recently died in the comics while this storyline was being published. It establishes Bruce's improper coping mechanism with grief, and how he is going about it the incorrect way.

Bruce says I work alone, and then Bruce says it's easier working with Dick, I miss it, but I can't go back to those days. It's bruce's contradictory thinking patterns in the same chapter that stop him. it's bruce's fault he cannot connect to Dick, and he is actively mourning the past because his relationship with Dick has changed.

Now the final part of the monologue in that chapter.

He's quick. Not just fast, agile. He's not thinking about his next move, he's just making it. He's been trained well. And there's something about him. Something familiar. There was something interesting about before he cut the line, before it had been taught. That had to have been practiced. Either that or just plain dumb luck. No it's not luck.

This is the first hint that Bruce already suspects it's Jason from early on but is in denial about it. This unreliable narrator trope also gives an agency to Bruce's decision, he is actively choosing to ignore the possibility that it's Jason because it doesn't want it to be.

Whereas, a lot of Endeavor's plot takes away any agency from him. For example, he doesn't even know that Dabi is Toya, because if he had the sneaking suspicion and ignored it like Batman did that might have made him look bad. We can't have the main character in a tragedy looking bad now can we?

The second monologue is more denial.

That device is from Kord industries. I should know. Ordered it special from them. How can he have it? No more dead ends. No more questions. No more guessing. Tonight I find out what is passing for the truth.

Reading between the lines this is outright confirmation Batman already knows.

The third is a brief reflection in his feelings for Jason.

The armor has to be light enough to fit but strong enough to protect. But sometimes a great many times, it's not strong enough. It wans't strong enough for Barbara who has to fight from her chair. It wasn't strong enough for Stephanie, other dear soldier enough dear grave. And it wasn't enough for Jason. Willful Jason. Who ignored the danger. Who spat at risk. Who was never frightened enough. I've always wondered... always... was he scared at the end? Was he praying I'd come save him? And in those last moments when he knew that I wouldn't. Did he hate me for it?

This monologue directly shows without stating it outright, Bruce is prioritizing his feelings of grief and failure mixing them in with his genuine grief over the loss of a son. it's selfish of him, but grief is a selfish emotion.

Here's the thing Bruce is allowed to be selfish and to not have the correct reaction to his grief, because the whole story is centered on Bruce being unable to get his shit together in time, and this picture into his emotions is an explanation as to why. Bruce is afraid of being hated by Jason. Jason of course has every right to hate him for failing as a father, but still I think not wanting to be hated to a person you loved so much and feel genuinely sorry over what you let happen to them is an understandable reaction.

Meanwhile we have Enji saying repeatedly all the right things in his monologue, the selfless, I don't need to be forgiven, it's okay if they hate me, I just need to atone but he never actually does anything. There's no explanation for why he isn't doing anything either, so that narrative dissonance. We're shown why Bruce doesn't act in time, he's internally a mess to be frank. We are not shown why Enji doesn't act in time because his internal monologue tells us again and again he's committed to atoning and he understands what the right thing to do is.

As Codenamesanzanka says:

Enji is still saying all the right things, but the story isn't giving him the opportunity to actually do the right things. To have his new actions matter. I have no doubt about his sincerity in his mantra, but without the 'show', it's hollow. Similarly, "Let's talk" is actually kinda bullshit too, because it's so vague. This is less about Enji, and more about the writing, how it set up this scene. "Let's talk" or "I want to talk" or any of that variation is repeated 6 times, without anything more or specific added.

There's an excess of repetition of Enji saying he wants to atone, he's ready to atone, without any of that materializing in the story.

As @class1akids says in this reaction post:

It also feels also super-hollow to say he's sheltering the family from the fallout, after they've just talked about how Fuyumi lost her job (and got a new one through the connections she herself built). How is he going to do that?

The fourth because I don't want to write it down, it's just Batman monologueing on how his partnership with Jason is still good and explaining the technical details of his fight with count Vertigo. It's in chapter 10 if you must look it up.

So four monologues total. Two monologues establish indirectly that Batman knows that Red Hood is Jason and doesn't want to face him. The third monologue establishes why he doesn't want to face him, he's afraid of being hated. The monologue is in line with Bruce's actions in the story, Bruce investigates several ways of reviving from the dead instead of looking for Jason.

The character's reactions around Bruce are also talking about how he's not acting like himself. Especially Alfred's who speaks of Bruce's indecision, on whether to put a stop to or save Jason.

"It is curious. He is lost in thought. It is not like him to spend vast stretches of time immobile, where his mind is gripped in the solitary process of deduction. This is quite different. He is hesitating. At a loss for what to do. I believe it is about Jason. And whether or not to stop him or save him."

This is illustrated in two scenes later where Jason spends a long time simply watching when Jason is fighting enemies, first in a fight against Captain Nazi, and second Black Mask. Jason even gives a direct callout of that behavior.

Jason: What the hell took you so long? Couldn't decide if you wanted to let me live. Batman: Shut up and fight.

Observed by Alfred Bruce is completely stalling and can't choose, observed by Jason Bruce can't decide whether to let Jason live or not. Bruce hesitates twice. We know why. We see it in action. It's called out as flawed behavior.

Now let's cover all the tell that don't show that is Endeavor's many monologues.

Pro Hero Arc:

I have to safeguard the future for them. That's the job for whoever's on top. What about the lives I cut short? Just demanding forgiveness isn't enough, it's too late for that. At this point I need to atone there's no other route.

Hellish Todoroki Family 1:

I'm trying to make ammends going forward. It might be too late. but I fall asleep every night thinking about it. Lately it's been the same dream. The wife and the kids looking happy at the dinner table. But I'm never there with them. It might be too late but I fall asleep every night thinking about what I can do for my family. I wish you could be here too, Toya. It's always the same dream. My whole family's there but not me. If I really care how they feel [I'll remain here].

I'm not going to read 200 chapters so I'm just going to ballpark it based on memory. Here we go.

Dabi's Dance:

My eldest, Toya didn't harbor frost within him. He didn't have a way to overcome the inescapable downside of overheating but I nevertheless sought to raise the boy as a hero. [...] Because Toya had more potential than me I placed my ambitions on his shoulders. I thought it could be you. You could have been the one to reach my eternal goal. My frustration... My envy... The ugliness in my heart... you could have been the one to smash it all to dust.

Plot twist this is the only monologue I like. It's different from all the others, and it's the only one where Enji is being emotionally honest. He put the emotional burden of his own emotional insecurities on an eight year old child, and expected to live vicariously through him and when Toya failed to live up to those expectations he just abandoned him. It alligns what we have been shown so far, Enji is not acting like a reptentant man here who realizes the harm he's done to Toya and only thinks of Toya as an extension of himself and his own regrets.

The Fight Against AFO:

My mistakes took the form as Toya leading to many stolen futures. The past never dies. Rage, resentment and even penace wound together toward the future. And the future is a path for the young. A path with so many branching choices. That's why I must win this. [I'll keep paying my penance. I'll win today and keep my eyes on Toya.]

When Enji decides to double Suicide with Toya:

I take full responsibility. I swore to bear the burden and live my life atoning for it all. However, you've been watching me all this time. While I couldn't be there to watch you. You were someone I especially needed to do right by. No I can't let you meet your end alone, but I won't let anyone else get caught up in our tragedy.

Hellish Todoroki Family Final:

I came to talk about what's to come. I'm retiring as a hero. That was my initial plan even before the war started, but now I can't even walk on my own. The hero endeavor burned to death. Your flames were really stronger than mine. [...] You're right. You know everything about me, Toya. After all you were always watching me. And you wanted me to do the same for you, but I didn't. Not matter what anyone says your heat does come from my hellflame. From now on I'll come everyday, so let's talk. It's too late now, so let's talk. [...] You're free to hate me. Anything is fine really, so throw it all at me.

This one is spoken dialogue but it's still a four-page long monologue. Every one of Enji's monologues with one exceptionsays the same thing: I'm sorry, I'll spend the rest of my life atoning for my actions.

We're repeatedly told Enji is atoning but he acts like Batman. Then, his actions should be framed as Batman, not atoning but avoiding any responsibility.

As observed by Class1akids when we were discussing the update:

Everyone else faces an uphill struggle with their lives, but we should all feel sorry for Enji atoning and being in hell. I hate Hori's compulsion to over-write his abusers and over-explain their atonement. He does this with Bakugou too but with Enji it's more irritating. It was so much more enjoyable when he just wrote the thing but didn't point at them and say -> look, they are atoning. Aren't they soooo cool??

Enji's internal monologues and the other characters frame him as some sort of martyr, while on the other hand it's clear by both Batman's actions and Alfred's observations he's not acting like his usual self. In fact, this is an interpretation of Under the Red Hood that I love from the writers of the video game Arkham Knight that does a less tragic retelling of Under the Red Hood:

Batman doesn't fight victims. He saves them.

Therefore if Batman is fighting Jason, a victim, he's not acting like Batman. I'm also fine with Arkham Knight being an Under the Red Hood retelling because it's a different story. Comics do this all the time, different universe versions, popular storylines adapted into different mediums. It also works as a commentary on the original story, by showing what Batman could have done to lead to a more positive outcome it makes Batman's choices in Under the Red Hood worse and more tragic because he could have saved Jason, there was still a chance.

So here we have two flawed tragic heroes who are meant to be both pitied and condemned for their actions. One of them is all pity with no condemnation. The other is both pity and condemnation, Batman is grieving, but also he's failing his responsibility towards Jason. Therefore one protagonist works, the other fails utterly.

I'm not saying abusers don't deserve redemption. I'm not saying Enji should have died in order to atone. I'm not saying that the underlying problem with the arc is that they decided to make Enji sympathetic and a focus of the arc. The most important problem is the breaking of one of the fundamental rules of storytelling: Show, Don't Tell.

The Tragic Villain

Not only does The Hellish Todoroki Family plotline fail to make Enji a compelling protagonist, it also fails it's biggest victim. Now, these are both stories that end with the hero failing to save their victim. So if both of these stories have the same ending, why am I saying it failed Dabi, but not Jason?

Well, let me explain.

Dabi and Jason are both villains turned victims. The stories themselves are about this ambiguity. How much should the be held responsible for their own choices? If they are actively harming innocent people, then shouldn't they be stopped? Should they be automatically be forgiven just because of the pain and grief they've suffered, even if they've been causing it to others?

Both characters are also reflective of their fathers because they are too being selfish in their grief, they want their grief acknowledged and so are violently lashing out.

Jason and Dabi both make plays at being vigilantes at first, Dabi wants to inherit Stains will, and Jason Todd wants to be a better bat-man by taking control of the drug trade in Gotham and cutting crime down by executing gang heads. However, neither of them are being honest with this and it's shown through their actions, both of them abandon their original plans.

In the final showdown all Toya cares about is facing Enji on the battlefield, and when he's on the brink of death his mind erodes to the point where all he can do is scream for Enji's attention while his flames get hotter and hotter.

Let's take about Jason first and how his narrative treats him a whole lot better and more sympathetically, with more humanity than Batman. Jason is still held responsible for his choices, he is criticized by Bruce for murdering gang leaders and passing it off as justice. He's also blatantly shown to be a hypocrite. My favorite scene from Red Hood: Lost Days, the official UTRH prequel.

"I want to kill the joker in a cool way. Just sniping the Joker from a rooftop isn't dramatic enough for me."

This scene, and the final scene of UTRH underlines Jason isn't executing criminals because he believes it's the right thing to do, or because of his stated motivation that killing the joker would prevent more future victims.

Instead his every action is to set up a scenario where he makes a selfish demand of Bruce. He wants Bruce to prove to him that he would choose him over being a hero, by setting up his final scenario. Him, the Joker, and Batman. Jason will shoot the Joker. Bruce has a gun. He can either choose to let Jason kill the Joker, or kill Jason to stop him, either way it makes it clear what Bruce's priorities are.

The underlying reason for this is similiar to Bruce. Just like Bruce, Jason is deeply afraid that Batman doesn't love him. That he thinks of him as a failure. (This is Toya's main reason too).

He also interprets Bruce's failure to avenge him to mean that Bruce didn't even care enough to mourn him. If Bruce loved him enough, he'd choose him over the joker, but he's so afraid that Bruce doesn't love him enough that he's going to force Bruce to choose.

Along the way he's also going to behead several crimelords in order to put an exclamation point on that point.

The way Jason completely unravels in the confrontation shows this insecurity, he begins with monologueing about how batman should totally kill people, until his fear that he wasn't important enough, and his grief at losing his father is revealed.

Batman: I know I failed you, but I tried to save you. I'm trying to save you now. Jason: Is that what what you think this is about? Your letting me die. I don't know what clouds your judgement worse, your guilt or your antiquated sense of morality. Bruce, I forgive you for not saving me. Jason: But why on god's green earth is he still alive? Ignoring what he's done in the past. Blindly, stupidly disregarding the whole graveyards he's filled with people. The friend's he's killed. I thought killing me - that I'd be the last person you ever let him hurt. Jason: If it had been you that he beat to a bloody mess. If it had been you he left in agony. If he had taken you from this world. I would have done nothing but search the planet for this pathetic pile of evil, this death worshipping garbage, and sent him off to hell.

Direct statement, it's irresponsible of Bruce to let Joker live after killing Jason and should have put him down to prevent future victims. Reading between the lines, Batman not taking revenge for Jason is a sign that he didn't love him enough, Jason loves Batman more because he would have taken revenge.

As the confrontation continues and Jason's mental spiral worsens, to the point where he can't keep up his pretense of self-righteousness.

Jason: I'm not talking about killing cobblepot, or scarecrow, or riddled, or dent. Jason: I'm talking about him. Just him. And doing it because...he took me away from you.

The father had lost the son, and now the son had lost the father.

Jason's revenge is just a cover, for his grief at losing Bruce. I think this also shows a really positive aspect of Jason's character to humanize him instead of condemning him for his actions to ignore or even justify the suffering he endured: Jason really loves Bruce.

I mean how meaningful is the statement: "Bruce, I forgive you for not saving me."

Bruce has been afraid to hear the whole time that Jason hates him, that he won't forgive him, but Jason loves him deeply. In fact his love is almost equal to his rage because Jason is a deeply emotional person, and these little details make him human and not just like a plot obstacle that Bruce has to face. A metaphor for his past failures.

Dabi is drawn as a crying boy who wants comfort, Jason is shown to be a crying boy who wants comfort through both dialogue and action without us directly needing to be told. It's a heartbreaking line and doing it because he took me away from you and it lands perfectly because the narrative wants us to just look at Jason's grief. It doesn't add an asterisk* even though he was in pain, he's done unforgivable things that can't be justified to undercut Jason's suffering.

In fact that might be another underlying problem with The Hellish Todoroki Family, the narrative tries too hard to make you feel a certain way instead of just presenting things as they are to make you come to your own conclusion. UTRH doesn't support Jason's revenge based serial killing of villains. It doesn't say he's justified to cut off the heads of mobsters. However, it doesn't excessively state "Well, I'm really sorry what happened to you but what you've done can't be forgiven" so we don't have to challenge ourselves to feel too much empathy for Jason's suffering.

Meanwhile even when Toya tries to express his rightful anger and grief, we're always met with someone shutting him down and saying well yeah, but you're wrong, involving innocent people is unforgivable.

As said by @stillness-in-green in the replies to this post:

I think so much harm (in-universe, but the state of the Twitter fandom makes me think the messages are pretty toxic irl, too) comes out of portraying the Heroes as needing to weigh in on the *morality* of the Villains' actions before they gauge "saving" them, when that is not a thing that glorified cops have any business thinking they have the right to do. Demanding repentance before the rehab is so bizarre.

You can say someone's actions are wrong without using it as a factor to consider whether or not their suffering as a human being should be acknowledged, and like I said there's multiple instances of people just yelling at Toya how immoral he is instead of addressing the elephant in the room.

You're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong, you're wrong.

(Okay, I understand that some people have interpreted this as a show of Honnae and Tatamae, the Todoroki's who are a very repressed household are finally talking about their feelings even if those feelings are selfish and ugly).

(I'm not criticizing Shoto for saying that the people he killed were his own choice necessarily, Shoto is a character who's actions need to be read more deeply than his words he was dedicated to bringing Dabi down without him burning himself any further start to finished. My criticism lies in the fact that Hori uses Shoto as a mouth piece because he thinks we need to be reminded that murder is bad).

However, even acknowledging that time and place man, time and place. They couldn't have done that in the aftermath, when Toya isn't burning to death?

Hey buddy, you're being selfish.

Toya: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M MELTING, I'M MELTING.

This is I feel the underlying problem with the way the arc is written, not because the Todorokis are a very traditional Japanese family and there are cultural reasons they express their emotions differently, I'll give a caveat to that it's a nuance I might not understand.

However, I am arguing the actual problem is tell don't show. Horikoshi thinks that we as an audience need to be told multiple times that murder is bad, and we cannot be trusted to interpret that on our own.

Under the Red Hood shows both sides of Batman and Jason's debate, and let's us just come to the conclusion that Jason is in the wrong because revenge isn't justice. Horikoshi reaches no shit sherlock levels of telling us that we're not supposed to approve of Dabi's murders.

it's also a matter of giving Dabi narrative space to express his feelings, like every time Dabi tries to talk he is continually shut down (Shoto does engage Dabi talk to him and listen to why he didn't come back though I'll give him that) and it seems to be to push forward this weird idea that you shouldn't sympathize with the pain Dabi has endured or the ways he's dehumanized unless he does something to prove he deserves to be treated like a human being first.

Jason gets to monologue and make an entire argument, and his argument also shows the depths of his love for Bruce and what a deeply feeling person he is, and how those feelings being hurt and twisted could logically lead to his lashing out.

Compare this to Dabi who doesn't get a final monologue, but is instead reduced to a completely mindless state where he just cries out for his dad's attention. He doesn't get to make his argument.

Jason and Dabi both choose to blow themselves up, but Jason gets enough character agency to show this is a deliberate choice he's making even if it's the wrong one. He retains his character agency and ability to make decisions until the end of the narrative.

Jason's also you know physically crying. The end result of the narrative is about wrong choices that both Bruce and Jason make together, and then suffer the consequences together. Bruce watches the same failure play out again and he isn't able to save Jason, Jason doesn't get what he wants, he doesn't get revenge and he doesn't get to reunite with his father. It's tragic for both of them, and brought about by decisions both of them made.

Whereas yes Dabi makes a lot of bad decisions leading up to the last war arc, but in the end his final fate is up to a choice Enji made to not face Toya in the final battle.

However, while the final consequence of the battle is brought about more by Enji's decisions than Toya's, it's Toya who endures all the suffering and punishment. It's Toya who is in an iron coffin, and doomed to slowly and agonizingly die with all of his skin burnt off unable to move. Toya doesn't even get agency after the arc is over. Enji still has a wheelchair, Enji can still move around, Enji's still fucking rich, he's not in prison for his actions, he as Rei wheeling him around.

Toya's agency and choices are all taken from him, presumably to serve the plot purpose of making Enji save him to finish off his arc, and then ENJI DOESN'T EVEN SAVE HIM.

Also I think it's important to mention, Bruce's tragic ending is brought about by him attempting to save both, trying to save the joker and Jason with the same action. Whereas Enji's tragic ending is brought about by Enji NOT LIFTING A FUCKING FINGER TO HELP. Yet, it's Dabi who has the lion's share of suffering, and is sentenced to this horrific state of being skinless in an iron coffin and only being able to be awake a few minutes a day with no choice but to waste away.

Bruce is also immediately called out for his actions, by the Joker of all people, you handled this all wrong, it's your fault. Bruce is right to not kill the joker, killing the Joker would not have solved any of Jason's problems, but the fact that he put off facing Jason for so long, and his inability to communicate that he loves Jason is what leads to Jason thinking that the only way to prove Bruce loves him is to force him to choose. It's because Bruce has utterly failed to show him in any other way that he is loved.

Joker: Oh my god, I love it! You manage to find a way to win, and everyone still loses. I'm going to be the one who gets what he wants tonight, badda bing, badda boom."

I'd also like to add that a lot of agency in Enji's actions are taken away too, to make him look more blameless. It's not Enji's fault that he didn't say anything to Dabi during Dabi's dance, he passed out because he had a punctured lung. It's not Enji's fault that he spent a month protecting Deku instead of searching for Toya, he had to protect innocent people. It's not Enji's fault that he didn't go immediately to face Toya in the final war arc Hawks told him not to.

It's not Enji's fault that he made Shoto and Toya fight like Pokemon instead of cleaning up his own mess, and also he feels really sorry for it and as soon as he's done punching the bad guy he'll look after Toya he promises.

Enji does get called out for this behavior but it falls flat because it only comes from the villain AFO, and Toya himself. As I stated above too, the ending is more influenced by Enji's actions not Toya's (because Toya's agency is stripped away until he's mindless) but Toya is the one who has to die while Enji gets to live and atone.

That is the real sticking point for The Hellish Todoroki Family, the way it ends.

Themes Are For Eight Graders

The underlying problem with the whole arc and why The Hellish Todoroki Family fails as a tragedy, is because it wasn't written to be a tragedy.

The above quote is from an interview with the writers of the widely hated Game of Thrones Season 8, which took a sudden tragic turn for Dany's character, gave her an incredibly dehumanizing ending of being put down like a rabid dog by her own lover, an ending that was neither foreshadowed nor did it match with anything written before.

In this meta here by @hamliet it goes far more into depth that Game of Thrones isn't a tragedy, but a piece of Romantic fiction (not a love story, Romanticism is a genre of big emotions, the beauty of life, larger than life ideas hence why it fits well with fantasy genre, it can be sad but it doesn't follow tragic structure).

Dany is a romantic heroine, a deconstruction of the idea of the classic warrior princess trope, and you know a colonizer, but she's not meant to be written as an inherently bad person. There are people who say that Dany was going to die in the original books. I'm one of those people. Me. However, context and framing matters, Dany for all her colonizing ways does genuinely want to do the right thing, so it's likely she'd die a heroic death as a reflection of her selfless intentions (and intentions do matter for fictional characters) whereas in the show she's put down as a villain.

Now watch me I'm going to coin a term for future literary critics to use: Narrative Gaslighting.

Narrative gaslighting is different then Show Don't Tell, where an author has just failed to properly show what they're trying to tell you in the story. Narrative Gaslighting is when a narrative deliberately tries to mislead you, straight up lies to you, or just insists things that did not happen totally happened guys. Much like real gaslighting, Narrative Gaslighting makes you feel stupid for interpreting things a certain way and insists you were wrong all along.

Narrative gaslighting is when Tyrian gives a speech that everyone should have suspected Dany when she burned slavers alive that she was secretly evil and would one day turn on them.

Like, no.

Dany is flawed because she is a foreigner, interfering with the politics of a different country that she does not understand in order to gain enough resources and men to return to her home country and invade that country to exercise her right as a Targeryn to uphold the divine right of kings.

Game of Thrones doesn't mention any of that shit that's in alignment with the previous actions in the story, it's just insisting the very ableist notion that Dany was insane all along and her violence towards other people is the result of her mental illness.

(Also before anyone says, so if she's a colonizer than how can she have good intentions, everyone is Bad in Game of Thrones, they're all waging war to vie for a throne, monarchy is bad guys. IDK how to tell you that Game of Thrones has gray on gray on gray on gray morality).

(Also this aside ties into the hangup of MHA and most popular fandom culture on Twitter, that Dany's moral failings somehow disqualify her from her humanity. In spite of the fact that on top of all of that she's a rape victim, and like, Dany's only on that continent in the first place because she was sold as a bride.)

But here's the same weird subtext that Horikoshi's writing of Dabi. The fact that Dabi was continually victimized and denied human dignity does not need to be addressed, because he did the bad things and didn't atone properly enough for it first.

In essence this random post on the gunnerkrigg court forums I found on the same day the chapter came out, displaying apollo's gift of prophecy.

"When someone is persecuted, it's important to inform everyone about their flaws. That way you don't have to feel anything about all the times that they were denied human dignity."

So, Dany is not written as a tragic hero but a romantic one, we as an audience are both meant to acknowledge her flaws and sympathize with her, not demonize her in an ableist way for being insane, and even if Dany is meant to die the tragic way she dies does not match up with all of the narrative foreshadowing that was built before that.

Like, for instance a lot of POC after the show ended kept telling everyone that Dany's actions in a foreign country were seriously problematic, and not only did the audience not listen but the showwiters didn't acknowledge it with the same subtlety as the books. So those people especially were able to pick up Dany's character flaws, and when the show finally acknowledged them it's not even in the way that critiques of the show were pointing out Dany's flaws it was just "she was insane all along." Not like taking time to go "no matter what the intention, interfering with the politics of a foreign country is wrong."

The problem with the Todoroki arc is essentially the same, down to the ableism (because outsiders continually call Dabi either a maniac or insane Demon without even giving credence to his grievances about hero society he's just reduced to an insane fringe element of society, and Dabi himself is reduced to a completely mindless, childish, insane screaming state where he can't make active decisions).

The Todoroki Arc is not set up to us as a tragic one. The ending is pretty clearly telegraphed to the whole audience. People are not wrong for thinking that Toya's ending would be either rehabilitation like Rei with the eventual hope of being welcomed home, or some kind of house arrest where he still gets to be with his family.

Everyone happy at the Dinner table and Enji not sitting with them.

"I wish you could be here, Toya."

"We all have to go stop, Toya."

"In that case, I'll make him sit down for a bowl with me."

Even Shoto's efforts to take down Toya non-lethally are rendered completely pointless, because Toya gets back up again and then burns himself alive (completely by his own choice so no one has to feel bad that they failed).

The story sets up the expectation that Toya is going to be brought home and sit down for a meal with his family. Then it makes you feel stupid for going in an entirely different direction. It was always going to end this way didn't you know The Todorokis are a tragedy?

Well, I just spent a very long section of this thesis statement illustrating that if it's supposed to be a tragedy, then it's still not written well.

It's a written as a romantic story of a family healing, and the villain getting saved, only for the villain not to be saved and the story to just keep on going like not getting saved isn't a huge failure. This is something that should permanently destroy the main characters, that they got the chance to repeat Sekoto peak and be there this time and they all utterly failed. I feel bad for Shoto most of all because he did everything right, and he still loses his brother, but does the story show that?

The problem is the story is blatantly lying to you about the fact that Toya was somehow saved, even though he LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE HELLRAISER. To quote Codenamesanzanka again:

But I feel the story couldn't give us that because it will remind the reader and everyone just how much Touya will be missing. In-story, talking any more will overburden Touya's heart - and how apt is that metaphor? So let's talk about how we'll talk, but that's all that's allowed here for this scene. Else we'll see how unfair it is that Touya has to be confined to this room, he isn't with his family and they have to come to this prison just to tell him about their day, and soon he will be gone. Details make it real, and it would've exposed the lie that Touya was saved in an actual way. The story knows it too - "this extra time Shouto gave us." This is all 'extra', and not the core. [...] If the story was sincere that this is a case of "it's simply too late" - as it should be!!! imo, to really drive in the clear point that they failed, they did not get the save they wanted, because that's the truth - the tone of the chapter isn't tragic enough for that. The tone is going for 'Making Peace With This'. We've skipped the stages of grief and all we have is acceptance. The characters have accepted this, and so must the readers as well.

Therefore it's narrative gaslighting, the story is making us doubt our perceptions and trying instead to manipulate us to feel a certain way. We don't have to question the unfairness of Toya's fate, because look at all the people he's hurt, and look how Enji is atoning and taking responsibility.

The story builds up the idea that Enji will choose Toya. That he will choose being a father over being a hero. Enji doesn't do that, and it's Toya who suffers the horrific, painful consequences while Enji gets off mostly scott free. Mind you it's also ableist to suggest that being in a wheelchair is some sort of life-ending consequence like he's fine. The story even goes out of its way to say how avoidable this ending could have been if Enji or Rei or someone lifted a single finger to give Toya the acknowledgement he wanted, and then gives it a "Too little, Too Late" conclusion but doesn't acknowledge that this is where it's ending and instead tells us that Enji has successfully atoned.

"Everyone's watching me. So this is what it's like. If it was such a simple thing, then why not sooner?"

If it was going to turn out this way Toya should have just died here, not because death would somehow be a mercy compared to life in prison, but because the Todoroki Family doesn't deserve to get to pat themselves on the back. If they let Sekoto Peak happen a second time, then they should have to deal with the consequences of that.

It would be consistent is my point. This is written as a "Too Little, Too Late" kind of ending, but we don't get the emotional response from the Todorokis that they've let Toya die a second time.

On the other hand, UTRH has the exact same tragic ending but it doesn't make me angry because it's honest about it. The Todorokis let Sekoto peak happen a second time. Batman let Death in the Family happen a second time, but look at how even the narration and comic panels of the story acknowledge it.

"Fate is a funny thing. It swells up like a raging current and we are forced to travel. It provides us no exit. No deviation. It drops us in a bottomless ocean and compels us. We either swim, or drown, and sometimes as we struggle against the tide, a great truth arises."

One ends with Enji meaninglessly stating that he'll spend the rest of his life atoning for Toya and watching over him (which I guess will be like two months tops) for the fifth time. The other ends with Batman being lectured by the Joker of all people of how he chose wrong and being forced to watch once again as a warehouse blows up, and he's completely helpless to save Jason.

UTRH ends with the message that Batman sucks, Enji's atonement arc ends with Natsuo calling him cool for atoning and UTRH makes me like Batman way more as a character. Whereas at this point I feel nothing from the Todoroki Family, except for a disgust for the way that Toya not only has to die, but has to die a slow, gruesome death while the rest of his family walks away with the small comfort of "oh at least we'll get to say what we need to say before Toya passes."

Especially with the fact that Toya's greatest fear was that when he died, he died meaninglessly because his family never grieved him and all moved on with their life. I guess we don't have to analyze how gross the underlying message that criminals don't deserve to be sympathized with because themes are for eighth graders.

EPILOGUE

The post is finished but apparently everyone expects me to cover every single possible angle even in posts this long.

You didn't address the cultural aspect. Under the Red Hood is a western story, and Todoroki Family is based on eastern concepts.

The post isn't about that. The post is long enough I can't cover every single topic. Here's someone who covered that topic thoroughly. This one discusses more about the nuances of collectivism.

Also, since the Todoroki Family obviously copied Under the Red Hood's homework, it warrants a comparison. Especially since it seems to critically misunderstand what made the original work.

Which is a valid form of Literary Criticism, as Ursula K Le Guinn once said:

 It doesn’t occur to the novice that a genre is a genre because it has a field and focus of its own; its appropriate and particular tools, rules, and techniques for handling the material; its traditions; and its experienced, appreciative readers—that it is, in fact, a literature. Ignoring all this, our novice is just about to reinvent the wheel, the space ship, the space alien, and the mad scientist, with cries of innocent wonder. The cries will not be echoed by the readers. Readers familiar with that genre have met the space ship, the alien, and the mad scientist before. They know more about them than the writer does.

The Todorkis aren't all to blame for Toya. Natsu, Fuyumi and Shoto are innocent:

You're right. It's just easier to refer them as the Todorokis then specifying "Enji and Rei" each time.

You didn't mention Shoto once in this post:

I have no cricism for Shoto's role in all this. In fact I think he's the best written part. I praise it here.

Shoto is a good boy, and he deserved to spend more time with his brother. The fact he won't be able to sit down and have dinner of him, is the greatest tragedy of them all.

[undiscovered-horizon]

[Although you reciprocate Sanji's affection, you're not quite ready to let yourself be vulnerable with someone. Love, however, is patient - and Sanji is nothing if not loving.]

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Ningyo Archipelago earned its name from a rather tragic local legend: about a boy who fell in love with a mermaid, ningyo, but he was deathly afraid of the water. He stood on the shore, making a small step towards the sea each day. And the mermaid patiently waited for him, promising that he had nothing to be afraid of because she was looking out for him. Now, depending on who you ask, some of the villagers claim that the mermaid is still waiting for her lover while others are convinced they have already united. You're not quite sure which version you prefer.

At first, the myth seemed a bit cliche to you - undying, unconditional, selfless love. It belongs in a fairytale, along with leprechauns and a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. After all, no reasonable human is deluded enough to throw away their life for a love that may be. If Hell is paved with good intentions, then empty promises decorate its gates.

But your dismissal of the local legend quickly dissipates as guilt and longing tighten your chest:

Sanji.

You tried to keep him out at first, out of mercy for your own patchwork heart. Told yourself that each of his sweet words and skilfully crafted compliments were a consequence of his persona and not intimate feelings. But no matter how warily you guarded your heart, he still managed to find a way in. Some juvenile, innocent part of you wanted to welcome his affection with open arms, scream at the top of your lungs that you yearn for him in equal measure as he longs for you. However, the other aspect of you, the one that remembers the horrors you've seen and still feels the dread lingering under your skin after... well, everything - that part begs you to keep your feelings at bay or get a grip on yourself and quit this nonsense. What if you open up to Sanji and he finds you gruesome? Will he see your torn heart only to think its baggage too heavy? Or if... the history repeats itself.

No. Never. You can't let it happen again.

But then, you also can't live like this, hidden within yourself forever. You don't want to. Time goes on, yet you're stuck in place.

This fight with your own mind and soul has brought you to this quiet evening by the campfire. Archipelago's natives are most hospitable people, rejoicing at the handful of guests that have come to their shores. A night filled with delicacies, local moonshine, dances you knew no steps of. It all made for a heartfelt, happy celebration. Hours went by, soon energy dissipated and intoxication kicked in. One by one, both your friends and the natives fell asleep.

The last people standing are, as if fortune smiled down on the island, Sanji and you. He's sitting on the ground, back leaning against a log as he stares at the fire, thinking about something. Once in a while, he takes a sip of his drink. The light of untamted, yellow flames waltz across his face. Staring at him from afar, you wonder whether his hair would smell of campfire smoke if you snuggled to his side. Would the colour of his eyes turn closer to indigo in the darkness of the night?

You shake your head slightly. If you want to finally have this much-belated conversation with him, you need to think straight. You can fantasize about Sanji after he gives you a positive answer.

A playful smile enters Sanji's face when he notices you approaching. "Am I drunk or is that really an angel coming my way?" Despite the amount of alcohol he's consumed, he doesn't slur his words.

"More of a Devil's consort," you answer as you sit down next to him on the ground. Thankfully, your half-serious comment covers well your tension.

It's almost self-sabotage on your part that you sat a mere inch away from him. Something about his presence scrambles your thoughts, turning carefully prepared monologue into disjointed daydreams about the man next to you.

"You can lead me astray if you want," Sanji retorts in a low voice. If only he knew how much you'd love to.

Your breath hitches in your throat as your chest tightens further. Some primal fear residing in your bones tells you to run away, to discard the love you think you're feeling and stay in your safe, alienated shell. So what if he may be the best thing that has ever happened to you if this heartache he's bound to leave will surely be the final nail in your coffin.

"Right, about leading you..." you begin in a trembling voice.

The fear makes it hard to breathe, which doesn't escape Sanji's attention.

"What's going on, sweetheart?" he asks in a soft, concerned voice as his hand gently lays on top of yours.

You clench your other hand into a fist. The only way out of this situation is through and you're not sure if your both brave and strong enough to make the journey. Your fingernails will surely leave marks on the soft skin on the inside of you palm.

"I'm not oblivious to your advances, Sanji," you finally blurt out. The bluntness of your tone is a little too harsh than you wanted. "You're quite up-front about your feelings. And I..." you hang your voice. The words simply refuse to come out of your mouth as though a witch had put a curse on you.

"No, I get it," he nods along. Sanji's expression falls like he's about to crumble. He clenches his jaw before forcefully making himself continue in a sombre tone. "You don't like me in the same way. It's fine, really. I might die of a broken heart first but I'll be fine."

Dear Gods above and below, this is going way worse than your "What can go wrong?" scenario.

"It's not that, Sanji!" you exclaim suddenly. Equally quick you mumble an apology upon seeing Sanji's startled expression. Then, he furrows his eyebrows further, growing even more worried about you. The adoration and pain in his eyes break something in you. It's as if your consciousness has taken a step back and allowed a flood of words to spill out of your mouth. "I wish I could find the words to express how much you mean to me. That you're the only thing on my mind, day and night. But I've been through shit you don't even know about and I just... I think I need some time before we can act on our feelings."

We.

What a nice word. To be part of a union with another; to belong to someone. To never truly be alone.

The worry disappears from his beautiful, blue eyes. In turn, their expression becomes softer than you've ever seen. Sanji moves the hand that lay on top of yours to intertwine your fingers.

"I'll wait for you," he says casually, as though it's the most obvious thing in the world.

Although you did consider this as a possible outcome, you never actually believed he'd say that. You weren't prepared for someone to be selfless towards you. It's never happened before.

"You don't have to," you try to dismiss him. Everything will be easier, but not better, if he changes his mind. "The world is filled with amazing people, I'm sure there's someone else who will love you better."

"I've already found the one I had been looking for, sweetheart," he answers slowly. Sanji brings your hand up to his lips and places a fleeting, chaste kiss on your skin. The softness of it all makes you want to cry and claw your own heart out. Why does it feel so good and so frightening at the same time?

"I don't know how long it will take me to get comfortable and open up." Your throat is too tight to speak comfortably. Tears pool in your eyes. "To be vulnerable with you."

"I will wait for you for an eternity if I have to. Whatever you need, just ask, little love."

Why does he have to love you beyond reason? Why is it so easy for him to break down your walls?

"I'm not sure I'm worth all this trouble," you whisper your confession into the silence of the night.

"Don't ever think you're a burden," he reprimands you. "You deserve only the best and I will be the happiest man alive if you let me be the one to provide. I love you more than you can imagine. I want to spend the rest of my life proving it to you."

Having no strength to hold back, you burst into tears. Is it the relief that he's willing to put up with your fears? Or maybe the happiness that he still chooses to love you? It's hard to say. Your vision is blurry as tears roll down your cheeks. No matter how much you try to control yourself, you can't.

Sanji gently wipes away your tears. His gesture is almost fearful as though the worst thing he could do is force his affection too fast for your comfort. What if he hurts you? In Sanji's mind, there's no greater sin he could commit.

"Can I hold you?" he whispers his question.

"Yes, please," you manage to babble between sniffles.

He puts his hand under your knees and effortlessly places you across his lap. Sanji's arms wrap tightly around your quivering body. His hold feels like a sanctuary.

"Thank you for telling me," he says quietly against your hair. "It was very brave of you."

You don't answer, only further nuzzling into his shoulder. Huh... He does smell of campfire smoke.

[vampiretendencies]

sfw alphabet — jj maybank

warning; fluff, angst, maybe suggestive, mentions of jj’s dad, mentions of pregnancy pairings; jj maybank x fem!reader authors note; posting old piece from my drafts, hope you’re all well and have full bellies <3 cred to owner of the gif and the sfw prompts (@/afghrodite )

A = FFECTION (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection? do they enjoy pda?)

He wants any and everything that you will give him. No one can ever change my mind that his first love language is physical touch. There is never a moment where his fingertips are not lingering on your skin. All the time, however, whenever.

Any form of affection will do for JJ, as long as he knows you’re present and that you’re there for him to hold and hang onto whenever he needs.

He longs to kiss the small skin behind your ear, paint your neck in kisses, and every other crevice that he can possibly reach.

He wants to breathe in your air, feel you in his lungs.

To get beneath your skin.

And he absolutely shows PDA, whether it be in the middle of grocery store he’s going to passionately love on you in front of everyone.

“J, there’s people staring!”

He would pull you flush into him, whilst you inspected an apple in the produce isle to see if it was the one you wanted. Such a craving ache to feel your skin against his.

“Don’t give a fuck, need you now, baby.”

The apple would bounce on the tiled floor, and he would leave you speechless by placing a slow and saccharine kiss to your lips. Molding perfectly, just how he liked and he would never get enough of that.

B = EAUTY (what is their favorite part of their partner. body part, trait, anything?)

Your hands. He absolutely loves how small your hands would be compared to his. How needy they look when they graze his frame, how intricately they fit into his much larger ones, and because they’re your hands they belong to you. And anything that’s traceable of you, he adores.

Both hands palm down on the bathroom counter.

“Love those lil’ things.”

He crossed his pinky over yours, so you’d get a hunch as to what he was referring to.

‘My hands?”

“Course’ baby. In every way.”

C = OMFORT (how do they comfort their partner? ex. after a panic attack or bad dream?)

It’s practically a given that he would never want you to be in harms way. He’s going to be there to walk you through every step of coming down from the fear, wallowing in the fact that he’d simply hurt the way his lover hurt.

So, an empath but only for you. He doesn’t give many people the pleasure of seeing that side of him.

If a panic attack were to ammense;

He’d pull you gently onto his lap and whisper the sweetest things he could muster, and that the panic wouldn’t be permanent.

“S’okay m’right here, baby.”

“Breathe with me …”

“Gonna’ get through this okay?”

D = EVOTED (how devoted are they in a relationship?)

The relationship is his most prized possession, and the only thing he’s held that close to his heart in years. He’s fully all in and wouldn’t want it any other way. There isn’t a doubt in his mind that you are his person, and he wants that for as long as humanly possible.

He gives you his full devotion, no one has his attention like you.

He’d definitely be one to say “If you’re tired of me, then take a nap, baby.”

E = NDING (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

It would definitely have to be something tragic enough, like if cheating was involved.

But he would never fathom breaking up with you.

Because, living a life without you is not a life he could envision living.

If he absolutely had to, if he was at his wits end— he’d more than likely, text you or have one of the Pogues do it for him.

As we have established, he hates confrontation and will avoid expressing his feelings to people for fear of himself. All JJ has known is how to survive, and protect himself and the cause of the relationship ending would be his ultimate downfall.

He wouldn’t be able to cope, so having someone do his dirty work is the simplest route he could go.

F = UTURE (what is their ideal future with an s/o? marriage? how would they be domesticly?)

Try as he might, JJ has sort of always been envious with the idea of marriage. Despite all odds though, he would see himself settling down with you. He wants what he never got in life— desiring to allow you to know his heart and give himself free will to wake up next to you for the rest of his years.

“I couldn’t picture getting married before I met you.”

“How come?”

He’d twist the ends of your hair around his finger, stuck in a trance.

“Never felt this loved before.”

G = ENTLE (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He treats you like an ethereal princess, you are his little baby.

Physically— when he touches you every movement is more delicate than the last, frightened that even if he breathes wrong he’ll break you. Lingering around with touches that are sensational.

“Gotta’ be gentle with my baby, alright?”

“You always are, J.”

Emotionally— he tries his upmost to be positive that he won’t damage or corrupt you. He has the worse time expressing his own emotions so it would be twice as horrifying for him to witness yours falling apart and not know what to do. But he’s fragile with you emotionally, no trace of tears should ever be left on your face in his sight.

“Wouldn’t ever fuck with your head like that.”

He was referring to the couple going at eachothers throat on the TV.

“Hope not.”

“Never pretty girl.”

H = UGS (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

This shouldn’t even be a question. He longs for hugs, any formation of his body against yours, he’s all over that.

He does every millisecond of the day without fail.

Brushing your teeth, calls for a hug from behind every morning.

The sensation of you against him, made him feel like he had all the power in the world. It’s freeing, and it always feels like the first time with his heart thumping every which way.

Do not ever deny him a hug, because he will pout like a small child all day.

“Why the fuck are you always all over her?” Kie grumbled, eyes rolling just a tad.

“Can’t get enough of her Kie, what can I say?”

I = NTUNE (how intune are they with their s/o's emotions? can they read their s/o well?)

He can read you like a book, like the back of his hand. It’s like he can sense it everywhere throughout his being. Just because he doesn’t know how to handle all emotions, doesn’t mean he can’t immediately sense when somethings wrong with his baby.

He proceeds to notice the glint in your eye.

“Who pissed you off now?”

“Just been a rough day.”

“Let me help you baby.”

J = EALOUSY (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?)

He’s going to fucking maul someone that does a double take in your direction. Pummel them, knock their brains from their skulls, whatever it takes. However, it does take a lot for another's gaze to get under JJ's skin; knowing full-well that he can fight and that what you and him have is unbreakable. But, the main thing JJ does when he's jealous is seat you in his lap or pull you closer into him if you aren't already; or give you endless kisses to make others envy the shared love he has with his girlfriend.

"Gonna' let them know you're mine okay pretty baby?"

"Let ‘em know, J."

K = ISSES (good kisser? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?)

100% guaranteed that JJ is an undeniably impeccable kisser. He’s had much experience before you, with flings and hookups. But when he found that your lips fit more accurate with his than anyone else’s, he was sold.

His favorite places to kiss you are the most untouched places, the places that don’t get enough recognition. He dares to show them more attention. So the inside of your wrist, the nape of your neck, the small of your back— something so intimate about the many crevices. He’d pay them special attention each and every time.

JJ likes to be kissed anywhere on his face, but mainly his lips because he felt your love that you have for him through the gesture. He was obsessed with the way the pairs of mouths would glide together, and fall apart— ravishing in every second of it.

And you never went unkissed. Therefore, don’t forget his kisses or he’s falling apart.

“Where’s my ‘see you later’ kiss?”

“You didn’t give me a chance to-“

He envelopes your lips with his, before you can continue speaking.

“Yeah that’s what I thought.”

L = LOVE LANGUAGE (what is their love language? gift giving? quality time?)

As it has already been mentioned. His love language is physical touch, he always wants to be recognized by you with loving and touching and being full of you— missing you in his bones. Though his second love language, is quality time. Because if in some dire circumstance that he wouldn’t be able to touch you at least he’ll know you’re with him— sulking in every ounce of the infatuation the lovers shared. He appreciated you being in his presence, and just creating moments and memories together— living life.

“Found this recipe for us to try tonight baby … s’got all the stuff you like in it.”

Nuzzling in a way for quality time, not a second more spent away from you.

“Sounds perfect J.”

M = MEMORIES (what are their favorite memories with their s/o or family?)

By far, his favorite memory is when he got you high for the first time and your were talking out of your ass. You were saying so much off the wall shit, JJ swore the muscles of his stomach never hurt more from laughing so vigorously. He always comes back to that memory because it encompasses the relationship so well, and he’d always want to relive it.

“How do you think medicine just knows what part of you is hurting?”

He’d sigh into your neck, placing a small peck there before laughing again. “Don’t know baby, m’not a doctor.”

“Can you be my doctor? You’d be such a hot doctor!”

“Want me to fix you all up pretty girl?”

“Mhm, make me all better.”

N = ICKNAMES (what do they call their partner?)

JJ is a nickname type of guy okay! He loves showering you with nicknames. His all time favorite though was baby, because you were undoubtedly his little baby. He treats you like one, he aches for the way it slips of his tongue and he knows you’ll come running. Pretty girl is his second favorite, because you were so alluring in his eyes that you were declared the prettiest woman in OBX. And the girl stems from, you simply being his girl and no one else’s.

He uses them any and every chance he gets, hell at this point does he even know your real name?

You tended to go for J, because it was something no one else called him. It was your own, like he was your own. And you could keep it that way, the single J in JJ was reserved for you, and only you. Baby was thrown in there too.

Several instances he’d require a nickname;

“Baby will you turn off the alarm.”

“Gonna go to JB’s for some beers, pretty girl.”

“You don’t need a chair, my lap is your own personal chair baby.”

O = PEN (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He is not necessarily closed off, but after having no role model in life to teach him how to express his emotions he tended to sit with them until he could fully process them enough to tell you. When he is ready he’ll come to you, like a sad puppy ready to vent then. Like the first time he told you I love you, he’d known for about 3 months. But he couldn’t find the correct way to say it, either that or he’d back out.

“Don’t know’ s’just when m’around you my heart does this thing … where it’s gonna fly straight out of my chest and I just can’t control it.”

“Is it love … maybe?”

“Always have I guess, because that feeling hasn’t went away. It’s worsened baby.”

P = ATIENCE (how easily angered are they?)

When it comes to patience, JJ has the utmost amount for you, it could go on for multitudes. He was wrapped around your finger, always had a hard time telling you no, and vice versa. It’s also because JJ has walked on egg shells his entire life, constantly getting attacked and belittled by his father— so any given circumstance he has patience to avoid a sour outcome. He knew bumping heads was bound to happen but he always ran away from it. His patience is key, and that’s what keeps JJ centered.

You’d asked him nearly a thousand times if the shirt you were wearing looked fine, and he’s just as amused as he was the first time. Patience not wavering one bit.

Why not make it a thousand and one?

“J, are you sure this shirt doesn’t make me look slouchy?”

“Prettiest slouch I’ve ever seen.”

He was toying with you, picking fun only to receive a glare in turn.

“JJ!”

“Okay, okay … you look fuckin’ phenomenal baby.”

Q = UALITY TIME (how would they spend time with a partner? what are dates like?)

If he’s not working he’s with you, the Pogues even teased him about soaking in all his time with you. But he wouldn’t have it any other way, he is always coming up with little schemes and plans as to how to spend essential time together— something worth remembering.

Unable to keep his hands off of you, Romantic, everlasting and with a twist from JJ.

His ideal date though is on the beach, feet gently getting washed by water as the two of you are sat on a picnic blanket. Drinking beers, smoking weed, a little food here and there. His dates are not well thought out at first, as even though it’s supposed to be a surprise he still asks for you help on little things. Merely flattered by even the gesture, the effort mattered most.

“I wanna stay here with you for a lifetime .. gonna’ love you and never leave, baby.”

“We can’t stay here forever though, the sand is gonna’ have imprints of our asses.”

R = ANDOM HEADCANON

You helped him start journaling, he was iffy at first because though he has patience for you he doesn’t have the patience to write multiple sentences down about how he felt.

So you convinced him to take it one sentence at a time, that it would help him cope even just a little bit with the scarring hurt and pain he’s dealt with in his life.

And you persuaded him.

Something to give him routine, and to subsist for a second.

“So glad you introduced this to me baby, my heart doesn’t feel so heavy.”

You’d kiss his temple gently, and his eyes closed at the comfort.

“Anything to help, J”

S = ECURITY (how protective are they?)

JJ will walks to the ends of this earth to be positive you are safe. Whether that be from Kooks, or from someone that tried to hold the door open for you knowing full well you have a boyfriend beside you. He’d be ranked in overprotective, but in the best way possible and for all the right reasons. He’s overpowering with it when need be. You found it attractive simply because of that. But he’s not toxic, or nasty. He’s just JJ.

“So you don’t care how long I’m gone for?”

“Course’ baby, just let me know that you’ve gotten there safe.”

T = TINY ONES (how do they feel about kids? how would they act with kids?)

If it is a teen pregnancy, JJ is hesitant at first because he can’t even take care of himself led alone an actual real life child. But, if it happens he can’t control it, he took part in making it so he will fully own up to that baby. He will take care of it with his life.

Later in life, if you were to get pregnant JJ would absolutely be captivated by it. JJ always wanted kids that he’d be able to give everything to that he didn’t have as a child. A mother that’s present, a dad that loves them unconditionally, and childhood that will be memorable.

He just always envisioned having children somewhere down the line, maybe a dog or two, and his sweet girl.

“Gonna’ have so many babies with you.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm, gonna give them all to you.”

U = UPSET (how do they act after a fight? Would they be the first to apologize?)

He is like a lost dog, he doesn’t know what the fuck to do with himself. And he’s going to fall apart, because everything in his life feels like it’s coming to an end. So every fight silence would fall over the two of you, he’d assume you were thinking about leaving him. Little did he know you just wanted to pluck his forehead for annoying you. He doesn’t want to always be the first to apologize, but he gives into that pride and always apologizes. Mainly because he can’t go more than ten minutes without hearing your voice or touching you.

“Baby, you have to come out eventually.”

His fist clung to the bathroom door after you’d been locked in there for the past thirty minutes due to some idiotic argument.

“No, m’busy being mad at you.”

“Stop being mad and love me.”

V = ALUE (how important is the relationship to them? what is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?)

The relationship is his first priority. He cherishes it, as it has both healed him and helped him all at once. He values it above all, if he loses this then he officially will feel as though he’s lost any hope in his life. He treasures it, and wants it to linger and fester on like a cut that scars and the scar never goes away.

You were never going away.

It comes above beer, weed, and maybe even the rest of the Pogues in certain circumstances.

“Starting to save up so that we can have our own place.”

“J, we don’t have to do it now if we’re not ready-“

“No I want this, baby.”

W = HOLE (would they feel incomplete without you? what is their worst fear, what causes a hole in their heart?)

He going to crumble. Chasing a high that he knows he won’t ever feel again as long as he’s not with you. Trying everything just to feel something, he’d be fucking miserable. Losing you was losing himself because you were what he based the entirety of the rest of his life around. It definitely would cause a massive, unfillable, black-hole in his heart that would not be able to be healed by another. Your love kept him going, it was his fuel and he knew it was unhealthy. But when you live a life without love being reciprocated, it’s so deathly hard to not let go of it when you actually get it.

“What the fuck am I supposed to do without her John B?”

“I don’t know but you’ve gotta’ do something man, you’re stinkin’ up my house. Jesus! Go shower.”

X = XENOS (what is something about them that is strange? something that most wouldn't like)

He likes licking your face … like genuinely he likes licking you. He likes watching you squirm as he does it, feeling his tongue against your smooth skin. Most couldn’t tolerate his wet tongue salivating all over them, but you put up with his odd habit because it was JJ. Tasting of the warmest vanilla.

“JJ, do you really have to lick my face in broad daylight?”

“What’s wrong with that?”

Y = ANK (what do they do that makes their partner mad? that makes one wanna yank they ass?)

JJ Maybank does not clean up after himself and it grinds your fucking gears. If he eats cereal and the milk is almost empty, he puts it back in the refrigerator instead of throwing it away. Beer cans will be stepped on, because after he drinks them he chucks it at whatever is in front of him. Old clothes are everywhere, hence the reason he can never find anything to wear. But at least he wasn’t a total slob, so you met in the middle.

“M’this close to choking you if I have to pick up your toothbrush again.”

“Do it then, baby.”

Z = ZZZ (what are their sleeping habits? do they snore? is the schedule fucked up?]

Cuddles of fucking course. His favorite type is the give you all of him by lying directly on top of you though he knows sometimes it crushes you, he’ll suffice for snuggling you into his chest and combing through your hair. And he is definite on staying that way all night, not being able to sleep properly if you weren’t present. He snores lightly but angelic almost, as he couldn’t image a better sleep than the one he has. He also twitches, he has to be in a deep enough sleep though. It depends on if the two of you decide to have a night out wether or not the sleep schedule is messy, but JJ typically looks forward to the shared night routine so there’s no complaints from him. Sometimes, he will even rush you.

Night time skin care before bed for instance.

“Where’s my face mask at baby?”

He’d tuck his hands into the front pockets of your pajama shorts, peppering fragile kisses to your collar bone.

“On the counter,” you pointed to the sheet mask. “Waiting for you to put it on.”

“But I want you to. You do it better, pretty girl.”

[burquillos]

diluven misses you and so to do i miss it 😔

Will you accept this drabble I have in my notes:

"Don't you like the bard?"

"Whether I like the bard or not hardly accounts for whether I should pursue him or not."

"Actually, I think liking the bard is all the reason you need to pursue him."

Diluc let's out a tired sigh. He doesn't want to have to explain Venti's kind of secret alter ego to Kaeya of all people. He's exhausted. He wants to go home.

But things have been going well with Kaeya lately and he was happy when they started opening up to each other again on this particular night. Well, up until Kaeya opened up the conversation about his love life. Kaeya had always pestered him about it, even as a kid. Both him and his father, ever the romantics.

Though annoyed, he appreciates the sentiment because he knows it comes from a place of genuine concern. Keaya wants reassurance that he will be fine and that someone will take care of him and love him even when him and his father aren't there. Knowing Kaeya, not wanting him to be alone is deeply valuable. However...

"It's complicated" Diluc scowls.

Kaeya leans on his forearm on the counter. He looks at Diluc, unamused.

"You like him. You obviously want to be with him. And from the looks of it he likes you back. What's so complicated about that?"

Diluc doesn't respond but he can feel a slight tingling on his fingertips and his cheeks as he stands there tense and frozen.

Kaeya closes his eyes in contemplation, "Ah..I see."

"What?"

"Master Ragnvindr of the Dawn Winery must not be seen engaging in romantic affairs with a mere commoner. How tragic-"

"No."

It was out before he knew it. Said too fast and too defensively to be considered casual. Like letting a part of himself accidentally slip from his tight grasp.

Kaeya couldn't have been more wrong. Venti is far from a mere commoner. His identity as Barbatos is... holy and powerful. The kind of being who can move mountains, literally and figuratively. His whole life he tried to be worthy of only two people and that included his late father and Barbatos.

But even that pales in comparison to Venti himself; kind and compassionate, cunning when he needs to be, he brings joy and laughter to the people of Mondsatdt with his songs. He listens to his people and guides them into action, never hesitating to reach out to others, even a person like him who has built walls around himself.

Venti has a way of seeing through him but has never once used it against him. He keeps the hidden, little pieces of Diluc tucked away and keeps it safe.

He wants to believe that there is something special about that. That that kind of treatment is something Venti gives to him and him alone.

But he knows Venti's love is grand and extends far and wide over Mondsatdt and its citizens. He knows he's nothing more but a speck among countless others that recieve that kind of godly love from him.

As a protector of Mondsatdt, he cannot afford to be selfish with Venti's love, not when Mondstadt needs it more than him. He is quite well off in terms of status and wealth after all. Honestly, Diluc is quite content to love from afar.

In the end, all he could mutter was a soft "He's too good for me..."

Kaeya barks out a laugh, slamming his hand on the table and leaning back. "VENTI!?" he wipes a tear from his eye "You're saying this about Venti?! The drunkard?? The guy who regularly schemes his way for some apples and booze??"

"You know what I mean."

"No. I don't"

"Well I'm not tired enough to have this conversation."

"Fair enough."

Kaeya leaves a few coins on the counter then stands up to leave. Before he could exit the door, he turns back to Diluc. "For the record, he said the same thing about you being too good for him." Finally, he leaves.

Diluc is left staring at the door. He can't quite believe that statement. He's not looking down on himself or anything, he knows he's quite sought after, he even uses that as an advantage when negotiating sometimes.

It's just that, compared to Venti who shines brightly and whose smile literally lights up the room, he feels like such a downer in comparison.

Once upon a time in his life, he might've had the same smile too, but he's changed since then. He's not the golden child with a loving family running around Mondstadt fulfilling his dreams anymore. His fire has long ceased to be kind and burns with rage and vindication instead. He feels as if he can't have that smile back. That if Venti stands next to him and gives him a little grin he can't smile back with the warmth and kindness he deserves. That all Venti would see is a broken man.

He feels too bare with Venti and that is something he cherishes deeply and also something he dreads.

[casscainmainly]

Duke Thomas and the Robin Mantle

There's been some minor discussion about whether Duke counts as an 'official' Robin or not. While that discussion is interesting, I actually don't think it's the crux of the Duke and Robin issue. To me, the question is whether or not he should be Robin. And, to me, the answer is definitively yes.

This is purely my opinion, and I haven't read every single Duke comic so it's possible I've misread/missed things. Any Duke fans, absolutely feel free to add or disprove anything here!

The Changing Robin

The first thing to understand is that Robin, as a mantle, has shifted with each person it's been passed to. Tim's Robin doesn't mean the same thing as Jason's Robin, which doesn't mean the same thing as Damian's. A mark of a true Robin is the ability to shift the meaning of Robin by wearing the colours.

Duke absolutely fulfils this criteria. In fact, him and his We Are Robin crew are the biggest shift in the meaning of Robin since its creation.

Cover from We Are Robin #1. The phrase "We're not sidekicks. We're an army!" signals the shift from Robin as individual to Robin as collective; from Robin as tied to the singular Batman to Robin as a wider movement, a socio-political force. The last question, "are you ready?", is vitally important as well. Duke as Robin is meant to be different. He's meant to be non-normative, a groundbreaking turn in what Robin looks and feels like.

At the end of the first issue, a disguised Alfred (who started We Are Robin) thinks the following:

Alfred infuses the phrase "of color" with two meanings: the Robin colours, and People of Colour. By explicitly linking Robin to POC, the comic is suggesting that not only can kids of colour be Robin, but that they should be Robin. Robins of Colour are the "future of this city," and Duke is the vanguard of this future. It's no coincidence that the Robin before (Damian) and the one after (Maps) are both POC. Duke, however, is the Robin that gives the mantle an explicit direction towards diversity: him and WAR use Robin as a social movement, and in doing so transform the colours of Robin into a symbol for the diversity in Gotham and the world.

Robin as Collective

Duke doesn't change Robin alone. The point of We Are Robin is that Robin is a collective, and it's important that Duke doesn't start WAR (as much as people like to say he did). By joining late, the comic demonstrates that Duke is part of a bigger movement.

The Robin community represents POC solidarity, the necessity and ability of the oppressed to band together. Lee Bermejo ends We Are Robin's final issue with "stress on the word "we"" - Duke's arc, in one sense, is learning to rely and work with others (he initially mistrusts basically everyone). The WAR community is essential to both Duke's character development and his tenure as Robin.

So to have this page, affirming his loyalty and love for them, to be followed immediately by them being written out is... something.

Duke appears next in Batman: Rebirth, where Bruce gives him the yellow suit and tells him he's not looking for a Robin. As soon as he stops being Robin, the community around him quite literally falls apart. Izzy sticks around for a bit but fades into obscurity, Riko and Dax turn evil, Dre ends up in Arkham - all of these fates are antithetical to these characters and genuinely tragic.

Batman: The Secret Files: The Signal is possibly the worst Duke story in existence, but it's important to understanding why Robin!Duke mattered. Riko calls Signal 'Bat-Signal', highlighting his sudden reduction to a Batman acolyte. His friends turning on him shows how, by losing Robin, he also lost the community formed by WAR. In every way, his transition into the Signal was saturated by loss.

Robin Doesn't Need A Batman

Bruce giving Duke the Signal suit is borderline insulting. He already had an identity predicated on the fact that he didn't need Batman.

From Batman (2011) #45, Batman: Rebirth, and Night of the Monster Men. "Robin doesn't need a Batman" is an inversion of Tim's 'Batman needs a Robin' - in many ways, Duke is the opposite of Tim, who's rich, White, and whose Robin is the most focused on helping Batman. If Tim is the ideal Robin-as-partner, Duke is the ideal Robin-as-individual. His idea of Robin is not, and has never been, associated with Batman.

People who say Duke isn't an official Robin since he was never Batman's partner miss the point. He is Robin because he was never Batman's partner. That's what Robin means to him - a mantle free from Bruce and all authority.

"Batman is on the gargoyle. Robin... Robin is on the street." Robin is the person on the ground, who lives and belongs to the people. When Duke becomes Signal, this ground aspect - as well as his separation from Batman - is gone.

In this cover from Batman & The Signal, they gave him a Bat symbol and put him on a gargoyle. They erased every single part of his Robin philosophy.

The Original Robin

Post-We Are Robin, Bruce becomes the Batfam member Duke interacts with the most. Besides the insult of Bruce withholding Robin, this fact also strips away one of my favourite aspects about early Duke - he was tied to the Batfamily through the Robins (especially Damian and Dick), not by Batman.

It's Dick, the original Robin, who chooses him.

Dick recognises that him and Duke have a lot in common. He tells Duke in Robin War that he's "got it," and that he's a natural leader - Dick knows Duke has what it takes to be Robin, and explicitly endorses him.

Not only that, but when Dick sends Duke to jail (along with the other Robins, official and unofficial), he tells Duke that he "take[s] care of [his] family". He basically inducts Duke into the family then and there!

Dick's endorsement of Duke makes it more interesting that Bruce doesn't make him Robin. Despite Duke's disillusionment at the end of Robin War (dispelled soon after in WAR), the events in RW confirm that Duke can and should be Robin. Bruce not making Duke Robin is defying both Duke's potential and Dick's right to choose Robins.

Robin as Family

On the rooftop in Robin War, Dick tells Duke that Robin is about family. This is the fundamental connection between them both: Robin acts as the link to the families they've lost and gained.

For Dick, Robin keeps John and Mary Grayson alive, while also symbolising his connection to Bruce. For Duke, Robin is the intersection of three families: the heroic legacy of his parents, the tight-knit community of We Are Robin, and the newfound friendship of the Batfamily.

In Batman (2011) #45, Duke tries to give his friend Daryl a Robin badge. He says, "you and me, we came up together. We're fam[ily]." Even before Dick, Duke associated Robin with family, and Daryl implies in the next issue that Duke became Robin because of his parents' inclination to help. Signal, of course, also comes from his mom; but unlike Robin, Signal isn't a legacy mantle. As Robin, he constantly inducted people like Daryl, Riko, Damian, etc. into his family. As Signal, his circle shrinks immeasurably, until it's really only the Batfamily and the Outsiders if we're being generous. (Daryl also turns evil - a really unfortunate pattern for Duke side characters).

Lark and Conclusion

I'm going to end with this panel from Batman & The Signal #1, which is emblematic of the way DC has treated Duke and Robin as a whole. Bruce tells Duke that Lark is "too soft" a name. DC was probably debating between Lark and Signal, but it's telling what they went with. How is Lark too soft, exactly? How is it any softer than Robin?

By overtly dismissing the bird-like name, Bruce - and DC editorial, or whoever decided this - is definitively moving Duke away from Robin. And it's a shame. In Duke's transition from Robin to Signal, he has next to no agency. Bruce tells him he's not Robin, Bruce gives him the suit, Bruce tells him not to be Lark, Bruce gives him another suit. It's a stark contrast from his induction into Robin - though Alfred arranged it, he gave Duke a choice. Duke chooses Robin.

Duke being disallowed the Robin mantle is, to me, on par with DC stripping Cass of the Bat symbol during the New 52. The racism behind both these decisions cannot be overstated - both Cass and Duke redefined their mantles, and their mantles defined them. At least Cass' mistake has been corrected, and lots of writers and fans acknowledge how horrible that period was. For Duke, he was never given a real chance. And it's unlikely he ever will be.

This is not a knock against the Signal identity or any writers. However, it genuinely saddens me to think that all of this story potential - Duke's redefinition of Robin, his relationship to Dick, his connection to We Are Robin, and above all his ability to choose who he wants to be - has been neglected and cast aside. Even if they never acknowledge his role as Robin, I hope future stories centre him once again, because it's what he deserves.

[lovelykhaleesiii]

Hi! Can I request a smut modern aemond comforting reader after a family tragedy and she ask him to help take the pain away by distracting her and he gives her comfort segs with lots of love because reader really needs it. Thank you!

Comfort Zone

PAIRING: Aemond Targaryen x fem!girlfriend!Reader [Modern AU]

WORDS: 1,175.

WARNINGS: mentions of death/grief, fluffy!Aemond, Daddy kink, female oral receiving, p in v sexual intercourse, swearing, cum play.

A/N - because I'm delving into my Aemond era again, this was a request I couldn't resist!

Death was an intriguing aspect of life. Not a foreign topic, however scarcely brought about in day to day conversation. It was taboo for most people, until faced with.

You had lost your beloved great aunt tragically. An inevitable loss, yet no less profound. She was dear to you, her existence was significant in your life, throughout your childhood to the grown woman you had become now.

Mayhaps, death had ended her own suffering, yet brought about your very own. You wept for her, mourned for her, and grieved with others family and strangers alike that knew of her. Days since the funeral, one constant remained at your sorrowful side, the warmth and relentless comfort of your boyfriend, Aemond. He refused to leave you alone, knowing how remarkable her loss was for you.

Whatever you desired and needed, he would summon in a heartbeat for you. Nonetheless, despite the circumstances, you had grown even more intimate with one another...

“Baby, what's the matter? You've been quiet since I've come..."

It was true: normally you would be a bit more upbeat basking in Aemond's comforting presence. You had no doubt that eventually time would heal your loss. Although, you knew some days would be easier than others, and today proved that. Running some mundane errands, you had come across something that ignited a core memory, a happy one of that, and yet you felt only for a fleeting second, a happiness, before the anguish struct you instantly, catching you off guard, you felt vulnerable and exposed to the elements. Rushing home, you immediately called for Aemond to come and see you, to watch a movie or anything to distract your mind. Without question, Aemond arrived a few solid minutes later, pulling up to your gravel driveway, with a bag full of your favourite snacks and goodies, he knew you would appreciate.

"N-Nothing, babe. I-I just saw something that reminded me of her-"

You had both been laying cosily, snugged together in the warm softness of your bed. Aemond kept an arm tightly wrapped around you, thinking all the distance had been spared, he somehow managed to tug you in closer against him. His other hand, softly brushing aside your loose strands of hair.

“Oh, baby—”

“It’s okay, Aem, really—”

“No, no it’s not. From the moment I came in, I knew you weren’t yourself. Tell me, what can I do.”

Your intrusive thoughts rocked backwards and forwards trying to decide whether the truth was fitting or not. Somewhat ashamed of what you truly desired.

"I-If I'm being honest, Aem... I just need a distraction. I don't want to feel this feeling anymore, I hate it. I-I just wanna feel good again."

The momentary, tense silence that filled the room had ceased, as Aemond nodded to your honest words, merely responding to no coherent sounds other than a "hmm."

Just as you were about to resume the film, adjusting your position to something more comfortable, Aemond swiftly intercepted your movements, lifting you and pinning you down against the plush mattress. His body leaning over your own, the sudden exchange had caught you off-guard yet you did not question him. By the unapologetic look in his hungry eyes, you knew precisely that he understood your needs.

"I think I can make you feel good again, baby. If you'll let me, hmm?"

You spared no exhaustion contemplating an answer, as you rapidly nod in agreement, encouraging his motives.

Guiding himself down, you found yourself in a compromising position: as your bright boyfriend, occupied himself intently, slowly pulling your panties down below, skirt lifted up, as he exposed your eager cunt face to face with his curved smile.

"Angel wants to feel good again, Daddy can make that happen. Daddy only wants what's best for his angel."

Like an ignorant pup, your obedient nods fall flat as your head rests back against the comforting bed, bucking your hips forward, your throbbing folds collide with Aemond's keen, moist lips. His long, ravenous tongue prying you open, as he nestles his head against your cunt, burying his face between.

His mouth suckles on your wetness, guzzling at your velvet folds, with his tongue lapping at your tingling bud. Your helpless moans begin to fill the vicinity of the room, as your hands find themselves tightly gripping and pulling at his strands of hair.

"Gentle, baby, gentle- So eager for me, huh? Angel's been craving for this for a while, my poor baby."

"Mhmm-Y-Yes-"

His occasional bursts to utter filth were not sparing enough in seconds to regain some sense. Your mind flutters back and forth from worldly consciousness, to sheer mindless ecstasy.

"Yes, what, angel? Don't you dare think you can forget your manners, now."

"Y-Yes, Daddy."

He had resumed long enough without uttering a word more, enough to have your folds slicked with your wetness, his mouth completely coated in your glistening mess. By the way he desperately wiped at his mouth, licking your ooze off his fingers, he was enamoured by your taste, like a man devouring his last meal, before removing his clothes with ease.

"On Daddy's lap, angel. Spread your legs for me- That's it, good girl-"

Softly tapping at your thigh, one hand snaked around your flesh, as his palm met with your ass cheek: the other preoccupied with guiding your hips down, planting his aching, hard cock deep inside of you. Your walls clenched tightly around him, engulfing his long length, feeling his tip thrusting viciously against your clit. Engulfing his mass, you swore you could feel the vibrations between your dull throbs in sync with his pulsating cock, sending electric chills down your naked spine.

His warm, blush lips remained latched to your soft skin, as he firmly suckled on the meat of your tit, his teeth nibbling gently against your flesh.

"D-Daddy makes me f-feel s-so good. W-What would I d-do without you?" Your stuttering words echoed closely against his ear, your nails digging and clawing into the pale skin of his lean shoulders and muscular back. You caught a fleeting glimpse of the reddened nail marks etching against his fair skin, before your eyes shut close with lust.

"Angel gets what she deserves- umghf- Been such a good fucking girl, taking care of everyone, but who's taking care of you?"

His muscular chest heaving with every breathless word uttered from his defined lips. Your sweat beaded body bobbing up and down, pressed closely against his own, you had never felt as intimate with him until now.

"D-Daddy takes care of m-me."

"That's right, s-so fucking right-"

For a few, endless nights it seemed and felt like, Aemond remained lovingly by your side. Whatever you desired and needed, he was at your beck and call. His company provided a distraction, although it eased the pain of your loss eventually. The hardship you endured, he endured with you, cementing your love towards one another. He was your comfort zone, however dire the situation may be, you knew you could endure anything, with him by your side.

general taglist - @succnfuccubus @fan-goddess @malfoytargaryen @bibli0thecary @m1ndbrand @connorsui @elegantsplendour @sylasthegrim @arcielee @s-we-e-t-t-ea @sahvlren @watercolorskyy @hypnos-daughter-certified @urmomsgirlfriend1 @backyardfolklore @snowprincesa1 @aegonslawyer @hightowhxre

Aemond taglist - @megatardisbaby

@harrypotteranna23-blog

credit for divider - @/itbmojojoejo

[bucketsofmonsters]

The Witch's Apprentice - Part 5

cw: demon summoning, prolonged isolation, size difference, non-human genitalia, oral sex, agoraphobia, magical branding, more tags will be added as the story continues

male demon x afab reader

Word count: 4k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6  Part 7

By your third week of being locked in your room, you felt like you might lose your mind. 

Considering you’d been locked in the house for years you’d think the room wouldn’t be so bad. The actual space wasn’t that much smaller but the real problem was that there was nothing to do. Everything you’d been busying yourself with for years was locked outside, your books, your garden, your best friend. 

Any pretense of freedom had disappeared. You could no longer go outside, chose what to do with your day, or see another living thing. 

Well, most living things.

Eden had soundproofed all of the rooms for her own usage, so no one overheard anything she didn’t want them to. She knew how to break through it and project sound through the walls, something you’d never learned to do. However, you had no qualms about using the soundproofing to your advantage. 

Lucien was less and less incredulous with every new time you summoned him. What do you want’s turned into easy greetings and his exasperation with you faded, although he seemed loathe to let you notice. 

The summonings had become almost daily events. 

You never made it more than an hour or two without at least giving it a shot. Your lack of actual summoning materials or techniques made it so he didn’t strictly have to come, could just decide not to show up, but he almost always did, choosing to stay with you for hours on end. 

Every now and then he’d drop out, feeling a tug of being summoned by some other witch before he’d pop back, unsummoned and of his own choosing. 

Today you were laying back on your bed while he sat on the floor. Even sitting, he was tall enough that your heads were roughly in line with one another. 

You never did much. You would ask him question after question and watch as his answers got more and more evasive, not even to hide anything but seemingly doing it just because he could. He spoke in circles just to watch your head spin and see how long it would take before the questions stopped in favor of throwing pillows at him. 

All the pillows lay scattered around him leaving you tragically out of ammo. You supposed you’d just have to hope that he’d had a change of heart in his neverending quest to irritate you. 

It never worked. Not really. 

Even if it weren’t for the boredom that made you cling to every word, there way something almost charming about his refusal to commit to an answer, to dance around the question and try and make you forget what you’d originally asked, regardless of whether he cared about you knowing the answer or not. It felt almost like a game. 

“What does it feel like when you get summoned?” you asked, curious what happened on his end when he got that distant look in his eyes. 

“Why, do you think you're getting summoned?” he asked with a laugh. “Is there another witch out there who wants to lock you in an even smaller room?”

“Stop it. She’s just worried.”

“Uh-huh. How long do you think this is going to last?” he asked, staring out at your locked door with blatant disgust. 

You were less evasive with your answers. “I don’t know. If it lasts longer I might actually lose it.”

“So let me take you somewhere. Come on, I’ll have you back before you know it.”

Where the teasing and talking in circles was entertaining, this was your biggest point of contention. Lucien had become fixated on getting you out of here, on showing you the world. 

You’d be lying if you said part of your apprehension to leave wasn’t fear. It had been so long, even talking to him had been such a big step. You couldn’t imagine just being somewhere new. 

But you also couldn’t do that to Eden, betray her trust like that. No matter how many times he reassured you that she would never know, it left a churning feeling in your stomach. She’d been there for you for so many years, kept you safe. You couldn’t just leave her like that, behind her back. 

You avoided the topic as often as you could. Other than those little arguments, seeing him had absolutely become the best part of your day. 

You supposed that wasn’t hard to do. You spent most of the time he wasn’t there sleeping, What else was there to do?

You told him as much and he couldn’t quite manage to hide the flash of pity that crossed his face, the one that showed up whenever you mentioned your current living situation. 

He did his best to push past it. “Have you been having fun dreams?” he asked with a grin. 

You tried to brush off the comment despite his suggestive tone and allusion back to what he’d seen before. “They’re fine. Why don’t you show up in them anymore?”

“Just fine? Maybe dream me needs some pointers.” 

You leaned off the bed, reaching for the pillow that lay closest to you on the floor. You managed to get a grip on it right as you started to slide off the bed but Lucien pushed you back up before you could fall to the floor. 

He was rewarded for his efforts by a pillow flying towards him that collided with one of his horns as you let out a quiet harrumph. 

“You’re so rude to me. And why are you asking? I’m here all the time, do you miss me?” he asked, cooing at you with faux sympathy. “Because if you want me there all you have to do is ask.”

“None of that was an answer to my question,” you informed him, well aware it wouldn’t get you anywhere. 

He rolled his eyes. “You’re much more fun when your inhibitions are gone.”

“Mmhmm, I’m sure. And do you take a lot of humans to your little sin room?”

“Only the cute ones.”

You snorted. “Yeah, sure.”

“I could take you back there.”

“You are so shameless. If you want me to get all loose and flirty again just bring some wine by or something.”

“Not like that. I just think it would be good for you to get out, stretch your legs.”

“For the last time, I’m staying right here.”

“Suit yourself,” he said with a huff, as if there was even the smallest chance that he’d finally give up on the idea. “If it were me, I would have killed that bitch by now.”

“Stop it! You will not talk about her like that!” Your defense of Eden was as reflexive as ever. You knew he had every right to be unimaginably angry at her but she was still your best friend, your savior. 

His inevitable upcoming protest was cut off by your dinner being slid under the door, Lucien keeping absolutely still as the metal tray scraped against the floor. 

He hated being here when she was nearby, even if she wasn’t interacting with you much these days. He claimed it was because he didn’t want to get you in even more trouble and get any more of your freedoms taken away. 

You were sure that was part of it. But you saw the way he tensed up when she got close, when any sign appeared of her existence right on the other side of the door. 

He was afraid of her. Absolutely terrified. 

It made your heart ache, seeing him like that, seeing the fractures in his facade. You couldn’t help but wonder what she’d done to him to make him act like this. 

Not that he’d ever tell you. You knew better than to push that point, it was one secret he was more than entitled to. 

You did your best not to dwell on it too much. If you did you’d have to reflect on the way he always put himself between you and the door, the way he tensed up whenever she called out to you, knowing you couldn’t even respond unless she allowed it through the soundproofing.  She never did. 

You couldn’t be sure exactly when, maybe when you summoned him on your own the first time, maybe when you’d told him about all the years you’d spent stuck in this cabin surrounded by the vicious woods, maybe when you’d broken that summoning circle and trusted him, but at some point he’d decided that you were just as much Eden’s victim as he was. Some mysterious point where something switched in his mind and it moved from being you and her against him to Eden against the two of you. 

You didn’t blame him for it. Eden had done horrible things to him, that much was clear. He needed her to be a villain and you could give him that. 

Lucien always waited a long time before speaking after she showed up so you just lay there, attempting to sneak glances at him and getting caught every time. 

Eventually his shoulders untensed and he seemed to decide it was safe to speak again, although a simmering anger still burned in his eyes. 

“She isn’t teaching you jackshit.”

“Well…” you attempted to protest before he immediately cut you off. 

“Not a question. I could teach you, you know. Your little witch isn’t the only one who knows magic.”

You laughed. “And what’s the price? You want my soul or something?”

“Please, if I wanted your soul I’d probably just need to ask, your dumbass would just hand it over to me.”

He probably wasn’t that far off the mark, if your history was any indication. 

You shrugged as you replied. “There’s no real point in teaching me anyways, I’m not very good at it.” You weren’t even sure why he was offering, he’d already seen more than enough of you to know you were a lost cause. 

“Being good at things isn't the only reason to do them. Come on, have some fun with it.”

Everything in you screamed that it was a bad idea, that you’d fuck it all up. But the way he was looking at you, daring you to say yes, managed to override those instincts just long enough to squeak out, “Fine. But you’re not allowed to get mad when I mess up.”

You weren’t sure what to expect of Lucien as a teacher. Whatever those confused expectations in the back of your head were, he certainly didn’t match them. 

He was a patient teacher, letting you feel things out quietly and slowly. His jokes and evasiveness disappeared completely and every question you had was met with a careful answer. 

You discovered very quickly that his sort of magic was very, very different from Edens. 

Eden was all about rules, about maintaining the security and purity of her spells first. Everything was a strict ritual to be observed. 

Lucien’s magic contained a freedom you thought couldn’t be afforded to humans. Instead of a list of materials and steps, what you were faced with most frequently now was instructions to shut your eyes and imagine, to put all the trust you had into the idea that when your eyes opened, whatever you imagined would have happened. 

It was something you struggled with. That faith that it would work. 

It wasn’t that you didn’t believe in the magic, you’d seen far too much for that. It was thinking it would work for you that you kept stumbling 

Where Eden’s magic was like a recipe, Lucien’s felt more like a trust fall. 

And still, you progressed. Without the same confidence Lucien carried himself with, but progress nonetheless. 

He brought you little gifts every time you made progress, slivers of the outside world. 

You’d been getting frustrated with yourself. The very first thing he’d tried to teach you was just the ability to reach out to someone. 

You sat there, day after day, attempting it. The way he’d explained it, everyone had an aura, a little pool of energy that hovered around them. If you focused you could reach out, stretch it thin and find someone else’s. 

It had to be close. Not in proximity but in a more abstract sense. He reassured you that the two of you were more than close enough for it to work. 

One night, after he had long since left, you were practicing and getting frustrated once more when you felt that aura of yours he’d described time and time again bump into something warm, and a sense of familiarity washed over you.  

A moment later you felt something back, a meandering sense of something winding inside of you, pulling at some part of you that made you giggle. Who knew auras could be ticklish? 

The next day he came bearing an eclair. It felt like a breath of fresh air. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d been able to eat something sweet like that.  

You treasured the little paper doily it came on, sometimes just tracing the intricate designs that bordered it. 

A few days later was a soft scarf in a bright red that had been given to you when you opened your eyes to find yourself letting off a faint glow in that same red. 

The next time you managed to do something, this time it was simply to warm up a surface by a few degrees, he reached out and handed you a gift he had at the ready. It made your heart swell that he already had it, like he had absolute faith you’d be able to do something to deserve it. This time it was a tiny ceramic fox that had its little head lifted defiantly towards the sky

You kept them all buried under your pillow, terrified that any day now would be the day and Eden would come in to free you only to see mysterious trinkets that could only have come from elsewhere. 

You kept the fox wrapped up in your scarf, afraid you’d roll over wrong in your sleep and it might break but still unwilling to hide the little treasures too far away from yourself. 

More often than not, you woke up clutching them, a habit you couldn’t break no matter how hard you tried. 

Sooner than you ever could have imagined, you weren’t even afraid to make mistakes around him anymore. When you’d begun, you’d been convinced any slip-up would ruin everything, that he’d give up on you and leave you behind. Now you floundered and messed up spells and it didn’t matter. He made sure that you were alright, that it was safe to learn and eventually you figured them all out. 

“I’m running out of rewards,” he said with a chuckle as you beamed down at your fox, one you’d managed to make wobble without so much as touching it. “That’s how you know you’re getting good. How will I ever motivate you now?”

“Are you kidding,” you basically shouted, pride and excitement welling up inside you. “Did you see what I just did? That was amazing! I don’t need a reward to want to learn how to do incredible things.”

“Maybe. I think you deserve them anyways.”

The comment brought a heat to your cheeks, one that was becoming more and more common in you every time Lucien was here. Another thing you tried not to dwell on too much, lest you get swept up in it. 

His head cocked to the side with a familiar look as you gave him an understanding smile. “Off to see another witch?” you asked.

He sneered. “Yes, your favorite witch, in fact. Well, I shouldn’t keep her waiting.”

He leaned down towards you and kissed the top of your head before immediately dissipating, a move that didn’t feel quite fair. At least it didn’t give him the chance to watch you flounder. 

As you slept that night you found yourself having a familiar dream. The walls of colorful fabrics were a much more welcome sight than the forest that so often plagued your dreams. 

A dream Lucien stood before you, per usual. But something was off this time. It took you a second to place it before you realized that even standing here, passively, you could sense his aura. You knew him too well for the trick he was trying to pull. 

But after an onslaught of little tricks and his rude kiss and run earlier, you were feeling a little more mischievous than normal. Perhaps he was rubbing off on you. 

Before he could say anything to tease you, you strode up to him, got onto the very tips of your toes, and reached up to pull him into a kiss. 

He was too tall for you to be able to pull a maneuver like that without him playing along but he eagerly leaned down to meet you, lips crashing together. His hands fell to your waist, helping you keep your balance as you strained to reach him. 

You pulled away after a moment and looked up at him with a smirk, giving his aura a little tug as you said,  “You really should announce when it's you.”

He laughed. “You didn't give me the chance.”

His hands tightened around your sides, giving you a gentle squeeze as he kept you close. “We don’t have to stop, you know. I’d be a cruel man to rob you of a wet dream.”

Your boldness grew in your chest. You couldn’t remember if you’d ever been around someone and simply not felt nervous before now but these last few weeks, he’d managed to foster that feeling in you. You were eager to try out this new confidence. 

You slipped out of his grasp and fell to your knees in front of him. “You know,” you said, “I haven't been able to thank you for being so kind to me.”

For once he seemed to be at a loss for words. After a moment of floundering, he managed to say, “You don’t need to do that, little one.”

“I want to,” you said, looking up at him with big eyes. 

You barely caught the quiet groan that escaped him. “What did I do to deserve you,” he asked, and it too was quiet. You couldn’t help but wonder if it was a question meant for you or if it was for the universe itself. 

After his little nod of permission, you were immediately undoing his pants, eager to get your hands on him after so many weeks of pining after him. 

Being here, now, it felt silly that you’d denied yourself those feelings for so long. Outside of his little pocket of hell where you’d been able to do as you wished, you’d tried to force down those feelings. 

But now, despite the appearance of his familiar room, nothing was here to help you along. The dam just broke, and you couldn’t help but wish you’d given in much sooner. 

As you pulled down his pants you found he was already hard, his massive cock bouncing up as you freed it of its confines. 

Part of you was glad your first encounter with it was in a dream because it was intimidatingly big. It fit his frame as he towered above you but you were unsure if humans and demons were meant to be together like this. You found you didn’t much care either way. You’d make it work. 

You gave an experimental lick to the tip, your tongue moving lightly across it. 

His hand came down to grab your jaw as you pulled off of him, squishing your cheeks as he angled your face up toward him. 

“You’re too sweet, little one. It’s going to get you in trouble one of these days.”

“Wanna be sweet for you,” you said, leaning into his touch. 

He released your jaw and tilted his head to the side, giving you the reigns. 

You licked up a long stripe up his cock, from the very base. It felt like the most you could manage, your hands encircling him to make up for what you couldn’t do with your mouth. 

His breathing was coming faster, his eyes remaining locked on your form. As your hands pumped up and down his shaft, focusing most of your attention on licking at the head of his cock, you couldn’t help but wonder how much of him coming undone so quickly was because of the actual sensation and how much was from him getting to watch you. 

He seemed entirely entranced. You felt several times as his hands moved to touch you before pulling quietly away, like he could get head from you and yet was nervous to touch, as if that would make it too vulnerable. 

The more grunts and whines you pulled from him, the more determined you became. You pulled back from your persistent licking, taking him in for a moment. 

He might be massive, but you focused on the fact that as real as this felt, it was a dream. Surely in a dream you could do whatever you wanted. You were most certainly going to try.

You managed to fit your lips around the head, your mouth stretched wide. You swirled your tongue around the tip as your hands worked his shaft, determined to draw even more noises from him. 

You looked up with wide eyes, waiting to make sure you were doing okay. You could feel them watering as you worked him over but you pushed past it as those watery eyes met his, pitch black and full of nothing but lust and adoration. 

A massive hand found its way into your hair, not pushing but caressing as you tried to take as much of him as you could. 

The hand tightened in your hair and he grunted out, “I’m going to…”

That was the only warning you got before he started to come. 

You tried to swallow it all but couldn’t manage it.  It just kept coming, it was too much. You popped off the head with a little cough, the rest getting all over your clothes and making you once again glad that this was a dream. 

This would have been a nightmare to explain to Eden. You might’ve just had to burn your clothes and hope for the best. 

Lucien lets out a gentle chuckle, thumb wiping some of his cum off of your face. “A little over-ambitious but I appreciate the enthusiasm.”

You snorted out a laugh and as he looked down at you fondly, you thought you could happily stay here forever.

And then something other than the contentedness and fondness crossed his face, wrinkling his brow.

His expression soured and before you could so much as ask a question, he simply said, “Wake up” and the world around you fell away. 

You woke up frustrated and confused, not understanding why he sent you away. You wanted more and you wanted to stay and more than anything you wanted an explanation. You summoned him almost reflexively, the process second nature to you now.  

Before any of your confusion or frustration could come out, he blurted out, “Let me take you somewhere.”

A wounded little sound escaped you as the moment soured and his obsession with whisking you away appeared once more. “Not a chance.”

“But if you could go somewhere…”

“Can we not do this? Please? I can’t.”

“Can’t?”

“Shouldn’t. Whatever word you want me to use.”

“Why, because she says you shouldn’t? I say you should.”

“I say I shouldn’t. Isn’t that enough for you?”

The fight normally petered out right about there, both of you frustrated and exhausted with the uphill battle of trying to get the other to understand. 

Not today. Something had changed between the two of you and the desire to linger in it, to bathe in the affection, dissipated as he grabbed your arm and the room around you gave way to the stone walls of an alley. 

The narrow, stone corridor was devoid of people but you could hear the buzz of a crowd not far off, probably not more than a few paces away. It was hard to tell exactly as the noise bounced off the walls, echoing in your ears. 

Despite your anger, you found yourself edging closer to Lucien. Anything familiar was welcome in this alien place you’d been thrust into. 

Your breathing got shallower and you pleaded with him. “Take me back.”

“I will if you want me to. Just not yet. Please not yet. You need to leave, you need to not be there.”

You looked up at him with teary eyes, the trust you’d been basking in being shattered in a moment. “Why are you doing this? I know it’s not for me because I don’t want it.”

“She’s made you afraid. You’ve been tricked and trapped and you need to leave. I need you to leave. You just need a push, that’s it. Just need to be away from her.”

“Listen, just because you don’t like her…”

“No, this is not spite talking, you need to listen to me, you need to figure it out.”

You reeled back. “What?” Surely if he knew something that could change this endless fight, he would have told you. What could there possibly be that you needed to figure out all on your own? 

“You just, you need to ask…” his words were cut off with a yell as he doubled over on himself, runes burning into his skin as he spoke. They shone bright red and it almost looked like he was being branded. 

The anger faded immediately into concern as you rushed to his side. 

“What’s happening, I don’t understand?”

“You can’t say anything,” he insisted, a frantic look in his eyes.

“But you said…”

“I know what I said, you can’t ask anything.”

More than anything, that scared you. The constant pleading for you to break free and push back against Eden and now he was doing everything but that, retracing his steps after unmistakable witch marks were burned into him. 

She’d done this. That much was clear. 

You couldn’t keep doing this. You needed to know, needed to understand. 

“Take me back.”

“I…”

You put everything you had into your voice as you said, “Lucien, take me back.”

The use of his name in his already weakened state with the ruins still charred into his skin was enough, he didn’t have it in him to fight back and you were whisked into the depths of the woods. You returned home. 

[symphonybracket]

YouTube links: Mahler 2, Tchaikovsky 6

Comments:

Mahler 2

Have you ever wanted to feel like you're going to shake apart into a billion pieces if someone so much as looks at you. That's how I feel after listening to this beast. This symphony changed my life for real. It's famous for it's ending and for good reason!! It truly feels like your soul is getting blown up and steamrolled. Listening to it live was like getting peeled by god. It calls for 10 horns which is how you know it's going to fuck severely. It comes in 5 movements: good lord oh my god, hehe teehee, oh so that's why they call it the death shriek, crying on the floor for 5 minutes, and I Have Died. The part known as the "Death Shriek" is shown below! And if you're interested in learning more about the symphony, here's my favorite analysis website!

It's an everything in the universe piece and when I sang in the choir for it I think I actually ascended to a higher plane of existence for 15 minutes

I came across (imo) a good video giving a summarised background of Mahler 2, it’s called ‘Gustav Mahler - Symphony No. 2: Explained in 3 Minutes’ by orchestra of the music makers on YouTube

There is also a piano arrangement!

Tchaikovsky 6

Everyone bangs on about the 4th movement but it's the 3rd movement that really hits

tchaik 6 is what i would listen to if i had an hour to live

the 5/4 movement of the tchaik lives rent free in my mind and i think about it every day

It’s beyond gorgeous. The melodies soar, the orchestra swells, and you just need to lie down for a while after listening to it. It’s Romanticism at its zenith. You want to weep and sigh, and it’s impossible to listen to it without literally feeling something.

Symphony No. 6, titled “Pathétique”, was Tchaikovsky’s final symphony. It is an intensely emotional piece, and to many scholars demonstrates the emotional turmoil that characterized much of Tchaikovsky’s life. He died about a week after its premiere, a fact which leads many scholars to debate about whether the content of the piece itself reflects the possibility that he may have committed suicide. The title itself is often translated to mean “impassioned suffering”, although this was most likely a later addition by Modest and not actually part of Tchaikovsky’s vision. Given these facts, many scholars interpret this piece to be about death and suffering. However, this piece can also be seen to represent life and all its contrasting moments. This interpretation is more holistic and inclusive of all of the moments captured in this piece, and also serves to break down the common narrative of Tchaikovsky as a tragic figure.

More comments about Tchaikovsky 6 below the cut (length warning):

Scholarship surrounding Tchaikovsky’s music tends to focus heavily on the ways his confliction over his homoerotic desires appears in his writing. However, his personal letters reveal a much more balanced understanding of himself that goes beyond the common narrative. In one letter written to Modest describing a new relationship with another man, he writes: “I awoke today with a feeling of unknown happiness and with a complete absence of that emotional sobriety that used to make me repent in the morning for having gone too far the day before.” Many of the letters he wrote regarding his relationships demonstrate no shame and no anguish beyond what can be expected of a man living in a homophobic society. It is important to take this information into account when listening to a piece such as this one that has been discussed so frequently, and to understand it beyond the turmoil and strife that it is seen to represent. Like many of Tchaikovsky’s works, this symphony displays a range of human emotions. It is not only representative of tragedy and “impassioned suffering”; it is a depiction of what it is like to live. It is also interesting to note that this piece is used as a signifier of queer desire in the novel "Maurice" by E.M. Forster, a novel also notable for its radical portrayal of a queer man who gets a happy ending. Much to think about there.

The first movement begins with a lone bassoon soloist playing a plaintive minor melody, which later comes back in the strings. As the movement progresses, it grows in intensity and texture. More instruments are added, and the music becomes more frantic, building and building towards the dramatic trumpet fanfare. Throughout this piece, Tchaikovsky continues to make significant use of contrasting dynamics and melodies, reflecting the emotions he hopes to convey through the music. Dramatic, tumultuous sections are interspersed with pastoral woodwind melodies, and the angry brass fanfares give way to a quiet ending.

The second movement is reminiscent of a waltz, and uses the strings and woodwinds more than the brass to achieve its floating melodies. The dynamics ebb and flow to build tension, but this movement never reaches the same levels of anguish that the previous movement does. Tchaikovsky makes use of pizzicato in the strings to convey a lighter, more cheerful mood, and features the upper woodwinds prominently. He also repeats themes frequently, giving the audience something familiar to listen out for as the movement progresses.

The third movement begins with frantic energy in the strings and woodwinds. As more instruments join the rush of music, the underlying eight note accompaniment does not let up, continuing the vivacious beginning through the whole movement. Instruments pass the melodies between each other and engage in conversations across the orchestra. Like the first movement, the brass play a prominent role in creating dramatic climaxes in the music, as well as supporting the march-like conclusion. Conductor Myung-Whun Chung describes the deceptively dramatic ending as, “one of the greatest, most thrilling, but most empty of victories in musical history,” observing that this movement has the energetic finality of a final movement. The reversal of having the true finale be a slower movement represents a shift away from the “Beethovian model of light over darkness” common in most other symphonies of this time period.

As mentioned before, ending on a movement with a slow tempo was a significant shift away from the standard of the time. This innovation inspired many other future composers to use the same technique, most notably Mahler in his Ninth Symphony. The quiet beginning builds up towards a chaotic rush of fast runs throughout the orchestra, only to stop abruptly and continue in halting, cautious bursts of melody. The movement continues with this cycle of rushing up to a climax and backing away as the movement progresses. Tchaikovsky highlights the horns in this movement, giving them both angry, blaring notes which cut through the string melodies and the flowing, lyrical lines that are passed throughout the orchestra. As the piece ends, the instruments fall away until all that is left are steady repeated notes in the basses, bringing this lament of a movement to an understated close.

[the-100-days-of-junkan]

Hey, I love your Junkan art! Just was wondering, you recommended VanadisValentine 's work, which I agree with as I love all their Junkan stuff... but I was wondering, do you have any other Junkan recommendations? Would love to hear them if you do! (Ps. I haven't finished your blood bag work but what I have read of it so far I'm loving!)

Why thankyou for this question! First off glad you like all of the Junkan stuff so far, it's been a labor of love (and obsession) that took 9 months but seeing all the positive reactions has made it all worth it! As for recommendations, I am happy to oblige. I'll admit I haven't read every single Junkan Fic there is, I have made it a habit to go on a crazy binge of as much Junkan as I can, I go through every single page on AO3 and read anything tagged as soft (along with anything that looks like it was worth the risk.)

Hell when it comes to Junkan fics I literally have the Junko/Mikan tag for AO3 bookmarked and right at the top of my screen so I can click anytime, and I'm sure I still have plenty of fics left to read whether it's on this site or somewhere else hidden deep within google search. So if anyone wants to go in the comments/reblogs and give recommendations or even shill their own stuff go right ahead!~

Be sure to remember these, they'll be on the test later (this is foreshadowing) So do allow me to give you the long list of fics to read when you're feeling the vibe

I've already recommended VanadisValentine's works in previous posts, however for the sake of a complete list I'll still put em here.

The Marvelous Makeover of Mikan Tsumiki - VanadisValentine (Absolute Classic, also just really fun to say)

Everything You've Ever Dreamed - VanadisValentine (Quite possibly one of my favorite Fanfics just in general)

Turn Out the Lights - VanadisValentine (More focused on the characters separated along with their thoughts on the relationship but it's a great fic for when you're in the mood)

When Am I Gonna Lose You? - VanadisValentine (An 18+ Fic just as a warning, but if you're old enough and looking for something in that field this is an amazing piece, even with all my skill in the field of drawing funny pictures I don't think I could depict anything near as beautiful as the descriptions featured here. Does that sound pretentious? Yes! But I know what I am lol.) Year of Love and Despair - VanadisValentine (Last one from her on this list, also ongoing! If you want a variety of stories of these two ranging from fluffy to dramatic to sometimes even saucy then this fic is the place for you. Genuine highlight of my year and has helped me get through the tougher days very often. You can also look and see my really excessively long comments on most of the chapters!~)

Living in a Crazy Parallel World - Yurikah (Fair warning, this one is very long, isn't 100% Junkan Focused, and is also unfinished with it's last update being awhile ago. That said I think if you can make peace with that going into it you'll be in for a very well written treat!~)

Soft (But Only for Her) - Kayleen756894 (When I first got into Junkan I had only read a small handful of fics from AO3, this was one of them and I went through it in a single night. Extremely fun experience that covers a wide variety of ideas for Junkan. Fluffy, Tragic, it's the whole nine yards. There's gotta be at least one story in this collection that will appeal to someone if they like this ship)

Smile - Kayleen756894 (Truly amazing, one of the all time Junkan Fics out there. It can be a very stressful read but oh so very worth it in my opinion. And for those who want a fic closer to canon in terms of character depictions while still being on the softer side I think this will satisfy heavily)

Hurt, Hold, Heal - Kayleen756894 (Do you like Junko helping Mikan through a Panic Attack? Do you like Junko trying to be a better person? Do you like Mikan helping Junko just as much as Junko helps her? Oh look it's the fic for you. The ending is really sweet too)

Tomorrow is Lonely - Kayleen756894 (Also 18+, arguably even more than the previous one on the list. Check the tags before you read and if that sounds like something you're into go for it. Me personally I gotta be in a very specific headspace first but when I do read it I enjoy myself, it's real cute and has a lot of great little character moments)

Protectors in Red - Kayleen756894 (Extremely good! Also features Mukuro! So if that's a selling point then I'm sure it'll vibe)

Forgive Me, My Beloved - Gloomy_snake (Significantly out of my normal comfort zone and definitely not what one would expect compared to the other fics here, but an enjoyable read. And if you like Doomed Yuri, it's got plenty packed in.)

Drowning - aparticularbandit (Extremely inspiring piece of writing featuring Alter Ego Junko instead of Original Recipe Junko!)

A Night for Two - TheGreatWave74 (Cute fic with the girlies at the pool)

what's better than this, girls havin fun - oxidize (A Chatfic! It might not give the same lasting impact as other fics on the list, however this was the fic that introduced me to the very idea of Soft Junkan, so I will always cherish it, and make sure to re-read it every now and again for the sentimental value)

Burning Lungs - oxidize (Another unfinished fic, I remember that put me off from reading it for awhile. However when I finally did I got pretty invested, which left the cliffhanger on the last chapter all the more stinging. Hope the author is doin' well! Anyway, great fic, might go a bit overboard on the darker aspects of Mikan and Junko's backstories so be warned, but even with that in mind I enjoyed myself and find myself imagining the potential turns it could have taken. And watching Junko's feelings slow burn into existence was really pleasant, especially as her dynamic with Mikan continues)

School Life of Mutual Loving - MarySutcliff (A Compilation of various fics from various ships, 3 of which are Soft Junkan. I've only read the first two, but if you enjoy them I imagine the third will do something for you, the first chapter also, as far as my research can tell, is the first instance of Soft Junkan.) First Chapter Second Chapter Third Chapter

Queen of the Convenience Store - Orphan_Account (The one where Junko and Mikan do weed. I actually quit weed and went cold turkey about a week or two ago, but I do still enjoy seeing girls kissing while being high. even if i can't remember if they kiss in this oops)

A DR Oneshot from an Orphan_Account (It features a Hot Topic, my inner 2000s kid has to recc it)

The Threshold - character_studious (A Bit Dark, but a pleasant read!)

The Whirlwind Fashionista - Kaz3313 (Cute lil Non-Despair AU fic featuring a very cool mall! The ending also gets a chuckle out of me)

No Regrets - wait i made that one (I wasn't going to put this here initially however as a small spoiler, Day 50 of this project is directly based on this fic. I'm super mixed on how it turned out but hey maybe someone'll like it)

And that's it for now! I may or may not be forgetting a decent amount of fics even among the ones I've read before. And there's plenty I haven't even seen yet, and plenty more to be made overtime I imagine.

Your mileage may vary with a lot of these fics, but hopefully you'll find one that itches your brain good like they itch mine. And if not then I recommend just hitting the Junkan Tag running and see what you can find! Take a few risks and maybe you'll find something surprising.

Have a wonderful day and remember to stay hydrated!~

[birrdies]

deux droites confondues — two straight lines that are impossible to distinguish from each other, or;  two straight lines that might have different definitions but that share all of their points. desert duo (1.2k) - basically a mini mczu prequel

Parallel lines constantly move in tandem. Side by side, they hurtle forever and ever into the oblivion of the endless, blank pages of a college-ruled notebook. Yet, all that time, all those pages later, they never once meet. Ever. That might be sad, but every other pair of lines meet once. Only one time do they cross— whether it be perpendicular or intersecting— before they drift apart forever. They fly off in their own directions, only ever able to look back. Which Scar finds the more tragic of the two. 

They meet before the world ends.

Scar climbs on the bus. It’s half-past five (which means half-past the time he’s usually meant to be heading home) and he’s worn thin.The cane isn’t enough to take the worst of the weight off his aching leg. And as if none of this was enough, the thirty-minute difference is all it takes for the bus to completely fill with tuckered college students, all too keyed-up from sitting in their lecture halls all day. Scar remembers being that age (it wasn’t that long ago, but the briefcase in his hand and his 5 o'clock shadow make it feel like it’s been twenty years); he can hardly fault them for it. 

But wedging himself through a thick crowd of college students is hard enough without a bad leg and a cane. Most pay him no mind as he wrestles his way to the back of the bus, searching for an empty seat. There are none, but there is an unoccupied hanging strap by the final row. Little victories; Scar can take whatever he can get. 

He braces himself against the back of the bus, holding himself steady with his cane with one hand and hanging on for dear-life with the other. Every jerk of the bus sends an electric pain through his kneecap that makes him nearly want to throw in the towel and drive the rest of the way home. 

“Hey, uh.. Excuse me?” 

Scar looks down. In the seat right beside him is a man with big eyes, freckles, and a mess of blondish-brownish hair atop his head. He blinks up at Scar owlishly, but not those cute little owls that look like excellent cuddle-buddies. More like the scary owls that have big, angry eyebrows and that can rotate their head all the way around. 

“Y-Yes?” 

The man works his mouth into an indecisive slant. He hugs a small stack of books to his chest, hiding the titles from Scar’s curious eyes. “Want my seat?” he asks. 

“Oh, no,” Scar says quickly. “No, that is alright. My stop isn’t too far from here—” “Yeah, asking was more a formality,” the guy scoffs. “Scoot.” 

He slides out of the seat, his side brushing against Scar’s as he wiggles his way through the narrow gap and into the aisle. He’s a few heads shorter than Scar, and while he’s incredibly touched at the offer, he can’t help but worry if he can even reach the hanging strap. 

Instead of voicing said concerns, however, he clears his throat and sinks into the seat with what he’s sure is a humiliating shade of pink flooding his face. It’s not that Scar is unused to kindness, or that he can necessarily call the stranger’s oddly-delivered offer as particularly kind, but rather it’s been a month in a new city and he’s the first person that’s looked at Scar past a job interview, past a man in a suit behind a desk, past a tenant trying to find the right place to drop off his security deposit. 

He looks at Scar like the living, breathing stranger that he is— and Scar’s never been more relieved. 

After a few minutes of riding in silence, Scar finally musters the courage to look back up at the stranger, who, to his surprise, can reach the strap just fine. “Thank you,” he says. 

The guy looks down at him from the corner of his eye, pulling one of his wired ear-buds out. “What’s that?” “I was thanking you,” he says. “For giving me your seat. That was mighty nice of you.” The man’s mouth twists up again, like he’s eaten something sour. “Don’t mention it.” He puts his ear-bud back in and turns his face away. 

The chatter of college students becomes nothing more than white noise to Scar. The sun’s setting. The sunlight flashes as the bus passes between buildings, each time washing the curve of the stranger’s cheek in gold. He keeps his eyes turned downward, the weight of his own life, his own troubles, his own musings, evident on his slumped shoulders. He might not think anyone notices, but he nods his head the slightest bit to whatever music he’s listening to. 

It’s all Scar can do not to tug on his red sweater  and ask him a question. Just for the sake of it. Just to learn something, no matter how small or inconsequential. What song was he listening to, and which was his favorite? Where was he heading? What did he want to make for dinner (maybe it would give Scar an idea)? 

But before he can, too caught in the possibilities and a million-and-one fantasies of questions he’ll never ask, the bus brakes whine as it pulls to a stop. A few bodies shuffle off the bus, the sun-kissed stranger among them. He turns his head to Scar before stepping away, giving a half-hearted, sheepish wave with the hand holding the books to his chest. 

“Have a good one,” he says, with what Scar thinks might be a smile. 

Scar smiles back at him and lifts a hand in farewell. “You too.” 

Perpendicular lines. It’s ridiculous, and maybe it’s just one-too-many sleepless nights that has him staring at the stranger’s back as he piles off the bus. Is this a point of crossing? Is this a big enough moment? Or is it parallel lines, far enough from each other’s orbit to not notice? If Scar had gotten out of work on time today, he wouldn’t be on this bus. One glance at his watch tells him he’d be home by now, tucked deep in bed with Jellie purring in his lap, uncaring that it wasn’t nearly bedtime and that he still needed to make dinner. But he didn’t, and how he’s here, sharing an incredibly loud and crowded bus with a perfect stranger. 

If one parallel line moves, changes trajectory, then they are no longer parallel. At one point they will cross, and those directions will keep carrying on, forever and ever into oblivion. But, what do you call two lines that intersect more than once? Is it even possible? 

By most modern math, likely not. But Scar’s always been one for bending the rules.

[ca-suffit]

“loumand were happy together most of the time” is kind of an insane take bc louis spent eps 1-4 haunted by lestat and distracted by a hallucination of him, fought badly with armand and called him a boring beige pillow in ep 5, the closest they probably came to being genuinely happy was in 6, the ep which had louis acting really off (i think jacob himself said he’d regressed to a lot of his past personality). eps 7, 8 and dubai speak for themselves lol. whereas loustat *were* happy, especially when they were raising claudia (“we were a happy trio”), and it’s clear that louis downplayed a lot of that happiness (see all of jacob and sam’s comments about dreamstat reflecting the softer and happier parts of loustat that louis wants to forget). but people also ship them because a) their intense chemistry and b) the whole show revolves around their romance, which is tragic and destructive because they love each other *so much*. it’s fucked up but also so compelling and epic and romantic because they will literally love each other forever and nothing can stop it no matter the cost. that doesn’t mean you have to ship it, but it actually surprises me that someone could even enjoy the show if they don’t even “get” loustat at all

tbh I think an argument could be made for both relationships either way. I don't think any of it has to be a contest of any kind. ppl come into the show from all different backgrounds and awareness of the books / characters or not. I think it's fine to let ppl come into the story however they want.

loustat allowed louis to feel seen for the first time in his life but also unseen in other ways. we do see them have happy moments but the more time goes on, the worse they get and the less "alive" he seems. then there's the explosive endings of the fight and mardi gras. although the show has told us there's layers to this and a general back and forth of whether things were better or worse all over their timeline.

loumand and being in paris gives louis more freedom in ways than he's ever known. he explores hobbies, he feels less judged as a black man in public spaces, he feels like he's allowed to have boundaries and voice desires. armand pretends to relinquish control at times when he knows it's what louis requires to feel good. that's something that lestat wasn't doing. for a lot of S2, in dubai, there is an unease felt and a forced manner of discussing all of these "happy" memories they have together, but a lot of it still feels real. like an authentic couple that's been married a long, long time and settled into each other. 2x5 shows us a layer peeled back and starts to break the illusion, but just like with louis' happy moments with lestat, it doesn't change that those moments still exist.

the show itself is always telling us that everything we see of any of this are parts of a whole. just like real life, all events have different perspectives. if louis' memory hadn't been erased after 2x5 then who knows what would have happened. but louis also wouldn't have left lestat on his own without claudia too, so maybe nothing?

the core of all of these relationships is what they reveal about the characters. while loustat has been said to be the main focus throughout, it doesn't lessen any of the others. all of these characters are around each other for eternity and have to endure each other somehow, whatever their current status with each other. I don't think anyone has to have any relationship preference to watch the show tbh, bcuz they're all related in the end anyway.

[serymn31]

HotD S2E3 raw reaction

I hate watch House of the Dragon with the expectation that it will be bad and ridiculous, with Rhaenyra bias, and I don't expect too much. For me, this episode was less dull than the first two and had its comedic moments. Spoilers ahead.

House of the Dragon or House of the TIME SKIPS? Seriously, this is a lazy trick. The Blackwoods vs Brackens started out as a street fight then BOOM, all of them are dead in the battlefield. They could have given us an epic battle and showed us more about this conflict, about two houses who just needed the flimsiest excuse to kill each other. The two new faces were pretty good for their short screen-time too. Bracken Twink has a lethal face card too. Hope they kept them longer but of course this show will kill anything that will make it interesting.

HARRENHAL is my goth dream and Alys finally showed up and she’s beautiful! I don’t know why there were people who are against Gayle’s casting but with her show look she’s perfect for Alys.

We get a vision scene with young Rhaenyra sewing back Jaehaerys’s head, but this show can’t give us an interaction between Helaena and Jeahaerys when he was alive. Who are MOTHER AND SON.

I actually like that they showed us more of Baela and Rhaena. Rhaena is probably my team black favorite, frustrated, misunderstood, and her family doesn’t value her because she has no dragon yet. Also, have I said FUCK CORLYS yet? This shows that everything is not sunshine and rainbows in Team Black.

Rhaenys is a weird character but I kind of have a soft spot for her. Maybe because I love to see a woman of Eve Best’s age on screen. In this episode, it feels like Rhaenys knows that it won’t end well for her? And she still fought for Rhaena’s claim for Driftmark.

Aegon and Aemond in the brothel. Peak sibling energy from Aegon right there.

Aegon doesn’t look that bad actually when he’s moving in the armor. In the photos he looks like a bug.

JAEHAERA SIGHTING

GOD Gwayne is so CUNTY. What a spoiled bitch! I actually like how Criston put him in his place and reminded him that there’s WAR

Rhaenyra disguising herself to talk to Alicent personally? I agree on most of the criticisms of this scene but from a dumb lesbian POV this was gold. It was so FUNNY. Rhaenyra is flustered and obviously didn’t think this through. “I will be slain but not before I kill you.” It was hilarious.

Damn, why is this always about Viserys? Why do we have this dumb misunderstanding on Alicent’s part. Whether what Viserys wanted or not, Aegon has a pretty strong claim too. However, Alicent was right. There’s really no turning back and its too late for Rhaenyra to stop it.

Good on Rhaenys for reminding her that Aemond’s eye was cut out which indirectly lead to this tragic turn of events

I would like to see an interaction with Helaena and Aegon but Helaena baby, it’s okay for you to grieve. I feel like Jaehaerys’ death is continually being minimized by the writers. Also Helaena’s room is a dream.

That’s it. I actually spoiled myself on tumblr before I watched and let’s see if I still have the attention span for next week’s episodes.

[the-collector-blog]

imo there is reason to believe that thane and baden became very Close to each other the night before their fateful mission. here is my analysis (+ some angst).

that night — thane notices baden's charm. baden says it's his family's crest and goes on about how his niece, estrilda, gifted it to him before he left for war. how she only listens to him and is a mischievous child who loves swordplay. he says that thane would get along with her very well.... perhaps baden is thinking about whether or not he'll come back, and who may bear his crest if he doesn't. who will be there for estrilda. it is apparently forbidden to give somebody an item like this unless they are your family or lover.

next... baden teases thane and proposes that they spar to see who can best who. after some brief sparring— "CLANG," "BANG"— they declare that tomorrow they'll be victorious. you know, because it's always nice to build up confidence before a tough battle, and to form a ~deeper connection~ with your brother(s)-in-arms.

(it all perfectly fits the trope of getting with someone/finally expressing your feelings towards them before an event that could spell the end for you. [edit 7/26: they'd both been drinking before this.] and with how flirty baden was... by the candlelight, alone in his tent at night, stroking his sword.... putting it away once his Friend came in, then taking it out again to spar with said friend...... ahem i'm sorry it's just so funny to me— time to put on the serious cap again though)

the next day — baden saves thane from the brink of death/defeat and they try to escape. baden realizes that mauler forces will soon overwhelm them, however... so he vows to hold them off. and thane...

baden grabs his hand... and once he lets go, thane realizes that baden was giving him the family crest. vowing to protect his lover with his life, making thane his family, passing on his legacy, and trusting him to care for his beloved niece in his stead.

i suspect they became lovers that night. tragic, as one would sacrifice himself for the other, seemingly never to see him again...

then let us fight together again... thane. like the old days.

just like the old days.

[dongslinger--420]

Thoughts on the chicken for days episode?

I used to skip it on all my rewatched of bojack after maybe my third rewatch because I think I got it in my brain that it was an unimportant dumb episode. But then on my last rewatch I made the effort and realised that it's actually better than I remembered. Still dumb lol. But not "bad dumb." It's like the Todd episode before the Actual Todd episode.

And I'll big admit that the joke in this episode where people keep asking Becca the chicken questions and taking her varied buck sounds as legit responses got me xD

Hi! Before I get onto anything else, I'd like to ask you to please not use the word "dumb" on my blog. I really don't like that word and I've mentioned it a couple of times before, but I understand that you probably didn't know, so I'd just ask you to not do it again.

Moving on to my actual answer, I have two things that I'd like to talk about in regards to Chickens:

1. Social commentary

I'm vegan, and so is Raphael Bob-Waksberg, although I'm unaware as to whether the writer of the episode, Peter Knight, is. As a result, this episode functions as a commentary in favour of veganism, and when I first watched the episode, this really struck me, because it was the first time I had seen this in any show.

Yes, this is a world where humans and anthropomorphic animals coexist, and as a result they couldn't make a one-on-one comparison (on that note, I would love to watch an episode that shows how they reached this conclusion in the first place). However, the comparisons that they do make are generally handled very well. Many people do think that eating animals is justified simply because they are of lesser intelligence to humans. Yes, the livestock in this episode are bred to be of lesser intelligence, but the justification is still there. Many organisations (including the RSPCA) refuse to acknowledge the hypocrisy of eating animals while claiming to care for them, using the fact that it is legal as justification. And lastly, it tears into the whole concept of "humane slaughter", by taking the stance that as long as anyone doesn't want to die, no slaughter is humane (in addition, it also talks about how people who work in slaughterhouses are traumatised, which is another reason not to fund them).

All in all, it achieves its purpose just as well as any other social justice issue this show covers, and it's INCREDIBLE to me how Bob-Waksberg and Knight were gutsy enough to cover a social justice topic that is far from the dominant ideology. It frustrates me to no end whenever people say that "this episode was fucked up" because the real life equivalent is just as fucked up! Please unlearn your cognitive dissonance!

2. Character work

It's interesting that you mention Todd in this ask because I consider the episode as being more focused on two other main characters: BoJack and Diane.

BoJack's overall arc this season is heavily connected to Kelsey, because Kelsey reminds him of two people: Herb and Beatrice. The Herb comparisons tend to come later on in episodes like Fish Out Of Water, so I'm going to be focusing on Bea here. Bea's personality is established to us in Brand New Couch, where we see how her abuse and undermining of BoJack has affected him. Chickens functions as a development of this, with BoJack's shitty upbringing meaning that he is naturally drawn to older people who are cold to him. As a result of this, BoJack spends the entirety of this episode trying desperately to impress Kelsey, while she continues to give him the cold shoulder. And here's the kicker: Kelsey genuinely believes he's incredible. Everyone, including us, already knows this, because why else would she have hired him? He never needed to impress her. And as a result, the fact that he spends so much time trying to impress her is deeply tragic and ironic. He doesn't even learn how she feels about him until four episodes later. No opinions change at the end of this episode, because it's the second of three acts in this overall story arc.

Diane's utilitarianism is given much more focus this season than in the previous one. It was briefly touched on in Yesterdayland, but in this episode she is directly forced to face the sad truth that she is a failure in her own eyes. First, she meets Irving, who reminds her deeply of herself when she was younger, and she realises how little she has achieved since she was Irving's age. Next, she gets branded as "the maid" when running away with Todd, thereby causing Irving's opinion of her to lessen as she realises how much she is actually useful for. Finally, the episode ends with the bittersweet notion that actually, Diane didn't do anything. Against her best efforts, Diane was completely powerless to save Becca, and Chicken4Days continues to go even stronger. Nothing is resolved in this arc, with the brief exception that she forms a genuine connection with Todd, as well as earning Irving's approval on her own terms. The issue doesn't go away, and two episodes later she tries again, even harder this time, only to be faced against the entire world, and eventually be forced to give in.

Chickens is a silly buddy storyline that hides a DEEPLY tragic core, in which seeds are spread for two major character arcs for us to uncover.

[thesnazzysharky]

Dēteriōrātus Voluntās - A Ghost Cow Short Story

TW: Starvation and self cannibalism. AO3 link here. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 4 days... 5 days...? Well, I've officially lost count now... My rations have ran out. My bodY thins and weakens as it consumes itself. I'm skin and bones with no meat. I have drunk my own urine out of thirst and gnawed at my fingers and arms for what little bits of food I can obtain. I have not slept since I have settled myself in this room. The room is pitch dark. I have a flashlight, but I do nOt want to turn it on and be horrified at the sight of my own body or potentially something else...

Yet I still remain. I still prevail. Everybody else in the hospital is now dead, I presUme. Except for me. I'm hidden. I'm safe. I'm sane. I'm content with this small, dark, comforting room. Sometimes I hear faint whispering in my ear. Sometimes I hear something walk past the door. Sometimes I hear groaning or wailing under me. Sometimes I feel something touch my shoulder. Sometimes I smell something enticing outside the door. Sometimes see straNge images and visions in the sparse moments where I close my eyes longer than I should. I can't say for certain whEther this is due to lack of sleep or something paranormal, but it doesn't matter to me. None of it matters. I shall stay safe and alive. Safe from the "ghost". I have read or heard of stories of all kinds of monsters, ghosts, and cryptids. Freaky, weird, and potentially dangerous abominations that poor souls would sometimes stumble across. One thing consistent with these stories howeVer, was that these creatures always had a reason for behaving how they did. Sometimes they were acting on purely animalistic instinct. Sometimes they had a strange and alien morality to them. And other times thEy were victims of a tragic past. Not the creature roaming around in the hospital though... no. This creature is something that I have never seen or heard of before. I have seen the things it has done. I have seen how it manipulates otheRs. I have seen how it controls. I have seen how purely sadistic and void of any soul it is.

It's not a ghost. It's not a demon. It's not a monster. It's something else entirely. Something that I can't wrap my head around. I don't know what this thing is, but what I do know is that it's not doing what it does out of any instinctive nature, alien morality, or vengeance for what it had previously gone through. It does not seem to have any big or meaningful goal. It just simply popped up here one day and began causing havoc. It's a petty creature. Made evident by the fact that it chose a hospital of all things to spread misery and suffering in. A place where people should be comforted and helped became a place Where people were tortured and killed. It knows what it's doing. It loves the suffering it's causing. It's doing this purely for fun it seems. Not too unlike a child burning ants with a magnifying glass or tearing the legs off a caterpillar one by one.

I suspect it's searching for mE. To manipulate and control. To cause me agony and delusion. Unfortunately for it, it will never find me. Others have tried ways to get rid of it. Suicide. Radiation machines. Breaking their own fingers or cutting off their hands. Giving themselves concussions. Quitting their jobs. Yet they all still died in the end. Such pathetic idiots. Why did none of them think of the simple and correct solution? Hiding yourself away, somewhere dark and unremarkable at a glance. Never falling asleep, as the creature can't haRm or possess me if I'm always on alert. Staying completely calm, not taking any notice to the odd things you see, hear, smell, or feel. You aren't in any actual danger. In the end, I am victorious. I am resourceful. I am safe. I am content. I am sane. ... I closed my eyes for too long again. I'm not safE in this room.