#how to solve difficult problem
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apotelesmaa · 11 months ago
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WxS gathering around tsukasa and going “tsukasa is the type of guy to say ‘they’re right behind me aren’t they’” “tsukasa is the type of guy to see a box of donuts and wiggle his fingers while going ‘don’t mind if I do’” “tsukasa is the type of guy to shout eureka when he solves a problem” “tsukasa is the kind of guy to sleep like honk shoo honk shoo” and he gets so mad because he can’t even defend himself. they’re 100% right.
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dailycupofcreativitea · 1 year ago
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Drew this for @sunkenshipsanddreams's really well-developed AU (background is completely theirs). Always interesting seeing my boi in different AUs 🥹
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rearranging-deck-chairs · 6 months ago
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Hi hello I watched all of carmilla in a weekend when I was 17 because a student teacher who in retrospect I had a bit of a crush on mentioned that she knew one of the actresses. also I am pretty invested in all your recent vampire stuff because I watched iwtv in 2 days last week because your edit intrigued me
oh hiiii 🫶 thank you for indulging me. thats so cool that you watched iwtv! did it live up to the expectation?
i also watched carmilla at 17! or like, 17-19. i found it when s2 had just started and followed it to the end. did something permanent to my brain but i think it was a good thing. on rewatch now im like, i was right to like this. like it's a solid show, it's good. it has its flaws obviously but it's well written, the emotional moments still get me, i can see why i liked it and i still like it now even when it's not anymore, you know, meeting every need that baby gay me didnt even know they had
what it doesnt reaallyy do though - i dont remember if i posted abt this or if i left it in my drafts but - is explore vampirism as a concept. their subject matter is more lesbianism than vampirism. which is great! thats what they wanted to do and they did it and it's very good. but reading interview with the vampire the book rn im realising how much potential vampires have to be metaphors for like so many things and i started wondering like 'wait, did carmilla just not really engage with it or did it all go over my head'. but it just didnt really engage with it all that much. which again is fine bc that wasnt what they were doing. im glad they were more about the lesbianism than the vampirism
but there's this interesting difference in framing, because in iwtv they keep calling armand 'ancient' right? and emphasising how old he is. and he's like 500? and i was like 'wait isnt carmilla like 400?'. she isnt, shes 340, but still, thats getting there, you know? and we know quite a lot about her history, but kind of just the Big Events. when she was turned, the events of the novella, coffin of blood, silas. thats sort of what we know. but none of the long lonely slog of history day to day you know? with armand i feel like we can really feel how much time everything takes. how every one of those years is made up of single days. with carmilla i dont feel that as much. i keep kind of thinking about daniel, when louis calls him a boy in the first episode, saying "im an old man, with all the triggers that come with it"
because carmilla might look 18 (or mid twenties at this point) but she has lived all that time. shes also seen her native land be claimed by like a succession of ruling powers, right? like armand. shes been buried alive, like louis. when lestat is born, shes already 80 years old, shes lived a whole human lifetime, and the entire adult part of it shes been a vampire. shes lived through 1680-1870 being a lure. i compared her to abigail hobbs in some tags on a post, i dont know if youre familiar with hannibal the tv show, but i do also kinda keep thinking about that comparison
if youre not familiar, in the first episode of hannibal the murderer of the week is this guy garrett jacob hobbs who kills and cannibalises girls who resemble his daughter. and later on it turns out she was made to be his lure. like they'd go places and he'd sent her to the victims to make friends and maybe get them back to their home or smth. not sure if they specified all the details. but that's what carmilla did for mother. and in s2 we hear from mattie that while every couple of decades carmilla had to lure victims for the fish god, she also seemed to just enjoy humans between those times, right? like the doctor, gets lonely, gets a new companion. but we've only sort of got mattie's mocking word for it ("dont eat him, hes a poet! or her, shes got such a wonderful voice. or that one, shes just too pretty to ruin"), we don't know exactly from carmilla's point of view what she was doing or why. if mattie's talking about stuff that happened after the blood coffin, 1950-now, then i think it's a fair assumption based on what carmilla says in the s1 sock puppet show that after she'd figured out what the real situation was and what her role in it was, when she'd started trying to save girls from being sacrificed, that she mightve been doing the same trying to save people from becoming mattie's victims. it's probably more likely that she was just trying to find excuses to stop mattie from sucking someone dry rather than actually having like an aesthetic based morality. but it might be a bit of both. im still trying to figure out what her philosophy actually is, like i dont know what existentialism actually means ghkfjghkj but i will
i also found it pretty striking in the movie when shes turning back into a vampire she says like "this was supposed to be done, you know? the blood lust, the self-loathing, the sleeping tied to a chair in my own bedroom". thats what defines her vampirism, wanting blood and hating yourself for it (the third part is a joke/reference to s1 but also i think meaningful for how she sees her relationship with laura when she IS a vampire. little bit of that 'she will reject me for my monstrousness' shining through). and thats what defines vampirism for lots of vampires across the genre obviously, but i dont know, it struck me. we dont get a lot from carmilla's pov, we know a fair amount about her, but the story is always told through laura. we get laura's diaries, but just snippets here and there from carmilla, what shes thinking, how shes feeling
and i love that shes a philosopher. i love that thats how she seems to try and find something to hold onto, in a world that kind of moves around her, having been murdered, kidnapped, turned and groomed to be a lure on the cusp of adulthood, never having been properly loved (the relationship with her father wasnt good she says in s3, and her mortal mother i dont think has ever been mentioned (like laura's)). the only good relationship she seems to have had for the better part of 3 centuries seems to have been mattie, and mattie seems to love being a vampire. i can imagine carmilla just sort of going along with anything mattie wants to do just because shes so desperate for that friendship. not like, against her will necessarily really. but more like, she hasnt even had the space to develop her own will, you know? and philosophy lets you do that. philosophy gives you frameworks to understand the world and to develop your own opinions on it. and by the 21st century she seems to have developed those opinions, she has a sense of her own values, but shes also still stuck in that same situation. shes jaded and cynical in the face of laura's optimism and strong moral code a lot of the time in s1 because she feels probably pretty powerless. like she does what she can to save some girls but at the end of the day shes scared of her mother and she has nowhere else to go really, right?
i like how she grapples with that over the course of the series, in tandem with laura grappling with her black and white morality. she sort of jumps ship from her mother to laura bc theyve fallen in love, but then laura still stuck in her hero thinking refuses to see her monstrous side. not literally bc i think the biological vampirism never seemed to be a problem for laura, but morally. the having murdered. carmilla needs laura to see that and love her while seeing it bc the last girl she loved rejected her for being a vampire.
but you see her kind of swing back and forth in s2. she softens first with laura but then they break up and she leans back hard into the sarcastic cynic defense mechanisms, leans hard into "im a monster, dont expect heroism from me". but thats like, it's sort of learned helplessness i think. it's powerlessness, resignation. bc morally shes not a monster. maybe she doesnt have as strong a drive to help other people as laura does and is a little more selfishly hedonistic in that she just wants to enjoy her/their life, but she doesnt hurt people for fun, she never has. she just sort of didnt have another option for a Really long time. so she pretends she doesnt care. "im a vampire, this is what i do, this is who i am". but clearly from the way she talks about it when she turns back into one, she doesnt enjoy it
and i like how she goes even further in s3, where she starts swinging even more to the heroic side, bc she sees hope. shes like "wow if we kill my mother, i'd be free". theres hope and she becomes like a lot more active. and shes like that at the start of the movie too, a lot happier, a lot more relaxed, and then vampirism is back and bam depression gfhgkjh like shes immediately more gloomy, ashamed of her past and her self, retreats into herself
sorry i just took this as an opportunity to dump all the carmilla thoughts floating in my head on you. you didnt ask fhkghgjh consider this an open invitation to you or anyone else to come talk to me about carmilla
#just finished watching the movie and i had actually forgotten but at the end shes a vampire again!#they totally gave us a super great opening for more conflict to explore hollstein's relationship#bc carmilla sort of puts closure to her past by taking responsibility for her part in it and it makes her a vampire again#and laura is like 'dont give up on our life together' and shes like 'im not giving up on anything!'#and laura is like 'we're supposed to live and get old and have grandkids how are we gonna do that if you dont age'#so thats a great set up#im putting the fic im writing i think another 5 years in the future#bc the movie is 5 years from the end of the series and im doing another 5 years so it's 2024#but theres so much opportunity to play there. theres conflict. tehres problems to solve. but theyre in a good place#i dont think they ever specify how vampires are made in this universe#therees some posts on carmillas blog where she responds to asks abt why she doesnt turn laura or if she would#and she just says 'you have no idea how this works'#but that was still during the series and the writers obviously wanted to keep their options open and their writing cards a bit closer to#the chest#but at this point you could make laura a vampire#you could explore that. see how they both feel abt that. would bea difficult decision#theyre also not married yet in the movie#they celebrate carmilla's 'rebirthday' where she turned human again#you could do a thing where they turn laura on that same day. sort of make that their wedding#not an easy decision i think. i think it would take a lot of discussion to get them there but not impossible#and would be fun to explore. both their feelings abt all that. and like anotehr 5 years in the future where they are in their lives#idk idk. brainstorming#thanks for giving me an opportunity to infodump a little :)#carmillaposting
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milfbrainrot · 5 months ago
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"claire's a bad mom" claire chose to have her kids claire tells her kids bedtime stories and claire pretends not to be in life threatening danger when she's terrified for her own and her kids' safety to help them stay calm and literally only wants to know if they're okay before prioritizing herself and keeping them far away from danger by rescuing herself i think ur just racist
#TO tag#anyway i like isaac's role here#i do wonder if the 'you do not have a husband' observation from him was the writers implying single parenthood is bad#and too difficult etc even though literally 99% of parents would yell at their kids for throwing things in a shuttle anD CRASHING THEM#i think any additional support in parenting is great but i do not like the nuclear family norm isaac was going off of even if it#was meant to be a convo starter given how it is also supposed to point out a problem -#claire having kids without a husband - that he can Solve#BUT ALSO I LIKE HIM IN THEIR FAMILY?#the orville experience is 'wow fucked up implications to get to this conclusion. unfortunately i like this conclusion.'#like him holding her hand while she's breaking down about ty?#you can kinda tell she has had the burden of everything bad that has ever happened to them on her and her alone#and for once she isn't alone in it? and that does mean something#it does not mean she is an insufficient parent#it just means it's easier with help#and idk if i trust the writers to understand that lol#espppppp with certain stereotypes but i am not going to get into that#i will say it is interesting she is a single black mom by choice#in a way that subverts the expectation that the kids' dad(s) left#but there are still stereotypes about fatherless black kids? so i am cautious abt the idea that isaac is Fixing things by filling a role#idk like you just rly gotta be careful with the implications lol i dont have the braincells to articulate it but#i think in most other media i would be slightly less concerned despite inevitable biases everywhere it's just.#this show in particular and its general audience base i do not trust#.... i have got to shut the fuck up but (metallic) white savior complex#i think i am making problems where there are non lmfao but i also notice a possible issue with at least how theyre perceived#with isaac INEVITABLY being the calm non emotional logic one#whereas... bc she is human!! claire gets angry#isaac's logical 'parenting' was more effective in conflict resolution#makes sense.#i do just wonder. how claire being a black woman. with emotions.#is coming into play. with how people see her human reactions vs isaac the actual robot's approach
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redgearsmovin · 6 months ago
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[ID start: Various digital sketches of Imagination Movers characters: Nina, Dave, Scott, Smitty and Rich. End ID.]
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watery-melon-baller · 8 months ago
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lads it's so fucking frustrating when you desperately want to learn and understand something but u just can't fucking get ir
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south-sea · 2 years ago
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pincushion hog (he's fine don't worry)
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wesavegotham · 1 year ago
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Obviously I have no idea where Tom Taylor will be going with his Dark Knights of Steel elseworld, but the first book pushes the idea that Bruce, despite being a bastard (he's the illegitimate son of late Queen Martha and Jor-El in this) should inherit the throne one day since he's the only one related to the original monarchs of the kingdom, and I can't help but imagine Bruce sitting one the throne one day and he swears to himself to only sire "trueborn children" so no biologically related child of his would ever suffer from growing up as a bastard like he did...and then Damian is introduced to him.
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capricioussun · 1 year ago
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Genuinely, I am sorry about all the questions and polls, I've just been really brain fuzzed lately and struggling with motivation and decisions, it helps a lot to already have a direction to go in ;;
So, if anyone has any specific AUs or ideas they'd like to see a document thing about, please lmk!
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kalashtars · 1 year ago
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my toxic trait is that i find people who say ao3 is hard to navigate insufferable. you're telling me you can't read words? and click the button with the word? i'm actively and harshly judging you right now because ten year old me had no problem with it, and you can't seem to figure it out? lmao.
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Dua To Fix Marriage Problems Immediately
Marriage is a long time commitment. But when two unknown people stay together. Some problems can arise. And it needs trust, the capacity of understanding to make the marriage work. But if everything your marriage still has problems, the best thing is to ask for Allah’s help. There is a dua to fix marriage problems. And by performing it, your marriage problems will vanish. Dua To Fix Marriage…
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View On WordPress
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yeetbean · 2 years ago
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should i dump my therapist
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andrrrgynous · 2 years ago
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sometimes you just start to dislike someone out of nowhere for no reason but this time it happened to be someone whose biggest fear is abandonment and the idea that everyone hates them and now i feel like a horrible person
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beep-beep-imma-sheep · 8 months ago
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Gentle reminder that
Smart ≠ Wise ≠ Literate ≠ Jerk ≠ Know-it-all
A character can be really good with, say, numbers but know absolutely nothing of history. Or be really clever and tactical but never once in their life has opened a book. Or be a genius when it comes to music, but being a complete idiot when trying to efficiently arrange objects in certain space. Or instinctively coming up with clever solutions, but lacking the words to express them. Or having a very vast vocabulary, but but it's not someone actually clever.
The say way someone can posses a lot of knowledge in a variety of areas but being unable to put that knowledge to practice, to use, or intertwine that knowledge to find a new and creative way to come up with an answer to a problem.
There are a lot of way to be smart. A character can be smart and ignorant. A character can be smart but know oh-so-little about a lot of things.
Yes, the character can be your stereotypical know-it-all that has all the solutions in less than a minute, doesn't miss a thing, gets impatient and cocky because no one can keep up with them and so one, but it doesn't need to.
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watery-melon-baller · 7 months ago
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its so fun :)) and awesome :)) that i cannot fucking make my brain focus on my homework :))) holy shit im gonna kill someone :)) why can't my brain just work for five fucking minutes :)) this is easy homework too I just can't concentrate on it at all :)) and it's due tomorrow morning :)))
#yes I AM bitching about physics again#having a hyperfixation is stupid and awful and fucking sucks#Jesus Christ stop thinking about toh for FIVE MINUTES#and physics is like. I struggle with it. I'm slow#I need all of my brainpower to focus and problem solve but I genuinely!! Cannot!! Focus!!!#It's so insane. All comprehension skills go out the window#if I fail this class then I'm genuinely fucked like. I can't even begin to describe how screwed I am if I fail this class#Or even if I pass this class but barely understand it#and it goes so fast and i don't have anyone I can go to for help#with calc 2 I was going to the tutoring center every week!!!#but I can't do that!!! And I don't know anyone who knows physics#and it's not like I have friends in the class :))) because I'm so socially stunted it's embarrassing :))))#Jesus fucking Christ I can't function like a normal person#my brain has just been completely rotted from two years of doing nothing but bullshit art projects and now I've lost all critical thinking#im just frustrated because this isn't even the difficult part#SHE LITERALLY TOLD US WHAY TO DO IN CLASS#I JUST FUCKINH. CANNOT. FOCUS OR EVEN COMPREGEND IT#AND I WROTE DOWN EXACTLY WHAT SHE SAID AND IT MADE SENSE IN CLASS#BUT NOW MY BRAIN IS ALL FUZZY AND I CANNT UNDERSTAND A WORD#AND I PROCRASTICATED ALL WEEKEND BECAUSE. I COULD NOT FUCKING FOCUS#BECAUSE OOOOHHH MAYBE ILL JUST MAGICALLY START FOCUSINH IF I WAIT LONG ENOUGH#NOPE!#FUCK ME I GUESS#THIS IS DUE TOMORROW SO I HAVE TO GET THIS DONE#ITS LIKE MY BRAIN IS SLUDGE I CAN'T THINK CLEARLY AT ALL#if i can't do well in this course then. um. i don't wanna say my life is ruined but. it fucks up so many things for me#I don't know dude I just can't wrap my head around this kind of stuff and I'm stressed#lilac post#im aware im being self pitying and this won't help me but im feeling bitchy 2nite
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rivilu · 13 days ago
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A little to the left situation of the 'never trust your brain after 9pm' post where instead of cut and dry catastrophizing, after 2:30 am I start making extremely accurate self psychoanalysis specifically about the most depressing aspects of my life
#hee hee hoo hoo im going to paint some new pins with gouache today :)#my brain: even if all our stressors and problems were solved tomorrow - even if magically we transitioned and all was well-#the lasting consequences of 7 straight years of being actively suicidal are something that will never leave and even if we have somehow#dodged developing even more severe mental illnesses than what we're officially diagnosed with ( though we do display such symptoms already)#even the simplest interactions with people are something we'd have to relearn from scratch trying to ignore how we spent the first twenty+#years of this life viewing all interactions as if an alien piloting a suit rather than a person#and the last 7 while also emotionally degrading to the degree that we've felt like the worst version of ourselves for years which#undoubtedly will be very difficult to come back from even in the most ideal recovery circumstances#in a way our parents saying that transitioning wont magically solve all our problems has become a self fulfilling prophecy#since the near decade long wait has conjured up MORE severe issues that will most definitely be chronic#there's feeling lost because you didnt expect to be here five years ago#and then there's our situation of being told to set up things for an ambiguous long term life while STILL not being able to picture tomorro#in order to potentially get access to the lifesaving care that would let us PICTURE that tomorrow. and who's to say that when that day come#all that damn setup goes to waste? what if a clear view for the first time ever motivates a full change in direction?#even the light in the tunnel- that ambiguous 'good future' carries massive uncertainty and fear now that wasnt there before#all these factors compile and weigh heavier and heavier and create a vicious cycle of suicidality and depression#ESPECIALLY when sat analyzing it all like this which happens nearly every night and anyway#that's probably part of why Elluin has become a load bearing wall of trauma projection these past few months#though tbh the whole inevitability of his death and/or assimilation into a timeloop hivemind thing is not exactly helping us with that#Me- still holding a brush: ...dude#tw sui ideation#river rambles
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